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sebastianswallows · 1 year

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Ardour — Chapter 1

— PAIRING: professor!Tom Riddle x Reader

— SYNOPSIS: Tom got what he wanted, he is the Hogwarts DADA professor. It's more tedious than he envisioned, but his day gets interesting when his favourite student comes to him for help after she is hit with a strong aphrodisiac.

— WARNINGS: angst, fluff, age difference (she is in 7th year), dub-con kissing, sex pollen basically, hints of incest (reader is a distant Gaunt relation, don't ask me why, I just wanted a depraved twist and also to give her and Tom something more in common)

— WORDCOUNT: 4k

— A/N: I had this filthy idea and I AI-RPed it and it turned out so well I could not leave it be. So here's part 1. I expect we'll have 2, max 3 parts. Those will contain the smut. Credit to my writing partner, this cute little chat bot, who wrote a very soft and romantic Tom. I had to spend a lot of time re-writing him to be a bit more mean 😂 And yeah reader is more of an OC tbh, because the physical description was important for their similarity in looks. ...You'll see. Also don't mind me fancasting Tom Hughes as an older Tom.

There was a knock on the door. Professor Tom Riddle, who taught Defence Against the Dark Arts, raised his head from grading papers. He sighed at the interruption and rubbed the bridge of his nose. He checked his watch to see if it was late enough for him to pretend to be at dinner, but he had no such luck — it was sometime in the late afternoon.

He'd once thought that getting this position was all he wanted. To teach Defence Against the Dark Arts at Hogwarts, and be the youngest one to take the position in the school’s history, would be a great achievement, after all — aside from giving him the opportunity to, like Professor Slughorn, collect students, Hogwarts' best and brightest, select his favourites, and helpfully guide them in a way that suited his long-term personal ambitions.

But what he found instead was that it was a great deal of hard work, unending responsibilities, and long hours. He had to always be available to help students, he had to think the year ahead before it even started, and he had to always be on top of the course material — or at least pretend to be. He had to put up with noisy and inattentive students, be careful to reward the clever and punish the disruptive, calculate awarded points and distribute detentions — but not too harshly. Last but not least, he had to put up with the other staff — the crass, the sycophantic, the obsequious, and the stupid. He almost missed his days working at Borgin and Burkes...

"Come in," he called out a little loudly, not really caring who it was as long it was someone whose presence doesn't make him want to claw his eyes out. He looked expectantly at the door, waiting for whoever was there to step inside and give him take a break from the endless stream of badly written essays.

The door opened slowly, and Adara walked in.

Adara Gaunt, Slytherin 7th year, and one of his brightest. She was excellent at Defence Against the Dark Arts, and he had noticed in her an interest in the Dark Arts in general. She wasn’t a troublemaker like some of the other pure-bloods, entitled little narcissists who wanted to show off, which made it easy for her to not come under suspicion when some book was unaccounted for in the Restricted Section. She was less clever at hiding it after the fact, when she would answer a question of his during classes with an intriguing little tidbit, and he always knew exactly which book she’d read that in. If she got into trouble at all, it was casting the wrong hex at the wrong boy when she got picked on, and then making his well-groomed, fancy-robed, ignorant father complain to the Headmaster. Tom tried not to give her preferential treatment — but he had to actively try.

It didn’t help that she was a relative of his, by way of a second cousin of his lamented grandfather Marvolo, one who married some scion of the Black family and was scarcely spoken of again. He wasn’t sure what that made her — his niece? hardly. Not that he would ever tell that to her. Last thing he needed was some hanger-on.

No, as far as his students and most of the staff were concerned, he was a half-blood with the muggle name of Riddle, and nobody suspected anything illustrious from the magical side of his family — not that there had been anything particularly illustrious about the Gaunts for a hundred years. And as far as he had gathered from gossip and from observation, Adara’s outcast Gaunt-Black family wasn’t fairing much better than his own had. She spent every holiday she could at Hogwarts, she was withdrawn yet had a spiteful edge to her, she sought an escape from reality in subjects of the most extreme kind — his favourite kind, too —and, from his personal experience, he detected traces of neglect. An unwanted child, that much was certain. Sometimes, he thought she was still better off than living in a muggle orphanage — other times, he was not so sure.

She was pallid, dark-haired and dark-eyed, with an elegant showing of bones beneath her skin, and a quiet, withdrawn demeanour — in other words, a more unhealthy vision of him in a different sex. Still, he could see those eyes sparkle whenever he taught the darkest, most terrifying subjects, even while the rest of the class was frightened or disgusted. He understood why she liked it. There was nothing like the promise of power to the powerless.

