#that video of the women say fuck everyone else i respect you but its me at kagome

[g-on-ef]

Rant part 3

Army twitter really thinks that just because they have been around since 2013~2018 have college degrees that they are somehow above everyone else and are immune to propaganda.

Are there armys on that app that I genuinely love and respect ??? Yes.

Are there armys on that app that have shown they are a bunch of hypocritical sheep that think they're better than everyone else just cause they went to school and been with BTS longer than others ??? Abso fucking lutly

Since this whole t**nnie rumor I'm noticing how easily fooled these people are and how quick common sense is to leave them so long as it fits their narrative.

Bitches on that app will preach about trust the members don't trust the media and respect their privacy and these past days have proven point on how hypocritical these fuckers are.

Like yall mean to tell me that Taehyung, the person who values privacy above all else, Taehyung the one who thanked armys for not bothering him in Hawaii,

Taehyung who has mentioned time and time again that he doesn't want to lose his morals and principles who's always been open and honest about things would just casually stroll the street of Paris and allow himself to get caught with his partner ???

The same man who's managed to keep his family away from the spotlight will suddenly allow the paparazzi to catch him casually strolling with his partner ??? !!!

Its just so funny how no one was able to capture a huge celebrity like Tae on camera when he landed in France and yet some random paparazzi was able to. A paparazzi who mind you tagged the wrong accounts ???

Like you mean to tell me a "professional" journalist tagged not one but two wrong accounts ??? !!! And the fact that everyone is saying they got permission from their security to take pics but from afar ... like why ??? Why is it okay to take pics so long as it's from afar but in the past they've been attacked and taken their phones when they tried to take pics ??? Also how convenient that they got a "clear" photo of Tae but not a single one of Jennie and all we got is a video from an odd angle where her face isn't even shown.

Again let's go ahead and say they are dating why would either Tae or J*nnie need to be vague about it ??? Again Tae is a very vocal person and is not afraid to speak his mind.

Need I remind everyone how he was quick to shut those rumors down about the girl who he was supposedly dating ??? And before yall get on me on oh well he hasnt shut these down, let me also add the reason why he shut it down is cause the media got a hold of it.

Also isn't it odd that Dispatch and other news/gossip outlets haven't spread this shit ??? You would think that wit these two "dating" there would be news everywhere and yet it's always funny how whenever these two are "spotted" it's always outside of Korea.

Hell even when they were spotted Big Hit issued a statement that they were gonna sue the guy who was making edits of the situation cause it was fake.

So they can hide in Korea {which remind you is very small} but can't hide anywhere else ???

Also I'm bringing this up Tae is a very private person why would he or hell even J*nnie at that matter subject their partners to the hate their Fandom will give them ??? Blonks have attacked ridicule and done irreparable harm to Tae and armys are always retaliating why would they put their partners through that when said Fandumbs can't act normal ???

Like do armys not listen to a word these men say ??? They always preach about wanting privacy so why would they subject their partner to a Fandom where yall can't act normal whenever they fit your little hetero narrative ???

No seriously I can show yall screenshots of them being hypocrites when it comes to them being around women but if you bring up them being with the same sex it's all don't label them we don't know their sexuality you don't know if he likes men.

Just say you're homophobic and leave. It's better than yall having to harassing queer people whenever they make their art queer related.

Another thing I find it funny how these fuckers

Are so quick to attack taekook shippers and call them delusional and say the ship isn't real but are quick to believe this.

Like you mean to tell me it's impossible for them to be single, it's possible for tae to be dating J*nnie but it's delusional and a lie for Tae and JK to be dating each other even though there's a ton of proof that'll state other wise.

It's also funny how again yall preach about privacy but won't shut up about it cause for some reason yall need to constantly talk about it

A blurry video surface oh its him let's spread it talk about and have his name drag through the mud 😀 never mind we should just ignore it and not give it any more attention than it needs to cause at the end of the day it's his name that'll get dragged.

I can go on and on about how dumb these fuckers are and how they are making a situation into a bigger mess than it already is but every time I go to that app I'm reminded that 99.9% of the times there's no reason to do so cause yall already made up your minds especially when it fits yall heteronorm narrative.

And please don't get me started on the cosplayer bullshit -_-

Anyways this was a rant that went longer than it needed to so have a good day/evening/afternoon my Tumblr friends.

#im ranting #rant #anti taennie #im allergic to bullshit #anti twitter armys #ignore me

[jadedownthedrain]

To be honest, I like you just the way you are.

#i love u kagome #kagome higurashi #kagome x inuyasha #inuyashaedit #inuyasha #inukag #inuyasha x kagome #inuyasha edit #that video of the women say fuck everyone else i respect you but its me at kagome #also conversely kagome at inuyasha lol #inuyasha higurashi #kikyo inuyasha #sesshomaru #izayoi inuyasha

[susiephone]

Imagine thinking that wanting straight people to be accepting of gay people is a "trap" and not like, literally THE entire goal of the modern LGBT rights movement since its inception

okay. this is in response to me saying “respectability politics is a trap.” which it absolutely is.

but i’ll give you the benefit of the doubt here. let’s define respectability politics, shall we?

several people who are more well-spoken than me have talked about this. to quote this article on the subject:

Respectability politics is a school of thought that utilizes respectability narratives as the basis for enacting social, political, and legal change.

Respectability narratives are representations of marginalized individuals meant to construct an image of the marginalized group as people sharing similar traits, values, morals with the dominant group.

essentially, respectability politics is when people in a marginalized group (queer people, disabled people, people of color) wish to be accepted by the majority, and thus present themselves in a way and behave in a way that the majority deems acceptable - and pressure others in their marginalized group to do the same. for example:

“Not all bisexual people are sluts, I’m bi and I’ve been in a committed relationship for 20 years!”

“I’m gay, but I’m not one of THOSE gay guys, I hate shopping and I don’t like to flaunt my sexuality at all!”

“Lesbians aren’t really all masculine, I love makeup and having long hair.”

(I’m using examples I’ve seen in the queer community because I’m queer; I know this happens a lot in communities of color, but I am not qualified to speak on that at all.)

this stems from a desire to be accepted by the majority; for the purposes of this discussion, straight people. we hear straight people say things like “i could never date a bi person, they’re all cheaters” or “i don’t mind gay guys, don’t just shove it in my face” and “why don’t lesbians act like women if they love them?” and, in response, some people go, “i don’t act like that!! you can accept me! i fit in! i’m respectable, i’m not like those guys, they embarrass us!”

there’s also a lot of people saying, “don’t reinforce the stereotype.” as if it’s OUR fault straight people stereotype us.

so this leads to shaming within our own community:

“You’re bi and polyamorous? Wow, way to make people think we’re all two-timing whores.”

“Makeup? Jesus, we get it, you’re gay, you don’t have to make it a pride parade every time you go out.”

“You look like a teenage boy, this is why everyone lesbians aren’t real women.”

and that all boils down to:

“THIS is the example you’re setting? This is the face you show to the world? Don’t you know you’re representing us? No wonder they don’t respect us.”

and that’s the real problem: telling other queer people, “it is YOUR fault you’re not accepted, YOU aren’t acceptable, YOU reinforce these stereotypes, YOU should try and be more respectable, more normal.” and the thing is, “normal” is defined by the majority. THEY decide what is acceptable behavior for us. and guess what? 

most of the time, that boils down to, “It’s fine if you’re different... as long as you’re as close to what I deem normal as possible. As long as I can’t tell you’re different.”

in the queer community, this sort of thinking has led to the exclusion of butch lesbians, femme gay men, nonbinary people, non-passing trans people, trans people in general, people who use any pronouns besides she/her and he/him, bisexual people, ace people, aro people, pan people, polyamorous bisexual people, people who have an active sex life, sex workers, people who have changed how they identify, and countless others. these people get shoved aside by the Good Respectable Gays, who are eager to say, “We’re not like them, we’re just like you!” in order to be accepted by the mainstream. and it still doesn’t work. even the most macho, would-never-guess-it gay guy is bound to face some level of oppression or otherness at some point in his life. it doesn’t matter how much he fits in, how much he distances himself from the Unacceptable Queers; it won’t work 100% of the time. how’s that for a punchline?

there is no point in trying to file off the “unacceptable” parts of our community just to please straight people. 

if a person hates all queer people, no matter how they act or present, they’re a homophobe.

if a person doesn’t hate queer people, just the ones who shove it in your face and sleep around and won’t shut up about it and buck gender norms and use weird pronouns and expect people to learn their new name and change their identity every week... they’re still a fucking homophobe.

and why the fuck are we trying to please homophobes, again?

so when people say lil nas x is bad, actually, because he “reinforces the stereotype” of gay people going to hell and thinking a lot about sex or whatever, they’re playing right into respectability politics. why can’t he just talk about his sexuality in a normal way? why can’t he express himself in a nicer way? why does he have to use that imagery? why does he have to make straight people uncomfortable?

lis nas x is a gay black man who grew up being told he’d burn in hell for being gay. and he made an awesome song with a legendary music video saying, “fine. i’ll go to hell, just like you want, and it’ll be great. i’ll take the damn place over and make satan fall in love with me. and i’ll have a great time doing it, because i’m proud of who i am, and i won’t apologize for it or be ashamed of it anymore.”

to see that and wring your hands, worrying that a straight person will see it and decide to be homophobic about it, and pinning the blame for that on nas is missing the point.

every time we as a community make ourselves lesser or change the way we present just to be accepted by the majority, they move the goalposts, and someone else gets left behind. and the beautiful thing about the queer community is that there is a place for everyone who is left out in the cold by the straight, cis majority.

“We’re here, we’re queer, get used to it” was the rallying cry for a reason. we’re different, you think we’re weird, you think we’re deviant, you don’t get us, and that’s fine, you don’t have to get us. we’re not going anywhere. get used to it.

respectability politics is a game you cannot win. so stop playing.

#respectability politics #queer #queer pride #lgbtq #long post cw #Anonymous

[waynedunlaptheorgandonor]

watched s11ep1

i will provide you with a quick review before i disappear back into the ether of twd avoidance

lots of spoilers under the cut. also i wrote way too much and i worked all night and haven’t slept so i didn’t bother to reread literally any of it, so it might be completely nonsensical, tho if you don’t expect that from me by this point idk whose blog you’ve been reading

enjoy:

hokay, first off, i’ll start by saying that i enjoyed it more than i expected to. i’ve been avoiding any sort of discussion about stuff, but my google algorithm is so fucked at this point that i still get recommended articles and stuff every now and then, so i was already pretty aware of what i was walking into, and was expecting it to be eh, but actually i prob enjoyed it more than i enjoyed the finale

(don’t get too excited tho, the finale was rly boring lmfao)

anyway

episode starts off with a tense scouting mission

it takes .005 seconds into the episode for caryl to exchange a look of longing, establishing that they are still having weird conflict and are both too fucking stubborn to do anything about it even tho they hate it desperately

i imagine that will continue for a while

rosita, kelly, carol, maggie, what’s her face with the bad hair, and lydia (i think that’s everyone?) lower down to some army bunker or something, where a bunch of walkers are taking a snooze, and the girls are very respectful of walker naptime, and do their best not to wake them up

obviously they eventually wake up, but i’ll get to that in a sec

as they’re tiptoeing through the walker tulips, there’s this split second where carol spots a machine gun, and looks at maggie with a face like, “can i plzzzz, i am mad horny for that machine gun,” but maggie tells her no. (i 110% expected her to defy orders and accidentally wake up all the walkers, but she actually behaved herself for once. well. mostly)

never fear, tho, after the girl gang collects a bunch of MREs they go back to wait for the dudes waiting up top to pull them up, and bc men ruin everything, one of the ropes break, and daryl catches it before it falls, but then a slow motion drop of blood falls on a walker’s face, and just like that, walker naptime is over, and carol uses her bow and arrow for two seconds before she is like “fuck this” and whips out the machine gun

yes, she is super hot using it

yes, daryl watches her do it

anyway, all the other girls get rescued, and carol is about to be pulled up, but bc she is a #girlboss, she first makes a beeline for one more crate full of MREs. daryl covers her while she gets the loot, and when she gets back up top they have another charged moment as carol hands him back his knife

just fuck already, jfc

titles!

cut to alexandria where everything is still not smilestimes

BUT, we do get to see uncle daryl run and hug rj and judith (and dog), and FUCKING HERSHEL JR, LIGHT OF MY LIFE is also there

istg, they could not have casted a better child, i a d o r e him

oh, and some friends of maggie’s show up too, idk

cut to a staff meeting where everyone is like, whomp whomp, we’re all gonna starve to death unless we figure out something quick

cue maggie going, “oh, i know where food is, but it requires me to tell you my tragic backstory, in case anyone didn’t watch my bottle episode”

she tells her dramatic backstory about all her friends getting slaughtered by the reapers for no apparent reason, and then she’s like “anyway, let’s go back there!”

no one thinks it’s a great idea, but a group of people decide to go anyway, including daryl and gabriel. rosita is super pissed that gabriel is going, and carol doesn’t go, probably partly bc it’s a shitty fucking idea, and also bc they have to keep caryl apart bc otherwise they’ll fix their problems ahead of schedule and they won’t be able to drag out the needless angst

daryl looks kind of annoyed that carol doesn’t volunteer to go 

bitch, i thought you wanted her to stop putting herself in the line of fire! make up your damn mind!

moving on

cut to a thunderstorm, where, if you look closely, you’ll notice daryl is wearing the STUPIDEST hat i’ve ever seen. just get an umbrella, jfc

for some reason negan is with them, bc ig he knows his way around washington dc, and no one in six years has bothered to figure out how to get around the city and/or get a map, and he is like “hey guys, maybe we shouldn’t try to walk in this fucking hurricane,” and everyone is like “FUCK YOU NEGAN, YOU’RE NOT THE BOSS OF US!!!” 

this will be a common occurrence 

but eventually daryl is even like “actually, it’s rly unpleasant out here, and my hat is mad stupid, can we go inside plz?”

so they go inside an old metro station, which is actually a rly cool cinematic choice. i rly like the idea, and they executed it rly well

speaking of executions

there are some fucking RULL CREEPY walkers. idk why they bothered me so badly, but they were what they at first assumed were corpses wrapped up in tarps, but turns out none of them had been properly put down, so they go through killing these rotted bodies that had supposedly been there since The Fall, and it’s very gross and cool

this entire time, btw, negan is like “hey, i know i’m a shitty person, but i have some rational arguments about why we shouldn’t be doing this right now,” and everyone is like, “FUCK YOU NEGAN, YOU’RE NOT THE BOSS OF US!!!” and he’s just like “god fucking damnit”

(i forgot to mention that at one point, when they’re headed into the metro station, negan is trying to warn ppl of the potential danger, and everyone is ignoring him, and he tries to talk to daryl, and daryl is like “fuck you, you think we’re BUDDIES?” and negan is like “oh, ok, so you’re gonna be like that too? fanfreakingtastic” and it’s very funny)

anyway. a fat monster zombie escapes its tarp at one point, and tries to eat some npc, and negan saves him, again is like “hey, anyone else realize that this is a FUCKING BAD PLAN?”, and everyone is like “we don’t care, you’re still shitty and we’re not listening to you, and you don’t actually care about random npc i would literally not be able to pick out in a lineup bc his face is so generic, you’re not the boss of us!!!”

it’s at this point that negan finally is like, “why am i even here? bc i know how to get around washington dc? do none of you have a map?” and i was like, “right?! that’s what i said!” 

it’s then revealed that maggie only brought negan along to murder him under the guise of “oops, he got hurt in the line of duty, it wasn’t my fault,” and daryl has this look on his face that says, “i seriously need to stop hanging out with lethal women bent on revenge bc it’s gonna give me high blood pressure,” and maggie has a badass moment where she points a gun she has for some reason at negan and is like “i have like, one shred of human compassion left inside of me, and if you keep pushing me i will fucking kill you without a second thought, so shut the hell up”

(in her defense, negan had just dropped glenn’s name to purposely antagonize her, which was rude as hell)

(for the record, i’m completely on maggie’s side here, but negan still is right that trapping themselves in a metro station is a bad call)

anyway, moving away from that briefly

i think this jump cut happens sooner, i don’t actually remember, but whatever who cares, point is, we get to the part of the show that actually matters, and that’s anything involving my love, juanita “princess” sanchez

and also eugene, yumiko, and ezekiel

they are being asked increasingly invasive questions by commonwealth ppl, some of which i wish they actually would of answered (what do they use to wipe their asses with?? surely toilet paper has long since become extinct)

zeke, who is so much more tolerable as a character now that he’s not larping as a king, has this incredibly weird and sort of sexually charged moment with a dude in an orange stormtrooper costume, where he’s like, “i bet you were an asshole cop back before The Fall, you stupid fascist, #fuckthepolice, mb literally? idk, this moment has a lot of pent up aggression that could easily translate to hate sex, it might just be the intense eye contact, but w/e, let’s just move along,” and then he has a coughing fit to remind the audience that he’s currently dying of cancer, and orange stormtrooper is like “lolz, loser, drink some water you dumb piece of shit”

cut to the wholesome foursome sitting at a picnic table in a guarded courtyard eating gruel, and yumkio, who finally has a personality, and princess are like “hey, this place fucking sucks, can we leave?” and zeke is like, “yeah, i met this orange stormtrooper who i think might be dtf and/or murder, so we should probably bounce”

but eugene is like, “but i want some hot stephanie ass, and also some bullshit excuse about how mb commonewealth will save alexandria” which, they left before things went super downhill, right? idr. it was after hilltop fell, but they don’t know alexandria got fucked either, if i recall? w/e, not important

two seconds after he says this, they talk to some people who are like “we’ve been here for four months, or maybe it’s been nine, i don’t actually remember, i’ve stopped processing the passage of time,” and the wholesome foursome takes this as a bad sign, tho that’s just the life i’ve lived as a night worker during a pandemic, so i was like #mood

but then they watch some guy get dragged away screaming to get “reprocessed” and eugene is like “ok, nvm, let’s bounce”

(my theory on what “reprocessing” is, is that they’re stuck in a room and have to watch hours and hours of customer service training videos on vhs from the 90s)

i definitely got my jump cut scenes mixed up bc i think the negan accusing maggie of a murder plot thing happened in between this scene and then the next commonwealth scene, but w/e, i’ll just finish what happens in the commonwealth arch

the wholesome foursome are trying to hatch a plan to escape, except princess, my love, is distracted watching some stormtroopers flirt, and the other three are like “wtf, dude, how can you even tell any of them apart?” and princess then tells them every stormtroopers backstory bc she is brilliant and pays rly close attention to shit, and the other three are like, “this is useful information, thank you for being an insane person”

their plan involves yumiko and eugene dressing up as stormtroopers and leading princess and zeke out of the place, which works fine actually, except on their way out they come across the Depressing Wall of Probably Mostly Dead Missing Loved Ones

they’re about to leave, when princess is like, “wait, yumiko, you’re on here, that’s weird huh?”

sure enough, yumiko  is on the wall, with a note from ig her sister 

the scene ends with yumiko going, “guys...i can’t leave...i have tragic backstory to unveil”

tragic backstory to be continued ig

back in murder metro town, npc and some other npc have stolen all the supplies, there’s a train blocking the track, and a horde of walkers are coming towards them, so things are not going fantastic

they horde is too big to take down, so they start to climb on top of the train car to get away

but dog runs away!

and daryl, being every pet owner ever, is like “gotta go get my dog, guys, try not to get killed while i’m gone, c u soon!” and he ducks under the train and disappears

#priorities

the episode ends with maggie climbing up the train car but getting grabbed by a walker and dangling off the edge, and negan is there and they have a lion king moment where maggie is like, “scar! help me!” and negan is like “long live the king, bitch” and walks away into the shadows, leaving maggie to a potential death

which, while i know isn’t actually going to happen, would be a really fucking funny move on the writers’ part

like, “look, lauren’s back! and now she’s dead, bet you didn’t expect that!”

anyway

my assumption is negan will actually end up helping her up or something, continuing his ambiguous morality bullshit that actually isn’t ambiguous bc he BEAT GLENN TO DEATH WITH A FUCKING BAT WRAPPED IN BARBED WIRE IN FRONT OF HIS PREGNANT WIFE

the maggie/negan arch is kind of dumb, but whatevs, i’ll tolerate it, as long as my boy glenn gets justice in the end

anyway, cue credits!

final assessment: good episode. i’m much more interested in commonwealth than the reapers, tho i am hoping that daryl’s personality-less ex turns out to be a monster killing machine with no conscience, that’ll be fun. princess is a gift from god. hershel jr needs his own tv show. needs more carol (and caryl)

the end! going back into my walking dead free chamber! see you next episode!

-diz

#i didn't mean to recap the entire fucking episode lol #sorry #it's to make up for my lack of content lately #or something #anyway #caryl #twd s11ep1 #twd s11 spoilers #dunlap tp

[morporkian-cryptid]

Lupin III - The Castle of Cagliostro, and its extremely gay and romantic title scene

Hello everyone, this is your new installment of “Elliott rambles about her fandoms”!

