#i promise it doesn't hurt | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

smile-files · 3 months

Text

as a jew, seeing what all of these israeli leaders have said is sickening. as a jew, anti-palestinian rhetoric is sickening. as a jew, zionism is sickening.

how dare my people -- a people who've been massacred, ethnically cleansed, dehumanized, forcibly removed, and discriminated on religious grounds for their entire existence -- do the same to another people? how dare we turn our backs on them, when they suffer like we have?

i understand that so much of us have been fed zionist propaganda our entire lives; the same happened to me. i understand the desire for a homeland where we don't have to fear antisemitism at every turn; i want that too. but it doesn't take much thought to understand that a homeland for us, which actively oppresses and kills another people, is antithetical to what we want.

if you, as a member of an oppressed group, believe that your freedom and safety can only exist when you oppress another group, you are acting no better than the people who oppressed you. such a belief is horrible, and cynical, and wrong.

as a jew, i want jewish people to be happy and safe and connected to our heritage; as a jew, i also want other peoples to be happy and safe and connected to their heritage.

don't call the palestinians "amalek". you are turning us into amalek.

doesn't the torah tell us to have empathy for those beaten down by the world? doesn't the torah tell us to make the world a better place? doesn't the torah tell us to free people of their shackles and help them escape oppression?

i have so many israeli aunts and uncles and cousins; i fear for their safety. of course, my parents do as well. i'm worried that this fear, in addition to anything they were led to believe earlier in life, is placing my parents even deeper in the zionist camp. but it doesn't have to be this way! my relatives' safety does not rely on the continued oppression of gaza!

it is easy to be uninformed, to be swayed by propaganda, to blindly hope that israel was founded in good faith -- but we can't lie to ourselves. a world steeped in senseless hatred (which we are now promoting!) could never be a home for us. none of us are free, liberated, equal, until all of us are.

as a jew, to other jews, i implore that we stand with our palestinian siblings. i want us all to be happy and safe. i want us all to live in harmony -- in the holy land and around the world. that is what we all deserve. <3

#melonposting #i apologize for not reblogging/posting much stuff about israel/palestine until now #i kept having this fear that my mom would see and get angry at me #but what do i care? i want both jews and palestinians to be happy #oh yeah. and i keep hearing the argument that 'jews living in the holy land before israel was established weren't treated well'#i don't know if that's true or not... but does it matter?#like of course antisemitism is horrible. but that can be dealt with #forcibly taking over their land is not the answer #like if israel were never a thing and people saw that jews living in the holy land didn't have rights #they'd do something about it!#and if you think they wouldn't (which is a fair thing to think)... well then you should do something about it!!!#don't solve oppression with more oppression you idiot!!!!!#no positive change will ever come to a world which doesn't think positive change can happen #and oppression is not positive change.#and it also pains me how so much of zionist rhetoric feeds off of post-holocaust fear #and i get it. i get that in the mid 20th century we were so scared and angry after the holocaust #and that we desperately wanted a safe haven #i will never not empathize with that fear and rage because it's justified #but that is no excuse to oppress another group of people. there are other ways to be safe and happy i promise #just stop hurting each other... please... you're not helping anyone...#palestine #israel #zionism

62 notes · View notes

lucyvaleheart · 1 month

Text

i need to be chained down

i need to struggle against my bonds, need to cry need to scream, need to feel so utterly helpless and vulnerable

i need it to hurt. I need my ass to be smacked so red that it it brings real tears to my eyes before we're even halfway through. i need the wood of the paddle to SNAP and splinter as it breaks against my body.

i need to be told the most disgusting, cruel, awful things about myself; i need to be degraded and made to feel so small and pathetic and worthless and stupid and i need to be crying on the floor, utterly limp in my bonds from it.

i want to be marked. i want to feel teeth, i want to feel claws, i want my skin to break from the force of them i want to feel the blade against me i want to feel the fear in my whole being as it goes further and further and further

i need to be owned, to be claimed, to be branded with a hot iron, to be caged up and collared. need that collar to shock me, need someone to own me, need someone to hold my remote and press the button until i can't breathe until im choking with sobs and crying on the floor for a second time

when i say i need to be broken

i need to be broken.

