#if u make skins like this pls show me i want to thank u personally and marvel at them

[mywillbedone]

every time someone designs a flight rising holiday skin with multigaze in mind, an angel gets its wings

#giving u a crisp high five and a baked good of your choice i love u #specifically this was inspired by flutterfall fable #but gilded sight is my alltime fav #not only add extra eyes but does so in a way that accommodates if they already have them #if u make skins like this pls show me i want to thank u personally and marvel at them

[tkaulitzlvr]

Im the type of person that wouldn’t do the silent treatment if Tom got me mad. I would stay out all night and not answer the phone just to make him mad. How would Tom react 👀?

PERSISTENT - T. KAULITZ

synopsis: after a fight with tom, you decide to go out clubbing, much to his annoyance. no matter how many times he calls, you ignore him, bringing him to his own breaking point. and once you come home, he doesn’t plan on going easy on you.

content: angst + mentions of smut, i’ll do a part 2 if u guys want lol

a/n: tom being rough and possessive is so hot like i would purposely piss him off just to see him mad… ANYWAYSS thank u for the req anon!! i’m so sorry if i haven’t done ur request i have like 50 in my inbox so it’s taking me a while but i don’t have an order of how i do them so it’s pretty random what i’ll choose to write but yea pls bare with me!!🙏🙏

“come on, i said i was sorry. you’re being so fucking dramatic.” tom says, standing on the other side of the room as my eyes are fixed on my phone screen, not paying any attention to what he is saying, still liking how the idea of punching his face sounds. he knows that he has fucked up, deciding to forget to show up to my family dinner yesterday, instead rehearsing with the band all day and crashing at bill’s place, not showing up until right now - 8:30pm the next day. and, he had dug himself an even bigger hole, telling me to ‘calm down’ when i expressed my anger towards his incompetence.

“am i?” i mutter sarcastically, refusing to make eye contact. unbeknownst to him, i was texting my friends, making sure that nobody had plans, organising the final details of which bar we would go to, deciding that if tom can stand me up without telling me, then i can go out partying as i please, whether he is aware or not.

he tuts beside me, his slow and tired steps trudging towards me as his figure falls onto the bed, the mattress dipping next to me. he places one hand on my ass, massaging the flesh lightly, his lips meeting my neck as he plants rough, open-mouthed kisses over the skin. i take no notice, continuing to tap the keys of my small smartphone, not at all tempted by his lazy advances.

“please baby…” he mutters against my neck, kissing the skin harshly between his words. “i’m sorry, let me make it up to you, hm? i’ll make you feel so good. just let me touch you princess, you’re so beautiful.”

his shitty attempts to win me over are almost pitiful, my body still as i try to stifle a laugh, a smile spreading across my face as the text that confirms that everyone can make it comes through. i say nothing, detaching tom’s arms from my lower back, getting up from the bed and walking towards the closet, picking out the sluttiest dress that i own, knowing how much tom hates me wearing it.

he watches me from the bed, his eyebrows furrowed, staying silent for a few seconds, yet the second he sees my hands grab hold of that dress, he sits up, his confused voice sounding through the bedroom.

“woah woah woah, what are you doing?” he asks, standing up and moving in front of me, attempting to block my way.

i simply roll my eyes, moving past him and placing the dress on the bed. “going out.” i shrug, my fingers reaching to the hem of my t-shirt, lifting the soft material upwards and over my head, tom watching me do so.

“wearing that? no you’re not.” he scoffs, quickly snatching the dress from the bed and holding it against his chest. i turn around, my upper half now completely bare besides from my bra, tom’s eyes focused on my cleavage, his expression still angry.

“stop playing and give me the fucking dress.” i sigh, holding my hand outwards and trying to snatch it from him.

“you’re not going out. not without me.” he reiterates, his grip on the material staying tight as he looks into my eyes, his tongue poking the inside of his lips.

“yes, i am.” i state, quickly snatching the dress from his hands and running to the bathroom, frantically locking the door before he can get to me, his fists colliding with it as he groans in frustration, a string of curses leaving his lips.

“you’re such a fucking brat, you know that? open the door and quit messing around. this shit isn’t funny.” he yells, repeatedly banging on the door.

however i am too busy slipping the dress onto my figure, adjusting the small straps and brushing my hair into a slick ponytail, applying some extremely rushed makeup, all whilst he continues to shout at me from the other side of the door, pointless apologies and pleads to let him in sounding throughout the bathroom. i hurriedly grab my heels, placing them on my feet and taking one last look at myself in the mirror. i had looked better on nights out, but tonight was about revenge, and whilst i didn’t look my best, i still looked hot. hot enough to drive tom absolutely insane - especially considering that he would have no idea where i was, looking like this all alone his biggest fear, partly out of concern for my safety, but it was mainly because of his jealous tendencies. and whenever i dressed like this, even if he stayed by my side at all times, he became more possessive than ever.

yet right now, i want to make him mad, desperate to get him to the point of utter insanity, seeking some form of payback for what he had done - not caring about the consequences.

i emerge from the bathroom, tom stood inches away from me. he raises his eyebrows, his gaze moving downwards as he studies every inch of my body.

“no fucking way are you leaving looking like this.” he starts, shaking his head as a sarcastic chuckle leaves his lips. “you must be insane if you think i’d let you. do you have any idea of the kind of people out there? fuck that.”

“since when can you tell me what to do?” i laugh, taken aback by his sudden attitude, pissed off at the way he tries to control me, especially after what he has already done.

“since i’m your fucking boyfriend, incase you had forgotten! only i get to see you looking like this, i’m not gonna let you leave the house alone, letting everyone see basically everything. don’t be ridiculous.” he tuts, narrowing his eyes as i can sense the irritation in his tone. “i said i was sorry. if that’s what this is about, then you’ve proven your point, great job. but i’m not letting you leave, not wearing that.”

“you don’t own me, i can do whatever the fuck i want.” i shrug, pulling my dress up a little higher just to frustrate him more, before rushing out of our bedroom and through the house, quickly slipping out of the front door before he can stop me. he frustratedly calls my name from behind, a chorus of curse words and irritated demands all along the lines of telling me to ‘come back’ spilling from his lips until i close the door, running to my friends car and hopping in.

i look at my phone, already seeing five missed calls and a few texts, some apologising again, others telling me to come back inside. i roll my eyes, putting my phone on silent and engaging in conversation until we arrive to the club, spilling out of the car.

the place is completely packed, excitement oozing through my veins as we rush towards the bar, ordering far more shots than necessary, but in the moment i didn’t care - my mind focuses on one thing: pissing tom off. and i know that the more drunk i get, the more angry he will become, the idea satisfying to me as i pick up the small glass. i hold it to my lips, some lipgloss smudging onto it, my head tilting backwards as i allow the liquid to slip downwards, burning the back of my throat. i wince slightly, the taste strong and bitter, yet that doesn’t stop me as i pick up another glass, swallowing the liquid inside of it as fast as i can, eager to feel its effects right now, tired of feeling sober.

my friend takes my hand as i quickly swallow the last of my drink, following her shaky footsteps, all of us beyond tipsy. we find our way to the dance floor, slotting between a couple too focused on swallowing each other’s faces to realise we had pushed them aside. the alcohol finally sinking into my system, bringing along with it a sense of freedom that i had missed so much. i sway my hips to the music, getting lost in the rhythm, a wide grin on my face.

༻❦༺

i have no idea how long i have been dancing for, or how long i have been at the club for. i probably can’t even count the amount of drinks i have had on my fingers, now completely wasted as i sloppily dance to the music, my arms in the air.

“come on, we’ve got more drinks!” i hear my friend call over from the couch area, her words slurred and almost inaudible.

i smile widely, awkwardly shuffling through the crowd and over to the table, my movements all over the place as i stumble towards the couch, flopping onto it. my eyes turn to the large tray of drinks, filled with an array of shots and cocktails, my hands reaching for whatever drink i can touch first - not exactly picky at this point, i’ve probably consumed every cocktail to exist in the past hour. the sweet taste washes over my tastebuds, it’s bitter aftertaste now normal to me as i swallow it with no reaction, drinking the liquid like it is water, feeling happier with each sip. i place the drink down, glancing momentarily to my phone for the first time since i had left, seeing that tom is calling me again, at least twenty unseen messages filling my inbox.

baby i said i was sorry, come on. - 9:52pm

seriously, this isn’t funny anymore. - 9:52pm

come home now, i’m worried about u. - 9:53pm

where the fuck are you?? - 9:54pm

i swear to god if you don’t pick up the fucking phone. - 9:56pm

do u think this is funny? do u know how worried i am?? answer the damn phone. - 9:58pm

answer the fucking phone. i swear to god once i find out where you are. - 10:01pm

i’m coming to find you. - 10:04pm

i roll my eyes, placing my phone back in my purse and picking up my drink, finishing the last of it and putting the empty glass on the table. the place starts to feel increasingly warm as i decide to get some fresh air, standing up slowly from my seat, almost toppling over from the amount of alcohol i had consumed.

“anyone coming for a smoke?” i ask, turning to my friends.

they all decline apart from one, resuming their conversation over the loud music as the two of us head outside, pushing the doors open, the cold air hitting my face and cooling me down immediately. i open my purse, taking a cig out and lighting it, bringing it to my lips as i inhale, closing my eyes. the smoke fills my lungs, bringing a small moment of calm despite the low buzz still in my body. i exhale slowly, watching the smoke pour from my lips, disappearing into the night as i lean backwards against the cold wall, it’s harshness causing me to shiver a little.

i take a few more drags, holding the cig in between my fingers, enjoying the small moment of peace. the streets are practically empty, apart from the large queue of people waiting to be let into the club beside me, the diluted thumping of music drowned out slightly. the roar of a car engine, one that sounds strangely familiar, pulls me out of my hazy moment, my eyes turning to the source of the sound. i can recognise that car from anywhere - it’s headlights getting closer and closer as i roll my eyes, turning around and attempting to blend in with the small crowd of people outside.

i sigh in relief as my plan is successful - or so i thought. the car drives past me for a few seconds, it’s tyres screeching to a stop as the door opens, tom stepping out of it. his eyes frantically scan the crowd, his entire expression disjointed, chest heaving up and down as he tries to spot me. apparently my attempt at cover doesn’t suffice as his eyes lock with mine, his face softening as he lets out a sigh of relief, rushing towards me.

i groan, knowing that there is no point in running - he will always catch me, wasting my energy trying to escape would be useless. he comes closer, pushing the drunken bodies aside until he is standing in front of me, his face angry.

“jesus fucking christ do you know how scared i was?” he shouts, roughly grabbing me by my waist and smashing his lips to mine. though i can tell that this isn’t to show his affection, rather it is a way for him to release a small amount of his frustration, this not even the beginning of it.

“no way, really?” i question sarcastically, gasping as i pretend to be shocked, still furious for the shit he pulled lastnight, not interested in his feeling right now.

“lose the fucking attitude. don’t think that you’re gonna get away with this. we’re leaving, get in the fucking car.” he says, clenching his jaw and grabbing my hand. though he is clearly furious, he takes it gently, maintaining a steady grip, still careful not to hurt me.

“what if i don’t want to leave?” i challenge, a satisfied smile on my face as i know exactly how to further his anger.

“you don’t have a choice.” he states, rolling his eyes as he begins to pull me towards his car, his breathing heavy, face stern. i know that i have pissed him off, and perhaps gone too far.

he opens the passenger door, and i step in sulkily, knowing that i have pushed my boundaries. i fold my arms, rolling my eyes as he slams the door shut, quickly walking around to the driver’s side, angrily getting in.

“never fucking good enough for you is it?” he mutters, swiping his tongue across his bottom lip as he sighs, roughly clicking his seatbelt on. “i told you i was sorry, but you had to be a brat about it.”

i stay silent, sinking further into my seat as he places his hand firmly on the gearstick, beginning to drive away.

“where’s your fucking attitude now, hm? pathetic.” he scoffs, turning to face me for a second as i refuse to make eye contact, embarrassed at my change in persona, slightly scared by his tone, knowing that i have fucked up.

his foot presses harshly against the accelerator, speeding up, letting out his anger as his hand clenches the gearstick, tugging it roughly, his veins flexing with each motion.

“just wait until we get home. i’m gonna fuck that attitude out of you, maybe it’ll teach you to stop being so stubborn all the damn time.”

i sense the sincerity in his tone, recognising that he is completely serious, deciding to stay quiet to avoid pissing him off further. yet i cannot ignore the aching between my thighs, slightly excited at his threat, secretly desperate to get home so that he can execute his promise.

time seems to work against me, each second feeling like hours as the silence between us only fuels the tension. i have never been so relieved to see our house come into view, waiting patiently as tom pulls in, turning the engine off and staying in his seat. he takes a deep breath, his tongue messing with the metal of his lip piercing before he opens his mouth to speak, refusing to make eye contact.

“upstairs. and do as i say this time, if you want to be walking tomorrow.”

requests are open! as i said veryyy full atm but if i like ur req i’ll do it straight away so keep sending them in!!

#tom kaulitz #kaulitz twins #tokiohotel #kaulitz #tom kaulitz x reader #tom kaulitz angst #tom kaulitz smut #tomkaulitz #tom kaulitz fluff #bill kaulitz

[fromepiximagines]

Be Still My Heart (Kenny Liu x fem!reader)

Summary: Kenny is relieved to see you safe after the awful night he spent at the station with Sara.

Word count: 920

Request: Hey theeeeeere! Thank you for replying to me and good luck with uni! Soooo ofc do it whenever u can and pls take your time! But I would reaaaally love smth fluff with Kenny x fem reader anything you want! Also 3rd person it's perfectly fine I love it don't worr about anything love💗💗💗

Rating: T

Warnings: spoilers for s2e9 and 10 of From, swearing, reader wears glasses, hugs, use of (Y/N), one (1) kith.

“This sucks.” (Y/N) mumbled.

Hidden in Victor’s old hideout, the one he so kindly showed her a few days before – ‘In case you wander too much’, he said -, she tried not to make any noises. There was no talisman inside, which meant the monsters outside could get in if they managed to unlock the tailgate.

It has been many, many hours since she got here alone, after going out to empty her head; people were dying, one after the other, more than ever before, and now they couldn’t sleep.

“Keep your eyes open, shitstain.” The woman whispered to herself, rubbing her eyes, back leaning against the metal wall. Her sight was trained on the tailgate, wondering why in the fuck she would wander off near nighttime – never again.

And then, a sliver of light passed by a tiny opening on the metal.

Too bright to be a flashlight.

(Y/N) scrambled up, face dangerously close to the cold metal, and peeked out.

“Sun, my beloved!” She shouted, and turned around. With ever raising excitement, she opened the latch and slid up the tailgate; the warm rays of sunshine hit her face with full force, and she leaped down onto the dewy grass.

The woman ran down the familiar path towards the town; by the diner, she waved at Mrs. Liu, Victor and Ethan, smiling as she saw the familiar faces.

“Morning, Jade!” (Y/N) shouted, slowing down as the curly-haired man left the bar with a frazzled look, some book in his hands.

“Where the hell have you been?!” He shouted back, brows furrowed.

“I was taking a walk, dude.” She replied, staring at him. “Where the fuck are you going, looking like my conspiracy theory uncle?”

“Oh, fuck off.”

“Don’t die!”

Jade grumbled something under his breath and left as (Y/N) headed, now walking at a decent pace, towards the Liu’s house.

The familiar sight of closed windows and an open door greeted the woman as she neared the place. She saw Sara leave the house with Boyd; nodded at them, and did her best to ignore the way her heart ached as her eyes focused on the man right behind the duo.

“Kenny.”

The ex-deputy looked up as (Y/N) whispered his name, brown eyes widening as he took in her messy appearance. Her hair was sticking up in weird angles, dark circles adorned her eyes (nothing new there, to be honest), and her glasses were kinda askew on her face.

A few seconds was all it took for the freckled man to run up to his friend and pull her into a tight hug. His arms circled her shoulders, and she sighed; he was warm. He smelled good. He was soft, comfortable-

She was sleep deprived.

“You’re alive.” Kenny said softly, nose nestled in the juncture of her neck and shoulder.

“Last I checked, yes.”

“I was worried, you dumbass.” He leaned back, staring into her eyes.

The tension between them was palpable as they locked eyes, the weight of their emotions hanging in the air. Kenny's words had hit her hard, stirring a whirlwind of worry within her. He couldn't bear the thought of losing her.

Her hands trembled slightly as she reached up to cup his cheeks, her touch gentle and filled with a mixture of affection and regret. Her thumbs traced tender circles against his skin, feeling the warmth gradually spread beneath her touch, a sign of their shared vulnerability.

With every passing moment, their faces drew closer, their breaths mingling. Their noses almost brushed against each other, creating a delicate connection that mirrored the fragile state of their hearts. It was a moment suspended in time, charged with longing and the unspoken desire for solace.

