#I WOKE UP AND WAS ONLY SUPPOSED TO DRINK WATER AND NOW I AM BLESSED

[tarosin]

the great adventures of y/n tommy jack tubbo and george

requested yes/no

part 5 of the great adventures series

summary: training for the military

warning: cursing

AN: really sorry about this tumblr won’t let me change/add paragraphs so could look very weird

the journey there was quick for you, you spent the trip asleep in the back of the car whilst the others were discussing what you were all about to do “How difficult do you think it’s going to be” “dude it’s a military assault course” you woke up halfway there to the noise of the radio playing “afternoon y/n”“afternoon sorry I fell asleep I’m not used to being woken up early in the morning, I blame you guys and ranboo”“y/n have you ever wanted to join the military” “I can't say I have no” “well you’re going to love what we’re doing” “what are we doing” “you’ll see!”

you stood picking up more rocks and handing them to tubbo whilst Tommy and George began to film the introduction to the vlog “were in the jungle” confused you turned to tubbo “psst tubbo what the fuck are we doing, why are we in a woods” before tubbo had time to answer Tommy already began to answer your question telling you that you’re all training for the military, not taking him seriously you started laughing as you all were walking it was only when you were handed a jumpsuit to cover your clothes you realised it wasn’t a joke, you would be lying if you said you were ready for this, after all, you spent your free time playing Minecraft you wasn’t exactly great at sports

you managed to put the jumpsuit on pretty quickly unlike Tommy who was quite clearly struggling to get it on over his trainers “come on sergeant simons were doing a military assault course and you’re struggling to put on the clothes”after struggling to put clothes on the five of you stood together getting photos whilst you all looked decent “me and my boys in the jungle” “This isn’t going to go well” “we’re going to destroy it” “NO”

you hadn’t even reached the course yet and you were already tripping up over rocks and sticks that were on the muddy trail “we’re walking to our deaths..y/n is already falling over” “Hey I didn’t sign up to do exercise” once you finally reached the start of the course you were met with a canon, a dog and a man in a yellow jumper you stood as a team listening to what you were about to do and how you were actually a team of six, you hoped he meant the dog was a team member but no turns out the canon was the sixth member

“We have to take the canon with us” “...and take it apart into six pieces at each obstacle and rebuild it ” you handed your phone to the Russ, not trusting yourself to keep it on you especially since you were already tripping up before reaching the assault course “thank you” “good luck” “huh” you didn’t have time to process what was said as Mr military began counting down from three, the five of you ran to the first obstacle tubbo dragging the canon Tommy climbed over the net first with tubbo following after “What happens if I fall” it was as though you and tubbo had read each other’s mind as you both responded with “you’ll die” “death” you climbed over next with a wheel “reckon I can slide down the net” “that will hurt y/n don’t do- and you’re already doing it” you slid down the net despite George telling you not to do so, it didn’t take too long for the others to get over, you all began reassembling the canon “can we talk about our feelings” “I feel like shit I jumped out of a plane not long ago now I feel like I’m doing PE all over again” “Y/N JUST HELP BUILD THE CANON” “I'M TRYING ODDLY ENOUGH I'M NOT BUILT FOR THE MILITARY”once the canon was built Tommy and tubbo ran off with it “who’s going to tell them we need to test it” once Mr military shouted they ran back “why do we have to do this” “it’s the fucking rules Tommy and life is full of them” “like taxes” “tax fraud” a few seconds later the five of you yelled “bang” neither of you saying it at the same time “it didn’t work” “yes it did now come on”

you all ran towards the next obstacle, a giant wall. you all quickly dismantled the canon, Tommy went over first and began bickering with Mr military about him not being his dad whilst you tubbo and jack struggled to pass over the heaviest part of the canon “lift and lift” “really George? I thought we could just throw it over and hope he catches it” “Please don’t do that” “I am very sorry George but I'm struggling here” you continued your struggling tubbo tried to help Tommy through his words “you’re strong bossman I believe in you” “by the way, you really picked the shortest people to do this” part of the canon landed with a thud “welp hope he’s not dead” you climbed over next again carrying the wheel “he’s not dead guys don’t worry” you laughed as George took his time getting over the wall “I'm poving” “GET OVER THE WALL” you all stood questioning what time you were on completely forgetting that you were supposed to reassemble the canon “This is going to be embarrassing” “you guys could be rebuilding the canon” you could have built and tested the canon quickly however Tommy George and tubbo began telling people to subscribe whilst you built the canon with jack “we’re so good at this” “heh maybe not” you all test-fired the canon and made your way to the next obstacle

you were sent to go over the rope first, this was extremely difficult for you, the rope kept swaying as you walked causing you to lose your balance on multiple occasions “step on the V” “I’m going to fall” you made it over after a couple of minutes, like tubbo you also felt a bit ill, you assumed it was because it was quite hot and a lot was going on “how you feeling y/n” “Honestly, I’m jealous of ranboo, he’s at home living his best life and I’m in the middle of the woods overheating and climbing but no it’s pretty funny watching the others” you laughed as you overheard tubbo talking about how they’re only three obstacles in and how he’s going to die “YOU GOT THIS TUBBO!” Tommy crossed next, like you, he took his time he was then followed by tubbo who was trying to speed run walking over the rope you waited for jack and George cheering them on whilst Tommy was asking around for water and complaining about wearing a gamer hoodie. at this point, everyone seemed unmotivated “3 2 1.. bang”

“oh lovely..tires” tubbo went through first with the heaviest part of the canon “ill help you tubbo” you following behind helping him carry it due to it being stupidly heavily “so how are you tubbo” “AAAAAAAAAAA” “aye me too bud” you and tubbo decided that from now you two were going to work as a pair so it would be easier for you both, over the past few weeks tubbo became one of your closest friends the pair of you even started trending on Twitter as you did an irl stream where you both went on a walk at the beach and met several fans. whilst you and tubbo were making your way through Tommy jack and George we’re trying to figure out who should take what. “there’s piss in this one” “what the fuck?!” the pair of you finally got out from the tires “good job you two” “thank you” you rested your head on tubbos shoulder trying to get your breath back “I don’t think I’m made for the military” a few moments later Tommy made it to the tire full of water and put his finger in it “PEE” “Tommy why-” you stood looking around at the scenery, the sound of Tommy yelling about crawling away from George and that he’s ‘touched the piss’ was enough the drag you away from your own thoughts, you watched the others struggling to get through the tires and was amazed at the fact tubbo went back in to help them. you tried to ignore Tommy and George being dramatic as you tried to figure out how many more obstacles you had to go but you got distracted by George “ill just eat you if you die” “Mr military I’d like some help right about now” you walked over to Tommy and helped him get out of the tires “thanks y/n” “welcome” “how you doing bossman you know I pulled through your part...what are you doing that’s George's water” Tommy decided to throw the bottle to you so you could have a drink as he remembered you’d not had a drink since you landed from jumping out of the plane “Thanks, Tommy” “YOU BOTH DRANK GEORGES WATER” “he can drink the piss” “what Tommy said” you laughed as you walked over to where jack was in the tires “ HI JACK” “Jesus christ you scared me, hi y/n” you stood waiting for everyone to finish “I know exactly what the slowest time was” “we’re going for a new record it’s fine” “of being the slowest?” “yeah” “you know what Mr military ill clart you” “you’ll what me” “I’m gonna just go over here” you walked over to where parts of the canon were and got ready to assemble it again whilst George began throwing water over jack and tubbo to bless them then did the same to Tommy, you hid behind a tree thinking he wouldn’t notice you, however, he did and within a minute you too had water poured on you “Thanks, I was thirsty” “oh we know” “The fuck is that supposed to mean” “HELP BUILD THE CANON PLEASE” like last time you all built the canon tested it and ran to the next obstacle

“can we just you know drag the already built canon under there with us” “absolutely not” “I tried” you all disassembled it again and like last time you and tubbo went first crawling under “I don’t want to alarm you all but it is soaking wet in here” “delightful” a few moments later you were both working well “tubbo I’m scared of the dark and it’s pitch black” “you’ve got this bossman we’re almost done” you calmed down quickly until Tommy decided to jump above the pair of you

“SORRY” “TOMMY I SWEAR TO GOD” “YOU DICK” you laughed slightly and tubbo checked up on you “you okay?” “I'm fine if you’re fine” “come on let’s finish this thing” the pair of you continued and finished relatively quickly tubbo got out first “NEVER AGAIN” “Sorry about that buddy” “WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU” you helped push part of the canon out so tubbo could easily drag it out he then reached out so you could hold his hand and help pull you out “I've never been so happy to see the light” the pair of you sat on the floor waiting for the others to finish, you both made a bet on who was going to laugh first somehow you won as tubbo laughed at George and jack struggling to crawl through “YOU LAUGHED” “OH SHITTT” Russ came over to you both whilst recording so he could ask about how everything’s going “I’m covered in mud and the jumpsuit is wet, it isn’t a good day for the y/n community it was dark as hell in there “Tommy is a dick and tried to kill me and y/n” “I DIDN'T TRY TO KILL YOU BOTH” “I think he heard us” “WE ALL DID WERE NOT DEAF” “NO, BUT ACCORDING TO INSTAGRAM YOU'RE DEAD” you stared directly into the camera “sometimes it’s like I still hear jack talking to me” George and jack started complaining about how much further the is to go and how it was dirty and Tommy's response about being sorry it doesn’t fit their tory lifestyle made you burst out laughing “YOU LAUGHED” “tubbo my beloved you laughed ages ago you’ve already lost” “But we’re equal now” “no” the pair of you stood bickering to the point you didn’t realise the others had finished the obstacle and were shouting for you to test the canon “Y/N TUBBO WE NEED TO TEST THE CANON” the pair of you ran over “3 2 1 BANG”

“just going to warn you all you see that black cloud over there” “oh yay a storm is coming” you grabbed a wheel and followed behind jack across the wooden bridge “y/n he’s been splintered” “oh no poor George” “these are my gaming fingers” “no gaming for you I guess” “Stop talking about gaming dickheads” you spent a lot of time talking to George and jack whilst crossing over trying not to fall over you all even made a few plans to stream a laugh and the stream ends on jacks channel soon

you were all building the canon again whilst being informed you weren’t even halfway through and already 40 minutes in “high score” “well it’s definitely high” “Y/N??” “coming tubbo hang on my shoelace came undone” after tying your shoelace you grabbed a wheel and caught up to tubbo “if you go over tubbo ill pass it over to you and we can keep doing that” this method worked well for you both tubbo would climb over you would pass the wheel and middle part of the canon then climb over and repeat the process you heard Tommy in the background complaining about the fact he’s wearing jeans and jacks response “Yeah but I’m wearing jeans” “tubbo and y/n are almost done and you’re complaining about jeans” “jean boy pops off” “I'M WEARING JEANS AS WELL QUIT COMPLAINING” “Can we just go home and play smash bros” “Tommy this was your idea I didn’t even get on an option” “Sorry about that y/n but you get to spend time with me and gogy” “lucky me” you weren���t going to lie this was hard work and you were exhausted you felt like you could just fall asleep right where you were stood however tubbo wasn’t going to let that happen “I’m never going on an adventure with Tommy again” “me either” this of course was bullshit and you were both going on another adventure soon you stood watching your friends struggle to get over the obstacles you decided to offer your support and went to help jack and George using a similar method to that you used with tubbo “thanks y/n” “anytime” “y/n you could have helped me, tubbo pulled me over I could have been injured” “very sorry to hear that sergeant simons sucks to suck I guess” you all reassembled the canon tested it and ran to the next obstacle “I hate it here” “there’s a storm on the way” “Thanks, y/n for the input” “welcome George” you all noticed the net luckily you didn’t have to disassemble the canon this very well could be because you were running far behind and a storm was on its way. you watched as the others went through and joked about tubbo losing his shoe and Tommy getting stuck, this obstacle wasn’t made for you either as you kept getting caught on the net “I'VE BEEN CAUGHT AGAIN” jack lifted the net for you again so you could easily crawl through “thank you jack” you all then made it to the next obstacle Tommy crawled on the metal bars with you following after him whilst George used the monkey bars once you all made it across you had to walk across many metal planks used to form a bridge Tommy walked close behind you knowing you were extremely clumsy and didn't want you to fall “irl nettles” “The fuck are you on about Tommy I don’t think you’re following my advice about going outside” you all dissembled the canon as you got to the tires the only difference this time was you needed to climb over them “it’s rather windy” “there’s dirt in my eye” like before you and tubbo used the same method “look at them go” “I LIKE A DA BEE” “I'M SCARED OF BEES” “oh okay” “Why do they keep taking the plank” “I don’t know tubbo just takes it and y/n follows” you both finished rather quickly and neither of you got injured or fell “really good job you two” “thank you Mr military” you stood leaning on tubbo watching George pick up random rocks and put them into his pocket similar to what you had been doing the entire way around the course “I don’t think George or y/n have been outside before they keep picking things up like souvenirs” “Y/N GEORGE HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN THE RAIN BEFORE” both of you just stared at Tommy making him laugh you helped the others get across the tires and even helped prevent Tommy from falling a couple of times. unfortunately, you ended up twisting your ankle but tried to ignore it not wanting to ruin the vlog for anyone, not that you would have, however it was clear you were in pain as you had started limping. one at a time you all crossed the rope “This is me climbing I am climbing” you cheered everybody on and then it was your turn

unlike the others the rope kept shaking as you walked across mainly because you were scared of falling and in pain all whilst trying to rush, this was clearly your least favourite obstacle of the day “take your time y/n don’t fall” “thank you jack I'm trying my best I promise” once at the end of the rope, Tommy took the wheel off you and helped you get down and pulled you into a quick side hug “you’re doing great let’s go we’re almost done” you knew your friends wouldn’t make you continue if you really didn’t want to however you were nearly finished and was determined to finish. you all reassembled the canon and made your way to the next obstacle

“there’s no way we’re getting through that without twanging a rope” “good luck” you and tubbo made your way through the ropes trying not to hit them, this proved to be a pretty impossible task and you ended up twanging the ropes several times, this mixed with everyone else’s failure to cross without hitting the rope meant you all had to do 20 push-ups, after reassembling the canon twice as you all didn’t do it correctly the first time and testing it you all had to do the push-ups “I’m sure y/n and George only did 3” “sorry bossman”

you all were finally making your way to the last obstacle determined to finish “Big Russ can we go to McDonald's after this” “sure” the five of you cheered and ran the last obstacle quickly disassembling the canon, you led the way over the obstacle tubbo Tommy jack and George following behind you, despite tubbo losing his shoe and George going backwards the five of you quickly completed the obstacle and reassembled and tested the canon running over to the finishing line

you all finally completed it and waited for your result “45 minutes easily” “1 hour 11 minutes and 46 seconds” “no way that’s a world record” “well we tried” the five of you stood telling people to subscribe before ending the recording and making your way back to the car

the car ride back felt a lot longer than the way there. you were all exhausted

“how’s your ankle” “it’s not too bad it’ll probably hurt more tomorrow morning”

“I'm still not over Tommy trying to kill me and tubbo” “I didn’t try to kill you” “sure” the rest of the journey was chaos you all screamed along to the songs on the radio eventually you all got to McDonald's and spent the rest of the night enjoying each other’s company.

taglist

@l0ver0fj0y @c1loudee

#mcyt x reader #mcyt fanfiction #mcyt imagines #mcyt imagine #mcyt fluff #tommyinnit x you #tommyinnit x y/n #tommyinnit fluff #tommyinnit imagine #tommyinnit x reader #tubbo x you #tubbo x y/n #tubbo fluff #tubbo imagine #tubbo x reader #jack manifold x you #jack manifold x y/n #jack manifold fluff #jack manifold imagine #jack manifold x reader

[oro-e-diamanti]

Quiet Music: Capriccio (Chapter 4)

In collaboration with @bethanysnow whose ask box is always open for questions, comments, and anything else about this story as well!

Catching the small flames of romance, starting to get turned on higher. They have a tour to do, right? Not spend all their time making goo-goo eyes at each other.....unless?

Content | Fluff

Pairing | fem!Reader x Damiano

Word Count | 8274

Taglist | @damianodavide @lizstans @unitermoonshine @its-afucking-mess @ethaneskin @dont-let-me-drown-in-you@vampirtet @lividisuigomiti @juststalking @tabi-toast @ethan-torchio-angelo @cheese-toastie-11 @thewitchinthemountain @ethanesimp @sofckinelectric @man3skin @daddydamiano @finelinejpm @superchrystaldrug @ginny-lily @nientedaridere @rainbowmarta @tiaamberxx @shaunthesheesh @enjcltaire @rocketqueen @aleksanderwh0r3 @dacey0eg @damianodavidhands @megann-duff @teatrodellavita @solasullabarca @fanfictionandfluff @makapaka11 @slave4yourlove @geklutst-ei @bookish0918 @mehrmonga @kanevill @butterfly-skinnylegend @lidiyabest @ccweasley @bluscryn @deluxeplanteater @ohtorchio @bidet-and-legolas @maybanksslut @katyldamusic @fedorable-killjoys

***

"Thomas," Y/n stared down as he entered the bus. "When I gave you my personal number it was meant for emergencies, not you texting me because you forgot what "sempiternal" means in the middle of the night. What were you reading anyway?!"

"Nothing." Thomas looked up at her from where he was sitting, wide eyes, feigning innocence.

Y/n shook her head, not believing the guitarist and his horrible poker face, but not being bothered enough to question him any further either. “Well, next time you have a question like that in the middle of the night, ask google instead.” She gave him a warm smile and a little pat on the head as she passed him by, moving down the hallway of the tour bus.

It had become a routine for her to stop at the stove first, starting the coffee for everyone, then having a look around as she was waiting for it to boil. Damiano was slumped over on a couch, his head in his hand and still half asleep. She wondered how little rest he had gotten last night, after meeting him out on the balcony at 2 am.

Had he stayed awake for hours, like she had? Had he been thinking about her, the way she had been thinking about him? He had flirted quite heavily last night and she wasn’t sure whether to attribute it to his sleepiness, or if he had meant it at all. She wasn’t quite sure what she was hoping for either. He was insanely attractive, and the attention he gave her made her heart beat in ways no other man had managed to do before. But this wasn’t the time or situation to turn into a bundle of nerves because of a boy.

Even if her brain had decided to play fantasies of him storming into her hotel room last night. Demanding to kiss her. Holding her face in his hands. Looking at her with those dark, hazel eyes, like she was the only person in the world. Probably smelling of sleep and cigarettes and all that made him inherently Damiano. She knew the smell well, it had been haunting her all throughout this whole fucking tour. But the fantasies kept coming, imagining him in love with her, even if she never truly believed in it. It was a nice idea, nothing more.

The sharp hiss of the coffee pot pulled her out of his thoughts and woke up Damiano from his half-slumber. Tired eyes trying to make out the source of the noise, smiling slightly when realising that caffeine was coming his way. Y/n quickly moved to get his cup ready, preparing it the way she had already learned he preferred. He readily held out his hand for the beverage, fingers briefly touching. She almost dropped it as sparks ran through her. She wasn’t sure if he had felt the same or simply hid it better. But as soon as the cup was safely in his hands, she turned back around. Back to the stove to take a deep breath and continue her morning routine.

I need to get over myself. This is a job. Getting fluttery over your boss is not gonna help get the job done. Ignore him. He didn’t feel anything. You need to work. Not imagine something that is never gonna happen. It's not gonna happen, Y/n.

She made quick work depositing the other mugs to Victoria and Thomas, before finding Ethan in the very back of the bus. Drum sticks in hands and absentmindedly tapping a beat on the table in front of him.

“Coffee?”

“Yeah, thank you,” he answered, absentmindedly. “Hey, Y/n, does this sound good to you?”

Ethan started to play out a beat, effectively ignoring the cup that had been placed on the table, as she sat down beside him to listen.

“I’m no musician, but it certainly sounds good to my ears!”

Ethan gave her a proud smile, putting his drumsticks to the side for a second to take a sip from his drink. Y/n, grabbed them immediately, beating randomly on the table.

“You know what? I may have to take you up on your offer of teaching me to play. Love how you guys always have stuff around, you’re just constantly thinking about music. I wish I knew how to play," she sighed.

“I can show you a bit of drumming right now, if you’d like?” He offered. “Just a bit of a rhythm on the table right here.”

He moved closer to her, taking her hands in his as she kept holding onto the sticks and tried to get her to play a little, easy beat, but the angle was awkward and her wrist was bent too much to properly tap along.

“Okay, this isn’t working,” he laughed. “Would you mind, um, moving between my legs?”

Y/n could feel another blush coming on. It may be just Ethan, but it IS Ethan and Ethan sure is pretty. She studied his face, unassuming, nothing but a welcoming smile. But she felt odd. She had only been working for this band for a few days, yet she’d already grown closer to them than any other client she had worked with before. Normally she’d do her job, get a quick thank you on the way out, and then just retire somewhere. Do uni work, wait for further instructions. This whole thing was new and as much as she was enjoying it, she wasn’t sure if she was crossing lines she shouldn’t as a personal assistant. Then again, what was the harm in a little lesson? It wasn’t like there was anything else to it. This wasn’t him trying to flirt with her, this was him trying to be a friend. She could do with a friend.

With a quick nod, she moved and sat down on the floor in front of Ethan. Nestling between his legs as he held her hand. Helping her get into position before backing up a little to give her more space. Grabbing her hands again with the sticks to demonstrate how she was supposed to hold and then hit the table. He leaned over her to watch what she was doing. She understood quickly, getting the hang of it and before she knew it Ethan had let go of her hands as she was successfully keeping the rhythm going.

“See? Natural talent,” he laughed behind her.

Neither of them had noticed Damiano walk down the corridor towards them until he stopped in the doorway.

“Ah, Dami! Look what Ethan taught me!” Y/n starts repeating the little rhythm with the biggest smile on her face, proud of herself and what she’d learned in such a short time. Ethan leant back, watching her with a smile.

“Good job, Y/n. Keep going and you might replace Edgar soon,” Damiano said, ducking into the bathroom with a laugh.

Y/n watched him disappear. Her heart fluttered as he left her sight. If he could just not be my boss, that’d be fucking great…

She stood back up to sit next to Ethan on the couch, shaking the thought off. “I see why you like drumming, it’s fun.”

“Thank you, I think so too. You enjoy being our assistant, by the way?” Ethan asked, looking at her inquisitively while finally continuing to drink his coffee.

“Actually, yes. Best job I have ever taken. I know your manager is an absolutely wonderful woman. Didn’t know she planned this position for me originally though, kinda scared me to be honest.”

“Are we scary?”

“No, no. You’re all lovely. You are the biggest group I’ve worked for so far, so there’s that. But…” Y/n moved to sit on her leg now, leaning closer to Ethan, starting to feel more comfortable around him. “You four are indescribably amazing people. My mum would probably call you ‘people after God’s heart’,” she imitated her mother’s Northern accent, making Ethan laugh.

“Shocking, I know, that we’re normal!”

Y/n smacked his chest.

“No! You are far better than anyone- no one on this bus is ‘normal’.”

“Even the driver?”

“Especially the driver.”

***

Damiano hadn’t meant to listen in, but standing behind the slightly closed door of the restroom, he couldn’t help himself, even if it was killing him. Ethan and Y/n would probably be really good for each other… The thought flashed through him. No. It wouldn’t happen. Not under his watch.

Last night had been a blessing and a curse. After finishing his smoke, he had stood out on the balcony for a little longer, imagining the conversations they would have been having if she had stayed out with him. Under the moonlight. Måneskin. Her hair down, she would probably go get another glass of wine. Coming back out to see him.

“What about you, amore mio? Working on more Shakespeare?”

“Yes. Always. I work hard for things I want, you know me. All work no play makes Y/n a happy girl,” she would snicker into her wine glass.

“What if I wanted you. What would I have to do? Never been shy about ... hard… work, either…”

“Why don’t you come and find out, the door is unlocked…”

With a heavy sigh, he moved to the sink to splash some water on his face, raking it through his hair. It was only early in the morning, he didn’t need to unscrew his head just yet. She was just a girl. Just some girl that worked for them. There were so many people on the team, she was simply one of them. But she was also a woman, with wants and needs and desires, and oh, how he would love to attend to every single one of them… Maybe I could be a need for her, for the beautiful woman just one room over. He screamed internally. He was done for.

***

By the time Y/n left Ethan to his coffee, Damiano was back on the couch with a pen and paper, gears visibly turning in his head. He didn’t even look up when she entered. See, just a guy, Y/n thought. Victoria was busy bickering with the driver about wanting to stop at a service station within the next hour. Thomas was scrolling through his phone absent-mindedly.

As soon as Vic had finished her conversation, she walked over to where Y/n was sitting, letting herself drop onto the seat next to her heavily, laying her head on her shoulder. “Y/n I want snacks.”

“I bought snacks, they’re in the cupboard.”

“But, fun snacks! Like you,” the bassist winked.

“As much as I love the compliment, Victoria, I am sure the driver will take us to the next petrol station after hearing your plea.” She kissed the top of the blonde’s head. “You can survive a little longer without sugary snacks.”

Victoria looked up at her with big blue eyes, wrapping her arms around the assistant. “But what if I can’t, Y/n,” she whined, pulling a dramatic pose. “What if I waste away without fun snacks.”

“Vic, love, nothing here will make you die because you haven’t had food. I provided all of you with breakfast - it was your decision to let Thomas eat yours.”

“And I don’t regret a thing!” Thomas shouted from his seat, all three of them breaking out into laughter. Y/n grinned, eyes falling back onto some of the papers in front of her, ready to get back into work. Victoria’s arm looped around Y/n’s as she snuggled into her shoulder with a pitiful sigh.

***

Goddamnit, not her, too.

Damiano had meant to start writing some more, lyrics and words and images flowing through his head in a chaos that needed to be tamed by pen and paper. But as soon as he had sat down Victoria had started moaning about snacks and her little interaction with Y/n had taken up all of the brain space the lyrics should have. His eyes kept focusing on the closeness between the two of them. The way Vic leant her head on Y/n’s shoulder, the way she in turn kissed the bassist’s head. So far he had only considered Ethan to be a concern. But now the thought of Victoria herself meddling was increasingly growing. So she might have had a boyfriend but that had been, what? Years ago? She had said? And the guy had been a dick. What if she’d just given up on men completely, deciding to exclusively date girls from now on? Fuck.

Staring at the way Victoria was now cuddling her, his thoughts ran wild. Was this still friendly? Was the smile she was giving Vic flirty? Maybe she hadn’t been returning his flirtations the way he’d been hoping because it was Vic she was interested in, not him?

Dwelling on these thoughts wasn’t going to help. Jealousy, envy, insecurity… as interesting as they would be as drag names, they weren’t going to solve the issue. Damiano felt stuck. Making heart eyes at a girl who was three feet away while she was none the wiser. Yet it was Victoria latching onto her arm. He wasn’t surprised. She was gorgeous, and funny, and cared about people. And Vic had a lot of good qualities he himself didn’t possess. Maybe it’s the boobs? His brain mused, but he shook it off. That wasn’t it, he was sure of it.

***

Victoria studies Damiano. His face would have been unreadable to anyone else, obviously lost in his thought. But she knew him well enough to understand that the look on his face was one of insecurity and upset. Not necessarily at anything in particular, just upset. Her eyes softened. Raising a brow at the singer. He simply shrugged, shaking his head, then taking the notebook he was carrying everywhere. Opening it up, staring at the words written there, but not adding anything. Yet his eyes never stopped flicking away to everyone else around him, obviously restless. What was up with him? If there was one thing Victoria hated it was one of her friends feeling off and her not being able to do anything about it. But she knew Damiano, and she knew it could be hard to get him to budge if he didn’t want to talk.

As their eyes met once more, she took the chance to mouth at him, “You alright?”

His eyes flashed at Y/n for a split second, he probably hadn’t even noticed it himself, before nodding with a tight-lipped smile, then looking back down at his pages. That was when it finally clicked in Victoria’s mind. It was about her. And from the looks he kept secretly giving her, the problem wasn’t dislike.

***

“SNACKS!” Victoria and Thomas all but yelled as the bus pulled into the parking lot of a little petrol station. The band ran out of the bus, stumbling over each other like a hoard of kindergartners, and Y/n couldn’t help but smirk at their behaviour. Following them in a much more composed manner.

By the time she entered the shop, all four members of the band had dispersed into different corners. Trying to figure out what to buy. Damiano was holding up two chocolate bars, obviously trying to decipher what the difference was with no knowledge of Swedish whatsoever, before shrugging his shoulders and taking both.

Y/n was still in the doorway, grabbing a basket and consulting a little list on her phone. As much as she loved to let them run wild, she would not completely have them overdose on sugar. No matter how much they wanted to. She still felt responsible for their wellbeing, even on their days off. Juice felt like a sensible choice.

Suddenly, she saw a hand appear from behind her, casually taking out some orange juice from her basket. She turned around in surprise, only to be faced with Thomas looking at her with wide eyes, obviously feeling caught.

“No healthy stuff from the petrol station!” He suddenly shouted, grabbing her whole basket now and running away with it.

“Thomas!” She flew after him before she knew what she was doing, almost running over Ethan as she chased the guitarist through the little store. With not much space available, they ended up going round and round one of the shelves, until Thomas unceremoniously crashed into a cooler when he didn’t manage to take a turn in time. Trying to bite back a smile, Y/n walked over, breathlessly asking him if he was alright, as laughter still bubbled out of her. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed Victoria, giggling away, phone pointed towards them.

“Oh no, you’re not putting that on the internet!” Y/n pointed a finger at her in what she hoped was an authoritative gesture, but Victoria wasn’t impressed.

“Too late!” She squealed as she skipped away, out of reach, to pay for whatever she had picked out.

Thomas had gotten back up on his feet in the meantime, contents of the basket still spilled all around him, sporting a pout.

“Stop it with that face,” Y/n scolded, but she couldn’t keep the smile at bay. “Go pick out your favourite snack, you can add it to my basket.”

Thomas happily skipped away as Y/n quickly picked up the mess, then moved to another aisle finding Damiano there. He seemed to be debating over the crisps now, having moved on from the chocolate bars.

She stood to the side, her eyes flashing over him a couple more times than necessary. He was just too pretty. It was simply impossible to look away. Even now, no fancy clothes, no stage makeup, no grand performance, he was mesmerising.

Her brain couldn’t help itself, images and ideas flashing in front of her eyes. Going to a petrol station on road trips with their future kids. Them bouncing around, chasing each other over a candy bar. Her and Damiano trying to get them not to cause a mess, slightly annoyed, but always laughing along with them.

She looked at him again. In a blink, the daydream changed.

It’s past midnight. He’s in the same sweatshirt he’s wearing right now. Her arms wrapped around his torso. Looking up at that beautiful face of his. Him picking up condoms from the health section. Winking at her with that certain glint in his eyes. Smacking her arse on the way to the cashier. Filled with giggles and flirtatious glances and knowing what the night ahead would entail. The anticipation crackling around them.

Oh, to be that girl. The girl he looks at with lustful eyes. The one he wasn't to make a baby with. Not the one to be ashamed of.

***

Damiano had chosen what kind of crisps to buy long ago. He simply was too busy staring back at Y/n, who seemed to be lost in thought. Eyes focused on him, yet apparently not noticing him looking back. He could basically see the gears in her head turning, mouth slightly open, far away in her mind.