#original #.......i'm in a mood #a very very very desperate mood #a very masochist mood #i just. god i want to be utterly eviscerated right now #want to just be taken advantage of so badly #want to hurt.#want to REALLY hurt.#want to really realy really really hurt.#sigh #one day ill find someone willing to do this kinda shit to me #in the meantime ill just keep working on communication and stuff so that when i inevitavbly find them scared to indulge themselves #i can reassure them and make them feel safe and loved before and after #aftercare after this kind of a scene would be life-savingly vital for both sides #so much cuddling and loving and reassurance and care #fucking breaks my heart when i hear a domme doesn't get that especially a sadist #anyway #cmere and ill show you how to break me. if this appeals to you say hi. please. i promise i will be so wonderful for you. i promise #i will help and i will lvoe and care for you even after you break me like this

31 notes · View notes

mokutone · 1 year

Text

late entry for 4th day of @tendaysoftenzo ! the prompt was:

Day 4, November 4th: Science Fiction | Wild West (Cowboys)

mostly because i really missed drawing space stations shgkshgksjdhgskdjhg

#tendaysoftenzo #my art #naruto #yamato #tenzō #yamato tenzo #kakashi #research station au #implied violence ?#it ends kind of abruptly and threateningly but like. tenzō is not going to kill kakashi and probably will avoid even hurting him too badly #usually he uses his mokuton to immobilize people + u can see throughout the comic he gets progressively more distressed as he realizes #kakashi's getting closer and closer to realizing that the Rogue Specimen is actually the nice young man sole survivior in the medical coat #so he doesn't like. Want to hurt. Kakashi.#so i imagine probably what happens is he immobilizes and disarms kakashi and starts trying to work on an Exit Strategy #meanwhile kakashi pulls out the good old power of friendship #the seductive promise of trust. of being able to relax because you know at least one person is on your corner. pspspsps. undo the mokuton

537 notes · View notes

lavenderpanic · 3 months

Text

Not the Peggy dickriders missing the point so hard they stumble their way into my conversation about how I don't like that Peggy "Nazi sympathizer" Carter has displaced other female characters and characters of color in favor of heteronormative, poorly written plots about characters that we left behind five years ago

#obviously i'm criticizing the WRITERS who WROTE the FICTIONAL CHARACTER who DOESN'T ACTUALLY EXIST #she isn't real i promise i didn't hurt her feelings lmfaoooo #anti peggy carter #<- block that tag if you're pro-peggy btw #so you don't have to see my appropriately-tagged posts hating on your white feminist girlboss

29 notes · View notes

cattatoir · 9 months

Text

I think I have unpopular Sandman takes bc I'm usually on his side

#like I would also not promise not to take revenge like maybe you shouldn't do things...to make him take revenge and just accept the possible #consequences #but uh I also assume he wouldn't have done much to the kid #and I'm not on the pregnant lady's side #Like obviously as a human Empathy for your loss #But letting the universe start falling to pieces and acting like you're somehow OWED a child with your dead husband #not to mention owed your dead husband #is so incredibly selfish #not to mention compounding the issue by apparently trying so hard to avoid the consequences of your action that you #a) refuse to accept your kid is like never gonna be a human and it's entirely your fault #b) try and fuck with the fabric of the universe AGAIN #like the consequence of her kid being taken from her probably way earlier than he would have to become Dream #That's like Minimum punishment imo #Being a parent is I'm sure a horrifying and painful thing to deal with a lot as is losing your husbandf #but I'm not going so far to valorize someone's individual pain that they don't have any responsibility for their stupid fucking actions #sorry it hurts and sucks but uh the universe doesn't owe you SHit #and I'm only for robbing it if you're like #eating the rich or fighting god not fucking over everyone else who you don't care about because you're a jerk #cmo's log #he's totally wrong for not forgiving his ex tho. WACK get over yourself you big fucking baby #get wreckt

