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#save bean party
hauntingblue · 1 month
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Zoro was about to tell luffy off for making a scene but luffy just says some guys spilled red bean soup and he starts to make a worse one. Amazing
#broon took robins place.... so is she just gonna walk????? damn....#zoro fucking people up for making fun of hungry people..... yeah yeah yeah#now it's luffy's turn.... THEY SPILLED THE RED BEAN SOUP ON LUFFY IT'S GOING DOWN#everyone looks so good with these outfits.... horns really do compliment anyone....#episode 984#kaido wants to marry yamato to one of big mom's sons.... or she wont consider them allies i know it....#kid has kimg's haki too??? and zoro... they do really give that to anyone....#drops of red bean soup on luffy's face to look like tears... (to me)#luffy eating all the soup..... he should take it outside back to the boat akdhsksjk OKUBORE PEOPLE WE ARE EATING TONIGHT!!!#oh jesus.... elephant gun in the middle of the party.... zoro going to the conflict ahdkajs of course#they turned on the lights and everything... WHY did zoro slice the building??? 😭😭#episode 985#talking tag#watching one piece#they are gonna show that scene of tama eating soup 84 more fucking times#'are you happy now?' 'yeah' 'let's run then' INCREDIBLE#APOO TURN THAT SHIT DOWN!!! WHAT IS THAT!!! BOOOOO!!!#THAT DOESN'T EVEN RHYME!!! GET DOWN OF THAT STAGE!!#luffy biting that dog akshakskq#zoro fucking!!! slash him!! do a projectile slash or whatever!! you know how!!#FUCK HIM UP KID YEAAAH!!!!!! NO ANOTHER ONE FOR GOOD MEASURE!!! JUST IN CASE!!#episode 986#do kaido and the others not hear all this???? its right on their castle door akdhsksj#his ass is not uncoscious yet!!! quit the yapping and hit him again kid!!! SEE WHAT HAPPENS!!! SUCK THE BLOOD OUT OF HIS VEINS!! ENOUGH!!#he needs to pull some magneto shit right now!!!#sanji seeing shinobu ball crush some guys and sanji wondering if he would want to try it too!!! I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE SANJI!! 🫵🏻🤨#a tobi roopo has a burdel..... sanji is dying this fight.... this is his final arc.... goodbye sanji... what a shame...#nvm the brothel is empty... sanji gets to live another day#killer ate the fruit to save his captain!!! omg!!! ORICHI WHEN I GET YOU!! Exactly kid kill them all.... fuck em and apoo too.#episode 987
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beananium · 10 months
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I THOUGHT OF A NEW KAIMEI AU I NEED TO DRAW RIGHT FUNKING NOW
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ohwyrm · 1 year
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:)
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Thinking about baby daddy!Miguel O’Hara who you aren’t dating anymore despite being college sweethearts but is still around for the baby, since he’s little Gabriella is his whole world and deserves having both you and him as parents despite your relationship as boyfriend and girlfriend no longer existing.
Baby daddy!Miguel who you do custody swaps with every week so you both get time with your daughter, giving each other updates on what the other missed, her next soccer game, which homework assignments she needs help with, her next doctors appointments, which friends birthday party is coming up and how Gabri still need to go pick up a gift for them.
Baby daddy!Miguel who always gets overly excited during one of Gabriella’s soccer games, always cursing the ref in Spanish when he red cards your daughter, and you’ve noticed that she makes the same faces as her father when she’s frustrated by the other team. You both always save each other's seats depending on who gets there first, and who has Gabriella that week. Gabriella always begs for you three to go out “just for pizza” after the game to celebrate, that ends up just turning into a whole family outing day, where you end up going to the mall or la pulga (flea market) afterwards.
Baby daddy!Miguel who says he doesn’t care if you start seeing anyone else as long as you make sure that Gabri is your number one priority.
Baby Daddy!Miguel who has Gabriella this week, making a comment about how you seemed to oddly be rushing custody swap this week to Gabriella while she colors in the kitchen, a random episode El chavo playing in the background that she was watching beforehand when she casually drops the bomb that you had a date that night.
“What was up with your mom today? Was she running late to watch the new episode of a show or something.” Miguel joked as he checked on the black beans he was making, glancing over to his 10 year old.
“She said she was gonna go hang out with someone.” She answered, going to switch from purple to blue as she looked at her half finished unicorn.
“Oh yeah? Who? That one friend from her work, what’s her name? Jamie?”
“Her name is Jenny.” His daughter deadpan, she got the sass from you. “And no, she said some… guy that she met from work.” She added nonchalantly, almost causing Miguel to drop the ladle he was holding onto the tile floor of his kitchen.
“A guy!”
Part 2
Not proofread.
Work count: 400
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in-som-niyah · 1 month
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GirlDad!Jason who supports you all throughout your pregnancy; holding your hair when you get sick, rubbing your sore feet and ankles, holding you through cramps/braxton hicks, buying you everything you craved etc.
GirlDad!Jason who cried for hours after she was born. His little girl, just as beautiful as you, all bundled up in soft blankets. He never believed he could love someone so much, it was like his entire body was burning with love and compassion for this little bean in his arms. For once, the world stopped, just for him.
GirlDad!Jason drives the most carefully he ever has in his life when coming back from the hospital. Despite your incessant giggling about how you've never seen him so scared, he drove like a damn senior citizen. He was carrying the most precious cargo, could you blame him?
GirlDad!Jason who changes diapers, feeds, bathes and plays with your daughter. He never leaves her for more than 5 minutes, and is involved to the point of mild annoyance. You would put your daughter down for 5 seconds and return to her gone, and in his arms. It's the most adorable thing though, you wouldn't trade it for the world.
GirlDad!Jason who can't stand to see your daughter upset. It's a trait he developed when she got to the toddler age, always fussing about everything she can't have and Jason giving in. Every time.
GirlDad!Jason who cries on her first day of kindergarten. Would never admit it though, but he hates seeing her grow up. He dreaded the day she learned how to tie her shoes and zip up her coat independently. It makes him feel like she doesn't need him anymore :(
GirlDad!Jason who will, without fail, play princesses, hair salon, tea party and barbies with his daughter. It doesn't matter if the world needs saving or if Bruce is up his ass, his daughter comes second to nothing. Even if it's to kiss a minor booboo she got while running around the house.
GirlDad!Jason who always brings back little trinkets and toys for his daughter. Her bedroom will be cluttered with stuffed animals and shiny things that caught his eye or reminded him of her. She would anticipate his key in the door which meant daddy brought home something for her. No matter how old she gets, he won't stop.
GirlDad!Jason who absolutely fucks up bullies. Be it in kindergarten or in college, Jason will make sure she and her friends are never bothered again. I cannot disclose his methods for legal reasons.
GirlDad!Jason who doesn't freak out about periods. He's so loving and supportive and doesn't ever make her feel ashamed about it. He'll bring her tea, hot chocolate, hot water bottles, painkillers, heating pads and rub her back if she's in a lot of pain. He'll take the day off to stay with her, and never force her to go to school on those days.
GirlDad!Jason who absolutely spoils his daughter shamelessly. Mom said no more sweets? Well dad sure isn't going to place a bag of candy under her pillow the next day. She wants a car for her 16th birthday? His baby gets a pink Porsche with a bow on top. She's obsessed with X artist? All the merch in the world miraculously ends up in her room.
GirlDad!Jason who will tower menacingly over her first partner. It doesn't matter how much you or your daughter like them, Jason's imagining a thousand ways to hide their dismembered body.
GirlDad!Jason who needs to be talked down from killing said partner when he finds his daughter balled up in a crying mess on her bed when they break up. Nobody makes his precious girl sad. He'll definitely egg their house without your knowledge. He buys her everything she could ever ask for to make her feel better, no matter how stupidly expensive.
GirlDad!Jason who's always up to a conversation. No matter how embarrassing or personal, he'll listen and give honest advice. Because he's so open, your daughter almost never hides anything from him.
GirlDad!Jason who bawls after dropping her off at university. Again, would never admit it, but sleeps on the floor of her bedroom for the first month she's away. He can't help but miss his little (adult) girl. He also flips through pictures and videos on his phone of when your daughter was little and sheds a few tears. Honestly it only makes you love him more.
GirlDad!Jason who still doesn't like your daughter's college partner. He's better this time around, but still. Don't put murder past him. Yet.
GirlDad!Jason who cries when your daughter shows him her shiny new engagement ring. He's so excited yet terrified. His baby girl is all grown up now.
GirlDad!Jason who walks your daughter down the isle with the brightest smile on his face. He slowly comes around to liking her fiancé(é) and honestly wishes them well.
GirlDad!Jason who meets your daughter at the hospital, ready to meet his new granddaughter for the first time. He holds her in his arms, just like he did his daughter, and gleams knowing the cycle is repeating itself. He couldn't be more excited.
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a/n: sequel to this post i guess??? i needed something cute with jason and his daughter bc..... well..... we don't talk about my own father :D
night night guys
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starsexplodeatnight · 3 months
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Tf141 guys x Reader
Okay, Sooooo
I don’t know what this is per say, just
John Price x Florist!reader
Kyle Garrick x Dog-walker!reader
John Mactavish x Nurse!reader
Simon Riley x Preschool-teacher!reader
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Price first!!!
This old dog is not having a good day. The first time you two meet? He’s looking to order a sympathy piece… a fallen solider. So, he’s not in the best mood when he enters your shop.
Then, you come out the back with your sweet smile. It feels like lip balm on chapped lips, soothing the cracks splintering his heart in this moment.
“Hi, I’m *Name*. Welcome, how can I help you?” With a soft look on your face.
Fuck him, he needs the kindness. You’re so understanding when he tells you, not overly patronizing just… kind. Understanding. You’d have to be, having to make arrangements and funeral pieces as much as you do.
While you’re quickly piecing the arrangement together you talk to him, just a natural flow of conversation. He does pause when you ask. “What do you want in the arrangement? What would you like it to look like?” “Sympathetic?” And you laugh. “Fair enough.”
He likes that laugh.
You hand him the arrangement and tell him how to take care of the flowers to make them last longer. Then give him this sweet, sweet encouraging smile…
Yeah, he comes back a week later. Up front asks: “You want to get dinner Love?” Makes you flush, your co-workers in the back giggling until you shoo them away. “That sounds lovely.”
‘Love really does bloom, doesn’t it?’ He muses.