Whatever enraptured that beautiful mind of hers… He wanted to know - could he be that very thing someday? Be so involved in her thoughts that it caused her to finally slow down? Get her to relax. He kept daydreaming about the massage he had given her the other day. How she had melted into his touch. He wanted that again. But more. He wanted her sighs and her moans as he worked her body in any way she would let him. Hell, he’d be her personal roadie if she wanted.

Fuck, he was smitten. She was always so strong-willed, so passionate. That night on the balcony had done nothing to help his fantasies. Her teaching him how to dance? Bodies close to each other, breathing the same air… Whatever perfume she used, he wanted to drown in it.

***

Victoria had been on the way back out, snacks acquired, Instagram story uploaded, and ready to head back to the bus for the last two hours of the ride. However, she stopped dead in her tracks when Y/n and Damiano caught her eye. Both of them were staring at the other, yet neither seemed to realise it. Just lost in their own worlds. Vic frowned, not oblivious to the dreamy look on Y/n’s face or the way Damiano’s eyes kept flicking up and down their assistant’s body. Something was definitely going on here and she was determined to find out what exactly it was.

After Y/n had finally moved again, paying for the snacks, Victoria caught up with her outside the shop. Their driver was having a smoke, surely had more than enough time left for a little talk.

“Y/n, wait up,” Vic quickly jogged up to her, taking the shopping bag out of her hand and carrying it into the bus ahead of her.. “Let me help you.”

She was counting on the guys to be staying outside for a little longer, probably lighting up a cigarette each as soon as they were done snack-shopping.

“So…” She started, putting away the snacks alongside Y/n. “Saw you staring at Damiano in there.”

Great, this wasn’t subtle at all, she scowled at herself. Tact had never been her strong suit in these situations. She was far more likely to rush into a conversation, head first, too open, too honest, too soon.

“I- uh- I don’t know what you mean. I was probably just staring off into space.”

Okay, she was getting flustered. Victoria knew she was onto something here, but it wouldn’t be easy to get anything out of Y/n. She was way too professional and… uptight for that. And they didn’t exactly have any red wine on tap to get her to open up.

“You know, there’s no harm in it. He’s a very attractive man,” she said, playfully nudging Y/n’s side. “Pretty sure everyone’s had the hots for him at some point.”

“Well I haven’t, it's very unprofessional.” Y/n stubbornly replied and Victoria almost laughed out loud.

Sure, she hadn’t. That’s why she was staring at him like he was a drink of water in the middle of a desert. Or why she was getting all flustered every time he touched her. Or why she always seemed to gravitate towards him, whatever she was doing. But that wasn’t what Vic was going to say. It wouldn’t get them anywhere. She had learned that much about Y/n.

“All my friends used to have a crush on him in school,” Vic laughed, remembering their beginnings. “They’d just hang out whenever we were rehearsing, making heart eyes at him and complimenting his every move, but he never cared. He never even looked at them, just giving them a polite hello. Never paid them any attention because he was way too focused on the music we were making. He’s always been like that. Music has always come first. It’s why I think it’s so peculiar how interested he is in you.”

If Y/n had been flustered before, she was full-on blushing now, rapidly opening a random cabinet to hide her face, but Victoria had seen. Her eyes got wide, as if she had been struck by lightning.

“He’s not interested in me, don’t be silly. I work for him just as I work for you and we all get along. Nothing is going to happen if that is what you are worried about. I would never jeopardize the tour or our friendship. He doesn’t even see me like that, anyway, so it’s fine. It’s not like I’m his type, and like, I mean-”

“Hey,” Victoria turned more serious now. As much as she enjoyed teasing her new friend, she felt like she needed to let her know that she wasn’t kidding in this case. She put a tentative hand on her shoulder. Having the other turn around to have Y/n face her. “I’m serious though. I know it’s early days, but if you feel something for him? I’m not going to stop you. Neither is anyone else on this tour. He’s a great guy. And I’ll personally punch him if he isn’t. And I think you’re great Y/n. You deserve good things.”

For a second, Victoria could see a flicker of Y/n’s softer side, of her vulnerability. She felt compelled to pull her into a hug, but she feared making her uncomfortable, so instead, she simply pretended she hadn’t seen. Just like she pretended not to hear Y/n’s voice breaking just the tiniest bit when she said, “Thank you.”

***

The old town of Malmö was full of cobblestone, canals, and adorable old houses. When Y/n led them into the restaurant she had reserved for the evening, Damiano made sure to ask for a table by the window, enamoured by what looked to be the main square of the town and the people hurrying along. As he turned back towards the table, he noticed Y/n with a similar look on her face. Chin held up by her hand as she leaned on the table, watching the world pass by outside. A serene smile played on her face and he feared he was mirroring her expression when Victoria kicked his foot from under the table. Giving him a knowing smile and a raised brow. He shook his head, quickly grasping the menu to distract himself.

“Oooh happy hour!” Victoria squealed. “First round of cocktails is on me!”

Damiano almost let out a sigh - knowing fully well that when it came to an evening like this, they would not stop at a round or two. He was to be proven right.

About two hours later, the sun was on the verge of setting. There was a nice buzz going on, dinner eaten, while the drinks kept coming. Thomas was retelling a story Damiano had heard about a hundred times. Excitedly waving his hands around he only just managed to grasp one of the glasses before the guitarist knocked it over. Y/n was listening attentively - the only one out of the bunch to not have heard Thomas’ retelling before. Damiano couldn’t help but notice how her cheeks were slightly flushed, a sure sign that she’d had a drink. He thought she looked adorable. She’d look just as adorable under me. He quickly put the thought away, blaming it on the alcohol he had consumed. Apart from Y/n - who had been responsible enough to switch back and forth between cocktails and water - they were all on the edge of being drunk, laughing too loudly, talking too excitedly, being a little too affectionate.

It’s what he blamed his behaviour on, when he found his foot searching for hers under the table. Giving her just the slightest, playful kick to get her attention. She looked at him immediately, raised eyebrows, obviously wondering if he had touched her by mistake. So this time, he fully smirked, holding eye contact, as he nudged her again. A timid smile appeared on her face and he was convinced that she would be awkward. Pulling back, possibly scolding him any other time. But her slightly intoxicated state seemed to leave her more open to his teasing. He barely believed it when she nudged him back. Maybe we’re actually getting somewhere here.

“Um, excuse me?”

The whole table looked up at once at the timid voice. Only to find two young girls awkwardly and uncomfortable standing next to them, faces as red as tomatoes and eyes wide.

“Are you Måneskin?”

“We are, actually!” Victoria beamed, immediately getting up. “Do you guys want some pictures?”

The girls didn’t seem to manage anything but hectic nods, too excited and overwhelmed. Damiano smiled. It didn’t matter how big they were getting - having people coming up to them to ask for photos, so obviously in love with them. Still made his heart beat like crazy. He’d do anything for the fans.

Quickly, getting up from his chair as well, he pulled the other two along with him, taking a few photos with the two, exchanging some words and thanking them for their support. Looking back at Y/n, he noticed she was getting a bit nervous.

“Guys, we should probably move back to the hotel now,” she said and it was only then that he took a look around and saw the amount of people staring. Talking and pointing phones at them. It was obvious none of them were actual fans - just hoping to get a glimpse of something to put on their social media. Damiano nodded, rounding up the rest of his band and leading them out of the restaurant, ready to call for a taxi as Y/n went to settle the tab and then followed them outside mere seconds later.

“Right let’s get you back to the hotel,” Y/n decided as they finally managed to flag down a taxi. “But don’t worry, the night’s not over yet - bring your swimsuits, I’ve got a little surprise for you.”

***

Y/n was perched on a little tiled bench, laptop with work opened at her side. A bluetooth speaker ready nearby. She’d slipped the girl at the reception a little money and a signed picture of the band, which she had gratefully taken, to make sure they’d have the hotel pool to themselves that night. Y/n was aware that the band tended to really enjoy a nice dip in the water and she was determined she’d get them to let loose and relax a bit before more gigs were coming their way.

She didn’t notice that everyone had arrived until a flash of blond ran past her and jumped into a pool with a massive splash. It shouldn’t have been a surprise that Thomas would announce his presence like this. She still flinched for a second. Ethan followed not much later, with Victoria opting for the stairs ‘for hair-related reasons’ and Damiano pushing her in anyways. Following swiftly himself, as she grabbed his hand as she was falling. Y/n shook her head, amused at the four, and turned on some music as she watched them.

She couldn’t help but smile at the way they all acted like little kids on a pool day. But behaviour was one thing - the way they looked was quite another. Water was running down their bodies… okay, one body in particular. She would be lying if she said that Damiano swimming around in nothing but his little shorts wasn’t… well, breathtaking. Tattoos on full display, hair wet, glistening skin. He was smiling, laughing, trying to outswim Thomas. The way his physique moved through the water… He was in formidable shape. What she would give to be manhandled by this man.

Him pinning her to a wall, smirking, looking down at her like he was going to eat her. He rightfully just might. Telling her all the dirty thoughts he had when on stage. Making her look away in a blush, but grabbing her face. Tsk-ing, ‘no, no, no, good girls look at who is speaking to them’.

But no. Work called her name, just loudly enough to pull her out of her fantasy.

***

Opening the laptop, she immediately seemed to get immersed in her work. Damiano watched her with a frown on his face. This was so like her - making sure everyone else got taken care of and was having a good time, only to withdraw and bury her in her work again. He wished she’d take more breaks to just enjoy.

Every now and then she looked away from the screen, watching what everyone else was doing and contently smiling to herself. He couldn’t help imagining her watching over him the same way with their kids. His head was running away with the idea.

Him splashing around with the children. Her watching over them, staying on the sidelines, smiling the way she was now. Making sure everyone was safe and happy. Snacks in hand. Their daughter climbing out of the water, running over to her. The way her eyes would light up, arms open wide, not caring about getting wet as she hugged her. He knew she’d be the most perfect mum, just from looking at her. Nothing had ever been as obvious to him.

A splash of water over his head pulled him out of his thoughts. Apparently, Ethan had caught him staring. He shrugged it off.

“Y/n! Come swim with us!” Victoria called, moving to the edge of the pool. The assistant did nothing but raise a brow at the request, shaking her head.

“You kids go have fun,” she laughed. “I’m fine here, doing a bit of work. Just because you got a day off, doesn’t mean I do too!”

“Ah, you’re no fun, Y/n. One night won’t kill you,” Thomas groaned, diving back under the water.

“Well, I didn’t even bring my swimsuit, so it’s out of the question anyway. Now let me do some work.” She tried to sound strict but the giggle bubbled in her voice anyway, still tiny traces of intoxication in her speech. Damiano grinned at the thought of her still being tipsy, slightly wondering if it’d give him the chance to get her to let her guard down the way she had done the night before.

“Oh, rubbish, you party pooper!” Vic shouted back. “Your underwear will do just fine, it’s not like anyone is here to tell you off.”

Y/n shot a look at Victoria. A blush that definitely wasn’t caused by alcohol crept onto her face.

“I’m alright, you have fun.”

Damiano’s head spun, looking at Y/n sitting on the bench. The sheer idea of her joining them like that? Potentially seeing her undress? He was more than glad the water was hiding the lower half of his body.

“Get over here now or we’re dragging you in!” Thomas threatened, already halfway through heaving himself out of the water.

Oh, no way I’m getting out of the water right now, not like this.

“Oh fine! Fine, fine. If it will make you all stop worrying about me ‘not having fun’,” she laughed.” She rolled her trousers up as she moved to the edge of the pool, kicked off her shoes, and let her legs dangle in the water as she sat down. “Happy?”

“For now,” Vic laughed. “But don’t think you’ll always get out of things this easily!”

“Oh come on guys, leave her be.” Ethan decided to be the voice of reason once again. He swam up to her, hair all piled on top of his head in a bun. “Sorry about them - they don’t know when to quit.”

Y/n giggled at his comment.

“It’s cool, nice seeing everyone have a good time though.” Y/n tilted her head for a moment, looking at Ethan. Slowly she raised a hand to hold his face still, the other hand pulling something out of his hair. “There you go. Can’t have fuzz in those luscious locks of yours!”

A scowl appeared on Damiano’s face. He knew he shouldn’t be feeling like this, but the way she was looking at Ethan right now, that soft touch, made all the fantasies in his head shatter for a moment. Why wasn’t she fixing his hair instead. Fuck, he was being stupid. His attention was drawn away from the pair as a loud squeal escaped Victoria, who was currently being wrestled in the water by Thomas.

“Don’t you dare dunk me!”

Damiano didn’t even have to watch to know what happened next. A second later, a spluttering Vic emerged, a murderous look in her eye as she dunked Thomas in return. Their little fight turned chaotic, ending with the top of her bikini slowly floating away from her.

“Aw Vic, do you always have to be topless?!” Thomas laughed loudly.

“You dick! You untied it!”

Y/n instantly covered her eyes, avoiding Victoria’s half-naked body at all costs, looking down at her lap.

“Um - maybe someone should, uh, give her her top back?” She stammered.

Vic looked at the blushing girl, a smirk growing on her face as she whispered something at Thomas, pointing at Y/n, obviously hatching a plan. She swam up to their friend, gently grabbing her legs under the water.

“You are the only one that seems to mind, amore… Do you not like my tits?” Victoria teased, cocking her head to the side as she tried to catch Y/n’s eyes.

“No! No, I mean- That’s not what I mean. Um… I don’t know - is it just me or is it hot in here?” Y/n was a mess, tripping over her words.

“The only one that’s hot here is you, Y/n,” Thomas grinned, swimming off to retrieve Vic’s top, which he handed to her as he came back. The blonde held it up to her boobs in a fake-clumsy way, big eyes looking up at Y/n.

“Oh, I think I’m going to need your help with this, Y/n. Mind tying me up?”

Y/n looked like she was about to explode, her face once again covered in a deep red. With slightly shaking fingers, she moved forwards as Vic turned her back towards her, fumbling with the strings around her neck and her back to tie them up.

“Thanks, babe, you’re a doll!” Victoria grinned, taking the assistant’s hand and leaving a little kiss on her knuckles. It was the point at which Damiano decided he’d definitely need to protect her from his bandmates. If anything, it was his time to bother Y/n now.

As Damiano swam over, Y/n was still bright red. Her head was still lowered, picking at her nail polish, as she squeaked out a “hi”. You’ve got to put on the charm now, you can do it, he said in his head, hyping himself up as he looked back at her. He didn’t want to bring her into even more of an awkward situation, but his hands were on her legs before he even noticed, slightly stroking along the curve of her calves under the water.

“Don’t mind those fools,” he told her in a voice low enough that they wouldn’t hear. “They’re just trying to rile you up because they like seeing you blush. It is a nice sight, to be fair. Seeing you blush.”

“Well, it’s not like I have control over that. Um. Y-you look cool… I mean - good. You know? … fucking hell.” She buried her face in her hands, stifling a flustered chuckle. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me today. I apologise, I will just hide now, forever.”

Yet, the smile on her face hadn’t left since Damiano had arrived. She bit her lip nervously, looking at the singer. Staring at him, maybe trying to figure out what his intentions were. He wished he knew. “Your, uh… eyes… they’re pretty.”

“Don’t even think about ever hiding that face from me, yeah?” He pulled her hands back down as she once again attempted to cover herself. He briefly forgot his hands were wet, until she giggled and patted her own dry on her shirt as he let go. “Your eyes are really pretty too, Y/n, so don’t deprive me of them.”

She blinked a couple of times, taken aback by what he had said. “Alright, I can do that.” She barely noticed they were holding hands. Rubbing her thumb over his skin softly, keeping herself grounded in place by the heat his body gave off under the water. “You just gotta step in when they start taking the piss again, yeah?”

He moved in closer now, only letting go of her hands to grasp onto her thighs, trying to keep himself above water. He was desperate to move between her legs, but he wasn’t going to ruin the moment by taking it too far. Not yet. “Of course. But amore mio, what if I wanted to, uh, ‘take the piss’?”

She smirked. “Oh! Then that’s fine.”

Damiano was sure his heart wasn’t even beating anymore, it was fluttering. There was something about her… every time he watched her, talked to her, he felt like he was looking at her for the first time. Finding a new side to her. He wanted more, constantly craving to get closer, and in moments like these. When she let him in just a little bit, made him feel like he was just one small step above the others, he felt like it was all going to be worth it. The slow way he was working himself into her heart.

“Y/N HAS A TATTOO ON HER ANKLE!” Thomas suddenly shouted, popping out of the water and pointing at the assistant. Damiano was pushed out of the way by Victoria, who grabbed Y/n’s leg. Hoisting it up in the air, turning it to show her ankle. A black outlined hand giving the middle finger with long black nails stared back at the band.

“That is really pretty,” Ethan said softly, but Victoria scoffed

“Pretty? It’s fucking cool! See,” she turned back to Y/n, “you are rock ‘n’ roll!”

Damiano stared at the little drawing on her leg, fascinated to have found yet another side to her he hadn’t seen coming. He wondered if she would let him tattoo her one day, letting him grab her leg, smoothing over the skin, putting that kind of trust in him. He was determined to find out, sooner or later.

“I mean... you think you’re the only ones with tattoos?” Y/n smirked, almost in a cocky way. It was a good look on her. “That one hurt like a bitch-”

“That one?” Damiano threw in. “Does that mean there’s more?”

Looking over at him, she simply smiled, shaking her head. “Anyway, it’s late, we should be going to bed soon. I know - I’m not trying to parent you, but somebody’s gotta be responsible here!” She stood up, fixing her trousers, putting her shoes back on, and grabbing towels to pass around. “Come on, out of the pool. Comply and I will get you something special with your coffee tomorrow!”

***

After everyone had retired to their rooms, Victoria decided she needed another talk. Moving along the hotel corridor, she stopped in front of Damiano’s door, softly knocking. He opened hastily, his face dropping ever so slightly as he saw her.

“Not who you were expecting?” She asked with a smirk as she pushed past him into the room. She was glad they’d all gotten their own rooms for the night and didn’t have to share - no need to involve Ethan or Thomas in the little conversation she was aiming to have with Damiano. Victoria dropped down onto the bed, kicking her shoes off and getting comfortable, as the singer followed.

“What can I do for you?” Damiano asked, shutting the door behind her.

“How about explaining why you were all over Y/n in the pool?” A grin spread on her face. She knew she’d have to be much less careful with Damiano than she had been in the conversation with Y/n, but still needed him to know this was good-natured teasing. “Pretty touchy, if you ask me.”

“Well, we were talking. Don’t need to tell you everything I do.” He flopped onto the bed, grabbing a pillow to smother his face into. “Why?”

“Yes you do, I’m one of your best friends!” She didn’t hesitate in grabbing the second pillow to whack him over the head, before putting it back behind herself to lean against. “Just interested to know what you think of her. You know, because I’m your friend and I care. And I’m nosey, so spill.”

He started groaning into the pillow.

“If I told you I think I like her, would you shut up about it?” He turned his head to the side to look at the blonde. “I don’t know, Vic, she walked into our lives and…” His eyes grew distant as he thought about her.

“Wait, you actually like like her? I was thinking you were just attracted, you know the thrill of the chase and all that. Fuck, Damiano!” Her smile came back tenfold. “I love this!”

He shot up from his lying position. “No! No, you don’t love this! I don’t love this! I have no fucking clue what I’m doing! She is so sweet and kind and sensitive and I can’t stop thinking about her, it’s turning me into a brain-dead zombie. I could never actually win her over, I fuck up so much and- … I talk too much don’t I?”

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you so flustered!” Victoria remarked in amazement. “You’re actually, properly, crushing on her! You should tell her.” She almost added if only for my amusement but decided against it. This was obviously tormenting him already, no need for her to rub it in.

“I’m not gonna tell her shit! She’s our assistant, for god’s sake. I already could be in so much trouble if she took something I said wrong. I could fall flat on my face and- … Vic, I know that you care and you want me to be happy. Which I love and appreciate. We are best friends, we really are. I would do the same thing if you had a crush on someone, but I just don’t know what to do,” he moans, falling back onto the bed. “I haven’t been like this since school.”

Victoria patted his head in sympathy as he buried his face back into the pillow. She wasn’t quite sure what to advise him in this situation. Sure, she would love to see her friend happy. And there was definitely something cooking under the surface of Y/n’s feelings. And, honestly, the thought of the two of them together? She was basically swooning at the thought. But she also knew it wasn’t her place to meddle. Right?

“I don’t want to make her uncomfortable. I don’t wanna scare her away.” He looked at Victoria with pleading eyes. “Has she talked to you at all? Have you picked up anything from her? Any hints?”

A sigh escaped her lips, but she knew she couldn’t help but give him at least a little push in what she hoped was the right direction. “Look, Damiano. I’m not gonna pretend like I didn’t notice she fancies you. Honestly, no surprise there. But I think we both know she’s not exactly the type to jump right into bed with someone. So take it slow. Show her you care. Woo her.”

“Woo her?! Like an old Italiano romance? I can do that… I think. Okay, what does she like… Y/n, what does she- She doesn’t really talk about herself that much, does she..” Victoria could see the gears turning in his head. “This was so much easier when I wasn’t invested… Why do I have to be invested, Vic?”

He looked at her with dopey eyes, before jumping up and pacing around the room. “Argh! She is making me go insane! I tried writing lyrics, but nothing is working. I just can’t focus when she’s around. She gets this look, especially when talking about her work and language.. At the pool, did you see how she looked at me?”

“You’ve written lyrics?! Now, you really got it bad, my friend,” Victoria shook her head in amusement. “But yes, I did. I told you, she’s interested. Can’t tell you how deep that runs, I’ve only known her for a few days myself and she is working for us, no way to ignore that. So maybe take a step back until you figure this out?”

“Yeah, you’re right. She works for us. That’s… that’s a giant, neon ‘no’.” He stopped walking, looking out of the window. “I need to cool it, don’t I? We’re on tour. What am I doing! We have fans and people who are looking forward to seeing us. We have gigs to play! Fuck.” He sighed, staring off into the distance. “We should probably sleep. No long drive tomorrow, but lots of interviews, right?”

“Don’t get in over your head about this,” she put a reassuring hand on his shoulder. She hadn’t expected this kind of outburst when she had knocked on his door earlier. “It’s the first week of tour. You got three more of seeing her literally every day. Concentrate on the job, then on her, yeah? Now let’s get some sleep. And I mean it - no pondering and smoking all through the night, you gotta rest!”

“You’re right, I don’t know what I was thinking. Thank you.” He pulled Victoria into a hug. “Thank god you’re here. Wouldn’t know what to do. Goodnight.”

She gave him a little wave as she left his room, only just hearing him mumble, “I have music to perform…”

***

As the night grew to a close, Y/n found herself in her own room, snuggling into a pillow. Glad that the next day would leave less free time. Drive to Copenhagen. Get everyone settled it. Maneuver them from interview to interview, although this time around Victoria would be a great help since she knew Danish. Then off to soundcheck, light dinner, the gig, sleep. No time to get lost in silly daydreams for once.

Yet, as sleep slowly crept up on her, she couldn’t help one last thought entering her mind.

I wonder if he is thinking of me.

#maneskin fiction #damiano david fiction #damiano david imagine #damiano david x you #damiano david x reader #maneskin imagine #maneskin x you #fluff #maneskin x reader #mywriting #bethanysnow #quiet music

[giorno-plays-piano]

Blood in the water Part 2

Pairing: merman!Steve Rogers x Reader

Warnings: yandere, obsession, kidnapping, non-consensual drug use, brief mention of breeding, minor depiction of violence.

Words: 3496.

Part 1

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He started singing again, and you turned on Slipknot to the full volume, carefully slipping on your noise-canceling headphones you ordered not so long ago. They were really a blessing, but even with them and all the noise surrounding you Steve’s voice still rang inside your head. 

He had a beautiful voice, the one people would call heavenly, but his intentions were far from angelic: the first night you heard Steve singing to you, you had almost went to the beach where he was waiting his prey, charmed by his divine voice. Forgetting about the danger, you floated like a cloud to him, only half-awake and clearly unaware of your actions. The only thing that saved you that night was a sharp rock you stepped on, cutting your foot, blood coloring the cold ground as you broke free from Steve’s charms. When you ran home, covering your ears and singing loudly to yourself to silence his voice, the merman let out an unnatural, frightening growl behind your back.

Then Steve started doing it every night, serenading you by moonlight. It could be romantic if only the merman didn’t try drowning you in the sea, determined to make you “his mate”. Worse, with each passing day the mark he left on your neck was becoming more and more painful and itchy, and sometimes you were waking up with deep scratches left by your own nails. 

The villagers couldn’t do much about it, despite being deeply ashamed of their inability to tell you about the merfolk - you realized they had been under some curse as every time they tried talking to you about Steve they were simply losing their voices. Of course, it all made sense now. 

They helped you taking care of the wound, but from all the words they couldn’t say you understood you wouldn’t get rid of the mark easily. Thankfully, it stopped bleeding, but the nasty scar left by Steve’s sharp teeth had still been there. Well, you could live with it, you supposed, if only you leave this forsaken place.

When you got on the first bus, you had fainted in the middle of the trip for no damn reason. You looked so bad with you eyes rolling back into your skull, your body shaking uncontrollably, the driver decided not to risk it and returned to the town immediately, leaving you in a hospital again. Strangely, you woke up with no pain whatsoever, fresh as a daisy. It was the curse the merman gifted you - you couldn’t be too far from him now, dragged back by the mark on your neck, and your only chance to stay alive was either staying with him or taking him with you. 

Maybe you could get rid of the curse if you killed him, you weren’t sure. As far as you knew from locals, they didn’t manage to kill even one in the last several decades. You didn’t know whether you could, too. Even if you would get a chance to stab Steve, you hardly imagined murdering him. You just weren’t the type.

So, he kept singing in his attempt to draw you to the beach again, and you kept hiding in that little cottage you rented. Oh yes, you were also worried about the rent since the month you paid for was coming to an end, but locals just smiled at you sadly, shaking their heads. This was how merfolk was attracting new people to the town.

“But my friends and family will be searching for me.” You mumbled, covering your face with your hands. “I have a job, a life out there.”

“I’m sorry, sunny, but no one will be searching for you,” the doctor said, giving you a salve for your mark - it was easing the itchiness. “You don’t know the merfolk. They'd stop at nothing to keep their mates close.”

“But why, for God’s sake?” You growled helplessly, unable to face the man and staring at your shoes instead.

“Reproduction, sunny. Mermaids aren’t as fertile anymore, and they are facing extinction.” He shrugged.

“And how is it supposed to work? Human with a merman?”

The doctor patted your shoulder apologetically, shaking his head. ‘I can’t tell you, dear. I... I physically can’t.”

You knew what he was talking about and couldn’t be angry at him. These people couldn’t do much, forced to protect their loved ones and living in constant fear of being abducted by the vile creatures living deep in the sea. Most of the time merfolk didn’t come to the town openly, and that’s why those women were so upset you lived far away, completely defenseless. But they couldn’t open up to you, revealing merfolk’s secret, and now Steve kept you on the hook.

Groaning when the sunlight crept in through the curtains, you rubbed your eyes and slowly got up, taking the headphones away and touching your ears. God, it hurt so much, but it was the only way for you to sleep at least for a few hours while Steve kept singing outside.

Oddly, you couldn’t hear the sound of the music as if someone turned it off, and you immediately went to your laptop to check. Shit, you forgot to plug it in. Thank goodness Steve stopped singing before your laptop turned off.

Sighing, you went to the bathroom, opening the tap and splashing some water into your face to wake up. It was barely six, but the sun was shining brightly, giving you no chance to go to sleep - you had always been up with the sun regardless of your circumstances. Now it was one more of your curses, considering you barely slept. 

Watching your reflection in the mirror, you chuckled sarcastically, touching your bottom eyelid - you looked like you just came back from the dead. Would Steve be willing to let you go once he realized you’re no more the sweet beautiful lady he met? What a fucking bastard.

Feeling nauseated, you rubbed your face and went to the kitchen, reheating yesterday’s coffee. You had no strength to make yourself breakfast, even the simplest one. 

Next minute you were wrapping the blanket around yourself and heading out of the house with a mug in your hand, eager to watch the sunrise. You weren’t afraid of Steve since you had never even once spotted him on the beach in the daylight. Besides, you kept a little knife in a pocket of your pants in case you needed to cut yourself and become free from his charms.

You still questioned yourself what were going to do next. Even if your parents and friends would forget you because of the curse affecting them somehow, you still remembered them. You wanted your life back. You wanted to sleep at night, unafraid of being snatched away by someone hiding in the dark. You wanted to wake up, knowing you are safe, and go to work, have one more simple day, then returning back home. You didn’t ask for much.

Well, you would have to figure out how to live in this small town all by yourself, find a new source of income and pretend like no scary mythical creature lingered behind your back. Maybe you would have to ask doctor to make you deaf. It should help with the singing.

Suddenly, you saw a huge figure rising from behind a rock not very far from you. You froze on the spot, looking at Steve walking carefully on the beach. Despite wearing something reminding you of a torn human sweater, he was naked below the waistline, and you blinked, looking at his soft cock dangling in between his legs.

Legs. Steve had a pair of strong, muscled human legs. 

For a second you forgot how to breathe, watching him coming closer to you, his movements a bit unsteady and slow. You became rooted to the ground where you stood, unable to turn away and run from the monster too human to your liking. Was it his magic again? Was it you who couldn’t keep running anymore?

Biting your lips painfully, you felt tears gathering in the corners of your eyes. Steve was wearing your sweater, albeit badly stretched out and torn in a few places - he was so much bigger than you it was a miracle he had somehow managed to put it on. You suddenly remembered how you were searching for this sweater a week or two ago, thinking you had forgot it somewhere in the cottage. How and where did Steve find it? Was he always able to walk? If so, why didn’t he take you away?

Well, maybe that’s what he was going to do now.

Finally finding some strength, you turned back to your cottage, eager to get away as far as possible from him, but then heard Steve’s angry, raspy voice, “Stay where you are!”

And you stood, moving back to face him and unable to do anything at all but watch. 

Steve looked as tired as you are: you saw the bags under his eyes, his full lips cracked, his expression exhausted as if your resistance was straining him. Wasn’t he supposed to be an invincible immortal being wandering the sea? He looked so much more human now you weren’t even sure anymore.

“You want my throat to bleed, don’t you?” He grunted in a hoarse voice, wincing when he spoke, and you realized he lost his voice after signing night after night to you. “I am doing my best for you, and you just turn on that horrible, distasteful music every night!”

You smirked - how dare was he to call Slipknot’s best songs “distasteful music”?

“This shouldn’t happen this way. You’re ruining it.” Steve continued to grumble as he kept coming closer and closer, and, oddly, you found out you weren’t as scared of him anymore as you were in that faithful night. 

“Ruining what?” You asked, sipping your still warm coffee when he approached you, wet and angry.

“The courtship!” The man exclaimed, breathing heavily - it seemed walking on his human legs was talking a toll on him. “You had to come to me, you stubborn woman! And what are you making me do? Come to you instead?”

He coughed, squeezing his eyes shut and touching his neck. It had to be really painful for him to talk.

Despite how wicked he was and how badly you wanted him to have a taste of his own medicine, you almost felt pity for your merman, handing him your mug when he stopped close to you.

“What is this? Coffee?”

“With milk. Good for your throat.” You replied, acknowledging he knew of human drinks.

Gazing at you skeptically, Steve sniffed your mug and then took it in his arms, glancing at the liquid inside. “It’s hot.”

“It’s warm. You won’t burn your tongue.” You said, taking the blanket off your shoulder and wrapping it around his hips - seriously, you felt too awkward to stand near a man dressed in just a little stretched-out sweater.