54 notes · View notes

officersnickers · 26 days

Text

when the memory hits but you still can't process it 🤷

17 notes · View notes

frecklystars · 8 months

Text

#vent art #first time drawing starscream in uhhh. hot. hot fucking minute there #i was shaky the entire time but drawing plankton helped a lot. plankton is safe #theyre both my number one main f/os. and idk i feel like... if you're starscream and if ur wife looks at u #and her ptsd is suddenly triggered. well. now she cant look at u anymore. that cant feel good can it #who else knows her and loves her like you do? some loud human-ish lifeform with a long ponytail #he sees you hurting. he sits in that grass with you. and you let him. bc he knows what it's like to miss her too #she doesn't fear him. but she doesn't see him as often. and he misses her terribly just like you do.#just as much as you miss her. even if it's a different kind of yearning. and he's hurting now too on her behalf #and you bond with this. this. pathetic lifeform. and youve become this. this. this... pathetic. pathetic! broken thing!#you know she'll come back you know she'll come back you KNOW IT #because doesn't she find you in every universe? and didn't you make promises? and doesn't she always keep them?#but maybe this universe is too broken and maybe she's too broken. maybe she *can't* come back #she's trying. you know she's trying. you FEEL it. what are you supposed to do in the meantime #you're starscream. you're lord starscream and you're lonely and your starflower can't fucking look at you #to no fault of hers and to no fault of yours. it's just what happened. you're in shock. and you're hurting.#this love still isn't temporary. and you still can't imagine your life without her.#and you wish you could obliterate whoever made her feel so fucking scared of you #fuck the person who dared to hurt that one good thing you ever had #you arent a religious mech but you pray and beg to primus your starflower comes back #because you dont know what youll do if she never does #and frankly. she doesn't either. you were her favorite weren't you? and suddenly you're something feared #you've always wanted to be feared but NEVER by her. she is the last person you'd ever want to be feared by #doesn't she miss your voice? haven't you told her with your own vocalizer how much you love and miss her? why doesn't she hear you anymore?#you don't know it but she is terrified of losing you. but she isn't here to tell you that. is she.#it's just you and this stupid nicely dressed copepod who wants to dominate the fast food industry #while your little starflower is laying in a pink bed in a pink land with pink people. and she's crying over you #throwing herself at universes with brooding men with soft voices. but none of them are ever going to feel as good as you made her feel #she misses you but you don't know it because she. can't. even. fucking. look. at. you.#what do you do. what do you do. do you come back? please come back. this ache in your chest is too fucking much. come. back.

31 notes · View notes

introspectivememories · 11 months

Text

obsessed with the damian and bernard dynamic.

#two of my favorite blorbos #their talks def go smth like this #dami: this where i learned at the tender age of 7 to kill a man dowd #bear: cowabummer!#dami talking very earnestly about how he was cnfused and scared when he first came to gtham and that led to him taking his anger out on tim #but still i must make amends for the hurt i have caused. i shall endeavor to one day apologize to drake no matter how ill it makes me #bear laughing: why do you gotta apologize dude? you were like 10. i promise you tim doesn't even think about it #dami: how can he not!#bear slowly realizing dami is serious about this:... bc u were 10. you were a child. and children lash out when they're put in uncomfortabl #situations. and bc it would be pathetic for tim to have beef with a 10 year old. i promise you he doesn't even think about it.#also he told me he said smth like 'here on my world we call this a handshake' when u first met. i woulda whooped his ass too.#but also bear not treating dami like a child and i think dami respects that #and dami not treating bear like he's a fragile civilian #and bear appreciates that yknow.#very much a 'tim will try to coddle you bc he thinks you're safer not knowing about any of this but ill tell u the truth'#bernard dowd #damian wayne #dc

44 notes · View notes

certainmaybe · 2 months

Text

Because you don't care

It had been a good month since Supervillain had won. Almost the same amount of time since their team had fallen apart. From what Second in Command heard, the others had more or less kept in contact. They were a family after all. More than colleagues. Friends. And then there was Second in Command, the ever opposing force who had made every single one of them lose their temper at least once.

Had they hoped one of the others might contact them? Maybe. Were they better off alone? Definitely.

So it had been a good month since that. And then, in the middle of the night, Leader called.

“What the hell to you want?” Second in Command bit in to the phone with all the annoyance they could bring up when less then a second ago they had been sleeping.

“Second in Command,” Leader said. Their voice was distorted by the phone.

“If you tell me this is the wrong number I swear to god I’m going to kill you.”

“Funny. Because that’s kind of why I called.”

“You want me to kill you?”

“I want you to stop me from killing myself.” Suddenly the room was upside down. And then it was right again, but Second in Command was the wrong way round. They were sitting straight, feeling cold all over.

“This is a joke, right?”

“I’m afraid not. I- I have a gun, and I just- Second in Command it would be so easy. And I know it is selfish, I know the others need me, but I can’t fix this. I can’t fix anything.”

“Okay,” said Second in command, because what else were they supposed to say. Their mouth felt dry. “What do you need me to do?”

There was a horrifyingly long break before Leader spoke again. “Just stay on the phone with me? Talk to me, try to distract me, so I can stop thinking about… this.”

“Distract you? Okay, I- where are you now? It sounds like you are outside, are you outside?”

“Do you remember the skyscraper?”

“There are like a million skyscrapers in this city.”

“You are right, sorry. The one where-”

“I know, Leader, I am on my way.” Second in Command didn’t even bother getting dressed, they walked out in their pajamas, jogging to their cars. Of course only one of them could fly.

“You don’t need to- I know I am already asking a lot of you, calling in the middle of the night. Making you come here would just be selfish. If you can just stay on the phone with me I think I can make it.”

“Well guess what, you don’t get to tell me what to do any more, I quit, remember?” The car was finally starting and Second in Command knew that they were fucking this up. What Leader needed now, well, Second in Command had no idea, but it certainly wasn’t fighting with the one person they had fought with for years.

