#I think the biggest thing I'm trying to get

[luna-has-some-thoughts]

Pt2Danny Accidentally becomes the Ghost king, the president and the biggest threat to Bruce's social status.

Pt 1 link:

Part 2 Danny becomes the president.

Amity Parkers are the most adaptable people in the world. They're barely fazed by anything.

If you throw them into a situation that they are very unfamiliar with, it'll only take them five minutes to adjust before they start planning on how to live with this situation.

The Amity Parker mindset is: "Oh, I guess this is happening now."

So when the ghosts start attacking? The Amity Parkers immediately look for ways to avoid and protect themselves from the ghosts, not even questioning why ghosts are real. The only thing they think about is, "Damn, there's a ghost. I hope it doesn't attack the theater; I really want to see that movie."

When Phantom had his debut as a hero? The Amity Parkers started looking for ways to help, ways to keep out of his way (some to try and keep him away). The thought running through their minds was, "So this one is trying to protect us? Guess we have a hero now."

Amity Parkers don't spend their time getting mad at the sudden change of routine, the sudden loss of normalcy, or the broken buildings. Amity Parkers don't ask why and how ghosts are real, don't question if all ghosts are evil or if there are some good ghosts, and don't even think of how to get rid of them completely (they're part of the community now). They only look for ways to keep themselves from getting overshadowed. They definitely don't spend time thinking if the ghosts could bring more danger in the future or looking for more information for possible contingency plans. They aren't Batman; they believe that if the present is good, then the future will be better.

Point is, Amity Parkers are resilient and adaptable. They will take everything in stride and focus on the present. So what if some ghosts attack and block the street? They need to get to work, so they'll just drive around it.

After the whole Pariah Dark thing, they become liminal, gaining some form of super strength and glowing eyes (symptoms vary based on how strong the radiation on a person is). A normal human would think, "OH MY GOD, I'M DYING!" The Amity Parkers went, "Oh, cool, this is cool, but now I'm having a problem with opening doors without breaking the knob. Maybe the Fentons could do something about it, make stronger knobs or something."

When some babies started gaining some inhuman features? Some start floating? (Sharper ears, fangs. Babies adapt to things faster, so they get more ecto radiation.) The Amity parents went, "Is there a way to keep my child on the ground without leashing them like a dog?" Then proceeded to make a help blog for other Amity parents dealing with the same things.

So when the ghosts start becoming more of the community rather than enemies, the Amity Parkers just shrugged and asked for a book of ghost customs so they don't accidentally offend them.

When the Fentons started making ghost and human-safe items, no one even questioned why Danny had so much money and was funding his parents' research.

When Danny's name was almost (if not) in everything and he seemed to own most of the town, no one questioned it.

But everything changed when the GIW came again. Even the Amity Parkers weren't expecting this change.

The GIW waltzed in, claiming the liminal town was theirs to play with and started attacking everyone, including the Amity Parkers. The Amity Parkers went full defense mode, protecting the ghosts that were now their friends/neighbors/lovers, making sure that nothing would harm them.

They learned that it was Vlad who called on the GIW. He was pissed and petty that the crown was taken from him and decided to report his liminal town, pretending to be a "concerned mayor" who "wants his people to be healed."

The Amity Parkers were mad... they were furious.

And in the moment they saw Phantom fall to the ground, unconscious, and watched him de-transform from the hero King Phantom to the kid that owns and funds the most helpful companies in town, something changed. Something in the Amity Parkers changed.

Keep in mind that Amity Parkers don't change; they remain the same as they adapt to whatever change the world throws at them.

NEVER ONCE HAD THE AMITY PARKERS DECIDED TO MAKE A CHANGE THEMSELVES.

The first thing they changed? Their mentality. NEVER AGAIN WERE THEY GOING TO LET OUTSIDE FACTORS CHANGE THEIR LIVES. THIS IS THEIR TOWN AND IT WILL STAY THAT WAY.

God help the GIW for being their first victims.

An angry town of liminals, ghosts, and borderline gods, who have access to the Fentons' very destructive and effective technology.

Vs.

The regular GIW humans with anti-ghost tech they stole from the Fentons and nothing against liminals.

The battle was a swift victory, destroying not only the GIW in town but also all of its branches (and Vlad) with almost no traces of them even existing in the first place.

The change didn't stop there, however.

The Amity Parkers banded together with Team Phantom and the Fentons (minus Danny, as he is healing and shouldn't know about their plans; the hero should rest) and took out some of that ghost king money that Danny's trying to get rid of. They crashed the UN meeting while kidnapping the president of America.

The Amity Parkers have decided that Amity Park is theirs; it belongs to the people and its heroes. But how is it supposed to be truly theirs if they have to follow the rules of the country that funded the GIW?

A couple of death threats, bribing, more death threats and more money bribing to make sure the anti ecto acts are gone and the League of Bitches (Phantom called the JL that, and the Amity Parkers decided it was true) doesn't know about it, and a couple of hours in the nightmare realm (courtesy of Fright Knight, who happily participated when he found out what happened), and Amity Park was now its own independent country.

They decided that Tucker was to be a main part of security, letting him put up another firewall like the GIW did to make sure no one knows about their country. They don't want the League of Bitches or any outsider in the King's Haunt. It's theirs now; it belongs to the Ghost King of Amity Park, outsiders be gone.

And when it came to deciding who would be leader? There was no hesitation as they wrote down:

Daniel "Danny Phantom" Fenton, King of the Infinite Realms, King and President of Amity Park.

___________________

A couple of years later, Batman, finding hints of a "Lazarus pit" in Illinois, send Flash to look around for anything suspicious. Flash, hyper focused on following his gps, hits a wall, literally faceplants into it.He double checks his map, the wall wasn't supposed to be there. He goes around it, there no way in, no way out. He goes back to batman and reports.

Pt3 soon.

Tags as requested

@nana-mizu-shiki

@talia-scar123

#batman #danny phantom #danny fenton #dc x dp #dpxdc #amity parkers be like #amity park is liminal #everyone is liminal #danny doesnt know any of this. #there may or may not be murder. #there was no hesitation #seriously #peopole should be smarter #they should know not to mess with the supernatural #idiots #danny would be pissed #how dare you compare our clean ecto to those #contaminated pits #flash need to look at where he's going #loooooorrrrreeee #wes is an exception #since theres not much conspiracy theoriest in amity

[often-daydreaming]

Time Out

If you've seen The Sandman episode A Hope in Hell then you already know what I'm talking about but what if when the Justice League tries to summon the Ghost King for any number of reasons only they get Clockwork instead who forces them (or any hero really but I'm thinking of one of the Flashes or maybe Wonder Woman since Constantine has his own game planned for him) to play his favorite game, the oldest game and they have to win or else. He could genuinely be angry, I actually want to see a furious Clockwork more than ready to undo the very existence of the planet for daring to summon his protege but I can kind of see him messing around a little and playing up the whole titan of time, father of Zeus thing with the heroes as payback for messing around with the timelines so much.

It doesn't matter either way. What the Justice League wants isn't worth mentioning since Clockwork erased it from existence with barely a fraction of effort.

The biggest concern that has the entirety of Young Justice worried is the fact that the only person who got a free pass during that mess of a summoning was Bart and nobody can figure out why. Clockwork was more than willing to end the man of steel. He despised the other heroes and seemed annoyed at the sight of so many speedsters gathered together but after surveying the meeting room they used for the summoning he looked surprised then a little amused at the sight of Young Justice, smiling at Bart like he was genuinely happy to see him back there with the rest of his team. There wasn't even any mention of erasing his existence or anything as colorful as the threat against Constantine which was just rude. He could be a threat if he wanted (even if he kind of puffed up like an angry kitten when Clockwork started treating him like he was one of his grandsons) but he doesn't know (can't remember) that all of the Ancients and at least a dozen different pantheons have him on a very short list of people the Ghost King would gladly end the multiverse for after everything his past self/alternate did during the whole Dan problem. In Clockwork's eyes Bart has more than earned a free pass across the wider multiverse.

Cause, the thing is, the rest of the heroes might have died fighting for the world but the Bart from the darker timeline, the one who helped Danny traverse a literal apocalypse and pointed out way too many holes in Vlad's little monologue died saving Danny's life when Dan was trying to mess with the timeline which meant he unknowingly has the Ghost King's blessing and anything and everything on the more darker side of the supernatural can see the enormous 'Do Not Approach' sign that was basically Danny's mark (a necklace, pen, invisible magic whatever or something small he keeps on him without knowing why) claiming Bart as off limits.

Go mess with any other hero if you want, but this speedster, this little guy right here who has Clockwork treating him like a grandson has the Ghost King's blessing, the only blessing he's ever given out, permission to race across the crossroads of Infinity and the protection of a lot of powerful eldritch gods.

#dc x dp #dp x dc #dp x dc prompt #bart allen #danny phantom

[bluebelly-sun-serpentine]

Genuinely terrified of what's going to happen in November. It's hard to believe people are willing to usher in project 2025 in order to wash their hands of the issue. Abstention isn't going to make any of us less complicit in crimes against Gaza, and I don't know, I just think it's a bad idea to give the reigns of power to proud christofascists whose eschatological wet dreams literally require war in Israel/Palestine.

