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#like correct me if im wrong about the books bc it's been a minute
sukibenders · 3 months
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One thing that was weird to me in an interview Rick made after the Medusa episode was when, in regards to the changes from the books and how Annabeth instantly figured out where they were, he says around the lines of "Oh she's a daughter of Athena, goddess of wisdom, so why didn't figure this out sooner in the books" or something like that (correct me, politely, if I am wrong). And, to that, while I understand wanting things to be different from the books it's also important to note that isn't it implicitly stated that, in the books, both Percy and Annabeth were under some sort of magical spell that basically had them throwing out basic thinking out the window? And also weren't they literally starving after having little to nothing to eat for hours? And also, again, they were kids! They probably aren't going to figure things out right away no matter how smart, especially when hungry!
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mai-sau · 3 years
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Prompt "give me attention" for kidnap family?
"haha, im gonna take it easy with prompts this time around, only a few hundred words -" cue spongebob title card "2.3k words later"
seriously tho thank you for the prompt!! (and sorry about the wait!) i had fun working on this one bc well i love any chance to write about this lil family of murderers and tiny bois :') hope u enjoy!!
Prompt: "Give me attention."
“Nelyo.”
“Nelyo.”
“Ne-”
Thump. Maedhros slammed his book shut. A puff of dust wheezed out from the crusty pages; Maglor could make out the swirl of particles flying about in the dim shafts of sunlight peeking into his brother’s study from windows that he was sure were clean at some point in their existence.
Said brother tossed a glare over to Maglor from the other side of his desk.
“You’re allowed to be here. Quietly.” Maedhros threw a pointed look towards the abandoned scroll in Maglor’s hands.
“But I’m so very lonely, Nelyo,” Maglor pouted, and dropped the scroll on the desk. The parchment rolled out towards Maedhros, whose face was fast approaching the same shade as his hair. “Besides, I’ve already taken care of all my correspondence for the day. Nothing much else to do, really, but seek out the company of my darling brother.”
“I’m older than you,” Maedhros grit out, rubbing his temple in terse little circles. Which one of them he was reminding Maglor couldn’t say.
“Only by a few years,” Maglor teased. He let the corners of his lip curl up - he was well aware this made him look like “a cat about to feast on the fattest saucer of milk it’s ever conned” according to his brother, and that was why he did it.
On top of that dusty old book, Maedhros’ fingers twitched. Got you.
“Come on, Nelyo,” he whined. “Give me attentiooon.”
Maedhros threw him a positively hateful look, but Maglor knew he wouldn’t throw him out just yet. By this point, Maglor liked to think he knew his brother well enough.
There were some things he didn’t, of course, and this was fine. When his brother would wake and traipse out to the courtyard in the dead of night, staring at the moon hungrily for hours and hours as if he would never glimpse its light amidst the pitch dark again; when one of the many elves around Amon Ereb would do something wrong - not when one of their craftsmen made the same excited little exclamation as Curvo used to, or hunters fletched their arrows just how Tyelko did, Maglor understood these, at least - but a request phrased too sweetly, an abrupt movement, a smile too wide, and Maedhros’ throat would tighten, his words clipped, before excusing himself to go lock himself in his room for an hour, or two, or three: these parts of his brother Maglor may never know.
But he knew much, or at least enough. A few months after they’d taken in the twins, Maglor had just finished mopping an explosion of jam on the dining floor and sweeping up the shards of what was once the hefty jar that contained it. He’d first gently let Elros know that if they wanted food, they need only ask; he’d then let him know that no, of course they wouldn’t cast him out for breaking the jam jar, with no small amount of tears or internal panic on either end of that conversation.
By the time Maglor slunk into Maedhros’ study that evening to go over reports from around the fortress, he was maybe a bit tired. When Maedhros told him to wait for just a few minutes while he wrapped something or other up, Maglor might’ve let slip a touch of petulance and no small amount of theatrics into his voice when he asked when his dear Nelyo could spare just a moment for his poor baby brother, simply wilting away from the neglect.
Maglor had frozen, fearful of what his second-most severe brother would have to say in response to - well, whining. He couldn’t even remember the last time he’d let himself do so. Oh, he’d been quite the brat in Valinor, and used to be quite proud of that fact, thank you. Each and every one of his brothers’ last nerves practically had his name on it. But it seemed ever since they arrived here, it was as if they simply couldn’t afford the waste of time. Ribbing was a favored pastime of his in Aman, but Beleriand offered no such frivolities.
But living with the twins, putting on playful words and coaxing laughter from two young faces that Maglor couldn’t bear to see two seconds from breaking anymore, had apparently loosened his discipline.
He’d thought Maedhros would treat him to one of his signature frowns, barking at him that neither of them had time to make things any harder for each other, but instead he’d… laughed. Just the slightest huff of air, yes, but a laugh nonetheless. Maglor hadn’t heard his brother laugh since…
Well, if anything, he was honoring his cousin’s memory.
So Maglor experimented over the years, let a few more teases and whines slip into his day-to-day interactions with Maedhros. His brother had since mustered a valiant effort to act annoyed, but Maglor could still catch a muffled chuckle or smothered grin here and there.
So. All in all, he’s sure he knows his brother pretty well at this point, and Maedhros was not troubled (bad), just bothered (good).
Which, of course, meant they could continue to play; Maglor would show no mercy.
“Please? Please, please? Just a smidgen of tender love and care from my dearly beloved big brother?” Maglor asked, eyes wide and pleading, hands clasped in front of him as he leaned over the desk. His hair, inky black, spilled all over his scroll.
Maedhros’ nose twitched. His right ear flicked. Oh yes. He was close to a chuckle now, he could tell. His dearly beloved big brother stood no fucking chance.
“Oh dear Eru, let my brother pay attention to - MANWË’S TITS!” Maglor shrieked, springing up from his seat after spotting a dark shadow peeking through the window.
His brother whirled around. Quick as a viper, his hand darted out to grasp the hilt of his sword. Despite this, Maglor could hear a choked noise he was more than halfway certain was the chuckle he had so desperately hunted. Oh well.
A chubby face stared right back at them, eyes round as saucers. Wait, make that two faces.
Both Maglor and Maedhros sagged with relief.
“Elros, can you please come in?” Maglor croaked, feeling five feet to the left of his physical body. “You too, Elrond.”
The two of them nodded bashfully, heads bobbing as they fumbled over to the glass. And they were… flapping. Each twin sported small brown wings on their back, looking much like the falcons Tyelko used to play with as a child. Maglor supposed, thinking of a great bird soaring away over the sea with light itself clutched tight in its talons, maybe they should have expected this one in particular.
Elros pushed once, twice at the windows, tiny arms straining against the pane and looking more panicked by the second. Behind him, Elrond simply pointed to the - oh, the window latch. Yes.
Maedhros stood up and flicked it open. Elros came tumbling through, nearly bashing his skull on the desk before Maedhros caught him midair.
Elrond flew in smoothly and landed on Maglor’s empty chair, wings neatly folding in. Maedhros dumped Elros on his own chair. His wing smacked Maedhros’ arm by mistake.
“We talked about this. No new shapeshifting without me or Maglor there,” Maedhros said, fixing each of them with a stern look.
Both the twins looked down at this. Elrond wrung his little wrists.
“We’re sorry!” Elros burst out, tears welling up in his eyes. “We won’t do it again, promise!”
“That’s what you said last time, sweetheart,” Maglor told him.
“And the time before that,” Maedhros grumbled.
“What we’re saying, dear, is that we understand that you’re sorry. But keeping your word has to take first priority,” Maglor explained softly.
Maedhros coughed.
“Or, er, not doing it again,” Maglor corrected. “That’s what counts.”
“We understand,” Elros sniffled. “It’s just, we wanted to hear, but you weren’t there to check with, because well, you were here, and, well, um, yes -”
“Bringing us to the next point of order,” Maedhros rumbled. He raised a brow at both of them. “Eavesdropping. We have also been over this.”
Oh dear. Elros looked like he was about to drown in a puddle of tears. Maglor rubbed a hand between his shoulder blades soothingly, careful of the new feathery appendages.
Thankfully, Elrond stepped in. “We remember, it’s not nice because we like to be in private sometimes and it’s not fair for us to not let other people be too,” he recited shyly. “Um, we just… we know you both meet up a lot like this, and we know it's important… but… um…” His lip trembled; his voice cracked. “Do you... talk about us? Do you not want us to hear because it’s bad? Because we can do better!” He promised quickly, eyes wide and wet. “Elros is getting really good at his music lessons, he’s practicing a lot! And I’m working on my writing lessons every day!”
Something in Maglor’s chest twisted. “Oh, honey, no -”
But his brother beat him to the punch. Striding out from behind the desk, he knelt down in front of Elrond. “Can I hug you?” he asked very quietly.
Elrond bit his lip and nodded. Without another word, Maedhros wrapped him up in his arms.
They stayed like that for a moment, Maedhros’ hulking frame wrapped around Elrond’s body, like a drape of russet locks, leather and rich furs. When his brother finally pulled away, he gave a heavy look to both children.
“We will never give you away because you’re not good enough. Alright? You will always be good enough. Both of you,” he told them. He reached out and covered Elrond’s tiny hand with his own, fingers curling around and intertwining. “And not because you’re caught up on your lessons, or do what we say.”
“Though those are certainly nice,” Maglor added. He flashed them a teasing grin before taking care to soften his expression once more, and laid a gentle hand on Elros’ shoulder. “You will always have our love. And nothing, not even the worst jam spill, or missed harp lesson - don’t think I didn’t notice that last week, dearest - can ever reach in and steal it. It is your’s by blood and birthright.”
“Love you,” Elros sniffled. Elrond echoed him, voice no less wobbly.
Maedhros gifted them with a small smile. “Love you both, starlights.”
“And -” Elros started, hiccuped, and continued. “And same for me too. Nothing can change that! I’ll always love you two.”
Maglor felt a pang of sickly guilt invade his chest and looked away. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Maedhros stiffen.
“Me too,” Elrond said, voice suddenly clear. Maglor glanced at him and met a gaze that seemed years ahead of its time; he froze, rooted to the spot. “We’ll always love you no matter what you do.”
“Well -” Maglor started. “That’s…”
“No need to worry about us,” Maedhros recovered quickly, waving his hand. “Now then, it’s nearing bedtime, hm?”
“But wait!” Elros cried. “What were you two talking about then?”
“Yes! We saw Atya going like this,” Elrond clasped his pudgy hands together and shook them. “And his voice sounded all funny, and then he prayed to Eru about Atar paying more attention to Manwe’s t-”
“ALRIGHT!” Maglor yelped, clapping his hands. His face must’ve been steaming, his cheeks were burning, oh stars - “Bedtime!”
“But we want to know why you were saying all those funny things,” Elros complained loudly. His voice slipped into a high pitched whine, dripping with petulance. “Nelyo, Nelyo, give me attentioooon -”
“I do not sound like that!” Maglor gasped, scooping up a giggling Elrond to be carried to bed.
“I do not sound like that!”
Maglor turned around, gaping. That was not Elros’ voice.
Maedhros stared back. His eyes glinted with mirth and the most shit-eating grin curled his lips. In his arms was a starstruck Elros, who looked no less shocked than if the clouds themselves had just burst into song and danced a lively jig. And quite frankly, Maglor would be less surprised.
Maedhros dealt him one last smirk before twirling on his heel and walking out of the room to go deposit one elfling in his bed. Maglor still had the other, who poked his cheek.
“Atya? Are you okay?”
Slowly, ever so slowly, Maglor felt a smile grow across his face. His eyes stung with tears. He quickly wiped them with his sleeve before they could fatten and spill over his cheeks and probably make Elrond worry even more.
“Wonderful, dear.” He frowned for a second, considering. “Although I think there is a dreadful amount of mockery in my future.”
He looked down at Elrond. His son merely tilted his round head, offering a blank look. Maglor sighed happily. “But that’s okay.”
XXX
In time, it became clear that there was no need to worry about the looming threat of brotherly teasing paid back in full; Maedhros may have been looser with his laughter, but even this was a rare occasion still. Maglor did not mind, for any time he saw his brother’s eyes alight with anything other than fatal passion was a gift.
The true threat that lurked within Amon Ereb made itself known eventually.
Two weeks later, Maglor was scurrying to meet up with one of the smiths to discuss pending repairs but stopped short in front of a small figure in the courtyard blocking his path.
“Not now, sweetheart, Atya’s very busy,” Maglor told Elrond, harried, ready to flag down someone on the way to attend to whatever his son needed.
And then it happened. Elrond’s face crumpled just so. His eyes widened: big, round, and wet. His lip wobbled. When he opened his mouth, his voice took on a tone so absolutely, horribly pitiful that Maglor half-suspected the echo of Lúthien herself lived in his words.
“Please, Atya,” he begged, every word a death sentence. “Give me attentiooon.”
Oh Eru, Maglor despaired, even as he opened his arms for an evil little elfling to leap into, repairs forgotten. I’ve made a monster.
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youranxiousnerd · 3 years
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Showtime Thoughts
bc i am in love with julia lester
spoilers below
First off, why is this episode so short?
ngl i forgot mazzara was a regular
ricky ded besties
awww nina and the letters 
she looks very good in her dress
ashlyn and ricky look so good
“We’re screwed!”
ash and ricky are too funny like where were they this season?
chaotic and pretty best friends
sidenote, why did they go see north high’s production? 
oh my god ricky and nina are talking
SEBLOS IN THE BACKGROUND
i am taking what i can get
RICKYS FACE WITH THE CARD!!!!!!!!
my favorite part of the episode
his makeup looks very good
he looks very good
as @organic-guacamole said, he is very pretty
its been like three minutes and it already is so chaotic
yessss kourtney’s mom!!!
so howie and kourt are fine? gah since when?
“look for the shortest fork” mood
I CANNOT TAKE EJ SERIOUSLY HE LOOKS LIKE AN ANGRY BIRD
big bird ej comin at you
oh
PORTWELL DATE
wait isnt this ejs last show? is he going to miss his last afterparty for a date?
true love bitches
GINA MY LOVE
“Is he with us?”
NORTH HIGH SET OUR BEST BOI ANTOINE ON FIRE APS GET READY
seb being a supportive boyfriend is everything i needed
jenny is frazzled
i love how all the techie turned actors are nervous at some point during the episode
REDLYN CONTENT
awww thats so cute love the callback!!!
ooo howie is here
love how the writers leave a cliffhanger and then close the book before it turns to tragedy with one line
mazzara and ej, thats it
jenn what
why is mike there?
that was so unnecessary like aren’t mike and jenn over?
LILY
“did we forget to build a moat around the school” 
let ricky be single challenge
she just said “lol” i cant
props to ricky for keeping calm during the show after he saw mike and jenn
ah so lily is a child of divorce?
“lily scram”
RICKY AFTER THE CURTAIN OPENS WHY IS THIS FUNNY
STOP MAZZARA IS THE VOICE OVER
HE SOUNDS REALLY GOOD
how did ricky do that so fast-
put on gloves over the cast, makeup, and a mask?
i dont work with costumes 
AMERICA EXPLAIN
The one scene we get from the show...
Yay Steph!!!!