“You and you fear of nudity, humans.” Steve grunted, but sipped the coffee, nonetheless, quickly getting used to it and finishing your mug. “Oh, this one isn’t bad. I tried espresso, but it was so bitter I couldn’t have the whole cup.”

You chuckled, wrapping your arms around your own body and looking at the merman. What was he going to do now? He didn’t look vile, probably not as angry and upset as before, but who knew what he had in mind.

“So what? Are we going to stay here in the cold or you will bring me to your house?” Steve asked snappish while you snorted at him. 

“Really? I thought your plan was to drown me in the sea, not bask in the warmth of my bed.”

He grinned, pressing your mug to his impressive chest.

“Why would I drown you, silly woman? Come on, it’s cold out here in the morning. I want to stay at your place.”

He took your hand in his, and you finally moved from your spot as if Steve allowed you. Making sure the blanket was wrapped tightly around him, you went to your house, thinking of the knife in a pocket of your pants. If he was planning to attack you, you could definitely stab him through your thin sweater or cut his throat. It would require some skill, though.

Entering the little hallway, Steve looked at the ceiling and winced from the mirror hanging on the wall, looking at his reflection. Shaking his head disapprovingly, he reached out to touch his swollen bottom eyelid. 

“I thought merfolk aren’t afraid of cold.” You said, entering the kitchen and emptying the coffee pot.

“Not in this pathetic human body.” Steve entered after you, rubbing his arm in your completely wet sweater.

“Then you have to take this off and-”

“What? NO!”

He jumped away from you and stayed in the corner like a kid hiding something from his mother. You rolled your eyes.

“Although this is MY sweater, I’m not going to take it from you. I just want to dry it, alright?” You ensured, coming closer. “You’re not going to get warm if you keep it on.”

“This is my sweater.” Steve grumbled, but took it off, regardless, and handed a miserable, partly discolored piece of fabric to you to let you hang it close to the heater, watching you intently - did he really think you’d ran away with your sweater?

When you turned to face him, your blanket wasn’t secured on his hips anymore, and you stared at his naked member again, your face growing terribly hot from the sight. What was that merman thinking? Was he flaunting his.. physique in front of you? You knew of some animals doing that to attract their mates.

“For goodness sake, cover yourself.” You huffed, taking a pack of milk from the fridge. “You don’t want this thing to freeze in the open, do you?”

“Wait, it can freeze if I don’t cover it?” His eyes shot open. “You mean I won’t be able to have children anymore?”

“Yes, this is exactly what I mean.” Oh damn, it was terribly hard not to laugh as you watched Steve looking at you in horror and hurriedly wrapping the blanket around himself as much as he could. It was hilarious. 

Putting two cups of milk into the microwave, you hit the button and pulled out some butter from the fridge to put into the cup once milk would be ready. You certainly didn’t need this hissing little mermaid who lost his voice because he sang too many serenades to you.

“So, what about the courtship?” You asked, stirring melted butter in Steve’s cup as he waited for you, sitting on a chair near the table. “How do you even imagine making babies with me?”

“You don’t know?” He looked at you innocently. “Oh, don’t worry, I’m a pro at that. I’m sure you will enjoy the process.”

“For God’s sake, Steve.” You groaned, placing a cup in front of him and taking yours. “Don’t play stupid here. I can’t live underwater. I can’t even fucking swim!”

“I’m not asking you to.” He shrugged and took his milk, ensuring it wasn’t burning hot before making a sip. “Though you won’t die underwater now. Believe it or not, you can actually breathe there because of my mark.”

You touched the scar, rubbing it with your fingers furiously and narrowing your eyes at the merman who, apparently, seemed very happy to see his mark on your skin. Once he reminded you of this thing, you were ready to snap at him.

“Do you even know how much this thing hurt?” You asked, furrowing your brows.

“This is because you refused to come to me,” he cocked his head to the side, watching you growing angry. “I only need to kiss it to make you feel better. Don’t look at me like that! It’s true, let me show you.”

You stepped backwards immediately as he advanced upon you, caging you with his large body, pressing you to the kitchen counter, his skin cold. Pushing your hands against Steve, you tried to keep him away, but he was so much stronger than you that you almost ended up with your face buried in his chest.

“What the-”

He quickly lowered his head down and sniffed you, bringing his face to your neck. The next moment Steve was touching your scar with his lips, and you whimpered involuntarily, expecting it to hurt like hell. But it didn’t. He simply brushed his dry, chapped lips against your mark, and you felt nothing especially painful. 

You were growing tired of all this magical things you didn’t understand.

“See? There’s nothing scary.” He smiled brightly, and you saw he had human teeth now, too. 

“Yeah, yeah, now please go sit over there,” you grunted, but he didn’t move, laughing at you and ruffling your hair with his large hand. “What are you doing? Go away!”

“Don’t be so cold. You are going to share your life with me, silly woman, so don’t fuss over such little thing.”

You decided it was time for more effective measures and reached out to your pocket to grab the knife, but Steve grabbed your arm before you could do it, sending you a serious look.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you. I’m not here to hurt you, I promise.”

“Really? I have some doubts.” You slapped his hand away, but didn’t try to take the knife again. “Because you have just ruined my life with that bite. How the hell this is going to work, anyway? How do you expect me to live with you? You’re a damn mermaid!”

“I’m a merman,” he said, looking resentful, and returned to his seat, sipping his hot milk with butter - apparently, it was working, and his voice sounded less raspy now. 

You exhaled loudly, enjoying the distance and rubbing your mark that wasn’t as itchy as before, but you scratched it, anyway.

“Listen, I’m not saying I’m totally harmless, but I’m not dangerous for you.” He said as he finished his cup. “You can remain living here, on the ground, I won’t pull you into the water... often.”

“Do you understand I can’t just go and be intimate with you, someone I see for the second time in my life?”

“I’d be surprised if you did. Look, I’m not asking for it either. The courtship doesn’t last for a month. You’ll get used to me, I know.”

His dazzling smile was making you feel nauseated, and you grabbed you cup, having a bit of warm milk, too. Steve was being impossible, but you were thankful he wasn’t forcing himself on you now. Maybe there was a chance to trick him into removing this hex, and you would have to figure it out.

“If you want to know whether we can have children together, I can tell you we definitely can. It doesn’t really matter whether I take my true or human form while making love to you, so it’s up to you how you wanna do it.” Steve grinned, and you clenched your teeth, unable to believe he was talking about it so openly, caring little for your consent. There was something barbaric in this charmingly handsome half-naked man sitting in your kitchen.

Suddenly, you felt like the nausea got much stronger, and merman’s smile wasn’t at fault. What was happening? The world was spinning, and you let go of your almost emptied cup, slipping to the floor. Shit, shit, shit. It wasn’t good.

Oh God. It was him, wasn't it? He had done something to you. He smiled and talked and laughed to make you relax, think of your situation like a simple comedy when, in fact, you were still in grave danger. Were you so stupid to believe him or was it his charms again? You hoped for the latter, curshing yourself for being too carefree and letting him into your house.

“Sorry, sweetheart, it seems I put too much medicine in your milk.” He clicked his tongue as you looked at him in horror, barely able to move now. “I thought we had more time to talk. But, well, we can always do it later.”

Steve was near you the next second, carefully lifting you up in the air in his hands, watching you with a bit of concern on his face.

He proceeded to walk in the direction of the door, but before he snatched your torn sweater and put it on his shoulder, carrying you outside of the cottage that had become your little fortress over these few weeks. However, it could keep the monster off your back, and now all you could do was watching the green door becoming further and further from you with each Steve’s step to the shore.

Your body was completely frozen when his feet reached the water, and the merman left a kiss on your cheek, stroking it tenderly despite that wicked smile on his face.

“I told you, you can’t break the tradition. It is time for you to come to me now."

THE END

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Tags: @finleyjayne​ @alexakeyloveloki​   @helenaeisenhower​ @villanellevi​ @hurricanerin​ @void-hoechlin​ @abyssaint​ @heeeyitskay​ @chris-evans-indian-fanfic​ @navegandoaciegas​ @rosalynshields​ @brattycherubwrites​ @sllooney​ @angrythingstarlight​ @lovelydarkdaydream​ @soleil-dor​ @lookiamtrying @buckysbunny @sourpatchspinster​

#steve rogers x reader #dark steve rogers x reader #steve rogers #dark steve rogers #captain america #yandere #requests #mcu #mcu fanfiction

[dreadpoetssociety]

Fevers Don’t Exist

TW: Fever ? (I’m not sure what counts for triggers so pls lmk if I miss anything)

Prompt: hi!! could u do one maybe where like, the reader is an actress on supernatural and she plays like their younger sister on the show or something and she gets sick at a con or something? Thanks !!

NOTE: Hey guys, I’m alive!!!! I know I have a lot of Spencer prompts atm, but it’s really hard to write them when I’m not like, hyper focused on Criminal Minds. I am going to try though! So sorry I’ve left so many of you in the wind, I am a very inconsistent person, my bad. But here’s this! It’s REALLY bad because I’m terrible at being realistic but like idk it’s something.

I really don’t even know what to put for tags on this. 

()()()()()() 

Ah, September. You knew what came along every September, and looked forward to it for the first eight months of every year. Secaucus, New Jersey. You loved every con you went to, truly. Everyone was so nice, you love staying in hotels, panels are such a great time, the whole thing. It's a great experience outside of the set to get connected with fans. And, they loved you almost as much as you loved them. You were typically closer in age, since you were still just a teenager. You also started out as a fan of the show before somehow snatching a role, so you really were with them at one point. Everything that excites them excited you just as much. And, you loved making friends with them. You weren't allowed to be reckless with your phone number, so you made a snapchat that you shared exclusively with con goers, whom you made swear to secrecy. It was like a club, and you just enjoyed genuinely talking to everyone. But, when you woke up that first morning, you knew it was going to be a long day. Your body ached, and you were still pretty exhausted. You had a fever, but didn't really know if it was a fever because you were still young, and God forbid you ever decided to recognize the signs of you being sick. It was almost like a form of denial, not knowing. You were sweating, but freezing, and your throat felt particularly dry. Your headache rested underneath your eyes for the most part, to which you just blamed on being tired. Your stomach didn't hurt, but you definitely weren't hungry. Even though you hadn't felt exactly 100% the past days before, and you obviously weren't feeling right now, you just deduced that it was all because you were tired, and had a late flight in. As a responsible person does, of course. You didn't even bother taking any medicine for it, because hey, you obviously weren't sick, you'd feel better in a bit, and you didn't have any, so why waste the time, right? 

You groggily got dressed and met up with "the boys" (even though they were all older than you) for the free breakfast downstairs, in a separate room, since fans did happen to stay in the same hotel. You grabbed some Cheerios, only to conspicuously throw them away after. 

"You good, Y/N?" Jared asked out loud, gaining the attention of Jensen, Misha, and Alex. You could feel their eyes burning through your skin. Or, maybe that was the fever. It had to be their eyes, you convinced yourself, you didn't have a fever. You were fine. 

"Yeah, why?" you asked, faking the perk in your voice and confused eyes. Your eyes felt really heavy, you noticed. 

"You just... You look exhausted. And pale." he said, "And you threw away that cereal without eating any of it." 

You looked down at yourself as an effect for what you were about to say, "Wow, well that's one way to make me self-conscious. I thought I looked kind of poppin'." you laughed slightly, trying to play it off. 

"W-wait, no that's- that's not what I meant! You look fine, I just-" he was embarrassed. You and the others chuckled.

"I'm kidding. I'm all good, just went to bed late, y'know?" you smiled. It was hard to try and mask the rasp in your voice, and doing so made you feel the need to cough, so you downed some water until it dialed down a bit. He nodded. In your mind, you blessed your acting skills, thinking you got away with it. What you didn't know was that Misha, Jensen, and Jared, as fathers do, knew every trick in the book, and each noted to keep an eye on you. Not to mention, they'd been acting far longer than you had, and could just tell when one switches into a character. They all figured that if you weren't sick now, you would be in days to come, and exchanged glances with each other, while Alex innocently continued to chew on his toast. 

"Well, if you're tired, I don't think you have a panel or anything for another hour or something, maybe you could catch up on some sleep then." Jared suggested. You shrugged.

"Nah," you said, "I've got photo-ops in like, twenty minutes. I should actually probably get going. I'll catch up later!" 

You left with a wave, and disappeared into the hotel somewhere. You stopped in your room, allowing yourself finally to set free the coughs living in the back of your throat. You blamed it on your throat being dry since you didn't drink enough water. Not on germs. So, you grabbed two water bottles from the small fridge in your room, and left, making your way towards the convention center.

  You felt slightly better during photo-ops, which just confirmed in your mind that it was impossible that you were sick right now. You smiled and talked to everyone. There was one girl, who introduced herself as Meredith, who stuck out in your mind. She gave you this super cool hand painted keychain, which you very excitedly put on your keys instantly.

"Dude, I've been looking for a cool keychain. Not just one of those janky ones you find at like 7-11, like a cool one. This is so exciting." you smiled genuinely. You had just recently bought yourself a car, and thought that your keys looked a little lonely, and searched for hours on Etsy for something to spice it up a bit. A weird obsession, thinking about it now.

She laughed, "I'm glad you like it!"

"Hell, yeah! Now, are there any poses you wanna do? Or do you just want to hit that casual look? I could make it look like I'm meeting you." you stupidly rambled. One of your traits that was so widely known was how funny and awkward (in a good way) that you were. It took you a long time to get to that point, though, because you were always anxious about meeting others. You still are every now and then, but it's different here. 

"I was just hoping to get a hug." she said, "If that's okay with you." 

"Yeah, that's cool!" you wrapped your arms around each other and shot the camera a grin. The girl looked a bit confused. 

"Hey," she said, quietly, "are you like, okay? You feel really hot."

Nervously, you replied, "Oh, no, yeah totally fine. I'm just wearing two layers, and it's getting spicy in here."

"Yeah," she answered, "don't push yourself, okay?"

"I won't, thank you. It was really nice meeting you!" 

"You, too! Thanks!" she waved goodbye and you moved on to the last few people in line. She was right, though. You realized that you felt worse than you did when you walked in. You thought it had gone away for a while, but now it was just amplified. You noticed you were cold again, but that you were sweating as well. It must've just been the temperature in the room. These conventions aren't always able to keep a steady temp in the entire building, right?

This day, you didn't have much to do. Most of your events were on the other days to come. You had one panel in a few hours, and then a panel with Jared, Jensen, and Misha a few hours after that, and then bam, the day was over. You just had to get through those two events. Just two. 

Two, events. And both were an hour. So, two hours out of the day. Rookie work. Yet, as your panel approached, the headache had expanded from under your eyes to anywhere that there was space to hurt, your throat ached and so did your lungs from how much you were going off somewhere to cough in privacy, your body felt heavy, you couldn't tell if you were hot or cold at this point it was some weird combination of both, your stomach hurt just slightly, the world was moving around you a bit more than it usually would, and the fever you "didn't" have had climbed a degree, probably two. And, at some point during the day, you got pretty congested. You felt like you could just fall asleep at any moment. Jared and Jensen happened to be walking by where you had been waiting by yourself, away from any congoers or employees, and noticed that even though you were leaning against a wall, you somehow were still swaying.

"Y/N?" Jensen called out, worried. You heard him, you knew you were supposed to respond, but didn't know how. Maybe you did have a fever, and maybe you sort of let it out of control. It was like you were comprehending them, but not at the same time. You heard everything, but it just swept right through your feverish mind. The walked in front of you and examined you within seconds. You felt Jared's cold, really abnormally large man hand sweep your hair back and land on your forehead. 

"J, she's burning up." you felt another hand on your face. You, quite exhaustedly, swatted it away. They couldn't figure out how it'd gotten so bad so quickly. You were sick this morning, but not to this degree. They knew then that you had just shrugged it off all day, and your teenage fever brain probably didn't even think to take any kind of medicine or anything for it, even if you were trying to hide it.

"I'm good. Just tired. Fevers don’t exist." you finally mumbled, taking a few deep breathes, which you hadn't really been able to do in a bit without being rudely interrupted by a bone-shaking cough. It felt nice, almost. The boys sighed at you and shook their heads. 

"Y/N, you should go back to your room and get some rest. We can bring you some stuff that'll help." Jared suggested. You shook your head and opened your eyes, which somehow felt even heavier.

"Nah," you said to them, "I've got a panel, I think, in like, I ‘dunno, some minutes or something. Something I-" you pushed yourself off the wall to try and make your way somewhere, but stumbled a step or two, which result in Jensen and Jared instinctively to grab you in order to keep you steady.

"Like hell we're letting you go to that, Y/N, you can't even form a sentence, or stand for that matter. You're out of your mind. We're going to bring you back now, we'll take care of your panel thing." Jensen stated pretty sternly. You were about to fight back, and they could see it, but you coughed a few times, and they could almost feel it in their own chests. You just nodded in defeat.

"Yeah, maybe I could just like, sleep, for an hour or two." you whispered, tiredly. The two were still holding you steady, and could see you already falling asleep before even going anywhere. 

"Or six, by the looks of it." Jared joked lightly.

"Poor kid." Jensen said to Jared as the were walking out of your room. They helped you get there, and you were gone before you even saw the bed, "Why do they always have to pretend like they aren't sick? Look where it gets them."

"Don't know, man. You can't talk, though. You literally tell people you are immune to illness." Jared laughed quietly, shutting you door.

"Well I am. I am the perfect example of health. I don't get sick." 

"Yeah," Jared rolled his eyes, "Right. Watch you catch what Y/N has. You practically carried her all the way here. There's no way you're escaping it." Walking towards the center, the back way of course, Jensen scoffed, "Please, germs take one look at me and know not to mess this up. And, by the logic, that means you're already infected, too. So, tell me, princess, what sort of soup do you want spoon-fed?" 

Again, Jared rolled his eyes, and the two laughed. They weren't making fun of you, they were making fun of each other, and knew that you would've wanted in on that action.

"Y/N probably would've destroyed us if she heard that. Something along the longs of 'You want me to tuck you in? Carry you bridal style?'" Jared pitched his voice a tone higher for it. Again, the two men laughed.

They made their way backstage of what's supposed yo be your panel, and informed the crew about what was going on. They were just going to fill in for you, probably tell a few embarrassing stories.

When they made their way through the curtain, the crowd shouted. They were obviously excited to see the two leads, but also were obviously confused. "Alright, you're probably confused." Jensen stated the obvious, "Because obviously, we look nothing like Y/N, and thank God she does not look like us." The crowd laughed.

"Anyway, Y/N can't make it today. She's really sick-" the crowd cut Jared off with a unison "awe." People yelled out that they hoped she felt better, tell her to take care of herself, and so on.

"Yeah, poor kid looked like she was just going to fall asleep right where she was standing. She literally tried to come anyway, like, kid, you're making no sense. Y/N couldn't really fight against us, though, so she's sleeping now." Jensen explained, "So we came here to chat in her stead, but just know she really was planning on coming. That kid loves you guys." and again, the "awe" rolled through the crowd. 

"If she wasn't sick, she could totally kick both your-" the last word was cut off, but was implied anyway, someone screamed from the crowd, which resulted in laughter.

"Yeah, probably. Even if we were stronger than her," sarcastically, of course, "she'd still beat us. Kid's too fast, and I'm too old." Jared laughed.

In the last ten minutes of the panel, Jared decided to give you call. Not only to check in on you, but so you could at least say hi to your crowd. When you heard the phone ring, you groggily opened your eyes and aimlessly reached for it.

"Hello?" you answered. Jared almost frowned at how sick you sounded, even with just one word.

"Y/N?" Jensen stepped in, "It's Jensen."

"Unfortunate." you sighed exhaustedly. It was joke, a really tired one, but still enough to make the crowd laugh.

"We're here at your panel, we thought you might want to say hi." Jared said loudly, holding the speaker of his phone to the microphone. 

"Panel?" you asked. Panel? What panel? Your delirious mind was clearly confused, "Who's that?" 

"Y/N, the con. The convention panel?" Jensen actually sounded worried. They probably should've thought to give you some sort of medicine to do something about the fever you had before they'd left.

"Oh," you closed your eyes again, almost falling asleep, before remembering finally what it was they meant, and after a moment, "Oh! Crap, the panel thing, I'm late."

"No, Y/N, stay there, we've got it covered remember? You can't come. You can say hi to them, though." Jensen interjected quickly.

"Okay, hi guys." you just followed as told.

The crowd responded with a series of hello's. 

"'M really sorry. I hope they aren't boring you." the two men could practically hear you closing your eyes. The crowd responded in inaudible chatter. Jensen and Jared walked from the mic for a second.

"Sorry if we woke you, kid." Jared apologized, having just realized they probably could've left you alone, "W also just wanted to check in. See how you're doing."

"How are you feeling?" Jensen asked, but got a mumbled word in response, "Alright, well, just go back to sleep, we'll be up there soon." 

Jared hung up the phone, and the two began to answer the last few questions and close up. They waved their goodbyes to the crowd, and started heading back your way.

"Jensen, you got any over the counters with you? Thermometers or anything? All I've got is Advil, and I don't even know what's really bothering her yet other than that cough and being tired."

"Yup. Danneel always makes me carry literally an entire medicine cabinet, just for these moments. I'll go get 'em and meet you there. It'd probably do her some good to eat something, too. I don't know if she's got like, a stomach virus thing going on, though." Jensen answered.

"I'll see what she'll say and let you know." 

The two parted ways, and Jared made his way to you. Even though he'd only talked to you just a few minutes before, you were dead to the world by the time he opened the door. The room was boiling, and Jared looked over to the thermostat to see that you'd at some point put it on to 90 degrees. 

"Jesus, Y/N, I know you've got a fever, but damn." he said, more so to himself than to you. He looked over at you after turning it down to see you curled beneath what looked like any blanket you could find. He came over and started removing the blankets slowly, and shook you gently to wake you up.

"Y/N, wake up for a minute, it's Jared."

"'Mm." was all you said, until you realized your layers of warmth had been moved, "What're doing? It's cold."

"Y/N, you're dripping in sweat. It's the fever making you cold."

"I don't have a fever." you retorted, "I'm good. Just tired."

"Kid, you've been tired the whole day. You've been sleeping this whole time." he tried rationalizing.

"I have?" you questioned, closing you eyes again. Jared put his hand to your forehead again. Somehow, it was warmer than the first time he'd done it before the panel. It was then that Jensen finally appeared, a whole bag of things in hand, "Could you bring the thermometer over?"

"Yeah, gotcha." He walked over and rummaged through the bag at the same time, pulling out a thermometer.

"Y/N, we need to take your temperature." Jensen said.

"No need." you said, "'M not sick."

"You are so obviously sick, I'm not asking." again with that stern voice. Jared gave him a "Hey, she's sick, back off a little" sort of look, but it had worked, and you let them take your temp. They were almost shocked when the thing beeped at 103.

"Should we take her to a hospital? That's way too high." Jared asked. 

"If it gets any higher, yes, but let's see if we can bring it down first." Jensen replied.

"No hospitals." you demanded, opening your eyes and glaring at them. 

"We aren't bringing you yet, Y/N, but I need you to eat this so you can take some meds." he held out two pieces of toast that he must've brought from his room. You hated toast even when you weren't sick.

"I'm not really hungry." 

"I know, but it'll help. You haven't told us what's bothering you yet, either." Jared responded.

"Nothing's-" you coughed a few times, a bit violently, "bothering me." "We can see that." Jensen said sarcastically.

"Everything's bothering me." you whispered, giving up.

"Your stomach hurt?" Jensen asked. You waved your hand from side to side to signal a so-so, "Think you'll get sick at all?"

"No, it's not like that, I don't think." you breathed out, another cough escaping you. You took a few bites out of the toast. It made you uncomfortable, but it was then that you realized you probably felt that way since you really hadn't eaten much that day or the one before, which probably contributed to the splitting headache. It didn't go away after, either though. You pushed yourself up. You almost fell over, but Jared put a hand out for you.

"Alright, good. Take this. I'm going to be frank, it tastes disgusting." Jensen handed over a small cup of liquid, "Sometimes, if you take it like a shot, it helps. But you shouldn't know how to take shots, but if you do it, I won't judge." And so you did, causing the two to chuckle slightly at you. 

"You were right, about the sleep thing." you slumped back onto the bed heavily, like a brick.

"When am I ever wrong?" Jensen asked, "Don't answer that, actually."

But you were already sleeping again, and the boys decided to stay nearby for now. The next panel wasn't for another few hours anyway, and they just didn't want you to be alone. Also, incase you were wrong about the toast, and it decided to make its return. Jared's phone began to ring loudly, to which he very quickly tried to answer so his obnoxious ringtone wouldn't wake you up again, not that you wouldn't have just fallen back asleep anyway.

"Misha? Hey, what's up?" Jared answered. Jensen walked over to hear what was going on on the other side of the line, but Jared just decided to put it on speaker.

"Where are you guys? I haven't seen you all day. Felicia, Alex, and I are going out for lunch, we were wondering if you guys want to come. I tried calling Y/N, but she didn't answer, so." he rambled.

"That's because Y/N's not feeling well." Jensen said, giving him a solution to his predicament of not being answered, "We're with her right now, so we'll have to pass."

"She's sick? Is she okay?" 

"Yeah, I think so. She's just got this crazy fever we've been trying to bring down. Thinking about it now, Jensen, we should probably check it again." 

"A fever?"

"It's been at 103 degrees for like, two hours. At least for what we know of. She's probably had one all day, but as a dumb teenager does, she just tried to ignore it." 

"If it goes up you should-"

"Yeah, we know," Jared said, "we're trying really hard to avoid that, though. Also, she'll definitely fight against it, I don't know." 

Jensen, from the other side of the room at the sound of a beeping thermometer, could be heard on Misha's end, "It went down, finally. 102.2."

"Thank God, I was getting worried."

"Should I come there? Do you guys need any help?" Misha asked.

"I mean you can, but I think we're good. She's just been trying to sleep it off the whole time, so not much is really going on." Jensen was closer to the phone now, "Like, she's got this cough, a headache, and you can hear how congested she sounds, but mostly I think she's just exhausted. I honestly don't know how because she's just been sleeping for hours."

"Fatigue."

"Yeah, poor kid. I don't think I've ever seen her so tired, it almost makes me tired to be honest." Jensen joked.

"Maybe you're just getting sick." Jared slipped in.

"Not possible. I am immune."

"Nobody is immune, Jensen." Misha sighed.

"I'm not nobody." he shrugged. 

"Alright, well, we're going to get lunch then. If you need anything let me know, and tell her I hope she feels better." Misha concludes.

"We will, thanks Misha." and with that, Jared hung up. For a few more hours, the two hung around. They were there when you woke from some fever dreams, and when you needed a cough drop, or twelve, and wake you up every now and then to check your temperature, which raised and dropped and raised and dropped, but currently was at a very steady 102.4. But, soon enough, it was time for them to leave for the last panel of the day, and unsurprisingly, you tried to follow suit.

"Y/N, we gotta go, but we'll be back in about an hour from the panel." Jared said. You took a deep breath and sluggishly pushed yourself to the side of the bed. Having been sick, and not having sat up in a few hours, the blood rushed from your head, leaving you dizzy.

"What're you doing?" Jensen asked.

"The panel. I missed the last one I should go to this one. I feel okay." you yawned, then coughed slightly.

"Y/N, really, you shouldn't even think about pushing it like that." Jared said. Jensen walked over to you, half on the bed, clearly trying to steady yourself just from the movement of sitting up. The spinning room honestly almost made the toast make a reprise, and you hiccupped, and held your breath.

"Hey," Jensen grabbed a can quickly, noticing, "are you going to be sick?"

Giving it a minute, it went away, and you shook you head no, causing a huge tension to leave the room.

"Alright, well, remember how you said I was right all the time earlier?" Jensen pun the can down.

"No, must've been the fever." you half joked, causing Jared to laugh. 

"Alright- well- okay, shut up. We agreed I'm always right, and that I was right about needing sleep, so I say you need some more." Jensen demanded rather than suggested. 

"Yeah, or at least lay around and do nothing. I can't imagine ever sleeping as much as you just did." Jared joked, pushing you very gently back down, with his hand on your back, knowing you would just hit the bed without it. Your eyes were heavy again, and your throat was painfully dry, and you coughed. Your aching head also agreed with the two of them to your dismay.

"Maybe just a bit more." you mumbled, "A few minutes."

"Yeah a few minutes, sure." Jared smiled, knowing you were probably going to knock out for a few hours once again. You opened your eyes again.

"You think," you coughed, "that they'll be mad?

"Who?" Jensen asked.

Feeling pretty sick, you said, "That I don't go? I don’t feel really good."

Ah, the fever comes to play once again, it seems, but the two felt some sort of triumph now that you've at least admitted to being sick, even if it's been hours. It concerned them, though, if you felt bad enough to admit it.

"No, they'll be fine about it. We'll be back soon. Misha or Alex might come in to check on you, alright?" Jared answered, to which you nodded.

They weren't gone long. You spent half the next day sleeping, too, until you could stand without swaying. You did sneak back to the con, against Jensen and Jared's orders, since you really didn't break that fever and cough for a few more days, only to be caught after a tweet of you at the con was trending and the cast caught wind of it. But, eventually, you were better, and got the chance to help Jared take care of an "always immune" Jensen. And he was more stubborn than you were.

#jensen ackles x you #jensen ackles x reader #jensen ackles x y/n #jared padalecki #jensen ackles #jared padalecki x you #jared padalecki x reader #y/n #supernatural #supernatural x you #supernatural x reader #sickfic #spn #spn cast

[rkived]

━ CHASING PAVEMENTS 03 | JJK

↳ PAIRING: dad!jk/married!jk/bff!jk x reader 

↳ GENRE/TAGS: f2l, angst, unrequited feelings, cheating, future smut

↳ WARNINGS: (for this chapter) time jumps, mention of divorce, blood mention ((but like nothing serious)), forced kisses, just sad stuff like this is sad guys lol

↳ WORD COUNT: 8.6k

↳ EXCERPT: ‘‘Jungkook doesn’t want to think this is the end, maybe it’s that stupid voice inside his head that always holds on to things that he knows he should let go of. But he can’t just let go of this and move on. He doesn’t remember what life was like before you and he sure as hell does not want to know what it’ll be like without you.’’

↳ A/N: getting this chapter out has been ((a pain in the ass)) tough !! & cp was supposed to end with this chapter but that was not realistic at all lmao but i do hope u like this n i’ll try to get pt4 quickly as possible <3 thx

01 | 02 | 03 | 04 

‘‘Okay everyone, let’s switch to the upward facing dog!’’

You really don’t want to be here. There’s a lot of stuff running through your head right now that are more important than focusing on yoga positions. You wish you were thinking about grocery shopping or paying that month’s bills. 

Instead, you’re still stuck on the downward facing dog as your mind tells you you’re an idiot, a homewrecker and most importantly, a terrible friend. 

‘‘Y/N, upward facing dog!’’ The instructor, Namjoon, reminds you with a gentle smile as he notices you haven’t switched positions like the rest of the class. You nod and smoothly place your body as he had taught in the classes before.

The only reason why you came to your Saturday morning yoga class was because even with all that happened last night, you wanted to feel a sense of normality. Like you’re capable of going on about your life like nothing had happened.

That’s selfish and stupid because as much as you tried, every single moment since you woke up revolved around last night.

From the moment you opened your eyes, noticing Sunhi wasn’t sleeping next to you, snuggled into your chest like you had last remembered her to be before she fell asleep and you following soon after. 

