#also i think catwoman is cool | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

starry-bi-sky · 3 months

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fast food is the best course of action after causing a scene. ᴘᴀʀᴛ ᴏғ ᴛʜᴇ ᴅᴀɴʏᴀʟ ᴀʟ ɢʜᴜʟ ᴀᴜ

(First Post Here and Second Post Here

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Danny finds Sam easily.

She's right where she said she was over the phone: standing outside on a balcony, in Gotham, at Father's many charity functions.

("Would you still be willing to fly over to Gotham, Danny?" She asks, her voice ringing clear through the speakers. Danny is already climbing out his window before she even finishes her sentence. He was just about to settle down for the night, his ghosts would know better by now than to disturb him at this time. The Box Ghost not included.)

("Of course." He says, sounding more confident than he feels. Sam was one of his best— closest friends, he would do anything she or Tucker asked. Even if it means stepping foot into his Father's city. He drops down silently, and walks through the house's ghost shield. "Would you like me to bring you anything?")

(Sam sighs through the phone, relief leaking through. "One of the veggie burgers from Nasty Burgers would be great, with their new ecto-fries. Extra salt. I'm sick of all this rich people food.")

(A small smile pulls across Danny's face, tilting at the corner as his living form falls away to his ghost self. "Alright," he says, and kicks himself off the ground, "I'll be there in a few minutes.")

("Thanks, Danny.")

He had the bag of food with him, stored in a container he had to run back to the house to get that would prevent the food from cooling during his flight over. Clutching it in hand, he floats down behind Sam and sheds his invisibility.

Being visible and being invisible always felt different, but in a way Danny can never describe, no matter how many times he tries to think about it. It's like a gut-feeling, a sixth sense, he always knows when he's visible and when he is not.

His ghost form burns away like steel wool being lit, and Danny drops the last foot to the ground silently. In his other hand lies his thermos, but filled with plain ectoplasm — lazarus water. "I have your food."

(He brought the thermos for himself — his side was still healing from his last fight with Technus. The ghost impaled him with a broken pipe, and Danny returned the favor by wedging his sword into his chest. Technus had been quite offended by him ruining his favorite coat.)

Sam jumps a foot into the air, and her hand slams across her mouth to muffle the shriek she lets out as she whirls around. "Danny!" She hisses, her voice rising in pitch, and her eyes narrow at him into a glare. "Freaking-- Tucker's right, we seriously need to put a bell on you."

"You have been saying that for years," Danny grins, sharp-toothed and jack-knifed, and passes the container over to her. "And yet I've yet to see any kind of bell." He was going to start getting disappointed at this rate.

As Sam takes the container, Danny hops up onto the railing and looks around. He hadn't seen any of Father's other children lurking around the building before he revealed himself, but that doesn't mean they aren't there. He wasn't going to fool himself into thinking that their stealth skills were poor.

He wasn't that arrogant.

...Anymore.

"Oh you will." Sam threatens, unzipping the container and grabbing the takeout bag. "I'll get you a collar and everything, we can start calling you Catwoman." When she pulls out her fries, Danny snaps forward and steals one from the box, ignoring her indignant yell as he pops it into his mouth.

"I spent my own money on these fries, Sam." He sniffs, leaning away from her with a stifled huff of laughter as she swats at him. "So they are technically my fries. And also, Catwoman would be a poor thief if she wore a bell."

Sam grumbles at him, and takes a bite out of a handful of fries. "I'll venmo you money." She says past a mouthful of food, Danny would have been disgusted in the past, when he was still new. But he's gotten used to this... normality. So he makes no reaction to it. "How does three hundred bucks sound?"

Danny immediately frowns.

"Did you have a fight with your parents?" He asks, eyes glancing to the doors. Doors that are covered heavily by curtains and blurred heavily, decadent music passing through in muffled sounds. He shifts himself away from the light. "You only spend that much money when they've pissed you off."

Sam's chewing stops, and her annoyed expression falters into one Danny knows well -- hurt, furrowed brows, a small frown, disappointment -- and she turns her head away from him. She swallows. "Yeah." she says, quiet.

Oh.

Danny knows that tone too.

Guilt settles like a rock in his chest. He leans forward, "Was it about me again?" He wasn't blind to the disdain Sam's parents had for him, far from it. This wasn't the first time Sam had gotten into a fight with them over her friendship with him and Tucker. But especially him. He unsettled people, even after years of observing his age-mates and trying to mimic their behavior, and anyone who knew him in middle school knew it was an act.

Sam's silence gives him all the confirmation he needs, and the guilt heavies itself with the weight of the sky. Danny's never much cared about others' opinions of him -- he is (was?) an Al Ghul, they never heed to mind what the weight of a simpleton's thoughts.

But.. he cares a little a lot when it hurts his friends like this. He presses his lips together into a thin line, and forces the words out through his teeth. It sounds robotic. Al Ghul's do not apologize. "I... am sorry." But this one does. It doesn’t come easy.

Sam sighs through her nose, and turns to roll her eyes at him. "Don't apologize on their behalf when you won't even apologize for your own; their assholes." She says, and goes reaching for more fries.

It's a sign, a signal. A silent word for the conversation to move on, to change. A distraction. Danny grasps it with both hands, and makes an offended noise in the back of his throat. And like he has learned, puts a hand to his chest like a scandalized American southern lady. "I apologize! I apologize plenty."

She snorts. "Only when you think it matters." And pokes him in the ribs sharply with her fry. He withholds a wince and snatches it out of her hands. "You're about as unapologetic as they come, Danny J. Fenton. I've seen you look more sincere when you're trying to drive your sword between Vlad's ribs."

"Stabbing Masters is a very important task for me, Sam." Danny says in only partially faux-seriousness. Masters has yet to realize that Danny had no interest in becoming his son, but he had to (reluctantly) admire his persistence. "Of course I will apply myself to it as best as I can."

He grins triumphantly when Sam laughs, and she reaches over to shove him square in the chest. He barks out a laugh of his own as he grips onto the balcony railing and catches himself at an angle.

"Quit with your method actor talk," Sam retorts, grinning sharply while Danny twists himself back up elegantly. "I know you can talk like a normal person, I've literally seen you do it."

Danny sniffs, and snatches more fries from the carton as revenge. "I'm not entirely sure what you mean, Miss Sam." He says, grin-twisting when Sam rolls her eyes. "My speech has always been this way. This 'normal' you speak of, I do not know it."

She waves her hand dismissively at him. "Yeah, yeah, whatever. But if you keep talking like that, I'm pushing you off the balcony."

"Such violence, Sam."

He gets a laugh again, full of disbelief without any of the annoyance. "I'm gonna be the one that stabs you, oh my god. Pot meet kettle." She looks at him again, smiling.

Danny smiles back, and with a flick of his wrist pulls out a kunai from his sleeve. It was one of the few weapons Mother was able to pass on to him whenever she made her scarce visits. He cherishes it well, along with anything else she was capable of giving him.

He holds the handle out to her, and watches her face shift from disbelief to shock, then back to disbelief. "Then you're gonna need a weapon to do that."

"Of course you have a pointy object on you." She mutters, and takes the kunai and puts it in her purse. Danny makes a pleased hum, it resonates low in his core, and drops his hand. "When do you not have a pointy object on you?"

As if to make her point, Danny's hands twist near his side, and he holds his palms up to her, revealing the shobo he had also hidden on him. He gives her a shit-eating grin. "Never." He lowers his hand, and pockets the small weapon once again.

Sam huffs, "Of course," she repeats, "thanks. I was gonna bring a knife but..."

Danny finishes the sentence for her, kicking his feet idly and knowingly. "The security at the door?" He'd seen them on his flight over the building. It wouldn't do much in the face of the Rogues, but at least they were good at keeping appearances and keeping out the smaller threats.

He rolls his eyes and turns his head away, looking up to the ugly, smog-covered skies. There was no bat signal in the air, and while that was a good thing, Danny almost wished there was. He wanted to see it. "I saw, and I would’ve called Father foolish if he hadn’t hired help. He attracts trouble almost as badly as I do."

"Maybe it's hereditary," Sam jokes, laughing under her breath. With her fries finished, she started on her veggie burger. "At least your dad isn't a vigilante like you are."

Danny smiles wryly. It felt nice to be able to talk more freely about this. That he didn't have to hide the fact that his father was Bruce Wayne, now that Sam knew it from her own accord. Maybe he could have conversations like these more often. Even if it was limited to Bruce Wayne only.

(Even if it felt a little terrifying to know that his father was so close by, close enough that Danny could reach out and touch him. To speak to him. But how would he explain that? And with an audience?)

(He’s wanted to see him since he was a kid, and he still does. It clings onto him like a cough that doesn’t go away after the cold already has, and while it has faded over the years, it clings. His mother’s words still ring in his ears however; it’s not safe. It’s not safe.)

(And isn’t that why he faked his death in the first place? So that his little brother would be safe? Why he gave up the heirship, his home, his Mother, Damian, and his chance to meet his Father? Going to see Father, even now, would be throwing that all away. He has to stay away.)

(Why is Damian with Father if staying with Father was unsafe?)

He just needed to tell Tucker. Danny wouldn’t keep him out of the loop, he was just as much as his friend as Sam was. His eyes draw towards the door, where the golden glow of lights was still pouring through, where music was playing loudly. "Yeah, fortunately."

They fall into a comfortable silence after that, and Danny finally cracks open his thermos. The pipe Technus impaled him with was covered in a goo that Danny didn’t recognize, but whatever it was, his injury was taking its time healing. The ectoplasm was speeding it up.

He isn’t sure what the difference between the ectoplasm that Drs. Fenton collected and Grandfather’s Lazarus pools is, but there’s a difference. He swirls the thermos slowly, watching as the ectoplasm inside twists into a small whirlpool sluggishly.

When left alone, it thickens into a consistency similar to egg whites, or perhaps a thick smoothie, but reverts back into a water-like substance when moved and swirled. It was strange; unexplainable. He can understand, to an extent, why the Drs. Fenton are so obsessed with studying it and the dimension it comes from.

Sam watches him idly as he brings the thermos to his lips and drinks from it. The effect is instantaneous, a sense of relief washing over Danny as if someone had put a soothing balm onto an injury. It buzzes down to his fingertips, and when he lowers the thermos, he licks his lips and watches the tips of his fingers burn green like frostbite.

“Your hair turned white again.” Sam comments, her hand reaching out and touching the hair on the nape of his neck. While it’s not the first time Sam’s touched his hair, it still makes him tense up with her hand so close to his throat. Instinct. dan

He ignores the urge to bat her hand away, humming thoughtfully. “I’ve noticed it does that.” He says, pulling down his bangs to see if they’ve also turned white. No, still black. He lets go. “Let me guess; my eyes are green too?” He lifts the thermos again and peers into the chrome casing.

Sam nods, “Yep, but it’s only the, uh.” She makes a circle around her eyes with her finger. “The iris part. Everything else is fine.”

Danny can see that. The faint reflection on the chrome casts back an intense green. He takes another sip. It chills the back of his teeth, and he can feel his canines warp and sharpen. He runs his tongue over them, and swallows.

Sam is still watching him, her fingers drumming against the balcony railing. “What’s it taste like?”

“Carbonated.” He says dryly, before taking a large swig. He couldn’t name a specific flavor if he tried, it changed every time he took a sip. The only thing that stayed consistent was that it tasted carbonated. And slightly sweet. When he pulls the thermos away, Danny twists his body towards her and offers it out, wiping his mouth on his sleeve. “Want to try?”

Her reaction is immediate. Sam’s nose scrunches up and her mouth twists into a smile, and she makes a huffing-laugh sound. “No, thank you.” She pushes it away lightly with her fingers, “I don’t know how to explain to my parents why my hair is white.”

Right. Danny pulls the thermos away and puts it down beside him, straining his eyes to see if the rest of his hair has changed colors. Even just his first sip would take half an hour to fade back to its normal black, and he was a halfa. He had no idea how long it’d take to fade on Sam, who was human.

There’s movement from the corner of his eye, and Danny snaps his head towards the source. There’s a figure, small, a boy, trying to hide behind one of the curtains at the door. His form just barely peeking out from the angle Danny was sitting at. He wouldn’t have seen him if the boy hadn’t moved.

His fingers curl tightly into the railing, and he breathes in sharp. Sam’s smile crumbles away and she turns to see what he’s looking at. “I should go.” He says, and reaches for his thermos. “There’s someone spying on us. Don’t say anything, just look at me.”

Sam’s expression warps, twists. Her eyes widen, her jaw starts to drop before fixing itself into place, and her shoulders curl up and tense. She forces it all to smooth over, and she leans casually against the railing. There’s a tick in her jaw. “I see.” Her voice comes through teeth. “Do you think they saw you?”

“I am not sure.” Danny says. He keeps an eye on the figure as he twists himself over and grabs the Nasty Burger bag and the container. He tries not to look like he’s rushing. He is. How long has that boy been there? How much did he see? Did he hear anything?