I know vote shaming doesn't work and I don't know what to say. There's no real reset after this election. Our hands aren't going to be clean no matter what. There's not going to be one big blow up where things are bad for a little bit before the dust settles and we somehow start working on fixing things. The religious right are long-term planners with the worst kind of short term goals and they absolutely will continue to stack the courts, secure even more tax breaks for the wealthy, make the world more unsafe for anyone that's not white and male and christian and rich, and I really want to stress this. These people don't care about Gaza. They don't even care about Israel except in the sense that they need it for their disgusting little end-times prophesies. They're a death cult.

I am not a liberal and I have not voted for Biden in a single primary and I really am just as horrified as anyone that we didn't get a primary this go around, but I will vote for him. I wish we had deeply progressive candidates on the ballot who'd make more bold choices but we don't. His handling of this genocide and his refusal to call it what it is is going to be seen not just as the horror that it is but also as one of the biggest fumbles made by an otherwise fairly adept politician accustomed to making bigger moves behind the scenes than while mugging to cameras. But I'm also just barely old enough to remember people voting for Ralph Nader and then Jill Stein in general elections to keep their hands clean and make a point and I'm old enough to remember how ineffectual that turned out to be. I'm trying to imagine a world where Al Gore had been president, had it not come down to some 600 votes and some hanging chads. Had I been old enough to vote in that election I might have held my nose and voted for neoliberal gore despite his involvement in a deeply corrupt administration. And you know what, in hindsight I'm almost 100% sure we'd have been better off as a planet if more people had done that. I don't know what kind of response Gore would have had to 9/11. Maybe it would have been no better – and it's hard not to draw parallels between the stupidity and profound cruelty of the US's response to those attacks and the stupidity and profound cruelty of Israel's response to last October's attacks. Who knows. But I DO think we wouldn't have been careening toward total climate catastrophe quite as quickly as we have been, and I do actually think that one less bad thing is one less bad thing, and when you're interested in material reality harm reduction actually IS important.

[billwidoll]

L᥆᥎ᥱ Bᥲ᥉ᥱd ᥆ᥒ Hᥲtᥱ:

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Rafe Cameron...He was the biggest playboy on the island, and his family was also the richest. Rafe was always a bad boy, he never cared about people's feelings, and he also looked down on the lower class of his Island In other words, the Pougues. But there was someone he loved to ridicule, disturb and despise. That person was you, JJ Maybank's girlfriend, known for being Rafe's biggest enemy

Rafe always thought you were beautiful, captivating and charismatic. But unfortunately, you were on the wrong side, dating the wrong person, and Rafe always knew you would never talk to him because of his fame So he decided to ridicule you, in front of you, to just hear your voice

And now Rafe was in the restaurant where you worked, waiting for you to serve him as a waiter

"Is everything okay, Rafe?" Topper asks, seeing Rafe's impatience

"Okay bro...do you know where that dirty pougue is?" Rafe asks, finally looking at Topper, and Topper lets out a mischievous smile.

"What do you want with that little mouse Rafe? You know she's the girlfriend of the King of Pougues" Topper says and Rafe lets out a mocking laugh

"Now there's this King of Pougues thing? I don't care if she's Maybank's girlfriend" Rafe says, When Rafe turns to the side. He sees you smiling at some customers

"Your muse has arrived" Topper says with a laugh, And Rafe gives Topper a bad look

"Oh! Can someone help me?!" Rafe speaks loudly, getting his attention. You take a deep breath and walk towards them

"Hello, how can I help the knights?" You ask, forcing a huge smile.

"Knights? I thought we were unfortunate in your life" Rafe says teasing you

"Ah Rafe leave her, what time will the blowjob be beautiful?" Topper speaks, and Rafe looks at him a little doubtfully and his blood is feverish at that moment.

"At five in the afternoon, asshole! But a tip, I don't suck soft dicks, much less small ones" you say and that makes Rafe laugh "And jj already makes me very satisfied, but thank you"

You say, leaving the table, and making Rafe angry because you talked about JJ, but that didn't stop him from laughing and being proud of you, for not lowering your head to Topper.

"She's poor, but she's not stupid" Rafe still says with a laugh

Finally, your work day was over, and you were dying to leave. Leaving the back of the restaurant, you come across Rafe leaning against the wall

You saw that he looked at you but you didn't care, and continued walking, until he stopped you.

"Hey, Hey" Rafa says holding your arm and you make him let go abruptly

"what do you want Cameron?" You say crossing your arms. You didn't trust Rafe at all

"I... wanted to apologize for Topper" Rafe speaks a little stuttering, and that makes you confused

"Whatever, I don't care about your excuses" you say, ready to leave, but once Rafe pulls you in "What's your problem?!" You scream

"and that you're... difficult! And I... I'm trying to be nice, right?" Rafe speaks, trying not to get upset, and he runs his hands through his hair nervously.

"And why the hell are you trying to be nice to me?" You still say, amazed by all that

"Because I fucking like you! But you're very brave and you're dating that dirty Pogue" Rafe says, losing all control he had.

"Rafe, are you crazy by chance? Is this some kind of joke?" You say thinking it's all so crazy

"No! Since I saw you on the beach, I can't stop thinking about your smile, your sweet voice and your eyes. I like you" Rafe says, lowering his head nervously

"And why do you treat me so badly since you like me?" You speak a little calmer now

"I knew you would never talk to me, because of my fame. And that your friends don't like me, so belittling you was the only option"

Rafe says this, trying to justify his mistakes to you. For a moment you liked hearing that from Rafe, but it was crazy. None of his friends liked you and none of your friends, I liked him. And your world was totally different, and Rafe had a reputation that he only liked to have sex and not have a TRUE relationship.

"Rafe... having you in my life wouldn't be nice... that wouldn't work" you say feeling sorry for Rafe, who was looking at you as if you were an abandoned puppy

"but why? Just because our worlds are different? I don't care." Rafe says, taking her hand and stroking it.

"I don't just want sex Rafe, I'm a girl to fall in love with and love! I have dreams, and some of them are getting married"

When you said that, you were hoping to scare Rafe. But that didn't happen

"You want to run away? Hmm? We can get married, have kids and be happy" Rafe says in a desperate tone

"Rafe! I... I didn't even date you and you're already thinking about getting married" you say laughing at Rafe's attitude

"I know! This could give us time to get to know each other better, away from all these people! If you want, we can go to Paris!" Rafe speaks and you still laugh

"okay... because we tried to get to know each other right here, hmm? I'll give you three weeks, so you can show me your true passion for me"

You say thinking that Rafe would give up on his proposal

"Okay...in three weeks I'm going to be your boyfriend, and the following week we're going to Paris, right?"

Rafe says, leaving you shocked and intrigued.

"Okay...let's see if you're capable of this" you say, smiling at him now

"What about that shitty boyfriend of yours?" Of course, Rafe goes back to being Rafe

"If you are able to show your feelings to me, I will break up with him" this makes Rafe give a huge smile

"But now I have to go" you say and oddly enough, Rafe gives you a hug, It makes your heart go into your mouth, and your body goes weak

"In three weeks, you will be mine! All mine!" Rafe whispers hoarsely in your ear

Four weeks later :

"Do you enjoy Paris, my love?" Rafe asks you, giving you a slight smile.

"This is a true dream Rafe.." You say, smiling sweetly at him, and finally kissing him brightly and madly out of love.

Rafe was now yours and you were now Rafe's. And it all started, in a Love based on hate.

#dark rafe cameron #drew starkey #drew starkey smut #outerbanks rafe #rafe cameron #rafe cameron blurb #rafe cameron drabble #rafe cameron fanfic #rafe cameron headcanons #rafe cameron oneshot #rafe outer banks #rafe cameron outer banks #rafe smut #rafecore #obx rafe cameron #rafe cameron fanfiction #rafe cameron imagine #rafe cameron moodboard #rafe cameron obx #rafe cameron prompt #rafe cameron smut #rafe cameron thoughts #rafe cameron x female reader #rafe cameron x you #rafe fanfiction #rafe fic #rafe imagine #rafe obx #rafe x reader #rafe x you

[facioleeknow]

Nerds do it better ° Bang Chan

You love nerds, losers and virgins and are always willing to add one to the long list of your conquests. Lucky for you, in your new class, this semester, there's a boy that seems to be made for you ;).

Wc: 1.3k more or less     Genre: college AU, Smut 18+ ONLY

TW: switch chan and reader, experienced reader, inexperienced Chan, dry humping, blowjob, cum eating, public sex, pervy Chan but reader is into it, implied sorority sister reader, shuhua from Idle cameo

The start of a new semester is the best. New classes, new professors, new people but most importantly new boys to add to your list of conquests. Unfortunately being a gender studies major did not aid you in your little mission, there were very few boys in your classes and most of them were insufferable or cute virgins who would never approach you. However what these cute, innocent boys didn't know was that you possessed very specific things that made you irresistible to most men: a good pair of tits, low waisted jeans and a pink lacy thong that peeked out of them. Of course, you also had a very nice personality, a very well functioning brain and ideas of your own but usually men didn't care about that and you didn't care enough to let them see that side of you. Everything you needed was hot steamy toe curling sex and nothing more.

That was why you were currently scurrying the classroom in search of your next prey. And there he was, first row. Black curly hair, white shirt, black pants, shy eyes gazing down at the desk trying not to catch other people's attention. You licked your lips.

“Are you looking for another one of your nerds, y/n?” Shuhua, your sorority sister and desk mate, asked you, a hint of disgust in her tone. She hated men.

“I just found one,” you giggled and collected your bag. The seat next to the “nerd” as Shuhua called him, was free and it had to be yours, even if you had to fight for it.

