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ethanharli · 3 years

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Resentment: Jujutsu Kaisen x Male Reader

[Ch.1|Episode One]

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“Ngh” A small groan slipped past my parted lips as I rubbed the scar on my neck, feeling it itch and burn as I tried not to scratch at it. “Does it still hurt?” My gaze flicked down towards Itadori, his sudden presence not much of a shock to me since him popping up out of no where is a regular occurrence to me. Yet the slight worry in his eyes caused a small smirk to tug at my lips as he rested his hand on my shoulder, “Jus’ itches, nothin’ more than that.” My voice came out low and gruff, with a bit of strain, something I still haven't gotten used to after I had damaged my vocal cords years ago. However Itadori just smiled and patted my shoulder, “Don’t forget to take care of it okay? I don’t wanna keep slapping your hands if you try to scratch at it” I couldn’t help but laugh along with him at the memories.

“Ah- Yuji I forgot to mention that I wont be able to come with you to visit your grandpa, I promised I’d stay with Sasaki and Iguchi after school today” I couldn’t help but frown at the slight waver in his smile, and the hint of disappointment in his eyes. I’d always go with him to see his grandpa, as emotional support and for the fact that his grandpa and I always had a father-son like relationship, but I couldn’t tell my classmates no when they looked at me with such excitement about the surprise they had for me. “It’s alright, I’ll tell him you said Hi!” His smile seemed a bit fake at this point, and in hopes to make him feel a bit better I rested my hand on his head, ruffling up his hair like I used to do when we were younger. “I’ll see you tomorrow then, but you really should go, it looks like coach is waiting for you?” I spoke awkwardly, finally noticing the coaches piercing gaze behind us.

“Oh yeah! I’ll see you later then!” Itadori turned to leave, but before he could I gently took ahold of his wrist, catching his attention with slightly widened eyes. “Remember, I’m always a call away if you need me” I smiled softly, finally letting go of his wrist as he stared at me for a moment, before breaking into a wide grin with a happier aura now surrounding him. “I know, but be careful okay? I’ll see you tomorrow!” I merely nodded and waved as he ran off alongside the coach, knowing exactly how that was going to end. Yet, before I could take another step a familiar disgusting stench made its way to my nose, along with some unsettling memories that I quickly pushed back down.

“What the hell was that..?” I couldn’t help but mumble it out, my hand instinctively moving toward the scar on my neck, the raised flesh once again started to itch and burn, irritating me to no end. Taking a deep breath I stuffed my hands in my pockets and headed towards the occult clubroom, deciding I’ll just wait out in there until Sasaki and Iguchi got back.

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An hour or two passed since I got to the clubroom, and since I already cleaned the room when I first arrived I decided to lean back in one of the chairs and read the books we have in here, actually finding most of them quiet interesting. However I nearly doubled over at the familiar scent that I had smelled earlier as a prickly feeling danced over my skin, sending an unpleasant shiver up my spine. My ears immediately perking up at the sound of footsteps approaching the clubroom. Something felt off, and as it got closer I couldn’t help the small growl that reverberated throughout my chest, the sudden alarm of my flight or fight responses kicking in as the door slid open, revealing Sasaki and Iguchi. The familiar faces not doing anything to help calm my nerves as I glared at the object in Sasaki’s hand.

“What’s that?” I didn’t hesitate to voice my thoughts, my tone now surprisingly harsh as I continued to glare at the medium sized object. My fellow second years looked at me in shock before a wide grin spread across Sasaki’s face, “Itadori grabbed it for us! it’s supposed to contain an evil spirit” Even though she spoke with a carefree tone I couldn’t help but tense up when she held it up to me, the alarms in my head continuing to rattle my core as I got a better view of it.

That’s.. a special grade object.

“I don’t think that's a good idea, what if something goes wrong and someone gets hurt?” I tried to be a voice of reason, hopping she’d put the damn thing away, or at least hand it over so I can get rid of it. It didn’t help that my hands were practically trembling under the desk as I glared at the object with unease as she pulled up a chair and sat in front of me. “Simple! Nothing will happen, and if something does happen then we got you here Mr. Underground boxer” Her teasing smirk caused my unease to settle for a moment, and the mention of my old hobby causing a blush to spread across my cheeks. However she’s as stubborn as a mule, so if I can’t convince her not to open it then I’ll at least be here when it happens, “Fine, lets get to it before I change my mind.”

So for the next ten minutes we moved the desks around and turned off the lights as I took a seat besides Sasaki, watching carefully as she slowly unwrapped the talisman, keeping my guard up until finally the talisman came off, “A finger?” I mumbled softly, looking closely at the decayed limb. Until finally it clicked, “Move!” My nose twitched at the new scent approaching and reaching behind me I grabbed my chair and threw it up at the curse above us, grabbing both Sasaki’s and Iguchi’s wrists to force them out the room. ”Run!” I growled out, a small hiss slipping past my lips as I slammed the sliding door shut, feeling the hands of the curse crash into it behind me. ”And I thought I was finally done with this shit-” Taking a deep breath I pushed against the door and sprinted down the hallway, searching for my classmates.

I have to find Sasaki and get that finger from her, at least that way I know she won’t be the main target. With that in mind I tried tapping back into my own curse as I ran down the halls, but every time was a failed attempt. I stopped when I heard a high-pitched scream, I wasted no time bolting towards the sound, Sasaki and Iguchi both coming into view, however my blood nearly ran cold at the sight of the curse on their trail, it’s hands reaching out towards them, successfully grabbing Iguchi, “Fuck!” In an desperate act I ran towards Sasaki, a light green glow surrounding my body as I managed to make it to her in time, pushing her out the way as the hand that tried to grab her got to me instead, slamming my body into the wall besides me. The air got knocked out of my lungs from the impact, black spots slowly clouding my vision as my teeth gritted in pain.

“Run..” I managed to mumble out, the curse dragging me back into its body as fatigue slowly weighed me down. In the blur of my vision I caught a glimpse of someone new standing before the curse, a sigh slipped past my lips as I used the last bit of my energy to reach for Iguchi, the faint green glow returning to my body as I grabbed Iguchi’s arm, the flow of my cursed energy managed to make the curse shy away from my body a bit as I yanked Iguchi out of its body and threw him onto the titled floor. The shattering of glass and a familiar blur of pink hair being the last thing I saw before it all went black.

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The cool air nipped at my skin as I shifted a bit, a groggy groan slipping past my lips as my eyes fluttered open, being met with a familiar plain, cream colored ceiling. “Y’know it was a surprise to see you there,” Almost instantly I bolted up, the familiar voice causing my eyes to narrow as I glared at the masked male, a smirk playing at his lips as he leaned back in the hospital hair. “It’s good to see you again, wild child” The old name caused my nose to twitch in irritation, a few strands of my [H/c] hair falling in front of my eyes, as a dull ache started to appear in my lower back, “Wish I could say the same.. Satoru.” His presence unsettled me for the simple fact that I knew my finally normal life would go back downhill once again, yet I can’t deny that seeing him again made me a little bit happy.

Like hell I’d tell him that though, his ego’s already to big.

“Wait, what happened after I passed out?” I asked, remembering all the events until after that moment, however I didn’t like the amusement in his smile as he leaned forward, slowly beginning to explain the situation to me. The image of Itadori eating Sukuna’s finger made me wince in disgust, but it felt like my whole world came to a stop at the mention of his future execution. Anger slowly bubbled up within my chest but I made sure to bite it back down as I glared at my fists, “The higher ups are nothing more than pathetic little insects.. I hate them, all of them.” I couldn’t help but grit my teeth, my fists slowly beginning to tremble as a low growl slipped past my lips. “Then come back to Jujutsu tech, you’ve been gone for about six years now, if they hear about your return it’ll cause an uproar.”

Before I could answer him the door opened, revealing Itadori, and I couldn’t help but jump out of the bed and make my way towards him, startling him slightly, “[Y/n]! You’re Okay-!” He tensed in my arms as I engulfed him in a hug, my fingers desperately gripping onto the back of his shirt as I hid my face in the crook of his neck. Not caring that Gojo was watching in amusement behind me, or the fact my body still felt so heavy after what happened. The felling of his arms finally wrapping around my waist catching me off guard, but I didn’t make any act to move as everything I learned slowly came to mind. A small sigh slipped past my lips as I pulled away, looking at Itadori’s face for a moment, noticing the new marking under his eyes, that must’ve appeared after eating Sukuna’s finger.

“I’m glad you’re okay” It was all I could mumble out in the moment, the pit in my stomach growing at the thought of the higher ups executing him someday. “I should be the one saying that, you’re the one in the hospital” He laughed and I couldn’t help but laugh along with him, “Touché.”

Taking a step back I turned towards Gojo, my eyes narrowing in determination, “I’ll go back.”

And I’ll protect him too.

#x male reader #jujutsu kaisen x male reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #itadori yuji x male reader #itadori yuji x reader #fushiguro megumi x reader #fushiguro megumi x male reader #itadori yuji x top male reader #fushiguro megumi x top male reader #Resentment; JJK

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terrence-silver · 2 years

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Can I make a request of terry silver and the reader having a praise kink? I haven't seen it done before so I would love to see how Terry would be in that situation. Love your work! :)

Sometimes, he liked to be told he was good.

Terry liked to be told he was good.

That he has done good.

Perhaps, because it so seldom happened. Perhaps, it was merely human nature? In fact, he didn't recall when was the last time someone told him he was good. Truly good. Maybe, not since his own parents. Maybe not even they ever called him good, treating each complement like it cost actual money to utter, at times. You say, 'I love you, son', and the virtual bank account goes cha-ching! Later in life, it was always critique and infamy and padded news articles giving him bought-off, fake praise with commissioned publicity his people went through with a fine comb. Even when Terry did a bad thing and he did a great many, he'd act willfully gleeful about it. He'd laugh at his own misdeeds. The corruption. The bribery. The lies. The cruelty. The moral debauchery. He'd have fun with it, like a child has fun with it's favourite toys, always thinking of new ways to play his little games. New ways to arrange the plastic soldiers. The rubber snakes. The tiny cars. His figurative train-set. And then you had to go and say it, in the most mundane of fashions. -"Thank you, Terry. You're too kind."- He didn't even really remember what the context was, or what the situation entailed. He might've acted the gentleman and handed you the salt shaker off of the elaborate, colossal mansion dining table, for all he knew. You went and thanked him.

Furthermore, you went and thanked him like that.

Thank you, Terry, you're too kind.

Him? Too kind?

What a riot.

But, yeah --- yeah, he was good. Why wouldn’t he be good?

There was nothing the matter with him. Terry was good. You said so yourself.

He ponders those words for weeks and weeks and for all his elaborate desire to get ahold of himself and get back in control, he simply cannot and he rewinds it in his head, time and time again, to the point of obsessiveness and distraction, until he corners and confronts you on one occasion, demanding to be praised. Practically ordering you to. Praised about anything. Praised often. Not just in bed, while he was inside of you, in the spur of the moment, heated, while he was coiling his fingers around your neck, spitting in your mouth, subjugating you and making you his, but always, in general, any time, any place --- thinking back to his old Captain Turner in 'Nam and how he never praised him either. Terry never heard the words 'Well done, soldier! At ease!' out of him. Terry never heard the words 'You've gotten stronger! You filled your scrawniness out.' out of his friends. Only out of John did Terry ever hear an amicable word and he felt starved for throughout an entire lifetime --- and now there was you. Patting his cheek, as instructed, telling him how beautiful he was. Of course, he already knew that. Terry was plenty self aware of his qualities. Some would even say he was downright arrogant, but fuck those pricks. He simply needed to hear it. Time and time and time again. Until he was sated. So what if he was a narcissist?

He wanted your fuel until that frightful hollow in his chest no longer ached.

-"You're so handsome. And good. And sweet."-

You begin, warmly, cupping his face. Hah! There you go with the 'good' again.

Felt like a blatant misrepresentation but he adored it. It felt so divine.

You weren't the lying type. You simply loved him.

That's why it was so addictive to hear you say these things.

-"Good. What else?"-

He presses on. He has been, for a couple of hours now.

Terry wants to test just when you'll run out of positive things to say to him.

He hope it would be never at all, and that he could wind you up;

Like a personal robot animatronic here to sing him praises.

-"Tall. Strong. Intelligent. Well-spoken."-

-"Go ahead. I didn't give you permission to stop. More."-

-"I feel so safe around you, Terry. You're so lovely towards me."-

-"M o r e."-

-"You're resourceful and talented and skilled."-

-"What else?"-

-"You've the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen."-

-"More."-

Terry demands, verbally holding you hostage. He intends for you to do this always.

#i'll do you one better anon #terry enjoying some praise himself #terry silver #terry silver x reader #anon ask #kk3 #cobra kai

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leahseclipse · 3 years

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The Reichenbach Fall: Aftermath - Chapter Two: So, What Did We Miss?

Series Masterlist

Pairing: Sherlock Holmes x GN!Reader (With some Fem mentions)

Warnings: S2 FINALE SHERLOCK SPOILERS, Major character death; death topic, mourning, suicide mentions, depression mentions., terrorist attack brief mention (lemme know if I missed stuff.)

Summary: Now that Sherlock is back, explanations are due.

Word Count: 4.6K

A/N: Here's chapter two! As always- if you prefer AO3, click here :)

The weather had even gotten better, as if it only rained to have a full dramatic effect, there was only wind, which didn’t seem to announce a storm, for now. The sound of the leaves being crushed by my feet as I walked was to be heard, as no other sounds were around, it was very quiet today.

The silence did feel weird, I never liked it.

Not when it caused me to think of…

“Got time to spare for me?”

...him.

“Sherlock.”

“I’m not quite into this, usually- but in movies, the scene usually goes like; they stare, probably cry a bit, and run down in each other’s arms. But...the ‘stare part’ is a bit long, is it normal?” Sherlock asked.

“I would like to remind you that you were dead for two years. Hell, you’re still supposed to be dead, I just talked to a grave for the past hour, doing as if you could hear me from wherever!”

“I don’t think it works like tha- oh, imagination.” Sherlock acknowledged, raising his index. “Forgot, sorry.”

“What do you think I’ve been doing if ‘imagining’ doesn’t exist?”

“Being crazy?” He asked. “Sorry, first thought. Doesn’t mean you...actually are, you’re not crazy. Quite the clever kind actually, a tad smarter than-”

“I didn’t ask to be...praised. We’re kind of in the middle of an argument, and also in a cemetery. Which I realize now, and I doubt the dead people here would like to hear us yelling.”

“Probably.” He agreed, as he frowned.

He’s thinking.

“Can I just ask a small favor? I know that’s quite rare for me to do that, but I’m doing that because it’s you.”

“If that’s asking to keep the secret about you not-being-dead-anymore, I don’t know.”

“This could be this too, but it’s not.” He tilted his head, briefly looking down. “Promise not to kill me in the car? It’s just that, dying in a car, and ‘dying’ again would be quite an unfortunate way to decease, if you…”

“...fine. But I can’t promise I will keep that...promise, once we’re somewhere not outside.”

“That’s...fair, I guess. Thank you for...half respecting-” He stopped in his sentence as I gave him the start of a death stare. “...respecting my favor. Sorry, stutter.”

“That’s better...I guess.” I repeated, hearing a small hum from him as we started to walk out the sinister place.

I didn’t even get myself at this moment. Even though he was there, as I wished, it still hurt. He was here, right in front of me, so wasn’t it fine?

“Why do you have dried blood and bruises on your face though?”

“...John hit me.”

“John did?”

“He...did.”

Well that’s new.

“Guess you said something bad to upset him, I never thought he’d ever punch you, you guys are like kindergarten buddies’.”

Sherlock chuckled. “He had a good reason, though. I faked being dead, let him mourn, miss me. I’m even surprised you haven't done that...yet.” He said, looking at me.

“Don’t tempt me.”

“Right. Got it, no...tempting.” He nodded, turning his head back in front of him.

Sherlock’s lucky I have an ounce of good in me. I would have given him more than a punch considering what he did. If he wasn’t the famous, amazing detective, and my...friend-crush, he’d be dead and put in the grave he was supposed to be in all that time.

Speaking of that, I wonder if they just left it empty, or if someone was actually there all the time. I hope it’s empty, though. It would creep me out to find out I’ve been threatening an innocent person- considering they didn’t put some random criminal in there.

At least, the positive point of all this is that he won’t have to pay for another grave, which is...a good deal, for a guy like him.

I hope he has a good explanation for this, it’d be a shame to bury him again.

As I opened the front door of the apartment- Sherlock stepping behind me, I walked towards the blinds, pulling them open to let light in. I turned towards him, looking around the room.

“Yeah, by the way, I cleaned the place.” I pointed out. “Everyday. I know you never wanted anyone to touch it, do anything at all, but I did. I guess that was me hoping you’d come back, and I realize that I...kinda hurt myself by coming back here, hoping you’d be in there, or come through the door any second, but you didn’t, for two years. And even if two years seemed enough to realize that you were really dead- I, and probably others, hoped for a miracle. We didn’t stop at all.”

“I do realize I will never be sorry enough, because no amount of apologies would ever make up for two years, or even a month, or a week.” He listed. “I left you, I acknowledge it. But, even if my next words might anger you more...I did it so you wouldn’t be the ones that’d end up dead. Even if I didn’t die, I did make the person after me believe that, I think. And, don’t hit me for that either- but I’d do it again if a great risk was to put you all in danger. Even you. I know that I haven’t been the nicest, which made you believe you were just a girl working with me, but you’re like everyone I’m always with- a friend, that I also consider family, and you still are, you’ll ever be, if building back our relationship happens to take time.” He admitted.

“I don’t even know what I feel about you...about your death, and you...being here, after a whole lot of time. I mean- we all felt your death deep inside us, it wasn’t just ‘wow, we’ve been real sad , but now we can move on and be better, just as no important person if our life didn’t just die!’, you really couldn’t have...let us know without letting anyone know that we knew?”

