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zai-doodles · 1 year

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Ok ok last question then I’ll stop bothering you lol (but I eagerly look forward to anything you will say in the future about fairytail!)

I think I got your thoughts on Nalu, but what about other ships? You said Gajeel and Levy are your fav ship, could you tell us more why? What about Gray x Juvia? Do you have a least favorite ship?

(And don’t be sorry for rambling a lot/your posts being long! I really enjoy reading your thoughts!)

bestie i literally love u i never have the chance to post my ft hc stuff im THRIVING

aight so im going to make enemies with this post i can feel it in my bones gjkfdhgsfdkj

however i just want to say if u like these ships thats completely fine and if you read them diffrently than i do thats also dope

so lets start positive!! i LOVE gajevy sm its so perfect i just ljdghfkjd

no listen like the thing that gets me abt gajevy is how it elevates gajeel as a character SO MUCH and gives levy so much agency at the same time, like u cant tell me ft would have embraced gajeel the way they did if levy didnt CHOOSE to forgive gajeel in some capacity and like fuck imagine ur GAJEEL in this situation like bro wakes up everyday and this is just his life

gajeel lost metalica at a young age, and (i dont remember too much of canon but im pretty sure its implied he just kinda fucked around until phantom tropue picked him up which yikes) like this CHILD was on his own most of his formative years and then got picked up by a super shitty abusive group of ppl and he just LEARNED to blend in, like yea metalica made him kind of a punk but he was a KID so during those years he was alone he probably just closed himself off to survive and learned to prioritize himself over everybody else and to do that it takes a level of desensitizing urself to others pain

and like ok again im playing hard and fast with canon but i THINK its implied he like, had done a lot of bad shit with them or whatever right? like what he did to levy and fairy tail wasn't NEW, so when the events in canon happen and he ends up at fairy tail, in my mind that's the FIRST TIME he has to face how HIS ACTIONS DIRECTLY HURT SOMEONE

and not only thats but someone who OBJECTIVELY DIDN'T DESERVE IT

like ugh gajeel just,, having to learn to let himself care but also it fucking sucks bc it just makes it set in more and more what a bad person he is (he isnt but he thinks he is) THEN FUCKING LEVY PULLS UP AND JUST?? IS THE BEST???

she literally blows thro all his expectations of her bc at this point i think hes use to dealing with ppl being afraid of him bc that ssomething he understands and control, what he DOESNT understand is her being NICE to him and it makes him RESPECT her and its so out of no where that by the time the GMG roles around and gajeel has fully accepted the fact that he indeed has emotions like everyone else, ONLY TO HAVE TO FACE LEVY BEING SCARED OF HIM AGAIN

learning to put others needs above his own and being empathetic in his own fucked up way

ok enough positivity time to make ppl mad

gonna link my juvia is a lesbian post here bc it sums up a LOT of my feelings on gruvia but the tldr is that my personal hc is that juvia is a lesbian with a serious case of comp het from trying to fit in with other kids growing up and it literally was just never corrected until she got to fairy tail and actively started to form friendships

the main reason i dislike gruvia is that it paints gray as the one who needs to change in order to accept juvias feelings and not just cuz he needs to grow as a person and learn to allow himself to be vunrable.

like grays arc doesnt ONLY center around juvia but its a big part of it and juvias growth CENTERS around gray and we can talk about the the borderline misogynist idea of having a female character whos damn near whole identity is her feelings for a man where she never grows or learns meaningfully but instead just very slowly chills out more so from being sidelined than growth but i digress i just dont like them

last is jerza,, i just dont like em,, jellal is really boring in my opinion and he had a lot of potential but meh? his redemption is neat and his history with erza has potential but i feel like the point of erzas arc is about growth and moving on and while i think her and jellal can still be friends and have each others back she still has so much healing to do after tower of heaven

idk i dont see a lot wrong with jerza i just feel like its a lil bland and not my cup of tea

and yes queer platonic nalu is my life id die for them actually and i have more stuff about natsus abandonment issues and how they carry into his relationships with ppl but imma stop bc this post is long jgkfhgdjhfdjk

tldr: i love gajevy, actively dislike gruvia, very meh about jerza, love qpp nalu

#zai talks #fairy tail

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gyubby99 · 1 year

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I NEED ANOTHER UPDATE.

I NEED TO KNOW THE TOUR.

I NEED TO KNOW HOW ELLALI AN ROSASTAR CATCH UP.

PLEASE. IM BEGGING. I WILL DO ANYTHING FOR THIS.

I WILL EVEN ADMIT MY TRAUMA IF YOUD JUST UPDATE. GIVE ME MORE.

DONT LOSE UR HEAD!!!!

The tour went on in silence. Hope walked frantically, checking every hallway as it'd been her first time in someone else's castle. Ever since some countries has heard of the war they all had to cut off all contacts and buisnesses of some sort with Calvania, and Morellia had been thriving ever since despite having two queens with more money than they could spend in a lifetime and not a single man around to tell them what to do with it.

Isaac had never bothered to say a word to her nor offer his arm to her like he did a while back. It could've been a blessing in disguise, but Hope was feeling a bit more, leaning away to the idea of being happy.

This confused the young princess. She was supposed to hate the enemy, not feel this sinking feeling when they're upset and moreover, she made them upset. She never understood why in a blink of an eye, if she had a choice, she'd take back what she said.

Then.. she stopped.

A portrait of a woman. A beautiful one, with brown hair and eyes deep blue as the ocean she'd sail. She studied her for a moment, her eyes trailing from the freckles that dappled her face, to the sword she wielded in her hand.

She was extremely beautiful.

"That's my grandmother. Clarissa Gale." Isaac then spoke. "She died when princess Mia was born."

A faint memory flashed through Hope's head. She saw quite the same picture back in the castle, when the maids were cleaning up after her.

"She's a swordswoman?" Hope asked in genuine curiosity.

"A pirate queen. She met my grandfather at the docks." Isaac responded, sternly.

Hope's focus was still on the woman in front of her. A part of her wanted to ask more questions, while a part of her knew Isaac wouldn't like to entertain him unless he was extremely bored, which as of the moment he isn't.

He hated her, ofcourse.

But despite his hatred he'd managed to laugh and flash her a smile, though in a cocky manner. She should've been enjoying his misery, but she grew too fond of the other side that wasn't bothered by people who never cared. He was free-spirited and happy, he was lucky he'd gotten the freedom she desperately wanted to get herself.

Hope loved her father, more than anything except Asher and Rosalyn. All she ever wanted was for him to be proud of her, and so that's why she wanted to take Isaac down. She was being driven by the pressure she put on herself. As heir to the throne she wanted her father to be happy, taking care of the things out of her responsibility.

And so when she meddled with Isaac's life, she never told him. She wanted so desperately to have him look at her with such pride that she was willing to creep up to the enemy's lair. Alistar would rather lay down on a bed of nails than to ever put the pressure on Hope, but she wanted him to know that his little rose's thorns could prick the dove's eye.

She never talked to him much, but she knew how much he hated Ella for replacing him with a blacksmith with little to no knowledge about monarchy. Queen Ella was a traitor, and that was the hill she's prepared to die on.

But the look on Isaac's face.. right then and there.

It told her something different.

There was a traitor, but never a choice to become one.

Maybe it was Isaac, maybe it was the genuine face of the pirate woman, or the peer pressure she trapped herself into that brought her to the thought that there was more than a savy educated young princess and her downgraded replacement.

If she looked into things a little further on this tour, she may have the answers to what she's speculating.

"Isaac."

That was the first time she said his name without a trace of mockery.

His monotone eyes looked at her, curious as to why she'd called his name in a way he's never heard before.

"Did your father make that belt?" Hope asks.

Isaac was baffled and stunned by the question. He never knew why out of all things, his belt came to her curiosity.

And moreover, his father.

"Yes." Isaac replied, a hint of confusion in his tone.

Hope studied his belt, neatly and carefully crafted from the golden colored (or just gold in general) buckle to the end tip, the strap wrapped tightly around up his pants.

Gazing at his eyes that shone silver, once fired anger and now showed confusion, she swallowed.

For the first time in her life, looking at Isaac made her tense.

"He did quite well." She stated, cryptic. "In his craftmanship, ofcourse."

Isaac tilted his head. He was thinking that she meant his father did quite well on the belt, but after she had something else to say, an idea occured to him that she thought he may have been thinking of something else his father did quite well.

Hope turned her back on him as she kept walking along.

~~~~

Sounds of wine glasses clattering filled the whole castle in worry for the king and queen. At this point his constant tempers have been getting a lot worse, considering that everywhere Alistar went to, everything reminded him of how pathetic he was losing to a kingdom ran by two women.

He'll never be a man. If he was, he would've asserted dominance and power over them.

He was a disappointment. He couldn't fathom the look on his father's face if he ever knew that his one and only son had disappointed him, destroyed his family line's legacy and the brennan name overall.

"Alistar!" Rosalyn shouted. "You're going to break everything!"

"So what if I break everything?! Everything.. everything my father's worked hard for... down the fucking drain all because of that traitor! I was supposed to have power.. I was supposed to be king!" Alistar yelled at his wife from across the room.

"You ARE king!" Rosalyn reasoned. "Don't let yourself turn into a power-hungry bastard! Don't be your father. Please, mi vida.."

Despite knowing that her husband could throw a glass at her for being 'invasive' of his personal space, she wrapped her arms around him, resting her cheek on his back.

Alistar shook his head in disappointment of himself.

From somewhere not so far away from them, two children were playing inside of their shared room.

Another clattering of a glass. The princess' frantic worrying hid behind the facade of an entertainer, for an important reason.

Princess Hope wasn't made of glass that he could shatter if he wanted to, she was made of stone. She knows when she has to be strong for both her and Asher's sake.

She swallowed, paying attention to she and Asher's little game rather than listening to the sounds from downstairs.

He was important to her. More than anything.

"The lost fairies cry out!" Hope shouted. "Brrrr!!" She imitated the sound of an elephant. She held the small giraffe toy figure from the side and was about to imitate its sound.. when she had no idea what sound it made. "What sound does the giraffe make?"

Asher shrugged.

"Nevermind." Hope shook her head.

"They wake the fairy queen who breaks the spell and saves everyone!" Hope cheered in triumph, throwing the small 'goblin' figure onto the floor to declare that it had 'died'.

Asher laughed. "You're always loud when you play, Hope!"

Hope shrugged. "What can I say? I like being in the moment!"

The siblings laughed.

As the laughter died down, Asher looked at his older sister, who was starting to come up for the closing of their fairytale.

Asher would give anything to be her. She had been his role model since he first learned to acknowledge her as his sister. She was fierce, brave, and is always there to lighten things up when they needed to be. She was the epitome of a sunlight, which she got from her mother. A strong-willed princess who would always put everyone else's needs before hers.

He could never feel jealous of her, even if their father seemed to favor her more than him.

Everything. Everything he talked about was her. Hope, and her talent, remarkable traits, dashing personality, her being fit for the throne more than anyone could ever be.

He didn't know where he got the urge to ask, but words came out of his mouth.

"Hope?" Asher called.

"Yes?" Hope responds.

"Why does papa like you more than me?" Asher asks, more curious rather than upset.

Hope was taken aback by what her brother had just asked. "Why would you say that?"

"He always pays more attention to you. He gets scared when he looks at me.." Asher responds to his sister.

"Scared? What do you mean by that?"

Asher pouts. "When papa looks at me, he's always sad or scared. But when he looks at you, he's always smiling."

Hope never realized her brother felt this way. He wasn't supposed to be worrying about who the favorite child is. He was only ten, and is currently having no clue that their parents actually might hurt each other. As aware as he was about his father breaking things, when Hope had witnessed it, she knew better than to let her brother see what it was actually like seeing them fight. He always heard the sounds, but Hope did her very best to keep him out of it.

He didn't need the pain. If pain is to be held then it is by Hope, she was the big sister. She's stronger, older and wiser.

"Ash.." Hope scooted closer to her brother, wrapping an arm around him. "He loves us both. I don't know why papa acts like he does, but I know he's trying. He's trying to be a good father to us. I know he is."

Asher leaned his head onto his sister's shoulder. "I just want papa to be happy when he sees me.."

Hope sighed. "I know." She held his hands as she scooted in front of him. "But look. I'm happy when I see you!"

Asher tilted his head as a smile formed in his lips.

"Because I can get to.." Hope smirked deviously. And the next thing Asher knew, her hands were all over his waist, tickling him. "Tickle you until you yield!"

Asher laughs, trying to stop Hope. "I yield! I yield!"

Hope laughed along with him.

Of all things she could protect, he would always come first. And along all those things, she would give what it takes to make her family proud.

~~~~~

Hope glanced one last time at the portrait of Clarissa Gale, how her plans had miraculously shifted all of a sudden. All because a certain prince decided to meddle into them.

And so she walked along with Isaac trailing behind her, catching up.

Who knew keeping the enemy close would work wonders for her? She never knew why, and she hated to admit it, but keeping Isaac to her side would be essential on her new change of plans.

A plan to figure out what problem caused the war.

#the prophecy of immortal fire #hisacc enemies to lovers #hope and asher has my heart

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poohwhin · 1 year

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𝐌𝐲 (𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐚𝐛𝐞 𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬) 𝐌𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐥𝐚 𝐂𝐚𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐮𝐞 𝐕𝐨𝐥. 𝟒 𝐓𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬

I’m putting them under the cut not only because they might be long but also so those who don’t care abt this can scroll. SKSK. (and also because I’ll be using images)

also if you wanna see my “real time” reactions i have a thought dump post.

anyways i’m not a theorist or someone smart enough to analyse anything i just have a lotta thoughts.

To start, I really enjoy the inclusion of the creation story from the bible— and how it confirms that Gabriel’s been here from the START. Man honestly said “if you want something done, hit it at the source.” And ofc we have the signature forbidden fruit event, and Eve becoming painfully aware of “the man in the sky.” Tbh I just love any edition with Gabriel because he’s literally the root of everyone’s problems so I want more of him.

I also really love the background that we get for Thatcher, and the BPS crew. Thatcher’s life after Ruth’s death, the melancholy and SADNESS he’s feeling— all the while alternates are invading his home as well as impersonating him. As for the BPS crew, i love how they were just a couple of high school kids who formed a club, yet were not prepared for the actual demons adam was exposing them to. (and come to find out that Adam may be an alternate himself? or SOME OTHER ENTITY? ever since the age of 4?? man)

let me spin back to thatcher real quick because his letter to ruth had me SOBBING. and CRYING. he was so scared, and that got her killed. and even his alternate is taunting him (with his face i might add) like “alive or dead you serve no purpose.” god.

Adam’s memorial video for Jonah was so goofy but also the edited in(?) scenes were pretty inch resting. I’m intrigued about the drawing of the preacher?? the messenger?? im a fake fan i barely know these alternate names. but i wanna know who drew that and what they wrote beside it. Also Adam my sweet boy adding “rate 5 stars and subscribe” was FOUL.

