#In Defiance of Time AU | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

just-some-random-blogger · 1 year

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The Supreme Empress

Kylo Ren x Reader

Summary: The dark side chose you. They pried you out of the rebel camps and dragged you from the ashes and the corpses of your family. The dark side chose you to strengthen the force, to be the vessel for their plans, to be the bride of the Supreme Leader's pupil, to bear Kylo Ren's seed and ensure the might of their divine wrath.

Word Count: 11k+ 🧍‍♀️💀

Warnings: fem!Reader, slow burn, forced marriage AU, themes of stockholm syndrome/gaslighting/brain washing, mentions/depictions of violence, enemies to lovers?, smut (scratching, marking, ?manipulating?, fingering, vaginal penetration, cock warming), fluff, angst, typos, etc.

A/N: this fucking ai chat man. fuck that shit MINORS DNI honestly. its my fault for making a plot. i just wanted to write smut fml. i hate it here. i couldn't even finish it cos now i cant write the smut dafaq? anyway im sure i got typos so you must forgive me. i have not gone through this yet and i need to brush my teeth and pull myself together bye Tagging: @pinksirensong @aralezinspace @sloanexx

I fell to my knees. I was in tears, in dust, in blood, and in pain. My wrists were bound behind me and my clothes were tattered and torn.

This was it. This was the day I die. I felt it in my bones. This was the reckoning.

And then my deliverer, my executioner, came before me. And then I felt the Force in him echo in the room and ripple through me like a blade through my chest.

It was him. The phantom that haunted me every time I closed my eyes. He was the nightmare in my sleep, and the damning voice in my head in the morning. The dark warrior, death given form, the murmuring voice of the shadows.

The Sith Lord.

Here he is, crossing this bridge from the entrance of this cursed compound.

The place is busy, busy with its plans of destruction. I heave at the grandness of it all. It was terrifying to see it up close, especially since I was evidently at the top, and it was a very long drop down.

I crane my neck up at him, face stained with tears. I was exhausted but I put on my last show. I bared my last look of defiance before he kills me, before he finally completes this cycle of torment he has been inflicting onto me.

I close my eyes and await his judgement.

I feel him come before me, but he instead walks past, and I hear someone choke from behind.

"Did I not instruct that she be left unharmed?" his voice barks through his dark mask.

My heart pounds as I hear straining from behind me. I steal a look from over my shoulder and instantly regret it when I see the two stormtroopers that dragged me here get thrown down the side of the bridge. I shudder. Like I said, it's a long drop down.

I look straight when he returns to me. I feel him undo my shackles with his Force, and then... he clutches my arm to help me stand.

I look up at him. I see my reflection on his helmet. I clench my jaw, "what do you want from me?"

"My empress-"

My stomach rolls.

"-I have finally retrieved you from your sullied camp to bring you to your rightful place next to me. To claim you as my own."

A shiver runs down my spine.

No, this can't be real.

My breathing strains. I grip my hands and I begin to step back.

It electrocutes me, this searing cold voice in my brain. It was a suddenly as if I remembered the dialogue in the horrors of my slumber that I so hardly tried to suppress. It was replaying now, the voice of the malevolent, the voice of the creature ruling my nightmares. "I give you to my pupil. With your Force converged with his, the purest of warriors will be borne. And my power will know no bounds."

"You remember now, bride," my captor iterated, "that voice in your head right now-- that is the Supreme Leader; that is Snoke."

I step back, "bride?" my breath hitches.

I was his b--

My knees almost give in, but again, his hold on my arm keeps me upright.

I feel my eyes begin to water.

Please, please, let this be another horrible, horrible nightmare.

"Is everything prepared?"

"Yes, my lord," two voices call out from behind me.

"Good," he says, and I released, "I will watch as you prepare her. I will not allow her be injured further."

I was--

I was here to be sacrificed to the darkness.

I was here to answer to the calls that have been plaguing me for so long, ever since that day my home planet was invaded, ever since everything I knew was reduced to atoms.

I let out a loud yelp when I am splashed with cold water. I let out a breathy curse and the servant who had done it, who had profusely apologized, is suddenly being choked.

It is only now I am cognizant again. It was now that I was aware I am in the bathroom, stripped naked in a tub, and my captor has his servant in a chokehold from across the room. I gasp and cover my bare chest, looking over my shoulder as he hisses, "you could not have made the water warmer? How would you like to be dunked in a pool of ice water?"

My breath hitches, "let her go!"

His voice buzzes behind his helmet as he curls his hand further with his outstretched arm, "she has one task, one simple task, and if she cannot perform it, then she is no use to me."

I panic as I see the servant's eyes water. I jolt when the other servant grabs my shoulder and begins to wash my skin as though nothing was awry. I turn from the servant back to him, "LET HER GO!"

He does nothing.

"LET. HER. GO!"

He seems to be debating my words.

I panic and quip breathlessly, "let her go!"

I sigh in relief when the servant is dropped.

A shiver runs down my spine when he goes at ease by the door. He clutches his hands before him and announces, "thank your empress for her mercy."

Immediately, before she can even catch her breath, the servant responds, "th-ank you, empress." The woman quickly begins to attend to me again.

I am far beyond perturbed.

I don't know what to do with myself, not when I was being bathed by strangers, not when I naked in the tub, not when he was there, watching me.

Why the fuck did that sicko have to watch like a bird in a fucking cage?

Careful, bride.

I stiffen in my place. The servants working on my body halt their work and ask me if their touch was too rough.

Lest you forget I have also been in your dreams. You ought to honor me even in your thoughts, baby bird.

"... my empress?" one servant calls.

"She is fine," he answers for me, "you may proceed."

And then, I'm being dragged out of the tub and patted down in front of a huge mirror. I don't know what to cover, and I can feel him looking. Never mind my naked form in and of itself, but my cuts and bruises from ripping and screaming at the stormtroopers that pried me into their ship. It was loathsome sight to see.

"Must you watch me?" I ask accusingly yet under my breath.

"Yes," he replies, as if it makes anything better, as if it was actually a question, as if he didn't know what I meant with my words. And then he clarifies, as if it helped, "your physical state does not bother me. It does not make you any less than you are, my bride."

My eyes twitch as I am finally handed undergarments to wear. I find my voice again, finally, "that's not the-"

"My pretty bride."

I cease my movements. What the fuck is he saying?

I don't have time to ponder those words as the servants urge me to dress and then quickly begin to fasten me with bandages, namely on my thigh where I had a cut and on my bicep that had a burn.

And though I so badly wanted to whine in protest and dramatic spite, I do my best to contain them. After all, the servants were helping me, they don't need to be Force choked for doing a job they were tasked to accomplish by their malignant master.

The next moment, I was being put into an elaborate garment and then they started painting on my face. Suddenly, I was.... turning into something else. I looked at the mirror and everything was so very real and unimaginable all at once. This was all happening to me. This wasn't a nightmare, not a fever dream, and there was no escape.

And then they told him- my groom- that I was done and I stared at my reflection, unable to recognize myself.

Who in the world were you?

"Come," he says, raising his hand up to me, "we must not delay any further."

I look at his reflection from the mirror. I look at his hand, hid behind his glove, his body, hid behind his cloak, and his face, hid behind his mask. I was going to me wed to this stranger, hidden in darkness?

I stare at him. I clench my jaw. I tell him I'm not going but utter not a single word. I sear it in his brain with my eyes. I scream it, blare it out as loudly as I could.

And yet he only watches me. He watches me with an urging dark hand.

My heart pounds in my ribs. I expect him to begin to lash out at one point, to choke me next, but he doesn't. He stands there, just stands there, reaching out to me.

Was this his twisted way of making me feel like I was willingly going to him? His way of telling me he was the only route in my life now?

My nostrils flare and I gather my skirt. I stare at him as I walk past him. My body was rigid and I had no idea where I was going, but I walked. And then he opened the doors for me.

My hand twitched when he took it, as he was suddenly beside me. I gasp at the unexpected and uninvited touch and I turn to him in surprise, but it is arduous with this ridiculous headpiece on me. His hand is massive and burning hot against my freezing clammy one. He tugs me toward him, "it's this way."

So, we when go this way.

We tread the halls, and I swear I could feel people following after us, more and more each moment, but I couldn't look back, literally, the fucking headpiece was in the way.

And then the atmosphere started to get darker, and it was like it was suddenly so much harder to breathe. It was clear to me we were heading for that large door, and that whatever was behind there was not good. It was not good at all.

He waved his hands once and the doors opened.

There was a great and terrible rush of Force that knocked into me. It was so strong and terrifying, I tighten my grip on my captor, and I cling onto him for safety. My breath is knocked out of my lungs, and all at once I am facing this large entity, this massive body of darkness, the literal flesh form of all my worst nightmares.

I was reeling back in fear. My stomach was in my chest and my heart was in my mouth.

I was in front of him. The Supreme Leader. Snoke.

And he was looking at me, looking right at me with contempt, with impatience, with exasperation.

My feet were stuck on the floor and my fingers were digging into arm of the man by my side. I couldn't do anything but feel my eyes water.

I snap to look my side when my name is called out. I turn to my groom as suddenly he is pacifying me, comforting me even, "the sooner we get this done, the sooner we can leave."

I don't know how I feel about his words, I don't know how I feel about how he takes my chin in his fingers and makes me turn my body to him. I don't know how I feel when he steadies my stupid headpiece when it knocks onto his shoulder. I don't know how I feel when I follow him mindlessly, when he and I head towards his gargantuan master.

Snoke speaks the moment we are in front of him. His voice rings, it reverberates, in the hall, in my ears, in my thorax, and in the dark corner of my mind that shudders at the recognition, "you have done well, my pupil. Very well."

My eyes lock with Snoke. I evade his stare and abruptly pull away from the man on my right. He stares at me for a moment when I do so, then looks back at Snoke, "thank you, master."

Snoke grumbles, "well, remove that ridiculous thing on your head and let us begin."

I don't know whether it is because I am fearful of the evil-king before me or because I am anticipative of the face of the man behind the mask, but I turn to him with a desperation. I turn to him when he removes his helmet and my breath catches in my throat.

He tucks his helmet under his arm and looks at me with his brown eyes that glistened with something sinister behind them. He parted his lips and I noticed the scar by its side that started by his brow went far past his cheek and collar. His hair was somehow perfectly tousled even after staying inside his face cage for so long. I don't know how I felt after seeing him face to face like this.

I suck in a sharp breath when he takes my hand. He promptly begins to speak.

"I-" he turns to our joined hands as he lifts them chest level, "Kylo Ren," his eyes dart back to me, "take you-"

My skin pricks at how he whispers my name. He says it as if it were a secret, as if he meant it with reverence, as if it was solemn.

"-to be my wife."

My empress.

I suck in a sharp breath at his voice in my head. My breath picks up. My stomach rolls. Get out.

Kylo Ren rubs my knuckles, "To protect you, to honor you, to venerate you until my last breath, or even beyond."

And then he looks at me. He stares at me. He bores into my being and plunges into my soul. I feel my hands begin to shake in his hold.

Kylo Ren looks in silence and I look in fear.

I start at the harsh call of the Supreme Leader to our side, "SPEAK YOUR VOWS, GIRL!"

I screw my eyes shut and gulp. I have to get out of here. Get me out of here! My breath strains now more than ever.

Suddenly, I hear a soft voice in my head. Suddenly, I dare to open my eyes and I see a disconcerting softness in my groom's expression.

Shhhhhhh.

He hushes me in my mind. He repeats his words from earlier.

The sooner we get this done, the sooner we can leave.

I open my mouth and huff helplessly. I repeat my groom's words and tears begin to fall from my eyes.

Snoke leans back in his throne and tents his hands together, "good, good. Then by the power of the darkness, the power vested in me, The Supreme Leader, the ruler of the galaxies and all peoples," he nods his head, "two have now become one."

My shoulders rise and my heart pounds at the explosion of loud exclamations. I look around the hall and only now realize that there were hundreds of individuals, looking down at us from the balconies above.

"Long live the Emperor and Empress!"

I am at a loss for what to do next. I don't know if I want to run away or drop dead. I find myself looking to Kylo Ren. Kylo Ren, whose brows slightly furrow in his seriousness. Kylo Ren who looks up to his people and raises his hand that is clutching his helm, inspiring them to cheer even more. Kylo Ren, who then looks down at me and firmly grips my hands before leading me out of the room.

I don't know what happens after that.

I think I'm having a panic attack.

Am I having a panic attack?

Can someone even think if they're having a panic attack?

I'm not having a panic attack.

"Enough," he speaks, turning to me, clutching my cheek. Kylo Ren looks at me with knit brows while his gloved hands make me face him. My neck strains because of the weight of my headpiece. He blinks at me and slips the thing off my head. A weight is lifted off my shoulders. Very suddenly, I think I'd have preferred if he removed my head altogether. He uses his Force to bring the object away. I watch as it floats off to a dresser, beside his helmet that was already there.

All at once, I realize I was in a bedroom. I look back at Kylo in horror. Oh, fuck, I was in a bedroom.

He huffs through his nostrils, "your thoughts are as loud as sirens."

I clutch my skirt tightly and slowly begin to move back.

Kylo watches me. He tilts his head down slightly and narrows his eyes.

I swallow the lump in my throat, "so what?" I shudder, "you're going to force an heir in me now?"

He raises his nose and tilts his head to the side, "it is my duty to sire an heir."

I gulp. My breathing begins to get shorter and shorter.

I start when he steps forward. I put more distance between us.

I shiver when he calls out my name.

"Don't," I point, "don't come any closer."

Kylo Ren offers me the courtesy of stopping in his place.

I catch my breath and watch him as he brings his hands behind him. Goosebumps form on my skin when he speaks, "I have just vowed to protect you, to honor you, and to venerate you." He brings his hands to the clasp of his cloak, "I will not force you to do anything with me that you don't want."

I scoff, tightening my grip on my clothes, "and you think I wanted to marry you?!"

I tense when Kylo unfastens his cloak and folds it in front of him. I freeze in my spot in anticipation of what he's going to do next. He looks at his cloak then looks at me, "you do not understand it now, but you are the key to securing the strength the Sith, securing the Order."

A shiver runs down my spine. How can he say that so plainly?

I cannot comprehend how utterly indoctrinated this ideation is in his being. It is shocking honestly, to see up close and personal that he believes so much in his cause, that he genuinely does not see fault in this, in forcing me to marry him, in taking me by force, in destroying my camp, in laying waste to my people, on wreaking their ill-judgement to the stars.

I shake my head, "do you honestly believe I will eventually come to you with- with open arms?!"

Kylo Ren straightens his posture. I nearly trip when he walks over to me as I attempt to rush back. He raises two fingers and keeps me upright with his Force. He keeps me in place and stands before me. He leans his face close to mine, then barely opens his mouth to speak, "I do."

And then, he releases me and walks away.

I watch him as he exits the room and leaves me. The sound of the door closing is all that's left.

I begin to pant. I begin to heave in anger, in loss, in panic, in desperation. I have to get o-

I slap my hands on my mouth. I screw my eyes shut and shudder.

Silent. I have to be silent.

The next day he asked me to accompany him while he ate.

Breakfast, lunch, and dinner, he said, I should join him, so that we would both grow accustomed to each other's company during such intimate moments, and that we would also get to know each other more.

I scoffed at the idea, so much for not forcing me to do anything I don't want.

"I am not forcing you, wife," Kylo calls across the expanse of the long table.

