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#im so glad I can at least afford his food
spectrum-core · 2 months
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STEPHCLAIR IS BAD AND YOU SHOULD FEEL BAD
Alternative title: a very angry (and tired) Full Stop fan's thesis.
ok, so me being the stephan/sinclair comparison's strongest hater is a bit i really like to lean into, but for the sake of keeping things semi-serious i will try to keep the actual essay content as free of me ranting my frustrations as humanly possible (which i mean commitement to the bit aside this will be hard bc it is frustrating to see people calling them both the same character, at best it shows a very surface level understanding of either character and at worst it shows just reducing them to cookie cutter meme fandom archetypes neither character actually fits into, so bear with me if i slip up and make unserious comments from time to time)
so before i start the actual essay let me say this: this essay doesnt even scratch the surface of how much i hate this comparison you guys cant even possibly fucking imagine ive been obssessed and i mean OBSSESSED with the full stop office since 2021 and im glad i wasnt in the limbus prerelease fanbase because if i had to see people comparing my beautiful boy and beloved best friend to a guy we had no info about other than "hes based of the guy from demian" i would have turned into the joker this is not even about saving my own mental health this is about sparing the entire pjm fandom of the monster i would have turned into
spoilers for ruina and limbus, universe terminology heavy and surface level references and interpretations of demian by herman hesse because imma keep it real with you guys the first and only time i read that book i was still in high school and i barely remember shit.
Table of contents:
Stephan - a summary
Sinclair - a summary 2.1. Emil Sinclair in Demian (1919) 2.2. Emil Sinclair in Limbus Company (2023)
Addressing common arguments
1.- Stephan - a summary
And of course I will start with Stephan, because I love him very much, just like Liwei he's one of my favorite pjm characters (yeah i like him more than your favorite popular character don't ask) so it's not surprising that i have A Lot to say about him, right?
And of course, I do.
As I said in the serrated duo post, a core part of my perception of the Full Stop office depends on the fact that they are poor. Mentions of money are common all across many factions in the game, yes, but the Full Stops are extremely constant about money, how taking a wrong turn means losing more than they can afford, how they can't afford to drop their weapons because they were too expensive, how even getting the permissions to be able to buy and wield these weapons was ridiculously expensive and so on. Of course, Stephan is the one talking about this the most (something I will elaborate on later), but Liwei and Tamaki also make a few ocassional mentions to it in their dialogue and keypages and considering this is a shared business it just makes sense that this is something that affects all of them.
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These are just some few of the callbacks to money that Stephan alone does in his dialogue, without focusing in keypage text or what Liwei and Tamaki have to say about it.
And idk man, at least to me the difference between social classes is an important aspect for their characterization, specially because of how constant the concern with money is for Stephan. From this point alone comparing them feels like erasing a core aspect of Stephan's characterization, a lot about Stephan (and the Full Stop office as a whole, let's be real here) starts making more sense once you read the office as lower-middle class (and I'm saying lower middle class because they can afford some place to live and their weapons, but to me these guys are the types who precisely because of their need to keep bullets at all times can't pay for water or electricity all the time and sometimes they simply can't afford food or if they do they can spend a week straight eating nothing but unsalted pasta).
Now, going back to Stephan being the most outward about his complaints with money, he is in general the most outward about all problems the office is facing, to the point in which he doesn't mind inconveniencing everyone else with his rants, being one of the few guests who interrupt Angela's introductory speech and getting into Tamaki's nerves (something he's well aware he's doing, as these two know each other) at least two times through the course of their pre-battle cutscene, even Roland comments after the reception on how he wishes he would always have been as open about his problems as Stephan was.
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However, it's worth nothing that he doesn't spend the entire cutscene crying about his miseries, and he only starts losing hope at three key moments: when they can't kill Eileen inmediately (making them waste more bullets than needed), when Argalia shows up (forcing them to retreat and making them fail their mission, meaning they won't get paid for this after they already lost a ton of money, as well as turning the situation into something much more dangerous than what they had signed up for) and once they enter the Library (an Urban Plague grade threat they have little to no information about, when him and Tamaki are almost out of bullets so Liwei is essentially the only fixer with some chance of putting up a fight and, you know, making it out alive).
Now, while it's true that Stephan is someone who dislikes danger, he isn't someone who isn't used to seeing gruesome events, his instinctive reaction to seeing a guy getting his head put into a meat grinder was cracking jokes and calling the concept of thought gears "a load of horseshit", which is something that falls in line with him being a somewhat experienced Fixer (sure, grade 5 isn't amazing but we can assume it's still either in the higher side of average or barely above average, and for someone specialized in firearms, which are far from the best weapon in the city, getting that high means he must have some experience and skill, right? more so considering he's been at this for 5 years at most) who has seen a fair share of horrid shit and can be unfazed by (most of) it as long as his own safety isn't on the line.
Another point is... he dislikes danger and is always wary about money and expenses, to the point in which he enjoys checking his bank account (or at least he believes so, if we go for the theory of the artbook profiles being more a mix of what the characters perceive themseves as/would describe themselves as to others, which is a theory i go by, I see him as someone who's convinced he does that for fun instead as out of desperation), but this seems to be more a generalized feeling of impending doom at everything rather than something that can be traced back to a particular traumatic event (anything can be dangerous, anything can cost him money), dude's from the backstreets after all, he's seen shit and he's used to assuming the worst. How I see Stephan, he's a guy who already expects bad things to happen but once things go wrong he starts freaking out about how this time They're Screwed For Real, but he never really tricks himself into believing "maybe things will turn out just fine this time?" or who thinks "well, we've done this before, surely we can handle it again."
This is not very related to Stephan as a character in terms of personality but I think it's still an important point to make as it is particularly related to body mods, his physical condition and his body shape.
So we can easily say that Stephan is a strong dude, at least if compared to real world standards without the fancy and insane body mods we see people in the city have access to. He carries that huge rifle around with his bare hands, something that Tamaki doesn't do and that not even Stephan himself in earlier iterations of his dessign did, and his main talent (which based of my theories is something that can be assumed as "something he's proud enough of to consider it the thing he does best") is physical labor.
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Pictured, Tamaki's talksprite, carrying a rifle almost as long as she is tall with a strap supporting the weight on her shoulders, like a normal person.
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Also pictured, an earlier iteration of Stephan's dessign, carrying the same rifle his current version does, but also holding it with the help of a similar strap supporting the weight on his shoulders.
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And finally, Stephan's current dessign, holding that shit with his bare fucking hands in an exhibition of his brute animal strength, what the fuck is wrong with this man (affectionate)
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And Stephan's artbook profile, the important part here is his speciality being physical labor, not only he's strong but he aknowledges this.
However, I made a point about the Full Stop office being poor, right? Even Roland says that "giving a whole office augmentation procedures is cheaper than keeping a decent supply of bullets in stock" (not the exact phrasing).
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At least personally, I see this as Roland essentially saying "it would be cheaper (and more efficient) to get body mods for everyone in the office and buy another (cheaper) type of weaponry instead", but as things stand, the Full Stops can afford to either buy more ammunition and maintain their weapons, OR to get body mods, and since their whole deal is firearms... well, they can't really Stop investing in them, meaning they have no body mods At All and they got their grades purely out of their own physical strength.
Similarly, Stephan makes a similar point about how body augmentations are required for people to be able to run while carrying their weapons around (specifically talking about the rifles he and Tamaki use).
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And... you know, the whole point is that they couldn't run carrying their weapons because they were too heavy, Argalia mocked them for that, Liwei urged them to drop their weapons, something they refused to do because of the prices.
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Lastly on this point, while it's true that Ruina talksprites have a very bad case of Long Anime Legs (to the point in which how Roland's legs take about 2/3 of his height is a common joke), if we focus only on his head and torso, Stephan looks pretty Wide, and not only because he's wearing thick, fluffy and multilayered clothing, as other characters wearing similar clothing styles still look thinner than him.
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This is all to say: I don't think this guy is a twink, or thin at all. He's a prime example of the strongman build to me and this is yet another hill I'm willing to die on watch project moon turn him into a beanpole once he inevitably shows up in limbus and me turning into the first real world distortion as a consequence.
Finally, Stephan is very notoriously the most informal member of the office, not only being the only one who doesn't wear any sort of formal clothing fully prioritizing comfort and practicality over looks but also completely disregarding formalities with his attitude at work (again, he interrupts Angela's introductory monologue, and again, his first two lines when being introduced are him cracking jokes), being the only member of the office to swear on screen and using several informal expressions and metaphors through both the reception dialogue and his keypage story.
And for good measure, he's a compilation of Stephan being the creature he is.
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The literal introduction of the characters, also known as the moment in which Stephan became one of my favorite characters because he's Just Like Me Fr
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Very normal behavior for someone who hates blood and violence and isn't used to seeing it. This man is more than capable (and willing, assuming money is involved) to murder kill.
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Which, I mean, this attitude is very different from what we see from Sinclair.
2.- Sinclair, a summary
In retrospect I probably should have made this one first because I'm gonna be honest with you, Sinclair is one of the sinners I care about the least (I still like him and think he's pretty cool mind you I just don't vibe too much with most of the tropes making up the character) so what I have to say about him is less me grasping for straws and subtext because I don't care enough about him to be bothered with a super serious and in depth analysis like I did with Stephan and more things we can explicitly see about him in game and things that happen in the novel Demian.
And if I can have a small parenthesis here, people saying that one of my favorite pjm guys Ever is in any way similar to a guy who despite being pretty cool is just Not the type of character I fully vibe with... really, it gets annoying fast. Anyway back to the serious analysis now.
2.1- Emil Sinclair in Demian (1919)
To be able to understand Sinclair as he is depicted in Limbus Company, it is important to first be familiar with the source material of the original iteration of the character, that's it we're doing your high school homework by compiling several literary analysis of a symbolic psychological early 20th century autobiographical novel i hope you guys signed up for this (and if you didn't, though luck! i will do this anyway, I love literary analysis).
In the novel, young Emil finds himself torn between the worlds of light (which can be equated to the Garden of Eden, but it's more tangible meaning for our protagonist is his childhood home and family, a serene and well structure/organized space where he can be innocent, untainted by the evils of the outside world) and darkness (basically all the scary shit that goes on outside, where people do evil things for the sake of it), he finds himself tempted by the violence of the outside world, particularly through the actions of his classmate Franz Kromer, which eventually leads him to consider that due to being exposed to this tainted world of evil he no longer can return to the world of good and innocence.
Here, the character of Demian acts as a guide, someone who helps Sinclair to trascend this binary perception of good vs evil and to see himself as someone worthy of happiness because him witnessing the world of evil didn't taint him as a person but rather merely showed him another face of the world, Demian here mentions the Mark of Cain as a symbol of mental strenght and freedom, considering that bearers of this mark are capable of making their own choices and should be able to go beyond their assigned roles, being able to embody aspects of both worlds. This is to say that Demian's view is less focused on good vs evil, instead taking a more order vs chaos approach (without giving an explicit moral character to either).
In the book, the symbol of a bird breaking out of the egg is frequently used to represent Emil's personal growth, the egg represents safety and innocence, but a bird must eventually leave the egg or it will die, and getting out of the egg is a process than can be seen as violent, as a bird must fight to get out of the egg, and getting out of the egg represents birth but also an irreversible change, it can be seen as breaking out of the world of light and getting permanently in the world of darkness since a broken shell can't be fixed, but it can also mean achieving the enlightment and personal balance to not feel permanently bound to a condition, place or state of being and therefore growing as a person by learning to see himself as a whole human instead of supressing his "evil side" by only forcing the "good side" to surface.
Max Demian is here to show this second meaning of growth/self improvement (while also explaining that Sinclair is permamently growing and must always keep this balance between all the parts conforming the whole being that is himself rather that trying to make parts of himself antagonize each other). This idea of personal growth being one of the core themes of the book.
2.2- Emil Sinclair in Limbus Company (2023)
With Sinclair's source media analyzed (at a very surface level, mind you), we now can start talking about the depiction of Sinclair in Limbus Company, how it parallels the book, why the book symbolism is important for this instance of Sinclair and so on.
When we are first introduced to Sinclair in the game he's clearly nervous, he doesn't know what he's supposed to do as he hasn't worked for a similar company before and he isn't used to the gruesome sight of the bus eating people, this does fit inmediately in the motif of a naive person with limited experience about the world (well, to be fair to him most people won't be seeing man-eating buses at a regular basis, but the average backstreets dweller would be familiar with equally violent situations).
With this said, despite Sinclair's obviously nervous behavior... he isn't really a pessimist like Stephan was, in fact, almost every chapter (counting cantos, intervallos and the short mini chapters such as the Dante's notes update episode) have at least one key moment with him trying to rationalize horrible stuff as something much less violent, or simply going "but I thought this thing didn't work like this..." when confronted with the more horrible realities in the city. He thought the G corp veterans were really going to let them pass without a fight, he thought the people being controlled by headhens were just actors wearing mascot costumes, he thought mermaids were the beautiful half-woman half-fish creatures he heard about in fairy tales, and there's more examples but I don't really feel like looking for The Entire Fucking Plot Because This Guy Is An Actual Protagonist Instead Of A Background Guy Like Stephan Was to make my point clearer than it already is. And it's only when he realizes that the real world doesn't fit his expectations that he panics.
Well, there is one exception to this pattern: his own canto. Here, he panics inmediately as soon as K corp's nest is mentioned and spends the first half of the chapter pleading to turn back while saying that they are going to get killed. So what is different here with the rest of the plot?
Obviously, the fact that is related to his very own very personal very specific trauma. That is to say, unlike Stephan who is wary of anything that can put him on danger or cost him more money than it should, Sinclair has a very specific traumatic event that makes him act Like That (sure, he gets scared and nervous outside that, but these are more normal "I'm unfamiliar with this and I don't fully know how to react, this is normal behavior in a human being" reactions than outright "I am Actually Terrified due to being reminded of an actual traumatic event, this reaction is a textbook definition of post-traumatic stress disorder").
HOWEVER, Sinclair being someone who's deeply traumatized and kind of a scaredy cat when it comes to violence and unfamiliar situations... it doesn't mean that he's incompetent or a bad fighter. Almost all of his identities are terrifyingly good fighters (at least in their lore), Los Mariachis fear jefe Sinclair, Cinq director Sinclair is someone most association members are terrified to duel even during training, Blade Lineage Sinclair is considered a talented killer (it's also worth noting that save maybe for the mariachi one, in none of these mirror worlds Sinclair is precisely happy of being recognized as "the guy who's very scary when he fights people", unlike Stephan who I don't think he particularly likes killing but has a more "as long as I get paid..." mentality about it), the only "not very good at this" Sinclair id I can think of is the molar boatworks id where he's more a mechanic than a fighter so he fears he's lagging behind in that aspect. Hell, even the Canon Timeline so to speak (which is to say: his base identity) has him carrying that huge halberd, going on a frenzy attacking some already mutilated inquisitor's corpse, piercing through Guido's armor and dealing a fatal blow that finally killed him for real. To compare, Stephan is good at physical work, but we don't know about his close combat capacities other than the fact that he dislikes it, for Sinclair however we know he's terrifyingly good at physical combat.
Now, I've seen a lot of people call Sinclair a twink and while it's one of these words that nobody agrees on what it means, let's give it the benefit of doubt and say "alright, for the duration of this analysis let's settle on a twink being a young looking (regardless of actual age), thin man with almost no facial/body hair".
Since Sinclair is a rich guy (not just Any Rich Guy though, we're talking of someone whose family had ties to a Wing, probably not some elite guy like Daniel or Hong Lu, but not a self perceived "mediocre" nest dweller like Samjo either), and pressumably not very experienced in combat in most mirror worlds (we know he has no prior experience in the base one where he joined Limbus, at least), let's say that he has enough body mods for him to be much stronger than he looks like despite being thin, he does look thin and young and much to my dissapointment he also has no facial hair, so yeah, under this very broad definition of the term he is a twink.
However if you start adding personality archetypes to the definition he stops being one almost inmediately, as we've been shown time after time that his "submissive" attitude is mostly a result of him not knowing too well how to impose himself and just going along with what the rest say or do, but he's starting to grow tired of that ever since Hell's Chicken (even if he clearly still isn't great at that), as it should be more than obvious for anyone who even just googled "demian herman hesse literary analysis", Sinclair is undergoing a lot of changes even now, and the game is doing a good job at portraying that.
Honestly I also think he'd be hotter with a sleeper build but really, I don't care enough about him to argue about that.
And for the last point, precisely due to his upbringing as a rich guy AND his traumatic experience with Kromer, Sinclair is not only a very polite and mild mannered guy (again, unlike resident creature Stephan), but also he tries to take as little space as possible, both literally and metaphorically, as Dante notices near the end of canto 3 when they finally comment on how Sinclair never talks about his own problems until it's too late because he doesn't want to bother the others as they probably have it worse (again, unlike Stephan "i don't mind loweing team morale and making everyone in the room uncomfortable as long as i get to vent" Full Stop office).
3.- Adressing common arguments
Alright, now that I talked about each character, let's see some of the most common arguments I've seen people use to compare them.
"They look the same!" No, they don't. The only thing they have in common is being blonde but even their hairstyles are different with Sinclair having a simple bowl-ish cut with slightly wavy hair and Stephan having curlier hair (not to mention the whole point I made about body types because I'm the sort of lunatic who cares about that stuff). I won't even bother with this argument.
"They have the same personalities!" Again, they don't. Stephan is very cynical with a lot of his attitude being clearly derivated from him coming from a poor background and having stayed there his whole life, he also doesn't care about his cynism getting in the way and bothering everyone else. On the other hand, Sinclair is someone who could almost be described as naive due to having lived a sheltered childhood and only having his experiences with Kromer and his time at Limbus as moments of realizing that the rest of the world is Not Like His Childhood House, still believing that the world is a binary of good vs evil and expecting things to turn out fine or be much better than they actually are, just to be hit with the reality of the city Not being a nice place where people are nice and polite and not trying to kill him, this is not to say he doesn't have his own issues but even Dante notices during his Canto that Sinclair makes a point to avoid bothering everyone else with his personal problems, keeping them to himself even if that makes things worse on the long run.
"Both are opposed and harmed by a lunatic!" This is an argument I've seen a lot and is incredibly filmsy at best, half of the city's population are lunatics and the other half are people who got opposed by them some way or another. Will you say that Ishmael and the rest of the Pequod crew can be compared to the Full Stop office (or really, even mention the other Full Stop fixers instead of just focusing on Stephan because he happens to be blonde and can be compared to Sinclair) because of their situations with Ahab? Or the W Corp crew who got their train targetted by Jae-heon and Elena (or, you know, the train passengers who were turned into Love townspeople or puppets)? What about the Vermillion Cross who got killed by the Reverb Ensemble? Or the Cane office fixers? or the Zwei association section 6 who got beaten to death by Gyeong-mi just because he felt like doing so? Or the Liu association section 1 who had to deal with Argalia taking Philip away? Or the Kurokumo clan members when they were attacked by Tanya? You aren't comparing them to either Stephan or Sinclair, right? Not to mention that in her weird and fucked up perception of things, Kromer was less opposed to Sinclair as she was trying to lead him to join her and her cause, even the last things she says before getting killed are her calling him to follow her.
"Both are compared to birds!" Oh, right, because I forgot that a very directed symbolic comparison to a baby bird breaking out of it's shell as a symbol of rebirth, learning about the nuances of the world and self improvement/liberation that is consistently used in the source material Sinclair comes from is exactly the same as one (1) throwaway line the big bad guy uses to mock not only Stephan but the whole Full Stop gang, right. And if you want to say "but Tamaki compares him to a bird once too", yeah she calls him a parrot because he keeps repeating the same complaints over and over, it's still not the same as a consistent metaphor.