Anyways on to my most jarring experience from this video because I am. FLOORED. Face studio. Face Studio 2. Where the hell is the first one, and how the hell did alternates learn to code.

they’re sitting at their little desktops kicking their feet and twirling their stolen hair as pick which face mask to put on.

but then it transitions to footage of lynn’s home with an alternates face speaking on screen. and if i heard everything correctly, it was like:

“a thriving society of followers of the true saviour. his entangled (?) limbs danced around my bedroom. i held my breath. and waited for it to stop. i was too scared.”

but it glitched out after that, plus i could barely make anything out. anyways i think this is cryptic is cool.

then the moment that everyone and their MOTHER was talking about is dave’s encounter with gabriel 🫶this entity literally SPLIT THE HEAVEN’S AND DAVE’S MENTAL STABILITY IN HALF. (rip dave. i’ll box alex logan paul style and avenge you /j )

he just wants to talk about his car’s extended warranty <3

i hate the fact that this mf is stanley. why couldnt stanley have just been a silly little rubber band man. nah but i love how, even though the previous images were just a photoshop choice alex made for scare factor; i love the thought that his face looks different each time you see him being a result of his “contorted flesh and broken bones.” but please somebody get this man a friend so he stops stealing people’s children.

also his conversation with Adam really has me thinking more than i’d like to admit. and has me wondering if adam is already an alternate, and if he is: how long has he been one? it’d be interesting if a drastic change like that was happening to the children the intruder abducts (unless its an adam specific thing). but then his images being shown at the end make me question that. SKSKS.

i dont even KNOW HOW TO FEEL ABOUT THIS. HGGGGGGG. and adam’s photos presumably to be uploaded onto Face Studio being shown right afterwards? man.

an already cataclysmic situation is about to become an intergalactic problem 🫶

also;

remembrance. the action of remembering something. the action of remembering the dead, especially in a ceremony. a memory or recollection.

correspondence. a close similarity, connection, or equivalence. communication by exchanging letters with

malignance. the quality of being malign. (evil in nature or effect; malevolent.)

these three words appeared in pretty distinct spots so i think thats cool. i love alex’s usages of SAT words SKSKSSK

ANYWAYS. THESE ARE MY THOUGHTS. i really enjoyed Vol. 4, and was glad to get some more information on the world Alex’s creating <3 (as well as the buildup to the climax?) anyways ty for coming to my rambling. 🫶

#; poo talk #; tmc rant #mandela catalogue

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arleniansdoodles · 1 month

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Seeing as you are the reason i and im sure many others got into sifu i will he holding you accountable by forcing you to give any and all of your thoughts on sifu (specifically the dynamic between Sean, Mc, and Yang) (only if u want tho)

You dont understand i thrive on insane fandom conversations it pains me that there is basically none of that surrounding Sifu

Hahahaa duly noted, anon! If I’m indeed the reason for getting some more people into Sifu, then it’s an honour! XD And no worries at all, I too enjoy the fandom convos and rambling about headcanons; the Sifu fandom’s been pretty lonely in that regard 😅 So I shall proceed to hand over my Sifu headcanons!! Also, there may be some spoilers for my Sifu fic, but it’s mostly just a summary of the backstory stuff loll And this also got pretty long, so I’ve put most of it under a read-more tag 😉

The dynamic between Yang, MC, and Sean is my absolute favourite to think about! Starting with Yang – I headcanon that he was orphaned at a young age after losing his family to illness (which kickstarts his fear of losing loved ones). Sifu finds Yang and takes him in, and raises him (as does MC’s mother, Simou). It’s kinda like a Shang-Chi scenario: Sifu teaches Yang more of the fighting stuff while Simou teaches him the calmer things, like tai chi and qi gong.

I imagine he would’ve met Sean early on, and the two become fast friends in a “we’re both awkward, lonely runts who have trouble making friends” sort of way XD As a child, Sean wanted strength to defeat bullies, which inadvertently led to him defending those who are “weak” (which gets twisted as he gets older, as we see in the game). Sean defends Yang, and Yang looks out for him, and they become an inseparable duo!

When Yang falls in love and marries his wife, I think Sean would feel kinda jealous because he still struggles with his own love life; but more than that, Yang is his best friend, so he’s worried about them drifting apart. But even bigger is MC being born! Since Yang had a lack of affection/security as a kid (and was later taught by the affectionate Simou), he immediately “clicks” with MC and dives into taking care of her as a big brother figure. To him, the title is more than just being a fellow Kung-Fu student. He wants to be like an actual brother to MC and make sure she never feels abandoned or unloved by anyone. I think, next to Sifu and Simou, he develops the strongest emotional bond with MC out of everyone.

I also headcanon MC’s name is Yin, hence the connection between her and Yang XD But that’s a whole other ramble of headcanons 😆

I should also mention that I imagine Simou (MC's mother) dies when MC is still a baby, which adds to Yang's trauma of losing loved ones to illness. Thus, he's always hypervigilant whenever MC gets sick 😢

Anyways, MC is closest with Yang while growing up, and she’s his favourite student when it comes to Kung-Fu. I think MC would’ve been scared of Sean at first; he doesn’t like kids or hanging around them, but Yang says she can trust Sean. So, in order to push them together, I put MC and Sean through a Big Event that helped shift their impressions of each other, which led to their developing bond 😂 But I think part of what pushes MC to spend more time with Sean is that Yang gets busy with his own family, his wife and new daughter, etc.

With Sean and MC, I’d call it a sunshine-grumpy dynamic? Sean doesn’t like kids, but he does grow to love MC as his sister. With his life being full of chaos, danger, and unstable relationships, she’s the only one with feelings that remain constant. And in MC’s pov, Sean is someone who protects her and keeps her safe no matter how many dangerous situations they might accidentally get into (because Sean’s a fighter in the illegal fight club XD). I think MC also helps Sean feel like he’s still needed, y’know? She depends on him when Yang isn’t around, and he wants to do the right thing, but he feels like he can’t be a good enough brother, so there’s a whole bunch of angst to swim through there 😂

And those are the basics of what I have for Yang, MC, and Sean! I could undoubtedly go into paragraphs upon paragraphs about each of them, and detail all my thoughts about their backstory and how it leads up to / affects their dynamics in the game, but I think I should stop here since this is getting pretty long loll But I’d definitely love to chat about some other headcanons – I got some feels about Sifu, Sean’s father, and Jinfeng, for example 👀 And how MC’s parents meet, and all that XD

Thank you so much for sending me your ask, anon! And if you read this far, thanks again!! 😁 I hope you enjoyed reading my thoughts as much as I enjoyed writing them! 💗💗

#asks #anon asks #sifu #sifu game #fanfiction #my fanfiction #writing #my writing

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rootsmachine · 4 years

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like atonement for a bygone sin

like atonement for a bygone sin meg x cas, 2777 words, idk what ratings are [ao3]

You only meet Castiel once before they throw you into a ring of holy fire. It’s eighty-six years after your first return topside, and you’re in a besieged city, somewhere in what would eventually be Iran. It’s an easy place to take souls, Azazel tells you. Desperate people will agree to anything. He looks at you, and grins in a way that reaches only his mouth.

“You did, after all,” and scratches his fingernails down your cheek.

The angels come to the city after two months of siege, with flaming swords, and an insistence on justice, but you know it’s because their champion is the disgraced leader of the city. Azazel had said so, something about him being a true vessel for one of the archangels, before warning you to stay away.

“Not our fight, daughter,” and his words echo in your head as you watch Castiel plunge their sword into the heart of one of the demons who tortured you before you clawed out of your cage and picked up a knife. Castiel is wearing the body of a young woman, her hair cropped short against her head. You won’t have to take bodies for another hundred years -- humans have a harder time believing in the holiness of angels when they reveal their true forms, but your shape just feeds into the whole fear thing.

You manage to escape through a hole in the angel’s defense, and crawl, half burned, back to Hell. Azazel gives you a pretty, curved knife and lets you practice on some poor, begging thing that used to be human. You close your eyes, and can only see Castiel, her blade shining in the sunlight.

Azazel came to you in a dream, when you were still just a girl. You were still just a girl, really, when you gave over your soul in exchange for your deepest wish, to shed the body that would condemn you to being a wife and a mother. The ten years you spend as Luke are exhilarating and wonderful and you try to escape death through boarding a ship back to the old country. It doesn’t work -- the hellhounds tear you apart somewhere in the middle of the Atlantic, and the body you lived in for a decade is torn to shreds to reveal the girl at the center.

You’re furious when you arrive in hell, too furious for the torture to do anything except make you angrier. You like it when they rip her apart, break her down to bones and blood and muscles and nothing anyone could ever recognize as belonging to you. Azazel watches with the closest you’ve seen to true happiness in his eyes, and he takes you down himself.

“My daughter,” he says, as he snaps your bones back together, “I have wonderful plans for you.”

In retrospect, you should have stayed in Hell with your knife, carving up people stupid enough, or desperate enough to sell themselves away, and then doubly stupid to not become … whatever you are.

If you had, you wouldn’t have met the Winchesters, and you wouldn’t have been failed by Azazel and then Lucifer, and you wouldn’t have slowly felt the anger that tethered you to whatever existence you kept begin to fade away.

You lie to them, and tell them it happened when Castiel kissed you inside Crowley’s prison, that something of their grace or their holiness made you itch inside and question all your loyalties, but really -- you’re not loyal to anyone but yourself, and whatever keeps your stolen body breathing for another day.

You don’t know her name, and you don’t care to. She was almost dead in an alley when you found her, and she lets you in, makes you promise you’ll kill whoever did this to her. She dies before you can, but you finish the job anyways.

You tell Castiel, much later, that you lose your grip on your fury when you kill the man who did this to the body that’s only yours now. You’ve never been good at reading emotions beyond pleasure and fear, but you think Castiel looks at you with something completely foreign to both.

It’s almost funny -- you let yourself die for the Winchesters, and for saving the world, and mostly for Castiel. In your almost four hundred years of existence, nothing hurts as much as the angel blade in your stomach. It burns, burns whatever essence of yourself you have away until it’s just your poor dead girl’s empty body and then it’s just blackness, and you are finally dead or gone or just absolutely nothing.

Until you wake up, in a body that should be too broken to move. But it’s not, and you curl your fingers, push yourself up until you’re slumped against the wall of the warehouse you thought you would rot in. Usually, the bodies you take feel too tight, too small, like you’re wearing someone else’s clothing, but her body fits, feels like your own bodies did so many, many years ago.

You start walking. Her body is stiff, and her joints crack and she’s hungry, you slowly realize with horror. You haven’t been hungry since the days before the hellhounds tore you to pieces, haven’t felt the way a body aches since you were human. Crowley’s warehouse is what feels like miles from the nearest town, and her body can barely make it.

Your body, you suppose, and you punch a sign by the side of the road as hard as you can, over and over and over until your skin bleeds and there is nothing you can do about it.

The last place you remember is the awful cabin the Winchesters lived in, and you hitchhike all the way to Sioux Falls, ignoring the body’s exhaustion and hunger until you can’t anymore.

The cabin is abandoned when you get there, which of course it is. There’s nothing that even tells you that Sam or Dean or Castiel have been here in the last few months. You suddenly realize you have no idea how long you’ve been gone, and if any of them are even still alive. You don’t trust the Winchesters to stay dead, the fucking cockroaches that they are, but maybe, finally it’s stuck.

There’s an old burner phone abandoned in a mostly empty kitchen drawer, and you charge it, hoping it will give you some kind of answer. All it tells you, as the screen feebly blinks on, is that you’ve been gone for only two months and four days, and that this phone was part of what appears to be an FBI scam. There’s only two contacts in it, an Agent Ragsdale and Special Agent Ehart, and you dial Agent Ragsdale, hoping someone will pick up and tell you what the fuck happened.

You’re sure the Winchesters are behind this, behind your imprisonment in this dead girl’s body, maybe to trap you or get more information about Hell out of you, or maybe just to bring you back and kill you again.

No one picks up, and you hear Sam’s voice on the other end, explaining you’ve reached Agent Ragsdale and to please leave a message after the tone. The inbox is full, and you throw the phone across the room.

All there is in the cabin is a six pack of beer and a half-finished bottle of whiskey. As a demon, you could drink even Castiel under the table, but this stupid body must have been a Mormon or a complete loser, because you’re drunk on the whiskey alone. Everything is spinning, and you hate whoever brought you back, whoever forced you into this weak, nothing body, whoever made it so you dedicated your whole self to a mission, only to make your sacrifice worthless.

Drunk, you get on your knees, and curse the Winchesters, and beg for someone, anyone, to tell you what the fuck is happening. You pass out there, on the floor, and would be humiliated in the morning, except no one comes. No one, it seems, is listening.

Seven days after you rise from the not-quite-dead, someone knocks on the door. No one you know knocks, so you almost don’t open the door, sure it’s some rural Jehovah’s Witness-type trying to get you to accept God into your heart.

They knock again, and then, “Meg?”

The voice is familiar in the way that this body has become -- like something that is yours.

You open the door; Castiel is standing outside, looking like he was in some kind of car accident, covered in blood.

“I heard your prayer,” he says, and you can only stare. “May I enter?”

“I didn’t pray for you,” you say, and let him in anyways. “I didn’t even pray.”

Castiel looks at you through the blue eyes of his vessel, and just shrugs. “I heard you, Meg,” and he opens the mostly-empty freezer to take out your last microwave dinner. “May I have this?”

“I didn’t think angels had to eat,” you say instead of answering. Castiel looks sad in a way you hate, and puts the whole tray of lasagna in the microwave, watches it spin around like it’s the only thing left to live for.

“They don’t, I’m not … ” he trails off, takes out your lasagna and sticks the fork into the half frozen pasta, chews, and swallows. He glances around the room, frowning slightly when he sees the still-somehow-intact devil’s trap on the floor inside the door. “Did you break in?”

You laugh, and walk towards the devil’s trap, walk through it a couple times. “Doesn’t work anymore, Clarence,” and he frowns more when you call him that.

“What did those cockroaches do? I was dead and suddenly I’m not , but I’m not me anymore. I’m whoever she was,” and you pinch at your body’s cheek. “She’s hungry all the time, and if she doesn’t sleep everything hurts, and the other day I had half a bottle of whiskey and she threw up. I swear to God, when I get my hands on them, I’m going to …”

“They sealed Hell,” Castiel says, “and I … I destroyed Heaven.” He looks at you with his stupid, sad eyes, and says “I destroyed paradise.”

“Castiel, honey,” you say, and he glares at you. “You’re making a habit out of that, aren’t you?”

He doesn’t speak to you for a few days, but he also doesn’t leave. He eats all of your food, and then finishes what Sam and Dean had left before they abandoned the cabin, which is mostly beef jerky and a jar of marshmallow fluff that your body hates. You mostly drink, and smoke a pack of cigarettes you find in the bottom of a suitcase. This kind of stuff can probably kill you now, you realize, but you don’t really care enough to stop.

You wonder, sometimes, if Castiel remembers the conversation you had as he sewed you together, the first hands you had felt in what seemed like millenia at that point that weren’t trying to kill you. He was gentle in a way you knew you didn’t deserve.