“Okay, you want a distraction. Tell me about your day. What did you do?”

“Not much. Nothing that would be worth talking about.”

“That’s a bullshit excuse and you know it, tell me what the fuck you did.”

“I visited Sunshine. They haven’t been taking it well, they… they don’t really eat any more, I think, unless I make them, so I try to visit at least two times a day. So I visited them for breakfast. And then I tried to get Hero to go out. They have locked himself into what is left of our base, they are convinced they can still defeat Supervillain somehow. I have been trying to slowly break it to them that there is just no hope, but they are- well, they are grieving. Then the police called because of Fighter, they got into another fight. So I bailed them out. Then I visited Sunshine again, and then I drove Scientist home from the bar- they have started drinking again, I’m trying to get them clean but there is no talking to them. And then- well, then I called you.”

“So during your whole day, during which you spent time with four people who love you dearly, not once did it occur to you to talk to them?”

“They need me to be strong right now. If they saw me like this- I couldn’t do that to them.”

“But you can do it to me, typical.”

“Well you don’t care about me. It wouldn’t hurt you, even if I killed myself. That’s what I always admired about you, how you manage to keep your distance from everything.”

“Fuck you.” Second in Command was standing in front of the skyscraper. 20 fucking levels. They didn’t even glance at the elevator before starting to jog up the stairs. “You think I don’t fucking care? What, just because I don’t make a speech about how much I love you all every time somebody gets a paper cut? You really just saw somebody with a hard childhood and an attachment disorder and decided that they couldn’t possibly care about anybody or anything. Well guess what, I do fucking care. I care so fucking much that I am going to strangle you my self for doing this, so don’t you dare kill your self before I get to you. I don’t care, you absolute prick. I’m sorry we don’t all get hugged by our parents.”

“I am so sorry, Second in Command, I shouldn’t have called. I should have asked how you are doing, this must have been just as hard for you-”

“Shut up you self sacrificing prick. I knew from the beginning this was going to blow up in out face, I told you so, I am fine. I am angry as fuck at all of you for not listening to me earlyer, especially you, but I already told you that. If I have a problem, you will know it.”

Second in Command was out of breath. They were also finally on the roof, where Leader stood, with such an expression of deep despair and acute horror on their face that Second in Command couldn’t do anything but ignore it.

“And now give me the fucking gun or I will take it from you.” Leaders hand was shaking badly as they did as told. The moment it was out of their hand they sank down on the floor, shaking.

For a few moments Second in Command thought about what to do. They really weren’t the person to turn to for comfort. Nobody had ever asked them to either.

“Fuck it,” they said out loud, opening their contact list and clicking on one of the first numbers.

“What are you doing?” Leader asked, still shaking on the floor.

“Calling Sunshine.”

“No, no, they can’t-”

“Well, I can’t either.” It took a while for Sunshine to answer. But they did, sounding like they had been crying.

“Second in Command?”

“The Skyscraper. Leader needs you. And bring food, I’m going to call the others.”

“Don’t, they don’t need-”

“Yes, they do need to see this. You all need to get your shit together, and from what I have seen so far you sentimental idiots need to actually get together to do that.”

Scientist was the next one on the list.

“Are you sober?” Second in Command asked without any prelude.

“No,” was the resigned answer. “What do you want?”

“Leader needs help, so I am calling a family meeting. Skyscraper, now, get yourself a taxi, if I catch you with a bottle I will kill you with it.”

“Since when do you call family meetings?”

“Since nobody else is stepping up. Now stop arguing and get our ass here now.”

The call ended with a click. Second in Command made an attempt to call Fighter, but as expected, they were in prison again. So Hero it was.

“Second in Command, what do you know?”

“I know that you have a problem, but right now Leader needs you more. Skyscraper, right now, and get Fighter out of jail first.”

“What do you mean Leader needs me, I just talked to them, they are fine.”

“No they are not, they are a filthy liar.”

“Shit. I’ll be there. Are they okay?” Second in Command looked down at the figure, still shaking on the floor.

“I don’t know.”

“I’m coming.”

And that was that. It was scarily silent on the roof, with the sound of cars in the far distance.

Scientist came first. They looked rough and smelled of puke. They took barely a second to look at Second in Command before they stumbled to Leader.

“What happened? Are you okay? Are you hurt? You don’t look okay, and if Second in Command called me- remember when I broke my leg and they told me to walk it off? If they called me to help you there is no way this is fine.”

“I’m sorry I let you down,” Second in Command heard Leader say. After that they decided to tune out.

The next person was Sunshine, carrying bags of take out. They looked thinner, dark circles under their eyes, but the way they immediately softened upon seeing Leader on the floor was familiar.