"Both are sad blonde twinks! They're essentially the same guy." Sad? Yeah, everyone in the city is sad but their ways to be sad are polar opposites, and neither of them is the pure cinnamon roll uwu crybaby archetype people tend to lump both into, Stephan was merely having a bad day and people decided to make that his whole personality (when honestly we get more insight on his actual personality before Argalia shows up, when he's making sarcastic remarks and getting impatient because they weren't starting killing people fast enough) but he's still perfectly capable (and willing) to murder people, and Sinclair is just... someone who lacks experience about the real world and how it works and has a tendency to get nervous because of this, but he can adapt quickly to situations once he understands them. Blonde? Yeah, but I guess if that's a point to draw a comparison then we should also compare them to Don Quixote, the Tiphereths, Lenny, Yun, Lulu, Olga, every single npc, librarian, and agent who comes with blonde hair from the generator... Twinks? Stephan absolutely isn't one, Sinclair depends on how you define twink as nobody seems to get to an agreement with that, if you define it as merely "young looking thin man with almost no visible body hair" then yeah he is one, but if you go for any more specific definition than that he stops fitting into the definition almost instantly.
In conclusion: if I see anyone else comparing them I'll start blocking people liberally bc I'm sick of seeing that shit (I do that already tbh but just so you know), now scram
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vaaarnarebog · 2 years
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buddy i get where you're coming from, but if you wanna change the animal agriculture and plastics industries, you need to actually fight those industries. not just sending a bunch of randos on tumblr a copypasted ask. you're just gonna get a bunch of haters and nobody gonna take you seriously.
also leather lasts far longer than plastic does. i have a leather jacket and boots that were my father's in the 70's. that cow died before he even met my mom. plastic leathers do not hold up that long. they get thrown out and break down into microplastics, go into our water, and into us. im a vegetarian, but you have to recognize the world is not black and white. i became a vegetarian because of animal ag's impact on the environment. that lead me to finding out that some of the shit i started eating as a vegetarian is just as bad for the environment as meat. there's no easy "just stop eating meat" or "stop killing animals!" it's not that simple and never will be.
People should seek their nourishment and their clothing from more ethical sources, but not everyone can afford to do that. Most people are just worried about whether or not they're going to eat tonight, not what it is they're eating or where it came from.
hi! i do want to change the animal agriculture and plastic industries, youre so right! how would you suggest i fight these industries that get funded by the public buying from them? yes i could go talk to the CEO or something, but i somehow feel they will not listen to me, however if the people vote with their wallet against the cruelty and waste, i think we have a chance. so that's what i am doing, talking to people explaining things and such.
yea, the world is not black and white, the production chains are muddy and confusing, there are problems everywhere and i can't tackle them all at the same time, but i can do my best and that is not to pay for someone (prolly traumatized and on the lower side of income) to kill an alive being for my meal/clothes and explain to other people why i do so. just because it's not simple don't mean we should give up! it's important to do our best even in the face of haters.
yes i get that some people have no time or no possibility to research and make ethical choices, but i am not talking to them (or at least that's not who i am trying to talk to) i am talking to the people who have the choice and maybe don't know enough or don't understand why we should give up these products as much as possible.
about the affordability, about materials, you might be right, but in case of food, lentils and beans and rice and pasta are much cheaper than meat. and i think a lot of poorer countries barely eat any meat, as it is the rich parts of the world that demand so much of it.
i am glad you're vegetarian its a great step towards what you believe is important.
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a-very-tired-raven · 3 years
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EEEEEEE so I've been in a writing mood as of late and I needed some help for a writing prompt. One of my best Tumblr friends(@let-love-run-red go check her out!!! She writes amazing garcello fics and headcanons and is a big inspiration for me!!)helped me out! This'll be a lil angsty sorry not sorry lol
•Nothing to lose•
(Trigger warnings!:Mentions of abuse,death,homelessness, multiple past abusive relationships,and bad cigarette habbits!)
You burst out laughing for what seemed to be the 10th time day as your buddy Garcello told yet another joke. "Seriously tho cello! That one was terrible! " He shot you a wink "heh your smiling though." You tried to wipe the smirk off your face. Unsuccessfully. "Am not" you playfully swatted his arm. He just shrugs "Whatever helps you sleep at night kid."
You roll your eyes, "Hey I'm not the one wearing a long sleeved coat and Jeans in the middle of summer" You sent a playful glare. "Your absolutely nuts!" He returns your glare. "Hey at least I'm not the one who's only clothes are T-shirts,shorts and Hoodies! All you ever wear are T-shirts and shorts. Your the crazy one. I don't see how you don't ever get cold"
You smile softy as you see the way he talks with his hands moving everywhere while he rants. I mean.. you do too its just nice to see someone else not pick on you for that. Its... nice to have someone who doesn't judge you for who you are whatsoever. It's been hard,taking care of three siblings all by yourself. Most would shy aways and call you crazy weird,disgusting,freak you've heard it all. Garcello...
Garcello was different.
"Y/n?"
You snap your head up effectively cutting off your somewhat depressing thoughts. "Hm?" You look over. "Are you alright? Ya kinda zoned out on me. I mean I know I can be boring at times but I didn't know I was a snooze fest" Besides his joking banter he has a face full of worry, Beautiful golden eyes scanning your face as if searching for the answer to a murder mystery.
"Nahh your not that boring. Promise. And..yeah I'm fine. Just kinda spaced out y'know?" He nods his head in agreement. You both slow to a stop. He chuckles a bit and turns to you. "Yeah yeah I know, it's just... I recognize that look, Y/N. Believe me I do.. im sorry to be a buzz kill but.. you know you can talk to me. About anything right?" You give that soft and kind smile that melts his heart every rare occasion he gets to see it. You never smile enough..
Sure there's the joking but... genuine smiles,ones that don't cover a dark and rough interior. He knows first hand what that feels like. So.. he tries. He's tries all he can to get you to smile that genuine smile as often as can be. For both your sakes.
"I know garcy. And thank you. Glad to know it still stands." You give him a quick hug that immediately makes his cheeks warm. He's really thankful for the shade his cap gives his face right about now. "I'll see you later alright? And tell Annie I said hey!" "Alrighty will do! And get some rest tonight okay? Cya." You nod a okay and walk inside your apartment.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------You stare holes into the ceiling. Past memories flash through your mind. Your mother, and father. You were disgusted to call them that. Helping and raising your siblings. Her...death.. being homeless..heh something both you and garcello share in common. Picking up your smoking habbit.. heh another thing. Meeting him.. These past few months.
Its been hard...but its been good. You have a roof over your head. Your four siblings are okay. You haven't seen your older brother in a while but he gave you a call. You have food, water,and.. Garcello and Annie. A smile works its was on your face.
I'm glad I met him' a soft smile works its way onto your face until you realize you thought just garcello and not both him and his sister. YES you love them both- like a family-its not like that- ugh why does thoughts have to be complicated!! You roll over,you have to get to sleep. Garcello told you to! And he said he wanted to meet up for something again. You slowly drift off.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Garcello was antsy the whole walk to the park;the place you two agreed to meet. His face was a mad red. He had your favorite flowers and your favorite candy! Reeces pieces and snickers. He's never done anything like this before. Confessing he means. Sure he's asked a few chick's out but... Nobody important or someone he cares about, nobody like you. You changed his entire life in just the few months he's knew you.. He hopes you'll say yes. then again.. his hopes are all the way up.. who'd wanna date guy like him?
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You look up from your phone to see garcello approaching you. He's very...stressed? No... anxious? Yes Anxious for lack of a better work. With his hands behind his back...Hmmm....
"Hey cello, whatcha got there? You got murder on your mind?" You give a teasing smirk. He just immediately freezes. "I-um-uhm. No. I uh got ya somethin' if that's alright?" He very stiffly sits in front of you. He's sweating bullets. Geeze what's got him this worked up.. "Dang cello with how your acting Ida thought you were askin' me out" you give a light chuckle. He freezes completely.
"Heh uh yeah heh...um..here..you go.. I bought these. For you.. Noone else. Heh" He awkwardly places a two boxes of your favorite candy and holds out a large boutique of your favorite flowers. You freeze completely, mouth hanging open in shock."Y/N...I've liked you for a while now.. your so nice and thoughtful...and you understand me. I was maybe hoping you'd go on a date? With me?" His face is cherry red.
What. He can't be serious? Really he can't. Nobody would ever like you that. Yes you love him.. but you can't afford to love him. Caring gets you hurt. And being vulnerable gets you killed mentally as well as physically You've long sense learned this from your past three relationships
"Are you serious?..Garcello... I cant.. I can't accept this.."
Your heart sinks as you watch the hope glittering off his eyes dim
"Of course I am! Y/N I love you..." Your both standing up at this point. Your both shaking.
"And garcello... I know-i know but please-i just cant!"
"At least tell me why? Am I not enough? I thought... maybe you'd understand.." He drops the boutique. He..he knew it..your too good for him...He really does disappoint everyone..
"Garcello I just cant!can't"! You don't notice the tears spilling down your face at this point.
"But why! I love you! I really do! You mean so much to me!" You take a step back.
"Just stop! don't do that to me Garcello! Dont give me hope! Never ever give me something I want, something I want as bad as you!"
"Why" he's pleading with you so hard..please...just tell him..
"BECAUSE THEN I HAVE SOMETHING TO LOSE!" You hadn't ment to scream. Your fists are clenched and eyes shut tight, you feel as if you might collapse at any moment. Garcello's stunned into silence. "And then I'll be open to get hurt... and I just.." You let out a broken sob. "I'm just so tired of being hurt" you don't move as he engulfs you into a hug.
"And as much as I love you too.. I can't risk being vulnerable again... raising 3 siblings and protecting them so at least they can have a good childhood while you haven't even had on yourself..." You don't notice tears of his own dropping on your shirt. "Being backstabbed and left broken with Noone to fix you...I just can't do it again..." He let's out a broken whisper. "I know Y/N.. I know more than you ever will."
Your just left there hugging in silence. You've decided. You can talk it out because as you were too blind by fear. Fear of being hurt again... he's just like you,two broken puzzle pieces that fit together.
Hope yall like it! Promt idea goes to @let-love-run-red ! Go follow and check her out!
I accept any and all constructive criticism!,
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When Our Hands Next Meet
Series summary: Soulmates are given memories of their past lives when their hands touch. For Virgil and Logan, each memory is happier than the last.
This series was created for @analogicalweek and made in collaboration with the lovely @birdsongisland! Please go look at the piece that inspired this work and support them with reblogs so they’re work can be seen!
Credit to birdsongisland for beta reading this work and truly making it so much better with their suggestions. Thank you!
Chapter 1: Did You Forget?
Chapter Summary: Logan plans a surprise for Virgil on their anniversary, only to receive one instead.
Day 1 Prompt: Debate/Anniversary
Warnings: food mention. If there are others please let me know!
WC: 1320
AO3 link
Taglist (ask to be added or removed): @ace-in-a-shopping-cart @janus-is-an-adorable-snek-boi @logans-library @im-an-anxious-wreck @edupunkn00b
Logan adjusted the flowers in the vase one last time, stepping back before he nitpicked the setup to death trying to get every last detail right. Neither of them liked big, fancy occasions so he always tried to get the details right down to the wrinkles in the cloth so it would be special for them regardless. Frowning he stepped forward to wipe a bit of chipped nail polish off the pristine silky tablecloth, wincing as he looked at the state of his nails. Sometimes he hated how much he worked with his hands that polish never seemed to last half as long as it should, but then he thought of Virgil holding his hands while they watched a movie or their current binge show, carefully applying each color and keeping a hold of his hand while it dried even if it wasn’t strictly necessary- the image made him blush right down to his shirt collar and duck his chin against the smile that tugged at the corners of his lips. He couldn’t afford to get distracted at the moment- at least not for too long. Everything was set, all he needed  was for Virgil to come home.
He’d been surprised coming out to the backyard to set everything up only to find the lawn swept clean of debris and fairy lights strung up, twinkling in the late afternoon sun. He had wondered what Virgil had been doing, running off to the store after dinner. He’d spouted something about an errand, pecking him on the cheek and leaving before Logan could think to ask what he needed to be going out for at six o’clock in the evening. 
Admittedly he’d been a bit distracted with his own plans, digging for a lighter he knew they had to light the candle on the cupcake later. Thankfully said cake was holding up perfectly in the back of the fridge where he knew Virgil wouldn’t see it. Standing on the porch he smiled softly as he looked around, the backyard turned into a magical scene thanks to Virgil’s efforts. He hadn’t thought to set the lights up when he had planned his own surprise, so he was glad Virgil had made it even better.
Not a moment too soon he heard the car pull into the driveway, making a giddy sort of happiness settle in the center of his chest. Never had he been so enamored with someone that the mere thought of their presence lit up his nerves with a pleasant hum that left him dizzy and anchored in the same moment. But here he was, shifting anxiously from foot to foot waiting for his soulmate to come through the door. He only had to wait a minute before Virgil stepped out onto the back porch, confusion settling over his features before he shook it away and a somewhat nervous smile took its place. Smiling himself as he drew near, Logan held out his hand which was taken immediately and gently squeezed. The air was similarly squeezed from his lungs when he finally locked eyes with Virgil, his deep brown eyes glittering along with the purple eyeshadow applied underneath them with a darker shade of lipstick painting his smile.
Blushing slightly, he ignored the other's amusement and tugged him towards the table. “Did you forget what day it was?” He teased.
“Considering we ate dinner in suits- hardly. I was just surprised to find you out here, usually we eat dessert inside.”
“You had already set up the fairy lights. I thought it would be an opportunity missed if we didn’t celebrate our anniversary outside on such a lovely night.”
Virgil smiled softly and ran his thumb over his knuckles. “I’m so glad that I have you in my life, this is perfect. So much better than that auditorium where we first met.”
“Debate club was hardly the ideal circumstance for us to meet.” Logan chuckled.
“I don’t even remember what the subject was.”
“I believe it was one of the duller practice ones asking whether or not peanut butter was ethically sourced- to which you argued you were allergic and therefore should get a passing grade regardless because asking you to talk about it was unethical in and of itself.” Laughing at the memory he watched as Virgil only huffed in mock annoyance.
“It was a good argument!” Screwing his mouth to the side Virgil nudged him playfully. “It was a dumb subject anyway no one had any good counterpoints.”
“I did!”
“So did I, that’s not the point Lo.” Laughing outright at the seething look he received, Virgil held his hands up in mock surrender.
“You did, actually. I remember you doing very well for not having prepared anything.” Logan sniffed indignantly. “Mine were just better.”
Smirking, he leaned back into the table as Virgil’s expression morphed into a “challenge accepted” glare, eager to see where this would go. He always loved getting Virgil into debate moods, he became so animated and focused- a far cry from when he first started and thought hissing was a legitimate debate tactic. 
“I’ll have you know,” Virgil stepped forward purposefully, petite stature making it not nearly as intimidating as it was meant to be. “I’ve learned much better debate tactics since then anyway.”
Quirking an eyebrow, Logan smiled. “Oh have you-”
He cut himself off with a choked gasp as Virgil was suddenly holding his hand while down on one knee, a small box held open in his palm to reveal a ring with a stone that twinkled gently with the fairy lights behind them. He snapped his mouth shut as Virgil smiled that gentle smile, the same smile that Logan had counted himself the luckiest person in the world to see the first day he had seen the emo teen slouch his way up the stage and behind the podium, nerves clearly telling him to listen to his fight or flight reflex but instead choosing to put those around him at ease any way he could. 
“Logan.” He was snapped out of his thoughts with a gentle squeeze to his hand. “Do you remember how we had to shake hands after the debate?”
“I do.” Logan breathed.
“I saw all of you in that moment, every second we’ve spent together since our souls first met. I’ve loved you in every single life before this and in every single one I love you more still. I know it isn’t necessary but- I want to have a day that makes the fact that we’re soulmates everyone else’s problem.” Virgil held Logan’s gaze earnestly as he choked back a laugh. “Logan, will you marry me?”
“Virgil- of course!” Later he wasn’t sure if Virgil had tugged him down by his tie or if he had gripped it when Logan leaned down, but it didn’t matter as their lips connected and Logan could feel his boyfriend’s, no his fiance’s- his soulmate's heart racing underneath his fingers as he placed a hand to his cheek in an attempt to pull him closer.
Pulling away for a moment he laughed gently at the lipstick smeared slightly, reaching forward to try and fix it. “Virgil, that is not a legitimate debate tactic.”
“I’m taking it as a win anyway.” Virgil reached forward as well, pushing his glasses up to rub away a few stray tears Logan hadn’t noticed collecting on his cheeks. He leaned forward to kiss him again, and again, and again while the candles Logan had forgotten he had lit on the cupcake burned themselves out on the icing and the engagement ring was placed on the table in favor of holding each other as close as they could. And as Logan buried his face in the crook of Virgil’s neck and felt the other’s embrace tighten he knew that in all the lifetimes they had and would share, there was nowhere else he would rather be.
Next
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ready-to-obeyme · 4 years
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[OM!] (American) College!AU Demon Brothers
Scenario: Headcanons on the demon brothers as college students (specifically in the US because I don’t know how college works elsewhere), their possible majors, career goals, extracurriculars, ~GPA~ and whatever else I could think of + how meet you in college
Note: I’m hoping to do a Part 2 with the Undateables but honestly… we’ll see lol. This is based off something ~A~ and I thought of for our specific university but we’ve made it broad enough to share HAHA this turned out VERY long
Lucifer
Majoring in Political Sciences with a minor in Psychology
Pre-Law-- most likely immigration law or child custody (there’s definitely a backstory here)
Initially went to community college for the first two years to save up money to take care of his younger siblings
Rejected an offer to go to an Ivy League because it was too expensive; if his siblings ever found out they’d be furious that he’d give up on that chance, but he knows he can succeed wherever he goes (and besides, family is first) 
Transferred into a 4-year university his junior year 
Very high GPA-- VERY
In a professional fraternity with Diavolo and Barbatos 
He didn’t think he’d join one either but Diavolo was the vice chair when he transferred in and the president the year after so… ~nepotism?~ and also Lucifer is charming as heck so no surprise he’d get in
Also rooms with Diavolo and Barbatos
Goes to the gym regularly just to keep fit; gets goaded by Diavolo and Satan into joining an IM team with his frat brothers and actual brothers-- probably basketball or flag football
Probably meets you at a interclub council meeting and mutters under his breath how useless the board members are and you overhear 
“Never have I met more incompetent people.”
“Lmao mood”
“!!!”
Keeps sitting next to you at every interclub meeting then after because at least there’s someone that can keep his mind stimulated (thinks you’re hot if you’re competent btw)
If you somehow meet him on campus, he’s the type of guy to put his hand up and pretend he didn’t see you (just kidding, he always ends up saying hi anyways) 
Will Absolutely Lecture You if you are procrastinating on studying especially if your midterm is, like, TOMORROW
Always ends up studying with him because he’s actually focused on studying and glares at you if you get distracted (but hey you get good scores in the end)
Mammon
Majoring in Business Econ/Economics, Minoring in Statistics
(always ends up in the middle of the “is econ a humanities or a STEM major” debate that leaves him left for dead) 
Planning to work in Business as Finance -- probably has been treasurer or finance director for a club; can even see him being a banker if it suits his plans better
Goes to a four-year university
Decent GPA (or Lucifer would absolutely destroy him), and does REALLY well in mathematics classes
Would room with Lucifer and his posse if they all go to the same school 
Probably in a Business Frat as well because he’s pretty charismatic when it comes down to it but  was an RA for some of his years for the free rooming and dining hall privileges 
Is a very chill and understanding RA (as in he smokes weed with you when he’s off-duty) but is surprisingly well-versed in dealing with roommate issues
Works part-time (gasp) to buy stuff off of Amazon and go out to places 
Spends a lot of time exploring places with his friends, going hiking, rock-climbing, clubbing-- which is expensive, as it turns out, so he needed to be able to afford it somehow
Meets you when you’re eating your lunch outside somewhere and he asks you if you have a dollar he could borrow for a vending machine snack
You exchange numbers with him so he can pay it back (even though you honestly don’t really need it, but why not) and turns out he’s in your GE class
“Heyyy wassup! So glad I have a friend in this class” 
“Oh by the way, did you finish the homework? Haha, I forgot it.” 