My eyes that were idly watching my fork swirl the unknown delicacy on my plate dart to him. My shoulders tense as Kylo Ren grabs his glass and drinks from it.

I huff, "do you mind getting out of my head?" I ask though it wasn't really a question, it was a threat, as much of a threat a captive could give.

Kylo sets the object down and taps his finger on it, "if you don't want to join me..." he thinks for a moment, "you don't have to."

I straighten in my seat. I silently look out to him in challenge.

I stiffen when the pitcher begins to float and water is then poured in my cup. I clench my jaw, turning back to Kylo, finding his raised finger.

"I would prefer if you dined with me though," he says, putting the pitched back down.

I turn to my food, idly pushing it around again, "I would prefer if I dined by myself... in my-" our "-room."

I hear him exhale. I hear the contact of his cutlery on his plate, "a disappointing conclusion."

I slowly avert my eyes from my food to him. He is now focused on his own plate. He mumbles, "but I will allow it."

The next day, I am woken to eat breakfast and urged to get out of bed. I explain to servant I was allowed to eat in my room and that I don't want to eat yet. I scoff in disbelief when I am told I am meant to tour the place with the master, with that damned Kylo Ren, and is thus advised to get ready.

And so I did. I got ready and went into the dining room and interrupted his breakfast. If I can't have peace, neither can he.

Kylo turns to me and nods, "wife."

I clench my teeth, "tour me now," I huff, "I'm not hungry, so tour me now."

He turns back to his food and seemingly debates my words for a moment. He then stands from his seat and puts on his helmet, leading me out of the room. If I could burn holes onto his back with my eyes, he'd have been nothing but charcoal.

I suppose I should have given more attention to his tour than I did because knowing the place would surely benefit me when I make my attempt to esc-

"Are you certain you're not hungry?" Kylo Ren asks out of the blue as he leads me down the weapons room, "you're quite snippy and demanding. I would assume that's because you're hungry, baby bird."

I can't help but scoff at his mockery, "or, this is just how I am," I mumble, "so don't act like you know me." I aimlessly look at all the weapons on display, weapons meant to destroy others like me.

But I do know you.

I avert my gaze to him. I stiffen as I glare.

"I have been in your mind and seen the depths of your soul," he mutters, "and I know you're irritable because you're hungry."

And then he conjures up a tin-wrapped object in front of me.

"Here," he gives me the item using his Force, "you can eat this while we walk back to our chambers."

My lips curl in disgust, "is this meant to be enticing?"

He tilts his helmet clad head, "it's meant to be my lunch for later," he grabs the floating object, then my wrist, placing the silver thing on my palm.

I tense in his touch and I am glad he doesn't linger long there. I look at his would-have-been lunch then turn back to him, seeing my scowling reflection on his dumb helmet, "what an honor to know I won't be poisoned since this is apparently yours."

"It is mine," he rebuts rather impatiently.

I roll my eyes and shove it into his chest, "if you want me to be less irritable, let me go back to my chambers." I catch myself when I say this. It sounds like I want to be in that damned cage, instead of outside of this compound. I correct myself, "or better yet, let me go."

Kylo Ren places his lunch in pocket that I didn't know he had, "We will continue this tour tomorrow."

And so we did. This time, he made sure to have someone come to me after I ate.

I must say, perhaps he was partially correct in the fact I was irritable because I was hungry. I did find him more bearable today, as far as forced husbands and captors go. But then again perhaps it was because he was touring me in the biggest library I have ever seen.

I couldn't even feign disinterest as he motioned to each area of the place and explained they were arranged by planet of origin.

I was far too busy craning my neck up to see how high the bookshelves reached that I bump into one. Or at least I thought it was a bookshelf and not fucking Kylo Ren. I jolt when I look at him, firstly because we had a collision, secondly because he magically didn't have his helmet on anymore.

I reel back as he looks down at me, on I think a more figurative sense if anything.

I am immediately uncomfortable under his gaze. I mutter, "sorry."

"You have questions," he mutters. He turns to me and lifts his chin, "ask them."

I evade his stare. Don't tell me what to do.

"I'm not telling you what to do," Kylo Ren retorts after hearing my thought.

I turn back to him. I snort and grumble, "stay out of my head."

He looks up at the shelves and then looks down at me with his eyes, "a hundred layers."

I pull my head back and scoff in disbelief, "the shelves have a hundred layers?" I look over my shoulder haphazardly, "seems unnecessary hard to manage."

"Well," he brings his head down, "it hosts knowledge from peoples across over the stars. It must be capable of securing the vastness."

When I look back at him, I tense when I see he has come far too close to me. It would have been wise to pull away, perhaps to even shove him off to get my point across, but somehow, I find his proximity as a challenge. I grit my teeth and narrow my eyes at him, "undoubtedly stolen, plucked from the rubble of your destruction."

A chill rushes up my spine when he smirks at me. It remains lopsided and smug as he whispers "I don't feel the need to preserve artifacts from a race that is unable to see the glory of my purpose."

That's it. I begin to slowly step away from him.

"Do you want to know how these shelves are managed?"

"No, I really-"

I make a sound when he grabs me and locks me against his chest. Before I can even begin to fight back, I find my feet get lifted off the ground along with him. Next thing I know, I'm gasping and clinging onto him for dear life.

"Put me down," I gasp against his chest as I seal my arm tightly against him.

He chuckles as we continue to float up. He tightens his grip on me as I feel myself begin to slip. He flexes his feet and pushes them beneath mine. I look up at him as I step on his boots.

"This is how you manage them," he iterated, then motioning to his side, "or you use the ladder."

I scoff in disbelief, grabbing onto his collar, "put me down, Kylo."

He blinks at me, lips curing into a bigger smile, "alright."

He slowly bringing me down and I tense when he clutches my waist and speaks out my name.

I look away from him and watch as the floor nears. By the time it was close enough, I jump off him and walk away.

Kylo Ren watches and chuckles, "the exit is the other, baby bird."

I stop in my tracks and glare at him. He does not waste time and walks up to me. My breath hitches when he does, reeling over the look on his face. He moves past me and walks away.

I watch him as he does so, and then an idea strikes me. I debate my chances on living here and convincing the servants to get me food... a bucket-

"Don't be ridiculous. I will throw you over my shoulder if you will not follow," Kylo Ren announces. He stops in his tracks and looks over to me, "you are my empress, not my captive, even though you feel that way."

I watch him as he raises his hand to me, reaching out to me again like on the day of our wedding, except this time, I could see his eyes and is pouty lips. I huff through my nostrils and grip my fists. I walk over to him glaring at him all the way until I move past him.

Kylo watches, a glint in his eye as he does.

I hear him chuckle.

The next day, I woke up, realizing I was allowed to sleep in. That got me tremendously excited, and so I quickly began to ready myself to begin my attempts at an esca-

I slap my hand on my mouth and release a deep breath from my nostrils.

I take a few more moments and ready to exit my chambers.

The moment I'm about to exit though, I am faced with a servant. I tense at the sight of her but offer her a pinched smile, "Rezba."

Rezba nods and walks in with a tray of food, "please eat before you leave. I will be scolded if I am found to failed to feed you."

Dammit, Rezba.

I sigh, turning to my feet. I watch the woman as she walks off and sets the table. She was one of the servants that helped prepare me on my... wedding day, the one that didn't get choked. As for the one that was, I have not seen or heard from her ever since.

My conscience presses on me every time I think of this. I sigh, walking over to her. I sit down on the chair by the table and smile, "thank you, Rezba. You can go now."

Rezba nods, "as you wish, empress."

I wipe my face as he walked away. I quickly stuff my face with the food. I mean, after all, if I manage what I do, I'll need all the food I can get.

The moment I was done, I exit my chambers and head outside with purpose. I nod at the personnel that greet me and make sure to keep my mask of confidence as I make it to the launch pad.

I practically beam when I see a ship ready for the picking. But then I feel a force surge through me.

"Fuck."

My bride.

I turn over my shoulder in horror. Lo behold, the dark mask of my groom, strutting over to me with troops behind him.

"Come to visit me?" he muffles out behind his helmet.

I clench my jaw and turn to him, doing my best not to roll my eyes.

Somehow, I can see his smirk underneath as he speaks, "you didn't even change out of your nightclothes."

I let out a strangled sound as I turn to the two people behind Kylo. One had red hair and one was as clad in uniform as the Supreme Lord.

"This is General Hux and Captain Phasma," Kylo motions to the two of them.

I hum, "yes... hello," I smile without meeting my eyes, "well, now that I've... seen my husband, I'm... I'm going back to my chambers."

The two behind Kylo nod at me. I try not be so annoyed as I walk away.

Next time you plan to escape, you should probably change into something that would protect you from the harshness of space.

I grit my teeth and snap over my shoulder, "GET OUT OF MY HEAD!"

General Hux recoils at my voice. Kylo Ren chuckles under his breath.

The next day, I have no such luck of escaping at all.

"Don't you have some-" I quip over my shoulder as Kylo tails me like the dark shadow he was, "-I don't know... planet to blow up," my voice gets increasingly smaller as I say this and hear myself.

Kylo Ren, in one of the rare occurrences he did not have his helmet on, stops to look at me. He presses his lips together, "do you have a pla-"

"No!" I raise hands, "forget that I said that... please."

I turn away from him and begin to tread deeper into the halls of the library.

I hear him snort behind me, "I don't want you to continue to delude yourself into thinking escaping is an option. It would just be a waste of both our time if you do so."

I roll my eyes and shake my head, "and I don't want to delude you in thinking that I would ever stop trying to escape you."

I actually stop in my tracks when I hear him laugh out loud. I turn over to him in great offence as he then turns to me with bright eyes.

I seethe with venom, "I'm glad one of us finds this funny."

He straightens himself up and crosses his arms, "it's funny how you fail to see how alike we are."

My face drops in horror. I march over to him and point a finger at him, "we are nothing alike!"

I jolt when he grabs my wrist and pushes my hand down. The amusement in his face falters and shifts into something else, "aren't we, my empress?"

My heart begins to pound. I pull away from him and recoil.

My breathing begins to pick up as I rub my wrist.

Kylo watches me and makes up for the space between us by walking forward, "did that hurt you?"

"Does it matter if it did?" I quip.

His face softens yet his brows tighten, "it does."

I scoff.

"I am not the monster you make me out to be."

I scoff again as I continue to walk back, "oh yeah, then what ar-" I gasp when I hit something. I panic and turn, seeing it was the step ladder. I have no choice but to halt as Kylo presses nearer. I swallow the lump on my throat as I look at his face.

I will myself not to be so affected by his presence.

I clench my jaw.

My willpower is not very effective.

"I am your husband," he mutters.

I freeze when he brings his hands to my side, though he does not touch me. His eyes dart to my hands that I clutch to my chest. He releases a breath, "I want to bring order to the galaxy."

A shiver runs down my spine, "Kylo..."

His eyes lock on mine. I even my breathing.

I shake my head and knit my brows, "do you genuinely think," I speak softly with no hint of malice, "that killing billions is order?"

His jaw tightens. He drops his hands to his side, "it is an necessary stake for the greater good-"

"Greater good?!" I quip under my breath, grabbing onto his cheeks. I look at him with wide eyes as he looks at me with a similar shocked expression, "you believe razing through the stars is the greater good?"

My whole body pricks when he takes my wrists in his hands and whispers, "my love."

I suck in a sharp breath.

"You do not understand it now," he explains, shaking his head, "but everything that I am, everything that I do," his voice becomes really quiet, "is for us."

My expression drops where his softens.

"For our future," he whispers, "for our next generation and after."

"Kylo-"

"I do it because I believe in our cause," he cuts me off, "I do it because without us, the galaxy will never know anything but chaos."

My breath begins to strain.

He releases one wrist and reaches out for my face, "I will do all it takes, and give you all the time to understand this."

Mu face burns at the feel of his gloved hand. I shake my head, "why?"

"Because you are my star, my burning destiny," he mutters, "the Force brought you to me. I felt you that day on your home planet, you were so strong, you were so strong and so misguided. I tried to kill you that day, but you got away."

My eyes begin to water. I begin to relive that day in my head.

"Then I dreamt about you, I dreamt about how you escaped me and how I hated that you did. Snoke saw it. He saw you in my head. He saw your drive. He saw your weakness. He saw what you could become. And then, he said I burned because you were meant to be mine. He said our Forces were calling for each other, which was why I could not stop dreaming about you."

I begin to tremble against him.

He clutches my face with both hands, "don't be afraid. It took me a while to understand it as well, but-"

"Kylo-" I shudder, "you don't dream of me because I'm your bride, you dream of me because of him!"

He stills.

"Don't you see?" I pant, "he's manipulating you. The dark side is mani-"

"If anyone has been manipulated, it is you, baby bird," he grunts, "you were indoctrinated with beliefs that are short sighted and weak. I would not-"

He doesn't finish and turns his head to the side when a voice of a stormtrooper buzzes through the hall, "apologies for the interruption, my lord. I was tasked to escort you to the throne room, the Supreme Leader is summoning you."

Kylo Ren turns to face him. I suck in a breath as suddenly, he grabs my hand and pulls me with him as we walk past the stormtrooper, "an escort won't be necessary."

If I wasn't shaking a while ago, I surely was now, and Kylo Ren could feel it. Kylo stole looks over his shoulder. I did nothing but try to even my breath as we tread the hall.

I could feel him holding onto me with his Force, trying to contain me almost... trying to comfort me.

I tense when he releases my hand in lieu of draping his arm over my shoulder, "he will not touch you. He will not harm you," he mutters as I look up at him. He stares straight as we continue walking, "I will make it a point to keep this brief. You have nothing to worry about."

I wanted his words to comfort me, I wanted him to be able to comfort me so badly. And yet when I was face to face with his master, I couldn't even muster the courage to put my faux brave face on. He pulled away from me and pushed me behind him as he greeted the being.

"Why do you continue to disappoint me so, Kylo Ren?" Snoke inquires with a voice of disdain.

This had something to do about me, I am sure of it.

"I am doing everything you asked me," Kylo retorts rather simply.

"And I gave you a bride, yet still you have no efforts for an heir!" he accuses, "must I teach you even in the ways of the flesh, boy?!"

Kylo clenches his fist, he mumbles, "no."

"THEN DO YOUR DUTY!"

"I am making sure everything is perfect for her. She cannot bear me and heir if she is damaged or scared," Kylo retorts.

Snoke tilts his head, "and are you trying to say that has something to do with me?"

"I am SAYING-" Kylo Ren starts, raising his voice as he did. In my shock, I pull back at his cloak, not wanting to feel the wrath of his master. Not now, not ever, especially not in my dreams, not again.

Kylo holds himself back. He huffs, "I will do my duties as her husband. This isn't something for you to meddle with."

"Meddle?" Snoke scoffs but then laughs. He, in fact, laughs so hard, it echoes in the room. He catches his breath then sighs, "Fine." Snoke raises a finger and suddenly, Kylo's boots skid on the floor as he is moved away to reveal me from behind him.

I turn to Snoke, feeling my heart quicken in my ribcage.

Kylo steps back in front of me. I take his arm and hold onto it for dear life.

Snoke stares at his protégé. He tilts his head, "I expect this to change, soon. Her belly should never not be carrying an heir."

Her belly should never not be carrying an heir.

"Enough!" Kylo snaps me out of my trance. I turn to him, eyes wide, body trembling. We weren't in the throne room any more, we were in our chambers, soaked in dark retreat of it all. I had no idea when we got here. All I know was I was here with Kylo, who was clutching my face so tightly. He looks at me with something of annoyance, something of concern, "don't think about him anymore, think about me. Just think about me."