Today I am going to be talking (well, mostly yelling) about the opening credits of Lupin III - The Castle of Cagliostro.

Because I’ve rewatched that movie almost two weeks ago, and I’m still going into a fit of hysterics every time I so much as think about it.

[Image description: Lupin and Jigen sitting in front of the Fiat, with a small nomad cooking space set up. It is night, Lupin is reading a map and Jigen is holding a pan above a small gas stove. The lighting is dim and comes only for the stove. The subtitles of the song lyrics read “My love for you burns”]

https://twitter.com/spacequeenemily/status/1118274079662977025?lang=en

This Twitter link is the only video of the title scene I could find online; the image quality is a bit low but at least it’s the full scene. Please watch it, I promise you won’t regret it.

Fair warning: long post with much capslock, very swearing.

Okay, so.

The lyrics of this song, Fire Treasure, go more or less like this (from the subtitles of the movie, which I assume are the official translation) :

I want to go with you, searching for happiness / No matter how hard the road or how the night may grow cold / I just want to wander on with you

Who else is there to comfort and hold / This lonely traveler when their heart grows cold? / Who else but you can make all my dreams come true?

Like a raging fire my love for you burns / All I want is for you to know how I feel / Make me your prisoner and never let go

(additional lyrics which are on the wiki but not in the title sequence)

You, who wander the wasteland  / I want to let you sleep / The shooting star is for you

I want only you to understand / This love of mine that blazes with flames / I'll clear away the enigmatic mist

You can find the official japanese lyrics here on the Lupin III fandom wiki.

Now this is a pretty basic love song, and we know most of the theme songs in this series are love songs and it doesn’t always mean anything (looking at you, Red Jacket opening theme). The music itself (without the lyrics) is used several times during the movie, especially in scenes with Lupin and Clarisse; and reused later in several movies involving similar dynamics.

But the only time the whole song, with lyrics, plays in The Castle of Cagliostro, it’s during the opening credits / title sequence. Aka, Lupin and Jigen’s road trip.

Yeah. This longing, yearning love song about a lonely traveler and the person who silently loves them and wants to follow them through all the troubles of the road and look for happiness by their side... Is played along with of a video of Jigen and Lupin traveling together.

And oh, if only it was just that...

It could have been two guys being bros, two friends having a fun road trip together. They could have shown the banter and playful fights between them that we see in the rest of the movie. But NO. THIS is what they gave us instead:

[The silhouettes of Jigen and Lupin sitting on and leaning against the Fiat, with a boat in the background and an orange sunset-like sky]

[the Fiat driving on a narrow bridge in the middle of an expanse of water glistening and reflecting the pink and purple sky]

[Lupin lying on his back in the grass, and Jigen sitting near him and cooking in front of a small portable gas stove, the Fiat parked next to them. It is night, and the gaz stove gives a soft glow, the only source of light in the picture.]

[Lupin sitting on the roof of the Fiat and Jigen standing left of it. They are waiting for a train with wooden wagons to pass. There are white flowers in the foreground on the right of the screen.]

[Night time, on a backdrop of dark blue sky with white stars. Lupin is sitting on the roof of the Fiat, lighting a cigarette (the Fiat itself isn’t in the frame). Jigen is standing near him, smoking a cigarette, with only his head visible. The subtitles of the song lyrics write “Make me your prisoner and never let go”.]

[The same scene from a different angle, the Fiat is now visible, with grass in the foreground, Lupin is seen from the back and Jigen from head to feet. The dark blue sky is fading into white at the bottom, suggesting sunrise.]

They could have given us a fun, “straight pals being bros” road trip. Instead, they decided to give us a soft, nostalgic ambiance, with orange and pink sunsets, the boys wistfully looking into the distance under a starry night sky, smoking cigarettes together in silence, with the soft glow of a shared meal around a campfire. THEY MADE THE CHOICE TO MAKE THIS AS FUCKING ROMANTIC AS POSSIBLE. THEY WILLINGLY MADE THAT DECISION.

We all know that this franchise’s subtext is not exactly subtle in establishing, to name just one obvious example, Jigen’s orientation (hum hum kabuki-related slang, hum hum bootleg playboy magazine, hum hum shameless flirting with burly soldiers).

But THIS. This isn’t a “I hate women” joke. This isn’t a two-second frame showing a bootleg gay pinup magazine. This isn’t a subtle parallel between Lupin’s relationships with Fujiko and with Jigen. This is the most OBVIOUS and EXPLICIT bit of subtext I have ever seen in this goddamn subtext-packed series. This is A FUCKING LOVE SONG, WITH THE WORDS “MY LOVE FOR YOU BURNS” EXPLICITLY IN IT, PLAYED ON A VIDEO OF JIGEN AND LUPIN ON A ROAD TRIP WITH THE MOST ROMANTIC AND SOFT VISUALS POSSIBLE. ONE MINUTE AND FIFTY FIVE SECONDS OF TYPICAL ROMANTIC SCENE WITH TYPICAL ROMANTIC VISUALS AND A FUCKING LOVE SONG.

This can’t be an accident. You can’t accidentally make a scene like this. I mean come on, “Like a raging fire my love for you burns, I just want you to know how I feel” with a panning shot of a starry night sky and Lupin and Jigen silently sharing a smoke? HOW DO THEY THINK WE ARE GOING TO INTERPRET THIS? IS THERE ANY OTHER POSSIBLE FUCKING INTERPRETATION THAN “JIGEN IS MADLY IN LOVE WITH LUPIN?“ NO THERE ISN’T. THERE FUCKING ISN’T.

They go and try to tell us that Lupin and Jigen are just friends, they give Jigen barely believable female love interests whom he has little to no chemistry with, they write Jigen getting angry when he thinks Lupin might be gay, and then they turn around and make THIS. FUCKING. TITLE SEQUENCE.

It kills me because IT’S CANON but also it’s not! They’re not stating that Jigen loves Lupin, they’re not confirming that they’re a couple, at no point in the 50 years of existence of this damn franchise has either of them explicitly declared that they were in love with the other, and that is most likely never going to happen. But this fucking scene exists. This fucking scene is CANON, and it’s technically still subtext, but it is the most OBVIOUS and IN YOUR GODDAMN FACE subtext EVER.

Disclaimer: I agree that most of the anime and movies’ (still relatively un-subtle) subtext can be disregarded or interpreted as platonic if you want, and I absolutely respect anyone’s desire to interpret them as platonic friends. All visions and interpretations can coexist. That being said, I’m sorry but for this specific scene I will not, ever, budge from the position that it is a fucking romantic love scene and that there is no other possible interpretation, I’m sorry but just FUCKING LOOK AT IT. LOOK AT IT AND TELL ME THIS ISN’T MEANT TO BE ROMANTIC. I DARE YOU.

This scene is just at the VERY LIMIT of explicitly stating Jigen and Lupin’s love. But it’s STILL NOT EXPLICIT. The song says “I love you” but neither Jigen nor Lupin does. The song on its own could relate to any number of characters (and in the rest of the movie it relates mostly to Clarisse, and more generally to all the girls Lupin leaves behind). The video without the music, while being very sweet and having a romantic vibe, could still be interpreted as a road trip between friends. And yet. AND YET. They made the conscious decision to put THAT SONG with THESE IMAGES. And to then “leave it to our interpretation”.

The Castle of Cagliostro was the second movie of the Lupin III franchise. It came out in 1979, not even ten years after the first episode of the anime aired. This is one of the establishing movies of the franchise, the one that propelled Lupin III on the international scene, the door through which generations of fans have been introduced to the series. A now iconic and unmissable pillar of the pop culture myth that Lupin III has become, a jewel of hand-drawn animation, produced by one of Japan’s most internationally well known animated movie director, future founder of one of its most iconic studios.

This isn’t a “blink and you’ll miss it” nudge in an largely forgettable TV special with weird chara designs and a plot created by writers seemingly on crack. This isn’t a subtle nod to long time fans and shippers like Part 5 did in 2018. This is the FUCKING TITLE SEQUENCE of the CASTLE OF MOTHERFUCKING CAGLIOSTRO by HAYAO GODDAMN MIYAZAKI. AND IT’S A LOVE STORY.

It’s been a week and a half, guys. And I still want to scream. I will never be free. Lupin and Jigen are in love and the world needs to know.

#in conclusion: they are in love your honour #no i did not just spend a whole hour typing this #i just #i want to scream about it on the rooftops #i needed to get this shit off my chest somewhere else than in my best friend's discord chat #ITS SUBTEXT. ITS STILL SUBTEXT HOW CAN THIS STILL BE SUBTEXT. #ITS CANON #AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH #IM SO FRUSTRATED #long post #lupin iii #lupin iii : castle of cagliostro #hayao miyazaki #lupin the third #jigen #jigen daisuke #daisuke jigen #lupjig #jiglup #lupin x jigen #fire treasure #lupin iii ost #the castle of cagliostro #the hobbit rambles

[alightwhendarknessfell]

Album Review: From Filth And Dust - Lilith Czar

First of all, I'd like to say that this album completely blew me away. From Filth And Dust perfectly showcases Lilith's (formerly known as Juliet Simms) vocal abilities and songwriting skills. The lyrics are meaningful, witty, and raw with emotion. The vocals are clean with just the right amount of grit and pair beautifully with the instrumentals. The album tells the story of a woman who has been through hell and back, who has fought battles both external and internal. The sound is pure rock n' roll. It's not a passive album. You can't help but sing along, experiencing all the emotions the songs pack in.

The album cover, music videos, name change, and new look all work perfectly to create a stand-out album in Czar's discography.

Song Breakdown

Intro Poem: I'm a huge fan of albums with intro tracks. I think if done correctly they can really add a lot to an album and set the tone. I really liked this intro, the transition into Feed My Chaos is phenomenal. It does a good job introducing Lilith and the overarching thems of the album.

Feed My Chaos: Easily one of my favorites on the album, this song is, for lack of better words, badass. One of the heavier tracks, it's loud and in your face with hypnotizing vocals. I think this was the perfect full-length track to start the album off with.

King: The message of this song is exactly what the world needs. The lyrics are powerful and meant to ruffle the feathers of any man who thinks women should shut up and stay in their place. The first time I heard this song I remember thinking "wow, that's exactly how I feel". I hate that we live in a world that is male-dominated, where there is an innate privilege in existing in a body that is seen as "male". If that's the way the world is, then I'm not okay just being a "queen" still subservient to a man. I want to be king, equal power, and equal respect. This song perfectly captures that feeling.

Anarchy: Another one of my favorites, I'm a big fan of political songs and messages in rock. The beat of this song and vocals are top-notch. After the past four years of political insanity and the deliberateness in which the rights of oppressed communities were targeted, this song is cathartic. The end of the song really puts the exclamation point on this track; shots, sirens, and a man's voice over a loudspeaker can be heard in the background. It made me think back to last Summer and the volatile state the country was in. Very nice touch to the song.

100 Little Deaths: Another strong rock track, this is a song easily chanted from the top of your lungs driving down the highway. The message of overcoming your personal struggles is an inspiring one. I also think its placement before the next song, 'Lola' was a great choice. The messages flow together quite well and I like the dichotomy of such a hyped-up song being followed by a slower emotional one.

Lola: This song has grown on me a lot, and I really like it. There is raw emotion in Czar's voice which easily takes center place in this track. It'll have you on the brink of tears but also ready to rise up and sing your heart out. Anyone who's ever hit rock bottom and had to fight to find themself again can relate. The is one of the most open tracks on the album and I think that's what makes it so impactful. One of my favorite lyrics from the album is in this song "Time flies by when you're 25 n' about to die"

Edge of Seventeen: Stevie Nick's fan or not, I think everyone has heard this song. There's a risk that comes with covering an iconic and beloved song, and it really paid off for Czar. This is an amazing cover, her voice fits this song very well.

Bad Love: Another one of my favorites, this song is a masterpiece. It's sultry, exciting, and catchy as fuck. The song speeds up on the chorus and then slows back down for the verses; a rollercoaster that you'll have on repeat for days.

In My Head: When this song started I thought "I'm either going to really, really like this song or hate it". It did not disappoint at all. Clearly a song about fighting the demons in well... "in my head". As someone who struggles with mental health and my own thoughts this song hits home. Lyrically this is probably my favorite song as well, I mean "It gets me off like nothing else, no one fucks me like myself" come on, that's just a fucking cool line.

Unholy: Fuck... I love this song. When I saw the title for this track I had really high expectations because I love rock songs that use religious symbolism with just the right amount of blasphemy. This song gave me everything I wanted from it. I've had it on repeat all day. It's a tie between this song and the next for my #1 favorite on the album.

Burn With Me: This song reminds me of Automatic Love Letter (her old band). I love the sound of this song and the lyrics. This is my type of love song for sure. You can't help but dance around the room while singing along. Czar shows off her vocal abilities and control over her voice, hitting notes that make you go "damn- how the fuck did she do that?!?!".

Diamonds to Dust: The perfect closing song, a slower acoustic track that sums the album up and leaves you wanting more. You can literally hear the emotions in Czar's voice, and like Lola, it's a very raw track. Amazingly well done.

I rarely find albums in which I like all of the songs, but this is one of them. None of the songs feel rushed or unfinished, incredibly well done. Anyone who's written Lilith off before should honestly give this album a listen and let it speak for itself. She's an incredibly talented singer, songwriter, and musician and this album is proof of that. I've unfairly judged her and her music in the past, and I'm so glad I decided to give her and her music another chance. I believe in the message of this album and women supporting women. I can honestly say that I love this album and I highly recommend it.

Total rate: 9/10

Top tracks (in my opinion): Unholy, Burn With Me, Bad Love, Lola

#lilith czar #juliet simms #from filth and dust #album review #rock music #sumerian records

[angelaiswriting]

Of Matches and Dates | Bandit x fem!reader

[video by rodnae productions from pexels]

✏️ Pairing: Bandit x fem!reader

✏️ Summary: with Valentine’s Day around the corner, Dominic’s friends have managed to convince him to download a dating app. (Not requested, but inspired by the lovely @kind-wolf​ as always)

✏️ A/N: this is just a lil something for Valentine’s day. I’m still working on my fluff skills :’) Domi’s dating profile is at the bottom of the fic: it took me forever to make but I’m so proud :’) enjoy 💛

✏️ Warnings: none :’)

✏️ Word-count: 5,274

OF MATCHES AND DATES

 The club is packed — and Dominic is too tired to even care, for once. His back is burning, and there’s a nasty gash on his left thigh that a doctor has stitched up too tightly and that’s constantly making him ground his teeth every time the muscle tenses up.

He’s forgotten whose stupid idea it was to go out clubbing not even three hours after coming back from a mission on the other face of the Earth, but he does remember he’s there to be Eli’s wingman just in case his date dumps him last minute. It won’t happen, of course, but the kid still worries when it comes to a pretty lady he’s matched with on Matcher.

Matcher is the latest novelty at the base, or so that’s the impression he’s had ever since his jet landed not so long ago. Even Monika has signed up for an account — It’s great to pass time, Domi! You should download it, it’s free, or that’s what she said the second before tearing his phone from his hands to download it herself.

“Here, I brought you drink!” Alexsandr tears him from his musings — and the dull soreness still crawling underneath his skin — and unceremoniously slaps a shot of vodka on the small, high table he’s been leaning against. By the time the glass is halfway to his lips, Dominic has the time to notice half of its contents have sloshed out onto the metal surface of that dingy thing; he doesn’t care: he simply tilts his head back, lets the alcohol wash down his throat and prays it’ll numb everything to a low hum.

“Where is everyone else?” he asks, hissing when someone bumps into his back in passing. He doesn’t remember the last time he’s felt like every single muscle in his body felt so pulled and tight, but he’s already set up his mind to barge into Harry’s office the next morning and ask for — or demand — the longest leave he’s ever thought of asking.

Alex shrugs and quickly empties the shot he has in his right hand, for the one in his left is already empty. The bar is right behind them, though, so they both know they’ll be making back and forth more times than one would rather know. “Somewhere in there,” he replies, jutting his chin in the general direction of the mess of bodies behind Dominic’s back. “Adriano has a date, too, so he ditched us.”

“So did Elias, Monika and Seamus.” He turns around briefly, throws a look around to try and see if he can get a glimpse of the friends they’ve come here with, but miserably fails.

“Stupid dating apps, making men our age third-wheel like this.” Alexsandr groans something in Russian then, but it’s under his breath and Dominic would never be able to tell what that was with the noise in there — he also doesn’t speak Russian, he finds himself realizing a minute too late. “But I met the French at the bar, they rented out a VIP room for the night.”

“We should gatecrash it.”

Ten minutes later, eight of which spent downing one drink after the other in the vain attempt to outdrink each other, both men walk into the French’s VIP room behind Gustave Kateb, whose English has already started slurring into French when he doesn’t focus enough.

The French aren’t the only people there: Marius sends Dominic a pleading look as Lion fills his head with his usual bullshit, and a bunch of recruits who’ve somehow had the chance to hang around the more seasoned operators sit on the couch on the far left of the room and listen to what Y/N and Finka are enlightening them with. The two women turn around to greet them and although Dominic’s eyes trail down the plummeting neckline of Y/N’s shimmery top, he still has enough attention to spare to notice how the rookies hang from her lips as she keeps on talking.

Alexsandr’s exclamation of jubilee, however, tears him from the sight of the only one he’s had a crush on for a long time now and there’s nothing he can do to stop the other from dragging him towards the couch Montagne is sitting on with not one, not two, but three bottles of vodka on the low table in front of him.

“What do a Russian, a French and a German have in common?” Gilles asks, raising a shot glass and chuckling drunkenly as icy droplets of alcohol trail down the glass and onto the still-bruised skin between his right thumb and forefinger.

“Their hatred for this goddamn dating app?”

But Alex slaps him up the back of his head as he takes the shot their tipsy friend is handing him. “Alcohol!” he booms, making more than a couple of heads turn around before drinking his glass dry as though it didn’t contain but water.

They end up sitting together, Dominic to the right and Alexsandr to the left of Montagne, their knees pressing into each other’s as they joke and drink. They’re the only three in the room that have just come back from a mission abroad, and no one comes to bother them for a long time as they try to relax and let go. The topic of discussion, however, quickly shifts back to the fucking dating app.

Matcher seems to be all the rage, and it somehow manages to sneak its way into even the most unassuming conversations. Neither of them would by now be able to assert with utmost certainty if there truly is someone at the base that doesn’t use it — apart from the people that have spent the last two weeks on a mission, completely detached from the civilian world, that is.

“I’ve heard Blitz has already had something like fifteen dates so far, in less than three weeks at that!” Gilles’ English is softened and slurred out by his French, the same French that always comes back every time he goes beyond a certain threshold when it comes to drinking.

“Fifteen?!” Alexsandr almost cries out, comically counting on his fingers until he’s reached the right number, almost as though by doing that, he’ll be able to fully comprehend the extent of Elias’ adventures.

“He’s fucked with only seven of them, though,” adds Dominic, tipping down another shot before leaning back against his seat, spreading his arms on the backrest and letting his hands hang against the cool faux leather.

Yet again, Alex counts on his fingers — up to seven, and then up to fifteen, just to see how big the difference between the two is. “Christ,” is his only comment just before he takes a long sip straight from the bottle, long enough to finish the two fingers of liquid that remain in it.

“Monique made me download it,” and it takes them a minute to put two and two together and realize Gilles is talking about IQ in his frenchified English. “Snatched mon portable from my hands and gave it back with that fucking app on my home screen.”

Dominic scoffs, the French’s experience with his colleague hitting closer to home than he would have thought possible before today. “Did the same to me. If you had given her five minutes more, she would’ve created an account for you like she did mine.”

They’re curious, both the French and the Russian, and while Gilles is chill, Dominic knows Alexsandr is not going to let him live this down. So, their quick Show us! turns into some rearranging on their seats so that Dominic ends up finding himself trapped between his two friends, looming over him like some vultures.

“Since when do you like cooking dates?” asks Alex when the app opens on Dominic’s personal profile page.

“Monika chose everything, said ‘pussy’ isn’t respectable enough as an interest. Cooking dates apparently work better at getting women, or so she says.”

“You sure she didn’t want you to match up with her?”

“Don’t listen to Frenchie, show us who it makes you match with!” Alex’s hand is quick at shooting out, but Dominic is quicker, pulling his phone away so that his now pouting friend can’t get a hold of it.

“I’ll use it. I don’t want you messing up my app.”

“I thought you didn’t like the idea of having it.”

“And I don’t! I’m just bored!”

But he still touches the search icon, and the other two almost hold their breaths as they wait for the shitty reception inside the club to allow the page to fully load and replace the pulsating hearts of the logo to leave their place to profile pictures.

The first is a 37-year-old woman with curly ginger hair and eyes of two different colors — they’re both brown, but there’s some blue in the left one, as well.

“Pretty,” says Gilles just as Dominic reads what her profession is — florist. “Match with her.”