Generally? Your life together is sweet.
You’re together for about a year before he proposed. He’s a man, he’s old enough to know what he wants. He wants to wake up with you ever morning with the safety of that ring around your finger. That, if anything ever happens to him? He could still provide even in his absence…
You hate it when he talks like that but, accept that you need to be realistic… deep down? It makes you feel loved. A painful, sorrowful, love.
He helps you when he can. Whenever he’s home? He’s at your shop helping you get any extra work done so you can spend as much time together as you can while he’s not deployed.
You need help assembling an arbor for a wedding? He uh- he has carpentry skills… let him help, love. He builds you the sturdiest arbor in the industry!
Deliveries? He’ll run those, he’s got time. He doesn’t mind. Warms his heart a bit to do some good delivering flowers to people… they get so happy when he shows up with flowers.
He helps you set up the flowers at weddings! He also refuses to do anything that puts him within the vicinity of the bride and her party! They mistook him as a stripper once, never again. Never again. He’s a happily married man, thank you very much!
What kind of male stripper wears a hat like his any way? Wrangler jeans and a L.L Bean shirt that’s probably older than the bride!!! It was actually very cute to see how steamed he was after that…
You make sure to give HIM flowers. Most men don’t get flowers until their funeral … You don’t want that to be John. He melts a little when you bring himself home flowers you arranged yourself just for him.
You’ve looked up and seen him leaning on the table with a rose between his teeth. As soon as you made eye contact, he wiggles his brows. It made you crack up, he did it just for that reason. A rare moment of silliness from your John.
Will judge other brides choices when you bring home the files for the weddings you’re hired for. But, nothing will ever compare to your wedding to him in his eyes because your wedding was the best. Ever.
He saved your bouquet, dried it and framed it. Gave it to you as an anniversary present.
He then played your wedding song and you two slow danced in a circle together…. Sigh…
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Gaz!:
Kyle was on his morning run when he saw you. Across the street with a few dogs, you looked so fucking happy, that made you look so fucking pretty.
You’re wearing an over sized t-shirt, sweatpants and look frazzled as you wrangle 4 dogs at once. You don’t even notice the Adonis across the street as you try and regain steady footing as the dogs all do their best to keep you on your toes.
Brock the 3 year old yellow lab was a puller… and he is CHONKY so you didn’t have much time to pay attention to anything else.
Kyle now tries to ‘bump’ into you. Timing his run to make a meet cute happen. Fuck him if he’s already done his run and doesn’t see you only to spot you once he’s on his door step sweaty and gross! EVERY TIME!
He’ll try and go again even though his legs are burning. This? This stunt catches the dogs attention, not yours. You’ve got 5 today and they HAUL ASS to go see Kyle. And you’re just dragged to his feet.
“Oh my god! I’m so sorry! They’re all friendly, I swear!” You wheeze, Kyle laughs. “Don’t worry Luv! S’fine. It’s cute,” He’s not looking at the dogs, despite the Jack Russell ‘Shermie’ making eyes at him.
Ah ha! Kyle has ingratiated himself! He get’s so pumped as soon as he gets home! You invited him to walk with you! ‘Anytime!’ Fuck yeah! He does a fist pump and dances foot to foot.
He finds dogs are a good judge of character and, these dogs? They love you. And you are devoted to them despite them not being yours. He finds those qualities incredibly attractive.
Generally? You two are cute.
He’ll take the high energy dogs on jogs for you when you meet up. He can keep up with them! *subtle flex*
He despite his athleticism? He likes the small, slow dogs. Like the blind, cross eyed Shi tzu ’Louie’ and the grumpy old Bassett ‘Geraldine’
It gave him ample time to walk leisurely and talk to you… You, Gaz and Geraldine went on many walks together.
He love, love, loves whenever you send him a selfie of you and one of the dogs! He’s got a whole folder of them and the newest picture you send? That one is always his newest Lock Screen.
Has worn a dog papoose and, has carried a dog while wearing a dog papoose. He is not ashamed, you thought he looked cute. And he takes all compliments of any kind. Hell yeah he looks cute, thanks baby!
He loves those prissy little toys. ‘Teddy’ the Pomeranian is one of his favorites, Teddy just loves being held. Oh, Kyle looks so attractive holding that spoiled little poof… he’s so sweet and caring with it too. Fuck!
He holds you if one of your regulars dies. Losing an animal is hard, especially when you’d been walking that dog since it was a puppy… he’s here luv, it’s okay. His eyes are misty too because, he cared for that dog too.
He get’s a Bassett stuffed animal, ‘R.I.P Geraldine, you helped me find something worthwhile.’
He proposes to you that night.
You have a little Bassett hound topper on your cake as a small tribute to the dog that helped you get closer…
He will and HAS gotten between you and an aggressive dog. He doesn’t like hurting animals but, fuck if he was going to left anyone hurt his baby and her charges! Tries to beat the piss out of the owner.
His wedding gift to you? A dog. Not just any dog! He wanted to get you one that will keep you safe while he’s deployed and one that will help you handle your charges. So he get’s you a very highly trained Belgian malinois.
Her name is Gracie and she helps you both sleep better at night…
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Soap!:
Oh, oh Soap. He get’s lambasted during a mission and gets put into hospital. His nurse? An over tired, over worked, grumpy woman who will not put up with Tom-fuckery during her shift.
In rolls in Soap: a battered pile of tenderized meat who immediately attempts a pick up line while she’s trying to make him comfortable. Oh, it’s going to be a long recovery.
Every goddamn shift! He’d light up every single fucking time you walk into the room! Oh, it makes you want to smother him with a pillow -cute aggression-
It’s not fair! You wanted to hate him! Be the grumpy bitch nurse and go on with your day! But, he makes it hard!!!
He seems so genuinely interested and not some creepy perv hitting on a nurse! He asks you how you are in such a genuine way, he leans in to listen, retains information! He does try and rile you up but, only because he thinks your ‘angry face’ is ‘cute’ the bastard! Who gave him the right to call you cute!?
And he loves, despite how angry you present yourself. You are the gentlest nurse, you care, you’re still a good nurse despite trying to act as jaded as the older nurses. You remember he does like certain foods, you get blood on the first draw and you always know what he needs…
God, it’s tumbling down the slippery slope faster than you ever imagined. You weren’t supposed to catch feelings! That’s not allowed!!! But when he’s finally discharged? He finds you, and offers to walk you home instead of going with his friends to celebrate his discharge.
He knew how much it meant to you for him to acknowledge what you’ve done for him… even behind the tough wall you put up.
He’ll always remember you stayed far past your shift to watch him when he spiked a fever and was critical…
You two are sour and sweet.
He rips those jaded glasses off your face and gives you a big kiss.
You’re kinda just- not codependent! but, something on the healthier side of that. You have a comfortable rhythm. He’ll go out with friends at night, stalling until you come off your shift and he can pick you up.
He gets to spend time with friends, you get to walk home knowing you’re safe at 2 in the morning… even if you have to steady him on the way home after one too many pints.
He has bought a sexy nurse costume for you. He mainly wants you to wear it, he has worn it as well…
He loves your stories! You have the best stories! He’ll sit you on the bar so you can regale his mates that story of that guy! “You know- that guy! The one that got that thing stuck up his ass!” “Which one?”
Sometimes you just, put your hand over his eyes. He looks at you with such fucking love it’s ridiculous. He just pushes further into your hand when you do this.
He will lie down and offer to be your dummy if you need a refresher on anatomy. Wiggles his eyebrows for emphasis.
It’s a personal victory whenever he makes you laugh.
He is lord and savior to the children in the hospital. He will come to visit the children’s care unit, full gear. You find him, and he is their god. They cling to his arms and legs, he’s still moving around, strong enough to keep on going even with 7 kids clinging to him.
He will use his little minions to his own personal advantage. Make them give you, like drawings and paper flowers just to see you smile. And for his own amusement.
It’s like Syd the Sloth and the tiny sloths.
He tells you he can’t wait until you have your own… you never imagined you’d actually ever get baby fever after working as a nurse again… Johnny makes that happen.
He makes you cry when he’s deployed. Wipes your tears away with his thumbs. “Oh, lass. Don’t cry! I ‘Ken you can put me back together if I come back in pieces.” He tries to joke, only makes you cry harder…
He holds you a little tighter after that one.
He never wants you to have to put you through that, ever. He cringes every time he remembers he said that… that he thought it was okay to joke about putting you through that.
Marries you after he comes home from deployment. He comes back in better shape this time too. He’s got to be careful now, doesn’t he?
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Ghost:
This man? This man falls for a preschool teacher.
He’s just sitting in the park, minding his own business when he see’s you pass with your little class walking behind you like ducklings. Fuck, when was the last time he’d seen someone so pure?
Your preschool was just on the edge of the park and you, with a few other handlers, were letting the kids explore the park under supervision. Their ‘task’ is to find the ‘fauna’ of the park!
Imagine his surprise when more than 4 of the little crotch goblins run up to him specifically. He thought he was scary to the little kids, well apparently not! You rush over to his rescue when you see them using him as a piece of playground equipment.
Oh, he looked so confused. Frozen like a deer in headlights as you stifle your giggle, peeling the 4 year old girl off his lap. “I’m so sorry!” “No, s’fine… cheeky buggers.” The kids all giggle, eager to play with him again.
Ghost then adds it into his schedule to mosey past your school every afternoon. You always know when he does because it’s always at recess and all the kids (except a few) flock to the fence to say hello to ‘Mr Ghost.’
He feels like a celebrity… softens his prickly heart to see all these sweet kids admire him… he thinks so poorly of himself, then he looks at these kids and you? You all look at him with such adoration…. Makes him feel like a human being again instead of a war machine.
And you look at him with such love. You find it sweet he takes his time to come see the kids, graciously accepting their pictures they drew of him.
He was kind of awkward at first, he’d stood ramrod straight like he would with his old drill sergeant and informed you of his record. He wasn’t a creep, he was in the military, and this was his little… respite from all the bile he had to face.
You couldn’t turn him away. You welcomed him every time you saw him over the fence. He remained behind the boundary of the fence and was . He was very grateful you didn’t think he was a creep and trespassed him from walking by.
You two were blissful.
You asked him out on a date. He asked you how many children you wanted… so sweet. lol
He finds you absolutely beautiful, bouncing one of your students on your hip whenever he stops by. He can’t help it. He can’t wait until you have kids of your own, you’ll teach them to be such wonderful human beings. He’ll teach them how to defend themselves and he’ll keep you all safe.