“You know I would have if I could have!” Sherlock yelled. “I tried to think this through, and this seemed like the only way to solve this without damage. For you guys, mostly.”

“Oh, so, letting John witness his best friend committing suicide, letting him see his body on the bloodied pavement, his head kinda blown out, literally his friend being dead- was ‘without damage’ to you?”

“It seemed like, at the moment.”

“Well guess what, it wasn’t!” I exclaimed loudly.

“Gosh, try to understand, I don’t know, do as if you were a stranger, I don’t know! If a psychopath threatened to kill you, and your friends, or kill your friends to throw the blame on you, what would you do? Because someone would have known if I ever told it. And they would have killed you, all.”

“I could have done it. You know it wouldn’t have been as bad as it was with you, if it had been me.”

“Please don’t say that.” He plastered a saddened look on his face. “You couldn’t have done it instead. No one else could.”

“I could have, if you had let me. You didn’t deserve this.”

“Neither did you.” Sherlock quietly said.

The both of us glanced at the other, not one word coming out of someone’s mouth. Neither of us knew what to do.

He let out a breath, walking to the window, next to me. “...you’re making it feel like you’re not important.”

“That’s because no one is as important as you.”

“That’s not true. You are.”

“You know it wouldn’t have caused this much chaos with me. We needed you more, you weren’t some stupid detective, you were the most qualified, hell, everyone needed you. Lestrade didn’t need us as much as he needed you.”

“He did need you. you know that. You two were qualified enough to function without me. Don’t act as if you’re not smart, please.” He pleaded. “It was mine to deal with, this was between Moriarty...other people...and me, so not even some kind of FBI agent training for 40 years could have done it, or you, or John.” He explained. “I even had to plan how I’d die, how I’d set it up, how I’d hide, not let my presence slip out- I’m not saying you’re imcompetent, but all of this was mine to handle. I wouldn’t have been able to let anyone carry that. And if I had really died, that would have been fine either, because I would have died protecting the ones that mattered.”

“We would have still felt guilty. There’s always heavy consequences in that kind of event. We all searched what went wrong, if we missed anything leading to that, if we let an important detail slip that caused you to do that, or anything else that could have been blamed upon us. We all thought that was our fault.”

“I know. I thought of that. I do regret it, but I had to...jump off that building. If they wouldn’t have seen me die, they would have killed you all. And the same goes for the actual situation now. If they had seen me dead earlier, they would have killed you too.” Sherlock said. “Look, I wish I could have given up being dead and contacted you in some way, but I had to stay hidden until I could come back without risk, without you getting killed.” He specified. “I would have been the one filled with guilt if I risked your lives.”

“You wouldn’t have deserved to die. You still don’t” I quietly said, resting against the wall. “Do you even know how important you are to us? You’re more than a guy we work with.”

“...and I’m grateful for that. But all I’m asking you is to let me explain what happened; see it as a way to show how much you matter to me, okay?”

“Okay.”

“Moriarty wanted me to die. He summoned me to the rooftop, and...after I found an ‘arrangement’, he killed himself first, leaving me to be the only choice to save my friends . So, I had to jump as I was being watched, and if I hadn’t jumped, they would have killed Lestrade, John, Mrs.Hudson...and you.” He insisted on the last word, looking at me. “So this was better, what was supposed to happen, and the two years weren’t planned. I came back because there probably was...a literal terrorist attack.”

My eyes widened. “What? Aren’t you supposed to…”

“It’s being handled, forget it. It was probably a false alarm”

“We were on the road, Sherlock.”

“It’s far from here.”

“Why aren’t we there, though?”

“Day-off. I’m technically still dead.”

“Not really if people saw you. Plus, I doubt it’s a false alarm if it’s bad enough for you to come back.”

“Other people are handling it. Look, are you worried about them? I’ll send a text right in front of you.” He took his phone out, typing a few characters before hitting the ‘send’ button. “Just wait.” He looked to his right, as his phone emited a sound. “There…”we’re still alive.”

“Better, yeah.” I nodded. “...two years was really long, though. I started to believe you had really died, so I guess it worked.” I exclaimed with a shaky voice.

“Glad to know my plan turned out to be successful. Thanks for giving your review.”

“Quite rare of you to be polite. I do suppose you say ‘please’, and ‘thanks’, but I think you forget to say them out loud.”

“Sometimes, yeah. But I do think of them.” He confessed.

“Hm. But...what led Moriarty to do all of this? I’m not quite sure I have all the details.”

“Oh, that. It began a while ago, before you fully worked with me. The criminal network he was headed for was vast, he was practically everywhere, like a ‘cancer’, so we came up with a plan. Mycroft had...fed him information about me, and in turn he gave us hints, as to the extent of his web.” He explained. “And as you know, we let him go, so he’d acknowledge having the upper hand, which led him to destroy my reputation. But...I had to let him believe he had ‘won’, so he could reveal himself, in a way.” He informed, as he moved around the room. “Once we were on that roof, there were at least 13 likely scenarios, which were rigorously worked out and given code names. But, even if I said that he destroyed my reputation, it wasn’t what he truly needed. What he needed...was for me to die.”

“And then, what?”

“He...basically told me that whatever I’d do with him, nothing would prevent the assassins he had hired to kill you, unless…”

“You’d die.”

“And complete his story.” He added. “But the thing I wasn’t able to know was how far Moriarty was prepared to go. I guess that was my fault, on this one. Our first meeting at the swimming pool should have been enough.”

“What did he tell you, back then?”

“He told me about his death wish. And, realized it. He killed himself in front of me when we were on the roof as I told you, and I didn’t have long until the assassins would arrive, most likely. I contacted my brother, and the whole scene started. Each person around was part of the plan, even the pedestrians.”

“You hired...pedestrians?”

“I needed the scene to look real.”

“This street is always empty, this couldn’t have worked?”

“Um...not really. This had to look real, plus they kinda contributed.” He detailed. “Oh and if, them getting killed is part of your concerns, they didn’t. The three of you, and me, were the real targets, they would have only killed anyone trying to fail their mission. And also, if that’s also a concern, the whole street was closed off, like a scene from a play. No accidental arrivals.”

“I didn’t even know all of this was staged. Even the paramedics were?”

“Even them. They’re the ones who faked checking on me so John wouldn’t reach me once I hit the ground.”

“How did he not see, though?” I questionned.

“Before I jumped?” He asked, as I nodded. “I made sure he stayed behind the building situated in front of the hospital. That way, he couldn’t see that I hadn’t actually fallen on the ground, but on an airbag. From that moment, the airbag needed to be cleared out of the way as John came, and as he needed to see a body, a fake one was thrown out of the window.”

“And...what refrained him from running to the body?”

“A well-timed cyclist. He ran into him, giving me the time I needed to exchange places with the corpse, and the rest was only ‘makeup’, I couldn’t be white as a sheet, there had to be blood because of how hard I fell. And, before you ask, what refrained him from feeling my pulse once he had reached me was simply a squash ball under the armpit.”

“You made it sound so…”

“Emotionless? Easy? You could say that.”

“I’d say it’s that. But the moment must have been...I don’t know, between you hearing John, and him feeling helpless upon seeing you.” I said. “Be glad I wasn’t there, because you know I wouldn’t have stayed, the plan would have failed because of me.”

“I know you would have listened, anyway. Don’t underestimate yourself, you’re smarter than you think you are, actually.”

“Compared to you, not really close.”

“If Sherlock Holmes himself tells you that you are smart, it’s not a joke, especially if I say it more than once.”

“Promise you’re not lying?”

“Always.” He promised.

“If you’re always going to be this nice, I might even give up on killing you.”

“Oh, please. Killing me. That’s so two years ago.” He stated, looking right at me as a small grin drew across his face.

“Careful, that can always stay an option. I said that I might, not that I will.”

“I’ll sleep with one eye from now on, then.”

“Then be it, I guess.” I defied, letting my eyes fall on the ground after a few seconds. “I missed having you around.” I admitted with a small voice.

“I’m sorry I made you sad, that wasn’t my intention. I swore that it’d never hurt anyone else other than me, and yet- look at us now.”

“We’re kind of broken, isn’t it?”

“You could say that.”

“Do you think we’ll ever fix it?” I asked, with teary eyes.

“Most likely. Even if that takes years.” He walked towards me, taking a breath before fixing his gaze on me. “I hope that’s the case, I don’t want to keep hurting you.” He confessed, gently taking my hand.

“And I hate not having you around.” I responded, getting up from my spot as I enlaced my arms around his waist, holding tight.

“I’ll do my best to not disappear again.” He spoke out, putting one arm across my back, while the other went on the back of my head, slowly, as if he wasn’t totally at ease with it. “This shows how much you count, I’d never do that usually.”

“I appreciate it, but don’t ruin the moment.”

“You’re even taking your behavior from mine, what’s next? My job?”

“Who knows? I’ve been doing a lot these last two years.”

“I’m sure you’re capable of becoming better than me in less time, and before you throw back the compliment, don’t. This is me...trying to be nice.” He explained, lightly tapping my head before we broke off.

“Thank you for...explaining. I’m glad you’re back.”

“Thank you for…not killing me?” He thanked me, slightly unsure.

“You’re welcome, Holmes.”

“Have you been doing well...lately? I figured we haven’t talked much about your feelings.”

“Oh, that.”

I wish he could be more precise, but he doesn't even know of the ‘other’ feelings, which are more of the love kind.

“...I don’t even know if there’s much, to be honest.” I admitted, looking at him. “I mainly wished it could have been me. A world without you seemed impossible, a great loss, almost unfixable. There was no one else like you, and I...even thought about dying, myself. I was in a really bad place. I even started to do as you weren’t dead, I’d go to your apartment and unconsciously wait for you to return, everyday.”

It seemed like the right thing to do at the time.

“And if you hadn’t come back for another two or three years, I would have believed it, fully- even if a part of me would think it wasn’t possible. Nothing can kill you, you’ve basically survived everything, and I do know you have moments of weakness like everyone, but you’ve always done your best to stay strong, no matter how difficult it was. And me...I’m not like that. I always have a hard time with some cases, and I always stand behind John and you so by the time you look at me, I’m good as new, as if I didn’t start to cry.” I detailed, fidgeting with my hands. “But...when you died, I didn’t cry, I kept all my feelings in a bottle, most of the time. I attempted to keep my head straight, for you, which was after a bit of time. I mostly wish it had been me...instead of you, and I’m aware of what I could have done, to make the pain go away.”

“I really caused a lot of damage, which seems pretty difficult to chug down for now, I lied about a big thing, and I can’t be sorry enough. I know that we can’t make life go back to normal, because nothing will erase this, or make it get forgotten- considered it’s all over the internet now.”

“You’re trending on Twitter?”

“Pretty much...seems like it- the press must have seen me. This will make things quite unpleasant, they’ll probably harass you guys as well, gosh.” He complained, running his hands through his hair.

“What’s ten more journalists? I’m used to it anyway. Besides, we’ve already got a lot of stuff in our hands, and will probably have more. Lestrade is gonna blow your phone again.”

“We do have a lot, including having a talk with him. There’s no way he’s getting away with that, you two are the best I have ever worked with.”

“I was going to say it’s quite rare from you but, I’ll just take the compliment.”

“I mean it, so it’s a good one.” He quietly chuckled. “Is our fight over...or?”

“I’d say so? I mean, there’s gonna be some ‘getting-used-to-you-again’ moments, of course, and some explainings, but I’d say we’re cool, yeah.”

“Then um...is it a good moment to announce that John and Mary are getting engaged? I didn’t want to announce it in the middle of a...death, well- fake death topic.”

“They are? When did they even-”

“Oh, at the visit I paid them. He was most likely about to do it, but then we talked, I said a ‘joke-y’ thing…”

“And he punched you.”

“Right.” He confirmed.

“Let me guess, you don’t have anyone to go to the wedding with?”

“Exactly.”

“And I guess that the person that’d fill the vacant spot to go with you...is me? “

“Correct? I mean, if you’d be okay with it.”

“Well I’ve never been to a wedding so...that’d be a great experience.” I admitted.

“As we say, ‘there’s a first for everything’. Plus, I can call Mary now.”

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“You see, she had to stay with John, to talk him out of killing me, and other stuff that bores me, and she asked me to talk to you, and ask if you wanted to be her wedding attendant...and you said yes.”

“Did you ask me just because Mary asked you to? I feel like there’s another reason for that.”

“Is this really necessary?” He complained.

“I’m asking so...yeah. I guess.” I assumed.

“Fine, I wanted to have you with me. The thought of being with a friend of hers for a whole day annoys me, and I don’t want to have to pretend to have a good time, only to disappoint her at the end of the day.” He sighed. “And yes, I do have a small amount of compassion for people, even if they are all infuriating to the root.”

“Work on it, because people tend to think you’re embarrassed, or have no interest in having a conversation with them.” I advised. “But...I’m glad you thought of me. I’ll be attending this event with you with immeasurable pleasure, Holmes.”

“You just saved the day, I appreciate it. Call me by my name, though. I know you use Holmes as a nickname, but you have the ‘close associate privilege’, use it.”

“Did you just invent this?”

“Probably. Probably not, who knows. Invent your own words, it’s not forbidden by the law, plus who is going to stop us? The queen? Pff, let her try to catch me.”

“Hm, fair enough.” I agreed. “Although, I don’t get why you dislike ‘Holmes’, I’ll attempt to use it less to please you then, Sherlock.”

“It's very kind of you, Detective.”

“Pff, you’re a child.”

“A grown child then, I’d even say I’m superior, whether I’m speaking of now or when I used to be like them.”

“They’re children, chill.”

“That is quite a complicated task to ask, I do not accept being inferior to a toddler.”

“Come on, it’s a child, don’t be so harsh.”

“Quite complicated, once again.”

“Is there anything that’s not complicated? Something?”

“You.”

“What do you mean...by ‘you’?”

“You know it, you’re nice to be with, easy to talk to, understand, I’ve never had issues when it comes to being with you.”

“Woah, that’s...surprising?”

“I do agree that I’m not that open with everyone, you’re simply part of the few people that I can talk more deeply with. The others just get their whole behavior analysed along with harsh critics, you guys are lucky...even if I used to do that when I met you.”

“I still remember it. You don’t take criticism from a renowned detective in a good way, usually.”

“It’s not really to be taken in a mean way, mainly to be honest so I don’t hurt any feelings later on.”

“People actually tend to see it in a mean way.” I confessed.

“Do they?” He questioned.

“Yes.”

“I wasn’t aware of it.”

“And you’re most likely going to erase that from your memory because you don’t like it.”

“Correct, again. I prefer to be honest, always.”

“I know you do. But you weren’t harsh enough to push us away, we’re still supporting you, years after. You’re gonna have to try harder than this.”

“Is this a challenge?”

“If you’d like to see it that way, it can be.” I offered.

“Then I accept it, dear Detective.”

Even if I would like to ask him to call him by my name as I don’t get to do that with ‘Holmes’, I do like when he calls me detective.

It does give me a special feeling, and I miss smiling at that.

“You do know it’s nearly impossible?”

“Oh, please. Did I ever step down because it was ‘impossible’? I’m not anyone.”

“I do know. It’s just that it’s not going to be easy, you tried doing it when we met, and I’m still here.”

“It was just a small joke, this one is more real.”

“Is it? You’ve been failing for years, are you going to make it now?”

“One-hundred percent sure.” He informed me.

“Well then, I wish you good luck on this task, Sherlock.” I wished.

“I appreciate the kind gesture, Detective.”

“So do I.” I answered. “Anyway...what now?”

“We can either go see John again, hoping he won’t punch me- or we can stay here and talk about anything, even come back on my fake death, you can play the role of a journalist- whatever, I guess.” He said, seeming either embarrassed, or out of ideas.

“I say we let him lose his temper, we’ll see tomorrow.”

“I’d hope you’d not choose to see him, thank god. That’s why I like working with you, you always make the right choices.”

“I told you I was special.”

“And years later, you’re still right.” He agreed. “Can you take some water though? I talked a lot, you see.”

“I knew it. It was so weird that you didn’t ask for something for me to do.” I complained, walking to the kitchen.

“Don’t be mad, you have to drink too.”

I quickly came out of the kitchen, letting my bust stick out. “Yeah but who’s getting the glasses? Not you.” I pointed out, getting back inside.

“Strangely I do not have anything to say. You beat me this time.”

“Told you I’m the best!” I yelled, grabbing the glasses as I exited the room. “Man, I get to tell everyone I beat you, isn’t that great?”

“It’s a pretty good thing to brag about. You can be proud.” He offered a smile, settling into a seat. “Come on, we still have a lot to catch up on.” He said, as I set down the glasses on the low table, sitting down. “So, what did I miss?”

I don’t even know if I ever said it today, but; it’s good to have you back home, Sherlock.

|Chapter Three|

#lexies sherlock #sherlock #sherlock holmes #sherlock holmes fic #sherlock holmes fanfiction #sherlock holmes x reader #sherlock fic #sherlock bbc #john watson #mycroft holmes #james moriarty

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fydream · 4 years

Text

✰ how to be a heartbreaker

↳ so what happens when park jisung, the school’s infamous fuckboy runs into the new girl at school? out of boredom he decides it’ll be fun to have someone new to play with, but little does he know, she’s learning how to be a heartbreaker.

a/n: hi! an authors note before this chapter begins! 1. yes i know the formatting is different but that’s only because this chapter is 5.9k words long!! (yes you heard me!! 5.9k!! that’s the most ive written for anything published on this blog!!) so there will be a cut bc i know it’s annoying to scroll past long posts haha. 2. i know i didn’t mention it in this chapter but i just wanted to say that if you did want to listen to music while reading this, during y/n and jisung’s scene you should definitely listen to euphoria by bts and that jeno and donghyuck’s song is i.l.y. by the rose. i hope u guys enjoy!

An hour or so later you're running out your front door to meet Jisung, who already regrets saying he'll wait.