But Dom is good — and he tells them that, pushing their hands away from his phone to prevent them from doing things with his app. “Make your own account and stop bugging me about mine,” he replies as his fingers tap the bubble with the golden star icon — not a match, more like a ‘save for later’ and although he’s had plenty of one-night stands, ‘saving’ someone ‘for later’ makes him feel fifty different shades of dirty.

The second woman is South African, a bit too far away, but with his job, he could end up anywhere in the world. So, he saves Bea for later before Alex makes him change his search parameters so that the system would find people closer to his actual location.

There’s a barista he’s seen plenty of times at the pub he and Marius often go to. She’s pretty, on the tall side, with hair cut chin-level short and a tattoo that snakes its way up the side of her neck and that he now sees trails down deeper underneath the low-cut tank top she’s wearing in her profile picture. Matcher says her name is Andrea, so he can now put his curiosity to sleep and stop wondering how he should call her.

Alexsandr taps the two-heart button to match him up with her before he can stop him, and the three of them sit there for a long time — or so at least it seems, with the rest of the party blatantly ignoring them as operators come and go as they please — checking out women and deciding what to do with them. And really, it sounds so bad in Dom’s mind when he puts it into those words — they’re judging someone based on one picture and literally three other facts about them — but that’s still the truth of the thing. Some women end up in the starred ‘save for later’ section — which they’ve found out is much nicer than it seems and it’s just a way to still be able to chat without necessarily match yet —, some get skipped, and Andrea is still the only one in his matches — she still has to match back with him, and deep down Dominic can’t help but wonder how their next encounter at the pub is going to feel like.

It’s endless profiles later, when Montagne stands up to ‘go piss’ — or so he says, kicking finesse out of the window — that a familiar face pops up on the app.

Alex chuckles, almost choking on his hundredth vodka, taken by the surprise of such a sight. “Hey! But that’s —” He’s cut off when Dominic elbows him in his left side, where he knows Alex is bruised — there’s no need to yell Y/N’s name in a room full of people drinking, talking and — he notices when he quickly looks around to make sure no one is paying them any mind — making out in the love-seat in a corner.

Dominic should have expected it, really, Monika did tell him everyone and their mother has downloaded Matcher at the base, and that includes Y/N, but he’s still taken aback because he’s had a crush on her for the longest time now and while he has balls of steel and he’s known for it, he still has… problems approaching her when it doesn’t come to missions or training.

But by God, is she pretty! Both in-person and in that picture still floating on his screen. There’s a sunflower field behind her and she’s sporting trekking boots, camo shorts, and a white tank top on a dusty, Ukrainian road. He was there, when the picture was taken — seven months ago, during the last mission they had been deployed to together — with a bunch of other operators, of course. They had taken a couple of days off when things had been wrapped and some of them had stayed behind before finally coming back to Hereford.

And there she is, grinning at him from up close — technologically speaking, that is —, dog tags disappearing between her breasts under her tank top and her head tilted to the side, eyes almost squinting against the late-morning sun. There’s everything on her profile bubble — less than ten miles away, her age, her country of origin, and then that vague ‘police’ typed out next to the white icon of a briefcase, a description Monika’s put into his profile as well.

“So?” But Alex is distracted by Gilles coming back and sitting down once again next to Dominic, and he doesn’t continue.

“Found anyone interesting while I was gone?”

“Y/N,” is Alex’s unsolicited reply. “But this chicken won’t do shit about it.”

Dominic groans. “Why do you have to be so annoying? Jesus! There, matched her. You happy now?” he complains, tapping the match! bubble with the two hearts before he has much time to overthink. “It’ll make for a good laugh when she opens her app.”

They’re all bored anyway, and he’s known for — almost — always choosing the fun way of doing something. She will match him, send him a haha domi gotcha! great to see u on this app — all lowercase, often with that ‘u’ instead of ‘you’ — through the chat feature, and then they’ll be able to laugh it off during training. It could make for a nice sort of inside joke, he muses as he puts his phone away for the night and reaches for the bottle of vodka.

By the time his friends drag him back to the dance floor to try and loosen up their sore muscles, he’s received some matching requests and more than just ‘a few’ messages in his chat from so many different people that he feels his head is spinning.

It’s early morning already when he, Alex and Gilles wait for their Uber to come and pick them up, all of them with more drinks in their body than there is water. The other two have downloaded Matcher for shits and giggles and are now busy sorting through their recommended profiles.

They’ve all warmed up to it — they’ve all used other dating apps in the past, so one more is not a problem, even more when they’re easily bored and with fewer and fewer ideas on how to pass the time they spend between missions.

It’s only when Alexsandr complains that Why am I not getting hot operators too? with a comic pout on his face that Dominic’s phone goes off vibrating in the back pocket of his pants for the millionth time. He picks it out to finally delete the stupid app — too many notifications in too little time, and he’s too tired to be patient.

The notification message reads It’s a match! with an obnoxious sparkling heart emoji, though, and that suddenly turns his mood around and makes him curious. He hasn’t got a real, mutual match yet, just lots of stars that are probably enough to light up the night sky. So he unlocks his phone, opens the app, and after the rather-cheesy explosion of hearts going off on the screen, he finally sees who’s matched him back and the name both knocks the wind out of him and makes him laugh, all at the same time.

*

He brings it up to her the next day. It’s just after his training session, when he’s walking around the grounds of the Base to take his mind off of things and Y/N is leaving the armory facility. She waves at him, and he can’t but jog up to her to walk with her for a bit.

There’s some small talk, stuff about plans for this next stretch of time before a mission, catching up like friends or colleagues do, and then he drops it — Now that we’ve matched on that dating app, we should go on a date! He says it with a smile in his eyes and laughter in his voice, but it all fades into silence when he realizes that what he’s seeing on her face is confusion.

“What are you talking about?”

He frowns. Maybe she doesn’t remember it. “We matched on Matcher last night. I got your notification when I left the club.” It comes off as a question — what could have been an attempt at shooting his shot in a best-case scenario or something done out of fun in any other case, seems to be quickly turning around to bite him in the ass.

The look on her face is of utter mortification as she looks up at him, realization slowly and then quickly catching up on her like some avalanche. ‘Mortified’ is the last thing he would have thought to see on her face, and he’s taken aback, for once he doesn’t know what he’s supposed to do. Maybe she doesn’t do older. Or she doesn’t do colleagues. Or maybe she sees him as a big brother — most of the recruits seem to somehow see him that way for the first months, despite him never doing anything to even remotely prompt that kind of behavior.

“Shit, I’m so sorry!” she finally says, hiding her face behind her hands. “I was shit-faced last night. Lera and I were fucking around with my app since she says I always get the hot ones, I must’ve done it at that moment. I didn’t think I’d get people from the Base, I’m so sorry. Forget about that, please: I didn’t want to make things weird.”

He’s… bummed, there’s no other way to put it. It kind of stings his pride, in a way, but he sees where she’s coming from. He just… didn’t expect for her to not take it jokingly — after all, they are similar in that, and their sense of humor always makes them find the fun side in almost anything.

“Nah, don’t worry.”

But he’s still thinking about it three days later, and both Marius and Elias, and then Monika, Gilles and Alex as well, have tried to come up with a way to fix it — they don’t exactly know what needs fixing, it’s just a stupid dating app, but the look in Y/N’s eyes is still mortified every time Dominic crosses her path.

It’s only when he’s chilling with Lera and Elias on Wednesday night, discussing possible plans for Valentine’s day, coming up on Sunday, that the topic of Matcher and the apparently dramatic match with Y/N crawls its way into the conversation once more. It’s just the three of them in the lounge room, feet up on the coffee table or on the long part of the L-shaped couch, legs crossed at the ankles.

And for a moment it’s like going back to stupid high school crushes when Lera lets it slip that Y/N is simply too embarrassed to admit that she squealed and giggled like a teenager when she got Domi’s match request over the weekend. That that is the reason why she’s so mortified and she — Lera — is tired of trying to convince her that there’s nothing wrong in finding a colleague hot. Brunsmeier is a handsome man, I’d be surprised if the thought had never crossed your mind! — that’s how she recounts it, glancing at Dominic and shrugging her shoulders.

“She’s just afraid the truth might come out,” she says. “To which I’m not opposed, I’m tired of hearing her babble about it every time she starts doubting herself.”

At first, Dominic’s only reply is a pensive hum as he brings the almost-empty beer bottle to his lips for a sip. “I didn’t think she’d somehow take it personally. I would’ve expected her to joke about it, that’s why I was confused.”

They end up thinking of a plan — send her flowers and chocolates, with a note attached, and then show up at her and Lera’s shared dorm room to take her out on a Valentine’s date. His playful crush isn’t that much of a secret when it comes to his friends, after all: he does get drunk — eventually — and he does let his tongue loose — loose enough to hint at stuff he wouldn’t exactly boast while sober.

So, the next day, they put their plan into motion. A delivery man delivers Y/N the biggest bouquet of roses Dominic has managed to find on the website of a nearby flower shop at almost one in the morning, and it’s not only a surprise to her, but to all the operators and recruits that have stayed behind in the mess hall after breakfast as well.

They watch as she eyes the bouquet, lips parted, a frown of almost suspicion on her face — and from that table, Lera sends him a knowing smirk and a raise of an eyebrow that seems to tell him that she was not expecting such an obnoxious thing.

The exchange doesn’t miss Monika’s eye, and the operator is quick at putting two and two together. She slaps his bicep, and when he turns around to glare at her, almost intimidating her to shut her mouth, she smirks. “Look at you, who would’ve thought?” Her German is hushed, and it makes their fellow German colleagues chuckle, too. “Decided to make a move?”

“Oh, shut up.”

“I told you that app wasn’t that bad!” she adds when Elias tells her how things have come to that.

The next day, Dominic makes sure Lera leaves his box of Swiss pralines on Y/N’s bed — and she promptly texts him back when her roommate and friend finds it after her monthly session in Harry’s office.

When Saturday comes around, Y/N’s confusion has taken the place of the mortified look in her eyes, and Lera has started trying to convince him to come forward before her friend would start thinking of some joke. Y/N’s not the type to get spooked out — a last-minute secret admirer just in time for Valentine’s day delivering gifts is the least dangerous thing she’s probably ever come across, but he knows it’s time to ask her out.

He finds her in the very lounge room Elias and Lera talked him into moving things forward. She’s sitting on the window bench, staring out at the park of the base and at the flour-like snowflakes coming down and twirling in the wind, before it turns into rain before nightfall.

“Hey,” she greets him before he has time to make a sound, seeing his reflection in the windowpane. “If you’re going to tease me for the ginormous bouquet I got the other day like everyone else did, please don’t.” She chuckles, though, and turns around when he sits at the other end of the bench.

“Nah, I won’t be childish this time.” There’s a grin on his face as he pulls his feet up and rests his arms on his bent knees, teasing her own leg with a foot for a moment just to make her laugh. “Have any clues on who the secret admirer is?”

She shrugs her shoulders. “I’m quite sure Lera knows who this is, but I haven’t been able to tear it out of her yet.”

It’s quiet for a while before Dominic starts saying Look, there’s something I— before he stops mid-sentence and looks up at her. She’s staring back at him almost expectantly, when someone dashes through the hall and distracts them for a moment.

“I’m sorry that match made you feel the way it did,” he says, “but I’m still glad I sent my request. And I know deep down you are too, you’re just afraid of things going the wrong way.” When she frowns, her lips parting, he scoots closed and lays a hand on her knee. “A little bird told me.”

“Yeah, a Russian one, maybe?” She covers her face with her hands, much like she did at the beginning of the week, before she sighs. “Lera likes to babble.”

“I don’t mind.” His hand gives her knee a gentle squeeze, and he waits for her to look at him again. “It finally gave me the excuse to ask you out on Valentine’s day. If you’re down for it, that is.”

*

On Sunday, he shows up at her door at half-past six, wearing fucking tux pants for once in his life. He’s cleaned up nice — trimmed his beard a bit, combed his hair back with some cream, stole a few drops of Alex’s perfume when he and Gilles made themselves at home in his room while he was getting ready. She’s begged him to skip the roses next time, and so he’s standing there with a bunch of wildflowers in one hand, wondering why the fuck there’s butterflies in his stomach.

She’s just as beautiful as ever when she opens the door, and Lera is nowhere to be found when she invites him in so that she can put his flowers in some water. Red dress, black coat, killer heels, painted lips — she almost takes his breath away.

“You’re stunning.” The honesty in his voice makes her stutter for a moment before he lets her give him a hug.

“You’re not any less,” she grins, pecking his cheek before following him outside and then to the garage level.

He makes her ride behind him on his bike, and the dinner at the overpriced fancy restaurant he’s managed to book last-minute passes in a flash. But even despite that, he doesn’t miss the way she warms up — and opens up — the more they chat: long gone is the mortification he knows she’s felt at the idea of possibly having made things awkward or of having given her crush on him away, and they actually find themselves getting to know each other better through tales from both missions and their civilian lives and childhood.

When they’re forced to leave the restaurant to leave their place to the second turn of patrons on such a busy February night, they walk around the center of the city arm in arm, both wrapped up tightly in their jackets and with their helmets in hand. They talk and talk, and the more they do, the more that faint shadow of embarrassment they felt throughout the week evaporates from their shoulders much like the condensation leaving their lips.

Neither of them is in the mood to return to Hereford just yet. It’s nice to be out and about, doing normal things, falling for what Dominic considers a well-thought-out marketing strategy — although he won’t lie by saying he’d rather be doing something else tonight, or spend time with someone else.

“I’m glad you matched me,” she suddenly confesses, the both of them hurrying up to cross the street before the traffic light turns red. “I would’ve never had the guts to. And I’m glad you did what you did and that we’re now here.”

He grins at her, pulling her closer into his side by wrapping an arm around her shoulders. “Vodka is the best remedy against bullshitting instead of taking action,” he jokes, and she laughs.

He stares at her as she does, unable to keep in that chuckle.

“Yeah, I’m sure, Sanya always says the same bullshit,” she laughs, shaking her head before pointing at the bowling alley with her helmet, her other arm wrapped securely around his waist. “I don’t wanna go back yet. What do you think about some bowling?”

When they get back at the Base at around three in the morning, Dominic has a rip in the crotch of his pants and they’re both still giggling like kids at the memory of how comically loud the ripping sound seemed when he bent to throw his ball. They were joking around, in the bowling track further from the entrance, when it happened and she had to stand right behind him as he walked back to their booth, both of them laughing loudly, his cheeks burning red in an uncharacteristic moment of embarrassment.

“Bring me your pants when you wake up, I’ll fix them for you,” she chuckles, her hand still wrapped tightly in his.

“We should go bowling again,” he replies instead, looking down at her, now a bit shorter since she’s walking barefoot, her heels in his other hand. “With a proper attire this time, though.”

“Sure, why not?” Her excitement makes him smile, and even in the night lights always on throughout the Base during the night, he can see how her eyes seem to grin up at him. “I’d be ecstatic to watch you lose miserably a second time.”

“You only had luck!” But it’s not a real complaint — after all, he is shit at bowling, but he’s loved spending tonight with her and he’d be happy to replicate it more than just once. “And I let you win.”

“Of course.” Her chuckle is low now that they’re in the sleeping quarters.

And although they should go to bed and get ready for the day of training and simulations awaiting for them when they wake up, they still seem to linger, standing there, in front of the door of her dorm, still hand in hand, smiling at each other.

“Thank you for tonight,” she says eventually, taking a step closer to give him a quick good-night hug, and she grabs her heels when he hands them to her.

“Likewise. I really enjoyed it. We should do it again.” He puts the idea out there, but when she smiles sweetly at him all his doubts seem to sizzle and evaporate.

“We should,” she nods, her fingers playing with his. 

“Just ring me up when you’re free from your Matcher dates,” he grins, winking at her, hinting at the quite numerous dates she told him she had since downloading the app.

“Nah, I’m deleting it. I got the one match that matters most, so there’s no reason in keeping on looking.” She balances herself by putting both hands on his shoulders and pecks the corner of his mouth. “Good night, Domi.”

When he opens the door of his room, still grinning, the last thing he’s expecting to find is some of his friends waiting around for him just to know how his date has gone.

“So?” Monika asks, standing up from where she’s been sitting in his desk chair, eyes tired and hair tousled.

“We brought vodka,” Alex grins, raising an almost empty bottle while Gilles points at the empty glasses on the nightstand. “We’ve been waiting for this day for too long!”

“Sorry, man,” Marius says from his bed, both eyes closed and ankles crossed.

“We couldn’t stop them and shooting them dead wasn’t an option,” is what Elias aads, and Dominic knows it’s going to be a long night. But when he’s done talking, he knows he’s deleting that goddamn app, too.

[credits: psd (mine) | dominic | random guy #1 | random guy #2]

Feedback is always welcome if you want to drop old me a line 💛

#dominic brunsmeier #r6s bandit #dominic brunsmeier x reader #r6s bandit x reader #r6s imagine #dominic brunsmeier imagine #r6s bandit imagine #rainbow six siege imagine #angelaiswriting

[its-an-inxp-again]

Hey

Idk if you ever got the answer to your thing. But I’m a person who is queer but regularly uses the term lesbian to make things simpler. I can tell you why I hate the phrase monosexual- it feels transphobic to me- I am not attracted to men at all, but I am attracted to women, non-binary folks, gender queer folks, and agender folks. If I was with a partner and they transitioned to be a man I would still love them. That wouldn’t change. Sexuality is fluid and calling someone monosexual seems to erase that and really put people in boxes. Everyone has exceptions. And as someone who has identified as bisexual and pansexual in the past and find those not to suit me and fit right (especially since I am not sexually/romantically attracted to people physically/based on appearances- it’s more about personality and what I could do with a person)

I don’t mean this in an antagonistic way, I really hope it doesn’t come off that way(I’m bad expressing myself sorry).

(I’m sorry, I know you’re not trying to be rude. My answer, however, will sound rude and upset because you touched upon some stuff that needs a lot of unpacking to me lmao. Just know this anger is not necessarily directed at you but at biphobia in general.)

Why do bisexual people may need to use the term monosexual?

A. It is descriptive

I see what you mean but as you said you're queer and lesbian is a term to make things simpler, right?

So I wouldnt call you monosexual because you’re clearly not attracted to only one gender (but if you want to who I am to stop you?). Monosexual is someone who is almost exclusively dating/is attracted to people of one gender. There are plenty trans people that are straight or gay that would NOT date a partner if they realized they were a different gender. For real: kat blaque made a video (here it is if youre interested) on youtube about this - she’s trans and she wants to date men and wouldnt feel comfortable on continuing dating if a partner of hers realized they were actually a trans woman all along. She wants to date guys not girls and that's FINE it just means A. She actually recognizes the girl gender, obviously B. She's straight af and that's wonderful! It’s not a box if that’s how her experience is and she likes it that way!

Also how is being monosexual transphobic? Cant a girl just like guys exclusively (both cis and trans) or like girls exclusively (both cis and trans)? It's not even enbyphobic since you dont need to be attracted to a person to support their rights. (Gay men arent attracted to women but can be 100% feminists.) Being open to fuck somebody is not the same as supporting their rights: fetishization is a thing. Again, I refer to the video Kat Blaque made.

Sexuality IS fluid but to some people (like me and you) it is more than others. Some people don’t feel comfortable dating people that dont fall into the gender theyre usually attracted to and thats 100% okay.

B. It helps in talking about biphobia and panphobia in society

Biphobia and panphobia are for the large part based on the assumption that you cant be attracted to more than one gender (not even non-binary and so on) and that if you do you're weird/disgusting/mentally ill/a sexual predator. I can tell you 100% that's the narrative both straight and gay people can and may perpetuate since I struggle w this kind of shit every single time Im attracted to someone no matter their gender (YES, EVEN IF THEY'RE A GUY, BECAUSE THE OTHER DAY I WAS ATTRACTED TO A GIRL AND NOW I FEEL LIKE A FUCKING ANIMAL THAT CANT CONTROL ITSELF, even though it makes NO sense because if it was two girls or two boys the actual number of people my hormones activated to wouldnt change, but it would make my experience not subjected to biphobia!). I’m not saying gay people are the same as straight people. But I do feel alienated BOTH from heteronormative society AND from (subtly biphobic) gay spaces because of my bisexuality. I costantly feel like I’m outside both of those worlds and you know how humans are: I just need a term to encompass it all easily, to say “I don’t identify with any of this” (which is both straight and strictly gay spaces: ie, monosexual). To me is literally the same as saying non-bisexual/non-pansexual.

I dont mean to say lesbians or gays have it easier or are just like straight people. But we do have different experiences and I need terms to express that. It honestly doesnt matter to me if you identify as lesbian or queer (though I think you’re implying you’re more queer than anything). But I do need a term to talk about how society at large treats sexuality; ie, as a monosexual thing. Another concept that’s been thrown around is bi erasure. A strictly monosexual society is bound to view a girl dating a girl (or girl presenting) as if theyre both LESBIANS and erase a queer person the moment they’re in a m/f relationship, because people cant COMPUTE that it may not be the case and that the girl dating a cis straight dude isnt betraying her queerness.To think so is basic biphobia.