He becomes a bit of a helper around the preschool whenever he’s not deployed. He’s certified in cpr- why not? He mostly just watches the class room to see if any kid is doing anything wrong and preventing anyone from choking.
Kids take turns sitting in his lap whenever he’s sitting. He acts like he doesn’t care but you know he adores it.
Little girls will bring him stuffed animals and by the time class ends he’s surrounded by every stuffed animal in class. He remembers all of their names too. Oh, you can’t help it you get cute aggression with him!
Will walk around with your lipstick prints all over his balaclava. He will dodge envy attempt to wipe them off. They’re his!
After a long day, he’ll help you clean up the class room. In his mind he’s playing this scenario out, like you two are cleaning up after your own kids.
Hates the moms. He hates every single one of of the moms. They’re annoying. They’re coming after his fine ass because they didn’t find a man that treat them right, like he does you and he’s not putting up with it!
Asks you to give him hickeys once. ‘‘But love, yes.’’ After you tell him ‘‘no!’’ “We work in a preschool!” “And? They bite each otha’ all the time.” “Simon!”
He is their god, part 2.
They laugh at all of his stupid jokes, which in turn makes you laugh and now he’s a smug bastard.
Vibes with Bluey, you two watch it together. Aims to be like Bandit when he’s a dad. Takes it as a compliment when you tell him. “You’re pretty much a dead ringer for him already love.” Like, stunned for a second before he’s kissing your temple.
He hates deploying now.
All the kids cry when he does, it’s awful. Then, it makes you cry too. You were trying so hard to be strong and now you’re crying along with them.
Makes him feel like a worse monster than he thought he was.
Tada! Idk what this was! But there ya’ go! Enjoy!
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konigsblog · 30 days
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stepfather-könig, the priest of the church...⛪
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WARNINGS: STEPCEST, NON-CON/RAPE, sinning, manipulation, religious themes, age difference/age gap, old-fashioned views & misogyny.
synopsis: it's his duty to keep you free from sin and to punish you when you disobey by his rules, right, mäuschen?
DEAD DOVE: DO NOT EAT. THE MEDIA YOU CHOOSE TO CONSUME IS YOUR RESPONSIBILITY ALONE.
MDNI - 18+ ONLY.
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your stepfather had always told you to save yourself for marriage, that it was in your best interest to keep yourself pure for your husband, to obey his orders, and to keep yourself submissive and obedient. 
hearing that you wanted to go to college was already enough for könig, whose beliefs were old-fashioned. he believed you'd be better off in the kitchen, cooking and cleaning, like a woman should.
he didn't like the idea of you being independent and having a choice of your own. to könig, you need a man's guidance, and he knew you better than anyone better than yourself. he didn't like that you no longer had to depend on your stepfather for love and adoration. to make matters worse, you came home from college parties with the smell of booze, liquor, and marijuana obvious from your breath, as well as the new, fresh hickeys sucked into your bare neck.
your stepfather believed that this was enough for a brutal punishment. the sight was infuriating; it left könig feeling sick to his stomach, and könig couldn't help himself from dragging you to the ground by your hair and screaming at you for being sinful and ungodly. you had tears running down your burning cheeks, sobbing out pathetically on your knees as he shamed you for being a filthy whore and for not obeying his orders.
you felt his large and calloused hands grasp at the bible laying on the coffee table, the smell of bitter coffee beans from his breath as he growled at you to read, forced to mutter verses from the bible whilst he spread your soft thighs, tearing your panties off your figure while forcing you to pray for your forgiveness, to be spared, and for mercy. it was disgusting and humilating for the priest to see his stepdaughter commit lust and become so provocative. each thrust left your voice shaking, trembling from the ache between your thighs, his thick and girthy cock stretching your pretty cunt out.
you heaved and cried, too intoxicated to think straight or to mumble a coherent sentence. your glassy, teary eyes rolled back as you stuttered over your words, choking on your pitiful, pained cries while your stepfather degraded and shamed you, spitting cruel and horrible words at you as he raped your tight, raw cunt ‘til it was swollen and sore. the sight of your crimson blood running down your thighs was used as encouragement for könig, to continue with his violence until you promised to listen. he growled and huffed, rutting into you mercilessly and unforgivingly, admiring the state of your wet face before slapping you brutally, your eyes unfocused as you babbled out an apology.
it's his duty as a priest and your stepfather to make sure you're pure and obedient to your future husband. he can't allow you to commit sinful acts without consequence; it's for your own benefit, schatzchen... now, stop crying and let him rape your weak body into obedience.
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007reid · 8 months
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coffee caramels. spencer reid
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this is my submission for the cm meet cute (or not) challenge by @imagining-in-the-margins ! i did VERY loose research on the stuff spencer sprouts off on because i am not our boy genius so sorry if there are any inaccuracies ':( this is my first time writing for spencer but i literally love it so much and i'd love to write more so plz flood my inbox with requests for him plzzz 😭
pairing: fem!reader x spencer reid
prompt: character sits next to a stranger in the theater, but the two end up bonding when there's a technical glitch.
warnings: slightly grumpy!reader and sunshine!spencer my fav trope <333 confident reader, reader makes the first move, spencer being a bbg and blushing a lot ;)) all the good stuff
word count: 2.7k
you arrived at the theater ten minutes early, bee-lined to the popcorn section and asked for extra butter. you loaded your oily popcorn up with coffee caramels and chocolate-covered coffee beans and bought a large coke. you walked in the theater, confident and fully armed with enough caffeine to hopefully keep you awake during the entire thing. you have tape in your bag to peel your eyes open just in case things go south, but you're confident enough to believe that it won't.
because it can't.
"aelita," your professor had said on friday, "is a russian phenomenon, and it is one of my top favorite films. considering how you are all in a russian literature class, i can make the safe assumption that you are all interested in russian culture."
now, not only were you in a russian literature class as an elective like two-thirds of your class, you were also a russian literature and poetry major. how you ended with that major baffles you and there hasn't been a day where you wanted to choose another major, but there hasn't been a day where you weren't depressed about your poor decision-making either. it's a battle you fight every day.
"aelita was first screened in 1924, and this year, next week, there will be a worldwide re-screening of the film in its originality, no edits, completely authentic, except with added subtitles for those who need it, of course," this was when your professor got very stern. "i want all of you to go and watch it. if you don't want to, fine, but there will be an assessment grade on this movie. this is not optional. i believe that the content of this movie is very true to our..."
at that point you had stopped listening, because you knew what your professor wanted you to do, and you dreaded doing it.
two hours, silent, black and white, russian film with subtitles. and you have to hang onto the movie's every word.
not your ideal saturday night plans, but for your academic career, you were willing to take that leap; looking like a sore loser at the empty theater with black framed glasses on instead of getting fucked up in someone's bathtub. it's fine. the partying was all up to the business majors anyway.
when you walked into the theater, it was, understandably, vacant, save for a couple men and women with graying hair or bald scalps and bad backs. you were clearly not the target audience. none of them had snacks on them either, and you felt awkward being the one responsible for the strong aroma of butter and coffee that stuffed the place the moment you walked in. a gentleman coughed in his hanker-chief and flared his nostrils. you were intimidated already.
you tracked down your seat and decided to not let any of it distract you. you needed a good grade on this assessment. you had already bombed your previous test on the imperial era; you don't need another bad grade stacked on top of it. you're acing this test, no matter what, and you're going to absorb this movie so well that it might as well be your favorite.
as you waited for the film to start, you munched on several of the coffee caramels, the caffeine slow to kick in. you shrugged it off. there's a whole bucket of sugar to fuel you through the film.
in midst of biting into a shelf of a chocolate-covered-coffee-bean, you heard a light thud and a hiss, and the quiet muttering of "i'm good, ow." an old man by the stairs called out;
"you alright, son?"
"yes sir," the man said. despite being alright, he was limping to his seat, and you watched him attentively, for there wasn't much else for you to observe. he limped closer and closer to you by row, ticket in his hand and checking the letters on the rows. he stopped at your row, and then walked crookedly and settled down in the seat right next to you.
you chewed on your popcorn as you directed your attention somewhere else, your determination slightly deflated. the film was late into starting, but you were still going strong.
"oh wow," you heard the man mumbled next to you, and looked over to see what he was talking about, nosy. but he was looking at you.
"what?" you said indignantly, immediately dropping the oily popcorn in your hand and wiping at your mouth, feeling oddly self-conscious. but mostly irritated. you'd say you hid your whiplash pretty well when you saw how pretty the man was when you looked over at him. you were so smooth with it. "chocolate on my face?"
"what? oh, no," the man breathed out a small laugh. he's got a soft, shy voice that got your insides feeling like broken tomato bits.
"then what?" you demanded, but not too authoritatively because you didn't want to chase him away. you kept it cool and in control. totally. it was hard to find eye candy in quantico, and the last place you would expect to find someone so pretty is in the theater for a fucking silent film.
even though it was dark, you could still catch the bright blush that crept up the man's neck, but it might be because he felt hot under all those layers. seriously, he was dressed like your grandpa, sweater vest, tie, collared shirt and all, but it was tied together in some kind of way that made it work, and it was the way the man carried himself that made him look youthful in all those ancient clothing.
"nothing," he ducked his head away, "i was just talking out loud."
you didn't have to be sherlock holmes to know that he was lying. "you liar," you accused, wiping your hand even more aggressively over your face. "i do have something on my face, don't i? just tell me if i do!"
"you don't have anything on your face!" he said, an indecisive and uncracked smile playing on his lips. you grumbled and turned back to look at the screen, still waiting for the film to start, popping candy in your mouth. in was silent for a merciful while, until the man said, "did you know that dmitri shostakovich conducted the music for this film and during its first showings in leningrad since the film was silent he came personally and played the piano whenever the soundtrack would be playing?"
you hummed. no you did not.
"i was surprised when i saw you, you don't look over sixty at all," the man continued. you didn't know how to take this piece of information as a compliment or an insult. "whenever i come to these things, it's only me who doesn't have grey hair. well, some people dye it, which looks pretty obvious because you can't really hide age, y'know?"
usually you'd be annoyed. very annoyed, in fact, you'd switch seats to be away from the guy. but this one's got a nice voice, and the moment he sat down you caught a scent to him immediately, that old cashmere and cotton scent that comes from old, thrifted clothes that you'll find dug deep somewhere in your grandmother's basement or in vintage stores, and sugar cookies and mint and coffee. it's a good smell, is all. you weren't being creepy about it.