“Big Red has not thrown up in twenty minutes” ashlyn’s little smile
“she heard wrong”
someone please explain how spotlighting the judge is a good idea it makes it seem like things went wrong
“Carlos is a seasoned professional” honey carlos is on the verge of a mental breakdown
“He says help
Communication
Seb translating for Carlos is beautiful dramatic, yes, but im right. 
im so proud of them. they go from not talking for a week to seb being able to tell how carlos is feeling based off a stoic expression.
SOULMATE SHIT
IM SORRY NO BOP TO THE TOP CALLBACK
LIKE NONE
WHO WANTS TO RIOT WITH ME?!?!
wait so carlos goes from on the verge of a mental breakdown to full on performing and speaking?!?!?!? Speaking well too, not stumbling.
he looks so comfortable on stage when not even ten minutes ago he looked like he was going to vomit?
h e l p
ashlyn’s little laugh!
NINI IS A FORK IM LAUGHING THIS IS GREAT
big red lookin’ at his girl
ricky what are you doing?
ASHLYN AND GINA
I QUIT THEY’RE ADORABLE
GET IT KOURTNEY
howie’s little mouth drop
i cant with sebs costume i should not be laughing how is he able to do a kick line
ASHLYN MY LOVE
be our guest was enjoyable. it had a lot of moving parts. frankie and dara sounded really good. it’ll probably grow on me the more i listen to it.
is it just me or did be our guest lack some energy?
NATIALIE IS SO AGGRESSIVE
awww gina bb
portwell!!
“my mom sent me jordan fisher”
big red and ricky!!!
...what is big red doing? has he been faking sick?
“PLEASE EVERYONE REMAIN IN THE SAME ROLE YOU STARTED IN” 
BEST LINE OF THE SEASON OMFG 
alright what the hell is up with howie?!?
kourtney is so excited and then downer howie comes to ruin it
nina just write “thanks for being the best bro and glad youre not dead”
btw kourtney and gina look really good in their costumes
ASHLYN!!!!
SHES SO PRETTY THANK YOU
redlyn!!
gina and jamie!!! 
he looks so proud
glad gina gets to see her family!
cute scene, jordan is a nice addition!
RICKY AND THE BOWL
julia lester is killing it with the vocals
big red is so in love
seb bouncing in the costume 
“she’s never looked at me that way before” evil smirk
PORTWELL GLANCES
my heart fricking stopped when carlos went on stage 
being early on your cue/missing is awful would highly not recommend
a bop to the top callback after this would have been perfect
those harmonies!!
THEYRE SO IN LOVE
ummm phone call?
CHIPS BIG SCENE
...why wasn’t seb cogsworth? 
alright that was really good. everyone (even the backup) sounded really good. portwell rights! ashlyn rights! kowie rights! acting rights! 
so mazzara and jamie?
Ashlyn is the perfect Belle fight me
“Eat it Zackey Roy!” how about “yay kiddos, nice job!”
ej’s little dance
“bc you’re ginas brother” 
he is enamored by her it is adorable
EJ CASWELL RIGHTS
“hey, jordan fisher, would you like to f up one of three stableish ships in hsmtmts?” “sure, im in!”
ej!!!
aww hopefully he doesnt take the conversation too heart. they both like each other so much.
Portwell is so enjoyable to watch.
return of the bro
ej go get your girl dont worry about her brother please
SOMEONE TOUCHED THE PROPS
all hands on deck
“Can you just jump off something high”
I seem to remember Ricky falling from something high last episode, is that correct? 
She tells this to one of her most UNSTABLE kids
Oh shit
Miss. Jenn
Wtf
like what the actually hell
look at the kids faces they’re heartbroken
Miss. Jenn why. You’re stressed about the show, but you’re not performing it. They are. They have to worry about lines and cues and pitches, not you. Miss. Jenn has literally gone at the kids this season. Opening night speech too Ash and Ricky, shutting Seb down, that comment. She has become obsessed with the Menkies and North High. It has gotten really bad. These kids have put everything into this show, even their relationships (both platonic and romantic) and that is how you repay them? 
I didn’t think they would address this, I lost hope after last week but I am so glad they’re going too.
Someone send Seb after Miss. Jenn please, let him rip into her, he would do very well.
Miss. Jenn is supposed to be the role model and she just told a kid to jump off something high.
nina has been a godsend this episode, props to her!
haven’t been the biggest nini fan this season (off and on for me), but she was very behaved this episode. 
if there is anything the east high kids are good at, it’s bullshitting their way out.
“aim for my face” character growth
I KNEW IT
LILY WHY HOW WHEN WHY 
WTF THEY END THERE I CANNOT WITH CLIFF HANGERS
I liked the episode. Didn’t love it, but liked it. I really wish we got to see more acting, like we didn’t even see Big Red and E.J go on stage. Not even the iconic yellow dress. Some of the drama is so unnecessary, like why Mike and Jenn? What is with the Kourtney and Howie drama the writers insist on having, can’t they just be happy?
Besides the whole harness incident (burn that harness and mask it is causing so many problems) the production went very well, too well. This is East High we’re talking about.
Promo thoughts because what
oo they’re sneaking, maybe Big Red’s thingy
YES ASHLYN GETTING THE LOVE SHE DESERVES
oo Kowie confession?
portwell please be okay
what is up with carlos’ hair?
so seb, miss. jenn, and carlos scene? this has the potential to be very beautiful.
“It’s not over” not this again... 
i’m thinking carlos and seb are going to talk to miss jenn.
Sidenote, if we do not get a good seblos scene I will riot.
Hopefully Miss. Jenn apologizes with a billion sorrys
rini you just broke up please dont get back together 
im scared
if it is a scene where they close the book i will be very happy
Are we getting a flash forward scene? I’m pretty sure Miss. Jenn said Menkies aren’t till two plus weeks after the show.
We know based off the promo pics Ej and Gina are at the cast party, what went wrong?
Wait do we not get to see the finale of the show?
We better see the goddamn transformation
how does lily home and core four song fit in? im more curious about the lily one.
In conclusion, I am not ready for this to be over and the transformation needs to be sent to hell.
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“this scamdemic was planned and designed to destroy small business” statement invalid. the pandemic is real and all it did was show how many shitty many types of business owners are towards their employees in regards to low paying jobs/not paying correct wages (especially in the hospitality industry)…. and you, gary, don’t like the fact that your fucked up underhanded way of treating and paying your staff while begging them to keep working through the pandemic has been exposed. and now you’re throwing a fucking hissyfit because now no one wants to work for you. and so many of your staff have left because they realised working for you during a pandemic, or working for you in general is not how they want to spend their limited free time any longer, francine. they realised, unfortunately for you, that they’re worth more than the $16.23 an hour (but should be around $25p/h bc most of your staff are in their 20s) that you’re underpaying them and overworking them till the point of exhaustion due to your belief in hustle etc culture and the general overwork yourself til you burnout or die trying/pull yourself up by your bootstraps bullshit rhetoric is no longer/was never worth their mental and physical health and time in the first place.
and plus, on top of that, you obviously don’t care about others with your anti-mask and anti-lockdown spiels on covid posts. we do not “need to be freed from the scamdemic so i (you) can make money again! no masks! no social distancing!”. and that’s why no one wants to work for you. because you actively want to harm your workers and customers/clients, bonita/darren.
like don’t get me wrong. i get that there’s probably plenty of probably honest and nice small business people who are currently heavily struggling during lockdowns rn here in australia, and also worldwide…. but whenever i see some jackass small business person (or supporters of small business say the opening comment) like i did the other day on a fb post about the greater sydney etc lockdown…. they automatically go down as a fucking asshole in my book.
because the pandemic is not a “scam” sent out to “destroy” your ability to make money and profit and to treat your workers like shit. it should be a time that you SHOULD ACTUALLY be caring about your LOCAL COMMUNITY like you falsely claim you do by running your small business….. but if you want to put yourself, your clients and your staff ALL at risk by being a fucking anti-mask/vaxx etc fucking moron because “my nail salon is an essential service!!!! how DARE they close me down again for a month or so!!!” (there was literally a whiny article about this a few weeks in my local newspaper- a nail artist in my area bitching that “oh my nail salon isn’t an essential service but BCF (an outdoors leisure store here in australia) is!!! what the hell, nsw gov???!! getting your nails done properly is obvs more of an essential service than a camping store!!” which i agree that bcf shouldn’t be classed as an essential store either- like what the fuck even??? but still) because all you want is the money- then you’re selfish asf.
again, don’t get me wrong, i know the federal gov and also the nsw state gov here in australia rn is being awful with covid payments, refusing to reinstate the original covid payment from last year and also the job keeper payment at the full rate from last year. but that doesn’t mean you or any other small business in the service industry deserve/s to open your/their nail business or your/their cafe at full capacity during a lockdown bc “wah wah im a small business person everyone should care about me!!! this SCAMdemic needs to end now!!! (so i can go back to underpaying but overworking my staff)”.
and i know these small business people need to eat…. but if you’re in a high contact field like the beauty industry or hospitality or even retail, why the fuck are you so desperate to put your clients/customers, yourself and your workers at risk just so you can file jemima’s nails, miranda??? or for you to yell at your new recruit cassidy for not getting an order correct and then take it out of her tips or some other underhanded bullshit like that at your shitty burger joint, damien??? or just randomly toss a worker out on the street because they were 5 minutes late to their shift or w/e at your independent clothes shop, rita??? just fucking work with the no contact/social distancing and delivery rules, you selfish fucks. hopefully it’ll end at the end of august. and people will remember just how fucking belligerently and petulantly awful you were during this time, both locally and nationally (since you decided to comment on a national news post on social media, frank/sandra).
but anyway yeah. this has been bothering me for days now…. ever since i saw a comment on a news update on the lockdown of nsw on the weekend or whatever and some jackass middleaged dude said the opening comment. like no, fred, the pandemic wasn’t “planned to destroy small business” or the like. get your head out of your ass and actually fucking care about other people rather than the profits of your business or just business’s profits in general, for fucks sake.
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korissideblog · 3 years
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[slams my guitar into the stage bc im past my teen years and yet still full of unbridled teenage rage]
so this ending is dumb and stupid and I hate it 😭 pretty much the plan for this fic was just a bunch if monologuing, and I didn’t know how I was gonna end it till I was. ending it.
ok, groveling aside, fic uses characters labled in part 1. I’m very sleepy. Here’s part 2 of
The Hedonist
“Jetsam Kisa?”
“Yes.” Aito shuttered, as if a sudden cool wind had blown through the room. “He was my best friend… and… well look at me now.”
Normally when this was said by someone draped in silk and gold, it was supposed to be a positive thing, but the pain in Aito’s face told the real weight of it all. How heavy the luxury really was.
“I’m sorry.”
“No need to be.” Aito mumbled, quickly waving off the comforting words. “You haven't done anything to cause it.”
“I'm not sorry for something done wrong, I’m sorry that I can’t help you through it.” Sakura said, her voice lowering as she explained herself, frowning a bit as Aito finally removed his hand from her’s.
“Again, no need.” Aito repeated, stepping back from the settee. “Despite appearances, I’m fairly settled in it. Despite… everything...” she said, gesturing vaguely. “I know who I am. And who I am is a villain.” a small smirk tugged at Aito’s lips as Sakura handed the book back. “I’d even go to say I'm your best villain.”
“I’m not one to disagree, pet, but may I ask,” Sakura continued, watching Aito over her shoulder. “Why would you label yourself so?”
“Simple.” Aito chuckled, walking the book back to the shelf it belonged to. “Given my background, I know more about any hero we encounter than anyone else.”
Sakura squinted as Aito slipped the book back into the empty spot. “Given your background?” she repeated.
“As a past student of UA, I’d say I know most of the heroes out there- and their abilities- fairly intimately.” Aito hummed, pleased with the shocked face Sakura made when he turned to face her.
“Checkmate… you have a long leash- I let you associate with who you please, I let you go and come from this place as you wish, you have more say in my plans than I afford to many- but… I hope you understand my… insecurity in this.” she said, lowering her voice as if Aito’s education was something to be kept secret. “The implications alone are dizzying.”
“I know, but believe me, Sakura san.” Aito said, his face falling back into its usual stoic expression. “I buried my sympathies for my classmates a long time ago.” Sakura still felt a tinge of nervousness, but it melted away as Aito returned to her side. “I do what I want now, without regard for good or bad. Interesting how I seemed to fall right in line with people like you.” he hummed hurmously, patting Sakura’s shoulder in a rare display of affection.
“I’d say.” Sakura laughed as Aito quickly removed his hand. “Interesting though, that people’s suffering is what you want.” she mentioned, tapping her cheek as if considering it. “Masochist.”
“The word you’re looking for is sadist.” Aito corrected her. “The correct word is schadenfreude- but I prefer hedonist.” Aito noticed Skaura’s eyebrow raise minutely, as if asking a silent question. “Hedonism being the philosophy of pleasure. Though not a slave to my whims, I still try to give myself anything I want. My goal is to maximize pleasure, and I think I do it well.” she explained further. “Villainy… Well, if heroism was this fun, I would be a hero.” he paused, shrugging, “but it’s not… so I’m not.”
Sakura smiled, seemingly pleased with the answer as she resettled herself on the settee. “Authur Ashe once said ‘True heroism is remarkably sober, very undramatic. It is not the urge to surpass all others at whatever cost, but the urge to serve others at whatever cost.’ I believe myself heroic, at least in the sense that I serve villainous causes.” Sakura reasoned, purposefully perverting the message “But you… you don’t serve anything but yourself?” she asked, her smile widening as she looked up at the villain before her. “How do you justify it then? All of this.” Sakura continued, grinning as Aito sat down next to her feet, unusual behavior for the distant and stoic man Sakura knew. “Who does your heroism serve, pet?”
Aito paused, thinking hard as he leaned against the back of the little couch. “I don’t believe it serves you, Sakura san.” Aito reasoned, his hands slipping behind his back as if in thought. “Nor any specific villainous cause… I guess I’d say that my heroism serves my friends, my community, and my family.” Aito settled, her posture straightening as she turned to face Sakura. “As well as the heroes of Japan.” and before Sakura could even process the sentence, Aito was already tackling her to the ground.
The fight was short, Aito quickly getting the upper hand on the villain, and pinning her on her stomach as he cuffed her hands behind her back. “Checkmate!” Sakura barked, struggling under Aito’s knee. “What are you doing!”
But she was ignored, the character Checkmate immediately falling as Aito came back into the spotlight. “I already told you! I’m doing what I want!” he giggled, Sakura shouting in protest as he stood up and kicked over the settee. From his pocket Aito produced a small folding knife, which he used to cut open the bottom of the couch. Aito stuck her hand into the space and pulled out a bulky handheld radio. She flicked it on and messed with the knobs till there was a definite beep, quickly pressing the button on the side. “Iku! Yessam! My 9 months are up!” she chirped, Sakura stunned by the difference between her teammate and this new person, both somehow seeming to share the same body. “Yua Sakura is detained, I’m gonna need help for transport though.”
“Detained- you can’t detain me you brute!” Sakura barked, the chains around her wrists clattering as she fought against them. She was happily ignored by Aito.
There was a pause, and then a scratchy voice came through the other side of the radio. “Great job Aito!” the man replied, seemingly just as excited as Aito. “We'll be there in half an hour! Just keep Sakura entertained till then.”
