#my brain seriously is just offline today

[kalihaze604]

offline is the new luxury

Monday, January 15th, 2024

offline is the new luxury.

Seriously. I just deleted all my social media apps yesterday because I was starting to feel like my phone had simply become a time wasting device, and most of my “friends” and “followers” were not actually real friends, just frenemies and lurkers that wanted a livestream of my suffering to laugh at and someone to pity and point at and say “hey at least my life isn’t as bad as theirs?”. I don’t need leeches and lurkers silently hating and judging me. Go live your fucking life in the real world like I am?! It’s not hard to live without social media. It’s not hard to live without doomscrolling becoming a full time unpaid job. It’s so easy to stare mindlessly at a screen for weeks on end while you put your life on hold. It’s so easy to curate a fake image to sell lies to desperate fools. What isn’t easy? Actually being an authentic messy human being living life and trying to heal and recover! We live in a society that tells us that the poor deserve bad health because they can’t afford better and then we place the disabled in a complicated legislated poverty trap as a eugenics program to kill us off faster. Western medicine ain’t shit. It’s a failed experiment sponsored by big pharma’s elites. Same with the education system. Why do I need to pay for a degree when I can Google the answers and do my own research online? And find rare valuable books on the street or at value village for a couple bucks that silently whisper to me and say “I was left here for YOU to find me”. Like that thought about Google came from a rather shitty community member that stated “I don’t need a degree, I have Google!” And despite this person’s otherwise highly problematic views- this one seems to hold value. You don’t need to pay to find answers, if you want answers, either you search for them yourself or they come to you. It’s as simple as that. Anyone asking you to pay? Are you paying for their time and expertise? Their knowledge? Are they really an expert or just another fraud? It’s best to seek answers for yourself instead of paying a fraud. But Instagram is filled with people claiming to be healers practicing “medicine” without a license and getting rich off exploiting peoples suffering while making miracle claims. It’s sick. There are so many narcs online and in the sex work industry. But it makes a lot of sense- like these people are obsessed with their image and trying to pretend to be something they’re not which is easily attained via social media marketing pageantry. I don’t really have much of a fear of missing out anymore on online nonsense. You know what I’m ACTUALLY SCARED OF MISSING OUT ON? living my fucking life authentically without feeling like I need to prove anything or put my life on display! I am scared I’ll miss another day of sunshine before a week of rain because I chose to stay inside staring at a screen instead. Like it’s a sunny day today. I was supposed to be doing laundry right now. But I decided -ya know what, I’m gonna write a blog post about my thoughts and then reschedule laundry and go outside and get some sunlight on my skin (after applying spf of course like a good slut) and get some fresh air. Might go chill (literally) in a park with some lunch but I haven’t really decided yet where today will take me. I feel like I like the long form of blog posts better and I think this will be the only place I’ll be posting online for the foreseeable future. I don’t really care who reads this blog, it’s not really a space where I care about marketing myself to potential clients other than …idk showing my true self and personality and maybe that is scary or maybe that’s exciting and interesting to know that I’m not just a doll, I’m a living, breathing human being with a brain and a heart! Shocking, I know.

Why do I think that offline is the new luxury? It’s about simply not caring about the lurkers, the haters, the critics. Not comparing yourself to others, focusing on simplicity, decreasing stress and anxiety. It’s the whole “I’ll see you when I see you”, being mysterious and moving in silence so that nobody interferes because they don’t even know what you’re doing or where you are and can’t access you or bother you. It’s about independence. It’s about living my life in privacy. It’s about my own inner peace and healing my nervous system at the end of the day and I can’t do that when I’m doomscrolling or feeling so much rage at every single tweet I see talking about how brutally cruel this world has become and how evil people behave towards others. It’s not that I want to look away or stop feeling those emotions, I recognize it’s not good for my mental health to constantly be reading about hatred. There is so much hatred online! But anyways. My time is money. I no longer want to waste it on social media. I want to put my phone down and go live my fucking life. and that’s what I’m gonna do. Byeee

#Goodbye Social Media #blogging #daily blog post #digital detox #no FOMO #authenticity #healing #self awareness #Back to blogging

[ttuesday]

What about hcs of the red dead guys reacting to a dominant vs a submissive s/o?

I’ll be honest anon, this one kinda stumped me. My brain is on strike lol. Warning: these are kinda smutty 

Arthur

-> Arthur doesn't mind being the dominant one. He isn't rough or overly dominant (most of the time) but if you're submissive he'll make sure to take charge the best he can.

-> On a rare occasion when Arthur needs to let off some steam, his true dominant side comes out. He'll sit on the edge of the bed, his belt in his hands and order you to strip for him. And my god, if you give him any attitude when he's like this then you better prepare yourself for the night of your life and very little sleep.

-> Arthur has no problem if you want to dom him. He has no issue with you tying him up but you'd definitely have to let him know that how you appreciate him and that he’s doing good.

-> One of the best views he’s ever seen in his entire life is you riding him. My god, it completely turns him to putty. He’ll do whatever you want when you’re on top of him.

Dutch

-> Dutch likes being in control. He enjoys being the dominant one in the bedroom so if you're more submissive then you'll fit perfectly into his plan. He loves it when you're submissive, following his every word without hesitation.

-> His hands are constantly all over you during an intense make-out session, making sure you don't move a muscle unless he tells you to.

-> Dutch would be shocked if you were dominant. At first he'd see it as a challenge and keep pushing you to see if you'd eventually become submissive. Inside, he's actually impressed and kinda turned on by your dominant side but he still feels the need to challenge you first.

-> After a few days and thinking about being dominated by you, Dutch actually decides to give it a try. Of course, he's going to be a brat throughout the entire thing but at least he's attempting to give up some control. He'll always want to be the dominant one but he's willing to be submissive every once in a while.

Micah

-> Micah will presume you'll be submissive. He has always been dominant, it's who he is. He'll always try to make sure you know he's in charge. 

-> He’s possessive, constantly man-handling you and telling you exactly what he wants you to do. He craves dominance over you. 

-> Micah insists on always being the dominant one. If you want to dom this man then you'll have to wait for the perfect moment. You'll need him to be in a needy mood to go along with it.

-> When he’s needy then all he wants is your love and affection. Micah needs to be told he’s doing a good job and that you love him. This is possibly the only time Micah will let you be the dominant one but he secretly likes it (but he’ll never tell you that).

John

-> John can be a very good dom, especially if you tease him throughout the day. Giving him suggestive glances, strategically bending down to pick up a cup you accidentally dropped, it riles John up.

-> If you’re in town, he’ll bring you down an alley and pin you against a wall, giving you bruising kisses along your neck. As long as you’re willing to be submissive, he’s willing to be dominant.

-> But the second you take control of the kiss and move so he’s the one pushed against the wall, then John has no problem subbing for you.

-> John considers himself to be very lucky to be dommed by you, I mean who doesn’t want that? Sometimes he thinks if he’s submissive then he won’t have to do that much work so make sure to draw it out and don’t leave him have his release until he says ‘please’.

Javier

-> Javier likes being dominant over you. He adores having you tied up and completely at his mercy. Some times he’ll blindfold you too. Afterwards he loves cutting the ropes with is knife.

-> When you first indicate that you want him to be submissive, Javier’s intrigued and goes along with it. Once he sees your dominant side, Javier becomes completely undone. He thinks you’re very sexy when you’re dominant.

-> You know that Brooklyn 99 quote that became a bit of a meme? the “you can punch me, kick me, pull my hair, stab me, bite me, scratch me” one? Anyways, that’s basically Javier. 

Bill

-> Sure, Bill can be dominant but this man is truly a sub. When it comes to sex, Bill can get quite shy and flustered so if you’re also a sub then things can get a tiny bit awkward.

-> His main goal is pleasing you so if you want him to dom you then he’ll try his best. At first he’ll keep stopping and asking you if you’re having a good time and if he’s doing everything properly but after a while Bill will really get into it.

-> If you’re the dominant one then Bill will genuinely believe he’s just died and gone to heaven. Give him orders, tease him, tie him up, tell him you won’t give him kisses afterwards if he isn’t good.

-> Edge him, deny him his release over and over again. As I said, Bill will try to please you when he’s being the dominant one but my god, he’s a sub at heart.

Sean

-> Sean likes to think he’s a dom. When he’s really trying his best, he’ll lower his voice to try and when you ask wtf is he doing with his voice, he’ll say he’s trying to sound “extra sexy”.

-> He loves when you’re submissive but he really has no idea what he’s doing after that. He tried spanking you once but he was scared of hurting you so he just kinda patted your ass ? It was strange and you couldn’t help but burst out laughing.

-> It’s pretty easy to get Sean to be submissive. You just have to show him a little bit of what he wants and then he’ll do whatever you say.

-> Sean’s loud during sex anyways but when you’re the dominant one it’s best if ye are far, far away from camp and in a hotel room. He really can’t help how loud he gets. 

#my brain seriously is just offline today #it is on strike and will not come back #headcanons #writings #arthur morgan #dutch van der linde #micah bell #javier escuella #bill williamson #john marston #sean macguire

[seraphinitegames]

The Wayhaven Chronicles—Update 25/March/2022

Editing week this week, which was...intense! 

I was hoping to push further on the editing but Chapter 8....maaannn, Chapter 8! I love Chapter 8, some BIG moments happen in Chapter 8 for the romances, especially in one particular route, but it's such a mess (for those not aware, the cat decided to add his own sections to the entirety of the chapter, so now I'm having to untangle it all).

SpunkyCat said she was worried I'd have to rewrite it all, and at some points this week, it felt like it might be easier just to do that!

But I am nearly there with untangling all of the Research portions! I should have that finished today or tomorrow, so that will be a massive chunk done.

I'm undecided whether to keep going and just try to get the whole thing done, or take a break from it, get back to writing, and let my brain reform after this week, lol!....Plus I'm seriously eager to get back to writing again!

Though saying all that, reading back through Chapter 8 has been so much fun! :D It's easy to forget some small moments as I write so many variations and things, but I can't wait for people to discover them, hehe! 

Hope you all have an amazing weekend, and that you're having as lovely Spring vibes as we are! (Unless you're in the other hemisphere and then I hope you're having lovely autumnal(?) vibes, hehe!) :D

We'll be offline as usual, so I'll update you all again next Friday! <3    

#the wayhaven chronicles #interactive fiction #progress report #update #Book Three

[starglitterz]

cynosure. (v)

─── chapter 5 ! ~ irl fps ?!

summary; you and xiao are genmates under the famed streamer company genshin impact. the chemistry between the two of you is undeniable, and your fanbases absolutely love your collaborations. but when you both start meeting up offline more and more, your connection starts to deepen past just harmless flirting and playful banter. with these real feelings starting to affect both your job and reputation online, how will you two react when your relationship becomes the internet’s cynosure?

a/n: sorry for the wait T_T this part has actual writing and it is So Long hehe, plus tbh it should be called quill rambling abt how pretty xiao is for 4k words LMAOOO hope you enjoy !! :D

also 哥哥 means big brother in chinese :)

warnings; toy guns mentioned, slightly suggestive, possible ooc xiao but idc this has been in my head Forever /nm

previous.┃masterlist.┃next.

please reblog ! it helps a lot :)

no but seriously if u guys don't reblog this i will use musou no hitotachi on you /j

this chapter is dedicated to my beloved @nurserinnn !!! thank u for always sending me loads of hcs and brainrot after every chapter + super cute & sweet asks SKDJSK ily loads [as a harem member] <3

private messages !

irl !

qiqi crouches on the pavement outside, one hand absently tracing the cracks in the stone ground with the other raised to the sky to block her pale face from the sun's harsh glare. xiao, meanwhile, is leaning against the fence, arms crossed over his torso as he gazes at the small girl to ensure she's alright. "hey qiqi," he begins, tilting his head to gauge her reaction, "do you remember that person i told you about?" "um..." qiqi scrunches up her face as if digging about in her memories to recall, "is it that girl you said was really pretty and fun? qiqi thinks her name is y/n." xiao's face turns redder than a tomato, but he doesn't deny anything, "you're right. she's coming over today." "qiqi wants to meet her," qiqi states, but then doesn't continue as her attention is diverted by a butterfly flying around her. xiao glances at his watch, "at this rate, you probably will. baizhu's late, as usual." "dr baizhu... qiqi doesn't remember his face," qiqi returns to trailing her finger along the lines of the ground.

suddenly, xiao hears footsteps and he looks up, only to be met with the sight of you right in front of him! "hey, xiao!" you beam excitedly, clasping your hands behind your back as you grin at him. both xiao's brain and his heart nearly explode simultaneously because; 1) you look way too adorable in your outfit - sure, it's just casual clothes, but still, how do you always manage to look stunning?! and 2) he cannot believe that you actually came and didn't bail on him, and you're standing here outside his house! and you're going to stay here for the night! xiao doesn't know how he's going to survive the rest of the day without getting a heart attack.