"i'm not over sixty," you assured him. "just scraping twenty-two."
"oh! i'm twenty-two too!" the man said excitedly. he had child's glee to him, which you found more endearing than annoying. you didn't know why. you didn't know why you were still sitting with the man instead of scurrying three rows away like you would have normally the moment any stranger tried to attempt small talk with you.
maybe you were a changed woman.
"how crazy," you mused. you didn't sound half as interested or excited as the man did, but he had most definitely got your undivided attention. you nature tells you to not show it.
"how did you hear about this movie? i tried to get some of my friends to watch it with me, but none of them were too interested...except emily, she's usually more interested because she can speak russian but she got plans this weekend," his face fell into a thoughtful frown at the end, and the clockwork in your brain started to turn at the mention of 'emily.' was that his girlfriend? special lady? you shouldn't be googling, then.
"my professor created an assessment for this movie," at the man's inquiring look, you explained further, "it's for my russian lit class."
his eyes shone like a fucking diamond at that, as if russian lit was the most exciting thing he had ever heard of in his life. you could tell that you were looking at the kind of guy who would decline a party full of seniors to go read a dictionary at home. "is that like an elective you take? 'cause it's a subject that fascinates me a lot, but the demand for it is so slim that--"
he was cut off by the movie finally starting and flickering to life. you turned away immediately, eyes focused and attention zeroed onto the introduction screen. screw the pretty boy for now, you thought, you might as well pack your things and go back to your hometown if you fuck up this movie's assessment. it needed your attention.
black and white and grimy, a pretty font wrote 'aelita, adapted by alexei tolstoy.' but as soon as the film started, the picture quickly collapsed, blurring and then fading into black. with the audience being so small, there wasn't much commotion but whispers of confusion began to arise as the lights began to bleed more yellow, lighting up the theater more. it was as if the movie was over.
"sorry folks," a voice came from the grainy megaphone above all of them. "some trouble with the tape. we are trying our best, but not sure of our luck. all tickets will be refunded if bought online or you bring your ticket to us for a mark so you can present your current ticket right now at the next showing. thanks for your patience."
you looked exaggeratedly around, and the man in the sweater vest next to you looked equally as disappointed.
"my professor is not going to believe me," you muttered under your breath, but the man caught it anyway and chuckled quietly. you looked down at your still full bucket of popcorn and your large coke. you glanced over to the man next to you, not too smart things lottering around in your head. you travel through the subway, and the ride to your street is not until two hours. you weren't going to spend it morosely eating popcorn in the waiting lobby.
"is emily your girlfriend?" you asked suddenly. there was no point in being shy. the man's mouth unhinged from his jaw immediately, and you stared at him. his cheeks quickly stained an innocent pink.
"what?" he squeaked, his voice a higher pitch, caught off-guard. "no! no, she-she's my coworker!" he sounded almost offended.
this took you by surprise. you didn't know people who were close to their coworkers existed. "so you don't have a girlfriend?"
the blush on the man's face kept getting brighter and brighter. you bit your lip to keep from smiling like a fool. with how endeared you were by him, it's strange to think that you don't even know his name yet. it was rare for you to really be so mindful and think such soft things about somebody, especially to a stranger.
you were a changed woman. but maybe it's because of the coffee caramels messing with your head. sugar and caffeine tend to do that.
"no," the man said, then cleared his throat. he was fiddling with his fingers, an obvious stim. "no, i don't have a girlfriend."
"sweet," you grinned, "then no one would mind if i take you on a date, would they?"
he choked and got engulfed in a coughing fit, bending over in his seat. the red of his sweater vest nearly blinded you but you patted his back supportively. when his coughing ceased and he sat back up again, his eyes avoided yours for a while as he fought to keep the redness in his face down before he looked at you again.
"so?" you raised your eyebrow. "the night doesn't wait, pretty boy."
the nickname just slipped out of your mouth, and you cringed at the weight of it. how out of pocket. you were going to go home and contemplate this conversation later. but right now, you were trying to take out probably the sweetest looking boy you've ever seen, and that was a more important matter as of.
"okay," he said, and that was that.
"okay," you repeated. "let's start with finishing this, yeah?" you looked down at your bothersomely big bucket of popcorn. "we can walk to the park and eat it and feed it to the ducks."
"actually, it's not safe for ducks to consume popcorn because it causes digestive issues especially if consumed in large quantities and disrupts their natural diet," the man recited matter-of-factly, blinking at you obliviously as if he just didn't acted like a fucking android. you huffed out a laugh. handsome and smart. pretty much a package deal.
"the popcorn will be just for us then," you promised, standing up. he followed suit, as a lone line of people started to exit the theater. "i hope you aren't a serial killer in disguise," you said jokingly, but not really, because that was a genuine threat. he laughed. it was a sweet, syrupy sound that you could soak up and not get sick of for a long time.
"that's ironic," he mumbled, and it flew past your head, you being too busy maneuvering out of the rows.
"what was that?"
"nothing," he smiled, bright and easy. the initial nervousness was already beginning to melt away. when you were side by side, his hand accidentally brushed yours and when you looked up at him, he was already looking another way, pretending to be distracted by the movie posters but the red in his ears and neck gave it away. you smiled to yourself and grabbed his hand, holding your bucket of popcorn in the other.
"i forgot," you said, suddenly. his head whipped around to face you, but not before lingering his gaze at your intertwined hands. "i didn't get your name."
it was a foolish thing to say, you were holding a man's hand and you were pressed up side-by-side against him and you don't even know his name. he smiled softly, though, like he didn't mind. "i'm spencer reid."
"i'm y/n y/l/n."
"hi y/n," spencer said. you exited the theater and he started slightly swinging your joined hands. you laughed, the popcorn and candy in the bucket rattling and threatening to spill but you didn't care. "i'm a little disappointed," he said, pouting a little bit, bottom lip jutting out. "i was excited for the movie."
you breathed out an incredulous laugh. what a guy.
"i wasn't," you said, honestly. yours and spencer's arms were still swinging, and you resisted the uncharacteristic giggle bubbling at your throat. "rather be doing this instead." unexpected date at the park with a pretty boy in a red sweater vest or a boring silent film? the answer sounded pretty obvious to you.
"hm," spencer hummed, amused. "i guess i can catch the movie some other time."
"you can catch it with me," you blurted, and it sounded too early to say. you haven't had a proper conversation with the guy yet, you didn't know what he does and how he is, you didn't know whether or not he has a cat or a dog or a parrot or a ferret or if his room is kept tidy or messy, and you didn't know how much you were going to like him once the night is over. asking for a second date when the first one hadn't even started felt like too much, but it also felt like the right thing to say.
and if it's right, it's good enough for you.
spencer smiled shyly. when you turned right on the street, he pulled you back by your hand and redirected you left. "let's go the scenic route," he said, casually, and you could tell by the magenta tinge in his cheeks and the way he was firmly looking forward, avoiding your eyes that he wasn't feeling as casual as he sounded.
"want some of my popcorn?" you offered, feeling the large bucket was burdening you.
"oh, no thanks," spencer said. "i'm sure the pigeons will appreciate it more than me."
"does popcorn ruin their digestive system and disrupt their natural diet, too?"
spencer popped a large grin. it sat beautiful on his pretty face. "you listened," he said happily, and it felt like a large airbag had just inflated in your lungs. "no, i think pigeons are too used to picking our food, especially those in the city," a long pause, and "in fact, pigeons have a stronger digestive system than most birds due to adaptation, but the strongest out of all of them are vultures, whose stomach acid are so strong it doesn't get sick e eating rotten and bacteria-infested meats."
you hummed. you wished you had paid closer attention to what he said, but instead you paid attention to the smooth sound of his voice and how nice it sounded. well. you'll get there one day.
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magicalmysteries777 · 3 months
Text
"You're clueless, you know that?" - Reader x Eddie Munson & Reader x Steve Harrington (fake)
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Summary: You agree to accompany Steve to Enzo's for Valentine's Day with only one shared goal in mind - to make Eddie so jealous he has no choice but to have the one conversation he's being avoiding.
Pairings: F!Reader x Steve Harrington & F!Reader x Eddie Munson.
Chapter: 1 of 1.
W/C: 2314.
A/N: Happy Valentines Day, besties! This trope paired with Steve and Eddie has had me in a chokehold for a while now and I'm so happy that the lil ADHD gremlin in my brain has finally let me write the damn thing. <3
This one-shot can also be found on AO3 here.
“You really think that’ll work? Pretending to go on a date with you?” you asked, leaning against the counter at Family Video.
“It better work. Personally, I’m sick of hearing you pine over him. He’s had a thing for you ever since you joined Hellfire but he’s completely clueless when it comes to all the hints you’ve dropped,” Robin chimed in without looking up from the ‘returns’ pile of videotapes she was sorting through.
Clueless didn’t even begin to cut it.
You’d known about Eddie’s crush on you for months now, ever since Dustin slipped up and spilled the beans at lunch one day. The poor kid made you swear on your own life that you wouldn’t tell Eddie you knew.
True to your word, you kept the secret and began dropping hints instead. Eddie couldn’t read the room to save his life.
Any time you caught him staring, he’d break eye contact before you could smile back at him. Any time your hands accidentally touched, he’d move his hand away and play it off if you didn’t keep your hand perfectly still.
“I think it’s perfect,” Steve smiled. “There’s nothing like a bit of jealously to make you realise what you want.”
“I dunno,” you mumbled, chewing your cheek while you weighed up your options.
“When he sees you all dolled up, thinking it’s for me, the dots will connect. Trust me.”
“Fine, I’ll find out when he’s working.”
-
Steve’s plan had been in the back of your mind the whole time you’d been sitting around the table with your fellow Hellfire members. It was a long game of highs and lows all night. Despite the distraction, you’d manage to come out of the battle victorious with a mere five health points left. The party, albeit a little bruised and battered, was one step closer to defeating Myrkul and Eddie was in a good mood.
It took the usual fifteen minutes to pack up Eddie’s maps, dice, tokens, and other various game pieces before you climbed into the passenger side of his van. “Sorry for the mess,” Eddie apologised.
“You say that every week and yet you never clean it.”
“I do, it just gets messy again,” he smirked.