Aito nodded quickly, looking down on the villain with a grin. “Awe you should have seen it, Ikuto! I was monologuing and everything! I was like a real life villain!” she giggled
“Troubling how well you can do that.” a different voice now, one Aito seemed just as pleased to hear. “But still impressive, good job Aito.”
“You bet your ass it was!” Aito yelled in excitement, practically bouncing in place. “Awe, I missed you guys so much! My hair is… wow, it’s rough. Blonde is not my color.” she laughed, noticing Sakura messing with the chains on her handcuffs and immediately realizing what was going on. “h-hold on there!” she barked, kicking Sakura’s side to discourage her from using her quirk against the metal.
“I-I can’t believe! You were nothing when I found you!” She yelled, curling in on herself to guard against any other attacks.
“God she’s a pain to deal with- but whatever! Jetsam! You have to take me to get my hair cut! Long is cute but it makes everything so much harder! Do you know how many times I’ve been grabbed by the hair? It’s wicked what people do to me.” he whined, glaring at Sakura before stepping away from her side.
“Sounds like a plan Aito.” Jetsam laughed, the background noise probably coming from whatever vehicle they were using to find the hide away. “Are you starting on the scene? We may not have a lot of time before the rest of the villains arrive.”
“Already on it!” Aito laughed, shoving her shoulder into a nearby bookcase and watching it fall into the ones behind it. “After this we only need to torch the place a bit, and it’ll look just like a kidnapping!” she giggled, watching all the books spill onto the floor with a chaotic glee.
“You- you traitor!” Sakura screamed from her spot on the floor, seemingly not enjoying the mess like Aito was, and still struggling against the cuffs. “I’ll destroy you- ruin you- I’ll burn- your heart.” She had actually managed to sit up by the time Aito had strolled over, but was quickly stopped by the hero.
“Awe…”Aito cooed, leaning over a bit to look the woman in the eye. “You’re cute when you’re mad, too bad you weren’t this entertaining the entire time. Hell, maybe I would have become an actual villain.” he joked dryly. “Sorry for this, but I can’t have you getting away.” Aito smirked, not looking sorry at all as he threw a punch at her temple, knocking her out cold.
“Mama always says never to hit a lady.” Aito sighed, talking back into the radio
“I think these are extenuating circumstances. Mama would understand.” Ikuto laughed, back in control of the radio. “Jetsam’s driving, we’ll be there soon. Have fun destroying the place.”
And have fun, Aito definitely did.
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atsumiye · 3 years
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hey!! :) i just found your page and your stuff is so fun! i was wondering if your 300 followers event is still open? if so, my fave color is yellow and my favorite trope is a very weirdly specific one but I swear nothing will ever get me like those cinderella story type fics where people get to know each other really well online or from a groupchat or something but they meet in a dif situation in real life and they don't realize they already know each other and have to slowly figure it out haha
hii! yup, it is still open :-) thank you so much!! this is so oddly specific and I LOVE IT. the very specific trope is adorable and i love that that was the first trope you thought of XD
KENMA KOZUME!!! there is no other correct answer.
kuroo recently broke his phone and when giving kenma his new number, he wrote it down wrong (im sorry you must know how much i love the idea of giving the wrong number...)
kenma decides to send a few texts to kuroo later that day, "are u logging on?", "hurry tf up", and lastly a funny/ horrifying meme that will most likely never leave the depths of your brain. pls after your response of another separate horrifying meme, you explain how kenma has the wrong number heeheh
this leads to a conversation about the game he was waiting for kuroo to log on to and you play it too!! so he invites you join him and also declines the call from an unknown number that he thinks is kuroo,,,,payback
you both talk for months, only knowing each other by usernames and such. never sharing your names, bc neither of you really thought about it to be honest. however, you and kenma both let each other know that due to school starting soon you wont be as free as over the summer time :-(((
you officially move into your college dorm and after moving all your stuff in your roommate tells you that they heard about a small party for all the incoming freshman, so you both decide to go!!
except, they leave you alone 15 minutes in??? so you end up with a cup in your hand on a nearby couch, next to a guy. so you try to start a conversation with him and turns out you both play the same games. discussing some game techniques, you both think the other sounds familiar. what a small world. but it ends there....for that night bc you somehow run into each other in the cafeteria, the book shop, library, and even at the small game store about a two streets away from your university. and you both keep thinking its just one big coincidence.
until you see him in your class the next week. and as the teacher drones on about making an account for this website, your eyes drift to his computer while he makes an account. and as you read the username, you think it sounds very familiar. and as you make your account, he seems to think the same thing.
wait a second, same games? same username? the familiarity of it all?this is either one weird coincidence or.......??? and you know in the movies where a little light bulb pops up and you both snap your heads towards each other? yeah that's how it all clicks. you both realize, you've literally been playing together and texting each other when you were in the same vicinity PLS.
while it kinda takes a minute for you both to register exactly what is going on, you both decide to get lunch and figure it all out. through laughs of counting how many times you interacted and didn't know he explains how he would love to get to know you better and of course you accept.
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caffiine · 3 years
Text
A BRIEF PAUSE
From my regularly scheduled content. I’ve got some shit to say, y’all (forewarning for spicy language and spoilers)
I thought about making this post on my fandom subblog but this show and this relationship have been TOO important to me for the past 8 years to not give it its proper place in my life. strap in bc im not sure how long this mf is about to be.
When i started this DUMB show at age 19 tortured soul “empath” dark academia me thought sam winchester was going to be my favourite character. and don’t @ me, i love sam now in his own right (and we deserve some SAILEEN PEOPLE). but after literally less than 5 episodes i KNEW dean’s character and his arc were going to be amazing and beautiful and he immediately became my favourite brother. The nuances of his character i.e. his shell vs his true self were so evident to me even in the first couple seasons. in my humble opinion, he had the most growth of the two brothers.
They all deserve to be happy, but for whatever FUCKING reason dean has the HARDEST TIME OF ANYONE being happy in this show. I know it’s his character. I know it was written that way. But FFS.  I kept wondering when they were going to wrap up his emotional arc and stop torturing the poor dude.
then in season 4 they introduced castiel and 1) I thought the new concept of angels as assholes was super cool and 2) I hardcore SIMPED over misha collins (still do). I watched benignly as cas and dean began to form this relationship that seemed pretty special. I started watching the show when it was in its eighth season and I binged the shit out of it for two weeks until I was caught up. By the time I was caught up I was CERTAIN there were some feelings between them and I LOVED it. I am bisexual and I was ECSTATIC for a potential queer relationship between two masculine-portrayed dudes. I went on tumblr to express my newfound theory, only to find out that this was a real THING. “Destiel” was already an idea that had absolutely and intensely BLOSSOMED in the fandom  for several seasons already. So many others saw what I saw and saw the potential of emotionally tortured/constipated “daddy’s blunt instrument” dean and the unfeeling daddy’s boy cas “crack in his chassis” Winchester being allowed to be happy together. I felt validated and hopeful. For a while.
Then it was season after season of hopefulness for them to be finally happy with each other while still fighting the ills of their world with sam and the other new members of their family that were added along the way, only to constantly have that hope seemingly teased away at the end every single time. By season 11 and the introduction of amara (not bashing, eventually loved her character and her development too) I gave up. I lost hope. I stopped watching the show. I didn’t want to keep watching my two favourite characters continuously abused by the story they were thrown into.
I know not everyone likes destiel, not everyone thought it was real. That’s chill, idc. Stories are so often meant to be (and sometimes inadvertently) left up to interpretation by the person experiencing and consuming them. It’s what’s so amazing about books and shows and movies that are able to make us feel so intensely about them and their characters. And I felt SO strongly about dean and cas. It was honestly really upsetting to me, the way the show was going with their relationship.
A while later season 13 had been going on and I started seeing some things pop up on my dash. Hopeful things. I did a bit of research and accidentally saw THE SCENE from season 12 and I couldn’t help myself. I restarted it. I watched the whole thing from the beginning again AND introduced it to my boyfriend I think partially as a way to ensure I wasn’t imagining shit (it took him awhile and a lot of me internally screaming during many scenes but by season 9 he was like “uh are they in gay love”). Fast forward to me finally catching up as season 14 was starting. I was still hopeful, somehow. And it happened AGAIN. Season 14 and the beginnings of 15 made me so sad. I HATED what they did with their relationship. I HATED the way it ended. I HATED the way dean treated cas and everyone around him. It felt like the show was taking his whole character arc back to day 1. I didn’t understand. I kept watching for a couple episodes after the big argument and cas left but the luster was gone and eventually I just stopped.
I love this show. It has meant so much to me as a story. So many of the characters are/were very dear to me. I know it’s a running joke with this show about character deaths and homophobia but the strength of the bond I felt was between cas and dean gave me a lot of hope. But it wasn’t enough. I felt betrayed one too many times. And for those of you who kept watching, for whatever reason, I don’t hold it against you. It’s still a beautiful and interesting story without cas and dean’s relationship. But I just personally couldn’t do it anymore.
I hadn’t planned on watching the rest of season 15 when it came back after pandemic hiatus, at least not for awhile. So imagine my FUCKING surprise when I was doom scrolling through twitter during election week on Thursday and I see supernatural trending right along with election shit.
What.
I couldn’t stop myself, I looked and literally SCREAMED and made my boyfriend spill his wine all over our couch. I didn’t know exactly what happened as I hadn’t seen the episode but APPARENTLY all my emotions and feelings had been at least partially vindicated. So I BOUGHT season 15 so I could finish watching where I had left off. I watched 8 episodes in less than 24hrs (don’t judge me there’s a quarantine) and I LIKED them. And it might’ve been bc I knew what was about to happen in 15 x18 but I really felt like the show was getting STRONGER as it neared its finish.
I was so excited for 15x19. I read so many posts from fellow fans, destiel and antis alike. There really weren’t a lot of bad emotions running around. Everyone seemed hopeful and excited like me.
I probably don’t need to go over 15x19 emotions but im going to anyway. I was disappointed. I was confused. I was angry. we are in season 15. The last season ever for this show that has had a HUGE following of fans who have loved it, sometimes unconditionally, sometimes even though it wasn’t the best (and sometimes less than good). A season and show that had just announced YES. CAS LOVES DEAN. ITS REAL. And I shouldn’t have to go over the nuances of why we would expect more after this, with two episodes to go before the show is done forever.
But I will bc im mad af.
Like I said in the beginning. Dean’s character arc has been incredible. His emotional growth – as subtle as it might’ve seemed – has been amazing. And dean has always been an emotional, loving person. he just felt like he wasn’t because the world made him feel that way. And that’s sad, y’all. Dean deserves to realize he DESERVES happiness. And in 15x18, we were finally heading basically directly there. With destiel, yes, but even if you’re anti, what cas said to dean about who he is and why he loves him obviously struck a fucking chord with dean. It obviously changed the way he viewed himself (RE: “that’s not who I am, that’s not who we are”).
But for WHATEVER reason that’s ALL we got in 15x19. One fucking SENTENCE about dean realizing maybe he’s not just built to kill people. And then jack leaves without a single mention of Eileen or cas or Charlie or literally anyone they ever cared about and dean rode off into the sunset alone with his brother while we watched a fucking FIVE MINUTE MONTAGE that made me want to hurl my own body into the sun they were driving toward. And cas is STILL DEAD.
BUT THERE’S STILL ONE EPISODE LEFT AND FUCK ME IF I HAVENT BEEN PAINTING ON MY CLOWN MAKEUP ALL WEEK. SO WHAT DO I WANT????
ONE: DEAN DESERVES HAPPINESS. REAL HAPPINESS. What the FUCK supernatural??? Wasn’t this the whole point of his arc??? And don’t get me wrong I REALLY want that happiness to come from Cas and a real spoken relationship of some sort between them bc it also ties in with my second point but tbh just PLEASE let dean be happy. Dean is a loving person and does everything for love as we JUST FOUND OUT. Dean would NOT be happy with everyone he’s ever loved gone for the rest of his life. I just don’t believe that’s fucking true. h elp him pls.
TWO: CAS DESERVES HAPPINESS. I know we got this whole speech about “happiness isn’t in the having it’s simply in being”  but like. Really. Castiel was supposed to be a throwaway character no one was supposed to care about. But we all cared SO MUCH that he lasted 11 SEASONS longer than intended and became a main character and an integral part of the story. Cas has arguably sacrificed more than anyone on this show. His last act was to sacrifice his life to save the man he loved. He knew where he was going. He knew he was finally going to be able to tell dean he loved him and then immediately be taken by the empty where we know now thanks to season 15 that everyone in there just gets to dream forever about their regrets and sadness. HOW IS THAT FAIR. HOW IS THAT A GOOD ENDING FOR CAS. HOW DO YOU EXPECT ANYONE – CHARACTERS AND FANS ALIKE –TO BE HAPPY ABOUT THAT. Its messed up, supernatural. Y’all KNOW it is and I hope to HIGH HEAVENS this is going to be corrected in 15x20.
THREE: give sam Eileen back. 
Well that’s all I’ve got in me, folks. I’m absolutely and intensely dreading Thursday. Im scared and nervous and obviously still angry that this is absolutely going to be the opposite of what they promised – another “game of thrones” ending. Some of y’all are giving me hope with your posts about maybe they’re trying to keep the ending a surprise and maybe cas is coming back and how can they not and why else would they have done the second to last episode like that and I hope yall are right.
Either way, im glad I am not alone with my feelings. Thanks yall for the experience of this fandom and show. Let’s stick together on Thursday, no matter our differences.
 PS stop calling jensen ackles a homophobe or ill hex you. 
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cleaduvalls · 5 years
Text
i watched “spy kids” 4 times in 1 week and here are my thoughts
carmen your nightgown is like 200 years old, get a new one
you clearly know this story by heart, you’re saying parts of it. why are you questioning what “take him out” means
a double wig should be more obvious than that
we can see that that’s a glass elevator. people can see you changing, ingrid
nice hat
why did you kill the swan
is that paul rudd???????
how are jets ripping pages out of a book
heart shaped parachutes shouldn’t be working that well
why is there a guitar on your bed. how do you sleep
i think the kids would have seen the track in the floor at SOME point
why is there a jungle gym in their house. i know they’re spies but who has a jungle gym.... in their HOUSE
carmen you’re a frog
i think juni just legitimately try to kill carmen
why are both parents going to school. is that like, a Thing????
juni how do you do that
who puts a video screen in the front seat
hey look its floop. love that guy
they’re not picking on you for the bandages, it’s cuz you brought the toys OUTSIDE your backpack. always put them inside. trust me
did his mirror just.... zoom in?????
h*ck yeah beat him up greg
do all the other kids hate him too??????
dang that hurt
“chief” that’s so white
stupid kid. his dads a spy
that floop doll isn’t even close to accurate
hey look its floop again. love that dude
Big Willy Wonka Energy
oooh skipping numbers i see. love that
why do the subtitles have “mr. floop” as his name. its just floop, yall
“sometimes in order to think big you have to think small” pretty inspirational tbh
oh hes fidgeting!!!!!! love that
woah what are you doing this is rated pg ingrid
i wish my uncles would tell me im shrinking. they just make small talk abt school 😔
this gradenko lady looks like jan from the office
hey its floop again!!!!! love that dude
yes juni. its a fire drill in your own home
these dudes have a jungle gym AND a pool. what the h*ck
why did you pull off your mustache to prove you’re not related. if anything that makes you more related. greg does that too
why did he put the mustache back ON
where did those boats come from
carmen says manual weird. man-yull
right, cuz adrenaline causes warts
“don’t touch anything” *immediately touches everything*
basic boat ettiquette: don’t shit in the boat. those toilets can’t handle anything
is that globe..... punched in???????
floop!!!!!!! love that dude
feet on the desk????? i dunno seems pretty gay
since when did carmen get keys to that
i might be wrong but i dont think thats every country
what does pressure have to do with positioning a laser
this floor is the best mechanic in the whole movie. reminds me of a richie rich comic i had as a kids
why did they not run into the wall. i wanted to see that
is the slide there when floop films his show????