"I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry-" You apologize. "I didn't mean to take that long you must've been bored out of your mind!"

"It's okay." Jisung reassures. "We won't be there that long, we might be a little late to hoco if that's okay with you."

"That's fine!! Just let me text Donghyuck that I'm with you then."

"Okay."

The ride to where Jisung is taking you is quiet, nothing but his various hums to the music he plays as as he drives. It's nice, it reminds you of the first time he gave you a ride home. Quiet, but comfortable.

Instead of looking at your phone you look out the window, then take a second to look at Jisung before looking back out the window again.

You so weren't slick about it either because he notices how you quick you look away and how eager you are to sneak another glance.

"What?" He asks. "Why'd you look at me like that?"

"It's nothing.." You mumble, trying best to hide the smile that's slowly creeping up on your face.

"C'mon." He insists. "Tell me!!" He tries to make it sound like he doesn't care about the topic that much, but his vocal chords work against him as it comes out as a whine.

"Nothing.. It's just.. You look like that, and I look like this.."

"What, you mean beautiful like always?"

Jisung makes note of how quickly your cheeks turn pink at the comment he made.

"You can't just say that!" You argue.

"Yes I can, you're my date tonight after all. What kind of person would I be to not compliment their date?"

You open your mouth, about to speak before he cuts you off from your thought. "And don't worry y/n. I'll take that look as a compliment itself." He snickers.

"Hey!" You shout, earning another laugh from him.

"Hey Jisung?" You ask once the giggles die down.

"Hm?"

"Don't tell anyone I've said this but um.." You start, trailing off at the last part. "Donghyuck has uh, told me things.. about you." You notice how he looks at you, how the expression on his face quickly changes from happy and carefree, to concerned and worried. "I know you probably know what I'm talking about.. I uh- I can kinda.. tell.."

"Yeah." He whispers, trying to block out what you just told him.

"But y'know. I think he's got you all wrong."

"You do?" He asks, a bit too eagerly.

"I do." You say. "From the past how many weeks? Of knowing you, we've gotten close. And I don't think you're anything like that, at least, not anymore.. I've seen the difference between how you act in class and when you're with Jeno and Jaemin, than how you are when we're together and I'd like to hope it isn't just an act. I'm not stupid, y'know."

"I never said you were, I never thought you were either."

"I know. You're not too hard to read, y'know."

For once, Jisung is left speechless. This is the first time anyone has really brought this up on him and he has no idea how to respond. Questions begin to flood his thoughts as he begins to wonder what do you know. Do you know the real reason why he asked you out? How long have you known? What if you never want to talk to him again?

"I-" He tries to speak, but nothing comes out.

"It's okay. I don't know everything about you." You scoff, watching as the boy next to you lets out an exhale. "I don't know that much, but I know enough."

"Enough?" He asks.

"Enough to know that if you are going to break my heart, you should do it right now. Because this is the part where I'm about to tell you how much I like you, and I don't want you getting that satisfaction."

Once you're done talking, you give him a smile. It's a small, innocent, bittersweet smile. It's one of the smiles you would give out to other girls who were ever mean to you, it's subtle, but it gets the point across.

"So what'll be? Park Jisung." You ask, awaiting a response.

Jisung has many things to think about right now, the most important one being driving. He still has yet to process everything you just told him, let alone figure out what to say.

"I.. don't know what to tell you, y/n." He sighs. "I don't want to hurt you.. Can you give me a few minutes?"

"You can have all the time in the world, sweetheart."

When Jisung finally decides to talk to you once you've reached your destination. If you're going to be honest, it was the most awkward car ride you've been in.

"Okay." He starts, closing his car door. "I know that was way more than a few minutes but I just wanted to tell you this here."

The spot that he had taken you to was a little hill area, on the other side of town. From the top of it you could see the sun set as it's golden rays covered the place you called home. You weren't going to lie, it was beautiful indeed but you didn't care for it at the moment. What you wanted to know was what he was going to say.

"I was.. gonna tell you this here no matter what happened so uh.. Here goes nothing?" There's hesitation, and you can already tell that whatever he was going to tell you was something big. "I'm not here to break your heart, y/n. I know, that's what you thought and probably what everyone else thought too but.. you're different. I know this."

Your brain wants you to call bullshit on that statement but your heart prevents you from doing so. The logical part of you believes that it's probably all a lie, an act just to get you to fall for him. You know this. You know the stories, you've seen the receipts of what he's done to people before you, and you can only assume the things he'll do just to make you fall for him. But if you knew this, then why does it still work?

"Am I really different?" You ask, looking up at him with shaky eyes.

He chuckles.

"Well, yeah. For starters, you're the first girl to ever call me out on my bullshit like that so.." He jokes. "I know.. you're scared. But you shouldn't be." He whispers. "You really are different. I promise."

"Listen, Jisung." You start. "I really want to believe you. It's just hard, because you haven't really given me a reason on why I should."

"That's okay. I understand." He says softly. "I didn't expect you to."

For a second, your heart breaks. It would've continued if he didn't continue talking right then and there.

"But what if I told you all the reasons why you should?" He asks, giving you a shy smile.

"What are they?"

"Well first of all. You're smart. You're smarter than I'll ever be. You've figured me out in what? The span of three months? You don't give yourself enough credit than you deserve. Second of all, you're really passionate about a lot of things. Like that time we argued in the library over the best Stranger Things season? Even though you were wrong, you kept arguing against me."

"Hey!" You exclaim, while Jisung gives you a smile in response.

"Third of all, you're really cute. Don't think I don't notice how your nose scrunches whenever I make a comment you don't like, or how easily you get excited over the simplest things. Remember when we walked to the cafe across the street from school? You got excited because the place had good boba, out of all things. Do you know how ridiculous you sounded?"

"Well- yeah! That's because it was a cafe! And not a boba shop!" You defend.

"I'm kidding." He chuckles. "Also, did you know that whenever you get embarrassed over something not only your cheeks turn pink, but your nose does too."

"You can stop now.. y'know.." You mumble.

"These are just a few things that I like about you, y/n. Do I need to tell you all of them for you to believe me?" He asks, looking at you innocently, as if he didn't just give you the biggest ego boost of all time.

"I believe you." You giggle as he pulls you in for a tight hug.

"Thanks, love." He whispers, placing a light kiss on the top of your head. "Now it's your turn. What were you going to tell me in the car?"

The next hour or so is spent with you two talking about each other, both of you giving out compliments as if there were no tomorrow. If it weren't for the sun being completely gone then you two probably wouldn't have noticed how long you've been alone together.

"Oh my god." Jisung exclaims. "What time is it?"

"Uhm.. Seven fifteen?" You respond, quite confused on why he was suddenly freaking out.

"We have to go, now. They're going to close the doors in like ten minutes."

"Oh. Okay!" You smile, eagerly skipping back to Jisung's car with his hand intertwined with yours. "We better get going then, huh?"

"Y/n said that she might be late because she's with Jisung already." Donghyuck tells Renjun and Chenle once pull up in front of his house.

Renjun had driven both of them together due to them only being a block away from each other. Donghyuck on the other hand was going to drive you, but when you texted him that you were already with Jisung he decided to ask Renjun for a ride. "Sorry for the inconvenience.. by the way." He mumbles, buckling his seat belt.

"It's alright. Where do you think they went?" Renjun asks.

"Hell if I know. This is the most I've seen Jisung do for anyone." Donghyuck retorts, clearly bitter about being ditched by his best friend.

"Should we be worried?" Chenle asks.

"I don't think so." Donghyuck responds. "Y/n is her own person and she can handle herself, plus what the fuck is Jisung even gonna do? They probably went to take pictures or something."

Chenle shrugs. "I guess so. How are you doing then?"

"What do you mean?"

Chenle shrugs again. "You know what I mean. During the time you two fought you barely said anything to each other, it was just her hanging out with Jisung. Then, even after you made up she ditched us to hang out with him and even now they're probably on a date before the dance or something. How are you dealing with it?"

Once Chenle is done talking, Renjun shoots him a glare before hitting him lightly on the back of his head.

"Ouchie.. That hurt!" Chenle whines. "Aren't you supposed to be driving Junnie.~~" He teases.

"Yeah but I'm also trying to make sure no one fucking cries tonight." He hisses. "Why would you even ask that?"

"I dunno. Was curious I guess?"

"Haven't you heard the phrase curiosity killed the cat?"

"It's been alright." Donghyuck says to prevent Renjun from harming Chenle any more. "I haven't really thought about it I guess? I mean.. I was the one who assigned her to Jisung after all so.."

"Do you think she y'know? Likes him?" He asks.

"Chenle!"

"Whaaaat?? I'm just asking."

"Zhong Chenle you will drop this topic before I stop this car and make you walk to homecoming alone."

"You wouldn't do that. You love me too much."

"Don't try me." Renjun threatens, turning on his blinker.

"Okay okay.. god.."

"Are you two done arguing now?" Donghyuck asks, rolling his eyes. "And no, Chenle. I don't think she does. If she did she would've told me by now."

"Alright Hyuck.. Whatever you say."

Sooner than later the three arrive at school where Renjun drops off Chenle and Donghyuck to hop in the line already forming before leaving to park his car.

"Ask any more questions Lele, and you're walking home." Renjun threatens before Chenle slams the car door on him.

"I mean it this time!" Renjun yells as he watches the two boys walk away from him.

"So." Chenle starts as Renjun drives off. "What's your answer?"

Donghyuck gives him a confused look. "Answer?"

"To y'know.. the question."

"I already told you."

"No silly, I meant your real answer."

Donghyuck is silent for a second before he decides to answer.

"How did you know?" He asks, and Chenle giggles.

"You just told me." He laughs. "I didn't think you'd walk into that one, Hyuck."

"Oh shut up." Donghyuck teases. "It's not like it would matter or anything."

"I supposed you're right." Chenle hums. "But if it did.. Then what?"

"Then I'd tell her to get out of there." Donghyuck whispers to himself.

"Hm?"

"Oh- uh, nothing. I dunno." Donghyuck responds. He knows he has no chance in fooling Chenle but even after that response you'd know not to bother him about the topic anymore.

Once Renjun is done parking he meets up with the two boys and they discuss about how their night will go. While the line slowly moves Renjun argues with Chenle that they should take photos first. Chenle argues back saying that he wants snacks and that all the good ones will be gone if they wait too long. While this goes on Donghyuck has been sending you frequent texts.

[hyuck: hey! we're in line now! see you in a bit?]

[hyuck: are you on your way soon?]

[hyuck: pls hurry.. renle fighting.. dk what to do..]

Needless to say, you haven't responded to any one of them, leaving Donghyuck wonder what you were even doing.

After successfully waiting in line and making it through their schools quick security check, Chenle, Renjun, and Donghyuck had finally made it inside the gymnasium where the dance was being held.

Once inside they move to an quieter place, where they could talk without having to yell over the already loud music that's being played.

"What about you Hyuck?" Renjun asks. "What do you want to do first?"

"Hmm? What? Sorry." Donghyuck responds, checking his phone once more before pocketing it. "What's happening?"

Renjun frowns. "You weren't listening, huh?"

"No, sorry." He apologizes. "Y/n hasn't texted me back yet and I don't want to do anything until she gets here y'know?"

"Don't worry Hyuck, it's possible they're still outside or something. They just opened the doors y'know."

"Yeah I know.. I'm just.. yeah."

Ten minutes later, you still haven't responded and the music is loud, but it's not loud enough to drown out Donghyuck's heartbeat as he frantically awaits your arrival. As each second passes by he begins to regret letting you go with Jisung, because you're never late, but the second that he lets Jisung control how your night starts you're ten minutes late and they're be closing the doors to the dance soon.

Renjun begins to notice that you aren't here either and decides walk over to Donghyuck to ask if he knew where you were.

"Hyuck, is Y/n here yet?" He asks, tapping his shoulder lightly.

Donghyuck gives no verbal response, instead he shakes his head while he fiddles with his phone checking back if you happened to text him. "I don't know where she is Junnie.."

"Hey, it's okay." He reassures. "It's not like she's in danger or anything, I know you don't trust Jisung that much but I doubt he'd do anything to hurt her. She'll be here soon, okay? I promise."

"Junnie~~" Chenle whines, popping up from behind them. "I'm boredddd. Can't we just do something already?"

"Lele, not now." Renjun shoos. "We're talking here."

"It's okay." Donghyuck says. "You guys can go do something, it's fine. I don't want to keep you from having fun tonight."

"Are you sure?" Renjun asks, he knows not to believe Donghyuck but he's getting quite annoyed at the fact that Chenle keeps pulling at his arm.

"Yeah. It's fine, if anything happens I'll text one of you."

"You heard him!! Let's go!!" Chenle exclaims before grabbing Renjun by the arm to drag him to god knows where.

"Chenle!" Renjun yelps. "I-I'll text you Hyuck! We won't be gone for long. I swear!" He yells back at him.

And then the two were gone. Leaving Donghyuck alone, by himself.

One of the worst feelings in the world is feeling alone, in a place full of people.

He doesn't know why he let them go off without him, maybe it's because he wanted to be alone, or maybe it's because he didn't know any better. But standing alone on the sides of a school dance, with no one to talk to really shows how lonely you are. He knows none of you meant to do it to him on purpose, it's just him overthinking things after all. But if he was okay with them leaving, then why did it hurt?

Deciding it was awkward enough to just stand there and people watch, Donghyuck decides to go back on his phone. He checks your text messages only to see no response. "Great." He thinks to himself. "You said you would be here, but you're not. I guess you did spend a lot of time with them after all."

Donghyuck feels himself about to cry when someone taps his shoulder. He closes his eyes trying to fight back the few tears that threaten to spill before having to talk to whoever was with him. He didn't want to answer any questions on why he was crying, only knowing that if someone asked him if he was okay he wouldn't be able to control them.

When Donghyuck looks up from his phone, the last person he expected to see is standing in front of him.

"Hi." Jeno greets. It's short, and airy. But it's just enough to get his heart racing. Is it from fear? Worry? Or is it from the fact that his ex, just so happened to catch him at the wrong place and wrong time.

"Hi." Donghyuck responds. It doesn't mean much because he didn't put any emotion into it, instead he decides to focus his attention elsewhere. He looks past Jeno towards the entrance of the gymnasium in hopes of seeing you walk in, spoiler alert, you didn't. "Chenle and Renjun picked the worst time to leave.." He thinks to himself. "I can't blame them though, after all I did tell them it was okay."

"You um- You look beautiful." Jeno compliments, giving Donghyuck a half-hearted smile. "So I've been told.." Donghyuck murmurs before attempting to push past the boy standing in front of him. "Listen. I don't have any time for this right now. Y/n said she would be here and she's not so-"

"Hyuck- Donghyuck, wait." Jeno starts, grabbing Donghyuck's wrist to prevent him from going any further.

"What the fuck? Let go of me!" He yells. It's loud enough to get the attention of a few people around him, but the music the DJ is playing is way to loud for them to have heard what he said.

"Hyuckie, I- Will you please let me explain?" Jeno practically begs, this is the first time that he and Donghyuck have interacted in person since the break up and he can already tell that he's blowing it.

"Don't- Don't call me that." Donghyuck states, hesitant to answer. "You've already explained yourself enough."

"Hyuckie.. Please. We haven't talked in months, you haven't let me say anything."

Of course, Jeno had to find Donghyuck in one of these moments, where one of their songs was being played by the DJ. It was one of the songs that Jeno had showed him, meaning it left such a big impact on his heart. He doesn't know what to do, does he accept Jeno's offer and let him explain? Or does he continue the rest of his high school career pretending that Jeno doesn't exist, leaving many questions unanswered.

Panic starts to fill Donghyuck as he looks around to see if anyone had noticed him and Jeno together. It would cause a bunch of talk, considering that fact that they were both pretty popular and that teenagers loved to start rumors.

He notices Jaemin as he spots Jeno from across the room, by the way Jaemin is walking towards them he can tell that he was looking for Jeno himself, clearly unhappy and very confused where he found him. He glances back at the entrance for a split second before looking towards the direction that his two friends had gone off in, only to see them walking back towards him, just as confused as Jaemin is. He can see the concern rise in Renjun once he sees who Donghyuck is with, as he grabs Chenle's arm to drag him across the makeshift dance floor that their school has created, where Chenle had decided to stop to talk to a few friends.

He looks back towards the entrance and to his luck he sees you and Jisung walk in. Thankful, he lets out a sigh of relief because he sees that you're here and that you're safe. He notices the smile that you have on your face and though he was a bit far away he can tell it's a genuine smile, like one of the one's you would show him when it was just you two hanging out. "I guess I worried for nothing." He thinks to himself, as he watches you two skip in, hands intertwined.

And amongst all this commotion happening at once, his ex, out of all people had to come up to him and ask him a question he knew he wouldn't be able to answer. So what does he do? He panics, of course.

"Oh my fucking god.." Donghyuck mumbles to no one in particular. Jeno seems to hear it but he doesn't process it because he's too busy being dragged by Donghyuck who was attempting to blend in with the big group of people who happened to pass by.

When Renjun, Chenle, and Jaemin end up where Donghyuck and Jeno were previously standing they're left more confused on where the two went. Though it's loud, Donghyuck manages to pick out Renjun's voice yell "What the fuck?" over a crowd of teenagers.

Donghyuck smiles to himself, knowing that he successfully got away. He didn't think it'd work, he'd only seen it in movies before and you know what people say, it's just movie magic after all.

"Where are we going?" Jeno asks innocently.

"Outside." Donghyuck responds, leading their way towards the "exit" sign on the other side of the gymnasium.

"Why?" Jeno asks once more, and Donghyuck turns around just to shoot him a glare.

"So no one. fucking. sees us." He grits through his teeth.

Needless to say, Jeno doesn't ask any more questions after that.

"Where is everyone?" You ask Jisung through the fit of giggles you let out.

