#lashton timeline

[lashton-is-my-drug]

Lashton Timeline Masterpost; using 5sos and solo albums for eras

Using 5sos albums to show an overview/condensed relationship era timeline, using selected tracks. Release date is in parenthesis. Keep in mind, albums are recorded AT LEAST 6-8months before released, more typically closer to a year earlier.

A note I do want to make is that the affection between members of the band, and the fact they knew, and even created their pairing names, normalized and arguably fed into the "shipping" culture that happened. This has caused confusion throughout the fandom in delineating what friendship looks like and what a relationship looks like. Friendship is where the best relationships are based. How many times have you heard couples say that their partner is their best friend. All of the boys are best friends as well as soulmates, as themselves have stated.

Now with that out of the way....

(Gif: Fetus Lashton)

Luke's mom is Ashton's maths teacher 2009- 2010 school year.

Then at some point Luke and Ash are both at the cinema where Luke is getting bullied by some kids and Ashton steps in and defends Luke (knight in shining armor anyone???). I will make another post about the timeline of the band and Lashton. For this timeline though, I will be focusing on their music.

(December 2012) “Somewhere New” first EP

“Out of My Limit” [Luke songwriter] - Special attachment to this song as it was performed in 10th Anniv YT Show. The lyric referencing 2 years matches up with how long Luke and Ashton knew each other. Calum and Michael met in 3rd grade, Luke went to the same school with Cal and Michael. Also, Ash was the only one to have jobs to help with expenses. [[Side note: Something that’s been on my mind is how “meet split ends” could be a double meaning to reference the band Split Endz (same lead singer is in Crowded House. SE was prior to CH. Lead singer is known in the industry for his songwriting skills. Ash is a fan of Crowded House.)]]

“Beside You” [Luke songwriter] - It’s a song of longing. During an interview, Ash attempted explaining the meaning is one can of beans is with another can of beans, but there’s another can of beans that wants to be with one of them. He lost confidence in his explanation so he didn't continue on with it. 🥺☹️

(Gif: March 13, 2013 Ash London interview Ash leans over and kisses Luke's shoulder after caressing Luke's hair. Cal leans over onto Luke's other shoulder (doesn't kiss him ofc to try to cover it up) The interviewers don't even acknowledge it happening. Link

Pictured: April 14, 2013 Tweet posted by Luke then deleted, confirmed by an OG 5SOS fan)

Gif: October 30, 2013 Melbourne, Aus with their parents in the audience. During the song "Teenage Dream", which is already a suggestive song in of itself, Luke walks over to Ash with a huge grin on his face during the line "let you put your hands on me in my skin tight jeans" Then Ash sings the "let me be your teenage dream tonight" right into Luke's ear, while Ash is doing a rock n' roll suggestive shoulder roll. Luke is all for it. Link

Photo: Luke's mom takes photo of the moment and posts it to her socials

(June 2014) “Self-titled” album

Lashton young love era continues. Learning how to craft songs and production and forming a bond with producer/mentor John Feldmann. “She Looks So Perfect” single released March 2014.

This is strongly shown through songs like “She Looks So Perfect” (originally completely gender neutral in lyrics and title “You Look So Perfect”), “End Up Here” “Don’t Stop”, “Long Way Home”. SLSP and EUH have direct evidence about Luke and Ash’s relationship starting. The rush of first meeting your person and first love. ❤️

(June 15, 2014) "Don’t Stop” EP

“Don’t Stop” [Luke and Cal songwriters] confirmed lgbt on Track by Track YouTube video, Cal tells Michael he wrote it for him, meanwhile Luke and Ash are specifying a whole backstory which includes drinking at a party. The boys already did have experience drinking, even though not legally allowed yet. Luke's cheeky love song. Ash has a brave moment of adding that it can be about a boy, then Luke agrees with him. Remember, Ash didn't write it.

“Try Hard” Start of lyrics mentioning roses in Lashton songs, Luke and Ash present day have matching rose tattoos.

“Out of My Limit” included on EP.

(March 2014) “SLSP” Ep +B sides

“Wherever You Are” [Luke songwriter] Experiencing a special closeness with someone but unable to be together because of forces, have to hold back “every night I almost call you just to say it always will be you”, “you can say we’ll be together someday”, “I know I shouldn’t tell you”, “why can’t I stop feeling this way”, “but there’s nothing that compares to what we had, and so I walk alone”.

(October 2015) “Sounds Good Feels Good” album

Focused on mental health, trying to figure out how to handle pressures of the industry on one's self identity, and navigating relationships with one another. Full of teen angst. Heavily working with John Feldmann. Proving themselves to the industry.

Luke and Ash getting even more seriously involved (evidenced by “Vapor” “Waste The Night”)

(Gif: Nov 2015, Ashton showering Luke with love on the couch moment included in How Did We End Up Here 5sos documentary video. Ash is all happiness while again, Luke is enjoying the heavy affection from him.)

(June 2018) “Youngblood” album

Luke and Ash really step up as lead songwriters. Right after the end of tour sometime in August of 2017, the two of them go to Stockholm, Sweden together to immerse themselves in honing the craft of songwriting with Rami Yacoub and Carl Falk.

(Gif: May 28, 2017 Luke says he would "follow him to the end of the Earth" Link)

(Sept 13th, 2017) Luke tweets for Australia to legalize same sex marriage (he very rarely talks about political issues),

October 10th, 2017 Ash next to Luke, while in the car with Luke driving and Cal in the backseat, proudly announces “Luke lives with me now” via instagram livestream. Link

Oct 15th, Ash, makes sure everyone is aware they definitely are living together, tweets about him and Luke living together complete with a cute video of them in living room together. Link

Oct 20th, 2017 Australian marriage equality account tweets to Ash asking for a follow to be able to DM, Ash replies with “Done 🌈❤️”. Visuals take a much more purposeful presence than ever before during this era. During promo for YB, Luke and Ash wear matching rings.

Lyrically the song “Youngblood” seems to be wanting each other but with a bit of angsty sexuality and the games that are played.

“Valentine” [Ash songwriter] Ash directed the music video, music video included LGBT imagery. Genius interview, Sex and romance doesn't need a specific day, it should be all the time. Luke makes sure to say “it’s sweet”.

“Better Man” recorded in Bon Jovi’s guitarists house (Luke’s fave band), Luke said it was him being in “a very self-destructive place” “then juxtaposed in the chorus” of finding someone loving.

“Empty Wallets” Ashton trying to impress Luke by giving Luke money to spend, but then not approving of how he spent it (lyrics reference drugs). Ash does however, believe in second chances (Cocktail Chats). An interview exists that Ashton speaks about spending money on a partner, which insinuates its his love language.(I would include reference to interview but I don't remember which one, I've watched too many to remember which one, sorry) He's bought Luke expensive multiple custom leather jackets, and has made social media posts showing off such gifts. There's no evidence, as far as I know of, Ash buying lavish gifts for Cal or Michael. Yes, Ash bought all four of them brotherhood necklaces, which are meaningful, but there's nothing lavish, like custom leather jackets.