HEY ITS FLOOP!!!! love that dude
theres a bunch of normal food like.... sour worms. why did they pick the slime from charlie and the chocolate factory when johnny depp finds the oompa loompas
thats a sick coat. best one in the movie
that was a good snap. nice acoustics
God what a power move. something thanos would say
listen floop i love you but thats not how you say research
fELIX NO
and hes gone. cool
did she kick the camera?????
haha author unknown. cuz hes a spy
why did you take that one specifically????? plot convenience????
he can still be a spy, just not a good one. learn to read
is that supposed to be a question?????
FUN FACT if you listen closely when carmen says “like felix said” you can hear a weird cut in “said”, almost like its a new clip
theres no keyhole
i think juni can read. why are you spelling it
did you have the floop toys in your pocket????
OKAY THIS SCENE WHERE THEY PLAY IT BACKWARDS?????? THAT MESSED ME UP AS A KID 
what do those things do?????
i can feel the pain from the fan blades
how did that break the chain????
why would you annouce that. they can hear you. just because they’re thumbs doesn’t mean they’re deaf
that’s a thing, not a place
FLOOP!!!!! ON A BILLBOARD!!!! love that dude
how are you slipping. shes holding YOU
YOU DROPPED HIM GENIUS
how do people not notice the jetpack dudes
DOES NO ONE CARE THAT CLOTHES WERE STOLEN
that’s a cute coat
why is the lady cool with carmen just... doing that
HEY I LOVE THIS SONG!!!!!!!!! AND THAT DUDE!!!!!
ofc you can’t think “straight enough” you’re gay
why is mexico sepia tone
when do you think juni had time to change and learn a new language
IF IT HURTS TO HIT HIM, S T O P
i wanna be on that merry-go-round
HOW DO YOU K N O W THAT HIS CODE NAME. WHY “MUST” IT BE HOMBRE
i love how junis just like “we already got a fake uncle”
LOOK AT HOW FLOOP IS SITTING!!!!!!!! THATS GAY!!!!!!! HE IS A HOMOSEXUAL!!!!!!!!
ALSO MORE FLOOP!!!! say it with me, LOVE THAT DUDE!!!!!!!!!!
minion looks like barry from friends
wait i lied this coat is better
we DO have uncles like that!!!!!
if your inventions are so good why is your font so BORING
hey wait carmen said that. hmmmmmmmm 🤔🤔🤔
glowsticks dont help you see like at all
the map looks like gallifreyan but its not. spy kids is older than the doctor who reboot
they go ZOOM
THATS NOT HOW YOU SAY MANUAL!!!!!!!
great job carmen YOU wrecked the plane
WHATS A REGULATOR
oh its just a breathing thing
haha pee joke. funney
where are the brains coming from???? that factory is Not Correct
if i were juni i would look back over all the floop’s fooglies tapes and see what the agents were saying backwards. once the mission was done, ofc
it took me like 5 minutes to figure out what sknaht meant the first time
SEE THIS MECHANIC IS GOOD BC NOW THERES NO PLEXIGLASS
WHY DOES NO ONE RUN INTO THE WALL
F L O O P  I S  G O D
love that dude
you discussed with the spy parents that juni watched the show. he just told you that you took his parents. you KNOW this is juni, why are you surprised that he watches it????? you already know!!!!!!
tbh i kinda want some of those colorful chains. they’d look cool somewhere
haha voice crack
no wonder your shows not doing well. those are awful times
why is there a sexy thumb nurse. why did floop make the thumb nurse sexy
use her first name?????? you’re clearly dating
!!!!!! THEY USED THE SAME TOOL MULTIPLE TIMES!!!!!! UNHEARD OF!!!!!!!
he cares so much about this show!!!!!! its so sweet!!!! love that dude
YEP THIS COAT IS BETTER, LOOKS A M A Z I N G IN A RUNNING SCENE
haha you killed carmen
ok this scene with the acid crayon is like my absolute favorite. something about using a crayon to escape and then floop (love that dude) opening the door a second later and then doing a double take. FAVE
wheres belize
ok so apparently its a country by mexico
no you CANT tell her you need to ESCAPE
we finally got a clean outside shot of the castle.... that place is wack
haha minion can’t sit in the hand chair correctly because hes STRAIGHT what a loser
hey juni HOW DO YOU DO THAT
minion you know what the robot costumes look like AND what juni looks like. dont be stupid
what..... what do you want carmen for, exactly, minion??????
floop is supportive of others’ art!!!!!!!!!!! love that dude
HE SAID “WHERE’S MOM AND DAD” LIKE THEY’RE HIS OWN PARENTS THAT’S SO C U T E
ALSO ANOTHER SCENE WITH THE GREAT RUNNING COAT
he says doppelganger beautifully
“its too late” that timing was BEAUTIFUL
you COULD take 500 brains out if you just TRIED HARDER. still love that dude
his control panel has buttons that spell “floop”
WHY CAN MINION TALK NORMAL
if its reversible why do you have it in later movies
carmen fights fake juni and juni fights fake carmen because they didnt have the fancy clone (?) technology
THREE TIMES!!!!!! THEY USED THE SAME TOOL T H R E E  T I M E S THIS HAS NEVER BEEN SEEN BEFORE!!!!!!!!!!!
nice censorship
HOW DID MACHETE SMASH ONLY THE CLEAR WINDOWS AND A L L THE CLEAR WINDOWS THERE ARE NO MORE CLEAR WINDOWS!!!!!! ANYWHERE!!!!!
wow nice 3 buttons thats totally how you hack
oh look they have all died
oh. guess not :((
machete you better rip off your mustache
HES GOING TO JUNIS LEVEL TO TALK TO HIM!!!!!!! HE RUFFLED HIS HAIR!!!!!!!!! HES GONNA MAKE A GREAT DAD!!!!!!!
wow no shit ingrid
did he leave his wart bandaid on the kitchen counter?????
ALAN CUMMING!!!! ON A CEREAL BOX!!!!
ok CLEARLY other people watch floop’s show, he’s rated number 2. kids at the school are gonna recognize juni and carmen. they better get popular
is that george clooney
well that’s not how it works in spy kids 2. or 3. or 4. or the tv show
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fairycosmos · 5 years
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whats up i am The Literal Ugliest girl i have ever seen im not even being sarcastic i am so fucking disgusting it makes me sick i hate my disgusting full of acne skin, my ugly nose, my nonexistent lips and my fat short body. i want to kill myself SO MUCH but im scared my parents will be sad. do you think they’ll get over it and i should just do it bc nothing is changing and ive been waiting for years for a change and now im 22 and im fucking tired i cant fucking breathe
hey, it's okay. listen, i'm really sorry you're in such a negative place right now and i can't imagine how hard it must be. like i can absolutely relate and i totally understand where you're coming from, but your pain is your own and i won't infringe on it. that being said, of course your parents won't just 'get over' something like that. the trouble with self destructive tendencies is that your brain will do anything to make them seem plausible. it will engage you in emotional, black and white thinking - it'll force you to believe there's no other options, it'll use your insecurities against you to the highest degree in order to blow them out of proportion and make you feel bad. your self hatred is spinning a false narrative about you. i know you know about the subjectivity of beauty, the pressure we're all under to reach impossible standards, the way they sell us these made up ideas about attractiveness because that's what makes money. you can be aware of all of that and still hate the way you look, but recognizing that there is truly no wrong way to have a physical form (regardless of your low self confidence) can really make a difference. clearly this runs deeper than your appearance, i get that. but you must understand that your conditioned mind is not reliable. ugliness is a) an inevitably for everyone since our purpose isn't constant prettiness, b) not set in stone, not defined as 'one thing', and c) not a reason to take your own life. i understand that as a woman everything seems to hinge on that, but you can find comfort and happiness regardless. others don't see you the way you see yourself, and your self perception is all messed up by your biased mindset anyway. it's something a lot of people struggle with, but there IS a balance to be found. i know it's hard, i know. but experiencing this world and trying to appreciate who you are is a million times more rewarding than punishing yourself for something so uncontrollable and insignificant and inconsistent in it's validity. youre not a walking advirtisment, your body doesn't exist to fill a quota. and that can be really difficult to accept but. it's just true, it always comes back to that fact.
you're clearly in a very intense and emotional state of mind right now, and i really don't blame you. when you're sad and dealing with mental issues and you feel like there's literally no way forward, the entire world feels like the enemy. but i'd really really urge you to take a look at your thinking patterns when you're able to, in order to realize how irrational and untrue they are. harming yourself is not the correct response to not liking your reflection. instead consider outside factors, whats influencing your opinions, what you can do to make yourself feel a little more stable in the moment (cry, write, talk to a family member or friend, take a walk.) take a breath, and be sure to remain in a physically safe environment for now. that's good enough, i promise. you're doing so much better than you think you are, just by getting through the moment. you have copious amounts of worth beyond the way you look. you were born with it and it'll never go away. you have so much to offer and to see and you should not allow the unnecessary guilt to take all of that away from you. a whole future is worth so much more than you realize. i know 5 more minutes with this feeling doesn't feel worth ten years without it. but i'm honestly telling you that there are so so so many ways to grow beyond this mindset and none of them involve hurting yourself. you don't have to do anything. you're in control, not your sadness, not your temporary feelings.
you sent this anon for a reason, and i'm unbelievably glad you did. it shows you have the ability to reach out, even if it's through an unconventional platform. so if you want to know what i really believe would be good for you, then hear me out. you need to talk to your parents and you need to look at your options in regards to seeing a professional about this. whether it's through a doctor, a counselor, a support group, a hotline. anything, there is so much available. please please please do not let the self destructive part of you write the idea off as if it's nothing. because your brain will try every trick in the book to make you think it's pointless but trying is never fruitless, not in this regard. you don't have to go into great detail, but i think it could be a real relief if you just sat your parents down and told them that you're having a really hard time, you don't know what to do, and you think you need some extra support. it is completely and utterly natural to be scared, to not want to do it. vulnerability is like that. but it's a much better form of fear than the one you'll feel by staying silent and letting this get worse and worse. the bottom line is suicidal thoughts, while somewhat common, are not normal and are an indicator that it's time to prioritize your mental health. even when everything in you is screaming at you to go the other way, to self destruct. it's hard to care about what happens to you when you just don't but i'm begging you to have some empathy for your future self, alright? that is what you're looking for here, i swear. you're going to be you for the rest of your life and while that may seem daunting right now it is something you can grow to enjoy as you create a whole lifetime of experiences beyond this pain. a professional will be able to get to the root causes of what's going on, while working with you to create a care plan so that you're prepared for these episodes in the future and showing you how to implement positive patterns into your daily life. disentangling your self worth from the way you look is not impossible and is actually very doable through small exercises and patience. minimizing the damage and building from the ground up, awakening yourself to alternative perceptions, is done through communication. it's ok if it's frustrating, it's ok if it takes time. i'm not saying you have to start loving yourself immediately, or that this will solve everything, but it is a great place to start. just making the initial choice to reach out to your parents will make a massive difference. i can't stress it enough, the importance of you realizing that your self hatred and your self perceived 'ugliness' aren't irreversible truths, they are emotional inconsistencies derived from underlying issues that can be addressed with time and small amounts of effort. where you're at right now is truly not where you'll always be no matter how much you feel otherwise. please, if you're a danger to yourself call someone and put your own physical safety first. i'm begging you, it is not going to solve anything and it is not what you deserve. you will find what you do deserve eventually but you have to stick around to see it. you're stronger than you realize. you haven't made it this far for nothing. i really hope you're alright and that you're able to talk with your parents, or that you at least consider it for now. i'm sure they'll appreciate the honesty, and that's where it all begins. just admitting to what's going on, which you've already proved your capable of. sending a lot of love to you, don't hesitate to hit me up if you need a friend. you're not alone.
https://ibpf.org/resource/list-international-suicide-hotlines
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catsbrak · 6 years
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ok this is a lot - what if richie has a little sister. and there is some situation where their parents leave town for a couple of days and richie is out for the night too like at a concert with bev or something. so they hire a babysitter (eddie) until richie comes home (richie doesn't meet him when he arrives bc he's already left) so when he gets back he's suppose to pay eddie and say thanks but when he sees him his like JAKAHDUAOAJEBYAPHF
im using georgie for this but this is.. a cute idea!!! i made it a mini fic instead of hcs im sorry
“I’ll m-meet you guys at the truck, he should be here any minute,” Bill let them know, and Richie let out an overly exaggerated sigh. It brought forth a laugh from Beverly and an eye roll from Stan.
“What kind of babysitter is this late, Billiam?? It could be an emergency. Hell, it IS an emergency, we’re gonna miss the opening band!” He complained, and Bill gave him a look. “Fine!” He exclaimed, “I’ll wait in the truck.”
When he arrived to where Mike and Ben sat, already in the truck, his only greeting to them was to flop himself into the backseat in true, dramatic, Tozier fashion. He didn’t see when the babysitter for Georgie actually did arrive, he only knew that eventually his friends piled back in and they were off.
The night was, in short, incredible. The music was great, every single one of his favourite songs had been in the set, and he and Bev had screamed along to the lyrics until their voices were nearly gone.
On the way back came the ‘who’s going to whose house’ discussion, and Bev and Richie both decided they’d stay with Bill, and they were the first to be dropped off.
Beverly was already pulling a box of cigarettes from her back pocket straight out of the truck, offering them to the boys. Bill looked tempted, but sighed.
“N-no thanks, Bev, I should go p-pay Eddie so he can g-get home.”
Richie, who was feeling more like a glass of water than a cigarette, quickly interjected as he put his hand up to decline Bev’s offer. “I’ll take care of it, Big Bill.” He suggested.
“You sure?” Bill checked, a bit surprised. When Richie insisted, he fished his wallet out, handing over the money. Richie, after looking over the cash and thinking maybe he should try babysitting, headed inside.
He made a beeline for the dining table, because there was a box of pizza on it, and he grabbed a slice.
“Georgie went to bed already,” a soft voice caused him to nearly jump out of his skin, and he followed it to the couch, where the most beautiful boy he’d ever seen in his life sat curled up with a book. The boy laughed. It brought a blush to Richie’s cheeks.
“Jesus, sorry.” The other commented, presumably about scaring him, “I really thought you were Bill.” Richie was frozen watching him for a moment, before he let out a half-hearted laugh, trying to smoothly brush his wild and sweat-soaked hair back with his free hand. No use. It was a mess.