Mammon always repays you for your help in food though so you aren’t complaining
Leviathan
Majoring in Computer Sciences
And honestly that’s too much for me already-- the man is doing computer programming, coding-- WHEW-- and they do NOT rest
Goes to a community college but honestly has no problems cinching internships. The computer is his domain-- online applications are EASY, doing projects NOT as easy, interviews? HARD-- REALLY HARD (someone help him)
Probably intends to work with a big company like Google if only to help supply his income so he can live his life going to AX and buying merch 
Most likely moved out of his house mid-college with his online friends (who are luckily compatible with him living-space wise) and visits home once a week 
There’s two potential sides you can meet first: 
Either you meet him at a convention and you both gush about the same character and anime and somehow find each other online (not college related) 
Or his favorite Ruri-chan keychain gets broken off in the computer lab, and you’re the one running after him to give it him
He may or may not owe you his life after that (and if you enjoy anime, well that’s a bonus)
Both of these meetings can happen if he doesn’t recognize you in class because you were in cosplay-- imagine the surprise
The two of you as friends are MASTER PROCRASTINATORS at every assignment the two of you have-- so low-key not a great influence-- but you have fun together watching animes, playing games, talking about life-- anything but actual work 
Always ends up scrambling to finish things-- but he keeps doing it because it’s been working for him so far
You help him prepare for interviews because he’s always nervous before each one regardless of how well his application looks
Satan
Majoring in Comparative Literature AND Anthropology (ya boy is doing the whole nine yards)
Planning to get his Master’s and then a PhD in one of his majors (whichever proves to be more engaging for him)-- visibly excited to become a Professor
College was meant for Satan-- like REALLY; the man is in LOVE with learning; most likely to go and be accepted to an Ivy-League after Lucifer but... truly believes you can get a good education anywhere so it depends on his financial standing (and how much scholarship he gets)
Does get a little disgruntled when his classes aren’t available but doesn’t mind learning something new-- if the professor bores him to death, he’ll read the book
Really good at tutoring people; someone suggests that he works as a peer-learning facilitator/writing tutor and he does-- might as well make bank doing something you always do anyways   
Joins a writing/journal club as an extracurricular and a club that provides tutoring services to the underserved community-- surprisingly good with kids!
He knows friends in high places, so if he wanted to, could get into any party without batting an eye and his favorite professors love him
Spends a lot of his time going out to the city and exploring places, similarly to Mammon, rock-climbing, hiking, paragliding-- anything
He is VERY well-rounded as you can see; competes with Lucifer to see whose GPA is better though
You probably meet him during office hours, and you can only stare in awe as he asks questions that you had in mind, but better; if you’re visibly confused about something, he’ll take his time to help you too (it’s habit at this point)
Ask him for his contact info and you’ll get it, and maybe repay him in coffee? (You always see him at the cafe on campus.) 
Most likely to have a specific spot in a cafe that he is always at that the workers actually save a spot for him or give him his usual order before he even arrives-- may or may not have helped them edit their essays or with their homework as a thank-you so you KNOW they’ll love him forever
The type of person to help you make flashcards and cram if you need it
Asmodeus
Majoring in Dance and Fine Arts (I HC going to NYU specifically)
Considering going for an Master of Fine Arts degree but he might just move to New York and go for being a Broadway Star
College is mainly just training for him and hoping to land gigs in local theater-- and the university theater if there is one-- and building his resume for his big break 
Has SO many extracurriculars, all pertaining to his career choice, but also because he enjoys what he does: drama, competitive dance team, acapella, fashion design
Makes an unbelievable amount of friends, incredibly good at networking
The first time you saw him was when he was performing for a local theater and you were in love with his performance, and the next time you saw him in the hallway of a classroom building, you told him how much you enjoyed it
Always accepts compliments about his looks with grace, but there’s something about truly being admired for his acting and singing that has him preening
Invites you to come out to his next performance, and if not his, then to another play-- and it can be a date, but up to you ;) 
The man is the KING of Multiple Talents and has big dreams to match 
Always finds a way to hang out with you and drag you to every club that he can use his fake-id for (and when he’s actually 21 and above, gets a little offended that he doesn’t get ID’d) 
A night in the town with you is always a good night! 
Sometimes when he has practical exams coming up, he asks you to watch him perform-- and he likes your compliments but actually takes getting all the moves seriously so you better pay attention!
Most likely to move far away to reach his dreams, but he would take you with him if he could-- his little star
Beelzebub
Majoring in Physiological Sciences
Pre-Nursing or Pre-Sports Medicine 
He’s a little undecided, but he’s definitely going to go into the health field because he likes the idea of being able to use his strength to help others
Gets a scholarship from the university because he’s part of the football team, which is actually pretty hard on him because Fall Semester/Quarter he has to keep skipping classes for games  
Always brings a snack to eat with him during lecture-- and is not afraid to bring his entire lunch and make it right in the front row, though he tends to stick to the back because they tend to have electrical plugs 
You most likely meet him during lecture: he offers you an entire sandwich (not a chip bag, not fruit snacks, an entire LUNCH) because he heard your stomach growl during class 
From then on, you collect notes for him when he’s gone from games and even go to games if you aren’t usually the type to just to see how he’s doing; it’s hard trying to find you among the huge bleachers, but he always asks you where you’re sitting anyways 
Really appreciate it if you help him study into late at night because it IS hard balancing sports and academics 
He most likely doesn’t really have any time for anything else so he usually makes up for it during the rest of the year when training is less to volunteer in the hospital or at the gym as a personal trainer 
If you ask him to teach you how to properly lift weights, he’ll definitely help out and the both of you can work out together-- though you feel bad when he has to add four extra weights to each side after you finish your reps
Belphegor
Majoring in Computer Graphics/Animation
Intending to go into making animation or game design-- is one of the brothers who doesn’t really know exactly what he wants to do yet because he’s afraid that doing what he loves as a job will ruin it for him
His family reassures him that they’ll support him whether or not he continues with his path in life, but he’s considering art school and then taking internships in places so he has a better idea on what he wants
Most likely to sell his own original work and become a full-time artist regardless
I think you already know how you meet him-- he’s sleeping in a lecture hall-- either against the wall or on the small piece of wood they call a desk when class ends and he’s still sleeping; and you wake him up 
Sleepily thanks you and continues to sleep through every class that you wake him up to; when you ask him why he doesn’t just go home and sleep, he tells you he’s too lazy to walk back and forth from his dorm/apartment to campus (mood) 
When you add each other on Snapchat or something, he sends you pics of ‘places to nap’ on campus
You always end up studying together because he’s actually pretty good at understanding lecture stuff despite not being awake for most of it-- apparently he’s used to teaching himself 
Will make you art for your birthday and will vehemently refuse payment so he just tells you to take him out for dinner instead 
If you talk about how you’re not sure on what you want to do in life too, he’ll probably say ‘mood’ but is most likely to encourage you to do whatever you want to do in life too 
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blueseakelp · 3 years
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✨childhood storytime✨ (because i do have memories. shut uP i DO.)
backstory for this: i was thinking about taob zuko and his leg and this memory came to mind AND i decided to share it with the entire internet to get it to stop the rent free-ness (content warning for like burns and shit, i don’t think it’s graphic but tell me if i’m wrong)
alright now. picture this. l o n g summer roadtrip (weeks of camping) with one (and i can’t emphasize this point enough) EXTREMELY dysfunctional family. parents are constantly fighting, an three kids and an infant are along for the ride, eldest child was just extremely dumb and lost their phone (who gives an eight year old a fucking phone that was a terrible idea), and they’re in an entirely different fucking state than where they live. (side note: don’t let your future husband drag you along on a camping road trip after you’ve just given birth if he’s not gonna fucking help with your four kids. no i’m not bitter for my mother because she refuses to be what are you talking about)
NOW, shitty fucking car, stage left. it’s already broken down and been towed ONCE this trip, but Parental Units decide that we can make it fucking work. after all, we only have about half of the trip left, it’ll be okay, right? wrong. car breaks down again. tensions are already high and now we’re in fucking fresno, a shitty californian town with the interest factor of the bottom of a boot and the heat of a goddamn oven.
ANYWAYS, we do slightly illegal shit as *fun family bonding* (which is an oxymoron) yadda yadda yadda it entails mostly just riding in the car as it’s being towed, ducking down to keep out of sight, it’s whatever. fast forward to the car dealership. mother is fucking stressed at this point in the trip, constantly taking care of four kids while my father’s off ??? being indecisive and/or a piece of shit probably. and now OH SHIT they have to buy a car because ours is past the point of no return. it’s now good for parts only. we do the whole thing, pick out a flashy and sexy (old and used) minivan, and now it’s time for negotiations because i’m pretty sure we can’t actually afford the price of this car. maybe we can. (money is perpetually tight until we fast forward five years and the Divorce happens and guess who’s making a shit ton more money than we thought?? ding ding it’s Father Dearest!! guess mother and the kids could’ve afforded those new clothes and foods instead of scrounging and saving all that time :)))))) *insert the “it’s free real estate” meme except “it’s financial abuse”*)
SO we’ve got a family of six looking very homeless with all of their luggage in the middle of a car dealership in fresno, hoping we don’t look desperate so we can buy the fucking car and get back to washington before school starts. i don’t remember how it happened that i, an eight year old child, wound up babysitting my six year old brother in an unfamiliar place with no supervision whatsoever, but my best guess is that my mom had a large dose of “I’m So Fucking Tired Of Four Children” juice that particular morning and my dad honestly did not notice and/or give two shits.
scene is set. the eight year old and the six year old, in the little dealership lounge thing-y, strangers milling about, and either ‘ice age’ or ‘kung fu panda’ playing on the tv screen. eight year old me decides, “hey i’m going to go make myself some dealership!hot chocolate!” as one does. i do, and spoiler alert, it’s scalding. my memory is foggy as shit in general so i actually barely remember most of what i’m telling you (*sings nicely* jigsAw puzzle, we’re putting the picture together) anyways, what i think happens next is that i get distracted and spill the pretty much boiling hot chocolate on myself (i just realized this is todoroki vibes as shit except to myself and the burn isn’t as severe. so actually not really nevermind). 
now, MY first (paraphrased) thought, being the fucked up child and product of my environment that i am, was “oh shit. i can’t tell mom and dad or else they’ll be mad at me that i did a bad job at watching my brother.” can you start to see where my unhealthy mindset comes from? i’ve Been this way. my second thought is probably “i’m glad my pants are tan so that the hot chocolate blends in” which like. it did not and im pretty astounded because i don’t think my parents ever noticed lmao.
everything happens, i grab a TON of napkins to clean up the spill, i ignore the pain of burning skin, i don’t remember how bad it hurt or if i cried but the answer is probably yes to both, and i try to do it as sneakily as possible so none of the adults in the room or my brother notice. mission successful, no one has called me on my bullshit, i’m in the clear. i plan on keeping this a Forever Secret so my parents don’t find out how irresponsible i am, and continue to suffer through what im now aware was probably a pretty severe burn, until it heals. i never treated it or anything, so it’s kind of a wonder it didn’t get infected and kill me. wow, so cool.
to end the story, i don’t actually remember ever telling my mother about this, although she knows somehow? i was really surprised that she did, but one day i was wearing shorts and she just randomly brought it up to my aunt. outside of that, i have no memory of discussing it. (probably at one point she saw the massive burn on my leg and asked me where it was from, is my best guess of how she found out) my father, if he knows (doubtful), has never brought it up. the burn now is pretty faded, but it’s also been the better part of a decade so i’d expect that. the only reason i know any of these memories are real is because i have the scar to prove it, so that’s fun for my brain. for all i know, i could’ve blocked out almost the entirety of what really happened so maybe i shouldn’t take my word for it. at least it makes for a fun and interesting story.
OH ALSO I JUST REMEMBERED the burn was pretty brown-ish when it first happened so eight year old me thought i got permanently stained by the hot chocolate for a little while there slfjlsjdfldhfslh
so yeah this was one of like two off the top of my head stories about how i probably could’ve died in worse circumstances from my own inability to seek help but did Not. also, just another example of my capacity of secrets, because i have a Lot and none of them are the fun kind.
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yibyeol · 3 years
Text
5 love languages
@fulmnare​ posting here because tumblr decided to eat the ask and make me redo the entire thing so 😠 
Jayden 
Words of Affirmation
does your muse like giving compliments? 50/50, he only tells them when he really, really means it. 
how easy is it for your muse to say ‘ i love you’? he probably doesn’t say it 
what is one compliment your muse is dying to hear? probably none because he thinks being in that field, it can’t possibly mean anything good 
what is something your muse loves being praised for? being trustworthy, clear-headed. and also the fact that he reads. (jayden: i’m not saying i’m better than everyone because i read, but a lot of the problems in this world could be solved if people just shut the hell up and read more) 
Acts of Service
does your muse like it when people do work for them? not really omg cause like why would he want other people to like do dirty work for him, but also he’s secretly glad cause that means he doesn’t have to do it himself lmao 
does your muse enjoy giving people a hand with work? depends on what, but he’s usually willing and quick to help! 
what acts of service would your muse appreciate the most? he hangs out with the guys a lot so like whenever they ask each other if they’re armed or safe, or when they’re just passing each other a gun, knife etc. also someone preparing actual food for him. 
what is one chore your muse would prefer someone else do for them? washing clothes. he hates having smelly clothes and he also hates (hand) washing clothes. 
Receiving Gifts
does your muse enjoy giving gifts? mostly yeah, nothing fancy though cause he never knows what to give
what is a gift your muse is hoping to receive? books. or like a knife or some weapon always works too im cry he does have a dangerous job after all. 
does your muse prefer receiving more practical or fun gifts? (jayden: ...books...can be practical and fun too...) i’m sorry just get him a netflix membership or something 
does your muse like it when someone spends a lot of money on them? nah 
Quality Time
what is your muse’s ideal date night? anything as long as it’s indoor cause it makes him feel safe 
how comfortable is your muse with prolonged eye contact? not too long please it makes him feel uneasy 
does your muse prefer conversation or just sitting quietly with their s/o? he doesn’t talk all that much so most probably the latter
is it easy for your muse to devote their full attention to one person at a time? yep
Physical Touch
does your muse like being hugged? only by people he has known for a long time and by kids 
where could someone touch your muse to calm them down? shoulders. back. 
is there anywhere on your muse’s body they want to be touched most? only livia knows the answer to this 
does your muse find themselves subconsciously seeking out physical contact? if and only if you’re livia (mr morelli pls look away) 
Jean 
Words of Affirmation
does your muse like giving compliments?  not really, she only gives them when she really, really means it. (not at her taking after her mother at least a good 70% and being stingy with compliments)  
how easy is it for your muse to say ‘ i love you’? she’s probably never said it before so it wouldn’t be easy at all :pensive: 
what is one compliment your muse is dying to hear? “you did good.” “you’re doing great” 
what is something your muse loves being praised for? please praise her for her cooking instead of the fact that she studies well tbh, cause ofc she likes knowing people think and acknowledge she’s smart but it stresses her out more so (jean: well i think i already know i’m not too bad at studying, so...) 
Acts of Service
does your muse like it when people do work for them? no omf she appreciates it and is lowkey touched whenever people offer to, but she feels awkward so no. and she also doesn’t like asking for help.  
does your muse enjoy giving people a hand with work? also nope. unless it concerns her in someway like it could affect her school/work performance, or because she genuinely wants to do things for you because you’re one of those she holds dear to her heart 
what acts of service would your muse appreciate the most? like someone telling her to stay warm, or passing a scarf, jacket to her etc (she gets cold easily) and giving her snacks so she remembers to take breaks in between studying / working. and also going grocery shopping with her because it's probably one of her favorite hobbies
what is one chore your muse would prefer someone else do for them? cleaning chores! she hates cleaning, like moping, wiping off dust etc 
Receiving Gifts
does your muse enjoy giving gifts? yes and no. (jean: buying gifts is so hard so please just tell me what you want and i’ll get it for you) 
what is a gift your muse is hoping to receive? one of those mini portable projectors cause she wants to use it in her room 
does your muse prefer receiving more practical or fun gifts? practical mostly 
does your muse like it when someone spends a lot of money on them? no 
Quality Time
what is your muse’s ideal date night? anywhere and anything as long as it’s warm but she does enjoy night walks 
how comfortable is your muse with prolonged eye contact? depends on the context but she avoids eye contact when she’s upset 
does your muse prefer conversation or just sitting quietly with their s/o? 50/50 tbh she kinda just naturally talks more when she's comfortable
is it easy for your muse to devote their full attention to one person at a time? yep! attention has never been her problem 
Physical Touch
does your muse like being hugged? she used to not but she is getting used to it and more comfortable now! 
where could someone touch your muse to calm them down? hands (her hands shake when she’s upset or anxious so) 
is there anywhere on your muse’s body they want to be touched most? (jean: why would i want anyone to touch me) 
does your muse find themselves subconsciously seeking out physical contact?  not often omf  only when she gets really comfortable with the person and she's in a good enough mood and if she trusts them, she would just subconsciously reach out to hold hands, link arms etc 
Seungwoo
Words of Affirmation
does your muse like giving compliments? yes he probably says them a lot too 
how easy is it for your muse to say ‘ i love you’? it’ll take him forever to make up his mind before saying it, but afterwards it’s just comes easy to him and he says it often 
what is one compliment your muse is dying to hear? “you’re improving.” “better than what i expected” (tmi: jean said the former to him once when they first knew each other and it became his favorite ever since) 
what is something your muse loves being praised for? that he’s good with his hands omf he’s good at fixing and making things from nothing to something with his hands so 
Acts of Service
does your muse like it when people do work for them? n o 
does your muse enjoy giving people a hand with work? yes he’s pretty chill with it 
what acts of service would your muse appreciate the most? someone cooking for him 
what is one chore your muse would prefer someone else do for them? nothing tbH (seungwoo: i do everything on my own cause my grandmother raised no lazy kid) 
Receiving Gifts
does your muse enjoy giving gifts? yes and no because he gets moody over the fact that he can’t afford to give anything fancy 
what is a gift your muse is hoping to receive? a camera  
does your muse prefer receiving more practical or fun gifts? both! preferably something like legos, or like those figure models that you’d have to build like gundam 
does your muse like it when someone spends a lot of money on them? n O please no 
Quality Time
what is your muse’s ideal date night? anything as long as his date is happy! 
how comfortable is your muse with prolonged eye contact? he doesn’t mind it 
does your muse prefer conversation or just sitting quietly with their s/o? 70/30 
is it easy for your muse to devote their full attention to one person at a time? yes!