You were halfway home when you glanced over at Eddie. His hair was frizzy, sticking up in places from all the near misses in battle where he’d had his hands running through it. The rings on his left hand were glowing gently from the reflection of his lit cigarette as he used it to control the steering wheel. His right hand was methodically fiddling with the busted cassette player that he’d been meaning to fix for months. As always when Eddie was concentrating, his tongue was sticking out and resting against his top lip.
“Got it!” he exclaimed as Rainbow in the Dark started blasting from the speaker, a huge grin spread across his face.
“When are you going to buy a new one?” you chuckled, prodding at the battered box.
“Stop touching it,” he slapped your hand away. “It’ll start crackling again. I’ve picked up some overtime next weekend, I’m hoping the gents will be tipping big to impress their dates.”
“No Valentine’s plan with anyone special then?”
“Nope, just work. Doubt there’s anyone out there who would want to spend their Valentine’s Day with the ‘Freak of Hawkins’ anyway.”
“You’d be surprised, some people like their men a little freaky.”
“What about you? Any plans?” he asked, the change in tone rather subtle.
For a moment, you weren’t sure if you were going to go through with the plan. Steve’s words echoed through your mind listed the pros and cons. ‘Trust me.’
“Yeah, I’ve got a date at Enzo's. At least I don’t have to worry about it going bad now if you’re working, you can come over and scare him off for me.”
“That’s great. Wow, a date. Um, yeah, I’ll fend him off for you if things go pear-shaped. Do I, uh, know the guy?” he stuttered.
“I don’t want to jinx it,” you answered, remembering Robin's claims that a little bit of mystery would be the key to the whole plan working.
“Of course,” Eddie agreed, a sarcastically dumb look plastered on his face. You couldn’t help but notice that this was exactly how he used to act when Dustin mentioned Steve. “Would you look at that? Here we are. Once again, dropped off in one piece, as requested.”
“You okay, Ed?” you ask, one eyebrow raised.
“Yep. Fine. Tired,” he mumbled through an unconvincing yawn. “Long game. I’m gonna go and, uh, get some sleep. Night.”
-
“And he said it exactly like that?” Steve asked.
“Yes, Steve, how many times do I have to go through it? He basically kicked me out of the van,” you answered.
“It’s definitely working.”
“Are you sure?”
“One hundred percent. Wait until he finds out it’s me, he’s gonna freak.”
“He might not react at all. Believe it or not, he is professional at work.”
“Bet on it?”
“Shut up.”
-
Eddie had been an asshole all week.
Jeff and Gareth got the worst of it. You, however, had been getting the silent treatment. It was Thursday lunchtime when Eddie finally acknowledged you again.
“So, what are your plans this weekend?” Dustin asked Mike.
“Movies with El then dinner, you?”
“Arcade with Will. What about you, Eddie?”
“Work and band, why?”
“It’s called small talk,” Dustin answered. “What is with you this week?”
“Nothing, I’m fine,” he snapped.
“Tell your face that, man,” added Jeff.
“Lay off it. Why don’t you ask her what she’s doing this weekend instead and leave me alone?” Eddie prompted, gesturing in your direction. He did not stick around to hear the answer, walking away dramatically.
“Well, what are you doing?” asked Dustin.
“I’ve got a date,” you answered quickly and quietly, sinking into your seat as a sense of guilt began to creep up on you.
“You what?!” asked Gareth.
“I said I’ve got a date.”
“Yeah, I heard you. The fuck do you mean you’ve got a date? With who?”
“Does it matter?” you ask asked.
“Evidently it does. I’ve been taking the brunt of his crap all week and you’re telling me it’s because you’re going on a date?”
“How was I supposed to know he’d react like this?” you quickly try to defend yourself.
“Are you blind?” Jeff asks.
“No, but he is. I’ve dropped hints. Lots of them. If he doesn’t want to acknowledge it then that’s on him.”
-
“Wow,” smiled Steve, looking you up and down. He took your hand, albeit rather dramatically, and began leading you to the car.
“Save it for the restaurant, you dingus. Does this look okay then?” you ask.
“The dress alone might kill him, never mind the heels and hair.”
Ten minutes later, Steve parked up outside Enzo's.
“When we get in there, sit with your back to the bar. You’re about to get the full Harrington charm, okay?” he asked.
“Got it.”
“Hi there, table for two under Harrington,” Steve told the hostess.
“Follow me.”
“Here we are,” the hostess said as she gestured to a small table. “Here are your menus, the waiter will be over to take your order shortly.”
“Thank you,” you replied, taking the seat that Steve had pulled out for you.
“So,” you began.
“So,” Steve replied with a grin.
“I’m not going to lie, Steve, I feel really awkward.”
“I can tell,” he responded. “Relax. We’re just two friends, dressed up, and having a nice meal. Loosen up a little and have fun, or this isn’t going to work.”
You tried to relax, really, you did. But you couldn’t help shake the feeling that Eddie was burning holes into the back of your head with his staring.
“Welcome to Enzo's, my name is Ruben and I’ll be your server this evening. Any drinks to start?”
“Sparkling water for me, and…” Steve prompted.
“Lemonade, please.”
“Awesome, I’ll get that put in at the bar for you. Any starters today?”
“Do you-” Steve began, turning his attention back to you.
“More of a dessert person,” you answer.
“Me too,” smiled Ruben. “What mains would you like?”
“Lasagne for me, please,” answered Steve.
“Chicken Alfredo, please.”
“Awesome. I’ll get all that put in for you, enjoy your evening.”
“Thank you, ‘preciate that,” Steve told him before he left the table.
After a couple of minutes of the usual “how was work?” and “how was school?” small talk, Steve’s gaze quickly shot behind you as he sat up a little bit straighter.
“Here’s your lemonade,” Eddie announced, placing the glass down in front of you.
“Thanks, Eddie. How’s your shift?” you asked with a smile.
“So-so. Started going downhill about twenty minutes ago,” he answered.
“Nothing worse than a shitty Friday shift,” Steve chimed in.
“Evening rush,” Eddie responded, unwilling to meet Steve’s gaze. “Everything okay over here?”
“Great, thank you,” you respond.
“Harrington,” Eddie muttered, placing Steve’s water in front of him with a little bit more force than he did the lemonade, before heading back to the bar.
“He won’t even look at me, this is working even better than I thought,” Steve chuckled.
-
One hour and one chicken alfredo later, Ruben returned.
“Well you two are looking cosy over here,” he told you. Steve had been giving you cues on how to sit and when to laugh all evening. “How about that dessert? I highly recommend the ‘brownie and ice cream for two.’ Chef special tonight.”
“Sounds perfect,” answered Steve.
“Alrighty, that’ll be about ten to fifteen minutes. Any more drinks?”
“The same again, please,” you answer.
A couple of minutes later, Steve gave another instruction.
“Rest your left arm on the table.”
“What?”
“Now.”
Steve let out a sudden laugh and adjusted himself in his seat. He placed his arm on the table, his fingertips slightly brushing against your own.
A loud crashing noise from behind you had heads rolling to see what was going on. Every pair of eyes in the restaurant landed on Eddie.
“Sorry folks,” he announced. Eddie quickly began picking up the larger shards of glass whilst another bartender brought over cloths and a broom.
“Hook, line, and sinker,” Steve whispered, loud enough for only you to hear.
-
You really were getting the full Harrington charm, as promised. Steve had been feeding you brownie on and off for ten minutes, his glancing over to Eddie quickly now and again.
“It’s almost time,” Steve whispered.
“Time for what?”
“The grand finale.”
Steve leaned in slightly and wiped the side of your mouth gently with his thumb. “Ice cream,” he smirked.
“Is that really necessary?”
“One hundred percent. On my cue, you’re going to excuse yourself to go to the bathroom,” he began.
“But-”
“If this whole fake date has gone to plan, which by the way has been lovely, then I do believe Munson won’t let you make it that far. Go now.”
As instructed, you excused yourself from the table and made your way towards the bathroom. Just as you got to the door you felt a hand close softly around your wrist.
“Hey, can we talk?” Eddie asked.
“Everything okay?”
“No, actually, it’s not,” he answered. Eddie glanced around before pulling you through a door labelled ‘staff only’.
“Eddie, wha-”
“You can’t date Steve.”
“I can date whoever I like Eddie,” you respond.
“Why him?” he asked, his hand still wrapped lightly around your wrist.
“Why not?”
“Because,” he began, pausing in thought. “Because he’s… he’s got a reputation. Surely you’ve heard all the rumours?”
“And we both know him well enough to know he’s not that person anymore,” you answer, your gaze locking with Eddie’s who, surprisingly, held it.
“You just can’t, please,” he pleaded.
“Give me a good enough reason as to why I shouldn’t go back out there and I won’t.”
Eddie stayed silent for a few moments, his big, brown eyes locked on yours. The small staff room became stuffy all of a sudden, the air so thick it felt like you could barely breathe. You held your ground, waiting for him to speak, but he didn’t. You stared back at Eddie, your eyes pleading with him to just say something. Anything.
You broke your gaze from Eddie’s and turned towards the door, ready to give up and go home. Eddie’s grip on your wrist tightened and he pulled you back towards him, using his free hand to cup your face as his lips met yours.
You weren’t sure how long you’d been there, Eddie kissing you, but it felt like forever. The tension in the air vanished, leaving you with a cozy feeling deep in your stomach, where the butterflies used to live. 
“You can do better than him. You deserve better than him. You deserve someone who knows that you take extra sugar in your coffee when you’re studying. Someone who knows that you’re a completely evil genius in the best way possible when it comes to D&D. Someone who knows you’d rather be in bed with a book at-” he glanced at his watch, “nine o’clock at night. Someone who apparently isn’t very good at making the first move.”
“You’re clueless, you know that?”
“I am?”
“Yeah,” you replied, leaning in to kiss him again.
If it wasn’t for Ruben who knows how long you would have stood there, entwined together, lost in the moment.
“Hey man, you heading home?” Eddie asked casually, placing a little distance between the two of you.
“I was, but turns out I’m staying late. Guy with the hair on table twelve tipped me a hundred bucks to finish your bar shift and fetch a fresh brownie out. Said you ‘owe him one’ and you can ‘square it up later’. Brownie will be out in five. Enjoy.”
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secretsecretbunny · 3 months
Text
Just friends: stray kids smau.