"oh, y/n! hi," he says, hoping neither his shyness nor his flusteredness show on his expression. however, before he can say anything else, he's interrupted by qiqi popping up between the two of you. "oh. you are really pretty," the young girl states bluntly as she looks up at you. heat rushes to your face at the innocent compliment, but then you realise something odd and query, "thank you! but wait, you know who i am?" "yes," qiqi states, the smallest hint of a smile curving her lips, "xiao 哥哥 talks about you a lot-" "hahaha qiqi, baizhu's here! it's time for you to go home!" without warning, xiao pulls qiqi into an awkward hug, one hand flying to cover her mouth. while you try to hide your laughter, qiqi stares up at him slowly and nods once, her gaze then travelling to the sleek black car which has just driven up.

the window rolls down, and an unknown man with a pet snake coiled around his neck calls out, "sorry for being late, xiao! qiqi, hop in." he glances at you, and his eyes narrow, almost like a predator gazing at his prey, "now who are you?" "i'm y/n, xiao's genmate in genshin," you reply, perceiving him to be harmless. but then xiao steps in front of you and growls, "leave her alone, baizhu. she doesn't want your dumb services." baizhu feigns an affronted expression, "how mean! i'm merely a doctor." "yeah, a shady one," xiao mutters under his breath as he helps qiqi buckle her seatbelt. "you wound me, xiao," baizhu smirks, to which xiao answers, "good," and shuts the door. before baizhu drives away, qiqi peers up through the window and gives the two of you a small wave, "byebye, xiao 哥哥. byebye, y/n." you wave back at her, internally freaking out over how adorable she is, "byebye!"

as soon as the car disappears into the distance, you bump your hip against xiao's, "so, xiao, care to tell me what you've talked about me? it's apparently a lot~." xiao's face flushes, and he really hopes you think it's because of the summer sun, "let's just go inside, y/n." with a happy giggle, you decide to stop teasing xiao and follow him into his house.

───────────────

"holy shoot xiao, your setup is so cool!" you gush in awe as you step into xiao's 'streaming room'. it's lit by led lights, which are currently set to a dark teal greenish shade, mimicking the highlights in xiao's hair. there's a small fridge in the corner of the room, and when xiao pads over to open it and take out a drink for the two of you, you realise it's filled almost entirely with energy drinks. "is that even healthy...?" you accidentally say out loud, prompting xiao to turn back to you and ask, "is what healthy?" "ah! nothing!" you panic, "just the sheer amount of energy drinks in there." xiao seems to be much more in his element in his familiar streaming room, and his features relax into a soft smile as he tosses you a can, "don't worry, i don't drink them all the time." "oh, that's good then," you fumble to catch it and reply, feeling as if you're making this ten times more awkward then it should be. archons, transferring online relationships to real life is so much more difficult than it seems.

to break the sudden silence, you quickly ask, "so, who was that little girl out there? i'm going to take a guess and assume you don't have a kid." "no, she's not my daughter!" the tips of xiao's ears turn red, and you stifle a chuckle - it's so easy to fluster him. "her name's qiqi, she's a young girl that i rescued on the street, she was all alone and just claimed she didn't know where her parents were. i couldn't just leave her like that, so i took her in, and later aether told me about his doctor friend baizhu, who's the creep you met outside," xiao leans against his desk, cupping the can of drink in one hand and seeming to drift off into his memories. "he didn't seem like that much of a creep," you shrug, cracking open the can to take a sip. xiao's eyes flash with a trace of an unknown emotion... jealousy, perhaps? then after a moment of contemplation he responds, "yeah, he isn't all bad. after all, he took qiqi under his wing without hesitation."

it's only now that you realise how incredible xiao looks. the afternoon sun filters in through the window, bathing him in a gentle glow, and he seems so at ease compared to the aloof version of him from the online collaborations you've had with him. he's dressed in a simple black hoodie, and wonky black nail polish adorns his nails - you assume qiqi painted them for him. in fact, you barely hear his reply from how captivated you've become in admiring his appearance. only when xiao clears his throat do you snap out of your thoughts, "y/n, you're staring. is there something on my face?" "no, no, no! nothing at all!" you turn away, praying to every deity you know that the flaming heat you can feel on your face isn't obvious to him.

trying to turn the tables, you comment, "don't think i'm letting go of the fact that you talk about me." xiao groans, "oh no." you spin around, having managed to successfully conceal your embarrassment and prance up to him with a playful grin, "i'm so honoured to have the famous xiao praise me!" xiao drags a hand down his face slowly, hiding his expression, "y/n..." "i'm kidding!" you giggle, "but seriously, it's cute that you talk about me. only good things though, i hope." "of course, what else is there to say?" xiao's eyes flick up to yours from how he was attempting to look literally anywhere else in the room. what catches you off guard is the genuineness in his tone, he isn't spewing sleazy compliments to grab your attention, he's saying what he actually thinks, and that makes your heart do several backflips. "well... i talk about you to my friends too," you mumble, and xiao's eyes widen, "really?!" "yeah."

silence blankets the room, and both of you are unwilling to shatter the moment. it's almost as if you want to freeze this second in time, this second where both of you seem so eager to fall in love, yet shy and hesitant too. finally, xiao coughs, "y/n, should i start teaching you how to play val now? you can use the second desktop right beside mine." "sure!" you answer, plopping into the comfy chair next to his - you recognise it from his streams. the excited smile you shoot xiao as you open up the game is almost like an arrow from cupid right through his heart.

───────────────

"ahhh, i'm tired," you lean back in your seat, cracking your knuckles and stretching. when you glance out the window, the sun's already beginning to dip below the horizon, a sign reminding you of how long you and xiao have been playing. you both made dummy accounts to practice, and had a fun afternoon messing around in game, with xiao guiding you through valorant's mechanics and you picking it up as quick as you could. although xiao's aim obviously far outshone yours, you were pretty sure you could be considered a worthy opponent now. "yeah, we should probably stop playing for now," xiao says, looking at you with a concerned gaze. "can i look around?" you ask, ensuring you receive xiao's permission before poking around his stuff. "go ahead, i need to sort out a thumbnail for tomorrow's stream." "yay! if you need any help, you better ask me! don't be a dumbass and try to do it all on your own," you warn, shaking your finger at him. a chuckle escapes his throat, and xiao nods before beginning to scroll through twitter, searching for fanart of the two of you to use as part of the thumbnail.

you hop from the chair, strolling straight towards the shelf at the back of the room. you've seen it briefly during xiao's streams, but due his background always being slightly blurred, you've never been able to make out what's actually on it, and you've also always been quite curious about it. as you scan each rack, you notice each one has something different on it. the first shelf has a bunch of potted succulents and books, the second has a couple of anime character figurines and some dvds- wait, hang on a minute. "xiao?" "mhm?" "is this my debut commemorative voice merch? you know, those voicelines they made us record for our 1 month anniversary." xiao nearly falls off his chair as he spins around faster than the speed of light to face you, "n-no! i mean yes! it is, but i bought everyone's from our generation, just to support you all." you giggle softly, "strange though, i don't see yanfei and hu tao's here. nor your own, which is even weirder." "ah, theirs must be somewhere around here in this mess. and why would i buy my own voicelines? that's just narcissistic." xiao's excuse is completely made up, and it's almost painfully obvious - there's not a hair out of place in his room, you have no clue what mess he's talking about. it's cute though, so you'll let it slide.

just then, something on the third shelf catches your attention, and a mischievous smile graces your features. "xiao?" you call out again, and he turns to reply to you, "yeah?" however, as soon as he faces you, you shoot a bullet at him from the toy nerf gun in your hand, and (un)fortunately, it smacks him right in the face, "gotcha!" xiao is stunned, and he freezes up for a second, causing you to worry you've annoyed him. lucky for you, the next second he laughs softly before smirking at you with gleaming golden eyes, "oh, it is on."

xiao grabs another toy gun from somewhere on his desk and aims it at you, prompting you to squeal and run away. once you're safely outside his room, you stick your tongue out, "you'll never catch me, xiao!" he merely fires off a plastic bullet at you, "yeah right, "and you dart your head around the corner to dodge. as you lean against the wall, you exhale in relief, but then squeeze your eyes shut in mortification - what on earth were you thinking, shooting xiao like that? now he was going to think you were a total child, he was probably playing along just to stop the situation from becoming awkward.

groaning internally, you turn back around the corner, preparing yourself to apologise but then- you smack into something. "ah!" a surprised sound escapes your throat at the same time as you hear a grunt from right above you. you open your eyes slowly, only to be met with xiao's amber irises. both time and your brain seem to freeze as you meet his gaze, and only after a split second which feels like an eternity do you process what happened. the two of you quickly move backwards from your position of bumping into him, and xiao coughs once, trying to dismiss the embarrassing atmosphere. instead of saying anything though, he aims his nerf gun at you and shoots you right in the centre of your torso. with a small, slightly smug smirk adorning his lips, xiao tilts his head, "told you i'd catch you." suddenly, laughter bubbles up from your lips, and you grin at him, "the game isn't over yet, xiao!" with that, you shoot back at him and take off at a dash down the corridor, leaving xiao to pursue you.

perhaps he doesn't think you're that much of a child after all.

groupchat !

irl !

the sound of the bathroom door opening prompts you to switch off your phone and glance upwards from how you were perched on a beanbag on the floor of xiao's bedroom. ever the gentleman, he had encouraged you to shower first, claiming he didn't mind waiting. he was showering right now, or at least he was supposed to be. the sight you're gazing at now seems to prove otherwise.

xiao has stepped out of the bathroom, wearing only a loose pair of black shorts. you blink once, then twice, before realising that no, you aren't hallucinating; xiao is actually shirtless in front of you. your eyes trace up his torso, widening upon noticing his perfectly defined set of abs. no wonder it hurt so much when you crashed into him earlier. a loose white towel is tossed carelessly around his neck, and it provides a stark contrast to the dark green tattoos snaking around his incredibly toned upper arms in an intricate pattern. droplets of water still cling to his jade-streaked hair, framing his face like a picture. his amber eyes glimmer like jewels, and you find yourself wondering what it would be like to get lost in them.

then suddenly, you snap out of your daze and realise how perverted you sound. covering your eyes with your hand, you ask playfully, pretending like your cheeks aren't flaming hot, "xiao, did you mean to give me such a show?" "what?!" from what you can hear, xiao seems to whirl around and remember you're in his room too. "i... i forgot my shirt, that's all," he says quickly, embarrassment filling his tone, "i'm going to change." "mmkay," you reply with a chuckle, peeking through your fingers to see a very flustered xiao rush back into the bathroom and slam the door, "don't make me wait too long!"