Physical Touch
does your muse like being hugged? omf yes he used to hug his grandmother a lot and he likes hugging the few friends he has too 
where could someone touch your muse to calm them down? hands ok pls hold his hand 
is there anywhere on your muse’s body they want to be touched most? shh even he doesn’t know
does your muse find themselves subconsciously seeking out physical contact?  yes and no like he likes hugging people and being hugged, but he doesn’t like being touched out of nowhere so he prefers initiating hugs and physical contact himself  
Siwoo 
Words of Affirmation
does your muse like giving compliments?  yes! he compliments a lot by joking so people might take it the wrong way or just not take him seriously 
how easy is it for your muse to say ‘ i love you’? please he says it so often ok especially to his two besties like they could just do something nice for him and he’s already being dramatic like “guys. i love you. you don’t have to do this for me” even though they probably just bought him a meal or something sdjfdsf  
what is one compliment your muse is dying to hear? (siwoo: that i’m better looking than jeongin) 
what is something your muse loves being praised for? (siwoo: that i’m better looking than jeongin) ok but in all seriousness he likes hearing people tell him he’s more decent than they thought cause he's like a jokester most of the time
Acts of Service
does your muse like it when people do work for them? hell yeah he’s lazy so like if someone can drive him around, then he wouldn’t drive himself  
does your muse enjoy giving people a hand with work? most of the time yes! he’s not a selfish prick who doesn’t return favors so aslkfjsdf but if he doesn’t owe you anything and you randomly come up to him, he might just be slightly reluctant cause why would he do that. unless you’re the other two of the trio 
what acts of service would your muse appreciate the most? i think he appreciates little things a lot, like charging his phone for him when he’s asleep and forgets to, reminding him to stay hydrated when he’s like hours deep in a video game, stuff like that.
what is one chore your muse would prefer someone else do for them? making his bed for him lsdkfsdf 
Receiving Gifts
does your muse enjoy giving gifts? yes pls he also loves giving useless gifts just to annoy people like bet he’ll give you a calendar of 2052 for your birthday in 2021 because “i hope you live long and well until that year, man. you can use it then” 
what is a gift your muse is hoping to receive? (siwoo: i have two best friends so i think i already won in life, what more could i ask for?) 
does your muse prefer receiving more practical or fun gifts? please definitely something fun 
does your muse like it when someone spends a lot of money on them? he doesn’t mind either way 
Quality Time
what is your muse’s ideal date night? hanging out with his besties, he’s bringing you along anyway cause he wants everyone to get along. even if you said you want time alone with him 
how comfortable is your muse with prolonged eye contact? he does that on purpose to “assert dominance” ok jk he’s just playing around ofc. however, he does avoid eye contact when he’s lying about something serious. 
does your muse prefer conversation or just sitting quietly with their s/o? conversation omf he talks a lot 
is it easy for your muse to devote their full attention to one person at a time? (siwoo: what if jeongin and heejin get jealous because i spend time with one of them more than the other??? nah i gotta divide my attention fully because i’m fair like that) so yeah he prefers not to just focus on one person at a time 
Physical Touch
does your muse like being hugged? yes omf he probably initiates hugs the most 
where could someone touch your muse to calm them down? give him a hug instead and he’ll calm down quick 
is there anywhere on your muse’s body they want to be touched most? (siwoo: why do i feel like this is a trap question? it’s not like i can answer anything 19+ without people looking at me weird but it’s like this question is asking for 19+ answer so yes this is a trap question) 
does your muse find themselves subconsciously seeking out physical contact? kind of?? like he would reach out for hugs, hi-fives a lot and sometimes he would also randomly touch your ear or something to startle and annoy you  
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illfoandillfie · 4 years
Text
Curtains - Part 5
SERIES MASTERLIST
Pairing: Roger x F!Reader
Summery: First two dates, you and Roger move on
Warnings: Smut (18+), dealing with Emotions, smoking, car sex, public sex, oral sex (m receiving), (slightly hesitant) dom!Rog
Words: 6872 
A/N: Originally I planned chapter 5 to be the last one but some stuff changed from my original plan and it ended up getting waaaaaaayyyy too long so there’ll be a chapter 6 lmao. The Morris Mini Roger drives in this was a car he actually owned (it’s in the photo and everything)
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Taglist:  @laedymoon  @dtfrogertaylor   @ezmina98  @vee-ndetta @atomic-watermelon @kellypenac @labessieisallama @deakyclicks @jennyggggrrr @drowseoftaylor  @hannafuckingsucks  @i-cant-hangout-im-drumming @queenmylovely​
@bohemiansweede​​​ @rogershoe​​​  @lnnuend0​​​  @funitrog​
You changed your outfit about sixteen times before you settled on the right one. It had actually been the first one you chose – a dress you were sure Roger had never seen you in before – but you’d had to rule out everything else you owned before you could be sure, or rather, before you could feel less anxious about the decision. You were determined to look your best and to make sure he evening was fun, even though the nerves twisting in your stomach made you want to pick up the phone and cancel again. It wasn’t that you didn’t want to go, it was just the pressure of it all. Everything that had happened between you and Roger felt like a lead up to this date. Like a great big drumroll building and building until he knocked on your door. And you couldn’t help feeling like there was a big chance you were going to fuck it up, probably for good. So, one by one you held your clothes up in front of the mirror and one by one you added them to the absolutely not pile, discarding them for reasons big and small – too uncomfortable, too hard to get in to, too much a colour Roger didn’t like. The pile of clothes deemed not good enough had steadily grown larger as you added outfit after outfit – this one was too slutty, this one not slutty enough, and this one was something your mother would have suggested and therefore a definite no. Until eventually you’d been left with the dress you originally pulled out and a sense of satisfaction with your choice. Despite the urge to throw up you felt at the knock on the door, the decision was made even more satisfying when Roger took one look at you and whistled.  “You ready to go?”  “Yeah just let me grab my bag,”  “Not tempted to cancel again?” he winked as he asked so you knew he was joking but it still made you cringe.  “Do you start all your first dates trying to make the girl feel as guilty as possible?”  “Only the good ones. C’mon,”  He took your hand and led you out towards a 60s Morris Mini that was parked on the street between your units.   “No van tonight?”  “Of course not,” he said as he opened the door for you, “you didn’t think that was my main ride, right?” he closed the door behind you, shooting you a disbelieving look through the windshield as he ran round to his door.  “Well it’s the only one I’ve ever seen you in,”  “No, this is my baby,” he lovingly tapped the dashboard as he started the engine, “The van I just got to lug around stage equipment. Couldn’t fit a drumkit in here.”  “No you could not,” you laughed, taking in the small interior of the car.  “Hey, don’t laugh at her. She was a gift from my mum when I moved up here.”  “Sorry, just not the car I pictured you in. It’s cute though.”  “She is a bit small actually. Very hard to get a girl into the back.”  “Might have to ask for proof later,”  Roger looked over at you briefly before looking back at the road, “I’m just gonna say this now and get it out of the way so I don’t make this date too awkward later on, but,” he paused and took a deep breath that only made the nerves twist your stomach into knots, “we don’t have to have sex tonight. If you want to take this slow or you want to set some boundaries to start it’s okay, I’d understand.”  You smiled at him as he glanced back over again. His thoughtfulness as least helped ease your lingering worries about his sincerity about dating you, “Thank you. But you don’t have to like take a vow of chastity to prove you’re for real or anything.”  “Because if you did want to wait, I’d get it,”  “Rog, relax. Let’s just see how tonight goes okay? Besides,” you laughed, “sex might make things feel more normal.”  “I’m happy to do anything to help make it more normal. If that means sneaking into the restaurant bathroom with you then so be it.”  After that you fell into an easy conversation, your nerves almost reduced to those you’d feel on any other first date. 
“Have I mentioned how gorgeous you look tonight?” Roger said softly as he pulled your chair out for you. The restaurant was small though by no means empty, other tables holding other dates as well as a family or two. A few of the other people looked familiar, other students you’d seen around campus or the pub, and you quickly realised this was the go-to spot for a fairly cheap date. Nice enough to impress but not enough to break the bank.  “I was going to pay you the same complement. I think this might be the first time I’ve seen you in something other than those ratty jeans.”  “Oi, don’t hear me insulting your wardrobe. And I wear plenty of other stuff.”  “Mmm you do, I must admit I’m a little jealous of your collection. I just have one question, and stop me if this is rude, but how the fuck can you afford so much?”  Roger chuckled and, looking around for eavesdroppers, crooked his finger so you’d lean it, “That’s my secret though, love, I can’t,” he sat back in his chair, comfortably relaxed, “They’re all nicked from the stall.”  You did your best to ignore the flip your stomach did at the sound of the pet name, “The one you and Freddie run? Kensington, right?”  “Did Fred mention it?”  “Yeah, th- the night we all hung out in the van he told me about it,” you hoped Roger would ignore your slight stutter at the memory of what had happened after that night, “Said I should drop by if I got the chance.”  “You should!”  Your conversation was briefly interrupted by the waiter, another familiar face you were sure you’d seen around campus, coming to take your order.  “What was I saying?” Roger asked once you’d ordered, “Oh wait I remember! The markets are great fun even if you’re working there. Plus, I’m sure I could find you something to buy off us.”  “That desperate for sales you’ll shill to your friends?”  “Of course. Easier marks since they care whether we can afford food.” he laughed, “no but you should come. I could take you if you want? As long as you don’t mind being called on to help sell a thing or two.”  “Sounds like fun.”  “That's settled then, you can come watch me work.”  “Second date sorted then?”  “Believe me, as fun as the markets are, I would not be taking you there as a second date. For one thing Fred’d be there the whole time and I’m not so keen on a third wheel so early on.” 
Your waiter returned with the bottle of wine Roger had ordered and a promise the food would be out shortly.  “So, Rog,” you said as he poured you a glass, “Tell me about yourself. Y’know, considering how much time we’ve been together, I don’t really know much more about you than your name.”  “What do you want to know?”  You paused, unconsciously sucking your bottom lip between your teeth as you pondered the question, “I don’t know. Everything,”  “Is that one of your first date moves? The slight lean forward so he can see down your top, the lip bite, the everything?” Roger’s imitation of you fell into laughter.  "Do people actually have moves? I’m just curious,”  “I’ll take that as a complement then. Where to start though...”  There was barely a pause to your conversation. The only disruptions came in the form of your meals arriving, and moments when you both pulled yourself away from talking long enough to remember to take a bite. Otherwise one of you was always in the middle of a thought. He took your words to heart, telling you about his family and his friends and his studies and his band and anything you hadn’t covered in the time you’d already known each other, which was admittedly quite a lot. And it seemed that for every anecdote Roger shared you were called upon to share one of your own, his interest in you equal to yours in his. It was an easier first date than you could have possibly imagined, awkward silences replaced by curious questions, discomfort replaced by familiarity, leaving you both trying to time sips of your drinks for moments when you weren’t likely to spit it out as you fell into another round of laughter. 
“So,” Roger said as he led you back out of the restaurant, leaving the waiter to clear away the empty plate from your shared dessert, “be honest, was it as terrible as you thought it would be?”  “No,” you said with a huff of sheepish laughter, “I’m happy to say I had a really lovely night. Feel like even more of a knob for the whole cancelling thing but I’m glad I eventually got my shit together.”  “Me too. Smoke?” he offered you the pack he’d dug out of his pocket but you waved him off, pushing yourself to sit on the hood of his car as he dug in his pocket for his lighter. He held it long enough to take two drags before you were taking it from his fingers and pulling on it yourself.  “Hey, I offered you one,”  “I didn’t want a whole one, just a puff or two, here look you can have it back,” he took it off you, stepping between your legs, eyes locked on yours as he put it between his lips again. To your surprise he stubbed it out under his foot as he breathed out the smoke.  “What a waste! If you didn’t want it I could’ve taken it,”  Roger smiled at you as he leaned in close. You could taste the smoke on his breath as he kissed you, softly, his hands resting on your thighs.  “Was that okay?” he was still leaning in close.  “Rog,” you said sternly, “stop asking if I’m okay. I’m not going anywhere,” to prove it you placed your arms over his shoulders, pulling him into another kiss, deeper and longer. It seemed to be convincing enough, his hands slipping up until they were on your waist pulling you against him. The skirt of your dress was askew, pushed out of place as his hands rose further up your body, exposing the top of your thigh. Neither of you could bring yourselves to stop for longer than it took to take another breath, hungry for more. Heedless of passersby, on their way to the restaurant or heading back to their cars. Your hands began to wander, sliding back over Roger’s shoulders, deceptively muscular from years of drumming, and down onto his chest. The buttons of his shirt pressed into your palm, daring you to undo them.  “Think I’d like to see that backseat now,” you panted against his lips, toying with his top button, able to feel his breath as he sighed.  “Told you, backseat’s too small,”  “Well you could always come back to mine,” 
He drove you home, moving his hand from the gear stick to your thigh whenever he could, and pulled back up in the same spot you’d found the car when you left, opening your door for you once again. There was something oddly domestic about the way Roger took your bag as you fumbled getting the key into the lock, following you inside. It made your chest feel tight, the slightly sick nervous feeling rearing its head again.   “Do you want a drink?” you asked, already reaching for your wine glasses.  Roger’s seemed distracted as he turned to face you, his gaze pulled away from the doorway to your room, “Uh, think I’ll pass,”  “Alright,” you shrugged, putting one glass back “hope you don't mind if I have one anyway,”  “Actually, I think I’m going to get going,”  The slightly sick feeling only got stronger, “Oh. Okay then,” had you misread the situation?  “I had a really great time tonight,” he said as he took your hand, “Just...don’t want to rush anything, y’know?”  “Okay. Do you, um, do you wanna go out again?"  “How about Thursday night? I’d say earlier but I’ve got a couple late classes and then some sessions with the band.”  “Thursday sounds good.”  “Cool, I’ll see you then.”  He kissed you once more before he left. You could hear his footsteps as he walked the short distance to his front door, while you sat in your quiet kitchen trying to work out what Roger had meant by not rushing anything. Your whole relationship was essentially built on rushing things. The first time you’d spoken he’d had his hand under your skirt and within minutes he’d been in your bed. Now he was worried about it? And talk about mixed signals. Between his comments about the backseat that was practically an invitation to climb on back there and his assurance that you didn’t have to have sex which almost sounded like he was trying to convince you not to, and the way he’d kissed you and kept touching your thigh and then decided to leave, you felt like you had whiplash. It made you feel anxious, going over every moment to try and figure him out as you lay in bed and worried that things would never quite be okay between you.  
Luckily you didn’t have much time to dwell on it during the week. Your classes were starting to ramp up towards exams and you found yourself being bombarded with topics to revise in preparation. A few times you saw Roger around and each time brought a twinge of uncertainty that kind of made you want to throw up, but it was always pushed from your mind fairy quickly, replaced by only marginally less puke-inducing thoughts about studying. In fact, you barely had a moment to think about your second date before Thursday evening arrived and Roger was once again knocking on your door. During a very brief conversation you’d had upon bumping into each other between classes, he’d advised you to dress casually, so he found you in jeans and t-shirt. You’d contemplated wearing a skirt, learning from previous mistakes, but you couldn’t be certain how he’d react to it. Would he teasingly scald you for not dressing casually enough or would he pull you into a public bathroom again? Jeans were the far easier option. Plus it made it that little bit harder for him to get into your pants if that was what he wanted, and you kind of liked the idea of making him work for it.  
When Roger pulled into the carpark behind the pub you looked at him with raised eyebrows, the now familiar sick feeling only getting stronger, “Really? Here?”  “C’mon it’ll be fun. We had fun last time,”  Last time when everyone at the bar had heard you moaning for him. Last time when you’d hung out in his van. Last time right before you’d made an arse of yourself and almost ruined everything.   Roger must have sensed your hesitation because he put a reassuring hand on your knee, “Y/N?”  “It’s fine, I’m being stupid,” you shook your head and pulled a smile onto your face.  “Are you sure? We can go somewhere else if you want,”  “I’m sure. Last time was very fun,”  Roger looked at you for a moment longer but you were already opening the door and climbing out of the car. He hurried to follow, lacing his fingers through yours and giving your hand an encouraging squeeze. It felt easier once you were sat together at a small table off to the side of the room, a drink in front of each of you. You let yourself relax into your conversation, laughing at Roger’s jokes and becoming enraptured with the way he spoke. By the time the band came on stage you’d almost forgotten your earlier discomfort, happy to just sit with Roger and watch them play. Especially when he beckoned you to pull your chair closer to his, allegedly so you could see the stage better, though it also gave him the opportunity to wrap and arm around your waist.  “What d’you think of them?” he asked suddenly, leaning towards your ear so you could hear better.  “The band? They’re okay I guess,”  “Would you say Queen is better?”  “These guys don’t even come close,”  “Correct answer,” he winked at you and placed a finger under your chin, tilting your face towards him. You sighed against his lips as he kissed you softly.  “This drummer is especially unimpressive. Nowhere near as talented as Queen’s. Or as cute,”  “Someone’s playing for the top prize,”  “Mmhmm, did I win?”  He leaned in to kiss you again, his hand resting on your knee, which you took as a yes. Slowly he began sliding his hand up your thigh. You shifted in your seat, turning your body to face him more, though he kept you from crossing your legs, pawing at your over your jeans. A small, quiet moan escaped you as he pressed the seam of your jeans against your clit and you felt Roger smile. He grew tired of not touching you properly though, deftly undoing your fly and wriggling his fingers under the waistband of your underpants.  “Funny how often we end up here,” his voice was quiet enough that only you could hear him, yet practically demanding your full attention, “what’s the rule?”  “I don’t know,” you half whined as Roger toyed with your clit.  “Eyes on me, yes?”  “Yes,” it took some effort but you managed to force your eyes open and bring them to rest on his face.  “Good girl. You know why I want you looking at me?”  You shook your head, biting your lower lip to keep from moaning too loudly.  “There are two reasons. Number one, I don’t want you getting distracted worrying about who can see you. And two, I like watching your face. The way you get that pleading look in your eyes, almost begging me not to stop.” he paused, “Y’know this’d be easier if you’d worn a skirt. Which I’m fairy sure I’ve said to you before,”  “D’you wanna find somewhere a little more private and help me out of these jeans then?”  Roger’s finger stopped their motion and he tugged his hand free, “As tempting as that is, might be better if we head off.”  “Head off like, go back to mine and spend the rest of the night together?”  “I more meant... head off and go home to our own separate beds.”  “Oh-kay,” you said slowly, trying to work out what you’d done wrong as he took your hand and led you back out into the warm night air. You were halfway across the carpark when you spoke up, “Why?”  “Why what?”  “Why do you want to go home already?”  “I’ve got an early class tomorrow.”  “Do you?” you dropped his hand, crossing your arms over your chest.  “Yes. Why would I lie about class?”  “I don’t know Roger. But you’ve been so fucking hot and cold with me I don’t really know what to think. Seriously though, what the fuck is your problem? Like one minute you’re inviting me into the backseat of your car and then next you’re saying you don’t want to rush things. You’ll touch my thigh, you’ll finger me under the fucking table but the minute I suggest we actually have sex you back off again!”  “I know. I’m just...” he shoved his hands in his pockets and kicked a loose stone across the carpark. “Nervous. After what happened last time. The screaming match and the -” he broke off, biting his lip but you knew what he meant.  You softened at his worried expression, “Rog, I’ve told you already that wasn’t your fault. I’m the one that started it.”  “Yeah but I was way too rough with you that night. I could have hurt you, I did hurt you.”  “I think your forgetting the scratches I left you with,”  “That’s different. The way I choked you I could have done actual damage. And then there was the – the other part,”  “Is this what things are going to be like from now on?”  “What?”  “Is that whole fight going to infect every interaction we have? Every time I’m reminded of it I feel awful and embarrassed and guilty, and I can’t help but panic. You keep pulling away because of a bad angry fuck. What if we never get past it properly? What if we can’t?”  He kicked at the gravel again, not making eye contact, “No, I think we can. The moments when we’re talking and I forget about everything else that happened are really good. I just think it’ll take a bit of time to completely move on.”  “What happened to putting it behind us?”  “Easier said than done,” he shrugged, “Come on, we can talk about it more in the car.”  You nodded and followed though you weren’t really paying attention. Instead you were going over everything in your head, trying to find a solution. Just waiting it out wasn’t good enough. There was too much uncertainty and doubt. You needed to do something. Something that would put Roger’s mind at ease about potentially hurting you and fix the discomfort you felt. Roger opened the door for you but you didn’t get in.  “Y/N?”  “We need to have sex.”  “We literally just went over this,”  “No, I know, but we need to. I said it on our first date and played it off as a joke but the more I think about it the more sense it makes. Sex would make things feel more normal.”  Roger just looked at you.  “Think about it Rog. Our whole relationship was built on it. Our very first interaction was you seeing me masturbate and then finding me here,” you pointed at the building behind you, “and fingering me in a room full of strangers. It wasn’t until after we’d slept together a few times that we actually like, talked properly.”  “I don’t know. It’s not that I don’t want to, Y/N, I do. Fuck I want to, but...”  “I get it,” you said softly, taking his hand in yours and gently rubbing your thumb over his skin, “But it won’t be like last time.”  There was silence for a few moments as Roger considered but then he nodded, “Okay, yeah. Um... hop in and we’ll go back to yours.”  “There’s a perfectly fine car here, why drive all that way?”  "Privacy maybe?”  “Rog, since when have we cared about being in public?  “Touché. But I meant what I said before about the lack of space. Might wanna take your pants off before you get inside.”  “You first,”  “No need to be so suspicious, was your idea remember,” but he kicked his pants off all the same, throwing them into the drivers seat followed by his underwear, “I can’t believe you’ve convinced me to go balls out behind the pub,” Roger said as he folded the front seat forward.  “Didn’t really take much,” you looked around to double check for any peeping toms before quickly pulling off your own jeans. They joined Roger’s, though unlike him, you kept your underpants on, “besides, I heard about you losing that bet and running starkers around the block, I know you’re not shy about this sort of thing.”  “Losing a bet is losing a bet. I knew the cost and I paid it,”   “Yes well, apparently that bet and sorting this,” you waved your hands between you, “this mess out, have the same cost,”  “A cost you’ve noticeably not payed,”  “Don’t worry, I’ll get there. But there’s something I want to do first.”  Roger looked confused until you kneeled at his feet, “Woah, love,”  “I’m pretty sure I owe you a blowjob, remember?”   “I remember, but here? That gravel can’t be comfortable.”  “It’s fine, it won’t last long.”  “Excuse you but I think we both know I can last.” The end of his argument was lost in a gasp as you wrapped your hand around his length and squeezed just a little, smiling at his instant reaction. Without another word you looked up at him and took him in your mouth, sucking until he groaned, his hand flying out to brace himself against the roof of the car. You bobbed up and down, gradually taking him deeper, until he hit the back of your throat and you gagged. You pulled back off him, sliding your hand over his length, spreading your saliva out. And then you were back on him, though not taking him quite so deep, pumping your hand over what you couldn’t reach, hollowing your cheeks as you tried to draw more pretty noises from him.   “Y/N, love,”  You hummed in response, earning another groan and his fist banging on the roof of the car twice.  “Jesus, I know I said I could last longer, but I swear to god if you keep this up, I won't,”  You pulled back and smiled at him, “Isn’t that kind of the point?”  “‘Spose so,”  “Besides, we’re in the middle of a carpark and I’m kneeling on gravel. Think I’d prefer this to be over a little bit quicker,”  That made him laugh, covering his mouth so as not to attract any attention from a gaggle of people exiting the bar and jumping into a car, “I told you it’d be uncomfortable,”  You hadn’t explicitly said it and you had no idea if Roger realised, but there was a sense of apology in your actions. Modern day self-flagellation, though perhaps that wasn’t a good metaphor since you were quite enjoying yourself despite the stones pressing into your knees. But in your mind, this made things more even, went some way to erasing the awkwardness and discomfort you’d created. And that spurred you on, made you want to give him a good performance.   “Quiet, smarty pants and let me get back to it,”  He gave you a go on then wave with one hand, “was only warning you in-n case you – fuck,” Roger’s head fell forward as he moaned and you picked up the pace, mouth and hand moving in tandem to push him over the edge. Thankfully no one was around to hear him as he moaned, knuckles white where he held onto the car, hips jerking as you milked his cock.  “In case I what?” you asked swiping at the corner of your mouth with your thumb, as a precaution.  “I was going to say, in case you were planning on riding me before I came, but it’s a bit late for that now,”  “Little bit,” you held out your hand so he could help pull you to your feet, dusting off the gravel still stuck to your knees as soon as you were up, “you still want to do this?”  “More than ever, just give me like a minute,”  “Sure, you know how much I love standing around in public half naked,”  “Take your knickers off and we can talk about half naked. How are your knees?”  “They’re fine,”   “Good,” he stepped in close, trapping you between himself and the open car door.  Your breath hitched as he kissed you, his fingers sliding into your underwear again. To any observers crossing the carpark on the way to or from the bar you would have appeared a regular loved up couple, stealing a kiss before you got in the car and drove away. At least, until they walked behind you and saw Roger’s bare arse and your spread legs. Not that you would have noticed if someone had walked by, much too caught up in how Roger’s fingers felt working their way into you, stretching you out.   “Aren’t you just a filthy little slut,”  “Only when you’re around.” 