She mustered the courage to ask, her voice filled with a blend of uncertainty and hope, "I'm sorry... Can I kiss you?"

Kenny's response was barely a whisper, yet it carried the weight of his longing, "Please."

In that instant, their lips met, a gentle collision of souls seeking solace and reassurance. It was a tender, tentative kiss, born out of a shared understanding of their vulnerabilities. Their worries and fears melted away, replaced by a rush of affection and the undeniable connection between them.

Time seemed to stand still as they lost themselves in the softness of the moment. The world around them faded away, leaving only the sensation of their lips moving in sync, a dance of tenderness and forgiveness. It was a kiss that spoke volumes, expressing their unspoken apologies, their longing, and the depth of their feelings for one another.

In that single, stolen moment, they found solace and healing, their hearts intertwining in a profound embrace. And as they pulled away, breathless yet content, they knew that their bond had grown stronger, fortified by the power of their shared vulnerability and the healing a simple kiss could offer.

“Sorry to interrupt,” Boyd’s voice rang out, and the couple finally remembered there was an audience near them. “But we need Kenny right now, (Y/N).”

The woman felt her own face warm up now, and slowly let go of her friend’s face, arms hanging limply by her side.

“I’ll see you soon.” Kenny whispered, a small smile on his handsome face. “Really soon.”

“Be careful, okay?” (Y/N) whispered back, gaining a nod and a grin in response.

“Always.”

Right then and there, as she watched the trio walk off towards the forest, the woman sighed, with a lovestruck smile on her face.

“Be still, my fucking heart.”

Permanent taglist: @tiredwritersworld

I forgot the taglist, sorry guys :')

#kenny liu from #kenny liu x reader #kenny liu (from) #kenny liu #from mgm+ #from epix #from epix imagines #epix from #epix from imagine #from (epix) #jade herrera #boyd stevens #sara (from)

[chososdiscordkitten]

PLEASE GIVE ME SMUT WRUTING TIPS..GOJO BREEDING KINK MADE ME WANT TO WRITE SOMETHING FOR MYSELF. (EVEVN IF U DONT LIKE GS BREEDING KINK, ITS ONE OF UR BWSTS) PLEASE GIVE ME DIALOGUE WRITING HELP. HELPPPPP DONT LEAVE ME HELPLESS

UHHHH smut writing tips... hmmm. (yapping below the cut)

this may sound very wrong and not pc BUT, ive been reading smut for years. Since I was like 10, ive read countless different writing styles, and millions of words of pure filth.

And as I read them I developed a taste of what I like and don't like- I write in a way as though I am reading to the reader- you/your/yours, because I don't like y/n or I don't like using third person pov nor first person.

What I do- is I think of the scene, picture it and if I can't get a body part- or a hand placement correct, I go look at porn videos or hentai- whatever. Not because i derive like arousal from it- but I truly use it as a form of studying. (im asexual)

I also use shows, movies and songs for inspo- certain lyrics I can picture on x character I write down.

I find it helpful to use a physical notebook for my ideas, there are times I don't have access to my computer so actual paper helps.

And as for dialogue, I try to keep a mix of x characters physical state while they speak, an example;

("blah blah blah" she said, and he said "blah blah" and then-) ive never liked this specific kind of writing so I include the way their eyebrows furrow- or the way their nose crinkles after saying something.

with smut I think its helpful for the reader to picture the way x characters face churns, a trembling bottom lip, dilated pupils, it helps make everything seem more intimate and inclusive for the reader.

And when it comes to describing the way something feels- if its something small like a trailing touch- I take a second and do what im writing about onto myself-

example; if im writing about a gripping hand on a hip- ill press the tips of my fingers onto my thigh to see the way the skin indents and how it feels? (embarrassing)

One thing ive learned- just because you write it with a specific image in mind- doesn't mean people will be able to see it the way you do unless you provide details.

usually when im doing laundry or at work a specific sentence pops into my head that id picture x character saying.

Let's use gojo for example, in my head when I think of his dialogue I think of playful, sweet, but with kinda mean undertones. Because in the anime/manga he keeps a playful tone while saying some very mean things.

once ive finished a very rough first draft- I spell check everything and read it outloud to myself- I say the dialogue in the tone I pictured while writing to be sure it sounds correct. and if it doesn't I brainstorm different phrases or words. (use of different words is soo important.)

And once ive corrected any words that don't fit together- or changing certain things that make me squint- I feed it into Siri nd have it read it to me outloud while I follow the sentences.

I do this 3-4 times till the whole thing sounds correct and how I mean for it to be read.

And I do one final skim once I paste the story onto Tumblr.

it's a tedious process, I know, there's times where im on my 4th reread and it seems boring or uninteresting- but only because ive reread it a million times and combed through it carefully.

There are times where I think my writing sucks because it seems over processed it and it's not entertaining- but!!! I proceed regardless.

And remember- you shouldn't write for the likes of other people, write for yourself and to your likings.

The masses shouldn't tell you what you should enjoy writing, pls don't take this as rules or as like a demanding thing- this is just my personal experience and the way I like to do things.

Writing should be a fun hobby and something you do to get the filth out of your mind, nd im not a very big writer on here, so don't listen to me too much

thank u for the question :>>> (I know how it feels to reach out for some help anon, im happy you enjoy my writing enough to ask me this, ily)

#jjk #⋆ ˚｡ ⋆୨ten speaks୧⋆ ˚｡ ⋆ #jjk x reader #writing #⋆ ˚｡ ⋆୨10 asks୧⋆ ˚｡ ⋆

[bubbleystories]

Hi!! its my first fanfic lmao i was bored and had a lil dream abt someone as you can see not all of it but most of it...sorry if they are some word that are bad. english is not my first lang sorry yall!♡♡♡

CW: smut, beachsex, Richarlison×reader, fingering, publicmasturbation,..bitch idk what to say next its just smut so...

⚠️ minor get away satan!!⚠️ 18+ okayy 🚪👈 out you go...

Lets start!! hope yall like it pls review and tell me if you like it...and like it if you want more!!!!❤️✨️

It all started on the hot beach of rio de janeiro

the sun ray shineing you laying on the hot soft sand. Your boyfriend on his green sunchair under the coconut leaf unbrella.

You were sun bathing minding your buissnes

When someone or rather your now 1 year boyfriend Richarlison de Andrade famous footballer of Tottenham Hotspur.

He was on vacation in brasil vitsiting his family and his fav person his cute niece..He was on his phone takeing picture of the beautiful beach of brasil. When he turn his head to show his anjo. he saw her laying on her stomach in her brasil bikini that hug all of her beautiful body.

the oily yet sandy skin of his anjo shineing under the hot sun of brasil. he could resist takeing a picture to put on his insta story putting the a cute caption 《Meu anjo beijou o sol》

(My Sun Kissed Angel) With a brasil flag and a little sun.

Richy:"anjo? are you sleeping meu amor?" he said trowing a little send on her to tease her.

You:" Richy! No am not..i just shake my towel! why u do this. pombo"

Richy:"Pombo? really?" He laugh knowing you never call him this.

You:" what? its cute even your fan call you this" you smile look at thim through your black shades.

He look at you up and down with a funny side eye makeing you laugh. looking at the beach for a moment enjoying the waves then turning to look right back at you

his eye traveling down at your lower body makeing him smirk a plan forming in his mind.

Richy:" You know you look hot in my home contry flag on you" licking his lip looking at you deeply. knowing his eyes had effect on you.

You:"yeah? well thanks to my boyfriend he picked it out for me he really liked the smaller piece" you laugh looking at him turning on your back giveing him a full view of your front.

the small yet tight bikini huging all of your curves.

He smirk licking his lips swallowing his spit he got up his sunchair walking out of the shade

into the sun torward you kneeling right infront of your towel

Richy:" anjo você está me deixando louco

{Angel you are makeing me crazy}He said makeing you scoot to the side of the towel so he could lay beside you

Richy:" Your skin look so good in the sun anjo" He said laying on his side look at your neck eyes traveling down to your boobs. his hand lifting to go on your bikini strap playing with the hem of it...looking at you through your shades.

You:"What are u planing? huh? its always bad when you look at me like this" you said takeing off your shade getting on your elbow looking at him in the eyes leaning closer to him.

He lean in lips only a small inches from kissing me breath hot and lemony from the cocktail he just drank. when suddenly he pulled your bikini lace that it almost went down if you didn't catch it by reflects.

You look at him stunt brow joining together a lightly shook smile lookin at him.

He laugh looking at your expresion.

You:" richarlison!? seu louco come on there are people here" you said looking at him...trying to tie the lace of your bikini.{you crazy man}

Richy: "come on let me help you Meu anjo" he smile makeing you turn your back to him

You took your spear towel hideing your exposed boob so nobody could see it.

But mr.De Andrade had other plan than tie your lace..

He look at your back then at you his hand sneaking under the towel holding your boob

Makeing your beath hitch. neck turning to look at him shook but feeling good at the same time..

Richy:"anjo..looking at you like this all day made me feel all sort of things" He said lightly piching your nipple makeing you moan lowly

Head joining his shoulder Face hideing in his neck. he smirk looking at you submitting so quick with such a simple action.

You:"r-richy there are p-people...Porra.. here {fuck.}rolling your neck to the side all your body weight on him...giveing him access to your neck him going down to bite and kiss your neck hand going to to rest on his shoulder so you dont fall.

Richy:"você cheira tão bem que eu poderia comê-lo agora"{you smell so good i could eat you up right now} he moan in your neck still turning and flicking your nipple.

makeing your lower region wet cover by the towel he makes his other hand slide down your bottom bikini going inside slowly teaseing you his finger dance down between your folds going up teaseing your bud flicing it.

You:"Shit! richy dont stop eu amo tanto isso..

{ i love it so much}You moan lowly thanking the god watching over you that its a monday and not haveing many people on this side of the private beach.

He continue torturing your sensible bud senseing the knot forming inside of your stomach.

Richy:"Are you close anjo...could you wet my fingers..eu quero provar seu amor" { i wanna taste you love}

You:" am c-close richy...am gonna cum" you moan a little loudly your face in his neck kissing and sucking his warm skin. he hiss moveing his face to kiss you hard sucking and licking the inside of eachother mouth. enterring 2 finger inside of your heat you moan the knot finnaly snaped comeing hard on his fingers.

Richy:"that it anjo você fez tão bem "

{ you did so good} he said pulling his fingers out Putting them in his mouth tasteing you

"Tão bom como sempre" He smirk finaly Tieing your bikini lace {So good as always}.

Slowly comeing down your high you turn your body to face him looking at him in his eyes

Grabing his face kissing him hard tasteing yourself on his tounge.

Richy: "I hope you injoy our vacation anjo"

You:" ohh richy i am..but we are not done yet

We still need my play time now" You say smileing at him innocently while your hand rakes up his now tight shorts.

He hardly grab your hand and push down more on his shorts while smirking up at you

Licking his lips.

Richy:" Then lets not waste time and lets get real anjo.." He got up getting the towels rolling them in a ball to finaly push them in the bags.."levante-se agora anjo Vamos nos divertir! {lets go angel lets go have fun}

You could help but laugh outloud he was in his goofy side again...

#richarlison x reader #football x reader #richarlison #fanfiction #smut #richarlison smut #brasil #goofy ahh #first fanfic

[haywire-hetfield]

could u pls do 8 with james/jason? would really appreciate it

PS: i really love ur writing

probably forgot to add that but it would be nice if James said it but both is completely fine with me, whatever suits u more

Sure thing! And thank you so much, I appreciate it :)

Send me a number along with a pairing (or leave it as dealers choice if you dare) and I'll write you a snippet! (500 words or less)

8) "Can you feel how much I want you?"

Jason groaned as his back hit the wall. He’d walked off of stage less than two minutes ago and hadn’t been expected to find himself shoved against a wall in a darkened corner. He wasn’t complaining once he realized it was James pressing himself into his personal space. 

Their lips connected a second after his back and skull made contact with the hard wall. His hands found their way into James’ hair, ignoring the pain shooting through his spine and head. All he could focus on was the other man right now, tangling his fingers into blonde strands and pulling a bit too roughly. James seemed to be fine with it, letting out a quiet moan that was mostly muffled against Jason. 

In retaliation for Jason pulling his hair a bit too hard, James bit down on his lower lip. It was rough and Jason could taste his own blood, and it made his head dizzy from how good it all was. If they did this after every show for their rest of their lives, it still wouldn’t be often enough for him. 

They broke apart enough for them both to get some oxygen, Jason taking a harsh inhale as soon as he could. James looked like a mess from the show. His hair was messy and damp with sweat, eyes dilated as he looked back at Jason. He was gorgeous, he always was, and Jason already missed the feeling of his mouth. 

He wanted to say something, but James grabbing one of his hands distracted him from it. James led his hand down between their bodies, finally stopping to press Jason’s palm against the front of his jeans. Like this, Jason could feel just how hard James was already and he smirked at the blonde haired man. 

“You feel that, Jase? Can you feel how much I want you?” James asked quietly, still sounding a bit breathless from their kiss. Jason nodded even though he thought the question might be rhetorical, there was no way he couldn’t feel how needy James was for him. 

“You’ve got me,” Jason promised him, tugging him back in for another kiss. James went with him easily, this kiss being just as rough as the first one had been. Maybe even a bit more desperate now that they were both hard, although Jason was only halfway there. That didn’t stop him from touching James, palming him through his jeans and deciding they were wearing way too many layers. 

There wasn’t much they could do in the hallway where anywhere could stumble upon them, but he knew James would do as much as they thought they could get away with. James let out another soft cry against Jason’s skin when he rubbed a particularly sensitive spot. Of course, Jason focused himself there and basked in every noise he could draw from James. If he was crueler, he would make him come just like this. That was something he’d keep in mind for another time, though.

#jameson #smut #nsft #rpf #james hetfield x jason newsted #jason newsted x james hetfield #metallica #james hetfield #jason newsted #fanfiction #james hetfield smut #james hetfield nsft #jason newsted smut #jason newsted nsft #metallica smut #metallica nsft #asks

[poltergeist-coffee]

Pls talk about your InsaneDuo mermaid au

HEYYY ANON THANK YOU ENABELING ME <33

okay, so i have to give a little context for me and my friends mermaid au. it's just us taking the qsmp members and dunking them in the ocean. some of them became mermaids and some stayed as boring humans, what can you do?

the favela five are all mermaids in our au + richas is a human child they 'adopt' essentially!! This au is not......realistic at all because some mermaids are inspired by real sea animals (Cellbit is an octopus for example) and some are just like......... Ariel/fantasy mermaids (Forever is just a fish. his tail looks like a koi fish for the aesthetic but he's not. he's just a mermaid with a pretty tail and covered in scars) (his tail is dark gray with red/white splotches on it to look like his mc skin). all mermaids also have the cute ear fins you see in art sometimes? (if u know jrwi think of gillion-esque ear fins i don't know how to explain it)

Me and my friend also made an entire "courting ritual" and how mermaids do romance and stuff but that can be a separate post. what YOU need to know is that for mermaids to be "married" essentially they will have to rip one of the scales on their tail off and give it to the person they want to marry!!! married mermaids will take the scale from their partner and put it on their tail where they took their scale off to symbolize how they are together !!

basically, all i really wanted to tell you is that insaneduo in the mermaid au are married NDSAVKJASK they're in a pod (family) with the rest of the Favela five but their relationship is super close just like in the qsmp. they basically go everywhere with each other and even if they don't they're never far from one another. They just care about each other so much!!!

after one incident with forever being taken by mermaid hunters (he escaped dw) he had a bunch of large cuts and injuries on his tail because they wanted his scales. Since he lost a bunch of scales he just took one off him and gave it to cellbit because he loves him and wants him to know that he means a lot to him. cellbit was in shock for all of 5 seconds needing to process that his best friend is fucking bleeding and dying and also being the equivalent of proposed too. Cellbit then proceeded to rip one of his own scales off (octopuses don't have scales but please don't think too hard about it, its cute please suspend your disbelief) and gave it to forever. i think forever would probably start yelling at cellbit like “WHAT ARE YOU DOING THAT HURTS!!! DONT GIVE ME YOUR SCALE IDIOT!!” and cellbit is laughing at him (also in pain but that’s less important)

them trading scales is less of romantic marriage and more like "i love you and care about you a lot. i want to show my devotion to you and that i am willing to sacrifice things for you to be happy". cellbit wears forever's scale as a ring and forever keeps cellbit's on a bracelet instead of the traditional way.

also, did you know octopuses eat their own tentacles when stressed? right after the thing where forever got hurt and was having to rest to heal cellbit refused to leave him if he could help it. he nearly chewed off one of his own tentacles from worry because forever was so hurt and forever def scolded him for it after waking up.