───────────────

"no way!" you fold your arms across your chest and pout like a petulant child, frowning at xiao. "i meant that i'll take the sofa, you can have the bed," xiao says confusedly, not understanding why you're upset. "let me take the sofa, i'll feel bad if i'm kicking you out of your own room!" "no," xiao replies promptly and decisively, leaving no room for argument. as a final attempt, you suggest, "then why don't we just share the bed?" xiao fell silent, and you realised the tips of his ears have turned red - archons, he's so cute! "of course, if you don't want to, that's fine as well! i don't mind taking the couch," you add on quickly, not wanting to pressure him into anything he was uncomfortable with. "no!" he speaks up, "i don't mind sharing the bed... if you're alright with it too." a huge grin paints itself across your cheeks, and for xiao, it was almost like seeing sunshine break through the clouds on a rainy day.

and that is how you ended up sharing a bed with the one and only adeptus xiao.

although right now, you're kinda starting to regret it. it's far too difficult to fall asleep when you can feel xiao's warmth beside you, even though there's a thin bolster between you both. "hey xiao?" you ask, the two words breaking the silence. "hm?" "today was really fun!" you turn around to face him, and upon realising he's already facing you, you beam at him. "yeah, it was," xiao murmurs, a small smile curving his lips. he seems to already be half-asleep, and you wonder if this is a consequence of the endurance stream that he pulled yesterday. he probably hasn't slept since then.

"hey xiao?" you ask again, your voice much softer this time, tinged with a hint of hesitation. "mm?" he really is almost asleep now, but for some reason you've just got a huge burst of confidence, so you press on. "would it be okay if i... slept closer to you?" the question escapes your lips in a whisper, and you almost want to cover your face to hide from his reply. but xiao merely opens his golden catlike eyes, heavy with sleepiness, and stares at you for a moment as if weighing his options. then wordlessly, he moves the bolster away and opens his arms to you.

trying to hide your joy from his lack of a rejection, you cuddle closer to him, and his arm wraps around your torso. there's no other way to say it, both of you are actually cuddling now. and you're this close to spontaneously combusting. xiao smells like qingxin petals, you think to yourself absently as he rests his chin on your head. you don't dare move, lest you ruin the peace, but as your eyes slide shut, you murmur softly, "goodnight, xiao. good luck for tomorrow." you're not sure if you've already started dreaming when you feel a shy kiss on the top of your head and a quiet reply, "goodnight, y/n. sweet dreams."

a/n; HELLOOOO AHHHHH THE ENDING AKWJDJKASKJDSA CRIES /POS this chapter took like 750 years im so sorry T_T i hope u enjoyed it loads tho, i had sm fun writing it JKDKJSD there were so many cute moments here. yeah i wanna have a nerf gun fight w xiao what abt it??? HAHAHA ok i better go sleep now i have school tmrw pain </3 YOU ALL BETTER REBLOG THIS WITH FUN COMMENTS OR I WILL EAT YOU /J (pls do, this took ages and also send me some swag asks abt it pls and thank u hehe)

rin came up w the idea of xiao having qiqi as a sorta younger sister here !

and xiao's room inspo is half inspired from luca's ask here !

aaaa i love how i get to interact w you guys abt cynosure and incorporate ur super sexc ideas omg (with permission ofc) :D !! thank u for supporting cynosure so far, and i hope you all continue to enjoy it until the end mwah <3333

taglist (closed); @noirkkat @bookuya @ohmykazuha @glazelilyy @oreoz-unfortunately @tiny-aroace @xiaophobic @test-tube @jiinghe @storytravelled @mirikusashes @ben6ett @oliviasslut @velionqs @bluexiao @lunachelly @aelatus @mimion @akiiyukii @angelhxneyy @give-xiao-almond-tofu @abyssheart @xuanya @normalisthenewnorm @viagiraffe @fuhuashandholder @astersg4rden @dilucbar @eternism-deactivated20210821 @nachotrash @childe-support @cynokine @axerrri @albedos-apprentice @kait-is-always-late @hushyouu @celestair @rim0na @indecisivehusky @nurserinnn @ariesreii @saving-for-xiao @hellokittykuroo @auradragon199 @xiaoszn @ayaka-wrld @almondto-fu

usernames in bold could not be tagged :( pls do lmk if u have changed ur username/want to be removed from the taglist by sending in an ask!

general masterlist.

© starglitterz 2021. do not repost or modify in any way.

#[📱] ━━━ cynosure ! #xiao x reader #xiao fluff #xiao imagines #xiao drabbles #xiao genshin impact #genshin impact xiao #genshin xiao #genshin impact fluff #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #genshin imagines #genshin impact writing #genshin impact drabbles #genshin impact #xiao #genshin impact smau #genshin smau #genshin modern au #xiao smau #genshin impact xiao smau #genshin au #genshin impact au #genshin fake texts #genshin impact fake texts #genshin impact series #genshin series #xiao scenarios

[inevitably-johnlocked]

hi steph! how are you today? in case you or anyone needs it, here's your reminder to stay hydrated and take care of yourself or i'll grab ur ankles LMAO i'm just kidding.

not a fic req actually but i wanted to ask for some advice about collecting fics. i love how organized you make them and i'm thinking about starting one for a different fandom myself. who better to ask than the literal lifesaver for everything johnlock?

you don't need to give any if you don't want to and i mean that. anything and everything would be massively appreciated <33

another thing i wanted to ask was where do you keep your lists? (other than the full fic rec list you have linked on your acc) I was thinking of using a google doc and taking advantage of the outline feature.

oop- this ask is getting a bit too long. i hope you and whoever else reads this has a great day!! love u <33

Hey Nonny!

Ahh, sorry I took so long to reply to this! I knew the answers existed elsewhere and I just couldn't remember which posts they were.

I wrote some posts in the past that answered the organization question before:

I want to start a fic rec blog in another fandom, any advice?? (Long post with links to my other informative posts. This post is the most recent and will be the best one to read first)

I wanna start a fic rec blog, any tips?

How do you sort and organize so many fics?

How do I start a blog like yours?

As for where I keep my lists? RTF files in a folder on my desktop.

Would NOT recommend this method LOL. It only works for me because I HATE changing a method I have streamlined over 3 or 4 years and can now just do really quickly.

Oh and I keep an offline RTF file of every post on my blog since 20...18? 17? The fic lists START about half way down my RTF file, and all the fic-related posts end about 3/4 down. This document is 300 pages at 2.6 mb currently. If you know anything about text file sizes... 2 MB is HUGE for a text file that has no images in it, LOL. I should post it up for y’all to see. You want a meta masterpost, that’s the ultimate masterpost, LOL

All my fics themselves are sorted on separate lists, the three most used ones on my desktop for ease of access (Ao3, FFNet, and MFLs).

So yeah, my sorting method is a cluster of fuckery, honestly, hahha. I would not START with my method. Do a spreadsheet or your outline idea, hahah. Seriously will probably make it less stressful, LOL.

ANYWAY, please feel free to ask me anything I don't cover above that you have more questions about. I love talking about my dorky sorting methods, because it's so absurd that people LITERALLY don't believe me until I show them how much work running a fic rec blog is and how ridiculously my brain works. Gives me a good chuckle.

Cheers, Lovely <3

#steph replies #my blog #my advice #chatting with nonnies #my tutorials

[tellywoodtrash]

Hey, gonna bring something dark here (tw: rape), so please do not read further and delete this if it's a trigger for you ❤️

.

.

.

.

.

.

Did you see what's happening with Pearl Puri? He was arrested for raping a minor? And God, his tag has been trending, with people jumping to his defense.

I've always been vocal about normalizing of problematic, abusive nonsense in our media. We all know ITV is particularly guilty of this, and one of the reasons I've been following your blog for years now is because you also call out this absolute fucking nonsense. I've gotten a lot of flak for how much I call all this out irl- 'separate fiction from reality, don't be such a feminist, stop taking everything so seriously' blah blah blah. I'm completely capable of separating fiction from reality, which is why I let myself watch all this trash for entertainment. I worry because not all audiences can do that. I'm an adult woman capable of critical thinking, but there's no denying that young, impressionable girls are also exposed to this content.

What I worry about is situations like what I'm seeing today- young girls in the tag jumping to his defense, because they've seen his character, and they like him, and interviews mein he seemed sweet. I'm not saying the normalization of toxic content is the sole reason for people reacting like this, but I can't deny that the phrases being used are the same ones used by the same fan accounts to justify toxic characters- 'Feminist agenda to blame men' and 'playing the woman card' and 'men are misunderstood in our society, we must give benefit of doubt.' It's hard to not wonder whether lines between reel and real are getting blurred for some young audiences, and it honest to God terrifies me.

Yes, Pearl could be innocent. But he could also not. Why give him the benefit of doubt, and not the minor girl? When will we start believing victims, and stop throwing the exceedingly rare false cases in their faces? I'm also so disappointed by celebrities jumping in with social media support. If he's your friend and you truly believe him, great, you know him personally so you actually have more grounds to believe him than fangirls who like his interviews. I get it, but support him offline na? I'm sure he can stay away from insta for a few days if the online negativity is such a problem. But this just seems like jumping on the bandwagon of a trending topic, when investigation is ongoing. I have seen Anita Hassanandani, Ekta Kapoor, Surbhi Jyoti, Karishma Tanna, Nia Sharma...all these women come to his defense...stay the hell out till the investigation happens, and then do all these #truthwins crap.

Idk how I feel about all this, but it's certainly disheartening. I'm sorry again for bringing all this to your inbox, so please, do feel fully free to delete this message and not respond. Love always to you ❤️

Hi friend!

I certainly appreciate the trigger warning and the consideration in your message. 💞💞💞

I mean, you said everything that I am thinking and feeling. I think as a viewer, I am okay to consume this kind of trash because I am constantly (over)analyzing everything I consume. I am also very very aware that I don’t know a lot of things due to my upper-caste cishet privilege and thus am constantly open to learning. If one is not that kind of discerning, and not doing that kinda work to educate themselves, then they frankly shouldn’t be watching this crap coz lord, the amount of brain rot I am seeing due to people not being able to differentiate between onscreen and off.

I simply do not understand why people can’t get over their bias to think about the sheer power dynamic in this case: he’s a rich celebrity with tons of support from influential people, and the victim is/was a MINOR. Even if the accusation is false, what has he suffered? Literally nothing. He spent a few hours in jail and then will be vindicated. What if the accusation is true? The victim has gone through so much more; a crime of a sexual nature, WHILE BEING UNDERAGE, and then no doubt lots of persecution when filing a report against someone so powerful, and now a social media pile-on, and a trauma that they will have to work on their whole life to overcome. It’s literally not comparable. Fuck people who cannot understand this kinda basic concept.

I’m tired, i’m just fucking tired of it all. I just can wish power to those who have suffered and continue to suffer. May they be believed, may they receive justice, and in the process, if all of this fakeass, meaningless glitz and glamour burns down to the ground to never ever rise again, so fucking be it.

#tt answers

[theyarebothgunshot]

only hit me right now that misha just... posted jensen’s face everywhere. what a mood lmao, and also a marketing king.

literally, mish. dee. king and queen of marketing and being sentimental. we love to see it

more after the cut

This was just the burst of serotonin I needed

😊

God bless Mishdee 💙❤️

same i feel blessed but also spoiled, how am i gonna make it until saturday?

Holy cow, I was busy most of the day and apparently missed loving Misha hours written, produced and starring the Ackles! This is. A. LOT. Like, the "Mish. Dee." comment is what started to convince me that there actually is something there, but omg today! Today is really something else. Like. I can't quite articulate, but the vibes are impeccable. They're so proud of him! They're leaving no room for interpretation lol it's all-caps, bold red font "WE LOVE AND SUPPORT YOU MISH!" - Honeymoon Anon

honestly you chose one hell of a day to be offline!! hsdfhsdfh but i am glad you got caught up, it's. a lot!!!! and you're so right: no room for doubt. i love that

Ok but the way that Misha sounded in his reply makes me think he had no idea what Dee was about to post, like he was just as surprised as the rest of us🥺🥺🥺 Bestie I can’t take this anymore -poker face anon

YES god it's soooooo! words cannot describe tbh

Anyways you don’t have to post this if you’re about to hit post limit but Misha Collins I would like to give you a hug😤 -poker face anon

i didnt hit post limit but i did get tired sdfhsdhf and yes, please i just wanna hug himmmm (well and more, but rn mostly hug him)

He put it on FACEBOOK of all places

he's an old man (affectionate) <3

"if I had Jensen I would do the same! So would you!" AND SO MUCH MORE.

