#i need to like. engage more with this pairing

[asapeveryday]

Breath Me In

Pairing: Paige Bueckers x Reader

Warnings: Smut (Fingering), weed, alcohol

Summary: Uconn’s end of summer party brings you all sorts of highs.

A/n: can you tell I like party settings??? Anyways. We need more fics of Paige receiving instead of always giving pls!! Someone please this girl!

Summer is coming to a close. Long August days turn to colder September nights, and the students of Uconn have mostly moved in for the new semester. A new year of college calls for a party.

Uconns annual end-of-summer party was an absolute staple to attend for seniors, richer students who lived in housing nearby often responsible for hosting. Summery rap and pop blasting, coolers and twisted tea by the gallons, string lights in big green backyards, patio furniture overrun by couples making out or slowly sobering up. It was a sight to behold, and you relished in the feeling of this, the beginning of the end of school.

When you make your way throughout the house, various people stop to talk to you, including the hostess herself.

Stella DeSantos is a trust fund girl who’s in her senior year for sports marketing, and this years lucky party organizer. She has the means, obviously, because the house is massive.

“So… gonna start the year off with some dick or what?” She laughs, already tipsy.

You just smile and shake your head. “I’m chill right now.” Is your reply. Honestly you just didn’t want to pull the ‘id rather have pussy’ card on her.

The girl swings an arm around you. “I could set you up with some really athletic guys if that’s your thing.” She hiccups. “Want a drink?”

She thrusts a mango white claw into your hand and you take it reluctantly. As much as you loved getting wasted the party was a bit too rowdy to feel comfortable. You were desperately searching for someone you knew well enough to hang out with that wasn’t already drunk, with no luck.

You stick by Stella for a while, standing by as she greets people and gets drunker by the minute. You’re still holding the same White-claw, though it’s mostly empty.

You’re scoping out the scene yourself, the house is filled with kids you’ve been in school with for the past years. Your gaze stops in the kitchen, where two girls reside. One tall with dark skin, hair slicked back and clothes baggy. You’d had classes with Aubrey Griffin before, she was intimidating but attractive.

The other girl was paler and slightly shorter, blonde hair tied back into a bun and glasses on her face.

“Paige!” Stella calls out, as if sensing your thoughts. She makes her way over to the two girls and you awkwardly follow behind. Everyone knows Paige Bueckers. She’s one of those students, everyone mostly likes her and she’s friends with all the right people. It puzzled you how someone so gay still attracted so many guys.

Stella talks to Aubrey and Paige, and they politely engage despite obviously being thrown off by how drunk she is. Their shared looks almost make you laugh. You take this as a chance to get a good look at Paige. She mostly stayed out of trouble or tough rumours, and kept to her main group of friends, so aside from her talent on the court you knew almost nothing.

You let yourself stare at her, noting her blue eyes, long lashes and wide smile. She carried herself confidently, but looked uncomfortable.

Finally she turns to meet your eye, and when her tongue flashes out to wet her lips you physically feel something in your stomach drop.

“You her babysitter or something?” She smirks.

“You’d think she knows how much she can handle by now.” You scoff. Stella barely notices, fully talking to Aubrey.

Paige’s eyes dart to the drink in your hand. “Good luck finding a ride home tonight.”

Before you can respond, maybe by telling her your name or sparking better conversation, Stella’s attention is drawn somewhere else and she starts to drag you away.

You turn to get one last look at Paige, and internally celebrate when your eyes meet.

-

As the summer sun finally began to set, it got a little too cold for everyone to be outside. The inside of the house was absolutely packed, the music was louder and the air was thicker. The smell of smoke and sound of people was starting to irritate you, but for whatever reason you didn’t want to leave just yet.

Stella was nowhere to be found and you were sitting on the kitchen counter next to some other girls, quietly sipping some drink while listening in to conversations. The original plan of staying mostly sober was ruined by your boredom, and though you weren’t drunk you felt significantly warmer and a little more confident.

“Oh, it’s you again.” A voice says. You turn to see it’s Paige and your heart skips a beat.

“I have a name.” You reply, not caring if you come off rude. She doesn’t seem to care either, just raising her eyebrows at you. “And it is?”

You tell her your name and she repeats it to herself with a smile. “I’m Paige.”

“I figured.” You laugh. The alcohol was making everything seem like less of a deal, had you talked to her more before you probably wouldn’t have been so casual.

“You drunk?” She asks, leaning against the counter across from you. At this angle you’re pretty much looking down at her, she looks cuter with her eyes wide and head tilted slightly upwards. You almost let your imagination get ahead of you.

“Getting there. You?”

Paige shakes her head no. “You don’t seem like much of a drinker.”

With a shrug, you say “This party is less fun than I thought it would be.”

“I’m gonna head outside if you’re tryna come.” She shrugs back.

You hop off of the counter and are reminded of the fact that Paige isn’t short. She seems happy that she’s not looking up at you anymore.

“Sure, why not.” You smile.

She leads you to the backyard and the sudden quiet is surprising. The music is muffled and the air is fresher, it’s a beautiful night and the yard is empty for the two of you. Paige heads straight for the pool, sitting down by the edge of the deep end and taking off her shoes, letting her legs dangle in the water. You join her and do the same.

“So you came to a party and you’re not drinking or getting high?” You ask her.

“Ah ah,” she smirks. “I’m getting high for sure, jus had to be a little sneaky. You can keep a secret, right?” Paige tilts her head at you, and you almost melt right there and then.

“I’m great at keeping secrets.” You eye her, tilting your head like she does. “But can all those people?” You gesture to the kids inside the house.

“Everyone in there is gonna be too drunk to remember me sneaking out for a blunt with a girl.” She finally breaks eye contact, reaching into her pocket for a tin of pre-rolled blunts.

She said ‘with a girl’ like her being with you could be a topic of conversation. The thought makes your mind race.

When Paige lights up and gets the first hit, her whole composure loosens.

The blue from the pool water reflecting onto her face, the slight glow of the blunt against her lips, the way she blows the smoke afterwards. It’s driving you insane.

You stare at your legs in the water, her pale ones next to yours. The night is beautiful. She’s beautiful. You wonder if she’ll remember anything tomorrow.

“Want sum?” Paige interrupts your thoughts, holding out the blunt. You know you shouldn’t mix weed with alcohol, but your heart is buzzing and her lips had already been on it, so you can’t say no.

Taking it from her nimble fingers (which you cursed yourself for even noticing) you inhale, letting the smoke fill you up before letting out a long breath, trying to ignore her sharp eyes on you.

“I’m surprised I haven’t noticed you around before.” She says, taking back the blunt. You let the statement linger in the air. For every hit you take, she takes three. Her cheeks are flushed and her eyes are already slightly pink.

“Are you not the noticing type?” You ask.

Paige’s eyes meet yours. “Are you?”

You laugh and take the blunt from her, holding the smoke in before tilting your head back and blowing it into the night sky.

“I notice a lot of things.” you say, glancing at her lips before meeting her eyes again.

“Oh yeah?” She says quietly, analyzing your features. If it weren’t for the drinks and the weed, you would’ve felt like prey under her watch.

“Yeah.” You match her tone.

She’s closer than you remember her being. The air smells like weed and chlorine, but she smells like summer.

Nobody says anything, you just keep passing the blunt.

“What was your first time getting high like?” You ask her.

“Freshman year, me and some other girls on my team decided we were gonna do it together.” She chuckles and shakes her head. “Don’t know why we started with edibles, but we were still high the next morning.”

“Oh shit.” You laugh.

“Yeah,” she huffs “and we had practice that afternoon, must’ve gone through like 3 bottles of eye drops each. What about you?”

“Senior year of high school.” You cringe and she smiles at your expression. “My girlfriend- at the time, was kind of addicted. Didn’t seem like a big deal then, but she begged me to smoke and I did. It was whatever.”

“Girlfriend?” She asks.

“You’re surprised?” You chuckle. “Shit, you really don’t notice anything.”

“Shut up.” She flicks your shoulder. “Any girlfriend now?”

“Fuck no.”

“I feel that.” She blows smoke into the crisp air. There’s a moment of comfortable silence, you looking into the water and her looking at you, before she finally says “Can I try something?”

“Like what?” You ask.

You can tell her thinking is slightly hazy, she’s moving slower and her eyes are tired, it’s attractive.

“Lemme jus show you…don’t freak.”

Paige takes a hit, then leans into you. In an instance her lips are on yours, prying you open and exhaling smoke into your mouth, then she pulls away. You resist the urge to choke, but manage to exhale smoothly. Your lips tingle where she made contact with you, and you feel your face get red at her expression. Paige is practically entranced.

“Little warning would’ve been better next time.” You cough.

“We can try again if you want.” She smirks, and you roll your eyes.

Once again Paige takes a hit then leans into you, this time placing her hand on your face. She huffs the smoke inside your mouth and you gladly take it, now knowing what to expect. When she pulls away you don’t turn your head, you just blow out the smoke, letting it cloud both your vision and hers. When it clears she’s staring dead at your lips.

Her lips meet yours again, this time without any weed. She’s taking her time with you, tongue exploring your mouth attentively, one hand still on your face while the other finds your thigh.

Her hands are calloused and controlled against your skin, her glasses bump your face as you kiss her. Her lips are soft.

You let your hands wander too, dancing under her black t-shirt and gripping her waist. You can feel her abs, toned from her athletic lifestyle. You can only imagine the things you could do with her abs alone.

Her hand leaves your thigh and meets yours under her shirt, gripping your wrist she guides you to her sports bra, letting you get under it and feel her breasts.

She sighs into your mouth when you lightly pinch her nipples, her usually confident voice now almost needy.

Paige’s kisses trail down to your neck, licking and biting into your soft skin. You let your fingers ghost against her until they reach the waistband of her sweatshorts.

“Can I?” You whisper, eager to feel her.

“Fuck, yes.” She murmurs against you, sucking beautifully painted hickeys from your neck to your collarbone.

When your fingers rub her through her boxers you can hear her breathing change, and it’s doing things to you. Rubbing slow circles on her clit, you feel yourself getting wet.

“You let every girl down your pants, Paige?” You mumble. She stares up at you, eyes wide and bloodshot.

You relish in the way she bites her lip when your pace quickens, you can feel her slick through the boxer briefs and you can’t help but tease her. “So wet already…”

Finally you let your hand slip into her briefs, finding her entrance and teasing around her hole. Her hips jerk upwards, giving you room to move, offering herself to you. “Stop talking.” She grumbles, cheeks pink with embarrassment.

You connect with her lips again as your fingers finally dip inside of her, causing her to let a soft moan out. You realize suddenly that anyone inside the house could come outside and see you two, but with all the weed and alcohol you couldn’t care less, you couldn’t stop now, not when Paige was grinding against your fingers and letting out sweet whimpers into your mouth, her hands feeling you all over.

Breaking the kiss is the best decision you make, because you can actually see her. Her face is perfect, hair falling out of her bun, glasses sliding down her nose, her expression a sexy, needy pout, her tongue darting out to lick her lips.

You pick up the pace, pumping your fingers in and out of her and grinning as her whimpers get a little louder. The noise of her slick, her voice, the crickets outside and the muffled music is almost magical to you. Her blue eyes shining and glossy from the weed and the reflection of the water.

“Fuck.” She murmurs, covering her mouth. “Oh, fuck.”

Her hips are violently bucking now as you curl your fingers inside of her and use your thumb to apply pressure to her clit. Her eyes are screwed shut now, and you can tell she’s close.

“Gonna cum for me Paige? Cmon baby, let it out.”

She calls out your name, legs open and pussy throbbing against your fingers. Finally she loosens around you, reaching her orgasm.

She’s still clinging to your body and catching her breath when you pull your hand out from her shorts, licking your fingers like you’ve just finished a meal. Paige’s eyes are trained on your lips wrapped around the same digits that were just inside of her.

You just smile at her staring. “You good?” You ask her. She just chuckles and takes off her shirt. “I’m good. Might needa cool down though.” Paige eyes you as she slips into the pool.

You laugh and take your shirt off too, slipping into the cold water with her.

It’s a good night, filling your lungs with her, breathing Paige in.

#fanfic #fanfiction #paige bueckers #paige bueckers smut #uconn wbb #smut #paige buckets #paige bueckers x reader #paige x reader #Paige Bueckers x reader smut #rpf #Spotify

[wileys-russo]

alexia putellas ,,you cheated" Game night with the putellas family

dirty cheat II a.putellas

if there was one thing nobody could deny about your fiance, was that she was competitive, about almost everything.

even in every day domestic life with the two of you she found things to compete over though most of the time you'd not engage and she was just competing against herself.

who could brush their teeth the fastest, who could fold the laundry first, who could wash their plate up faster, who made the bed quicker, if there was a task that needed to be done alexia found a way to make a competition of it.

which is why the fortnightly game nights with her family were all the more amusing, for you anyway.

"mi hija's! bienvenido, pase pase." eli hugged you both as alexia kissed her mami's cheek, the shorter woman ushering you inside where you could already hear the sounds of the rest of her family in the other room.

"ready to win again princesa?" alexia murmered with a wink, drawing you into her side and kissing your temple as you only chuckled with a playful roll of your eyes.

"she sure is hermana, but with a better partner!" alba grinned, tugging you into a tight hug and sticking her tongue out at her older sister who looked on unamused as alba's arm remained slung around your shoulder.

"like she would choose you over me alba, realmente!" alexia scoffed, shoving her sisters head to the side and making her way into the living room, cheers of greeting ringing out as she did so.

"so, partners sí?" alba grinned at you as you raised an eyebrow at the twinkle in her eyes. "what are you up to al?" you asked suspiciously as she feigned offence, hand smacking against her chest.

"me? nothing! just want to spend time with mi cuñada." alba smiled innocently as you only hummed, allowing her to drag you into the living room as you made your rounds greeting the rest of the family, tugged down onto the lounge beside your fiance once you had.

"hey! she needs to sit with her partner, right chica?" alba smirked patting the space next to you as alexia rolled her eyes, but her mouth formed an o of shock as you stood.

"amor!" the blonde huffed in offence with wide eyes as you sent her an apologetic smile and sat down next to alba, alexia's eyes narrowing into a filthy glare directed at her younger sister who just stuck her tongue out again.

your fiance pairing up with one of her cousins instead you didn't miss the way alexia's eyes strayed to you nearly every thirty seconds, a slight pout on her lips as you smiled and focused on the game.

as the night grew later and everyone had eaten dinner the games became a little more intense, and unfortunately for alexia so did her losing streak.

"me estás jodiendo!" the taller girl swore angrily as once again she lost, slamming down her fistful of cards on the table with a scowl as eli warned her about her language, some of the family having headed home the group was smaller now.

"see? i told you, better partner." alba whispered to you as the pair of you came in second, though you gave her a curious look at the wolfish grin on her face, rapidly realizing there was something going on here as most of the group also sported the same look at alexia's reaction.

your suspicions only peaked as yet again alexia lost the next round, and given it was the game she was normally best at your fiance did not take it well.

"puta mierda esto es una puta broma!" the footballer stood to her feet, throwing her hands around and seething as you stood to try and calm her but alba pulled you back down with a shake of her head.

"alexia! take five." eli ordered, the blonde stomping out of the room with her arms crossed and you winced at the sound of the bathroom door slamming and her mami hurried after her with a huff.

"what did you do alba?" you murmured quietly as things began to be set up for the last game of the night, the smirk unable to be wiped from the younger girls face.

"nothing!" she sung out happily as you gave her a look and she chuckled. "i maybe just made sure the odds for everything was a little more in our favour and a lot less in alexia's." alba confessed as you sighed but smiled, knowing that if anyone knew how to push alexia's buttons it was her sister.

"she's going to kill you." you patted her shoulder as the girl in question returned, eli warning alexia again to keep a lid on her temper as she sat back down stone faced glaring at everyone.

"only if she finds out." alba whispered with a wink before standing to start the last game, everyone pairing off as this one was charades.

you couldn't deny that you and alba drew the long straw, your words picked were easy and you ended up scoring eleven in the time frame, alba squeezing you tightly and lifting you off your feet as you laughed and alexia cleared her throat.

"alba." her sister warned raising an eyebrow, the younger girl putting you back down on your feet with a roll of her eyes, the pair of you sitting back down as alexia and her cousin stood to take their turn.

you watched on as alexia acted out the cards, frowning each time her cousin guessed wrong and her frustrations began to show as her temper grew shorter and shorter.

"ehh football?" "no!" "skateboard?" "no!" "carrot?" "qué? no idiota!"

"times up! and you two got....three right." alba read out trying to hold back her laughter, alexia clenching her fists and exhaling shakily from her nose, her cousin sending alba a wink which was not subtle as the older girl caught it right away.

"puta de mierda!" alexia swore with a scoff, eli warning her again as her daughter waved it off. "you cheated. you all cheated!" alexia began to put things together, staring in disbelief at the grinning faces around the room.

"nooo, we would never hermana." alba cooed condescendingly and that seemed to be the final nail in the coffin as her sister lunged at her, you barely having time to dive out of the way as alexia landed on top of the younger girl.

"alexia!" you groaned with a shake of your head at your fiance as both girls fell off the lounge rolling around smacking and swearing at one another.

unfazed the rest of her family all stood and said their goodbyes, just stepping over the girls as they left until eventually it was just you, eli and a couple of their tia's helping to wash everything up.

"hey! you two." you yelled over their squabble, both girls pausing to look at you. "you, up! we're leaving amor, now." you pointed menacingly at your fiance who pushed alba away and scrambled to her feet, ignoring her sisters teasings.

saying your goodbyes to those left you pulled alexia away before she could take a swing at alba who continued to mock and pull faces, the front door closing behind you as you let go of her and marched off to the car.

"princesa!" alexia groaned hurrying after you, unlocking the car and trying to open your door for you as you quickly did it yourself and pulled it shut with a slam that had her wincing.

as she slid into her own side you faced forward, ignoring the way her eyes bore into the side of your head. "start the car alexia, i want to go home." you warned still refusing to look at her.

"bebita, come on!" alexia pleaded, poking and prodding at you as you squirmed and smacked her hands away. "mi amor, you know i am competitive!" your fiance defended, shrinking under the glare you gave her for the words.

"sí, and look at where it has gotten you. the butt of your families joke because your temper is so childish you cannot lose a card game without throwing a tantrum!" you scoffed as alexia huffed.

"i didn't throw a tantrum." your fiance mumbled with a scowl as you raised an eyebrow. "fine! maybe i am a little bit too competitive." she sighed as you rolled your eyes.

"just drive us home ale, i'm tired." you shook your head as the girl started up the car and you couldn't help but let a small smile grace your features as she leaned over to press kiss after kiss to your cheek mumbling an apology.

"vale putellas! drive,and then you can make it up to me when we get home."

#woso x reader #woso community #woso #alexia putellas x reader #alexia putellas #woso fanfics #woso imagine #woso blurbs

[qveerthe0ry]

Your Ride, Best Trip

Summary: You sleep with your boyfriend Marcus for the first time Word Count: 9,001 Pairing: Marcus Pike x f! afab! reader Rating: 18+ Explicit Warnings: 18+ mdni, first time, vaginal fingering, oral (m! and f! receiving), unprotected PIV, squirting, creampie, dirty talk, so much fluff, so much kissing Betas: @for-a-longlongtime and @perotovar as ALWAYS. Love you homies I'm kissing u both <3 A/N: I have nothing to say for myself this time

Marcus Pike is perfect. 

He’s your dream man. 

He’s sweet. He brings you flowers just because, and he’s remembered your go-to coffee order, and he never goes to bed without texting you goodnight.

He’s effortlessly kind. He offers to walk your dog for you when you aren’t feeling well enough to get out of bed, and he always does the dishes when you cook for him, and he makes sure his bathroom is stocked with all the personal products you use at your own place. 

He’s fucking handsome. His smile is straight and pearly white, and his big brown eyes warm you up, and the way his broad shoulders fill out those suits he wears to work never fails to make you weak in the knees. 