“Father, fortunately, has privacy films on the glass. Nobody should have seen me unless they’re specifically trying to peep through the door.” He says. The boy seems to realize that Danny was starting to leave. And, his heart beginning to sink, instead of leaving, moves to grab the door handle instead.

No. No, no, no, no, no.

Danny’s breath catches in his throat, he’s hoping that isn’t who he think it is. But how else would he have not noticed an eavesdropper on their conversation unless it was someone who was capable of bypassing those skills? He told himself that he wouldn’t fool himself into thinking that his siblings’ had poor stealth. He got distracted.

Five years, five years. He refuses to let that go down the drain. He zips up the container and throws his legs over the other side of the railing, his back facing the door. He hears the doorknob click, and without a word to Sam, slips off down the side and down to the ground below.

Just in time. The once muffled music now sounds blaring as the door presumably is thrown open and the pull of invisibility washes over him like a second skin. He doesn't stay to see who it is.

#dpxdc #danny fenton is not the ghost king #dp x dc #dp x dc crossover #dpdc #dpxdc crossover #danyal al ghul au #older brother danny #first danny pov of the au! whoo!#danny's hair turns white if he drinks ectoplasm brrrrr and his eyes turn green. good for him #this sat in my drafts for the last few days until i finally finished it during class #it was a math class and i already knew the material so tis fiiiine. now i just need to finish my CFAU post rewrite :)#ectoplasm tastes like that time i went to go get pepsi from the soda machine and it was all out of the pepsi flavoring so instead i got a #cup full of carbonated liquid. it was disgusting. ectoplasm kinda tastes like that. sometimes.#danny smiles in this more than i thought he would but yk it fits. he IS more smiley around his friends and family.#ectoplasm is a weird non-newtonion fluid and danny is fascinated. its got the consistency of egg whites one minute and then water the next #its a water slime and then suddenly its as brittle as annealed glass. it heats up and rots like milk or it heats up and boils like water #it congeals. it thickens. it boils. it solidifies. it does whatever it wants. it gels and melts into a tar-like substance #how long has damian been standing there? good question. :) i almost had him open the door and make eye contact with damian before falling #backwards. i also almost had it be *bruce* and damian opening the door bc bruce found out that damian pulled a knife on sam and was gonna #have him come apologize. that would be a fun scene. prolonged eye contact prolonged eye contact prolonged eye contact #imagery brrrr. had fun playing with how danny's ghost form works. if anyone has seen a video of steel wool burning thats how i imagine #danny's ghost transformation to be like.#also ayyy balancing danny's dialogue be like “how fancy should he sound and how Normal Teenager Should He Sound”#when sam gets home she catches tucker up to speed about everything including the convos with the waynes she had and they both form the #'“Fuck Them Waynes” squad. Sam has jumped to the entirely wrong conclusion about danny's separation from his family but in her defense.#it is a pretty sound conclusion to jump to considering the lack of context she has from danny's prior home life. which is almost none at al #so to her it looks like danny got abandoned by bruce wayne

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hotvintagepoll · 5 days

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Propaganda

Glynis Johns (Mary Poppins, The Court Jester)—LISTEN, I'd let that woman's voice with all its gravely hoarseness (positive) wash over me all goddamn day, but if that's not enough she managed to play the straight woman to Danny Kaye's jester, all with her cleavage so plunging it might as well have been catapulted into the ocean right after Basil Rathbone

Eartha Kitt (Anna Lucasta, St. Louis Blues)—My friend and I have a saying: NOBODY is Eartha Kitt. A thousand have tried, and they've all come up empty and will continue to do so. Everyone knows her for something: from "Santa Baby" to Yzma in Emperor's New Groove to Catwoman to making Lady Bird Johnson cry for the Vietnam War. She was a master of comedy and sex, an extremely vocal activist, and she aged like fine wine... I honestly don't know what I can say about her that hasn't already been said, so I'll stick to linking all my propaganda. Like what else do you want from me. She was iconic at everything she ever did. Literally name another. How can anyone even think of her and not want to absolutely drown?

This is round 4 of the tournament. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage woman.

[additional propaganda submitted under the cut.]

Glynis Johns:

She walks the line between sexy and cute. Her best role for me is in "The Court Jester as Maid Jean. She's fantastic as the soft but tough captain of the outlaw band and she looks stunning in every gown she wears throughout the film. And of course we can't forget her iconic turn as the suffragette mother, Mrs. Banks, in Mary Poppins! Also shoutout to her distinctive and beautiful voice, kind of smoky and husky. Extremely hot and set her apart from many of her peers."

"She was amazing in Mary Poppins (the Suffragette song is severely underrated) and apparently she was Welsh? National pride! And she advocated for arts funding in Wales, which is very cool. Also, she died recently (RIP) making her one of the last survivors of the Golden Age of Hollywood, according to Wikipedia. Also also, she just has a cheeky energy I like? And her eyes are beautiful!"

"She had this wonderful wit and charm to her no matter the role and the most distinctive, striking voice!"

"I mean, incredibly beautiful and talented, can do drama can do comedy. And she was a mermaid."

"Like Bette Davis she has eyes to die for. Unlike Bette Davis you felt comforted by them, even when she was batting her eyelashes at you. Would glady go to Downing Street with her and throw things at the Prime minister"

"Listen, listen. I was raised on Mary Poppins and "Votes for women! (step in time)" single-handedly taught me how to be a feminist. Also The Court Jester is one of my favourite movies of all time and she is UNBELIEVABLY gorgeous, charismatic, funny, and clever in it. She knocks several men out. Absolute icon."

"I love Glynis Johns. Most of the reason is The Court Jester where she's a sensible and capable foil to whatever what going on with Danny Kaye at the time. She was also the first star I based an OC on. An OC that I still have to this day! Anyway here have some YouTube links love u bye"

Mermaid clip:

Court Jester (sharing a bed trope):

youtube

Court Jester (seducing the king):

youtube

"VOTES FOR WOMEN! Well, votes for this woman. Please."

youtube

Eartha Kitt:

"A hot vintage woman who was not just known for her voice, beauty, poise, and presence, but also her unapologetic ways of speaking about how she was mistreated in the show business as a girl who grew up on cotton fields in South Carolina in the 1930s through the 1940s coming to Broadway first and then Hollywood."

"Have you watched her sing?? Have you seen her face?? Have you heard her talk?? How could you not fall instantly in love. She makes me incoherent with how hot she is."

"She can ACT she can SING she can speak FOUR LANGUAGES she is a GODDESS!!! Although she is (rightfully) remembered for her singing, TV appearances (Catwoman my beloved), and later film roles, her early appearances in film are no less impressive or noteworthy!! She’s an amazing actress with so much charisma in every role. She was also blacklisted from Hollywood for 10 years for criticizing the Johnson administration/Vietnam War, so. Iconic. Also Orson Welles apparently called her “the most exciting woman in the world.”

"She had such a stunning, remarkable appearance, like she could tear you to shreds with just a glance- but the most undeniable part of her hotness was her voice, and it makes sense that it's what most people nowadays know her for. Nothing encapsulates the sheer magnetism of her singing better than this clip of her and Nat King Cole in St. Louis Blues, she pops in at 2:49. Also I know it's post-1970 but her song that was cut from Emperor's New Groove is likely to make you feel Feelings."

Even with as racist as Hollywood was in the 1950s and 60s, Eartha Kitt STILL managed to have a thriving career. She also once had a threesome with Paul Newman and James Dean, and called out LBJ over the Vietnam War so hard that it made First Lady Johnson cry. Eartha Kitt was talented, sexy, and a total badass activist.

#eartha kitt #glynis johns #hotvintagepoll #fuck that old woman #ladies 4

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nonasuch · 1 year

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The 2022 Miss Universe pageant was last night!

Which means: the National Costumes are here.

Yes, there is video. It’s worth watching if you want to see how some of these look in motion, but I’m warning you in advance that the emcees keep doing these shitty little rhyming couplets, and they will make you want to strangle them with one of the many available voluminous gown trains. So I’m suffering on your behalf, and liveblogging.

First up: Albania.

Sparkly flag-inspired bodysuit with train is the voting “present” of the Miss Universe National Costume Competition.

Angola. She did a fun dance on her way to center stage, which would probably not have been possible in her original costume, which was “tree-inspired” and too big to ship to New Orleans.

Argentina. This is where the video does come in handy, because without it I would not be able to award her First Contestant To Visibly Struggle Under The Weight Of Her Outfit. It’s a waterfall. The rainbow crotch area was certainly a design choice.

Armenia. I would like to see what’s going on with the bodice behind the... shield thing? but she never put it down.

Also, it turns out that when one contestant has a costume dedicated to solemn remembrance of the Armenian genocide, and the contestant immediately after her has a costume that’s about beach parties, there is kind of an uncomfortably abrupt tonal shift that happens onstage.

Aruba. Like I said: weird tonal shift! She did a little shimmy dance at Miss Armenia as they passed each other and it was clearly awkward for both of them. This is made of recycled materials leftover from Carnival, which is cool? I guess?

Australia. This is a prom dress. Boo.

Bahrain. A rare pants look! There’s a lot of detail in the headdress and bodice that’s kind of getting lost, but it looks cool in motion. Also the theme is apparently “Bahrain is rich as fuck,” so congrats I guess?

Belgium. Okay so the theme of this costume, my hand to g-d, is “the window on the International Space Station that Belgium built.” Why does this requires a shit-ton of leftover Christmas tinsel and some very awkward-to-wear angel wings? I do not know.

Belize. This is fun! It’s a good “lesser-known Batman villainess” kind of look. Like if Ivy and Catwoman co-mentored someone. The actual theme is “the world’s only jaguar reserve, which is in Belize,” but I think it’s also kind of implying that she might be a were-jaguar. Which, again, is fun!

Bhutan. This goes in the “just an actual regional/folk costume” category, which is also kind of like voting Present, but it looks like the fabrics are nice.

Bolivia. She has an entire Andean condor on her head so I’m already on board. This photo only shows the cloak, which is covered in silver spangles in honor of Bolivia’s silver mines, and is also why her condor is perched on a miner’s helmet. The dress underneath is entirely made of swags of sparkly gold beads, so the visual effect is actually pretty nice in motion.

Brazil. The construction details on this are actually quite lovely! Lots of intricate beading and rhinestone work. Unfortunately that doesn’t convey well at any distance, and also that white fin peplum thing flaps around really awkwardly when she walks. Oh, wait, she can flip it up to be a clamshell thing behind her head!

That looks much better.

British Virgin Islands. First giant flower of the year!

Bulgaria. Apparently this is made of neoprene? So with that and the rainbow stripes, the effect ends up being kind of “what if Midsommar, but at a rave.”

Cambodia. It feels weird to say “yep, standard Miss Universe warrior goddess costume” but basically that’s what this is. I do like the green-and-gold color palette, though.

Cameroon. “The baskets represent the nation’s agricultural movement.” Okay! I like how it’s giving “Valkyrie, but make it Global South,” though I’m not sure three entire country-shaped cutouts were necessary.

Canada. Another fine Miss Universe tradition: contestant who knows how to dance en pointe so she’s going to goddamn wear a costume that goes with pointe shoes, Or Else. Some nice beadwork! I would let her be the third, secret red swan in Swan Lake if that were a thing.

Cayman Islands. Sexy Blue Iguana is a fun concept! There’s a tail in back of the cape.

Chile. Sexy Atacama Desert is kind of abstract, as these things go, but I respect her choice to wear something she could walk in.

China. Hilariously, the announcer was like “This look... does not match the bio we were given, so I’m gonna wing it!” The fabrics are nice -- the satin drapes and moves well -- but the embellishments are kind of meh compared to some of the Miss China looks I’ve seen.

Colombia. This is a legit great Sexy Phoenix, but I need you all to know that her crown got turned a little sideways while she walked to the stage and she clearly knew it and just as clearly could do nothing about it, and I feel bad for laughing but it was funny.

Costa Rica. Sexy hummingbird! I think I’ve identified a recurring theme for this year. Corset and wings are made of recycled materials, which is nice, and they look well-made -- a lot of wing-based costumes tend to flop around or go crooked in motion, but not these.

Croatia. Oh, honey. This has big “my mom helped me make this the night before it was due” energy, unfortunately.

Curacao. “Meet the Fisherman’s Wife, a woman with a key role in Curacao’s fishing industry.” Okay? Honestly you could have left off the basket and said “this costume represents the beautiful marine life of Curacao” and I would have been like “yep, checks out” but now I have many follow-up questions.

Czech Republic. This is meant to be a Mucha-inspired look but uh. Mostly it’s just. beige. I’m starting to feel like all the other Slavic countries saw advance photos of Miss Ukraine and were like “let’s just phone it in this year, girls, there’s no point.”

Dominican Republic. “This costume recognizes the importance of birds in Dominican culture.” They did make it with silk feathers, which I appreciate, because it would have been very weird to use real ones with that mission statement. Also I like her headdress, and the giant feather fans are a good way to nod in the direction of wings without the hassle of actually wearing wings.

