#i fully cried at least four times i hate it here

[letsgetrowdy43]

Do first, think later—

Jack Hughes x Reader

Request: Jack’s gf finds out she’s pregnant but Jack doesn’t know how to process it at first. So she felt alone and decided to take a trip back home to Michigan to see family but Jack freaks out and flies out of NJ to see her

She and Jack had their fair share of pregnancy scares over the span of their relationship, no matter how careful they were there was always a chance and a moment of pure fear while staring at the time on their phones as they watched the negative sign slowly appear.

This time though, this time was different.

The symptoms were really strong, nausea was insane, her boobs had grown a cup size, and the food aversions were becoming intense. That's when Jack suggested maybe testing, just to stop the stress from building, fingers crossed that the tiny stick would show the answer they both wanted. But as that second line appeared both Y/n and Jack went down a spiral, her hands covering her mouth to stop the gasp that was bubbling up in her throat.

"Okay, we can-" the tears started as she looked up at her boyfriend who stared at the counter in shock. All of the colours drained from his face as he swallowed thickly, finally looking at her, "I need to go for a walk," he said making a bee-line for the front door. She cried quietly while following him to the door, disbelief filling the empty space between them as he ignored the pleas for him to stay, "Can we at least talk about this before you leave Jack?" "I need to leave, I'll be back," he promised, still not fully looking at her as he slipped on his sneakers and was out the front door.

He didn't return that night, or the next, finally on the third day, she finally got confirmation on where he was. She had called Jack multiple times, then she called Quinn, Ellen, Dawson, John, Jesper, and then finally she called Nico who answered immediately.

"Please tell me he's with you, if he's not I'm filing a missing persons report," she said desperately as he let out a sigh. "Yeah he's here, physically at least, he seems zoned out," Nico frowned as he peaked into the living room at the twenty-two-year-old who was quietly staring out the apartment window. a weight lifted off of her chest as she heard the words, "Okay good, at least he's safe."

"What happened? if you don't mind me asking," he asked, shutting his bedroom door so that Jack couldn't hear their conversation. Tears welled up in her eyes as she sat down on the edge of her and Jack's bed, surrounded by clothes and a suitcase, "I'm pregnant, and we thought it was just a scare, but it wasn't, and then he left." "Oh." "I'm really fucking scared Neeks," she cried as her hands wiped away the smudged mascara from her cheeks, "I'm going home to my parents, I don't want to be alone right now," she tried to find a strong voice but lost as she received the notification with the confirmation of her flight. "You do whatever you need, I'll make sure he's safe, you go and be with your family," he said as she whispered a thank you and hung up to finish her packing.

Within the next twenty-four hours the girl found herself in the Detroit airport, Quinn waited for her in the arrivals, pulling her into a hug as he helped her with her bags and led her to the family van.

"He's gonna come to his senses," Quinn said reassuringly as she cried in the passenger seat, her puffy face hiding in her hands as Quinn ran a hand over her back. "He disappeared when I needed him," she frowned. "Trust me, I am not excusing his actions, I'm so mad at him for doing that to you," livid was more the word he would use to describe it, his brother was a much better man than the one who abandoned his young, pregnant girlfriend, "he's more of a do now, think later kind of guy, you know that, he just needs time, and when he comes back to his senses he's gonna hate himself."

She knew it was true, there was never an action that Jack Hughes made that he didn't immediately cringe after. He lived a life of regret, and this was going to be one of those things in his life that he's gonna look back at and be disgusted at for the rest of his life.

"So are you going home to your parents or mine?" Quinn asked as he looked from the road to her. She frowned and thought for a second before she looked at him, "Probably yours, if you think your mom wouldn't mind, I don't think I can tell my mom and dad yet, not while I'm so panicked," she mumbled as the tears started back up again.

Quinn frowned, trying to think of something to say to take her mind off of his idiotic brother, "So I'm gonna be an uncle? I've always wanted a nephew... a niece would be pretty sweet too" The girl grinned at his dorkiness, "Yeah? I've always thought Jack would be a good girl-dad," she grinned as her hand slid down to touch her stomach, her eyes widened at the realization that she was going to be a mom.

Jack returned to their shared apartment the night she flew back to Michigan, his heartbeat in his ears as he searched the apartment for her, only to be met with an empty closet and a lack of her bubbly presence. He chewed his bottom lip nearly off as he did another search of the house, his head spinning with nerves as he stumbled upon a sticky note stuck to the fridge.

"I'm going home for a bit, please call me when you're home and safe, just need to hear your voice -- Y/n <;3"

His phone started ringing loudly, his shaky hands fishing it out of his pocket as he re-read the note over and over again.

"Hello?" "Why is your girlfriend asleep in your old bedroom, looking like the shell of herself, by herself? So help me Jack if you did something to upset that poor girl I will have your head," Ellen scolded over the phone, his body deflated at the sound of his mother's voice instead of Y/n's.

"I fucked up Mom, like so bad," he started, and so did the tears, "I left her here all alone when she really needed me, and I just walked out," he stated rambling, choking on tears as his breaths grew short. Ellen started to tear up at the sound of her son in such distress, "Honey, I need you to breathe, can you do that for me?" she asked as she heard his cries grow quieter on the other end.

"What did you do? I'm sure you can fix it." "She's pregnant, I'm gonna be a dad," Ellen's jaw dropped as she stood in the silence of the Hughes Lakehouse, looking over to Jim who stared at her with furrowed brows. "I'm gonna give you some advice Honey. You are going to get on a flight as soon as you can and fix this in person," Ellen said as she hung up the phone and left him to deal with the issue of his own.

Jim stared at her with a quirked eyebrow, "we are gonna be grandparents," she grinned as Jim choked on his coffee.

Less than twelve hours later, Jack was on the porch of his family's summer house, his heart beating at a fast pace as he stared at the door, trying to convince himself to open it. He took a deep breath and opened the door to be met with Luke who looked at him with a confused look, "you look like shit dude," he said as Jack rolled his eyed. "Thanks, much appreciated, where's Y/n?" "She's out in the back, she was sitting on the dock," Luke shrugged, unaware of all of the tension floating around the house.

She was exactly where Luke said she would be. Sat prettily at the edge of the dock, watching the sunset on the rippling water, a foot in the lake as she stared away numbly.

He stood at the shore, hands shoved in his pockets as he watched her, staring so peacefully, but looking so small, so unsure of herself. He hated that he did that, just as Quinn had suspected. Jack knew they could do it, they could be parents, but in the heat of the moment he wasn't so sure, and now it was leading to be the biggest regret of his life. Even with their young age, a family was everything he dreamed of, this just happened to be a few years earlier than his original plan.

She looked back at him, tears in her eyes as she ushered him to sit next to her, "Please stop just staring at me, it's making me nervous," she sadly joked as he walked over and sat down on the aged wood right next to her.

He stared at her as she watched the horizon, her bottom lip pulled between her teeth as she ignored his gaze, "I'm sorry, about it all," he frowned as she blinked away the tears in her eyes. Jack knew he was gonna need to say a lot more but the words were dying on the tip of his tongue as she ignored him some more.

"We are just so young, and the positive showed up and I just blanked and all of sudden I was in Nico's living room with a million missed calls from everyone and I realized that I'm going to be a Dad." The tears started as he reached out for her hand, she pulled away from his grasp, wiping away her own tears. "I came back to reality and realized that I fucking failed you, I've never hated myself more for something in my life, cause you're my person and I left you, and by extension, I left our baby and holy shit I'm the worst ever Y/n," she finally looked at him to see his face red and puffy, her hand reaching out for his now, "I'm so sorry, I don't think I will ever be able to say it enough times to make it right, but I hope you know how much I truly mean it."

The tears that rolled down her cheeks itched as she tried to calm herself down enough to form a coherent sentence, "I'm so mad at you right now." "I know baby," his hand reached out to tuck her bangs out of the way of her tear-stained cheeks. "You disappeared, and I was at home worrying myself ill, I almost called the authorities!" she gave him a very much-deserved scolding, as she curled up into a ball, knees pulled up to her chest as she let out a tired breath, "I can't even be mad at you either cause you were scared!" "No no, be mad, I hurt you" "I can't cause I feel the same way, I don't know how to be a mom, I'm twenty-one," she cried as he wrapped his arms around her and hugged her into his chest.

"We are gonna be great parents," he said, cupping her face in his hands as she cried, "You are so kind baby, and our baby is gonna be the most loved baby ever, and we can finally get that house in Hoboken we've been looking into," he started listing off all of the things to look forward to with this baby on the way, "we may be young, but there is no one out there that can be as compassionate and as kind as you, and you're about to be the hottest mom that's ever walked this earth," she blushed a bright red as she leaned into him.

"You're gonna be a good dad too," she said once she calmed down a bit, her lips pressing a short kiss to his shoulder. He grinned as his fingers intertwined with hers, "you think?" "I know you will be," she took his hand and placed it on her stomach, he leaned forward to capture her lips in a slow kiss, a mixture of passion and emergency filled their kisses as her hand wrapped around the back of his neck. He smiled into the kiss and pulled away with a grin, "your boobs grew," he smirked like a horny teenage boy as she rolled her eyes. "You're like a twelve-year-old," she smiled as he nipped at her jaw before pressing a kiss to it. "Suck it up, I'm your baby daddy," she grimaced at the term before he kissed her once again.

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#jack hughes fic #jack hughes blurb #jack hughes imagine #jack hughes x reader #nj devils

[jesses-life-updates]

people tend to think trans people are special snowflakes who get pampered by society so here's being trans from the perspective of a transgender 14-year-old who has no adult support in his life. please boost this message to transphobes, it might not change their minds but it could at least make them consider the real children they're hurting.

• when I came out at 13 I was yelled at by my parents until I cried

• according to transphobes it's somehow my fault that I was born with a female body

• people at school ask me what my pronouns are as an insult and call me slurs and nobody does anything about it, not even teachers care

• I came out to these people I thought I could trust and their response was to push me out of their circle of friends and harass me, constantly calling me a lesbian even though I'm not even a girl

• life seems to have lost its colour and I can't remember the last time I felt actual strong emotions

• actual grown ass adults complain about trans people on the internet just for clout and argue with each other about whether or not we deserve rights, as if that isn't the most dehumanising shit

• I've been told that my feelings don't matter by a teacher at my school because "people in countries at war have it worse"

• the prime minister of my country was on national television spreading hate speech about my people and everyone is acting like he's a saint for it, completely ignoring the other bad things he's done for this country because "he hates trans people and that's good"

• I have to stand idly by while trans people my age are committing suicide and I am so scared I will end up adding to that statistic

• there's bad apples in every group of people and just because I'm trans I have to be grouped in with every bigoted/hateful trans person when I'm just trying to keep myself alive and I'm not bothering anyone

• I am too scared to bring up my queer identity around anyone because I don't want them to think I'm shoving it in their face, it might as well be a secret even though I've been out for over a year

• i sometimes forget that I'm not physically a boy but then it hits me again when I see how much taller/deep voiced my male peers are

• I had to resocialise myself as male and change so many things about my behaviour that it's constantly at the forefront of my mind

• my chest constantly feels tight, I can't breathe deeply, my breathing is shaky and I get random rib pains every few hours

• I'm told that my gender is a "protected characteristic" but adults are doing a piss poor job at protecting me, I feel like I'm in danger because of being queer

• people at school harassed me so much for being trans that I practically forced myself back into the closet by telling them I don't care what they refer to me as (I most definitely do care)

• my identity is so normal to me but it's not normal for anyone else, I'll be talking about a girl crush I have thinking what I'm saying is normal but someone chimes in with "oh are you a lesbian?" and it brings me back to the harsh reality that being queer isn't normal

• I used to feel so much pride as a queer kid but now I just hate everything about being queer and I wish so badly that I could be just like everyone else

• more and more laws are being put in place against my people and one day I might not even be able to get gender affirming treatment

• the chemical imbalance in my brain is considered a political stance rather than just a rare condition a group of people have that shouldn't be a big deal

• I, a 14 year old boy, am more mature about gender than ACTUAL GROWN ADULTS who go on PUBLIC TELEVISION TO COMPLAIN ABOUT ME WHEN I AM JUST TRYING TO EXIST IN PEACE

• I keep being hit with the realisation that I still need to wait four years just for the chance of merely beginning to transition, which will cost me thousands of pounds and probably take more than ten years to fully transition, whereas my peers are just handed it at birth

• trans people are seen by society as "annoying" and "shoving it down people's throats" and "looking for an excuse to be special" for some fucking reason

• I have to juggle all this shit with trying hard in school and balancing life, all while my brain is not even fully developed yet. my cognitive and emotional processing skills aren't even close to being developed but i have to deal with suicidal thoughts, media pushing the idea that I'm mentally ill, internalised transphobia, constant harassment, transphobia from almost every single person in my life, feeling like a fucking freak for a chemical imbalance in my brain, and yet I STILL have to deal with normal teenage things like feeling ugly or struggling in school, and further yet I CANT TALK TO A SINGLE ADULT ABOUT MY SITUATION BECAUSE NOBODY BELIEVES ME OR SUPPORTS ME

• the cherry on top: there is absolutely nothing I can do about my situation until I turn 18, my only option is to suck it up and deal with it until either get actual help or end up killing myself

if you're an adult who thinks trans people are groomers/snowflakes/annoying/criminal, think about how your actions are impacting youth who are just trying to stay alive. you are not protecting children by making us wait longer for treatment or shielding us from supportive outlets. grow the fuck up. you're an adult, act like it. find something else to do with your life than attack an astronomically small minority of people.

#transgender #transgender youth #lgbtq #lgbtqia #serious post

[jonlybonlyfromboldlygo]

I wish i was mentally ill like they are in movies and tv. Creative and funny and even if not fully supported, at least appreciated

It took me four hours to compete a fifteen minute task and I cried three times and I hate almost everythi-- no, everything. Everything about myself and my life and the world

I am alone in my head and folks? Things are bad in here.

#ramblin #bad brain day #love it when that happens #when i tried to flip my mattress and knocked half the things on my bureau to the floor there wasnt even a *laugh track* #and now i am crying on the toilet #so thats 4 times #awesome #good job brain #youre doing great

[myclippings]

The Four Loves - C.S. Lewis (Part 8)

23 December 2023 15:22:50 to 23:29:45

"The stereotyped ‘Don’t mention it’ here expresses what we really feel. The mark of perfect Friendship is not that help will be given when the pinch comes (of course it will) but that, having been given, it makes no difference at all. It was a distraction, an anomaly. It was a horrible waste of the time, always too short, that we had together. Perhaps we had only a couple of hours in which to talk and, God bless us, twenty minutes of it has had to be devoted to affairs!"

"(We all appear as dunces when feigning an interest in things we care nothing about.)"

"It was wonderful when we first met someone who cared for our favourite poet. What we had hardly understood before now took clear shape. What we had been half ashamed of we now freely acknowledged. But it was no less delightful when we first met someone who shared with us a secret evil. This too became far more palpable and explicit; of this too, we ceased to be ashamed. Even now, at whatever age, we all know the perilous charm of a shared hatred or grievance."

"Alone among unsympathetic companions, I hold certain views and standards timidly, half ashamed to avow them and half doubtful if they can after all be right. Put me back among my Friends and in half an hour—in ten minutes—these same views and standards become once more indisputable. The opinion of this little circle, while I am in it, outweighs that of a thousand outsiders: as Friendship strengthens, it will do this even when my Friends are far away. For we all wish to be judged by our peers, by the men ‘after our own heart’. Only they really know our mind and only they judge it by standards we fully acknowledge. Theirs is the praise we really covet and the blame we really dread."

"Men who have real Friends are less easy to manage or ‘get at’; harder for good Authorities to correct or for bad Authorities to corrupt."

"But the habit of ‘not giving a damn’ grows on a class. To discount the voice of the peasant where it really ought to be discounted makes it easier to discount his voice when he cries for justice or mercy. The partial deafness which is noble and necessary encourages the wholesale deafness which is arrogant and inhuman."

"Everyone who is not in the circle must be shown that he is not in it. Indeed the Friendship may be ‘about’ almost nothing except the fact that it excludes."

"For then it will seem to us that we—we four or five—have chosen one another, the insight of each finding the intrinsic beauty of the rest, like to like, a voluntary nobility; that we have ascended above the rest of mankind by our native powers. The other loves do not invite the same illusion. Affection obviously requires kinships or at least proximities which never depended on our own choice. And as for Eros, half the love songs and half the love poems in the world will tell you that the Beloved is your fate or destiny, no more your choice than a thunderbolt, for ‘it is not in our power to love or hate’. Cupid’s archery, genes—anything but ourselves. But in Friendship, being free of all that, we think we have chosen our peers."

"The Friendship is not a reward for our discrimination and good taste in finding one another out. It is the instrument by which God reveals to each the beauties of all the others. They are no greater than the beauties of a thousand other men; by Friendship God opens our eyes to them. They are, like all beauties, derived from Him, and then, in a good Friendship, increased by Him through the Friendship itself, so that it is His instrument for creating as well as for revealing. At this feast it is He who has spread the board and it is He who has chosen the guests. It is He, we may dare to hope, who sometimes does,…"

"For it is the very mark of Eros that when he is in us we had rather share unhappiness with the Beloved than be happy on any other terms. Even if the two lovers are mature and experienced people who know that broken hearts heal in the end and can clearly foresee that, if they once steeled themselves to go through the present agony of parting, they would almost certainly be happier ten years hence than marriage is at all likely to make them—even then, they would not part. To Eros all these calculations are irrelevant—just as the coolly brutal judgment of Lucretius is irrelevant to Venus. Even when it becomes clear beyond all evasion that marriage with the Beloved cannot possibly lead to happiness—when it cannot even profess to offer any other life than that of tending an incurable invalid, of hopeless poverty, of exile, or of disgrace—Eros never hesitates to say, ‘Better this than parting. Better to be miserable with her than happy without her. Let our hearts break provided they break together.’ If the voice within us does not say this, it is not the voice of Eros." 11."When this expectation is disappointed they throw the blame on Eros or, more usually, on their partners. In reality, however, Eros, having made his gigantic promise and shown you in glimpses what its performance would be like, has ‘done his stuff’. He, like a godparent, makes the vows; it is we who must keep them. It is we who must labour to bring our daily life into even closer accordance with what the glimpses have revealed. We must do the works of Eros when Eros is not present. This all good lovers know, though those who are not reflective or articulate will be able to express it only in a few conventional phrases about ‘taking the rough along with the smooth’, not ‘expecting too much’, having ‘a little common sense’, and the like. And all good Christian lovers know that this programme, modest as it sounds, will not be carried out except by humility, charity, and divine grace; that it is indeed the whole Christian life seen from one particular angle."

"If you want to see the difference between its contribution and the gardener’s, put the commonest weed it grows side by side with his hoes, rakes, shears, and packet of weed killer; you have put beauty, energy, and fecundity beside dead, sterile things. Just so, our ‘decency and common sense’ show grey and deathlike beside the geniality of love."

"It is dangerous to press upon a man the duty of getting beyond earthly love when his real difficulty lies in getting so far. And it is no doubt easy enough to love the fellow-creature less and to imagine that this is happening because we are learning to love God more, when the real reason may be quite different. We may be only ‘mistaking the decays of nature for the increase of Grace’."

"The rebellious slogan ‘All for love’ is really love’s death warrant (date of execution, for the moment, left blank)."

"The danger of loving our fellow-creatures too little was less present to their minds than that of loving them idolatrously.

"The danger of loving our fellow-creatures too little was less present to their minds than that of loving them idolatrously."

"This is what comes, he says, of giving one’s heart to anything but God. All human beings pass away. Do not let your happiness depend on something you may lose. If love is to be a blessing, not a misery, it must be for the only Beloved who will never pass away."

"To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket—safe, dark, motionless, airless—it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. The alternative to tragedy, or at least to the risk of tragedy, is damnation. The only place outside Heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers and perturbations of love is Hell."

"We shall draw nearer to God, not by trying to avoid the sufferings inherent in all loves, but by accepting them and offering them to Him; throwing away all defensive armour. If our hearts need to be broken, and if He chooses this as the way in which they should break, so be it."

"It is much to be wished—at least I think so—that we all, at all times, could. We must pray that this gift should be given us."

"Otherwise we shall trouble some who are very much on the right road but alarmed because they cannot feel towards God so warm a sensible emotion as they feel for the earthly Beloved. It is much to be wished—at least I think so—that we all, at all times, could. We must pray that this gift should be given us. But the question whether we are loving God or the earthly Beloved ‘more’ is not, so far as concerns our Christian duty, a question about the comparative intensity of two feelings. The real question is, which (when the alternative comes) do you serve, or choose, or put first? To which claim does your will, in the last resort, yield?"

"We cannot see light, though by light we can see things."

"But Divine Gift-love in the man enables him to love what is not naturally lovable; lepers, criminals, enemies, morons, the sulky, the superior, and the sneering. Finally, by a high paradox, God enables men to have a Gift-love towards Himself. There is of course a sense in which no one can give to God anything which is not already His; and if it is already His, what have you given? But since it is only too obvious that we can withhold ourselves, our wills and hearts, from God, we can, in that sense, also give them."

"What is His by right and would not exist for a moment if it ceased to be His (as the song is the singer’s), He has nevertheless made ours in such a way that we can freely offer it back to Him."

"No sooner do we believe that God loves us than there is an impulse to believe that He does so, not because He is Love, but because we are intrinsically lovable."

"But God also transforms our Need-love for one another, and it requires equal transformation. In reality we all need at times, some of us at most times, that Charity from others which, being Love Himself in them, loves the unlovable. But this, though a sort of love we need, is not the sort we want. We want to be loved for our cleverness, beauty, generosity, fairness, usefulness. The first hint that anyone is offering us the highest love of all is a terrible shock. This is so well recognised that spiteful people will pretend to be loving us with Charity precisely because they know that it will wound us."

"In such a case to receive is harder and perhaps more blessed than to give. But what the extreme example illustrates is universal. We are all receiving Charity. There is something in each of us that cannot be naturally loved. It is no one’s fault if they do not so love it. Only the lovable can be naturally loved. You might as well ask people to like the taste of rotten bread or the sound of a mechanical drill. We can be forgiven, and pitied, and loved in spite of it, with Charity; no other way. All who have good parents, wives, husbands, or children, may be sure that at some times—and perhaps at all times in respect of some one particular trait or habit—they are receiving charity, are loved not because they are lovable but because Love Himself is in those who love them. Thus God, admitted to the human heart, transforms not only Gift-love but Need-love; not only our Need-love of Him, but our Need-love of one another."

"In such a case the Divine Love does not substitute itself for the natural—as if we had to throw away our silver to make room for the gold. The natural loves are summoned to become modes of Charity while also remaining the natural loves they were."

"we get at once a sharp warning that there is something wrong. The moment we attempt to use our faith in the other world for this purpose, that faith weakens. The moments in my life when it was really strong have all been moments when God Himself was central in my thoughts. Believing in Him, I could then believe in Heaven as a corollary. But the reverse process—believing first in reunion with the Beloved, and then, for the sake of that reunion, believing in Heaven, and finally, for the sake of Heaven, believing in God—this will not work. One can of course imagine things. But a self-critical person will soon be increasingly aware that the imagination at work is his own; he knows he is only weaving a fantasy."