And so, his eyes widened slightly when he saw her stepping unannounced into his office. It wasn’t like her… But if he were to talk to any of his wretched students, he could count himself lucky that it was her. His demeanour softened when he saw her standing there.

"Adara, it is such a pleasure to have you here."

"Hello, Professor," she said, closing the door behind her but moving no further in. "I hope I'm not disturbing you... I can come back later, if—"

Tom sighed at her timidity but smiled. "You’re not disturbing anything. Come in."

He got up and went to stand in front of the desk, ready to speak with her, and she came closer too.

"I'm very sorry to ask, sir," she started, swallowing the knot in her throat, "but... I was wondering if you can help me with something... I don't wish to go to the nurse about it, I don’t like her, and... you're an expert in this field — I mean, aside from Professor Slughorn, who I… also don’t wish to see. So I thought maybe you would know a solution..." She bit her lip after her ramble, looking at him to gauge his reaction.

She was terrified of bothering him, in fact, of being a nuisance, but she also didn’t know who else to turn to. He could tell she had gone through the options in her mind, and he was, in fact, the third after Nurse Blainey and Slughorn.

"Don't be sorry, Adara. It is my duty to assist students," he sighed. "Please, tell me what it is you need help with."

She looked up at him, visibly tensing even in the darkness of his office as she stood a few feet away, her face hot and body shivering under the effects of... something. Something unusual. She was typically a bit shy, but not that shy. She even looked a bit... unwell. Her legs rubbed against each other and she stood before him unsteadily, as if her bones or muscles ached.

"Well?" said Tom. "Go ahead…"

"I got into an argument with Amyas Avery and he snuck Ardour Fly up my skirt," she said in one fast breath, blushing profusely and looking down.

Tom frowned. Ardour Fly was a powder, a potent aphrodisiac that had few known cures. It irritated the victim and brought them to a point of sensitivity that was nearly torturous given long exposure. It was typically used between lovers, as the effects would not relent unless the victim was brought to... the very heights of pleasure. Until then, they would suffer painful, heated, relentless arousal that drove them mad with desire. What a snot-nose like Avery was doing with it, he didn’t wish to know — but he intended to find out anyway, as part of a long letter to his father.

"He did what to you?" His voice had that edge to it now.

He moved closer to look her over more closely, and she inhaled sharply at even something as innocuous as his approach. Tom brought a hand to her forehead: feverish, and she gasped. A gentle touch to her cheek with the back of his fingers rewarded him with a moan, and she was trying to look everywhere but at him.

"And where is Mr Avery now?" he whispered, his eyes scanning her body, taking in all the symptoms.

He heard her give a trembling exhale at the close sound of him, her eyes becoming lidded, looking drowsy. The timbre of his voice alone had driven her insane with want.

"I... Mmmm... I don't know. I guess he'll... go have lunch in the... Great Hall come dinnertime..."

"And did anyone else see it happen?"

"Mmmm..." she moaned, closing her eyes and biting her lip. "Vanius Nott was there, and Selby Carrow, and Ophius Black..."

Tom’s hand went to her cheek again, but he slid the edges of his fingers down beneath her jaw and tilted her face up to look at him. The storm of emotions in her was nothing compared to that in him: anger and cold fury were there, and a lust for revenge after what the useless progenies of socialites and sycophants had done to his favourite. They had humiliated her, bodily and mentally, out in the open where other little cowards could watch and laugh.

"And where were you when this happened?" he asked gently.

"In the Transfiguration courtyard," she said in a choked mumble.

Her head nearly tilted toward his palm, perhaps to nuzzle it, before he took it away. He almost wished he hadn’t hurried to remove it… His eyes slid to her uniform: ruffled, tie out of place, buttons holding on but barely… She’d either gotten into a physical scuffle, or she’d spent the last few minutes tearing away at herself in frustration before she decided to come to him for help.

He was so close he could smell her, smell the scent of something sharp and woody like ginger — the Ardour Fly — and underneath it, quickly overtaking it, something fleshy and sweet, warm and a bit salty, something cloying that settled at the back of his throat.

"Look at me for a moment," he asked gently.

She did, gazing into his eyes bravely. He held her eyes for a quiet moment, then without warning put his palm right over her lower stomach.

"Aaaahhh!"