He doesn’t mention it, not once, and neither do you. You flirt shamelessly with Castiel, mostly because it’s amusing to watch him struggle to respond, but partly because you miss the way everything used to be simpler. You knew how to talk, and who to follow, and exactly which buttons to push, and watching Castiel blush and try to reply in his stupid Old Testement speech to whatever innuendo you’ve offered him this time makes you feel a little like who you used to be.

You know Castiel is in touch with the Winchesters, know that they call him sometimes to make sure he isn’t dead yet. He doesn’t tell them you’re with him, that he’s learned how to cook food you don’t hate, and that last week you woke up in the middle of the night and he was there next to you, his brown knit with worry even in his sleep.

Which is why, you suppose, when they finally show up at the cabin, Dean has a knife at your throat before you can react in your stupid, slow body.

“I thought we finally killed you,” he spits, and digs the knife into the soft skin under your jawbone, drawing a thin line of blood to the surface. Castiel watches you like he’s watching a particularly interesting soap opera, slowly eating the peanut butter and jelly sandwich you had made him.

“Call off your guard dog, Clarence,” you manage to get out, and you can feel Dean loosen his grip on your wrist. Castiel finishes his sandwich, and puts the plate in the sink, before turning to Dean and saying, “You can let her go, Dean,” his voice as calm and even as ever.

He stupidly looks between you and Cas, and reluctantly lets you go. The place where he cuts you hurts, and you press your fingers to it. You stomp to the kitchen, and grab a dish towel, holding it against your neck. You make sure to walk right through the devil’s trap, and Sam looks at you hard, like he doesn’t know what you are anymore.

“What are you doing with her?” Dean says to Castiel, who has taken the dish towel from your hands, and silently handed you a band-aid from the ancient first aid kit you had found in the bathroom, used to angrily patch Castiel up when he cut his own skin open to test if he was really human.

He shrugs, and says, “I don’t mind her company,” which is probably the nicest thing he’s ever said to you.

Dean turns to you, and you can tell he’s angry. “What about the girl whose body you’re wearing? What does she think about your little arrangement?”

“She’s dead,” you say shortly, “It’s just me in here.”

Dean opens his mouth to protest, and you cut him off, throwing a dish towel in his face. If you were still yourself, he would be gasping in pain, pinned up against the wall by now. Your fingers twitch just thinking about it.

“She’s been dead since I took the body,” Dean looks at Castiel, and then at Sam, both of whom nod at him.

“Ruby did that,” Sam says quietly, like he’s trying to remind Dean that maybe you might not be lying. He looks bad, you realize, like he’s two days away from dropping dead. Castiel told you how he closed Hell, how he almost tore himself apart doing it. It’s probably Sam who brought you back, Cas said, and you’re sure it was an accident. You’re not sure how he didn’t die -- everything you ever knew about the rituals of closing Hell ensured the final sacrifice would be whoever decided to undergo the trials.

It’s unnerving to have him sitting on your couch, drinking a cup of coffee Castiel made him in the mug you use every morning. You always preferred his silent self-hatred to his brother’s self-righteousness, and you know what it feels like to be Sam Winchester, or at least you knew what it was like to be him once.

Three days after the Winchesters leave, you drive to Sioux Falls with Castiel. Sam had slipped you the name of a tattoo artist, and you realized with fury that some other demon could take over your body now, or Castiel’s body. It’s not the body you would have chosen forever, but you feel protective over this girl in a way that makes you feel sick. You’ve made her do enough for a lifetime, and you have no desire to share her too-small frame with anyone else.

You get the stupid tattoo on your wrist, and it doesn’t hurt at all.

Castiel sleeps in your bed now. You barely sleep, mostly just sit in the open window and smoke. He hates it when you smoke, something about this being your last body ever, so you don’t do it in front of him, not anymore.

It had taken him three months to kiss you, and he doesn’t taste like grace anymore. You told him that, and he looked so heartbroken you kissed him again, pushed him to the bed, and tried to show him how much you didn’t care.

You’ve never been good at emotion, or at feeling things, even your first time around as a human, but the way Castiel looks up at you, you know he knows.

He tells you he loves you, like he loves all of God’s creations, and you tell him you would love him if you could.

Somehow, it works.

#meg masters #meg x cas #supernatural #castiel #now that ive admitted to the supernatural thing #i'm posting this here bc it bothers me when i dont have a backup of my fic online somewhere #anyways Yes i wrote supernatural fic and yes i probably deserve to like burn at the stake for this #but i dont care im loving this thriving enjoying life for the first time in months #i also stand by my 8th grade decision of loving meg masters #turns out i love her AND im gay AnD shes hot #turns out we can have All Three #cw: supernatural #keeping my supernatural tag for this blog as cw: supernatural bc that is insanely funny to me #fic*

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another-stark-sub · 3 years

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“Are you in love with him?” - Tony Stark Imagine

Notes: I wrote and editted this in two hours instead of going over my notes. Was gonna be spicy fluffy but it just turned into fluffy, and one of the lines/paragraphs (smth like that i dont remember how long that segment was) is based on/inspired by a fanfic on ao3 I bookmarked. I think it’s debt-free, but I could be wrong. Anyway, I hope you enjoy, and I’m so sorry im not on here more oftennnnn

- - -

“Of course I am. He’s Tony Stark.” You sighed, a weight finally lifted off your chest. “Who isn’t in love with him?”

Bruce blinked a few times, the confusion evident on his face. “Then, why don’t you tell him?”

You scoffed. These geniuses think they know everything, but they couldn’t see what was glaringly obvious to you. “He’s Tony Stark.”

The perplexed expression didn’t disappear from your friend’s expression. So, you explained further, “It’s already a privilege, beyond that really, to be talking to you, to any Avenger. To work with any of you is an honor, and to be friends with you” -you laughed- “it shouldn’t even be possible for someone like me.”

“Don’t say that. You’re amazing, too.”

You tried to find any tick, any clue that he was lying. But Bruce seemed to really believe this. “I know I’m amazing.” You shrugged. “I’m great. I love and I care deeply, and I have a stable job. I have a place for myself, and I take care of myself.” You clicked your tongue. “However, you all, all you Avengers… Forget out of my league, more like off planet.

“And Tony? He said it himself. Genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist. Add superhero, figurehead, public figure, ex-CEO, and savior of the universe. Bruce, I have confidence in myself, but Tony is something else entirely. No one is worthy of him or his affections unless they’re a god or another Avenger.”

It was hard to keep up with the statistical analysis you were trying to run. The literal one on your hologram and the one keeping your view of Tony in check. So, defeated, you sighed and leaned back in your chair.

Bruce closed his own work and stood across the lab bench. “Weirdly enough, I’m sure none of us Avengers think that way.” After a few taps of his pen against his palm, he added, “Aren’t there fans making posts about you, too? Tony showed me the, uh, Instagram videos.”

You laughed. “Fan edits don’t make an Avenger. Saving the world does.”

He shrugged. “You help us save the world.”

“From inside Avengers Tower on a computer.” You took a deep breath. “Look, Bruce, I appreciate what you’re trying to do. But, I’m not telling him.” You shrugged and brought your statistical analysis back up.

You knew your own worth. You were worthy of an amazing partner and person. Tony Stark, though, was easy beyond that. You had accepted it soon after you realized your own feelings, and while they haven’t dwindled, you knew it was for the best.

~ - ~

Tony had never resorted to this before. It was never a question of his ability to code. In the past, it was because he didn’t need a program or an AI to do it for him. He could always tell if someone was into him. He knew when Pepper was into him. The moment Rhodey gazed at him back in their MIT days. Every single reporter and heiress and model he slept with, he knew when their thoughts turned sexual or romantic.

You, though. With you, he couldn’t fucking tell, and he knew it was because of his own feelings. Tony felt intensely for people before. Pepper, Rhodey, that one reporter all those years ago. However, with you, it wasn’t just that fluttery feeling in his gut or the immediate smile he can’t seem to stop when he sees you. It was the comfort he felt when he heard your voice or the softness he could feel in his heart when he saw a picture of you.

It was like his entire life was full of panic, never resting, never stopping. But when you entered his life with a gentle smile and a quick wit, it felt like he could finally breathe.

It was addicting.

“Sir, I have the calculations.”

“Hit me.”

“Speech diagnostics of you and of Ms. (Y/l/n) are similar. Whenever you speak of her, 79.4% is positive and 18.8% is neutral. Ms. (Y/l/n) has 78.9% positive and 17.2% neutral dialogue regarding you. When she speaks of you, her heartrate increases by 4.6%, and similarly, yours increases by 4.1%. When speaking to each other, heartrate initially increases by 7%.”

Tony nodded. “How does this compare to other Avengers? I gush about Banner like a teenager.”

“Well, sir, while you and Ms. (Y/l/n) have high positive dialogue about other Avengers, all of them have at least a 10% decrease compared to each other. And heartrate varies depending on the topic of conversation.”

Tony snapped his fingers. “Am I excluding all non-super friends? Include any agents, co-workers. Pep isn’t an Avenger after all.”

Friday took two seconds and responded. “You and Ms. (Y/l/n) have a significant difference in speech diagnostics when talking about or to each other compared to any other Avenger, co-worker, and friend.”

When Tony remained quiet, Friday added, “Do you want me to repeat the results?”

“You don’t need to, Friday.”

“But you’re not doing anything with the new information. Would you like me to save these findings?”

“Friday,” Tony warned.

There was silence as the love-wrecked scientist pressed his fist between his brows. Data and cold hard facts said yes, but was it right?

“Sir?”

“Yes, Fri?”

“Would you like me to play examples for you?”

He blinked. “Examples?”

“Yes. Of you and her talking about each other positively.”

It was an invasion of privacy. Tony shouldn’t.

“Play examples.”

Before his rational mind could tell Friday no.

“Are you in love with him?”

Tony’s eyes widened. This was too private. It might not even be about him.”Friday-”

“Of course I am.”

“-stop playback.”

“He’s Tony Sta-”

“Playback stopped.”

Tony scrambled. “What? No, wait, go back. Play it.” Screw rational. You knew he was a narcissist. You wouldn’t expect him to hear that and stop.

“He’s Tony Stark. Who isn’t in love with him?”

“Then, why don’t you tell him?”

“... He’s Tony Stark.”

Tony started to fiddle with something on his desk. “What does that mean?”

Friday answered, “Dr. Banner asked her if she loved you, and she said yes. This means that she’s in love with you.”

Why did he program Friday like this? “I know that. I mean, those two lines. Why does me being Tony Stark stop her from saying something?” Was it the attention? Did you want some sort of normal life away from cameras and international gossip? Maybe it was the Avenging. Having a partner who was always out risking death wasn’t ideal.

Sure, you could be in love with him. But you couldn’t be with him.

“Maybe you should ask her.”

There were celebrities who were able to live normal lives. Some paid to have prosthetics for going outside of moved to a remote country to get out of the spotlight. He thrived off attention, but he could give that up. Avenging, he couldn’t give that up, but maybe he could cut back. Take a mission a month instead of one a week. Or maybe take more digital missions. He wasn’t just Iron Man after all. He was a genius, could hack into the Pentagon if he really wanted to.

“Yeah,” he said. “Maybe I could talk to her.”

~ - ~

The moment you put your bag down on your lab table, Tony said, “You’re gonna be mad.”

You narrowed your brows. “What did you do?” You pressed your palm to your chest. “Oh my god, Peter overwrote my data, didn’t he? Ugh, I know he said he’s great at managing holograms, but really, Tone, you should’ve given him a tutorial before giving him access.” You brought up your holograms to check your data and analysis.

“That’s not it.” Tony stood next to you as you looked through your files. “I did something that invaded your privacy.”

You tilted your head. Closing the holograms, you took a deep breath and slowly asked, “How?”

Tony flashed an embarrassed grin before sighing. “You’re gonna be shocked, too, so prepare yourself.”

You did not know where this was going at all. What horrible thing could Tony have done? Steeling yourself, you took a deep breath and nodded at him to continue.

Tony cleared his throat. “Usually, I can tell when someone has feelings for me. People are obvious about it, but you? You aren’t. So, I had Friday do some analysis on our speech patterns. Me, being in love with you, was one of my controls. You and your dialogue regarding me was the main variable.

“Long story short, I accessed some audio of you and Bruce talking, and you said that you loved me but could never tell me.” He glanced at you. “So that’s why I need to apologize.”

Your expression didn’t change. No, that wasn’t it. You, at first, looked confused. Now, there was just nothing. No expression. No wrinkled brow in anger of flushed cheeks in embarrassment. Nothing.

Tony blinked. “You can shout at me now. If you were confused about when to shout at me.”

You licked your lips before taking a deep breath. “Ok, that was a lot.” You pursed your lips then opened it. But, you couldn’t really think of anything to say. You didn’t even know how to feel. “So you know that I” -you pointed at yourself and then at him- “and that I didn’t wanna tell you.” You shook your head. “Wait, do you know why I didn’t want to tell you?”

A broken scoff left Tony’s lips. “Yeah. I’m a mess.”

It was your turn to scoff. “Wait, you’re a mess? That’s why you think I don’t want to tell you?”

“Among other reasons?”

Other reasons?

You crossed your arms. “Ok, what other reasons?”

Tony looked offended. Still, he listed, “I’m surrounded by cameras, and everyone wants some privacy. Can’t get it if you’re with me. Then, there’s the Iron Man of it all. I went into a wormhole with a nuke. That was also all over the news. Then, there’s the whole daddy issues thing. I’m working on it, but it takes a while-”

He rambled on and on, listing reason after reason, and with each one, you felt tears well up in your eyes. It was a weird mix of heartbreaking, confusing, and enraging. The emotions built up slowly with each word that left his mouth, overwhelming you to the point that you couldn’t even say how it happened.

But, as Tony paced and talked so horribly about himself, you somehow ended up in front of him with your hands on his cheeks.

You only realized it when Tony stopped talking and when his breath touched your lips. “What?” he asked.

You didn’t answer. You kissed him instead.

It was a hard press of your lips against his. It was short, and it wasn’t much.

But by the way Tony gripped the back of your neck and pulled you back for another kiss, you’d think it was his first kiss. You knew it wasn’t. Not just because you knew he had kissed all sorts of people before you, but because he somehow knew how to make you gasp and melt into him.

While one hand kept you steady, the other trailed down your back and pulled you closer to him. His lips moved fluidly against yours, pushing and pulling, and everytime he moved back, you chased his lips to continue the kiss, because the softness, the passion, the fact it was finally happening, was all too good. You didn’t want it to stop.

Your hands started to move. For someone so rich, his t-shirt was rough when you twisted it between your fingers and pulled it to you. Slowly, you trailed your fingers along the side of his neck. You rubbed your thumb along his pulse point, a reminder that this was indeed real. You were kissing Tony Stark, and- He was pulling away again.

Desperate, you leaned forward, reached around to hold onto his shoulder, and kissed the side of his neck.

He let out a breathy laugh, and before you could suck on his skin, his stubble scratched your cheek.

You looked up at him and giggled when his nose bumped into yours. When your giggles turned into a smile, he kissed you again, a soft and short kiss, before leaning his forehead against yours.

His thumbs rubbed circles into your waist as you lightly scratched the back of his neck. He didn’t say anything. In fact, he seemed busy gazing at you.

