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realhankmccoy · 1 year

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Blue Ribbon

Technically, the hot new product for aspirational guys who wanted to get big was called Blue Ribbon Semenoll. Most guys at the gym didn't want to sound like a nerd in saying the full name, so it was usually just called Blue Ribbon, or sometimes, guys called it Blue Ribbon Nutjuice, which at least sounded like it had some fun humour to it. There were a few different brands out there already, but most guys did Blue Ribbon.

After all, fun was what it was all about, right? Who really went to the gym for their 'health' per se? Drew supposed some guys did. He'd really only been calling himself Drew for about a year or two.

Life was going good for Drew. He had a live-in boyfriend, Chris, and both of them had gotten somewhat more muscular together since meeting. They hit up the gym about two or three times a week.

Plus the sex... aww, yeah, the sex. He and Chris both saw themselves not so much as gay guys at all, really. They were just guys who happened to be attracted to men.

They were into what felt normal, what felt good... which was usually kissing each other, feeling each other's chests and arms, and grinding their dicks up against each other, hard in their briefs, which would inevitably come off at some point for some hot dick on dick action. They loved the feel of their hard cocks being pressed up against each other's bellies, and while they would give each other head from time to time, sometimes to just go hours with the feel of their hard masts up against each other was a sort of erotic bliss.

That a lot of guys were into watersports, buttsex , sex toy shops or chastity and all that was something that had just never appealed to either of them.

"A lot of guys just get into that because they think they have to," Chris explained. "It's almost like a performance, like they think that's what they have to do because they're gay. But... I'm not even gay, bro.."

"Me neither, man," Drew said, fistbumping his bud. "So glad we found each other."

"Right on, man. Plus you're looking more like a jock all the time. We both are. I don't think anyone would be able to tell we're into guys."

"Doubt it," Drew said. "Even before the gym, I don't think anyone knew, in my case at least."

"Yeah people pretty much couldn't tell. Same here."

It had been feeling like their relationship was just getting better and better. It was hot watching each other get stronger from the gym and comparing in the mirror or checking out old photos. Not only were they becoming the sort of guys they'd wanted to be, but it made the sex between them all the better. To feel the hard muscle that was developing on each other, like they were becoming better versions of themselves all the time, well... it was fascinating.

The erotic bliss seemed to be something that would last forever and that nobody could take away from them, or so it seemed. That's how the days and weeks were going for them both. At least, that is, until they told their friend Ryan about their sex life. Drew had figured he was giving his smaller buddy of a friend, Ryan, a life lesson in how good life could be with a man if you just did what he and Chris did. He figured Ryan could use a few pointers, since the guy was a bit less attractive and muscular than he was. Ryan also was currently between boyfriends.

"Me and Chris, we could just go cock-to-cock all night sometimes, or play with each other in all sorts of ways. We love it. We don't ever need to do anal."

"So isn't that just frotting, what you guys do?" Ryan started to tell Drew. "So it's not even like you're really having sex. You're just frotting on each other most of the time?"

"I wouldn't call it frotting at all," Chris said.

"Yeah, but that's what it is literally called," Ryan laughed. "Just because you don't call it that doesn't mean that's not what it is."

"Nah, we can call it whatever we want, bro," Chris said again.

"No you can't. I mean, get over yourselves, Chris. You're two gay guys who frot with each other. That is literally what you just told me. Case closed."

"Nah, that's really not the case at all," Drew stepped in and said, "but go ahead and tell yourself that if it makes you feel any better. Not all of us want to just be some typical gay guy. That's not what we are."

"Oh ok, well go and act like you're not 'typical', then, but absolutely nobody is going to take you seriously as masters of hot sex if all you do is frot with each other."

"That's not all we do, as I was saying, but whatever," Chris said.

It bothered Drew, enough that he was mentioning it to Chris in bed a few nights later already. "It's not like we're going to just start having buttsex because that's what some people think we're supposed to do," he was telling Chris.

"What we have is sex, bro. Just like oral sex is sex, which we do, too," Chris said. Drew knew, though, that they actually didn't have oral sex all that often, just not liking how it felt as much compared to the friction and fun of grinding on each other. But they did sometimes, of course. What did it matter what anything was called? What they did was sex, and it felt hot as fuck. Sometimes he jerked off on Chris's face, or belly, or came right on Chris's dick when they were -- frotting -- that word. But it was hot, and it was always sex between men. Wasn't it?

Still, Drew couldn't quite get it out of his head. Frot. Frotting. He wished Ryan had never said that, as it was really starting to take a lot of pleasure out of what he and Chris did to get off with each other. Somebody should have at least invented a better word for it, but nothing quite came to mind for Drew.

"Grinding, we're just grinding on each other," he'd tell himself, but he didn't like how that seemed to remind him of Grindr, which he'd deleted from his cell after meeting Chris. The app was just a grab bag of stupid gay hoebags if there ever was one.

Being a guy who was into guys was stressful, it seemed, when the gay culture around you was just constantly so revolting. It was as if gay culture, if you could even call it that, was almost designed to wreck everything that felt good about two guys just wanting to be guys, and just wanting to get with each other and be in love like regular guys. It was almost depressing to have to go through.

He wasn't about to go and change his sex life with Chris just because of one remark from Ryan. Still, it nagged at him, the thought that Ryan had pigeonholed him into a place he definitely didn't want to be pigeonholed into. Drew didn't want to have to be stuck thinking of Ryan's smartmouthed remark every time he and Chris got in the thick of it and started rubbing cocks, but so often it would flash through his head that he was now 'a frot guy' or something. And every time, almost like clockwork, that he thought of it -- it would ruin the heat of the moment almost completely for Drew.

He confessed this to Chris, that he couldn't get what Ryan called it, frotting, out of his head. That dumb word was messing up how he thought of sex.

"Well, to be honest, I didn't like him calling it that either. But it really doesn't matter what he called it, I guess lots of people do. It's just a word that isn't relevant, and it feels good to get off the way we do, so why the hell should we care? Lots of guys don't engage in anal. I've never desired to have it up the ass or stick it into a guy's shit chute. The way we usually get off feels the best, and usually better than just always sucking dick or handjobs do, at least to me."

"Yeah, a lot of it is probably that he's jealous and bitter that taking it up the ass hasn't been going well for him lately. He's probably butthurt from his breakup and wanted to take it out on us. I still kinda wonder if he has a point though."

"Nah, he doesn't, bro."

"Yeah but probably a lot of guys would say what he did, to be fair."

"Who cares what they would say? Besides, doesn't how we get off feel good?"

"Yeah, it feels really good. Just wish I didn't have to think of that word is all."

"Do you, though? Just don't think about it. Forget about it."

"Well, I've tried, that's for sure,' Drew laughed.

It wasn't even a month later that the guys, coming home from gym with their fruit smoothies, high on life and on their bond as lovers, got to mocking Ryan, who they'd seen on the other side of the gym again. Ryan was looking weak, very insecure on the machines compared to most of the straight dudes, even the older straight dudes. That's how they'd got onto the subject of cliched homosexual attitudes in the car, and how it weakens a guy to be too outwardly gay when that's not even what they're attracted to themselves.

Chris started talking about how ridiculous it was that some gay guys brought so many weird fetishes into their sex lives that heterosexual people probably wouldn't ever usually get into.

"I just don't get the whole 'piss on someone' fetish. Like watersports don't do it for me at all. Are you supposed to be that excited just because it's liquid or close to cum or something like that? Big deal."

"Yeah, that's something you'd probably never see heterosexuals get into. Or even lesbians. It's only gay men who would actually be messed up enough to find pissing on someone attractive."

"I wonder why that is," Chris mused.

"Probably because a woman would shut it down," Drew said.

"So it's a male thing, basically. I wonder if heterosexual men ever want to do that to women."

"I'm sure some do. But I'd guess most don't want to bring it up to their women, since they'd be afraid the girl would find it disrespectful."

"Whatever it is, it's attached to maleness more than femaleness for sure."

"Yeah, agreed. Women probably shut down a lot of things guys would do if they could get away with it."

"Yeah, but not all guys want to do things like that. Like you and me for example. And some straight guys do get into golden showers for sure."

"I don't know, we haven't wanted to, but maybe it's only a matter of time now that we're talking about it," Drew said, chuckling. "I mean, what if I peed on your leg in the shower? What would you do?"

"Probably punch you. Nah, just kidding. It sounds like a dog marking its territory, the way you put it like that. But really, who would even notice in the shower since the water just washes it away?"

"Well, better watch out, maybe I'll pee on your leg sometime when you're not looking," Drew joked. "Then I guess I'd have to bear hug you so you can't punch me."

"I'd twist out of it. Easy to twist out of the way in the shower when your skin is wet."

Chris had actually forgotten about the joke by the time when, a few weeks later, just because he thought it would be funny... watching Chris shampoo his hair in the shower in front of him... and heck, they lived with each other day-in and day-out, maybe he was just bored... Drew wasn't sure what was coming over him, but for whatever reason, Drew felt like he had to piss.

It was just an impulse, just a joke, really, thinking back on their convo from weeks ago. He wasn't even sure he found it attractive. It was more of a 'oh, why not?'

And so it was that Drew decided to look right at the hairy and powerful legs of the man he was in the shower with, thinking of what he had the power to do, and decided to go for it and just let a stream of hot, pent-up golden piss start to flow out of his dick, splashing up against the darkly furred calves of his boyfriend Chris.

"You motherfucker," Chris said, almost with a squeal to his voice, lifting up his leg and stepping forward out of the spray, practically up on one leg like a flamingo to get out of the way. Drew thought it made Chris look almost queer or like a little girl, the way he sounded and the way he was trying to dodge it. He started laughing and sprayed piss on Chris's other leg. Drew knew he couldn't lift both legs. It was funny as shit, Drew thought.

"What are you, gay or something?" Chris said. "Knock it off, man."

"Well, you're the gay one now, because you just let a man golden shower you. Plus you've sucked my cock, so..."

"Guess we're both gay then, because you've sucked mine, too."

"Yeah. But at least I've never been pissed on." Drew said flatly.

"Just you wait, mister. Haven't been pissed on 'yet' you mean."

"You sound really gay when you say it that way," Drew noted. "Just you wait, mister," Drew mocked back. "What is that?"

"Shut up, man. I want you to wash it off my legs at least."

"The water almost washes it off. But sure, I'll soap you up."

Drew massaged Chris's hairy legs in the shower, kneeling down and giving his bud a muscle massage to make up for what he'd down. He had to admit, he did feel a little bit dominant for just having dared to piss on his boyfriend's legs, as if Chris was his territory or something... as ridiculous as that sounded.

They'd been together so long. He had to admit, it felt good to have messed around like that, broken the boundaries, however playfully. It felt good just knowing he and Chris were chill with each other to the point where they could have fun like this without it being a huge deal. That was absolutely a perk of being attracted to men. Just to know a guy thought and acted mostly the same as you was a relief. Also, just knowing he'd done pissed on Chris first, and having seen Chris's funny reaction, had Drew feeling a little extra perk over how he was probably the more masculine of the two.

Not that Chris wasn't masculine, of course, and Chris was even the hairier one. But hair was different from masculinity, Drew thought, and this kind of was an example of that. He felt almost proud of himself in a way.

Drew wasn't about to hurt Chris's feelings, of course, by saying anything about how he felt like the man of the household. It would be his own little secret, Drew thought, still rubbing Chris's furry muscles for longer than he needed to, really, and smirking to himself over the thought of his own masculine self having just pissed on this stud's legs.

He tried to stop himself from smirking, knowing it was kind of an immature, dick move on his part to have pissed on his boyfriend and laughed about it, but the more he tried, the funnier it was and the more his mouth curled up. It's not as if Chris could see him smile, he thought, not with himself on his knees and Chris facing the other way, so he just let it happen. It felt good. He was still smiling when he stood up and passionately made out with Chris in the shower.

Chris didn't take his revenge for weeks later, and even then, well, it wasn't a vicious revenge. It was scarcely revenge at all, as Chris announced bluntly in the shower "I feel like I need to piss.... maybe on a bitch I know" and staring to pee on Drew's foot, moving up to piss on his shins. Drew wasn't surprised at all that Chris had decided to try and get him back, and he knew Chris was being considerate by not trying to one-up him too badly.

"You're the bitch, man," Drew said, making it clear that he wasn't intimidatedand placing one of his hands square in the middle of Chris's chest and pushing him back against the wall. Chris was still pissing, and now it was getting on Drew's thigh, even, so getting Chris up against the wall was kind of backfiring on Drew. But no matter. It was only urine in the shower, and besides, Drew had done it first, which was what really mattered, the way he saw it.

He grabbed Chris by the wrists and pinned him up against the shower wall.

"You gay or something, bro? You into that sick shit, pissing on other guys? You must have wanted this, to have a jock like me pressing you up against the wall like some bitch?"

"A jock like you!" Chris said, as if it were ridiculous that Drew would call himself a jock and talk about himself that way. But it was hot seeing his boyfriend act cocky, Chris had to admit.

Chris was openly looking at Drew's jaw, and at Drew's powerful chest. "I guess you have been getting pretty jocklike though, man. Gym's paid off. You're a lot stronger looking these days than when I first met you."

"You too," Drew said. "We can be two jocks together, then. Well, I'm one for sure. You could call yourself a jock too if you don't pull any more gay shit like trying to pull out your wiener to piss on me."

"Yeah, don't forget who first started that."

"Just marking my territory, bro. Like I said, you're the bitch."

"Can a jock be a bitch?"

"Only one way to find out," Drew said, kissing Chris and feeling the rough stubble on his boyfriend's face with his hand, which was always a turn-on. Soon he grabbing Chris's nuts with his other hand, even starting to press his fingers into the soft flesh of Chris's taint behind the nuts.

"You like that?" Drew said. "I've got your taint, man."

"I don't know, man. It's ok I guess."

It felt exciting to be taking their relationship to a wilder place than they usually did, at least for Drew, and it didn't feel gay at all. It felt masculine as hell. It felt illicit and real.

He already felt like he'd moved past anyone being able to dismiss him as just some gay guy who was into frotting. He and Chris did so much more than rut on each other. That there was a whole realm of sexual experiences out there that he and Chris would be able to unfold that would prove Ryan to be so wrong. He didn't want to ever be like Ryan, so primitive and stuck in the cliched prison of thought and unfulfilling 'top and bottom' sex that a lot of gay guys ended up stuck in.

Drew found it motivating at the gym to think of pulling further and further away from Ryan and really, any weak gay guys out there by building muscle. Chris reminded Drew that it probably turned the little buttfuckers on to know that both of them had the sort of relationship they probably wished they had themselves.

Drew knew it was mostly true. What Drew and Chris had was pretty much superior in every way to what Ryan had, at least. Still, there was that nagging voice, duller now but still there, in the back of Drew's head about how he wasn't having 'real' sex. He had almost resolved without even thinking about it that maybe at some point he and Chris would have to get drunk or something and go all the way just once just so they could say they had. Or maybe it would be so they could at least know what it was like once, or whatever.

Neither of them wanted to open the floodgates to anal, of course, and even if they tried it once, Drew knew it would probably not be a habit. They just weren't drawn to it. Chris and he both had avoided it with each other.

Anyhow, Drew hated thinking about all this. He knew if he and Chris ever did fool around with anal, he'd probably have to reciprocate. He and Chris were both sort of proud about how they've never taken it up the ass.

They certainly knew what being 'cunted' was, at any rate, and sometimes joshed with each other about how Ryan might have turned out to be like if he'd never been cunted. Maybe he'd be a whole different Ryan, a guy more like themselves. Hell, maybe they'd even be a circle of three bros who just liked to get off with each other from time to time, though it was hard to picture Ryan being as straight-acting as Chris and Drew were, or as committed to the gym.

"That's the major downside to being cunted,' Chris would say sometimes, "you would probably end up being just like Ryan." Ryan was definitely more femme-acting and scrawnier than themselves, more like a traditional gay guy, even if he was more sexually experienced. They knew Ryan had topped guy too, though, so he wasn't just a bottom.

That was the one rub about Ryan, the thing that nagged at Drew's mind. Sure, he and Chris were bros and were better in every way. But they weren't as sexually experienced as even Ryan was. Even though they were with each other ever night, there were a lot of places they just didn't go with each other. No matter how playfully they wrestled in bed, or how much he and Chris called each other jock studs, or how long the blowjobs went on, neither of them even knew topping or bottoming, let alone fisting or helicopter dick on camera or any hardcore things like that, all of which Ryan had tried.

They didn't do many drugs, either. Nothing beyond alcohol and rarely, marijuana. Most of the time, it felt reinforcing to their sex life to avoid those trappings, like they were smartly avoiding all the cliched downward spirals of the unhealthy gay lifestyle.

At other times, though, it felt like, well, ok, drugs were just one more category that spoke of their relative inexperience to a lot of other people out there. It wasn't that they were craving drugs at all. No. It was mostly that neither Chris nor Drew would ever want other guys to think of them as naive or as pussies.

Drew tried not to think of it, and tried to remember that he and Chris could be seen as advocates for healthy lifestyles and natural living. They weren't just guys who were afraid to try steroids and have wild anal sex and all that. It was hard for Drew to get the natural living shoe to fully fit in his head, because they sure weren't total health nuts or vegans or averse to getting really drunk at parties.

There was just something fun about getting totally smashed out on the deck and doing beer bongs every now and then, you know? The masculine energy of it all. He and Chris, both, were looking more and more like they could almost be stereotypical jock dudes every month. The gym had been paying off. Their sex was still hot. There really wasn't a problem. They were natty but not health nuts.

It was a good place to be at, Drew thought. It was all good... unless. Yeah, unless Ryan was somehow right and wasn't 'sex' at all that he and Chris were having, of course, and he and Chris would both go to their graves as nothing but lifetime frotters. Drew definitely didn't like the thought of that being his life story.

It wouldn't kill him and Chris to have anal somewhere down the line, Drew finally decided, though there was absolutely no rush. They'd probably were going to have to have it at least once. It would be just so he'd know what it was really like and be able to say he had the experience. And if they were going to ever have anal, Drew was going to make absolutely sure he'd be the one who gets to have it first. After all, he'd already marked his bitch in the shower, he wryly chuckled to himself.

Having thought it through was at least enough to get the anxiety, or whatever Drew was feeling, pushed out of his mind so he could enjoy the gym and enjoy getting it on with Chris again.

But of course, then there was always the looming 'when?' question that had now arisen now that Drew had made up his mind about how he'd have to have buttsex at least once in his life. When, the inevitable when of when he and Chris might take any of their romps in bed with each other 'to the next level'. Drew definitely didn't want anything to do with being a gay cliche, anyhow, and neither did Chris. Topping and bottoming was cliche, he knew. So for now at least, he wasn't going to think about it any more. He wanted to be better than the cliched gay guys. He just wanted to get it right.

Such were the thoughts milling about in Drew's psyche when he first started to tentatively consider that maybe the way to perfect his love life with Chris and match his ever-more-athletic change in lifestyle could be to take just a little Blue Ribbon Semenoll. Lately he'd been feeling like he Chris, as much as they were progressing at the gym, weren't quite having the carefree bliss of some of their earlier encounters, before Ryan had opened his big mouth. That they had pissed on each other already, well, that almost seemed to add a gay stain to their relationship, as funny and wall-breaking as it had been at the time. Drew didn't feeling gay at all. Maybe manning up their dicks and nuts just a tad would be the finishing touch their relationship needed, in a way, and a good way to seal their bond.

Sure, he and Chris had joked about taking Blue Ribbon in the past, and all the things that could happen. What guy wouldn't want a bigger dick and a more powerful sex drive?