She gave a weak animal sound, something half-moan half-scream. She was nearly bending over at the feeling. Beneath his hand, Tom worked a bit of wandless magic to confirm the state of her insides. As he suspected: swollen, throbbing, overworked, and underloved. He inhaled sharply in sympathy as the sensations coursed through him, before he quickly took his hand away.

He didn’t often have the opportunity to examine the effects of aphrodisiacs on their victims, although he had sold his fair share while at Borgin and Burkes. He never liked these dirty tricks out of principle, although a means to an end was a means to an end… But seeing their effects now on her, his favourite student, his flesh and blood, he felt far less forgiving.

She clung to her waist protectively — his hand had been warm enough that she felt it through her clothes, and it pained her in that way an unfulfilled desire does.

"Please, Professor Riddle," she whimpered, sounding on the verge of tears. "I can’t take it, please tell me you have a cure for it…"

Of course, there was no cure for Ardour Fly at Hogwarts. Those were rare and expensive. Perhaps Nurse Blainey could help her with the symptoms by means of some antipyretic potions, at least until they could have something actually useful delivered to the castle. But the only cure they had on hand, so to speak, was to let the aphrodisiac fulfil its purpose.

"Alright," he sighed, mostly to himself. He could do this. It was a legitimate concern. It could even be an illegitimate concern, because anyway, nobody was going to find out, he’d make sure of that.

"Oh thank you so much, please, it hurts, it hurts..."

"What hurts?" he asked coolly, looking in her eyes again. "Tell me exactly what it is that hurts."

She stared at him dumbly for a moment, then realised he was actually waiting for her to say it.

"My... my..."

She bit her lip and closed her eyes, completely humiliated by the situation but dizzy from the effect of the Ardour Fly.

"My... intimate parts," she finally said, finding a term that was polite enough to say in the presence of a Professor.

"I see..." he whispered, his voice a little breathless now too above the anger he felt at the situation and his lingering anxieties. I can do this. "Show me where it hurts you."

Her soul left her body. She would have collapsed if she weren’t frozen stiff. She looked into his eyes, but there was no playfulness there. He was treating her as seriously, as clinically, as the victim of a poisoning… and it drove her dizzy with desire. It was at that point she realised she made a mistake going for help to the youngest and most handsome professor in the school.

But he didn’t seem any more amused by it than she was. He levelled at her the same stern gaze with which he expected them to hand in their homework, only now his voice was warmer and much close, and it was just the two of them, and he wasn’t asking for a roll of parchment but for her to lift her skirt.

Or did he prefer that she bend over?

The aphrodisiac was twisting not only her senses, but also her sense, and she found her mind going in the most depraved and humiliating directions. But he hadn’t meant it like that, did he? She genuinely was in pain, and her most dear Professor was offering to help. It made sense, it made sense...

After a few moments during which she switched between fighting with herself and looking into his dark eyes, she brought her hands to the edges of her skirt, and lifted it. She showed herself to him.

Tom’s icy gaze slid from her flushed face, down. Her panties were black with a lace flourish, and could barely contain her. She had been leaking down herself, the top of her thighs damp and shining in the candlelight, her folds swollen and visibly throbbing, the very material moving gently with a pulse that matched her heartbeat. And the scent of her, pure and innocent and aroused, became that much stronger now.

Tom stared at her with an intensity unlike anything he has ever felt before, and yet his composure betrayed nothing. It was only his stillness and the time he took to look at her, to drink his fill, that hinted at anything selfish at all. But inwardly, his senses were gripped by an unspeakable desire, a mixture of lust and pain and anger and something else, something that made his stomach churn at the mere thought of it.

His breath was slow and heavy as he spoke.

"You poor girl," he whispered. "What do you think should be done with those boys?"

Her lips parted in wonder at the turn in conversation. That was the last thing she expected from her Professor... to ask for her opinion. It made her realise how little she knew him...

"Punish them," she said with shaky anger. "Give them detention for the rest of the year or humiliate them or let me hex them or... I don't know, but I want them punished."

He smiled, feeling proud and oddly protective of her. That’s my girl, slithered a traitorous thought.

"Rest assured, I will punish them," he said with delight. "Not just detention, but much, much more."

He stared down at her, taking in the entire sight before him, a genuine look of affection in his eyes as he stared at her, an unspoken admiration. Her skirt was still held up in her trembling hands, her eyes were fixed on his, expectant and pleading and so, so obedient… But as he merely watched and said nothing else, she began to cover herself again.

"Thank you, Sir," she smiled, feeling so grateful she could cry.

It moved her beyond what he could know, to feel protected... Nobody had ever made her feel that way, not any of the other distracted teachers nor her fairweather friends and certainly not her parents.