He’s so smart, and he’s so funny, and he’s all yours… finally. 

See, when he hadn’t so much as kissed you by your third date, you wigged out a bit. 

How could you not? He’d been so thoughtful and caring and all you wanted was to feel those pillowy, soft lips against your own. 

So you asked him what was up, and he told you.

Divorced. Broken engagement. A whole year of therapy to pinpoint what went wrong, what he could change, and how he could do better, how he could feel better. And then, he said, he found you— like fate— when he wasn’t even looking, when he least expected it. 

You had no problem taking it slow. You’re still convinced you’d wait forever for him, as perfect as he is.

After too many little dates to count, he told you he wanted to be your boyfriend, if you’d have him.

You told him you’d love for him to be your boyfriend, of course. You’d be crazy not too. 

And then he finally kissed you.

It was slow and hesitant, but it still made your heart race, made your stomach do flips. He cut it off before it could become anything more than chaste, and left your front door with a sheepish goodnight. 

You’ve kissed a lot since then. You never really enjoyed kissing that much, before. It always just seemed like a means to and end, a formality before moving on to other things. 

But now it’s one of your favorite ways to pass the time with him. Waiting for an Uber to take you downtown, finally getting to his place on Friday after a long work week, cuddling in bed together with an old movie playing.

You haven’t made out with anyone this much since high school. And you enjoy it, you do, but Jesus Christ, he’s been your boyfriend for three weeks now and you need him. 

It doesn’t help that he touches you like you’re the last person on earth. His hands are so big and they’re gentle and electric when they find the bit of skin just under the hem of your shirt. 

You think it’s going to happen, this time. Friday night takeout has long been abandoned in the living room. You’re in his bed, in his clothes, and his pinky is teasing at the waistband of his sweats that you’re wearing. 

His tongue in your mouth is making you dizzy, and there’s no more blood in your brain with all of it rushing between your legs. You whimper, and you arch against him, and you want him so bad but you can’t say it. You’d feel bad, making him rush when he’s made it clear he wants to take things slow. 

When his lips leave yours, you open your eyes, and find his pupils obstructing all the deep, dark brown you adore. 

You have to squeeze your thighs together for a miniscule amount of relief. He notices. Of course he does. Damn that Quantico training. 

“Sweetheart—”

His eyes flicker down to your lips. You’re sure they look obscene, red and slick from nearly an hour of him sucking and nibbling on them. 

“I’m sorry,” you whisper. 

You don’t know why you say it, but you are sorry. You feel so bad for wanting him like this, desperate and aching in his bed, over eager. 

“Don’t be,” he shakes his head and gives you a reluctant smile, a smile that tells you you’re going to fall asleep extremely sexually frustrated. 

But it’s fine. He’s so worth it. 

You give him a soft smile back, and lean in to peck his lips. But he pulls away with his brow furrowed. 

“What do you want?” 

His voice is gentle when he asks. So is his hand on your back, under his shirt you’ve claimed. But it doesn’t stop that fight or flight response from kicking in. 

“Nothing! Nothing, Marcus, I’m okay— I’m great. Just wanna cuddle.” 

But the creases in his forehead don’t smooth out, and his hand ceases the soothing circles across your spine. 

“You’re lying.” 

You sigh and close your eyes. 

“I’m not lying, I’m just— I don’t want to push you to move too fast.” 

You expect him to be angry. But when you open your eyes again, his own have taken on that puppy-like quality you usually love. Right now, it just makes you feel guilty. 

“I’ve been lying, too,” Marcus whispers. 

It’s your turn to scrunch your face up. Your blood runs cold, waiting for him to elaborate. A million scenarios run through your head at lighting speed— all worse and worse until your breathing picks up and you beg him with your eyes to just get on with it—

“I have a small dick.” 

His face is so flushed. He can’t meet your gaze.

He’s staring at the bedsheets between you, and you’re both just silent for a long, awkward moment. 

“I mean— the divorce and all that, it’s all true. And I did want to keep from moving too fast. But— the last few weeks I guess I’ve just been… stalling?” 

He finally looks up from the threads to gauge your reaction. 

“Marcus…”

“I get it, okay? If you wanna go. I know I lied, and you didn’t sign up for—“

“Marcus.”

You watch his shoulders raise and his mouth snap shut, and he looks terrified.

“I don’t want to leave. You didn’t lie. It’s just— you really think that would bother me?” 

He lets out a big breath, and the tension in his body eases up a little. 

“I don’t know. Most people were… bothered. I guess,” he shrugs. 

You cradle his jaw in your hand, let the day-old stubble tickle the pad of your thumb as you think about how to best navigate this conversation. 

Because saying ‘I don’t care’ seems too dismissive. But you don’t. You couldn’t possibly care less about what’s in his pants, when everything else about him has made you fall so, so deep already. But you don’t want to make it sound like it’s something you have to even bargain with, like the pros outweigh the cons, like it even is a con. Because it’s not. 

“I’m not bothered,” you finally tell him. 

He still doesn’t meet your eyes, in fact, he rolls his. 

“You don’t have to lie to me. It’s okay, I’ve heard it all. I know I’ve lead you on—”

“Jesus,” you cut him off, “what did— who made you feel this way?” 

He finally looks at you. His eyes are wide and he looks vulnerable and hesitant. You swipe away some hair that’s fallen flat across his scrunched forehead. 

“Everyone?” 

You sigh his name, and you’re tentative when you lean forward to kiss him, softly, when he lets you. 

He looks less terrified when you pull back. You try to smile, but this whole interaction has left such a bad taste in your mouth that it feels more like a grimace when your lips turn up. 

“That’s— Fucking awful, to be frank. Pardon my French.”

He chuckles, but his gaze falls away from your face again. His sheets are not that interesting to look at. 

“Really, Marcus. I mean— maybe if someone’s just looking for a hookup, then I get it. You want something specific, whatever. But why would you ever think you were leading me on?

All you’ve done is be sweet to me, and shown interest in me, and taken care of me. Unless you’re like, secretly an ax murderer, or committing some kind of major tax fraud, you haven’t led me on at all.”

He’s still not looking at you. Why won’t he look at you, and believe you? 

“I don’t want to sound dismissive. I understand you’re insecure about it. I’m insecure about some things too. I don’t want to invalidate that. But I need you to know that the last thing I care about is how big your dick is.” 

There. He’s looking at you. He looks a little mortified, but he’s finally meeting your gaze. 

“Really?”

You scoff. 

“Really really.”

A reluctant smile tugs on the corner of his pretty mouth. 

“Why?”

“Because— now, don’t go getting a big head about this— you’re perfect. Like, everything about you. You’re sweet and you make me laugh and you’re gorgeous.”

His face flushes, but he lets you continue.

“And I’m in this, with you. I want this to go somewhere. And I think we’re super compatible.”

“Me too,” he whispers.

“Good, so… we’re on the same page then.”

You watch him lick his lips, and his hand that’s been loosely draped over your waist finally starts back up, drawing little circles across the base of your spine. 

“And… There’s other reasons,” you mumble, voice low with a hint of mischief.

“Oh yeah?” 

“Yeah… For one, your hands.”

“My hands?”

He emphasizes his question with a squeeze of your hip, and you giggle at the way it tickles, and also with a bit of embarrassment. 

“Yeah… They’re uh… big. I look at them a lot. Honestly surprised you haven’t noticed.”

He huffs, lets his big hand travel further up the shirt on your back. 

“Your nails are always trimmed, and— your fingers are long and thick. I’ve thought about them a lot.”

He breathes your name, and now you realize you’re the one avoiding eye contact. When you look back, his pupils are all blown out again, and it spurs you on.

“And I love to give head.”

“Jesus.”

“And the bigger it is, the quicker I get tired. I could stay down there all night, if my jaw didn’t get sore.” 

“Sweetheart—”

“Really, it’s one of my favorite things, making someone fall apart under my mouth. But I hate gagging and choking my way through it. It’s tedious.”

He says your name again, this time with a warning tone. 

You bite your lip to keep anything from tumbling from your mouth unwarranted. 

“You’re not lying.”

His eyes dart back and forth across your face, and you shake your head in lieu of opening your mouth again. 

“Fuck.”

It’s the first time Marcus has cursed in front of you. Your eyebrows shoot up in surprise, and your clit throbs. 

“I’ve thought about you so much. Your lips, you have to know, right? How plump and full they are… I think about them at night, when I’m touching myself.” 

That’s convincing enough, apparently. Before you can embarrass yourself any further with your confessions, he surges forward to press those plush lips against yours and groans into your mouth. 

His hand flattens against your back and pulls, manhandling you closer to him. Your fingers find his silky hair and tangle in the strands, holding on for dear life at this shift between the two of you. 

You can’t muster up an ounce of shame. Finally, you have Marcus where you want him, pressed against you. You hike a leg over one of his, getting it between your thighs for even the smallest amount of friction. 

You feel him gasp, chest inflating to press even closer against yours. It’s a rush, finally getting this after waiting so long. 

Your hands scramble to get under his white t-shirt. His skin is hot, even against your sweaty palms. There’s so much to feel, the slight swell of his stomach, and the muscle of his flank, the soft but firm pecs. 

You whine when he pulls away from your lips. He shushes you gently, and you open your eyes to watch his slick lips and his hooded eyes and flushed face disappear briefly, just quick enough to shed his shirt. 

Smooth, is the first thing that comes to mind. His tan skin has no hair above his belly button, just the errant freckle here and there. His nipples are peaked, and you reach out to press your thumb against one before your mind catches up to the action, before you realize you’re gawking. 

But when your hand stutters against his skin and you look up at him, he’s smirking, amused and turned on. You falter a bit, mouth open while you search for something to say, some sort of excuse as to why you’re devouring him like you’re starved. 

He saves you though, with his low, grumbled voice. 

“I think about you, too. All the time.” 

You dig your nails into his soft skin at his admission, scraping against his chest. 

“You know that? You think I haven’t had you a million different ways in my head?” 

Your heart stops beating, and you stop breathing, and the heat between your legs only gets heavier and wetter. 

“You want me to show you, sweetheart?”

Your heartbeat comes back as a rush in your ears, and you squeeze the meat of his pec as you nod. 

He kisses you again, licks at your lips until you suck his tongue into your mouth, and now it’s just filthy. No more pretense, it’s been months of pretense, and neither of you have any more patience. 

His fingers seek out your own nipple, a tight bud protruding through cloth, and he rolls it between his fingers gently over the material of his shirt. 

“You come over and wear my clothes like this, and you think you don’t drive me crazy?” 

The words are grumbled into your mouth, against your cheek, then your jaw and your neck as he seeks out more of you to kiss. 

“I don’t wash them when you leave. I wear them and I smell you all day and it makes me feel insane.”

You mewl at his admission. Everything he says now is so fucking raw, now that you’ve broken down his walls. He shushes you again, grabs the hem of his shirt to help you pull it over your head. 

He curses when he sees you. It’s the first time. You’ve both been toeing this line of modesty, and maybe you’d be more nervous if you weren’t careening toward the pleasure he’s promised you. 

He coaxes you to lie on your back beside him, and his mouth works a slow trail down the side of your neck, nipping and suckling until he finally gets your nipple in his mouth. You arch into it, encouraging him with a hand tangled in his thick hair. You feel his groan reverberating around your rib cage when you scrape your nails back and forth across his scalp. You need him, like nothing you’ve ever craved before. 

“Marcus—”

“I know, I know.”

His syrupy voice isn’t as soothing as his lips, though, when he cranes his neck back up to kiss you again. He nips there, a sneaky distraction from the way his fingers trail down to circle your navel, and then even farther, teasing the hem of his sweatpants you’re wearing. His featherlight touch makes you jolt when it finally registers, your stomach jumping under his fingers. 

“Can I?”

You’re nodding against his lips, into the kiss, and then whining when his hand breaches the waistband. Those thick, long fingers flutter across your mound. Your breath catches on every wiggle. But when his fingers splay out, half on one side of your slit and half on the other, teasing your lips, you exhale hard and press up into his touch. 

“Oh, are you that sensitive?”

His voice is half-teasing, half-shocked, as he mumbles into the tingling skin of your neck. 

“It’s just you.” 

And it’s true. There’s no ego-stroking here. You’ve waited too long to get this and now you’re fiending, any touch is a relief. 

And he’s huffing into that skin under your ear, like you’re playing it up too much, but he bites down on the skin anyway and groans. 

“So sweet, huh?”

You make a disgruntled noise but there’s not enough blood in your brain to get your point across. Instead, you wrap your hand around his meaty forearm and force his fingers lower, where you know your underwear is a soaking, sticky mess. 

He curses and pulls away from his assault on your neck to look at you. You’re certain you know what he sees, blown out pupils and sweat-slick forehead and bitten, shiny lips. 

“That’s all for me?” 

There’s a sly smile tugging at one side of his mouth, just barely there, but you see it in the way one dimple grows more than the other. You nod in answer, scrape your nails up the hair on his arm and watch him shudder.

But he retreats from between your legs, and chuckles when you squeeze his forearm tighter in protest. The sound makes you shiver, all low and gruff and teasing. But he softens the blow with another one of his kisses, heated and sloppy and needy. His hands, always so gentle and careful and big, find the creases between your hips and thighs. It makes you arch up into the touch and whimper again, and you wonder briefly if you’ll ever not be desperate for him again. 

He watches your face twist up when he pulls away from you, watches the way your breasts move with every heave of your lungs. His dark eyes travel lower, where his thumbs sear circles into your hips, and his tongue swipes across his lower lip. 

“Can I take these off, sweetheart?” 

The tenderness in his voice fills you with a completely different warmth, white hot flames simmering into a blaze of feelings you aren’t sure you’ve ever truly experienced before. You let it consume you. 

“Yes, please.”

He hums a satisfied little noise as his fingers hook under the waistband. He takes his time, making sure to catch your underwear as well. It’s a sight, his huge hands working your only remaining cover down, down, until you’re bare to him and he’s gently cradling each of your calves to fully remove the last of your clothes. 

Those hands work their way back up, attentive, memorizing the valleys and peaks of your flesh, the nuances of your skin, the way it bends over your joints. Before you know it, he’s propped himself up beside you once again, one arm supporting his weight so his other hand can work its way between your thighs. 

You drag your eyes away from his fingers to look at him, only to find him focused on your face. 

It’s a few long moments before either of you move or speak or breathe. It’s you who breaks the spell, only because you know you’re at the very edge of control. 

“You sure you’re ready?”

You reach up to cradle his neck in your hand. It’s hot to the touch, and so are his ears, the tips of them burning a cute pink where your thumb grazes them. His eyes get softer and crinkle even more around the edges.

“I’m positive… can’t believe I psyched myself out for so long.”

He huffs and shakes his head at himself. You’re ready to kiss that apprehension away again, but his hand on your thigh pulls, as gentle as everything else he’s done, to spread yourself open for him. 

The cool air makes your breath catch in your throat. Or maybe it’s the anticipation. So close to what you’ve thought about every single night for weeks. Months– since the day you first met, if you’re being honest. 

He keeps his eyes on you, and you hold his gaze even though it burns. But only until his fingers brush you. Your eyelids flutter shut at the feeling, mouth open wide in shock at how electric just one simple touch feels. 

His finger glides so easily around your opening, and you hear him gasp as he explores all the slick.

“You’re soaked.” 

His voice is thick with awe, as another finger joins in on the fun, gathering up your arousal. But they don’t breach, and you feel like he’s teasing, readying a whine in protest. 

The noise gets stuck in your throat when they trail up, gliding through your swollen folds. They find your clit, full and begging for attention, and circle with hardly any pressure. 

Oh, he’s fucking good at this. 

There’s no apprehension in his movements. It’s like he’s read a fucking manual on how to press all your buttons. The light, slick touches are building up that heat in your gut quicker than you can ever remember with anyone else. 

You’re stunned silent, eyes pinched shut and your head tilted back into the mattress, digging in for even an ounce of grounding. 

“That feel good, sweetheart?”

Your vocal chords come back to life, finally, as you whimper from the gentle drag of his fingers. 

“You have no idea.”

He chuckles, and you open your eyes to see his own still trained on your face. 

“I think I do,” he mumbles.

He shifts, presses his hips into you, and the hard line of him digs into your side. 

You clench around nothing, and your clit pulses under the pads of his fingers. He curses and responds to the needy little bud, applying more pressure and speeding up those little circles. 

All the while he grinds his hips into you, soft little movements that sync up with his hand, and you want him so bad. You’re losing patience by the second, the only thing keeping you from pouncing is the way his fingers work you over so perfectly it’s like you’re touching yourself. 

You’re not, though, and that becomes perfectly clear when one thick, long finger presses lower and slips into you. It slides so easily, despite how much girth it has on one of your own. You both make stuttered noises at the feeling, and Marcus’ lips capture your own to let them mingle together. 

Your hips egg him on, lifting and shifting, but he is teasing now. It’s a slow drag in and out, his finger pin straight, and if he hadn’t been so diligent this entire time you’d think he didn’t know what he was doing. 

But you whine, a soft plea of his name into his mouth, and he obliges. That thick finger crooks up, just as the heel of his hand flattens against your clit, and stars bloom behind your eyelids. 

You groan, and he laps it up before his lips leave yours. 

“That’s it. This what you needed?”

A pathetic whimper comes out in response as you nod your head. His finger presses harder into that perfect spot, and his palm slides over your wet clit. You’re clenching around him, savoring the feeling of being filled by him, working your hips down and back to meet his motions. It grows and grows, that feeling in your gut, so close that you can’t be bothered to worry about what needy noises you’re making.

He mutters another frantic curse, and his hips jump to press his cock into you harder. 

“I gotta taste you, sweetheart. Can I? Will you let me?” 

You nod so fast you’re surprised your head doesn’t detach from your neck. He soothes that frenzied part of your brain with another kiss, slips his finger out of you, and moves to get between your legs. 

You thread your fingers through his hair to keep him still, even if it’s just for a moment. Your legs instinctively wrap around his waist, and the drag of his sweatpants across your sensitive center makes you arch up into him for more, to seek out more friction. 

He just huffs a laugh against your lips and angles his hips away, denying you the simple pleasure of grinding against the tent in his pants. 

“Not yet. Let me take my time with you. You’ve waited so long, right? I’ll make it up to you, you just gotta let me.” 

You huff. 

You should’ve known Marcus would be just as much of an infuriating tease in the bedroom as he is outside of it. The trivia dates and the cocky smirk he always sported when he won, the little bets he’d make on how a movie’s plot was going to twist, the refusal to ever let you pay for dinner— it’s all adding up now, and you can’t believe you didn’t expect it. 

Marcus Pike is a smug little prick underneath the humble, sheepish grins, and it’s hot and it’s yours. 

“Put your money where your mouth is,” you breathe. 

He chuckles and trails said mouth down the length of your naked body. You watch his plump lips explore your skin and leave wet patches littered in their wake, shiny little stakes claiming you. His five o’clock shadow is just long enough to abrade your skin a bit, delightful little pricks that make your muscles jump involuntarily.

He makes it to your mound before looking up at you. His brown eyes are mostly obstructed by his pupils, but they shine all glassy in the dim lamplight of his bedroom. His shitty grin has faded and he looks determined, and it steals the breath from your lungs. 

He teases some more, of course he does. His lips peck and tickle the creases of your thighs, the skin of your outer lips, and the very tip of your hood before you finally see his pink tongue slip out. 

All of a sudden you can’t watch, can only let your head fall back and close your eyes and drown in the anticipation. 

The pointed tip of his tongue just barely grazes you, tracing a razor-thin line from your dripping hole all the way to your mound. It tickles, and your breath comes in faster as he does it again, and again, and again. 

Just before you can beg for more, he flattens his tongue and drags it up your slit. He laps at your folds, slow and calculated, and the satisfied noises tumble out of you as you feel his taste buds glide against you. 

All you can think to do is find his hair and use it to hang on. Your legs spread wider, and he takes the encouragement. His tongue finds your clit, so swollen and sensitive with need by now. He circles it, then wiggles his tongue back and forth, playing with it, playing with you. He shakes his head from side to side to give you more, presses even more firmly, and the heavy feeling in your gut tightens tenfold. 