When your soft hand touched Chan's shoulder he lightly jumped in his seat. His eyes almost popped out of his head when they landed on you. You were hot, really hot.

“Hi my name is Y/N,” you sweetly introduced yourself and extended your hand for him to shake. Not only was your beauty out of this world but your voice was also sweet like honey and your hands were soft and warm. 

Chan swallowed thickly and briefly introduced himself just as the professor walked into the class. He had never been so grateful and relieved to start a lesson but even well after the professor had started talking he couldn't stop thinking about you. Soft hands, wide smile, luscious hair, soft curves. His heartbeat echoed in his ear, his mouth felt dry. He could feel his blood rush to his dick. Fuck he couldn't get hard because of a simple hand shake, but he was unfortunately and he couldn't stop thinking about it.

Chan didn't even realize that the lesson had ended until you softly grazed his thigh with your fingertips. His dick throbbed. He could feel his precum start to stain his boxers, your hand was so close, so so close…

“Chan, would you meet up at the library after? I'm not a great student, I could really use some help.” Lie. You were perfectly capable of acing that exam with minimum effort but he didn't have to know that. 

“Yes, of course,” Chan stuttered in response, he had never felt his face get that warm, he probably looked really red too. What an embarrassment.

You smiled, content, and waved at him goodbye before turning around and skipping to your next class. One single peek at your famous pink thing and Chan was headed for the bathroom as fast as he could before he could cum in his pants.

The library was silent as always, despite it being almost full. The biggest tables were already full with texts and students, full of indiscreet eyes. The last small table at the back of the room was the best choice; it was small enough for you to “accidentally” touch Chan’s arm or leg and most importantly it was behind a whole shelf full of books so you were away from the eyes of your colleagues. 

Chan felt like he was about to explode. The temperature had risen throughout the day and you had ditched your simple cardigan, leaving you in a skimpy tank top that showed your cleavage perfectly. Your boobs looked round and soft, oh how he wanted to pull down your stupid top and suck on your nipples while you stroked his hair until you were mewling in pleasure in front of everybody. The only thing he was focused on was the movement of your chest while you breathed. Up and down, up and down, up and down...The slight touch of your thigh against his as you shifted in your seat was the only thing that brought him back to reality from time to time. Chan closed his eyes, he felt like a total pervert but you were so hot he couldn’t help his thoughts.

 A loud thud snapped him out of his thoughts and made him jump in his seat again. You had closed your books.

“You’re cute when you’re jumpy,” you giggled, it must’ve been a habit of yours, he liked it. Chan couldn’t help but blush at your statement.

“Have you ever slept with a girl?” you looked cute, your head in your hand and cheek squished against your palm, but your words were dirty. His dick started to stir in his jeans once again. He shook his head.

“Hm, has a girl ever touched you?” he shook his head again.

“I can touch you,” you assured him, your hands traveled up his thighs, “ do you want me to touch you,Channie? Do you want to kiss me? I want to. You’re so hot, please let me play with you, baby,” you whined into his ear, your hot breath tickled his neck. His dick had never been harder, copious amounts of precum escaped his swollen red tip.

“Yes, please,” he managed to choke out.

You straddled him in no time, your deliciously soft thigh at his sides. Ha had never felt that good before. When your lips touched his, feverish and wanting, he felt like he was about to explode. You had barely touched him, only given him a little kiss, your tongues had barely met and he was already ready to cum. Your tongue danced with his, warm, wet and inviting. Chan could barely contain his moans of pleasure. When your pussy came in contact with his dick, he knew he was done for. For a moment he thought he had died and gone to heaven but then you started grinding your hips and he knew what he was experiencing was real.

 The friction of your jeans and his on your clit felt like heaven, you were so wet and worked up you could’ve cum only by humping him like an animal, but you knew that he would’ve lasted only a couple of seconds. As soon as that thought crossed your mind, Chan let out a pathetic strangled whimper and cum in his pants like a little boy.

“Did you just cum baby?” your hips stilled on his. Chsn could only nod as his breath was too labored to answer.

“Let me taste.”

Your knees hit the ground with no hesitation while your hands worked at his pants and underwear swiftly. His cock stood proudly in front of you, still hard and covered in sticky cum. He was hung and looked absolutely delicious. Your mouth wrapped around him trying to lick as much cum as you could.

“Oh my god, don’t pull away,” Chan moaned. You didn’t listen and pulled your mouth away from his cock to try and lap all of his essence. Without thinking the boy moved his hand to your head and pushed you onto his dick, making you gag. 

“I said keep sucking.”

“Yes, sir.”

#straykidsland #kpop #reader insert #stray kids #stray kids x reader #stray kids smut #bang chan #bang chan x reader #bang chan smut #college au #stray kids college au #bang chan college au #kpop reader insert #kpop smut

[emilyprentissluvr]

Until Next Time (Don't Blame Me: Chapter 3)

Summary: Emily knew it was wrong. She knew you were the most dangerous woman the BAU had ever seen. Yet, she couldn't seem to stay away from you.

Chapter 1, Chapter 2

Warnings: Typical Criminal Minds stuff

Words: 2.9k

EMILY PULLED Y/n closer so that her back was flushed to the agent's front. "You're bluffing," Emily scoffed as she eyed the woman. She knew from Y/n's profile that she didn't kill people whom she deemed innocent. So there was no way she would blow up a bar full of a hundred people.

"Are you really willing to take that risk?" Y/n smiled sweetly and it took the brunette less than a second to lead Y/n out of the bathroom and pull the fire alarm.

The alarm started blaring and people started making their way out of the bar. Emily looked at the detonator again and saw it was now at a minute. She didn't like how slowly the crowd was moving so she yelled at the top of her lungs, "Everybody out! It's a real fire!" And luckily, people started moving much faster.

"What's going on?" Derek said as he ran toward the women, ignoring Y/n's smug smile and focusing on Emily. He'd had his eye trained on the bathroom door, waiting for them to come out. 

"She said there's a bomb," Emily said as she kept her eyes on the crowd, wanting to ensure everyone got out. 

"Where?" Derek said as he eyed Y/n, who just shrugged playfully.

"I don't know and I don't think we have time to find out," Emily said as she showed Derek the detonator which was now counting down from 45 seconds. 

"Get her out of here and I'll make sure everyone else is out," Derek stated leaving no room for argument. 

Emily nodded and pulled Y/n out to a less crowded exit. "You know, as much fun as this is, could you loosen your grip a bit?" Y/n pouted over her shoulder at the brunette.

Emily scoffed as she walked the two of them further away from the building. She saw Hotch and JJ driving toward them in their SUV before quickly hopping out and jogging towards the women. 

"Mm, the blonde is pretty," Y/n noted and Emily just gritted her teeth. 

"What? Did I hit a nerve?" Y/n teased and the brunette ignored her as she walked them toward the unit chief.

"What happened?" Hotch asked as he pulled out his cuffs and handed them to Emily.

"She said she put a bomb in there," Emily said as she quickly cuffed Y/n's hands behind her back.  "Derek's getting everyone out but I'm pretty sure she's bluffing," The brunette continued as she tightened the handcuffs even more. 

"She is right here," Y/n said, causing everyone to turn toward her. "And she would appreciate it if you loosened the cuffs a bit." Y/n continued as she wiggled her hands from behind her.

"Can you focus on something other than yourself for two goddam seconds and tell us if the bomb is real or not?!" Emily growled, her patience for Y/n's antics dwindling more and more.

"That's kind of a lot to ask of a psychopath, don't you think?" Y/n pouted as she turned her head over her shoulder to look at the brunette. "That's what you guys profiled me as, right? A high-functioning psychopath?"

"You won't be so high functioning when you spend the rest of your life in prison." Emily retorted which only earned a laugh from the younger woman, "We'll see about that."

"Prentiss," Hotch interrupted, not liking how much Emily was getting riled up. "The detonator." He said as he held out his hand for the agent to give to him. Emily begrudgingly gave it to the man and watched as his eyebrows rose slightly.

"What is it?" JJ asked as she leaned closer, trying to see whatever Hotch had discovered.

"Well, she is bluffing," Hotch said as he turned the device around and showed that the timer had already run out and nothing had happened, "And this isn't a detonator, It's a remote control for a toy car. Jack has one of these things." The unit chief pointed out quietly, not wanting to make Emily even more mad.

"You're kidding me?!" Emily scoffed as she turned to face Y/n who had the biggest smile on her face, "What? I bought it from the toy store before I came. Like I said before, it's fun to rile you up." 

"You think this is funny?! " Emily said lividly, hating how Y/n was getting under her skin. 

"No, of course not. I think it's hilarious," Y/n said licking her lips.

"We're done here," Hotch said calmly, already sensing how Emily was on the verge of blowing up. "Take her to the SUV." The unit chief continued and Emily nodded, not having to be told twice. She practically dragged Y/n the ten feet of the car before throwing open the door. 

"This was fun, darling! Next time we'll have to use handcuffs in a different context if you know what I mean." Y/n said brashly with a wink as Emily forced her into the car and connected the cuffs to the seat.

"There will be no next time." Emily gritted out and Y/n smiled innocently, "We'll see about that, Agent Prentiss."

The brunette slammed the door shut and walked toward JJ and Hotch, not wanting to spend another second in the younger woman's company. 

"You okay?" Hotch asked and Emily blew out a breath, "Yeah, she's just- a lot."

"Well, at least it's over now," JJ said as she gave her friend a reassuring pat on the shoulder. Emily nodded as she turned to look at Y/n who was still looking at her with a smile on her face. Something felt wrong but Emily couldn't put her finger on it. 

