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a-court-of-moonlight-and-ire · 4 months

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Okay, second post, this ones mostly about Feyre because honestly, as of chapter 3 I havent really noticed Tamlin being out of character and from what Ive heard his character assassination was supposed to happen very quickly. Idk, right now he just seems like the same guy but traumatized although I'll fully admit that I didnt care that much for him outside of the Feylin romance (which was pretty sweet but too boring for me) so maybe I just didnt pay enough attention to him to fully grasp his character

Feyre is frustrating to me right now because I dont think shes out of character either, right now shes also just the same woman but traumatized, but like, I already know the extent to which her character will be bent for the sake of Rhysand. In these first three chapters she literally thinks something along the lines of "What's there for me to do but sit at home and spend Tamlin's money" Tell me, what does she end up doing in the night court huh????

Another thing thats frustrating is that Feyre clearly has issues communicating her feelings and wants, I know because I also had issues with that, and instead of learning that very valuable skill of telling others about your inner world and trying to work on her relationships (with both Tamlin and with her sisters), shes just gonna end up with a guy who can read her mind so theres no need for her to challenge herself and grow in any way. Yay. One thing especially stuck out to me in this regard was her attituide towards wearing dresses. Feyre does not like wearing dresses, its not like she never got to wear them back at home even though she wanted to, she just doesnt like wearing them in her day-to-day life, but she feels like she has to because she thinks its what Tamlin wants and because she thinks that if she wears pants its gonna somehow signal to the citizens of the spring court that something is incredibly wrong. But again, she doesnt tell anyone this, she doesnt ask Tamlin if he can just explain to everyone that everything is fine and that Feyre just has an unconventional way of dressing, which he would probably be fine with if its still the same guy from the first book. And it doesnt even seem like Tamlin directly made any kind of comment to her about the dresses she wears, she just saw that he was happy when he saw her wear them, which couldve well been him being happy to see her in general but she doesnt even consider that

Theres also the fact that its very unclear what she wants/what her problem is. Now, this actually isnt something that bothers me that much on its own, Feyre is traumatized and lost, obviously she doesnt know exactly what she wants at this point beyond "the situation Im in sucks and makes me feels bad, I want to get out", I think what bothers me is mostly the knowledge that Tamlin is gonna get blamed for a lot of this stuff when its really not his fault.

And I do want to make it clear that I dont think hes doing a great job handling this situation, I know a lot of people in the acotar critical sphere find his actions understandable and justifiable from his perspective and thats true, but hes still doing a bad job handling Feyre's emotional state. Like, one of your beloved's main issues is that she feels horrible because she feels trapped at home, for the love of god just let her go outside on her own. Maybe send her to village thats far inland or close to the border to the mortal realm, surely those monsters are not gonna manage to come that far if youre all going on patrols to kill them as soon as possible. And even if they do, the people of any village are gonna bend over backwards in order to protect their capital c Cursebreaker, shes gonna be fine

But, to get back to my original point, even if Tamlin was a daemati or whatever like Rhys and could read her mind the way she needs it to be read, he would still not be able to figure out what exactly Feyre needs right now because she doesnt know it herself! I literally read all of her thoughts and I dont know! Does she want to help others and be responsible for a whole bunch of people because its what shes always known to do? Does she want to avoid resonsibility for now because she wants to recover from her traumatic childhood of having the responsibility of keeping her family alive on top of all the new UTM-trauma? Its hard to say and that makes sense for Feyre at this point in her life, but she cant just blame people for not understanding her when she doesnt properly understand herself and refuses tl verbalize her feelings

Anyway, thats it for today, hope you enjoyed this

#anti acomaf #anti sjm #anti feysand #feyre critical #tamlin critical #flames and darkness liveblog

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manykinsmen · 3 months

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What the grid might look like in 2025

so i've had my thinking hat on about this and i wanted to come up with a semi-realistic hypothetical, based on what i know about the teams and what i would do in their shoes. i'll try to give solid justifications of why and how sure i am, as well as a few options if multiple seem possible.

so we already know what a few teams will look like, short of any broken and bought out contracts (i'm listing drivers alphabetically by surname, i don't want to speculate on any first/second driver deals):

ferrari: lewis hamilton, charles leclerc

mclaren: lando norris, oscar piastri

this is a given, there's a small chance that norris or piastri coul be bought out but i don't think any team would feel the need to do that. lets start with some that i think might keep the same lineup.

aston martin: fernando alonso, lance stroll

as much as the alonso to mercedes rumours are entertaining, i doubt there's much reality to them. mercedes is obviously backsliding and alonso's age means that he can't be a long-term solution. likewise, toto wolff is a control freak and fernando alonso is not someone he can control. alonso seems happy at aston martin, which is steadily improving as a team. stroll's contract will run until he personally is done with f1, and i can imagine alonso going the same way. the only danger here is one of them getting bored and retiring or moving to a different series.

sauber (i'm not calling it that): valtteri bottas, zhou guanyu.

this might seem weird but sauber's not looking to do much but stay afloat until audi takes over in 2026. changing the lineup to get a bigger name would mean spending money, which i imagine they really don't want to do. changing the lineup to bring in a rookie would risk the results that they have, and in any case, their major issue is vehicle reliability. bottas and zhou both score pretty well for the vehicle they have, zhou seems to be steadily improving under bottas' mentorship, they get along well and are a stable, reliable pair. they also are both pretty decently sponsored and unlikely to be poached by another team. even if a bigger name came calling (which feels unlikely), they'd probably want more money than sauber are willing to spend. i'd call this pretty likely for 2025, but 2026 onwards is anyone's guess.

so this is where it starts to get a little funky.

mercedes: alex albon, george russell OR george russell, carlos sainz jr

i'm 50-50 on this one. we know russell is a done deal pretty much and mercedes aren't the kind of team to swap both drivers at the same time. looking around at who is available to fill the hole left by hamilton, i'm pretty convinced that they're only serious options are albon or sainz. we've already ruled out alonso. bottas is a very distant possibility, but it would be pride-wounding for toto wolff to go back to him, especially knowing he would be forced to offer bottas a multi-year contract if he really wants him. ocon has a history with mercedes, but hasn't really been providing results with alpine, and seems to be slowly falling out of favour. likewise mick schumacher's been out of the car for a year after failing to impress at haas (and seems to be falling out of love with f1 himself). the team is slowly backsliding and needs someone that they know can deliver results.

if it were me, i'd be picking sainz. he's the only non-verstappen driver to win a race in the last season and has driven a front-running car recently. they'll probably even get him for cheaper than his actual value given he'll be desperate for a decent seat. however, as we've said earlier, toto wolff is a control freak. albon comes from unofficial mercedes junior team williams, meaning we're less sure of his capabilities, although he has impressed there. he has a very good relationship with russell, which gives him a serious advocate. there's a possibility that red bull might try to poach him, but he already has a very strained relationship with them.

if i have to choose, i'd suggest albon is slightly more likely. but it's going to be a photo-finish.

red bull: alex albon, max verstappen OR carlos sainz jr, max verstappen

sorry to all the ricciardo fans out there, but i reckon whoever's not at mercedes is gonna end up at red bull. red bull have been in a bit of a quandry over their second driver for a while and i'm not 100% certain that perez is even going to last the entirety of 2024. i can't imagine perez will have many teams desperate to scoop him up either, given just how much he's underperformed in the best vehicle on the grid, that he's one of the oldest on the grid, and the fact that he's already driven for so many of them. there's always a possibility of somewhere like haas having a go, but there's about to be a lot of seat shuffling, and i can see perez losing out entirely unless he pulls out something spectacular in 2024.

red bull are also experiencing something of an internal power struggle. as much as christian horner is slowly removing power from helmut marko, that process is not yet complete. horner clearly was teeing up ricciardo for promotion back to red bull in 2025 but there are two big problems with this: helmut marko isn't enthused and also, all of that rested on the assumption that the lineups at the front-running teams wouldn't change until 2026. oops. red bull might be top dog now, but that can't always be the case and they are right to frightened of a hamilton/leclerc pairing at ferrari. i would have expected them to attempt to poach norris or piastri, but mclaren's managed to lock that down. russell poaching is about as likely as san marino winning the football world cup. alonso would be too much for them to handle. what options does that leave them with?

well. if it were me, by the rules of engagement of the red bull driver's academy, i'd be promoting tsunoda, who's been holding the junior team together for a while now, but they've shown exactly zero interest in doing that. there's also ricciardo, who is something of an unknown quantity with his age and injured hand, though he was decent in the past and is well-liked. sainz is now unexpectedly available, and though he has something of a turbulent history with the team, it's not as recent or as insurmountable as albon's history. there's going to be something of a weird bidding war that happens here. unless ricciardo can really truly impress in 2024, i'd say he's unlikely to remain the favourite. based on my feeling that it will be albon at mercedes in 2025, i'd have to say i think sainz is most likely here.

williams: logan sargeant, frederik vesti

so, i think the person that's going to be luckiest out of the seat disaster dominos that we're currently witnessing is actually logan sargeant. why? well, sargeant had a pretty terrible start in his rookie season of f1 and very nearly lost his seat to fred vesti. before all of this began, sargeant new he was really going to have to deliver in 2024 or face being out on his ear. now, some of that pressure is off. it seems pretty certain that either mercedes or red bull will snap up sargeant's teammate albon, creating a space at williams. teams are usually pretty reluctant to replace both drivers at the same time unless they absolutely have to (it's a better the devil you know, controlling the variables conundrum). changing drivers at all is always a risk, especially promoting a rookie given how steep the f1 learning curve is. williams is a rookie pipeline team, meaning they're far more likely to promote a rookie than take on a driver from elsewhere on the grid. the favourite to replace sargeant was vesti, ergo, sargeant gets a stay of execution and vesti gets his seat.

potential alternatives? well, if logan sargeant has an absolute clanger of a second year, he will lose his seat and there won't be anyone looking to take him off williams' hands. there's always the possibility of a new f2 hero usurping vesti as favourite, or being promoted alongside him in a rare-double rookie event (assuming sargeant performs poorly). there's also the possibility of williams snapping up a backsliding driver, which they have a history of doing. if that were the case, i'd be looking at ocon or gasly from alpine as likely candidates. difficult to call it a backslide, but picking up yuki tsunoda is also not beyond the realms of possibility

toro rosso (i am not calling it that): daniel ricciardo, liam lawson

controversial here, but i think a driver will be leaving this team at the end of 2024 and it may not be who you think it is. with all the chaos at the front of the grid, i think daniel ricciardo might be the big loser, short of the people that will lose a seat entirely. which is just his luck lately. i've explained why i don't think he'll be getting the red bull seat above (short of having an incredible season in 2024). i also don't really think there's anywhere else for him to go. he's swallowed his pride enough to come back to red bull, he'll swallow his pride enough not to rage quit the entirety of f1, probably. in any case, helmut marko has suggested that ricciardo has got a long-term contract.

if i were yuki tsunoda, i'd be looking for an out. red bull's about to have a too many drivers, not enough seats conundrum. they've really wanted to promote liam lawson since he did so well subbing in for ricciardo last season and thought they had the perfect set up. now things have changed. red bull have shown no real interest in yuki's career - he's not being teed up for that red bull seat and there's no real future for him with them. he's in real danger if ricciardo doesn't get that promotion. where do i think he's going to, well, fortunately, i think he'll have options, which we'll talk about below.

alpine: pierre gasly, yuki tsunoda OR jack doohan, esteban ocon

oh boy oh howdy this team is not looking good. if the rumours are to be believed, nobody's happy with the current lineup at alpine. gasly and ocon hate each other and the management hate that they have to deal with it and everyone hates the results. something has to give in this team.

as we've said though, teams hate changing too many variables at once. the management at alpine is in constant crisis, so they'll probably be looking to retain one of their current drivers. but who? well, gasly did achieve better results in 2023, but only by four points and while the car had lots of reliability issues, ocon wound up retiring because of them more often. they were both on the podium once. gasly might have more grace as the new boy, but ocon has had longer to cultivate friendships. it's really even stevens and will come down to results in 2024 and relationships with team personnel behind closed doors. we don't have that information at the moment so this one is officially too close to call. i'd be worried if i were either though, because neither really impressed the grid last year and seats are scarce.

who do they bring in to fill the gap though? well, as discussed above, if i were tsunoda i'd be looking to move. if gasly is the driver retained, tsunoda would have an advocate in the team and be a safe bet for not causing inter-team drama. if ocon is the driver retained, the tsunoda move would seem unlikely. alpine will probably look to promote a rookie (like they wanted to do with piastri) and the best option in their driver's academy is jack doohan, who as rumour has it has been garnering a lot of good will in the team by doing the vitally important job of stopping gasly and ocon from killing each other. there's an outside option of poaching a visibly frustrated theo pouchaire from the ferrari academy, but pourchaire is developing a reputation as a drama queen, the last thing alpine needs.

haas: oh god this is complicated

things are up in the air with haas in a big way, for multiple reasons. firstly steiner got the boot, secondly there's rumours that andretti will attempt to buy out haas given that f1 has turned down their application for a team, thirdly, gene haas absolutely will not invest in this team in a way that allows it to achieve anything.

firstly, and i'm sad to be saying it because i love him,i think magnussen will be leaving f1 at the end of 2024. there's a few reasons: magnussen is not exactly hot property and he's been at haas a long while. his biggest advocate in steiner is now gone and the team is going to be desperate for sponsor money, which magnussen does not provide oodles of. some more positive reasons: magnussen has two small daughters that he is worried about missing pivotal moments with (and the eldest of which will be starting school in 2025, so won't be as easy to travel with) and has expressed interest in other series which are less demanding in terms of the number of races and amount of travelling. i'm very sad about it because i've always thought magnussen deserved better and didn't get his fair shot, but also i think he'll be leaving with a smile because there are other things in his life that are more important and worthwhile to him now.

hulkenberg is more of a questionmark. he also has a child of the same age, but has been less vocal about the difficulties of parenting and racing simultaneously. however, he is also older than magnussen and as much as teams typically hate the double driver swap when it isn't absolutely necessary, haas have shown themselves as willing to do it, and although it's a baby out with the bathwater move in my opinion, it would be very much in keeping with gene haas's attitude. i wouldn't be surprised if hulkenberg also looses out.

who will replace them? good. fucking. question. if andretti swoop in and buy the team, almost certainly colton herta, an indycar driver who's been linked to the andretti f1 project repeatedly. if not? your guess is as good as mine. they'll probably sweep up the leftovers. if gasly, ocon or tsunoda find themselves out of a seat, there will almost certainly be space for them at haas, maybe even perez. of these, if pourchaire can't find an opening elsewhere, there's probably also space for him at haas, along with any number of promising rookies. the only person i'm confident it won't be is mick schumacher. of these, gasly would be very much appreciated at haas with his delicious crypto sponsors.

