#and the children of gotham know this

[emo-batboy]

Battinson being a complete child magnet.

He is so done with being a CEO with Responsibilities and would rather just hang out with his neighbors' kids and play with legos or color or some shit, and kids are incredibly perceptive to this.

They can tell when an Adult isn’t an Adult Adult. And Battinson is barely an Adult in any right. At best, he’s an angsty teenager in a 28yo body. So when they see him on the street looking like he would rather be watching cartoons than go to work at nine in the morning, they just run up to him and say, “Wanna see the chalk art I made?!” or “What’s your favorite animal? Mine’s a porcupine :)” and their parents do not understand why.

They just can’t grasp how every single child has decided that Bruce is their best friend. They try to stop their little rascals from walking up to Bruce Wayne who probably has places to be at any time of day, but Bruce just goes with it because of course he wants to see their chalk art. It’s better than going to Stupid Meetings.

He is happy to follow some random toddler who grabbed his hand and won’t stop babbling on about nonsense. Some kid wants him to join their tea party? Bruce is honored. He will never turn down the opportunity to play hide and seek with the family across the street.

Bruce gradually becomes the parent/older sibling/friend type for like every single child in Gotham. He is the Go To Babysitter for like half his block (but if we’re being honest, it’s really Alfred. Bruce is just the playmate yk?) Every kid at school is soooo jealous of Dick because his dad is that cool rich guy that buys everyone ice cream at the park and braids their hair on Career Day and will sneak them candy from the top shelf when their parents aren’t looking.

He just has that EnergyTM with kids. Bruce is not a guardian figure. He’s one of them. He’s their imaginary friend come to life. He is an Adult Child, and he has money to spend, and he knows exactly how they feel, and he is completely down to making a castle out of marshmallows instead of Doing Work.

Then one day, some middle schooler meets Batman, gets the exact same vibe from him, and goes, “Wait a minute.”

#battinson #bruce wayne #batman #the batman 2022 #batman 2022 #the batman #dick grayson #give battinson a child 2k23 #he is just #a babie #and the children of gotham know this #they can feel it #soft bruce wayne #dc universe #gotham #battinson needs a hug

[bluerosefox]

Family Resemblance

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I had another 11pm brain worm.

Enjoy

-x-x-

Daniel Wayne, the younger toddler brother of Bruce Wayne and the son of Martha and Thomas Wayne had been kidnapped the night their parents were murdered.

Daniel had been snagged the moment their killer heard people headed to the alley and Bruce in his state of shock didn't realize it until it was far to late and could only scream in horror (from everything) as his baby brother is crying his name. (If you wanna make it even more heart wrenching, make it Danny's first time being able to say Bruce's name right and/or Bruce had said some mean things to Danny earlier after he accidentally broke something of Bruce's, something like 'I wish youd go away' or 'I never wanted a brother, you're such a bother!')

Bruce is being held by Alfred as some police officers are chasing down the Wayne's parents killer while some stay behind to see if they could do something.

Minutes turn to hours and as they wait, praying the police at least found Danny, Bruce is ridden with guilt. From his parents death to allowing his brother to be kidnapped.

Eventually the police return to give Alfred and Bruce the news. And it's not good.

The killer escaped and Danny was nowhere to be found.

And it would take many years before he would be found.

-x-x-

Bruce gets a call from Damian during school hours one day. When he answers he is greeted with Damian demanding him to get to the school and explain himself.

Confused Bruce asks what does he mean and Damian responds with

"The two new students in class today are the spitting images of you and I father! Either they are poorly created clones or you have more hidden blood children!"

-x-x-

Meanwhile the very students being discussed are calling up someone too

"Ellie? Dan? What's wrong? You better not have made too much chaos already, I just paid for the uniforms for that place."

"DAD! I THINK ANOTHER ONE OF THE FRUITLOOPS FAILED CLONES SOMEHOW SURVIVED!"

"What?"