“Speechless, Stark?” you teased.

He laughed. For a few seconds, he just gazed at you, seeming to prove your point. Tony’s hand began to wander, from stroking your cheek to pushing back your hair. “More confused.”

Remembering why you interrupted him, you brought your hands to his cheeks again and held him there so he couldn’t look away from you. “You are amazing, Tony. That’s the reason I didn’t want to tell you.” You shrugged. “You’re too good for me.”

His fidgeting stopped. “Well, that’s not true.”

“Tony, you’re an Avenger.”

“Technically, you are also an Avenger.”

“You’re a genius.”

“Who can’t cook scrambled eggs.”

“You literally saved the universe.”

“After producing weapons of mass destruction for decades.”

You glared at him.

He glared back. Then, he fought back. “I don’t plan on retiring.”

“Wouldn’t want you to.”

“I have severe PTSD, anxiety, maybe ADHD, all mixed with trauma galore.”

“And I will learn to help you.”

“I couldn’t give you a normal life.”

“I’d rather have you anyway.”

He opened his mouth, but you instead told him, “I’d rather have you than anything. As long as, well, for as long as you’ll have me.”

He raised his eyebrow. “You sure about that?”

“Positive.”

Tony shook his head with a smile. “Cause, I’d rather have you for, well, how does til you get tired of me sound?”

You laughed. “Won’t happen. But, sure.” You kissed him again.You would’ve kept going, but there was something to settle first. “By the way, Tony?”

“Yeah?”

“Is Friday recording right now?”

“Friday records everything. It’s in the contract.”

Friday added, “I record everything that happens in the tower.”

“Ok.” You could work with that. “I’ll forgive you for the invasion of privacy.”

Tony beamed, and you couldn’t help your own smile when he did. Still, you continued, “On one condition.” Your own smile turned devious. “I want evidence that Star Spangled Banner took my ice cream.”

Tony burst out laughing. He kissed you again, a deep kiss, and when he was done, he mumbled, “God, I love you,” against your lips.

#tony stark x reader #tony stark imagine #tony stark oneshot #tony stark #mcu x reader #mcu imagine #mcu oneshot #tony stark fluff #im so sorry im not on here oftennnnnnnnnnnn #dentla schools too busy and i dont wike it #thats not true i do like it its just busy and stressful and doesnt give me time to write #and smut takes me longer to write than fluff #so i can only write fluff rnnnnnn #anyway i miss you all #love you all #hope the universe treats you welllll

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roguestarsailor · 3 years

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You know what since we’re still in quarantine and i have nothing else better to do, i need to obsess over ACOTAR. I don't like a court of frost and starlight. For the longest time I couldn't figure out why I didn't like it. I aggressively read the book in maybe a day and I closed it feeling frustrated and annoyed. My version had A Court of Silver Flames preview so that definitely contributed to my annoyance greatly.

It's because it felt too perfect. Everything that had happened -- after the entire war was fought and won, they just go back to their normal lives? Yes there were hiccups and yes there were still aspects that made every IC character feel like their problems aren’t solved yet...but it didnt feel right. yes i enjoyed the snowball fight between the bat boys, feyre + rhys sexy time, and those little comfort moments too, the slice of life type things and seeing feyre accomplishing her goals and how hopeful the future seems BUT its too fast. the good parts of the book did not offset the bad parts of it.

Feyre literally accomplished pretty much every single goal she made back in ACOMAF just like that?? within a span of what a few months? a year?? She really came back from an entire war -- probably the first war of many since she's immortal and just like that, after her 21st birthday: she gets a whole entire estate, wants to start poppin babies, opens her art studio and starts teaching kids and then acting like she can rule an entire court?? the timeline is sooo short esp since its been brought up over and over again how everyone is literally 500 years old and have a super “messy” history and their changes seems to come super dupe slowly. but feyre, who has only lived 0.000000002% of her fae life, is out here thriving just fine???

the war devastated thousands of illyrian soldiers where its changing the politics of the illyrains and the faes, all of whom feyre has responsibilities over too as high lady. the mortal queens are still at large who left the humans on prythian to die which is why feyre was willing to go to war in the first place! what about the rest of hybern and their land and residents?? they wanted to enslave humans for social and economical reasons! then what about integrating humans w deep hatred and fear with deeply prejudice fae??? there’s also spring and summer court who are literally in ruins. thats literally so much. so idk how feyre is just chillin???? she gonna let rhys do all the hard work???

like feyre sit down. u should not be having a baby. esp since it took u literally a 700 pages to heal from those 3 months UTM. ur telling me shes gonna whole heartedly bring in a newborn in a war devastated world, with civil unrest (illyrains, other courts), with the messiness of human and fae integration, with trauma u and rhys will have to continue to overcome esp after THIS war??? even helping ur sisters w their traumas??

this is a personal opinion on this subject (and maybe my thoughts will change on this later on; opened to other thoughts) but when i read the part about how that weaver/seamstress artist who made that dark quilt that feyre loved talked about how her mate of 300 years didn’t come back from the war and her biggest regret was that she didnt have a kid to remember him by i just thought ur kid isn’t some sort of memorabilia. don’t have a kid to keep the memory of ur mate alive; have a kid cuz u want a kid purely for the sake of having a kid. ur memories and photos and shit will keep their memory alive but its not having a kid. some primitive need to keep the genes alive maybe?? but the way it was phrased and then in turn how feyre was like oh i need a baby pronto cuz rhys might die in the next war and regret not having a kid with him didn’t sit right with me. also the other couple were together for +300 years and have a rich life together, while shes been with rhys for literally two years THATS NOTHING IN FAE YEARS. thats still the honeymoon phase and also ur problems arent even close to being over!!!

everyone was shitty to nesta. in ACOMAF, we saw how much the IC went through and still did all they could to help feyre. what made them not think nesta deserve the same welcome? nesta is mean as a defense but did no one try to figure out what would help (amren got close but shes so under developed)??? feyre knows nesta feels too much and yet she continued to be shitty. continued to flaunt her wealth, her status, her familiarity/borderline know-it-all attitude about fae/night court, her ~estate~. forcing nest to the solstice party when nesta was literally like i dont belong, im looking at everyone through a window type of thing; the fire cracking triggering her, etc. what kind of power play was that when she made nesta come to her estate, where nesta could SEE how ~homey~ and how suscessful feyre is and fully see all the lovely paintings of everyone feyre loves that explicitly exclude her to tell her to fuck off to a war camp?? bro???? cas was a dick too and elaine was rude. i think a lot of his actions were meant to make her angry since anger keeps u fighting (as was the method of rhys for feyre in ACOMAF) but what he said was stupidly shitty and i demand that he apologize properly. elaine could have done more to help her sister but whatever. mor was definitely an ass too (and im upset for how little her character growth is).

Lucein. that man can’t catch a break tbh. im happy that hes w the band of exiles cuz he is whole heartedly accepted there. feyre was definitely an asshole to him even tho he helped as much as he could throughout the books. he tries so hard w elaine as well and it did hit my heart a bit when she was like gloves to work in my garden?? no ?? i use my bare hands see oNly aZiReL sEeS mE fOr WhO i Am. and at the same feyre is like flaunting her mate status to lucein which is mean as shit. its like this man can’t find love in prythain. then tamlin sending him his box of his things??? thats for sure brutral. tam was literally his partner through it all; savior of sorts even. no love from IC, no love from elaine, no love from feyre, no love from tamlin, no love from autumn court rejected everywhere! also HIS TRUE FATHER?? HEllo???

then on tamlin. i pity the guy! was i suppose to feel that way??? it felt like he is allowed to get a redemption arc and maybe i’ll even root for a redemption arc??? i was absolutely excited for freysand in ACOMAF but after ACOFAS, im like tamlin is....not completely bad??? his relationship w feyre was bad and the controlling parts were very much a no-no. i dont truly understand the dynamics of an abusive relationship but i can understand that it can be insidious and its the little things that hurt the victim. and i felt feyre through ACOMAF and rooted for her to escape her abuser! but then it felt like i dont think he was doing any of those things out of malice. ill say tamlin is a bad leader and doesn’t know how to run a court outside of what he sees his father do. his understanding on everything is based on the traditions of the past which i think fueled most of the things he did i.e. not telling feyre she was in danger since maybe his mom didn’t do those war planning things. ACOTAR showed how he truly cared/loved and took good care of feyre and her family. he even talked about how he didn’t believe in the enslavement of humans! i think that tam wanted to preserve what he thought was the good (aka feyre + her love of painting) and get back a sense of control that he and his entire court lost while chained to amarantha. but at the same time, i think he truly thought feyre wasn’t safe. he knows rhys can crush minds and knows feyre can’t read/write so when he got that letter telling him shes safe of course hes gonna flip shit and made a deal w the devil (although those temper outbursts were DEFINITIVELY not ok!!!). he also didn’t listen and has sense of he knows best when feyre was not the type of person. but feyre destroyed his entire court. he lost all his sentries who literally went out to die for him during amarantha’s reign. he lost lucien too; his trusted right hand man. his people were cursed for 50 years and then continued to suffer UTM and was in the process of rebuilding too! but just seeing spring court, WHO BORDERS THE HUMANS, be in ruins where his subjects left him, his people left him and hes all alone in the manson?? that was sooo sad. so im like why does what feyre did not feel satisfactory????? im mad that it didn’t feel right??? maybe there wasn’t a point where feyre talked to tamlin -- like really talked to him esp w her new found voice and power, etc. anyways, i dont hate tamlin and was like oh shit i think feyre fucked up a bit there.

rhys is a dick to nesta. which made me think, if feyre wasn’t his mate would he extend the same love and care to her??? i loved how he tried so hard to make sure feyre was ok. made sure she wasn’t breaking! all of it! but for nesta, he had the audacity to use his high lord voice and be an ass overall. even tho he can see how cas is fucken in love??? even just how he talks to cass feels off too.

i’ll even go as far as to say because of how terrible ACOFAS was, it created this intense divide within the fandom. i remember reading the first three books and was absolutely 1) rooting for freysand 2) curious about the sister relationship and how it will be mended 3) i definitely didn’t hate nesta nor did i hate elaine either -- but i was adament about them talking it out with feyre for those tough times 4) saw a more realistic and charming healing arc 5) was rooting for feyre to be a stronger voice and grow into herself 6) love the dynamic of the inner circle + feyre

but after ACOFAS, I have this intense need to defend nesta and was super mad at how she was treated after the war and in turn a deep dislike for elaine for both her lack of agency, lack of grit that made all the other characters interesting, and lack of care for her sisters (who showed how much they would risk for her). i dont hate rhys but i was extremely not happy with him and his attitude and behavior. feyre became more arrogant and was acting like how asshole rhysand would act. like her life is perfect now and i was not rooting for her anymore. freysand didn’t feel like they have complimenting qualities that made them interesting in the first place but rather they are merging to become the same person but in a bad way. that mind reading thing was cute in the beginning but it became insufferable since all thoughts were shared so seamlessly it made reading feel weird.

anyways those are my thoughts on ACOFAS. it was a 1/5 stars for me and im mad those events transpired. reading the other books made me excited to know what was gonna happen and i was truly ready to accept the characters as flawed and nuanced as they are. im not mad about character not liking each other but i am mad that everything felt off. ACOFAS just felt regressive in some parts and forced in other parts. i know not everything ends in a nice tied up bow but this book single handily ruined what i thought about these characters in the worse way possible. this book wasn’t suppose to wrap up all the problems that exists in the other books but it didn’t feel hopeful like i thought it would. it didn’t feel wrapped up and didn’t feel like i should be excited about the next books. theres so many missing pieces i feel that i think need explaining and at the same time, i think it introduced too many problems at once which made it feel like its jumping around everywhere. although im still excited for ACOSF because i love nesta, and nesta deserves so much better and i want to have hope that this bad ending will either make sense later on or it was just a blimp.

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all-things-mlqc · 4 years

Note

Boys reaction to MC who never have date before meeting them. Like, the boys as MC's first love.

My first HC on here and I was memeing half the time while writing it. Included what the boys would do after hearing this news as well because why not. I’m not a Lucien fan but lord have mercy on my soul, I couldn’t help making his romantic af. He is the ideal boyfriend/date minus the l i e s that come in the MS and I hate it. All the crossed out stuff is just commentary because I couldn’t help myself. Hope you enjoy~ Thank you for your ask <3

How the MLQC boys react to being MC’s first love below the cut~

Victor:

Follows with some snarky comment after he calls her “Dummy”.

Let’s be real here, if he doesn’t call her dummy immediately, then something is wrong. Reminds me of when we streamed the first episode of MLQC and we were all yelling “CALL US BAKA” the second Victor came on screen.

While he seems cool and collected on the outside, you can hear the computer shutdown sound play on the inside.

To him, this is a shocking confession.

Victor: I’m not surprised a dummy like you hasn’t been in a serious relationship before.

Victor, internally: How has she never been in a serious relationship before??

He’s not very good at expressing himself honestly through his words but he truly admires MCs hardworking nature.

He finds that very attractive in a woman and is surprised that other men in the line of business haven’t taken their shot with her yet. it’s because they can feel your death stare on the back of their heads, kind sir

One thing he struggles with is being himself. He tries to act like everything is in his control all the time.

Because of this, upon hearing MCs confession, he invites her to a fancy dinner at his penthouse insert Victor’s Dazzling Date because THATS ALL THAT MATTERS. Jkjk haha... unless...

He wants to impress her as much as possible even though he knows deep down that she doesn’t care about what a person has and rather how they are as a person

BUT ALAS. The stress be real for her first boyfriend.

He wants her to know she made a good decision without verbally telling her out of his own bitch mouth I love you, please call me baka so he goes over the top with their first date.

Basically pulls a Mr. Krabs when taking Mrs. Puff on a date. Just add shades to Mr. Krabs to represent Victor’s “I’m calm. I’m chill. I’m all good. We vibin out here.”

All MC wants from him is his honest and genuine thoughts. and a lifetime stock of pudding because good god a girl has chocolate needs

MC eventually figures out Victor’s intentions with all the gifts he rains on her because hE dOesNt nEeD tHeM he can’t give her anything more than a cup of pudding up front

MC knows this and accepts the secret gifts with a smile.

She sends a gift in return to his office the following day along with a thank you for the wonderful date.

Can you hear that? It’s the sound of Victor’s heart rate slowing to the average persons.

Kiro:

insert pikachu meme

This boy is mind blown.

“How have you never been in a relationship before??? That can’t be true!”

Kiro sees the good in everyone, so hearing that MC has never been in a relationship before him is

He gives her a bright smile and playfully hugs her from behind.

The two of them laugh together as he whispers genuinely in her ear,

“I promise to make you happy. You won’t regret it.”

He immediately drags her off to Loveland’s Amusement Park, where they spend the whole day together.

Rides, snacks, games, you name it, they did it all.

Kiro naturally spoils MC without putting much thought to it.

It’s like a reflex for him. It’s just who he is as a person. Always wants to share the happiness in the world with the people he cares about.

As for how anxious he is after hearing the news about being MC’s first love, he is screaming at a pitch only dogs can hear.