"We find thus by experience that there is no good applying to Heaven for earthly comfort. Heaven can give heavenly comfort; no other kind. And earth cannot give earthly comfort either. There is no earthly comfort in the long run."

#c.s. lewis

[spinningintheshadows]

Memories That Fade Like Photographs

Oops I made myself cry so bring tissues to this one. Warnings: mentions of child loss, panic attacks, john b being a supportive big brother even if it just by 17 minutes, jj still not talking about his feelings until he absolutely has to.

“Y/N you should really be asleep right now”

“I can’t sleep, J. Nerves.”

“You should at least try. This is the last time you go to bed pregnant”

“That’s why I can’t sleep”

You’re in tears, really

It’s 1:30 in the morning and you have to be at the hospital at 8:30 to deliver your first child, a son.

Or at least the first child you would raise

JJ has just come through the front door of your shared home after working his last shift for at least three weeks.

And he’s found you in tears on your sofa.

Of course, he was expecting the tears because your brother had left three hours ago and called him on the drive across town.

He could still remember the conversation

“JJ, I’m just calling to let you know I just left your house and Y/N is in tears and I expect she will be when you get home.”

“Shes 41 weeks pregnant, JB, she’s always crying.”

“I think we both know why she’s crying tonight JJ. She’s scared. For the last 41 weeks she’s been able to pretend like everything is fine but in reality she’s scared that you set that nursery up for nothing. Mentally, she’s 17 years old again and she’s scared she’s not going to bring this one home too.”

“Everything is fine, JB.”

“and everything was fine until it wasn’t last time. She’s going to be scared and emotional until she physically has him in her arms.”

JJ sighed, sitting down on the couch beside you taking you into his arms.

He placed his hand on your swollen middle, feeling your son kick.

“Do you feel that Y/N? Just keep remembering that as long as he’s moving like that, he’s okay. You’re okay.”

“But what if everything’s not okay, J”

“That’s why we’re going to have him tomorrow, baby girl. By 9:30 am we are going to be parents to a healthy baby boy. I promise you everything is going to be okay.”

“I’m scared, J”

“I know you are. You have every right to be scared, but we aren’t 17 and 18 anymore. We aren’t two kids who have only been dating 11 months. We’re 23 and 24, we’ve been married for four years. We’re stronger than we’ve ever been. He’s not Emma, he’s gonna be okay. He’s a Maybank, and we’re fighters”

“Emma was a Maybank too, JJ.”

“And I fully believe she fought to be here until the very end. Cmon, let’s go to bed baby”

He helps you stand up, guiding you to your bedroom.

Although neither of you sleep that night

Not with you scared, and him still trying to reassure you that he was okay.

He’d never admit it but he was equally as terrified.

Losing your daughter had almost killed him.

It basically ended your relationship for nearly a year.

As much as he tried to be the positive happy husband, he’d gone into every appointment with you holding his breath.

There had been many mornings he’d gone into work after not sleeping from holding you while you cried.

But he never showed you when he cried about it.

Showing emotions and talking about his feelings were not something he did regularly, so most of his crying spells were in the car on the drive to or from work.

“J, I need you to help me up. I have to pee”

“Of course Baby”

You managed to waddle to the bathroom but when you got up you yelled for JJ.

“You okay Baby?”

“No, John James, I am not okay!”

“What’s going on?”

You looked at him with tears in your eyes.

“My water broke, J”

“Oh. Okay, let’s get you changed and we’ll go okay?”

“I’m not ready.”

“Ready or not he was coming today anyway, it’s just on his terms now”

By the time you got to the hospital, JJ was sure you were having a full blown panic attack

And as much as he hated to admit it, there was only one person who was going to be able to talk you down, so while they took you to triage, he dialed the number on his phone.

“JJ it is four am”

“And your twin sister is in labor and having a panic attack, JB. We both know you’re the only one who’s gonna talk her down so I need you to not only be my best friend right now, I need you to go into big brother mode, even if it is only by 17 minutes”

“I’m on my way.”

By the time John B got there, you had calmed your breathing down but JJ could still see the panic in your eyes.

He sat, holding your hand on one side and JB sat beside you on the other holding your other hand.

“Why are you here, JB?”

“Because I promised you that you’d never have to go through this alone, Y/N. I’m your older brother. I'm always going to be here.”

“You know my husband is right here right?”

“Yes and I know your husband is the one who called me forty five minutes ago and said my baby sister was in labor and having a panic attack and we both know I’m the only one who could talk you down, Y/N”

“I’m really scared”

“I know you are, but it sounds like you’re going to be a mom within the hour and as soon as you lay eyes on him, all that fear is going to be replaced with adoration for this tiny human you’ve made with the love of your life. I know, I have the experience.”

You half smile at your brother as he talks about your niece, who was sleeping in your old bedroom at the Chateau.

Of course, like always, your brother was right.

The moment that you heard your son cry for the first time, your tears turned from scared tears to happy tears.

The moment the nurse handed him to JJ, you saw your husband cry for the first time since he was 18.

It was daylight by the time John B came back to the hospital, having to get his daughter off to preschool for the day.

He found JJ walking around your hospital room with your son in his arms while you slept.

“He’s here. He’s perfect”

“Never thought I’d say this but you look really good with a baby in your arms, JJ”

“I don’t think I’ve put him down other than to let Y/N feed him.”

“I can’t believe there’s a human on this earth that is half my sister, half my best friend”

“Here. I’m pleased to introduce you to your almost 9 pound nephew, Ezra Booker Maybank. I am 100% under the assumption that his middle name is some weird twin thing”

“It’s not weird. We promised each other when we were kids we would name our children after each other. Harlow’s middle name is y/m/n. It’s cute, I promise.”

JJ obviously took a picture of his best friend with nephew and made sure to send it to him.

When you woke up, sore and still exhausted, John B was the only one in the room, holding your son on his lap with his head in his hands.

“Hi JB.”

“You made a cute kid, Y/N. I know that Harlow was smaller than him but I can’t even remember her being this tiny. And he’s got so much hair.”

“He’s a blondie, gonna look like his dad. Where is JJ anyway?”

“He ran home to get something. Said it was a surprise for you.”

“Oh.”

“Do you want him?”

“Yeah, give me my son.”

You’re nursing when JJ comes back in the room.

“Hi baby.”

“You’re back.”

“I got something for you”

“Oh?”

“I know you noticed a few weeks ago that Emma had been moved and that’s because I took her to the mainland with me.”

“What are you talking about, J?”

“JB found a woman on the mainland that makes memorial jewelry with ashes. I had her make us new wedding bands.”

“What?”

Out of his pocket he pulled a small velvet box and sat beside you on the bed opening it so you could see.

“So the ring is black, but the grey silvery line? That’s our daughter. I know I don’t talk about my emotions very often, but losing her almost killed me too, y’know. Everything was fine one second and she was ripped away from us the next. I was eighteen, it was my first, my only serious relationship. I know we didn’t plan for her, but I was so excited to be a dad and until today, I didn’t get the chance. I wanted something that meant I would have her all day everyday. That we would have her all day everyday.”

“JJ. I don’t know what to say. This is the most thoughtful thing you’ve ever got for me. It must have been so expensive though”

Tears were falling again.

You weren’t sure how exactly your crazy ass first boyfriend had become such a thoughtful, sweet husband.

All you really knew is that you were 100% undoubtedly in love with him.

“They weren’t cheap, but it was worth it.”

“I love it.”

“I love you, I love him.”

“We did make a pretty cute kid huh.”

“No, we made pretty cute kids. Emma was beautiful just like her Mama”

“I’ve been a disaster this whole pregnancy.”

“Y/N you swore off ever getting pregnant again four years ago when Sarah found out about Harlow. And then nine months ago, I walk in from work to you having a panic attack in our bathroom because of an overpriced piece of plastic. I put on the strong face for you because you needed to be a disaster. You went from being twenty two to suddenly being seventeen again and being told our daughter isn’t breathing moments after she’s born. And that was your fear this entire pregnancy, that we were going to get to this point and be told those words again. But we didn’t, baby. We’re sitting here, holding our son and he’s healthy and breathing and we get to take him home, and watch him grow up.”

“Hey J?”

“Hmm?”

“You’re cute when you rant.”

“Shut up.”

“I hope he’s just like you.”

“Maybe without the fighting though. I don’t care how hyperactive he is, just let’s not having get suspended every couple months”

“That’s the dream.”

“I love you”

“I love you more, J.”

#Vix's 400 Follower Celebration!! #JJ Maybank #jj maybank x routledge!reader #jj maybank x reader #jj maybank headcannon #jj maybank fic #jj maybank blurb #jj maybank imagine #outer banks #outer banks headcannon #outer banks blurb #outer banks fic #outer banks imagine #obx

[toomanystoriessolittletime]

Distraction

Summary: Meeting a single Dad on the plane back to the states was maybe just the distraction you needed to get over your fear of flying.

Pairing: Frankie Morales x F!reader

Wordcount: 3k

Warnings: reader is afraid of flying, one panic attack

A/N: First time writing for Frankie. I don’t know about fear of flying or about babies, so of course I decided to write about both 🙈 Let me know if you like it 😂

Masterlist

taglist in reblog

Maybe it was time to find a new job. A job that didn’t require traveling to other continents at least once a year. You could be a barista. Or… any work that would require you staying on the ground where you belonged. Not in a tiny capsule that traveled way too fast and way too high.

You felt anxious throughout the whole day when you knew you had to go on a plane. It wasn’t even the height you were scared of. You couldn’t describe it. You always were very independent. Maybe it was the fact that you had to trust a stranger not to fuck up and make the plane crash. You didn’t know who would be the pilot. Of course, you knew that they were all trained professionals, they have to be but… ugh. Overthinking. You were overthinking again. Handing the stewardess your boarding pass she smiled kindly at you and you tried to smile back before you sighed and slowly walked down towards the plane.

As soon as your nose smelled the engine (yes you could smell it) you felt like your stomach wouldn’t make it. Closing your eyes you breathed in deep, trying to remember that millions of people did this every day. Opening your eyes you looked at the plane door where a man was just climbing in, a baseball cap on his head. He was carrying a baby that was sleeping on his shoulder as if nothing else mattered. You smiled softly. If a baby could do it, you could too.

Nope. No you couldn’t.

You felt your throat getting dryer the further you walked into the plane in search of your seat. You never sat at the window, always in the middle. You read that it was more safe once. When you arrived in the row you would be sitting you couldn’t help but smile, finding the man with the baby sitting on the window seat, the baby carrier in the middle seat. He looked up and you were met with warm brown eyes. His hand was on the baby’s back, almost covering it entirely. He gave you a tired smile and you nodded.

“Hi,” you whispered, not wanting to wake the baby.

“Hey,” he nodded quietly. You took your coat off, putting it in the cabinet over the seat, and sat down. You intended to work on your way back to the states so you brought your laptop. Pushing your bag under your seat you got out your phone, putting it in flight mode before you secured the seat belt. People were still coming into the plane and you felt yourself getting more nervous. Sucking your bottom lip in, you took out the card with the safety instructions in front of your seat, reading it carefully. Your assigned security exit was just two rows behind that was good to know. You were unaware of the man sitting two seats next to you watching you. You crossed your legs, your sweaty hands on your thigh when they closed the doors. You turned your head as you heard the man next to you mumble in Spanish and noticed that the baby had woken up and was now looking at you with big eyes. She was still lying against the man’s chest, her head just under his chin, his lips kissing her head. You looked at him then, noticing how attractive he was, his eyes closed as he gently rubbed circles on the baby’s back. His base cap sat deep on his head, dark wild curls underneath that peaked out. You never thought a mustache could be attractive but maybe he was the exception.

People were finally settled in their seats and you felt the plane move as the announcement from the boarding crew came for the safety instructions. You heard a tiny whimper and looked at the man. The baby was clearly not happy with the loud voices from the speaker. You wondered why he was alone on a plane on a seven-hour flight back to the states with a baby that couldn’t be much older than maybe four months. A noise made you jump and he looked at you.

“Sorry,” you mumbled embarrassed.

“First flight?” he asked. You shook your head.

“I wish it was. That wouldn’t make me being scared so embarrassing,” you sighed, your eyes wandering between him and the baby on his chest. He smiled a little.

“You can’t choose your fears,” he shrugged. He was right you couldn’t.

“I wish I could though. I feel like I’m gonna faint every time I have to fly.”

He looked at you before he began to open a bag that was laying in the baby carrier.

“You probably already heard all kinds of solutions for going over your fear but as a pilot let me assure you, that it’s perfectly safe.” He seemed to have found what he was searching for, a baby bottle with milk in his hands.

“You’re a pilot?” you asked fascinated.

“Was. Military. But can’t with this one needing me around,” he kissed the baby’s head.

You smiled. “She’s adorable.”

“She’s my whole world,” he put her in the crook of his left arm, his right hand checking the bottle.

“Gotta make sure the entire plane doesn’t hate me for bringing you on here, baby girl,” he said quietly. She looked up at him with big eyes, her little arms going up as he brought the bottle in her line of view and you chuckled. He looked at you, giving you a soft smile.

“It’s our second flight but she’s a trooper,” he explained. “Feeding her during take-off and landing helps with the ear pressure,” he explained.

“Are we taking off already?” you asked, feeling the nervous flutter inside your belly.

“I can talk you through it, if you want to?” he offered as he brought the bottle down and the baby began to suck eagerly just when the plane seemed to be in starting position.

“I don’t want to bother you,” you shook your head.

“I wouldn’t have offered, if it would bother me,” there it was again, that shy smile that made your heart seem to stop for a second.

“Okay. Thank you…”

“Frankie,” he offered.

“Thank you, Frankie,” you smiled.

You still felt nervous after an hour in the air but now you weren’t sure if it was the flight or the man sitting next to you. Finding an attractive and, as you found out, single Dad that looked at his baby girl like it was his whole world, didn’t help to settle your nerves or ovaries. But you would take this kind of nervousness in a heart beat instead of your fear of flying. He had talked you through every little step on what the pilot would be doing. It may vary from flying a helicopter as he did, but the steps were the same. He had squeezed your hand that was grabbing the seat like a lifeline an hour ago. You swore you could still feel the warmth of his hand.

Sofia, the 3 ½-month-old girl that was his daughter was now laying in the baby carrier in the middle seat, her hand squeezing your finger as she slept. Every thought of working on your project was gone as you looked down at the sleeping baby.

“She’s got a pretty hard grasp,” you said looking down at her.

“Yeah. She’s so big already. I can’t believe it,” Frankie said. You looked up, seeing him lift his hat, his hand running through his hair before he put his cap back on. You smiled at him.

“What brought you over here?” you asked. He made a face.

“One of my military friends was wounded.”

“Oh. Is he okay?”

“Yeah, he’s fine. Thank you for asking.”

“I wish I had friends like that. Flying for me over the globe in a heartbeat,” you sighed, trying to overplay the sadness in your face.

“Oh I’m sure you have someone,” he mused.

“I used to. But I moved across the country after my father died and I never really got settled in where I live now if that makes sense?”

“Well, why don’t you hang out with me… uh us?” Frankie suggested. You looked up at him.

“Careful with an offer like that. I might just say yes to hang out with Sofia,” you teased. As if she could hear you, she squeezed your finger and you just about melted.

“She’s great to hang out with, I’ll give her that,” Frankie said “But can she hold an hour-long conversation with a beautiful woman?”

You looked up then, seeing him look at you and you felt your cheeks getting warm.

“Guess I’ll have to talk to you until she can, huh?” you teased.

“Guess so,” he shrugged, a small smirk on his lips.

Frankie had just left to use the bathroom, leaving Sofia under your watchful eyes when her eyes blinked open. She seemed to look for her Dad until she looked at you. You could see her small lips pouting, her face frowning and your heart broke before she had even whimpered for the first time. Carefully you took her out of the baby carrier, hoping Frankie would be okay with you taking her out and took her into your arms. She was fully crying now.

“Shh…” you mumbled, propping her up so she was lying in the crook of your arm.

“Dad’s gonna be here any minute now, sweet Sofia,” you said soothingly. She didn’t stop. Sighing you changed so she was with her head on your shoulder as you got up from your seat. Maybe taking a little walk with her would help. You run your hand over her back like you had seen Frankie did before as you walked down the aisle and her cries got quieter until they stopped when you were close to the cockpit.

“There you go. You just wanted to see something different, huh, baby girl?” you asked whispering soothingly.

“Where’s your papa? What’s taking him so long?” you ask, beginning to walk back towards the seat. Frankie’s wasn’t back so you took Sofia down to the other side of the plane. You giggled as you found Sofia grab your hair and pulling lightly.

“Hey… Do you do that with your Dad’s hair too?” you asked, knowing you wouldn’t get an answer. You pulled her from your shoulder and she looked at you with big eyes as you put her in your arm so she could look up at you. Passing an older lady you smiled.

“She looks just like you,” the woman smiled softly as she looked down at Sofia who was still looking at you. You felt your cheeks getting warm again.

“Oh... I’m not…” you began but she only nodded at you and walked back to her seat. Confused you walked further until you saw Frankie walking towards you. He had an unreadable expression on his face as he looked at you and you hoped you didn’t overstep.

“I’m sorry. She was crying and…”

“She likes you,” he said, his hand brushing over her cheek and she smiled, clearly noticing her Dad was back.

“You want her back?” you ask, secretly hoping he didn’t.

“I think she looks very comfortable where she is,” he said. You looked up, finding him looking at you. He was taller than you but he was close. So close. You didn’t notice the spot on his jaw that was beard free before and you found yourself wanting to kiss him there. Kiss him everywhere. You gulped, looking down again.

“Let’s get back to our seat, huh, little lady?” you asked and walked back.

Sofia was sleeping again and you were trying to read your book. And not think about the man sitting two seats next to you. You looked at him from the side and found him always already looking at you. You felt like a teenager. You had to smile to yourself, thinking that must have been the longest date you had ever been on. You chuckled to yourself which made Frankie look at you, an eyebrow raised. You just shook your head embarrassed.

“I was thinking…” he began.

“Yes?” you asked.

“Can I invite you for a drink?”

You blinked at him, sucking your bottom lip in. You were about to answer when the whole plane shook with a turbulence and you sucked your breath in harshly. For a moment you had forgotten where you were.

“Shit…” you whispered to yourself, leaning with your head against the seat, closing your eyes, while your fingernails grabbed into the seat. The plane shook again and you breathed in and out to control your rising panic.

“Hey…” you felt someone grab your hand. You were too scared to open your eyes.

“It’s just some minor turbulence. We gonna be out of it in no time,” it was Frankie. He felt how your hand was shaking and didn’t let go.

“Just breathe. Can you open your eyes for me?” he asked. You shook your head, squeezing his hand harder.

“I know you can, look at me Hermosa,” you could sense that he was closer. Turning your head towards his side you opened your eyes.

“There you are, now breathe with me,” he looked at you and you got lost in his eyes as he breathed with you and you felt yourself calm down.

“That’s better. You made it,” he smiled. He was still holding your hand.

“Thank you, Frankie,” you said quietly. He leaned down, kissing the back of your hand he was still holding and you shivered when his lips connected with your skin.

“You’re very welcome,” he mumbled.

He didn’t let your hand go until Sofia woke up and demanded very loudly for her bottle.

It was you who gave Sofia her bottle as the plane landed and it made you forget about your fear of flying. Frankie watched you the whole time and it made your heart flutter. You wanted this. Only 7 hours ago you were on another continent and alone and now you had the baby of a man you met on a plane in your arms you didn’t want to let go.

You never even thought about children. There never was someone you could imagine having children with. It was always you. Just you.

But Frankie had shown you more attention in the last hours than any other person ever since your father died. You were lonely, you knew that. But you had made your peace with it. You were enough. But maybe you didn’t have to be just enough. Maybe you wanted to be more. Maybe Frankie wanted to be more.

The plane stopped and you smiled sadly down at Sofia in your arms. Slowly you put her in the baby carrier and she wasn’t happy about it. You almost cried.

“Come on you were so good the whole time…” Frankie whined and you giggled. He looked at you with a playful pout.

“I think she misses you already,” he said and you sighed.

“I’ll miss her too,” you smiled down at her, your hand brushing over her head and she took hold of one of your fingers again, making you chuckle.

You helped let Frankie out to get his stuff first, staying seated with Sofia. He gave you your coat and you reached for your bag under the seat before you got out of your seat. He had a backpack on and reached for the baby carrier. You were the last people on the plane. You waited until he had everything before you slowly walked towards the exit of the plane. Thanking the stewardess who was standing near the cockpit with a smile you got out of the plane, thankful to finally be on solid ground. You were about to turn around to look where Frankie was when you felt him grab your hand, squeezing it once. There it was, the nervous flutter in your belly again as you looked up at him and saw his small smile.

You were standing together waiting for your suitcase. Frankie had put Sofia in her stroller where she was sleeping peacefully. He already had his suitcase and was waiting for you.

“So…” you began, looking at him. He turned, now facing you fully.

“So?” he asked, a teasing smile on his lips.

“I was wondering about that drink you offered?” you asked. He nodded.

“How would you feel about dinner on Saturday? I’ll come and visit you in the big city?” he smiled. You felt your heart almost jumping out of your chest. You couldn’t wait.

“What about Sofia?” you asked.

“My friend can watch her. He owes me and… I want to be alone with you,” he stepped closer and you sucked your bottom lip in as you looked up.

“It’s only an hour drive, please say yes…” he whispered.

“Yes,” you breathed.

“Great. You have to get a table I have no idea what’s good over there. I’m more of a country guy…” he brought his hand up, cupping your cheek and you leaned into his touch.

“How about I cook dinner?” you offered, “So we truly are alone,” you clarified.

He leaned down, his lips brushing over yours softly and you closed your eyes, your hand clutching his soft shirt. He leaned his forehead against yours when he parted from your lips, breathing deeply.

“Yeah. Alone. I like to be alone with you,” he whispered, his nose brushing over yours. You nodded before you took a step back.

“Saturday?” you asked as you walked out.

“Saturday,” he replied and kissed you again.

#my writing #frankie morales #francisco morales #frankie morales x reader #francisco morales x reader #frankie catfish morales #Pedro pascal #fanfic #fanfiction #fan fic

[smutty-ki113r]

🎠Laughing Jack🎠|| Carousel

Fluff one-shot x gn!reader— only warning is angst (2.6k)

Inspired by: Melanie Martinez

After months of endless nagging you finally convinced Laughing Jack to let you visit his amusement park. He had claimed it was too scary and you would get creeped out but you weren’t one to take no for an answer.

Giving you a piece of candy so the trans-dementional trip wouldn’t be too hard on you. Tasting the sour lemon taffy he gave you and making a tense face as the flavor pulled at your taste buds and stuck to your teeth.

Your head getting dizzy as your surroundings warped and his room became red and white vertical stripes. Blinking a couple times as he leaned into your face, “are you alright?”

“I’m fine!” You told him, almost falling back at how close he was. As soon as your perception adjusted you looked for the exit to the tent you were inside. “Onward!” You said excited, marching comedically to the entrance flap.

“This isn’t exactly the safest place”, he called from behind, catching up with ease because his legs were so long. “You need to stay close to me at all times” you smiled at him, it’s not like you were complaining, “got that?”

Giving him a keen nod you stepped out of the grand tent. Squinting at the sky, which was tainted a dusty gray, swirly clouds amber of scattered around in the background. The carnival was beautifully revolting, with littered attractions as far as the eye could see.