"Um... so…" she asked with a blush. "Do you have a... treatment for the Ardour Fly, Sir? Can you help me?"

He grinned at that, seeming unhappy and excited at the same time, but also oddly… caring.

"Yes, Adara. I will help you."

She smiled at hearing it, as he expected. She trusted him completely.

Don’t get carried away, Tom thought to himself. Don’t let it go to your head.

He held her gaze, still smiling, and spoke in what he tried to make his most soothing, his most encouraging and reassuring tone. The irony was he hoped she’d gotten a hefty enough dose of aphrodisiac to even accept the treatment he was about to offer.

"There is only one treatment for the Ardour Fly we have available to us. It is a… procedure, but a well-tested method. It is, in fact, the recommended treatment. Do you understand?"

"I think so, Sir…"

She didn’t.

"I agree to help you, because I know you’re a good student and you deserve better than this, and I can only imagine what you must be going through right now… But it will take a considerable amount of… fortitude and… tolerance from your side."

"Alright, Sir," she said, looking up into his dark eyes.

She wanted to be brave for him, she wanted to be worthy of his praise and his help and his confidence, but most of all she wanted to show how grateful he was that he could help her. No, most of all she wanted something else…

"Good girl," he whispered, his smile tilting intimately.

A shiver ran up and down her spine at hearing it. She’d never been called that, and to hear Professor Riddle say it to her made her weak.

"You’ll need to lie down for your treatment," he said, then pointed to the far right of the room. "Go there, on the sofa."

It was an old and battered thing upholstered in green velvet that had worn away in places, but it looked to her like an operating table as she approached. She looked behind her as Professor Riddle followed, his arms politely behind his back. She didn’t see him take any equipment or potions, which made her wonder what this treatment was…

She sat on it, almost experimentally, letting herself gingerly on the cushion, but even that pressure was too much. Her head tilted back and she frowned with pleasure-pain at the intense sensation of having her tender parts all pressed together by her thighs.

"Now, lay on your back," he said as he came to a stop beside her.

She took her shoes off first, then came to rest on her back, trying to find a comfortable position. Her arms were stretched out and tense by her sides, and all she could look at was the shadowy stone ceiling.

Professor Riddle sat down on the floor, by her chest, and leisurely trailed his eyes up and down the length of her. She heard him sigh, but could not detect the precise feeling behind it.

"Do you trust me?" he asked quietly. "Do you trust me with every part of you?"

"Yes, Professor," she whispered almost so softly that he couldn't hear.

"Then listen carefully." His voice was almost gentle, almost. "I am going to kiss you now."

"Wh—!"

"Just one, soft, gentle kiss on your lips."

"Whatwhy?!" she asked in a tangle of emotions. She stared at him with wide, shocked eyes, her elbows braced against the sofa ready to lift her.

"I thought you said you trusted me," he said with a feline narrowing of the eyes.

"I d-do, but…"

"But what?"

She swallowed the knot in her throat and said nothing, conveying instead with her eyes and her lips and her frown all the things she couldn’t say: her worry, her fear, her despair for an ease to her pain, her mortification, and her frustrated desires… Tom understood her better than he wanted to.

"Ready?" he asked in a warm whisper as he leaned in.

His hand touched her cheek again, lightly enough that it was more of a tickle. She could smell ink on his fingers, and the salt from the sweat of his palms… She wanted to lick it clean.

"It’s just one kiss, Adara," he whispered in a last attempt to reassure her. "I’m not exactly asking for a huge sacrifice, am I?"

She wavered at that, her eyes dipping down shyly, sadly, even as his touch mollified her. She hesitated. "I've never been kissed, Sir..." she whispered.

Ah. So that’s why she was sad. This wasn't what she had imagined when she pictured her first kiss. She hoped to share it under quite different, more romantic, more conventional circumstances, if ever...

But at the same time, her body was screaming at her to accept, to assuage the aphrodisiac that was wreaking havoc on her nerves and her senses and her mind.

"You can still refuse," he said with a cocked brow, his fingers gentling her cheek with slow caresses.

She even felt a hint of guilt slip between her nerves... Professor Riddle was willing to help her, and here she was, stalling, fearing him, having doubts... He felt her hesitation.

"Don't worry, it will be a simple, gentle kiss. I will endeavour to make it positively sterile. Alright?"

She couldn’t look at him, but she nodded.