And as your heart beat faster at the thought of finding her in her dad’s arms instead, watching Saturday morning cartoons on the T.V in your living room; you instead found the place neat and tidy. The messy pillows on your couch where placed like they hadn’t even been moved to begin with, like no one besides you had been in the apartment the night before. 

Somehow he managed to do all of this without you even noticing. You wondered at what time he woke up, cleaned up, took Sunhi without making any fuss and left, all before your 7 AM alarm could wake you up.

He even made you breakfast too. Some eggs, bacon and toast. 

‘‘Y/N, your legs are touching the mat.’’ Namjoon notes as he stands in front of you, ‘‘Let’s focus, okay?’’

You nod once again, though this time a little more embarrassed. If only you could explain to your instructor why you’re so distracted. 

No messages either. No text explaining why he had to leave so early. No sticky note placed on your fridge door about how he made you breakfast. No slight shake to your sleeping body to let you know that he’d be taking Sunhi. Nothing. 

Would’ve you liked that, though? 

You could say yes because he’s your friend and it’s only fair since you took care of his daughter the night before. 

But it’s not right, because friends don’t kiss each other, let alone the way you had let him kiss you and touch you while his daughter slept in your room and his wife waited for both of them at home.

There was a war going on inside you between your brain and your heart. 

Your heart, being a weak ass bitch, was telling you about how exciting everything was. How nice it felt to have Jungkook tell you that he wanted to be with you, that he no longer felt happy with his wife, how perfectly his lips encaptured your own and how you could still feel them on you. 

But your brain, obviously being the logical one between the two, reminded you about how wrong it was. You had never wanted to be placed in a position of being ‘‘the other woman’’. That even though you might not like Jiwoo and had spent years hoping your friend would someday wake up and realize this too, this didn’t feel right. 

‘‘Alright, let’s drink some water now.’’ Namjoon announces, clasping his hands together and showing off that dimple that most ─if not all─ of the students went heart eyes over. 

You take the time to check your phone instead, you don’t need the water because you didn’t do shit anyway. There’s no text from Minji, who you’re scared will somehow, by the grace of everything that’s holy, find out about what you did. No text from Jungkook either and you’re wondering why he hasn’t bothered to send one. 

Instead, there’s a text from Taehyung and you mutter a curse. 

[8:34 AM] Taehyung: hey y/n! i’m sure you’re in your yoga class rn but i wanted to see if maybe you���d be up for lunch at my place? i’ll try and cook something nice :) 

Ah, of course that throughout all of this you forgot about Taehyung. 

The sweet guy who had stuck around only for you to pay him back by kissing your best friend, the one Taehyung had to pretend wasn’t bothered by his interruption that night a few weeks ago. 

God, you do have a way to fuck things up for yourself. 

You don’t know how long you stood there thinking what to reply to him, but it definitely was for a few minutes because you only came back to reality once you heard your name being called once by the instructor.

‘‘Y/N,’’ Namjoon repeats and you look over at him with a puzzled look, ‘‘we’re starting again, if you’d like to join us.’’ There’s that smile again. Bless his patience, you wonder if he’s actually this calm because of yoga or he’s just really good at pretending. 

You look back down at your phone, the screen displaying a text that’s still waiting to be replied to. 

‘‘I uhm─I gotta go, sorry.’’ You quickly reply, making Namjoon look at you with wide eyes, but he makes no effort to stop you either. 

And as quickly as you can, you collect your belongings before you’re heading out the door without saying goodbye. 

Either you quit yoga altogether or just apologize to Namjoon like a grownup next Saturday. Whatever it is, you’re not thinking about what decision to make about your little extracurricular right now. 

There’s only so much you can handle at a time.

Jungkook is lucky that Jiwoo works Saturday mornings because with her away, he’s able to enter his house without having to sneak in. 

He opens the door wide, making way for him and a slightly awake Sunhi in his arms. He drops the keys on the counter without caring about the noise it makes. He doesn’t even have to pretend like he’s walking on glass, his boots are allowed to hit the wooden floor without a care in the world. 

The place doesn’t look much different from what he had left it like the day before. There’s only a dirty glass on the sink, a product of Jiwoo’s daily breakfast smoothies and since she’s always in a rush she never has time to clean it up. 

‘‘Are you still sleepy, pumpkin?’’ he quietly asks his daughter and she nods, he doesn’t blame her since he’s the one who woke her up at 6 AM. ‘‘Alright, I’ll take you to your bed,” he says, a kiss on her head following shortly after. 

He wonders if Jiwoo enjoyed herself last night. No daughter and no husband, sounds like an ideal night for her. It’s not like she was worried about their whereabouts either, considering she hadn’t even bothered to text him wondering why they hadn’t come home. 

If Jungkook’s supposed to feel guilty, he isn’t. 

He’s heard stories before about how there’s a voice in your head constantly reminding you about what you did and how wrong it is. That he’ll be unable to sleep knowing he cheated on his wife while she lies next to him. That he won’t be able to look at her again without feeling remorse all over him.

And when Jiwoo returns home at noon, there’s none of that at all. He offers her a nod of acknowledgement once she enters the living room to find him sitting with his laptop, watching through old videos that he took years back. 

She puts her index finger up, telling him to give her a minute. She’s on a phone call with a friend of hers that Jungkook can only conclude is Hyeri, who he probably met at some point but can’t remember what her face looked like. 

‘‘I know! Like, why do you have to be such a bitch about it? We get that you’re sucking the boss’s dick in private, so you might as well─’’

Jiwoo’s voice is too distracting and so, Jungkook places his earphones in to hear what this video’s audio is about. Once he does, he hits play and the audio is loud enough to drown out Jiwoo’s whining. 

‘‘Guess who came to see you, Pumpkin?’’ 

Jungkook gasps as he remembers this was part of a series of videos he was supposed to show Sunhi once she was old enough to understand them. He recorded a few until he was drowning in work to even grab his camera again. It saddens him that he wasn’t able to continue.

He decides he’ll show them to her later because right now Sunhi is too busy playing with her dolls inside her room to even pay attention to him.

‘‘It’s auntie Y/N! And she came bearing gifts,’’ Jungkook smiles, switching the focus on you ‘‘is that a Fisher Price Taco Tuesday toy set that I see?’’ he wonders in a fake curious tone as you look at him with narrowed eyes ‘‘I wonder how she knew you wanted that, Sunhi. It’s not like your dad had it on his Amazon wishlist or anything.’’

‘‘Very funny.’’ You mumble, handing him the toys so you could go ahead and grab a tiny three-month-old Sunhi from the bed ‘‘Aren’t you the cutest little bean in this entire world? Aren’t you?’’ you coo at the little girl, who looks at you with wide eyes and you’re forced to blink a couple of times because she looks just like him. 

‘‘Of course she is, she’s my spitting image!’’ Jungkook confirms your thought as he grabs Sunhi’s cheek gently with his fingers and squeezes, making the baby giggle.

You side-eye him and then focus your attention back on the baby in your hands, ‘‘No, you’re not, Sunhi. Your daddy is not cute at all.’’ 

‘‘You’re gonna make me put this camera down and have a discussion about this.’’ 

Jungkook chuckles at the footage, noticing how he made you smile because of his comment. The video isn’t long, it’s mostly you cooing to a then tiny Sunhi, giggling at the way you would nuzzle your nose into her belly as Jungkook laughed behind the camera. 

‘‘Jungkook, look at her!’’ You practically squeal as Sunhi grabs your thumb with her little hand ‘‘Oh my gosh, I think I’m gonna cry.’’ 

He laughs as he does a close-up of his daughter holding on to your finger, until he hears the little sniffle you let out and the camera is now focused on you silently wiping a tear away. 

‘‘Wait, you’re actually crying?’’ Jungkook asks in disbelief and you turn to look at him to find the lens focused on you ‘‘Sunhi, you’re Auntie Y/N loves you so much that she’s crying! How cute.’’ 

‘‘You’re so dumb, seriously.’’ you mumble with a frown, going back to gawking at the baby still holding on to your thumb. 

Jungkook sighs, ‘‘I’m gonna have to bleep that out, y’know?’’

You laugh and shrug your shoulders, caressing Sunhi’s stomach. Jungkook whispers ‘cute’, so soft that you’re unable to hear it.

Once it ends, Jungkook is able to see his smiling face as it reflects on the black screen and it’s only then he realized he’d been grinning the whole time. Now his ears are filled with Jiwoo talking over the phone and his smile goes back to a straight line. 

Jungkook closes the video and clicks on the next one, hoping that it’s one that involves you as well. He’s unable to press play because Jiwoo is suddenly standing in front of him, arms crossed and she’s no longer talking on her phone. 

‘‘Yes?’’ He asks, removing an earbud to show her she has his full attention.

‘‘So, where were you last night?’’ 

Jungkook’s slightly surprised that she cares. He tends to forget there’s still some humanity left in her after all, ‘‘At Y/N’s.’’ he answers with a shrug, eyes going back to stare at the screen of his laptop. 

Jiwoo scoffs and he’s forced to look at her again, eyebrow slightly raised. He hopes she doesn’t start because it’s too early and it’s a Saturday. But Jiwoo doesn’t like taking breaks like he does.

‘‘I thought you said that she wasn’t going to be able to take care of Sunhi on Fridays.’’ There’s bitterness in her tone, ‘‘so, what were you doing there?’’ 

Jungkook understands where Jiwoo’s curiosity comes from, but it’s strange. She’s never been the type to ask where he’s been, what he’s doing with Sunhi while she’s not around ─which is practically all the time─ and doesn’t care for your business either. 

‘‘I just stopped by.’’ Jungkook mutters, stroking the nape of his neck in an attempt to not seem suspicious, ‘‘We hung out and Sunhi fell asleep, she didn’t wanna come back home.’’ 

And that’s true, Jiwoo narrows her eyes at him as if she’s debating whether or not to believe him and the excuse of their sleeping daughter. She doesn’t know Sunhi that well to conclude if it’s possible or not. 

‘‘And what, did you all three sleep together in the same bed? Playing family, maybe?’’ 

Jungkook looks at her in disbelief. This is a first. 

‘‘What?’’ Is all he’s able to muster because he’s genuinely shocked at her accusation. 

Jiwoo rolls her eyes, ‘‘Oh, please. Like I’m going to buy that hanging out bullshit.’’ Jungkook looks like a deer stuck in headlights and she chuckles, ‘‘Is what I give to you not enough?’’ 

‘‘I─what are you on about?’’ 

He figures this is her picking a fight because he wasn’t around yesterday to attend her needs like he usually does every Friday night. But Jungkook’s mind is quick to remind him of what he did and it’d be really ironic if he denies Jiwoo’s accusations, that for the first time are actually true. 

‘‘I carried around that girl for nine months, ruined my body because of her, all for you to pick someone else over me?’’ Jiwoo’s voice is raised a little higher and Jungkook can’t help but look over at Sunhi’s bedroom door and hope his daughter is not listening to anything coming from the living room. ‘‘I knew I should’ve never trusted her, I always knew your friendship with her was fucking weird.’’

Jungkook doesn’t want to raise his voice either. It’s not going to get them anywhere. But he can’t stand the way she’s speaking about his daughter and you, she’s never crossed those boundaries before. 

‘‘Are you insane? How can you talk about your daughter like she’s nothing?’’ Jungkook spats out, ‘‘I’ve always been thankful for what you did, I know the shit you went through to bring her into this world.’’ 

But Jiwoo doesn’t care about how loud she’s being, ‘‘You’re so thankful you pay me back by fucking your best friend? While I’m alone over here waiting for you to come back?’’

Jungkook has to take a deep breath and close his eyes for a second, before he loses it. 

He clears his throat, ‘‘Jiwoo, I have always chosen you. Always. I did back when I was a sophomore, I did it when I asked you to marry me, and I did it when I chose you to be the mother of my children. So, I don’t know what─’’

‘‘I don’t give a flying fuck if you chose me! I was supposed to be all of that either way, Jungkook.’’ She interjects.

Was she, though? Of course, she was his girlfriend then. It would make sense that she’d be the one to end up marrying him, having his kids and living the happy life everyone guaranteed he’d live alongside her. 

But he hasn’t been thinking about the choices he ended up taking back then. Instead, he’s been wondering about the ‘what if’s and Jiwoo isn’t in any of them. 

Jungkook’s been daydreaming for months now about how different his life would’ve turned out if he had never asked the pretty girl in his class all those years back and instead had focused his attention somewhere else. Or someone else.. 

‘‘Are you going to answer me?��’ Jiwoo’s stern voice brings him back to the reality he hates, ‘‘Were you going to pick me or was I a second choice?’’ She slowly asks, giving him an opportunity to digest every single word she spoke. 

‘‘You weren’t a second choice,’’ he mumbles and his gaze has faltered and instead focused back on the screen of his laptop. Clicking on a video randomly, trying to distract himself from the situation at hand. Hoping that whatever he says is enough for Jiwoo to leave him alone. 

It doesn’t help that the video automatically plays and it’s you on the first frame, a big smile as you hold Sunhi towards the camera, making her wiggle in your arms. 

What if. 

‘‘Show me that you love me, then.’’

The video still plays as Jungkook looks back at Jiwoo standing right in front of him, her arms are still crossed, but the look on her face is different. Her brows are no longer furrowed and Jungkook might be wrong, but he thinks her eyes look glossy. 

He doesn’t act quickly enough and she takes the laptop from him, closing it before she can even notice what is it that has garnered his attention. Jiwoo straddles his lap and he jumps slightly at the action, placing her arms around his neck as she looks at him with innocent eyes. 

If he didn’t know her, he would’ve believed them. 

‘‘Jiwoo, let’s not─’’ 

‘‘I missed you yesterday,’’ she interjects in a whisper ‘‘show me that you love me right now.’’ 

Her lips latch onto his neck, biting and sucking on the skin as he tries to wriggle himself out of her hold, but her hands push at his chest so he can stay still. 

‘‘C’mon,’’ she mumbles ‘‘show me.’’ She’s pleading by then.

He feels nothing. There’s no electricity in Jiwoo’s kisses. No tingles on his back, no goosebumps on his skin, no fireworks going off. If anything, everytime her lips meet his skin it feels bitter, like they don’t belong there at all. 

‘‘Daddy, come please!’’ The muffled voice of Sunhi inside her room interrupts the one-sided moment and Jungkook is silently thanking her. 

Jiwoo doesn’t make an effort to move as she keeps kissing on all the exposed skin he has to offer. Jungkook sighs in frustration as he forces her off him, making her land beside him with an astonished expression.

Her hands tighten into fists as she looks at him like he’s gone insane, ‘‘What the fuck is wrong with you?’’ She asks in disbelief.

Jungkook blinks, ‘‘Did you─?’’ He gestures with his finger over to his daughter’s room, ‘‘Sunhi is calling me.’’ 

His wife scoffs, crossing her arms over her chest again, ‘‘Of course, you always go running when it comes to her.’’ 

Contrary to his belief, there is no humanity left in Jiwoo at all. She’s just really good at pretending like she cares so she can get her way. This is the last time Jungkook falls for this trick.

Jungkook opens his mouth, but nothing comes out. He repeats this action a few times, to stammer something out. Anything. But there’s nothing besides the expecting silence of his wife as she chuckles incredulously. Jungkook ignores this and turns around, a second away from opening Sunhi’s bedroom door─

‘‘You’re a waste of a husband.’’ Jiwoo sneered. 

His hand drops from the door handle and he sighs, taking a deep breath in and out.

He looks back at her, ‘‘You know what, Jiwoo? I wasn’t lying when I said you weren’t my second choice.’’ he informs and her eyebrow raises up ‘‘But you aren’t my first choice now either.’’

Jiwoo scowls and heaves in anger, ready to let hell loose on him ‘‘I knew that who─’’

‘‘It’s Sunhi,’’ he states and Jiwoo closes her mouth before she can even finish her sentence. ‘‘Ever since I knew you were pregnant with her, she’s been at the top of my list and she’ll always be there. I don’t care what you do or say to me, I really don’t. You don’t love me, Jiwoo.’’

At the accusation, her eyes soften and she’s standing up to argue that it’s not true, but Jungkook raises his hand in a motion to stop her. 

‘‘You don’t love me and I don’t love you.’’ 

Jungkook expected her to start yelling at him like she usually did, but Jiwoo’s rendered speechless on her spot as she stares at him, blinking rapidly. 

‘‘I don’t love you,’’ he repeats ‘‘and I haven’t loved you for a while now. I don’t remember the last time my heart raced up when I saw you or when I stopped enjoying kissing you. And I’m sorry, because I should’ve told you instead of pretending like I did.’’ 

Jiwoo’s motionless as she takes all of his words in. 

‘‘But I did it for her because I didn’t want her to hate me if you ever left. But that was a dumb idea because you don’t care about Sunhi. And frankly, I doubt she cares about you either. She never speaks about you, never asks about you, she’s used to you not being here even if you sort of are.’’ 

Jungkook places his hand over the doorknob once again and Jiwoo grimaces.

‘‘I should’ve never begged you to come back. I should’ve thought about what you wanted and it’s always been clear to me what that is,’’ Jungkook swallows the knot he feels in his throat ‘‘and it’s never been Sunhi or me.’’

‘‘Jungkook.’’

He thinks she’s about to tell him how sorry she is. That she’ll recognize how heartless she’s been and how she not only failed him, but failed their daughter too. Maybe beg for a final try at their relationship as she promises she’ll change this time. 

Jungkook hums and spares her one last glance.

Jiwoo has a stoic expression on her face and she speaks under her breath, but clear enough for him to hear, ‘‘Sign the papers when you get them.’’

You expect Minji to just jump at you any minute now because if looks could kill, you’d be dead already. Maybe you should’ve pretended like you weren’t home and let Minji knock on your door until she’d give up, but even you knew better than that. 

It was better to face her now than to deal with her accumulated wrath later.

‘‘When were you going to tell me?’’ She suddenly asks and it takes you by surprise because it had been way too silent since you had let her in.

Minji works like a predator, she attacks when you least expect it and right now you definitely feel like you’re about to be eaten. 

‘‘I─uh…’’ 

She sighs and you can see the disappointment in her face, ‘‘Were you going to tell me at all?’’ 

You nod instead, not trusting yourself enough to speak at the moment. 

It had been a week since the event in your living room and it makes you shift uncomfortably in your chair as you stare at your friend, who’s sitting on the couch where everything went down. 

‘‘Then why did I have to find out through Taehyung?’’ She asks in a disappointed tone. 

You figured he’d tell her. It’s not like you asked him not to do so, but you had silently prayed that the universe was on your side on this one and by some unknown reason they wouldn’t bump into each other at work and Minji, like she usually did, wouldn’t ask him about you. Because if she did, then he’d have to explain how you had broken the news that you had made out with your best friend; the one Minji despised with her soul. 

A sigh escapes your lips as you lower your head with shame.

You were supposed to tell her, but every time you took your phone and tried to dial or text her, your nerves got the best of you and ended up chickening out, promising that you’d do it the next day. Then the next day. And the next day. 

It’s not like you’re scared of Minji─well, maybe only slightly. But you know the effort she put into getting you to go out and meet someone new, someone that’s not married and not a father. She’s known Taehyung for so long, probably even told him how much of a good girl you were to convince him to take you out, only for you to end up throwing all of that in the trash like it was nothing. 

Minji’s also spent years pushing you to move on from your friendship with Jungkook. Not just because she doesn’t like him, but because she’s always felt like he’s held you back while he’s made his way in life. You’ve stuck behind him making sure that he’s okay and happy, forgetting about yourself in the process. 

‘‘I’m not angry at you,’’ she speaks softly, making you look up at her with surprise. ‘‘I just─He gave you a second chance, Y/N. Why did you say no?’’ Her words are laced with curiosity and you know that she’s asking because even Taehyung wasn’t able to give her an answer to this question. 

Your bottom lip trembles and you’re trying your hardest not to burst into tears in front of him. You can’t and you won’t. How even dare you to do that? 

‘‘I’m sorry,’’ you whisper and your eyes shift down to the wooden floor of his apartment. ‘‘I’m sorry, Taehyung.’’ You repeat, knowing it’s not enough.

Taehyung gulps and his crossed arms quickly fall to his sides as he realizes that, whatever anger he felt when you told him about what you did, was no longer there the moment he saw how genuinely apologetic you looked. 

‘‘I’m an idiot, I know.’’ You continue, rubbing your clammy hands into the material of your leggings and it does nothing to dry them. ‘‘I’m sorry, Taehyung.’’

He knows he shouldn't be so easily swayed by your apology, but he can’t help but want to cradle you in his arms. And when he does, your eyebrows raise in surprise as you gasp because you weren’t expecting this. 

You expected anger, insults thrown out about how you’re a slut and being kicked out of his apartment with him telling you to never contact him again. 

Taehyung’s still sweet even when his heart is getting broken. 

‘‘It’s okay,’’ he whispers into your hair as one of his hands runs up and down your back ‘‘we can work this out, yeah?’’ 

You bite the tip of your tongue as you take his words in, feeling your heart speeding up even faster than what it was when you spilled everything out on him. Maybe you would’ve preferred him getting angry than his current reaction.

‘‘It’s not like we were exclusive, right?’’ Taehyung chuckles, but it feels like he’s convincing himself that that was the reason as to why it happened. ‘‘Let’s forget it, seriously.’’

A shaky sigh comes out of your mouth as your arms, that hadn’t reciprocated his hug, gain the strength to separate yourself from him. He looks taken aback, but he’s waiting for you to reply in agreement because, yes, you could work this out if you try hard enough. 

But that’s not realistic. Pretending like you never kissed Jungkook is not realistic at all, because it’s sad to admit that you won’t be able to kiss Taehyung again without thinking about your best friend in the back of your head as you’re reminded that not only did you let him kiss you, but you reciprocated and not only did you reciprocate, but you liked it a little too much. 

‘‘Y/N,’’ he speaks up, snapping you from your thoughts,‘‘please, let’s just try.’’ He silently asks─no, begs. 

The barking of his dog, Yeontan, startles you as you come to stare at the little dog at the feet of his owner, who at the moment isn’t interested to see what he wants. You never told Taehyung, but the teacup pomeranian was extremely overprotective of him. 

He’s barking at you like you’re hurting his owner and maybe you aren’t physically doing any damage, but you know that you’re about to break his heart all over again.

‘‘I-I…,’’ you blink as you try to focus on the man in front of you and not the dog on the ground, ‘‘I’m sorry, I can’t.’’ 

Yeontan’s barks increase and Taehyung is at a loss for words to beg you to stay and talk things through. You can still hear the dog’s incessant barking as you make your way down the hall and that’s when the tears you were holding finally fall down. 

‘‘Taehyung’s a nice guy, Y/N. He forgave you and you just left?’’ Minji asks, disbelief in her tone. ‘‘I thought you liked him.’’

‘‘I do!’’ You finally speak up. You’re sure of it, you like Taehyung. Your friend gives you a puzzled look because she really can’t understand you right now. ‘‘I like Taehyung, I really do,’’ you mutter, ‘‘but it’s not fair to him.’’ 

Minji scrunches her face up because there’s only one reason you’re thinking that way. She’s tired of this narrative, it’s old and overdone and it should’ve ended years ago.

She lets out a breathless chuckle, ‘‘You love him, don’t you?’’ Another question that takes you by surprise.

‘‘No, I just─’’

Minji holds her finger up, interrupting you, ‘‘I’m talking about Jungkook.’’ 

This is the attack. Not the other questions she had asked you regarding her old family friend. Not the unannounced arrival to your apartment on an uneventful Saturday morning where you had chosen to stay in bed instead of facing the peaceful yoga instructor. Not the glaring looks she had been giving you for the last minutes.

And if you weren’t ready for any of those, this one definitely takes the prize. 

‘‘I-I of course I love him,’’ you mumble, ‘‘he’s my friend.’’

Minji smirks as her eyebrows raise, ‘‘No, I’m asking if you’re in love him.’’ 

You’re sure that the feelings that you’ve had for Jungkook have always been platonic. You do love him because he’s your friend and you’re supposed to love your friends. But you know that the love that you have for him is very different from the one you have for anyone else. It might be the history between you two. You’ve been with him through it all, cheering from the sidelines as he accomplishes one milestone after the other. 

‘‘Be honest with me,’’ Minji demands, ‘‘are you in love with Jungkook?’’ she asks once again.

Your eyes well up and your bottom lip is trembling as you look back at your intimidating best friend because your silence is deafening and you’re expecting her to throw the last blow. You think you deserve it. Minji has so much she wants to say, but you look so dejected and she figures that you might’ve just realized it. 

‘‘Hey, it’s okay.’’ She comes up to you quickly, crouching down as she looks up at the tears rolling down your reddened cheeks. ‘‘Y/N, it’s okay.’’ 

You’ve been trying to tell yourself the same thing the past few days. 

It’s okay that you kissed your best friend. It’s okay that you’ve slowly and silently started harbouring feelings for him. It’s okay that you just realized you’ve been in love with him for a while now. It’s okay that you’ve been resenting the fact that he didn’t choose you all those years ago. It’s okay that you take care of and love his daughter like she’s yours. 

But...

‘‘No, it’s not.’’ You cry, ‘‘I can’t do that, Minji, he’s not mine to have.’’ 

Your mind quickly brings you back to the harsh reality, which is that Jungkook will never be yours. He probably only kissed you because he was looking for something that was capable of exciting him again after realizing how bored of his marriage he is. He doesn’t love you like that, he’ll never love you like that.

Minji can’t disagree with what you just said, but she also feels like right now is not the time to make you feel even worse when it’s obvious you’re already there. 

‘‘I blocked his number, anyway.’’ You mumble out, wiping away your tears. 

Your friend’s eyes widened at the revelation, ‘‘What?’’. 

‘‘I freaked out after I talked to Taehyung because I felt so guilty and you know how I don’t know how to deal with shit ever, so I just─’’ You stop yourself from rambling and sigh as you feel Minji’s hand squeezing your knee as a sign of comfort, ‘‘I can’t see him again without thinking about it. I can’t take care of Sunhi knowing he’s going home to sleep with Jiwoo. I just can’t keep pretending anymore.’’ 

Minji can’t do much after that, you’ve become a sobbing mess and the tears seem unstoppable. She’s never seen you like this and it dawns on her that you’ve held all of this in for way too long. 

It’s ironic because she’s always told you that you need space from Jungkook, thinking it’d be good for you to finally realize that you’re not part of his list of priorities anymore and hadn’t been for a long time. 

But she hadn’t taken into account what the after effects of not having him in your life anymore would look like.

[12:03 PM] Jeon Jungkook: hi y/n 

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[12:04 PM] Jeon Jungkook: hey???

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[12:07 PM] Jeon Jungkook: i wanted to see if you’d like to meet up for lunch one of these days? i feel like we need to talk 

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[5:13 PM] Jeon Jungkook: does this work now??

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Jungkook groans in annoyance as he finds another one of his texts left undelivered. It feels like life is either against him or doing this for his own good. 

Nonetheless, he wants to talk to you because it’s been a few days since he last saw and heard from you. He figures you’re mad, the last words you spoke to him didn’t sound friendly at all and he wonders if maybe leaving without saying goodbye that day was the right thing to do. 

The small snores coming from beside him make him realize Sunhi is finally asleep and he can’t help but let out a sigh of disappointment as he watches her curl into a fetal like position, clutching her Dumbo plush toy and slightly drooling into his favorite pillow, making him pout because he knows he won’t be able to pry it away from her when he decides to fall asleep too. 

Sunhi being fast asleep is supposed to bring peace to Jungkook’s tiring day, though the silence is extremely uncomfortable and these days he’s come to realize how much he rather have his daughter running around and yelling in excitement than this.

Complete and utter silence.

[7:13 PM] Jeon Jungkook: (1.jpg attached) sunhi misses auntie y/n!! she’s been asking me about you a lot 

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[7:15 PM] Jeon Jungkook: i miss auntie y/n more tho…

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[7:17 PM] Jeon Jungkook: i hope ur alright :)

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‘‘Pumpkin, you can stop smiling already.’’ Jungkook chuckles as he looks up from his phone, noticing his daughter still holding the big smile he had given him when he requested to take a picture of her to send to you. ‘‘I already sent the picture to Auntie Y/N.’’ He informs and she sighs with relief, massaging her cheeks from straining them too hard.

Though his eyebrows furrow, noticing his messages have once again been left undelivered. He makes a mental note to call the phone company soon, because it’s been over a week since he last sent the first messages and those remained in the same state as well. 

‘‘Daddy, unpause!’’ Sunhi demands, making him realize that he’s in the middle of showing her his favorite Pixar movie, Cars. 

Twenty minutes had passed and for a majority of them Sunhi had only watched attentively and Jungkook looked over at her every other second just to make sure she hadn’t fallen asleep. Warmness spread throughout him as he noticed his daughter looking at the screen with those big doe eyes she had inherited from him. 

Once the scene where Sally shows Lightning McQueen around Radiator Springs, Jungkook feels a tug at his sweatshirt and looks down to notice Sunhi’s little hand grabbing at the fabric, her eyes are still glued to the screen.

“Auntie Y/N likes this too?” She asks and Jungkook chuckles because his daughter can’t stop thinking about his friend even when doing anything completely unrelated to you.

Maybe that’s another thing she inherited as well.

[7:03 PM] Jeon Jungkook: so i called my phone company and asked them abt why my messages aren’t being delivered and they said that you must’ve blocked me

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[7:04 PM] Jeon Jungkook: yeah i guess you did

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Jungkook’s mind has gone blank ever since he got off the phone with the cellphone company. 

The idea that you might’ve blocked his number had not once crossed his mind during the weeks of undelivered texts and phone calls sent straight to voicemail. It was obvious, but he didn’t think you’d be capable of doing it. 

He wanted it to be a network issue or something else that he could put blame on instead of facing the realization that you had shut him out from your life. And that thought hurt, no─stung him. 

The worst part is that he knows he deserves it. It was foolish of him to think that you had enjoyed the kiss too. Dumb enough to believe that you might’ve reciprocated the way he felt. 

Jungkook doesn’t want to think this is the end, maybe it’s that stupid voice inside his head that always holds on to things that he knows he should let go of. But he can’t just let go of this and move on. 

He doesn’t remember what life was like before you and he sure as hell does not want to know what it’ll be like without you.

[1:30 AM] Jeon Jungkook: i miss you so fucking much i’m sorry if i knew that kissing you would’ve fucked everything up htne i woudl’ve never done it y/n i’m sorry 

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[1:31 AM] Jeon Jungkook: i really wanted to kiss you but it was selfish of me to do it i didnt think about what you must’ve felt im sos sorry 

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[1:32 AM] Jeon Jungkook: sunhi’s been asking me about yoj and i dont even know what to say anymore

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[2:27 AM] Jeon Jungkook: i don’t even care if you dont wanna speak to me anymore i fucked this up for sunhi she loves you so much and you’re her favorite person ever and i ruined it for her just bc i wanted to see if you felt the same way as i do

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[3:50 AM] Jeon Jungkook: i miss you y/n i really do 

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“Daddy, lemme go!” Sunhi whines trying to escape from her father’s hands as he finishes applying the sunscreen on her arms, “Daddy!”.

He gives her a stern look and the toddler huffs, sticking her bottom lip out in an act of annoyance. The playground games are waiting for her and she feels like her dad is just coming between them and her.