Your hips start to move on their own, rocking up into his face, helping his motions along. He groans with it, muffled and wet between your legs. 

A delirious thought gets stuck in your horny brain. You don’t know how you’ll ever let him leave this spot between your legs now that you’ve finally got him here. It’s so wet and warm and incredible, and your nails dig into his scalp to drive the point home, to try and lock him here forever. 

His voice snaps you from your reverent thoughts, thick and deep. 

“Fuck, sweetheart. You taste so good, looks so fucking pretty.” 

You brave a glance down at him, his red soaked mouth and his dark eyes that are boring holes into your pussy. One of his hands releases its grip on your thigh to glide across the dripping mess of your center. He toys with you, spreading you open with splayed fingers, watching the way your folds bend to his whim. With it exposed and protruding and aching for his touch, he leans down to wrap his plush lips around your clit and suckle. Curses fly from your lips at the concentrated attention, and it’s so so so fucking good you’re sure you’re going combust. 

His hand slips lower, and his mouth doesn’t stop, and you’re dangerously close to tipping over the edge. And then two thick fingers slip easily into you, immediately seeking out that spot inside you and tapping there. 

It’s blinding pressure overwhelming the two places you need him most. He drums up a rhythm that would remind you of a dance, maybe, if your brain were cognitive enough to form a coherent thought. Down with his head, engulfing your clit, and up with his fingers, squeezing that spongy spot inside you. Over and over, he works you with soft grunts against your cunt until your fingers lock up in his hair and your hips start to shake. 

“Please don’t stop,” you pant, “I’m so close.” 

To his credit, and this is more than you can say for the majority of men you’ve been with, he doesn’t stop. He doesn’t slow down, nor does he speed up. He keeps at you exactly how you need it, moaning strung-out little noises into your center until you’re dropping. 

All the wind is knocked out of you. Your hips jolt into his face and he takes it in stride, lapping at your clit when the seal of his lips is broken from your erratic movements. You tremble through it, clench around his fingers, and squeeze his head between your thighs as you ride it out on his tongue. 

As the shivers roll through you, Marcus’ fingers slow, and though he can’t remove his tongue from you because of how your legs have him in a headlock, he stills his tongue so you can take the last bit of what you need from him. 

His breathing is just as heavy as yours, wheezing out moans and muffled words of encouragement. When you feel yourself slipping down from your peak, you let go of the death grip on his hair, and open your legs, and grant yourself a few deep breaths before you dare to look down at him. 

He carefully, cautiously pulls his fingers out of you. A comforting ‘shhh’ is cooed into the sweaty skin of your thigh when you make a strangled sound. Both of his hands splay out on either hip, a light and grounding touch accompanied by the kisses he’s dropping all over the skin he can reach. 

Finally, you grant yourself a peek down at him. The first thing you notice is how his broad shoulders are, heaving with baited breath. Then, his normally pristine hair, sticking out every which way and then some from your frantic fingers. 

His face is red, you guess from exertion. Or maybe you really did restrict some blood flow. Christ. That’s what he gets, being so goddamn good at that. 

And then his lips. His lips. Those lips that up until now you’ve only ever kissed or dreamed of. They’re even more plump, swollen and slick with you, shining just like his chin is. 

You don’t know what to say. You know you want to kiss him. Funny, considering that’s how all this started, but you’re dying to see what you taste like on him. 

Luckily, he breaks the silence, after licking those delectable lips and clearing his throat. 

“So… How’d it compare?” 

Your face contorts on its own, surprised at the sudden and intrusive question. 

“Pardon?”

But then he laughs, pressing those wet dimples into your heated skin to hide them. 

“To all those thoughts you told me about. How’d I do?” 

You laugh too then, a weary huff of breath as you sit up. 

“Don’t go fishing for compliments,” you tease, though there’s not much heat behind it with how out of breath you still are. 

He goes to respond, but you get a hand in his hair again and coax him up. You meet him halfway, swallowing his surprised noise when you finally get those pillowy lips against yours and lick at them, his tongue, his teeth, until you aren’t sure what taste is you and what is him. Until you realize you’re flat on your back again as he hovers over you, still between your thighs. 

You both hum when the kiss breaks, and you rest your forehead against his, nuzzle his nose and sigh at the floaty feeling in your limbs. 

“Better,” you whisper. 

You feel his grin bump into your own. You nip at it, playful and languid as you finally begin to get some of your bearings back. 

And then you’re shocked back into the realization that there’s all this smooth skin right in front of you, this hunk of a man hovering above, the one who just melted your brain into a fuzzy little mold of itself. You grab his hips as he licks into your mouth and scrape your nails up his flanks, unhurried, while the touch makes him shiver. 

You feel out the strength in his pecs, those broad shoulders you often daydream about, and then you push. Catching him off guard, he gasps as he loses his balance and tumbles to the side, and then laughs when you press him into the mattress and straddle his hips. 

You laugh along with him, but it slowly tapers off as his hands find your naked skin— your stomach and hips and back and then your ass, where it hovers just above that bulge in his sweatpants. 

He’s looking up at you with what you can only describe as horny apprehension. 

His eyelids droop over his dilated pupils, but his brow is all pinched up in the middle. His mouth hangs open, like he wants to say something, but nothing comes out. 

So you kiss him, soft and gentle, as gentle as he’s been with you all night. His sigh washes heat across your cheeks, and you feel him relax under you just a little. 

But then you shift in his grasp, lower your ass, and press your soaking center to his crotch. You whimper at the feeling of his sweatpants dragging across your sensitive, wet cunt. He moans and bites at your bottom lip maybe a little too hard. 

But it’s okay. He pulls away and pants your name and you settle there, your weight pressed down on his cock. Your lips find that smooth patch in his stubble, biting that chiseled jaw, licking down the curve of his neck, his shoulder, up to his ear. You delight in every goosebump you draw, and breathe in his scent before you speak up. 

“Will you let me suck it?” 

All his breath rushes out in a big gust. His fingertips dig into your naked sides, and he nods. 

“Please.” 

It’s a barely-there whisper. You pull away from that silky soft skin where his pulse is hammering to check his reaction. 

He’s begging with his eyes. It makes you smirk, sitting up straighter, trailing your fingers down the front of his body until you reach the drawstring of his sweatpants. 

You’re still sitting on his groin, though. You give a little playful wiggle, and his hips rock up to grind harder. But you don’t want to tease any more. Every moment spent teasing him, you’re also denying yourself, and you’ve been patient for long enough. 

So you shift down the bed, nestled between his legs, and get to work on the tie of his pants. Every time your fingertips brush the hair below his belly button, he sucks in a breath. You finally get the thing untied, and look up one last time for permission before you start to drag the material down, grabbing his boxers as you go. 

Your eyes stay trained on his face instead of staring at his crotch, especially as he wiggles a bit and lifts his legs to remove his pants. You don’t want to stare, and you also don’t want to not look, you don’t want him to be uncomfortable at all with you. 

You want it to be perfect. You want to make him feel the way he makes you feel. 

He nods his head, and you cease averting your eyes to trail down his body, the bushy happy trail and the neatly trimmed hair above his cock and his cock. 

His little cock. 

It is, indeed, on the smaller side. Probably one of the smallest you’ve seen in real life. Three and half or four inches long, if you had to guess. 

And it’s so pretty, cut and on the thicker side, the slightest upward curve that makes your pussy tighten around nothing. 

You dive right in, press your nose to all the hair while you kiss at the base of him, humming when his cock twitches against the side of your face. He smells so good and clean, like always, but down here there’s even more of that Marcus smell that always lingers beneath his soap and cologne, salty and warm.

When you drag your eyes up to him, his head’s thrown back against the pillows, not looking at you. You want him to look, you want him to see how much you’re going to enjoy this. 

You’ll make him look, one way or another. 

For now, you just lathe your tongue up the underside of him, then back down to tickle his balls, all the while enjoying how his prick jerks under the attention. 

He’s making little noises, mostly puffs of breath and gasps, and his hands twist up in the sheets beside you. You grab one of them, slow and steady, and lead it to the back of your head. 

And then, you finally get your lips wrapped around the head of his dick, and you slowly sink down until he’s entirely in your mouth. 

It’s not until your nose presses against the flatness above his cock do you hear him release a strangled groan. That’s when you look back up at him and find him staring down, mouth agape, locked on your mouthful of him. 

You pull back up, wiggling your tongue as you go, memorizing the ridges and hairs and veins. Your eyes are locked on his, and his are locked on your lips, so you try to give him a show. 

You open your mouth and stick out your tongue, nod your head up and down to let his cockhead tickle your tastebuds. A gruff noise leaves him, hearty and hoarse, and you want to smile but you’re not in a position to. 

Instead, you flick your tongue against that little band of tissue just under his slit, and his hips stutter as his grip on the back of your head tightens. 

“Fuck, sweetheart.”

Now you do smile, your lips upturned against the head of his cock, and it jerks against your mouth while you kiss it, until you envelop it once more. 

You hum around him, at the weighted feeling of him occupying your mouth, how smooth it feels against your tongue and how nice it is to take him all the way in and not gag or choke or drool. 

It makes your cunt ache, makes you crave him even more, makes you want to be full of him everywhere. 

You reach a hand down to touch yourself. You’re still dripping, can feel it all slipping from your entrance and cooling your skin in the air conditioning. You’ve had just enough time to recover from the mess Marcus made of you. You’re sensitive but not too sensitive, when you trace your clit with your fingertips and moan around the mouthful of cock. 

“Oh fuck, are you touching yourself?”

Your eyes flicker open and look up to him. He’s clenching his jaw, grinding his teeth as his nostrils flare. You hum and nod your head to answer, his cock slipping back and forth through the ring of your lips. He whimpers, and his head tips back against the mattress again, and it makes you speed up the efforts on both him and yourself. 

He curses, soft little chants, kneading the back of your neck in his big hand as you suck him in over and over. You close your eyes and lose yourself in it for a bit, the way he slips so easily in and out, the way his hips move just a little, like he’s trying not to but he can’t help it. The sounds, his grunts and your sloppy mouth and your fingers working over your slick folds. 

He says your name. 

You hum, use your free hand to play with the fuzzy skin of his balls. 

He says your name again, and this time it’s urgent, almost panicked. 

“Sweetheart, stop, please.”

You do, immediately. You open your mouth wide and let him fall from your lips and unhand him while you look at his exerted face. 

“Are you okay?”

He huffs, and his cock bobs beside your face. 

“I’m so okay. I just— did you want me to…? It’s okay if you don’t, I just didn’t want it to be over—”

“Marcus.” 

His heated babbling stops as he clamps his mouth shut. His broad shoulders lift and drop with his heading breath.

“Do you want to fuck me?” 

You smooth your hands across the scattered hair on his thighs when you ask. His prick twitches again at your question. 

“I— Yeah. Yes. I do.”

He looks almost guilty about it, with his wide eyes and the bashful expression spreading across his face. 

“I want you to fuck me so bad,” you tell him, “I’ve wanted it for way too long.”

His breath leaves him in a shuddery exhale, something like relief or awe. 

“Yeah? You still want it?” 

His hand skates from the back of your neck to your jaw, his thumb brushing the apple of your cheek. 

“Please, Marcus. Give it to me.” 

You turn your head to kiss his thumb, a sloppy little peck before you take it into your mouth. You smile around it when he groans, and bite it before it slips away. 

“Can you get on the edge of the bed for me?” 

You can, but not without throwing a cheeky ‘yes sir’ his way. You’re not sure if the noise he makes is from arousal or a lack of  amusement, but there will be plenty of time to explore that later. 

For now, you do as he says. You scoot so your ass is just about to fall off the side of his bed. The wooden bed frame is the perfect height to rest your heels on, and as Marcus slips a pillow under your head, you’re as comfortable as ever.

The mattress dips when he gets up to stand in front of you. The lamplight from the nightstand is really doing things for him. The slight sheen of sweat on his chest glistens, as does the wetness at his temples where his hair is starting to curl up. All those lean muscles have never been more apparent than they are now, the golden glow creating beautiful shadows across his naked body. 

He’s so hot. 

It doesn’t help that his big, warm hands snake up your bare thighs as he gets between them. His small dick stands at attention, pointing toward the ceiling, and you feel your pussy spasm with anticipation. 

“Please,” you whisper. 

He nods, steps closer as you spread your legs wider and wiggle even further off the bed. 

“Perfect, sweetheart.”

He leans over you with one hand on the bed to brace himself. The other is wrapped firmly around the base of his cock, and he looks down to watch it as he glides it through your slit. 

“Are you ready?”

You nod and hum your affirmative. He takes the go-ahead and his cockhead slides across your clit, down, so slowly, until it catches on the rim of your hole and you both gasp at the feeling. 

You look down to watch too, lifting up on your elbows to see the moment your pussy lets him sink inside, fluttering around him, engulfing his prick one inch at a time. 

You knew it. You fucking knew his cock was perfect but still you’re shocked at the way the curve makes him drag across your upper wall. And when his hips are flush with yours, all that pressure is concentrated at that bundle of nerve endings inside of you, and you’re going to lose your mind if he doesn’t move.

“Oh fuck.”

You let yourself flop back in the bed, but reach for his hand that’s supporting his weight. Your nails scrabble for purchase against the skin of his wrist as you curse again, your walls contracting around him as you tense. 

“Fuck, Marcus, please.”

You’re so far past caring about how desperate you sound. You need him, the textbook definition of it; it’s an absolute necessity that he fucks you. 

He curses, and you realize you’ve closed your eyes. When you open them, his jaw is hanging and he’s looking at you, your face, like it’s something he’s never seen before. Like he’s shocked you’re here in front of him. 

But his hips are still, and you’re helpless to the way your own cant up to urge him, and finally he’s pulling back out. The slow drag against the most tender spot inside you rips a noise from your throat, involuntary. He pulls almost all the way out, until the head of his dick is kissing your opening and you can feel how he stretches the tight ring of muscles. 

And then in again, almost as slowly, and you’re already out of breath. The feeling steals all the wind from your lungs. It’s setting you on fire, perfect friction against just the right spot, the one that’s still tender and alight from your previous orgasm. 

“It’s so fucking good,” you manage to choke out. 

Marcus moans above you, and his hips snap into you, and his free hand finds your waist so he can dig his nails into your flesh. 

“It is, fuck, sweetheart, you’re so fucking good.”

A bead of sweat drips from his nose and lands on your belly, and that seems to make you snap out of it. 

“Fuck me. Fuck me hard, please, make me come.”

You watch his mouth quirk up into a pretty smirk, dimples on full display. 

“Yes ma’am.”

Your giggles only last for a moment, dissolving into a high whine when he slides out of you and back in, a harsh thrust of his hips that doesn’t let up. 

He fucks you. You try to watch; it’s too hot not to. His biceps flex respectively, one with his effort to hold himself above you, and the other where he holds you in place by your waist. 

His neck, the one vein there that’s protruding as he bares his teeth. The way his chest is rapidly rising and falling as he drives into you. His big brown eyes, even darker now as he succumbs to the feeling of you. 

But you just can’t keep your eyes open for long. It feels too good, you’re too close to the edge. Your insides are so tender and alight from the first time you came. Every single thrust inside you is taking you apart and building your second so quickly. Your eyelids droop closed and there’s already stars blooming behind them. 

His little noises are louder, like this. Grunts and gasps and moans, falling over you, all for you. 

“Fuck, I’m so close,” you warn him.

Your back arches to encourage his pace. His skin slaps into yours faster as he groans.

“Thank god, me too. What do you need, sweetheart?” 

Without a verbal answer to his strained question, you slip your hand down to press against your throbbing clit. 

“Shit, yeah, play with your pussy for me. I wanna— fuck— let me see you come. Looks so gorgeous.”

His voice is thick in his throat, and you work your fingers over yourself faster. You’re clenching wildly around him, you can’t help it. Every thrust in sets your nerves on fire, almost too much, but not quite. His grunts are turning into growls, uninhibited and primal. You feel the mattress shift and open your eyes to find him standing up straight. 

Both hands grab your hips now, and that little angle change makes him grind even harder into your g-spot, and you’re tumbling over the edge. It’s been building under the surface for so long that when it hits, it’s blinding. There’s static in your toes that washes over you, up, up, dragging a fiery heat with it that consumes your center and makes your head fuzzy. 

There’s screaming. 

You’re screaming. Your eyes are clenched so tight, as are your fingers, all your joints, your pussy, around Marcus as he fucks you through it with sloppy thrusts. 

“That’s it, oh my god, sweetheart, you— fuck. I’m gonna come, I’m— where?”

“In me.”

Your throat is scratchy when you answer, and you don’t have any time to elaborate on why that’s not a bad idea. You’re still coming, wave after wave of warmth rolling across your body, and you’re vaguely aware of how wet everything is, the sound of him fucking you even more obscene. 

His shout doesn’t quite rival yours, but you feel it when he empties inside of you. His cock jerks and and twitches, wringing out every little bit of pleasure from you, and you think you’re still coming, the pinpricks of pleasure are still too intense to be aftershocks. 

He stays pressed as deep as he can be as his stomach convulses and his thighs shake, just like yours do where they’ve somehow wrapped around him. Your eyes open again, and the lamplight is so bright now, his breathing is so loud. He grunts and pulls out a bit, then presses back in, and again, until it falters and his whole body slumps. 

His top half collapses onto you, his little breaths huff and tickle the tingling skin of your belly. Your own breath comes out in a weak moan, and it takes all the strength you can muster just to run your fingers through his sweaty hair. 

“Jesus,” he says.

Your name cascading off his lips in such a strung out voice that it makes you clench around him again. 

“Huh?” 

God, how are you ever going to move again? 

“You uh… Is that a common occurrence?”

Christ, why is he using such big words? 

“What are you talking about?” 

He clears his throat. 

“You like— You squirted?”

You laugh, one delirious huff. It makes his head rock on your jiggling belly. 

“I what?”

You gather the will to look down at him. His mouth is open, surprised and amused, and his eyes are shiny and bright. 

“Yeah, like, a lot.”

He’s still inside you but softening, and his own chuckles make him slip out. 

You lift up on your elbows as he stands up straight and the evidence is clear. The hair above his dick and high on his thighs is all dark and soaked. 

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry.”

The sheets on the edge of the bed are absolutely ruined, and you pray he’s one of those men that has a mattress protector. You’re more than a little mortified, and the way he’s staring at you, silent, is beginning to make you squirmy.

“What?” 

“Why do you seem so surprised?”

His fingertips are feather-light across your thighs, and you shiver. 

“I’ve never actually… done that? I would have warned you.”

He makes a pained sound, and those fingertips turn into a tight grip just above your knees. 

He doesn’t speak up. Instead, he lies on the bed beside you. He holds himself by his elbow, but that hand strokes your scalp while the other traces up and down your thigh, your hips, your breasts, anything he can reach. You avoid the topic at hand to relax into it, and you think you’re finally coming down as that boneless feeling washes over you. 

You’re vaguely aware of his cum dripping out of you, but the sheets are a lost cause anyway. You just watch his lax face, the way the wrinkles in his brow are all smoothed out, the way his eyes follow the patterns he’s drawing on your body. 

He catches you staring. His gaze meets yours and he smiles and it’s sunny. It warms you through, despite all the sweat that’s cooling on your body. 

“Hi,” he whispers. 

You giggle, and he does too. He tries to hold it in by biting his lip, but it’s no use. You will your exhausted bones to shift and face him, and he presses his lips to yours and they meld together.

It’s languid, unhurried, just reacquainting after too long apart. It feels a little goofy, with how you’re both smiling so wide, but it calms you into settling down after such a high. 

Both of your breathing seems even, when you part. 

“That was—”

“It’s never—”

You both chuckle. 

“Ladies first.”

You feel shy now. You can’t imagine why, but a fluttery feeling overtakes your stomach. 

“I was just gonna say… That was better than all those times I imagined it.”