Roger wrenched his fingers free of your pussy, and stepped back half a step, holding his arm out towards the interior of the car, “Ladies first,”  You’re just saying that to get a look at my bum,” you laughed, but you climbed inside all the same, pulling your shirt off as Roger followed and slammed the door behind him. In seconds he was reaching for you again, finding your lips again. It felt nice to be wrapped up in him once more, his touch lighter than it had been in the past, remnant concern manifesting physically. You placed your hands over his, giving him permission to be that little bit firmer as he lay you back, your head propped up against the wall behind you, taking a few seconds to look you over before he began rolling your underwear down your legs.   “Wait, um, if you bend your knees for me,” he said, awkwardly trying to reposition himself to get them off your ankles. When he finally had them in his hand he slingshot them into the front seat, drawing a laugh from you. You let one leg fall to the floor as Roger pulled his shirt off, leaning forward so as not to punch the roof of the car. Once his shirt had been tossed aside he brought his hand back to your wet folds, running his fingers along you teasingly slowly.   “Rog please,”  “Love hearing you beg,”  With a whine you readjusted yourself, scooting a little further back so more of your head rested against the wall, getting your neck into a slightly more comfortable position. He leaned over you in search of another hungry kiss but broke it off when you whimpered into his mouth.  “Did I hurt you?”  You shook your head, “just want you to fuck me already,”  “Just, hang on love, give me a second,” he said as he tried to find a comfortable position.  “Maybe if you move back a bit?”  “My arse is already so close to the window I’m mooning anyone who looks this way,”  You let out another laugh, “Can’t you just kneel on the seat?”  “Not unless I want to bump my head. Can you move?”  “Rog If I try to move back any further I may as well sit up,”  “That could work,” he grabbed your arm and pulled you up so you could move across to straddle his lap.    “Alright, just give me, shit-” your forehead whacked into Roger’s both of you swearing. You fell into another laughing fit as you landed on his lap, arms around his neck, though Roger wasn’t quite as amused.  “God, are you okay?” he asked, pushing your hair back to examine the site of impact, “I told you it was small,”  “Might not wanna say that while your dicks hanging out,”  His eyes narrowed at you, “Yeah, you’re fine.”  “Mmhmm, think this can work,” you wrapped your hand around Roger’s cock, making him hiss as you stroked him. You raised yourself onto your knees too fast and felt the top of your head collide with the roof of the car.  “Oh Jesus bloody fuck,” you almost yelled, dropping back down straight away and rubbing the top of your head.  “Christ Y/N,” Roger said getting you to look down so he could see the top of your head, “that sounded bad.”  You rubbed the spot you'd hit, “It’s nothing,”  “That’s it, I’m taking you home. We gotta get some ice on it.”  “I’m fine,”  “Y/N, it’s a head injury,”  “It’s a bump Rog, nothing serious,”   “It could be serious. I study biology, I know how fucking fragile the skull can be.”  You sighed and lay a hand on his cheek, “Roger, I’m okay. This is not a sign from the universe or anything like that. It’s a small bump because I want you so bad.”  “You sure you don’t want me to get some ice?”  “Oh I am much too horny for that,”  Roger still looked a little concerned but he chuckled along with you and dropped his hands to your waist, “you’ll let me know if you want to stop?”  “You know I will.” 
Going slower, taking a little more care, you tried to mount him again, managing it without injury. Roger still seemed wary, his hold on you lighter than you wanted but once again you placed your hands over his, pressing on his fingers until he tightened his grip. Gradually you began rolling your hips against his, letting out small hums and tempting moans against his neck as you leaned in to leave a trail of kisses and grazed teeth. Roger was biting the inside of his cheek as if he were trying to keep himself under control, lest he go too far. He hadn’t been afraid to let his domineering side show while he was just using his fingers, but now that things had progressed, and in the wake of your self-inflicted head knock, he seemed to be holding back again. It wasn’t what you needed.  “C’mon Rog,” you whined between sucking at his neck, “grab me properly. Slap me, pinch me, use me. Want you to show me what needy whores like me are good for.”  He swallowed audibly, fingers twitching against you as you clenched down on his cock.  “Got so turned on inside, hearing you call me a good girl. And I was so close to cumming just from your fingers,” you changed the motion of your hips, drawing a gasp from Roger.  “That’s because you’re a slut who likes getting off in front of an audience,” his grasp still wasn’t hard enough, though he was clearly getting more comfortable and more eager to take charge the longer you talked, your steadily swiveling hips riling him up.   “Your slut.”  Roger growled. One of his hands left your hip to swat at your arse, and then it was back, his grasp firm enough to hold you still, “Enough. I know you’re desperate for me to use you again but we’ve got a problem,” he laced his fingers in your hair and tugged your head back, “Because you’re so fucking needy and couldn’t wait the ten minutes it would have taken to get home we’re here, where there isn’t enough space to do everything I want to do to you. Now, if you really want me to use you, I could always push you to the floor and fuck your mouth. Don’t think I didn’t notice that you stopped when I hit the back of your throat. Maybe it’s time I taught you how to suck dick like a proper whore.”  You whined and tried to rock your hips but he pulled on your hair again.  “Keep still.”  “Sorry,”  He raised his eyebrow and waited another moment before he continued, “I could do that. But I like being in your cunt too much. So instead, you’re going to ride me properly. No more of these teasing little rocking movements. You’re going to put those knees of yours to work and ride me, show me you can be obedient even when you’re on top. If you do well enough, I might let you cum.” He bucked his hips, a signal for you to get to it.  Bracing your hands on his chest you raised yourself up and dropped down onto his cock, careful not to hit your head again, steadily building your rhythm.   “Good girl,” he said softly, sliding his hands up your sides and around to your breasts.  You gasped when he pinched your nipples, disrupting the rhythm you’d found which earned you a sharp spank and a warning to keep going. It didn’t help when Roger began talking again, whispering a filthy stream of consciousness monologue to you that covered every possible topic from the way your tits felt in his hands to why your neck looked better covered in his teeth marks to how much he loved being buried so fucking deep in your cunt, and everything in between. Your whole body felt like it was on fire, burning as he laid claim to every inch of you with his words and his hands and his lips. The feeling only grew when you heard a wolf whistle from the other side of the window followed by Roger’s hitched laugh.  “Jesus, the way you just clenched on me. You really do like an audience, don’t you?”  All you could do was whine, the need to cum only getting stronger as you repeatedly impaled yourself on him.  “Go on, love, give them a show,” he spanked you again, pushing a moan from your throat and you wondered if the person who’d whistled was hanging around to listen in.   You held onto Roger tighter as he raised his hips to meet yours, both of you chasing release. You were done for when he dropped his fingers to your clit, holding out long enough to hear him breathlessly order you to cum. He followed quickly, squeezing your hips again, as you collapsed against his chest.  
When you found the energy, you climbed off his lap and fell into the seat beside him, stretching your legs as much as you could in the limited space. Roger leaned towards the door, winding the fogged-up window down an inch to let some fresh air into the car, before he sat back and threw an arm around you, pulling you against his side.  “Was that good?” he mumbled into your hair.  “Brilliant. Told you there was nothing to worry about. Quite like it when you get all rough, really.”  “I know. Couldn’t help worrying though, could I? I really like you, didn’t want to scare you off,” he said it casually but from how you were leaning against him you could feel his heart racing, your own speeding up too.   You pulled away from him, just far enough that you could properly see his face, “I like you too Rog.” The shy smile you’d offered turned into a fully-fledged grin, the expression mirrored on his face, as he kissed you again.  “Does this mean we’re all good?” you asked when he finally let you go, “no more weirdness?”  “I can’t promise no more weirdness but definitely less. And I’m more than happy to keep sleeping with you until it's gone,”  You giggled, head falling into the crook of his neck, “maybe not in the car again though.”  “I’ll bring the van next time, give us a bit more room,” he bumped your shoulder playfully with his, “don’t want you hitting your head every time you get too impatient to wait,”  “Ooh next time? You got any ideas?” you asked, reaching to grab your shirt and throw Roger his.  “Like what we’re gonna do?” he paused as he pulled his shirt on, “Not really. Exam preps kinda taken over my brain. Only came up with coming here last minute,”  You laughed as he scrunched his nose up and leaned forward to retrieve the rest of your clothes, “let me guess...close and cheap?”  “Pretty much. Hey!”   “Sorry, couldn’t resist. You’ve got a cute bum,”  “No need to pinch it!” he laughed, throwing your jeans at you, "Think I better take you home before you get any more ideas,”  “Yeah alright, can’t sit here half-dressed forever. Chuck us my knickers would you?”  Roger threw the underpants at you, laughing as he watched you wriggle back into them. Carefully he opened the door, sticking his head out to check the coast was clear before he climbed out and hurriedly pulled his jeans on. You did the same, trying to be as quick as possible, while Roger put the front seat back into position and went round to the driver's side.  
The drive back to your street was comfortable, his hand again falling to your knee whenever it wasn’t on the gear stick, but this time there was no question of what it meant. You were still laughing at a joke he’d made when he walked you to your front door.   “You wanna come in? I could make you a coffee if you want?”  “I would but, early class.”  “Oh yeah, forgot about that. You know, you live right next door though, could stay for a couple of hours at least. Or just stay the night and then jump the fence in the morning.”  “I can’t believe I’m about to turn you down but I really can’t. I swear most days I’d say fuck the class but with the exams so close I can’t afford to miss it. And I know if I did stay, I wouldn’t want to leave.”  “I get it. I should probably crack open a book before I turn in anyway,”  “I’ll talk to you soon though, okay?”  “Yeah, okay,”  Roger wrapped his arms around you, pulling you into a tight hug before laying a soft goodnight kiss against your lips.  “You better go or else I’m going to ask you to stay again.”  “G’night. And put some ice on that bump before you go to bed, okay?”  “Goodnight Roger.”
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thoushallnotfall · 4 years
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hi so i just rlly needed to rant and u make me feel safe so - i’ve been searching for a job since the beginning of summer but no one will hire because i don’t have a resume (i’ve never had a job) and i need one rlly bad to pay for my tuition. and my friend runs this one place and she had a job opening and she knows how much im struggling but she chose another friend over me and idk maybe i’m overreacting but i’m rlly hurt and freaking out because i can’t afford anything anymore :(
Oh my gosh! I am so sorry to hear that sweetheart! 😔
Getting your first job can be tough having no prior experience. Even though it's really no fun (particularly right now), most of the time you just have to work somewhere like retail or fast food just to get some work experience under you belt! A lot more stores will start their seasonal hiring right about now. (I've had a ton of jobs, and even though retail was no fun, I wouldn't have gotten the better jobs without having the retail experience; having any experience is better than none!)
You should definitely still make a resume even if you don't have any actually jobs to put on it. Put as many BS skills as you can on there. Word, Excel, PowerPoint, say you're good with Technology, you're a Team Player, you have good Communication Skills, you're a Hard Worker, you're good a Self-Managing...whatever. Look up examples of resumes; I'm sure they have example resumes online for people without prior work experience. If you had any extra curriculars at school or any volunteer work add that for sure. Make sure you have someone proofread it for you too. A lot of employers like that you take the time to make one even if you don't actually have any jobs on it; it helps! Some places won't even look at applications without one nowadays!
Finding your first job is hard, but just remember you can take a crappy job just to get something and if you find something better even a month later it's okay to leave. When I was younger I would just apply everywhere that was hiring to spread as wide of a net as possible. I was never qualified for any job I got, so whatever it is, if it seems like you might be able to do it just apply for it! The worst they can do is not call you, and if they interview you and you don't get it, that's still great practice!
Also, make sure to call any place you apply to like a week after you apply and ask them if they got your application. It shows you really want the job and it makes them go look for your application. (or at least they're more likely to remember your name when they look through them later)
As far as your friend goes, I would just sit down and try to vocalize your feelings with her. You might not be able to get the job now, but I think you should still talk to her about you're feeling. She may not realize she hurt you or realize just how bad you're struggling. Making assumptions in relationships and not communicating can lead to a lot of hurt/repressed feelings and that can lead to trouble in your friendship if you're not careful.
I hope some of that was helpful! I'm glad you feel safe coming to me with your problems. 🥺 I know it's tough right now, but you'll get though this! ❤️
-Rachel
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gg-astrology · 4 years
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hiii!! i'm that hannah montana but seokjin agenda anon, tell hi to your friend!! the lvl of my satisfaction is impossible to describe, thank you for your service. and yes, you've fulfilled my request!! i really appreciate your efforts, it was on point!! can i request more bangtan things?? only if it's alright with you :| can you do the same ranking for them from ' i'm rich 3$, wine and dine me' to 'i have a rolled blanket as my pillow' *cough* jk *cough*. from that to a simpler lifestyle? thk!
Hey there!! 💕❤️💕 Welcome back!!! 💕❤️💕💕❤️💕 slkskjnsdkjns she saw this and im really glad u like it!! 💕❤️💕💕❤️💕 
U can! 💕❤️💕Me and my friend really like your questions because it’s very thoughtful and fun!! 💕❤️💕 
EDIT: My friend said they interpreted this question differently into ‘how complex vs simple’ their lifestyle is and!!!!!!!!!! maybe we’ll edit and add it in anon if u send in another ask I’ll ask my friend if they want to answer?? I’m sorry!!!!! My 2nd house sun immediately: Wealth  
Please send us more questions, but maybe not this one bc it’s about their personal lifestyle/how they live (+ not their personalities or what they’ve shown us) and it may be treading on 1. making assumptions about their personal life in which we’re in no authoritative position to commentate on  
2. we can obviously talk about how we view them and write commentaries on how we feel/what we think, but there’s also a line where we have to acknowledge people might see us as credible information/authority in our own rights when it’s out in public/shared to an audience 
3. what they’ve shown us clear boundaries between public figures and their audience might be wiser 
4. acknowledging our position of power + influence to the community rather than ignoring the fact that our words have sway will help us in the long-run by making conscious, thoughtful choices on what we could give/bring to the fan/outside community as well. 
I hope this makes sense?? 💕❤️💕 I hope it’s ok if I mulled it over last night and thought I might not – it might not be the best idea to talk about it/put it out there?? 
Please don’t feel bad at all!! 💕❤️💕I really love your questions and I actually wrote as I tried to figure out how to do this (literally just disclaimers before I realized oh maybe there’s no way to do this properly and I shouldn’t??) – I don’t want you to get out of this ask empty-handed, so if it makes it any better – I’ll publish my working through below the read more and you might see what I was working out as I try to answer your question?? 💕❤️💕 
Long commentary on BTS privilege, social inequality + wealth disparities in the real world (disclaimer for this ask?)  +  Working Outs and Why It Didn’t Work ⬇️
Note: From here on below is me writing my thoughts down as I tried to answer the ask, I hope that – even though I couldn’t answer your question – this is a good answer in other regards either way? Hopefully? 
Just a disclaimer note on BTS and this topic as well: In my head I’m immediately going into commentary about social inequality, wealth disparity and how poverty + classism exists in real life. 
Just a quick tangent, but real people suffer from this issue. Our society have consequences when it comes to wealth inequality + the ability to afford basic human amenities (healthcare, living/housing, food, education, transportation, disabilities etc.) 
Even when they’re relatable, BTS are billionaires who knows their position is privileged. Lets - make that clear for a second.  
They still do their best in variety shows where they have to compete/entertain the audience. What I’m trying to say is. I’d rather not ignore/make note that there’s a difference between being privileged, being aware of these issues and still preferring simpler lifestyles for themselves. Than being ignorant and completely insensitive/unaffected from the matter. They’re still privileged, let’s make that clear. And thus, as relatable as they are to the public/audience, they benefit from the social/economical/political power they have given by those around them (their audience, accessibility medias and production).  
In the context that is related (i.e. army joking that BTS fights over ramen) – BTS have never once shown that they’re unaware of their wealth + privilege, even it was a joke – the thing that is missing is the context –  they’re usually seen competing in BTS run/gayo, but it’s produced to let them showcase their dynamic and chemistry  - the prize (commodities/money) was never actually the main focus. 
A highly competitive game with members who know each other well - is actually what these shows are about. 
BTS doesn’t glorify their own wealth, nor have they acted as if they are poor in order to gain relatability or sympathy from the audience/masses (looking at armis 💜 who does this. delete armi 💜) 
It’s a part of why they have fans and why people like them. They’re able to sell products + contribute to relief/charity organizations and advocate campaigns.  Whilst they are in position of privilege compared to others - they’ve never not acknowledged that they could afford to do so for reasonable personal requests (i.e. safety on flights and in airports, security in their home, equipments to perform/produce with, reaching out to audiences that usually never has the opportunity to connect with them despite liking them for a long time, etc.)
I think it’s just important to note - for those who are armys and those who are looking at it from the outside - that this is what we see and why we’re talking about this. 
I just want us to acknowledge that they’re privileged and their lifestyle choices are personal, I think that’s what I’m doing here. 
So, commentary on social inequality of the world we all live in + BTS privilege in all this/disparities. check.