Someone should probably take my phone away from me at this point. The brain rot has gone terminal, I cannot be normal about Mr. Ankles or any of them.

In all seriousness tho, I do think it's heartwarming that they're so openly supportive of each other. Whatever the nature of their relationship(s), it's just really nice to see. (But also Danneel and Jensen are too attractive for me to not be Like This) 🍕

exactlyyy, like. they care SO SO much about each other and it's truly heartwarming to see, especially after the world went to shit (aka pandemic) and misha went through so much personal shit. i am glad he has the ackles'

#honeymoon anon #anonymous #poker face anon #pizza anon

[imagines-forthe-soul]

Is there still room for this?? If so, small scenarios for the Adult Trio (Aizawa, Hizashi and Toshinori) being sent nudes by their fem s/o and them asking for the men to send one back? Pls and thanks.

Toshi’s is rather long but it’s totally not because I love him like fucking crazy

_______________________

Fic type: Naughty

_______________________________________________

Aizawa Shouta:

If there was one thing that was certain in this man’s life, it was that he hardly ever used his phone. It was honestly it seemed as if he had never been introduced to the technology, being completely unaware of the reality that everyday people had small rectangular devices in their pockets that let them communicate and interact with other from distances away. Not even his closest friend knew he had a phone for a good while until Aizawa checked it for a message you had sent him once. It was the only time he ever picked up his phone and actually interacted with it. He had you give yourself a special ringtone on his phone for whenever you called or texted him, letting him know that it was you before he even dared to pick it up. So, upon hearing the little chime of bells that came from his phone, he picked it up, looking at his notifications to see what you had sent him before he responded.

‘Photo message from Kitten’

For a moment he wondered when you made the time to change your name to that, but in the next moment he was opening your message, prepared to see your shared cat Shadow or something harmless. His breath turned to stone in his chest as an image of you dressed in only a pair of black lace panties popped up on his screen, your bare breasts hanging exposed for him to see, a single hand reaching up to prod at your slightly parted lips, glossed over with what he could only hope was that fruity lip gloss you knew he loved. His eyes were glued onto the imagine, drinking in how beautiful you were, the way your body was shaped, the way your skin seemed to glow even in such dim lighting. He could see himself tarnishing that very skin with various forms of love marks, but before he could get too deep into his thoughts, another message from his not-so-innocent Kitten popped up under the photo.

“You left me too soon this morning…I’m so cold and lonely. I wish you were back here to warm me up…but I know you’re busy, so in the meantime, why don’t you send me something that’ll warm me up?”

The stone he had once felt in his chest had now turned to hot magma as he read your message, imagining you sweetly your voice would say those words. A sly grin formed on his face, fingers tapping away at the screen of his phone before he pocketed it, his grin only growing at how frustrated he pictured you getting over his message. Before he got back to his work, he made sure to turn the volume of his ringtone up as he awaited more messages from you.

“It was pretty naughty of you to send something like this to me when you know I’m at work, Kitten. You know being naughty doesn’t get you what you want, so you’re going to have to make it up to me.”

Yamada Hizashi:

Hizashi loved to text and scroll through different social media feeds. He loved seeing new memes and sending them to you when he thought there was something you would find funny. If you were being honest, you loved it too, but what you didn’t love was the fact that he would send you memes and text you during his work hours. On multiple occasions he had even told you that he was texting you all to avoid work, and more often than that, Shouta and Toshinori would ask you to tell him to stop goofing off during work so that he could get things done. You had tried going offline on certain social media as to discourage him from texting or messaging you, but he would call you instead if he couldn’t get you on anything else, chatting you up in a way that made it hard for you to close the conversation and end the call. You were almost at your wits end with how to get him to stop goofing off and texting you during work before you remembered a very important fact about Hizashi; he loved bribes. Offering this man a gift or prize would be a surefire way to get him to get his mind into his work and get it finished, and you knew just what you had to offer him for him to take it seriously. So one day, before Hizashi could even send you the first of  many texts for the day, you had beat him to the punch.

‘One video message from My Bodacious Babe’

He was more than happy to have you text him first that day, opening your message without second thoughts, hoping that you were sending him a meme or some funny video that would become your weekly inside joke. However, that was far from what he actually got. Instead, as the video played, he witnessed your hands roam your naked body, teasing different areas of yourself that even he knew usually drove you crazy. He could hear your soft little pants and whimper as your fingers teasingly glided over the soft folds of the pussy he loved to smother his face in. His entire body felt as though it were being pulled back and pushed forward at the same time, making him fidget in his seat as he felt himself grow so hard and heavy in his pants. Just as he thought you were about to slip those gorgeous fingers inside of you, you panned the camera up, showing him your flushed but smirking face.

“If you want to see more and later get in on this action, you’ll have to get today’s work done, okay, baby? I’m sure you can do that for me. When you’re all done work, you can come home and I’ll even do that thing you like. See ya~”

Yagi Toshinori:

It was a well known fact that Toshi was easy to fluster. The simplest of compliments could make this hulking man burst into a flustered frenzy, cheeks red and mouth trying to find the right words to thank you but only sputtering and having his words trip over his own tongue. You found this to be all too cute, often teasing him for getting so embarrassed about being praised and complimented. Often times you would give him little compliments when he was doing his work just to see him unravel into a warm mess of a man at your kind words. However, the real icing on the cake was seeing him come undone by your more raunchy compliments and words of praise. The mortified yet intrigued expression that would form on his face at your lewd words would send you into a fit of giggles every time. He made it too easy to tease him in such a way, but you always made it rather interesting with the ways in which you would tease him just to see him flush shades of red deeper than any fire. You had worn his clothes and nothing more to surprise him when he got home, or whispered sweetly scandalous things in his ear. Hell you had even done the lingerie under the trenchcoat act on him. All of these stunts had gotten their desired reactions from Toshi, filling you with satisfaction. However, there was still something you had yet to try, but you were sure that it would really put this poor man six feet under for how much blood would inevitably leave his brain and travel down south.

“New Image Message from My Dear Lady”

Now, Toshinori, being the innocent man that he is, never expects your little schemes and acts to make him nervous and giddy. So when he received a message from you, he was more than happy to stop what little work he was doing at the moment to speak with you, but no words could slip past his lips at what he saw. The image was of you, his beautiful and stunning partner, stripped of your clothes. One hand held the camera as you took the picture, angling it in the perfect way that made your breasts all the more alluring. Your plush thighs were pushed together, but Toshinori could see the small sliver of yellow peeking out between them, none other than the dildo you had custom ordered to match his hero costume as well as his size. If the image wasn’t enough to already make him feel as though he was melting, the voice message you sent him afterwards would do the trick. Hesitantly, he would let it play, putting it on the lowest volume for only him to hear.

“Toshi…Toshi…yes~” His ears were hit with none other than the beautiful symphony of your moans, calling out his name, begging for him, needing him so desperately. White dots sprinkled his vision the longer he stared at the image and voice note you had sent him, his mind becoming a haze of warmth and white strings all tightening together, pulling his thoughts every which way. The hard press of his cock against his pants made him grit his teeth, and - as if you had some cosmic connection to him - you sent him another voice note, one that would give him almost everything he craved in this very moment. He pressed play.

“Toshi… I want you… I want to see you… and feel you.. Please.”

Faster than he could save 30 innocent lives, Toshi’s hands disposed of his pants and boxers, pulling them down farther than he needed to, letting his hard cock spring upwards and slap against his clothed stomach as he fumbled to hold his phone steady in his hand to snap a picture and send it back to you.

Wanna see some other shit I’ve written?

#boku no hero academia #bnha #aizawa shouta #aizawa shouta x reader #hizashi yamada #hizashi yamada x reader #toshinori yagi x reader #toshinori yagi #bnha present mic #bnha all might #bnha aizawa #boku no hero academia imagines #bnha imagines #boku no hero #bnha scenarios #bnha writing #lemon #clean this up

[loxxxlay]

my friend changed her mind about the thing on account of it screwing me over. we had a long talk last night. it helped me understand why i was sad - basically because it was a moment where my perception of her was challenged and i learned a hard truth about how i fit into her life?

like, i had always assumed that she was like me. i tend to disclose all my plans for the future to my closest friends at all times. theyre involved in every decision i make and every goal im aiming toward. my love language is words of affirmation which i think is a big reason behind that. also while i like to think my friends are the most important thing in my life, i have to admit that my need to achieve my goals (other than working in publishing industry) has never competed with my close friendships. ive never had to choose bewteen them.

for her, she keeps things to herself and doesnt disclose anything until she comes to a decision (or is close to coming to one). her love language is different than mine (quality time), so telling me everything she's thinking at all times isnt really how she does friendships. so thats kinda reassuring and makes me feel less... betrayed? its not that she doesnt love me and its not that i dont know her as well as i thought i did. its just that we show our love in different ways which causes conflict sometimes.

and also unlike me, her dreams/goals have been directly conflicting with her friendships for years and years. since high school. and shes been choosing friendships for years and suffering for it. so thats been really hard on her. she's trying to find a way to have both obviously, but i kinda understand the situation shes in better now. and while it hurts me a little that she will put her dreams before me at some point even if not now (because i think i would put friends before my dreams tbh :/), ultimately i want her to be happy. i want her to achieve her goals. maybe in the next few years, we can find a way for her to achieve them without straining her friendships but for now she's changed her mind for me.

i still feel really upset, like my whole world and stability and trust has been totally shaken :/ even though it went back to normal, now I know that it can change in an instant. and thats hard to live with.

but i think the worst of the pain is over for me. not a single sobbing episode today, for example. i just need to readjust my perception of her and my life and everything. ill never be as happy as i was probably but i was only so happy by mistake. things were different than i thought, and its better to try to be happy while knowing the truth than through a lie.

so yeah thats where im at. ive been working late this week (partly to keep my brain busy), so i havent been able to answer all the super encouraging and supportive replies i got yet, but i read them all and i seriously cant thank each of u enough. i was in a really bad place and i couldnt talk to any offline friends about it. so to get support from somewhere was really necessary, and im so grateful for ppl providing that and more. thank you so much T.T ❤❤❤

edit: oh and to be clear, she changed her mind on her own and messaged me first. i didnt guilt trip her or anything. thats partly why i wss exploding because it felt like i couldnt be sad in her presence without guilt tripping so i had to be fake happy until she decided. so yeah, the decision was all hers. i am a mature adult lmao

#lox talks personal

[365daysofsasuhina]

[ 365 Days of SasuHina || Day Three Hundred Fifty-Eight: Surprises ] [ Uchiha Sasuke, Hyūga Hinata ] [ SasuHina, pregnancy ] [ Verse: Best Years of Your Life ] [ AO3 Link ]

He’s always done his best to be careful. Sasuke has never been a fan of surprises. Everything in its proper order, proper place, with proper planning and thus his ability to know how to react.

...but Life doesn’t always work that way. Life, as full of patterns as it can be, is still ultimately chaos.

Working on a rather lengthy assignment for his engineering class, dark eyes flicker up as his computer makes an all too familiar sound of receiving a message.

Hey, you busy?

A corner of his lips quirk as his girlfriend pokes in to check on him. His pencil is abandoned, keyboard taken up as he replies, Just typical homework. Need something?

No, just kinda lonely. My class for today got cancelled and I’m all caught up with coursework. But I won’t bug you if you’re busy <3

A brow perks. ...you can come over it you want. At least that way you wouldn’t be alone. It’s just engineering - I can chat and work at the same time.

A minute passes with no reply. But before he can add something else, she offers, ...oh...okay.

...okay, something is up. What’s wrong?

Nothing!

Nothing my ass. I know your disappointed texting tone by now. Just be frank with me, Hinata. What’s up?

Another minute of silence. I just, um...wanted to spend some time with you.

...meaning? By now he has an idea of what she’s getting at, but he wants to make her admit it. He’s never above flustering her, after all. She was such a timid, prude little thing when they met.

She sends a pouting emote. :T Sasukeee…

Don’t ‘Sasukeee’ me. Communicate with me, babe. Tell me what you want.