The place looked somewhat abandoned, if you get past the faint cries of children, from their souls stored in toys. Rides that once colored a vibrant red had paint chipped, specks of dull metal flaked over the bars.

Game stands broken down and leaning unsteadily, disturbing toys with eyes and limbs missing hanging from the top. It looked like it might fall down at any minute, but you couldn’t help but notice the newer looking boxes of supplies lying around next to the stands.

Fairy lights hung from the tilted signs, decorating the food court. A fresh trail had been made between the rides.

It warmed your heart that he had made subtle efforts to fix the place up, he certainly didn’t think you would notice.

Looking back at his nervous smile, Jack was terrified you would hate the place. You thought all but the opposite, giving him a big grin. Your expression relaxed him, assuring him that you wouldn’t think he was a freak and leave. His whole demeanor shifting, making him more comfortable and even enthusiastic.

Straightening out and giving you jazz hands, “what are you waiting for?” putting one hand on his hip to motion you to the park with the other “lets go have fun!”

Following behind you with a giggle as you approached the carnival games. The ring toss looking somewhat appealing in between the other activities, so you told him you wanted to play.

“Basically you get 5 rings, if you get at least 3 in the pins you win a prize” he explained.

“Alright alright lemme try” you waved him off, snatching the rings and giving one a toss. It missed, you brushed it off. The second one made it in and Jack gave a little cheer, it still wasn’t enough.

Hyperfocusing on the pin in the middle make a soft throw upward, the edge hitting the top of the pin and falling to the side. You gave a groan, calculating your last two throws.

Your forth throw made the pin to the side, and you only had one more try left. Aiming for another pin at the side to release, the ring clanging against it and falling to the floor.

You went to look at Jack with a frown but he wore a happy expression, “you won!” He exclaimed. Confused you turned back, finding the ring you had just tossed around the last pin. You were completely certain you had missed it, racking your mind for an explanation as jack handed you a small purple bunny that was missing an arm.

Realizing that Jack had manipulating the game so you could win, throwing him a knowing glance. He just happened to be looking away, whistling guiltily.

Squeezing the bunny you moved onto the next game, it was ballon dart toss. The stand had pale red and black balloons scattered across a board. Excitement was written all over his face, you cocked an eyebrow in question.

“It’s a two person game!” He said, “whoever pops more balloons wins!”

He handed you four darts and kept four for himself, “you can go first” he motioned with a grin. Pacing the dart in two fingers a couple times before throwing at a balloon. Giving a groan when you missed and waiting for him to go.

Being as skilled as he was he managed to land one in a bullseye. “Oh it’s on” you dared, getting one point yourself. LJ got the second one too, staring at you intensely as you evened out the score.

Giving him a small smile as the dart broke the surface of the balloon with a sharp noise “pop goes the weasel right?” You laughed, referring to his famous song.

He looked at you almost in shock, taken aback by your joke. Shaking himself into reality he broke out in a light blush, a part of him touched, as if you were accepting him for who he was.

Too distracted by your eyes on him to play the game with concentration. Missing the third one with a growl he waited for you to take your turn, which you lost. It was the last point and Jack was a shoe in, so obviously he took the victory.

You were happy for him, passing along a “good job!” as he retrieved the big brown teddy bear that was half his size, and all of yours. It was missing an eye, thin stands of makeshift fur pulled out and a silky red bow around it’s neck.

“Here” he said, dangling it in front of you.

“For me?” You asked, “but you won”, trying to look up at him but the bear blocked most of your view, only letting you see above his nose.

“Just take it” he practically pushed it into you, making you blow out an oof.

Holding it to the side at the torso with one hand you broke out in a grin “thank you for the plushie” you said, hugging him from the side and squeezing his torso “but I want you to be my teddy” you laughed. He looked incredibly flustered, frozen as you broke away.

“You’re big and tall” you tippy toed up to give his shoulder pad feathers a ruffle “and fluffy”

The man looked like he was about to faint so you decided to knock it off, laughing and telling him you wanted to go on the carousel next. Quickly, LJ happily led you too it, skipping in front of you (mostly to hide his blush).

Standing at the controls to cue a round, watching you walk around to find a pretty horse. Given, all of them had dark spots and chipped paint, but they worked all the same. Leaving the bear on another horse and climbing onto a white one that had a yellow saddle, intricate lacy designs patterned on the sides. Royal blue reigns across it’s chest and a lion on a crest.

It was beautiful, and you traced your fingers on the drawing. It must have been stunning, but the weathering of time and agony had gotten to it. A painful reminder of what was, a mere reflection of the chipping away of a joyful being.

Prying away from your thoughts as you felt the vibrations of Jack stepping onto the walkway- with one of his big smiles. Even after everything, he still wore a smile. It made you want to tear up, he really needed all the love he could get.

He was too tall to get on a horse, so he just stood by you. His big hand gracing the golden pole and holding on, watching as you peeked up at him. Even though his eyes were constantly bright he displayed something…deeper. It was a sort of shine, a sparkle if you will, luminosity glazed over in such a way that one can only get lost in its vastness.

The looped music in the background was secondary as you rose up and down with the horse, giving Jack a little smile and thanking him for bringing you here. “I’m having a lot of fun with you” you noted.

“Well of course you are! It’s a carnival” he said with joy.

“No I mean with you” you clarified “you’re pretty great Jack”. This time he didn’t avoid your gaze, his mouth open slightly, not knowing how to react to the sincerity of the compliment.

The ride slowly came to a stop, and you were feeling slightly tingly. Maybe it was the air, or the loss of focus. “How about a roller coaster?” You dared, to which he gave a tense face.

“Those are pretty broken, you’ll probably die riding one and that’s not what we want” he said, stepping off the carousel. “How about some cotton candy instead?”

You nodded your head vigorously, following him in the pursuit for the fairy floss, the bear falling behind forgotten. Passing by more unused rides that had long past rusted and a house of mirrors to get to the food court.

Jack humming happily as he dipped a paper cone into the bowl of revolving fibers of sugar. Whipping up a swirly pink and blue cotton candy and handing it to you with a proud smile.

He went to make another treat until you spoke, “I’m not that hungry so we can share” you proposed. “If you want”

“Are you sure?” He asked, concerned that you didn’t have much appetite. “Do you want some candy or maybe a funnel cake?”

You shook him off, taking a bite out of the cloud-like dessert. It was absolutely delicious, honeyed and saccharine on your tongue in a blend of flavor you had never tasted had before.

Soft as it disintegrated onto your mouth, leaving behind a remanence of something too sweet. Bringing it up to Jack, who was so tall you had to extend your arm fully to get it to his mouth.

He simply laughed at your struggle, taking a bite before giving you a thin smile and taking it from your hand. Sitting down at a bench so that you could both share comfortably.

By the time the candy had finished you noticed little bits of the silky texture stuck on his nose. Painfully stifling a laugh you turned away.

“What’s so funny?” He asked with a genuine smile.

When you didn’t answer his tone changed, “what’s so funny huh?” he sounded a bit angered.

Hiccuping through your laughter you faced him, leaning in real close to his face, enough so that you could feel the heat emanating from it; taking a bite of the pink woven candy on his nose and holding it in your teeth.

His face went red at the sight, embarrassed that he had cotton candy on his nose. Well, that and for a moment he thought you were going to kiss him.

Noticing your hands were all sticky you asked him if there was a sink somewhere. After both of you washed your hands you sat back down at the bench.

The sky was going dark, the poofs of dusty cloud fading in with the night but still managing to remain visible. You heard a whirr as Jack turned on all the rides at the carnival, lighting the whole thing up.

You sat in awe, a mere spectator in the empty yet live amusement park. Admiring the music that added to the ambiance, watching Jack approach you.

“Wanna take a walk?” He asked, but there was something…off. LJ seemed nervous as you got up and walked next to him.

He had been thinking about it for a while now, probably even before he brought you to the carnival. Even though he had washed the gooey candy from his hands they were still sticky, but it was from sweat. Giving you side glances as you paced the trail with him.

Debating to himself whether or not he should do it, if you would hate him for it. Telling himself that he would regret it if he didn’t, but thinking about the potential negative reactions you could give.

Passing the carousel once again as you noticed the usually loud and happy clown was silent, lost in thought as he stared into the distance, his lips forming a tensing line.

Wondering if he was ok, but brining up the topic might make him uneasy. Perhaps you being there at his haunted amusement park was ticking him off, or if you taking that cotton floss off his nose was too much, or if you were pushing your luck, or worse what if you triggered hi-

All thoughts faded from your mind the moment you felt a slow, shaky hand grasp onto yours. You had to look to where he held you because he was so gentile you thought it was the wind. Holding onto you softly enough that it felt like a feather, somehow still creating a little pocket of warmth between you.

A glowing thump of heat pulsing inside your chest, happiness digging into your cells and giving you the confidence to squeeze his hand.

He let out a sharp inhale at the feel, still avoiding your gaze as he relaxed into your touch. Not daring to move his hand too much or he might risk ruining the moment, afraid of hurting you with his claws.

Approaching the Ferris wheel he finally spoke, “this is probably the one ride that won’t break”, not a peep about holding you. “Do you want to go on?”

You finally caught his gaze, absolutely melting at the smile in his eyes. Responding with a ‘yes’ and letting him open the door for you. Sustaining his grip with you as he helped you on, not letting go even after you sat.

The cart wasn’t exactly small, but with a guy the size of Jack it was pretty compacted. It’s not like you minded, the lack of space gave you an excuse to bunch up alongside him. The feathers from his pads tickling your face as you rested on him.

Watching the view as the cart took you higher and higher, it was perfect. The evening set in the rich obscurity of the night, lights of the festival blinking as if they had a life of their own. The bulbs on the stands making z’s as they illuminated the red and white drapes of the far off tents.

Jack held your hand with such care and caress, you gave him a reassuring press to let him know it was ok. He was so enveloped with the passionate act that he squeezed as well. Letting you feel all the dips and curves of his hand. Clutching onto you, as if you might disappear too.

Facing him to cup his cheek with your free hand, caressing him and tucking a stand of hair behind his ear. Trailing your thumb across his skin and feeling him lean into your touch, swearing that between the lines on the pad of your finger there was a tear that you had wiped away.

Getting lost in the breaths you shared as you inched closer to his lips, giving him a second of warmth longer to prove that you weren’t going anywhere.

#creepypasta #laughing jack fluff #laughing Jack #laughing jack x you #laughing jack x reader #laughing jack rants #lj #I love lj #creepypasta fluff #creepypasta headcanon #creepypasta hcs #creepypasta lj #creepypasta laughing jack #creepy #🎴 #♣️

[let-me-luve-you]

Cancer Battle

Tom Holland x Sister (with the whole Holland clan)

Summary: The reader is diagnosed with cancer, but decides to keep it from her brothers. 

Warnings: angst, cancer treatment, cancer diagnosis, brothers being rude, somewhat of a fluff ending

A/N: I did research on this. I hope I did the correct research. So I apologize if I’m wrong.

MASTERLIST

This has been the toughest two months of your life. Right when you were due to go over to America with your brothers to visit Tom, you noticed swelling in your neck. So did your mum. She set you up a doctors appointment, and two days later, you found out you had Hodgkin Lymphoma.

After talking with your doctor, you found you were in the early stages. It was still treatable and your chances of beating the cancer were very high. That helped you relax a little, but you were still in shock at hearing the words, “you have cancer.”

You wanted to start treatment right away so you told your brothers to go without you. They weren’t happy with you since you wouldn’t give them the real reason as to why you were staying behind. Every Wednesday morning for the next month, you would go with your mum or dad to the doctors office to do your antibody therapy treatment. You really didn’t want to do chemo or radiation unless it got worse, so you decided this was the next best option.

After four weeks of treatment, all of your brothers came home. Tom was disappointed you didn’t come see him, but he knew you probably had a good reason. He decided to come over to your parents house to hangout with you today. Except today wasn’t a good day. You were sick due to the side effects of the treatment. To those who didn’t know about your treatment, they would just think you had the flu. So when you walked back into your room from the bathroom, you groaned when you saw Tom sitting on the end of your bed.

“Good to see you too, Y/N.” Tom said with an eye roll.

“Hi Tom. Sorry. You might want to leave, I’m sick.” You said trying to keep your distance but you were wanting to lie down so bad.

“Mum told me. Can I get you anything?” He asked sweetly.

“I’m okay for now. Dad went to the store this morning.” You replied and motioned with your finger for him to move. He understood and moved toward your door as you went to lie down. You sighed, content when your body hit the mattress.

“I’m going to go downstairs. Text me if you need anything.” You smiled at him. “Get better soon.”

The next few days, you started feeling better. This is how it was every week. Stuck in bed on Thursday and Friday. Moving around more on Saturday and fully back to your normal self on Sunday. Then you would repeat the process again.

This Wednesday though, you weren’t feeling good. It felt like you couldn’t catch your breath. You had a fever and you could tell you had lost at least twenty pounds since your diagnosis. You got up earlier than normal to talk to your mum. When you walked into the living room, you found all four brothers.

“Hey Y/N. You okay?” Sam asked.

Ignoring his question, you looked around the room. “Where’s mum and dad?”

“Dad has a meeting at ten and mum ran to the store really quick. Said she would be back soon.” Paddy said not looking up from his phone. You nodded and turned to go back to your room to lay down until you had to go to your appointment.

“It’s a good thing you're up though. I have a press tour coming up and we are going to Bali. The three of them are going and I wanted to see if you wanted to come. You didn’t get to go last time so I thought you would enjoy it.” Tom said.

“I would but uh..” You looked around trying to think of an excuse as to why you can’t go. “I’m still getting over this sickness. Wouldn’t be good for me to go.”

“Well good thing it isn’t until next month then.” Harry said with a laugh before he turned serious. “Why are you always bailing on us? You missed the last Bali trip. You skipped last minute to go to America. Now you’re trying to get out of going to Bali again. What’s up with that?”

“I just have a lot going on. It’s not that I don’t want to, I just can’t.” You said.

“Harry has a point though Y/N. It’s like you don’t like us or something. You never go out with us when we are in town either and you won’t let us post photos of you.” Paddy said.

You stood shocked. You didn’t know how to respond, but it didn’t matter since it didn’t seem that your brothers were done.

“Can you tell us if we did something to you so we can fix it?” Tom said trying to be the nice brother like always.

“Come on mate. We didn’t do anything and she knows it. She just hates us.” Harry said with a snarl.

“Must be embarrassed by us. I don’t know why. People love us.” Paddy said. Sam agreed with Paddy and Harry. Tom just didn’t know what to do so he just stayed quiet. He wasn’t trying to make you feel bad, but he did feel rejected by you lately.

“I love you guys and I would never be embarrassed of you. I just have a lot going on.” You said. You were getting worked up and it was making it harder to breathe. You turned and started to leave the room. “Tell mum to come to my room when she gets home.” You started to walk up the stairs and ignored the hateful comments your brothers were whispering about you.

An hour later. Your mum came into the room and saw you laying there asleep. She went to push your hair out of your face and felt how hot you were. She immediately started to panic and tried to wake you up. Thankfully you opened your eyes halfway and saw your mum.

“Mum, somethings not right. I don’t feel good.” You whispered.

“Get up honey. We are going to the doctor.” Nikki said in a rush. She went to help you stand when you fell on the ground. Nikki was worried because you couldn’t hold yourself up. “DOM!” She yelled. “DOM HURRY UP! COME HERE!”

Tom thought he heard his mum call for him and he heard the worry in her voice so he sprinted to where he heard her trying to talk to Y/N. He was shocked when he saw you on the floor.

“Tom I need your help. We have to get her to the hospital now. Help me get her to the car.” Nikki said. Tom stayed staring at your almost lifeless body “TOM!” Nikki snapped to get his attention. Tom immediately went into protective brother mode and ran to you and easily picked you up bridal style and carried you down to Nikki’s car. He laid you in the backseat and then he joined you by putting your head into his lap. Nikki ran to the driver's seat and rushed to the hospital.

“Mum, what’s wrong with her?” He asked.

“I’m not sure.” Nikki answered honestly. If it hadn't been for the swollen glands, Nikki would have thought you were healthy as a horse. Now with the treatments, it always pained her to see her only daughter struggling with the illness. Once they got to the emergency room, Nikki started telling the ER doctor everything. Tom paled when he heard the word cancer. He looked up at his mum to see if what she said was true. When the doctors took you in the back to run test, Nikki finally turned to her oldest and saw him shaking.

“Cancer?” He whispered. If Nikki hadn’t been standing so close, she wouldn’t have heard him. She gently wrapped an arm around Tom and guided him to sit in a chair. Tom stayed latched to his mum as he cried for his little sister. “Wha- how- when? When did she find out?” Tom asked many minutes later once he stopped crying.

“Before the America trip.” Nikki said. “She’s been doing treatments once a week since. The treatments make her sick. That’s why you found her like she was last Thursday.”

“I had no idea.” Tom said more to himself. “That’s why she didn’t want to go to Bali.”

“Yeah. She wants to stay home until the cancer’s gone. She has a high survival rate, Tom. She didn’t want any of you to worry. That’s why she didn’t tell you.”

As Tom went to say something a doctor interrupted. “Mrs. Holland, Y/N is in a room now. You can go sit with her while we wait for the results. Since Dr. Hammon is the one treating her, she will be here to overlook her during her stay.” Nikki nodded and grabbed Tom’s hand. They followed the doctor to Y/n's room where she looked so tiny on her bed. She had an IV in and was sleeping soundly.

“We gave her some medicine to bring her fever down. She should wake up soon.”

“Thank you doctor.” Nikki said as he walked away. She turned to Tom, “I’m going to go call your father. Sit with her please.”

“Of course.” Tom said before grabbing your hand and sitting in the chair next to your bed. Tom grabbed his phone with his other hand. He quickly added Harry, Sam, and Paddy to a group text.

T: Hospital. Room 135. Waiting on the results for Y/N. We need to talk.

H: WTF?! Is she okay? Is that where you went. I’ve been looking everywhere for you.

T: Yeah. Had to help mum. Just hurry. She should have everyone here for her.

S: Called into work and got the day off. Will be there soon.

P: Harry and I are on our way too. Be there shortly.

By the time all the brothers arrived, Dom was walking into the room as well. Nikki had already spoken with Dr. Hammon and got the news of why Y/N reacted that way. Nikki decided now was the time to tell everyone the severity of it.

“Okay guys. Y/N wanted to keep this a secret, but I no longer can. She has Hodgkin Lymphoma. Her and I noticed swelling in her neck before she was going to the states so I took her to the doctor. She was diagnosed a couple days later. That’s why she didn’t go with you boys on the trip. She’s been undergoing treatment every week to help kill the cancer.” Nikki said looking at all of her sons. “I just talked with the doctor. The bad news is she doesn’t think the antibody therapy is working. She thinks it would be best to try chemotherapy next so the cancer doesn’t spread. The good news is, the cancer hasn’t spread.”

Dom visibly relaxed at hearing that news. He was thankful you were as okay as you could be. “Did she say why she reacted this way. Why did she almost pass out?” Dom asked.

“She said her body was working in overdrive to kill the cancer cells.  Her fever got too high. Now that her fever is down, she’ll be back to her old self.”

“Old self?” Tom scoffed. “Mum she’s been sick more times than she’s been feeling okay. There’s no old self in that.”

“This is her new normal for a bit. Until she defeats the cancer, this is her old self.” Nikki responded.

You groaned and tried to open your eyes. Nikki and Dom rushed to one side as Tom rushed to your other. Tom ran his hand over your head. You turned and slowly opened your eyes and met Tom’s brown ones.

“What happened? Where am I?” You asked, confused.

“Your fever got too high. Me and mum rushed you here. You’re okay now.” Tom said. You turned to see your mum next to you with your dad.

“They know sweety.” She said. You closed your eyes for a second and turned to look at Tom again.

“I’m sorry for keeping this from you.” You said.

“Don’t be. I’m just glad you’re okay now. And I’ll be here every step of the way to help you fight.” He kissed your forehead. The rest of your brothers came up to you.

“I’m sorry Y/N/N for saying you hated us.” Harry said.

“I’m sorry too.” Sam said.

“I’m sorry as well.” Paddy said.

“It’s okay you guys. I’m sorry for not telling you. Just didn’t want you to worry. You guys have a lot going on in your life. Didn’t need to add this to the list of things you were stressing over.”

“We will always worry about you, healthy or not. You’re my baby sister. I never want you to think you have to go through something like this alone.” Tom said.

“I’ll sit with you at treatments.” Harry said.

“I’ll hangout with you when you don’t feel well at home.” Paddy said.

“I’ll make all of your favorites and I’ll make you soup.” Sam said.

You smiled at your brothers and thanked them. You were glad you had such an amazing support group to back you in this fight.

#tom holland #tom holland imagines #tom holland fanfic #tom holland fanfiction #brother!tom holland #brother!tom holland x sister!reader #tom holland sister #tom holland x sister #tom holland x sister!reader #tom holland x holland!reader #tom holland x y/n #tom holland x reader #holland!sister #holland!reader #tom holland rpf #y/n holland #tom holland angst #tom holland one shot #tom holland au

[adonis-koo]

Blue Spring

| 1 |

↳ Summary: Jeon Jungkook, only well known as the youngest (and hottest) dad at the daycare, he’s got it all, the looks, the sweetheart personality, the body, but here’s what gets everyone- he doesn’t wear a wedding ring. The only problem lies in his fickle one year old daughter that hates just about every daycare worker out there...Well...besides you that is. Which of course leads to Jungkook liking you just as much as his daughter...if not maybe a little too much.

Or in other words...You and Jungkook are secretly crushing on one another but too shy to admit it.

↳ Pairing: Single dad!Jungkook/Reader

↳ Genre: Daycare AU, Slice of life, copious amounts of fluff, a hair of angst, future smut

Word Count: 4K

___ | Next

Seven thirty sharp. Your mind was groggy and you couldn’t stop the yawn that escaped your lips, you had stayed up too late the night before studying due to a test you’d have later today without even thinking about the shift you promised your coworker you’d cover. So here you were at First Steps 7:30 in the morning, coffee in hand and your hair in a messy bun.

You hadn’t even bothered getting changed besides your fitness pants. Outside of that you were still dawned in your oversized university sweatshirt. At least you’d be with the kids most of the day, one of the perks of working at a daycare was you rarely had to get dressed up.

Another perk was during naptime you could squeeze in a little more time to look over your notes, but maybe you shouldn’t get ahead of yourself considering you only slept six hours and currently look like you just rolled out bed.

Opening the door to the entrance you were greeted with the sound of cartoons, a morning routine while all the kids had their breakfast snack and got out their energy while playing. What drowned out the volume however was a familiar loud screech and whine from a little pair of arms that attached herself to the much larger figure.

“Awwwh, poor baby.” You cooed as you kneeled down, your lips quirking into a pout at the all too familiar sight, “Mina! Daddy has to go to work, he’ll be back for you later”

The little one year old suddenly perked up at the sound of your voice making you laugh softly before she quickly toddled over to you as best she could, fat crocodile tears dribbling down her cheeks as she threw herself dramatically against your chest making your lips pull into a big animated pout, “Awh it’s okay baby! Poor thing, it always takes her at least ten minutes to stop crying anytime you go.”