Ecuador. This looks good in motion! She did some dancing onstage that worked well, and there’s a great sculpted Inca head scowling on the back of her headdress. This is still only a few notches above voting Present, though.

El Salvador. “History of Currency,” which is definitely a concept! The Bitcoin wizard staff is sure something.

Equatorial Guinea. A perfectly nice entry in the “actual regional costume” category, but on the video I was like “oh, yikes, her headdress is really wobbly” and then it FELL OFF and I felt so bad for her.

Finland. “Spirit of the Forest”? Fuck off, that’s a prom dress. Boo.

I’m going to pause here so this readmore doesn’t get completely out of control. Shit, there are 50 more of these? Well, I have only myself to blame.

#miss universe #miss universe national costume

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howtofightwrite · 11 months

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Just a casual question: What lightsaber style do you prefer out of one-handed, two-handed, double-bladed or dual wielding?

We’ll leave out the Lightsaber Forms from the EU, because they are inconsistently defined between sources.

No, no, no. You ask me what my favorite lightsaber is, you get the answer whether you want it or not. The answer may surprise you. It’s (probably) considered the second dumbest lightsaber weapon ever invented in the extended universe with the exception of the lightsaber nunchaku.

Are you ready? Do you have your guesses?

The Lightwhip.

The chosen weapon of Dark Ladies of the Sith and the Nightsisters of Dathomir back when the Sisters weren’t all dark side practitioners and rode rancors.

(This is my favorite. For reference, Starke’s favorite is single blade Form IV: Ataru. He’s boring.)

Now, I agree with the general fandom that the lightwhip is a dumb, impractical weapon that’s more likely to dismember its wielder than it is their opponent. Only someone with a high level of skill, prescience, and telekinesis could make effective use of a lightwhip’s dismemberment murder frenzy without killing themselves. Fortunately, that’s exactly the base level of skills most Force sensitives possess. Probably most important, the lightwhip is the exact sort of dumb we see with real weapons in the real world. This includes the more wild examples like the urumi, the chain whip, and the three-section staff. And, it should be said, I have watched living black belts concuss themselves with the three-section staff while trying to figure out how to use it. All for the Rule of Cool. So, while I accept its impracticality, I refuse the argument that the lightwhip being any more unrealistic in use or invention than the rest of the lightsaber weapon family. Does it have a high skill floor? Absolutely. Is it a safe weapon compared to the rest of its very dangerous family? Absolutely not. Would a student potentially dismember or murder themselves learning to use it? Yes, and that’s why it’s fun. (I’ll add a small caveat that the average student could also dismember themselves with a normal lightsaber, so this isn’t just a danger posed by the lightwhip.)

The lightwhip is a weapon of the Dark Side. Its battle style would be (and should be) wild, chaotic, and nigh uncontrollable. There’s no way to use it safely and it belongs in the hands of a wielder who is straight up thrilled to cut down both their allies and enemies in equal measure. This is the weapon of a murderous lunatic in black leather, and gets even more wild when it switches to a Cat o’ Nine to bring on nine weaving laser tendrils instead of just one. The lightwhip is the sexy Catwoman reference that transcends its genre when we really start to think about how intimidating it’d be to see that thing on the battlefield in the hands of a novice and, especially, an expert.

The standard use for a whip in the real world is as a support tool for your primary weapon, such as a rapier. The whip doesn’t do much damage on its own, leaving only small, painful cuts and lacerations so it transitions into a means of harassment. The advantage of the whip is that it attacks at odd, circular angles which are difficult (if not impossible) to block and will curve into a strike around the opposing weapon. The rippling movement makes it difficult to see and even more difficult to predict. If kept in constant motion, this difficulty triples because the disparate movements blend together.

Now, take this setup and add the lightshow. Instead of a weapon that does light lacerations, we have a weapon that deals massive burns if it doesn’t straight up dismember. It will cut through everything and everyone. Conventional fighting styles fall apart against it. More importantly, because it is a burning plasma ribbon, it doesn’t need to follow the standard rules of physics. The lightwhip is beautiful in its raw, chaotic brutality, it’s high risk, high reward nature, and I love the way it hard counters the standard philosophy of lightsaber combat with a literal curveball. Any opponent who faces it is forced into new, creative approaches for their very survival.

Lastly, I love what the lightwhip says about its wielder as an expression of their vicious, ferocious, highly aggressive personality. This weapon requires commitment and dedication. It’s absolutely fair to say the person who wields a lightwhip has a fanatical, if not suicidal, bent. After all, they’d willingly risk death to master it. They love destruction. They don’t care about outside consequences or property destruction. They go it alone.

I’ll admit the lightwhip’s true potential is too violent for most of Star Wars and, like most Star Wars weapons, it very much lives on the Rule of Cool. One of the sadder aspects with the lightwhip is that, while I love the weapon and its potential, any discussion of it gets mired in sexism. Every appearance of the lightwhip comes with the sexy NSFW Dark Side Dominatrix bent and leads to the lightwhip not being given the consideration it’s potential deserves.

My favorite saber is Darth Maul’s saber staff from The Phantom Menace, because versatility allows for use of both one and two. My favorite lightsaber form (which should now surprise no one) is Form VII: Vaapad.

All that said, I do enjoy a good Dark Side Dominatrix as much as I enjoy a moody and hooded Dark Side Goth. And I genuinely love dumb and, seemingly, impractical weapons when the reward justifies their risk. If there’s a general writing advice takeaway here, always consider the practicality of an impractical but cool weapon, address i’s rewards as well as its risks, and pair it with a suitable personality. The lightwhip is not a weapon that belongs in the hands of a Jedi or, really, any individual who possesses any degree of restraint. It’s for a character who merrily expresses raw, raging power at every opportunity and willing to risk destroying themselves along with everyone else for victory.

There’s a weird angle with the Star Wars EU where they tried to establish the lightwhip as weaker than the lightsaber (*cough* woman’s weapon *cough*) with less cutting power even when it doesn’t use a physical cord, which makes absolutely no sense. The lightsaber is the more versatile weapon, while the lightwhip is more specialized and circumstantial. Which fits with the patterns of real world weapons technology.

This a long circle round to saying that the weapons we choose for our characters act as personality tells. Which is why it’s important to give a lot of thought and consideration to any weapon’s historic use and purpose before attaching it. Weapons communicate more than we might expect, both via their situational viability and associated cultural myths. It’s important to choose whether you’ll address this, especially if you’re not planning to intentionally communicate that message or make those personality traits part of the character’s identity. Weapons are tools and, like with all tools, different tools attract different personalities. In fiction, we the authors often decide this from an external perspective. Once a choice has been made, always give yourself a chance to think about it from a character’s internal perspective. Why did Character X choose this weapon? Why do they want to use it? What does this weapon do for them that another weapon doesn’t? Or, what makes that other weapon less attractive?

You might find yourself with an answer or story beat you hadn’t previously considered.

Food for thought.

-Michi

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#star wars #lightsabers #michi answers #writing advice #writing reference #writing tips #how to fight write

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weebsinstash · 8 months

Note

On the other hand, being someone who is chill with being average and a little weird is pretty comforting, albeit not as relatable or drama material. Like you have those insanely smart adopted family members, who are brooding, cool, fight crime, are insanely smart, privileged, rich and accomplished meanwhile Batsis is like,

"I watched some cool True Crime documentaries and helped Albert- Alfred with the laundry. Sorry about your shirt, Damien, added too much bleach. By the way, look at this drawing I made with a following a Bob Ross tutorial on YouTube! Looks kinda wonky but I made it myself, kinda proud of it. No mistakes, just happy accidents. Haha! :)"

By the very next morning Bruce has that shit framed on either on his desk or on the wall in his office and smiles every time he looks at it. Damian is examining the painting, "ah I see--" and waxing poetic about the different little experiential painting techniques you used on the canvas, Dick and Jason and the rest tease you about getting an exhibit at the Gotham art gallery

Like don't get me wrong I tend to write Reader inserts who are typically average (although I'd like to write a few more power fantasies lol) but I just. I feel like any feelings of inadequacy would be amplified by living with this family. For example, I get anxiety and guilt sometimes just knowing if a large or expensive gift has been gotten for me, feeling guilt about it. Just your every day to day life in the Wayne manor would occasionally be filled with all kinds of large and small splendors. A small walk through the house, passing under the crystal chandelier in the grand lobby. A weekly family dinner with actual silverware handed down for generations. Just the ever looming watchful eye of a literal actual butler, a trained professional butler who's been in service for this family almost his entire life

If anything else, I feel like you'd want to contribute in some way. Help around the house, help as a vigilante, do SOMETHING to "pay them back" which Bruce doesn't want to hear any of and also like. Realistically, if we're saying he's full yandere and you're either his adopted kid or a platonic family member or like even a romantic partner, and he's getting you gifts and taking you on trips and stuff, like. The amount of money being spent on you is a figure you will never in your life be reasonably able to pay back and it would STILL be pocketchange to him

You're just like have PANIC ATTACKS out of guilt and shame and you mention the money to Bruce and he's like "oh that? Psssh" like it's. It's nothing to him. It's more money you could make in your entire lifetime and it's nothing to him

Hey, here's a somewhat related and juicy idea. Recently I was thinking of a concept where Reader is a Gotham vigilante, educated and maybe from a well-off family but like, middle class suburbia kind of wealth, not billionaire Bruce Wayne rich. You eventually find yourself catching the eye of both him AND Catwoman and, kind of actually start having a rapport with both of them. You bump into each other on a mission, help each other out, are impressed with each other's work, and suddenly you're bumping into them out on patrol a lot more. Catwoman starts being openly flirtatious with you while Bat simply just, his shift in demeanor is more subtle for people who aren't familiar with him but. Essentially he actually talks to you now, he won't just be silent and mechanical, he'll communicate and banter and make small talk rather than just ordering you around and speaking solely about the current task at hand or future missions.

I picture everyone on a rooftop in the middle of a stakeout and it eventually becomes small talk to pass the time as you almost do a double take when THE Batman starts making idle chit chat with you (really more of you AND Cat, but you being included at all is kind of an honor, really). He's just looking through his binoculars and without moving "any plans for the rest of the evening" and Catwoman looks at her nails and he sees her throw a very obvious Look over to you "well there's a stray little kitty in my neighborhood I've been meaning to scoop up" and she's been calling you Kitty/Kitten so this whole convo has a double meaning for fucking you OR kidnapping you at this point, and you're just like, in full professional mode replying without any hint of sarcasm "that's good, a lot of people don't recognize the dangers of outdoor cats and the significant ecological impacts they can have on their local environments" and Batman is repressing a smirk as Cat is huffing because oh my god now she has TWO dense cuties to look after 😩 (bonus scene where Bruce catches you smirking and realizes you were politely putting her off or at the very least trying to make her focus on the mission and he smiles to himself about what a clever little jokester you are)

Basically the two of them start deciding they want you to be the filling in that BatCat sandwich and just. Imagine they're trying to seduce you and taking their clothes off and Bruce takes off his mask and you're just like "Whoa whoa whoa hold up, BRUCE WAYNE?" And like. YOU INSTANTLY HATE HIM, the switch FLIPS. You either have extremely personal beef with him like his company laid off a parent of yours and sent your family into poverty, or you just like, legitimately ethically hate him as a person, as this billionaire playboy. Like imagine the disgust if he kisses you as Batman and you think it's so hot and romantic and later on its revealed he's Bruce Wayne, who is notoriously An Enormous Manwhore who has kissed like tons and tons of women and been in all these love scandals. I'd feel GROSS?

Like literally you'd go from "oh my god Batman 🥰 he's so cool and dark and mysterious, I have so much respect for him, he works so hard, he's so smart, not everyone can do what he does" to "of fucking course it would be someone like you. Billionaire running around with his custom-made toys. Of course it's you, who else could AFFORD all this shit? No wonder the police just let you do whatever, you could just pay them off anyways! You'd never be arrested and go to jail and be punished like the rest of us, for anything! Of course you're running around in a suit beating people up, men like you always think they can just do whatever they want!!"