But it definitely wasn't natty, no, not at all. He had never seriously thought about Blue Ribbon before.

Getting on Blue Ribbon Nutjuice was a major, major life change, on the same level as getting into porn or steroids. He and Chris had sworn they'd never want to get into something so risky. They were happy with what they had and with each other. Plus the last thing two horny guys who were attracted to guys could possibly need was to be even hornier than they already were, right? That's what Drew and Chris had decided together.

Still, it was actually the straight guys at their gym who had been the first to try out Blue Ribbon. Ryan sure hadn't tried it, nor had Josh or Pablo, who were the only other two guys they knew of at the gym who were attracted to guys.

Drew really loved what he and Chris had, but what if he and Chris someday tried Blue Ribbon Nutjuice, even just a very small dose of it? It could make their love life so much more intense. Maybe they wouldn't be just two guys 'frotting' anymore. They'd be two guys with bigger, hornier, almost perfect dicks... two guys smart enough to have come up with a way together to get pleasure far above and beyond what any of the typical gay guys in the gym were doing.

Of course, it's not as if Blue Ribbon alone was going to save Drew from being a cliche. He knew that. It's just that he thought minimal, smart usage of it could turn out to be the polar opposite of cliched.

Gays were known for their excess, after all, at least the way Drew saw it. There were already gay guys all over the area who had gone all the way on Blue Ribbon. Usually, it was the tops, as a lot of bottoms didn't want the big-dicked look, nor did their tops.

But there were some bottoms too with huge dongs to milk as they got fucked and fucked, night after night. He wouldn't want anything like that for him and Chris, no sir. But just a quarter dose, or maybe a half at most, to enhance what they had could be perfect, just enough to have them look impressive in the locker room together without seeming cliched. It would be just enough to keep them edging in bed for hours with each other without losing control of themselves.

He wanted to reclaim that feeling of man-on-man bliss at a level that guys like Ryan, Josh and Pablo could only be jealous of. Maybe getting on Blue Ribbon Nutjuice would add just the perfect balance to his sex life with Chris, especially if they both did equal amounts and were careful not to go overboard with it. It'd be more like two straight buds getting off. He ran it through his head again and again, trying to decide if he was being logical about this. Since they'd both put on so much muscle, and were planning on adding another five to ten pounds each -- and that was just for starters, since if they liked that they could keep going -- well, it was almost like it made perfect sense to want to bring their dicks up to speed with the growth of their bodies.

In his own mind, being the more manly of the two, or being the leader, as he had started to consider himself to be, he'd have to be the one taking it first. He was fine with that.

"I've been thinking of how maybe we could set off all this work we've been putting into looking fit with just a real tiny bit of that Blue Ribbon Nutjuice, so little that nobody would even be able to tell at first. What do you think? A little bit can't be risky."

"I don't know man, I want to keep it natty," Chris said. "That stuff is really powerful and they don't know the long-term side effects yet."

"Yeah, but what if I just did a little to start? I doubt they'd make it legal if it could seriously fuck you up that bad."

"Why, you jealous of my bigger dick?" Chris said. It was true that Chris had more than a quarter inch on Drew.

"Maybe I am. Now I'll definitely have to seriously consider it just because you said that," Drew answered casually. "Can't leave my dick smaller than yours, bro."

"Well, that would certainly be... interesting, I guess," Chris said, "though I don't think I'd like being outsized by you."

"Maybe you'd at least know what it feels like to be me then," Drew said. "And besides, you could always try a little too, and we could take it really slow, make sure to keep our dick sizes even with each other."

"I don't know, I don't think we should. My vote is for 'no'. I don't like getting involved in most drugs. I like you just the way you are."

"Yeah, but just think about how it must feel, Chris, just to have that small little bit of edge that stuff can give you. I even love the way the nutsacks even look on guys who've been doing this... all big as pears and even the way they get that thicker, wilder hair fuzzing out all scraggly... fuck. It's the powerful, manly look that still looks like nature did it. It turns me on to even think of it."

"So you've been checking out other guys?" Chris said.

"Nope. But you can't help but notice some of these guys in the showers, right? I know you've seen it. It makes everything about your groin so much more masculine, I think. I don't know why some people think of it as a gay drug when almost everyone here doing it is straight."

"I don't think that's true. That's just this gym, anyway. There's just a lot more straight people out there than there are gays."

"Well, yeah but every gay guy who gets on Blue Ribbon seems to act more masculine."

"Depends on how you define masculine," Chris said. "I don't think that is necessarily true."

"Well, I disagree with you," Drew said.

"And I disagree with you," Chris shot back.

"Well, ok bro. Just think about it."

"Already have thought about it, and I think we shouldn't," Chris said.

Well, that was that, Drew thought, and maybe for the best. Chris was probably right, he told himself.

Sex that night, however -- if you can even call grinding up against another guy's cock as you pushed him down into the pillows and kissed him 'sex' -- fucking Ryan and his smart fucking mouth, Drew thought. He'd really gotten inside his head. Drew shoved the thought of 'frotting' out of his mind once more as forcefully as he could.

Just one little word like that getting in his head and messing up his sense of erotic joy was so irksome. Drew thought it was better to know what other people thought than be totally oblivious, at least. Ryan's comment didn't totally bother him for that reason alone. It was better to know than not know.

In any case, sex with Chris felt tense tonight. It was all because of their minor difference of opinion on maybe trying Blue Ribbon, too. Tension in general with your boyfriend just plain sucked, Drew thought. All he'd put forth was 'maybe' and now this was the result. He knew from experience that sometimes after conflict, it took days to resolve any tension he had with Chris. They weren't passive aggressive people, and they weren't typical gay guys, sure. But they were only human.

That was the hard part of a relationship sometimes, Drew considered further, even as he leaned in to kiss Chris's neck and embrace him with a reassuring, warm hug. Unless you and your partner were totally on the same page, something always felt a bit off. It could be so hard to get two different people, however much they had in common, on the same page all the time.

Drew decided to go down on Chris and suck his cock, though he honestly wasn't in the mood to suck cock. He and Chris always both thought of the guy who gets down on his knees as more submissive and closer to what an actual gay guy would do. Who wouldn't? But tonight, Drew thought of sucking his boyfriend's cock as taking the manlier path in life.

Let Chris go ahead and think Drew was submitting to him if that made Chris happy, Drew though, and he hoped it would. But Drew knew he was only taking the man's path of pleasing his bitch. He didn't think of a guy as masculine as Chris as a bitch, of course, not really. Yet ever since he'd peed on Chris's leg, he kind of did think of Chris as his bitch, even if mostly in good humour. Anyhow, sucking Chris's cum down his throat as if he were in a servile mood would help Chris relax and smooth the waters.

As for the Blue Ribbon, well, Drew also felt like one of the things about being a man is that a man doesn't like to be told what to do. Drew didn't think most people liked to be told what to do for starters, and he knew a guy with a masculine attitude like himself sure didn't like it.

It wouldn't hurt to at least talk to some of the straight guys in the gym and ask about their experience with Blue Ribbon. Even the experience of asking about it would be an opportunity for Drew to act more like a serious gymgoer, he thought.

More like a straight guy, more like a man... Drew could still use more of that in the attitude he wanted to project, he figured. In fact, he started to think maybe it was only his own weakness, his own shy homosexuality or something, that had held him back from asking a lot earlier.

One thing Drew definitely knew at this point was that he did not want to be a weak or typical homosexual, not in any way that he could avoid. He didn't want to be reckless, either, but he wanted to do his best on making the most out of himself. Knowledge is important, he reminded himself.

Two days later, Drew made a beeline for the gym right after work, getting there well before Chris would even arrive to meet him. He had to talk up one of the guys on Blue Ribbon for once.

"So I've heard you're on the Nutjuice, man," Drew said, strolling up to Steve, who was one of the straightest and most musclar guys in the gym. Drew was speaking in as confident and casual a tone as he could, though Steve was certainly intimidating.

"Blue Ribbon Nutjuice is what the guys are saying, anyway," Drew continued. "I know it's kinda weird to ask, but do you mind if I ask you how it's been for you? Is it really as intense as they make it out to be?"

"I'm sure you've seen the videos, man," Steve said, racking his weight and turning over to look at Drew. "Yeah, it's intense. No regrets at all. You thinking of doing it?"

"I have been, to be honest. It's just a huge life change, and I know it's a permanent change. It's a really big deal, I've heard. I thought I'd better ask some people with real life experience with it."

"Well, I... did you know it's not actually totally permanent? But it's pretty expensive and complicated to undo, and they can't undo it all the way. I don't think anyone should ever go through with it unless they know for sure that they want it. But hey, how about this, I want to show you something. Follow me back to the locker room."

"Ok," Drew said almost stupidly, not sure what Steve had in mind.

When they got to the locker room, Steve turned around and pulled down his grey athletic shorts and underwear in one motion, his huge cock flopping right out in the stagnant locker room air.

"Whoa, that's not was I was looking for man," Drew said nervously. "I mean, I have a boyfriend," Drew started to say, almost stammering already.

"Well, you were curious, so here you are," Steve said gruffly. "I'm sure you've seen enough dicks in your time, haven't you?

"I guess so."

"This is what you grow into when you take the stuff. I think it looks totally natural to me, but you can judge for yourself. It's a natural look, just helped along by technology. It looks like I was born with a very generous endowment, as they say. That's what I wanted and that's what I got."

Drew, starting to get over his initial shock, now took time to scope out Steve's equipment. Damn, did his groin ever look hairy, and Drew wondered how much of that was the juice and how much was natural. Steve definitely had two big fuzzy nuts and a huge piece of meat. It certainly looked entirely real to Drew.

"It does look totallynatural. I mean speaking objectively, yeah it looks good. You did the full dosage then?"

"Sure did. Get me to nine inches when hard. I was at about five when I started, so that was a big difference. I did it all at once, just because I wanted the rush, though you can take it at any pace you want."

"Yeah, that's what I was thinking of doing. It's not hard to control?"

"Hey kid, of course it's hard to control. That's part of what it does. But my life's been going fine. My sex life is better than ever. Not every woman wants a dick this big. But there are probably more who do than don't, and the sensation of pumping shot after shot of cum into them with this equipment... there's nothing like it."

"You don't get erections at times that you shouldn't?"

"What man hasn't had erections in places and times that he shouldn't? Of course I do. You know that. That's a part of what Blue Ribbon does. You just have to get used to it."

"How did you get used to it?"

"Well buddy, I'm not sure you ever really do. Speaking of which... I just gotta say it because I'm feeling buzzed up... you're a good-looking guy. If I weren't straight, I'd let you suck me off right here."

Drew couldn't believe Steve was actually saying this to him, and he wanted to turn his back and walk out. As he looked he saw Steve's cock start to twitch, stiffen and rise.

Steve started to laugh. "See buddy? But it's no big deal. It's just a boner. You guys love boners. Do some of this stuff and you'll be getting boners all the time."

"Seriously? You're straight though, man? And you're boning in front of me anyway? That's wild."

"You've got a pretty mouth on you, Drew," Steve said, suddenly soft and tender, and then actually winking at Drew. "Almost like a girl. Bet you would slobber this pole if I asked you to. Bet you could wrap your tongue around this pole nicely."

To his horror, Drew actually felt his saliva start to trickle in his mouth. Why? From a straight guy? From a straight guy with a huge dick? From the size? From the Blue Ribbon? From the unexpected, almost surreal turn this gym sesh was suddenly taking?

This not what Drew had been expecting at all. Blue Ribbon had to be a lot stronger than he expected, and he was thinking not only should he not get involved but he had better get out of here.

Drew didn't like feeling the way he suddenly felt. It wasn't fair to Chris, and it wasn't right at all even if this isn't what he'd asked for. That his mouth actually had started to water made him feel guilty. He could feel his pulse and his dick starting to plump in his pants. It was such a confusing, sudden rush of blood, really. What were these feelings? Did it mean so much to him? Did it excite him so much that a muscular, powerful straight guy like Steve was acting this way, and all from a drug -- a drug that he had only been curious about?

"I... thank you, but I have a boyfriend and he'll probably be here soon. I've really gotta go. You don't seriously hook up with guys, do you?"

"Of course not!" Steve said, as if he was being offended. And just like that, Steve was yanking up his shorts. His shorts were now tented obscenely with his hard meat bulging forward in them.

"I was just fucking with you, kid. Figured a guy like you would get a kick out of it. Yeah, it makes you horny, but it doesn't turn you gay. Jesus Christ."

"Don't tell anyone we talked, ok? Or that you showed me anything. I don't know if I'm going to do that stuff or not."

"Of course I don't want anyone to know I showed you my dick!" Steve answered. Then, softening his town, Steve continued, "It's a nice dick, though, and don't you forget it."

"It was," Drew said, just wanting to placate Steve and get out of there, though he immediately felt stupid and gay for saying that.

Steve was now smiling at him again and grabbing his cock and balls through his shorts with one hand firmly, almost as if to taunt Drew with how powerful his package was.

"Feels great in my hand, kid," Steve said, now lifting up one arm and doing a biceps flex.

"Keep at it in the gym, too," Steve went on as Drew started to turn and leave. "You'll get there. I was a twerp of a man once, too, believe it or not. Hard work pays off."

"Will do, bro," Drew said lamely, feeling so embarrassed by how intimidated he felt by Steve and his reactions to it -- lust, fear, timidity, guilt, awkwardness... he couldn't even tell for sure what he felt, but it was a mixture of all those things.

He really had to go and collect himself. At least he had real life experience with Blue Ribbon now, he told himself. He didn't know what to think, but he suddenly sure was glad he was who he was and grateful to be alive. He was just a regular natty guy with a lot of options in life. He was glad that Chris would soon be here, too.

As Drew almost stormed back into the gym in his hurry to get out of the locker room, he noticed again the plumpness in his cock and balls. It was embarrassing that Steve had turned him on like that, but probably not that surprising. Drew wasn't plumped enough that anyone would probably notice, at least, and he had bigger worries right now than that anyway.

His mouth was wet with spit and he couldn't help but wonder, as it flashed through his mind seemingly against his will -- since he had a boyfriend and sure didn't need the image -- well, what if he had played along with Steve and gone along with it?

Would Steve actually have let him slurp his dick right in the locker room? Does Blue Ribbon actually make you that crazy with lust? Does it get you crossing hetero and homo lines? He'd have to look it up on the internet later. He felt like he should know this stuff already.

And what Drew liked even less, and what made him feel immediately guilty to even consider, was that he felt like he was had just left a potential life experience on the table.

He loved his boyfriend and would never cheat on him, but damn if there weren't a lot of men... real men, masculine men... who might have taken Steve up on his offer just a little bit, or at least not acted like such a scared and stammering pussy about it.

He could have played along with some cocky jargon, at least. He could have at least had fun with how much he'd turned on this straight man instead of panicking and running.

Drew wasn't feeling like a man right now, though. He was just feeling confused. Two things Drew definitely didn't like were feeling weakness or feeling like he might be missing out on something.

Steve would be at the gym again, true, but he might not get the chance again for any wild interaction like that. And he definitely would never get a chance to replay what had just happened. He'd acted like a dork. He hadn't even really learned all that much about Blue Ribbon, when it came down to it. Maybe the internet was the better way to do that, at least.

Well, it was a learning experience, Drew told himself. That in and of itself was progress.

Chris would be here soon, and maybe they could even cut their gym time short and go home and have some fun with each other. At least that way Drew's mouth full of saliva wouldn't totally go to waste, he told himself. That put a smile on his face.

Having a boyfriend was the main joy in Drew's life, not the what-ifs and what-might-be of drugs, experiences or whatever felt more hardcore. He wasn't about to screw it up, and suddenly he was feeling proud of himself for having resisted whatever his body might have been thinking when Steve made such a rapid, unexpected pass at him. Still, it was embarrassing how it affected him... but he'd come out on top, right? Even in a dorky, run-for-the-hills way?

Drew was already trying to think of how to turn today's dork water into wine for the rest of the night. Maybe he'd make up for the weird moment with Steve by seeing how far he could shoot cum into Chris's mouth tonight... could he do it to Chris from three feet away? From four?

He'd think of something special for his boyfriend or to get his own mind off what had happened with Steve, anyhow. Right now, Drew still just felt mostly annoyed at what had happened, almost like he'd cheated on his boyfriend in a way, though of course he hadn't.

This was living, anyhow, wasn't it?

Shooting cum into his bitch's mouth from four feet away... yeah, Drew wanted to try that. It was already a solid plan in his mind, one he planned on doing tonight no matter how tired out from the day's events and the gym he might be.

Drew also decided he'd have to start giving Chris more praise about what a jock stud he was and what he was becoming.

Praise was what a leader does, even if he knows (if only to himself) that his boyfriend is actually the bitch in the relationship. They were both getting stronger all the time. Drew knew it. Things were always getting better all the time.

Ryan wasn't going to win, Drew decided. In fact, Ryan had already lost. None of the other guys were going to win.

Drew was better than them all, he decided -- young, hot, and in love with a hot boyfriend -- and he knew he could do better still. There was so much more self-improvement for him to do, and he was looking forward to getting going on working even harder at bettering himself.

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arcadefloorvibes · 8 months

Text

I don't have a title that I do for this anymore so uhhh

Hiya this is the text post, I am about to give a full rundown on how my partner and I have started dating because

my blog my house

I haven't been able to talk about this in depth with anyone except my siblings who do not care for the amount I am about to type and

my partner follows me on tumblr so kinda can't without it being blantantly obvious its about them (hi)

So this is going to be fun for me because i get to talk about this and this is going to be fun for my partner who pretty much got the summary of this

Quick thing: Partner will be referred to as Partner due to the fact I'm pretty sure his name isn't on here but I assume I will be told after this and Partner goes by He/they so I will be swapping

And now the readmore :D this is like a week and a half of chaos with additional 8 or so weeks before so we're back at it again with the long relationship posts nothing has changed

So to start this all off, you're going to need a bit more context on the mess that was us getting together.

We met through our dnd group, so immediately we're nerds off the bat and then became closer friends after we found out we both catch the same train from the same stop to go to dnd

We're also both very physically affectionate, which did make it difficult to work out whether we liked each other platonically or not later, but we'd hug and talk for an hour each way on the train

My partner is also an affectionate drunk and so within the first week or so of playing dnd, there were sweet messages in the group chat.

Somewhere along the line, more personalised messages go into my dms and eventually my email because I just thought "yea that makes sense"

About two or three weeks into dnd, we both decide to meet up in the city and go shopping because he knew manga stores and I didnt.

The shopping trip was fun! We got manga, I showed them the underground bookstore, we got ice cream (that i paid for, this will become important later) and at this point we'd been out for about 4 hours.

I, normally go shopping with my 3 younger brothers and therefore use "We" a lot. This does not work when you are no longer with your siblings

So being the genius that I am the checkout conversation goes as usual

"Do you need a bag?" "Oh no thanks, we've got one" (gestures to Partner)

And the SECOND we are out of the store, they just go "she probably thinks we're together" and 'Im already internally screaming at my social blunder so i just say "Yea we seem to get that a lot"

Then on the bus home the conversation turns to "if you ever need a fake boyfriend let me know because I'd do a great job at that"

And so it becomes a running joke that when we're out together, we look like a couple, because we kinda did, the hugs, they'd hold my hands when they were cold (highly unromantically mind you) and then the looks we'd get kept the bit running

Then during other conversations throughout the 2 months we knew each other, we had literally said we don't know if these feelings are platonic or romantic because we weren't used to it, but then the other would neither confirm nor deny, there was also a pickup line bit he did for a while and also pointing out that "its like the universe wants us to be together" with the amount of coincidences

Then came the second Monday of August, Partner had just gotten SIGNIFICANTLY fucked up on drinks and was not doing great, i don't remember much of the day but i do remember being very worried so i wrote at like 12 am a really long email about how important they were to me, it took me about half hour to write it

And then i open discord, and there's a message from him at 12:03 that basically read

Hey, i love you but like yknow in a friend way (idk discuss with sober me)

...yknow. after i just sent a massive email about how much I love them.