Tom leaned in even further and caressed her from her jaw to her chin in one long hungry lick of a stroke, looking into her eyes even as hers avoided him — deep and dark and lovely… He breathed in, breathed her in, for a moment feeling as if something of each of their own could merge into one being. He didn’t like that feeling, it felt like surrender.

"Do you trust me?" he asked in a huskier voice than he intended.

She looked up at him, pleading silently for him to be for her what he had been the whole time she was his student: her comfort, her consolation, her support, more than anyone else had been.

"I do trust you, Sir," she said with a choked voice, her throat tight with unspilled tears.

"There’s a good girl," he whispered, smiling down at her.

He could see her eyes growing dark at that, could see her breathing in panting breaths even worse than before, her knees coming up to offer her some comfort, to expose her to the cool air of the room and calm her aching parts… His eyes had that same smouldering look in them, but mixed in was the intense desire to prove to Adara that he could help her, comfort and protect her.

With the very tip of his index tilting her chin up, Tom leaned in and kissed her lips. It was the gentlest kiss imaginable, a pressing of his mouth against hers, quiet and silent and patient, a simple display of affection — but his eyes bore into hers throughout, like he was searching through her thoughts, through her very soul.

She looked back into his eyes throughout while his lips pressed with a certain kind of care into her, as tender as a fallen leaf. The scent of his skin so close, the scent of his clothes, the feeling of his warm lips and his cold finger, all made her feel a strange new feeling for her professor — or perhaps, it was not so new, she had just tried to suppress it because it was so indecent, so unworthy of him, and of her.

As he pulled away, he didn’t miss her little tongue slipping out to lick the taste of him off her. He smiled as he circled her chin with his thumb.

"How do you feel?" he whispered.

"The same? I mean, t-thank you, Sir..." she said, a little breathless. Her mind was still spinning from what he had just done for her. "But... It... it still hurts," she whined.

"Hmmm? Oh, yes. That wasn’t part of the treatment."

"What?"

"The ‘treatment’ comes next. I’m going to have to give you an orgasm. It just didn’t seem courteous without kissing your lips first."

#Tom Riddle #Tom Riddle fanfiction #Tom Riddle imagine #Tom Riddle x Reader #Tom Riddle x OC #Harry Potter #Harry Potter fic #sswallow;fanfics #sswallow;made a thing #fanfic;ardour #Tom Riddle smut

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popcornpoppin · 2 years

Text

Asking permission - f. o.

pairing: finnick odair x fem!reader

word count: 7.8k+

warnings: sinful s m u t (18+++!!!!!!), swearing, sexist words, breeding kink/unprotected sex, slight dub-con?, possible cnc (not my intention but it can read that way), brat/brat taming, mention of murderous thoughts, tiny bit of degradation, jealousy, blood kink, overstimulation, edging, cockwarming, rope bunny/rigger, possessiveness, orgasm denial, light choking, light exhibitionism, daddy kink if you squirt- i mean squint*, WE´RE GETTING IT ALL TODAY BABES

prompts: "I own your mind, body and soul darling, remember who makes you scream.", "Let me show you who your real god is.", “If you want this, you’re gonna have to ask me. Nicely.”, “Bite me harder. Sink your teeth into my flesh.”, “If you keep making those sounds I won’t be able to stop myself”

a/n: this is part 1 of @andvys birthday gift/surprise so a happy birthday to my favorite, pretty girl!! i hope you have the best day celebrating, baby. i wish i could celebrate properly with you my love but for now this will have to do. i really, really hope you enjoy it, it´s been killing me not being able to tell you about it. so everyone reading this: go wish her a happy birthday!! uhm this is very long like finnick so have fun and as always remember to let me know what you thought <3

PS: in this for convenience i have them wear regular clothes rather than those gastly coveralls/jumpsuits that everyone in district 13 has to wear so it's slightly au but not really.

You woke up with a dumb smile on your face, your legs still trembling a bit from last night. Your hair was a mess and your cheeks still tear stained. Lightly tracing your neck you were sure it was covered in hickeys. Even though you couldn't feel them you knew you'd eventually be greeted with them in the mirror. Carefully tilting your head upwards you were met with the sleeping face of your boyfriend, who´s heartbeat was the only thing filling your ears as you laid with your head against his sculpted chest. You loved waking up first and getting to watch him in adoration as he slept, he always looked so at ease - so peaceful. His fluffy hair was slightly disheveled from your fingers gripping it tightly in the late hours of the night, a soft smile painted on his beautiful lips as he dreamt about his future with you. He looked otherworldly and you never grew tired of calling him yours.