TDLR: insaneduo in the mermaid au are best friends and the equivalent of married and care about each other so so much it makes me want to jump off a building

last thing id like to mention: cellbit is very curious about humans and wants to learn more about them! At the same time he is very weary of them because of what happened with forever and when forever meets phil he's very >:[[ about it. he doesn't think forever should be trying to talk with a fisherman so much because he could get hurt again!! it doesn't matter if this "Phil" is so nice and kind to him!! he might just want to hurt forever or keep him in a tank or take his scales!!

#✉️ asks or whatever #insaneduo #4bit #poltergeists mermaid au #<- this gets a tag because there will be more then one post #if anything in this post interests you please send me an ask about it!!!! i would love to talk about them more #also if YOU have things you want to say please say it <33 i love reading what people think!!!! #if anything is mispelled and shit im sorry i don't proof read KJNDVSKJANAD #anywayyyys i hope u enjoyed <33

[hannahlovesluca]

Hi I was wondering if you could make a matchup with nijisanji if possible?

Both sfw and nsfw

Gender: gender-fluid (biologically female)

Pronom: she/him

Sexuality: pansexuel

Appearance: 5’7 (170cm), dirty blonde hair (sometimes dyed) medium length, tan skin with a bunch of beauty spot and two birth mark (one on my left leg close to my inner thigh and the other one pretty big on my arm), I am pretty slim, I have glasses, brown/black eyes and dimple

Personality: im very shy and quiet but when I’m with people I’m comfortable with I am a bit crazy, sarcastic and a bit of a prankster but overall I’m caring, kind, smart, a hopeless romantic and patient

Zodiac sign: cancer

MBTI type: INFP

Likes: I love video games, drawing, music, reading, watching anime, plushie, horror stories, writing poem, sleep and cooking

Dislike: Loud noise/heated arguments (they scare me), not be able to fight back, pushy people, entitled people/brat, banana, frog, worms

Hobbies: play video game (of any type), drawing, listening to music, reading, singing and watch anime

Secret: I have ADHD and dyslexia (possibly autistic but I don’t have a diagnostic for that one) and I’m very good with kid/baby and they all love me (to the point they follow me like little ducklings) and I do want kid in the far futur

Misc: my native language is French but I’m more comfortable with English

Sorry if it was long or if there’s any grammatical errors I hope you have a good day and I hope it would be my Oshi that I get.

Thank you very much!

i pair you with…

Elira Pendora!

hear me out…

• UGH I LOVE HER.

• niji girls will playfully argue w you about who loves her more

• pogmu and you have a full rivalry

• luca probably ends up having a dating show w/ elira as the bachelorette and its just u and pogmu fighting for ewiwa’s heart

• oh my god i love ewiwa

• non parasocial

• she’ll probably be in call w/ you while you stream Melatonin and will end up falling asleep<3

• will hit you w random ass deez nuts joke

• or will sheesh at you if you tell her a pickup line

• shes such a zoomer ong

• pls tease her ab being a zoomer 🙏🙏

• if you think shes a zoomer she will force you to meet her brother and endure that pain

• she loves words of affirmation!!! giving and receiving!!!

• pls pls pls reaffirm her shes so insecure omg

• when holding ur hand she’ll do the thumb stroke thingy <33

RUNNERS UP: Luca Kaneshiro, Pomu Rainpuff

#luca kaneshiro #ike eveland #luxiem #luxiem x reader #shu yamino #mysta rias #vox akuma #nijisanji en

[thotsforvillainrights]

hi!! How are u? I hope you doing fine 🥰🥰

I would like to ask for match up pls.

I'm female, heterosexual, I'm either ISFJ/INFP (kinda feels like both 🤷‍♀), an artist, I have pretty intimidating face and I kind of proud of it but at the same time I'm insecure bc no one want to be friends with me 😭😭 but I find myself as introverted, weird, and shy, people didn't know I'm that kind of person since I have rbf 🗿but I'm loud with friends I'm closed with

I have long black haired, brown eyes, fair skin, rbf, my height is 165cm and wearing glasses

Hobby, watch movies, reading books, drawing, listens to music, daydreaming 24h and shopping

I likes anime, manga, novel, fashion, watch romance and horror movies, cooking, dark academia theme and style, animals, love and always wearing black mask (it sad bc covid is almost over ���) coffee and anything not to sweet

I don't really like sweets I mean I like eat something not to sweet like pudding, coffee cake, any pastries, etc.. I hate pastel colors and anything that cute except cute animals (it just cringe for me I'm sorry), do any works late at night, anyone that annoyed me (I pretty much have anger issues with this one 😀), someone I'm use to know with ignore me, someone with adhd (I'm not hate I know some people had it so I'm said I distance myself), I hate when people makes me wash the dishes, that the only thing I know about myself 🤷‍♀

Positive about me is I'm very supportive, kindhearted, polite, hardworking, independent, forgiving with someone I love, ambitious, curiosity, I'm literally mom of the friends group 😭, concern pretty important for me, patience (depends on my mood)

Negative things about me, I have anger issues (only for those who annoyed/make me angry I'm not 24/7 angry sometimes I try to be more patience), careless, rebellious, stubborn and aggressive

About the aggressive part I love to take hand to hand combat bcuz I took martial art class and I'm good using any dangerous weapon bcuz I love to takes any risk and challenge

From what I tell u from the beginning I have problem to control my emotions, naturally I'm lil shy, emotionless and introverted but when I lost control I hurt people feeling where at the end I feel regret and I embarrass to apologize until now

I'm pretty good when it comes to fashion sense, I like to wear casual dress especially color black and red (I'm not emo and muscular btw) I wear what I feels like it good and makes me confident with my rbf (depends on what the occasion/season) and I wear makeup especially doing ombre lips 😍

I don't show love through words but more to act of service, quality times and physical touch. Too bad I am quite inexperienced when it comes to love but doesn't mean I don't know how to show appreciation

Bonus, I'm not afraid of anything even insects like cockroaches, I do afraid of something but my useless brain didn't tell me what it is rn 🙄👎. I made my own career. I'm very good when it comes to cooking but bad at cleaning.. Like very bad..

Well that the only thing I know about me. and sorry about bad English I hope u understand what I tryna to says and thank you so much 😇🥰 sorry if I didn't notice the typos 😃

(Okie Dokie!!!)

Match-Up #23

-I match you with Yu Hojo-

headcanon|scenario|imagine|match-up

-Upon first glance he'd thought you were tough as nails and that you didn't like him or the others in the least bit. Why Overhaul would let a woman join the yakuza was beyond him. However, Hojo never questioned the boss considering he'd placed his full trust in him. Maybe you were like him and the others here? Discarded and stomped on by society, trash saved by the leader himself and given another chance at life here with the Hassaikai. Or perhaps he just needed a maid right? A pretty face like yours would do well around here as the maid. The man let his thoughts run wild for at least 2 full days after he found out you were being placed in his team. Little by little you began to open up and confuse Hojo more and more. Just earlier you were sitting there as a menacing aura rolled off of you. Then here you were about 20 minutes later taking care of Tabe and speaking sweetly to him after he'd gotten a paper cut somehow. So which is it? Were you vicious or kind??? Hojo continued on with his work and watched you as the days passed. You started talking more and more with the other two and soon he'd found you were nothing like the facial expression that betrayed you so many times. You were a delightful person to be around compared to him and the rest of the brutes here. He secretly began to beat himself up when he watched you interact with the others. He wanted to be close to you as well, loudly joking about whatever dumb topic was on your mind at the moment but he kept his distance from you and just kept quiet. If it actually hadn't been for Setsuno intervening then Hojo would've never ended up as your partner to begin with. "Look man I'm not trying to get on your ass or play cupid, but I think if you really like the girl you shouldn't hesitate on it. She's become pretty popular around here lately and it's only a matter of time before some snub asks her out. You don't wanna live your life in regret man. You know I could give a shit less about something as fictional as love but I just can't stand the thought of having to deal with you moping around here any longer."

"Moping…have I been moping?" Setsuno sucks air in through his teeth and stares anywhere but at Hojo. "Yeah man. Moping."

-Hojo bites back on the nervousness that crept up on him the day he finally asked you on a date. You happily accepted it because let's face it: Hojo was pretty attractive and free food was involved as well. I'd say the date went fairly well. He asked a lot of questions about you but didn't really air himself out there as much for you. It was likely because he was actually a little shy for the first time in his life. He was a gentleman the entire time and it was clear to see that chivalry wasn't dead when it came to him. The next date that came around you actually ended up asking him out this time and he happily took you up on the offer. This time he incorporated some of the things he learned about you from the first date. He gifts you some anime merch (you should've seen how awkward he looked buying it lol), he offers his car stereo for your full control so you can play music you like, he ever takes you out shopping later…his treat! The third date was an indoor one. You curl up on the couch and show him a few of your favorite horror and romance movies while he snickers at the cheesiness in all of it. He comes up with the idea halfway through to have a drawing date where you both follow a tutorial and show each other the results. His drawing was awful lol. If you've got time left in the date you two cook together (maybe teach him a little something) and you even get to show him some of your favorite books. To be romantic, this man will read them to you if you wanted him to.

-A few more dates and you've basically grown comfortable with each other. It's okay for you to show yourself around him. You can daydream all you want, geek over fashion or cute animals even, or simply infodump everything you know about dark academia to him. He accepts it all with a smile and a little twinkle of interest in his eye. In return you have to take him as he is. He's protective, sometimes stern when he lectures you, but so gentle to you as if you're the most fragile thing he's ever touched. He loves you so much. He does little things here and there to express it rather than saying it as often to you. He'll steal your glasses right off your face and clean smudges off of them with his shirt (even if he's wearing an expensive shirt). He'll try to help you calm yourself if your anger gets out of control. Even if you end up lashing out on him, he's still there no matter what because he knows it's just your emotions making you feel like that. This man will even let you spar with him. He learns the hard way about why Overhaul let you into the Shie Hassaikai after he sees the damage you can do in a fight.

-He's not too much of a needy man so however you show your love to him, he'll take it and cherish it no matter what.

-The man admires your fashion sense and overall style you display. He'll admit to your face that he loves your eyes and your hair most of all. Honestly he's secretly given you a stupid nickname behind your back, his little doe since you remind him of that animal. He's not ever going to tell you this since he's worried you'll hate it lol.

-What you lack in one department, he makes up for in another. So even if you're bad at cleaning, he'll take over and cover that part for you. When you're upset, he'll try to remain calm for you to level things out. He really is a good person to be in a relationship with. He's knows you like the back of his hand after about a year of dating of each other!

#match up

[b1mbodoll]

gabi oh my god im so sorry about these rude anons 🥺 ur literally the sweetest and most precious person on this app and for people to call you "childish" and "weird" is crazy knowing how much you care about your anons and for some of them to take advantage of talking shit on anon is crazy.

they're points are trash, they dont have one valid reason to hate on you. they're just miserable and they shouldnt be on your profile in the first place if all they're going to do is spread negativity!!! all you do is spread positivity on your account. you literally are one of the most appreciative, kind, and heartwarming people on this app. you create a safe place for everyone who follows you and others too!!!

im so glad we're mooties n im so sorry that people are being so bitter to you baby :( you are literally so nice and not to mention such a good writer?? you make everything so detailed n interesting, you're amazing at what you do. if they dont like what you write, they literally dont have to read it..? its not that hard to not be a fucking bitch, honestly. some people are just cunts n need to realize the whole world doesnt revolve around them n they're big ass head </3

you dont deserve the hate you're receiving and i hope people will realize that just because they're miserable doesnt mean they need to be such bitch and talk shit on anon. like are you that much of a pussy you cant even send a message off anon on an APP? a PHONE. they act as if you can jump through the screen and attack them or some shit like people as such pussies its so funny to me 😭

you're literally just a silly little girl gabi, im so sorry. i promise you can always talk to me if you want or need to!! yk my dms are always open my love, take care :( <3

— lei 🫐 (sorry for the long msg bb!!)

lei my baby <3 i held onto this for a lil bc im so overwhelmed by how sweet you are :( my little ray of sunshine <3 i wish i could explain how much u and ur kind words mean to me :( but pls know i will forever hold this and every other message u have sent me, near and dear to my heart!!!!

ur so right !!!! i find it so dumb that people come onto my blog to spread negativity and hateful messages 😠 like how awful do you have to be to go around bothering people with a reason >:(

thank you so so so much for all the sweet compliments T_T im so emotional ur srsly too lovely <3 and i’m extremely happy you ‘nd others view my blog as a safe place !!! i always want people to feel welcome and cared for so i do my best to offer that ♡

i’m also glad we are not only mutuals but friends as well! we havent spoken for long but u already mean so much to me n i hope we are friends for a long time, baby <3 n thank u for the compliments abt my writing T_T its hard not to doubt myself and my writing but it gets a lil easier to stop when sweeties like u send such heartwarming messages like this 💌💌 mwah

it really isnt hard to be nice!!!!! or jusy block someone you dont like!!! i dont understand why its hard for them to get that through their thick skulls -_-

the use of anon when sending hate rllllly gets under my skin -_- like why are you afraid to own up to your mean and awful messages!!!!! why are you afraid to show me ur blog??? bc i can finally blog you if you do??? agh i will nvr understand meanies -_-

i am just a silly lil girl ur so right, my baby!!!!! i will keep this in mind ‘nd i hope u know ‘m always here for u as well! im here for whatever u need or to listen to whatever u wna talk abt, i promise <3 and pls dont apologize for sendin long msgs 😠😠 i truly appreciate it so much n it means the world to me that ur takin time out of ur day to be such a sweetheart to lil ol me ☹️ mwah mwah mwah i adore u

#♡.signed. sealed. delivered. #♡.sweetheart: 🫐

[3terna15unshin3]

Then Because She Goes

Beautiful, please don’t cry, I love you

★ Chapter 3 of 15, 5727 words

★ Matty Healy x Original Female Character

★ warnings: alcohol consumption

&lt;< 2

7 September, 2018

trumanblack: Agreed but also why does it control my entire life

trumanblack: I liked it tbh the simplicity of the writing was very charming and I liked its views on adhering to social pressure and blah blah blah

trumanblack: But towards the end Keiko drove me up the wall honestly she started getting sooo unlikeable and I was like Im running out of empathy

este.manansala: Omg especially in LA. That place is a fever dream

este.manansala: I’m glad u liked it at least a little bit !!!

este.manansala: That’s interesting tho bc I am a firm believer that a main character doesn’t need to be likeable to be a good character

trumanblack: No fr that’s why when I’m here I feel like I have to actively resist the gravity of every single LA resident turning me into the same caricature of a human that they all are

trumanblack: Hmmm I guess

trumanblack: But sometimes I feel like reading is inherently like a self-inserting practice even in third person perspectives so I can’t help but disconnect when I don’t fuck with the main girl u know

este.manansala: Yeah no I get it

este. manansala: I feel like a lot of female characters are deemed unlikeable for the same reasons male ones are sympathised with

Este pressed ‘send’ on the message as she thought back to her conversation earlier, with the customer looking for classics. She definitely used Matty's point about likeable characters to sell Emma, and completely understood where he was coming from; but she wanted to give him a hard time. She felt inclined to be playful and make him laugh, for some reason.

trumanblack: Ok damn

trumanblack: You’re right

este.manansala: I know :)

trumanblack: I’m part of the problem arent I

este.manansala: Probably but I’ll let you off the hook x

este.manansala: Are u gonna give me a book of essays to read now??

trumanblack: Wait I actually will

trumanblack: I read this collection called You Are Here: Art After the Internet by Omar Kholeif bc I saw someone on the train reading it and it was so good

trumanblack: I named the new album after one of the essays in it lolll

este.manansala: It seems very meta to be telling me to read that over instagram dms

este.manansala: I’ll try and pick it up tho!

este.manansala: Busy in LA?

trumanblack: It is meta that’s why you should read it

trumanblack: And yeah we need to have the final masters submitted for in 2 days so it’s go time

trumanblack: Just living in the studio pretty much

este.manansala: What are u doing messaging me in the middle of the day then like get back to it

trumanblack: Fuck off I’m eating lunch rn

trumanblack: What were you doing not responding to my message for weeks then????

este.manansala: … soz

este.manansala: Honestly never check my dms so i didn’t see it

este.manansala: Until I went to message you about Love It If We Made It bc it’s my favourite song of the year so far

este.manansala: Like actually

trumanblack: Este don’t say that if you don’t mean it :(

este.manansala: I’m being serious

este.manansala: I fully wrote paragraph about how much I like it and was about to send it your way and then I saw u messaged me first

trumanblack: That means so much. Really

trumanblack: Thank you x

trumanblack: But also u can’t just admit that and then not show me the paragraph. Like send it over pls

este.manansala: Yeah no way lol

este.manansala: Must keep the mystery alive somehow

Este finally looked away, for now. Her lower back was sore from sitting on their hard wooden chairs for a little too long, so she decided that it was a good time to get ready for bed. But, before she could, a buzz of excitement scraped goosebumps into her skin as Cate’s keys jangled in the door, eager to fill her in.