“Want You Back” During Zach Sang interview, Ash says it describes “falling in real love and it determines the way you go in relationships the rest of your life, frustration of not finding that again, [It’s] not the actual person”. Paying attention along the years how much Luke and Ash are on the same wavelength in interviews and such, like finishing each other’s sentences and connecting on each other’s thoughts and how affectionately (not the same affection towards Michael or Cal) they act towards each other. Luke “lyrics are sad, but upbeat [musically]”. Includes another reference to roses. Ash has worn a roses shirt. "Freckles on your back" Luke has freckles. Luke starts feeling comfortable enough to wear makeup in the music video. Wearing makeup is a big thing to the guys because of conservative views on gender norms they were surrounded by in Australia. Rainbow music video, with room for interpretation.

“Ghost of You” Band was/is escapism (started day 1 as escaping Aussie), this line is queer coded “my feet don’t dance like they did with you”, “(Led) Zeppelin shirt” is Ash, Ash has expressed that this song is emotionally meaningful numerous times ever since released. I have a whole lyrical analysis posted.

“Meet You There” Right person wrong time, will be together when time is right. Easily consider this as queer flagged relationship that can't be together for certain reasons...

"Midnight" Bonus track. Has an incredibly queer flagged theme of only being able to love someone at night, never in the light.

"Monster Among Men" Another bonus track. Queer flagged song. "I'm so bad for you", this song is so filled with testosterone.

"When You Walk Away" Another bonus track. "Such a sentimental love, In a cynical world". Yet another song about outside judgements on being with a lover, a common theme weaved throughout 5sos and solo discography..

(Gif: Calum's recording of Luke and Ash being adorable goofballs together moment, included in a 5SOS tour diary. Dare I include that while Ash and Luke are boyfriend'ing, Luke's beard is on the same boat...)

(Pic: Jun 6, 2017 Luke posts a photo to his IG captioned "ashtonio irwinie". Luke and Ash cozy during what can be construed as a date night. Link )

(March 2020) CALM album

Maturing even more into their adult life era

“Red Desert” Motivation as a band. Having a reason and muse that keeps you going for a goal. Luke and Ash are each other’s muse (soulmates, twin flames).

“Old Me” Moving through and past hard partying days, messing up but then working on what will make you a good partner

“Teeth” Lies giving butterflies, music video shows rainbows on Luke and shows Ash for lyric about seeing as "my wife". Theme of torment and working through each of their barriers/struggles. Ash posted an acoustic guitar version where the torment is clear. Later, when 5sos5 album is released, Ashton says it contains working through barriers.

“Wildflower” pop love song. Music video is rainbows galore including starting and ending with 5sos themselves as a rainbow. Ash tweet announcement includes rainbow. Ash is very proud of this song.

“Best Years” Luke professing his love, features The Edge guitar part. See my lyric analysis.

“Not In The Same Way” Luke looking at his mistakes from his and another perspectives (as per Luke), Ashton via ig livestream: “the concept’s beautiful. We love each other but not in the same way”. Luke: “chaotic relationship”, hurt each other “when you were just friends”. This wouldn’t match with being about Sierra since they were narratively shown together and narratively so quickly together as a couple. No time to be friends.

This song is a precursor to “COMPLETE MESS”.

“Lover of Mine” Luke and Ash devoted love song, having to deal with lies, “dance around the living room”, “when I look at my life and all of my crimes, you’re the only thing I think I got right” “kaleidoscope mind” 🌈 “seen the red, seen the blues”. This song describes a relationship that’s experienced a lot together.

“Lonely Heart” Ash pauses during his solo track by track IG live to take an emotional moment. Rainbow hearts lyric video. “Native of mine, you’re just my kind” (hello soulmates!!), dancing inside a burning house, being pulled apart from each other and hating the feeling of that, “I’ll always follow, I promise you, until the end of time” (refer back to Luke saying in interview he would "follow [Ash] to the end of the Earth"). When Michael suggests it’s Luke’s least fave song on CALM during a CapitalFM interview, Ash immediately says "I'm signing off". Michael has a pattern of razzing the guys like this.

Screenshot: Official audio video for "Lonely Heart". Rainbow hearts 🌈

“High” There’s an awkward back and forth when talking about this track during Ash London interview. The person is selfishly calling the other person to tell them they’ve changed. Double meaning: high as in smoking mj, or thinking well of this person. There’s a tone Luke and Ash are each speaking with. Luke sounding apologetic, Ash sounding perturbed.

Luke and Ashton release solo albums in between 5sos albums.

(2020) Ashton's album "Superbloom"

"Sunshine" Song includes lyrics... "Satellite dreams" feeling like he's alien. Doesn't fit in with humanity. Queer flagging. "Expensive perfumes, Ladies do not lose, Playin' but not on the team" and reference to living in a cage. Closeted queer flagging.

"Perfect lie" about having to tell lies with his partner, gender neutral. Closeted queer flagging. Album filled with torment despite publicly at the time being supposedly in a happy relationship with a female.

"I'm To Blame" He described this about getting high with someone. But then towards the end it takes a turn... "No I can't, Live a lie, You can't make me, Live a lie, Burning red, Letting go, Up in flames, All the same, I am too". This part is so heartbreaking to listen to. He's being told to live a certain way but he's not happy doing that. Closeted queer flagging. Years of manipulation subjected to him from Modest Management perhaps?

June 1, 2021 - Ashton posts a tweet during Pride month announcing it's not just Pride Month but Pride Life.

July 9 - Luke includes gay marriage reference in first single “Starting Line” music video.

There's so many references to opening up his eyes all throughout his album. Feeling fake and being sorry for how things are and how he handles himself throughout, asks for forgiveness.

"Starting Line" Processing his childhood and the band until now. Sets up all the topics covered throughout the album, as per Luke. Undertones of being LGBT. A friends parent, not in the fandom, heard this song and asked if he is gay. See my analysis of the music video/lyrics post. When Luke's album and single was released, Ashton was intensely supportive and commenting on his social media, posting ig stories. "Jumping into my dreams" comment by Ash on his ig post for the music video. Link to Ash supportive social media

"Place In Me" "You always liked this time of day, no words left to play on, how many chances does it take" This is such Ashton coded. Lyrics are so ingrained in his being, being considered as a lyricist is so important to him, but sometimes words are not enough without action to back them up. Remember how Ash is willing to give chances? It sounds to me like this is something Luke is hearing from Ash, about getting things right. This song is saying sorry and no matter how things are this person is a part of his being. Ashton posts ig story of this song "Now with my eyes wide open, it's heaven in your arms. I'm crying and it feels so good".

"Mum" The references to chandeliers and scared of not being accepted. Hoping his mum is along with him through it. "Love the fear of falling" "jump into my ocean" "can't you hear me?" "nothing hurts me now".

"Baby Blue" "I'm on my way to Wonderland, Take off my suit and wander in for a moment, Or stay for a lifetime" Heartbreakingly candid lines that are queer flagging of closeting. "I'm hiding in a living sleep". Closeting. "Living in the in between, And I'm never gonna last, never gonna last" Closeting. Well, you get the picture.