You didn’t think it was possible, but his smile grows even wider. His eyes flicker from yours to the sheets between you, and you think maybe he feels as bashful as you do. 

“It’s never been that good.”

A sigh escapes him when he speaks, and his nervous gaze lands on you when his face falls into something more earnest. 

It takes your breath away. Because it’s never been that good for you either, and isn’t that such a perfect coincidence?

You tug him to you by the back of his neck, eat up the surprised little sound he makes against your mouth. 

“When can we go again?”

#Pedro pascal #Pedro pascal x reader #Pedro pascal smut #Pedro pascal fanfiction #Pedro pascal characters #x reader #marcus pike #marcus pike x reader #marcus pike smut #the mentalist

[padfootagain]

Only An Almost (VI)

Chapter 6: Hiding

Hello!! Here is a new chapter!

I hope you’ll like this chapter! Please, tell me what you think!

*************************************

Pairing: Hozier x fem!reader, friends with benefits AU

Warning: No explicit smut or nsfw content, but there are sexual themes and heavy make-out sessions (it’s a friends with benefits AU, I can’t really escape it), so 18+ only!

Summary: Andrew has been in love with you for years, and yet he has never confessed his feelings. But a night out celebrating the engagement of his best friend changes everything. However, you don't seem ready to be with him just yet. You make him an offer that he can't refuse... but will certainly regret.

Word Count : 2387

Masterlist for the series – Hozier’s Masterlist – Main Masterlist

Andrew needed to talk to you.

After his conversation with Sam, there was no doubt left in his mind that he needed to tell you how he truly felt. This… situation, this… arrangement… it couldn’t go on. It was hurting him too much. Having you for a moment, and then being back to square one, holding himself back all the time, and this fool’s hope that you could feel the same if he waited…

He couldn’t keep on doing this. Another week and two nights with you had passed, and Andrew was now resolute. As he was knocking on your front door and then digging his hands in his pockets, he kept on repeating the words he had prepared beforehand. It was so much easier to write things down, he had sketched his speech this morning.

I know you don’t want a relationship at the moment, I understand that.

He knocked a second time as you weren’t opening the door.

But I’m not sure this… arrangement of ours is a good idea. I see you as more than just a friend. Way more than that. And I don’t think that I can keep on being casual with you.

At long last, the keys turned in the lock, and he stood a little straighter, taking a deep breath.

I get it that this is not the right time for you, and that’s alright. I’ll wait. I’ll wait all the time you need to have a proper date and a proper relationship with you. I’ll wait for you.

You opened the door.

I’ll wait for you, Y/N, if you want to give me a chance…

“Andy? Were we… had we something planned for today?”

“Hi! Erm… not exactly, but like… I haven’t seen you in a few days, I was getting worried you might have been eaten by some roaming spirit or the monster under your bed or something…”

He mentally slapped himself for such a weird and stupid joke.

You granted him an amused smile nonetheless, he was even ready to believe that you were struggling not to laugh.

“I’m alright, I’m just super busy with work.”

“You look tired.”

You looked exhausted, actually, with bags under your eyes, dishevelled hair…

“Thanks, I guess…”

He rolled his eyes.

“It’s not what I meant. You are always stunning. But you do look like you haven’t had a proper rest in a few days.”

“I have so many things to do…”

You heaved a sigh, and it was easy to see that you were buzzing with anxiety.

“Can I come in?” Andrew finally asked, but he was surprised when you hesitated.

“I have some work to do…”

“It’s Sunday afternoon, you’re not supposed to be working on Sunday.”

“Andy…”

“Do I really need to beg?”

He gave you a crooked smile, the ones he thought were almost cocky but behind which he badly hid that he was worried. You heaved a sigh and let him in.

“Tea?” you asked, although you were already grabbing the kettle by the time Andrew had rid himself of his coat.

“Thanks,” he smiled as he sat down by your table.

He waited until you were sitting with him before speaking again. He reckoned that you needed to be eased into the conversation he was aiming for, so he started with niceties.

“What has you so busy then?”

“Work. Important projects.”

“What kind?”

“Look, Andy… I appreciate the thought, but I don’t have time for this…”

“You can’t keep on working without taking a break… it’s Sunday.”

“Like you’re never working on Sundays.”

“I’m a musician, not an office employee. If I want to, I can decide not to work for an entire month, and no one is going to say a thing about it.”

“Touché…”

“Seriously, though… I’m just worried. Why don’t you take a small break with me, huh?”

“Andy, if you came to get laid, I’m not in the mood…”

“I didn’t…”

He frowned as he stared at you, offended by the thought. Your expression softened.

“Sorry. I’m a little on edge.”

“I haven’t heard from you in several days, I was just stopping by to check up on you.”

“I know… I’m sorry, that’s very nice of you, actually. I’m just so…”

“Stressed? Tired? On the verge of a nervous breakdown?”

“All of the above…”

Andrew drank a gulp of tea or two, before standing up in a jolt.

“Come on, go get changed.”

“What?”

“You need some fresh air. Some fresh air, and a nice walk. Come on. Get properly dressed, we’re leaving.”

“Andy…”

“You look like a zombie, you need a break.”

“I thought I was still stunning.”

“You are. Don’t ask me how you do it. Come on!”

You smiled, and seemed to hesitate one last time before getting up as well. You went to your tiptoes to kiss his cheek, and he bent to meet you halfway.

“Thank you, Andy. Where are we going?”

“I’ll find a nice spot, I promise.”

How could Andrew bring up this conversation?

He kept his words light and playful during the short drive to the spot he knew you would like. Some quiet path winding through the Wicklow hills, one that you knew already, but didn’t go there often. It was an easy, peaceful walk. Perfect to focus on nature, and get out of your head. It would do you good.

You were finally starting to relax, and Andrew didn’t dare to bring up the subject he so desperately needed to discuss. Partly because he didn’t want to stress you out again, partly because he was too afraid.

You joked around and spoke of unimportant but lovely things while you walked, his fingers brushing yours every once in a while, blaming the uneven terrain for the ghostly touch. But he didn’t reach out, didn’t hold onto you. He didn’t dare to.

You had brought some snacks with you, prepared while Andrew was pestering you to hurry. He decided that he would talk to you while you took a break to eat them. Yes, that sounded good…

“How often do you come here?” you asked him after a short silence.

“To this spot you mean? I don’t know… Haven’t come in a few weeks, that’s for sure.”

You giggled, and he slowed down to walk next to you again.

“You and your long legs. Wait for us mortals, would you?”

“Only if you’re nice to me.”

“I’ll give you a snack.”

“Hmm… that could work.”

“Or actually, never mind that. Go ahead and play the lure. So the beasts will attack you and spare me.”

“The beasts? What beasts? The squirrels? A bird?”

“There are badgers everywhere around here.”

“True, but I’m too skinny for their taste, I’m sure.”

“A bite-size ankle.”

“Nothing but bone, I’m afraid. Not enough sustenance. They’ll have to get to you, eventually.”

“Naughty.”

You walked further along the quiet path, laughing and joking and talking nonsense. And this was nice, unbelievably nice. There was just something about you that made Andrew’s shoulders lighter, his world brighter.

Love. It’s love.

You took a turn, came to particularly nice spot, breaking free from the trees of the forest trail. There was a clear view of the hills from there, and the valleys below.

“This is so nice. You were right, I was cooked up at home, and then at the office… I needed this. I needed some time outside, to clear my head.”

The Wicklow hills rolled before you, in various shades of green, the bluish grey of a stream running between them. You sat down together on an old stone wall, and you shared your snack with him: some slices of apple and a few biscuits.

“It’s so nice out here. We had not done that in a while, had we?” you went on, before taking a bite at the piece of apple in your hand.

The fruits were sweet and sticky with juice and sugar. The flesh had turned a little brown, oxidized by the air. Andrew hummed in agreement as he took another piece.

“Yeah, a few months, I’d say.”

“Longer than that. I don’t think we’ve done this since you’ve been back.”

“Maybe you’re right.”

He saw your gaze softening with sadness, something close to melancholy.

“How do you do it?”

Andrew frowned in response, silently asking what you meant. You looked at the landscape again as you answered.

“The touring. The constant travelling. Always being away from home. How do you do it?”

Andrew shrugged.

“It’s not as bad as it sounds. I get to do what I love, I can’t complain about it, I reckon. I’m so lucky people across the world love my music, that… total strangers on another continent can find something to relate to in my songs… It’s more than I’ve ever hoped for concerning my career. I’m very grateful for that.”

“You didn’t answer my question.”

He couldn’t refrain a small smile at that. You were always so stubborn, never letting him get away with things. He loved that about you, it was endearing.

He set his gaze on the landscape too, tracked some clouds drifting in the blue sky. The weather was so lovely this afternoon… he wondered when it would turn to rain.

“It’s tough,” he admitted. “On one hand I’m unbearably lucky. I love travelling, I’m going to places I would never have dreamt of visiting. I meet amazing people. I get to perform my songs, and people come to see me. And I would lie if I pretended that I don’t love touring. But it’s… it’s hard to be away for so long. You live out of a suitcase. You don’t have a proper bed, not to mention your own. You never sleep twice in the same place, you’re always busy, always torn in a thousand directions at once… you’re never on your own, there are constantly at least five people in the same room as you. Sleeping in a bus is hell. You’re… exhausted, all the time. Stressed because of all the things to do, stressed about the schedule, the interviews, the nerves before a show… And I miss home. I miss my parents, and my brother. I miss my friends. I miss my house, and my dog, and my bees, and just… this. I miss this place. And I miss you…”

He heaved a sigh, forcing himself to look at you again, feeling your stare upon him.

“But in the end, I love it. There’s nothing as rewarding as hearing someone else singing something I have written. There’s nothing as exhilarating as being on stage, and performing and… It feels like I was born to do that. It just feels so right. It’s the same when I write music. It just feels right.”

Slowly, you nodded, a gentle smile on your lips.

“I understand. But it sounds lonely.”

“I’m literally never on my own, that’s an issue, actually… to me it is, at least.”

“But you’re not with your family. Can you say that you’re with the people who matter most to you?”

“Some of them are.”

“What about most of us?”

He granted you a sad smile.

“Yeah… yeah, I miss all of you.”

You looked away again, and he was surprised to catch a glimpse at tears in your eyes.

“I don’t think I could do it. Not just travelling but… just… how can you be with someone if you’re never here?”

It was his turn to look away to hide rising tears. His throat tightened, his heart dropped, his chest was collapsing…

Was that why you didn’t want to be with him? Why you kept him at arm’s length?

“It can be difficult,” he nodded.

“Is that why you broke up with your ex?”

“There were a bunch of reasons. But it was one of them, yeah.”

“I… I don’t think I could handle it. Waiting for you to come back…”

“I understand.”

“Don’t get me wrong, when I proposed our… arrangement… it wasn’t because it was you. I… I genuinely don’t want to date anyone at the moment. My job is a lot. And I… I’m a little lost these days. What I’m trying to say is that… I feel lonely, sometimes. But I can’t be in a relationship right now. But if I proposed for us to remain friends, it wasn’t because I was rejecting you specifically. Do you see what I mean?”

“I think so… but I… I mean like… my career means that… if you were in a position that allowed you time and space for a relationship, you would still not choose me, right? That’s what it means.”

“I…”

But you grew quiet, and he wasn’t stupid. His vision was blurred with tears: a mix of several shades of green, a splash of blue and some grey and white. A cloud was passing.

He had come all the way here with you to talk, and he had his answer.

“You’re… you’re still okay with what we agreed on, right?”

What could he answer?

No… no, it hurts more than anything I’ve ever experienced. But I can’t lose you for good. I’m not strong enough to survive it…

“Had I been anything else but a touring musician… would you have wanted to date me?” he asked, voice deeper than usual, unbearably fragile.

You didn’t say anything; he took your answer for a no.

He was being a fool…

“I can’t think like that, Andy.”

“Why not?”

“For the same reason you can’t stay for the entire night. That we can’t have pet names. That you can’t kiss me now.”

He blinked his tears away to look at you, frowning, silently encouraging you to keep going.

“I can’t let you break my heart, Andrew.”

His lips parted at your words, he tried to wrap his mind around their meaning, blinked a few times.

It was… It was him. He was the problem. Him, and his job. The same pattern it had always been, all over again, but with you this time around.

You cleared your throat, stood up in a hurry.

“Come on, let’s finish this hike!”

He looked at you as you started to walk away, but didn’t move a muscle.

You could have loved him, and he would still stand no chance at all…

#andrew hozier byrne #hozier #the hoziest #hozier x reader #hozier x you #hozier x fem!reader #hozier x y/n #hozier fanfiction #hozier series #series #fanfic #fanfiction #writing

[acourtofthought]

My husband finally put into words for me something that has been the main problem with this whole Anti Gwynriel because of Gwyn's past narrative.

According to Anti's, it's not ok to ship Gwyn with Az because she's not healed enough and hasn't shown that she's ready for a relationship.

According to Anti's, fanart of Gwynriel in provocative positions are not appropriate because it's disrespectful to Gwyn due to her SA, that she needs to first give verbal consent before we're allowed to imagine what a HEA for Gwynriel might look like.

And at first, it almost feels like a gotcha for them because you question whether you're disrespecting real survivors by saying, "she doesn't need to give consent for us to ship them since it's a book." This statement is true, I don't think readers should be forced to abide by real world morals when it comes to possible paths a characters arc might take, however it makes you pause for a moment to question whether what you're saying is disrespectful to those who have been victims.

But he actually flipped that entire thing on it's head when he said, "if the issue is about consent, then why is only being applied to a SA victim? Shouldn't consent be applied to everyone?"

It was kind of a lightbulb moment for me because those Anti's never vocalize how it's wrong for people to ship Eris & Az, Mor & Emerie, Vassa & Lucien (SA victim), Lucien, Jurian & Vassa, the LoA & Helion (because at this point they are not a consenting pair), Nesta & Eris. There are a bunch of non canon, non consent ships in this series and nobody has an issue with those. Nobody takes up the crusade arguing that it's wrong for people in the fandom to imagine those pairings together or drawing fanart of them in NSFW positions. Most of the time they're celebrated but has Emerie consented to having a sexual relationship with Mor? All she did was call her beautiful and Feyre had done the same in ACOMAF. Why do they never call out fanart of that pairing? Or Neris after Nesta harshly rejected him? Where Eris is currently suffering torture at the hands of Beron and we've got no clue as to his sexual preference. Also, Elain only consented to a fully clothed kiss in the bonus (remember, she grew up with human morals which she still holds fast too, she didn't jump right into bed with Graysen), we have no evidence she wanted more yet there's plenty of NSFW E/riel artwork out there and I'm betting some existed before SF, before she even consented to a kiss.

The only time I've ever heard anyone argue for consent or argue against NSFW art is in relation to Az and Gwyn and the message they're sending is that only female characters who have been SA need to give consent before fans should be shipping them.

That's when the shipping agenda makes itself known because if no other non-canon / non-consenting pairing disturbs them to the point they need to create post after post surrounding how wrong people are for shipping them, then it's clear to see that it's only Gwyn being shipped with Az that they take issue with and when only E/riels make these arguments, it seems highly suspect.

Gwyn's SA is irrelevant in terms of consent because EVERYONE should have consent before engaging in physical acts with others no matter their past. However, Gwyn's SA should not be the weight dragging her character down, the scarlet letter on her chest that means the fandom isn't allowed to give her the same treatment that all other characters receive. Where we're free to imagine and create fanart / fanfiction / headcanons (even the NSFW variety) for any pairing that we desire, regardless of their past or preference, even those who have never expressed romantic interest towards one another, except for Gwyn.

Consent in the actual book will be important but consent having already been given in our imaginations so we can imagine possibilities beyond what is currently written is the right of any reader.

#gwynriel #anti e/riel #gwyneth berdara #pro gwyneth berdara

[penkura]

last forever [1/13]

Summary: Zoro only offered to marry you to keep you out of an arranged marriage with a man much older than you. You agreed with the caveat of ending it via annulment once you received word from your parents regarding the original engagement, despite your growing feelings for your close friend.

Pairing: Zoro x Fem!reader, mentioned Sanami later (like epilogue later so chill)

Warnings: Marriage of Convenience, Fake Marriage, referenced sex (waaaaaay later on), mutual pining, Zoro is bad at feelings but what's new there, eventual romance I promise, mention of past attempted assault (I'll warn in that chapter), creepy older dude later on

Notes: Hello, this is a fanfic I've been working on for a few months now. I'm still not done, but I figured I would go ahead and start posting it here as a cross post with Quotev and AO3. Sometimes I find this, Zoro and the story, hard to write, but I'm trying. This will NOT be a one-to-one rehashing of the arcs but will have more focus on Zoro and Reader's relationship as it progresses. The first two chapters are written in past tense, everything afterward is present tense, sorry about that. I've been having more fun writing present tense instead of past tense. I have the first three chapters completed, I'm still working on chapter four, but hope to have it done for Monday, and I intend to update mostly on Mondays for this one. Zoro and Reader call each other husband and wife at times, it's in italics on purpose. Hope you enjoy this one.

You were so grateful you couldn't stop crying and thanked him numerous times, never once telling him you hoped you'd never have to get an annulment with him. Your feelings for him were still new, he was a year older than you, but he'd protected you well in the time you knew each other. Of course, you could hold your own as a swordswoman yourself, but Zoro always tried to leave the recon to you while he took out your bounty targets.

Never did you think or imagine your wedding day would be like this. In a courthouse in a backwoods town with no real witnesses, to someone you'd only known for about a year and a half now. This wasn't even out of love for him, he'd only agreed to prevent you from being legally forced into marriage with a man several years older than you who had two other wives already.

No, you and Roronoa Zoro weren't in love, but he was trying to help you out so you didn't end up in a bad situation or with bodyguards chasing you down to force you back to your home village. When you had told him the story, he was honestly disgusted hearing how your family was treating you like an object to be sold, instead of as your own person. The whole reason you'd run away from home was to avoid this, but a letter brought to you by your family's personal carrier bird a few weeks ago changed that. As soon as you turned eighteen, if you weren't married or engaged to someone else, you'd be forced into marrying the creep that agreed to this when you were just fifteen. While you broke down in tears out of fear, Zoro told you he'd marry you to keep you from being taken back home. You told him he didn't have to, but he brought up that after your family heard, if they dropped the arranged marriage, you could get an annulment and it would be like this marriage never happened. You'd be free from your family and the creep, still able to travel and live your own life.

So, a week after you turned eighteen, once you reached a small town with a courthouse, you both immediately went there to get this sham of a marriage completed. The clerk looked you both over several times, asking your ages and you lied, claiming you were both twenty-one when she said you'd need parental approval if you were younger than twenty. She didn't ask for proof, instead mumbling something to herself about how it seemed people were getting married younger and younger every year. No more questions about witnesses, parental approval, or identification to prove your ages, the older woman just filled out the paperwork and had you two sign it for processing.

While it was being processed, she sent you to the other side of the room to sit and wait.

"Thank you."

Zoro just shrugged, wishing the old bat would hurry it up so you could find a hotel and get a room so he could go to sleep. "You don't have to keep thanking me."

Nodding, you bit your lip. It was weird to think you'd legally be husband and wife, despite not being in love with each other, but part of you hoped that maybe over time Zoro would come to love you, and you him, so you'd be a few steps ahead of the curve.

The clerk called you both back over a few minutes later, stamping the papers in her hands and pulling a few more. "You're legally married now, congratulations. I've given you an extra copy since you requested it, and here's an annulment form if you've decided you made a mistake. You have six months to fill out and submit it, at any courthouse, otherwise you'll have to get a divorce."

You nodded and thanked the old woman, who told you two to be careful as you both left. You weren't entirely sure why, but if Zoro knew, he kept his mouth shut about it. Once you left, Zoro started looking for a place to stay while you found somewhere you could have dinner. Neither of you planned to stay in this town for more than a night, so you weren't worried about cashing in any bounties that day.