...I...want to fool around a bit…

There we go. The truth comes out. Smirking at his screen, he replies, ...I think I can take a break enough for that. You just get yourself over here and we’ll figure the rest out.

Okay…! Um...should I bring anything…?

Nah, I’ve got it covered. All I need is you.

Signing off to begin crossing from her dorm to his, Hinata’s status goes offline, and Sasuke decides to call it quits a little early. Tidy as he is, there’s a bit to be picked up in his (thankfully solo) dorm room. Gotta have everything just right, after all. Once clothes are picked up, trash binned, and bed made, he lounges at his desk until a soft knock sounds.

“Come on in.”

Hinata peers around a bit sheepishly, stepping in and closing the door. “Hey…”

“Hey gorgeous.”

“Sasuke…”

“What? Just being honest.”

“You’re r-ridiculous.”

“And yet you love me anyway,” he retorts lowly, grinning as she crosses the room.

“Somehow, yes,” she replies, smiling warmly at him. Knowing his chair isn’t exactly built for two people, she instead grips the arms, leaning over him coyly. “So...ready to take a study break…?”

“For you, any time.” Hands lift to cup at her cheeks, pulling her down to mesh their lips. Hinata breathes a soft sigh, smelling like lilac as she always does. If she ever changes body wash, he’ll be glaringly disappointed. Kissing her slowly until she’s out of breath, he then abandons his seat and stands, grip moving to her waist. The feeling of her hands on his chest - even atop his shirt - makes the skin beneath them warm. “I think your classes need to get cancelled more often,” he murmurs against her mouth, shifting to pay attention to the curve of her jaw.

“I w-wouldn’t mind it,” she agrees, tilting her head for his access. “But I can’t take you away from your homework all the time, can I…? You can’t start failing your classes over a girl, silly.”

“I’m used to crunch time. It’d be worth it…”

Giggling, Hinata lets him push her over atop his mattress, eyes warm with affection as he crawls over. “Then I guess I won’t feel bad.”

“Oh no...you’re going to feel anything but bad…” he rumbles, smirking as her cheeks flush pink.

Once all is said and done, the pair of them tired and satisfied, Sasuke hauls himself up and tidies again, leaving Hinata to sleep as he cracks away at more of his assignment. It’s not due until midnight - he’s got plenty of time. And now he’s got a freshly-bolstered mood on top of it all.

No sweat.

...well, some sweat. But not at all homework related.

From there, life goes on as normal. Classes, homework, visits home...and across campus to invade one another’s dorm rooms. They’re both in their last years, and while the pressure is indeed ramping up, they try to take things one day at a time.

But just as graduation looms...something changes. Texts go unanswered, calls go straight to voicemail...and no matter the hour of the day, Hinata isn’t online.

While Sasuke at first puts it down to crunch time...after a few days, he starts to seriously worry. His messages get a little more desperate, asking her to please reply. But still nothing. A visit to her dorm find it empty...either that, or she’s refusing to answer.

What the hell is going on?

Finally fed up one day, he lurks outside her door for hours, waiting for her to either come in or go out. Other students give him odd looks as they pass, but he ignores them. Something is wrong, and he needs to know what.

“S...Sasuke…?”

Head snapping up, his eyes go wide as Hinata stares at him from the end of the hall. Immediately, he frowns. Her body language is all sorts of closed off. If anything...she looks ready to bolt. “...Hinata? Shit Hinata, where have you been? Have you been getting my messages?”

“...I -?”

“I’ve been worried sick! I thought something happened to you!” Abandoning his leaned perch against the wall, he jogs to meet her, slowing and gripping her upper arms firmly. “...are you okay?”

At the question, her eyes suddenly tear up, shoulders shaking against withheld sobs.

Okay, red flag, what the hell?

“...here, let’s - let’s get inside your dorm and talk, okay? Everything’s going to be okay. I’ve got you.” Putting an arm around her, he gently leads her to the proper door, which she unlocks and then locks behind them. “Hinata, babe...what’s wrong? Please, talk to me.”

Arms hugging herself tightly, she seems to struggle against her emotions. “I...I-I went home. I, um...I wasn’t feeling well. So...I went to see a doctor - a l-lady that I know.”

“...are you all right?”

“I...y-yeah? I mean...technically, yeah, I’m...I’m fine. But Sasuke, I…” Her breath hitches, and a moment passes as she pauses. “...I-I’m really scared…!”

“What do you mean? Why would you be scared?”

Lip trembling, she stares at him as though weighing her words. “...Sasuke, I’m...I’m pregnant.”

His face immediately slackens in surprise. She...but...they’ve always...? “...you’re sure?”

She gives a shaky nod. “...I took t-three at home tests, and then...a clinic test. I’m sure.”

He...isn’t sure what to say. “...w...what do you want to do?”

“I don’t know…!”

“Okay, okay! We’ve...we’ve got time to figure this out. Uh…” A hand rubs at his chin, brain too stuck in its initial panic to really think. “...well...whatever you decide, that’s your decision, Hinata. Not mine. This is your, uh...deal.”

Her gaze averts. “...I-I mean...I’ve always wanted kids, just...I wasn’t really p-planning on it...now.”

“...well, it doesn’t have to be now.”

“...I know. B-but…” She bites her lip. “...in a perfect world, I...I’d like to keep them.”

He gives a slow nod. “...all right. How do we want to make this work?”

At that, Hinata pauses, seemingly taken aback. “Y...you mean you…?”

“What, you think I’m going to run on you now?” he asks. “I thought you knew me better than that.”

“N-no! I...I just...this isn’t exactly the b-best time, and…” Hinata trails off, not sure how to voice her thoughts. “...I thought maybe...maybe it would be...too much.”

Sasuke sighs. “...I mean yeah, it’s...definitely a surprise. But Hinata...look. I…” It’s his turn to fumble. “...I love you. We’ve been together pretty much our entire college careers. And I wasn’t planning on that going away once we graduate. Maybe it’s not how we planned it, but I mean…” He gestures to her. “...I’m here for you. I’ll always be here for you. A bump in the road isn’t going to scare me that easily. I’ve already got work lined up. You’ll have a bit of a late start, but...we can make this work. If that’s what you want.”

“...is it...what you want?”

“...yeah,” he agrees after a pause. “...I love you, Hinata Hyūga. And if things kept working out, then...yeah, I wanted things to progress between us. Kids, marriage, the whole thing. Just because it’s a little soon doesn’t mean I’m against it. Things will be tougher, but...I can do tough.”

Expression crumbling, Hinata crosses to him, arms curled against his chest as she sobs in his arms. “Oh my g-god, I was so worried…”

“...is that why you went AWOL?”

“...I’m sorry...I was just so scared...I-I had to have time to think, and...f-figure out how to talk to you about it.”

“It’s okay...I mean I was worried as hell, but I understand. Just...know you never have to be scared to talk to me, okay? About anything.”

“...I know…”

Sighing, he tucks his chin atop the crown of her head. Well...so much for having a five year plan. But he will make this work.

He’s not the sort to back away from a challenge, after all.

                                                          .oOo.

     SORRY GUYS I know this isn't more of the soulmate AU, but...I couldn't quite figure out how to make this prompt work for it, I'm sorry ;w; I hope this is still enjoyable - a friendo helped me with a plot, and...here we are, lol! I know the tags kinda gave it away, but...I don't want someone stumbling across something they wouldn't want to read, eh heh~      I know some might be disappointed there wasn't more, uh.../nitty gritty/, but I want this series to be able to be read by pretty much everybody in the SH fandom, including those under 18, so...we kinda skipped over that part. I MIGHT do more mature stuff in the future, but...sometimes I'm not the best at it /)///(\ It's a bit of a long reason why, but nsfw stuff isn't always within my ability, I hope you understand!      ANYWAY! I've never really done the whole 'whoops' plot before (well...kinda, but not this ship and not this way). I'm not sure it's very...IC for either of them, since I see Hinata as rather prudish and Sasuke as a bit too careful, but I mean...it's not TOO out there, right? But I think if things DID go awry, they'd handle it...about like this, lol      Anywho...it's VERY late cuz I was working on another project this evening, so I'm gonna head to bed~ Thanks for reading!

#sasuhina #uchiha sasuke #hyūga hinata #pregnancy // #best years of your life [ au ] #365daysofsasuhina

[the-starless-sky]

Creepy Nuts / たりないふたり

Tarinai Futari (The Lacking Duo)

Lyrics： R-shitei Song： DJ Matsunaga

'Sup with you guys? Lots of my men worrying Open your eyes right now Ain't even 'not interested', I down right hate it Drinking party, offline meeting, girls' day out Superiors who can only say "I see, I  understand, yes that's right. Yes!"

Smiling insincerely to the guru-like senior But having the biggest pride Us good guys, scared of girls can't even see them in the eyes, can't speak properly stuttering, emotionally unstable, we sincerely apologize Don't feel like being able to befriend the cheerful types who talks in a huge voice 'cuz they read between the lines, with "Yaaay!" flying around, with no decent brain cells I don't give a fuck I don't like outdoors, I just want to daydream at home I wanna watch movies, wanna read manga, wanna read books But I wanna mate too Aah, so loud, there's nothing good at all Everyday, every night, useless Helpless, with extremely few friends I'm lonely, no, not really

Not enough, there's something lacking in me There's something lacking in you, too I'm sure something's missing, not enough Drink-communication, not enough Enthusiasm and tension, not enough Not enough centripetal force, dynamism, tricks, not enough, not enough, not... A horrible good for nothing full of imperfections, asking for too much We're smeared with pride, hearts broken, psycho friend

This is the lacking duo, I'm Matsunaga, the guy who's never on time, with no delicacy High school and middle school graduate, obstinate and stiff vulgar and careless piece of junk and piece of junk Will probably be laughed at by people again, be hated by people will maybe slip, get chided be thought of as "painful" be thought of as "disgusting" "You say that, but who'd actually care about someone like you?"

I know, I know, I understand, but We're prone to worrying, we immediately hold a grudge ordinary guy, lame kid, half-hearted person, country bumpkin cherry boy, please don't cry anymore Excessive self-consciousness, persecution complex, wildly running for the limelight putting on a prejudiced, bias-tinted glasses, today too my vision's excellent

Not enough, there's something lacking in me There's something lacking in you, too I'm sure something's missing, not enough Status, not enough Fame, not enough Money, fashion Popularity's not enough, not enough, not... A horrible good for nothing full of imperfections, asking for too much We're smeared with pride, hearts broken, psycho friend

I actually want to fool around want to get pampered want to be at the center of everyone's circle, want to be good friends with boys and girls alike I actually want to go to BBQ, too I actually want to make a surprise party, too

Want to upload that picture in Facebook and get lots of likes Want to go to a fashionable cafe Sitting side by side and eating pancakes Want to tweet something smart and get retweeted Want to do this, want to do that Even so, others' eyes are scary I'm lacking in that, lacking in this, in the end it's me that's not enough Cooperativeness, sociability, sociality, flexibility You know what I'm saying? Independence, assertiveness Don't force me, senior, seriously, you're so annoying Planning ability, stability in the future So tiresome, but in the end still gonna introspect Going around in circles, what the hell's up Answer, my men

#creepy nuts #song translation #translation

[breakmebucky]

30 Days to I Do - Day 1

                              The Day They Met (and she saved his neck)              It was a chilly October day when she waltzed into Bucky’s life. Halloween was just around the corner and her pale complexion and dark hair fit in perfectly with the mysterious feeling that hung in the autumn air. Her name was Y/N, and her zest for life was all autumnal with the one exception being her heart. Her heart was unequivocally winter; at least, in terms of love.

                “Everyone, this is Y/N.” Tony announced, waving his hand over the gathered Avengers and bringing their attention to the stone-faced female next to him. “Y/N, this is everyone.” He finished, reversing the motion and gesturing to the rest of the team. “I’ll give you all a few minutes to exchange pleasantries before the briefing starts. The Star-Spangled Man is on his way with the plan.”

                The room was still as the team and Y/N regarded one another in silence. Just as the situation was on the brink of being awkward, Y/N sighed, breaking the silence.