"Motion" Music video promote it about struggling with mental health as well as queer flagging and closeting. Trapped behind glass (same theme as Harry Styles video for "As It Was"). Rainbow of colors. Drinking a gallon of milk.

"Comedown" Last track on the album. Looking back on how he's not been accepting truths and instead avoiding them."Light up a darkness I was never meant to" Hinting that another person in his life brought on revelations. This song can be connected to COMPLETE MESS. Camelia Street is located in Australia in NSW area where the boys are from. He released this album with Sony Music, which is known for using personal lives/stunts to promote projects. Hence him creating the story of it connected with Sierra. "Seeing those colours creeping in, They give me something I can feel, As the seconds start to take bloom" Connected with mental health as well as self acceptance as lgbt.

Ashton posts an unboxing video to his IG story when he receives a vinyl of Luke's album.

(September 2022) 5SOS5 album

Luke and Ash continue to express being committed to one another by wearing matching black onyx rings, engagement/wedding bands. There was different matching rings during Youngblood era as well. The songwriting has increased in maturity, even more than ever before. Contemplative look back where they’ve come from (“Red Line”, for instance) and where they are today (“COMPLETE MESS”, for instance)

“Complete Mess” Luke and Ash complete each other, but at the same time can ruin each other. Luke said during an interview, the song is romantic. Music video was only the relationships between members of the band. Luke wore his black onyx ring (frames of him showing his hand used for Spotify canvas too). Song idea started with Luke “you make me complete”, then Ash put a 5sos “touch of misery”. Promo for the song is so full of Lashton, yet the Lierra “engagement” gets brought up throughout, never by Luke. (To me, it reminds me of how Zayn was throughout his engagement to Perrie Edwards.) Song also has a connection with a shirt Luke owns. Ash has the picture of it at the ready on his phone, should anyone ask.

“Easy For You To Say” Considering moving back to Aussie to get back to roots when settling down.

“HAZE” Chill vibe about being in love. Luke and Ash literally singing to one another for a verse about when the bullshit is getting to them, they’re able to be themselves with each other “feel human once again”.

“You Don’t Go To Parties” Ash’s perspective. Him being with everyone he knows but yet he’s still not engaging with them “clinging to my couch” besides getting high with friends since he’s not interested in finding anyone there. He can’t stop talking about the ”past 5 years running out my mouth” (matches up with the timeline of when they lived together 2017). Luke and Ash have been longtime party buddies. Could be about Ash’s sobriety, as well.

“Caramel” Navigating being together through how more complicated life has become (similar theme from “2011”). A love that’s seen and been through highs and lows “it’s been a while since you and I been where we started”, but not losing what they have together “I don’t want to let it fade away”. “True love” yet having to “play pretend”. But at the end of the day, it's still "love like a landslide, I kiss you goodnight". Both Luke and Ash each choose it as one of their faves on the album.

“Red Line” Melancholy Ashton reflecting on the time spent in London riding the train to songwriting sessions. Light vs dark. Falling out of love, he’d lose himself (feels like “Complete Mess” adjacent)

“Moodswings” has parallels with Luke’s song “Slip Away” (struggling to get out of your own way when things are going good, mental health).

“Flatline” The intensity of falling in love. Luke is shining (“COMPLETE MESS”). “Hard to fake”. Has a dark twist (Ash has spoken about enjoying doing that in his songwriting).

(Photo: The guys celebrating a successful album. Luke and Ash, Michael and Cal.)

(Gif: April 2023 Tecate Pa'l Norte music festival in Monterrey)

#5sos #5 seconds of summer #ashton irwin #ashton 5sos #luke hemmings #luke 5sos #ashton fletcher irwin #luke robert hemmings #lashton #lashton hemwin #lashton is real #lashton timeline #songwriting #lgbt #lgbt 🏳️‍🌈 #gay #calum hood #michael clifford #lgbtq #self titled album #sounds good feels good #5sos5 #lgbtqia #lashton masterpost #love is love #love wins #youngblood #malum #closeting #larry stylinson

[daydadahlias]

You talked about doing another chapter ed fic this year before. Just wondering if, if you do do it, it’ll be around the same time as MiM was?

And how are you doing! Got any cool plans for spring break? Also 5sos are being very active right now and I cannot handle it lmao. Wishing you all the best!

hellooo!!! thank u for asking !!! yes! i mentioned that i wanna write another chaptered fic this year (which i DO bc i loveee writing chaptered fics and i always try to write at least one a year and the one I'm outlining rn is literally going to be so fun to write aaa!!) but I don't really know if I can give u a timeline on it rn!!

for some context, I started writing MiM in November 2022 and then began posting it April 2023 (so that was 6 months of writing before I ever even posted anything). This current fic (that I'm so fondly calling groupie fic rn as I used to call MiM grindr fic <3) is still in the planning phases (and I've written like >1k of Ch. 1) and while it's going to be a lot shorter than MiM (so it will be written / posted on a shorter timeline), I don't really know when I'm going to start posting it !! Definitely not by this April lmao.

If I were to guestimate a timeline for you, I'd say that I'm going to write most of it during the Summer so an August posting-date is what I'm aiming for :)

and I'm ok!!! my spring break is unfortunately over as of today and I'm back in school and stressed abt the workload I've come back to but the week was mostly good!!! i spent most of it hanging out with Sam & Chubby (my dog and cat) and eating good food (and writing fics i can never post lmfao) and doing homework <3

and YES lashton are ACTIVE. it's a crazy time to be alive. i cannot wait for ashton to start posting what he's been working on eeee <3

#pigeon #anon #i hope this helps give u some idea lol but even i am not sure when this fic will be Ready To Go #it wont be anything like MiM length wise. I'm thinking only 50-60k frankly #maybe more if i go insane but #rn im not planning on it being too long #ive always wanted to write a fic like this so !! I'm excited !!!!!! #and i hope Jess Stans are too. that's a joke pls don't read into that #thank u for asking !!!!!!

[xlstriker38]

listing all my ocs related to my fan timeline of radiation in neopia just for my own benefit bc i want to draw all of them at some point

Rupert Karagoff - white (beige) blumaroo age 58

Barel Caen - green aisha age 34

Sidora Caen (née Arlen) - red cybunny age 35

Becquerel Quilis - glowing bori age 32

Carliss Antalon - ice yurble age 27

Ebrosius Lirvan - starry kacheek age 45

Jeneson Partle - yellow poogle age 47

Lashton Greyth - split poogle age 38

#save

[honeyedlashton]

Why can’t this be the thing anymore?

#remember this photo? #and Ashton’s obsession with it?? #(I say like I was around at that point smfh) #anyway #the timeline has been dead and I’m trying to post every day still but omfg why is it so hard #I don’t know why my shit hasn’t been picking up like normal #but hey tl I’m awake #maybe I’ve been shadowbanned?? #I don’t think so but Jesus #I miss lashton content #we really are in the dryest spell #it’s literally homophobic that we haven’t got lashton content #it’s PRIDE MONTH #also #is this filter off putting? I can’t tell #and I don’t remember if it had a filter on it when Ashton posted it #the picture I found had this filter so don’t come for me if it didn’t it’s a little too filtered for my taste but whatever #otp: i’m fond of you #this looks like it’s gonna piss me off #nobody comes between me and my tequila #ashton irwin #afi #luke hemmings #lrh #lashton #5sos #calum hood #cth #michael clifford #mgc

[bandsanitizer]

.