After finding a place to eat, you stayed nearby while you wrote a brief letter to your family and sent it to them, with your marriage certificate, by your family carrier bird. You really just hoped and prayed that they would accept this information and not still demand you return home, whether they wanted to meet Zoro because they believed your letter, or they wanted you to annul the marriage immediately to marry the creep that agreed to it first. Either way, you had no plans to follow their demands or return home.

You and Zoro didn't meet up until it was about dinner time, not a word about your marriage being spoken but your plans to leave the next morning and head to the next town were the main subject. You split off again after dinner, Zoro giving you the second key to your hotel room while he took a walk, in case you wanted to go and shower or go on to bed. You did so, taking a long shower to keep yourself distracted before choosing one of the two beds as yours for the night, laying face down with your face in the pillow. By the time Zoro did return, you were nearly asleep until he woke you when he opened the door.

"Sorry, didn't mean to wake you."

"It's fine…I wasn't sleeping yet."

You weren't sure if it was just you, but things felt awkward with Zoro now. It probably was just you, because he went to bed like nothing was different, telling you that he wanted to leave as soon as possible in the morning. Shells Town was the next destination for the two of you, since a Marine base was there you figured new bounty posters would be available.

You spent the night half awake, unsure of what you were feeling anymore, but you knew one thing.

It was definitely not the kind of wedding day you ever expected to have.

+!+

What do I do, what do I do??

Pacing around the Marine fortress, you didn't know if you should even try to break in and free Zoro or just wait for the month he agreed on with Helmeppo to be up. All of this because he protected a little girl from the brat's dogs and punched him in the face, the spoiled boy using it as an excuse to bring Zoro in like a criminal, and you just weren't sure what you should do. He'd told you not to interfere and when Helmeppo tried to include you in it, you were surprised Zoro threatened him further and said you had no part in the matter.

Stopping, you sighed and crouched, holding your head in your hands and whining. "What do I do…?"

"Hey, you okay??"

The voice above you sounded kind, and you looked up to see a boy with a straw hat and a scarf under his left eye, with another young boy who had pink hair and glasses. Both looked concerned, wondering why you looked like you were fighting a headache outside of the Marine fortress.

"I'm fine…"

"You sure?" The boy in the hat grinned at you, wanting to really make sure you were fine, getting eye level with you while the other boy looked nervously around. "You don't look fine!"

"Luffy!"

You laughed, sighing a bit and standing up, the boy called Luffy following suit. "Yeah, I'm…I'm sure. My friend just…the Marines got him, I'm not sure what to do."

Luffy and the other boy, Koby you learned, both questioned you until you revealed it was Zoro that was your friend, causing Luffy to get excited as he climbed the wall to look into the yard, while Koby was even more nervous than before. He couldn't even believe that you were friends with the notorious pirate hunter Zoro, let alone traveling with him.

"Hey so that's him??"

Koby climbed up with Luffy and nearly fainted, almost falling off the wall when he saw Zoro. You were so focused on the two boys you didn't notice the little girl, Rika, climbing in and over the wall with rice balls in hand. You could hear her offering them to Zoro despite him telling her to scram, before Helmeppo showed up and had her thrown back over the wall, Luffy catching her and surprising you.

"Hey, I'll take her back to her mom's place!"

Luffy nodded and gave Rika to you, letting you run off with her. You got Rika back to her mother's restaurant, making sure she was alright when Luffy and Koby arrived. Luffy told Rika that Zoro actually ate the rice balls Helmeppo ruined, which didn't really surprise you. He had a soft spot for kids, you'd noticed over time, and always tried to help them if he could.

When Helmeppo came back around and started bragging that he was going to have Zoro executed in a few days, Luffy did the same thing and punched him in the face. The three of you ran off, Luffy jumping over the wall to tell Zoro that if he helped him out, he had to join his pirate crew, but Zoro didn't get a chance to fully agree or deny before Luffy ran off to the fortress to find his swords. Koby and you attempted to untie Zoro, but he was arguing against this due to the deal he made with Helmeppo.

"Come on, I only have to last a couple weeks more!"

"He's not gonna let you go! He's gonna have you executed tomorrow!"

"What?!"

Zoro looked at you, wondering if you had heard that or if Koby was lying to him, even though the younger boy had no reason to lie to him.

"I heard every word, that's exactly what he said."

The Marines, including Axe-Hand Morgan, came after the three of you and attempted to fire at you and Koby, but you knew how to use your sword well enough to block them from hitting Koby or you with their bullets.

Luffy returned finally, blocking another set of bullets about to hit the three of you, showing off his rubber powers which actually kind of freaked you out. Zoro, finally having his three swords back, was able to get free and stop the Marines from attacking all of you any further, calling Luffy Captain after agreeing to join his pirate crew. Another shock for you, one that you'd have to deal with later on.

Luffy was the one to beat Morgan, the other Marines all cheering once they realized they were free from the tyrant's reign.

The whole thing made you smile, glad things had worked out, even as Zoro nearly passed out from hunger, making you laugh and shake your head.

"You're so lame sometimes, husband."

+!+

"So why'd you call him husband earlier??"

Face turning red, you looked at Zoro who sat next to you in Luffy's small boat that just barely comfortably held the three of you. Your husband was fast asleep, arms behind his head, but you waved your hand in front of his face to make doubly sure he was asleep, before hearing a light snore come from him.

Scooting across the boat, you sat right next to Luffy who gave you a confused smile.

"Look, Luffy…you can't tell anyone else you recruit."

"Huh?"

You were trying to keep your voice down so Zoro didn't wake, but Luffy acted like he couldn't even hear you.

"Zoro and I are married."

"You're WH–"

You threw your hands over his mouth, looking over to Zoro barely moving, but still fast asleep. You'd quieted Luffy just in time so he didn't wake your swordsman.

"We're married, but it's only because he's helping me with something. We're not in love, we're not a couple. It's…a marriage of convenience okay?"

Luffy nodded, like he understood everything you just told him. He didn't really, but he at least understood you and Zoro weren't in love, just married.

Weird, but he thought he got it.

"Please, don't tell anyone. I'm waiting to hear from my family before we annul the marriage."

That part confused him, but Luffy decided to agree and promised he wouldn't tell anyone, he didn't question you further. He thought you and Zoro were close, he wouldn't have been that surprised if you said you two were in love and together, but if you said you weren't, that this was just a friend helping another friend, he'd believe you.

That, and as soon as his stomach started growling he forgot anything else he wanted to ask.

"Do you have any food, Luffy?"

"Nope!" Luffy grinned and your face paled, looking at Zoro who just snored again and you had a feeling of dread.

"Oh lord what have we done?"

#one piece #roranoa zoro x reader #zoro x reader #fem!reader #reader insert #one piece x reader #last forever

[fandomnerd9602]

Prom-posal

Fem!Peter Parker x Stark!Reader

You and Petra both could not believe it. You had proposed to her, and despite everything she had said yes honestly the thought of it still made Petra smile a little more and more.

She found herself screaming in delight while working a shift at the Moondance diner, she was so giddy at the mere thought of it.

Any normal girl would consider herself lucky for the fact that she was marrying a stark meaning that she would want for nothing in the world. Not Petra, she was excited because she was marrying her best friend.

She couldn’t help but squeal in delight. She grabbed Betty’s hand and jumped around in the kitchen. And then her boss, Enrique, had to interrupt.

“Yo! Parker! What’s with the jumpin’ jacks?!” his voice thundered.

“Enrique! I’m engaged!” Petra shouted back, excited as ever.

“Yeah. Yeah we all saw the scene.” the man just went back to the grill.

Petra was beyond excited for her marriage to you.

Meanwhile you were with Harley Keener, trying to begin planning the party and ceremony.

“I screwed up” you said kind of upset.

“How?” the young inventor asked with a smirk, “you’re marrying Petra Parker.”

“I ruined my proposal to my best friend”

“Second best friend!” Harley interrupted jokingly.

“I mean…I proposed to her before she even had our prom.” An idea popped into your head, “prom! I need to make my prom-posal to her even more special!”

“Well don’t over think it. And don’t under think it either” your pal offers. “Who can help us?”

Only one name came to mind: Ned Leeds

Would it qualify as kidnapping as to how you got Ned to help you? Put it simply, you saw him walking down the street after school, grabbed him by the backpack and flew back to the Avengers Tower.

“Mr. (Y/N) Stark, sir” Ned said after landing, “that was bot the most terrifying and awesome experience of my life”

“Ned I need your help” you tried to explain only for Harley to come flying in with Michelle in his arms.

“Dude that was weird” Michelle grumbled.

“I need both of you to help me” you tried to explain, “Petra deserves a prom-posal as awesome as her and I’m clueless”

“Whipped” Michelle said jokingly.

“Petra loves Star Wars! And so do i” Ned said with a little nervousness.

“Okay but why?” Michelle asked

“Because I love her and I screwed up the actual marriage proposal” you answered back

“Why?”

“Because she’s the best thing ever in my life and I-I couldn’t think straight when I saw her smile”

“Why” Michelle giggled

“Are you gonna help me or not?!”

“Yeah sure” she said nonchalantly.

That night Petra swung to her apartment and snuck in thru the window, trying to be as quiet as a mouse…or even a spider.

Then aunt May’s voice broke the silence, “Petra, honey, can you come into the living room?”

Busted. Petra thought to herself. She switched into her favorite pair of sweats and hoodie and walked into her living room.

The stereo was playing ‘Always and Forever’ softly. The whole living room was decorated like the Ewok village from Return of the Jedi.

You stood there with a bouquet of flowers and a small smile on your face. “Hey there Spider Monkey” you said softly.

“Hey you” she answered back.

“Petra, I love you so much” you said, “I know I screwed up my proposal and all but-”

“You didn’t.” She answered back with a giggle. “I thought it was just right. I wanna spend my life with you, (Y/N)”

“I wanna spend my life with you too.” You held up the flowers, “and I want to spend prom with you as well. Will you go to prom with me?”

Petra stood there, tears forming in her eyes. She ran forward and jumped into your arms. “Yes. yes! Yes to everything!” she giggled before kissing you. Somehow each kiss with you felt like the first.

Ned, Harley and Michelle each appeared with their own lightsabers and threw confetti.

“Finally.” Michelle said with a little smile.

“Look at my best friend” Ned said with his own smile. “Do you think Y/N will let me be best man?”

“I called dibs dude!” Harley immediately shouted back.

“How about dude of honor?”

“I’ll allow it.”

Not that you or Petra had noticed the argument. The two of you were so busy, lost in each other, lost in this small, infinite moment of happiness.

Tags: @ma1egamer @jacenradio7 @deafeningsharkslimeempath @holiday-house-of-m @family-house-of-m @supercorpdanbeau @pinklawyerwinnerzonk @russianredassassin @revanshand @iamnicodemus @multi-fandom-enjoyer

#marvel #marvel imagine #marvel fluff #mcu #mcu imagine #mcu fandom #hailee steinfeld #female peter parker #peter parker #peter parker x reader #Petra Parker #spider woman #spider girl #spider woman x reader #spider man #spider man x reader #rule 63 #gender swap #genderswap #genderbend #genderbent

[lydiimae]

Strains and Stresses

Pairing: Anthony Bridgerton x !fem reader

Warnings: Light hints at sex, mentions of drinking, the ton being cruel to the reader, Anthony fighting with the reader, old concepts about class and womanhood, a very icky insult thrown at the reader by Anthony, fluffy fluff at the end

Word Count: 2.8k

A.N: Hello my sweet loves <3 I am so sorry I have not updated in a while, I just finished finals so life has been hectic. Also- I got a job FINALLY T-T and, more importantly, the class that I was going to take during the summer fell through so I will have much more time to write! BTW THANK YOU FOR 100 FOLOWERS HOLY \^-^/. You are all so kind to me. Anyway, this is a fic based on a request that you can find here and here. I decided to mix the two, as it is a semi-angsty Ant fic that ends in fluff. I hope you enjoy my darling Anons. For those who have requested a fic, I promise they are coming! I am planning on knocking another one or two out next week, but I wanted to write a Ben fic before as he is a big comfort character for me and I need some of that energy lol. P.S. I listened to the slowed version of Futile Devices while I wrote this, because it is just what I imagine falling in love and loving would feel like. Enjoy <3

You adored working for Lady Danbury, who wouldn't? She is an incredible woman, and so very strong. You admired her, for being so independent. You thought that that would be the life you lead, alone and working out your days as a maid. Then, you met him.

Met would be the wrong word, it was more of... stumbling into him after a young debutante 'accidentally' ran into you. You knew who Anthony Bridgerton was, of course. His reputation preceded him. Many of your friends and fellow maids had spoken of how harsh, how blunt, how much of a rake, the Viscount was.

For you, however, he had never been brash nor cruel, nor had he ever lived up to his reputation. For you, he was kind, gentle, and even sweet. He had placed a steadying hand on your back and met your eyes and you knew it was over.

From then on at every ball Lady Danbury held, you would always follow him to the gardens, stealing kisses in her in-home library, and sharing stolen glances from across the ballroom. After the balls, he would take you to his townhouse and you would both spend hours speaking of your lives, your dreams, your troubles. He was nothing but a gentleman.

You tried your best to ignore the strange warmth that bloomed in your chest when you were with him. In a way, you always knew that you would end up with him. You believed that your lives were intertwined, like a string wrapped around your soul that only stopped tugging when you were near him. It was comforting.

He had expressed his love to you about seven months in, on a Sunday morning in bed. The yellow hue of the morning sunrise made it feel like you were in heaven, his hands running against your sides like you were made from the finest porcelain. He said it easily as if it was the most simple thing he had ever had to do. A simple "I love you." was murmured into your ear before his lips pressed against your forehead. Just as easily came the proposal, more of a promise, right there in the same bed.

It was simple, perhaps even plain, but not to you. To you, it showed he was comfortable enough to express his feelings, and his deepest wants, just to you. It was intimate, the light cascading down upon his skin as if he were a god, bringing out every contour and mark on his body.

After the announcement of your engagement, rumors spread like wildfire. Every house in Mayfair was a spark that made the fire grow, little trails of flame splitting off along the way until the fire was all-consuming. He had warned you that the rumors would be bad, that not many would express their support for the union of a maid and a Viscount. You just did not expect it to be so suffocating.

You found solace in his embrace, as you always did, spending countless nights wrapped in the silk sheets at his townhouse, listening to his whispers of affection and praise until they eased the tears that had spilled down your cheeks.

It went on like this for the three long months leading up to the wedding. You were married in the spring, surrounded by his loved ones as yours had passed long ago. It was small enough to feel the heavy weight of the ton lifted off of your shoulders, if only for a moment.

You honeymooned in Bath, spending time in the hillsides on worn blankets for hours, allowing your skin to be tanned by the sun. When you would go back to the villa you were staying at, you would spend the night wrapped in his bare embrace, relishing in the feeling of his skin upon yours. It was the most calming, loving, and divine three months of your life.

It has been almost eight months since the honeymoon ended. Six months of putting up with the cruel words spoken by members of the ton, of sticking to his side at balls just so you could try and shake the feeling of the many glares sent your way. Six months of learning not only what it is to be a Viscountess, but what it is like to be a noblewoman.

Anthony had spent a month teaching you the proper etiquette that came with being a noblewoman, a lot of it being common sense thanks to Lady Danbury's way of ruling around her home. However, there were some things you found to be too niche to remember. One thing was that a lady could not go out on a walk by herself.

As a maid, walks alone in the gardens of Lady Danbury's estate had become a part of your daily routine. You would often spend countless hours sitting beneath a willow tree flipping pages of a new book or you would walk around the grounds, seeking solace in the fresh air to clear your mind after a particularly hard day. You never snuck out alone, except to see Anthony, and even then you did nothing untoward, which is why it was so hard for you to remember this silly rule. It was one you forgot today, too.

"Thank you, Rose." You hum to your lady's maid as she finishes your hair. She smiles and curtsies in return. "Of course, my lady. You need only ask if you need anything else." She says before she walks out of the room. You sigh, the title the servants address you with will never not feel strange. You adjust your jewels before standing up and walking to the window.

You had been told as you woke that your husband would be in his study today, claiming he must work on the financial affairs, meaning you have the day to yourself. The view from the master bedroom was a gorgeous one, the windows overlooking the entirety of the lands that Aubery Hall encompassed. You smile to yourself, deciding to take a stroll, perhaps even find a spot to enjoy your new book of sonnets Anthony's brother gifted you.

You pluck the book in question off of your bedside table before walking down the grand staircase. The house, other than the footsteps of the servants, is quiet. No one around to stop you from enjoying some time outside, alone. You grab your parasol and open the door, stepping out into the summer air before making your way around the lands of the estate.

Anthony leans back in his desk chair, stretching out his limbs after finishing the last piece of paperwork he has on his desk. He takes a large swig of bourbon before standing up and moving to the window, pulling the curtains open.

He glances out over the sprawling hills of the estates, swirling the copper liquid in his glass as he takes in the view. As his eyes roam, he spots a small figure making their way up one of the hills. At first, he thinks it a servant, probably out to collect fresh flowers for his bedroom upon his wife's request, but when he glances again he sees your parasol. The one he brought back from one of his ventures to France.

He can feel himself getting angry. He had drilled this into your head one too many times, never be anywhere alone, not in public and not on private lands. The servants whisper, and their gossip spreads even faster than the gossip of the bloodthirsty Mamas of the ton. He downs the rest of his bourbon before slamming the glass on his desk. He rounds it and grabs his velvet jacket from its place on the back of his chair, slinging it around his shoulders before stomping out of the room.

You are just about to sit down when you hear the calling of your name from towards the estate. You look over your shoulder, leaning on your closed parasol, to find your husband hurriedly making his way over to where you stand.

At first, you think that something bad might've happened, perhaps he found something in the many documents that was awry, but you know that is not the case from the way he is walking. Stomping, rather. He is angry, furious even, so you try and wrack your mind to find what you have done to make him this angry.

Before you can he is upon you, one of his large hands encircling your wrists and dragging you away from the hill. "Anthony, do not grab me like some sort of brute!" You yelp, trying to tug away from his bruising grip, which he only tightens upon your plea. "I shall grab you however I wish." He snarls, making your eyes widen. "Be quiet until we are inside."

He tugs you along until you are both inside of his study, where he slams the door and locks it. You begin to speak but he quickly interrupts. "Have you any idea of what you could have just done by being out there, Y/N?!" He shouts, making you take several steps back in surprise. "I was only going for a walk." You whisper and he scoffs. "A walk alone, you foolish woman!" He continues, his voice only getting louder.

The insult sends anger through your veins. "You shall not insult your own wife for merely going outside!" You shout back and he narrows his eyes almost dangerously. "I have told you hundreds of times that you are not permitted outside without a proper companion, Y/N! Going against that is indeed foolish as I have hammered it into your head countless times!" He shouts. "I am not foolish! This is all new for me! I-" You start but he is quick to respond.

"New? That is rich! Utterly rich, because to me it has been eleven months! Eight of which you have been here, doing your duties as my Viscountess!" He shouts louder, on the verge of screaming. You press yourself against the wall opposite to him. "Did they not teach you anything in your time as a maid?! You still act like a common whore even though we have fought about this too many times to count! I am tired of it!" He shouts.

Common whore. The title cuts straight through you like a hot knife, the burns making your eyes well up with tears. The title has been used to spite you at every ball, in every gossip letter, and in every whisper you have heard in the last year. It does not hurt coming from them any longer, but from him? From your husband? It feels like he has damaged your very being.

You stand there stunned, watching his mouth move but hearing no words. "You think I am a common whore?" You whisper and he stops, looking at you. You are pressed against the wall, your arms hugging your frame, tears spilling freely down your cheeks. His body language visibly changes from that of an angered husband to a guilty one.

"Y/N I did not mean-" He begins but you shake your head. "You most certainly did mean it, it came out of your mouth!" You sob. "I was angry! I am angry!" He shouts, more in a desperate act now, wishing he could reverse time. "So?!" You shout, your gloved hands pressing into your bare arms. "I have never once insulted you like that! Never once used what has been said about you as a weapon for merely-" You laugh bitterly, shaking your head and looking away. "For merely going outside." You scoff.