In some ways, I think it’s the same as when transgender people started using the term cisgender - which is applicable to both straight people and queer/gay people. They simply needed a term which meant “not-trans” as they were saying “I dont identify with this” (ie the cisgender experience). Does it imply that cisgender people, no matter if queer, have something in common? Yeah, yeah it does. Does it imply that queer people are just the same as straight people, or face no oppression? Of course not. Seeing people being offended upon being called monosexual feels like people being offended upon being called cis to me.

Also, saying that the terms bisexual people use are transphobic is almost implying that bisexuality is inherently transphobic? Or reeks to me of that kind of rhetoric. I use the terms I need to use, just like any other marginilized group does, and nobody outside of that group has any right of denying me that. It’s like I’m trying to create a safe space for myself and people like me and yall come around to judge us YET AGAIN. And I'm just tired of hearing this bullshit. I could accept this kind of criticism only if it came from a trans person themselves, I guess? But it’s not usually trans people who accuse us of being transphobic, in fact, many trans people identify as bisexual and use bisexual terminology lmfao.

“Hearts not parts” rhetoric

Finally, about personality being superior to physical appearance. That's amazing but I do want to note that, not you necessarily, but many people who are into the “hearts not parts” rhetoric are, how can I say this. Slut-shaming people? I’m not sure if you are doing this but I feel it needs to be said just to be sure. A lesbian trans woman can be just attracted to a girl for her physical appearance and just want to fuck her - and THAT'S OKAY. That's fine. I am a sexually attracted to people and that doesnt mean I have to form a deep bond first. Sex positivity is about accepting that people can feel like this and not shame them for this. "Hearts not parts” rhetoric has in the past infantilized, sanitized or outright shamed other queer experiences. It's fine if you feel that way but dont start acting like you're morally superior because of that. That's catholicism with extra steps. My bisexuality its not the symptom of some predatory and animalistic thing that should be purified into something more palatable and less sexual. That’s the same thing they used to say about gay people and now gay (biphobic) people are using this against us. That’s also the kind of thing trans women (especially if they’re sapphic) constantly hear every fucking day. Queer people have a good part of their discrimination rooted in the shaming of purely sexual desires. Forcing ourselves to be more palatable and less sexual is just respectability politics. I’m tired of it. (This is obviously different from being on the asexual spectrum: but you dont see ace people going around pretending they’re morally superior than everybody else, and many are actually very sex positive)   You would still love your partner if they were a different gender: that’s great, but that’s not how some (most) people feel, and they aren’t superficial because of this, just different from you.

Also, I think you’d really benefit from hearing a trans person say they don’t care if someone has genitalia preferences. Here it is. This obviously doesnt mean that every trans person will feel like she does, but it does mean that we can’t generalize trans experiences/preferences/what they feel transphobia is. Just like straight people dont get to say what’s homophobic or not, cis people dont get to say what’s transphobic or not. The definition of those terms relies entirely on the community that is targeted by these things.

I hope this wasnt excessively confusing but I wanted to make my point clear.

#ask #anon ask #sometimes i say stuff #tw biphobia #tw transphobia #tw panphobia #tw queerphobia #lgbt #lgbtqia

[artificialqueens]

I'm Not Into Sometimes, Chapter 2 (Rosnali) - SnowBun

A/N: Very proud of this chapter <3 finally feel myself getting back to the writing style I enjoy the most. I hope you like reading this is as much as I like writing it. much love everyone xx

Summary: When Denali goes viral for posting a dance video, she doesn’t expect it to lead her to becoming a choreographer for Rosé, an up and coming singer destined for fame. Denali thinks that this might be her first (and only) shot at achieving her dream. If only her dream wasn’t wrapped up in a flurry of pink hair, charm and a supposedly professional relationship.

—

Release comes in the sound of blades scraping against ice. It is the feeling of her core tightening as she pushes off the ground and becomes the world turning on its axis. She is this moment of weightlessness and control.

Then her head begins to fog with visions of spinning rose-colored tops across a dark wooden floor, so endlessly mesmerizing. Her mind fills with questions of intrigue and challenge, the first time she’s ever seen duality so up close. Oh, to be so breathlessly enamored by beauty and talent.

It’s the loss of focus that weighs her down, causing her to land shakily on her right foot. She extends her left leg for balance and slides not-so-gracefully on the ice. She hears Olivia cheer in the sidelines, all bright white smile and wonder. It brings her back to the rink and away from the studio.

She skates over, pressing her forehead to the fence. “It’s not so bad.” She thinks. The rest of the world is slowly but surely getting hooked on Rosé, and she lives up to every expectation and more. She thinks it’s perfectly normal to feel a little charmed by her.

Even if she was a bitch at first.

“What’s wrong?”

Then again, she can’t quite answer Olivia’s question. She isn’t a fan from half way across the world. She’s the damn choreographer. She’s in New York, seeing her old friends and grasping onto her dream.

Said dream just had to come in the form of pink hair and clear brown eyes.

She shakes her head and smiles. “Nothing’s wrong, Liv.”

—

At first, she thinks she’s just so tired that she’s seeing things. When she blinks, she realizes that her eyes aren’t lying and that Rosé really is right there, sitting on the dance studio floor at 6:30 in the morning. She’s staring at intently at her phone, with an expression that can only be described as upset fury. She becomes too absorbed in typing to even notice Denali come in.

“Hey.”

She looks up and her face softens into a small smile. There it goes again, that weird feeling of nakedness that comes with being looked at by those eyes. The combination of this and the lack of sleep is disconcerting, but she manages to smile back anyway.

“Hey.” Rosé procures a coffee cup from behind her and reaches up to pass it. “I got you coffee.”

It takes her a minute to process, way too taken aback by the gesture. She’s always prided herself on being difficult to phase, but when a woman who is basically her employer that she barely knows hands her coffee, it’s hard not to act surprised.

Nonetheless, she accepts it gratefully, muttering a ‘thanks’ as she sits down on the floor beside her.

For a while, she stills as Rosé continues to type with such force that Denali’s scared that she might end up cracking the screen somehow. She wonders in silence, but she’d be lying if she says she’s not tempted to cross the arbitrary line and ask if something is wrong.

“Sorry.” Rosé’s voice suddenly rings clear, but the world around them still feels quiet, tranquil almost. “Just a lot of stuff that needs to get done before the video shoot.”

“Mmm,” Denali says, as she sips her coffee. “It’s fine, I don’t mind.”

Even if the phone has been tucked into the pocket of her bag, Rosé opts for stretching out her legs in front of her and yawning instead of getting up. She turns her head to look at the choreographer whose gaze is directed at the cup in her hand.

“So,” She draws out the word lazily, cocking her head to the side. “Can I ask you a question?”

“Yeah, sure.”

“What do you think of Phenomenon?”

It’s a difficult question to answer. If she says something bad, she’s kicked off this project. If she says something good, she’s just kissing ass. She knows that the only right answer to this question is her own opinion, but when her mother told her that honesty is the best policy, she’s not sure this is the situation that she had in mind.

“Honestly?” Rosé nods. “I think it’s great. The lyrics are good, the production is amazing, your vocals are fantastic. Plus it’s your own brand of witty and self-assured. Not sure what’s not to like there.”

She isn’t sure if this was the answer Rosé expected from her. All she hears is a sigh and they sink once again into that comfortable silence while Denali finishes her coffee. She doesn’t really know much, or anything really, about the woman beside her, but in the stillness of the morning, she feels comfortable.

“Right,” Rosé’s voice is soft and she hates herself for the ache that starts to bloom in her chest. “What’s not to like?”

She tries to ignore it, that stupid idea that this true vulnerability and not just small talk between colleagues; but she sees those eyes staring into the empty space, watches the beams of sunlight give her a blush halo. The ache spreads through her body and she bites her tongue to stop from begging to know what she could possibly not like.

Denali stands up and throws away her cup in a bin in the corner of the room. “Anyway,” She reaches out a hand to help her up. “We should get to work.”

Rosé smirks up at her and she thinks that the ache is threatening to cause an implosion. “Oh, so she’s all work and no play, huh?” She says, grabbing at her hand.

Then they’re face to face and Denali can feel the tug, that back and forth that comes with the competition that is flirting. She laughs a little, tries her best to play it cool. “I have to work hard if I want to play hard, don’t I?”

She walks away with a pair of eyes on her back and an ache that won’t go away.

—

“Are you going to spill all the tea now or what?”

Her eyebrows raise behind the glass of vodka cranberry that she’s holding. Of course, Mik wants to get straight to the gossip. She’d be surprised with any other conversation starter to their Friday night, almost a week since she’d arrived in New York. The bar Mik chose is a little too crowded for her taste, filled with other women who have been eyeing her. She notices but she ignores it in favor of the woman in front of her.

“What happened to ‘how have you been, Denali?’ or ‘how’s New York, Denali?’”

“Okay whatever,” Mik rolls her eyes. “How are you?”

“Tired.” She answers in a heartbeat.

“And would that have anything to do with a certain singer whose name rhymes with… shit, I can’t think of anything.”

She purses her lips together. If she’s honest, working with Rosé is probably the least tiring thing on her agenda. The ice skating in the early evenings as a bid to tire herself to sleep hasn’t been working. All its led to is sleepless nights staring at the ceiling until she sees the first vestiges of day creep through the windows, signaling another turn on the earth’s axis.

In the studio with Rosé, she can at the very least find some peace. The understanding that they are both good at what they do and the comfort of knowing that each day with her is a chance to know her more drives her to get out of bed and into the studio.

“A part of it, yeah.” It’s the tiniest bit of truth and Mik doesn’t look one bit sated by it. “What else am I supposed to tell you?”

“Oh, come on,” It’s that signature Mik whine that finally gets a laugh out of her. “You have to tell me something, anything!”

“You’re an MUA that works with runway models. You know enough famous people as it is.”

“That doesn’t make me any less curious about them.”

She bites her tongue when she hears those words. It’s not like she’s any different. Every morning with Rosé is an established routine with coffee and curiosity on both ends. The existing respect for each other’s craft makes them both wonder about the person underneath.

So, they start to ask questions. How’s New York? Where’d you get the coffee? How’s your morning? What’s the name of that guy on TV who used to host Fear Factor and is a shithead now?

Like clockwork, the questions morph into flirting. It’s standard, innocent, verging on comfortable even. Rosé is always the first to break into a blush, true to her name. At times, Denali thinks that she may have gone too far, but then she sees those eyes again, all amusement and interest. Each interaction is a chance for the ache to spread somewhere new along with the growing assurance that there’s nothing to dislike.

“I don’t know, okay?” She finally lets out. “We work great together and we get along, but it’s not like, ‘ooo, you’re my new bestie’ or anything like that.”

“Hmm,” Mik lets out a him, popping the straw out of her mouth. “That’s interesting.”

“Why is that interesting?”

“Let’s just say my sources tell me she doesn’t get along with everyone.”

Her eyebrows scrunch together at that. Sure, she understands that Rosé isn’t exactly everyone’s glass of wine, especially with the cold seriousness that she handles her music, but she respects that about her.

What’s not to like?

“Well, I don’t think she’s a bitch, if that’s what you’re asking.”

“Or maybe you want to be her bitch…”

“Oh, fuck you!” She throws a tissue at Mik’s face as the model cackles in delight. Her phone suddenly chimes, a message from an unknown number popping up on the screen.

?: hey, I got your number from Tamisha

“Who is it?”

Damn her and her expressive features. She keeps quiet, brain going at breakneck speed to think of all the reasons why she’s texting on a Friday night when she probably has at least a hundred different parties to go to and a thousand different women trying to catch her eye.

Denali: really hope this is rose and not the guy standing outside Tamisha’s office who keeps asking me out

“It’s just Rosé.” She watches Mik’s mouth turn into an O-shape and she throws another tissue. “No, no, not what you’re thinking, sweetie.”

At least she doesn’t think so. Harmless flirting is one thing, but getting her number from her manager? They keep stepping closer and closer to the line and she thinks she sees the chalk start to smudge.

?: sorry to disappoint, it’s just rosé

Denali: too bad. what’s up?

“She’s texting you on a fucking Friday night.” Mik sounds absolutely dumbfounded. “Sounds a lot more than professional to me.”

She knows that Mik is right. They don’t even have practice tomorrow, so she can’t justify it as a possible cancellation. She’s about to come out with some boldfaced lie when her phone vibrates on the table.

Rose: just thought you should have my number. ps: my name is not rose

Olivia arrives and she slams her phone right down on the table.

“I’m buying us a round of shots.

—

She hates this. She loves this. Saturday morning is now the distant tip-tap of heels against the floor, click in the brain, a switch to her soul. Wake up, wake up, wake up. This is not home, it’s not her hotel room. It’s just a cold floor where she has some peace.

Then she hears that voice, every note of the song a gentle wave rushing in to carry her away from her body. Her eyes are glued shut, but it doesn’t matter when she’s already left her body behind on the shore. The voice grows louder, closer, and the waves start to grow. Her body is too far away now and she’s not sure if her eyes will ever open again.

Wake the fuck up.

“Denali?”

A poke to the ribs sends her rushing back into her own body. An involuntary groan escapes her lips and she hears a laugh from above her. She scrunches her eyes shut, terrified that any form of light might cost her the ability to see.

“What the hell?”

Her voice sounds like a croak to her ears and she manages to roll over onto her back. With a moment of preparation, she cracks open an eye. She’s greeted by the sight of Rosé kneeling over her barely functioning body, clearly trying her best not to laugh. Again, she groans and Rosé can no longer help herself.

“Why are you here?”

Honestly, she’s not sure about the answer to that one. There are bits and pieces of memories from last night printed on the back of her eyelids, but it’s all too fuzzy for her to try to piece together immediately. She remembers the sound of Olivia’s laughter mingling with Mik’s voice as they watched her throw back a seventh shot. The memory causes pain to start creeping into her head and she makes a promise to herself to never drink again.

There’s the sound of shuffling and when she looks up, Rosé isn’t kneeling above her anymore. She assumes that she’s sick and tired of her hungover ass, a perfectly valid response in her opinion. Then she hears humming beside her and sighs, glad that validity has no place in this situation. She closes her eyes again, losing herself to the light behind her eyes to ease the throbbing at her temples.

“Isn’t it a Saturday?”

“Yes.”

“Why are you here?”

“I asked you first.”

Her hands fly up to her face. Rosé is laughing again and the pain starts to spread throughout every part of her head. If only it would subside, maybe she’d finally have the energy to actually be embarrassed about waking up on the floor of her workplace.

“Went drinking.”

“Ah, and how’s that going for you?” There’s a smile in her voice. Fuck it, she thinks as she jumps straight over the line of professionalism with a flip of her middle finger. Oh well, it’s not as if this whole situation has pretty much created a void where the line should be.

“Your turn.”

Rosé goes quiet. She focuses on the sound of their breathing. Inhale, exhale. The expansion of her sides with every controlled gulp of air. She hears a plane overhead, letting the escape of air follow it far away from city streets.

“Just wanted to get away for a while.”

She turns her head, sees pale pink rose petals sprawled out on the dark floor. In the gentle light of a Saturday morning, her eyes break her promise to herself, drinking in the sight of weary beauty. She thinks she’s just hungover, but she believes she’s never seen anyone quite so pretty before.

“Well,” She looks back up at the ceiling, stark white staring back at her. “Same here.”

—

By 10:00 PM, she’s burying herself in sheets. She’s never been much of a fan of stillness, but she thinks the last week might be changing her mind.

A few hours earlier, she’d replied to Mik and Olivia’s texts, asking her if she was okay. She cursed and reassured them in the same breath. When they’d asked her where she’d ended up, she had said, “passed out on the floor.”

Half a truth is good enough, right?

If she had told them everything, she’d have to tell them that she laid in the studio for half an hour with Rosé’s humming the only thing cutting through the pounding in her head. She would have to tell them that she’d stumbled as she got up, letting warm hands guide her as she learned to stand. She’d have to tell them of the exchange of tender smiles, so different from the tug of war of flirtation that she’s accustomed to.

Her phone lights up. She expects Mik or Olivia, even Kahmora. No, she only sees that name and she giggles to herself like a damn teenager, a quiet admission that she’s allowed something to change.

Rose: pls tell me you didn’t go drinking again

Denali: I actually like having more than one brain cell, thanks

Rose: great, don’t want to have to pick you up off the floor again

Denali: won’t you ever let me live it down rose?

Rose: only if you start spelling my name right

Denali: the accent’s too much of an effort

Rose: then use my real name

Denali: ???

Rose: call me rosie

A smile graces her lips and she shoots off one last message. She places her phone on the nightstand and buries herself in the blankets, drifting into her first good sleep in a long time.

Denali: alright, night rosie

—

Monday morning suddenly frees up when Rosé says she has to move their session to the evening to make room for interviews. She fills up the rest of her morning by replying to emails about skating gigs for when she eventually returns home. She has lunch with Mik and Olivia and when they inevitably begin to pry, she stays mum on what she can only now describe as her complicated friendship with Rosé. She returns to the hotel and lets herself sleep, turning the feeling of being well-rested into a brand-new addiction.

When she arrives at the studio at 7, there’s no one there. While it isn’t like Rosé to be late, she doesn’t text. She assumes that she’s coming from yet another one of many interviews that she kindly referred to as, “shitheads trying to get way too personal.”

She settles for freestyling to loosen up while she waits. When the music starts, she feels herself break. Every moment is grounded in her own brand of ferocity and well, sex. There’s comfort in her own body, in the knowing that it is a temple of worship to herself. A signal from her brain to move, a single fluid motion, all indulgent offerings to the pleasure only she will ever feel. She throws herself into the fire and the sensation of pleasure starts to build.

The door opens, but she doesn’t, can’t stop. She feels like she’s hovering over the floor, on the brink of climax. The song peaks and she almost gasps, dropping to her knees and letting her back hit the floor. She takes a deep breath, relishes the feeling of being alive.

“Sorry.” She’s apologizing, but she’s not sure for what.

“I…” For once, Rosé is at a loss for words. Her quick wit has been thrown out the window and is probably being dragged around under the wheels of a taxi. She laughs breathily as she gets to her feet.

When their eyes meet, the air turns heavy with unspoken words and desire. She tries to look away, but she can’t. Brown gazes meet and for the first time, she permits herself the thought of what it would be like to kiss her. Maybe, just maybe, that wouldn’t be so bad after all.

“Uhm, okay! Let’s get started?” Rosé bursts out and she thinks that she might have won this round.

If the singer seems more distracted than usual, she doesn’t say anything about it.

—

The water in the shower is still cold when she receives a text that evening.

Rosie: no need to meet me for the rest of the week. We need four dancers for the video, auditions on wed

The water suddenly seems warm and for the first time in her life, she thinks she’s finally learning what it’s like to lose.

