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#“Why settle for reality when you can create your own world and be the hero?”
superbug06 · 1 month
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Something something phighting oc again
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listlessdionysian · 6 months
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Stories Are All We Are
I've loosely paraphrased a line from Cristina Bacchilega's 2015 paper Narrative Cultures, Situated Story Webs, and the Politics of Relation in the title - because it's something I think about a lot. Hell, I think about that paper regularly when I'm working - especially in the long hours were the words come like a slow drip from a leaky roof and I'm under it with a sauce pan just waiting, waiting for that soft plink.
But there's another, more poignant line (paragraph, really), and I want to unpack this with you if I may:
"Stories construct our worlds and us at the same time, emerging from actual negotiations with and in these worlds. Stories create and weave together the social networks that define us whether we belong to them or we other them. Stories shape our conceptions of these worlds, and they have material impact on these worlds, the human ones and the other living ones (natural and spiritual) we are a part of."
Daniel Quinn's novel Ishmael talks about stories as interrelations: narratives (and acts) that state how we connect to each other and the world around us. By extension, a culture is a group of people who have agreed on a story to make into a reality. He used this framing as a way to explain why western-society seems so hell-bent on its own ecological destruction: it is pursuing a story where the normal rules of resource use, population growth, and just generally sharing the planet and taking your turn, don't apply. It's a story where humans have ascended to knowledge held only by the gods.
That Bacchilega quote says it better than I can - a story is both an expression of our understanding, as well as a tool or even a force that impacts, expands, or even limits that understanding. When we talk about history as a narrative - we mean exactly this. Each volume of history, each new perspective is an expression or interpretation of past events - both presenting contemporary attitudes to the actions or attitudes of past generations, and also a shaping of cultural knowledge that may influence or affect future generations.
David Stannard (1992) made effective use of Leonard Thompson's conception of 'political mythology' in his analysis of European colonial violence in the Americas. Putting it as simply as I can, a political mythology is a narrative that tries to create a historical, or even sometimes 'scientific', basis for a ruling ideology or class.
Think Social Darwinism, or those people that bleat on about 'Alpha Males'. It's the pursuit of rationalisation or exoneration. Previously settled (or mostly settled, inasmuch as any of these things can be) historical discussions around the evils of imperialism, colonialism, racism, and any stripe or shade or form of bigotry can be reopened if it suits someone's platform or goals.
It can also be much, much smaller.
Each of us have our own stories - and isn't that just a worthless, pithy statement at times? But it is true. We are each creating and living out our own stories - billions of narrative threads and character arcs jostling for space alongside each other. The threads weave in and out, casting little fields of affect on each other, only to disappear over the horizon as they pursue their own terminus. The way we tell those stories to ourselves and to others affects us, deeply. If we behave badly, or mistreat others, we are tempted to explain away our behaviour. The narrative shifts and warps in order to keep us at its centre, as the hero of the narrative.
So it pays to think while you're writing.
What is the story I'm telling and how does it connect to others? Am I working to explain or exonerate, or to criticise or condemn? Who does this help? Who does this serve?
That's not to say it should be a conscious part of the drafting process, exactly. I know and have heard of many writers scuttling themselves in the pursuit of an ideologically pure novel - finding that such pursuits tend to seize, rather than grease, the wheels of storytelling.
No - save it for the edits. That time when you've set your work aside for a little while and come back to it, hoping you've gained sufficient distance and objectivity to amend and improve your work. Read it, involve yourself in it at both narrative and craft levels - and question yourself.
As I said before: stories express and they influence.
What are you expressing?
What are you hoping to change?
Further Reading (if you like)
Bacchilega, Cristina, ‘Narrative Cultures, Situated Story Webs, and the Politics of Relation’ in Narrative Culture, Vol. 2, No. 1, Spring 2015
Stannard, R., 1992, American Holocaust: The Conquest of the New World, Oxford: Oxford University Press
Quinn, D, 1995, Ishmael, New York: Bantam Books
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niqhtlord01 · 3 years
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Humans are weird: Assassins
( Don’t forget to come see my on my new patreon and support me for early access to stories and personal story requests :D https://www.patreon.com/NiqhtLord )
 The soft light of the morning dawn slowly filtered into the room through cracks between the lavish curtains. Streaks of light bounded off the polished gold detailing of the rooms furniture and made the room appear as if the very stars themselves had come to adorn themselves upon the walls. So bright were the reflections that it managed to find their way underneath several layers of bed sheets and directly into the face of ambassador Glifin.
Roused from his seemingly peaceful sleep Glifin slowly pushed off the sheets one by one and rolled to his feet. The loud thuds of his hooves touching the floor sent a shudder through the room as he stood and stretched out, his general grogginess slowly shaking off. With a loud yawn finally leaving his throat he rose and shambled over to his desk to begin his day’s work.
Tonight he was hosting a party honoring visiting royalty from his home world on Argon. The prince had decided he wanted to visit this miserable planet he had been stationed on, though why anyone would want to visit this world was beyond him.
Glifin’s posting on the human homeworld had been sold to him as a great honor but in reality it had been a means to keep him from continuing his political rise. On Argon he had been a senator whose mere whisper was enough to make generals and minor nobles quiver in fear. His star struck ascension didn’t go unnoticed however and just before he was to be elected into the office of Artock Supreme and reside over the entire senate the royal family had stepped in and given him the position of ambassador to humanity.
Within the spam of a solar month he was shipped off the throne world and sent to this backwater dump of a world; were he had to smile and feign sincerity to these miserable sacks of flesh all the while his political powerbase slowly began to crumble in the senate.
Now fully consumed by feelings of dread over his situation Glifin did not hear the sudden knock at the door. Only after several more knocks did Glifin look up from his paper work.
“Come in.”
The door slowly opened and Glifin’s aide Jafal walked in and bowed.
“My apologies for disturbing you at this early hour, but Mr. Robinson has arrived with your evening wear for tonight’s event.”
Glifin nodded and shuffled his papers back into his desk and locked it just as a new figure entered the room.
“Say what you want about Argonian fashion, but they do have such a wonderful sense of aesthetics when it comes to room decoration.”
A slim human emerged from the doorway pushing a small cart with a metal rod built in holding up two clothing bags.
“You have a problem with Argonian styles?” Glifin said as he rose to his feet and walked over to Robinson as he pulled out a tiny box device and casually threw it down on the floor. The moment of contact it sprung open and in an instance a large set of mirrors emerged from it giving an impressive view from all sides.
“Oh far be it for me to question ones culture, “ Robinson continued as he opened the first bag and stepped aside for Glifin to see the contents, “but some would consider the amount of dead mammals your people adorn on themselves to be a tad morbid.”
From the corner of his eye Glifin saw Jafal’s face redden from anger but with a motion from his ambassador kept his tongue still.
“I would find it surprising for a human to find anything morbid with the amount of toxins you willingly consume.”
Robinson flashed a brief smile and shrugged. “You do have me there; personally caffeine will most likely be the end of me one day, but we’re not here to talk about my eventual demise.”
“An end that will come much sooner if you continue to waste my time with idle chatter.”
Humanities incessant need for small talk and idle conversation was something Glifin had never come to terms with; and this human fashion designer was by far the worst example he had ever put up with. Part of him viewed it as a challenge to see how long he could endure before snapping the tiny man’s neck, and though such a moment would no doubt bring him great pleasure the other part of him realized that Robinsons work was well regarded among prominent members of society. Not just with other humans, but with other alien dignitaries who had embassies on the human homeworld. It had been surprisingly an ambassador from the Hive that had recommended the human’s services when it was suggested that Glifin update his style to match his new role.
Walking up to the first black bag that Robinson had opened Glifin inspected the wardrobe.
Inside was a finely trimmed suit of Rygonian Leaper fur of a dark blue with a sash of Haponi tongue and a dashing pair of pants metal grey Roller Worm hide.
It was custom in Argonian culture to wear the skin of that which you have killed, thus the outfit before him was a prime example Glifin’s traditions.
“A fine work indeed,” Glifin said as he ran his fingers across the material, feeling the roughness against his skin. “For a human” he finished as he turned and smirked at Robinson.
“With the effort it took to obtain the materials you requested I would say it is nothing less than an example a miracle performed before your very eyes.”
Glifin stopped his examination of the attire and looked at the human. “For a miracle you sound so…displeased with your work.”
Robinson crossed his arms for a moment and pouted as if considering his next words.
“My work is perfection, I can assure you, but a man in my trade is not just meant to listen to the specifications of their client but their intention as well.”
“And your point?” Glifin queried.
After a moment he outstretched his hand and casually gestured to the Argonian clothing. “Is this really the message you want to be sending?”
Glifin looked at the suit again then back at Robinson. “I don’t understand.”
“If you go to the event dressed like this it will send the message that you still value your traditions, but I worry that it shows a disconnect with your current situation; almost as if you are attempting to relive the past.”
“You would appear as an old war hero trapped in past glories that the other guests would acknowledge, but not make to engage in conversation.”
Glifin opened to rebuke the human but stopped himself as he pondered the man’s words. Robinson stepped forward to the other black case. “Now this,” Robinson said as he slowly pulled down the zipper revealing the contents, “this would make you not only the talk of the party, but would make you the talk of the after party all the way back to your homeworld were many people would no doubt be very much interested in your on goings.”
“Each piece has been designed by some of the most dangerous animals on this planet, and in some cases far more ravenous then anything back on your respectable homeworld.”
Robinson went about and pointed out the specific materials used one by one.
“The body is made from a powerful species that inhabits the various swamps and wetlands around the globe with jaws so powerful they could cut you in two with a single bite.”
“Each of the buttons along the coat are the fangs of the most poisonous reptilian creatures on the planet; each one capable of killing a human let alone an Argonia ten times over with a single drop of their venom.”
“Now the pants I am particularly proud of as they are the skin of the deadliest hunter of all the planets seas. They can smell fresh blood from miles away and commonly take on prey twice their size.”
Gliffin heard Robinson go through the list of creatures but his expression remained emotionless.
“Why would these creatures be any more interesting than my own worlds?”
Robinson smiled. “Because everyone from your world already knows about them and have hunted the same creatures for generations. Yet I would be so bold as to wager my humble shop that none of them have ever faced down the black eyed stare of a great white shark, nor wrestled the deadly crocodile demons of the swamps, and most certainly have been quick enough to pluck out the teeth of rattle snakes just as they lunge to strike.”
“Neither have I,” Gliffin said with a hint of disgust in his tone, “and you would make a liar out of me for saying so.”
“My dear ambassador, who but you could say what you do or don’t in your free time?”
Robinson leaned forward and whispered into Gliffin’s ear “I am no doubt sure many of your females would find the idea of a striking Argonian such as yourself sneaking off to go hunting the unknown for sport a rather attractive quality.”
Glifin looked at the new set of clothing and then back at the original set of traditional clothes. He went back and forth for several moments before finally settling his gaze on the traditional garments.
“Take these away.”
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The lights outside Robinson’s humble shop slowly went off one by one as he walked between the displays straightening out garments and folding tossed aside pieces customers had casually put aside when the door rang.
“I’m sorry but we are closed for the night.” Robinson said as he returned behind the counter with a stack of clothes.
The figure slowly approached the counter and took off their hat. Robinson looked up from the register to see the figure was a Rohanan; a species known for its gel like appearance yet could collect random bits and bobs to create a sudo skeleton and present themselves as humanoid.
“That’s alright,” the Rohanan said, “I am here to pay for a set I ordered for a….friend.”
“Then they are most fortunate to have a friend such as you then.”
Robinson’s smiling nature unnerved the Rohanan but nonetheless they placed a small envelope on the table and slid it across. Robinson placed a hand on it and tapped his fingers several times against the contents inside before opening it and spilling the credit chips on to the table.
“Is it satisfactory?” the Rohanan said, their nervousness building as the human finished counting the chips.
“Oh yes indeed; I believe you have paid in full for your order.” With a swipe of his hand the human pushed the chips back into the envelope and sealed it. “Always a pleasure to deal with such an honest and upstanding man such as yourself during such troubling times.”
Robinson leaned in towards the Rohanan, his expression shifting from smiling to one of mild concern. “I heard there was a most unfortunate incident up at the Argonian embassy several nights ago.”
“Several guests including the visiting prince and ambassador himself all died from poisoning.” The Rohanan confirmed.
“How gruesome!” Robinson said as he recoiled in shock and finished putting away the remaining clothes while he talked over his shoulder.
The Rohanan regarded the human for a moment before continuing. “The strangest thing was that the poison was not native to this world, but is most common in the Hagar system under Dovorian rule.”
“A most embarrassing situation I am sure considering the Dovorian and Argonian people despise each other.”
“Indeed; one might wonder how such a toxin came into contact with them.”
Robinson shrugged and turned as he finished placing the final shirt back into the display. “With all of those fangs, bones, and animal skins I would not be surprised if someone grabbed a tooth or two that hadn’t been fully drained of its contents.”
The Rohanan laughed and placed their hat back on their head just as they stopped at the door.
“You were worth every penny, assassin.”
“An assassin you say?” Robinson’s smile returned and he casually waved to the departing customer “You must have me mistaken for someone else, as I am but a simple tailor.”
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cherryblossomtease · 3 years
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Chapter 15
18+ only
warnings and summary - Masterlist
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Because sometimes all you need is a simple reminder of who started this mess in the first damn place 💜
Warnings : as always 18+ only please- dom Zemo, sub Bucky, sub reader, punishment, m/m, m/m/f, light bondage
Authors Notes: Really didn't think I would be posting this weekend but it's a holiday in the states so why not! Still working on the rest by you know, neglecting everything that matters to create this fictional world. Anyhow, I can honestly say this is by far the most graphic story I've written so I'm a little nervous but it's already done, can't change it now, and I honestly don't want to! That said I hope you enjoy reading as much as I did writing!
~
Nothing lasts forever, especially when it’s this good. And this fabricated reality is about as good as it gets. Still, you know this boat will dock soon and goodbyes will be said. There’s really no way around it, try as you might to come up with a plan to talk Bucky into staying. Even now as you fight to stay asleep, your brain is working hard to create a solution while you refuse to give into your worries so early in the day.
You turn onto your stomach ignoring the dark thoughts, choosing instead to enjoy the feel of a strong arm across your back and a leg, hairy and heavy over both of yours.
Settling again with a content sigh, sleep starts to pull you back under. Thank the stars. You really aren’t in the mood— even if your dreams apparently are.
And what had you been dreaming about anyway?
A little house on a wide cliff overlooking water, and something else? The harder you try to remember the more you feel yourself slipping back into that dream space.
There was a small animal. What was it? A rabbit? Its fluffy body too close to the edge of the cliff. But in the dream you’d stayed standing in the doorway of the little house too indifferent to go and save it….
You feel bodies moving lazily, a stream of breath along your back that tickles; arms and legs and the men they belong to not fully awake and starting to stir like you, even as you quickly slip back into sleep until you’re standing in the doorway of that house again with the warm winds on your face and a view of the French sea below. The drop is dangerous. Deadly even.
Why haven’t you started talking Bucky into staying yet? Because you don’t like thinking about it too much. That's why. You start walking towards the edge of the cliff and you’re fully aware of your worlds crossing over —real thoughts present in your dream.
It’s probably bad luck to resent good deeds, after all that’s what he’s leaving you for. He wants to go off and live the life of the hero he never got to be. That and to keep Zemo’s location safe; but that’s besides the point. Hmm… Look at me, selfish even in my dreams. You smile when you shouldn’t.
Staring over the edge of the cliff it’s suddenly clear how unstable the ground is here and you gasp as it crumbles beneath your feet without warning.
Your eyes open with a start.
Well, that was a bit on the nose. Your subconscious does like to lay it on a thick sometimes, especially when you continue to ignore the things bothering you for too long and you've been setting these feelings aside since the text came through.
But just as quickly as you’re left to shake the shadow of the eerie dream, your frown fades replaced by a slow smile.
There is a very familiar poking at your ass that can sometimes be annoying-- this morning it’s welcome. You reach back and feel for the body that the greeting belongs too, comforted by the warmth and solid muscle of Bucky’s thigh under his tight boxers.
Mmmmm, the source of my distress and my desire, you think and grin into the pillows with a soft moan when his hand, hot and strong takes hold of your hip, massaging as he presses his erection into you.
You’ll talk to him about your dreams later.
Feeling a draft where there should be warmth, you open an eye to find breaks of sunlight in the space between Helmut’s arm and torso. When you turn your head you’re met with the sight of his bare chest, broad and covered in the softest dark hair. His necklace hangs off center, and you, as always, are helpless to it.
Your hand leaves Bucky’s thigh and your fingers slide over the delicate links in the chain and down into the soft chest hair as you turn your head to find he and Bucky locked in one hell of a kiss for so early in the day. It must have been their movement or the sound of their lips that woke you and pulled you from the doom of your fatal fall.
Dreams are so strange…
Your heart flutters when Helmut lays his hand over yours pressing it tight to his chest. “Good morning love birds.” You snicker and watch Bucky pull away from Zemo looking a little embarrassed. He does pause to kiss your cheek however before getting out of bed with a long stretch.
“So where the hell are we anyway?” He asks going to the balcony door, looking out at the passing waves. “Feels like nowhere.”
Zemo is looking down at you, stroking your profile, kissing your nose. “We should be well within the middle of it actually.” He answers, eyes still fixed on you.
“Perfect” You say softly letting him pull you so close that he blocks out the light as your lips meet.
“Breakfast is ready sir,” Oeznik calls from outside the bedroom door.
Zemo grumbles at the interruption but you’re starving. “What? I’m not going anywhere” You huff turning away, trying to escape. “You just said so yourself. I've got no place to go.”
“All by design” He smiles and lets you get up, giving your ass a smack as you go. Bucky is watching from the doorway and laughs at your yelp-hop-rub combination.
Swearing under your breath you go over to the closet, grab your silk robe and pull it on over your shorts and tank top, yawning as you drag your feet over to Bucky. You pat his stomach, kissing him quickly. “Hungry?”
“Famished.”
“Lets go up.” You say tugging at him as Zemo gets up and puts on his own robe across the room. It’s not the thick one you liked from before the raft, but silk like yours— Tom Ford if memory serves— god his influence is strong. How the hell do you remember this stuff?
You watch him scratch at the back of his messy nest of hair like he always does in the mornings, somehow looking both sexy and adorable, alternating between the two with the ease of flicking a light switch. You can only smile at the enigma that is Helmut Zemo and pull Bucky away from the doors.
The three of you leave the room shuffling along, making your way down the hall to the den. Zemo trails you and Bucky accepting a small espresso from Oeznik as he watches the way you and your Sergeant interact. Neither you nor Bucky are necessarily morning people and though it’s nearly ten, you’re both somewhat irritable now that you’re actually moving around and slightly hungover from yesterdays sangrias as you make your way up to the top deck where breakfast will be served.
The sun is so bright you huff about not being able to find your sunglasses and Bucky accuses you of being a diva. The only appropriate reaction is to give him a shove.
Zemo snorts a laugh at your near sibling like banter which you’d established after so many months together, but once you find your glasses on the bar counter and get a fresh cup of coffee and a bloody Mary chaser in your body you’re feeling like a new woman ready to conquer the day… a day spent doing nothing really.
It’s all so casually decadent that it’s nearly sinful. Whats the one? The sin that doesn’t sound as good as lust but feels better after all that fornicating you’ve been doing— Sloth? Yes, you think reaching for what’s left of your blood Mary from the lounge chair, the ultimate of all the sins. Thou shalt not be a lazy ass sloth all day on your yacht.
Cheers.
You read on the deck for a while, play a few rounds of shuffle board with Bucky by the pool and attempt to best Zemo at chess in the den.
Lunch is wonderful, and you think you will need to meet this mystery chef at some point before the trip is over followed by a nap on the bedroom balcony.
When you wake up in the very late afternoon you venture down the hall with your book and unexpectedly find the men in your life moaning on the floor of the den in a tangle of beautifully tanned arms and legs. So you very quietly slip past, feeling a flush rise up your neck to your cheeks highlighting your wide but tight lipped smile.
You stay above decks giving them privacy feeling only the slightest twinge of jealousy. Not because you think you’ve been excluded but because you could use another session like last night.
A shiver runs deep in your belly thinking of the way Helmut brought you to climax, but you’re still more than happy to give them time alone. After all, you’ve had the Baron to yourself for far longer than Bucky.
You sink down onto the upper deck sofa, the image of them entwined, the sounds of their heavy breathing and Bucky’s near innocent moans enough to make you consider touching yourself but you wait, letting the urge build, one of them if not both will take care of you later.
So when Bucky comes up and finds you with a funny look on his face you’re completely confused. “Whats wrong?” You ask putting your book down.
He’s poured a drink and sits down beside you on the couch.
“I don’t know if I can do it.” He says shaking his head tossing back the bourbon.
“Do what?” You have an idea but you thought for sure he’d be eager to try, at least it looked like they were well on their way to his first time.
“Letting him control me, I’ve never had someone tell me no. Not like this.”
“Oh” You smile. It’s the no sex. The lack of it is a cruel form of control but the end results are glorious, if he could just be patient enough. “He won’t let you come?” You ask a little more patronizing than you’d intended.
“No!” Bucky whines taking his cue from you and you stifle your laughter. He’s so cute, even in the throws of his sexual agony. “And it’s making me crazy. I mean I’m already crazy but this is different.” He looks around and leans closer to you. “If you were to so much as look at my cock right now, I’d be done.” He says under his breath.
You let go and laugh rolling your eyes. Dramatics seem to come as naturally as submission to him. “That’s against the rules.” You warn eyeing him sidelong and attempting to go back to your book.
“I can’t take it. Fuck the rules.” He says again pulling the paperback from your hand.
You wave your finger in his face. “James. You’re not allowed.” You say playfully.
“Please.” He begs running his finger down your cheek, brushing your neck and gliding along your clavicle where he knows you’re sensitive.
“I can’t!” You lean away a little surprised by his attempt.
“He won’t know!”
You shake your head “I know but…” You try not to smile.
“I can’t take it.” He insists leaning in to kiss you. “I promise; it won’t take long.”
You give in and laugh sensing his desperation as you kiss. He does feel tense. The muscles of his arm and shoulder are wound tight as a chord. You smile against his lips letting him ease you down onto the couch, your book dropping to the floor as he moans, sliding his hand down your thigh, pushing your knee up and his own hips forward letting you feel what you’re fairly certain is the most rock solid hard on you’ve ever had pressed to your body. You whisper his name as his lips find their way to your neck and his hand slides between you to free himself from those amazing shorts.
“Shame, I had every intention of making your patience worth the effort. But you do love to prolong your torment, don’t you soldat.”
You gasp and Bucky hangs his head as Zemo comes sauntering over. Your laughter is a mix of nerves and feeling like you’ve been caught sneaking around with a boy like a damn teenager. It’s been years since you’ve felt a rush like this. Leave it to the Baron to stir that old excitement again.
“Don’t move” Zemo orders, pointing a finger in your face. You freeze, legs open where Bucky was, your arms tight at your sides. “Sit” He growls at Bucky who obeys begrudgingly as he slides back onto the couch.
Very quickly Zemo shoves your legs closed and grabs you by the arm pulling you up to standing. You lean away as he shakes his head keeping you close, his hold so tight you wince “I thought you knew better by now” He scolds you sounding disappointed.
“I told him not too?” You try looking as innocent as possible. You truly had no intentions of fucking him, but maybe a quick hand job?
There is a flicker of excitement in Zemo’s eyes. It's been so long since you’ve given him a reason to really go for it and you hold in your smile because you’re meant to be sad and hang your head. “I’m sorry Baron.”
He ignores your attempts to apologize and pulls you over so that you’re standing in front of Bucky. He looks you both over for a moment thinking and then smiles. You don’t know if you love or hate to see him looking so pleased. Nothing “good” ever comes of that smile.
“Look James.” He says, waiting until Bucky raises his head. “I want you to see what listening to your eager cock and not my rules get gets you— and her.” He tells Bucky before giving you his undivided attention.
Zemo turns your back to Bucky and you feel his hand between your shoulder blades pushing just a little. You bend at the waist, not all the way, just enough to make sure Bucky knows where his attention should be.
