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#the beauty comes from being content in the present and just. finding joy where you can
vt-scribbles · 7 months
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Hey! I just wanted to like. personally thank you for your tags on that post about being 13-15. I’m 20 and I’m just. I don’t know. It’s really nice to know that there’s no rush to get my shit together. You don’t have to post this if you don’t want, but from one stranger to another, thank you. I hope the future is kind to us both.
You are /more/ than welcome Anon.
I know when I was around 17-20, I wish someone would have told me that. I wish someone would have reassured me
"You're not an '''adult''' by 30. In fact, the idea of 'becoming an adult' is a lie. Everyone is a child, slowly figuring things out.
You'll be 25 and be 10 in maturity in some places, and 45 in others. You'll be 19 and be as mature as a 28 year old. 60 with the maturity of a 12 year old.
Age is a lie, maturity is a slow process, and everyone should always be growing. The idea that you become 'a mature adult' at a 'certain age' is a paradox, and is not helpful to you when you're young and scared and figuring yourself out before you can figure your LIFE out.
Your art will get better. Your friend group will get bigger. You'll laugh more, write more, reach out to your role models and realize they're all just people like you. Figuring things out. Fucking up. Being scared. We're all a little bit scared. But we all figure things out despite the fear.
So long as you take things at a healthy pace, you'll be okay. You'll feel like 'it's the end of the world' so many times, and you'll get through them. And it's worth it to stick around."
There's never a rush to get your shit together. Most people don't have their life together, or figured out. We're all just kids with back pain and bills. But, y'know. We get to watch the movies we want and eat the food we like, so. It's not so bad. <3
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twstowo · 3 months
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Hello, my first request here, if it's not inconvenient I would like to make a request, where Leona and Jamil have a boyfriend or girlfriend, who likes to shower them with love and affection, for example he is always giving them kisses on the face, or spoiling them , giving gifts, practically a Y/N who is overflowing with love for her boyfriend (my boys need more love)
♡︎I'm so sorry for taking so long to answer you! I also hope you don't mind but I decided to add more characters since I really liked your idea!
♡︎Includes: Second Years and Leona
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⋆⋅☆Leona:
Leona tends to be quite dramatic about it. He can't easily accept the fact that you love him so much and genuinely enjoy showing him affection. In public, if you start giving him kisses or hugs, he may initially be reluctant to reciprocate. He'll likely playfully tease you, hoping to embarrass you enough to tone it down. If you persist, he might have to leave, or he'll end up smiling like a fool.
When you give him gifts, he'll constantly ask why you chose that particular item. It's not that he dislikes it, on the contrary, he'll cherish your gift forever. He just struggles with expressing his feelings. Overall, he appreciates your affection but finds it challenging to show it. Please bear with him, he's genuinely trying his best.
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⋆⋅☆Riddle:
If you kiss him unexpectedly in public, he'll become irritated and pause to explain why it's inappropriate. However, he won't be able to finish his sentence once he catches a glimpse of your face—your beautiful eyes and very kissable lips. Suddenly, he finds himself on the receiving end of improper actions. By the Seven, you might be the end of him.
Not particularly fond of public displays of affection, Riddle believes those moments should remain private. If you shower him with affection in private, he'll feel content. Despite being giddy and somewhat embarrassed by these newfound feelings, he'll reciprocate the affection.
When you give him gifts, he'll always be polite, expressing gratitude no matter the item, and he'll often seal it with a kiss on the cheek. The next time you meet, he'll make sure to present you with a sizable bouquet of roses.
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⋆⋅☆Ruggie:
Nervously laughing throughout the entire encounter, he's taken aback when you kiss him in front of everyone. A faint blush graces his face as he responds with his signature silly laugh. Your affection fills him with happiness, he couldn't ask for a better partner. While he tries to reciprocate your affection, he's more reserved when there are many people around.
Receiving gifts from you brings him immense joy, as he's never experienced such gestures from anyone else before. He'll eagerly try to reciprocate, often offering food or a random flower he's come across.
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⋆⋅☆Azul:
Azul appreciates all the attention and affection you give him, but he's a bit cautious about public displays due to his business image. He politely asks you to keep things low-key when you're around others, knowing how easily he can lose composure when you shower him with kisses.
As someone who enjoys spoiling you with gifts, Azul would be delighted if you reciprocated with small items he likes. It adds an extra layer of joy to his already generous gift-giving habits.
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⋆⋅☆Jade:
Jade thoroughly enjoys teasing you about your affectionate gestures, finding delight in the moments he catches you off guard. He doesn't shy away from planting random kisses on you throughout the day, relishing in the joy of seeing you blush and feel embarrassed. Doesn’t care about you being affectionate in public, after all, no one dares to stare at the two of you.
If you present Jade with little mushroom trinkets, especially different species, he'll be overjoyed. It shows your interest in his hobbies and proves that you pay attention to the things he shares and cares about.
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⋆⋅☆Floyd:
If he is in a good mood, he will be as affectionate as you and won’t let you leave him until he is satisfied. If he is in a bad mood don’t expect him to be very into it as he will probably just accept your affection and won’t care much about it, he might even just leave. Don’t take it personally, because sooner or later he will come back in a good mood and the two of you can just be all lovey-dovey again.
He will keep all of your presents and even likes giving you small stuff that he finds that makes him think of you. He will literally bring you a rock and say it reminded him of you.
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⋆⋅☆Kalim:
The two of you are a perfect match. If you initiate any form of affection, he'll reciprocate with double the enthusiasm, it's almost like a competition. A simple kiss on the cheek in the school hallway turns into him spinning you around in a joyous hug while showering your face with nonstop kisses. Despite the disapproving looks from onlookers, the two of you remain unfazed.
When it comes to gifts, he reciprocates with double the generosity. You find yourself receiving so many presents from him that you're not sure where to put them all by the end of the day. His enthusiasm for gift-giving knows no bounds, and he takes joy in showering you with tokens of his affection.
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⋆⋅☆Jamil:
In public, he tends to distance himself if you initiate affection, firmly believing such moments should be private. When it's just the two of you, he initially feels uneasy being the center of attention. However, as you shower him with endless kisses, he experiences for the first time a mix of vulnerability and trust, allowing you to express your love freely.
He genuinely appreciates both small and large gifts from you, especially when they align with things he mentioned liking before. It makes him feel valued and heard, knowing that you pay attention to the details of his preferences. As a gesture of gratitude, he ensures that you're treated to freshly prepared meals every single day. He takes pleasure in observing your reactions as you enjoy the food he lovingly makes for you.
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⋆⋅☆Silver:
Both of you are really into it, turning into a sappy couple. At the start, he was a bit shy about the affection you showered him with, but as time passed, he opened up to it, caring less about whether people are watching. After all, you two are dating, so expressing your feelings is only natural.
When it comes to gifts he accepts every one of them, but he does struggle with finding the right things to give in return. Seeking advice from Lilia, he often brings you flowers as a thoughtful gesture.
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thestitchywitchy · 1 year
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Your Next Glow Up
Hey spooky babes, another PAC for you. It's the second most voted on from my poll. Pretty self explanatory... This one revolves around your next glow up! Hope you guys enjoy and please leave feedback 😘
**Disclaimer**: these readings are for entertainment purposes only. It's your responsibility to take what resonates. I'm only a person so myself and these readings can be infallible. That's life, please don't hold it against me lol
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To book a reading with me, please DM me or send an email to [email protected] with your inquiry 💌
My Links 🔮<- please support your witch💕 -> Masterlist
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Here we go! Shake it out, take a breath, close your eyes, and choose a picture that calls out most to you. This is a general reading, so take what resonates and leave what doesn’t. If you feel inclined to choose more than one group, please feel free to do so.
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Pictures from Pinterest, editing done by me.
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👁 Pile One - Hand ✋
5 of Wands reversed, 2 of Cups, 9 of Cups - Strength
Hi there, pile 1. Welcome to your reading! Your next glow up won’t be a physical glow up necessarily, but will be a time of growth, balance, and personal empowerment. In this time, any previous conflicts or challenges that may have caused stress and anxiety will begin to dissipate for you. You will have a period of peace, harmony, and cooperation with those around you in your life. You may have or are about to overcome some obstacles or disagreements, which you’ve come so far from! Good for you, pile one. Now you can focus on your next steps with more clarity and direction. You may not have been the most emotionally healthy individual in your past, but now I see you being a much more emotionally balanced individual during your next glow up.
Not only will you become more emotionally balanced within yourself, this energy will bleed into your close relationships, especially romantic ones. You’re also really solidifying your close platonic relationships with ease. You may meet someone new or form a deeper connection with your existing partner, as well. The Yin Yang symbol keeps popping into my head, so I see a lot of balance and harmony for you. There’s just all around satisfaction, happiness, and contentment revolving around your next glow up. That makes me so happy for you, pile 1! 😊 You will gain a sense of emotional fulfillment and achievement that you didn’t have prior. You may be enjoying the fruits of your labor and feeling proud of what you have accomplished and that you should! It’s time for you to celebrate you and your success. You are going to be at a point where you can appreciate the simple things in life and find joy in the present moment. I see you guys lounging by a body of water…lake, beach, pool..take whatever resonates, enjoying your new found sense of peace.
You’ve been through so much in the past, pile one. And through it, you’ve come out of it courageous, resilient, and full of inner strength. You know in your heart of hearts that you have the ability to overcome any obstacles that may come your way. You may be facing a challenging situation currently, but you have the power and determination to face it head-on and come out victorious. You have a lot of self-discipline and control that will lead you to your next glow up. Stick to your unwavering strong sense of purpose and it won’t steer you wrong.
Overall, your next glow up will involve overcoming previous challenges, forming strong relationships, finding emotional fulfillment and contentment, and tapping into your inner strength to face any obstacles that may arise. That is so beautiful, pile 1 and you deserve every bit of happiness that comes your way! 💜 hope you enjoyed your reading!
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🛸 Pile Two - Cow 🐄
The Lovers, Justice reversed, The Moon - Knight of Cups
Hello pile 2, thanks for stopping by! Your next glow up will revolve significantly around your romantic life. Get ready for deep and meaningful connections that are heading your way. You may be entering into a new relationship or deepening an existing one. I see that you’ve been working on your health recently. Most likely working out, getting back to the gym, and making healthier eating choices…and it’s really starting to pay off for you! Good job, pile 2. Proud of you 😊 These healthier choices are going to have an outward expression. Significant changes in your body and face. I see a more toned physique and you’re going to be wearing a brighter smile, and people are really going to notice this change in you! For those of you who are currently single, you may be getting a lot of suitors for you to choose from soon. For those of you that are in a relationship, you’re going to be making significant decisions regarding your relationship. A good handful of you may be getting engaged soon. Congratulations! Don’t forget to send me an invite 😉
So I’m picking up on something that’s happening in your current situation that’s holding you back from your glow up that I just want to touch base on real quick…. there may be some imbalance or unfairness in your life that needs to be addressed. You may be struggling to find a sense of justice or balance in your relationships or personal life. It is important to take responsibility for your actions and to make decisions that align with your values. If you’re in a relationship and you may currently be feeling stagnant or have been bickering a lot lately, understand that it takes two to tango and it’s not just your significant other causing all the issues. It’s important to self reflect on what you’re doing as well to cause these arguments and figure out what you actually want from this relationship. It can’t just fall on your partner’s shoulders. If you’re single, it’s time to figure out what you want from your relationships, your values and sense of worth, and what you’re willing to put up with. Regardless of your relationship status, you may be experiencing some confusion or uncertainty in your life, particularly when it comes to your emotions and relationships. It is important to trust your intuition and inner guidance during this time. And even more important to act on them rather than holding back.
Back to your next glow up… I see a lot of creativity, passion, and emotional depth being the main themes to your glow up. You may be feeling inspired and creative, particularly in the realm of love and relationships. You may be inspired with new date ideas, coming up with new ways to express your love romantically and platonically, or even just expressing yourself a lot more clearly and freely. Whether that be through art, self expression, dance, whatever you so desire or are intrigued by… this is beautiful energy, pile 2! This is the perfect time for you to follow your heart and pursue your passions with enthusiasm and conviction. Actually, I just got that for a lot of you, you may be starting a creative class soon? Dance specifically, but I’m also seeing singing classes or an instrument that you always wanted to learn but never got the chance to… painting will also help a lot of you soothe your mind. I see a lot of you going out to those paint and wine nights with your friends which is super cute. I love friend dates! Lol this is randomly specific, but those of you who have wanted to try vinyl art (like the cricut machine) but are too scared to try it should definitely stop doubting themselves and just start on that project already. Yeah, vinyl is tricky, but super worth it to learn! Whatever your creative endeavor is, lean into it, pile 2! You will not be disappointed 😊
Overall, your next glow up will involve deepening your connections with others and perusing creative endeavors. You may be faced with important decisions that require you to listen to your intuition and align with your values. It is important to take responsibility for your actions and to strive for balance and justice in your personal and professional life. This is a time of creativity, passion, and emotional depth, and you are encouraged to follow your heart and pursue your dreams with conviction. Don’t hold pack, pile 2. Let it rip! Hope you enjoyed your reading 💜
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💜 Pile Three - Ghost 👻
7 of Cups, 10 of Wands, Wheel of Fortune reversed - Knight of Cups
All right pile 3, let’s get to it! Ha, so you’re next glow up may be a confusing time for you because you’re going to have so many options and opportunities to choose from, you’re not going to be sure what direction to take! Honestly, not a bad situation to be in, but its going to be important for you to stay grounded and focus on what truly matters to you as you figure out your path. And since we’re being candidly honest here, I wholeheartedly encourage you to choose a selfish path for once.
Currently, you have a heavy burden or responsibility that you may be carrying. You may be feeling overwhelmed and overworked, but it is important to persevere and stay committed to your goals because in the end, you’re going to have so much abundance that you’re not going to know what to do with it all. I even see you giving some of your belongings or hand-me-downs to either friends, younger family members, or a charity? That’s not for all of you, but the image came to my mind. But I do see a lot of you just giving back to people in some way as appreciation to what the universe is about to bless you with. You make me want to cry, pile 3! You’re so giving 😭 remember, it important to give to yourself too, my precious babies!!
You may have experienced (or are currently experiencing) some setbacks or delays in your life. There is going to be a turning point in your life soon, but I’m seeing that you’re being resistant to this change. Let it happen, pile 3!! It is important to stay flexible and adaptable during this time. Trust me when I say this is going to be a welcomed change for you, you just have to go with the flow and **ALLOW** it to happen. The responsibility doesn’t always have to fall on your shoulders, allow others to shoulder some of the weight. Honestly, the people in your life want you to give up the load and help you but they just don’t know how to tell you that. You do so much for them, allow them to do the same for you. Once you give up some of your responsibility to others, you will see so, so, SO many doors open up for you that you weren’t able to go through previously because you had so many unnecessary burdens under your belt. The success of your next glow up revolves around how you handle your relationships. Not just with those around you, but also with your relationship with yourself.
You’re a person of creativity, passion, and emotional depth, but you’ve been stifling the part of you for too long. It’s time to lay down your load and start focusing on that part of you again. Save your burdens for another day, they’re not going anywhere whether you deal with them now or later. If you try to tackle them now, it will be a slow and frustrating process. So allow yourself this moment to refresh yourself and then tackle those burdens with a new state of mind. Spirit encourages you to follow your heart and pursue your passions with enthusiasm and conviction. Stop using your responsibilities as an excuse to stifle your creativity. Your creativity is just as much apart of you as you feel your responsibilities are… so don’t ignore it. If anything, lean into it. Then you’ll emerge from your cocoon refreshed, unburdened, and full of inspiration and possibilities.
Overall, your next glow up will involve making important decisions and staying focused on your creative goals despite feeling overwhelmed or burdened by day to day life. It is important to stay grounded and focused on what truly matters to you, even when faced with many options or opportunities that may seem confusing at this time. You may experience setbacks or delays before your next glow up, but it is important to stay flexible and adaptable and allow these changes to happen. This is a time of creativity, passion, and emotional depth, and you are encouraged to follow your heart and pursue your dreams wholeheartedly and with enthusiasm. I hope you enjoyed your reading, pile 3! 🥰
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Thank you for participating in this pick a card reading 😊 if you liked this reading and would like to dive in further, please DM me for a $7.77 extended reading 💞
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FINAL: Anne Shirley from Anne of Green Gables vs Violet Baudelaire from A Series of Unfortunate Events
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Entrant propaganda under the cut:
Anne Shirley:
The poster child for female-presenting ADHD before the diagnosis even existed for stereotypical hyperactive boys, she's a mess who always seems to stumble into trouble and generally seems like just too MUCH for more than one character, yet her general enthusiasm, creativity, and determination just compells people to love her sometimes against their will. And if you tell her she's in this competition, she will NOT STOP until she comes out on top.
because she's the most delightful little girl in the world & anne of green gables has held on as a classic for over a century
wild and wacky Troublesome girl representation!! also her deep love for diana!
Smart, imaginative, loyal orphan from a classic book series
The original kid lit Queen!
Anne has a big imagination and a big heart! She is full of passion and always tries to do best by the people she loves. She turns Green Gables upside down when she arrives and opens up everyone's heart right up. This competition wouldn't be complete without her!!!
A classic weird girl icon. I love her so much.
As someone who was always taught to be the 'good little girl' - Anne whacking Gilbert on the head for pulling on her hair made her an absolute legend in my mind. She loves nature, has a temper, and finally gets to enjoy the simple joys of childhood with her new family the Cuthberts.
she is so dear to my heart. she never stops talking and is always finding beauty in the world around her. she grows up through the series and reading it at different ages through the years meant I sort of got to grow up with her, which was really special to me. she has this wonderful story about finding family where she doesn't expect it and winning people over through being herself and being kind to them. also, canadian content <3
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dailyreverie · 1 year
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Poe + “I know we said no presents this year but…”
Love the way you write fluff ❤️❤️❤️
The first Noel Life Day
A/N: First of all, merry christmas if you are celebrating today!! I wish you all a wonderful holiday season full of joy and cheer!! Second, thank you so so much for sending a request! I hope you like it!!
☃️ December Writing Challenge! 🎄
Day 8: “I know we said no presents this year but…”
Pairing: Poe Dameron x reader
Word Count: 875 words
Warnings: Mentions of alcohol consumption
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[gif by @reylo-solo]
With a dinner cooked by the two of you, the roaring fire in the chimney, and a few candles lighting up the room, you had more than enough to cozy up and enjoy; just you and Poe, that was the plan since the beginning, only him and you and the celebration of the happy life you were creating together. Moving out from the base was harder than expected, even after finding a place, your small house still needed some improvements, which may have required a bit more of an investment than you had thought of; but that was not a stopper to celebrate the Holidays, and you were not one to let Life Day go by without a proper celebration.
It was simple, homey, and intimate, exactly as you wanted it to be. No crowds or rushing somewhere, and more important: no gifts. You both agreed to it weeks before, promising that you don’t need gifts this year, that being there was more than enough gift for both.
After the most delicious dinner and almost a full bottle of wine, when you were happily talking and laughing in the comfort of your dinner table, Poe suddenly took a deep breath and stood up. “I hope you don’t get mad but I couldn’t resist myself…” Standing up he walked towards the living room shelf, opening one of the drawers that he knew for a fact you never open - the one with old mission journals that you promised you would never look at again -, and with the biggest smile he walked towards you, a small velvet bag hanging from his fingers.
“Oh my- Poe, sweetheart…” your heart swelled with love for Poe and his stupidly kind heart, just as your eyes began to fill with tears. “We said-”
“I know, I know we said no presents this year, but it is the first year we are on our own place, finally out of that mess.” His hand stretched over the table, inviting yours to join him there. He squeezed it when you did, his eyes smiling brightly at you all the while. “I wanted you to remember it.”
Sometimes, when you looked at Poe, you couldn’t believe how lucky you were. When you opened the bag your air snook out from your lungs, a gasp forming as you saw its content: a charm. The very same one you saw on that storefront at some planet you were at for a mission, the one you saw and said how beautiful it was. I’ll give it to you when we get our place, Poe had said then, when you were just shyly a few months in your relationship.”You remembered” You choked up with emotion, looking at the charm and remembering all you went through just to get to this place, this point in your lives in which you could, at last, have a moment in peace, one to just be happy and don’t worry about the next morning.
“I never forgot.” Poe squeezed your hand, giving you a look and a tiny smile that took your breath away. He stood up again, walking to stand behind you and removing the chain that hung around your neck and toying with it behind your back. “And, it goes right… here.” The chain dropped down your collarbones again where your fingers reached it, just to see the charm hanging next to his ring, right next to your heart. Poe kissed your cheek and your jaw before going back to his seat, a bright smile shining with the light of the fire.
“Well, this is ridiculous now…” You laughed at yourself, blinking back the tears, walking into the kitchen and coming back with a gift bag. “...I got you something too.” Handing the gift to Poe he joined your laugh, standing up and discarding the bag on the table just to be able to hug you tightly, rocking side to side to the rhythm of the song coming from BB-8.
“You were not supposed to get me anything.” He whispered, still not letting you go.
“Well, neither did you, you dummy, I wanted to surprise you” Your reply made Poe chuckle, clearly thinking the same thing about his gift. What all the no-gift deal was about you have no idea, because once Poe’s lips find yours you know you will always, no matter what, do all you can do to make him as happy as he is in that moment - and you know he will do the same too.
“I already had the gift, before we made that promise.” You confessed after a while, once the song finished.
Poe takes a step back, not letting go of your waist. “Me too.” He laughed. “Let’s promise not to be so damn stupid the next time.”
“That’s a promise I can keep.” You kissed him again, sealing the deal.
“Agreed,” Poe spoke against your lips. “Happy Life Day, sweetheart.”
“Happy Life Day, my love.” You get a little bit lost in the way he’s looking at you, in how his eyes are shining and his lips have this relaxed smile on them. You love him like that, gifts or not, happy and calm in between your arms, all for yourself on that cold night.
❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️
Thanks for reading! Please reblog and comment if you enjoyed it!
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lord-radish · 1 year
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Okay, I got to the part of Persona 4 where you befriend Naoto and learn something important about them. I've still got a while to go before this storyline wraps up, but while I think it's handled better and in a more earnest way than Danganronpa 1 handled a similar angle, I'm still pretty trepidatious about how the game is gonna approach the topic of gender.
My full thoughts are below the cut, and will probably evolve or further crystallize as I play more of the game. Character spoilers for Naoto and mild plot spoilers for Persona 4 are below.
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For context, Naoto is a male-presenting character who works with the police to solve crimes. The plot of Persona 4 concern a series of supernatural serial killings, and Naoto appears sporadically throughout the game as he investigates the killings alongside the police.
Eventually he uses himself as bait for the serial killer and get pulled into the TV world. Your group has to save him, and when you confront his Shadow, it's revealed that the male-presenting Naoto is actually AFAB.
After the reveal, the game switches from he/him pronouns to she/her pronouns. She keeps her androgyny to my understanding, but as they're addressing Naoto's mental health issues at the end of that dungeon - as Shadows manifest as repressed emotions the victims don't want to face - Yukiko goes "you didn't really want to be a man, you just wanted to be taken seriously".
I've only just finished that dungeon, but here are my current thoughts. For the most part, I'm going to go with she/her pronouns because it looks like that's how the Persona franchise from this point on is going to address her.
For starters, I can't help but compare Naoto's gender stuff to how a character from Danganronpa 1 was written. I can at least say based on the very small post-reveal content I've seen about Naoto that the way they've approached her gender non-conformity is a step above "lurid, disrespectful horseshit for the sake of a cheap twist". Like I really liked Danganronpa 1, but holy mother of fuck they handled that shit badly. Persona 4 looks like it's gonna be better about it.
That being said, I get the feeling that Persona 4 is going to lean super into Naoto as a woman now, and it's gonna be about how she can be feminine and how she actually does have innate feminine traits and it's OKAY, SHE DOESN'T HAVE TO HIDE ANYMORE. Like it's still a little how-do-you-do about how it approaches gender y'know.
A significant aspect of Naoto's motivation is that women aren't taken seriously in the workplace, let alone a boy's club like the police. It's alleged that even back in 2009 when Persona 4 came out, the prospect of women in the police force was a tough nut that Japan was trying to crack due to how conservative the country is. Another factor is her age; being 15, the adult cops don't take her seriously despite her diligence, skill and talent at the job. Those are certainly significant motivations.
W
But what I thought was really telling and particularly beautiful about Naoto's explanation is that she would relate to and resonate with the gritty hard-boiled detective guys. She aspires to be like them. That can be written off as her simply aspiring to their level of skill and experience, but the way she speaks about them and how they make her feel, and the way she's chosen to present herself, really does come off as her finding solace and understanding and joy in that masculine presentation.
What I'm concerned is going to be the case is that people assert that her masculine presentation is rooted solely in the "glass ceiling" aspect of her character, and that the trans reading either inhibits that plot point or "doesn't make sense" or whatever the fuck. As if one of the plot points has to be the "objective" one, and the other one is in direct opposition and can't be mentioned in the same breath because it's "disrespectful".
Personally, I think both readings can co-exist. Naoto faces challenges as an AFAB person that are jarring to her in a professional context, at least - no reason that can't extend to a personal context too, finding an incongruity between feminine ideals and how she feels as a person.
Her desire to be a detective can easily be motivated by both a desire to assimilate and fit into an environment that would otherwise be hostile to her, and a desire to embody masculine ideals and presentation that gel with her in a way that femininity doesn't. Both can be true, and neither can be exclusive or set in stone - gender stuff can be messy.
Do I think that's how they're going to canonically handle Naoto's gender identity? Fuck no. But the same way you can read The Matrix as a trans allegory, I think you can read a lot into Naoto's character and come out the other side convinced that the way she presents as masc and goes by he/him pronouns for as long as she does, there's more to her gender presentation than just "going stealth to break the glass ceiling".
I genuinely do get the feeling that Naoto is, in fact, a trans man - or at least, Naoto could be a trans man if the game didn't go out of its way to shoot that down. Up until Yukiko says "I don't think you really want to be a man", the game could very easily run wild with a story of self-determination and holding onto what makes someone a man while embracing things that aren't traditionally masculine at the same time. I think viewing Naoto as a trans man is incredibly valid.
Again - this is based on the TV show dungeon where her backstory is laid out, and nothing more. My point of view could change and crystallize the more I play. This is an evolving viewpoint, but I just wanted to get my feelings out - Naoto, to me, reads like a trans man. I think the game's not going to be super kind to that interpretation the more I play, but I think it's gonna be better than Danganronpa 1 at least and I'm going to reserve my right to headcanon Naoto as trans going forward.
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sincostan-archives · 1 year
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To my dearest bangtan love —
My world, once just grayscale is presently a kaleidoscope of hue and that was all thanks to you, my seven. You painted my sky in shades of genuine love that will eternally stay and will carry comfort and peace to my heart each day that goes by. I want you to know that you have saved me more times that I could count. Each time it seems like everything is falling around — there you are, keeping me from tumbling down and helped me pick myself back. You have been the light who guided me home, fixed me, stayed with me, the flicker of hope that I desperately needed and outshines the darkest days of my life. I continue to thrive in every walk of life, simply because I am able to live and love you every single day that the heavens give.