So i figured we're going to talk about this at some point, so i should just think about it! Yknow! Imagine a universe where we're together!

And i did

And I really liked it

And alllllllllll the denial I'd had over that past few months just for a little bit disappeared

So i did not sleep well that night, understandably, and i wake up the next morning to read what was basically:

Haha drunk me is fun to read, no need to discuss lol

...once again. Not confirming or denying.

And I'm just like okay I'll go back to thinking about you platonically and it just didn't work it just straight up didn't work because it just felt like the same denial I'd had previously

It is Tuesday now, I have early morning classes, so i went to class, i overthought, i denied and i tried so hard to get myself to like another guy in my class that i thought was cute but all i could find was more reasons to like Partner

So i get home after having what is essentially a 17 hour day and I get on call with my friends and we're just doing the usual of watching Doctor Who while screaming at our 3d program and I don't remember a lot of how we got to the point we did but we had cameras on, I had mine on but turned off so I couldn't see myself.

This part is fun because apparently Partner doesn't remember this but!

It was just a small thing of looking at everyone and one of our friends points out that you could see me in Partner's monitor but just like in the corner because of how the camera was angled and i reacted with "Ack!" Which prompted:

Partner: Whats wrong with you being on screen?

Me: I dont like looking at myself

Partner: Why? Youre beautiful

Me: ...Thank you...

And so they just tilt the camera away so i can't see myself and good news, my camera cant pick up my blushing but im just kind of losing it a little

I dont use "beautiful" for myself, its not a word that I think applies to me. Theres "cool" and "handsome" and "cute" and occasionally "pretty" but I've never liked when I was called beautiful growing up

And in that small moment, i really really liked the word, i still like hearing the word from them honestly, still don't think it really applies but sometimes i see it

At the time, this was NOT HELPING, especially paired with the coincidence of that day's wordle being "Lover" i was maybe going insane

Wednesday the ASMR bit starts.

Me and the asmr bit had a complicated relationship, on one hand its very nice, on the other hand i was trying to deny and this was also NOT HELPING. The asmr was basically compliments and the occasional ara ara

Thursday i make a playlist to try and focus on literally anything and i write down all my feelings out of hope that on the train the next day i would be fine

I get my hugs on the train, i get my random headscritches, we go shopping, i buy us cream puffs, they mention this is like a date, i dont confirm or deny, there's a small moment on the tram with a hug and a "haha wouldn't it be funny if you did the anime thing of falling on me?", and then because we have time we go op shopping

I got to learn a lot more about Partner's fashion tastes (alt) and i get to talk about mine (punk) and I'm talking about how i want a suit jacket but none ever fit me and as i say that they pull out one that looks my size

And like the fucking genius that i am im like "okay hold these for a sec" and i give them my bags while i try on the jacket

"I'm doing the boyfriend hold thing right now lol"

And I looked at them and just for a second I considered confirming and then i didnt and just did a neutral "yea my bad..."

And then I said "we" at the register again and I did acknowledge that to which the response was "At this point, it's probably easier if we just started dating, there's so many signs the universe keeps giving"

My response was "yea..." but in a way that didn't confirm or deny

Friday was my birthday, my body decided to just keep filling with adrenaline every time I thought about them, I had a few shots of vodka and accidentally told my siblings what happened

Saturday and Sunday I kept thinking about it at work and overthinking and rethinking

Monday I was on call talking the whole time, the asmr bit continues, the feelings don't go away, a conversation doesn't happen, its like everything is the same as always. There's talk of black lipstick and eyeshadow, the nerves get stronger

Tuesday was when I thought maybe they actually liked me back, there were "I love you"s, I was kind of flirting back maybe idk, and I decided that these feelings weren't going to go away and I should at least ask to work out if this is platonic or romantic or otherwise I will go insane

Wednesday I'm just thinking about what to say and nothing is working because even writing this now i still cant predict anything they say so i made up about 20 or so different ways of asking, the black lipstick couldn't be found and so i was a little more safe

Thursday. Thursday was planned to meet up early since their bus arrives earlier than i do so i walk up to the train station, playlist on loop, rehearsing and rehearsing and i get there to watch them arrive on the bus.

I like that image in my head, the fact that we both saw each other and waved, the massive smiles and oh my god the eyeshadow was giving me a heartattack. I have like 4 selfies of the eyeshadow now and it still gets me

We talk like always, I'm trying not to stare, I'm trying to form the words but every time i think I've got them the silence stops. We get on the train, the hug occurs and the week before I'd initiated a handhold so i was just there talking and thinking and terrified of fucking this up but it would've been worse if i left it.

4 stops until we get off and a silence stays long enough for me to at least try

Me: Okay so I told myself i was going to say something because otherwise it would get worse and this is really embarrassing but I'm going to try Partner: Okay...? A sigh and a breath Me: so you remember the message you sent on Monday? Partner: oh... yeah i do... Me: well i figured... we should talk about that...

And i explain a much shorter rendition of that Monday and veryyyy slowly his ears go red and it starts to spread:

Me: so like I'm fine with either, i just need to know what we're doing Partner: I wish i could give you an answer but I don't know either

That was not in the script so we just kind of sat and thought, doing the kind of shocked laugh thing and I'm just observing reactions while trying to think of what to say, I'm watching them fight their own denial in real-time

So i just said "I'm going to explain my past week and a half and if see if that helps"

And i explain pretty much all of that above and extra things, giving them a bit of time to process after each thing, noticing the denial again and kept going because all I could think was if I was going to get an answer I wanted one where we were being honest.

After explaining all that, and telling him to stop apologising and me apologising for dropping this all at once since they'd gone totally red and were shaking a bit, I let the silence sit for a while, 2 stops to go, before i said "Fuck it, I'm going to hold your hand properly and you can tell me how that goes"

And we both really liked it, and we held hands the rest of the trip and i initiated more hand holding as we walked around the train station. I then had to go to class but we planned to take the train home together, normally we didn't do that

So we got donuts and held hands again, I got the asmr bit irl so I did lose a lot of the control I'd had earlier in the day as now I was the red one

And that's it! that's how we started dating!

As of publishing this, our first date and week together is tomorrow and it's been incredible so far and they already know how much they mean to me because I keep saying it and I'm going to talk as much about my partner as possible because why not and also I know for an absolute fact they'll read this so

I love you, you're amazing, we're so bad at this, I hope we can keep trying until we get it right and I will keep writing until I can't write anymore

And that concludes the post! ah! I have a partner! the progress of the past few years is insane and I'm learning so much about myself while I'm at uni and if I've grown this much in one trimester I'm so excited to see what the next 3 years bring

And final note: this post is 2.4k words :D

#arcade speaks #chaos tag

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joshslater · 3 years

Text

Eastern Tennessee

Similar stories and bonus material on my Patreon.

I was shocked and devastated when dad told us the news. He had gotten a new surveying job good for at least five years, and since there aren't a lot of career advancements for geologists he had taken the offer immediately. So we would all move to some shit town in East Tennessee. Mom would teach kids whatever hadn't been banned knowledge by the state, my little sister would continue elementary there, and I would spend my high school years in some backwater school with barely any students. I distinctly remember staring at the remainder of the mash on my plate, and how unappetizing it had turned as the news was told to me. They wanted to make all the preparations before they told us to "not worry us" in case it fell through.

I asked if I could be excused and left the table, the parents, the plate, the mash and walked to my room without waiting for a reply. Perhaps there was one. I didn't care. I just had to talk to Timothy. I just lied in bed with a headset on and talked and cursed and cried with him on the other side of our private discord chat room. They didn't know I had a boyfriend. They didn't even know I was gay, and I saw no point in telling them either. We wouldn't stay, I couldn't bring Tim with me, and given where we were heading I probably couldn't be openly gay either. It was just best if no one knew. We both knew this would be the end for us. We would be living states apart during our most hormone-filled years. If we still felt the same for each other in three years, once it was time for college, then perhaps we could try to get together, but I thought it was just cruel to keep him waiting while we grew apart. He didn't see it like that of course. He wanted to be the harbor I could sail back to after three years of exile, but I've read enough Greek mythology to know how that ends. Black sails and drownings.

They'd done a lot of work behind our backs, our parents, so only six weeks later, just after school closed for summer we packed our shit into the back of a semi. Our last night at the only house I've ever lived in was spent sleeping on the floor. Early next morning we packed ourselves into our car and begun our three-day journey to East Tennessee. By the time we arrived at our much bigger house and much smaller town the moving company had already placed our stuff in the different rooms. Still in boxes though, except for the furniture. I didn't go to bed until three in the morning, and probably tossed around all night unable to sleep. I must have, because mum woke me up around nine.

I went with dad to town to check it out. We of course had a long list of stuff we needed to get, but I wanted to see what stores and fast food places were around. It wasn't the local businesses that caught my eye though. Everywhere I looked I just saw smoking hot guys. Tight wrangler blue jeans, cut off shirts or flannels, and Ford or Chevy ball caps. Most of all though people had the kind of look you get from working outdoors. Tanned skin, sun-bleached hair, and lean muscles. I followed dad around all the shops on our list, hoping no one would notice my boner.

That's when I decided what I had to do: go undercover as a redneck. Two-thirds of my wardrobe had to go. I didn't know if my west coast apparel would go down as hip or attract bullying, so I spent the next week looking at guys my age and really taking note of what they were wearing. What brands? What colors? What haircuts? When I felt confident I knew the essence of the look I begged mum for new clothes, without telling her why. She relented and allowed me a few items, so I could combine them with what I already had to pass as local.

The day after, luckily after the nearest barber had made an excellent job in turning my well-styled but now far too long hair into a hair helmet, I found out that a neighbor one street away was about my age. Dylan was one year older and his summer plans had fallen apart. His best friend had to leave to visit some ill relative, so he was happy to show me around. When his friend Jackson came back a week later we all spent the rest of the summer doing things together. Swimming, basket, trekking. All things I hated doing back home and suck at, but somehow they thought it made it even funnier, and they were really proud whenever I progressed.

I couldn't believe how lucky I was when school started. Not only didn't Dylan mind driving me there, in fact he suggested it, but knowing a sophomore as a freshman basically made me bully-proof. Not that I really had to worry. We were all new to high school, and only about half of my class knew each other from before. We had people from the creeks and shitholes all around town bussed in as well. No one even suspected I wasn't from nearby until we had to introduce ourselves. Some people were excited and wanted to know more about how life was at the coast, but in the end it wasn't a big deal. It wasn't until I got home, reliving the day in my head, I realized all that time with Dylan and Jackson had turned my accent into passable enough East Tennessee local.

The school was small enough that you could basically join whatever sports team you signed up for, at least as freshman. It was more a question of what training times were compatible. I ended up joining the football and soccer teams. Somehow soccer turned out to be the more competitive out of the two, with the school soccer team doing well against other schools. I hadn't expected that.

Once it was getting close to thanksgiving Jackson asked me if I was interested in some extra cash. One of the stores needed more people for restocking and was desperate to fill it ahead of the holidays. The schedule clashed with soccer practice, but it was probably wise to stick to just one team anyway. And the 70 lbs repeated lifting requirement promised some bonus exercise that would be wasted on the soccer.

It wasn't all roses and touchdowns though. Nothing is as unguarded as the shit talk in the locker room after a loss, so I got to know what most of the guys really thought. I can think of several individuals who would beat me bloody if they knew they had been in a shower room with a gay. What I heard from some of the real employees at the store was even worse, narrow-minded exclusion politics. I wasn't even sure how Dylan would react. I decided to follow the plan, get good grades so I could get far away, and do my best to blend in. Learn to ride with Coleson, shoot AR-15 with Eric's dad, get the best body I could, and count down to leaving.

That was three years ago, before I was accepted into college. I considered bringing all the old clothes with me when coming out of the closet, but I realized they no longer fit in any sense of the word. I decided to show up at the dorm wearing the state national dress, tight wrangler blue jeans, cutoff T, and ballcap. It's good I did, because no matter how fucking hard I try I can't speak anything but rural East Tennessee. The disguise got stuck. What I didn't expect was the reception when I went to the first student gay party. The guy on bouncer duty was very hesitant to let me in, fearing I would start some homophobic shit the first chance I got, but once inside it was a different thing. Turns out quite a lot of them would fancy being fucked by a quarterback while being spoken to in southern.

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nojey · 3 years

Text

give me love

feral boys x gn!reader

genre: fluff pronouns: they / them word count: 1.5k words warning(s): none (if you think there are, lmk!) artwork by: @/raytoresia on twitter!

synopsis: very similar to their love languages, but rather than how they'd like to receive love it's how they give love

dreamwastaken / clay

how clay gives love: giving gifts

i think sometimes he doesn't word things in the way he truly means it so when he gives you gifts he feels like it kind of makes up for it?

he isn't too affectionate with his words unless he's like straight up flirting with you

so he'll give you gifts to balance it out

clay <3: come outside :]

looking at the text, your eyebrows furrowed in confusion

you had just seen him a couple hours ago before heading back to your own apartment

nonetheless you still went down to see what surprise he had for you

once you reached the doors of the lobby you saw clay standing there, hiding something behind his back

but you were distracted by how cold it was, regretting not bringing a jacket

your hands went to your arms trying to warm yourself up

clay saw this, put whatever he was hiding down, and took the hoodie he was wearing off to put on you

"you're going to get cold though," you said.

"you're going to get cold too," he said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"well thank you," you said, "what're you doing here?"

he suddenly remembered the gifts he got you and turned around to grab them

turning around quickly, he smiled at you

"for you," he said, holding out roses and chocolate covered strawberries

your heart warmed, knowing that he thought of you

"what are these for?" you asked with a smile on your face, reaching out to hold them

"i just wanted to get you something," he smiled back

"thank you," you said and chuckled. "you coming inside?"

he looked at the time on his phone and shrugged

"why not"

georgenotfound / george

how george gives love: acts of service

we all know that george isn't the most affectionate person

so he does his best to give you love by doing things for you

sighing, you opened the door to your apartment that you shared with your boyfriend

when you left for work, you didn't have the time to clean the apartment up so you were dreading coming home to a messy apartment

but when you opened the door, your apartment was spotless

the surprised look on your face made your boyfriend chuckle and you looked towards him

"did you clean the whole apartment?" you asked him, putting away your shoes and bag

"yeah," he replied.

"thank you," you said with gratitude in your voice

you walked to the couch and sat down, happy you get to rest rather than clean

soon enough you were falling asleep

when you woke up, a pillow was behind your head, blanket across your body and you were now laying down rather than sitting up

you looked around and saw george in the kitchen cooking dinner

"babe?" you called out

"yeah?" he called back

you wrapped the blanket around you and waddled to the kitchen to rest your head on his shoulder as he cooked

"you're cooking dinner too?"

"yeah, i saw you fall asleep and i don't think we've had a home cooked meal in a while so i just thought i'd cook," he explained

you wrapped your arms around him and kissed his shoulder

you were beyond happy to be with someone like him

sapnap

how sapnap gives love: physical touch

i think while sapnap was visiting karl it kinda showed that sapnap is preeetty affectionate

when he gets excited he'll reach out toward you to share his excitement

when either he or you aren't feeling the best he'll pull you down on a couch or bed and just cuddle with you

"babe!" sapnap yelled to you from his bedroom

"yes?!" you yelled back

"come here!"

you got up from the couch in the living room and walked to his room

opening the door, you asked, "yes?"

"come sit with me, chat misses you," he said

"are you sure you don't miss me?" you chuckled

"what? me? never? i ain't no simp," he said, trying to act tough,

"mhm, okay" you said, walking to sit next to him

"facecam?" you asked.

"yup"

"what're you doing?" you asked

"playing bedwars," he said, joining a lobby

"team or no?"

"by myself," he said

you nodded and payed attention to how he was playing

it reached the point where sapnap and one other person was left

"you got it babe," you said, trying to encourage him

"mm, i know" he said, being very cocky, clearly he didn't need the encouragement

he then threw a fireball at the other person while crossing a bridge but the other person block clutched

sapnap groaned and ran over to where they were to kill them

he had already gotten their bed earlier to he just needed to kill them

they were both hitting each other and sapnap wasn't making a sound because of how focused he was

and once he got the "victory" screen he jumped in his chair and reached towards you, holding your arm and pulling you into a hug

"babe, i won!" he said, a smile occupying his face

"i know!" you said, a smile occupying your face with happiness for him

karl jacobs

how karl gives love: physical touch

this was quite obvious

karl is definitely an affectionate person

doesn't matter what either of you are doing

he'll love being in your presence and keeping at least a hand on you

it can be holding your hand, resting it on your thigh, keeping his pinky wrapped around yours, resting his head on your shoulder, anything

you and karl were at the mall, looking for something he needed for his stream

he was walking a bit ahead of you, though he didn't notice at first

he reached out to grab your hand but felt nothing

so he looked around and saw you were walking a bit behind him

he grabbed your pinky with his and continued walking

he finally reached the store he was looking for and walked faster, kinda dragging you along with him

you chuckled and walked a bit faster so you were next to him

"you were going a bit fast there, silly," you said.

"well, maybe you were going too slow, ever thought of that?" he challenged

you stopped walking, looked at him with an expressionless face, let go of his pinky, and walked in without him

"wait no!" he called after you

you were being petty and decided to give him the silent treatment

"babe, talk to me" he exaggerated out

you were just looking around the store till you found something you like and brought it to the cash register

karl followed you, getting what he wanted and putting it down in front of the cashier with your stuff

he rested his head on your shoulder and grabbed your pink with his

but you didn't wrap yours around his

he huffed out in frustration and payed for both of your things

you both walked out with his pinky wrapped tightly around yours

he seemed to have enough of your games and grabbed your shoulders and forced you to face him

"will you please just hold my pinky!" he said in distress

you laughed and held his pinky then brought him to the food court

quackity / alex

how alex gives love: remembering the little things

he may seem like the careless type but when it comes to someone he loves he definitely cares

he may not show it a lot but whenever you bring up something you like alex makes a mental note of it

you were finishing up an assignment you had that was due at midnight but you were starting to get hungry

you were thinking of calling your boyfriend to see if he wanted to get food but you didn't want to bother him'

so you sucked it up and continued with finishing your assignment

though, a knock on your front door distracted you from your work

you got up from your desk and looked through the peephole to see your boyfriend standing there with your favorite fast food

you opened the door and smiled at him

"how did you know?" you asked, letting him in

"i remember you telling me you had a big assignment to work on and i know you don't really feed yourself so,"

you laughed and hugged him, "thank you," "you remember my order?" you asked, looking through the food and seeing that he didn't mess up a single thing

got all the right sauces and remembered to not get any pickles on it

"yeah, i've remembered since the first time you ordered, nimrod" he said, insulting you so he didn't seem so sappy

"well thanks, doofus" you said, kissing his cheek

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nishisun · 3 years

Text

suna rintaro is NOT a genius.

summary: you loved the idea of soulmates. suna rintaro didn’t. it isn’t that hard to put two and two together to realize that maybe people with different opinions on things don’t belong together.

part 2

a/n: this was literally supposed to be a series, i gave up on it because i just didn’t like the way it turned out. it used to be called “out of my league” and this was the intro. i also renamed it. just emptying drafts!! please don’t get confused with the random timeskip, once again, this was a part of a series i never ended up posting😭

WARNING!!: suggestive themes, mentions of death, idk kinda angsty but tell me if i missed anything

Soulmates. Whatever the hell that means. The idea of soulmates is something I truly don’t understand. It’s bullshit, honestly. It’s all-pervasive.