                “Jeeze, tough crowd.” She joked, pulling out a chair at the table and sitting down. “You’d think I’d murdered someone or something.”

                “Have you?” Natasha asked as a small smile played on her lips.

                “Murdered someone?” Y/N asked, quirking a dark eyebrow.

                “Yes.” Nat answered. “Have you murdered someone?”

                “Only a little.” Y/N replied. “Hard to avoid it where I come from.”

                “And where is that?” Bucky asked, his interest now further peaked.

                “Clown College, obviously.” Y/N replied, a grin breaking across her mouth at her own joke.

                Before any actual elaboration could be given, Steve walked into the briefing room to announce the plan for their latest mission.

                “Everyone, this is Y/N.” He explained, unaware that Tony had already introduced the outsider to the team. “She’s on loan to Shield and is here to assist us with the mission.”

                “On loan from where?” Sam asked, shooting Y/N a look of suspicion.

                “Omaha.” Y/N supplied with another grin. “You know, where all the best clown colleges are.”

                “I don’t actually know.” Steve answered honestly. “All I know is that Fury and Carol dropped her off with the mission brief this morning. Said she would be instrumental in the success of our plans today.”

                Within an hour, two Quinjets were taking off from the Avengers compound. Steve, Tony, Clint, and Nat in the first jet; Sam, Bucky, Y/N, Scott (of all people), and a S.H.I.E.L.D. pilot in the second. Both Sam and Bucky were apprehensive about Y/N flying the jet until they were reminded that neither they, nor Scott, actually had their newly required liscense.

                “Honestly, I’m only flying for the window seat.” Y/N quipped as she guided the jet above the cloud cover.

                “What? You don’t want to knock around back here with us?” Sam challenged.

                “It’s not that I don’t appreciate the offer; really, it’s flattering, but we’ve only just met Kiwi.”

                “It’s Falcon.” Sam corrected, shooting Bucky a glare as the other man failed to stifle a chuckle. “Kiwi birds don’t fly.”

                “Technically, neither do you, mon ami.” Y/N pointed out. “But okay, Falcon.” She paused and then peered over her shoulder at Sam. “Does your mother call you Falcon? Or just Fal?” A smirk crossed her face again as she turned back to the expanse of sky before them.

                “My mother calls me Sam.”

                “So why am I calling you Falcon? Is this a sex thing?”

                Bucky and Scott exploded into fits of laughter as Sam became flustered in his explanation. Sam gave up after his first two attempts at an explanation being answered by Y/N’s ever-quirking brow and a lighthearted “Oh, really now?” and settled into his seat grumpily, where he stayed silent and annoyed the rest of the flight.

                Halfway to their destination, Y/N engaged the auto pilot, handed the controls over to the S.H.I.E.L.D agent, and stood from her seat; stretching her arms high above her head until a muffled pop emanated from her shoulders.

                “Oooh , yeah. That’s the stuff.” She groaned, rolling her shoulders back and sauntering to the back of the jet.

                “Stiff bones?” Scott asked, looking up from the word search he’d brought to keep himself occupied.

                Y/N paused and her eyebrow twitched like it was going to quirk upwards again before she just chuckled. “Honestly, that one is so easy, I’m just going to leave it alone.” She answered as she continued walking to the back of the jet.

                “Do you ever take anything seriously?” Bucky asked, staring her down.

                “Sure.” She returned his stare with equal intensity. “I take exactly three things seriously.”

                “And those are?”

                “Fighting, fucking, and espionage.” Y/N said, holding up a finger for each item. “Not necessarily in that order.”

                Bucky nearly choked on his own saliva and had to break eye contact with Y/N as the combination of her words and the intensity in her stare brought blood rushing both to his face and lower. He couldn’t deny that he found her physically attractive. She had a very ethereal quality to her that just wasn’t present back in his time. He had seen girls with a similar look to them around the city and on television, but it hadn’t really struck Bucky as something he might be into until today.

                “You’re crude.” He snapped, crossing his arms and resting his head on the hull of the jet. He did his best to come off as aloof and annoyed and must have done a convincing enough job because he caught the shadow of a wounded look behind the glare that Y/N sent his way before returning to the front of the jet. The remainder of the trip was silent save for the occasional radio chatter from Team One.

                “Look alive, boys. We’re down in ten.” Y/N announced. Her voice and body were all business as she once more exited the cockpit and made her way to the weapons rack. After arming herself, she opened the bay door and nodded to Sam and Scott, the latter of which had shrunk down and was clinging to Sam’s shoulder. “I’ll cover you guys.” She told him as he stepped towards the opening. “Go.”

                Sam nodded and dropped out of the jet before engaging his wings and disappearing into the dense cloud cover that hung around their target. He slipped past the enemy defenses unnoticed as the jet circled back around and waited for his signal to land.

                “East defense systems terminated. You’re good to go, Cap.” Tony’s voice sounded over the radio waves.

                “Team One on the ground.” The radio crackled to life after a minute with Steve’s voice.

                “Team Two, report?” Clint queried.

                “Standing by for the all clear.” Bucky answered.

                The channel was silent as Bucky and Y/N waited for Sam’s announcement.

                “It’s taking too long.” Y/N sighed in exasperation. “Something’s not right.”

                “Relax.” Bucky said, though his tone was just as on edge as hers. “This isn’t his first rodeo. Bird-Brain and Bug-Boy will come through.”

                As if on cue, or perhaps knowing Bucky had just called him Bird Brain, Sam’s voice came over the channel.

                “West defense offline. Someone fell off on the landing.”

                “It was a rough landing!” Scott whispered angrily into the communicator.

                “Take her down!” Y/N shouted up to the S.H.I.E.L.D. pilot.

                As soon as the jet touched the ground, Y/N and Bucky were out the bay door and gliding soundlessly through the darkened woods that surrounded the complex. Though he was on full alert and constantly checking his surroundings for any signs of the enemy, Bucky couldn’t help but to be impressed at Y/N’s sneaking skill. She matched him step for silent step in a way that suggested a very specific type of training. One that could only be given by the worst people imaginable. The type of people that produced very good spies and very efficient assassins. Bucky made a mental note to ask Y/N in private and see if his guess regarding her origin was correct or not.

                They crossed through the west gate of the complex and stepped around the bodies of dispatched guards. Patrol was oddly light for what was contained within the complex’s interior; a fact that did not go unnoticed by either Bucky or Y/N.

                “RoboCop.” Y/N whispered, holding her arm out to stop Bucky and pull him against the wall of the guard post. “Something is off. This patrol-”

                “It’s too light.” Bucky finished, ignoring the nickname. “You think it’s a trap?”

                “It is a trap.” She replied. “Either that or the cargo isn’t here.”

                “The Intel could be bad?” Bucky suggested, though he didn’t believe that for a second.

                “No. I told you, I take Espionage seriously.”

                The air around them suddenly exploded in heat and light and Bucky pulled Y/N to the ground, using his vibranuim arm to shield their faces from the blast.

                “Fall back!” Came Steve’s voice over the channel as the land erupted in gunfire and grenades. The blasts from Tony’s suit, as well as the cover fire from Sam and Clint lit up the sky, raging against the attacking enemies.

                “Come on!” Bucky barked, pulling Y/N back towards the woods. They made a mad dash across the open landscape, firing bullets and dodging return fire as they neared the trees. Right as they reached the tree line, the air around Bucky lit up in a shimmering violet light. He threw a look over his shoulder to see Y/N with her hands held up in the air, the violet light emanating from them, casting a protective shield that had stopped a bullet from entering Bucky’s skull. His attention turned towards Y/N and he watched in shock as she used one hand to shove the light into the ground and then jerked her now clenched fist upwards. The ground in front of them rose and piled itself nearly six feet high, creating a gap twice as long in front of it and providing both distance and cover from the enemy fire. As the earth settled, the light fell away from Y/N and her hand rose to her abdomen.

                “Ouch.” She muttered before collapsing to the ground.

                “Man down!” Bucky barked into his communicator as his shock disappeared and tactical response took its place. He rushed to Y/N and pulled her into the further cover of the darkened woods before doing a quick assessment on her injuries. There was a single bullet wound just between her bottom ribs. An errant enemy projectile that just happened to have caught her before she’d saved Bucky’s skull. Bucky slid his hand down her back and grimaced when he found her suit completely intact. No exit wound; she was bleeding and the bullet was lodged somewhere inside. “I need cover.” He spoke across the line.

                “I’ve got you.” Came Sam’s response seconds before RedWing appeared hovering over their heads.

                Bucky nodded his acknowledgement to the drone and then scooped Y/N into his arms before taking off through the woods back towards the jet.

                  They had managed to staunch the bleeding aboard the jet and stabilized her as best they could for the five hour return trip. Scott had ended up on the jet with Team One when they evacuated, which left plenty of room to lay Y/N down in the back.

                “What the hell was that?” Sam asked once they were safely in the air and out of range of enemy fire.

                “They knew we were coming. It was a trap.”

                “No, not the trap. I got the trap. I mean the purple shit.”

                “I…I don’t know. It came from her. She saved my neck…literally.”

#30 Days to I Do #breakmebucky #Bucky Barnes #nanowrimo #NaNoWriMo 2019 #bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #reader insert

[voibongg-blog]

Seriously what do you do in a long-distance relationship?

My boyfriend and I just celebrated our 2-year anniversary earlier this February. And during 24 months officially being a couple, we only spent 9 months with each other physically. Our relationship began when I was already in Finland finishing my freshman year, so it was natural that our relationship went this way. It was tough, really tough, but we have made it this far (wow… (seriously, wow)). I guess it is because we made up our minds already in the beginning so it was easier for us to accept the fact that this road was no flower road. Almost everyday since then, we call each other every evening. A lot of people wonder what we talk about everyday and how we do not get bored of those conversations. So in this blog, I am gonna give an answer to that by sharing some activities we do together in our long-distance relationship, and hopefully, I can help other long distance couples out there generate some ideas to spend time with your partner.

I tell him about my day and listen to his.

It sounds very simple and obvious, but this really matters. This is what we do everyday to show that we care for each other and we are not bored of it. When I tell him about my day, I tell him the interesting things happened during the day. I tend to notice the little stuffs that I find really amusing and I cannot wait to share with him at the end of the day. The story can be as simple as how slowly I walk and how I invented a game to entertain myself because it took me forever to get to the school. And he will tell me what he studied today and try to explain all Economics and Finance stuffs in my language so I am really excited to hear all about those. It is a balance between my afflatus stuffs and his knowledgeable stories that our conversations keep going on. But in the end, if you have strong feelings for someone, it does not matter (that much!!!) what that person is talking about, you just feel grateful that you have time for each other.

We found a lot of games to play with each other, and we are still searching for more!

Of course we do not spend all of our times talking about our day. As the relationship going, we found out some interesting games we could play together and it is just as fun, both online and offline! Okay, here it goes…

ONLINE GAMES

8 ball pool: This is a stable online platform for those who love playing pool, we connected to our Facebook accounts and challenged each other with many types of pool. We even created our own rules or bet on something (rather than fake coin they give us in the game) to make it more exciting.

Zynga Poker: Okay, we play poker together… But the funniest part is we play against the others in the table. We do not cheat, we only set a goal to win all the money in the table every game we play. It makes me feel like in old tales that the two of us against the world.

Scrabble: A more “intellectual” game than pool and poker. I introduced him to this game and now he is even more addicted to this game than I am. Basically, it is a word game and you play against each other or you can choose a random partner to defeat together.

Rummikub: This is also a brain-fucked game (sorry we are really into these stuffs). Basically you arrange numbers to win.

Battleship: We play in this link: http://en.battleship-game.org. It is an “ancient” game but everything gets better with bets, trust me

Go and Chinese Chess: Well it seems that we don’t fuck our brain enough with our education, we keep asking for more…

Loveball and Jellydoodle: Two more brain games, you cannot really interact with each other through these, but you can go through the challenges together (with two different phones at two different locations but yeah, still counts). It is just really nice to rack our brain together. True story!

Wordlink or Wordscapes: Words game, nothing much.