This flouncy little designer sun dress you’ve changed into after your nap only helps direct his gaze as Zemo drags the fabric up slowly so that the reveal of your ass is yet another way to torment him all on its own and you give yourself over to the Baron and wonder how bad this will be.
“Pull them down.” He tells you, his hand smoothing over your simple lace panties. His voice is not so angry as it was when he found the two of you, but every bit as firm, and you glance up at him as you hook your thumbs into the waist band. He nods and you quickly obey, pulling your underwear over the curve of your hips and ass and swear you hear Bucky groan when you bend to pull them from your ankles letting him see the diamond shape of your pussy from behind for just a second, your smile hidden from view.
When you stand again, Zemo offers his forearm. You rest your stomach against him, your hand gripping his shirt, the other you will have to try very hard not to cover your backside with because you know that the breeze will be the last nice thing that you feel.
He tosses your dress back up holding you, adjusting the way he stands just a little so that you are safe but immobile.
“Count them off; to five.” He says leaning just a bit closer. The tone in his voice is confident. Zemo knows that you’re well aware of what this means.
“Yes Baron.” You say exhaling, trying to prepare, but five? Fuck. He does not intend on holding back. If he was being playful he would give you ten or more, but five? He knows you won’t be able to take more that that.
You dig your fingers into his forearm and hold your breath.
The first strike makes you cry out.
The way Zemo can raise his hand and bring it down on your ass is unrivaled. He doesn’t mess around. There is no teasing, no playing, no cute little taps to warm you up. Just instant punishment.
“One.”
Your voice shakes and the rousing heat of adrenaline spreads through your arms and legs.
Again he lifts his hand and brings it down quickly with a stinging force that sends shock waves through your body. Your cry is weaker this time, trailing longer.
“Two.”
You pull his shirt tighter into your fist, your cheeks are on fire already when you feel the air stir as his hand rises again. You wonder if Bucky is watching, you wonder if he see’s how your thighs flex and your flesh shakes when the Baron strikes you.
You close your eyes and draw in your bottom lip trying not to moan, but you arch your back and your hips begin to circle ever so slightly with the anticipation of the next smack. You’re practically whimpering as you offer up your backside for more.
Zemo can feel the light vibration of pleasure sounding in your chest and his laughter is a low, very amused rumble as he raises his hand just a little higher this time.
The next smack lands and you toss your head back with a gasp. You would have gone to your knees if he wasn’t strong enough to hold you up. “Three” You whisper but you don’t move. The air brushes your pussy, wet in spite of your reddening skin.
“Don’t look away.” Zemo says.
There is the answer to your previous question. Bucky likes it, but it’s not always easy for him to watch.
“James!” Zemo snaps and waits. Bucky must be looking again because you feel the Baron move.
The fourth strike comes and you steady yourself knowing you can take it, wanting it, loving it as much as your feel your legs shaking. “Four”
You’re breathing hard, as you anticipate the final blow, desperate for it to be over but sorry for it to end. You rest against him for just a second feeling both safe in his hold and powerless to his dominance.
When the last of your punishment lands you hang your head, rounding your spine unable to offer yourself anymore. You can not pretend and this is why he’s given you so few.
Letting your hips drop as your body shudders and a single tear falls, you whisper, “Five” And only Helmut hears you say it.
Very gently he pulls your dress down, the soft cotton is cool over your burning skin and he turns you around to face him.
He brushes the tear from your cheek, holding you in such a way that you can go limp in his arms. “It wasn’t that bad, you’re just out of practice.” He says smiling at you knowing it wasn’t kind either.
You’d love for him to know just once. Maybe let Bucky give him a slap across the ass to make it fair. But when you look at him the thought is all wrong if not hilarious and you just shrug a little and hang your head again, resting on his chest.
“No breaking rules.” He scolds affectionately, “Even if you’re only trying to help. Understood?”
“Yes Baron.” Your voice is very small.
He gives a nod, kisses your forehead and looks over his shoulder at James. “So, is this what you wanted?”
“No.”
“No… no I don’t think it is.” He agrees. “But I understand. She’s damn near impossible to resist still you must learn to control yourself. Apparently I’ve not made that clear. Perhaps a more direct approach.”
You both look at him wide eyed. What’s more direct than this you think not even close to recovered from your spanking.
“Both of you, go down to our bedroom.” He says as though nothing has ever been more obvious “Take off your clothes. Wait for me on the bed.”
You look at Bucky. He looks at you.
“You fucked up,” You mouth to him.
Bucky just gets up and pushes past you both.
*
“I suppose you could say I’ve had to get creative with my plans for you. I know that pain is something you can’t respond to in ways that she can.” Zemo says, smiling as he glances down at Bucky and then over his shoulder at you on your knees behind him. “Have you finished?”
You look up from what you’re doing, hoping it’s right. “Yes, I think so?”
He comes around to look at the rope binding Bucky’s wrists. It’s just for show to heighten the experience. Of course Bucky could break free if he wanted to— his strength is no match for a few rough fibers— but this is a training of the mind as well as the body. “You see, pleasure can be just as awful.” Zemo says, his voice making you shiver as he checks your work, tugging and tightening the rope a little more.
Leaning in close, he strokes Bucky’s jaw, his finger reaching to trace the spine of his ear and you smile when the hairs on Bucky’s right arm raise and Zemo loses the air of control for a second simply becoming the man who cares for the other deeply. “The irony of tying you to a chair to satisfy you is not lost on me, based on what I know of your past. But if you can endure it, I promise it will be nothing like the pain you’ve known. I could never hurt you in that way. Still, if at any time this is too much, if it triggers memories that change it from what it’s meant to be, please— James— say the word, your word and it stops.”
Bucky nods. “I will” He says softly.
“Nothing now?” Zemo asks genuinely wanting to know. Bucky shakes his head. “No, nothing.”
Zemo gives a confident nod and kisses the back of Bucky’s head patting his cheek a little harder than he needs too. “I only want to make you feel good— eventually.” He teases and Bucky rolls his eyes with a small laugh.
Pleased, Zemo pushes up and goes to sit in the soft chair across the room, notably more comfortable than the one Bucky has been placed in. Although the more obvious differences being, Zemo is not bound, Zemo is not naked, and Zemo has not been so gently stroked and toyed with that he’s been left with a perfectly vulnerable erection like Bucky has.
You’d had a hard time focusing on the ropes as the Baron made it happen. The way he’d taken Bucky in hand, winding down the length of his sex was in a word, mesmerizing. And when Bucky made that sound, that soft, pleading sound and Zemo stopped — his brow raised with such smug confidence— you wondered who would break first, you or Bucky. He’d quickly brought his hand up with one last tease, his fingers swirling around the curving head of Bucky’s member only to let go as though he’d lost interest.
Bucky’s groan was deep. He was beyond frustrated, but instead of breaking out of his restrains and fucking one of the two of you, he sat there just waiting to be punished for breaking rules in the first place.
He watches as you come and kneel before him, naked yourself as you’ve been told to be. He actually looks slightly scared but mostly curious. His erection is as always flawlessly pretty, arching up and back, smooth while perfectly veined and so inciting.
You only know what it is you’re meant to do to him because you’ve had it done to you before. You figure it’s very similar, only the mechanics are different because his is a man. If Zemo doesn’t approve, he’ll tell you.
The Baron in charge picks up his drink, the ice rattling as he takes a sip and lets the scene settle in his sights for a moment. He likes to see the two of you together, his two helpless things— his to play with and his to love.
“Begin.”
Bucky inhales, but you smile at him to show that it won’t hurt— it’ll just drive him mad.
First you take the little bottle of body oil from the floor and put some in your hands rubbing them together.
He raises his brow watching you and starts to relax thinking he might understand now. You take him in hand and start to stroke, you are after all very good at this. Over and over again, up and down his long, thick shaft, curving your hand over the head of his cock until he moans and rolls his eyes shut. When he opens them he does seem a bit confused by this sudden attention and he flashes a smile because it feels so good. If this is all that’s been planned, he could get used to this sort of punishment.
The room is quiet, there’s nothing but the soft hum of the ship, his breathing and the wonderfully obscene sound of the oil you’re using against his skin as you work faster…
It’s not long before you feel him stiffen and his breath grows quicker, his thighs flex, his hips raise an inch and he starts to moan softly, a staccato sound of pleasure that makes even your heart beat faster. He’s been waiting and suffering through so much you can feel the joy of release seeping into every inch of his body.
“You feel it happening?” Zemo asks softly. “The start, the pressure mounting? You see, she is very good. And she will get you there James, every time— right to the edge”
You yank your hand away and he jerks forward mouth open cock twitching with the start of an orgasm he will not have.
“To the edge” Zemo chuckles. “A cruel punishment for a greedy man who must learn to wait.”
Bucky quickly lifts his head, the realization flashing in his eyes as his chest rises and falls. He looks down at you.
You smile and reach for him again.
*
“Please” He begs breathless.
“Not yet” Zemo says leaning forward a bit in his seat, the drink in his hand all but forgotten. You notice the ice has long since melted as you wait for permission, watching over your shoulder.
He gives you a nod and you turn back to Bucky.
Wrapping your hand around him again, you feel him so solid he’s like stone. His thighs are flexed, his hips raise up in the chair as you begin to jerk your hand up and down and the light reflecting off the oil makes you both shine like gold.
He moans and you watch the muscles of his abs flex as he feels the orgasm coming on, helpless to it and your skilled hand.
“I’m going to come.” He groans sounding sorry for and drops his hips.
“No, you won’t. I did not say that you can” Zemo says like the villain behind you.
“I can’t it hold back” Bucky pants, his voice is thin he sounds like he very well might lose control and you feel him pulse in your palm. You twist your hand around sliding it down to the base thinking it might help hold him off if your focus is less near the collection of nerve endings.
Zemo stands and comes to you, tapping your shoulder. You let him go with a quick up and down and Bucky’s disappointment is the saddest thing you’ve ever heard.
When Zemo looks down at the wonderfully pitiful sight, Bucky shuts his eyes. “Yellow.” He whispers. “Please, yellow.”
“All right.” Zemo says kindly and gives his head a rub. “Rest”
“Thank you.” Bucky manages.
You stand not caring what Zemo says and kiss Bucky’s cheek.
“You okay?” You ask, your hand on his shoulder, lifting his chin to look at his face.
“Please… don’t, don’t touch me for a minute?” He asks and you give an embarrassed laugh understanding his request. You’re not exactly innocent in his torment.
“Of course I’m sorry I…” Your sentence is cut off.
Zemo has you by the back of your arms and pulls you tight against him. “You, not her.”
Bucky sighs dropping his head.
“I’m still confused. Is, this what you wanted?” He asks feigning ignorance though with you naked its clear what Zemo means.
Bucky won’t look.
“Answer me.”
“No, I mean— yes Baron.” He concedes.
You feel Zemo’s laugh along your neck. “You wouldn’t have been fast enough to finish before I found you. Well, maybe you, but not her. Tell me, how quickly can you make her come?”
“What?”
“How quickly?”
You shut your eyes as soon as you realize where this is going.
“I don’t know. I mean she always got there.” Bucky says sounding slightly self conscious.
Zemo smiles. “Two minutes. I can finish her off in just two.”
“Ha!” Bucky doesn’t believe him, who would.
Oh Bucky…
“Tell him it’s true.” Zemo leans towards you.
You nod glancing at them both. “He does this… thing.” You tell Bucky. “He works my spot and my clit at the same time and I come. Fast.” You say simply and totally helpless to it.
“It’s not always the most fun, rarely my first choice; but great when we’re in a hurry.” He shrugs and takes a knee before you even realize that he has. “Open your legs.” He says looking up at you.
Your eyes go wide, surprised to see him down and waiting with Bucky watching. Still, you part your thighs and wisely lay your hands on his shoulders knowing you won’t be able to stay upright without the support.
“This? Right James? This warm, tight, safe place? This is what you wanted?” Zemo asks, teasing Bucky with the way he slides his fingers between your velvet soft folds. You feel him turn his hand and his finger circles your entrance. He sighs and takes hold of your hip to keep you in place.
Two fingers slip inside and you hiss against the stretch, biting your lip as your head lolls to the side. You try to hold in the loudest of your noise but it’s hopeless.
The Baron starts to do his thing and you wonder if you might be able to deny him the pleasure of making you come in front of Bucky again, but just like always you end up gripping his shoulders to keep from falling as he does a perfect come hither with his two fingers as his thumb rubs with the perfect amount of pressure on your throbbing clitoris. He can’t resist and licks your peak for good measure until you hold your breath as he sucks sloppily and until you come on his hand and just as quickly as always. Your wild moaning is nearly feral but you could not care less. It makes you smile to hear him laugh softly so pleased with himself and you and your eyes shut as you pant, catching your breath.
Lowering your head, your eyes only half open, you both look over at Bucky who is glaring at the Baron.
“James.”
“Yes.”
“Stop breaking the rules.”
“Yes Baron.” He says giving in completely.
Zemo smiles and slowly pulls his fingers free from you, raising his hand just enough to show them so wet and sticky and glistening. He kisses your belly and looks up at you. “Go lie down.” He says rubbing your stomach, smoothing his hand over your soft tuft of hair. You’re still floating as you do, happy to go and rest and leave them to it.
“Would you like to come now?” You hear Zemo ask Bucky as he gets up and goes around the chair.
“Please.” Bucky whispers watching you sink down onto the bed on your side.
“I can finish you off just as quickly as I did her.”
“Yes. Please.” He begs through clenched teeth rising up again as if presenting himself to be relieved, the steady rush of blood to his lower half turning his cock a darker shade of desperate as it rises up like a tower ready to fall. “I’m sorry I didn’t listen to you.” He pants “I’m sorry I tried to fuck her. I’m sorry for breaking your rules. And I will do anything, please just… fuck. Please!”
Helmut leans down hushing him, pressing his face close to Bucky’s, grabbing him around the chest as his left hand comes reaching over his stomach promising an end to the day’s long torment.
He grips the soldiers gorgeous, endlessly taunted dick; your natural lubricant replacing the oil to help glide his fingers along.
When Zemo starts to work Bucky you can see through the look on his face that this is all he’s wanted to do for so long and you are reminded that this is as much the Baron’s discipline as it is yours— as it is Bucky’s.
Bucky makes a deep sound that gets your attention. His body flexes and you think he looks like a bomb ready to blow. A sexy, finely muscled, lightly tanned bomb with a look of pained excitement as his legs open and his jaw flexes.
“Are you mine James?” Zemo asks, his lips brushing his ear,
“Yes” He says pitifully raising his hips, thrusting once into the Baron’s hand just as Zemo lets go. A deep frown fixes between Bucky’s brows as he waits until Zemo grabs again and starts to perfectly stroke him.
Bucky’s mouth opens, his eyes fix on the incredibly hypnotic rhythm of Zemo’s hand.
“You’ve always been mine haven’t you?”
“Yes!” Bucky nearly shouts, his brows turned down with the exquisite anguish of the nearing release.
“Say it again,” Zemo demands, his right arm tight around Bucky, his eyes shut relishing in the control and the love, you listen to the wet rhythm as it gets faster.
“Yes.”
“Say it!”
“I’ve always been yours” Bucky moans loudly and glances over at you unable to keep your hand away from your pussy selfishly wanting to come again.
“Once more.” Helmut says opening his eyes. The muscle of his arm is flexed beautifully as he pounds.
Bucky moans so similarly to you that Helmut just smiles. He knows, he understands the hold he has over you both.
“I’m yours” Bucky manages and the Baron focuses his movement as if pulling the orgasm from Bucky’s body willing it to come forward. He jerks his hand up and away…but this time he’s finished the job.
He holds Bucky as the man cries out, his hips rising high this time, his cock pulsing with a tight up and down as he finally —god, finally— gives a high pitched groan with that first explosive release of come that shoots past his stomach and onto his own chest followed by equally satisfying spasms that send milky droplets flying free into the air and across his stomach onto Zemo’s arms; Bucky’s groaning and gasping near tears with the absolute exhaustion and relief of his well deserved climax, his moans and gasps of surprise so raw and unaffected.
By the time he lowers back down to the chair unable to do much more than sit there, limp and panting with his eyes closed, Helmut is holding him, caring nothing for the mess. He seems to love the sight of the pearlescent results of Bucky’s incredible orgasm as much as you do.
Smiling as he strokes Bucky’s hair, kissing his temple, he says with a tone only Helmut Zemo could manage at a moment like this, “You see. When you listen to me, I make it worth every second, every moment of torment. Yes?”
Bucky nods but it’s weak.
Zemo chuckles softly, kisses him again and reaches down easily undoing the ropes.
“Look at you both.” He says trying to sound angry, as if it’s not all his fault. “You can’t come to dinner like this. I’ll run a bath.”
He leaves Bucky and comes to the bed bending over you, his hand so sticky from the combination is heavy on your belly as he kisses your lips. “Hows your ass?” He asks.
“Still on fire.” You say and he winks as he rises.
“Good."
*
“You’re pretty quiet over there.” Bucky says splashing you from across the large tub. You’ve both been in for a while now after Zemo took a quick shower and left you alone letting you know he’d be up waiting at the dinner table.
Roused from your daydream but still not sure you want to talk about why you’re so quiet, you glance over and shrug.
“Whats wrong? You’re not mad about what happened are you?” Bucky asks sliding a little closer. The tub is surprisingly big in an already large bathroom and yet again you wonder how you’ll return to real life when this all ends.
“What happened?” You ask him.
“Getting you in trouble? He really put a shine on your backside.” Bucky says, a smile breaking through any attempt at being serious.
You sit up surprised to hear that’s what he thinks it could be. “Ha! No. Not at all. That was amazing… god” You tip your head back, the image of Bucky, naked and tired to a chair with Zemo holding him and whispering in his ear will be seared into your mind for life. “I didn’t know you could come that much.” You say, slowly looking back down at him,trying not to giggle.
“Neither did I.” He says practically blushing before he grins. “Same goes for you.” He tosses right back.
You laugh and roll your eyes. “Okay well we both know he’s capable of turning us into sex crazed idiots apparently.” You say with a cheeky grin and Bucky laughs shaking his head with a sigh.
“What is it? Some Sokovian spell or something, magic from the old world?” Bucky says with a thick accent wiggling his wet soapy fingers in the air.
Laughing you scrunch your nose. “Nah, that’s all him. Just wait until you’ve been around him long enough to get to the good stuff.”
“The good stuff!” He looks shocked “Well what the hell is all this!”
“This is amazing, but it not… well it’s not him. Theres so much more than sex. Watching tv. Eating dinner in bed. Naps— once he read to me.” You say with a sigh and the room goes silent as you both slip into a day dream laced with Helmuts beautiful voice surrounding you as he reads the classics on a warm summer night…
“You think he sits around daydreaming about us like this?” Bucky asks with a frown. “I worry sometimes.”
“Really?” You ask looking into his big blue eyes. Hundred years old and still so sweet. “Of course he does. Bucky, he wouldn’t have done any of this if he didn’t spend as much time thinking of us as we do him. Don’t be so naive”
He nods looking out the window and you know he’s just out of practice. He probably had a swarm of girls around him back when his life was normal. Maybe even a secret guy. But how long ago had that been. And since he’d been released from the words, his only real time spent with anyone has been with the two of you. For a moment you wonder if that’s fair. He should go out on dates or something, but then again you did try to get him on some apps. He hated them all. Women swiped right like it was their job of course, but he thought it was strange and wanted to meet them the old fashioned way but when he did he could only focus on what he didn’t like and just compared them to you— and Zemo.
“Hey.” You get his attention again. “I mean it, I’m really not upset about anything that happened earlier. Thanks for being such a rule breaker.” You say with a wink.
“No problem” He laughs as if that was his intention. Bucky’s expression softens as he sits back, the water rocking under the bubbles.
Bubbles. Talk about a diva, is anyone is on this big ass boat it’s him. Two adults having a bath drawn from them; why not throw in the bubbles. You roll your eyes ignoring the way your chest gets tight with the feel of being so adored and loving every second of his over the top ways and focus on Bucky who looks stunning in the bath— your heart sinking just a little.
“So what is it?” He asks unaware of your many distractions.
You look back to the window staring up at the sky for a while. “I’m just… sad.” You say giving in to the truth “I mean, I’m thrilled being here. But I’ve had this idea that I could talk you into staying with us. I keep imagining this life with you and Helmut and I know it can’t happen for so many reasons but I’m stubborn and spoiled. I truly hate not getting my way. So I keep thinking, maybe.”
He goes quiet now understanding, and then you feel his hand on your knee under the water. “I know. I’ve thought about it too. Maybe a little too much. Definitely enough that I’ve almost convinced myself it could work, but no. It just wouldn’t.”
You press your lips hesitant to say in case you might offend him but decide to just go for it. “And you’re sure it’s not just that you miss it? Saving the world and everything? I mean, I can see how it would be appealing— from controlled killer to stoic hero.” You tease gently, wiggling your brows up and down until he laughs a little, probably more annoyed than you’d like, and whatever facade you’d put on crumbles. The look of heartbreak turns your brows down, twisting your face with the agony of losing him. He looks surprised to see you so broken about it and finds your hand through the water.
“Hey hey hey.” He pulls but you’re not in the mood to be comforted. Bucky hates when you don’t let him coddle you, but he knows better than to fight it so he simply answers your question. “Yes.Well. No I mean, it’s nice. But honestly, if you really want to know, I could get used to being domesticated.” He shrugs letting go of your hand as he looks towards the shower where Zemo was and you swallow the tears that have been overpowered by your intrigue.
Managing a laugh at his expense you poke his arm on the rim of the tub. “Really? By me or Helmut?” You ask and swear you see him blush.
“You’ve already proven you can turn me into a homebody, and happy to be there, so —Maybe both?” He shrugs and there is such a tone of possibility in his statement that you’re instantly transported into a world in which the three of you are living happily. Maybe in this Mediterranean paradise, you’ve just come home from the market with ingredients for a dinner that Bucky has asked you to pick up and you help him cook while music blasts in your small but bright kitchen and you dance around until the house smells delicious and you set the table, flirting and toying with one another until everything looks beautiful before rushing to sit just as your Baron comes through the door…
Even here and now sitting in the tub with you, Bucky looks like the sweetest house husband glowing a soft gold in the light of the sun. What you wouldn’t give to be his forever. His his and hers, you think and your chin quivers with the threat of happy miserable tears.
Bucky isn’t oblivious to your hurting but he’s trying to keep strong, he can’t give in to you, not this time. “We’ll never know if I stick around.” He says and your little vision fades “I think I’ve got one visit, maybe two in me before someone notices an avenger hanging around their town and his cover is blown. You don’t want that. I don’t want that. I’d never forgive myself."
“I know.” You say and only realize that your head is down when his hand, which is covered in white bubbles reaches to lift your chin.
“Hey, come one. None of that. We’ve only got a little bit of time. I just want to make the most of it. Give me enough good memories to finally forget about whats left of the bad.”
You smile and nod, blowing the bubbles away before they go up your nose. “Fine.” You sigh and look back out the window hugging your knees. “Buck, can I ask you something?”
“Of course.” He says only cringing a little when you call him Buck.
“Do you think you might ever love him?”
Bucky freezes. He looks— odd. Uncomfortable. Exposed? You realize very quickly that he already does, even if he’s not aware of it and decide not to push him
“It’s okay. I was just curious.” You say and try to calm him with your smile “We come from very different worlds. Letting myself love a man like Helmut Zemo took little to no effort for me, for you— I know why it might come as a shock. But I think you’ll find, when you do admit it to yourself and to him, he might just surprise you with how quickly he says it back.”