I shake my head in sheer disbelief. I push his hands away, "is that supposed to make me feel better?"

Kylo straightens.

"You," I start, "want me here for the same reason he does!"

His expression hardens.

"You and him had plagued me with nightmares for as long as I can remember," I shake my head, "the only reason, I think, I don't have them anymore is because I actually get to live my nightmares out in real life."

"So?" he quips, "what do you mean to say?"

I bite my lip, "just-" I feel my eyes water, "take what you want and... and-"

I hold my breath when Kylo grabs my chin and tilts my head up to look at him. He brings his face close to mine. His nose is barely brushing my own. I feel his hot breath on my face as he enunciates one word, "want."

I blink rapidly at the sound of his voice.

"Shhh," he hushes, "if it's Snoke you worry about, don't. I have been planning something for him, long before you even came to me. He is the least of your worries," he explains. "But do you know what I want, bride?" he asks, as though to taunt me.

I shudder. I think of replying, but I don't.

"I know what you want," he mutters. He begins to move forward, and so I have no choice but to move back as he pushes me in the direction he wants, "you want to run away from me, baby bird. You think you can break free."

His hand only leaves my chin when my calves hit the foot of the bed and I fall back, heart hammering, breath clawing at my throat. He drones, "but what I want?"

Kylo Ren undoes his gloves and undoes his belt as he towers over me.

I want to strangle your light. I want to break you so badly. I want to fucking burn you from the inside until you can only hear yourself screaming from how good it feels to finally have your wet, little c-

I slap my hands to my mouth I hear the thoughts running through his head.

Kylo stills. He tilts his head then chuckles, "so... you heard that?"

I sigh deeply, attempting to even my breath as I back away from him. I squeak when he lunges and traps me beneath him. He crushes me against his chest and pins my wrists by my head. I turn away from him as he whispers hotly against my ear, "it would be so easy to have you like this, right?"

My screw my eyes shut. Tears lace my lashes.

"You won't even fight me off, you couldn't."

I shudder when he releases one of my wrists and brings his free hand down to my thighs. I feel my body burn and tingle at his slow caress.

He kisses my jaw and my skin there is set ablaze, "you don't want to fight me off," he chuckles, "you could at least do something with your hand to save face."

When I finally remember where my free hand is, Kylo takes it back in his and lifts his head, "too late." He pushes himself up, "look at me."

I clench my jaw.

"You'll know never to make me ask for the same thing twice."

I give a shallow huff and open my eyes, looking up at him.

"I want you to beg me," he whispers, "I want you to be so desperate to finally," he begins to further pull away, "finally, take you," he knits his brows, "to make you my wife that you get on your knees and weep for it."

A shiver runs down my spine as I watch him get up from the bed and grab his gloves, "until then," he reaches his hand out and uses his Force to cover me with the sheets, "you belong to yourself."

He haunts me in my dreams that night. Not as a figure of darkness, not as a ghost, but as a man, as starving entity, ready to consume me, eager to take me.

He haunts me every night after. And every night his intentions are made clearer and clearer until I wake up and think he and I wake up and I'm shocked he's not actually there.

It became hard to look at him, especially when my stomach began to flip and my thighs involuntarily pressed together. I was turning sick.

And then one day, the news spreads like wildfire. Snoke is dead, Kylo Ren is the Supreme Leader, and I, his Supreme Empress.

It was weird. I was called Empress before and he was called Emperor before, but now, now it was real. Now I was parading with Kylo Ren in the capital, looking at citizens waving at us and throwing flowers our way. And then I was shaking strangers' hands and Kylo snarled at whomever dared embrace me a second too long.

But what really cemented our reign and the realness of it all, was when someone tried to attack me. Kylo felt the assailant before he got too close though and choked him dead in the middle of the crowd. I watched as the man's weapon fell to the ground, as he withered in pain, as he eventually stopped moving. He suffered. I knew Kylo wanted him to. The festivities were long over after that, and I was then I was reminded of who he truly was.

He was a brute. A beast. The shadow in my mind. He was-

I turn over my left as a blanket is draped over my shoulder. Kylo Ren sits beside me on the bed and offers me glass of water, "I'm sorry you had to see that."

I huff at the sound of his apology. I wrap my blanket tighter on me.

He sighs and brings the glass to the table using his Force, "I would do it again, though. You should know. I would not hesitate even a second."

I curl my legs up into my chest, "am I supposed to be grateful?"

"I would prefer if you were," he mutters.

"Kylo..."

I suck in a breath when he says his name.

"I'm- I'm too tired to argue. I want to go to sleep," I mutter, moving on the bed until I was laid down. Kylo watches me as I do this, then stands.

"Wait," I call out, surprising even myself.

Kylo stills.

No turning back now. "I... I don't want to be alone... not after that... even though you did it."

Kylo waits.

He debates my words.

I hide behind my blanket, "nevermi-"

The next thing I know, I feel him move next to me. And there, he lies.

I feel him next to me. We're under the same blanket. I feel myself begin to grow warm.

"I can get a separate blanket if you're so uncomfortable."

"Get out of my fucking thoughts."

"... ... I don't want to."

I grunt and wrap myself tightly under the blanket, surely yanking however much was on Kylo off.

"Your mind is an oasis to me."

I say nothing.

"My mind is a dessert, you are my oasis."

I huff through the sheets, "don't talk to me like that."

"Like what?"

"Like that!"

"I'm telling you what-"

"I'm done with this conversation."

I close my eyes and tighten my embrace on myself. I release a breath and try to clear my mind.

"Are you that cold?" Kylo murmers

"I'm not cold."

"I know."

"Then why did you ask?" I quip turning to him.

I freeze when I do so, instantly regretting my decision. He was lying on his side, looking at me, his face was right in front of mine and his arms were wrapped around himself. He blinks slowly as he looks at me, "I know you want to be held."

I huff through my slightly agape mouth, then I clench my jaw tightly. I move back from him cautiously, retreating into my covers, into myself.

"I can hold you," he mutters softly.

I turn away from him, feeling my body ignite.

"I want to hold you," he whispers even softer. Let me hold you.

Shut up, get out of my head.

He takes a moment before speaking again. He releases a breath, "am I that terrifying to you, baby bird?"

Yes.

"Then why do you mutter my name while you sleep?"

I tighten my arms around myself. Stop trying to get into my head.

"I'm already in your head," he retorts, voice closer now, "and in your heart."

"Shut up," I whimper.

I hear high-pitched laugh in my head. His voice surrounds me through the Force. It makes my skin raise. I'm only telling you the truth.

"Face me," he mutters, "coward."

I scoff. I heave, feeling my insides curdle. I clench my jaw then hiss, "at least I'm not a killer with no remorse."

He laughs, "you're making it seem like I should have let him attack you."

"You didn't have to kill him!" I snap, turning back to him, pushing myself up on my palms, "you could have given him a prison sentence."

"For what?!" he barks back, unravelling his crossed arms, lifting face up slightly, "so he could plan to attack you again, but next time when I'm not around to defend you?!"

"He only wanted to attack me because I'm married to you!" I hiss, sitting up from my spot.

Kylo sits up too and shakes his head, "he wanted to attack you because he thinks you're my weakness."

"Because I am your weakness!" I quip, "I'm your docile bride!"

He scoffs, grabbing my jaw, "you made yourself into this, little girl," he leans towards me. My pulse quickens as he pushes my head back, hand coming to the side of my face, fingers digging into my hair, "you where the rebel that fought against my troops and managed to escape me. The Force is strong with you," he places his other hand on the other side of my face, "that is why you are my bride."

When Kylo Ren pulls away and lies down, my insides begin to burn, to fume, and rage at his words. I watch him and I slowly begin to see red. And yet, he closes his eyes and acts like this whole conversation didn't happen. He prepares to sleep like there's nothing wrong.

This is my final straw.

I lunge at him. I dart my claws out and growl. I jump on him and press down on his throat. I straddle him and lean all my weight all my strength onto his airways. His eyes shoot open. His hands dart to my wrists. He begins to choke. I put all my anger into my grip. I force against him, knowing full well if I lost the upper hand, I'd be dead.

Except he doesn't make an move beyond clutching my wrists. I wait for him to attempt to overpower me, I wait for him to throw me off him the way I knew he could, and end all of this, and, in turn, kill me instead, but he doesn't.

He doesn't fight back.

Instead he looks up at me as his air leaves him as his face begin to turn maroon, as his veins begin to stress, as his final breaths escape his lips. And then I realize what I was doing and I pull back.

I pull back and heave in horror, wrists breaking free of his hold, hovering by my chest as I looked down at him while he caught his breath. He closes his eyes as his palms land on my thighs. My eyes water, the same way tears laced his lashes.

Why didn't he fight back?

Why isn't he fighting back?

He wanted me to kill him?

I watch as his chest rises and falls beneath me. I am then suddenly aware of our position. I feel a tinge burn in my cheeks and my core. It's inexplicable, whether I am embarrassed over the fact I tried to kill him or the fact I was straddling him beneath me.

Before I can get off him though, he finally overpowers me and traps me beneath him. Easily. Swiftly. I was nothing against him. And this fact was amplified as he pins my wrists down on the pillows overhead with just one hand. He presses himself against me, heaving heavily, as if he was doing something with great restraint. It makes my stomach drop.

"That's the difference between you and I," he pants, as his one hand comes up to my neck, "if I wanted you dead, my love..." he begins to press down on my throat.

I begin to panic and thrash beneath him.

Shhhhhh.

He steadies me still in his place. I am overcome by him, unsure if it was just his physical prowess or if he was using his Force as he pushes down on me. I get a semblance of an answer when the pressure on my throat remains and I unable to move my wrists though both his hands go to the sides of my thighs.

I gulp as he leaves hot kisses all over my skin. I huff sharply when I am released of my Force bounds. My hands dart to his torso, gripping at his clothes as I try to push him away.

I would never damage you.

I let out a sound when he releases his chokehold.

Not unless you want me to.

Kylo then begins to bring his face close to mine, pressing our cheeks together for a moment. My stomach rolls and my breath hitches when his hot lips meet my mine. My heart is racing. He undoubtedly could feel it against him.

My panic rises. I quickly manage in between kisses, "Kylo-"

"Beg me," he pulls away and breathes against my ear, "beg me..." he kisses the pulse on my neck, "to get off you-- to leave you alone, to shoot myself into the sun-"

Kylo begins to rub himself between my open legs. Slowly. Roughly. I whimper. He freezes. I feel blood rise up my face. I begin to push him back harder.

He tightens his hold on me, repelling my actions by pressing his weight further onto me, "beg me to finally make you live out your fantasies," his voice loudens, "to make you mine."

I grit my teeth tightly.

"Beg me," he groans, "beg."

I whine, nails digging into his sides as I push against him.

He kisses my jaw, hands leaving my thighs, grabbing my wrists, pushing them down on my sides, "use your words. Hark to me, my baby bird."

My breath hitches, "Kylo, please."

Kylo pulls his face back, nose just above mine, looking down at me with hooded eyes. He waits for me to continue, breath straining as he did. My lips part and my feel my pulse echo in every inch of my body.

I gulp and ready to speak... but I can't. I don't. My mouth goes dry and all I could think about was how his dark locks were framing his face, and how his lips were moving as he heaved arduously, and how I wanted to find where the scar on his face ended.

Then I am ripped out of my incredulous thoughts.

"Please what?" his breath his hot against my face as he coaxes.

I close my lips and catch my breath that was leaving me, "please... stop."

"Stop what, darling?" he utters. I close my eyes when he leans his forehead against mine. He releases my wrists, hands coming to my sides, nails scratching down me until his large hands ended up on my thighs again. I squeak when his hips buck into mine with more intent.

My hands come to Kylo's neck, fingers digging into the roots of his hair.

He shifts atop me, pulling his head back up, weight all on my core, making me moan at the pressure. His nose brushes against mine. He breathes out my name. My eyes shoot open because of it.

I find his eyes are screwed shut, a line between his brows. His jaw clenches. His nostrils flare as he steadies his breathing.

"Kylo-"

"Yes," he speaks before I even finish saying his name.

His eyelids slowly part when I tug his face towards me, legs tightening around his waist, crossing over his back. He lets out a huff that bounces from my face to his. His hands rub down to my butt and there his grip tightens.

Right when our lips brush against each other, he lifts his head ever so slightly and whispers, "beg me to make you mine."

My throat tightens.

"I need to hear it," his voice is soft.

I suck in a breath and call out his name.

He releases a sharp one as he says mine.

I call out his name.

He responds with mine.

I hesitate.

He rubs his nose against mine then says quietly, "make me yours please."

I suck in a breath. My stomach explodes with butterflies. "Make... me yours," I mumble, relaxing against him, hands rubbing down his neck to his shoulders. I close my eyes and sigh, "please."

He nods, "louder."

"Kylo-"

"Louder," he mutters with a tight breath, "one last time."

"Make me yours, please."

Kylo hisses then connects his lips to mine. He moans, amplifying the hungriness of the kiss. His hands are quick and desperate as they grip at my clothing. He pushes off me and begins to strip me of all the hindrances on my being

I whimper as he eagerly does his work. One by one, he rips my clothes off. He does so with such impatience, I hear the tears and the strains of my clothes.

He sits me down as he removes each piece off me until I'm left in my panties. I wrap my arms around my bare chest. Kylo leans in, hands rubbing my bare thighs. My skin pricks because of the contact. He mutters, "your turn, my dear."

He kisses me as he grabs my hands. He pries them off my chest and ends our kiss, placing my palms at the hem of his top. He lifts his hands, eyes not leaving mine, wordlessly urging me to strip him.

I shift on my knees and pull his top off, discarding it along with the rest of my clothing that he threw on the floor. My hands instinctively come to his pants, fiddling the belt on his waist band.

He gets on his knees and grabs my face. He pulls me in for a kiss, moving closer until I'm pressed against the headboard. He guides my hands as they push his pants down.

We keep kissing until he breaks away to strip all together. I don't have time to react cause when he does, he pushes me down using his Force, and brings my legs together as to rid me of the last thing keeping me modest. I screw my eyes shut as he snatches my underwear.

Before I could feel too conscious about being naked in front of the man that was my husband, about to consummate our marriage, I let out a shaky sound as my legs are grabbed and pushed apart.

I suck in a breath as my arms fly again to my chest. They only stay there for a moment. Even that, Kylo pulls apart as he presses against me. He presses my arms down on the pillows by the sides of my head.

I am unable to conceal my cries at the feel of his hot body pressing against mine. I feel his taut stomach press against my core. It drew out another sound I could not keep in. I feel my pulse against him. I feel my wetness smear on his skin. His hands leave my arms to grab onto my thighs.

When I finally dared to open my eyes, I caught the moment Kylo sank his head onto my chest and began to suckle at the skin on my sternum.

I whimper then I bite my lip tightly. Kylo looks up at me as he takes my left breast and nips at it. He begins to rub against me.

I fist his hair into my hands. I press my head back against the pillows. Kylo's hands travel to my hipbones and digs in his fingers into me. He releases my breast and checks on his work, appreciating the mark he left of my skin before continuing to attend to my breast with his mouth.

I tighten my legs around his waist as he continues to grind down on me. I feel my heart racket behind my ribs as Kylo moves to my other breast.

"Kylo," I whimper, as my nails dig into his scalp.