Almost 100% of the time he has a smile on his face and even convinces himself that he’s not worried about it.

But he is.

It only hits him when he thinks about another man taking MC away from him after seeing her talking with another guy.

MC will catch him without his carefree smile at times and eventually confronts him about it.

He shows her a wide smile and says there’s nothing to worry about.

L I E S. BABIE LEMME HOLD YOU I PROMISE YOU DONT NEED TO WORRY.

After a few attempts of trying to get Kiro to open up about it, he gives in and says he’s worried he’s not good enough for her HAHAHHA, GOOD ONE KIRO

MC, however, turns it around on him

MC: I’m afraid IM the one who isn’t good enough for you.

They both smile and embrace each other, knowing they’ll get through any little concerns like this.

Gavin:

He knows.

We’re talking about the boy who has been in love with MC since high school; Who has protected her behind the scenes ever since he laid eyes on her.

He would know if she had been in a previous or current relationship.

It only comes as a shock when she says she’s never been interested in anyone else romantically before. Lies. Have you seen the other suitors, MC. In a world where guys are that hot, you must’ve had at least 1 crush, c’mon sis.

Gavin respected her personal boundaries and never looked into her personal affairs so he had very little knowledge of her views on other guys.

He gets a little bit nervous, since he believes her standards must be high if she hasn’t been interested in anyone else before.

Does the full on soldier oath, bend the knee cliche which includes “I promise to always protect you” and “Nobody will ever be good enough for you”

Mc: Gavin no...

Gavin: NOBODY WILL EVER BE GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU.

Spoiler alert: You are waayyyyy too good for me, Gavin.

He doesn’t have too much anxiety over the thought of being MC’s first love though since he’s very good at staying true to himself and knows MC is one to admire that about others.

Gavin is a quiet guy in general. He’s more of an observer and watches MC to take note of what she enjoys.

When he sees her eyes shine bright after seeing a delicious dessert cafe, he offers to take her. He makes sure to express how he also wants to go since he knows she won’t accept unless he is interested as well.

Boy literally has no interests the moment he’s with MC. He is essentially that vine

Doesn’t even wait until the question is over and just “Absolutely. Let’s do it”

MC: But I haven’t even said anything yet...

He isn’t much different from how he is now. Has around the same amount of anxiety just from being in MCs presence.

Boy just wants to PROTECC and is always panicking on the inside but tries to remain calm.

He is very good at calming his anxiety though since he’s had so long to understand what MC values and knows she just loves people for themselves.

That’s all he needs.

Lucien:

His eyes widen slightly at MCs confession.

It’s nothing too mind blowing for him since he knows how refined MC is and how dedicated she is to her work.

It’s still surprising to him that nobody has tried to sweep her off her feet yet.

With how kind MC is, it would be hard for her to refuse a date with a gentleman.

Lucien gently presses a kiss to MCs hand upon hearing her confession.

Lucien: I am honored to be given the opportunity TO WOO to take such a beautiful lady out on a date~ AND MORE PLEASE

Lucien is the definition of a gentleman shhhh we aren’t speaking of current chapters in the main route Lucien. Cover your eyes. Pretend you do not see.

With little to no anxiety showing on his face after the reveal that he is MCs first love, he insists on taking her out to a nice restaurant the most classy and romantic 5 star restaurant Loveland City has to offer as a way to thank her for dealing with his bs (both his bullshit and black swan hahaha I’m so funny oml) being given the opportunity to treat her as a beautiful young lady should be treated.

He’s also more on the less anxious side of being MCs first love.

Lucien is a traditional man and does stuff by the book.

Because of this, he respects and likes the idea of being MCs first love.

He doesn’t go over the top yet isn’t cliche with dates and little actions.

He knows exactly what to say and when to say it. Though he may struggle with being openly honest about his own thoughts and feelings, he tries his best to express himself for MC. a lot of the time he just assumes talking to her about his personal affairs would bring her down.

This, however, gets better overtime as they continue to date.

They spend a lovely evening at dinner together and take a midnight stroll through the city oh god city stroll PTSD

He gently wraps his jacket around her bare shoulders with a soft smile as he thanks her once again for believing in him believing he is worthy of her

Bonus:

Shaw:

Shaw, smirking: Is that so?

Oohhhhh you know what that smirk does to me. DOWN BOY D O W N.

He’s surprised but his reaction is very mutual.

His internal thoughts are more on the line of “Hmm I’m her first boyfriend, aye?” and “OYA OYA”

He very likely most definitely places his hand on the wall beside her head and leans in closely to get a reaction from her as he growls,

Shaw: So that means you really like me, yeah? I’m making this way too hot gdi. Shaw stans please enjoy your food

MC looks up to see that same playful smirk resting on his face.

highkey don’t know how to respond because Im just “ok think of 3 things she would probably say and go from there” while my brain just computer error sound

MC: and what about yourself? I’m sure there are tons of girls throwing themselves at you yet you choose me.

He pulls away and places his hands in his pockets with a chuckle.

Shaw: I’ve had my fair share before.

iVe HaD mY fAiR sHarE bEfoRe MY ASS

I’m convinced he’s had one time things with girls purely for information or he isn’t the least bit interested in relationships because he thrives on stimulation and entertainment and nOboDy iS gOoD eNouGh plus he literally asks what people do on dates when taking mc out in his first date in game SO

Either way, this is a LIE. The man can’t relationship for the life of him so he has no RIGHTS to tease her.

Just let him believe or you can try to tease him about it in hopes of getting a little pouty face out of him.

Honestly, their first date would just be the first date we got in the game and nobody can convince me otherwise.

Shaw is a wild child and doesn’t care for romantic dates. at least that’s what he wants you to think

A little insight on his character: He’s very blunt and easily pushes people away all the while keeping them close enough to gather intel. He doesn’t get emotionally attached to anyone and makes sure it’s mutual on both ends. Personal relationships only drag him down, especially in his line of work. He prioritizes other things before relationships which makes him so damn FRUSTRATING BUT I SWEAR I WILL CRACK YOU OPEN LIKE A WALNUT JUST YOU WATCH ME.

With that being said, after actually being in a relationship with MC for a while and opening up about their personal lives more, Shaw can be very romantic. He may be awkward for a bit at first since he literally doesn’t know what a date is but he gets there eventually.

He’s still full of fun but is also very gentle and makes sure MC is enjoying herself.

I got sidetracked with the actual HC on this one but Shaw stans need food I NEED FOOD

#mlqc #mr. love queen's choice #mr. love #mlqc gavin #mlqc shaw #mlqc kiro #mlqc victor #mlqc lucien #i had to limit myself because i started writing A LOT #i also had the BRILLIANT idea #*not really brilliant*#of Lucien offering to walk MC home after their date #and MC just ‘that’s ok. Youve already done so much for me tonight’#Lucien: Our apartments are right next to each other mc #MC:#*hello darkness my old friend plays in the bg*#she just wanted to be polite and the fucking LOGIC FLEW OVER HER HEAD LIKE #logic? dont know em #ms. walks in front of cars every day #i really enjoyed shaws too just because i love his bitch ass #like being able to meme 24/7 is my dream and that is legit all he’s good for #the S A S S #we love a sassy bitch #and his date we got in the game is all i need to say about their date after mcs reveal #shaw: cool so what IS a date exactly?#mc: youre kidding right?#shaw: well i mean i know it’s for couples but wtf do we do #mc: shopping/dinner/a movie #shaw: *jerry squints* thats boring as hell. lets go do some illegal shit

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yamagucji · 3 years

Text

a series of thank you’s i’ve been meaning to give for a while now. please note i couldn’t get everyone bc im smol brained and im forgetful :(( also its vedy long so i added a readmore link but if it’s okay then i can remove it!

i would’ve preferred to go to your inboxes/dm’s but im scared t🤢umblrs going to glitch on me if i do it again a ha ha

@doublemoons

i remember you sent in my first ever request and i was SO happy like🥺 my account had no visibility on week 1 but then you somehow found my blog and since then you’ve been supporting me. i love the aesthetic of your blog and i always look forward to your rb’s because they so cute and insightful !! ik we haven’t talked much but i definitely perceive u as a gentle person here’s 1k hearts for you and you only <3

@insanityqueen

please i was *intense squealing* and *happy noises* when you said you wanted to be mutuals :’) im definitely uhhh way too immature for u but you still stick with all the caps and !!! i send you😭 you’re such an interesting, talented person. day 1 you got me HOOKED with your art and im gonna say this again,, i have never seen skin look soo s o f t painted. im really grateful for your company and all your cats and the hinata art you made me🥺 i am not still thirsting over it i swear and then you sent me pieces of your writing and i def expected hc’s but then BOOM🧍‍♀️ im so amazed by your writing. also you are vv pretty i hope you know that

@zephyrria

matching heart memes matching heart memes😾 i don’t talk to you as much but our main form of communication is literally exchanging heart memes w/o a word,,, if that isn’t true love idk what is :// anyway i love our little convos so much it always brightens my day! and omg lets not forget when you made me a drabble back😳 like wha- HUH !! i was so touched i rlly went boom boom woosh bc no ones ever written me one back and i!! that yamaguchi gives me so much comfort. you give me sm comfort, thank you bub <3

@beanst0ck

hehe my first tumblr crush😼 as soon as i deactivated my reading account to my a writing blog i was like “ok bean is on my top to-follow list” like i thought you were so cool and i was vv shy to interact with you🥺 and YOU STILL ARE COOL!! your works are really amazing and i am vv much still in love w my matchup w suga :’)

@killuababie

HHHH GRR BORK BORK I LUB U B NEVER GONNA STOP LOVING YOU BHH💓✨ bro,,,, when we switched over to insta it was WILD like— our sense of humor? matched. immaculate. please i love seeing all the memes u send me it makes my day so much like u don’t understand😭 and our convos really go chaos sometimes gkfjdj i love it. u need to pull up and play among us w me sometime 😡

@bewwybun

m-my first spouse🥺 even tho it was a joke the first time and i said sike fkdjdjdj but you still accepted my dino chimken nuggie ring hehe <3 bub your are literally the CUTEST HHHHH LIKE,,, cuteness overload !!! i love talking to you sm and our little exchange of heart memes make the butterflies in my tummy go ✨

@mei-writes

may🥺 imy bub i hope you’re doing well and taking good care of yourself. still very grateful for that time you pulled through to check which of my links weren’t working. and there’s a LOT. like the fact that you took time out of your day for me still baffles me. anyway im lomve you ik we don’t talk as much but you’re still a valued moot to me. im offering u free headpats hehe

@kozsma

hi maria👉👈 you’re so wonderful and rlly amazing w your smaus. absolutely smitten over our chaotic conversations fkfjd we haven’t talked in a while but if you see this just know that i’m here for you <3 take some self care okay? hope you’re doing good bub

@tsukkeisimp

dalia, you wondering being💞 please what did i do to deserve your love >;( we don’t talk much but we have exchanged heart memes before and you’re always out here supporting me whenever you can and like!! tysm bub. i hope you’re feeling better from the last time we interacted, and please do take good care of yourself!

@satorispup

can’t believe you made a reputation of having a piss kink. what power. what energy >>> anyway it’s fun seeing your chaotic energy on my feed/tl. sometimes i won’t even look at the user and say yeah💔 that’s hero alright gkfjdj also you’re so cute what the heck😡😡

@tobiokvgs

[ insert 100 hearts ] this for u bub. im still going crazy over your tsukki lipbalm piece like i was so FLUSTERED you really did that huh😭 you’re so nice and sweet, ty for giving me headbonks as well im really glad to get them😌 hope you have an amazing day bub, and take care!!

@bunnyuuji

cutecutecutest bean ever🥺 you have such wonderful works and im truly in love with your writing😌 also you’re so SWEET WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE U GKFJDJ literally you weren’t obligated to stop by my ask and check in but u did >:(

@yanderepunkin

hehe ik we haven’t interacted in such a long time but im including you!! bc i appreciate you!! i know you’ve supported me a lot especially when i just started this blog and im really thankful for it. also uhhh im still not over accidentally turning off anon when i was- yeah😿 i wish you all the love in the world, and please do take gentle care of yourself 💓

@ahkaahshi

frannn👁👁🤲 yes im gonna start with how big brained you are. your passion for textiles and improving the environment is vv cool to me. and then there’s the fact you write these hq characters so well. yes i am absolutely still living for your character analysis. i am thriving off of them!! here’s me manifesting kita and/or sakusa to show up in your dreams hehe

@sachirou-senpai

i hope you dont mind me sending u stuff every now and then! anyway im in awe of your writing and art skills. you brought a realistic yamaguchi and i ascended😳 i genuinely think you’re such a cool person but also please take breaks!! ik it’s such an overused phrase but i genuinely mean it. i care u <3

@kenmakodzu

you’re so sweet and you do really be sending me back some heart memes😳 i go BOOM BOOM yaya that’s more to my collection;) also you and your hq anon interactions go WILD omg it really does make my day more interesting whenever i see them😂 also i do be seeing some of ur chaotic energy on my dash and i am HERE for it

@tsukkisbean

hemlo clara🥺 d-do you remember me gkdjshsjs i think its been a while since we interacted. you’re so sweet and AHH lmao did u know we were in a poly with wiss😔💔 yeah❤️ n e way i hope you’ve been alright these past few weeks, and if not, please get some break!

@atsunflower

miya twin supremacy😡 can’t believe you made me swerve over to osamu’s lane because of your amazing writing. how could you. the mf audacity. i rlly do fell in love with that piece do so THAMK U and that also goes for the support you’ve given me💗

@lespaghetti

ozzy👁👁🤝 ngl our conversations have been top tier im glad i got to uhmm,,, get some of these *thoughts* out of my head. you’re such a sweet little bean!!! that art/sketch you did with the purple (?) themed uniforms was really cute. im glad to have u as my moot and *cough* my vip reader *cough*

@sleepykarabou

our heart meme streak was strong until school happened😔 but i really enjoy them tho!! it’s very calming talking to you (fun, but also vv calming idk that’s how i feel) loving the brainrots we give each other of our favs from time to time :’) also omg OSRRY im barely active in the server please spare me😿 im lomve u

@nerdybreadcollaborative

gee!! AHHHH KGFJJD GRRR u sweet bean oh my goodness. where do i start- ??? i’ve already gushed so much abt your writing but here we go again; i love your writing so much and your attention to the little details is so great. they flow so well and i hope u get more visibility bc it’s what u deserve!! also please take care of yourself and don’t work too much u nerdy bean

@nishinoya-is-baby

ely my plant kinnie, my spouse (?) and also the blog that i dump my h word thots on😭❤️ ahhh im lomve you, you’re amazing. from your writing, to your makeup skills, and your room, the talent really ✨jumped out✨thank you for supporting me so much, i genuinely appreciate it. i hope we can stay moots despite me being busy gkfjdj anyway take care bbie don’t work too much okay?