I know I could never thank you enough, but I want you to know that— you are the most beautiful moment in my life, and I am everlastingly thankful that the stars aligned for us to meet— the day where true happiness blossomed. Thank you for not giving up in spite of all the battles that you have faced. Life hasn’t been always easy, it isn’t always rainbows and sunshine, there are also storms and strong breezes, yet you continued working hard to reach every dream, walking this path with us and illuminating our life; taking us out of the darkness simultaneously. I may not be there with you from the start, yet all of my love and support are with you, and you will never have to walk alone through life anymore, no matter what will happen from the first time I admit to myself that I am your ARMY until forevermore, as I have no greater gift to give.
You are my voice, my reasons. I never felt more safe and most belonged, I really did find my comfort and home in you guys when I couldn't find it else where. I know you guys would be with me ‘til the end of time, can we hold our hands in a long long time? I want to show how much your music and advocacies made me better, I want prove how much you’ve changed my life and make me try to be the best of myself. You seven are the reason why I’m still here, thriving with hope of spring to arrive soon nonetheless of how cold winter can get. I say it with pride whenever I scream that I am an ARMY. The most down-to-earth and amazing people has my back, write songs about and for me, and always gonna be my energy and hope in this world.
You have come a long way. I am beyond proud of you and seeing you live out your dreams is one of the best moments to experience with you. Thank you for being valiant to be where you are right at this moment, and for continuously using your voice to help us find our own. You inspire me every single day, and I will keep fighting in life, not just for me, but also for you. With you, I have found myself evolving, changing into the person I know I will be proud of someday and I hope that would make you proud, too. I will bring your wisdom along with me from this day to the uncertain future.
I have witnessed you grow, I have seen you at your best and your worst and I have loved both with a heart that is loaded with vast wishes only for your heart to always find a sense of contentment, that your every day be filled with warmth and love, to have the best life that is full of nothing, but smiles and joy. Thank you for everything you have done and given me. Here’s to more beautiful memories and more wonderful years with you.
To my heart and soul, my little universe, with all that I am and all I have yet to be... my heart will beat for you, endlessly. Continue to shine the brightest amidst the cluster of stars.
I love you more than you can imagine, my seven.
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takaraphoenix · 2 years
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Hey, sorry to bother you, I was just wondering if you could reword your rule about liking comics? I'm pretty sure I agree with you, but I'm developmentally disabled and I'm having trouble telling what you're saying there. Thank you!
Hi! No bother. And I think that may mostly be because you lack the context of the post, probably.
The thing is, someone came into my inbox telling me that I have "no right to like the comics" because I ship a ship that is canon in an adaptation but not in the main comic continuity.
So my post was kind of a direct response to that.
People like THAT have no right to like the comics. Because they lack the ability to understand that, more so than ANY other kind of fandom, comic fandoms include a huge multiverse of both comic continuities as well as adaptations.
There is no one "right" way to like characters, to like the stories of those characters - because there are countless canon variations of them. Be that the constantly reset main timeline, or Elseworlds comics, or adaptations.
Heck, there is no "right" ship for a character either; even if this wasn't about a ship that is canon in an official capacity. Even if this was a non-canon ship.
You (the general you, though yeah that also includes you personally, I guess xD) don't get to tell people what the "right" ship to like for a character is and to try and gatekeep comics from people who found their first spark of joy and interest in said comics through an adaptation.
Especially not nowadays, with the Arrowverse, the DCEU, the MCU. Adaptations are the first entry for many people. And many of those people will come out of those adaptations liking something that may be exclusive to said adaptation and that they may not find in the comics.
So, that's both the context and the more wordy rewording, I guess.
I don't think that people who think that they can dictate what others can and can't like and what the "right" way to enjoy comics is have any right to like the comics actually, because they're fundamentally missing the whole damn point.
The whole joy of this multiverse is that there's something for everyone! That even includes multishippers, because depending on the adaptation or comics, you may be presented with contradictory "canon" ships. It's okay if you don't like some of those, you're free to not watch those adaptations or not read those comics, you are free to instead seek content out - both in canon and in fanon - that focuses on the ships, characters, platonic dynamics, whatever you like.
That is the beauty of being in a comic fandom. And if someone truly can't grasp that, if someone's trying to force one strict narrative, one "right" read on it, only one way that others are allowed to enjoy them, then they honestly don't deserve to be in these fandoms.
I really do think that. If they want one clear canon, then they should go into a fandom where only one clear canon exists. Those... are a thing. Join a book fandom where no adaptation has been made of. Join a movie fandom where no remake has been made of. But don't go into a fandom whose entire premise is that a variety of versions of everything exists and where everyone is free to engage with whatever parts of it spark joy for them.
I do hope this cleared things up? If not, hit me back and tell me what parts didn't! ;)
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centerspirited · 3 months
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ezraproduction · 8 months
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#FemaleFilmmakerFriday: Liza Voloshin, Commercial Video Director
New Post has been published on https://ezraproductions.com/femalefilmakerfriday-liza-voloshin-commercial-video-director/
#FemaleFilmmakerFriday: Liza Voloshin, Commercial Video Director
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Ezra Productions is committed to fostering diverse talent in the video production industry. As part of that mission, our Female Filmmaker Friday series highlights best-in-class diverse directors, editors, and DPs from across the globe. This week, we’re excited to present Liza Voloshin.
Liza Voloshin is a NY-based commercial video director dedicated to spreading joy through video production. Liza’s work spans from directing commercials for beauty and fashion brands like Estée Lauder and Barneys, docu-narrative branded content videos for brands like American Express and Nike that feature women’s stories, to narrative film installations that explore the senses with institutions such as the Whitney Museum and Philip Johnson’s Glass House, to music videos with artists such as Adeline and Katy Perry.
We had the pleasure of sitting down with Liza to get a peek into her world and how she got to where she is today.
  How and when did you decide to get into the world of video production?
My road to film was anything but typical. As a young refugee growing up in the United States, I was raised in an environment that encouraged safety and pragmatism. And in my case, that meant studying economics and going into investment banking. I felt stuck and uninspired for much of my twenties. My only outlet for freedom was to surround myself by creative people and a close group of friends that encouraged me to pursue inspiring projects. I began first by painting and then photography until I bought my first 8mm camera on Ebay – an old, but sturdy Canon 310xl. But that was it, I was hooked. I knew I wanted to tell stories through moving visual images and to share the way I always try to see the world no matter how difficult it gets – with a little beauty and joy.
Check out this video Liza directed for Nike Women, entitled “‘Zahra Lari: A Moving Portrait.”
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  Do you have any advice for other women who are in different fields but thinking about getting into film or commercial video production?
Just start. The world of film can often feel like a technical gauntlet, daunting and uninviting, but don’t let the noise deter you. Make a safe space for yourself to experiment and play without judgement – especially your own. Grab a friend, go to nature, wherever inspiration finds you, and have fun. See the work that will come out of your joy, and let that guide you.
  What it like being a female in the video production world? How about specifically as a female director? Do you have any funny or horror stories to tell?
There is a French phrase one of my clients told me I remind her of the saying “Main de fer dans un gant de velours,” which means “An iron hand in a velvet glove.” I spend a disproportionate amount of time thinking about the kind of leader I want to be and how I want everyone on the set to feel. My goal is always to create a collaborative environment in which everyone on the set has a clear objective with space to be creative in their role.  But the reality is, I’ve been called a bitch and told I don’t know what I’m doing – all by men on the crew. I bet a male director would probably just fire those people and never think about it again, but I do contemplate those moments and what I can do better in the future. And that is a pretty feminine trait.
This reminded us of a hilarious episode of “Flip the Script,” a series written and produced by the amazing Tessa Bell and Meredith Riley Stewart for Women in FIlm:
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    Do you think it’s important to help other women in the film industry?
Women were the first ones to take a chance on me and support me. I wouldn’t be creating film today if it wasn’t for the supportive women in my life, both in and out of the film industry. The barriers to entry are high in film, and you do need help from those in spaces of power to show you the way. And that’s why no matter how little much or power you have, you use it wisely and give back to the community around you. I love it when I get an unexpected email from a young woman that wants to explore her career path and talk through getting into film. I always make time for that. Also, I love the men that support women, they are just as important in getting more feminine energy into this industry.
  What video production project are you most proud of?
I love what my Director of Photography Chevy Tyler and I created for our triptych called “Join the World: Burgundy” for American Express x Departures Magazine. We had 5 days to film three different stories about next generation winemakers across a large region in France, with a crew of just the two of us and a wonderful camera assistant Archibald Vienot. It was pretty hectic with uncooperative weather and daily long drives to set, but it is one of my favorite documentary shorts I’ve created to date. And it was like bootcamp for wine! I love learning and I think I translated a little bit of that into a final beautiful series.
Take a peek at the video Liza directed for American Express x Departures Magazine:
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    Do you have any advice for other women filmmakers trying to break into the commercial video production world?
I love you, sister. Let’s shine.
  We’re so appreciative of female commercial director Liza for taking the time to share her story with us. As a woman-owned branded content studio and creative agency, Ezra Productions is committed to working with women, minorities, and young people, and helping them thrive in the video production industry. Whether you’re looking for a production company in Los Angeles or New York, we’re experts at creating engaging video that promotes your brand and social change. Contact us to learn more about our services as a commercial video production company.
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orszemgyorgy · 8 months
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Prioritizing Peace: The True Path to Settling
In a world that often glorifies material wealth, beauty, and social status, it’s easy to lose sight of what truly matters: peace. The hustle and bustle of modern life can pull us in many directions, leading us to prioritize the wrong things in our quest for contentment. However, the age-old wisdom “You settle where you find peace” holds truer than ever, reminding us of the fundamental importance of inner tranquility over external validations.
In a culture that constantly bombards us with images of luxury lifestyles and success stories, it’s crucial to differentiate between the pursuit of these ideals and the pursuit of personal fulfillment. While beauty, money, and status might bring fleeting moments of happiness, they often fail to provide the lasting contentment that peace can offer. Peace isn’t just the absence of conflict; it’s a state of mind where the chaos of life settles, and we find solace in the present moment.
But how do we go about settling where we find peace? It starts with self-awareness and introspection. Take a step back from the noise of society and tune in to your own feelings and desires. What truly brings you joy? What activities or environments make you feel most at ease? By identifying these factors, you can start to align your life with what genuinely resonates with your inner self.
Moreover, the pursuit of peace often involves letting go of societal expectations and comparisons. It’s easy to get caught up in the race for more money, better looks, and higher status, but these external markers of success can be misleading. True success lies in the ability to cultivate a sense of calm regardless of the circumstances. When you prioritize peace, you gain the resilience to weather life’s storms and the wisdom to appreciate life’s simple pleasures.
Setting aside the allure of materialism and societal pressures might seem challenging, but the rewards are immeasurable. Embracing a lifestyle focused on peace can lead to improved mental and emotional well-being. Studies show that individuals who prioritize inner contentment often experience reduced stress, enhanced creativity, and stronger relationships. When you settle where you find peace, you create a fertile ground for personal growth and self-discovery.
In conclusion, the adage “You settle where you find peace” serves as a powerful reminder to reevaluate our priorities and embrace the pursuit of genuine contentment. While beauty, money, and status have their place, they pale in comparison to the profound serenity that comes from within. By seeking peace, we open ourselves up to a life filled with meaningful connections, self-discovery, and a deep appreciation for the present moment. So, let us all strive to settle in the embrace of peace, and in doing so, find a richer and more fulfilling existence.
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Inner ☮️ Peace.
I feel inner peace is the feeling of contentment. An experience you have when you are free from anxiety, worry, stress, and negative emotions in general. A state of calmness that lets you live a sense of happiness that is not disturbed or affected by external events. Your mind hushes - leaves you in a beautiful, peaceful place. You don’t need to be extremely happy and feel “perfect” - to me, it’s a warm feeling that spreads through your body and feel it in your soul.
How can you get to this place of inner peace? I did a little research to help me on this part and I could write a bunch but I chose a few topics that are from experience and that I personally want to work on.
Of course - ✨Meditation✨ - would be at the top. Meditate to clear your mind and help you focus on nothing. So much easier said than done.. that is why we need to start practicing meditation.
Close your eyes,
Sit still,
And relax.
Focus on your breathing as you clear your mind. A great way to calm your thoughts and emotions. Inner peace comes from only one place and that is from within yourself.
✨Simplify Your Life.
Keeping your life simple. It will help you achieve peace by directing your energy to a single point. Break away from everything that hinders your progress, anything that drains your energy and holds you back. This could be an individual that’s in your life, maybe your job, or have a family member that gets to be too much. You’re feelings and state of mind matter just as much as the next.
Keep it simple and stay focused on what’s important. I can always elaborate more on this if you would like. Just leave a comment below or shoot me a message.
✨“Me” Time.
In the rush of the day - it is easy to worry about daily life, struggles, chores, try to please everyone at the same time.. neglecting your own feelings and needs. Nowadays with all that is wrong with the world alone is exhausting. You get done with today, then tomorrow, then the week, then months fly by. That feelings definitely does not being about inner peace. Take time out of for some “me time” - everyday. Create your happy place. What brings you joy, what thoughts instantly lift you up and lifts your mood.
This could be a hobby of some sort, reading a book, watch something you enjoy on tv, go for a walk, start off small and take just 15 minutes of your day for just YOU. Slowly increase it over time, maybe a half hour to an hour.
✨Be In The Present Moment.
The only moment that matters is now because it’s the moment that truly exists. You can not change the past nor predict the future. Focus on what you can control - The Present Moment. There are stressors all around us. We fear the future and are regretful of the past.
✨Keep A Positive Attitude.
Positive attitude leads you to a peaceful state of mind. If you always feel uncomfortable with yourself - you need to break this cycle and get rid of that habit. It will require more effort and work but you can train your mind to think more positively. Your mind can be your worst enemy.
✨This Too Shall Pass.
Everything that heads your way will also pass. Today’s darkness may be sunny tomorrow. Everything that happens today will pass and some times it is best to let it go. Especially over things and situations you have absolutely no control over. Don’t beat yourself up over mistakes you made. Your mistakes are an important part of your journey and will only make you wiser and more understanding of things. Tomorrow is a new day!
During this journey in search of inner peace - keep in mind you are not creating inner peace - it is already INSIDE you. You just have to dig deep to find it. Being at peace with yourself is a state in which your brain functions at its best level and achieves positive results. It seems hard to reach, too far away or unreal, you are not alone. Peace of mind and inner peace is not achieved overnight. It’s a spiritual journey that ultimately leads to a state where you no longer feel influenced by external events.
These are notes I have taken down for my own personal use and wanted to share with all of you! In hopes that we could all support one another and help one another to get to a more better place in our lives. Please feel free to leave comments below or message me if you feel this was helpful and if I should do more! I think in the album section, I will create topics that we will discuss throughout our journey together and it will be easier to find each prompt I wrote incase you’d like to read over it again in the future.
A lot of us are mentally misunderstood… myself included.. I made this group so others know they aren’t alone.. and we can get through this together.🤞🏻
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hisunshiine · 3 years
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To All The Men I’ve Fucked Before ; (M) jjk
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↣ When your secret 'sex' journal entries are somehow texted to the people they were written about, including a couple of coworkers and your best friend, you find your quiet work existence turned upside down. based off of TATBILB.
moodboards | playlist | Netflix ReImagined BTS Masterlist | TATMIFB masterlist 
↳ #NetflixReImaginedBTS: Jeon Jungkook x Reader starring in a fake dating au, photographer!JK, stylist!Reader
⟢ pairing: photographer!jungkook x stylist!reader
⟢ word count: 30.7k
⟢ genre + warnings: nsfw 18+, fake relationship, smluff © & angst, kissing, fluffy fake relationship cuteness, jealousy, jungkook needs help with feelings, clothed humping, explicit sexual content in the form of unprotected sex, multiple orgasms, body worship, cunnilingus, fingering, handjob, hickies, blowjob, creampie, begging, strip tease if you squint, baby petname, crying, feelings of heartbreak, oh did i mention angst? namkook fist fight, minimal arguing, minimal blood, other idols make brief appearances, OT7 is present 
⟢ summary: When your secret 'sex' journal entries are somehow texted to the people they were written about, including a couple of coworkers and your best friend, you find your quiet work existence turned upside down. based off of the netflix film and novel by jenny han, but different.
⟢ an: hello, hello! this is probably my favorite story to date that i’ve written and the longest one shot! I am so grateful to everyone who helped me by reading this (most are not on tumblr), but especially my baby hana, @taestulip​, who always reads and hypes me up. the movie/book series it’s based off of is honestly one of my faves, and turning it into an adult version was a lot of fun! I know i took out some characters and changed a lot of the plot devices, but for good reason, as it is it’s own novel, I did not want to encroach on that territory. fake dating au’s are some of my absolute faves and so i hope you enjoy this! sorry for the length, sksksks.
⟢ prologues: NJ & Reader | Love Triangle (coming soon) |
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The large glass building was located on the corner of the block, in the heart of the city. A sight to see from all corners of the downtown area, you loved that you worked at BigHit Music. Of course, housing the globally recognized idol duo, SeoulM8, made working there fun. You walked into the building, and swiped your badge as you made your way through the secured entrance and up the elevator to your office. 
The gold plaque on your door highlighted your name and position. To this day you’re still in awe to see your name engraved in sans serif with the words “Lead Wardrobe Stylist” written beneath it. You entered the office, flipping on the lights and smiling at the large board along the back wall. It was covered with the designs you would need for the upcoming shoot for SeoulM8’s fan content, first single off their newest album, and plans for the concert wardrobe as well. 
Placing your empty insulated coffee tumbler on your desk, you set down all of your belongings, organizing your design tablet, notebook, and favorite writing utensils before once again taking the tumbler in hand. A cup of coffee would be perfect to start your busy Monday before your meeting with Jimin and Taehyung about their wardrobe later today. 
Walking into the employee lounge area, you set about making your coffee. Others walked in and out, dropping off packed lunches and grabbing coffee as well, so you can’t help but hear the gossip as two of the women who work with SeoulM8 discuss the latest office drama.
“I can’t believe it. She broke up with him!” Becca said, her colorful pixie cut swaying slightly as she shook her head.
“She’s crazy, Jungkook is gorgeous; have you seen his thighs?” Theresa responded, twirling her dark purple curls in wonder.
You stirred in the caramel creamer slowly, listening to their conversation. Jeon Jungkook and Jeon Somin (no relation) had been dating for almost as long as you could remember. It was surprising to hear that they were broken up. 
“Somin is really pretty too, though, she could have any guy… What if that’s what it was?”
“You think someone better than Jungkook came along and wooed her?”
“I mean… I swore I heard a rumor that she went out on a date with one of the actors, but who knows. All we know for sure is that Jungkook is single.” 
Finishing your coffee, you closed the lid to your favorite cup and left the room, smiling politely to Becca and Theresa who provided you with the information that had your head reeling. The entire walk back to your office, and even once you were seated at the desk, you couldn’t stop thinking about Jungkook and Somin.
Somin was one of the first friends you made at BigHit School for Music and Artists when you transferred in after completing your AA requirements at another university. BHSMA operated differently than traditional universities, converting students to employees at the company associated with the school. It was where you met Jungkook, Jimin, and a few other people that you worked closely with at the company. After that first year though, you grew apart from some of the people you spent that entire first year with, making new friends, like the one walking in through your office door.
So lost in thoughts of the past, you almost knocked over your perfectly made coffee onto your design tablet, where you had been sketching aimlessly. A dimpled smile was the cause of your quickly beating heart, complimenting the face of Namjoon, who startled you when he called your name loudly.
“Joon, I swear, one day, you will be the death of me, and my electronics.”
“Listen, you dropped your phone all on your own, no one told you to be scared when I walked into the room.”
“Stop being so fucking loud when you enter, you startle people!”
He just laughed, his pretty eyes disappearing as he expelled joy. Namjoon was glowing, his tanned skin looking healthy and youthful. You couldn’t help but smile at him as he pushed his falling platinum hair out of his dark eyes and set his gaze on you.
“I think I’m gonna do it today, Y/N.”
You froze, smile still on display, but a little less enthusiastic than when he had first walked in.
“Do it?” You asked, wary as you saw his hand drift to his inside coat pocket.
“I love her, Y/N. I think I’m gonna ask her to be mine, always.” Namjoon removed a small velvet box from his pocket and you reached for it, hand trembling slightly. Namjoon, in his excitement, was oblivious to the way you shook, as well as the sound of your heart splintering. “Do you think Jennie will like it?”
Looking at the ring tucked into the box, you nodded, not trusting your voice. Of course Jennie would. It was beautiful. A rose gold band with an opulent Moonstone set in the middle, and two smaller diamonds set on either side. You knew that the moonstone was Joon’s favorite, he talked about how much he loved the moon countless late nights that you would sit with him in his studio.
“It’s gorgeous, Namjoon.” You said quietly. This time, he noticed the tremble of your voice, and stood worriedly from where he was perched on the corner of your desk.
“Whoa, what’s wrong?” He asked you, concerned by your demeanor.
“Nothing, I’m just so happy for you.” You lied, tilting your head back to blink away the forming tears. Believing you, he enveloped you into a hug and you hugged him back tightly, afraid to let go.
“Ah, you have a meeting soon and I’m here making you cry… I’ll see you after and tell you how it went! Good luck, Y/N!”
Namjoon exited your office, footsteps light as he headed towards his future… and away from you. Sinking into your chair, you take several steadying breaths in order to settle your heart. Why did it hurt so much? You had given up on the idea of you and Namjoon a long time ago. This wasn’t what you expected to have to deal with when you arrived to work, but you were a professional. Wiping your smudged eyeliner to clean up your makeup, you looked down at your design tablet, where you see the sketch of a professional camera held by a large hand up to a large doe eye half finished on your screen. 
Hitting the “new” button, you begin to draw anew on a clean canvas creating the concept for the concert design for your meeting with SeoulM8 later on.
Sitting at home, you massaged the soles of your feet as you rested on your couch with your younger sister, Yuna, who was doing her homework at the coffee table. It had been a long day, but Jimin and Taehyung loved your idea for their concert concept: young guys traveling Seoul for group songs, and angelic, soft individual images of them with feathered outfits to match their solo songs. 
“Yuna… Namjoon is getting engaged today.”
Your sister stopped working, turning to look at you with eyes wide. She had been diligently studying for the cosmetology courses she was taking at your alma mater in hopes of getting hired at the same company as you. This news threw her off track.
“What? He—wait, what?”
You nodded, letting out a deep sigh as you turned towards the floor to ceiling windows in the living room. Rain was steadily falling, the perfect backdrop to your mood.
“Both of our dreams are shattered. He showed me the ring and said he was proposing today. To Jennie.”
Yuna flung herself onto the couch dramatically. 
“Can we please drink to drown our sorrows? This homework can wait.” 
You nodded, turning on Netflix before getting up to grab the wine and glasses. While you stood on tiptoe at the edge of the counter, reaching up into the tall cabinet for the long stemmed glasses, the doorbell to your apartment rang.
“I’ll get it!” Yuna yelled, and so you clambered onto the counter, knees digging into the marble as you finally managed to reach your goal. 
“Oh! Namjoon?”
You almost slipped from where you were perched, confused as to why your newly engaged best friend would be loudly squelching his tennis shoes into your apartment and not ravishing his fiancee. You expected a text or call about the engagement, not a personally delivered update. 
You wouldn’t be able to pretend this time. 
Turning to look at the entryway, you see a downtrodden and sopping wet Namjoon, eyes rimmed red from crying.
“Joonie?” Your voice was soft, questioning. He maneuvered across the kitchen with just three big steps and pulled you into his arms. His body slotted between your thighs where you sat on the counter after almost falling, and he let loose a sob that broke your heart even more than earlier.
“Joon, what happened?” You asked, scared.
“J-Jennie… she said no.” Your eyes widened in shock, but you waited patiently for him to continue. “She’s moving to Japan, she took that expansion position… She broke up with me.”
It was a long night to say the least. 2 wine glasses turned into 3 once Namjoon had shown up. You grabbed some of his spare clothes for him to change into, threw his stuff in the washer, and joined Yuna and him back in the living room where they had both curled up and began watching The Start Up on Netflix. 
Climbing onto the couch, you wrapped your arm around him and placed your head on his shoulder. He kissed your forehead before settling in to watch TV, and you couldn’t help the way your heart reacted to it. He had always been affectionate with you during your time as best friends, though it had lessened some the more serious he and Jennie became. The difference now was that this time, he was single. A part of you hoped it could mean more in the future. 
By episode 2, Namjoon was asleep on Yuna’s shoulder; no surprise considering how tired he must have been. He had cried on his way to your apartment, and the last of his tears onto your shirt when he arrived. Luckily, you hadn’t yet changed out of your own work clothes, so when you grabbed his garments, you took the opportunity to change into a spaghetti strap tank and sweatpants for couch cuddling. You turned off the TV as you untangled yourself from him, stretching as he roused slightly from your movements. 
“Don’t you two just look like the sweetest couple,” you say yawning, gently teasing your sister who was beet red from your words. Her crush on Namjoon was nothing new, but not something she wanted him to know about. She already knew she was too young for him; seen as nothing more than his best friend’s little sister. A part of Yuna was jealous that you had better chances with him than she did.
“Shut it!” Her whisper is harsh, but Namjoon slept on, unaware of the sisterly teasing. “I already know you’re gonna write all about this in your sex book!” 
You rolled your eyes, having forgotten about your old journal that you kept. You just shrugged, leaning down to gently wake Namjoon so you can put him to bed.
“Come on sleepy… Let’s get up and go to bed okay?” 
His large frame shuffled across the living room and down the hallway to your room. You heard him plop heavily on your bed, probably already asleep without having pulled back the covers. You put the empty wine glasses into the sink and straightened up the living room a tiny bit before you went to your room as well. 
Not yet ready for bed, you sat at your desk with the small lamp on, staring at the old journal your sister reminded you about. The image on the front is faded; you can barely make out what it used to be as you’ve covered it with doodles and stickers that are peeling at the edges. Opening it, you turned through the pages, taking in the lengthy entries about the boys you’ve slept with, starting with the one you lost your virginity to. 
Your finger grazed across the fancy calligraphy where you wrote his name at the top in a purple gel pen in. Jeon Jungkook. You laughed at the way you wrote about him, first describing him as a person before giving the intimate details of the experience, and finally ending it with a brief message of what you had wanted to say to him. Your eyes scanned the page, certain sentences catching your attention as you read it. 
“...and the way he held my neck when he first entered me, I think I’m in love.”
“He said it was his first time too. Does this mean something?”
“Jungkook, having you as my first… I want you to be my last. You looked at me as if the galaxies were reflected in my eyes. I want to feel the way you make me feel all the time. I hope that this does change things between us, but in a good way.”
You cringe a little, remembering how it didn’t turn out that way. Instead, after that night 5 years ago, you didn’t talk to Jungkook for a couple of days due to exam week. You texted him after your last test and he told you to come over; he wanted to talk to you about something too. But when you went to his dorm to see him and confess, you found him with Somin, your best friend at the time. They weren’t doing anything outrageous, just sitting on his twin bed in his dorm room talking, but you heard what she was saying through the door that was cracked.