"Yeah, you're right," Emily said, shaking the worries out of her mind, "I'm not riding back with her though." She said seriously to her boss.

"Don't worry, I'll make Derek do it." The unit chief said and Emily sighed with relief. She was done with Y/n. She could forget all about today. Well, maybe not forget about it, but at least compartmentalize it until it wasn't a big deal.

●・○・●・○・●・○・●・○・●

"Would you like to play a game, Agent Morgan?" Y/n asked as she stared at the bald man next to her. One of the local Police officers was driving but Derek had insisted on sitting in the back seat next to the woman, not wanting to take his eyes off of her for a second. 

"No," Derek replied shortly, trying to ignore the headache that had been blooming in his temple since leaving the bar.

Y/n sighed dramatically, "Oh come on, It'll be fun!"

"No," Derek said again and the woman just shook her head, "Twenty questions. You ask me whatever you want and I'll answer with the complete truth."

"Really?" Derek asked and Y/n nodded her head, "As long as you answer my questions. No lying."

Derek thought the idea over. Realistically he knew there was no harm, in fact, he could probably get more answers out of Y/n right now than in an interrogation room. "Fine. But I'm asking a question first," Derek said and Y/n nodded with a smile, happy that the agent was playing along. 

"What's your full name?" Derek asked and Y/n sighed boredly, "Y/n Y/l/n. Although I guarantee  you won't get far with it."

"What does that mean-"

"Ah ah. Mine turn." Y/n tutted, "Is there anything going on between Emily and the blonde?" 

Derek blinked slowly, "That's seriously the question you're asking me?"

"Yes," Y/n said as she eyed the man with a frown. Derek rolled his eyes but answered honestly, "No. Nothing is going on between Emily and JJ."

A smile touched Y/n's lips that Derek didn't like the looks of but he decided to ignore it for now. 

"What was the name of your first victim?" The agent asked. Four years ago when he first worked the case the team knew that the first victim they found couldn't have been Y/n's first victim. The crime scene was organized and perfectly executed so it was obvious that Y/n worked up to it. 

"Alex Painter" Y/n answered and to an untrained eye, it looked as if the woman wasn't bothered. But Derek could see through her, could see the way Y/n's eyes narrowed slightly and how she bit the inside of her cheek. The agent wanted to ask more but he could tell that Y/n wasn't going to answer. 

"My turn! What's Emily's favorite flower?" Y/n said, seemingly snapping out of whatever funk she was put in by the question.

 Derek paused for a moment his stomach feeling uneasy. However, he couldn't tell if it was because all the questions were focused on Emily or because his headache was starting to make him feel nauseous. 

"Chrysanthemum's." He said, remembering when Emily pointed them out to him on a case one time.

"You choose to shoot your victims in the head, why?" Derek asked, turning the conversation back to Y/n. This had been a question Rossi brought up this morning. The use of a gun made the kills seem impersonal but the brand of the angel wings did the complete opposite. 

"It's efficient and fast. I don't see a point in prolonging the inevitable. The men I kill deserved what they had coming to them." She said, her voice void of any emotion and it almost sent a shiver down the agent's spine.  

"My turn again! What's Emily's favorite food?" Y/n asked, her emotions suddenly flipping back on.

"Why do you want to know that?" Derek asked and Y/n frowned, "Answer my question or I'm done talking."

The agent sighed, he knew Y/n wasn't bluffing so he answered cautiously, "She loves Thai food."

Y/n smiled as her tongue darted out to wet her bottom lip, "Interesting," The woman said and Derek immediately wanted to change the topic, "Why did you move back to the States?" He asked and Y/n sighed, "It was for work. I wasn't too keen on the idea of moving back but I can't deny how much fun I'm having."

"Fun you've had," Derek corrected, blinking slowly as his vision became fuzzy. 

"Sure," Y/n laughed hysterically as she fell over and Derek had no idea what was going on. His mind felt so slow as he tried to comprehend the scene in front of him. His words weren't meant to be funny so he was extremely confused as he watched the woman practically fold over with laughter.

That was until he looked down and noticed the cuffs were no longer secured around Y/n's wrist. Before he had time to react Y/n had quickly pulled the gun from his ankle holster and shot the cop driving the car in the hand.

The cop screamed in pain as his hands came off the steering wheel, causing the car to swerve into a ditch on the side of the road. Luckily they were only going about 25 miles per hour so when they hit a tree Derek and Y/n barely lurched forward. Derek, uncharacteristically, had been frozen since the moment he heard the gunshot. His head was pounding and his eyes were unfocused as he stared at the woman in front of him.

"I really am sorry about this, Derek." Y/n sighed as she toyed with the gun in her hand. The agent tried to reach toward her but the haze in his eyes was getting worse. "What....did.....you....d-do?" Derek muttered.

"Nothing a bandaid won't fix. And trust me, women find scars very sexy." Y/n said, and before Derek even had time to react he felt the gun slam right into his temple. The last thing he remembered was trying to reach out for Y/n as she climbed out of the car before his vision went black.

●・○・●・○・●・○・●・○・●

Emily's breath fogged the window as stared into the night from the back seat of the SUV. She had the urge to trace her bottom lip, the same ones Y/n had kissed less than an hour ago, but she didn't let herself. She hated how that moment kept replaying in her mind. Hated how she had enjoyed it, even if it was for a sliver of a second.

"You okay back there, Em?" JJ asked as she turned around from the passenger seat. The blonde had been worried about her friend since she sat in the car. 

"Yeah, just tired," Emily said with a small smile that even she knew was unconvincing. Although her words were the truth, she had never been tempted to drown a bottle of wine and crash right into bed.

"Why don't you take the day off tomorrow," Hotch suggested from the driver's seat.

"I'm fine." Emily rolled her eyes, not liking the attention on her.

"Prentiss that wasn't a request-" Hotch started before he was interrupted by the police intercom on the dashboard of the SUV.

"I need backup and medical on 24th Street immediately! We have an agent down and the suspect is on the run! I repeat the suspect is on the run!" A scratchy voice from the device called out.

Emily's eyes widened as she heard the dispatcher repeat it all over again. 

"Oh my god. You don't think that's..." JJ trailed off, already knowing the answer.

Hotch immediately turned his sirens on and hit the gas. Luckily they were only a minute away but the drive felt like hours before they saw the car off the side of the road.

Emily got out of the car before Hotch could even put it in park, and raced to the site of the crash. She saw that the paramedics leading the cop with the shot hand to the ambulance but no sign of Y/n.  She looked behind the car and into the miles of woods that Y/n could be in. Her first instinct was to run in there and find her until she heard a grunt of pain from the car. Her eyes widened when she realized she recognized that sound very well. 

"Derek?!" Emily yelled as she ran closer and was relieved to find him sitting in the car with an icepack on his forehead. The paramedics had tried to get him to the ambulance but he had refused until he could tell the team exactly what happened. 

"Jesus Prentiss, lower your voice." He winced and the brunette immediately apologized but was glad to see that he was still pretty much the same. 

"What happened?" Hotch asked as he walked up from behind Emily.

"She was asking me a bunch of questions and then all of a sudden my vision started going blurry. Next thing I know she's shooting Detective Watson in the hand and I'm getting knocked out with my own Glock." Derek says, still evidently out of it in a way that concerns all three agents who are listening to him.

"You need to get checked out by the medics," Hotch said immediately and Derek shook his head, which only made the pain worse, "Hotch, I'm fine-"

"Derek you were obviously drugged. So you will get checked by the medics. I'm not negotiating." Hotch, said before he yelled for the medics. Two men immediately rushed over to Derek's annoyance but he was more at least he was more cooperative. Hotch immediately went into Unit Chief mode and took control of the scene. He had Emily and JJ look over the car for details while he got in touch with the Bureau about putting out an APB for Y/n.

Emily walked to the opposite side of the car. The door was still open from when Y/n had escaped and the cuffs were opened and on the ground. The brunette shook her head as she imagined the smug look on Y/n's face the last time she had seen her, "I should have seen this coming."

"This isn't your fault," JJ said slowly, slightly confused as to why the brunette was taking this so hard.

"I knew something was wrong but I didn't say anything. Maybe if I had, Derek wouldn't have gotten hurt and Y/n wouldn't have gotten away-" Emily started before the blonde cut her off, "No one could have predicted this. Not even you."

Emily bit the inside of her cheek as she turned to look at the forest behind her. The breeze was making the limbs of the tree sway and it felt as if the unknown was taunting her. "She's been two steps ahead of us this whole time," The brunette said as she turned back to JJ. "And we just let her get away."

"Emily-" JJ started but the brunette was already walking away, not wanting to look at the car or the empty handcuffs for another second. She walked toward Derek who was fighting with the medics. "I don't need to go to the hospital!" Derek grumbled as the paramedic walked away with an annoyed look on his face. When Emily was close she shot the paramedic an apologetic look before taking a seat next to her partner. 

"Do they know what she drugged you with?" The brunette asked and Derek shook his head, "They won't know without further testing but they said it didn't seem too serious. My only concern is that I don't even know when she did it. Or how."

"That does seem to be the question of the day. How the hell did she pull all of that off?" Emily muttered and Derek shrugged, "I don't know, but I did get some information out of her."

"Anything useful?"

"Yeah, well more concerning than anything."

"What does that mean?" Emily asked with a frown.