He moans and releases my flesh, whispering hotly against my skin, "yes, my empress?"

I exhale through my open mouth and look at him with a dazed expression. I clutch his cheeks, "I want you-- need you-" I sigh.

Kylo lifts his body slightly, one hand releasing my hip. "To what?" he murmurs, "-need to hear you say it."

His fingers roughly draw a line from my side to my core. I gasp when he touches my aching nub. I lift my head, looking out at his hand as he looks down on me. His two digits dote on the wet heat between my legs. He slowly rubs circles on my flesh, teasing my entrance.

He holds my hips in place as a squirm beneath him. Then his hands hook by the curve of my thigh and pushes one leg up to my chest. He leans in and says, "need to what, my bride?"

I whine as my hands brush down to his shoulders. I claw at him, pulling him closer to me, "need to..." whimper, "to be made yours."

He exhales loudly. He heaves heavily as he sinks two fingers into my sopping core, slowly and firmly rubbing into me, stretching my flesh deliciously. I whine like a wraith.

"You have no idea how long I've imagined touching you like this," he admits as he toys my entrance with his fingers.

"Kylo."

He pulls his hand away and grabs my other thigh, pushing it up by my ribs.

I look at him as he brings his face close and lifts his hips. He digs his fingers into the bend of my knees and my toes curl when I feel him press against me, hard and pulsing.

I lick my lips and break into a whine when he slowly sheathes himself into me, releasing a hot breath by the crown of my head as he did so.

I whimper at the feel of him sinking in all the way. I tighten my legs around him and reach out to the sheets by my sides and rip at them.

Kylo slowly begins to rock into me, groaning as he does so, "so warm, wet and soft," he grabs my hands and places it on his back, "so soft and-" he licks my skin and bites down.

I choke on my breath as he does this. His pace thrusts hasten. He hands grab my knees and push them into my chest, "mine. All mine."

He lifts himself up and ruts into me with vigor.

Soon enough I feel my mind blur while my voice lets out incoherences at the snapping of Kylo's hips.

I claw at his back with little regard for how much it may hurt him.

Kylo howls in response, quickening his pace even more, adjusting his hold on me until his position was perfect and my head was knocking slightly into the board.

"Fill you up with me," he grunts, "fill you until you're a mess, mark you until you're tender, repeat until you're sore."

I don't respond. I don't know what to. I don't have much of a brain to speak anything anyway.

Kylo thrusts into me at such a strong and steady pace, it's not long until I feel a flurry in my stomach and a tingle in my chest.

I whine out his name. I pull him into me. He leans in and huffs against my cheek, "feels good, right? I can make you feel good."

I catch his lips into my teeth. He rip away only to kiss me as he breaks me.

We pull away to breathe yet Kylo does lose his tempo. I feel my eyes water and my mouth dry over my continuous jaw dropped cries.

"Just want to make you feel good," he whispers heavily, "want to make you mine."

"Feel so good," I mindlessly mutter, "so - Kylo."

In that next moment, I feel my insides shatter around him. I let out a loud cry of relief. My fingers curl into his back as I tighten and convulse around him. My toes curl as I lock my legs around him. Instantaneously, I feel a sharp heat splatter into me and it magnifies my delirium.

I hear him curse and whine against my ear. I feel him tighten his hold on me as he continues the work with his hips, still as quick as before.

And as I ride out my high and tighten around him, only then does Kylo's actions find some irregularity. My head no longer hits the board, though my body very much still moves up and down with Kylo's movements.

As the final ripples of my pleasure calm down, so does the knocking of our hips.

When he is satisfied, he releases my hips and grabs my face. He kisses me and catches his breath in between.

"Do you want me to get off you?" he asks.

I quickly shake my head in disagreement and wrap my arms around him.

"Good," he rests his head beside mine and slowly relaxes on top of me. He sighs and brushes his nose against my head, "I want to stay in you forever."

I bite my lip and lean my face into his.

"I will write your name in the stars," he whispers, "I will give you everything in the galaxy. All you have to do is be mine."

I gulp and sigh heavily, yet I internally find myself agreeing.

His hand rubs my side, "I hope you don't get pregnant too quickly," he kisses my head, "there's so much I have to do with you first."

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babyjakes · 5 months

Text

clear blue water.

〈 disclaimer: this blog posts content not suitable for individuals under the age of 18. minors are strictly prohibited from viewing, sharing, or interacting with this blog. for more information on this blog's commitment to protecting minors, read our full statement here. 〉

event | kinkmas 2023

prompt | watersports

pairing | soft!dark!daddies!steve rogers and ari levinson x little!reader

warnings | dark ddlg dynamic (soft!dark!daddies of captive!little!reader.) dub/non-con. shower scene. crying kink. moment of nipple play. thigh riding. clit focus <33 + fingering. forced orgasm. watersports (unexpected wetting.) mocking/humiliation. praise and encouragement. aftercare (cleaning off.)

word count | 1,205

an | they have one of those big fancy walk-in showers with the bench in the back, the ones made of marble?? i didn't know how to describe it in-fic so i'm just dropping that info here lol. i don't usually write shower stuff so i hope this turned out okay :')

edit | this is written in the same au as you all over me, with captive!reader and her soft!dark!daddies.

There was no use in squirming or struggling. Any resistance you showed would only make things harder for yourself. And yet as hard as you tried, you couldn't keep your trembling body still. Perched up on Steve's broad thigh, your shoulder blades pressed back against his bare front side, you felt like a cornered animal as Ari crouched down in front of you on the sleek shower floor. A look of mock concern drew across the brunette's face as he reached out to brush dripping strands of hair out of your face.

Steve's arm was steady around your waist holding you in place, but there was little harshness to his grasp. Neither of the men were particularly rough or violent with you, but there were times when you honestly found yourself wishing they would be. There was just something about the way they treated you, with such love and patience- it felt so wrong, given the circumstances. It was maddening.

"P-please, don't make me..." Your begging seemed pathetic even to you as Ari shook his head regretfully, his large hand trailing down to begin toying with one of your tits. His fingertips teased lightly over your already-stiffened nipple, tweaking and tugging at the poor knot of flesh as he shared a steady look with Steve.

"C'mon doll, you're alright. Be a big girl and let your daddies help you," the man holding you encouraged softly. He brought up a hand of his own to begin occupying your other breast as his counterpart shifted his focus lower.

"Gonna take good care of you, sweetheart," Ari promised as he leaned his face down a little, settling his unwanted gaze on your puffy pussy lips as they sat helplessly atop Steve's muscular thigh. Letting out a thoughtful hum, the crouching man mused, "Now, let's see here..."

Steve shifted you up slightly along the length of his leg, placing a hand on either side of your waist to keep you balanced and upright. "Good, that's better," Ari murmured appreciatively as he brought his own prying hands down to gently spread your pussy lips over the surface you were perched on. A feeble whine rose in your throat as your dripping hole and clit came in contact with Steve's damp skin. "There," Ari smiled approvingly, "right up against Daddy's leg. Are you gonna be a good girl and ride Stevie's thigh, baby? Or are we gonna have to help you?"

Big, warm tears of humiliation sprang from your eyes as you tried to glare at the brown-haired man before you. To your dismay, Ari simply seemed to find your little act of defiance endearing. "Poor little girl, what a pretty pout," he crooned as he leaned in to press a kiss against your forehead.

"That's okay, sweetheart," Steve's voice was low and rumbly from behind you, "little babies need their daddies' help. That's what we're here for." Tightening his grip on your waist, he drew a faltering cry from your trembling lips as he began bouncing his leg beneath you, grinding your hips down with his hands at a steady, punishing rhythm.

Ari's expression was full of sympathy as he reached in again to aid in your torment. With just the tips of his fingers, he spread your labia back further, watching as your poor little bundle of nerves was dragged repeatedly over the slippery surface below. "I know, baby. I know," he frowned gently. "Bet your poor little button burns, doesn't it?"

"Poor thing," Steve played right along with his partner's cruel game of faux pity. "How long d'you think she'll last, Ari? Look at her, she's getting worked up already," he pointed out as your shaking legs kicked helplessly beneath you.

"That's our perfect girl," Ari hummed as he and Steve kept up their steady movements. "Shouldn't take long," he stated knowingly, "poor baby's so sensitive, doesn't take much to make her come."

Heat was rising up through your neck and face as your torture dragged on. As always, you were doing everything you could to fight off the inevitable, but very quickly you were finding it all to just be too much. The way they spoke about you as if you weren't even there, the mortifying detail they were discussing your circumstances in. The way forcing you to orgasm seemed to be their favorite pastime, the way they knew the quickest and most efficient ways to bring you right to the edge of those unwanted climaxes they loved so much...

"Getting so wet, doll. You getting close?" Steve murmured against the back of your neck as your broken whimpers and sobs grew louder and more desperate.

Ari could see that familiar look growing on your face, prompting him to bring the pads of his fingers down to rub quickly and harshly against your throbbing button. "C'mon, baby. Give it to us," he commanded, his voice now stronger with an heir of authority.

"Don't fight it, little one," Steve crooned, his voice vibrating against your ear as the horrible feelings swelled up inside of you. As you were sent reeling towards your high, the man behind you brought a firm arm around your lurching body to steady you. Just as your orgasm began tearing through you, the pressure applied to your lower belly proved too much to bear; in a humiliating moment of complete and total helplessness, a surge of warmth shot out from your spasming cunt as you gushed and came simultaneously.

Feeling the forceful spray hit his thigh, Steve couldn't help but beam at the sight of your forfeited control. Ari caught on to what was happening only fractions of a moment later, immediately sharing in his friend's delight. "There, let it all out, sweetheart," he chuckled softly as the unbearable waves of pleasure and relief continued.

"Poor baby, just couldn't hold it, huh?" Steve joined in as your overwhelming climax finally began to wind down. As soon as you left its grips, your poor body slumped uselessly against your captors' holds. Ari removed his fingers from your twitching button as Steve eased you back to lean against his broad chest, gently planting a kiss to your temple as you sat there helplessly, too weak to do anything but struggle for air through your tears.

"Shhh," Ari brought his hands to rub soothingly over the tops of your thighs. As the humiliation of the situation settled in, your cries only worsened, earning concerned yet understanding looks from both of the men as they sat there with you in the humid air. Steve rubbed your tummy gently as Ari stepped away momentarily, retrieving a rag and the bottle of body soap from the front of the shower before returning. You were too weak and exhausted to fight as the man began washing you off, continuing to offer you soft words of praise and reassurance along with Steve.

"You're okay, sweetheart. Just let your daddies take care of you," the blonde told you softly as the warm, soothing cloth was dragged over your ruined body.

"Our little baby. So good for her daddies," Ari kissed your nose, his loving acts and words only feeling like salt in the gaping wound they had once again torn open in you.

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ganondorf--apologist · 1 month

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Hollow, rushing in and frantically signing: Dad I need your help, people are worshiping me again!

Pale King: Again? That's... hmm... and you've tried tripping in front of them?

Hollow: I've tried everything! They found my clumsiness endearing, my drunken foolishness hilarious, my rage relatable—I even tried to lie and say that I wasn't a god!

Pale King: What did they say?

Hollow: They said that only a god worthy of worship would be so humble!

Pale King: That's not good...

Hollow: No shit! What do I do?!

Pale King: ...

Pale King: ... I have an idea.

—

Radiance, groggily walking out of her house, mumbling to herself: You'd think being the literal sun would make you a morning person—oh what the actual fuck?

An Entire Crowd of People: There she is! The Goddess of our Humble God! Please, Goddess, share with us your teachings!

Radiance: Teachings... right... um, be careful what you wish for? Look, I'm going to... I need to go talk to a voidling god about a thing, don't... don't follow me.

#hollow knight #in defiance of time au #the hollow knight #pure vessel #pale king #radiance #Radi: Ghost I need you to send me back in time for a minute #Ghost: What the fuck no?!#Radi: I'm not looking to change anything I just need to punch past me in the face #Ghost: Why???#Radi: Because her dreams just came true and they're really fucking inconvenient for me right now!#funny lil idea that popped into my head

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ominouspuff · 2 months

Note

I love rebel fox's ridiculously big sleeves

So glad you do — I dearly love them too. So many opportunities for flourishing and swishing from a man you would expect to do exactly neither and never

Also. You have given me the opportunity to EXPOUND and I’m taking it

The sleeve is not only aesthetic, but so EXTRA

CW mutilation: Fox’s right hand index-finger: “Ahsoka’s Gift” - In the arc where Fives (appears) to get shot by Fox, enraged by this and by her treatment by the Coruscant guard during her trial arc, Ahsoka takes revenge on the offending digit that shot the gun. With her teeth, btw — it gets a bit wild. Side-note: It factors in for the other clones that Fox is not right-handed, but that’s the hand he uses to shoot Fives. Then again, most clones are trained/raised/adjusted to be ambidextrous, so — it’s just odd all around, from the outside.

GAR armor: In keeping with the AU title and inspiration (Repurposing GAR armor towards the end of pulverizing wrinkly Sith — A guide by CC-1010, ecstatically-ex-marshal commander of Coruscant), Fox has kept his GAR shoulder-guards, a cutout of his chestplate, and knee-guards (plus one shin-guard), though the paint on them has been adjusted or worn.

Oversized sleeve: Beneath the batwing sleeve and dramatic flair, Fox is hiding whatever the rebellion uses instead of the Mandalorian Whistling Birds, in addition to an elbow-mini-blaster that fires a max of four shots, and extra ammo. (Also the sleeve is removable — think detachable bridal train)

CW self-destruction: On the reverse side of his chest-plate piece, Fox has an explosive device with multiple ways to rig it to explode. While it is detachable and likely could be used to explode OTHER things, the primary intent is a last resort gesture of defiance should he run out of other options.

Fox also has a replaced tooth (which he makes use of, but no spoilers here) and a metal plate protecting the surgery point for when his chip was removed. Since Fox is Fox, he prioritized speed over care at the time, so it is permanent vulnerability due to how his skull was treated and recovered afterward.

Do you see the knifes on his thigh they are small but they are important

#fan art #artists on tumblr #star wars fanart #star wars: the clone wars #fix it au #commander fox #rebel!fox #I have quite a few hcs for this design #but also it’ll be delicious when there’s negotiations between the rebels and the Republic and Cody (who is present as the ONLY Marsh. Comm)#Is the only one who knows what’s under that stupid cape-sleeve thing bc Cody would absolutely do the same thing #Cody: *slaps Fox’s shoulder giving Obi-Wan a look right in the middle of a negotiation meeting between the rebels/GAR/Republic*#Cody: This shabuir can hold so much karkin weaponry #Cw: mutilation (minor)#Cw: Self-destruction (hypothetical)#this is so indulgent but please indulge with me #the GAR symbol over his heart and that being the piece that has the self-destruct device is the only brand of symbolism Fox can do #Repurposing GAR Armor AU #OmPu Ask Hours

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kiwisbell · 2 months

Text

helen ; chapter two

lure the wolf

Si vis pacem, para bellum. Or, the lie.

series masterlist | my masterlist pairing: joel miller x f!reader tags/warnings: 18+ (MDNI), john wick AU, hitman!joel, husband!joel, established relationship, artist!reader, love as worship (and blasphemy), joel miller has a Reputation, flashbacks, blood + injuries, medical attention, mentions of rape/SA, cars, tommy is the rational brother, joel is an idiot, childhood/religious trauma, criminal underworld, secrecy/lies, betrayal, ANGST, Big Fight, unresolved angst, joel gets shoved a couple times, the typical alcohol/smoking/profanity, i'm deeply sorry overall for what i'm putting you through, dividers by @/saradika word count: ~ 7.1k a/n: i am... sorry. just know that i love you, okay? again, i extend a huge thank-you to @cavillscurls for being my incredible beta and listening to my constant moaning. ilysm honey. also, thank you hugely to moms @tieronecrush & @northernbluess for helping me with *that scene* prev | next

Is this seat taken?