Somin was confessing. You had no idea that she liked him too. It made your heart tight knowing that he had slept with you a week prior, and now your best friend was confessing to him. To be fair, neither of you had told the other about your feelings towards him. So instead of walking in and telling him how you felt, you left. He had texted you later asking what happened to you coming over but you lied, saying you had gotten busy. 
On the last day of the semester, Somin shared that she was dating Jungkook. Shocked and heartbroken, you wasted no time packing up your dorm for the summer and traveling home. Phone calls, texts, and plans to meetup became less frequent between your group of friends over the following semester until they eventually stopped. Did you stop talking to Jungkook and Somin… or was it them that stopped talking to you? 
Turning the pages, you move on from the thoughts of the photographer and stop at the next blank page. Grabbing a blue gel pen from the cup on your desk, you write with flair. 
Kim Namjoon.
How do I even begin to express how I feel about you? God, you make my heart flutter. I met you at a time when I needed someone. You were the bane of my existence at first, blasting your loud music from the apartment under mine. Going to yell at you turned out to be the best thing. You turned out to be the best thing. Of course, you had just started going out on dates with Jennie and you would be graduating a year ahead of me, but I knew that we would stay best friends. I mean, most BHSMA students intern at and get hired by the company. So for the longest time, I hid my feelings from you. That one night, before you and Jennie were exclusive… when we had sex, I thought my heart would burst. I never wanted a man so badly before that night. You are the moon in my sky, Kim Namjoon. What other body could pull an entire ocean from shore to shore? What other being could wrap me in love from beginning to end? Tonight you have just lost your moon. I am a terrible person because a part of me is happy to not be losing her moon. So now, I will climb into bed next to your sleeping body and hold you close as we sleep, and pray when the morning comes, in the light of the day, you will open your eyes and see me—the faint moon in the sky that has always been there for you. Maybe you will finally see me—and decide you want me too.
Setting the pen down, you reach for your phone. In your slightly drunken state, you decided to take pictures of each entry, in order to move these to a more secure environment and take your journal digital. You snapped a picture of each page (not that there were many) before you checked your phone for messages and plugged it in. You left your room to shut down all the lights now that Yuna was finished putting away her stuff and making her way to bed as well. 
“Hey, can I grab an extra notebook from your stash? I need to finish taking these notes on mixing hair colors.”
“Sure, it’s under the desk in the blue bin.”
She nodded and you continued past her, double checking the door to make sure it was locked before moving to throw Namjoon’s clothes into the dryer. Once satisfied that the house was in order, you went to your room. Yuna was standing over your desk, eyes reading your latest entry into the journal.
“Yuna! Get out!”
“This is beautiful though, he should see it. You need to tell him how you feel!” 
You shook your head.
“No. He just got his heart broken. It’s not the time to tell him.”
“You’re stubborn,” she whispered back at you, “you’re gonna lose him again!”
“Then that’s how it was destined to be. But I am not taking advantage of his vulnerable state.”
“You’re gonna be single forever. Spending every night with your baby sister, drinking wine because all the men you have ever loved have moved on!”
“Go to bed, Yuna!”
She shrugged as she walked out of the room, knowing that she was right. Deep down, a part of you felt like she was right too. 
Climbing into bed, you struggled to lift the covers over Namjoon’s slumbering frame before it pulled free and you could cover the two of you. As you settled into the bed next to him, he instinctively wrapped his arm around you, pulling you to his chest in his sleep. 
You knew that his dreams were imagining Jennie in his arms instead. 
That next morning, you checked Namjoon’s phone for his calendar. Having known him for several years, you know his passcode and that he keeps his work schedule exclusively on his cell. Typing in the code, 0613, you saw that his calendar stated that he didn’t need to go to the office until around noon. 
Lucky, you thought, eyeing the time on the phone. It was a little past 6:45am, and you had to wake your sister for her hands-on class before you got ready for the day. 
“Yuna! It’s almost 7,” you say as you knocked on her door and heard a muffled response. You headed back to your room and chose your outfit, knowing that the day would be busy and long with the concept photoshoot for SeoulM8 starting today. Choosing your outfit wisely, you climbed into the shower a few minutes later and spent at least a half hour just trying to cure the small hangover from the wine. 
Once dressed, you found Yuna packing her bag for class. It was getting close to 8, which is the latest that you could leave to be at work on time, so you wrote a quick note to Namjoon and ran back to leave it on the bed. His hand snaked out of the covers just as you were pulling your hand back, a gentle grip to your wrist holding you there.
“Y/N, thank you for last night.” His voice is like a bullfrog’s croak, and you chuckled. 
“Let me get you some water and some pain meds, okay? And of course Joonie, I’m here for you.” You leaned onto the bed with one knee, smoothing his hair back from his face once he’s released your wrist. “Always.”
Pressing your lips to his warm forehead, he pulled you down onto the bed with a hug and you can’t help but laugh.
“I’ve got to go! I’ll see you later, okay?” He nodded before he grips your neck, bringing his lips to your forehead this time. His lips linger longer than usual, and you shut your eyes at the tenderness of his kiss. 
“Go back to sleep, now.” You pulled away from him, going to grab the medicine and water before you and Yuna leave the apartment. 
You made it to work with extra time to make your coffee, so after you dropped off all of your extra stuff, you grabbed your tumbler and work tablet with all of your drawn designs for today’s shoot and made your way through the busy halls to the employee lounge. Today, the door was propped open for ease as it was a busier day in the building. 
You stood at the counter, stirring in the caramel creamer that you loved, when you felt a presence enter the room behind you.
“Y/N.”
Turning lazily, you cocked your eyebrow at Jungkook, who was standing awkwardly behind you. He had kicked the doorstop, allowing the door to close so that the two of you stood alone in the small staff kitchen. His hands were tucked into his joggers, while a white button down hung loosely from his frame. 
“Whats up JK?” You asked, expecting him to address something about the shoot. You hadn’t yet seen the men you were to dress, so you couldn’t fathom he was here to complain already about the costuming. “If it’s about the wardrobe, I haven’t even seen Tae or Jimin yet, so—”
“Actually, no. Um,” he rubbed the back of his neck before making eye contact with you, “I know that when we had sex that one time, it was great—”
Instantly, alarm bells went off in your head. What the actual fuck was Jungkook doing talking about the night you lost your virginity to each other?
“—but I just... don’t feel the same way that you do about me. You know? That was years ago, and yeah while it was just as good for me as it was for you, I’m not in love with you or anything, I just broke up with Somin too, so—”
“Jungkook! Wait—what are you talking about?”
“The text you sent me.”
“Jungkook, I haven’t texted you in weeks.” You looked down at the phone you had pulled out of the back pocket of your ripped black jeans, and opened up the messages. You noticed his text thread was now at the top. “Wait, what?”
Opening his specific thread you see the screenshot of the page from your journal that you took last night, sent to him. How the fuck did this happen? In your drunken state, did you send it to him? You begin to ramble as you throw the spoon in the sink with a loud clunk and begin screwing the lid on the coffee.
“Jungkook, stop. That was from a long time ago, it’s not recent at all, oh my god. I am so sorry you had to read that—you know what, I’m just gonna head to the set now. Okay, bye!” You breezed past him, feet carrying you out of the employee lounge with a swiftness. Once back in your office you stared at the horrid message, outraged at yourself for your drunken antics.
Drunk you must really hate sober you.
Work was just as hectic as you thought it was going to be. After the most embarrassing morning, you were summoned right away to a last minute meeting with Jimin and Tae, where you made minor changes to their wardrobe. 
“Y/N, you were always good at this in school, but damn. You are amazing now.” Jimin stared at you reflected in the mirror after you had turned his outfit into something fit for the concept with a few movements of the material that wrapped his body. Park Jimin, one of the few people you were still somewhat close with from that first year of school, was now a big shot idol, and one-half of SeoulM8. Kim Taehyung, his best friend, was the other part of the duo. He had met him after everyone split off after that first year. Going by the stage names Jimin and V, the two had met in their vocal lesson classes when Taehyung had switched his major, and BigHit saw potential in them. 
You walked with Jimin towards the set of the photo shoot, one of the bigger production rooms today due to the use of the second level. They would be posing next to a hole in the floor, feathers falling around them. Taehyung was already antsy to get started, and was playing around with Somin, who was one of the group’s managers, while he waited for Jimin to arrive back to the set. Now, it looked like the only person missing was the photographer. 
Walking to the fold out table set up at the back wall, you heard your phone chime. Opening to your messages, you saw a text from someone you hadn’t talked to in a while. 
“Seo Joon?” You question quietly to yourself, but before you could even read the message, you saw a similarly embarrassing photo above his reply.
“Oh God, oh God...” You clicked out of his message thread, ignoring the reply because you honestly didn’t care. What you actually cared about was if you had somehow sent the most recent entry of your journal to the last person on Earth who was ready to read it. Namjoon.
“Fuck. Oh no. Oh no.” Sitting there, you saw the message clear as day with the small read receipt that it indeed had been read by him. The door to the set opened and Jungkook came waltzing through with his assistant. Before the door had a chance to swing closed all the way, you saw Namjoon’s form enter the room. 
“Alright, let’s get started!” Jungkook’s voice was loud and called everyone’s attention except for Namjoon. His eyes were on you. He beelined your way, and you readied yourself to apologize to him, but before either of you could say anything, Jungkook interrupted.
“Hey Joon, good to see you hyung! I’m so sorry though, we got a closed set and need to get started… tight time schedule and all.”
“I just need to talk to Y/N.”
Jungkook took in Namjoon’s demeanor; eyes red, hair disheveled, voice wobbly. It was so unlike Namjoon to look this way that Jungkook looked at you before speaking. Your expression was confusing to Jungkook, as he knew Namjoon was your best friend. Your eyes were wide in fear with tears forming… when you didn’t say a word, Jungkook took charge. A part of him saw that fear in your eyes and wanted to protect you.
“Look Joon-hyung, normally I wouldn’t mind, but we need Y/N on set the entire time today. Wardrobe is important for concept photos, you can understand right? Maybe at break time or something?”
Namjoon nodded as Jungkook’s arm wrapped around your waist and he led you away from the table and back towards where the staging was set. When you finally chanced a look back, you saw the assistants leading Namjoon and a few other non-essential workers out of the room. Everyone else on set had watched the exchange between the three of you, including Somin. Her eyes narrowed as she took in the way Jungkook’s fingers curled around your frame.
At break time, you hid out, avoiding Namjoon who had, reluctantly, waited several hours until break was called. He would have to go into the studio soon, which you knew since you saw his calendar, and after the short 30 minute break, Jungkook retrieved you from the small side room you were hiding in when they resumed the next set of shots using black leather and wings. 
The shoot kept your thoughts off of the incident, as you so aptly decided to call it in your head, until it was time to leave. You walked out with a large group, stealthily making it to your office. You sat on the floor with your back to the door, reviewing how many received these drunken messages of yours, happy to see that only 3 actually went through, since most of them were no longer in your phone anymore or had changed their numbers. 
Park Seo Joon, an ex from your second year at BHSMA, had moved to Japan for work, and while he did respond, he figured it was a mistake and as the smart person he was, he noticed the date in the corner and was aware that it was old. You breathed a sigh of relief, glad to have avoided that potentially awkward scenario.
Hearing your phone ping, you checked the message and saw it was Jungkook. A series of messages came in from him, and you read them in succession.
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Shaking your head, you stand, grabbing the white outfits from the rack an assistant had brought in earlier after the set change. Throwing them over your arm, you head off to the set in a rush, shooting back a quick text to let him know you were coming.
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Most everyone from earlier was back on set, expressions showcasing various stages of irritation. You handed the clothing to an unusually quiet Somin, and lifted your now free arm to wave at the artists. Somin walked away, throwing quiet looks over at you and Jungkook, who you were standing near now that you had approached the table. Jungkook was leaning on that same table, arms crossed as he reviewed the printout of what was needed.
“You know they sent us an updated list 2 hours after we started shooting? While we were all here, they thought that we could somehow read their minds. Then when I uploaded and sent the file over to have them double check, they responded that we had to finish it tonight.”
“It’s annoying for sure, JK, but you know Jimin and Tae will deliver. Once they’re dressed I bet we’ll be done in like 15 minutes, max.”
He nodded, smiling at your optimism.
“Hey, are you gonna tell me what earlier was about? With Namjoon hyung?”
You froze, not expecting the question, but you were saved from having to answer right then, since Namjoon walked in at that moment. It was too late for you to go anywhere; you were standing too close to the door, trapped between the table and Namjoon, who looked hurt. Jungkook read the situation and took several steps away to give you some privacy with Namjoon. 
“You’ve been avoiding me all day. After that message—did you think that I wouldn’t read it? I just broke up with Jennie, Y/N, it’s… I’m not… You can’t just say this shit to me right now.”
“Namjoon—I didn’t mean to, I was drunk and I promise you it’s not what you think, I don’t feel that way, okay?” You try and take it all back, wishing more than anything that he hadn’t read what you had written the previous night. 
“You don’t feel that way? Are you kidding me? I read it!”
“No, I don’t feel that way, okay? I’m with someone else.” You lied. You hoped that he would buy it.
“Y/N, I’m your best friend. Don’t you think I would know?”
“Yeah, you're my best friend, but you and Jennie are always together, it’s been forever since we actually caught up, so yes, it’s recent okay?”
“Who are you dating then?”
You say the first name that popped into your head. The person closest to you.
“Jeon Jungkook.”
“I don’t believe it.” His words come out harsh, and a part of you, the part that already feels like shit because Namjoon chose to be with Jennie a couple of years ago, lashes out in hurt.
“Why? Cause someone like him could never date someone like me?”
“Yes, Y/N. You guys are too different!” His voice was getting louder, and you knew that you had to do something in order to get him to believe your lie. So you do the only thing you can think of in your heated state. You take the several steps needed to cross the space between you and Jungkook, who looked up from where he was absorbed into his phone. 
“You ready?” he asked, looking down at your small frame. 
“Yeah baby, I’m ready.” Your hand snaked behind his head, and firmly grasping his neck, you leaned up on tiptoes as you pulled his mouth toward yours. You kissed him, and in his surprise, his free hands gripped your waist and he pulled you closer to him, before you were separating from him, slightly breathless. His grip tightened before it rested gently on your hip and you settled back onto your heels. 
You see the back of Namjoon’s coat trail behind him as he disappeared out the doors, pulling them shut loudly behind him.
You look back up at Jungkook, whose fingers squeeze your sides quickly to grab your attention.
“You’re definitely gonna have to explain after that kiss... baby.” 
Later that evening, you sat with Jungkook in his car. A black Mercedes Benz GT63S to be exact, with dark grey leather and a small bit of wood grain along the spacious dashboard. Your fingers trailed along the wood grain as you explained to Jungkook what happened, starting with the accidental drunk text messages, leading up to the reason behind your kiss. 
“So now what?” Jungkook asks, looking sideways over at you.
“I don’t know. I feel so stupid.”
“Look, Y/N… I think this could be mutually beneficial.”
You meet his eyes, a look of incredulity across your face.
“Please explain Jeon.”
“Look, earlier when I stepped in and kicked hyung off set, Somin was already eyeing the way we were behaving. She may or may not have texted me about it. Of course, I told her we were broken up, so she didn’t need to concern herself with my business. And then, when we came back to set, she made a face when they asked me to text you to come back too.” He smirked.
“I may or may not have peeped it, and may or may not have used it to my advantage. Of course, you kissing me definitely helped.” He glanced down at his phone as it lit up. Once again a message from Somin tiled above 17 other messages from her. He had been actively ignoring them while the two of you talked.
“So I say that we date.”
“We what?”
“Date. I can teach Somin a lesson about how to treat me and you can keep hyung off your back.”
“Teach Somin? I thought she broke up with you?”
“It was mutual. But this always happens. And I for one am tired of the back and forth. So this can teach her that other people want me, and I can move on, or she can stop with the drama and we stop breaking up every other week.”
You nodded. It sounded like a feasible plan, and you told him as much.
“So it’s agreed. We’re now together.”
“Not so fast, Jeon… I think we should have a backstory, get some things straight, set some rules.”
“Rules, Y/N? You sure know how to take the fun out of it.”
You rolled your eyes.
“When did we start dating?” you asked, ignoring his snide comment.
“We got together… at the beginning of the week. Somin and I broke up 2 weeks ago, though we didn’t make it public because she always does this shit...” he trailed off, before smiling back at you. “So yeah, let’s say we’ve been talking here and there everytime me and Somin would break up, and then we went on a couple dates during that first week we broke up and made it exclusive this week.”
You commit this to memory, then pull out your tablet and begin jotting it down with the stylus.
“Okay, so this is new, but we’ve been on each other’s radar for a bit. I think that’s believable, especially since we’ve known each other just as long as you and Somin have. How do you plan to make her jealous? It has to seem real, you know?”
“Trust me, she already thinks this is real,” he nods to his phone again, now at 28 unread messages from Somin, “so I think something that we can do is start arriving together. Maybe do little things for each other that are cute coupley things, be seen together. Kiss at work. Maybe I can sleep over a few nights or you at mine?” He winks at you.
“I thought you didn’t see me that way, Jeon.” You looked down at the tablet, furiously scribbling what he said in order to avoid looking at him and showing the way he caused your cheeks to warm.
“I said I wasn’t in love with you, babe, not that I wasn’t interested in sleeping with you again.”
“Yeah, well that’s off the table Jeon. This isn’t real.”
He just wagged his eyebrows at you seductively, but you laughed and moved on from it, reviewing the list you wrote out.
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You made sure to underline number seven so he could see it easily. 
“And when does this end?” You asked.
“Um, I don’t know. I guess we just play it by ear. Let it be natural. Obviously not too early or too late, and it should be mutual. I mean, if Somin learns her lesson, we would obviously have to end things, but I don’t see that happening sooner than a month.”
“Okay,” you tilt your head, thoughtfully, “So we can re-examine this in like a month then.”
“So is this like a contract or what?” he jokes. “Want me to sign it?”
“Sure,” you say, playing along and offering him the stylus. He took it from your hand and signed his signature, and then handed you back the pen, gesturing for you to sign as well. You followed suit, a quiet chuckle as you saved the page to your tablet’s files.
“Wanna drive me home, boyfriend?”
Dating Jungkook was… interesting, to say the least. You were a little surprised when he texted you the next morning asking what your coffee order was, and you weren’t expecting him to be so punctual when he pulled up to your apartment. But as you and Yuna exited the apartment that morning, he was already parked at the curb, music a little too loud for the early morning transit, but you were thankful nonetheless. 
“Why are you taking us?” Yuna asked in her very blunt manner. She, of course, had heard of Jungkook, more so due to your falling out with Somin, but Jungkook took her question in stride.
“Because I’m dating your sister.” 
He handed you an iced caramel latte with a soft smile that you couldn’t help but return. Jungkook looked stunningly handsome, hair floofed to your desired preference and an all black outfit to match. His pants were the perfect fit to his well-toned body and the black bomber jacket gave him a bad boy edge that was softened by his doe eyes.
Yuna coughed, choking on her strawberry flavored poptart as you turned to look out the window. Yuna, seated behind you, hit the back of your seat.
“You’re dating him? And you didn’t tell me?”
“I wanted to be sure it was going to work out this time… He and his ex used to be on and off a lot and I didn’t want to tell you if they got back together.” You answer, mixing the truth into it.
“Ohhhh, I see. You a player Jeon? Gonna break my sister’s heart?” Yuna eyed him, pupils narrowed as they stared at him. 
He cleared his throat, not expecting to have to defend himself against the small pitbull in the backseat.
“Not planning on it, Yuna.” Jungkook reached over and took your hand into his large one, interlocking your fingers before he kissed the back of your hand sweetly as he released the brakes and pulled off. 
Walking into the BigHit building, Jungkook held the door open for you before placing his hand in the back pocket of your black skinny jeans as you walked to the elevator. You wore a black knit sweater that fell slightly off the shoulder, and you knew it looked like you two had coordinated outfits. His other hand held the strap of the backpack he had slung over his shoulder while you clutched your coffee and your bag. 
You started to walk off towards your office once you made it to your floor, but Jungkook’s hand on your ass pulled you back towards him. He leaned down to your ear, whispering quietly.
“Where are you off too in such a hurry?”
“Um, my office… why?”
“Come with me to mine first, let me drop off my bag and I'll walk you back.”
“Oh-kay?” 
Letting his pocketed hand guide you, you fell in step with him down the hallway. You passed several other people, including Jin, an actor signed to the company who was known for his gossip, who nodded their hellos to Jungkook before ducking their heads together or reaching for their phones. It felt like high school all over again. Jungkook removed his hand from the warmth of your ass in order to open his office door, to which he then pulled you inside. Closing the door, he backed you into it rather loudly. The windows in the door are frosted, but you knew that pressed to it like this, anyone who looked could see your outline against it. 
Jungkook pushed his body into yours, lips following suit as his hands found purchase on your hips. He kissed you languidly, the mint from his toothpaste clashed with your coffee, though not unpleasant. You kissed him back, enjoying the feel of his soft pout as it glided to your neck. He wasted no time in latching on, suckling your neck for a few seconds before he pulled away with a loud smacking noise. 
“I must say, we put on quite the show this morning. My roommate was out there, and he will definitely have everyone talking about our PDA.” He grinned, eyes still glued to your neck. “Once that hickey sets in, it will really be the talk of the town.”
You blinked, finally coming back to your senses. Of course. This was all a part of the plan. Jungkook stepped away from you, moving to put away his belongings in his office. You stepped away from the door, looking around as you willed your body to cool down. That kiss had been quite an experience, and you yourself had gotten carried away with the plan. 
Turning on the spot, you notice all the different camera equipment lining the walls, the beautiful still photography of various buildings throughout the city, but the most surprising was a photo from the first year you had all met. The picture had you, Jungkook, Somin, Jimin, and a few other friends in it; smiles wide as you stood at the fairgrounds you attended, ferris wheel lighting up the sky behind you. You walked towards it, taking in how carefree you looked, arms wrapped around Jungkook’s waist and his arms thrown over your and Somin’s shoulders, who was making the peace sign with both hands at her eyes. Jimin was making a silly face, arm wrapped around Somin’s waist. Simpler times.
You moved on, turning to the small polaroid camera and you couldn’t help but grab it. Turning, you snapped a photo of Jungkook, who was caught off guard. You took the developing film from the camera and set it down on his desk as he smiled at you.
“Hmm, that’s a good idea. Let me take a few photos of you, I can place them around my office.”
You tried to reject his idea, but he takes the photos anyways, pinching your cheeks and tickling you until he gets what he wants. Finally, 6 clicks later, he stood next to you, facing the camera to the two of you before he said your name softly. You looked up at him, and he surprised you with a kiss. That 7th click captured a kiss, and he placed that one in the back of his phone case.
“You are such a… a lover, Jeon.” You say, pointing at his phone. He shrugged, ignoring your jab.
“It’s something Somin always wanted me to do… I never did though. So seeing this will piss her off.”
You nodded, understanding. Everything he did had a purpose for getting at Somin in some way, shape, or form. You chided yourself that you would do well to remember that. 
Lunch was a whole new ball game. Used to sitting with Namjoon and Jennie, or some of your assistants, you were now eating lunch with Jungkook, who ate in the employee cafeteria. You followed his request to meet him there and stood in the doorway lost until you heard his voice call out to you.
Noting his waving hand, you wove through the circular tables until you reached the one he was at with Jimin, Taehyung, Jin, and Yoongi, a producer friend that you knew through Namjoon.
All of the seats were taken, but before you could stand there looking out of place, Jungkook scooted his chair out and all but pulled you onto his lap. Wrapping his arms around your waist, he nuzzled into your neck, breathing in your clean scented perfume and strawberry shampoo.
“Get a room, JK.” Yoongi said, face contorted with a mock look of disgust.
“What? She’s just so cute and warm.” His fingers drifted towards the hem of your sweater and disappeared up into the material, cold fingers pressed against the soft skin of your belly and you shivered with a giggle, pushing his ice box hands away.
“You’re cold as fuck, Jesus Jeon! Were you hanging out in a freezer?”
“You could say that...” Taehyung laughed while elbowing Jimin, and you raised an eyebrow at them, wanting in on the joke, too.
“He was reviewing pictures with us and our managers.” Jimin clarified, and you nodded. 
“I take it that Somin wasn’t very warm?” You asked, leaning more into Jungkook.
“Not at all,” Tae disclosed, “she was very icy, had a lot to say about our dear JK over here, didn’t she?”
“Nothing we haven't heard before.” Jimin answered, and the two laughed, but you didn’t find it all that funny. Hearing that Somin trash talked Jungkook to his friends while working didn’t sound like the kind of person anyone would want to date. 
“Well she can talk shit all she wants, she’s just mad he’s moved on.” You defended, and are surprised to hear a quiet ‘thank you’ just for your ears as Jungkook tightened his hold briefly.
“I really dislike that girl,” Jin said, “I for one will be glad to not see her trashy ass around the apartment anymore. You are a breath of fresh air, Y/N.”
You smile shyly at Jin, enjoying how well everyone seemed to have welcomed you into their group.
“So, Y/N, we were just talking about the party Yoongi was throwing. He and Hobi live together, and they’re throwing a small rager this weekend. You’re coming with JK, right?”
Oh, this was not something you were expecting. You hadn’t gone to a party with co-workers in a long time…
“Um—”
“Of course she’ll be there, she’s coming with me. Right, babe?” Jungkook’s doe eyes looked up at you and you couldn’t say no. It’s not like you had plans anyways. You nodded and smiled at him, and he leaned into you, lips seeking yours in a quick kiss. You feel your body react to it, like it had been doing since this started, and pulled back before he could turn it X-rated. 
“Okay, seriously you two, get a room.”
Standing in the mirror in your bedroom, you turned from side to side to take in your outfit. As a head wardrobe stylist, you had a pretty good sense of fashion, but liked to stick to basic pieces and blacks, dressing up your look with delicate jewelry or layered pieces. 
Tonight was no different. With the beginnings of winter creeping in, you wanted to be comfortable in the weather once the sun set. You had on black sheer leggings that disappeared into a cute black skirt with thin white lines that had a revealing thigh split. Your top was an asymmetrical design, having one long sleeve and turning into a bandeau style on the other side. You paired it with black velvet boots that had crisp white laces, then finished the look with a matching set of simple dangling skinny diamond earrings, bracelet, and necklace. 
Despite this thing with Jungkook being fake, you wanted him to still feel proud to showcase you on his arm at this party. People were already talking about the two of you, and tonight would fuel the gossip even more. You were nervous of course, knowing who typically attended these types of parties, but Jungkook had assured you that he would keep you safe tonight.
The polite knock on your bedroom door had you turn your head to the sound, a tossed “come in” over your shoulder to who you thought was Yuna, but revealed a very handsome looking Jungkook, who was in his typical all black attire. You stood there, body warming as you took in his height, broad shoulders, and long legs. 