My mother always told me I'd eventually find "the one.” I used to believe that when I was younger of course. But in my opinion? It’s all cliches. It's unhelpful, and it's certainly not true. Destiny is an excuse for the weak. Why do you think most marriages end in divorce? It's 'cause people who believe they are “destined to be" assume everything will fall into place without any effort. I don't appreciate people pontificating bullshit like that just to make me feel better, especially if they haven't found their "soulmate" themselves. My sister once told me, “People who believe in soulmates are more likely to break up and encounter more difficulty in their relationship, which will lead them to give up on one another eventually.”

I sure do believe that.

My mother is a prime example. Fumeiko Suna, my dear mother. Well, she clearly hasn’t found hers. I found out when I came home after a tedious day of school in 5th grade and found my dear mother on the floor crying, with bruises all over her face and a busted lip.

Initially, I thought a burglar had broken into our home once again, but if that were the case then there would’ve been missing furniture. But there wasn’t.

In fact, the place seemed cleaner than usual. When I ran up to her and asked her what had happened, there he was. The devil himself. My father. He reeked of alcohol, and I could detect his shadow towering over me. It’s funny how that I think of it. I used to fear that son of a bitch. Now, I’m way taller than him, and hate his guts. I turned around to see a faux-sympathetic smile plastered on his face.

He explained how my mother was being “clumsy” and had fell and busted her lip on one of the corners of the kitchen table and when I turned back around to face my mother, she smiled gently and nodded in agreement. She didn’t say anything after that.

It was then I realized my father had beat my mother to a pulp.

Long story short, when I found it was my father, sure, I was frightened. In fact, I remember going into my siblings’ rooms to inform them, they shrugged it off and told me that dad had been doing it for a while now.

Over time, when my dad had found out that I was aware, he didn't mind beating the absolute shit out of my mother in front of all three of us. This was when my burning hatred for that man started. Nobody in the house even attempted to stop him. I did a few times, though. He took all his anger out on me. At least my mom had a break for the day.

I almost pitied my mother. Almost. Maybe if she was strong enough to leave him, then yeah, I’d feel bad. But she still decides to stay with his sorry ass. It’s pathetic. It’s unrequited love or whatever you call it. How could she still love that asshole?

I mean, I’m not even going to lie, I’m an asshole too, but I’m definitely not my dad. I would never want to be him. He’s not someone I looked up to, he doesn’t do anything inspirational. He’s a businessman. He travels the majority of the time, and I’m pretty sure my mom invites men over when he’s gone. I don’t care enough to find out. But if I ever hear some guy rearranging my mom’s guts, I’ll kill him. I don’t even blame my mother. What she’s doing is wrong, she knows it and so do both of my older siblings. But they don't seem to care so why should I?

Who knows why she just won’t leave him. Maybe it’s cause they don’t want to ruin how people view our “picture perfect” family. I wonder what they’d say. “I thought the Suna’s were the ideal family? I guess not.”

My dad would probably lose it if he heard that.

Both my mother and my father are the cause of this broken family of mine. They never fed me or any of my siblings the love we always desired when we were younger. They never came to any of my volleyball games when I was younger. They never applauded me for the little recitals we’d have in class in primary school. They were never even here for most of my childhood. They always put money first and left us with the housekeepers. Hell, the housekeepers probably know me better than my own parents.They failed as parents. I despise them for it. They’re most likely the reason I am the way I am, but to be honest?

I don’t give a fuck.

In fact, I should thank them! Because of how they “raised” me, i’m extremely blunt, which is why people respect me. I use the hatred I have for my family and take it out on people and no, I’m not proud of that. I may be a heartless asshole, but I like that people fear me. The hell? Does that make me a sadist? Either way, people know to never fuck with me cause I’d fuck their shit up. I’ve overheard many people say it’s ‘cause of my privilege. It probably is. Money can’t buy happiness, but it sure can buy you many other things.

If my parents were broke, I’d probably be expelled from school by now. Abuse of alcohol and drugs are forbidden on school property. I don’t even take them at school, I somewhat care about my education and health, but sometimes I just need to blow some steam. Even if I did, nobody’s gonna say shit since my dad is the head of Japan’s board of education. How did his ass even get there?

Call me lonely or cynical. Maybe I am. But how is that a bad thing? Why do people need a significant other to rely on? What, a soulmate is just going to turn my life upside down then suddenly bring me happiness? Pfft, I’m gonna need actual proof that shit like that still happens. I’ve only seen shit like that in fairy tale movies. It’s whatever, though. I can live with being alone. I’ve basically been alone my whole life and it isn’t as bad as people make it.

You loved the idea of having a soulmate. The thought of meeting someone who just understood you, accepted you for who you were, and most importantly, loved you excited you. You couldn’t wait to meet your soulmate.

But recently, you weren’t sure soulmates existed.

When your older sister, Akira, came into your room and burst into tears, it frightened you. Your older sister, the one who’d always provide you advice on relationships and how to keep one was in your room sobbing hysterically because hers hadn’t worked out.

“I just can't believe it,” she sobbed.

You couldn’t believe it either. Your sister had recently gotten engaged to her boyfriend of 9 years. They started dating at the age of 15 and managed to make things work out even after high school, and out of all those years of dating, they never broke up. Not even once.

They’d go on romantic dates on Saturdays and they’d always write love letters to one another every day, just to remind one another of how grateful they were to have each other in their lives. On Halloween, they’d dress up as fictional characters from TV shows and books and take cute selfies and bake a bunch of sweets. They’d invite you to come bake with them, but you would politely deny. You knew they were only offering so you wouldn’t feel left out, which you appreciated.

Of course, they’d argue every now and then, but at the end of the day, they always managed to talk things out. Oh to have a relationship like theirs. They were everything you wanted to have in a relationship and more.

“I really thought he was the one for me, y’know?” No, you don’t know. But that doesn't matter. What mattered was cheering your sister up.

“Maybe he wasn’t ‘the one’ Akira, and that’s okay! People come and go all the time, soulmates come and go all the time as well-”

“You still believe soulmates are real, huh?” she let out a humorless laugh and sniffed her nose, “What If I missed my one shot at love, Y/N? What if I lost my soulmate?”

That’s some deep shit.

Now that you think about it, were soulmates real? Soulmates come and go, yes, you’re aware of that, but even though they leave, it’s always temporary. Soulmates always find a way back to their other half, the piece that completes them.

Your dad never made it back to your mother.

He died in a car crash 5 years ago. Your mother and father had been arguing because she claimed your father was cheating on her since he wouldn’t let her check his phone.

You were 13 at the time. Your sister Akira was accompanying you in your room, listening to them arguing back and forth with one another. There was furniture flying across the room, glass breaking, and both of them throwing curses at each other. You were scared. They never argued in front of you and your sister. They'd bicker sometimes, but it was never anything too deep.

Eventually, your father had enough of your mother’s false accusations, and out of anger, he packed his things and left home. For weeks. It wasn’t until one of your uncles called your mother and broke the news. She didn’t take it very well.

Late 2012-early 2013.

Not many people came to your father’s funeral, his family didn’t like the fact that he and your mother were together, they said your mother was trouble, but your dad still stayed with her, even if that meant it would completely destroy the bond he had with his family. Now that’s true love, you had thought. Only your mother, Akira, the Sunas, your uncle, and you, of course, attended the funeral.

It hurt a lot. It hurt when your mother informed both your grandparents on your mother and father’s side and all they could do is put the blame on her. It hurt how they had claimed you, Akira and your mother were a hindrance to your dear father’s well-being. How could they be so cruel at a time like this?

That was the first time you ever questioned if soulmates were real. Maybe they fell in love at the wrong time? Who knows.

After your father’s passing, Fumiko Suna, your mother’s best friend, was there to help your family out financially. Your mother couldn’t even find the motivating to go to work. Your mother and Fumiko have been best friends since junior high, they’ve literally been inseparable ever since. In fact, after they both got married, they decided to live right next to each other.

Your mom didn’t cope with your father’s death very well; none of you did. But your mom had it the worst.

She would cope with alcohol and clubbing which would always result in her bringing different men home almost every night. You didn’t say much about it, you thought it would be selfish to since that’s what seemed to make your mother feel better about herself, but your sister hated it. She was already 19 and in college at the time, but when she visited and found out that your mother had basically been neglecting you, she was furious.

“Seriously, mom? This is what you’re gonna do while your 13-year-old daughter is in her room having a literal mental breakdown because of your childish behavior?” Your sister had barged into your mother’s room when she thought you were asleep, she was screaming loud.

“You’re interrupting something important, Akira. You know better than to-”

“Oh, shut the hell up mom. You’re the last person on earth to be saying shit like that.”

“Well, if you’re done, you can leave my room now. You’re being disrespectful, and this behavior is not tolerated!” Your mother was screaming now. The man in the bed covering his body under the covers and looking back and forth between Akira and your mother.

“Sakiya, maybe you should hear your daughter out-”

“Not now.” your mother scarcely interrupted the man, eye contact never leaving Akira. “Y/N has never complained about this when you were in college. She knows this is my way of coping, why can’t you understand that too!”

Akira scoffed. “So what, getting fucked by random strangers you find on the filthy streets is your way of coping? Getting wasted every damn night to the point where Y/N has to drag you up to bed is okay with you? Do you even know how much this is affecting Y/N? Did you even bother asking her how she felt? I hate breaking it to you mom, but you need serious help.”

“You selfish child!” Your mother screamed, grabbing a towel and wrapping it around her body, getting up from the bed. “How dare you say that to your own mother?”

“I’m only telling the truth! If you’re the mother, then it’s your job to be taking care of Y/N, not neglecting her. When’s the last time you’ve engross in an actual conversation with her when you were fully sober?”

Your mother was silent. She quickly walked up to Akira and grabbed her by the hair and slammed her headfirst against the wall.

“You’ve got a big mouth! Maybe I should wash it with soap like I did back in the day, hm?” Akira was attempting to push her mother away, but she wouldn’t let go of her grip. The man that was still on your mother’s bed was in panic, yelling her name, which didn’t have any effect. He might as well stop.

"Look," Akira mumbled, struggling to get away from your mother's grip, "I know it's been hard ever since dad left-"

“Mom! Let go of her!” You cried from the door of her room.

All 3 adults froze and looked at your glassy eyes, mouths wide open.

“Hey, kiddo, I thought you were asleep?” Akira playfully said, your mother let go of Akira and crossed her arms then looked away from you.

“Well, I can't really go to sleep when there’s a bunch of adults yelling about my well-being,” you muttered incoherently. You quickly wiped the uncontrollable tears off your face and sighed.

“Honey,” your mom started, she walked slowly to you, carefully examined your face, and attempted to hug you, but you didn’t accept the offer which made your mother frown. She stopped walking until she was almost face to face with you and placed a hand on your shoulder gently. “Baby, your sister told me that you weren’t happy. Is this true?”

You looked away from her and stared dully at the floor, subtly shifting your feet, then you softly shook your head “no.”

“See Akira, Y/N is happy. So please stop stressing her out.” Your mother said through gritted teeth, then faced you once again. “Y/N honey, how about I go tuck you into bed, hm? I’m so sorry for the excessive noise that was caused.”

“Mom, how clueless can you be? Y/N looks miserable! It’s unhealthy for Y/N to be living-“

Slap.

Your mother just slapped Akira on the face.

“I know what’s best for my daughter! I am her mother! You are not the one who should be telling me how to take care of my own kid!”

“That’s enough, Sakiya.” a familiar voice said from the door.

“Fumeiko-“

“It’s fine. Sakiya, we need to talk.” It was Fumeiko Suna, your mother’s best friend, also known as your next door neighbor. She had been standing in the hallways the whole time, you didn’t even know she was there. Akira was the one who called her over.

That night your mother agreed to get help for her drinking problem. She was gone for 6 months. During those 6 months, the Suna’s took you in since Akira would be in college and you couldn’t have been more grateful.

You and Rintaro were the only kids in the house, being that you both were the same age and the others were in college. It was okay, they were all very polite, dinners were awkward, you could feel some sort of tension between the family but you didn’t pay any attention to it.

When your mom finally came back, it was awkward at first. She still seemed the same, loving and caring, just sober and free of alcohol. It was nice. You two spent the weekends bonding at the mall, watching a movie, or even getting your nails done. Eventually, she gained your trust back, and you couldn’t have been happier.

January 2017.

“Akira, don’t say that. You may not believe me now, but you are such an amazing person, don’t ever think you’ll never find love again. It’s all about having a positive mindset!” you said, thoughtfully stroking her hair as her head laid on your chest.

“I told you that.”

“You did,” you chuckled, “you should take your own advice.

“Oh, shut up!” you both laughed, and Akira let out a shaky sigh. “Thank you, Y/N.”

“Of course, you don't need to thank me. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

— so this is one of the writings that i wrote in January 😭 it’s been in my drafts and i re-read it once and instantly hated it right after. if there’s any typos please tell me!!

— also i wanna apologize again for putting gmds on hiatus,, i feel so bad 😭 i wanna make it up to you guys but idk how so if you have suggestions pls tell me

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tsundere-selfship · 2 years

Note

loved ur piston peak thoughts.............. but i am so broken as well.. Do you have any headcanons for Blade and Nick's relationship? Platonic or not

In fact I do!

Honestly, I'm still unsure whether I'm going to call their relationship completely platonic or otherwise. While they definitely have more than enough potential for a romantic relationship, I also think it's important to normalize platonic closeness, and their important to each other is valid no matter what their relationship was like.

Having said that, no man simply stars in history's fruitiest buddy cop ever right in the middle of the seventies and ISN'T gay. They're both obviously queer, even just looking at their energies alone.

But regardless of whether they were dating or if they were closer to brothers (or somewhere in between), it's made very clear from the movie that Nick was absolutely everything to Blade. After losing him, Blade lost genuinely everything, thought his life was over as well, felt the need to start completely over somewhere new to even be able to keep going.

Remember, they were costars on this show together for upwards of SIX YEARS. The film industry is certainly rough, but I guarantee you they had each other when they were struggling. They likely told each other everything. The closeness we see them have on screen is very much real, if not closer in their personal lives. They definitely kept each other down to earth, it's no wonder it would be so devastating if they were separated.

Being celebrities as they were, even if they were considering themselves dating, they might've had to be more secretive about it, otherwise they'd likely receive way too many personal questions surrounding it. Two actors playing a cop duo in a classic tv series, but lovers in real life? That would attract a lot of attention, both good and bad.

Looking at the movie, we can tell that Blade tried to be more like Nick after he was gone. Blade must've looked up to Nick and admired his more carefree way of handling things. Nick told Blade about all of his problems and thing's bothering him, yet he managed to smile and joke about it anyway. Blade admired that so much, he wanted to be able to do that. He probably closely relied on Nick whenever they were at parties together, because he saw Nick as being much better at handing other people and social situations. Everyone seemed to like Nick so much, they always laughed at his jokes or fell in love with his smile. If Blade quickly got overwhelmed, Nick would be right there to make sure he's okay. That's why Blade avoids social situations in the movie, even now he doesn't think he can do it without him.

On the other side, Nick probably got into a lot of trouble from time to time. He has to be at least a little reckless (obviously), and is a very emotional dude. He expresses how he feels, another thing Blade greatly looks up to. But also, when he's angry or upset, or even just joking around, Nick acts on his emotions first, and thinks later. He probably unintentionally got into a lot of reckless situations that he counted on Nick to help him out of. These situations are including but not limited to: Nick drunk calling their manager, running over some poor guy's fence, waking up in a hotel room he doesn't recognize with a face full of drag makeup, insulting quite a few reputable people to their face, and many many times having gotten lost. Nick probably didn't think he was the smartest or most responsible, but he knew he had his bestie (or boyfriend?) Blade to keep him in check. And he told Blade about his appreciation for him quite often. I can imagine Blade had a special ringtone just for Nick's late night "I am lost and have no money, please help me" call. That isn't to say that Blade hasn't had his fair share of stupid decisions as well.

And above all, you best believe they found themselves in more than enough bizarre situations, both on and off the screen. Quite the inseparable duo indeed! Pls request more of this I'm starting to love it

#planes: fire and rescue #blade ranger #nick lopez #👑 | does he ever stop talking?#asks #anon my beloved #🧯 | when others fly out #I kinda typed this up and posted it without reviewing it #so tell me if it doesn't make sense #I love these two sm

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death-himself · 3 years

Note

Saw your monsyer au on ao3

Great work

Anyway, probably an angsty prompt but I was wondering if you think that any of our monster bois have had nightmares where they go on a hunt and then accidental chomp Virgil. Bonus points if in the moment they actually enjoy his flavor

I feel like the left brain boys (Janus and Logan) would be the most likely to have a nightmare scenario like that, especially Logan since he DID almost munch Virgil, and they'd also be the most likely to pretend everything's fine the next morning even tho they're absolutely miserable and terrified of taking a crunch munch out of their human bf in real life

Great work, don't know if o said that already

Happy holidays Nico

It’s been over a month since you sent this so sorry about that .-. Anyway here’s the fic, some good ol’ hurt/comfort with Loceit and Logicality because Logan deserves it

Warnings: Death (in a dream sequence), cannibalism, nightmares, blood

Logan went down his usual route to hunt. He and his other nonhuman boyfriends often hunted at the same time, spread all across the city and countryside to make their home less easy for the police to find. He found a good place on the rooftop to sit as he watched the humans pass by, waiting patiently for his prey.

One with dark purple hair walked down the alleyway. A pleased smile pulled at Logan’s lips. He dropped down silently in front of them, and before they could even scream he had them pinned to the ground, a hand over their mouth as he sunk his teeth into their arm.

The taste was heavenly. He ripped away at the tender flesh, sweet as candy and melting in his mouth. He ignored the human’s cries as he savored his meal, biting away until rose red pooled around them both. It was the most beautiful shade of blood he had ever seen. Logan felt bile hit his hand as the human attempted to vomit, before all the muscles beneath him loosened, and he heard their heart slow into silence.

Finally Logan pulled away with a sigh, having eaten his fill. He normally refrained from looking at his victims, in fear that he would feel guilty for killing them, but for whatever reason his eyes drifted over, looking over the dead man’s face. Purple hair, blank, empty black eyes, black eyeshadow.

Virgil.

Logan’s eyes snapped open, his body drenched in sweat. He looked to his side, relieved to see Virgil alive and well, sleeping as peacefully as ever. He listened closely to his boyfriend’s steady heartbeat, staring up at the ceiling as he waited for his own heart to come closer to matching.

He hated thinking about how he and Virgil met. He hated what had been going through his mind while he attacked him. He hated the fact that Virgil was the most delicious human he had ever tasted.

It had been something that had always been at the back of his mind, something he refused to acknowledge. Virgil tasted fucking incredible and there was nothing any of them could do about it. If Patton hadn’t been there to stop him, what had happened in his dream would have been reality.

He looked over Virgil at Patton, hugging the end of Janus’s tail like a teddy bear. He was the only one out of the four of them that hadn’t actually tried to kill Virgil, wasn’t he? No, he had saved Virgil from Logan’s own bloodlust. Wow, what a great boyfriend he was.

He sighed, turning over to stare at the clock. It was three AM, that was only three hours earlier than he would usually wake up. Might as well get up then.