—

#rpdr fanfiction #rosé #denali foxx #rosnali #lesbian au #choreographer au #snowbun #s13 #im not into sometimes

[steponmepinkjun]

I NEVER FINISHED MY STORY OMG. ok so i left off at being too proud to tell my friend she was right and kpop fucked hard. the difference between u and me is that i’m too good of a liar. too good. i kept up the “i hate kpop it’s cringe” facade for ALMOST TWO WHOLE YEARS, I SHIT YOU NOT. why? bc my dumb ass, extra ass, dramatic ass self thought “ok if i’m gonna have to deal with the embarrassment of admitting i’m wrong, i better do it in such an extra ass way it’ll knock ur socks off so hard that YOULL be the one embarrassed not me.” the original plan was to learn the entire choreography to bts dope, bc it’s the song that she told me to listen to and inevitably the song that got me into them, but later switched to bts fire bc i saw too many of those “choreo matches w any song” videos, and then her birthday party came up. and here’s the real kicker. her birthday is April Motherfuckin Fools. so it would be So Perfect for me to reveal my kpopism as a birthday present And a april fools prank in one. so i was Set on the Reveal being on april 1st, but the day rolls around and god that choreo is so fucking hard and i am Not a dancer. never have been. so i abandon that and go ykno what… i’ll do it Next Year. BC MY BITCHASS WAS LIKE NO THE MOMENT IS TOO PERFECT TO DO IT ON A NORMAL ASS DAY ITS GONNA BE ON APRIL FOOLS ON HER GODDAMN BIRTHDAY OR NOT AT ALL. a year rolls by, i’ve told most of our friends except her and they’re all in on it, i’d made so many subtle kpop references to her without her realising they were fully intentional and had too many scares where she almost figured me out but i lied my way out of it, and i’d given up on showing off with choreography bc i couldn’t make that shit look good. i’m not a dancer. i am, however, a rapper, and a damn good one, so i inhaled the agust d mixtape and decided i’d just rap the eminem of kpop’s anthem at her face. in korean. and change the lyrics at the end (if u haven’t listened to agust d, the bridge repeats “i’m sorry” a lot) to “i’m sorry i kept this from u for so long” and “i’m sorry i actually ult got7 not bts” (this was like the april after skz debuted ok i was holding onto got7 for dear life knowing full well skz we’re going to convert me smh) and the best part? she never saw it coming. her official present was a cd with a bunch of kpop on it but she thought it was just a personalised mixtape for her so i told her to play the first song out loud and she knew the song Instantly. it has a long intro so she was like “i guess u did listen when i recommended u this song!! i knew you’d like it since u like rap so much!!” and then i started rapping and i shit u not. she started SCREAMING. like the initial reaction was her jaw dropping and then instinctively covering her mouth but when i kept going and she realised i wasn’t fucking around she just fucking screamed like a banshee. at the end during the sorry bit i threw off my jacket to reveal a got7 shirt on the inside and she fell off her chair and started rolling around on the floor. needless to say it was every bit as satisfying as i thought it’d be LMAOOOO afterwards her ass was like “I CANT BELIEVE U HID THIS FROM ME FOR OVER A YEAR” and when i tried to explain my ego couldn’t take the “i told u so” she was like “you know i wouldn’t have made fun of you for it right? i would just be glad you’re not hating on my boys anymore” so basically i’m a big dramatic fool and she was always too good for me.

don’t mind the weird spaces here my ipad is being all fucky wucky w me rn. damn sad to hear ur sideblog experience didn’t go so well, i’d have shown u the cool side of the fandom if i knew 😤😤 leading u thru the cursed halls of kpop stan tumblr like a sketchy tour guide that’s actually 3 small raccoons stacked on top of each other like a trench coat, like “over here we have the fanfic writers that honestly need to publish a book, over here we have the gif makers that are responsible for my entire camera roll, if we take a quick swerve past the death threat anons and the twt fanwar screenshots - mind ur feet bub the 14 year olds were tryna make a grab for ur ankles - ah here’s the holy grail of shitposts, you might be here for hours, to the right we have the weird aussie side of the fandom that projects our childhoods onto chanlix but also all the members as we decide what their life in australia would’ve been like, and down there is a secret trapdoor to the blogs w endless random headcanons that will make you laugh, cry or blush depending on if the author woke up and decided to choose violence today. enjoy your Stay!” but then again i’m not so active on tumblr anymore (ngl you’ve become the highlight of my tumblr experience these days, interaction wise,) so maybe all my Local Hotspots are inactive now. i know a bunch of them are, it’s sad. “i don’t fw stan twitter for the same reason i don’t hang out in meth dens” oop. guess i’m a meth addict. no but i get u i rly do, it’s a hellhole out there, but the fact that things get shared and spread a lot easier than on tumblr and how short most things have to be (therefor keeping up w my adhd attention span without having to resort to the mental torture that is tiktok, with the added bonus of not always needing headphones.) that i just. couldn’t leave if i tried. maybe i should try being active on tumblr again but it’s a dying site in comparison.

“their music doesn’t consistently hit for me as much as skz” i’m sorry we can’t be friends anymore. what. what. you don’t dramama ramama ramama hey? you don’t feel a little jealousyyyyyy, naega anin? you don’t shoot out, shoot out, shoot out, or aremdaeun love killa love killa? you can’t be your hero du du du du du du du du du dududu? u disappoint me. literally like everyone i know who likes skz music likes mx music like it’s a rite of Passage. they’re kindred spirits, monsta x music is like skz’s music’s cool but mildly heterosexual older brother. neither of them know what a bad song is it runs in the family. and both their music runs in my VEINS. whenever i describe my music taste they’re always the first two that come to mind, skz being my number 1 bc they are my best boys but mx bc of the Flavour. pls listen to the entire the code album then get back to me 😤🙌 ok but fr ur so right they are 7 of the finest men i ever seen (yes i say 7 bc i’m including wonho cause he deserved better and i’ll die on my ot7 bullshit.) like don’t get me started on them either LOL i LITERALLY downloaded that one insta video of changkyun working out his back n arm muscles w his tattoo showing bc i needed that shit saved for Science. they could do Anything w me like frfr. yes vixx is the bdsm contract group i’m telling ya they wildin. or at least they were. it’s been years since their last comeback idk what they’re doing anymore tbh. and yeah that makes sense, savouring the hyperfixation i feel it, but also i’m so attached to skz that i never let it die. like i hyperfixate on other things and other groups but i will Always go back to skz cause they’re my homeboys. hell, they’re my home. being a predebut stay i’ve spent more time w skz than most of my actual family members at this point. but that’s just me you do u boo xx just know that if ur anything like me ur never letting go once skz it’s been my longest lasting fixation cause they hit like Nothing Else Do. ik i’ve already said that but i cannot stress it enough. they’re really special. i’m gonna stop here before i get all sappy and emotional bc i really love those boys so fucking much and i don’t drop the L bomb often. SIDE NOTE I WOULD LIKE TO SEE UR LIST OF GROUPS RANKED BY THORSt. i need to judge ur Taste. and omg cat&dog is such a guilty pleasure song bc the lyrics make me cringe so much bc while pet play can be fun they be doing it in more of an “i’m an innocent soft dogboy uwu” kinda way that just Does Not Sit Right with me. it comes back to the objectifying of asians that asians themselves don’t help in industries like these and maybe i’m looking too far into it when rly it is just wholesome n cute or maybe they are into some pet play shit idk idc i will bop to the song regardless but i will not acknowledge the lyrics nope.

YOURE RIGHT THO SKZ’S OPENNESS IS IN FACT, A BIG DEAL, i’ll grab them for u if u want but i found these twt threads of skz supporting the lgbt community and i just felt a special kind of happiness man like sure the delusional part of me likes going “haha they’re gay” bc my brain likes to imagine them as my polycule of mlm boyfriends bc sometimes thats what gives me the serotonin to get me thru the day ok don’t judge but also bc it’s nice knowing that yes i’ll never know them personally, but at least i can support them knowing they’d respect my gender identity and my pronouns, they’d respect who i choose to love, and that’s already more than the general public can say so shit, it is special! it’s special that they don’t treat being cishet like the norm - they constantly remove gender from their songs and speech entirely, they don’t assume all stays are female anymore, we don’t talk abt the babygirls incident cause we got babystays in the end outta that ok, and it’s just. so refreshing and important to me bc i can’t get that anywhere else!! like my semi ults are the boyz and while i love them very much and there’s no way all 11 of them are straight i refuse, i do get just a little bit sad whenever they she/her their fandom by default and call them their girlfriends n shit even tho i do still identify as a girl, i’m also genderfluid/nonbinary/transmasc, and i have a very love/hate relationship w my womanhood and rarely use she/her pronouns, cause it’s like, do you not see me? see us? the ones who aren’t cishet women? i mean i know kevin does bc he congratulated a fan who came out as nb but it’s just not the same as the openness we get w skz. like how do i trust cishets i could be supporting them as a queer person when in reality they’d call me a slur. what would i know, behind the screen? so it’s so good that skz go the extra mile to make it a safe space for everyone. this is already long enough i will reply to the second half of that ask in another message… tomorrow cause it’s 1am and i’m tired gn -felix bi anon

I'mma have to start putting these under a readmore so that i don't absolutely make everything who is still following me for some reason go totally fucking insane 😂

NDJDHWJJAHFNAKBSJSBFBHHDBDNAJD YOU HAVE NO IDEA THE FACES I WAS MAKING READING THIS, I WAS FUCKING CACKLING AND GASPING EVERY OTHER SENTENCE SO HARD THAT I SCARED THE CATS NDJWHSHSB the fact that you went "oh you want me to get into kpop? Give me a hot minute, and I'll give you a whole ass private concert for free" biduehsjdbd biiiiiiiiiiitch you're a fucking ICON, I stg I could NEVER 😂 (and not just because I couldn't find a tune if you gave me a printed set of Google maps directions and that I embody the steriotype that white people can't dance, like my sister kept sensing me tiktoks of the whole "dance like a white girl" trend going lmfao look it's you and eventually I was like "sis please this trend has me feeling like being white is a disability and these mothafuckers are being ableist 😭 also I could NEVER be that on beat so yall ain't even doin it right 😭😭😭😭"). Tbh if I told one of my friends (lol what friends, i got jokes) to get into Skz and they showed up at my bday and performed the entirety of I Got It I would simply shower them in money and go "aight everyone else go home, you are no longer needed, you are being laid off, your position has been eliminated, we're downsizing, the company is moving up and you're moving out, you are not qualified for this role any longer, best of luck with future endeavors" 😊

I think part of the reason I can't deal w Twitter is the exact reason I refuse to leave tumblr, in that I've been on tumblr since 2006 and twt since 2008, and tumblr literally has not changed at all, not even a little, whereas going from the early days of twt where there were no corporate sponsorships or ads and you had to manually copy and paste someone's tweet and @ them to retweet it, to how it is now, like 90% ads and showing me shit from the timelines of people I don't even fuckin follow n whatnot, it's just not enjoyable. Idk how anyone finds anything on twt, it confuses and frustrates me because I am old and have not adapted well to technology changing 😂 But arguably, the skz fanbase doesn't want me on skztwt anyways so like it works for both of us lmfaooo. I am old and cringey, and also still think of twt as stream of consciousness whereas tumblr is your teenage bedroom where you can decorate the walls with anything that interests you. I do really love the nonsensical kpoptwt shitposts tho fhshsbdjjss like it is a very specific flavor of mental instability that I enjoy immensely 😂 OH and also I initially misread part of that and thought you were saying you actually irl do meth and I was like 😳 WHAT DO I SAY TO THAT. HOW DO I HANDLE THIS. Like how do I express like "I wasn't being judgy of people who use substances cause I've been there but I was just being insensitive 😳" And then went back and reread it and was like WHEW, IM JUST AN ILLITERATE FOOL 😂😂😂😂 ejeywhdhrhjwbfbdjshdhdhd I spent like an hour bwign like "IS THE REASON WE GET ALONG BECAUSE THEY'RE ON METH???? WHAT DO I DO WITH THIS INFORMATION??????" hrhehshe I am literally a fuckin idiot it's fine

It's not that I don't fw them, it's more like... Okay so like there is no situation in which I am going to skip a skz song if it comes on shuffle. You will not ever catch me NOT in the mood to listen to Sunshine, if God's Menu comes on we are THROWIN the meager amount of booty meat I got hither and thither, I could be in the happiest mood of my life but if Ex comes on I will stop to SOB. And I'm not like that with most music, so mx just falls into the category of "there is a time and place." Idk why but it just doesn't forcibly grab hold of my heart and ass the way skz always does. I really don't WANT my skz fixation to ever end, but I know that eventually it'll stop giving me dopamine bevause my brain is my worst fucking enemy 🙃 like my arcana fixation is to date the longest running hyperfixation I've ever had, going on almost three years, and I used to not be able to spend every single second of every day thinking about Asra, but now... I just feel nothing when I look at arcana stuff. As you can probz tell by the fact that I hardly post arcana anymore 😂 So I know that eventually all my happiness will end, it always does, I can never stay just as obsessed with something as I was for long. I CANT SHARE THE LIST BECAUSE I DONT *HAVE* TASTE YET 😭 I'm basically just compiling a list of any group someone tells me I should look into, ranked by how strong the kitty purred upon googling pics of them 😂 My mom read my ass to FILTH over txt lmfao she was like "they're not that adorable. Maybe your standard for adorableness has gone down with You Know Who still on hiatus 🤔" bfjwhdhd like MOMMAAAAA THE LIBRARY IS CLOSED 😂 she attacks me any time I even hint at stanning other groups, she is a skz purist and stans skz only, unofficial Momma Stay of All Stays keeping me in check lmfao.

I feel like skz really do follow thru on their promise that they're a safe space for stays, it's nice to see that they hold space for anyone and everyone in their fanbase and do it in a really simple and elegant way, I feel. Like they never make it seem like "okay here are the fans and here are the token weirdos that were only recognizing to make a buck off of them" the way a lot of artists make it feel like 😑 like they don't go out of their way to act like it's some revolutionary act to do the bare minimum of not shitting on certain parts of the fandom, if that makes sense. They feel very "yeah, of course we love all our stays, this is a welcoming space for literally anyone, that's how it should be, that should be normal," instead of like "Hi fans we love you 😊 and special shoutout to you ell gee bee tee folk, make sure to buy my rainbow merch after the show!!!" you know? Like, they're the friends who would never make you feel weird or different for some shit, the friends that take the attention off you if something they know ur sensitive about comes up, instead of weirdly snapping at whoever brought the unfomfy thing up which ruins the mood and makes you feel tiwce as bad, yk? They just give off this vibe that they, and the space they create with their music, is just a genuine and chill place to be and hang out and relax and bond. I feel like they'd be the friend group that is so goofy and sweet and silly and accepting and lovely and always makes you feel loved and excited to be alive 🥺 They are all good noodles 🥺🥺🥺

#felix-bi-anon #asksteppie

[fytheuntamed]

Do you have any thoughts on why the novel might be so popular among lgbt people despite (sometimes quite obviously) being written by a straight women for straight women. I think this is quite evident in for example the sex scenes

Why do I think the novel is so popular amongst LGBTQ+ people despite being written by a straight woman for straight women? Simple! It’s a good story and the characters are complex and intriguing. No piece of media is ever perfect, so it simply comes down to whether an individual feels the positive aspects of the media outweigh the negative aspects of the media. Are there problematic aspects within the novel? Of course! But that doesn’t mean the novel as a whole should be disregarded. You can consume media while still being critical of it, just like you can like a character while acknowledging that they’re not a good person. LGBTQ+ people, like everyone else, value a good story and interesting characters, so even if there are aspects of the story that we dislike, we may still stick around if we think it’s worth it! Also, I think there’s a shortage of stories like “Mo Dao Zu Shi” where you have LGBTQ+ characters whose sexuality isn’t the focus of the story. Yes, Wangxian are soulmates and very much in love, but that isn’t the whole point. You have a delightful bundle of politics, magic, familial ties, concepts of right and wrong, mystery, etc etc that also features a beautiful love story between two men. I guess my point is, LGBTQ+ people are flawed just like everyone else and sometimes we consume content even if we don’t agree with every part of it.

I’ve avoided getting involved in any discourse surrounding the various versions of MDZS because I wanted to keep this blog drama free, however I would like to take this chance to offer my own thoughts on the “problematic” aspects of the novel. Before I get into it, I just want to make three things clear: 1) I’m white, 2) I’m not mlm, I’m a lesbian, and 3) I’ve only read the second half of the novel and honestly I can’t remember too much of the specifics. The relevance of my opinion on the matter, therefore, is limited and my words should be read with this fact in mind. I would love to hear everyone’s thoughts and feelings on this matter, so do feel free to either leave a comment or reblog and add your two-cents. All I ask is that we keep it respectful so this can continue to be an enjoyable space for all fans.

I’ve been going through the untamed’s tumblr tag daily since the start of this blog in August 2019, so I’ve seen the whole spectrum of opinions on this matter. Some people feel very strongly that some of the ways in which MXTX writes particular aspects of the novel are “problematic,” some people are indifferent, and others feel that criticism of MXTX’s writing comes from a lack of knowledge of Chinese culture (particularly LGBTQ+ Chinese culture). (I remember seeing a post touching upon this last matter, but I didn’t save it, so unfortunately I can’t link it.)

I think the two most common criticisms of the novel that I have come across pertain to matters of consent and the imposing of heteronormative concepts onto Wangxian. Again, I want to stress that I haven’t read the novel in its entirety and my memory of it is foggy. Talking about consent first, some felt the scene in the novel where LWJ kisses an unexpecting blindfolded WWX was a big no no, while others thought it was a very sweet, romantic scene. (To give context for those who have only seen the drama, this scene would have been placed in episode 25 had they included it). For this matter, I’m of the belief that consent is a must. Regardless of whether WWX enjoyed the kiss, the fact stands that no one is entitled to another’s body, and this is why consent is, in my eyes, non-negotiable. For those who have no problem with this scene, I do think it is worth considering how you would feel about this scene had it involved, say, Jin Zixuan kissing a blindfolded Jiang Yanli. If that had been the case, I do think the majority of readers would have found the scene in poor taste (I could be wrong, though!). I will say that the trope of the forceful kiss is extremely common and can be found in every genre; it’s definitely not restricted to LGBTQ+ couples. For the aforementioned reason, I don’t like the forceful kiss scenario irregardless of the genders of the people involved. I do think writing such scenes for LGBTQ+ couples in particular can perpetuate harmful stereotypes, particularly that LGBTQ+ people have no respect for personal boundaries and can’t control their physical desires. I think the situation is doubly bad if the person who is being kissed is “not yet gay,” because again, it perpetuates the idea of the big bad gay person and the innocent “straight” person who is at the whims of said big bad gay.

Moving on to WWX and LWJ’s sex life, I have seen multiple people in the tag mentioning WWX having a “rape kink” and their discomfort with this fact. Logically, I understand that we are all allowed, as human beings with different tastes and preferences, to enjoy the things that bring us pleasure (excluding certain obvious things). That being said, I do not personally enjoy rape fantasies in my media and try to stay far away from it. As I mentioned, we are all welcome to our own tastes and preferences, but I do think it is important that we realize that we are all also the product of our environments. Things, including kinks, do not exist in vacuums, and therefore they must arise as a result of some mixture of external and internal forces. Does MXTX giving WWX a rape kink automatically make her demon spawn? Not really. Does MXTX giving WWX a rape kink add anything to his character or the story? Also not really. All this being said, I do think LGBTQ+ media is oversaturated with consent issues and I’d personally like to see this come to an end, because once again, it perpetuates harmful stereotypes that do have a real impact on LGBTQ+ individuals.

As for the imposing of heteronormative concepts onto Wangxian, I think the biggest complaint I’ve seen is about WWX being referred to as the “mom” or the “wife” within the Wangxian couple. I would like to state here that this may be a situation in which cultural differences come into play. Additionally, because the novel is not originally written in English, it may be a case of telephone in which the true meaning becomes distorted as it is translated from one language to another and then to another and so on and so forth. Therefore, I am going to proceed with my thoughts on the matter in a more generalized way. For me, this is a big pet peeve of mine, to the point where I will not reblog content that refers to any of the male characters as “mom” or “wife.” My reasoning is simple: WWX is a man, so he would be someone’s “dad” or “husband,” not their “mom” or “wife.” I know from first-hand experience that non-LGBTQ+ people will often try to place a gay couple within a heterosexual context to make it easier for them to process how two women or two men could be together. I understand the reasoning behind this way of thinking, but that does not mean this way of thinking should be encouraged. It’s bad enough that non-LGBTQ+ couples are ensnared in an endless maze of gendered ways of being and thinking - let’s not force that on LGBTQ+ couples as well. My other issue is that the words “mom” and “wife” not only have gendered connotations, but they have implicit sexual connotations as well. In this context, “mom” and “wife” are just another way of saying “bottom.” Just think about it; nobody’s out there calling LWJ “mom” or “wife.” The whole idea of “top” and “bottom” in gay media is so……..it’s almost like an obsession? And for those of you who may be thinking it’s not that deep and has no bearing on real life….I really wish that were true. Go look at the comments section of any gay couple’s youtube video and you will invariably find someone asking who is the top and who is the bottom. That’s invasive as fuck, y’all, and you don’t see that shit on straight couple’s videos (again, because the assumption is that women are always in the submissive, therefore there’s no need to ask because it’s assumed the answer will always be that the woman “bottoms” and the man “tops”). All this being said, I can only speak about this matter from my viewpoint as a lesbian. If one day I were to get married, I wouldn’t want people referring to my wife as my “husband,” because the whole point is that we’re both the wife! I know there isn’t one rule/mindset that applies to all gay people, so I would love to hear others’ feelings on this matter.

Finally, I would also like to briefly touch upon Mo Xuanyu, who we don’t really get to see in the drama. I don’t know whether LWJ or WWX ever explicitly state their sexualities or which gender(s) they’re attracted to, but I’m pretty sure Mo Xuanyu is explicitly stated to be strictly into men (please correct me if I’m wrong!). I do wonder what MXTX’s intentions were (if there were any) when she decided to make Mo Xuanyu gay, because what I’ve grasped of his characterization is that he is written similarly to other gay male characters that give the impression they were created by checking off a list of every popular stereotype about gay men. I guess I’m just curious, as someone who knows very little about Mo Xuanyu, how others felt about his character in terms of complexity and stereotypes.

If you took the time to read all this, thank you! Let me know your thoughts~

#the untamed #mo dao zu shi #cql #mo xiang tong xiu #mxtx #long post #sorry this took me a while to respond to anon #i was away from home and also i knew it would end up being long so i wanted to have the time to properly answer you #ask #anon #Anonymous

[lovely-van2]

darling - van mccann (part one)

God, he was so fucking annoying. 

part two!

warnings: language, smut, a little mary jane use

word count: 4k+

notes: ok this is my second fic, probably a little funnier/less deep than the last one lol. but i am taking requests!!! i need inspiration and quarantine gives me plenty of time to write so plz plz send any in that you have. otherwise enjoy :)

“He’s disgusting.”