“Hey!” screamed Cate from the hallway, still out of sight from Este. The project for her biggest client of the year had just begun, so her hours became a bit unpredictable and she often arrived home late. 

They caught each other up on how their days went, Este glad to hear that work was going well and Cate being particularly excited that Matty had reached out and taken a liking to her. 

“It really isn’t anything crazy, we’re just talking about books and stuff,” Este tried, although a small flutter in her heart knew she was lying and that she ultimately was excited to even reveal it to Cate. “He’s just a cool guy. Really smart and friendly.”

Cate’s eyebrows raised, unconvinced. She dropped her coat into her room before reentering the main area to start the kettle. “Is he just a ‘cool’ guy or is he a ‘hot tumblr singer in a band who slid into your DMs’ guy?” 

Este cringed at her wording and threw the mushroom sitting on her plate from dinner at Cate playfully. She dodged it in disgust. 

“Just a guy, Cate. And he didn’t ‘slide into my DMs’, I just gave him a book recommendation and he told me what he thought of it,” Este argued. 

“Whatever you say, babe,” she entertained. “It is kind of hot that he reads, though.” 

They laughed as Este agreed, and they both headed off to bed.

✴ 18 November, 2018

To Este’s surprise, she and Matty continued to casually chat. It was mainly book talk; their personal lives only coming up occasionally. Neither of them expected responses to be consistent, especially with the busy pre-album schedule of Matty, who was now back in London. His work was also a reason why they hadn’t gotten through many books, him taking much longer to pick up anything Este shared, but the conversations were thoughtful and worth coming back to.

It was a struggle to find any titles Matty mentioned because of how obscure they were. Can this guy get any more pretentious? Este thought as she furiously searched for a copy of You Are Here: Art After the Internet online when they first messaged each other. Still, over a month later, she couldn’t track one down—not even on eBay. Matty thought he’d never hear the end of her complaints.

The chill November breeze came through Greenhouse quite frequently during Este’s Sunday shift. A mild autumn day with crunchy leaves scraping against the pavement seemed to always be busy for the book shop. The weather and aesthetic was perfect for the activity, leaving the store with a more frequent customer count while Este was busy dealing with an angry woman over the phone (the post lost the copy of Sapiens they’d ordered for her). It ate up all of her energy and left her on edge for the rest of her shift. So, when she felt a buzz coming from her phone and saw what the notification read, panic ran through her veins.

[este.manansala] trumanblack: Are u working today

Este’s eyes widened as she registered what the message most likely meant. There was no context, no ‘hello’ to preface, no warning—but in her gut, she knew. Matty is in town.

The frazzled state she was in only got worse as her mind thought of every awkward experience she’d ever lived and convinced her that seeing him again would out do them all. Using the term ‘self-destructive’ to describe her mindset was an understatement. Este couldn’t figure out what made her so anxious about facing Matty.

Thinking deeper about it, as she couldn’t distract herself this time around (despite the handful of customers she’d checked out since seeing his message), Este realised the nerves’ origin. He wasn’t just Matty like he was last time stepping foot in the shop—he was Matty Healy. 

She tried not to let that change things, but it did. It brought on a certain reluctivity within Este’s messages. Never completely committing to being 100% herself when speaking to him—she defaulted to her ‘casual cool girl’ persona that she usually stored in her pocket to pull out in times of need. 

She was scared that it would reach a point where it meant more to her than it did him. His face was on billboards that greeted Este on her way into work every day. The singles leading up to his album were at the top of the UK charts. Este couldn’t let their collection of DMs and developing friendship be an exciting thing in her life when it was, without a doubt, miniscule in his. 

The longer she spiralled about it, the longer Este put off replying to his message, only getting to it a couple of hours before she had to close the shop. 

este.manansala: Yea what’s up

She couldn’t think of anything else to say, so the three word response would have to do. Maybe it’s too late for him to stop by, she secretly hoped, loosening up her worries and busying herself with work once more.

After Este witnessed multiple customers sneeze near their poetry bay, a Swiffer duster insert found itself in her hand as she wiped away the thin layer of grey gunk atop the shelf. She hummed to herself as she dusted, not even realising that the melody she conjured up was the tune to one of Matty’s songs.

It was dark now, thirty minutes until close, and nobody had come in for around an hour. The crazy day was thankfully coming to a close; Este’s anxieties subsided after assuming that what she had endured would be it for the night. But, she assumed too soon. 

The small, new wind chime Sam hung from the door just a few days prior made its twinkly exclamation. 

“It’s not too late to come in, is it?”

Este turned to see Matty. It was actually him. 

She smiled and wormed her way around the maze of bookshelves between them. “For you, yeah. Get out.” 

Their eyes finally found each other and Matty spread his arms out, offering a hug. Este accepted and wrapped her own around him, just above his shoulders, as she felt his drop to her waist respectfully. He isn’t very tall, thought Este. And he smells good. 

“Ha ha, very funny,” Matty sarcastically responded. “How’ve you been?”

They stood face to face in the open area by the front of the store.

“Good.” She nodded. “Same old, same old, really. I don’t have a massive album to release in two weeks or anything.”

He laughed quietly, taking off into the shelves. His steps were slow and calculated to sustain his attention to their conversation but his eyes scanned the book titles. “I guess that’s what I’ve got in the works,” he admitted. “It doesn’t feel like it’s that soon, though. I don’t think I’ve accepted the fact that it’ll just be out for people to hear,” he explained, pausing his movements for a second to pull a book off the bay and study the back cover. 

“That one’s shitty. Read it last year.” 

Matty raised his eyebrows at Este and placed the book where it belonged, in defeat. The trench coat she first saw him in was hanging off his body lazily. The tie-belt skipped one of the loops behind his back, and one side of it dragged drastically lower than the other along the floor. The coat’s square pockets were full and sagging. 

Este followed his path as they continued through the shop, Matty repeatedly grabbing books to beg her blunt opinions. Every one he chose so far resulted in it returning to its place on the shelf within seconds of escaping. She knew the place like the back of her hand. 

“What are you doing in Manchester, anyway?” she wondered. 

Matty stopped and turned to her, flipping through another novel, this time satisfied with what he found. Shrugging casually, he responded, “Visiting a mate for his birthday, dinner and drinks at Head of Steam. Thought it would be more fun but it was sort of a drag, to be honest,” he complained. “Too much dinner and not enough drinks.”

“I was just about to ask, what sort of dinner and drinks end before,” she clicked open her phone to check the time. “…7:36pm.” 

They both laughed and Matty shook his head. “Yup, that just about describes how exciting the event was.”

The book in his hands happened to be another Este had read, this time one she was fond of. “You should read that one,” she commented. “It’s new. Not sure how we managed to stock a used one already. I think you’d really like it.”

Matty continued flipping through it, stopping a couple of times to focus on certain pages, without saying anything. Suddenly, he sank down to the floor and sat comfortably, leaning his back against the shelf behind him. His legs were outstretched in front of him, straight, his feet almost touching the shelf opposite because of the cramped nature of the shop.

“Care to join me?”

He patted the patch of carpet next to him, and Este obliged. She sat on the floor next to his feet, laying her legs out like his were, and faced him as he studied the novel. Her phone lit up with the reminder she always set when working, making her aware that it was five short minutes until close. Usually, Este would take this time to ensure the shop was tidy for Sam to be greeted with the next morning, close up the register and deal with the float inside it. But, none of that crossed her mind with Matty sitting opposite her.

“On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous,” Matty read. “What an interesting title.”

Este couldn’t stand that he was opening the novel to random pages and reading content without the important context, so she jokingly reached forward, laying her hands beneath his and forcing the book shut for him.

“You know books are meant to be read from the beginning, Matty.” She left them there for a second before pulling them away, Matty following her instructions and setting the book down in his lap. 

“I always skip to random parts in books before I read them. Lets me know what I’ll be getting into,” he defended.

“That’s blasphemous to me. Especially with that book, because Vuong, the author, is a poet as well. Every sentence feels meaningfully placed,” she rambled. 

“Wouldn’t that also mean that they stand well on their own? If every line is like poetry?”

“I guess, but that’s not the point. The context holds the weight of his words. When I read it, at least, I’d come across something that felt really powerful. And I’d just think, wow. That’s the point he was leading up to. That was the whole purpose of the pages of words beforehand. But then, I would read the following line, and suddenly that became the purpose. And it just never stopped metamorphosing, like he carried me through the book in the same way he made the revelations himself.”

He looked at her with fondness as she chewed on the inside of her cheek. Matty could see the passion on her face and smiled in response. “You sold me. If you talk about all books like that, I understand why you sell them for a living,” he complimented. 

Este leaned forward and pretended to bow. “My work here is done,” she joked. Her job being brought up prompted her to check the time again, seeing 8:02PM looking back at her from the screen. “Shit, it actually is. I have to close the shop.”

“Oh, sorry—”

“Don’t worry. I stay late all the time, just have to lock the door and flip the sign,” Este started, without thinking, as she got up from her spot on the floor to walk to the front. “That’s if you want to stay. You don’t have to, if you have somewhere to be, or if its weird to be locked in a bookshop on a Sunday night or something,”

“I’d love to stay.”

✴

She only kept two lamps on and then sat back down on the floor, not wanting Greenhouse to look too welcoming and inspire people to try and come in. The door was bolted shut, and On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous hadn’t left Matty’s grasp. Este wasn’t sure why she hadn’t offered him to sit at the table in the back room, but something felt natural about wedging themselves between the shelves. The carpeted floor was comfortable. 

“I’m actually going to buy this from you, buy the way,” he clarified. His right foot was crossed over his left and slightly grazed Este’s left arm that fell next to her body. 

“I’m not taking any money from you, Matty.”

“So I’ll just make you keep the shop open late and then steal an item from you?” he protested. 

“I borrow books all the time, Sam doesn’t care. I’ll just tell him I let a friend borrow it.” She was being serious.

Matty accepted her offer, and thought about the item he brought in his pocket, debating on whether it was appropriate to even bring it out. It was oddly personal and he found himself doubting his idea, even though he didn’t think twice about it when leaving his flat earlier that morning. 

“I can return the favour, then.” He pulled out his copy of You Are Here: Art After The Internet. The pages were yellowed and there were blue tabs messily sticking out of the side of it. Este realised what it was, shocked to learn that Matty was lending her his copy. “So you can stop complaining about not being able to find one.” He took Este’s hands that were resting in her lap, unravelled them to put the book in, and closed them back up to force her to hold it. 

They made eye contact for a couple of seconds. Matty had never noticed how dark and straight her eyelashes were. They framed her eyes well.

“For me?”

Matty nodded.

Este fanned through the pages with her thumb, seeing every page for a split second. She noticed pen marks accompanying the printed text and wondered what each blue tab stood for. 

“I see you’re the annotating type.”

“It’s cathartic,” he replied shortly. “Please don’t judge what I wrote, though. If you read anything stupid, just assume I was high, or something.”

To her, it felt like he was lending her his diary. She couldn’t imagine letting someone into the thoughts she had while reading a book, let alone the impulsive and quickly crafted ones worthy enough to be scribbled into the margins. It was an intimate act. 

“This is really sweet of you,” she vocalised. “Now I feel like I owe you my copy of On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous instead of letting you borrow the shop’s.”

He raised his eyebrows in interest. “So you’re an annotator too?”

Este nodded and smiled. “I marked it up quite a bit, actually. It’s not here, though. It’s back at my flat.”

“Well, do you live far?”

✴

She rushed through her closing duties as Matty browsed some more. Her arms slipped into her fleece-lined denim jacket and her mind raced, trying to fathom the fact that he was about to be in her car (and later, her flat). As much as things had been easy and flowing naturally until now, the dilemma she considered earlier in the day still haunted her. 

He was panicking almost as equally as Este. Suggesting they should go back to hers was a chaotically forward thing to do, and Matty instantly feared it would come off wrong. They both weren’t sure why they agreed, but did anyway. It felt wrong to end the night there.

Eventually, they were walking down the street together to get to her black Honda Accord that had gone far too long without a wash. Their conversation remained sweet and light, finally gracing the basics of getting to know each other. 

“I went to school in Wilmslow, though. That's where I met the guys and when we formed the band,” he explained. 

“This whole time I thought you grew up in the city.” She acted shocked. “You call Manchester your hometown. Liar.” 

Este clicked the button on her car key and the headlights on her car flashed. Matty went around to the driver’s side to open her door for her, flashing her a smile. She smiled back. Chivalrous, she thought. 

“I moved a couple times. I don’t know what my hometown is, really, I give a different answer every time—but it feels like home here. I just say I’m from the North of England. Wilmslow, Cheshire, Macclesfield, Manchester. Whatever,” Matty said, securing his seat belt and tucking the strap underneath his arm. “You grew up here, yeah?”

Her finger tucked an unruly strand of hair behind her ear as she carefully pulled into the road, before responding. “After I moved, yeah. On my seventh birthday I spent the whole day on a flight over to London from the Philippines. But I only lived in London for a couple of months before me and my mum and dad moved to Manchester.”

They drove in the dark, Matty asking her more questions about life in the Philippines and what it was like to move over. Este brought up her grandmother and how she and her husband stayed in London after finding a nursing job she didn't want to say no to. “My nan was my best friend growing up, so that was probably the only thing I didn’t like about Manchester when I came over. That she didn’t come along.”

Matty shoved his cold hands further into his pockets. “Speaking of your nan, actually,” he started. “On the plane to LA in August I was so bored out of my mind that I started organising the files on my computer. Then I found this picture.” He opened his phone, clicking on his iCloud files and scrolling through to find the photo.

Este interrupted before he could. “You can’t just say ‘Speaking of your nan…’ and then furiously search through your phone without explaining further!” she impatiently exclaimed, both of them erupting into laughter after realising how creepy it seemed.

“I swear, it’s not weird! Let me find what I’m looking for and then you’ll get it,” he defended.

It finally came up, and Matty held up his screen to show her. Este was in the middle of turning down her street, so it took a couple of seconds before she could break her attention to the road, but then eventually she studied the relic.

“Oh my god! That’s Lola!”

She was shocked. They both found it hilarious that Florencia and Matty had met before, a picture proving it. 

“She was the best, honestly. Made the hospital way less of a horrifying place to be,” he gushed. “You should tell her, next time you see her. If she remembers me. Then maybe she can replace that horrid memory of me thinking her name was Lola with the fact that she nursed me back to health after getting my gallbladder removed.”

“She remembers you, for sure. I think she likes you more than I do, to be quite honest, so she’ll be excited to hear that you two go further back,” she joked. 

Matty threw her an offended ‘Hey!’ in response.

They pulled into her flat’s parking spaces and Este took note of Cate’s car being absent from the spot beside her’s. A small wave of relief hit. No awkward flatmate introductions. A silence fell over them as they exited her car into the evening chill. Este didn’t have to ask if he wanted to follow her up, since he began doing so anyway. It was only 8:30, but time ticked slowly. 

After getting through a couple of locked doors in the lobby, they comfortably entered the elevator, and Este pressed on the button with the 4 on it. The two stood next to each other and turned to face the doors, their shoulders brushing innocently. 

“You know, we’re painfully pretentious for coming all the way here just so I could read your specific copy of that book. I literally already had one in my hands,” Matty pointed out.

A ding rang in the air as they passed the first floor. 

“I know.” Este smiled. “I think that’s just who we are, though. You, a little more than me, but still.”

Another ding. Second floor.

“"I think we’re equally pretentious, but—” said Matty, but she cut him off by silently holding up the copy of You Are Here in her hands, proving her point. He flipped her off. 

The forth ding was heard before the doors opened back up, Este exiting and letting Matty follow her. She was nervous for him to see her and Cate’s relatively small flat, but was glad that at least they kept it tidy; and, with time, found an appropriate position for the couch. They hadn’t said anything since reaching her floor, but not in a bad way. 

She swung the door open, welcoming Matty inside. Walking past the kitchen and into the living area, he studied every detail of the space. He liked the small ceramic rabbits that were scattered through their very full plant stand, with greenery sticking out in every direction, and how each of them had a different expression. The prints hanging on the walls felt aged and added character to their maximally styled room. Matty assumed each piece had its own story. 

Este hesitantly asked the question that had been tickling at her tongue the entire walk up to the flat as she removed her jacket and threw it onto the dining room table. 

“Have time to stick around for a brew?”

He was hoping she’d ask him to stay. “Course,” agreed Matty. “You know, this is exactly what I expected your place to look like.” He copied her and removed his coat, setting it down on the couch and then taking a seat next to it. 