Of all the people crowding the restaurant, Joel noticed you first.

Candlelight drowned the world in burnt orange, and he could very well have been walking into the cathedral he grew up in. A piano player expertly brushed his fingertips across the keys, coaxing Moonlight Sonata’s soft lullaby from the strings. It was fucking warm, his vest tight around his torso, weighed down by the Beretta hidden in the lining. Sweat began to bead at his hairline as he slid easily between tables where guests took their seats, relishing the idle hum of chatter while they lay napkins over their laps and paid attention to proper cutlery etiquette. Some people, he’d noticed, enjoyed having riches to spend.

Joel found a corner, next to one of only two empty tables in the entire restaurant. His eyes did not leave you the entire journey into the quiet darkness.

You, who stood straight-backed and elegant on the small stage, conversing pleasantly with three men in servers’ uniforms. You, whose eyes gleamed when you smiled, in standing defiance of the dim light.

Paintings, Joel realised, were hanging from the wall behind the stage. Dynamic brushstrokes of muted colours depicted naked bodies and desperate embraces. Blushingly erotic for a public event, Joel thought. Still, he stared, his head tilting to the side as he examined the angles of the bodies, the taut muscles, soft skin, hungry hands.

Joel spent too much time watching the dip of your throat and the curve of your collarbones as your turn to speak came and you gesticulated idly, humbly. He was here for a job. He was not here to look at paintings and a pretty girl.

And yet he watched, utterly still. The men you spoke to would compliment you, and you would place a hand to your heart or shoo their words away. A simple, fine golden chain hung around your neck. Joel should have been spending these minutes reaffirming his plan, ensuring his target was still in position. He should have confirmed his suspected exit routes. He should have done his fucking job.

But the smile had struck him, stronger than any punch he’d taken. Your smile crinkled the corners of your eyes.

You simply shone.

You gracefully slid away from the men’s attention and took a seat on the chair that had been placed on the right side of the stage. You were here to complete a live commission for the grand opening, he realised. And Joel, the utter idiot he was, sunk slowly, trancelike, into a seat at the empty table in the corner.

Joel listened to music. Occasionally. When he was in a bright enough mood to let the radio stay on in his car, he kept it tuned to an old country channel. Now, he thought he could see music in the way you painted, your collarbones the careful glide of a bow across the strings of a violin, an achingly sweet song that smothered the noise in his head.

You treated your palette and your brush with astonishing tenderness. Your strokes were deft and drifted expertly across your workspace. Your eyes flickered between the crowd and the canvas, and Joel became your reverent audience.

He had no idea how long he sat there, watching. Every rise and fall of your arm held him to his seat like there were ropes around his ankles. When the emcee stepped onto the stage and brought a microphone to his mouth, Joel watched you lift slowly from your trance. You blinked twice, took a deep breath that shifted the necklace on your throat, and loosed it like a sigh. Then a speech began, and Joel remembered that you were not the only person in the world.

Joel had made a point of studying his targets: not only the man, but the place. The guests. The owner. The blueprints and the staff. He knew them explicitly. He was thorough, and he had contingency plans that surpassed the number of fingers he possessed.

So, of course, he knew your name. He knew that you had been painting since you were a child. He knew that you donated all of the proceeds from your gallery sales to various charities. He knew that your income came from commissions.

But he had never seen your face in person until now. Joel had enough of a brain to acknowledge beauty, though attraction was something different altogether, a beast he had never quite wrangled. He could not have possibly predicted the twisting in his chest or the aggressive twitch in his fingers when you shifted off the stage. He wanted to follow. He wanted you to stay where he could see you, where he knew you would be safe, while he conducted business.

Safe, though, was relative. It meant little. Joel took a moment to gather himself, straightened the dinner fork at his place setting as though he was expecting to dine at all, and waited for his target to show his face.

The last thing he needed was unexpected company. Then, a gentle shadow that smelled of summer rain and daisies eclipsed him, and Joel looked up.

Is this seat taken?

Joel promised himself a number of things.

The problem was that he couldn’t keep a single one.

He had very few contacts in his real phone. Tommy, Cabrera, Maria, Bill. He contacted these people infrequently, some more so than others. He was not fond of texting, and he kept his phone calls short. Now that your name added a noticeable weight to the phone in his pocket, Joel had never been more tempted to stare at his screen all day and night, waiting for a message.

So, the first promise: keep his phone at home while on a job. It wasn’t particularly necessary either way, bringing it along, since he had burners at his safe houses. He left it on his nightstand once before a mission. When he came home, covered in other people’s blood and sometimes his own, he picked up the phone only to find that your latest message had come through an hour previous.

‘I’ve decided. You ever make escargots?’

The night before, you were waiting on a client and Joel was cooking dinner. He put you on speakerphone so he could stir.

“Where’d you learn to cook?”

“Taught myself, really.” He’d frowned, then. “Grew up in an orphanage. They decided what we ate.”

You could have pitied him: That must have been awful. What happened to your parents? I’m so sorry, Joel. No wonder you’re terribly adjusted.

“Where did you go after?” you’d asked him instead.

“Here,” he had told you. “New York. Good place to learn how to cook if you’ve got no money to spend.”

“Smart man. Is that steak I smell?”

He’d laughed. “Close, but no. Risotto.”

“Shit, I’m hungry,” you’d groaned. “I could eat seven steaks. I haven’t eaten all fucking day; my client is late for this meeting and I came straight from the gallery. C’mon, describe it to me more.”

“I’ll make you dinner.”

It had slipped out, a little wobbly, a deer taking its first steps. But Joel had persisted, white-knuckling a wooden spoon and glaring hard at his cell phone. “Anything you’d like. Name it.”

Staring at the text message, smearing the screen with blood, Joel laughed. Alone. To himself. In his quiet, dark home.

‘You want me to make you snails for dinner?’

He had expected to send the message and put his phone face-down with enough time to shower, to cleanse himself of blood. He’d left you waiting so long, after all. But your name appeared, blown-up, on his screen. You were calling.

“Not the whole meal,” you said. You always spoke first, knowing Joel didn’t care for the hellos and goodbyes of phone-call etiquette. “Escargots is an appetiser, Joel.”

Joel smiled, which revealed some sort of painful contusion on his face he hadn’t known about. As he palmed the tender skin around his jaw, he said, “I can do that. And what about dinner?”

“Well, that, you’ll just have to get back to me on,” you said. “Gives me another excuse to talk to you.”

With that, Joel had officially forgone the promise. He wanted to carry your name with him.

He made a second promise, to set boundaries: he would only allow himself to call you once a week.

But you, who knew people better than most, who sat with them for hours as you painted their very souls into colour and light, caught on.

“You call me at exactly eight o’clock every Monday night. You could at least vary it by an hour so I wouldn’t notice.”

Joel hung his head. “Shit,” he grumbled. “I’m… I’m sorry.”

“Joel, I’m going to say something. I want you to listen to me.”

And he, who obeyed your every command, whose marrow sang the song he’d heard that first night at the restaurant, straightened. “Yeah. I’m listenin’.”

“I just got home from a four-hour showing, and I’m achey, and a little drunk, but if I call you, it’s because I want to call you. If I talk to you, it’s because I want to. Because you’re the best part of my day. So if you want to call me, too, just fucking call me. End my misery, okay?”

He wondered how it would taste to slip his tongue past your parted lips, to feel the burn of your celebratory champagne, the crack of your whip-smart resolve as you moaned softly against him. He thought he might like to make you moan.

You wanted to speak with him. You awaited his calls. You liked him.

As a child, Joel had known God’s wrath as intimately as he had known His love. They were the two sure things in the world, according to the Sisters. They made him memorise Genesis. Joel knew love and evil existed in this world. They had never taught him the in-between, the mundane, the nuances of like.

“Yeah, okay,” he said. “I can do that.”

So, one call a week lasted less than a week, and it wasn’t a fortnight after you first met that you and Joel were speaking every single day. Your voice was in his head, your laugh in his blood. Like dissolved. He began to need.

He knew your routines, your habits. He knew how you took your coffee (milk and two sugars, sweet to his bitter black). He knew you hated pork. He knew which paints you used most, and which palette knives were best for different details. He knew you hated painting trees, but you loved rivers.

In his free time, he would visit bookshops. You loved Wilde and Machen. It only made sense—your paintings were decadent, larger-than-life, sinful. Joel enjoyed philosophy. He liked Coleridge, Keats.

“They would’ve hated one another,” you said one day over breakfast.

“You think? They were pretty fond of all those flowery words.”

“Poetry and philosophy are opposites,” you offered.

“Maybe,” he said, “but maybe not. I think they needed each other.”

You smiled over the rim of your coffee cup. “Maybe you’re right.”

A month after he’d met you, he’d rebound a copy of The Importance of Being Earnest. A month after that, he’d worked up the courage to give it to you.

“Oh my God, Joel…”

“It’s yours,” he said. “I know it’s one of your favourites. It’s stupid, I know, just…”

You beamed at him. “Just… what?”

“Just saw it, and thought of you.”

A dozen other projects were sitting at his makeshift station. Pieces of you already lived in his space.

In these moments, Joel thought, This is what I missed. There was light in you, a light that had been beaten out of him. Some nights, the dark called, and there you were, the fluttering of strings on the Eolian Harp, and he knew he was obsessed before he drove you home that long first night.

Often, the moment lasted only for the little time you could spare: a brief text, a two-minute phone call. When he limped up the stairs to his home and collapsed in the closest chair, usually bloodied or bruised or both, your name was always waiting for him.

One night, two words: ‘Call me?’

He did.

Joel had just come home from a job in Queens. The gangsters hadn’t put up much of a fight themselves, but one of them did know how to drive a car, and he’d taken a hard sideswipe to his whole body, knocking out the headlights with his ribs. He felt, appropriately, like he’d been pulled apart, his bones stretched, muscles hot and sore.

He had made his promise about weekly calls three months ago. Joel figured he must have been out of his mind then, thinking he could go that long without you. He simply could not.

“Missed you.”

Your laugh, delighted and quiet, melted some of his bones until they gently began to slide back in place. “I missed you,” you said. He quickly assessed that you were home, judging from the buzz of silence on the other end of the line. “Tough day?”

His brother Tommy was a mechanic. So, Joel had told you he worked the books. Gave him a decent excuse to be there as often as he was. Didn’t give him an excuse for anything else.

“Tired,” he said easily, “but glad to hear your voice.”

“You sound like you’ve been hit in the ribs,” you said. “Are you sure you’re okay? Did Tommy rough you up?”

Joel wasn’t familiar with lying. He’d never had many reasons to. Violence convinced people a lot easier. The biggest lies he’d ever told had been the nightly sermons, the recitations of Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Amazing fucking Grace. He didn’t like the way lying to you sat low and heavy in his chest.

“I’m all right. Just gettin’ old. Took the stairs too fast.”

“Joel.”

He didn’t like the edge to your voice. He was causing you this anguish. Fuck, he hated that thought. He hated that he had no choice but to lie. “Sweetheart, I’m okay.”

Your sigh was soft, resigned. “You promise me?”

“On my life.”

“That’s what I’d like to avoid,” you said with a laugh. “Are you back in New York?”

Joel looked down at the hand on his thigh, flexed his split knuckles. “I’m back.”

“Well, I just got back from a gallery showing,” you said. “And I want to see you.”

Joel listened to his stilted breathing punch out of his lungs in the quiet darkness, clenching his bloodied fists. In his dreams, his head was bowed as if in prayer, but his arms were wound tight around your body. The warm press of your fingers into his skin felt like the lick of a flame. In his dreams, you sighed his name and you called him yours. In his dreams—maybe his one and only dream—he kept you safe more than he put you in danger.

That was where the hopeless dream slipped like smoke through the slits in his eyes. You would always be in danger as long as he was involved in this life.

“I want to see you, too,” said Joel.

Tommy’s day gets infinitely worse the second his brother walks through the door.

“Everyone out,” he snaps, and his guys flee from the garage, letting the door fall with a clang of metal to the concrete. You jump, falling out of step with your husband and hugging your arms to your chest. Tommy narrows his eyes. “What can I do for you both? I was just about to close.”

You open your mouth, but Joel’s already working. “I need a ride.”

“That so?” Tommy cleans the oil from his hands using a once-white rag, now a slick brown, smearing it across his forehead when he wipes the sweat away. “Don’t suppose it has anything to do with the kid who drove in here with your car two hours ago?”

You lower yourself onto the hood of a nearby Porsche 911, dropping the overnight bag from your shoulder and letting it slump on the ground. Tommy watches as you study the ring on your left hand, twirling the bands around your finger.

“Shit,” says Joel, scratching his beard. “And what’d you say to him?”

“I didn’t say nothin’, Joel. I took one look at your car and decked the asshole. He wanted a tune job. Clearly didn’t know whose car he stole.” Tommy tosses the rag onto a table, next to a decanter of bourbon. “What the fuck are you thinking, pissin’ off Cabrera’s kid?”

Joel meets his brother’s eyes, a lethal glint in their brown that Tommy’s never known to mean anything good. “That,” he says darkly, “was Emiliano Cabrera?”

“Yeah, I’m sure his old man ain’t proud to share their name, either,” huffs Tommy. “I’m gonna ask again, Joel: what the fuck did you do?”

“I didn’t do a goddamn thing he didn’t deserve,” says Joel, “and I need a ride.”

Tommy’s fingers curl in at his sides. Sometimes, it’s hard not to punch his brother in the jaw. “Yeah, I heard you the first time. Just know it’s a loan. So don’t fuckin’ scratch my property, Joel, or so help me—”

You stand from the hood of the car and pin Tommy with your gaze, a bit distant, a bit icy. “I need to use your bathroom, Tommy. If that’s okay.”

He feels himself soften a bit at the sight of your trembling hands. “Yeah, sweetheart. ‘Course.”

“I’ll show you,” says Joel, reaching for your arm.

You watch the floor and brush past him. “I can find it.”

Joel’s fingers twitch as you go without another word, his eyes shuttering, and Tommy notices that his knuckles are bloodied.

“Wanna tell me what happened?” he asks once they’re alone.

Joel sits where you did moments ago, reaching for the decanter next to him. He doesn’t pour or drink; he merely angles the glass and watches the fluorescent lights filter through it. “He broke in. I killed his buddies, but he got away.”

Tommy lowers himself onto the edge of the table. “Jesus fuckin’ Christ, Joel.”

“Yeah.”

“She’s cut.” Tommy turns his head to the doorway where you disappeared. “They do anything else?”

“They would’ve.” Joel slams the decanter back down on the table, and the echo reverberates in the walls. “He tried—”

He does not finish the sentence, but he does not need to.

Tommy rubs his jaw. “You gotta tell her, man.”

“She’s in shock. She went through a lot.” Joel’s eyes drop to the floor, to the bag brimming with your clothes, and his jaw works. “I… can’t tell her. Not right now.”

Tommy is struck, sometimes, by how transparent his brother can be. He’s killed countless men and bled gold like some invulnerable god, and still, he knows nothing about himself. “Fuck, Joel.”