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musette22 · 3 years
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Hi Minnie! Hope you can help me settle an argument my brother and I are having about EG!Steve. I'd love to hear your thoughts about this with shipping goggles off, looking at it purely in terms of characterization, narrative, and good writing. Better hang on though, it's going to be a long ask! (sorry in advance for spamming you!) 1/7
So my brother and I were watching FatWS and once again got into a debate about whether Steve's last actions were a disservice or in line with his characterization and narrative, given that the Russos confirmed (and therefore it's Word of God/canon, even if it did sound reactionary to the immediate backlash after EG) that Steve created an alternate reality when he went back, and didn't just live in hiding in the past of the OG timeline. 2/7
Because of this, my bro argued that: 1) the total character assassination that is the idea of Steve just sitting back and letting all the shit happen happen is no longer a problem - for all we know, the alternate reality oldman!Steve came from might have become utopic already due to his presence and foresight. He played coy when talking to Sam so we don't know for certain he didn't save Bucky, get rid of Hydra, and enact social reform when he had the chance. 3/7
Likewise, 2) the accusation that Steve would rob Peggy of her husband and children is a non-issue as Steve went back to a time before Peggy and Daniel got together - I argued here that it was still wrong for him to do given that he KNEW for a fact that Peggy lived a happy life, whereas it was a gamble if he could give her the same. My bro shot back when you truly loved someone, you want them to be happy and to have what's best for them. 4/7
So if Steve chose to go back to Peggy, he had to have believed that he could give her the best life. That Steve based that decision purely on his own assessment is pretty in character (e.g. pushing to become a soldier because he thought that was how he could do his part, even though at the time, he'd have just been a danger to himself and other soldiers; not signing the Accords because he believed in his team's judgment in crises above gov't oversight that might be influenced by politics). 5/7
And lastly 3) he might have settled into the past and started to move on, but what was wrong with him choosing to be selfish and going to the past when given a chance? Why was it wrong for him to go back to a time he knew, where he was beloved by both Peggy and the public, and when he could also save Bucky early? In terms of character growth, wouldn't it be fair for him to finally learn he could be a bit selfish and choose happiness, after a lifetime of nearly suicidal selflessness? 6/7
Our debate was based on confirmed canon with shipping put aside. So I put forth the sin of leaving a traumatized Bucky, Sam, and world behind, that Steve's actions were surely the result of a man broken by grief again and again, and that choosing the past was him running away - which, I argued, was a horrible way to end his character arc. But my brother asked me why I thought so, because wasn't this the so-called 'soft epilogue' that Steve deserved, one that was most in line with canon? 7/7
***************
Hey love! Very interesting argument you and your brother are having here… I’m sure he’s a great guy but I have to say that I vehemently disagree with him (as you probably already guessed lol). Soooo many people have done an excellent job at explaining why, shipping aside, Steve’s ending in EG was absolute bollocks, and I’m certain I could never argue this case as well as all of them have. Nevertheless, I’ll do my best to explain why, in my opinion, your brother is wrong :p I’m going to put my reply under the keep reading tag, because it is long.
1.      The Russos and Markus & McFeely (the writers) never managed to agree on whether Steve really did go back to an alternate timeline, and if so, how that would have worked, exactly. When they were asked, after EG had been released, about whether Steve would have just sat back and let everything he knew was happening/going to happen in the decades to come, both to Bucky and to the world at large, they came up with this ‘alternate timeline’ solution, but they kept contradicting each other on the logistics and technicalities of it (like how would old man Steve suddenly be able to jump timelines to come back to give Sam the shield in EG? And how did EG Steve attend Peggy’s funeral, like they also suggested, which would technically have been in a different timeline?). Which makes it pretty clear that this wasn’t something they’d considered beforehand or even all agree on afterwards, and therefore it can’t technically allowed to play a role in judging the rightness of Steve’s ending in EG if we’re looking at it from a ‘the creator’s word is law’ perspective. Moreover, there is nothing to indicate in EG itself that Steve knew he’d be able to create alternate timelines, so that would’ve been a crazy gamble on his part. Also, him ‘playing coy’ in that final scene with Sam really isn’t a convincing indication that he was actually, canonically, talking about anything besides marrying Peggy.
2.      Which bring us to point two: Peggy had literally told Steve she’d lived a happy life with her family, and told him in no uncertain terms to move on. If Steve really loved her, he would have accepted her wishes and allowed her the dignity of her choice (something Peggy herself, in CA:TFA, had told Steve was important to do when you care about someone) to move on from him once she believed him dead. Steve deciding that he would be better for Peggy because he believed was a better man than the person she ended up marrying originally would be the most un-like Steve thing to do, ever. Steve has never once shown that he thinks of himself as the hero or better than other people – he simply wants to do the best he can to help make the world a better place. He would never say “Peggy deserves the best and I believe I am the best, therefore she will have me, regardless of what she thinks or wants.” Steve drinks respect women juice, that’s clear from all of his movies, and deciding the course of her entire life for her, taking away her agency, whether in his own timeline or another, would be utterly disrespectful to Peggy.
3.      As for the next point: of course there’s nothing wrong with Steve being selfish for once – Steve is human, and all humans are selfish sometimes, and that’s okay. But, as Chris Evans already explained multiple times prior to Endgame, Steve had already made selfish decisions in the past, namely when it came to getting Bucky back and keeping him safe. Shipping aside, Bucky was presented in all the Cap movies as Steve’s very best friend, and was even called his ‘soulmate’ (platonically or otherwise) by M&M (the writers). So when, in Civil War, Steve was presented with a choice between duty/what was expected of him by the government versus saving Bucky/keeping Bucky safe, Steve was selfish and chose Bucky. That, canonically, made sense. Peggy being presented as the ultimate love of Steve’s life, who he loved and valued more than anyone or anything else in the world (which is what happened in EG), canonically does not make sense. 
In CA:TWS, Peggy told Steve to move on. When Peggy died, Steve buried her and mourned her, and then not long after, he canonically kissed Peggy’s niece. Then, in Infinity War, Steve saw Bucky turn to dust before his very eyes in the “Blip” (a conscious decision on the writers’/directors’ part to show how Steve once again lost what was most important to him while helplessly standing by) – and the next thing we know, Steve is leading a support group for other people who lost loved ones in the Blip, and starts talking about losing… Peggy? Huh. Also, Steve going back to a time which your brother calls “a time when he was beloved the public” doesn’t add up, either: technically, Steve went back to a time where people loved an idea of him, but also believed him to be dead. So either he would have had to have found a way to convincingly stage his own resurrection (meanwhile possibly leaving the other version to vegetate in the ice..? depending on how this timeline malarkey was supposed to work), or he would have lived his whole life hidden behind some fake persona – which does not sound like Steve at all, does it?
4.      Finally, let’s talk about Bucky some more, because I think we need to to be able to assess the situation properly. I understand that your brother may believe that shippers are often delusional and only see what they want to see etc, but there is ample evidence, canonically, of Bucky being the most important person in Steve’s life – the person he would give up the shield for, the person he would give up his other friendships for, the person he would give up his life for. Peggy may have been a recurring character in character in the three Cap movies, but she was never presented as the principal motivator of his actions, or as the love of Steve’s life. You know who was? Bucky. Sure, that love wasn’t canonically romantic in nature, but there can’t be any doubt that Bucky meant more than anything to Steve. Therefore, Steve choosing to have a ‘soft epilogue’ that entails him spending the rest of his life without Bucky – and, more importantly, Bucky to spend the rest of his life without Steve – contradicts everything we’ve learned about their relationship (platonic or otherwise) in the rest of the movies, does it not? 
Also, the Russos have said something to the effect that Bucky and Steve were now both mentally ‘well enough’ to not ‘need’ each other anymore (because as we all know, that’s exactly how friendships work…), but it’s pretty clear from EG that Steve was still traumatized by everything he’d been through, and going back to the 50s would have meant he would never be able to get proper help with that and in fact could only talk about any of it with Peggy and Peggy alone. Moreover, M&M have literally said in interviews that Bucky wasn’t all that well yet, mentally, and TFAWTS also shows convincingly that Bucky was not actually in a good place when Steve left him. So that would have meant that Steve either did not see this (unlikely, given how close they were) or did not care (unlikely, given how close they were). 
It would have meant that for the first time in all these movies, Steve decided “to hell with Bucky’s needs, I’m gonna just be selfish because I’ve earned it and claim my trophy wife because actually I am the best man for her, despite the fact that she’s already lived a happy life that I will be negating against her wishes, but that’s fine because maybe I’ll be able to create a different timeline, and maybe I’ll be able to save Bucky from all his trauma anyway, but then again maybe not, but that brings me back to my first point of to hell with Bucky’s needs” - which does not make a lot of sense to me, personally. Not to mention that, in exchange for his ‘soft epilogue’, Steve would also leave the world to sort out the post-Blip mess without him, and leave all the other friends he still had left and clearly cared about a lot to boot. I would not call that character growth, I would call that character disintegration. If your brother insists on taking the creator’s word as gospel and that we have to accept that Steve really did do what he did at the end of Endgame, and that wasn’t just a case of bad, lazy writing fuelled by greed, then to make a decision like this, Steve would have been either an asshole in disguise all along, or mentally extremely unstable.
There you have it, my two cents! I hope this helps a little in settling the argument with your brother, anon! Lots of love ❤️
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tomatograter · 4 years
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Could I ask for your thoughts on Rose and her connections to the other kids? I think that Rose is one character that many people just boil down to "goth alcoholic lesbian" and it bugs me a lot, so I would like to see a different and nuanced analysis on her.
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I've gone back and forth in answering this (or rather HOW to answer this) for a long while. I think Rose is one of the most crucial characters for Homestuck as a narrative, and she's incidentally always been one of my favorites. What i mean by this is that explaining rose is hard, in the way that 'summarizing every other HS subplot' is hard. Objectively, I can’t tell you why rose is good, much in the same way i can’t force you to like pineapple on pizza, but i can try to explain why *i* like rose.
So I'll try to start with a statement: Rose is a difficult little girl. She’s not sweet or compliant or naturally inclined to be motherly or comforting or even KIND, broadly speaking. She’s a cynic, a hater, and a proto-intellectual who wants to feel like she has already figured out everything that has to be ‘figured’ about the world. (Spoiler alert, the conclusion is “it sucks. Blow it to bits.”)
The things that upset her the most are the things she doesn’t know or cannot make sense of. Why does her mother act in such erratic ways? Why does she constantly debase herself in shameful displays of negligent rationality and responsibility? Is it all a game to her? Is this how all adults are, messy and unkempt and deranged? (According to Freud, whose’s name is certainly mentioned enough by Fellow Online TruthSeekers Of The Human Psyche to be considered the utmost authority in just about everything there is to know, no questions asked, the response is “i guess?”) What the fuck even happened to her cat, anyway? Anybody got a baseline 101 on mortality? Does anyone know what the fuck is going on, ever? Is humanity fated to an automated cycle of dull incompetence??????
Rose hoards and utilizes even the most esoteric forms of knowledge as her shield, sword, and building blocks against the fog of uncertainty most people describe as ‘reality’. To truly know something is to rob it of its power and make it your own, ensuring you are not only safe, but impervious to any harm it could possibly cause. Her ambition and defiance set her apart even from the other betas, who wanted to follow the rules and invest in teamwork. Where jade is whimsical and vaguely helpful in a informative tutorial pixie-like way, rose’s advice is delivered via sarcastic remarks and looking for cheats by conversing with the devil. She antagonizes the patronizing questline she's been given in favor of ripping SBURB a new one. Rose is firstly concerned with improving herself, and then maybe sort of (kind of, nothing is settled on stone, what happens, happens) pass it onto her own if they REALLY cant figure it out. There’s a sense that she would sacrifice just about anything to granted the ultimate form of knowledge, the appropriate response and middle-finger to anything, and she hungers for it, which proves to be a little self-destructive. 
Except as much as she wants to put up a veneer of detached, individualistic intellectualism, she still cares far too much for the simplest human accomplishments. She cares for her friends. She envies the lives they've led, and they sound so intriguing when compared to her sterile routine. Her pet cat was once her biggest companion and source of comfort, and finding him dead crushes her. She legitimately would've liked to have a good relationship with her mom, which as we all know ends up more or less the same way. (I tend to disagree with most people who treat rose's living situation as 'pretty good/dramaticized', having a guardian who's almost never sober isn't a comedic or easy experience.) Her quest is borne out of insecurity, uncertainty, and stubbornly trying to prove herself right. Because somebody has to be.
Her faults are just as interesting to me as her qualities, for all the 'mean goth lesbian' talk the way she misses her mother and tries to reverse-engineer a connection with her beyond the grave by dabbling with the same poisons is incredibly compelling, and speaks to a side of rose's many people take for granted: she doesn't have all the answers. She's improvising. She's, like, 15 years old and trying so hard to come off as a badass but she can barely contain her wondering babble long enough to show up for an important date in time. Even in her self-sabotage rose is earnest.
This isn't the sort of narrative you usually see applied to women in fiction, or even when it IS applied, it is only to admonish their efforts and promptly slot them into a love-interest shaped hole. (Because yeah, rose being a lesbian and not falling for any of the assumed important guys does matter very much actually.) Even her turn to grimdarkness pulls from tropes reserved to epic gritty brooding male heroes- avenging her family, wrecking anything and everything in her path, Frank Castle Punisher style. I like rose because she's like matilda, if matilda went wretched sick at age 11 and took the first chance she saw to pierce an ogre through the eyes and ride its corpulent cadaver down a waterfall. She's an unrepentant monstress, cloaking herself in mythos that justify the existence of the unknowable and unjustifiable when rationality predictably falls short of truth, and a snooty little know-it-all who wants to create something so raw and important people will have no choice but know her name, and most importantly, she gets away with it. 
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keilemlucent · 4 years
Text
lavender latte: i
(T (for now!))
hawks | takami keigo x reader
chapter 2   ||   chapter 3 ||  chapter 4
ao3
word count: ~3k
You serve Hawks a lavender, oat milk latte. Not only is he hooked on your drinks, but he's also hooked on you as well.
a fluffy multi-chaptered piece i’ll release when i’m feeling it :’^) enjoy y’all. coffee shop au hell
||||||||||||||||||
You and Keigo met each other on the coldest, snowiest day of the year.
The temperature was near glacial. The air stung and bit like hell, wind kicking and spitting powdery snow as it fell in sheets from the grey sky.
The weather, horribly, prevented two of your coworkers from working the morning shift at the tea shop. Half of the trains were shut down across the city in addition to power outages. But, your cheap ass owner forced you to open. Alone. In a blizzard.
You were fairly certain that you wouldn’t be getting many customers.
Opening at the tea shop on a normal day was a hellish amount of work. As you unlocked the door and walked into your humble establishment of employment, you grimaced at the thought of all of the work you were to do.
After disrobing from your thick winter jacket, scarf, and mittens and throwing on your apron, it was time to begin. You made yourself a simple, oat milk latte and then started to get to work setting up for the day. 
It was hardly dawn. 
  Keigo was on early morning patrol. It wasn’t his favorite shift, oh, hardly, but he did enjoy watching the sunrise. And, while his wings were powerful, the snowstorm did force him to fly much lower in the grey haze of the day than he normally would. Stepping out of his apartment around just before 5:30 AM, Keigo almost moaned in anguish at the cold. He was infinitely glad he had worn a thermal bodysuit under his uniform.
His quirk afforded him much in terms of battle prowess, in addition to a few avian mutations. Most notably at that moment was his difficulty conserving heat. As Keigo stood on his balcony, frowning at the can of coffee in his hand, he made the prompt decision to fly to his area of patrol and grab a hot drink. The thought of downing something cold made his stomach turn.
Gracefully, Keigo turned and flew, letting himself be carried across town. The area he was patrolling was relatively quiet, mostly small businesses and lower-middle-class apartments. As he touched down, shivering and sleepy, he padded through the empty streets with his wings folded to his back.
  The wind was wild, wiping between buildings, making snowdrifts that blocked some of the doors of shops nearby. Part of you cursed, shaking your head. You desperately wanted to be warm, curled in bed with your cats, and watching cartoons.
You set up the shop, moving chairs and turning on machines. Though you were a tea shop, you sold more coffee than any sort. On a normal, fully-staffed day, you’d be in the back, crafting tea blends. But, that day was, in fact, a very abnormal day and it was about to get weirder.
  Keigo meandered around the streets, strangely at genuine ease. There were no civilians and very few stores open allowing him to walk freely, albeit coldly. Part of him wondered if he would even find a coffee shop.
But lo and behold, he did. 
Keigo opened the door, a cute bell ringing. The shop was themed warmly with yellow-toned wood counters and furnishings. There was a smattering of local art on the walls and jewel-toned accents. All in all, it was a cozy reprieve from the icy nature of outside. Keigo relished the heat.
It seemed only one person was working, you. 
  When you heard the bell sounding at the entrance of a customer, you piped up from behind the counter, “Just one sec!”
A kind laugh, “Take your time.”
You were struggling to reach a tea blend. It was high on the many shelves behind the counter. You clamored on top of the counter, rising on your knees to try and reach it. Your hands stretched to grip it with an arch of your back. You grinned in victory as you managed to grab it. You pulled back, miscalculating in your pride—
And then you were losing balance.
And then you were falling.
(How fucking cliche).
You would’ve hit the floor if it wasn’t for some unknown force, pushing you back onto the counter, steadying you. The sensation, new, perked you up, causing you to let out a high noise of surprise. You turned, your eyes going wide.
Several beautiful, scarlet feathers caught your fall.
Your eyes flickered up to your patron savior.
  Number two hero, Hawks, smiling at you and giving you a bit of cheshire grin, stifling a laugh.
You slowly descended from the counter, turning to face him at the register, “Well, I really have to say thank you. I nearly ate shit there.”
“All in a day's work,” Hawks winked at you. You beamed easily. Local heroes came and drank at the shop fairly regularly, but never anyone particularly famous, let alone the top ten. Never the incredibly stunning, wind-whipped bachelor hero that was Hawks.
“What can I get for you today?” You asked, going for a notepad.
Hawks eyes scanned the menu behind you. He hummed, pretty, amber eyes settling back on you, “Surprise me.”
Your eyes widened, but you nodded. You couldn’t stop smiling.
“Alright, let me ask a few questions, just to make your drink the best it can.” You told him. “First off, hot or iced?”
“Oh, definitely hot,” Hawks almost wiggled a feathered eyebrow at you and you couldn’t help rolling your eyes. 
“Okay, how much caffeine? Any allergies?” You asked, scribbling an idea down on the notepad. “Milk preference?”
“As much as you can legally supply me with, no preferred milk, and no allergies. Though, I do like things sweet,” Hawks was removing his gloves as he spoke. “Go crazy, give me the best thing you got, angel. Something that gives me the warm and fuzzies.”
Oh, that was a move. 
Hawks was notoriously (in the media) shamelessly flirtatious with fans and other heroes. It was always painted as something that was in good fun, never sexual, and just part of his brand. This was just common knowledge, but god you never expected it to be directed at you with a cute pet name.
  “On it,” You smiled back at him, face hot. You smoothed yourself down before beginning to craft his drink. 
It wasn’t often that you worked the front counter, and there was a good reason for it. Most of the time, you got too into making drinks, customizing them frivolously (often due to your quirk). Though you were skilled, it took a lot of time that people didn’t have for a coffee run.
But, on the day of a momentous snowstorm, you and Hawks had all the time in the world.
  Keigo was a bit stunned by you.  
You were cute, one. 
You were wearing a soft-looking turtleneck sweater, and high-waisted, wide-leg pants. They were fashionable but obviously aged. But it worked. A cute, embroidered apron was tied over you snuggly around your waist. It was adorned with buttons and pins, brightly colored.
 You spoke so frankly to him. You didn’t gawk at him for even a second, even when his feathers propped you up from falling. You blushed at his pet name but didn’t seem any more fazed than a bit of embarrassment. He liked it. It felt normal.
Keigo rested his hands on the counter, watching you flit about behind the counter. 
“I gotta ask, why are you open in this blizzard??” Keigo tilted his head as your gaze flickered to him. You were still smiling, just a bit, even hard at work. 
  You snorted, “Cheap boss who won’t close, and my coworkers are stranded without the trains running. I live close by and work hourly, so I might as well come in, ya’ know?”
Hawks laughed, something warm and full, so juxtaposed to the storm of flurries outside. 
It was odd, talking to the number two fucking hero so casually, but it felt good. There was a sense of awe and idleness, but it dimmed. There were no flashy heroics, just one person wanting a drink and the other making it.
Your quirk activated on its own as you stared at the syrups. Your quirk’s tell was so small and normal, no one ever caught it. A heavy dilation of the eyes was not something most people were tuned into. Yet there you were, submerged in sensation. Touch, sight, smell, taste, even sound, all blending together. They elicited something deeper in you, creating something abstract you could make tangible.
To make a feeling into a physical reality was a gift, but it came with drawbacks of course.
You poured a few syrups into the bottom of the cup, carefully selecting them.
“I can’t imagine how cold it is up in the sky,” You mused to yourself just before steaming some oat milk. 
“Oh, you have no idea, ” Hawks lamented to you with a groan. “I feel like I’m gonna lose a few toes whenever I work in this weather.”
“Just toes? I’d be worried about a whole foot,” You grinned back at him as you poured more things into the cup, stirring every few moments. 
The feeling in your mind was so tangible to you, and you could perfectly translate it to reality. Something warm, to beat away the frost of the world beyond the tea shop. 
You sprinkled the top with a few dashes of cinnamon, setting it on the counter in front of him. 
  Keigo looked down at the drink you made him, raising an eyebrow. He went to take a sip, but you stopped him, “I’d give that a few minutes if you don’t want to burn your tongue, tailfeathers.”
  Hawks nearly fucking squawked as he set down the drink, giving you a look of false anger, “ Tailfeathers? That’s not a kind name to call me. I don’t even have those.”
Keigo huffed, pouting at you. 
  “You call me, a stranger barista, angel, I call you tailfeathers. Easy trade.” You shrugged at him, tapping into the register system. “I’m not charging you until you try it.”
“Don’t tell me you’re going to upcharge if I don’t like it?” Hawks continued to pout, jokingly so, pulling out a wad of bills that was undoubtedly much more than any drink would cost. 
Your eyes widened, leaving you sputtering, “Oh, never— it’s on the house if it bangs as much as I think it will.”
Hawks laughed, out loud, bending back a bit. You watched his pretty red wings shudder and reflect the warm light of the coffee house. Keigo collected himself, over-dramatically straightening himself. 
You watched with anticipation as he took his sip.
  Keigo was a man of poor taste. Sure, dropping an unholy amount of money on frivolities was one of his small pleasures, after so much of the ascetic bullshit that the Commission put him through, it only seemed fair. But, caffeine was a necessity with his fucked up schedule and he’d be damned waiting in a line or making it at home. Canned coffee was saccharine and speedy and that’s all he fucking wanted. 
But, when the first drops of that stupid oat milk latte hit his tongue, Keigo was beyond enamored. 
Yeah, he wanted coffee to feel warm in this storm, but he didn’t expect to feel warm. With just one gulp, he could feel the heat, like the flames of a steady hearth, drift around his body. 
He brought the cup down from his lips, looking at you with awe. 
You had the smuggest grin spread across your face, arms crossed over your chest.
“Thoughts?” God, you were so cheeky. He loved it. You were so subtly bold.
“This,” Keigo took another greedy swig, wiping his mouth on the back of his ungloved hand, “is the best coffee I’ve ever had in my damn life.”
Your smile just got wider. 
“Glad I could meet your tastes, tailfeathers. No charge,” You gave him a cheeky little wink. You swore you saw his face get redder, but you dismissed it a moment later.
“Oh no, nu-uh,” Keigo pushed the bills towards you. “Take it as a tip then. Seriously. How did you make this?”
You stared down at the bills and Hawks’s hand. His hands weren’t particularly large, but they were scarred plenty. Veins and bone were accented by the dryness of his skin. 
You looked back up at him, still not taking the money, “Can you keep a secret? It’s a big one, especially considering you’re a hero.”
Hawks tilted his head, “If you say you used your quirk to mess with this drink, I don’t know if I’m legally able to keep it a secret.”
“Nah, nah. I didn’t ‘mess with your drink’,” You shook your head, nodding down to it. “Do you know what synesthesia is?”
(He did, surely. But he just wanted to listen to you talk more.)
“Enlighten me?” Hawks ask, stooping to rest his elbows on the counter, chin cradled in his hands.
  For being a man who could kill you in a split second, Hawks was remarkably cute. You understood his sex appeal long before he entered the shop. His hair looked unnaturally fluffy, wind-ruffled, and honey blonde. His eyes had a few cute bird-like markings ringing the sweet, amber irises. He had a delicate but defined jaw. 
He raised a sculpted, feathered eyebrow at you. 
(He’d caught you staring).
You cleared your throat, laughing it off easily (though you were mentally kicking yourself), “Synesthesia, broadly, is like senses overlapping in your brain. Like... The common example is seeing colors when you hear a month of the year.”