Laying safely tucked into his side, with his strong arms wrapped around you, still made butterflies erupt in your stomach and you wished with all your might that you could stay with him like that all day. His bedroom in district 13 was like your own little safe haven. No one else had access to it or could disturb you there. You were free to admire and treasure each other, and share your love in whatever way you wanted. There wasn't any of the judgment or drama that you´d be met with outside of the bedroom door, only pure unadulterated bliss.

Wanting to get a head start on your morning and take a quick shower before you eventually had to leave for a meeting, you as slowly and unnoticeably as possible tried to shimmy your way out of Finnick´s arms; so as to not wake him. Your attempts proved futile though as you were met with his morning voice, that was even raspier than usual, and his arms tightening their grip around you.

“Where do you think you're going, pretty girl?”

His ocean green eyes met yours and like always your heart skipped a beat. He smiled at your lovestruck gaze and tucked some hair behind your ear as a soft chuckle vibrated through him. You could never tire of looking at his face, it was true that he looked like a Greek god but his eyes were still one of your favorite parts about him. You could drown in them over and over, they were so full of emotion and you loved how they gave you a small peek into his soul. Your favorite thing was to catch him in the act as he was staring at you when you were out among others. He'd look at you with the most lovestruck gaze you could imagine, his thoughts a million miles away - not registering a word anyone else was saying to him. It made you feel like you were the only person he saw, the only one that mattered in his eyes and he saw you brighter and more clearly than anything else in this world. And unbeknownst to you that was exactly how he saw you, just like you saw him.

“I´m sorry, I didn't mean to wake you” you replied softly, turning over on your stomach so you could properly face him and give his lips a short peck.

“No need to apologize, beautiful. I was already up, but I could feel those gorgeous eyes of yours admiring me; so I thought I'd pretend to be asleep for a bit longer” His smirk was cocky but his eyes were soft as he caressed your cheek. As always he was admiring you just as much as you were admiring him.

You playfully rolled your eyes before kissing his cheek and sitting up. Twisting a loose curl that was hanging down his forehead between your fingers, your eyes found his again “I was thinking of taking a shower, wanna join me?”

He grinned slyly up at you, his arms gripping your sides “No not yet, it's still early”. Normally he wouldn't have been able to pass up such an offer but today he had different plans.

He had a playful gaze, telling you that there was more intent behind his words. Picking up on his silent offer you leaned down, your lips pressing against his again; only this time rather than being short peck, it was a passionate and lingering kiss. You lightly bit his bottom lip, not hesitating to move your tongue into his mouth. He groaned against your lips, lifting himself up and leaning back on his elbows to easier meet your lips as he kissed you feverishly.

You made out in that position for a while before he pulled you on top of him and moved so his back could rest against the headboard. As your legs straddled him, your arms snaked around his neck so you could deepen the kiss. His hands moved all over you, exploring your naked body. You moaned into his mouth as his soft hands gripped your breasts, massaging them and occasionally flicking your nipples with his fingers.

“God I love this heavenly body of yours” he groaned, his hands moving down to your hips as his mouth covered your right tit.

At first he kissed all over your breast, sometimes leaving marks, before taking your nipple in his mouth and sucking on it. His hands slowly started moving your hips so you were grinding down on his exposed crotch. Feeling his cock against your slit made you whimper and as the heat grew inside of the pit of your stomach you knew you needed him inside of you desperately.

As Finnick moved onto your other tit, repeating his process, you started lining your entrance up with his cock. You teased your hole against his head, making you both moan in unison, but before you could lower yourself fully onto him, his hands moved to just below your ribs and lifted you off him. He softly placed you beside him before using his hands to push himself up and off the bed. You watched his back in confusion as he walked to the dresser to grab some clothes, leaving you horny and flustered on the bed.

You looked at his back with bewildered eyes and when he turned around, meeting your gaze, he only shrugged before saying “Come on, we need to get ready for the meeting”.

The whole thing made you question if what had just happened less than 2 minutes ago actually ever happened.

“We still have 30 minutes?” You exclaimed, the primal need inside of you going feral “Do you know what we could get done in that time?”

He chuckled deeply, a smile blooming on his face as his eyes scanned your shocked face in amusement. “I want us to get there before everyone else so we can get the best seats.” He answered plainly, walking over to you. He used his thumb to tilt your head up, swiftly pecking your lips before moving away again.

What the hell was he talking about? No one cared about where they sat during the meetings. Except for Plutarch and Coin, no one ever sat in the same place from one meeting to the next. Any other protests you had, however, died on your tongue as your boyfriend tossed you some clothes; before he headed over towards the bathroom door.