She made her way back to the kitchen to start the kettle. “Really? Why?”

“Dunno. Really artsy and charming with tons of little trinkets. Endless amounts of things to look at—books and plants, just like the shop.” 

Which mugs should I use? Este thought, opening the cupboard. Which mug of mine is the coolest? Has an interesting backstory? She shook her head to herself, embarrassed to be internally worrying about choosing a mug. 

“Thank you. I think I’m just a hoarder, so the minute I find something cool I just stick it on a shelf either out here or in my room and then I’m bonded to it for life. My flatmate, Cate, is the same way so it’s twice as bad.”

Even after realising how stupid it was to care about what mug to give Matty, she still tried to pick her coolest one. It was a plain white ceramic mug that was sculpted to look like a slightly crumpled red Solo cup but with a handle. Este thought Matty would either love it or hate it, and wanted to find out which it would be; as if the answer would be revealing of his spirit, or something.

“Milk or sugar?” she asked, looking up to make eye contact with him for the first time in a couple of minutes. 

Matty was already gazing at her, watching her potter around the kitchen. A blush spread over Este's cheeks after she noticed. “Just a dash of milk, please,” he told her, standing up to walk over to their kitchen island and lean against it. “I’m kind of the opposite of a hoarder. I own like three things in total.”

The kettle started whistling, signalling her to pick it up and pour their cups. “That doesn’t at all surprise me, Matty,” Este claimed while opening up the fridge to grab the milk. In it, she saw the case of Heineken she and Cate had bought last week. She cringed. “I’m also just now realising that I have beer in the fridge and it was really lame of me to offer you tea.”

Pouring the milk anyway, Este pushed Matty’s cup towards him. 

He muttered a quick ‘thanks’ before taking a careful sip. “I mean, in a mug like this,” he pointed playfully at the eccentric Solo cup pottery. “Totally not lame.”

Este could hear the sarcasm in his voice, so she reached up and shoved his shoulder with her palm. “Hey, that’s like my best thrift find of all time. It’s edgy. The perfect combination of classic and modern. Practical, too.”

Their conversation continued for another half-hour as their teas dwindled in both fullness and temperature. He eventually asked for a tour of the flat, so Este showed him around, even letting him take a peek into her bedroom and its many more trinkets. In it, she picked her copy of On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous off her shelf and handed it to him. Matty accepted it, while continuing to throw compliments her way, commenting on the oozing personality of all of her belongings.

Looping back around after seeing the whole flat, the couch dipped as both of them took a seat, now with beers in hand.

“So, do you invite customers back to your flat very often?”

Este was slightly embarrassed by the nature of the question, but tried to play it off and replied, “Only the ones that are famous musicians.”

Matty took a swig of beer and set it onto the coffee table with a coaster beneath it. “Oh, I see. So this is a meet and greet.” They both laughed and silence fell upon them again. “I’m actually really nervous. For the album, I mean,” he admitted. 

She looked over to him, her expression softening. “Really?”

“Yeah, it’s just a bit scary. You know, people have been liking the songs so far, but the single we put out last month sort of has blown up my whole junkie, rehab, drug thing. So I feel a lot of pressure to say the right thing.”

“I mean, I feel like that just gives people a reason to connect to the album even more. Your art still holds its purpose—that emotional release.” 

Matty smiled thankfully. “Thank you for calling my music ‘my art’. That really withholds this whole pretentious thing we've got going on," he said with a chuckle. “And seriously, thank you for liking Love It If We Made It. It’s cool to have a cool person like your stuff.”

“I love it. Really do,” she pushed. “And thank you for calling me a cool person.”

“You are.” Matty meant it. 

His eyes trailed from the dimple on her left cheek to the chain dangling from her neck and further to the clothes draped on her body. “Is that necklace you wear a dragonfly? Or is it a butterfly?” 

Este was confused at the randomness of his question but answered anyway. She could tell he was itching to know even the little things about her.

“It’s a dragonfly,” she confirmed, reaching up to fiddle with it and give Matty a closer look. “They remind me of my grandpa. Dragonflies love him. Back in the Philippines, he was a fisherman, so he spent a lot of time out by water. I have hundreds of memories of being with him near the ocean and seeing one land on the rim of his cap or even the tip of his nose.” 

He smiled warmly at the sweet anecdote but left space for her to continue, liking that she responded to his questions with stories, not just answers. 

“There aren’t many out here, though, especially since he lives in London and stays in the city. So I wear one around my neck instead,” Este explained. She studied his face as she sipped her beer. Matty was listening. It felt like he was looking through her, too.

After talking for as long as their minds took them, through topics big and small, light and dark, Matty decided he better make his way. “Shit, it’s 12:30. Might want to catch an Uber.” 

“Where are you staying? I could drive,” Este offered. 

He opened his phone to open the app and see the rides available, denying her kind gesture. A few clicks later, a car was on its way. “Oh please, don’t worry. It’s late. I’m just crashing at my mate’s—the one whose birthday I came in for. Taking the train back to London tomorrow morning for rehearsals,” explained Matty. 

Este handed him his coat as they both stood up and slowly made their way over to the door. The Uber was minutes away, so they didn’t stop before leaving the threshold of her flat and taking the elevator down to the lobby. 

“Rehearsals? Is tour happening that soon?”

“Not until next year. But, we have a show in Kingston the night before the album comes out. Shitting my pants about it, honestly, so we’ve been rehearsing like crazy,” he said as the elevator doors reopened to let them onto the ground floor, continuing to walk towards the main door. “You should come, if you’re free. We always leave room at the side of the stage for friends and family. I’d love for you to hear the new stuff live.” Matty now stood on the pavement, turning to face Este, who stood just inside the doorway. She grinned at his offer, appreciating his generosity. 

“That would be amazing,” she agreed. “Let me know the details and I’d love to be there.”

He nodded at her and held up the book in his hands. “Thanks, for this. And tonight.”

Este likewise thanked him for the novel of essays that now sat on her coffee table upstairs. They shared a casual embrace to say goodbye, with Matty’s hands gracing the small of her back and hers meeting over his neck. She pressed her lips to his cheek, close to his jaw, holding it there briefly before letting go. Matty wished they stayed there a little longer. 

One last ‘good night’ left their mouths as the car pulled up and Matty got in. He shot Este a small wave from behind the tinted car window.

4 >>

#the 1975 #matty healy #matty healy fanfiction #matty healy x oc #the 1975 fanfiction #matty healy fic #Spotify #tbsg

[dvesinthewind]

How Do I Make You Love Me ² | Maddy Perez

part two of a multi-part series, part one here. maddy perez x fem!reader. wc 5.8k

tags/warnings: cassie is a mess, season 2 spoilers, (does not follow plot exactly, as I've had to change things to fit my storyline), underage drinking, irresponsible parenting, mentions of throwing up, abusive relationships, mature language, slow burn, foreshadowing, religious metaphors, drug usage (reader is a stoner lol), angst, internalized homophobia, mentions of violence

a/n: so much kat and reader interaction in this chapter! (hoping she doesn't appear ooc) we're slowly making progress in the series, and thank u sm to those who have been reblogging & leaving nice comments. u r all so sweet. i did say this was a slow burn & i do have a personal life so pls be patient w/me!! also reminder that u are responsible for your media consumption, and euphoria contains many heavy topics. those said topics are incorporated into my fics. with that being said, enjoy!

Before you know it, Maddy's birthday is around the corner, and any unresolved tension from the bowling-alley-confessions must be put aside.

Despite the strange changes Cassie had undergone over the past few weeks, her indifference in terms of throwing Maddy's party in her own home was surprising. Decorations had been set up just a few nights before with lots of back and forth due to Lexi's insistent desire for perfection. You couldn't exactly blame her, and if you had been honest, you also wished for this to be perfect for Maddy as well. Though, it was unclear whether Lexi had been uptight about organization when considering Maddy's happiness, or if she just strived for perfection in general.

And although Cassie hadn't had the best eye for interior design, and left most of the decorations tangled in Lexi's hands, she seemed content with helping. She seemed content when you both hung up the tinsel on the doorways. She even smiled fondly when showing you the photo album she had made for Maddy. But something was off. There was a subtle crack in her voice when she pointed out each photo, examining each memory as if you hadn't been there to experience it. It was almost as if Cassie was somehow mourning the friendship presented in the earlier photos, which you noticed had caused a reaction the most. You were quick to blame it on Cassie's tendency to be overly emotional, and an overwhelming sense of nostalgia, or love for her best friend. Afterwards, it was evident it had to have been something else.

Tucking those thoughts into your back pocket, Kat and Maddy had arrived shortly after Suze had set out a third of her alcohol collection onto the kitchen counter. She freely handed out drinks, advising against telling any parents, and sluggishly raised her glass to audibly connect with each of yours.

You weren't exactly sure when Cassie had gotten her manicured hands on so many drinks, but before you knew it, she was off mumbling something about Nate when lingering around each hallway like a forgotten ghost in an old cemetery. Her makeup had already been smeared down the sides of her face, cheeks bright and rosy from the elevated consumption of alcohol, and it appeared as if her attire had completely restricted her from moving freely. You'd never seen Cassie so uncomfortable in her own skin.

There had been a moment where you pulled her aside by the thin strap of her dress, and into an empty room. Her footsteps found no rhythm, stumbling and tripping up underneath her as her eyes widened with obvious confusion, as if the person who dragged her in there wasn't a close friend. You attempted to advise her that maybe she had had too much to drink, and that she wouldn't want to throw all of it up later on. But she was persistent, and slightly rude, though you were easily able to discard it on behalf of her drunken state. She pushed past you and settled herself onto the wooden stairs, where she remained for quite some time.

Despite this, things within the Howard home hadn't been all that bad. Maddy had been dressed in the birthday gift you had given her just a few days before-- a small black number with baby blue lace trim adorning the hemming just above her breasts, and along the very bottom of the fabric that stopped just a few inches past her hips. It was beautiful on her. Flattering enough to wear to simple events, but also alluring enough to make her stand out. While you hadn't exactly bought her the dress intentionally for her to wear it this very night, you were glad she did. All of the girls had made comments of how pretty Maddy looked, giving sly glances towards you with bright smiles as if they had known all along.

"Wow Maddy, that dress is really cute on you." Kat spoke in awe as her eyes danced around Maddy's petite figure like a butterfly circling a blooming tulip. You have her hand clasped in yours, lifting it up and gesturing for Maddy to give everyone a slow, and dramatic twirl (which naturally, she has no problem doing).

She smiles, thanking Kat and averts her eyes over to you. "I guess my personal designer just has an eye for what I look best in." You don't look at anyone else to see their reaction. Your eyes had solely been on the small dimples formed on either side of Maddy's smiling face. You'd never felt such adoration for anyone else.

So, things weren't totally bad. At least not yet.

Everyone was getting along, an everlasting playlist had been flowing through the entirety of the house, no boyfriends had attempted to start issues via text message, and though it was really odd when you thought it over later on, Suze proudly kept the drinks and her dance moves going. Most importantly, Maddy was happy, and you had been too. Everything had felt like it was exactly where it should have been. Jules and Rue were absent despite receiving an invite, but their lack of presence wasn't observed as anything negative. You weren't exactly sure why your expectations had been so much higher than they were. It had been exactly like the bowling alley situation, where all of you were living in the moment, not concerned about external factors, until something, or someone entirely ruins the mood. That, being the announcement that Nate Jacobs was on his way to the party.

Had it been visible that your heart dropped into the pit of your stomach, you didn't know. You also didn't know that Kat had followed you up the stairs and into the bathroom once she had seen it all happen-- the look on your face turn into absolute disgust, the not-so-subtle eye-roll that took place right before you took off, and the painful glance you gave an oblivious Maddy while she typed away a response on her phone. At least someone had noticed.

It wasn't long before there was a gentle knock caressing the bathroom door, and considering there's more than one bathroom in the house, someone was looking for you.

"Yeah, what's up?" You jumped off of the bathroom countertop, standing awkwardly next to it waiting for whoever to come in.

Kat's head poked out from the other side of the now open door, a shy smile taking over her lips as she asked, "can I come in?"

You nodded, placing yourself back up onto the sink and toying with the hem of your skirt. Over the past few months, you had gotten a lot closer to Kat than you expected. You liked her a lot, and even when her and Maddy got into it, it never affected the way you felt about Kat. She had her own issues, but she was honest, and kind, and an individual just like everyone else. You found peace in her silence.

"I just wanted to see if you were okay." She wasn't shy upon asking, and inched further towards you while unclasping her hands. She leaned her back against the other side of the sink, the two of you nearly side by side. However this conversation turns, at least Kat was the one and not anyone else.

"Yeah, why do you ask?"

Kat gives you a look of pure disbelief, but it drops soon as she realizes it was just an automatic response. You weren't trying to shelter yourself, but perhaps this was much bigger than Kat was anticipating it to be. "I saw your face when Maddy told us that Nate was coming..." his name alone brought a displeased expression to your face, "and then you walked off, so-"

"Did anyone else notice?"

Kat shook her head, her short hair brushing her shoulders with each movement. "I think just me."

A great exhale finds its way from your lungs and into the bathroom air. Your chest expands, only to fall once more in a sort of rhythmic pattern. Kat watches as if you're practicing some sort of breathing exercise, and she's patient as you formulate some sort of response. "I don't wanna ruin Maddy's party."

"What do you mean?"

Your hands fumble with one another, and you begin to examine your cuticles. "I just- I feel like if I give you the answer you really want, that it could go one of two ways."

The girl looks up at you now, eyes softened with friendly concern. You indulged. It was refreshing to not feel pitied. "Sometimes it helps to get things off of our chest."

Laughing, you glanced down at her. "You should consider your own advice." Kat's eyebrows furrowed, and her head finds itself in a subtle tilt as you all but jump to elaborate. Sighing once more, you mutter a two syllable word, big enough to make her eyes pop out wide like you just admitted to committing a felony. Ethan.

"What about him?" You shrug at this, going back to picking at the skin around your grown out gel-manicure. "Wait. What- No! We can talk about Ethan and I after. I came in here to ask about you."

You don't remove your eyes from your nails, because what you're about to admit is far more dangerous aloud than whispered inside of your head. There's an increase to the speed of your heartbeat, and you can feel the tip of your ears grow very hot. "I'm upset that Nate is coming because I've been in love with Maddy for longer than I care to admit." All in one breath, impressive.

You imagine her reaction-- eyes wide and mouth open in shock from the corner of your eye, and you attempt to brace yourself for it. There is absolutely no way you can look her in the eyes after this.

"I know."

Somehow it's your turn to examine the brunette as if she's suddenly grown four new heads and a pair of antlers. You knew it wasn't exactly a secret, but who else knew? You'd never told anyone that you could remember, unless you had muttered it when not entirely sober. Had it really been that obvious?

"You knew?"

Kat nods, and you slowly saw tears begin to brim her waterline.

"Why are you getting emotional?"

A ripple of laughter echoes against the enclosed walls, and Kat sniffles quickly. "Because you literally just came out to me."

"Everyone knows I'm gay..."

She seemingly can't contain her laughter once again, and stumbles to form a response. "No, I-I know that, but you've never exactly come out to me, especially not with how you felt about Maddy."

"No one knows," you admitted, and it slowly became a little easier to do so. "I've never bothered to tell anyone."

"Do you think Maddy knows?" She asked.

You shook your head. "No, probably not. Considering she's all over Nate now."

It's Kat's turn to roll her eyes in response, and there's a great feeling of relief that washes over you. One, because she had been so accepting, and two, because she hated Nate just as much as you did.

"I don't just hate Nate because I like Maddy, I hate Nate because he's horrible to her." You can see her watch you intently from the corner of your eye, you choose to continue, "I don't think I'll ever forget that bruise on her neck. I think about it every now and then, whenever I find myself glancing around that area- or just whenever she needs help with a necklace or something."

"He's horrible to her," she agreed.

"I think the worst part is the fact that I'm absolutely hopeless. I'm not a man, I'm certainly nothing like Nate Jacobs, and I can't do anything to help her." You aren't sure when it happened but your eyes were quick to fill with tears, anxious to stream down the entirety of your face. Kat is quicker, and also almost as broken as you are. She wraps you into an embrace before you can even think, and you buried your face into the crevice of her shoulder. She offers advice, and you listen like it's Sunday worship, like Kat is the preacher and you are a desperate soul that yearns for the key of the pearly gates of heaven. But it isn't the key to heaven you yearn for, but the grace of God to grant you strength in such a situation like this. You're not asking for forgiveness, but begging for an outlet, a way to save Maddy before it's too late to save yourself.

-

You and Kat return back to the party by the time everyone's taking pictures on the staircase. You're pushed onto one of the individual stairs, legs positioned in a way to appear as feminine and polite as possible, while also trying to cover any open slots for the camera to capture a great image of your undergarments underneath your skirt. That would make an interesting addition to a photo album.