Part 1.5: The Rumor.
paring: lee minho x f!reader - roommate!skz
genre: fluff, angst, roommates au.
warnings for this chapter: angst, cussing, alcohol mention, assault mention, sex mention, fighting.
Notes: ⚠️THIS IS A FLASHBACK CHAPTER. PLEASE READ THE CHARACTER INTRO AND PART ONE FOR THIS TO MAKE SENSE. ⚠️
College. The origins of your friend group date back to your high school days, when you, Chan, and Changbin first bonded over your shared love of music and movies. From then on, the three of you were practically inseparable, supporting each other every step of the way. 
Come freshman year of college, Chan and Bin befriended Minho, someone they met in class, but your friendship with Minho began later on that same semester when you were assigned that fated project together. After you and Minho got over your distaste for each other, your friend group became four, constantly together and causing trouble, much to Chan's dismay. It stayed that way until the start of sophomore year when Chan started inviting his cousin Felix to join in on your hangouts, and then Felix invited Jisung and Hyunjin, and finally Hyunjin started bringing Seungmin and Jeongin around. Eventually, you were a close knit group of nine wild idiots.
You had always been a platonically touchy person, craving physical contact and intimacy in all your friendships. Whether it was holding hands, cuddling, or simply sitting close together, you found comfort in the nearness of your friends. As a result, your circle embraced this trait and soon enough, it became the norm to see you all piled up in a cozy corner, phones out, scrolling mindlessly or studying together. 
Halfway through sophomore year came the rumor. It had started at a party, most of your group was drunk save for Innie and Seungmin who were merely tipsy. In the midst of the lively party at the frat house, you discovered a secluded nook, packed with an assortment of soft bean bag chairs and pillows, which became the perfect setting for your drunken cuddle puddle. 
You were sitting between Chan's legs, your back leaning against his chest while he stroked your hair. Jisung was sat the same way between your legs as your hand rubbed his arm while you scrolled through TikTok with the other one. Felix lay on both of yours and Chan's thighs, Minho rested a shoulder on Chan's left side and Jeongin did so likewise to his right. The remaining members laid across each other nearby. You were all touching in some way or another just vibing, chatting, and giggling. 
After a while you started noticing people looking your way, whispering, laughing, and staring, but in your drunken state, you didn't think anything of it. Suddenly Chan sat up straight, lurching you forward a bit. "We need to go." He said sternly, looking at his phone, eyes wide, anger and concern written on his face. "What? Why?" you asked, clearly confused. Minho looked at Chan's phone over his shoulder, his face taking on the same expression. "What the fuck..." he whispered. "What?" you asked again. "It's nothing. Let's just get out of here, okay?" Chan reiterated. "What's going on, let me see!" you giggled, reaching for Chan's phone, he pulled it out of your reach. "It's not important." he lied. You pouted "come onnnnn, Channie." you whined. "y/n..." After struggling to get hold of his phone for a moment, you eventually succeeded but were taken aback by the unexpected image on the screen, making your face drop.
On his phone sat a photo posted on the school's official Facebook page. A photo of the nine of you, mere moments ago, with the word 'whore' scribbled sloppily across your face, and 'simp' scribbled on each of theirs. The caption read "I bet they pass her around like a joint". As you scanned the comments, reading each one, you noticed a common theme..
- "Ew. I bet those boys are infected with something now 🤢"
- "She's probably looser than a child's tooth lmfao"
- "bet she's had more turns than a door knob."
- "I heard she sleeps with professors too 😬"
- "wonder if she gets paid for it, I heard the two pretty boys are rich."
- "how many of them do you think she's taken at once? 😏"
- "at least she's hot, you think they'd share her with me?"
When you finally stopped reading the comments, all eight of the boys were looking at the phone with you, their faces reflecting a deep sense of horror and disbelief. Your eyes burned with tears as your face heated up with embarrassment, your heart racing and your mind filled with thoughts of shame and self-consciousness. Chan took his phone back and stood up, pulling you up with him. The boys followed suit, trailing behind you as Chan lead you out the door by your arm, guiding you through the crowded frat house with a firm grip. None of you even bothered grabbing your jackets from the corridor, the cold air outside nipping at your skin. It seemed nearly everyone there had gotten the notification about the post. They all stared and whispered as you made your way out of the party. 
Your group's steadfast pace didn't stop until you were off campus, Felix mentioning that his family had a property that they could go to instead of heading back to their respective dorms. The boys came to a decision that you would all take the bus there, the next one arriving in somewhere around 30 minutes from then. You hadn't said a word since leaving the frat house, your eyes glued to the ground, unable to make eye contact with any of them. Changbin had given you his hoodie to keep you warm as you all waited for the bus.
"Who the fuck posted that?!" Changbin finally snapped, breaking the silence.
"I don't know but I'm going to kick their ass." Seungmin chimed in.
"No one's kicking anyone's ass.." Chan growled.
Minho scoffed. "Speak for yourself, Chris." 
The four of them began bickering before Jisung finally spoke up "SHUT THE FUCK UP! YOU'RE UPSETTING HER!!" he shouted at them. They went silent, looking at you with concern. Tears were streaming down your face as Jeongin rubbed your back gently and Jisung squatted in front of where you sat on the bench, holding your hands firmly. Hyunjin and Felix stood off to the side, scrolling through the comments on the post, attempting damage control by responding to negative remarks.
"It's gonna be okay, bug. I promise." Jisung whispered, rubbing the tops of your hands with his thumbs.
Jeongin stroked circles on your back. "Try not to let it get to you, noona."
The bus ride to the house was silent except for Felix and Hyunjin whispering quietly to each other while still engrossed in their phones. Minho sat next to you, his arm wrapped around your shoulder, holding you close as the dark scenery outside passed by in a blur.
The bus dropped you all off at the bus stop nearest to the house, but you still had to walk about 10 minutes to get there. Once you arrived, Felix punched in the code and ushered everyone inside. The interior was chilly as no one currently lived there full time, so the heating system didn't need to be on. Felix clicked it on and turned on the lights. "My parents were just here a couple of weeks ago when they came to visit, so there's probably still snacks and drinks if you guys want anything." He said, leading everyone to the living room. 
You didn't speak again until a couple of hours had passed, everyone submerged in their phones, most likely still doing damage control. You broke the silence. "I'm so sorry.." you whispered, though in the thick silence, it was deafening. As you sat there, your eyes refused to leave the torn fabric of your jeans, as if searching for an answer that only they could provide. Your knees were pulled to your chest as if trying to shield yourself.
Hyunjin spoke for the first time in what seemed like hours "What? Why are you sorry?" he asked, sounding almost offended. "You didn't do anything wrong."
"I- I should have known how it would look to everyone.. I'm always hanging all over you guys.." your eyes started started tearing up again. "how many relationships have I ruined for you guys? ...you never date.. is it because people see me all over you? How long have people been assuming this? Was this even the first post? What if they-" you were rambling when Felix stopped you "Hey hey hey, we all hang all over each other, bubs. It's not just you and you shouldn't be putting blame on yourself like that." Seungmin nodded in agreement "Those fuckasses don't even know what they're talking about, all they have is sex on the brain, obviously it's clouding their common fucking sense." he spat out, arms crossed over his chest. "Plus anyone who thinks physical affection is only sexual surely doesn't have a fully developed brain." Jeongin chimed in. Your hands were shaking, something that didn't go unnoticed by Minho. "Take a deep breath, princess." he said softly, taking your hands "this is gonna pass, everyone will forget about this soon enough." 
But it didn't pass, and no one forgot. When you all went back to your classes on Monday, the whispers and stares were seemingly worse. Word had spread like wildfire and it felt like everyone knew about the rumor, even the professors and staff. It continued like that for weeks before things gradually got worse.
Guys would not leave you alone, all of them thinking you were easy and that they had a chance. They would get in your space, whistle at you, even straight up ask you for sexual favors. You even had to stop wearing skirts because guys would flip it up when they'd walk by you. Their behavior eventually caused your friends to get into fights. First it was Changbin, landing a punch to a guy who had grabbed your ass, successfully breaking the guy's nose. Then it was Seungmin, full on kicking a guy to the ground who dared to lift your dress to check the color of your panties. Jisung and Minho followed, teaming up on a few guys who had you cornered against a wall in the back of the library. Even sunshine boy Felix found himself in a fight or two. They all repeatedly got in trouble for violence while those creeps got away scot-free.
Eventually you started skipping your classes and began avoiding your friends. You even stopped staying at the big house and held yourself captive in your tiny dorm room, ignoring their calls and texts. Tensions ran high between the boys, they were always arguing and fighting, their group was completely falling apart and they hadn't seen you in almost two weeks.
Finally, after weeks of being ignored by you, who had suddenly become distant and unresponsive, Chan and Minho decided that they have had enough. Chan organized a group meeting in order to confront the issue head-on. Since you were still ignoring everyone's texts and calls at this point, Minho took matters into his own hands by physically going over to your dorm and practically breaking in just so he could retrieve you. "You can't just fucking ignore us like this, y/n! Do you know how worried we were?!" he said, his voice raised. You said nothing. "Chan wants to talk to everyone. We're going. Now." He stated, almost a demand. He threw some decent clothes at you for you to change into before basically dragging you off campus, and getting you an uber to the house. 
When Minho got you into the house, he lead you to the living room where everyone sat, quietly bickering. "Got her." Minho stated as you both entered the living room. Everyone went quiet, looking at you. "Jesus, bug, you look like you haven't slept in weeks!" Jisung said as he got up, pulling you into a hug.
Seungmin broke the silence that followed. "So, what, why the hell are we here acting like we're having some sort of twisted intervention?" 
Chan sighed, clearly frustrated. "I'm tired of this tearing us apart. This needs to stop. We're constantly fighting with each other and other students. Hell, Seungmin and Minho are one fight away from expulsion for fucks sake!!" he yelled.
Seungmin raised his voice back "yeah well y/n is just avoiding the fucking situation while we all fight for her ass!"
Okay, that one pissed you off. "Who the fuck asked you to fight for me?! Did you even stop to think for one god damn moment that I'm removing myself from the group to stop the fucking rumor!?!" you shouted. The room fell silent as everyone's eyes turned towards you, their faces etched with shock and disbelief. Never before had they heard you raise your voice, and rarely did you even show a hint of anger, especially not towards them. "Am I just supposed to continue like everything is normal?! Continue ruining your lives and reputations!? Having me around you only made shit worse!! Tell me, have you even gotten into fights with other students since I disappeared?!" You screamed. More silence followed. "Yeah.. that's what I fucking thought.." you mumbled, voice cracking. "Having me around will only make shit worse.."