"It means that not only do we have a serial killer on the loose. But we have one that's obsessed with you, Prentiss." Derek said sympathetically and Emily just stared straight forward into the woods, imagining Y/n leaning against one of the trees and giving her a cocky wink.

"Lovely," Emily muttered. 

#emily prentiss #emily prentiss x reader #criminal minds #jennifer jareau #derek morgan #emily prentiss x female reader #emily prentiss fanfiction #emily prentiss x y/n #emily prentiss x you #aaron hotchner #spencer reid #david rossi

[jaegermonstrous]

So I've got Thoughts on Worf. Disclaimer, these are all heavily informed by own experiences and background, ymmv. Also disclaimer, I haven't gotten around to watching PIC yet. It's on my list, but I'm not there yet. But anyway.

So, Worf in TNG is pretty much our biggest exposure to the Klingon culture so far, and he's pretty consistent with the other Klingons we see. He's a big and tough warrior guy with the Stoic Warrior Thing going on. He's constantly getting his ass handed to him to show the audience the bad guys of the week are Serious Business. He's a pretty awful father, but we have no reason to believe other Klingons are much better. He's apparently got enough of a soft/personable side that he dates Deanna Troi for a bit [no shade to the actors here, but the logic behind that pairing has never worked for me, or at least the writers never did enough legwork to make it believable to my ace and autistic self]. But mostly, he's a Big Stoic Warrior Man from a culture of Big Stoic Warrior Men.

But Worf in DS9 is much less isolated from other Klingons, and it's here where - to me - he becomes incredibly interesting as an example of someone trying to reconnect with their heritage as an adult, especially someone who's either felt pressured to perform their culture "correctly" to an outsider [Federation] standard, or who's never had significant contact with the huge diversity of their culture and kind of internalized the idea that "this is how you perform my culture correctly" from a very limited amount of sources, and therefore become kind of an asshole about it when people [other Klingons] don't do or be as you expect them to.

From the doylist perspective we can just say "well, the DS9 writers really diversified the Klingons," but I find the watsonian perspective far more interesting; here you have Worf, the first and [so far] only Klingon serving in Starfleet, who was removed from his culture as a young child and raised by Humans [no shade to the Rozhenkos here, I think they did their best to raise Worf with an awareness of his origins]. He's been aware most of his life of being the only Klingon in a room full of Humans and other Federation species, most of whom have Expectations of what Meeting A Real Klingon would be like. So Worf, with his mostly second-hand knowledge of Klingon culture and a huge wall of Expectations surrounding him at every turn, becomes what he thinks of as The Ideal Klingon. He's stoic, he's gruff, he barely ever cracks a smile, and when you put him in the room with a bunch of diverse DS9 Klingons, he comes across as a caricature.

Let's look at some of the DS9 Klingons, and I think you'll see what I mean.

First up - Kaga, the Klingon chef. I personally love Kaga, and I wish we had gotten to see more of him. He's our first real indicator that Klingons in DS9 are Built Different. He's cheerful, he doesn't dress in a warrior's armor, he plays that Klingon accordion thing and sings to his patrons. He's a glimpse of what Klingons outside the military are probably like. I love that the DS9 writers did this, showcasing that Klingons [like so many of the non-Humans we get in DS9] are just people.

Next, we have Kor, the Dahar Master. Again, I adore Kor. In some ways he's a throwback to TOS Klingons, who were conniving, and mocking, and just generally Untrustworthy and would 100% stab you in the back if they thought it would get them what they wanted. But he's also a fantastic example of a DS9 Klingon. Kor is old, and tired, and kind of a drunk, and beginning to lose touch with his abilities and reality. But he's also clever, and cunning, and you can really see the intelligence and the ferocity that made him so formidable to Kirk and the TOS crew back in the day. And he's also charming and kind of a sweetheart, and he genuinely loves Dax like family. He's well-rounded in a way we don't get to see Worf be for a while. And even when we contrast Kor with Kang and Koloth, two other Klingons from the same era who align more with the TNG Stoic Warrior Man stereotype, you can see where their characters are much fuller. They have a history and a familiarity with each other and with Dax that really shines through. I mean, they swore blood oaths with a Trill. Yeah, Dax had to work really hard to be accepted by the Klingons, but once Curzon crossed that line, Kang, Koloth, and Kor were ride or die for Dax.

Third - General Martok. Martok is IMO the best foil to Worf, and sort of an example of who Worf might be someday [again, I haven't seen Worf in PIC yet]. And I really love Martok as someone who's very like Worf in a lot of ways, but also highlights how Worf has really made himself into a caricature of what Being A Klingon is all about. Yeah, Martok is big and tough and stoic, but you also see in the prison camp and later how that's not all of what Martok is. He has faith in and respect for his fellow prisoners in the camp, even the Romulans [who you'd think would be the last people a Klingon would ever trust or respect]. He's a Wife Guy, which I just adore. He's got a sharp sense of humor, he's got trauma from being held as a prisoner of the Dominion for so long, he's friends with Local Twink Julian Bashir.

Martok is also the one who talks Worf down from being such a hardline asshole. When Alexander comes aboard the Rotarran, it's Martok who helps them start to build a better relationship. When it looks like the Worf-Dax wedding is off, it's Martok who encourages Worf to soften his stance [yes, it's also implied Dax is pressured into apologizing to Sirella, but that's another post for another day]. Martok is the example of being a Stoic Warrior Man while also being a rounded person.

This isn't to say Worf doesn't grow on his own, but a lot of his growth happens in DS9 in ways that [to me] read as someone who's really only engaged in their culture in a vacuum or in an abstract way, and now he's hanging out with other Klingons, he's Making Friends with other Klingons, and he has the space [and is actively encouraged by other Klingon characters] to soften his stance and be a little more rounded.

I could also talk about Dax here, and her interactions with Klingon culture and how those affect Worf, but I think I'm done for now.

#ds9 #star trek #star trek ds9 #star trek tng #star trek tos #i did not realize i had this many klingon thoughts #star trek klingons #klingons #worf son of mogh #general martok #kor dahar master #kaga the chef

[corneliaavenue]

What is Billie saying about Taylor?

There have been a lot of little things over the years

In 2020, when Taylor won the Billboard Woman of the Decade, she talked about all of the new up and coming women in the industry and specifically highlighted Billie because she was winning Woman of the Year that year. First thing Billie says when its her turn, "Yalls speeches were long as fuck!" (note, Taylor's speech was 15 minutes and she does go on to talk nice about Taylor later in her speech)

In 2022, Damon Albarn shaded Taylor saying she didn't write all of her music while simultaneously cheering on Billie and Finneas for writing all of their music. Taylor clapped back in a tweet. Billie then invites Damon out later that year for her Coachella set, where Finneas was overheard saying "Taylor Swift is going to sue us"

In March of this year, Billie talks to Billboard about the act of releasing multiple variants and how wasteful it is. "We live in this day and age where, for some reason, it’s very important to some artists to make all sorts of different vinyl and packaging … which ups the sales and ups the numbers and gets them more money and gets them more" and "some of the biggest artists in the world making f–king 40 different vinyl packages that have a different unique thing just to get you to keep buying more. It’s so wasteful, and it’s irritating to me that we’re still at a point where you care that much about your numbers and you care that much about making money"

Billie's manager has been liking and even retweeting several Taylor hate tweets.

Billie talked about albums being too long on Zane Lowe, but she was talking about her previous album Happier Than Ever when discussing it, so I will only side eye. "I think for that one we just didn’t put that much into it. That’s why there’s 16 songs. Nobody needs that many songs"

Last night, Billie's interview with Stationhead came out where she said that "Doing a 3 hour show.. That's literally psychotic. Nobody wants that. You guys don't want that. I don't want that. I don't even want that as a fan. Even my favorite artists I'm not trying to hear them for 3 hours. That's far too long.

Billie now has multiple versions of her album to purchase including paint splattered, discounted on iTunes to $5, and physical copies discounted at Targets for somehone who thinks its wasteful to make multiple different vinyl packages and it is disingenuous to up her sales and numbers

#let me know if i missed anything

[flower-boi16]

What exactly is the issue that most of the crits have with Vaggie being a fallen angel? This is isn’t a diss on crits, I’m just confused

I think it's because most of them just don't like the idea. There's this whole thing going around where Viv apperently took that idea of Vaggie being a fallen angel from a fan theory she saw.

To me I think the twist could've worked but it's just very poorly executed. The biggest problem with the twist to me is how Vaggie being a fallen angel barely feels like it matters to her as a character. Vaggie being a soilder in the angel's army doesn't really feel like it affects her that much if at all, we don't get to know what being an exterminator is like, how the way she was raised affected her (assuming exorcists are heaven-borns as Adam implies in episode 6 when he says that he "names" them), or anything like that.

There just doesn't seem to be much of a developed backstory here, the reveal is pretty rushed. It doesn't really add anything to Vaggie as a character or change anything about her, removing it changes nothing about her character in the slightest. The only affect Vaggie being a fallen angel has is that it's there to create drama between Charlie and Vaggie that gets resolved in one episode.

That's pretty much it. I'm making a rewrite for Vaggie and I want to try and give her a more developed backstory, a women rasied in a military army, and I want to try and explore how that enviornment affected her, which would give her real depth beyond being "Charlie's girlfriend". So...stay tuned for that (when I eventually finish that rewrite lmao).

#vivziepop critical #hazbin hotel critical #vivziepop criticism #hazbin hotel criticism

[resowrites]

Special Brew - oneshot.