“Wow.” 
His voice was low, but his eyes looked like they sparkled as he took you in. 
“You don’t look too bad yourself, Jeon,” you responded, reaching to grab your bag off of your bed.
Jungkook snapped out of the daze he was in and pulled his phone out of his pocket. 
“Let’s take a photo for the ‘gram.”
You nodded; for a second you thought he wanted to have a photo of you because you looked good. Posing in the mirror, he pulled you close by your waist and adjusted his phone to capture both of you in the frame. He took a few photos, switching poses slightly each time.
“Hey,” he said, gaining your attention. You turned to him, shocked when his lips met yours. You melt easily into the kiss, hearing the camera shutter click several times as you tangled tongues, his hand sliding from your waist to cup your butt and pull you closer. You were unable to stop the moan from his action, and when he pulled away, lips a bit fuller and pinker from kissing, he quirked his eyebrow at you, paired with his signature smirk.
“Y-You messed up my lip gloss,” you fake huffed, turning away from him to rummage through your bag to grab your gloss and reapply. Your attempt to avoid him from seeing the way he affected you didn’t go unnoticed, but Jungkook kept quiet on it.
“It was worth it, these pics are hot. Plus, you taste good. What flavor is that?”
“Strawberry,” you mumbled, still feeling the heat from the kiss warm your neck and face.
“Strawberry is slowly becoming my new favorite.”
Yoongi and Hobi knew how to throw a party. The music was playing at the perfect level that you could still hear people talking to you, a variety of alcoholic beverages were supplied in ample amounts, and several games were being held in various rooms of their home. 
Currently, you were seated on the couch with a few other women from the office. Unfortunately, one of them was Somin. Across the room, your ‘boyfriend’ was engaged in a game of beer pong against Taehyung and Jimin. They had challenged him solo, citing he was good at everything and didn’t need a partner. As you watched him toss the small ping pong balls into the same cup, you knew their concern was right. 
“Y/N, you and Jeon?” Seline, one of the girls seated next to you, asked suggestively.
“Yea,” you giggled, the cup of something or other making you a little... giggly.
“Color me a little surprised. He’s like, such a social butterfly, and you’re...” 
“Oh, Y/N used to be a social butterfly, but she thought she was too good for us back in college.” Somin piped up. 
Her statement caught you off guard. Somin was once your best friend, but when she started dating Jungkook, she had distanced herself from you, not the other way around. 
“I never thought that. Some people act differently once they start dating people though. I never changed.” You sat back with a huff, crossing your arms. She ruined the buzz the alcohol had given you. 
Seline leaned closer to you, interested to hear more. The other’s seated nearby also tuned in with interest.
“Oh, you knew them in college?” 
You nodded, and Somin got up and walked away from the couch, seemingly annoyed at the attention you were getting for being Jungkook’s new girl.
You told the brief backstory of your friendship, leaving out the obvious part of losing virginities and finding out your best friend confessed to Jungkook when you were on your way to do the same thing, but ending it on good terms, saying that it was just the process of naturally growing apart. 
Seline nodded, and you saw her eyes widen as she looked past you. Following her gaze, your eyes narrowed at the view. Somin was all over Jungkook. You weren’t exaggerating; both of her hands were holding on to him as if she was too drunk to maintain her balance. She was falling into his arms and he was holding her, one of his large hands pushing her hair back from her face and a look of concern etched upon his own. 
Two feelings hit you at once. Nausea at the sight of him looking so tenderly at her, simultaneous with a boiling fury of jealousy that it wasn’t you. 
“Looks like Somin wants him back.” Seline snickered towards the other girls, and you stood up abruptly. You made eye contact with Jimin, who’s eyes were unnaturally large as he registered the scene before him.
Jimin was relieved that Somin interrupted the end of the game so that he could escape before he had to drink more, but he also felt annoyed seeing her all over Jungkook. Jimin had been glad when Jungkook told him and Tae that he was done with Somin; even more glad when he heard that Jungkook started seeing you. 
Back in college, Jimin was the only person, other than you and Jungkook, who knew what happened between you two. Both of you had confided in him your actions and feelings for one another. Color him surprised when he found out that Jungkook was not dating you, but instead your best friend, Somin. He wasn’t sure what happened but soon after, you stopped being around as much and Somin was around all the time. 
Watching Somin pretend to be too drunk to function and fall all over Jungkook made Jimin purposefully search the room for you. Watching you stand, drink clutched in your hand, Jimin had a feeling something was about to happen.
The drink you were nursing was downed in its entirety within a single swallow. You were now several drinks in, and you were feeling the alcohol start to hit as you stood up fast. Pushing your shoulders back, you walked over towards your ‘boyfriend’, whose back was turned towards you, and slid your arm around his waist.
“Heyyy babe,” you leaned into his body, staking claim on Jungkook as you stared daggers at Somin. She had taken a few steps back when you had approached, but now, seeing the challenge in your eyes, she stepped closer once more.
“Ggukk-ah, I don’t feel so well...”
“Min,” Jungkook stepped out of your hold, hands moving to cup Somin’s face as she feigned weakness in her knees. The level of concern in his voice let you know exactly how he felt. You scoffed, not believing Jungkook would behave this way in front of everyone. He was the one who had came up with this idea for ‘mutual benefit’ and here he was fucking it all up.
“She’s fine, babe. She can handle her alcohol.” You felt yourself growing hotter, the alcohol actually having an effect on you, as it always had. Your increasing body temperature only made you more frustrated.
“Seriously Gguk, I’m getting so hot...” Somin reached for the hem of her shirt, and in one fell swoop she had exposed the lacey bra she wore underneath. You could hear people talking over the sound of the music, taking in the scene of a shirtless ex making a brazen show.
“Jungkook!” Your voice is no more than a harsh whisper, but he’s so scandalized at Somin’s action, the protective boyfriend in him coming out to aid in shielding her body from onlookers, he doesn’t hear you. 
You hate the sick feeling bubbling in your stomach, unsure if it's from watching your ‘man’ flirt with his half naked ex or if it’s from the alcohol not sitting right with you.
Throwing the scene one last look, you turned on your heels and headed off to the kitchen for a bottle of water, or perhaps, another cup of something stronger.
Walking past him and Taehyung, Jimin caught sight of the look on your face before you blew past on your way towards the kitchen and he knew he should warn his friend.
“Jungkook, hey.. Jungkook!” Jimin yelled, his voice louder the second time he called his name. 
Jungkook had been leaning towards Somin, hands cradling her face as he continued to speak quietly to her. When he looked up at Jimin, his face appeared slightly annoyed at the interruption as he was taking care of her.
“What, bro?”
“Um, your girlfriend? Y/N? She just went into the kitchen and she looked a little upset.” Jimin said, his face trying to communicate to Jungkook what it looked like that he was holding his ex that way and his new girlfriend had stormed off. 
“Oh, for fuck’s sake. Jimin, can you?” Jungkook gestured his head towards the kitchen and Jimin thought his eyes were going to pop out of his head.
“How about I take Somin and you go find Y/N? Your girlfriend. Remember?”
Jungkook paused for a millisecond before depositing Somin into Jimin’s arms. He made his way to the kitchen, where he found you engaged in taking shots with Yoongi, Hoseok, and Jin, the latter of which was shit talking Somin with a smile. When you felt his presence enter the kitchen, you ignored him, gesturing for your now fourth shot in as many minutes.
Sensing the tension, Yoongi decided against more shots, instead leading Hobi and Jin out of the kitchen, much to Jin’s complaints of having to be around the ‘trashy tramp’. The three headed back to the party, a bottle tucked under Yoongi’s arm as Hobi carried the shot glasses out. 
“We were enjoying our new friend, JK. Stop keeping her to yourself,” Jin said with a drunken glare. 
Sighing audibly, you turned to walk out of the kitchen but Jungkook’s grasp on your wrist stopped you.
“Hey, why are you ignoring me like this?” He asked, confusion tinting his voice.
“Um, maybe because you’re supposed to be dating me and you were too busy with Somin to remember you even had a girlfriend.” You said back harshly, spitting the words at him with such vehemence you wobbled precariously on your heels.
“Come here.” Jungkook said, dragging you behind him through the bodies in the hallway until you had made it into one of the unoccupied back bedrooms. Shutting the door, he turned to you as he dragged his hand through his hair. The action only made him more handsome, tousled hair falling gently to frame his face.
“Look, it’s... complicated with Somin right now.”
“I get that you’re trying to teach her a lesson, see if you want to be with her or whatever, but not at my expense. You said mutually beneficial. Making me look like your second choice and embarrassing me does not benefit me.”
During your speech, you poked him in the chest several times, the alcohol starting to take its effect on you. Stumbling slightly, Jungkook caught you to steady you, keeping his hands on your waist. The warmness of his palms felt nice as he helped keep you balanced.
“You’re right, Y/N. I’m sorry. Like I said, it’s complicated. We dated for a long time. I still care for her. She’s... been making this difficult.”
“Oh? Difficult how? By faking being drunk so you can take care of her?”
“She’s a lightweight, that’s not fake,” he defended.
You were once close enough with Somin to know that she was not a lightweight, since she had been drinking at parties since she was 14; her earlier interaction was indeed, all an act.
“Whatever, Jungkook. So what is she doing that’s so difficult?” you asked, cutting him a look of narrowed eyes until he answered you.
He walked backwards, tugging you gently along until he was seated on the bed. You stood between his parted knees, waiting patiently for his answer. Realizing you weren’t going to drop it, he rubbed the back of his neck gingerly.
“She’s, you know.. She still texts me all the time, saying shit and sending pics and stuff. She says she wants me back, but I just,” he looked up at you, his doe eyes unable to hide his emotions.
“I don’t know if I believe it. I want to. But she’s hurt me, and I’m tired of it. I want her to feel how I felt.”
Your ire towards him faded as he opened up to you. Cupping his face gently, you leaned in and rubbed his nose with yours softly back and forth.
“You’re amazing Jungkook. Until tonight, you’ve treated me like a princess the entire week we’ve been dating. But she won’t learn if you give in. You’ve got me now, okay? When she texts you, text me instead. Don’t entertain her. She’ll think I’m not enough for you if you keep responding, and that doesn’t show her you can move on.”
You had sunk into him the whole time you talked to him, and he shifted your body so you were now straddled over his lap, head resting on his shoulder. You yawned sleepily, the loss of the anger leaving you feeling the tired effects of the alcohol. Unlike Somin, you were a lightweight, and 3 shots was over your limit.
As you got comfortable on Jungkook, he thought over what you said, smoothing your hair carefully.
“You’re right. You always were so smart in school... ” Jungkook said, and you nodded your head on his shoulder in agreement, humming an affirmative.
“Let’s get you home though, you’re halfway to passing out anyways.” Pulling out his phone, he ordered an Uber. He held you like that, your strawberry scent surrounding him until the Uber driver was outside. His hands gripping you under your thighs, he stood up and carried you out of the party, nodding bye to his friends and hosts of the party.
Placing you into the Uber, he climbed in after you and you curled into his lap, seeking his warmth in your drunken half-slumber. Jungkook chuckled, noticing the way his chest reacted to the action but ignored it. This was an arrangement, you seeking him out wasn’t real, and your anger earlier wasn’t jealousy, he told himself. You were worried about being embarrassed. He still loved and wanted to get back with Somin, right? 
As he looked down at you in his lap, enjoying the weight of you pressed against his body, he wasn’t so sure. 
“This the correct address, sir?” The Uber driver asked, verifying with Jungkook once he shut the SUV door.
“Yea, both of us are headed there.”
The weekend passed by fast. Waking up at Jungkook’s place Sunday morning had been a little shocking, but his bed was soft and clean, and smelled of him. You had snuggled deeper into the sheets until he woke you up to go get breakfast and get his car from Yoongi’s place. He detailed to you what had transpired to you being in his bed, expressed that he had not taken advantage of you, per rule number 7, plus the basic concept of consent, and promised to take you home as soon as Jin was awake and could take the two of you to go get his car. 
He gave you some clothes to change into, and while you weren’t surprised to find he had jeans to fit you, neither one of you asked or shared the obvious: they were Somin’s. At least the shirt he gave you was his, and you also stole a hoodie to wear. December may have only just started a week ago, but the cold was pervasive.
Breakfast with him was fun. Getting to know Jungkook again was just as exhilarating as it had been the first time, during that first year at BHSMA. He had changed, but in a good way. More mature, but still playful. An adult who was a hotshot photographer, but still humble and considerate. How someone could be built like that and have such a big soft heart was beyond you. 
The trip to get his car was slightly awkward, as Jin, Jungkook’s very nosy roommate, commented on how bad drunk sex must be with Jungkook if you were able to keep so quiet. 
“Somin was always so loud, I swear she was exaggerating. No one’s dick is that good; sorry JK.”
Once Jin dropped the two of you off at Yoongi and Hobi’s, it ended up turning into hanging out with them for a bit, talking about work and your relationship with Jungkook. Hobi swooned with oohs and ahhs while Yoongi cringed, faking disgust at such a cute story, as was his trademark. 
Jungkook apologized once the two of you escaped to his car, for both Jin being cringey, and for staying longer than anticipated with Yoongi and Hoseok, but you weren’t mad. You enjoyed meeting his friends and getting to know them. You were only a little concerned because Yoongi was also friends with Namjoon, who worked in the same department as him.
Jungkook turned to you before you climbed out of the car, not wanting to say goodbye just yet, but unable to think of a reason to get you to stay. Afterall, the relationship was fake. 
“Hey, thanks for your advice last night.”
“Honestly, I barely remember what it was, but if it helped you, I’m glad.” You smiled at him, and he had to blink a few times to remember what else he wanted to say.
“So, um—I was thinking we could go on, like, a formal date Monday? After work? Monday should be a chill day. I know the comeback is planned for January, so going out sooner than later is best, right? Get it out of the way? That way we won’t forget, and we won’t be too busy with work to try and squeeze it in, and—” 
Jungkook knew he was rambling, feeling nervous despite it being you, someone he had known for several years now. For fucks sake, he’s seen you naked. He felt his cock twitch and internally scolded himself. This was not the time for remembering the way you felt beneath him, the sweet sounds he had pulled from you as he learned your body, shared with you in giving each other your virginities. 
When his cock twitched again, he took a deep breath and tried to focus on your answer.
“You okay, Jeon?” you asked, noticing he had zoned out slightly.
“Yeah... ” he responded, shifting as if uncomfortable.
“Well, I said I would love to go on a date with you. What did you have planned?”
“It’s a surprise. Just dress for the weather.”
You nodded thoughtfully, a small smile gracing your face as you gathered your purse and stepped back out of the doorway of his car to shut it. He rolled the window down, smiling back at you.
“Can’t wait,” you say, standing outside his car on the sidewalk through the rolled down window, waving your fingers at him cutely.
Jungkook’s signature smile spread across his face as he winked at you just before he pulled off, turning his music up loud as he whipped his Benz out of your complex. 
Now sitting at your desk, you clicked through the selected shots that Jungkook emailed you of the photo shoot from last week as you reminisced on the weekend. You were supposed to be checking the outfits, detailing the different designers for the credits. But your thoughts kept drifting to Jungkook, and what should have easily been a 15 minute task took 45. 
Finally sending the email, you stood to stretch when a loud knock announced a visitor. Walking to the frosted door of your office, you opened it and revealed a large bouquet of tiger lilies. 
“Delivery for Y/N Y/L/N,” Kim, one of your assistants sing-songed as she walked into the room.
“Where did you get this? And why?” You searched the flowers until you found the card inside.
“I’m not supposed to give any details other than to read the note!” She pranced away, a smug smile on her face for knowing the secret you wanted to know.
Opening the envelope, a small polaroid fell out, fluttering to the ground. You picked it up, noting the image of a small park nearby. At the bottom, in Jungkook’s neat writing was a time. 2:30PM. Glancing at the clock, you see that the time listed is in roughly 15 minutes, so you gathered your purse, plucked a flower from the bouquet and headed out to meet Jungkook.
Walking into the elevator, Namjoon suddenly entered just before the doors shut, trapping you inside with him.
“Why are you avoiding me?” He asked. You studied him, momentarily at a loss for words at his ambush.
“Joonie, I—I’m not avoiding you. I’ve just been busy...”
“Too busy for your best friend? Jennie left me, and now I feel like I’m losing you too.”
Hearing his voice crack as he mentioned his ex hurts you more than you let him know. In all of the panic of the secret sex journal being released and fake dating Jungkook, you had forgotten what Namjoon had been going through.
“I promise, you’re not losing me, Joonie. You’re my best friend. I’m sorry that I haven’t been acting like it. I swear, I have been busy.”
“Yeah, busy going to parties with your new boyfriend. I saw him carrying your wasted ass out of Yoongi’s house.” Namjoon sounded a little irritated as he spoke.
“Listen, it’s complicated.. Can we talk about this later, please? It’s not a conversation for the elevator.”
“Okay, where are you going? I’ll go with you.” The doors opened and you both stepped out, Namjoon following you like a lifeline.
“Joonie, I—Look, I’m going on a date with Jungkook, I’m sorry!” you halted your steps and explained to him as a look of hurt flashed across his face.
“You know what? Forget it. Hit me up when you remember your best friend, if I’m even that.”
Namjoon walked away from you, ignoring you as you called after him. You sighed, giving up as he disappeared around a corner of the lobby, guests and coworkers looking at the exchange with interest.
You rubbed your temples and took a deep breath before braving the cold to walk to Ttukseom Park.
The walk was surprisingly pleasant. Despite the temperature, the sun was warm on your face whenever you were able to evade the shade along the sidewalk. It may have been the very beginnings of winter, but the scenery was anything but the cold melancholy you tended to associate with this time of the year.
The grass was vibrant still, and as you made it to the spot that matched the small photo you still had clutched in your hand, you noticed how the butterfly art installation along the wall of the J-Bug Cultural Complex glittered in the sunlight seeping in. Jungkook was seated on a bench right underneath the art with his trusty camera hanging from his neck, a picnic basket next to him.
“This is beautiful,” you said in awe, taking in the entire view. Jungkook followed your gaze, humming his agreement before picking up his camera. You heard the shutter of the camera several times. You looked over to him glancing at the small screen on the device before adjusting the lens and taking several more. 
“Have you never seen this?” He said as he stood and grabbed the basket. You stood as well and followed him, falling into step beside him as he walked out from the shade and into the grassier area.
You shook your head no. “Don’t really have the time I guess. I’ve always wanted to explore the J-Bug though; Namjoon said the museums all along the Hangang are amazing.”
“I’ve taken photos at several of the murals nearby, they’re some of my favorite locations actually.” He smiled at you, and you can’t help the way your heart squeezes. He nodded his head to an area that had a decent amount of sunlight to combat the winter chill.
“Yea, I remember seeing some of them in your office. You’re really talented Kookie, I remember how passionate you were about photography even back then.” You helped spread the blanket he produced from the basket and once seated you leaned back on your palms, eyes closed. 
Jungkook looked at you, taking in the way the midday sun made you glow, how pretty your lashes looked leaving shadows across your content cheeks. He couldn’t hold back the smile that took over his face upon hearing you use the endearment he hadn’t heard since that night so long ago.
“Ah, yeah, but my photography wasn’t that good then.”
“Stop being so humble, the photos you took were amazing, even then.”
You opened your eyes, catching him staring at you, and you felt yourself grow self-conscious.
“What? Is there something on my face?”
“Oh—uh, no sorry, it was just the sun—you know, lighting and all.” He gestured to his camera.
“Ah, I guess the talented eye never rests. Though I don’t know why you would want pictures of me,” you laughed and Jungkook tapped your knee in reproach.
“You’re a pretty good subject, don’t downplay yourself.”
You nodded, looking in the basket to hide the way your cheeks had warmed at his comment.
“Seriously, Y/N, I used to want to take photos of you all the time back then... you should’ve seen my camera roll. It was embarrassing. Jimin used to tease me all the time.” Jungkook helped you set up his small spread of food and you used the meal as a distraction.
“Ooh, did you prepare all of this?”
“Ah, some of it,” he rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. “I had some help from Jin hyung.”
“It smells delicious.” You took the proffered chopsticks from his large hand and dug into the bowl of japchae before placing it on your rice to gather for one bite; Jungkook followed suit.
The rest of the lunch date went incredibly well. Jungkook was just like you remembered him to be, except he was more filled out, and a little taller with a jawline that could cut glass. But his humor, his compassion, his deep thoughts that led you to fall for him all those years ago were still painfully there. Spending more time with him one on one did nothing but show you that the feelings you once had for him were still easily accessible. 
As he led you back to the office, his hand swinging yours between your bodies, you couldn’t help but wish this was real. How nice it would be to just pretend that Jungkook really was yours, allow those creeping feelings to spread like spring, blooming across your chest until it was vibrant and unforgettable. You couldn’t imagine what it would be like after; after when you were single again and Jungkook had either gotten back with Somin or moved on to someone else.
“What are you thinking about?” Jungkook squeezed your hand. You hadn’t even noticed that you were not only back at the office, but standing at the door to your locked office.
“Oh, sorry. Honestly, that lunch date was just so nice… It felt good to get out and do something different for a change.”
“Oh, well yea, I remembered you used to like stuff like this, I figured you probably still did.”
You nodded, hope blooming. 
“Take a look at this post, let me know if it’s okay.”
He handed you his phone, and you admired the way he had caught you off guard, a photo that looked like it could be moving, the way your hair frames your face as you looked longingly off into the distance. The caption was simple. “It’s not about where you go or what you have, it’s about who you’re with along the way.” 
“It’s perfect.”
“Okay, post it then. And post a few more pics of me on your page too? I’ve been posting and tagging you...”
If you didn’t know any better, you would think that Jungkook sounded… upset? You nodded as you clicked the post button, and as it loaded, the phone vibrated in your hand. Thinking it was a like or a comment on the image of you, you glanced at it. His phone had locked by this time, and instead of seeing notifications for Instagram, you saw a message notification instead. 
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Handing him back his phone, you push down that blooming sensation. It would be foolish to think Jungkook was upset that you hadn’t posted him as much as he had posted you. Clearly he must’ve spent time with Somin after he dropped you off yesterday. 
“You got a message. Umm, I’m gonna finish up here and then head home, you don’t need to wait for me. See you tomorrow?”
You wanted to get away from him desperately. Jungkook looked at you, confused at your sudden shift in mood.
“I thought I was driving you home? Jin said he was staying out late tonight, I figured we could hang out for a few—”
“We’ll see! There’s still so much to do for the album release.” You leaned up and kissed his cheek chastely before unlocking your office door and all but disappeared inside of it.
Jungkook stood there, staring at your closed door for a few more seconds before he felt his phone buzz in his hand. Checking his notifications, he saw a series of texts from Somin. 
Looking around confused, he noticed Somin standing across the office area, a deadly smirk on her face as she waved her phone at Jungkook. All Jungkook could do was sigh. Somin wouldn’t leave him alone long enough to sort out his thoughts, and now she was sending purposefully misleading texts? Jungkook didn’t know how to explain to you that what you saw was untrue.
You clearly believed it.
Jungkook gave you two days of space before he decided to track you down. He always hated that Somin would know he was upset (typically because it was her fault) and immediately pounce on him, forcing her company upon him and not allowing him the ability to forgive and move on. He wanted to give you that time, so after two days, Jungkook felt that it had been long enough, and the two of you should reconcile whatever misunderstanding there had been.
You posted a photo with him yesterday, and from the caption you wrote it appeared like you had a fun time with him on Monday despite the way you left him standing at your office door. 
The image you posted on your Instagram with Jungkook was a candid shot; he hadn’t realized you had taken a photo. While it brought about that warm feeling in his chest seeing the photo appear in his feed, it didn’t clearly depict his face. 
Instead, the focus was on your fingers intertwined. Jungkook’s profile could be seen, blurred from lack of focus, but it matched the caption you had chosen so well. “Even if someone shakes this world, please don’t ever let go of this hand you’re holding...”
Motivated, Jungkook made sure to be bright and early at your door ready to drive you and your sister. 
You weren’t expecting to see the flashy Benz outside of your apartment. Yuna was excited to not have to take public transportation, leaving you behind as she all but ran to the passenger rear door.
“Morning JK! We missed you these past few days.”
“Ah, sorry about that, I had to be at the office way earlier; didn’t want to make you guys wake up even earlier than you already do.”
Yuna waves off the apology and you finally followed; feet moving across the pavement until you’ve climbed into the car and buckled your seatbelt.
“Morning princess,” Jungkook says, leaning towards you and pecking your lips. You were caught off guard, not expecting him to be so lovey, but you returned the kiss, a double peck that you started and continued on as the traditional way you greeted each other.
“Morning.”
“Didn’t sleep well?”
“Yea, been a bit out of it these past few days...” You trailed off, not wanting to talk about it in front of Yuna. Catching on, Jungkook turns up the music and shifts into drive, pulling off towards the University for Yuna.
The drive to the office isn’t too long from the school, so once Yuna was out, Jungkook wasted no time in asking you to talk.
“So, can we talk about Somin?”
You huffed out a sigh. It was too early in the morning to deal with the Somin issue, but you nodded, allowing Jungkook to breach the topic.
“I know you saw her message. I want you to know that nothing happened. She sent that text because she saw us. She was doing the same bullshit she always does, part of the reason I don’t think she’s learned anything yet, like you said.”
You nodded, still not sure what to believe. He had no reason to lie to you, it’s not like you were actually in a relationship. He could go back to Somin anytime. 
“I hate that you’re mad at me.”
You turned your body towards him. 
“I—Look, I’m not mad, okay? Not at you. I just hate that Somin gets under my skin so much. That she’s a bitch to you. Neither of us deserve it, especially you.”
Jungkook reached over, encasing your hand in his.
“I’m learning that now. We’ve been together so long, I never noticed at first what she was doing. But I think subconsciously, it was making me resent her. And you really said some shit that had me thinking. And you’re right. I—I’m really glad to have you back in my life, Y/N. Having you in my corner has made all the difference.”
You looked down, eyes staring at the tattooed hand to hide the warmth on your face. 
“After work, come over. Let me buy us dinner and we can hang out.” You felt his smile as he stared at you while pausing at the red light before your office, and you met his gaze.
“Okay.”
“Good, we need to make Jin believe we’re having hot, loud sex, since rule 7 prevents you from experiencing the real thing.”
He let out a shout of pain as you punched his shoulder.
Walking to get food was not the smartest idea for 3 reasons. First, because neither of you checked the weather. Second, due to number one, neither of you had an umbrella. So naturally, third, running in the rain while carrying takeout was almost a disaster.
And still, the two of you laughed the entire way, bag clutched in one arm while your fingers were intertwined between your sprinting bodies, one block left to get to Jungkook’s apartment. By the time he’s unlocked the door, you're both sopping wet, rain water dripping onto the floor of the entryway to the apartment. After getting the food situated to stay warm while you guys got cleaned up, Jungkook gave you a towel and led you to his bathroom.
You appreciated that he was such a clean guy, his apartment and subsequently, the bathroom was pristine, and he actually had a trashcan and stocked toilet paper, unlike some men you knew. He planted folded clothes for you to change into on top of the sink counter, and surprised you with a kiss.