He falters and visibly slumps in defeat. "It is foolish, but they will talk, Y/N. You know-" He begins quietly, but again you do not let him finish. "Yes, Anthony. They will talk, they will say the words you have just spoken to me." You say, wiping your eyes. "I forgot, and I know you have drilled every rule into my head but this is not the norm for me." You whisper

"When I was a maid, no, even when I was a little girl, I would go wherever I wished alone. I would pick up food at the market for my family, and take my brother to his job at the factory, and now I cannot even go outside alone? Upon my husband's private lands, no less?" You whisper. "So forgive me, Anthony, for forgetting rules that you and your siblings have grown up abiding by. I am trying to learn and remember them now, after living a very different life." You say, looking at your feet in an attempt to stop the tears. As if not looking at him will somehow ease the sting of his words.

He scoops you into his arms without thinking about it, pressing his forehead to yours. "Y/N, you know I did not mean it." He whispers and you frown, trying to tug away. "No, no. I might've meant it in the moment, and I know I cannot take it back." He amends, his hold on you tightening. Still, you refuse to meet his eyes. "Darling, please look at me. I swear I shall never say anything as cruel as what I did ever again." He whispers, his fingers curling around your chin so he can bring your gaze back to him.

When your eyes meet his he offers a sad smile, tucking a strand of loose hair behind your ear. "It was cruel. No, no. Cruel is too kind of a word, it was vile, for me to utter such a word when speaking of my own wife." He whispers, his hand coming down to your cheek. "I swear to you that I mean it when I say I am sorry, you shall never know how sorry I am for saying something so disgusting to you."

He continues, his thumbs swiping away the tears that have now begun to flow again. "You are the most important thing to me. I have done a terrible job of showing you that today. I shall spend every day trying to ease the pain of my foolish words." He vows, pressing a kiss to your forehead. "I know this is hard for you, the rules of society are so... foolishly strict for women and even I cannot imagine how much stress they are adding upon everything else" He murmurs, and you tug at his sleeve, willing him into an embrace.

You tuck your face into the crook of his neck and allow yourself to cry. "Shhh, Y/N. You are perfect, no matter your status." He whispers in your ear, running one of his hands up and down your back as the other rests on your hip. "I am not a good Viscountess, Anthony." You whisper and his grip on you tightens. "Hush. You are the perfect Viscountess, Y/N. The perfect Bridgerton." He promises.

"You have been learning so quick, one slip-up of an utterly foolish rule does not discount the many months where you have been perfect." He whispers, pressing his lips to the side of your head. "Neither do the words of your brutish husband." He teases quietly and your lips turn up a bit. "The gossiping Mamas will find another topic in time, my love. They are merely jealous that their daughters are still stuck without a husband while you are here." He murmurs and you nod.

He pulls back and cups your cheeks, watching your eyes flutter shut. "Better?" He whispers, running his thumbs along your cheekbones. You nod and he sighs in relief, bringing you closer to his chest. "I will never be able to express how sorry I am for saying that to you." He whispers. You smile, leaning into his touch and nodding.

He presses a gentle kiss to your lips and wipes the remainder of your tears away before pulling back a bit. "We shall have a picnic." He whispers and you open your eyes, laughing. "We do not have to" You giggle and he grins, shaking his head. "Nonsense, we must. I have been cooped up inside all day and I wish to spend time with you, in the sunshine." He hums, pressing his lips to your nose.

An hour later you are both lying down on a lacy blanket, a picnic basket full of sweet treats. Two glasses of wine stand abandoned on the grass, being forgotten in a mess of kisses. Your head is resting on his chest, your hands clasped together over one of his legs. "I love you." He whispers, pressing a kiss to your brow. Your eyes are shut but you smile. "And I love you." You whisper back, falling asleep while bathed in sunlight.

How divine it feels to be loved by Anthony Bridgerton.

#bridgerton fic #anthony bridgerton x reader #anthony bridgerton fluff #anthony bridgerton fanfiction #bridgerton #bridgerton imagine #bridgerton fluff #bridgerton fanfiction #anthony bridgerton x you #anthony bridgerton fanfic #anthony bridgerton imagine #anthony bridgerton #anthony bridgerton x female reader #fluff #cutie pie anthony #bridgerton angst #light angst #angst #angst with a happy ending #angst with fluff #anthony bridgerton angst #meanie anthony #imagine #angst imagine #fluff imagine

[maximoffcarter]

Now that you're here.

Pairings: Alex Cabot x reader.

Summary: Anxiety and insomnia were two of the things that kept Alex Cabot awake at night. Sometimes pills had to be her comfort to be able to sleep through the night; that was until she met reader.

A/n: This was requested by an anon, Alex having a hard time sleeping until she meets reader. I gotta admit that I love writing Calex but also reader inserts are comfort for me haha. Don't be afraid to send me an ask or message if you got any requests, I'm up for anything for now. Enjoy and leave your comments, reblog, hearts, whatever you'd like, will be very much appreciated🫶🏻

*not my gif*

“Alex, you look like crap.” Olivia said as Alex walked into the precinct, a bit of concern behind her words.

Alex looked at her with a raised brow. “You sure know how to compliment a woman.”

“Sorry.”

Alex sighed as she shook her head. “Sorry, didn’t actually get a good night sleep. What do you have for me?”

It was known that Alexandra Cabot was devoted to her job. She could stay hours in her office without a problem, as unhealthy as it was. She basically only got home to ‘sleep’, take a shower, and have some sort of food, whatever she could find really. She barely knew what free days were, not wanting to skip any work day in case they really needed her. But she was also conscious of how this affected her physically and emotionally, it could be draining, but there was nothing a couple of pills couldn’t do for her -also very unhealthy-. Today, she had been called to the precinct for some advice, frustrated as she figured they had nothing she could work with and she just wasted time in walking all the way here, almost running out of the building as she had some arraignments she had to get to. The day had felt so long and draining, she felt exhausted to the point where she could literally drop asleep in any place, but knew that once she was home, there was no way she was going to sleep.

So after leaving her office, she opted for stopping by a small bar that was near her apartment. The thought of a good scotch drink made her feel a bit more relaxed. It was a Tuesday, so of course the bar would be almost empty, which also was to her favor as she really didn’t feel like dealing with drunk people. As she sat down, she noticed a girl who sat just two seats away from her. Alex could definitely move to another seat, but she just wanted the drink so badly that she didn’t really care. As she ordered the drink, she couldn’t help but study the mentioned girl; she was wearing scrubs which meant she was either a nurse or she worked in the health area, her head was in a ponytail, some hair all over the place, but still cute. The girl was entranced in her drink, just staring at it.

“Hard day?” Alex said before she could even figure out that the words were coming out of her mouth. She was supposed to enjoy a drink or two and then leave, but now there was the possibility that she just engaged herself into conversation.

The girl looked up and her eyes fell on Alex, offering a tired smile. “You could say so.” She raised her brow as she noticed the drink. “Guess it was for you too?”

Alex scoffed, nodding, and taking a sip of her drink. “You could say so.” She grinned as she turned to look at the girl again.

The girl huffed a chuckle, turning her body to face Alex. “Judging by your drink and clothes…I dare to say you’re a lawyer?” She raised her brow.

Alex grinned as she nodded. “Is it that obvious?”

The girl shrugged. “Just a bit.”

Alex raised her brow. “And judging by your drink and clothes, I dare to say you’re a nurse?”

“Is it that obvious?.” She smiled softly and extended her hand. “Y/n.”

Alex chuckled as she took her hand. “Alex.”

They held each other’s hand for a little longer than expected, just staring into each other’s eyes. Y/n couldn’t help but get lost in those baby blue eyes, Alex was beautiful, she was sure she was the most beautiful girl she has ever seen in her life, and she sees a lot of people every single day. As for Alex, she felt attached to her, something called her in and she couldn’t help but study every single feature of y/n, even with the tiredness in her face, she looked beautiful. They finally let go of their hands and giggled quietly, their eyes going back to their drinks.

“Done with your shift or you’re heading there?” Alex decided to speak again, looking back at y/n.

Y/n sighed in relief. “Done with my shift. Almost 20 hrs cause I needed some extra hours. And drinking is not allowed before a shift.” She grinned as she looked back at Alex. “What about you? Done with…court?”

Alex chuckled as she nodded. “Yes. We don’t really do court that late, though. Just paperwork and preps.” She smiled.

“Private lawyer or…?”

“Assistant District Attorney. I work for Special Victims.”

Y/n tilted her head as she smiled. “So you know Liv.”

Alex raised her brows at the name and nodded. “I do. You know her too?”

“They call me in whenever they have a victim. I mostly work ER, so.” Y/n smiled. “So now I know the famous attorney they always mention.”

Alex shrugged and grinned. “Nice to meet you.” She chuckled.

What was supposed to go for half an hour or an hour, turned to three hours. Alex had said a drink or two would be enough, but now she was involved in conversation with y/n, which she did not mind at all because she was enjoying this more than she expected. She wasn’t one to give up information about what she did or anything about her life, but as y/n started talking about her life, she felt safe to talk about hers too. It wasn’t all work, it was also things they did out of work, which in Alex’s part, she really didn’t have much to talk about since her whole life was work but listening to y/n talk was enough for her.

After the last call, both women decided to take a walk in direction to their apartments. Alex knew she had to grab a taxi at some point, but she didn’t want the night to end even if she had an early morning. Y/n kept going on about some work thing, and Alex just stared at her the whole time. They finally got to a corner and in front of a building, Alex sure this is where y/n lived, and they stood there, smiling at each other.

“Here is my stop.” Y/n turned to look at Alex. “Thanks for keeping me company.” She smiled softly.

Alex smiled. “I should say the same. Sorry I kept you until late.”

“It was worth it.” Y/n blushed as her words left her mouth, she cleared her throat and then looked in her backpack, getting a small notebook and a pen. “You can throw it away or do what you please with it but…here’s my number.” She then gave her a small paper and smiled. “If I don’t answer, it’s not because I’m avoiding or ignoring you. I’m working.”

Alex giggled as she grabbed the paper and stared at it for a moment before she looked up. “Noted.”

“I’ll see you around, Alex. Be safe.” Y/n smiled.

Alex saw y/n get into the building and turning to say a final goodbye to Alex before she disappeared. Alex stood there for a bit more, playing the evening in her mind and smiling. After all the stress and tiredness, the least she had expected was to meet someone at a bar and staying with her for hours just talking and laughing. Definitely worth the tiredness for the morning.

********************

Alex groaned as she took off her glasses, putting them on her desk and then groaning as she rubbed her eyes. Not only was she tired, but she was frustrated. The trial hadn’t gone as she expected, there was still a chance to win but at this point, her options were limited and the only thing she could do was push through it and try her best. She was also frustrated because she had to cancel on y/n last minute, her desk flooded with paperwork that she needed to finish, so she had to call y/n to cancel.

After that night at the bar, Alex couldn’t help and she called y/n the next day, while she was at her office doing paperwork she had called y/n and they had a conversation for a whole hour, and before saying goodbye, Alex had asked her out. The date went smoothly, and it had been better than they expected. For a whole month, they tried to go out every week, but today that was not possible. She had enjoyed every minute she spent with y/n, her day being a lot better just by seeing her, even if she had not much to say, she could listen to y/n over and over again. She looked at her watched and sighed, it was pass 10:30 pm and she was nowhere near finishing. She looked down at her paperwork and was about to dive in again, but a knock on her door startled her, making her look up at her door.

“Y/n?”

Y/n smiled softly as she leaned over the door frame. “Hello, counselor.”

“What are you doing here?” Alex smiled, moving her hand to let y/n know it was okay to come in.

“Well, since a pretty girl canceled our date today, I thought maybe I could show up in her office with some takeout. Cause I’m pretty sure she has not had any food all day.” Y/n walked to the desk, raising her brow as she looked at Alex. “I took the liberty of ordering Chinese, hope you don’t mind.” She showed the bags she had in her hands and smiled.

Alex felt her heart beating a bit faster as she listened to y/n, smiling softly. “Any food sounds amazing. Thank you.” She stood up and moved to the small table beside her desk, followed by y/n. They both sat down, and Alex then looked at her confused. “I have a suspicion on how you got into the building, but how did you know where my office was?”

“I’m not gonna confirm or deny that I had to stop by every floor to find it.” Y/n grinned as she got the food out.

Alex furrowed her brows. “You didn’t.”

“Baby, I asked the guard.” Y/n chuckled softly.

Alex blushed softly at the pet name, grabbing the boxes that y/n handed her. “Right. Sorry, my mind is kind of screwed at this point.” She looked at y/n and smiled. “I’m glad you came here.”

Y/n smiled. “My pleasure. I wanted to see you, and if this is my chance to see you, then I’ll take it.”

Alex tried to hide the big smile she had on her face and looked down at the box of food she had in her hands, grabbing some sticks and started eating. They ate in silence for a moment until they started talking about their days, Alex complaining about the trial and then the whole paperwork, and y/n talking about her day at the hospital. There was a moment where Alex went back to paperwork just to finish up and y/n stayed there reading a book and finishing her food. Every now and then, they look at each other without them noticing, time to time they’d lock eyes and just smile, trying to hide their smiles. Alex felt like a teenager, both doing their homework or studying and just keeping each other company, looking at each other and then going back to it. But even then, she felt happy.

Pass midnight, Alex finally said she was done, grabbing what she needed to take home and cleaning up their empty boxes of food. Unconsciously, as they left the office and waited for the elevator, Alex grabbed y/n’s hand and intertwined their fingers, only noticing once they were inside the elevator. She turned to look at y/n, who was already looking at her with a smile on her face. Once they walked out of the building, they kept walking hand in hand, talking about everything and nothing at some point. After walking a few blocks, they were waiting for the green light to cross the street and that’s when Alex turned to look at y/n.

“Would you like to come over? To…my apartment?” Alex bit her lip as she looked at y/n.

Y/n smiled softly. “I’d like that.” She whispered softly.

Alex smiled, noticing the light was green and they crossed the street. At some point, Alex decided it’d be quicker if they called a cab, so they did. Alex never let go of y/n’s hand, sitting close to each other in the cab and just looking out the window, the silence was comfortable, something both women were growing into. Once in Alex’s building, they went into the elevator and waited for the doors to close. Alex just stared at the doors for a moment, until she felt y/n’s hand on her cheek and the next thing she knew, her face was getting turned in y/n’s direction and she felt a pair of soft lips on hers. Alex gasped quietly, but right after, her free hand went to y/n’s waist, pulling her closer as she kissed her back. The kiss was slow and sweet, with a hint of passion in it, nothing either of them had experienced before. They had shared cheeks kisses while saying goodbye, but Alex was too shy to kiss her properly, so to say she was thankful that y/n kissed her, it was an understatement. y/n broke the kiss and Alex tried to follow her to keep kissing her, opening her eyes as she heard y/n giggling.

“What are you laughing at? You kissed me.” Alex grinned.

“I did. But you’re cute.” Y/n smiled as she pecked her lips. “I’m sorry if I didn’t ask, I just been thinking about kissing you for so long.”

Alex smiled. “I have too, but I was shy.”

“You’re welcome.” Y/n chuckled and just as she was leaning in again, the doors of the elevator opened.

Alex pulled her quickly out of the elevator and walked to the end of the hallway until they were at Alex’s door. As soon as they were in, Alex turned to look at y/n but before she could do anything, y/n had the same thought as Alex and she placed her hands on Alex’s waist, pushing her against the door, her lips attaching to Alex’s in a heated kiss. At some point they kicked the bags off onto the floor, not really minding where they landed. Alex moaned softly as her hands went to y/n’s hair, her hips thrusting into y/n’s as she tried to get her impossibly closer to her. y/n pulled away for some air, but soon enough started kissing Alex’s chin and went down to her neck, biting and licking every inch of skin she found. Alex threw her head back, giving her a bit more access to kiss her.

“W-We should move to my bed.” Alex moaned out as she looked down at y/n.

Y/n looked up at Alex and grinned. “Okay.” She pulled away from Alex and took off her coat, Alex doing the same thing and grabbing both of them to put them on the rack beside her door.

Alex took y/n’s hand and pulled her to her room, as soon as the door was open, she turned to kiss y/n again, her heartbeat racing as y/n’s hand found the buttons of her shirt and she started undoing them. Alex pulled away for air, looking at y/n as she panted. Her hand stroked her cheek for a moment, her fingers then moved to y/n’s chin to make her look up.

“Are you sure you want to do this?” Alex asked softly.

Y/n smiled softly, her heart pounding on her chest at the questions. “I’m sure. Are you?”

Alex smiled as she nodded. “I do.” She lost no time and went back to kiss her, her hands landing on y/n’s shirt.

********************

Alex woke up to the sun hitting her face, she forgot to move the curtains when she got home so now the sun was in a part of her room. She stretched a little and groaned as she moved, only to feel that she had no clothes on her and the only thing covering her was her blanket. She took a moment to register what happened the night before, and it clicked when she turned to look at a sleepy and naked y/n beside her. She smiled softly as she remembered the night before. Not wanting to get up yet, she laid on her stomach and faced y/n, her smile never fading away as she studied every single feature in her face.

Then her mind started wandering and she almost gasped at the realization that she had slept the whole night. It could’ve meant nothing, but she had been having a lot of trouble sleeping because of the cases they’ve had, her anxiety being present every single night making her have insomnia. But tonight she had slept, and she felt relaxed and rested, she could get used to this. She closed her eyes for a bit, not feeling like moving or doing anything at all. But then she felt the bed moving, she could hear y/n groaning softly and she couldn’t help but grin. She kept her eyes closed, the grin never leaving her face which gave her up, y/n knowing she was awake.

Y/n moved close to Alex and kissed her naked shoulder softly. “Morning.” She whispered.

“Morning.” Alex finally opened her eyes and looked at y/n, smiling.

“How long have you been awake?” Y/n laid her head back down on the pillow as her hand made patterns on Alex’s back.

“Not too long. I just didn’t feel like moving. Though I know my phone will go off anytime soon.” Alex chuckled.

Y/n smiled. “And I need to get home to change. My shift starts at 2 pm.”

“Why don’t you shower here?”

Y/n grinned as she raised her brow. “With you?”

Alex realized the insinuation of her question, she didn’t mean it like that, but she wouldn’t be opposed to it. “I don’t see why not.” She moved to sit up and stretch, looking back at y/n. Y/n stared at her and smiled, making Alex chuckle. “What?”

“You’re beautiful.” Y/n whispered softly as she smiled. “I don’t mean to come off as a creep, but even if you always look beautiful, right here…right now…you look the most beautiful.”

Alex bit her lip as she tried to hide her smile, she leaned down and kissed her lips softly. “You’re just as beautiful.” She smiled softly. “Now, let’s go to shower before my phone goes off.” She whispered against her lips before she pecked them.

********************

Alex sighed as she laid on her bed, looking up at the ceiling. She had been trying to sleep for the last 2 hrs but sleep was definitely not on her side. She had tried everything at this point, even had taken some pills for her anxiety but sleep was definitely not an option. She couldn’t quite understand why she was not able to sleep when in the last few days she had been sleeping just fine, but today they beat her up at trial and she had been a bit stressed about it. Also she had not been able to get lunch with y/n so that had added to her anxiety since she was now used to their little routine. She took her phone and stared at it for a moment, until she dialed the number and waiting, hoping she wouldn’t grab her in a bad moment.

“Hello?”

“Hi.” Alex smiled as she heard y/n.

“Lex! Hi! I’m so glad to hear your voice.”

Alex chuckled softly. “So glad to hear your voice too.” She smiled. “Are you busy?”

“No, I actually just finished with a patient, and I came to the on call room to lay down for a bit.” She sighed softly. “How are you? Shouldn’t you be sleeping?”

Alex bit her lip softly. “I can’t.”

“Is something bothering you, love?”