“Hey,” they said, sitting down next to Leader. “Do you want to tell me what’s going on?” Second in Command starred out into the city, feeling like a stranger in somebody else's home.

And then, finally, Hero and Fighter arrived. The door hadn’t even closed behind them before Second in Command pulled it open again.

“Where are you going?” asked Fighter, the last person still standing.

“Away. This is family business.”

“Exactly. You should be here.”

“I’m not part of the family.”

“Of course you are. You are the fucked up uncle from dads side who lives in a trailer and gives the children cigarettes.”

“That’s very specific.”

“And true.”

After a moment of silence Second in Command let the door fall close again. “Aren’t you going to go to them?”

“I’m afraid,” Fighter admitted. “Can I just stay with you for now?”

“It’s a free country.”

“Can I have a cigarette?"

“Absolutely not.”

“Damn it.”

#tw suicide #emotional whump #heroes and villains #heroxvillain #villain #snippet #hero #hurt/comfort #hurt/hurt #angst #I had a kind of bad suicidal episode yesterday and apparently writing this is my way of coping #I hope you are in the right frame of mind when reading this #don't kill your self #I promise you are worth it to fight for your life even if you might need to burden other people anything is better than loosing you #There are still sunsets to see and songs to sing and even if it doesn't feel like it now one day those things will make you feel joy again #And that little bit of joy is worth it as well #My rant is over now

17 notes · View notes

sophieswundergarten · 7 months

Note

Can I talk about the whole Reynie is a villain thing for a second because your Reynie in the snow story has been living in my brain RENT FREE since I read it and it WILL NOT LEAVE and can you just imagine building off of that to make him into a villain? (idk if you saw my comments or not on @nobodysdaydreams post but yeah)

Oh, absolutely. Go for it, friend!

I have a couple of ideas running around too (Several of them thanks to you!), but I'm super excited to hear your thoughts :D

#My brain has just decided to be goo at the moment #But I promise I'm working on a post about that stuff #Also #AFHJKHFSSAB #YOU LIKED MY STORY??????#THANK YOU??????#You're so amazing Kaslyn #And I can definitely see Reynie as a more 'well meaning' villain #He isn't TRYING to hurt people or scare them #But he's so single-minded in his goal to 'help' his family and prove himself #That he doesn't care about collateral damage #As I said #Working on a post about such things #But please by all means go nuts you have amazing ideas Kas <3 #And I believe I did see most of your comments on Bods' post and they were fantastic #the mysterious benedict society #mbs #reynie muldoon #Asks

19 notes · View notes

clerichs-xi · 4 months

Text

tender as a bruise, sharper than a razor wrap her tentacles around me like she'll never let me go

klaus' backstory arc just ended heho and it was revealed he used to be the lover of the goddess of storms and pirates... she had basically kidnapped him and imprisoned him into murder and piracy for 20 years and needless to say it greatly damaged him on every level <3 its okay he's been able to be normal for once since the start of the campaign thanks to the party aka his new found family

get urself a surrogate middle-aged father who can speedrun a forbidden romance in one minute and then immediately go to confront the darkest version/a corrupted version of himself, as well as his toxic lover as she tortures him -w-)b

details and just the lines hehe

#clerichs.png #my artwork #original character #original art #original illustration #digital art #digital painting #digital illustration #dnd character #oc #oc illustration #im so unnormal about him.#he got hurt soo badly in isolation... thats where all the scars in his ref came from </3 #this portrait is of the one scar his goddess did not give him.... </3 #tfw ur jealous sea goddess lover pits you against other pirates and sea monsters to fight for ur life and test ur devotion #and she promised to love you wholly only for u to realize she doesn't understand or know what love is #and only wanted it bc everyone else who had love seemed so happy and she wanted that too #so after she destroyed everything you loved (literally your entire world) she merely treats u as a possession for 20 years #and you don't know how to ask for love because you don't know how to love either so you resent her and everything and everyone #leading rage to build up within you and you willfully slaughtering so many things because you cant handle your emotions and pain #and after deflating and sinking into apathy a rogue priest manages to break ur exterior and touch you deeply enough to let you love again #and because of him you're able to begin breaking free of everything and you lose everything again but this time #this time you wake up in a crate of fish to outstretched hands and people who love you as family even after learning who you are/were #filling you with strength and willpower even as your goddess lover comes back swearing she loved you and loves you still #and she tortures you and threatens to take everything away again if you don't come back to her but because of your love for everyone #and their love for you youre able to hold fast long enough for them to break you out #his goddess made a copy of him by warping the body and soul of a naive young man in an attempt to replace him and fill the hole in her hear #he had to literally kill the darkest version of himself that hurt everyone and he laid him to rest... catharsis if ive ever seen it #as i said. im so normal about him <3 the guy i project onto the most ever #klaus lierstark