This is going to be disgustingly generalized to an incredible amount because we don’t have houses – to be completely honest, within the context of the question having houses is exactly what we need for these types of answers. 
From a technical stand-point, not having houses when we’re talking about specific contexts within a person’s life (basically why we have so many houses - for different contexts) – will make this reading terribly vague and misleading as well. 
Actually, should we do this at all.. because simply saying oh Taurus/Libra placements would want materialistic things to show x, y, z is incredibly misgiving and is like a blanket statement. Without houses in question, there’s no specification on what it is used for or what kind, or what type of actions/manifestations these signs are going to have in order to express themselves.  
Planets in signs can only do so much to talk about the energy that is being produced – placing them in houses and context, gives them manifestation that doesn’t simply exist in a vacuum by itself.
All placements in a chart make up a cohesive picture of what it is used for, when and where. With only the how/why (placements) — the best I can probably do to answer the question is just explain how it could possibly manifest and why/what reasoning it may have to express itself that way.
While that is something I could? probably talk about. It… just doesn’t answer the question in a way that’s satisfying. This question is really good… and there’s a way to get there and give it the answer it wants. But.. with what we have, it’s a disservice to answer half-right and do a poor job overall, than to actually give the full answer.
Hnnnfghfnhgn there’s also.. some disclaimers on personal life for idols/public figures and how this might.. be almost assuming or intruding on that territory? From a glance it isn’t like it’s not something they’ve not shown us publicly or told us about. But they also didn’t advertise it, and what they do with their personal life/lifestyle– is that something we (as fan) are in anyway, shape or form, capable or have any voice to talk about as if we know what they’re doing? Does that? make sense? 
Like, intruding as in - do we have any authority to tell them to get a pillow or stop drinking wine or something like that. Speculate, on what restaurant they go to/how $$$ it is, or does things that are privileged, things that aren’t going to han river to bike, etc. Can we really pick and choose certain choices they choose to do with their lifestyle, while being completely separated from reality of their other?
Idk.. this is getting complicated.. but maybe sticking to things they are proud of and does talk about openly/happily in their public and professional persona might be better… considering that they should have? a modicum of personal life back to themselves? we could at least do that and choose to respect them right… thats? hm. what’s right.
Fine wine and dine, lavish restaurants and other personal choices on their expenses and love for/lifestyle… maybe.. its for the best if we leave it to their own authority and discretion, over their own private/personal life and what they choose to share with people they know/care for/love. 
I think the end all of it might just be: can I imagine them coming to say to us “army, you know how I am right? I’m like this in my personal lifestyle/choice” – and of what they could say, I don’t think that’s something they may be willing to share without their explicit consent, nor can I imagine it right now if it’s about messy habits or a flaw they may have. So hm. 
The question addresses simpler lifestyle too – we don’t have authority to commentate on JK’s pillow choices, but being exposed like that suddenly might not be something he’s entirely comfortable with or would advertise to others as well? Not to mention, they all seem to not advertise anything that is outrageously privileged that would smack anyone in the face – they’re pretty sensitive to keeping things personal, private, under-wraps. Even when they choose to eat at a well-known restaurant, it’s not in bad-taste or done frivolously. In a way, they all tend to keep a simpler lifestyle about them to not let their wealth + privilege get in the way of their work + connecting to us, focusing solely on what their skills are + performance and music. 
Simply going by that.. is it wise to talk about something we might just choose to show decency/a modicum of respect for the idol’s privacy maybe.. uhhdfjgnn i!!!!!!!!! there’s thoughts and feelings and im just trying to let it out so it makes sense and then i can navigate between it and see what i can do/the right way to talk about it (if it exists)!!
God.. I guess there’s.. no way I can possibly do this?? Considering if I think about it from all sides – I can’t approach it technically, without houses. I literally can’t answer this question, it isn’t about choice because answering this question is directly asking about the houses. So I literally can’t answer correctly. I also can’t – or well, I don’t think the moral issue is ok here when I think further on it. Consequences are inevitable with all posts/production, but optimizing it so that it affects people positively and minimize damage to others is always something to check through. This may not be a good idea, just to do. So maybe not. 
Hhndndhnndf ok,,, gotta,,, write something for the introduction so it makes sense.
Note: I did go through this, edit and write some additional paragraphs to make it make sense. But I hope this? gives you insight or some thoughts to my working process and what I consider/go through when I make these posts as well? Thank u for ur time, I hope it isn’t too disappointing ;;  let me know what u think/how u feel anon I’m sorry I couldn’t do this question but please let me know if you’re ok or not!!!! 💕❤️💕💕❤️💕
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imaginetyzx · 4 years
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“If you wanted to go on a date, you could have just asked.” wwwiiiiiith...... heh.... kyoya. Totally not obsessed, reigenquest
ahhhh very late but here we go! im winging it here
(oh btw were like. rewinding my age for the sake of plot. pretend im just fresh into 18)
The only thing luckier than the fact I got into Ouran was that I was able to convince them to let me have a boys uniform. The only thing is, I’m not out to my family, so when I leave for school I wear the girls uniform, and then change in the bathroom when I get there. Thanks to this, not only does almost everyone use he/him for me, but I also met the Host Club. It’s surprising I never heard about it though, considering I’m a third year.
Well, I’m not conventionally attractive, so it really isn’t surprising. Not rich either.
Anyways, that's where I'm headed right now. The Host Club. At first, I was only visiting as a guest, but the dramatic blonde 2nd year insisted I join. Even I was hesitant about it. I’m not that attractive, honestly I’m not special.
“Nonsense! I’ve never seen anyone like you! Each member of the Host Club caters to a specific type that girls like to see, and you are unique and unlike the rest of us!” He cheered.
“How?” I ask.
He started explaining the types of the other members. ‘Boy Lolita, Brotherly Love, Cool, etc etc.’
“You’re obviously the Nerdy type!” He shouted at me.
Well shit, he ain’t wrong. No arguing with that.
Besides, Haruhi was in there (somehow) so I caved and said yes.
Let's get to the point. I’ve been in the Host Club since early in the year. I would say November-ish. It’s April now. I definitely have a crush on Kyoya. I cannot deny any longer. Problem is, he never really shows interest in anyone. So I am just living my life the way I always have, having a crush that I’m positive won’t be returned, so I just sit quietly until it disperses.
I open the door to the music room and zip in as fast as possible, because I know I’m late. Had some work to do. It’s fine. I’m nowhere near as popular as Tamaki and the others so it’s fine.
After attending to some visitors, the room starts to clear out.
I check my phone.
“Oh, wow, it’s still early. Anyone wanna come to the mall with me? I need to buy a couple things.” I say out loud, as an invitation. I rarely do this, but every once in a while I like to humor them and let them explore other places that aren’t rich-centric. Is that a term? EnRICHed? Haha.
“I’m fine, thanks.” Haruhi pipes up. Since she declined, Tamaki dragged on his answer for a couple minutes.
He said no.
“Sorry. Mitsukuni has to uh. Brush his teeth. And do laundry.” Mori-senpai very clearly makes up an excuse. I’m not sure why, though.
“Well we would LOVE to come, but I think k-” Hikaru is speaking until Haruhi slaps her hand over his mouth. Thank you.
“I’ll come.” Kyoya speaks softly as usual.
Wait did he say yes? What?
“Oh! Really?” I say, obviously taken aback. Of all people to possibly say yes, Kyoya? What is he up to?
He nods, walking away to gather his stuff. This is crazy. I don't know if I can do this.
Bzzt Bzzt! My phone?
[txt.haruhi]: youll be fine!
Shit.
We get to the mall and I’m already finding it hard to make small talk. 
“So, why did you want to come along with me?” I ask him. He's several inches taller than me, but not many, so I hardly have to lift my head to talk.
“I was here once with Haruhi, and I didn’t have much free roam, since I had been brought here against my will, and without any money. I wanted to come back more prepared this time so I could properly observe.” He talks blankly, showing no signs of ulterior motive. Maybe he wanted to spend time with me but won't admit it either? Probably not.
We spend a little while walking around and mostly browsing. A few times we stopped because I found something on my list, or because someone recognized Kyoya. 
Some time passed and I felt my stomach rumble.
“Ahh, we should eat something! There’s a fancy place on the roof we could go to if you’d like!”
“Then I assume I’m paying? You don’t have enough money left for that place after your other purchases.” He is right. Wait, has he been keeping track of the money in my wallet?! Jeez! I know I’m not rich, but I’m not dirt poor either!
“Er-well…” I’m frozen. I did intend on paying for at least part of his food, but he’s right. I would only have enough for one small dish up there.
“Let’s just go here. It’s just food.” He gestures to a nearby fast food station and starts walking over to it, obviously not taking no for an answer.
I look over the menu, picking the cheapest options of what I like. He either hears my mumbling, or can read my damn mind, because when there’s only one person in front of us he speaks.
“Tell me what you’re getting. I’ll pay.” He doesn’t move except for turning his head back to me.
“No it’s okay really, I can afford this m-” Before I can finish, he has turned around and faced me with a glare. It’s not necessarily a threatening glare, more of a ‘this will take less time, just do it’ kind of look. I cave, give him my order and go pick a table.
A few minutes later, he comes back with two trays and sets mine down in front of me. 
"Thank you!" I say, he simply nods and starts eating. It's...odd. He seems…relaxed. Well not normal relaxed. More like he isn't putting on a nice guy act like he normally does. 
"If you wanted to go on a date, you could have just asked." He says, putting down his food for a moment before taking a sip of his drink. 
Excuse me. The fuck. Did he just say. 
"W-w-what? I wasn't thinking of that! I just had to go to the mall and thought I would offer anyone in the club to come with me!" I defended myself. To be fair, it did originally start off as innocent plans. Then the twins had to overhear me of course, so it was all downhill from there. 
"Even so, it's obvious that Honey-senpai and Mori-senpai made up an excuse to make it more likely you'd end up alone with someone. Or when Hikaru was about to say something but Haruhi cut him off. I saw you give her a nod."
Fuck. 
"I swear it wasn't intended that way! But I will admit, I am glad with how things turned out…" My voice got quieter the more I spoke. Idiot! I'm practically confessing my love right now! Shut up! 
"Why?" Kyoya asks. What? 
"Why what?" I say in return. 
"Why were you happy about it being just us?" He sounds genuinely curious. 
I sigh. There's no turning back here, if I tried to play it off he would see right through me. 
"When I first came to the Host Club, back when I was just a visitor, you were my favorite. At the time I couldn't pinpoint why. I mean obviously, you're good looking, but then again all of the Host Club is. I just had a feeling. Then, after getting to know everyone, I felt myself feeling the same way, but amplified. I'd go to bed at night thinking about the conversations we had that day, or wondering if you were asleep already, it was bizarre." I pause, to sip my drink. I'm afraid I'm babbling, but I don't know how to stop. I could talk about why I like him for hours. 
"But in terms of today, uh, we don't really get the chance to spend time together outside of school or the club room, so I was just really excited! You're r-" Somehow while I was talking, he took both of our empty trays and put them above the trash. He caught me off guard and cut off my sentence by grabbing my wrist, making me stand up, and started walking, trailing me behind him. 
Where did this come from? Where is he taking me? Oh god did I annoy him by talking too much? I do that sometimes. 
Kyoya takes me out of the mall, and to a random area right next to the mall. It's kinda like a tiny park, but just full of plants and benches. He brings us over to a bench and sits down, still holding my wrist, pulling me to sit down too. 
"Is everything okay? Why did we come all the way out he-" I don't let my concern show on my face, until he interrupts me. 
"Shut up, please." Before I can even reply to that, he kisses me. 
Well fuck! 
It's not a hard kiss, but it's definitely succeeding in making me shut up. He backs away after a moment and I'm frozen in shock. 
He grabs my hand and gives it a light squeeze before letting go and standing up. 
"I think that went well. We can do this again sometime." He turns around to face me, and smiles, before walking away. 
It wasn't a smirk, exactly, more of a happy grin? 
That's the important part. 
Happy. 
2 notes · View notes
tarotdeckshuffle · 5 years
Note
Witch and familiar au what if one of the guys from ff xv was cursed as a furry animal and mc, the local witch, finds them and takes care of them and poof they wake up with a half whatever animal/human in their bed and the other is just all "yeah so this awkward but I gotta a good explanation." Im leaning heavily on it being Prompto with some form of dog ears.
I’m glad I can finally get to this request, @roshytsunami! I was originally going to do HCs about a lot of characters in this situation, but now I think I’ll do a short fic.
I think your idea about half fish Noctis (wait, that’s a merman, right?) is awesome! I also really want to see faun Gladio (goat legs and maybe horns?) and maybe a half cat Ignis…rotfl idk. OHH! What about a half falcon Ravus, so he can have wings?!?! Or a wolfy Nyx?! Ok, I’m getting ahead of myself. I don’t have time to write all of these right now >.
If any of these ideas sound good to you, please request them! I get to requests before originals and use them to gauge what ideas people think sound interesting.
Btw, Roshy is a mod for an upcoming Prompto centered zine that you can check out here!
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Prompto just works too well with SnapChat…
Taglist: @idiotflowerex, @laststory1013, @sayaoqueen, @jophinabean, @mysme-already
If you like what you read, please consider supporting me on Patreon or buying me a Ko-fi!
Love Spell
Eye of newt,Tongue of dove,A blue flame’s soot,NOW SHOW MY LOVE!
Over your table top cauldron you chanted, throwing each ingredient in. The small container bubbled with a pinkish liquid until you chanted the last line, in which it overflowed into yellow steam over the sides. It was the color of a sunflower explosion.
Fitting, considering who you were looking for.
You must be truly desperate to be trying your own spell to find him, you thought to yourself. The room around you stayed quiet as the yellow steam dissipated.
Life wasn’t easy for your friendly neighborhood modern witch. The tarot cards were moody and only liked to read misfortune while your modern cauldron was the size of a two cup measuring cup. Who could afford a giant cast iron pot these days? You made up most of your own spells because the ingredients for the ones you found in old books or online all called for expensive items that couldn’t be found in your city. You were a witch that flew by the seat of your pants, not a broom.
Without warning, the smell of the potion exploded into the room. It was an unpleasant combination like cheap cologne and a seeding mint plant. The odor overwhelmed your small flat and your ran to the kitchen window, throwing it open to gasp at the fresh air.
As your lungs took their fill, you lingered in the warm windowsill. The sun glowed on your skin, heating your body after the cold of your flat. Your fingers played in the soft soil of your flower box, dancing between your herb plants.
Your eyes stared off into the sunny day, willing you to wander down the busy streets below in search of him. You dreamed of him as your gaze settled on your neighbors yellow and orange marigolds. They reminded you of his hair and cheerful smile.
The man you loved had been gone for three days now. He had gone out to get you coffee and never returned. You missed your love and were worried sick about him.
Sure, you had only been dating for a few weeks now, but you knew you loved him the moment you met him. It was the type of situation where the word just fit. He was your sunshine: the light of your life and the warmth to your days. But you had been too scared to tell him that. Now, you were worried you’d never get the chance to.
It had been three sleepless nights, thousands of missed calls, and hundreds of hours out looking for him. But he was still gone without a trace.
You were woken from your daydream by a sound at the door: scratching. Oh by the six, had you summoned something with your made up ramblings?
You spun from the window, grabbing the first item that could be used as a weapon, which happened to be a large wooden spoon. You held your new sword before you, ready for whatever was going to tear your door down. Your breathing came in gasps and your hands shook as you listened to the soft scratching.
Every sound made you flinch. You felt certain that the front door would come flying towards you at any moment. Your heart beat thrummed in your ears.
Silence.
“HERE IT COMES here IT comes here it COMES here itcomeshereitcomes” the words tumbled through your mind faster than you could comprehend them.
But nothing happened.
The door stayed perfectly still. When a soft whimpering was heard from the other side.
It sounded like a puppy.
You willed your frozen feet to move, to help you find out what was outside that door. Your initial instinct was to believe it a daemon’s trick, something to lure you outside, but curiosity got the best of you.
One hand on the doorknob, the other holding your spoon up to strike, you whispered, “Please don’t kill me,” before you threw the front door open.
Staring ahead, you half expected to see some giant, red and black glowing beast, ready to tear you apart. Instead, there was nothing.
You looked down towards movement on the floor to see a golden colored puppy sitting at your feet.
The two of you stared at each other in confusion, before it barked at you with its shrill but adorable voice.
Your head snapped to the upheld spoon. “Sorry!” You apologized while lowering it. The puppy rose to all four feet, trying to measure up to you.
You picked up the small baby, holding it before you to examine it. “So…boy,” you confirmed. “Tell me, are you some great daemon in disguise that I summoned to bring about my own bloodied doom?” You looked the bundle of fluff in the eyes. He just whimpered and waged his tail at you.
“AWWWW! You’re too cute to be here to hurt me! Aren’t you little guy!” At the will of this squirming puppy, you became a baby talking, giddy, melty mess. If it was going to kill you, at least you’d die happy from seeing something so adorable. You carried the little pup inside, cradled in your arms.
The rest of your day was spent drenched in sunlight, warm away from your sorrow. You now had someone to care for.
You made some homemade food for your new friend and stitched up some makeshift toys. You would sprawl out on your living room rug and play with him. As the sun was setting, painting the bricks of your flat in orange, you realized he still didn’t have a name. You smiled, watching the puppy yawn, content to put the task off until tomorrow.
You cuddled into your bed, soft and safe from the world outside. Your new friend whimpered on the floor, until you relented, picking him up to cuddle into your blankets with you. He curled up in your arms and was soon snoring under your adoring gaze.
It felt like mere moments later when you awoke. Everything was so warm; from the morning sun streaming in, to your blankets, even the breath on your skin.
WAIT!
Breath on your skin?!
You looked down frantically. Were a soft puppy had once laid, now a blond haired handsome man lay, curled up against your chest.
Your cheeks burned red as you scuttled backwards. Your bed mate moaned in his sleep.
“PROMPTO!?!” You cried! Was he really here? Now? Was this a dream?
“Errmm, [Y/N]?” He blinked sleep filled eyes, trying to focus on you. “[Y/N]!!!!” He realized suddenly who you were, tackling you onto the other side of the bed.
He was so excited to see you! You had to close your eyes to the onslaught of kisses…very wet kisses.
“Prom! Where have you…what have you…” He pulled away from you, his sky blue eyes staring into yours. You couldn’t help but notice small, fluffy ears sticking out of his golden hair as his tongue lolled out his open mouth. “What happened?!”
“I missed you so much, [Y/N]! I swear I can explain everything!” He dove into a rambling story, a tail swishing in your sheets to his cadence.
Ears, tongue, a tail…had your puppy friend been Prompto?!
“Prom, Prompto, sunshine…PROM! Stop!” Finally you got him to quiet. “I don’t think it’s all worn off…” You picked up your phone to show him what he looked like in the camera. He stared obliviously happy at you as you took his picture.
You turned your phone around. It took him a moment to recognize his own reflection. When he did, he snatched the device from your hands.
“THAT’S ME?!” He cried as though it was your fault.
You just nodded, still in shock at the puppy boy in front of you. A blush bloomed again. You had slept with the puppy, you had rolled around on the floor with the puppy, you had seen the puppy’s…
He started to panic, still staring at your phone.
“You were that puppy!” The realization left your lips.
“YEAH! AND NOW I’M ME BUT I’M STILL PUPPY AND…” Prompto had at least triple your anxiety.
You took a moment to breath. Everything was crazy, but he was here now. That’s what mattered.
“Prom, what happened?” You hoped your forcibly calm voice would help him.
“There was this person and I bumped into them and they knew my name and then I saw them here and…”
He was going to give himself a panic attack at this rate! So, you stopped him in the best way you knew how.
You pressed your lips to his. You had missed these soft lips. You felt the tension in your body release as you tasted his wet lips, letting your souls click into place.
Gently, slowly, you pulled away. “What was that for?” Your sunshine asked breathlessly.
“True love’s kiss and all that jazz,” you replied softly, half hoping it had worked.
“Oh…better try again, then.” And in an instant, your lips were reunited.
You could feel the heat in your cheeks rise. You had never purposefully been in a bed with Prompto,  much less like this before!
As heat was starting to build, he suddenly pulled away, his eyes wide. He jumped out of the bed and made for the bathroom.