“Now, what does this have to do with my lovely drink?” Hawks batted his eyelashes at you. You could tell he was definitely flirting with you, but you brushed it off the best you could. 
He’s a hot guy you made coffee for. Happens all the time. 
“Well, you had me a little bit, I did use my quirk, but it doesn’t mess with your drink physically at all. Not even close,” You laugh. “My quirk allows me to conceptualize abstract ideas into tangible ideas.”
“That really makes it sound like you used your quirk to make my drink,” Keigo watched your eyes dilate as he spoke.
You blinked, and they went back to normal.
“No, no. It’s like for your drink,” Both of your eyes looked towards the steaming cup. “I took your request for ‘warm and fuzzies’ to heart.”
Keigo blinked at you. 
Your pupils expanded again, “I figured ‘ you know, this guy has to fly around in the cold all day, right? Probably is freezing and far away from home ’— and there was my inspiration.
“I used my quirk to conceptualize... the idea of being warm and safe into a tangible concept. A nice, easy coffee drink. Four shots of espresso, oat milk, homemade lavender honey syrup, two of my own, specially made tea extracts, and a bit of cinnamon for good measure.”
Hawks blinked at you, “Your quirk gives you the... blueprints, to turn ideas, literal feelings, into reality and these blueprints just work?” 
You nodded and shrugged, “Most of the time. The less I’m focused on it, the more likely it is that the feeling won’t be able to manifest. I just get more exact with my construction with the fewer stimuli.”
“Drawback?” Hawks quirked an eyebrow, already having a good idea as to it.
You gestured lazily to the empty coffee shop, “I get overstimulated easily, quirk activated or not. Makes a lot of shit hard, but I like my quirk. I mean, it’s nothing like having a crazy strong pair of wings, but it services me well.”
“Did you really ‘manifest’ ‘warm and fuzzies’ into a drink, or did you make it a bit deeper than that?” Keigo sipped again, relishing how it warmed him all over once more. The taste that was dancing over his palette seemed a little more complex than what they were saying. 
“To be frank and to have a bit of an ego, yeah, I went for my go-to feeling when making drinks for myself,” You averted your eyes from him. “A good drink should feel like you’re getting hugged from the inside out, you know? Comforted. It’s hard enough to get that tangibly without a quirk. I just try to help where I can.”
  Keigo blinked at you.
You had turned suddenly, shy, eyes anxiously darting and a hand tugging at the sleeve of your sweater. A cute flush was spreading over your cheekbones when you finally looked at him again, “Kinda corny, right?”
Despite the fact that Keigo’s heart was fucking pounding, he shook his head, voice steady and sure, “Nah, I think it’s cool. You’re doing a lot more than just making coffee for folks.”
Your face got even redder as you rubbed the back of your head,
“I usually work in the back, so I don’t tend to make a lot of coffee for people. I make the tea blends that we sell. I don’t always use my quirk, but sometimes I do.”
Keigo watched you nervously pull at your apron, giving him an oddly desperate deadpan, “Please don’t turn me in.”
That made Keigo bust out laughing again. 
You couldn’t help but stare at him in shock, and then join him. You covered your mouth at first, but finally, just let yourself laugh with him. All it seemed like that there was in the world was you, Keigo, the lavender latte, and the snowdrifts outside.
  Hawks’s pager beeped, almost instantly pulling him from his laughing fit. He glanced at it, giving a dull grimace, “Duty calls, it seems.”
“You’d think villains would take snow days?” You told him as he re-gloved his hands. 
“It would really make my job easier,” He chuckled. Hawks pushed the forgotten money on the counter. “That’s all for you, ya hear me? Keep it or I will actually turn you in.”
Oh, you were feeling bold. 
Before Hawks could pull his hand away, you placed your own on his, stopping his movement.
“Only,” You somehow, one-handed, managed to pull a bit of receipt paper from its machine. Still one-handed you grabbed a pen and scribbled onto the paper. You pushed it towards Keigo. “If you take this very conveniently small piece of paper that totally doesn’t have my name and number on it. Just in case you’d like another lavender latte like that.”
  Oh, Keigo was floored.
He had rapid fucking fans. They were feral. He’d had fans drop their entire life stories on him, gush to him, stalk him— one time, a fan dropped to their knees and licked his boots. And he’d certainly received many phone numbers in his day, so many, but never like this. 
This felt a little different.
“Well, I was gonna say, I might need some contact to know when you work next. Just so I can grab one of your lovely drinks,” Hawks winked at you, all smitten.  He walked backwards towards the door, still meeting your eyes
“Feel free to.” You were just as starry-eyed as he was. “I have a lot to show you!”
And with that, Hawks whisked himself out of the door, fast as ever.
And you both simmered, full of intangible feelings. 
981 notes · View notes
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Oh, maybe Catra confusing what's real and what isn't sometimes and not believing that this is real, because she thinks prime is still inside her head, messing with it and creating fake realities?
There were triggers.
It took them awhile to pick out the pattern, unfortunately. And the time in the interim did nothing to endear the princesses to Catra.
Netossa took the blame the first time, when she patted Catra’s head during the celebration party and Catra froze for a moment before whirling and lashing out. She missed, thankfully, her gaze distance and glazed over. She shook it off fast enough, stuttering an apology, but Netossa was easy going enough to apologize for surprising her.
Mermista was less accepting the second time it happened.
No one was really sure of the series of events - Mermista had found Catra and Melog in the hall, and Melog managed to knock Mermista out of the way before Catra struck. They’d pinned Catra down until reality reasserted itself, leaving her pale and shaken. There had been a rather pointed and cruel comment about Adora keeping her pet under control. And Bow had been forced to hold Adora back, lest she accidentally start a war with Salineas.
“What happened?” she asked Catra later, in the safety of their bedroom. Catra hadn’t had much to say in her own defense.
“I don’t know.” She was curled up against the wall, face hidden in her knees. Melog was encircled around her, shielding her from the world. “I felt... I felt like I wasn’t here, like... like this was a dream or something? I don’t know.”
Adora knelt in front of her, keeping her distance, hands up. “It’s okay. You didn’t sleep well last night, right? Maybe you’re just tired.”
She relaxed slightly, letting out a long breath. “Yeah. I guess. Maybe.”
The third time drove the point home that something was really wrong.
“Entrapta, are you sure you’re not going to break the table?” Glimmer asked tiredly, watching Entrapta rewire the war room table to connect it to one of her own machines.
“Absolutely! Ninety-nine-point-nine percent!”
“That’s not-”
“Here we go!”
The pink table flickered for a moment before turning a shade of lime green which lit up the walls in an eerie aura. Catra, who had been resting her head in her arms on the table, immediately shot up, wide-eyed.
“Sorry,” Entrapta said cheerfully. “This is from a hard drive Hordak helped extract from Horde Prime’s ship, it should give us a general idea of where to start with dismantling the rest of his empire and freeing the planets he’s taken over...”
Blood rushed through Catra’s ears, drowning out all external sound.
Little sister...
No. NononononononononononononoNO it couldn’t be, it couldn’t, he was dead-
Did you really think anyone would come for you? You said it yourself - your precious Adora doesn’t care about you. Your life is worthless. You don’t matter to anyone except me.
“No!”
Everyone jumped as Catra screamed, the noise almost immediately followed by her chair falling over as she staggered away from the table. Her back hit the wall and she dropped to her knees, entire body folding in on itself, eyes closed, hands against the back of her neck.
“Catra?” Adora stood, but was immediately blocked by Melog. Even the alien cat was keeping their distance, as if they knew Catra wasn’t in the right stand of mind.
She was back on the ship, listening to the sound of footsteps on metal floors, mechanical sounds whirring overhead, her hair slicked back against her scalp, the chip in the back of her neck-
It’s not real, it’s not real, it’s not real-
What’s not real? Horde Prime taunted her. Me? Or your friends?
“Entrapta, turn it off,” Glimmer snapped. The princess immediately listened, glipping off the switch and turning the room back to its regular color. Adora tried again to approach, but Melog growled, keeping her back.
“What’s wrong with her?” Frosta piped up from behind, almost sounding worried. Even Mermista couldn’t keep the shaken concern out of her expression. This wasn’t anything any of them had expected.
“I don’t...”
Catra had fallen asleep in Adora’s lap. Adora had panicked when she felt her (former?) friend’s grip loosen, but of course she was exhausted. The last few days must have been hell.
Bow and Glimmer set up a room for her, and Adora insisted on carrying her, refusing to let her go until she absolutely had to.
There was no warning before Catra woke, right as Adora was setting her down. Her eyes shot open, pupils immediately shrinking to pinpricks; Adora barely missed being clawed before Catra vaulted off the bed, hitting the floor with a painful thud.
“Catra-!”
“Shut up!” Her voice was surprisingly strong. She curled in on herself, hands clasped over the back of her neck. “What do you want?” The question baffled Adora into silence. “She’s not coming back, I already told you, she won’t, she wouldn’t, she...”
Catra drifted off into a dry sob. Adora tensed, teeth clenching together as realization set in.
Oh.
Adora straightened up, hands held out in surrender. “It’s okay,” she told Melog gently. They made a noise, ears falling against their skull, mane flaring purple. “I get it. Let me talk to her, please.”
Melog considered her for a moment before backing up and settling beside Catra. Adora took a few steps forward and knelt, still giving Catra space. She was whispering to herself, too soft to be fully heard, her claws digging into her neck almost enough to draw blood.
“Hey.” She kept her voice soft, noting the shudder that went through Catra’s body. “Catra, look at me.” She shook her head. “Please?” Another head shake. “This is real, I promise. It’s not a trick.”
“She wouldn’t come back for me.” The broken defeat in Catra’s voice was like a knife in Adora’s heart. She ignored it, forcing her laugh.
“And somehow I’m the dummy here.” Catra’s ears flicked slightly. “Do you really think Horde Prime would just fake his own death to trick you? We both know he’s way too egotistical for that.”
Catra choked out a little laughed, although her body didn’t relax. Adora took a chance, reaching out to rest a hand on Catra’s knee. It didn’t immediately spark an attack, which she took as a good sign.
“He’s not real.”
She’s not real.
“You’re here. You’re safe.”
She would never come back for you.
“I love you.”
She’s lying.
Catra shook, letting out a small sob. “Stop...”
Adora’s fingers tightened on her knee. “Focus on me, Catra. I’m here. I’m real. It’s okay.”
Melog’s pulsing mane slowly faded back to blue as Catra retracted her claws. Adora held her breath, waiting. “How do I know you’re real?” she finally whispered.
“Because I kicked Horde Prime’s ass and I’d do it again if I had a chance?”
One hand slowly slid down to rest over Adora’s. “Promise?”
“I promise.”
Catra unfurled a bit, allowing Adora to drag her into her arms and hug her tight.
They weren’t flashbacks, exactly - more like hallucinations. That was how the healer in Mystacor tried to explain it when Catra talked to her (after nearly three days of Glimmer trying to convince her that it would be good to talk to someone who understood mental trauma in a way that could help). They were things that hadn’t happened, but that Catra was afraid would happen - that she would wake up back on that ship, that Adora had never come to save her, that she was still Horde Prime’s willing little sister.
Melog helped as an active buffer; a third party who hadn’t been present at any point in Catra’s life before Prime, and something her mind couldn’t really make up. Adora learned a few ways to help Catra ground herself. The problem was that anything could be a possible trigger, and the only way they could learn what set Catra was off was by waiting. They figured out color and touch pretty quickly, but there were other things, like certain words or phrases that would put Catra right back on the ship like she had never left it.
“Maybe you should’ve just left me there,” she muttered dejectedly into her pillow one night. Adora immediately abandoned the map she was working on to sit with Catra, gently brushing her hair back.
“The fact that you thought I really would leave you there is a bit insulting, you know,” she joked.
“Sorry, didn’t mean to offend your hero complex.” There was no heat in the words. “What good am I if I can’t even keep reality straight?”
“You can’t judge yourself based on something that you have no control over.” Adora’s fingers paused over the back of her neck, inches from the scar left by the chip (now surrounded by several fresher, lighter scars from various flashbacks or hallucinations).
“Doesn’t make me any less dangerous.”
“The only person you’re a danger to is yourself.” Adora lightly traced one of the newer scars. Catra shivered slightly. “If I tell you I love you and it’s worth it, can you at least believe that I believe that?”
“Of course I believe you believe that. You have a bleeding heart.”
Rude, but fair. Adora lied beside her, pulling her into a hug. “Then believe that I can make my own choices and I don’t need you to protect me from you.”
Catra was still for a long moment before she leaned into the hug, relaxing. “Remember those stupid drawings we did on your bunk?”
“Our marks, you mean?”
“Yeah, something to remember us by when we were ruling the place as adults.” Catra smiled into her shoulder. “Which one was red and which was blue, again?”
“Uh, I was red, obviously.”
“Why obviously? Red isn’t exactly your color, princess.”
It was one of their small ways of grounding Catra. A lot of their memories had conflicting details despite being shared - even things as tiny as which of Octavia’s eyes Catra had scratched out (Adora swore it was the left eye, Catra would die thinking it was the right eye). Horde Prime’s illusions had never been detailed enough to think of Adora’s memories being different - Adora would have just agreed with anything Catra said. Possibly the most unrealistic thing of all.
“You don’t even know what red is.”
"Oh yeah? Did you hit your head hard enough to fix being colorblind at some point?”
“Are you asking me about brain damage? Seriously?”
They never did get around to figuring out who was what color, but it didn’t really matter - Catra had accomplished what she had wanted to do.
This was reality. No matter how much her brain tried to tell her otherwise.
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Prompt #6 - Korra
For: fvckingeetar - hopefully you like this!
Prompt 6 : ’God her smile could light up the world, and her toned body would sweep me off my feet, and her eyes, the window to her soul, which are looking at me, which are glaring at me, which are getting closer?’
Words: 2,262
---
You always had your nose in a book no matter where you went, always escaping the world of reality and entering a new one full of adventure and love, which brought you here today, a hopeless romantic always in search of adventure and your true love. Thats cheesy and you know it, but you couldn’t help it, always falling in love with the brave characters that sought out to help others. You just hoped that someday, you could fall for someone just as brave as the characters in your books. Except, thats the problem. You did. To be exact, the biggest hero of them all, the avatar. Korra. 
Avatar Korra was… unique. An annoying teenager if you ask her mother, but didn’t all parents find teenagers to be annoying? I couldn’t help it though, from the moment she walked, well rode into town on her polar bear dog, Naga to fight off the equalists, she had my heart. God, her smile could light up the world, and her toned body would sweep me off my feet, and her eyes, the window to her soul, which are looking at me, which are glaring at me, which are getting closer? 
I frowned as I watched Korra advance on me, not sure what to do, but hoped I wouldn’t break out in another blush attack which happened all the time around Korra. I was about to question what she was doing when-
“Hey you, enough sitting around and reading, you promised me you were going to help me train!” Korra huffed out as she grabbed my book and tossed it aside.
“HEY! I was reading that!” 
“I know, but you’re supposed to be helping me! Now common, put these gloves on and help me train!” Korra threw the gloves at you, and you pushed your glasses up and put on the gloves. 
“Remind me why you chose me out of all people to help you. I trip over my own feet getting dressed for the morning, what makes you think I can help you train to take the White Lotus down?” You ask as Korra starts to throw some punches at the gloves. While you’d always admire her toned body, you prefer to admire it from a distance, not be on the receiving end of it. 
“Because, everyone else is busy, and with recruiting the air benders, I feel like I haven’t really got a chance to hang out with you lately.” Korra shrugged as she continued to hit a few different swings at your gloves. You kept moving back as she got more intense with her hits, and you were starting to really feel the impact of the hits. Sure you were apart of ‘team avatar’, but more on the logical side of things, and engineering. You weren’t a fighter by far, you admired the art form of technique in how one fights, especially during pro bending tournaments. Thats how you met Korra, when she joined the Fire Ferrets, and you were a big fan, always routing for the underdog. 
You were at the game when the equalizes attacked, and though you’re not a fighter, your mother did teach you everything she knew about chi-blocking and redirecting one’s energy from your opponent back to them. You rarely ever had to use the self defense, but knew it for emergencies, and with your skills, you helped get a lot of people out to safety, including some officers, along with helping the Fire Ferrets get free. Since that day, Bolin would invite you to everything they did as a group, and soon enough, you became apart of team avatar. Granted you still hated fighting, but you could help be the get a way car, or help Asami design some new models of Sato mobiles and other inventions. You were a fire bender, but almost never used your bending unless it was to warm tea. 
Whenever you would get flustered though, you would usually create static in the air or a spark would go off due to your emotions which was heavily influencing your bending. Korra would often tease you of these moments, which was never helpful due to the fact that you began to develop a crush on the avatar. Sure you knew she had mixed feelings about Mako, but you pretended sometimes that she didn’t. But eventually reality would hit you in the face, and you’d have to come out of it. 
“Oh no, are you okay?!” Korra shouting as you went down hard. Korra missed the target, and hit your face, sending you down to the floor as your glasses went flying off your face, and you were laying on the ground groaning. 
“I am so sorry, I was trying a new combo, and miscalculated it!” Korra said as she pulled some water and started to heal your face which was already producing a blacken eye. You weakly pulled your glasses off the ground and rubbed the dirt off and just smiled up at her. Even when she was punching you in the face, you were still in awe by her. Of course you had to ruin the moment though, and felt the static in the air cause Korra’s hair to go up, and a little zap to the back of her neck. 
“OW! Hahaha, you did it again!” Korra teased, as she helped you off the floor and readjusted your glasses, and took the gloves back, resigning for the day. 
“Yeah, yeah, whatever Korra.”
“Seriously though, are you okay, I hit you pretty hard there.” Korra asked examining your face. 
“I’m good.” You say shyly as you stare into her bright blue eyes. She stared back into yours as she looked from your eyes to your lips and back to your eyes, you didn’t know what to do, but felt yourself leaning in slowly…
“Hey guys, come quick, the air benders have been kidnapped!” Mako ran out to the two girls who quickly ran inside with him. 
—-
*skipping all the fighting scenes and Korra gets poisoned, and is trying to recover out in the south pole but is struggling, cue in you, where you come to see Korra and work with her on her progression* 
—-
After getting off the ship and stepping into the deep snow, you trudged through to the cabin where Korra stays at and greet her parents who you’ve previously arranged with to surprise Korra to help her get better. Everyone has missed the young avatar, but not quite like you. Whereas everyone has missed her bubbly personality and energy, you crave her smile, and her jokes. You miss her laugh and energy. You miss how safe she made you feel. You miss everything about her, and though it might be selfish, you had to come see her, you couldn’t go another day, you needed to be near her and help her get better. You needed her to come home to you, even if she ended up with Mako, you needed her home to make you feel better. 
You didn’t even bother with settling in. You went straight to her room and knocked on the door. There was silence, so you knocked a little louder this time, bracing yourself to see what has happened to the young avatar over the past few months. 
After a moment, you couldn’t stop yourself. You opened the door and walked in. Inside Korra was laying in bed staring at the ceiling, but she was awake. She didn’t try to hide that she wasn’t. You weren’t sure what was worse, the fact that she openly ignored you or pretending to be asleep. You pushed those thoughts aside and walked over to her bed and kneeled down. 
“What are you doing here?” Korra asked quietly . 
“I came to check up on you. I miss you.” You say just as quietly , taking in her look. She looked as if she hadn’t gotten a goodnight’s sleep since she left. Which was probably true in her case, granted neither have you. 
“I’m fine. Go home.” Korra said, unmoving. 
“I just got here, I’m not going home.” You respond, brows furrowing. 
“I didn’t ask you to come here. In fact, I said stay away, so go away.” Korra replied. 
“Korra, can’t you see I came to help you. I’m here to make sure you get better.” You reply reaching out. She pulls away and finally looks at you, making eye contact, and though you’ve missed those blue eyes of hers, you regret your word choice instantly. 
“You think I’m not trying that everyday? I’m the avatar. I’m supposed to ensure peace and balance remains in the world, and I can’t even walk.” Korra shouted, pushing you away. “Tenzin and the rest of them all keep telling me to get better like I’m not already trying. It’s my job to ensure the world is peaceful.” She sighs.
“Your purpose is more than just keeping peace between the nations and spirits, Korra.” You sigh out while reaching to put a hand on her shoulder, having it kill you inside watching her struggle so much. 
“Then what is it? All my life my purpose has been to train to keep peace, if thats not it, what is it?” Korra sighed out quietly looking away. You took a moment to contemplate what she said. Before you really had an idea of what you were saying, you got down on your knees and took her hand in yours and turned her head to look at you. 
“You have more than one specific purpose. Yes, ensuring peace amongst all is apart of that, but so is taking care of yourself. So is ensuring you come back to us, your friends, me. Come back for me Korra. I need you. Everyone is focusing on how you need to get better at your own time, but I need you to get better for me too. I miss you, and, and… and I love you Korra. I always have, and seeing you like this is killing me. Please get better for me.” You whispered out staring deeply into her eyes while a single tear slipped down your face.
“You… you love me? Like, more than friends?” Korra asked while searching your eyes trying to connect the puzzle pieces together. 
“Yes, you idiot.” You laughed and looked away, not exactly sure what you thought her response would be, but that wasn’t exactly it. Before you could put too much thought into it, you were suddenly embraced in a hug, and thrown to the floor. Surprised, you looked through the brown lock and into the bright blue eyes above you. 
“YOU LOVE ME!” Korra screamed out while peppering your face with tiny kisses all over, and in that moment, you could’ve died. You’ve never expressed such bliss within, and thats all you could ever ask for, is to see her smile and that happy face of hers once again. You smiled up at her, as the door banged open and Korra’s parents rushed in to the sudden shouting, and once they looked at the two of you, just chuckled and left. 
“You really love me? Why haven’t you said anything before?” Korra asked pulling away and sitting back up giving you space to breathe, even though you didn’t protest her crushing you. You readjusted your glasses and sat next to her, and pulling the blankets over the both of you. 
“Well, yeah. I always have. I wasn’t sure what you were going to say, or how you would react, and you were so busy with the public, I didn’t want to get in the way…” You shrugged while snuggling closer with Korra, because the south pole was freaking cold.
Korra sat in thought for a while, but you didn’t mind, you just missed being close with her, and snuggling up with her, and just enjoying her presence. That’s all you ever wanted, and you never wanted it to end. 
“Okay.” Korra said after awhile. 
“Okay what?” You asked puzzled.
“I’ll do it. I’ll stop pushing you away. I was so focused on getting better, and pushing people away to get there, because I was supposed to be the one supporting everyone. Not getting the support, but its nice, and I have missed all of you guys, and you. I don’t know what my feelings for you are, but I know they’re more intense than whatever I had with Mako.” Korra said while leaning her head on your shoulder. You just smiled slightly to yourself and brushed her forehead with a kiss. 
“That’s all I ever wanted, to be let in. I’m always here.” You say softly as you notice Korra slipped into a sleep against you, and you couldn’t imagine anything more peaceful than this moment with her, and were excited to see where this took the two of you.
—-
Wow, so after 2K words, I did a bit of rambling, but I hope this is something that you were hoping for. I feel like this was a much longer prompt story than anticipated. I’m still working on my writing, and trying to hone in my ADHD into coherent sentences and pace and tie things together, and not ramble as much. Let me know how you liked it!! Thanks for reading!! 
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sor-vette · 3 years
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one, strike!! (index/description)
☜ profiles II
two, down!! ☞
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Naturally what was estimated into an hour quickly grew into three hours and naturally, those three hours involved a decent amount of manhandling and lots of loose fists. All in all, you limped your way into the annual celebration late and with a busted lip and a nicely settling lilac shade on the cusp of the jaw. The celebration was nearing the end. There were no speakers on the stage or even in the front row. The crowd had mingled already long before.
Jin is actually the first who you notice in the crowd. Uncharacteristically he’s sitting alone by one of the side tables of the room. In front of him, there’s a small gathering of empty champagne glasses, even as you’re looking he’s playing with the thin stem of the glass, face completely blank. You sidestep into a larger group of people to avoid any eye contact. Namjoon is of course the next.