11 notes · View notes

amethystina · 8 months

Note

Hey <3 really sorry to bother you, I read Who Holds the Devil since day 1, I absolutely love it. Do you know when a new chapter will be posted ? Take care

Hi there! I'm glad that you like it! And thank you so much for staying faithful to the fic for so long 💜

Unfortunately, this is what we call "catching me at a bad time" since today I've received unsolicited criticism, opinions, and/or complaints (some of them valid) on three separate fics, from three different people. So I'm kind of having my doubts about the whole "writing fanfics" thing right now. Or at least the "posting fanfics" thing.

(That'll pass, don't worry. I'm just being dramatic because I'm still trying to process and overcome all these new doubts and anxieties I didn't ask for but suddenly have to deal with)

On top of that, you happen to be the second person to ask me this question today, which is in no way helping my current situation. I'm pretty sure that wasn't your intention, but yeah.

Also, I'm afraid I might be getting sick again so, uh, there's that, too.

So, to be entirely honest with you, I don't know. I had hoped to get back to it sooner than this, but things are kind of difficult right now even if we ignore the shitshow today has been for me, my confidence, and my writing.

As always, I promise I'll post as soon as I'm able but, right now, I can't say when that'll be. So please be patient for a little while longer :)

You take care too 💜

#Amethystina Replies #Anonymous #I promise it'll pass #And I will get back to writing it #Hopefully soon #Today is just a VERY bad day for this question #Because one of the fics in question was Who Holds the Devil #And... uh...#The comment hit me where it hurts #In that sort of way where even if it's just a single person saying their personal opinion #Which they're entitled to #And they claim it wasn't meant to be negative #I'm still second-guessing EVERYTHING now #Since it's such an important part of the fic #And something I take so much pride in #And it doesn't matter that it's one of the things other people have praised me for since the very beginning #Because anxiety doesn't care about logic #And all I can see is that I apparently failed at something I thought I was doing well on #So yeah #Today kind of sucks

21 notes · View notes

ask-the-sexyman-squad · 1 month

Note

you feel better now sam?

"..."

She...doesn't feel better, really. She stopped the heavy crying, sure, but she hasn't fully calmed down. It might take her some time...no one can blame her: personal jabs at her regarding her familial issues just...triggered something horrible in her, and she still feels very hurt. Now she's just tired...she needs the rest.

"...she's been crying for two hours, Alastor: we can't even calm her down."

"..."

"Alastor? Hon?"

"...I..."

...the smile on his face dropped the moment Sam closed her eyes, and he wiped her tears.

He had to stay strong for his little girl...his little girl. He never would've thought he would use those three words when speaking about her. Yet he simply did so, and it made him all the more soft. She was sweet, quiet, and had bursts of energy: he admired that. She was a good dancer, a singer, and loved anything about the Roaring Twenties: but she clung to him and trusted him, and that's what drew him to her.

This was his adoptive daughter now...his and DT's. He had to show her love, and not break promises. She didn't have to worry about him and DT drinking...which was good.

He was swarmed in his thoughts, he was tuning them out unintentionally. He was focused on getting Sam to calm down, but the more she cried, the more his heart shattered.

"...I failed her."

The tears said it all: literal. Tears. He cared for her more than he let on, and it was making him sentimental...in the best ways, however.

"You didn't fail her, hon."

"I did. I should've been there when that wretched anon shattered her with their commentary. I should've been there to comfort her sooner...but I wasn't."

"That doesn't mean you failed her. You found out when you could, and what matters is that she's safe in your arms. That she calms down."

"...but what if she doesn't...?"

"...you're going to hate this idea."

"How so...?"

"If she doesn't calm down in the next twenty minutes, we...we take her to Black Hat."

"...Black Hat."

There's fear and nervousness in his voice now. They tried to ease their husband by gently placing their hand on his leg.

"If she doesn't calm down. If she does, then disregard. I mean...everyone has already tried getting her to calm down, or talk...Mordecai hugged her for Christ's sake, and that didn't work! Ghirahim tried calming her by taking her hair down, but also nothing! Another person she confides in is Black Hat. He'll surely be able to calm her."

"...if you say so, my love."

"We'll get her through this...trust me."