@art0saurus

TATE😤 the amount of hq brainrot you’ve fed me is astronomical. idk how you keep coming up with such good ideas but im all for them!! i love your writing so much and the plots are so *chefs kiss* (yes im still gushing over mermaid!bokuto). thank you so much for sending some bits of positivity into my life, im really grateful for it :’)

@dorkyhaikyu

EL!😼 you sweet bean. wish i could bombard ur asks but school is saying no </3 you’re such a sweet mutual and your writing is absolutely amazing. still kinda hurt over that angst u made💔 but anyway i loved it sm. also please wear safer shoes next time on big events so u dont get any more BLISTERS kgjdjdh jkjk

@chickenwingspiker

nashnashnash🥺👉👈 wth you’re so cute and even cuter with the little emoticons u put in my asks. i really appreciate you taking time out of your day to check in on me. i think your works are really heckin cool, im still very into that sock agenda one and the akaashi fic AHH i love them sm. i hope that u have better experiences with online learning and i really wish you all the best on ur art journey <3

@miyastrology

did u forget abt our walk to the strawberry field😿 jkjk heyyy atlas!! im lomve your theme and your writing. i have the urge to say you’re as sweet as strawberry bc im unoriginal like that💔 let’s just pretend i put something kute :’( n e way u are vv cute, make sure to take care of yourself ok!!

@derpeedoo

your rb’s and comments on ppl works... i just... my heart is full. im complete. i go absolute doki doki for you. you’re such a genuine person and you give people so much love❤️ here’s an unlimited supply of my love to you bc you deserve it. ty for all the cute questions btw🥺

🕊 anon - still wondering if ur one of my already-moots or not😳 but anyway dove anon i have a lot to say,,, like how ?? do u go “ok let’s check in on aaron today hehe” like am i interesting??😭 i feel kinda bad ngl you really don’t have to talk to me. but nevertheless im really appreciate of all the support you’ve given me. i genuinely think you’re a cool person and you do all these fun stuff like photography which is amazing. here’s the biggest THANK YOU i could ever give <3 ps. your art is CUTE and AMAZING @bee-kins

@simping-for-tendou

do i??? spam your feed??😭 you’re always liking my posts and i feel so sorry for spamming but also vv appreciate of all the interaction i’ve had with you!! im very glad i got to ask you qotd and stuff because i got to know that you like plants as well!! thank you for sharing plant facts with me, it really made my day. i genuinely think you’re such an awesome and big brained person for knowing all those facts🥺👉👈

@wissaaltje

ngl i was very intimated by you bc of all your angst and really good works which is probably why i never reached out to you sooner😿 ur my uhhh third spouse <3 but anyway your CHAOTIC ENERGY is thru the roof i love that sm and your writing is so mf beautiful i wish more people got to see it😡 i will gib you flower soup and muddy pie to make you feel better ;) jkjk but you’re very amazing and i hope you know that!

@smolbludandelions

hehe you’re in here😼 thank you ???? for supporting me even tho you’re not obligated??? like wh- i- bub🥺🤲 you have all my heart and i rlly rlyy want to stop by your inbox and give you heart memes but me why >;( i hope you have the most amazing day(s) of your life because you deserve it SO much.

@tadashi-simp

FINALLY someone i can simp over yamaguchi with😭 ik we haven’t talked much but AH i love the conversations we’ve had so far and all that insight you gave me about the new wanda film (truly a blessing bc i was so genuinely confused gkfjdj).

@oikaw-ugh

just. JOLLIBEE. can’t believe one of our first interactions was u sending me chain mail smfh i cannot believe you😭 anyway po i appreciate you so much na kaka tawa ako sa mga msgs mo and all the good vibes u radiate. mag bisaya unta ko nimi pero baka mag nosebleed ako😿 im losing my native languages it’s not even funny anymore but when i got to talk to u in my mother tongue, i felt a bit more at home. thank you bub <3

@makemealive

hihi👉👈 idrk what we first talked about, i think it was spending vacation in the galapagos islands??😭 riding turtles??? what a great way to start our friendship :’) i rlly think you’re cool and i just,,,, admire u from afar- yeah. sorry this message is too chaotic but anyway u might not have a green thumb but look at you growing potatoes accidentally😌 anyway i think you’re cool i just haven’t said it before because im s Hy

@lostsealscreams

seal, bub, i genuinely care about you. you’re such a sweet person. i know we haven’t interacted much but im looking forward to more conversations with you!! please find little fun things to do... maybe do some self appropriation if you can, bc you deserve it. maybe even treat yourself... or any self care tasks that make you feel better. i care about you a lot, im just an ask/dm away if you wanna talk about anything at all💕💞✨

@hqgardenia - jkjk this is my spam account idk why i put this here but here probably bc im dumb as fuck

#cupid; talks!#queuepid

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imasimpforshanks · 3 years

Note

Hi I heard you were doing mashups and I think these are cool as hell and fun psychoanalysis of random people online so... a pair up with a female student JJK character? 👀👀

Sorry if this ends up being long 😳✌️

Anyway, I’m an ENFJ, a Virgo, a Gryffindor, and a child of Apollo. I’m the youngest of five girls, and was an accident ✌️.

Traits: I’m determined, compassionate, wise, and extroverted. I’m also very empathetic and have a need to learn more. It’s not like learn more academically, but rather learn more through experience and perspective. I’m very opinionated and usually will never shut up, but when I need to I listen. I think it’s rlly important to listen to others, ya know? I’m a total mom friend- my bag is always filled with bandaids, pads, extra masks etc. I’m also a therapist friend and I thrive off of being depended on. I want to help other people grow. I love caring for people and the one thing I want to do more than anything is make as many people smile as I can, and help make this world as good as it can be. I’m a baby activist- still figuring everything out, but trying my hardest to make sure that the important stuff is being talked about and that I listen to other people’s views.

Flaws: I’m self righteous, not very street smart, and get lost in my own mind. I constantly put others before myself and I overwork myself so I don’t have time to process negative emotions or events oops. I literally need someone to aggressively tell me to stop working. I’m on my way to being a workaholic oops.

Likes/hobbies: I love reading and writing. I love acting, singing, and dancing. A huge musical theatre nerd, always and forever. I also love researching random things and staying on top of real world problems. I like learning about new things and in the future, if I have the money lol, I really want to travel the world to learn about different cultures, political systems, and languages. I like watching movies and shows, and doing full an analysis on like everything. Also junk food and chocolate. And spending time with friends. And just like... getting to appreciate small, simple, yet beautiful moments of life

Dislikes: healthy foods. Like why? What’s the reason? Geometry. Chemistry. The American school system. The college board. Money. Why. Like money why?

I think I got all the good jist of it! Thanks! 💙

thank you for requesting! I hope you enjoy <33

i struggled to choose between maki or nobara, but in the end i decided to match you with Nobara.

okay first off, nobara is most definitely a gryffindor. and come onnnnnn a gryffindor + gryffindor???? power couple.

but, the main reason that made me choose nobara was how you said you overwork yourself. Nobara has been shown to enjoy the odd shopping trip, so she definitely knows has to relax. Shes also extremely vocal and straightforward so she would definitely be happy to aggressively say "BABE IF YOU DONT STOP WORKING NOW I WILL LITERALLY DRAG YOU TO THE MALL WITH ME."

Nobara is confident, energetic, outspoken, but also has a strong sense of empathy. So in that regard I think your personalities would click exceptionally well. and by the sounds of it, the two of you would have INCREDIBLE communication in your relationship (very important!!!).

plus, i also think nobara is a baby activist too!!! so plsssss im just imaging the two of y’all making the world a better place LOVE THAT SO MUCH <3

ya'll would be GREAT together.

match up rules here

#mikis match ups #jujutsu kaisen #nobara kugisaki #jjk anime #jjk nobara #jjk #jjk match ups

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bepoets · 3 years

Text

Review for Trish’s Dream Fic

Trish ( @couragedontdesertme ) said she’d write an epilogue of the elsarik dream Fic if I made a Formal Review of the elsarik dream fic. So here we are.

Please note review should be taken VERY LIGHTLY this is more or less me re-reading the Fic and loudly yelling about things with too many exclamation points. Enjoy Trish.

Ch1

First of all imagine my fucking surprise I didn’t even know you had gotten work done on the dream fic???? Here I was thinking the link you sent me was the next chapter of city of ice and then I click on it and it saYS DREAM FIC???? E X C U S E M E oh my goodness

The first section is just so entirely domestic and beautiful and you can tell how lived in and content they are in their life as roommates. ALARIK (listen my phone autocorrects ALARIK to be in all caps and I’m too lazy to fix it so y’all are gonna have to deal with reading ALARIK’s name as if I’m yelling it every time I type it) anyway ALARIK just bringing her the chocolate croissants she loves so dearly and Elsa curling up with a book and him fretting and worrying over her being there alone all day and later... it’s just SO DOMESTIC. it’s such a small short moment but it’s so domestic and a perfect opposite of the PAIN THAT HAPPENS AFTER!!! And we al know I LOVE READING PAIN

The fact that ALARIK was only home late because he was doing tutoring to earn more money to by Elsa A PRESENT????? Shut up no one speak to me that’s true love but also PAINFUL the guilt he must feel oh my god

Elsa...stops struggling... because she doesn’t want ,,,, ALARIK ,,,, to get hurt. Because she cares for his safety more than her own because he has protected her and he is her friend and she loves him I am going to SCREAM

The fact that you use the phrase ~marching her out of the warmth of the room~ when she just used her magic to like cover the walls in frost makes my Heart burst cause idk if it was intentional or not but I just love the thought that this room has become Home to her it’s become safe and beautiful and lovely and WARM because it is full of love and friendship and companionship rather than the cold loneliness of say her ice palace of her locked room as a child. I like to think Elsa could have covered the room entirely in ice and snow and frost and it would still feel warm to her because of the love that’s developed there thank you for coming to my tedtalk

Ugh fuck hans

I have literally no words other than fuck hans for any section with hans in it I DONT even want to RECOGNIZE THAT HE EXISTS !!! Making Elsa feel like she’s nothing I am going to punch him in the eye

~ALARIK weeps over smushed chocolate croissant. End scene~

I know that it’s such a heartbreaking sad ending for that first chapter but also I really can’t stop laughing about him crying over a stepped on croissant since I know that your like planning note for that last scene was literally just some variant of ALARIK cried over a smushed croissant and that’s just such a funny IMAGE TO ME EVEN THOUGH ITS SAD

I just like to imagine ALARIK cradling the chocolate croissant in his arms like a bébé as he sobs

Ch2

I’m fucking S A D

ALARIK having like NO MONEY and just thinking about that the money he has was going to go to a gift for Elsa and the guard LAUGHING AT HIM LIKE THATS IT THATS ALL YOU HAVE?? Like shut UP HES TRYING TO SAVE HIS BELOVED

P e t t y c h a n g e HE IS TRYING MR GUARD I WILL HAVE YOU KNOW HE WORKED EXTRA TO GET THAT MONEY

ALARIK is so fucking DEVOTED I’m going to run through a goddamn wall I cannot cope. Willing to sell the clothes off his back have you ever seen an idiot more iN LOVE

ALARIK just going willingly cause he has no fight left in him and he just wants to see Elsa even if it means he gets imprisoned too oh my GOD

THE SCENE ITS THE SCENE!!!!!!!!!

STRAIGHT FROM TRISH’S SUBCONSCIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WHAT STARTED IT ALL!!!!!!!!!!

ALARIK wanting to hold her hands when her hands are what are chained up and seen as dangerous and what ~make her a witch~ the absolute love and power that holds.

LET ALARIK AND ELSA HOLD HANDS

“I promised to keep you safe” the pain I feel oh mY GOD

“They’ll KILL you” they’re really out here trying to protect each other at all costs oh my god nothing matters more to the other than keeping the other safe and for that I want to cry and love them and also I want to ram their heads into the wall because wHY WONT THEY JUST PROTECT ESCH OTHER TOGETHER

The PARALLEL OH MY FUCKING GOD

the P A R A L L E L of ALARIK stilling and no longer struggling when the guards threaten Elsa’s death in the same way that Elsa stilled and stopped struggling when they threatened ALARIK’s death oh my god that broke me right there

U g h hans fuck that guy

A N N A !!!!!!!!

When I first read this,,, I DONT know why??? But for some reason??? I didn’t think Anna would be in it???? Which like thinking back on that it makes no sense of COURSE Anna would be in the FIC why would I ever think otherwise. But anyway I was so surprised when she showed up I literally gasped and went ANNA??? Out loud because I was so shocked

ALFAFA GERANIUM

ALARIK really is just so bad under pressure who thought this was a good idea

AG FOR SHORT wink wink nudge nudge cough cough

I’ll be thinking about ALARIK shouting alfafa geranium on my death bed let us never forget

“No harm, no foul” is literally the most fucking Anna line I’ve ever heard. She absolutely would say that to someone who was being question for a crime she’d be like “it’s not biggy”

Why is it that when hans says “BUT ANNA!!!” I hear it like he’s wining like a petulant child I read it like “bUT annNNAAAAA” ugh I hate him

“Don’t scream” *ALARIK’s inner monologue* “this ,, is the story of how I died”

ILL HELP YOU HELP HER ESCAPE!!!!! HELL YEA YOU WILL ANNA HELL YEA YOU WILL

Ch3

My dumbass really went “why are none of the children named neta” before remembering that is the child of Anna and Kristoff and these...are the children of Anna ,,, and .... ugh please don’t make me say his name

I would die for these kids though I love them and I want to protect them at all costs

Johannes at 5 (and a half!!!!) being a fine soldier GOOD FOR HIM

Isak owns my entire heart from the moment he started fake crying for his mother what a star performer a true Actor he’s too good

Arendellian Royal Guards, are they guards? Or are they simply baby sitters? The world may never know

JOAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! One of the babies being named JOAN!!! Hang in there Joan!!!!!!!!! That made me cry oh my god J O A N

Bébé Isak lookout supreme with his big eyeballs and smile and goofy lil salute I love him

The fact that Elsa says she felt stupid for being lured into a false sense of security means she felt secure and safe for literally the first time since she was a child when she was with ALARIK and I cannot properly articulate how much that made me cry I love that so much that has to mean sO MUCH TO HER oh my god

“You have to get out!! Do the magic!!” NO ONE SPEAK TO ME ABOUT ANYTHING EXCEPT THIS LINE FOR THE NEXT SEVERAL MONTHS I LITERALLY WEPT

the use of DO THE MAGIC oh my god AND ELSAS HEART LIKE BREAKING BECAUSE SHE FEELS LIKE SHE CANT

DO ! THE ! MAGIC !

Brave little boy with his mother’s determination saying “be brave. That’s what mama said to tell you” oh my GOD THESE CHILDREN HAVE MY WHOLE HEART OH MY GOD

A rooster crow for the signal COUKD they be more obvious I love these kids they’re ridiculous they are truly the children of Anna

Elsa!!! Chose!! To be!!! Brave!!!

IF SHE TRIED TO SAY GOODBYE TO ELSA!!! SHE MAY NEVER LET GO!!!

SHE HAD NO WHERE TO GO!!! BUT SHE DOES BEVAUSE THERES ALARIK WAITING FOR HER BECAUSE GUESS WHAT

ALARIK IS HER HOME !!!!! HE IS HER HOME !!!! SHE CAN GO TO HIM!!!!