“Alright,” he pats his big hands on her tiny arms, “you’re good to—“ Jungkook isn’t able to finish his sentence because his daughter’s already running towards one of the slides, “Sunhi, be careful!” He reminds her, but she’s too focused on the rides than on her dad’s warning.

Jungkook sighs and relaxes into the bench. 

“She’s precious,” She comments with a small smile as her attention focuses on the little girl having the time of her life going down the slide, “I’m surprised she’s yours.” 

Jungkook looks over at the woman beside him and scoffs, but he can’t help but agree. Sunhi is too good and too pure, the best thing he’s ever done in his life. 

“Yeah, well, it’s all her.” Jungkook admits, eyes focusing back on Sunhi, “She’s really great.” 

There’s an uncomfortable silence between them and Jungkook has to clear his throat to gain her attention. 

“I’m sorry I couldn’t meet up at a café,” Jungkook apologizes and nods over at his daughter, “she’s been a little misbehaved lately, you said you wanted to talk to me and I figured that if I took Sunhi to a place like that she’d just—“

She interrupts his rambling, “Hey, it’s okay. I have no problem, really.” She assures him and he nods slightly, “I haven’t been in a place like this in a long time.” 

Jungkook scratches the back of his neck and glances over at the woman who’s looking at him with an expression he can’t quite pinpoint. It makes him so nervous that he quickly shifts his gaze to the ground.

“This is so weird.” He admits with an awkward chuckle and she raises her eyebrow, “I mean—you hate me, Minji, so I don’t know what you want to talk about.” 

“I don’t hate you!” Minji laughs and Jungkook finally looks at her and she falters, “Seriously! I only dislike you and that’s saying a lot.” 

He supposes that’s a good thing, considering how aggressive Minji used to be towards him back in college. Always letting him know how much she despised his guts, how he didn’t deserve to have you as his friend and even once threw a drink at his face during a party; though you swore to him she was drunk and that she didn’t mean it.

Jungkook hadn’t seen her much since, only a few times if it was your birthday and they managed to cross paths, because the girl made sure she was never in the same room as him. The times it happened, he felt like she was throwing daggers at him through her eyes. 

“It always bothered me how putty in your hands she was for you,” Minji begins, crossing her arms over her chest as she settles back into the bench, “and how oblivious you were about it.” 

Jungkook looks back at her and there’s a small smile on her face, most likely looking over at his daughter. 

“How when we got together for study sessions, she’d be tired because she was taking care of you the night before at one of those stupid frat parties you loved dragging her to.” Minji recalls and Jungkook feels like his mouth has gone dry from the memory.

She crosses one of her legs over the other, “Or that whole Jiwoo ordeal, how you had practically put Y/N aside once you managed to date the ‘campus hottie’.” She says with air quotes and Jungkook sighs, remembering the beginning of it all.

He knows that he can’t turn back time and change it all. Even if he could, he knows he wouldn’t. If there was no Jiwoo, there’d be no Sunhi. 

An excited yell startles him as he looks over at his daughter, swinging up and down. “Look, daddy! I'm flying!” She calls and he smiles at her. 

“Jesus, that’s fucking precious.” Minji mumbles, but he hears her nonetheless and nods in agreement. “Anyway, I’m not going to act like a saint here and pretend I was vouching for you, because I never did.” 

Jungkook knows. Back then he didn’t understand why Minji was so adamant about trash talking him to you, considering how he and her barely knew each other. Actually, whatever knowledge they had of the other was through of you. 

But Jungkook’s done a lot of self reflecting for the past month and a half and he’s realized why Minji disliked him so much. Or, dislikes. Either way, it’s valid.

“I just wanted her to snap out of it,” she confesses, “and realize that there is a life beyond you. That there’s more than being your best friend and your daughter’s babysitter. That she’s capable of moving on and putting you aside, because if you did that to her then why shouldn’t she?” 

Jungkook hadn’t thought about any of that at all. He had realized he had been a shitty friend, but the idea of just how much definitely hadn’t settled on him. He wishes you knew how much he’s cared about you, but that there were too many overlapping lines for him to ever express it.

“I thought that after setting her up with Taehyung she had finally realized it,” she continues “but you know how she is, she rarely lets up and I knew she wasn’t going to let you go that easily.” 

Jungkook draws in a long breath, rubbing his now clammy hands in his jeans as he looks back towards Minji. 

“I mean, she couldn’t let her go that easily.” She jerks her head towards Sunhi, still sitting on the swings, though she’s slowed down now. “She loves that little girl so damn much.” 

Jungkook’s sure of this. He recognizes the immense love you have for Sunhi, how sincere and unconditional it is. It’s the way a mother loves her child, though he never expected it to come from you instead. He’s not surprised though, because it’s the same love you gave to him. But it’s louder, there are no boundaries that you needed to respect to show Sunhi just how much you loved her, unlike with him. 

It dawns on him that cutting him off must’ve been hard. You probably wanted to do it for way longer and only stayed because of Sunhi and Jungkook doesn’t want to think about the dilemma you must’ve went through to finally do it this time around. 

He runs his hands through his hair, letting out a shaky breath, remembering that Sunhi doesn’t have you anymore. That’s the reason as to why she’s been so misbehaved lately, crying way too often, throwing tantrums over the smallest of things. Jungkook could blame it on the fact that she’s soon turning four and maybe it’s something that comes with age, it might just be a coincidence that she’s acting this way during a time you’re no longer present in her life.

This is the thing Sunhi might not be able to forgive him for.

“Minji,” he finally speaks up and the woman beside him focuses his gaze back on him, “I miss her so much.” He mumbles, not trusting himself to speak up because he might choke back a sob.

“Only now?” 

“No!” He says this a little too harshly and Minji jumps slightly at the tone in his voice, “I’ve always missed her and I’m fucking idiot for realizing too late.” 

She hums and Jungkook’s chest rises and falls with rapid breaths, “She’s my first thought when I wake up and when I finally manage to go to sleep. Sunhi constantly reminds me about her, asking me where she is and when can she see her and I have to force myself to lie.” 

Jungkook doesn’t realize Minji’s hand is now awkwardly placed on his back, hesitantly tapping as if to give him some comfort. It’s weird to see him like this, she had convinced herself that the guy didn’t have any feelings when it came to you.

“She blocked my number, I can’t call her and all my texts have been left undelivered. I’ve driven by her apartment building too many times with the plan to go up and talk to her, but I always back out because I’m an idiot and I know she’ll hate me if I do that and I—“

“Jungkook.” 

“I just want to know if she still cares, I don’t mind if she doesn’t feel the same way. But I want to know that Y/N still cares about Sunhi and me. Do you know? Does she? Could you please—“

Jungkook’s ramble is interrupted by the crying sounds of Sunhi, who’s now on the ground as she sobs and he quickly stands up to go straight towards her. He blinks away the tears that had formed in his eyes because there’s only room for one crying baby here.

“Pumpkin, what happened?” He asks in a soft voice, crouching down at her level and she’s pouting as she points at her bloody knee. “Did you fall down?” She nods and he sighs, picking her up as he takes her back to the bench where Minji waits with expectancy to check on the little girl.

Jungkook places Sunhi beside her and looks through his daughter’s bag for the emergency kit he carried around. He cleans the blood delicately with a gauze and alcohol, making the little girl wince and yelp out an ‘ouch!’ as she holds tightly to Minji’s thigh. 

“It’s okay, Pumpkin.” He reassures her with a smile, making his daughter nod because she trusts her dad, “It was an accident and accidents are part of growing up, right?” She nods again and Minji figures this isn’t a first for her.

Once the blood has been cleaned, Jungkook places a cute rainbow patterned bandaid on the wound in her knee. 

“There we go,” he announces and Sunhi lets out the breath she’d been holding, ‘‘all done! Are you good now?” 

“Yes,” Sunhi weakly replies, “daddy, I wanna go home.” 

Jungkook’s eyebrows raise in surprise, but the look on her face tells him that she’s probably still shaken by the accident and most likely wants to take a nap to forget about it.

He looks over at Minji with an apologetic look and she gives him half a smile, “Go, it’s alright.” 

Jungkook nods and takes Sunhi in his arms, which she gladly accepts and settles her head in the crook of his neck. Minji’s ready to leave, figuring there was no point in staying any longer.

“Minji, wait!” He stops her before she goes, making her turn around and offer him a curious look, “Sunhi’s birthday is in a few weeks and,” Jungkook reaches for something inside his daughter’s bag, “she really wants Y/N to be there.” He whispers, taking out a party invitation to hand over to Minji.

She smirks, looking at the personalized invitation for his daughter’s fourth birthday, “Just Sunhi?” She asks and he lets out a breathless laugh.

“Me too.” Jungkook adds and a small smile appears on his face as he says it. “Uh—thank you for talking to me, I know it must’ve been hard.” 

Minji swats her hand in the air, “It’s alright, just wanted to make sure how you and the kid were doing. It’s all she talks about anyway.” 

A gasp escapes his lips and he holds on to his daughter tighter as she nuzzles her face farther in. 

“I’ll give her the card, but—I can’t guarantee if she’ll go.” She warns and he nods, understanding.

Though he does not like the possible outcome, he settles down with the idea that you’ll notice how even though you both haven’t spoken towards each other in almost two months, he’s still thinking about you either way. Every day. 

#jungkook angst #jungkook au #jungkook smut #jungkook scenario #jungkook fic #jungkook fluff #bts fanfic #bts smut #f: chasing pavements

[caxsthetic]

I Am Fine

Miya Osamu x F!Reader

A Whisper: I am sorry, I never want to hurt someone, let alone you who always be there for me. I am sorry, for every time I take a look at you — I saw him instead.

Akagi’s ⇚ Through Her Eyes

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *. GRAND MASTERLIST .* :☆ﾟ. ───

To you, having someone that you could love until the end of time was surely a blessing. For the past years of your life, you had that. For the past years of your life, you were blessed by the existence of someone that made you feel complete, that made you feel so alive every time you woke up with him by your side.

His touch was so gentle. His fingers always tucked the strands of your hair behind your ear. The reason for that was simple — he wanted to see you more clearly. He wanted to gaze at your eyes, the gentle, silvery warm orbs that filled with affection.

The love that you had for him was something out of this world. Something that even his twin brother and teammates get jealous of. You dropped everything, your long time dream which, if you had pursued it, would take you thousands of kilometres apart from him. Why? Because you wanted to be with him — and every dream that he had was bound to be yours in the end.

So you couldn’t really blame them if he would be treated differently after what he had done to you.

Sometimes you asked yourself what would happen if you didn’t fall in love with him, you wanted to know another scenario that could have unfurled in your life if only he was not the one who had your heart. Would it be the same? Would you still feel this immense pain that kept hurting you with every breath that you take?

Or would you get your happily ever after?

You eyed two bottles of sleeping pills in your hand. One that felt like hope since the dose was lowered, a sign that you were starting to get better. But the other one, you needed to lie to get the other one.

Your upperclassmen was sharp, you could see the hesitation on his face as he got the sleeping pills for you. You shouldn’t have asked him, you shouldn’t have lied and given him hope that you would be fine. Saying that you would be there standing tall at the wedding venue of your brother and someone that you loved.

It was all a lie, you had lost in this game of life as it brought you nothing but guilt and heartbreak. So you opened up the two bottles simultaneously.

“I am sorry, Akagi-san.”

Because now, falling into a deep slumber until someone woke you up, sounded like the best decision that you could take.

“Slow down or you will choke yourself, dumdum.” Hearing the nickname made you roll your eyes. You didn’t hear him out though, and kept shoving the quiche in front of you without resting. “(Y/n), oi!”

As if on cue, you swallowed a little too fast and choked at the food. The blonde setter could only shake his head in disappointment on seeing you like this, but the way his lips quirked up in amusement could make everyone see how the man was not really disgruntled by your action. “I told you so.” He opened up a bottle of mineral water and handed it to you.

You snatched the drink from his hand and gulped it all down in one take. The second you slammed the bottle on the table, you eyed the expression that belonged to your company. His amber orbs looked at you with shock written all over his face, mouth agape as he couldn’t believe you just gulped down half a litre of water.

“What?”

“You are one crazy bitch.” He chuckled before his fork took the last bite of your quiche and threw it inside his mouth. And before you could protest, he opened up his lips once again. “I am the one who paid.” He said it with his mouth still full with the bite, making some of the crumbs spills all over the table.

Grimacing, you dusted away all the grains with a tissue. Somehow wondering why you agreed to go out with him in the first place.

“Ugh, fine.”

You groaned and averted your gaze outside the window, occupying yourself while waiting for him to finish his own meal. You remembered that he was the one who treated you today, saying that it was a celebration since it was the first time you were out of your hours after weeks swallowing yourself with pain and tears all alone.

There was something about Atsumu that somehow gave you warm feelings that you thought you would never have again. The night you stepped outside your home without a ring band adorning your finger, you were sure that you left all the love and joy inside that place.

You were sure that you would never have a chance to feel the same warmth that you used to share with the black-haired man.

Yet you felt it, you didn’t know what kind of miracle happened every time the blonde setter popped out in front of your house, but you felt like your heart was never shattered in the first place — as if it was always intact, as if all of the pain that you felt was just a nightmare that was gone the second you wake up.

You kept falling deep into his eyes, the beautiful shape of orbs that captivated you every time his gaze fell on your face. It was filled with affection and care, a gaze that you were addicted to. Since sometimes you could see him looking at you with — fondness.

He was the one who you usually saw in the morning, he was the one who offered you his embrace for you to cry on, he was the one who kept putting a smile on your face even without him trying. And somewhere along the line, you felt like he always owned your heart.

“Hey, (Y/n).”

You smiled as you peered outside the window and noticed the dark skies. Then again, even though the freezing rain started to fall outside, you were sure that it would not make you feel any less warm as long as you were with him.

“(Y/n)?”

“Yes, love?”

And then there was silence.

His orbs blinked as he could not believe to hear such nicknames coming from your lips. It was so natural the way you said it, as if you practised that for hours in front of the mirror. No, not like that. It was as if you had called him like that for the past years of your life.

Your whole body tensed as you saw something else inside his orbs. There was something — yearning, lingering there as his face lit up. But it was amber, the gaze that now met with yours was amber. Not silver, not the greyish stone colour that you always ended up staring at for hours.

You inhaled sharply as your mind tried to tell you something, something so wrong that you were now disgusted with yourself as the realisation sunk in.

Without wasting another second, you immediately grabbed your bag and stood up, striding towards the exit and kept your head hanging low. You kept your gaze to the front and just barged into the heavy rain, not caring at how he shouted out your name from inside the cafe.

You really wanted to take another look at him, just to lock the realisation deep inside your soul. You wanted to be selfish, just for once.

But you couldn’t.

You felt someone gripped on your wrist, so tight as if they knew you would be gone if they let you go. It was so rough, calloused fingers wrapped around your wrist to remind you that he was not the same person that broke your heart — yet it was the same contact that you used to feel.

You missed this kind of touch, the sign of hard work that for the past year you couldn’t find from someone who was once your lover, Miya Osamu. Ever since he was focused more on the business and spending more time with you, his hands became so different. It became — soft.

From cutting ingredients on the kitchen, to typing away reports inside the office. From spending time on different kinds of branches, to lazing around inside the house that you two shared. From having you in his embrace, to getting into bed with another person.

And right now as you turned your head to face the man who had been trying to pick up all of your shattered pieces, you couldn’t look at him the same anymore.

Because when you looked at his amber eyes, you could only think of the silvery one.

“Hey, what happened?” His voice was so soft, filled with worry as he tried to pull you to shelter, yet you didn’t budge. “(Y/n), I am sorry. Did I do something wrong?”

It was not fair, not fair to him. All this time you have been looking at him while thinking of someone else. Every time you saw him smile at you as he greeted you in front of your door, it was his twin that always popped out in your mind. And yet he was here right now, gazing at you with the same look that he always gave to you.

“N-No, you didn’t say or do anything wrong.” Your mind tried to utter any words that could make him understand. “It was me, A-Atsumu. Not you, I am the one who did something.”

“Alright, we can talk it out.” His grip was now loosened, eyes begging for you to follow him back inside. “You can always talk to me about anything, I will listen.”

“You won’t like this one.” You snorted as your empty heart now started to get filled with something else. “You will hate me, Atsumu.” Something else called guilt.

The blonde setter cocked one of his eyebrows in confusion, eyes scanning yours in search of some kind of sign. You looked so scared, and he wanted nothing more than to pull you into his embrace. But as he took another step toward you, you immediately took a step backwards.

“I could never hate you, (Y/n).” He whispered under his breath. So low, yet enough for you to hear. “From all things that I have ever seen in life, you are one that I could never hate. Even if I tried to.”

There was sincerity lingered on his voice, and it made you feel even worse for every second passed he stood here with you under the rain. “Nothing, there’s nothing you could do to make me hate you.”

“Because you don’t know what’s inside my head, Atsumu.”

“Still, I am sure that—”

“I see Samu in you for god sake!”

And when you could not feel his hand wrapped around your wrist anymore, you knew that your confession was so much more impactful than it was supposed to.

From the ten years of knowing Miya Atsumu, you could see that he was a man full of pride. He refused to be acknowledged as the same as his twin brother. The two of them were always so competitive, almost about anything that they encountered. Even if they cared for each other, even if they always had each other’s back, they never liked to be seen as the other twin.

“What? What do you mean?”

He knew, of course he knew what that meant. But he didn’t want to believe that as he wanted to embrace the tingle inside his heart when you looked at him. Atsumu wanted to believe that when your orbs glimmered with love every time your eyes fell on his figure, it was him that you saw — not Osamu, not his twin brother who already wrecked your heart apart.

“I always see him, Atsumu.” You continued your words as you wrapped your hands up and down on your arms. “When you smiled at me, it was the same smile that he always gave me.” Your voice wavered as you stared at the man who had done nothing but care for your wellbeing. “And when I look at your eyes, Atsumu, I—”

I see love.

Your lips parted, not caring anymore as the droplets of rain made its way inside your mouth. The reason why you thought he was the answer to your prayer, why you thought he was the miracle that God bestowed upon you, why you thought maybe he could be the end of your suffering — it was not because he was the cure to your heart.

But it was because you saw someone who owned your heart and soul inside of him.

Because the amber orbs looked at you like how the black-haired man used to look at you — one gaze filled with love.

You found one expression dominating his facade right now. Hurt. It was shown all over his face as he realised what you were trying to say. It was as if he could read your mind as you took some steps backward, shaking your head softly, begging him not to follow you this time.

When your eyes lingered on his figure, shoulders slumped with remorse evident on his face, you wondered if that was how you looked the night Osamu confessed the things that he had done. Nothing but pain and betrayal that he couldn’t seem to shake. Atsumu had given you the love that you lost, trying to aid your heart little by little.

But it wouldn’t work, you knew your own heart — it would never work. You could never see him without seeing someone else, you could never see him without the shadows of his twin brother. So you had to leave, you needed to stop showing him something that you could never give.

You needed to stop giving him your love, one that was never meant for him.

Throwing the bottles of pills into the sink, you gulped down lots of water before letting your feet bring you towards the tub. You gently took off the bathrobe that wrapped around your figure, shielding you from the shivering atmosphere of winter.

Your orbs fell on the milky white water that filled your bathtub, caused by the bath bomb which you bought all those months ago. You remembered your love told you about how the aromas smelled like home. Like it was a fine morning where the two of you huddled up in the arms of each other.

He tended to love his coffee with milk, so one thing that you always did when you woke up first, was to make him a cup of coffee just how he likes it. A spoonful of sugar, a half-cup filled with black coffee, and the rest with full cream milk.

If you calling out his name couldn’t even wake him up, the aroma of the freshly brewed coffee was enough. His nose would twitch as the smell fulfilled the entire room, and seconds later, his eyes would open and show off the beautiful silvery orbs that you could never get tired of.

And now as you rested your head at the edge of the tub, gazing at the ceiling, you wondered if it felt the same — every morning that he woke up to.

Your mind kept flickering back and forth to the twins. How one of them had your heart yet didn’t need it anymore, while the other wanted your heart yet you could never give it to. It frustrated you beyond anything to know that someone held out his heart for you to take, yet you knew you couldn’t do the same to him, since once you loved someone it was meant to last forever.

There would always be a trace, no matter how many years went by. Maybe once upon a time, you did love the blonde setter. But you never invested yourself in the feelings, making it difficult to make bloom the same kind of love like what you had for the black-haired man.

It was still engraved into your mind, the look on Atsumu’s face as you confessed about how he was just a lookalike. That no matter how much effort that he did to you — at the end of the day everything about him only reminded you of his twin brother.

And you couldn’t bear it anymore.

It was alright, to be the one who got hurt. To be the one who felt the pain of losing someone you loved until death came knocking at your door. It was alright to know that everything wouldn’t be fine, as long as it was just you, it was fine, you could take it.

But to meet a pair of amber eyes, filled with hope as it asked for your love — it broke you beyond repair once you realised it would never be him that your heart wanted. Because when you gazed at those warm eyes, a flicker of someone else took over in an instant.

When you reached for Atsumu, you were reaching for his twin brother. When you laughed with him, you felt like you were laughing with the love of your life instead of him. And you knew damn well it was wrong, you knew that your existence became a curse.

You didn’t bother to wipe the tears that slowly cascaded down your cheek. It dripped, one by one, mixed with the milky white substance that enveloped your whole body.

Surely you never thought that someone like Miya Osamu would do something as low as cheating. To betray the love that you have given to him for the majority of your life. You had given everything to him, mustering all of your energy to make sure that you win in this life — together.

But he let go of your hand, leaving you alone as you get lost in the dark, aching for his hand to guide you back to life.

And when you could finally stand all alone, it was not tall and mighty like how it used to. Since every time you turned around you were haunted by him and how his hand held another. Someone that was not you, someone that tragically — you had given everything too.

“The superior twin is here!”

You bit your lips as his voice ranged through the entire room. How could he still sound so cheery, so carefree even though he must have known too well that you could never give him what he asked you to. “I am serious though, I am older, therefore I am superior.”

He didn’t deserve it, to be seen as someone else. He had his own halo, shone so bright as everyone could see that he was the sun while his twin brother was the moon. Yet there you were, always comparing, always seeing the black-haired man instead of him.

“I don’t know where you got that way of thinking, but I will let it slide for you.” You answered, cringing at your own voice as it sounded weak. Right now you hope that he couldn’t hear the splash of water as you tried to be as still as ever.

“Ah, miss (Y/n), always so humble.” He chuckled a little. It was contagious, how his laugh could make your lips shaped into a genuine smile. “Say, what have I done to get such privilege hearing your voice?”

You sighed softly, feeling that you were the one who had the privilege hearing his voice for the past few weeks. He could have gone to practice sooner, but he decided to check up on you first. He could have gone somewhere with his teammates, but he thought spending time with you was important.

He prioritised you more than anything, just like how you always prioritised his twin brother above anything else.

“I just need company, Atsumu.” You breathed out softly, hands accidentally knocked the bottle of soap off to the tub. “Are you busy helping around the wedding?”

“No, I am not busy. Not at all.” From how quiet the other line was, you knew that he was probably not going to the wedding. You really wanted to scold him, telling him that he should have gone there and supported his twin brother — but you didn’t have the energy to do so. “I am here, (Y/n). I am always here if you need me.”

“Yeah?” You purse your lips when the words rolled down his tongue. So honest as he gave you a flicker of warm that makes you feel wanted. “Then, would you tell me a story? Anything? I just want to listen to your voice.”

His voice was a little more pitched than Osamu, intonation always went up and down, never once steady. But there was this similarity that you loved to hear as he talked to you. You felt like you were wanted, as if when he had a conversation with you he was talking to someone that he wanted to keep in his life.

And you were so disgusted with yourself all over again, for even when the countdown started, you still hoped for the love that you had lost from your brother.

“Since you asked so nicely.”

He made you feel at peace. As you closed your eyes and listened on and on to his voice. Just like how you predicted, his intonation went up and down as he blurted out all random things that he could collect from his mind.

It made you remember all those beautiful high school days. Atsumu always jogged towards you the second you walked into the gymnasium with your brother and his twin. He loved to snitch Osamu so bad, making the poor younger twin tense up and pout since now you and the others knew all the embarrassing things that he had done.

Though you always stole a little bit of his time before practice started. Your hand interlaced with the silvery eyed man as you reassured him that no matter how many embarrassing things that he did, it could never change the way you looked at him.

The setter would boo at the two of you for sharing PDA inside the gymnasium, while your brother would mostly send a glare to the blonde for interrupting such a thing. You and him just chuckled at this, and he would give you a soft kiss on your lips — to tell you that he loves you — before finally running towards the court where the others were waiting.

Each one of them was your everything. So you knew it was the right thing to do to call someone that could bring you back to the happiest year of your life.

When life just seemed so perfect, when everything felt so right.

“Hey, Atsumu.”

“Hm?”

“Thank you.”

And you wished, that someday when God permits you to meet them again,

Everything would be just — fine.

Tagged Lovelies:

@muffins-puffins​ @quirksandbreaths @vlovers-world @blacckdiamondposts @atsunflower @hihiq @the-fandom-ness @murasakibaraa @verbluehte @simp4tsukkii @ladyalicevii @evermorehaikyuu @clowninfortodoroki @koutaroulovebot @fitriiaw @mistypoison @aquariarose @greenleaf-fantasy @t-amajiki @kuraomi @haikyuuwithadashofart @starbybokuto @shiningstar-byulxx @nerdyphantomlady @raequii @akasuns @sugawsites @macaronnv @spicyfoodboi @killuaking @edvigelacivetta + @yoitsseulgi @hhwangguttu @aurorahoneybuns​

#haikyuu x reader #haikyuu angst #haikyuu scenarios #haikyuu imagine #haikyuu!! #haikyuu #miya osamu x reader #miya osamu angst #miya osamu imagine #miya osamu scenario #tw implied suicide #tw overdose

[enbyprentiss]

Roommates

Genre: fluff, i guess? maybe some angst if you squint.

Spencer x Fem!Reader

(Y/N and Spencer are in college but he's aged up so they're both 18. italicized is Spencer's thoughts)

CW: implied roofie (nothing bad happens)

Part ll (contains smut)

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Our college has coed dorms. Which could be very unfortunate for some girls. However, I somehow was blessed with the beauty of a human that is Spencer Reid. He's a genius, a germaphobe, a bit of a loner but I'm cool with that--you get the idea, just overall a pretty dope kid. I always felt kinda bad whenever I stumbled into our dorm after parties, clearly drunk off my ass but always tried not to wake him up. I usually did though. Oops. We got along pretty well from the start. Despite what people might think about the lanky boy, he's actually quite funny. Ok, well not many people around here would understand his humor. But I do, and I love it. I was able to get him to break out of his shell a little bit, mostly by introducing him to my friends. We were both chemistry majors which is nice. Mostly because when I get stuck he's willing to spend hours explaining until I understand.

"Hey, Spence.", I walked into our room after my lecture. He didn't respond. He just stood there wide-eyed, "Are you....ok?", it wasn't until that moment that my brain processed what I was seeing. Spencer was standing there in just his boxers, not that I thought that was a big deal but, "Oh! I'm sorry--do you want me to um leave? I--"

He still didn't respond, just shrugged in a panic, "I'm sorry! I'll leave!", I called back as I closed the door behind me.

"Y/N, you can come back in now.", he cracked the door open behind me. Honestly, I didn't even realize I was still standing there.

"I'm really sorry, Spence."

"It's ok. Could've been worse."

I giggled at what he was implying while leaning against my bunk, "Well, we should probably go grocery shopping because I don't know if I can handle more dining hall food."

"Yeah, ok."

"Can I borrow a sweater?", he nodded turning towards his dresser to get one. Not necessary, as I had already taken the one that was laying on his bed.

"Why would you wear that one? It smells like me.", he laughed.

"Yeah, that's why I want it.", poor thing is so clueless.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I was disoriented. Not like drunk. Well, yes I was drunk. But it was something more than that. My legs felt wobbly. My vision felt blurry. I could barely keep my eyes open. Something just felt...wrong. So, I did the only thing that seemed to make sense.

"Hello?", he sounded tired.

"Sp--Spencer?"

"Y/N, are you ok?", Spencer sat up more on the other line. It wasn't rare for Y/N to call him when she was out but he always worried when she did.

"I--I don't...think so.", he could hear her words were coming out slurred and in between heavy breaths.

"What do you mean?", he tried not to sound panicked, not wanting to worry her more.

"I think....I think someone might've--slipped something into my drink."

"Can you walk?"

"I-I don't know!"

"Hey, don't panic, ok?"

"Yeah--yeah...ok."

"Do you know where you are?"

"The bar down the street."

"Ok, just--hold on. Don't talk to anyone.", he hung up quickly. Walking down the stairs and starting Y/N's car. Spencer found her sitting on the curb with her head in her hands, "Y/N?"

I looked up at him the best I could and I could feel the tears in my eyes well, "It's ok. I promise.", he put his hand out to pull me up and swung my arm over his shoulder, "Do you trust me?"

"Yes."

"It sounds crazy, but I need you to throw up ok?", I nodded, "I'm sorry.", he whispered as he stuck his fingers in my mouth to make me gag. It worked.

It hurt Spencer seeing her like this. Panicked, confused, and hurting.

He swept me off my feet, carrying me into the car and handing me a water bottle.

"Don't drink it that fast, you might choke."

Spencer threw me over his shoulder and carried me into our room. If I wasn't so disoriented, I probably would've been surprised by his strength. He poured me a cup of pedialyte before sitting next to me on my bed to make sure I didn't fall forward or hit my head on the wall. We sat in silence for a while until words started pouring out of my mouth without me even realizing.

"Have I ever told you how much I love you?"

She doesn't mean that. She's confused.

"Spencer?"

"Yeah?"

"Have I?"

"I-I- - no, but you don't mean that. There's this thing called transference. You think that you love me because I helped you out of what could've been a really bad situation."

"That's gotta be the dumbest thing you've ever said."

What? No, that's a real thing. What if she really did mean it? No. Y/N doesn't like people like me.

"Spencer, I have loved you since the very first week we moved into together."

"R-really?"

"Yes! I don't know how you never caught on. I love everything about you."

"L-like what?"

"Well, first off you have incredible bone structure, the cutest curly brown hair, and doe like eyes. All of which are a huge plus. You're smart and funny without even trying. I like that you dress like you're one of the professors. And that I'm the only person that gets to see you in sweatpants and a hoodie. And that you'll let me wear them too. Even though, I have plenty of my own clothes. The list goes on forever really."

You're being stupid. She won't even remember any of this in the morning.

"Spencer?...I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said anything."

"No! It's ok. I just- - I don't think you're gonna remember any of this tomorrow."

"That may be true, but at least you'll finally know how I really feel."

What am I gonna do when she doesn't remember? How am I supposed to keep this all a secret? Does she even want it to be that? Do I tell her? No. That doesn't seem like a good  idea right now.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I woke up to the sound of the door opening. Spencer came in drying his hair frantically with a towel.

"Oh, hey, Y/N."

"Hi.", I remembered. I remembered everything. And I think he knew I did. What the fuck do I do? Do we talk about it? Do we pretend it didn't happen? I don't think he ever said he loved me back. In fact, I'm pretty sure he didn't believe anything I said.

"Spence, I- -"

"You remember, don't you?"

"Mhm.", I nodded, "I hope you know I meant it. It wasn't just 'transference' or whatever you said."

"Wasn't it?"

Jesus Christ, is he trying to crush my soul?