“What was that for?” You asked, dazed.
“Practice.” He said with a wink, and he backed away, closing the door as he left you alone. 
While Jungkook showered, you heated up the food, your mostly dried hair now up in a messy bun as you danced around his kitchen. His sweats were a little (a lot) too long, so you had rolled them up so you could avoid tripping. 
A knock at the door made you jump, before you moonwalked over to the entryway, now clean of the rain water the two of you had trudged in. Thinking it was Jin, you didn’t check to see who it was and opened the door. You froze as you took in a young man that was not your ‘boyfriend’s’ broad shouldered roommate. Instead, doe-eyes similar to the man currently naked in the shower stared back at you.
“Oh, hey… I thought my brother lived here. Sorry about that!” The man stepped back, checking the number on the apartment again before his eyes landed on your shirt—or rather, his brother’s shirt.
“You’re not Somin...”
“Hi, and no, I’m not,” you laughed, “um, but this is Jungkook’s apartment.”
“Ahh, okay. I’m JungHyun. His older brother.”
“Oh! Come in!” You stepped back so that he could walk past you, and you led him into the living room once he had shed his shoes. 
“Oh, did I interrupt dinner?”
“Oh, no we haven’t even started eating yet. No worries.”
The two of you sat down, and you tucked your feet up under your bottom, turning to face Jungkook’s older brother.
“So, I know who you’re not...”
“Oh, fuck, manners.” The look on your face is sheepish, and you smiled to cover your nerves. “I’m Y/N, Kookie’s girlfriend.”
“Oh, you’re the famous Y/N! Finally got you, did he?”
His words confused you, Jungkook had been with Somin since forever, when had he ever wanted you? Smiling to cover your confusion, you’re saved when Jungkook appears in the hallway, a loud laugh as he barreled over to his brother and all but jumped on the man.
“Hyung! What are you doing here?!”
“Oh, I finished that project at work early, so I’m headed to visit mom and dad. Staying with them through Christmas before the next contract at work starts.”
“Ah, it’s good to see you!”
Jungkook’s enthusiasm is abundant; it’s clear he loves his brother dearly and misses him. He pulled back from a hug and sat comfortably in the space between you and JungHyun, his palm resting lightly on your leg absentmindedly.
“So, I’ve met your new girlfriend. I must say you didn’t do her justice when you described her to me.”
You felt the blush creep across your face, and Jungkook also seemed to turn red, his fingers rubbing at the skin on his neck.
“Yea, seeing her in person is best.” He says awkwardly, and you can’t help but laugh.
“So? Does dad know? Mom is gonna be so excited. She hated Somin.”
“What?” Jungkook says at the same time that you say “Really?”
JungHyun nodded, sitting back into the couch comfortably.
“Yea, no offense, lil bro, but Somin was a bitch. Mom thought she was so fake.”
“Wh-why didn’t you guys ever say anything?”
“Eh, you know, cause you were in love or whatever.”
You get up and go to the kitchen, grabbing bowls and the last of the heated food, hoping to avoid being present for this part of their conversation, but still curious all the same.
“Definitely not.”
“Mmhmm, sure.”
“Seriously. I wasn’t actually in love. Or if I was, it faded. I think for a lot of it I was just… dependent or whatever. I thought it was love, sure. But it wasn’t; I know that now.”
“Ah, so Y/N showed you what love is?”
“She definitely cares more about me and my happiness than Somin ever has.”
You cleared your throat as you walked back into the living room.
“Ready to eat?”
Dinner with Jungkook and JungHyun is, in so many words, fun. They bantered and joked and you spend the time eating and laughing, enjoying your time with the brothers. You didn't even realize how late it had gotten, not until Jin waltzed into the apartment, noting the late hour for you all to be chatting so loud. 
“Shit, Yuna messaged me an hour ago.” 
“Just stay here. We can pick Yuna up in the morning when you go home to change.”
“Are you sure? Your brother’s visiting, I don’t want to be in the way.”
“Y/N, don’t worry, I’ll take the couch. I was going to anyway.” JungHyun smiled at you, and you nodded back. Standing up, you stretched, not realizing how tired you were. Jungkook took the opportunity to tickle your exposed sides, and you squealed, causing the brothers to laugh as you squirmed away from Jungkook, who didn’t let you get far.
“Let’s get you to bed, princess.”
Turning in Jungkook’s arms, you looked over his shoulder at his brother.
“Good night, oppa.”
Jungkook stiffened as JungHyun and Jin laughed, enjoying the way the youngest one reacted to your words.
“Ah, if it doesn’t work out between you two, hit me up.”
“Hyung!” Jungkook glared at his brother, not enjoying the joke.
“What? At least she wouldn’t need to meet our parents twice! She is coming for Christmas, right?”
The two of you looked at each other, a little thrown off by the question. The holidays were coming up, but you hadn’t discussed this far into the relationship. It wasn’t real after all, did you have to go through such lengths to teach Somin a lesson?
“I haven’t told mom and dad yet about her...”
“No worries, I text them ages ago. They’re expecting her for Christmas.”
Jungkook sighed, dropping his forehead to yours, so all you could see was his eyes staring into yours.
“Is this okay? Do you wanna, you know? Meet my parents?” Jungkook’s voice was low as he whispered the question.
“I—Yes.”
The look on his face when you agreed was beautiful, a scrunched-nose smile that is reminiscent of a bunny. You couldn’t help but smile back, lost in the mahogany of his eyes.
“Are you guys over there kissing when I’m waiting for an answer?” JungHyun broke the tension filling the air between you and his brother.
Jungkook smirked before capturing your lips with his own, a breathless kiss that lasted only a couple seconds before he pulled away to smirk at his brother.
“You can tell mom and dad I’ll be bringing her home for Christmas.” With those words, Jungkook whisked you down the hall and tucked you into his bed before climbing in behind you. Wrapping his arm around your waist, he pulled you closer to him. His hands skimmed your body before he began tickling you again, a squeal leaving your mouth. You retaliated, hands attempting to tickle him before he pinned you to the bed, and the two of you began to wrestle for a bit. 
You were unaware of how sexual the wrestling sounded; his headboard hitting the wall roughly and the two of you grunting and groaning as you fought for dominance, some added squeals and moans when Jungkook decided it was a good idea to bite you in his quest for submission. Finally winded, you gave in, laying back on the mattress in defeat. Jungkook tugged at your sweatpants, removing them swiftly and throwing them onto the floor, his own joining the pile. He then grasped your face, peppering it with kisses.
You were about to ask him what he was doing, when someone knocked. Jungkook called out a ‘come in’ and his brother walked into the bedroom, his sights set on the bathroom.
“Don’t mind me, just gonna wash up before bed. It seemed safe to enter now.”
He disappeared into the bathroom as Jungkook continued to hold you, affectionate even after his brother was out of sight. Even if this relationship was fake, you could pretend in this moment that it was real, that Jungkook pulled you closer, not to fool his brother, but because he wanted to be close to you, that he was falling in love with you. 
For one night, it should be okay to pretend it was something more, right?
The next two weeks passed by in a blur. Namjoon had basically confined himself to his studio at work, intent on avoiding you. Seeing you hand in hand with Jungkook seemed to bother him, and because you couldn’t tell him the truth (or wouldn’t), you left him to his own assumptions. He ignored all of your texts attempting to reach out to him, despite him saying he wanted you to let him know when you had time for him. This just made you more frustrated, and you were done trying to chase Namjoon, romantically or otherwise. When he was ready to behave like an adult, you would be willing to talk to him. 
After telling Yuna about how you were asked to go home with Jungkook and meet his family, you received a call from your own parents. Yuna had told them about Jungkook, and you were bombarded with questions until you too agreed to bring Jungkook home.
It took some discussing, but it was finally decided: the 23rd and Christmas Eve would be with your family, and Christmas Day and the 26th would be with Jungkook’s. You were a little worried that the parents would be able to see through your ruse, despite having fooled everybody else at work, but Jungkook assured you that it would be easy enough to trick his parents. 
On the train ride to Daegu, you sat a few rows away from your sister, who had her headphones in as she watched the latest K-Drama she missed due to her busy school schedule. The ‘arriving soon’ message plays throughout the cabins of the KTX, and you figure it’s important to bring up your parents. 
Turning to Jungkook, who was drawing on his iPad, you removed an airpod from your ear, pausing the music. You take a moment and admire his face, the way his jawline was so angular, the sharp planes of his cheekbones, the concentration held in his eyes.
“Like what you see?” Jungkook’s voice is teasing, but you still felt embarrassed at being caught staring at him.
“I just think we should talk about the next 2 days.”
“Y/N, listen. Parents love me. Despite the tattoos and long hair.”
“Cause you’ve met so many parents? You’ve been dating Somin since we were 20.”
“My friends have parents too, you know. Don’t worry. Just be like we always are and it’ll be fine.”
“Your parents may be easy to trick, but mine? They’re a bit more… scrutinizing. Plus, they’ve heard me talk about Namjoon, and probably don’t remember me talking about you...” you trailed off, a slight warmth subtly coloring your cheeks.
“So you used to talk about me?”
“Well, yea, first year, you know? I had a crush on you, so my mom heard all about it. Not about—you know, but I told her I thought we might date.” You buried your nose in your phone to avoid looking at Jungkook. 
“You know, you never told me why you nev—”
Jungkook’s words were cut off by an attendant walking through the aisle, asking everyone to start packing up their belongings as the train would be pulling into the DongDaegu Station momentarily.
“My dad should be here to pick us up—Yuna!” Your sister turned to you, a smile on her face as she waved her phone.
“Dad’s here!”
The drive to the house was short, and you spent most of the time taking turns with Yuna filling in your dad on your life in Seoul. Your mom was busy in the kitchen when you arrived, and she shooed you all upstairs to your rooms. Unsurprisingly, your parents were having you and Yuna share her room while Jungkook would be across the hall in your room. 
Your parents were more conservative, and while you were an adult and perfectly able to do as you pleased in Seoul, while under their roof, they wanted to make sure that you remained as pure as they could keep you. 
Dinner that first night went well. Jungook and your dad bonded over sports, despite Jungkook not playing any team sports, he was still well-versed on the topic and joined your dad in watching a basketball game while you, Yuna, and your mom cleaned up after dinner and then sat in the sewing room. 
Your mom asked you all about Jungkook, which she surprisingly did remember you talking about. It seemed you had her and your father fooled, but while you sat at her embroidery machine, she shared she was confused about the lack of presents you had for each other to open tomorrow night. Saying it was because you still had to wrap them and she would find them under the tree tomorrow was an easy enough excuse, and paired with a very real yawn, you excused yourself to get ready for bed.
Sleeping with Yuna was uncomfortable; she was a wild sleeper. Restlessness won over sleep, so you got out of bed and made your way downstairs to grab a bottle of water from the kitchen. Your parents were already in bed in their first floor room on the other side of the house from the kitchen and the stairs.
When you returned back upstairs, you noticed the light on in your bedroom, so you knocked softly.
“Come in,” Jungkook’s voice was subdued, and you pushed the door open gently.
“Hey,” you said, eyeing Jungkook’s lean, topless form as he sat at the edge of the bed. You never tired of the view when you would sleep over at his place. 
“Can’t sleep?”
“Yea, Yuna isn’t the best person to sleep next to, flops around all night, hogs the sheets.”
You walk into the room, joining him on the bed. He’s swiping through images from the SeoulM8 shoots he’s recently done. You watched his finger move across the iPad leisurely.
“Ahh, sounds like you miss sleeping next to me.”
You scoffed, shoulder bumping into his.
“You snore a bit. And your body temperature runs pretty hot. I wake up sweating half the time.”
“Ah, not the first time I’ve made you sweat, love.”
You raise your eyebrow at his insinuation of your loss of virginity.
“Kidding, babe,” he jokes, locking his iPad and setting it down to charge on the bedside table.
“Can we go into town tomorrow? I want to do some last minute shopping.”
“Sure.” Jungkook yawned and you took that as your cue to leave so he could get some sleep after your journey across the country.
“Where ya going? I thought you couldn't fall asleep with Yuna?”
Jungkook pulled the covers back, making space for you to climb in in front of him.
“Well, yes, but my parents—”
“Sleep downstairs and wholly expect us to pretend to sleep apart but know that you’re going to sneak in here anyways because we’re madly in love.”
You had to cover your mouth to keep from laughing loudly.
“And how do you know that?”
Jungkook smirked, still waiting for you to get into bed.
“You’re dad told me. He also said we need to give him grandchildren, sooner rather than later.”
Stunned silent, Jungkook leaned forward and grabbed your wrist, pulling you towards him. He turned off the light and you climbed in over him, keeping him at the front just in case. 
“C’mere,” he rolled over and pulled you to his chest, snuggling into you as he got comfortable. “We have to look madly in love. No funny business though. I know you think I’m irresistible, but we are in your parents house and must be respectful.”
You elbowed him in the rib, and settled into the comforting darkness of your childhood bedroom with Jungkook’s arm wound around your waist, holding you close. 
——
Christmas Eve, in your family, is the night that presents are opened. As a child, this tradition was done in order to make room under the tree for Santa’s presents. As adults, your parents keep the tradition alive, instead putting stockings with 1 or 2 of the more expensive gifts for you to have on Christmas morning. 
After shopping in town and spending time wrapping, you had finally placed a few gifts for Jungkook under the tree that Yuna was now passing out. You were surprised to see a couple gifts for you from Jungkook in the small pile you amassed, and when you caught his eye, he winked at you. 
Yuna opened her gifts first, then you and Jungkook, where you saw that he gave you a matching jewelry set: necklace and earrings in a soft rose gold, a small cherry blossom bloom dangling from the small hoop of the earrings and from a small hoop on the necklace. It reminded you of your date at the park. The two of you sat under the winter sakura tree that day, the only blossoms that bloom twice a year, where you told him how much you loved cherry blossoms in passing. 
“It’s beautiful, Jungkook.” You almost can’t believe it, but he just smiles softly at your gratitude and helps put the necklace on you. Your parents looked happy, enjoying seeing their daughter so happy. Jungkook was excited to see what you had gotten him; a special lens for his camera that he had talked on and on about purchasing soon. He was giddy, running upstairs to grab his camera, testing out the new lens on pictures of you and your family.
Once again, you found yourself in your old room, curled up with Jungkook, but this time you were unable to sleep. Rolling over, you faced Jungkook, who cracked one eye and peeked at you.
“What’s wrong, babe?” he asked, voice laced with sleep. You noticed how easily the endearment rolled off his tongue even with no one around to convince.
“I—the gift you got me,” your fingers fidgeted with the small cherry blossom on the necklace. “I hope it didn’t cost too much. You can return it once we break up if you need to.”
“Y/N, that gift is for you. For being such a great… friend. Helping me do this. I really think it’s working.”
“You deserve to be happy Jungkook. I’m glad you were able to get space long enough to work out how you feel, and that you’re working your way to being happier.”
“Yea, I think I’ve been much happier lately...”
You watched his tongue run along his lips, and you couldn’t help but train your eyes on the movement. He caught your eyes, his hands gripped you a bit tighter as the tension in the dark room grew.
“...much happier...”
You weren’t sure who moved first, you or Jungkook, but at that point, it didn’t really matter. The way your lips sought his, the way his hands pulled you closer, the two of you were acting on instinct. This kiss wasn’t for practice or for show, who was to know what happened here, in this room tonight, but the two of you?
You let out a moan as he dipped his head lower, tracing kisses from your neck to what was exposed of your collarbone. His touch is impatient, tugging and kneading, unable to stay still on your body. His scent alone, a musky vanilla scent, engulfed your senses and you wanted… more.
You threw your leg over his body, turning the two of you until you’re straddled on top of him, able to press your core down onto his very firm cock. His boxers and your sleep shorts are the only things holding it back from assaulting you, and you’re annoyed that they’re in the way. Reaching down, you slide your hand roughly into the waistline of the boxers, fingers gripping him.
Jungkook groaned into your neck, the feel of your hand as you palm him building the craving he had for you. He wanted you. Not just physically. But you had those stupid rules, and he couldn’t just break them. He respected you more than that, and falling in love with you? Well that wasn’t part of the plan.
Jungkook slows the way he’s kissing you, slows the way he was thrusting into your hand and pushes you gently off of him and back to your side of the bed. You’re both panting, barely able to catch your breath as he pulled your back to his chest and held you close.
“We’ve got a long trip tomorrow morning to Busan, babe. Let’s get some sleep.”
“Oh… okay?” You were so confused. You had never been turned down before, especially not when you were so far into the act, practically ready to pull your panties to the side and ease him into you. You were throbbing, body aching with want, and you knew he was too; could feel the hardness as it nestled in the dip between your cheeks.
You felt him kiss your head, followed by a soft double peck to your neck, and not 10 minutes later his breathing slowed as he drifted off to sleep. 
You, on the other hand, laid awake, thoughts running wild.
——
Christmas morning you had an early breakfast with your family before opening stockings. Your parents had only a couple of weeks to prepare for Jungkook, but they had prepared a stocking for him as well; your mom embroidering his name onto it and stuffing it full to the brim. 
You were surprised at the gifts; a couple boxes of polaroid film, a bag of banana kick chips, individually packaged egg snacks, and colorful candy canes. Yours were similar as well, a small collection of sewing items for designing, and your favorite snacks. Your mom ruffled Jungkook’s sleepy-head hair as he offered his thanks to your parents, and you couldn’t help but feel your heart swoon at the sight. You realized something heartbreaking at that moment: breaking up with Jungkook once this was over would hurt more than just you. 
Heading to Jungkook’s parents house was a different experience after the previous night. Yuna had obviously stayed with your parents, and would be catching the train back the same day you left Busan. 
This was the first time the two of you had been alone since the rejection the night before, and you were doing your best to ignore the hurt feeling that would bloom every time you caught yourself dwelling on it. You focused on your phone instead, posting a few photos on Instagram so that you were sticking to your end of the deal. Somin would see these posts some way or another, and it would hopefully do what it was intended to.
Jungkook didn’t seem to think twice about the rejection, wrapping his arm around your shoulder and treating you like you were really together, a true couple going to meet his parents for the first time. 
“Nervous?”
“A little. I’ll be meeting your parents, and we’re not really together,” you looked down at your hands, missing the way Jungkook’s face fell for a few seconds before working it’s way back to a smile, though it didn't quite reach his eyes.
“I think we’re together enough where it counts. No one watching us would doubt it,” he intertwined your fingers and gave it an encouraging squeeze, “sometimes even I forget you’re not my real girlfriend.” He laughed, and the sound leaves an ache in your chest.
“Same, haha...” You looked out the window of the KTX, ready to breathe the fresh air of the nearby sea. Jungkook released your hand and you both went back to your tasks, Jungkook reading emails and you sketching designs for work.
Jungkook’s parents treated you much like yours had treated Jungkook. Like you were the greatest thing to happen to their child.
“Y/N, you’re so pretty! Oh, thank heavens, we have a chance at cute grandchildren now.” Jungkook’s mom bowed her head in thanks to a higher power, and you couldn’t help feeling a little bad that you weren’t actually dating Jungkook. You would have liked to deserve the praise she was giving you.
“He looks so much happier, happier than we’ve seen him in a long time.” She smiled at his father and their eyes, so similar to their two sons, crinkled in the corners. JungHyun greeted you with a hug, and you reciprocated it.
“Hi, Oppa,” you teased, and Jungkook glared at you. 
“Yah! That’s Jeon JungHyun to you,” he leaned closer to your ear in a mock whisper, “only I get called Oppa.”
JungHyun cringed back in mock disgust.
“I do not need to know about your ‘Oppa kink’ in the bedroom.” He shivered as he walked back to the living room, where he put away his laptop to make space for gifts.
Their dad, who you were very glad had not heard his eldest son’s comment, gestured to you to leave your suitcases in the entryway and come sit down.
“Kookie, pass out the gifts please. Your mom has been waiting all morning in excitement for you two to get here. We can have lunch after you guys get situated.”
Jungkook, ever the dutiful youngest son, began to distribute gifts amongst you all, while you handed your own gifts that you had gotten for his family out to them. 
“You didn’t have to get them anything,” Jungkook whispered as he dropped a gift off for you from his own parents.
You gave him a pointed look, gesturing subtly to the gift.
“I did.”
He shook his head with a smile and continued until the space under the tree was empty.
“So, we just open them all at the same time! Save your thanks for the end, ready?” His dad looked at you, and you nodded.
“Let’s get it!” Jungkook shouted, and everyone laughed at his phrase as you began to open your gifts. You didn’t have many, one from his parents and JungHyun, and 2 from Jungkook. His family had given you a Pantone Color Swatch book that was easy to carry around, to help while on set working. It was very thoughtful, and you knew it could not have been cheap. You bowed deeply, on your knees and forehead to their floor as a show of your gratitude and respect.
They motioned for you to sit back up, waving off your thanks as if it was no big deal for them to get this gift for you. You turned to Jungkook’s gift, eyes already threatening tears at their sincere treatment of you, and once opened, you did cry.
Nestled inside a satin lined box was a beautiful set of Dwikkoji, traditional hair pins, that came with a small card identifying them as from the Joseon era.
“Jungkook!” you gasped, sure that they couldn’t be real.
“Don’t worry. I didn’t have to pay for them. But they would look much better displayed in your office as our head fashionista then collecting dust in storage.”
You couldn’t hold back your feelings any longer. Acting on instinct, you tugged him towards you, wrapping your arms under his own and around his frame as you let your tears fall.
“They’re beautiful, Kookie.” 
Jungkook reciprocated your embrace, his hand smoothing down your hair as his parents smiled at the scene in front of them.
“Ah, young love, remember when that was us?”
Unlike your parents, who wanted to pretend that the two of you were a modest young couple, Jungkook’s parents assumed that the two of you would room together. His dad had clapped him on his shoulder and congratulated him on bringing home such a fine woman. Apparently in the two weeks that JungHyun had been home, he had raved about you to his parents, showing pictures from your social media accounts of the two of you together, as well as your fashion talent. Jungkook too had talked on the phone to his parents, you came to find out, which was why his parents were so enthralled by you, despite only dating Jungkook for a short time.
Lunch was fun. Spending time with the Jeons was full of laughter. His family was like him, generous and kind hearted, and you enjoyed spending time with his mom in the kitchen making cookies for dessert.
That night you went out for a drive to look at Christmas lights, before you all stopped off at the town center where they had outdoor ice skating set up. Jungkook had his camera with the new personalized strap you made him (yay fashion classes!) around his neck, taking photos of you and his family as you glided across the frozen water. You spent an hour there before heading home to warm up with hot cocoa and Christmas movies. You found out that this was their tradition every year, and it made you happy to know they wanted to share it with you. Even if it was only for this one Christmas.
Having showered first, you traveled down the hall to get water from the kitchen while you waited for Jungkook to finish his. His family had a one level house; His parents’ room was located on one side of the living room and kitchen, while Jungkook and his brother’s room was on the other side. 
You heard his parents talking at the table and you slowed down, resting the back of your head on the wall as you heard them say your name.
“Oh, honey, Y/N is so darling! I haven’t seen him this happy in years.”
“He looks so in love with her.”
“Well, remember, he used to have the biggest crush on her.”
“But that was years ago. They were what, 20? And somehow he chose Somin?”
“Sometimes, people aren't ready. Now, they’re older. Better chances of them working out. Oh, honey, I hope they work out. She would be such a cute daughter in law.”
“I know, but don’t pressure them. Let them realize how in love with each other they are on their own.”
“Do you think she loves him too?”
“I don’t have a single doubt in my mind. I saw the way they were together.They’re in love, whether they realize it or not.”
“Ahh, so we could have grandchildren soon? JungHyun seems like he’s never going to settle down... ”
“Aish, grandchildren? I’m too young to be a grandpa!”
Instead of interrupting them, you headed back to his room, mind racing with their words. Jungkook had a crush on you? They thought the two of you were in love? Daughter in law? Jungkook chose that moment to come into the room, towel wrapped low around his waist as he checked his phone and you couldn’t look away.
“You’re starting to drool there, babe.”
You swallowed and looked away, grabbing your hair and running your fingers through it to put it into a bun on your head.
“I just uh—I wanted to talk to you about the contract.”
Jungkook, who was facing his dresser where his suitcase was opened up, froze. His eyes sought yours in the mirror, his reflection giving away nothing.
“Oh? What, uh, what about it?”
“Well, our parents seem to like us together, I mean, they’re talking about grandkids, and well, I would hate to break up so soon after having met them. I know this was only supposed to go on until you figured out what to do about Somin, but if it’s alright with you,” you look away, twisting your fingers in nervousness, “I would like for us to continue to date.”
Jungkook’s mind was racing. He understood what you meant. Your parents seemed to love him, discussing future visits for the holidays and his family had been no different. And thinking about ending the contract? Well, he had already been thinking about doing that. So he could date you, for real. Somin texted him while he was in the shower, upset about missing Christmas with his family. Jungkook thought that it would bother him, his first holiday without her, but he realized he couldn’t care less. 
Somin treated him like a prize to be toted around and shown off. He was good for bragging; his face, body, high paying job, it all granted her status. She had no ambition to grow within the company, still a one act manager after graduating as an interning manager’s assistant. But you? God, you were different. You had ambition, you didn’t care about what Jungkook could provide for you, and you listened to him, to his dreams. You were thoughtful, appreciative, and everything you had done was to help him be happy. Even fake dating, while it benefitted you as well, you had gone above and beyond for him.
You stood up, walking closer to him where he was lost in his thoughts.
“Jungkook?” you intoned, your fingers softly settling on the back of his shoulder, waiting for his response.
“I think, yeah. I think that would be a good idea. My parents and brother love you.”
Your heart soared. He wanted to continue this. Not go back to Somin right away. He barely brought her up this whole trip. You felt giddy, hopeful that maybe one day, this could be something more.
“So then, it’s settled.”
Jungkook turned around, catching your hand before you could drop it back to your side.
“I think we should reexamine that contract, but tonight, I’d really like to say fuck it.”
Jungkook stepped into your space, and in a heart’s beat, he had ensnared your lips, his arms pulling you closer to him. Your own arms snaked up his body, hands pulling his head closer to you, your fingers playing with the wet strands at his nape. His kisses were fervent, lips almost rough as he pressed them to yours before he was swiping his tongue across the opening of your mouth, seeking entrance. 
You groaned as you arched your back, seeking to deepen the kiss as you pressed higher on your tiptoes, wanting more of him. His palm skimmed your back down to your butt, where he applied pressure and lifted you with brute strength. You pulled away with a gasp, not expecting to be lifted up. He just looked at you with pupils blown, one eyebrow raised suggestively as he carried you to his bed.
“I think we should practice making ‘grandchildren’ for them.”
He set you down, long enough to grip the hem of your shirt before he pulled it over your head. His eyes moved to your chest, and he closed his eyes as he sighed in defeat.
“You’ve been keeping this from me?”
“You’ve seen me naked before,” you remind him, but he just shook his head.
“Years ago, Y/N, and let me tell you, my memory didn’t do you justice. I think I need a reminder.”