"I dunno. Jeno isn't answering his phone so I'll call Jaemin, yeah?" He responds, just as giddy as you are.

"Oh, I was talking about Renjun, Chenle, and Hyuck."

"You can hang with us for a bit!" Jisung insists.

"I know but I haven't seen them all day." You pout. "I'll hang out with you after!! Besides, they're my best friends after all. How would you feel if I took you away from Jeno and Jaemin?"

"My dear you're allowed to do that any day of the week. I like you better than them anyways." He teases.

"Oh shut up. You know what I meant." You snort. "Can we just go find them please?"

"Yeah, hold on- Hi Jaemin!" Jisung says through his phone. "What? Sorry.. I can't really hear you. Is that Renjun? Why is he yelling at you?"

Your ears perk up hearing the name of your friend leave Jisung's mouth. "Renjun?" You ask, looking at him curious. "Are they okay?"

Jisung nods at you while trying to hear what Jaemin has to say, it's hard considering the fact that there's not only loud music coming from his phone speakers but the voice of an angry boy as well, and to add onto that, the same music being played just a couple feet away from you.

Pouting, you look at him. Jisung can tell you're worried about your friends by the way that your pupils shake as he pulls you into another tight hug, hoping to ease a bit of the worry.

From then you can kind of make out the conversation on the phone, it's something about Jeno and Donghyuck being together then suddenly disappearing out of thin air, like a magic trick.

"Where are you?" Jisung asks.

"We're in one of the back corners." Jaemin yells through his phone. "The uhh.. One on the right, your left."

"Okay. We're on our way." Jisung says before hanging up.

"I guess our night of fun had to end somewhere." He tells you before you two head further into the gymnasium to meet up with your friends.

Once you meet up with the three boys you're greeted with a hug from Chenle while you watch as Renjun and Jaemin argue.

"So they were right here?" You ask tapping Renjun's shoulder.

"Yeah. And then all of a sudden they disappeared." He says, quite frantically.

"Y'know worrying isn't going to do anything." Jaemin taunts.

"Yeah! And you making snarky comments doesn't help either!" Renjun shoots back.

"Can you two stop bickering a second?" Chenle snaps, surprising all of you. "We have no idea where the fuck they went and for the past five minutes all you two have done is argue? Why haven't we checked anywhere yet?"

"Because, Lele. They could be anywhere. We're in a room full of teenagers." Renjun states.

"For once, I agree with this one." Jaemin adds on, earning a glare from Renjun and a facepalm from Jisung.

"Okay? And? Have you ever thought about the fact that they could y'know, be outside?" Chenle asks.

"Why would they be outside?" You ask.

"Because it's loud in here, and it looked like they wanted to talk."

"So.." Jeno says, swinging his legs back and forth. He was currently seated on top of one of the picnic tables your school had, while Donghyuck was standing across from him, leaning against the corner of a wall.

"You said you would explain, so explain." Donghyuck states.

Jeno takes a deep breath as he stops swinging his legs, he looks at the ground before looking up towards Donghyuck who was already looking at him, clearly annoyed at the fact that Jeno was stalling.

"It was a dare." He starts, before Donghyuck cuts him off.

"Yes I know. We all know." He spits.

"But theres more." Jeno says once again. "As you know, Jisung dared me to ask you out and me, being the asshole I was back then, I agreed and decided to do so.." He pauses for a second. Trying to think of what to say next.

"Listen are you gonna keep stopping or are you going to tell the story?" Donghyuck comments, it's only been two minutes and he's already fed up with Jeno's bullshit.

"I am. I'm just trying to think about the right words to say."

"Why? So that I can fall back in love with you?"

"No, Hyuckie-"

"I said, don't call me that."

"Why?"

"Because Jeno!" Donghyuck yells, voice cracking as he tries to control the same tears from earlier from falling. "I am still in love with you! Each time I hear you say that stupid nickname my heart does leaps and I can't fucking stop it!"

His voice is loud enough for you to figure out where he is, and while the other students outside look around trying to find out what's going on, both you and Renjun take off running towards the sound of Donghyuck's voice.

Arriving in time to hear Donghyuck finish the last words of his sentence he can't tell if he's hurt or if he's relieved to see you. A sense of relief washes over him once he spots you, Renjun, and Chenle running in his direction. But then he sees Jisung and Jaemin, not that far behind you three, and he feels hurt, betrayed to say the most.

"So this is why you asked me, huh?" He scoffs, looking at Jeno with glossy eyes. "So you and your friends can get a little more enjoyment of my misery."

"Hyuckie- I-" Jeno starts.

"Save it. I don't ever want to hear from you again, Jeno. I can't believe I even believed you would tell me the truth."

Nothing more is said as Donghyuck walks away from all of you, and Jaemin and Jisung run towards Jeno. It's quiet, despite there being the sounds of the muffled music that's only being played from a hallway away, it feels like a horror movie with the unsettling silence between all of you.

Renjun is the first one to talk. His voice not only startles you, but grabs the attention of Jeno, Jisung, and Jaemin who happened to be a few feet in front of you.

"What the fuck happened?" He asks, looking at Jeno in the eye.

"I wanted to tell him that I'm sorry.. and that I missed things the way they were.." Jeno says, voice barely above a whisper.

Both you and Chenle can tell that Renjun is about to start yelling and if someone doesn't stop him now then fists will be thrown. Renjun is about to start talking again when Chenle interupts him.

"Junnie." He says softly, placing a hand on his shoulder. "It's not worth it. Let's just go find Hyuck, okay?" He eases.

Renjun takes a second to sigh and relaxes before deciding to head off with Chenle, he know's it'll only make things worse but he really wants to tell the three boys off and possibly throw a punch or two. "It's okay.." Chenle coos at him.

"Y/n, are you coming?" He asks, looking back at you.

"Uhh.. Yeah. Just give me a second. I'll meet up with you in a bit, okay? Just text me where you are." You say quickly before glancing over at Jeno and his crew.

Chenle looks at you, confused on why you were looking at Jeno. It only takes him a second to realize what you were doing before he walks off with a hesitant nod. "Um.. Okay.. Just uh, don't be long. I know Hyuck wanted to see you."

"Thanks Lele. You're the best." You say, before talking off towards Jeno.

"Lee Jeno." You state, standing where Donghyuck previously was. You earn a few glances from Jisung and Jaemin, ask if they were asking each other why you were here and how long you've been there. It's not because they were doing anything bad or wrong, it's because of the fact that they were caught being nice and genuine to one of their friends, something that barely anyone has seen before.

"Y/n." Jeno sniffs, trying his best to wipe away the tears that had managed to leak out. "What are- What are you doing here?"

"Save it." You say, walking towards him. You push Jaemin away as you take a seat on top of the table next to him. It earns you a glare from Jaemin, but you shrug it off and ignore him once he start's complaining that you stole his spot.

"Just- Just tell me everything." You sigh, awaiting a response from the boy next to you.

Jaemin shoots you another look before Jisung walks away with him, knowing this should be a private conversation. They don't go far though, just out of earshot.

"This is my fault." He starts. "If I just continued letting him hate me, then I wouldn't have hurt him like that.."

"It's not your fault, you just wanted to explain things. Do you want to tell me what you were going to tell him? Or is that too personal?" You ask.

Jeno is hesitant to answer. His first initial thought is no, but as the seconds go by his answer changes to yes.

"Start from the top. What happened?" You ask.

You're gentle, and being patient with him. It's something that he's thankful for. It's also something that reminds him of Donghyuck, because whenever the two of them had disagreements Donghyuck would always wait for Jeno to explain, this was the first time he hadn't.

"Okay well.." Jeno sniffs. "If you didn't already know.. Donghyuck and I used to date. Our relationship started off from a dare but as our months together passed by I began to enjoy his company a little bit more. I don't know what it was, and if you asked me I wouldn't be able to tell you but there was just something about him that I ended up liking. Maybe it's the way that his hair flopped on his face each time he ran up to me, or maybe it's because of how tightly he hugged me and how gentle his kisses were, but it was something." He pauses for a second, reliving through a few memories. "I ended up catching feelings.. and as soon as I figured out that I did, he found out how we got together."

"Oh." You sigh, not looking at him.

"I was going to tell him that I meant everything I told him.. All the 'I love you's' and the 'You look beautiful's' but he just wouldn't let me talk.. And then you guys came and that just- that only made things worse.. and now- god.. now he's gone. He said he never wants to see me again."

"I'm sorry, Jeno. It's my fault." You say softly, taking all the blame. "I'm the one who brought everyone here, if it weren't for me then you probably would be talking to him right now."

"It's okay." He reassures. "It's not your fault.. You just wanted to help your friend. I'm sure it would've gone poorly even if you weren't here."

"I doubt that's true."

"Are you kidding me y/n? He hates me! And he the worst part of it is that he has every right to do so.."

"I didn't know people who hated each other confess to each other about still liking one another." You joke, hoping to earn a laugh from Jeno. "Besides, it's not like you won't see each other again. You still have time to make things better, plus you have me on your side."

"My side?" Jeno asks.

"Well yeah. You still like him don't you?"

Jeno sighs, he's lucky you aren't paying that much attention to him because if you did you would've noticed the way he looked at Jisung and how it hurt him more to let you keep going on like this. Nonetheless he lets it happen and he wonders if he really does deserve your help.

"You're too good, y/n."

192 notes · View notes

aestheticsuwu · 3 years

Text

🌅Found Peace In Your Violence 🌅

Dean Winchester x Castiel

..... ..... ......... ....... ............ ....... .......

Moving to a new place for a new start was always hard for Castiel . He wasn't really a people person , not because he didn't like them . It was just that his " people skills " are " rusty " as he likes to say .

His mother and Father liked to adopt & foster until they divorced .

Father had gotten custody of everyone and got remarried to Becky , my mother used to call her the annoying , crazy ,bitch etc , etc . He wonders how she's doing , she wasn't quite the best mother but he still remembers everyone that comes and goes from his life .

His family was weird , they weren't like other family's. It always seemed to be a competition among each other . It even caused almost half his siblings to leave and never look back . Anna is probably living the craziest life with no rules .

Balthazer is probably running a fashion line . Or maybe there all with Lucifer breaking the rules and rebelling to everything. Although he thinks Balthazar would have gone far away from those three . He was the one he miss the most .

Father doesn't like talking about them , maybe he doesn't cares . We were after all kids he took in his home to create a batallion of soldiers that's what Gabriel says all the time . It was now 9 members of the family that was left . His Father , Becky , their son Alfie , Michael the oldest , Gabriel the trickster, Eileen Leahy his favorite sister , she was the last child to be recruited from the foster house . I was the youngest one from the rest of the herd .

..... ..... .....

His Mother was the first to go , should he still call her that . Once the divorce papers was filed , Naomi packed her stuff and slammed the door shut . Castiel waited for her to come back that night . Hours went by but she never came back .

Anna soon left after , She had left in there middle of the night .

Father wasn't upset he just announced that we should move soon .

3 week before moving , dad and Raphael had a fight . Father faced him and gave him ultimatum, it had seemed for a while everything was alright . But Lucifer had other plans ,he had managed to convince raph that he shouldn't listen to father .

The move was cancelled , and when Gabriel had started prank wars against everyone Father wasn't even there to ground him . Balthazar told his siblings that he would soon move out he was 18 after all . He talked about his dreams , plans and adventures . Michael and lucifer didn't sticked around to listen only Gabriel, Eileen, and him .

He promised that every time he would go visit a different place he would bring back souvenirs . And once he was stabled they would take a family trip together .

In their last hug castiel didn't want to let go , something told him that he wasn't gonna see him anymore .

When he was 15 , standing near the porch in front the house waiting for Balthazar to appear until father shouted his name . They had to get on the road to head to their new home . All he could do was hold Eileen and Gabriel's hand .

..... ... .....

Everything was calm , other than the fear of not knowing if you were the next victim of Gabriel's prank list .

Eileen was teaching him to get better at sign language . Michael was going to college while Lucifer was only 17 but seemed no to be interested in school . Becky had Alfie. Silence didn't exist in the household .

. And for once he had a friend , He was kinda surprised she stucked around.

Her name was Kelly Kline , she was in the debate team and a Straight A student . He met her through Eileen . He understood why they both got along . Both were strong minded girls and didn't let anybody tell them shit .

Kelly wanted to make a change and she wanted both Eileen and him to help her . And to this day he doesn't understand why the world took her away soon .

She was pretty , she had raven hair and had a kind smile . She taught him good things can come out of the bad things . She made him want to do things he normally wouldn't do .

So he honestly didn't understand what she saw in Lucifer. They would constantly bicker but yet they were together . Eileen would just let him rant about bees because she preferred that instead of seeing him wallow .

Gabriel would often give him advice that would make her be interested but it usually involve some porno Gabe once watched . And Castiel usually didn't know If he was kidding or not .

But then suddenly His brother and best friend broke up . Kelly wanted to go out and forget she ever dated an asshole . Lucky for her They were invited to a party .

He doesn't quite remember that much of that night .

" Are you sure you want to do this . I think we are extremely intoxicated and not in our right minds . And we might doing a mistake that we will regret , I'm not saying I regret making out with you cause your an amazing girl I have ever meet besides Eileen but that's different cause she's my sister and I don't think of her that way , And now I made this so awkward by bringing up m- "

A hand covering his mouth making him stop ranting . looking up to see her , and the fear he once had just vanished just by looking at her smile

" Castiel ! There are alot of regrets that I have done including that I ever got involve with that douchebag . I just want to make a choice that I know won't end up as a mistake . "

..... ...... .....

That choice was inevitable to hide , not because both Kelly and castiel started a somewhat relationship . It was revealed on a Thursday that Kelly was pregnant .

Lucifer was never one take responsibility for his actions , so he told her to get rid of it .

" yeah I'm not planning to do some father bonding or give up my plans for a baby that might not even be mine . Hey you can't lie and deny that you haven't been jumping back and forth with Novak brothers . But wow really castiel , but look at the bright side you can dump all that responsibility to him . He will believe anything - ".

The sound of the slap that Kelly gave him echoed but it wasn't enough so she kneed him on the balls and lastly punched him .

" I hope you rot in hell , "

That was the last conversation she had with him when Eileen told her he had left the house .

... ..... ..... ..... ....

Father never showed how it affected him when his children left . But now that Lucifer left , he started to drink again and he looked sad .

He shook it off when it had been a week later . It seemed a good time to mention someone pregnancy. Father didn't think the same , he was quite mad , especially when it was revealed that they weren't sure who the father was . He remained calm afterwards when they all agreed it was 90 percent Lucifers .

Castiel was only 18 and now left with the mess of his own brother .

Once he graduated he stopped seeing Kelly for 5 months . Eileen would lecture him how he was being a bad friend , how he should be more supportive. He let 2 more months pass by and he couldn't help but ask Eileen how was Kelly doing .

That's how he end up in her room , Kelly was glowing . She had belly bump , He apologized for not being by her side , for letting their friendship tumble down the drain . She forgave him , discussing what they had missed . Avoiding the topic of the elephant of the room , until the baby kicked .

Castiel loved the baby already .

..... ..... .....

They never really tackled in depth of truth of who was the father . Castiel didn't put mind into it , since he felt the baby move he doesn't know how to explain it . it was like epiphany , a connection.

So he soon took the role , he read books , used the internet , asked some questions from Becky that rambled on and on but he still got information he needed . In favor that he would learn and be ready when his baby would come . He helped Becky with Alfie , at first it was hard but then it was fine

" your gonna be alright , you got this castiel . "

" I hope so . "

... .... ..... .... .... .... .....

It happened so fast , his mind was so confused one second he's in bed and then he's at the hospital . Every time she would scream of pain he felt bad . his hand was hurting from the way she was holding it .She held a grimace from every contraction .

" It hurts so much , I don't think I can't do it . Ahhh baby you have to go easy on mommy . "

She screamed again of agony , she hold his hand tighter as if it would help from the pain .

" You can , your strong and soon we will be at home I'll be taking care of our baby while you rest and sleep . How does that sound ? "

" That sounds like the best idea "

..... ...... ...... ....

He feels like he failed , he could've done something or maybe done something different . He didn't think Kelly would leave him , she promised no to . He guess it wasn't a coincidence, life seemed to take everything from him .

Today was supposed to be the happiest day in his life . Now he's holding onto his siblings , crying seemed it would help but the feeling wouldn't go away .

" Its gonna be alright cassie , it's gonna get better . "

He really hoped Gabe was right .

...

He was following the nurses that was leading him to his baby . He didn't even got to see his newborn , it just happened to fast .

The nurse open the door wide to let him pass , his hands were shaking waiting for her directions .

" Here they are , seems like they were waiting for dad to come see them . Congratulations Mr Novak and I'm sorry for you loss ."

stunned he couldn't answer , he had his eyes only for them . he heard the door close he assumed she left to give him privacy . Tears started to build up but of happiness.

" We're gonna be ok , I will do my best because your all I got . I love you so much , Mommy loved you so much but she had to go rest . I think she deserves it , how ironic how she always said there was an angel watching you over . Now you do , . "

Chuckling , as he wipes away his tears trying to compose himself . Letting out a shaky breath he starts speaking again .

" I guess is time to give you a name , bear this in mind when the time comes be thankful I didn't give you a horrendous name . You in the other hand are lucky because Kelly had already picked out one for you . "

Smiling as they both made a noise that seemed they were going along with him on the conversation.

.... ..... .

" I'm so ready to meet my nephew !! , I'm so excited !!! "

" shhh " " shhhhhhh"

"shh " " Shhh " "sHhhh"

It wasn't like Gabriel was screaming , sheesh these people sometimes , ready to respond he stays quiet when he sees his brother motioning his family to come closer .

" Say Hello to Jack and Claire Novak . "

.... ..... ..... ..... ... .....

His kids were his pride and young , he will admit he struggled at first but with the help of his siblings he catched on . They had already turned two , they were growing so fast . Both are so smart and beautiful .