Maddy ends up dragging everyone all over the house looking for a place to take pictures, and you all end up in the backyard where small lights had been strung near the hot tub and onto the deck. She makes sure to take individual pics with all of her girl friends and saved you for last, naturally. Most of the time Maddy needed pictures for instagram, you ended up being in most of them. Half of the girl's entire feed was full of captured photos of the two of you sharing some sort of moment in random places-- some even being the school bathroom. To know Maddy, was to understand how much she loved capturing the moment.

As you stood for yet another photo, with Lexi's steady hands and BB encouraging compliments from right beside her, your arm had been snuggly wrapped around Maddy's small waist. This was typical in general, more specifically for any photo, but after your discussion with Kat it had felt different. Wrong even. You were looking at Maddy with starstruck eyes and a proud smile presenting all of your bright teeth, and reflecting on how much you wished it meant something. You presumed Maddy was giving you the same glance, but her bright mind was imagining what it'll be like when Nate arrives and stands however many inches over her, a strong arm wrapped around her waist just like yours had been.

It was an endless cycle, really. You didn't want to be Nate Jacobs for the aesthetics, but for Maddy to want you the way you wanted her. And it had felt so selfish.

You knew by the end of the night, Maddy would send you the approximate four-hundred photos she had taken and you'd stare at how obvious your admiration had been all along. The photos would easily be mistaken for a couple photoshoot and you'd think about it until your brain was exhausted enough from lack of sleep. You'd think back to how Kat already knew, and how many other people practically assumed. You'd wonder if Maddy was asked if you were a couple from time to time, and if she shut it down immediately as if that could never be true. If the thought entirely had felt humorous, out of reach, and if she didn't even bother reflecting on why someone might've asked to begin with.

Because truly, yours and Maddy's friendship was not painted a specific way to make anyone believe it could have been completely platonic. Your feelings were not created a vacuum, and you could not mistake these feelings for sin or selfishness, or that simply the desire you had for her should be shamed upon. Kat had told you it was only natural. It was about time you even attempted realizing that yourself.

You hugged Maddy for a long while after that, feeling it was unlikely you'd get her to yourself once Nate arrives. You certainly weren't fond of sharing, but someone in that room knew how you felt, and that was all that mattered.

-

Cassie opened the door for Nate.

He came in with a small, signature teal Tiffany bag that looked smaller than his phone in comparison to how large his hands were. You shivered again just thinking about it.

What really pissed you off about Nate was how polite he was upfront. He shook Suze's hand, despite the fact she isn't even Maddy's mom, thanked her for having him, and even gave out his pleasantries to everyone in the home. Fucking douchebag. To add to this, he didn't touch a single bottle of alcohol, and regardless of his size, took up barely any space.

But that was nothing compared to what he did next.

You had sat in the middle of Kat and Lexi at the dinner table. Your leg bounced up and down, anxiously, and Lexi had placed a soft hand onto your knee to slow you down. It was impossible when Nate was placing a silver Tiffany necklace around Maddy's neck, the same one he laid his hands on. His massive hands appeared so delicate, as if that gentleness alone was a non-verbal apology. Maddy smiled awkwardly at all of you, feeling small from the endless shower of gifts. Now Maddy was clad in a dress you had bought her, and accessorized with a necklace Nate had just gifted her.

You were not going to make it through this night sober.

And neither was Cassie.

-

If any of you thought Cassie was drunk before, man, were you wrong.

Cassie was absolutely plastered.

No matter how many times any of you advised she tone it down, she snapped and said she was just trying to have a good time. Lexi was the last person to try, knowing she would receive the same if not worse from her older sister, and ended up being right. As soon as Lexi even attempted to speak with her, Cassie had said, Shut the fuck up Lexi! God! Seriously, I'm just trying to have fun and you're up my ass about everything, a little louder than you presumed she tried to.

You exchanged a glance with Lexi, only for her to shrug as if to say I told you so. You couldn't imagine how difficult it must've been to be Cassie's sister. Lexi's entire life had been a reflection of her being her sister's shadow, even though they had been two entirely different people. For Maddy's sake, you were perfectly friendly with Cassie. You knew a lot of things revolving around her personal life just by being affiliated with Maddy-- that you would never speak about to anyone else, even if Cassie wasn't your bestest of friends. Despite this, your calm nature definitely preferred Lexi's mind and soul over Cassie's, and you had wished to be closer to her than you were. Along with the fact you had yet to squeeze any Fezco information out of her since New Years. If you remembered, you'd ask her about it later.

Currently, you sat on the back deck on a chair you'd pulled from the table in the corner. You had no desire of getting your clothes wet, and no matter how much Maddy begged, you weren't borrowing one of Cassie's bikinis.

Nate had acknowledged you since his arrival, just barely as he knew of your feelings towards him, but how could he win back Maddy if he was rude to his girl's best friend? He attempted small talk, you shut it down, and regardless of the visible clench in his fists and furrow to his brow, he hadn't lost his cool. Not yet.

"Does Suze mind if I smoke?" You had asked after a preceded silence. It was evident Mrs. Howard had questionable parenting skills, but you didn't want to assume and be disrespectful to the woman who's allowing you into her home.

"She said no as long as you keep it out of the house," Maddy replied. You weren't asking her specifically, and due to Nate's presence you had resented her just a small bit at the moment. It was crazy how polar you two could be under certain circumstances. You nodded, and pulled out a joint from behind your ear.

You inhaled for a moment, feeling the smoke fill up your lungs before exhaling it away from the group. You contemplated taking a walk somewhere away from the property just to smoke, but you remembered that the smell of weed irked Nate for some reason, something Maddy had told you a long time ago.

And low and behold, the man himself cleared his throat. "Didn't know you smoked, Y/N."

You hummed, the joint hanging from your lips as you inhaled another hit. You made him wait until you had fully exhaled to give him the satisfaction of a reply. "Well, you and I don't spend much time together do we?"

BB choked on her laughter, and Maddy was sending you a glare that was telling you to check yourself. You didn't want to. Not with Nate. You couldn't, not anymore.

"You'll be seeing more of me though." He turned himself around to face you, so no one could see the devious smirk that subtly stretched across his thin lips. What the hell was he talking about?

You didn't give him the satisfaction once again, not even bothering to hide the fact you found it humorous. Internally, you were imagining how mad Maddy would be if you pulled the same shit Fez had, and hit him across the head with one of the empty bottles Cassie had left lying around. "Is that so?" Nate nodded, slow and truthful. What does Maddy see in this guy? Shaking your head, you took a long drag from the wrapped substance, exhaling on a mumbled I fucking hope not, before Cassie's disruption was made known.

You hoped he hadn't heard you. Or maybe you did, you were already hazy from the drugs.

Cassie walked up onto the deck, stumbled more like, wrapped in birthday balloons that she tossed off to the side before tossing herself into the hot tub. She landed right on top of Nate, and you watched Kat furrow her eyebrows at you.

"Happy birthday," she smiles, and situates herself uncomfortably onto the seated bench. Maddy is gracious but it's obvious she's embarrassed on behalf of Cassie's drunken behavior.

It had been all fun and games until BB allowed the next sentence to flow out of her mouth, "I'm so glad you guys are back together."

You practically choked on your own spit, and Kat was quick to send a look of condolence towards you.

Maddy continued to fumble with her detailed manicure, replying with ease. "We're not back together."

Was she telling that to all of you? Or herself?

Had Nate not replied a no when Cassie expressed her thoughts, perhaps nothing after this would have been as severe as it had. But naturally there is never a dull day while being in love with Madeleine Perez. Not ever.

"I mean I was going to say no, but why are you saying no?"

Shouldn't have dug himself so far deep.

Nate looked around, eying the blue hot tub lining as if the correct response was written there. "Oh, uh- because we're not."

"I know, but why'd you sound so definitive about it?" You had seen Maddy in many different stages of rage. The attitude that she currently had, would only progress further the more Nate argued. And since in Maddy's head, she was always right, and Nate was too proud to let her believe that, he refused to step down. You'd known Maddy long enough to know to fix your tone before she fixed it for you.

"I don't understand what we're arguing about," he expressed. The rest of you sit in an uncomfortable silence as if you were watching your best friend get ridiculed by their parents at a sleepover.

Maddy raises her eyebrows as she lets him know he's missing the entire point. Perhaps if his head wasn't so far up his ass he would be able to let it go. But he couldn't. And maybe this is exactly what they needed. Another fight to prove they were incompatible. "You and your tone," she says, nodding slowly so he understands.

"But we're not back together." You'd never seen Nate so submissive, so small for a man so big. About to light yet another joint, his next addition freezes you in place. "Yet."

Maddy and Nate go back and forth for the next few minutes, Maddy even asking for Kat's opinion only for him to imply she's incapable of thinking for herself. It becomes a mess a lot faster than anyone anticipated. Nate's true self will always come out.

Her frustration only increases. "You see, I'm not crazy, right, because he's always trying to gaslight me."

If she recognizes this, then why is she always trying to work it out with him? You feel something akin to an outsider watching a scene unfold before you, because truthfully you have no jurisdiction for any of it. No matter how much any of you do, it'll never change the light she sees him in. But you see it, and you refuse to let it slip by.

By the time Maddy's onto a full rant about his hypocrisy, the contents inside of Cassie's stomach end up in the warm water engulfing all of their bodies. Screams of disgust fill the dark void that's been painted over the endless and pitch black sky, and Suze comes running out with Lexi hot on her heels. It's embarrassing, really, and you feel guilt as you shake your head and settle further into the home. Lexi seems to be somewhat unmoved by the entire thing, knowing her sister better than any of you. She does the same. You watch the bottom of Lexi's dress subtly swish around as she treads further into the house and presumably into her bedroom. She's tired. Tired of living in Cassie's shadow, and tired of cleaning up all of her messes. She's done.

You can't stay, not after this. It's all too much for one night, too much for you to process. You'll figure out some excuse to not spend the night, and Maddy will likely end up at Nate's regardless. She'll hate you until the morning, but you've had enough.

Nate leaves, finally, and he looks just as embarrassed as the rest of you do. Maddy seemed somewhat unfazed, likely due to the fact this isn't the first time Cassie had gotten overly drunk and did something she would regret. But it's surprising when Maddy changes into her prior outfit, your keys in hand, and looks at you as if to say come on, we're leaving now. What are you supposed to say to this?

Kat announces that Ethan's on his way and you allow your eyes to plead that she just got into the backseat of your car and let you drive her home. She looks at you sympathetically, an empty apology because she knows you can handle it on your own, and you're left alone with Maddy as she climbs into the passenger seat of your car. She buckles her seatbelt, and pulls down the sun visor in the midst of night to check if her lipgloss and eyeliner were still in check within the small mirror. You don't understand how she can be so unbothered.

"You're, like, oddly quiet tonight," she finally says, smacking her lips before looking over to you. You keep your eyes straight ahead.

"Just a lot to process." There was only a matter of time before you got close to the Perez residence and would be forced to tell her you couldn't spend the night. There's no way of telling how she'll react.

The brunette groans. "You know Cassie. She isn't always like that, just when she gets drunk." She's so beautiful sitting in the passenger seat, with her big brown eyes that are slowly growing heavier by the minute. You force your eyes ahead once again.

"I'm not talking about Cassie's drunken antics, Maddy," you say, feeling the heat of her gaze on the side of your face. "Well, maybe that too, but that's not what I'm talking about."

Maddy furrows her brow. "Then what are you talking about?" It could've been the fact you called her by her first name, or maybe your tone. You'd think after tonight you'd know better than to not check the speed in which you were saying things, but you're at the point where you're somewhat apathetic.

Shaking your head, you run a hand down the slide of your face, anticipating the crash and burn's inevitability. "It was just confirmed from Nate Jacobs, not you, that you and him are 'working things out'," you remove a hand from the wheel to finger-quote her prior statement.

"I was going to tell you-"

"Yeah? When? When you call me crying, telling me he's fucked up again?" The look she's giving you will likely linger around the background of your mind for a few days, until you can replace it with something more pleasant. Your heart sinks a little further into your stomach. This must be said. "I try so hard to be supportive, I do, but it's so hard to watch you throw yourself away for someone like him." She's listening, and you make her, because you've spent so much time doing the same. "You deserve so much better than what you allow yourself to experience, Maddy. Someone better than that."

The car is silent for a few minutes. Normally her phone would be plugged into the AUX cord, but it's sitting idly in her lap. You can practically hear the gears turning in her head. You wondered if she could hear the swell of anxiety growing in yours.

"I'm dropping you off, but I can't stay tonight." You broke through the silence as best as you could.

"What? It's my birthday-"

It's pathetic, truly, and the pettiest thing you've ever done. But, you tap on the numbers glowing a neon green on your console, the time reading half past one in the morning. "Not anymore, it's past midnight."

"Are you fucking kidding me right now?" Maddy's yelling at you the same way she had with Nate earlier, and her body had fully turned to face you. She was no longer sitting comfortably in the seat, but sitting up straight as if it would help her hear you better. "Why are you being such a cunt?"

"I'm not trying to be," you say, "I just can't keep playing games anymore. Not with myself, not with you."

She audibly expresses her irritation, groaning and clasping her hands together as she formulates her response. "You're not making any sense! Since when does who I date have anything to do with you?"

"Since you make it my business." Maddy opens her mouth to respond but you're quicker than she is. "I just wish you saw yourself the way I see you."

There's a faint sniffle coming from her direction, but you cannot bring yourself to see if she's crying. You won't allow yourself to be the one who makes her cry. You're not Nate, you're better than that. "I wish people would stop fucking saying that to me." The small crack in her voice is all you needed, and slowly, your heart aches harder in your chest. It serves as a reminder, for what you can't be sure.

"It's true, Maddy. You deserve so much better than what Nate has to offer. That's not real love-"

Big mistake. "What would you know about real love? You've never dated anyone or had anything besides hookups."

You scoffed. It had been harder to pay attention to the road amidst an argument, but Maddy's house was getting closer by the second. If only you could step on the gas a little harder. "You threw an entire fit over Nate's tone- which I'm not saying wasn't justified, but do you really expect it to work?"

"That's real low of you." She's crying and you can see the tears swelling on her waterline. A fear tears escape and trail down her cheeks, each in a race to reach her chin. You want so desperately to swipe them away with your thumb, but you can't.

"Is it? It never works out, it never does. You just keep telling yourself one day he'll change."

"Just take me home, please-"

You took a turn onto Maddy's road. "At the end of the day, is he really who you see yourself with? Do you fantasize about living out a fantasy with him? Three kids, a dog, a white picket fence-"

Tears are streaming down her face. You're being cruel, but you can't find it in yourself to stop. "Please, I can't-"

"What about when he puts his hands on you again? What will you do?" Maddy isn't facing you, she's turned towards the door almost as if she cannot wait to get the hell out of your car. You don't blame her. You've never spoken to her like this before, and it's likely why she's crying so hard. You love Maddy more than anything. "You've spent so much time waiting for someone to love you when you've had it this entire time. I care so much about you, more than you'll ever understand." She whips her head around like you had told her an incredible secret. "I'm entirely selfish for feeling the way I do, and I don't expect you to feel the same way. But please-" You grab her hand in yours, it's limp weight resting on your skin like it depends on it. "Please find someone who loves you like I do, even if it's a man, I don't care."

Maddy gets out of your car and somewhat slams the door behind her. You don't realize you're crying until your vision is blurred by the tears filling up the space, and as they slowly tease your bottom lashes in hopes of falling down onto your skin. You cry the entire way back to your house, texting Kat to let her know what you had done. There's no guilt, just a small sense of clarity to get such confessions off of your chest. Maddy might not be your best friend anymore after this, but at least you can say you did all you could.

By four in the morning, your phone chimes and the brightness brings a wave of consciousness over you. The green messaging icon is aided by Maddy's contact name and a series of photos following underneath. All of the photos Lexi had taken earlier, capturing yours and Maddy's bright, smiling faces in the Howard's backyard, bring a sort of comfort to your seemingly permanent anxious state.

Maybe Maddy hadn't forgiven you just yet, and time apart was necessary at least for a little while. Your wearisome tendencies tangled with your intuition, and you'd fallen asleep that night thinking of those photos. Those would not be the last you would ever take with Maddy-- even if said photoshoots remained platonic, you had to be sure of it.

#maddy perez imagine #euphoria imagine #euphoria fanfiction #maddy perez x fem!reader #maddy perez x reader #rhi’s writing #i cranked this out in less than a week... #dvesinthewind #i've said this but please be patient with me #i really hope i don't end up losing interest in this series #part three is sort of blank to me rn but i'll figure it out #anyways I hope this lived up to expectations #please please leave comments!