He’s standing listening to someone unfamiliar to you speak. He nods along with the conversation but you can see his jaw clenched in a death grip. He’ll need a brace soon, you think dryly. The rhythmical bops on the sides of his cheeks were amusing, yes, but not when directed at you. At the moment where your legs hesitate by the banquet table, there rings a shutter sound of a camera. You try to peek as subtly as possible and upon seeing a mop of dark curls sticking above the lens, you dip towards Namjoon. Anything but that. Anything. Yeah, you’d rather deal with angry Namjoon than any jabs of resentment with V. Namjoon, in fact, does notice you and his veins, in fact, do actually start showing. He’s one split hair away from foaming at the mouth. And yet, and yet-
“Ah, Mr. Reyes and Mr. Kuznetsov, I’d like to meet R.D. It’s the woman I’ve talked to you about earlier in the evening,” earlier when you were supposed to show your ass up. His voice is completely neutral as if you’d showing up late, tousled, and looking like a digested raccoon was part of the plan.
“Sorry for meeting you this late, there was a situation that needed my attention,” even if they’re not placated by the excuse, the polite hmm’s are still given.
“Mr. Kuznetsov had heard how you declined positions in all of the other departments and he was wondering why.” And you once had thought that Jin and Jimin were award-worthy actors... Namjoon doesn’t give off anything, not a single clue. He paraphrases the belated questions so casually as if he didn’t know. As if he didn’t know that the answer was him all along. Sure, there were other… reasons, other circumstances but no matter how the dice was turned, the primary descent into your suicidal career choice was pushed by Namjoon himself.
“I like the freedom of the cleaner department.”
“Freedom?” Mr. Kuznetsov echoes and you politely wait for his interpreter thinking it’d be rude to intrude on his job.
“Freedom?”
“Yes. There are certain characteristics to other departments that require um… putting on airs? Being a cleaner means I don’t have to pretend to be someone I’m not and I’m largely responsible for my own choices.” Namjoon snorts. It is an ugly, mocking sound.
“Furthermore,” you continue, glaring at him “our department is very friendly and honest. We say what we want and don’t rope people in situations that are only beneficial to us.” Namjoon’s jaw makes an audible tick. For a split second, it seems he has simply managed to dislocate it entirely.
“I thought they were also supposed to be punctual.” He snarks through what was supposed to look like an amicable smile. A miserable fail on his part.
“Yes, they are. It’s just not me. Not a postcard material, you see.” If Mr. Reyes and Mr. Kuznetcov pick up on the rapidly increasing animosity, they at least have the working social sense not to remark on it. Both of them thank you for your answers and then stay a little longer to talk to Namjoon again. At that point, you start to zone out of reality and have something alike Ducktales intro loudly playing in your mind.
When they bid their goodbyes almost twenty minutes later, the re-purposed great conference hall is nearly empty. Jin had disappeared without you seeing. And so has V, thank God. Briefly, you try to find someone else familiar but there is none. Finally, the pair leaves, and Namjoon is left openly fuming. He takes those purposeful, long strides and you almost double in two, growling:
“Don’t you even-!” He does not listen and catches your elbow in a death grip, dragging you to the first exit door into those gray nondescript hallways you loathe. You shove him away unceremoniously.
“Do you enjoy creating a mess? Or are you simply incapable of keeping a promise?” His voice is low, monotone, kicking your self-esteem right underneath Earth’s crust. It was hard - to argue with Namjoon. Just…not impossible. Overall it helped to think of it as the world’s snidest debate match.
“I distinctly remember not promising anything due to this very reason.”
“Your reason being?”
“My direct duties as a custodian.” Namjoon actually snarls.
“To the boy?”
“His name is Erik,” you lightly correct and for some reason, he gives a mirthless laugh. As if that’s faintly amusing.
“You’ve never treated your duties seriously.”
“Actually, I have. You just don’t like it if I do something on my own.” It’s a deja vu at this point. You’ve had this conversation, point by point, five years ago.
A beat of silence passes.
Then another one.
“You’re happy now?” Namjoon asks. You suspect largely to make you feel guilty over something not defined.
“Of course. We just had a perfectly pleasant conversation.” You say matter-of-factly. Yes, it is hard to argue with Namjoon but once you learn that his biggest weakness is someone brushing off all of his righteous fury aside and not let it underneath the skin... Well, it is a couple of hundred steps towards mastery on this very vague debate team.
“Clean yourself up.” He bites his last and stomps away. You wait until he disappears up the exit stairs and let out a long sigh, letting your spine relax.
You turn around all too ready to go home and drown inside your mattress but freeze upon seeing Jimin. He stands quite far away, by appearance having just exited the conference hall. There are faint creases in his face and mute worry reflecting in the eyes. No doubt, he heard at least half the conversation. You both stand awkwardly in the silence of the hallway, each rooted in their own spot. He gives a small smile, an attempt at comfort. So very like Jimin. You lightly shrug as if to say - “it is what it is”. To not look him into the eyes, you turn your head to the top of his head. It is pink now. Looks nice. You point to the top of your own head and give a thumbs up, hoping he’d get what you’re trying to gesture. He does. Jimin gives another smile, a touch shyer as he lowers his eyes in silent gratitude at the compliment but the worry doesn’t decrease.
The conversation if it could be called that ends there and after another heavy sigh, he walks back into the hall.
“Life is like a hurricane, here in, Duckberg,” you bop quietly walking down the empty hallway.
***
Namjoon sags into the chair of his office in total darkness as he didn’t bother to turn on the lights. The only faint illumination is provided by the neon lights of the city below. The walk of twenty-five floors has taken all the wind out of him, along with it the anger. Thirty minutes ago he was mumbling it like a mantra in his head. He’d wrangle your neck if you dared to show your face and now he finds the very idea irrational. Jin had said his temper has gotten worse over the course of six years. The unrelenting stress taking a toll, he said. Maybe, maybe it was the stress. But Namjoon begrudgingly had to admit it was you who hit the nail of the problem. He took an issue wherever you or really anyone in his care did things on their own. He was the leader, the face of everything they try to do here. To save the world, that’s what the tag line said. But years after years of trying to save the world and years after years worth of sacrifices piling up, he’d rather start not to save the world but just save someone.
And then you came here, nearly six years ago, forlorn and bent on killing yourself and he lets you into this hellhole. Let's you stay so you could find meaning in the vague promises of being an underground hero, a vigilante. And then when it becomes peaceful when life seems to be good, you take a dive. A dive that just keeps ongoing. And it’s not that Namjoon doesn’t trust you. You’ve matured in heaps and bounds and reached a notable level of professionalism within the cleaner department. But the world is another thing. A shelter sometimes can be confining but it is ultimately safe. Isn’t safety better than running around jumping from one risky decision to another for the sake of “living adventurous life”?
Namjoon lets his head drop into the palms of his hands. Lately, this is all he’s been doing. Getting angry and then feeling like a complete villain. A pulse begins to form behind his eyes. The telltale sign of an incoming migraine.
God, he just wants to sleep.
***
“Get out,” you murmur half-heartedly, closing the doors to your small apartment. Pop music blasts inside the apartment with Erik lazily enjoying cherry candy sticks on the top of your bed.
“Oh, you’re home.”
“And you’re here. See how upset that makes me?” Erik stared at your stilled expression.
“Devastating,” he murmurs, “did your get your ass kicked? For being late?”
“Well, as long as never show my face there ever again and die on this very spot, no, I’ve handled it quite well.” He points at you with the red object, voice insinuating a captivating intrigue -
“I’m sorry for tonight but I promise tomorrow you’ll have reparations.”
- when it was just plain annoying.
“Instead of thousand sorry’s, I’d like to hear at least once you ask for my permission.”
“You’d say no.”
“I like saying no. It lowers your enthusiasm.”
Erik grumbles something indecipherable. A person busts in through the doors along with the hearty clanging of two bottles smacking against each other.
“What is he doing here?” Irina throws a disapproving look towards the bed.
“No idea.”
“Get out.”
“No, but -”
“Get lost,” you echo Irina.
“Okey-dokey.” And with obnoxious curtsy accompanied with “ladies!” Erik is gone without another whine. You sigh heavily, absent-mindedly poking at the small tower of empty coffee mugs sitting in the sink. There has been no time during the week. You’ve been far too busy spending your free time in alteration between watching old cartoons and staring at a wall.
Irina places her coat and shoes next to her, frowning at the door.
“Why do you even like this kid?” You give a simple shrug. Maybe deep down you know the answer, maybe you don’t but largely you don’t think it matters. Erik was your trainee and that was the end of that. Well, that was how much you were willing to share with the outer world.
“He thinks differently.”
“Isn’t it just the fact that he wears red eyeshadow?” You still for a moment, looking at the paper bags Irina places on your kitchen table.
“Omelas?”
“Yeah.” She puts down the two faded tourist mugs from inside the small kitchen cupboard. I love Vienna and Someone in Paris misses you respectively. You look at the mugs almost apprehensively as if their appearance was somehow offensive but say nothing. They were just mugs after all. Nothing more.
Irina pours the champagne and pops open the white takeout boxes, pushing one in your direction.
“Snagged this from the anniversary party.” She proudly proclaimed, “they had really big banquet tables.”
“Yeah, I saw.” You take a sip of the champagne wincing at the taste. The label of 2004 Philipponnat Clos des Goisses Brut promised its tasters lively energy and tastes of lemon peel, pear, hazelnuts, and mint. What was on your tongue tasted like pure acid. No better than the cheapest energy drink found in the shadiest small stores peppered across the town.
“What are you thinking?”
“The name is obnoxiously long.” Irina huffs while dutifully stuffing her mouth full of chicken.
“No, I meant -” she takes a breath, gulping down on the champagne. For a second you almost worry she’ll end up hacking herself to death at this rate of consumption.
“Did our CEO invite you?”
“Yes.”
“And something happened?”
“Yes.”
“You want to talk about it?”
“No.” She falls silent. After a moment, she unexpectedly reaches across the table and pushes a bite of her rice into your mouth.
“Let’s never be sad over anyone, okay.” You push the rice on the one side of your cheek to push through a flirtatious -
“Only over you.”
Irina gives a wry smile.
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aros001 · 3 years
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First time read through light novel vol. 18. Random thoughts.
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I somewhat suspect the author was hungry while writing this volume.
Also, wow, I knew Kizuna was short but the prior artworks never gave me the full idea of how short. She
is only chest-high compared to Naofumi and Glass (I suppose that could make Glass happy, though; ease of access for Kizuna and whatnot).
Given that, outside of the natural gluttons like Filo, S’yne, and the killer whale sisters, the only person on Naofumi's side with the "Eat food for EXP" matter is Itsuki, I think this is him falling dangerously close to thinking only in terms of game mechanics instead of reality, much like the other three heroes had been early on. Theoretically, yes, if you can gain levels and strength just by eating, why wouldn't you do a lot of it? But he's almost outright ignoring the physical discomfort and pain it's causing his allies and seeing only the numbers. Not to mention that he himself doesn't appear to be eating nearly as much, as he's focus on the cooking.
That said, it is cute that this is the first time in her life Filo is starting to feel full.
Chapter One: Sloth
OH SHI-! Oh, wait. Wrong franchise. We're good. I did not want to have to imagine Kizuna biting her fingers off (Kizuna: "My brain trembles!!!).
If Kizuna is indeed suffering under the curse of Sloth, I'm curious what triggered that specific sin for her. We only have the four heroes of Raphtalia's world to go off of but each sin applied to that specific hero for a reason. Naofumi: Wrath because of his hatred of what Witch and Trash put him through. Ren: Greed because he wanted more EXP, levels, and loot; a toxic extreme of his solo-adventuring. Itsuki: Pride because he believed only in his view of justice. And Motoyasu: lust and envy because of his obsession with Filo and being kept away from her. Kizuna's obsession with fishing, even when there's other important matters that need to be dealt with, I suppose could be considered lazy and thus lead to sloth as its extreme, but it feels a little bit like a stretch.
As he did so, the books from a nearby shelf whirled up into the air, forming . . . a dinosaur . . . perhaps. No, a dragon. The monster’s name was “Magical Tome Dragon.” Now things were really getting a bit crazy. A dragon created from books! Was this some kind of joke?
I want a Yu-Gi-Oh card of that.
“Don’t tell me, Glass is like the Raphtalia of this world? Could we really get that lucky?”
I mean, that's what the fandom likes to joke when it comes to her and Kizuna.
Breaking the sloth curse through Kizuna's love of fishing was about what I expected. Not complaining, of course. Again though, I'm just wonder what about her coincides with Sloth. She prefers talking it out and making allies as opposed to fighting but I wouldn't exactly call that lazy or slothful either.
Kizuna had a lot of folks like this among her allies—people who had started out as enemies but then became allies. If I fought someone as an enemy, there was generally no coming back—there were exceptions, like Sadeena and Shildina, so it was probably better not to generalize.
Glass and L'Arc are literally standing right next to Naofumi as he thinks this and Motoyasu, Ren, and Itsuki all tried to murder him at one point or another. S'yne was part of the gladiator fights too, now that I think about it, and while they never fought he and Trash were definitely enemies for a while. This dude turns more enemies into friends than freakin' Naruto. Being kind of oblivious is part of Naofumi's character but I suppose this could be seen as an interesting look as to how exactly he considers someone an enemy. If they fought him for reasons he eventually came to understand and sympathize with, then he perhaps doesn't consider them as ever having been a "true" enemy.
Aww, Glass is jealous of Tsugumi being close to Kizuna. And unlike Raphtalia with Naofumi, Kizuna doesn't have any kind of tragedy that keeps her opposed to relationship and would require Glass to be patient. I suppose Glass could simply be afraid of hurting their friendship by proposing romance or even that Kizuna doesn't swing that way. And this is from Naofumi's perspective, so Glass being gay could be completely off the mark. Still, it'd be nice to get a solid landing one way or another. Even Eclair unknowingly rejecting Ren at least give solid confirmation that he's into her and why they're not together.
“What! I’m the Hunting Hero! I don’t handle the cooking part!” Kizuna complained.
“And I’m the Shield Hero!” I retorted. Not the Stewpot Hero! If anyone called me that, I would kill them with cookery!
And technically, you're not even that right now. Not with that mirror on your arm. The mirror is cool and all but I am looking forward to Naofumi eventually getting his shield back. He just feels incomplete without it.
“Almost feeding time!” one of them said. Others proceeded to chime in.
“Yes . . . the time we’ve all been waiting for.”
“The moment we live for, basically!”
“Even if I only get to eat one mouthful . . . that is the fuel that will keep me alive!”
“I’ll never eat anything but his cooking ever again!”
“I think the schweiz is the best! It has to be!”
“No! The stietz!”
“Hey! No fighting! We’ve been warned about fighting!”
Did they stumble across a food cult?
“It isn’t bad,” Filo said. “It just isn’t as nice as yours, Master.”
“Well, okay . . .” I replied.
“All of the heroes have cooked in the village, Mr. Naofumi, but Filo and everyone else all feel the same way,” Raphtalia told me.
Filo also grew up with Naofumi's cooking since birth, so while he's already a good cook you get the added taste of home for her. I've said it before but out of everyone I consider Filo to be the most like Naofumi's daughter.
“Then you wish to settle the bill,” she replied. I thought it was free. As my suspicions intensified, the girl spread both of her hands and continued. “How was the food at Seya’s restaurant? It was so delicious, wasn’t it? If you wish to become a member, please leave all of your assets or hand over anything that can be turned into money. If you leave some personal items as collateral, you can have some time to go and fetch some offerings.”
Yep, that's a cult alright.
“Master’s food!” Filo said.
“They’ll get a surprise when they taste what you’re cooking, kiddo,” L’Arc said.
“Indeed. Your victory is assured, if that’s the best they can do,” Glass agreed. I was still concerned about how aggressive they were being. Were they hopped up on endorphins or something? They weren’t acting in character at all.
My first thought was that the OOC behavior was some side effect Naofumi didn't realize came with the Mirror weapon's power-up method, but then why wouldn't Raphtalia or Kizuna be effected when they have been eating the food too? Then I thought maybe they were more used to eating Naofumi's food in general and would have a tolerance to any addictive effects, but then why is Filo still effected?
“That’s the best dish Seya’s restaurant has to offer! Seya’s curry bag! And it’s Fifth Floor too!” one of the MCs shouted. I barely stopped myself from tipping over onto the ground. He really was just reheating a premade curry in a bag! So he was allowed to heat and serve already finished dishes? I mean, that might give me some ideas myself . . .
“The flavors that are normally lost in reheating have been sealed in the bag using proprietary technology! Now you get the maximized flavor from the moment you open the bag! This truly is the ultimate culinary technique! Everyone, watch this kitchen miracle closely as it unfolds before your astounded eyes!” The MCs continued their diatribe, but it just made it harder for me to keep a straight face. It was all a matter of perspective. Capturing the flavor in a bag was certainly a worse approach than making it on the spot.
“Naofumi . . . am I imagining things? It looks to me like he’s just adding or warming up instant ingredients using hot water,” Kizuna said.
So, like most other antagonists in this series lately, Seya is just an arrogant, entitled fraud high on his own stolen power. Why am I not surprised? Though he is giving me a bit of a Kazuma from Konosuba vibe with how he managed to figure out how to recreate items the old heroes would have talked about from Japan. It's odd to say he doesn't have nearly the same level of charisma as Kazuma give...well...it's Kazuma and he's deliberately written to be a massive scumbag.
I do like with his magic powers and awesome cape, Naofumi is basically the little muddy boy meeting a superhero, one who will save the day through cooking.
As for Kizuna . . . I handed her some of the fish we had brought in and had her cut it up. She’d finished with the poisonous fish already. Her life as a fishing fool was paying off now. She knew her way around a fish. The blood had been skillfully drained, and overall, she was a step ahead when it came to gutting and cleaning.
...You think the Hunting Tool can turn into something like the Wunder Boner
?
I explained pointedly, looking at Seya, Trash III, and the other MC. Trash III responded by flipping me off. I could taunt with the best of them, and I mouthed some swear words back.
I mean, one of my favorite scenes in Isekai Quartet was Naofumi and Shalltear sassing each other, so I can agree with that.
“Pollution?” Kizuna asked, looking puzzled.
“You didn’t notice that?” I replied. “Well, just watch.” She wasn’t the brightest bulb, that was for sure.
“Hmmm, I think I need to go wash up,” the rotund noble said. “I’ll be right back.” The judges proceeded to take turns visiting the washroom. Once they had all returned, it was time to eat Seya’s food.
“Huh?” Kizuna, L’Arc, and Therese were looking puzzled. The other diners around us too. I guess there was cause for a little suspicion.
...Did Naofumi give them laxatives?
“Ah!” Kizuna finally cottoned on. “So that’s why you used so many medicinal herbs in your dishes!”
“Exactly. The reason they all wanted to go to the washroom after eating was to expel the toxins. I also used other herbs to bolster the lethargic feeling that would bring on,” I explained.
He gave the judges f**king laxatives! That's hilarious! I get the actual explanation he gives is more complicated than that, relating to purifying and digestion and getting them to finally take notice of the toxins in Seya's food now that they're free from its hold, but it's funny to think that's basically what he did. He won a cooking competition through dishes that encouraged the judges to take a sh*t (or a p*ss, I suppose).
“Hey . . . you’ve been reading too many cooking manga. It’s an illusion that delicious and good things will be evaluated highly. What you need is popularity and demand,” I said. Of course, it had to taste good, but putting the emphasis on that as a bare requirement was also a problem. If you were planning on selling food in a restaurant, of course it had to taste good. Customers came because of other elements, because of popularity. If Seya’s restaurant collapsed here, it would cause trouble for all the judges. That was why I’d created an escape for them. In order to realize the future that boy wanted.
While we don't see Naofumi selling his wares so much anymore because he has far less of a need to, it is nice we do still get that cynical and merchant side of him. All that time didn't just go to waste and it's still a key part of his character.
“What, then? What do you want?” Seya asked.
“There’s someone behind all of this, correct? Someone pulling the strings. If you tell us all about that, we’ll let you go. Hey, I have an idea. Write it down on this piece of paper here. I want a record of this.” I said and passed a piece of paper to him. Seya’s expression immediately brightened.
“That’s all you want? Fine, I can—” But the rest of that sentence vanished into an awful grunt. The moment Seya tried to write a single word, his head simply crumpled in on itself. He managed a brief scream, and then his entire melon exploded. I didn’t want to traumatize my allies, so I quickly threw up a cage and blocked out the grisly scene. Then I gave a sigh.
Well...that was kind of f**ked up for Naofumi to do. Don't get me wrong, after what they had to do to get Takt to be willing to confess, this is much less horrific. But Naofumi did basically just give Seya false hope and then trick him into executing himself. I get why he did it and how dangerous the vanguards are, but it is interesting to think that while ROTSH isn't the darkest of the light novel series I've been reading, Naofumi, save for Ainz Ooal Gown, is definitely the most morally grey of the protagonists compared to Kazuma, Subaru, and Goblin Slayer.
“No matter how delicious the food is, if you eat the same thing every time, you’ll start to get sick of it. Once you get sick of it, you won’t overeat simply because you won’t want to. I’ve been applying that concept to my food,”
That is better than what I was thinking with Naofumi getting too into the game mechanics. And boy do I feel for his friends. It's the same thing that killed me off of soda for a few years. Obviously it's worse to starve than be overstuffed but it's still not a pleasant experience.
We were talking about the primary reason why Kizuna was summoned here in the first place. To put it simply, the idea was to revive the Demon Dragon.
YYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!
And they Tanya'd him too; reborn as an infant of the opposite gender. So does that make Kizuna or Naofumi Being X?
“Seriously . . . it brings dragon tears to my dragon eyes to see you, the great Shield Hero who defeated me, now reduced to this.” The Demon Dragon placed her front paws against her head and muttered sadly to herself.
“I hope you aren’t looking for sympathy,” I said harshly.
“Just think about it for a moment. The same bunch who shouted about defeating me and saving the world are now back, having screwed everything up, relying on me—their sworn enemy—to save them! Take a look around. Does this world look like it’s at peace to you? Well?” the dragon said, really coming for me now. What was worse, I didn’t really have a reply. This world was still plagued by humans fighting each other and had been ravaged by the vanguards of the waves. Everything the dragon had said so far had been so on the money that Kizuna and Glass probably didn’t have any response either. “Can you see how this might feel like something from your own past? Having been chased as a criminal, and then having to clean up after those very weaklings who were chasing you after they had been beaten down by the waves and people from another world?” That punch really landed hard. I wanted to call it a low blow, but she was basically providing a stunningly succinct summary of my life in these other worlds.
Seriously though, after Kyo, Takt, and the various other vanguards, it is so refreshing to have a villain who speaks with some dignity and can actually make a decent point or two, rather than "I'm strong so I can do whatever I want! Losers!" In my vol. 16 random thoughts I compared Takt to All For One from My Hero Academia and I still feel the same way. The two are not that much different goal-wise. They wanted the world and had the power to make it theirs, thus their actions. It is an immature goal when you think about it but AFO did not act anywhere near as immature as Takt and it made him feel so much more intimating. He would sometimes mock his enemy but when he did they were deep cuts that he knew would get under the skin of someone he truly hated, like All Might, rather than just throwing out insults and acting like a brat. And the Demon Dragon is the same (the High Priest too, now that I remember him, even if I don't talk about him as much). I liked Glass as an antagonist because she was intimidating, spoke only as much as she needed to, and was very powerful compared to the protagonists at that time, getting Naofumi to fear facing her again and giving her weight to the story and for the audience. Finding out later her motivations gave her some depth and added grey to the situation. The Demon Dragon is not nearly as sympathetic, but he still works for a lot of the reasons she did. There's presence to him, er, her. It's not a brat who needs to be knocked off their high horse but a genuine threat.
And being able to work with the heroes weirdly makes that even better. The Demon Dragon calls a 100 year truce, not because she's on the side of good, but because she wants there to still be a world around for her to take over. She's completely open about her goal, which ironically makes it easier to trust her.
“That should do for now,” the dragon said. “Hmmm, and this is a female body. Excellent. Shield Hero, under the condition that you will ultimately mate with me, I shall provide even greater cooperation.” So that was how long it took for things to take a crazy turn.
Still a little weird that she wants to f**k Naofumi though. And when the anime gets to this part there is almost definitely going to be a fanfic or doujin. Actually, now that I think about it, there are going to be creators getting some mileage out of when the Demon Dragon tried to take Naofumi over earlier in the series.