You throw him a suggestive look, knowing that you’ve both had some experience with sex since your shared first time all those years ago. This time, there was no fumbling, no nervous laughter, or apologizing. This time, Jungkook was in command of his body, and of yours too. He rid you of your shorts, leaving you naked on his sheets as he dropped his towel. 
You marveled at how his body had changed: the muscle gained and the chiseled jaw you loved to admire. Jungkook bit his lip and did the same to you, eyes roving along your curves, the way you weren’t shying away from his touch as his fingers trailed up your thigh.
“You’re beautiful, Y/N.”
You didn’t get a chance to respond, as Jungkook kissed you again, this time with less fervor, his body crawling above yours as he joined you on the bed. His hands touched you everywhere, fondling your breasts and your ass as he kissed down your neck, nipping the skin and leaving marks along your neck. You feel the ache as your wetness pools between your legs, and Jungkook’s growing member sits heavy where it’s pressed against your thigh. 
“Jungkook, please—”
He nips a bit harder, the sound of you begging for him made him infinitely larger. He wanted to be in you, but he didn’t want to rush it, wanted to savor you for as long as he had you under him. Kissing down your body, his tongue leaves a cool, wet trail and you writhe, ticklish to his tongues path to your core. 
Parting your legs wider, he smirked at you from where he's sat on his knees, your thighs on either side of his gloriously naked body. Leaning forward, he never breaks eye contact as you watch his lips meet your mound. Gentle kisses pressed to your lips, and then his tongue is parting them, flicking your clit in greeting. Your head is thrown back, you know you should be quieter, but the onslaught of his lips and tongue as they pleasure your sweet spot has you reduced to base instincts only. And right now, they want Jungkook to know that he had better not stop.
You rolled your hips, seeking more, and he gives in, thick fingers immersing themselves inside of you. You clench, walls shocked at the intrusion but welcoming it all the same. He felt so good, and you tell him as much, so he continued to finger fuck you as he lapped up your release, carrying you through your orgasm.
He was so hard, cock throbbing as he kissed back up your body, and after spitting into your hand, you reached down to stroke along his shaft, palm twisting and gliding as he nuzzled his face back into your neck, quiet little moans rolling out of his mouth with each stroke. You made him feel so good, your body warm and soft as your smaller hand stroked his larger ego, in more ways than one.
Without preamble, you positioned him at your opening and lifted your hips, allowing him to feel how warm your walls were, waiting for him. He pushed up on his palms on either side of your head and the look he gave you was indecipherable before your own eyes shut; he engulfed his cock in the swollen velvet that was your cunt, buried to the hilt.
He had tried his best to prepare you, but every glorious inch stretching you out was a breath you needed to take in order to grow accustomed to his size. You counted nine breaths, then opened your eyes, taking in the trembling of his arms as he held himself back from pounding into you.
“Move, Kook, please,” you whine, and he wasted no time following your orders.
His hips grinded into you as he rolled them, angling himself to take you as deep as humanly possible. His pace started off fast, but soon he was slowing down, head dropped into the crook of your neck as your nails dragged red marks down his back. You rocked your hips in time to his thrusts, using your grip on his back as leverage to meet him halfway. 
“You feel so good, so wet for me,” he murmured with each thrust, and you bit his shoulder, afraid if you didn’t gag yourself, you would say the wrong thing.
Everything about you enveloped him, your scent, your arms and thighs that were holding him close; he could barely think straight as he tried to get you to cum again before he got himself off. But you felt so good, tight clenches as your arousal gushed and coated his cock, he didn’t know how much longer he could last. Then you bit his shoulder, and he sped up his stroke, hips rolled in fast succession as your body jostled underneath him.
“Fuck, fuck, I’m so close baby,” you mewl into his ear, and he lifted his head up out of your neck, resting his forehead on yours. 
“I want to watch you, don’t close your eyes,” he pleads and you try your best to keep them open, not closing them for long as the coil builds in your lower abdomen. He adjusted your bodies, lifted your legs up slightly which allowed him a deeper angle that hits your g-spot. Your mouth hangs open, a fucked out expression on your face and Jungkook loses it.
The first spurt of his hot cum sends you over the edge, and you're spiraling down, pussy contracting around his cock, milking him for every drop. You maintain eye contact, watching each other for a few seconds before you can’t help but close them, the pleasure too great.
Jungkook pressed his lips to yours as you both cum, using them to cage in the words he wanted to say, wanted to shout from the rooftops, but wasn’t yet sure you felt the same way.
——
Waking up in Jungkook’s arms, you felt sore. So sore, but also satisfied. You hadn’t slept this well in ages, and if Jungkook’s deep slumber and dead weight arm draped over your waist was anything to go by, he hadn’t either. You moved his arm slowly, headed for the shower, and let out a small gasp as JungHyun also exited his bedroom at the same time.
“Well, don’t you look... rested,” he trailed off, a look of knowing on his face.
Your face burned in embarrassment.
“Don’t worry, as soon as I heard little brother start to get a little… feral, I turned up my TV while I gamed. Parents didn’t hear a peep.”
“Thank you, oppa.” You bowed, gratitude seeping out of each of your pores.
“Now, those marks on the other hand,” he gestured to your neck, “might I suggest an ice pack for 20 minutes and then some really good makeup?”
You hurried into the bathroom as he laughed his way towards the kitchen. A minute later he knocked, passing you a small ice-pack through the cracked door.
“20 minutes,” he reminded you with a wink, and went back into his room with his cereal.
Saying goodbye to Jungkook’s parents after a late breakfast was tough. His mom cried, saying her baby son did not visit enough and that she would miss him. She also said she would miss you greatly, and that you better come back with him soon to visit.
It was tough to promise her that you would, knowing that there was a very real chance that you wouldn’t. This was fake after all. You had just agreed to extend the contract briefly, to get through the holidays and while Jungkook said ‘fuck it’ last night, with the rising of the sun came the clarity of the situation. 
Jungkook behaved much the same, holding your hand and showering you with PDA, and while you reciprocated, you couldn’t help but feel like the magic of Christmas was over. Heading back to Seoul meant back to reality. You weren’t sure you were ready for that. For the first time in your life, you felt like you could see a future with someone, with him, despite the relationship being fake thus far. To be honest, it hadn’t felt fake since the night of the party. 
The entire trip, all 3 and a half hours of it, you ruminated on last night and what it meant. You hated to admit that you had fallen for Jungkook, and had given up rule number 7 on a whim. For all you knew, he would be going back to Somin at the end of this. 
In his own little world, Jungkook too couldn’t stop thinking about you and what last night meant. He wished he had said to forget the contract all together, instead of just for the night. He wanted to see if you felt the same way, but he wanted to be sure that his Somin chapter was done. He needed to see her and make sure he was over her, and not just using you as a rebound. You didn’t deserve that.
Jungkook’s body language had you on edge, as his foot tapped incessantly as the train got closer and closer to Seoul. You placed your hand on his knee, a reassuring move for both of you. 
“Jungkook, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing. I just—Somin messaged me.” He had been thinking about it the whole trip back to Seoul, about how her messages didn’t affect him anymore. Before, he could barely go a few minutes before responding. Now, almost 18 hours had passed and he wasn’t bothered.
“When?” Your voice came out sharper than intended, and Jungkook flinched back from you.
“Uh, last night, right after I got out of the shower.”
Your brain began to connect dots that you didn’t want it to.
“Oh,” you respond, trying to keep your voice light. Jungkook was confused at your reaction; usually you were jumping to keep him and Somin apart. This response felt like you didn’t care, like if he met up with Somin, it wouldn’t impact you at all.
“She just… I think that you’re right. The plan is working and I’ve been happier than I’ve been in a long time. But I guess there’s that part of me that needs to talk with her, express how I feel. I want to be sure.” Before I confess my feelings to you, he thought.
“Right. Well, that was the goal, getting you to figure out what you want.” You turned your head away from him and deeper into the neck pillow, trying to get this conversation done and over with before he said something that really broke your heart.
“I know. I guess I’ll meet up with her when we get back? The sooner the better I guess.”
“True, the faster you meet with her, figure it all out, the faster we can move towards breaking up.”
Jungkook freezes, but you don’t notice, too focused on not looking at him.
“At breaking up?”
“Yea, that was the plan right? We date for a couple more weeks, then break up, so you can get back with Somin, if she’s changed, you know?”
“You—”
“Hey Jungkook? I’m really tired, can we talk about this later?”
Jungkook stared at your form, taking in how closed off you were from him. He didn’t understand what changed. He sat back, finally replying to Somin’s text, agreeing to meet at a cafe by his apartment later that evening.
Jungkook saw you home, worried the entire ride to your place about what was happening between the two of you. He thought everything had been going well, and after last night, he didn’t know how he could have possibly fucked up. He hoped you were just PMS-ing, like Somin used to always blame moods like this on. 
You let him carry your suitcase upstairs to your apartment and when he leaned in for a kiss, you kissed him back, but he felt it was almost out of obligation; your sister was sitting on the couch watching the two of you. Jungkook paused at your door, but you had turned away from him, so ready to be alone. So he let you close the door in his face, let you have time to yourself.
Jungkook got to the cafe, eyes searching for the long black hair of his ex. When he approached her she smiled at him. Jungkook saw the way her face lit up, the way the smile graced her pretty face, and felt nothing for it. Sitting down, a cafe worker took their drink order and left them alone.
“So, you said you wanted to talk?” Jungkook asked, fidgeting with his fingers drumming on his knee.
“Kookie, I miss you.” Somin leaned toward him, chest pushed out in her off the shoulder zebra print dress. Her black heel nudged against Jungkook’s leg, rubbing it suggestively.
Jungkook moved his leg out of reach and sighed.
“Somin—”
“Minnie.” She pouted, red painted bottom lip jutting out after she cut him off to correct her name.
“Somin. I—I’m sorry.” Jungkook felt awkward. Here he was, sitting in front of his ex, who was undoubtedly a gorgeous woman. But after all they had been through—all she put him through—and all the healing you had done to his heart, he realized he had fallen out of love with her a long time ago. “I know you had hopes of us getting back together.”
“Well, of course we’re getting back together Kookie. We’re made for each other. Since we were 20! I know this thing with Y/N is just revenge. You wanted to make me mad, teach me a lesson,” she said as she reached out and grabbed Jungkook’s hand in hers, “and I have learned it. Christmas without you was so sad. I had no one to go out to all the holiday parties with.”
Jungkook shifted in the metal chair. “Look, Somin—”
“Why do you keep calling me that?” she interrupted again, and Jungkook let out a loud sigh as he tried to maintain his cool.
“Because, I’m trying to tell you that I—”
“Jungkook! Somin!”
The loud yell of the barista reading out orders cut Jungkook off for the third time, and he groaned, running his tattooed hand over his face. With a huff, he stood up, walking through the crowded cafe to get the drinks so he could just tell Somin the truth; he may have initially wanted to teach her a lesson, but he ended up being the person who learned something from it. He was in love with you; wanted to spend more holidays like the one that just passed, with you. He truly didn’t feel anything for Somin anymore, other than friendship.
While Jungkook was up, Somin noticed his bag was open, a fancy camera strap hanging out of it. It was embroidered; the phrase ‘you shine brighter than anyone’ apparent once she pulled it free from his oversized black backpack. Somin threw a glance over her shoulder at Jungkook, seeing him still busy, so she stuffed the strap into her purse. Grabbing her phone, she sent a text to Taehyung.
Jungkook set down the drinks before sitting down himself and commanding the attention of his ex. 
“Look, Somin, I just—I’m sorry.” Jungkook looked down at his hands before making eye contact with her. “I don’t see us getting back together. I—” he paused, taking a deep breath before he spoke his truth, “I’m in love with her, Minie. I know that’s not what you want to hear, but I want to be happy. I want you to be happy with someone who feels about you, how I feel about her.”
Somin stared at Jungkook before she laughed. He was unsure of the emotions she was actually feeling; perplexed by her reaction to what he just told her. He didn't want to be with her anymore, and he wasn’t looking for her to beg, but he expected a little more... sadness? Push back? Once she was done laughing, she leveled her gaze at him.
“You, you’ve barely been seeing her Jungkook. How can you love her?”
Jungkook took a sip of his drink, gathering his thoughts before he answered her. The judgement that laced her tone made him angry, but he didn’t want to give Somin the upper hand. He wanted to be an adult about the situation. In retrospect, he hadn’t been honest with Somin when she first confessed to him, and you deserved for him to share that honesty now, even if it was coming 5 years later.
“I think—I think a part of me has always loved her. Since that first year. Don’t get me wrong, I think I loved you too and at some point we just… I think we just broke up and then made up too many times because it was easy… familiar. I love you Minie, and you were a huge part of my life. I’m just not IN love with you.” Jungkook leaned forward towards Somin, placing his hand over here, hoping that she would see and feel his sincerity and his benevolence. 
“Wow, I—You’re serious?” Somin’s voice was quiet as she questioned him. “I guess I didn’t think I’d be starting the new year without you.”
Jungkook watched as she slid her hand out from under his and placed it in her lap.
“Please, be happy for me Minie, and when you’re ready, I’ll be happy for you too.”
The loud chime from Somin’s phone went off. Jungkook watched as she looked at her screen, eyes growing wide.
“Shit, an emergency with Tae.” Somin looked up at Jungkook, her face soft and apologetic.
“Koo—I mean Jungkook, I was just surprised is all. I—I am happy for you and Y/N. Or, I guess it’s more like, I will be. I’m sorry, I have to run, but thank you for meeting with me.”
Somin gave him one last smile, as if showing she was throwing the towel in, before she stood up and left the cafe in a hurry. Jungkook watched her as she dashed off, disappearing down the sidewalk towards the nearest bus stop. He thought the meeting had gone well, or at least better than expected. Maybe Somin has grown up, he thought to himself, unaware of the way she made off cunningly with his gifted camera strap, using a text that confirmed the time for the next morning’s meeting with Taehyung as an excuse to escape.
——
After closing the door in Jungkook’s face, you retreated to your room, claiming that a headache was creeping in from the long train ride. Your sister nodded, engrossed in her latest K Drama. You rolled your suitcase into your room, stripped your travel clothes from your weary body, and entered your shower. 
Free to do as you pleased, with the water to cover the sound, you wept. How foolish you felt, letting Jungkook close to you once again, only to see him rush off to Somin. It was almost like what happened 5 years ago, when you had gone to his dorm room and found her confessing. Just like then, Somin was winning Jungkook; once again he had slipped through your grasp.
That night you texted Jungkook to tell him you would be going to the office early and that he needn’t pick you up.
Jungkook was relieved upon seeing your text. He had spent the better half of the evening and the morning tearing apart his apartment. He had called his parents, his brother, and overturned his luggage onto the floor. He could not find the camera strap you made him. 
He knew that he shouldn’t have taken it off the camera, but he spilled a bit of leftovers from his mom on it while on the train and removed it to make it easier to clean once he got home. 
Unfortunately, it was nowhere to be found. 
Jungkook was frantic; he knew that you made it for him that night you sat in the sewing room with your mom and sister while he was with your dad. Your mom had an embroidery machine, and so you snuck in there under the premise of bonding time and worked on it. He loved the phrase you chose for him; it reminded him of your love letter to him, the way you had written about him making you feel as beautiful as a night sky. “you looked at me as if the galaxies were reflected in my eyes...”
Dumping out his black backpack for the umpteenth time, Jungkook sifted through notebooks, film, wrappers from snacks, a small hygiene bag, and loose photos. He doesn’t know why he continued looking through the same places. It’s not there. Glancing at the clock, he realized he would be late to the Monday morning meeting. Giving up and putting everything he needed back into his bookbag, he stepped over the mess and headed out to his car.
Walking into the conference room, everyone looked tired from their holidays, but with the New Year around the corner, it was important for everyone to attend before January. SeoulM8’s comeback was fast approaching, and making sure everything was moving smoothly was imperative to whether the next holiday was spent relaxing or spent stressed out. 
Stirring your coffee, you walked through the propped open door and maneuvered your way over to where your assistants sat. Kim, the same one who brought you the tiger lillies several weeks ago, smiled at you as she slid you the stapled packet she printed out from the email.
“I think we’ve done all our parts, the photos Jeon emailed over have been approved by the boss, and we double-checked the designers they are wearing. I think all that’s left is to get final approval on the outfits for their comeback shows and interviews during comeback week.” 
You nodded, sipping the still hot coffee as Kim spoke quietly about the role you played for SeoulM8, eyes on the printed email. It didn’t help the way you could feel the mocha eyes of a certain ‘missing in action’ best friend burning into the side of your face; or the way the empty seat across from you saved for a certain ‘boyfriend’ of yours had your anxiety on edge.
With 5 minutes left until the meeting commenced, you had done a pretty good job at tuning out all of the mindless chatter around you, that is until Somin’s nasally voice interrupted your response to Kim.
“Oh, this? It’s just a little gift for JK.”
“But you broke up? He’s with Y/N now...” Hobi said, cutting off a reply from one of the assistants sitting near Somin.
“But we dated for 5 years, he’s still important to me. I think he’ll love it.” She turned her back to Hobi, who tried to make eye contact with you. You looked down at your coffee instead.
When Jimin and Taehyung walked into the room, everyone quieted down and took their seats if they weren’t already, assuming Bang PD, the head boss, would be quickly approaching behind them. Before the glass door could swing fully shut, Jungkook sprinted into the room, out of breath.
“Oh Jungkook, here!” Somin stood up, making a big show out of handing him the small gift bag that had been on the table in front of her. 
“Oh? Uh, thanks Minie.” Jungkook said, looking for the head boss. Bang PD was still missing from the room, so he grasped the colorful tissue paper from the bag and removed it in one swift pull. As the paper fluttered to the table, Jungkook’s eyes lit up as he took in the present.
“Oh my God, thank you!” Jungkook wrapped his arms around Somin in a huge hug, surprising everyone in the room watching, including you. Despite all of your negative thoughts about you and Jungkook’s future, seeing him react that way was unexpected and you felt your heart ache seeing him hold her in an embrace.
Sitting down, Jungkook turns to talk to Somin when you notice Bang PD walking down the long hallway towards the closed glass doors. 
You turned to the front of the room where SeoulM8 was seated next to the only empty chair in the room, fully intending to pay attention, but Jungkook’s movements directly across from you pulled your attention away. When you see the embroidered strap that YOU had given to him for Christmas a mere 2 days ago slide free from the bag, you see red. Before Bang PD can enter the room, you’ve already stood up. 
Both Namjoon and Jungkook look at you, followed by everyone else’s gaze; it’s too late to hide the tears that fall down your face. 
“Y/N, I can explain—” Jungkook said as you make your way around the table toward the door. He grabbed your wrist to stop you, but you pulled it from his grasp.
“Save it, Jeon. It’s over.”
You leave the meeting, walking brusquely past your boss with your head down. You type out a quick text to him as you take the elevator down, apologizing for leaving and saying that an emergency came up. Bang PD responds within a few moments.
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Back in the conference room, Jungkook attempted to call you, but you sent him to voicemail twice. Giving up, he grabbed his bag, fully planning to follow you, when he saw Namjoon stand before he could. Throwing a dirty look at Jungkook, Namjoon shook his head at him before quickly following you out the door. 
You haven’t gone far, making it only to your office where you gathered up the rest of your belongings when Namjoon burst in.
“Y/N,” he sounded a little out of breath, probably from running to the elevator and then to your office, you assumed, “I—”
“Save it, Joon. You didn’t want to talk to me these past few weeks, so I don’t know why you’re here now.”
“Because I realized I love you.”
You stopped packing up your laptop, eyes slowly moving to meet his.
“What did you say?”
“I said I love you. I didn’t realize it until you started dating Jungkook, but I do.”
You shook your head back and forth, unable to hear or deal with his feelings right now.
“No, Namjoon, you don’t. You just miss Jennie.”
“Y/N, listen, I should’ve realized it was you. It’s always been you. You can’t honestly tell me that you’re in love with Jungkook?” Namjoon said this last part with contempt.
Tears fell once again, and you dropped your hands uselessly to your side.
“I do, Namjoon. I honestly love him.”
“Well, I hate to say I told you so, but-”
“Then don’t,” you voiced, cutting him off with an edge to your voice.
“You and Jungkook? Please. Anyone can see how different you are. You and me, though? We’re better for each other.”
“How different we are? Why? Am I too out of his league? Not pretty enough?”
“No, that’s not what I’m saying, and you know it. You guys just aren’t compatible—”
“And how the fuck would you even know?! You saw us together at what? One party? And then at work? What do you even know about our relationship, Joon?! You’ve been angry at me ever since you found out!”
“Because you and him together isn’t right! It’s supposed to be you and me!”
“Oh please, Namjoon. If Jennie hadn’t taken that Japan job and dumped you, you wouldn’t even be here right now. I wouldn’t have even crossed your mind. This is a pointless conversation.”
You walked towards the door, bag over your shoulder and laptop case in hand. Namjoon blocked the doorway, and behind him you could see nosey coworkers watching the interaction. 
“Move, Namjoon.”
“Not until you talk to me.”
“No,” you go to shoulder past him, and you were able to back him up into the common area outside of your office. He grabbed at your shoulders, holding you still. 
“Namjoon, let go of me!” At this moment you hated that you had dressed up for this meeting; a tight a-line pencil skirt and heels that don’t allow you the movement that you needed.
Before you can shimmy from his clutches, he’s leaning forward, his lips meeting yours in a kiss. In shock, you don’t move at first, not until your free hand shoved his shoulder and pushed him a step back.
“I can’t believe you.” 
The look you gave him could burn the sun, and this time you were able to push past him; the elevator getting closer and closer as you approached. You saw Jungkook, motionless, at the platform in front of the elevators; his eyes low in a glare aimed at Namjoon, who had followed you in your haste to escape.
“Hyung, you need to leave her alone.”
“Me? I’m her best friend. I would say you were her boyfriend, but we all heard her break up with you when she left the room crying.”
“That was just a misunderstanding. So like I said, leave her alone.” Jungkook stepped forward to his full height, chest to chest with his hyung, who prior to watching him force a kiss on you, he respected a lot. The tension on the floor was thick. You were mere steps from freedom, from Namjoon and Jungkook, when his words stopped you dead in your tracks. A misunderstanding? 
Did he not understand what the words ‘It’s over’ meant? That the contract, the relationship between the two of you, however real or fake, everything was null and void? 
“It wasn’t a misunderstanding, Jungkook.”
Big, confused, doe eyes turned to face you. “Y/N, please let’s just talk about th—”
“Why don’t you take your own advice and listen to her, Kook. You could never treat her how she deserves.” 
“Why don’t you go mind your own business Namjoon.” Jungkook bit back, fists clenched as he shook, holding back his anger. He just wanted to be alone to talk to you, but Namjoon was making it difficult.
“She is my business, she’s my best friend. She’s nothing to you now. Though, knowing you, that’s probably the reason she broke up with you. I bet you didn’t treat Somin right, and now you fucked up with Y/N. Can’t do anything right, can yo—”
Jungkook’s fist flew through the air before you could tell either of them to stop talking about what they don’t know. The sound of Namjoon’s jaw connecting to his fist echoed through the large room, and the crowd of bystanders yelled out in shock at watching a full on fight start in the building.
You yelled as Namjoon tackled Jungkook around his middle, tackling him to the ground before he reared back his fist to punch him back. 
“Namjoon, stop, STOP!” you yelled as Jungkook flipped Namjoon onto his back, swapping places as he took the liberty to return the blow. Putting down your laptop and bag haphazardly, you rushed closer. Leaning down, you grabbed at Jungkook’s arm that was cocked back to throw another punch, yelling his name frantically.
“Jungkook, Kookie, PLEASE STOP!”
The two men looked at your face, their chests rising and falling rapidly as they tried to catch their breath. Jungkook’s eyes were dilated. As he took in your state, he seemed to come back to his senses. He started to climb up off of where he straddled Namjoon, pinning him to the floor, his hand reaching up towards you from where he was kneeled on the ground.
“Y/N, I’m sorry baby, please just talk to me.” Jungkook’s bottom lip was split, a small bit of blood leaking from the cut. His cheekbone was red; you knew a bruise would form there. Namjoon too tried to sit up, leaning on his elbow as his split eyebrow spilled his blood down the side of his face. He too would be sporting a shiner for the next week or so. 
You almost reached for Jungkook, returned the gesture to cradle that beautiful face, but you couldn’t. Him fighting Namjoon changed nothing about the fact that Somin had the present you gave him, that she brought it to him as if she had given it to him, let alone the response he gave her when he saw it. Backing away, you almost tripped over your belongings before you thought to collect them, and then dashed into the elevator, leaving the two men bleeding on the floor as the doors shut, cutting off the view.
——
Dealing with the aftermath of the fight was not something you thought would be so difficult to do. 
Working remotely meant not being able to turn off your phone so you didn’t miss any important calls or texts. Unfortunately, it also meant you had to deal with the barrage of texts and calls from friends and co-workers wanting to know about the fight. 
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According to Jimin, the only person other than Kim who you were responding to, the whole office heard about the fight. With Jin being Jungkook’s roommate, and of course being the resident gossip, news traveled fast that the two men got into a fist throwing match over you. This only had you double down on avoiding messages, calls, and not posting to social media. It was unlike you; as a fashionista who worked with models and artists like SeoulM8 and Kim Seokjin, people looked to your accounts for updates. 
Your silence was killing Jungkook, the one person who had not given up. Jungkook hated to not give people time, but he had the feeling like the more time you had, the faster you would slip from his fingertips. You stared at your phone, watching his name light up on the screen as a picture of the two of you, set as his contact photo, taunted you with memories. 
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All you could do was lay there, curled up on your bed in your pajamas for the second day in a row, hating yourself. Hating the fact that you allowed yourself to break your rules, that you let Jungkook into your heart for a second time, only to watch it all come crashing down because he couldn’t let go of Somin. What did Somin have that you didn’t? How was it that she always won?
5 years ago you lost Jungkook to her, after giving him your virginity, something he knew was a big deal, as he had given his to you in exchange. And now again, you had so foolishly fallen into bed with him again, and he ran back to Somin. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice? You were already blaming yourself heavy for this one. 
Another day passed before you finally pulled yourself up out of bed long enough to shower and get dressed in a different set of sweats. A knocking sound at the front door had you tense up. Luckily, your sister answered the door, able to field away anyone who wanted to see you.
Creeping silently to the door of your bedroom, you cracked it open and listened to see who was there. From the angle you could see your sister, but not who was outside, nor could they see you. The warm tone was instantly recognizable, and your eyes widened as your sister looked back at you. Shaking your head profusely, she denied entry and shut the door, walking over to you. You back away from the door, letting her in as you sit on your bed. Crossing your legs, you grabbed a stuffie and clutched it to your chest.
“Hey, can you tell me what happened? Why are you hiding out at home and not answering Jungkook’s calls? What’s going on?”
You sighed, taking a much needed breath before you recounted the whole story. You told her about the journal entries being sent out, about how Namjoon had confronted you leading to you lying and saying you were with Jungkook, who came up with the plan to fake date each other until the Somin and Namjoon issues calmed down for both of you. 