“I have to finish this.” Joel’s voice is the bottom of an empty well. “I need to find him.”

“Don’t,” says Tommy. “Don’t fucking finish it. Take your losses and go back home. You know better than anybody where this goes, and all you’re doing is putting her in more danger.”

Joel shakes his head. “Tommy, if you think I don’t know—”

“No, I don’t think you know. You want to lose the one thing you worked for all those years ago, fine. But don’t expect her to understand.”

His brother’s head snaps up. “And if you told Maria?” he counters. “Would she have given you a kid if she knew everything you’ve done?”

Tommy’s chest stirs up acid. “You’re treadin’ on thin ice, brother.”

“You’re the one who should be careful.” Joel stands abruptly and winces; he’s wounded under that jacket, Tommy realises. Hiding wounds once again. “You punched Manuel Cabrera’s son in the face.”

Tommy sniffs. “Kid’s got a punchable face.”

Joel is silent for a moment. “Yeah, he does.”

You appear around the corner, giving Joel and his crimson-stained shirt a once-over. “Where are we going?” you ask him.

The way Joel jolts up out of his seat on the Porsche’s hood tells Tommy that it’s the first time you’ve spoken to him since the incident. “A hotel,” he says, approaching as slowly as one might a spooked deer. You do not move, but you do not take his outstretched hand, your fingers curled taut around your arms. Joel frowns at his split knuckles. “It’ll be safe there.”

“Okay.” You’re staring hard at a spot on his chest, your voice hollow as if heard from the dark end of a tunnel. “Tommy, I’m sorry to barge in on you like this,” you add.

“Ain’t no trouble, sweetheart. You just… hang in there, hear me?”

“Yeah.” A wobble courses through your bottom lip and Tommy wants to hunt those fuckers down himself. “I’d be happy to paint your nursery sometime, if you’ll still have me.”

“Christ knows I’d be useless at it compared to you.” Tommy roots around in a drawer for a fob and unlocks the doors to the black Porsche. “Let’s get you both out of here.”

Joel claps him on the back. “Thank you, brother.”

Tommy tosses the fob to Joel. You’re already slipping inside the car with your bag tight to your chest. “Don’t get used to it,” he says. “And Joel? For Christ’s sake, think hard before you dive headfirst back into this shitshow.”

Joel squeezes his arm and slides into the driver’s seat, and Tommy watches his brother go.

He doesn’t remember much of the church, the way Joel remembers. He doesn’t remember the prayers or the beatings the way he knows Joel does. Tommy got off with a slap on the wrist, as far as things go; sometimes, he looks into his brother’s eyes and he still sees the fourteen-year-old kid, sharing a dark room lit only by candles and the picture of the praying hands, devising a plan to escape. We’ll get out together, brother. You and me.

He saw that look again tonight. He saw the flare surging up in Joel’s eyes, an incendiary promise.

Tommy doesn’t call his guys back in. Instead, he stalks into his office and makes a call.

The line stops ringing after three trills, and Tommy doesn’t wait for a hello.

“Your son is fucking dead, Cabrera.”

“First, you strike my boy.” A lion’s growl, stirring deep in the chest; he’s probably smoking. “Now, you threaten me, pendejo?”

“You heard me. You fucking heard me.” Tommy licks his teeth. “Do you know what you’ve just started, letting him run around this city like he owns it?”

“I’m the one who owns this city, Mr. Miller,” says Cabrera. “Now, I’d like to know why you punched Emil in the face.”

“Because, sir, he broke into Joel Miller’s house, stole his car, and tried to rape his wife.”

The silence stretches thin, and Tommy can hear thoughtful puffs of smoke burst from Cabrera’s parted lips.

“Oh,” he says at last.

Everyone is staring at him.

The lobby of the Continental Hotel, a flatiron at 1 Wall Street, is understated in its extravagance. The floors are a marble that crackles with the weight of every footfall. There are crystal chandeliers and a too-high ceiling and stained-glass windows depicting the fall of Icarus, Narcissus at the water’s edge, Arachne and Athena. Hubris surrounds you in all colours and shades. And those few milling about the lobby turn their heads to watch your husband approach the front desk.

Despite yourself, you tuck in a little closer. Joel is carrying your duffle; he didn’t bring a change of clothes.

The concierge, whose nameplate reads Charon, lifts his brows. “Mr. Miller,” he says politely. “It’s a pleasure to see you again.”

Joel nods. “We’d like a room.”

The concierge only eyes you briefly, but it’s enough that you feel adequately scrutinised. “Of course, sir. Single suite?”

“Double,” you cut in. You feel Joel’s eyes on the side of your head, but you persist with as sweet a smile as you can muster. The concierge nods.

“Of course,” he says. “I presume, Mr. Miller, that you are utilising your… guest privileges?”

Joel stiffens next to you. “I’ll tell the Manager myself. Nobody else needs to know.”

“Of course, sir.” Charon hands him the key. Joel reaches into his pocket and places a golden coin on the desk. You feel your brows pull together. It isn’t a currency you’ve ever seen. EX UNITATE VIRES, reads the ridged inscription, surrounded by leaves.

“Is the Doctor in?”

“Twenty-four hours a day, sir.”

“Send him up,” says Joel, stuffing the key in his pocket and fitting his hand on the small of your back.

The concierge’s voice grates down your spine, like feeling the rough underbelly of a shark. “It is a pleasure having you with us again, Mr. Miller.”

You walk just fast enough to escape the weight of his hand on your back. He’s still covered in blood.

“Again, huh?” you say quietly, your chest sluicing down the middle. “How often do you come here?”

“I don’t,” he says. “Not anymore.”

“You know, hotels are where husbands take their other women.”

Joel looks at you sharply. “That’s not funny.”

And you know it isn’t true—you know he isn’t like that—but you’ve been lied to nonetheless. The knife twists anyway.

“Right,” you say, and leave it at that.

There is a man waiting outside your hotel room. He’s squat, old, and seems to have taken on a slight hunch, but he smiles warmly at you. “Pleasure,” he says plainly. “Let’s get started.”

“Her first,” says Joel, turning the key in the lock.

“You sure?” The Doctor eyes him warily. “You’re the one who’s bleeding.”

Joel glowers. “Her first.”

The Doctor just shrugs, taking a laborious seat at the little round table by the window. It’s nearly midnight now, the moonlight filtering in through the closed curtains. Joel flicks on the light, and you blink, taking in the spacious room.

“Jesus,” you utter, mouth agape. There are two queen beds covered in crisp white linens, a bar cart, a kitchenette, an enormous claw-footed tub out in the open, and a bathroom housing a floor-to-ceiling glass shower and a vanity with two sinks. It’s big enough to host a decent gathering, let alone two people. “How much did this cost us, Joel?”

“I’ll explain later,” he says. “Let Doc check you out.”

Numbly, you sit opposite the Doctor, who dons a pair of glasses and gloves and unlatches a small medical kit. “The cut’s superficial,” he says automatically, brushing his thumb over the tender skin just beneath the knife slash. “It’s already scabbed over.”

“She hit her head,” says Joel tersely. You can tell he’s pacing behind you, his fingers on his mouth.

You sigh. “I feel okay,” you tell the Doctor. “Really, I do.”

But he inspects you anyway, shining a light in your eyes and forcing you to follow his finger and asking you mundane questions like What’s four times seven? and Who’s the president? He hands you a clean bill of health, no concussion, and you switch places with a surly-looking Joel.

He’s shed his jacket and laid it on the bed closest to you, so you dig around his pocket and produce another gold coin. Joel lifts his shirt to reveal the gash in his belly from the broken glass. And the Doctor clicks his tongue in reproach but says nothing, dabbing a disinfectant onto the wound and chuckling a little at the way Joel hisses through his teeth.

“Out of practice,” mutters the Doctor. It only makes the knot in your throat pull tighter.

“Is he going to be okay?” you ask. Joel studies you carefully, as if he isn’t quite sure how to understand your question.

“He’ll be fine,” says the Doctor, “if he keeps all movement to a minimum.”

Flipping the coin between your fingers, you can admire the intricate beauty of it. The gold is not tarnished by touch or time; it seems new. Or just unused, if Joel’s been keeping it stored out of sight. The ridges are meticulous, impervious to debasing, and you suspect that’s deliberate. Everything these people do seems deliberate.

Who are these people?

Joel seems to know. He seems to know everything. And he’s kept it all from you.

The Doctor leaves with an extra two coins in his pocket, and you’re sure to thank him as you see him out. The door closed and locked behind you, the air suddenly stifles, and the current grows warm.

You pull at the collar of your shirt and abruptly stop yourself from pulling it over your head. You’re sticky and sweaty and probably covered in someone else’s blood beneath all the fabric clinging to your body. You need a shower. And yet, undressing in front of him—the oldest, most familiar act between the two of you—is the most daunting thing you have ever done.

Joel’s cell phone begins to ring, and you’re spared for the moment.

“I’m going to shower,” you tell him, though he’s already speaking quietly into the phone. You step into the scalding shower, a lump in your throat, and scrub at your skin so hard that it’s raw and abused.

The first time you went on a date with Joel Miller, you had to ask him. He would clam up and go quiet when you teased him a little too far, his cheeks taking on a pink hue. He showed up in a stunning black suit and brought you a single daisy.

By the time you’d known him a year, you had four bouquets.

The hot water borders on agonising. You stand, back straight, facing the flow, letting it fill your tear ducts and your mouth and your nose. You let it drown you, slipping into the deafening quiet that you so easily find as you paint.

Sometimes, he’d sit behind you while you worked, those rare moments you weren’t using him as a model, and he’d watch. There was something voyeuristic in the way he could spy on your work for hours as you painted bodies in their many stages of pleasure.

You watched him kill two men tonight. He’d brought your attacker’s knife to his own throat and spilled his blood like a pig for slaughter. You always thought you knew bodies—but your Joel, your husband, knows them better than you ever thought possible.

You stand in the shower, watching the tiled wall, for longer than you should. But when you dry yourself off and dress, Joel is sitting silently on the edge of the bed with his elbows on his knees. It strikes you suddenly that this is the man you’ve painted a thousand times—often in this very position, when he gets lost in thought—and for a moment, you don’t recognise him.

He’s more severe than before. The lines of his face are jagged, tensed as though in preparation for a blow. You would paint him in shades of red and orange. You would be ruthless in your brushstrokes, and everyone would know the artist had put a sliver of her own fury into him.

He looks up and meets your eyes, and you fold your arms over your chest.

“So,” you begin, “you’re like Bond? Like, a spy?”

Joel stands, crossing the room to meet you. “I don't try to hide,” he says. “Though he didn't really try, either.”

“So, there's people who know your name.”

The pull at the corner of his mouth does not win out. “Yeah. A few.”

You make a sound even you cannot decipher, and Joel’s hands fidget at his sides. The silence descends again.

You look up at him and swallow knives. “Who are you?”

He grits his teeth. “You know the answer to that,” he says imploringly, desperately, reaching to take your hand. You step backward and watch his face crumble. “I’m your husband, baby. You know that.”

White-hot pressure prickles behind your nose. “This is the least you owe me, Joel. Who are you?”

His Adam’s apple bobs. “I…”

A hand, ghosting across his jaw, as if to conjure the words from his throat. His eyes flicker frantically between each of yours.

“You might call it a gun-for-hire,” he tells you. “I was contracted under a man named Manuel Cabrera. This hotel is for others like… like me. People who operate in the Underworld.”

The revelation should not surprise you, but the earth beneath your bare feet fractures in one seismic shift. You think of the daisies. The suits. The gifts and the walks along beaches in Spain and the soft whisper of the breeze against your cheek. You think of sleeping next to him every night, his arm wrapped around your waist because it was the only way he would sleep.

You think of the little he told you about his time in the Marines. The tattoo on his back that reads, FORTIS FORTUNA ADIUVAT. Fortune favours the bold.

You think of a gun hidden in his bedside drawer. You think of a tough childhood he’s only alluded to: an orphanage, a church, the sisters. A cigarette burn behind his ear.

“When did this all start?” Your voice is a feeble thing, afraid of its own shadow. Afraid of what that darkness will breed. “How long have you been… doing this?”

“As long as I can remember.” It’s the reply you want and not at all. Joel is looking down, and you realise he’s staring at your wedding ring. “I got out.”

“When?”

“After I met you.”

When he first kissed you, it was barely a brush of your lips, and then he was taken away. He’d frowned like it was a mistake, and when you stood on your toes to kiss him back, the gash between his brows smoothed over, and his hands cradled your face.

Don’t regret it, you pleaded.

He pressed his mouth to your temple. You are the only choice I don’t regret.

You hate how the memories crowd you now, stifling what’s logical, what’s real. You hate the phantom sensation of his lips on your skin, the bristling of his moustache. You hate the way he holds back from touching you as if it’s something poisonous. You hate his wide-open eyes. As he stands before you now, you would paint him in shades of black.

The pain in your chest yawns open into a cavity. You want to tear out the viscera and stuff it inside.

You gave your heart to him, and he poured oil-slick lies into the clean organ like it was nothing. Like it was all so easy for him.

“You lied to me.”

He swallows. Nods his head. “I know.”

You can’t help but scoff at that. “Fuck you. You have no idea. Two hours ago, I didn’t think you knew how to throw a punch. You killed those men back there, Joel. And everyone in this building knows your name. You don't know.”

And the venom tastes sweet. It tastes powerful and strong and enough to rot what remains inside.

“Was I even real?” you ask. “Was I just a cover story?”

“Don’t,” Joel snaps. “I did everything for you. You don't understand… you couldn’t understand the things I had to do to get out. To be with you. To settle down, give you the life you deserved.”

“Maybe I would understand if you'd told me!” You’re raising your voice, prickling pain behind your eyes, chest sour with an ache you don’t know. “You never even tried. You never even thought to tell me the truth? Your own wife?”

“Civilians can't know about the Underworld,” says Joel, and he looks as though he wants to say more, but you’re shoving him square in the chest—he doesn’t budge; of course he doesn’t fucking budge—and getting louder still.

“Don't patronise me,” you say, burning with vitriol, giving him another hard push. “I gave my life to you, and I’m just a civilian?”

Now he’s getting louder, grasping your arms and pleading with his eyes to make you listen. “I wanted to protect you,” he says, his voice breaking. “I wanted to give you a good life away from all that shit I’ve bled for, killed for. I needed to keep you safe, baby.”

Baby. You’ve always been his—his baby, honey, sweetheart, endlessly closing her eyes to a truth she was too blind, or maybe too unwilling, to see. And although you may resent him for keeping it all from you, you resent yourself, too, for never even guessing that something was wrong.

You feel so goddamn stupid.

“Nine fucking years.” You shove him again only to see him falter slightly on his feet, to see the helpless glimmer of tears that shine, unshed, in his eyes. You hate him for crying, you hate him for being so strong, you hate him for all the touches he’s made you question. “You have lied to me for nine fucking years, you bastard.”

“That ain’t fair—”

“No, shut up! Shut the fuck up and let me talk. You kissed me and fucked me and gave me flowers and gifts and you’ve built it all on one big lie. And you expect me to forgive you because you were trying to protect me? I married you, Joel Miller. I loved you. We made vows to trust one another, to be truthful. Did that mean anything?”

Joel’s lips crack apart like water seeping through stone. “‘Loved’?”

“You’re selfish, Joel,” you spit, your throat raw, the pressure building hot behind your eyes. “You didn't tell me the truth because you didn't want me to run.”