The Impossible Test, The Idiot Test, What’s in the box,…: Some other brain games if you’re interested. Cannot stress enough that we’re into these stuffs.

OFFLINE GAMES

Charades, pictionary, all those stuffs: thegamegal.com is a word generator platform for these kinds of games. There are different categories and different difficulty level for you to choose.

Whisper challenge: This is actually from Jimmy Fallon videos that we know about this game. One person mute the call, and say a sentence or sing a song, whilst the other one has to guess what is the sentence or what is the song while listening to some distracting music.

One-word song: Also from Jimmy Fallon channel. Basically you can only sing a song with one word, for example “goose”, so the whole song will go like “goose, goose goose goose, goose goose goooooooose….”. We use a song generator to random a song and thegamegal to choose the word.

5-second rule: This one is from Ellen’s channel. So my boyfriend will ask me to name three things in a categories and I need to answer it within 5 seconds. And then we switch. It is easy to find the questions by Google but we also make up our own categories like “3 things you will do when you see a penguin”. The more unique and creative the categories are, the more fun and unexpected the game gets.

Eat, befriend or fight: This is an interesting game from The Big Bang Theory. I will choose 3 animals like dinosaur, bear, and elephant; and then I will ask him to choose which animal he would rather eat, befriend or fight with. He needs to answer and give an explanation to that. We had quite a lot of fun with this game.

We also watch TV shows and movies together!

Instead of going to the cinema or sitting next to each other watching TV, we do it through Skype. We both turn on the episode we want to watch and then press play at the same time. We watched 10 seasons of “F.R.I.E.N.D.S”, 12 seasons of “The Big Bang Theory”, and 6 seasons of “Criminal Minds”. We choose series that are about 20-40 minutes long so we can watch it while we’re having meals (dinner for me and midnight snacks for him). If time allows, we would watch longer movies like “Our times”, some silly chick flicks (I choose of course) or mind-fucked movies (yeah you can tell). Recently, we do not have time to watch a long movie, so we switch to short videos from Ellen’s and Jimmy Fallon’s channels. It is soooo fun that I finally have someone to share all of these videos with. I used to watch these all alone and this really is amazing to me. Also, I watch NBA highlights with him because he’s crazy about basketball. I like basketball, not in a passionate way, but yeah I enjoy it. I never watch it all by myself, because I don’t know the teams, I don’t know who is who, and sometimes I don’t even know what just happens on the court. But it is really nice to watch basketball with him because he will not let me sit there like a potato but he will explain things to me, or give me some background information like who the tall black guy is and so on. I think we can share our interests  like this mostly because one person is willing to share and the other one is open to it and ready to find out more.

We take breaks from the fun and have deep talks too.

By deep talks I mean we talk seriously and truthfully in emotional, intellectual and spiritual aspects. It doesn’t have to be serious and stiff, we still laugh and joke along the way but we know the talk is real stuff. It can come very naturally in our conversation, one thing leads to another and we have the “deep talk”. They say that we cannot force a “deep talk” but turn out we can. We find some questions online, (they are available at thegamegal or you can use Pinterest and Google – there are plenty of them), and we take turn answer it and discuss our answers together. We understand each other much much better through this experience. I get to know his reaction and thoughts on certain situations and subjects. And through his explanation, I understand his reasons, his perspectives and clearly I could understand him better. It is really interesting how sometimes I think what I see is obvious but it turns out very differently in his thoughts.  These questions are mainly for the emotional and spiritual aspects, but it is really good to talk “intellectually” too. So when we come across some interesting topics that we both have knowledge and interests in, we discuss and sometimes, debate about that. Being in a relationship with a person means growing with them in all three dimensions. Therefore, it is important for me, and I believe for him also, that we have those talks. Also, it is really fun to prove someone wrong, so why not?

We plan something special for special occasions.

Surprise is my favorite element in life. And I’m talking about good surprise from my loved ones. I myself enjoy very much the process of planning and making presents for people I love, and distance doesn’t make it any harder. For example, on his 19th birthday, I prepared an Instagram account full with our pictures and stories to show him how much he means to me, and last birthday, I made him a playlist so that he can listen to that on the long bus to his university. We also called each other from a chicken restaurant to have a lunch date with each other – both dressed up! In return, he filled an empty USB with all the videos of himself singing and playing ukulele for me so that I could bring to Korea and listen to that when I was sad. He even wrote me a song on my birthday! There was one random day, it was after our first summer together and I already came back to Finland, he just went around in Hanoi taking pictures of places that were meaningful to us and sent them to me because “I suddenly miss you”. These special little things remind us why we do this in the first place, and show the other person that we care and we are also trying hard for our future.

These are basically everything we do during our 2 years of relationship. It has not always been fun and games and special things like I wrote above. Sometimes we just leave the Skype there and do our own work (and watch the other person do theirs) because we are too busy. But that is okay, because we know everything will turn out well for us as long as we still cherish each other everyday a little bit more and set some times to ask the other “How was your day?”

#long distance #long distant couple #ldr #ldr blog #nvdxcmh since05022017

[regressionuncensored]

Evie’s advice for feeling better! (submitted so I don’t send a bajillion asks)

I can’t make you feel better, but I can tell you how I got on the path to a better mental health!

First of all, in general, leave your judgement at the door. Both for yourself and my advice. Tumblr is infamous for responses to advice that consist of “what kind of neurotypical bullshit is this?” The thing is, saying that is ultimately proving my point that people on tumblr do not want to heal. Every bit of advice in those posts are valid.

The band-aid analogy:

It is so easy to wallow in self pity and receive cheap validation from people online, but in the end, it isn’t helping. Think about it like this: you fell on the playground and scraped up your knee really bad. In this analogy, scraping your knee will be the stand in for mental health. You have two options now. You can either let it sit there and fester and *maybe* eventually it will heal, but it will take longer, heal up all icky, and maybe even get infected. This is the equivalent of using tumblr and just letting your problems sit there and never do anything about it. Best case scenario, the problems will slowly fade away, but you never learned how to properly handle them and in the long run it only hurts you. If you don’t take care of your problems, you run the risk of them getting worse (like an infection), coming back again later (picking at a scab), or just letting them sit there forever and leave a big ugly scar that you could have prevented with hard work and perseverance.

How you actually need to care for an open wound like that is a long and boring process, but the results will show up faster and be much better in the long run. The first step is washing it off. This can be the equivalent of simply realizing there is a problem and deciding to take action. Then after that, you want to disinfect the wound. This is finding the source of your problems and removing it if at all possible. In my case, my parents are emotionally and physically abusive. How I ‘disinfect’ is I’m working really hard to move out on my own. But maybe not all of us have a way to get the icky nasty “germs” of our problems out of our lives right now, and that’s okay! It’s totally possible to heal if you don’t, it’s just a little bit harder. After that, you want to get some neosporin and a band-aid. These are your friends, families, therapists, your support group. These might help keep more icky stuff out of the wound, and can help reverse damage. After that, you need to remember to change the band-aid sometimes. This is the equivalent of seeing your therapist, talking to a friend or adult you trust, and making sure you keep lots of love around you so that the nastiness can’t get to you. Maybe sometimes you may even need to take medications to make extra sure you don’t get sick. This is totally ok!!! The medicine is always going to be to help you. It is just another layer of help for your scrape. Don’t demonize pills. They’re here to help too.

But wait, there’s more!

So you’ve started healing, but you still feel bad. That’s ok, it happens to the best of us. Here are 100% real and helpful tips to help feel better, tested and trusted by me!

Get active! I’m being serious. Being active gets your blood moving and makes your brain release happy juices that will make you feel better. Go for a jog, ride a bike, swim, play a sport, anything that gets you up and moving! You can always find something to do. And as a bonus, you might even lose a little weight. This can really help for people who don’t like how they look. I know it can be really really hard sometimes, but if you make yourself do it, you will feel better. Reward yourself if you have to! But you have to get up and get going, even if you really, really, really don’t want to. (It is okay if some days you just can’t. You just have to make sure that it doesn’t happen often. I give myself one “can’t do it” day a month, and most of the time now, I don’t even use them.)

Drink lots of water! Yes, I know soft drinks and juices are yummy, but they’re really not good for you in more ways than one. Your body needs normal water. That’s what makes it work. There is water in juices and soft drinks of course, but your body will take in normal water so much better. If you absolutely have to, they make sugar free water flavorings (Crystal light, for example) that come in lots of flavors and aren’t quite as bad. Start off with one whole 16 oz bottle of water a day, and build up over time. I drink between 2 and 3 bottles a day, and the recommended amount is 4 bottles. You can have juice and soft drinks sometimes, but it should be a rare treat! Milk is also good, but you have to drink water. Stay hydrated, and I promise you will feel a difference.

Hygiene! I know some days it feels so good to just lay in bed and do nothing, but you have to take care of yourself. Showers are my absolute best friend for my depression days. I even have a waterproof speaker that I take in the shower with me and play music on, and sometimes I even sing along, hairbrush microphone and all. You can even dance if you want to, but be careful and don’t slip. If all you can do is take a shower, be sure to wash your hair and body. If that’s all you can do today, that’s good! But you have to at least do that. I even recommend opting for a shower over a bath, since standing up means you have to use your muscles a little bit. Baths are for my good days, and usually I will take a bath with the most sparkly bath bomb I can find! The more you can do to take care of yourself, the better you will feel. My routine, for example, is to wash my hair, then my body, then shave, then do a sugar scrub, then shave again, then dry off and put on lotion. It’s a lot, but my legs feel soft and smooth and that makes me really really really happy! Sometimes I don’t make it all the way through my routine, but I go as far as I can. Of course, your routine is yours to make, but that one is mine.

Meditate. This one is good for any time you’re stressing out and also really good before bed to help sleep. Guided meditations are super easy to find for free online. Of you like ASMR, you can even just close your eyes and listen. I personally don’t like ASMR, so I listen to ambiance. They’re all over YouTube and have all kinds of themes like city noises, thunderstorms, the forest, the ocean, white noise, gentle music, and even some specific themed ones like riding in a horse-drawn carriage down a cobblestone road. I also really like gregorian chants.

Breathing exercises! Just like meditation, but faster and you can do it anywhere!

Stim toys! I shouldn’t have to explain this one.

Crying! Seriously, a nice long sob after a bad day releases all kinds of happy brain juices and it honestly just feels so good sometimes. It is 100% okay to cry.

Get offline! Read a book, put together a puzzle, color, just get away from a screen for a while.

There is all kinds of stuff you can do, but this is just a few examples of some of the ones I use. This is heavily geared towards depression/anxiety, since those are my biggest issues, but these are also the most common problems that people with mental illnesses have. Find things that are productive and make you feel better and suit your needs, but you absolutely have to keep going. Even when you really, really, really don’t want to. It is hard work, but it is so worth it and it gets easier. Just like fighting addiction, it gets easier with time. We’re all addicted to.our own misery, and that’s bad.

It also helps to avoid anything that might trigger you. However, if you do see it, don’t panic. Don’t talk about it, just take a deep breath and move on. Block the tag or blog if you have to. Ultimately, it is up to you to take care of that yourself.

This is just a short little list to get y'all started. If I help even one person, I’m happy. I love you all! ---------------------------------- -Lyra

#submission #evietherogue #advice

[enigmasoulsworld]

PG LIFE......(bad experience!!!)

My life was going soo good with all those online classes and exams online (cheating included) ;) but but but.. my almighty life has to show some fucking stunts!!! yup. suddenly my college send a notice to all students that campus is going to be completely offline and no more online benefits..ahhh!...and we have to reach there within 1 week. now the adventure started. now I’d to move to completely new city far from home, parents, and the shitty part “a PG life”.