[running-with-kn1ves]

Hihi! If you are taking requests...Would it be possible to have a touched-starved yandere begging you for attention? Like, "I will do anything for you" puppy type of begging? Feel free to make it as yandere as you want of course!

Love your stories and characters so so much.

(if u don't like the scenario then pls ignore I love your stories either way 😅)

I really liked this idea! Honestly, probably one of my favorite yandere tropes. This was a lot of fun to write :D Also thank you!! I know my writing power may be burning out atm, but I am so happy with all these interesting requests and ideas thrown my way :))

Possessive! M Yandere X GN Reader

TW: Gaslighting, yandere/abusive themes, violent behavior, blood and bruises mentioned.

"Heyyyy." 

To say the loud moaning was noticeable, is an understatement. 

"Hey doc."

It kept calling your name, that frustrating voice of a ghost.

"Doc c'mere I'm calling you dammit!"

Well, what you wished was a ghost. Instead, it was an unavoidable situation-- a person who made you want to tear out your hair. Making a loud noise of disgust, you responded with frustration.

"I'm not your doctor. What the hell do you want?"

It took all your energy to not stick your hands on your hips and glare at the bleeding man.

He whimpered, his own frustration showing. 

"You won't pay attention to me! I'm bleedin' here and you don't even care!"

You sighed, taking a tissue and walking over to the tattered delinquent. 

"No, I don't care. Because this is the third damn fight you've gotten into this month. Dammit Keon do you ever listen?"

You grunt out of anger, shoving the tissue and pinching onto his nose.

"Blow." 

Keon does as you say, blood dripping onto the white sheet.

"It's not like I do it on purpose..." He says with feigned remorse, barely above a whisper.

"Well it certainly feels like you do. Just because I'm helping the nurses to get some extra credit, doesn't mean you can waltz in here!" 

You grasp your temples, massaging them for some peace. Throwing the dirtied tissue in the trash, you move to grab more bandages and antiseptic. 

"C'mere." Keon says, waving his hand for you to come closer.

You smack your head with your palm, ready to strangle the offender. 

"I know I know just come here." He says, acknowledging your distress.

Walking over to the bed he laid upon, you awaited his interaction. 

Taking your hand, he plays with your fingers. Keon's own were crushed; red and purple dotted his knuckles, straining at each movement. The tips of his fingers tickled your skin, making each hair stand on end. You sighed at the tenderness, feeling at ease.

"You know I don't get hurt on purpose..." Keon says with a pout, looking down at your hands twisted with his own. "I just wanted to see you. You're hardly in class anymore."

Patting his fingers lightly, you move to ruffle his hair. 

"I know that but this isn't good-- you're causing a ruckus with everyone else by getting into these fights. I even had a professor come in here and question me about it!" 

He groaned, looking away from you, bringing your hands to his chest. Removing one from his grasp you pulled his face back to look over at you. Keon leaned into your cupped hand. He gazed downward, lovestruck on how tenderly you held his black and blue face. 

"I'm just tired. Tired of being worried and seeing how you come in here day after day, in pain." The exhaustion in your voice was easy to detect; you were glad the nurse manager wasn't coming in for a while. It wouldn't be the best sight for her to see two students getting affectionate-- especially when you were supposed to be helping heal him physically, not emotionally. 

Keon didn't reply, instead kissing your palm. 

"So then what should I do?" He muffled into your hand. " If I can't be here like this, how am I supposed to see you?" You could feel something wet dampen your wrist as Keon pressed himself deeper into your limb. 

"I'll do anything." He whispered. 

Exhaling, you hoped he'd accept your response. 

"You'll just have to wait."

You said it as lightly and kindly as you could, as it was the truth. No one else was allowed to be inside the nurses office unless sick or injured. The staff was already full, so there was no available spots for him to become an intern like you.

"....wait?" He said, pulling your arm back down to the bed gently.

"Yes," It sounded like he was finally understanding your point of view. "You can't come in here, especially not on purpose in ways like this, Keon. You need to go to your classes as well. I have special permission to leave, but you're failing. Do you see why I don't want to be the reason for that?"

"You want me to wait? Outside?" He asked, looking at you through the hair falling over his eyes. 

"No Keon." You felt like you were explaining the concept to a child; he didn't listen, nor care for your opposing point of view. "I don't want you to come back here. I want you to focus on your classes-- this is a waste of time, I'll meet you outside of class from now on. Outside of here. Can you understand that?"

He went silent, twisting your arm harshly.

The door Keon shut when limping into the room earlier, seemed more of an ominous choice now. You felt less secure having no one available to witness as he moved closer.

"You want me to leave. You want me to go away so you don't have to ever see me again." Keon pulled you closer to the bed; despite his tired look and bruises, he still had an adequate amount of strength left. 

"I can't believe you.. I come in here to visit you, and you want me out? How selfish!" Keon sounded more hurt than angry at your reply.

If it weren't for the table next to the bed that supported your hand, you would have fallen directly on top of him. Even through drooping, glazed eyes, you saw the dangerous anger bubbling inside of him. 

"No," His voice was harsh, but gradually grew more desperate. " You can't make me leave..  I need you. I need to stay with you." 

Keon's protective stance on your arm loosened, but at the cost of his shaking hand grabbing your collar. His bruised face was mere inches away, the stench of blood and concrete filling your senses. 

The man's eyes went wide, looking feverishly back and forth from your eyes to nose to lips. You struggled against his grasp, feeling uncomfortable and panicked at his reaction. 

"Keon just... fine just let me go." His harsh grip on your shirt left red stains on the soft color, fist trembling against your chest. 

Pulling you roughly, he made your face come into bruising contact; his lips nipped at yours, learning how to kiss them in the right way. You pushed the male back against the leaning bed, his nails digging into your skin, scraping away as you tugged. Long scratch marks were left on your forearm, leaving no remorse. 

Wiping his mouth, Keon looked with slight confidence, a looser grip now on your collar. 

"That wasn't how I wanted our first to go but.. I'll take it." He says with a short laugh. 

You stumbled back a bit, the grip on your shirt faltering. 

"If you didn't struggle so much it could've been nicer." 

Biting back the urge to yell at him, you hoped this was just delirium. He never acted like this; Keon was kind and sweet, you didn't understand where this possessiveness was coming from. 

He moved one of his limp hands over to yours, forcing you to unravel your fingers from clutching the bed sheets. 

"Don't make me go, okay? I don't know what I'll do if I stop seeing you for so long." Keon's voice was sweet and pouty, but from his previous actions, it appeared threatening. 

With a bit of blood that was yet to dry, he drew a small 'K' on the back of your hand.

#yandere #yandere x reader #x reader #yandere boy #yandere male #reader insert #self insert #yandere aesthetic #y/n #nurse office #obsession #lovesick #gn reader #darling #yandere x darling #male x reader #oc #yandere oc #fanfiction #writing #romance #horror #romance horror

[bluexiao]

hi im not sure if your requests are open for thoma specifically but if they are, id like to request his reaction when shorter reader pulls him down by his dog tag necklace thing to kiss him to shut him up/when hes being a tease <33 thank u! have a great day/night :)

CHARACTERS. Thoma; short! gn! Reader

NOTES. i lied i’ll post one brainrot today! considering the fact i’m so short let’s say i indulged in this for far too much (also this also applies on others who are shorter than him!) also this doesn’t have any proofread since i’m quite tired so yep. thanks sm nonnie for this request~ i’m sorry it was longer than it originally should be… like i said i really indulged on this one. pls just read the last scenario if you’re looking for the one on the request!

THOMA

Do you know those scenes where the shorter one reaches out for something really high for them and the love interest does it for them from behind? Yes he would absolutely do that with you.

He’s not quite dense—maybe at the start only? Like he wouldn’t know what effect he has on you but when he looks down and sees your flushed look, he’d definitely realize it.

“Ho~, have I successfully snatched your heart?” he muses, but it sounded so light-hearted that you found it difficult to get mad at his antics early in the morning where you’re assigned to cook for the day.

Because you’re smaller than him, he believes he can carry you. Although it’s actually one of his greatest secrets, especially when you two were still not yet together. Before he confesses, however, in order to be sure, he asks if he could carry you on his back—this is so that even if you reject him he’s sure he already had his wish fulfilled by then. No awkwardness, right???

Anyway, when you told him you liked him too, that’s when he confesses about this quite hesitant, actually; a shy smile on his face as he reached for the back of his neck, scratching it awkwardly.

He loves having you wrap your arms around his waist and bury your face on his chest, definitely. He doesn’t even care if you’re both in the middle of the street or something, swaying each other without a care in the world and the other people on it.

He honestly just loves making you feel protected, y’know? To wrap his arms around you like he’s your personal shield or warm blanket from the harsh winters. If you were both in Dragonspine, he’d make sure you’re always warm by having you close to him.

HEADPATS. Ugh he loves them for both you and him actually? There’s a thing with you two when he gently pats you on the head and before you can turn away, he crouches down to your height and grabs your hand to gesture it towards his own, the skin on the corners of his emerald eyes crinkling slightly from the sheepish grin on his face.

“You want headpats too?” you mused and he whined, pouts even.

“Aw, come on, honey~ not after I gave you one,” you don’t even know if he’s genuinely sad or just wants to tease you, but after giving him what he wants, you could see that precious smile of his; his teeth showing as a sign of his delight. By then, you knew what the answer was.

He actually loves it when you pull him by his dog tag necklace and steal a kiss on him. This usually happens on the mornings when he has to go out or maybe at nights when he goes home. He acts surprised but he’s actually not considering you’ve done it a couple of times already.

When you do it to shut him up or just to tease him, he may actually not be surprised anymore. He just smiles and lands a chaste kiss on your lips again.

“… and you know what, honey, there’s another new stall down the street, I was hoping to drop by but then another one from the Kanjou Commission tries to strike a conversation with me! What is it with-hmph—” and he effectively shuts up, eyes slightly wider as he looks into yours with his lips still near your own. He could feel your breath but it felt like you stole his.

Not only a few seconds later, a smile forms on his lips as he chases the high of your lips, pressing a chaste kiss on them before another one, and another one.

“Thoma, honey, enough, enough!” you giggled as you were already around his arms, feeling him kiss your cheek by then, “I just did that to shut you up, you’ve been talking about the Kanjou Commission since earlier.”

“I apologize, honey,” he was still smiling as he then lands a final kiss on your forehead, being longer than the last few ones he peppered on your face, “Now you have my attention. So? How about you tell me your day?”

TAGLIST (pls send an ask to be added!)

@softlybeloved @rim0na @icecappa @sushiyay @scaraslover @beastielevi @cursedraiden @thesatanofpizza @izayanna @stellumi @coco-goat-milk @nonniechan @m3gitsune @thispenguinrocks @chuubear @kiyoobi @catisnerd @ventislatte @weakestpoint @pinkfei @aweebstuff @zhongchi14 @windwheel-aster @irethepotato @squiddaloo @scaramunch @cruxdou @favonius-captain

#genshin x reader #thoma x reader #tohma x reader #genshin fluff #thoma x you #genshin drabbles #genshin oneshots #genshin headcanons #thoma headcanons #📘

[angelplummie]

Please I loved your latest bnha post and I was wondering if you could do the same format (what they're insecure about) but with the shiratorizawa VBC ?

THINGS SHIRATORIZAWA ARE INSECURE ABOUT and how you help them feel better

comfort <33

masterlist

warnings: none!

class 1A boys

USHIJIMA

•has always disliked his eyes

•thinks they’re too small, and they’re really puffy in the mornings

•doesn’t like the colour either, a kid in his class called them ‘poopy’ and he never forgot LMAO POOR USHI

•doesn’t get him down, he has better things to worry about, but it does affect how he feels about his appearance

•one morning, after you stayed the night, you wake up alone in his bed

•you go downstairs to find him, and there his is, cooking breakfast in the pyjama pants you got his from christmas (cute)

• he turns around when he heard you enter, and his hair is all fluffy and his eyes are so tired and puffy and cute, you can’t help but giggle and coo at him

• he’s like “what’s funny?” and ur like “nothing toshi you’ve just got cute sleepy eyes”

•”you like my eyes?”

• your like “ :0 yeah!!!”

•”why?”

•what ushi doensy know is he opened the flood gates

“ >:( why?????? because they’re cute silly!!!! i like how they crinkle when u smile and they’re a good shape, and the colour looks good with ur skin!!!!”

• he went 😮😶🙂😊☺️ and pulls you into a side hug as he continues frying the eggs, kissing the top of ur head

•yeah, that made his day

TENDOU

• thinks he’s too skinny :((

•feels lanky and awkward sometimes

• especially cuz he’s always being compared to ushi who is so big

• HOWEVER, one day when ur hanging out, just mutually scrolling on instagram, he makes a discovery

• he hears you make an angry grunt-yell and push ur face into ur pillow

•”what?”

• you huff and push ur phone in his face, showing him a picture of one of those tik tok emo boys that definitely participated in the cat boy maid trend a couple months ago

•tendou notices he kinda has the same body as him, and they look a bit similar too

• “this man is SO fine i swear to fucking god” (you know when someone’s so fine u get pissed off? cuz i know)

•tendous eye brows raise, and his heart jolts

•”you like guys like that?”

•”uh yeah? let that mf do anything to me. what u smiling at?”

•he chuckles, trying to play it cool as his brain goes 100 miles an hour

•”nothing, nothing”

• the more you know 🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️

SEMI

•this is gonna sound stupid but hear with me

• he’s insecure bc he’s cute, but not handsome

• like he knows he’s good looking, but he’s not the most masculine, and he doesn’t wanna be known as a pretty boy

•he doesn’t talk about it much bc ppl r like ‘??? ur attractive whats the big deal’

• but it’s something he worries about a little bit

•let’s just say u have no problem with him being a pretty man

• but after he opens up to u about not wanting to be seen as ‘adorable’ but as ‘handsome’ or ‘hunky’ (he didn’t say hunky but he kinda meant it)you changed up ur compliments a bit

• whenever he walks into a room, looking lovely as per, you say, “there’s my handsome boyfriend ive been looking for u!!!”

•or when he’s pumped up during a game, when he finds u after they won and pulls you into a hug, you go “ngl eita u looked hunky out there”

•or just when he does things for you, and u jokingly say “oh thank goodness my big strong boyfriend was here to help me!”, even as a joke it makes him glow with happiness that the person he cares about the most sees him as everything he wants to be

• and you don’t have to fib once :)

GOSHIKI

• HATED his haircut when he fist got it, and i mean HATED it

•nearly didn’t show to school it was so bad

•he wouldn’t admit it to the team but tears were shed

•you begged him for hours over text for him to show you, you’re sure it’s not that bad, please could be show you,

•after some time had passed, facetimed you

•when you saw it your eyes lit up and you immediately started berating him with compliments

•”ITS SO CUTE I DONT KNOW WHAT YOUR TALKING ABOUT” “YOU HAD ME WORRIED FOR NOTHING TSUMO I LOVE IT”

• he’s surprised “really????????”

•” YEAH DUMB DUMB WOULD I LIE TO MY OWN BOYFRIEND”

•hangs up immediately, blushing bright pink after you said boyfriend

•texts you ‘thank you’ and throws his phone across the room HAHAH oh goshiki we’ve all been there

hi! as always i hope you enjoyed this! these r so fun to make pls request more of these. lmk if u don’t mind if they’re repetitive cuz i’m running low on ideas for these LMAO as per reblogs and replies appreciated!! p.s send in more requests i’m bored. bye love you bye!!!

#haikyu x reader #haikyu x y/n #haikyuu fanfiction #haikyuu!! #hq x y/n #hq x reader #shiritorizawa #ushijima x reader #ushijima comfort #tendou x reader #tendou comfort #semi x reader #goshiki x reader #ushijima fluff #tendou fluff #semi fluff #goshiki fluff #ushijima imagine #tendou imagine #semi imagines #goshiki imagine #shiritorizawa x reader #hq fluff #haikyuu fluff

[h0tchner]

Any Age, Any Day, Anywhere (Part 1) - aaron hotchner x fem!reader

pairing: aaron hotchner x fem!reader

summary: WRITTEN FOR AN ANON REQUEST: "ok hi so u already wrote a jealous reader and was wondering whats your take on jealous hotch? i mostly see him in fics as possessive and yeah being the leader type i would think he could also be possessive but i also think that he would just be sad like ya know he doubts himself as we saw in some episodes and i think he would need assurance and a lot of convincing that u only love him but if you’ve given that to him then thats the time he would be possessive and god i would love to imagine a possessive and feral aaron hotchner"

word count: 3.5k

includes: kissing, so much freaking adorable fluff, talk of body insecurities, insecure!hotch, protective!hotch, wifey reader, super brief mentions of pregnancy, alcohol, confrontation with a drunk asshole (derek & hotch are all over it tho dw), party at papa rossi's!, smut to come in next chapter...

rating: 18+ (technically there is no smut in this part, but there are adult themes such as drinking, kissing, etc.).

a/n: HELLO BESTIES! This is part one of a two-part fic! The next part will be pure filth, so keep your eyes peeled for some feral hotch content... ALSO! PLS (!!!!!!!!!!!) interact if you liked this, rb, comment, like and/or send me a request if you have ideas for future fics! i love y’all! - rivka💞

“Aaron! Can you come here for a sec?” you call out to your husband from the bathroom, muttering curses under your breath as you try (and fail) for the third time to zip up the back of your black cocktail dress.