“Would you?” he asks. A sluice has driven hard through the resolve in his face. “Would you have run?”

The fight bleeds out of you, the excess drawn from the skin. “You never gave me that choice, so don't you dare give it to me now.”

Maybe you would run, if given the chance. Maybe you would flee far away from the dangerous man you now know he is. But you wear his rings. You’ve taken him inside you countless times. You’ve given him your soul. There is no maybe.

“You don't get it,” he croaks. “Don't you understand the things I’d do to keep you safe? Don't you understand that I’d kill for you?”

The sob bleeds from your lips. “What if I don't want that?”

Joel shakes his head. “I said no tears,” he says. “No tears, baby, please.”

No tears, he would always say. No tears for me until I’ve earned ‘em.

But it's like weights have been tied to your wrists, and you cannot lift your hands to wipe them away. Why should you have to? Why should you care to listen to him at all?

“No tears?” you shout. “You’ve lied to me all this time and you don’t want me to cry? You want me to just let it go? Fuck you, Joel Miller, and fuck you for giving me your last name, for letting me love you all this time when you knew you were lying to my face.”

Joel steps back like you’ve struck him in the face. The words are dry, blowing slightly on the air, and you must moisten them on your tongue to dissolve the numbness, water saturating a teaspoon of sugar. He does not say a word.

“What are you going to do?” you ask him. The sound of your own voice is foreign to you.

He stands silent before you, as if mulling over a million words he wants to say. Instead, he flexes his fingers, and the scabbed skin of his knuckles cracks open. “Finish it.”

“Why?” you ask. “They could have chosen any house. They chose ours. It was never personal, Joel, until you made it personal.”

You embrace your trembling arms as your adrenaline seeps, bone-deep exhaustion settling in. “I would have gone back to sleep last night,” you tell him. “I would have crawled into bed with you and let it all go away.”

A flicker travels through his eyes: like he’s been lashed in the back. “I can't,” he says. “I can't just… let it all go.”

You laugh, and it’s so hollow, so nothing, that you know a part of you is forever gone.

“I never really knew you, did I?”

He shakes his head, reaching for you only for you to pull back. A dance. “You know me. You do,” he pleads. “Baby, c’mon… you know me.”

Maybe you do. Or, maybe you used to. You knew that his favourite colour was blue. You knew that he liked to bind old books as a hobby, and that you went to used bookshops in your free time to surprise him with new projects. You knew that he was a good cook. You knew that he liked John Keats and old, terrible action movies and Hank Williams. You knew a Joel you may never have known at all.

You cast your eyes down at his knuckles, at the stitched wound in his belly. Red stains the grooves of his palms. Doesn’t he know that you just wanted to go home? “You may be doing the killing, but all of that blood is on my hands. Did you ever think about that? Do you even care?”

“He gave me no choice,” says Joel.

“There is always a choice.”

Joel traces his thumb over your wound, his eyes glimmering. He's beautiful in this light, in the way he looks a little broken from the inside. “He would've hurt you. He would have violated you.”

“What will you do when you get your revenge?” you demand. “What happens then?”

“It’ll be done,” he says desperately. “And we can go home.”

“Home.” You chew up the word and it tastes like glass. “Home is with my husband. I’m looking at you now, and I don't recognise an inch of the man I married.”

Joel chokes, giving up, giving in, his hands on your face, touching his forehead to yours. “Baby, please. You have to understand…”

You cradle his wrists like they’re porcelain, allowing yourself this final silence. “We don't have a home anymore, Joel. We have this hotel room. And right now, I just need to go to bed.”

You pry away his hands and cross the room. It’s colder here, the autumn air a balm to your skin. You begin to untuck the sheets from your bed and catch a glimmer of gold out of the corner of your eye.

Joel doesn’t turn to face you, but you hear his voice like it’s coming from your own chest.

“I love you,” he says. “I've only ever loved you.”

You look down at the golden coin you left on the table. Unity is Strength.

“That's the one lie I still want to believe.”

#fic: helen #kiwisbell's fics #joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #the last of us #tlou fic #joel miller angst #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller au #joel miller fic #joel miller x female reader #joel miller x f!reader #john wick au #pedro pascal

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peachdues · 5 months

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THE SWEET FAR THING (TEASER)

Knight!Kyojuro x F!Royal!Reader

Kyojuro my beloved, it is your time to shine again.

Have a sneak peek from my Royal AU featuring one of mt favorite tropes — sworn protector/guard x royal.

Obviously this will be super NSFW, who do y’all think I am.

CW: suggestive/horny content ahead.

Scene context: angy Knight Rengoku slips into your chambers late at night following a failed coup attempt.

He’s angry and you know why — you’d directly disobeyed his orders and launched yourself headfirst into the chaos which erupted in the Great Hall.

His presence in your rooms is daunting; a dark anger ripples off him like waves of heat roll off stone in the summer, and yet he says not a word as he slowly stalks toward where you stand near the edge of your bed.

A predator stalking his prey.

Only when the tips of his boots meet the toes of your slippers, only when you feel the blustering heat rolling off his body and enveloping you within its suffocating warmth, does Sir Rengoku open his mouth.

“Where.” It is all he says, his voice low and rich. His eyes are twin pools of molten ore, but even now, you can see the rage simmering within their ochre depths.

“Where.” He repeats, though his tone is harsher.

“‘Where what, Sir Rengoku?” Your voice is as soft as the shadows cast around the walls of your chambers by the flames crackling merrily in your hearth.

A muscle feathers in his jaw. “Your wounds,” his face twists as though the very thought of any harm befalling you is offensive. “Where are they.”

It is not a question, but a demand; one that you know spells trouble if you should answer truthfully.

Trouble that piques your interest nonetheless; one that stokes a curiosity within you that you know is dangerous.

You pursue it anyways. “I am unharmed.”

The knight’s mouth curls into a snarl at the obviousness of your lie. “That is not what the healer claimed.”

“What good is the word of a healer against the crown?” Defiance rears its head within you, eager to both rise to his challenge and to see exactly how far you can push him. “Is my word not law?”

Rengoku scoffs as he steps closer, his leg slotting between your thighs and forcing you to lean back into tour bed frame for support. “It may be so,” he admits, though the fury in his eyes make no such concessions. “But empires built on baseless laws are inevitably doomed to fall.”

“Meaning?”

The Knight’s eyes flash. “Your words are horseshit and you know it.”

He’s right and but you’ll be damned before you admit it.

“You overstep,” the bite of your glare is belied by the way you’re forced to shift your weight awkwardly from foot to foot, as you try your best not to think about the burning press of his thigh between yours. “Now kindly remove yourself from my chambers.”

Rengoku makes no effort to move and his obstinacy thrills you.

Instead, his hands rise to the front tie of your dressing gown and begin tugging, slowly undoing the haphazard knot you’d fastened in your haste to make yourself decent.

Your fleeting moment of triumph is chased away by the breath which lodges in your throat.

“What are you doing?”

Your knight — your fiery, loyal, compassionate yet utterly insufferable knight — slides a single hand between the parted folds of your robe, coming to rest on the dip of your waist covered only by the thing fabric of your nightgown.

The weight of his palm feels like a brand against your skin. “Since you refuse to be forthright about the extent of your injuries,” Rengoku says, pushing the robe away from your shoulders. “I shall have to take inventory of them myself.”

Your dressing gown drops to the bed behind you before sliding to the floor to puddle around your feet. Wordlessly, Rengoku steps away just enough to kneel before you, though his eyes remain locked with yours.

You are wading into treacherous waters, and you know you are without any raft or life preserver which could keep you afloat.

“I shall scream,” you warn, though you do not mean it; not really. You intend only to give him an out, a means to come back to his senses before the blazing heat of his stare consumes you both. “I shall alert the rest of the palace guard.”

His fingers skim up the length of your shin, a phantom caress that is a mockery of how you truly wish for him to touch you.

“My duty is to guard the Crown and ensure no harm befalls it, your Majesty,” Rengoku’s breath follows the path carved by his hands up your legs. He pauses at the knee-length hemline of your nightgown, his chin resting against the slight bend in your leg.

It nearly frightens you how much you adore seeing him on his knees, peering up at you like you are the embodiment of salvation itself.

“So by all means, call forth the Guard,” the Knight’s fingers slowly push below the hem of your nightdress, brushing against the sensitive skin of your inner thigh. “Call forth every living creature within the palace, for all I care. They will see only the Princess’s Knight, carrying out his sworn duties and managing her every need.”

Your chest begins to rise and fall rapidly as Rengoku’s fingers tease higher and higher up your thigh. “And what are my needs, Sir Rengoku?”

Your flame-haired protector only hums. “To have your wounds tended to, for starters,” and it takes everything in you not to let your head fall back with a cry as Rengoku presses a single, chaste kiss just above your knee.

But the sweetness of the gesture is undercut by the darkness of his gaze. “And to be punished for directly defying the orders of your Guard.”

yes daddy punish me —

#demon slayer #kimetsu no yaiba #kyojuro rengoku #kny #kny x reader #kny fanfic #kny rengoku #kny kyojuro #kny smut #demon slayer kimetsu no yaiba #demon slayer smut #kny fic #demon slayer fanfic

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xx-kitsune-xx · 5 months

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Fatal Allure

Leon x Reader

Summary: To save the country from a devastating war, your parents promised their only daughter's hand in marriage to the first prince of a rival country. Ignoring your own fears, you face the future you were fated to have. You only hoped that the heir to the throne would not turn out to be a monster.

Warnings: Royalty AU, Arranged Marriage, Porn with Plot, P in V sex, Loss of Virginity, a tiiiiiny bit of angst in the beginning, no use of y/n This is also my first time writing smut so... yeah, you have been warned

Word count: 4.8k

Also on Ao3!

As you looked into the mirror, you could feel your heart tighten. You looked… mesmerising. A beautiful lady looked back at you from the mirror. Perfectly pinned up hair, adorned with crystals, impeccable make-up and the beautiful gown befitting the future queen.

You looked like the perfect bride. Or you would, if your reflection smiled. You sighed and smoothed the material of your dress one last time, before someone knocked at the door.

“My lady,” you heard a woman’s voice as the door opened. It was one of your servants, Claire. The young woman had only recently joined the palace staff, but you had grown very fond of her. Being close in age helped you get along. “It is time” She said, offering you a sad smile.

For a moment you wondered if she knew what was going on in your mind. If she could read the thoughts of running away and never coming back from your face. If she did, you were glad she didn’t try to comfort you or offer any words of wisdom. You had enough of the latter from your mother. If you heard one more ‘you’ll learn to love him’ you’d become violent towards the person who uttered the words.

With a final sigh, you nodded and followed the servant out of the room. With each step, the weight of your duty grew.

An arranged marriage was hardly the future you had imagined for yourself. You had always imagined true love, someone who would sweep you off your feet and promise you the world. Someone you could trust. And here you were, about to marry the future king of the neighbouring country. Though you hardly considered it a marriage, despite the words of everyone around you. ‘Royalty always marries this way’ they said, or ‘I met your father once before we got married! And we are happy!‘ – something you wanted to argue with, because apart from official events, they spent barely any time together.

But the sweet words and assurances that you would be happy, you knew this was no ordinary arranged marriage. It was a peace offering from your parents, who were losing the war. A last resort to save themselves and their country. And they didn’t even ask!

You clenched your fists as anger once again seeped into your body. You could still run. Or try to embarrass your parents during the ceremony, to show your defiance. What would happen if you simply said you wouldn't marry the prince? Would he start the war again? You didn’t exactly know what he was capable of – after all, you only knew him for his achievements on the battlefield!

“My lady, are you well?” the sweet voice of your servant brought you out of your trance. It was only then that you realised you had stopped walking, only a few steps from the doors of the wedding hall.

You looked at the poor girl and the guards standing behind you. No turning back now. You met the servant's gaze once more and offered a smile. Once behind this door, you would have to start looking like you wanted to be here. You might as well start now.

“I am” you replied briefly, walking the rest of the way to the door. You straightened up as someone put a bouquet of flowers in your hands. You stopped yourself from turning around to see who it was, but suspected it was one of the guards. Somehow the thought of one of those big men walking all this way with a wedding bouquet for you amused you. So much so, that when the door opened, the smile on your lips was an honest one.

Music began to play and everyone turned to look at you, but you couldn’t concentrate on them. Your eyes were fixed on your future husband. A pit in your stomach deepened as the reality hit you. This was now your future. No a bad dream or an ill-conceived joke. In a few hours life would never be as it was.

The walk to the altar was faster than you had hoped. It seemed that it wasn't true what they said, the time did not stop in stressful situations. It rushed, like it couldn’t wait to get to whatever you were most afraid of at the moment.

You looked around, muting whatever the priest was saying. Everything looked dreamy, and if you were here of your own free will, you would deem it beautiful. The venue was out of this world. Your eyes swept over the decorations, the guests and then landed on your future husband. He looked puzzled, and for a second you wondered whether the same expression was on your face.

The silence enveloped the room and you could only wonder if the time had stood still. No one moved or even whispered as your future husband took your hands in his, offering you a light squeeze. The ceremony went on, but neither of you seemed to be paying attention. The prince never took his eyes off of you, whispering words meant only for your ears.

“I promise that I will respect your wishes and give you freedom.” He began, offering you a gentle smile. “You do not deserve to be trapped somewhere against your will.” You couldn’t help the exhale that escaped your lips as he straightened up again, seemingly trying to focus back on the ceremony.

But you couldn't think of anything else but his words. ‘You do not deserve to be trapped somewhere against your will’. It pained your heart to know that he wasn't mistaken about your feelings about the whole situation. Worse, he was here against his will as much as you were. Once again you felt the anger at your parents' plan.

But deep inside, a small flame of hope ignited in your chest. Although you could only judge him by the couple of words he whispered, a small promise he made. But he seemed… reasonable Unlike most of the princes you've met. Well… mostly unlike your brothers, who would be happy to be in his place – not to marry you of course (not that the marriages between family were unheard of, but this was never such a close family), but just to marry a good-looking woman who couldn’t exactly say no.

“I do.” Leon said, gently slipping a ring on your finger. You realised you spaced out again, this time doing your best to actually focus on the ceremony.

“Do you…” The priest turned to face you now. “…take Leon Scott Kennedy as your lawful husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and cherish until death do you part?”

You practised saying I do precisely for this moment, to not hesitate. To not show so many people that you were not sure about this marriage. But when it came to it, the words stuck in your throat for a moment.

Feeling everyone’s eyes on you, did not help.

“I do.” You finally answered as you placed a ring on Leon's finger. You swore you could see the priest smile. With the pause you took, he probably wasn’t the only one who thought you were going to say no.

“I now pronounce you man and wife!” He said, sounding more excited than he had throughout the whole ceremony. “You may now kiss the bride.”

You could feel the expectation of every guest, their eyes glued to the two of you. Waiting. Impatience was almost palpable in the air. You realised that up until this point you hadn’t really thought about this part of the ceremony, or… other duties you would have after this wedding.

Leon’s eyes were as full of uncertainty as yours – probably not how either of you had imagined your first kiss to happen. But slowly, giving you the opportunity to pull away, he leaned in. Though brief, the softness of his lips was reassuring in a room that was bursting with excitement. You couldn’t blame them, royal weddings were rare enough – one between two countries even more so.

As you pulled away, Leon held your hand tight and led you down the aisle you had previously walked to him, sealing your fate once and for all. As you walked, people threw the most unusual things at you, to ensure a happy marriage – from rice to flags.