Virgil had gone off to work and Roman had decided to visit his brother. The moment both of them left, Janus pulled Logan aside, wrapping his tail around him and almost pulling him close enough to touch noses. “Is something bothering you, love?” Janus spoke softly.

“Of course not.” Even Logan could tell he responded too quickly. Janus smiled.

“Well there has to be a reason why you kept staring at Virgil this morning. I know he’s absolutely gorgeous but there has to be a reason other than that.” Logan sighed. He knew how Janus was; he refused to give up until whoever he was talking to admitted what they were struggling with. It was something he both hated and loved about him.

“...You came close to killing him too, didn’t you?” The question threw off the naga for a moment, yellow and brown eyes widening. Janus hummed, nodding.

“So that’s the issue.” He sighed. “Well yes, I did. If I had held him for maybe five more seconds he would’ve passed out, and if I didn’t notice by then I likely would’ve eaten him alive. It’s in the past though, all is forgiven.”

“What if we realized afterward that he was our soulmate? What if you had looked at your tail and seen that Virgil’s mark was gone after he was dead and eaten?” Janus looked him up and down, concern flooding his eyes.

“Did you have a nightmare like that, darling?” Logan nodded hesitantly. Janus paused, arms hooked around Logan’s neck, his hand drifting up to run his fingers through Logan’s hair.

“I’ve gotten those, too. They’re tough to see, aren’t they?” Logan closed his eyes, allowing himself to go limp in Janus’s arms and coils as the naga pulled him even closer, holding him with all the care in the world.

“We’ve been around him long enough to not harm him. I know with how annoying he can be at times it’s hard to restrain yourself, but it seems like we still manage.” He chuckled. “And our first meetings are in the past now. They were awful first impressions, sure, and we’ll always remember what it was like to nearly kill him, but we know that they won’t happen again.”

Logan hummed, nose nuzzled into Janus’s shoulder. Janus killed through suffocation, though. Logan was the one who actually bit him and tasted his blood. And the taste and scent of that blood was what constantly hung in his mind, something he would always crave but could never get. At least not without consequences.

Janus unwrapped himself a bit, delivering a soft kiss on Logan’s lips and looking him over to make sure he was alright. Logan heard humming from the doorway, smelling Patton waiting just outside. Knowing him he had probably walked in and saw what was going on, opting to wait until they were done rather than joining in.

The vampire peeked his head in to check, before deeming them done and smiling happily. “You two having a cuddle party without me?” He gave Logan a kiss on the cheek before moving over to do the same to Janus.

“We were simply talking about an issue Logan had.” Patton immediately turned back to Logan, eyes full of concern, and Logan wished Janus had just spun one of his lies to get him out of this.

“It was nothing serious, I’m fine.”

“You sure, Logi Bear?” Logan hesitated. Patton was a vampire, he would understand something like this better than Janus or Roman would. But how the hell was he supposed to word it?

“...Virgil tastes incredible.”

“He does!” Patton giggled, a wide smile on his lips. “He let me drink his blood once, it was so good! I was scared I would kill him though, so I didn’t get much of it.”

“It’s very sweet, isn’t it?”

“Like candy!” Patton agreed. Janus looked between the two, accepting in his mind that this was really where the conversation was turning.

“Is there a way that you, ah...” Logan cleared his throat, “a way that you’ve learned to cope with that?” Patton’s brows scrunched in confusion, and he quickly rushed to explain. “Being around him all the time must be rather difficult, as he always...smells like our form of candy, I suppose you could word it.”

“Oh!” Patton’s eyes widened, before his cheeks went red. “Yeah, sometimes I just really wanna bite him. It’s an annoying thing to deal with, huh?” Logan nodded silently. “But like I overheard Jan tell you, we’ve been around him too long to actually hurt him. And I know you especially have a lot of self-control when it matters, so...try not to worry too much about it. You’re probably the least likely out of all of us to hurt him.”

“You were the one that stopped me when we first met him.” Logan spoke quietly. Patton shrugged, floating a few inches above the ground as he thought.

“But you were the one who got to him first. If I was the one that had tackled him, you probably would’ve had to pull me off! You have enough self-control to stop yourself with just a bit of help from us.” Patton took Logan’s hand, running his thumb across his knuckles. “I think that kinda proves that you won’t lose control and hurt him.”

Janus sighed, itching at an old bit of shed snakeskin. “We’ve all worried about what would happen if we lost control. And the truth is that it’s possible, probably more than likely, that we’ll end up hurting him at some point.”

The thought made them all go silent as it weighed down on their psyches. Hurting each other, especially their weaker human boyfriend, was the last thing they wanted to do, and they were all sure they would rather die than harm any of the others.

“But, it hasn’t happened yet, and we’re doing all we can right now to make sure it’s as least likely as possible.” Janus curled his tail around his boyfriends’ legs, snapping them out of the worried, distant blurriness in their eyes. “Let’s not worry too much about a future we can’t see yet, okay?”

They nodded, a weight feeling as though it had been lifted off Logan’s chest, as he for once didn’t plan out the rest of his day, instead opting to join Janus and Patton in what the two had dubbed self-care time, lying on the couch watching cartoons as the future grew blurry and distant.

#sanders sides #dlamp #loceit #logicality #virgil sanders #janus sanders #logan sanders #patton sanders #ghoul!logan #naga!janus #vampire!patton #blood tw #cannibalism tw #nightmares tw #dream death tw #idk if that needs a tw but just in case #sorry roman no appearance for u

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apenapaperandadoofus · 3 years

Text

ALRIGHT SO UH SURPRISE LOL HERES SOME V FLUFF FOR YALL V STANS :D

It’s not Christmas themed bc I uh suck at those lmao, but here’s some nice fluffy one shot that I hope you like :)

I got inspired by this song, so I hope you can listen to it while you read if you want! Just ignore the last like minute when it gets all medieval town-ish lol

Ahh I’m a bit more pleased with this one. I feel like it’s too short tho :( but I still hope I did a better job than last’s time!

V x MC fluff!

You rolled around in your bed, the sunshine peeking through the windows waking you up. You blinked a couple of times and rolled around to your opposite side of the bed, and saw a very sleepy and messy haired V. He looked adorable. His hair was all over the place, and he had this look of calmness while he slept, you were really about to take a picture of him, but now was not the time.

Gently, you shook your boyfriend’s shoulder, who groaned in response.

“Jihyun....wake up. It’s already 9.”

“Just a bit longer....” Jihyun groaned once again and pulled you closer to him, wrapping his arm around your waist and burying his face in your neck, making you giggle.

Throughout the years of your relationship, you had come to learn many things about Jihyun that you found adorable.

For example, one of them was that he absolutely despised plums. One time you had made him some food with plums in it, and he ate it all, but a few months later he confessed that he actually didn't like plums, he was just eating them because it was something you had made.You found that so cute of course, and you teased him about it for a while.

Another thing you found out about your boyfriend was that he wasn't a morning person. Once this boy got something called a sleep schedule, and learned the wonders of having some good sleep for once, he did not enjoy waking up early. He really liked sleeping. Still, today was an important day, and he had to wake up early if you both wanted to make it to the event in time.

You gently shook Vs shoulder again.

“We really have to wake up now Jihyun, you don't wanna be late, do you?” you asked.

V pulled away and opened one eye, looking up at you. “Five more minutes? I want to hold you for longer.”

You smiled shyly and nuzzled your nose to his. “I want to cuddle you for longer too, but you know we have to go and be there for the twins.”

V nodded in agreement, but before you could get up, he pulled you towards him and kissed you, making you melt in his arms. You shared little kisses, until you had to pull away and nag him for trying to get you to stay longer, and he smiled groggily.

And so your day began.

You both went to the kitchen and made breakfast, V making the tea and toast while you cooked the eggs and bacon. Sometimes, while he waited for the toast to be done, he hugged you from behind.

Another fun fact you had learnt about him, was that he was very touched starved whenever he woke up. He would be holding your hand, or hugging you for a while, not letting go until he had fully woken up. He kissed your neck and held you tighter, and then let go when you went to eat breakfast.

After that the two od you had to get ready, you put on your best clothes and did your hair while V finished showering, you having gotten in before him. He had finished buttoning up his shirt, and was now putting on his tie.

Or, well, at least trying to. You let out a little laugh and walked over to him, gently pulling his hands away and tying the tie yourself. V blushed and smiled while looking at you.

“I cant believe you still don't know how to tie ties.” You playfully said, and V chuckled.

“Well I’m glad I don't, or else I would never get enjoy these moments with you.” He kissed your forehead and you shook your head, smiling.

“Cheater. You cant fool me with flattery mister, you will have to learn how to put on ties one way or another. Now come on, we have to head out and wait for Driver Kim to get here.”

V grabbed your hand and led you towards the living room, and once you made it to the couch, the pulled you to sit on his lap, hugging you from behind and kissing the side of your neck.

“whats gotten into you today?”you asked and you felt him shrug.

“I’m just....well I was just thinking of how grateful I am to be here...to be with you...”

You smiled. “was thinking about that too.´”

“I just....to get to wake up everyday with you is...its amazing. It’s amazing that I get to spend everyday with a person as wonderful as you. I honestly never thought Id get to have something like this...I never thought I’d deserve it.”

“Of course you deserve it silly” you said as you turned around to face him, and wrapped your arms around his neck. “you deserve everything in the world Jihyun!”

He blushed and you leaned your forehead against his.

“You’ve done so much for everyone here...I mean, look at the RFA, look at the twins, look at yourself! You have changed so much from who you were before, you've grown Jihyun. Now you're more open, you're taking care of yourself. And look at Saeran and Saeyoung, I mean, you saved their lives! They would have never thought that they'd be able to open their own business, to have normal lives...to get to celebrate something like this! You’ve done so much for them. You’re amazing.”

“I’m so lucky to be with you.” he said. “To hold you like this....it’s thanks to you I've accomplished so much, the amazing one here is you.” he leaned his face closer and stopped just inches away from your lips.

“I love you” he said, and you smiled.

“I love you too, Jihyun.” You leaned in to close the distance and kiss him, but then suddenly a very loud HONK startled you, making V´s eyes widen and a surprised look make its way to his face.

Driver Kim.

You giggled and pecked his cheek, the poor fella still startled, and then you led him to the front door.

“Let’s go, we can do this once we get home.”

And with that, the two of you locked the door and went towards the car, never letting go of each others hands.

#mystic messenger #jihyun mysme #v fluff #v x mc #jumin han #saeyoung choi #mysme #yoosung kim #jaehee kang #saeran choi #choi bois #mysme zen

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estrxlar · 3 years

Text

The Ghost Of You

21 - Unwanted Inconvenience

I've changed the band name from "Xannys" to "Grimlace". I am extremely sorry for making you all suffer through having such an awful band name in the past.

I cannot stress this enough, please vote for my chapters! And I love every comment I get so much!! It makes my day seeing the number of comments I get:)

This chapters songs:

Retreat! - Crumb

Sponge Won't Soak - Wild Moccasins

Dark Red - Steve Lacy

- Y. L. Perspective

"Uhm...Suga?" Tanaka's voice is heard to our left, waking both me Koshi up from our very long nap. "We're here you know."

His awkward tone alone was enough to send us both jumping out of our seats, fearful that the entire team had waited for us to get up. But thankfully, it was just Daichi and Tanaka standing above us.

Both Koshi and I look at each other in unison. "Sorry..." he manages to mumble while leaving the seat. I follow him shortly after, leaving the van empty.

Was I sorry? No. The nap against Koshi was five stars. I hadn't ever had such a comfortable car ride in my entire life until I rested on him. Besides, he was my boyfriend. Why would I be sorry for something silly like that?

What I was sorry about was that we almost got noticed by Eclair. The entire team knew about Koshi and me, except for her. I didn't know much about her and from what I perceived of her she didn't seem like a drama starter. She would most likely cry and yell and forget about it when she went back to France in a couple of days.

We had thought everyone would be tired after such a long car ride. But not Hinata. He admired the structure of the big building, yelling, "Wow! I've never been to a training camp before! This feels so cool!"

"It's just a training camp," Kageyama remarked, yet Hinata stands unfazed.

The team entered the building, all of us observing its basic beige architecture and decor. Everyone gathered around Takeda to ask which rooms they were assigned to. As for Kiyoko, Eclair, and I—we had asked him beforehand to get a head start.

All three of us manage to sneak off from the crowd and hunt down our room number: #613. Although I wasn't very comfortable around Eclair, I didn't feel uneasy to be sleeping in the same room as her. It only meant I couldn't update Kiyoko on my relationship with Sugawara.

Once we'd found our designated room, I unfolded the tiny key and stick it into the lock, hearing a click not soon after I turn it.

When I had opened the door, I wasn't entirely dissatisfied. There were two bunk beds on each side of the room, all four mattresses covered in floral printed sheets with nightstands next to them. The curtains had the same pattern as the sheets, falling over a large square window.

Overall, it was a nice room. Way nicer than the previous motels and hotel rooms that my band had stayed in during concerts and such. All stank of marijuana and alcohol.

Eclair's brackets make a 'jingle!' sound while she squealed, "it's lovely!" The girl runs up to one of the bottom bunks and places her bag there, collapsing onto the mattress. "I'm so thankful to be spending my last few days in Japan here!"

Kiyoko nods gently, her too putting her luggage on the opposite bunk bed. Assuming she wouldn't mind it, I threw my bag on the bunk above her. It would most likely be easier to communicate with her if I shared a bed with her.

"Yes, it's very nice," I say, smiling merely at the blonde girl.

Kiyoko began to unpack her toiletries into the small drawer attached to the bunk bed. I hopped down from the top bed and did the same, observing the carvings that the drawers had. Names, dates, and funny remarks were scratched out in the middle of it, lots of them left from previous sports or art students that came to this building for a camp of some kind. All were either hilarious, inappropriate, or gentle. But in all, they made me smile.

"So you're in a band, Y/n?"

In my eyes widen in fear. Nobody from the team other than Sugawara, Daichi, and Kiyoko knew that I was in a band. So how did the girl find out?

Hesitantly turning my head, I nod, making out an awkward smile across my face. "Uhh, yeah. How'd you know?"

She sits up confidently and chuckles. "I was taking a glance at your Instagram. You seem to go on a lot of trips around the world!"

I wasn't very used to being confronted about my band. And besides that, being acknowledged she was looking through my Instagram was stressful. If she knew about my band, was it possible she knew about Koshi and me?

"Yeah, I travel now and then." Proceeding to unpack my things as if it was no issue to be questioned, I place my pairs of shoes under the bed.

No matter how uncomfortable I attempted to make my tone, she kept on going. "Oh...that sounds like fun! You must have so many fans. Your voice is great too. I wonder why you've never told them team about Grimlace!"

"Hm, I like to keep my life outside of volleyball private..." I say. "Could you please not tell anybody else?"

My question sure was quiet but clear to her. It would determine whether or not Eclair was a bitch or genuinely a nice girl.

Thankfully, she nods lightly, messing with her nails. "Of course not."

Suddenly, the conversation is put to the side by a knock on our door, sending Eclair, hushed Kiyoko, and me to flinch.

Kiyoko puts a hand on her chest, sighing in relief that the tension was interrupted. "Come in," she tells the person on the other side of the door.

Two boys are revealed; Nishinoya and Tanaka walk in, already dressed down in their "sleep clothes", which consisted of a white t-shirt and shorts. Could I talk any mess about their outfits? Nope! I was planning on wearing the same thing.

The buzzcut bow flutters his eyes at the sight of Kiyoko brushing her hair and quickly grows flustered. "L-ladies! Dinner is on the table." He spoke loud in nervousness. "Do you guys like your room?"

"Tanaka, we've been in here less than ten minutes. I'm surprised you're already gotten dressed!" Kiyoko speaks in a sweet tone that seems to mesmerize him. She finished up brushing the ends of her hair and dusts her hands off on her sweat pants, before looking towards the other two girls in the room: Eclair and I.

We nod and drop what we were doing to exit the room with her. If the odds were in my favor, Eclair wouldn't continue interrogating me during dinner. If so, she would soon find out about Koshi and me from one of the men that walked behind us, flustered they'd

Not soon after leaving, we arrive in the mess hall, where the volleyball club was spread around filling their plates and emptying them into their tummies.

The two boys leave our side to continue eating and we help ourselves to some plates. Today they served simple rice, roasted vegetables, and chicken. Nothing special, nothing utterly disgusting. As I'm picking up my food, I look over to the lunch table that the boys were scattered upon, keeping an eye out for any gray-haired men.

There he sat next to Daichi, eating small portions of the rice left in his bowl. 'Does Eclair's being here mean I'm not allowed to sit next to my boyfriend during dinner?' I think internally, finishing filling my plate.

Kiyoko helps herself to sit right next to Daichi, fitting in with the rest of the third years that sat on the bench next to the second years Ennoshita, Kinoshita, and Narita. Across from them were the first years and the terrible two: Tanaka and Noya.

I stood uncomfortably at the end of the wooden table, looking over it to see if there were any empty seats I could eat in. All that looked back at me were eyes of curiosity and confusion.

It only took a few seconds of staring until someone was nice enough to mention my standing there.

"Y/n! Why don't you take my spot? I'm just about done anyway," Daichi tells me while he got up from the bench with the now empty tray. I look at Daichi, then Koshi, then to Eclair who was now walking towards the lunch table.

I of course didn't want her to take my spot, so I nod and bow politely, before switching places with Sawamura. He pays my shoulder gently, whispering, "you're welcome!"

Kiyoko and Koshi both smile at me, scooting over the slightest to make room for me. I say my thanks for my food and began picking at my rice, listening in on the boy's conversation.

"And then I spent my time practicing on the girls' team since I didn't have anyone else to practice with me. It sure felt like I was a part of their club!" Hinata told us, Eclair sitting down next to him, beginning to eat her food as well. "What about you guys? Did you guys have any rough stories before getting into volleyball?"

Tanaka cuts the air with his pointer finger, motioning for us to pause any conversation until he was done chewing. "I used to be a mega introvert before attending Karasuno!"

"Yup, Ryunosuke was just like Kageyama but worse," Nishinoya commented.

I raise a brow at the mention of that. Tanaka—a boy at the edge of having a breakdown?! I couldn't speak for myself. I too was a short-tempered girl towards the beginning of high school.

Kageyama scoffs, rolling his eyes at the mention of his name. "I'm not that bad, you know." We all knew that was a lie. As much as he denied it, Tobio struggled with his anger issues.

Eclair raises her hand slightly, swallowing a lump of rice. "Don't sweat it Kags, everyone has their embarrassing issues. For instance: I used to be such an obsessive girl in my first year. I'm sure I was a nuisance to many of the people in the volleyball club. Always talking in class and being a ditz was my specialty!"

"What about you, Y/n? Have you ever been involved in volleyball, or is this your first time being a part of a volleyball club?" Nishinoya asks me. At first, I thought of shaking my head and replying with a no, as if my memory of middle school had disappeared from my mind.

After thinking about what to reply with for a second or two, I nod my head slightly. "Hm...in junior high I was on the girls' volleyball team, but I was more of a bench warmer. I only joined the team to be closer to my friends, that's all."

"Aren't you friends with the captain of Seijoh

boys volleyball club? You know, since you went to middle school with him?"

I look up to the girl who assumed such ridiculous things, Eclair. There she sat with her chopsticks in hand, lips parting slightly. It was crystal clear that she was trying to dig out my history and force me to tell the volleyball club about my personal life further than what I was comfortable with.

Knowing that I was uneasy, Koshi lays his hand gently onto my knee under the table, squeezing it ever so slightly. My heart beats in its cage, anxious at how many ways this conversation could go if I had said the wrong thing.