“No… no, not Bill. You must be Eddie?” Richie tried to ignore the scratchy post-concert quality of his own voice.
“Yeah, that would be me,” he replied, “and you’re..?”
“The man of your dreams.” Richie answered without missing a beat, and Eddie raised his eyebrows, before glancing back down to his book with a quiet and unimpressed, 'wow’.
“Richie,” he quickly corrected himself with a more nervous chuckle, and Eddie peered back up at him curiously.
“Okay, Richie.” He flipped the page of his book, but his eyes remained on Richie. And Richie couldn’t help but feel a bit flushed at the way Eddie looked him over, then, as if he were sizing him up.
“Are you a friend of Bill’s?” Richie asked, and Eddie nodded. “But you didn’t come to the concert.”
“Not really my thing,” Eddie admitted, “it’s a little loud. I was much more happy to watch Georgie.” He explained further, closing his book once he’d saved his place.
“So you like kids, then?” Richie asked, a smirk making it’s way onto his face.
“I do, yeah,” Eddie told him, eying him cautiously.
“Wanna have mine?” He blurted. He couldn’t stop himself from making the joke, it was like word vomit, and the expression of confusion and slight disgust on Eddie’s face had him regretting it instantly.
But Eddie only faltered a moment before he cleared his throat, cheeks pink. He didn’t seem prepared to answer how many things were wrong with that question.
“I- I.. would rather stick to babysitting,” he said, confidence taking a moment to return to his tone. Richie felt like he needed the ability to turn invisible, really.
“I have money for you.” He said to change the subject, and hopefully end his humiliation, and Eddie looked a little baffled.
“I babysit for kids, Richie.”
“I- no, it’s- oh god, no- Bill gave me the money! It’s for Georgie.” His entire face flushed in embarrassment at the way Eddie was looking at him, heart now hammering in his chest. He handed over the money clumsily. Eddie’s confidence was back entirely now, after having seen Richie once again revert to nervous wreck.
“Thanks,” Eddie smirked, still eying him in amusement, before he stood from the couch to collect his things. Something about the way he was still grinning and teasing even after a fuck up like that had Richie really intrigued.
“I- um… listen, maybe.. maybe you’d be interested in babysitting my sister?” Richie asked, and Eddie glanced over at him in surprise.
“… I guess I could.” He replied after some silence. He was still looking at him strangely. “When?”
“… Friday?” Richie tried to keep his voice from shaking.
“Sure. Can you pick me up?” Eddie asked, and Richie assumed getting a ride was crucial to him considering he had been so late tonight. When he nodded, Eddie pulled a pen and pad of paper from the fanny pack around his waist. (Wait why did he have a fanny pack?)
When Richie received an address and phone number, a grin spread on his face.
“I like burger places,” Eddie suddenly said, and Richie looked a bit confused. However, he couldn’t get a word in when Eddie continued, “And anywhere that has milkshakes. The movies would be fine, too.”
“But I-”
“Richie Tozier, right?” He asked, and there was a pause. “You don’t have a sister.” Eddie finished easily. Richie instantly began to stutter over his words, like Big Bill, who he had assumed Eddie would have gotten that kind of information from.
Eddie pressed his fingers delicately over his lips to quiet him. Big brown eyes were trained on Richie’s, almost playful in the way they watched him. His words were more of an order than a question.
“Pick me up at seven.”
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feisties · 6 years
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TATBILIB review SPOILERS
ok here are all of my thoughts
first of all i want noah centineo to raw me he’s so fucking gorgeous
lana condor was so good for this role and she was the perfect amount of bashful and shy yet kind and independent and she’s actually ADORABLE
i’ve always love lara jean bc she is always so kind and is so dignified in her interactions with gen esp in this movie ugh yes
OK the camera work!! i was really disoriented during the first part of the movie because all of the shots were centered and you could usually only see one character aka the one who was talking. that lowkey rubbed me the wrong way and idk if it did for anyone else AND i don’t even usually care about this stuff???? i just usually like seeing also how the actors react and move as another person is talking, preferably in the same frame.
i noticed it less and less as the movie went on and i’m gonna watch it more times (duh) but i’m wondering if that’s because they made more shots including both people who the interactions are with and if that has a meaning??? or if i’m just stopped caring subconsciously. anyways.
idk there were some moments where the acting didn’t really land in the first part of the movie??
also the guy who plays josh is SO cute too im into the rumpled lanky white guy look so
im sorry but they should have cast margot better. it was distracting me the entire movie how different the actress looked from lana
THEY HAD YAKULTS IN THE MOVIE. THE KOREAN YOGURT THING I HAVE THAT AT MY HOUSE. IM SO GLAD ASIAN PEOPLE AND HABITS WERE NORMALIZED IN THIS MOVIE AND THAT THE SONG SISTERS WERENT JUST “EXOTIC KOREAN GIRLS” or “EXOTIC BIRACIAL GIRLS” HELL YES
every part of the movie was almost so accurate buuut
why . was there no lara jean driving back story. . that was such a huge part of her character. instead it just seemed like she was a bad driver . why .
super SUPER tiny complaint but i still wish peter was the one who brings up the back pocket thing. PLEASE correct me if i’m wrong but to my recollection PETER suggested putting his hand in lj’s back pocket and . idk i just liked that little sleazy yet innocent thing he did idk if i’m right that he suggested it though. it’s been a while since i read the book
also it didn’t end exactly how the book did like the last 30 minutes definitely divulged from the book but i totally get why so i don’t really care
genevieve was eh in the last scene “im not as tough as i seem” ok bbg
i just consistently found an eh vibe in her performance and just. throughout the movie w her
lj’s dad and the condoms. yes
chris was funny but not how i imagined her?? idk it was off putting but that’s just a personal thing
i wish “you look pretty in blue” was in the movie bc that was such a pure , throwaway thing that peter did in the book and idk i just wish it was the note that lara jean used when she saw peter
PETER FUCKING KAVINSKY DRINKING KOMBUCHA INSTEAD OF BEER. WHAT A SOFT BOY
HOT TUB KISS
“for someone who gets such good grades, you can be really dense.”
HE FUCKING PACKED SNACKS FOR THEM AND DROVE ACROSS TOWN TO BUY THE YOGURT THINGS. ACROSS TOWN
my heart was beating so fast during the kiss and afterwards when he HELD ON TO HER AND KISSED HER AGAIN WHEN HE WAS WALKING HER TO HIS ROOM OMFGGGG THAT WAS SO ADORABLE
like i REPLAYED that part because it was so sweet i screamed
JOHN. AMBROSE. FUCKIBG SWOOP BEEECH
all in all i have 473847 instagram vid edits saved for noah centineo that boy is so damn fine
MOREOVER IM SO GLAD THIS MOVIE WAS MADE IM A SLUT FOR ASIAN REPRESENTATION IN FILM AND WITH CRA AND THIS IM HONESTLY HAVING THE BEST TIME. AND AGAIN IM SO GLAD THEY PORTRAYED THE SONG COVEYS AS NORMAL AMERICAN PEOPLE YES FHDJJD
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resbang-bookclub · 6 years
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AMA Transcript: Simple Melody
For our final AMA of Resbang 2017, @alliope, @bbbutterfingers & @daciafu stopped in to answer questions about their Resbang, Simple Melody! Here’s some of what went down:
Q: My first question for Allie is what inspired you to do this AU?
Allie: Well I've generally had the idea for an Over the Garden Wall AU for a while, not necessarily for SE, but as the first check-ins deadline was approaching I ended up rewatching bits of Over the Garden Wall and it just kinda clicked? Mainly I think it came from Crona's betrayal and Beatrice's betrayal and everything fell into place from there. I thought the eerie atmospheres would work well together! So I ended up scrapping my previous idea and wrote 3k plus a summary like three days before the first check-ins, rip.
Q: For butter/dacia, what went into how you decided which scene(s) to art?
butterfingers: HM well there was some chitchat when we started about what kind of work we wanted to do and I said that I loved the Boom comics covers, and then I shouted WHAT IF I MADE  COMIC BOOK COVERS! and I think Dacia went WHAT IF I DID BACKGROUNDS and I guess we just approached it as if we were doing something comic-y haha!
Allie: You two were the power duo.
daciafu: I've always been in love with the style of the backgrounds of OTGW since that's where all those cozy and spooky feelings of fall and the Unknown really shine and I'm honestly HORRIBLE at designing backgrounds so I wanted to take the challenge and push myself to get better! Mimicking other people's styles really helps me break down how they make their choices and teaches me how to make things look Decent so I was super hyped to pick up the OTGW style! And then when Butters and I were trying to figure out What Do and she said she wanted to tackle covers, I decided to do background-heavy scenes. 😊
Q: What is generally your guys’ process (writing for Allie and arting for butters and dacia)?
Allie: Well, I wrote in little scenes, like I would get an idea for a scene and just go for it, the fic wasn't at all coherent until maybe a few days before posting. This actually posed a problem since linking scenes took longer than I thought it would. Because I had most of my scenes written, I thought I had more finished than I really did. By the end of Resbang, I had 56k written but only 20k remotely post-able. I'm a super obsessive planner though, so my whole fic was outlined in detail early on, which was nice cause I knew what I was doing lol
butterfingers: I loved going through Allie's notes, I was always excited to see how they'd connect the dots! My art process is as follows: scribble something, put it aside, look at it a lot throughout the day with the thought that maybe I can surprise myself into seeing something new, find something I hate, fix it, rinse and repeat. For this project I actually... have a friend who works with Boom Comics and she was able to hook me up with a nice little gallery of illustrations for the OTGW comic so I got to go through and put together my mood board for it 😊
daciafu: I read over the gloriousness that was Allie's draft and immediately picked out some neat scenes or wanted to reimagine the classic OTWG ones. I spent a lot of time studying first! Looking at the art books, and poring over the show’s scenes and kind of getting a feel for the color palettes, textures and compositions. Then I watched a tutorial on Youtube where someone just deadass uploaded their painting process on a piece of official art that made it into the show. So that was EXTREMELY helpful to watch the way they painted back-to-front and kind of blended the planes without like, losing depth?? The internet is so, so wonderful. And then I got to work! Started with a soft brush for lineart so it wouldn't be too prevalent, moved onto base colors, then shading, and then really trying to establish textures and make the atmosphere Just Right(tm).
butterfingers: Genius!! Oh damn that sounds like such great advice vis à vis backgrounds. /takes notes
Q: You sound like the dream art partner Allie, I weep for my artists and my last minute HERE IS 10K I JUST TYPED UP BC IM A MESS.
Allie: Ahh geez, these two were the dream partners honestly, like I'm so glad they could gather stuff from my notes, cause I've always got everything together in my head, but then it gets out there and it's a mess, these two deserve all the love.
butterfingers: There was one thing I regret that I didn't have the chance to draw and it was like a throwaway line somewhere in your notes about Maka presenting Soul with a praying mantis and him freaking out. I resonated with that so hard hahaha.
Q: What was the hardest scene for you to write?
Allie: The hardest scene to write that's actually posted was anything with Justin really, I don't get his character and it was tough to write him. There were a few scenes that were hard to write because I rushed them, but I wouldn't say they were genuinely difficult scenes, I just gotta rewrite 'em! But overall the ending scene I'm still struggling to write and there's a dream scene that occurs which has been difficult to write just for making it dream-like enough?
Q: And what was the hardest to art? :o
butterfingers: I had a hard time with Maka's expressions. I had many scribbles designing a Ragnarok lantern, too, but it was very fun!!
Allie: Your design for the Ragnarok lantern was so good, I still cry over it.
butterfingers: Ahaha thank you! He was very Calcifer inspired ;)
daciafu: I struggled quite a bit with the first one I painted, just because it was all so new to me. I had to base color 3 different times because the soft lineart bothered me if something extended too far, or there was white background peeking through. And then reimagining the texture in the leaves and the ground to try to separate the planes there but also wanting them to be cohesive was a bit of a headache. If I had to go back and do that one over again I think I'd be more prepared to deal with the foliage lmao.
butterfingers: Your textures were very excellent, that was a quality I struggled with as well!
daciafu: The first one I painted was the Golden Light scene where Maka and Soul are leaving the woods and entering the fields.
butterfingers: Trees r hard.
Allie: They all came out so incredible though, I'm in awe of how you were able to create those leaves.
daciafu: Omg ;;;;; At the same time trees are so organic and flowy and the chances of getting them wrong are pretty slim considering they can get janked as hell lol they're super fun to just zone out to. "I’ll just put a happy little leaf here, ooh and how’s about another one right next to it. They can be happy friends. Oh look, the squad showed up!!" Channeling my inner Bob Ross... but yeah you can just do whatever with them and they somehow come together.
Q: Daciafu how do u.....background, like you did so well and all I hear from art friends is various levels of pterodactyl screeching when the word background is mentioned.
daciafu: I heavily based the Leafing the Forest scene and the church scene after stills from the show so I don't get composition points there, but I built the pumpkin fields just based off of the environment’s design elements. I really wanted to push the depth of that scene but also give it that same never-ending quality to it, and I'm super happy with the results. Another note is that I omitted the characters entirely while building the backgrounds. Since I'm usually a pretty character-heavy artist, I wanted to tackle it like I was preparing the scene for an animator later. And then once they were done, I added in our sweet kids. Doing it that way first really helped to cement the characters in the space rather than my usual "character is done, how can I put them in an interesting physical space?" struggle lmao.
Q: Did you guys feel like your writing/arting changed at all or that you learned anything/picked up new skills/honed old ones etc. etc. during Resbang?
Allie: Gosh yeah, it changed a lot. In hindsight a bad idea, but this was the first fic I'd ever written with intention of posting and the longest piece I'd ever written. Before this I had written very little and my longest piece was maybe 10k. Throughout Resbang I've learned most of everything from the ground up, it's taught me a lot about my limits, how I work and writing in general. I've definitely improved a lot from the experience!
butterfingers: Let me tell you all about the airbrush tool that I discovered during Resbang. Amazing. Incredible.
daciafu: I learned how to paint backgrounds!!! Which is something I've always wanted to get better at. And I got super comfortable in Clip Studio (I'd just gotten it) as well as using texture brushes, so overall it was a very helpful and wonderful experience as a Resbang participant and as an arteest.
Q: Oh that reminds me butters, what program do you use?
butterfingers: Paint Tool SAI for the most part, and then Photoshop for color correction, borders, and, like, finesse things! :)
Q: Did you guys listen to any music that inspired you or helped you create?
Allie: Ah, yeah! I had a playlist actually! https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLjTCaFkFU6rkD1edJwCZmHvJiUwlSUeGZ
If you want I can explain some bits of it? I use music a lot when writing aha. I like to associate certain songs with characters and character relationships, so most of the songs are connected to a particular part of the story. The Monroe Transfer, Wayfaring Stranger, and Mountains were all more general atmosphere stuff. Blame was very much related to Maka, which may not be apparent now, but yeah. Ragnarok I actually connected a lot with Willow Tree March. Soul was probably closest with A Lady. Crona had a lot of songs, but Neptune was most specific to them, as was probably Ghost Towns. Some character relationships I associated with certain songs, Crona-Ragnarok and Soul-Maka were both pretty connected to Always Gold, especially that dang last line "there were holes in you, the kind that I could not mend" oh man. Crona-Maka was definitely We Could Be Friends, Bloom, and Spell. Meet Me in The Woods I thought was a pretty good group song! Those are just some general bits of my thinking with the music aha.
daciafu: Definitely checked out Allie's dope playlist. For most of my working time, tho, I was either listening to TAZ: Commitment or MBMBaM oddly enough lol. I will forever think of Justin's uproarious laughter whenever I look at them lmao.