You rolled your eyes, watching as Van McCann leaned in and whispered in the ear of some innocent, doe-eyed girl, his hand stroking up and down her leg, her giving him that bashful smile like they always did. You took another sip of your drink as she giggled, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear. 

“Maybe so but you gotta respect his game,” Jack replied.

“Yeah,” you scoffed. “I respect him so much.” You shook your head as you watched Van and the poor girl stand up, his hand on her lower back, smirk on his face as he guided her out of the bar, surely finding a way to get into her bed only to never call her again. 

Van wasn’t really your friend at all. You were introduced to him through Jack, one of your best mates since you were young and now roommate. Before you met him, Jack talked Van up so much you thought surely you’d fall in love with him as soon as he spoke. 

But you didn’t. To you, Van was arrogant, rude, and just plain annoying. He was famous and good looking and he milked it for all its worth. You couldn’t even begin to understand why Jack and his friends liked Van so much but because they were your friends too, you had to deal with him. He was generally way too cheery for you, always rambling on about how great his life was. You figured the boys were all jealous of him, his fame and the way women worshipped him. You found it nauseating. 

Jack laughed, finishing up his beer and setting the empty glass on the bar counter. “Wanna head out?” 

The next morning, you woke up to the sound of obnoxious laughter and what could only be defined as male noise. You groaned, shoving your face into your pillow. God, they’re so loud. 

“Good morning, sleeping beauty,” Jack said, giving you a smile as you headed straight for the coffee pot. It was after noon already but you were annoyed from being woken up not on your own terms and your head hurt from the wine you had drank the night before. 

“Not good morning. You’re all fucking loud,” you said, filling up your mug. In the living room you saw one of Jack’s other good friends, Larry, who you actually liked quite a bit. And Van, of course. You rolled your eyes to yourself. 

“Relax, darlin’. That time of the month or what?” Van called from the living room, eyes focused on whatever video game they were all obsessed with at the moment and a joint dangling from his mouth. 

“Fuck off,” you muttered. He called you ‘darling’ only because he knew you hated it and found it condescending - which he thought was hilarious. 

You stepped into the living room, glaring at him. “If you’re gonna be a dick, will you at least share?” you asked, pointing at the joint. 

He laughed, taking a long hit. “No fucking way. Get your own goddamn weed.”

Jack plopped down on the couch next to Van. “Mate, I paid for that. Be nice and share, would ya?” Jack usually did his best to be the mediator between you and Van. 

Van rolled his eyes, passing it to you. You took a hit, finishing it off and tossing it out. Jack lit up another one so you cracked the windows. 

“So how was that girl last night?” Larry asked, not taking his eyes off the TV screen as he angrily pushed some buttons on the controller.

“I’m telling you, this chick had the biggest tits I’ve ever seen. And I’m not even a tits guy but they were fuckin’ nice. She was real skinny, too. Dead sexy,” Van said as you made yourself comfortable on the loveseat, stretching out. 

“Could you be any more offensive?” you scoffed.

“Could you be any more jealous?” he mocked. “Y’know, you’re so irritating no guy would even want to fuck you. You’d never shut your goddamn mouth.” 

You rolled your eyes yet again, ignoring him and scrolling through your phone instead. You had a few long, dramatic texts from Leo, the guy you were sort of seeing. He was very nice and sweet, maybe even to a fault. His sappy good morning texts had good intentions but usually made you cringe a little. 

“I think Leo’s gonna come over in a bit,” you said to Jack who nodded. 

“Okay, sounds good,” he replied. 

Van snorted. “That guy’s a fuckin’ prick.” He stood up, going into the kitchen and searching through your fridge, another of his most annoying habits. He always took your food without asking. 

“Why are you here again?” you muttered, shooting him a glare. 

And this was how it usually went when Van was back home. He was constantly at your’s and Jack’s house for some reason, as if he lived to antagonize you. He would leech off your food, alcohol, and weed and bug the shit out of you while he did it. You’d go out with the boys and watch as he wrapped some girl around his finger, giving her that irritating smirk and winning her over too easily. For the most part, you tried to not let Van bother you because you knew that it was important to Jack that you and Van could at least remain civil. But God, he was so fucking annoying. 

--- 

Jack’s birthday was coming up and you had big plans to throw a surprise party for him. Unfortunately, this meant you had to work with Van to coordinate everything. He and Larry had agreed to help but so far, Van hadn’t contributed at all. 

“Okay, so I’ll get the drinks, yeah? Beer, vodka, everything like that,” Larry said. It was a few days before the party so you were trying to get everything smoothed out. You, Larry, and Van were at a pub for the afternoon, trying to avoid Jack as best you could. 

“Yeah, perfect. Our neighbor has a big stereo system he’s letting us borrow which is nice. I’ve started making the playlist already, so we’re good there.”

Van scoffed. “We’re not gonna be playing your shitty music all night. No fuckin’ way,” he said, sipping his beer. 

You narrowed your eyes at him. “First of all, my taste in music is great. Second of all, why don’t you do it then? It’s not like you’re doing anything else to help.”

“Fine with me,” Van shrugged. 

You continued to discuss plans for decorations with Larry and how you were going to set everything up until Van interrupted you. “Be right back,” he mumbled, sliding out of the booth you were in. You watched as he made his way over to the bar where a girl was sitting alone, probably waiting for someone. 

“Oh, come on.” Larry laughed as you watched Van chat the girl up, leaning against the bar. 

He came back within a few minutes, a little piece of paper in between his fingers. “Too easy,” he said with a smirk. Larry’s mouth was hung open wide, clearly impressed, which only added to Van’s ego. 

“Don’t encourage him,” you muttered, going back to the list in your phone of people you planned to invite.

“Do ya always have to be so bitter? Jesus,” Van said with a chuckle. 

“I’m not bitter, I just don’t think it’s that impressive that you went and got some random girl’s number. It’s not that hard.” 

Van raised his eyebrows at you, stretching his arm out across the back of the booth. “Oh really? Then you do it.”

You rolled your eyes. “That’s dumb.” 

Van shrugged. “If it’s so easy, then do it. I bet you can’t get...” he scanned the bar for a moment, “his number,” he said, tilting his head in the direction of a decently attractive guy who was sitting with one other guy at the bar. 

“Van, I’m not gonna do that. I don’t need to prove anything to you.” 

Van snorted. “Mhm, sure. Or it’s because you have no game, darlin’.” 

“Fine,” you said, rising out of the booth. You glared back at him as you walked up towards the bar. You tapped the guy’s shoulder. 

After a few minutes, you made your way back to your table, avoiding eye contact with Van.

“Aw, how sad,” he said, bottom lip sticking out in a fake pouty look. “Not that easy is it? Told ya.”

You scoffed. “That was nothing,” you said, pulling out your phone and showing you the new contact that the guy had made for himself. 

“Damn, you’re good,” Larry said with a whistle. “That took you like two minutes.”

“And that’s how it’s done,” you said, leaning back in the booth. 

“Yeah, whatever,” Van mumbled. 

---

“Van, do you wanna try, I don’t know, helping?” you hissed as you hung up streamers. He was standing in front of the window, smoking and scrolling through his phone leisurely. Larry was out buying mixers for drinks and Van had done absolutely nothing. 

He sighed dramatically. “Christ, you’re annoying.”

“Oh I’m annoying?” you retorted. “Have you met yourself?” 

You and Van continued to bicker as he eventually started helping you, setting up the stereo system and speakers. He did as he was told for the most part, occasionally firing something back at you, muttering under his breath. 

By nine o’clock, the house was full of people. Jack was going to arrive home any minute from work so you had turned the lights off and were all hiding. 

“Surprise!” Everyone yelled as he opened the door. He looked truly shocked, his mouth in a big smile, eyes wide. 

“Oh my God, what?” he said with a laugh. 

“Happy birthday,” you said with a grin. 

Jack pointed at you. “You did this?”

“Don’t let her take all the credit, mate,” Van said, slinging an arm around Jack’s shoulder. 

Soon the party actually started, the music loud, drinks flowing. Within an hour, you could tell people seemed to be having a lot of fun. The house was pretty crowded, the sticky floor and clouds of smoke already apparent. 

You were making yourself a drink in the kitchen when Jack saw you. “Hey,” he said, nudging your arm with his elbow. “Thanks for doing this, by the way.”

“Oh yeah, of course. You deserve it,” you said, smiling at him. 

“Did Van and Larry actually help?” he laughed. 

“Larry did, yeah. Van actually did a good job helping me set things up today, too.” 

“Wow, probably the first time I’ve heard you say anything remotely positive about him,” Jack commented with a smirk.

You raised an eyebrow. “What’s that look for?”

Jack shrugged. “Nothing, nothing. I just think you guys have a lot of… tension.”

“Yeah, we do because he’s annoying as hell,” you muttered. “I don’t know how you can even be friends with him.”

“I was thinking more like sexual tension,” Jack replied, taking a sip of his drink. “You know how people always say that little boys are mean to the girls they like? Just something to think about.” He patted you on the shoulder. “Anyway, see ya later.”

Sexual tension with Van? Yeah, right. You weren’t blind - you knew he was attractive. Even though you liked to pretend he wasn’t. But his personality was so unattractive to you that it completely overshadowed his looks. And him ‘liking’ you? There was no way. He was a complete dick to you. 

The party went on. You chatted with friends you hadn’t seen in a while and danced a bit, smoking a little here and there. By midnight, you were positively drunk. You swayed a little as you stood and talked to Larry in the living room. 

“Yeah, Van was telling me about this song-” Larry was saying to some guy you didn’t recognize.

“Van,” you scoffed, crossing your arms, drink in hand. 

Larry glanced at you, eyebrows raised, a little smile playing on his lips. “What?” 

“He’s the worst. Barely even fucking helped us with this party. Van might be the most annoying person I’ve ever met,” you said matter-of-factly. 

“Darlin’, why don’t you keep my name out your mouth?” You turned to see Van, hand wrapped around a beer and a smirk on his face.

You narrowed your eyes at him. “Don’t call me that.” 

“Why not, darlin’? It’s cute, innit?” 

“It’s patronizing, Van. Sorry, is that too big a word for you? Not like you ever even graduated high school.” 

His smile faltered slightly. “Alright, don’t go there,” he muttered. You knew this was probably the one area he was insecure about, even though he tried to act like he didn’t care. 

“Well, am I wrong? Imagine dropping out of high school. How embarrassing,” you said with a laugh. 

Van scoffed. “Fuck off,” he said, pushing past you. You followed as he walked through the house to the back door and outside. 

“Aw, poor Van. Did I strike a nerve?” you said mockingly, leaning against the house. You could feel the vibrations from the music but it was a lot quieter outside. 

Van was trying to light a cigarette but his lighter didn’t seem to be working. “You don’t know shit about me, y’know,” he said. “Christ, come on,” he mumbled at his lighter. 

“I do, actually. I know all about how you just stopped showing up probably because you thought you were too good for high school. But now you’re just a big rockstar so who cares? Except your band is shit anyway,” you said, sipping your drink. “I don’t know why these girls fall at your feet. You’re so goddamn annoying and not nearly attractive enough to be getting most of them.”

Van was still trying to light his cigarette. “Fuck.” You watched as he paced a little, kicking dirt up off the ground and flicking his lighter. “You really are just jealous, aren’t you? Probably ‘cause you just have that pussy of a boyfriend.”

“Jealous that you get to sleep around with different girls every night? Gross. No thanks. And he’s not my boyfriend. He’s too… clingy. Not that it should matter to you.”

“Never said it did. But y’know, maybe you’re just jealous because you’re not one of those girls.” 

You scoffed. “Yeah, right, Van. Like I’d ever want to sleep with you. You’re revolting.” You looked up at him, a little smirk on his face now. He stepped towards you, taking the unlit cigarette out of his mouth.

“Oh my God,” he said with a laugh. “You do.”

“I’d rather die.” He stepped closer, only a few feet away from you. 

“Really?” he murmured. 

“Mhm. I don’t know what girls see in you. You’re the most infuriating, frustrating person I’ve ever met.”

“Am I?” He was now inches away from you, the scent of his cologne noticeable. 

“Yes,” you whispered, swallowing. He towered over you, leaning one arm against the wall behind you. 

You sucked in a breath. He was so close you could see the little scattering of freckles across his nose you didn’t realize he had and wow, his eyelashes were unbelievably long. 

“You drive me absolutely insane,” he muttered. And then he pressed his lips against yours. Your eyes fluttered shut and you kissed him back after a moment. He brought his hands down to your hips, pressing you against the side of the house. Your fingers tangled in his hair, his tongue tasting like vodka and smoke. He was so tall you had to stand up on your toes a little, tilting your head up as high as you could. He bit your bottom lip ever so slightly and pulled away, kissing your jaw and then down your neck, licking and nipping at your skin.

“Fuck, Van,” you moaned quietly. Shit. 

Van chuckled against your neck. “Always wondered what it would sound like to hear you moan my name.” 

After a moment, he pulled back and looked you in the eyes before kissing you one more time, agonizingly slow. 

And then he gave you a smirk and went inside without another word. 

Jesus. Had you just imagined that whole thing? You brought your fingers up to your lips, feeling them as if you couldn’t believe what they had been doing moments earlier. 

“What the fuck?” you whispered to yourself. 

---

Within a few days of the party, Van was gone. Jack told you he was going on a short tour to play some festivals or something and you were really thankful.

The few times you saw him before he left, things just felt strange. You completely avoided being alone with him. You still gave each other shit and bickered a lot but you couldn’t look at him without thinking of what his lips felt like. It was very annoying and it was even more annoying that now you were seeing him so differently. You realized that he actually was kind of funny and you could tolerate being in the same room as him for longer than a few minutes, which just confused you. Had he always been like this and you just painted him to be a dick? Or was something different? 

You were thankful when he finally left. 

“How are ya, mate?” you overhead Jack say from his bedroom one day as you came out of the bathroom. You paused, realizing he was on the phone.

“Good, yeah. These shows are absolutely insane, just mad.” It was Van, of course. You peeked your head in Jack’s room casually. 

“Hey, I was thinking we should get - oh my bad,” you said, as if you didn’t realize you were interrupting. Jack was lying on his bed with his phone in hand, smiling at it.

“Nah it’s okay, I’m just Facetiming Van. Come here,” he said, patting the spot next to him in bed. 

You climbed in next to Jack, peeking your head in the frame. You saw Van for the first time in nearly a month and swallowed. He was lying down on a couch and smoking a cigarette, bags noticeable under his eyes. The quality was shitty but damn, he did look good. 

“Hey, darlin’,” he said with a small smirk. 

“Hi, Van,” you muttered. Maybe darling wasn’t all that bad?

You sat and listened as Van described what touring was like, explaining how he hadn’t gotten proper sleep in weeks but he didn’t mind. He looked so happy despite his obvious exhaustion. He would always start talking really fast when he got excited about something and you couldn’t help but find it kind of endearing. Ugh.

“I miss the lads,” Jack sighed after hanging up. You did feel kind of bad for him. Van and Larry were probably his other two best friends and he always got kind of down when they were off doing band stuff. 

“Yeah, I know. It sucks,” you said. “But at least you still have me.”

Jack laughed, wrapping his arm around your shoulders in a hug. “Yeah, thank God.”

A few weeks later, you were cleaning your room, dancing along to some music. 

“I love you but I need another year alone,” you sang as you folded your laundry. 

“Singing my songs now, are ya?” You screamed, dropping the shirt in your hand as you looked up. You quickly turned the music off. Van was leaning against your door frame, hands in his pockets and a smirk on his face. 

“Jesus, you scared me. It’s on shuffle so it just came on-”

“It’s okay, darlin’. You can admit that my music is good now.”

You rolled your eyes. “Your music is okay. You just get back?”

Van nodded, glancing down the hallway. “Yeah, last night. Is Jack here?”

“No, he’s at work.” You went back to your clothes, grabbing some sweaters to put away. 

“Oh, okay. Guess I’ll wait here for him.” 

You raised an eyebrow at Van who was watching you from the doorway. “He probably won’t be back for a couple hours.” 

Van shrugged. “I’ll just have to bug ya until he gets home. Unless you want me to leave you alone.” Van walked into your room, shutting the door behind him. He leaned against it for a moment as if he was waiting for you to object. When you didn’t, he stepped forward and started looking around at the different things you’d filled your room with over the years. 

He ran his fingers across your records, squinting at them. “Looking at my shitty music?” you asked, plopping down on your bed. 

“Y’know, I hate to say it but you’ve got some decent stuff here. Oh, this album is class,” he said. 

“Yeah, it is,” you replied, “I love The Stone Roses.” You had no idea what to do with yourself. This was the first time you’d been alone with Van since the party so you were feeling a little nervous. Or a lot nervous. It didn’t help that his hair had grown quite a bit since you last saw him, curling up at the ends - something you always found very attractive. And he had a little bit of stubble that you weren’t used to-

“Mind if I put it on?”

“Uh, no, go for it.” You watched as he fiddled with your record player until he got it to work, the first song playing quietly. He turned it up a little and nodded his head along to the music. He continued to look over all your stuff, mostly the many pictures on your walls.

“Wow, that fringe you had was awful,” he said with a chuckle. 

“Yeah, I know,” you laughed, leaning forward and digging through your desk drawer. “Wanna smoke?”

Van glanced back at you as you pulled out a little bag and some joint papers. “Yeah, sure.” He sat down next to you on your bed, watching as you rolled. You tried to ignore the smell of his cologne and the thoughts that invaded your head. 

You lit the joint and inhaled a few times before passing it to him. You couldn’t help but stare at the way his lips wrapped around it as he took a couple long hits and exhaled, then took another before handing it back. 

“So your tour was good, then?” you asked. 

Van snorted as he took the joint back from you. “Wow, making small talk now are we?”

“My bad for making conversation. Y’know, if you’re gonna be a dick, Van, you can wait in the living-”

“Christ, I’m kidding, darlin’. Just not used to you wanting to talk to me.” 

“What makes you think I want to talk to you?” you muttered, flicking some ash into the tray on your nightstand. 

Van chuckled, leaning back on the bed. “Dunno, just think you do. You offered to share your weed with me, which you never do.”

You tried not to look at his thighs as he stretched his legs out, making himself comfortable. “Yeah, ‘cause you always steal it.”

“Think I disagree with you there.”

After a few minutes, you leaned back on the bed, listening to Van as he rambled on about something Larry did at one of the shows. The weed was hitting you so you were a little more relaxed. You leaned back on the pillow, laughing at whatever Van was talking about. His voice was scratchy, probably worn out from singing night after night. You closed your eyes, arms crossed behind your head, starting to focus on the music more than what Van was saying, his voice fading out. 

“I don't have to sell my soul, he's already in me,” you hummed along to the music.

“Darlin’.” You opened your eyes and saw Van leaning over you. He was only a few inches away, his eyes glazed over, red around the edges. 

“What?” you whispered. 

“Thought about ya while I was gone, y’know.”

You blinked a few times. “Really?” He nodded, the corners of his mouth lifting. “Why? I mean I figured we were just gonna pretend that whole thing didn’t happen which would’ve been fine by me because if Jack or any of the boys found out, they’d give us so much shit and it was really just a big mistake anyway so-”

You were cut off when Van put his finger to your lips. “You never shut up, do you?” he whispered, gently rubbing his thumb across your bottom lip, shifting so he was almost completely on top of you. You couldn’t help but notice how warm he was, the scent of his cologne nearly overwhelming. Your breath hitched in your throat for a moment. 

“Some would say that,” you mumbled. 

He chuckled, tracing his thumb across your cheek, tucking some hair behind your ear. “It’s cute.”

You fake gasped. “Van McCann, calling me cute? Did I hear that right?”

Van rolled his eyes. “You’re somethin’ else. But yeah, thought about you quite a bit while I was gone. I think... I think I like you, darlin’.” 

You bit your lip. “You like me? I thought you hated me.”

He laughed softly. “You know I don’t hate you. Yeah, you annoy the shit out of me but it’s kinda fun to see how worked up I can get you. I always did have a thing for you y’know, you being dead smart and all. You’re not bad to look at, either.”

Your heart was pounding so fast you were scared he was going to notice it against his own chest. You could feel every inch of his body that was touching yours, his breath across your lips, the buckle of his jeans in between your legs. It was driving you insane. 

You swallowed, licking your lips. “Okay, so maybe I have a little crush on you, too. I don’t have a fucking clue how it happened and I wish that I didn’t but Jack’s probably gonna be home soon and do you even know what he would do if he walked in on us like this-”

Van cut you off again, this time with his lips. He kissed you slowly and lazily, his tongue moving against yours with no urgency. Your eyes closed after a moment, reaching your arms around his neck and kissing him back. Your lips parted, gasping slightly as he ran his hand up and down your body, his fingers gently moving your sweater up just enough to touch your bare skin, eliciting a shiver from you. 