#f1 #f1 2025 #whole grid tag

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kijosakka · 2 months

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how. how would i even write out a proper fic of dramaturgy au,,

cutting this off bc i got too caught up in myself and rambled

ok umm,, dramaturgy as an au is just so character study-ish and generally character-focused,, plus the initial developments made on island are kiinda important to the cast dynamic?? so as i see it there are a few options:

A: rehash/go through the unchanged plot of island, the TDDDDI special, some eps of WT, using it to develop the Situation from other characters perspectives while maybe having one or two to emphasize noahs characterization

it gives a lot of time for character developments outside of noah himself, and time to reinforce noahs own characterization using that outside perspective,, but could potentially get boring/long-winded, since nothing different happens and its literally just Characters Having Screentime

^ maybe sub a full going-through with character vignettes and specific scenarios throughout island/the special/celeb. manhunt or after TD/eps of WT??? i guess you could also slot smth like this in with the other ideas aswell

B: begin the hypothetical fic post-jamaica challenge and leading into london, use it to exposition some minor things and generally establish characterization before getting into challenges and actual canon divergence

it doesnt drag on (as much atleast), gives you enough time with enough cast members to establish what the others think of noah and what noah thinks/how he behaves and why (probably slot in his distrust of alejandro here??), more challenges gives noah more chances (and reasons) to break character, though the character development has to be slow and conflict should probably be built up (but im kinda partial to this one ngl)

C: kindof half-baked but beginning in london (i’m imagining literally at his eel line), where hes eliminated that episode, but comes back via comeback challenge; arc kicked off by being so pissed off that he has to come back and do the Same Shit yet again (and probably because of producer-rigging. again.)

the conflict/character dynamics would move a little faster, its less to trudge through and figure out canon changes like the butterfly effect of noah staying in the game in london, but having less characters to have relationships/interactions with (but making the ones had can be more developed/rounded as a result), less Time in general, the original idea of noah ‘unmasking’ alejandro is kiiinda less impactful this late into the game?? slightly i feel like

or D: even more half-baked than C and kinda just 'possible' and feeling out of place, but you could have noahs arc happen in all-stars instead (smth smth the audience was vv dissatisfied with how he ranked in WT and so he gets brought back)

^ this is mostly bc i like the motif of noah having eel-pond related scars and seeing it as a physical reminder of where 'acting like the camera isn't there' can get him (but you could potentially fit this into the C idea, posing it more as a bitter feeling/theme rather than a motivation to continue his facade)

i dont really like this one from a storytelling standpoint, and it doesnt make much sense since theres no character motivation via unmasking alejandro since everyone already knows at this point?? idk it is there though

umm yeah thats all ive got, i guess you could also mismatch ideas like B&C so the fic starts post-jamaica but noah still gets eliminated, or have noah eliminated after london but still winning the comeback challenge and coming back swearing vengeance (within his own head mostly) or smth like that

i kinda wanted to just put this Out in the World and let it simmer before i start combing through WT to make the allotted ‘official’ canon changes of this au lol

(and not to mention theres still the issue of the actual Ending,, does he win?? is his winning both symbolic and the first genuine, intentional break of character he makes, to the audience and his peers beyond the unintentional ones hes made along the way???

smth smth character growth, hes learned how to let himself break character but now hes learning to do it intentionally too??? < im partial to that but im also biased towards noah and any hypothetical win of his

^ or does he lose?? and his ending watching the finalists parallel the island bit where he Did Not Care but now??? idk idk the longer i think the more i like the whole symbolic win thing but in terms of storytelling/the Themes, does it Work. i do like to think so

the original draft of this idea has noah not in fact winning but it also had a strangely,,,,, vindictive tone?? that might not be the word but the Themes were different and noah was more scheme-ish rather than defense mechanism-having so im thinking the ending should change as well)

#heavy handed symbolism save me heavy handed symbolism #actually the longer i think the more partial i become to the symbolic win thing #but again: noah bias. but again again: my au my rules #/lh. i am open to literally any input or suggestion anyone wants to throw at this #this my first time posting about little aus i have. i think its Fun #perhaps i should Share more often………#ive had so many canon diverging daydreams you cant even Begin to understand #hmm anyway #dramaturgyAU #total drama #td noah

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pammyloumendkens · 1 year

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i think shawbrina is clearly planted and staged. shawn leaving looking so bored and on his phone while sabrina’s publicist guiding him is a little weird. i am not a mendes army or sabrina fan but a music fan. the timing is so weird it is clearly pr. wat do u think will happen?

2THIS "Anon":👀🤔WT🤬 🧐RU Frettin' Aboot🙄,🙃😒ANYWays🤨🤷‍♂️🤷‍♀️:🤨UR NOT A Part Of The Mendes Army😒,😣NEITHER PER SÉ😖;😕😟DO U Take A🤬Interest In Sabrina🤨,🙃SO🙄;🤨My Q 2U😝=🤔WHY🙄THE🤬RU Gettin'🤨SO🤬WorkedUp🧐In THIS🤨"Shawbrina"-Thing🤷‍♂️🤷‍♀️🤦‍♂️🤦‍♀️

&THIS1 GoesOut2 THE Rest:SO,THIS=A MashUp,Consistin' Of WHAT My Comments R On THESE Followin' Posts/"Anons": https://www.tumblr.com/pamelagramm/711400001317797888/party-time?source=share https://www.tumblr.com/dreamingof-utopia/711402997772697600/asks-are-open-so-ask-away?source=share https://www.tumblr.com/dreamingof-utopia/711403300762828800/shawbrina-seen-leaving-mileys-launch-party?source=share https://www.tumblr.com/dreamingof-utopia/711404088624037888/nice-i-do-believe-theyre-pr-his-team-is?source=share https://www.tumblr.com/dreamingof-utopia/711425897086025728/how-funny-is-that-when-she-announces-the-deluxe?source=share https://www.tumblr.com/dreamingof-utopia/711426843667054592/i-think-youre-jumping-to-conclusions-by-saying?source=share https://www.tumblr.com/dreamingof-utopia/711585635566272512/at-this-point-all-the-harassment-and-speculation?source=share https://www.tumblr.com/dreamingof-utopia/711604771775250432/yknow-shawnie-boy-always-saying-he-likes-older?source=share https://www.tumblr.com/dreamingof-utopia/711604992656752640/you-know-when-you-like-someone-and-then-they-do?source=share https://www.tumblr.com/dreamingof-utopia/711605083807367168/i-dont-think-hes-shawn-over-camila-but?source=share https://www.tumblr.com/dreamingof-utopia/711605330686132224/whenever-shawn-stops-doing-pr-and-finds-the-woman?source=share :🙄O🤬C😒:🤔WT🤬ELSE🧐COULD/WOULD🤨IT B🤷‍♂️🤷‍♀️,🙄😒BUT🤨A🤬PR-Stunt🤷‍♂️🤷‍♀️:🙄THE🤬Timin'😒=SO🤬OFF🙃,🤔WHEN🤨IS😣THE🤬RIGHT😖🤬Time🧐,🤨THEN🤷‍♂️🤷‍♀️;I👂U Askin':🙄"Their"🤬Time🤨WILL🤬B🤨,😏AS🤬SOON😜AS🤬HELL=🤬Freezin'🙃THE🤬OVER😉😝...🤔👀THE🧐Lip-Bite🤷‍♂️🤷‍♀️:🤨WELL🙄,😞I🤬DO🤬Notice IT😒&🤨THAT😒2Me😞-KNOWIN' Him-🙄Says😬He🤬Feels😣Nervously UNComfortably OUTTA Place Ashamed😖,😒He's🤬Bein' Forced😣In2 THIS "Shawbrina"-PR-Stuff😖😞;🤨I🤬MEAN🙄:🤔COULD🧐THAT Encounter(At Miley's Album-Release-Party)🤨REEEAAALLLYYY🙃HAVE POSSIBLY😬Been MORE😣Cringy😖🤷‍♂️🤷‍♀️,😁NOW🤨ALL u🤬😣Fakers😖;🙂R🤬Welcum2 Cum At Me😉&😜Give IT ur🤬Best Shot😏😝,🤨BUT🤬🙏:😜HAVE THE🤬Balls2NOT Do IT AS A🤬"Anon"😝;🤬COME🤬AWN😏&🤬TELL Me🤨:🙃They Were JUST Havin' A LoversTiff&TYPICALLY Him,He STILL Holds Doors Open4 Her...😒&😠😡O🤬C😤:🙄KEEP😞THE🤬ON🤬😣"Assumin'"😖Shawn=Gay-🤬🙄KNOWIN'🤬WELL🤦‍♂️🤦‍♀️(😝🙄IF y'all🤬WERE🤬REALLY🤨A Part Of The Mendes Army😜),🙄HOW😒THAT🤬💩=😣Makin'😬Him🤬Feel😖😞;🙄He IS Gay,Okay🤨;'CAUSE Of Judgin' By THESE2 Sayings:THE Good 1s R EITHER Taken,OR Gay+THE Good 1s ALWAYS Go 1St...I'VE Cum From A Gay Guy's Funeral SaturDay&😒He Was😞ALSO🙄2🤬Good+Naive🤨,😣4THIS🤬World😖...👍&I🤬FULLY Stand By Shawn's Opinion/Explanation Of Bullyin'/Jealousy👌,🤔SO🤨;😜IMMA GONNA🤬👀/Take IT AS A🤬Compliment😏:👍My Bud&Me R On THE RIGHT🤬Path👌&😉R Executin' Our Jobs🤬CORRECTLY😝,😏We🤬REALY KNOW Him&🤬💗&👍Appreciate Him👌4WHO&HOW He=&ISN'T😉&🤨IT'S Bcum🤬CLEAR 2Me😞:😣NO1 else🤬DOES😖,🤨I🤬SWEAR😞:🙄I'VE Had people Cum 2Me With🤬💩Like😒:"I don't believe he really is,who he wants everyone to believe he is","He's my ideal,but I don't know why","I believe Shawn & I would be/make a good fit/work well together,but I've got nothing in common with him"&😣Projectin' personal-Issues On(2) Him😖;🤪🤷‍♂️🤷‍♀️STILL🙃🤪THOSE🤬🤪Same🤬🤪people🤦‍♂️🤦‍♀️😣R ALSO Sayin' Stuff Like😖🤨:"I want him","He's my bf/husband/TLOML"&😒THEN🙄THERE=THAT🤬😣"My"/"Ur" Shawn-Thin'😖:🙄😜THERE'S ONLY1 Shawn😝🤨,😏😜IT'S ALWAYS GONNA B THAT Same Shawn😝😉;👍'He's🤬NOT EVER🤬GONNA🤬Change👌,🤨'CAUSE He🤬ISN'T🤬🤪...😒NOW🙄,🤔I Wonder🧐;🤨IF THIS🤷‍♂️🤷‍♀️: https://www.tumblr.com/dreamingof-utopia/711519438332166144/sooo-very-off-topic-but-i-heard-dr-jocelyne?source=share 🤔=🤨Aboot🧐THIS🤷‍♂️🤷‍♀️: https://www.instagram.com/p/CiToqIBhLx7/ Here's My Edit,BTW: https://www.tumblr.com/pamelagramm/695041453558218752/shawn-in-los-angeles-2day?source=share...😒HERE'S🤬Hopin'😞:🙄Both Their Teams🤬WILL🤬🙏End/Stop THIS WHOLE🤬😣Stunt-Situation😖,🙄REEEAAALLL🤬SOON😬;😒'CAUSE🙄:🤨EVEN WHEN He=👀With Some1 Of THE Opposite Sex😞,🤨🤬Gay-Rumours R🤬STILL🤬Surfacin'😠😡😤+😒IT'S NOT🤬BlievAble🙄,😞ANY🤬Way🙃;🙄WHEN THE person They're Linkin' Him 2,🤨=🤬COMPLETELY SOOO🤬NOT His🤬Type🙂😀😃😄😆😅😂🤣😁🙃...🙄THAT'S🤬WHAT I🤬😖KEEP TRYIN'2 Make🤬CLEAR😖:😒He's🤬NOT🤬OVER😣WHAT🤬Happened😖With 3"women"🙄THAT😒=THE🤬Biggest🤬Reason🤨4Him🤬Feelin'😩THE🤬Way😞He🤬DOES😫...#😉KEEP THE🤬🤪😒🙄😜Stupid/Dumb/Ignorant😞🤦‍♂️🤦‍♀️😝Q's A Cummin'😏

#Shawn Mendes #Shawn Peter Raul Mendes #Mendes Army #Accusations #Rumours #Speculations #Sexuality #Sexualisation #Sexuality-Accusations #Gay-Accusations #Sexuality-Rumours #Gay-Rumours #Sexuality-Speculations #Gay-Speculations #“Shawbrina”#Fake fans

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rpbetter · 3 years

Text

PTSD or C-PTSD?

Hopefully, you’re not one of the muns out there who has slapped a “PTSD” label on your muse(s) for drama only. You are, instead, treating this topic with respect and the realism that comes with that, not only having it accurately impact your muse when it’s convenient and “fun” for you. Well, that respect and realism includes actually knowing and applying the correct diagnosis and symptoms as well.

In your defense, if you have misdiagnosed your muse, common terminology in media and even among trauma sufferers is often just the blanket-statement of PTSD. Also, as the abbreviations imply, they do have things in common.

To help, I’m going to break down their differences and similarities, then provide some research links including personal accounts to help you get started.

PTSD

Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder most often comes from a single traumatic event.

What can be a traumatic event can differ widely, and reasonably so; we’re not all the same person, processing events and emotions the same way, or with the same formative life experiences. What might cause PTSD to develop in one person might be processed by another as a frightening or painful incident, but not one that has left them with PTSD. The symptoms, individual, and incident have to all be taken into account.

That being said, some examples would include:

having a severe accident

being mugged or in a store that is robbed

physical or sexual assault

being involved in a shooting, in any way

death of a loved one

an unexpected explosion or sudden, natural event like a mudslide or tornado

a severe natural or man-made disaster (building collapse, mass flooding)

events outside of oneself like witnessing a violent assault, murder, deadly car accidents, terminal illness or injury

Again, it is important to remember that individuals react in individual ways, and as such, their symptoms can express with some variation. Don’t just mimic the same presentations you’ve seen in media, research a variety of real experiences.

However they manifest, key symptoms of PTSD include:

Re experiencing the event by way of nightmares, flashbacks, and repetitive, intrusive, and intensely upsetting images, thoughts, and sensations. This is the most common symptom of PTSD, in which the person involuntarily and vividly relives the trauma.

Avoidance and emotional numbing, going to extremes to avoid not just potential triggers, but also finding any way possible to push memories of the event out of their minds. When the latter occurs and is extreme, the person is trying to feel nothing at all, seeking a path to emotional numbness. That can include substance use and abuse, self-harming, and other harmful behaviors.

Feeling on edge (”Hyperarousal”) is the ultimate inability to relax, constantly looking for threats, perceiving threats that are not to be found, and being easily startled. Some of the common issues with being locked into this state include difficulty sleeping or even insomnia, severe irritability and irrational seeming aggression, angry or aggressive outbursts, and finding concentration difficult to impossible.

Some other things that might develop with PTSD are:

Other mental health concerns like anxiety, depression, and/or phobias

as said above, harmful behaviors like self-harming and substance abuse

physical symptoms like headaches, stomach and digestive upsets, dizziness, and generalized pain

Like all disorders, PTSD is complex. I, again, implore you to research not only information put out by psychiatric professionals but also the experiences of real people.

C-PTSD

Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder occurs when a person experiences repeated, consistent trauma, especially at an early age.

That doesn’t mean that adults cannot and do not develop C-PTSD, they do, and for a variety of reasons; adult sufferers have the same points of origin in the diagnosis as children do. Additionally, it may take years for someone to seek help, feel their symptoms are severe enough to need to, or be able to extricate themselves from the situation in order to receive help of any kind. They may be an adult by the time this happens.

The important thing to remember about C-PTSD is that it isn’t a single traumatic incident, and you are more likely to have this form of PTSD if the trauma occurred early in life, it was inflicted by someone close to you, and/or was inflicted by someone you still see on a regular basis.

Some good examples to give you the idea include:

ongoing domestic violence

child abuse and/or neglect

being raised by a parent with a severe disorder like Narcissistic Personality Disorder

repeatedly witnessing violence or abuse

torture

kidnapping

being a part of a cult

being a victim of human trafficking or slavery

It isn’t “complex” because it is always across the board “more severe.” This isn’t simply “even worse PTSD,” and shouldn’t be treated like that. Its source is more complex, the development and embedded varieties of its impact are, and the ongoing treatment is.

Particularly when C-PTSD occurs in childhood, there are lasting effects on a person’s development. They have developed in an environment that constantly has them highly stressed both physically and psychologically, and in which they learn many ways of coping, lessening or negating harm, and so on, that leave them less than optimally functional and integrated in life outside the situation.

While the person has the symptoms of PTSD, they will additionally exhibit:

difficulty developing and/or maintaining relationships of any sort

intense, consistent feelings of worthlessness, shame, and guilt

problems managing and even understanding their own emotions

suicidal thoughts

dissociation

increased risk-taking behaviors

Those who have had their actual development rerouted to deal with the situations that generate C-PTSD have a higher incidence of physical symptoms, suicide, self-harm, substance abuse, and are at higher risk of repeat victimization.

They might go for some time without realizing that their daily experiences are neither the norm nor something sustainable, or how atypical their traumatic experiences were compared to those around them. It can sometimes take a serious life-event (suicide attempt, drug rehab, losing too many jobs, homelessness, or finding themselves in a genuine, loving relationship) for them to fully recognize something is wrong, and even then, their feelings of worthlessness, ingrained lack of self-confidence, and belief that they don’t deserve any better can prevent them from seeking help outside of themselves.

They may also believe that something is just “wrong” with them, that they are innately messed up, or that they have a different mental illness. And the unwillingness to open up to people, relieve events, etc. can additionally leave them unwilling to seek or continue care when they believe they have a different, underlying problem. Again, choosing to deal with this themselves through self-isolating, self-medicating, and seeking only relationships and jobs that will work within the framework of the disorder as it effects them.

Additionally, many sufferers of both C-PTSD and PTSD experience the same sense of societal shaming surrounding mental illness. They may struggle with denial, and refuse to seek assistance due to the stigma and all it entails.

Shared aspects of PTSD and C-PTSD

They’re both, obviously, severe, life-altering trauma experiences and resultant disorders. They both easily make the sufferer feel like the trauma and disorder is impossible or undesirable for others to deal with, that they are not worthy of being in close relationships, among many other similarities in experience living with either disorder regardless of widely varying traumas.