#so. my plans to revamp my close as strangers fic has turned into #me making a playlist that’s 1hr 17min plus an edit for the playlist cover as a holder #until i feel like making a better edit #and an idea for a sequel to the close as strangers fic that is more of an alternative perspective than sequel #well it’s half sequel sorta #it fills in the close as strangers gaps and moves forward #and that’s what i’m thinking of as the last young renegade fic #basically it’s lashton centric with close as strangers following one of their pov #and the last young renegade following the other pov #and basically it’s all still considered the close as strangers universe in my brain #also with like an interlude or something or even a sequel to the sequel based on sick of losing soulmates by dodie #anYWAYS i have all that and absolutely nothing but the original fic written #which is basically just for me to reference for a basic timeline for the fic #but also not being what I want #and idk this is too much thinking and going tangential from the original fic concept #like will it ever be written? i don’t know LOL #and this isn’t even considering I have no idea how to begin characterizing recent 5sos like i haven’t written 5sos fic since 2016 at least! #hdkajdkskhdjahdjsak i’ll just backdate the fic and use the benefit of AU lmaoooooo #I don’t want to say it will be terrible bc i’m supposed to believe in myself and like not do self fulfilling prophecy thoughts but like !!!! #i want it to work but gosh that takes work and like the work to do it shows care but it’s still work #but i reaaaaaaally want to write the fic. it’s been like 5 years since #alison speaks? #my writing #i don’t know why they call it times square i don’t see any queue #^scheduling but like if you’ve got thoughts like ‘wow i’m intrigued’ or ‘wow don’t do that wtf r u thinking?’ #or have any characterization suggestions i’d appreciate it! especially regarding dialogue LOL #thank you if you read this far <3 have a lovely day!

[clumsyclifford]

3, 11, 20, 75 please -hazel

yes i WILL answer these! and then i will go fix my slides on the final project. i am a terrible person. the worst, some might say

3. Do you share your fic ideas, or do you keep them to yourself? yes! both! i am kind of weird about it. there's probably a psychological basis for why i share some ideas but keep others under lock & key, but i don't want to psychoanalyze myself tonight, so let's just say it's fairly random. if a particular idea is giving me trouble though then i will definitely share them with someone, usually megs or meghna or you sometimes, to help me brainstorm a solution. actually literally today (no. last night??? yeah last night) megs solved a big ol fic problem i was having. that's not really relevant, i just wanted to give megs a shoutout.

11. Do you write scenes in order, or do you jump around? i try my level best to write in order. on occasion i'll be struck by a piece or a few sections of an idea that i'll write out, and then when i go to flesh out the idea i realize i have to write around them and in between the existing scenes, and in those cases i necessarily have to write out of order, but if at all possible, i write in order. i just find it a lot easier for my brain, because time goes in order, so. like. yeah.

i will say as a disclaimer to this: when i say in order, i mean in chronological order. so i think that hypothetically if i was writing a fic with a non-linear narrative, i would maybe try writing that in chronological order and then breaking it up and rearranging it. actually, i'm thinking about the merrikat today was a fairytale/stay stay stay fic and i feel like i wrote that one out of order, but it did feel like i was writing two different fics - one for timeline A, and one for timeline B several years later. if that makes sense. anyway the point is. in order when possible.

20. Do you prefer writing AUs or canon fics? canon! to be honest i never realized just how much i love writing canon compliant or canon mostly-compliant, mildly-divergent fics, but recently it's come to my attention that...like...i almost exclusively write that shit. when it comes to fictional media, that is. rpf is a different story because it's all technically AU/non-canon (because what even is canon for real people lol) so in those cases i think i weigh canon and AU equally. but when there's actual source material, i really like writing within the sandbox of the source material. sometimes i do some canon divergence to, like, make a character be alive who died in canon because i think their death is bullshit, or have two characters be dating in the background when they weren't in the show, or incorporate some fun fanon like making a character jewish who really deserved to be jewish in the first place, but generally, it's most fun for me to take existing canon characters, with all (or almost all) their canon experiences/memories/trauma, and just. see what they do.

75. Is there a particular fic that readers gravitated towards that you didn’t expect? fucking spiderman lashton got so much traction. like SO much more attention than i was expecting. i shit you not while i was writing that fic i was like this is so dumb this is so silly this is so stupid and then i posted it (didnt even make a PROPER LINK POST, just made a textpost and put the link in the text) and somehow that bullshit became one of my most popular fics, stats-wise. like three different people have made moodboards for that fic. LIKE????? i'm not complaining because i really enjoy spidey lashton it's a funny fic very lighthearted very enjoyable but i swear to god i was not expecting it to be NEARLY as popular as it became. like that fic was posted in june 2020. that was. like. i had had my bellawritess ao3 for a month at that point. JUST ONE MONTH!!!!!!!! WHO WAS OUT HERE FINDING THAT FIC??????

fanfiction writing asks!

#if tumblr had not been down that night spidey lashton would never have been written probably can you believe that #can you believe one of my most popular fics (literally top 10. out of two hundred and twenty fics.) only exists because #my favorite social media website malfunctioned at a critical time of night #WILD #these are such good questions hazel i really love these ones #ask #hazel #allsassnoclass #fic talk #don't know if this counts as fic talk

[plushyluke]

lashton is blessing our timelines today 🥰

#lashton is real oops #lashton #luke hemmings #ashton irwin

[calumsash]

ok so i posted a cashton fic rec a couple of months ago and since then i have expanded my horizons and read more than just these two. this fandom truly has the best writers and i can’t thank you enough for the joy and comfort your fics bring me and many more im sure. most of these are cashton and cake since they are personally my favourite pairings to read, i still have many more on my to-read list so hopefully i make another one of these with more fics! so here we go in no particular order with the fics i got around to reading in these couple of months:

calum hood/ashton irwin

Empty Gut by @daydadahlias​ - Cowboys and horses and long, lonely nights in the wilderness. (11k)

here’s the thing, i have been hearing about jess’ fics from a friend of mine before i came across their blog, got many screenshots of their lashton fics (which the moment i start reading more lashton they’ll be first in line) and from what i saw i was in love with the writing. so when i saw you writing a brokeback mountain AU for cashton, none the less, you got me. it was so heartbreaking and i loved the way you wrote all of ashton’s inner monologues. i knew how the movie ends and i still cried at the ending for calum.

Fall Into Me by @ashtcnirwin​ - In which Ashton acquires a couple of piercings and it comes with a slight change in his way of being, and it throws Calum for a loop. (16k)

holy shit where do i start, it’s always refreshing to read sub!ash since usually it’s the opposite. i really loved the different dynamics you put into these fics between all the guys. one second i was laughing my ass off and another second it got way too hot in the room while reading this, which in my opinion is a great combo. also, im very grateful you graced us with a part two for this series cause when i didn’t think it could get better it did.