Felix broke the next bout of silence. "but we want you around, y/n. We need you around." Now his voice was cracking.
"Our group isn't the same without you, sweetheart" Chan followed up, his voice barely above a whisper. "You're our glue." 
"I miss my smoke buddy.." Jisung added.
"I miss my noona" Jeongin followed up.
Hyunjin chimed in next "who's going to judge people and gossip with me if you're not around?" 
"Yeah, and it's not like these guys will watch cheesy dramas and romcoms with me.." Changbin all but whined.
"I mean I GUESS I miss you or whatever.." Seungmin grumbled, turning his face away to hide the tears threatening to spill from his eyes.
"Well, I definitely really fucking miss you, princess." Minho whispered, wiping a fresh tear from your cheek.
You let out a shaky breath. "What do we do? If I'm around you things just get worse.. they'll never stop talking about it. They'll never leave us alone. There's a new post about us almost every week! They're not going to let it go and if I keep going to class I'm just going to keep getting assaulted and you guys are going to get expelled for fighting!" You cried. "I miss you guys so fucking much it hurts!" you were full on sobbing at this point. "But what are we supposed to do besides drift apart?" Your last question came out as a whisper.
There was that silence.. Jisung was the one to break it again. "I mean.. what if we just.. dropped out?" he suggested.
Everyone looked between each other. "Well, I mean.. I'm going to be honest, I'm not even planning on using my degree." Chan said. "I've already started producing music in my spare time, and I know Bin and Ji are into it too, I'll have no problem building us a platform with it." 
Seungmin shrugged. "I'm already in the process of starting my own business, and people seem interested. Shouldn't be an issue for me either."
"To be honest classes have been stressful with having a job at Bean Artisan, I like coffee a lot more than school, I skip half of my classes anyway.." Jeongin said with a shrug.
Minho looked at you. "I've been offered a full time teaching position at In Motion Studios. I wasn't going to take it because of school but.. I'd like to."
"and Felix and I have money coming out of our asses, who needs college?" Hyunjin added, Felix nodded in agreement before adding "and my family really wouldn't mind giving us the house. They only ever used this place to visit me because I was staying at the dorms."
You looked at all of them, your lip quivering. "why... why would you all drop out because of me..? I'm not worth that.." you murmured.
They all spoke together in a cacophony of convictions, each one trying to drown out the others with their own certainty. The air was thick with the clashing of various 'of course you are's, 'don't say that's, and 'we want to's. You chuckled through tears as you heard Seungmin throw in a "who cares, fuck the system!"
"and we can take care of you, bubs!" Felix said "I won't even notice a shift in my account if I started spending on you"
You shook your head "No, no. If we do this, I'll find work. I.. think I know a girl who could get me into something that pays well.."
The steady rhythm of the clock's ticking filled the quiet space, emphasizing the pause in conversation.
"Sooooo, are we doing this?" Jisung questioned with a smile, looking to you for the answer.
The attention in the room shifted from each other to focus entirely upon you; every eye turned towards you like a compass needle pointing north - making this moment yours alone to decide what happens next. They waited patiently (and perhaps also anxiously) for your answer to set the conversation in motion once again.
You looked between them, your eyes jumping from one boy to another, finally landing on Minho's encouraging gaze, his pleading eyes and nod of approval filling you with the confidence to finally speak. "...fuck it. Let's do this." you decided.
With wide grins spreading across all their faces, Chan quickly rounded everyone up until they were enveloped within one massive embrace where you sat snuggly at its heart. "Don't you ever disappear on us like that again, sweetheart. You worried us to death." Chan cooed, his chin resting on your head as he stroked your hair.
"Yes, daaaad~" you teased.
As Chan rolled his eyes, his subtle smile gave way to the amusement he felt, prompting the boys to snicker.
After a few weeks of adjustment, things finally started feeling like they were back to normal again, albeit a new kind of normalcy that everyone had to get used to. With everyone now living under the same roof, you all began to grow closer and more tight-knit as time went on. More jokes were shared as well as quality time, and you didn't have to worry about anyone judging your group for being affectionate with each other. Everything just seemed to fall into place and you were content. Happy even.
The only stress you had was brought in the form of your newly acquired job. But that's a story for another time..
mlist || part two
a/n: hopefully this will hold you guys over until I finish part two!! Please please let me know how you liked this by liking, reblogging, or leaving me a comment/ask!!
I don't do taglists!
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dyinglikeicarus · 3 months
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Small backstory comic for the beans <3
I wanted Greta and Hanso's backstory to be based on (ofc) Hansel and Gretel's story and swiftsidestories complied giving it a suuper awesome twist and adapting it to Echo's world. The witch was, in this case, their parent's 'Anathemas'. In this world, an anathema is something very similar to the jungian concept of a shadow so here, they ate the twin's parents and took their place, taking the role of the witch that tried feeding them junk food and looots of sweets so they could later eat them. That was until Mijhail arrived and saved the kids, taking care of them from that point onward, until some things happened (still a spoiler for the party, so I can't say more atm)
This comic is a small bit that happened after the rescue, when the kids were in the care of Mijhail. What happened was still a little triggering for Greta. But Mijhail had the situation under control as the kind he is.
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pendragonsclotpole · 3 months
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succession but bruce wayne is 45 and tired of having to attend pointless board meetings when he’d much rather be plotting how to get rid of all the stupid money he has (he’s tried everything, invested all of his funds into gotham, secretly funded the justice league and hid it from his tax returns in hopes that the irs would bust him. spoiler: they don’t, they consider his anonymous donations to be charity AND WRITE HIM TAX BREAKS. he’s even given everyone at WE a living wage, offered free daycare, amazing healthcare, in hopes of making running WE so expensive it drives down profits, but all it does it ramp of productivity and stock prices. he’s in too deep. let one of his children handle it pls).
candidate #1: dick grayson-wayne, bruce wayne’s eldest boy, former cop, circus acrobat, college dropout and style icon (TM). he immediately takes himself out of the running when a pap keeps calling him “richard” and he shouts back “dick.” that’s his name, but no one cares. also his pics from his mullet era resurface. the world is never the same again and the board summarily agrees he’s too divisive.
candidate #2: jason todd-wayne. initially the main contender when alleged footage of him breaking into a very important wayne warehouse leaks. he’s shouting “reclaim the means of production.” wayne enterprise stock falls but the internet is in favor. he’s unfortunately taken out of the running as all legal records indicate—he’s dead? but there’s cute footage of a 13 year old jason todd ardently defending the historical accuracy and superb writing of jane austen’s pride and prejudice. he loudly proclaims he’ll marry mr. darcy at the end. his candidacy remains very popular and the internet starts publishing memes about converting to satanism and practicing necromancy to revive jason todd-wayne.
candidate #3: tim drake. a popular front runner for the old guard of gotham as tim’s also the heir of the drake fortune. unfortunately, he runs away screaming every time someone comes up to him asking about the possibility of taking over WE full time. a major scandal breaks out when he’s caught buying something in a shady alleyway, and people are convinced he’s another partying rich boy. until the full footage leaks and it’s revealed he was buying coffee beans from a barista in the alleyway behind a newly opened coffee shop. multiple coffee shops then make posts online that yes, bruce wayne has called each of them and offered them copious sums of money to NOT serve tim drake or anyone representing tim drake caffeinated drinks after 5pm and before 5pm. many of the videos feature framed photographs of fake wanted posters featuring a very tired looking tim. tim, on a caffeine withdrawal posts a tiktok ranting about the injustice of tyrannical parents think this energy:
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and the hashtag save tim wayne trends.
candidate #4: damian wayne. except as a twelve year old he’s not really in the running, except he’s the only wayne by blood so some members of the board are gunning for him. one of them kidnaps him, huge mistake, and footage leaks of him chasing his kidnappers with a katana? appears. he’s officially out of the running but it also fuels calls for bruce to be liberated so he can actually parent his children. joke’s on them, damian’s damianess is 99% thanks to richard grayson.
candidate #5: cassandra cain-wayne. she takes herself out of the running but she’s a dark horse because everyone loves her youtube channel Cass Cayne and her business decisions for brand deals are top tier. bruce makes background appearances and the internet learns cass is def the favorite.
candidate #6: stephanie brown. she’s not a wayne? people think? are 99% sure? but like she’s always there? she dated tim drake? maybe? she calls bruce dad!
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utilitycaster · 5 months
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There's this weird phenomenon where the people who are really, really invested in Campaign 3 being The Best try to argue that it's the most closely bonded party. when in fact the absolute strongest material with Bells Hells thus far is them realizing with a shock that they've spent almost three months alternating between "my way or the highway" and smoothing things over to the point that they almost shatter along with Ashton and realize that they absolutely cannot go on a time-sensitive, mission-critical journey to save the world without stopping to take a team-bonding vacation.
And to be clear, this rips, but it feels as though while Campaign 1 and Campaign 2 fans might disagree on their favorite campaigns, they do like their campaigns for what they actually are and simply have different preferences with regards to what kind of story they like. This particular flavor of Campaign 3 fans, and there's a decent number of them, only care about winning on the most kindergarten-ass "all you need is love 🥺" axis (also, shades of the bean-counting/points approach to media analysis) but as a result they put forward an idea of the campaign that's simply not the reality and it's like, do you like Campaign 3? Or do you like the fanfiction version of it you wrote in your head based on the first 10 episodes and into which you have slowly dissolved your brain? There's plenty of valid reasons to enjoy or even prefer the campaign, but it's easily the most dysfunctional party and that's fine!
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piratefishmama · 1 year
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Crossing the Line | Part 5
The odds of finding one feral little metalhead in such a large city without any starting point to go off of were slim at best. Okay that was being generous, the odds were basically non-existent as Steve had been telling Robin for the past hour as they wandered the streets seemingly without aim.
“Rob, we should just buy the tickets and see his band! What’s the worst that can happen?”
“We lose our hearing to people who can’t play their instruments properly, you get rejected publicly, someone throws up on us, we wind up in the mosh pit and you get your THIRD concussion, someone spills their drink on me, or on you, you get recognised and publicly ridiculed for wearing a goddamn sweater vest to a metal gig because I saw you pack your bag what in god’s name, Steven.”