She listened intently, shocked to hear that it was all fake, and she told you as much once you finished sharing about the fight that ensued on Monday.
“Sis, that man loves you. I could see it when he came to the door. I think you should talk to him.”
“No. It’s all my fault all of this happened anyways. If I hadn’t been drunk and sent those messages out, I would have never had to lie to Namjoon and start all of this.”
Yuna squirmed in your computer chair, her mouth twisted as if holding herself back.
“Actually, you didn’t do that.”
“What are you talking about Yuna? I saw the messages. I took the photos the night before because I wanted to upload them to an online journal platform.”
She nodded her head, wringing her fingers in her hand. “I know that, but you didn’t send them… I did.”
You stared at her, anger silently rising as you waited for her to continue. 
“I waited until you got into the shower. You know I read the entry to Namjoon, and so when you got into the shower, I used your phone and sent a message to each guy who’s name was both in the book and in your phone. I wanted you to have someone, instead of always spending your evenings at home, bored.”
“Yuna, you knew that I did not want Namjoon to know, he and Jennie had just... and I was trying to protect him, do you see what this did?!” You threw the plushie at her angrily, standing abruptly.
“I can’t believe you would invade my privacy, you could have ruined my career, if one of those messages had been sent to the wrong person, god damn it Yuna! You’ve ruined my fucking life!”
Yuna was crying, but she set the stuffed bunny back on your bed gently before she got up and headed to leave your room. Pausing at the door, her hand poised on the door knob, she turned back to face you.
“I didn’t ruin your life. You finally had a life. You’re the one running away from it now.”
With those parting words, she left your room, closing the door and leaving you alone with your thoughts.
After Yuna left you, she went to her own room, where she scrolled through social media to find Jungkook. You already blamed her, though she felt like it was misplaced, but she felt like she might as well do something to help fix the situation. Finding Jungkook’s IG account from the photos you tagged him in, she followed him. When he returned the follow, she messaged him to contact her. 
It didn’t take long for him to respond, and she asked him to meet her out somewhere. Agreeing on a local park, Yuna changed her shoes and left you moping in your room, a note on the counter that she was headed out.
Sitting on the bench, it wasn’t hard to spot Jungkook. His tousled black hair peeking from under his black beanie and the familiar black jacket was easy to spot against the white snow that had recently fallen, but like a Seoul snowfall, it wouldn’t stick for long. Carrying a hot cocoa for him and herself, Yuna held it out to him before she sat down, sipping on the warm drink.
“Yuna, I will say I’m surprised you reached out to me.” Jungkook’s usually bright voice was tinged with sadness as he looked over at her.
“I have something to tell you.” Yuna started, and Jungkook’s nerves grew.
“I was the one who sent the journal entry to you. Not my sister.”
“Oh? Okay. Thank you for telling me I guess.” Jungkook took another deep pull from the drink, letting the heat fill his body as he swallowed.
“I mean, I sent it because I didn’t want her to grow old and be alone. Every night, coming home bored to drink wine with her baby sister and watch reruns on Netflix? I wanted her to fall in love. And she did. With you.”
“I don’t think so, Yuna. She wasn’t in love with me.”
“She was; she still is! She told me everything that happened. About how dating you was all fake. But I know it wasn’t. Not for her. And not for you. No one acts the way you two acted. I know my sister; when she told me what happened, I knew that she was hurt because she’s in love with you. Like, still in love with you. She just doesn’t believe you love her back.”
Yuna stared at Jungkook, watching the way her words sank in, waiting to confirm what she already knew: Jungkook was in love with you, too.
Jungkook’s voice was quiet when he finally spoke. “How do I convince her? That I love her back?” 
“I wish I knew Jungkook. I wish I knew. But if you don’t do something soon, I think you’ll lose her.”
——
Friday was New Year’s Eve, and you had to put up with Yuna running around like a lunatic cleaning the apartment to ring in the new year. You had finally resigned yourself to forgiving her for sending the journal entries. It was over and done with, and there was nothing more to do. Monday, you would be back at work like nothing happened, and didn’t want to go into the new year holding onto this year’s anger or sadness.
Yoongi, surprisingly, had reached out to you the day before about a party he was having to ring in the new year, and at first you didn’t want to go, but the longer you thought about it, you figured you should. Why spend the new year at home, where your sister would relentlessly tease you until she left. She had her own plans this year, going to a classmates to drink and watch the fireworks; so if you stayed home, you would be alone.
And you were tired of being alone. Sleeping in, you didn’t get up to join your sister in cleaning until later in the afternoon, going through your closet, bedroom, and bathroom.
You were scrubbing your shower when you heard the doorbell, but your sister, ever the nosey one, yelled that she would get it, so you continued cleaning, forgetting that someone had come to the door by the time you finished cleaning the bathroom. 
When you finally stopped cleaning for the day, it was close to 9 PM, so you decided to get ready for the night out at Yoongi and Hobi’s place. After about an hour and a half, you were dressed, makeup done, and ready for the party. You ventured out of your room, noticing a large blue hatbox on the kitchen counter.
“Yuna! What’s this blue box?” you yelled, and her reply carried from down the hall.
“A delivery, for you, from earlier!”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” you grumbled, cursing your sibling as you reached to remove the lid off of it. Inside was what looked like a photobook, a beautiful ombre of pinks and purples decorating the cover. Removing it from the box, you flip it open, noticing right away the neat handwriting that could only belong to one person. 
Sighing, you carry it to the couch, where you read the inscription he penned inside. 
“Right at this moment, I think of you.” 
Flipping through the pages, you see he’s created a scrapbook of the past month spent together. Pictures of the two of you at work, the park, each other’s places, and visiting each other’s families. Pictures of you sleeping in his arms, candids where you aren’t even aware of him taking the photos.
Each photo is vibrant, in his style of catching the light just right as it caresses your face, and you’ve never seen yourself look so beautiful. He’s scribbled little notes here and there, of what he noticed or what was happening when he snapped the camera, and you can’t help but blush when you see a photo in there of you after the two of you had sex. 
“I reach out my hand, and feel your breath. With eyes closed, before we know it, we’re together.”
Your fingers trace over the photo, where Jungkook’s face is, looking at you so lovingly as you sleep on his chest, the bed sheets from his childhood bedroom covering you both strategically so nothing indecent shows. 
The last page has a handwritten letter, not unlike the one you wrote for him all those years ago, with a tiger lily pressed inside. You looked up the meaning of the flower earlier in the day when you found the large vase while cleaning. Please love me. With shaky hands, you held the photobook and began to read.
Y/N, 
5 years ago, you thought you were in love. I can tell you with certainty that 5 years later I pray that you are, because I am so in love with you. The way you see me, I don’t think I’ve ever been seen before. My whole life I’ve been behind the camera capturing others. And somehow you have taken the camera from me and now I’m the one being captured and seen. And I love it. You make me feel like I’m not just made up of the same ingredients that make up the stars in the sky, you make me feel like the very galaxy reflected in your eyes when you look at me. You’re beautiful, and I, Jeon Jungkook, am so in love with you. When I say I’ve always loved you, that there is no start, so there can be no end: we are fated—destined; you are mine as much as I am yours. These photos are only a fraction of the way I see you, the many shades that make up who you are, how could I ever capture them all? Please know, I want to spend the rest of time trying. So in case you didn’t see it, or weren’t sure: I love you. I want to be with you. No contracts, just you, wholeheartedly as mine, and me as yours.
——
It was nearing 11 when you reached Yoongi and Hobi’s house, leaving the Uber driver with a confused look at the way you dashed out of his car. You could care less; the man you were in love with was inside that house, right now, and you would be damned to let him get away again.
Pushing through the crowd of bodies, you looked side to side, searching for the familiar black tresses, ears straining to hear his musical laugh or catch someone saying his name. Entering the living room, your eyes fell on the beer pong table, where Jimin and Taehyung were playing against Yoongi and Hobi. 
Destination set on getting to that table, you wade through the throng of people with the obligatory happy new year. Some attempted to stop to ask you how you’ve been, fill you in on the latest office gossip, or inquire about the exact relationship status of Jungkook. Those in the latter category were met with major side-eye. Plastering a fake smile on your face each time, you finally shake the last of them, jogging the last few steps until your right on the edge of the game.
“Y/N! Glad to see you!” Hobi was his typical cheerful self, greeting you with his signature smile as he watched Taehyung try and line up his shot in the cups Yoongi just re-racked.
“Hey Hobi, Happy almost New Year! Have you seen Jungkook?” you asked, skipping straight to the point.
“Um, yea, he came by earlier to drop off a few kegs for us, helped us move the furniture, but he went home. Said he wasn’t really feeling like celebrating.”
Yoongi, who had just grabbed the ping pong balls before they bounced off the table, handed one to Hobi as he gave you a pointed look.
“Yea, looked pretty heartbroken all week, if you ask me.”
“Well, no one did Yoongi. Give her a break,” Hobi answered before turning to you, “he’s probably at home. You can get there before midnight if you get an Uber quick.”
Thanking him, you threw your arms around him and Yoongi in a shared hug before waving to the other two on the far side of the table. You had someplace to be.
Outside in the quiet, you requested an Uber, happy to see one not even 2 minutes away. Thankfully, Jungkook only lived 10 minutes or so from the guys. You hoped traffic would be on your side. You knew you were cutting it close; 11:30 was approaching fast.
The ride to Jungkook’s apartment gave you too much time to think. Those 15 minutes (thanks drunk pedestrians) on the car ride over allowed the nerves to settle in, along with the doubt and fears. What if he didn’t feel that way about you anymore? What if he just wanted to bring you the photobook as a goodbye?
Shaking the thought from your head, you took a deep breath before you climbed out of the car and into the hushed cold of the last day of December. You had never shown up to his place unannounced like this, so used to trailing him into his apartment. The closed door was daunting to you, but you didn’t have much time now.
Knocking louder than you needed to due to those pesky butterflies in your stomach, what feels like an hour is only 10 seconds or so until Jungkook is standing before you. 
“Hi,” you said, breathless from the cold and from the sight of him after so many days apart.
“Hi,” he responded, looking just as mesmerized to see you at his doorstep, “uh, wanna come in?” Jungkook took a step back, giving you space to come in and you stepped forward into the welcomed warmth of his home.
The scene before you is not what you were expecting. Jungkook had been sitting in the dark, a half eaten pizza and a beer bottle on the coffee table, with his favorite blue and grey plaid blanket haphazardly cast aside on the couch; most likely from when he stood to welcome you.
Shucking off your boots, you walked into the living room, Jungkook silently trailing you.
“I—I’ve missed you.” His voice is low, as if afraid he would spook you.
“I’ve missed you too.” You turned to face him, the light from the paused Netflix show reflecting in his beautiful orbs. You took in his face, split lip mostly healed and the bruise faded along his cheek.
“I got your gift.”
“I’m glad.”
The conversation between the two of you was static, neither sure of what to do. The silence ticked on for a few more seconds before you decided to stop being a pussy.
“Did you mean it? What you said?”
“Of course I did.”
“I’m glad,” you repeated his earlier phrase, stepping closer to him. You placed your hands on his chest, solid muscles reacting to your touch as he subconsciously flexed them. “Because I love you, too.”
Rising on your tippy toes, you pressed your lips to his, your body relaxing when you heard the sigh he let out from the contact. His hands pulled you closer, deft fingers gripping you in all the right places as he deepened the kiss. He tasted faintly of pizza and beer, and smelled so strongly of his vanilla musk. You couldn’t believe how much he felt like home to you. Being in his arms felt right. 
Bending slightly, Jungkook wrapped his arms under your thighs and lifted you up, never breaking the kiss. Hoisting you up, he carried you down the hall to his room, foot kicking the door shut behind him. So turned on by his show of strength, you rolled your hips down onto what was his growing length, seeking any friction that would help ease the ache between your thighs. 
Letting out a groan, Jungkook’s hands guided your hips roughly to where he wanted you, lining up your sweet spot so you could grind on him better. Licking into his mouth, your hands tangled in the hair at the nape of his neck. A slight tug exposed more of his neck, where you planted markers of your territory as you continued rolling your hips in time to his movements. 
“I want you.” The whispered words went straight to your core; hearing Jungkook’s voice break with need, need for you—you couldn’t get out of your clothes fast enough.
“Bed. Now.” You demand, and he laughs as he follows your directives, setting you down once he approached the edge of his queen sized mattress. You tug your jacket off, tossing it to the foot of his bed before peeling your shirt up over your head to reveal your bra to him. He doesn’t get to look too long; you’ve gripped the waistband of his grey sweatpants and pulled them low enough to free him from it’s confines. His cock sprung free, and, licking your lips, you switch positions with him. 
With his back to the bed, you pushed him down, and he went easily. Pressing your hand to his chest, you lay him back as you bend at the waist, bringing your mouth to his leaking head. You lick the bottom of his shaft up to the slit, collecting the pre-cum with the tip of your tongue before you take the head into your mouth, swirling your tongue around the sensitive tip. Under your hand, you feel his abdominal muscles contract as he lets out a moan letting you know how good you feel as you take him farther into your mouth. 
Speeding your ministrations, you hollow your cheeks as you slurp around the head, using your hands to massage the dripping spit along the exposed skin you can’t reach. His hands grip your hair creating a makeshift ponytail to keep it out of your face so he can watch you. And wow, does he love the sight of your lips wrapped around his cock, innocent eyes blinking coyly up at him while your mouth is stretched around him. Keep it up and he could cum too quickly in your mouth.
When your free hand traveled to his scrotum, he jumped, feeling an overwhelming sense of pleasure as his sack tensed up.
“Wait, baby, I don’t want to cum yet.” Jungkook panted, and you pop off of him with a lewd sound that filled the quiet of his room.
Tugging you towards him, he scooted back on the bed until his head was flush with the headboard. 
“Strip for me,” he urged, and you did, undoing the button on your jeans and sliding them down until you were naked from the waist down. His eyes stared pointedly at your chest and you unclasped your bra, adding it to the growing pile of clothes the two of you had made. Watching as he shed his shirt before laying back fully, kicking his sweats free from his body, you climbed onto the bed, and he directed you farther up his body until he could maneuver your thighs to either side of his face. 
“Jungkook—”
“I’ve wanted you like this for so long, baby, please.”
Giggling softly, you lowered yourself slowly and he wound his arms around your thighs until his palms were wrestling lightly on them. The slow caress as he drew patterns on your skin matched the same pattern he drew with his tongue, you realized once he had you fully seated. Gripping the headboard, you threw your head back, rolling your hips as his lips and tongue ravaged you, the sexual sounds of him eating you out creating more for him to drink down. 
Curving your back to make you hunch forward, you adjust as the pleasure builds and you see his eyes, those bright galaxies staring at you as he pleasured you to climax and you tensed as the coil in your abdomen snapped, a mix of curse words and his name pouring from your lips as he worked you through it.
Placing your hands on his sweat laced forehead, you pushed to try and pull away from the overstimulation as he let out a laugh.
Scooting yourself down his body once he released you, you fell back and to the side of his muscular thighs, trying to catch your breath. You feel him moving, a low chuckle released as his hands grasped your wrists. Pulling you up, you see he’s now seated flush to the headboard, back against the soft grey padding. He guides your hips so that you straddle him, sitting your still sopping wet cunt onto his cock. Pressed against his stomach, he can feel the warmth emanating from your opening, and groaned, wanting to be inside of you.
Pressing his forehead to yours, his eyes meet yours as he intertwines your fingers before resting your interlocked hands behind your back at the curve of your ass.
“I love you.” His voice is strong, sure and confident in the words he says as he bares more than just his body before you. “I wanted you so badly back then, I want you even more now.” He presses a kiss to your lips, causing you to grind down on him. 
He kisses down your neck, hands still holding you in position over him. “Want to be inside of you, baby.” He nips at your neck, making you gasp, and when you rock forward, he’s rocking his hips down. 
The head of his cock presses against your core, and you settle back onto it, walls stretching to accommodate his girth. The two of you move in tandem, lips once again reunited in a raunchy kiss that only serves to turn you on more, sending enough slick between your lower lips to allow him to slip further into you until he’s bottomed out, a snug fit as the tip of his cock kisses your cervix. 
Releasing your hands, his large palms hold your back to pull you closer to him as you swivel your hips, rocking so the shaft slips in and out of you in short bounces. You rock, arms wrapped lazily around his neck as you play with the wet locks of hair as you ride him at your leisure, just enjoying the feel of your bodies connected as one. Chest to chest, you can feel the speed of his heart beat; it matches your own. 
“Can I go faster?” you asked, not wanting to go at a pace he wasn’t comfortable with.
“You can use me however you want, baby,” he replied, eyebrow cocked smugly as he gripped your waist tighter, “but please tell me I can cum inside.”
Nodding as you sped up, you bounced with more friction, his pelvic bone rubbing against your clit as you chased your high, fucking yourself on his formiddable cock.
“That’s it, fuck, baby, right there—” Jungkook’s moans, musical as he egged you on, brought you to your peak for the second time that night. Your walls clenched around him, and as your body froze, he took advantage of the moment to shift your bodies so you were on your back with your head to the foot of the bed. Bracing his feet on edge where his mattress met the headboard, he began to piston his hips into you, chasing his own high.
“Fuck, Jungkook, I’m gonna—again—” You can barely get the words out when your third orgasm is crashing around you, legs shaking from where they’re wrapped tightly around his narrow hips. Your release makes it wetter, and your swollen walls ache to feel his cum fill you.
“Gonna fill you up so good, baby, fuck a—baby into you, fuck, I want to see you carry my—my kid,” Jungkook’s cock is drowning in your essence, and hearing him talk about kids with you causes you to tighten around him, and he’s cumming, long ropes of his hot cum filling you until it’s seeping out around him as he continues to thrust indiscriminately, velvet muscle milking him dry.
Laying skin to skin in his bed, you laugh as the alarm clock numbers alert you to the fact that you had missed the New Year by 38 minutes. 
“What’s so funny?” Jungkook asked, eyes alight as he takes in your smile. 
“We missed New Year’s.”
“We didn’t miss it, we were simply enjoying our New Year’s kiss for longer than most.” He quipped back, fingers tracing patterns along your back. Your own nails were lightly scratching shapes into his chest as you rested your head on his shoulder. You spent the next 20 minutes of the first hour of the new year listening to him explain what happened with the camera strap, though you had already forgiven the incident. 
He wasn’t sure how Somin had the camera strap, though he suspected she stole it from his bag at the cafe. Jungkook told you about the meeting, how it helped him see that you weren’t a rebound; he was in love with you and while it was obvious to him, a part of him wanted to be sure before confessing to you. He didn’t want you to think he was rushing into things to get over his ex. He also apologized for fighting Namjoon, saying he was worried that seeing him fight would change how you viewed him, change his chances of being with you, this time for real.
“I love you, Jungkook, in case you didn’t know.”
“I love you too, in case you didn’t know.” 
“Hmm, but, I think we need to talk about children though, I think it’s a little too soon, despite our parents' ideas.” You giggled, and his cheeks turned red in embarrassment.
“It was just sex talk, we’re still just practicing, okay?”
Stretching, you roll away from his body, and he follows your body heat subconsciously, his body not wanting you far from him after almost a week of radio silence. 
“Hey, get back here, you’re mine.”
“Oh am I?” you teased, staying just out of his reach.
He pouted, accent slipping out as he moved closer to your retreating body.
“Yes, you’re mine, no rules, no contracts; just mine.”
“ ‘m all yours, baby,” you mumbled as you rubbed your nose to his in an eskimo kiss as he gathered you up in his arms, “and you’re mine.”
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UPDATE (5.18.21): 1st Prologue is Out Now!
BTW, ily ⟢ summary: Taking place in the To All the Men I’ve Fucked Before (TATMIFB) AU, this pre-story is the backstory to you and Namjoon’s friendship. A year after losing your virginity to Jungkook, you meet Namjoon, who becomes your best friend… and who you want so much more with. Before you and Jungkook get it together in To All the Men I’ve Loved Before, there was BTW, ily.
Thank you all so much for reading! I plan on doing an epilogue and some drabbles to get more insight into the pasts of these characters! I love them so much, I don’t think I am ready to let go. The masterlist will be updated as more are added! TATMIFB Masterlist
↣ all rights reserved © hisunshiine 2021. please do not repost. translations & modifications are not allowed.
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SEMIFINAL poll 1: Anne Shirley from Anne of Green Gables vs Matilda Wormwood
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Propaganda:
Anne Shirley:
The poster child for female-presenting ADHD before the diagnosis even existed for stereotypical hyperactive boys, she's a mess who always seems to stumble into trouble and generally seems like just too MUCH for more than one character, yet her general enthusiasm, creativity, and determination just compells people to love her sometimes against their will. And if you tell her she's in this competition, she will NOT STOP until she comes out on top.
because she's the most delightful little girl in the world & anne of green gables has held on as a classic for over a century
wild and wacky Troublesome girl representation!! also her deep love for diana!
Smart, imaginative, loyal orphan from a classic book series
The original kid lit Queen!
Anne has a big imagination and a big heart! She is full of passion and always tries to do best by the people she loves. She turns Green Gables upside down when she arrives and opens up everyone's heart right up. This competition wouldn't be complete without her!!!
A classic weird girl icon. I love her so much.
As someone who was always taught to be the 'good little girl' - Anne whacking Gilbert on the head for pulling on her hair made her an absolute legend in my mind. She loves nature, has a temper, and finally gets to enjoy the simple joys of childhood with her new family the Cuthberts.
she is so dear to my heart. she never stops talking and is always finding beauty in the world around her. she grows up through the series and reading it at different ages through the years meant I sort of got to grow up with her, which was really special to me. she has this wonderful story about finding family where she doesn't expect it and winning people over through being herself and being kind to them. also, canadian content <3
Matilda wormwood:
A love for books + telekinesis + intelligence = Matilda
I just think she's neat
She can move shit WITH HER MIND
She's smart, she's kind, she's autistic AF, she divorced her parents and made her own path, she has psychic powers and she's lovely.
ok look we all know (or are about to learn) that Roald Dahl was a horrible hateful bigoted antisemitic little man but Matilda is iconic. huge inspiration to so many of us bullied/abused/marginalized lil kids who just wanted love, understanding, and to read the heck out of some books. she was able to use her own brain and willpower to both get the help she needed, and punish the adults who wronged her so badly! (i remember wishing deeply that i could spontaneously develop powers as a kid for aaaages after reading this one)
because she's freakin' Matilda!
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deathbyjoong · 3 years
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ATEEZ Honeymoon HCs
Summary: I wrote a few thousand words on what I thought a honeymoon would be like with each member of ATEEZ. I hope you all enjoy ✨
Many many thanks to @bfyunho​ for beta-ing and generally being my favorite person 💕
Warnings: fluff and smut. 18+ ONLY!
Seonghwa
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Y’all already KNOW that a honeymoon with Seonghwa is just gonna be two weeks of him exercising his duality
Constant love-making? Absolutely. But also! Lots of interesting things to do and many opportunities to make memories
Where’s he gonna do that? A large resort suite all to yourselves in Mediterranean ItalyIt’s warm, sensual, fun, perfect--everything you ever wanted
Days spent wandering the town, swimming, finding museums and restaurants
Seonghwa insists on taking selfies at every single location--he wants to know every single one of these moments long after his memory has failed him
Sunbathing on a private sailboat on the Amalfi Coast, soaking in the vitamin D 
The ship’s captain finds a beautiful, unoccupied spot in a shallow cove, and drops anchor
He then heads into the cabin of the boat to give you and your husband some privacy
Seonghwa sits on a lounge chair behind you, rubbing sunscreen on your shoulders
He’s letting his hands move just as slowly and sensually across your skin as he wants, taking his time in listening to your breath hitch in your throat
Eventually ducking his head down to press his lips to a spot on your neck he hasn’t covered yet, while his thumbs still rub circles on your shoulders
Giving all his attention to that one area, biting lightly then sucking the skin to soothe it
You lean your head back, giving him all the access he could want, and a soft sigh escapes your parted lips
His hair tickles your shoulder, but Seonghwa doesn’t linger long before he’s turning you to face him so he can kiss you properly
He’s got the ties of your swimsuit undone in seconds, and you throw your legs over Seonghwa’s hips as soon as it’s off
You grind yourself on him, abusing his swim shorts in your pursuit of a little friction
Hwa grips you by the waist, firmly but not enough to hurt. Just enough to get you close--enough to help you rise and fall on him
Something occurs to you, and you break the kiss to breathlessly murmur in his ear
“You need sunscreen, too. You’re gonna burn.”
Hwa chuckles, dangerously low, flashing his teeth as he reaches down with one hand and picks up the bottle he’d set on the deck
“My wife is so considerate,” he coos, handing it to you
You take it, rolling your eyes. But Seonghwa’s arms tighten around you once more, and you’re brought close to the tent in his shorts again
“Will you put some on me too, then?” He looks up at you with puppy dog eyes that are completely betrayed by his pupils, blown wide
You squeeze some of the lotion into your hands and let the bottle fall down as you spread it over his shoulders
You’re consumed by his kiss again, gripping his shoulders, arms, neck, wherever you can reach
His skin rubs slick against yours because of the sunscreen, and all you can taste is the salt on Seonghwa’s lips as he does away with his shorts and finally pushes into you
It doesn’t take more than ten minutes of soft moans, grinding, and his mouth against your neck for you to come, head thrown back and facing the sun
Your husband isn’t long after, burying his face in the crook of your shoulder as he loses himself in you
When you’ve come down from your high, Seonghwa stands slowly and pulls you with him
“Let’s go swimming.”
You spend the rest of the afternoon wading in the shallow waters of the cove, soaking in the sun and kicking up the white sand with your toes
When the sun starts to slide down the sky, setting everything aglow with orange and gold, Seonghwa stands behind you and holds his lips to the back of your head
His arms are around you, and your joined form sways gently with the waves until the sun falls away completely
When you get back to the resort, you both shower off and Seonghwa presents you with a beautiful dress to wear to dinner
He wines and dines you every single night, even making an effort to learn some Italian to more easily place your orders and interact with locals
And each night, he lifts his glass and toasts, “To you, Mrs. Park.”