In Your Sweet December Haze by @fourdrunksluts​ - It’s been years since Ashton’s last seen his best friend's dorky little brother, Calum, but when their families decide to get together for their first shared Christmas since they were all kids, it’s more than just the holiday spirit that pulls Ashton in. (20k)

this fic has just the right amount of angst and comfort, i could literally picture this as a film. i loved the back and forth in the timeline and that way you slowly realize the chain of events that let them to the present. also, you made me cry over a furby and i can’t get over that.

i want you (bless my soul) by @michaelownsmyheart​ - In which Ashton moves in with a guy named Michael, Michael is in love with Luke and annoyed at Calum, and the guy with shaved blue hair from the elevator is too hot for Ashton to know what to do about it. (22k)

oh boy this is a good one, another sub!ash and im really loving this. the cashton here was excellent, but what was also excellent is the friendship between michael and ashton - their dynamic was so funny and sweet and they’re the perfect roommates.

calum hood/luke hemmings

He Did Ballet by @kaleidoscopeminds​ - Luke's life is perfectly on track. He is about to get everything he's ever wanted, to become a Principal dancer for the Royal Ballet. He's focused, determined and nothing will get in his way. Then he meets Calum, a smooth-tongued barman with dangerous eyes, and suddenly not everything's so simple. (37k)

the motherfuckin ballet fic everybody! the first cake fic i read and what got me into this mess. i really loved the buildup in the relationship and the combination of fluff and angst (chapter 7 im looking at you) and ballet au just has my heart ok?

more than just a neon weekend by @clumsyclifford​ - Calum shifts into a sitting position. The sheets fall further down his body and Luke looks down at his hands so he won’t stare. He’s still mostly naked, too, and he can feel Calum watching him, and his cheeks burn. Calum needs to leave. Calum needs to take his clothes and go and they need to never tell anyone about this and never talk about it again, because this could destroy the band if it turns into — if anything. (8k)

listen, im a sucker for angst and miscommunication and this got it. the whole fic got me hurting for both luke and, just wanting for them to be ok. “Means nothing to me if it’s nothing to you” you just had to hurt me huh. i was just waiting for them to talk properly and for them end each others pain.

the flatmate arrangement by @kaleidoscopeminds​ - Hi Calum/Poor Struggling Paralegal, So I’ll be upfront with you. It’s a one-bed flat. I also live here. HOWEVER before you delete this and think I’m a freak, I work nights so I wouldn’t be here anytime you would be. You can have the flat exclusively from 6 pm to 8 am, Saturday night and all day Sunday. Understand this sounds like a bit of a crazy arrangement but I could do with the cash, let me know what you think? Luke Hemmings (Poor Struggling Children’s Nurse). (20k)

this au is so cute, you really got me wishing to have a roommate that i will never see. i love how michael and ashton both were like “this is crazy, why do you wanna die?” and luke and calum are like “it’s fine, don’t be dramatic”. luke backing when he’s stressed? leaving calum baked goods? them leaving notes to each other? this is so sweet i love this fic.

michael clifford/ashton irwin

Gotta Be Cruel to be Kind by @fourdrunksluts​ - The fandom required 10 Things I Hate About You fic. (26k)

you are right. every fandom needs a 10 things i hate about you fic! and michael and ashton as patrick and kat was just perfect. side cake was also adorable. it got all the great parts of the movie, but you changed it in a way that made the story so much better.

luke hemmings/ashton irwin

Off-Screen by @allsassnoclass​ - Now that classes are being taught from home due to the pandemic, students are getting a glimpse into Professor Irwin's home life, especially when his mysterious husband keeps interrupting class. (3k)

i loved that this one was from an outsider’s perspective. it gave me the feeling like i was one of the students in ashton’s class haha. luke being a clingy husband is also adorable. just pure fluff.

OT4

Let Go Of Any Hesitation by @fourdrunksluts​ - When Ashton's frustration is a creative block, it becomes the entire band's problem, and they each have their own idea of how to get him out of his head. (18k)

this one got it all, i love reading about ashton getting all the attention and getting taken care of. truly is a sucker for ashton and his boys. ashton is so stubborn here, but the moment he lets go it’s so good.

once again, thank you for writing these, you all are incredible and deserve all the love ♥

#yay another one! love all of you!! #i have so many more fics to read i just need to find the time!! need more hours in the day #5sos #5sos fic #this is so long im so sorry for my ramblings i had to put it under the read more #go check these out if you haven't already and give the authors love!!!!

[hemmoangel]

i am desperately in need of bottom!luke, lashton, malum, larrie, bottom!michael, and harries to follow on twt. i was forced to make a new account recently & im trying to keep a positive vibe on my timeline. send me accounts 🧸🤍💖🩰🌸🐰🦢

#luke hemmings #lashton #bottom luke #lrh #ashton irwin #top ashton #5sos #twink luke #gay5sos #lashton hemwin #afi #cth #mgc

[lashton-is-my-drug]

Lashton Masterpost Timeline

So I think I'm getting to a point where I'm just gonna start posting the Lashton timeline that myself and a couple of my friends have created. We scoured through hours and hours and hours of interviews and videos and social media posts and it's all by Year and Date.

Anyone ready???

#5sos #5 seconds of summer #ashton irwin #ashton 5sos #luke hemmings #luke 5sos #ashton fletcher irwin #lashton #luke robert hemmings #lashton hemwin #lashton is real #lashton timeline #they've done a SHIT TON of interviews #Ashton WASNT KIDDING about the 1.000s of interviews #lashton throughout the years #lgbt #lgbtpeople #lgbtqplus #lgbtq community #lgbtq #lgbtlove #lgbtqia #queer #lgbtqiia+ #gay #gay things #love is love #loveislove #love wins #queer stuff

[glossierluke]

hiiii im a "baby lashton" and saw ur post about ashton holding lukey's hand, it was so cute and made my heart melt!!!!! you talked about making a masterlist and and i would love to see, it doesn't have to be a complete timeline but it would help a lot to know more about the lashton best moments

Hello :—)! It’s so cute to see a newer Lashton stans, I could clearly remember that I was once in that exact position and it reminded me how time can fly real fast, I could recall watching the voodoo doll performance and extremely baffled of two men eye-flirting with each other and exchanging bashful smiles. On the other note, I’d really love to create a masterlist but I think it’s the end game for me, you know? Lashton for me is a pursuit of something.... I couldn’t point my finger on, so listing them down felt as though writing my last will and testament, and the secrets of the universe.

I might create a masterlist, someday, to attract more and newer Lashton stans, I just don’t know yet as to when, or how. Admittedly, I have Lashton things that I have to gatekeep and when I’m in the right mood, I might share it. Disclaimer though since you’re a baby lashton, you are in deep shit with this ship. Like in real deep shit. I’ll entertain more asks from you or you can DM me and perhaps, we can talk about Lashton all night long. I love freaking out new Lashton stans and make them all 🤯 with hidden or unrecognized Lashton moments. 😆😆

#honey

[daydadahlias]

Hello! I’m fairly new to the 5SOS fandom, and I just learned that Ashton and Luke used to live together? I was wondering, considering you’re clearly an Ashton fan, if you knew what that was all about? I didn’t really find a lot on it, except that it was in 2017, i think.