Claire with her beautiful blue eyes and blonde hair that were in pigtails in the moment . She was a troublemaker but love her endlessly. Jack is his small bee , he was tiny and adorable . The kid loves nougat , he blames it on Gabriel. He also had blonde hair but he had golden eyes .

He wants the best for his kids , thats why he was contemplating on Gabriel's plan to move .

Gabe was planning to open another bakery ,

since his last three was successful and was trying expand his work . Father was quite happy with Gabriel , he helped with everything he could do . As usual Gabe took advantage and stacked up on candy , his response was always with

" he won't even notice , he has enough and more . So shut up and help me decided between those two , who am i kidding Im taking both . "

Eileen was going with Gabriel, something about a fresh start . Michael was only going to keep an eye on his siblings , Fathers orders . And his big brother isn't one to disobey , he was gonna get paid for babysitting gabe . His study's are kept on hold until father says so .

Castiel didn't know what to do . He was a highschool dropout , father of fraternal twins , relying with the money of his father and it wasn't like someone is waiting for him here .

Maybe this would do him good and for his kids .

Gabriel went full on screamed of joy that he had accepted, screaming that they were gonna have a blast . Michael was boxing their stuff fully knowing the trickster of his brother wouldn't do it , he turns to look at the youngest giving him a pointed look .

..... ..... ..... ...

Gabriel was full on rambling of why he choose the location . He wanted a challenge and one of the many things he loves to do is

1: Himself

2:Candy

3: Pranks

4: proving Dad wrong

Once the trickster told his father his plans , he told him no . To him is practically a Yes , he wasn't planning getting him self involved , oh well you gotta do what you gotta do .

Michael was pissed but hey he could just for once say no to dad . Eileen and Castiel and his nephew coming along was the best thing of the trip . He might even admit that he's kinda glad dad forced his big bro to come along .

The perks of having a wealthy father is that they had everything solved . Airplane . Check . Ride CHECK. House check . Moving Truck . Check . Schelduing everything on the same date ...........

It wasn't his fault , who would in their right mind would leave him with all that responsibility. They got to their flight , the ride into country , House was there and with their boxes surrounding it . Hey they got Michael might as well put use to his muscles .

..... .... ... ..... ....

" Only you would do this Gabriel , I don't know why I let you drag me into this "

" Look at the bright side , were surrounded with some hot cowboys " Eileen spoke and signed with a mischievous smirk .

" see cassie , even Eileen not complaining , just relax . Take a deep breath and - Ok you grab that box and I will take the heavier one . "

Gabe said as to fool Michael they were helping but as the annoyed glared they were all receiving it was obviously the 3 younger siblings were just resting .

" Your doing well Michael keep up the good work "

They all burst out laughing when the oldest retorted with a angry 'Shut up ! '

" Maybe we should help " She said & signed to both of them .

" yeah , I'm gonna go check on the kids , they might wake up any --- . "

Turning around to see where the noise was coming from , he took in the sight of a sleek black jaguar . Squinting to block the sun , he hears the person above signalling the horse to halt .

" I wasn't informed new people were moving in , Welcome . "

Removing his stetson , he looks at them but his gaze fall onto the bluest eye he had ever seen and the cutest head tilt . Making his Voice huskier and putting on his best smile he asked .

" Dean Winchester .

Need A Hand , Angel ? "

..... ...... . ... ...... ...... .....

24 notes · View notes

shinwhoohoo · 3 years

Note

Boy do I have so much to say about the whole jinyoung thing. generally speaking, I never read too much into Jinyoung( and baro) leaving WM. I have been a kpop fan for well over 10 years and while I haven't really loved a group as much as i love B1A4, I have seen a number of groups and their members leave. So when I read things of people seeming so salty and mad about the whole split, I can't really relate./1

Ultimately, both Jinyoung and Baro did what the believed was the best for themselves and what they wanted in their career. I believe when it came down to contract renewal, Jinyoung being the generally ambitious person that he is, was basically sweettalked into Link8 with slightly empty promises( and maybe even asked to contribute some funds to the creation of the company). 2/

Link8 just generally didn’t seem like they knew how to manage an artist like jinyoung who wanted to work as an actor as well as still work on music. Like they had a general idea but I don’t believe they knew to what extent how much it would take. They essentially just fumbled, like a lot. Like sure he did a few things here and there but honestly when you hear that an artist or even actor has an exclusive contract with a company, you kinda just expect more. 3/

Like hey they’re going invest so much money into promoting their talents, get them as many great roles as possible, etc. And that kind of just didn’t happen. To add onto that, jinyoung had to enlist. And they definitely weren’t as prepared as they could of been. (there’s the excuse that they were a small newly established company but ultimately that’s just an excuse). In addition to their only talent and source of income not being able to work, the pandemic started in 2020.

So that’s an even bigger strain on the company. So, hearing that Jinyoung left Link8, does not surprise me. They generally let him down as well as his fans. I think it was silly in the first place for him to not sign with an acting agency( though I’m assuming he wanted something that was more tailored to who he was and what he wanted to do as a celebrity) 5/

While I don’t think he will be returning to the group anytime soon, I do believe perhaps there is a chance that eventually they will come back together. being apart of B1A4 is not something he can easily erase and it is where a good bit of his fans came from. He did make a lot of promises about B1A4 always being one and the like, which I’m sure is why there are fans who are still bothered or upset. But alternatively think about if he had been more realistic about everything? 6/

fans would of been bothered by that too. Maybe he shouldn’t of talked about it as much as he did and that would of made this entire situation better. All in all, I’m a BANA that is more bothered by Link8 and how they approached and handled a lot of things concerning Jinyoung more than I am at Jinyoung himself. 7/

He could of done better with how he decided to go but I don’t believe he ever wanted to flat out drop B1A4, but if anything he wanted to put some distance between that part of his career and what he wanted next. ultimately. A3 is great and all of them together is great too. I hope whoever he signs with after his enlistment is just generally better and more experienced. Not simply recycling ideas for promoting their talent. 8/

Wow, now I think this is the longest ask I’ve ever gotten! haha thanks for sharing all your thoughts~

That’s good you can distance yourself from it. Admittedly that’s probably the most ideal way to handle it, but I guess it’s easier said than done for some of us.

I agree, Baro and Jinyoung did what they thought was best for themselves. And I’ve never faulted them for that. My only critique has always been in how they left, and the pain we can see from CNU, Sandeul and Gongchan over it. But I’ve written enough posts and answered enough asks about that 😅

LINK8 has just always seemed a bit of a mess. I mean, it seemingly popped out of nowhere, and the timing of its creation and Jinyoung joining just all seemed a bit suspect. Again, I’ve talked enough about that but I’ll just say I essentially agree with your points made in your 3rd through 5th paragraphs regarding how LINK8 just was not good lol. And personal opinion, but I think a lot of how they ‘dropped the ball’ goes hand in hand with him having a more prominent role in the company, and then just not being there during public service to run it. And by ‘it’ I mean his own promotions, not necessarily the company as a whole. But who knows, he could have been helping run the company as a whole too. There’s just so much we don’t know about LINK8, and with it seemingly ceasing to exist, we’ll probably never know.

The point you make about Jinyoung talking about Bipo always being one vs. him being more realistic is something I haven’t talked about as frequently as the other things, but I did mention at least once here. Basically, I agree he was kinda in a ‘damned if he did, damned if he didn’t’ situation. I understand why he felt the need to continue on the ‘7 year curse? I don’t know her’ train despite the fact he probably already knew he was gonna be leaving. Like I get it, I really do. the Kpop world isn’t exactly the kinda place where he would have had the freedom to actually be transparent, for the sake of the fans. The only thing I can say about that is looking back, I wish he wasn’t just so intense about ‘B1A4 being one forever’... like he was mentioning it even up until their 7th anniversary VLive, a mere two months before he actually left. But I understand his reasons.

Regarding you last paragraph, “...but I don’t believe he ever wanted to flat out drop B1A4, but if anything he wanted to put some distance between that part of his career and what he wanted next” idk. I guess this is where I may have to disagree. Of course, at the end of the day all we’re doing is sharing individual opinions, we’ll never know for sure, so no one is right or wrong. But I don’t think I can truly agree with this 100%. While I don’t think someone ‘wanting distance’ is the same as ‘flat out dropping’, I do think it’s a very fine line to walk. If Jinyoung (or Baro) didn’t want to actually drop the group, then why did they leave in a way that made A3 so upset? Them leaving WM and signing to other agencies was more than enough to distance themselves, if that’s all they really wanted. However, it always seemed there was more to it than that-- Sandeul tweeting about how shocked and confused he was mere hours after the news dropped, not leaving his house for a month, Gongchan completely breaking down over it, how apologetic CNU was that he couldn’t keep them together as five, idk. This just seems more than just them leaving the company to create some distance. This to me signals it went down maybe in not the best way, that while they ‘didn’t technically leave the group’ it certainly might as well be that way for A3. This seems like a complete break to me, not just a distance.

But again, just personal opinion based on what we have seen and heard. I’m never going to say there’s no chance they won’t all get together again, just that it’ll definitely be some time. I don’t think any of them want to all get back together right now, including Baro and Jinyoung. (Obviously, if B1A4 was their top priority, then they wouldn’t have left in the first place, so this makes sense and I respect that). The best for Jinyoung though, hopefully if he is actually signing with BB Entertainment, they can give him what he’s truly searching for. And hopefully we’ll see Baro in some acting roles soon, too! I always loved his acting, so I’ll be looking forward to that~

Thanks for sharing all your thoughts again, I appreciate you taking the time to do so.

#b1a4 #cnu #sandeul #gongchan #shindeulchan #jinyoung #baro #wm entertainment #link 8 entertainment #bb entertainment #text #ask #reply

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lilmissbeanie · 4 years

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Keiji Akaashi x Famous!F!Reader

Song ~ Ass Back Home - Gym Class Heroes

Genre ~ SFW Fluff

Word Count ~ 1.8k

Posted ~ 11/08/20

Akaashi sighed as he once again read another article about Y/n L/n and Jason Derulo, or some other artist always presuming that they were together. He didn't want to be jealous, but he couldn't help it when he saw his girl with some other guys, wasn't that normal?

He knew it was going to be hard when he asked her to be his girlfriend. He knew she would be away often she would be travelling for tours and of course, meeting up with other artists to collaborate on songs, even though he knew that her new song would be a collaboration with Jason Derulo.

He trusted her, the same way that Bokuto would trust his sets back in high school, the way that Bokuto would always know that Akaashi would always get the ball to him to spike. He knew she would never cheat on him, that wasn't who she was. He knew by the excitement in her voice when he answered the phone, "Kei!" The excitable giggles paired with the massive happy grin he saw on video call on the rare occasions that she could. Usually, it was voice messages or texts with the time difference, but some times she would stay up late so they could video chat, he would let the small smile grace his features when she would rub her eyes cutely and yawn. The way he would tell her to go to bed cause she is tired and she would pout innocently saying that she wasn't worn out. She would ask about his day listening as she slowly doses off, he didn't take it as an insult he just knew she was exhausted. He would sit there smiling at her sleeping face, looking like an innocent child, where she still had her phone in a light grip facing her.

"Good night, my Juliette sleep well. I love you."

"I... l-love you too my Romeo" would often be mumbled back, in her half-dazed state. With Akaashi's love of literature, Y/n just slipped it out once called him her Romeo and ever since it stuck.

Running his finger around the rim of his glass he sighed, it had been a few days since he had heard from her, he knew she was busy he had seen on her Twitter and Instagram that they added more tour dates in America as they stadiums had sold out. It had been eight months since the pair were actually in person together.

"AKAASHI!" He flinched at Bokuto's sudden loudness as said boy appeared next to him. "Why so, mopey? Oh, you're missing Y/n aren't you!"

"Hey my Romeo, I'm sorry I haven't called or texted you in a while, the tour has gotten so hectic recently we are doing two shows a day, so most of my fans can come, and watch and my manager wants to add even more dates." He smiled, enjoying the sound of her voice even if it is over voicemail, and she sounded exhausted. He had woken up for work and seen that he had missed a call from her at three am. "I know you're going to ask when I am going to be home, but I don't know at the moment, but soon I hope I'm going to tell my manager that I need a break. I hope to be home for Christmas."

Rolling his eyes, he shrugged and gave a slight nod to Bokuto's question.

Bokuto suddenly felt terrible for Akaashi. He didn't know how he felt. He didn't have a love like Akaashi. His passion is for Volleyball is his true love right now. He remembered the day he introduced Akaashi and Y/n. She was at an after-party of a game that the Black Jackals won and Bokuto dragged Akaashi along. It was like the couple connected instantly and they soon got together. Bokuto would often turn up at Akaashi's find them sprawled out on the sofa, Y/n with her head in his lap, his fingers running through he hair as he read a book to her. Bokuto had gotten many pictures of them like this. He loved how relaxed Akaashi was around her, a way he hadn't seen with anyone else.

He knew that she was going to say that.

"Anyway I miss you my Romeo, I cannot wait to be home and in your arms again. I want to be in our little bubble of love and cuddles, of you reading to me while you play with my hair. I want to be in the studio with you listening to me sing my new songs and telling me which words would work better with the lyrics I have written." He laughed he did often sit in the studio with her after he finishes work, reading over her new lyrics and crossing out the odd word and putting one that worked better with the theme of the song. He loved watching her pick at the strings of her acoustic guitar playing a few cords and seeing if they worked when she ran her fingers over the keys of the piano. He loved that she could play different instruments.

"I love you so much, Romeo. I hope you sleep well. See you as soon as I can. Bye-bye, my sweet Romeo."

About three weeks later he was sat at his desk eating his lunch, watch the recent interview Y/n had with OK! Magazine.

'So Y/n, when the tour is over what is the first thing you're going to do?' Chloe, the interviewer, asked

'I think it will be sleep we've had some busy months recently, most days doing two shows to it is hard work.' He laughed along with his beloved.

'We've been keeping up to date on your social media, who is this Romeo you keep mentioning, we often see and I quote, I miss you my sweet Romeo, or I love you, Romeo.' He would always reply, but his account was private so no one unless they followed him and accepted it.

'My Romeo is waiting for me at home; I promised him I wouldn't mention him until he is ready for the spotlight as he isn't an actor or musician. But he is my Romeo, and I am very excited to get home and be with him again.' He was so glad that she didn't spill the beans about their relationship. He already had enough of the spotlight with being friends with most of the Black Jackals team, he already has his pictures in magazines when the team goes out, and he gets dragged along with Kuroo by Bukoto and Hinata.

'Can you tell us one thing about him?' Chloe pushed for more details about him. He loved how Y/n's nose would scrunch up, and her left eyebrow would shoot up as he tapped her chin in thought.

'He was a volleyball setter in high school.' She smiled. Akaashi smirked at the fact she gave, there were many setters across the world, and narrowing down to him would be hard. 'And he is my bookworm,'

'A setter and bookworm, those don't often go together!' Chloe laughed, with Y/n soon joining her.

'I know, and I have Shoyo Hinata and Kotaro Bokuto. But honestly, if it wasn't for him I'm sure some of my songs wouldn't make sense, a lot of my lyrics in my book have his scribbles in changing the odd word here and there, I would often wake up finding him hovering over my lyrics book a mug of coffee in hand proofreading them for me.'

He couldn't help the chuckle that slipped past his lips at the dig at Bokuto and Hinata's dislike for books.

'He sound's like a gem! But back to the fact you've met the Black Jackals numbers twenty-one and thirteen. What are they like?"

"I've met them all I know all the Black Jackals, all their school friends too, I met them all after a match against the Cheehle Ekaterinburg, an old friend Morisuke Yaku I knew from my middle school days invited me along, and that was where I met them. Those two boys even though they were bouncing around the court like anything they still had so much energy, I was shocked that anyone could keep up with them, it was like they were children who had just walked out of an all you can eat sweetshop.'

This caused Chloe to giggle. He liked the way Y/n slyly slipped in how they met.

'this Romeo of yours you didn't happen to meet him through your old middle school friend, did you? At this party' Akaashi's eyes widen as the interviewer hit the nail on the head, he was impressed at how Y/n kept her facial expression in check, just the usual smile she used for interviews,

Saturday 5th of December 2015 was the day that Y/n finally returned home. She didn't tell Akaashi she was on her, she knew from Bokuto that they would be at his favourite restaurant that serves his favourite food, Nanohana no Karashiae, in a private room at the back. She drove her car into the car park of the restaurant, taking a deep breath she pulled on her cap and her dark sunglasses as she got out and walked into the restaurant, telling the waiter that she was here for the Bokuto party he nodded and showed her to the door.

'Ah, well it was through mutual friends that we met.' He loved how she deflected the question, not letting them on that it was at the party they met.

He leaned his phone against the pen pot on his desk, leaving the video to play, while he got on with his work, the questions had now turned to make-up and what shampoo she was using.

"Thanks, I'll be fine from here." She knew from the photo that Bokuto had put up on Twitter that Akaashi had his back to the door, purposely done for this exact reason. Pulling off the hat and glasses, she quietly opened the door slipping in and once again quietly shutting it. The room slowly went quiet as eyes suddenly locked on to her figure. Akaashi frowned at his friends, why did everyone stop talking all of a sudden and why Bokuto and Kuroo had whipped out their phones, pointing it at him, till he started to follow their line of sight.

"Happy birthday Romeo." She giggled as he slowly placed her back on the floor, their foreheads resting against one another.

"I'm home, my Romeo." His eyes instantly locked with hers the second he heard her voice, as the smiles so wide crossed their faces as he flew out of his seat wrapping her up in his arms, tightly as if he loosen his grip she would disappear again, he spun her around. He was ecstatic she was home.

Nine months, eleven days, sixteen hours and thirty-eight minutes since the last time he held her in his arms. Since he lasted kissed her. Since he last looked into her beautiful deep e/c eyes.