Queue another one of my shocked and delightfully surprised screams as I shouted KRISTOFF????? Because blonde dude driving a reindeer cart

Let’s get you somewhere safe I’m going to cry THEYRE finally together again and they can keep each other safe together as. They. Should.

They are cuddling and my heart is exploding oh my god ALARIK seems so surprised like you big dumb idiot you’re both in love with each other it’s a mutual thing get with the program

SLEEP ELSA! ITS GOING TO BE OKAY! AND FOR THE FIRST TIME IN PROBABLY FOREVER! IT WILL BE!

Ch4

*queue another gasp* there’s only one bed?????

Yea I saw it coming yea I was just as shocked even so yea I got very excited about it wHAT DID YOU EXPECT

They’re cUDDLING and he went to move away and she DOESNT WANT HIM TO they could’ve been sharing a bed THIS WHOLE TIME AND I JUST WANT TO SCREAM BECAUSE OBVIOUSLY

ALARIK laying all the credit on kristoff and the kids when he’s kind of the one that steamrolled the whole plan into happening because he’s the one who showed up ALARIK please give yourself more credit

“You came back” “of course I came back... I couldnt ...” “why?” And then ALARIK refusing to meet her eyes has me absolutely weeping this is the kind of shit I THRIVE ON this is truly a gift to us all everyone say thank you Trish for these three bits of dialogue I will be thinking about them for all my days

ELSA KISSED HIM!!!!!!!!!

Yeah I do lose my shit anytime Elsa is the one to make the first move you go girl you go

THE SPICE VENDOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bringing in all my favorites I am going to cry thank you Trish I love Darius

I SUPPOSE YOU TWO HAVE FINALLY GOTTEN MARRIED

listen I SCREAMED WHEN HE SAID THAT I SQUAWKED!!!! MARRIED!!!!!!

I had been observing you two and just assumed!!!!! You would assume right mr spice vendor sir if they WERENT so stupid for so long it’s okay we understand

WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE ??? And Elsa says MARRY US? And ALARIK is going to PASS THE FUCK OUT

He literally got to finally kiss the woman he’s in love with for the first time last night and now they’re getting married poor boy is going to get WHIPLASH from how fast things are progressing but it’s okay im sure he is happy

Elsa’s little vows of just needing each other and keeping each other safe and keeping company and not needing gold or silver ugh TRUE LOVE

And ALARIK hopelessly devoted to her being like I PROMISE

“just you being there no matter what is enough” peak romance true love the devotion the dedication I’m a wreck

LE SMOOCH! LE MARRIAGE! INCREDIBLE I LOVE THEM

~end review~

Okay where is my epilogue please and thank you

#shards of shards #couragedontdesertme #Trish’s fics #shards #shardsverse #elsarik

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doctorgerth · 4 years

Note

Im so excited about this match ups! I would love to get romantic one! (I actually set alarm clock to dont miss it xD) My name is Veronica. Im 20yo straight girl. I have brown messy hair and green eyes i also have a lot of tattoos and im a bit chubby^^ Im also Artist. :) Im ENTP in MBTI personality test. about my personality: Im kind of sarcastic but i have good sense of humor. Im very loyal to my dearest and im very protecting to the people i love!

Omg, the fact that ppl go that far just to get a request from me is truly baffling! 🥺🥺 Well, I’m glad you were able to get a request in, love! Thank you and I truly hope you enjoy your matches 🥰

Your match is...

Sanji (ENFJ)

Sanji was obviously wooed by you when you two first met despite not knowing anything about you. He shamefully couldn’t prevent the nosebleeds from your beautiful green eyes and curvaceous body. He also never thought about tattoos much before until he met you, but god is he a sucker for them on you! They make you look so bad ass and sexy, he can;t help but to stare at them or to trace them when he’s holding you close. It honestly was nearly impossible for him to even have a conversation with you at first just because he was too awestruck by your beauty. Thankfully, he’s been able to get over himself (at least a little), because getting to know you and falling love with you has been one of the greatest blessings in his life! Unfortunately for him, your sweet personality and loving heart makes you all the more beautiful to him, so the nosebleeds still happen every now and then lol

You two share a lot of similarities but also bring plenty of differences to the table in order to make the relationship exciting! For starters, you two are both extroverted and enjoy the company of others. This proves beneficial as he comes from a crew (family) that loves to spend lots of time together and have lots of parties! So that gives you the ability to thrive and form relationships with the people who mean the most to him. You two are also extremely creative, you with your art and Sanji with his cooking. He embraces self-expression as he is the biggest fan of all your work! He keeps every piece you make him and hangs them up in his room and kitchen, little reminders of you throughout the day!

Sanji had to take some time to get accustomed to your sarcasm (even tho he’s pretty sarcastic himself) but he’s just constantly worried about making you happy and doing the right things, so when you’re a little teasing and sarcastic, he has a brief moment of panic that he did something to upset you. But once he finally understands your mannerisms, he’s able to partake in some quips with you. Sanji can get pretty sassy! Being so in love with you, Sanji will convince anyone that you’re the funniest person ever! He is always there to laugh at your jokes and his laugh is always so sweet and genuine, making you get butterflies from making your favorite person laugh so much.

Being worried about loyalty from Sanji is understandable in the first phase of the relationship when you’re just starting to get established. Because we know Sanji loves all the ladies. But, the moment he commits himself to you, he’s so invested in loving you, there’s no time for him to really ogle over anyone else! He still respects the ladies of course and he cares deeply for Nami and Robin, but Veronica is his true love!! And nothing or no one can take him away from you, so there’s no room for questioning his love for you! Sanji is extremely protective of you and he definitely can be a bit smothering at times, but it’s all in good nature. He just doesn’t want anyone or anything to harm the person he loves most. He’s always willing to lay his life down for you, despite your protests. He gets a little pouty if you protect him because he’s just that type to think it’s his job to protect you. But he’s of course thankful every time you do so!

Sanji is a sensitive soul, whether he likes to admit it or not. So there are times when he’s a bit over-emotional and unfortunately, emotionally-driven conversations are not your forte. So it takes some time for you to become more empathetic towards Sanji’s feelings since you’re a bit more logical than he is. Sanji also wants to avoid confrontation with you at all costs. He doesn’t like to think there’s something wrong in the relationship or face the fact that he’s upset with you/vice versa. So sometimes he becomes a little passive and won’t tell you if something’s wrong even though you know something is bothering him. This is usually the only things you’ll argue about, so you gotta make Sanji comfortable with communicating through an argument. Just reaffirm that you’re not going to leave him over a small argument and he’ll become more open!

You two have such big hearts for your loved ones and especially each other, so there’s really no room for doubts throughout your relationship. You two can be the cheesiest and “grossest” couple sometimes, but everyone is just truly jealous of how much love is shared between you two. Sanji makes it very obvious that you’re the one for him, even on your bad days, Sanji chooses to love you and only you, every single day. Having you reciprocate is just a dream come true to him!

Other potential suitors:

Kaku (ENTP) - You make him laugh, and honestly, that’s all it took to make him fall helplessly in love with you. In his work life, genuine joy and humor is hard to come by. But you’re able to break that shell of his and remind him of his better days, the kind of life he wishes he could have with you all the time. You’re the type of girl that really makes him want to settle down, which is something he hasn’t thought much about before! Kaku is also extremely loyal to you and knowing he has someone as equally loyal waiting at home for him just really eases his mind. He trusts you with his life!

Sabo (ENTP) - He adores how easy-going and outgoing you are. Being around you is just so comfortable and enjoyable, even in the most social settings. The loyalty and love you have for your loved ones reminds him so much of his self and he just really appreciates it. Sabo is very intrigued by your sarcasm and honestly he probably beats you in being the more sarcastic person in the relationship. He just appreciates that you two can tease each other and have fun with it. Your relationship with Sabo is very relaxed and amusing!

Coby (ISFJ) - Your caring and protective nature over your loved ones really caught his eye in the beginning. He shares the same kinds of passions and values as you, so it was inevitable for him to fall in love with you. Life is pretty stressful for this Marine, so your easy-going nature always helps him to relax. He doesn’t have to try to be anything he’s not around you, you love and protect him with your life and he’s ever thankful and definitely reciprocates!

#doctorgerth #one piece #one piece matchup #op matchup #matchup #1000 follower event #matchup event #follower event #cykadaa

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swampgallows · 4 years

Text

i got distracted earlier and forgot to post but im thankful for my mutuals who have helped me time and again, even if it’s in ways you may not know. i appreciate you all so much and i am so grateful for the friends i’ve made here and the small but intimate community cultivated through tumblr.

zbfc and wch, thank you for everything. @zeyan i love you with all my heart and i’m so fucking thankful i could have funny airbnb time with you and @aeiroki grimlock hunterpunter. you make me laugh every single day and i always want the best for you both (and jack!!! and PARKER!!!)

@lokaror thank you for letting me share my love of rexxar and bears with you. we’ve shared a lot of fantastic laughs together, some very fun stuff and some very deep shit too. i treasure every one of our convos together, and your playlists too!

@reglei thankful i finally got to beat you into submission at blizzcon. youre a sweetheart and a sleepyhead. thanks for listening to me ramble late into the night. i appreciate all the times youve had my back, whether it was creepy dudes or spoilers or w/e. you shoulda killed me w gorehowl when you had the chance

I LOVE @amarysue i miss you when you work long hours but i’m always so happy when we get to play games together. i hope you can leave the mcdonalds playplace soon. also i dont get to say it much but i love talking about academic stuff with you. i know i rib you about dark leafy greens but you are very educated in a lot of amazing fields and i love when you share your knowledge with me!!! i love amary!!!!

@theabsolutevoid i know youre the void but youre a golden human being of radiant light. you are so spectacular, we are all always in amazement of your passion and creativity and constant flow of ideas, and your compassion seems boundless. i am so grateful to know such a special person and spent many late nights laughing to tears with you

@perce the dynamic duo... im thankful daygo got me into ladybug so i could hear all of your amazing takes on it as they are equally as hilarious as your wow takes. i admire your resilience, though that might be weird to say, and though i know i’m an old crone youre definitely a role model for me taking command of my own life and establishing boundaries to become the person i want to be. i’m so grateful we got to spend blizzcon together again!! and thank you for getting me the long-forgotten hippogryph. its a very important memory to me.

refugees i know i dont pop in much but i still love you all dearly. im embarrassed actually because you are all functional adults and i’m not but when i get a job and reenter society i want to be able to come back and say i’m a big kid now

thrainosh squad @irenthel @wckhamm etc thank you for letting me indulge my interests without ridicule or judgment. @fitzefitcher i dunno you changed my life SORRY there is not a less fucked up way to say that. no pressure

@sithisis & crew thank you for so many incredible hots games and wonderful memories and all of your sweetness and fun times!!! sith you have inspired and supported so much of my writing and my ideas and i am in awe that you are getting so many amazing opportunities working in games journalism!!! i know theres a lot of grunt work but at the end of the day it seems like youre really doing something you genuinely love (and are good at!!) and i’m so happy for you. you work hard and you deserve it. im love skitty w a gun

@steblynkaagain your art is such an inspiration to me, and i’m amazed by your cosplay too! i’m thankful that even across language barriers we can enjoy thraina and silly modern AUs together. i am so impressed by your intelligence and achievements. your comic where you pledge yourself to Thrall’s Horde is still so important to me, and every day i think about your mechanic garrosh..... and doctor drek’thar, and doctor thrall, and SHAMAN GARROSH....... (sob)

@captainkaprozyx and @sdei ... i am so thankful for all of your artwork and your amazing gifts. i am working on getting them framed, and your zine was amazing! you are a great team and I love your collaborations. also sdei’s birthday gift is still my discord icon. we just really love a big guy huh....... cannot express how inspiring your artwork is. the detail, the colors... it brings me to tears, i am so stunned. you are both so incredibly talented!

@omnifariousness bro i dont even know where to start. many good dog times and we can strike up the late night jawin again soon i hope. shit has been scattered and i know youve been dippin back n forth on the road but i hope the shit evens out soon for you. excited for you to see tool in feb and damn dude every DAY i think about the reading you treated me to of the 40k stuff for your reel. god man i want that VA shit to work out for you bad. your diction is impeccable and you so deserve it

@darnjam i know you guys dont read this but i love you so much and every day i’m so thankful we’re all still friends. @daygloow thank you for being like the sole source and catalyst for my personal development for like the last 3 years, im so proud of you and everything youve worked so hard to achieve and i’m so glad youre getting the recognition you deserve. thank you for always picking me up (vehicular and emotional) and for watching cartoons n playin vidya with me. god whens the next GOOD rave? i need to make you proud and actually dj so i can play banana

@bluntcrusher every day i’m like god when will king tori take the throne... im so thankful that youre in a good spot finally and that youre getting the love you deserve. and plus a sweet pucci mane. my blogs a mess but im glad youre still stickin around for it haha. always happy to see youre safe and THRIVING

@swarnpert love you dude thank you for lettin me harass you w 420 snaps. bro when you sent me those sabaton snaps i was in line for the haunted mansion at disneyland during blizzcon and it was just like... my heart was so full, it meant so much to me ALSO HOLY SHIT i love your art please NEVER STOP drawing

@nelfs i love your blog and your art and your FEELINGS like I dunno how to word it in a not-weird way. i think you are a very bright person with a good heart, and i’m thankful to know someone like that, even tangentially. it is fortifying also to see someone stand up for the things they love, whether it’s just a cartoon show or something of serious concern like animal welfare. i admire your healthy relationship to yourself and your strong integrity.

@neophyte-redglare i think about bead world garrosh every fucking day of my life. cannot thank you enough. i treasure it

@redpandalori THIS IS THE MVP RIGHT HERE. i dunno when you started sending me floods of kittums but every day i look forward to it and every single one means so much to me. i wear the kandi you handcrafted for me every single day and i show it off constantly to my friends because it’s just mindblowing. you are so sweet and thoughtful and i love sendin you snaps and it’s just incredible how the internet is. thank you for sending me rain snaps and kito & harley/ears & lilith pics all the time

@hungwy i dunno WHAT you get outta my blog but i’m thankful for the reams of sweet animal pics and interesting linguistic and anthropology posts on your blog. you’re a very positive force on my dash and you seem a wonderful person irl too!

@ubersaur im so happy we’re still mutuals after all this time lmao. you were one of the first aces id ever known so we’ll always have that solidarity and i’ll always be thankful. and i have to seriously catch up on magus bride haha. thank you for all of your love and support after all this time, i hope i offer the same to you!!

@18milliondeadplebs the rare and beautiful nexus of my two sole interests... warcraft and raving. dude just thank you for existing man LMAO i hope we can go ravin together some day

@kontextmaschine what a strange long fuckin trip it’s been dude. super surreal to have raved with you and had you come all the way down for burst but i knew i’d be remiss if youd missed it. you definitely deserved a potent taste of the 90s. thank you for the usb sticks, im still waiting on a worthy recipient for the other two. the majority of your blog is practically in hieroglyphics to me but man when the posts hit... they fuckin hit. i know you dont need me to tell you, but youve got a great talent and weirdass fuckin eye. a very very particular eye. love you man. please kiss badger for me.