Hongjoong
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It took exactly zero convincing for you to get Hongjoong to agree to Paris
He loved the idea right away, because it’s a city known for its art and fashion
You reserve a penthouse room in the heart of Paris, with floor to ceiling windows and sheer white curtains
The two of you arrive in Paris decked out in the most impeccable airport fashion, ready to paint the city red
Unfortunately, the jet lag hits you both a little harder than expected
So you spend the rest of the first day sleeping and eating in bed, to the backdrop of sultry French soul music playing over the radio
The next morning, you wake up just as the sun is beginning to peek over the rooftops
It sends gold rays through the blue light of the morning
You slept with the windows cracked, and the soft breeze blows through the curtains
He’s sleeping next to you, and you curl up against him, perfectly content to get a few more minutes of sleep
His t-shirt smells like him--like home-- and you smile to yourself
But something less wholesome is going on his head
Hongjoong’s eyebrows tilt and his lips part as he whimpers in his sleep
It’s an expression you recognize, although he’s only ever made it while he’s very much awake
Usually as you take him, nails grazing down his stomach, watching his head fall back against the pillows
You have to wonder if that’s what he’s dreaming about, but you’re not about to sit by and let the dream version of you have all the fun
Throwing a leg over his hips, you rest your hands on Joong’s chest and slowly kiss his neck
He moans softly, eyes opening as he wakes
His hands find your hips, pulling you against the growing hardness in his sweatpants, and there’s a sheepish smirk on his face
“Sounded like a good dream,” you whisper against his lips
Hongjoong smiles in the dim light, his eyes flicking to your mouth
“It was,” he replies
His hand is creeping up your back, fingers purposely snagging on your t-shirt
“But nothing compared to this, and nothing compared to you,” he says, and kisses you firmly
You’re not usually one for morning sex, but this lazy love is exquisite in its own way
It’s all slow touches and kisses that are soft but not lacking in passion
Hongjoong shifts to be on top of you and your noses bump, causing both of you to giggle a bit
Joong hides his face in your neck, but takes the opportunity to place a few kisses there
The pair of you take your time in climbing the mountain, but you reach the peak at the same time, hands clasped and legs tangled
You tilt your head a little to watch his face as he comes because the sight of him, and the sounds he’s making, are nothing short of gorgeous
Following an equally slow comedown, you shower off together and clamber back into bed for another couple hours of sleep
When you’re both a bit more rested, you set out on foot to explore the city
Munching on croissants with Hongjoong at an outdoor cafe, and sipping espressos before setting off again
You stop at a small flower stand, and Joong buys you a handful of roses
As you walk on, he has his hands in his pockets, and you loop your arm through his
The content smile playing on his lips gives you a high, and you bask in the moment
The following day, you drive to the Musee du Louvre, and stay until closing time
Joong looks at the art, and you look at him, admiring your own masterpiece
You’re thankful you ended up here because it gives you a perfect, constant view of his profile, from his starry eyes to the tip of his nose to his lovely mouth
He catches you staring at him, and blushes while trying to suppress a smile
You do another day trip to the palace and gardens at Versailles, holding hands as you stroll through the ornate, golden halls and endless paths adorned by flowers
And, of course, it’s not a trip to Paris, or a trip with Hongjoong, if there isn’t shopping for clothes at some point
You pick outfits out for each other in the city’s best boutiques de vetements, from sleek luxury retailers to some of the more underrated shops in the art district
The two of you end up having to buy another suitcase for all the clothes you bring back, but this turn of events is shocking to no one
It’s the most fun you could have on a vacation, and your only consolation for having to go home at the end of the week is getting to start the best adventure of all
Being married to your best friend
Yunho
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You’ve always wanted to visit Austria
What better occasion than your honeymoon to spend a week in Salzburg?
It’s all wonderful-- the music, scenery, history, and dancing!
It’s a series of beautiful moments from the very start of your trip
You and Yunho watch Harry Potter together on the plane there, sharing earbuds and mouthing the spells together
At one point, Yunho moves the armrest so the two of you can comfortably hold hands
You doze off together, heads resting against each other, and are only awoken by the captain announcing that you’ve landed
You were worried about jet lag, but your Energizer bunny husband has an abundance of contagious excitement
You drop your bags at the hotel, change clothes, and immediately set off on your first adventure
It’s a sunny, breezy day and the sweet aroma of flowers on balconies is everywhere
You’re strolling hand in hand down a cobblestone road in the historic district of the town when you and Yunho hear the music at the same time
You’re drawn like magnets to the sound of a small band playing on the sidewalk
Yunho pulls you in for a dance, just like you knew he would, one grasping yours and the other pulling you close by the waist
As he swings you in circles, you think to yourself, this is why you married him
His carefree nature, spontaneity, and the joy his spirit radiates
And the laughter in your ears that’s just as much music as the instruments being played on the corner of the street
Though you don’t know the steps, and you’re pretty sure Yunho is making them up on the spot, you never once stumble over each other
He ends the dance by twirling you around, tickled pink at how much fun you’re both having
Next, you find a little outdoor cafe, and insist on feeding him yourself
Yunho is blushing and acting like he thinks it’s ridiculous, but when you finally give up, he picks up the fork and hands it back to you with a sheepish smile
You giggle and scoop up a piece of the chocolate cake you’re sharing, watching his cheeks turn pink as he accepts it
By the time the cake is finished, you’ve got a bit of chocolate icing on the corner of your mouth
Instead of just pointing it out to you, Yunho becomes Yunhoe
There’s a mischievous glint in his eyes as he reaches across the little table and swipes his thumb across your lip
You thought he was just being cute, until he brings his hand back to his mouth and sucks the icing off his thumb
As you watch with a smirk, Yunho gives you a look that makes it clear he’s doing the math in his head of how quickly you can get back to the hotel room
He throws a handful of Euros on the table (more than the bill would’ve been) and grabs your hand
Twenty minutes later, you stumble backwards out of the elevator, arms thrown around Yunho’s shoulders
His mouth is hot over yours, and you have to laugh at yourself for not even making it one day before jumping each other
But hey-- what are honeymoons for, right?
He breaks your kiss only to swipe the key card at the room door, but his lips are right back on yours as soon as he can
Yunho picks you up, wrapping your legs around his waist, and blindly pushes the door open behind you
You’re not sure whose idea it was, or if either of you even thought about it, but you end up bent over the balcony railing, your lower half shielded from pedestrians below only by flower boxes
Yunho’s got one hand around your waist, and the other hand braced on the railing
He’s groaning softly between kisses against the side of your neck, thrusting into you from behind
At one point his hand drifts from your waist to press into your clit, causing your head to fall back against his shoulder
Yunho puts a hand over your mouth to stifle the moans that you can’t keep in
You come shortly after with a muffled cry into his palm, and Yunho bites into your shoulder as gently as he can to muffle his own noise when he comes a moment later
You take a few moments to come down before Yunho walks you inside to clean off
You collapse onto the bed together for a much-needed nap, dozing off peacefully in your favorite place in the world-- your husband’s arms
Yeosang
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You had to reason with Yeosang just a little to get him to agree to go to Greece for your honeymoon
But once he realized why you picked it out of all places, he came around
It offers food, sunshine, fresh air, and many adventures in a place made for exploring
Getting excited on the plane ride in, giggling with each other and looking out the window at the islands like a couple of excited kids
You go searching for the best views in Santorini, climbing through the endless maze of steps between white and blue buildings
So many selfies--Yeosang smiling shyly with his cheek pressed to the side of your head
After a while, he really starts to relax and have fun, and his smiles in your pictures get wider and wider
One day is devoted entirely to walking through the market in town, buying random food items just because they smell good and holding them out for the other to try
At one point Yeosang slips away while you’re not paying attention
Trying not to panic, you look around, feeling like a child who’s lost their mom at a supermarket
Just as you’re starting to lose your breath, Yeosang catches you by the waist
You knew it was him just by his touch, but you still look to his face for the reassurance that he’s there
There’s a glint in his eye that implies he’s amused by your concern at losing him, but he tells you it’s okay, and shows you where he went:
A bright bouquet of flowers no doubt native to the island is bursting from his hands in marvelous yellows, pinks, and whites
You recognize Asphodels, but the rest are beautiful, nameless mysteries
They almost get crushed between your bodies as you throw your arms around Sangie and kiss him in full public view
No one seems to mind it though-- it appears as though love is in the air on this day, carried by the light sea breeze and lit by the sun
Yeosang smiles into the kiss before reminding you to be careful of your flowers
You take them from him with a grin, but when you’re on your way home, the smile turns into a pout
“Sang?” “Yeah?” “My feet hurt.”
Yeosang fakes a dramatic sigh, but it’s not another second before he’s crouching in front of you, holding his arms out behind him
You gleefully climb on, and Yeosang carries you the rest of the short walk to your AirBnB
He’ll never say it out loud, but his favorite thing in the world is feeling your arms around his shoulders
Just like on your wedding day, just like now, just like he wants every day for the rest of his life
Another day, the two of you are hiking through some of the more rural parts of Santorini, and happen upon a beautiful wild olive grove near a cliff face
You come back the next morning with a blanket and some snacks, and spend the entire day in the shade
Admiring him as you sit by the seaside, because he looks so stunning among the greens and blues and yellows
Again--SO. MANY. SELFIES
It’s not your fault he looks that good
Maybe he looks a little too good
Maybe you make a mess of your picnic blanket after grabbing your husband and pulling him on top of you
Once Yeosang looks around and ascertains that there’s absolutely no one around, he’s all game
His hands are bunching the skirt up around your hips, his mouth greedy and searching your neck for any spot that’ll make you whimper when he sucks into it
Your spot in paradise turns into rapture as his fingers meet your core, massaging you until you start to dig your nails into his shoulder
You’ve got one hand on his bicep and the other in his hair when he takes you in one smooth motion, finding his rhythm like he never dropped it in the first place
You come apart beneath him, and beneath the softly rustling leaves of the olive trees
The two of you fall asleep shortly after, completely relaxed in each other’s arms
Holding hands on your walks through the town at night, underneath the twinkle lights
You’ve married your best friend, and this is the best beginning to your lives together that you could ever imagine
Happiness settles around you like a light blanket, and you hope it stays forever
San
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Don’t ask me why, but a glass igloo hotel in Iceland seems perfect
It’s cozy but not too small, and it’s the picture of quiet luxury
The glass walls and ceiling give you a beautiful view of the wide Icelandic sky, which is clear as crystal after a fresh snowfall
There’s a fireplace against one wall, with a fuzzy rug in front of it and many, many pillows
You spend the first evening snuggled up there with San, sipping hot chocolate and talking about every random thing you can think of
He keeps finding reasons to say “my wife”, getting all giggly every time he does
After you fall asleep, another storm rolls through, dropping an extra foot of powdery snow all around you
You and San are oblivious, however, because you’re both fast asleep under several layers of blankets
Safe and warm in your little nest, you nuzzle your face into San’s neck, and he tightens his arms around you in his sleep
Because being with you, and keeping you close, comes as naturally to him as breathing
When you wake up, you see the wonderland outside and it’s not even a discussion-- you and Sannie are outside as fast as you can put on your clothes
You play in the snow together, and his adorable laugh echoes around you every time he beans you with a snowball
Chasing each other around like little kids, giggling and kicking up the snow
San catches you by the waist and spins you around, making sure to never drop you
You wrestle around a bit but eventually end up making snow angels together
When you stand up to admire your outlines in the snow, San pulls you close and presses his face into your hair
Putting an arm around his waist, you brush some of the snow off his jacket
He catches your hand, and holds it to his chest, where you can feel his heart pounding
“Never forget that this beats for you, okay?”
You almost cry, but opt to pull San to you and press kisses all over his face instead
He just giggles and accepts every single peck on his quickly-heating cheeks
Later that day, you make your way to the hot springs nearby, running as fast as you can to the water’s edge after dropping your coats
It’s a rush to the senses, slipping into the hot spring and away from the frigid air
San is behind you, gripping your hand tightly
You find a ledge that’s been carved into the rock underwater, and make yourselves comfortable on it
San leans back, eyes closed, and you can see the puffs of his breath coming slower and slower as he fully relaxes
You lean back against his arm, enjoying the feeling of his skin and the soft water pooling around you
You end up throwing your legs over his thighs and curling into his side
His arm goes around your shoulders, and you feel every bit of worry leave your body
You’re heavy with relaxation, but you feel lighter than ever
That evening, you’re watching a movie and sipping spiked hot chocolate when a flash of green lights up the igloo
Gasping, you stand up to stare skywards, mouth open
San turns off the movie and moves next to you, taking your hand and squeezing it lightly
You watch the Northern Lights in silence as they ripple across the sky in vivid purples, blues, and greens
A few minutes into the show, you glance over at San to see his eyes glittering with all the colors
He looks so beautiful, holding entire galaxies, and he doesn’t even realize it
When the lights begin to fade down, you reach over and pull San to you
He knew what you wanted from the first millisecond of touch
He responds in kind, tugging you as close to him as he can and making quick work of both your shirts
Chests pressed together and breathing ragged, you let yourselves fall back onto the rug
Arms and legs tangle as you make love beneath the glass ceiling, and the auroras begin to flicker again, making everything that much more beautiful
Falling asleep in each others’ arms, not only for the warmth, but because you love him more than anything in the world
Mingi
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Madagascar!
It’s a lesser known honeymoon destination, with fewer people than some of the more popular spots in Europe or the Caribbean
You have your own bungalow on the beach, with room service twice a day and spa services as well
Getting massages and face masks with Mingi? Yes. Doing so in matching fluffy white robes? Double yes.
Going on a safari adventure to see the lemurs!
You and Mingi pile into the backseat of an open-air Jeep and a driver takes you around one of the wildlife refuges
You two have the time of your lives looking at all the animals, grabbing each other and pointing when you see a new one
He’s smiling so big the entire time, and his happiness is contagious
You both sleep in late every day just because you can--no alarms, just birds twittering and sunlight filtering through the blinds
Waking up in each other’s arms, nestled under a layer of soft blankets
All you have to do is open your eyes, and Mingi is right there, sleeping soundly with the corners of his mouth turned up
His hair is tousled and he looks so peaceful
That is, until you try to get up to make breakfast, and he refuses to let you get out of bed
He doesn’t even wake up; just throws one arm around you and hugs you tight, humming in his sleep with a little pout on his lips
You can’t help but smile, and relent to his cute charm
An hour or so later, when both of you wake up, Mingi kisses you all over your face
It’s the best way to say “good morning” in his opinion, and you’re pretty sure he’s right
Another day, you do a guided hike through Amber Mountain National Park
There are even more lemurs, and many other animals
The air is so clean you can’t even believe it, and peace seeps into you with each step further into the lush, green wilderness
You stop to swim in an emerald pool at the foot of a small waterfall, and your guide steps away to give you a moment of privacy
You get close to Mingi, resting your hands on his shoulders and pressing your forehead to his
The water flows softly around you, but Mingi is your rock--steadfast and comfortable to you always
He kisses you sweetly, and you feel any tension he might have had leaving his body with each deep inhale
Your favorite moment from the trip, however, has to be your journey to the Avenue of the Baobabs
The Baobab trees have long been a legendary symbol of the African wilds, but seeing them up close in reality is its own level of breathtaking
Nothing could have prepared you for just how massive the Baobabs are, towering above the horizon as you approach in your tour Jeep
You’re dropped off at the beginning of the path that winds through hundreds of the giant trees, and told to meet back there in a couple of hours
Mingi pulls you down the trail excitedly, telling you that if he had to be a tree, he would be one of these
You snap your favorite photo ever that afternoon
It’s a picture of Mingi, grinning widely, hugging a Baobab (or trying to, since that particular tree had a diameter of about fifteen feet)
He looks so happy, almost childlike, and the joy just radiates off of him
That picture gets framed the second you return from your trip, and it’s also the lockscreen on your phone
Although your days are spent visiting every destination on the island, your evenings are a much-needed quiet time to recharge
You and Mingi snuggle up for a movie some nights, and other nights you drink on the porch and listen to the sounds of the jungle
Sometimes you get distracted from the movie or the scenery, and kiss Mingi a whole bunch instead
He’s more than willing to pull you close, and even carry you off, when you whisper something sinful in his ear
But no matter what you get up to, his love and sweetness are in every touch
Whether you’re out and about, or enjoying a quiet moment to yourselves, his arm is around you always, and you never have to ask twice for extra kisses
Wooyoung
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A beach resort in Turks and Caicos seems like the perfect place to go with Wooyoung
Hear me out-- it’s got music and tourists that are just as loud as he is
Crystal clear, bright blue waters greet you as the two of you hitch a ride from the airport
All the windows in the cab are down, because it’s sunny and just the right kind of warm
Salty sea air fills your lungs and the wind breezes through your hair
You’re given complementary rum punch when you check in, and it’s the perfect start to your trip
You and Wooyoung drop your bags off at the room and immediately change into your swimsuits
The resort backs right up to the beach, so you run out in your sandals, hand in hand as you make a beeline toward the water
The sand is hot beneath your feet, but you don’t even notice because you’re so excited and the water! is so! blue!
You crash into the surf seconds later, the warm water swirling around your legs
You wade through the water until you’re chest deep, then kick up your feet and float on your back
There are no breakers, nor boats allowed, in the calm waters of the bay, so you float in the soft blue for a little bit, content to just let the tide wash you back to shore in whatever timeline it sees fit
You reach out at the line between sea and sky, meeting the skin of Wooyoung’s arm
He’s still standing, staring in wonder at the paradise around you, but he takes your hand without thinking
He’s your anchor, letting you float without drifting away
You spend the next several hours going back and forth between the sea and the sand, finding beach chairs to lounge on while you lay in the sun
As the sun starts to fall in the sky, you decide to head back to the room to shower off and get dressed for a fancy dinner
You’re minding your business, rinsing the shampoo out of your hair, when the bathroom door opens and Wooyoung pokes his face inside
“Mind if I join you?”
“Not at all. It’ll save water,” you respond, smiling
Woo sheds his swimshorts and joins you, slipping in as fast as he can to keep the steam inside the glass door of the shower
You massage shampoo into his hair, enjoying his little hums of appreciation
He rinses it out while you wash your body, and you stand behind him as he washes off too
His back is to you and you openly stare at the water running down his back
You feel heavy, relaxed, from spending all day in the sun, but there’s one thing that could make this afternoon even better
Once all the soap is off of him, you step forward and kiss the spot between his shoulder blades
Never a stranger to your unspoken wishes, Wooyoung leans his head back as you kiss your way up to his shoulder
When you can’t reach any more, he turns and kisses you, hard
He’s got one hand snaked around your waist and the other holding your face to his
Your arms are around his shoulders in a heartbeat, and he backs you against the tile
It’s cold, but the warm water is still running between your bodies, giving you shivers
Wooyoung breaks the kiss only to kneel in front of you, throwing your leg over his shoulder
He brings you to the edge with his mouth, then stands again, keeping your leg hitched over his hip
When he fucks you, you’re worried that people are going to see the scratches on his shoulders the next day at the beach
But eventually, you can’t be bothered to think about it, and you lose yourself in his touch instead
You come apart shortly after, chests heaving and skin pressed to wet skin
A little while later, you’re toasting one another over dinner
The restaurant offers many amazing local delicacies, and Wooyoung insists on hand-feeding you at least half of them throughout your trip
There’s live music every night at the resort’s restaurant & bar, and Wooyoung doesn’t think twice about pulling you with him to the dancefloor
You’re not overly confident in your dancing skills, but Woo pulls you close and shows you some simple steps as other couples join around you
After a couple of songs, you’re able to get into the groove of the funky music that the island loves so much
Wooyoung’s smile is all you need to know you’re moving the right way, and you dance to a few more songs before going back to the bar counter for more fruity drinks
The two of you continue to get tipsy, then walk to the beach and make out in the sand like a couple of teenagers
You’re both giggling between kisses, digging your toes into the sand, and existing purely in the moment
Everything is sweet, from the taste of pineapple on his tongue to the heady aroma of plumeria blooms in the trees
Every day is a beach day in this place. You’ve never had this much fun, splashing and playing in the water, laughing nonstop
One afternoon, Wooyoung is passed out on a beach chair under an umbrella, lulled to sleep by the day’s warmth and the sounds of the ocean
After taking a picture of him to giggle at later, you get an idea
The air is fragrant with the sweet smell of the thousands of flowering bushes that are planted throughout the resort’s grounds
Nobody would miss a few of those flowers, would they? If you were to, say, pluck some and decorate your husband with them?
You slip away from the chairs and your sleeping Woo to gather a few blooms from the nearest row of landscaping, returning with sweet-smelling handfuls of them
You giggle to yourself, putting the flowers all around Wooyoung’s head like a little halo of yellows, whites, and pinks
He doesn’t even notice them until he wakes up, gets back in the water, and sees a bunch of petals in the surf around him
You laugh and take photos of all of it
Being on a catamaran at sunset, sitting side by side with your head on his shoulder
The sky is painted in vivid oranges and reds, and Woo’s hand rests on your thigh, his breathing slow and even next to you
The wind is a bit cool on your wet skin, but the sun still delivers warmth, and you inhale the smell of saltwater on Wooyoung’s skin
He turns his face slightly to kiss the top of your head, and you smile knowing that his love for you comes without him even having to think about it
As the boat smoothly cuts through the water, you feel completely at peace
You’re exactly where you’re meant to be, and it’s hard to think about your life turning out any other way than this moment, with this man
Jongho
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Buenos Aires, Argentina
Incredible local food, soccer matches, constant music, breathtaking city scenery--it’s a neotropical dream
First of all, Jongho is amazing to travel with
Being the eldest of his family, he’s well-prepared with a bag full of snacks, meds, toiletries, headphones, and neck pillows for both of you
He looks so cute on the flight, snuggled up in his complimentary blanket and neck pillow
He’s pouting in his sleep and you take several photos just because
When you get to the hotel room, he bravely offers to carry your luggage up the stairs for you
But he makes you wait at the bottom of the stairs so that he can come back and scoop you into his arms
Because he insists on carrying you bridal-style at every opportunity, starting with your arrival to the room
It’s a suite on the second floor, with its own balcony overlooking the main walkway below
You can look out over shops and restaurants and bars, all the nightlife in one place
You change out of your airport clothes, then venture out to grab some drinks and go shopping-- the boys had bullied Jongho into promising that he’d bring back gifts
The two of you are buzzing by the time night falls, but your feet are sore from walking and you’re exhausted from the flight
So you grab some food to-go from one of the restaurants and take it back to the room
You chow through dinner with the balcony doors open, allowing the music and chatter of the streets to carry in on the soft, warm breeze
Going into food comas immediately after eating, you and Jongho pass out on top of the covers, facing each other with hands clasped in the middle
You wake up to brilliant sunlight and Jongho’s arm thrown over you
He’s your life-size teddy bear, and you snuggle closer to him for warmth and comfort
When you both get up and around, you surprise Jongho with tickets to this year’s Superclasico-- only the biggest soccer match in Buenos Aires!
Jongho tries to play it cool, but you can tell he’s absolutely giddy at getting to attend a sports game while he’s here
He loves soccer, after all, and he can’t stop smiling the entire way to the stadium
He practically drags you by the hand to your seats, which are so close to the field that you can hear the footballers yelling to each other
Jongho doesn’t sit down a single time during the game, shouting excitedly in Korean even though he doesn’t know anything about these teams or who to root for
He’s just glad to be there, and it’s an absolutely fantastic match
On your short walk home, he’s got so much energy from being amped up by the game that he stops you on the sidewalk and tells you to get on his back
You blush profusely, but who are you to say no? Besides, you love seeing him be this carefree
The two of you stick out like a sore thumb in the streets of Argentina since you’re giggling like crazy and he’s singing to you in a language that definitely isn’t local
You indulge in some amazing street food before going back to the hotel and getting ready for the evening
He got tickets to a theater show, and it gives you an opportunity to get all dressed up
Your husband looks so handsome in his casual suit, and when you walk out in your dress, he’s holding roses
The show is wonderful, and you’re both part of the standing ovation it receives
You throw off your shoes when you get home, but there’s so much excitement outside that the night is hardly over
Standing on your balcony, listening to singing in the streets and bars below, with Jongho’s arms around you from behind
This man clearly did his research before coming here, because he actually knows some of the songs in Spanish and you bet your ass he serenades you as musicians pass by below
There are fireworks some nights for no apparent reason other than that the city exists to be a technicolor celebration of life
There is no better place to start this marriage, and no better person to be married to
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myuni-moon · 3 years
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[event details]
warnings: yandere content, blackmail, threatening, slight gore, rook being rook and hunting people for sport
the cards have given you the answers you seek, and everything has been set in motion. here are the themes present in your reading.
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Azul Ashengrotto
[XV - The Devil] ; How possessive are they?
azul is extremely possessive, not because he thinks he can own you-- though it does play a small part of it-- it's because he's highly insecure over a lot of things. he's fine with you talking with jade and floyd since he knows fully well that he can still somewhat restrict how much they can interact you. as for others, he's isolating you, even scaring strangers for simply greeting you a good day. he doesn't want to lose you now that he has you, and he'll do whatever it takes to keep you forever.
[XVII - The Star] ; How do they react around your ex/s?
that's if he hasn't already gotten rid of all your ex's by now. if any of you ex's are still alive, he's extremely passive-aggressive in a public setting. in a private setting, he's apathetic as he details to them how they just ruined their lives and if they don't want that to happen, they will have to sign a contract. one that has conditions where they will never appear before him and you ever again unless they want to disappear off the face of the earth.
[XI - The World] ; Where do they want to go for a honeymoon?
there are so many options, he just can't pick! there all kinds of paradises where you can spend alone with him... but if he really had to pick, he'd love to have you with him in the coral sea. there are so many places he'd love to show you. perhaps, he'd also like to see you with a tail, angelfish~
Rook Hunt
[XV - The Devil] ; How possessive are they?
he's not very possessive. in fact, he finds you oh, so beautiful when you flourish with others. he only asks you let him take pictures of your smiling face. there's nothing he wants more than to capture your beauty and observe you throughout your day. this hunter would just be in heaven if you let him follow you the entire time you're out and about.
[XVII - The Star] ; How do they react around your ex/s?
rook flat-out ignores them. the only exception to this if they were being a nuisance, then he'd either become passive-aggressive or intimidating enough to warrant any beast running away with its tail between its legs. he usually reacts as the latter, often finding joy in the chase of hunting down prey. he is a hunter, after all.
[XI - The World] ; Where do they want to go for a honeymoon?
he would love to have you stay with him in a little cottage tucked away from anyone and anything where he can spend all his time with you, all the while being the elusive hunter he is known to be. it just feels so domestic when he wakes up next to you, the warm sun making you glow and the quiet atmosphere making everything seem so heavenly. he also just loves it when he comes back after a small hunt, carrying whatever game that fell victim to his excellent marksmanship, and be greeted by a loving kiss from you.
Cater Diamond
[XV - The Devil] ; How possessive are they?
the only way i could describe how possessive cater would be is "look, but don't touch." he loves showing you off! look at you, his precious so darling; so pretty. so lovable, so adorable! he can't help but show off just how cute you are to the entire population of twisted wonderland. they can look all they want, but that doesn't mean he'll let others touch you. anyone who even tries to come close to you will be promptly exterminated or have their face mashed beyond recognition. no one comes close to his darling except him, of course~
[XVII - The Star] ; How do they react around your ex/s?
cater becomes dramatic, making a scene on just how cute you two look. he gloats openly about how he has the perfect partner, and anyone who ever let go of you would be so stupid to ever think of even leaving you. he's sure to play the role of the perfect boyfriend, all the while making your ex/s feel like shit for ever breaking up you. but then again, he owes to them a little for leading you right into his arms.
[XI - The World] ; Where do they want to go for a honeymoon?
he'd take you somewhere nice, somewhere lavish if expenses would allow it. he'd take you to one of the finest beaches in twisted wonderland, have you two stay in a nice villa near the ocean, and just overall have a nice beach getaway... that'd eventually be uploaded to magicam once you two are back home.
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