Alex smiled softly at the pet name, they randomly came but she loved when they did. “They beat my ass today. I worked with Liv and Elliot all day to try and find something that could help us.”

“I’m sure you’ll find something.”

“I know, just…” Alex sighed. “I cannot let this man walk free.“

“And you won’t. You got this.”

Alex smiled softly. “I wish you were here.” She whispered softly, almost to herself, but she knew y/n had heard her.

“Just a few more hours till my shift ends and I can go visit you at your office.”

“You don’t have to do that. I know you’re exhausted as it is.”

“I told you before…I’d do anything to get to see you for at least a minute. I can sleep later.”

Alex shook her head as she smiled. “You’re too cute.”

“And cheesy, but you seem to not mind it.” Y/n chuckled.

“Not one bit.” Alex smiled as she sighed. “I’ll let you get some sleep and I’ll try to sleep too.”

Y/n stayed silent for a moment. “Alex?”

“Yes?”

Another moment of silence and then Alex could hear a small sigh. “I’ll see you later.”

Alex furrowed her brows but nodded as if y/n could actually see you. “I will.”

Alex hung up the call and sighed softly as her eyes went back to looking up at the ceiling. Part of Alex’s work was to figure out people whether they were lying or not, she could either notice it in their body language or the way they talked, and their voices slightly changed. She had now been dating y/n for the last 4 months, they’ve made it official after the second night y/n had stayed over with her and she couldn’t be happier about it, but in the last week she could see that y/n was battling with herself about something, but Alex was not one to pressure her into talking -even if that was mostly what she did with her job-. At some point Alex closed her eyes and fell asleep, her mind clouded in thought of y/n.

********************

Y/n knocked on Alex’s door and smiled softly as Alex looked up and offered a smile. “Hello, Ms. Cabot.”

“Hello there.” Alex smiled softly as y/n closed the door behind her.

“I brought you some coffee and a sandwich. You can leave it for later.” Y/n said as she walked to Alex, putting her coffee in front of her and the box of the sandwich on the small table beside her desk.

Alex sighed, a smile on her face. “You didn’t have to.” She stood up and wrapped her arms around y/n’s neck.

Y/n smiled softly as she wrapped her arms around Alex’s waist. “I wanted to. You should be used to it by now.”

“You’re just too good to me.” Alex whispered softly as she closed the gap between them, giving her a sweet kiss.

“How are you doing today?”

Alex sighed. “Apparently Liv and Elliot are getting somewhere, Fin and Munch are trying to check on some records. Maybe we’ll get something out of it.”

Y/n leaned up to kiss her nose and smiled. “You got this, Lex. And I’ll be here for you.”

Alex smiled as she nodded, kissing her forehead softly. “Thank you.” She then chuckled. “What’s your height again?” She looked at y/n teasingly.

Y/n rolled her eyes. “You know, you might be a bit taller than me, but the heels are helping you. I’m not even short, you’re just too tall.”

Alex laughed softly as she nodded. “Okay.” She ran her fingers through y/n’s hair as her eyes stayed glued on hers. “Was there something you wanted to tell me earlier?”

Y/n’s breath hitched as she looked at Alex, thinking she might’ve forgotten. “I uh…well, sort of. But it wasn’t important.”

“You got all nervous. Sounds important. Anything I can help with?”

Y/n raised her brow. “You say that like you’d actually get me out of trouble. Will you get me out of jail if I murdered someone?” A playful tone in her voice as she kissed her cheek.

“I’d probably do it. Can’t say I won’t.” Alex grinned as she kissed her forehead again. “But don’t avoid the question.”

Y/n sighed softly as she closed her eyes, begging anyone that this would go okay. “Okay…I did want to say something, but I thought maybe it wasn’t the best moment to say it since it was through the phone and it was literally 3 am in the morning, so I held myself back from saying anything.”

Alex nodded. “Okay…I’m listening.” Y/n looked up at Alex and bit her lips, a hint of fear could be seen in her eyes and for a moment Alex regretted that she brought it up.

“I know we’ve been only dating for 4 months but…I love you, Alex.” Y/n smiled. “And you definitely don’t have to say it back. I’d understand entirely if this caught you off guard. I don’t expect anything back.”

Alex’s face softened at the words, her heartbeat racing as y/n spoke. She placed her hands on y/n’s cheeks and chuckled softly. “My love, stop rambling.”

Y/n sighed. “Sorry.”

Alex smiled. “I love you too.”

Y/n looked at Alex with a relieved expression, smiling softly. “You do?”

“Of course I do. How could I not? You’re the best thing that has ever happened to me.” Alex pulled her close and kissed her lips softly.

“Now who’s cheesy?” Y/n whispered against her lips, kissing her again.

Alex chuckled softly as she pulled away, stroking her cheeks softly. “Hey…I know you want nothing but to sleep all day but…how about you sleep at my place tonight?”

Y/n tilted her head. “Sure, what time do you want me to meet you there?”

Alex bit her lip softly as she smiled. “How about I give you my keys and you wait for me? Get some sleep, something to eat, and I’ll get home after 7 pm.”

“Are you sure? I mean, I know I’ve stayed there but-“

“I’m sure.”

Y/n smiled softly as she nodded. “Okay. Sounds like a plan.” She tilted her head. “Do you mind if I shower there?”

“Not at all, you know where the towels are.” Alex went ahead to her purse and got her keys out, going back to y/n and handing her the keys. “Went grocery shopping already so fridge is kinda full, use whatever you need, and get some rest.” She kissed her forehead softly. “And thank you for the sandwich and the coffee.”

“Yes, ma’am.” Y/n chuckled as she leaned in to kiss her lips softly. “I’ll see you later. Will go to my apartment first for a bag.” She kissed her lips one last time. “I love you.”

“I love you too. Be safe.”

Alex smiled and blushed slightly as y/n blew her a kiss as she walked out of the office. She sighed happily as she returned to her desk. Never in a million years would she think that she’d be all in love with a beautiful girl, but things were definitely getting serious, and she was happy about it.

********************

Alex stood in front of her door trying to find her keys on her purse, cursing under her breath as she tried to remember where she had left them. Then a heavenly smell made her look up at her door, a smile appearing on her face as she remembered y/n was inside. She knocked on the door softly and waited, hearing footsteps approaching the door. As soon as the door opened, Alex looked up at her and her heart warmed at the sight of y/n smiling at her. She had spent the weekends with Alex before, whenever she didn’t have any shifts, but seeing her dressed so casually, was probably one of Alex’s favorite things.

“I love the way you’re looking at me, but I don’t think the pasta I’m cooking will agree with us.” Y/n grinned.

Alex chuckled as she walked into the apartment, pecking her lips softly. “Hi baby.”

“Hi.” Y/n whispered against her lips. “Back to the kitchen, your keys are in its place.” She went back almost running to the kitchen.

Alex closed the door behind her and locked it, putting both her coat and purse on the rack beside the door and taking her shoes off. She moaned quietly as her feet hit the cold floor, finally getting off those ridiculous heels she’s been wearing all day. She massaged the back of her neck as she walked to the kitchen, wanting to see what y/n was making for them. She smiled softly as she saw y/n working around her kitchen; y/n was definitely better at cooking, she always made sure to make either breakfast or dinner for them, knowing perfectly that it was the only times Alex actually had a proper meal that wasn’t a grilled cheese or take out. Alex couldn’t help but notice that she was wearing her Harvard hoodie, the smile never leaving her face; she definitely looked better in it, but she wouldn’t admit it. She walked to y/n and wrapped her arms around her waist, kissing the side of her neck softly.

“I see you got a new hoodie.” Alex whispered softly.

“Don’t tell my girlfriend, but I actually stole it from her closet. She’ll have it back, I just forgot to bring a hoodie and was cold.” Y/n chuckled softly and grabbed a bit of the pasta she had in front, blowing in it and putting her hand under it so it wouldn’t fall, turning slowly to Alex. “Taste it.”

Alex took the bite and sighed softly, closing her eyes. “Delicious.” She smiled as she looked at Y/n. “My favorite.”

Y/n shrugged. “I wanted to spoil you.” She smiled.

“Did you get some sleep?”

Y/n nodded. “I took a shower and then I was dead to the world for about 8 hrs. I got up and I decided to make dinner.” She smiled. “Go get changed while I serve dinner.”

“You really didn’t have to, but I appreciate it, love.” Alex kissed her cheek softly and disappeared into her room.

Once Alex was back, they both had dinner quietly at first, just enjoying each other’s company until y/n asked about Alex’s day, knowing that Alex had been stressed and maybe she needed to talk about it, so the rest of the dinner went with Alex letting all the stress and frustration she felt inside. As they finished dinner, Alex cleaned the kitchen telling y/n she’d meet her in bed soon. Even after all these months of getting to know each other and dating, Alex hadn’t had the guts to tell y/n that she normally took anxiety and sleeping pills to help her out a bit. It’s something she had put out there before, that she had both anxiety and insomnia, but somehow, telling y/n about it seemed a bit too much at the moment. She checked that doors and windows were closed, lights out and she then headed to her room, finding y/n reading a book while she waited for Alex. Alex stood there for a moment, thinking that she really could get used to this. She first went to the bathroom to brush her teeth and then walked to the bed and sat down, moving closer to y/n as she tried to see what she was reading.

“I thought you’d be reading a medical book or journal. Didn’t think you were a fantasy fan.” Alex grinned.

Y/n chuckled as she closed the book. “Well, sometimes it’s nice to get out of reality for at least a second.” She looked at Alex and smiled. “And it’s a romance novel.”

“Which are mostly based on fantasy. They make it seem too unrealistic, like in the movies.” Alex raised her brows as she teased.

“You’re no fun, Cabot.” Y/n rolled her eyes playfully and placed the book on the nightstand, turning off her light. She turned back to Alex and leaned in to kiss her lips softly. “So, what is realistic for Alexandra Cabot when it comes to romance?”

Alex sighed as she thought about it, grinning as she looked at y/n. “This. Us. Just…I don’t know. I like the way we work together.”

Y/n smiled. “I do too.”

“I wouldn’t change it for a thing.” Alex caressed y/n’s cheek and gave her a soft kiss. “C’mon, I’m sure you still want more sleep even after the 8 hrs.”

“It’ll definitely be better now that you’re here.” Y/n smiled and moved to Alex’s arms, resting her head against her chest. “Love you.”

Alex smiled softly and wrapped her arms around her tightly, kissing her forehead softly. “Love you too.”

The moment she felt y/n’s slow breath, she smiled and closed her eyes, falling asleep right after.

********************

Alex opened her eyes slowly, the sun coming through her window, making her groan a bit as she figured that she had to get up soon to get ready for work. But then something hit her, making her furrow her brows as she looked at the window; she hadn’t taken her sleeping pills. She opened her drawer trying to figure out if she probably didn’t because she ran out of or because she just forgot, but the bottle had enough for the next few weeks, so maybe she just forgot. She put it back inside and turned to look at y/n who was sound asleep. She laid there for a moment, a faint smile on her face as she thought back to all these months they’ve been together. She thought she was truly stupid or just an idiot, how could she not figure out that she slept so much better whenever y/n stayed because she was with y/n. It was the best sleep she got, feeling her close to her, whether she was in her arms or Alex was in her arms, just her presence made Alex feel so safe. And it took her all this time to figure out y/n helped her sleep better.

Alex laid there for a moment until she moved closer to y/n, her arm sneaking around her waist and pulling her closer, laying kisses on her naked shoulder and up her neck. Y/n sighed softly as she moved back into Alex, smiling softly but kept her eyes closed. Alex noticed and chuckled, leaving more kisses in her neck and up her jawline, she felt a bit bad about waking her up, but she really wanted to enjoy her morning before she got a call from someone from the precinct.

“I won’t mind waking up at all if this is the way you wake me up.” Y/n whispered softly, the raspy tone noticeable.

Alex kissed her shoulder and smiled. “I’d love to do that every day then. Sadly, I cannot do that when you stay at the hospital.”

Y/n chuckled, opened her eyes, and turned enough to look at Alex, one of her hands laying in Alex’s so she would leave it there. “Fair enough.” She leaned up and pecked her lips. “Morning.”

“Morning.” Alex smiled and leaned down to kiss her lips more properly. “I’m feeling some pancakes. Why do you say?”

“I can make some.”

“No, I meant I could order some.”

Y/n smiled. “You spoil me too much.”

“I love doing that a lot.” Alex kissed the tip of her nose. “Regular, chocolate or blueberry?” She moved to grab her phone and sit up in bed.

“Surprise me.” Y/n did the same and kissed Alex’s shoulder before she got up.

********************

“Alex?” Olivia asked softly as she knocked on her door.

Alex looked up and smiled. “Liv, hi. Can I help you?”

Olivia furrowed her brows as she walked into the office and sat down on one of the chairs. “I need a search warrant for the Levy case.”

Alex nodded. “What do you need it for?”

“We discovered that he might be hiding evidence, he collects prizes after rapping the girls and he could be keeping them in a special box. He also collects the underwear, so that might give us enough for an easy win.”

“And where did you get this information from?”

“One of the victims.”

Alex nodded. “Okay, I have an arraignment in an hour, I’ll try to find Petrovsky before that, and I’ll send it your way.” She smiled softly and went back to her paperwork.

Olivia furrowed her brows. “How’s your day been?”

Alex looked up at Olivia and smiled, a confused look on her face. “Uh…good? I guess?”

“A few weeks ago you looked like if we said something wrong, you’d throw us whatever you had on your reach. And now you look so…happy.”

Alex blushed slightly at the comment, knowing perfectly why she was like this. She took off her glasses and cleared her throat, looking down at her hands for a moment. “I’ve uh…I’ve been seeing someone. In the last few months. And…I figured out that whenever she stays for the night…I feel safe and comfortable that I wake up feeling so much better and well rested.” She smiled as she looked up at Olivia.

Olivia smiled, everything making sense now. “Does she lives with you now?”

Alex sighed as she looked down at her glasses, her fingers playing with them. “Not exactly. I mean- she has been coming to see me whenever her shifts end and then she goes back to my apartment.”

“So she basically already lives there.” Olivia chuckled.

Alex huffed a chuckle. “I’m an idiot for not asking her, huh?” She looked back at Olivia. “I’m afraid she’s not in the same page and I’ll ruin everything.”

“Alex, honey, she’s already staying with you every now and then. What if you’re also her comfort and that’s why she goes back to you every end of shift? Have you ever thought about it that way?”

Alex stared at Olivia for a moment, thinking back that she hasn’t. “Not exactly.”

Olivia nodded. “Ask her, and I’m sure she’ll say yes.”

Alex smiled. “I will.”

“How long have you been thinking about it?”

“Uh…2 months?” Olivia tilted her head. “Alex.”

“I know, I know. I will ask her.”

Olivia nodded. “You better, or I will for you.” She grinned as she chuckled, making Alex laugh.

********************

After the conversation with Olivia, Alex had in mind for 4 days how it would go down, or…overthought about how it could all go really down. She kept thinking over and over again how she could ask her. Was she supposed to just drop the question? Give her a key? Make a long ass conversation about it and then ask? Alex had never asked anyone to move in with her, hell she hasn’t even mentioned her anxiety and sleeping pills. She knew they’d come up at some point, but she didn’t know how to bring them up, she didn’t know how to ask y/n. Y/n had been braver than her when she told Alex she loved her, because it would’ve taken Alex another 2 to 3 months to tell her, just like the last 2 months that she let pass by and now she was having a hard time figuring out how she could ask her. She kept checking the time, waiting for it to be 9 pm, which was when y/n ended her shift. She knew today she was not coming to her apartment since it was late, and y/n’s apartment was closer to the hospital than Alex’s.

Alex sighed and went to her room, sitting down on her bed and looking at her pills. Was it too early to take them? Would she need them? She knew she’d definitely need them, but she was still in denial of taking them, but they had been so busy these past few days that y/n had not been able to come back to Alex’s, so she has been having a hard time to sleep. She sighed softly as she grabbed them and was about to grab the pill when she heard a knock on her door. She furrowed her brows but left the bottle in bed and walked out of her room. For a slight moment she felt a bit frightened because not everyone knew where she lived, but the moment she looked through the small hole in the door, she felt her heartbeat calming down and she sighed softly as she opened the door.

“Y/n, I was waiting to call you to ask if you were home safe.” Alex smiled softly but then her smile disappeared as she noticed y/n’s face. “Baby, what’s wrong?”

Y/n swallowed hard as she looked up at Alex, trying to hold back her tears. “I uh- I know I was…not supposed to come today. I’m…I’m sure you’re exhausted. God, I’m so exhausted.” She covered her face with her hands as she sighed. “But I needed to see you.” She said softly almost in a cry as she looked back at Alex, tears forming in her eyes.

Alex quickly wrapped her arm around her shoulders and pulled her into the apartment, closing and locking the door quickly to give full attention to y/n. “What happened? Are you hurt?”

Y/n shook her head, letting Alex take her backpack and her coat off her. “I lost someone. In the ER.” She finally let the tears roll down as she sobbed. “S-She was so y-young. She was only ten. And I…I tried to help to stop…to stop the bleeding. We took her for an emergency surgery and she…she didn’t make it.”

Alex sighed softly as she wrapped her arms around y/n. “Love, I’m so sorry.” She kissed her forehead softly.

“It’s not the first patient but…Alex she was okay when she got there. And 10 minutes later, she was complaining about a pain, and she passed out. She looked so terrified and I…I couldn’t do anything else.” Y/n wrapped her arms around Alex’s waist and buried her face on her neck. “I should’ve done more. I should’ve hurried up and not think she was okay.”

“You did what you could. And I’m sure anyone would’ve done the same things you did.” Alex kissed her forehead again, walking them to the couch.

Y/n sighed softly as she leaned into Alex again, trying to stop her tears. “They already talked to me and said I did every possible thing but just…god.” She rubbed her face. “They saw me so bad that they gave me a week off, paid. They told Anika to take the week off too, she was as freaked out as I was, I mean…she was in charge, it was her OR.” She chuckled sadly. “

You need some rest and to clear your mind. You’re amazing, love. You all did everything.” Alex whispered softly, grabbing her hand.

Y/n nodded as she sniffled. “I’m sorry I…I just…I didn’t want to be alone. I just needed you.” She whispered softly as she pulled away enough to look at Alex. “I’m sure you’re tired and just wanted to sleep.”

“No, baby. I was waiting to call you.” Alex smiled. “And I’m actually really happy that your first thought was to come to me and not go to your apartment.” She let go of her hand and stroked her cheek softly. “I’m here whenever you need me, and when I’m not, I’m just a call away.”

Y/n smiled softly. “I love you.”

“I love you more.” Alex smiled and pecked her lips softly.

“I didn’t bring any clothes, I uh…I just came straight from the hospital.“

Alex thought for a second and thought it was now or never; could be the worst time but it could also be the best chance. “Maybe you should have clothes here. I mean…I don’t mind sharing mine. You look lovely in them.” She chuckled.

Y/n furrowed her brows as she smiled. “So I should just…bring my clothes in here? For when I stay?”

Alex bit her lip softly for a moment as she stared into those lovely eyes she loved so much. “Yes. But…maybe…maybe you should always stay.”

Y/n grinned softly. “Alex, baby…I know you can talk better than this. I’ve seen you in court.” She chuckled as she wiped away the last tears from her eyes.

Alex chuckled softly as she shook her head. “I’m sorry I’m…a bit nervous.” She smiled as she sighed. “What I mean…I’d like for you to move in, with me.”

Y/n’s face softened, tears forming in her eyes again. “Really?”

Alex nodded. “You know…I love the fact that you first thought about coming here because you needed me, because I need you as well.” She took a deep breath. “I suffer from anxiety, and I have trouble sleeping, insomnia. I took pills and I…I never told you because I didn’t think it’d be important. But when you’re here…when you stay with me, it’s the best sleep I have and I just live having you here with me. And if I can do the same for you…I’d do it every single day. Because I love you. And I’ll always be here.”

Y/n smiled through her tears. “Alex.”