Like imagine you were literally about to fuck both of them and you take one look at their faces, "you're a billionaire and you're a millionaire" and just. Leave. Like they're both shocked and appalled because you just DROP THEM for stuff they kinda basically can't control (although a lot of it is like ethics of what they do and have they gain their wealth) and suddenly they're, showing up at your place of employment for lunch or a day-trip, you're trying to do hero patrols alone and one or both of them pops up to try and invite themselves along to qhayever you're doing (which would especially suck because like, Batman specifically could probably do everything you're doing and better so I imagine working in front of him would be extremely nerve-racking. You're just like trying to rewire a circuit board to hack a door and he just points over your shoulder "actually it's that wire" kind of shit and you have to either let him follow you or look like a massive asshole as you tell him to fuck off, which he might even refuse to do, stating that if this is to save lives or whatever then you need his help

Like legit, Vigilante Reader feels like these two rich freaks have basically been toying with you like some kind of pet and in an attempt to cut them out of your life you drive them to actually dig their claws deeper. Bruce meets Selina for coffee to decompress and he's all "so what have you been up to" since she's got this odd little smirk, "oh ive been feeling just awful lately about this little kitty running around all lonely in my nsighborhood so i just HAD to adopt them" and she just hands him her phone with a picture on it and it's. You with a little diamond studded collar that says something dehumanizing like Kitty or Kitten or Baby on it while you've clearly been crying and are maybe even visibly restrained and Bruce is just like "🙄 Selinaaaaa.... can I come visit to 😳 see this cat tho"

#yandere batman #yandere x reader #personally i think being fucked by both of them would be a religiois experience but also intimidating as fuck #man i got some ideeeeas for being caught between these two #yandere stuff #sinprompts

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anxiousnerdwritings · 10 months

Note

Hi I’m new here anyways I had an ask for a cool idea i have, what about yandere platonic batfam with a darling who can shapeshift into a cat? And maybe on occasion they’ll do it to sneak out and the batfam panicks while cat darling is just…chilling with the other cats in Gotham lol

I love the thought of the Batfam fighting amongst each other over their darling as they often do and the Reader just not wanting any part of it as they shapeshift and casually walk away in their cat form. Only for the family to freak out when they find their darling missing. Meanwhile, Shapeshifter!Reader heads off to their safe place away from their chaotic ‘family’ and it ends up being Catwoman’s place. That’s where most of the strays go after all and Selina takes such good care of them. Also, you can’t tell me the Reader wouldn’t end up being or becoming Selina’s little protégée.

It’s funny to think that it takes the batfamily a while (too long) to realize that their darling is not only a shapeshifter but also has been sneaking out without their knowledge. Like, you can’t tell me that when the family has found their darling gone when they weren’t permitted to leave the manor and are going around freaking the absolute fuck out that the Reader hasn’t totally gaslit them into thinking they were going crazy due the Reader slyly sneaking back in without anyone realizing and acting like they were home all along. Shapeshifter!Reader has plenty of little crooks and crannies to sneak in and out of all around the manor and they utilize the shit out of them.

#anxious answers #yandere batfamily #yandere catwoman #yandere selina kyle #yandere batfamily concept #yandere dc concept #yandere concept

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millylotus · 1 year

Text

“You Taunt Me, I Chase You” “You Catch Me, Then Let Me Go” They Do It Again The Next Day

Bat x Cat

Catwoman has a Kitten following her around, and that Kitten just so happens to like messing around with Batman's Sunshine Birdy.

Maddie and Jack decide that Danny is spreading himself too thin between school and dealing with Ghosts and the GIW, also the excessive bullying is not helping at all. So they decide to send him to live in Gotham with Jack's cousin Selina Kyle. Danny's not extremely happy about this arrangement, but at least Jazz is going to Gotham University, and Sam and Tucker promise to visit during breaks. Selina is unsurprisingly, really cool and it gets even better when she's fine with the whole half-dead thing Danny has going on. One night Danny catches her coming back from a hunt and begs her to take him with her. After a few weeks of training Danny takes his first night on the town, and immediately bumps into Signal, who he may or may not have called hot once.

CLASS SCHEDULES

BOTH

BLOCK 1 | MR.LOGGE - Algebra 2 Teacher : Riko

BLOCK 5 | MRS.WILLIAMS - Spanish 3 Teacher : Darcy

BLOCK 6 | MR.LE'STROD - P.E. Coach : Izzy, Troy, Dre

DUKE

BLOCK 2 | MS.KITSON - CP Physics Teacher : Izzy

BLOCK 3 | MRS.O'BRIAN - AP US history Teacher : Dre

BLOCK 4 | MR.CHAKRABORTY - AP English Teacher : N/A

DANNY

BLOCK 2 | MX.REAGAN - US history Teacher : N/A

BLOCK 3 | MX.LERROY JENKINS - AP Chemistry Teacher : Darcy

BLOCK 4 | MS.CHAU - English 3 Teacher : Troy

Jack and Selina are cousins on their moms’ side, they're parents were siblings, Selina's mom drifted away from the family.

They’ve never really talked to each other beyond a family gathering or two

Jack is vaguely aware that Selina isn’t really on the right side of the law, but who’s he to judge The Fenton family has never really been on “The Right Side” of the law

But Selina is surprised when she gets a call from Jack asking her to watch out for his daughter who’s going to Gotham U that year

And even more surprised when he calls her a week later asking if she could take care of his son while he stays in Gotham

Selina ends up agreeing but is definitely scepticall

[AN: The script kinda cuts off at the end so warning]

FIRST MEETING - DUSK

The sun is setting and DUKE has had a long day of patrolling Gotham under the sunlight.

DUKE sighs as he stretches near the ledge of a building, they need to get back to cave soon, do some homework, sleep. God Sleep would be wonderful.

DUKE’S shine golden for a second, and the vigilante moves quickly to the side baton up and ready to strike the person who’d attempted to attack him.

DANNY :

Whoa, okay no sneaking up on you then.

DUKE stared at the other boy. He wore a cowl that looked exactly like SELINA’S, the same with the rest of his outfit. Although it was accented with a more neon green then SELINA’S dark emerald green.

DUKE :

Who are you

DANNY :

What you can’t tell, I think it’s pretty obvious

His voice was light and teasing, he flexed his hands and claws popped out of his fingers.

DUKE :

Some wannabe Catwoman fanboy.

DUKE says sarcastically. The Catboy made an offended sound similar to a hiss even.

DANNY :

I’m not a wannabe!

The Catboy grumbled before calming himself.

DANNY :

I’m actually working with Catwoman I’ll have you know. I’m her apprentice.

DUKE :

(Sarcastically)

Oh really, so she’s just got you up here talking to me for no reason?

The Catboy grinned, DUKE did not like that one bit.

DANNY :

I actually do have purpose for being here.

DUKE immediately started looking around the area, and spotted SELINA crouching a few buildings away with a duffle bag over her shoulder and one next to her.

DANNY :

As a distraction

The Catboy kicks DUKE in the chest when he isn’t looking. Quickly moving away from the vigilante now on the ground.

DANNY :

By the way, the names Kitten, nice meeting you Babe

KITTEN runs quickly over to SELINA and takes the duffle bag next to her, he turns back and waves tauntingly at DUKE, sticking his tongue out at him.

The two Cats run off into the distance.

DUKE :

(Frustrated/Annoyed)

Oh mother fucker

BRUCE is so going to scold him for letting that happen and, DUKE just knows his siblings are going to endlessly tease him about KITTEN.

The Vigilante gets up and begins his way back to the Batcave.

SCENE TWO - CONTINUOUS

SELINA and DANNY return to SELINA’S apartment through the window. DANNY collapse on the couch, surprising the cats, SAPPHIRE, a blue eyed fluffy white cat, jumps on top of DANNY’S back. DANNY groans.

SELINA picks up SEKHMET, a dark grey Lykoi cat with big ears.

SELINA :

Hello my baby, did you miss you mama?

SEKHMET meows at SELINA happily.

SELINA :

Hon could you got put our hunt away please.

DANNY groans loudly but gets up and moves the duffle bags into SELINA’S bedroom then behind the secret bed door into the vault room. He began to pull out the jewelry from the duffle bags, laying them out carefully on top.

As he works SELINA walks in, holding SEKHMET and with SAPPHIRE following and winding between her legs.

SELINA :

So... How was your little chat with Signal

DANNY :

Pretty normal I guess, he’s jumpier than I thought he’d be

SELINA :

(Teasing)

Didn’t I warn you about that

DANNY :

(Mumbling)

Maybe

SELINA laughs, and DANNY grumbles.

SELINA :

Notice anything... nice?

DANNY’S face flushes.

DANNY :

Nope, nah, everything was just normal!

SELINA :

Oh really

DANNY :

Yupyup, oh would you look at that! Finished laying out the jewels, better got to sleep!

DANNY gets up and walks stiffly out of the vault blushing aggressively. SELINA smirks playfully.

DANNY :

As you said Auntie sleep is important!

SELINA :

It’s alright if you think he’s pretty Danny! I’ll put in a good word with Bats for you!

SELINA yells after DANNY as he retreats to his bedroom.

DANNY :

Goodnight Selina!

SELINA :

Who knows, maybe I’ll have a nephew-in-law by the time you graduate!

DANNY slams the door behind him as SELINA cackles.

I DON’T HAVE A CAT THING! - CONTINUOUS

DUKE drives back into the Batcave, propping up his bike on its kickstand, pulling off his helmet. He dejectedly walks over to lockers where TIM is still getting ready to go out.

TIM :

So how was patrol?

DUKE groans loudy, hitting his head against the locker.

TIM :

Damn that bad?

DUKE lifts his head and nods.

DUKE :

Catwoman has an apprentice now.

TIM pause and stares at DUKE in shock.

TIM :

Bullshit.

DUKE :

He calls himself Kitten and he’s a fucking asshole

TIM raises an eyebrow

TIM :

An asshole you saw? What was he like?

DUKE :

Checky, he got me distracted long enough for Selina to steal like a third of the Jewels on Rock Street. Then he kicked me and then just ran off, can you believe that!

TIM grins, as DUKE rants about KITTEN not paying attention to his brother.

TIM :

Uh huh, what else?

DUKE :

He had this stupid smile and was all snarky and he looked sooo proud of himself for getting one over me. Then he called be “Babe '' before he ran, and just AUGH!

TIM smiles widens.

TIM :

Oh you’re down bad.

DUKE :

What?

TIM turns away from DUKE and to the rest of the cave.

TIM :

Selina’s got a kid and Duke has a crush on him!!!

DUKE’S face morphs into betrayal and he tackles TIM who’s laughing.

The others in the cave start yelling about the whole situation.

JASON :

What!

DICK :

Say sike right now!

STEPH :

Furry!

DAMIAN :

Thomas your standards!

BRUCE :

Selina has a what now!

DUKE whines and lets go of TIM. TIM gets up and drags DUKE to the center platform of the Batcave at the Batcomputer.

TIM :

I got him!

The others had gathered in the central platform, half dressed for patrol.

BRUCE :

Duke, could you explain please?

DUKE stands up properly and walks over to the Batcomputer and attaches his cam footage to it.

DUKE :

I was getting ready to finish up my last round of patrol when Kitten tried to jump me.

DUKE forwards the footage to the moment, pausing on a clear from of KITTEN’S face.

DUKE :

He said something dumb, I called him a “wannabe Catwoman fanboy” he got offended and said he’s Catwoman’s apprentice. I ask him what he’s doing, I realize he’s a distraction, next thing I know I’m on the ground and he and Selina are gone.

As DUKE speaks he fast-forwards through the footage to the last clear frame of KITTEN and SELINA running off.

CASS “SIGNING” :

Did he just call you Babe?

DUKE :

That is completely unimportant

TIM :

Oh I think it’s important

TIM slips past DUKE and rewinds setting the footage to it’s proper speed.

DIGITAL DANNY :

By the way, the names Kitten, nice meeting you Babe

JASON :

Damn Duke, didn’t know you’d be the one to inherit B’s cat thing

DUKE :

I do not have a “Cat Thing”!

DICK :

Keep lying to yourself Tommy, we all know how that ended for Bruce

BRUCE :

I don’t have a “Cat Thing”

DAMIAN :

Father don’t lie, you’re not very good at it

STEPH :

Ten bucks says we find them somewhere they shouldn’t be in two weeks.

CASS :

I say four, deal

DUKE :

Stop betting on my relationship with the Catboy!

CASS “SIGNING” :

When did we ever say we were talking about you and Kitten?

STEPH :

Thinking about your Catboy that much ‘ey Tommy?

The rest of the sibling begin to laugh and DUKE groans in annoyance. BRUCE pats his son’s shoulder in condolences.

BRUCE :

(Teasing)

It’s alright, just remember to clean your clothes regularly, cat hair is difficult to get out of Kevlar.

DUKE looks up at BRUCE in both disgust and betrayal. Before stomping away to the lockers

DUKE :

I hate you all!

The rest of the family laugh as he leaves.

SO GOTHAM’S A BIT WEIRD? - THE NEXT DAY/MORNING

DANNY stands outside of Middletown High staring up at it’s front building before sighing and making his way inside. There aren't that many people, just the front desk lady MS.CARTER. DANNY walks up to her.

DANNY :

Uh Hi,

MS.CARTER :

Hello

DANNY :

I’m, I’m the new student. Or like one of the new students I’m not sure.

(Awkward Laugh)

MS.CARTER :

(Sigh)

Alright, what’s you’re name?

DANNY :

Daniel Fenton.

MS.CARTER opens the filing cabinet under her desk. Moving some things around before pulling out a small folder.

MS.CARTER :

It’s a gold day so you have 1st 2nd and 2rd block today. Tomorrow is a gray day when you’ll have your last three blocks.

MS.CARTER hands DANNY his schedule and a school planner, DANNY stares at his schedule, reading through everything.