You picked her up, maneuvering her up to your hip as you kept her balanced in one hand, turning to fully face the tall man who you had grown acquainted too, “She’d probably cry the whole time if it weren’t for you Y/n, really thank you.” Jungkook gave an endearing smile as he let his little girl wrap her tiny hand around his finger, tears still dribbling down her cheeks as whines escaped her.

Mina, was a tough one. When new kids came in it was usually guaranteed they’d have a little separation anxiety from their parents, especially if it was the first they had ever done something like this. Usually it was recommended that the parent only leave them for an hour or so at first before they started dropping them off full time but that wasn’t always the case.

Regardless, you were both used to it and trained for it. You could almost always coax a child into looking over at the toy wall to find something they liked, or maybe they liked being read aloud too. And with particularly hard ones, you’d even let them pick out a movie if it was movie hour. But almost always, after a child was initially acquainted to you, they’d let you at least hold them or maybe coax them to play with you.

Mina, was one of the few exceptions. She had major separation anxiety from her dad and did not want any of the workers holding her- even trying to play with her. You had heard plenty about the ‘cryer’ in your work’s group chat as various staff who had worked the days she was here tried to figure out how to handle her. Then, you finally met her.

She looked doe eyed, hugging onto her dad's leg when you kneeled down and introduced yourself with a bright yet sincere smile.

You weren’t sure if it was how you said hello to her, or if it was the way you smelled like your favorite lotion, but for some reason this little girl was stuck to you like glue ever since, “You know you're her favorite right?” Jungkook joked the dimple on his cheek showing as he gave a rather boyish- yet charming smile. He was a sweetheart, through and through, you could tell how much he cared for his daughter and it only added to his charm further.

“Well, it is a part of the job,” You glanced up at him returning a tiny smile of your own as you shrugged.

You’d deny all of your coworkers giggly words and raised eyebrows anytime you were in the same room as them when Jungkook dropped Mina off. You’d also deny that you were almost always flustered in his presence, Jungkook was young, like young. He could have only been five years older than you at most. If not closer to your age.

And it wasn’t like you were blind either, he was obviously attractive. He was the talk of your coworkers day, mainly because he had a child, right? But here’s the thing, he wasn’t wearing a wedding ring.

At first you were the rational one, maybe he just had a girlfriend and they were going to tie the knot eventually? Or maybe they were one of those couples that didn’t believe in marriage. Chloe had proposed that maybe he wasn’t a jewelry type of guy and always forgot to put it on. Or maybe they were a couple that did something unorthodox like wedding bracelets.

It was Lisa who chimed in last, reminding you both that this was the dad who had his ears completely punctured with over four piercings on each side. He was definitely a jewelry kind of guy.

So why wouldn’t he wear whatever jewelry they chose as their wedding bond?

Regardless, the reason your coworkers constantly winked in your direction was because it was obvious Mina had taken a liking to you, which meant Jungkook had as well...Maybe a little too well, according to them at least.

The rest was self explanatory.

“Still, Mina’s a big daddy’s girl. I felt awful leaving her here all day the first few weeks.” Jungkook gave a bashful smile as he set the large backpack down, Jeon Mina labeled on the front which held all her favorite snacks, diapers and any possible blankets or stuffies she’d need or want from home. You usually didn’t go digging around through bags but it usually helped if a parent brought in something from home. Especially for ones like Mina who could really benefit from it.

“Oh I can tell,” You gave a laugh as Mina, as if sensing she was being talked about broke into tears again as her little hand tightened on her dad’s finger, “Oh honey, shhh,” You bounced her a little on your hip with a coo before glancing up once more, “But it’s a transitional stage for her, for any of them who tend to have separation anxiety. You might feel awful but I promise it’s fine, it’s something they all go through and adjust to as they get older. I see it all the time.”

Jungkook smiled a little at your reassurance, something about him just looked so endearingly boyish still despite being a fully grown man, maybe it was the little dimple that appeared on his cheek or the beauty mark just beneath his lower lip, “I know, it still doesn’t make it any easier though,” Just as he said those words he sighed a little as he glanced over at the clock, “Anyways I need to head on to work, I will see you later.”

Mina as if sensing his departure immediately began crying once more as he pressed a kiss on her forehead, your heart speeding up a little at him being so close, the strong scent of cologne meeting your nose before quickly disappearing. Mina had tried her best to hold onto her dad’s finger as he easily pulled away, giving a semi guilty smile at the wallowing drama queen he called his daughter as he gave you another smile and nod before exiting.

Setting your coffee down against the counter you sighed, taking a deep breath as you held Mina in both arms, her little face thrown down against your shoulder as she pitifully cried against you. Nothing like being clung to first thing in the morning before you could even drink a full cup of coffee. God you had so much respect for mothers.

“I just think, if the opportunity is there, and if he’s single...why not take it?” Lisa raised her brows as she coaxingly tried to convince you of an honestly, unprofessional idea.

Sighing you pinched the bridge of your nose as Mina colored beside you- well, if scribbling with a colored pencil counted as coloring, “Lisa, that’s a horrible idea. We don’t know if he’s single or not, and honestly? It’s none of my business. Besides he’s a dad, I don’t know….” You paused your words as you glanced around before lowering your voice into a whisper, “I don’t know shit about parenting.”

Chloe clacked her tongue as she leaned back in her seat, the tiny cherry red kids chair which almost all of you sat in rather than fight over who got to sit in the big chair, often making kids think they could sit on it in which they’d be disappointed in the result, “Y/n we work with kids everyday.” She cut into the conversation deadpan.

Leave it to Chloe to point out the obvious but working with kids or not that wasn’t even close to the same thing.

“Yeah, but we don’t live with them, Chloe, we don’t have to discipline them everyday, we don’t have to call the doctor when they get sick or- or tuck them in at night or let them sleep with us when they have a nightmare- being a caretaker and a parent might be similar but they aren’t the same.” You tapped your coloring pencil against the page of the coloring sheet Mina had picked out for you, well more like the first one she could find and drag out before slapping it against the table and pointing at a chair. If she could speak you were certain she’d be demanding for you to sit.

Having a tiny child boss you around all day wasn’t the greatest job in the world but it could certainly be worse.

“Honestly, who said anything about parenting? I mean...a flings a fling-” Chloe paused, glancing over at the four year olds who were all playing before lowering her voice and leaning in a little, “You’ve seen his body and he’s clearly interested in you, how can you not see it?”

You could feel your face flush as you looked away from her, scowling at the table. How can they talk about this in front of his daughter! Albeit she was only one years old and looked perfectly happy scribbling her piece of paper, even going as far as to help you color yours as well.

Swallowing thickly you lowered your voice before exasperatedly hissing, “I am not messing with that! It would be different if he was actively trying to talk to me but I don’t think that’s what he’s going for.”

Lisa raised her brows almost looking offended at your words, had it not been for one of the four year olds calling for her you were positive she would’ve went on a massive rant about how dumb you were, “Uh he always talks to you when he’s here? How much more does he have to beg for your attention Y/n?- Coming Wi Joo.” Standing up she huffed before making her way over to where the kids were.

Speak of the devil you were surprised at who had poked their head through the door, Jungkook had stayed behind watching with a soft smile at his little girl happily coloring beside you, tugging on your finger to make you look at her picture as you nodded, leaning in as you whispered, “I think someone is here for you.” Mina glanced up as you pointed your finger to the door.

You had never seen a toddler look so frantic as she cried in happiness, Jungkook never came by this early so it must have been a treat. Unfortunately Mina was still clumsy on her feet and tripped on her way to her dad before dramatically rolling onto her back as she cried.

“Oh my goodness!” Jungkook exclaimed as he walked in with a chuckle as he glanced down with precious eyes at his baby who glanced up at him with foe crocodile tears, purposely acting like she was hurt so he’d pick her up, “Is my babygirl okay?” He leaned down before effortlessly picking her up, her crying immediately stopped as a giggle bubbled on her lips as if feeling she had successfully tricked her dad into picking her up, “Was she good?”

Jungkook had asked as he turned to you, standing up as you rounded the table with a nod, “Oh yeah! A little fussy this morning but I think it was because she hadn’t had a snack yet, not to mention she was pretty upset for you leaving. I think all is forgiven though since you came by early.”

Laughing Jungkook nodded as he shifted her to his hip, “Yeah I only had a half day at work, so I figured I’d take her to get some lunch before dropping her off at her moms. She’ll probably be mad at me again but what can I do?”

“Uh Y/n- Ji Woo puked, you mind getting us some more paper towels?” You cringed as you looked over at Lisa who had pulled a crying Ji Woo along to the bathroom as Chloe hearded the other kids away from the mess.

“Oh she’ll survive. She loves to be a drama queen though, right Mina?” You poked her cheek making a giggle escape her lips as she grabbed your finger with both of her hands, a bubble escaping her lips as if she were trying her hardest to say something, little brows focused, “M…!” You laughed at her cute little focused expression, her doe eyes glancing at you like her little life depended on it, “Anyways, have a good day guys, I’ll see you later.”

You gave a short wave to them both, intending to go and get more paper towels because the sight of the bile was large and it was clear someone had still been motion sick even after the car ride. God didn’t his mom say she’d stop letting him eat in the car before taking him here?

“Oh uh!”

You turned around at the sound of Jungkook’s almost jumbled words, his eyes wide as if he had forgotten something before sharply forcing his voice to sound more calm, “I was uh wondering….” He suddenly looked a little hesitant, eyes glancing down as you raised your brows, “Umm, I...I promised my boss I’d come in on Saturday to help with a project and I really need a babysitter for Mina....Would you mind...if you aren’t busy of course!” He suddenly rushed. You tilted your head at first, mainly because it looked like he wanted to ask you something else but had changed his mind.

Tugging on a strand of your hair you quickly glanced over at the Chloe who had been telling the younger kids to stay away from the mess despite their ignorance, “Uh yeah! No, as long as you don’t mind me studying while watching her, um. I- uh- I...really need to go over and help...Let me uh-” You grabbed one of First Steps business cards before turning it over and using the back to write down your number, “Here, you can send me the details and we can work out pay a little later.”

Jungkook’s eyes lit up before he smiled, grabbing the card from you as he nodded, “Yes- absolutely! Thank you Y/n, I’ll uh,” He gave a small laugh as he glanced over to your frantic coworker, “I’ll leave you to it, say bye Mina.” He grabbed her little arm as he made her wave making you laugh as you quickly ran over to help Chloe.

Maybe...just maybe your coworkers were onto something.

You swallowed thickly, feeling only slightly intimidated at the size of the house. Jungkook couldn’t have been in his thirties already, right? I mean, you knew he was definitely older than you but still...there was no way someone in their twenties could already afford to live somewhere so nice. Right?

Meanwhile you were stuffed in a small apartment close to the uni with three roommates who all lived on ramen, you included. Fixing the bag over your shoulder you took an inhale before stepping up to the door and knocking, it was only a few moments before the door swung open. Much to your surprise you were met with a wet headed Jungkook, dawned in sweatpants and a loose white shirt that still somehow strapped against his broad shoulders, “Oh good you’re here! Come in.”

Jungkook ushered as he stood aside, carefully you took your shoes off as Jungkook waved you over, “Mina is in the living room right now watching cartoons, she’s never hungry this early in the morning but she has some chocolate milk, um, oh yeah, she’ll probably want breakfast around nine or so. I have some cereal in the dolly if you want an easy way out,” Jungkook had lead you into the kitchen- the very nice kitchen, granite countertops, smooth tile flooring and a spacious middle counter, “But I also have plenty of ingredients if you wanna be adventurous and making pancakes or anything- word of advice she’s picky about eggs.” Jungkook sent a playful wink your way making your face flair up as you gave a laugh- though it felt more nervous than anything.

“Also, feel free to eat as well, I don’t want you to starve while you’re here,” Jungkook continued, eyes genuine as he paused for a moment, making you nod before he gestured you into the living room, the lights were all turned off and the curtains had yet to be drawn making the room much more dark than it appeared except for the TV.

Your heart was ready to melt at the pile of blankets on the couch, Mina was practically buried in them happily, her stuffed bear she always carried with her nestled against her as she sleepily yawned, “I’m not really a restrictive parent when it comes to TV but if it’s grating on your sanity you can feel free to turn it off at any time, she’ll be a little whiney about it but there’s plenty of toys in her room, speaking of,”

You passed into the hallway with Jungkook as he walked all the way down to the end, opening the door into a much brighter and frilly room decked in light princess pink, toys scattered across the floor, “All of her coloring and markers are in her closet, any toy she could possibly need is in here, she might insist it isn’t but trust me- it is. I usually put her down for a nap around after lunch and get her up around three or so before dinner. That pretty much covers everything. Since she’s home she probably won’t cry, I’ll be home around two or so anyways so I’m sure it’ll go by quick for her. Uh do you have any questions or…?”

“No! I mean, it sounds good to me. I wrestle with kids everyday when it comes to nap time so I doubt anything will be any more challenging than that. Uh otherwise I should be fine, I can always call if I have a problem but I’m not worried about it, Mina’s a good kid at daycare so I’m sure she’ll be fine at home. Is there anything you want me to make sure to do?” You asked as you both walked back down the hall

Jungkook gave it some thought for a moment before giving a shrug altogether, “No, I have complete faith you’ll be fine. I know you guys get to deal with a lot of bitchy parents but I’m not really….” he paused for a moment, looking away with a familiar expression to Mina whenever she was focused, “I trust you, that’s all.” Oh...your face flushed a little at his words, both of you paused for a second as you realized how close you were to him at the moment.

Why did this feel so domestic?

Jungkook looked like he just rolled out of bed...and so did you...it almost felt like it another universe rather then coming over to watch his daughter it was like you could be living together- No! No! No! Don’t let your mind go there! Both of you broke out of whatever tranced silence had took over at the gurgle of excitement. Blabber coming from Mina in excitement at the sight of you, her thumb escaping her lips as she dropped her blanket, toddling over to you before hugging your leg, “Awwwh goodmorning honey.” You couldn’t help but coo out, internally squealing at just how cute she was.

God you loved kids.

Picking her up she excitingly bounced against your hip before wrapping her tiny arms around you. Jungkook’s eyes crinkled a little at the sight, “Alright, if you’re set here then I better get going. I’ll be back soon.” He leaned in kissing Mina’s forehead as she cooed softly, clearly in contentment as he smiled once more before exiting the kitchen. Except unlike at daycare she stayed calm the whole time, maybe not even realizing he was gone. Instead, Mina chose to snuggle up against you as you laughed walking back into the living room before carefully sitting on the couch.

Glancing at the entry way you couldn’t help but wonder where Jungkook worked for him to be going in wearing such casual attire. He was usually a little more formal with his clothes, not suit and tie but well fitted jeans and maybe a button up. Clacking your tongue you forced yourself to relax, you were going to be here for over six hours, might as well get comfortable.

The hours did in fact go by fast, you had spent most of the morning studying before going into the kitchen, deciding you’d make plenty of breakfast for both you and Mina while splurging on premade french toast sticks in the freezer while making sausage to go.

Given Mina couldn’t talk yet it had been a little lonely within the hours but it was a good time spent on studying until she was suddenly out of sight and getting into something, or trying to fall off something, or...well...you get the idea.

Naptime was more difficult than you anticipated, especially given how easily she was knocked out at daycare, but then again she also used a lot more energy there when crying. Mina was in the comforts of her home and was not happy to be told it was naptime.

You never could get her in her room but she eventually lost the battle when she cuddled in your lap and eventually fell asleep, your text book in hand as you tiredly rubbed your eyes, yawning before forcing your eyelids back open.

You hadn’t even heard the door open until the sight of Jungkook quietly came into view, he was in silent awe at the sight, you looked picture perfect with Mina sleeping against you, he felt his heartrate spike when you noticed him, giving your own sleepy smile as he sat down next to you, not too close, but enough to get a good look at your tired features, “Was she good?”

You gave a tiny nod as you set the text book down, “Yeah, stubborn about naptime but here we are.”

Jungkook gave a soft laugh, mindful of his voice as he didn’t wanna wake his princess, eyes affectionate as he glanced down, “Sounds about right, I usually get a naptime too when she gets like this. Guess you found out she’s a big cuddler.”

“Oh yeah, she tried to toddle off a few times but she stuck to me most of the day. She’s never been this clingy at daycare but I can understand why.” You carefully shifted in your seat a little, trying to straighten yourself from your sunken position without waking her, it was silent for a moment before you decided to tread carefully, “So uh, where do you work Jungkook? If you don’t mind me asking.”

“Oh no it’s fine, I work as a game developer for Bandai Namco. We’ve been working on a new expansion for the Soul series lately and we’re behind so I’ve been going in extra to try and get us ahead again. I wish I didn’t have too since Saturdays are the only days I get to really spend with Mina…” A twinge of guilt flickered on Jungkook’s face as he pressed his lips together, yet if you looked closer you could see he seemed almost sad, maybe disappointed in himself, “I um, I know you’re studying but...How about you? I’m assuming you’re in university right?”

You gave a small smile as you nodded, “Yeah, I’m studying in nursing right now,” You could tell he seemed a little taken aback by your answer making you laugh, “I know, a lot of people assume I’m in for teaching, especially sense that’s the norm for daycare workers, but…! I am hoping to get in at the children’s hospital, I love working with kids.”

“You’re great with them,” Jungkook hadn’t meant to let it slip from his mouth but it was too late, silence had taken over once more as you gave a shyer smile as Jungkook fumbled, cheeks beginning to dust pink, “I mean...uh! You are! You know how to calm them down and uh…Mina really likes you, so um, that counts for something. She’s really picky with people, you didn’t hear it from me but she really doesn’t even like her mom.”

You tried to laugh yet you couldn’t force it, something felt particularly taboo about laughing at that yet you didn’t know why. You couldn’t help but wonder why Mina’s mom couldn’t watch her. Or why Jungkook seemed so serious despite his joking tone, “Well I think deep down all kids secretly have a favorite parent,” You kept your tone light yet neutral, not wanting to tread on sensitive ground with whatever seemed to be going on with Jungkook’s significant other.

You weren’t sure what the story was but going off his words yesterday at the daycare he must have been divorced if Mina’s mom didn’t live with him. And give his joking- yet serious comment their relations must not have ended kindly.

“Fair enough, maybe it’s just me but I think I’m a pretty awesome dad.” Jungkook boasted with that boyish grin making you stifle your laugh. After the initial ice had been broken you both seemed to hold a conversation easily and before you had knew it the hours had slipped away from you. Mina eventually waking up from her nap only to gurgle in delight at the sight of her dad, crawling into his lap, “Oh I should probably get going,” you had checked your phone only for your eyes to widen at the time, “I promised my friends I’d help get snacks for movie night.”

Shifting in your seat as you stood up, Jungkook mirroring you leaving Mina on the couch with a whine in complaint, “Oh yeah of course! I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to keep you…!”

“No! It’s okay,” You rushed out, feeling your cheeks begin to warm as you rubbed your neck, “...I actually enjoyed myself…!” You shuffled in your spot feeling your throat become dry at the silence as you wracked your brain to find something else to say.

Jungkook cleared his throat, feeling a little meek as he rubbed his nose, “W-well um...maybe we can uh...maybe we can do this again sometime?” You felt your face burn at his shy expression, peering up at you hesitantly before continuing, “O-or maybe go out to eat sometime…? With Mina of course!” He rushed, “She’d be a little mad if we left her here.”

You couldn’t help the soft laugh that escaped you despite the nervous butterflies in your stomach, “Of course she would...id...I’d like that a lot..!” Oh god, did he just ask you out? Your brain was wrecked with a million thoughts as you and Jungkook fumbled with your goodbyes. The warm air meeting your lunges with relief as you stepped outside before shoving your face into your hands. He asked you out! Jeon Jungkook, only the hottest dad at the daycare really just asked you out!

Sucking in another breath of air you couldn’t help but let the giddy grin tug on your lips. Maybe this wasn’t such a bad idea. Jungkook obviously liked you enough to try a date and...and why not not! Maybe your friends weren’t wrong after all.

Note: thank you all for being so patient with me! I know Blue Spring has been highly anticipated and the wait is over! It was originally meant to be a oneshot but it just got ridiculously long lmao so by popular choice it’s going to be a four part mini series! Please enjoy and let me know what you think!! 🖤

#bts #jeon jungkook #jungkook #jungkook x reader #jungkook x reader smut #single dad jungkook #jungkook x y/n #jungkook imagine #jungkook au #jungkook x y/n smut #bts au

[mandospace]

Cuun aliit morut'yc (Din Djarin x Reader)

Request: hi heard your requests are open and I was wondering if I could request mando x reader ? Maybe reader is having a nightmare and calls out for him or something ? Thank you 💕✨

Requested By: @theichabbieclub​

Word Count: 1,873

Warnings: Violence, sligh swearing, racism/microaggression??(Gideon is an ass, you’ll see what I mean), nightmares, fluff.

A/N: It has been so long since I’ve posted anything, and I am so sorry for that. College has been kicking my butt recently since it is my last semester and there is just not enough time in the day for me to get everything done. Also sorry that it’s so short and being posted so late. Anyways, I hope you like it and my requests are open! Or you can also just drop by to say hello :)

MASTERLIST

You had to find them. 

Adrenaline was pumping through your veins, pushing your legs to move faster down the dark corridor. At every door you slammed on the breaks, flung it open, and scanned the room for your missing family. With every empty room, the feeling of dread settled deeper.

“No, no, no,” you repeat to yourself, flinging open another door. Empty. Feet scrambled to the next one. Empty, again. They had to be here, right? Logic and reason told you that they had to be here, somewhere, in this giant starship. Your family hidden from you.

Another door, another empty room. Dread soon replaced the adrenaline that was pumping through your veins. It was like you could feel it’s icy grip on you, freezing every cell in your body. Your heart beat faster in your chest, trying to keep the icy tendrils at bay. It was no use, they were gone— gone from you forever and there was nothing that you could do about it.

Just as you were about to accept your lonely fate and let the numbness set in, you heard it— a small, tiny giggle. Immediately your head snapped up and to the left. You knew that laugh, that giggle— it was one you heard from your adopted son every time you played hide and seek with him.

Your boots scrambled for purchase on the shiny waxed floor and you chased after the sound. With every turn you could hear it getting louder— more full and heartier. Tears started to wet the corner of your eyes at the idea that you almost found him— your ad’ika.

The laughter was coming from behind a black door, identical to the others. It finally slid open and you saw him— a little green thing dressed in his brown sack. The bottom was torn and one of his little feet was sticking out of it— you and Din had sewn it together to protect his feet once he started walking. Your heart tugged at the memory. The tears began to flow freely.

“Oh, ad’ika,” you breathed out in relief. You fell to your knees to scoop up the little bean but he seemed to disappear right under your fingertips— like a mirage or a hologram. Confusion replaced the relief you once felt.

A ‘tsk-ing’ sounded from behind you and you spun around on your knees. From the shadows emerged Moff Gideon, holding your son in his arms. Grogu had small handcuffs around his tiny wrists and a muzzle over his small mouth. His ears dropped in sadness.

“Let go of him!” the snarl ripped through your chest and before you could lunge out at him, four stormtroopers had their blasters trained on you.

“Now, is that any way to address your superior?” Gideon smirked down at you, stepping further into the dim light of the room.

“You’re not my superior. You are the scum of the galaxy. You aren’t even worth bantha shit.”