#Sardonic Sexymen - Sam DT and Alastor #original post #art #fanart #original art #image reply #text reply #alastor #double trouble #samantha #implied radiotrouble #((sam REALLY doesn't feel good after that one anon...#((and honestly I don't feel good after that either #((because sam here is a self projection of myself so the anon that sent the parental issues ask was not only intentionally jabbing at her #((but they also jabbed at me #((and it took me a while to think it over and draw it #((because I didn't want to be rude and take the fun out of things!#((though I am saying: sam and i are THE same person. please be kinder when submitting stuff #((I don't talk about it but I REALLY didn't appreciate it. it hurt and it sucked #((I love my parents and they love me don't get me wrong #((but they just....broke some personal promises. and idk if I can forgive them for that yet #((this is a coping mechanism for me without thinking about (TW) killing myself #((drawing myself with these fictional characters puts me in a happy place and I'll keep it that way #((if you think me thinking of alastor as my fictional father figure is cringe then you can leave #((either way thank you for checking in on sam #((always appreciated <3

7 notes · View notes

coffee-n-some-cream · 9 months

Text

Here's a little Rasey meet cute snippet from a bigger project I'm working on. The story isn't Raph/Casey centric and I wasn't sure I was even gonna put the ship in, but apparently I can't help myself!

Casey Jones was on the hunt. Shrouded in a dark hood and menacing mask, he lurked in the shadows, watching over his city from the rooftops and striking fear into the hearts of friends and foe alike.

The lead of the pencil Casey was sketching with broke at the tip, and he sighed as he pushed more out. One sneaker-clad foot hung down, tapping a rhythm against the fire escape. His earbuds hung in a loop around his neck and pushed out music as loud as they could, the sound tinny and crunchy. His mask was pushed up onto the top of his head, and he stuck his tongue out as he concentrated on the drawing, filling in his hoodie with hatching. His own dark form crouched on the page, intense gaze peering out from his skull-like mask. He hummed, lightly sketched out a cape flowing dramatically from his back, then frowned and erased it. Nah, that looked stupid.

He glanced up to check the surrounding alleyways and streets for any nefarious criminals.

From the highest point, he could survey all of Brooklyn. He was an all-seeing watchdog, ready to sink his teeth into the neck of any foolish trespasser.

A breeze tousled his messy hair. He watched an empty plastic bag dance down an alley, listened to the rustle of a cat digging through the trash. Nothing. He sighed. Another dead night. Maybe he needed to take his act to another part of the city?

Movement along the rooftops caught his eye. He squinted and leaned forward, peering at the shadowy figure that was sprinting across roofs and hopping alleyway gaps with a speed and grace that was, frankly, unfair. Was that…? Casey shoved his hand in his backpack and frantically fished out his binoculars, wanting to get a good look at the person before they ran out of sight. But lucky for him, as he raised them to his eyes, the person paused on one of the rooftops and didn’t move.

A burly build, green skin, red bandana hanging around his shoulders. “Hello again,” Casey muttered to himself, zooming the binoculars in to get a better look at him. He was slumped over the edge of the rooftop, resting his arms on the ledge and letting his head hang down.

An old challenger returns.

Casey threw his things into his backpack, pulled his mask down over his face, and scrambled up. The clanging of the fire escape followed him as he made for the turtle mutant.

The night air was cool and felt good against the warmth of his skin. Raph took deep breaths, trying to let it soak into him, to temper the burning that was starting to choke him from the inside out, but it didn’t help any.

His brothers' eyes flashed through his mind. Worried, gentle, caring, unsure. Unsure what to say to him, what to do with him, but always trying to be understanding. They were everything but what they should be, which was angry. Resentful. They should even hate him a little bit. He knew they wouldn't. Couldn't. But they should.

He dug his fingernails into his arm, willing the skin to break and bleed. It didn't, of course. It held firm like soft leather. He squeezed his eyes shut and grimaced, the lump in his throat unbearable.

“Fuck,” he muttered, before taking one more deep breath and forcing himself to relax. His face, his throat, his back, his chest, his hands, all loosened the impossible tension he held them under. And slowly, his chin trembled, his lips pulled back, his throat pushed, and a sob fell out of his mouth.

He ducked his head down. It didn’t matter that he was entirely alone. His hands went over his face as another sob tore through him and tears started to pool in his palms. His breathing was haggard and quick no matter how he tried to deepen it, and his shoulders heaved. He let it go, knowing that the tears and the snot and the cries were the only way to loosen the knot in his chest, to quell the burning in his throat.

A shuffling of feet sounded to his left. He whipped his head up, jumping back and reaching one hand for the sai at his side.

“Woah there.” Hands up in surrender, the guy came to a halt. Hockey mask over his face, golf bag of old sports equipment on his back… it was the guy from the park. Casey Jones. Fucking Christ. “I come in peace.”