They share psychological and physical impacts, and there is a lot of overlap.

The core symptoms of PTSD are shared with C-PTSD:

relieving the trauma(s)

avoiding and emotional numbing

hyperarousal

The shared physical symptoms can include:

headaches

nausea, stomach ache, and digestive upsets

difficulty sleeping and insomnia

sweating, clamminess

chest pain and difficulty breathing

manifestations of low-grade to severe pain

dizziness

Shared behaviors can include:

difficulty concentrating to outright dissociating

self-harm

substance abuse

being hyper-vigilant, easily startled

may seem to be over-reactive to/in situations that others are perceiving as normal or not that big of a deal due to lower perception of personal emotions and lower emotional regulation

including explosive anger or defensiveness

development of anxiety and depression disorders, the symptoms thereof

Again, both PTSD and C-PTSD are serious disorders caused by trauma, and they both need to be treated with respect and accuracy when written into a character - be that an OC or a canon character. It is unfortunate, but these symptoms and the realities of life with either disorder are often portrayed badly in wider media, and the RPC often imitates what it sees.

PTSD and C-PTSD, like the incidents of trauma that created them (rape, child abuse, domestic violence, miscarriage, etc.), are not a plot-point, other point of interest, or a character trait, let alone a “character flaw.” They’re not something you only bring up for attention, to get your muse out of a bad spot, or to add dramatics when you’re bored in a thread. Neither are they something you need to attach to your muse simply to give them A Label. These are, I cannot stress this enough, serious topics, and they deserve to be treated that way.

You can do that by defining which variety of PTSD your muse may actually have, then adding research of both the disorder and how it impacts a variety of real people. Making your muse more realistic and being dedicated to sticking with it.

Below are some links to get you started on research! Please note, the real stories, as well as some information, may be graphic or triggering. Read responsibly.

C-PTSD

Out of the Storm - Personal Stories of C-PTSD

-Contains real stories from those with Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Their experiences have a huge range; bullying, childhood neglect and abuse, and sexual abuse and assault.

I Have Post-Traumatic Stress and Didn’t Know It - and You Might, Too

-Personal story of living, unknowingly, with C-PTSD. An especially great read for writers who have muses who hold a lot of responsibility in their daily lives, who may not realize their experiences are C-PTSD related, etc. Contains discussion of parental emotional abuse, mental illness and childhood trauma, and rape.

What is C-PTSD?

-Excellent resource for detailed breakdowns of C-PTSD giving without a clinical, impersonal tone. The definitions of the disorder itself, symptoms and how it manifests and impacts daily life, and much more. A highly recommended source, and one with further resources on-site.

11 “Habits” of People Living with C-PTSD

-Short breakdown of C-PTSD, followed by snippets of specific experiences in the words of those living with the disorder, a relatively short article.

PTSD

Rebecca’s Story: Living with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder

-Personal story of a woman living with PTSD from, in short, being stalked by a co-worker. It’s an excellent article, particularly for how mental illnesses sufferers are treated and portrayed, and how that adds another layer of difficulty to their lives. Obviously, this may be triggering to those who have been stalked, and includes mentions of graphic threats.

My experience of PTSD

-A personal story of medical trauma resulting in PTSD. Many of the PTSD stories you’ll find are from women and involve sexual trauma or harassment, in trying to find a variety of stories, I’ve found this one. By this point, you should be noticing many similarities in these stories, regardless of specific trauma.

Leaving the Battlefield: Soldier Shares Story of PTSD

-So many muses experience PTSD through battle-related incidents, and those depictions are not always accurate in media. This is a personal story about one soldier’s experiences. His perception of PTSD, denial, and shame at having the disorder is something that echoes throughout the previous accounts. So do the similarities of daily struggles to maintain to regular life. Before anyone wants to get Tumblr Nasty about it: there isn’t any “war propaganda” present in this story, the location of it is irrelevant to what you’re supposed to be learning here. It’s literally this man’s experience, don’t.

Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder

-Breakdown of symptoms and causes from Mayo Clinic, so obviously, this is more clinical-minded. Particularly useful for its lists of things like “symptoms of negative changes in thinking and mood” and increased risk-factor for other disorders.

I hope this helps you to assess and write more accurately your muses with C-PTSD or PTSD, and to consider these things more fully when having your muse experience a traumatic event in your plots.

-------

Please, remember when you are reading these accounts, and anywhere you might encounter PTSD sufferers; these are REAL PEOPLE. Treat them and their stories with respect. You’ll note that, unlike other posts on this blog, I didn’t advise you to approach the source. Many trauma sufferers won’t be comfortable sharing their experiences for the sake of your creative hobby. You may, at your respectful discretion, discuss this with close friends you know to be impacted by PTSD, just keep in mind that respect, discretion, and only bringing the topic up when they are comfortable with it, with specific questions, is necessary here. These are not fictional characters! Do not write someone’s real experiences into your character, thread, etc. verbatim, that’s...fucked up. Thanks in advance for being responsible, respectful adults, from a real life PTSD sufferer. -Vespertine

#rp help #rp advice #muse development #character development #writing advice #muses with ptsd #muses with cptsd #cptsd and ptsd post #muse inspiration #diverse muses #neurodiverse characters #rp better

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earnestly-endlessly · 3 years

Note

kind of an odd request — do you have fics where erik is grumpy with everyone else but a ray of sunshine with charles?

Hi anon, thank you for the ask. First and foremost, I'm so sorry for how long this took me but I've been searching for all the fics that come to mind that fit your request. Second, this is not an odd request because I love this trope so much. I mean, it's basically canon that he's grumpy with everyone except for his Charles, right? Anyway, I might add to this list later on, but I can't sit on this any longer and hope that you have found some fics that you enjoy!!

Fic Recs Where Erik is grumpy with everyone but a ray of sunshine with Charles

Twice as Blind – Darksknight

Summary: Erik is probably the biggest asshole on the face of the earth, and because of this, he'll probably die alone. Charles is a complete flirt and playboy and, probably, will never commit to anyone ever.

(The lesson here is that when you have two friends who are BOTH secretly seeing someone, well, it's probable that they're seeing each other.)

In the moonlight, on a joy ride – scarlettblush

Summary: Librarian AU. Charles is the young librarian and Erik is the college student who is completely besotted with him.

The Proper Care of Actors – Clear_Liqueur, Clocks, Etherei, afrocurl

Summary: Erik is an A-list action star who is notoriously difficult to work with, until the day he gets cast alongside Charles Xavier, rom-com darling who can charm the pants off movie audiences the world over and apparently even one Erik Lehnsherr. The paparazzi catch them out and about soon enough, and their real-life Hollywood movie romance becomes instant tabloid fodder.

Rumor Mill – ikeracity

Summary: Erik is the grumpiest, most foul tempered worker at Stark industries. His grumpiness is the stuff of legends.

So it's obviously the talk of the office when Erik is being made to go to the company party and he's bringing his husband. There's rumors flying round about how much of a masochist or equally antisocial bastard Erik's husband must be to put up with him. Others think he must be a meek mouse perhaps bullied by Erik.

What they weren't expecting was the confident, charming, adorable and unbelievably nice Charles that turns up on Erik's arm. What they certainly weren't expecting was how much Erik obviously adores his husband and how happy he is to let others see this.

Work/Life Balance – pocky_slash

Summary: Alex is pretty sure his weird, anti-social boss is a robot. Right up until the guy's adorable husband shows up. His adorable husband who happens to be a famous actor. His adorable husband who happens to be the very same famous actor who was the source of many of Alex's teenage fantasies.

Terrifying Domesticity – ishipitsobad

Summary: Erik is the most dangerous and notorious mafia boss around for miles, and yet the strangest things terrify him.

For example: his children, and his very pregnant mate.

Of kittens and teacups and love – Ren

Summary: Modern AU in which Charles and Erik are flatmates. Charles studies psychology and likes tea and chess and keeps bringing home stray kittens, and Erik lets him because he's maybe perhaps a little bit sort of in love with him.

Fools Rush In – LoveSupreme

Summary: Erik owns a cafe on the edge of campus and accidentally starts maybe-stalking a Biology Professor there.

Growing Pains – ikeracity

Summary: Twelve-year-old Erik Lehnsherr is an angry, closed-off foster kid with trust issues and a bad temper. Ten-year-old Charles Xavier is a lonely kid in boarding school who just wants a friend.

Logan pretends he doesn't think they're both fucking adorable.

Series

Home Together (The Finding Our Way Remix) – significantowl

Summary: Erik is not the sort of person other students strike up conversations with. His expression, his posture, every part of his manner say: Don’t talk to me. I don’t want to talk to you. But none of that stops the boy ahead of him in line with the collapsible white cane, and nothing can stop Erik from falling for him, like it or not.

Melted Ice Cream and Macaroni Art – pocky_slash

Summary: Everybody likes Charles. Nobody likes Erik. And that's really the source of Erik's doubts. Also, there's ice cream and a baby. Part of ‘the Daycare’ verse.

Walling in or Walling Out – stlkrchck

Summary: Erik stifles a sigh. Of course this is Mr. C. F. Xavier. Of course.

For the prompt: Charles and Raven are throwing a holiday party. Erik is the grumpy neighbor who is annoyed by how loud they are being. So he goes to complain, and Charles makes it up to him.

(Wise Men Say) Only Fools Rush In – wildelybroken

Summary: After reading a fic where Erik and Charles are super sluts, meet at what is presumably Raven and Emma's engagement party, and end up sleeping together, I made the following comment and just inspired myself.

"They start casually texting each other throughout the day, maybe while they’re bored or frustrated at work, and start out meeting up and sleeping together semi-frequently. And eventually they accidentally start dating without noticing it at first, not until Raven and Emma get them alone and are like “wtf you two super sluts are actually dating??” And at first they deny, but then they’re both like “holy shit, we are!” And they meet back at one of their places and they don’t have to say anything, they just look at each other and come together immediately, kissing passionately and ~making love~. In the middle of it they realise that’s what they’ve been doing for a long time now and they confess their love to each other and they live happily ever after because they deserve all the good in the world."

For Charles – Shigai

Summary: Tired of being told he has to find his 'heart', classical piano graduate Erik Lehnsherr decides to travel to Italy and drink from the famous Italian passion for music. While searching for it, he meets Charles Xavier, a graduate in Fine Arts who is basically travelling around the world perfectioning his technique, and who will turn his world upside down.

Together they will discover that, sometimes, what you thought you didn't need is what you needed the most.

Erik Hates People – Anonymous

Summary: Erik hates people- it's his rule, a way of living.

Sugar – humanitys_cutest

Summary: Erik glances at the clock for what feels like the tenth time in less than half the minutes. It feels like he's been in some meeting or other since the day started almost 10 hours ago, and he's had just about enough of listening to these pompous old men discuss what would be the best design for his building like they know anything about it. He tries as subtly as possible to massage his temples to assuage the building migraine, but he knows it's no use.

He just wants to go home.

Everyone Likes Charles – Rosawyn

Summary: '“Everyone who's met him likes him.” Cain's grin was even stupider than before. “Once you meet him, you'll see.”

It was almost like a challenge then. And damn. Erik hated saying no to a challenge.'

Still Going Strong – JackyJango

Summary: Speaking of forty-eight, Erik hates it. Hates it even more that others are aware of it. While he’s pragmatic enough to know and accept that aging is inexorable, the increase in number gives the people around him the freedom to pounce at him with questions, opinions and advice he'd fought to keep at bay all year.

Besides, Erik believes that youth is a state of mind, not a phase in one’s life.

You have a child’s mind in a man’s body, Charles constantly tells him.

But despite his age, Erik is healthy. He works out daily. His muscles are steel and he can dead-lift four hundred pounds. He can break bones without breaking a sweat. Most importantly, he can still carry Charles to the bedroom and fuck him senseless. And as long as Erik can do that, he’s perfectly happy.

All I know is pouring rain and everything has changed – hllfire

Summary: Charles meets Erik, the man he had heard about many times from his sister and some friends, on a rainy Sunday morning. The stories about Erik paint him as a distant and intimidating man, but Charles finds out that maybe the stories had been wrong.

How to Successfully Ruin Your Life – humanveil

Summary: Seventeen-year-old Charles Xavier accepts a job at his local café, expecting nothing more than a fun, new pastime. What he gets is a mysterious customer and a schoolboy crush.

Stolen – ishipitsobad

Summary: Erik is a miserable, grumpy, cantankerous bastard, and he has every fucking right to be. He drew the short end of the stick when he got the Underworld as his domain, and there isn't very much fun to be had in judging and governing dead souls who would rather be anywhere else but with Erik in the depths of Hell.

So when he meets Charles, brilliant and lovely Charles who is more popularly known amongst the mortals as Persephone, and feels the promise of something wonderful that could make his eternally doomed existence infinitely more bearable... you can bet all your drachmas Erik's not going to let Charles go any fucking time soon.

Erik Lehnsherr's Guide to Saving the Universe By Meeting Your Soul-Mate and Falling in Love in Less than 72 Hours – magneto, pangea

Summary:Army Pilot Erik Lehnsherr is just trying to enjoy his day off when a mostly naked person crashes through the roof of his car. Even more alarming, the strange falling naked person—who goes by Charles Xavier when he's not speaking an ancient dead language—brings tidings of the apparent potential end of the world, and begs Erik to help him put a stop to it.

Well. His mother has been nagging at him to go out and meet new people.

The Theory of Partnership Dynamics – Pangea

Summary: “Detective Lehnsherr, how wonderful to see you out on the job!” The fed in the front greets him as they draw nearer. He’s shorter than the other two by a full head, and he’s beaming at Lehnsherr as if completely undeterred by Lehnsherr’s paint-peeling scowl.

“What do the feds want?” Lehnsherr asks bluntly.

“You know I can’t tell you that,” the fed answers cheerfully. Then his gaze lands on Alex, and, impossibly, his grin gets even brighter. “Did you get a new partner?"

“No,” Lehnsherr says through his teeth while at the same time Alex says, “Yes.”

#fic recs #cherik fic recs #cherik #asks #earnestly answers #I'm sure there are waaaay more fics out there #might add more later

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stuff-from-the-void-matron · 3 years

Text

Laurel Wreaths & Animal Teeth (4)

(c!Technoblade x fem!Reader)

(people seem to like this for now but remember, no reblogs/comments then i’m gonna assume people lost interest. so show u enjoy this please!! <3 also someone drew fanart of Reader, check it out at the bottom! :3c)

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“Come ON Wilbur! Come with me to check out the huge village I found the other week!” shouted Tommy while making sure to get in his older brother’s way as much as possible. He figured if Wilbur was focused on him and not whatever ‘super important’ shit he was busy with then he’d join him.

Wilbur meanwhile was doing everything he could to sidestep and ignore said younger brother. Now usually he’d humor the much younger boy but Wilbur was sorta busy at the moment. There’s been murmurs of unrest within the L’manburg territory lately since new faces have joined their country.

Apparently they weren’t happy about the fact that Wilbur was a self appointed president, and likened him to a dictator because of it since no one got a say in his leadership role. Which Wilbur thought was highly unfair. He’d fought tooth and nail for his country, so they could have and enjoy all the freedoms to do as they pleased without Dream and his cronies breathing down their necks.

Everything he did he did for his country. But he didn’t want them to see him as some unsympathetic tyrant who didn’t listen to his people. He’s not Dream, he actually listens when they speak, even when they say they don’t like his self appointed role as president. So yes, Wilbur was sort of busy with more important things than goofing off and finding some random village. But instead of snapping he just sighed and said,

“Tommy, I’m working. We’re supposed to be running a country, remember?”

The aforementioned boy let out an aggravated sigh, he knows they have a duty to L’Manburg, he’s not stupid! But he also knows they need to be allowed to have some fun now and again too! Or they’ll go crazy! And Tommy was sure Wilbur would go mad if he stayed cooped up inside all the time working! So this was his way of dragging his brother out for his own good.

But Wilbur was being especially stubborn (wonder where Tommy got it…) and was refusing to budge.

“I don’t have time right now Tommy! Ask Tubbo or Fundy to tag along. I’m sure they’d love to go vandalize a village with you,” Wilbur distractedly said as he wrote down some notes in one of his books.

Tommy was tired of fighting Wilbur on this and decided to hell with it, he’d just take the L this time. So he scoffed and said “Whatever” in the most pissed off teen voice he could physically summon and turned away from Wilbur and stormed out of the brunet president’s house, making sure to slam the wooden door as hard as he could on his way out.