OK. so I moved to a PG via my classmate , which later turned out to be a very bad decision. first of all classmate is sugarcoated bitch.. she fucking got commission for recommending me this pg... like seriously!!! I thought she was just being nice and was helping but was playing a salesgirl roll for them. secondly, its so expensive(including that bitch’s commission). I already paid a huge amount for 3 months in advance(according to their policy). now they were asking me to pay extra money as the signed agreement was for 3 months and 4 days. so now I have to pay for those extra 4 days.. WTF! 2 points- 1st who told you to make agreement with extra 4 days I didn’t. without my consent you made an agreement and now shamelessly and greedily asking for extra money.  2nd when I asked about the issue so altogether the warden, agent, head of department is arguing that contract has been made so I’d to pay money as contract once made cannot be changed and also threatened me that will stop my wi-fi connection and food. But poor them didn’t know who they messed with. I called the main head office of the whole business, before that I logically fought with the warden and funny part is he got kinda scared of me...;) and till today didn’t said a single word to me. but warden can’t do anything. so what I did was the thing i writing here I wrote this whole thing and experience on my social media accounts by tagging them in the post and spread it which eventually may decrease their goodwill among their customers. then nothing happened that day but the other day...  they sent an email informing that they CHANGED THE CONTRACT and now no extra money is required to be paid. NOW THIS IS THE POWER OF SOCIAL MEDIA. 

So guys through this experience of mine I want you to get certain things inside your pretty brains:

1- never trust a new, extra sweet friend..

2- never get cared of these people. their is always a system behind to help you i.e. social media. VERY POWERFUL. can bring anyone down.

3- such kind of experiences makes you ready and stronger for this cruel mean world, so embrace and fight them... :)

                                                                          Your well-wisher

                                                                        - SHIVANGI BHARDWAJ

[dwestfieldblog]

THE ORGANISED WAR CRIMES OF ADOLF PUTIN

Remember this statement just before it all started? ‘The West has been destroyed without a shot fired.’ ‘There are no plans to invade’. Hmm.

News coming too fast to keep up, first off, sweet of Putin to send ‘peacekeepers’ (sic) into East Ukraine because the little darlings begged for help from the democratic monsters in Kjev. Does anyone other than a handful of grandmothers in St Petersburg really believe that with hundreds of thousands of soldiers (75 per cent of the entire army according to western sources) surrounding, that Kejv gave the order to fire a rocket at a kindergarten, or send ‘terrorists’ to attack Putins boys? The gremlin in the Kremlin plans a ‘denazification’of Ukraine. Thus ranted a man with small shoes while acting just like Adolf, invading an independent sovereign neighbour and murdering wholesale.  The world cuts off Russia from SWIFT banking system...which Mafia Vlad said would be taken as an act of war and in accordance, has readied the nuclear option to the highest level. The New Cold War close to white heat.

Shelling a nuclear plant is another step way over the borders of sanity. Sic simper tyrannis, we can only hope.

‘Facism is a system of government led by a dictator who typically rules by forcefully and often violently suppressing opposition and criticism, controlling all industry and commerce and promoting nationalism and often racism.’ How many boxes does Vladimir the Denazifier tick? So, Social Fascism (believing that social democracy stands in the way of a dictatorship of the proletariat beloved by Stalin but never allowed) is acceptable as opposed to National Socialism which appears to have everything in common. In other words, only Putin is allowed to be a Nazi Fyurer. Still, it is a very useful word to trigger a strong motherland response.. Zelensky is a brave hero, the type of president other types can only fantasise about being.

Putin was a taxi driver in the early nineties, nice he has a second job to fall back on when he is removed with prejudice from office. If he is allowed to stay alive. The problem wouldn’t end there... Medvedev, the former puppet PM/President/ whatever, recently tweeted after the start of war and sanctions that with the West ‘there is no particular need in maintaining diplomatic relations...we may look at each other in binoculars and gun sights’. So unless he is only posturing to remain in the bad boys club, he will have to go too. Siberian exile away from his more than a billion hectares of land. Leave them both for the wolves between the birch trees. And the very dodgy Sergei Shoigu.

Was reading the foul comments from the now offline Russia Today.  Hundreds of unlikely names from Western countries, writing in dubious un-English. The comments on almost every news item follow an endless pattern of slagging off the old guy in the White House, Soros, Zionists behind it all/ ‘little evil rat of a nation of money changers’ etc etc. Troll statements against black people...all in all, those who write so charmingly seem to be a blend of racists who would be ecstatic for useful idiot Trump’s return because they hate America and know he will hasten its end. Much as Boris Johnson has been doing for the UK.

Liked the comment that ‘Brits are insufferable and always have been’ If I were Scottish, Irish or working class English, furious offence would be taken at that. You foreign dogs, it is only the upper and middle class English who are insufferable, get it right. Arf. My favourite comment (but only because I ran out of a sense of humour after fifteen minutes and had to stop reading the poison) was; ‘The US funded the UN and they are both member (sic) of the gang. They were led by transgenders from CIA.’ Well, J Edgar of the FBI might have been a little bit queer but guys, who hasn’t dressed in female clothing at least once eh? Hahahahahah...ah that’s better, was starting to take life seriously.

Further proof of the worsening retardation of Donald Trump’s alleged brain continues with his first statement on Putin’s invited invasion. ‘This is genius... oh that’s wonderful, how smart is that?’ Fascinating that the very ones who follow him most, used to be the types who would declare such talk as commie sympathising and punch the guy out. Of course as the situation worsened, and many Republican supporters failed to agree with him, the sick peroxide one attempted to walk back his brown nosing even as he hinted again at running in 2024. Trump gets a button mushroom hard on for abuses of power, so very clearly he is a psychotic sado-maschochist into water sports.

Now...what about that 8 million dollar donation by Putin to the Brexit campaign to sway the results and get the five million Brits living in the EU to have their votes not be counted? Come on MI6, release the facts... (Seems unlikely while the current government are trying to cover up the oligarch money they received to booster their party. Perhaps after the next election.) Worst case scenario (if no nuclear war before then) is Boris, Trump, Xi and Putin still in power in 2024. Nice to see the ECJ quite reasonably ruling that in order for Hungary and Poland get their hands on the European treasure trove of handouts, that they must follow the written values to which they all agreed. Hard to do in Polsko, where the (bad) Law and (no) Justice Party have recently stated that ‘Gay rights is an ideology worse than communism...a foreign ideology’. All together now; NO, it isn’t you ridiculous people. Homosexuality verses Stalin, Pol Pot, Mao Zedong, and appalling student poetry? No contest. Good forgiving God fearing Christians with a firm grasp of realties. When Hungary and Poland reinstate the judges who followed the actual law and media outlets reporting the actual news as opposed to their government’s ideas AND allow women the right to choose over abortion etc etc etc, then they can suck at the teat.

Of course this could be yet another scale tipping in favour of the East’s propaganda against the lame duck West and both will be encouraged to leave the EU to bring the house of cards down. That said, I am very Very happily surprised that Hungary and Poland (and Turkey and even China) are firmly against Mad Vlad’s actions in Ukraine. Was not expecting them to all come out. Possibly this war will have the effect of uniting the previously steadily fragmenting unions around the world against a certain despotic mindset.

And now for some light entertainment...Just before the war, Prince Andrew settled financially with the fragrant Virginia...12 million pounds. Hmm, if there was really a genuine assault, why would anyone just take the money? Unless they are a w***e.. And if he was willing to pay (well, he won’t, his mum/ taxpayer and fading mates will) such a vast amount for something he didn’t do and to avoid going to court...how much dangerous dirt does he know of?  

Speaking of friends with the former Mr Epstein, Trump has set up his very only online platform for the excrement which Twitter, you tube and facebook (oops, sorry, Meta, arf) wouldn’t allow him to. In a criminal abuse of the word, he has called it Truth. Very hard to avoid a triple hernia while laughing so hard I almost vomited and evacuated my bowels at the same time. And they say men can’t multitask. In the interests of fake investigative journalism, I will use almighty Google to find whose money financed this putrid cadaver of an idea. (Truth Social...1.4 billion investment for disinformation in the name of freedom. Come on down, the definitely legal and not dodgy Patrick Orlando...)

Anyway, away from the war for another paragraph...There used to be a foul and ridiculous dj in the 60s-80s called Jimmy, he had lots of friends in the upper echelons of British society (including Mrs Thatcher) and was made a knight for services performed to charity and helping kids to fix their dreams. Seems he took decades of evil advantage of orphans, cripples, corpses and fans of all ages but mostly the underage. During his lifetime, Sir Jimmy’s name was whispered with bile but no charges were ever brought, most likely due to victim’s deep shame, witnesses’ fear of being called a liar and losing their jobs... and his protection from the establishment. He died without ever truly facing the public.

Another knight of the realm, the leader of the current opposition in the UK worked as a chief prosecutor before becoming a politician. A few weeks ago, he stood up in the House of Commons to reprimand Boris once again for his dire untruths and prevarication over the parties held in Downing Street environs during Lockdown. Sir Kier advised the PM that his lies and memory lapses wouldn’t wash with the Metropolitan police. The blonde liar rose red faced and blamed the Labour leader for being guilty of not having charged Sir Jimmy for his disgusting sins (a deceit provable by facts but enjoyed by the right wing cult minds) . The next day, Sir Kier was attacked by various cretins from Alpha Men asses who chose to believe an endless scum sucking liar from a government they hate. Piers Corbyn put the video of the attempted assault on his pages online. (Stop me if I have any of the actual facts wrong.)

THIS is the leader of Britain. A man who would strike back at a provable truth with a genuinely despicable lie. A man who will use any excuse to stay in power, any amount of ‘dead cats’ thrown on tables to distract the audience from his corrupted heart. A prime  minister who deliberately goes on live TV to speak in all earnest seriousness like an adult while looking like a fat eight year old boy after a rough and tumble. (As he dared to do after the war started. Damn sure he is happy for his Churchill moment now, so his endlessly shameful list of failures can be forgotten.) Meanwhile...

Putin warned of ‘Genocide’ in Donestk, the perfect false flag to justify a minor incursion of a few hundred tanks to protect his citizens (those with the passports he handed out so quickly). He must have got impatient to seize more of the means of production to support the country he allowed his criminal friends to bankrupt. Tsar Vladimir, like the revolution never happened. Your place in history is secure pal, but possibly nobody will be alive to read it.

West and East almost talking of diplomacy while ratchetting up the rhetoric and piling on the propaganda and spewing spurious information... various billionaire criminals on both sides must have decided that weapons won’t sell themselves en masse and they need to top up their accounts to make up the shortfall caused by covid...wargasms for the greedy rich and the bored. Well boys, haters of capitalism on one side (although enjoying the fruits of others labour) and despisers of the Eastern despotic mindset, remember it is a mistake to kill too many of your customers and mess up the flow of trade routes.

Which might well be the only reason China objected to the invasion and threat of nuclear warheads being used in Europe and the US. If the West is destroyed, China is finished, who else will it sell its crap to? India alone won’t cut it. (SHAME on the world’s largest democracy for not condemning the invasion. A very cosmic AUM to you Mr Modi. Shanti? Go eat a cow.)

A couple of months ago, Putin and Xi actually recently put in writing that they agreed to oppose the ‘abuse of democratic values and interference in the internal affairs of sovereign states under the pretext of protecting democracy and human rights, and any attempt to incite divisions and confrontation with the world’. They also called on the international community ‘to respect cultures and civilisational diversity’ and ‘the rights of peoples of different countries to self-determination’. All together again...’YEAH, RIGHT’.

My dark passenger has a list of those who really need to wake up on a table surrounded by plastic sheeting. Yes, I have been watching Dexter...On a lighter note...seems very possible that at least some of Q Onan’s ideas were stolen from a deeply satirical and funny book created by several free thinking libertarian anarchists, the sublime Principia Discordia...or as RAW would say they are all truly full of their Self Hypnotical Idiational Trance. For any rednecks reading, that there’s an ac-ro-nym. Some  gloriously black humour that a work which extracts the urine from various idiots and conspiracy theorists has been taken by the same types as gospelJ Except that they are using the ideas to justify violence. Reminds me of Richard Bach’s warnings of the ‘Pagite Wars’ in One. Kids, perhaps it is better to read The Book of Lies by Aleister Crowley before The Bible. Good luck.

Don’t worry; realities are just a bunch of little dots. The dots appear to move in expected order according to the Will of the focused watcher. They also seem to move according to the random thoughts of millions, just far less organised.

LOVE BEYOND BLOOD.