#danny phantom #danny fenton #crossover #dp x dc #blue rambles #danny phantom dc #writing ideas #random idea #dpxdc #bruce and danny are siblings #danny was a toddler when he was kidnapped #somehow someway he escaped or was dumped out of Gotham #due to how young Danny was and how traumatized he was about that night he forgot everything but his first name #no one really connected the dots that Danny was the missing Wayne child #mostly due to no public photographs of Danny #he had been born very early and no one was sure he was going to make it #and going to the theater had been his first time being finally allowed out of the manor #only for it to end in tragedy #years later though #Danny moves to Gotham with his kids #a deaged and raised from infanthood Danielle 'Ellie' Fenton and Dante 'Dan' Fenton #Damian was not ready to see them #he thinks theyre poorly made clones since one looks more like his father than him and the other is a girl #or more secret children his father didnt know about #Ellie and Dan think Damian is an escaped clone of Vlads #Bruce and Danny meet at the school and Bruce nearly has a heart attack at the young man who looks so much like his parents #Danny is a bit weirded out because Bruce looks very familiar somehow

[bruciemilf]

Somebody tell me if this is a bad take, or if my love for Bruce is causing my objective brain to glitch, but-- something about advertising Batman, a hero who's very popular for being good with children, for being NURTURING with children, a bad father kinda defeats the whole purpose of what he's supposed to represent.

Batman is a protector; He protects people the world (and especially law enforcement) does not care about. That's literally the point of him.

Something about marketing " you can be incredibly violent to people you care about! And Its fine, because you care about them even if you abuse them, and that's what matters!" towards people, but especially men and young boys, is REALLY fucked up to me.

#it's not really 'wahhh think of the children' because the media you consume isn't a vessel of your character #but. gotham war is so incredibly shallow to me for pulling the 'no no its another personality bruce would never!' like. thats worse. #you get thats worse right? #because 1) dc loves demoninsing DID for some reason but it doesn’t add any substantial weight because bruce will be associated with #the actions of his 'alter' anyway. and dc knew that. 2) if you truly cannot write an interesting comic book where bruce is not abusive #and the batkids aren't being abused. you failed. #this isn't a reprouch or an attack to people who prefer that format. but the creator isn't doing it as genuine exploration of dark tropes #if that's the case -- dont cop out with the personality thing. let him be a bad dad. but its kinda fucked how dc STILL try to paint him #as a good person while doing so. its the collen hoover effect. 'we know the guy is an abuser. thats not the problem. the problem #is that the author wants us to pretend thats a good thing.' #bruce wayne #dc comics #dc #batman #text post #dc critical

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 69

Bruce is not enjoying this situation. Somehow someone has managed to hit several people, the league included, with something or other. Now technically no one is hurt, but still, the Watchtower is not prepared for a situation like this- something he’ll need to fix- which means that… sadly he has to bring them to the cave. Where his kids are. Who haven’t been introduced to the league. 

Hopefully when the league returns to their normal ages they don’t remember any of this. Their memories are already weird anyway where they apparently know they can trust him, but don’t really remember their adult lives. 

So hopefully they don’t remember any of this because his kids are already teasing him about being such a dad and he’s worked hard to keep information about himself (and them) away from anyone outside of Gotham. 

Until then he should make sure they actually have clothing that fits and some proper food. Shut up Alfred (he’s sorry don’t take away his suit privileges-) he’s not enjoying this! 

#Bruce is the only league member not a child #prompts #dc #dcu #justice league #batman #De aged Justice Leage #except for batman #Imagine if this is #Battinson #bruce wayne #batfamily #he hasn't introduced his kids to the JL #everyone outside of gotham assumes any vigilante work is done by batman #they know Nightwing as the leader of the titans #no idea that they're family #Bruce is getting teased for going from cryptid of the night mode to tired dad mode instantly #He has like 10 kids clinging to him as his own kids coo at them #but can you imagine skrunkly lil meow meow with all the lil meta children who have decided he's dad shaped #Diana trusted him because he knows how to speak her language and is helping her #He even gave her a sword so she can defend herself if he spooks her! This man is more like a mom so she likes him! #Clark was the shyest but Duke honestly helped because he has powers too and mr Bat hasn't given him to a lab or something! #So mr bat is obviously safe- and they have a cow too! #They brought out the kiddie pool for Arthur and Jason even brought down one of his books about the ocean #They're all teasing Bruce but they've also instantly switched to sibling mode too

[martyrbat]

batman: gotham knights #2

‘Her experience of being trained almost from birth as an assassin leaves her less than fully able to acknowledge her own capacity for good. Not for doing good. But for being good. He knows all of his partners, sometimes better than he knows himself. He knows, for instance, that if Dick—Nightwing—had disobeyed his order to come back to the ship, it would have been because of his need to be useful—and because of his unabating desire to demonstrate his filial loyalty. He knows that if—Tim—Robin—had come back, it would have been because of his empathy, his inability to leave someone else in harm's way. Jason, the one he lost—he was headstrong and disregarded orders as a matter of rebellious individuation. Batman doesn't want to lose another one, which is why he wishes he didn't so well understand what brings this one back.’