Q: Were any of the relationships difficult to characterize?
Allie: Mmm this may sound weird but early Maka-Crona was weird for me, cause they were kinda at that point where they want to (or at least Maka wants to) like each other, but they don’t like or trust each other at all and it's a weird spot for them. I'm used to writing them as at least interested by one another, if not enemies or already fond of one another, so this felt like a very odd place to start with them.
Q: Do you guys have future plans for writing/drawing? Aside from polishing and posting the rest of the fic!
Allie: I have,,, too many plans,, I need less plans,, someone please take them away from me, I can't be trusted with them,,,, I do want to do a sequel for this when I get it finished, playing on the detail about crows memory lasting five years so. Beyond that I have a SoMa fic to finish for the prompt challenge!! I'm working on a gift for Crescentcrona, which is a fantasy Kirona fic called Eat The Rich. I have polyam week fics that I'm cleaning up, I think my favorite so far is a Azusa/Naigus/Sid/Mifune one for Through The Seasons. And God I have so many CroMa fics I want to write, I gotta fill the AO3 tag. I think the biggest one right now is a wings-related soulmates au that I've been working on on the side since October I think?
daciafu: Yo there's one scene that I'm like sUPER hyped to do if Allie does the sequel because I already know exactly how I wanna draw it but I wasn't able to fit that in near the end, and it didn't end up in the first part. But there are a couple of other scenes Allie and I workshopped that would be super fun to do and I would love to draw them. Other than that, my drawing plans are pretty much working on commissions as they come in. Surprisingly my queue has been maxed out and I just got a full time job so of course now I'm like.... hm.... I'll get 'em done eventually!!
----
That’s the end of the AMAs for the 2017 season! Thanks again for reading along with us, and see you next year! :)
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potterblogs-blog · 7 years
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ok y'all have been sorting pjo characters into hogwarts houses which would be nice if you were doing it right
it’s great that you’re trying and all but the thing is, I find a lot of them following the same pattern:
All the demigods are automatically in Gryffindor, because they’re super brave. Octavian and Ethan Nakamura and Clarisse and all sorts of people the fandom doesn’t like are obviously in Slytherin because, you know, Slytherin is hella evil. Then we’ve got the stuck-ups in Ravenclaw and the background characters in Hufflepuff, ‘cause apparently it’s the potato House.
Since all this is hella stereotypical and not at all correct, I was like, well, what would I do? Well hERE IS THE ANSWER ASSHATS
*bill nye voice* please...cOnSiDeR tHe FoLLoWiNg
Percy is a hella Hufflepuff, no denying it, not one bit. He doesn’t care about a position or nothing, he is just a pure Hufflepuff inside and out.
Let’s talk about some major Hufflepuff qualities here:
• Dedication (yo my boy percy is pretty dedicated to the camp and to staying alive am i right i mean he was literally not at all tempted to join kronos’ army like ever soo yeah. also. consider a thing. have u even read the books. if they are a smol bean and he has met them at least 15 mins ago u bet ur lil ass he’s dedicated)
• Patience (percy has not decapitated a SINGLE god on purpose and they all keep coming back, i mean it’s bound to happen someday but CMON YOU GOTTA ADMIRE HIM FOR THAT. literally so patient. even by ADHD standards and its ok u can ask me i have ADHD but that’s beside the point back to percy now)
• Loyalty (it’s his freaking fatal flaw wtf else do you want from him??? to jump into tartarus out of loyalty to his girlfriend??? you do one wrong thing to percy’s friend and he will mESS UP YOUR SHIT LIKE A TRUE HUFFLEPUFF DON’T EVEN PRETEND HE WON’T. remember nancy? I THOUGHT SO. FIRST FEW PAGES OF THE SERIES. AND IT ONLY GETS BETTER)
THAT BEING SAID: ALL THESE THINGS ARE DEF PRETTY IMPORTANT TO PERCY OKAY
Conclusion: HELGA HUFFLEPUFF IS HAPPY THAT SHE HAS SUCH A HELLA HUFFLEPUFF IN HER HOUSE WHERE HE BELONGS.
Don’t try to tell me my girl Annabeth is a Ravenclaw because she ain’t no Ravenclaw get outta my face and let me lay down some FACTS here
LOOK AT THESE SLYTHERIN/ANNABAE TRAITS
• Cunning (we all know what this means so lemme just throw down some hella rad SYNONYMS because those are just the bOMB DIGGITY: we got crafting, scheming, designing, and calculating rn. YOU KNOW WHO IS ALL OF THOSE THINGS? MY GIRL ANNIE. FIGHT ME. I GOT ANNABETH ON MY TEAM AND SHE WILL SLAY YOU WITH HER CLEVERNESS AND DECEIT BEFORE SHE EVEN TAKES OUT HER DAGGER. SHE TRICKED ARACHNE INTO WEAVING HER OWN DEATH TRAP FOR ZEUS’ SAKE)
• Resourcefulness (lil bby annabeth ran away from home in SAN FRANCISCO when she was SEVEN and met luke and thalia in RICHMOND which is in VIRGINIA. SHE WAS SEVEN AND SOMEHOW WENT FROM THE WEST COAST TO THE EAST COAST. GOTTA BE RESOURCEFUL FOR THAT. also remember that time when she broke her ankle, scolded it, then made a cast out of bUBBLE WRAP? BECAUSE I DO. AND THEN THE WHOLE WEAVING A BRIDGE THING. DANG GIRL.)
• Ambition (don’t deny it this girl’s fatal flaw is pride and those two things are connected aS SHIT. SHE’S SO INTENT ON BEING AN ARCHITECT THAT SHE GOT THE GODS TO GIVE HER A JOB REDESIGNING MOUNT OLYMPUS AND THATS A BIG ASS THING IF I DO SAY SO MYSELF. reminder that this girl had the chance to get away from a sphinx but she challenged it instead because it was sorta insulting?? who else do we know is like this?? oh yeah fUCKIGN SLYTHERINS)
ANNABETH BAMF CHASE HAS ALL THESE QUALITIES AND SHE KNOWS IT. THAT’S WHY SHE USES THEM TO HER ADVANTAGE SO OFTEN.
Conclusion: SALAZAR SLYTHERIN SAYS ANNABETH CHASE CAN SLAY HIS BASILISK ANYTIME THAT’S HOW PERFECT SHE IS FOR THIS HOUSE.
LEMME TALK TO YOU ABOUT A THING HERE. A BIG THING. AN IMPORTANT THING. JASON IS A RAD LIL RAVENCLAW BOOGER AND HERE’S WHY. THERE ARE A WHOLE LOTTA RAVENCLAW TRAITS BUT IMMA GIVE YOU 3.
• Wisdom (yeah annabeth’s mom may be the goddess of wisdom but if jason wasn’t wise then how the heckity heck would he have survived long enough to be made a freaking PRAETOR. also you know what fight me. jason is the equivalent of a giant dog that is a floofer and goes boof and loves small children but that has nothing to do with wisdom anyway he is one of the smartest out of the seven)
• Individuality (yeah that’s a thing go ask my girl JK. if jason isn’t so Original™ then explain to me please how he restored the Fifth Cohort to awesomeness?? he was a total badass who didn’t take any shit and turned it around for the whole cohort that’s how. this lil boi is an individual yis. one might ask how can one be a badass but also be a fluffball? well jason did it so stop asking ok)
• Acceptance (we are talking about the official mom friend and the founder of the nico di angelo protection squad what else do you want him to do, hug mother earth??? he wrote the song you’ve got a friend in me because he loves everyone)
SEE HERE: JASON IS A TOTAL DORK NERD WHO POKES PIPER AND GOES “PIPER. PIPER LISTEN TO THIS THING I FOUND OUT TODAY. PIPER ISN’T IT AWESOME”
Conclusion: NOWHERE ELSE IS WHERE JASON GOES. HE WEARS THE RAVENCLAW DIADEM TO ALL OF HIS CLASSES. FIGHT ME. ALSO THE GREY LADY BC HE MAKES HER COOKIES AND SHE LOVES IT EVEN THOUGH SHE’S DEAD AND CAN’T EAT THEM.
Consider yourself a thing. Consider all of the Gryffindor Piper things. JUST CONSIDER THEM.
• Recklessness (subtle reminder that Piper used her charmspeak to fuckign steal stuff even though she knew she would get caught. also consider yourself some other things. remember when she anNIHILATED A FRICKIN GODDESS WITH HER IMPULSIVENESS BECAUSE YES. remember when she and anniebell had to do the thing with the stuff that was all about feelings and shit but lil orphan annie over there was totally lost and all like “this is hella illogical” and pipes was just all “we just gotta dO THE THING ANNABETH” and it was total badassery bc it’s the reason i live)
• Bravery (this girl went on her first quest like a week after she found out she was a demigod and would probably die a painful death bUT DID SHE STUTTER?? nah. REMEMBER WHEN SHE SCREAMED AT A CROWD OF ANGRY ROMAN CHILDREN WHO WANTED MURDER BECAUSE JASON GOT HIT IN THE HEAD WITH A BRICK AND SHE HAD TO PROTECT HIM??? BRAVE. went on her first quest knowing that her dad was probably gonna die and did all the things to make the giants angry and plan a rescue??? BRAVE AF.)
• Chivalry (HELLA amazing friend because she’s just sO GENUINE AND KIND and you know that if someone hurts you she will CUT THEM WITH HER SUPER BADASS KNIFE THAT GIVES PEOPLE NIGHTMARES. stands by jason ALL THE TIME especially when he needs her and actually everyone can count on her for all of the things.)
SO: IF YOU DON’T THINK PIPER IS HELLA BRAVE THEN YOU ARE VERY WRONG MY DEAR FRIEND.
Conclusion: Piper would have defeated Voldemort by year 2 but sadly she was not the chosen one. GODRIC GRYFFINDOR SAYS HER FACE SHOULD BE PERMANENTLY ENGRAVED ON HIS SWORD SO THAT THE LAST THING THEIR ENEMIES SEE IS THE CUTE AND UNFORGIVING FACE OF PIPER MCLEAN.
On the subject of Leo: This child is a Ravenclaw through and through no evidence needed but jUST IN CASE I WILL TALK TO YOU ABOUT THE STUFF.
• Creativity (we are talking about a smol bean who makes tiny helicopters and stuff that actually works WHEN HE IS NOT EVEN LOOKING AT WHAT HE IS DOING OR PAYING ANY ATTENTION TO IT. remember how this child saw a terrifying bronze dragon that everyone had tried and failed to tame and just went “sweet, imma grab that so we can ride off into the Canadian sunset”??? yeahp. remember when apollo needed a thing so he just casually freaking iNVENTED A BRAND NEW INSTRUMENT LIKE IT WAS NBD??? I DO. BADASS)
• Originality (leo practically becomes famous for his abilities to come up with plans that are so ridiculously original that nobody figures out what’s happening before it’s too late and if that’s not good enough for you then idk what is. allow me to raise you the cyclops incident, right next to the robot eidolons thing plus that whole fiasco where he fuckign died, also did i mention the valdezinator or the fact that he was the only person to ever figure out how to return to ogygia?? this kid is a mechanical engineer already and he’s 16 im pretty sure baby eight year old leo sat through calculus classes at a local college and got the best grades tbh)
• Wit (leo is the master of comebacks and rash two-minute ideas that actually end up working like damn son this is a purebred Ravenclaw right here lemme just appreciate this. also hey remember that time where he got launched off of a flying ship and was hurtling downwards at a very alarming rate because you know that’s what happens when you fall and he literally actually built himself a working helicopter so that he wouldn’t die all while free falling from probably at least a few thousand feet in the air like damn son)
AS A FOOTNOTE: LEO CAN RIVAL ANNABETH IN KNOWLEDGE I MEAN HE IS A MECHANICAL ENGINEER WHAT MORE DO YOU ASK FOR
Conclusion: Leo and Jason share the diadem. Leo gets it on mondays, wednesdays and fridays and Jason gets to wear it on tuesdays, thursdays and saturdays and on sundays they surrender it to the marble bust of Rowena Ravenclaw in the Ravenclaw Tower who says that LEO DESERVES TO BE IN RAVENCLAW EVEN MORE SO THAN YOUR AVERAGE STUDENT COME AT ME BRO
ok well hazel is somehow both my child and my mom so I’m not exactly sure how that works but anyway hERE ARE ALL THE REASONS THAT HAZEL IS A BEAUTIFUL, BADASS SLYTHERIN.
• Cunning (hey y'all remember that time with the cliff and the turtle and the feet?? terrifying huh?? yeah girl slay!! hazel will trick you and manipulate you and you won’t have any idea it’s happening until you’re being gobbled up by your own gargantuan pet sea turtle. Slytherins are also known for achieving their ends in any and all ways and all i could think of was how my child actually literally fuckign died so that she could stop the rise of acelonywhatever and the whole time she was 13 and staring death and gaea right in the frickin face and she didn’t give any shits at all)
• Resourcefulness (let’s talk about that time when hazel was “captured” by the amazons and basically had nothing so she did the only logical thing which was drown them in massive piles of jewelry from the warehouse and make them beg for mercy, also there was this horse thing that nobody could touch and she just casually goes “oh just a sec lemme summon a giant gold nugget that was probably at least a mile into the dirt because how else would it be this big” and he loves her and she rides him into victory. did i mention that hazel is my mom?? this is just one (1) of the sUPER RAD RESOURCEFUL THINGS that hazel manages to pull off)
• Ambition (hazel both believes and knows for a fact that she can literally do all of the things and she never once doubts herself like at all because she is AMAZEBALLS LIKE THAT. SHE WAS 13 AND THE AMAZONS WERE ALL LIKE “DANG GIRL WE WANT YOU ON OUR TEAM” and she was like “i got this huge to-do list but nbd i’ll get her done” like she is pURE CONFIDENCE AND. YES)
Also: SHE’S TOTALLY SUPER COOL WITH ALL THE THINGS AND IS NEVER FAZED. THAT IS MY GIRL.
Conclusion: HAZEL LEVESQUE IS SLYTHERIN AF AND WILL ALWAYS ACHIEVE HER ENDS NO MATTER HOW MANY GIANT SEA TURTLES SHE HAS TO FEED YOU TO. SALAZAR SLYTHERIN FRICKIN APPROVES AND THINKS THAT SHE IS JUST AS TERRIFYING AS ANNABETH.
Not gonna deny that my lil noob Frankie's a tRUE PURE-HEARTED GRYFFINDOR. THIS IS WHY YOU SHOULD AGREE WITH ME.
