Dating can be challenging, yet Peter Parker has a variety of love interests thirsting after him at any given time. He shares his wooing wisdom by presenting the Spidey System.
Step 1: Spark Interest
Aggressively and awkwardly wear down your target.
Step 2: Peak Curiosity
Compell your target to seek you out.
Step 3: Investigate Physique
Wear something that leaves little to the imagination.
Step 4: Ditch Completely
The most essential step!
Leave your date with zero warning. It will leave them wanting more.
Step 5: Excuse Absence
Provide a bogus reason for wasting their time and expectations.
Step 6: Youthful Indiscretion
The immaturity will make you appear aloof. Allowing you to replicate the Spidey system again and again with the same targets.
98% of spots iterations are absolutely JACKED, probably because he made his debut in the 80s (1984 to be specific, the good year of Footloose!) and they kinda only knew how to draw one body type, lol. maybe, despite being a scientist, he used his free time to work out?
he also dies
again
...and again
...and again!
conclusion: get some body fat or you will not be able to survive the harsh marvel comics winter.
bonus: heres him making deadpool kick himself in the crotch. lmao.