#im gonna throw up. #bruce & cass #the recognition of oneself in the other and the despair at knowing what cass feels. #theyre both always going to be children with blood coating their hands and guilt devouring their minds. #they're both always going to blame themselves. bruce for not preventing the deaths of his parents. cass for taking a life. #despite it being irrational. he was a child and thats all they knew and were raised for. #the martyr complexes and how people would call them suicidal for the way they live for others with neglecting their own well-being. #forever heedless of the costs to themselves #they literally make me feel insane GOD !!!!!! #c: batman: gotham knights | i: 2 #crypt's panels #batman #bruce wayne #cassandra cain #batgirl

[amaraudermind]

DC if this was the main Gotham Crew<3

#void art #dc #stephanie brown #helena bertinelli #kate kane #and in the back is: #vic sage #renee montoya #duke thomas #cassandra cain #barbara gordon #also helena and kate aren't quite friends they've just both claimed steph as their child and share custody<3 #basically i reworked the dividing lines between the different gotham groups because i know better than dc<3 #batwoman is kinda the head of one group which includes bith questions and WAR #(kate initially thought all the robins were morons for getting involved but eventually decided to give them guidance so they didn't die) #and then babs still has the birds of prey which don't ALL work in the city but some do #and that group includes huntress and batgirl obviously. and steph does her own thing but is loosely associated with both of them #and the groups work together some obviously #and then batman and his children are still a group that exists they just don't matter as much #<3 #OH also harper and cullen are both associated with the bop btw. and wendy becomes proxy<3 #duke is the only one i drew but all the WAR kids are involved in the vigilante scene<3 #void posts

[scarecrowdrugs]

Some assorted SV Jonathan sketches I've made over the past few weeks, along with Clarice, his half-sister/daughter figure/kidnapping victim

#jonathan crane #oc: clarice keeny #shiversverse #side note: he actually does wear glasses. I just don't know how to draw them lololol #disclaimer: don't kill your mom and kidnap your sister #it turns out children hate that #SV Jonathan's early character arc is darkly hilarious #character arc of “It turns out raising a child to be just like me has consequences” #this man wasn't ready for his family murder plan getting disrupted by an seven/eight year old girl triggering his PTSD #and then panicked and stole an entire child to compensate for feeling actual emotions towards a family member #the entire ride back to Gotham consisted of a grown man and a small child dissociating in a car in complete silence #they probably had to stop at McDonald's #this grown man really stole a child to spite the mother he just murdered and then freaked out when he realized he actually got attached

[stupid-sloot-headcanons]

Also Oswald suddenly trying to hide the low-class Cockney accent he has after the broadcast of a CRIMINAL WITH THE MOST BRITISH OSWALD COBBLEPOT ACCENT POSSIBLE is almost as funny as him immediately turning into a cartoonish asshole and breaking Bruce's graduation present. Telltale Batman has a lot of stupid plot issues but it's pretty enjoyable

#like i know that gotham can house more than one British man at a time but still #nobody on the board went: hey Cobblepot kind of sounds exactly like the Children of Arkham guy #.telltale batman

[devilfic]

I pride myself on being at least somewhat knowledgeable about the batfamily but I feel like every time I see a shitpost about them there’s a new child there that wasn’t there before. which is admittedly how alfred probably feels

#mjspeaks #who is carrie? I don’t know but she’s invited to thanksgiving I suppose #I love when rogues get added too like harley because it’s not even about adopting children anymore #bruce attracting every mentally ill person in gotham and collecting them #you submit your application and it’s processed within 3-5 business days and by that I mean bruce is getting your robin suit tailored rn #batman #dc

[tallysescape]