Hello, honey!!

Ah, how flattering it is to clearly be an Ash fan. That's my guy <3 and I actually do know what that is all about!

So the story essentially goes that Luke was in a very toxic relationship circa-2017 and was in a fairly severe depressive episode around this era as well. I'm not gonna speculate on this (as in, I don't know how true it is) but there was also talk that he was pretty heavy into drug use at this point (I think it should come as no surprise that 5sos indulge in party drugs considering the nature of their lifestyle but I'm talking about a cocaine addiction). Luke has been pretty open about 2016-2017 being horrible (and pretty much the worst) years of his life (as have all the boys, although it's obvious those years were the hardest on Luke). In the Apple Music interview (which I am trying to find a link to and will reblog if/when I find it), Luke says that things were actually so bad that he "couldn't be alone" and that's why he had to move in with Ashton. Ashton was also going through a rough time (Ash never specified why but obviously rumors of break-ups and alcoholism come into play here) and he made this really beautiful tweet about the time that Luke and he were living together. So, essentially, they just chose to lean on each other during the rough points in their life. Their friendship and love for each other is really beautiful <3 And also the videos of them living together are very funny and cute lol.

I just feel like I'd be doing you a disservice if I didn't link you Anna's fic Tidal Wave which is essentially all about the 2017 period and Luke living with Ash. It's definitely not biographical in the sense that,,, lashton are gay for each other lol but the timeline is actually pretty fucking accurate.

#sorry i didnt get to this sooner babe #been a rough day lmfao #for obvious reasons #pigeon #i'll go do some fun digging and reblog some content from them living together over the next day methinks

[easierlftv]

I really like 70. “After everything we’ve been through, you still don’t think that I love you?” and it FEELS like an Ashton or lashton prompt but any pairing would be great!

okay, so I chose lashton bc they really have been living in my mind rent-free. also, I’m so sorry this got so sad 

Warnings: angst, insecurities, fears of cheating, hurt/comfort

70.  “After everything we’ve been through, you still don’t think that I love you?”

Ashton sighed as he scrolled through his twitter, his eyes jumping from tweet to tweet as he attempted to exhaust himself. Every once and a while, a small chuckle escaped his lips as he flicked through the various memes on his timeline. Just as he prepared to set his phone down for the night, a new tweet popped up with a bold headline. 

Luke Hemmings, of 5 Seconds of Summer, steps out with a new mystery brunette as he leaves local bar.

Ashton’s breath seemed to catch in his throat as he reread the headline a few more times before gaining the courage to click on the link. As the bright webpage loaded on his phone, he nervously messed with his fingers as the photos finally appeared on the page. His stomach had jumped to his throat as his eyes caught sight of his boyfriend, hand in hand with a beautiful brunette he hadn’t recognized from anywhere else. He continued to scroll through the page, scanning the photos that showed the pair of them getting into an uber together before he tossed his phone across the room. With tears prickling his eyes he buried his head into his hands. 

It wasn’t that he didn’t trust Luke, of course, he did. But, all throughout their relationship, his insecurities lingered throughout his mind. Luke was younger and much more attractive than he was, so he always feared that one day Luke would wise up and leave. 

His cries filled the bedroom as his mind jumped to various conclusions and his thoughts began tormenting him that his worst fears had been realized.  Through his tears, he hadn’t heard the door to his room door open and he hadn’t felt the bed dip beside him. 

“Ash? Sweetheart? What’s wrong?” Luke’s gentle voice tore at his heart, as he was pulled into the blonde’s arms. Ashton moved his hands from his face and wrapped his arms around Luke’s chest, trying to pull him as close as he could. Luke remained quiet as Ashton continued to cry into his chest, and tried to reassure him as best as he could without knowing what was wrong. Eventually, Ashton’s cries died down, and he pulled away from Luke’s embrace to wipe away his tears. 

“‘M sorry, I’m fine it...it was stupid.”

“It’s not stupid if you’re that upset Ash,” Luke reached out to rub his back, but when Ashton flinched away, he was quick to retract his hand. “Is... is it something I did?”

“It’s nothing Luke, I told you it was stupid, please just go to bed.” Ash sighed, trying to brush the incident under the rug but Luke wasn’t having it. 

“Ash, please just talk to me. We need to talk about this, especially if I did something to upset you.”

“It was a stupid tweet okay! I saw some pictures of you and that brunette girl leaving the fucking bar, and it just....it fucking got to me okay! Drop it.” He snapped, dropping his head into his hands as Luke sits in stunned silence. The quiet hangs on for a few moments before he finally speaks. 

“After everything we’ve been through, you still don’t think that I love you?”

“No, of course I don’t think that. It’s just... my stupid brain runs wild sometimes,” He admits, finally allowing his thoughts to pour free, “and it’s so hard not to think these thoughts when they never stop popping up in my head. You’re so beautiful Luke, and you deserve so much more than me.” 

Ashton’s outpouring of words shatters Luke’s heart the moment silence falls between them. His heart feels as if it’s been ripped out of his chest, and he’s unsure of how exactly he’ll not only be able to fix the hole in his heart but the one in Ashton’s as well.

Blurb Weekend from this prompt list!

#lashton #luke hemmings x ashton irwin #luke x ashton #5sos blurbs #5sos imagines #slash blurbs #5sos slash blurbs #5 seconds of summer blurbs #5 seconds of summer imagines #lashton blurb #my writings #drabble #Anon #answered

[calpalirwin]

Story Updates

Alright guys. So I mentioned how I had blurb ideas I fully intend to write. So here’s a sneak peek of what you can look forward to:

- Dad!Luke

- Bratty Behavior sequel with a TWIST! Can you guess what it is? (No @cxddlyash you can’t guess cuz I already told you what it was)

- Have ya missed BUB? Me too. More fun stuff planned

- Choices! Gonna finish that sucker!

- A fic revolving around that weird ass mirror head prop thing Ash wore in the No Shame video (I’ve expressed my hesitation to this, but I’m also not one to back down from a challenge so we’ll see what type of shithole mess that becomes)

- Lashton smut?

- Neighbor!Ash?

Now, mind you, these ideas probably will not come in this order. And I wish I had a timeline to let you know when to expect this. Except dad!Luke. Dad!Luke will be available any time between tomorrow and Monday.

Thanks for following my creative writing journey and for your patience. I hope what I have planned fills you with the same excitement I have. If it doesn’t, please feel free to send in ideas that DO fill you with excitement and I will do my best to accommodate ya! Or if you just need someone to talk/vent to my messages are always open and I’m always happy to hear from ya. Much love y’all!

#galcal updates #come chat #galcal irwin

[sierratheory]

1/3 so. i couldn’t sleep and started tryna figure out the timeline for the guys’ work cuz my gut feelin still is tellin me that they’re only releasing stuff so rushed to get rid of modest. as they said during yb promo, after slfl finished they took some days off, shortly after that they started questioning if they should stay a band, somewhere around that time luke probably had his breakup w arz. then s came into the picture and started messing things up with lashton.