“It’s comfortable.” Steve grumbled in response, momentarily subdued by all of her good points “at least it’s monotonal.” It was a grey knit number, one of his softest. “And I was gonna put a black shirt under it.”
“Yep, no, we’re not doing that, you’re not wearing that. If we must go to the gig and I do mean if we must, you’re going to need another outfit, so we’re going to spend today shopping for that, then head back to the apartment and strategize. We can divide and conquer, you take one half of the city, I’ll take the other, we meet in the middle for coffee.”
“…One half of a city. Where even is the middle of it? How is that a plan?”
“Not the best first plan but it’s the planning stage of the plan, and the planning stage is AFTER shopping, so don’t judge the plan until the planning stage of the plan.”
“You said plan a lot.”
“Less talk more thrift shop, let’s go.” His hand grabbed and away they went. It didn’t matter how rich he was, Robin loved thrift shopping, and after meeting her and knocking down her walls of distrust and uncertainty until they became practically joined at the hip platonic soulmates, finding out how many little treasures you could actually find in those shops, he kind of loved it too. It was an experience he wouldn’t have ever gotten without her, an experience that only added to the down to earth personality that’d developed as he grew older with her.
He didn’t know who he’d be without Robin… probably the same douchebag everyone kind of expected him to be. The douchebag he’d been in his teen years perhaps, partying, drinking, doing drugs, trying to be something he wasn’t to impress the people around him when all they cared about was the vestiges of fame trickling from his being.
Perhaps she’d saved his life by just being there. So he’d indulge a little tomfoolery for her sake.
Even if it did wind up with his feet hurting and his arms aching carrying bags of things he’d never ever wear but might have to for true love, trudging down some random street while Robin looked for some weird non-chain coffee shop because Starbucks held no soul.
“Robin can we just— look, right there, Starbucks, we can go in Starbucks, it’ll be fine, in and out!”
“I’m not going in Starfucks, there’s always some idiot instagraming the weird spelling of their name on the cup as if it’s not a Starbucks ploy to get them free advertising.”
“Or someone claiming to be Voldemort as if the barista would actually shout “he who must not be named” for the brief moment of twitter fame reporting it would bring them.”
“Or tacky mass-produced merch.”
“Or overpriced desserts that aren’t worth it.”
“Or—Ooh!! Lookie, there’s one!” They probably could have gone on for longer, but Robin spotted the little brown shop with large dark windows at the end of the street with a hanging sign outside similar to one found on old bars only this one had two coffee beans on it with the word The Roast written in cursive around the beans. And up close it looked like every rustic coffee shop ever made.
Simple, lots of browns and warm white lighting.
“Down the road from a Starbucks? That’s a gutsy business move.” Steve hummed with the most basic amount of interest as he entered through the door Robin held open for him.
“Honestly you’re never more than a stones throw away from a Starbucks, pick any direction I bet we’ll find another within two blocks.”
“That’s fair.” They made it all the way to the counter where a lone, bored employee leaned heavily against the thick wooden countertop, flicking through a magazine of some kind, the board above him strewn with funnily named coffee drinks and little doodles to match them, Steve found his eyes drawn to that while the Barista released a deep
“Welcome to The Roast, what can I get for you?” Without looking up from his magazine.
“Alright, I’ll have a uhm—ow—Robin, what—ow would you stop elbowing me?”
“Steve.”
“What?” He followed her pointer finger to the man now looking at him with the widest, brownest, most beautiful Bambi eyes he’d ever seen in his goddamn life and all thoughts just kind of drifted away, replaced with the single word… pretty. “Oh…Hello...”
Part 7
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soulmuppet · 5 months
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📣Inevitable is live on Backer-Kit!
Inevitable is an Arthurian Western ttrpg in which your party of disastrously sad cowboy knights fail to stop the apocalypse...
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Knights and wizards have defended the Kingdom of Myth for centuries. These lands have known peace and prosperity, but soon they shall lie barren.
The Prophets have declared that your city shall burn and Myth will fall. All those who follow your King shall die. It is INEVITABLE.
But you shall defy fate. Myth will not end while you bear arms.
You will fail, but as long as there are still stories, they will sing of you!
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Inevitable is a new roleplaying game system from SoulMuppet Publishing, the creators and publishers behind Orbital Blues, Best Left Buried, Stygian Library and dozens of other RPG systems and adventures.
The book is a focused system for a play-to-lose Arthurian Western campaign. But what does this mean?
Arthurian: Sad knights. A king who is doing his best (but badly). Foolish virtue quests doomed to fail. Women in lakes.
Western: Sweeping deserts. Dusty heroes wearing big boots, bigger hats. Can of beans cooked on a campfire. Six shooters.
Play-To-Lose: Your kingdom is going to be destroyed. It is Inevitable. Play to find out how, but there's no way to win.
Focused System: Your characters serve the King of Myth, and you are trying to prevent the destruction of his kingdom and your civilisation. The system is linked intrinsically to telling this story in this system, and finely tuned to create the perfect Arthurian Western campaign
Campaign: While Inevitable provides options for one-shots and short campaigns (including the one in our Quickstart), the material in the book supports a full length campaign with minimal prep. A traditional Inevitable campaign runs for 3-6 months, choosing 3 of the available 6 Dooms. However, should you choose to use all the material and embark on this quixotic, almost impossible quest to save the world you could well be playing for years.
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thisisnotthenerd · 5 months
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and the other half of round two, the sidequests!
feel free to give reasoning/propaganda as you like!
the intrepid heroes poll
quick episode descriptions:
volcano of violence: all of the lotr parallels in one place. leiland being a cringefail after casting circle of death. markus negotiating with an eagle. the combination of grasping web and reverse gravity. balloon elf. sokhbarr raising the lava mog. the concept of galfast hamhead. efink facing her father and husband and beign conflicted
the great chase: caravan chase, mad max style on the teenager's bed. ti wants to blow up the boy. car-go and bean are remarkably effective. boomer is a boarding party. jizz balloons. lots of toy vehicles. car-go transforms with felix inside.
the horizon beyond the squall: marcid attacking a chimney. you wrote a whole song just to be mean to me. cheese, prince bitch. no kings for this captain. nat 20 medicine check to revive myrtle. destroy undead. beating a motherfucker with another motherfucker. bob's inflict wounds. ending with cheese getting a ship and the buccaneer buddies sailing off.
unfinished business: splitting up to resolve the mystery. buckster's legendary nat 20 persuasion to give advantage on stealth. daisy and the vicar sneaking in. sylvester failing at climbing the tower. lars killing the constable and pretending to be a ghost for lucretia. gangie and the vicar undulating. daisy and sylvester simultaneously arriving. shitting out of a window to "provide a cushion". daisy getting her story with sylvester's help. gangie falling into mrs. molesly's room. sylvester almost dying but getting a nat 20 death save with buckster's help. a wedding and bacchanal.
we're the heroes: one of these things is not like the others. collecting the bag of socks. jammer crying about weights. sam and philtrum. dates at the questing beast. the tournament. dream's cinderella moment. where did those mice get lithium. you don't get wet fire. i disavow you. what do you want me to tell your family. he had enough. blast him to the underworld. you can gps a phone. my girl just glinda'd your ass! that's some american magic, bitch! evan and dream lock up tallulah's wand in an orb.
i fucking love you: no one is surprised. incendiary cloud. OSTENTATIA'S DIVINE INTERVENTION ON A 19. god wants a bag from ostentatia. antiope will not submit. penny texts i'm in. nta 20 counterspell on finger of death. nonna wallace approves. katja trips a snake. i didn't even know you could trip a snake. antiope's incredible action surge turn that ends with showing her ass. sam is power word killed. that's my sister. danielle channels anima. revivify. bringing talura through the doorway in death. ending with graduation and 'take us to the book!'.
waylaid by werewolves: the werewolves are girls. zarb mini with six buttholes. chewing gum mist. fifi. shooting through the flamethrower. losing dracula. drago was the star. fifi becomes a werewolf. reading a letter in the middle of battle. florina under the carriage. enraged frenzy. i've heard of a cat scan. i make the horse fly. something seems very familiar about her. the dog is my wife! izzy holds with disappointment. a monster has been eating my letters to you.
duel on the southern lawn: rumor phase. rue writes the letter and commands wuvvy to burn it. i drank tea and went to bed. letter to wrackingspelt. rue's assistant. hob getting clocked by rue. wuvvy demanding satisfaction. andhera demanding satisfaction. wet wrestling. this is the biggest stretch of a fuckin' lifetime. nat 20 to be a slippy boy. hoisting andhera up by his taut cotton pants. accepting the hand of friendship.
yonder where the fruit do be lyin': quichei. deli's perception roll. raphaniel as a youth pastor. giant radish head. colin is covered in blue. extremely realistic fake orange. rick perry, you dog. silence. queen's losing it. raphaniel gets the orange down. banana boat guy. come on provolone! deli attacks queen pamela rocks. subtle spell shatter in the carriage. brennan kills pamela rocks again. you died for nothing. chasing and murdering the mushroom guy.
in the heart of death: brennan walks jujubee through an optimized turn. 49 damage immediately. troyánn slips. keekee starts falling. scorching ray. the devil works hard, but d20 works harder. buddy bear shoves zaria into the pit. lightning javelin in the titty. fireball. princess does like 70 damage and pushed kerwyn into the abyss. troyánn goes down. princess gets keena. nat 20 counterspell. twyla crits on morgan to end the battle.
case closed: the party converges on oblongata station once more. they're facing down the don and madam loathing, who can turn them against each other. imelda and dan flash the gangsters to wildly differing results. ivana rolls a 59 on hunch and he still comes back. elias punches his boss. dan goes down. the fix eats the key. conrad rolls a 57 [the number of heinz varieties] to bring down madam loathing. elias steals a birthday cake and runs out into the street, gets a date and reconciles his childhood trauma as he goes into witness protection.
evolution & revolution: warning the populace. pitching scam calls. driving the truck. phoebe is jaegering dr. wenabocker in a very gross maxi. the ground collapses. revenants are charmed. viola is very efficient. thorn calls lightning. tula attacks her son for 67 damage. ava attacks the groun for 109 damage and a long rest. jaysohn gets phoebe. lila fireballs. viola crits twice and kills one guy with paladin/fighter shenanigans and then kills the rest by kicking the trigger of a gun and hitting a gas tank. tula heals jaysohn, lukas, and herself a little bit. battle is over in 1.33 rounds.
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