"Spencer, I know you think that you're just this nerd that everyone makes fun of, but you're not. In fact, quite the opposite. All my friends think that you're cute, you're just shy. And that's ok.", I took a swig of mouth wash and spit it into a cup, "It's one of the many things I love about you."

I think I should tell her. Right? She seems serious. And I think we're already past the point of no return.

"Iloveyoutoo.", he muttered it and said it beyond fast, but I think I got the idea. I still wanted to hear him say it though.

"Hm?"

"I-I-I love you too.", I couldn't help but smile, not to mention his blush was too cute.

I put my hands up but dropped them back down, "I know you have that thing about touch, but can I kiss you?"

"Mhm.", so I wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him closer and placed my lips softly against his. For someone who claimed to have no sexual experience, he was a damn good kisser. And I guess I just happened to be lucky #1.

[tinyboxxtink]

"Doppelganger" *Part 25* !!Finale!!

Okay I know this took two days but remember when I said I was NOT going to make another chapter? Well I had to just fit multiple chapters into this last one. Because dammit it will STOP HERE.

Except for the epilogue.

So here it is, I hope the anticipation and the hype doesn't ruin it for you, I did my best!

Also thank you so much for coming on this ride with me, it's been the longest one yet! I'm going to miss Pinguino and Raffi, but they'll be fine.

Part 24

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---------------------------------

It was finally the night before your wedding day. The day you had been waiting for since you had first kissed Rafael, if you were being totally honest. You were staying at Chloe’s due to the whole traditional “not seeing each other” before the wedding; it was the first night you had spent away from Rafael since the whole “Nevada” debacle. You wanted to prove to him and yourself that you could spend one night without him cuddling you like a toddler afraid to sleep in their own bed. But the more you drank during your “last girl’s night” the more the demons came out for you. Before you knew it you were hiding in your old bathroom dialing Rafael’s number.

“Baby aren’t you--” He started to ask you but you cut him off.

“Do you still want to marry me?”

“Ay dios,” You heard him chuckle. “Si, mi amor,”

“¿Estás seguro?” You asked worriedly.

“Yes carino,” He said very seriously. “I am very very sure,”

“...Okay,” You said in a small voice.

“Now go have fun and tell Chloe not to let you drink anymore, comprende?”

“Si,” You rolled your eyes. As you came out of the bathroom, you were greeted by Maria who was now in your former living room...for some reason.

“Hey babe, so Maria came by for--”

“I came by to ask you a favor, mija,” Maria cut Chloe off.

“Oh um--” You tried to act more sober around the only mother figure you’d really been around since forever. “Yeah sure! What’s up?”

“Well, I know we haven’t known each other that long, but Raffi is basically my son, so I consider you like a daughter,” She smiled sweetly at you, and you were suddenly aware that she was carrying a box with her.

“Oh, well that’s very sweet of you Maria,” You tried your best not to look uncomfortable.

“My husband Felipe and I,” She explained as she opened the box. “We were never able to conceive children ourselves,” She pulled out a very ancient looking, very detailed veil from the box.

“This veil has been worn by many generations in my family, and if I can’t pass it onto my own daughter, it would be my honor to give it to you to wear tomorrow,”

“Oh, Maria,” You did your best to hide your disgust for the veil, looking at her teary eyed smile. You glanced over her head and caught Chloe’s gaze; she was making a face that mimicked how you felt. It was like one of those fruit hats women wore in movies or commercials, only white and frilly. But what could you do?

“I’d be honored to wear it,” You nodded sweetly. Maria threw her arms around you with a tearful cry of joy. Behind her Chloe waved her arms wildly like “what the hell are you doing?!”. You could just shrug like “what else am I supposed to do?!”

“Bless you, hermosa,” She kissed you on the cheek as she stood up to leave. “Now I’ll leave you ladies to your fun,” She smiled and waved as she walked out the door.

“...What the hell?” Chloe couldn’t help but erupt in giggles as she properly examined the monstrosity.

“Shut up,” You tossed a pillow at her. “What was I supposed to do?! She was asking me to carry on her family name, or something,” You looked at the door where she had left; although you were still pretty drunk so you half remembered the conversation.

“Well if Rafael marries you while you wear this, you know it’s true love,” She snickered as she put it on you and turned you towards a mirror above your key ring holder.

“Oh God…” You threw your hands over your face and fell onto the couch face forward.

“Hey hey hey, don’t wrinkle it!” Chloe continued to tease and giggle. “That thing probably came over in some old Cuban woman’s raft,”

“I hate you,” You muttered through the cushions.

“You’ll hate me more if I don’t get you in bed right now,” Chloe shook her head with a laugh and a bottle of water. “But first, drink this. We don’t want you hungover on your big day,”

“Thanks mom,” You took the water and headed to your room, leaving the veil on the couch.

------------------

The next day Chloe woke you up by jumping up and down on your bed yelling “IT’S YOUR WEDDING DAY!!!”

“...Jesus Christ Chloe,” You grumbled. “It’s too early for this,”

“Too early?” She scoffed, plopping right on your butt making you grunt. “Nonsense. It’s your wedding day!!”

“Which begs the question why you’re so happy about it,” You raised a suspicious eyebrow.

“What? I can't be happy for my best friend to get her happy ending?” She feigned offense.

“....Uh huh”, You continued to give her the look.

“And the fact that my bridesmaid’s dress makes me look like a classy pornstar?” She added.

“....An oxymoron, but go on,” You waited for it.

“....And the fact that every eligible lawyer and cop are gonna be at this wedding?!” She finally exclaimed.

“There it is,” You nodded your head with a roll of your eyes as you threw on some clothes to go downstairs.

------

There was a limo waiting outside Chloe’s apartment for you and her. You hesitated getting in, remembering the last time you were in one of them. Chloe decided she’d do a ‘sweep’ for you. She jumped in and slid down the seats, squealing in delight.

“All clear babe! Check out what the husband left you!”

You cautiously slid in the limo to see Chloe pointing to a mini bar/fridge full of sweet pastries and champagne.

“Good lord,” You shook your head with a smile. “Chloe maybe we--” You were starting to say maybe at least wait until 11 am to start drinking, but she had already popped the champagne.

“Here,” She grabbed orange juice from the mini fridge. “Mimosas, the breakfast drink,”

You just stared at the drink she was trying to hand you; orange liquid in a champagne flute. You closed your eyes and told yourself the mind elixir was bright orange like Fanta, not orange juice. You took a deep breath and slowly accepted the mimosa, sipping it. See? You were fine. Everything was fine.

-------------

As you pulled up to St. Michael’s you saw it was swarmed with cameras, reporters, and people in general. It looked like a circus. You saw the crowd and silently wished you had said screw tradition and had Rafael there with you. But you were a big girl, and you had Chloe.

“...Can we get out somewhere less...this?” You nervously asked your driver.

“Absolutely ma’am, I’ll find a private entrance. No problem,”

“Thank you,” You sighed in relief.

-----

After driving around the church a few times, the driver finally found a side street blocked off. He informed the copper he had you in the limo, and the cop waved your limo inside. Chloe jumped out of the limo while holding your hand, nearly breaking your arm.

“Oh! Wait! Hey Jeeves, can we get those pastries and mimosa’s in the lady’s bridal suite?”

“Chloe his name is not--”

“It’s fine, ma’am,” The driver chuckled. “I’ll make sure the refreshments are delivered to your dressing room,”

“You’re a doll,” She blew him a kiss before she continued pulling you through the huge building like she knew exactly where you were going.

“Excuse me, where do we go?” Chloe asked a random man in a suit.

“Oh, it’s you Ms. Y/N!” The man pulled out a camera and began snapping photos.

“Oh my god--- What is WRONG with you people?!” Chloe shoved him aside and took you down another corridor. Finally you reached a doorway that was guarded by two armed guards.

“Hi, do you know--”

“Right this way,” One of them took your hand. “Mr. Barba is already inside getting ready,” He nodded to the door as you walked away. You wanted so badly to swing open the door and jump into his arms, but you knew you had to stay calm.

“Great!” You did your best to smile at him as he led you and Chloe down the hall to another doorway. He opened it to reveal a huge room with a vanity, a changing wall, two long body mirrors and a lush couch. Two sinks lined the wall and a room with a toilet was behind it. Yours and Chloe’s dresses were hanging on the changing wall, and sitting on the vanity were your treats from the limo.

“Weee! Look at all of this!!!” Chloe clapped her hands and giggled wildly as she danced around the lavish room.

“I mean, it is nice--”

“Nice? God I wish I was getting married here!” Chloe sighed as she poured herself another mimosa.

“Well, if you ever find a man I’ll look into it,” You teased her.

“Uh I think you mean WHEN,” She pointed out. “And I think the ‘when’ will be by tonight!”

“My wedding reception isn’t a singles mixer, Chloe,” You rolled your eyes.

“Well of course not,” She shook her head. “It’s a BALL!”

“Oh good god,” You groaned with a small laugh as you poured yourself a mimosa and downed it.

“Whoa there killer, let’s slow it down there,” She gave you a look. “Wouldn’t want you stumbling down the aisle in front of a million people,”

“...Do you think you’re helping?” You asked her in an annoyed tone.

“Sorry, sorry,” She apologized as there was a knock at the door. Chloe answered it to see two women carrying makeup cases and hair tools.

“We’re here to get you ready, Ms. Y/L/N,” One of them smiled at you.

“And her maid of honor, right?” Chloe jumped in.

“Uh...if that’s what the bride wants,” The other one looked at you with a wary stare.

“Yeah that’s fine, actually please do her first by all means,” You waved them over to the long sink wall and vanity.

“You’re a good friend,” Chloe put her hands over your face with tears in her eyes as she smiled.

“...You’re ridiculous,” You patted her head sweetly before she sat in the vanity, ready to be made over.

While Chloe was being turned into a princess, you walked over and admired your dress that looked like it was made for one. It was a long, cream white colored sleeveless dress with intricate cubic zirconia diamonds sewn into the bust. It was the simplest dress Chloe had let you pick. Suddenly you remembered the cornucopia veil, it was sitting on the couch in the box Maria had brought it over in. You pulled it out and put it on; when one of the stylists saw it she gasped.

“Oh, ma’am, I don’t know--”

“My...mother, asked me to wear it,” You stopped her.

“Right,” She nodded uncomfortably while Chloe tried not to laugh at the disgusted faces they were clearly trying to hide.

---------------

After what seemed like hours, you and Chloe were finally done in full make up and up do's. One of the ladies picked up the ancient headwear and tried positioning on your hair as best she could. She took several tries, using hair pins and hairspray before she finally stepped back.

“Lovely,” She smiled as she stepped back to admire her work. You looked in the vanity mirror to see your finished look. The headdress felt like it weighed five pounds, but it was intricately woven into your hair, there was no getting it out now. You longed for the moment Rafael would rip it off your head as soon as you were alone in your honeymoon suite...or, y’know before then.

“Well we’ll see you out there ma’am,” One of them nodded as they gathered their stuff and scooted out the door, leaving you and Chloe alone once again.

“Well,” Chloe examined your head. “At least you won’t lose it…” She was cut off by a knock at the door. You started to open it when you recognized those eyes.

“Rafa!” You slammed the door and yelled through it. “What are you doing? We can’t see each other before the wedding, it’s bad luck,”

“Baby I think we’ve gotten all the bad luck already out of the way,” He called through the door. “And I really, really need to talk to you,”

Your eyes widened in panic as you looked at Chloe, who sprung into best friend mode. “Calm yourself, I’m sure it’s nothing…” She walked over and put her hands on your shoulders.

“Stop freaking her out counselor, are you planning to run? Tell me now so I can get out there and tie you to a chair,”

“What? No! I just-- Y/N please will you open the door, por favor?” He sounded seriously distressed, and he used his secret weapon: speaking in spanish.

You sighed and slowly opened the door, revealing Rafael in a gorgeous black and white tux, and the tallest top hat you’d ever seen.

“Well well well, Mr. Monopoly, don’t you look spiffy?” Chloe snickered, causing you to hit her while Rafael made an even more distressed face.

“I knew it, god it’s awful,” He sighed as he took it off his head and walked inside the room.

“So why are you--?” You started to ask.

“The mayor said it would ‘look better on tv’,” He scoffed in disgust.

“Oh Jesus--” You rolled your eyes. “Baby why didn’t you just tell him--?”

“Because that stupid fucking contract we signed said we would go along with everything he said for the rest of this whole shit show!” He growled at the mess he had gotten himself into. The mayor knew damn well how much more “favors” he would ask of him before he signed that contract, he just knew it.

“Well, if it makes you feel any better…” You pointed to your own head. Rafael’s worried expression turned into a relieved smile as he finally noticed the bird’s nest on your scalp.

“...Maria sprung this on me last night,” You pointed to it. “At least you can take yours off,”

“...Well, that does help a bit,” He half smiled as he examined your ceremonial headdress.

“Is that it mi amor, you’re freaking out over a hat?” You put your hand on his face.

“Well our children are going to see these photos! Videos! Our GRANDKIDS! They’re going to think their grandpa was a huge douche,” He cried overdramatically.

“...Is this what it’s like to be with me? Because I don’t love it,” You teased him.

“I’m serious, Y/N! This isn’t funny!” He gave you a pitiful pout.

“...What else?” You gave him an expectant look.

“What else?”

“All of this over a hat?”

“...Alright fine,” He sighed as he sat down on the lush couch. “I know what I said about all that mattered was me and you standing across from each other but--”

“But?” You gave Chloe a worried look.

“But I also wanted someone else,”

“....Who, Olivia?” You rolled your eyes.

“No!” He exclaimed. “No, my childhood priest, Father Hernandez,”

“Oh,” You said with a relieved sigh. “Well, baby why don’t you just--”

“Because they’re being super particular, stupid Catholics!” He got up and started pacing.

“Apparently THEIR priest Father O’Shannon is ‘assigned’ to this place. God forbid anyone dare replace him,” He grumbled as he continued to pace.

“So you--”

“And it’s just the last straw on top of all of this bullshit, all this bending. I can’t do it!!” He threw up his hands in frustration.

“....Baby, breathe,” You stopped his pacing and pressed your forehead against his, your own personal calming gesture.

“God I guess it is true what they say,” Chloe suddenly spoke up, causing you both to give her a perplexed stare.

“In a couple when one person starts to go off the rails the other one instantly becomes the calm rational one,” She gestured between the two of you.

“Hey, I am NOT--” He protested.

“Baby please,” You shook your head. “I almost forgot how high strung you were until this moment,”

“High strung?” He took offense. “What are you talking about?”

“You forget that I worked for you,” You giggled.

“I’m high strung at work?” He asked. The question caused you to erupt in laughter. “What?! Am I?”

“Oh no sweetie, you’re totally mellow,” You smiled sarcastically.

“How am I--?”

“Think about how much coffee you drink at work, Rafa,”

“I don’t see how that is relevant,” He huffed. He loved his coffee, so what?

“...Mmmkay,” You chuckled, kissing his cheek.

“Well whatever, kettle” He made a pouty face.

“Fair,” You chuckled. “But we’re talking about you right now, pot,”

“Hey, I think I have done more than my share of helping you through your little ‘episodes’, it’s your turn!!!” He crossed his arms like a kid.

“Oh really? ‘Episodes’?” You replied in a snarky tone. Chloe sensed the rising tension and sprung into action.

“Okay! I think that’s enough, Pot. Kettle.” Chloe stepped in between you. “You’re clearly both too high strung for this conversation,”

“He started it,” You stuck your tongue out at Rafael like a five year old.

“Okay now let's not turn on each other, then the terrorist headwear wins,” She pointed to the hat on the vanity and your head.

“....Well do you have a solution, Gandhi?” You raised an eyebrow.

“Actually,” She smiled proudly. “I think I do,” She grabbed her phone and began typing something into google maps.

“You wanna share with the class?” Rafael asked as he gave you a look, like you were supposed to understand her crazy.

“.....Have you seen The Office?” She asked them, then glanced at you with a knowing look. Your face turned into a huge grin as you realized what she was implying.

“Chloe, you’re a genius,” You grabbed her in a hug.

“I know,” She nodded with a cocky smile.

-----

Chloe popped her head out of the door, making sure the coast was clear. When she was sure, she motioned to the two of you out and down the hall towards the back door where you left the limo. You and Rafael got in, and Chloe began to shut the door when you stopped her.

“Aren’t you coming?”

“Someone has to vamp!” She pointed out.

“You're a good friend, Chloe,” You gave her a kiss on her head.

“I know,” She said boastfully. “Just hurry, my bubbly personality can’t hold them off for long,” She slammed the door and you were off.

-----

“...Fucking New York traffic! Estúpido tráfico de mierda,,,” Rafael began muttering under his breath. His childhood church in the Bronx was at least thirty minutes away with the busy Manhattan traffic. You put a hand on his knee to try and soothe him, but he was extra wound up by now. It reminded you of when you were just his assistant; he’d get this way when a trial wasn’t going his way and he felt backed into a corner. The worst days you’d seen him have at the office, where he’d suddenly take off for hours in the middle of the day….

That gave you an idea.

“Baby,” You snapped him out of his internal ranting monologue. He turned to you with a dismayed look.

“I’m sorry, carino,” He apologized, taking your hand that was placed on his knee. “I know I’m--”

“Can priests marry people outside of their church?” You simply asked him.

“....Like a closer church?” He looked at you in confusion.

“.....Actually, I was thinking somewhere closer,” You bit your lip with a smile as you took his phone and typed in an address that linked to the driver’s phone map. He glanced down at it and gave you a huge smile.

“You’re the best,” He gave you a huge kiss as the limo made a U-Turn.

------

Luckily Father Gonzalez used a bike for his transportation, so he was able to make it through traffic pretty easily. He met the two of you outside Central Park pretty soon after you got there.

“I appreciate you doing this for us, Padre,” Rafael hugged the priest tightly. “I didn’t want anyone else marrying us,”

“Claro, Rafael,” He smiled. “Of course! I was hoping St. Michael’s would have a change of heart, pero--”

“You know Catholics,” Rafael rolled his eyes.

“Si,” He nodded. “They’re almost as stubborn as you!” The padre chuckled. Then he noticed you.

“Ay, Rafa,” He gestured at you. “es este su prometido?”

“Si,” You nodded. “Soy su prometida,”

“Ay bien! Ella habla español!” Father Gonzalez smiled brightly. “So are you two ready?”

“Si, Padre,” Rafael nodded. “But first, we need the right backdrop,” He grinned as he took your hand and walked into the park.

----

It was the middle of the day on a Saturday so the park was full of families playing, joggers, street artists and the like. Luckily for you however, nobody seemed to want to see the penguins today. The enclosure was almost empty except for one elderly couple.

“Witnesses!” You beamed at Rafael as you calmly walked up to the two and tapped the woman on the shoulder.

“Excuse me,” You smiled sweetly. “Would you-- my fiancé and I, we’re supposed to get married in this huge chapel down the street from here, but it was just all too much circus so we snuck away so that we could just get married in our favorite spot here and--”

“Baby, too much detail,” Rafael laughed. He loved it when you would ramble on about something when you got excited, but you were on a time crunch.

“...Right,” You blushed. “Anyway is there any way--”

“You’d like us to be witnesses, dear?” The old woman smiled brightly at you.

“Yes, if you wouldn’t mind,” You smiled gratefully.

“Of course not!” The man with her chimed in. “Y’know, back in our day, we had to get married in secret too,”

You suddenly noticed that they were an interracial couple; a white woman and a black man. Your smile faded a bit as you thought of the hardships they must have been through, just to be together, similar to you and Rafael.

“Okay, we’ll do the fast version of this, mijos,” The Padre opened his Bible and began to speak, but looked at the two of you.

“Actually, you know you’re going to do this whole spiel in a little while anyway, why don’t you say your vows in your own words while you can?”

“Oh God,” You muttered, then gasped. “I’m so sorry! I--”

“It’s fine, senorita,” He nodded.

“I just...I’m not great, with the speeches and the speaking in public thing,” You twirled the one piece of hair hanging from your updo in your hand nervously.

“I mean, we’re not exactly in public, amor,” Rafael smirked.

“You know what I mean!” You hit him playfully. “I just...I want it to be perfect,”

“If you speak from your heart dear, it will be perfect,” The old woman assured you. “Just look into his eyes and say whatever it is you’re thinking,”

“....Well, maybe not ‘everything’,” The old man added with a laugh, giving you two a raunchy look. Good lord.

“Okay,” You took a deep breath and took Rafael’s hands, looking into his gorgeous green eyes.

“I...um….” You looked down nervously.

“Hey,” Rafael cupped your chin to look at him. “It’s okay, mi amor. It’s just me, it’s just us. Just like I said,”

“Just us,” You smiled, then began to start again.

“Rafael,” You took a deep breath. “It’s...it’s hard for me to make some big speech because the truth is, when I look into your eyes I forget everything. Every wrong decision, every hurdle we’ve been through, it all just...fades away, when you look at me,” You squeezed his hands tighter.

“You have done so much for me in so little time. People probably think that we’re insane because we’re committing our lives to each other after only really knowing each other for a few months, but the truth is it feels like a lifetime. I feel like I was born loving you, I just didn’t know it until I saw you,” His eyes were starting to water as your voice cracked with your own tears.

“I know that I have put you through so much grief, so much pain and...doubt,” You paused, wiping a few stray tears. “But you have never, not once, abandoned me. You’ve stuck through all of my crazy, all of our shenanigans--”

You glanced over at the old couple who were grinning ear to ear. You didn’t want to get into all the psycho drama you and Rafael had been through in front of total strangers, but he gave you a knowing look when you said ‘shenanigans’. He knew what you meant; because of course he did. You were connected.

“I’m actually really glad that you had your ‘freak out’ because for one it made me look like the sane one for once,” All of you chuckled. “But also, because it got us our chance to get married our way, in our spot,” You gestured to the cave around you.

“I remember the very first time you brought me here, I thought that it was done. We were done. I thought that our one perfect day was going to be just that-- one perfect day,” You began to choke on your words again as you thought back to that very first day, the day you “magicked” him.

“I never in my wildest dreams thought that--'' You glanced at the Padre and the couple again. “That we’d….start, again here,” You exchanged another knowing look.

“And I certainly never thought you’d propose to me in this place-- with a flash mob, no less!” The Padre and couple laughed in surprise, Rafael began to blush profusely, but you put a hand to his red cheek.

“Literally every single beginning we’ve had-- it started right here,” You wiped more stray tears, already knowing the woman back at the church was going to have to re-do all of it.

“And now it’s starting again-- for the rest of our lives,” You sniffled while Rafael wiped more tears from your face and then his own.

“...Okay I’m done,” You took a deep breath in and out as you smiled at Father Hernandez.

“Alright well then Rafa--”

“Oh wait!!!” You suddenly interjected. “Also, I love you,” You make an “eek” face. “I can’t believe I left that out,”

“...I’m pretty sure that whole speech was an ‘I love you,’ dearie,” The old woman patted your back with a reassuring smile.

“I agree,” Rafael nodded. “And to be honest-- I don’t think I can follow that,”

“Oh come on,” You rolled your eyes. “It wasn’t that great,”

“No it wasn’t great,” He shook his head. “It was perfecto,” He took both of your hands in his once more. “...All I can say is, ditto,”

“Ditto?” You laughed. “Real romantic, Rafa,”

“Well I can’t think of anything more than what you’ve already said!” Rafael shrugged with a laugh.

“Well, except this: You say that I’ve put up with you, and never abandoned you, but neither did you,” He pulled you closer towards him.

“You’ve put up with me plenty, and you could have walked away plenty of times. But you stayed with me. You fought for me. And I will spend the rest of our lives trying to be good enough for you, not the other way around,”

“You’re already good enough for me, Rafael,” You bit your lip as you tried your hardest not to kiss him before Padre said you could.

“Can I kiss her yet Padre?” Rafael read your mind.

“Calma, Rafa,” Padre chuckled. “Do you have rings?”

“Shit, the rings!” Rafael groaned. “Sorry, Padre,” He quickly apologized.

“Wait...baby,” You turned around and looked down at all the decorative stones that lined the bottom of the tank. You picked two up and handed one to Rafael.

“Pebbles,” He smiled at you. “Like penguins,”

“Ah, well then…” The Padre shrugged, having no idea what was happening but went along with it anyway. “I guess, exchange the pebbles now?”

You giggled as you placed your pebble in Rafael’s hand, then he placed his in yours.

“Well then, I guess by the power vested in me by God and the state of New York, I now pronounce you man and wife,” He shrugged with a smile. “Now you may kiss her, Rafa,”

“Gracias, Padre,” He grinned before pulling you into a passionate kiss, a kiss rivaling many of the kisses you had exchanged in this cave before now.

“Now, if you three would like to attend a circus, we’d be glad to have you,” You glanced at your three witnesses.

They looked at each other with confused glances, then shrugged and followed you and Rafael back towards the limo.

---------------

As soon as you pulled back behind the church, the Padre and the couple were shown to seats by one of the security guards while you and Rafael walked back to the bridal suite. Chloe ran up to the both of you before you could make it here, Rafael’s top hat in her hand.

“What the hell, you guys?!” She hissed, then realized you were in a church so she made a sign of the cross and kissed her fist.

“They’re about to start rioting!” She added.

“Sorry, sorry, Chloe,” You kissed her cheek. “You’re a good friend,”

"I want you to realize you've said that three times now,” She smiled proudly. “Be sure to tell all of your sexy eligible lawyer friends that, Rafael,”

“I’ll be sure to slip it in every conversation later, Chloe,” He smirked as he gave her a kiss on the cheek as well.

“Alright now take this magic hat and get down that aisle before the mayor actually kills you,” She shoved the top hat in Rafael’s hands and shooed him through the hall and towards the doors of the sanctuary.

“Alright,” She focused on you. “You ready to do this?”

“I mean…” You gestured to your messed up make up and the veil falling out of your hair.

“Aw crap,” Chloe grimaced. “Ok, well looks like you’re getting the Chloe special,” She went and grabbed her purse from the bridal room and pulled you into the ladies room.

After a few minutes you reemerged with perfect make up and the veil reattached to your hair like a nest. Hey, you just had your perfect ceremony. You could last a few more minutes with this thing.

“Alright, now you’re ready,” She brushed you off and opened the sanctuary doors to signal the piano to start playing the Bridal Suite.

The doors opened and Chloe took your hand as you both walked down the aisle together. The flashing lights and bright red dots from film cameras were starting to overwhelm you as you walked, but you focused on Rafael.

He was at the end of all this erratic tunnel of people gawking at you like a zoo animal. You just breathed in and out and kept your gaze locked into his; his smile was like a bright beacon in the darkness. Finally you reached the altar and he took your hands in his. You felt safe again; you’d always feel safe in his grasp.

“Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today…” The priest began to speak, but the only thing the two of you heard were each other, speaking volumes to each other with just your looks. It was just like Rafael had promised: Just you and him.

And it would just be you and him, forever.

#rafael barba #Rafael barba imagine #rafael barba x you #rafael barba x reader #law and order svu #law and order svu fanfiction #rafael barba imagine #doppelganger

[louiseleblancdiggory]

"I could never leave you behind." + "I know you're scared" + Rowan + Aelin = Angst Fest = Happy(?) Reader

You guys get happy with sad shit I will never understand this. I usually listen to songs while writing angst so I will attach it here. Anyways, here you go..... Enjoy I guess?

Warnings: death, blood, mentions of war, illness

La Vie en Rose

- -

Aelin was exhausted.

Her golden bangs were sticking to her forehead, and it didn’t matter how many times she swiped them away with the back of her hand, they always seemed to go back. She should have listened to Lysandra and not have cut them. If she hadn’t, then maybe she would have been able to tuck them into the white cloth headband holding the rest of her hair back. It was made out of the same linen as her dress and apron, but it was probably the cleanest garment she wore these days.

Before, Aelin was never seen with a speck of dirt on her, always wearing beautiful and fancy dresses. Her fashion style was commented among the elite of Terrasen, and she prided herself in her own beauty.

Beauty didn’t matter these days, she supposed. Neither did beautiful clothes, or how clean you were. No, those things seemed so far away now that Aelin felt rather like a foolish little girl when she remembered them. When this all started, the government, the people on the streets kept saying how this would change their men forever, but no one seemed to warn the women how it would affect them too.

Aelin was sitting on the floor, an old metal water bottle in front of her. She had drank until the last drop after treating one of the soldiers, the work harder than usual. It had required so many stitches, that Aelin didn’t know how she had managed to do it all without her hands trembling terribly. Usually, Elide or Lysandra did the stitches— Aelin had always been better in the calming part, in keeping the soldiers company until they got better.

Or until they passed.

But Lysandra had been transferred to a camp on the other side of Terrasen, and Elide had fallen ill five months after arriving at the camps. She had been her cousin, had been someone Aelin knew her whole life, so after she didn’t recover from the illness, Aelin became much more numb to the job. This wasn’t like the movies she had seen. No dramatic scenes, no happy ending in sight. Only death, and pain, and blood. Sometimes, Aelin looked around and wondered if Elide’s death hadn’t been a blessing to the sweet girl.

Perhaps this was Gods’ way of taking the good souls with them until they abandoned this world once and for all.

Most nights for the past years, Aelin would pray for death too.

She never died, though. She woke up everyday and made sure these men didn’t die either. She made sure that they would wake up with her in the next morning, in blinding pain but glad that they had another chance, another speck of hope of ever going back home. That is, if there was a home to go back after everything.

Despite all the death and destruction around her, Aelin had also grown rather fond of some soldiers. It was foolish, she knew, to get attached to people who walked into battlefields everyday. It was foolish to sit on the cobblestones of the little infirmary whenever no one needed her, watching the horizon and hoping they would come back. Despite its foolishness, though, Aelin supposed everyone needed some hope these days.

Hers was Rowan Whitethorn.

Rowan Whitethorn had been her hope since Elide had died and Lysandra had been taken away.

He was one of the Lieutenants around, and despite his seriousness and brooding nature, he had always been kind to Aelin. Always visited her after finishing reports, always came to drink with her after a good day.

Always came by the bad days too.

He always made sure to check in with her after coming back, just so he would let her know he was still alive. He was still there.

His friends became her friends, and now whenever Aelin looked over the horizon, she wouldn’t wait only for Rowan. Her heart also hurt whenever she thought about the Moonbeam twins, Vaughan, Gavriel or Lorcan not coming back. Always felt unbelievably afraid she would go back home alone one day.

No, getting attached was foolish but hope was needed indeed.

Aelin hoped for so many things, but also always kept all that bottled numbness around just in case.

Hope was all they had these days.

Fenrys hoped he would go back to Doranelle one day, he would always say. He had met a beautiful woman weeks short of being drafted, and although years had passed, he still hoped she had waited. Still hoped he could have a normal life after this. 

Years later after the war was over, he would discover that the city of Doranelle had been attacked and the beautiful woman hadn’t made it out.

Vaughan and Connall hoped they both would survive so, once they went back home, they could get properly married. Connall would always announce to the lower ranking soldiers that they were all invited to the ceremony, a party so big it would be more memorable than this war. Vaughan would smile at him, but fear and sadness always clouded his eyes. Hope was never enough to erase fear, it seemed.

Years later after the war was over, Connall would sit alone in an empty house, mourning for a man he never had the chance to marry properly.

Lorcan had loved Elide. Although only together for five months, Aelin knew Lor had loved her cousin. After her death, Aelin believed he wished for death, wished to join Elide in a place better than this. She discovered months later that Lorcan still had hope, still had dreams. As strange as it was to imagine that man with kids, Lorcan hoped he survived enough to do what Elide had always dreamed of. A small orphanage that would treat kids right until a loving family came by— a thing Lorcan hadn’t had when younger.