MS.CARTER :

Since you’re an Outsider you’ll have to attended the safety seminars, and read through this pamphlet.

MS.CARTER pulls out the procedure pamphlets.

MS.CARTER :

How long have you been living in Gotham?

DANNY :

About five weeks now, why?

MS.CARTER :

Did you get all your vaccines for Gotham specific aliments?

DANNY :

Yup, I got the Ivy ones, the smaller doses for the Fear gasses. Much smaller ones for the Laughing gasses. Bunch of the other I can’t name.

MS.CARTER :

You’ll want to know their names, understand.

MS.CARTER gives DANNY another pamphlet.

MS.CARTER :

This has everything you’ll need to know about the vaccine you could need and even some you might not.

DANNY :

Is that everything I’ll need to know?

MS.CARTER :

If need be you can change your schedule within the next few days, but you won’t have much freedom with it considering that you came in later in the school year.

MS.CARTER :

Also your first class is on the second floor in the green hallway. And your locker and password are on your schedule.

DANNY :

Okay, thank you Ma’am!

DANNY leaves the front desk area and goes through the door into the school. Nobody was there either, which was great for him, he didn’t want to bother having to deal with new people.

NEW CLASSMATE, WHO DIS? - CONTINUOUS

DANNY sits near the back of the classroom. The Algebra 2 teacher MR.LOGGE had put him in one of the empty seats once they got to school and opened up the classroom. A few other kids are already in the classroom and more are in the hallway outside. DANNY had found his locker, and after struggling for a while he got it open and stored his things.

People start to file in talking to each other, the bell rings and the class quiets down. MR.LOGGE stands up at the front of the classroom.

MR.LOGGE :

Good morning class, hope you’re all doing well. We just got back from fall break so lets do some introductions. Everyone up and around the room please.

The class moves and everyone stands back to the walls.

MR.LOGGE :

Your name and pronouns, favorite movie, and favorite food. Who wants to volunteer?

No one says anything

MR.LOGGE :

Alright, volun-told then

He pointed to a short Asian girl by one of the windows.

MR.LOGGE :

How bout we start with you

The girl sighs but speaks anyway

RIKO :

Riko Sheridan She/Her, my favorite movie is “The Devil Wears Prada”, and my fave food is chicken alfredo.

DEADLIGHTS MASTERPOST, GENERAL NOTES, MEMES, AO3

#millywrites #dc x dp #dp x dc #dp x dc fanfic #danny x duke #duke x danny #danny fenton #duke thomas #dc #batman #signal #the signal #danny phantom #crossover #crossover ship #catboy!danny #kitten!danny

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toecrust69 · 1 year

Note

I love the Batsis that’s obsessed with cat woman, can we see how she Interacts with Selina in person?

A/N: OMG IM LITERALLY SO GLAD U ASKED. Also, sorry if this took a long time to answer!!

Oh and ur like 13 or 12 in this and Bruce and Selina are in a relationship (sorry if this was a stupid thing to metion)

I feel like it definitely depends on the situation, yk?

By that I mean whether or not batsis knows about Selina being Catwoman

If she doesn't know about it, she'll definitely fangirl about it to her

Since nobody else in the manor wants to talk about it, she's your last resort

It doesn't make her uncomfortable tho, she actually finds it kinda amusing

Can you imagine your boyfriends daughter fangiling about how hot, badass, cool, and iconic you are without even knowing they're fangirling over you?

She'd listen closely to every word you say, pride swelling up in her chest

"She's so cool! I'm honestly kinda jealous of Batman." She smirked and looked over her shoulder at you before responding.

"Really? How so?" She asked curiously.

"I dunno man, I think it's the fact that he gets to hang out with her everyday. If I ever see batman I'm gonna ask him for her number."

"Hang on, how old are you? And how do you know Bruce won't blow up?" You stopped chewing on your cereal for a second, thinking about what you'd say next

"First of all, Bruce should be proud of me! I just got the phone number of one of the hottest and most iconic people to ever live. If he doesn't feel proud or at the very least jealous, I don't know how he'd feel" you shrugged mindlessly

"Ok, but how old are you?"

"... old enough"

Your definitely her favorite, but she'll never admit it

About the body pillow...

She'd probably buy you more just to piss off Bruce (he had no idea you bought it)

She'd also buy you a bunch of merchandise of her

This includes shirts, shoes, pants, hats, pillows, underwear, glasses, posters, socks, etc.

Are you sad?? Don't worry, she has a catwoman mug in her purse custom made just for you :))

On the other hand, if you already know who she is, it's gonna be a bit of a mess

You'd definitely figure it out after fangirling about her for almost 6 months

You'd feel a bit embarrassed for a second before quickly recovering and going back to normal (for the most part)

To say the least, you'd constantly try to get her number or at the very least flirt with her

You know those tiktoks talking abt poetic rizz? Just imagine that if they were brought to life and now it's you

You'd follow her around the halls of the manor and batcave while reading out one of the latest poems you either read or made just for her

She ends up having to stiffle a laughe whenever your reading it to her and Bruce comes in with a huge frown on his face

He'd tell you to stop only for you to continue shortly after he leaves the room

" I would rather swim in a stormy sea than sail calm waters without yo-" you were quickly interrupted when Bruce came busting through the door with a huge frown on his face

"Stop it! She's almost 20 years older than you, leave her alone"

"Oh my bad, I'll stop" you answered dryly

"Good" He said sternly before walking out the room, leaving you and Selina alone. You turned around to look at her with a cocktail smirk, "I think he's jealous I'm trying to steal his girl and it's actually working ;)"

Yea no Bruce absolutely hates it

He doesn't like the fact that her daughter is getting more attention from his gf than him😭😭

But he knows that she'd never leave him for a 13 year old girl with amazing rizz like you, right?

... right?

Every time she comes back from a mission without you, you'd ask he about it

You'll listen intently to every word she says, making tiny comments every now and then

Once you turn 18, you'd rent an apartment and let her know so she can visit whenever she wants (yea ur still obsessed with her)

One time, you ended up not going on patrol for a whole week because you were sickand she came to visit you with chicken soup in her hands

You thanked her profusely and kept on offering her some stuff like water or food but she always declined

She was your guest after all

Am iconic one at that

She'd watch movies with you for a while before eventually forcing you to sleep

Then next day she'd invite you to go rob some jewelry stores with her, ivy, and harley

Speaking of ivy and harley

they absolutely adore you!!

Ivy never fails to notice how all the plants around you seem to lean into you when you walk past them

Your like a magnet and she seems to have gotten stuck onto you as well

I REALLY HOPE THAT MADE SENSE😭😭

Harley also can't help but notice the way her hyenas cuddle up to your legs whenever you come over to her apartment

She'd smile softly from the kitchen as she watched you play around with Bud and Lou

Oh and Selinas cats also like u

You're actually kinda fond of cats but you've never met any until one day when you can over to Selinas appartment

You'd only ever seen cats on TV or on the internet but never in real life

You were having fun playing around with her 10 cats until you began aggressively sneezing lmao

You ended up spread out on the floor, arms outstretched as the cats began surrounding you

You were still sneezing, just not as bad anymore

That was until one of the cats walked up to your face and began licking your face

You could feel a strong sneeze coming up but you didn't want to scare him away so you ended up having to hold your breath so you wouldnt sneeze

You held it in for such a long time that even Selina wondered how you were still alive

But you couldn't hold it in for too long so you ended up sneezing anyways lmao

Sorry if this was kinda short, should I make a pt.2??

Oh and credits to @thesharktanksdriver , she inspired me to make this and u can tell bc I used the same layout as her. Her writing is amazing and I highly recommend you read it!!

#fake scenarios #fanfiction #batfam x reader #batfam x batsis #selina x bruce #selina x reader #cat woman x reader #headcannons #lovely anon #answered #catwoman #selina wayne #pt2???#im definitely better at headcannons than actuall stories lmao

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aaa-battery-not-rechargeable · 3 months

Note

Aspec character headcanon I keep clinging onto despite all evidence to the contrary:

The Penguin, specifically in Batman '66. There's the pair of episodes (the first one is called "The Penguin Goes Straight) where he seduces a woman and gets a "wedding" just so he can steal all the presents/. When he gets caught, the woman loves him and offers to still do the romance or something. He practically begs to go to prison.

I headcanon him as aroace (aro due to his behaviour in the aforementioned episode, ace because he wears black, white and purple) (plus as a dapper bird-lover I project onto him a lot)

Also, I think there's strong evidence for Riddler in the Arkham games being aroallo. In Arkham Knight, one of his voice recordings has him talking about how he doesn't understand Batman and Catwoman's love (aro vibes) and in Arkham Origins when you get into his hideout he's got a calendar where the images are hot women. Also, most Riddler designs wear green and purple, but in Arkham Knight he just has green which I'm choosing to interpret as aroallo vibes. In general DC media I headcanon him as quoiromantic (a: because he was my quoiromantic awakening and b: his outfits are covered in question marks. He's definitely quoi to me)

I headcanon quite a lot of DC characters as aspec but these are the ones that have a bit of canon basis (even though some of them are just small things that don't apply in other DC media)

omg this is so detailed thank u!

its awesome to see aspec characters in the wild, and the fact that the color of the character's vibe or clothes is fitting or adding to the headcanon is very slay

cool aspec headcanons!

(fyi for anyone else sending hcs in, i'll be tagging them with #lilith's aspec character army)

#aspec character #asks #aspec headcanon #aspec headcanons #aro #aroace #ace #aromantic #asexual #aromantic asexual #quoiromantic #quoisexual #lilith's aspec character army

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inkareds · 7 months

Text

De Selby Part 1 Jason Todd x Reader 1 / 10 - Unreal Unearth Event

nav // event masterlist // dc masterlist // ko-fi

✧.* word count: 3.7k ✧.* genre: angst with happy ending ✧.* warnings: a lot of confusing conflicting back story with the reader and jason oh and mention of gore

When Jason was younger, a ghost would follow him around. Not in the literal sense, more of the metaphorical sense. You'd come to him in his darkest times, but when he knew you needed him most, you disappeared, like a ghost

(Ps I’m talking out of my ass when it comes to the Reader stealing shit. I have no idea if any of this works, I don’t want to research how to steal a headlight) Also song breakdown at the end of the fic

Requests are still open for my October writing prompts event!

"At last, when the world is asleep // You take in the blackness of air // The likes of a darkness so deep // That God at the start couldn't bear"

“Jason?” the thief stopped their incessant wriggling to get out from his hold, instead they froze looking up at the helmeted vigilante above them.

“What?” Jason froze, his brows furrowing in a deep set of confusion at the sound of his name from a stranger.

Until the thief reaches to take off their black mask from their face, showing Jason just who he caught trying to steal a Monet from Gotham’s Art Museum.

“Ghost,” he whispered.

“God I never would’ve thought you’d end up a crime-fighting badass, thought you’d just steal tires for the rest of your life.”

“I never thought you’d end up giving Catwoman a run for her money, I assumed you’d just be a petty thief your entire life.”

Jason took off his helmet and the domino mask, setting it down on the table in front of him. There was no need to hide his identity anymore. Not when you already knew from the moment you heard his modulated voice from underneath the mask.

You chuckled at his response, making your way into his hideout whenever he’s in Gotham. It makes sense that he wouldn’t take you to his apartment, if he even got one in Gotham, after all, you were still a criminal. Who knows what you were planning on doing?

Nothing except watching your childhood friend make tea, that’s for sure.

“Two-”

“Very full teaspoons of sugar,” Jason cut you off before you could finish your sentence. Turning towards you with two mugs in his hands, a sly smirk on his face, “Don’t think I’d forget how you’re on the road for early diabetes.”

He offered you the mug after you sat on one of the very few seats he had in the hideout. You whispered a thank you before he took his own seat in front of you. The cup of tea warmed your cold hands. Whether Gotham was getting colder over the years or you were getting weaker either way, it wouldn’t work out in your favour.

Your eyes idly looked to your side as you lightly blew the top of your tea to cool it down faster. Autumn had just started, which meant winter was coming, and with winter comes the hardest months in the entire year for you.

Though you didn’t want to think about that now, not when someone you thought was long gone was now seated in front of you, and the hot tea you were looking down on now seemed extremely delectable. Slowly you brought the cup up to your lips, feeling the hot liquid coat your tongue and throat, slightly burning the back of it, though you couldn’t care less.

To be quite frank, you didn’t remember the last time you had fresh and hot tea.

When you finished your small sip, you pulled it down and let the taste linger in your mouth. Sighing and closing your eyes.

“That’s the shit right there,” you murmured, feeling your chest already warmed up from a single sip.

Jason watched, eyes focused and trained. He’s looking at you as if he’s looking at a ghost. In a way, he guessed he was kind of looking at a ghost. A ghost of his past.

“Staring problem, Todd?” You quipped, looking up through your eyelashes at him.

Jason shook his head, all these years and yet he’s still speechless whenever you spoke.

“Is this the part where you cuff me and bring me to the station after threatening me not to tell anyone your secret identity?”