• Chivalry (WE’RE TALKING ABOUT A CHILD WHO WILL TRIP OVER HIS OWN FEET AND PUNCH HIMSELF IN THE FACE IF IT MEANS HE’S SHOWING RESPECT TO YOU. my dude doesn’t care who you are, he will literally always show you respect until he’s given a reason not to. everything he eVER DOES is because he’s PROTECTING SOMEONE or he’s GETTING A LIL BIT OF PAYBACK and if that’s noT A GRYFFINDOR THING THEN DAMN SON YOU SHOULD REALLY SORT OUT YOUR PRIORITIES)
• Bravery (if you’re going to come into mY HOUSE and tell me that FRANK ZHANG ISN’T BRAVE then feel free to hit yourself in the face with a hammer because guess what losers?? this kid loses his mom and then his gma just goes “oh by the way you’re half god and you have a gift that you need to figure out for yourself and also here’s this piece of wood, don’t burn it or else you will actually die, now go with this pack of fuckign wolves to camp so that monsters won’t attack you and you won’t die, plus when you get there you have to beg forgiveness for this thing that your great grandfather did or else they might literally murder you. have fun” and frankie just rOLLS WITH IT AND KICKS ASS WHILE BEING A CUTE LIL CHUBBY BUNNY. LET’S NOT FORGET ABOUT HOW HE COMPLETELY OBLITERATED A WHOLE CITY’S WORTH OF MONSTERS to appease a stupid ass god and save nico and hazel from being forever plants and he gets back and trippy is absolutely terrified of him because omg he’s glowing red and he actually did the thing and oh also he kind of scared me so much that i sort of forgot i was a god and had power over him)
• Nerve (let me repeat how FRANK ENOUGH NERVE TO THREATEN A GOD WITHOUT EVEN THINKING OF THE CONSEQUENCES. I’M SO DONE WITH THIS. THIS IS MY SHIT THANKS. PLS APPRECIATE FRANKIE YOURE ALL BREAKING MY HEART. Also remember how he entrusted his real actual lifeline to somebody who wasn’t him like daaang boi that is so pure)
Additionally: FRANK ZHANG IS THE REASON I AM ALIVE AND WELL. ALSO REMEMBER HOW HE BECAME PRAETOR?? I DO BELIEVE THAT IS THE MOST BADASS WAY ANYONE HAS EVER BECOME PRAETOR PLEASE AND THANKS
Conclusion: GODRIC GRYFFINDOR CRIED WHEN FRANK WAS SORTED INTO HIS HOUSE. GODRIC DOESN’T THINK HE EVEN DESERVES FRANK. FRANK CAN HAVE 4 OF HIS SWORDS.
THIS HAS BEEN A THING. A THING WITH HOUSES AND PJO. I HOPE THIS WAS ENTERTAINING AT LEAST. THANK YOU KINDLY.
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janiedean · 7 years
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(part 1) ur gonna roast me for this but im legit curious why mafia AUs are so bad? im asking in a non confrontational way, i get it romanticizing mafia is wrong, but i also believe that 1)most mafia AUs are a really toned down type of mafia;2)they do make for some interesting kinds of dynamics with fanart and with fics; 3)in a fic specifically u can create your own world and call something mafia and still make it so they don't kill innocent people but only idk members of other gangs or sth
(part 2) plus theyre a way to put ur charas in a completely diff context and see what theyll do. i mean i dont believe that writing ships in a certain context (like mafia) equals romanticizing that context. mafia AUs arent even my fav things to read (in fact i almost never do), im sure many ppl romanticize it and i obvs dont agree with that but im just trying to udnerstand bc i believe fandoms are a way to explore things that we normally wouldnt.
I’m not gonna roast you don’t worry xD okay wait let me check if I replied to this already if yes I’m gonna c/p because it’s half past midnight otherwise I’ll just go at it again wait *checks tags* fff obviously I don’t have a general post but anyway pls read this after you’ve done with my post and then this which is also choke-full of links. plus for a (not nice) laugh: here. AH WAIT I FOUND THE POST.
okay, so, let’s have it out of the way: I have nothing against mob aus or crime aus. I have a problem against calling them mafia AUs because in the US mafia = organized crime at large, in Italy mafia = ACTUAL EXISTING ORGANIZATIONS THAT ARE ACTIVELY HARMFUL. now that I introduced the topic I’ll c/p you the reply I gave to another anon who while discussing the issue pointed out that most writers don’t even know Italian mafia is a thing, which is pretty much on the same discourse so...
*The thing is - in the US it might not be enough of a deal anymore and I honestly do get why people make the mafia = regular mobsters, since the mafia was the first foreign organized crime being exported to the US via italian immigrants (sorry if this sounds horrible in English but I just woke up and I still didn’t have coffee) so I understand that mafia became the umbrella term.But the thing is that - as you said, these people don’t even know that there’s a mafia in Italy anymore or where the word comes from.
 I’m going to link to italiansreclaimingitaly’s tag about the mafia and its perception outside Italy because they posted about this extensively and it’s an excellent resource, but meanwhile I’m gonna do a very short bullet point list and about the topic:
Mafia might not be a big deal in the US, but it still is here. We have the beauty of four different mafias (Cosa Nostra - the Sicilian one, camorra which is the one in Campania but has tendrils spread everywhere, the 'ndrangheta which is in Calabria and the Sacra Corona Unita in Puglia) which are all active [especially camorra and 'ndrangheta] and whose actions have direct impact (negative) on our economy and on our society. Actually mafias are one of the main reasons we’re currently economically fucked up, and if I start talking about how mafia culture keeps some areas literally backwards I could talk about it for three months.
There are still people who are killed for standing up against them. These days the most prominent personality is Roberto Saviano who is a writer who dared to put together a book documenting minutely the way camorra works and he’s been living under protection for years by this point. Like, they want him dead because he wrote a book. And I’m sorta sure that he was talking about leaving Italy and going to the US after years of sticking with it here because he can’t take it anymore but I don’t know if it was a taken decision or if it’s still debating it.
It wasn’t even thirty years ago that we had the stragi di mafia - in english it’d be something like the mafia slaughters, basically around the beginning of the nineties there were a number of bombs planted by the mafia targeting people who were trying to oppose it including judges Falcone and Borsellino, actually the anniversary of Falcone’s death is like... tomorrow. And they’ve killed people for way longer than that. Here is a list of only Cosa Nostra victims including the ones from the eighties/nineties. And people are still dying because of it. The slaughters I’m referring to are just the ones in the nineties which are enough of a number.
They also perpetuate a culture where if you testify against your mafia-employed relatives you’ll be shunned forever. There are women who testified against their families and couldn’t see their children anymore never mind that they weren’t automatically considered a relative anymore the moment they sided against the mafia. Some people have committed suicide after becoming witnesses also because our police force/justice system can be terribly non-supportive in this kind of situation so they got left on their own. Never mind that back in the day - it was the beginning of the nineties? - I recall at least a particular story of - I think, correct me if I remember wrong but I can’t remember the names for the life of me - where this guy testified against the local mafia when he either used to work for them or was forced to pay them the pizzo and in retaliation his six-year old (or five? Anyway he had a son younger than ten for sure) got kidnapped, killed and thrown into acid to dispose of the body. That happened in what, 1993? 1994? It’s pretty much yesterday. And now the camorra is doing the same - there’s a list here of camorra victims among which accidental passerbys that got killed because they were in the way which I can tell just by glancing is not complete. And I’m not even going into the 'ndrangheta. That is to say, here mafia still kills people and cripples our country.
Now, I get that it’s a word, but the point was: let’s say that instead of the Italians the Japanese came to the US first and the umbrella word for organized crime was yakuza rather than mafia and let’s say yakuza was still what it was originally in Japan while in the US it stopped being a big deal and people write yakuza!AU instead of mafia AU. Let’s say someone Japanese gets angry at that and goes like 'listen the yakuza is a real deal it does this this this and that and it’s a plague in our country so can you please at least look it up before writing your fanfic’, which is what had happened way back then when this whole mafia and fanfic thing blew up. A bunch of people told us to get over it because it’s just a word and if it’s a problem in Italy it’s not in the US so why should they care? Now, if we had been Japanese (or Chinese or Russian or Mexican) would they have said the same thing? Considering the general tumblr attitude I’m pretty sure they would have received either an apology or 'this is an important deal let’s keep that in mind’ with signal boost reblogs and stuff. 
It’s the fact that we should get over people not knowing that it’s still a real problem for us and that they can’t take five seconds to google it that is the problem imo. Especially when instead of mafia au you can just say mobsters au or tag it as organized crime and everyone is a lot happier, mostly because as the tag above explains romanticising the mafia is a good thing for them because it means they can act outside Italy with less stigma because everyone thinks that the mafia is dead or not relevant anymore, if I’m explaining myself. (And it’s active outside Italy - like, there was a mafia kill in Germany in 2007 where six people died (sorry the link is in Italian but there isn’t an English wiki page, if you look the city up you’ll find something probably) and it was because of the 'ndrangheta.
I’d really like to not get worked over it because it meant it was a thing of the past y'know, but the problem is that it isn’t and I’d rather spread some awareness in hope some of these writers look it up (because it’s a good thing that people know what mafia is since as stated they have tendrils everywhere - if you read Saviano’s book the entire first chapter is about how camorra regularly deals with Chinese import/export in Italy for one) than shrug and figure that since they’ll think everything is good for fanfic then it’s not even worth my time.*
Now, ^^^ that was the c/p-ed reply that should answer most of your doubts. What I didn’t address was:
im sure many ppl romanticize it and i obvs dont agree with that but im just trying to udnerstand bc i believe fandoms are a way to explore things that we normally wouldnt.
aaaand as we say here in Italy, this is where the donkey falls (sorry we have weird sayings), because in theory there’s nothing wrong with that... except that in 99% of the mafia aus I’ve seen around the thing is that they’re supposed to be cute.
like, I see a lot of shit with TINY MAFIA BOSS STEVE ROGERS with RUSSIAN ENFORCER BUCKY (????? bucky isn’t even russian???) and the yoi thing I saw before had the japanese character being the leader of a russian mafia gang which is... like... guys it doesn’t happen it really doesn’t, and a lot of them re-use wrongly terminology taken from the godfather without context or knowing what the hell it means, and it’s always from the criminals’ pov and they’re somehow seen as criminals doing justice where the police can’t (???) and like... no. mafia bosses/enforcers/employees are bad people period, and at least here if you try to leave or repent they kill your family in retribution. like, not even ten years ago there’s been a woman who used to belong to a mafia family (or one colluded with the mafia) who testified and her entire town/family shunned her and she couldn’t take it anymore and... killed herself drinking acid if I don’t recall wrong. it’s not even special cases. this shit is not funny, it’s not cute, it’s not adorable and it’s not good fodder for your imagine your otp scenario (srsly I saw one like.. let me find it,
LIKE. just look at this shit. in a regular context, the enforcer goes to the show owner to force them to pay a monthly sum to their boss lest they destroy their shop and their lives and their family’s life never mind that mafia culture is deeply homophobic so the mafia enforcer flirting with the shopkeeper is like completely fucking out of the question. I mean, people here like to shit on the sopranos but that show was actually excellent representation of Horrid Criminals Who Were Never Supposed To Be Good People and the small arc that happened when one of tony’s friends turned out to be gay (closeted) was REALLY well done. btw, it ended that when they found out he was gay most of the crowd rejected him and thought badly of him until I think they killed him also for other reasons, but that spiraled from finding out he liked dick. and that’s american mafia that they actually based on well-done research of the culture in Italy it came from, I assure you that here it doesn’t work that differently. like. the shit above is so inaccurate and frankly offensive, it’s like... I get people romanticizing problematic stuff but the thing is that when you tell them that it’s actually offensive you get brushed off as ‘ah well you’re being too sensitive it’s just a word u__u’. now, I’m all for exploring shit we wouldn’t be into, but not like THAT, because that’s like mafia romantic comedy and that’s not how it works. now, you wanna do a fic where the mafia characters are deeply flawed and bad people and the police tries to catch them? fine, great, go ahead. you wanna do a fic where the enforcer above deals with dunno an entire life of internalized homophobia when he finds the shopkeeper attractive and feels conflicted over having to con money out of him and doing horrible shit for a living and maybe understanding that crime isn’t worth it and then he actually collaborates with the police and gets shit from about everyone he knows and loves for that? okay, awesome, go ahead. nothing bad in that.
but the shit above is not exploring things we wouldn’t/writing darkfic, it’s THINKING THAT A CRIMINAL ORGANIZATION WHICH IS STILL A THING IN OUR PART OF THE WORLD IS CUTE AND ADORABLE. and that only plays in their favor because it takes the bad aura out of the word and we really should not let that happen. like. that is what is bad about mafia aus and mafia discourse, that people don’t realize the mafia is alive and well and thriving and not a thing that doesn’t exist or a generic word for organized crime.
you wanna write the shit above? okay, CALL IT CRIME AU or mob au, not mafia au.
btw, add-on: idk if I mentioned it in the above post or not, but in case I didn’t, I said that people would balk at the idea of a mexican cartel au. sadly since then I’ve found out a fandom where not only there is one but it’s also extra cutesy and people apparently love it and it has a bunch of kudos/comments and idek I’m not even touching that with a ten foot pole but like... I’ve avoided it and everything that author wrote because to me it’s just... nope. like, nope. if you do mafia aus don’t make them fucking cute. (also: in the same fandom I had to mute a v. famous fanartist whose art I actually liked but did cutesy mafia aus and.. like... haahahhaahahahahaha nah sorry. can’t go there. nope.)
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mousepatrol · 7 years
Text
8.8.17
so the reason im not posting this on the correct day is because our power is out right now. I completely forgot, but our powers supposed to be out from 8pm to 3pm which is completely stupid because the sun goes down right at 8 so that’s when I would need to start using it. I mean, they could have done it at around midnight when all reasonable people are asleep, or at least ten, when people are usually done eating and theyre just hanging out. You know? Also Im using word for this so that’s why things are being autocorrected
so, my day. Trash galore, folks.