2/3 maybe all of these got in the way for them to focus on their work? supposedly after june/july last year they have “settled down” with their lives and everything’s getting stable? i realize how the gfs r probably still pretty annoying and hard to deal with, but maybe it’s actually getting easier (no pun intended lol) for them to focus even w gfs ard? 3/3 it’s 3am rn n my period is literally killing me so i’m sorry if i’m not making a lot of sense. i hope ive gotten my major points across Ana i’m very interested in ur guys’ opinions?

I can only speak for myself on this, but you may have a solid point there. It’s very possible things could be suddenly rushed due to the foreseeable end of their contract with Modest right around the corner. It’s no shock that a good portion of the fans that are entirely fed up with all the drama instigated by Modest want the guys to find better management and fast. The guys deserve a management team that will focus on their music always and not be some kind of dictator over their entire lives personal and work combined. Of course, only time will tell on what happens. 

#ask #anon #piper #paging red #paging blue #paging owner

[clumsyclifford]

if you're still taking prompts “i haven’t seen him smile like that in ages.” with emo lashton maybe? so perhaps emo lashton having a good day i guess 😅 i love them so much sorry if you want just change this to normal lashton 🙈 -fiancee

emo lashton having a GOOD DAY i think you’re messing with the entire natural order of the world fiancee i dont even think this is legally allowed but i tried my best for you. also this fic includes a secret shoutout to @reveriesofawriter & her long way home theory so.......yeah

-

The thing about feeling bad is that Ashton always forgets that it ends. 

When it’s him, it’s so easy to lose sight of the light at the end of the tunnel in favor of shutting his eyes and drowning in the darkness of it, sinking as deep as he can go until the pit of his stomach reaches the floor, until the soles of his feet hit rock bottom. Under the heavy weight of bad days, bad weeks, it always slips Ashton’s mind that it won’t always be this dismal. There’s an all-encompassing fact to his depression, so that when it sinks its teeth in it swallows Ashton up whole, and he thinks this is it, there’s only this, it’ll be just like this for the rest of my life, and it’s in those times that Ashton wonders if he shouldn’t just maybe cut that timeline short.

But he has to grit his teeth and bear it, because that’s really not an option for him. So he shoulders his own weight, and then one day he finds himself cracking a smile at a funny joke, and the realization strikes like a hammer, that this is the end of the darkness, for now. The tunnel has finally opened up, and the sun is starting to shine again, and Ashton feels dizzy with freedom.

The feeling of floating after being bogged down by the absolute bitch that is depression is relieving, no doubt. But there’s nothing compared to watching Luke get that feeling.

Ashton recognizes the signs of a crash as soon as it happens. Normally maybe he wouldn’t, but he’s so attuned to Luke, these days especially, that when something shifts, Ashton feels it. It’s small at first, and gets worse; Luke doesn’t really talk when they have dinner, and then he just stops coming to dinner. Ashton sees him around the house less and less, and makes a habit of knocking on his bedroom door just to hear the monotonous, “Yeah,” just to be sure Luke’s still inside, breathing. There’s no use trying to prise Luke from his misery — Ashton knows how listless Luke can be, how heavy he must feel — and all Ashton can do is tap subtle reminders into the doorframe that he’s here, if Luke needs him. 

(One way or another, Luke always needs him. Selfishly, Ashton is glad, because God knows he needs Luke more than is probably good for him, and this way it’s at least a two-way street.)

In the dark fog clouding the house, Ashton rigidly maintaining his role of caretaker, they both forget their plans.

“Alex.”

Alex's smile becomes tinged with uncertainty. “Ashton!”

“You’re at our house,” Ashton says slowly, racking his brain for a reason why.

Alex furrows his brow. He’s brought his guitar, Ashton notices, and it hits like a fucking freight train.

“Aren’t we writing?” Alex asks, and Ashton slaps his palm against his forehead.

“Fuck. Shit, we so are. Fuck, fuck, fuck, I totally forgot. I’m so sorry, man.”

Alex grins. “No problem. I’ve been there. You want me to go, or…?”

“No, no, you’re here already. Sorry. Come in.” Ashton glances behind him as Alex crosses the threshold and the door swings shut. Luke is in his room. Luke’s been in his room all day, and for most of yesterday too. Fuck. If he’d remembered he would have rescheduled with Alex, but now Alex is here, and Ashton likes to hang out with him even if they can’t get much done. Besides, Ashton likes writing with Alex.

It just feels wrong without Luke, but — whatever. Life has to go on. 

“Let me just,” Ashton says, feeling frazzled. Alex laughs.

“You’re high-strung today,” he observes, and Ashton runs a hand through his hair, feeling kind of embarrassed.

“Yeah. Uh, maybe. Sorry. Let me grab Luke, um, if I can.” He bites his lip. “He might not want to…he’s kind of, um.” Ashton trails off, but Alex picks up the thread anyway, and nods soberly.

“It’s cool,” he says.

“I’ll just check,” Ashton says, and leaves Alex in the living room, setting up his guitar, while he disappears to the back of the house to drum his fingers against Luke’s door.

“Luke?”

Luke pulls the door open, and Ashton breathes a sigh of relief without meaning to. Luke’s in the cotton t-shirt and joggers that he sleeps in, and his hair is unruly. Ashton resists the urge to reach out and fix it, and then thinks fuck it and reaches out anyway. He’s missed seeing Luke. There are dark circles under his eyes, and if Ashton peers further into the room he can spy Luke’s laptop open on the bed and his songwriting notebook next to it.

Luke says, “Alex is here. I know, I heard.” He leans into Ashton’s touch when Ashton rearranges his hair, and Ashton leaves his hand cupping Luke’s crown even after he’s finished fixing it up.

“You wanna join us?” he offers quietly. “It’s fine if you don’t. Alex will —”

“No, I will,” Luke sighs. “I should.” 

“Don’t do us any favors,” Ashton says, joking but also serious. “Honestly, Luke.”

“I’m coming,” Luke says firmly. He rubs his eyes with the heels of his palm — almost childishly, Ashton thinks — and says, “Give me a minute to, like.” He gestures vaguely, kind of towards himself.

“Okay,” Ashton says, because he knows too well how it feels to be babied when he’s set his mind to something, and it’s too frustrating for words. Luke is an adult. If he says he’s fine, Ashton has to trust that.

“He’s coming,” Ashton relays when he returns to the living room. Alex is sitting on the couch, messing around. Ashton gets snatches of familiar tunes, but Alex switches it up before he can put a name to them.

“Is everything okay?” Alex asks. Ashton shakes his head, smiling wryly.

“That’s the wrong question,” he says, and exhales loudly. “Everything will be okay. We’ll be fine.”

Alex gives a short nod. “I get it,” he says, and Ashton believes him.

Luke appears then, bundled up in a hoodie that once belonged to Ashton and the same joggers. “Hey,” he greets Alex, with a smile that doesn’t really reach his eyes. “Sorry about that.”

“No worries, man,” Alex says, hopping to his feet to pull Luke into a hug. Ashton half expects Luke to jerk away, but Luke sinks into it, and Alex maybe hugs him tighter than usual. 