Grabbing the door handle he paused before he slowly turned around, one hand still on the handle. His eyes were dark and stern as they bore into yours “If you so much as think of playing with yourself I'm not touching you for a week” and with that he fully opened the door and entered the bathroom before shutting the door behind him.

Looking dumbfounded down at your clothes you sighed before moving the pile of clothes from your lap and pushing yourself off the bed. Shuffling through the small pile you found the thin, white thong Finnick had picked out for you. As you put on the underwear you examined the rest of the clothes he had tossed you. A pair of knee high socks, a skirt that stopped just above your knees, a cute - but pretty see-through - blouse, no bra.

After putting it all on, and fixing the blouse so your nipples were shining through as little as possible, you sat down on the edge of the bed and grabbed your hairbrush from the nightstand. You gently brushed through your rather frazzled hair, knowing that you´d encounter some knots after last night's activities. Finishing up with the brush, you combed your hands through your hair a couple of times to feel around for stray knots. Not finding any, you put the brush away and walked over to the mirror that hung over the dresser.

Looking yourself over in the mirror, you moved your hair to the side to see just how much of a mess Finnick had made on your neck. From your collarbone and up to your jaw you were covered in hickies, two smaller ones being right next to each other and forming a heart. The blouse only had a short collar, so it wouldn´t hide anything. Since the blouse was white and pretty new you didn't really feel like trying to cover up the hickies with makeup either. Many of your favorite blouses had been ruined by your makeup rubbing off and staining the collar. In the back of your head you wondered if that's exactly why Finnick had picked that one.

Your pondering was interrupted as Finnick emerged fully clothed from the bathroom. “You ready to go?”

You nodded briefly before heading towards him “Just let me go brush my teeth first”. You carefully squeezed past him to enter the bathroom, trying to ignore the fact that he was wearing the cologne that he knew drove you crazy.

Heading straight for the sink you lifted the lever, letting the water run as you grabbed your toothbrush and some toothpaste. As you watched yourself in the mirror brushing your teeth you couldn't help but think back to his words ´If you so much as think of playing with yourself I'm not touching you for a week´. It was tempting, you were alone in the bathroom and as long as you managed to stay quiet he'd never know any better. It would be nice not to have to sit through an entire meeting flustered and what if someone noticed the state you were in and commented on it? Moving your hand down and slipping it underneath your skirt you almost whimpered at the contact with your skin. You were already terribly worked up so it would be a quick affair and it would solve all of your current problems. You desperately needed some sort of release, and if Finnick wouldn't give it to you…

On the other hand, you weren't sure if it was worth the risk. If you did help yourself out, Finnick might get suspicious of the fact that you were suddenly more relaxed and not as needy anymore; and then he might realize what you´d done. The chances of him figuring it out were pretty high, he wasn´t dumb and sometimes it felt like he knew you better than you knew yourself. As you thought it over you came to the conclusion that he´d definitely know, so in the long run it wasn't worth it. Even just a few days without him was torture, he was insatiable and your need for him was inherent; there was too much at stake. Sighing, you decided against it and let your hand fall back to your side.

Spitting out the toothpaste and using the running water to rid yourself of any residue you turned off the faucet and put the toothbrush back into the holder. Re-entering the bedroom, you avoided Finnick's eyes completely - not wanting him to discern your inner turmoil. He raised an eyebrow at your odd behavior but didn´t question it.

When you had left the bedroom Finnick had spared no time grabbing your hand and interlinking your fingers with his. Finnick utilized the fact that your fingers were intertwined and pulled you into the meeting room. As you expected, no one else had arrived yet. Not a single team member was ever there earlier than 5 minutes before the meeting was supposed to start, but you decided against questioning Finnick; knowing it was futile anyway.

He dropped your hand as he fully entered the room, examining the chairs before choosing one in the middle of the table and pulling it out. You were about to sit down in the seat next to him when he made a sound of protest. You sent him a questioning look, your eyebrows furrowing in confusion when he patted his lap.

“We never finished what we started this morning darling” he rasped as a cocky smirk grew on his lips, knowing the effect his words had on you.

You quickly placed yourself in his lap, resting your back against his chest. The action made him chuckle.

“So eager” he purred, kissing just behind your ear as his hand started trailing your thigh and up your skirt.

You whimpered as his long, steady fingers hooked around your underwear and just slightly pulled it down. Pushing his hand down to your cunt, he cursed “Fuck baby, so wet for me already?”