"...is that true?" Asahi asks, looking at his fellow teammates to observe their reactions. All of them looked just the same: betrayed.

"Eclair, it's best not to assume things about people you barely know," Koshi tells the girl in a monotone voice, making it obvious that he knew her intentions.

'Well, this got awkward fast.'

"It's okay. Uhm— I'm not friends with any members of Aoba Johsai's volleyball members. Where did you hear that?" I ask, setting down my utensils and clasping my hands together. Surely her reasoning has to be good if it meant ruining my very new relationships with most of the boys at the table.

Most of them sigh after my question, placing hands in their chests. "I thought you were a traitor for a second, Y/n! Eclair, you scared us half to death!" Noya whines.

The girl blinks a few times, shrugging. "I'm terribly sorry! I heard it from a girl that goes to Aoba Johsai, she says that Oikawa never stops talking about Y/n! She only knew by looking up your name and finding out she went to Karasuno."

"Seems you have a crush on Y/n, Eclair. You're almost addicted to looking into her past." Kiyoko suddenly made a remark, smirking as she drank a sip of her water.

The girl grows flustered very quickly, blushing. "No! Sorry, Y/n. I didn't mean to be disrespectful. I'm only interested in what it's like to live without many boundaries. My father never lets me lay a finger on anything that could potentially ruin his vision of what his daughter should be," an innocent look is spread across her face as she says so.

"Aw, I'm sorry to hear that Eclair." Yamaguchi makes a sweet comment, ignorant that she was guilt-tripping. I'd never pictured her to be such a manipulative girl yet calm and poised at once.

She nods, continuing to eat her food.

Though it was her fault entirely, Eclair was saddened that what was supposed to be an enjoying dinner turned out to be silent and awkward. I was growing extremely tired of her passive-aggressive attitude towards me, but losing sight of why I came to this training camp was not an option. I don't care how badly Eclair could hurt my feelings, I won't let it get to me.

Thank you so much for reading this chapter!! I know it's been so late since I've updated. Pls forgive me! I've just now started school again so things are keeping me from writing. Love you all as always,

- estrxlar

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yourcreepyneighborhoodelftwink · 3 years

Text

As the Hero fell upwards through the sands of time, the days rewinding like the gears of a clock, he landed calmly on the cobblestones of Clock Town Square, at the dawn of the first day. He had been through this many times before, and had grown accustomed to reliving the same 3 days, helping the same people with the same schedules, slowly making more and more progress each time. At least he didn't feel an enormous time crunch, even with the threat of the moon hanging above him, he was always able to rewind the days, and could take days to rest, to sleep or ride Epona or play with the inhabitants.

He rarely did, but it was nice that the option was there.

He was pulled from his thoughts by Tatl getting his attention with a soft tinkling sound, looking over at the stand near the Deku flower, and the note pinned to it.

"That's certainly new…" she said cautiously as they approached, Tatl reading aloud to Link.

The pair exchanged a confused and frightened look. It wasn't signed, but they knew exactly who left the note for them.

BEN sat on the edge of the field, their boots hanging over the barrier where the grass turned into sand, looking out at the canyon leading to the beach. It had been so long since they had entered their game, only playing it from the outside. Perhaps they had been showing too much love to Breath of the Wild lately and not enough to the dark masterpiece of their former prison, or perhaps it was the only world they could enter that felt truly real, where the sun was warm and the wind blew. They HAD become a bit spoiled, learning that adding weather effects and random wind blowing did wonders to immersion when they entered a game.

They closed their eyes, speaking up before looking behind them.

"You didn't have to rush over here. "as possible" doesn't mean "instantly", you know…" BEN said gently, lowering their ears with a guilty smile.

Link frowned softly, keeping his distance from the elf. He couldn't draw his sword AND sign, after all, so he would have to make due. "You didn't specify. I've learned better than to provoke you."

BEN couldn't exactly blame his caution. It's why they were here, after all. "My bad. I'll be more specific next time. But I suppose it's neither here nor there now…"

"...is there something you want, BEN? " Link asked, clearly a bit anxious by being asked to meet.

"...a few things. I won't lie and say there isn't a favor I'd like to ask the both of you-"

"Like you have any right to ask Link for anything, at this point!" Tatl quickly interjected, turning red in anger. "You've terrorized us for no good reason, revealed truths we didn't need to know, and then just left us alone one day!"

"-BUT," BEN continued, "that isn't my main reason for being here. First and foremost... You're long overdue for an apology from me."

Link and Tatl looked at each other in confusion. "...pardon? " Link questioned.

"...I've been doing a lot of thinking and self reflecting lately. Especially because I finally have reason to want to improve myself. And I think I've gotten pretty far in trying to right the wrongs of my past, and try to change as a person. But I still never gave the both of you a proper apology, or even an explanation for how I treated you…" BEN sheepishly said.

Link looked down at the seated person, absolutely dumbfounded. All the times he had been attacked by BEN came instantly into his mind, only to not even be able to so much as scratch them in return, even the might of a Goron doing nothing to them. All the times he had been followed and told he was insignificant, worthless, a joke of a hero, told he was nothing more than a bland, boring conduit for the player of a game in a world far grander than his own. Only for BEN to just... Disappear one day. Gone. Vanish into thin air, and only return occasionally, seemingly at their leisure. Something... Didn't add up to him, and he wasn't sure what on Earth made them suddenly stop tormenting him, and now want to make things right.

"...I'll hear you out, at least," Link finally said, stepping forward to sit next to him. If nothing else, were he going to harm Link, BEN would have done it by now.

"Not that it makes us all hunky-dory yet," Tatl offered, settling on Link's shoulder.

BEN smiled softly, letting out a relieved breath. They stayed quiet for a moment, deciding their words carefully. "I'm not... Sure where to start. So much has happened to me. I guess I should start when we first met. When I first entered this game. It was my favorite game, and with me when I died," they started.

Tatl interrupted, jingling softly. "...when you died?"

BEN nodded softly. "When I died. I was just about your age, Link, about 12. More specifically, when I was murdered. Father simply... Got tired of me, I suppose. He tricked my religion's leader- we refer to him as The Father- into thinking it was my time to Ascend when it wasn't. The whole explanation of my belief system isn't important in this, just that I was robbed of something very important and sacred to me because of it."

"That sounds horrible," Link signed.

"It was... And I was only 12, and not the greatest at understanding or expressing my emotions... I was so angry, absolutely furious at losing that chance, as what had been done to me. I've always had a strong sense of justice, if you can believe it. I don't easily stand for people wronging me. But when I died, my spirit was trapped in this game. All that rage bottled up, with nowhere to release it... Until I started releasing it on you. Very unfairly."

"I'll say," Tatl said, though there wasn't much bite behind her words.

"Eventually, someone played the game, and I was able to break free, find someone else to torment. And after that, start lashing out at everyone who had hurt me, making them

PĄŸ,"

BEN continued, their voice glitching out just a bit at the final word.

"...i moved on to more innocent people after that. I was out of control. To the point where my goddess, Luna, intervened. She stopped me herself, gave me a new body, made me into a young adult so I wouldn't be trapped as a child forever, and I carry the souls of everyone I hurt in my blind sadism, until I join her again one day. And I've worked hard to be a better person now. I've found so much to make my life wonderful, and to make the most of my second chance…" BEN trailed off.

"...but you still want to make amends to everyone you've hurt," Link finished for them.

"...I don't expect you to forgive me. I don't think I can be forgiven. But I really AM sorry for how I treated you. Both of you. Of everyone I've lashed out at, you're the least deserving of it. No matter WHAT'S happened to me, it's NO excuse for how much I've hurt you. And even if you never forgive me, I would love the opportunity to make it up to you…" they finished softly.

"...would you excuse us for a moment?" Tatl asked, flying a slight distance away. Link glanced over at BEN before rising to his feet to follow, and speak with the fairy alone. BEN politely stayed looking forward, allowing them the privacy.

"...do you believe them?" Tatl asked.

"...yeah. They seem genuine," Link admitted.

Tatl nodded softly. "I do, too. There's much simpler ways to trick us or convince us if that was their intention. Even if they said they wanted a favor, this is a lot of lengths to go to for just that…"

"I wonder what they want," the hero mused, glancing over at BEN.

"...maybe ask? Perhaps you can also ask a favor of him, test his sincerity," she said.

"What would that be? " he asked.

"Well, you've said you're curious about his world, whatever it is that our entire world is only a game in, a small part of. Maybe you can ask to explore his world. It'd give you the opportunity to spend more time with him and let him earn your trust, anyway," she offered.

Link nodded softly, then whistled to get BEN's attention. "Alright, BEN, we've talked it over. First, I want to know what favor it is you want…"

"Actually, it's a favor specifically from Tatl," they explained.

"Wait, me?" she questioned.

"...my daughter has watched me play this game a lot. And she's absolutely fallen in LOVE with you, she ADORES seeing you on screen. Her first birthday is in a few months, and there's... Circumstances about my life, and now hers, that will make her very different from other children, with so many secrets to keep. She could really use having a companion by her side, a friend to offer wisdom and company and help when she needs it. A copy of you, like how I copied Epona, to watch over her and make her feel less alone…" BEN said.

"...you have a daughter?" Link asked.

"And a boyfriend. Soon to be husband," BEN explained, holding up their hand to show off their ring.

Tatl let out a soft chime at this. "Well... I'm certainly flattered you think I'd make a good companion to her…"

BEN smiled softly. "I don't expect an answer today, don't worry. There's still a few months before her birthday. And I understand if it's not something you're comfortable with…"

"...we have a proposal for you, in that case," Link began. "You want to make amends to us. We're admittedly curious about this world outside of our own. So, let us explore. Show us your life, and what lies outside this "game", and earn our trust. Then we'll consider it."

BEN thought this over. They'd have to be careful, but this wasn't impossible… "...I can't completely remove you from the game. I'd have to copy you, then merge the copy and your true self after. It's basically the same thing, though, you'd keep the memories and everything. And you'd have to do EXACTLY as I say, I... REALLY can't have attention drawn to myself or the people I live with. If there's something that catches your attention, you can't gawk, just stay calm and ask me. And there's going to be a LOT, the real world is nothing like this one. Hylian sign doesn't match up with any sign language in my world, so you'll at least be able to speak freely. But if you can do that, and trust that I'm keeping us both safe when I tell you to do something... I'll happily show you around."

Link considers this, then nods. He holds out his hand to BEN, who shakes it.

"Then we have a deal."

#the hero of thunderthighs #creepypasta #ben drowned #fic #fanfic #(y'all deserve to know the Google Docs title for this is 'uh-oh BENny-wenny done a fucky-wucky')

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roseyserpents · 5 years

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Back To You

Pairing: Scott Reed x reader

Warnings: swearing, mentions of sex, fighting, alcohol

Characters: Scott Reed, Sheri Holland, Montgomery De La Cruz, Bryce Walker, Zach Dempsey

Word count: 1,757

Summary: You and Scott take a break but you find yourself wanting him back

A/N: this is based off the song Back To You by Selena Gomez! This is also the first 13rw fic and fic on this account I'm posting!

Took you like a shot

Thought I could chase you with a cold evening

Let a couple years water down how I feel about you

It was bad. Sure, throughout your year and a half relationship you'd had fights with Scott, but none had been this bad or ended this messy. He'd gotten mad at you for tutoring Bryce and Zach when they'd asked for your help because you were in AP classes, and you'd countered with your anger about him being gone to much and ditching you in the recent month. They were small problems but that was all that took for the stress that'd been building up to boil over. This put to much strain on your relationship so you decided to take a break. The week following the breakup and still more after you'd spent at parties getting drunk to keep your mind off of your feelings even though you knew it wasn't good for you. You were mad. You were so mad at Scott for everything he'd done to you and for making you cry over him.

And every time we talk

Every single word builds up to this moment

And I gotta convince myself I don't want it

Even though I do

"Y/n!" An all to familiar voice calls out from the other end of the hall. You quickly close your locker ignoring the fact you'd left your folder for your next class and try to get away from the situation you'd been avoiding. But, against your attempt to run, someones hand lands on your upper arm, gently turning you to face them as you let out a heavy sigh. Scott stands in front of you, your heart dropping to your feet as you catch his eyes for the first time in more than a month.

"Hey," He breathes with a faint small as if he'd forgotten what he was going to say. "I was wondering if you'd want to go to Monet's to, um, catch up sometime?"

You wanted to say yes. Your heart yearned for his touch again, to spend time with him and see the very smile he had plastered on his face now everyday. But your brain was telling you that he'd hurt you, so what's to stop him from doing it again if you went back to him?

"No." Your brain answers despite your heart trying to yell over it. Before you can think you walk away with a small strut in your step towards you next class leaving a hurt Scott behind as other students move around him like water around a stone.

We never got it right

Playing and replaying old conversations

Overthinking every word and I hate it

'Cause it's not me

You and Scott lie on the hood of his car next to the lake, watching the waves gently lapping up onto shore with milkshakes in your hands.

"Do you love me?" You ask suddenly, turning to look at the blonde. He suddenly coughs, choking on the milkshake in his mouth as he sits up and spits it into the grass. You sit up, supporting your weight with your hand as he turns back to you.

"What?" He asks after recovering, meeting your amused gaze.

"Do you love me?" You repeat, more nervousness in your words than the first time.

A smile spreads on Scott's face as he leans closer to you. "I," He says, pecking the end of your nose. "Love," He places a kiss to your cheek. "You." Finally his lips land on yours before he pulls away, still leaning over you with the goofy grin you'd grown to love-

"It's not my fault I wanted to be around someone after you keep skipping out on our dates!" You yell at Scott, a finger jabbing at his chest.

"You could've gone to Sheri or Chloe!" Scott counters, looming over you using his height as an advantage. "You didn't need to go to my friends!"

"Well your friends are a lot better at being around than you are!" Your face was turning red and your throat going scratchy from yelling so much. You were surprised nobody had come over asking if someone was being murdered.

"I'm your boyfriend! Not Bryce and Zach!"

"They'd probably make a better boyfriend than you are!" The second the words left your mouth you couldn't believe them, and apparently neither could Scott because his face falls and it's silent for a moment, both of you trying to process your next actions.

"Fine. If you'd rather be with one of them than me, go ahead." He says in a normal volume but hurt, anger, and venom laced deep in each syllable. "We need to take a break." He grabs his jacket off of your couch and walks towards your door, emotions radiating off of him as you follow him out of your house.

"Good!" You yell from your doorway as he walks towards his car. "I don't need you or your fucking relationship!" With that you slam the door shut before turning and sliding down it. The emotions spill over inside of you as tears streak your face and you curl up against the door, crying into your knees for the rest of the night.

"Y/n?" Sheri asks, pulling you out of your own head.

"Huh?" You reply, pulling your hand away from your face to face her.

"I said, are you okay? You look... Out of it." She asks, concern plastered on her face.

No. "Yeah I'm good, just didn't get a lot of sleep." You lie.

And what's the point in hiding?

Everybody knows we got unfinished business

And I'll regret it if I didn't say

This isn't what it could be

"Sure." She says, sitting down next to you. "Tell me what's up. Is this about Scott?"

You sigh, giving a nod before resting your chin on your desk.

"Practically the whole school knows about your break." She continues, putting air quotes around the word "break". You wanted to tell her how much you missed him, how much you wanted him back or to atleast heal things, but you don't.

"I'm just mad at him. I can't handle seeing him." You lie again. You don't know why you weren't confiding in Sheri for once. You knew this situation could be different, but part of your heart and part of your brain wouldn't let you so easily go back to Scott.

She gives you a look as if she could see right through your lie but walks away to her seat across the room leaving you back to your thoughts. How could you say that to him? How could you tell the person you loved and needed the most that you didn't need them? You hated that he had this effect on you now, turning you into a person you didn't know. He'd said it, you needed a break. He agreed it wasn't working.

You needed to find something to get him off your mind - or someone.

I wanna hold you when I'm not supposed to

When I'm lying close to someone else

You're stuck in my head and I can't get you out of it

You'd gone to one of Bryce's parties the following night, gotten drunk out of your mind, and woken up around four A.M. in a bed with Montgomery De La Cruz passed out next to you.

A groan falls from your lips as you stand up, wrapping the sheet from the bed around yourself as you slowly wipe a hand across your face. You pull his hand off of your waist before sitting up, Montgomery stirring by you but not waking up.

You found yourself wanting it to be Scott lying next to you and not someone you hardly knew. You wanted to wake up in his arms again instead of with a hangover from trying to forget him. But, no matter what you did he was stuck in your head. He kept coming up again and again no matter how much you didn't want him too.

If I could do it all again

I know I'd go back to you

You'd made a decision that Sunday night. You knew you could turn everything around, you just needed the confidence to do so. It'd taken a lot of time for you to bring yourself to your decision, but you couldn't push down the need to go back to Scott anymore.

"Hey, Scott!" You yell out as soon as you set foot into school, finding him at his locker before he could run away.

He closes his locker before tightening his jaw and turning to you. "What." He says, more of a statement than a question.

What was there wasn't sure

But I'd go back to you

I know I'd go back to you

"I'm sorry. For everything." You sigh, looking to your feet. "We ended things badly. The last month before the fight was bad and nothing seemed sure about it. But, I miss you. I know I pushed you away before but I shouldn't have."

Scotts expression softens slightly as he looks at you with questioning eyes.

You can break my heart in two

But when it heals, it beats for you

I know it's forward, but it's true

"And I'm not gonna lie, what you said hurt me, it broke my heart. But when I got over it I found myself wanting to be around you again. I know that sounds stupid and bold or whatever, but it's the truth." You continue. "It's fine if you just wanna be friends or acquaintances, but I need you in my life again it's been so horr-"

"Y/n." Scott cuts you off. You look up and his scowl from before has been replaced by his smile that lights up the entire room. "I would love to get back together with you." As he talks he'd slowly stepped closer to you, his hands going to your waist. You grin as you snake your arms around his neck pulling you both closer to each other.

"I'm sorry for being such an idiot." You sigh, your hands laced in the hair at the nape of his neck.

"You might be an idiot, but you're my idiot." Scott says before leaning down, connecting his lips with yours. Electricity sparks as warmth spreads through you, all the negative thoughts from the last two months disappear and are replaced with one one simple thought:

You were back with Scott and that was all that mattered.

#scott reed x reader #scott reed #13 reasons why season two #13 reasons why moodboard #13 reasons imagine #13 rw #13 reasons why #13 reasons why fanfiction #13rw fanfic #bryce walker #zach dempsey #sheri holland #monty de la cruz #go back to you by selena gomez

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peakyhxrry · 4 years

Text

Swing and a kiss

It was a hot Friday night in the middle of August and the two young peaky boys could be seen walking through the streets of Birmingham in what would be classed as their Sunday bests the two of them occasionally cracking a joke or pushing each other trying to get the other to fall over sometimes they would succeed and one of the boys would burst out laughing causing fellow passers-by to shoot them disgusted looks till they'd notice that one of the boys was from the most respected family in Birmingham and they'd quickly scurry off not wanting to be on the opposing side of a Shelby with a loaded gun, the two boys, however, didn't care nor notice the looks from the passers-by as they were too observed in their own world where it was just the two of them acting like normal teenagers for night. It was extremely rare that Thomas would give Finn and Isaiah the night off as of recent, it had become harder for the Shelby's since Johns passing there was a space that needed to be filled and the head of the family wanted his youngest brother to fill that space as quickly as possible in an attempt to restore order in the family, especially after he had found out about the boys real relationship with his best friend. Thomas feared that if it got out that not only was his brother in bed with another man but that man was one of such stature as Isaiah Jesus the family name would be tainted. The man, of course, didn't disagree with his brothers relationship he'd support it fully so long as his brother was happy and understood the risks of the boys being together which both boys understood so here they were on the streets of Birmingham looking like two young troublemakers to everyone outside the family but if you weren't afraid enough to look at them you'd notice the little things that no one else did like Finns hand brushing against Isaiah's as they walked slightly closer than any friends would itching to hold each other's hands or the small glances they'd give each other when they thought that no one was looking. Tonight however they'd heard of a new club that they could be themselves at so they were going to check it out, maybe make it a regular hangout spot of theirs if they felt safe and comfortable there. Of course, it wouldn't matter if they were welcome there or not anyways no one dared to test a Shelby to their face, especially when said Shelby had already had a few drinks before leaving his house.