Jason Todd is a guillotine and the Joker is Mary Antoinette

also I will die on the hill that Batman’s morals kinda suck. He wants himself up on this pedestal of doing no wrong per say, when if he did one wrong he would prevent hundreds of others. Instead he sits by in his proverbial throne above everyone else like an old man playing chess

…ah okay so. let's talk about why his morals are where they are. as we all know his parents were killed at gunpoint, he couldn’t do anything. this cements a deep, personal distaste towards guns/lethal force/killing. when he becomes batman, when he puts on the cowl and goes out to protect people from that helplessness, to save as many as he can from that pain, he does it without needless, irreparable violence. killing is not an option for him, not after that.

but that doesn’t mean he’s ignorant. that doesn’t mean he wants to be praised or idolized or placed on a pedestal, that doesn’t mean he does no wrong.

bruce has made a ton of mistakes! he’s messed up a lot! big time! he’s flawed and complicated and messy and KNOWS THAT! he knows it when he falls out with dick, he knows it when jason is murdered, he knows it when the Red Hood shows up. he knows with tim and damian too. he’s highly aware of his failures. ‘what ifs’ and ‘maybes’ are this mans mortal enemy.

bruce cares so deeply and he shows it as best he can. he’s a protector, his work humbles him, he’s his own worst critic. he doesn’t want to be placed on a pedestal and honestly i’m willing to bet he thinks the city would be better off without him! gotham’s villains see the batman as a challenge and that’s why they keep coming. sure yeah, killing the joker or any other criminal would prevent hundreds of crimes, it would save tons of innocent people from hurting, it’s an easy, full proof fix. but that’s not what the story is about.

to bruce, at the end of the day you’d have to live with the knowledge that you can never take it back a lethal strike, and that scares him. no killing is a limit he set for himself, a restraint to keep him from going too far, because if he starts he won’t be able to stop and he knows that.

he tries to instill that belief into his kids, because he knows that they can be better than he is, that they are better than he is, despite all the shit each of them have gone through. he doesn’t want them to loose that light y’know? that hope that they carried with them and brought into his life. because that’s what batman is, right? hope. hope for gotham, hope for people. hope for the future.

but of course, pushing his mortals onto them does a bit more harm than good. it’s what eventually drove dick and jason away. it’s what eventually led to a massive falling out and a heartbreaking murder a very dark time for gotham. because when jason died, that breaks bruce. he is furious and violent and hurt and he takes all of that pain and throws it mercilessly into batman. this is probably the closest he’s ever been to the brink and there’s no one to pull him back, which is when tim drake shows up with his camera and his photos and his wit and his stubborn attitude and his hope.

when jason did come back to life, he wanted vengeance, he wanted to kill the joker, he wanted to get rid of criminals permanently, to make sure no one would be hurt like him ever again. he wanted to kill the joker and bruce wouldn’t let him. he doesn’t agree with jason’s methods, but that doesn’t mean he cares any less. that doesn’t mean he wouldn’t burn down the world for his kids. all members of the batfam want to protect their city and they’re doing it as best they can. each of them have their own method, each of them are their own hero, and yes it clashes with bruce but it doesn’t change the fact that in the end, it boils down to the genuine need to help people, to make life better.

now, about the last bit, just. when has bruce ever been able to sit by and watch? all these kids running around with makeshift capes and iron wills, when has he sat back and just watched it happen? if all bruce did was observe from above, then we wouldn’t have batman. no, bruce sees the violence and stands and does something about it, tries to break the cycle.

he sees dick, angry and hurt and grieving, with a burning need for justice and the drive to go out and find it himself, and sees himself in this ten year old kid. so he does something about it, because it’s too late for him but maybe he can make it better for the kid. he takes dick in and teaches him, watches him make a name for himself. Robin and then Nightwing.

he sees jason, who is literally is trying to steal the batmobils tires. who’s standoffish and weary and seen the worst that gotham has to offer but is still kind. and batman picks him up by the scruff and takes him home and absorbs him into the family, teaching him to be robin and mourning when he’s gone.

he sees tim—or better, tim is the one sees him—with his unshakable faith and terrible self esteem and hopeful, calculating eyes.

he sees stephanie and cass and duke and damian, he sees them all and he teaches each them everything he knows, trains them to the absolute best of his ability and tells them over and over that bats don’t kill, but in the end that’s all he can do. it’s a choice that they have to make when it comes down to it. a bar they have to set for themselves.

bruce is not a cold, unfeeling asshole with a superiority complex. despite the act, he isn’t. he’s just some guy dressed like a bat trying to make this house a home. if he was an unfeeling asshole with a superiority complex, then he wouldn’t go around adopting kids left and right. he could’ve just let them run off on the streets, trying to fight crime and solve mysteries all on their own. but he didn’t. he wouldn’t. and that says something.