“Ouch,” he chuckled patronizingly at you. “You really should watch your mouth, girl. Especially since I have your son and Mandalorian.”

The mention of Din must have made you react or something because shortly after Gideon was back to laughing at you. The stormtroopers moved in on you, blasters trained at your head while the door slid open. Another trooper dragged something behind him, and to your shock and horror you realized the thing he was dragging was Din’s limp body.

“Mand—” before the words even fully left your mouth a trooper was swinging the back of his hand towards your face, backhanding you. Blood filled your mouth.

Din laid in a heap of beskar, unmoving and lifeless. Your eyes searched his form for any type of injury. He was barely breathing— his chest only raising slightly. You turned back to Gideon.

“What did you do to him?”

“You should be more worried about what I will do to him than what I already have done, girl,” Gideon stepped closer to Din’s unconscious body, giving him a swift kick to the ribs. A horrible crunching sound reverberated through the room.

“Stop! Don’t hurt him!” tears flowed past your cheeks. “Please.”

Gideon just smiled ruefully at you while he knelt down next to Din’s limp body. He leaned in close to his helmeted face. “Did you hear that, Mando? Your girl is begging me to not hurt you. Should I listen to her?”

“Please.”

“Okay, then,” Gideon stood up but not before nudging Din’s helmet with his boot. “Maybe she’d prefer if I hurt your child?”

“NO!” the cry was ripped from your chest. Gideon had grabbed Grogu by the back of his sack and gave him a shake. His small whimpers and big eyes broke your heart into a million pieces. “Please, no. Please, do something to me instead. Don’t hurt my family, please.”

“Interesting proposition, but no.” Gideon tossed Grogu to the ground next to his father. You went to move towards them but was met with blasters poking your back. “Why would I hurt you— physically, at least— when I can hurt my most hated adversary?”

Immediately the blasters that were trained on you moved to Din. “No, please, no!”

“It’s a package deal for me, it really is,” Gideon sauntered towards you, crouching on his haunches. His gloved hand gripped your jaw and forced you to look him in the eyes. “I first will kill the child that turned out to be a waste of my efforts. Then, as you are sobbing over your dead child, I kill Mando as he watches his— what do you people call it? Riduur?” the Mando’a wraps distastefully around his tongue. “Well, whatever it is— I kill him in a merciful act to put him out of his misery. And then that leaves you, whom I will drop off on some desolate moon to live out the rest of your days knowing you couldn’t have done a damn thing to change the outcome.”

Your eyes widened in horror at his plan. “You’re a monster!”

“No, girl,” Gideon stood. “I’m Empire.”

He motioned with his hands and suddenly all of the blasters were trained on your son. 

“NO!” your cries tumbled past your lips and onto deaf ears. “Please, no! Mando, wake up! Mando!”

“Say goodbye to your family.”

The remaining troopers grabbed you by the arms and forced you to watch what was about to happen. You struggled in their grasp but it was no use. “Mando! D-Din! Din, wake up! Din! DIN!”

Time slowed down and a single red plasma beam streaked towards your son. “DIN!”

“Cyare, wake up.”

You felt someone shaking you but you were still frozen in place, watching your life be destroyed.

“Cyar’ika, please,” Din’s voice seemed to be coming from behind you, but that made no sense— he was currently on the floor in front of you, motionless. “Come back to me.”

It was those four words that pulled you from your nightmare. Eyes flying open, you were met with the dark interior of the ship, not the Imperial starship you thought you were on. Your breaths came quickly and your heart raced. You searched the area for Din and gasped when you felt his warm touch on your arm. 

“Din,” you cried and flung your arms around his neck. He immediately pulled you onto his lap and wrapped his arms around your waist. The cold beskar and the warmth of his exposed neck grounded you— he was still dressed from the day’s earlier hunt, sans his glove and helmet. His scent enveloped you and the feeling of his tousled locks under your fingertips brought you back to reality.

“Are you alright?” he pressed his lips to your hairline and rubbed soothing circles into your back. When you shook your head and buried your face further into his neck, he picked up his motions. “Shhhh, it's okay. I have you. I’m here.”

You hadn’t noticed but you began to shake violently in Din’s arms as the sobs wracked through your body. Din just held you tighter, pressed kisses to your forehead, and whispered soothing Mando’a in your ear. 

After you had calmed down a bit, you pulled back from Din who’s neck and cowl was now soaked with your tears. His brown eyes searched yours and his warm palm cupped your cheek, his thumb lightly grazing your cheekbone. “Do you want to talk about it?”

You didn’t want to talk about ‘it’ in fear that you would break down at the memory of your son being shot. Your son!

“Din, where’s Grogu?” your voice came out high and panicked. You could feel the anxiety gripping your heart. 

“He’s in his pram, sleeping,” both of his hands were cupping your face now. His forehead dropped to yours in a Keldabe kiss. “He’s fine, he’s safe. I’m safe. You’re safe. Our aliit is safe.”

“I—I need to see him,” your words still held a sense of panic. “Hold him.”

“Of course, Cyare,” Din pressed his lips to yours briefly— reassuring you that he would be right back. When he returned with a grumpy looking frog in his arms— not happy that he was woken from his sleep— the tears streaming down your face were no longer from sorrow but joy.

“Oh, my ad’ika!” you reached out for your son and took him from his father’s arms. At seeing his mother, Grogu let out a small chirp of happiness. You held him tightly to your chest and placed kisses all over his wrinkly green forehead. Grogu must have sensed your distress because he started to pat your cheek with his tiny hand. 

Din took his place next to you and pulled you back onto his lap, his strong arms wrapping tightly around his family. Grogu curled into your chest and you curled into Din’s. 

“We’re safe, ner riduur,” his warm lips pressed against your forehead. “Cuun aliit morut'yc.”

“I was so scared, Din,” you whispered, placing a gentle kiss to your sleeping child’s head. You met Din’s eyes. “It was awful.”

“I know, Cyare,” he resumed rubbing soothing circles into your back. “You were calling out for me in your sleep, screaming my name. You only do that when it’s really bad.”

“Oh,” this was news to you. You never knew that you talked in your sleep. “Sorry.”

“No, do not be sorry, Riduur,” Din grabbed your chin and tilted your head back, forcing you to meet his gaze. “I will always be there for you when you need me. Remember our vows? ‘Mhi me'dinui an— we will share all.’ That includes sharing your fears and sorrows. You don’t have to face them alone, Riduur.”

“Ni kar'tayl gar darasuum, Din.”

The smallest smile formed on his lips. He would never tire of hearing you say that. “Ni kar'tayl gar darasuum.”

He leaned in and captured your lips in a soft kiss— one that said everything left unspoken. How Din would always be there for you. How he would protect you and your small clan of three. How he would fight till his dying breath to keep you safe and happy. You were his family, his aliit, and no amount of bad dreams would take that away from him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

MANDO’A TRANSLATIONS:

Cyare = beloved

Cyar’ika = darling, sweetheart

Riduur = partner, spouse, husband, wife

Ner riduur = my partner, spouse, husband, wife

Ad’ika = little one, son, daughter

Aliit = family

Cuun aliit morut'yc = our family is safe

Mhi me'dinui an =  we will share all; a part of the Mandalorian marriage vows

Ni kar'tayl gar darasuum = I love you

#din djarin x reader #din djarin x you #din djarin x y/n #din djarin imagine #din djarin drabble #din djarin oneshot #din djarin one shot #din djarin fanfic #din djarin fanfiction #din djarin fan fiction #mandalorian x reader #mandalorian x you #mandalorian x y/n #mandalorian imagine #mandalorian drabble #mandalorian one shot #mandalorian oneshot #mandalorian fanfic #mandalorian fanfiction #mandalorian fan fiction #mando x reader #mando x you #mando x y/n #mando imagine #mando drabble #mando oneshot #mando one shot #mando fanfic #mando fanfiction #mando fan fiction

[mrsalwayswrite]

Singing in the Shower (Ragnarssons x Reader)

This is just a silly little one-shot that came to mind that I could not stop thinking about. It got a bit deeper than I planned but oops?

Also my first time writing a Ragnarssons x reader! Please let me know if I did all the brothers justice. Except Bjorn isn’t in here. So its just the sons of Aslaug. Sorry, Bjorn.  

Warnings: some brief mentions of abusive/unhealthy past relationships, reader has some insecurities, the brothers being the best roomies ever but also creepers, like one or two swear words, FLUFFY GOODNESS!!! 

Words: 3700

Tag List: @youbloodymadgenius​

 (picture is from Pinterest. Not mine.)

The sound of laughter echoed around you even before leaving your bedroom. It was a Sunday night so that meant the Lothbrok brothers were all over. A tradition Ubbe started some months ago to make sure the four brothers stayed connected in each other's lives. Every Sunday evening, all of them would congregate in the three bedroom flat you shared with Ubbe and Hvitserk. They would order a stack of pizzas and enough beer to put a pub crawl to shame, and watch movies or play video games until the early morning hours. Only twice had fist fights broken out between Sigurd and Ivar with just a table and a lamp damaged in the process, so Ubbe called it a win. 

 It had only been about a year that you lived with Ubbe and Hvitserk. Sigurd chose to move in with a couple members of the band he played in. Aslaug vehemently refused to let Ivar move out due to his many medical needs that she claimed he could only receive proper attention for at home. In equal parts rebellion and to escape his mother’s suffocating attention, Ivar spent the majority of his free time and nights crashing on the couch at your shared flat. 

 At first, you were hesitant about living with the two brothers, having only known them through friends, but you decided to give it a chance. Within a couple of months, you found the strange dynamics of your shared space and your vastly different relationships with each of the brothers to feel eerily familiar….like being home. 

 Standing at your door, you listened to the brothers for a few moments, smiling broadly as you heard Hvitserk taunting Sigurd about how he was going to beat his ass if he threw another blue shell at him. Meanwhile Ivar was yelling something about the undeniable magic of Yoshi and his winning streak. They must be playing Mario Kart again. 

 It was nice to hear them all getting along. Normally Sunday nights you hung out with your boyfriend to give the brothers privacy, even though all of them repeatedly told you it was unnecessary. That was until last week. You had taken a selfie on your boyfriend's phone and went to set it as his background to surprise him….and found nude pictures of other girls and the dick pics he sent them back. Before you stormed out of his flat, you may have thrown his phone against the wall, pleased when the screen shattered just like your trust. Then you came home and cried to Hvitserk about how you were swearing off men and just wanted to be a spinster for the rest of your life. 

 Word must have spread between the brothers. For the rest of the week, they all offered their support in various ways. Sigurd texted you a few times to check on you and remind you that clearly you were better off without your ex. Ubbe gave you long hugs as if trying to soak the pain out of you, and made sure you were eating and getting out of bed. Hvitserk surprised you with a new sugary treat every day ranging from Oreos to ice cream to chocolate muffins; then you two would cuddle on the couch indulging yourselves while watching movies. Ivar threatened to beat up your now ex-boyfriend for making you cry and take pictures to send to those girls your ex had been texting. You made sure to shut Ivar's idea down quickly but pressed a quick kiss to his cheek and thanked him for offering. You hated your ex, that did not mean you wanted him dead. 

 You pushed away from your door and down the hallway. Popping your head around the corner, you saw the brothers in various positions in the living room, eyes all glued to the TV and the race happening on-screen. 

 "I'm gonna shower." You announced, receiving grunts of affirmations as they were too focused to fully acknowledge you. Smiling at their antics, you headed into the bathroom, shutting the door and starting the shower up. Once the water was at the perfect temperature, you stripped and jumped in. Of course, once the mixture of hot water and steam helped you relax, you started singing to yourself, letting the worries of the day fade away for just a moment as the words flowed from your lips and echoed off the shower stall walls like your own little stage. 

 Unbeknownst to you, as soon as the bathroom door shut and the sound of water running could be heard, the volume on the TV was muted. 

 Ivar, surprisingly, was the first one to overhear your singing. He had come over to crash for a few hours after his latest doctor appointment and to work on an assignment for a University class. The bathroom door somehow had not fully latched when you closed it, cracking open while you were in the shower….and you started singing. Ivar sat stunned on the couch at the voice slipping out of the bathroom like a siren's song. He remained there, transfixed as you sang some song he had never heard but he could feel in his chest. Once you stopped singing and the shower turned off, he quickly jumped up and hobbled over to silently shut the door, slightly embarrassed by the idea of you catching him listening in to your shower singing. 

 Later that day after you headed out to work, Ivar asked Ubbe and Hvitserk if they had heard you sing yet. Both of them denied ever hearing you sing. When asked if he knew anything, Sigurd was upset, having asked you on multiple nights to go to a karaoke bar with him and some friends. You always refused by saying you sounded Iike a beached whale. 

 Ubbe was next to overhear. He was walking by the bathroom on the way to the kitchen when he heard your voice drifting from underneath the bathroom door. Feeling like a creeper but curiosity winning out, he pressed his ear to the bathroom door to listen better. To say he had been shocked was an understatement. Sure, he had heard Ivar praise your voice, but he figured his youngest brother was exaggerating. It made him wonder why you never sang in front of others. 

 A silent pact was made between the brothers that they would never share the information of your singing with anyone outside the four of them….and whenever you jumped in the shower, whoever was the closest would go and crack the bathroom door open so they could hear you better. 

 This time was no different. 

 Sigurd was closest, so after Ubbe paused the game, he jumped up and silently cracked open the door so your beautiful voice could flow out. The game picked back up but remained on mute so they could hear you. The first song you serenaded them with was Walk Me Home by Pink. Apparently, one of your new favorites since you sang it so often. Next was Someone Like You by Adele. By the third song, the brothers had abandoned the game and were solely focused on you and the raw emotion bleeding from your voice. This time you started to sing Someone You Loved by Lewis Capaldi.  

 Ubbe spoke up, keeping his voice quiet just in case you could hear them, however unlikely. "Has she said anything about her ex lately?"

 "Not to me." Hvitserk answered first. "I thought she was doing fine."

 "Just because she's not crying all the time doesn't mean she's fine." Ivar retorted harshly, never removing his eyes from the direction of the bathroom. After a moment, he got up and hobbled towards the bathroom. 

 "Ivar…. Ivar, what are you doing?" Ubbe hissed but was ignored. 

 As quiet as possible, Ivar walked into the bathroom and sat on the toilet lid; your singing managed to cover the sounds of his movement. As he rolled his head to the side, it was to find his brothers had followed him with varying expressions ranging from concern to amusement. 

 Normally you did not spend so long in the shower but today you decided to spoil yourself. You had been doing well all week but this morning you were scrolling through your Instagram and happened to stumble upon a picture of your ex with a new girl, smiling happily and kissing at a restaurant…. the day after you broke up. And seeing them together felt like it ripped a tear into the slowly healing pieces of your heart. 

 Instead of going out like you planned to do, you laid in bed all-day binge-watching movies and feeling like an idiot. So in the shower you took extra time pampering yourself, using a deep conditioner in your hair, shaving everywhere and just letting the hot water cascade down your skin and loosen the tense muscles. 

 At this point you were feeling a little better and decided it was best not to waste any more water. You turned the water off, running your hands down your body to get as much excess water off, before you reached for your towel. Grabbing the plush towel hanging on the rack, you quickly dried your hair and wrapped the towel around your body before pulling the curtain back….

 Only to shriek as you realized you were not alone in the bathroom. 

 "What? What are you guys doing?" You demanded, eyes frantically darting between the four brothers.

 Ivar sat on the toilet lid; head tilted as he watched you with a peculiar expression on his face. Hvitserk leaned against the sink, eyes darting from your towel-clad body to the floor then back up. Ubbe and Sigurd stood in the doorway, both looking the least comfortable but still not moving. 

 "We, ah, we were…. well, we are concerned for you." Ubbe said, rubbing the back of his neck. 

 "Concerned?" You asked incredulously. 

 Ivar ignored your question. "Is this about your ex? Want me to pay him a visit?"

 "What are you talking about?"

 "Your singing. They were sad songs." Sigurd answered, leaning against the doorframe with his arms crossed. 

 Heat flooded your face. You dropped your head, staring at the bathroom floor as you clutched the towel closer to your body. Honestly, the idea of them hearing your singing was far more humiliating than them seeing you naked at this point. "You…. you heard me…. singing?"

 "Y/n, are you OK? You know you can tell us anything." Hvitserk said, trying to meet your eye. 

 "Um, can…. can we talk about this when…. when I'm not naked?" 

 "Of course. Come on, brothers." Ubbe quickly agreed, tapping the door as if to signal. He and Sigurd walked away first. Only when you finally met Hvitserk's eye did he push off the sink and head out but not before giving you a flirty wink. 

 "Ivar…."

 He slouched back, folding his hands behind his head. "I'm quite comfortable here."

 "Oh gods, please, Ivar." You begged, almost on the verge of tears. 

 He stared at you a long moment before pushing himself to his feet. "Don't think you're getting out of this."

 "Ok."

 Appeased, he made his way out of the bathroom, closing the door behind him. 

 Once alone, you stepped out of the shower only to drop onto the toilet lid and place your head in your hands. Your chest heaved and your eyes stung as you fought back the tears that threatened to fall. Today was bad enough and now this. It had to be something out of a nightmare. Your own personal hell. 

 When you finally composed yourself, you quickly changed into your comfiest sweats and tank top. You wished you could make a run for your room, anything to avoid the impending conversation but you knew the brothers would follow, they were all stubborn and persistent when they wanted to be. 

 With a deep breath, you stepped out of the bathroom and towards the living room. What hushed disagreement the brothers were clearly having abruptly ended when they noticed you. Awkwardly you remained standing, unsure where to sit. The only open spots were on the couch between Hvitserk and Ivar or one of the recliners as Ubbe sat in the other one. Sigurd reclined on the rocker gaming chair on the floor. 

 Averting your eyes, you started towards the open recliner only to have a strong arm snake around your waist as you passed by and pulled you onto the couch. You squeaked as you suddenly found yourself perched on Ivar's lap. Somewhere you had certainly never been before. 

 "Where do you think you're going?" He asked, a cocky grin spread across his face. 

 "Um, over there." You nodded your head towards the other open spot. 

 "No, you're sitting here now."

 "Stop hogging her, brother." Hvitserk reached over and dragged you off Ivar. Somehow you ended up with your back against Hvitserk's side, his arm slung around you and your legs across Ivar's lap, him slowly running his hand up and down them. 

 Ubbe raised an eyebrow at the three of you. "Are you done yet?"

 "I thought we were just fine but I guess Hvitty had other plans." Ivar snarked, rolling his eyes. 

 "We're good now." Hvitserk said with a cheesy smile, making you giggle. 

 "So how are you really doing, y/n?" Ubbe asked, staring at you with those knowing blue eyes. 

 "Um, I'm alright. Today was just…. rough." At the four questioning looks, you quickly explained about what you found this morning on Instagram. 

 Ivar slapped the armrest of the couch. "I'm beating his ass now and nothing you say can stop me."

 You snagged his other hand that was still on your leg and clasped it, as if that alone could diminish his deadly intent. "Please don't. He's not worth it. I just…. I just want to move on. Ok?"

 He grumbled, but eventually gripped your hand and gave it a single squeeze in acknowledgement. 

 Now here was the part that petrified you; but you needed to know. 

 "Um, how…. how long have…. was this your first time?" Your words stumbled out, making you cringe at how ineloquent it was. 

 "What are you talking about?" Sigurd drawled; one foot propped up so he slowly rocked in the gaming chair.  

 You licked your lips, your mouth suddenly dry. You dropped your gaze, as you whispered your answer. "My….my singing."

 "What? You sound bloody brilliant! The others have heard you more than me but you always sound amazing!" Sigurd exclaimed, a beaming smile on his face. "I don't know why you haven't gone out with me before! Oh! I'd love for you to try and sing in my band, we could use an amazing vocalist like you! Gods, we could get way more gigs with a beautiful woman like you upfront singing."

 Soon as Sigurd started talking, you covered your face with your hands. The tears you managed to repress earlier flooded back. Your shoulders hunched over, cowering into yourself at the revelation. They had all heard you. Apparently more than just this one time. It was mortifying. Long ago you stopped singing in front of others, no longer able to face the ridicule, the degrading comments always thrown your way. And now, these brothers that you had become so close to…. if they said anything negative towards you right now, you were sure your heart would fully break and no lyric would ever pass your lips again. 

 Hvitserk shifted behind you, turning you so he could wrap both arms around your waist and place his cheek against the side of your head. "Y/n, talk to us." 

 You shook your head, the barely suppressed tears and poisoned words clogging your throat. 

 Abruptly, a pair of calloused hands grabbed yours, forcing them away from your face. You were immediately met by a pair of piercing blue eyes, only inches from your face. 

 "Whose ass am I killing now? Huh?" Ivar demanded in a low, menacing tone. Between his tone and the fury burning in his eyes, you knew he meant his question, and that sent a nervous chill down your spine. 

 "It's not…. it’s nothing."

 "Bullshit." Ivar spat. 

 Hvitserk nuzzled your temple, his voice lighter but still with an edge of steel in it. "I agree with Ivar. Something happened."

 Biting your bottom lip, you closed your eyes. There were a few things that were just too painful to talk about and this one, they had unknowingly stumbled upon. 

 "Was it your mother?"

 Your eyes flew open, your head snapped over to stare at Ubbe in shock. He met your gaze unflinchingly, and somehow you knew he already figured at least part of it out. He accidentally overheard a phone conversation between you and your mother one time and once you got off the phone, he immediately pulled you into a bone-crushing hug and promised you never had to see her again if you never wanted to, that they would take care of you. Of course, you cried all over him after he promised that. 

 Ubbe leaned forward in the recliner, placing his elbows on his knees, gaze still intent on you. "What did she do?"

 "She…. she hated when I sang. Said I was just desperate for attention. That I needed to just shut up. That no one would want to listen to me anyway. If she ever caught me singing…. once she duct-taped my mouth shut."

 You could hear the gasps at your confession, followed by a round of curses. Hvitserk pressed a kiss to your temple, tightening his hold on you. Ivar squeezed your hands, still holding them within his own. 

 Ubbe nodded as if not surprised. He ran a hand down his face and sighed before stealing your gaze once again. "I have a feeling she wasn't the only one to hurt you."

 At this point, a silent tear trekked down your cheek. You sniffled, dropping your gaze down. "I had an ex who used to make fun of my singing. He used to say 'at least you're pretty'. When we would ride together listening to music, he would tell me to stop singing and 'leave it to the professionals'. At some point, it just….it was better to not sing in front of anyone. So I only sang in the shower cause I thought no one would hear me."

 Hvitserk turned your head, looking into your eyes. "Baby, listen to me. Your singing is incredible. We all love listening to you sing. Please don't be embarrassed about this with us."

 "I'd love for you to walk around the house singing, I could happily listen to that all day." Ubbe said, a tender smile on his lips. 

 "I second that!" 

 "Sig, you're only here on Sundays." Ubbe glanced over at his brother. 

 Sigurd shrugged. "So? I could listen to her sing all day. Maybe she should move in with me and actually be appreciated."

 "No! You're not stealing her from us!" Hvitserk said, practically cradling you against him, like a puppy afraid to lose its favorite toy.

 "It's not stealing if she wants to go!" 

 Ivar butted in. "I am more interested in this other shitty ex and mother...can I find them?"

 "No, Ivar. You have to stop threatening people."