"You are the best birthday present I could ever ask for." He said as he entwined his fingers into her hair, pulling her into a deep kiss that was long overdue.

©️ All content belongs to lilmissbeanie, do not copy, edit, repost or translate.

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possiamo-andare · 4 years

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No More Divisions - Chapter Six: The Key

JJ x Original Character

you guys are really gonna like this one...

MASTERLIST

You've ever had that moment in life where you've forgotten something so important that you feel physical pain once you've remembered? If you have, you know exactly what I mean.

A couple months ago, Sarah and I were planning to hang out and I wanted to sleep over. I had packed everything the night before to make sure I didn't forget anything. I had made a list for the first time in forever and I double checked before I left. Yet, once I got to Sarah's house I remembered one thing I forgot. Something I didn't even think to put on the list. Pads. I had gotten my period that night and I had to go looking through Sarah's bathroom cabinet to find a pad like a raccoon. Once I realize I had forgotten it, this awful feeling of dread came over me because I knew I messed up.

I hate that feeling.

When we get to the dock, I got that same feeling. I realized we forgot something; the key. Like idiots, we forgot the thing that starts the damm boat. I swear to god sometimes I think we all share one brain cell.

Although I remember this key piece of information, I don't let them know until the boat is in the water. Once the boat is in the water, I finally decide to break the news to them.

"Wow, guys," Pope chuckled, looking at all of us. "With twenty minutes to spare."

JJ and Kiara are smiling with Pope and I'm expecting a group hug but I know I'm gonna have to rain on their parade.

"Um, guys," I clear my throat. They're all joking around and fist bumping each other and I'm just watching. I kinda feel bad. "There's one problem."

They all look to me, waiting for me to be a little more precise. They all move closer to me and I look to JJ, who is as clueless as a snail.

"What?" He asks me, clearly being able to see that I'm pissed.

"How the hell is John B. gonna be able to start the car without the key?"

I don't think I've seen Kiara get so mad at JJ so quickly. They always have their mini fights here and there but this time she's pissed. "You forgot the key?!"

JJ rolls his eyes. "Sorry Kie, I was a bit distracted by the crazy Kooks trying to kill us all day!"

I want to step in and try to mediate since the both have reasons to be upset but I look to Pope for reassurance and he looks to me and shakes his head. Apparently getting between Kiara and JJ was a bad idea. So, I stay silent along with Pope as Kiara and JJ battle it out.

"I gave you two small tasks. I even wrote them down!" Kiara raises her voice, her hands coming up to her face to rub her temples.

JJ smirks. "Chill Kie, I gotta plan."

Kiara rolls her eyes. "Great. You've got a plan. Ya hear that guys, JJ has a plan. Well, that makes me feel better." Kiara's voice is filled with sarcasm and JJ knows it.

JJ let's out a loud sigh before turning to me. "Callie, you're gonna help me."

I frown. "Why do you always pick me when we have to get in trouble?"

"Because he -" Pope begins to say before Kiara elbows him.

JJ glares at Pope for a second before looking back at me. "Who says we're doing anything dangerous?"

I roll my eyes. "Fine, then what are we doing?"

JJ scratches his head. "We're gonna..." He looks to his house for a moment then back to me.

Then, it clicks. "No." I glare at JJ. "I'm not gonna steal the key from your dad."

"Yeah. If he wakes up, he'll kill you guys." Kiara pipes in, patting my shoulder.

JJ shook his head quickly. "Callie." Once he says my name, my eyes instantly meet his. He grabs me by the shoulders and pulls me closer to him. "Nothing will happen to you. I promise."

He's so serious and calm as he says this I can't help but believe him. Last week I wouldn't have trusted JJ with anything, let alone my life but now it's different. I feel something for JJ. Something I don't have time to figure out just yet.

I nod. "Okay. What's the plan?"

"You're a psycho." I angrily whisper to JJ. I can't speak normally because I'm in his house and of I talk normally, his dad will wake up.

He's just told me his plan to get the key and now I'm sure we'll die. The key is on a chain hanging around his father's neck and the only way JJ can think of to get it off is to cut the chain. Not only is this a bad idea, it will get us killed. If either of us makes one wrong move, then JJ's dad will wake up and see what we're doing. Then I can only imagine the suffering I'll endure.

"My dad can sleep through a tornado. He won't even know we're here." JJ shrugs, totally nonchalant about the hibernating bear on his couch.

I take a deep breath. "Fine. Let's just do this."

I tiptoe behind JJ as we make our to the couch where his dad is sleeping. As I move around his cluttered house, I'm surprised. Of course, I never expected his living quarters to be four stars, but at least one would make me happy. No wonder JJ rarely goes home. Not the mention the mean man waiting for him each time he gets home.

The house is a complete mess and from what I can tell, it's mostly at the fault of his father, not JJ. There's empty beer bottles and spare parts. Two things JJ would never bring home, let alone scatter all over his house. It's obvious his dad has never cleaned up after himself which just angers me. Not only does he beat his son, he is beyond ok with letting his son live in these conditions. Maybe I do want him to wake up, so I can beat the shit out of him.

Once we get close enough to JJ's dad, JJ looks to me and extends his hand outward. I take the scissors that I found on the boat from my pocket and give them to JJ. He slowly reaches for them, careful not to even make a creak. I can't even tell if JJ and I are breathing because that's how quiet we are trying to be.

Once JJ grabs ahold of the scissors, he moves closer to his dad's face. This time I'm sure JJ and I aren't breathing. The only loud thing I can hear is my heartbeat which is beating so loud I'm sure it's gonna wake up JJ's dad any minute. I try to take small breaths through my nose and try to stay calm but that proves to be difficult because I watch JJ pick the chain with the key up with his index finger and slowly bring the scissors to the chain.

He slowly but surely slides the blades down on the chain and they make a small sound, definitely not loud enough for his dad to hear. JJ tries again. He reopens the blades and then closes them again, this time they sound even louder. Yet again, the scissors aren't strong enough to cut the chain.

JJ slowly places the chain back on his father's chest and turns to me, scissors still in hand. His brows are scrunched together and I know this means he has an idea. And if I know JJ, it's a stupid idea.

I raise my eyebrows at him. What is he planning. He shifts a little to the right and places the scissors on the table in front of the couch where his father sleeps. There's barely any room on the table with all the junk but he makes room. He then looks back to me and smirks.

I have no idea what he's about to do. Then, he turns back to his dad and does it. He grabs onto the chain with his entire hand and rips it off his dad's neck in a second, breaking the clasp.

I wanna scream at him. I'm wanna punch him. Although I want to, I can't because JJ's dad grumbles, waking up from his deep sleep.

JJ grabs my hand and quickly pushes me into his kitchen and under the table, away from his dad's eyeline. We're both so damn quiet, I'm sure we're not breathing again.

Since we're under the table, we can't see JJ's dad but we can hear him. He wakes up and gets up from the couch. He stretches and wakes closer to the kitchen.

JJ squeezes onto my hand. I forgot that we're still holding hands. I squeeze back and look at him. He gives me a half smile but I know he's terrified.

Just as I think JJ's dad is gonna walk into the kitchen, he passes it completely and makes his way to the bathroom, shutting the door behind him.

I let out a sigh. "Holy shit."

JJ let's go of my hand. "I thought we were dead."

I scowled. "Yeah we almost did, you ass. Why'd you do that?"

JJ shrugged, smiling at me in a way I can't explain. "I got the key, didn't I?"

I smirked, not being able to contain my happiness. "Sure. But seriously, next time I'm planning -"

I can't even reprimand JJ anymore because he's cuped my face in his hands and is kissing me. JJ is kissing me. It takes me a moment to realize what's going on and at first I'm not kissing him back. My body is limp because I'm in total shock.

I think he gets scared of my reaction because he let's me go and starts apologizing. "Callie, I'm so fucking sorry. I'm really -"

And now im kissing him. Both of my arms wrap around his neck and I dive forward to kiss him. These emotions have been building up since last night and now I'm finally expressing them. Once JJ reacts to me kissing him, he's kissing me back fiercely. His hands are my waist, pulling my upper body closer to him. We're crouched down under this stupid table but I'm having the time of my life. I've never kissed anyone like this.

He tastes like mint gum which I didn't think he would taste like, especially since I haven't seen him chew any gum since I met him. I wonder what I taste like to him.

We hear the toilet flush. This is what makes us pull apart. JJ's dad will be out any second and we haven't left yet.

We scurry out from under the table and JJ helps me up from the ground.

With his hand in mine, we run out of his dad's front door. We cut across the side of his house and run across his backyard. We pass the jacuzzi which is now drained. I can't believe that not even 24 hours ago I was having my first real conversation with JJ and now I'm running hand in hand with him. A lot can change in one day.

Once we make it to the dock, we see Kiara and Pope sitting on the ledge waiting for us. Once our steps are heard on the dock, Kiara looks up at us and smiles.

"You got it?"

Kiara and Pope both stand up once we get closer to them. JJ takes the key, still dangling on the chain, and holds it in front of Kiara and Pope.

"Told you I got it." He hands it to Kiara.

Kiara has the biggest grin on her face. "I always believed in you man."

"Bullshit." JJ laughs, looking to me.

That's when I realize our hands are still interlocked. Embarrassed, I let go and move slightly away from JJ, giving him space. He frowns at me and suppress a smile. Everything he does makes me laugh. If this is what liking someone feels like then I don't think I ever liked Rafe.

Once Kiara puts the key I'm her pocket, she extends her arms, ready for a group hug. We all extend our arms with her and all hug. We're yelling and screaming, joking about how crazy this day has been. I've never felt so appreciated, so loved by anyone in my entire life.

I understand why being a Pogue is so awesome. Being a Kook, there's not much room for community and family but here, I feel like we're our own little family. A week ago I would've never understood why Sarah loved hanging out with John B. and his friends but now I do.

Now I do.

I look up from our group hug and JJ is watching me. I smile at him and he winks at me.

I want to roll my eyes but I don't. I just watch him as he watches me. We're in the moment and I don't think I've ever felt as alive as I do now.

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yuvon-writes-letters · 3 years

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Yuvon (and Jake),

I'm actually glad you understand my suspicions and still, I think you convinced me to trust you for now. Maybe that goes both ways.

So, helping each other with those weird situations over letters, hm?

I never would've dreamed of my life becoming this...messed up? Weird? Crazy? But hey, at least it is not boring.

Yes, I was saying the stuff with the chinese food (which I really cooked btw) because of the motel room :)

So, four hours only...But that's something we could have expected: Different universes (as far as we know), different 'time zones' if you wanna call it like that.

Jake didn't I still was not able to reach my Jake, but I took a closer look on the picture. Sadly I didn't find anything. In the moment I'll stay where I am, I don't want to leave my home, but I hope I'll find a way to contact the Crow-Crew soon. Or maybe what (or who) ever is responsible for the stasis desides to 'help' me a bit. The thought of the MWAF (at least that's what I think) being out of the stasis with me is not really calming. I am also thinking about calling other people I know from Duskwood, or had contact with. Maybe Alan, Darkness or even Phil in prison. I have to figure out with whom I can stay in contact.

To help you, maybe you can figure out a bit more of where you are and maybe why you're there? You said something of a library and game room, also a comfy room. Is there something, anything that could give you hints?

Or is there something you haven't talked about yet that you know which could give more hints on your situation? Everything could help you now (even though going or plotting against an entity would be rather difficult) [a little figure that seems to think really hard is sketched next to the sentence]

So yeah, I think that's it for now. Maybe Rai will answer again soon, then we'd be three people :)

Stay safe Yuron, and Jake too!

[Jakes red eye is drawn here]

Liska🐾🔥

Liska,

I'm inclined to at least give SOME trust to anyone who gets these letters, since I'm 99% sure everyone who gets these is an alternate amateur investigator in the exact same position as I was in before being drawn here. You saw me talking about the parallel universe theory with Rai, right? My opinion there still stands. Maybe it's a bit naive, but the shared circumstances make me trust y'all more off the bat.

Yep, we might be trapped in cosmic horror stories, but no one could ever say this is boring XD

I was hoping not to deal with time bullshit. I was so happy when I learned that Rai and I's universes ran on the same time. Guess I shouldn't have gotten my hopes up XD Still, yeah, I really should've expected it.

Calling them would be an interesting idea. However, calling Phil might be difficult, and calling Alan may or may not cause issues; hard to tell with what we know so far. Sounds like Darkness is your best shot, at least in my opinion. (The writing here grows a little shaky.) I think that

Sorry, I started laughing and my lines started going crazy. I can’t ever NOT find Darkness hilarious, he reminds me of me when I was in my edgy phase. Anyhow, you’re probably going to need some type of pretext for talking to him, unless you want to frame it as just striking up a conversation. Maybe send him that picture of the MWAF’s mask you just got and ask him if it’s the one from the legend? You’ve come to him for info on the MWAF before, it probably won’t come off as an odd question.

I mean, odd for reasons other than you being sent a photo of the MWAF’s mask. Whatever, you get what I mean.

As for the rooms: there’s been something I’ve been obsessing over for a while, now, but I haven’t been able to get anywhere with it. I don’t know how much you know about video games, but for purposes of what I’m talking about, there’s basically three types: Singleplayer games are self-explanatory, and I have more than a few in the game room. Multiplayer games, on the other hand, come in two variants. There are ONLINE multiplayer games, where you play with random people on the internet. I have none of those, which is probably not surprising given all my other restrictions.

What I DO have are what are called LOCAL multiplayer games. These games are basically meant to be played by someone in the same room as you, on the same console (I’m usually a PC gamer but local multiplayer is generally a console thing.) There are also board games (multiplayer!) and even some DnD handbooks!

What’s most interesting to me, though, is that almost everything so far has been tailored to my interests. Books are all genres I enjoy, games are all genres I enjoy, etc etc. But buried under some other stuff is a chessboard. I’m AWFUL at chess and generally avoid playing it to avoid humiliating myself.

So something’s definitely up with that, though I’m not entirely sure what.

(Blacked out) (Blacked out harshly) (Blacked out) fe No, nothing of particular note I haven’t said yet. There’s those three rooms to the “south”, “east”, and “west”. There’s infinite paper. Whenever I get out of here I’m gonna get hit with a fine for littering XD I have a pen that doesn’t run out of ink, a pencil that doesn’t seem to get dull, a paper clip with all the letters I’ve gotten or sent so far, and my malfunctioning phone which doesn’t run out of charge.

For a rehash of the rules I’ve learned of this place: I don’t need to eat or drink. I don’t get injuries. Nothing can pass through the invisible barrier. The trees are pass-through-able if there’s a room on the other side. I am not allowed to contact anybody not somehow related to the Duskwood case. Unless I take action to spur them on first, the Crow Crew remains in stasis except for on landmark days like Father’s Day. (Jake is no longer in stasis, exactly, but he can’t get anything new on the case either. He considers it a variation on the stasis.)

:) Yeah, hope Rai’s doing okay. They probably just had something come up in their life, and that’s why they haven’t written for a little bit. Or maybe they moved and the entity keeping me here didn’t update the address XD

Jake wants to try to figure out if there’s a “conversion rate” for time between our universes. I suspect there isn’t a conversion rate, but it’d be good to figure out one way or the other. We’re taking notes on the approximate times we get your letters and send ours back to you. Your letter was received about 12 hours after I sent the last letter, and I’m sending this one somewhere about about 2 hours after I got yours.

Jake highly recommends you don’t call Alan. And while he personally doesn’t mind if you call Phil, he says that based on his own previous behavior, your Jake might not be too happy about it XD

He also suggests that maybe the reason my letters sent so oddly in the first place (introductory, then all the others at once,) had something to do with the time bullshit. Seems possible, I guess, but that might imply your stasis doesn’t have anything to do with my stasis; I figure if my entity was the one doing your stasis it could bypass the stasis to deliver the letters.

Speaking of stasis: I know it’s dangerous, and I know you’d be breaking your promise... but what would happen if you physically went to Duskwood? Probably too bad of an idea to actually try unless you get really desperate, but it’s something to think about.

You be safe too, Lis :)

—Yuvon and Jake

(The letter tucks itself into the paper clip with the others.)

#duskwood letter game #yuvon writes letters #duskwood #duskwood game #duskwood everbyte #duskwood ep8 spoilers #lis

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babieyangyang10 · 4 years

Text

violent ends (chapter 10)

(chapter 10)

series masterlist

genre: hunger games!au

pairings: huang renjun x oc, na jaemin x oc

warnings: language, mentions of injuries, mentions of sex, fighting, and death (so sorry for this one)

previous | next

Jaemin's POV

"Athena, run!" I yell, before my feet start moving. Flames rip at my skin as I pass more and more trees.

However, I don't get far, before I'm colliding with something hard. I grunt falling down to the ground.

"Jisung!" That something was Mark Lee. We stare at each other with wide eyes.

"Hyung, I don't think that's Jisung." Chenle trails off. I crawl backwards, trident no where to be found.

"Athena, get-" I turn around for help, to be met with just trees behind me, "Wait, where'd she go?"

"Who?"

I explain, still breathing heavily, "Lee Athena, she was right behind me. I guess we must have gotten separated."

"We're looking for a kid named Jisung. Blond hair. Kinda skinny. This tall." Chenle gestures his height above his head.

"I haven't seen him," I realize that not only do I not have Athena, but I also don't have any weapons or supplies, "Oh fuck, what am I going to do now?”

"Well, they should be close by. Maybe we could look together!" Chenle suggests.

"Chenle, he's dangerous." Mark spits at the younger boy.

"Yeah, with no weapons or even anything on him. Real dangerous," Chenle rolls his eyes, "Besides, even if he wanted to kill us, he would've tried by now."

I hate to say it, but I am desperate. I literally have nothing. If I disagree with Chenle, Mark Lee will definitely kill me right here.

I began pleading with him. "Listen, I need to find her," I pause, "she's just really important to me. I'll even help you find the kid."