I turned off my alarm last night because I didn’t think it was doing me any good and I was getting worried that I was just making myself sleep deprived for when school starts, so I went to bed around 3 or maybe even 4 (cant even fucking remember why at this point, I didn’t have shit to do) and then I woke up at 1145. Could have been worse but also could have been a lot better. So I wasn’t that tired bc I hadn’t been woken up 120000 times and I managed to actually be awake for a while. I fucked around on the computer for an hour and then made some pasta because apparently I cant eat anything else anymore. My appetite is shit
I ate like… only half of my food before I had to get ready to leave bc my mom was having a showing of the house and that means I have to leave. So I decided I was just going to go to the gym oh but I forgot something happened while I was going downstairs to cook
I made a short textpost about this already but I ran into my mom (who was in my brothers bathroom and I therefore thought she wasn’t home) and she told me that my dad had cancelled the flight he had for when I go back to school. So basically he was going to come out with me and help me move in even though I told him I wouldn’t really need that much help this time, since I already have all of my stuff and my new place is furnished. But when I had just gotten home, he insisted, and so he booked a flight with me. Also my parents told me that my car should be low on gas when I put it in storage so it was and it turns out that’s completely wrong so he was going to help me with my car also. It needs to go to the shop too just for like oil and stuff
Um so yeah apparently hes the biggest baby ever and my mom still wanted me to apologize to him and I think I did a good job of telling her that no, I should not apologize for my tiny bad thing (telling my dad several times to be quiet in increasingly sarcastic ways, bc I was watching jeopardy and he would not stop talking and I cant hear it when hes talking bc bad ears) when he wont even apologize for calling me a piece of shit and running away upstairs and banging things around and making me scared. That’s not acceptable and even though I recognize that I could have handled it better, I think that my response of annoyance (after days upon days of him doing this same thing while I try to tell him to not) was reasonable and honestly the things I said caused no harm. I wasn’t making fun of him. I was ONLY making jokes that had to do with the clues and turning them into ways of telling him to be quiet because I cant hear. I did tell him more nicely to be quiet in the beginning though. I really did. But he just wont stop with this shit and I don’t have infinite patience, even though it’s a lot better than I used to be
Um so yeah. Ok I wrote that for the last paragraph, interesting. But I mean im not mad about him not going, its not like I wanted him there anyway and I knew it would make me very uncomfortable and he would have to get a hotel bc theres nowhere for him to sleep, but its still a bit jarring and frankly just awful that he did that instead of either telling me okay and being quiet or I don’t know, saying im gonna leave the room while you watch it then bc I cant be quiet. Either of those would have been fine but instead of thinking internally about the things he was doing, he projected stuff onto me and just called me a piece of shit. I don’t really know how you can do that as a parent. I cant help but critique him, but at least im not just insulting him. You know? Is that reasonable? Ugh. But anyway, turns out theres a 711 right next to the storage place so if my car is out of gas I can either use the tiny bit that’s left to get it over to 711 or just like get gas from there and bring it to my car. Either way it is possible. I also just need someone to pick me up from the airport but my mom said she would figure that out. So, really, im fine. It’s the circumstance that is just very upsetting, you know. Its just not something that needed to happen and now im mad/scared of him for the rest of the time im here and im just over it as hell
Ok… so I ate lunch and then got ready for the gym bc that’s where I was going. So I went and then I actually went to target first bc I was out of soap, so I got better smelling soap than the one I had last and some more conditioner bc I was also out and I got a pair of comfy shorts that are a little too small for my ass but ill make due because I need more than one pair of shorts. And those other shorts really don’t fit me, I cannot wear them out lol. Then I went to the gym bc it was arm day and that went pretty well and I did it pretty quick so it was tiring for sure. And I came back and had a nice shower and sang against me! Songs really loud because I got tickets to see them in October that Im really psyched about and I just want to listen to them more. Oh man I love laura jane grace she is just so wonderful omg I am so glad to have her in the community its wonderful
So after all of that I went downstairs to get the rest of my pasta that I had put in the fridge, and it was like 6pm and I realized I probably didn’t want to be downstairs tonight so I also got some crackers and cheese and fruits snacks and extra water because I wasn’t sure if I was going to get to eat again (I probably only ate 500 calories today im upset L). So then I went upstairs to eat and I watched the great british bake off which is really nice and I quite like it a lot. Its calming and fun. After that I did a reply because dex replied to two of my threads today so I got one out for him since I want to get that thread going, aaaand about thirty minutes after that the power went off at eight. I had seriously forgotten about that so I don’t know, I kind of just accepted my fate
Im not really sure what exactly happened there, because I felt like I was fine before (was legit browsing dildos online lmfao like I was just bored yknow) but when the power was out I got kind of upset and just… took my plush cow and sat on my bed as the sun went down and just. Stared. Catherine, bless her fucking heart, texted me after like 30 minutes out of the blue so I luckily I had her to talk to for at least a little while. I was feeling shitty before yeah now that I think about it, after my shower I was upset and felt like I was gonna cry but I didn’t and I just sent james some snaps and he said he was gonna text me but he didn’t and that’s ok I think he went to bed because he didn’t open my other snaps. Its ok. He doesn’t need to contact me every minute for me to know that he cares. I love him so much and I sent him a quick text just to tell him that because I always do that when I feel bad just because eventually he replies and it always makes me feel good.
Ok so I cried like two times between eight and nine thirty when I was just sitting there, laying on my bed and texting Catherine about when school starts. I just felt really down because I remember having to turn the lights off around ten and it doesn’t really get a lot darker than it does in the summer at eight (I mean ten during schooltime when I was younger) and I just remember not having any light and no one to talk to or text and I couldn’t read and my parents would lock my computer out at ten so I couldn’t talk to anyone and I just remember being very very lonely and feeling like no one cared about me and not being able to talk to the people that I felt like truly did care about me. So I remember doing a lot of crying in bed in the evenings when I was like 12-16 and its just really sad, you know? i would cry myself to sleep a lot and all I could do was lay there and listen to music because ive always been really bad at sleeping so it would never come at ten even if I really wanted to sleep then. It just didn’t happen. So sitting there in my bed tonight just made me feel like this little kid trapped in this room and I cant go downstairs because im scared of people being bad to me and I cant go out and in my room I have to sit in the dark and its just all very bad. I forgot about all of that. Im an adult now and I can have the lights on when I want but I guess its upsetting for me to not be in control of that
Come to think of it, its also very upsetting when people tell me to go to bed. I talked to this one girl in my rp a lot (she doesn’t talk to me that much now, she talks to another person, I don’t know why and I do feel lonelier now but I guess she wasn’t that nice to talk to anyway so im alright) and if I was up when she woke up (8hhr time difference) she would spam me messages telling me to go to bed and I already knew my schedule but she wouldn’t shut up. I don’t know, that’s just something
Also I hate hearing people say my name. it makes me flinch every time and I think someones going to scream at me. I think that’s half the reason I wanted to change my name when I was going through gender stuff. I just didn’t want to hear that name anymore. Which is sad. Because I do love it, and maybe its not so bad when im not in this house bc its just my parents voices saying my name that really bothers me
So after 930 I went downstairs and got a candle and brought it up and I did a bit of drawing but it got annoying after about half an hour. At some point my dad came to my door and said something that I didn’t understand, so I didn’t say anything and he went away. Then I read catcher in the rye for about an hour (only got through like 35 pages) and now im writing this entry on whats left of my computer battery. Im charging my phone off of this just so it has power, since it was dying, and it looks like I have at least part of an episode of skam saved onto here so I guess im just going to watch that until I fall asleep because I always fall asleep to youtube videos. Im going to have to download some movie or something onto here so that I have that to fall asleep to in case if something like this happens again. Ok I know this was long but theres a lot of good stuff in there so hopefully this will help in therapy or something later. Things are really rough mentally right now and I just want to go home, you know. Ive wanted to go home for absolutely years, though. Idk where home is. bye
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peculiar-headphones · 7 years
Text
all we see is sky
im thirsty for Constant Attention so im posting a couple of my ao3 fics on here bc why the hell not
anyways, here, kleinsen
read on ao3  
Two weeks.
It had been two weeks since Evan Hansen had last spoken to him. Granted, he had yelled at him for using him in the whole Connor ordeal, but he had cooled off the next day. He had expected that Evan would be desperately trying to apologize. But no, it was radio silence. He was tempted to actually approach him, but he was too prideful for that. He figured that Evan wasn’t talking to anyone really.
Jared figured wrong. He walked into the cafeteria to see Alana, Zoe, and him all joking, laughing, talking with each other. When did that happen? Weren’t they both like, extremely pissed at him? Obviously not, as Jared was observing right now. He walked over to his usual table, where all of his, friends(?) sat. As usual, he didn’t engage with them very often. Giving only the occasional nod and fake laugh.
It seemed as if the three were joined at the hip, the only time they weren’t next to each other was when they had different classes or when Alana had some extracurricular thing going on. It was honestly beginning to get on Jared’s nerves. What was he missing? Didn’t they practically have a bonding moment over how pissed they were at Evan? He had the next period with Alana, so he could ask then.
World history seemed to drag on the rest of the period, and every once and awhile he would see Zoe and Evan pass in the hallways running errands or something like that. He would occasionally zone out until the teacher yelled at him for not paying attention. Finally, the bell rang, and Jared hurried as best he could to math.
Of course, no one in their right mind ever looks forward to math class, not even when it’s the second to last class of the day. But Jared was confused, and whenever that happened it felt like an itch he couldn’t scratch until he figured out what the hell was going on. Even better, he sat next to Alana, so he wouldn’t have to risk tossing notes. Alana took her seat next to Jared, and he turned to face her.
“Okay, I gotta ask. When did you and Evan become friends, or, acquaintances or whatever again?” Jared inquired. Alana gave him a confused look.
“We reconciled about a week and a half ago. Are you just now noticing?” Alana answered.
“Yeah, actually. Why though?”
“Well, Zoe and I both agreed that though Evan did lie, a lot of good did come from it. The Conner Project has been doing a lot of work lately and the positive response looks good on a college application. Of course we were upset that he lied, but we all have our faults, and he meant no harm by it. Of course that does not excuse his actions, but he’s working to be a better person. He approached us a few days later stating his regret and we decided to forgive him.”
“Wait,    he       approached you guys?”
“Yes. Why? Has he not spoken to you as of late? I knew we spoke to him about it, but...”
Jared didn’t to the rest of what Alana was saying. He had never payed attention in math before(did anyone ever actually pay attention aside from Alana?), but usually he would just stare off into space. Now his thoughts were swarming. Why hadn’t Evan talked to him? Maybe apologizing to him took more courage than the girls? This meant he would actually have to go seek Evan out and confront him about this. He was literally snapped out of his thoughts when the teacher began snapping his fingers in front of his face. His head shot up and did a quick look around. The class giggled as the teacher went back to his lesson. Jared sighed, he didn’t have the next class with Evan, so he had to wait until after school to talk to him. Hopefully he would be able to trap him at his locker.
Math and Language Arts seemed to take forever, but after what felt like a million years, the final bell rang, and Jared rushed to his locker. He quickly grabbed his bag and shoved his books in, then had to fight the crowd to make his way to Evan’s locker. Thankfully, he had gotten there at the same time as Jared. Evan looked at him like he was a deer in the headlights. Jared didn’t actually think this through, he was unsure of what to say, so he said the first thing that came to his mind.
“So you’ll talk to them but not me?” he regretted it almost instantly, Evan looked like he was on the verge of crying. Jared made an attempt to correct himself.
“I uh, I mean, you’ve been talking to Zoe and Alana a lot lately and not me and Alana said that you had apologized to them so I just figured that you were like, uh, avoiding me, or something.”
Evan’s expression seemed to calm down a bit, but then it hardened.
“I was.”
Evan turned to open his locker, twisting in his combination.
“Wait, wait what?” Jared was even more confused than before.
“W-well, I originally was going to apologize to you after I apologized to the girls, but they pointed out some stuff and then I realized they were right, so I didn’t.” Evan’s voice seemed to quiver.
“Hang on, why would they talk you out of it? This doesn’t make any sense.”
“I mean, I’ve always known that you don’t actually care, so not apologizing to you would just bring your ego down a little, but you wouldn’t have to deal with me anymore. And then Zoe and Alana pointed out all of the times that you stressed that we weren’t actually friends, and how you were only nice to me so your parents would pay your car insurance and-”
Evan rattled on about how shitty of a person Jared was to him, his voice slowly breaking down, and Jared could only stand there dumbfounded. Evan was completely right, he had never once actually been nice to Evan. He had used Evan just like he used him. He grabbed Evan by the shoulders and looked him in the eyes. Evan was tearing up and tried to search for something else to say.
“Evan, your mom’s at work, right? Come with me.” Jared spoke, doing his best to keep his composure, Evan only nodded and grabbed his bag from his locker. Jared grabbed his wrist and guided him to his car.
The car ride was silent, Jared kept on looking over to Evan, who was gazing out the window. He could tell he was crying, but had no clue what to say. He felt an aching tug in his chest.  
Once Evan realized they were at the orchard, he turned to face Jared, his cheeks tearstained. Jared didn’t say anything, just got out of the car and gestured for Evan to follow him. It was a nice day, a tiny breeze blowing through the open field. Jared found a nice area in the middle and sat down. He patted the spot next to him, and Evan hesitantly sat down. Jared was unsure of what to say. As he looked around at the trees surrounding the field, he recalled a conversation he had heard between his parents and Evan’s mom. He glanced over to Evan, who was hugging his knees.
“You….you didn’t fall, did you? When you broke your arm?” he asked cautiously. Evan didn’t acknowledge it, but he had definitely heard him.
“You let go, didn’t you?” he specified, and Evan broke down. He buried his face in his knees and sobbed. Jared would admit, there were about a thousand different ways he could’ve approached that better. He scooted closer to the crying boy and wrapped his arm around him. His hand ran through his hair. He had never knew how    soft       Evan’s hair was.
Evan proceeded to cry for about five minutes. Jared didn’t know what to say, how to comfort him. All he knew is that he wanted to cry too. He rested his head on Evan’s shoulder.
“You know, I’m glad that you survived the fall. I really am.” Jared said, just loudly enough for Evan to hear. Evan sniffed and chuckled through his sobs.
“Sure you are.”
“I am, I really am.” he twisted a lock of hair around in his fingers as Evan continued crying.
Eventually, Evan’s crying had ceased. Both of them were now laying on their back, watching as the clouds rolled by. Excepts for the wind whistling in the trees, everything was quiet. Jared let out a breath he didn’t know he had been holding. He had to say something.
“You remember when I first started calling you a family friend?” Jared asked.
“Yeah, it was like, almost immediately after we met.” Evan answered quietly.
“At the time, I didn’t really understand it, why I wanted to be distant from you, what I was feeling. But I knew that I didn’t want anyone else to figure out my feelings before me. I had some kind of feeling that it would cause me a lot of grief.”
Evan turned his head to look at Jared, who was staring up at the sky.
“Of course, as I grew older, I figured it out. And then I just tried to hide it more. I figured that maybe if I could make myself hate you, I’d get over it. I didn’t. And it spiraled out of control, I can’t imagine how much I hurt you in the process. When you think about it, you probably wouldn’t have been in that shitty situation if I had just been there for you.” Jared chuckled. He could feel his eyes tear up, and he shifted his body closer to Evan’s so that their shoulders touched..
“I’ll admit, it hurt a lot to see you walk away to a better offer, even if I was a shitty person." Jared turned his head so that his eyes met Evan's. "But I am sorry  that I hurt you.” Jared entwined his fingers with Evan’s, giving his hand a small squeeze. To his delight, Evan squeezed back.  
He saw that tears had begun to well up in Evan’s eyes. He leaned his head over and gently kissed the top of his forehead. Evan’s hand began to tremble ever so slightly as Jared pulled away. Silence once again enveloped the area around them. This time, it was Evan who broke it.
“I’m sorry too.” Jared smiled, and gave Evan’s hand another squeeze.
“S-so are we, er, d-dating now?” Evan inquired shyly. Jared suppressed a laugh.
“I would think so. I mean, if you want to.”
Evan nodded, smiling a bit. They turned onto their sides. Evan buried his head underneath Jared’s chin, his hands slightly gripping onto the other’s shirt. Jared wrapped his arms around Evan, and kissed the top of his head, inhaling the scent of his hair. It smelled of pine, or maybe cedar, he couldn’t tell. His new boyfriend truly was a nerd.
They wished they could stay like that for forever, just letting the world pass by, and they could be alright. But eventually the sky grew dark, and they made their way back to the car. Jared called his parents to let them know he would be staying over at Evan’s that night.
And all was well in the world.
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