 "Why?" He whined at you, tugged on your hands, your legs still across his lap. "You won't let me teach them a lesson so all I can do is threaten."

 "Also sounds like you have terrible taste in guys. Anymore shitty exes we should know about?" Sigurd asked, rocking his chair. 

 You figured at this point you were spilling all your dirty secrets so what was one more. "Um, I was talking to this one guy but when he found out I moved in here, he called me a whore for moving in with two brothers and told me I was a waste of his time." You softly admitted, having made sure none of them ever heard about that after it happened. 

 For a moment there was dead silence then….

 "I'm going to need his name right now." Ubbe said, malice dripping off every word. 

 "Yeah! Let's cut his tongue out! See what he says about that!" Ivar cheered. 

 You could not stop the laughter that came out. The idea that these brothers got so worked up over anyone that ever insulted or hurt you was both sweet and slightly infuriating, but mostly sweet. No one had ever cared about you as strongly as these four brothers. 

 "It's fine now. How about this? Next guy to hurt me, I promise I'll give you his name."

 "No! I want to cut this asshole's tongue out. Maybe slap him with it after!" Ivar smiled with a pure predatory look. 

 "I think you should just date one of us." Sigurd shrugged, watching everyone with a smirk. "Then you know he'd treat you right."

 "I like this idea." Hvitserk smiled, squeezing you lightly. "We would romance the hell out of you."

 "You guys are being silly. I don't even know what romance would look like." You giggled at the absurd idea. All the brothers were gorgeous in their own ways and could pick up any girl they wanted, why would they want you? Besides, your relationships were just platonic. "Is the interrogation over now? Want me to leave so you can get back to your game?"

 "Nope, you're stuck here." Ivar said, leaning on you now so you were sandwiched between the two brothers. 

 Ubbe chuckled. "We've told you before, you are welcome to hang out with us. Why don't we put in a movie?"

 After many arguments and some mild threats, a movie was finally chosen. You settled against Hvitserk, facing the TV, as you played with Ivar's hair, his head now in your lap. 

 As you watched the movie, you missed the silent conversation between the brothers happening around you. It was decided that your next boyfriend would certainly be one of them and in the meantime, they were all going to romance the hell out of you and make sure you understood how important and incredible you are. 

 Starting with making sure you sang whenever you wanted. 

#vikings #vikings fandom #vikings fanfic #vikings fanfiction #ivars heathen army #ivar the boneless #ivar imagine #ubbe #ubbe ragnarsson #ivar ragnarsson #sigurd #sigurd ragnarsson #hvitserk #hvitserk ragnarsson #vikings imagine #modern vikings #roommates #mzwrites

[buckaroosboogara]

911 week - Day 4:

“It’s always been you.” + love

(1700~ words, Buck and Eddie, blackout fic.)

@911week

"How long have we been here? Are you okay?" Buck asked, his throat begging for water.

"We have been here for," Eddie looked at his watch, the only source of light in the elevator. "3 hours."

"Are you okay?" He asked one more time.

Eddie's silence dragged for almost a minute before Buck spoke again.

"I need to know if you are hurt."

"I'm fine... physically." He finally said, taking air sharply. "The darkness and tight space... it reminds me of..."

"The well accident. Fuck."

The first thing Buck noticed when he woke up was that he was in a dark place.

It was hot, closed, and pitch-black. Tight.

He didn't like the implications of that.

He tried to move from his laying position only to be stopped by a stabbing pain in his skull.

Buck hissed as he laid on the floor again and a voice sounded in the dark, quiet but worried.

"Hey, hey, Buck, you are awake," The voice said out of breath. Buck felt a hand come to his shoulder clumsily and pat him. "Welcome back."

Buck grunted. His throat was dry and his mouth felt like sand, contrary to his skin which felt soaked in sweat. At least the pain was more bearable.

He turned on his back to sense the voice's owner, Eddie, sitting next to him on the floor. "What happened?"

"What happened was that we were helping a woman out of this elevator when the lights went off again and the elevator went down some stores before I pressed the emergency button." Eddie explained, with his breaths still shaky. "You hit your head pretty bad and I bandaged it with what I could. The radios don't work here, so I'm hoping Bobby will notice we are not out there with them."

Buck's hand climbed to his wet forehead where a piece of cloth was held to his skin with two pieces of tape. Rough but it would work.

"What happened with our coats' flashlights? And our helmets?"

"They ran out of battery, we used them for 8 hours straight Buck." Eddie yawned. "I took mine off as well as yours, this place feels like an oven. And the helmets... they are somewhere here."

"I kind of became desperate when I couldn't see or hear you. I haven't been able to look for them." Eddie huffed.

"And how long have we been here? Are you okay?" Buck asked, his throat begging for water.

"We have been here for," Eddie looked at his watch, the only source of light in the elevator. "3 hours."

"Are you okay?" He asked one more time.

Eddie's silence dragged for almost a minute before Buck spoke again.

"I need to know if you are hurt."

"I'm fine... physically." He finally said, taking air sharply. "The darkness and tight space... it reminds me of..."

"The well accident." Buck said with a huff. "Fuck, Eds I..."

"I am fine." Eddie forced out through his gritted teeth.

"Eddie-"

"No. I'm fine. End of conversation, we need to keep the oxygen."

Buck nodded although Eddie couldn't see him.

So he would of course avoid the topic.

He heard Eddie place his head against the metallic wall and breathe with difficulty.

Buck rolled his eyes, he knew how stubborn Eddie could be and he didn't need that in stressful moments like that one.

"Have any news about Chris?"

"Nope. My phone died like an hour ago," Eddie answered. "I couldn't find yours."

"Well, that's because mine is..." Buck muttered as he looked for the device on the back pocket of his pants. "Safe on my ass."

Eddie snorted a laugh and Buck smiled, mission accomplished.

The phone almost slipped from his hands and the air was taken from his lungs.

He turned it on and the light made him hiss. He could now see the elevator - it was indeed very small - and he could see Eddie, who was very much shirtless. His shirt was on his shoulders, missing the piece that was on his head.

"I-I guess I'll have to buy a new one. Great." He said, avoiding to look at the man by his side.

The device buzzed with a notification of very low battery, only 5%, and Buck noticed the screen had cracked in the fall.

"I could buy you one, after all, it's my fault that it's broken. Now give me." Eddie spoke and Buck did as told.

"So, what's the diagnosis doc?"

The former medic proceeded to turn the flashlight on and crouched in front of Buck to check his pupils.

"Pupils are matching, but you will need a CT scan once we get out of here."

Buck groaned again. He hated those.

Eddie passed Buck his phone but stayed still in front of him for some seconds.

Apart from being very much shirtless, Buck noticed he was very much pale and shaking. There was fear in his shiny eyes, which were scanning him in detail.

A hyperfixation.

Buck closed his eyes as he sighed, he should have known.

"Are you having a panic or anxiety attack?"

Eddie went back to his side feeling embarrassed and huffed a humorless laugh, "Honestly... I don't know. It just feels bad."

Buck shifted positions to look fully at Eddie. "It's okay. I'm here Eddie, I just need you to breathe. Will you do it with me?"

Eddie nodded, the world went black again.

His phone had died.

Eddie's breaths went faster.

"No, no, don't do that. You are going to hyperventilate and we don't want that." Buck grabbed Eddie's hand and squeezed it. "I'm here okay? I'm here with you. We are going to breathe together, how about that?"

"O-Okay."

"Inhale, one... two... three... four... yeah like that, and exhale, one... two... three... four..."

Some minutes later Eddie could calm down, the shudders went away with the cold sweat and they stayed in silence. Buck's hand was still tangled with Eddie's, on the other man's lap.

That encouraged Eddie to voice his thoughts.

"I... I hadn't remembered what it felt like until today. Not for years." He whispered into the air.

"I could have died. But I remembered a promise I made Chris once." Eddie turned his head to watch Buck. He found pitch-black that somehow made it easier to talk. "That I would always fight to come back to my family."

Eddie looked at the front again and simply said, "You are my family."

He felt Buck's body tensing by his side as he started stuttering. "I- I Eddie-"

"Why did you think I changed my will? I trust you more than I trust my own parents." He scoffed bitterly, squeezing his hand.

"I... I thought you only saw me as your best friend."

"If you knew..." he shut his mouth quickly. He had gone too far.

How could he have gone that far? Voicing his thoughts didn't mean telling Buck the truth about the things he felt for him. About the warm wave of happiness that washed over him every time they locked eyes. Every time Buck smiled. Every time Buck was with Chris.

The feeling of home never faded whenever he was with Buck, instead, it gained strength every time they saw each other.

"If I knew... what?" Buck asked and Eddie could feel his look on his side. His cheeks started to burn.

"Eddie-?" Buck was cut by hot lips on his cheek, giving him just a sweet short peck and going away. He gasped and Eddie tried to untangle their hands but Buck grabbed him tighter.

With his heart running wild on his chest, he reached a hand into the darkness and found a chest, he went up until he found Eddie's chin and clumsily made their lips meet halfway.

The kiss turned to be as good as a kiss in the darkness could be.

So unexpected, so romantic.

It was a mess. Both were a hot, sticky mess - in the good way, not the horny one - in a dark elevator at 5 am, sealing their mouths in their first kiss.

Buck loved it.

Eddie loved it too.

They separated to catch up with their breaths and smiled to the dark.

"If you knew," Eddie started, feeling Buck's head resting on his chest. "That it’s always been you, Buck.”

"I always saw you, Evan Buckley. For who you are, your good things and your bad things. I've seen your worst and your best, and I wanna be there for and with you in them for the rest of our lives."

"Ever since I saw you in the firehouse for the first time, since I saw you smiling in your car when we went to look for Christopher after the earthquake, since I saw you pinned under that truck... I have always known it's you. You who I want to experience life. You who I wanna watch Chris grow. You who I wanna marry someday. You who I wanna grow old with." Eddie answered with a smile.

"I love you too."

"Eddie... Oh god, all this time you... Fuck, I- I want that too." Buck chuckled, placing his hand carefully on his jawline and pulling him for another kiss.

"I love you."

The last thing they expected next was to hear the 118 outside the doors, having heard half of the conversation.

"As much as I love listening to you two getting your shit together-" Hen's voice cut through the elevator's doors. "And I really love it, we need to get you two outta there so, Albert! Bring the jaws!"

Then cheers were heard as both were freed from the elevator, coming out half hugging the other.

"You should have told me it would take you some hours in a sauna to get together! I would have gladly paid!" Chimney teased them.

"Amen, you said it, Chim." Hen agreed, making Buck seat on the gurney and transporting him down with the rest of the crew.

She checked both of them once they were in the parked ambulance and exclaimed to the street, "You all owe me 20 bucks each!"

The couple heard the whole 118 groan before they closed the ambulance doors and started making their way to the hospital, the light of the sunrise illuminating the city which was slowly recovering the electricity.

"You had a bet on us?" Buck whined from the gurney.

"Yup, and I just won. Took you three years and a month, but who's counting?" Hen smirked.

Eddie rolled his eyes fondly and took Buck's hand. "You can have all the bucks you want Hen. I already have the one I love."

(Tagging: @perfectlynervousbeard bc they asked me)

Chimney cried from the front, "Ugh, they are going to be that type of couple."

...

#911week2021 #:) #buddie #evan buckley #eddie diaz #buck and eddie #buck x eddie #911 the blackout #911 speculation #blackout fic #911 on fox #911 fox #soft #love #my fics

[thisisthehardestthing]

18+ Dark - BNHAREM collab

This is for the BNHAREM server collab! Please see the masterlist HERE

authors note: This is a choose your own adventure style collab. Please go read the amazing intro written by @iwvs-on-ao3​ in the masterlist! I hope you enjoy the below x

Warnings: gloryhole, watersports, blowjob

tags: @enjifuckersupreme​​ , @joyousandverywarlike​​ , @linestrider​​ , @pleasantanathema​​ , @present-mel​​ , @elektraeriseros​​

Above the thrum of the party was an equally dark room, the only light a variety of monitors, most showing a green to signify night vision, some flashing purple, green, blue, beiges, others a fully red glow. Bodies contorted on the monitors, a few were close-up and a few had a birds eye view of the entire room. One in particular, had a fisheye scope, someone was ushered in, head abnormally large, before turning left and right, and the door closed.

A late comer, Endeavor hated tardiness.

He grunted as he adjusted his thin rimmed, black glasses and glanced at the different screens. He gazed, unamused at the varieties of different ways heroes, sidekicks, and, under special supervision, villains, participated in sexual acts. He unmuted one of the screens, screams filled the sound-proofed room and he winced, instantly shutting the sound off once more. He peered at it, making sure it was consensual pain, before unmuting the next one. It was a cacophony of moans, grunts, echoing as though in an opera hall; the orgy was in full swing.

The Number One hero unzipped his expensive black tailored pants, the wool-silk blend pleating fluidly as they were pushed down his thighs, bespoke from Dior Homme. A large palm stroked his cock, hardening quickly to the lewd noises. He focused on a particular pussy, watching someone with a dick too thin to be his pound into whom he assumed to be Mount Lady. Her blonde hair was pulled back as she sucked off some kind of monster cock, a strange shape that leaked cum all over her face, dripping down to the bodies below her. He heard squelching, grunts, slaps against skin, and he closed his eyes for a few moments as he lazily fisted his cock, rolex glinting in the dim light; his goal was not to get off, but rather just to release some pressure, tension, stretch out his pleasure for the duration of the entire night.

It’d been a few years since Endeavor had begun to host these… exclusive gatherings. He never participated, only surveyed. Some sick part of him enjoyed watching, finding pleasure in all the kinks he provided. His eyes darted to other screens, watching a masked man contort in such a way that his back seemed to break to suck himself off, a woman fucked herself on her fingers for an audience, another one taking part in a seemingly endless train, cunt stuffed full of different types of semen. His cock especially twitched when he came across someone getting pissed on, marked in an erasable way, almost cumming in his hand as a loud moan echoed from the orgy screen in combination.

Fuck, he thought as he pulled away from his cock, lifting up the hem of his black cashmere turtleneck—it was dry clean only—to wipe his precum against his lower abdomen, careful not to get any on his branded clothing. He licked the leftover, humming with approval that his new diet plan helped his taste. He tugged the sweater off, revealing the black oiled leather harness underneath, and folded it neatly onto the desk.

Movement in the bottom right screen caught his attention and he saw you, shifting awkwardly in the four by four meter cubicle. You weren’t the usual person for that section, obviously not the regularly hired prostitutes and sex workers; where the hell did they find you? Endeavor grumbled. He’d specifically demanded that there would be no new employees, the roster approved by him alone, not after the press almost got wind of him and what he’d been orchestrating behind the scenes of hero life. The number one hero could not be seen as the head of a lucrative sex society.

Your hands, tiny from the camera angle, drew the outline of the glory hole before settling yourself in front of it on the pillows. The snort that left Endeavor's nose came out harshly, slight flames tickling his upper lip.

Amature, he couldn’t help but think. You’d learn quickly not to sit too close; there’s no telling what might come through that circular cut-out in the wood.

He muted the orgy, unmuting your cubicle and listened in. It was quiet, quieter than the other rooms, and he waited with baited breath for the first of the participants. The glory-hole was one of the more vanilla kinks in the estate, yet it was one of his favorites. Without knowing who was on the other side, he would sometimes try and guess. Your exhale brought him from his distracted musings, the rise and fall of your chest beneath a normal T-shirt seemed so innocent.

You were innocent, he realised with raised eyebrows, and he leant forward in his black office chair. It creaked under his mass, the straps of his harness bit into his shoulders as he readjusted his glasses to see you clearly. You better do a good fucking job, his reputation demanded it.

There was a knock on the wood, the signal that someone was on the other side waiting, and Endeavor watched with an intensity at the way your body flinched at the sound, he even heard a squeak that made his cock twitch. The first genital of the night poked through the hole. You were lucky, he mused, it was a normal dick that curved slightly to the right, normal girth, average length, underwhelming, so he let his eyes wander to the other screens.

He watched a few couples partake in shibari, the tying of intricate knots and designs well underway. The way the ropes twisted and turned had always piqued Endeavors interest, but he knew he was not a patient enough man to take part and would probably leave his partner in pain. A sudden grunt, moan and squeal switched his attention back to you, and now Endeavor was interested. It had barely been three minutes since you began and the guy had already cum?

He watched as you wiped cum off your cheek to shake your hand so that it dripped in a glob to the floor, the way you winced at the taste and finished an entire bottle of water—rookie, will have to piss soon—before setting yourself back up for the next person of the night. This time, however, Endeavor did not take his eyes off you for a second. He had never been more fascinated by someone sucking cock before. For someone that looked so normal, you had a real talent. Your cheeks hollowed just right, your head bobbed with a rhythm that made it impossible to look away from, it had him wondering how you would be with some of the… stranger genitals around, how those pretty lips would look wrapped around his monster of a cock.

Maybe he’ll let you taste it, just maybe. He had never taken part before, but there was something about you that he had to try out for himself. The next guy came in under five minutes again, but this time you swallowed, gagging and dry heaving with your face turned towards the camera.

Fuck, Endeavor thought, his hand fisting his length once more, the tears in your eyes made a fire burn in his chest, internally compared to the flames that danced on his body in his hero suit. You wiped your tears with the bottom of your t-shirt, flashing skin, a bra, lace, before you drank more water. Oh, how interesting, he mused. A lace bra with such unassuming clothes? Endeavor wondered if you’d planned that, just in case someone were to see you without your shirt. He thought about whether it was a matching set.

But his train of thought was interrupted when he saw a flash of light on one of the other monitors. He cursed, swiveling around to peer at it intently, before pressing a button to call in security. There was always some kind of fight that would break out, either if someone’s turn in a train was too long or if it was because someone didn’t consent to a sexual act. That’s the real reason Endeavor was in this room. Sure, he liked to watch, but he had to make sure it was safe, too. It was the secret to his success.

The rest of the night flew by. He watched all the monitors, with his eyes periodically glancing at you. He couldn’t believe the desire that sparked in his gut from seeing such a simple act. Then, burning jealousy, raging from out of the blue, when a few heroes—whom he’d keep unnamed—entered the cubicle to fuck you. He saw your cries, both in pleasure and pain, but you never once said ‘no,’ so he didn’t intervene. Endeavor could keep his emotions in check, no matter how badly he wanted to throttle Gang Orca for defiling anything but your slutty mouth.

He saw the rooms begin to empty, one by one, as heroes, villains and more trickled out, thoroughly fucked out of their minds, climbing into black chauffeured cars with tinted windows in the early morning, bliss apparent across their faces. There were always a few that stayed behind, those that understood what ‘aftercare’ was, taking time to soothe the elite prostitutes' aches, burns, welts, bruises and muscles. Most of those that took those measures were not who you’d expect; many were villains, underground heroes, those not usually in the spotlight that understood the importance of picking up the pieces after what was dropped, left behind.

Endeavor looked at your monitor again and ran his fingers through his short red hair, contemplating his next move. You were still in the booth even though no one had bothered you for at least an hour. The black lace underwear set you wore was bunched up next to you where it was almost ripped off your needy flesh. He saw inklings of dried cum on your belly, arms, hair through the high definition of the screen. It made him sick. He felt protective over your frail body, and in some twisted way, possessive. Like always, everyone ignored the glory hole at the end of the night. While most whores in the converted cathedral got some kind of soothing treatment, that four by four cubicle was always left in the dark, forgotten. And you were too.

The hulking mass of muscle sighed as he stood up, folded his glasses away and stacked it neatly on top of his sweater. With a final click of a button, he turned your monitor recording off, leaving a black square in its place.

**

You were exhausted, fucked, sore in all your holes, almost wanting to laugh at yourself and the predicament you were in. You couldn’t believe you did this for money. Was it worth it? No. Well, maybe? Granted, you could’ve refused, you were asked every time before your cunt was stuffed. In the moment, you wanted it. You just wished you weren’t so sore.

How long had it been since you were curled in the corner of the cubicle, knees to your chest? You shifted, feeling the dried cum on your belly crumble and flake, making you wince. Your eyes had gotten used to the perpetual darkness, and you reached for your bunch up underwear, using it to scrub what you could off you. You inadvertently pressed on your bladder, and with wide eyes, realized just how badly you had to go.

Fuck, you scrambled to your heels, feeling for your jeans and t-shirt, and stood to get dressed when the door behind you opened. The golden glow of the hallway filtered in, before a looming shadow darkened the space once more. You had never noticed that the pillows were a plum with golden trim before. You felt frozen to the spot, back to the door, clothing crumpled in your claw-like grip. The voice that washed over you raised goosebumps over your entire body, it vibrated your bones.

“Turn around,” he commanded, and your body twisted automatically, following his wish immediately.

Your mouth dropped open and your head tilted back as you gazed up at the Number One Hero, the orchestrator of the night, Endeavor. Your heart hammered in your chest, an uneven beat, and you brought the fabric in your hands to cover yourself, feeling too naked under his piercing stare. Even in the dark, the blue of his eyes shone as if lit by its own fire.

“Who are you?” Endeavor’s voice was weighted, like it contained all the authority in the world and you stammered out your name, lowering your head in a bow. You did not expect him to repeat it back to you, and your eyes shot up to stare at his shadowed mouth moving to taste the word on his tongue.

“This is your first time here.” Not a question, but you answered.

“Yes, sir.” There was a tug at the corner of his lip.

“For the money?”

“Yes, sir.” A flash of lightning in his eyes.

“Did you enjoy yourself?”

You paused, uncertain how to answer, a whirlwind had begun beneath your ribs in response to the storm standing in the doorway. Yet, you sighed, giving in to the truth.

“Yes, I did,” you heard thunder so you added on quickly, “sir.”

“Good.”

The word of approval sent heat licking down your spine, a pooling between your thighs, not for the first time that night, but you hoped it would be that last. Reluctantly, you met his analytical gaze, the shadows of the room swallowing you whole. Your body felt abused, tired, and you still really needed the bathroom. Endeavor grunted, running thick fingers through short hair, it began to flame, before he stepped in and shut the door behind him.

His tall frame overwhelmed the small space of the room, shadows danced in orange with the flicker of his fire. You gulped, smelt the spice of his cologne and absorbed the heat of his skin. Endeavor’s palms enclosed yours, peeling the clothing from your clutches to drop them unceremoniously to the floor. He watched as you shifted, weight transferring from foot to foot, raising an eyebrow.

“Am I making you uncomfortable?” he asks, the sincerity in his voice shocked you, and you froze, shaking your head vigorously.

“No, sir,” then with a whisper, “I need to go to the ladies room.”

The ladies room, he chuckled. So innocent, so polite, how cute, “you can hold it for a while longer.”

It wasn’t a mere suggestion, but a command. Dumbfounded, you nodded. You really couldn’t, but you felt this overwhelming urge to please him, make him praise you for doing a good job. What kind of spell could this man weave? His hands stroked up your arms, around your biceps, to massage the wound muscles of your shoulders. He wondered if your used sex would still be as tight as the knots in your back. His cock twitched at the thought, only one way to find out.

“I’ve been watching you,” he mused, digging his fingers into the soft skin of your neck, massaging the base of your scalp. “All night. It was interesting.”

He chuckled at the little squeak you let out. Rough fingers tilted your chin up as he leant down, lips inches away. You smelt some sake on his breath, but not enough for you to shrink away. Rather, you wanted to lap it up.