It seemed like all Wilbur did was mope around and WORK since they’d won independence from the Dream SMP. What the hell was the point of even FIGHTING for said freedom if Wilbur wasn’t even going to enjoy it??

Tommy pushed those thoughts away and went to search out Tubbo, he could always count on his best friend to follow him into some mischief! Unlike SOME people. And thankfully it didn’t take the rambunctious blond long to find his friend, and with a grin he ran and jumped on the shorter boy, making him yelp in shock and nearly fall. But then Tubbo saw who it was and started laughing and shoving the taller boy away half heartedly. But after goofing around a bit Tommy remembers why he’d searched out Tubbo in the first place.

“Oi Tubbo, come with me to this weird village I found the other week. I was gonna explore it when I found it but Wilbur said there was an emergency and I had to leave before I could,” he said as they both walked along the main path.

“Yeah sure, but why was it ‘weird’? Was it one of those ones that’s built somewhere stupid like half on a cliff?” Tubbo asked with a laugh.

The two laughed and Tommy explained that the village just looked different? Like there was no cobble! Which was ridiculous because in his opinion that was the best part of villages was all the cobble buildings. Not that he was biased or anything like an American.

But Tubbo just laughed and said sure, they could go check it out. He didn’t have anything else important to do today anyways. Tommy gave a triumphant ‘yeah!!’ because at least he got ONE of his friends to not be a total loser and go out to have some good old fashioned fun with him.

Tubbo told him to lead the way so they were off.

-0-

Many blocks away in your village you were getting out of your ‘shower’, which was really just a waterfall hidden by thick trees and hanging vines behind your temple home. But it was the best shower you’d ever used thanks to how the water fell over you in huge sheets. You’d honestly stay in it for hours if you didn’t hate being bored just standing there. But you did get bored, so you got out and began drying off.

Once you were dry you started getting dressed in your usual outfit, then once done you paused before reaching down to grab the newest item of your outfit..

Your mask.

...

After your… horn discovery the week before you’d just laid in bed all day for a couple days. Not leaving your temple for any reason, not even to shower or eat. You’d have been feeling worse if you’d actually needed food but thankfully you didn’t, so when you finally got your ass in gear and got up to bathe you only felt marginally like shit. At least you had until you went to go bathe…...

But on that first day up you’d just stared at yourself in the reflection of the water and sighed. You didn’t have the urge to cry anymore, so that was a good thing. But you also weren’t a fan of the new horns or glowing eyes you’d had since ending up here. You weren’t even sure what KIND of horns these were?? And… call you crazy but you SWEAR they were bigger than they were before your stint laying in bed..

They’d only been little nubs before, not even as big as your thumb! But now they were at least five inches long and sort of splitting at the tips? It looked weird and honestly felt even weirder what with that velvety texture covering them. You made the foolish mistake of grumbling to yourself,

“Things couldn’t get weirder, right?”

And as if the universe heard you… you discovered a new ‘appendage’ on your body while you started to wash your body off. You’d been lost in thought, just scrubbing yourself with a soapy washcloth when you’d started reaching around to wash your back, your washcloth brushed against something protruding from the base of your spine, right above your ass. This time you didn’t start panicking, you think you were still worn out from the days previous, so instead of freaking out you just slowly craned your neck around to see if you could glimpse the...thing.

A tail.

You blinked, shocked but also.. confused? What in the absolute fuck? Why? When?? This time there was no sobbing or breakdown, you were honestly just puzzled. Are you ever going to STOP growing animal traits or what? Under any other circumstances you might even call the tail cute. It was small, probably just smaller than your hand and about the same shape too. And the majority of the top of it was the same color as your hair, but the sides (and underside after you got curious enough to look under it) were a soft white. With how you were in water the tail looked rather unimpressive and you couldn’t identify what kind of tail it was, but if it was at all connected to the horns then maybe deer? Or caribou? Reindeer? The last two seemed more likely since those animals’ females actually grew antlers you think.

Having to adjust to all this new shit practically every other day was giving you a headache. With a tired sigh you rubbed the area around the base of your antlers, soothed slightly by how the action dulled your headache. But you couldn’t ignore the issue at hand, so you swallowed down your unease and instead just decided since you couldn’t control these… unnatural features then.. well, you’d just cover them up or since that wasn’t possible for the horns now you’d just disguise them?

You’d been stumped for a while on how to even DO that but eventually you’d gone down to the village to feed the animals and you’d watched the armorer leave his house to get started working for the day. And you’d noticed the mask he wore pushed up on his forehead. That’s when the idea for a mask hit you. But you didn’t know how to make or even craft a mask, so you’d gone to the armorer and asked him about it. It was hard to grasp what he was saying clearly but after the months living with the villagers you’d picked up some stuff and could understand them some.

So you let him show you how to make a standard iron mask like his, though the first one he’d made hadn’t fit you in the end so he’d made a second after tweaking the size a bit so it’d fit your face right, since your face shapes weren’t the same. But you were thankful and said so after you put it on. Though the eye holes still revealed your eyes, which you didn’t like. You asked how hard it would be to put reflective lenses in them to prevent your eyes from being seen.

That question turned into the armorer calling over the cartographer, the stonemason, and the shepherd oddly enough to help him out. They were murmuring and crowding around the armorer’s workstation while you watched from the edge of the porch where you sat idly. You didn’t want to hover over them like some busybody, so you sat patiently to see what they came up with together.

And after a while your patience was rewarded when they came over to show you the fruit of their collaboration. And it surprised you how gorgeous it was, which wasn’t fair since you had 4 skill masters working on it together for you.

The mask was actually very beautiful.

It was a white half mask that only covered your eyes, forehead, and upper nose/cheeks but left the lower half of your face bare. And you think it was simply painted white because it felt about as heavy as iron, but the part that amazed you was how it almost looked Venetian in design. On the forehead of the mask was a golden sun, and golden floral swirls came from the corners of the mask and curled near the cheeks and sides of the sun on the forehead, making the mask look elegant and almost vintage.

But the best parts in your opinion were the glass lenses in the eye holes. They were reflective and the same colors as your banner! You don’t know how the villagers did it but the edges of the lens were a goldish orange and the color faded into a violet in the center. You worried you wouldn’t be able to see through them but when you put the mask on you realized the lens only gave things a VERY slight blue/grey tint. So slight in fact that you could fully ignore it if you wanted.

And the second best part was some of the floral swirls actually swirled UP past the top edge of the mask and rested against your horns, giving the illusion that they were somehow part of the mask. Actually with the mask on you could almost trick yourself into thinking you were just wearing a cool looking Mardi Gras mask!

You clapped your hands in glee and couldn’t help the excited sound you let out as you gushed and told them it was perfect! They all let out bashful happy murmurs and generally looked shyly pleased with your praise. You tried to give them each some emeralds but they refused to take them, grunting and shaking their heads each time you attempted to push the gems towards them. Eventually you gave up and resigned to accepting the mask as a gift, but you’d definitely do something nice for them later, to make up for their hard work.

…

You’d taken to wearing the mask at all times when not in the privacy of your temple. Which wasn’t very hard to get accustomed to. The mask was lightweight and the lenses honestly helped shield your eyes from the glare of the sun so win/win. And it also made your horns, in your opinion at least, less in your face. Which was good because they were definitely still growing. You could tell. And the split in the tip was now more pronounced, making you wonder if they were like… reindeer antlers? It would fit with the tail currently growing out the base of your spine, said tail that now looked REALLY like a fluffy little deer tail since the hair/fur on it had dried.

One good thing was that your tail wasn’t long or huge and could actually be hidden relatively easily under a shawl you tied around your waist. So that was one less thing to worry about. Though your life would infinitely be easier if you didn’t have to deal with all this inhuman bullshit. But you supposed life wasn’t fair and expecting it to be was foolish.

“At least I’m not part some weird animal like an aardvark or something…” you mumble to yourself, trying to view this whole thing in a ‘glass half full’ sort of way.

You’d decided to relax and unwind from your recent discovery by just taking things easy for a while. First day since you got the mask and such you just chilled and started a small farm for yourself. You didn’t need the food but the process of building the farm and toiling the earth and then sowing the seeds was actually pretty therapeutic. The repetition of it all was pretty calming. Just you, your gardening tools, and the earth beneath your feet.

The days following were pretty much the same. You’d tend your garden first thing in the morning after your shower, then you’d go off to find something else easy to fill your time. You took up feeding the animals, making flower boxes and planters around the town to make it more colorful, potion brewing, and even fishing. Which was what you were doing right now actually.

You were sitting on the edge of the pond next to your temple, bare legs in the cool water and your back resting against the side of another grass block, an enchanted fishing rod you’d traded the town fisherman for sitting stuck in the ground next to you while you relaxed. The day was actually quite beautiful and nice. Sun streamed down over you from between the bamboo behind you, fluffy fat bees buzzed overhead as they hunted lazily for pollen, and you were close to dozing off.

“Hnn! Hnn! Hnnn!!”

At least you would have dozed off if you hadn’t heard one of the villagers sorta freaking out. You looked up and saw one of the farmers panickedly shuffling about at the top of the small hill to your left. You wondered if zombies got into the village again? But no it was sunny out, they’d be burning if they did. Illagers maybe? But how would they have gotten around the bamboo and prickly berry bushes?? Well there wasn’t anything else for you to do than do see what was wrong.

You put away your fishing rod, got up and dusted yourself off before hurrying up the hill after the villager. You trailed after them down the lantern lit path but so far didn’t see anything, but you perked up when you heard telltale sounds of one of the iron golems fighting something and taking damage. That put some urgency in your gait and soon you were running to see what was going on. You rush past the fletcher’s home and then the cartographer’s right after but nothing. Then you finally round the corner where the market is set up and see at the very end of the path next to the cleric’s church is the altercation.

You sprint down the path, yelling for the villager’s to stay inside until you ring the town bell as you run past them. You hear the doors slam closed behind you and you manage to get to the problem right as your iron golem gives one last cry before getting poofed. You gasp sadly and then glare when you hear cheering. A blond boy that was shorter than you hopped down from a dirt block tower and scooped up the fallen iron ingots the poor iron golem dropped upon its death.

You were so pissed that you ignored the nagging feeling in the back of your focus that said this kid looked familiar. It wasn’t until he finally turned to look at you that it hit you. Holy shit this kid looked… and sounded.. like that minecraft youtuber, TommyInnit.. Like eerily so. You’re glad you’re wearing your mask so he can’t see the deer in headlights (*ba-dun-ts*) look on your face at the sight of him. And your shock didn’t fade with him speaking. If anything it reinforced the idea that this kid was weirdly reminiscent of that youtuber.

“Holy fuck! You are a MASSIVE woman. Wait, who the fuck are you?!” he said in a loud tone of voice as he looked up at you. It made your eyebrows furrow. You were NOT that big! He was just short! You even crossed your arms and told him so, which earned a snicker from the little brown haired boy in dark green overalls next to him. The blond boy scoffed, looked fully offended, snarked back that you were about the same height as a ‘bloody fuckin’ iron golem!’ so yes you were huge.

You glared at the little TommyInnit look alike and instead of arguing about your height you started scolding both boys, which they hadn’t really.. expected? At least from the surprised looks on their faces (which still had the roundness that came from baby fat). The brunet rubbed his elbow and sort of toed the dirt under his feet while the blond crossed his arms and almost looked to be pouting from the scolding.

“My height isn’t the issue here! The issue is you two barging into my village, killing one of my iron golems, stealing the loot from it, and scaring my poor villagers!! What in the hell were you two thinking?”

The blond tried to cut in, to defend himself but he barely got out the first syllable before you held up your hand to signal for him to silence himself as you snapped,

“I do NOT wanna hear it! You treat others this way?? Like they’re nothing, like their possessions and peace of mind don’t mean a damn thing?! Shame on you both!!”

By the end the two boys looked properly scolded. The brunet wondered if THIS is what it felt like to get scolded by one’s mother, and if it was then he’d like to avoid it for the remainder of his life. And the blond meanwhile actually didn’t have anything to say, or more accurately he didn’t know what to say to not feel like he was in massive trouble.

You meanwhile were just annoyed at this point, so you held you hand out (causing both boys to give you wondering looks) before you demanded the iron ingots that the blond stole from your slain iron golem. He got all in a huff, saying he earned them and they were just ingots- but you slapped that train of thought down with an angry,

“EARNED?? More like STOLE! After you killed my iron golem! Now give them back! I have to use them to make a new golem to protect this village.”

The blond sputtered, face blooming red at being blatantly called out on his theft, before muttering in embarrassment and pulling the ingots out and practically tossing them at you. You caught them and returned them to your inventory before shaking your head at the two and saying they should leave if their only goal in your village was to kill and destroy property. The small brunet quickly spoke up and said,

“No wait, we didn’t come just to mess stuff up! We came cuz Tommy said he found this place last week and it wasn’t the usual village so we wanted to explore it.”

Your stomach churned at the name.. Tommy. This was getting weird again. Way too fucking weird. But you resisted clenching your teeth anxiously like you wanted, instead you raised an eyebrow they couldn’t see and shot back,

“Oh yeah? And how did that escalate into killing my iron golem?”

This time it was ‘Tommy’ who cut in and said it had been an accident! They’d apparently been looking around when Tubbo (you felt queasy now after hearing that name too…) started fighting a spider and Tommy came over to help him, but in the process he accidentally hit the iron golem, who got pissed and smacked him.

“I ran from the thing and towered up three blocks! I knew it wouldn’t let up so I had to kill it! S’not my fault the bastard was holding a grudge!!” Tommy said heatedly, arms still crossed defiantly.

You wanted to rub your temples in exasperation but couldn’t without removing your mask. And like hell you were showing these kids your weirdo inhuman eyes. Though… if they really were the characters from.. the videos you got hooked on? Honestly this whole thing was 10 times weirder than the stupid glowy eyes or even the horns or tail.. Like this has to be proof you’re really dreaming or in a coma or something. What other logical explanation could there BE? These kids aren’t real. Nothing here is. It CAN’T be. The real people behind these… minecraft characters? They’re not here. In this place.

Before you could do a kickflip off the edge of your sanity into a full on mental breakdown you took in a calming breath and pushed those thoughts away until you were alone to give it the proper attention. And maybe so you could have your panic attack in peace and quiet. But right now you had two kids causing ruckus in your village. So you just said,

“Yeah alright, fine. I’ll forgive you both THIS TIME. But don’t make a habit of causing trouble in my village. And you can look around and explore, just don’t steal anything or hurt any of my villagers or animals. Got it?”

The two boys nodded, happy to not have you giving them that Angry Adult Tone anymore. So you turned and started walking back to the middle of the village, calling for them to come on. You had to ring the village center bell to tell everyone everything was okay.

Both boys shared a glance before Tubbo smiled and started jogging after you, Tommy right behind him, both curious about you and your village.

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(a/n: YOOO SOMEONE DREW READER FANART AND IT’S FUCKING BOMB DUDES CHECK IT OUT!! (Reader looking heavenly~) uwu)

@salinesoot @lady-bee-fechin @kacchasu @putridjoy @lunawritesstories @galaxypankitty3030 @paradigmax @zachariethememerie @killmewithafanfic @trinity-1002107 @hufflepuff-demigod @truthdaze @exorcisms-with-elmo @redbloodtea @heythereimhaylz @olyink @jackalopedoodles @nikkineeky @artsimatsu

#technoblade x reader #technoblade #c!techno #dream smp #dsmp #mcyt x reader #c!tommy #c!tubbo #c!wilbur

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lovethisletters · 3 years

Text

Poly MC! hc for the: Demon Brothers!

This is my first time writing anything about poly relationships! So I'm a bit nervous! I took the time to do a bit of research about the subject...however I still have a lot to learn; if you find anything that might be offensive please let me know! Just know I didn't do it with any ill intentions and I'll make sure to correct my mistakes!

Also I didn't knew if you refered to a poly MC who is in a relationship with all of the brothers or how each individual brother would react to MC coming out as poly to them and later starting a poly relationship and how they behave in said relationship...so I did the latter bc I found it to be a bit more easy to write and the first option would have been way too long and I was worried it might come off as boring because of it :c (but maybe I'll try to edit it and then upload it...some day...idk)

so...here it is!

Keys: MC = your main character name

Summary: MC comes out as poly to the Demon Brothers and how they behave in a poly relationship!

Additional notes: MC is gender neutral!

TW: small mentions or implications of jealous/possessive behavior (they're very minimal, but still...just in case)

▪️▫️▪️▫️▪️▫️

Lucifer

Lucifer is probably the one you're the most nervous to talk to.

But when you finally find the courage to do so it goes...to put it mildly, a bit... weird.

He stares blankly at you like you just said to him that water is a liquid or something, he's not very...responsive.