Van smiled against your lips at your reaction, already reeling off of what he could do to you with just a touch. He moved his hand under your sweater, pausing for a moment when he realized you weren’t wearing a bra, then continued to travel his fingers over your skin, ghosting over your breasts. He pulled away after a moment and you sighed at the loss of contact, opening your eyes to look at him. He scooted down, staring back at you through those long eyelashes as he pushed your sweater up, exposing your skin. “Up,” he mumbled. You leaned forward so he could tug it off, throwing it on the ground. 

His lips immediately attached to your neck, kissing down your skin ever so slowly, his mouth going to your nipples. You ran your fingers through his hair, tugging on it gently. Your legs squeezed together involuntarily and you hoped he wouldn’t notice. 

But of course, he did. He smirked at you, not breaking eye contact as he moved down the bed, his fingers going to your zipper. He paused and raised his eyebrows. You nodded, lip pulled in between your teeth. He carefully unzipped your jeans and slipped them off of you, tossing them to the side. He kissed the inside of your thighs slowly, then up your leg, goosebumps rising up on your skin. He traced his finger over the bow on your underwear.

“Cute.” 

You squirmed as his fingers ghosted over your underwear. He was so calm, his movements so easy and carefree. You on the other hand, had a million thoughts running through your brain but you tried to push them away as Van moved your underwear to the side. You watched, eyes wide as he ran his calloused fingers over your skin, teasing you. 

“Van,” you whined. 

He smirked up at you. He pulled your underwear off carefully, taking his time to run his hands down your legs and then leaned forward, meeting you with his tongue. You sighed at the contact, fingers raking through his hair, your eyes fluttering shut. Jesus, he’s good at this.

By the time he slid a finger into you, then two, you were a mess underneath him. “Fuck, Van,” you moaned, biting your finger to try to stop yourself. “Damn it.”

He chuckled, curling his fingers inside you, the wetness of his tongue making you shiver. 

“You like that?” he mumbled against your skin. 

The slight scratch of his stubble inside your thighs was driving you insane and you didn’t know if it was the weed or if it was because it was Van, but within a few minutes you were trembling under his touch. 

“I’m-” you couldn’t even finish your sentence as you came, pulling hard on his hair. Your eyes nearly rolled back in your head as you moaned his name, not caring one bit this time. Van kept going, tongue flicking over you and you had to pull him away, your legs shaking. 

“Holy fuck,” you panted, blinking a few times to make sure you could see straight. Van looked way too pleased with himself before he leaned in and kissed you gently. He ran his hand up the curve of your body, bringing his thumb to stroke across your flushed cheek. You kissed him back eagerly, your hands just slipping under the hem of his shirt when you heard a knock on your door. 

“Hey, you home?” You and Van froze, pulling away from each other and staring at the door in horror. 

“Oh, shit.”

#vanfic #catb fanfic #van mccann #van mccann fanfic #catfish and the bottlemen fanfiction #van mccann fanfiction #catb #my fic #van x reader #vanfiction

[wormmomma]

Voice training: a socially acceptable form of antifeminism

voice training is essential as a transgender woman. its the hidden and important staple of trans womanhood. regardless of all the hormones we take or the surgeries we use to bend and break ourselves into trans womanhood the most innaccessible thing to the trans woman is the voice. trans women unlike trans men dont run a different octive due to hormones. our voices dont magically run at a higher octive jut because we the LOOK like they should, on the contrary our voices stay the same. so in comes voice training. the practice of training ones voice should be completly innocuous but unfortunatly it isnt. in my experience it feels physically uncomfotable, racist, and the staple of antifeminist trans medcalist ideology. 

i tried voice trainging but because im lazy, broke and love myself i quit. alot of paid vocie training seminars are run by white cisgender women and unpaid are run by white trans women who ultimately (in my own opinion) sound ridiculous. in the herculaean task of the ultimate femme voice white trans women reach this ridiculous femme affect that stays inside the high pitch valley girl female octive. the voices are very femme, womanly but also high pitch, shrill and ridiculous. i guess ill be the first to say it because im a black trans woman. honestly unless janet mocke, most of the cast of pose, rico nasty (i like her voice alot) or kat blaque run a voice training course im really disinterested in the concept aas a whole. the spectrum of youtube videos on voice training range from white women who have trained and broken there vocal cords into oblivion saying “you can somehow do the same without hurting yourself in a few easy steps to something somehow much worse. the other catgortiy is profeeesional voice trainers who are white to clinical cishet and ultimately realllllyyyy uninteresting. finally in the darkest part of the internet is antifeminst trans medicalist mostly using the practice to expresss there idea of TRUE WOMANHOODD, this malformed homunculous of the respectible housewife mixed with a dash of the quiet rich cool girlfriend. the straight woman all the boys love with the bubbly white valley girl voice who barely speaks unless spoken too. it was so bad i got kinda scared but because my partner was a very (unfortunatley) straight trans wiman i fell on deaf ears. i feel like the trans voice training had no space for black women. especially the more unconventional ones like myself who are more bookish suburban and are ulitmatly more alternative and less binary in ther gender presentation. the concept of voice training makes me sad as a angry riotgrrl feminist. i wanna feel free to use my voice and sing and spak the way i always have. fuck everyone else im a woman so its feminine. thats it. its the hairy armpits are femme now because i say it is of voices. which sounds nasty but thats a good summation of how i feel. im sick of trans women being to afreaid to do videos, podcasts, hell even porn without voice training. stop breaking your vocal cords and be happy with what you have its a social dysphoria that forces us to literally break our vocal cords. i dont feel uncomfortable with my voice everyone else does. the writiers room of south park and snl hate my trans femme voice not me. i love my voice and mydelf and my trans feminisity. so since im a black woman a singer and lazy im not voice training, but hey have fun yall live in that truth all im saying is that voice trianing is not my truth.

#voice training #male to female #ftm #black trans woman #opinion #editorial #article

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Psycho Analysis: Hol Horse

(WARNING! This analysis contains SPOILERS!)

So last year I thought it was a good idea to try and review all of the enemy Stand users in Stardust Crusaders in a totally random order. The results were… mixed. Some of them I think came out okay, but others? Not so much. One of them was just an entire backhanded attack against some guy who decided to say “No one likes your analyses” because I think ProJared was a creep. It was, quite frankly, a mess, and I never bothered to revisit it and never thought I would, even though I still hadn’t covered the glorious, wonderful human being who is Hol Horse.

Well, now, after playing Heritage for the Future and All-Star Battle as well as just becoming a bit more knowledgeable on JJBA, I’ve decided to not only give Hol Horse his dues, but also at least briefly go back over or cover the other Stand users and give them a rating or an updated rating, as the case may be. So buckle in, this is gonna be a long one, and it’s all gonna start with everyone’s favorite incompetent henchman.

Hol Horse is probably one of the most amazing characters Araki has ever created. Hol Horse is in possession of a powerful Stand, The Emperor, which is literally a magical gun that fires bullets he can control the trajectory of. By all accounts, Hol Horse should be the single most dangerous foe that the Crusaders face, more than even Vanilla Ice. This guy should be able to shoot them all dead without a second thought! There’s just one tiny little caveat:

Hol Horse is a fucking moron.

This man is cowardly, incompetent, and just the punching bag of cruel misfortune as all his plans constantly go awry and he is constantly knocked on his ass. And yet, Hol Horse is still the most beloved enemy Stand User of Stardust Crusaders, and it’s not hard to see why. Because despite all of his bumbling, Hol Horse just oozes a sort of cool you just don’t see every day.

(For best results, listen to this the whole time while reading the following).

Motivation/Goals: Hol Horse is one of the few henchmen of DIO who is motivated purely by his own greed… at least, at first. Eventually he has his ass handed to him one too many times, and he decides to try and assassinate DIO. This goes about as well as you’d expect, and Hol Horse – not just part of it, the ENTIRE Horse – is so scared out of his mind that he decides, yep, loyalty to DIO is the way to go! It doesn’t work out, but hey, he tried, right?

Performance: Imami Williams gives Hol Horse that raspy, American charm he needs in the anime adaptation. With his voice and the animation combined, we get to see our favorite smarmy sharpshooter who can’t shoot for shit shoot his shot and miss every time, and it is simply glorious.

Final Fate: Hol Horse kidnaps Boingo and forces him to work with him to finally get his revenge! With the prophetic skills of Thoth and the raw damage that can be done with Emperor, there’s no way they could lose! And yet, as is always the case with Thoth, things go horrendously awry and Hol Horse, despite having the ability to control the trajectory of his bullets, ends up shooting himself and knocking him out of part 3 for good.

Best Scene: Really, just the entirety of the episodes where he teams up with Boingo, especially when he tries holding up Polnareff. Considering what comes after and what came before it, it’s just the dose of lighthearted fun needed before you watch all of your favorite characters get brutally murdered by DIO and Vanilla Ice,. 

Best Quote: There is only one line it could be, and it’s Hol Horse’s response to Thoth’s suggestion he kick a woman in the neck: “Listen, Boingo... I am the nicest man in the world. I have girlfriends everywhere. I might lie to a woman, but I'll never hit them! It doesn't matter how ugly they are! Because I respect women!”

That’s right, everyone. Hol Horse drinks Respect Women Juice.

Final Thoughts & Score: Hol Horse is simply astounding. The character is such a colossal screwup that he shouldn’t be as good as he is… yet he is. The dude is gifted with the most incredible power imaginable, and yet somehow he is never able to do a goddamn thing with that power! You control where the bullets go, dude! How can you not hit anything?! It’s interesting how his cowardice and lack of motivation makes him a perfect representation of the inverted Emperor tarot card, but hey, tarot motifs are par for the course with the Stand users.

But there’s something charming to how pathetic Hol Horse is. He’s always plying second banana, he’s a dirty coward who turns tail and runs when things aren’t looking good for him, he never wins a single battle, he didn’t even kill the one guy it seemed like he killed… but throughout it all he still has this sort of smarmy charisma to him that makes him impossible to hate. It’s no wonder this guy has girls all over the world, because he is a world-class charmer. There’s also how Hol Horse is just a character who really, really lives by his own personal philosophy – that is to say, he always likes to be #2, never going into a fight without backup. It’s kind of refreshing to see him always stick by this, even to his own detriment; it’s hard to hate a man who’s principled to that degree. And, of course, this man respects women. Good on him.

It helps that Hol Horse’s inexplicable popularity has led to him getting his time to shine in outside media. Heritage for the Future has two versions of him, his regular form and one that partners him with Boingo, and in skilled hands his Emperor finally gets to live up to its deadly potential. And he’s no slouch in his return appearance in All-Star Battle, and what’s more impressive is in that game he is part of the base roster while Joseph and Iggy, two of the main heroes, are relegated to DLC! You heard me right: the bumbling cowboy who did not win a single fight or even come close to it and spent a lot of time shooting himself managed to beat out out two iconic heroes from the same part onto the roster! Horsey Man must be doing something right.

As this video shows, Hol Horse is one of the most influential characters in the JJBA franchise, having helped to shape the franchise going forward and helped to inspire the traits that made beloved characters like Guido Mista, Gyro Zeppeli, and Yoshikage Kira as legendary as they are. Hell, Hol Horse is just so awesome he almost got to be a protagonist, but Araki decided that Horsey was too similar to my favorite big-titty Frenchman, Polnareff. This means Hol Horse never got his time to shine as a hero, and so stayed a villain til the end… but hey, can he really be that sad if he gets a 10/10 on Psycho Analysis?

Actually, maybe he wouldn’t like that. He likes to play second fiddle to others, after all. But I guess that’s just the curse with these JoJo villains who want to not stand out; they always end up being the best and most memorable characters.

Anyway, now that we’ve got the best of the best out of the way, it’s time for...

Psycho Analysis: DIO’s Other Henchmen

I’m just gonna give my brief thoughts on these guys. Most of them are pretty one-note oneshots, but there are a few who rise above that and manage to be something else entirely. These guys were a learning experience for Araki, and his enemy Stand users of the week definitely improved with later parts, with Vento Aureo really cranking it up to 11. 

But for now, we’re stuck with these guys.

Gray Fly: I actually stand by my opinion from my original review of him; he’s nothing incredibly memorable, but he’s a solid start to the adventure and he is directly responsible for diverting the journey onto the course it ended up going on. Without him, things would have likely played out far differently. A 5/10 is still a good score for him.

Fake Captain Tenille: He actually gets bumped down to a 2/10, due to my changes in how things are scored. He’s not amusing enough to be in the “So bad it’s good” category of the other 3s, he’s just really lame and forgettable, and he still somehow manages to lose when he has the advantage. What a dweeb.

Forever: If you think the monkey boat fight is dropping in score, you’re mistaken. Forever remains at an 8/10 for being such a delightfully weird curveball that helps set the tone for the franchise to follow.

Devo: One of the weirder playable character choices from Heritage for the Future, and certainly not one I like too much; he’s also a random event that is pretty useful in All-Star Battle’s online campaign, so that’s a good mark for him. If nothing else, he gave a good showing of Polnareff’s skills when under pressure, so… yeah. I think a 5/10 is good enough.

Rubber Soul: This review I regret because I was backhandedly responding to that guy who weirdly decided to bring up my distaste for ProJared in a review of Arabia Fats and Kenny G. I do mostly stand by what I said; Rubber Soul is one of the more amusing minor foes, if only because of his ridiculous performance as Kakyoin. Still, it really sucks he was just a clone character in Heritage for the Future… put he gets points for  having the iconic cherry-licking as a taunt. 6/10 is where he remains.

J. Geil: Again, my opinion hasn’t changed: J. Geil is a mountain of wasted potential, but at the very least he makes for a good antagonist for his brief appearance and hey, he’s the one who helped bring us the beautiful hunk of man that is Hol Horse, so I’d feel bad giving him less than a 7/10.

Nena: I honestly think Nena is one of the most boring Stand users of the part, which is sad because her episode gives Joseph the spotlight. She’s just really gross and uninteresting, and you’ll likely forget her after her episode is over. 2/10.

ZZ: ZZ is not particularly great, and his design is just there to be a joke, but it’s hard to totally hate a guy who manages to roll references to Christine, Duel, and the album cover for Eliminator by his namesake into one. I think he’s more of a 4/10, but probably on the higher end there. He’s not great, but he has enough going for him to keep me from hating him.

Enya: So if I thought that J. Geil was a waste of potential, I feel this even more so for his mother Enya. Despite being hyped up as this big, intimidating right-hand woman to DIO early on, she gets one appearance where her Stand is defeated by Star Platinum pulling a power out his ass and then is unceremoniously killed by Steely Dan of all people. I will give her this: her interactions with Polnareff are absolutely hilarious. But when all you have going for is some jokes, don’t be surprised when you end up with a 6/10, which you’re pretty much only getting because even despite the mountains of wasted potential you’re really not that bad.

She do be looking hot in the OVA tho.

Steely Dan: My opinion is unchanged; he’s a solid 7/10 oneshot douchebag. Nothing more, nothing less. His level in the PS1 game seriously blows, though.

Arabia Fats: I was too hard on this guy. While I meant everything I said, and his episode is boring filler, does it really make him a bottom of the barrel all-time worst villain? No. It just makes him a crappy joke character. 2/10.

Mannish Boy: I regret not getting to this guy last time, because aside from Forever he’s probably one of the most insane Stand user of the part, seeing as he is an infant. Like, he’s just an evil baby who can kill people in their dreams. And he gets defeated by being force fed his own crap. Much like Forever, it’s fun to speculate where exactly DIO found this guy; did he just go to a nursery and start jabbing babies with the Stand arrow? Did he meet this guy at a Cairo night club? What exactly is Mannish Boy’s origin? He’s just so utterly and hilariously inexplicable. He’s definitely a 7/10; he doesn’t quite have the shock factor that Forever did before him, but let’s not pretend an evil talking baby Stand user isn’t one hell of a weird twist.

Cameo: This guy really lives up to his name; his Stand is the one that gets the most screentime, with the actual Stand user being relegated to a – you guessed it – cameo appearance at the end of the fight. Thankfully, his Stand is an enjoyable take on jerkass genies and gives a pretty sad and disturbing episode that not only features my man Polnareff, but also marks the point where Avdol returns and brings “Hell 2 U!” I think he deserves at least a 7/10, even if this is mainly for Judgment. Still, a Stand is a representation of the user’s soul, so I think it works out.

Here’s the Stand:

And here’s the man behind it:

Midler: Midler is one of the single most interesting characters from the pre-Egypt half of Stardust Crusaders, and is the point where Stand users really started to get interesting. Her Stand, High Priestess, has a really funky and unique design, and her battle serves as the final roadblock before the Crusaders arrive in Egypt. Despite never appearing onscreen, with only her unconscious body being shown at the end of the fight in a way that obscures her, she got to appear in Heritage for the Future with an awesome sexy belly dancer design and a badass moveset that makes her a really fun character to play as. Taking everything into account, I think she just barely scrapes into the bottom of the 8/10 pool, though really this is mainly for her playable appearance.

N’Doul: My opinions really haven’t changed on him. He’s still an 8/10.

Oingo & Boingo: These guys are, in a word, hilarious. In between the grueling, brutal fight with N’Doul and the later fights in the part, these guys bring some much needed levity to the proceedings. Oingo gets an entire episode where he just completely bumbles about as he attempts to impersonate Jotaro to assassinate the Crusaders, failing at every turn and only managing to blow himself up in the end. Boingo fares a little better, eventually getting roped in to Hol Horse’s scheme to get some revenge, which leads to one of the funniest episodes of the entire series as Hol Horse and Oingo hold up Polnareff. I think they collectively get an 8/10 for being two of the funniest Stand users in the part. They even get their own unique end credits in the anime (with Hol Horse joining in on the fun when he teams up with Boingo)!

Anubis: Again, my opinion is unchanged, though I must say him having technically three playable appearances in Heritage for the Future does make me have at least a little more fondness for him. Black Polnareff, Chaka, and Khan are all amusing characters to play as and all have some awesome theme music. Introducing the concept of Stands being able to exist independently of their Original user is pretty neat, as well as the idea of a Stand that can switch users like it does. 7/10 is still what I’d give it, but I think that it’s pretty telling that this is probably the “weakest” character in the Egypt arcs in terms of being a villain, and yet he’s still pretty cool.

Mariah: Completely unchanged. She still deserves an 8/10, because her episode is hilarious, her playable appearance in Heritage for the Future is a blast, and she’s just really frikkin’ hot. I’m not gonna lie, she’s probably my second favorite enemy Stand user out of the Egyptian ones. I may or may not want her to step on me.

Alessi: I’m going to be honest here: Alessi is my favorite of the Egyptian Stand users. He’s an ax crazy coward with pedophile undertones who is just an utterly demented and sick individual with a seriously intriguing Stand that de-ages its victims. It’s a damn shame he never crossed paths with Joseph and de-aged him, but when he’s just such a hilarious and hateable lunatic with an incredibly fun playable appearance in Heritage for the Future (complete with awesomely creepy theme music!) it’s hard for me to give Alessi anything less than a 9/10. Attaboy!

Daniel J. D’Arby: My opinion is honestly unchanged, but I think I’d bump him down to an 8/10.

Pet Shop: Again, unchanged really. It’s hard to give a character as busted as he is in Heritage for the Future anything less than a 9/10 any way you slice it.

Telence T. D’Arby: Opinion unchanged, 8/10. I don’t have much else to say here, besides Xander Mobus rocks.

Kenny G: See Arabia Fats above. I got irrationally mad over a dumb joke character. He’s not going above a 2/10, but he’s not worth really getting mad about.

Vanilla Ice: I still think he’s the only enemy Stand user besides Hol Horse who deserves his 10/10. My opinion of him remains unchanged, but I would like to say he’s easily one of my favorite characters to play as in All-Star Battle.

Nukesaku: Ok, he’s not an enemy Stand user, he’s just some weird vampire… zombie… thing. Still, I feel he’s at least worth briefly mentioning, if only because he’s probably the only easily-defeated joke villain Araki did from the first three parts who is particularly memorable. Wired Beck and Doobie are really not all that memorable, but Nukesaku at least elicits a few chuckles – he even gets cameos in Heritage for the Future as well as getting to be a stage hazard in All-Star Battle. For what he is, I think he deserves a 5/10.

And with all these enemies taken care of, that just leaves one more Stand user to talk about.. one whose Psycho Analysis has been sitting in my drafts for a year now...

#Psycho Analysis #Hol Horse #JoJo's Bizarre Adventure #Stardust Crusaders #Imami Williams

[backtobackbakubabe]

Baby its Cold Outside (PART 13)

Bakugo X Reader 

It’s beginning to feel a lot like Christmas! 

Words: 2122

PART 1 HERE, PART 2 HERE, PART 3 HERE PART 4 HERE PART 5 HERE , PART 6 HERE PART 7 HERE PART 8 HERE PART 9 HERE PART 10 HERE PART 11 HERE PART 12 HERE PART 13 HERE PART 14 HERE

*****************************************************************************************************

“OI dumbass! What are you doing? Let me help you with that!” 