When they break apart, Alex says, “There’s something I want to show you guys, actually. I forgot I had this here, but — it’s all in my 5SOS book.”

“Your 5SOS book?” Ashton repeats, sitting cross-legged on the floor. Luke sits beside him, and Alex stares at them for a moment before shaking his head.

“You know I’m, like, a grown-up, right? I shouldn’t be forced to sit on the floor with you spry motherfuckers.” Despite this, he eases himself to the carpet, stretching his legs out next to Ashton’s knee. He retrieves a familiar notebook from inside his guitar case — Ashton recognizes it from past writing sessions. “My 5SOS notebook,” Alex explains, waving it at them. “Where I put all the stuff I write with you guys.”

“Aw, he has a notebook just for us,” Ashton coos, nudging Luke gently with his shoulder. Luke huffs a tired laugh.

“I’m organized,” Alex says pointedly. Ashton grins. “Anyway, I was looking through it when you went to get Luke, and it has all the stuff from our first writing sessions ever, remember that? Five hundred years ago, or something?”

“Something like that,” Luke says. Ashton rests a hand on Luke’s knee, almost unconsciously.

“Long Way Home,” Alex muses, and hands off the notebook to Ashton. “You almost made me cry with that one.”

“What?” Luke says dimly. The page is covered in scribbles, many of them crossed out, and it’s faded with time and wear. Still, Ashton can make out Alex’s messy handwriting — Long Way Home (?) across the top, and underneath, (love song to the boys).

“Not in a bad way,” Alex says. “It was just — I don’t know. It’s like watching your kid sibling enter high school. I’d already done it, and seeing you guys do it — I mean, I knew you’d be a smash. I wished I’d had someone telling me, you know, take it slow. You don’t need to grow up so fast.” Ashton studies the page, Luke peering over his shoulder at the words. REMEMBER: SLOW THE FUCK DOWN! it says under the song title, and immediately beneath that, no one let these boys grow up before they’re ready. “I know it’s your song, but I like to think of it as my song to you,” Alex says, and when Ashton looks up at him he’s grinning shamelessly, but there’s not a hint of insincerity on his face.

“You wrote this about us?” Luke repeats, incredulous, running his fingers over the page as reverently as if it were the Bible, instead of some ratty ten-year-old notebook.

“Kind of,” Alex says. “You wrote it about yourself. I just helped.”

“The bridge,” Ashton remembers. “We’re just taking it slow. You wrote that part. You fucking sneak.”

Luke shakes his head, and when Ashton turns to look he’s smiling. This one isn’t like the one from before; it goes far past his eyes, pulling up every part of his face, loosening muscles that have probably been stagnating for weeks. 

“I just thought you might want to know,” Alex says. “I played it for the band — mine, I mean — and the moment they heard it, they knew. But, you know. We get it. We got it then, and we get it now.” A hint of timidity now curves itself into Alex’s smile. It’s not a familiar look. “I don’t think you really did take it slow, actually. Ignored your own music and shot straight to fame, but whatever, it’s none of my business.”

Luke actually laughs. The sound goes straight to Ashton’s heart, gives it wings, eases an ache he hadn’t even really known he’d had, and the energy of the room shifts. Ashton thinks maybe he’s the only one who feels it, but it’s definitely different.

“We’re taking it slow now,” Luke offers, sweeping a hand around the room. The other hand settles on top of Ashton’s, on his knee. Unthinkingly, Ashton flips his palm up, threading their fingers together. “Just took us some time to realize we needed it.” 

“Well, better late than never.”

“Yeah,” Luke says. It seems mostly to himself.

“So,” Ashton says. “Not that that wasn’t super sentimental, and I will be needing photos to send to Mike and Calum, but I feel like we should maybe try to write?”

“Yeah, okay. Give it back.” Alex snatches his notebook back, flips to a blank page, pulls out a pencil.

“Let me grab my guitar,” Luke says, and pushes himself to his feet, abruptly severing the connection between their hands. Alex’s eyes travel around the room, but Luke’s guitar is missing from its usual spot on the wall.

“It’s in his room,” Ashton explains. Luke drags his fingers across Ashton’s scalp as he leaves, a tingling trail in their wake. 

“He’s been pretty bad, huh,” Alex says in a low voice. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone so…”

“Listless?” Ashton suggests bitterly. “I know. He’s been bad. But that was good. I haven’t seen him smile like that in ages.”

Alex shakes his head. “I was so worried that this would happen to you,” he says. His tone is almost mournful. “Maybe I should have done something more, I just thought —”

“Dude, stop,” Ashton says. “There’s really no point. You’re not responsible for us. As much as you probably wish you were. We made these decisions, and this is our life. It’s not all bad. It’s not even mostly bad.” At Alex’s skeptical expression, Ashton rectifies, “It’s usually better. You caught us at a rough time.” 

“I’m sorry,” Alex says.

“Don’t be sorry. Fuck, man, just don’t be sorry for anything.” It’s pointless, is the thing, and Ashton had meant what he said. Alex isn’t responsible for their growing up. Nobody is but themselves, and — and despite everything, despite the burning, piercing anguish that sometimes balloons in his chest, threatening to drown him, if he could go back he wouldn’t really change anything. There are downs, and they are low; but there are also ups, and those are too high to surrender. Ashton knows he’s lucky. If he’s going to be depressed, he may as well be doing the job of his dreams.

“I’m smarter than you, you know,” Alex says, with a hint of a mocking smile teasing at his lips. “And so much older.”

“More susceptible to damage, you mean. Let’s see you crowdsurf nowadays, grandpa.”

“I’m seriously gonna fucking poison you.”

“I’d like to see you try.”

“I know where you live, you —” 

“That’s nothing, I could gather your whole band —”

“Just because your band fucked off to Australia —” 

“Alright, lads,” Luke interjects, returning with his guitar and the notebook Ashton had seen on his bed. “Enough fighting over me. I assume that’s what was happening.”

“If it was, I think I was winning,” Alex says immediately.

“Doubt it,” Luke says. “Not likely to leave Ashton that easily, am I?”

Alex inclines his head. He knows when he’s been beaten, evidently. “I surrender,” he says.

Ashton looks at Luke, and Luke is deliberately not looking at him, pink staining his cheeks. But the corners of his mouth are tugging themselves unwillingly into a smile, and Ashton breathes out and resists the urge to kiss Luke’s cheek, because he can see the sun coming out, finally, and it’s going to be a beautiful fucking day from here on out.

#uhh i really don't know what tws to put on this #if any?? #depression tw #but i think thats a given cos its. u know. emo lashton #luke hemmings #ashton irwin #lashton #lashton fic #5sos #5sos fic #fic #my fic #emo lashton #ALEX GASKARTH #hes in it baby!!! lil sneak peek in case ur reading the tags before u read the fic #shoutout to meghna and maggie for the long way home thing #that i 100% stole from you guys #queueing this so idk when itll post #but hopefully by the time it does ill have posted something non-emo lashton in the interim #cos this is frankly getting ridiculous #q #anonymous #ask #answered