red mother, laurel radzieski / the thick of it (2005-2012) / the beggar, swans / the parasite, swans / ladybug found in transverse colon during colonoscopy / some guy on twitter in 2011 / wiktionary page for stoma / the thick of it 2x01 commentary / some article / peachy, missy higgins / various images of ophiocordyceps, cordyceps, and other insects
Ocean Vuong Someday I'll Love Ocean Vuong / Catherine Lacey Cut / Agustin Gómez-Arcos (tr. William Rodamor) The Carnivorous Lamb / unknown / Kellin Childhood trauma / Nguyệt Lê Girl Memories Drawing / Reynier Llanes Stay / Nicola Yoon The Sun is Also a Star / Clementine von Radics
i. Ocean Vuong, Someday I'll Love Ocean Vuong
[ "Don't worry. Your father is only your father until one of you forgets" ]
ii. Catherine Lacey, Cut
[ "if you're raised with an angry man in your house, there will always be an angry man in your house. you will find him even when he is not there." ]
iii. Augustin Gomez-Arcos, The Carnivorous Lamb
[ "The word 'Father' rotted in my mouth" ]
iv. unknown
[ "LET YOUR DAD DIE: IT'S FINE / IT'S FINE / IT'S WHAT HE DID TO HIS DAD / IT'S WHAT HE WOULD DO FOR YOU" ]
v. Kellin, Childhood trauma
[ "My father had the kind of anger all fathers do. / Loud and terrible. / It lingers for your whole life." ]
vi. Nguyet Le, Girl Memories Drawing
[ Drawing of a woman with long, straight black hair and a somber expression reaching out into a white void shaped like a man. Her hand pushes straight into his torso. ]
vii. Reynier Llanes, Stay
[ Painting of a brunette woman wearing a pink dress with her back turned towards the viewer. She rests one hand on the balcony and holds another up. Beside her is the transparent form of a person sitting on the balcony looking down at her. ]
viii. Nicola Yoon, The Sun is Also a Star
[ "I wish I still felt that way. Growing up and seeing your parents' flaws is like losing your religion. I don't believe in God anymore. I don't believe in my father either." ]
ix. Clementine von Radics
[ "Every time a man yells / you are seven years old again / and he is packing that suitcase / once more. Picking you up by the neck, teaching you obedience. To be soft, / like the belly of a fish / exposed to a knife." ]
Thinking about how most of the time when you have the option to stay quiet during a companion quest you get approval for letting them handle it and sometimes even get disaproval for talking over them
And then with Shadowheart's quest speaking up with Viconia not only gives a +5(while *keep silent* gives nothing) but also if you don't do that she will look genuinely scared when Viconia asks you to hand her over
[Image description: A cut-up poem. Transcript as follows, "old men fast in the kitchen / most are not well // most mean little to me // my head / my hate / are cooked and fashioned / like this southern meal / I believe I should be food / girls and women collect my corpse / feed on my body".]
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on: making feminist art from tradwife facebook memes
You blamed me. But what is the difference between pulling away slowly and doing it all at once. In the end, we will still end up being the ghost of each other anyway.
🪆would love one featuring Russian thoughts on God! ✝️
SO. I could have sworn that I've posted "Avvakum in Pustozyorsk" on this blog before, but I can't seem to find it so here it is.
(For context, this is written in the voice of a 17th century Russian Orthodox priest and religious dissident (an "Old Believer"). Avvakum was sent to the military outpost of Pustozyorsk where he was imprisoned four fourteen years, then eventually burned at the stake. It uses this historical voice to reflect on the religious persecution of the Soviet era. Also, it's fairly long, so I've highlighted my favorite stanzas.)
Avvakum in Pustozyorsk
The walls of my church
are the ribs round my heart;
it seems life and I
are soon bound to part.
My cross now rises,
traced with two fingers.
In Pustozyorsk it blazes;
its blaze will linger.
I’m glorified everywhere,
vilified, branded;
I have already become
the stuff of legend:
I was, people say,
full of anger and spite;
I suffered, I died
for the ancient rite.
But this popular verdict
is ugly nonsense;
I hear and reject the
implied censure.
A rite is nothing –
neither wrong nor right;
a rite is a trifle
in God’s sight.
But they attacked our faith
and the ways of the past,
in all we’d learned as children,
and taken to heart.
In their holy garments,
in their grand hats,
with a cold crucifix
in their cold hands,
in thrall to a terror
clutching their souls,
they drag us to jails and
herd us to scaffolds.
We don’t debate doctrine,
of books and their age;
we don’t debate virtues
of fetters and chains.
Our dispute is of freedom,
and the right to breathe –
about our Lord’s will
to bind as he please.
The healers of souls
chastised our bodies;
while they schemed and plotted,
we ran to the forests.
Despite their decrees,
we hurled our words out
of the lion’s mouth
and into the world.
We called for vengeance
against their sins
along with the Lord;
we sang poems and hymns.
The words of the Lord
were claps of thunder.
The Church endures;
it will never go under.
And I, unyielding,
reading the Psalter,
was brought to the gates
of the Andronikov Monastery.
I was young;
I endured every pain:
hunger, beatings,
interrogations.
A winged angel
shut the eyes of the guard,
brought me cabbage soup
and a hunk of bread.
I crossed the threshold –
and I walked free.
Embracing my exile,
I walked to the East.
I held services
by the Amur River,
where I barely survived
the winds and blizzards.
They branded my cheeks
with brands of frost;
by a mountain stream
they tore out my nostrils.
But the path to the Lord
goes from jail to jail;
the path to the Lord
never changes.
And all too few,
since Jesus’s days,
have proved able to bear
God’s all-seeing gaze.
Nastasia, Nastasia,
do not despair;
true joy often wears
a garment of tears.
Whatever temptations
may beat in your heart,
whatever torments
may rip you apart,
walk on in peace
through a thousand troubles
and fear not the snake
that bites at your ankles –
though not from Eden
has this snake crawled;
it is an envoy of evil
from Satan’s world.
Here, birdsong
is unknown;
here one learns patience
and the wisdom of stone.
I have seen no colour
except lingonberry
in fourteen years
spent as a prisoner.
But this is not madness,
nor a waking dream;
it is my soul’s fortress,
its will and freedom.
And now they are leading me
far away and in fetters;
my yoke is easy,
my burden grows lighter.
My track is swept clean
dusted with silver;
I’m climbing to heaven
on wings of fire.
Through cold and hunger,
through grief and fear,
towards God, like a dove,
I rise from the pyre.
O far-away Russia –
I give you my vow
to return from the sky,
forgiving my foes.
May I be reviled,
and burned at the stake;
may my ashes be cast
on the mountain wind.
There is no fate sweeter,
no better end,
than to knock, as ash,
at the human heart.