A look of pity appears on Mark's face. "Fine, but we're splitting up and Chenle," He looks to the boy, "you're going to be the one who stays with him. Always keep your weapon ready. Meet me back at camp at sunset."

"Thank you, Mark." I breath out, truly grateful.

“I’m going to be looking in the direction of our camp to see if they’re in that area. The two of you will check around here.” He heads off towards the direction of the Lake.

Meanwhile, Chenle and I begin in the opposite direction. We decided to try to retrace our steps and try to find tracks where we last saw them.

As time passes, I feel my chest sink more and more. How could I be so stupid to lose her like that? Although, I haven’t heard any cannons. That’s good, right?

“So, what’s the deal with you two? Is it really real?” Chenle asks about the girl on my mind.

I hum, “I think so. I meant what I said.” It was the truth, even if the cameras are on me now.

“Ooh, love at first sight!” He teases in a high-pitched voice.

Laughing, I respond with, “So, how did the three of you decide to team up?”

“Mark was the one who asked us. Jisung and I were really surprised,” He furrowed his brows, “Like, why would this strong guy want to team up with us, the smallest tributes? I guess it was because we’re all in the lower districts and grew up very similar.”

Before I can respond, I hear the sound of laughing. “Careers!” I point, “Let’s hide in that tree.”

Grabbing on to a high branch, I pull myself up first. Chenle goes to do the same, but the branch snaps, causing him to fall to the ground.

“Look!” The Careers have spotted us.

Leaning down, I hold out my hand. I pull him up only just before they stop at the trunk of the tree.

“Haechan, go get them.” Lee Jeno barks at the man.

Haechan tries to climb the tree, but only falls down. Since the branch snapped, there’s no way he’ll be able to grab on to anything.

“I can’t. There’s no way!” He yells, frustrated. I can hear Chenle snickering from beside me.

However, no one laughs at Huang Renjun’s next harsh words, “Use your bow then.”

Chenle turns to me with fear in his eyes. Looking above, there’s no where else for us to climb. The two of us can’t take the three of them with just Chenle’s knife.

The District 1 tribute reaches back into his pouch on his back to load his bow. We wait in silence, until his hand comes out empty, “I forgot it at the Cornocopia.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Jeno looks furious, “Go get them, before I slit your neck open while your family watches on tv.”

Haechan, looking close to tears, begins towards the Cornocopia. Meanwhile, Jeno suddenly makes an observation, “Hey lover boy, where’s your girlfriend?”

Striking a nerve in me, I spit, “That’s none of your business.” I notice that it was starting to get dark. Mark should be waiting for us at the camp.

“Did she finally decide to ditch you?” I look down to see Renjun, looking intensely up at me.

“No.” I deny. Seeing that Chenle is rummaging around the tree, I try to distract the two of them.

“Why, are you missing her too much?” I direct it towards Renjun. Jeno, intrigued by my comment, turns to observe his ally’s reaction.

“Nope. Why would make you say that?” He pretends to be unaffected. Although, for a second, I swore I could see a hint of anger in his eyes.

“Oh, come on,” I narrow my eyes, “Don’t tell me you’ve never had a soft spot for Lee Athena. You grew up together didn’t you? Always competed with the other in school.”

“Really?” Jeno says, taking in my words.

“Yep, she told me all about it.” I laugh dryly to myself.

Renjun just pauses, he looks up at me with dark eyes before simply asking, “Did she tell you what happened the night before the first day of the games as well?”

Before anyone else can speak, a cannon goes off in the distance.

Athena’s POV

"I need to find Mark and Chenle. Could you help me back to our camp?" Jisung suggests after we finish eating the crackers from my bag.

That was easier said than done. Judging by both our conditions, we wouldn't make it far. Not to mention, how do I know I wouldn't be killed on sight by Mark Lee if I returned him?

Before I can answer, however, I hear the sound of beeping. From the sky, a little crate is falling from a parachute. A sponsor!

I catch it in my hands, quickly opening it. I first spot a piece of paper. The writing says, “heal up, hero.—T.”

Taeyong.

“Thank you for the sponsorship.” I gratefully say to the camera, before pulling out the jar inside. It contains a gooey substance, which I’m presuming is for our burns.

“Okay, Jisung. This might sting a little.” I warn, before crouching down. I apply the cream over his leg. His doe-eyes open wide, while he whimpers softly in pain.

Quickly, I notice the burnt skin on my hand where the cream had touch was now completely healed. I applied more to my other hand. Now, I can actually hold a weapon again. I also put in on my leg, feeling the pain ease away.

I feel as good as new. However, while Jisung’s skin is looking extremely better on his wound, he still is unable to walk. Because of this, I add another layer of cream for now.

“Okay, so your base is across the lake, take a left at the tree stump, then go straight?” I ask, while he eagerly nods.

“Well, I’m going to bring them back to you, since you can’t come to them. I’ll leave you with a knife. I wonder if there’s a way you could warn me of danger?” I ask myself.

“Well, back in eleven, we have this little signal.” He whistles a four-note melody, which causes mockingjays to sing it back to him.

“How about every now and then you whistle to check in on me? If you don’t hear it back from the mockingjays, then somethings gone wrong.” Jisung explains.

Once giving him a spare knife, I grab my things and begin following the stream upwards. Like we agreed, I would whistle and listen as the mockingjays would echo. Whenever I would hear it return, I couldn’t help but let out a little smile.

The stream eventually leads me to the lake, where I cross. I follow the directions Jisung gave me until I am met with a small shack of sticks.

“Athena?”

I throw my knife, which lands just centimeters away from Mark Lee’s head.

“Woah, I come in peace!” He holds up his weapon-less hands.

Breathing heavily, I apologize, “Sorry, but Jisung told me to find you. He’s injured. I left him by a pond, come follow me.”

Before we went, I whistled once more to Jisung. I waited and was met with the sound of silence. Even after trying again, there was still nothing.

“Something’s wrong!” I cried.

We began running, the water from the lake and stream, soaking us. However, all we cared about was Jisung. As I neared the pond, I could hear the sounds of excessive splashing.

Turning the corner, I am met with the sight of Haechan holding a struggling Jisung under the water. Hands flailing, he is trying to free himself, while Haechan is killing him slowly.

There was no hesitation. No guilt.

When the knife went flying from my hand, straight into Haechan’s left eye.

#nct dream smut #nct smut #nct dream #nct dream imagines #nct series #nct au #renjun #jaemin #jeno #haechan #mark lee #chenle #jisung #nct

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girlwithshipsshitshow · 4 years

Conversation

Part 11

Misaki: (Runs hands through his hair) Sorry Takahiro, I was going to call you, but i've been a little preoccupied with my fiance here..

Takahiro: I had to hear it from this guy (Taps Isaka's chest) Luckily he didn't sound worried so...

Takahiro, Isaka: Wait did you just say Fiance?

Misaki: Oh yeah, we got engaged saturday.

Isaka: (Walks over to Usagi, salps usagi on the shoulder who groans in pain) Congrats man, you finally asked him!

Usagi: (Raspy voice) Uh, actually Misaki asked me, and please don't hit me I just has surgery.

Takahiro: Are you okay Usagi-san?

Usagi: I'm fine

Takahiro: (Walks over to Misaki and Usagi) So, you guys are getting married?

Misaki: Yes, Yeah we are.

Takahiro: We'll congrats.

Misaki: Yeah, you don't seem so happy about it.

Takahiro: I haven't even gotten used to the idea of you guys dating and now you're engaged?

Misaki: Yeah, we'll my plan was to propose after we told you and before I graduated, so I don't really care if you've gotten used to it, we've been dating for years without you knowing and now that you know we can fully be happy, and if i'm sorry if you can't get on board.

Takahiro: I can, I just need time to processes all this.

Misaki: We'll right now, we need to focus on Usagi, so this conversation isn't happening right now.

Takahiro: (Nods walks over to the sofa and sits down beside Aikawa).

Isaka: Well I'm happy for you. (Smiles awkwardly, and goes to sit on the sofa).

(Nurse Rose walks in and smiles at Aikawa causing her to blush, she sits on the arm of the sofa causing her to blush more, her heart was beating out of her chest, hopefully no one could hear it.)

Nurse rose: Looks like we have a full house.

Misaki: Yeah, my brother Takahiro is beside Aikawa, and beside him is the senior manager at the publishing company where Usagi's work is published, his name is Isaka.

Takahiro, Isaka: Hello.

Nurse Rose: So how is everyone doing? Usagi the cafe is about to close so if you want anything to eat you should place and order now, otherwise I can get you some liquid broth and tea from up here.

Usagi: I'll just take whatever's up here.

Nurse Rose: Sure, the four of you should probably go grab some food.

Misaki: I want to stay here

Usagi: No, you need to eat.

Misaki: (Sighs)

Usagi: I'll be fine for an hour, I promise.

Isaka: (Stands up, walks over to Misaki, Placing a comforting hand on his shoulder), Come on Misaki, he'll be okay.

Misaki: (Stands up) Okay (Softly places hand on Usagi's cheek and and leans down to kiss him, he softly whispers "I love you" against his lips, before giving him another kiss.

Nurse Rose: Okay, so I can take you guys up to the cafe, (confused look) It's on the fivthteen floor for some reason, never understood that, shall we go everyone?

Misaki, Isaka, Takahiro, and Aikawa: (All follow Nurse rose out of the room, and onto the elevator).

Nurse Rose: Alright fun ride! I'm on my break before going into my night shift, do you guys mind if I eat with you?

Misaki: (gently nudges Aikawa)

Aikawa: (Slants eyebrows and mouths "what")

Misaki: (Nods at her)

Aikawa: Um, Nurse Rose?

Nurse Rose: (Smiles) I'm on break, you can just call me Rose.

Aikawa: (Blushes). Um you can join us for dinner.

Nurse Rose: Oh, that's cool! Thanks. I want to get to know you more.

Aikawa: (Clears throat) Uh, a- all- all of us.

(Elevator dings, they all get off following nurse rose to the cafe, They all get a large plate of shrimp tempura to share, and chicken broth, options were limited, since it was late and the cafe would be closing soon. Isaka, and Takahiro followed Nurse Rose to a table in the far corner of the restaurant, while Misaki and Aikawa trailed behind.

Aikawa: When she said she wants to get to know you, she meant all of us right?

Misaki: (Laughs) No, she wants to get to know YOU.

Aikawa: What does that mean?

Misaki: It means she likes you.

Aikawa: So you're engaged and suddenly you're the relationships expert? Isn't Usagi your first relationship?

Misaki: (Scuffs) And how many relationships have you been in?

(They approach the table, Nurse rose grins at Aikawa)

Misaki: See she's smiling at you.

Aikawa: No, she's Being friendly

Nurse Rose: Aikawa, I saved you a seat. (Pats the seat)

Misaki: See, (Walks over and sits beside Isaka.

Isaka: CHIBI!! (Throws arms around Misaki)

Misaki: What!?

Isaka: What's happening, how are you handling this?

Misaki: (Takes a bite of the shrimp). As well as I can be

Isaka: Good, so tell me , what's going on with those two?

(Across the table)

Rose: So how long have you known Akihiko?

Aikawa: Oh many years, he's a pain in the ass, but he's a good guys, he's like my brother.

Rose: So you've never had any sort of feelings for him?

Aikawa: (Snorts) Oh god no! He's never been into girls and the one person he's "loved" before Misaki didn't feel that way about him. Misaki's the love of his life.

Rose: (Touches Aikawa's hand) And what about you?

Aikawa: (Blushes) What about me?

Rose: (Chuckles) You ever been in love.

Aikawa: I'm in love with my Job.

Rose: Ah, one of those people.

Aikawa: One of what people?

Rose: Your life is your job and you never dedicate anytime to yourself, or anything else.

Aikawa: That-

Rose: Not true?

Aikwawa: (blushes) I need to make some time for myself?

Rose: How about tomorrow?

Aikawa: Tomorrow?

Rose: I get off at 5, we can get dinner?

Aikawa: I-

Isaka, Misaki: SAY YES!

Rose: (laughs)

Aikawa: Um, Yes!

Rose: Okay, cool. Um can I get your number?

Aikawa: Oh, um sure. (takes phone out of pocket, the two exchange numbers), Um you can call me Eri.

Isaka: Whoa! You never let anyone call you by your first name.

Aikawa: Isaka, hush.

Rose: (Laughs, we should probably head back, Im sure Akihiko is hungry, and it's almost seven so visiting hours are almost over, everyone has to head home. Except you Misaki, legally you can stay.

Isaka: What, why does he get to stay.

Rose: (Raises eyebrows),Misaki's his fiance.Don't worry the rest of you can come back at six am. Anyway we should get going, you have thirty minutes to say goodnight to your friend, and Misaki I can bring some sheets and a warm cover up so you can fix up the sofa, it pulls out into a bed.

Misaki: Thank you Nurse Rose.

(Misaki sat with his arms crossed and a foot up in the chair,he watched as Nurse rose fixed the sofa for him,she was smiling and humming, apparently she was happy about her date with Aikaw,it was around seven-thirty and everyone had already left, Usagi flipped through the tv channels and sipped on a third cup of tea, his seaced IV bag had been replaced when they came back upstairs and he had his second round of antibiotics, his vitals were still looking good, and he would have labs drawn around three in the morning, his bandages had been replaced and his surgery area looked good, other than the labs, and nurse rose checking on them throughout the night they should be good).

Misaki: You didn't have to make up the sofa, I could've done it by myself.

Nurse Rose: That's okay. It's my job.

Usagi: Misaki, relax let someone do something for you for once, plus don't you have an exam to study for? maybe do that for an hour huh?

Misaki: Fine. (Walks over to table near the window, grabs laptop, walks back over to Usagi and starts to work on study guide.

Usagi: Is this for German?

Misaki: Uh, Yeah.

Usagi: How do you feel about that?

Misaki: Good.

Usagi: Your grades are still passing?

Misaki: Ugh, yes Usagi, god you're in the hospital and you're still nagging me?

Usagi: (Reaches hand out) I just want you to graduate, you've worked so hard.

Misaki: (Smiles, takes his hand) I know, thank you.

Nurse rose: (Sits on the armchair of the sofa, she smiles at them). Do you Guys always banter like this?

Misaki: (Chuckles) Yeah kinda our thing.

Nurse Rose: So how long have you guys been together?

Usagi: (Moves bed up): Um, almost five years.

Nurse rose: How did you meet.

Misaki: He used to be my tutor, and was in love with my brother.

Nurse Rose: Really?

Usagi: Yeah, Kinda a long story.

Nurse Rose: And that doesn't make it weird.

Misaki: Um, there were times early in our relationship when I was worried he was still in love with him but-

Usagi: His brother means a lot to me, but Misaki's the love of my life, I love him so fucking much, I'll never love anyone as much as Misaki, he's my everything.

Nurse Rose: Wow, That's so sweet.

Misaki: (Sobbing) Usagi, stop saying stuff like that, I need to study.

Usagi: (Smirks) You already know that's how i feel about you, I say it to you all the time.

Misaki: Yeah, but i'm studyyinngggg.

Usagi: (Laughs). Get back to studying.

Misaki: You know i feel the same way about you right baby?

Usagi: Ahh, did you just call me baby? Do it again.

Misaki: Mmmhm, can't studying, watch tv or somthing.

Nurse Rose: Well (stands).If You need anything, you know how to get ahold of me.

Usagi: Yes, thank you.

Nurse Rose: (Exits).

(Misaki slams laptop and places it on the table in front of Usagi before pushing it out of the way, surprising him).

Usagi: Misaki, what are you doing? because we can't have sex if that's what you're trying to do. I mean I really want to, but we can't.

Misaki: No, I know that, but I have news.

Usagi: What news makes you act like THAT.

Misaki: Nurse Rose and Aikawa have a date tomorrow!

Usagi: Awe good for them.

Misaki: Why aren't you more Excited!

Usagi: I'll be more excited once you pass the test!

Misaki: (Grabs laptop) You're no fun.

Usagi: I-

Misaki: You just want me to graduate BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH!

Usagi: Misaki

Misaki: I'm studying, I'm studying.

Misaki: Done, are you happy? (he looked beside him, it was ten, Usagi was out cold, he placed his laptop on the table, turned the lights off, and changed the channel to some dumb sitcom that would give him a good laugh and walked back over to Usagi, he softly ran his fingers through his soft grey hair, and leaned down softy giving him a kiss on the lips). Goodnight my love (He walked over the the sofa and sighed as he crawled under the covers, it felt weird not cuddling next to Usagi, they've been doing it a lot more recently and he knew he would have a hard time sleeping not wrapped in Usagi's arms, he drifted off into an uneasy sleep.

#usagi #usagi x misaki #usami akihiko #misaki x usagi #akihiko usami #misaki #misaki takahashi #takahashi misaki #takahiro takahashi #isaka ryuichiro #isak #erin aikawa #aikawa #my OTP #otp feels #otp #gay otp #fanfiction #ship

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xxisxxisxxis · 4 years

Text

Gateway Drug | Part Forty-Nine

Table of Content or Part Forty-Eight

Wattpad

Word count: 3.9K

Warning(s): Explicit language, mentions of Drug abuse

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Vanity: something that is vain, empty, or valueless.

I watch with my water in hand as Vanity and Tansy dance like wasted strippers on the bar...granted they are wasted.

Sparkie and Nikki are in the bathroom, Vince is occupied with a bundle of groupies who waved him over, we're still waiting for Tommy to get here since it was date night with Heather but he still wanted to come out, so I'm sitting in silence with Mick and giving glances at anyone that looks like they may be interested in approaching me because I don't necessarily want to speak to anyone right now.

"So..." I start, finishing me water. "...How've you been?"

Mick takes a sip of his drink and nods a little bit.

"Not too bad." He tells me. "What about you? Did you and asshole work your shit out?" He asks and I scoff.

"Yeah." I tell him, smiling a little. "We're good."

I honestly believed we were at that moment. Stupid of me.

"Good." He replies.