#dances dances #i’m. very passionate about batman #maybe a little insane even #but yeah #he learns from his children and he learns from his mistakes and he cares and he hopes and he loves #yes bruce has messed up yes he’s done things that hurt the family but he’s not heartless #yes his refusal to kill the joker strained his relationship with jason but that doesn’t mean he was outright DEFENDING joker #yes jason is also valid for wanting to kill the joker and wanting to avenge himself??? like #jason isn’t heartless either #yeah he used lethal force and was willing to kill but that doesn’t mean he cared less about protecting people #he still wanted to keep gotham safe and he did it how he thought was right #the batfam is messy and complicated and their morals are all valid in their own right and it’s wonderful?? #anyways uh #yeah #i like them a lot #i had to have this proof read by my friend bc i didn’t know if. i knew what i was talking about hshdhHSHDF #shout out to my bff jayme for listening to me ramble for two hours

[irisbaggins]

Honestly? Whilst I am far away from finishing the game, Gotham Knights, so far, is incredibly fun. Of course I have my gripes about it, but oh my, does it give me Bat Family content so unapologetically! And confirming not only that most (if not all) of its members are queer, but also explicitly stating that queerness have always existed in Gotham, and that its Theatre was one of the staples of it. Finding that scrapped script in the Theatre made my heart burst, because they're creating a history of Gotham, one that was lived and fought for and bled for, one that feels real. And honestly, for that alone, the world-building they did for this game, it makes all of the clunkiness worth it.

Also Bruce drunkenly dancing on an ice sculpture while the Penguin desperately and pleadingly tries to get him thrown out. My favourite scene, makes the agonising task preceding it worth it.

#text_iris #Gotham Knights #ALSO looove Bruce's video logs as his psuedo therapy logs #Him talking about his children? Makes me sob #Also him talking about Jason and wanting him HOME and swallowing his own trauma so Jason will feel at home #Brushing away all the murder because he KNOWS what kind of man Jason is and Jason is BETTER than Bruce #Anyway I love this game so far. Still at chapter three tho lmaooo #Hate the open world quests ngl

[righteousruin]

wait I was joking about the 'nubane is obviously a clone' is that actually what they did LMAO

#I don't know what's going on I have no context I don't want context why is there a lab in santa prisca where they're all wearing bane masks #I'M CRYING WHAT IS THIS #I do love the idea that Bane is celebrated in Santa Prisca and it's US communities though that's sweet #this is some joker title with an X-22 storyline but his dialogue and characterization seems SO MUCH BETTER and for this I am grateful blESS #there is hope for him yet #still side-eyeing all the HQ titles that make him really skinny without venom......man is -- once again -- 350lbs sober #I'm not even mad about Vengeance I just came here from Marvel so clone children are a little played out for me aklsdj #spoilers?? this is probably years old #oh thank god i really don't have to read all of that I really can just say it was a clone the whole time and it's caNON LMAO #idk shit about this title but whatever author decided to flip off everyone who wrote bane like shit I am ENTHUSIASTICALLY shaking your hand #absolutely love the idea that bane was just out somewhere fuckin around while a clone was in gotham ruining everyone's life full time #go girl protect your peace laksjd #still don't love this title in which bane says he hates batman -- objectively untrue -- mostly -- a lot of the time -- some of the time #it's complicated don't look at me #ooc

[mckinlily]

Plot armor but it’s Bruce Wayne’s wealth.

Bruce is one of the richest men in the world. Bruce does not want to be one of the richest men in world.

He starts by implementing high starting salaries and full health care coverages for all levels at Wayne Enterprises. This in vastly improves retention and worker productivity, and WE profits soar. He increases PTO, grants generous parental and family leave, funds diversity initiatives, boosts salaries again. WE is ranked “#1 worker-friendly corporation”, and productively and profits soar again.