Summary: Henry’s interview gets gatecrashed…

Pairings: AU!Henry Cavill x Reader/Wife!OC, Interviewer

Warnings: fluff, banter/British humour, fake interview, language, dialogue heavy, nondescript reader/OC body type/appearance, hastily written/lightly proofread.

WC: 2221

A/N: Hi folks I know it’s been a while, work’s nuts these days. This is very rushed and was meant to be longer (I wanted to base it on something I’d written previously) but for the sake of just getting something uploaded I decided to post as is. Sorry I can’t post regularly anymore but I hope you enjoy all the same - R x

Remember, this is pure fiction (as in completely made up), and not in any way meant to reflect reality. My work must not be copied, reposted, or translated elsewhere. Gifs/pics not my own. Thanks for visiting!

Special Brew - oneshot.

The following is an excerpt from an article that can be read in full here.

— It's at about the halfway mark in my interview with the 41-year-old Hollywood actor, Henry Cavill, when I notice his attention is caught by something offscreen. 

"Where did you get that?" I think I hear 'the fridge, you dickhead,' in reply. He grins. But instead of resuming our discussion about his upcoming role in the rebooted 80's classic, Highlander, he starts gesturing for someone to join him. It fails. So seconds later his partner is pulled onto his lap despite some very loud protestations. He tells her it's her fault for taking his last tin of lager. She tells him she needs it more. What then follows is an almost a four-and-a-half minute squabble - yes I actually timed it - which ends with Henry relinquishing the can on the proviso that if he has to be interviewed, she does as well. I don't take offense but soon wondered if that was premature: 

"Who's interviewing you? The Telegraph?"

"No, The Guardian--"

"Wouldn't the Telegraph be more interested?" He gestures in my direction.

"Well, I assume Mark is all the same!"

"And how long have you been keeping this poor bastard?"

"We've not even been chatting half an hour!" 

"Oh… have you got a second question for him?" I smile. The 35-year-old financier first met the actor in 2015 and they were rumoured to have married in 2022. Not that either of them, his publicist, or even various social media accounts provide much in the way of confirmation. This seems to stem more from a desire for privacy where possible than anything else. Though it must be said, at first glance they make for an incongruous pair. She catches me peering at her still towel-wrapped hair, Celtic jersey, and joggers combo and wastes no time striking first:

"That's a nice shirt--"

"Don't be cheeky, just 'cos you could have made more of an effort--"

"It's my day off! At least I don't look like an undercover policeman." Is she referring to Henry or myself?

"I don't know, stand up," I laugh but he just rolls his eyes. "Has he apologised for Aryglle yet? To be fair that was actually my fault, I wanted a new kitchen." This lays the ground for what is arguably one of the most chaotic interviews I've experienced in a while.

"Do you see what I mean, Mark? It's not that she wouldn't be media trained, it's that she couldn't." Now she rolls her eyes.

"See, he thinks he's being slick by making me look bad--"

"I'm the one who does that?!"

"So he looks better by comparison--"

"Is that right? And what was wrong with Aryglle?!"

"Nothing! It's the best thing you've ever done. Even if you didn't mean for it to be." She coughs to try and cover a laugh. I ask for her thoughts on his most recent box office offering (Guy Ritchie's spy action comedy, The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare) but for a split second, the title escapes me.

"You mean The Manly Ministry of Something?" Henry tuts and grabs back the can. I dare to question if she has a low opinion of the profession in general. "No, it's more to do with the actors themselves." How so? "Well, considering they're usually the biggest gobshites you'd think it'd be great craic hanging out with them--" he quickly interjects.

"Who are you calling a gobshite?!"

'What do you mean?"

"You know fine well what I mean!" Henry turns back towards me and continues. "Even her own mother took me aside a couple of weeks after we started dating to try and warn me--"

"She never! What did she say?"

"Do you really want to discuss that right now?!" It can't be that bad then, I respond. He shakes his head, despairingly. "Oh no, just that she once walked on stage at a school assembly and instead of graciously accepting an award, pretended to trip so she could drag every single trophy off the display table!"

"… Can you tell he went to a private school?" I almost spit my drink out.   

"What do you mean?"

"Do you not realise how tame that sounds?!"

"But that was just the first month you were there!"

"Then I deserved an award--"

"Hang on, she also told me that when you had an after-school detention on your birthday, you climbed out the window of the room you were being supervised in--"

"Normally I'd just get on the bus and go home so that time they gave me a personal escort--"

"And then refused to come down from the roof unless they gave her a birthday cake!" Laughter rings out between our two screens. "In the end, they had to call the fire brigade and she became the reason why their school couldn't properly open their windows any more--"

"I also got a ride home in a fire engine so, hands down one of my best birthdays." Henry sighs. I wonder aloud how this contrasts with his own experiences of school. 

"Er, I mean I was a bit of a goody-two-shoes, so I felt a bit intimidated by that sort of thing." 

"He still is." He now chokes on his drink. Does this mean they wouldn't have crossed paths as kids?

"Nah, she'd have bullied me then as well." They both laugh. So she hasn't mellowed at all in the intervening years?

"I would say I have, yeah… you do as you get older." Henry's eyebrows hit the ceiling.

"Oh right, so I just hallucinated that night at the Bafta’s then?" She clears her throat and takes a large swig from the can. Is this why she doesn't typically attend red carpets with him?

"Ugh, I'd rather shit in my hands and clap--"

"That and the fact you're a fucking liability!" She shrugs as he explains. "A few years ago, I made the mistake of dragging her along to the after-party--"

"Well, that explains why I didn't fucking remember. Why did I have to come? You didn't win anything you were just presenting--"

"Oh fuck off! I even promised to take her on holiday for a couple of weeks if she at least tried to behave herself--"

"'Cos that's a good incentive--"

"And Jesus Christ, never again. If I wasn't blackballed in this industry before, I was that fucking night--"

"No, it's 'cos you won't take acting lessons." Henry smirks and tries to cover her mouth this time.

"At least I didn't go up to a circle containing Judi Dench, Helen Mirren--"

"Look at him dropping names! And it's Dame Judi…"

"And last but not least, the Meryl Streep--"

"You know, of Mama Mia…" A laugh escapes me before I can stop it. 

“Only to ask them where their cauldron was!" 

"But that's the great thing about being a nobody, you can say whatever want--"

"You're not a nobody--"

"No, I'm your plus one…" They howl with laughter. "The best thing is to underdress slightly as well so they think you're staff, the reactions are even better." And what was the response? "None of them heard me." He snorts.

"Judi just burst out laughing--"

"Judi! Like they're friends! Yeah, well she saw us arrive together so I think she was onto me."

"Luckily she's got a robust sense of humour…"

"Not like that other one. Oh, what's his name? You know… the one that says he'd rather be making shoes?" Sir Daniel Day-Lewis?

"Yeah, she asked him if he wanted her to go look for his top hat." I can feel my own jaw drop.

"That's how he reacted! Oh God, I'd give my left tit to relive it…" I ask where Henry is when these interactions go down. "Usually trying to find the nearest exit--"

"Is it any wonder!" 

"But we were only there twenty minutes--" 

"And he wasn't even the first Daniel you managed to piss off!" And who was that?

"Dan Snow." The broadcaster? Henry glances heavenward, exasperated.

"No, Jon Snow - and she means Kit Harrington. She got talking to him and somehow things managed to go south even quicker than usual." I can see how referring to him instead as the 50-year-old historian might have that effect. "No, it wasn't that, it was when he asked whether she was enjoying Game of Thrones--"

"Which is presumptuous isn't it?" For once even I'm at a loss for words. 

"And so she asked him if that's the show with dragons and when he said 'yes,'" he starts cracking up, "she went 'then, no.'" I don't think I've ever seen a man look so crestfallen - not even when you accosted Sam." Mr. Rockwell? I'm assuming that took place while Henry was still on the Argylle press tour?

"Oh yeah that was a gas, I waited until we were a bit better acquainted--"

"So the poor sod had his guard down--"

"And on the last day, I asked if he'd sign a picture for me. I think he assumed it was for a friend or something so he wasn't expecting me to thank him for gifting Henry his picture to put above the toilet--"

"What's worse is that it was that still from The Green Mile, you know? Literally, the first one that pops up on Google!" This anecdote puts me in mind of a similar story I heard on the grapevine during the first season of Netflix's The Witcher. Against my better judgment, I ask him if knows what I'm talking about and immediately his eyes flash in recognition.  

"Yeah, and it pains me to say that's also true."

"What is?"

"Your stunt at the Witcher premiere…" For a moment she looks genuinely confused. "Don't pretend you can't remember!"

"Remember what? I wasn't even there!"

"And even that didn't spare me!" 

"Oh I can't fucking win Mark, all I did was try and bring a smile to his face 'cos I knew he was sad about me having to work that night--"

"So naturally you had an 8x10 still printed of me with Orlando Bloom's head (as Legolas), photoshopped on top? Which, by the way, you could have just messaged me. But what did you do instead? You made dozens of copies and had my bodyguard hand them out to fans for me to sign." She waits for a beat.

"But how long did it take for you to notice?" Gentle reader, when I tell you this is one of only a handful of occasions I've ever laughed so hard in an interview, it's because I want you to know how rare that's actually been over a 35-year career in entertainment journalism. Still, I imagine that if she was brazen enough to taunt some of Hollywood's most influential stars, far worse shots have since been fired.

"Oh yeah, why don't you tell Mark how you recently mouthed off to Aaron Taylor Johnson?" Even she begins to look sheepish. 