A few laughs and shoves later the two boys were now walking into the club the environment completely contrasted the one on the streets of Small Heath. The inside of the club was bright and comforting with jazz musicians playing lively and upbeat tunes gaining lots of couples to let loose and dance along to the beat. Looking around Finn and Isaiah smirked at each other seeing how carefree everyone was upon seeing two men in the corner hooking up Isaiah took Finn's hand into his own and kissed it leading him to the bar to order their signature drink a bottle of Irish whiskey "We can be us here Finn, the night is ours" Isaiah had excitedly shouted to his boyfriend once they had their bottle sitting at a table not far from the dance floor which caused a genuine smile to appear on Finn's face. Those were rare these days so Isaiah took it in his stride and leaned back in his chair feeling accomplished slightly. Finn hadn't smiled properly since the passing of his older and closest brother John, he wasn't there when he died but from the way it was described to them he could imagine what it looked like which caused him to have nightmares about that day every time he closed his eyes. The bags under his eyes proved that he didn't sleep much as well as how sunken and hollow his eyes looked, most days his eyes were dark and didn't hold the light that Isaiah had first fallen in love with over the years but as he stared at the boy next to him right now he noticed said light slowly reigniting as he stared around at all the people in the club. Isaiah was right they could be themselves here and not have to worry about the boys brothers, who still hadn't fully come to grips with the fact that the boys are together. "Then what are we waiting for Isaiah? Lets dance love" Finn had exclaimed pulling his boyfriend up to his feet and excitedly dragging him over to the dance floor where the smaller boy began to try and copy everyone else's dance moves looking slightly lost as his arms did not coordinate with his legs but stood watching the skinnier boy Isaiah couldn't help but feel even more hopelessly in love with the boy. The new care free attitude he had found compelled the boy to be even closer to him as the song changed from the upbeat jazz one that was playing to one with a much slower tempo caused Isaiah to embrace Finn as the two stood swaying to the beat Isaiah's hazel eyes meeting Finns teal blue ones making it seem like it was just the two of them in the room. Finn could swear that time stops whenever he stares into isaiah's oculus uterque and it was a moment he would love to be trapped in forever. As the song came closer and closer to finishing the two boys slowly stepped closer to each other and before long Finns lips had found themselves melting perfectly onto Isaiah's as said boy loosely draped his appendages around Finn's neck deepening the kiss as they still swayed to the music until it ended which caused them to pull away as the music picked its pace up again. Deciding he didn't want to embarrass himself anymore Finn walked back to their table and sat down in his chair from before sipping on his whiskey as isaiah followed him over and copied the boys actions.

The boys had been at the same club for a few hours now and had drank more bottles of whiskey than they could count and danced to that many different types of songs that their feet were starting to ache. They stumbled out of the club at 1 o'clock in the morning trying to quietly make their way back down watery lane towards the boys family home where they would be staying but this task seemed almost impossible with a drunk jesus boy and an inebriated shelby boy who kept shouting comments to his boyfriend when he thought he was whispering "You're really good lookin you know. Are you coming home with me?" he continuously shouted to which Isaiah would simply chuckle and answer him the same thing each time "you're really good looking as well sweetheart and yes i'm coming home with you" and each time a goofy smile would creep its way onto Finn's face and he'd shout something along the lines of 'being with the best looking person in Birmingham' by the time they had gotten to Finns house the two of them had woken up half of Birmingham which unfortunately for the two young peaky boys that they had also woken Finns Aunt Polly up which was never a good thing to do. Not knowing that they were being so loud the two boys attempted to sneak into the house Isaiah giggling like a schoolgirl as Finn fell over the step into the threshold as he took his shoes off "shhhhhhhhh" Finn slurred holding his finger up to his face which only caused Isaiah to copy exactly what he had done both of the boys turning into giggling messes as they walked into the kitchen. Thinking they were alone Isaiah pushed finn against the wall and pinned him there the much taller boy staring down at him before going to kiss him only to be interrupted by a forced cough which caused him to jump and turn around as Finn peered over his shoulder before hugging him from behind when he saw his aunt sat at the kitchen table cigarette in hand as she glared at the two of them. On instinct Isaiah pulled finn in front of him and wrapped his muscular arms around the boy's small frame resting his head on top of Finns as they stared at polly. The older woman who had been mad at both of the boys moments before took a draw from her cigarette exhaling the smoke, not taking her eyes off the two boys before a faint smile tugged at her tight lips as she saw how the two boys were acting. "Come on off to bed you two, Tommy will want you up early in the morning" and with that they made their way up stairs the best they could before they collapsed on Finns bed. Isaiah first and Finn curled up into his side their clothes from that night still on and a drunken headache awaiting them the next morning. Their snores soon filled the small house of watery lane as Aunt Polly walked up the stairs and peered into their room before turning to look at Tommy who was stood in his own doorway and simply nodded at him before walking to her room. It was a simple nod which to anyone else would have looked like a greeting but to the man it was her seal of approval of his youngest brother and his boyfriend which caused the Tommy Shelby to smile and go off to bed.

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lifeisdabubbles-undersalmondean · 3 years

Text

La Pomme ~ Chapter 13

Pairing: Sam x OC (eventual Dean x OC and Dean x Castiel. And I mean eventual.)

Series summary: George is a casual French-Mistake-universe Supernatural fan living in no-COVID 2020, who's life is upended when she's suddenly launched between realities, two years into the boys' past (S13E22). What begins as an insane, immersive fan experience turns into more when Jack goes missing and George offers up her AU information to help track him down. Soon it's discovered that she and Sam may actually have history. But that's impossible, right?

Word Count: 3,800

Warnings: {smut, fluff, angst, show level violence, swearing, mentions of suicide} ***Detailed warnings will be tagged for specific chapters.

A/N: Following the events of my prequel Paradise and second story From My Eyes Off. Reading those first gives context but isn’t necessary to start this one.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Early the next morning, they'd all gotten outta bed a little sluggish but showered and dressed quickly. George was moving extra slow because what little sleep she did get had been plagued by nightmares. Typically she could remember even the smallest details of her incredibly vivid dreams for hours after she awoke, but this time the only thing she could focus on was a lingering sense of panic, like she was being hunted by something dangerous.

The exhaustion ended up being a blessing, though, because Sam and George were both too tired to be awkward around each other while they got ready. As he showered, George dressed in her new clothes; the dark bootcut jeans, maroon v-neck long sleeved tee, and Friends hoodie. She gave a little knock on the bathroom door to let Sam know that the coast was clear, before sitting down to slip on her new black tennis shoes.

He emerged a few moments later dressed in a dark blue and white flannel and dark blue jeans, his wet hair slicked back and out of his face. That damn sexy beard was still there, too; still wet from the shower.

Oh my. Her eyes went wide, feeling the temperature in the room skyrocket. Sam must have caught her reaction because he looked down at himself curiously.

"What?" He wondered.

"Er--nothing! Sorry." She mumbled, quickly turning away to hide her smirk.

That's all the caffeine my libido needed.

While she fanned herself discreetly, she gathered up her things. Once she was sure she had everything--including the teddy--Sam threw on his chocolate brown jacket and they left the room, meeting up with Dean and Cas at the car. Everyone was ready to hit the road by sunrise.

They stopped at the Carrier Bistro, another Carson City gem, for a quick breakfast because Sam and George were starving. Matching their car seating arrangements, Dean and Sam sat on one side of the booth, Cas and George sat across from them. Castiel got water, George got iced tea, a waffle, and a side of eggs, Sam got an egg white omelet, and Dean, who'd already eaten nearly half the pie George bought for him, ordered some toast and a side of bacon (because a little grease is the perfect thing to top off a ton of sugar in the morning). Both brothers also ordered 'the world's largest coffee or the next best thing.'

When the waiter left, George filled them in on her adventures the night before.

"Once I left you guys, I tried taking the cab to my mom's house but no one was there. The house didn't even look the same, but I know it was the right address. Same thing for my dad's house, the house I grew up in across town, and the condo my brother recently bought. They all looked different and no one I recognized was there. So, I decided to try researching my family to see if I could track down where they were and that's when I found that." She gestured at the article she'd found about the house fire that was set on the table between them.

"That's why you went to the college?" Dean confirmed.

George seemed surprised, "Yea… how did yo-"

"It's what we do," He responded coolly, taking a sip of his coffee when the waiter dropped their drinks off.

"We tracked you down through the cab company," Sam reminded her. After a beat she remembered him mentioning it the night before, nodding affirmatively.

"Ran into Stacey," Dean interjected with a smirk, George's eyes went a little wide in surprise. "She was helpful, pointed us in the direction of the diner. But-uh, she asked us to pass on a message." He took a sip of his coffee, shooting eyes at Sam.

A faint blush creeped onto her cheeks and she chuckled nervously, avoiding Sam's gaze, "Oh?"

Sam cleared his throat nervously, "Uh, yea, she just wanted us to tell you to, uh, lose her number?" He tried to seem nonchalant and uninterested. Dean was grinning from ear to ear, staring with open curiosity at her.

Her expression was a cross between indignation and guilt as she asked, "What?! Why? What did you say to her?"

Sam looked pointedly at Dean, who was now trying to look innocent and answered, "Nothing! We said we were trying to find a missing person whose boyfriend wa-"

"You told her I have a boyfriend?! Ugh, Dean!" George laughed and rolled her eyes. The three of them were looking at her expectantly, so she explained, "Without a student ID they weren't going to let me in, so… I had to find another way," She batted her eyelashes exaggeratedly at them.

"So, what, you blinked at her?" Dean chuckled at his own joke as she reached across the table to slap his arm.

"No, I used the only resources I had at my disposal," She clarified pointedly. When they still seemed confused, she sat up straight and pushed her chest out with a clearing of her throat.

"Oohhh, I see! Your resources. Got it," Dean gave her an exaggerated wink and took another drink of his coffee.

"Yea! And now you've told her I have a boyfriend and she thinks I'm an asshole!"

"I got the impression she just thought you were confused," Dean offered helpfully.

"Oh my god! Damn it, Dean!" George laughed in annoyance.

"Why does it matter?" He laughed indignantly right back. "Were you planning on pursuing that? I think I saw a payphone back in Reno if you'd like us to drop you off on our way to Jack."

George 'grr'ed at him and shook her head, "That's not the point! I am not confused about my sexuality and I don't cheat on my partners, which--thanks to you--is now what Stacey thinks! Not exactly the kind of thing I want becoming canon."

"Relax, flirting isn't cheating," Dean waved her off flippantly.

George's nostrils flared and she smiled condescendingly, "Well, thanks for warning me about your standards, but I'm not talking about the flirting." Sam snorted loudly and tried not to laugh, clearing his throat exaggeratedly when Dean gave him a dirty look. Having paused to hold back her own laughter, she explained, "I… sort of flashed her in order to get login credentials to use the computer."

Sam and Dean jumped in surprise as the waiter walked up at that moment, dropped their food, and refilled the coffee swiftly. George, sweet smile plastered on her face, buttered and syruped her waffle in silence. Castiel seemed to be calculating the ramifications of that statement, Sam was blushing, and Dean was stunned to silence. Cutting a piece, she nodded affirmatively and then took a bite, chewing with a big, closed mouthed grin as they all processed.

"Ohhhhh! You used your resources," Dean finally said slowly and with great emphasis. Then he nodded slowly in appreciation, "Not bad," he stamped his approval before shoveling a bacon into his mouth. George blushed a bit but smiled again with a small eye roll, before tipping an imaginary hat at him. She glanced at Sam briefly to gauge his reaction, before taking another bite. His expression was indiscernible, but he looked more curious than disgusted, so that was promising.

Castiel waited for them to eat a few bites in awkward, contemplative silence before asking curiously, "You 'flashed her' what? Do you have a fake badge of some kind?"

Sam choked on his omelet and Dean snorted into his coffee. Laughing nervously, George glanced between them, suddenly seeming slightly embarrassed about the situation for the first time. Having done it was one thing, having to describe it was another.

Looking back at Castiel she answered, "Flashing is uh,... it's when you… you just kind of, you just, you lift your shirt up for a minute. Or whatever."

Castiel didn't understand, "You lift your shirt 'up?' Up where? Why is that a form of currency suitable for trade?"

It had been her literal job for the past 10 years to educate and communicate on sex, but being questioned by an angel was like going to confession on steroids. Even though his tone was purely curious, she felt inexplicably judged. And she was agnostic!

She thought about it for a moment, noting the total lack of assist from the still recovering brothers across the table and finally just stated matter of factly, "Oh fuck it, I lifted my shirt over my chest and showed her what was underneath." When he still looked confused, she clarified further, "My breasts, Castiel. I showed her my breasts. That's what flashing is. And in exchange for letting her look at my breasts, she logged me into a computer. There."

Dean took another bite of bacon to stifle his laughter after asking, "Curious, if you wanted that 'becoming canon?'" George flipped him the bird before stealing one bacon as retribution.

Castiel seemed to understand the explanation but asked, "How did you know she was interested in seeing your breasts?"

George snorted, patting his arm patronizingly, and ever-so-humbly saying, "Uh, let's just say I had a hunch," then glanced again at the brothers who both shook their heads in amusement.

Sam cleared his throat and finally found his voice again, "I think what Cas means is, ho-how did you know she was… interested in-in your chest-" Sam stuttered, glancing at Dean who snickered, "Er, I mean, not like that! I meant-"

"You meant, how did I know she was gay?" George clarified kindly, to which Sam nodded in thanks. She shrugged, "Well, I didn't for sure, but queer people can usually sense our friends." She gave Dean a discreet smirk and once over before continuing, "Based on that, and some of her more apparent interests, I took a shot. Not the worst experience, all things considered; certainly lucked out that she was cute and friendly."

No one was quite sure how to respond until Dean commented with a mouth full of toast, "I guess she was cute, if you like girls with heavy theatre makeup."

George furrowed her brow, "What? She wasn't wearing that much makeup."

"I guess that's subjective; all that pink blush everywhere was too much for my taste," He shook his head with a shrug.

George and Sam shared an annoyed eye roll and he corrected quickly, "Dean, that wasn't makeup. She had vitiligo."

"Viti-what-o?"

George swatted at him again, "Vitiligo, loser! It's a condition where you lose skin color in patches because the pigmentation cells die."

"Oh," Dean said, intrigued. He thought about it for a minute and then said, "Then you're right, she was cute. Do you still have that number?"

"Oh wow," George blurted, rubbing a hand over her face and chuckling. "Sorry guy, she was definitely a lesbian."

"Anyway!" Sam interjected to save them all from his perverted brother.

Still chucking, George picked the conversation back up on his cue, "Anyway, after the flashing she logged me into a computer and I was able to find out all about my nonexistence," She made an exaggerated sneer, as though the idea offended her. "So, mom's parents: dead in a house fire supposedly due to faulty wiring. Over on my dad's side, I had to go all the way back three generations where I discovered that my great grandfather succumbed to illness on the battlefield during WWI before he'd had any children. Other than my Aunt Lorna, who by all accounts is alive somewhere, the entire family I grew up with doesn't exist." She paused and took a sip of her drink, trying to swallow down her emotions.

"I'm sorry, George," Sam reached over and placed his hand over hers consolingly, the other two giving her sympathetic looks. She smiled softly at the touch, turning her hand over in his and squeezing in gratitude. When she noticed the raised brow on Dean's face, she cleared her throat and pulled her hand away to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear.

"I was just kind of in shock when I found everything." She paused to take a thoughtful bite of her scrambled eggs before continuing, "Not shock actually… more like, happy surprise? I was kinda relieved, if I'm honest." Sam and she shared another knowing glance before she continued, "Like, I can focus on helping you guys now because I know nothing is holding me back. I have no family to worry about. I'm completely, totally… utterly, and… 100 percent alone here," As she said it the internal struggle between relief and spiraling panic boiled up again.

Sam frowned, but Castiel was the one who offered comfort, "You're not alone, George."

"Thanks, Castiel," She sighed in frustration and put her fork down, suddenly losing her appetite. "What I mean is, I just felt this strange sense of acceptance and…" she struggled to find the right words to describe an indescribable feeling. "Purpose? It was like 'OK, my family isn't here, I don't have anyone who might be worrying about me, so now I can focus on what I'm supposed to do'. I mean I've always felt different; I never fit in much. I was always the weird kid and didn't have many friends, and holy shit my family. Ya know, I love 'em but--and this sounds bad, so excuse the obvious lack of humility here--I just always felt like the sane patient in the asylum, ya know? It--Ya know what, not the time to get into it," She had sounded like she was headed off on a tangent but pulled herself back.

"When I found all this information last night, I--I…I don't really know how to explain it," She and Sam shared a quick knowing glance before she continued, "but while I should have felt devastated, I mostly felt relief. Like I finally could breathe in all the way because I'm where I'm supposed to be? It was also confirmation that the only people I knew in this universe were the people I was already with, and already helping! Bonus," She finished with a hesitant, confused chuckle. She knew how crazy she sounded. The look Dean was giving her seemed to indicate he felt the same. "Don't ask me to explain it because I have no idea," giving a defeated shrug, she continued, "anyway, I knew you guys were going to find me soon, so I printed the article and left--not before Stacey gave me her number--and headed over to Brown Cub for your food," Dean tipped his imaginary hat to her. "Then I got the room, stripped off those crusty ass clothes, and took the best shower of my life. Then you showed up."

"What do you mean you *knew* we'd find you soon?" Castiel questioned.

"What?" She'd stolen another piece of Dean's bacon and had to dodge his swatting. "What do you mean?"

"How did you know we would find you?"

"Oh, I didn't know-know, I just...figured? I mean, like Dean said, it's what you do--the Winchesters and Castiel, ya know? You've got a certain set of skills," She cracked, winking at Sam and then shrugged, "I knew it wouldn't be long before you'd be able to track me down."

Castiel pressed, "How could we track you down? We don't even know your last name and you don't have a cell phone. How did you know we were coming?" George gave Sam and Dean a raised eyebrow, not understanding why Cas was semi-interrogating her.

Dean felt his phone vibrating in his pocket and pulled it out to see Garth calling. He excused himself from the table to answer it.

"I...I mean, I didn't know you were coming. I just-"

"Tell me more about your instincts feeling heightened? And your sense of purpose? Do you know what this 'purpose' might be?" He questioned her.

Thinking he was just being a concerned friend, George shook her head helplessly, "No, not really. Honestly, I--"

He cut her off to ask matter-of-factly, "Do you have any Enochian protection symbols on your person?"

She was confused by the question, "What, like a tattoo? No, I told you I wasn't that big of a fan--"

"Could be a tattoo, could be something burned into your skeletal structure, maybe?"

"Not that I'm aware of?" George smirked in confusion, glancing at Sam for any explanation. His feeble shrug in response offered no clarity.

"Because, when I try to read you, you're fuzzy--"

"Sorry--I'm fuzzy when you try and read me?" George looked indignant.