Ok, so clearly investing his workers isn’t the profit-destroying doomed strategy his peers claim it is. Bruce is going to keep doing it obviously (his next initiative is to ensure all part-time and contractors get the same benefits and pay as full time employees), but he is going to have to find a different way to dump his money.

But you know what else is supposed to be prohibitively expensive? Green and ethical initiatives. Yes, Bruce can do that. He creates and fund a 10 year plan to covert all Wayne facilities to renewable energy. He overhauls all factories to employ the best environmentally friendly practices and technologies. He cuts contracts with all suppliers that engage in unethical employment practices and pays for other to upgrade their equipment and facilities to meet WE’s new environmental and safety requirements. He spares no expense.

Yeah, Wayne Enterprises is so successful that they spin off an entire new business arm focused on helping other companies convert to environmentally friendly and safe practices like they did in an efficient, cost effective, successful way.

Admittedly, investing in his own company was probably never going to be the best way to get rid of his wealth. He slashes his own salary to a pittance (god knows he has more money than he could possibly know what to do with already) and keeps investing the profits back into the workers, and WE keeps responding with nearly terrifying success.

So WE is a no-go, and Bruce now has numerous angry billionaires on his back because they’ve been claiming all these measures he’s implementing are too expensive to justify for decades and they’re finding it a little hard to keep the wool over everyone’s eyes when Idiot Softheart Bruice Wayne has money spilling out his ears. BUT Bruce can invest in Gotham. That’ll go well, right?

Gotham’s infrastructure is the OSHA anti-Christ and even what little is up to code is constantly getting destroyed by Rogue attacks. Surely THAT will be a money sink.

Except the only non-corrupt employer in Gotham city is….Wayne Enterprises. Or contractors or companies or businesses that somehow, in some way or other, feed back to WE. Paying wholesale for improvement to Gotham’s infrastructure somehow increases WE’s profits.

Bruce funds a full system overhaul of Gotham hospital (it’s not his fault the best administrative system software is WE—he looked), he sets up foundations and trusts for shelters, free clinics, schools, meal plans, day care, literally anything he can think of.

Gotham continues to be a shithole. Bruce Wayne continues to be richer than god against his Batman-ingrained will.

Oh, and Bruice Wayne is no longer viewed as solely a spoiled idiot nepo baby. The public responds by investing in WE and anything else he owns, and stop doing this, please.

Bruce sets up a foundation to pay the college tuition of every Gotham citizen who applies. It’s so successful that within 10 years, donations from previous recipients more than cover incoming need, and Bruce can’t even donate to his own charity.

But by this time, Bruce has children. If he can’t get rid of his wealth, he can at least distribute it, right?

Except Dick Grayson absolutely refuses to receive any of his money, won’t touch his trust fund, and in fact has never been so successful and creative with his hacking skills as he is in dumping the money BACK on Bruce. Jason died and won’t legally resurrect to take his trust fund. Tim has his own inherited wealth, refuses to inherit more, and in fact happily joins forces with Dick to hack accounts and return whatever money he tries to give them. Cass has no concept of monetary wealth and gives him panicked, overwhelmed eyes whenever he so much as implies offering more than $100 at once. Damian is showing worrying signs of following in his precious Richard’s footsteps, and Babs barely allows him to fund tech for the Clocktower. At least Steph lets him pay for her tuition and uses his credit card to buy unholy amounts of Batburger. But that is hardly a drop in the ocean of Bruce’s wealth. And she won’t even accept a trust fund of only one million.

Jason wins for best-worst child though because he currently runs a very lucrative crime empire. And although he pours the vast, vast majority of his profits back into Crime Alley, whenever he gets a little too rich for his tastes, he dumps the money on Bruce. At this point, Bruce almost wishes he was being used for money laundering because then he’s at least not have the money.

So children—generous, kindhearted, stubborn till the day they die the little shits, children—are also out.

Bruce was funding the Justice League. But then finances were leaked, and the public had an outcry over one man holding so much sway over the world’s superheroes (nevermind Bruce is one of those superheroes—but the public can’t know that). So Bruce had to do some fancy PR trickery, concede to a policy of not receiving a majority of funds from one individual, and significantly decrease his contributions because no one could match his donations.