@ironbull thank you for suffering in wisdom tooth hell with me. i am glad you had a good time at disney world and im hoping we can both be free of all of our tooth woes soon. thank you also for your advice and support in my personal stuff too!!

@kittensceilidh thank you for your sweet messages! every one of your hugs means a lot to me!!! it is nice to feel seen when i am in dark places.

@dimedog warcraft and foggy forests... hell yeah dude

@tim-official man sometimes it really is as simple as just laughing at the same funny shit, but youve reached out to me too and i appreciate it!!!

@peanotbotter thank you for all of the laughs and the kind words! thank you for caring about me, i care about you too!! i hope we can play hots again or wow together soon!!!

wow this got long but i love a bunch of people. there are more of you that i love and are very special to me and i apologize if i didnt get to you. i hope you all had a nice holiday, if you celebrated. thank you for believing in me

#blathering

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thefeckisthis · 4 years

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being single and open relationship

hellooo lovely people. hope you are all well, sane and well fed. lately i did not write quite often, been reading a lot and gaming. life is not particularly interesting so there is not much going on.

even tho these are different times people still talk, chat and i’ve seen many guys making statuses how girls are not posting selfies now all the beauty salons are closed, making fun of them. well there are not many of you fuck boys around anymore either eh, hard to make some effort when you can’t ‘’score’’ and disappear? or you’re stuck with your girlfriends so its harder?

leave the girls alone, live your own life and mind your own business. even tho the number of fuck boys has drastically dropped, there are still people who make some effort and talk to other people. i’m not saying this only happened to me in the past few months, people keep asking me this all the time.

so why am i single?

im not super young anymore, im in that age where most of my generation is already married and are having their first or even second kid. not me tho, thank you but i’ll pass.

guys usually ask ‘’how can girl like you be single?’’... may i ask you, what kind of girl is that? i know they usually refer to the thing that im beautiful or good looking (in their words not mine) and i keep wondering what does someones looks have to do with someone being single or in relationship? does that mean everyone who is in relationships is beautiful or if youre beautiful you have to be in a relationship? someone please enlighten me. thank you.

on the other hand, some people think i still love some certain people and haven’t moved on emotionally and things like that and that is so not true. i dont have any ‘leftover’ feelings for anyone and i dont like anyone romantically at the moment (and on daily basis i dont like people in general, thats another story tho haha). someone being single for long time doesnt mean they cant get over someone from their past. i kind of pride myself on getting over people quicker than most people, that doesnt mean i cant develop feelings. i can, im just way more careful with that. also, that doesnt mean i never truly liked them (havent loved anyone in a very long time hahaha) its just i dont tend to dwell on it for long. that person is not in my life anymore, why would i spend more time thinking about them when it wont affect my present?

i close that chapter in my life and just move on. not meaning for it to sound as a sob story or trying to make people feel pity for me, every time i have had started to develop some feelings for someone it backfired. made me develop trust issues and i openly admit it. and every time it backfires at me it makes it slightly worse and worse and leaves scars and honestly makes me regret ever developing any feelings. it all developed in like a defense mechanism making me want to do it again less and less.

as ive said, this is not a sob story and im not looking for people to feel sad about me. that is definitely not the only reason why im single but it is a part of it.

i chose to be single. i love being single. i have grown to love myself so much that i dont require to be in a relationship to feel fulfilled or to feel ‘’whole’’. if you find someone you fall in love with that person should not be your second half because you are one whole on your own, that other person should be a beautiful addition to your life, not someone to fill in the gaps. and if you break up you should still be able to feel complete and happy. dont think i am in celibate or i dont meet people when im single. the amount of people thinking if youre single youre not having sex is ridiculous. like seriously people, it 2020, you dont have to get into relationship just to have sex. to think that in this era of fuckboys, internet dating and all that crap... cmon like

explanation is not my strong side so im sorry if i dont fully explain something. relationships and feelings for me are... good and bad. i like them and i dont like them. to me the concept of traditional relationship is like a cage. i dont have freedom (at least not the way i want) that i want, and all the ‘’obligations’’ (cant remember the term that would better explain it). sure, when you like/love someone you usually talk all the time, tell them what you do, where you go, but as an introvert sometimes i just want to shut the whole world out and be left alone for more than a day if that is how i feel. by nature im curious and love to explore, whether it is myself or the world around me and the traditional relationship ‘’wouldn’t allow’ that, its looked down on. why do you want to try something new if you already, lets put it this way, have someone by your side?

but like yes, surely that person can fulfill me both physically and emotionally, what if someone can add to it in a different way, why would i deny myself of that pleasure?

open relationship is something would be something that would be more of my liking. do i believe it is possible to love one person fully and still want to try something with other person? definitely yes. it would start probably as exclusive until the mutual trust and understanding is achieved then we can add to it. and yes, its adding to what we already have, not replacing, not changing, not cheating - adding. that absolutely doesnt mean that the main partner is not enough, its just expanding the current experience. i was in a serious relationship where i loved the person so much and i did mention the possibility of open relationship and it wasnt accepted well and no judgement, it is not for everyone, we all dont seek for same things.

humans are creatures with needs and i believe that satisfaction can come from different people in different ways and that doesnt diminish the value of primary partner. rather than always feeling caged and limited,‘’scared’’ and suppressing your needs, you get the freedom to explore, to broaden your horizons. open relationship is not same as cheating as long as both partners are aware of the nature of the relationship and mutually agree on that, at the end of the day you always end up with them.

dont get me wrong, im not out there actively looking for relationship, im just living in the moment. those kind of things happen on their own and should not be forced, and now days anything that is not according to some standard norms is looked down on. as well, i am perfectly happy on my own, i chose to be single and im loving it. im the main person for myself, i love myself and i am thriving. absolutely enjoying my life.

i dont feel sad or lonely or of any less value than your average person just because im single, not at all. this also made me selfish in a way, i want all the experiences for myself and my enjoyment and i dont want to limit them to make someone else happy or secure.

there are of course more reasons than these mentioned, if youre curious please do leave a question, dont be afraid! :D (my priorities in life are usually not focused on finding a partner)

if youre not happy on your own and with yourself, how are you happy in relationship? so dont go asking people why are they single and think they are sad because of it and feel sorry for them, people do not have same needs and wants in life like you do. at the end of the day, the person who you should be most mindful of is you, your thoughts and your life. make sure you are happy with yourself because that is the person you have to live with 24/7. and once you are happy with the person you are, then you wont have the need to ‘worry’ about the others,

#love #relationship #open relationship #happy #single #single life

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simplysparrow14 · 4 years

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“Shadows Of The Dark Crystal” Book Review

So, I'm going to say this write out the bat: I gave this book ⭐⭐⭐

And I give it three stars, mostly because it wasn't a bad book by any means, but I found myself really disappointed with this book on a number of issues. I felt that this book had really great potential, but it merely stays in the lane of “It's a first book in a series.”

To sum up the entire book:

“Shadows of the Dark Crystal” takes place within the world of Thra, The home planet of the Dark Crystal. We see the gelfling empire thriving. Everything is peaceful, there are no wars to be fought, every clan is living their best lives, and they are prospering alongside their benevolent rules, the bird-like creatures known as The Skeksis.

In “Shadows”, we follow a young gelfling tomboy by the name of Naia. Naia is the daughter of the clan Maudra, or leader, but she kind of resents her status of future maudra. She once had dreams of being called upon to serve The Skeksis, these fair rulers who claim to be the Protectors of Thra, but her dreams were dashed aside when The Skeksis came to call upon her twin brother Gurjin instead. Because of this, she mostly spends her days training to be the next future maudra, to harness a healing fire that has been passed through the Drenchen bloodline for generations.

One day, while patrolling through the swamp, Naia finds a visitor walking making their way toward her home. Because of how thick and large the swamp is, Visitors are not common within the swamp, so she;s very on edge as too why this silver-hair, fair-skinned gelfling is trooping through the swamp like an idiot. Following the visitor, it turns out that the visitor, a Vapra gelfling by the name of Tavra, had arrived with a message from the ever-powerful All-Maudra, who sends a message that Gurjin has been branded a traitor to the Skeksis, and is now to be put to trial at the Castle of the Crystal.

And then everything goes from there….

So from the get-go, I’ve always been hesitant about reading this book. It's mainly because of how deeply I would compare and contrast the TV Show vs The Books.

I was very afraid that my high-expectations and Love for the show would taint my reading experience throughout the book, and thankfully, for a majority of the book, it did not taint it. I found myself enjoying it. but that doesn't mean that I don't find myself really disappointed with the execution of those ideas.

As usual, I really found myself loving the world of Thra. The way the landscapes and locations are told is absolutely spectacular and i can see everything very clearly. The way J.M Lee encorperates “Clan Life” in the narrative is also wonderful--I absolutely love the snippets we get, like the drenchen putting their dirty food plates in small hanging baskets and leaving them out to get washed in the rain, or the Sprition having a small communal cooking fire and their relationship with the podlings is fantastic.

The Skeksis were goofy and horrifying as always. and the climax of the book was very intense and action pact. The dialogue for the Skeksis, however, was very jarring at first, especially with the other Skeksis that wasn't the chamberlain. I'm so used to hearing that very lyrical, very quotable dialogue from the show.

“All the better to hold on life, no matter the cast.”

“All ready a solution lies within the Scientists very grasp.”

“We are the lords of the Crystal-- We have ruled for a thousand trine, and we shall rule for a thousand more--We are Eternal!

“I plant lies in the ground--Watch grow into Truth.”

“Two questions answer each other.”

“Gelfling have always been ruled--heads down, backs bent!”

The characters were quite pleasant--They did the job they were given.

Naia and Kylans friendship was so soft and so pure. Just the way the two bonded and cared for each other really made their relationship all the more adorable.

I loved the rivalry that Tavra and Naia sort of formed, it felt very pure to the conflict within the show, with them allking each other “Drenchen” and “Vapran” with such hatred and disdain.

I also loved the amount of clan racism that was in this book. I loved the ways that the gelfling treated each other, with one of the most prominent encounters being with Naia and Maudra Mera. I love how J.M Lee wrote the dialogue for the scene--It was very passive aggressive in a way, with Mera basically telling Naia “Alright now, I'm giving you a meal and a place to sleep, but as soon as the sun rises over those mountains, you need to take your dreadlocks and swamp-smell and get out of my clan”

But im afraid thats where my praise for this book ends, Now onto my complaints.

So, the book is written in very short chapters, each with maybe 8-10 pages each. It makes for avery quick read, but thats where one of my complaints with the book lies: There's not enough time within the chapter to fully flesh out the scenes. We do get confrontation on some scenes that come in later chapters, particularly the scene where Kylan explains to Naia that he himself experienced the same vision-residual echo as she had within the dark wood and their dreamfast, but it wasn't enough for me. It felt as if the book was holding me back with the end of a fairly long pole. I really wanted to dive deep into scenes, explore these characters thoughts and feelings about whatever was happening, but the book wasn't allowing that unless it was directly needed.

It absolutely felt like the Aughra and Brea scene within The Dream-Space where Brea was like, “Hey--What's wrong with the Crystal?! Why is it cracked?!”

And Aughra’s just like, “We don't have time for that! We’ll get there when we get there! No time for emotional scenes, we need to get this plot moving!”

Another thing that kind of ties up with my first point, is that while the Characters were good and they played their roles well, they’re relationships and dynamics were not fully fleshed out. Everyone felt confined to a role and no one felt fully able to push against those roles.

One of the reasons why I love the protags in the TV show is that the writers gave them a chance to push against their roles:

Rain is supposed to be a guard of the castle, this impressive force of strength and bravery, but in actuality he’s very much a coward and like what the chamberlain says, he runs the first chance he gets. Throughout the season we see him learn from this fight-or-flight mentality, we see him lean to stand his ground and grow a pair in facing the skeksis.

Deet is a happy little farm child who has a positive outlook on life, but that doesn't mean that she doesn't experience doubt and fear about her journey and her meaning to this big quest. We see her start to view the world differently, and in the end, we see her take a life, something she would have never had done in her lifetime (Granted she took the life of a diseased dodo-overlord, but given that deep is literally a sunshine child, she would have loved Skeklash, warts and all. )

Brea is a princess who loves to learn, she boasts about how she’s read certain books more then once and how she lives in complete luxury, but we also see her being a smartass. She’s manipulative and quick-witted and kind of conniving in the most endearing way.

In “Shadows,” I never got any of that. I get that its a first book in a series and that as the books go on, the characters character-development will start to come into play, but I feel as though, at the end of book one, your characters should be at least a little bit different than at the beginning.

In the end, Naia still felt like Naia. Yes, She discovered that the Skeksis were killing gelfling and yes her wings came in at the last second, but in the end, Naia still felt the same as she did in the first page. She had changed, yes, but not enough for me to be really be pumped to see where her character goes from end.

Same with Kylan. He felt changed, but not enough for me to be excited for him.

One last thing I need to say is that I wanted the background characters to be more fleshed out.Obviousl, again, I know we have more books in the series to go through to get some development, but i really wanted them to feel real enough for me that when they do come back in the later books, Im absolutly excited to see where they go. I love Naia’s family--I love Laesid. I love Bellanji. I love Naia’s little sisters. I love them all, but I wanted them to have more agency on the plot. I love how protective Bellanji and Laesid are of their Children, especially when this silver-haired stranger comes tromping through their swamp and just spits out, “Hey i'm sorry for bothering you during your lovely dinner but your only son is now a traitor to the skeksis and if he doesnt turn himself in we’re going to hunt him down like a nebrie.”

And both Laesid and Bellanji are like “eXuSe mE tHe FuCk?!”

But that also what bothers me is that they do all their negotiating and planning within this scene in Laesids room. There's never a time where Naia and Lakeside and Bellanji and her sisters are gathered AS A FULL FAMILY to discuss what the hell they are going to do about this situation. They’re only son, Gurjin, has just been branded a traitor to the crystal and If they dont bring him home and let him have an audience with the All-Maudra, they themselves are going to be branded traitors as well. I feel as though with those prospects, the entire family would have taken a few moments to talk about it, instead of Laesid just going, “Okay Bellanji, take Naia with you when you go to the All-Maudra because plot demands her to go.”

And that's where I think my biggest issue with the whole entire book lies. It fleshes out things, but not enough to where it really packs a punch. It never fully brings it home for me. When I read, I want to be invested. But with this book, I was invested, but not in the way that I wanted.

Some miscellaneous things:

The Skeksis take Naia to a part of the Castle known as the All-Maudra’s guest Quarters. This suggests that the All-Maudra spent the night within the caslte, thus making it canon that the All-Maudra had seen a naked Skeksis walk the halls of the castle before.

Tavra just causally popping her arm back into its socket like it was normal Tuesday for her.

Bellanji flirting with Laesid while she tents to his wounds.

Laesin having (1) leg and being more badass for it

Gurjin being more interested in hunting in the swamp and wooing “Lassi-wings” up into trees for some fun times.

That (1) podling definitely called playfully insulted Naia on her way to the village.

Neech being best eel. 11/10 would fetch anything.

#Bring your tea cups because i brought the tea #the dark crystal age of resistance #dark crystal #The dark crystal #review

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