"Yeah, but I was only trying to make conversation." Henry's head falls into his hand. She snickers. What on earth happened? "Honestly, nothing. I just said I hoped he really was being considered for Bond ‘cos he looks great in a suit." I hardly know how to respond. "Now that I think about it, he probably just thought I got you two mixed up--"

"Stop it right now!"

"What? You bought me in on this interview!" This of course is true and seems to serve a more serious purpose the longer our conversation continues. That he adores her is plain - his eyes never leave her. But it's the fact she can keep making him laugh, even under the scrutiny of being interviewed, that seems to make all the difference. Is that the key to the success of their relationship? "Well, that and the fact he's gone for six months out of any twelve--"

"So all the messages saying you miss me is just lip service?"

"Oh alright, it's cos he's got a huge… heart. Almost as big as his bank balance." Henry's legs are suddenly thrown in the air. At first, it seems he lost his balance, but judging from how quickly he then chases her from the room, I assume it was she who pulled the lever on his office chair that sent him hurtling to the floor. 

A couple of days later, I received a brief email from her which apologised for them both having 'christened more than a couple of ships' that day and explained how she was grateful that even though she 'had a lot of baggage' before they met, Henry refused to give up on her. She signed off with the following; 'His biggest problem is his limited self-belief. But seriously, he's admired because, in a professional and personal life full of arseholes, he's still, as Virginia Woolf said of her husband right before she died by suicide, 'entirely patient and incredibly good'. I'll never be drunk enough to say that to his face so I've cc'd him in.' I double-checked and saw that she had indeed emailed him as well. It's an oddly moving, albeit characteristically funny postscript and one that underlines her devotion to him no matter what. We should all be so lucky.

The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare is on Amazon Prime Video.

To be updated on when I post please follow @resowrites and turn on post notifications.

@fanfictionaddiction99 @luclittlepond @caffeinatedfestivalsheep @summersong69 @ushijimbo @livesinfantasyland @jackjanira @thearcana-moonlight

#henry cavill #henry cavill fandom #henry cavill fanfiction #henry cavill imagine #henry cavill x reader

[malarkgirlypop]

Easy Men Pranksters

How easy company men prank

Richard Winters:

I feel like he would do the most unnoticeable prank, like move an item one inch to the side. I'm sure he would think it was funny, he would've seen someone do it on facebook reels lmao. He tries it on Nix, who does not notice. But every time Nix walks into the room, Dick has a good chuckle to himself, knowing what he did.

Lewis Nixon:

He would throw a party and say he put out spiked punch. Turns out is wasn't spiked punch, just normal juice and fruit. He just wanted to weed out the fake bitches who pretend to get drunk. But that's not the true reason he did the prank. No way is he sharing his collection of alcohol, if you want to get drunk BYO.

Harry Welsh:

I think he would try to prank Lew and Dick. When they are hanging out without him, he calls the house and asks if the fridge is running. But jokes on him, he didn't turn off caller ID. "Harry, please stop calling the house. If you want to come over, just come over." Tries to pretend it wasn't him that called. He tried to convince Kitty to prank call the house so he doesn't look suspicious, but again forgot to turn off caller ID and it's his phone she has.

Ronald Speirs:

Leaves a horse head in the persons bed. Doesn't know the difference between a death threat and a prank.

"You should've seen his face."

"Speirs he had a heart attack."

"Yeah, ahaha, classic."

Please don't let this man prank.

Carwood Lipton:

The most harmless prankster. Like you don't get the prank. He has to explain it.

"Come over to the window and look at all these deer!"

"Where?"

"Got you!!"

"What?"

"You've been punked son!"

"I'm confused."

"There were never deer!!"

Oh Lip no. That's so bad. BOOOOO ahahah.

George Luz:

Loves getting pranked more than pranking. But he always is trying to get people to prank him, so he never get tricked. 100% would sneak into your house and replace all of your family photos with just pictures of himself. He has especially gone to JCpenney to get those hilarious awkward family photos, but it's all just him duplicated. It's a family of Luz's!

Joe Toye:

He's a mean prankster. One of those guys who has fake bugs and insects and tricks you into looking at what's in his hands. Also will hide around the house in the dark just to scare you. You're so used to it, that when you come home you have to scope out each room, only to find he actually went out for a drink and you're home alone. You call him and tell him what you have just done for the past hour and he thinks it's the funniest thing he has ever heard. Will definitely brag about it to the boys.

Bill Guarnere:

Classic prankster. Cling wrap on the toilet, cling wrap in the door way, putting everything in jello, wrapping the room in tinfoil. Causes the most mayhem and the biggest clean ups. He spends more time on the prank than the reaction is worth. Spent a whole night putting post it notes on your car, only to find out it was the neighbours and now they are pissed.

Joe Liebgott:

100% buy you those fake lotto tickets and let you believe it for the longest time. He would get Web countless times with it. Every time the man falls for it and Lieb just finds it so funny. He let's Web call all of his family members every time he "wins". It happens so often that the family members on the phone know it's a prank and try to explain it to him.

David Webster:

None of his pranks have ever been successful. OR when he does pull pranks he accidentally gets himself. He does the cling wrap on the toilet, forgets about it, pees all over the ground. Fills a room with water cups, forgets about it and walks into said room and tips over all of the cups. Like this man just can't win. Poor guy.

Buck Compton:

The only prank he does in the warm bucket prank. He is convinced it will work every time. It never does. He literally does tests, he's so invested on getting it to work. It's basically become an experiment for him. He tries out different water temps, different vessels he puts the water in, how deep he puts the hand in the water. He has a little notebooks of each time he has tried the prank and the method he used.

Eugene Roe:

He's a cute prankster. He opens two boxes of cereal and switches the bags. So you think you are getting lucky charms, but instead you get frosted flakes. Gene thinks it is the funniest thing seeing sleepy Babe questioning every thing in existence as frosted flakes appear out of the lucky charms box. Babe still being half asleep just shrugs and tucks into his breakfast. Gene has to explain the prank to him later.

Babe Heffron:

Does the, "oh yeah I put premium air into the tires." To Gene. Gene is losing his mind, thinking babe paid $100 for air. Also has a bunch of fake items, like vomit and dog poo that he gets Gene with all the time. "Gene the cats puked all over the lap top!!" Poor Gene is stressed to the max with Babe lmao.

Don, Skip and Penk:

The trio is trioing. If there is one group that is forever pranking, it's these lot. Whether it's each other or their friends, they are always down for a cheeky prank. Fill a room with ball pit balls, foam, balloons. Breaks into your house and turn it into a full out haunted house. These boys are hard out, it's go big or go home. Nothing is off the table, they will invest life savings into a good prank. Watch your backs they are after you, they will punk you. They seriously talk about starting and producing their own punked series. 100% has a prank youtube channel that blows up.

#boom #you've been punked #theres a camera #over there that's a camera #the mirrors are all camera #actor #that man right there #an actor #she's an actress #the baby a paid actor #GET PUNKED BITCH #band of brothers #hbo war #donald malarkey #skip #penk #web #lieb #buck compton #joe toye #dick winters #bill guarnere #lewis nixon #baby eugene #easy company #eugene roe #babe heffron #ron speirs #carwood lipton

[whorediaries-09]

this party's shit

pairing - sirius black x reader warning(s) - fluff, alcohol. a/n- AHHHH

little train.

you didn't really hear james over the loud music. but you do catch up on the important things said over the phone. that is why you found yourself in the most unflattering attire while entering one of the most lavish bars of london. at some point, you were even worried that you wouldn't be allowed in the bar.

but of course you didn't have enough time to fix yourself and make yourself presentable. you didn't even care about rashly driving to the bar.

it was urgent and sirius black had thrown a tantrum that he needed you. no wonder he was an idiotic bloke.

you're rushing into the club, running to the vip section where james had told you they had been lounged at. and god it's a sight when you reach there. sirius is standing upon the table, dancing around with a bottle of beer, with a cigarette hanging from his slender fingers. he's throwing around his hands, his crop top riding up all the way, his low waisted flared jeans showing the elastic of his boxers. from the neck of his top, hangs several silver chains and a heart shaped sunglass. within the low purple lights of the club, his tattoos reflect magnificently. and god forbid you could be drunk on that sight.

when his eyes falls upon yours, he stops dancing around. for a moment, you see his pupils recovering from the haze of alcohol. he smiles, showing his pearly white teeth.

he stumbles, trying to get off the table. you rush towards him, hoping to catch him so he doesn't injure himself. but he jumps off the table just fine. he puts on his heart shaped sunglasses. he wraps his hand around your wrist, trying to pull you on the couch. you don't move.

'sirius,' you warn. he hums, chuckling happily.

'h'lo babeee,' he drags. 'come join us, pleasee,' he says. it's no use arguing with him when he gives you the biggest puppy eyes known to mankind.

you sigh. with a stone in your heart, you say,

'no, sirius, we need to go home,' sirius leaves your wrist, jumping in what seems...excitement.

'folks!! she's taking me home! the girl i've been in love with for so long is taking me home!!'

your cheeks instantly redden, as the blood rushes to them. you only hope the purple lighting covers it up.

'sirius! i'm taking you to your home and i'm going back to mine,'

he stops jumping. like a little whiny child, he stamps over to you. but he listens. and that's what matters. so, you let him hold your hand while you take him out. the night breeze welcomes you as you escape from the atrocious scents of beer and whiskey that dimmed in the club.

before you're able to take him to your parked motorcycle, however, he holds you by the wrist.