At his wits end, Bruce hires a team of accounts to search through every crinkle and crevice of tax law to find what loopholes or shortcuts can be avoided in order to pay his damn taxes to the MAX.

The results are horrifying. According to the strictest definition of the law, the government owes him money.

Bruce burns the report, buries any evidence as deeply as he can, and organizes a foundation to lobby for FAR higher taxation of the upper class.

All this, and Wayne Enterprises is happily chugging along, churning profit, expanding into new markets, growing in the stock market, and trying to force the credit and proportionate compensation on their increasingly horrified CEO.

Bruce Wayne is one of the richest men in the world. Bruce Wayne will never not be one of the richest men in the world.

But by GOD is he trying.

#batman #bruce wayne #laws of this dc universe say Gotham is always a hellcity #and bruce wayne is always filthy rich #bruce wayne is fighting with everything he has against both those facts #he’s not going to win #but he’s not going to stop either #bruce crying with fistfuls of money in his hands: take it. PLEASE #the public: donate more???

[redsray]

the funniest part of any Robin meeting the JL is that every Robin is so distinctly different from the previous one in terms of personality and vibes that the league literally gets backlash. and like, I don't blame them. not to mention that they are non-meta children that dress as a traffic light and fight crime alongside batman in gotham on a nightly basis. i'd also be a bit concerned. Batman, literally The Night of Gotham personified in the League's eyes, coming into a JL meeting: This is Robin, my crime-fighting partner. 11-year-old Dick Grayson, dressed in the brightest primary colours possible, vaguely hidden murder behind those eyes, never stops moving even for a moment: Hi! Superman: That's a child. That's-- Bats that is a child. You let a child--? Batman, deadpan: You try to stop him. Would you rather he try and murder a grown man with a wire?

Batman: This is Robin. 12-year-old Jason Todd, with the biggest grin on his face, about 3 books in his hand, stars in his eyes and a distinct street-kid drawl: Hey!!! Green Lantern: That's ... that's a different child. What?? Jason: I stole his tires :) Batman: Tried to. Jason, stage whispering to the League: basically did. Green Lantern: that is a different kid, right?? I'm not seeing shit??

Batman: This is Robin. 14-year-old Tim Drake, bo staff clutched in his hand, a wary and tired expression on his face, more on the quiet side, the literal walking definition of don't judge a book by it's cover: hello Flash: Where do you even find these-- Tim: I found myself.

Batman: This is Robin. 17-year-old Stephanie Brown, literally blonde, with a shit-eating grin, eyes full of nothing but mischief and the most explosive personality you've ever seen: hiya!! Superman: I give up. Stephanie: I know, I have that amazing effect on people.

Batman: This is Robin. 13-year-old Damian Wayne, a literal wet cat that will hiss at you, has a sword, the most judgemental stare you'll get from a teenager, ready to jump anyone there: Green Lantern: WHY DOES HE HAVE A SWORD?! Batman: ... he came with the sword.

#batman #batfam #tim drake #jason todd #dick grayson #damian wayne #stephanie brown #dc comics #icb i posted this w/o tags the first time #what is wrong w me #superman: where do you find these kids #bruce: they just show up tbh #especially tim. he LITERALLY just showed up #anyone: so which one is really robin? #bruce: they are all really robin. #bruce: dick wanted to kill a man. #jason tried hijacking my tires in CRIME ALLEY. #tim just appeared and made himself robin that was NOT me #stephanie also wanted to kill a man. #damian did kill a man. or two. #YOU try to parent these kids then come back to me clark

[adreamfromnevermore]

AU Where the Justice League forms as usual except for one slight difference where Bruce just so happens to have been the one superheroing for the longest. (Excluding Diana, who got up to it in World War 1 and then mostly didn't while she learned about Man's World)

Bruce helps form the Justice League, ignoring all of the comments as they come to the sudden realization that Gotham's baby cryptid story is actually a man in a very intimidating armored suit who can and will break your arm if you cause problems for him. They are unaware that this is not the first team he's led, and actually he's used to teams full of mostly teenagers who also happen to be his children. This should be easier, this team is primarily adults.

He realizes rapidly that he doesn't understand these people.