Years later after the war was over, Lorcan would decide to remain in the army, too scarred from years fighting to ever go back to the normal world.

Gavriel hoped to be alive so he could see Andromeda again. His lover, he would sometimes quietly tell Aelin while she stitched him up. Beautiful like no one, a terrible dancer who loved to dance with her whole heart. Gavriel hoped he could see her dance one more time.

Years later after the war was over, Gavriel would go back home to a grave with a woman inside that he would never see dancing again. Same illness as Elide, he would discover. He never talked to Lorcan after that, as if the other man was a mirror he refused to look at.

And then there was Rowan. In the beginning, he would tell her he didn’t have anything or anyone waiting for him. That dying in this war wouldn’t be terrible, wouldn’t crush his hopes because he didn’t have any.

That had been years ago, because two weeks ago, during a summer night while they all sat around the fire, Rowan told that his mind had changed. That he had something to hope for.

“Once this war is over, Aelin Galathynius, I hope I can take you out.” He said with a small smile, whispering so no one else would hear his dreams. “Any flashy or expensive or fancy place you want to go. And then I will take you to a bar and we will dance all night , just like Gavriel says his wife likes to do. And then, only then, I will kiss you.”

Aelin had smiled, arching an eyebrow at him. “Only then?”

He nodded solemnly. “Only then.”

The thought of it always brought a smile to Aelin’s lips, a new sort of lightheartedness taking over her body. Even amidst the war, imagining a life with Rowan— a normal life— always made her see the world a soft and lovely pink.

“Galathynius.” Rolfe calls from the infirmary. “They need you at the shock ward. Sorry, sweetheart, I tried to get them to give you some rest.”

“It’s fine, Rolfe.” Aelin said, getting up. “We are all used to it by now.”

Aelin had worked all day, seeing the sun slowly set, painting the world pink and orange. It was about time for dinner, and she was just finishing talking to a boy no older than seventeen who had broken his arm when rushed steps sounded. Hell broke lose in the room as a group of men hauled another one in one of the tables, shouting things to one another and to anyone around them.

It took Aelin a whole minute to realize who was on top of the table.

She didn’t know if she should cry or laugh bitterly. Maybe the Gods hated her, maybe the Gods did hate them all.

Aelin walked calmly to the table, willing all that bottled numbness to take over the hope in her body.

“How am I doing, ma’am? I tried telling them I was ok, but apparently they wanted a nurse’s opinion.” Rowan asked, his face in a grimace. Aelin knew that Rowan knew enough about injuries to know the answer to that. She looked back at the boys, all suddenly quiet as they watched Rowan.

Aelin decided to ignore his question, smiling at him instead. “Came back to check in? It was getting late, I was worried.”

Rowan didn’t complain about her changing the subject, instead grabbing her hand. “I could never leave you behind, Fireheart.”

Her throat twisting but not a single tear appearing. “Good, you still owe me a flashy, expensive, and fancy dinner.”

“Some dancing too, if I remember correctly.”

She nodded, cupping his face in one hand and rubbing his cheek with her thumb. “And a kiss.”

He nodded too, the tears that were missing on Aelin coming out of his eyes. “I know you are scared—“

Aelin bent down to kiss him on the forehead. “You are doing just fine, sir.”

Rowan smiled at that, lovingly and through tears. “I was just confirming.”

Ten minutes.

It had taken ten minutes until he died, nothing anyone could do.

Aelin left the room without a word to anyone. She walked and walked and walked until she knew no one would find her.

And only then she cried.

Because despite having just lost another person, she was a nurse. And nurses never cried in front of their patients or patients’ families. Never in front of the soldiers.

But now she was alone. Truly and wholly alone.

And so Aelin cried.

And the pink world became gray again.

Tags:

@in-love-with-caramel-macchiato @jlinez @courtofjurdan @aelinfeyreeleven945tbln @ladywitchling @lexflame @sleeping-and-books @annejulianneh111 @perseusannabeth @linshryver @mu-si-ca-l @camilamartinezdunne @dank-queen7 @minaidss @starborn-faerie-queen @booksofthemoon @loveofbooksandwine @jesstargaryenqueen @bluejaberry @multifandommess-blog @yesdreamblog @abookishfreak @faerie-queen-fireheart @maastrash @morganofthewildfire @queen-of-glass @heirofthenightcourt

#rowaelin #rowaelin fanfiction #rowaelin fanfic #rowaelin au #rowaelin angst #angst #angsty #rowan whitethorn #aelin ashryver galathynius #aelin galathynius #fenrys moonbeam #connall moonbeam #vaughan #lorcan salvaterre #gavriel #lysandra ennar #elide lochan #rolfe #throne of glass #throne of glass fanfiction #throne of glass fanfic #throne of glass oneshot #throne of glass au #rowaelin oneshot #writing #mardu writes #answered

[coping-via-clint-eastwood]

Everything Hurts - AOS!Leonard McCoy x Reader

(A/N: @urban-trek-thru-middle-earth Here, I wrote this thing. I hope it helps.

This happened to me this morning.)

You lay on your side staring miserably at the wall. You had detached yourself from Leo's embrace, because your entire body hurt, and his arms around you made it worse.  You hurt too much to move and check the time, but when you first woke up, it felt like the equivalent of 3 am.  You spent what was probably an hour to two hours shifting in little bits, trying to get comfortable and fall back asleep.  After that time, you gave up.  Your entire body felt numb.  That was when the overthinking started.  'Why can't I sleep?  Why can't I sleep?' repeated in your mind. Tears formed and fell from your eyes. You rubbed them away with your arm.  You lay there, in physical numbness and emotional pain, until you heard and felt Lenny stirring behind you.  "Mmh...(y/n)..."  he murmured, his arm coming down around your waist quite heavily.

"Ow!"  you gasped, flinching away from him, and gasped out another, "Ow!"  because even that movement had caused you pain.

That woke Leo up fully.  He sat up in bed and tentatively put his hand on your shoulder.  "What happened?"  he whispered; from past experience, you (and other patients, for that matter) preferred it when he spoke softer when you were in physical pain, because that usually meant that you had a headache as well.

"I've been awake since three..." you said hoarsely.  Your throat hurt as well, but that was because you had not drunk any water since you had first awoken.

His eyebrows furrowed.  "Again?  You were doing so well..."  When Leo first found out you had sleeping problems, he had tried setting a strict lifestyle for you, appertaining to what time you ate dinner; what time you went to bed, etcetera.  When even that did not work, he prescribed you sleeping pills.  You were able to sleep then.  You used them for a while.  However, Leo had recently tried to get you off them, so that you were not dependent on them.  You had been sleeping well on your own for the past three weeks.  So this was a relapse.

"I'm sorry, Leo..." you tried to say in a normal voice, to hide your crying.  You felt that you had failed him somehow, because you had broken progress.

He knew you well, and reached over your head to the nightstand.  He yanked a piece of tissue from its box and put it over your eyes.  You quietly took it from him and wiped your tears.  "You know I don't blame you for anything," he rumbled softly, moving your hair out of your face.  Bless him for his gentle doctor's hands, because any harder contact would have made your headache worse.  You were unable to come up with a response.  "You have to get up.  You'll feel better after some breakfast," he told you.

"It hurts to move..." you whined a little.  He sighed, pitying you. Then, you felt his hands on your shoulder, gently massaging it.  You tensed up and hissed in pain at first.  "Relax," his smooth voice rumbled, sending pleasant shivers down your spine, "It's worse when you're tense."  You did as the doctor ordered, and slowly begun to feel better under his careful pressing and rubbing.  "You know what to do, right?"  he asked.  When it came to aches due to lack of sleep, you had to inform him when you felt better, because unlike aches due to injury to the muscle, the receding of pain in sleeping muscles was not tangible.

"Mhm..." you sighed, your eyes closed and a relaxed smile on your face.

He raised an eyebrow at your sudden change in mood, and of course you felt his hands slipping away from your shoulder to massage slightly lower down your arm, much to your disappointment.  "It seems to me that that bit there is already better," he said as he did so.

You genuinely whined and begged him, "Just a little more..." He moved his hands back up with no arguments. He understood that when you said you were in pain, you actually were in pain. "Thank you..." you whispered sheepishly when he complied.

"No problem," he responded in tandem. The both of you fell silent again. The whole process of massaging your arm only had the occasional informing that he could move his hands elsewhere. "Okay," he said when he was done with your wrist, "Turn onto your back." You did so with much grunting and groaning. He sighed sympathetically as he knelt between your legs and leant over you, supporting himself with a hand on either side of your head. He grinned at you before saying softly, "Good morning, sweetheart." He lowered his head and kissed you, his eyes closed.  You lifted your good arm and placed your hand on the back of his head, trying to make as much contact with him as possible without hurting either of you.  Normally, you would have liked it if he had put his full weight on you, because you would feel secure and warm, but just...not just then. He pulled away and leant his forehead on yours for a few moments. Then, he shifted further back on the bed, and now leant on his elbows, which were on either side of your abdomen. He slid his hands under your back and started massaging it. You groaned in relief, subconsciously moving so that his hands massaged the area around your spine. He understood and worked on it, paying attention to your vocalisations, movements, and occasionally looking up to see your look of either relief or pain. You moved only the lower part of your torso at first, not daring to aggravate your upper back. But as soon as Len started to eradicate the pain there, you started twisting your back and popping your spine. "Can you not do that while I'm massaging you?" he said uncomfortably with a frown.

"Sorry," you smiled, staying still like he asked. He soon eased the muscles of your upper back and your other shoulder. He shifted to lie on your other side, and your other arm was gotten over with quickly too. "Ahhhh..." you sighed, rolling your shoulders.

"Not yet," he smiled. He moved his hands to your neck.

"Mmh..." you sighed and closed your eyes again. He chuckled, glad that you were feeling better. After that, he massaged your head. That had the most pain relief. You yawned; you had been yearning for sleep all night, and you were suddenly comfortable enough to sleep again."

"Eat breakfast before going back to sleep, he lectured. Then he asked, "Do your legs need massaging too?"

You flexed them. You did not exclaim in pain, but still responded, "Yeah. They aren't hurting at all, but they're the numbest of the lot."

"Okay then," he said. He shifted to lie next to your legs.

"Area under my knees is the weakest," you told him.

After finally having given treatment to your entire torso and all your limbs, he put his arm under your waist, about to lift you up. "Can you get up now?" You sat up with his help. You slid your legs off the bed until your feet touched the floor. You could walk on your own, but your knees were still wobbly, and you kept stumbling. You could step and put your weight on your other leg if you had to, but with there was a wall or a piece of furniture beside you, you would lean on it. He let you fall onto him and helped walk you to the bathroom. After the both of you did your ablutions, he walked you out to the dining table. He pulled out a chair for you and pretty much dropped you onto it. He got what the two of you would be eating from the replicators and set the plates down, going back for the drinks. You drank some water before consuming anything else. "This is just a minor relapse. You'll be able to sleep alright tonight," he said over a forkful of egg.

"I hope so," you sighed sadly, your shoulders slumping.

“Hey.” He reached a hand across and held yours. “This is only temporary. You will recover.” You smiled wryly. “Try to sleep after we eat.” When the two of you finished, Leonard washed the utensils. After that was done, he grabbed his communicator. “McCoy to Mr. Scott.”

“Ah, the good doctor! What can I do for the boyfriend of the woman who’s supposed to be at my warp core in a few minutes?”

“Yeah well she won’t be there today.”

“Oh...did she not sleep again?”

“Y-ep.”

“All right. Understood. (Y/n), are you there?”

“Yes sir.”

“Have a good rest.”

“Thank you sir.”

“This is Mr. Scott, over and out.”

“Thank you Leo,” you smiled.

He stood up and made his way over to you. He helped you up and led you to the bed. He sat you down. He stared into your eyes for a few seconds. Then, his hand slowly made their way under your shirt, moving up your sides and then back down, sliding to your back and up it. You sighed and shuddered at the touch of his warm, calloused hands. He lifted your shirt off your head, then took his shirt off and put it on you. You sighed and cuddled him, resting your head on his shoulder. He held you, placing a kiss on your cheek. He stayed like that for as long as he could. Very reluctantly, he pushed you back to lie flat down. “I gotta go now,” he said sadly.

“I know...” you hummed, putting a hand on his cheek. He pulled himself away and got into his uniform, then immediately walked out before he was any more compelled than he already was to stay. You sighed and moved to his side of the bed. You embraced his pillow, burying your nose in it and inhaling his scent. After a while, you were indeed able to fall asleep. You woke up to the pang of hunger in your gut. After a quick lunch, you sat in bed and let your food digest. You sighed and laid your arm across your eyes. Maybe you could fall asleep sitting up...

You woke up to a hand gently shaking your shoulder. “Sweetheart, sweetheart wake up,” Leonard said as he shook you.

You grumbled sleepily. Your arm had fallen awkwardly, and now your shoulder was stiff. “Ow...” you mumbled, looking down at it. He put one hand on it and enclosed the muscles in his fingers. This time, he could feel exactly what he had to do. You were better in no time. You swung your arm.

“Have you even eaten dinner?” your doctor asked you. You shook you head. He brought you up to a chair again and sat you down. “Eat, then you continue sleeping,” he instructed as he went to the replicators again. You complied wordlessly. He sent you off to brush your teeth while he washed the utensils. You collapsed onto your front on the bed. It was his turn in the bathroom. When he was done, he joined you. He turned you over and brought you into his embrace, with him on his back and you face down on top of him. “Been sleeping well, huh?” he murmured. You nodded. “You can sleep again?” More nodding. He smiled. He stroked your back, and as he did so, he sung softly to you. You buried your face further into his chest as you became more relaxed. He smiled when he sensed you fall asleep and fastened his arms around your waist once more. He son fell asleep himself.

#c-v-c-e fic #karl urban #leonard mccoy #star trek aos #star trek

[pengiesama]

Hello, Nurse! (Fic, TGCF, HC/XL)

Title: Hello, Nurse! Series: Heavenly Official’s Blessing (Tian Guan Ci Fu) Pairing: Hua Cheng/Xie Lian

Summary:

While Xie Lian can’t ever manage to come back from a mission in one piece, he’s at least got a sexy nurse waiting for him at home.

(As well as the best (and rudest) medical expertise that money can buy.)

Link: AO3

Read on Tumblr!

The troupe of demon bandits that Xie Lian had been asked to subdue certainly weren’t a challenge in themselves, but, well, an unlucky god was an unlucky god.

The black powder traps that the demons had set up around their camp presented Xie Lian with quite a predicament. Of course, he’d spotted and smelled them from a mile away, and moreover said traps were the oldest trick in the book. The real issue was that they were baited with human captives: any attempt to remove the captive would set off the trap, and set off a chain reaction along the line. Truthfully, it was a more clever setup than Xie Lian would have expected from a run-of-the-mill gaggle of demon bandits; if they’d only set their minds to less murderous goals, they would’ve had a much brighter future ahead of them.

(Or at least brighter than what their life path was currently leading to, which was Xie Lian’s fist shattering their skulls.)

Thus, Xie Lian was slightly delayed in what would have otherwise been a very simple pest-control operation. By the time Xie Lian had freed the last human captive and sent them running down the road to the safety of town with a protective talisman stuck to their backs, the bandits had roused themselves from their drunken sleep and rallied to attack.

Xie Lian was already finely dusted with black powder from his previous efforts; even though he dodged the barrage of flaming arrows, the heat caught the powder and set it off. The force from the powder’s ignition sent Xie Lian careening back into the bandits’ stash of booze, which only exacerbated Xie Lian’s then-current predicament. That is to say, he was set alight like a firework.

Now, this was hardly Xie Lian’s first rodeo when it came to being burned alive. Thus, despite feeling a bit embarrassed for tripping in public, and feeling more than a little agony, he was able to dispatch the demons with the blazing fury of a comet. Xie Lian was then presented with the peace and quiet needed to think and hatch a plan to put out the flames before they caused enough damage to put him out of commission for more than a few weeks.

This was where things got very silly. You see, the flames at that point had degraded Xie Lian’s vision, and thus while he was carefully searching about (not running! Xie Lian knew the rules of fire safety) for the sounds of a nearby river or body of water, he misjudged his steps and found himself tumbling ass-over-teakettle down a steep incline. Luckily, the sudden stop, drop, and rolling motion calmed the flames some, and the incline even ended with him being dumped into a river.

But, well, the river led into raging rapids, and then that’s when the landslide kicked off…

 --

 Xie Lian’s conscious swam back to him, slowly.

It was old hat, by now, getting injured and knocked out cold; as old hat as his old hat. It was so old hat, in fact, that he had already started the process of taking a mental inventory of his various injuries.

 Broken leg? Yes, times two. Felt like…probably broken in two places in the one, and five places in the other.

Broken arm? Surprisingly, only one, it seemed.

Neck and back? Well, they were still present and attached to his person. This was about the only good thing he could say about their status.

Burns? Very yes.

His sight had yet to return, but his hearing had remained intact through the incident, despite being briefly blown out by the impromptu fireworks show. This, at least, was a blessing, as it allowed him to hear the soft, soothing voice of his San Lang as he spoke to him.

“…your highness. Are you awake? I’ve called the doctor. You’re in bed and I’m holding your hand.”

Xie Lian took his word for the latter part, as he couldn’t feel much through the pain of the burns. His throat was so dry. He wished he’d managed to drink some of the river water while getting thrashed about.

“…wa…w…” Xie Lian tried to croak out a request through his battered throat.

Almost immediately, without having to finish struggling the words out, he felt cool, blessedly cool water trickling down his throat. It soothed as it went; clearly having been charged with healing energy. Xie Lian felt a twinge of guilt even as he greedily continued to drink. The only reason he was in as relatively good a state as he was, was no doubt due to Hua Cheng’s efforts. Healing injuries of this magnitude with spiritual energy alone was no small feat. He knew that his San Lang would allow him to suck him dry. Panic began to flood Xie Lian as the memories surfaced; the memories of Hua Cheng doing just that.

Hua Cheng drew back, seeming to sense Xie Lian’s distress. Xie Lian’s throat and mouth were healed enough, now, for him to feel that Hua Cheng had been feeding him the water through a kiss.

“Does…does San Lang…always treat his patients so sweetly…?” Xie Lian managed to rasp out.

After a pause, Xie Lian heard him chuckle. Then, he vaguely felt himself being arranged more comfortably on the bed.

“No,” Hua Cheng said. “Not in the least, when it’s not His Highness in my care.”

Xie Lian made a thoughtful noise, as Hua Cheng very carefully move his splinted legs. “Of course…of course. That quilt; was it yours?”

Hua Cheng paused in his movements. The memories were hazy, for Xie Lian, and the words painful to say through his throat and the squeezing of his heart.

“Back then…at the, the quarantine settlement…for those affected…that helpful little nurse with the bandaged face…when I’d fallen asleep on the outskirts, sprawled out on the grass in full martial regalia…I woke to find some kind-hearted person had tucked me in, with their own quilt. What a sight I must’ve been. So silly-looking.”

Xie Lian could feel Hua Cheng holding his hand, now. His injuries were healing quickly under the care of such an attentive nurse.

“His Highness looked beautiful, as beautiful as he always did and always does,” Hua Cheng replied quietly. “Beautiful enough to make flowers bloom beneath him to serve as his bed.”

Xie Lian thought back, a bit confused. “Did that happen? I wonder why. Maybe I’d gotten some seeds stuck in my pockets from running around…”

Hua Cheng laughed in earnest at that. Xie Lian was almost, almost healed enough to be able to pout at being teased.

He heard the door to the room open, and heard Yin Yu attempt to get out an announcement before he was overtaken.

“Lord Chengzhu, Your Highness, please forgive the intrusion; this one wishes to announce the arrival of—”

“They know who I am,” the doctor cut him off. Xie Lian heard her approach the bed with speedy, single-minded purpose, and a heavy bag of tools and tinctures. “What now, eh? Smells like you got into a fight with a drunken fire dragon…”

 --

 Despite her sharp tongue, Lord Chengzhu trusted this particular ghost doctor with all of Xie Lian’s (frequent) medical emergencies. This trust was well-warranted – after the process of examination, treatment, and prescription of various follow-up medications, salves, and a list of dos-and-don’ts for physical activity, Xie Lian was already feeling fresher and revitalized.

“…and when I say no doing that until he’s finished convalescing, I mean no doing that, eh?”

…though perhaps sometimes Xie Lian found some of her instructions a bit hard to swallow. How was he supposed to not want to do that when he had such an irresistible nurse tending to him? The medical arts were inscrutable and cruel.

“Of course, yisheng,” Hua Cheng assured. “Please allow my assistant to show you to the reception hall, where yisheng may select a treasure from my collection that is to her liking, in addition to her standard fee…”

“None of those nonsense trinkets. Send over more research material and try to instill within your husband an ounce of self-preservation. It doesn’t come naturally to certain folk.”

Hua Cheng held his tongue, and Xie Lian heard the doctor’s footsteps leave the room. The bed dipped beside him, and Xie Lian felt Hua Cheng carefully, cautiously, curl the long length of his body against his side.

“Gege’s wounds are still tender,” Hua Cheng murmured. “Please let this one know if he’s upsetting them.”

Xie Lian managed to shake his head, which was an accomplishment. “San Lang’s nearness keeps me well.”

“Then I will remain forevermore,” Hua Cheng stated. “Blessed for the opportunity to fret over and pamper His Highness while he is helpless to insist otherwise.”

“San Lang—”

“Doctor’s orders.”

Xie Lian let his head fall back and groaned.

Truly, the road to wellness would be long and filled with more such teasing. Heavens help him.

#天官赐福 #tgcf #heavenly official's blessing #tian guan ci fu #hualian #a tenderly crafted fanfiction

[patchwork-panda]

If A Moment Is All We Are (18/?)

AO3 link: HERE

6:50 am

I snapped my phone shut and continued to wait.

Ten minutes early. Good.

I wasn’t working with Kunikida but he would definitely approve of my coming early if he were here. I’d tried calling Dazai as soon as I arrived but, predictably, he hadn’t picked up. He was probably still on his way or decided the water looked really nice this morning and jumped into the river (Atsushi had warned me via text last night that Dazai had done at least this three times already), in which case, I’d have to go find him. But I could worry about that later. Since I was here a little early...

Scanning my surroundings, I grinned and switched my phone to camera mode.

Surprisingly, this was the first time one of my jobs had taken me to Minato Mirai, the most famous district in Yokohama; so far, the closest I’d been to this place since joining the Agency was when Yosano had dragged me to Motomachi shopping district for my makeover���which was still several stops away. I shifted my bag over my shoulder and started snapping photos, not caring that I looked like an excitable tourist.

I hadn’t been to Minato Mirai in years and it was such a beautiful day. The skies overhead were a beautiful pastel-blue, with not a cloud to be seen and faint hints of purple and orange visible on the distant horizon. The ocean, or what I could see of it from here, anyway, was a deep sparkling sapphire blue. Even the tops of the gray and white buildings were still dyed in subtle shades of pink and gold from the remnants of dawn, like an image from a painting.

I should’ve woken up even earlier; then I could’ve run down to the pier for even more photos. If I got some good shots, maybe I could use them as reference images—or background images for my laptop or phone. Maybe I could even send a few to Kunikida! I’m sure he would appreciate some beautiful images of a beautiful morning!

Warmth bloomed in my chest at the thought of surprising Kunikida with a nice good morning text, complete with a freshly shot photo nice enough to put on a postcard.

I sighed.

He worked really hard, Kunikida... I forgot who, but someone at the Agency had told me he spent his mornings meditating. He was always so focused, so dedicated... I hoped he was able to take some time to relax here and there. I checked the time again.

6:55 am.

Still early. He was probably still meditating right now (and I didn’t want to interrupt) so I set a reminder for myself to send him the text around eight, when he got into the office. A nice greeting so he could get a great start to a hopefully great day.

I smiled and kept shooting.

As my camera slowly focused on a distant landmark, the familiar shape of an enormous Ferris Wheel appeared on my screen: one of Yokohama’s most iconic attractions, Cosmo Clock 21. I paused to stare at it. I’d gone for a ride on the Cosmo Clock once with some classmates, back when I’d first moved to Yokohama. Although we’d had a pretty good time, I’d always wanted to go back, preferably on a date, and not just any date... a date with someone special, at night, when we could rise above the lights of the city and find ourselves sitting amongst the stars...

If only that someone special could be Kunikida Doppo...

“Ku-su-no-ki-kuuuuun!!”

I sighed as the image of the Ferris wheel was blocked from view by a pair of twinkling brown eyes.

Dazai.

“Whatcha lookin’ at?”

“Good morning, Dazai-san,” I answered in greeting, putting away my phone without taking the picture (it was too far away anyway). Staring up at him, I crossed my arms.

“You’re late.”

“Oh! Were you looking at the Cosmo Clock?” Dazai asked, moving to stand next to me, not even bothering to respond to my accusation.

He shielded his eyes with one hand and stared out into the distance at the tall metal structure.

“It’s definitely a sight to see at night when it’s all lit up and colorful but it’s pretty nice in the morning too...”

His brown eyes flicked down to meet mine and he smiled softly.

“A great place for a date, don’t you think?”

I glanced up at him. Standing next to him in the middle of the sidewalk on a beautiful day like this, I couldn’t help being reminded of the moment we’d first met. He gave off a different vibe in the early morning light, with the soft ocean breeze tugging at his messy brown locks and his irises glowing a rich, warm amber as he held my gaze.

Why was a man like Dazai Osamu blessed with such a beautiful face?

When he smiled at me like that, it was almost enough to make me forget all the teasing and practical jokes...

Almost...

“Yeah,” Dazai murmured, more to himself than to me as he returned his attention to the Ferris wheel. As if on cue, he continued, “Cosmo Clock 21 seems like a great place to commit suicide. I bet if I threw myself out of the top car, I would die the instant my body hit the pavement.”

I grimaced. I could all too easily picture an overly excitable Dazai opening the control panel inside his car, finding some way to override the safety protocols and swan-diving out of his car the instant he got to the top of the wheel.

“Well, I’m glad you didn’t off yourself this morning,” I said, covertly looking him up and down.

Good. It didn’t look like he’d gone for a swim in the river this morning. His clothes were dry and his entire ensemble looked like it had been recently cleaned. Our fancy downtown client should be pleased...

“If you had, you would’ve made my life a lot more difficult,” I sighed.

Dazai’s eyes widened.

“Kusunoki-kun...!” he whispered.

At once, he gathered my hands in his.

“I didn’t know you cared!” he whispered, his eyes sparkling joyfully as they stared into mine. “If you’d like, I’d be more than happy to take you to the Ferris wheel, maybe even accompany you to the afterlife—”

“That’s not what I was talking about,” I said casually, snatching my hands away with barely a hint of a blush. “What I meant to say was that I don’t know anything about this case we’ve been assigned to. I was just told to come here and meet you at seven in the morning, speaking of which...”

I flicked out my phone and shoved it in his face.

“You’re ten minutes late! You better have a good excuse for this because it’s going in the report. When Kunikida-san—no, President Fukuzawa reads it—”

“But Kusunoki-kun,” Dazai said, sounding surprised, “I was here early! In fact, I got here before you did and decided to make a convenience store run. See? I even got you coffee!”

He started rummaging through a small plastic bag that I hadn’t noticed he was carrying and pulled out a small canned latte. I was taken aback.

“Huh?” was all I could say as Dazai put the cold drink in my hands.

“What am I supposed to do with you, Kusunoki-kun?” Dazai sighed, shaking his head. “Here I am, trying to be a good mentor by making sure you got up in time for your next big case but what happens when I call you? Every single one of my well-meaning wake-up calls went straight to voicemail! I bet you didn’t even check your inbox this morning when you woke up.”

He was right. I hadn’t. As he spied the guilty look on my face, Dazai crossed his bandaged arms and pouted.

“And to think,” he said sullenly, “the first thing my kohai says to me when I come back, after waiting such a long time in those long morning lines is ‘you’re late?’”

He shook his head again and out of guilt, I dropped my gaze, only to stare right at the cold beverage in my hands. At once, the sense of guilt mutated into shame.

“I... I’m sorry,” I mumbled, bowing my head slightly. “It’s just... after the exam...”

Dazai gasped.

“Wait a minute... Are you blocking my calls?”

“Not exactly...”

Truth was, I’d actually put my phone into airplane mode last night after finishing up my texts with Atsushi because I didn’t want to receive any annoying late-night texts from Dazai or get pranked first thing in the morning again. Thanks to that, I’d gotten a full night’s rest (and before a Dazai case, no less!) but at what cost...?

“Airplane mode, huh?” Dazai pieced together and I winced. “That’s cold, Kusunoki-kun. Do you dislike me that much?”

“I said I was sorry!” I protested as he shook his head again, “And the first thing I said to you when you showed up was ‘good morning,’ not just ‘you’re late!’ And I really did mean it when I said I was glad you didn’t off yourself—Dazai-san, I—!”

I felt the words catching in my throat but I needed to get them out.

I couldn’t let Dazai think I hated him.

I squeezed my eyes shut, my hands balling into fists and I spoke in a rush:

“I don’t dislike you at all—! In fact, I—”

But before I could finish, something warm descended on the top of my head and when I looked up, I realized it was Dazai’s hand.

“I know,” he chuckled, ruffling my hair. “I was just messing with you. Don’t worry about it.”

He smiled. He was looking right at me but there was something wistful and faraway in his expression; I couldn’t place it.

“I know you don’t hate me,” he said quietly, still smiling that odd smile. “I just wanted my cute kohai to think better of me, is all.”

He folded up the convenience store bag and stuffed it into his coat.

“Let’s just go see the client, alright?”

“Dazai-san...”

Did it bother him that much that I didn’t pick up his calls? Was I being too harsh on him...?

As I watched him walk away, the tails of his trench coat flapping in the morning breeze, I slowly lifted my fingers to my lips.

And what was I about to say just before he stopped me?

Feeling oddly flustered, I directed my attention back to the can in my hands. It was still cold and my mouth felt oddly dry after that whole exchange. Not wanting to think about it any further, I pulled on the tab, opening the can of coffee with a sharp pop—and something big, black and hairy shot out of the can.

I screamed and dropped the can. As I stood there in the middle of the street, clutching my heart and panting like a dog, I heard a snort and looked up just in time to see Dazai burst into laughter.

“That was amazing!” he choked, clutching his stomach, “Absolutely priceless! I should take a photo of your face, this belongs in a museum—”

“What the hell?!” I screeched, flushing in anger as Dazai doubled over, howling with laughter as suit-wearing morning commuters and tourists alike stopped to stare at us.

“Well,” Dazai chortled, barely stifling his laughter behind his bandaged hands, “I could have gotten you a real coffee but then I thought, what kind of senpai would I be if I didn’t give you a real wake-up call?”

He dissolved into laughter once again and, bristling with rage, I snatched the can off the ground and lifted it to my face. It was one of those spring toys in a can, disguised to look like real food and designed to scare the living daylights out of whoever was foolish enough to open it. The hairy black thing I’d seen was nothing more than a plush spider toy with googly eyes and pipe-cleaner legs, bouncing about from the open end of the can. And as Dazai’s laughter echoed in my ears, one corner of the label peeled off; he had taken the label off a real can of coffee and stuck it to the outside of this toy. Which left only one question.

“Why is this thing cold?!” I roared, hurling the can at Dazai’s face as his laughter finally subsided.