Raph eyed him up and down, taking in the relaxed stance and unassuming gaze. He let his hand fall from his sai and turned so he was staring over the ledge again, very aware of how he must look. Great. This total asshole of a stranger had caught him alone on a rooftop, bawling his eyes out. It made his hackles rise, and he opened his mouth to tell the guy to fuck off.

A little hiccup came out instead, and with that, he lost every ounce of energy he had to be upset. Instead of saying anything, he just gave the guy a watery glare.

Seeing that Raph wasn’t about to attack him, Casey moved a bit closer and leaned one hand casually against the ledge, propping the other one on his hip. He gave Raph a lidded look. “We meet again.”

Raph cocked a brow at him. “Uh-huh. What do you want?”

Casey shrugged. “Well, I was gonna challenge you to a duel, but seeing as you’re in the middle of crying, I’m gonna assume you’re not in the headspace for it.”

“I’m not in the middle of crying,” Raph lied, unsure why he was even trying.

“You very clearly are crying.”

“Also, a duel? Really? What, are we gonna turn our backs? Take ten paces?” He laughed a little at the ridiculous image. “Draw pistols?”

Raph couldn’t see it behind the mask, but Casey smiled at him. The turtle mutant looked so different without the mask over his eyes, face open and bare. He was an absolute mess. His face was covered in tears and snot, his eyes were red-rimmed, his cheeks were flushed, he looked miserable. His glare was still biting, his watery laugh was still deep and full. Something about it all tugged at Casey’s chest.

“Okay, fine, wise guy.” He stepped closer so he was right next to the mutant, put his back against the ledge, and tipped the mask back so it was on top of his head. “What do you wanna call it?”

“A fight.” The turtle wiped some of the snot off his face with the back of his hand, then turned his head to look at Casey full-on. “It’s just a fight.”

Casey sat under the heavy stare of both amber eyes for a moment. Then he rolled his eyes. “Pssshhh. Boring! Duel sounds way cooler. I don’t care if we have to break out the pistols, we’re gonna duel.”

The turtle shook his head, but a smile tugged at the corner of his lips. “You’re an idiot.”

“Yeah but in a cute way, right?”

Raph gave him an incredulous look and lied for the second time that night. “No. Not in a cute way.”

Casey shoved a fist against his chest. “Oof! Straight to the heart!” He leaned closer to Raph. “So… since we can’t duel because you’re crying and stuff–”

“Not crying.”

“Uh-huh. Do you wanna talk about why you’re crying?”

Raph gave him a truly disgusted look. “To you?”

“Why not?”

“You’re a total stranger, and the only other time I interacted with you, we were enemies.”

“Woah, woah, enemies? I wouldn’t say that.”

“We fought.”

“We dueled, totally different.”

Raph scoffed and looked away. Casey chewed on his lip, thinking, then slapped a hand against the turtle’s shoulder.

“You know what makes me feel better when everything is shit?”

Raph looked at him out of the corner of his eye. “...what?”

Casey pulled a baseball bat from the golf bag on his back and brandished it proudly. “Bustin’ heads.”

The turtle eyed the bat warily for a moment. “Uh, yeah, I noticed that’s how you get your kicks. You kinda have a hard time… stopping. Busting their heads, I mean.”

A shrug. “Yeah, sometimes. Don’t worry, I’ll be good.” He batted eyelashes at Raph and offered a winning grin. “C’mon.”

Raph pursed his lips, thinking that he should really be getting back because Leo did not like anyone being gone too long, especially when he was injured like this, when he couldn’t just get up and track them down. But Casey’s smile was lively and warm, and it was hard not to smile back.

“Alright.” He pushed away from the ledge and gave his face one last wipe to remove the evidence of his crying session. “I could go for some head-busting.”

“Hell yeah!” Casey grabbed his wrist to tug him toward the fire escape, then let go. “Hey, what’s your name by the way? Or, like, do you have a name?”

Raph looked down at his own wrist, then back up at Casey as he pulled his hockey mask back over his face. He actually looked kind of menacing, with a face of bone white and shadow, but Raph knew that the smile was still wide and burning bright under there. “It’s Raph.”

Casey swung down onto the fire escape. “They won’t know what hit ‘em, Raph!”

#my writing #fandom writings #fanfiction #fanfic #tmnt #teenage mutant ninja turtles #raph #raphael #casey jones #rasey #sorry this isn't very polished or interesting i promise its better in context #anyway have a meetcute (part 2 because they technically already met?)#this is from my own tmnt version where the turtles are genetically engineered to be super soldiers so raph has really tough skin #dulled pain receptors and he doesn't get hurt very easily #and it causes lots of guilt and stuff ofc lmao #idk if this is gonna go on ao3 cause i don't really like it enough

20 notes · View notes