“Can’t you make do with Kizuna? She’s one of the four holies from this world. You’ll just have to overcome the gender barrier,” I said.
“Why me?!” Kizuna exclaimed.
“What are you planning on doing to Kizuna?” Now Glass turned a hostile gaze on me too.
Ahh, Naofumi's such a d*ck, I love it. Also, now that's two rivals in one book for Glass. She's almost caught up with Raphtalia.
It would have suited us better if the enemy was a bunch of morons. It was annoying that life never worked out quite so easily. We had no idea how bad it was going to get with the waves, so we had to plan our moves carefully and move to prevent this “fusion of the worlds,” whatever that meant.
Wouldn't that be a heck of a comeback to my bitching about the villains? The ones behind the vanguards have been sending out their idiots first, the ones arrogant and drunk off their power, to soften up the heroes first and cause a bunch of damage but that they know will ultimately just get killed. Takt and the others getting offered up as sacrificial lambs basically because those like S'yne's sister don't like them either.
“I’m starting to feel sorry for Naofumi,” Kizuna agreed.
“He probably thinks you two are in the ‘harem,’” I told them.
“I really don’t like that,” Glass responded. “No, I don’t. I don’t like that at all.” I wasn’t sure why she said it three times, but I didn’t like it either. Just for the record.
“Naofumi is a friend and a comrade, but we’re not like that!” Kizuna retorted. I wondered if she really understood the situation. She was the type who needed things to be said directly to her face.
“A shame we don’t have Fohl here. Even L’Arc would have worked,” I said. Just a few guys mixed in might have broken the group up a bit and prevented it from looking like a harem.
“Naofumi . . . even if we did have some guys, it would probably just give them some different ideas. Like . . . boys love?” Kizuna said. It sounded like, whatever the composition of the party, they would presume a lewd relationship with me at the center.
You know, you never hear about this kind of thing with Ren and Itsuki. Motoyasu went out of his way to have a harem and he still doesn't get it thrown at him as much as Naofumi does. Maybe it's one of those "He protest too much" kind of mindsets, where the more Naofumi denies it the more people think it's true.
“You got lucky. If a wave had occurred with the world of our illustrious leader, we were planning on shattering you. That’s the problem with this system; that’s the only way to get the reward for destroying a world,” the sister explained. I’d heard this talk about rewards for destroying worlds before, I vaguely recalled. I had no idea where that reward came from.
So there's a third world mixed up in all this. Obviously there already was the implication of multiple universes with S'yne and such but now there's a big spotlight on somewhere besides Raphtalia and Kizuna's worlds, where the big bad supposedly lives.
“That’s pretty much what I was expecting. Shield Hero, let me tell you something interesting,” the Demon Dragon began. Then she looked at the Artificial Behemoth’s chest again. “That part there houses a corrupted holy weapon from this world, which has artificially turned the monster into one of the four holy heroes and has allowed it all the power-up methods. It’s basically the monster version of a holy hero.”
I'm somewhat suspecting it's the Blunt Force Holy Weapon, given how easily that beast is smashing through barriers.
The soul that Raphtalia had pulled from the vanguard of the waves was not much like the body it had come from. Instead, it was a gloomy, Japanese-looking guy who was probably in his thirties.
...
“The vanguards of the waves are people who have been reborn or transferred over here after being selected by the one who assumes the name of God. They are given all sorts of abilities, such as the power to steal holy weapons or seven star weapons. They come into these worlds and start causing chaos,” I explained.
“Reborn? You mean like having spare bodies, like Kyo?” Raphtalia asked.
“No, something else. Just their souls were led to this world from Japan, and then they were reborn here as someone from this world. With their memories of the past,” I said. For example, they are people who died in unfortunate accidents—people like Ren, Itsuki, and Motoyasu. This “god” would whisper to them that they had died an untimely death and offer to reincarnate them in any world they liked. They were already dead and so had no reason to reject such an offer. If they did, the “god” probably claimed to be taken with their resolve and promised to give them additional cheat powers, basically forcing them to accept. In some cases, maybe they were just forced to be reborn, no matter what they felt. I’d read books like that, loads of them. Now that they knew being summoned to another world was actually a thing, why not getting reborn or transferred over?
So I was right about Takt being some OC f**kboy! They're all OCs! They're people from Japan who died and now are getting to live out their sh*tty power fantasy fanfiction as their equally sh*tty original character! As a source of useful but disposable minions, that's actually kind of brilliant. We saw how bad Motoyasu, Ren, and Itsuki had been at the beginning (with Naofumi himself potentially on that path as well before he was betrayed) and they were chosen by weapons that actually have the world's best interest at heart. Take those same people and have a malevolent entity constantly feeding their egos and pushing them to do terrible things because "it's their right to do so" and "they're the real heroes" and you've got an near endless source of wrenches to throw into the works of those trying to stop you.
Of course, now I just have this image in my head that the World Eater is Aqua from Konosuba. Which would actually be kind of amazing, not gonna lie. A godly being reincarnating otakus from Japan into a new fantasy-based world for a singular purpose and giving them special powers and tools in exchange.
“What if . . . and just hear me out . . . what if this one who assumes the name of a god is somehow responsible for my game knowledge?” Itsuki quietly suggested. That sounded possible to me now. Even if being summoned was the correct process, having some prior knowledge would change your actions once you arrived.
Before, when the Shield Spirit had explained to Naofumi that he was a first pick choice and the other three heroes were their weapons' third picks, I'd theorized as to why and how the final selection ended up. Assuming the weapons were telling the truth about being able to grant any wish once the waves were over, it could be assumed they have some power over reality even in the four's home universe. So I'd theorized the weapons set up a window to snag their picks, with the shield getting Naofumi and the other weapons, by sheer unfortunance, had their picks keep missing the window and thus they became more desperate, thus why their third picks had to die in order to reincarnate because the weapons couldn't leave things to chance anymore.
Now, with the new speculation and info, we can assume the World Eater has some influence over other universes too, including the heroes' original ones. So two new theories come to mind.
The first, and one I find most likely, is that the World Eater is causing video games that are similar to the worlds impacted by the waves to appear in the original worlds of the heroes. In theory, the butterfly effect could cause a chain of events that'd lead to such games existing, so it's not like the World Eater is just dropping them into each reality. It would just need to nudge things in the right direction. If video game knowledge is actually detrimental to the heroes, then that leaves less choices for the Holy Weapons (at least in regards to what their ideal candidates would be) and opens up more choices for the World Eater, since it wants arrogant and know-it-alls like that for vanguards.
The second, which could still work with the first, is that the World Eater is aware of humans the Holy Weapons have their eyes on and is actively sabotaging them. A weapon has a first choice, so the World Eater throws the game or other things in their path to turn them into a less desirable option, possibly even vanguard material.
After all my comments about the recent antagonists, S'yne's sister is starting to grow on me. She's filling a similar role as Witch; manipulating and using people before ultimately tossing them aside. But like the Demon Dragon and High Priest, there is more of an air of dignity about her than with Witch. With the exception of her sister, she's not really talking down and belittling anyone to try and promote her own strength. Like Glass she feels like someone who is genuinely powerful and doesn't need to prove it. How she's using the enemies of the week is curious and perhaps even a little scary because it does feel like she's testing and experimenting and these losses are not really a loss for her. And there's the added mystery Sadeena threw in over what she really wants. Whether bad guy with a bigger agenda or a secret good guy, she's more enjoyable to read about, as opposed to the vanguards where the biggest enjoyment they offer is watching them get taken down, and even that's not much with all the whining and tantrums they have after they're beaten. She's different from Witch and Kyo. She's not completely high off her own power and doesn't refuse to recognize her enemies' strength. Her casually teleporting away for a bit when she realized the battle was turning in the heroes' favor gave a ton to her character.
I'm just looking forward to when she gets a name other than S'yne's sister or Moron Woman. I appreciate Naofumi's completely lack of caring for learning the names of people who don't deserve it, but if she's going to be a serious antagonist or secret ally, a name would help.
Original Reddit post: https://www.reddit.com/r/shieldbro/comments/kdwai7/first_time_read_through_light_novel_vol_18_random/
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jenospeach · 4 years
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wildflowers for you
𝒔𝒖𝒎𝒎𝒂𝒓𝒚: y/n has feelings for lee jeno, the kind hufflepuff who captures everyone’ hearts with his eyes and his smile. little does she know, her feelings aren’t one-sided.
𝒑𝒂𝒊𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈: Hufflepuff!Lee Jeno x Reader
𝒈𝒆𝒏𝒓𝒆: fluff, hogwarts au
𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒅𝒄𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒕: 2.5k
𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔: none
𝒂𝒖𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒓’𝒔 𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒆: the world of harry potter holds a special place in my heart so hearing what morals JK Rowling supports is beyond disappointing. she goes against her heroes’ own values and with such a narrow-minded view on gender and trans/trans women rights, I can see how she wrote the character of Voldemort so well. I don’t want hogwarts au fics to have a direct link with not supporting trans women rights but stay what they initially were, an escape from reality. Nonetheless, if this fic stirs anger within you, kindly let me know and I’ll take it down. Trans women are women.
p.s.: this is my first fic, feedback is welcomed!
Hufflepuff!Jeno is the sweetheart who sits across from you in Herbology. By what seems like a mighty amount of luck, you’ve always sat across from him ever since your first year. You aren't complaining, though. Jeno greeting you before every class is the best gift someone could ask for.
It might have been those soft locks of his that shimmer like honey under the sun’s rays. Or that famous smile that many Hogwarts students gush about in the hallways outside of the class. The one that reaches his cheeks, turning his eyes into "moon crescents", like had said a Ravenclaw last week. It might as well have been the time the twinkle in Jeno's eyes caught your eye. When he was admiring the flowers in front him, the pink and white hues of the wildflowers popping against the tone of his skin. You couldn't help but linger your gaze on him. At least until he looked past the flowers and locked his gaze with yours. It came as a surprise when, instead of mocking you or ignoring you, he softened up and greeted you for the first time. It might have been that. Or, it might have been the innumerable times he’s left you speechless with his talents and kindness. Whatever it was, you’ve found yourself fallen in love with Jeno.
With the sun reaching its peak and the small gusts of wind cooling the warm air, today was one of the softest summer days. It would be a lie if you said your smile wasn’t due to the certainty that you’d be seeing Jeno today. Of course, with spring turning into summer and the bright flowers blossoming at last, filling the air with what seemed like the definition of love, your smile couldn't help but stay.
Once sat at what became your regular spot over the years, you set your books down and greeted the few classmates that were already in class. You look up to notice the foggy windowpanes letting the sunrays through, turning the greens of the plants into vibrant tones. A shuffle and snicker snap you out of your observation, forcing you to take in the presence next to you.
"What are you daydreaming about now y/n?" your dorm roommate asks you, her tone implying something you'd rather not admit.
"Daydreaming about how noisy that nose of yours is," you roll your eyes at her arms sneaking around your own. "Your allergies acting up again?"
With a sniffle she answers, "Yeaah, are you gonna make me that potion you promised? I don't want what happened last year to happen again..."
You easily remember last year how her allergies had gotten the best of her during this class. Her loud sneezes becoming a constant background noise and eventually annoying the entirety of the classroom. By high demand, you had to escort her to the nursery. Why they still haven't made a potion for allergies remains a mystery to the both of you. Considering the neighbouring hills and land are filled with a variety of wildflowers, the making of a potion should be easy.
"Of course I'm making you your potion, silly. I want to save myself from the embarrassment of last year. I just have to pick up the insane number of flowers you’re allergic to after class, but I think I should be done by tonight.” You pat her head that’s nuzzling onto your shoulder.
“Okay, I’ll try to survive until then.” Your friend trails off while closing her eyes. You smile at her adorableness and tuck the few strands of hair falling onto her face behind her ear.
As much joy your friend’s presence brings you, you can’t help your thoughts being brought to Jeno. Class is starting soon yet he still isn’t here. And it’s not like him to skip a class, he always shows up. As if on cue, Professor Sprouts walks through the door and claps her hands. The sound is muffled due to her mud stained mittens but it’s enough to snap you out of your thoughts.
“To your seats!”
Packing up your things after class is a slow process when your mind is elsewhere, wondering endlessly about where Jeno could have possibly been. Mind too busy running with thoughts, you don’t notice the Hufflepuff shuffling on his two feet next to you.
“Hey Y/n?”
Your head snaps up and you see one of the Beaters of the Hufflepuff team looking at you nervously, his eyes occasionally darting to the entrance of the class.
“Yes, can I help you?” You straighten yourself out and put down your assignment papers on the wooden table in front of you.
He smiles brightly and pulls out some familiar papers, extending his arm to give it to you. “Would you mind giving this to Jeno? I’ve got practice in a few minutes and can’t afford being late again” You barely have time to take the papers from him before he’s grabbing his quidditch bag and chucking it over his shoulder. “Thanks a lot y/n, I owe you one!” he says as he jogs to exit the door.
“Um. Yeah. You’re welcome...” you say to the now empty classroom.
With a handful of papers, you make your way to the school’s gardens and carefully inspect which plants your and Jeno’s assignments are going to be needing. Sadly, each assignment was different meaning none of your needed ingredients are going to be the same as Jeno’s. Nonetheless, you grab some scissors and begin the meticulous process of cutting each plants’ stems. With minutes passing by with ease, your doubled-number of jars fill up quickly. After your last jar is labelled with the correct plant, you leave the garden to go to the wildflowers field. Your friend’s allergy is pretty general, any kind of pollen can set her off. So, with the same scissors as earlier, you pick pairs of as many kinds as you can, eventually creating a bouquet of all sorts of colors. Standing up, thick bouquet in one arm, your eyes pick up a familiar hue of pink and white. Those were the flowers Jeno was admiring on that day. You squat down once more, picking up five of the flowers and adding them to your bouquet.
Back in the school’s hallways, you figured you’d check out the Hufflepuff common room to see if Jeno might be there. Readjusting your bouquet, which weighted a lot more than you expected and cramped up your arms with each step you took, you walked to the Grand Staircase and damn did that bouquet really become a problem now. You were able to make it up halfway up until the petals tickled your nose and your arms begged for a rest. So, you stop and readjust yourself as you hear someone’s steps echoing, indicating they were coming down. You shuffle to the side of the stairs, allowing whoever seemed in a rush to pass by without a worry but the steps stopped in front of you.
“Do you need any help with those?”
Jeno. Although you’re frozen in place, you don’t feel cold. Quite the opposite your cheeks heat up and your heart beats against your chest. You spare a glance at the flowers closer to you, hoping they aren’t moving in rhythm with your heartbeat.
You know there’s no chance it isn’t him, but your head thinks it’s still playing trick with itself. “...Jeno?” You ask, trying to peek over the bundle of flowers.
You can’t see it but Jeno jumps a little at the sound of your voice. His eyes widen and a smile quickly creeps up onto his lips. He reaches over the top of the bouquet and delicately pushes the higher flowers to the side. Your gazes lock again. Butterflies burst in your chest while his cheeks redden. Jeno doesn’t really remember how to breathe, as silly as it sounds. That doesn’t stop him from smiling.
“I wasn’t expecting to bump into you today.” he breaks the long silence that had settled between the two of you.
“I’m sorry?” you ask, lowering your flowers. Daze broken by not quite understanding what he meant by that.
“I mean I didn’t go to class because I didn’t want to bump into you.” Shit. Jeno realizes how badly that came out the second it leaves his mouth and he sees your eyebrows furrow together. He panics, the look on your face, sadness and disappointment written all over it, makes him scramble to form a coherent explanation.
“I mean! Um... I didn’t go to class because I didn’t want you- I mean the class, to get sick!” his hands come up and you see the embarrassment in his eyes. “I caught a small cold because I was out last night...”
“Oh...” That’s a much nicer reason than what’d you’d begun to think of. Thankfully he didn’t start hating you all of a sudden. “Oh!” you exclaim as you remember his papers that were in your bag. “I have your assignment with me! Here, follow me.” you say as you walk to the nearby hallway, searching through your bag as best as possible with your cramping arms and the bouquet being balancing with one arm.
Jeno’s laugh from behind stops you in your tracks and as you turn around, you’re faced with your bag being lifted off your shoulders and dropped onto his own. His kindness is too much, your chest tightening and fingertips twitching by the urge to reach up to his red cheeks and stroking them and telling him how much you-
“Y/n? Are you coming?”
Shit, shit. You really need to stop falling into a daze whenever you stare at Jeno. It’s hard not to though, especially if his eyes are looking at you so intensely that it lights up sparks in the pit of your stomach. The tiny explosions his gaze sets off in you have become addictive and you can only hope that he looks at you more often.
“Ye-Yes, I’m coming...”
You follow him to the stony hallway and place your bouquet of flowers on the ground at your feet. As troublesome it’ll be to pick up the dozens of them, you need to grab those papers from your bag.
“Um,” you inch a step closer to Jeno and reach for the papers inside your bag. “Your assignment is in my bag.”
You decide not to look up at him, knowing how easily you’ll get lost in his eyes if you do. Feeling his own eyes on you while you search through your bag isn’t any better, however. It burns through you and you’re forced to gulp down the emotions you feel and fear are about to spill at any moment by the little distance between you and Jeno.
With the papers signed Lee Jeno in hand, you mindfully take a step back, avoiding the flowers sprawled on the floor point. You breathe in deeply, never realizing how little air you were taking in for the past few minutes, and squat down to pick up your flowers.
“Was that all?”
You don’t miss the hint of playfulness in his voice, easily imagining the prettiest of grins on his lips. You know that the papers aren’t the only thing that you want to give to him. A confession having been bottled inside you for so long is what you really want to give him but the fear of rejection and looking like a complete fool in front of him, someone you’ve admired for years, is way too big. You think today is going to be like any other time you’ve had to push down your feelings but that thought soon dies out when you see the pink and white laying on the cobbled floor. You put down the flowers you’d previously picked up and take the five you specifically picked for Jeno earlier today.
Standing up with a very unstable courage, your only hope being those flowers that you’re now gripping onto. Blinking up at Jeno, your mind hurriedly goes through all the moments you’ve shared with him, moments that drove you mad because of how much your chest and head would warm up and buzz. Moments you’ve told yourself it was impossible that they meant anything more. The snickers from his friends whenever you were nearby didn’t meant anything nor did his nervous laughter when they’d shove him towards you.
“No, I-I picked these for you.” Jeno’s eyes gleam once they land on the flowers that you’re holding out to him. His mind takes him back to the same day you’ve kept rethinking about. The day he saw what he thought were the prettiest flowers, colors popping next to each other. Twiddling the stems of the flowers around, that’s when he noticed you. The colors of the flowers seemed like nothing compared to the color of your hair and your eyes. That same sun that made his hair shimmer like honey made yours gleam.  
Your voice rings in his ears, “I thought of you when I saw these in the garden, and I couldn’t help myself. I figured I could give them to you, if you’d like to of course.”
The same as now, your flowers aren’t what Jeno is focusing on. He looks in your eyes for signs that would mean anything opposite of what he’s leading himself to believe but he sees none, only anticipation of his answer and your red dusted cheeks. You were beautiful, there was no lie in that. But Jeno’s heart leapt at the consideration and care behind your every action. Always looking out for others and putting their comfort over you own, he wanted to be the one to give you back the same kind of love you’ve been giving.
“And they remind me of you.” Jeno says as he takes the flowers from you, his other hand replacing the flowers you were previously holding. “Y/n, tell me I’m not getting ahead of myself…”
The two of you are as close as you’ve ever been now. Hands still intertwined; you gently grip his robe. To stabilize you or to bring him closer, you don’t know. But you don’t feel like letting go.
“You’re not.”
“Then can I... can I kiss you?”
“Please.”
The two of you lean in at the same time, meeting each other halfway. The smell of Jeno — faint soap and cotton — mixes with the smell of the wildflowers, with the tingle at the tip of your lips and with the burn of your interlaced hand, overwhelming you amazingly. The sparks inside of you explode like never before and you smile into the kiss. Jeno feels your lips perch up and he can’t resist smiling with you, his hand squeezing yours as to let you know this is real. He pulls away slowly, his chest rising and falling a bit quicker than before, but he softly places his forehead against yours. You calm him down and make him nervous at the same time, he can’t help but let out a hearted laugh, one that you feel rumbling in your own chest.
“You most definitely have my germs now.”
“For you, I don’t mind.”
157 notes · View notes
itsclydebitches · 4 years
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Welcome back, everyone! Starting here in Chapter Six these recaps are doing double duty with my latest attempt at completing National Novel Writing Month. Granted, this isn’t a novel and yes, I technically started this project well before November, but there’s no way I’d manage 50,000 words of fiction in 2020, so I’m hoping to hit that with these recaps instead. You all get semi-frequent updates and I may get to finally say I completed this challenge! That’s a win-win as far as I’m concerned.
Quick reminder: new teams, CFVY was separated, everything is awful. There, done. Seventy-five pages in we’ve come back to Velvet’s point of view as she and the other students are carted off in airbuses. She’s experiencing the “same shock and dismay” that she saw on Yatsuhashi’s face before they were separated, thus I’d like to re-emphasize last chapter’s argument that though shaking up the teams isn’t inherently a bad idea, doing it in this way while your students are recovering from/still involved in a war is… not so great for their mental health. Yeah, yeah, Remnant is a hard place and these kids experience traumatic events on the weekly, but still. There’s a fine line between preparing students for that kind of life and simply traumatizing them further, because this is a kind of trauma when the teams so heavily rely on one another - fill every aspect of one another’s lives: friend, colleague, family, teacher, student, leader, follower, romantic partner - and you’re now uprooting them with no warning. Whether or not new teams actually happen, the students think they are and that’s messing with their heads. Basically they’re just:
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This problem is highlighted when we get confirmation of what I stated last time: the teams aren’t merely colleagues turned friends, but family. These fighters have got all their emotional eggs in one basket. Velvet goes so far as to imply that she loves her team more than her parents, with the logic being that they (her parents) “never talked to each other anymore.” So… if Coco and Yatsuhashi stopped talking would that undermine your love for each of them as individuals? I get what the overall takeaway is - divorce is a nasty business and can leave lasting scars on kids caught in the middle, to say nothing of the fact that, as a young adult, Velvet is poised to start creating a family by choice, not blood - but it’s still an odd way to phrase the issue. Here we have another instance of me picking up on implications due to RWBY, the franchise’s, overall themes. When you’ve got a story so thoroughly touting a teens vs. adults mentality, having Velvet mentally reject her parents for her team reads differently than it otherwise would. Chock that onto the pile that already includes things like, ‘Ruby denies that Qrow ever helped her’ and ‘Yang is no longer a part of grieving for Summer’ and ‘Weiss seems to have forgotten all that Klein did for her.’ There’s a lot of uncomfortable details attached to our heroes and how they see the adults in their lives, parents included.
Velvet doesn’t get to worry for long though. A much happier voice sounds across the airbus and she spots Sun, classically hanging from his tail. Instead of hearing more about her fears we segue into - you guessed it - Sun bashing. The first thought to pop into her head is that Sun “wasn’t with the rest of his team, but knowing Sun, that might have been his decision.”
...Velvet, you just tried desperately to stay with your own team and were (somehow) swept away by the apparently overwhelming crowed (still ridiculous imo). But if you didn’t manage this, what makes you think Sun had a chance? Why is his separation suddenly a potential choice when yours was presented as nothing of the sort? That is some real insistence on thinking the worst of him. I dragged Sun for abandoning his team in Volume 4 because that was abandonment. It was a choice worthy of criticism. This? This was outside of his control and Velvet knows it.
Sun saw her, smiled, and waved. Velvet looked away.
Nice, Velvet.
He comes over anyway and (kindly!) asks if she’s okay. Velvet says no, specifically because “Yatsu and I were separated.” Here we have another example of how close the partners get even within each team. Blake and Yang are inseparable. Ruby talks to Weiss more than her sister (and the concept of her talking to Blake in any meaningfully way is hilarious at this point). Now, despite being separated from her entire team - everyone is in the same awful boat - Velvet frames the situation as just being separated from Yatsuhashi. Later she repeats, “Well, I still want to try to find Yatsu.” So would it be a disappointment to find Fox or Coco instead? It’s especially weird because in the main show we see Velvet and Coco interacting the most. I actually had to look up who Velvet’s partner was because I just assumed our two girls were a duo. Apparently not. I’m not really into the CFVY side of the fandom, but I imagine there’s a substantial ship community for these two based solely on how Velvet embraces RWBY partnerships in this book, outside of the always popular Velvet/Coco, of course.