“What? No.” He didn’t know why he answered as quickly as he did, nor as nervous as he did. But it seemed to make you laugh, so he didn’t dwell too long on it.

“Don’t worry, you don’t need to threaten me, I promise I would never.”

Had any other crook or criminal told him that after knowing his secret identity, Jason wouldn’t believe them. Though for some reason, hearing it with your voice, he knows it to be true.

He doesn’t know what to say and it seems you were done with talking too. Choosing to instead put all your focus on the cup of tea in your hands. So the two of you were quiet for a little while.

Jason took a few sips from his mug but found it difficult to feel relaxed even with his favourite tea. Every now and again he’d sneak glances towards you, how much you’ve changed and how much you haven’t.

You were taller, stronger, smarter, sharper. And if your previous crimes were anything to note, though he didn’t know it was you at the time, you were getting sneakier. Quieter in your steps. You looked more tired than he remembered too.

But, you still had that faraway look in your eyes, that almost-ghostly glaze which coats your gaze. He could still see the storm brewing in your mind from your eyes. The amount of thoughts that haunted your every waking moment.

Above all else, you still had that large scar on the palm of your hands.

He didn’t realise he’d been staring at it for long until you shifted in your seat. Moving your hands so that you’d cup the mug tighter in your hands, effectively covering every inch of your palm from his wandering gaze.

Jason found himself at the spot to say something, anything at all.

“I tried looking for you.” Were the only words he could think of to say.

Your eyes immediately darted to him, a sense of shock encompassing your body for a solid second. Before you relaxed, you dropped your shoulders in a weak attempt to pretend his words didn’t affect you.

“I know.”

“I couldn’t find you.”

“I know.” You repeated

“Why couldn’t I find you?” He croaked, almost desperate for answers.

“You’ll never get all of them off if you don’t go faster.”

A young Jason Todd, scraggly and dirty from the muck of the streets snapped his head towards the voice. There, from the dark of the alleyway, out came another equally dirty and messy kid.

“I thought you were a ghost.” he stated before going back to work trying to take off the parked car’s headlights before the owners could come back.

“You’re lucky I’m not,” you smugly answered him with a grin on your face before taking the small screwdriver from his hands and pushing him aside, “Because no ghost would be able to teach you how to do it quicker.”

Jason scoffed at your smug behaviour, though that irritation was quickly wiped off his face when you managed to take off the headlight he’d been tinkering with for the past 10 minutes or so, shy of just a few minutes.

When you looked back at him, holding the headlight in one hand and the screwdriver in the other he rolled his eyes. He can’t believe he was bested by the smugest kid in all of Gotham's slums. But you threw the headlight in his direction, surprising him and causing him to almost drop and smash the entire thing, rendering it useless in the spare parts market. All before you turned towards the other one.

“The trick is to find a weak point in the glass before you start trying to wedge your screwdriver in there.” You explained eyes focusing on the headlight in front of you, “When you find it, it’s best to work fast and strong. So that the metal doesn’t have time to adjust to the new weight.”

When you were eventually able to wedge the second headlight out, just like the first one, you gave it over towards him.

“Is this some kind of trick to get me to owe you? Cause I don’t owe you jack shit!” Jason, the smart-ass kid he was, spat out after he placed down the two headlights you were able to get out for him.

This response caused you to laugh.

“Hey, we’re all just trying to survive out here, right? Nothing wrong with helping out every once in a while. You don’t owe me anything, I promise.” You explained before handing him his screwdriver and making your way back from where you came from to leave him to steal the other two back headlights.

“Who are you anyways?” He mumbled rolling his eyes.

“Wouldn’t you like to know, pretty boy?” Was your last statement before Jason saw you disappearing into the shadows.

He scoffed and went back to work, thinking how ridiculous you were acting. As if you were some kind of Batman reject.

“I didn’t want to be found.” You answered after gritting your teeth.

Years of hatred and anger bubbled up in that moment. As he slammed the mug down on the table in front of him he stood, towering over you.

“Why not?! I looked for you for years out there! You know the amount of guilt I had after realising I left you out there alone?!”

Jason could tell he was slowly irritating you with the way you refused to look up at him and instead turned your attention back towards the window, watching the dark of Gotham.

“That’s your own psycho problem, not mine. I told you, you didn’t owe me jack shit. I didn’t want your charity, I taught you all of those things from the goodness of my own fucking heart.” You abruptly stood at the last part of your statement as if standing would prove your point that you were stronger than he thought.

That just because he was adopted by the richest guy in all of Gotham and somehow is now a crime-fighting, gun-swinging, vigilante-hero thing, he wasn’t better than you. He wasn’t stronger than you. At least, that’s what he knows you just want him to think.

“Don’t play fucking dumb, you know I don’t mean that.”

Ghost as he affectionately nicknamed you, as you kept popping up from the darkness somehow any time he needed help and then leaving when your job was done, visited him more often than not.

The two of you even worked together to pull off a large steal from a random guy’s car, basically almost dismantling the entire engine to take out all the things both of you could resell.

He didn’t really want to admit it, but Jason thought he finally found himself a friend. Even if he didn’t know your name. Not due to a lack of trying though, he’s tried, repeatedly, to ask for your name. Even going so far as following you when you think no one’s there, to see if you knew other people who would give him a clue of your name.

All for naught.

So, he settled with just calling you Ghost.

He’s done his fair share of rebellion and troublemaking in both daylight and nightfall, yet he’s only ever seen you when the sun is long gone. As if by daylight you disappeared from the face of the Earth.

He didn’t mind, at least, not when he could see you and talk to you almost every other night.

“How’d you know I needed help that time, by the way?” He once asked after you finished eating the last of your taffy that he helped pickpocket from a guy that just left a candy store.

You grinned a wide, sugar-stained grin. “I was observing you.” You threw your head back in laughter when Jason’s brows furrowed in shock. “I go there almost every week to see if some dumbass is stupid enough to park their car there. I thought you were pretty cute when I saw you already there and then you annoyed me by taking so long with ONE headlight!”

The insult at the end of your statement completely masked your confession at the beginning of it. This caused Jason to react to the second part of your statement, not the first.

“Hey! I do it faster than you now!” He pushed your side, causing you to stumble on the crate you were standing on.

“Ungrateful brat!” You yelled out before lunging towards him, tackling him to the ground as the two of you pretended to fight one another.

Something weirdly common between the two of you now. Jason thought it felt great, he knew he was still a kid, despite all the things he’s done and will continue to do in the slums of Gotham. So being able to do normal kid things felt weirdly cathartic to him.

But when he started laughing louder than he usually let himself, you pulled away. Standing up and offering him a hand to help him up too.

“But yeah, that’s it I guess,” you shrugged before turning your back towards him.

A sure sign he understood now as your way of leaving. Before you could disappear into the darkness like you always did, he did something he never did before. He called out to you.

“You think you could come in a more regular interval? I’m getting tired of thinking I’m about to be scared by a ghost, Ghost.”

You froze in your steps and Jason was afraid he’d said something wrong.

But then a humourless chuckle escaped you.

“Yeah, sure, who knows?” You muttered uncommittedly.

The next few days you didn’t show up, which caused Jason to slightly grow worried about you. However, he did try to push it away as his mother was getting increasingly aggressive and the time he saw her not passed out or drugged out of her mind, decreased.

It wasn’t like he saw you all the time anyway, and there were times when the two of you wouldn’t see each other for a full week before you showed up again.

But you always showed up, and you always somehow managed to find him.

Days stretched into weeks, and weeks stretched into a few months. Then his mother died. Overdosed on her pills and Jason had reached his tipping point.

The next thing he remembered was accidentally getting in trouble with the wrong group of people, he doesn’t even really remember how he got there. His memory buzzed over from the mixed emotions circling through his mind. What he does remember is what happened.

A group of older teenagers pushed him to the ground. There were three of them, had it just been one person he could’ve taken them on, it wasn’t the first scuffle he’s had to deal with. But there were three of them and after landing punch after punch on a few of them, they quickly gained the upper hand.

He remembered struggling against their hold as two of them held him down and the other pulled out a knife from his pocket. Jason remembered screaming, he didn’t want to die, not now.

Then through the haze of adrenaline and fear all became blurry. He remembered seeing you come down from the darkness like a ghost, pushing the guy with the knife away to the ground. The force and surprise caught him off guard, enough to have him hit the ground hard enough that he must’ve gained a concussion.

The shock of it all caused the other two holding him down to loosen their hold, he remembered taking advantage of this and pulling away. Decking the two of them straight in the face. Clearly not enough to knock them down though, he wasn’t quite as big as them yet.

“What the fuck are you standing there for?!” Your voice cut him from his frozen position, “Run!” You yelled at him, turning around to face him, your back facing the unconscious guy with the knife.

Jason’s eyes widened when he saw the guy start standing up, his knife glinting in the scarce street lights that reached the alleyway all of you were in.

“Look out!” He yelled out desperately, hopeful that you’d be able to dodge or do something.

When you turned it was too late, the most you could do was shield your face with the palms of your hands, instinct more than anything. The knife ripped across the skin of both the palms of your hands, forming a large laceration across your hands.

You screamed as you turned to Jason once more.

“RUN!” He doesn’t know why he listened to you.

Perhaps it was fear but had he not turned his heel and ran away maybe he wouldn’t have been filled with so much guilt as he did when Bruce Wayne adopted him.

Jason remembered hearing the sound of a policeman coming to the alleyway after he had run away. Effectively saving your life and chasing the punks away. But that was the last time he ever saw you.

Like a ghost, you disappeared.

“Don’t act like a child, that was years ago.” You gritted your teeth at him, clenching your fists, feeling the grooves of the scars in the palms of your hands.

Seeing as Jason wasn’t responding anymore, you started making your way towards the door to leave him. Yet before you could even take more than a step, Jason grasped your arm.

“I thought you were dead. I thought I left you for dead that night.” Jason spoke through gritted teeth, his hold tight and sure.

“Well, you didn’t, I was fine.” You tried brushing it off again but Jason wouldn’t relent.

“Why won’t you just let me help you?!”

“Because-” You roughly pulled your hand from his grasp taking steps back in the process to look at him in the eyes. “I realised something the last time we saw each other before I saved your life.” You pointed an accusatory finger at him.

“You, Jason fucking Todd, looked at me like I hung the stars. Like I was the sun and moon. Like I was your saviour. Guess what?!” You exasperatedly explained, “I’m no one’s fucking saviour and the fact that you looked at me like that scared me. You deserve better than me Jason, better than a petty thief!”

At this point, you were yelling, years of built-up anger and anticipation bubbled up in your throat and spilled out like word vomit. The two of you were so close to each other that you can’t help but realise just how much he’s changed over the years.

“You know I saw when Batman came to you, saw how he took you to Wayne manor. I figured Batman was Bruce Wayne and after seeing in the news that the great Mr. Wayne had just adopted another kid from the streets, around the same time Batman had a new Robin. I knew that was you.” You shook your head.

“I saw you once, whizzing above me, a big smile on your face with that large stupid yellow cape. That day I told myself I’m not going to drag you down with me any longer. You’re going to be better than me, you’re going to be better than anything in this fucking shithole of a place! And I wasn’t going to do shit that would hold you down. So, you’re asking why I didn’t want you to find me, there! That’s the reason, oh great Red Hood!”

You didn’t know what fueled your anger, maybe it was the fact that he wasn’t getting it. That you were doing this for him. That you wanted to cut all his ties from his shitty past and let him make a new present for himself. A better one. But when he wouldn’t even say anything, your frustration boiled over.

You roughly pushed his chest, “Say something god damnit! You were always such a talker, why are you being so quiet now huh?!”

Before you could push him again or hit him or do something that would elicit a reaction, any kind of reaction. Jason quickly took ahold of both your hands by your wrist.

“I died being Robin.”

You scoffed hearing his first words after your whole tirade of a confession.

“Yeah, I know, saw it in the news. Fucking bawled like a baby when I saw it. Why'd you think I was shocked when I saw you?” You refused to meet his gaze.

“That’s not the point,” he tightened his hold on your wrist, instinctively causing you to look back at him. “Before I died I thought about a lot of things, but the last thing I remembered was how I wished I could see you just one last time before I disappeared.”

In his eyes was a hurricane of emotion, ones you didn’t know how to feel about.

“When I got resurrected, you were the first thing I thought about. I went insane, my mind was scattered, and every piece of me was like shattered glass. The first place I thought to go to after that was the alleyway where I last saw you. I thought you’d be there. I don’t know why I thought you’d be there, but I just-" he paused, furrowing his brows trying to find his words.

"I just- you're right." He accepted, letting go of your hand. His head hanging lowly, defeated. You hated that look on him. "You're right, I saw you like you hung up the stars because you did. Back then you-"

You didn't know what possessed you at that moment. But before Jason could finish his ramble, your impatience pushed you to pull him down and slam your lips against his.

It was awkward, a mish-mash of lips, teeth, and a flurry of emotions. But Jason leaned in. He even placed a hand on your back before you pulled away.