His reaction might come off as rude, considering you spend all this time trying to figure out the "best" way to come out and talk about the possibility of starting a poly relationship.

But the reason why he's not talking much is because he's trying to avoid saying anything he might regret later, you see... he's trying to process his own feelings towards the matter.

Lucifer is someone who has lived for a long, looooooong time, so it's more likely than not that he's already experienced being in a poly relationship.

thing is...such relationship was more experimentation rather than something serious.

And now he has you...someone for who he'll be willing to die for...

He won't say it but deep down he feels like his pride has been bruised.

He just doesn't want to "share" you, you're his and his alone!

But when he looks up at you, and see just how nervous you are, waiting patiently for any kind of reaction from him.

He realizes he's thinking of you as an object and not a person and mentally kicks himself in the face for it.

Lucifer reaches for your hand and offers you a small smile.

After a long conversation where you two express your own desires and worries, you two agree and decide to give it a try.

At first... I'm not gonna lie...it would be quite... difficult...

The man is possessive and struggles to see you giving any kind of affection to any of his brothers.

However I think he genuinely wants this to work, he wants to see you happy and knows that just because you also love his brothers doesn't mean you love him any less.

So he'll sit down and talk to you whenever he feels jealous, he knows communication is key and it honestly makes him feel a bit better.

With time Lucifer comes to accept it; He loves you and he loves his brothers and it makes him happy that they all can share such bond with you.

Mammon

I think he's the one who'll have a harder time adapting to a poly relationship.

I'll even go as far to say Lucifer's jealousy pales in comparison to Mammon's and I think this is due to his low self-esteem.

He won't accept it but he's jealous af when he sees you "getting cozy" with any of his brothers.

He'll even interrupt the moment by placing himself in the middle of whoever you were getting close to or think about some lame excuse to take you away.

This makes things more difficult and tense for everyone, so if Mammon continues his shenanigans expect a LOT more arguing from the brothers...(yes...more than normal...)

You'll have to sit him down and talk to him about his insecurities.

The first times he won't be very open with you, I think he might even get a bit angry if you even imply he's jealous and act all offended and walk out of the room.

Surprisingly the one who makes him understand how toxic he's being and how much this affects you is Asmo!

He'll have a serious talk with him, and just the fact of seeing his often bubbly and cheerful young bro being all serious is enough for Mammon to realize that what he's been doing and how he's been acting hurts you and his brothers.

He'll apologize...the Mammon way...

But ultimately he now makes an effort to respect whenever you're close to one of his brothers.

Just like Lucifer. Mammon will come to accept you love him and his brothers all the same.

He'll sometimes even suggest places you all can go together for a date.

Please, be patient with the avatar of greed with time he will come to accept that love exist in more than one way or form.

Leviathan

Surprisingly, unlike his older brothers, your favorite shut-in-otaku has an easier time adapting to a poly relationship.

Easier, however does not mean problems are inexistent...

He has a low self-esteem and sometimes might get the feeling that you're ""picking favorites""

However he won't tell you anything about it, and he'll just try to pretend like nothing is wrong.

Fortunately for you, Levi is quite easy to read so you immediately notice whenever he's feeling sad.

But all you have to do is have a little gaming session with him, and as the two of you "game" the night away he'll eventually open up to you about whatever is bothering him.

All it takes is a little reassurance and saying "I love you" to the avatar of envy from time to time and he'll be all good with you showing affection to the rest of his brothers.

Satan

Uhhhh...this is a tricky one...

You see...Satan is probably the second brother you came out to and perhaps you didn't even realized that you did because it just happened so natural.

The two of you were talking and it just slipped out of your mouth and he was like "hahaha, right?" And continued the conversation as normal.

He genuinely doesn't care, (don't get me wrong I don't mean that in a bad way) but all he knows is that he loves you and he wants you to be happy, and if expanding the love that the two of you have to his brothers makes you happy, then so be it!

However... remember I said this was tricky?

Satan has no issue with you being affectionate with his brothers...all of them except for Lucifer...

When he sees you getting close to Lucifer he won't say anything, he won't make a scene or a passive-agressive remark, he'll just excuse himself and exit the room. (Neither he will confront you about it later when the two of you are alone)He won't say anything at all; he'll just stay silent and pretend like nothing is wrong.

However you'll be able to notice Satan's true feelings whenever Lucifer has a small present or gesture with you.

Oh? Lucifer gifted you a $300,000 coat? Well, Satan will give you another coat but this one is $600,000.

Lucifer treated you to dinner at ristorante six? Well, darling... guess what? Satan will reserve the entire building just for you!

At some point he will notice how bad this makes you feel, since he's turning a relationship into a competition and that's no good...

He'll eventually take a step back and realize how childish he's being, how his behavior hurts your feelings and might have even made you feel guilty or responsible for his beef with his older brother.

Before you even decide to talk to him about it, he already knows what you're trying to say, so he'll be the one to sit you down and apologize for his wrongdoings.

You're someone who he values dearly and all that he wants is for you to be happy, so he'll be willing to make the effort to get along or at least be a little more tolerant of Lucifer.

There might be times where they still fight and stop talking to each other for long periods of time, but the two of them will take the time to let you know that this has nothing to do with you and that there's no reason for you tu feel guilty.

Because if there's something in wich both, the avatar of pride and wrath agree in... Is in how much they love you.

Asmodeus

Asmodeus (definitely) was the first one to know about you being polyamorous.

He probably knew before you even said anything, let's be honest here...

He's probably the one who you're more comfortable talking about it.

The brothers accept you, yes...but Asmo understands you!

He knows that the world can be quite cruel to people who love differently to what our society stablish as "normal".

Whenever he expressed his liking for more than one person he was shamed or labeled as someone promiscuous who'll never be deserving of "true" love.

It happened in the celestial realm, in the human realm, and even sometimes here in the devildom.

Angels where expected to only focus in the lord and nothing else, some humans are close minded and shame whoever is different from them, and demon's often confuse love with obsession and get easily tangled up in possessive behavior, often viewing their partners as objects rather than individuals with their own goals and desires. (his brothers are the perfect example of that)

So he just knows how difficult it might have been for you to find acceptance.

So he gives it to you; acceptance, reassurance, however many times you need to.

He'll be the one to encourage you to talk with his brothers, he'll be there to support you if you ever feel nervous, and he'll be the one to call his brothers out on their bs whenever they start to show any signs of toxic behavior.

He knows in all relationships communication and trust in your partners is key to a successful relationship, so he reminds this to everyone and even goes as far as to make plans where everyone feels included.

Overall the avatar of lust is the voice of reason in this relationship, because he knows better than anyone else that love is something that can't and should never be limited by what others believe or expect "true love" should look like.

Beelzebub

You weren't sure how Beel would react once you told him.

But still you were pleasantly surprised by Beel's reaction!

He was so accepting from the beginning and even thanked you for trusting him enough to share this with him.

He's happy that you want him to form part of this relationship.

He knows his brothers love you as much as he does and that you love them back, so he sees this as the perfect option for everyone.

He even thinks this relationship has brought everyone closer together.

Over all the avatar of gluttony is more than happy to be with you and share your affection with people he holds equally as dearly.

Belphegor

Belphie, much like Lucifer struggles to understand why would you want such a thing?

Is his love not enough for you?

It takes little more time for him to understand you, and learn that love doesn't just limits to one person.

He can be a bit insensitive some times, so he might accidentally say something hurtful to you about it.

And that's when Asmo has to intervene...

He'll have a talk with his younger brother and make him realize that there's more than one form of love and how his words might have hurt you.

He'll apologize...(much like Mammon) in his own way...

After thinking about it for a while, he realizes he's happy whenever you show affection to Beel, and wonders if it would be the same with the rest of his brothers.

Slowly but surely, Belphie it's more open to this new relationship.

There'll be times where he might try to monopolize your love, but he'll stop once you, Beel or Asmo call him out on it.

His favorite thing of this new relationship is whenever you spend time with him and Beel.

Please be patient with the avatar of sloth.

▪️▫️▪️▫️▪️▫️

If you find any grammatical errors let me know! I'm trying to improve my english and that would help me so so much!

I will forever thank you if you go check out my other profile: @aileysmirnov where I post things about my OC: edits, one-shots, imagines, art, etc. If you like Greek mythology and the bat family maybe you would get to be as fond of her as much as I am!

Anyway, thank you for reading!

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celiabowens · 4 years

Text

underrated SFF books (YA and Adult)

So uhm, since I keep seeing the same books on my dash all the time (and I like them too, just...there’s more! to read!) here’s a list of less popular SFF books, divided into YA and Adult. I’ve tried to mention when there is lgbt rep and the trigger warnings. Also, books written by poc will be in bold. Please point out any typo or mistake or if I’ve forgotten specific rep/tw mentions.

All of these are books that I’ve read and enjoyed (by enjoyed I mean anything from 3 stars and above), but if anyone wants to add titles please feel free to do so!!

YA:

The Star-Touched Queen by Roshani Chokshi: beautifully written, fairytale-like story rich in mythology (inspired by several Hindu myths. There’s a full list on goodreads indicated by the author herself). Roshani’s prose is gorgeous.

A Crown of Wishes by Roshani Chokshi: it’s a companion novel to The Star-Touched Queen, but both can be read as a standalone. I liked this one more than its companion and I particularly loved how the romance was written (slow burn, but specifically, the author really highlights the mutual respect between the characters, we love to see it).

The Young Elites by Marie Lu: fantasy trilogy set in a world inspired by Renaissance Italy, in which children who survived a mysterious and deadly illness ended up with strange and dangerous powers. Secret societies and a female villain!

The Kingdom of Back by Marie Lu: historical fantasy following Mozart’s sister, Nannerl, a girl as talented as her brother, but afraid of being forgotten because of the lack of opportunities she has to be seen and heard. Nuanced sibling relationship, no romance.

The Midnight Lie by Marie Rutkoski: fantasy f/f romance! Both a coming of age story set in a society with a rigid class system and a slow burn f/f romance with a lot of banter. TW: abuse.

The Weight of Feathers by Anna-Marie McLemore: magical realism. The book follows two families of traveling performers that have been locked in a feud for over a generation. This was the author’s debut and I remember getting an arc of it and being impressed by both the prose and how the forbidden love trope was handled.

When the Moon was Ours by Anna-Marie McLemore: another magical realism novel. One of the main characters is a trans boy and the book focuses on issues of racism and gender. One of my favorite YA!

Strange Grace by Tessa Gratton: fantasy romance set in a village that periodically sacrifices a young man in order to keep a deal with the devil that ensures their prosperity. Also, polyamorous and non-binary rep.

The Rise of Kyoshi by F.C. Yee: first book in a duology following avatar Kyoshi’s life. It explores the political and cultural aspect of the Earth Kingdom and Kyoshi’s past. Bisexual rep.

Descendant of the Crane by Joan He: sort of a murder mystery fantasy, as the main character finds herself suddenly thrust into power once her father has been murdered. The story has a slow build up to a last part full of twists and machinations and it features lots of court intrigue. Warning: the ending is quite open and afaik there isn’t a sequel planned as of now.

The Bone Houses by Emily Lloyd-Jones: a quite unique take on zombies influenced by Welsh mythology (it’s super cool). The novel follows Ryn and their siblings, as they try to get by after their parents’ death by working as gravediggers. Only well, the dead don’t always stay dead. The characters read a bit younger than they are imo. There is chronic pain rep.

The Magnolia Sword by Sherry Thomas: retelling of the original ballad of Mulan. The book follows Mulan, who’s trained her whole life to win a duel for a priceless heirloom, as she joins the army. There’s a lot of political and historical details, which I really appreciated. Do not go into it expecting a fun adventure though. The descriptions of war aren’t extremely graphic, but be aware of the fact that most of the book is set during a conflict.

The Candle and The Flame by Nafiza Azad: standalone fantasy set in a city on the Silk Road! It’s a quite slow-paced tale about love, family and politics. It has lush descriptions of landscapes and cultures (and FOOD, there are some really great descriptions of food). It’s a very atmospheric book and while I struggled a bit with the pace I’d still recommend it.

Forest of a Thousand Lanters by Julie C. Dao: sort of an East Asian inspired retelling of Snow White, but following the Evil Queen before she became Snow White’s stepmother. I honestly haven’t read its sequel (which should focus on Snow White herself), but I do think this can be read and enjoyed as a standalone too.

The Queen’s Thief series by Megan Whalen Turner: it’s hard to point out exactly what this series is about because it has evolved so much with time. It starts out as classic quest/adventure series with The Thief (which may seem a classic and simple book, but is actually full of foreshadowing and has a really clever set up), but develops into a complex and intriguing political fantasy in The Queen of Attolia and The King of Attolia (and then goes back to the quest theme in book 5, Thick as Thieves).

Adult:

A Fist of Permutations in Lightning and Wildflowers by Alyssa Wong: I’m cheating with this one because it’s technically a short story but I love Alyssa Wong’s stories so I’m putting it here anyway. It can be read for free and you should just...read it.

The Poppy War by R.F. Kuang: grimdark fantasy (TW: abuse, self harm, rape, drug abuse), inspired by Chinese history. It’s adult, but follows younger MCs and the unique blend of different historical periods/inspirations makes it extremely interesting. The characters are extremely fucked up in the best possible way, plus the use of shamanism is awesome. Please make sure you check all the TW before reading.

The Sword of Kaigen by M.L. Wang: a Japanese-inspired militaristic fantasy, with elemental magic, a badass housewife dealing with her past and hiding a sword in her kitchen’s floor. It has interesting and nuanced family dynamics and a great reflection on propaganda and the use of narratives.

Empire of Sand by Tasha Suri: first book in an epic fantasy duology inspired by Mughal India (TW: abuse, slavery). I really liked both Empire of Sand and its companion and I find them pretty underrated. Both books have great slow burn romance (with a focus on mutual trust and respect) and focus on culture, religion, self acceptance and politics.

Gods of Jade and Shadow by Silvia Moreno-Garcia: a fantasy bildungsroman set in Mexico during the Jazz age. It’s a great approach to adult SFF as it follows a young girl on a life changing adventure. It features Mayan mythology and a god slowly becoming human (this trope is everything!).

The Bear and the Nightingale by Katherine Arden: a coming of age story inspired by Russian folklore. The trilogy as a whole has one of the best arcs I’ve ever seen: each book is perfectly self-contained and has its own arc, but also fits perfectly in the bigger picture of the trilogy. The atmosphere is amazing, the cast of characters is extremely well developed. Also frost demons are better than men.

The Binding by Bridget Collins: historical fantasy, but with very minimal fantasy elements. It’s set in a world vaguely reminiscent of 19th century England. I’d say this book is about humans and self discovery. It’s about cowardice and the lies we tell ourselves and those we wish we could tell ourselves. Gay rep. (TW: abuse, sexual assault, pretty graphic suicide scene).

The Divine Cities trilogy by Robert Jackson Bennett: starting with City of Stairs, it follows a female diplomat and spymaster(!!). The whole trilogy features an interesting discussion about godhood, religion, fanatism, politics, without ever being boring or preachy. It has complex and rich world building and a pretty compelling mystery.

Foundryside by Robert Jackson Bennett: heist fantasy following a thief as she’s hired to steal a powerful artifact that may change magical technology as she knows it. Set in a Venice-like merchant city. Also, slow burn f/f romance.

Jade City by Fonda Lee: sort of a gangster urban fantasy, heavily inspired by wuxia and set in an Asian-inspired metropolis. It follows a pretty big cast of characters, each with their own journey and development. It features nuanced family dynamics and a lot of political and economical subplots. Not extremely prominent, but book 2 features m/m side rep.

Trail of Lightning by Rebecca Roanhorse: inspired by Native American culture and specifically by the idea of subsequent worlds. It has a kickass MC and a good mix of original elements and typical UF tropes. TW: the book isn’t extremely violent but there is death and some gore.

A Memory Called Empire by Arkady Martine: space opera inspired by the Mexica and middle period Byzantium. It focuses on topics like colonialism and the power of narratives and language. It has one of the best descriptions of what it’s like to live in between spaces I’ve ever read. Also very interesting political intrigue and has a slow burn f/f romance (and a poly relationship recalled through flashbacks). I ranted a lot about it already.

Ninefox Gambit by Yoon Ha Lee: a Korean-inspired space opera with a magic system based on math. It’s honestly quite convoluted and difficult to follow, but it also features some of the best political intrigue I’ve ever read. Plenty of lying, backstabbing and mind games. It also features lesbian and bisexual rep and an aroace side character (TW: mass shooting, sexual assault, abuse). I also really recommend Yoon Ha Lee’s short-story collection Conservation of Shadows.