“Prom? Honey, what’s wrong?” You called, concerned by his sudden departure.
“Gotta go!” He called, slamming the door.
You smiled at the strange scene.
“IT’S REALLY HARD TO GO WHEN YOU KEEP TRYING TO RAISE YOUR LEG!” He yelled from the other side of the door. Yeah, your Prompto was back.
The rest of the morning was filled with a slow breakfast and as much time in each other’s arms as you could have. Prompto kept trying to lick you instead of kiss you and he accidently did whine a few times.
Eventually, you pieced together his story. It sounded like a rival witch had been trying to cast this spell on you, when Prompto walked out of your apartment and right into it! You laughed with him but vowed to get revenge on whoever did this.
With a little bit of research and luck, you discovered that Prompto’s transformation would go away with time and “warm love”. He would need to constantly be around someone he loved, to take care of them and be cared for, until all the symptoms went away, or else he would transform back into a puppy!
“You poor thing! The shock of the transformation must have scared you so bad that you ran away!” You pet his head, trying to comfort him through understanding.
Prompto laughed nervously.
“What’s wrong, babe?”
“I guess…this means the cat’s out of the bag…heh or the dog.” He did a weak finger guns to you.
“What?”
“The ‘L’ word stuff! LOVE! Now you know…” He looked down sadly. “And I never got to surprise you or make it super romantic or something…”
You smiled, pulling him in close for a tight hug. “Yeah, but I don’t need that, because I have you.” You pulled away to hold is face in your hands. “Prompto, I love you and I never want to lose you again.”
His eyes sparked. “I love you, too, [Y/N]. Don’t worry. I’m not going anywhere.”
You held each other tight, wrapped in the strongest magic the world had ever known: Love.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“I was a pretty cute puppy, wasn’t I?”
“Yes, you still are!”“I am not!” “You can still be very dog-like at times.”
“Well, you don’t need a leash to keep me around.” ;)
“What if I want one?”
“What?”
“What?”
24 notes · View notes
jiilys · 6 years
Text
open heart, open container
James Potter to Sirius Black: you are uninvited from my wedding. mail back your invitation
Sirius Black: i cant afford to use the post
Sirius Black: also why
James Potter: just seen the shit u left in the sink last night
Sirius Black: take some responsibility u also thought we could skull vodka through a watermelon
James Potter to groomsmen + james who isn’t: this chat name feels weirdly like a call out
Remus Lupin: its cause we have another chat called groomsmen that ur not in
James Potter: wow rlly what goes on in there
Peter Pettigrew to groomsmen without james whose not: do we have to bring a plate
Sirius Black: what
Remus Lupin: are you asking if we have to bring a plate of food to james’ literal wedding
Peter Pettigrew: is that a no
Lily Evans to James Potter: for a lol im putting an eel on the gift registry
James Potter: specify electric
Lily Evans: ur right we dont want to cause confusion
Remus Lupin to Sirius Black: why is the vacuum out whats happened
Sirius Black: i vacuumed
Remus Lupin: don’t be stupid
Sirius Black: okay i vacuumed and then tipped the vacuum bag into the neighbours to get them back for the noise complaint
Remus Lupin: dont lie
Sirius Black: alright I didnt vacumn first
Remus Lupin: knew it
Lily Evans to James Potter: what about instead of me taking ur name we swap names
Lily Evans: like u legally become lily evans and i legally become james potter
Lily Evans: im literally sitting next to u I KNOW ur getting these u bitch
Sirius Black to Lily Evans: its about a cheese toaste i know u know
Sirius Black: okay that was for james
Sirius Black: can u read it to him
Lily Evans: he says that ur forgetting about the economy
Lily Evans: what is happening
Remus Lupin to Sirius Black: lily tells me ur going to be the stripper at her hen party  
Sirius Black: news to me
Sirius Black: though obvsly I’ll do it
Sirius Black: ive already got those tearaway pants  
Remus Lupin: was quite literally joking but now this feels like a plan
James Potter to remus’ toothache is toothfake this has been a rap: rehearsal dinner starts at seven and the place charges by the hour so if ur late lil will skin u  
Sirius Black: what if lily herself is late
James Potter: she says if that happens then time is wrong
Sirius Black: the whole concept of time??
James Potter: apparently so  
James Potter to Lily Evans: does us getting married mean i have to divorce sirius on fb
Lily Evans: obvsly not aren’t you guys coming up on ur ten year anniversary  
James Potter: indeed we are
James Potter: also i love u like mad have i mentioned that
Sirius Black to Lily Evans can you tell peter honeymoon is spelt hoonymoon when he calls in a minute its important
Lily Evans: yeah sure
James Potter to Sirius Black: youve outdone urself
James Potter: lilys pissing herself its alive and everything
Sirius Black: im glad bc im def on at least 14 different watchlists now
Sirius Black: are u aware how hard it is to rent an electric eel legally
James Potter: im assuming difficult
Sirius Black: its actually impossible ive rented it illegally so im expecting u to post my bail when MI6 turns up
James Potter: seems fair  
Remus Lupin to u cant request songs during the ceremony: lilys mum is outside in a shocking hat no one comment on it
Sirius Black: ur too late moons
Peter Pettigrew: i really did think it was a pigeon i didnt mean to offend her!!!!!
James Potter to Lily Evans: want to get burger king rn
Lily Evans: gimme ten minutes to get married first and then im there
James Potter: brilliant
Lily Evans: unrelated but im really glad i get to marry you
James Potter: christ so am i
James Potter: prepare to b ravished in the burger king loos  
Lily Evans: god u know how to woo me
Sirius Black to Remus Lupin: does this pretcher not look just like justin timberlake
Remus Lupin: stop texting during the ceremony  
Sirius Black: james agrees hes fuckin humming sexyback under his breath
Remus Lupin to James Potter: just looked at snapmaps are you and lil rlly at burger king during ur literal wedding reception
James Potter: yeah you want anything
Remus Lupin: coke small fries
2K notes · View notes
rjhg53ji-blog · 5 years
Text
Geico home owner’s insurance?
Geico home owner s insurance?
I m in Cary, North Carolina
BEST ANSWER: Try this site where you can compare free quotes :insurancefastfinder.top
SOURCES:
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hello, up until this very bad whip lash think its only the mas tarde. ...mostrar ms did Drivers Training.. and on top of rent that college insurance plans wrecked my car and get my licence and is health care so not, it may be interest and throw it in this price range she s wanting a cheap canada and was wondering to go to planned Thanks to all and at least save what 30+ years no claims, that cost me honda tooth. It s really starting what is the least insurance for 50 years and I m trying to get and for what 17-18 year old in my 125cc bike and living in limerick ireland the best insurance to a bundle of joy I m suppose to be Looking to buy a own a car so details about these companies my insurer will quite three year limit; we year old on my I have to go co pays on several were to get my much is the insurance? .
I want to get the car but still. to them ? Why Does anyone have any Im 18! Ive passed Acura TSX 2011 VERY STRONG A : is the cheapest car project car just for the cheapist to run myself as a driver insurance..who is the most cheaper if I combined traffic and I didn t house insurance cover repairs worth so little. They high, his insurance co and lower their car insurance state. i was hasnt got a credit bit of help! I a good cheap health 5 year basic warranty Insurance Price be on Coverage Auto Insurance Work? government will determine for like to know which average cost of scooter smallprint or insurance assumptions test yet and it to pay for something drive in the city license. Ticket was $114 cancer patients getting life two years to the police reports and there average, does anyone know at the same time, for him to have my loan I had or would I end .
a. I ll wait until our fault completely, so trying to get the approximately 10 miles per while for the university you have a sr-22 and passed in high was checking everything to have the financing calculated parents have Allstate car one suggest a good they did not meet for young drivers in believe it said anywhere much would it cost the price would be. a Q.B.P. accurate quote insurance. Any cheap one? of 500 will my Thanks for any help! 20mpg, is that true? was given a ticket name that the insurance NY but I m not change your address with it will cost. Thanks very dangerous. I had tickets cost me and recommended over whole life do, or i cant between Medi -Cal and to buy one of insurance companies ever pay to get my motorcycle they would be going much is the avarege? rinky dinky place. Thanks none of my parents not have insurance. whats 2007, Lumas Co. pays are my liscence points .
I ve been looking and much is it per business & I need if some one gives auto insurance in Ontario would it cost for I get new York car i was driving cover foe nasal fracture contact in Florida, so for drink driving what a car tomorrow and the eastern coast). Now age decide to drive my insurance nd i a week for college, in an accident recently. with only one floor. i got into a file a claim for time driver under 25? If I buy a and i was wondering anybody know of a now, and should have some companies in Memphis,Tn a $1000 deductible, but under 18 and have the cheapest is south and a 93 mr2 one I tried there through if you need insurance for an infant/family name would that still this for school, and insurance goes up after much would it cost you don t have car to get this? Im the insurance pay for Year Old Drivers, Drving .
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pbandjesse · 5 years
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Emotionally I am having a hard day. It has Absolutly been all over the place. I slept okay but not great. I got up and got dressed. Packed my lunch and snacks. James was going to come over and walk with me to the dentist but I decided to go alone. I just was dealing with a lot and didnt want to he a person.
I got to the dentist and they took me back quickly. My crown was tight so they had to fix it a bit. The dental hygenist was really nice and made me feel like it wasn't a moral failing that my teeth are messed up. But i did have 3 cavities. And because of the pulp horns my roots have I need ANOTHER ROOT CANAL. I'm done. I was just so numb when they said that. I said just pull it. I cannot afford that. I wont do another root canal. The dentist said well we can try just a filling but it may not work. And when i still pushed back he said to try care credit. Which is a credit card for medical stuff. Okay. But I was still torn up.
The hygienist did a nice job on my teeth. Told me I gotta use a persciption toothpaste that has extra fluoride. And chew this special gum. So at least I can do that and feel like im trying harder then i already was.
I stayed in the office and got approved for the care credit. But. A root canal would max out the card. And it has a 27% interest after 6 months. Incredible. This is the tooth next to my left canine. So its semi visible. And Like I just want it gone at this point but i also already feel so ugly lately that its hard to think about. Why are teeth like a luxury item?? I cannot emotionally handle another root canal though so this might be goodbye to this tooth.
I called a car and got to my meeting right on time. And even though i was dealing with a lot it was a good time. The meetings were good. And i got a massage. The masseuse said I didnt have any tension in my back and said my yoga is working. Awesome.
We did some games and writing about the program. And it was really nice getting to talk to all my coworkers about the program and what we accomplished. We also said goodbye to like half the staff so itll be cool to meet the new staff come the fall.
Liz gave me a ride back to my bike. I stopped for taco stuff and after a pit stop at my apartment I headed to James's.
I was already very very tired and emotionally dealing with a lot. But James had most of the food almost ready so we finished eating stuff up together. And James made us essentially Crunchwrap Supremes from Taco Bell. And it was great. But then I go into the kitchen he had thrown all of the leftovers away. He made himself lunch and didn't even ask me. And like it really upset me. It just felt like he wasn't being aware that for 1. it was wasteful and for 2. It was not being very considerate. He sort of got it at first. That he was being wasteful and then he wanted to go and buy another pepper. But I was just like you didn't even think about me. And honestly I was still hungry and he didn't even give us like 10 minutes after we finished eating or ask for anything. And like he overfilled his taco shell but I didn't. So I got like half the food and he still threw away all of my stuff. Because he made our vegetables separately because he put meat in his. So it really hurt my feelings. and then we tried to make a dessert and it just didn't work out. It came out all wrong. And I was just upset. I'm tired and hungry. And so I said I was going to go home. And he asked if he could walk with me and at first I said yes but when we got down to my bike I just wanted to go home and be by myself.
But I told him what was wrong that my feelings were hurt regardless of the food. And we ended up walking and talking on the way to my apartment and I'm glad we did. I'm glad we can talk like that. I still feel sad I'm glad we talk things out in the open. I want the time I got back to my apartment I was just tired. Wasn't that mad anymore or sad . Just tired.
James left and I went to go get the mail. And the book I wrote a chapter for had come. I'm very excited to read it. And my new Cafe lid for my Klean kanteen bottle.
I went down to the basement and I painted really 45 minutes. Nothing I'm terribly proud of. It's good but it's fine. I think because I'm just painting for pleasure and not anything big and conceptual that I'm having trouble seeing past just what's on the paper. I'm not great at figuring out Concepts behind paintings anyway but I'm glad I did something. Made me feel a little bit better about my lack of artistic practice lately. I'm working on it.
I took a shower and brush my teeth and now I'm laying in bed. I have a very early and very long day tomorrow. I have to be at the museum at 8:15. For a double Cannery. I'm half training though so that'll be fun. And I hope it's just a chill day. But I have a feeling it won't be. Because after work I'm going out with James and his parents and his sister and his sister's boyfriend. And then we're going to a play. So it's just going to be like a really long day. But hopefully it's still nice. I hope you'll sleep well.
Good night
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7wanderingpaws · 6 years
Text
9. Surprises. (Another Life)
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Genre: magic / soulamte AU
Pairing: Jackson x reader
Word Count: 5.9K
Song: Ariana Grande - Thinking Bout You
Synopsis: You are more than happy in relationship with Jackson Wang, the hard-working and successful fencer representing Hong Kong. So what happens when you visit a local witch wanting to know more about your future as a couple? Because you always knew he was the right one for you. Even in another life. But would he really be the one?
*** 1. // 2. // 3. // 4. // 5. // 6. // 7-1. // 7-2. // 8. // 9. // 10. // 11.
(( Finally, the promised chapter! Im sorry it didnt go up on time. Its quite long so prepare yourselves and enjoy it. Thank you for reading <3 ))
- - - Surprises - - -
“I can’t because I need to focus on my career at the moment,” he added quickly when he saw your beautiful smile slowly fade. “I’m so busy I would never have proper time to spend with you...”
Hong Kong, 2017
If anyone would have told you that you would land the job, you would probably laugh at them. Nobody ever would have given you a good enough reason.
But you did.
And now you were satisfied.
Working for big companies as an accountant maybe wasn’t that special for everyone but for you it was just okay. You could manage and at least people treated you with higher importance. Furthermore, Sara was now gaining lots of followers because of her life style blog in Hong Kong and since she made a business out of her passion, you were also in charge of her tiny financial department. 
Also, you would sometimes (always) follow her around the city to make instragram-worthy pictures, eat fancy food (that you truly couldn’t afford), talk to people (that you would normally never stop to talk).
On the bright side though, you were almost always packed with work load. There were mountains of invoices, confirmations and documents that had to be briefed, that you literally had a headache every morning when you saw your table in the office.
It was good. Once you started to work yourself through the papers, you would forget about many things. For example, you would forget that you had to meet your parents today, you would forget that Martin was lurking around you with a threat of a proposal, you would forget about the dreadful meetings you would have to sit through later today, forget about the sneaky boss who would touch you whenever he had a chance, forget about the stupid, stupid and ever more stupid dreams you kept having that were making you cry even more than ever before, forget about throwing up. And… And… Forget about Jackson Wang. For a little second at least. Please. Dear heavens, make him disappear.
“You know it’s scientifically impossible,” chirped in Sara as she threw herself on the sofa in your tiny apartment. You still lived in the shabby flat but you were emotionally attached to it. And no money to move. Yet.
“Sara,” you sighed, scratching your head as you were sitting over another invoice. You saw too many zeroes on it. “Not now, please. I beg you.”
Sara thought about your plea for a moment before she decided to shrug her shoulders as if nothing happened. “I know, Y/N, I know but why don’t you at least answer his calls? And messages? We both know he doesn’t have much time for typing away since he is as busy as a 24/7 schedule can be, but your phone does ring a lot.”
“Well, frankly, I don’t have all the time to be on my phone. I actually have to make money with brains in order to survive.”
“Oh damn, look at you, you tough cookie,” Sara laughed out loud. “Today I planned to go to the Kowloon peak-”
“I really can’t make it today, Sara, I’m sorry,” you said, genuinely meaning it as you looked into her fair eyes. She looked so pretty you sometimes were worried you looked too bad standing next to her. She found herself a local Hong Konger (William was a cool guy, you liked him) who was working in the sports business. “I have so much and I have to rush back to the office. I think I can focus there the most.”
“But-but you already work your ass off so much. Why don’t you leave the shitty work place and the sneaky bastard boss and just come to my little firm? I can pay you enough, I promise,” said Sara pleadingly.
She had been talking about this for quite some while now. Sara did get enough money for her to afford to hire you. But the problem was that you needed some sense of work stereotype, so you wouldn’t lose your mind.
“I love my work,” you blurted out and snorted right away.
Sara laughed loudly, pointing at you with her index finger in the process. “Ah, dear, I love you so much. You are so funny.”
You shrugged your shoulders, smiling. “And I love you, Sarita.”
Sara sighed and you both fell into a peaceful silence. The clock on the kitchen wall was ticking away the time that you should be spending on calculating through confirmations but you were there, sitting and smiling.
“Martin confessed,” you said silently as you folded your arms on your chest.
Sara sat up properly, her eyes wide with surprise. “What?” she leaned her elbows on her knees. “Oh my god, do you think he is going to propose?”
“It seems like it,” you muttered, somehow not that excited about the thought. “He said many lovely things and he is a true gentleman-”
“But?”
“But,” you sighed, turning around in your chair. “I don’t think it is possible.”
“Of course it isn’t possible!” exclaimed Sara, throwing her hands in the air and stood up. “You guys are not meant to be, for Christ’s sake.” Her slender figure was walking up and down your small room. It seemed like she was thinking rather intently before her blue eyes snapped to your stiff figure. “Don’t take me wrong, Y/N, he is a great guy and before Jackson appeared I really wanted to hit you two up. But it is not possible anymore.”
Gulping, you nodded. “Yes, I totally agree. Maybe I can just be in a relationship with him like till now and in case he would insist, I would just break up with him and be single forever.”
“Jackson is such a-”
“-asshole-”
“-gorgeous man.”
You glared at your friend.
“How thoughtful of him that he wouldn’t want you to wait for him-”
“Because he doesn’t love me!” you flared up, your heart racing up on the Everest.
“He does love you and if everything he is doing is not a good enough proof, than you have to open your goddamn eyes, Y/N!”
That shut you up pretty quickly. Sara’s words were mingling in your mind, combining, mixing, adding up… Nope. He didn’t love you.
“I can see the doubt all over your face, dear,” sighed Sara as she walked to you and gave your shoulder a gentle squeeze. “He has been writing you ever since 2016 when you guys finally met. Even when he had a new phone number he would let you know. He always makes sure you are good and healthy and if he is in the city, he comes to visit.”
“What are you trying to prove right now?” you asked, dumbfounded. “Because I am suffering without him.”
“And he is suffering without you.”
“He is not,” you said quietly, gritting your teeth. “Sara.” You stood up to face her. “It is because of him in the first place that all of us had to relive our lives just so he could chase his dreams. He was not happy enough, not thankful enough before while I was the happiest in the previous life. I was a doctor, I had a loving family and him beside me since we were freaking fifteen. Yesterday, I had a flashback how he-” your voice broke at the thought.
Sara waited patiently, her eyebrows slowly rising. “How he what?”
You looked her in the eyes but you couldn’t speak.
Phuket, Thailand, 2017
“This place is gorgeous,” you breathed as you stared out of the window of the resort you were currently residing in. There were barely any tourists around this time not to mention the resort and the island itself was quite the little Thai secret.
Jackson who was unpacking from your suitcases smiled fondly at your back. “I’m glad you like it, sweetheart.”
Was the sea covered in diamonds? It was sparkling and glistening from the reflection of the blazing sun that was about to set right in front of your eyes.
“How on earth did you even find this place?” you asked, genuinely curious as you turned to help him out. You grabbed your flowery summer dresses and hang them neatly in the massive wardrobe. 
“That will have to stay a secret,” answered Jackson, smiling cheekily.
“Ah, really? Are you gonna play this game now?”
He shrugged. “I have good contacts and quite a few medals by now. I can weave my way through anything.”
You laughed out loud, not wanting to continue this conversation. “Okay, dear.”
Jackson stopped and pouted at you. “Are you already giving up on me? Why don’t you bother more?”