Leon helped you into the carriage, following soon behind you. It was not until the doors closed that the excitement of the guests subsided. Even after the carriage started moving, you still held hands, a faint smiles on your lips.

“Thank you” you said, breaking the silence. “For what you said. I also do not wish for you to be trapped by our parents’ schemes. And… I do hope we can…” you lacked the right words, as ‘love each other’ seemed too heavy for the moment. “…come to understand one another.”

“You need not thank me, dearest” he replied quietly, a smile on his face. “And I meant what I said. I wish for you to feel safe and respected around me.”

≻──────⊹⊱✫⊰⊹──────≺

The rest of the ride was spent mostly in silence. But for the first time since you'd found out about the marriage, it wasn't an awkward one. There would be time to get to know your now husband. Preferably after the whole celebration – for now, you were just happy to believe that Leon wasn’t a bad person.

When you arrived, he helped you out of the carriage and led you inside of the palace where the wedding reception would take place. You took in the sight of the castle, and like everything you saw today, it was gorgeous. Being in another country meant different architecture, and you couldn't help but admire the big towers and high, rounded ceilings. And for a brief moment, before the joyful cheers of guests drowned out your thoughts, you wondered how long it would take you to get used to the new scenery.

The ballroom’s floor cleared around the two of you, and in an unnatural silence, everyone waited, their eyes glued to the newlyweds. Leon didn’t hesitate to follow tradition, as he took off his cloak and wrapped it around your shoulders, proudly showing everyone present you were now a part of his family and his to protect.

“My dear wife” Leon said, holding out his arm to you. “May I have this dance?” he asked as if it wasn’t tradition for you to have a first dance. The small gesture still warmed your heart, and something told you that he wouldn't push if you refused.

Still, you gently took his hand and let him lead you to the centre of the dance floor. Slow music played around you as Leon placed his free hand on your waist. He twirled you around the dance floor, his deep blue eyes never leaving yours. This could have been worse, you thought to yourself, offering your husband a smile. Though the future might prove you wrong, you were almost… glad, to have Leon on the other side of this arranged marriage. Many girls in your situation married brutes who only wanted them for their bodies. But Leon seemed like a good man. Respectful. You hoped he would still be during what happens after the whole wedding. You swallowed thickly, all of a sudden worried about certain duties expected of newlyweds.

Gradually, more people joined you, and you tried to silence the worrying thoughts, to push them deep into the back of your head. After all, respectful or not, it had nothing to do with it. There were traditions! Disgusting traditions where someone thought it was necessary to make sure the couple consummated their marriage.

“Are you okay?” Leon’s voice snapped you out of your unpleasant thoughts. Were you so obvious?

“Yeah, sorry, I was just… thinking. Or rather trying not to” you answered, letting out a small chuckle. You were quite spectacularly failing at that. Your husband raised his eyebrows, silently asking if you wanted to share whatever was troubling you. You sighed, losing the smile you had tried to put on earlier. “I just worry for the night we are to spend after the wedding.” You confessed. This time he was the one to chuckle.

“Darling,” he whispered, pulling you closer. Close enough for his lips to be right next to your ear. “I promised to respect your every wish, did I not? If you do not wish to spend the night with me, you will not be forced.” His voice made you shiver. Filled you with an unfamiliar warmth. Warmth that you attributed to satisfaction with the answer, mixed with relief.

The two of you swayed for another song, before slowly retreating to your table. Your chairs looked more like miniature thrones than actual chairs, only matched by the actual throne of Leon's father.

“You’d think he would give you the spotlight on your special day” you joked, making your husband chuckle.

“Careful, he might hear” he said in a rather joking manner, though you couldn’t help but wonder if there was any truth to he said. You both looked over to where his father was. He looked rather… bored. Sitting on that throne on an elevated platform, it was no wonder. His wife’s seat was empty, and there was no one else seated beside the current king and queen. You frowned at the distance between the king and his people. The rest of his family even.

“He’s always like that” Leon spoke as if he had the ability to read minds. “Just let him be. I think he prefers to be left alone” he shrugged and with that, it was the end of that conversation. You turned your head away from the king and turned to face your husband. A small frown was present on his face.

“How about, when you are king, we won’t sit on a platform and like statues?” you offered, noticing the corners of his lips lifting slightly. He nodded and swiftly changed the subject.

The rest of the night went smoothly. You danced, ate and celebrated like newlyweds would. You even got to learn a little bit more about your husband. Everything was going well until your mother got up.

When it came to your parents, she was always the one doing the talking, with your father agreeing to whatever she was up to at the moment. You were pretty sure it was the same with the arranged marriage. She had him wrapped around her finger.

“Your Grace” she began. It wasn’t often that she used titles with others, even kings. That was enough of a sign to know that you wouldn't like the words that were about to leave her mouth. “There sure was a lot of talking today, the prince wrapped my daughter in a cloak, but they have yet to be husband and wife! A key needs a lock!”

The king looked at her, then at you and Leon. He sighed, but smiled nonetheless.

“Then, let us bed them!” he exclaimed, and the whole room cheered. The guests began to gather around the two of you, excited to carry you to the bedchambers and watch as the newlyweds consummated their marriage. You held Leon’s arm a little tighter as some of the men began to lift you up.

You were glad for his quick reaction. Leon did not let go of you, keeping you close to his side. Much to the confusion of the guests.

“My dear people” Leon raised his hand, stopping anyone who got too close. Your feet slowly met the ground again and you forced yourself not to sigh with relief. “While honoured traditions must be respected, trust that my duties to my wife will be fulfilled.” He moved to leave a soft kiss in your hair. “We wish to be alone.” his voice was no louder than a whisper, but with the silence that had fallen upon the crowd, you were sure it had more impact than a harsh order for them to retreat.

All eyes were on the king, awaiting his decision. You'd say he looked annoyed, but that might just be his resting face. He rather dramatically sat back down on his throne, and you swore you saw him roll his eyes.

“If it is their wish” was all he said as his answer. Though a little unhappy, the guests offered understanding smiles and congratulations, before walking away to let you go about your way.

Leon smiled at you, before sweeping you off your feet himself. The people cheered one last time, before he carried you out of the ballroom and through the palace halls. The walk was silent, and you couldn’t stop thinking about the warmth you’d felt ever since Leon kissed your hair earlier. It was a protective gesture, something you hadn’t lacked in your life with your father, brothers and all the guards they considered necessary for your safety. But this time… this time the gesture tingled in a nice way, so much so that you wished to experience it more.

You focused on Leon again as he gently placed you on the bed and went to close the door. When the old entryway clicked shut, he turned to look at you, taking a few moments to admire you. The dress pooled around you, shimmering in the dim light of the candles.

Without a word, you extended your hand in Leon’s direction, inviting him to come closer. He hesitated for a second, before walking over to you and squeezing your hand. It was warm and a little sweaty, and you wondered if he was just as nervous as you were.

“We don’t have to do anything you don’t feel comfortable with” Leon assured, crouching down in front of you. His hand clasped yours in a gesture of understanding. “We can just go to sleep and figure it out later.”

It was your turn to hesitate. Though you couldn’t be sure if it was hesitation or if you just got lost in his eyes for a moment. So close to you, his face lit only by the flickering light of the candles, you couldn't tear your gaze away.

You didn’t want to.

Without a word, you leaned closer to him, lips hovering over his as you gave him a moment to pull away. But he didn’t.

“What if we… don’t go to sleep?” as you whispered, you could feel his hand squeeze yours a little tighter. Leon didn’t answer. At least not with words. He closed the remaining distance between your lips offering you a kiss. It was soft, a little hesitant at first, as if he was afraid you would pull away and slap him.

Slowly, he became more confident and deepened the kiss. All the emotions you had before were now released as you shared this moment. His hand found it’s way to rest on the back of your head as he rose from the floor and gently positioned you to lay on the bed. Leon hovered over you, holding his weight up with one hand, the other still in your hair.

“Are you sure?” he asked, concern visible in his eyes. “If you think that you have to– “ you didn’t let him finish, grabbing the front of his shirt and pulling him in for another kiss.

“I want to” you assured him, almost rolling your eyes. He gave you plenty of time to protest, and still put the energy into asking whether you were certain it is what you wanted and not what you felt was your duty as a wife. “You’re too good for your own good, dear husband.” You giggled, your hand resting on his cheek. Though the constant reassurances slowed the whole process, it made you want him even more. So caring for his new wife.

Leon sighed and nuzzled his cheek into your palm, planting a soft kiss on it. His fingers ghosted over your body, still hesitant to touch you. A touch you longed for, needed more with every stroke of his fingers that actually touched you. But just as soon as they touched you, he pulled away even faster, as if your skin burned him.

“Sweet husband” you said, taking his hands in yours, stopping his pointless wandering around your body. You brought them both to your mouth and kissed each of them. "You have asked me a thousand times if I am ready," you whispered, moving your gaze from his hands to his eyes. "So let me ask you now. Do you want to be intimate with me, dearest?”

Leon looked shocked by your words, but as soon as the shock wore off, he nodded quickly, desperate to assure you of his own willingness.

“Yes! I- I do! It’s just…” Leon bit his lip “I do not wish to hurt you”

You wanted to tell him that he wouldn’t, of course, being so sweet and cautious, how could he? But you had the impression that words would not work in this situation. So instead you moved his hands, placing one of them on your breast and the other on your hip. Leon froze, before finally squeezing the flesh under his palms. He was cautious at first, but warmed up to the feel of your body under his. Suddenly it was as if a switch had been flipped in his head and he was all over you, trying to cover every visible bit of your skin with his mouth. You could feel his hands growing bolder, clutching at the dress when it started to get in the way. He quickly grew annoyed with the material and turned you onto your stomach, his hands working to undo the corset. Or rather trying to, because Leon cursed under his breath and started fighting with the garment.

“You have to be slow” you giggled when he yanked on the corset particularly hard.

“Beloved, I will not hesitate to take you in that dress if it’s not off your body soon” he groaned, stopping the war with your dress for a second. You didn’t doubt his words and fortunately he didn't have time to prove his honesty. The dress tore in the back, leaving you both stunned. To be honest, you hadn't expected him to use so much force - you hadn't thought it would be so easy to tear such good quality fabric! When the maids fastened the corset, you thought they were using immense force to squeeze your poor insides, and they weren’t even close to damaging anything. Just how strong was he?

“Sorry” he murmured. Apparently his regret wasn’t strong enough to stop him from pulling the gown from your body. A shiver ran down your spine when it was gone. You felt… vulnerable. Excited.

“Don’t worry, I ‘m nit planning on getting married again any time soon” you chuckled, turning back on the bed. Facing him felt even worse somehow. Now you could see the way he looked at you, the hunger in his eyes.

“Good” his gaze flickered from your body to your lips. “Because I want you only for myself, my beautiful queen” with that, Leon closed the remaining distance between you and took your lips in a tender kiss. The world fell away as you sank deeper into the kiss. Once you parted for air, you gazed upon him, now completely bare in front of you.

He chuckled when you tried to look away, a little embarrassed.

“No need to be shy, dearest” his hand was on your cheek, slowly turning your head back to him. Leon smiled at you and planted a soft kiss on your forehead.

At first he began to move slowly, his fingers trailing up your thigh, stopping when he reached your clit. You let out a nervous sigh as he massaged you gently. For someone so seasoned in combat his fingers were surprisingly soft and gentle when they caressed your body.

“Relax for me, darling” he whispered, feeling your body tense up. Closing your eyes, you tried to take a deep breath.

He was everything. Slow and caring. Yet, the unknown still frightened you, even if Leon was your husband, one couldn’t just forget years of pestering about the importance of staying innocent.

Leon kissed your temple, whispering sweet nothings and promises against your skin. It worked like magic, calming down your mind enough to allow you to relax the tense muscles. His lips then trailed lower to taste the sweetness between your thighs, coaxing sweet gasps and sighs from your lips until you bucked desperately against him.

“H-husband, wait–!” you tried to plead through moans as the unknown warmth began to spread through your body. But your words only seemed to spur him on. Soon you were writhing underneath him, moaning his name out with a hand tangling into his hair as you came. Leon didn’t stop for a while, easing you through the overwhelming feeling.

When you stopped trembling, Leon was back up next to you. You didn’t see the way he wiped his lips before he leaned down to kiss all over your face. A soft giggle escaped your lips at the ticklish sensation.

“May I?” your husband asked, between the kisses. His hand was already back on your thigh, slowly pushing them apart.

You placed one hand on his chest and the other around his neck and, without breaking eye contact, moved your legs to wrap loosely around his waist The silent approval didn't go unnoticed by him, making a smirk appear on his lips.

“Stop me at any time, dearest wife” in this compromising position, his promise to respect your possible change of consent warmed your heart, successfully ridding you of any remaining hesitation. With your nod, he positioned himself at your entrance and paused, once again searching your eyes for permission, before sliding inside with a groan. He was slow, ignoring his own need for pleasure as soon as he heard a gasp leave your lips.

The stretch burned unpleasantly, causing you to wince in pain. Still, you didn’t try to stop him. You didn’t have to, he noticed your pained expression and came to a halt.

“You’re doing amazing” he whispered, kissing your wet, tear-filled eyes. The kisses spread around your face as he continued to whisper sweet encouragements until you relaxed once again.

With another nod he moved again, sliding in until he was all the way home. A sigh of pleasure escaped his lips once your hips met. He took a moment to take in the situation, calm himself down as he admired your beautiful form beneath him.

In his eyes, you were a goddess, beautiful and radiant. If the evening you spent together was any indication, you were everything he could ever want and more. He could already see how your future might unfold. As he stared at you he prayed to the gods above for you to stay by his side – a rather silly request, given that the two of you had just got married. Yet he wished it was what you wanted of your own free will.

“Dearest?” you snapped him out of his daydream, no sign of displeasure remaining on your divine features. You looked rather hot and bothered by Leon’s pause.

He chuckled, whispering an apology and placing a soft kiss on your lips. His kisses trailed down your neck as he moved his hips backwards. A motion he stopped when only the head of his cock remained inside of you, teasing you, before moving back in again. Leon set the most unhurried pace, simply extending the pleasure you experience.

Soon the room was filled with the sound of your joined whimpers and the slapping of skin against skin. The warmth began to grow faster the quicker Leon moved.

“I don’t need the universe when you’re in my arms, beloved” he breathed out, your gasps and cries thrilling him beyond measure. "My glorious queen…" Leon gasped against your lips, capturing them once more as passion overtook you. Your legs tightened around his waist as if seeking to meld into one, and Leon let go of any remaining restraint with a groan. His motions grew deeper, quicker, more eager.

You cried out in unison as you came together, holding each other tightly. Spent and sated, Leon kissed your flushed cheeks, caressing your body with gentle touches.

You didn’t move, letting Leon worship your body with kisses. They were just what you needed. Almost unconsciously, your hand found it's way into Leon's hair, slowly stroking it. It felt heavier than usual.

“Beloved husband” you murmured as your eyelids fell. You couldn’t fight the sudden wave of tiredness that washed over you. He stopped showering your body with kisses, instead he settled down next to you in the bed. His hand wrapped around your waist as he covered you with a blanked.

“Rest, dearest” he whispered. Your unspoken need for closeness was satisfied by a gentle tug that pulled you flush against his body. Amidst the warmth of the blankets and Leon’s body the consciousness slowly began to slip from your body, lulling you to sleep.

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