“Sure, I just need a minute,” he replies from the bedroom closet, securing the last opalescent button on the arm of his white dress shirt. He looks at himself in the closet mirror, zeroing in at the bags under his eyes and the sprinkling of grey in his stubble. He looks… tired. Tired and old. And he hates it.

Even though Aaron is only in his late-40s, he has lived lifetimes; years of working as Unit Chief of the BAU will do that to a man. Every horror he’s seen and every person he’s lost has weighed on his body and mind. In the past few months, amidst work changes and a new baby, he’s been exhausted and in fear that he’s letting himself go. Of course, being the stoic man that he is, he’s done his absolute best to hide these feelings from you. Tonight, however, he doesn’t know if he can. It’ll be your first night out together as a couple since welcoming baby girl Hotchner to the family four months ago. With no pressing family or work distractions, he just knows that you’ll be able to sense his apprehensions. It’s only a matter of when.

Taking in a breath, he turns a little to the side, frowning at his profile. Aaron winces a little at his “dad bod,” but quickly recovers from the discomfort, milliseconds after it flashes across his face.

“Aaron Hotchner get your handsome butt in here and help me zip my dress! We’re gonna be late,” you exclaim, trying one last time to reach the zipper before giving up and crossing your arms in defeat. You lean back lightly against the countertop facing the door, letting the fabric slip off your shoulders, and wait for your husband to rescue you from the hell that is this dress.

At the sound of your voice, Aaron snaps out of his trance. He shakes his head lightly, as if to physically erase the intrusive thoughts, and clears his throat. Grabbing his suit jacket off the hanger, he flicks off the closet light and closes the door behind him.

Languidly, he meanders from the closet toward the bathroom. He drags his feet a little longer than he normally would, still feeling off and a little bit shy about his appearance.

“Aaron,” you sing, “I’m waiting for –,” your jaw drops mid-sentence when Aaron appears in the doorway.

“Oh fuck,” you breathe out before you can stop yourself, eyes widening at the sight of the gorgeous man in front of you.

“What’s wrong?” He asks, crossing over to you, searching your face for any ounce of reprieve.

“Nothing, nothing’s wrong,” you’re quick to reply, standing from your leaning position to meet him, holding out your hands.

He takes them in his own, cocking his head slightly, his soft hazel eyes boring into yours.

You shift forward, moving up on your toes to peck his soft pink lips.

He sighs into the kiss, feeling the warmth of your lips against his own. It feels so good that it almost makes him forget about how he is feeling… almost. But the dark thoughts come back, and he pulls away from you a bit, reluctantly.

Aaron clears his throat.

“You called me?” He questions, but it sounds more like a fact.

“Yeah,” you give his hands a squeeze. “I needed you to zip up my dress, but now,” you lean in again, “I kinda want you to rip it off me.” You offer him a sultry smirk, moving your hands up to rest on his broad chest. He moves his hands to settle on your hips.

You lick your lips and let your eyes rake over his body, taking in every ounce of his sexy frame. The way his crisp, white dress shirt hugs his solid body makes you go weak in the knees. His strong, toned legs in those black dress pants? Yes please. His soft black hair and salt and pepper stubble on his face are practically begging to be touched. He looks good. Damn good.

“You look…” you pause, tapping a finger lightly against his pectoral, searching for the right word, “…delicious.”

Aaron blushes lightly at your ogling, offering you a sad smile as he squeezes his eyes shut out of embarrassment.

You sense the falter in his demeanor, knowing that there’s something else nagging at him far beyond his usual flustering when you vocalize your attraction to him.

“Honey,” you implore, looping your hands around his neck to bring his forehead down to touch yours. “What’s going on in that big, beautiful brain of yours?”

“It’s nothing,” he mutters, swallowing, rubbing soft circles into your sides.

“It’s something,” you counter, carding a hand through his hair at the nape of his neck. You scratch lightly at his scalp, waiting for him to speak. You’ve learned that the best thing to do when Aaron gets in a mood is to give him some time to gather his thoughts. Keeping him close, physically, is a way to show him some comfort without pressuring him to speak. It encourages him, without words, that your arms are a safe place.

“I don’t…” he starts, and then stops himself. His dark eyebrows furrow and his mouth presses into a thin line.

“Mhm?” you question, fingers still tangled in his thick, black locks.

He pulls his forehead away from yours and locks eyes with you. You let your hands be still now, a silent gesture to show him that you’re listening.

He takes in a breath.

“I don’t look the way I used to,” he says quietly, shifting his eyes away from yours.

“What do you mean,” you urge him to continue.

“I mean, I don’t look like I did five years ago. Two years ago. Four months ago. I mean, I was practically a different man when we first met. I was younger, fitter…” he trails off, visibly upset.

“Yes, Aaron, you were,” you agree, keeping your tone temperate.

His eyes snap to yours, confused. It’s clear that was not what he was expecting you to say.

“You were a different man,” you continue gently, resuming your pacifying touch in his hair, “and I was a different woman.”

Aaron lets out a huff.

“Do you love me any less now than you did five years ago?” You ask him.

“Of course not,” he’s quick to answer.

“Why is that?” You prod.

“You’re gorgeous, inside and out. You’re funny, smart, loving…” he begins, but you interrupt him before he can go on.

“And,” you butt in, “if I were to go completely grey, gain thirty pounds, and only wear a potato sack to work every day would you love me any less?”

Aaron huffs again, but this time he’s fighting a smile. He’s starting to catch on. You watch as a spark of levity returns to his eyes. He holds you a little tighter.

“No. There’s nothing you could do or say to make me love you any less,” he grumbles in annoyance, but his upturned lip and matching eyebrow tell a different story.

“Ditto, baby,” you smile up at him. “I love you at any age, any day, anywhere, and there is nothing in the world that can make me change my mind.”

He dips down then, capturing you in a kiss, grinning against your lips.

You giggle as Aaron works his way down your jawline and neck, gasping as he kisses the soft skin at the junction of your neck and shoulder, thick fingers gripping the sides of your hips. He moves his lips back up to your earlobe, nipping at it lightly as you let out another soft gasp.

“You always know the right thing to say,” he whispers into your ear, pressing another kiss right underneath it.

“Aaron, I know I said I wanted you to take this dress off me,” you say breathlessly as Aaron nips at your shoulder again, “but Rossi will kill us if we don’t show up tonight. Plus, I really want the chance to show off my super sexy FBI husband. It’s been far too long.”

He lets out a low groan into your skin and gives your hips a squeeze, nuzzling his head into your neck.

“Yeah,” he mumbles, “you’re right.”

“Aren’t I always,” you snort, eliciting a chuckle from your husband as you turn around in his arms to let him zip you up.

He takes his time, letting his fingers brush lightly over your spine as he draws the zipper over your back. When he’s done and the clasp is latched, he kisses one shoulder lightly, and then the other.

“Thank you,” you whisper, leaning back against his warm body.

“No, honey,” he kisses the top of your head, “thank you.”

_____________________________________________________________

By the time you and Aaron arrive at Rossi’s mansion, the party is already in full swing. Judging by the number of cars in the makeshift parking lot on his spacious front lawn, there must be at least fifty, maybe even a hundred people here.

Despite the bustle of the evening, it doesn’t take long for you two to find Emily, Penelope, and Derek in the living room, drinks in hand, snacking on some very expensive looking food.

“Hey, look! It’s the Hotchners!” Emily cheers, teetering on the arm of the leather couch, wine glass in hand.

“Hello beautiful BAU power-couple!” Penelope chimes in from the seat next to her, cuddled up into Derek’s side.

You laugh and let go of Aaron’s hand, walking over to greet your friends.

“Hey hot stuff, look at you, look at you!” Derek chimes in, eyeing you up and down before standing to shake Aaron’s hand.

“Oh, please,” you roll your eyes at him as you give Emily a big hug.

“And you don’t look bad yourself, boss man!” Derek adds.

You shoot your husband an ‘I told you so’ look over your shoulder, before untangling your arms from Emily and giving Penelope an equally enthusiastic squeeze.

“It’s good to see you all,” Aaron smiles lightly, all dimples in the low light. He steps in to give Emily and Penelope soft hugs.

“Let’s go get you a drink,” Derek says to Aaron, clapping him on the back.

“White?” Aaron looks to you, even though he already knows the answer.

“Yes please,” you respond, “thank you.”

“Be back soon,” he smiles easily, kissing your cheek, making your heart ache.

Aaron and Derek turn and exit the room together.

Penelope drunkenly pats the seat next to her, and you plop down on the couch.

“We’ve missed you like this!” Emily exclaims, gesturing between the three of you and around the room. “I can’t believe we’ve had to wait nine whole months plusanother four just to have a drink with our best friend again.”

You laugh at her, tilting your head back lightly. “Well, you guys got a beautiful little niece out of it, doesn’t that make up for all the wild girl’s nights I missed?”

Emily sighs, dramatically, “I guess so,” she jests.

“Oh, for sure.” Penelope adds. “You look freaking gorgeous, by the way. I mean, I would have never guessed you were creating a tiny human in that body only a few months ago!”

You blush lightly at her words, “You flatter me far too much, Pen. I owe this,” you gesture down at your figure, “all to Spanx!”

“Amen!” Emily toasts. You raise an imaginary glass to theirs and pretend to clink, taking a swig of invisible liquid.

“Are J.J. and Will here?” You ask them after they’ve had a few more sips of their wine.

“Yeah, yeah,” Emily nods, “they’re around somewhere.”

You take a moment and look around the room, taking in all the sights and the sounds of the party. You see some faces you recognize from around the bureau, but others you don’t. Just as you’re about to turn back to your friends, someone catches your eye. One face stands out from the crowd: he’s a young, suave-looking man in a sharp navy suit. Sandy hair perfectly gelled, shiny brown loafers, and bright blue eyes looking right at you. In another life you would have been exhilarated by his attention, apparent charm, and good looks, but now? Now, you’re married to the love of your life with an amazing stepson and a wonderful baby girl. His wolfish gaze means absolutely nothing to you. You simply flash him a curt smile and turn back to Emily and Penelope without a second thought.

You and your friends resume your chatter, waiting for the men to return with more drinks... only they don’t. Perhaps its “new mother anxiety” talking, but the longer your husband is gone, the more you start to grow concerned. A few more minutes pass of antics, laughter, and catching up until the nagging voice in the back of your head turns into an all-out scream. All you know is that you’re suddenly feeling very overwhelmed need to be with Aaron. So, you announce to your friends that you’re going to hunt down Derek and your husband.

You stand from the couch and smooth out the skirt of your dress with the promise to be back in a few minutes.

You walk out of the living room and into the grand foyer, following the same route as Aaron had earlier. Your black kitten heels click on the marble flooring, the skirt of your dress swishing lightly as you walk with purpose towards the kitchen. You’re so concentrated on reaching your destination that you don’t realize the man who had been watching you in the living room was now hot at your heels, following you through the house. It’s only when a hand reaches out and jerks your arm backward that you stop, startled, just past the grand staircase, turning face to face with him.

“You’re not an easy woman to get alone,” he smirks, reeking of alcohol, still gripping your arm, tight. Up close he is decidedly not as handsome as the low light of the living room made him seem. In fact, he seems… creepy. Really, really, really, creepy.

“Can I help you?” You blink at him, pulling your arm out of his vice grip.

“You sure can, baby,” he steps closer to you, voice oozing with sleaze. You gag at the liquor on his breath.

Moving away, you scowl at him, crossing your arms across your chest.

“What’s say you and I head upstairs for a little while? I’m dying to get my hands on your body.” He jerks his head toward the staircase, reaching out to grab your arm again.

You’re fuming at this point, ready give him a piece of your mind when a stern voice beats you to it.

“Excuse me, what do you think you’re doing?” Aaron articulates, approaching you both with Derek not far behind.

You breathe a sigh of relief as your husband glares at the drunken man vengefully, coming to stand by your side. Aaron pulls you into him, roughly, hand tight around your waist. The anger radiating off your husband is equally terrifying and HOT.

“Take a walk, man,” Derek adds in, coming to stand next to the drunken asshole. The man looks from you, to Aaron, then over to Derek, and finally back at you.

“Whatever,” the man grumbles, putting his hands up, “she’s not worth it anyway. Not pretty enough for the hassle. I just thought she looked like an easy lay.”

“That’s enough,” Aaron snaps, seething. “Leave now, before I make you,” your husband growls. He angles his body forward so you’re slightly behind him. A shiver passes through you at his fierce protectiveness.

“Fine, I’m going to get another drink,” the man utters.

“No,” Aaron interjects, “the party. Leave the party or I’ll have you removed.”

“What’s your problem?” The creepy man retorts, this time, more confrontationally.

“My problem?” Aaron says, angrily. You feel his entire body tense at the accusation.

“Hotch,” Derek warns, “I’ll take care of it. You guys go enjoy yourselves. Forget about him.”

“Come on, Aaron,” you tug on his suit jacket lightly, eyes pleading… but Aaron doesn’t budge from his spot. He only holds you tighter as he continues to stare down the man as Derek ushers him away and towards the front door. He doesn’t falter until they are out of sight.

“Aaron?” You repeat.

He looks down at you, finally, blinking away the fury until all that’s left is an all-consuming love. He releases you from his protective hold, and you face him.

“I’m okay,” you assure him in earnest, letting out a shaky breath.

“Honey, I’m so sorry,” he breathes, bringing his hands up to cup your face.

“Aaron, it’s okay, really,” you bite your lip, shifting your eyes away from his.

“You’re so beautiful,” Aaron kisses your forehead, and then the top of your head. “So, so beautiful, and I’m so sorry.”

“Aaron, can we just go home?” You ask.

“Sure,” he kisses your head one last time before weaving his fingers between yours and guiding you gently toward the back exit.

_____________________________________________________________

The car ride home is quiet. The only sounds are the occasional click of the turn signal, and the hum of the wheels on the road. Aaron is still upset, and so are you, but you’re also… something else. Something you can’t quite put your finger on. You feel guilty for ruining the evening, guilty that you FEEL guilty for something you had no control over, hungry, tired, and… horny? Oh, and guilty for feeling horny.

It isn’t helping that one of Aaron’s hands is planted firmly on your thigh. He lifts it only to adjust the air conditioning or to scratch his nose, but otherwise it remains on you the whole way home. When he pulls into the driveway of your shared house, and shuts the car off, he still doesn’t move it.

“Honey?” You turn your head to look at him. His eyes are closed. You take in the strong features of his profile, noting the prominence of his nose and the way his eyelashes rest on his high cheekbones.

“I almost punched him.” Aaron whispers, opening his eyes to look over at you sheepishly.

“You what,” you exhale, mouth slightly agape.

“That guy,” he continues, bringing his left hand up to pinch his nose. “I almost punched him for saying that about you.”

You snort, amused by his confession.

Your husband lets out a short laugh, squeezing your thigh as he does.

“I would’ve liked to see that.” You’re grinning now and so is he.

He flashes his eyes at you and laughs again, this time less anxiously. You join him, feeling the tension dissipate with every passing moment.

“My big, bad FBI man decking a barely-legal drunk dickhead for making a move on his wife? Where can I get my tickets?” You joke.

As you say the words “his wife,” Aaron’s breath hitches in his throat. His hand on your thigh presses down instinctively. Neither of his reactions go unnoticed.

You lay a hand over his where it rests on your leg.

“You know, Aaron,” you begin.

He looks over at you, jaw tight, but this time it isn’t from anger.

“This is the first time we’ve had the house all to ourselves in months,” you pull his hand off you and bring it up to your lips. You press a kiss to his palm, and then to his wrist.

“This… is true,” he breathes out, studying you, taking you in.

“So, I’m just wondering:” you grin, linking your fingers with his, “are you going to carry your wife into our house, Aaron? Or do I have to walk myself?”

#my fics #aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner x you #aaron hotchner x fem!reader #aaron hotchner imagine #aaron hotch imagine #aaron hotchner fanfiction #aaron hotchner fanfic #aaron hotchner #aaron hotchner x female reader #cm fanfic #criminal minds x reader #my content #aaron hotch #hotch #hotch x reader #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds fanfic #h0tchner #derek morgan #emily prentiss #penelope garcia