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That’s admittedly a ship I can get behind. 
After Velvet unloads all her worries “Sun stared ahead, like he couldn’t quite manage to feel bad.” Attention, readers, this is an important lesson coming up! In fandom spaces I often see people analyzing novels (and other print media/visual media with narration) without taking into consideration the perspective. Unless we’ve got an omniscient perspective we need to take into account that our narrator might, simply put, be wrong (and even then, omniscient unreliable narrators are a popular choice). Often I see readers taking a characters’ thoughts - and words - at face value, which is understandable given that we’re meant to emotionally connect with them, but we have to keep in mind that this is their interpretation of events. We see the story through their eyes, how they perceive the world, but their perception of the world may not be accurate or, at the very least, is open to further interpretation. Sometimes this is used in an obvious, plot-driven manner - there’s a surprise twist for the reader, made possible because our protagonist was likewise kept in the dark - but it applies to our reading of more casual interactions too. This is a good example. Just because Velvet says Sun looks “like he couldn’t quite manage to feel bad” doesn’t mean that’s actually how Sun feels. As we’ve just re-established, Velvet is inclined to think the worst of Sun, or at least consider the worst as a distinct possibility. So if we’re asking the question, “Is Velvet’s perspective accurate to reality here?” weighing her previous assumptions against actions like Sun smiling, waving, and asking how she’s doing, AKA caring about her situation… I’d say no, it’s likely not.
At least she doesn’t outright accuse him of anything. Given that he’s not privy to these insulting thoughts, Sun chatters on about the test. He thinks it “isn’t a bad idea” because, as established, a lot of students lost teammates and are having trouble settling into Shade while still trying to live the life they had at Beacon. Changing the teams could be a “chance to really commit to our new school and our training, and learn from one another in a new way.” That’s what I think!
“Right… Or maybe some of us burned bridges with our team and might be looking for an easy way to avoid fixing those relationships.”
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Velvet what the actual fuck. Can our cast NOT be assholes for five minutes??
Sun goes red at the accusation and calls her out on being harsh. “Tough love” Velvet calls it. Okay, no. Tough love is reserved for people you’re actually friends with and is meant to have them face a harsh reality they might be avoiding. Sun is avoiding an overt apology with his team, but we (and Velvet) have been given no indication that his thoughts on the test are a smokescreen to hide ulterior motives, which is what she’s talking about here. Sun clearly wants to make up with his team, he’s just struggling to accept what needs to be done to do that. Tough love would have been Velvet encouraging Sun to use this separation to reflect on what his team means to him and then, regardless of whether they end up back together, apologizing for how he unintentionally hurt them. Not… this. Plus, again, Velvet hasn’t exactly been friendly lately. She has little ground for dishing out “tough love.” You need established “love” before the “tough” part.  
In addition, she’s not listening to what Sun’s saying. “If they want us prepared for an attack, breaking up teams sounds counterproductive.” When did Sun mention anything about an attack? That’s your assumption of what’s going down based on the illegal investigation you’ve been assisting with. Sun just said that changing the teams would provide some of them with a much needed clean slate, which is true. Just because that’s not what Velvet needs doesn’t mean it’s not useful for others. As she eventually acknowledges, they can get too comfortable in the roles they’ve been playing.
We get her line about wanting to find Yatsuhashi followed by, “Sun, you do whatever you want. That’s what you’re good at.” Velvet seriously? Then minutes later she’s hoping Sun sticks close to her if he can. Real talk: everyone deserves better than this. ‘Friends’ who constantly act like your presence is a burden, insult you whenever they get the chance, insist such insults are for your benefit (it’s just tough love), but then turn around and play nice when you have something they want... those aren’t friends. Note that Velvet is - both privately and overtly - mean to Sun while he’s just existing in the airbus, going through the same horrible test as her, trying to be nice, and holding an otherwise civil conversation. While trapped on the bus with nowhere to go, Sun is a nuisance despite his best efforts. When the floor suddenly opens up and Velvet is terrified of falling and surviving on her own though, then his presence is desirable. That’s not friendship and in another story I’d praise the author(s) for writing a compelling move from shaky acquaintances to a strong bond… but I’m honestly not sure that the relationship (any of them, really) will improve. Far as I can gather, Myers thinks this is friendship.
So Velvet accuses Sun of always and forever hurting others in his pursuit of doing what pleases him (after checking in on Velvet… literally minutes ago…) which is right around when Scarlet decides to make himself known. He agrees with Sun’s belief that this test will be harder than they assume: “I think you’re right… For a change.” Everything comes with a caveat. Apparently Scarlet has been listening in the whole time, but somehow manages to turn that into an insult as well with “I’ve been standing five feet away. Maybe I’m ready for a new team, too.” Wait, is the implication that Scarlet is further annoyed because Sun didn’t notice him? Do you all have ANY idea how many times a friend has stood right next to me and I didn’t notice them because I was caught up in something like work, a show… a conversation? I’m oblivious af. I get that Sun has things to make up for but at the very least these characters could keep their criticisms to what he’s actually done wrong, not crazy reaches like, ‘Sun probably abandoned his team when everyone was separated’ or ‘Sun was busy talking to Velvet and didn’t notice me eavesdropping, so I guess I don’t mean much to him, huh.’ I’m constantly torn between the presumed realism of this writing - people are unfair in their criticisms, teens do hold unsubstantiated grudges - and acknowledging that Myers seems to have felt confident writing (1) personality and just gave it to everyone. Velvet privately becomes as critical as Coco, who is as vocal as Fox, who agrees with Yatsuhashi, who echoes Sun’s team, and Sun himself often throws that attitude right back. Round and round we go. 
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As one might imagine, the three begin theorizing about what the test itself will be like. Usually Shade sets up initiation just like this. Students are transported in windowless airbuses, dumped in the desert, and told to find their way home. I’m interested in the bit about how teams are made up not only based on arrival, but also “the manner in which [the students] survived.” It definitely lends support to the assumption I’ve always had that the teams can really be random. At least not entirely. There’s strategy on the part of the instructors, thinking through aspects like, ‘Well, these two students used their wits in this manner so they’d pair together nicely.’ Or the reverse, ‘Put together the strategist with the student in love with blunt force, let them balance each other out.’ I certainly don’t think that Ozpin formed teams based solely on who ran into each other first. Not only do we have agency on the part of the students (Weiss leaves Ruby, then Jaune, then goes back to Ruby), as well as the fact that two sets of partners had to be paired together someway, but Ozpin was also carefully watching their whole performance. If the only thing that mattered was getting back to Beacon with a chess piece, why bother examining their choices? Shade appears to employ a similar setup of careful decisions portrayed as randomness, which would make sense given that Ozpin set up these schools. Though all the headmasters may not realize it (is Theodore a part of the inner circle?), or perhaps don’t agree with his methods overall, Ozpin’s influence is undeniably evident in each institution we’ve seen. 
The only difference between normal initiation and this test seems to be that the students have to find a gold figurine this time around. Though as our trio points out, there’s likely to be other differences as well, otherwise the original Shade students would have a pretty significant advantage. 
During all this Velvet remanences about Beacon’s initiation and we learn that Ozpin does, apparently, use the whole ‘Throw you into the woods where you’ll find some relic’ setup each year, as Velvet remembers being “thrown into the air” during hers. She also hits on another concern that hadn’t crossed my mind until now: what if a team includes a new student alongside the “more vocal in harassing recruits from Beacon and Haven?” It might do the Shade students some good to get to know the newcomers, but it’s not the newcomers’ responsibility to teach them some basic respect and kindness. 
During all this Rumpole, via a screen, has been explaining how the test will go down. Her little info session concludes with her telling them to “Prepare for drop-off… See you back home soon.” I really like that she used the term “home” here. It says something about how she views the school and her students’ place in it, despite the tough attitude and tougher culture of Vacuo.
Turns out, when Rumpole said drop-off she meant that literally. The floor opens up and we get a mix of some students panicking while others just happily jump out. 
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Yeet. 
Like I said, Ozpin’s influence. 
I didn’t understand the panic initially - aren’t landing strategies a basic part of huntsmen training, something everyone (except Jaune) is expected to know coming into a school? Isn’t it at least partway through the year when everyone, even firsties, has had practice at this? - until I remembered Rumpole’s comment about how she hoped everyone remembered to bring their weapons this morning.
…that’s one hell of a lesson. Let’s break this down for a second. Yes, everyone at Shade is expected to carry their weapons at all times, but the meeting that started all this was early in the morning and, far as I can tell, entirely unexpected. ‘Supposed to’ is not the same thing as ‘will,’ especially when one is dealing with college-equivalent students who are still figuring expectations out. It’s not outside the realm of possibility that someone did leave their weapon behind. So now what? These buses are thousands of feet in the air, dropping students randomly as they jump/fall. If a student did need help how in the world would a professor assist them? Do they just expect other students to help like Pyrrha did for Jaune? It’s possible given that in a moment Octavia will help Velvet despite seeming to dislike her... but that’s not something I’d want to bank on. Whether a student forgot their weapon or has a weapon unsuited to a landing strategy, they’re going to die from this fall. Yeah, yeah, the test is supposed to be deadly, but what’s there to learn then? You’re dead! The lesson ‘Don’t forget your weapon’ or ‘Find a weapon more suited to landing strategies’ will never stick unless there are contingency plans in place to ensure that students survive their first mistakes. 
It just all seems kind of flimsy, like everything works out because the plot says it must, not because I believe this in-world setup is geared towards keeping students alive and teaching them how to survive this world. (The reverse of the story conveniently not killing civilians off during a major grimm attack.) If landing strategies are so crucial to a huntsmen’s work - and we see them a lot - why are students allowed to have weapons like Yatsuhashi’s Fulcrum that, far as I can see, provide you with no way of slowing your descent? What if you don’t have a suitable semblance? Or it hasn’t been unlocked yet? What if your weapon would work, theoretically, but you haven’t taken any pictures of other suitable weapons lately (Velvet)? What if you never figure out that there are parachutes on the ship? Unless the instructors have a secret way of saving someone from getting splattered, this seems like a test rife with deadly mistakes, not just encounters. Why not teach your students to carry mini high-tech parachutes on their belts, with weapons and semblances as backups? Incorporate Atlas tech into standard schooling, then give us huntsmen who suddenly have it taken away with the embargo, resulting in a lot of problems. I mean, the students are legit scared in this scene, Velvet included. Having them face deadly grimm is one thing, but why test the odds with a thousand foot plunge when there’s absolutely no reason to? Far as I can see, the schooling isn’t built around ensuring they survive a fall like this - nothing like weapon requirements, or carrying additional gear if you semblance is something like Ren’s - which means making the fall a part of the test itself is... not great. 
Which, to be clear, is the fault of the author(s) and how much thought (or not) they’ve put into their fictional school, not the fictional school’s fault because it’s, you know, fictional. Basically, the world building in this series kind of drives me nuts, in case you haven’t noticed lol. 
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Velvet does find the parachutes, oh so conveniently, and at least has the decency to give one to Sun. Also yeah, kudos for thinking to search for them in the first place. I do like the ‘survival is the only thing that counts’ theme. Cheating, lying, and the like is great when it’s used because the odds are already stacked against you. We get her agreement to try and stick close because remember, there’s nothing like a dangerous situation to remind you to be decent towards someone else. As Velvet magnanimously thinks, “Being with Sun would be better than being alone.”
Okay. Low bar, but okay. 
So they fall and we get to hear a fair bit about Vacuo’s history based on what Velvet remembers about each landmark from history class. Honestly, I’m impressed at her recall. I wouldn’t be able to dredge up class notes while falling through the air. We get an abandoned city previously hidden by sand and the somewhat confusing sentence, “These were all that was left of the underground mines, the Drylands, the site of the old Paradise Oasis, long since dried up following Dust mining and the Great War.” Are these three separate places among the rock-less area pockmarked with holes? Or is this a single area of underground mines, called the Drylands (for some reason?), that includes the contrasting place called Paradise Oasis? I’m not sure. The takeaway though is that Velvet hopes Coco isn’t heading to that ambiguously named place because she’s incredibly claustrophobic.
What I find the most informative in all this is the description of the quarries as “physical manifestations of the wounds that still ran deep in the people of Vacuo.” The overall issue of outsiders coming into Vacuo, draining it of its resources, and then taking it back to their own kingdoms (while leaving their trash behind) is the sort of theme significant to our own lives and worthy of examination in fiction… Not saying that RWBY necessarily handles this theme well - especially given the messy conflation of that generational trauma and the awful treatment of any ‘outsider’ who wanders into the kingdom - but I do appreciate when I can see the series trying. Even if it fails, effort is (to an extent) still worth acknowledgement.
What I’m less inclined to praise is the strange follow up of “maybe that was why Rumpole was sending students there.” …what does this mean? Velvet just told us the quarries are the “wounds” of Vacuo, so are they being sent there because they’re dangerous? Because huntsmen will somehow fix this?? Neither of these make sense but I literally don’t know what point Myers is trying to make… which happens a lot. Again, there’s a whole lot of wise-sounding statements in this novel that, at the end of the day, mean very little - if anything at all.
Velvet eventually lands, nearly getting pulled into one of the openings when she can’t get out of her parachute. She’s saved at the last moment by Octavia Ember, a member of Team NDGO. You know, “One of the people she least wanted to run into.” We all knew the moment Velvet worried about running into one of the crueler members of Shade that it would happen.
Their conversation is filled with heartfelt gratitude and riveting greetings:
“Thanks?” Velvet said.
“Whatever.” Octavia sheathed her blade and started walking away. That was more like it.
What is wrong with all of these people? My kingdom for a kind, enthusiastic, non-team exchange!
You know the ‘enemies forced to work together’ conflict couldn’t end there though (a trope I normally love and would likely love here except having Octavia be another stereotypical mean girl was the least innovative choice possible). She and Velvet end up heading towards the same quarry, simply because there’s nothing else for miles around. Velvet displays some quick thinking when she explains that the instructors likely hid the relics in there to ensure they weren’t forever hidden under the sand. Velvet, unlike Yatsuhashi, has also realized that there’s more to the test than just their fighting skills. They’ll be graded on everything, “Including how we treat each other.” I’m always appreciative of characters who use their brains as much as their brawns.
Perhaps that not-so-subtle nudge resonated with Octavia because she opens up a bit. By this I mean she moves from “Whatever” to telling Velvet the traumatizing story of how she lost a third of her clan to Blind Worms in one of these quarries. Okay. That’s a complete 180, but I’ll take it. Velvet continues to have supposed insights about the Vacuans like, ‘Maybe they don’t cry because that’s a waste of water?’ and ‘Maybe they hate everyone on principal because of the past?’ and ‘I guess bullying is just something you’re supposed to survive out here’ (um… no.) In Velvet - and Myers’ - defense she acknowledges that none of these explanations excuse their actions… but I’m not so sure it explains them either. A few chapters ago we were hammering home how teens don’t have an emotional connection to their past, despite it not actually being that long ago (recall Coco’s conversation with Rumpole in class), but now we’re supposed to believe that all of these teens reject newcomers because of stuff that happened during a war they weren’t alive for? Also, I’m neither a doctor nor an anthropologist, but the concept of a desert people refusing to cry because it’s a waste of water - especially in an otherwise advanced civilization - seems suspect. I can buy someone being unable to cry because they’re currently dehydrated, but a whole culture denying themselves this outlet when most of them don’t actually lack water anymore is odd.
Granted, culture isn’t always logical. Case in point: memes. So let’s give that a pass. 
However, we’ve still got the issue of continuity across paragraphs. First Velvet is smug because she’s a better climber than Octavia. Then Octavia is ahead and supposedly annoyed that Velvet was slowing her down. It’s unclear when, or if, they’ve finished climbing at this point and a second later Octavia is climbing a tree - why didn’t Velvet do that? Really, I lay little blips like this at the feet of the editors, not the author(s), simply because as an author I know precisely how easy it is to lose track of every detail you’ve introduced. It becomes obvious to the reader when things don’t quite align, but it will often go unnoticed by the writer - like typos. (RIP my own work.) Which is why you need that second perspective to not just catch the big mistakes, but tweak all the smaller ones too. RWBY is now a part of WarnerMedia and Before the Dawn was published by Scholastic. There’s a standard here I don’t think either is meeting.
As said previously though, Octavia climbs a tree because Velvet - with faunus eyes - spotted a trinket the others had missed. Octavia falls, Velvet catches her, and a whole swarm of Ravagers show up, which seem to be a bat-like grimm. Nice. My gothic, vampire, Stellaluna loving ass can get behind that. 
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Behold: my childhood.
They make a run for it and we - finally - get some solidarity as Octavia admits that the relic is technically Velvet’s and Velvet wonders in turn if they can share it. I offered my kingdom for a kind exchange and I got it! Hurray! More importantly, apparently that is an option because the airbus coordinates have shown up on both their scrolls. I’m not going to pretend that I understand how that tech works, but that’s a level of world building we don’t actually need. Not unless the hypothetical of students piggybacking on another’s relic is a part of the evaluation. 
I love that Velvet used her camera flash to scare off the Ravager in their way. That’s a fantastic twist on the ‘Velvet will use her semblance and impress Octavia’ expectation as well as a great way to demonstrate that she is a formidable fighter, capable of paying attention to her situation/surroundings and responding accordingly.
There are more Ravagers though, incoming Blind Worms, an avalanche… and the airbus. A narrow escape indeed. Octavia drops that attention-catching, “Thank the Brothers” as they reach safety.
Going back to my earlier point about Shade seeming happy to kill its kids, apparently Velvet and Octavia were the last to reach the bus and Sun told the pilot to wait. That says good things about Sun, but horrible things about the test. If Sun hadn’t insisted on staying would Octavia and Velvet have had a way out? Why in the world wasn’t the pilot told to wait longer?? The whole timeline is confusing, with Sun and Velvet leaving the airship only a short time after everyone else, but it looks like the whole group was way ahead of them (the quarry is empty of both relics and people by the time they arrive), except Sun managed to get super far ahead of Velvet somehow, and their pilot was apparently working under an unspoken deadline… I’m just taking information at face value because if you try to piece it all together, good luck.
Also sorry, but I straight up laughed at Sun’s “You woke up the Ravagers. And you lived to tell the tale.” That is so unnecessarily dramatic. Oh no. Not the Ravagers. Literally the first thing I thought of was some B horror movie like
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Coming only to a streaming service near your couch because we’re still living through a pandemic. Wear your masks, friends!
Back to this very entertaining reaction. Sun, you and Velvet have both taken out Atlesian knights, you fought a gigantic sea monster with Blake, and Velvet just bypassed a nest of Ravagers with a simple bright light. If RWBY is going to randomly try and make the grimm threatening again, do it with stuff that actually reads as a significant threat to these fighters. After you’ve got your first years blasting through (Yang) and riding (Nora) bear grimm at initiation, a couple of bat grimm just doesn’t cut it. 
Moving on, Velvet’s iffy perspective rears its head once more as she thinks, “What if Sun had passed by the trinket in the tree, knowing it would be too dangerous to retrieve it? She and Octavia had not had that luxury.”
There’s a lot wrong with this theory: 
How do you know Sun has better vision, even as a fellow faunus? As Volume 7’s Tyrian attack brought to the surface, supposedly not every faunus has that advantage.
Velvet straight up says that she wasn’t able to see the Ravagers, otherwise she would have warned Octavia about them. The whole point is that they startled her and she fell. So what, Sun not only has faunus vision but better than Velvet’s? (Do monkeys have better vision than rabbits? I have no idea, but this is the kind of stuff I would google if I wanted to potentially draw attention to it in my book). 
If that trinket was too dangerous to retrieve, why did the instructors put it there in the first place? Fox mentioned things being unfair with his lack of sight, but that’s a pretty big difference: easy grabs in a supposedly abandoned quarry vs. a grab that wakes up the whole nest of grimm.
“She and Octavia had not had that luxury” why does this sound like another dig at Sun? Like it’s worth criticizing that he… got there first? Got lucky with the relics closer to the floor? Probably because everything is a dig at Sun in this book, including Velvet’s surprise that he might have “respect in his eyes.” Velvet! He was just asking about you, made the bus wait, and has always worn his heart on his sleeve! Sun’s respect/care is not in question, only how he chooses (at times) to display it.
Not that the story seems to get that. We can’t work through Sun’s questionable choices if we’re stuck in this never ending loop of ‘He’s so annoying/incompetent/willfully cruel’ into ‘Hark! is that a positive trait I see?’ and then back to ‘Never mind he’s awful.’ Maybe Velvet’s pride at his reaction to the Ravagers will finally move things forward.
Which is where we leave off. The airbus scares off the other Ravagers with its guns, the group heads back towards Shade (or a second part of the test? That did feel too much like a normal initiation to be fair), and Velvet ends with the equally dramatic line, “The initiation ritual had been hard and almost deadly, and even worse was yet to come: the assignment of the new teams.”
I have to say though, that is the most teen-accurate thought I’ve seen so far. An 18 year old would be more scared of their team social life than getting eaten by a monster lol.
On that note, drop a comment or an ask if you feel like being social yourself and I’ll see you during the next burst of NaNoWriMo energy! 💜
[ Ko-Fi ]
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gallickingun · 4 years
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i feel like.... having a crush/thirsting over an anime character as an adult these days is... really hard. i’m only 21 and i know how it looks but when there isn’t content of character that are my age i kind of just settle for this. i really really really love the concept and story for bnha; bakugo is my favorite character and he is a comfort character for me. | ik to a lot of people it’s weird and even i struggle w it sometimes but... its just, hard to explain..? sorry for rambling
no need to apologize, you have nothing to apologize for. 
i understand where everyone is coming from. i really do. but at the end of the day, you have to remember that these are FICTIONAL CHARACTERS. drawings on a page. they mean the world to us, but at the end of the day they are not real people. we are allowed to watch/read/listen to them and feel comforted, to see ourselves in them and fall in love with them and what we want for ourselves. 
here’s the thing - ask yourself this: are you going to post up at a high school and try to date a sophomore? are you going to actively seek out a relationship in real life, on this planet, with someone who is 15-17 years old? i know the answer for me is not no but hell no. as long as you can separate fiction from reality, and you know that you aren’t going to seek out any sort of relationship with someone of that age, i think you should take a breath and realize that you’re not as awful or weird or gross as you might think you are, or others are trying to make it out to be.
i think it’s interesting that we don’t apply these same principals to real-life television shows who use actors. i don’t see people upset at the sex scenes and thirsting over characters shown in riverdale, adventures of sabrina, the 100, etc. they’re all teenagers, so why don’t we feel the same way we do about them as we do about “cartoons”? and this is unpopular and no one wants to talk about it lol, but whatever if i’m digging my grave i may as well go deep. but how about we talk about how none of the characters portrayed as high schoolers look like they’re in high school? i’m sorry... iida tenya? that is a whole ass man right there. asahi from haikyuu?? whole ass man !! but i don’t see anyone getting upset with the creators for sexualizing teenagers, just those of us enjoying the content. the same goes for the comparison of real-life tv shows to anime.
i’ve said this before and i’ll say it again because it’s the truth - when i watch the show, i either imagine myself in high school (oh to be young again) or i imagine the characters aged up to pro hero status. like, i see what they are in the current time and morph them in my mind to what i believe they’ll look like when they’re approximately 25. like have you seen my height headcanon post?? that’s literally what i think about when i watch the show lol. a 6′3 beefcake ground zero, not that little blonde gremlin who has some room to grow!
at the end of the day, you have to come to terms with it. i get that anime is taboo and weird and whatever, but it’s also not. anime is what you make of it. so enjoy it! indulge in thirsting over your favorite characters, enjoy reading smut or fluff or angst. create oc’s! imagine their story! you should be free to explore what you love as long as you’re not harming anyonoe.
i’ve said this a dozen times. i’ll say it a dozen more. 