The long way to a small angry planet by Becky Chambers: character driven space opera featuring a found family journeying through space. A fun read, that also deals with topics such as sexuality and race. Quite easy to go through, as the world building and plot aren’t particularly complex themselves. f/f romance.

The Empress of Salt and Fortune by Nghi Vo: an Asian-inspired fantasy novella that gives a voice to people usually silenced by history. It follows a cleric (non binary rep) as they chronicle the story of the late empress, retold through objects that she used in her life. It focuses on bonds between women and the power that lies in being unnoticed. f/f side rep.

The Black God’s Drums by P. Djèlí Clark: an urban fantasy novella, based on Orisha mythology and set in an alternate, sort of steampunk, New Orleans. I really like how creative Clark’s worlds are and how good he is at writing female characters (which rarely happens with male authors).

The haunting of tram car 015 by P. Djèlí Clark: novella set in an alternate steampunk Cairo populated by supernatural entities. It’s set in the same world of a Dead Djinn in Cairo, which is a short story you can read for free.

This is How You Lose the Time War by Amal El-Mohtar and Max Gladstone: epistolary novella set during a time-travel war. It has gorgeous writing and an amazing f/f romance. As a novella, it’s quite short but it’s beautifully crafted and so complex for such a short book!

The Citadel of Weeping Pearls by Aliette de Bodard: a novella set in the Xuya universe (a series of novellas/short stories set in a timeline where Asia became dominant, and where the space age has empires of Vietnamese and Chinese inspiration), but can be read as a standalone. It’s a space opera featuring a disappeared citadel and the complex relationship between the empress and her daughter as war threatens her empire.

One for My Enemy by Olivie Blake: self-published urban fantasy following two rival families in New York. Sort of a Romeo and Juliette retelling but with gangster families and magic. Honestly recommend all of her books, I love how Olivie writes and especially how she writes female characters.

#book recs #book recommendations #adult sff #ya literature #lgbt fiction #litblr #listen this doesn't show in tags i'm DONE #done with this tagging system lol #also if there are mistakes please tell me!!#book rec

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narrators-journal · 3 years

Text

Help from the help

Narrator, do you have a thing for these sorts of power dynamics mayhaps? Do you maybe want to get railed by Illumi while you’re his maid? Yes. Yes I do.

cw: I dunno, maids? Illumi being awkward maybe?

In total, you'd seen Illumi Zoldyck maybe five times during your time as a temporary maid for his family. Three times when you'd cleared dinner dishes, once when it had been your turn to clean his wing, so you'd been making his bed and he'd come in and ordered you to not forget to clean his bathroom too, and once when you had been putting a load of laundry into the washer and turned around to find the tall, dark-eyed assassin so close you actually ran into him a bit, he'd apparently come in to try and find out if a piece of clothing had been washed. Aside from those times, you'd hardly seen him. Despite these sparse encounters, you were rather smitten with him almost from the first time. It wasn't like he was insanely better looking than any other Zoldyck, Kikyo was very pretty, Silva was nowhere near the worst to look at, even Milluki had his charms and wasn't hard on the eyes, but something about the doll-like assassin drew you in more than the rest. Probably the unattainable aspect you mused to yourself one day as you made your way upstairs with a laundry basket full of cleaning supplies, heading to clean said son's wing of the home today. Or maybe I just have a thing for men with long hair, you continued as you went, finding the upstairs cleaning closet and fetching the vacuum as you lost yourself in your thoughts. You were spacing out pretty hard, just mulling over all of what you found attractive about Illumi, entertaining yourself with ranking which Zoldyck you'd date before the rest, stuff like that while you worked, so you didn't notice until you'd turned the corner at the end of the hall leading into Illumi's wing that you had that static-y, fuzzy feeling his aura left you with creeping up your spine. Confused, you looked around, giving a small yelp when you realized Illumi was damn near leaning over you from behind, "Uh, s-sir??" you squeaked with wide (e/c) eyes before quickly clearing your throat and speaking again in a more composed voice "is there something I can help you with...master Illumi?" He simply stared at you, straightening at least when he had gotten your attention, "I was wanting to ask something." He finally explained, walking around you to be in front, which helped you relax a tad bit, as at least now you weren't relying on somewhat intimate senses to gauge where he was, "Well sir, if this is about some cleaning issue, I wasn't the one to clean your wing yesterday, that was a different maid," you chirped, using your happy demeanor to hopefully hide the filthy places your brain had shot to after his words. "I know, I ran into the maid yesterday. I'd rather ask this of a woman closer to my age." he said flatly, and if he noticed any giveaways for your lascivious thoughts he didn't acknowledge them as he went on, "you see, father has told me I lack experience with women, and if I'm to find a wife I need to learn. So, would you help me?" he asked, making you blink, your brain temporarily screeching to a halt. "Uh, I don't see how I could help with that, master Illumi." you pointed out, laughing awkwardly while he looked at you coldly, and you knew you might've offended him, "(Y/n), I know very well that you are attracted to me, you more than any other maid should realize I have no trouble attracting women." and just like that, the color drained from your face. Your heart felt like someone was trying to squeeze the blood from it while you scrambled to reassure him, the task not made easier under his calculating, unreadable gaze. Finally, after a moment of floundering, you gave up and just went quiet, resigning yourself to the embarrassment of so brutally having your crush called out, "A-alright, so...what did you need help with?" you asked, your voice somewhat quiet, which seemed to amuse or please the long haired billionaire in front of you, "I need practice with seducing a woman, and if I am to try, I'd prefer to seduce someone I find attractive. So, I chose you." The words made your breath catch in your throat, but before you could put together the words to ask your next question, or even the power of thought required to register that last part, he spoke again, "No, I am not a virgin, I just don't have a plethora of experience, and my father says that I need more if I'm to get a wife." he explained, and you decided not to push it further or ask about why his father was concerned with the issue, "Alright, so what do you want me to do to help?" you asked instead, "I would like for you to let me try to seduce you. You have my permission to tell me if my attempts are off in any way," You nodded, agreeing to help the struggling assassin. After that was settled, he left you alone to continue cleaning. What followed was possibly the most awkward period in your life. True to his word, Illumi did try his best to try and seduce you over the next two weeks, and true to his word, he did need work at it. Part of you was somewhat charmed at how awkward this intimidating murderer was when it came to trying to flirt, but the rest of you lowkey wanted to be one of his hits rather than hit on for that same reason.

At first, his lines were rather cheesy, stuff that you guessed he heard his parents use or from movies, but as time went it became pretty obvious that the lines weren't exactly the issue, his delivery was. "y'know, this might work better if you were more...expressive," you advised one day after he'd tried another miss of a pick-up line, and all you really got in response was a slow, owlish blink, "Expressive? I'm expressive," he argued, but you shook your head, "You have a tendency to sound bored or uninterested when you speak, and it's currently what's making you sound so awkward...sir." you explained, and for a moment he looked a tad lost, but than hummed, "What should I sound like then?" he finally asked, "Hisoka?" Your stomach dropped at the thought of Illumi trying to imitate Hisoka's way of flirting. You'd run into the brightly colored magician a few times, mostly whenever he'd stop by to be tortured for interfering with jobs, and you'd been hit on each time by the man. You didn't know if you could survive Illumi being as brash, forward, and creepy as that. "I wouldn't suggest following his lead, but m-maybe finding a middle ground? L-like, sound more...coy? Flirtatious? But don't sound quite as...aroused, as master Hisoka does." you advised, and Illumi seemed to understand better. "so, what if I did this," he than walked towards you, backing you to the wall of room you'd been cleaning in his wing and than caging you between his arms before leaning down so your faces were closer together before he spoke in a much more playful, husky voice, "Would you let me bed you now, (y/n)?" and you couldn't even respond. It was like he'd knocked the wind from your lungs in one try, leaving you feeling as if you were going to melt down the wall. Thankfully, Illumi inferred your answer from there and smirked a bit while his hands slid down and than around you, pulling you closer to him so you didn't have the option of sliding downwards anymore. "I didn't expect it to be so easy to win you over, (y/n). I've only changed one thing and you're already putty." he purred, and all you could muster up was a pretty brainless reply, "It's a pretty big...change." even in your derpy, hormone-addled state that sounded kinda dumb, but it got you a small laugh from Illumi. After that, the assassin took you by surprise and actually went in for a kiss, though he pulled away when you squeaked, "What?" "ah, n-nothing, just didn't expect you to...do that." you squeaked out, your body now fully aware of just how close his was, and of a small spot of pressure. "I did say I would try to seduce you, that includes getting you to have sex with me." he pointed out, and his return to a disinterested, aloof voice did nothing to stop his words from being gasoline on a bonfire to you. So, when you couldn't form any other arguments, he kissed you again, and this time you were swift to return it. You wouldn't admit it, but you were a little surprised at just how good of a kisser Illumi was. Yes, he'd said he wasn't a virgin, but after some asking around you'd learned that he at most has has sex 4 times, all for jobs, so you were not expecting his kiss to knock you on your proverbial ass like it did. Though, you were glad to be in one of his side rooms when it did, because the way he dominated your tongue with his, and slid his hand down your back, over your ass and down your thigh to pick up your knee may have gotten a pretty inappropriate noise out of you. So, when he finally broke the kiss to step away in order to strip, you were already panting while following his lead and losing your own clothing. Once fully disrobed, he wasted no time in scooping you up and pressing you back into the wall with another kiss, letting you wrap your arms around his neck and your legs around his hips for support. Then, he set to work on getting more moans out of you. He started with pressing his body to yours, and you rewarded him with a mewl and a hip wiggle when you felt his swiftly stiffening member against your stomach, you also gasped and moaned when his lips moved from yours and down your throat, zeroing in on your sweet spot within seconds and nipping and sucking at it until you were sure to bruise. After that, you were already soaked enough for him, but he kept going, keeping you up with one hand on your ass, using the other to rub your clit and send shockwaves of pleasure through you so powerful you curse and arched your back. "it's been a while since you've gotten off, hasn't it?" He asked, using that playful purr you'd later curse yourself for teaching him to use, but for now you just nodded. It really had been a long while since you'd had sex, if at all, but either way the way he played your body like an instrument had all other times currently beaten. That decision was set in stone when you felt him leave your clit for a moment to slip a finger inside of your already soaked cunt, giving a few testing thrusts just to make you moan again, then he pulled his hand away and instead grabbed onto your hips to lift you up more, which earned a squeal when your hips pressed more against his member on the way up. He quieted you down briefly with another kiss while your veins coursed with lightning and he lined himself up with your entrance. He pulled away just as he pushed into you, wanting to hear you whine his name as he filled you up. Once you were full, he began to move, briefly setting a slow pace, but once you were moaning more he was quick to get rougher. Pretty soon you were a mess of moans and curses, clawing into his shoulders a bit, which got you pretty mercilessly rammed into as punishment, but the pain only seemed to further feed your lust at this point, along with Illumi sprinkling in hungry kisses while he slammed his dick into you repeatedly. Though, he made sure to use one hand to hold your hips in place while the other was in your (h/l), (h/c) hair to keep you from moving up the wall or turning your head to avoid his demands for kisses. In a short time you could feel a knot in your stomach tighten, your orgasm quickly approaching. So, with one final cry of his name, you let yourself fall over the edge, Illumi soon following after. Though, part of you was a bit sad that he pulled out to spill his seed onto your stomach and not fill you up with the warm fluid, but you kept your complaints to a small whine, which earned you a look that you gauged as intrigued. "Did you want me to come inside?" he asked, and while his voice was back to being flat, and notedly not changed by the activity he just partook in or the fact that he was holding you up, you could hear the hint of maybe surprise in it. "A little..." you admitted with an embarrassed, breathy laugh before trying to unwrap your legs from around him so you could get dressed, but he moved his hand from your hair to your thigh, keeping it in place, "Well than, I'll have to fix my error."

#maid reader #illumi #illumi x reader #hxh #hunter x hunter #Illumi x maid!reader #not sfw

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plaidbooks · 3 years

Text

Dark Secrets: New Beginnings

A/N: This is the first installment of the Vampire!Sonny x reader fic. This chapter is only setting the stage; next chapter will be more about the vampire aspect, I promise! This covers the Bookstore square in @adarafaelbarba moodboard bingo!

Tags: mentions of sex

Words: 2233

Taglist: @witches-unruly-heart @beccabarba @thatesqcrush @itsjustmyfantasyroom @permanentlydizzy @ben-c-group-therapy @infiniteoddball @glowingmess @whimsicallymad @lv7867 @storiesofsvu @cycat4077 @alwaysachorusgirl @glimmerglittergirl @joanofarkansass @caracalwithchips @berniesilvas @reading--mermaid @averyhotchner @mrsrafaelbarba @detective-giggles @crowleysqueenofhell @dreamlover31

You spent hours on the computer compiling resources for your thesis. After years and years, you were finally getting your Ph. D in History…if you could just finish this damned thesis. List complete, you headed to the local bookstore; you always checked them first before going online, since they were cheaper.

You were intimately familiar with the bookstore; you went there often. And you had double and triple checked online that they had these books. You had a small basket, four books in it, while you looked for the fifth and final book you needed. But its spot on the shelf stood vacant; a perfect hole where it should be.

Shaking your head slightly, you started to search the shelves around it, in case someone didn’t put it back correctly. But you were coming up empty. And this was the book that you needed to buy here; the shop had it for $20, while online was a couple hundred.

“Looking for Making the Revolution: America, 1763-1791?” a voice asked from behind you.

You turned to find a pale, lanky, attractive man, his hair slicked back, his bright blue eyes watching you intently. He was sitting at a table, open book in his hand. Seeing the cover, you knew it was the book you needed.

“I am, yes. Were you intending to buy it?” you questioned, praying he said no.

The corner of his mouth twitched upwards. “I was debating it. Why, do you want it?”

“I do; I need it for my thesis. If you let me buy it, I promise to give it to you when I’m done, free of charge.” At this point, you were just desperate for that book.

His eyes seemed to bore into you as he thought about your proposal. Finally, he smiled, saying, “I think that’s a noble reason to buy this book. You’ve got yourself a deal.” He held the book out to you, and you gently took it from him.

“Thank you so, so much. You don’t know how much this helps me,” you said, placing the book in your basket.

He held a hand up. “No problem. There’s a lot of inaccuracies in that text, anyways.”

You blinked in surprise. “There are?”

“Oh yes. For one, it perpetuates the idea that Christopher Columbus came here to ‘escape tyranny’ in England, which is a load of crap, if I’m honest.”

You took a step closer to the strange man. “Do you have a source on that?”

He thought about it, chuckling to himself about something, before he answered. “Well, I am in the process of transcribing a manuscript from the man himself. But it hasn’t been published quite yet, so I doubt it’ll be of use to you for your thesis.”

“Wh—who are you?” you asked in awe.

He held a hand out for you to shake. “Dr. Dominick Carisi Jr., but you, my dear, may call me Sonny.”

Your eyes widened in shock, and you quickly shook his hand. “Dr. Carisi? Oh my god! I’ve been reading your work in class; I loved your thesis on slavery!” You had never seen a picture of him, had no idea he was so young; he was about your age. You had expected him to be an old man, at least in his 80s, not this attractive man in his early 40s at most.

He barked out a laugh. “You’ve really been reading my work? I’m flattered. I didn’t think anyone put stock in my texts.” While it was true he was a world renowned historian, his work was seen as highly controversial. He had a knack for citing manuscripts and journal entries, things that no one had discovered before he brought them to the limelight. But every authenticator had proven that the writings were from the time period. And that was enough for you.

“Please, sir, er, Doctor. Could I spend a day with you, pick your brain for my thesis? I’ll—I’ll buy the drinks and food, just…please?” you asked, suddenly embarrassed.

But Sonny’s smile grew. “I’d like that. But only if you call me Sonny. If you’re doing your thesis, then I assume you’re almost done with your doctorate?” You nodded, and he continued, “then in my eyes, we’re equals, and you don’t need to call me ‘Doctor’.”

Your heart beat a little faster when he called you equals. “Thank you so much Doc—Sonny. Does the coffeeshop next door work for you?”

“It does. And I’m free all week, whenever you need me.”

“How about tomorrow morning? I don’t have class until 3pm; I hope that’s enough time to chat.”

He gave you that heart melting smile once more. “Sounds good. See you tomorrow.” Then he took your hand and kissed it. As he walked away, your knees felt weak. You were infatuated within five minutes of talking to him.

**********************

Sonny turned out to be an incredible source of information. Plus, he brought books that he thought would help you, letting you borrow what you needed. And, like yesterday, you found yourself completely enamored with him. He didn’t have a ring on, so you assumed him unmarried, but you didn’t know how to bring it up without being weird. Sure, you were close in age, but he was done with school, became a published historian, while you were still finishing up college. But he never talked down to you; on the contrary, he seemed highly interested in what you had to say.