His kids take bonding activities to mean learning a dozen different ways to break someones leg. That doesn't fly with these people. And that is most of Bruce's ideas, hell when he was a kid Alfred took every opportunity to get him out of his room and mostly that was with the agreement that Alfred would teach him how to defend himself. He's come by it honestly.

This team is not easier. They have more drama than when his house was actually full of kids. It's insane. He doesn't know what to do with it, usually he just sent the kids to their rooms or grounded them from patrol. That doesn't work here.

He comes to a strange crossroads. That falls apart when he forgets who he's working with and snaps at Hal with a full room of heroes that the next person to throw a punch or an insult without a reason too will be sparring with him.

A long standing rule in the batcave that worked two fold to prevent infighting between the kids and too ensure that they were well and truly trained.

It works wonders. No one says a word out of line for the rest of the debrief. Bruce becomes the unofficial mediator of the league over Clark because anytime he walked in on a fight it suddenly became 10 times more civil out of sheer terror of what he'd do to them in a sparring match.

Eventually they actually meet his kids. Well, one kid.

Half way through a mission (one of the rare ones in Gotham) the Bat comes to a complete stop at the edge of an alley. Every single league member on the team comes to a stop behind him. Slowly from the shadows of the alley a man in a red helmet stalks out to greet them.

"You don't call, you don't write"

"Red Hood."

"Don't Red Hood me! We've been worried sick!"

"I was at the cave last night."

"You didn't answer my texts B. You always answer my texts."

Somehow it ends with big and scary following them through the rest of the mission with a running commentary of how much Bats has let him down in his failure to respond in a timely manner to a text send less than an hour before he ran into them in the alley. It only ends when Red Robin shows up.

And even then it only ends because Hood can't keep himself from throwing a punch and Bruce has to snap at him that if he throws another one they're sparring when they get home.

And by god is Jason giving up the chance to punch his brothers.

#the psychic whiplash when the league realizes #that the pit fight tactic is from dealing with his children #also that he has children #batman #dc #bruce wayne #red hood #jason todd #red robin #tim drake #batfamily #clark kent #justice league #superman #nightwing #timothy drake #batfam #fic ideas #wonder woman #diana prince #diana of themyscira

[nerdpoe]

Danny, in his forties, knows he passes for two people; Bruce Wayne and some randomass reporter named Clark Kent. Which is great, because he's about to defend Bruce Wayne's son, and it'd be weird if the press thought he was just some rando.

Danny didn't want to know who the fuck Bruce Wayne was, but Sam's parents would not shut up about the guy as Danny was growing up.

So, yeah; he can recognize Bruce Wayne on site. And his children.

Not because he stalked them! It was all Sam's fault, her and her parents! Her for complaining about the Waynes, and her parents for idolizing them!

Anyways, he's pretty sure he just saw some chick drug Dick Grayson's quadruple sugar caramel frappe, and Dick drank it.

Danny doesn't really think? He kind of just moves.

Dick Grayson barely gets out a "Uh, hey-?" before Danny decks the bitch in the face hard enough to throw the woman back five feet.

She's definitely going to need a hospital.

Danny doesn't give a fuck.

Danny gives so little fucks that he just puts a very carefully gentle hand on Dick Grayson's shoulder and steers him away from the scene.

"She roofied your drink. I'm taking you to the hospital."

Or; Dick was going to allow a Trafficker to drug him, so that he could play bait. The trackers he'd swallowed would absolutely lead Jason to where he was taken, as Jason was working with him on this, but didn't meet the traffickers "type". He didn't tell Bruce he was going to do this. So when the Rohypnol starts to kick in, he's absolutely sure he sees Bruce come in out of nowhere and wreck the Trafficker's shit. The randos filming the incident think they just saw someone's dad almost murder a bitch, and then heard said dad mention roofies. When the videos are posted online, and the dad is "identified" as Bruce Wayne, Bruce has three things happen. First; he's getting a lawsuit from the woman. Second; he's also getting notified through this that he has a doppleganger or clone. He will need to investigate, as he needs to thank the man. Third; his image has become pristine in the eyes of Gotham, and has also become yet another wholesome meme.

#dpxdc #dcxdp #dp x dc #dc x dp #phanfic #story prompt