“Oho, very observant, Kusunoki-kun!” Dazai cried, easily dodging my attack. “I knew I’d have to go above and beyond to fool you, so I stuck this can in the ice cream freezer at the convenience store before bringing it over!”

“You what?!”

“Oh, don’t glare at me like that,” Dazai waved me off, “Think of it as a compliment that I’d go to such lengths to trick you. But enough about that. We’re late and we really shouldn’t keep the client waiting. Wouldn’t be good for the Agency’s reputation, you know? Come on!”

Glowering and cursing under my breath, I hiked my bag higher over my shoulder and swore never to accept any presents from Dazai in the future, no matter how small or insignificant.

***

“Kusunoki-kun...”

Dazai sounded pretty dejected but I refused to look at him. I would not be fooled by those big brown puppy-dog eyes twice in the same morning.

“I get that you’re mad but you don’t have to stand that far away from me...”

“I’m not standing far away from you at all,” I replied coolly. “In fact, if I could, I’d actually be standing much further away but unfortunately, there’s not that much room in this elevator...”

“And you say you’re not cold,” Dazai mumbled.

I could actually hear the pout in his voice but I just rolled my eyes and ignored him.

After that stunt he pulled with the fake coffee, I was half-seriously considering returning to the Agency and asking to be reassigned. But then I realized that if I went back, I might run into Kunikida and be forced to admit (to my crush) that I couldn’t handle being on a case with Dazai for even an hour... And I’d rather throw myself off the top of the Ferris wheel than face Kunikida’s disappointment. So I settled for refusing to talk to Dazai as much as I possibly could, even as I followed him into the maze of buildings and crosswalks downtown with no idea of our destination.

Unfortunately for me, Dazai looked so happy about the results of his prank that he didn’t seem to mind that I was barely speaking to him. Every once in a while, he’d look over his shoulder to check that I was still following along and shoot me a cheerful grin every time he did. He kept this up until we stopped before a tall, strikingly rectangular building bearing the name “Tanaka Investments” in glossy white lettering. Like the other buildings downtown, the structure seemed to be made entirely of black and gray tinted glass instead of metal but I only had a few seconds to peer up at it before the crowd of morning commuters pushed us forward and into the building.

Together, Dazai and I streamed in through the main entrance, along with a gaggle of the building’s employees, heading, it seemed, towards the elevators in the back. As we got in, I noticed Dazai getting an occasional odd look at the bandages around his neck and arms but other than that, the workers seemed to pay us no mind; overall, they seemed pretty busy with their phones and schedules. When the girl nearest the elevator buttons happened to glance his way, Dazai instantly brightened up.

“Top floor, please,” he said, smiling pleasantly and the girl instantly blushed and hurried to push the button he’d requested.

Rolling my eyes, I quietly navigated my way towards the back of the elevator, purposefully turning the other way when I noticed Dazai looking for me. If he asked, I’d tell him I was doing this out of courtesy and that I was just trying to stay out of the way of the other building employees. However, the truth was, I was hoping to put as much distance between me and Dazai as possible and I made no move to hide the tiny smile that popped up on my face as more and more people packed into the elevator between us.

But as we climbed higher and higher through the building, the crowd began to thin and eventually the number of people standing between me and Dazai slowly dwindled to zero. That’s when he started trying to get my attention again...

“Come on, Kusunoki-kun,” Dazai wheedled, “If you’re not going to look at me, you could at least move a little closer so I don’t have to shout for you to hear me. I still need to tell you about the client.”

“I can hear you just fine from over here,” I stated flatly, staring resolutely at the numbers above the door as the elevator continued to rise.

“Come on, please?”

I didn’t budge.

“Please? Pretty please, pretty lady?”

Crossing my arms, I scowled. This was nothing like the time I’d taken the tiny elevator up to the Agency office with Kunikida... Nothing at all...

What I wouldn’t give to be in here with Kunikida instead... He wouldn’t whine and pester me like this. And he wouldn’t have pranked me this morning either. I closed my eyes and let a small, happy smile cross my face.

Hmm... then again, if it was Kunikida, I wouldn’t mind getting a little closer...

“Alright then,” Dazai sighed, finally realizing I wasn’t going to move at all. “If you won’t come to me...”

I heard a series of soft, echoing clicks from Dazai’s dress shoes as he slowly approached me from the opposite corner of the elevator.

“Then I’ll just have to come to you.”

His voice was low, sultry... just like it was yesterday afternoon, when he’d backed me up against the locked conference room door and whispered softly into my ear...

“...I’d like you to do something for me.”

I could still feel the warmth of his breath against my cheek, see the softly heated look in his deep brown eyes... His lips parted smoothly into that relaxed, easy smile...

“Come away with me...”

It was so cold the night he walked me home. The brightness of his smile had not been enough to obscure the shadows in his eyes...

Forever.

I came to with a sharp gasp, abruptly realizing that Dazai was about two seconds away from trapping me against a wall the way he’d done twice already. In a flustered panic, I uprooted my feet and tried to make a break for it—

—only to crash right into Dazai.

“Kusunoki-kun!”

His eyebrows shot up into his hair as I bounced off of him with a painful smack and his smirk widened into an ecstatic grin.

“Were you looking for a hug?” he asked, opening his arms wide. “I’d love one!”

“Oh, shut up,” I groaned, rubbing my nose where it’d collided with his chest. “Just tell me about the client already.”

Dazai wilted.

“You sure you don’t want a hug?”

“I’m sure. Case briefing, please?”

Dazai sighed heavily. He stuffed his hands in his pockets and shot me a disappointed look.

“Yosano-sensei was right...” he mumbled, kicking an invisible pebble on the floor. “If you spend too much time with Kunikiiiiiida-kun, you really will turn into a four-eyed workhorse too.”

“Will you stop insulting Kunikida-san and just tell me about the client?! We’re almost at the top floor and I still don’t know who we’re meeting with!”

As if on cue, the elevator suddenly stopped moving. Thinking we’d arrived at the top floor, I looked up at the display above the door, only to see that we were still ten stories away. I turned to Dazai but he just yawned widely and stretched his bandaged arms high above his head as a sound like a buzzer sounded throughout our hollow metal chamber. There was a quiet cough and then a voice crackled to life over an unseen speaker.

“Identification, please.”

“We’re from the Armed Detective Agency,” Dazai said before I could answer. “We were asked to meet with a client on the top floor this morning.”

There was a pause and then the voice spoke again, more irritated this time.

“You’re late.”

I heard another loud buzz and with the tiniest of tremors, the elevator started moving again. I stared at Dazai.

“Who... are we meeting with...?”

He shot me a grin.

“The company president,” he answered, tucking his hands back into his pockets. “Tanaka Ichiro.”

There was a soft chime and as I turned just in time to see the elevator doors sliding open with a faint whoosh. I peered out beyond the doors into what appeared to be a very bright light and I raised my hands up to shield my eyes. When my eyes had settled, I realized I was staring into an enormous, empty lobby, one with very high walls and very pale coloring.

Silently, I followed Dazai out of the elevator and into the monochrome chamber, the heels of our shoes making sharp, echoing clicks against the hard, shiny surface of what seemed to be a faux-white-marble floor. All around us were large, rectangular tinted windows, each as high as the ceiling itself, where a modern-looking geometric chandelier, if you could call it that, hung in the very center of the room.

Below it, was a single desk, made of the exact same material as the floor, and it was so seamlessly integrated with the surroundings that I wouldn’t have been surprised if they were all carved from a single stone. Everything was spotless and polished to a shine and I looked out the windows to see sweeping views of the ocean and Mirato Mirai on one side and the rest of downtown Yokohama on the other.

Standing behind the desk was a very cross-looking man in a gray suit and tie with slicked-back black hair and thin rectangular glasses perched on his long, thin nose; with his narrowed eyes and set, square jaw, he looked especially forbidding where Kunikida merely looked strict. I decided to hang back a little as Dazai approached the desk.

“Morning,” Dazai greeted, with a casual wave of his half-bandaged hand. “You’re the gatekeeper?”

“My name is Shimada,” the man replied, his lips barely moving as he spoke, “President Tanaka’s personal bodyguard.”

One of his thick black eyebrows rose higher on his forehead and he shifted a little,   his hand going to his belt as he studied Dazai and then me. His expression soured slightly.

“You’re... the detectives?”

If Dazai was insulted at his tone, he didn’t show it. While I discreetly examined my outfit for any sign of dirt, Dazai grinned broadly at him and stepped forward.

“That’s right.”

He draped the crook of his bandaged elbow over the top of the desk and as he leaned his weight on it, Shimada’s jaw tightened visibly.

“We’re the detectives,” Dazai said smoothly, “Sorry we’re late.”

“The President is a busy man,” Shimada said icily. “He cannot afford to be kept waiting. Time is money, you know.”

“Of course,” Dazai chirped, deliberately rubbing his dingy-looking bandages against the countertop and for a brief moment, I actually felt sorry for Shimada.

That moment ended when I saw Shimada reach inside his desk and before I knew what was happening, he whipped out a thick black rod and swung it towards Dazai’s head.

“Dazai!!”

I rushed forward, intent on pushing Dazai out of harm’s way but the tell-tale crack of metal against skull never came. The rod came to an abrupt stop just a centimeter away from Dazai’s temple, barely ruffling the hairs on his head and as I looked on in shock, I saw Dazai’s grin widen.

He hadn’t moved at all...!

“I see the reputation of the Armed Detective Agency is well-earned,” Shimada muttered under his breath.

He moved the rod away and as he did so, I realized that I wasn’t looking at an actual weapon but at a handheld metal detector. Still wearing that shit-eating grin, Dazai stood up straight and put out his arms as Shimada came out from behind the desk and began scanning him. When he was satisfied that Dazai was carrying no weapons, Shimada nodded and went back to his desk.

“You will show President Tanaka your utmost respect while you are talking to him,” Shimada said, putting away the detector. “See to it that you don’t waste his time.”

Keeping his right hand against his belt, Shimada pushed a button from somewhere inside his desk and the closed black-paneled doors behind him opened at last.

“Thanks,” Dazai chirped.

He patted Shimada on the shoulder as he passed by and I saw the man flinch.

Taking a deep breath, I hiked my bag a little higher over my shoulder and stepped forward, preparing to be scanned as well. But to my surprise, Shimada barely gave me a second glance before putting down his metal detector and gestured for me to step through the doors as well.

“You’re not going to scan me?” I asked, confused.

Shimada shook his head.

“I don’t need to.”

“W-why not?” I asked, my grip tightening on my bag.

I don’t like his tone...

“Because,” Shimada stated simply, “you’re not a threat.”

I bristled.

“How do you know I’m not carrying a weapon?”

Shimada’s lip curled unpleasantly.

“Because if you were,” he said, a nasty sneer blooming on his face, “You would’ve used it on me to save your partner. Now are you going in or not?”

“I—”

“Kusunoki-kun.”

A weight settled around my shoulder and I looked up to see that Dazai had thrown his arm around me. He pulled me in close, effectively tugging me away from the sneering Shimada and guided me towards the doors.

“You heard the man,” Dazai said, his voice sounding right next to my ear, “We’ve got a client to see.”

And as he led me away, I glanced back at Shimada, only to see that the man had a gun in his hand.

My eyes widened.

“D-Dazai-san—” I whispered, looking up at him in alarm.

But Dazai merely smiled and put his finger to his lips.

“I’ll explain later,” his expression seemed to say.

Swallowing, I nodded and shot another furtive look over my shoulder at Shimada, who was now scrubbing at the counter top with a wet wipe, where Dazai had leaned against it and smudged its pristine, white surface.

The black paneled doors closed behind us and we found ourselves in a much smaller room, one that so resembled a normal office that it made the outside lobby and the whole thing with the elevator seem even stranger by contrast. The walls were lined with bookshelves full of thick binders and leather-bound books and there was a polished wooden desk in the middle of the room, under which was an exquisitely patterned Persian rug. Sitting at this desk with his hands folded in front of him was a rather cheerful-looking man in his mid-thirties. There was a streak of white in his otherwise brown hair and as we approached the desk, he stood to greet us.

“You must be the detectives,” he said, spreading his arms. “Welcome, welcome. I am Tanaka Ichiro, the president of this fine establishment. Please, have a seat. Make yourselves comfortable.”

As he moved out a little from behind the desk, I thought I saw something in the trash can nearby, something with black feathers...

I heard my own sharp intake of breath when I realized it was a dead bird and upon hearing me, Tanaka’s smile widened; he pulled the trash can out of sight and quickly sat back down.

“May I offer you some refreshment?” Tanaka asked, “Hot tea, perhaps?”

“N-no thanks,” I mumbled, still wondering about the dead bird.

“Then I could turn up the heat,” Tanaka offered, “if you’re cold.”

“Huh? It’s not...”

I trailed off as Dazai tightened his grip around me to give me a brief around the shoulders hug.

Oh.

Dazai took his arm off of me before I could throw it off for him and bowed politely, forcing me to follow suit.

“Dazai Osamu and Kusunoki Kyou of the Armed Detective Agency at your service,” he said smoothly, suddenly sounding just as professional as Kunikida. “What can we do for you?”

Tanaka pointed to the two chairs on our side of the desk and Dazai and I sat.

“I do believe we are short on time,” Tanaka said, as I shot Dazai a nasty look, “so I’ll get right to the point. Over the last few months, we’ve seen a series of thefts take place at the company but the thief has only stolen money from a single account. Unfortunately, it is a rather important account—one we use to pay our yearly business expenses.”

He took out a plain manila folder from his desk and slid it towards us. Dazai took it but opened it up in a way that I’d have to scoot towards him to read it. Struggling not to roll my eyes, I pushed my chair towards his.

“That first page will show you screenshots of the account in question, month to month,” Tanaka continued. “As you can see, it’s no small amount that was taken.”

My eyes widened.

Holy shit. There had been enough here to cover my yearly rent ten times over. What sort of business expenses would cost so much?!

“It’s been drained,” Dazai said, flipping the page. “Several times. You didn’t increase security around the account the first time it happened?”

“We did,” Tanaka admitted, “but the thief somehow got around the changes every single time. We can’t change the account for reasons I won’t go into but it’s baffling to say the least.”

“Thief...” I said slowly, glancing up at Tanaka. “Why do you say ‘thief,’ as if you’re certain it’s one person? Did you already have someone in mind?”

Tanaka rubbed his chin. He looked pleased.

“Very good. We do, actually,” he said. “Turn to the third page.”

I flipped through the file to see a picture of an older man, somewhere around Mrs. Yamazaki’s age, if I had to guess. He wore a pair of large, clunky square glasses, making his already dark, tiny eyes appear even darker and tinier and beneath his slightly hooked nose he had a bushy mustache and beard with streaks of gray. In all honesty, he looked a little like a Japanese Santa Claus.

I squinted at it.

Tsushima looked vaguely familiar, although at the moment, I couldn’t quite place where I’d seen him. Had I passed him in the street before?

“That is Tsushima Shuji, one of our best and highest ranking accountants. He had access to every account in this investment company, including our most secretive business dealings and he disappeared about a month ago without a trace.” “Right when the last theft took place,” Dazai said.

“Correct,” Tanaka replied. “We think he had something to do with it but we haven’t been able to find him. We ran our own internal investigations, of course, but so far it’s turned up nothing. Normally, at this point in time, we’d be asking the Yokohama Police Department to investigate but the situation is rather delicate.”

“I see,” Dazai mumbled. “So you want us to find this Tsushima Shuji.”

“And recover the money.”

Tanaka steepled his fingers together and looked at us.

“We are a highly successful investment firm but we do still have debts to pay. And they must be paid very, very soon if this company is to survive...”

“It’s almost the first of next month,” I pieced together aloud, flipping through the printouts. “You want us to solve this case before the account can be drained again.”

“Exactly.”

Tanaka looked down at his wrist, where a clunky gold watch gleamed alongside his cufflinks.

“Forgive me for my rudeness, but we are out of time. I cannot, unfortunately, provide anything more for you than these printouts due to the security issues around the account and the employee files. But I think this should be enough to start with. If you need more, please, don’t hesitate to give myself or Shimada-san a call.”

“Of course.”

I swept the folder full of files into my messenger bag and stood to take the pair of business cards from Tanaka.

As I reached up to pinch the cards between my fingers, taking care to avoid touching any part of Tanaka’s skin, his shrewd brown eyes swept over me.

“Kusunoki-san, was it?” he asked, as I half-nodded, half-bowed. “I don’t think I’ve heard your name before. Are you new to the Armed Detective Agency?”

“Somewhat,” I mumbled, avoiding his probing gaze.

I didn’t feel like answering any further but Tanaka wasn’t finished with me yet.

“I see,” Tanaka continued, peering more closely at me.

He looked like he was trying to figure out if he’d seen me before but to the best of my recollection, this was my first time meeting him. His smile held no warmth.

“Have you been enjoying your time with the Agency so far?”

I honestly wasn’t sure how to answer that and I really didn’t like the way he was looking at me. But before I could speak, I felt Dazai put his hand on my shoulder.

“Kusunoki-kun is our valued colleague,” the bandaged detective said, directing his full attention towards Tanaka. “We’re really lucky to have her.”

Dazai smiled and without meaning to, I flinched. This wasn’t the usual, cheerful smile I’d gotten used to seeing from Dazai. No. The look in his eyes was cold and calculating and his smile seemed to function more as a warning than a gesture of good will. I forced myself to keep still as Dazai turned those frigid brown eyes on me.

“We should get going,” Dazai said gently, the warmth in his expression returning the instant his eyes met mine.

I nodded.

“Tanaka-san, we’ll check in with you in a few days?”

“Please do,” Tanaka replied.

Polite bows were exchanged once again and Dazai and I turned around to leave. Dazai’s large, half-bandaged hand remained on my shoulder and I could still feel Tanaka’s eyes on me as we departed. However, after seeing the look on Dazai’s face as he’d stared Tanaka down, I couldn’t tell if the weight of the man’s hand on my shoulder was comforting or not. I found myself unable to move any closer to him.

Dazai didn’t drop his hand until we were well out into the lobby, but just after he did, Tanaka called out to us once again.

“Oh and Dazai-san? Kusunoki-san?”

We turned and Tanaka’s smile widened.

“Best of luck,” he said as those black-paneled doors came to a close.

***

“This could get dangerous for you, Kusunoki-kun,” Dazai said as we exited the building.

“How so?”

In the seemingly short time we’d spent in Tanaka’s office, the sun had climbed a little higher in the sky, warming the downtown zone by that much more. I found myself wishing Dazai had actually brought me an iced coffee instead of a joke toy this morning and was about to shrug off my light coat when I noticed Dazai was watching me. I kept the coat on as we walked down the street.

“Is this about Tanaka-san?” I asked.

Or the way he’d looked at me?

“Not quite.”

Dazai paused to study me.

“Let me ask you... What do you think that account was used for? The ‘business expense account.’ It’s a lot of money, don’t you think?”

I shrugged. I was avoiding his gaze and I knew that Dazai could tell but if it bothered him, he didn’t let it show.

“Tanaka said it was for business expenditures, didn’t he?” I answered, hiking the strap of my bag a little higher over my shoulder as it slipped. “I can’t say I know much about investment firms but I wouldn’t be surprised if these were for another company they’re working with.”

I paused.

“Why do you ask? Do you think this account’s being used for something else?”

“Sort of.”

We paused at the crosswalk as the light turned red and Dazai dropped his voice so low it was actually hard to hear him.

“It’s been a while since I’ve heard someone refer to it as a ‘business expenditure,’ but I wouldn’t be surprised if they were paying back either debts or protection money to the Port Mafia. Many businesses in this area are, especially some of the bigger ones with more complicated connections.”

He jerked his thumb back towards the building.

“How do you think such a newly established investment firm got so big so quick that they ended up moving into one of the bigger buildings downtown, right in the middle of Port Mafia turf?”

I balked.

“Seriously?”

Dazai nodded and I took a moment to think.

“So if that’s true then that means...” I thought aloud, “the person stealing from this account...”

“He’s stealing directly from the Port Mafia,” Dazai finished for me.

No sooner had Dazai finished speaking than a sound like a thunderclap echoed throughout the streets. Tremors shook the ground and as I fought to regain my footing, I turned around just in time to see columns of thick, black smoke pouring out of the shattered windows of the top floor of Tanaka Investments.

#bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs #bsd #dazai x oc #dazai #dazai x reader #fanfiction

[calypsoff]

Thirty Three. Part 4

Chris fell asleep on the couch, I kind of figured he was tired when he was looking at me moody and without love, that boy fell asleep as soon as he got on the couch “do you have a blanket? I just want to put it on him” I got up from the couch asking Clinton “there is one in his room” nodding my head walking around him “does he always have a nap?” I assume he does “yes, he does. He gets tired a lot but I think because he’s not doing anything he just gets tired and bored, I hope he starts to snap out of it. I’m glad he actually lets me be here, he refused his mother being here. He said he didn’t want her to see him in that way, I get it. Some things I’ve helped him with is private, but he’s my boy. My baby boy, I’ll do anything for him but he’s stubborn” shaking my head lightly “I knows he’s very stubborn, I don’t know what made him that way because when he was younger he wasn’t” he really wasn’t that way at all “I think being locked up, he came out very different. I remember when I first saw him, I hugged him because he’s my boy and he was just like ok, move. He stayed in his room for a while, I was so scared. We assumed that someone probably did something to him, but he spoke on it, he just said he felt drained from it but from then on. His personality changed, he wasn’t the boy I knew but he’s there, I feel like you have bought that to him. The wall he built; you’re knocking that down. When he was dating another girl, he was not good. He was cheating and not caring, and I feel she was bad for him, but you. I thank you; Chris’ fun loving side comes out” I cooed out “it’s been difficult, some tears happened. He has made me cry. He’s refused to accept me at times but he’s getting there, I’m just going to get the blanket” I pointed as I walked off, I love Clinton he’s such a gentle man.

Grabbing the blanket from the corner, my eyes widened seeing the framed picture on the corner chair “what” I breathed out, Chris has a picture of me, just me. He had a framed picture of me and it’s pulling at my heartstrings now, poppa is such a cutie. Was he hiding this, or maybe he just put there. Placing the frame back on the corner table, he is so cute. I was literally fresh from Barbados and just signed my contract, out of every picture I have he chose this, I am shocked. I must be about eighteen here, I can’t believe it. Walking off with the blanket in hand, I am smiling so wide right now. I cannot believe he has a picture of me like that, I feel like he is nostalgic I don’t know but it’s cute “you found something in there? You’re smiling very wide” I giggled to myself “did you know Chris has a picture of me on his side table? Like a really old one? My forehead was even worse” placing the blanket over Chris laughing to myself “oh yeah the picture, he was telling Joyce how much he missed you and then Joyce asked him what his favourite picture was, and he picked that, and she got it him, Joyce said then she can always see you. But I was like son why that picture? It’s seems very old, and she is so young, beautiful but young and he said just makes him smile because it reminded him of you smiling at him when you would do homework, he’s being very nostalgic about you, but yeah. It’s rather funny but cute” what is he like, Chris makes me laugh “I was just shocked to see that I wasn’t expecting such an old picture. Ok it’s nice to see he misses me but that” sitting down on the couch “oh my son does love you, a lot. You want something to drink?” Clinton asked “erm, may I have some water thank you” I could ask Clinton lots of things now Chris is asleep.

Clinton is a good man “I always wanted ask you this, even when you popped over to the house when you were younger. Chris would always tell me; be nice her dad is mean. What is your relationship with your dad now, I never got to ask because Chris always told me to keep my mouth closed” I wasn’t expecting this question “erm, I would say it’s more hi and bye, we don’t have that bond, I can’t say we do but I would never disrespect him. He did things I don’t agree with and even now he’s using my name so yeah, I don’t have a good relationship with him. Never really did and it hurts, Chris has been a very good man to me. Like I didn’t at first trust Chris because I didn’t trust a man because I was scared of them, when I told Chris about my past he was so good to me and he understood and for him to tell you that, wow. He does really care” he is so sweet “I just can’t wait for my kids to have a great dad like Chris, that is because he witnessed how good you are to him. He’s going to be a good dad and that’s what I want, like I didn’t just want a baby out of thin air like he assumed at the time, but I knew how good he will be and how he has such a supportive family. I feel so happy and secure to hear that Chris is now being open to it, but I am just going to wait this out. I am not going to be pushing on having a baby, I will let it happen when it happens” Clinton is a good listener and I love that about him, he adores me too “that is good, when I found out about your miscarriage. It hurt me, my grandchild and that happened. It’s sad and I said to Joyce is Robyn ok, is her wellbeing ok, is her mind ok. But she said Chris has got her and she is doing well. I think when someone loses a child it is always sad, it’s hurtful. I know my son will always be there for you, no matter his stubbornness. I wasn’t best pleased about him going to the baby shower because nothing good comes out of it, he said dad. Robyn and I are strong, who cares. So Robyn, I would be proud of my son, he is becoming the man I had wanted and that is thanks to you” waving Clinton off “he has been speaking very much on the future with him, I am excited” I smiled.

Clinton is boring as fuck though, he is watching the news “oh it’s funny actually, I was watching the news and I see Rihanna. Your name on there, my friend pointed and spoke. Ain’t that your daughter in law” I chuckled “it made me laugh, I am not about that stardom thing. I said to Joyce are we ready for a big wedding” I laughed out “well you know I am going to be your daughter in law, I will be a Brown, so you know. You got to accept it, but it won’t be public. It will be private, look what you are making me do. Talking about marriage now. You will scare Chris” lucky he is not awake because if he was he would not be happy at all “my son should be blessed to have such a lovely girl like you, you are so sweet and caring. Like people think it’s all about looks, when I met Joyce. She is a beautiful lady, white, different coloured eyes and there is me” Clinton laughed “marry her, you need to marry her now or she will cheat. You’re not good enough for her, look at her. This is all I heard, I got it. I knew it, I knew Joyce is beautiful, she is still beautiful now. Did it make me feel insecure, a little any man would but did I ever think she would cheat on me? No, because she loves me and I see it with Chris. He mentions it a little bit, Robyn is beautiful. Everyone wants her, why me and I said son, I have been through it, don’t worry. As a man we feel insecure and that is because we see what agenda other men want to do, but I understand him, but he has a good girl. You remind me of Joyce, and I love that for him” it is so sweet to hear about Joyce and Clinton “I am literally in awe, did you fall in love with Joyce, or did she fall in love with you?” I questioned “erm, good question. It was her; I say that because I wasn’t confident, I wasn’t confident but yeah. I would say she was, she had to take the lead. But all is well, it’s what is in the heart” I am literally glued to this “wow, we are like you both, awww oh my god!” we are like Joyce and Clinton.

I decided to go with TJ to get some food, Chris is actually asleep still and I am bored. I know like I shouldn’t actually be going out in VA; my security would be livid but it’s VA. It’s quiet and boring, who the hell will care for me “you think I need to buy this?” TJ held up ear defenders, raising my eyebrow “nigga get the fuck outta here” snatching it from him “I am just saying, poor Clinton doesn’t need to hear it, I mean we heard” pushing him laughing “I hate you ok, I ain’t having sex with him. Now get walking” TJ laughed walking ahead of me “I am just saying yo, like I am not flexing or anything. But like we cool and all that but like, can I take a picture with you” licking my lips laughing “it’s nice to know that people actually ask, of course come on” waving him over, that is nice he asked “hurry up though, because if anyone sees me I don’t want that either” taking my shades off, placing my arm on his shoulder as he lifted his arm up to take a selfie “you look like a fan, I like that” I laughed “yo, thank you. Like I didn’t want to come off as a fan you know. But yeah, can I post it?” he pointed, placing my shades back on “sure, by the way. You’re paying for this little Target trip, I only came here to get food and you did the detour” if he thinks I am paying, he got another thing coming “I came here for movie night, the hell. You are adding shit to it too” I will just not say anything and just let him pay because I am not.

Chris’ eyes lit up, he is awake “erm, where did you go and why did you go? You’re supposed to be inside Robyn, what if anyone sees you?” he is so concerned “I am ok Chris, I bought myself a magazine to read and food, we came home with food too” pecking his lips “oh ok, I was concerned. Also we are supposed to spend time together” this nigga talking about spending time when he fell asleep on me “says the guy that fell asleep on me, anyways. Let’s sit at the table, let’s eat” Chris looks a little moody “you should have woke me, you’re not here for long. Ok I fell asleep, but you should have woke me Robyn, the hell” here we go “it doesn’t matter Chris, honestly. I am not upset about it Chris. I wanted you to get your rest, so please” touching the top of his head “me and your dad had a nice talk, I am happy. We will spend some time tonight; you will be awake then. You can have your medication late” pressing a kiss to the side of his head “ok” he mumbled, walking off to the kitchen “you’re back, I am glad because Chris wasn’t happy I let you go like I am your father. I said Chris I cannot stop her. He was just concerned; he will come in soon. Let him do his thing” looking behind me, Chris is just sat on the couch not moving, I would go there and tell him to come but I will just let him come when he is ready.

This food is nice, TJ said it was the best in VA and he was right “you and TJ” Chris turned his phone to me, looking at the picture “yeah, I had to take pictures with my fans, I mean he begged me” I laughed “I did no such thing, you’re annoying” TJ defended himself “you look so pretty, Robyn that is” I cooed out “thank you Chris” that is sweet of him, somehow I feel like Chris is not impressed “how about you post one of my photoshoot pictures” I know I shouldn’t but, I feel like he is a little jealous he wasn’t there “can I?” he said a little confused “yes but not the cover, you can upload the one where you said is that what I look like, you know. The mirror thing” I hope he gets it “oh yeah, can I though? Like you not going to be in trouble” shaking my head “go for it baby but tag the photographer and rollingstone and me. Make it a cute caption too” I winked at him, they may or maybe not angry with me, but I want to make him happy “you seen this, Robyn had a photoshoot. This is what she looks like” Chris showed both his dad and TJ, Clinton looked down smiling “how beautiful does she look, I am speechless. Look at her” TJ’ eyes widened “you are winning bro, like for real” he dapped him, smiling at him just smiling, least he is happy.

I do this a lot, I watch Chris. I like to see what he does and how he gets by, even how he gets changed and its hard work for him. Imagine having a cast all the way up your thigh, then he got an infection which is his own fault. I wanted to help but I am not going to get in his way, he wants to do it “big dick problems” Chris laughed fixing his boxers “man, first day here. I had to get my dad to help me. Shit was horrible, I didn’t want my friends to do it, I just felt like shit, so I forced myself to learn, it’s hard and tiring but I do it. You see I do it” nodding my head “is this you ready for bed now?” I think so anyways, he has his boxers on and no top “yes ma’am I am” watching him shuffle onto the bed “not going to lie Robyn, I don’t want sex” my face dropped, dropped more in shock then anything “huh?” is this a joke “I don’t want you to be riding me like this, I don’t feel confident Robyn. I don’t want it” Chris shook his head, he looks a little deflated “Chris, it’s fine. I just you know I assumed but that is fine Chris, you don’t need to be upset about it” I don’t want him to be upset about it but he has been ever so horny so this is weird “I don’t feel comfortable, like I am not. I just feel weird saying this to you also, it’s shit but I can’t, I really can’t. It’s different being on FaceTime, yes I am horny but I can’t, I ain’t that confident right now” maybe it’s the look on my face making him sad “let me jerk you off or something?” I feel useless, does he feel overwhelmed with me.

#Chrianna FF #Chrianna #Chrianna Fanfiction #Fanfic #Fanfiction