'tell me, bbaabeee. don't you like me?' like? i do more than just liking you.

'i like you alright, sirius.' his face dampens.

'what, do you want me to dislike you?' you ask, letting your hand free from his grip. you give him a helmet.

'now, wear this.'

'no.'

'why not?'

'it's no point in living if you just...like me'

'that, sirius is a very bad thing to say. now sit down.'

'it'll ruin my hair,' he elaborates.

'is your hair more important or your life?'

'my hair is my life!'

god you wanted to hit him. square on the chest. you stay silent, sitting on the motorbike. he sits behind you, wrapping his hands tight around your waist.

*-

he's tucked under the duvet. you've wiped off his makeup, rubbed in moisturizer onto his extremely dry skin.

'hi,' you say, sitting by his bed. he still seems sad about something.

'hi,' he says, not meeting your eyes.

'what are you thinking about?'

'is it true then? do you just like me?' you scrunch your eyebrows.

'do you want me to hate you then?'

'no...i just wish you loved me the way i love you.'

you suck in a sharp breathe. it's okay, you assure yourself. he's drunk, gibbering nonsense. still it doesn't stop the feeling of hurt deepen and sting.

'i don't understand you,' he looked at you as if you'd said something direly stupid.

'do you not understand me, or do you pretend to not understand me?' he asked. your heart skipped a beat, mind reeling with so many answers, but none coherent. he grinned. he'd got you.

you stutter.

's-shut up. you'll shut up when you're not drunk,' you said. you tried not to grow flustered over his gaze that ran throughout your body, as if drinking the sight of you in.

'i'm feeling soberest i've ever felt in my life right now, sweetheart,' he said. he got up, resting his back against the headboard. you rolled your eyes.

'that is the biggest lie ever, and you know it, sirius black.' he blew a raspberry at you.

'maybe not the soberest, but i'm feeling pretty clear ya'know?'

the silence was almost deafening. try as hard as you might, you couldn't really escape the fact that sirius black had just confessed to you. it felt ridiculous because last you remembered, it was you pining over him since your school days.

your hints went seemingly unnoticed, as if he was an oblivious brick. but god forbid, he could catch onto everything you hinted at. not you mention you weren't actually very subtle about it. he wished he wasn't scared back in the day, otherwise he wouldn't have to face this day. his hopes were however high. he hoped you still had your feelings for him, just like he did.

you were acting like a dense wall, even when he'd spelt it out for you.

'you can't take a hint, can you?'

'you know i can only properly function when someone's direct with me,'

sirius grinned. he knew how he could be direct with you. it was perhaps a stupid decision, but too tempting to not try. so he grabbed you by your neck, pulling you closer, smashing your lips against his.

the hint was received.

**********************************

taglist - @reggieisfit @siriuslycaptainofthedawntreader @jamespottergf @eternallybipanicking @fictional-magic @iamgayforyourmom1510

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#harry potter fanfiction #harry potter #marauders #sirius black #sirius x reader #sirius black smut #the marauders #sirius black x reader #sirius black imagine #marauders era #sirius black thoughts #sirius black x oc #sirius black fanfiction #sirius black fanart #sirius being sirius #sirius black fluff #sirius black angst #fanfiction #james & peter & remus & sirius

[burning-academia-if]

How would the Ro's react to their partner (mc) sitting down on their lap and doing their makeup??

I'm going to be honest, I couldn't tell if you meant "MC sits down in their lap and does the RO's makeup" or "MC sits down in the ROs lap and does their own makeup" but I went with the 1st one because it felt more fun lol

Rook: He leans back and lets you, without needing much convincing at all. He also isn't about to question why you decided you had to be in his lap to do this instead of in a normal position. He might get a little fidgety depending how long you're going for, tapping against whatever he's sitting on or on your legs or anything else.

Beck: I think he'd be a little excited to try makeup lol, although the closeness makes him pause for a second before he notices what you're going to do. He closes his eyes for the full thing, eyelids twitching when you touch certain parts of his face, fingers twitching against your skin in the same way.

Rhea: She might be shy because of how you're sitting, but she would also love it if the both of you did each other's makeup. While you're doing hers, she's already talking about all the different things that you'd look good with and how to accentuate your best features. It sort of almost turns into her talking about how attractive she finds you without her realizing it

Zoe: They can't tell whether they want to go still or twitch away. Ultimately, they sit rod straight, trying to figure out where to place their hands. Your face is so close, and thank god they need to close their eyes for parts of this, because they keep getting distracted by you. After you're done, they might quietly ask if they can do your own.

Lars: He looks wildly unamused, but he just casually keeps an arm around your waist to keep you steady as he lets you do what you want. If you try to do anything too elaborate, he probably won't entertain it, but he does let you mess around a little bit.

???: My first image is that one Meme Pose of the one girl doing the other's make up (if you know, you know) lmaO. I don't think they'd be the biggest fan of the feeling of it against their skin, but they also would never say no to you. You might get their hands wandering just a little, but it's less heated and more them trying to distract themselves from the sensation of the brush and the texture of the makeup then anything heated

#em answers #ch: rook #ch: beck #ch: rhea #ch: zoe #ch: lars #ch: ??? #if I was wrong let me know lmaO #admittedly was a little head empty no thought for the 2nd one but half of that is because it's been another Week #also rhea and mc doing each other's make up is so cute to me pocketing that away for later

[falconwhitaker]

.

#I think the biggest thing I'm trying to get #from the Quint*n R*views situation #is a reinforcement of the 'creators are not my friends' thing #both in terms of 'trying to befriend a creator to get them to date you is bad' #and in terms of 'other creators I like are allowed to have takes I disagree with/think are shit' #like with the knowledge I have now? #I think Dan Ols*n was kind of a dick about it #but I'm still going to watch his videos #because I'm interested in the content he makes #because he's a human being allowed to have shit takes or to fuck up #and because he's not my friend #and nor are Emily or Sarah #they are essentially random strangers who make cool things I enjoy to watch #and that's okay #I'm not going to stop watching a huge swathe of the videos I enjoy because some creators have some interpersonal issue that is #(and I cannot stress this enough) #none of my fucking business #to conclude I don't think Quinton did anything wrong in this situation and I do think his former editor needs help #and not in a sarcastic way – they do seem to be struggling pretty badly #and that it's a bit shit to let prior personal issues affect how you react to somebody being treated poorly #but at the end of the day all y'all are human and messy and imperfect and I cannot be the purity police #I am fucking tired #and unless a creator has provably done or said something absolutely abhorrent? I cannot be bothered to care #also I have censored the names in this because I don't want to get a load of flack #and also because I don't want the people I'm talking about to see this tbh #because they don't need to see my thoughts on their interpersonal situations because I am – again – a fuckin random stranger

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Lan Wangji Goes To Lotus Pier AU: Part 5: Flip Slip.

(Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 4.5)

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #mdzs au #Yungmang Jiang Training Arc AU #lan wangji #wei wuxian #digital art #Trying out some digital techniques to see if I can get closer to feel/style of my traditional comics. #So far the biggest difference is *colouring* Digital colouring feels...not good. I have complained about this before and I'll complain agai #Before we get into the sad stuff with Yungmeng Jiang in the PD-MDZS comics lets have some lighthearted fun! #Remember that if anything bad happens to these Jiang disciples in the canon comic - they are happy in this AU B'*) #I think one of the funniest things about the teenxian dynamic is how WWX accidently finds things that get LWJ to feel flustered. #My guy wwx goes 'I'm going to lightly bully/tease this nerd 'cause his reactions are funny.' and LWJ goes “My god. He's everything to me.” #Part two of the fun part of this dynamic is that LWJ is ever so lightly self aware enough to LOATHE THIS CRUSH. #Hence why I have been marinating on this 'Accidental Lan headband miscommunication' concept. #This is how LWJ assumes that WWX knows what the band means in this AU. This will be relevant later. #And YES! I am still going to be making comics for this AU. I have so many ideas I simply can't hold onto forever.

[dawnthefluffyduck]

hey that's not supposed to be out there (uploaded wrong version at first haha whoops)

#not supposed to be that color either #i wonder who that belongs to #i had a very vague meaning for this in mind but saying it would spoil the fun #christ this took me forever #i wanted to do a quick project to give myself a break from my final #but accidentally made an entirely new kind of nightmare #BUT i can proudly say that i am very proud of this despite how long it took me #alrighty this blog is all about tracking progress so my thought on this; #it's not really as energetic as i had hoped to make it so i think that's the biggest technical issue i have with this #i'll try to get back to doing more gestures soon as a way to help with that #i think my shadows are a bit confusing too #i'm looking at it now and his glasses kinda taper off into the void of his fur bc i didnt mark the shadow along the left of his ear #but the thought of digging back through layers to fix it and blending that mess in is giving me a headache so i'm content with leaving it #i think i learned a lot about light and reflections though #my shadows aren't the greatest but i had so much fun rendering the glasses #and the glow of the soul pushed me to think about bounce light a lot more #figuring out how to make the colors look like they were glowing was a whole separate issue #i did it in the last big ralsei drawing i did but not nearly to this extent #i won't be doing something this large for a while after this but i'll keep trying to work on the things i didn't like about this #i think i'm gonna start putting my self-crit in the tags from now on #it really does bulk up the posts and it's hard to scroll past #i like reflecting on my work like this though #i've been able to draw a lot more since i've started doing it because it helps me create specific goals for myself #lets me keep pushing myself while still having fun with my art #ralsei #deltarune #deltarune fanart