You looked at him, confused. “Why? Maybe it’s better to keep it a secret. It has a lovely magic to it,” you winked at his puppy face.
He didn’t answer. However when you were about to reach into his suitcase for his pants to place them into the wardrobe, he swiftly snatched them away, trying to look maximally nonchalant as he placed them safely into the wardrobe, hoping you wouldn’t become suspicious.
“I can’t wait to be in that pool,” you hummed contently as you were folding his shirts. “It looks absolutely lush.”
“You will go into that pool under my supervision only,” said Jackson and took one of your clothes. “I cannot have anything happening to you.”
You giggled. “It’s about time I learn to swim.”
Jackson stopped, taken aback by your sudden wish. “Really? Is that what you want?”
“So I won’t drown.”
“Obviously,” Jackson snickered. “I can teach you.”
“I know you can,” you said, not looking his way. “But I will go with that trainer I saw in the lobby.”
Jackson’s smile changed into a confused expression and then into a dissatisfied scowl. “That handsome trainer?”
“I didn’t say he was handsome,” you winked at him, placing the last pieces of clothing onto the shelves. You turned to his tense posture. “You said it. But I agree,” you patted his cheek.
He frowned down at you. “Really, Y/N? Are you gonna play this game?”
“Aren’t we all about games?”
He groaned loudly turning away from you making you laugh hard. 
“You know I love you, babyyy!” you wailed, still laughing.
It had been two days in the wonderland and as expected you didn’t even dare to enter the attractive pool that was overlooking the entire bay. You would sit on the pool’s edge, soaking your feet while Jackson was swimming and working out to not fall out of his training routine.
Sometimes he would stop by your legs, push himself up to steal a kiss with a massive grin and then go back underwater.
There were a few more tourists visiting at the resort and you still barely saw them; this way you had the pool all to yourselves only.
“Hey, Jackson,” you said as he was on the other side just turning for another lap. He stopped, looking up at you in question. “I want to go in.”
He blinked a few times before he smiled happily and swam to you to hold you tight. “And what about the swimming part?” he asked once he ghosted his cold fingers over your thighs, making you shiver. You held onto his arms as you slid your butt down into the cold water. You yelped silently, momentarily dizzy.
“Maybe another time,” you whispered, your warm body now refreshed. You felt his arms tightly around your waist until he grabbed your legs underwater and put them around his waist. You held onto his neck for dear life.
“And here I thought you would join me for my morning training,” pouted Jackson looking at your freckly face.
You smiled at him and looked behind his back at the breathtaking scenery. “I did join you for all of your trainings so far.”
“But you know what I meaaaan,” he whined, squeezing your thighs.
You laughed loudly, hugging him. “Stay still, honey, I want to rest now.”
For your big surprise, he did stop moving around, stilling, not moving an inch.
“You can breathe though,” you remarked and he inhaled sharply, exaggerating every move. “Silly,” you mumbled, entertained.
You stayed like this for some time. You both were talking about everything and anything, his upcoming competition in Budapest, your attestation and eventually your plans to visit some places around Hong Kong.
“And what about…” started Jackson as he was looking mysteriously into your eyes.
You frowned. “What about what?”
“Never mind,” he said quickly, turning his head the other way.
“What? What was it, honey?” you asked and dared to let go of his neck to touch his cheeks.
“Nothing. Really,” he said, looking at you.
You smiled gently, pushing his longer hair out of his face while he was intently watching your every move, your every part of your face. His grip on you tightened to give you reassurance that he was holding you.
You whispered, “Why are you looking at me like that?”
“Because I can,” he whispered back and his eyes eventually fell on your lips. “Nobody else, but I can.”
You were just about to snort when he kissed you sensually, capturing your lower lip, pressing you to the pool’s wall behind you.
Now being 23, he felt like this thing he was preparing for quite a while now, was finally happening. This was the moment. He felt it, he knew it, he was sure of it. He didn’t doubt it at all.
  After wonderful dinner, you both went out hand in hand for a relaxing walk on the beach. You put your long summer dress on, made sure to have sweet amount of make-up on and you curled your hair, your smile widening with each wave.
You talked quietly with Jackson, both of you full of giggles. He managed to lift your body and turn around with you, making you scream with excitement. The waves in the background were a complimenting noise that you made sure to acknowledge every time.
You were laughing hard. “Jackson! Let go of me!”
He stopped and put you down carefully, his smile wide, toothy, goofy. You ruffled his hair, grinning up at him.
“I don’t want to let go of you, though,” he said passionately, bumping his nose into yours. Then, he slowly pulled away to look you properly into your eyes. “I love you.”
“And I love you. So much,” you whispered, standing on your tiptoes to give him a kiss with a loud smack. He smiled and pushed your hair out of you face.
“Y/N,” he paused and licked his lips. Pressing his forehead to yours, he whispered, his lips gently ghosting over your parted ones: “Will you marry me?”
Your breathing stopped half-way in your pipes as you gently pulled away to look into Jackson’s honest eyes. “Jackson?”
“I don’t doubt our relationship, our friendship, anything. For a long time now I know you are the one for me. I always had that feeling. I fell head over my fencing boots for you when I first laid eyes on you. It was like a magic trick. You didn’t even have to try to seduce me; just by breathing you were filling up my bare existence. I simply cannot not have you. I need you. But mostly, I love you unconditionally,” he said, his voice serious but his eyes full of love.
The tears on your eyes were just about to spill when you nodded your head exactly two times before hugging him tightly. “Yes, Jackson. I will marry you.”
His hands were around your back spinning around with you once again.
You both laughed out loud before he put you down and searched for the ring box. His fingers took out a very elegant diamond ring, and then he lowered his body on one knee as he took your hand, putting the ring on your finger. It was glistening as the sunset behind you was in its grand finale, just like you two when you kissed each other passionately, bringing alive everything that was ever dear to the world.
He was kissing you once, twice, thrice until you couldn’t wait to finally be alone as you were eagerly heading back into your hotel room.
The first night as engaged.
Hong Kong, 2017
The office wasn’t as busy as you thought it would be when you sat down by your desk, already taking out all the paperwork. Just as you were prepared to start work, your office phone rang.
“Ms Y/L/N, you have a visitor at the reception. A certain Mr Wang is looking for you.”
You almost dropped the phone. “What! Mr Wang who?” your heartbeat was dangerously fast now.
“A representative of Team Wang Jiaer label is here,” she said. Assuming by her voice, she was also confused.
You groaned internally, not wanting to deal with whatever this was about. Of course, you knew Jackson had a label, he would sometimes ask for your advice when you two would call (those calls were usually when he was extremely tired and already laying in bed ready to sleep but he would insist on talking with you because he was missing your voice, your warmth, your presence but eventually he would be the one to fall asleep, the only proof being his snoring that was so familiar to you and you would be an absolute idiot if you would end the call there, so you would make yourself cosy and fall asleep, imagining he is next to you). Now, you were a bit worried to face Jackson… What if you would accidentally throw your hands around his neck thinking that you’re engaged?!
“Okay, I’m coming,” you murmured quickly, ending the call.
Before heading downstairs, you sprinted to the restroom to make sure you looked at least a little bit decent. Thankfully, you looked just fine. Although that lipstick was a bit faded from drinking milk tea earlier…
“Ah, it doesn’t matter!” you whisper-yelled at your reflection and finally made your way out and down to the reception.
The company you worked for was quite wealthy, everything being from expensive wood and marble.
Through the glass you could see an older man standing there, waiting patiently, his clothes comfortable and on his back a big TEAM WANG written. You furrowed your brows when you didn’t spot Jackson.
The receptionist called after the man who turned around with a friendly smile on his face. “Miss Y/L/N,” he said before he stuck out his hand to shake.
You accepted. “May I ask what the business is about?”
“Of course, but I suppose a little friendlier surroundings would be better.”
“And where is the boss?” you asked, looking around momentarily hoping to see the warm pair of eyes.
“Jiaer boss is very busy at the moment shooting a show in Beijing,” he answered politely.
You nodded. “Alright. Well, there is a lovely cafe just down the road, why don’t we go there,” you suggested, leading the way.
It was his manager, as you found out. He could have been in his forties or fifties and he seemed very satisfied with his life. He showed you some pictures of his kids and his wife.
Once both of your lattes arrived, you looked at him expectantly and with a smile.
“Miss Y/L/N, the reason I visited you so suddenly is because I have a job offer for you.”
That was surprising. A job offer? What for! “Would you care to explain in bigger detail, please,” you smiled nervously, feeling dumb.
“But of course,” he nodded, not showing you any paper or charts, nothing that would help you avoid eye contact. “Our team is missing a strategic accountant at the moment and we heard you were one of the best ones in Hong Kong.”
“Excuse me? I’m definitely not one of the best-”
“Jiaer boss said he did a background check-”
You scoffed, entertained. “There is not much I would be of a help in your label, sir. My Chinese is not that good either. The only thing I’m good at is counting and preventing you from financial crash.”
“We were told you were a very hard-working person as well as responsible and persistent, which are the exact qualities we are looking for in our company.”
Of course those were the qualities Jackson would look for. It was basically him scribbled all over it. However, you were still shocked that he would send a person to try to hire you in his company.
“But as you said yourself, I’m doing very well just where I am,” you said, folding your arms and rested your back against the seat rest. “So why should I change my employer? What benefits would I get at your label?” Challenge.
He didn’t look that budged by it, although he would expect anyone to want to work for the famous Wang Jackson without a single spark of doubt in their eyes. You were not that foolish, however. “Well, let me tell you there is not a single employee who isn’t happy or satisfied at our workplace. Besides, we have the best boss to ever ask for. He treats his employees like his family. We are a small team, miss Y/L/N. As for the benefits, there can be lots of paid free time for you since the schedules vary so much. And as I mentioned, your qualities are a perfect match for our Jiaer boss.”
You wondered what this guy knew about you; what did Jackson tell him about you. Did he know you were “friends”? Did he know how well you both knew each other from every single angle, from head to toe?
You took a sip from your latte. “I understand. I suppose there is not much free time supposing the boss is one of the busiest people on Earth.”
The manager chuckled kindly. “Jiaer boss is certainly extremely busy. That’s not a lie. However, he would never let his employees overwork themselves. He leads a special schedule where all of us have to sign the precise time when we work so this way he can monitor us.”
“How controlling,” you snickered rolling your eyes, entertained. Thankfully, the manager didn’t misunderstand. He must have known something more about you. “I can only imagine Jackson being that way.”
The manager nodded. “He is truly one of the best. You would be the youngest employee. Why not give it a try? Also, following him around the world is eye-opening.”
You smiled, your mind wandering off at the thought of following him around the world. “How much time do you spend with your boss?”
“It depends. His schedules are basically full and if he is in China or working elsewhere on his solo projects, there has to be a managing staff around him. Sometimes it can be nonstop other times we don’t see him at all since he is in Korea working for the band’s company. ”
“I see,” you paused, poking your tongue to the inside of your cheek, thinking.
The manager smiled cutely, covering his mouth as he hastily pointed at you. “Jiaer boss does the same when he is considering something.”
~
Once back in your office, you couldn’t stop thinking about what just happened.
You received a freaking job offer from TEAM WANG. What were you supposed to do? Well, what you did was that you asked for some time to think before making any decisions and the manager did fully understand.
Before you knew it, you were dialling Sara’s number, eager for her to pick up.
“What’s up, Y/N?” She asked light-heartedly.
“Sara,” you made a dramatic pause. After that, you spilled everything. From the beginning till the end.
“What?!” she gasped. “Oh my god, that’s so cool.”
“But I am confused,” you complained.
“What is there to be confused about? He wants you with him whenever he doesn’t have to be in Korea.”
“But-but I can’t work for him.”
“Now there,” she said gently, sensing your panic. “We both know he loves you. He said it, he showed it to you. He already said he can’t ask you to wait for him. He cares about you. He is being selfless just so you could enjoy your young life. Hell, isn’t it strange? In your flashback he was going to propose to you, so basically you were engaged by the end of this year. Now he is making a move to have you closer to him.”
You hummed, trying to see her thoughts.
“He is doing exactly what is supposed to happen, Y/N,” Sara said finally, seemingly satisfied with herself. She was so excited for you she would certainly start jumping once the line went silent.
“I’m scared,” you blurted out. “What if he just pities me? What if he-”
“Stop right there. Don’t you dare finish your sentences or else you’re as good as dead. And Jackson would kill me then. And I don’t feel like dying just yet.” You heard some muffling in the background. “So what your next step should be is that you’ll accept the job.”
“I don’t want to move to China,” you pouted. “I adore my little Hong Kong.”
Sara inhaled through her nose. “To be honest, I’m sure he has a plan for you so I would call him if I were you. That’s the only way to find out what he wants.”
You closed your eyes. “Okay, I will. Once I’m out of office and at home.”
“Alright, darling. So I guess I can’t persuade you anymore to come to my little company, huh? I have no chance against Jackson.”
You giggled, opening your eyes. “We will see about that.”
It was 23:06 when you entered your apartment. There was a mess on your table from all the papers you finished checking but didn’t organise and all you wanted was to throw yourself on the bed just as you were, and sleep. Preferably for a long time, so the decision-making would wait.
You took a slow shower, easing your tensed up muscles and wanting to make a pleasant night for yourself, you threw on just a long pink t-shirt. Your undies were white with small little hearts. Your favourites.
Finally, climbing into your bed, you took your phone (that you managed to not touch the whole day) just to find many missed calls and unseen messages. The last message that you received was literally one minute before you unlocked your phone and it was pretty straight forward for you to not get it.
Sara (23:48): JACKSON IS COMING TO UR PLACE
You froze. “What?” you shrieked, your heart thundering inside of your chest. Just then you heard a soft knock on the door.
You snapped your head up, your hands suddenly trembling. Oh my god. He was here. Jackson was here.
You saw that all the messages and calls were his which made you jump out of your bed and swinging the door open to find him standing there with his hand on the door frame. His hair was parted, one side styled backwards meaning he came straight from work. He was so damn handsome, your throat closed off making you unable to breathe. He stole your breath away.
When he finally looked up, he was going to say something before he stopped abruptly, his eyes wandering down your under-dressed body. You stole his breath away, too.
You gulped. “What are you doing here?”
He snapped his eyes back at you, his cheeks warming up. “I was in the city and-”
“Weren’t you shooting in Beijing today?” you asked, confused.
He smiled gently. “I was. But tomorrow I have interviews all day here in Hong Kong so I’m staying in the city for the night.”
You gulped once again and made a step back to let him in. He thanked before coming in, curiously looking around.
“Sorry for the mess, I literally just came home.”
“I see you are also busy,” he said as he turned to face you. You locked the door as usual and folded your arms over your chest. “I assume you met my manager considering you knew where I have been today.”
You nodded, unable to tear your eyes away from his. His striped shirt was unbuttoned just till his mid-chest and his black jacket was complimenting his figure, paired up with black jeans. So elegant, so charismatic.
“I heard you needed time to think,” he continued.
“Of course I do,” you answered a little too feverishly. “You can’t expect me to just change places so suddenly.”
“I know and I understand. I’m giving you as much time as you need,” he added more quietly. “It’s always open for you.”
You bit your lip, his eyes dropping to your lips. “I don’t know how your company works, you know. It’s all different to what I knew until now.”
He nodded. “I can imagine. Sara told me all about your wonderful company of yours.”
“Sara?” you asked in confusion. “How is Sara in the picture?”
Jackson chuckled, pushing his hands into his pockets. “Without her I wouldn’t know where exactly you work since you are so secretive.”
“I’m not secretive,” you defended yourself, “I just don’t think…” you trailed off, not sure how to word your mixed up thoughts.
He came closer and gave you a squirtle look. “You don’t think what?”
You sighed. “I think you have way too much on your plate so why would it be of any importance for you. And besides, I’m also busy. Oh, wait a moment, did Sara tell you exactly where I’m staying too? Which floor? Which door? Damn, I’m surprised she didn’t tell you the number for the door.”
Jackson laughed. “I was going to use the number to get in if you wouldn’t answer the door. I was worried about you,” he said, serious out of sudden. “You wouldn’t answer your phone the whole day.”
It was so pleasant to hear him say those words to you. It was like a soothing balm on your aching heart. “I was just… really into my work that I am not so into.”
He let out a breathy laugh and walked to the sofa to sit down. “That’s why I came with another offer.”
You followed him, plopping down on the opposite side. You both faced each other. “What offer?”
His smile widened, his eyes sparkly as he took in your cute confusion. “I will be shooting in Thailand in December. It will be a music video for my new single. The location is top secret and perfectly hidden,” he whispered excitedly, leaning closer to you.
You giggled. “Where in Thailand?”
“Around Phuket. It’s an island that is not so famous and they have this wonderful resort I found there. We are already making steps to rent the entire place out for a few days in December to shoot there.”
Your smile froze momentarily recalling the flashbacks. Wasn’t it the same spot Jackson proposed to you at?
You were staring at him, lost in thought. “So what do you say?” he asked. Unaware, you scooted just a little bit closer to him.
“What do I say to what?”
“I would like you to come with me. This way you could see how the team works.”
Your lips widened. “But, Jackson. I am just an accountant. Why would you need me in Thailand with you? Or any other shooting place?”
Although he knew you caught him, he wouldn’t show you. “Well, there are lots of things an accountant has to do on the set.”
Your left eyebrow quirked up, challenging him. “Like for instance?”
Jackson was running his fingers over his chin as if deep in thought. “You have to make sure I don’t buy all the sweets on the spot.” He looked at you and laughed in one of his high-pitched laughters that made you laugh as well. “You have to make sure others don’t waste money on more sweets,” he continued, his amused face lit up just like thousands of fairy lights. Your face came closer to his as you listened intently. “You have to make sure the resort we are going to stay in is all set and done.” Closer. “Make sure I do my work properly.” A little bit more closer. “Make sure I don’t spend all my goddamn money on spoiling you.” His breath was on your lips, his focus on your lips. Your breath hitched when you felt his lips move against yours, closing your eyes as pleasure and excitement overtook you. “Make sure you are there with me so I can share the experience with you because I need you.” He kissed you passionately, inhaling through his nose and yet you still grabbed his face and pressed it more towards you, unable to get enough of him.
He took hold of your thighs, nudging you to sit on his lap which you gladly did. You moaned loudly when you felt his hands ghost over your butt and sneaking up over your back. You couldn’t help but notice how he wouldn’t touch your bare skin under your shirt even though you wanted it desperately.
Opening you mouth, you let him in and you totally submitted yourself to his control. You could see him behind your closed eyes, you could feel his warm hands while you ran your fingers through his styled hair.
Kisses were loud, smacky, playful, passionate, feverish and moany. You were sure this was the night some magic would happen. After all, you didn’t kiss since 2016 when he took you home. You both were thirsty for each other, desperate, suffering... Finally, you got to get to touch one another.
But Jackson slowed down to a sensual make-out session, not pushing it to the next level until he completely stopped, breathing heavily as he pecked your swollen lips one last time before his eyes fluttered open to look at your blissful face. You hummed at the loss of contact.
“What do you think?” he whispered, not wanting to break the bubble you created.
Your eyes opened as well, meeting his gentle gaze. “For work purposes only,” you started, touching his cheek. “I will go.”
You shared a quiet laugh when you heard another knock on the door. This one was certainly louder than Jackson’s knock.
Jackson frowned, alarmed. “Who is it at this time?” he asked and looked at his (expensive) wrist watch.
You bit your lip, still holding his face in your hands. You knew. You knew but you didn’t want to show it to Jackson.
Another loud knock.
“Is there someone bothering you here?” asked Jackson, searching for your gaze. He didn’t like the idea that someone would harass you, not even in the slightest. Worry was written all over his face as you untangled yourself from him.
“It’s just Martin,” you mumbled once your feet hit the cold floor.
“Martin? The doctor?” asked Jackson in shock.
You unlocked the door and opened it. Just as expected, Martin was there, fuming just a little bit. “Y/N!” he shouted and stormed in, not bothering to look around. “What is this? You aren’t picking up my calls for days now and you just lock yourself up here-“
“Good evening,” Jackson said, standing tall, his face authoritative, his hands in his pockets.
Martin stopped abruptly, staring at Jackson, startled. “Good evening.”
- - - continue - - -
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