Like before, you had been nervous—star-struck, really—when you met up with him. But as the hours ticked by, you found yourself more and more comfortable with him. He was highly intelligent, especially about history. You had found it hard to find someone who was as interested in history as you were, without sounding like a pretentious asshole. But Sonny checked all those boxes for you. You were just unsure if he felt the same.

“When is your thesis due? I feel like it’s still early in the academic year,” he asked.

You cleared your throat. “It is; I still have months and months to work on it. It’s due next year, but I want it to be perfect, you know?”

“I do, I do,” he agreed, nodding. “I hope you’re taking some time off, though, as well. Don’t let this paper take up your whole life; you should be out, appreciating everything this life has to give you. Don’t get stuck in the past.”

You looked at the table, letting his words soak in. It was like he had looked right through you; for the past month or so, you’ve been deep in your studies. You had friends, sure, but you hardly saw them. And you’d given up on dating until after you finished college, anyways. But maybe Sonny was on to something. You should seize the day, capture every moment in memories.

“Would you like to get dinner with me, Sonny?” you asked, trying to sound as confident as possible.

It was his turn to look surprised. “Oh, uh…sorry, you caught me off guard. In all my years, no one has ever asked me out; it’s usually the other way around.”

You chuckled. “You’re not much older than me,” you joked, and he smiled. “Maybe it’s time for something new. For both of us…that is, if you want?”

“I’d love to go to dinner with you,” he said, and your heart soared.

When it was getting close to 3, you bade him goodbye, and he told you he would be eagerly awaiting your dinner date. You felt your face heat at the words, and you swore your face never cooled off for the rest of the day.

*********************

That date with Doctor Carisi turned out to be the best decision of your life. You both felt the spark between you, and you said yes to a second date before he even finished asking. Now, it’s been ten months of loving bliss between you. You completed your thesis, got your doctorate, and Sonny couldn’t be more proud of you. And you learned that while he was a historian, he was also a detective. He said he wanted to help people now, by giving them both access to history material, and by putting absolute monsters away.

But there were little things with him, quirks, really. Though you’ve been to his place, and he yours, he never made a move to get you into bed. Sure, you’ve kissed—and sometimes this escalated to a full-blown make out session—but he didn’t seem interested in sex.

He also didn’t seem interested in moving in together…or a future at all, really. Whenever you tried to bring it up, he would just nod along with you, agreeing to whatever you said and adding on a lot of “one day’s”.

He had no family for you to meet, and yours didn’t live close. You noticed he also didn’t eat or drink much; he loved to make you dinner, and he would say that he snacked while cooking. And then, about once a month, he’d leave for 3-4 days, claiming he wanted to be alone to work on the manuscript.

You gave him as much space as he asked for, and though you still loved him dearly, you were starting to wonder if there was something wrong with you…or if it was just something he was having issues with.

“Hey Sonny?” you asked one day while snuggling on the couch at your place. “Are we okay?”

He glanced down at you. “As far as I know, yes? Why, something on your mind?”

“Well…I was just thinking about how we’ve been together almost a year and we still haven’t moved in together,” you tried.

He looked to the ceiling as he thought. “Wow, I guess it really has been that long now, hasn’t it? I feel like I just met you yesterday.”

“So, are we not connecting on a deeper level, then?” You sat up, turning to look at him.

His bright blue eyes found yours, and his expression softened. “That’s not what I meant; I’m sorry it came out like that. Time just…it moves so quickly is all. Look, I love you, I just—I don’t think I’m quite ready to make that jump yet. I’m sorry; I know this must be frustrating, but I promise you one day, I’ll…I’ll be ready.”

You nodded. “I love you too, I just….”

“What is it? You can tell me—”

“Why won’t you sleep with me?” you asked softly. His eyes widened, and you quickly added, “are—are you ace? It’s fine if you are, I understand, but I just…I feel like it’s something wrong with me, and I—”

He cupped your face in his hands, looking deeply in your eyes. “No, it’s nothing wrong with you, I promise. I’m just…I’m not ready—”

“I have urges, Sonny. And I love you, want to wait for you. But it’s been almost a year. I—I don’t believe a healthy relationship is built on sex, but well, it’d be nice to have every once in a while….”

He sighed, releasing your face. “It’s not that I don’t want to, because I do. I just want to be absolutely sure I’m ready. Call it shyness, or embarrassment, whatever you want. But I want to make sure that—that you’re the one for me, first, okay?”

You opened your mouth to respond when his phone rang. He gave you an apologetic look before answering with his stiff, “Carisi.” He mostly listened, making little noises of affirmation, before hanging up.

“I’m so, so sorry, doll. But the department needs me. I swear we’ll talk about this once I’m home, okay?” he promised, getting to his feet.

He grabbed his jacket, heading for the front door. “Sonny wait,” you called, and he stopped, looking back at you. You hurried over to him, looking up into those beautiful blues. “Be careful.”

He smiled softly. “I will be; promise.” He gave you a kiss, and then he was gone.

********************

You didn’t hear from Sonny again until the next morning, when he showed up on your front door, breakfast in hand. He apologized for leaving you last night during that important talk, but you brushed it off, telling him it was fine.

“That’s not all I have to apologize for,” he said, looking anywhere but at you. “I’m…going undercover. I’ll be gone for three months.”

Your face fell, and you put your fingers under his chin, tilting his face until he looked at you. “Three months?” you breathed.

“I’m sorry; I tried to decline, but the Lieutenant gave her orders. I leave in an hour.”

“Three months…” you said again, worry blossoming in your chest. This was the longest he’d be gone since you started dating.

He nodded. “I’ll text or call when I can, but don’t expect it; it may be too dangerous.”

You’d heard enough; you lifted onto your tiptoes, kissing him desperately. Your hands went to his hair, and you pulled him close, all your fear and trepidation in the kiss. He froze for only a moment before he was kissing you back, hands on your hips. He clutched you tightly enough that you gasped in pain, and he pulled away, releasing you.

“I’m sorry. I love you,” he muttered before turning to leave, but you had a suspicion that he wasn’t apologizing for leaving.

#sonny carisi x reader #fanfic #my writing #dark secrets #monster!au #adarafaelbarbaseptemberbingo

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morimallow · 3 years

Note

Kurōo with a male reader but reader actually animated and draws really well, can do realism easily literally any art style. And has worked fir anime studios & even made their own anime animation b4?

And he finds it out because he and Kenmawere snooping around?

WAIT, THIS IS SO CUTE. LET ME.. CHERISH THIS. I will entitle this..

Strokes

〖 This is fluff and crack (but I'm not funny?) despite the title, believe me. 〗

You were at your university studying a course totally unrelated to arts, same old poorly made up excuses for you not to go and enroll for Fine Arts running through your mind on a daily basis.

If you think about it, it's fine. Your parents decided to let you go and do artsy stuff after you graduated from whatever that course is.

But then again, this is you and you know you'll get rusty if you won't draw and just focus your mind on lengthy equations and pain-in-the-ass Language lessons and field practices you're sure you won't even use it in real life. Not with your chosen real career choice.

So, you decided to give it a go. You will be immediately offered a job if people can already see your potential.

You'd draw in your free time and also in not your free time and send those samples to animation studios. You use digital and paper and pen alternately... just because.

You would say you're popular. You have an art account, not using your real name because who the hell knows what your parents might do?

You would post there your WIPs, some original characters you made, an character you saw in a manga you read a long time ago that you forgot the title, your commissions with a large DO NOT REPOST or SAMPLE in the background, rough sketches of your boyfriend who doesn't know he was drawn, not that he would mind if he did know.

But the thing is, he really doesn't know. Nope, not a clue. None.

Not until you asked him to use your laptop, which was full of your drafts and placed helplessly on your study table, to send an email to your professor.

You have 4 accounts all in all: a personal one, your art account which you use for digital art stuff and to communicate with other artists, your account for the university and a formal one for.. formal stuff, I presume.

The things is, the account that was currently logged in was your art account and the animation studio you work at sent you your schedule the moment he opened your laptop.

Which means he accidentally opened it.

Kenma was sitting on your swivel chair, doing something on his phone. He was Kuroo's ride because they had somewhere to go after your boyfriend's done with what you made him do.

Kuroo briefly scanned the content of the mail before switching accounts so he could send the file you wanted to pass to your prof.

After telling you it's already sent.. he went back to your art account and whispered to Kenma who was too bored he joined Kuroo in his shenanigans.

Were they thinking you're living a double life? Yes. Did they scan your files? Yes. Did Kenma accidentally stumble upon an open box filled with tons of sketch books and old tablets you used for digital art? Yes. Did they start their search for whatever they're searching there? Absolutely.

For Kenma, he grabbed the sketch book with a label with the same name as the game he's addicted to at the moment. They were drafts then the final designs for the characters.

Kuroo didn't really feel angry or irritated you didn't tell him this. He knows you'd answer him honestly if he just asked but he can't.. stop.. looking at your works.

He was mesmerized. He has a lover so good in arts? HELL, YEAH. He's now convincing Kenma to join him to commission you because you deserve it.

You knew Kuroo would know about your work the moment you entered your dorm with their shoes still by the door. You leaned on the door frame, looking at them still smiling fondly at your works and you were thinking how to approach the situation because.. you weren't really angry? Your works have been out in the public for so many times. Why would you have an issue with Kuroo and Kenma looking at the original ones?

“What do you think?” you asked.

“You didn't tell me you were this amazing! I didn't even know you draw,” Kuroo said pouting but still feeling proud and happy if that's possible.

“I thought you already knew when I asked if I could practice on you?”

“What? When— I THOUGHT YOU WANTED TO BE BETTER AT KISSING SO I SAID YES.”

“I was on my phone.. drawing you..”

“You weren't scrolling through videos on how to kiss?”

“What made you think I was scrolling through kissing shit when I was holding my phone at a weird angle because that was the first time I used my phone for digital art?”

“Well, did it turn out good?”

“Absolutely, I caught your ugliness and enhanced it to make you uglier.”

Bickering, teasing, and Kenma not minding you two.

Kuroo then asked what your plans were after college and told you about the schedule he accidentally saw earlier. He knew then about your work, about when you made your own anime that was one of Kuroo and Kenma's top 10 faves. It was a short one but definitely caught their hearts.

Kenma had been planning to develop his own game and wanted you to design the characters, get your own crew to develop the graphics and all that artsy stuff (because I don't know anything).

“Kenma, you're my best friend but you can't just steal my boyfriend from me!”

“Kuroo, stealing and hiring are two different and obviously unrelated things.”

After a few more hours of planning and telling stories, Kenma decided to go home and Kuroo stayed for a sleepover.

He asked you where the hoodie he lent you a few weeks ago was because he didn't bring any change of clothes and you said it was in the top drawer.

Just as he was about to close it, his eyes caught a glimpse of a picture.

No, it wasn't a picture. It was a digital portrait of someone..? Maybe a late relative or your close cousin? The person (?) in the frame had some of your features. It was too realistic it didn't cross his mind that it was one of your works.

“Hey, babe? Who's this?”

The moment you realized what he was holding, you stopped breathing. He wasn't supposed to find that but then again, maybe you shouldn't have hid it in one of your drawers.

You mumbled your answer.

“What? Come again?”

“W-What our c-child would look like,” you looked away, blushing.

I realized the title had nothing to do with the content. Maybe this is why I never win in essay writing contests. LMAO. 💀

#kuroo x reader #haikyuu x reader #male reader insert #kuroo x male reader #haikyuu x male reader #haikyuu x you #kuroo tetsuro #kuroo x y/n #could also be #gn reader #kuroo x gn reader

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theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin · 3 years

Note

Thoughts on the ship Rosalie/Bella?

While it’s a nice thought, sadly, I don’t think either Rosalie or Bella are what the other would ever seek in a partner.

Indeed, I think the other would be too close of a reminder to what they see in the worst of themselves. So, even in better circumstances, I don’t think they’d choose each other.

Let’s break that down.

What is Rosalie Looking For?

Rosalie’s past is one filled with brutal trauma, betrayal, and heartbreak. She has been violated by men in the worst of ways, betrayed by the man she thought would be her husband, and then has the surreal experience of being turned into something that, while alive, is not human.

She romanticizes the human life she could have had, clinging to it, never acknowledging that circumstances were such that she never would have had it.

Rosalie never was going to get that simple future of being a humble, good, simple man’s wife with beautiful children and a comfortable life. She was raised in society, uncommonly beautiful and charming, and was set to marry the wealthiest man she could. It might not have been Royce, she could have married a good man, but she would have married into this wealthy world and not ended up with someone like Emmett.

I think this is very telling.

For very understandable reasons, Rosalie has never confronted nor truly gotten over her trauma. Oh, she murdered her rapists and murderers, and put their deaths behind her, she married Emmett and has a (fairly) good relationship with him, but she hasn’t taken her full final steps to recovery.

I think this in part shows in her ending up with a guy like Emmett.

Emmett’s not bad, don’t get me wrong, but it’s very telling in what he loves of Rosalie and that Rosalie loves him for it.

He worships her beauty above all other things and is described as a very simple but pleasant and laidback guy. I think Rosalie is at the point where she wants to be worshipped, especially for the quality that was most valued in her human life, her beauty.

She wants to be with someone safe, someone who loves her, and that someone is definitely Emmett.

I think in the short run this works out very well for the pair of them and perhaps even in the long run. I think both could have chosen a better partner.

Rosalie is complicated, she’s not the shallow vain bitch Edward complains she is nor is she what Emmett seems to see her as. Emmett doesn’t really get his wife, or defend her all that much, he’s in love with her beautiful cheerleader persona. Rosalie, similarly, is in love with this man whose greatest attribute is his love of her. I’m sure there are moments she finds Emmett rather boorish and slow on the uptake.

What Do I Think Rosalie Needs?

To be honest, of all the characters where I raise my eyebrow at Meyer putting them with someone of the opposite gender, Rosalie’s one of the ones where they raise the highest.

Even Carlisle, when Rosalie drags in this man’s bleeding carcass, goes, “Oh, is this your cousin?” And has a “Him?!” moment when Rosalie explains this is her new husband.

I always would have expected, especially after her experiences, for Rosalie to be with a woman. That said, I do think her society’s prejudices and expectations would be a huge barrier for her and she’d have to do a lot of character growth before this would ever be possible. And I mean a lot of character growth, as in, Rosalie hasn’t reached this point even post Twilight saga.

Right, regardless of gender, I think Rosalie needs a partner who a) understands her b) does not value her looks c) accepts the good and the bad parts of her.

Like all of us, Rosalie is flawed. She’s a very impressive, down right intimidating, woman who has an iron clad will and gets what she wants. She has a deep love for her family and a great capacity for compassion. However, there are times when she’s the sixteen-year-old girl who has very much not escaped her society’s mindset. She fully advocates Bella Swan’s murder so the family won’t have to move, not realizing until Carlisle points it out that this is a heinous thing to do. Rosalie says vicious, racist, things to Jake likely never realizing exactly what it is she’s saying. She’s stubborn, proud, and as Edward put it a bit pig-headed.

Emmett tends to just go “Yeah, she’s a bitch, but she’s my bitch”. Which... great, thanks Emmett, that’s very helpful.

Bella Swan is Not That Person

Bella per the start of the series is a seventeen-year-old girl with cripplingly low self-esteem, huge parental issues, and a dangerous inclination towards depression.

Bella shows serious interest in women sexually (her relationship with Alice has some serious homoerotic undertones) but she’s also very intimidated by them. Rosalie, especially, makes Bella evaluate and feel worse about herself as she knows she will never be as beautiful as this teenage blonde goddess.

In other words, this Bella is not in a position to be the kind of person Rosalie needs. She’s too caught up in figuring out who she herself is, cares very much about Rosalie’s appearance and using it to compare against her own, and isn’t stable enough to be what Rosalie needs.

And by the end of canon... Well... Bella’s left the planet and will soon join Esme in being a hauntingly strange person entirely divorced from reality.

What if we’re in a slightly AU world?

Well, we’re banking on a lot of character development for Bella that I don’t believe can happen with Edward around. Either Bella shows interest in Edward or, well, he eats her. (No, seriously, this is canon, both Alice and Edward confirm as much.)

And if the family packs up and leaves during New Moon and never comes back... Well, of all the people Bella might end up with after that, I think Rosalie might just be the least likely (not to mention Rosalie would not be down for hanging around Edward’s stupid human girlfriend).

What is Bella Looking For?

Bella’s looking for validation of her very self. She wants to be loved, more than that, she wants to be worth something.