"You talk too much." One of your hands crept up to his face.

There were a lot of things unsaid between the two of you. A lot of messy emotions with no clear connection and end. Yet, the moment he looked into your eyes and you to his, it seemed like it didn't matter anymore.

Then you said something. A single word.

"What?" He whispered, leaning into your touch.

"My name." You repeat what you said before, "That's my name."

Jason grinned.

Maybe you're right, maybe he should leave everything from his past in the past. He'll leave the pathetic child he was behind, he'll leave the slums of Gotham behind, and he'll leave the petty ghost-like thief.

Because right now, he doesn't know why, but he's sure you won't disappear anymore.

In De Selby part 1, Hozier references the fictional philosopher De Selby from the book The Third Policeman by Flann O’Brien. De Selby had several theories, one that I want to explore in reference in this fic, the first being that he theorised nightfall is an accumulation of black air, existence, and consequently, death is a hallucination. There was one other I wanted to explore but just didn't have the time to write it all down cause it was getting quite long.

#Jason todd x reader #jason todd #red hood x reader #dc x reader #red hood x nb reader #jason todd x nb reader #red hood #dc comics #red hood fluff #jason todd fluff #jason todd angst #red hood angst #red ink unreal unearth event

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batmanfruitloops · 2 months

Text

I've had no internet for about 3 days now, but I'm back, babies!!!

Also I'm just going to slap all the playlists I currently have into one post instead of staggering them; they all get updated as often as Fluffy and I think a song fits anyhow.

I would appreciate song suggestions for characters I don't have covered (or ones already listed, that's cool too) if you have one in mind that you think fits. Please don't be offended if we don't end up adding them though, it still has to feel right to us, but it's nice to be told about them, :)

There will be rogues/characters you may have not seen yet, they'll show up eventually, I promise, Sars is very bad at planning and doing, we shame! (lighthearted)

- Sarsee

Batman

Joker

Riddler

Scarecrow

Two-Face

Mad Hatter

Catwoman

Bane

Mr. Freeze

Penguin

Harley Quinn

Poison Ivy

Clayface

Firefly

Azrael

Killer Moth

Music Meister

Polka Dot Man

Hush

Titans

FruityBats (ship)

Mothflame (ship)

Polka Dot Music (ship)

Vegababes (ship)

Poisonous Poppies (ship)

Catsbane (ship)

Gotham (as in the city as a whole)

Alt. Timelines (I will post what I mean by this eventually, I just need to GET TO IT RAAA)

(Also sharing an non-au related Batman: The Enemy Within - villain!Joker Batjokes playlist because they make me sick to my stomach in a good way. I love the vigilante!Joker ending more, but both are good)

Telltale Batjokes

(ALSO×2 any moots who are willing to share their own Batman related playlists with me, my DMs are always open here and on Discord 👀)

#batmanfruitloops #anewgothamau #fruitloopsplaylists #masterpost<will be updated as applies

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lucky-katebishop · 8 months

Text

I Read Contagion (1996) For the First Time Pt. 2

Wooh! I'm done with the series! It was really good! My favorite art style was Catwoman's. (some background info: there's a plague going around in Gotham nicknamed the Clench and Tim catches it)

also under the cut, content warning for blood, illness, IVs and medical tubes.

Whenever Tim's in danger of dying, they always, always emphasize Jason's death. I understand his resentment; if I were only used as a cautionary tale, I would be pissed. But this is about Timmy! Dick is so distraught in this series.

I'm debating putting this as my icon but I don't want to freak anyone out because of the blood. But it's so good.

Oh, God. Tim, you're currently dying. Let Alfred mother-hen you.

So the context for this one is that Tim's dreaming of a life where his mom is alive and his parents and his girlfriend know that he's Robin and they're fine with it and I- in Tim's subconscious he has Bruce tell him that he should cut back being Robin. Tim loves being Robin, he doesn't want to give it up. But he's been putting his all into it, and that can be taxing. Tim loves Robin, but it's obvious that it's not all he wants to be. It just makes it worse that after he gets better, he immediately goes out and fights crime because who else would do it?

She's so pretty. Just an appreciation screencap of *her*

This is the emotional image of a man who thinks his little brother is dead. Let that sink in.

(for context: Alfred jokes around with Dick and lets him believe that Tim died of the Clench. But Tim's completely fine)

I agree with Dick, Alfie. You were foul for this.

(for context this was between Bruce and Gordon - obviously)

So Tim gets better and the second he does, he decides to go fight crime and what does he do??? He immediately falls asleep. God, I love this boy.

Batcave? Batmobile? Nah, batnap.

I love him.

Just thought these pics were cool

Jesus, Tim. Just tell your dad that you got sick and let him give you a hug. Why isn't he being hugged more? Dixon, explain. He almost DIED!

#tim drake #red robin #robin #batman and robin #dc #chuck dixon #comics #dc comics #batman contagion #batman #batfam #batfamily #dick grayson #bruce wayne #ruth reads comics #my posts #detective comics #selina kyle #alfred pennyworth

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wonderfulworldofmichaelford · 8 months

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Psycho Analysis: Snowflame

(WARNING! This analysis contains C-C-C-COCAINE!)

Imagine this absurd concept: A supervillain cartel boss whose powers are fueled by him getting high off his own supply. Imagine too that this man wears a ridiculous outfit, and exists to be an anti-drug PSA that fails epically because he makes doing drugs look awesome. Now also imagine that everything about him is played completely straight without a single bit of acknowledgment of how absurd and campy the whole thing is.

That, my friends, is Snowflame.

The New Guardians is a comic series that would have been long forgotten as a crusty relic of the late 80s if not for giving the world the absolute coolest villain ever conceived. Snowflame has amassed a cult following the likes of which would make Jim Jones envious, due to the sheer absurdity of his existence and the pure unadulterated action movie villain charm of his dialogue. He’s perhaps one of the most minor villains out there with only a handful of appearances to his name, but he’s loved more than villains who’ve appeared twenty times as much as him.

I’m here to show you why.

Motivation/Goals: Snowflame is a cartel leader, and so he really wants to peddle drugs. Guess which drug is his forte. Go on, guess. And that’s really all there is to him! I need to reiterate that his threat as a cartel leader is played completely and utterly straight even as he spouts off the hammiest dialogue you’ve ever seen and literally gets a power up by snorting coke. This is the very core of his appeal, in that he is something genuinely terrifying and threatening but presented in a way only a comic book can pull off.

Of course, his true motivation is far, far simpler.

Look at this man. That is the face of a man who exists solely to snort illicit substances up his nose. He lives to be high. That is the extent of his desires, and all else is second to that simple goal. As long as he can ignite and continue to be the instrument of cocaine's will, he is satisfied.

Final Fate: Every single time Snowflame shows up, he dies. In his initial appearance, he apparently blows up, but three decades later, he makes his coke-fueled return to do battle with Catwoman, and despite inhaling enough cocaine to kill an elephant, a feat that should theoretically make him nigh invincible, he fucking dies.

...Or does he? Snowflame returns yet again in Peacemaker Tries Hard! Here he does battle with, you guessed it,

...who puts a poison dart frog in his cocaine and kills him.

Maybe. My theory is that Snowflame is the Kenny of the DC universe, and whenever some bastard kills him his coke-fueled powers just respawn him the next day.

Best Scene: While his fight against Catwoman is unfortunately lackluster as ordained by the writers (Selina is not lasting two seconds against Snowflame and his coke-fueled powers under realistic circumstances), it gave us one of the most gorgeous and badass panels ever made:

Really brings a tear to your eye, doesn’t it?

Best Quote: Yeah, there’s no fucking contest here, it’s this:

Final Thoughts & Score: I think I speak for all of us when I say Snowflame is one of the greatest fucking characters ever conceived.

Everything about him is a towering testament to what makes the medium of comic books great. The best villains tend to be the wildest and most out-there concepts, like a giant alien starfish that mind controls people, or a gay gorilla in love with a brain in a jar, or a giant racist communist egg. And don’t even get me started on the villains the Doom Patrol fights! Snowflame is the epitome of that; he is what would happen if Tony Montana was a DC supervillain by way of Captain Planet. He is absurd, over-the-top, and so goddamn cool.

It’s very obvious they were trying to do an anti-drug PSA here given the time the comic was released, but it absolutely falls flat on its face when the strawman constructed to be defeated so that the lesson might be dispersed is an absolute lunatic who dresses in colorful spandex and spouts off the most epic lines to ever come out of a villain’s mouth. Everything about him is absurd, but unlike something like Egg Fu he’s absurd in a tasteful and cool way rather than a shockingly racist way. Snowflame is just a dude who snorts cocaine to gain superpowers, it’s as simple as that and yet it’s also completely bonkers.

It’s genuinely unsurprising that this guy managed to get such a massive cult following that he spawned a fanmade webcomic and then got to pop up in the comics again over three decades after his supposed death. And it’s said cult following that has allowed him to pop up time and time again, even getting an appearance in the fourth season of Harley Quinn. I’m sure you can guess that I’m part of that massive cult fanbase, and I can only dream of writing a villain as incredible and grandiose as this drug-addled madman. Infinity/10 isn’t a real score, so he’ll have to settle for a 10/10 instead.

...Oh yeah, remember in the Egg Fu review when I said I wasn’t going to review Hemo-Goblin?

Psycho Analysis: Hemo-Goblin

This is gonna be really short, because there is so little to this guy. He is a one-shot, but boy what a fucking shot he is. Hemo-Goblin is a racist vampire created by South African white supremacists to give members of the New Guardians AIDS. You read that right. This is a racist AIDS vampire.

Now, unlike Egg Fu, who was a horrible racist caricature created from topical anti-communist sentiments of the time, Hemo-Goblin was seemingly created with better intentions. But you know what they say about intentions; the road to Hell is paved with good ones. I get wanting to do a commentary on the AIDS crisis, and I don’t think it’s out of the question for a superhero book to handle such a thing, but maybe having an AIDS-powered vampire give HIV to a Jamaican woman and a gay man isn’t the most tasteful and nuanced way to do this.

Oh, and by the end of his only appearance, he dies of AIDS in jail.

I’m not gonna lie, guys: I kinda love this stupid fucking creature. His weird design, the absurdity of his concept, and the awful execution of his premise makes him memorable for all the wrong reasons, but he’s memorable nonetheless. I think if Snowflame didn’t exist and wasn’t the coolest villain ever, more people would talk about the insanity that is Hemo-Goblin, though having a single appearance before dying and never appearing again doesn’t help his case much. Still, he’s just cazy enough to earn himself a 3.5/10, so he’s got that going for him.

#Psycho Analysis #DC #Snowflame #Hemo-Goblin #The New Guardians

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havendance · 2 years

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No Man’s Land Event Timeline

I am of the opinion that more people should write fic set in No Man's Land, but considering it's like, 80 issues long (not counting the lead up) I've made this timeline to make it easier for people who don't have time to spend like a month reading comics. (And also as a reference for myself. So, ever wondered what went down in No Man's Land? This is for you.

(For a timeline of comics that made up the event you can check the other timeline I made here)

(Also available to read on AO3 for your convenience)

Part 1: The Quake

Before we actually get to No Man’s Land Proper, we need to get some facts down about why it happened in the first place. Which means we’re going to be touching on Batman: Cataclysm. (The Batman: Contagion event (where Gotham got hit by a plague known as the Clench) also happened prior to this and contributed to No Man's Land being a thing, but this timeline is already long enough as it is so we won't be going into detail about that.)

In late June/early July, at 7:03pm, a quake 7.6 on the Richter scale hit’s Gotham

While we don’t know the exact date, Batman chronicles #14 reveals that it’s before July fourth.

When the quake hits:

Bruce, Alfred, and Harold are all in the Batcave

Dick is in Bludhaven

Tim is on a plane flying back to Gotham

He’s just resolved to open up to his dad. That doesn’t actually happen.

Helena Bertinelli (a.k.a the Huntress) is in a subway car

Stephanie is at the mall

Catwoman is breaking into a building

Azrael is handing Bane off to the GCPD (Bane gets away)

After the quake dies down:

A number of prisoners escape Blackgate (including Cluemaster)

Lots of people die

Batman, Robin, and Nightwing all run rescue efforts. Huntress and Catwoman are also shown helping out

Alfred and Harold work to repair the manner and clear the batcave

Batman runs around in a bat-monster truck (Not particularly plot relevant, but it looks cool)

Bruce works tirelessly both as Batman and Bruce Wayne to try and aid rescue efforts, pour in relief funds, and convince business owners to remain in Gotham

Part 2: The Abandonment of Gotham

Bruce goes to DC to speak to congress in hopes of securing federal aid for Gotham

However, giving aid to Gotham is *wildly* unpopular and he fails

An executive order declares Gotham No Man’s Land

The city is given 48 hours to evacuate before they blow up the bridges. People with a criminal record are not allowed out.

Later comics reference Black Monday which means that presumably the government gave Gotham a weekend to evacuate.