“Oh, my darling. I didn’t mean to make you cry.” Alex wiped her tears and kissed her forehead softly.

“They’re happy tears.” Y/n smiled. “I’d love to move in with you. I wish you could’ve told me about your anxiety and trouble to sleep. I’d have moved in since our first date.” They both laughed.

Alex shrugged. “I wouldn’t have minded that.” She grinned as they laughed. “But I mean it. I don’t want you to ever go.”

“Then I won’t.” Y/n smiled. “My lease is due next month actually. So…guess it was the perfect time to bring this up.” She chuckled. “I…wanted to bring it up but I was also a bit nervous.”

“Guess we both overthought so much about it.” Alex chuckled.

“Well, I’m glad you brought it up.” Y/n leaned in and kissed her lips. “Thank you.”

Alex tilted her head. “For what?”

“For being you. For loving me. For being here.” Y/n smiled.

“I should thank you for the same things.” Alex smiled. “Hey, how about we order something. I’ll ask for tomorrow off so I’m here with you.”

Y/n nodded. “Sounds good.” She smiled. “Could we…maybe…take a bath together?” She bit her lip as she looked at Alex.

Alex chuckled and nodded. “I don’t see why not.” She kissed her forehead softly before the two of them headed to her bedroom. Their bedroom.

#alex cabot x reader #alexandra cabot #alex cabot #svu fic #law and order svu #svu #alex cabot fic

[angelasscribbles]

All That She Wants Chapter 3: Let's Talk

Series: All That She Wants

Fandom: The Royal Romance

Pairings for this chapter: Riley x Drake

Word Count: 1,264

Rating: M

Warnings for this chapter: tiny flakes of lemon

My other stuff: Master List.

Sweat beaded on his forehead, matting his hair and dripping onto the glistening skin of the woman writhing underneath him.

It had been a month since Drake had taken Riley back to his room and done all the things he’d fantasized about for so long. She’d come back the next day and the day after that.

And then she’d gone back to being friendly and polite, but nothing more.

Until tonight.

Though he had been determined to demand a conversation, all his resolve had crumbled the moment he’d opened his door to find her standing on the other side.

He had given in to her so easily, and now her legs were wrapped around his waist, her nails sunk into the tanned flesh of his shoulder blades, and his cock was buried deep inside her.

His name fell from her lips as she shuddered beneath him, and he slammed into her one last time, sending streams of milky hot liquid erupting into her.

He nuzzled into the side of her neck as he caught his breath, unwilling to move off her just yet.

He wasn’t ready for this to be over.

He breathed in the scent of lilac and lavender mingled with sweat and sex. His tongue and lips trailed down her supple skin, the taste salty and sweet.

She made approving noises at first, but then she pushed at him to get him to roll off her. “It’s hot and you’re sweaty.”

“So are you.” He countered, but he complied by dropping his body onto the mattress next to her.

“Yes, I know. I need to borrow your shower.”

The unspoken part hung in the air between them. She couldn’t go back to her husband reeking of sex.

They lay side by side for several long minutes; him searching her face for something he couldn’t quite find.

Part of him was afraid of scaring her away, but a bigger part needed to know what was going on. He couldn’t face the prospect of her leaving and him not knowing if or when he’d see her again. “Listen, Riley. We need to talk.”

“About?”

“What we’re doing here.”

“I thought that was obvious.”

“Haha. Seriously. Listen. I know I have a reputation, Riley, but—”

She cut him off with an incredulous laugh. “You say that like it’s not a well-deserved reputation. You’ve been with a lot of women!”

He blew out a breath of frustration. “I have been with a lot of women, but—”

“It’s okay, Drake. You’re safe.” She sat up and swung her legs over the edge of the bed. “I know you don’t do relationships, and I’m not asking you for one. I get it.”

“No, you don’t!” He shot upright, grabbed her arm, and pulled her back. “I want a relationship, Riley!”

She gave him a puzzled look as she shifted her body into the same cross-legged sitting position he had settled into. “No, you don’t. In the entire time I’ve known you, you’ve never dated the same woman for more than a few weeks. And it’s not for lack of opportunity. They throw themselves at you. I’ve seen it.”

His eyes searched her face for any trace of jealousy. “Does that bother you?”

Her brows furrowed momentarily. “What?”

“The women, Riley!” He exploded. “Do you care, even a little, when you see me with someone else?”

He read nothing but confusion in her eyes as she shook her head, “Why would you think—”

“Because it fucking kills me every time I see you with Liam, that’s why! I thought it was just me, all one-sided, but then you… this happened…” he gestured between them.

“What are you saying, Drake?”

“I’m saying that I want a fucking relationship, Riley, but the woman I want it with married my best friend!”

“I…I didn’t know…” she looked stricken.

His voice went quiet as he asked, “Is that why you didn’t give me the courtesy of a heads-up before you got engaged?”

Her eyes filled with tears. “Oh my god, Drake! I had no idea that you ever had feelings like that for anyone, much less for me!”

“Yeah, well, I am in ample possession of plenty of feelings… I just don’t see the point of sharing them with most people.”

“I don’t know what to say. I never knew you felt that way.”

“Why did you think that night happened?”

“Um…. Because you’re Drake Walker and you sleep with anyone and everyone?”

“I do not!”

She arched her eyebrows.

“Okay, I have been around the block a time or two, but do you really think I would have slept with someone Liam was interested in if I didn’t have genuine feelings for them?”

She twirled a loose strand of hair around a fingertip as she considered that. “I mean…we had been drinking, so I chalked it up to that.”

“Would it have made a difference if I’d told you how I felt?”

“Back then? No.” She had been too in love with Liam to give serious consideration to anyone else.

“And now?”

“Drake…I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to lead you on or anything. I assumed this was just fun and games for you. You know I love Liam. I married him!”

His eyes squeezed shut, pain swirling through him. His voice was clipped as he bit out, “Then why are you here?”

Her gaze drank him in as she considered whether or not to confide in him. One look into his misery-filled eyes convinced her that he was never going to use anything she told him against her.

She could trust him.

Her eyes were trained on her fingers as they twisted the edge of the sheet. Drawing a shaky breath, she admitted, “I can’t remember the last time Liam touched me.”

Drake went still as a soft, “Ah.” slipped from his lips.

She looked up, stunned at the tone she detected in his voice. “You’re not surprised.”

He sighed, unwilling to divulge Liam’s secrets no matter how in love he was with Riley. He hadn’t known they weren’t sleeping together, but in light of the information, he did know exactly why.

Seeing a possible way out without lying, he opted for a truth that wasn’t the whole truth. “I didn’t realize that you two weren’t…. I mean…” a crimson flush crawled up his neck and spread across his face as he stumbled over his words.

For the first time since they started this serious conversation, Riley laughed. It was a short, ironic laugh. She reached for his hand. “Geeze, Drake, after what we just did, are you really afraid to use words like sleeping together? Having sex?” She leaned closer with a hint of provocation lacing her voice. “Fucking?”

The flush went a shade deeper. “Riley!”

Her eyes traced across his face in pleased astonishment. Drake Walker, a known lothario, had somehow regressed into a skittish schoolboy because of her.

She couldn’t repress the smile or the soft laugh that burst out of her at the realization. Her fingers flew to her lips to try to cover it, but he noticed.

“Fuck!” He dropped his face into his hands to hide it from her. “I’m sorry for acting like an idiot.”

“No,” she reached out and gently pried his hands away from his face. “I like this new side of you.”

“Really?” He lifted his head and gazed at her with such tender hope and tortured longing that her heart stuttered in her chest, and butterflies exploded through her.

Well, shit.

That hadn’t been part of the plan.

#the royal romance #trr #drake walker #the royal romance fanfic #drake x mc #drake x riley #angelasscribbles #choices #choices fic writers creations #cfwc fics of the week #choices stories you play #choices trr #trr au #trr au fanfic

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

finally at that age where i'm thinking i should get a tattoo. not bc i feel strongly about it, just seems like a waste not to. i've got so much skin i'm not using

#feels so selfish like. all this skin what am i saving it for? #open to design suggestions! (please make me regret this offer) #maybe some deep sea horrors. a pretty watercolor of a gulper eel #once saw a person on the subway with various Skeleton Tattoos on all their limbs #i respected their commitment to the theme #but more than that i respected how all the skeletons were engaged in Activities #dancing in a ballgown. juggling its own (and two other???) skulls. swordfighting. being a mermaid skeleton #ANYWAY. the only reason i haven't already gotten tattoos is i just couldn't be bothered #i'm old enough to know i don't have any strong-but-potentially-temporary feelings driving me towards it #aesthetically i prefer decorated to non-decorated surfaces. but i'm not artistic or thrilled with commitment #honestly it feels like sheer laziness. indecisiveness--nay. immaturity!--that i HAVEN'T gotten a tattoo yet #letting all this blank canvas go to waste. tut tut i need to grow up and be an adult and get a tattoo sleeve already. #really i've put off my responsibilities long enough #(in fairness i DID at one time have 18 different piercings) #(but i took most of them out bc they interfere with wearing headphones and/or shoving my face in my pillow during Sleep Time) #(i only kept the nape piercing bc oddly enough it ended up being the most convenient. and the least painful to get now i think about it.) #(neck piercing? no problem. normal pair of earrings? Tribulations And Suffering. i don't make the rules i just poke them with a stick.)

[felicityphoenix5]

um. hi. scowen?

How would I rate them, 1-10: solid 7 if we're talkin rats 14 if we're talkin empires

Why I would pair them: just cuz yknow 👍

Thoughts on their dynamic: (imma go with empires for this one) THEY. THEY THEY THEY THEY THEY. BESTIES UR HONOUR <33

Do I think they'd raise anything together, be they pets or children: wheat (empires) and plants (rats)

Is there a dynamic I prefer for them: nope

Would they live together: YES

Could I pair them as anything but platonic: in empires, no. no. in rats, yessssssss nods nods

Do they have nicknames for each other: yes. maybe. idk

Song I associate with this pairing: i have absolutely no idea by me

#i need to like. engage more with this pairing #but they cool :] #ask #the mutual ask tag #ask game #ask game answers

[tariah23]

I rly don’t see how ppl be 20+ shipping kids anymore tbh… like, it’s so rampant and I don’t see the appeal to it anymore being as tho I’m in my late 20’s.

#I’m grown….. it always baffles me to see it like man I don’t care I don’t find joy in it anymore since I’m not a teenager #I just look at them and think they’re like my fake son… daughter nephew niece whatever lol #give me the struggling and mentally fucked up 20+ year old give me those middle age bitches man if I’m going to like a ship now anyway #like i don’t care about the romance between kids man it sucks that this is such a huge thing in most fandom spaces #not that I participate in said spaces since ppl are annoying and embarrassing #also very nasty #sns is diff tho like that’s a whole other thing 🪽 #sns is just a classic it’s legendary it transcends space and time it it- #I’m so glad that jjk is full of adults tho lmfaoo #one of Gege’s only W’s… especially impressive for a shounen #i like jjk outside of the goiji pairings too like I just genuinely enjoy it despite how awful it is now lol #again #I do think that ppl need to learn how to become more comfortable with enjoying media outside of shipping tho #like there’s nothing wrong with it obviously but I’m talking more like how tons of ppl only get into a new series for the sole purpose #of shipping instead of engaging with said media and the story that it’s trying to tell… #this is why fanon and wild insane hc’s usually get out of control too to the point where those who might be interested in checking out #a series might be deterred because they don’t even know what the show is about because the only stuff that ppl see about the thing is ship #stuff and like discourse #and the behavior of the fans… #these ppl be 30+ arguing with teenagers man it’s crazy to me #I just think there needs to be a balance lol #like still go crazy. Have fun and all but you get it #but anyway. with all that being said! Goiji stays winning in my heart 🚶🏾‍♀️ #rambling

[kdsburneraccount]

every now and then i feel tempted to make some kind of thinkpiece abt how the patriots ruined the ecosystem of nfl rpf but tbf its more like there were a couple of really avid edelmandola fans that only wrote that pairing from like 2015-2019 ish and then like general consequences of a team being mega dominant for an extended amount of time

#this is why im an advocate for parity in sports otherwise the fanfic content gets really saturated w certain pairings #and then you have to make your own food #but also like it's more fun to watch sports when there's parity imo #so i guess yeah the patriots did ruin the ecosystem of nfl rpf #but its better now so i think fandom just has ebbs and flows of like what's popular and what's not #corresponding with which sports teams are good and stuff #all we need are more fans of different teams and then the selection becomes more diverse i guess #also can be seen in hockey/baseball/tennis/f1 rpf #tho i guess tennis is kind of egregious considering one pairing makes up like 27% of the fics 💀 no parity there lol #whereas the most popular ships usually comprise around 10% ish? edelmandola cutting it close #but i kind of consider that pairing an outlier bc of general engagement/the way it looks like a couple of rly invested fans #im kinda rambling if you guys have any input feel free to add #nfl #new england patriots #kinda #fandom #ao3 #rpf #sports rpf #nfl rpf

[iturbide]

I'm curious, what would your ideal FE be?

And do you have any particular FE concepts in mind?

So, fun fact: I actually talked about this a while back.

...and by 'a while back,' I mean 'five years ago,' because time is soup.

So because that's a heck of a lot longer than I remember and a lot changes in that amount of time, let's come at this fresh and see what changes and what doesn't.

So I still really want to keep the lead character concept: dual sword/mage older sister and priest younger brother (with natural promotion to dual healer/mage) is a nice shift on the usual Fire Emblem formula, where we rarely see female Lords in the lead who are set to inherit the throne or male healers (and I can't recall the last time one was a prince, barring Brady with Chrom as his father and I guess Forrest though he's not in the immediate line of succession since he's Siegbert's cousin meaning Xander and Siegbert would need to be removed from the equation before he'd be in line for the throne but since Leo's a prince I think that technically akes him one too and now I'm just going down a rabbit hole of technicalities).

Intro/tutorial would be fairly run-of-the-mill, border skirmish type thing against a small incursion from a neighboring nation and going out to take care of it. But something I think would be fascinating is an expansion on the usual mid-battle recruitment and the option to spare foes that we saw at times in Three Houses: I want every main chapter enemy to have a name and unique portrait. I want there to be a frankly ridiculous number of characters who could theoretically be recruited depending on who approaches them, and I want every enemy to have an option to spare them even if they're not recruited.

Think of it: you go into battle and you see that every enemy is an individual. Every enemy is someone you can engage with. And you can approach any one of them with any of your units and talk to them. As you play, you start to get to know the different personalities of your units: someone may have a kind and gentle approach that's more likely to convince someone who's not exactly keen on fighting -- but that same approach might get steamrolled over by another person that's more set in their ways. Conversely, one of your units might be blunt and straightforward, and could butt heads in a constructive way with someone like that, but whose approach would scare off a more timid foe. Maybe approaching another unit with a character just recruited in the same battle can be helpful -- one of them bringing a friend or close ally over, because they don't want to hurt each other -- or maybe it can backfire spectacularly, with the enemy unit accusing your new ally of stabbing his comrades in the back, which shuts down all attempts at conversation.

It could be an interesting risk/reward system that encourages getting familiar with your various units beyond just their mechanical strengths and weaknesses: knowing their personalities and being able to employ them to take enemies off the field and bloodlessly thin the ranks could be a lot of fun -- plus, it's something that's not required. You don't have to try and bring them to your side -- you can breeze past those little dialogue snippets and just take them out if you want. And at the end of combat, if they weren't recruited, you have an option to spare them or kill them. If you spare them, you might see them again in another battle, and maybe they'll remember you: maybe you'll have another chance to recruit them, and more success the second time around because your actions challenged their preconceived notions about you. If you kill them, though, you might run into someone else later on -- a sibling, a relative, a friend -- who can't be reached at all because their quest is one of vengeance against the one that murdered someone they loved.

And then: what if that built into Supports. What if recruiting units off the battlefield had long-running effects based on how that unit was used? If someone was initially hesitant to join you, and then you bench them permanently, maybe they desert your force after a while because they felt isolated and lacked any kind of community since no work had been done building a new support network for them. Maybe someone else was a little too eager to join based on their impression of your army, and if you build out their Supports it becomes clear that their character has goals that are entirely at odds with the main characters' -- but because those Supports also gave them an understanding of the disconnect, they end up betraying you at some point to get what they want. Recruitment becomes a mechanic that needs to be considered, rather than just a 'collect them all' thing, because indiscriminate recruiting can backfire on you down the road.

With that many characters, of course, it would be completely insane to have all of them as combat units -- so what if some recruits unlock camp options. Maybe they're hesitant to fight against their own people directly, but they want to help and learn more about your force, so they offer non-combat skills: cooking, hunting, fishing, foraging, various sorts of combat/weaponry training, medical aid, merchant services. Similar to Three Houses monastery activities, you can pick a couple of combat units and send them to do different tasks that help keep your forces in fighting shape, building support bonds and learning things about the non-combat units in the process.

One thing I definitely want to see though is a reversal on the stereotypical Divine Dragon and Evil Dragon dichotomy. I want the main characters to talk about their Divine with absolute reverence, I want them to refer to their Divine as their protector and guardian, I want them to make their Divine out to be so kind and compassionate -- and then at some point deep in the game, I want it revealed that their Divine is the one that's seen as that world's Ultimate Evil. I want their Divine to look incredibly daunting, too, big and dark and toothy and terrifying -- but the main characters have nothing but respect for it, and it's eventually proven (maybe through calling it for aid against the threat of the neighboring nation's Divine) that their faith is not misplaced nor mistaken, and their Divine is everything they claim it is.

I still really like the split narrative concept, too, with the two siblings having different stories and different objectives: the kidnapped brother would likely have missions emphasizing escape or endurance (which takes advantage of his status as a healer), while the questing sister would have more objectives to rout an enemy or defeat a particular foe. Odds are that the narrative would begin with a single straightforward story, then split at the kidnapping, and only join together again at the very end before the closing chapters (so you could bring your favorites from both sides of the story to the final confrontation, but wouldn't get all the out of battle/camp stuff).

And above all: I wouldn't want it to be a story that ends with unification under a single banner. A lot of Fire Emblem games have this as their 'ideal' final state, and that's just never worked for me. I would want every nation to remain independent -- maybe with more connections, an openness to diplomatic discussion and free trade, possibly some leadership changes -- rather than having one country dissolved into another.

#answered #unsuspecting-person #extra fun fact: this has been in my inbox for weeks #because i was sure i'd talked about something like this before #i just couldn't remember when or where #it took me this long to find it #because again: five years is a really long time #because of the heavy emphasis on support building #the system for building support points would need tweaking #so that it's not a pain to achieve like it is in engage #pair up/adjutants and out of battle activities are a must #also the open recruitment/unique character stuff #would have to be main story only #skirmishes would be way too much to manage #maybe there would be one specific skirmish recruit #a merchant or something #but most skirmishes would be against puppets/constructs #for more incidental things: only one gen and no timeskip #the thing about character diversity and sensible armor stands #and way more support options #romantic platonic all kinds of rivalries from friendly to bitter #i want it all #this is way too complicated for a fire emblem #but it doesn't stop me from thinking about it a lot #i already have part of a character roster #because of course i do

[valeechtine]

See I keep being like Haha being on my period really isn't that bad I don't mind it ^w^ And then I forget that the hormones make me like. Horrid.

#Realized a horrid complex I have abt like. Feeling like my ocs and espec sonas are both too boring #for anyone to really like. Want to engage with or interact with or think about unless I talk abt them first #but also I feel like I have to make them more bland so that I can scramble for characfer interactions #bc its hard to visually pair them with other people and I worry they'll be like Too Much #and I'm realizing that this is just like. So contradictory that its stupid #I never let myself put much stock into my own ocs bc I feel like its like. Humiliating? Embarassing? To care abt them more then other peopl #and I really like getting engrossed with other peoples ocs and its really not fair if me to hold other people to the same #like absurd level I'm at. I need to calm myself down and just get into my own ocs and sonas regardless of outside input #but oh lord is that easy to say and hard to execute #negative