“There are not a lot of women that can suck a cock like you.”

His crude words made you groan, and his lips captured yours, pressing into your body hungrily. Your fingers splayed wide on his bare chest, feeling the tickle of chest hair beneath your palms. They were so soft. The heat emitting from his skin warmed your arms, it lulled you into a sense of comfort. You felt bold, reached around, and hooked your thumbs under the back of his leather harness to tug at it. His tongue traced the wrinkle down the middle of your bottom lip, and you parted for him to enter.

He tasted like smoke, a forest wildfire, and you sucked greedily on the warm tongue tasting your teeth. He moaned into you, the sound carrying the weight of his palms as he gripped the bare flesh of your waist to pull you tighter against him. He wanted to feel that mouth swallow a different muscle. He shifted you backwards, detaching your mouth from his face with a pop.

“On your knees.”

The command ripped through you, threatening to relax all the muscles in your gut, to release what you were so tightly holding. It was painful to concentrate on on your pulsing sex, to keep it in and feel the haze of lust overcome your thoughts at the same time.

“Yes, sir.”

You obeyed, dropping down for the umpteenth time that night. Endeavor watched as you stared up at him obediently through your lashes, your hands that were on his back trailed down to rest on his thighs. He felt the way your fingers tensed against his muscles, the way you strained to stay lucid. You waited for him to undo the button of his suit pants, he was the one in control after all, even if your resolve was crumbling with each passing second.

Endeavor had stroked himself all night, brought himself to the brink of release multiple times that night as he watched you blow dicks that weren’t his. The inflamed head of his cock was angry, weeping terribly as he pumped it with large hands. His lips curled up into a smirk when your mouth dropped open, in shock and hunger to taste him. He knows he would be the best meal you’d eat all night. He brought his cock close to your mouth, tapped it twice against your cheek. You licked your lips before tentatively licking a solid stripe from the base to the tip.

Hm, alright, Endeavor thought, relishing in the way your tongue curved against the underside of his length, pressing against the thick vein protruding from the silky skin. You had just begun, but this pleasure was manageab-oh.

Your tongue swirled around the head, starting at the very tip, circling the slit and lapping at the pre-cum. The circles got larger, and when your lips tightened around his flesh, his eyes shot open to stare down at your concentrating visage. He could see the way you struggled to fit his girth in your mouth, but you were just that skilled. Your lips folded around your teeth, and you slowly swallowed. The plush wall of your cheeks slid around him, suctioning him in deeper as you sucked and moved. It wasn’t deep bobs of your head, taking your time to lubricate his cock, but god, the vacuum in your throat threatened to pull Endeavor down into your body.

Saliva began to dribble from the corner of your lips. Your mouth was so full, his taste so wild, your jaw ached already. Your thighs clenched together, the bundle of nerves between them throbbed to be played with, but you knew you couldn’t, not if you wanted to make a mess of yourself in front of the most powerful man in Japan.

“Fuck,” Endeavor swore, gripping the hair on your head roughly, as though reminding himself that he was not yet swallowed by you, but still in control. His muscles twitched, abs flinching upwards as his cock dragged against your tongue, as you sunk your mouth around him deeper. You were moving slowly, too slowly, and he pistoned his hips forward slightly.

The movement had you straining against him, taken off guard, but you remain relaxed, widening your throat as much as possible to take him all in. You stopped sucking, opting to feel him sheathed in your throat. You wrapped your left thumb in a vice grip, a small trick to help subdue a gag reflex. You didn’t know if it really ever worked, but it was a comfort to have.

The head of his cock pressed past the back of your throat, and he angled his hips slightly to accommodate the direction. For a deep throat, you would’ve preferred to lay on your back at hip height, but you didn’t complain. Tears pricked up at the corner of your eyes, drool escaped down your chin, and dripped onto your bare breast, nipples painfully erect.

Shit, he was almost completely inside your throat. He felt the muscle spasm before it relaxed. He wondered what it took to make you gag. To make you lose yourself.

“I’m going to fuck your throat now.” he warned, even though you couldn’t dispute it. You wanted it. You moaned around him, the vibrations splintered from your throat and into his hardened muscle. The fingers in your hair tightened their grip,then he began to move. His hips swayed back, dislodging the cock from your tight throat, before he thrust back in. His motions were fluid, careful at first, getting you used to the feeling of the heavy weight on your tongue, stretching your jaw. But you were greedy. You’d been swallowing dick’s all night, and your throat was plenty warmed up. You wrenched yourself from your dick, your voice like static as you spoke,

“Don’t go easy on me.”

Endeavor’s eyebrows shot up, shocked at your brashness, but he chortled nonetheless. A small burst of flames erupted from his nostrils before he yanked your mouth back to its rightful place: around his cock. You swallowed him hungrily, your hands gripping the firm hamstring of his leg to pull him closer, deeper, and he did not hold back.

He snapped his hips, feeling the way your lips massaged his length as he dragged himself out and back in. The velour walls of your cheeks shivered as you sucked, your tongue curling back and forth, pressing a hard tip to the vein before furling in a ‘w’ and cupping his cock as it slid. The room was sweltering, and as you sucked, it only got hotter in degree. You felt sweat trickle down the back of your neck from the exertion of keeping upright. The bones in your knees screamed, your thighs quivered from neglect. Endeavor wrapped a moist palm around your throat.

He felt how his dick stretched you out, before retracting. It was the most marvelous experience. Your eyes rolled up to the back of your head, he bent forward, a hand pinched at your nipple and found it covered in drool. The friction ripped a shudder through your body, and you almost lost control as your bladder clenched uncontrollably. You needed to make him cum before you could relax.

With new found vigour, you sucked him in, bobbed your head and fondled his aching testicles. They jumped up in your palms, squeezing tightly together as you rolled them between nimble fingers. Endeavor grunted, thrusting into your willing mouth harder, losing himself in the feeling of being worshipped by you. He loved having someone on their knees, so subservient. But he wanted you to feel pleasure too.

“Touch yourself.”

Your eyes flung open, worried that you wouldn’t be able to handle the pressure to your groin. But you didn’t want to disobey. You dipped your fingers between your slick slit experimentally, almost collapsing at the gentle touch. Fire burned in your gut as your groin throbbed. Fuck, you had to go so badly. With your moistened finger, you rubbed small circles around your clit. The sensitive bundle of nerves instantly tingled, exploding into your body with a shock at the overstimulation of everything you had endured throughout the night.

Endeavor felt how your throat clamped down around him, tightening up as you toyed between your legs. He remembered the bottles of water you drank, the desperate look in your eyes when he had told you to hold it. He did say just a little bit longer. He was getting close, thrusting erratically into your jaw, the tip of your nose brushing against the hair of his pubic bone. He slowed when you spasmed around his length, the lack of oxygen making your head swim. You were drowning.

With each scintillating stroke to your clit, the pressure in you climbed higher, higher, threatening to burst. Endeavor joined your ascent, on the brink of explosion. His command came out in ragged bursts.

“Give in to me.”

It was so simple, the order ripping through you like a wave that spilled onto the shores of ecstasy. You came at the same time that you relaxed, no longer able to hold it back. Warm liquid poured out of you, dripping down your hand, leaving your thighs wet with your piss. There was no smell, the amount of water you consumed made it clear. But it reflected orange in his flame. As it poured out of you, Endeavor released his spill inside your mouth, down your throat, and you gulped it down hungrily.

You were hot, cold, ashamed and so, so far gone in your orgasm. The embarrassment that clawed its way up your spine threatened to curl you inside yourself, but the Pro-Hero kept his grip on your hair. He had pulled out from between your lips. Adding to the heat on your skin, his chin erupted into a beard of flames, lighting up from a sunrise glow to a midday glare.

He took in your dazed gaze, the glazing over them as you stared up at a heavenly light. He tucked himself back into his pants, zipping and buttoning up quickly. He stooped low, wiping at the leftover cum and drool on the corner of your mouth, your lips swollen, almost purple bruises left being sandwiched between your teeth and his cock. He sucked on his thumb, tasting himself like earlier. The diet was definitely working.

Warm palms smoothed down your hair, caressed the muscles of your shoulders as you stayed kneeling before him. You were frozen in place, fully aware you had just pissed yourself, all over your hand. It hung limp next to your body, drops collecting on the ends of your fingers before dripping to the floor. Filthy, what would he think of you. Tears fell down your cheeks and he wiped at them, wrapped his large arms around your waist to slowly pull you to standing.

The joint in your knees creaked as they stretched out, your footing unstable, but he held you. The fire on his face crackled above your head, a dim glow rather than a burning furnace. He could see that you’d never done that before, worried that he had pushed you a bit too far.

“Can I let go?” he asked, the weight of his palms grounding you. You nodded, following his body with your gaze as it shuffled to pick up your discarded clothing.

He folded your jeans, your t-shirt, your long discarded underwear and bra, tucking those safely into his pants pocket before flinging the others over his shoulder. With a single movement, he scooped you up into his arms, a large forearm cradling your back, shielding the side of your breasts if anyone would still be around, and under your knees. You were limp in his grip, shivering with the after effects of your orgasm, burying deeper against his warm skin. He felt the remains of piss drip down your legs, onto his expensive suit, but it didn’t bother him in the slightest. Only you were on his mind now.

He walked you back to his office, giving the top of your head periodic pecks, his thumb stroking the soft skin of your thighs and breast. You felt a bit more alive with each passing second, when the daze gave in to raw emotion: shame, arousal, a hurt ego.

Endeavor closed the door behind him, all the monitors of each room in the mansion empty, the lights on, making it seem innocent once again. He placed you gently onto his comfortable black leather desk chair, reaching for the jug of water to the side and a washcloth he had tucked neatly away in a drawer. It’s what he would use to clean himself up.

He soaked the washcloth with the water, aware of how it might be cool against your skin, so he pressed lightly. You whimpered, eyes snapping down to watch as this hulk of a man kneeled before you, your roles reversed.

“I’m sorry,” you whispered, voice hoarse from the beating it took minutes before. Endeavor caressed the soft skin of your thigh, the flames of his face fizzled out so you could see his clean shaven jaw. He pressed soft kisses into your skin, licking a stripe up the dried piss-streak, tasting its saltiness.

“Ssh, you did well,” he praised, cleaning you up delicately. His large hands seemed too clumsy to work so deftly, but they cleansed you thoroughly.

“I did?” you asked, heavy limbs moving so that you rested a hand in his hair, the other stopping the hand that wiped at the evidence of your shame.

“Yes.”

Your heart fluttered in your chest, coming to life once more at the thought of impressing the number one hero. When you were fresh and clean, he took your black panties from his pocket, slipping it around your ankles and dragging it up your legs with care. You lifted your hips for him to fix them properly, and he planted two kisses on your knees before he stood up. He kept your bra tucked away, pulling your t-shirt over your head. Your jeans were folded and placed on his desk.

“Can I take you home?” Endeavor asked you when he pulled you up to standing. Maybe not right now, but he still wanted to feel your pussy pulse around his cock.

“Yes, sir.”

#enji todoroki #bnharem server collab #enji x reader #endeavor #endeavor x reader #bnha #mine #my writing #enji #boku no hero x reader #fanfic #fanfiction #boku no hero

[alltooreid]

Dancing With Our Hands Tied

In order to keep Y/N safe from danger, Spencer vows to keep their relationship a complete secret from everyone they know. However, as their romance gets more serious, Y/N and Reid begin to realize that no matter how in love they are, they may have been doomed from the start.

A/N: Back at it with a hopefully very angsty fic! This is of course inspired by the Taylor Swift song, but you don’t need to be familiar with the song to read and enjoy! Also I made a playlist for this one shot, which you can find here (its best if you listen to it in order and of course you don’t have to listen as you read, but if you enjoy that kind of thing, I thought it would be fun). Additionally, in order for the timeline of this fic to make the most sense, I’m choosing to ignore the Lauren Reynolds subplot, because trying to incorporate it and explain it would be distracting and unnecessary in my opinion. Thanks for reading!

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem! Reader

Type: Angst

Word Count: 3.9K

Content Warnings: Some cursing, general fighting angst, discussion of pregnancy, brief mention of abortion (follow up is left intentionally ambiguous, based on your own desires and beliefs you are allowed to decide where that aspect goes (pro choice tings))

“I, I loved you in spite of Deep fears that the world would divide us So, baby, can we dance Oh, through an avalanche?”

Spencer Reid hated funerals. 

Somehow he felt he was always invited to one, and no matter how hard it was for him to be there, he always made every effort to go. So when Hotch had to plan Haley’s funeral, Spencer knew he had to go, no matter how much he would hate it.

He looked down to the grass as his supervisor cried over his now dead wife, the most emotion he had seen from him ever. He refused to look up and watch, although there were at least a hundred people there to mourn Haley, this moment felt innately private to Hotch. Spencer didn’t think it was his place for his eyes to intrude. 

So he stared at the lawn and got lost in his own mind.

Right then and there he realized he never wanted to go through what Hotch had to go through. No matter how many philosophers described love in the most beautiful, enchanting way, Spencer didn’t want it anymore. 

He didn’t want to go through a heartbreak, because how worth it could it be?

Of course, all information he had in his repertoire pointed to the claim that it was worth it. Yet he couldn’t pay attention to Oscar Wilde, trying to tell him that “hearts are made to be broken,” or E. A. Bucchianeri screaming that “grief is the price we pay for love.”

All he could see at that moment was the most stone-faced man he had ever known, breaking down in front of everyone he knew over the woman he loved. 

At that moment Spencer Reid vowed to completely give up on love. He would become the best profiler to ever live. People would compare him to Jason Gideon, but Spencer Reid would win every time. Spencer wouldn’t let himself be like Gideon and get so hung up over a person that he couldn’t ever work anymore.

So when Spencer left the funeral and went to bed that night, he was confident that he would sleep alone like that forever. It was comfortable like that and he was happy. Who needs to be in love?

Not Spencer Reid that’s for sure.

Well, until three months later, when Spencer Reid met Y/N Y/L/N. 

She was beautiful, and Spencer knew he wanted to get to know her the first time he laid eyes on her. 

But he was doing such a good job recently…. Even Hotch was impressed with his work ethic. The only one who had talked to him about his lack of emotion was Penelope, she seemed concerned when Spencer told her he didn’t want to meet let alone go on a date with the cute nerdy barista from her go to coffee shop. Spencer refused to reason with her, he was too focused on proving himself to Hotch and the rest of the team. 

Even though in the back of his mind, Spencer knew he had already proven himself to the rest of the team, now he just needed to be good enough for himself.

A truly impossible task.

But he was still trying to do it, so he didn’t talk to the barista at the new coffee shop he was trying.  

He wasn’t expecting her to try and talk to him. Maybe that’s why he was so willing to give up his own reasoning.  

“That’s a lot of sugar, sugar. Are you as sweet as your coffee?” she said, giggling as she did it. She knew the line was cheesy and stupid but she had been eyeing Spencer Reid since he came in and knew she needed to get his attention. Luckily, he couldn’t help but laugh.

Their first date was right then and there. They got distracted and talked till closing, Y/N’s coworkers noticing she was actually putting herself out there and deciding to pick up her slack so she could continue. 

“So are you going to call me Dr. Reid or were you just leading me on for 3 hours?”

“Of course I’ll call you, how else am I going to get you to watch Doctor Who?”

Y/N smiled, “Well I know this is kind of forward, but I have this art exhibit tomorrow, I would love to see you there. But don’t over think that! I’ve invited pretty much everyone I know. I have a bet to win amongst the other art students, whoever has the most people come to see them wins one of those giant Costco sheet cakes. I need that sheet cake Spencer.”

Spencer smiled, “Well, I am from Vegas . . . Maybe I could help push the odds in your favor.”

“Well I can’t wait to see you there. Tomorrow, 6 pm, I’ll text you the details.”

It was only when he laid down to sleep that Spencer remembered his philosophy on love, but strangely, he did not care. 

He may have been trying to freeze his heart, but Y/N was coming in with a blowtorch.

And he didn’t mind. In fact he unlocked the door to let her in.

So when he arrived at work the next morning, he fully intended on going to her art show. He thought about what flowers to bring her. . . was this a date? Was last night a date? Were roses too strong a message? He couldn’t do anything red, it was too forward. Pink? What if she saw it as stereotypical because she’s a woman, maybe she hates pink?! Yellow Tulips were safe, but if he got her yellow tulips then she would think they were just friends and Spencer didn’t want to be just friends.

His internal debate was interrupted by none other than Penelope Garcia, but not to interrupt their paperwork day with a case, but to make an announcement to the bullpen.

“Hello my loves! I have an interesting idea for some team bonding tonight, my favorite barista and dear friend has invited me to her school art show. Of course she needs the most support humanly possible, so you all need to come with me and look at cool art!”

“Who’s this friend of yours Penelope?” JJ asked.

“Oh Jayge you’ve met Y/N! She’s lovely and I’m sure an incredible artist. You guys will all love her!”

Suddenly Spencer remembered Hotch and his broken down faces at Haley’s funeral. He remembered his philosophy on love and his fear of heartbreak.

But he also remembered how alive he felt with Y/N. How the way she laughed like a little kid and how that made him feel giddy. He remembered how she was always so interested in what he had to say. He remembered that he really liked her.

And at that moment, Spencer realized that he did not have to choose between being in love and keeping his heart safe from the devastating heartbreak of seeing his true love die. He realized that the reaper could only find Haley because Hotch let people know they were together Because everyone knew of Hotch’s wife, she was in constant danger.

Maybe if he kept Y/N secret he could still be with her.

“Spencer! Did you hear me?”

“No, um sorry Garcia what did you say?”

“I asked if you were going to come to Y/N’s art show, you know you too would make such a cute couple! You should totally come.”

“I actually can’t, I’m not feeling well.”

She sighed, “That’s what you said last time I tried to get you two together 187 . . . Do you want to talk about anything Spencer? You haven’t been yourself lately.”

“I’m fine, I just have a headache. I don’t want to go out tonight.”

She rested her hand on his shoulder for a second, before following Morgan to the kitchen. Spencer knew she was going to say something to him, but he didn’t care. He had found the perfect solution to his conundrum.

And he knew exactly what flowers to send to Y/N.

Y/N texted him thirteen times, and waited an extra hour after the open house closed in case he showed. So although she went home empty handed, one person away from enough cake to feed fifty, she received a call from Spencer Reid.

“Hey, where were you tonight? I was looking forward to seeing you.”

“I’m sorry Y/N, something came up, but I have something for you! Are you still there?”

“Oh no, I just got to my apartment. I can send you the address.”

“I’ll be over as soon as I can.”

And five minutes later Spencer was at Y/N’s door, with Chinese take out and white peonies, a flower known for its apologetic symbolism.

Y/N blushed, “You didn’t have to bring me flowers Spencer . . .”

“Well I wanted to bring some to your show, but I figured this could be the next best thing . . . And maybe we could eat some of your Costco sheet cake afterwards. Sounds like a balanced meal to me.”

“Although I love that idea, I unfortunately came home tonight sheet cake-less.”

Reid frowned, “How close were you? Would I have made any difference?”

“Oh no!” Y/N lied, “I was way off, don’t even worry about it.” She smiled, “I’m just excited that you're here right now.”

Spencer blushed and looked down at his feet, “Well I’m excited to be here.”

Four months after that night, Y/N asked Spencer a seemingly stupid question while they were eating take out at her apartment. “Spencer, I love takeout and all but we haven’t gone out in public together since the first time we met. . . Call me stupid but I’m starting to wonder if you don’t want to be seen with me.”

Spencer sighed, “Y/N, it’s not that it’s just . . . complicated.”

“I just don’t get it. Am I the second woman or something?”

“No! Absolutely not! You are my one and only flower,” he said, smiling and then leaning in to kiss her nose. She giggled in response, but quickly remembered the serious nature of their conversation. “Y/N, you know what I do for a living.”

“I don’t understand what that has to do with anything.”

“Not too long ago, my boss was targeted by a serial killer who made it his mission to make his life miserable. In doing so he killed his wife. I just . . .  I don’t want that to happen to you Y/N. I think I’m falling in love with you, and I can’t put you through that.”

“Spencer . . . I love you too.”

So no matter how badly Y/N wanted to tell her family, or update her Facebook status, she respected Spencer, and although she didn’t completely understand his concerns, she wanted him to be happy.

So she spent ten more months like that, catering to Spencer Reid’s peace of mind. Pretending to smile as he told her stories of all the funny things his team members did, all about their partners, and their love lives.

A couple times now, Y/N asked Spencer if she could meet them, but Spencer always shot it down. When he first mentioned the idea of keeping their relationship a secret, Y/N had secretly hoped it would be one of those things that was forgotten about within a week or two. But no. It had been many, many weeks, and Spencer still didn’t want to be seen in public with her.

And by now that was all she wanted. To go on a real date, to introduce him to her friends, to actually be able to tell her coworkers that something did come from that guy she hit it off with.

Everyday, Y/N felt she did the same exact thing, she went to work, would come home and if Spencer was still in Quantico, she would convince him to come over. (They had been dating for over a year now, and Y/N had never been to his apartment. She didn’t even know where it was). If Spencer did come over, he would usually bring some kind of dessert with him, and they would talk and be merry in their own little secret oasis. A couple weeks ago, Y/N started to get this uncomfortable, uneasy feeling that encompassed her whole body, her whole being. Every part of her was trying to tell her that Spencer Reid was not the man for her. And even though she was still very much in love with him, she agreed.

Although she loved Spencer for the person he was, the man who brought her every different flavor of cheesecake from the bakery across town (one a day for fifty nine days straight), the man who begged her to make him a painting for valentines day instead of buying him a present, the man who cried when she did and laughed when she did and-

There were a lot of things to love about Spencer Reid, but there were a lot of things to hate about their relationship.

She hated the time she bought a gold locket in the shape of a heart, and put a picture of them in it so she could keep him with her all day long, and he made her return it because it could fly open and someone could recognize him. She hated the day she came home with a little beige kitten named Betsy and Spencer made her give Betsy to her sister so that he wouldn’t get cat hair on his clothes and have to answer a million questions. She hated the time Spencer missed her birthday weekend because he had a case and couldn’t give an excuse to why he couldn’t go. She hated that Spencer was her entire life, while she seemed like just an inconvenience to his.

And most of all, she hated that she loved him so much. Because deep down she knew that she could never leave Spencer Reid, but she also knew that there was no way they could last if nothing changed.

Just then Spencer knocked on her door, she had offered him his own key many times, but he declined because he didn’t want anyone to see it on his key ring and ask what it was for. She let him in, and right away his fun perky smile dropped. “You’ve been crying. I can tell.”

“Is that the kind of thing they teach you in FBI school?”

“Yes actually, but that’s not the point,” he said, dropping his bouquet of red chrysanthemums on Y/N’s coffee table and grabbing one of her hands with both of his. “Talk to me Y/N.”

She sighed, “I love you Spencer, but I just don’t know if we can do this anymore.”

“What do you mean flower?”

“Spencer we’ve been together for over a year-”

“One year, two months and five days,” he corrected.

“Yes, yes that. We’ve been together for one year, two months and five days but no one except us knows that.”

“Y/N I thought you were okay with that, I just want you to be safe.”