In Batman: No Man’s Land Secret File #1, it’s revealed that the bridges were blown at Midnight on New’s Year’s Day

(Personally, I don’t think this date makes sense, largely based off of vibes, but also partially based off of dates given later. It’s the perennial comics retcon at work. Regardless, since it’s a solid date, I’ll be calculating later dates based off of it. I think I’m also going to have to make a timeline that I don’t hate where I just ignore this though)

During this Jim Gordon tries to get a job outside of Gotham before discovering that he’s a laughing stock outside the city and deciding to stay in No Man’s Land instead

Barbara Gordon also decides to remain in Gotham

Part 3: No Man’s Land

We open 93 days after they blew the bridges

While vibe-wise, it feels like late fall/early winter to me, based off of the New Year’s day Black Monday date, it’s April 3rd. (Yeah, I don’t think the date makes any sense, but I like numbers so I’ll keep doing the math.)

The next time check in we’re given is 127 days in. It’s noted that it’s the tail end of the Winter. (Date wise this would be May 7th)

(Look, maybe weather’s just different in New Jersey, but May does not feel like the tail end of winter to me.)

Status Quo:

Batman is who knows where. None of his allies have seen or heard from him.

We later learn that he went on a Bruce Wayne guilt bender and tried to bury his guilt over failing Gotham in partying.

Oracle is based out of the clocktower. She gains intel through a network of informants and food by using her knowledge of the city’s fallout shelters.

Jim Gordon is running what remnants of the GCPD remained in No Man’s Land along with his wife, Sarah Essen. He’s currently angry with Batman for disappearing and will remain so for some time.

Helena Bertinelli is both operating as Huntress and has recently taken up a Bat-themed mantle. She calls herself the Bat, but she is later referred to as Batgirl.

Though not mentioned in the opening salvo, we later learn that Leslie Thomkins remained in No Man’s Land and is operating a medical aid camp clinic place thing.

We also later learn that Alfred Pennyworth spent his time up to this point wandering around Gotham, helping people out, delivering at least one baby, and raising moral through storytelling and performances.

Outside of Gotham:

Nightwing is facing the usual combination of corruption and crime in Blüdhaven.

Robin has moved to Keystone City with his dad.

Stephanie Brown is approximately 7-8 months pregnant and living in the Gotham area outside of the No Man’s Land zone.

Azrael is doing stuff I guess? I think he’s chasing down some villain dude? Look, does anyone really care about Azrael?

(Note from future Havendance: Okay, so No Man’s Land actually made me care some about Azrael)

Catwoman. I’m sorry, but I can’t tell you what Catwoman’s up to either. She’s not in Gotham, I can tell you that much.

100 days into No Man’s Land (April 10th), Batman shows back up. (Alfred Pennyworth is with him). The GCPD take back Old Town (I think? It’s the part of Gotham with the clock tower). Barbara and her father are reunited.

Before the next timeline checkpoint various things happen:

Azrael enters No Man’s Land

Batman begins working with Batgirl

Batman makes a deal with the Penguin to establish himself back in Gotham and gain information

Batman makes a deal with a former enemy (Lockup) to get Blackgate prison up and running.

Black Mask is locked inside, taking him off the map.

Barbara Gordon discovers that there is someone else operating as Batgirl

Superman shows up for a day to try and lend a hand.

127 days into No Man’s Land (May 27th). The tail end of winter. A lot of politics/land war stuff goes down.

Pre shuffle map:

(Unfortunately, I don’t believe their’s a post-shuffle map)

The Penguin makes a deal with Two Face to get at Batman. The GCPD makes a deal with Two Face to get at the Penguin’s territory. The end result is that Two Face takes Batman’s territory and the GCPD take half of Penguin’s territory.

Meanwhile, Outside of No Man’s Land:

Stephanie Brown gives birth

The Drakes move back to the Gotham area

Dick Grayson enters the police academy, hoping to root out the corruption on the force from the inside

As a result of all the politics/land war shuffle up:

Two Face hires David Cain to try and kill Jim Gordon. He’s stopped by Batman with the help of Cassandra Cain (currently without a name).

Batman finally admits that he can’t take care of the city on his own and calls in help.

Batman fires Helena Bertinelli from Batgirl for not adhering to his impossibly high standards. He gives the mantle to Cassandra Cain.

Also around this time, Jim Gordon punches Batman in the face. Which isn’t particularly plot relevant, but I thought you should know.

Once everyone’s assembled (Around day 189 (July 7th))

Azrael and Batgirl are sent to take down Nicholas Scratch — a charismatic radio personality who pushed for No Man’s Land to be a thing in the first place, now in the city and causing trouble.

Nightwing is sent to take control of Blackgate back from Lockup. He succeeds but gets beat to hell and has to be nursed back to health by Barbara Gordon.

Batman and Robin investigate Poison Ivy’s hold on Robinson Park. They find that she and the orphans she’d taken under her protection have been imprisoned by Clayface and end up working with her to take him down. The end of this storyline is noted to be the first day of summer.

( Side note here, officially, the first day of summer is on June 21st, which would put the start of No Man’s Land back before the New Year’s date. And honestly, July feels way too late for the first day of summer, but I don’t know why I’m trying to get a consistent timeline out of comics in the first place. *sigh* I’ll just stick a timeline that I think works better at the end of all of this.)

Around this time:

Jim Gordon attempts to break off his deal with Two Face. Two Face does not like that, and as a result he takes Rene Montoya and her family hostage.

Helena Bertinelli, now back to the Huntress mantel, teams up with Petit who broke off from the GCPD for being a little too into shooting people.

Catwoman is recruited by Batman to steal some discs with data on them that he says is vital to restoring Gotham. She succeeds but then proceeds to sell the data to the highest bidder. At this point in time, it’s unclear if Batman ever gets the data.

Side note, but apparently before all this, she managed to get elected the mayor of New York and then had to fake her death by having Catwoman push Selina Kyle off a building. It all sounds wild. Maybe I should be reading the Catwoman comics…

Bane enters Gotham, recruited by a mysterious outside influence (Later revealed to be an agent of Lex Luthor). He’s apparently no longer on venom? Idk, I don’t really care about Bane. This timeline is somewhat biased in case you couldn’t tell.

Robin gets in the middle of a three-way battle in the subway between the Ratcatcher, Mr Freeze, and two guys whose names I don’t remember. He ends up sick due to a nasty combination of rat bites and sewage (excellent sickfic potential, that’s all I’m saying)

Side note: in this story, we learn that apparently a bunch of Tim's old classmates are larping as their DnD characters in the sewers of No Man’s Land which is one of those details I feel compelled to share with you.

Also at this time, Stephanie’s mom learns about her being Spoiler and tells her to stop.

Batman teams up with Lynx to take down a gang in Chinatown that’s enslaving people to generate electric power.

Harley Quinn shows up for the first time, dating the Joker.

Bane blows up Gotham’s Hall of Records.

Meanwhile, the Street Demonz hit up Two Face’s territory, capturing him and nearly executing him via hanging before Batman and Robin save him for… reasons. I’m honestly not sure why. Because Two Face is too popular of a villain to kill I guess.

A later retcon says that Batman actually blew up the hall of records? For reasons that are also unclear? Whatever.

Superman visits Gotham again, this time helping people out in civilian form.

Killer Croc makes a move on the Penguin’s territory. He’s stopped by Robin (still recovering from his illness) and a temporary alliance between the Penguin and the GCPD.

During this story it’s also revealed that it’s been about two weeks since Tim and Dick entered Gotham.

However, this should be taken with a grain of salt since also in this story, Rene Montoya is shown to be back with the GCPD which, as I’ll get to in the next bullet point, implies that months must have passed since he entered.

Tim also calls his dad and lets him know that he’s in No Man’s Land. This leads to his dad calling his senator and the fact that Tim’s in No Man’s Land becomes a national news story.

Note: We’ll be coming back to this.

Two Face kidnaps Jim Gordon and holds a trial for him regarding the deal they previously made. Despite the fact that Two Face is literally the only person running the trial, Gordon is found Not Guilty. As a result of this trial Rene Montoya and her family are freed and Two Face is arrested, taking him off the map.

Look, please just read Batman #572 and Detective Comics #739. A summary does not do this justice.

Timeline wise, the trial reveals that Rene has been held by Two Face for five months. This would be at minimum, three full months and two parts of a month, meaning between 120 and 150 days have passed. This would put us between day 300 and day 330 of No Man’s Land. I’m going to assume day 300 since our next check in is day 312. Going off the New Year’s day zero date, this would put us in Late October.

Following this, Jim Gordon and Batman finally make up.

Catwoman re-enters Gotham and hands off the data to Batman (An event so important that it’s shown in near-identical detail in *three* separate comic issues. I’m not annoyed.)

This retroactively pushes Batman contacting her and her whole heist deal to happen circa day 300 of No Man’s Land.

At an unclear point in the chronology, while Barbara’s nursing Dick back to health, Petit’s faction attempts to kidnap Barbara. Huntress is initially aiding him, before turning against him (temporarily).

Our Next solid date Day 312 of No Man’s Land (November 8th):

Lex Luthor enters Gotham and begins to rebuild as part of a larger plot to gain control over Gotham.

The Joker begins making plans

Huntress is finding herself chafing more in her partnership with Petit

Roughly day 323 of No Man’s Land, an executive order is signed that will No Man’s Land on January 1st (the one year anniversary)

During the last month of No Man’s Land:

Lex Luthor and the government lead various rebuilding efforts

Azrael and Batgirl assist Batman in going up against the Joker a couple of times

Catwoman spends time messing with Lex Luthor

Batman convinces Bane to leave Gotham. We learn that he was apparently promised rule of Santa Prisca by Luthor in exchange for his services.

Christmas Eve (And at some point in the night, Christmas Day) — shit hits the fan.

The Joker makes his move, attacking Petit’s territory. Petit and many of his men are killed by the Joker. Huntress makes a final stand, nearly dying at the Joker's hands before Batman and Nightwing show up and chase the Joker away.

The Joker also kidnaps, like, all the babies in No Man’s Land, and also sets up a bunch of bombs, sending Batman and his allies racing on a search across Gotham

Sarah Essen (Gordon’s Wife) is shot and killed by the Joker

December 31st (and at midnight January 1st)

Sarah’s funeral happens.

Batman thwarts Lex’s plan to own all of Gotham with the help of Lucius Fox

No Man’s Land ends.

(Whew, that was like 2000 words of timeline.)

Appendix 1: Just how long did Tim spend in Gotham?

(Yes this timeline has appendices. I’ve put far too much thought into everything)

But wait! Remember how I said we’d come back to Tim calling his dad? That time is now. At some point in this timeline, pressured by public opinion, the president issues an executive order to extract Tim from No Man’s Land. The thing about this plot point is that I have *no* idea when it happens. It could happen anywhere between three weeks after Tim enters No Man’s land (so about day 210) to December.

If we go solely off the Robin comics, roughly two weeks after Tim enters No Man’s Land, he becomes a major new story and an unspecified amount of time later (though one that feels short) he is extracted. (The grass is green and there are leaves on the trees in the art implying summer or early fall at the latest).

However, in the main bat comics, Tim is shown popping up here and there in supporting roles until literally the end of No Man’s Land. We do know, at minimum, that Tim is out of No Man’s Land in time to spend Christmas Eve with his dad (before somehow sneaking out and into No Man’s Land in time to help out with the whole chasing down the Joker drama). There’s a panel where they sort of vaguely make a reference to the fact that Tim has been sneaking into No Man’s Land to help out Batman, but no indication as to how long that’s been going on.

So, in conclusion. Tim is extracted from No Man’s Land whenever is most convenient for whatever story you want to tell. I think in my personal timeline, I’d put it at roughly day 300 after the Batman and Gordon reconciliation to have it line up with Luthor putting PR pressure on the government, but honestly canon is so contradictory on this point that it could go any way.

Appendix B: My Personal Ideal No Man’s Land Timeline

So, as mentioned above. I will accept the New Year’s Black Monday date for some canon purposes. That doesn’t mean I have to like it. My ideal timeline (a.k.a the one I’m going to use when I end up writing fic) would end up extending No Man’s Land so that it begins earlier and lasts longer:

Late October/Early November: Day zero of No Man’s Land

Batman enters on Day 100 so roughly February

Day 127 of No Man’s Land (The land war, tail end of winter) lands in late March

Day 189 (Bats assemble, First day of summer) is placed in late May (a little early, but we can go more metaphorical here)

This is about where those extra months I added go, during all the vague Bat stuff that goes on before Luthor enters Gotham

Luthor still enters Gotham in November

All the Christmas stuff goes down the same.

No Man’s Land still ends on New Year’s Day for the symbolism.

#no man's land #batman: no man's land #comics #barbara gordon #helena bertinelli #jim gordon #timeline #reference #comics timeline #tim drake #the cooler gotham antihero #this is long #like nearly 3000 words long #carthago delenda est #dc #bats + birds + affiliated

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