IF YOU FIND A PERSON, A TAG, OR A POST YOU DO NOT FEEL COMFORTABLE READING/SEEING, BLOCK IT. YOU ARE IN CHARGE OF YOUR OWN EXPERIENCE ONLINE. IF YOU DO NOT LIKE SOMETHING OR SOMEONE, YOU HAVE THE POWER TO STOP LOOKING AT IT. KEEP SCROLLING, BLOCK THE TAG, BLOCK THE BLOG, ETC. 
i really hope you’re able to come to terms with your love for bnha and bakugou, because they deserve your love and you deserve to be comforted by consuming media that makes you happy. i’m so thankful that you trusted me enough to reach out, and i’m sorry i’ve stayed relatively silent for so long, but i’m tired. i hope this all made sense, and i hope it made you feel a little bit better. i’m sending you all my love 💕
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cadomoisspokenfor · 3 years
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Legion Rewatch Notes,
Chapter 7:
The King In Yellow
Walter’s really putting his all into that whistling.
Kerry ended up losing Walter eventually. But I guess she was chased out of her hiding place by the zombies.
Theory: Much like how David feels most stable and confident when Syd’s around, Kerry feels most stable and confident when Cary’s around. She’s much less likely to lose a fight or get scared if Cary is in the vicinity. This would also explain why she feels so betrayed that Cary left her in Mental Clockworks. She works best when he’s around (power of love and all that) so when he’s not around she constantly feels like she’s on the ropes. Maybe only subconsciously though.
Lenny says “Hey” a lot.
So Farouk... actually seems distressed here. This is him at his least chill. He’s just shoved a person he actually cares about into a corner of their mind cause he just couldn’t understand them, the dream he’s created is collapsing and he has no plan on how to deal with it (rare for Farouk), and the location of his own body (his temple) is still lost to him after all this time.
Also, there’s apparently no specific place it could be. Farouk’s body could be anywhere on the globe. I guess he and everyone who knows about is aware that he could come back to his body if he knows where it is?
Even though it’s pointed out a lot I’ll also note that Charles is in his wheelchair in Amy’s flashback. And given future/past events (confusing, I know) this either means Farouk is the one who put him in a wheelchair, or whatever caused it happened between defeating Farouk and giving away baby David. And there’s... really not a lot of time in between those 2 events.
As we’ve seen before, while Farouk can probably see into Oliver’s ice cube residents, he can’t actually go inside or do anything to Oliver (or his guest) while he’s in there.
Farouk doesn’t want the dream to end until he’s located his body.
Cary is used to finishing Oliver’s sentences.
Cary and Oliver think very alike. The biggest difference between them I suppose is Oliver’s reality bending powers.
David never agreed to the barbershop quartet but Oliver put his name down anyways.
I never caught this before, but the thing that makes it obvious to Cary is the fact that the parasite called itself “King”. Before when watching this I thought “it’s just a name,” but I guess the point is... what other villain would be so hubris filled as to advertise who they are so openly. It speaks to the brazenness of Farouk. If Charles had ever checked back and found out David was talking to some invisible friend named “King” Farouk woulda been discovered then and there. I can only assume this means the name “King” was taunt of sorts. A joke only Farouk was in on. Not to mention, Farouk probably would never have settled for a name any less dignifying.
Oliver doesn’t remember any of his past friends, but he does remember Farouk. I wonder, did him and Cary hear about Farouk before or after Charles defeated him? Farouk hasn’t been publicly doing things for 30 years, and the only event that could reasonably be linked to him is Meiser Sunday. If they knew about him before Charles defeated him then that would just speak to his prolificness as a villain, I guess. “The Shadow King”, an unstoppable force for years until a random prodigy mutant gets him on his first try... or so they thought. I believe that’s how it happened in the comics too.
I’ll also note, Charles is an important figure in the mutant community, but it shouldn’t be discounted that the mutant community still existed and had a whole rich history before Charles even stepped on the scene. It seems like either Xaviers School doesn’t exist in this timeline, or they just don’t know about it. And given that, Summerland seemingly founded itself off the same general ideas of the Xavier School, but completely independently. Like 2 people coming up with the same idea on different sides of the planet.
Farouk’s weakness as Oliver puts it is, “He puts all of his energy into tricking David. Didn’t think to watch his six.” I wonder... is this a consistent weakness of Farouk’s? Could this be what Oliver means when he says he found his weakness in s2?
Oliver admits Farouk is too powerful for him. It’s not like he’s one to have a power complex, but it is interesting how shameless he is about it. He doesn’t really philosophize about that kind of thing, he’s matter of fact about it. Farouk’s got more measurable power than me, we need to find another way around him. He also notes though that *David* could defeat Farouk if need be. Everyone recognizes David as the top of the food chain.
Small note: I guess this is how it works between omega lvls. Always thinking of ways around each others raw abilities. Farouk knows David is too strong for him in s2, so he finds away around it. David knows he might not be able to hold out against Farouk’s built up experience, so he finds away around it. Brains over brawn every time, it would seem.
Cary feels really really bad for David. Seeing him screaming his brains out in a locked box knowing full well how much David hates small space. It’s very sweet. But also, 2 episodes Cary seemed a bit more standoffish about David. Knowing what he knows now recontextualized all those past events. David is a victim of something incomprehensibly terrible. He sees that now.
My boi Dan’s gonna need a lozenge after this one.
“We’re gonna need everybody.” They never get Ptonomy :/
I didn’t pick up on any of the other times, but Syd’s job here is to be a distraction. Sure, she has to protect the others in the process, but freeing them from the dream is the job of Cary, Oliver, and Melanie.
Still though, David is the victim who needs help here. He’s not the hero who saves them, he’s the one in need of saving. And Syd takes charge in the plan to do so and is tasked with protecting the others, making her once again closer to the hero archetype than David is. In the moment at least.
Syd’s talking fast cause they don’t exactly have all the time in the world here.
The zombies vanish but the architecture remains. There are “degrees” of real in the astral plane.
“Just thought it’d be interesting.” She’s over the whole “jumpscare haunted house” thing by now.
Silly me, the Melanie scene took place after Cary went to gather people. So it’s definitely Cary in the suit.
Melanie’s glad to see he’s back but she’s not completely love struck. Probably both cause he doesn’t remember her, and cause lovestruck Melanie was a result of her mind being altered to fit the delusion. Cary is guiding them out of the delusion so she’s back to her old self basically. Rational, and concerned with the mission.
This isn’t important, I just like how Melanie wakes him up here. It’s sweet, and bitter, cause it’s too late for him anyways.
Why does Farouk simulate this whole process for Rudy? What’s the use in tricking him if he already can barely do anything? We know Rudy gets him eventually, but it’s just surprising that Farouk recognizes him as being a potential threat.
Cary neglected to inform Syd who else he was personally waking.
Is Walter seeing the zombies too? Unclear. But he’s less chill about his tormenting now.
David starts using humor to cope. From what we’ve seen he’s been non-stop screaming for a while. It seems like he stops panicking as much specifically because his mind is fracturing to help him cope.
His first alter (that we see). Rational Mind.
RM says the coffin is just an “idea.” Very specific word choice there.
Rm tells him to forget all the “lies” he learned in memory work and the MRI. That was all Summerland stuff, though. “It’s your mind.” Essentially, trust yourself. You know who you are, don’t let anyone else tell you otherwise. Not even your new friends. Very reminiscent of, “You decide what is real and what is not.”
David doesn’t want to call his adoptive parents his parents anymore.
David’s happy to finally contextualize Farouk as a mutant and not a mental illness. It all starts making since to him, his whole life.
RM’s the first one to say “boohoo,” and it’s in response to David’s sadness over his bio-parents giving him away.
“I am pretty, I am loved.” “Good, keep going.” This mindset David’s falling into is specifically encouraged by his alters. In fact, it’s RM that pushes him down this path in the first place. David (non-Shadow King possessed David) has been avoiding this thought all season.
David’s a bit wrong here, and I think the difference tells us something important. David assumes Farouk possessed him after he was already living in the Haller’s house. But, we know it seemingly happened before Charles even got back from Morocco. So, given that Gabrielle’s mental health was already bad from post-partum depression (alternatively, it’s just the depression she already had) and Charles leaving her alone to go to Morocco, Farouk coming in and haunting the house probably sent things over the edge. David was most likely given away because Gabrielle wasn’t well enough to care for him like he needed, and Charles... 🤷🏾‍♀️ tbh. Might just’ve not wanted to raise David without Gabrielle. They both said they didn’t ant him to turn out like them. In s3 it’s made to seem like the house haunting was a combination of David and Farouk. David’s haunting time travelly presence probably made things worse, but Farouk would’ve gotten to the baby much sooner if not for him, and without David in the way Farouk probably would’ve upped his own intentional torments. The goal was revenge after all.
David assumes Farouk’s goal is revenge upon the whole world. Makes sense since that’s what Farouk’d been encouraging David to all season. And what he’ll continue to encourage him towards throughout s2 & 3.
Syd “woke him up.” She makes him more stable and sane. She grounds him in reality.
“I was sick, but I’m not sick anymore.” A moment of quiet deliberation with his alter and then he awakens with newfound confidence and a plan. This will repeat in a very tragic way later on.
Kerry, Syd, and a damaged comrade in a wheelchair. If I had nickel for every time this happens I’d have 2 nickels. Very weird it happens twice. Unless... mental clockworks and the end of s3 are supposed to parallel each other.
I assume the astral-plane diving suit protects whoever’s wearing it from psychic threats, much like the ice cube. At the moment, no one’s wearing it.
Sometimes psychics powers require a bit of miming to manifest. Oliver can’t just wave his hand and make a shield, not a strong enough one at least. Similarly, Farouk can’t just expand his mind into the future, he needs to go through a whole time machine building process in the astral plane.
Cary and Melanie seeing Walter get killed must hit hard for them considering he used to be a student of theirs. Sure, he turned against them, but still...
They juxtapose Walter dying with Rudy fully waking up. I wonder if that means it was his powers that were keeping Rudy docile and not necessarily the stab wound.
David is the one that wakes them all up, destroys the dream, and puts them back in their real bodies. And just in time for Cary to place the halo on his head. This is I think the first time David does a real act of super-heroism. The only potential one previously is saving Amy and he wasn’t really the one in control there. This is his first win against Farouk.
David’s not only got control of his powers, but control of himself for the first time, too. And it’s to the point where he’s perceiving things at lightning speeds and moving fast enough to catch bullets. Along with whatever power he’s using to halt the bullets momentum too. For now at least, this is our hero.
They play sinister music whenever he does the bright white light teleport. He does it again at the end of s2. Is it a specific kind of teleport, or is he just adding flair?
David didn’t teleport them directly to the base.
Kerry sadly looks at Rudy’s body.
Melanie looked around for Oliver but in doing so missed him meeting up with the others.
Everyone’s relaxing after their long fought for victory. David and Syd seem really happy. They find Oliver funny/charming.
When Cary’s talking to Kerry, in the background I can barely make out everyone else talking about potatoes.
David’s fine with Amy apologizing, just not in front of the others.
Instead of “The Poor Woodcutter and His Wife” Oliver calls it the “The story of The Lady and the Crane.”
Farouk doesn’t like small spaces either. Ha.
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houchlife · 3 years
Text
Top 7 Law Of Attraction Tips To Manifest More Of What You Want!
By Heather Mathews Author of Manifestation Miracle      “Everything is within your power, and your power is within you.” ― Janice Trachtman Charlie, a stay at home dad, works out of his living room while looking after his three-year-old toddler. As a social media consultant, he depends on his laptop to make a living. The problem is that his beat up computer was as old as his kid, and it was always glitching on him. So Charlie kept focusing on getting a new computer – a 13-inch Macbook Pro in particular. Eventually, his old laptop gave out, which made him panic a bit. So Charlie went online to look for another one while having the shiny new Macbook in the back of his mind. After hours of searching, he couldn’t find a reasonably priced model. So he was about to settle on another type of laptop and was close to closing the sale. But at the last minute, Charlie decided to check the price listings for a used version of the computer that he REALLY wanted. And just like that, someone was selling a six-month old Macbook Pro for a price significantly cheaper than a store-bought one. So Charlie got what he wanted, and at a better deal than he had hoped for! Now, Charlie’s incredible stroke of luck seemed like a fluke to him at first, but then another awesome thing happened shortly after. You see, Charlie was also looking for a new job because he felt stuck in his current one. So he had his sights set on another company with a position in mind. The truth was that he wasn’t all that confident he was even qualified for the position, but he went over the job description again and again. Charlie even printed the job ad and put it on his refrigerator door so he could see it every day. A couple of weeks after his interview, he got a call from the company and said he got the job. On Charlie’s first day, his new boss told him, “Honestly, your skillset isn’t an exact match for what we were looking for. But I really liked how you did at the interview…and besides, we can train you for the other things you need to learn, anyway. You have a great attitude and that’s more important than being 100% qualified for the job.” Click Here To Discover the Lazy Person’s Secret To Get Everything You’ve Ever Wished For      Is It Coincidence - Or Something Else at Work? It’s easy to brush off Charlie’s streak as plain dumb luck, but could he have WILLED his good fortune to happen? After all, the common element between getting his new laptop and the new job was that he focused on both things intensely. Charlie kept it in his thoughts all the time. More than that, he created a detailed picture of his desired state in his mind. He imagined what it would be like to hold his new laptop and how he’d feel working in the new job he was aiming for. Charlie visualized both scenarios so vividly that he could almost taste it. Whether he knew it or not, he was putting the basic principle of The Law of Attraction to work - and it served him well. As the name implies, this law decrees that “like attracts like.” There’s a global movement behind this belief, and it says that the kind of thoughts you send out to the Universe emit a certain frequency – be it helpful or harmful. And you have the power to control the wavelength you operate on, which in turn attracts circumstances that match your energy. So by focusing on positive outcomes and giving out positive vibrations, you can turn your thoughts into a tangible force of good in your life! On the other side of the coin, dwelling on the negative aspects of life and focusing your attention on the things you resent attracts even MORE negativity into your world. Like Charlie, you can think of something specific you want, and hold that image in your mind. Create all the details that bring the picture to life, then believe that you already have it. When you go about your day thinking that the object of your desire is already a matter of fact… …this sends out a clear, strong message to the Universe that you truly WANT and BELIEVE it. But this is just the tip of the iceberg; there are other ways to raise your frequency even higher. By following these 7 Tips to Create the Life You’ve Always Dreamed Of, you’ll naturally attract everything you’ve ever wanted – and MORE:
#1: Set aside time to focus on what you desire
    The first habit is simple enough: give yourself at least 5-7 minutes daily to visualize the things you want to turn into reality.
You can do this by finding a quiet place to contemplate, then sit upright with your eyes closed. While keeping your desires front and center in your thoughts, breathe deeply in and out.
Focus on your breath and the sensations your body is feeling, and use that as anchor to keep your thoughts from straying.
If your mind does go on a tangent, gently bring yourself back to your breathing AND your desired future state.
You’ll get a lot of benefits from doing this for just a few minutes every day. For instance, many studies have proven the stress-reducing properties of meditation.
A study at the Massachusetts General Hospital showed that people who tried their meditation program experienced significantly less health problems than before.
They ended up not having to see a doctor or go to the emergency room, saving them about $2,300 in medical costs for EACH person!
On top of that of course, meditation also helps you keep your eye on the prize and give you the determination to make it happen.
Some people however, have trouble meditating and get easily distracted.
If you need a little guidance with this habit, I’ve got a special gift for you – but more on that later…
MORE ABOUT  Motivational / Transformational
#2: Be grateful and practice gratitude
    Ever hear the expression “Thank your lucky stars”?
Back in ancient times, people believed that celestial bodies played a huge role in someone’s destiny.
Today, many still believe that these same external forces affect our lives.
The Law of Attraction draws from this belief, and it states that we should be gratefull whenever the Universe sends something good our way.
This is another way of fine tuning your frequency. When you actively pay attention to the positive things that happen around you, it acts like a magnet that attracts similar things.
And by being thankful for your blessings, you’re sending a powerful message to the Universe that essentially translates to:
“Thank you, that was awesome! More please!”
MORE ABOUT  Motivational / Transformational
#3: Take a leap of faith
    The main challenge that people have with manifesting their desires is dealing with the world of the intangible.
It can be daunting (and even discouraging) to imagine a future outcome that hasn’t happened yet.
It takes some faith to push past that hazy uncertainty, and not everyone has it in them to do so.
So you need to check your inner Doubting Thomas at the door for a moment and appreciate how other people have used the Law of Attraction to succeed.
Consider the great figures from the past: Albert Einstein, Nelson Mandela, Marie Curie, Vincent Van Gogh and Nikola Tesla.
All of them were shining examples of how they used their mind and willpower to create something valuable in this world.
They raised their own frequency and as result, had a different energy from the rest of humanity.
Even though they’re gone, their legacy lives on, and we can still feel its impact today.
It’s all because they took a brave step into the unknown.
Even though they couldn’t see how their work would ripple through the next several decades, they still powered through.
The skepticism that people have is the result of growing up.
As you get older and have more experiences, a certain amount of jadedness sets in.
That’s why you won’t find any of that in kids. Just think about how children play make-believe.
When they yell, “The floor is lava!” you can bet they’ll be scrambling for the nearest couch or chair to avoid getting “burned.”
On a certain level, they TRULY believe that the floor is literally molten rock.
They can see the hot, glowing lava, burning everything its path…
…and they do everything to stay out of its way.
That’s the power the mind and imagination in action.
Learn how to see the world on this level again. That way, you can see a bright future before it happens – then go on to make it a reality.
Click Here To Learn How to Force the Universe to Manifest Your Dream Life 
MORE ABOUT  Motivational / Transformational
#4: Keep on keepin’ on
One of the realities of this world is that you can’t eliminate adversity.
It’s always going to be an uphill climb at some point, especially when you’ve just taken on a new challenge.
You’ve been eating right and working out, but the pounds aren’t quite flying off as you’d hoped.
You started a side income project, but your cash flow hasn’t been anything more than a trickle.
You’ve tried beating your depression with exercise, therapy and medication, but the dark thoughts still charge at you like a freight train.
That’s called RESISTANCE.
It will always be there, even as you dig deep and do everything in your power to manifest the reality you want.
Being a grown-up means expecting those external circumstances to work against you.
Your best response? PUSH BACK.
Keep your inner world together, and the outside world will follow suit.
Dumbledore once told Harry Potter, “Help will always be given at Hogwarts to those who ask for it.”
Remember: the hero of the story is never a one-person army.
Harry had Hermione and Ron.
Luke had Obi-Wan and Yoda.
And you don’t have to fly solo in YOUR journey.
Think about the people in your inner circle – are they giving you the energy, motivation and inspiration to succeed?
If the company you keep sneers at growth and being better, maybe it’s time to look for other friends to round out your squad.
Seek people who lead by example and can show you how to overcome that resistance in your life.
Learn from them and let their enthusiasm rub off you.
While you’re at it, use technology to connect to like-minded folks who can help you in your quest. Open your phone or laptop and fire up YouTube, Vimeo or any other video streaming site.
TED talks, self-help lectures and tons of other empowering content are literally at your fingertips.
The Universe has too much abundance for you to ignore.
We’re part of a vast human network, and our collective energy affects everyone else in ways we can’t yet fully comprehend.
This network has always been around; the Internet merely accelerated it. Tap into it and unleash its power.
MORE ABOUT  Motivational / Transformational
#5: Tune out your Negative Ned (or Nancy)
    There’s always that voice in the back of your head that kicks in when life gets tough.
It loves whispering things in your ear, usually at the height of your frustration and despair:
- “You totally blew that one, why do you even bother trying?”
- “You had one job and you screwed it up like always…I’m not even surprised.”
- “Getting back on the horse, are we? I give it a week before you go back to your old ways. Better to quit while you’re ahead!”
- “You actually thought he was complimenting you? Oh, bless your heart…it’s called ‘small talk’ and ‘being nice’.”
If you’re like the rest of the human species, you’re going to run into those nasty folks called insecurity, self-doubt and fear.
They’re going to take up space in your head and try to drown you out with their noise.
Rumi, a 13th-century Persian poet and scholar, knew this well. It his poem “The Guest House”, he spoke an ancient truth about the human condition.
He likened all our thoughts and feelings – both good and bad – as visitors who stopped by the guest house of the soul.
And this line struck me the most:
“The dark thought, the shame, the malice. Meet them at the door laughing and invite them in.”
Once I understood what it meant, I realized that I didn’t have to resist it. I could simply let my obnoxious guests do their thing, and see them out.
It’s not about covering your ears and going, “La la la la! I can’t hear you!”
Acknowledging their existence in your head is NOT the same as letting them win.
The world’s greatest achievers go through bouts of darkness and anger like everyone else.
The main difference is that they use their failures as material for an instruction manual called “What NOT to Do and How to Do It Better The Next Time Around”.
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#6: Ditch your story
    You shouldn’t stop at managing your negative thoughts, however. You need to peel back another layer and go deeper.
Here’s the thing: you grew up on a set of beliefs, whether you’re aware of it or not.
Your parents, teachers, friends and pretty much everyone you knew growing up contributed to your programming.
You don’t know it, but you operate on this programming on a daily basis.
And it influences every decision you make – and how you choose to see the world.
Now this can be a good thing if you grew up around people who were positive, motivated and had a good outlook on life…
…but this is the real world we’re talking about, so NOT everyone had that kind of effect on you.
Somewhere along your journey, someone discouraged you in a subtle way, or put some sort of label that you can’t shake off.
Words like “Underachiever”, “Oddball”, “Loser”, “Nerd”, “Small Fry”, “Ugly Duckling” and “Black Sheep” come to mind…
…and each one is damaging in its own toxic way.
Sadly, most people carry this invisible weight their whole life.
But starting today, you can lay those bricks on the ground and walk away for good. You don’t have to carry that weight for anyone, especially not for THEM.
Stop living your story based on the false narrative that your negative programming created.
All those preconceived beliefs need to go if you want to attract happiness and prosperity in your life.
I’ve seen people achieve INCREDIBLE things – even the impossible – just by doing this one thing.
Lionel, a heroin addict from Michigan, was in and out of jail for the longest time.
But after overdosing within an inch of his life, he decided to ditch his old story.
Even after everyone gave up on Lionel and called him a “screw-up”, he turned it all around.
He let go of the labels that people had been putting on him for YEARS…
…and Lionel decided he didn’t have to be any of those things anymore.
Lionel created a NEW story for himself – one where he was finally free of his crippling addiction and lived a clean, sober life.
What kind of story do YOU want to live out?
MORE ABOUT  Motivational / Transformational
#7: Make your affirmations “pop”
    You might have heard of people making declarations about themselves to manifest them as truth, and not just as an opinion.
When you affirm some truth about yourself, it validates the awesomeness within you.
Words of kindness heal the soul and help forgive past failures.
In short, it’s about LOVING yourself.
After all, you can’t give what you don’t have.
However, saying “Boy I sure love myself!” doesn’t quite do the trick.
To make your affirmations stick in your subconscious, it needs to have a little something extra.
Don’t stop at “I love me!”- take it up another notch to really drive the point home.
Try these on for size:
- “I love myself so much that I want to use my gifts and share them with the world. I want to take this love inside me and use it to lift other people up.”
- “By sharing the love I have, I possess the power to change myself for the better, and the world around me.”
- “I am love, light, peace and prosperity. Anger, hate and scarcity have no power over me.”
- Aside from loving yourself, you can also infuse a dash of humor in your affirmations. Who says you have to be so grim with his Law of Attraction stuff, anyway?
When you add a bit of levity while you affirm yourself, it shushes your Negative Ned (or Nancy) into silence.
Try coming up with statements like these:
- “I’m so awesome that I kick mediocrity in its big fat butt!”
- “I’ve come here to be awesome at everything I do and kick major butt. And I’m all out of butts to kick.”
- “Did you say something, self-doubt? Sorry, I can’t hear you over the sound of my awesomeness!”
It’s all a matter of finding the right attitude and tone that suits you. Take a crack at making these affirmations, and you’ll soon find your true inner voice.
What matters is that you inject your affirmations with a serious amount of attitude, and above all, ENERGY.
Without that energy, you won’t give your messages enough “juice” to reach the Universe and show up on its radar.
Those who practice the Law of Attraction often combine these affirmations with their meditation sessions to hit two birds with one stone.
And the results are nothing short of phenomenal.
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