"Hey, we got problems." Dean had returned from his phone call and seemed agitated. "That was Garth. He joined Carol and Suzie on the recon like we asked and they saw the demon pack grab a 12 year old boy for lunch. They stormed in and nearly got themselves killed saving him."

"Jesus," George commented with a frown.

"Are they--" Sam began with concern.

Anticipating his question, Dean cut him off, "They're safe for right now but they're hurt and pretty sure the pack tailed them. They need help. I tried mom and Bobby but they're tracking something near Fresno, closer to us than them and..." Dean paused heavily, giving George an indiscernible expression.

"And?!" Sam asked impatiently.

Dean sighed, "Carol thinks she saw Jack with the demons while they were trying to escape."

"What?!" George and Sam exclaimed simultaneously. George's was far more indignant than Sam's.

"Carol says that when they went in to rescue the boy, they passed other rooms. Most were empty but she swears she saw someone who looked an awful lot like Jack in one. By the time she saw him, they were running with the kid, so she can't be a hundred percent sure b--"

"Well, I'm a hundred percent sure Carol needs her eyes checked!" George blurted out, before retracting her neck and looking apologetic, "Sorry, that was unnecessary. Carol is lovely and I'm sure it was a terrifying situation." She paused and then looked at Dean with a pleading expression, "That being said: she's WRONG! I just finished spilling my guts out to you about an identity crisis over the fact that my entire family doesn't exist! And the one good thing that came out of it is that now I know I'm meant to be here! The only answer I'm missing is why I'm here and helping you both--finding jack--that's the only answer that makes any sense. It's why I feel so strongly about going to Oregon with you. Think about it, what other reason could there possibly be for this weird ass situation if not to help you locate Jack?" Sam gulped a bit, a few suggestions running through his mind quickly. Dean was contemplating her words, weighing his options carefully. George sighed and continued, "Listen, I don't know who Carol saw, but I. Promise. You. It wasn't Jack! We need to keep going; we are headed the right way, I know it! Jack--"

"Is in danger and if we don't find him soon he could die, George," Dean sounded stern. He was irritated, but trying not to raise his voice. "We can't risk it!"

George took his new, huffy tone as a personal challenge, matching it with some added neck twists for emphasis, "Which is exactly why we need to keep going toward Oregon, because that's where he is!"

"Both of you, to your corners!" Castiel scolded suddenly, both of them looking about ready to punch the other. "Our primary goal is to find Jack and get him home safe. We have two leads and enough people to follow both. I'll go back to the motel and see if I can find a car to borrow, and head to Butte. The three of you keep following George's lead."

"Cas--"

"No arguments. Enough time has been wasted and, you're right, Dean, he's in danger. That being said," Cas cut Dean off when he tried to interrupt, "George is right, too."

"I am?" George was surprised by the support.

"She is?!" Dean was suspect.

"Yes. It's clear she feels very strongly about Jack being in Oregon and I trust her."

"I do, too," Sam agreed.

George's eyes went wide at the both of them, "You do?" 'Surprised' didn't even begin to cover it.

"Yes, I do," Castiel answered definitively. "Now, you should settle the bill and get going. If you find Jack--"

"We'll call you right away," Sam finished understandingly as he stood up from the booth to handle the check. He stepped away, leaving George to sit in a state of semi-shock, silently mulling over the concept of trust.

Dean's brow was furrowed, staring at the table intently. After a minute he nodded, addressing Cas, "I'll walk you out."

The two men began to head for the exit, and George leapt up, "Wait!" She stepped in front of Cas and looked him over, "OK, um, OK, look, I-I'm nervous about you leaving but I get it, I guess," She shot Dean a dirty look over Cas' shoulder. "Just… please be careful. Don't do anything stupid, OK? If you think to yourself 'Dean would do that!' do the opposite, yes?"

As Dean rolled his eyes, Castiel smiled kindly in response to her concern. With a gentle nod he assured, "I'll be careful. I think it goes without saying that I want you all," he looked at Dean over his shoulder pointedly, "to do the same."

George nodded in agreement and hesitated before throwing her arms around him and hugging tightly. Cas stood in place, receiving her hug awkwardly. Not until George suggested he hug back did he carefully lift his arms and pat her on the back quickly. When she let go, she gave him a nervous grimace and the two men left.

#sam winchester fanfiction #sam winchester #sam winchester fanfic #sam winchester x original character #sam winchester x original female character #supernatural #supernatural fanfiction #supernatural fanfic #spn fanfic series #spn fanfiction

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flowers-and-colored-hair · 7 years

Text

Don't write fics when you're high

You can literally see when it hits me

Dan and Phil were a package deal. You couldn't get one without the other. It had been that way for a number of years, and they wouldn't have it any other way. That is until 2012 rained down on them like a hail storm. It was also supposed to be the Mayan apocalypse, so perhaps constant fighting wasn't so terrible compared to the end of the world. Although there were some screaming matches that made Phil think otherwise. Before the horrible age of hatred turned its ugly head, they told each other everything: their fears, their insecurities, their weaknesses. Now, however, they were using those as ammunition. "Phil!" Dan screeched from his bedroom. Phil rolled his eyes and ignored his boyfriend. It was a wonder they hadn't broken up, yet, but not really. Deep down they both wanted this to pass and weren't ready to let go of their relationship. Dan marched to his room and swung the door open, letting it slam against the wall. "Phillip, what the fuck is this?!" Once again, he was ignored. It was a childish tactic, but it worked a forth of the time. Dan would yell a few times and eventually march off in frustration after getting no response. Unfortunately, this was not one of those times. Dan marched up to Phil and shoved his phone in front of his face. "Jesus Christ, Dan, I'm busy," Phil pushed the phone out of his view. "I haven't got time for whatever's got your briefs in a wad this time." "It's a picture of you with a hickey from 2009! And it's tagged with #phan proof. Now what have you got to say about that?" "I've seen that post. If anything, your reply is the real proof." He made it a point to not look up from his computer screen. Dan knew he was right. Had he not replied how he did back in '09, they could have thought the hickey was from anyone. Still, he was too frustrated to think rationally. He marched off, slamming the door shut and muttering curses. Phil groaned and rubbed his forehead. This was taking a serious toll on his mental state, well, both of their mental states. They were always stressed about little things, whether it be what to eat for dinner or which show to watch. It wasn't that they were actually stressed about those particular things, but they were deflecting the negative energy on smaller aspects of their lives. It was only ten at night, but Phil wanted to turn in early. At least in his dreams, the two were still together and happy. He found himself sleeping a lot lately: waking up later, going to sleep earlier, and napping throughout the day. It sure said a lot that he was happier unconscious. He shut down his laptop and went to brush his teeth. By the time he changed into his pajamas, he could hear Dan watching Buffy. Instinctively, he almost went to join him, but then he remembered. They were fighting. So he turned around and climbed into bed. Dan felt a little bad about the fight, and it plagued his thoughts as he tried to appreciate the romance between Tara and Willow. He should apologize. They'd been fighting nonstop and he couldn't help but to feel guilty. He clicked off the T.V. and went to Phil's room, the room that used to be both of theirs.

Softly, he rapped on the door. No response. He tried again a little louder. Nothing. "Hey, Philly?" When he went ignored once more, Dan assumed he was being ignored by his boyfriend. Was he even his boyfriend anymore? It was entirely unclear. They never officially broke up, so technically they were still together. God, Dan hated it when Phil gave him the cold shoulder. It made him feel like a child. He tried calling one more time, but he got no response. Little did he know that Phil was sound asleep. He managed to actually sleep for a full eleven hours. When he woke up at nine, he felt a bit more relaxed and at peace. It was still odd waking up alone after having Dan with him for years. It was especially annoying having to handle his morning wood all alone. In the past, Dan would be there to give him a quick handjob as he wasn't in the mood for full on sex and "a blowjob before brushing my teeth is going to have your cock smelling absolutely rank." He reached into his pajama bottoms and grabbed hold of his own prick. Dan always thought it was a bit odd that he didn't wear pants under his PJ's, but he definitely wouldn't complain either. The moment the thought of Dan entered his mind, he couldn't get him out. Dan. And his perfect body and amazing lips. God those lips, on his neck and around his cock. Phil slowly palmed himself, thinking about the way Dan reacted the first time he saw Phil naked. He actually fell silent and stared for a good twenty seconds before slowly reaching over and tentatively touching him. God that first time they were together. Dan made the prettiest noises. Phil stroked himself at a nice consistent pace, not bringing himself any closer to orgasm, but not teasing or edging himself. It felt good, but not as good as Dan. Sometimes he would get so proud of Phil and ride himself, like when he got the silver play button. They made love from dusk to dawn that night. Phil sped up slightly, remembering that. Then he heard something in the hallways. Instantly, Phil stopped and held his breath. A knock could be heard. "Phil, you up?" It was Dan. "Hey, could we talk?" Phil rolled his eyes and slowly began stroking himself again. He wasn't in the mood to get in another fight with Dan. Not completely sure why, he was oddly aroused by Dan being outside the door, completely unaware of what he was doing.

"Phil, c'mon, let's talk," Dan pleaded. He stayed silent and continued to masturbate. Perhaps this was a new kink of his. Either way, he fucked his hand and bit on his lip to avoid making any noises. His hand sped up when he heard Dan speak again. "Please don't shut me out." He flicked his wrist just the right way and threw his head back, eyes squeezed shut. He'd never gotten so close so quickly before. Phil shimmied off his pajama bottoms to have better access to, well, himself. It was getting hot in those trousers of his. The bed creaked as he took off his shirt as well and Dan heard it. "I know you're awake, Philly. You know I hate it when you ignore me, please don't do this. I'm sorry, okay?" Dan knocked on the door again, but Phil was too wrapped up in his own pleasure to care. God, his lover was right outside his door begging for forgiveness as he touched himself. Phil thought himself a pervert while grabbed the back of his own neck with his left hand and tried to control his breathing. He soon realizing he wasn't just holding onto his neck. No, he had reached a little lower and sunken his nails into the skin. He really was a freak. What could he say? Phil liked it rough, and so did Dan. After sex, they'd both be covered in bruises and scratch marks. "I don't wanna apologize to a door, Phil, please! Don't you wanna patch things up between us?" Dan asked desperately. "We've been in love for so long, don't throw that away. I love you." With that, Phil found himself cumming all over himself. That was always a thing for him, Dan telling him he loved him. "Fine then, if you don't even care enough to respond." Oh shit. He could hear Dan marching away. Phil got up and quickly stumbled around trying to put his pajama bottoms on in a haste, but by the time he did, he could hear the front door slam. Groaning, Phil went to the window in the main room to see if he could spot Dan. Sure enough, he was out there walking away. Phil was about to call him when he noticed the boy's phone on their coffee table. Phil waited by that stupid window for hours waiting for Dan. He really wanted to make things right. Dan had been mature enough to apologize, but Phil was too busy diddling himself. God, he felt like a moron for that. Then he spotted him. Dan was loitering around the front of their building, kicking a rock around. It seemed he didn't want to go in, so Phil grabbed a coat and ran out to meet him. When Dan saw him coming from the building, he huffed and leaned on a lamp post, refusing to look at him. "Dan, I'm sorry," he started. "I shouldn't have ignored you." "Then why did you? I've been stressing out all day about what it would take for you to forgive me." Dan looked at Phil. Choose your own adventure: (scroll down to your letter) A. "It doesn't matter why I did, I love you and you love me, and that's all that matters. B. "Because I was tooting my own horn." A. "It doesn't matter why I did, I love and you and you love me, and that's all that matters," Phil promised, taking a step towards Dan. Dan looked at him like he wasn't sure if he should trust him or not, but he did. Of course he did. He ran into Phil's arms and melted. "Can this be the end of our fighting? Please?" Phil pressed a soft kiss against Dan's forehead. "Of course, bear. Now let's get you inside." B. Phil looked at his boyfriend and sighed. "Because I was tooting my own horn." Dan frowned at his boyfriend in confusion. "You were bragging?" "Not exactly." Phil awkwardly began shifting from foot to foot. "My horn is my penis." The brunet stared at Phil in a mixture of both disbelief, disgust, relief, and another emotion that he couldn't quite identify. "You are so not that bendy," he finally said. "The day you self-suck is the day it snows in hell." Bleep bloop blop You guys I'm too high

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existentialstatesofmind · 7 years

Conversation

Weekend Fun

Clare: looked around the table. It was on the tip of her tongue to ask who Bren was but something about the way Kota's family was acting made her think she should just wait until Dakota was ready to tell her himself. Especially since even his mom didn't want to about him. She mentally did a head count trying to figure out if it was possible that Dakota had another brother. Clare thought she'd meet everyone but she realized now that includding Kota there were 'only' four brothers plus Kelly but Dakota had specifically said he had five sibilings and only one sister. When Clare had met everyone she'd assumed that he'd worded that badly and meant there were six kids in his family. "Good to know, I just won't go in there." Clare didn't plan to explore Dakota's house by herself anyway. She smiled at Stacy knowing if she'd made it this long without angering the Grandma's spirit, Clare would be just fine. Besides the Andersons didn't strike Clare as being super uptight about things like girls sleeping in the same beds as boys. As long as they weren't doing anything it was fine. Such a nice change. Clare often felt like she couldn't be herself around her family because they'd judge her for having so many friends who were boys. It was dumb, she wasn't going over to their houses to play kissing games or anything else they were so worried about. Why couldn't her parents just trust her? Clare was confused when she realized Dakota and his sibilings weren't talking about their Grandma being in their hearts and memories. Had they really divided up her ashes?! Clare wasn't going to ask. There were somethings she didn't need to know (she'd be spooked if she found out Kota kept his piece in his pocket somtimes, for example), and it might've been in her will. Clare didn't expect Emi to answer everything she asked her. It was a lot and Emi was only five. She just wasn't going to underestimate Emi and talk down to her. She had hated it when teenagers and adults did that to her. "Yeah! Like how some words in English start with a hard or soft C." She looked at the paper Emi wrote on. "The second symbol is the ee sound?" Clare checked to make sure she had it right. Clare wasn't sure if she would recognize it on a menu (so she'd know not to order it). Maybe if she tried to practice drawing the symbols at home for fun. They'd never look like Emi's. It was a beautiful language though and Clare was interested in learning what she could. "English is a lot easier than Japanese but we don't start learning how to write in cursive until third grade and then we're not allowed to turn in papers in print again until middle school. At least the symbols you can already draw are cool. Plus you get to learn more languages than the other kids around here." Clare comforted her. If she was here long enough, she'd be taking French in school and could chose Spanish as an elective too. "I'd rather play with a live octopus than eat it too." She admitted, smiling and laughing at Emi's story. "I hope we can get it fried. However, the California roll sounds delicious. I love avocados and I like crab too so imitation meat is fine by me." Clare smiled at Kota. "I can't wait to go to New York, it sounds like my kind of city." Her parents had promised a trip there. She just didn't know when. With the way things were going, she seriously doubted they'd all go as a family. It would probably be like the ski trip she took to Maine with Dad and Darcy while Mom stayed home. "Oh. Is Tokyo far from where you lived?" Clare kissed him softly in reply. She'd been oblivious. She thought Dakota had a girlfriend at another school and wanted to be the kind of friends who gave each other dating advice. Even when she'd found out he didn't, Clare just didn't think she'd be his type. Sometimes you got a second chance to be a first girlfriend and that was pretty special. Clare didn't see any reason why she couldn't consider Dakota her first real boyfriend if their trial period went well. K.C took her on all of one date, it hadn't been much of a relationship. She'd actually spent more time 'dating' Eli before realizing they'd rather stay friends. After they rode back to the Andersons, Clare got out of the van and waited on Dakota to get Emi. She went inside with them after it was decided that Bren wasn't there despite the light being on. "Okay. If Bren asks for it." Clare told Kota's mom hesitantly not sure what it meant when a mom gave you permission to hit a son you hadn't met yet. He must be a troublemaker since she'd sent Bren, and only Bren away to school, and he'd gotten expelled. No one seemed to like him. Up until now, Clare thought Dakota had a great relationship with all of his sibilings. To her they were all really lucky. Her much smaller family didn't have as much love to go around. This turn of events was surprising. She put the bag from the restaurant in the Anderson's icebox while Dakota was gone. After they'd walked to his room, Clare took off her shoes too. "Thank you. How cute, I love it." She said referring to the bathroom's sign. She raised her hand up to touch the sign, her fingers traced lightly over the writing before Clare went inside the bathroom carrying the bag Kelly had given her earlier. "I'll take purple." Clare said selecting a soft-bristled tooth brush. "Has this been approved by the American Dental Association?" She joked since they'd been talking about Home Alone at the restaurant. Soon as Dakota left, she took off everything except her panties and put on the grey pj pants and pink short sleeve shirt from Victoria's Secret. Clare stuffed her clothes in the bag and checked her reflection before leaving the bathroom. She got into the bed, wrapping herself in the blanket like they'd talked about so they could cuddle without it being super awkward. Clare looked at Dakota shyly and lay on her side facing him, she rested her head on his chest. "Is this okay? Are you comfortable?"

Kota: watched as Emi taught Clare about the symbols. "No, it makes the shi sound. There aren't any ee sounds in Japanese." she corrected. "Good night has six symbols." she said and started to write the symbols. "O-ya-su-mi-na-si." she said pointing to each symbol. "That's the thing Emi has trouble with." Kota pointed out. "She knows more languages and sometimes uses them." he added. "So do you." Emi whined. "That girl was lost." he stated. "Pero el telefono?" Emi asked looking at him. "Again, the person didn't know English. Were you listening in?" he asked her. "I tried to listen into your other conversation, but you were talking too fast." she said honestly. "That's because the other person was in New York and that's how fast they talk." he explained and listened to Clare talk to Emi, then smiled at Clare when she smiled at him. "They talk faster than Eminem raps in New York." Ash pointed out. "Only if they're in a hurry or if you're ordering food at certain places. Normally they talk as fast as Eminem raps." he explained. "We decided to go to New York without Kota, biggest mistake in our life." Dom complained. "No calling him while he was with grandpa was the bigger mistake." Ash added and Kota looked at them. "That's because you hung up on me when I answered my phone, then again when I tried calling back. You even hung up on grandpa." Kota stated. "That's because you answered in Spanish." Dom argued. "I was in freaking Spain. I thought you were a client, you called grandpa's phone. When I called back you told me 'English' then hung up the three times I tried calling." he stated. "But you hung up on us when we called your phone." Ash said. "Because I was busy and couldn't play your game." Kota said honestly. "Stop fighting." Emi stated and Kota sighed. "Lo siento." he said looking at her. "Esta bueno, pero no mas." she said sticking her tongue out at Ash and Dom. "No mas." he assured and with a smile and both Ash and Dom apologized as well. "It's only good if you can talk fast to understand and keep up with the New Yorkers. I mean we got invited by grandpa to the same places he took Kota, but we'd have to be there three days after they were since they were there on business for the first three days and the food they were eating seemed odd at the time so we didn't go." Dom stated. "Fried plantains are great." Kota said looking at them. "Should've accepted. We aren't going on business trips any time soon." he confirmed. "I have to take over MB and work on new products, we start selling them in America soon." he said honestly. He kissed Clare back as she asked Emi the question. "Well, we lived in part of Tokyo called Narita, Chiba Prefecture. It's over an hour to Tokyo City." she stated. When they were getting ready for bed, Kota listened to Clare say she was taking purple and nodded, then laughed a bit when she asked about the toothbrush knowing she was joking. Once she joined him in his bed and they were cuddling, he nodded. "Yea, I'm comfortable." he whispered and kissed her head before falling asleep.

#wf

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