It was Christmas eve and you were just trying to organize the presents around the tree. Your baby bump was more like a baby basketball at this point. Only a few more weeks to go before the world had a new Bakugo. You groaned as you straightened up bracing your hands on your lower back. “Thanks babe... there’s only a few more. Your mom stopped by earlier today and dropped off a bunch of stuff. Like it took both of us like five trips to the car to get all of it unloaded. I’m assuming it’s mostly baby stuff.” 

“Wouldn't surprise me if it was all baby stuff.” He helped you over to the couch. “The old hag won't shut up about the little guy.” 

He organized the last of the presents before joining you on the couch. He pulled both of your feet into his lap and started to rub them. “She loves you and she's excited about having her first grandchild. I cant tell you how many times she's given me a speech about how you are too good for me and you’re the kid she’s always wanted and I cant screw this up.” 

“Aw babe she loves you too you know. All she could do was talk about how cute you were as a baby and how exceptional you were. Said our kid was going to be amazing with my heart and the Bakugo genes. Naturally she did throw in a couple jabs about your attitude but she does love you..” 

He leaned over and put his head in your lap, “She is right though... I dont deserve you. I’m thankful every day that you saw something in me and decided to give me a chance.” 

“That is not true! Bakugo Katsuki you take that back right now! I am not too good for you! If anything you’re the one who's constantly taking care of me.” 

He snuggled further into your lap, “I love you. So much. And I cant wait to spend the rest of my life with you.” 

You giggled, “Katsuki if I didn't know better I would say that sounded like a proposal.” 

“So what if it was?” He pushed himself up and into a kneeling position on the floor in front of you. With sure hands he pulled a small red box out of his jacket pocket. “Y/n... I’ve been carrying this stupid ring around for probably six months now. It’s not that I didn't want to ask you sooner... its just you know how stubborn I can be. And for some reason I had made up my mind that I was going to propose on Christmas. I know it’s your favorite holiday and I dont know, its probably stupid but I just wanted it to be special.” He opened the box to show off the most gorgeous ring you had ever seen. 

“Y/n would you do me the honor of being my wi- Oi are you crying?” 

You had tears streaming down your face, “You try having the love of your life propose to you with the most beautiful ring ever in existence while being eight and half months pregnant full of fucking hormones on fucking Christmas eve of all fucking nights! Of course I’m fucking crying!” 

He just smiled, took the ring out of the box, and held it to your finger, “So is that a yes?” 

You wiped your tears with the hand he wasnt holding, “Yes! Of fucking course!” 

He slid the ring onto your finger before giving you a soft kiss. He cupped your damp cheeks in his hands, “Mrs. Bakugo... Has a nice ring to it.” 

You chuckled, “Damn I thought I was going to be Mrs. Zero... Is it too late to change my answer?” 

He squeezed your thigh, “I’m afraid us Bakugos don’t come with a return policy. So it looks like you’re stuck with me.” 

“OH! Yuuto will be so happy! At least once a month he asks if you’ve proposed yet. He’s always saying his quirk keeps telling him its the only logical outcome and it was making him anxious that we weren't engaged yet. Every time I would tell him no he’d just say ‘Any day now would be nice.’” 

Bakugo laughed resuming his place on the couch with arm draped around you, “Not much of a filter on that kid huh? Well I’m surprised he kept it a secret this long. I actually told him about this a month ago. He kept bugging me about it that one day I came to eat lunch with you and decided to hang out with the class the rest of the day. So eventually I told him so he’d calm down.” 

“Sounds like Yuuto. Did I tell you he took down Aizawa in his final exam? Took him all of ten minutes. I tried to tell him how awesome he was and all he had to say was, ‘I have him memorized at this point, all logical outcomes led to me passing.’ The kid spent weeks prepping by watching every video of every teacher fighting. He knew every move before it even happened. He's something else.” 

“I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again, he reminds me of Deku, except way smarter and honestly more tolerable. I love how blunt he is, even if he doesn't mean to be. He's honest and to the point and I can respect that.” 

It was obvious how much Bakugo cared for Yuuto. He worked with him every now and then when he had free time. It made your heart soar with how patient he was with him. In a way they both lacked social skills but they both strived to be better versions of themselves. Sometimes you thought Bakugo took more away from their training sessions than Yuuto did. You wouldn't be surprised if when the time comes Ground Zero got a new side kick. 

You flinched as the baby started kicking. It wasnt the first time but this time seemed to be bit harder than usual. You grabbed Katsuki's hand and placed it on your belly, “He’s kicking!” 

With his hands on your belly and his forehead on you shoulder... this was what true happiness felt like. “Babe? How would you feel about a Christmas wedding?” 

He turned to look at you, “I’d be fine with that. Would give us about a year to get everything figured out. The baby could be the ring barer, that’s be pretty fucking cute..”

“No... I mean like tomorrow. Fuck it. I dont need a fancy wedding. I just need you. We can renew our vows later if we want to, but I’m done waiting. I just want to be married.” 

He gave you a wicked smile, “Look babe I know you're desperate to lock me down but I honestly think you’ll be a little upset later down the road if we did the bare minimum. So how about we compromise? You call our parents, I’ll call our friends. Tomorrow night we’ll have a small courthouse wedding with just us, followed by a dope ass after party with all our friends and family. How does that sound?”

You threw you arms around his neck, “You are so perfect! Oh my gosh!” You pulled back, “Shit what am I going to wear? Im huge! I won't fit into any of my nice dresses! No where will be open either! It’s Christmas eve!” 

He sighed, “Okay just this once... I’ll pull the Ground Zero card. We can ask Sasha, the women who does all my hero costume alterations if she could have something put together by tomorrow morning. Let me make a call.” 

Half an hour later you were sending over a few pictures of dresses you liked to Sasha. She said not to worry and she’d have a dress ready in no time. Shit this was happening. You were really getting married tomorrow. 

*****************

You spun a few times in front of the mirror. You dont know how she did it but Sasha was really amazing. She came over a little after lunch and did last minute alterations and she somehow managed to make you look beautiful and not at all like an oversized marshmallow. 

Mina came over and helped you with your hair and makeup. She, Kirishima and you and Bakugos parents were the only ones that would be at the actual ceremony. Momo, Denki, Dylan and cementoss were over at the UA gym decorating it for the after party. You had decided that that it was big enough and secure enough that you all could have a good time without worrying about paparazzi trying to sneak in. Katsuki had gone a bit overboard with the after party invites. Claiming he wanted everyone to see you were off limits. As if they hadn't known that already. 

You felt like a total cliche with your shot gun wedding but honestly you didn't care. You were starting a family... starting a life with Katsuki. Its all you had ever wanted. So as you walked down that isle all you could do was beam your most endearing smile, and all Katsuki could do was return the gesture.

It was time for your vows. You knew Katsuki was nervous because he's not always the best with his words, or expressing his feeling for that matter but he surprised everyone in the room. “Y/n. A little over a year ago... One year, one month, and four days ago to be exact. You threw a snowball at my head. And shit are you lucky I was already so far gone over you already. That may have been the day we officially started dating but I fell in love with you years before that. I fell in love with you the day you pantsed me outside of UA with all of our future classmates watching and I’ve loved you every day since. Any girl who could be that pretty AND put up with my bullshit. Definitely a keeper. I may have had weird ways of showing it. And I’ll be the first to admit I was a dick from time to time. But you bring out the best in me and I cant imagine a life for me without you in it.” 

You stuck your lip out, “Aww Katsuki that’s so sweet. Oh shit you're going to make me cry again.” He slid the wedding ring on your finger giving your hand a quick encouraging squeeze. You have no idea where or how he got wedding rings on such short notice but you weren't going to ask. 

“Alright so I guess it’s my turn then. So we've obviously been friends for years now. But we've also been rivals for years as well. We always competed at UA in just about everything. We competed for better grades. We fought constantly, literally with our firsts just as much as we screamed at each other. Just the other day we tried to see who could fit more marshmallows in their mouth. But the only thing I've ever been better at than you was English. Which brings me to the only time you ever asked me for help... Your Oscar Wilde paper. It was in your dorm room that day that I truly fell in love with you because that was the first day I saw the kind, soft side of you that I’m so familiar with now. And like Oscar Wilde once said, ‘You dont love someone for their looks, or their clothes, or for their fancy car, but because they sing a song only you can hear.’ and baby you sing that song every day in the little things you do for me and I don't think it’ll ever get old.” 

A single tear fell down his cheek which he was very quick to catch before anyone noticed. “You may now kiss the bride.”

And just like that you shared your first kiss as husband and wife. 

Later you two were sitting at a table eating cupcakes at your after party. All of your friends dancing around you having a good time. You leaned over so he could hear you over the music, “I never knew you liked me all that time. I’m sorry it took me so long to catch up.”

He gave you a wicked smile, “I’m used to waiting on you by now. I’m just sorry you actually thought you were better at English than me... I never needed help on that Oscar Wilde paper... I just wanted an excuse to spend time with you.” 

#bakugo x reader #bakugo x y/n #bakugo #bakugo katsuki #katsuki bakugō #bakugo imagine #bhna #bhna bakugou #bhna imagine #bhna x reader #mha bakugou #mha #mha imagines #mha x reader #my hero academia

[kurtty-drabbles]

House of M au - Redone (part 2)

N/A: Let´s continue this au. I think.

@dannybagpipesarecalling @djinmer4 @tieflingteeth @muninandhugin

The Red Guard is a conception as old as Genosha itself-which is a bit ironic as Genosha is not as older as some people seem to consider- and Raven Darkholme is one of the few people that know how old Genosha truly is. Raven Darkholme is a shapeshifter and installs the idea of never asking a shapeshifter her/his age is a taboo that shouldn´t be disclosed.

Kurt Wagner Darkholme is one of few people to know sure secret and promises to take to his grave-an inside joke among son and mother-although, right now, his mind is far too focused on recent events to care for jokes.

Passing through some of his co-workers. Kurt slams the door to his mother´s office and is a pair of golden eyes look out, somehow bored at this entrance- Kurt has the mind to use his tail to close the door- and crosses his arms as he is ready to drop the bomb. "Who is Kitty Pryde?"

Raven Darkholme couldn´t be more bored with this question if she wanted. "Hi, son! how are you, son? Me? I´m fine, thanks for asking" her tone is dry as her eyes are back to the papers. You see, the Red Guards are all about action and it´s also involved in lots of paperwork.

Kurt doesn´t look too chastised at this. "I´m talking about Juggernaut´s accident...by the way, will Marko Kurt" and he looks deadpan by the fact a criminal shares the same name as him. "will be put in maximum security?"

Now, Raven shows her teeth. Is a fitting metaphor for the fearsome leader of the Red Guard. "Actually, Marko is powerless without his magic helmet...he´ll put in the common criminal cellar, along with the other common criminals" and her smile looks more devious. "As we´d inform him how his precious helmet is being melted...no more magic helmet" and Kurt arch his eyebrows at this.

"And it is?"

"Oh, Kurt...does it really matters?"

And this debate-and any moral implication- is deemed over. Well, Kurt Wagner disagrees. "mother, please" he pleads now and is unwavering sincere. "In the Juggernaut case...a woman, a civilian as far I can tell" and Kurt is showing such suspicious on his face is almost comic. Almost. "and she faces Juggernaut on her own and even had the nerve to ask for one of my swords ..." Kurt states. Raven is bored again.

"Kurt, if I were to give a fuck to every lady you meet that do anything to jump into your bed...I would be like this" and her face twist to an old crone with white hair and bad teeth. Kurt is not amused. "So, I do not see the big picture only you see"

"She stands Juggernaut...how many people can do that and be still alive?" and Kurt grins as Raven is no longer bored. "My point is, what if she´s from the Project X?" and now Raven is giving him her sole attention.

"Kurt, we dismantled that program way before you were even born. Way before Rogue was even born..." Raven commence. "Logan James Howlett is one of the last candidates...and he´s spending his life as a rich playboy...if, and I want to be clear here on the if, IF this woman is from the project X...why she would content herself in being a history teacher?" and Raven feels she struck a nerve on Kurt.

"Look, I´d not know. OK? Logan is a special case on its own. Maybe she wanted to have some normalcy...my point is: I need your permission to access the big data. I need to know more about this woman, if she´s part of the program X...we need to know...what if she gets some power up? Laura suffered that and if we´re not there...things would have turned grimly for everyone" Kurt concludes somewhat smugly. His reason has some base.

Raven rests her face on the palms of her hands. "Denial!" and it shocks her son´s to the very core. "I´ll not authorize privacy invasion for a flimsy excuse, yes, she may be from the program X, but, let´s be honest...there like 1% or less of a chance of being true...son, hear me out" now Raven is pleading. As a mother. Never as a leader. "the program was closed years ago. This Kitty Pryde is not from the Program X...but, if you feel there´s something wrong about her...you don´t need to use our data" she stops and looks at her only son.

"You´re Kurt Wagner" she starts in a sing-song tone. And Kurt starts to use the name Mom as a warning. "The heartthrob of Genosha...what lady would refuse such the Amazing Nightcrawler!" and she has a wide grin on her face and Kurt is completely bemused.

"Thanks, that´s useless"

"Anytime, son"

_______________________________________________________________________________________

The Sunshine School is not one of the elite- even if the name gives this impression- and it includes many professionals that are doing their best for the future generation of Genosha. There´re a majority of mutant teachers- a rule Magneto created in his first year and is hard to ignore it- however, there´re some humans working in the school as well.

Right now, Jono Starmore is teaching the kids about telepathy. Of course, as the man is mute. His entire class is in silence- if one is to look from outside, it sure paints an odd picture- as the teaching carries on.

Jubilation Lee is watching the class- Telepathy 101- from afar and is not thinking the scene is too strange. She watches as Jono being still and showing little changes in his expression and makes the mistake of making a soft sigh. A mistake the other teachers caught on pretty quick.

"Oh, someone is in love!" Bobby teased. And Monet-who is doing her nails- didn´t need to look up to Jubilation or Bobby to see what´s the image is being folded. "Jubilee is so obvious. Too obvious...is pathetic and adorable at the same time" and Jubilee remembers she promised to the principal she wouldn´t kill Monet- she made a promise and she is trying to uphold. She´s trying- even if the temptation is strong.

"I´m not sure what you guys are talking about...I´m just happy we have a telepath that has some morals....unlike your old buddy, Emma...how is she, Monet?" Jubilee hissed as Monet looks unimpressed.

"Still being the White Bitch we know. We love and we hate" Monet summarizes the situation in one line. "And you? Done pinning over a silent boy?"

Kitty pipes in. Her coffee is not that great, but, will keep her awake until she has time to take a nice nap. "Hey, leave her alone. If she has a crush" Jubilee vehemently denies even if she´s blushing. "let her deal with that. Teasing will not help our dear friend who is crushing someone"

"Et Tu, Kitty?"

And there´s an easy feeling among them. Bad coffee is more agreeable if you have a good company. It even helps to forget problems in the past.

Jubilee changes the subject quickly. "So, Kitty...how was facing Juggernaut?" and people forget about Jubilee´s crush-for now- as they bomb Kitty with questions.

Payback!

"Uhm...it was ok...I meet Nightcrawler...also I saw Rogue punching Juggernaut"

"Rogue?! She´s the coolest!" they all agreed. _______________________________________________________________________________________

"I mean, you saw Rogue!" Bobby is walking with Kitty as they´re responsible to clean the small festival their class made. Bobby is almost jumping like a little boy who got a present way earlier. "How is she?" and Kitty almost laughs.

"No one going to ask if I´m alright?" inquires poorly faking being angry. Kitty is not a great actress.

"Are you Kitty Pryde, right?" is all Bobby can respond. They pick the trash-the students abused in ribbons and glitter for their small festival- and are moving outside to throw away in the correct garbage can. "I can totally believe you punch God in the face...you and Monet have that bitch energy"

"I´ll not take offended because I know you and Monet. So, instead, I´ll say ...thank you"

"But aside seeing Rogue in all her awesomeness. You meet Nightcrawler...is he as handsome as the photos promise?" only Bobby to make this question. No, actually, many people would make this question.

Kitty mulls for a minute. Oh, many ladies would say how handsome he is. Kitty? She has to think about it. "He has golden eyes..."

"Man...you see Rogue and Nightcrawler and didn´t get an autograph?"

"Nah...Rogue was too busy and Nightcrawler was working...plus, my students record the whole exchange" Kitty promises to show the videos if Bobby truly wants to see. Kitty didn´t even need to ask. However, as they´re about to return to the school. Something happens. Rather...someone happens.

"KATYA!" his Russian voice is too familiar to Kitty and it can´t be no one else but Piotr Rasputin. "Are you cheating me with this man?" and Bobby is really confused.

"I´m gay buddy, and even if I wasn´t...she doesn´t seem to want to see you" and this was the wrong thing to say as Piotr is furious and is marching like a bull without thinking twice.

Bobby´s ice is strong, sadly, for once...Piotr´s stubbornness is beyond any logic and the ice is the first victim. Kitty touches Bobby making him and her unchangeable. And she quickly phases him down as Piotr is not thinking clearly.

"So...that´s your ex?"

"That´s my biggest mistake!"

___________________________________________________________________________________________ Kurt is more than aware of his effects on women. He´s acutely aware how some ladies do eye him different-his big sister often jokes she can go anywhere with him without a lady trying to flirt with him- accordingly, follow his mother´s suggestion wouldn´t be an impossible choice, however, Kurt is trying not to be a manslut-there´re limits he needs to respect and he needs and wants the ladies to respect his own limits- Kurt wants to know more about this history teacher.

Arriving in her school wouldn´t be too stalkerish-Oh, he sure hopes not- as he wants to inform her about the Juggernaut's case-nothing fair in this scenario and certainly not problematic on his part- as soon Kurt arrives in the school...he sees a man cover in metal slamming his fist on the ground shouting the word "Katya" like a lunatic.

And Kurt has to rescue whoever this Katya is. Fighting a man with metal skin is a tricky situation- Rogue would punch his face and be done. Oh, how he sometimes envy her super-strength- But thanks to his swords and his teleportations prowess. The lunatic was defeated.

And a woman phased in with another man. Kitty Pryde looks at the unconscious Piotr Rasputin and back to Kurt. "He´s not dead...he´s drowsy...is he your husband?" Kurt asked not sure what to ask. He saw this behavior with abusive husbands in the past.

Kitty frowns. "No, thank god...what will happen with him?"

Kurt looks at her. She looks shaken-rightfully so- and at the same time, her eyes hold a fury-direct to Piotr. Not Kurt, an important detail to notice- and then looks at her companion. "If you press charge...he´ll be arrested and won´t be able to hurt you or anyone else ever again"

Kitty is looking at Bobby as if asking his opinion. "That lunatic almost killed us...yes, let´s press charge..."

Kitty looks ashamed. "I should have press charges way back" she mutters and looks way different from the first time Kurt saw it- Kurt won´t lie and say he has any sympathize for Piotr- "I´ll press charges as well" _____________________________________________________________________________________

Queen Wanda is not exactly happy to know her sons- her precious boys- were almost kidnapped and it was thanks to the wannabe kidnapper´s stupidity that this grim scenario didn´t happen. In fact, she´s happy it wasn't her kids or even an innocent kid.

However, she´s the Queen. And a Queen shouldn´t let this incident goes by without taking some action. So, Pietro and Lorna are discussing what could lead Juggernaut, of all people, to try to kidnap the princes of Genosha.

"Juggernaut is strong and dumb...so, he wouldn´t come with this idea alone...or would he?" Wanda begins.

"He´s not a mutant, right? Are we sure this isn´t just a case of Mutant envy? Look, you´re really, really powerful and some humans seem to think you can give and take powers" Lorna adds to the conversation.

"Are we sure this has nothing to do with our father?" Pietro asked and Wanda sighs as she knows where this will go. Lorna and Pietro have different views in regards to Magneto.

"Pietro, the man is not even here...why he would do this with his own grandchildren?"

"Why he would try to kill his own kids?"

"Enough!" Wanda cuts them before the argument gets uglies. "Pietro, Magneto is not here...and Lorna, Magneto will forever be a bad memory for us, please, respect this"

"Look...what if Wakanda influenced Juggernaut?" Pietro pipes in and Lorna seems to take this idea.

"Yeah, Genosha and Wakanda aren´t allies nor enemies...and again, Wanda, you´re so powerful...people are bound to want some leverage against you"

Wanda frowns at such words.

"Let´s look at this way, maybe this is an isolated case...and we´ll not have to worry, but, if not...we can be ready to do whatever it can to protect Genosha and our family" Pietro promised and Wanda agrees.

"Revanche aka Kwanon is having a chat with Juggernaut...soon we´ll know what this man wanted...worry before time never helps anyone, sister" Lorna concludes softly and Wanda nods. She hopes this is an isolated case.

#House of M redone au #kurt wagner #kitty pryde #Piotr is Piotr #this is not me bashing him...this is me using what he did in canon against him #wanda maximoff #pietro maximoff #lorna dane #jubilee lee #jubs has a crush #In this house we respect Kwanon