Bella has such a low opinion of herself that, at this point in her life, she needs this feeling to come from elsewhere. She finds this in both Edward and Jacob.

And it doesn’t matter how scary they are (and both are, indeed, very scary towards her), it doesn’t matter what it is they value, just that they both seem to want her even though she’s a foolish, clumsy, pale, ugly, human, nobody, loser.

That’s all Bella wants.

Edward’s a perfect storm in that he’s inhumanly perfect, beautiful beyond all comprehension, and completely obsessed with her. In Edward’s eyes, Bella is not just perfect, she’s fascinating.

And then, of course, she’s not and it utterly destroys her.

Basically, Bella’s is a very sad life.

What Does Bella Need?

Bella needs time to grow up and find out who she is and how to value that.

Bella is your very typical teenage girl. She’s precocious, has a lot of issues growing up with her mom, but she has a lot of issues many teenage girls do have.

I think, before Bella can find a truly good partner, she needs to learn how to value herself.

This will be painful and take a lot of time. In New Moon, I think Jake actually sets her back as she uses him to find value in herself for her (essentially replacing Edward).

Only after Bella discovers who she is, reaffirms why she is important and worthy of love, can she find someone.

What does that person look like?

Well, it sure as fuck isn’t Vampire Patrick Bateman, otherwise known as Edward Cullen. Nor is it Jake Black who sexually assaults her, tells her to kiss him or he’ll kill himself, then tells her that her dying is pointless as it means he and Edward fought over nothing.

It also isn’t Alice, who treats Bella a lot like she would a life-sized Barbie Doll rather than a friend and a human being.

I’m not sure who it is, to be honest.

Someone who recognizes who Bella is, certainly, the good and the bad. Someone who is able to... reconcile her with the world she truly lives in. Maybe, circumstances changing around a bit, it’s Carlisle Cullen? (Though that would certainly be a dumpster fire of divorce and despair with Edward and Esme) Maybe it’s Jasper (also a dumpster fire of divorce and despair with Edward and Alice)?

I really have no idea here. Unlike Rosalie, I can’t even tell you what this person would need to be like.

What I do know is...

Rosalie is Not That Person

Just as Bella views Rosalie as a threat, as something to measure herself against and feel unworthy of in every way, Rosalie does the same.

Bella is a pretty human woman who captures Edward’s attention in a way she never can. Rosalie, at the time we start canon, for all her accomplishments and all she’s done is still insecure enough that she needs to be the prettiest woman in the room.

Just as Bella’s not secure enough to be what Rosalie needs, Rosalie is not secure enough to be what Bella needs.

Rosalie also doesn’t see Bella for what she is. Rosalie sees, at first, a normal boring human teenager and dismisses her. She falls into the typical Cullen trap (for all but Carlisle) that they forget humans are people too. Later, Bella discounts Rosalie’s very earnest advice and Rosalie never forgives her for it. This is understandable, Rosalie lays her soul bare, but she forgets Bella’s a teenage girl and more can’t see what Bella herself is battling with.

Bella thinks being human is worthless because Bella thinks being Bella is worthless. Children and a human future mean nothing to her.

It would take a lot, A LOT, of character development for Rosalie to be someone that Bella needs in this situation and even then... Well, they’d have to deal with the horrifying shit show that is Edward. Because if Edward/Bella isn’t happening...

It’s lunch time.

TL;DR

I’d say pin your hopes on Alice/Bella, except that one’s not happening either for all that they do have their very homoerotic friendship.

#ask #anon #twilight

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macgyvertape · 3 years

Text

thoughts on season of splicer ending

warning: spoilers for the entire season, general discussion of leaks, and absolutely being Bungie critical. Basically trying to write this out and figure out my own thoughts in the writing

I guess my first thoughts are what everyone's talking about: Osiris.

All the wild theories about if he's been replaced, controlled, playing 5d chess, etc. tldr: leaks say that from season of the Hunt it hasn't been Osiris but Savathun. Yeah I've read people's compilations of proof until I rapidly got bored with them. I'll be bluntly honest, if Bungie is going for some sort of imposter story-line then they're doing a fucking awful job at telling it.

a) A good imposter story-line needs to establish to the audience that there is the possibility or replacement/control

b) characters in the story themselves should be aware of point A and be actively considering it in their decision making

c) if the imposter is doing something the original didn't than clearly show audience the imposter is there.

I would say Bungie didn't do any of these, no the lore page of Savathun's human disguise falling apart around her doesn't count, because Bungie has long had a problem of putting story relevant plot details in lore pages and then not referencing them ingame. Lore should accentuate story, not provide key details to the story.

If you want to see a good imposter story-line look at Forsaken, and how they worked to make it obvious to someone who didn't know who Mara Sov was that something was up.

Most of the proof people cite is either cherry picking ambiguous things Osiris has said, or pointing out inconsistencies in writing. IMO not much of the evidence holds up because multiple characters this season (Saint, Lakshmi, Mithrax) have been written inconsistently with past appearances and without nuance; because their character has to carry the plot in a certain way or there are limits on recording dialogue for override/expunge.

My point in recapping the Osiris thing, is that from a thematic view at the end of the season Osiris is Osiris and I'm judging the story from the view of the season not how will the story be in the future.

very cynical take that as much praise as Bungie wants for working to make a high profile gay relationship be shown in game after a writer confirmed it on twitter

if leaks are right: if Osiris hasn't been Osiris for the past 3 seasons then none of the scenes with Saint are real or matter, and it invalidates all the emotional grief of Sagira being dead. It's 3 seasons of character development and effort wasted

or: they took the first chance they could to make one of them an unsympathetic villain and write him out of the story.

(yeah destiny has other queer character but how many of them are alive and matter to the story? When was the last time Ana's girlfriend was mentioned?)

The game is clear that for all the talk about "vex tech influence" Lakshmi's views and choices were her own, so the same for Osiris: he is responsible for helping Lakshmi and is responsible for all the civilian deaths, he's the 2ndary Human villain of the season.

Which brings me to my point (that I've seen others say) is that Bungie should have given a second thought to having their all of their human antagonists be PoC characters this expansion. Osiris, Lakshmi, and Saladin last season. For Lakshmi and Saladin they weren't just antagonists, they were written to be bigots for the community to dislike. Yes Destiny has a lot of PoC characters and anyone can be a villain, but IMO its a bad look from a company who talks so much about social justice. It wouldn't matter except Bungie wanted the message of the season to be anti-racism, and I'm comparing it within the context of how often minorities are the villains in games/US media. I don't think it was deliberately done, I just think it is something that like last season's issues with proving grounds and antisemitism they didn't care or bother with a sensitivity reader.

It's obvious this season they were going for a very obvious reference to Trump and modern day fears about refugees with Lakshmi, and it's a bad look that they did with a Indian female character and refugees are the enemy crab aliens. I'm also not saying that female characters can't be villains, but did the Bungie writers not think about just how nasty gamers would get in either slurs, insults, or expressing wishes for violence, and how pervasive and visible it would be?

I'm genuinely curious why the writers went for such a heavy handed analogy, and a story-line that feels like it comes from an afterschool special. The Eliksni have been enemies in atleast 4 expansions now, there could have been a more nuanced story other than "House of Light is good keep on killing all other Fallen". At the end of the season the game treated the attack on the City being Lakshmi and Osiris' fault, and all the people who don't like the Eliksni (say the people doing hate crimes in the lore) left with the factions so "problem resolved" . Lakshmi gets a simple karmatic death, in an area where multiple reddit threads express how they love tbagging the corpse. The ending cutscene didn't feel super inspiring to me it just felt unrealistic not just in real life where things aren't that simple but also within Destiny's story; the "you are my family" line felt cringe to me, probably because it felt unearned.

That's kind of the problem of the season isn't it, that the earliest planned game based decisions like having a Vex seasonal enemy and getting rid of the Factions determined the cast of characters with ties to the Vex and factions. So you just fight x many Vex bosses until you defeat Quria, then there's a break for Solstace, but on Reset-Tuesday with no warning things escalate because its epilogue time.

Sadly I forget who said that "it felt like the plot needed to hit one beat a week" meaning one issue had to get resolved enough for the community to talk about (except for when we take 3 weeks off for solstice). Each week there has to be some sort of hook to avoid the overblown "content drought". So multiple times you will have characters change their mind or their deep held beliefs after one counter argument is presented. (big example is Saint changing his mind not over the season but after one cutscene). City politics and factions don't matter aside from dialogue in a few different weeks because they'll be gone at the end of the season but in the meantime characters needed to talk about something to prompt fandom engagement. example: the fandom argues about governance of the last city for a while before the argument burn out since the relevant lore wasn't designed to hold up to close scrutiny.

just, I'm a politically active leftist in a red conservative state so maybe i just find this exhausting since I deal with similar issues irl and am more prone to thinking this season was tone deaf.

tldr: that wow this turned out really negative. Which I didn't really expect considering how much I enjoyed the first few weeks of the season. I enjoyed a lot of the gameplay this season (I really enjoy fun gambit aka Overrides and VoG). But as for replaying the story on my other characters, I don't think I'll bother.

#destiny 2 #season of the splicer #bungie critical #destiny critical #this is probably the most controversial thing ive posted #or atleast the most critical about things a lot of other people seem to like

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crackinwise · 3 years

Text

This is a silly idea that wouldn't leave my head about Mondo being hesitant and Taka knowing exactly what he's about. Also I apologize to Leon.

The mixing of classes 77 & 78 in the rec room on a weekend should have been a chaotic party, but there was a certain Moral Compass in attendance who'd already vetoed many of the more rowdy ideas put forth.

The current spectacle was Nekomaru arm-wrestling Sakura. The intense screaming from the two made it sound more exciting than it was: they'd been locked in the same position for like five minutes now. At least Hina was happy cheering on Sakura's straining bicep.

Bored with it, Leon moved his eyes away from the stalemate to narrow them instead at Kiyotaka, who was being felt-up as he watched the match. Okay, not felt-up. That'd actually be fun. No, Mondo just had his hand on the hall monitor's upper back, thumb moving in slow circles.

Watching the couple in public was also a disappointment, in Leon's opinion. They'd been officially together a few months and their rules for "PDA" seemed arbitrary to anyone observing. They could look at each other in ways that'd make the most romantic person gag, but wouldn't even hold hands. It appeared Mondo was only allowed to touch Taka from the shoulder-blades up. Or that's all he had the guts to do, maybe.

Boring.

'Well,' Leon thought, 'I can at least work with this.' Messing with Mondo just enough to be entertained, but not enough to be killed, was a tightrope act. Say something the biker deemed a personal attack and he's a goner, but phrasing it as a challenge or dare could usually get Mondo to go along with anything. 'I just need the one carrying the braincell to leave.'

"Hey, Ishimaru!" Leon whispered to Kiyotaka. "I think I saw Souda spiking girls' drinks."

"WHAT!" Kiyotaka immediately left to find and possibly stomp the mechanic to death. Hopefully Ultimate Nurse Mikan was around.

"Ba--Taka?" Mondo called, confused at the sudden departure.

Leon swooped in and took his arm to pull him away from the main crowd a bit. "Mondo, buddy, want to have some fun?"

His buddy suspiciously glared down at him and answered, "Depends. What's yer idea of fun?"

Leon smiled, knowing the other's curiosity was a great sign for this plan working. "I noticed your wandering hands don't wander very far," he quickly waved his arms and continued when Mondo started puffing up to yell at him, "SO I wanna help you get them to second base tonight!"

Mondo deflated and stared.

"Y-Y'know, it's a baseball metaphor because I'm-"

"I KNOW WHAT THE FUCK SECOND BASE MEANS!" Several students turned to them, unimpressed, prompting Mondo to lower his voice again. "The hell are ya gettin at?"

"Well, either you got shy hands or Taka has you whipped. Which is it?"

"Is yer idea of fun gettin ripped in half, dude?"

"Er, let me start over," Leon back-pedaled quickly. He could do this. "What's stopping you from touching Taka more than a nervous twelve-year-old on the first date?" Shit. "Shit, wait, don't hit me! I'm just curious why you've been together so long and I've never seen your hands reach the promised land!"

The other boy paused with right arm still raised in mid-punch. "Wha?"

"By 'promised land' I mean his butt." Leon took a step backwards in case he had to dodge.

Something about that made Mondo briefly look more insecure, "One: I ain't lookin to get dumped. I still dunno how handsy he'll let me get."

Then his attack-dog mode returned and he brought his raised arm to his chest to crack his knuckles. "And two: if you've been lookin at Taka's ass, I'mma tie ya up in front of the fuckin ball machine an' leave ya there."

"What? No! Gross!" Leon had been, but it was like admiring a work of art, and also not the point. "I just want my pals happy! Trust me, every time you touch his back, go lower than before. You can watch his signals or whatever, but if you go slow it'll be fine!"

Leon was proud he sounded so supportive. It was a complete lie, of course. Leon was 99.9% sure the second Mondo passed the belt line, Kiyotaka would loudly explode at his boyfriend, making the guy explode right back, and ensuring Leon finally had his entertainment for tonight.

Leon just had to make sure he won his little Mondo game first, "You should at least try before he finds someone else man enough to grab dat a-"

"YA LITTLE SHIT!"

Whoops, Leon found himself suspended off the ground by his shirt. That's going to stretch. He shouldn't have gone the toxic masculinity route. But Mondo exhaled through his nose and set him back down when he saw Kiyotaka marching back over to them. 'Whipped.'

"Souda swore his innocence, but I've made all the ladies get new drinks to be safe! And Hiro is oddly asking everyone if they need ice but it's not for the drinks...?" Kiyotaka's expression changed from bemused to wary. "Uh, was there a problem here, Mondo?"

"Nah, y'know how Leon is," Mondo's voice was disgustingly soft all of a sudden. "C'mon, I think I see Chi playing a game."

As they walked away, Leon caught Mondo rest his hand on Taka's neck then slide down to mid-back without issue. Smirking, Leon adjusted his now loose shirt collar and followed at a distance.

An hour. A whole damn hour passed watching Mondo slowly achieve touching Kiyotaka's hip! Leon wanted to scream. He didn't mean go that slow! And Taka acted like he didn't notice or care either. Leon wished Souda really was spiking drinks so he could down three.

Sayaka appeared at Leon's side, startling the redhead. "You're disappointed in him," she stated.

"Of course I'm disappointed! Dude's a gang leader and he acts like the Ultimate Gentleman!" Wait. "Wait, what do you mean? How do you...?"

"Psychi~c," she sing-songed innocently before she pointed to the couple Leon had been stalking. When Leon looked over, Kiyotaka's hand reached back to purposefully guide Mondo's hand from his hip down the short distance to the swell of his behind, and kept it there.

What? The fuck? Happened? He'd been expecting jumping, yelling, possibly some face-slapping to get on video, but definitely wasn't expecting Taka to push Mondo to the goal line. Mondo himself looked dumbstruck.

'Sonuvabitch,' Leon thought. Good for them and all but what was he supposed to do, not tease them? He sauntered up behind the two and stage-whispered, "Oi! Ass-grabbing is not welcome in a school environment!"

They yelped and jumped apart, then just as quickly whirled on him. Mondo's red face especially said Leon was in danger, but it was Kiyotaka who spoke.

"We're outside of school hours, in the rec room among friends! If public displays of affection made you uncomfortable, you could have asked instead of disturbing your peers with vulgar mockery." His arms were crossed and his eyes appeared almost aflame. He was not happy being interrupted.

"Ha," Leon pointed at the proud model student, "It was just funny catching the school mascot initiate groping. You been wanting that a while?"

There was a low growl coming from the direction of Mondo now.

Sayaka grabbed Leon's shoulder and murmured a warning, "Kuwata, you should probably let it go."

He ignored her.

Kiyotaka's eyebrows furrowed as if ready to pounce and maul Leon's face. "It was not groping. Why is it surprising I'd want my partner to touch me?"

"Babe," Mondo had stopped growling at Leon to put all his attention on his boyfriend, "it was really ok? Ya knew what I was tryin t'do all night?"

"Of course," Taka said warmly. "You were only holding me, and I'm yours, so obviously you can-"

"M-MINE?!" Mondo honest-to-god squeaked.

Leon reacted just as loudly, "Did I just hear Taka imply his ass belongs to Mondo? Kiyotaka?? Ishimaru?!"

Whoops, he was being lifted again. Only this time Mondo brought him all the way to the door and literally threw him out.

"Owww. So much for my fun."

Sayaka sighed as she walked out to Leon and handed him something. "You can thank Hiro for the ice."

#please yell at me for this ooc i rewrote it so many times #i think if sayaka and hiro teamed up the world would explode #ishimondo #kiyotaka ishimaru #mondo oowada #danganronpa #idk why i hc leon with no filter

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