“I thought I was okay with it but,” she paused, afraid of what she wanted to say, “I’m not Spencer, I don’t want to live like this anymore. I love you, and I want to be with you. To really be with you. What happens if we ever get married, do we have to get eloped, would you even let us get married because you need someone else to watch? When do I get to tell my mom I’m in a relationship? What if you get hurt out in the field, and no one has heard of me, let alone knows to call me, and we never get to say goodbye? How far do you plan on taking this?”

Spencer grew flustered, “Um, I- I don’t know? I didn’t know you were even thinking about those things.”

“Do you think about those things? Things like getting married?”

“You’re the love of my life Y/N, of course I do.”

“Well then something needs to change. We can’t live like this anymore.”

“Things will get better Y/N, I promise you, we’ll start small but I’m going to make this better for you. Actually, um we can start right now,” he started digging through his messenger bag. After a minute, he pulled out a smaller gold heart locket than the one you had originally purchased for yourself. “I, um I was going to give it to you for your birthday, but I feel like now is the best time. I couldn’t find the same one, but it’s the same picture inside.”

She teared up, “I love it. It’s perfect. Here, put it on me.” She turned around and pushed her hair to one side so that Spencer could clasp the delicate chain around her neck.

They kissed, and afterward Spencer spoke, “I hate to ruin this moment, but I’ve had to use the bathroom ever since I got here.”

Y/N laughed, “Ok go, I’ll be waiting.”

While waiting for her love to come back, Y/N admired her flowers. Ever since Spencer began to get her different flowers to symbolize different things she had developed an abnormal botany fascination. She would always beat Spencer to explaining the symbolism of her latest bouquet, so she already knew the red chrysanthemum was a symbol of prosperous, passionate love in most countries. However she also knew that in Italy, chrysanthemums were a death flower, given only at funerals.

Part of her couldn’t help but wonder if some unconscious part of Spencer’s genius brain was beginning to feel the same way she did. Three weeks later nothing much had changed in the state of Y/N and Spencer’s romance. She was still unheard of in the eyes of the BAU and two nights prior Spencer had stopped her from calling her mother to tell her about him.

And then Y/N discovered her sick, uneasy, all over body feeling was not just her incredible intuition.

She was pregnant.

She had taken a couple of tests a while prior and could just now get into the doctor to get it confirmed. But it was official. She was pregnant.

As soon as the nurse confirmed it she broke down crying. And when she asked her a couple more questions, she broke down even further. “Are you currently in a relationship?”

“No,” she sniffed.

“Do you know who the father is?”

“I don’t know,” she sobbed.

“Sweetheart, I don’t know where you want to go from here, but there’s a lot more options that you may think. Everything will be okay.”

Y/N still cried the whole way home.

She spent the rest of the day thinking about how to tell Spencer, and then overthinking what he would say.

She knew Spencer loved children, but he couldn’t even manage to tell people she existed, how was he going to explain a long term relationship and a baby?

It would have taken decades for Y/N to prepare to deliver this news, but Spencer showed up at 8:19 pm.

“Hi flower! How are you today?”

“I’m pregnant.” She blurted out, she was not planning to do it exactly like that, but she panicked.

“What?”

“I’m pregnant Spencer.”

He sighed and ran one of his hands through his hair, “You could get an abortion?”

Y/N lost it. “Are you kidding me? Are you fucking kidding me Spencer?”

“I don’t think a baby is going to be very easy to keep a secret Y/N.”

“Is this how far you’re willing to go Spencer? You want to keep me hidden so bad that you want me to get an abortion? Are you insane?”

“You’re right, Y/N, I’m sorry, we’ll figure something out.”

“No, you’re wrong there Spencer. I’ll figure something out.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I can’t do this anymore. I’m done. I love you but, please just get out of my apartment.”

“Y/N please don’t do this, I love you, we can make this work. I know I haven’t been doing the best job for these three weeks, but just give me a little time and I promise we can do this.”

Y/N wiped tears from her eyes, then reached her thumb up to Spencer’s face, wiping his cheek. “Spencer, it’s not a matter of how much I love you or you love me. Sometimes, things just aren’t made to work out. We gave it a good run, but no matter how hard we love each other, I don’t think either of us is happy.”

“But I don’t know how to live in a world without you in it, flower.”

“I’ve never been in your world Spencer, after tonight, nothing in your life will drastically change. You don’t have to worry about living in a universe without me because you’ve already been doing that for 15 months.”

“Please don’t do this, can we just give it another try?”

Y/N wrapped her arms around him, “That’s all we’ve been doing.”

The couple stayed in silence like that for a couple of minutes before Spencer spoke. “Can we just stay here for one night. I can’t believe I never got to do it.” Spencer had never spent the full night at Y/N’s place because he always worried that he would forget to answer his phone and the team would try to come to his apartment to tell him they had a case.

“You know we can’t do that Spencer,” she sighed, knowing she had to stay strong and act on her own best interest, but she also loved Spencer. “But you can stay here, if you want.”

He thought for a moment. “Okay, um do I need that key you always offered me? To lock up when I leave?”

“No, the front door locks automatically when you close it, you just have to make sure you have everything before you go.”

And so Spencer slept in Y/N’s bed, for the first time, without her in it.

And Y/N called the one person she knew Spencer would never try to track her down to to avoid exposing himself.

Penelope Garcia.

She of course let Y/N stay with her for the night, and although she would eventually, Garcia did not pry when Y/N said she didn’t want to talk about what was going on. So Y/N walked to her apartment with peace of mind, she knew that although she had a lot to think about, for the time being everything was going to be just fine.

On the way to Penelope’s apartment, Y/N saw a flower vendor. She couldn’t help but stop by and pick up a bouquet for Penelope, but more so for the symbolic meaning.

Daffodils and daisies.

The flowers of new beginnings.

“I'd kiss you as the lights went out Swaying as the room burned down I'd hold you as the water rushes in If I could dance with you again”

- Thank you for reading! Please reblog and let me know what you think :))

holly’s tiny taglist: @reidingmelodies​ @hercleverboy​

#spencer reid #spencer reid fanfic #Criminal Minds Spencer Reid #spencer reid angst #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid x reader #reid #Criminal Minds Reid #reid fanfic #reid fanfiction #reid x reader #spencerreidxreader #reidxreader #reid x you #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x y/n #reid x y/n #Criminal Minds #criminal minds angst #criminal minds fanfiction #spencer reid taylor swift #spencer reid one shot #reid one shot #criminal minds oneshot #reid angst #spencer reid unhappy angst

[icequeenbae]

Desert Flower (m) Ch. 2 | BBH

Pairing: Baekhyun x Reader x Baëkhyun

Characters: EXO and X-EXO (not all of them mentioned)

EXO vs X-EXO dynamics, complicated relationships, angsty, action, smut (as usual)

Warnings: sorta mingling with your ex’s ‘evil twin’, mentions of blood/ violence (nothing too graphic… I suppose), Y/N gets teary a lot(?), explicit content, rough sex, unprotected sex

Word Count: ~13.5k (full), ~3.4k (Chapter 2)

Summary: Baekhyun, your beloved boyfriend of three years, suddenly breaks up with you and disappears from the city in an attempt to protect you. But leaving you alone and clueless means trouble will surely find you. For it is easy to spot a flower in the desert.

Masterlist   >> One >> Two (m) >> Three (m) >> Four (fin)

Author’s Note: This chapter is going to be a little different! There’s angst, there’s drama, there’s smut... You will find out what I meant by ‘complicated relationships’ 🤭 Don’t forget to share your thoughts^^

Tags: @blahblahblah-boo​ @baeklightsx​ @wooya1224​ @baekklove​

Chapter 2. Get him back

The day he left you it was pouring, and in your mind, it rained ever since. Hours turned into days, days turned into weeks, and weeks flew by. You did everything on autopilot, without thinking or differentiating between tasks. Everything around you was a grey mess, and you couldn’t maintain a single thought in your head, not one thought that didn’t have something to do with the breakup.

Was it even that? He just left, telling you that it was ‘for your own good’. Asking for no opinions. Frankly, you were angry with him. You would've been furious, but it was hard to tap into your irritation when it hurt so much in your chest. For the first time in your life, you realized that you were gone too far. So far, that you felt like a piece of you was missing now. The one you’d possibly never get back.

You also realized that you belonged fully to that friend circle as well — there wasn’t even anyone for you to talk to anymore, or wallow with, which made your sorry ass feel even more pathetic. Your entire world revolved around your protective boyfriend of three years, and now that he was gone it felt as unsafe as ever. Who knows, maybe it was your sixth sense alerting you as to what was to come.

It happened over a month after your last encounter with Baekhyun.

You were lounging in the campus library, mostly because your weeks of heartbreak caused you to miss a few deadlines, so now you had to take additional assignments to do well at the finals. Having no inspiration, or better yet, no one to hurry to, made you stay there for long hours, barely managing to get one task completed at a time.

The space was almost empty since it was rather late, and looking around you suddenly felt a tinge of nostalgia. Muttering that you should get ahold of your stupid self, you walked slowly towards the tall aisle with your useless book. In the labyrinth, you wandered for a bit, reminiscing of the first interaction with your… now ex? Your first boyfriend? Your first love?

The thought left a bitter taste in your mouth, and you opted for walking further as if surrounded by books you could somehow block your bubbling feelings out.

A strange sound caught your attention.

No idea why, you kept walking towards it, soon stepping around the corner and freezing on the spot.

Only a few feet away there was a couple making out. The girl was pressed harshly into the shelves and grunted, as her partner shoved one hand underneath her shirt to squeeze her breast, and his other one grasped her neck, adding to the obscenity of their misplaced passion. You were ready to flush tomato red and vanish on the spot when you noticed something… familiar.

That side profile.

You would never mistake it for anyone else’s.

Wide-eyed in shock, you almost jumped when the male turned around, dark irises foreign to you. His eyebrow raised slightly as he took in your distress with half-lidded eyes, not even bothering to stop groping the girl.

‘B- Baekhyun?’ You said in such a tiny voice that you barely even heard yourself.

The sound of your book dropping to the floor ripped you out of the stupor, and you turned around. Out of the labyrinth you ran, not even bothering to put your belongings back into your bag neatly. You simply grabbed everything from the table and kept running. The surroundings were blurry, but you could see one thing clearly – his lustful eyes, mocking your naivety.

It hurt too much. Unable to hold your tears till you make it home, you found yourself locked in the stall of the nearest bathroom. The way you cried there was almost physically painful, and you struggled to catch enough air as you did. Nor did you care enough to prevent yourself from making noises. Your whole body was shaking with your sobs, and you weren’t entirely sure you hadn’t gone crazy just then. From seeing what you saw. From reopening the still-hurting wounds and seasoning them richly with salt.

However long it took you to dehydrate yourself with the seeping sorrow, you managed to stop, hiccupping only every now and then. Finally shoving your laptop and notes into your bag, you got out of the stall. Walking up to a mirror on wobbly legs, you gasped at your puffy face and red swollen eyes. Not that you really cared, but it was quite late, so you had good chances of sneaking out and getting home unnoticed.

Unless someone would be purposefully waiting for you to show your face, of course.

You took notice of the dark figure across the hall momentarily after exiting the bathroom. Turning the other way, you increased the pace of your steps, almost breaking into running speed to put some distance between the two of you.

‘Hey,’ a voice called from behind, and you felt a hand grabbing your upper arm to stop you.

The nerve he had.

‘Don’t fucking touch me!’ You barked at him, ripping away from his grasp fiercely.

He blinked, letting go, and you almost hiccupped again at the sight of his hair – even more silvery-white now than when he left you, slightly unkempt (from the prior activities, no less). As he opened his mouth to say something, you beat him to it.

‘Don’t talk to me. Don’t even look at me. You make me sick!’ You spat, wanting to both claw at his beautifully sculpted face and to snivel pathetically again. Instead, you turned around and took off before he gathered himself enough to try initiating a conversation again.

Because… What the fuck was he thinking?

***

You fell ill. It probably wasn’t unrelated to what happened at the library, but you became so feverish that your roommate was on the verge of driving you to the hospital. Three days later your fever finally broke, however, you felt weak and drained and depressed for another week afterwards.

Staying at home, you kept rewinding back to the ‘event’. How could he? Coming back like that, and not even having the decency to not screw around right under your nose. You were repulsed by what you saw, and it was almost hateful how the heaviness in your chest only worsened. The bitterness of the situation added to it – he lied to you, just to be with someone else weeks, or, perhaps, even days, hours after. Maybe all of it was a lie, you didn’t know anymore.

This Baekhyun… You didn’t think you’d ever known him.

The subsequent week you avoided all of the crowded areas of the campus, dreading that you’d have to face him again. It would be impossible to maintain your calm in that case, so you took all of the possible precautions. But what could you have done if he was looking for you?

Upon your following encounter, you failed your attempt to vanish out of his sight the way you did before. It was essentially you walking into a trap, as you headed home rather late after finally squeezing your last important assignment out on paper. Not giving the outside world a single moment of attention, you stopped at the top of the stairs to put your phone into your bag and zip it up.

‘Aren’t you a mystery woman, Y/N,’ the voice almost made you drop your stuff.

You glanced up, taking notice of the murky figure, leaning onto a nearby tree. As he began walking in your direction, you turned on your heels and took off. It felt stupid to run from him like this, but you absolutely did not want to break down in front of him. You wanted to preserve at least some dignity.

As you flew down the stairs, you stumbled and almost dove headfirst to the ground. Thankfully, a swift limb wrapped around you before you could do that.

‘Are you dumb?’ He exclaimed into your ear.

‘Let go of me!’ You writhed in his hold, trying to free your body from the illusive familiarity of his touch.

‘You’re a danger to yourself! What the fuck,’ he swore under his breath, releasing you at once.

‘I told you to leave me alone. Do whatever you want, just stay out of my freaking life, Baekhyun!’ You yelled in his face, fuming from his shameless behavior. Why was he acting like nothing was even wrong with this?

‘Unbelievable. Your twin screws someone over, and you’re the one held accountable,’ he rolled his eyes.

Twin… what?

‘What are you talking about?’ You asked in bewilderment.

‘I believe, introductions are in order. I’m Baëkhyun, nice to meet you.’

***

That was… embarrassing. So embarrassing.

You had no idea there was, well, a live copy of Baekhyun walking around. And even though your ex-boyfriend was secretive, you couldn’t believe he left something like this out. Were you an actual joke to him?!

Ba��khyun said they weren’t particularly close. He explained to you that he hadn’t seen his twin in years, and his friends helped him obtain the little knowledge of his whereabouts that led him here. Thinking he could find Baekhyun by asking around he… got ‘involved’ with a girl or two. Or a dozen, who knows? But, apparently, your reaction the first time you’d met piqued his curiosity. When you flushed at the memory, apologizing profusely, he only said that he found it odd and strangely cute, the way you got upset with him.

‘I’m not as great of a guy as Baekhyun,’ he shrugged. ‘Not that I’m trying to be, anyways.’

You frowned.

After the way he left you, Baekhyun was not at the top of your ‘greatest people of all times’ list either. You could understand why your new acquaintance mentioned this, you had witnessed enough to gather that he was not at all well-behaved. Also, his ways of extracting information… Not very professional, to say the least. But who were you to judge? Now that you’d learned that he wasn’t your ex, you were genuinely ashamed of the hysteria of the past couple of weeks.

But Baëkhyun was different.

When he got your number and promised to text, you didn’t think much of it. You hummed and rolled your eyes – as if that was going to happen. Yet he surprised you by sending a quick message the following week. And then… you just kept talking. Which went on for a while, whilst you’d grown slightly addicted to it. Somehow, Baëkhyun became the only person who could take your mind off of his twin. So, even when you finally went on the long-awaited summer break, you stayed in touch with him. And not only via text – you’d been seeing each other on a regular basis.

Randomly at first – you’d just bump into him somewhere around the university premises, and he’d then suggest grabbing coffee. But as it progressed, you ended up inviting him over for dinner. Partially because you felt acutely lonely with your roommate gone, and partially because… you missed him. It was hard to put a finger on it – you’d initially thought that it was just misplaced longing for Baekhyun that pushed you towards his twin, and it felt so wrong. Almost like you wanted to use him to soothe the ache in your heart that had been bothering you ever since your ex-boyfriend had left.

Yet Baëkhyun seemed so magnetic. He hypnotized you with his blue eyes, which changed from the icy light color to dark, almost black, and were just as sharp as his twin’s. And his sassy smirk – the one he had plastered across his face almost always. Baëkhyun wasn’t warm like Baekhyun, yet there was still something about him that had you walking willingly into his trap. Maybe it was the mysterious glint in his eyes as he looked down at you or the way he sized you up whenever he caught a glimpse of you, like you were his prey. Being alone with him felt both dangerous and exciting, and you kept fooling yourself, basing your blind trust on nothing but his relation to your ex.

You never noticed how quickly he managed to build trust between you. And how you didn’t even know much about him, yet you did tell him a lot. Like that one time, he asked you where you thought Baekhyun was.

‘Wouldn’t I like to know,’ you chuckled, sadness in your voice. ‘He just left. I don’t think he even kept his phone.’

‘I always said he was the dumb one of the two. And to think that he’s the strategist,’ he snorted, splayed on your couch comfortably.

You looked at your hands in your lap, subconsciously calming yourself by playing with your fingers.

‘Stop,’ you shivered as his palm covered your fidgety hands. ‘Stop thinking about him.’

Eyes traveling to his face, you caught a glimpse of the frown that formed there.

And then he kissed you. Out of the blue, giving you no time to think or pull away.

And you let him. Grabbing at the soft leather of his pants, you allowed him to do as he pleased with you. Baëkhyun tasted familiar, though his kissing was anything but – rough and messy, lots of tongue and teeth, making your head spin with flaming passion. You didn’t resist when he pulled you into his lap, or when he ripped your clothes off, item by item. He was not asking and you were not thinking. It didn’t feel like something you should stop at the time. Rather, you thought you would’ve cried had he paused for longer than a second, so you kept clinging to him in response.

The demanding grip he had on your thighs only made you crave it more, lust seeping into your system as you wrapped your arms around his neck and rolled your hips into his. He emitted a deep sound, helping you grind on him.

‘Good girl,’ he gritted into your lips, landing a slap or two on your ass along the way.

As you kept going, your bare breasts grazed his skin, and your panties became soaked and sticky. You were probably flushed rosy red as you chased the tight feeling in your lower abdomen, his eyes hungrily taking in your frenzy. He slapped you again, a sharp hit resonating through you like electricity.

‘Baëk,’ you half-moaned. ‘Please fuck me-’

You couldn’t even believe that you were begging him like that, out loud. But the desperation grew as your body threw itself at him, demanding release.

He moved your panties out of the way, fingers instantly getting wet with your arousal.

‘Such a needy little slut,’ he murmured, making you shiver.

It was all new. The name-calling, the manhandling, the way he bit harshly into your lower lip and tugged at your hair. And somehow, it was exactly what you needed.

He didn’t waste much time to prep you, opting for taking his already hard length out and running the tip between your folds, making you jolt and cry out, nails digging into the back of his neck.

‘Sink on my cock and take what you want. Like a bad girl would.’ He addressed in a low voice, smearing the remainder of your lipstick over your mouth with his thumb. ‘Wanna be a whore for me?’

‘Yes,’ you muttered, and he smacked you on the ass again, emphasizing that you needed to be louder. ‘Yes!’

He let go of your hips, hands resting on your legs, allowing you to slam down on your own. You whimpered at the slight burn but kept going. Moving this fast wasn’t the way you were used to doing it, but all the more exciting for that. Using his shoulders to steady yourself, you worked your hips hard. A sheen of sweat on your chest glimmered as you increased the pace, wailing as his tip nudged at your cervix. He watched you with his dark blue eyes, hands kneading your ass, and filthy mouth guiding you.

‘Squeeze your tight little hole.’

Meanwhile, you struggled to maintain the tiresome pace, yet held onto the sensation of his girth pressing against your walls as he glided in and out of you.

‘Ah fuck, Baëkhyun!’ You moaned, feeling the tickle of perspiration making its way down your abs.

‘I know you’re close.’ He licked his lips seductively. ‘Want me to help?’

‘Yes, yes, please,’ you keened, leg almost cramping from the uncomfortable position.

‘Leave your begging for another time, baby. Like I said, if you want something, you should take it.’

You whined, head spinning at the suggestion. His eyes, expectant, traced the stubborn crease between your brows while you kept rocking your hips. Then, you did the first thing that came to your blurry mind. Your hands reached up to grasp his hair and pull hard, tilting his head back and leaving the long column of his neck exposed for the attack of your lips. Sucking a bruise on it harshly, you then used your teeth to ensure he’d have a bright mark in a few hours. Creeping up his neck and his jaw, you licked at his lower lip, and then into his mouth – like an animal would.

‘Oh,’ he smirked, hands seizing you and holding you down, with him snug inside you. ‘So, my good girl is not as innocent as she seemed?’ He teased, the lustful glint in his eyes boosting your confidence to the level of insolence.

‘Shut up,’ you replied firmly, sliding off of him and flopping backwards to finally get some circulation in your legs. ‘Stop slacking off and make me come, you asshole.’

His eyes flashed at your brazen words. Shoving you roughly until you were flat on your back, he grabbed onto your thighs, dragging you closer to him. Instantly you cried out as he landed two consecutive slaps on your pussy, holding his heavy hard-on at the base. Pleased with your reaction, he did it again, not saying another word before he bottomed out inside you. A new wave of arousal washed over you, and you clenched around him, eyes fluttering shut. He didn’t even think to spare you the morning soreness as he nailed you like an actual whore.

‘Ah right there, right there- oh fuck, Baëkhyun,’ you sobbed, clawing at his flexed arm, when he placed one of your legs over his shoulder and leaned forward, basically stretching you open for himself.

This position made you feel vulnerable, like you had no choice but to take everything he was giving you, but it was what you needed. His every thrust resonated inside, making your muscles clench, and ripping more curses and moans out of you. Even though his pace was rather brutal, there wasn’t too much pain along with it – Baëkhyun knew all the right spots.

Mouth agape, you arched your back in silent agony, and a few more hits of his thighs later came so hard that it almost made you pass out on the spot. The hand over your mouth muffled your scream, and he let your leg slide off of his shoulder, pressing his palm against it to keep you in place and prevent you from closing your knees.

Muscles contracting uncontrollably, you whimpered at his continued thrusts as you became too sensitive from the drawn-out pleasure, tears soaking your lashes by the time he finally pulled out.

Baëkhyun grunted lowly, and you opened your eyes to witness him jerk himself off at the sight of your swollen, fucked out pussy, not even blinking until thick ropes of his semen painted your lower belly.

Despite having just performed a thorough fucking, he lowered himself on his elbow slowly and brushed the rogue strands of hair away out of your eyes.

‘You’re a naughty one. I love it,’ he murmured, positioning one of his hands on your neck as he kissed you deeply. ‘Don’t worry, I’ll teach you how to be in control.’

And so, you let yourself fall down the rabbit hole. And there was no telling what you’d gotten yourself into.

>> Chapter 3

A/N: Whooo, Baёk is here, stirring some kind of trouble, isn’t he? 🤭 Our poor Y/N-ie is walking on thin ice. What do you think of their relationship? Feels a little bit like cheating, right? Technically it isn’t. But still, the darkness is always pretty seductive...

#baekhyun smut #byun baekhyun smut #baekhyun x reader #exowritersnet #baekhyun x you #icequeenbae fics #Desert Flower #exo smut #baekbaёk