Nikki, Tommy and Sparkie all show up simultaneously, Nikki and Sparkie heavily under the influence of more tha just alcohol.

"Hey, man." Nikki smiles to Tommy, patting him on the back. "Haven't seen you since the wedding...over two months ago." His dimpled smile is a nice cover up to to underlying anger and bitterness woven into his words.

Tommy has been nearly disconnected from everyone since Heather and he got married.

I'm glad they're getting along that well, but life doesn't revolve around one person.

Even my codependent ass can leave Nikki to spend time with my other friends, and vice versa.

"Oh, yeah, dude, we've been really busy." Tommy tells him as they sit by Mick and I. "We just bought a new house and she's had some time off so we've been just enjoying it before she starts on a new project and the album gets going for us." He explains.

"Nah, I get it." Nikki scoffs, glancing at me. "Being married changes shit around."

"That's why I'm not marrying Tansy." Sparkie says out of nowhere, looking at the blonde as she and Vanity are a compiled of booze and giggles, nearly tripping and falling off the bar in their heels.

"Just depends on the person, I guess. I like being married." Tommy shrugs. "I'm about to grab a drink. Mick, you want another?" He gets up from his seat, motioning to the empty glass of vodka Mick's finished.

"Sure." Mick tells him.

"Get Saint Vivian another water while you're at it." Sparkie tells him, his tone a degrading scrape at me for not drinking, and the look he gives me stamps the confirmation of his aggravating attempt to rile me up some.

Nikki shoots him an unamused glare and I can practically see him cowering back into his shell out of fear of pissing Nikki off.

My ego gets a pat on the head.

He might have worn more makeup than me at times, been spazzing on coke one minute and nodding off on smack the next, but he could still kick ass up one end and down the other over me.

Tommy comes back with drinks for him and Mick, bringing Vanity and Tansy back with him.

The two girls sit down, hand in hand, whispering and laughing among themselves as they try to catch their breath.

"Where'd Vince go?" Tansy asks us, running a hand through her platinum hair and Vanity looks around.

"Oh, he's socializing." Vanity lets out and Tansy glances over in her line of sight to see Vince making out with a tan blonde in a mini skirt.

Before Tansy can say anything else, Vanity's reaching across the little cocktail table with a beaming smile directed at Tommy.

"Hi, I'm Vanity." She pipes and Tommy looks as if he knows who she is, but is still confused as to why she's hanging out with us.

"Tommy." He replies, shaking her hand.

"I'm Tansalyn's and Nikki's friend." She adds for explanation and he raises his brows a little, quickly shifting his eyes to Nikki, whose expression I can't quiet read...he looks kind of nervous.

"Yeah, I've seen you on T.V. some." Tommy strikes up conversation with her and she just glows at the fact she's well-known. "And a few magazines." He adds.

"I've done several differing magazine issues." She informs in, nodding.

"Everything from fashion to Playboy." Tansy cuts in, grinning a little.

"So, that's how you two met?" I ask.

"Well, not exactly." Vanity explains. "We knew some people, who knew some people, who knew some people, who thought we'd be great friends and got us together and..." Her beautiful brown eyes catch on Nikki, who's nervousness seems more apparent, despite his neutral expression as he watches her. "...we just clicked from the beginning." She says softly, blinking at him before she quickly averts her attention back at Tansy, her hand squeezing at her's affectionately. "And have been great ever since." She adds.

"Agreed." Tansy nods, smiling at her.

"I need another drink." Nikki mumbles standing up.

"Can you get me some more water, please?" I ask him and he nods, stepping to the bar.

"Why's he so tense?" Tommy asks once he's out of earshot.

"Must be the blow." Sparkie suggests with a shrug. "He spent good money on it and it wasn't worth a damn."

I take it without question.

Vince is stepping to us before long, lip stick smudged on his lips as he tries to wipe it off before going home to his wife and child.

I just give him a ball busting look and he raises his brows.

"Go ahead and say it, Viv." He tells me, sighing.

"Swine." He and I say at the same time, except he's being a smart ass and I'm being serious.

"So, how did you and Nikki meet, exactly?" Vanity asks me out of nowhere and my water glass is merely slammed down in front of me, causing the liquid to slosh out a little, and causing me to jump out of my skin, as Nikki sits back down beside me with an entire bottle of Jack.

He's giving Vanity a surly look and she doesn't even flinch, her curious expression focused on me.

"Tommy introduced us." Nikki shortly states before I can explain it myself.

"Well, that's not just what happened, Nikki, I mean, you two are married aren't you?" She argues politely to him. "I want the whole story."

"Tommy introduced us, dated a couple years, engaged, married, here we are." Nikki, again, interrupts me.

"Baby, it's not that big of a deal." I mumble to him, wondering why he's being rude to her.

"Yeah, baby, it's not that big of a deal." She repeats me, and I can't tell if she's mocking me or just being flirtatious with the way she says "baby."

He rolls his eyes, irritated.

Vince seems to be studying Nikki as Vanity and Tansy change the subject to the album.

I don't listen very much, neither does Nikki, apparently, because it takes Tommy repeating his name three times, and me nudging his leg with mine to get his attention.

"Yeah?" He asks Tommy and Tansy and Vanity let out some more cocktail induced laughter as his lack of enthusiasm.

"Tansy was just talkin' to you." He tells him.

"Oh, what Tans?" Nikki asks, sighing out a little.

"I was just wondering if you've gotten any songs up yet for the album?"

"No? Why would I? There's not even a concept." He states, borderline abrasive.

"You had some songs for 'Theater of Pain' written before the concept was decided on." I remind him and he just let's out a breath.

"Well, there goes that conversation." Tansy exhales, playing it off like Nikki didn't hurt her feelings.

Vince is now giving the slightest hint of a smirk to Nikki before it suddenly disappears from his lips and he's excusing himself to go get a beer.

Game recognizes game. And Vince--being the cheating bastard he was--had sat there and put together what he needed to in order to figure out Nikki either fucked Vanity, was fucking her, or planned on fucking her until further notice. The answer was all three. And he made no attempt to tell me...not even when Nikki later told him and confirmed it.

"We're still working on figuring everything out, Tans." Tommy tells her in a more polite way than Nikki.

"Like you would know what's going on since you've been up Heather's ass all this time. Literally." Nikki stifles out and I look at him.

"What is wrong, Nikki?" I snap.

He just lets out an exaggerated breath before getting up and heading outside.

"He's always moody." Vanity cuts in, rolling her eyes, lighting a cigarette.

I ignore her and follow after him.

"Nikki." I say, my heels clicking against the wet pavement as fine rain sprinkles down on us.

"What?" He asks, going to where we parked.

"What's wrong with you?" I gently pull at his hand, stopping him.

"Nothing."

"Nikki, c'mon, now, I'm not stupid." I argue, crossing my arms. "You're an asshole but I know when you're an out of character asshole."

He just unlocks his Corvette and slides into the driver seat, shutting the door.

Before he can crank it and get his window rolled up, I'm 'Dukes of Hazzard'-ing his shit and putting my legs through the window, scooting into his lap, my feet in the passenger seat, and he leans his head back and let's out a loud groan of irritation.

I just crank the car for him and roll the window up to avoid getting rained on, before turning the car off and waiting patiently for him to start talking, blinking up at him.

"Alright..." he gives up, rubbing his face before resting his arm behind me on the sill of the window. "...fine." he sighs. "I shoulda gone to the funeral, I guess. And I thought I was ready to go out and see everybody but it just--Vince is being Vince. And Tommy hasn't even acknowledged anybody since he got married. Good for him he's so fucking happy in his relationship he can't even call his best friend every once in a while but whatever. And Vanity--Jesus Christ--Vanity." He grumbles. "Like dragging my balls against shards of fucking glass anytime she opens her mouth."

"Then why're you friends with her?" I ask him, chuckling, and he rubs his lips together, looking at me.

"We're into the same thing." He tells me and I don't have to ask what he means.

"So, she's a drug buddy." I say as his fingers trace along my kneecap.

"Yeah." He replies quietly.

"Well, I think she's nice." I admit and he looks at me crookedly.

"No. You can't be friends with her, Viv." He chuckles with obvious distaste of the idea, and I raise a brow.

"Why not? She seems like a sweet girl."

"As much as I'm a sweet guy." He scoffs out. "People like her aren't good friends to keep."

"Tansy's like her." I argue. "You're like her and we're married."

"I never claimed that Tansy's a good friend or that I'm a good husband, did I?" He asks me in a stern tone, avoiding my gaze.

"Why do you think you're such a bad husband, Nikki?" I furrow my brows.

"I'm not getting in to--"

"'--No, baby, I'm serious. It's like your default when you're high is apologizing to me for being a shitty husband." I point out and he shakes his head a little.

"I just feel like I let you down a lot." He shrugs.

"I'm not perfect, Nikki, I let you down more than you do me." I assure him.

"No..." he looks as if he's thinking about something for a moment. "...you don't. I promise."

I was too caught up in Nikki's mood to notice the hole in the story Tansy had told me of Tommy taking Nikki out for our anniversary. But it was the first red flag that popped up in hindsight while assessing the situation after I found out he was having an affair.

Tansy had told me Tommy was taking Nikki out for our anniversary that year, that was the night me and the guys got locked up for a little bit.

That first night back out with Mötley and Vanity Nikki mentioned not seeing or talking to Tommy since his wedding...over two months prior.

What really happened on our anniversary: Vanity came to our house and was still there when Nikki came to pick me up from jail. Which is why he wasn't too eager for me to go back home with him.

My finger tips lightly brush over the scratch of his unshaven cheek and I give him my best smile, hoping it will cheer him up.

He just keeps his near frown and I decide to do to him what he does to me when he's trying to cheer me up.

My lips press to his cheek softly, then pepper random kisses all over his face until he's smiling, finishing off with one, long, passionate kiss to his lips.

"Okay." I breathe out, about to find a way to get out of his lap so we can go back inside.

He puts his arm across my legs, though and stops me, giving me a devious grin.

"We don't have time." I giggle, squealing a little as his fingers trail up the inside of my leg, going up my skirt as he says:

"There's always time."

Just before he can breach the fabric of my panties, a loud knock on our window has us both jolting.

It's Tommy.

Nikki sighs out cranking the car and rolling the window down.

"The girls are hungry." He explains to us.

"And?" Nikki asks.

"They want food, dude, c'mon." Tommy chuckles, nudging his arm.

"What're you kids up to?" I hear Vince next, and I lean my head back to lay on the open window frame so I can look up to see him and Tommy.

"Guys, let's go!" I hear Sparkie shout from the entrance of the club we were in and me, Vince, Nikki, and even Tommy, all share a collective eyeroll.

I think it's safe to say we simply tolerate the greasy bastard at this point.

"Ignore it, it'll go away." Nikki says, rubbing his eye.

"Guys!" Vanity calls next, the bubbliness of her personality in her tone.

"Why the hell is she so perky?" Vince asks next.

"She's been on a three day bender of base. That's why." Nikki replies flatly, rolling his eyes at the sound of heels coming towards us and my ears perk up, deciding to put the question on the tip of my tongue away for now.

He opens his door and Tommy helps me out of the car, Tansy and Vanity hand in hand.

"We're starving." Tansy tells us.

"The Rainbows's our best bet." Tommy suggests.

"Okay, let's go." Tansy shrugs, pulling gently at Vanity's hand, and Vanity's hand grasps at mine and pulls me along with them as we head to the Rainbow.

I wasn't good at making girl friends. Tansy came into my life before I adapted to mainly being around guys, so it was never hard to form a close friendship with her, but I got along better with men because Tansy, Tommy and Vince were the only people I really ever had relationship with before meeting Nikki, and Mick and my other friends I gained through them.

To this day, my list of close girl friends consists of Tansy, Susan--who I was motivated to get to be friends with because she's the step mother of Monroe, Brittany--who's married to Tommy...and is young enough to be one of mine and Nikki's miscarried children so I view her more like a daughter than a friend--and Sharise and I are still very close, despite her being divorced from Vince for 27 years.

Of course, over the years, I've had to adapt at being friends with everyone's girlfriends and wives until they split.

And most of them were sweet girls, so after a while it got annoying because I'd get attached to them and really like them, and then BAM! Divorce or sudden break up.

I learned not to get too attached to new lovers of any of my male friends. They wouldn't be around for long.

That being said, one of my girl friends, believe it or not, was actually my husband's mistress, for an entire year.

She just had a...er...learning curve, if you will.

I watch as Nikki goes back and forth from our bedroom, to the front door, going outside, coming back inside, and repeating.

"Uh...babe?" I call, raising a brow and he stops by the living room where I'm sitting on the couch in my pajamas, reading "The Art of War" and eating a granola bar.

"Yeah?" He raises his brows.

"Whatcha doin'?" I ask curiously.

"It's been over a month since Tansy was asking about the album concept and I realized I needed to start writing for the album, like, a month ago, so I'm cleaning up my shit in our closet and bedroom and kicking drugs so I can focus." He explains, walking back to our bedroom and I raise my brows, a little surprised.

"Do you wanna read my book?!" I offer.

"Nope, got my own strategy!" He replies.

"But is it on Sun Tsu's level?!"

"I'm getting a dog!" He explains and I furrow my brows, putting my book down and walking to meet him in the bedroom.

"A what?" I cross my arms as he's putting needles and trash into a garbage bag.

"It'll be like having a kid around, so I'll have more incentive--aside from you, and working on the album--not to shoot smack and keep away from blow." He goes on.

"A dog?" I repeat.

"Yep."

"You know if you're serious about kicking it this time, you're gonna have to distance yourself from some of your friends." I remind him. "No more Jason or any other dealers, no more Izzy--"

"--You're friends with Izzy, too." He argues.

"I'm not trying to get off drugs." I tell him. "And Tansy and Vanity."

"Okay, you three have sleepovers like fucking high school girls. How the hell am I suppose to avoid them when they're at my house all the time?"

"Well...Tansy doesn't have a house here in L.A. and Vanity's apartment gives me a God-awful feeling everytime I step foot in there." I inform him.

"Right, and I'm the paranoid one." He mumbles.

"Babe. When you're lying in bed and feel someone get into bed with you and start breathing down your neck, and nobody's freaking in bed with you when you turn to see who it is, you kinda never want to even think about going into the apartment it took place in ever again." I state and he chuckles.

"I would've asked it for a blow job." He comments.

"Nikki, I'm serious."

"I am, too." He defends himself and I give him an unamused look. "Alright, fine, for entertainment sake, let's say she has monsters under her bed. What sense would that make? She's up Jesus' ass as far as you are and I highly doubt dark shit stays around God fanatics." He brushes me off.

"Um, hard, mind altering drugs are a pretty good invitation for quote unquote 'dark shit' to hang around people. It makes it easier to get in their heads, break them down, and try to kill them."

"Kill them?" He tries not to laugh. "Are you on drugs?"

"Nikki, I'm being serious. I'm worried about our friend."

"Which friend? We've got, like, all of them on the highway to hell right now." He scoffs, tying off the full garbage bag.

"She's got a lot of shit she's carrying on her, Nikki, and I'm scared for her. And Tansy can say 'everything's fine' but I know she's got a lot of shit happening behind closed doors that she won't open up about, too."

"Everyone has shit going on behind closed doors, babe. That's life in this business. Smiles and good times out on the town, and demon filled bedrooms when we get back home." He shrugs.

"Is that not sad to you?" I ask and he sighs, stepping to me.

"Just pray about it. Like everything else you worry with." He wraps his arms around me and I roll my eyes, taking it as sarcasm. "Get all quiet and soft sounding so you don't wake me up, and start talking to the ceiling about bullshit that won't matter a month from now..." He grins, pressing a kiss to my neck and I refuse the urge to push him away from me because he's making fun of me. "...and after an hour of wasting your breath, you end it in 'in Jesus' name I pray, amen'. And then I think, 'wow, she's really has me fooled to believe she isn't on something, too'." He laughs out.

"Find it funny all you want. My prayers for your's and everyone else's bullshit doesn't fall on deaf ears or one of you would be dead by now." I state.

He smirks, before a lightbulb goes off in his eyes before walking to the closet.

"I'm glad we're on this topic of conversation because it's great foreplay for this." He pulls out a raunchy mockery of a catholic school girl uniform I completely forgot we had and I cross my arms.

"You don't get to insult my religious beliefs and then turn around and fantasize about a concept attached to a denomination of said religion."

"You can put it on and talk to me about getting on your knees all you want." He keeps his smirk and I grab the uniform off the bed, about to go hide it somewhere else in the house.

"We have plenty of film of me with this on to choose from. There's no need for a live show." I peck him on the lips and walk out of our bedroom with the skimpy clothing.

"I meant getting on your knees to pray!" He tries to tell me to get me to bring the outfit back and I laugh.

He was serious about quitting...but once he started getting dope sick, he got desperate enough to go out in the middle of the night, get the garbage bags full of used cottons and needles, and use the rinses of cotton to ring the smallest fix out of them before getting Jason back over as soon as possible.

And I knew he got back on crack when I came home from seeing Sharise and Skylar, to him and Vanity locked in our bedroom.

When I finally picked the lock, Vanity was having a base fueled arts and crafts session on the bed--wearing my clothes that I'd left in the floor--trying to explain the inspiration of her art was Jesus coming back for the rapture, while Nikki was screaming about his late grandmother, in the closet.

And that's typically what I would walk in on if they were at our house. It always appeared like they were way too far gone in their minds to even think about sex. So I honestly never thought anything about it.

But if there's a will, there's a way, and in the midst of Nikki waving a gun around, screaming, and Vanity laughing like a maniac while plastering glitter, styrofoam peanuts and Nikki's used cottons on a piece of construction paper, the two of them had the will and found a way to kickstart the demise of my already fragile marriage.

They truly were functioning addicts.

#nikki sixx #mötley crüe #nikki sixx x oc #nikki sixx fanfiction #gateway drug

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