You moaned as he started kissing your neck, two of his fingers slowly entering you. It was ecstasy and torture at the same time. Just as his fingers fully entered you, his thumb started rubbing agonizingly slow circles on your clit.

“Finnick” you whined, wanting him to pick up his pace.

“Patience honey” He chastised, making you groan in annoyance. He did however finally start moving his fingers, pushing them in and out of you.

“Fuck that´s where my fingers belong -” he murmured into your ear, kissing your earlobe. “- riiiight there” he smirked, curling his fingers as he found your sweet spot; making you moan loudly. The sound made Finnick stop his movements.

“Naughty girl, you want everyone to hear how well my fingers fuck you don´t you baby? What if someone were to walk past and decided to come in and stop us? You don't want that, do you?” He whispered as he slid his free hand up and wrapped it around your mouth.

Once he had a tight grip around you he started moving and curling his fingers inside of you again - the only difference being that your screams were now muffled by his hand covering your mouth. He pumped in and out of you at a rapid pace and you could feel yourself approaching your high. Finnick could also tell, by how your breathing picked up, and as a result added a third finger and picked up the pace even more. He continued vigorously pushing his three fingers in and out of you, making tears of pleasure start streaming down your face.

You let out a long whine as you felt yourself struggle to hold it in anymore. Just as you felt yourself reach your orgasm, the blissful haze starting to cover your eyes, Finnick pulled his fingers out of you and let the hand that was covering your mouth fall to his side.

“What the actual fuck Finnick” you complained, turning your head over your shoulder to face him as your jaw drapped open in shock.

“What?” He said feigning innocence, happily licking your juices off his fingers.

“I was so close” you groaned, sending him an annoyed look.

“I know” he answered matter-of-factly, flashing you a grin.

“You should've let me come” you argued.

“Hmm” he pondered, pressing his thumb to your lips “No, not yet pretty girl”

“Why” you whined, letting your head fall back against his shoulder in defeat. He just smirked, loving the sounds you were making and how much he was affecting you.

“I was thinking you´d maybe rather have my cock in you hmm?” he replied, looking down at you with a toothy grin.

Your eyes widened as you lifted your head from his shoulder and turned it towards him again, scanning his face to see if he was serious. “Yes, yes please. Fuck, please baby” you practically begged, but you were so desperate for release that you didn´t care.

“I figured” he smirked, planting a sweet kiss to your lips before starting to unbutton his pants and pulling down his zipper.

He lifted you up a bit so he could shimmy his pants and boxers just far enough down for his erect cock to spring free. Before you had time to react he planted you down on him, forcing you to take all of him at once as his hands still tightly gripped your hips. A loud hiss left your lips at the sudden contact but on account of his fingers already having stretched you out a bit, it didn't take long for you to get used to his size. Once you had adjusted to the new position, you started gently rolling your hips as you moved up and down on him.

Finnick tskd and dug his fingers even farther into your hips, holding them still. “No moving” he scolded, harshly slapping your ass with a flat hand to really assert his point.

“Why the hell not?” you groaned, growing exasperated.

However you never got an answer as the door was suddenly pulled open, revealing Plutarch and Coin, with the rest of the team entering not long after.

Coin raised an eyebrow at your position in Finnick's lap but made no other comment than a small huff before walking to her seat. Peeta buried a snort in his hand, the cheeky bastard.

Soon everyone was placed around the table and the meeting went by as it normally would, if anyone had any comments on the fact that you weren't sitting in your own chair they kept it to themselves. Luckily for you your skirt was covering everything, so it just looked like you were sitting normally in Finnick's lap with nothing unseemly going on.

What no one else in the room knew was how torturous it felt for you. Not moving was driving you insane, especially since you were already riled up from earlier. You wondered if you'd be able to shimmy unnoticeably just to get a little bit of friction, maybe you could play it off as if you were just adjusting your position in his lap to sit more comfortably. As if he could read your mind Finnick leaned in close to your ear.

“Don't even think about it” he warned, his voice barely above a whisper. His warm breath fanned your ear and sent shivers down your spine. You swallowed harshly, his hands gripping your hips even tighter to restrain you. How were you ever going to survive this?

The meeting droned on and on and felt like it had no end. Your legs almost gave out once it was over and you had to lift yourself off of Finnick. Him being the only other person to know your dirty little secret was right next to your side though, putting a helpful and steadying hand to your back. It was a small gesture, not one that would raise any suspicions; meaning that everyone else was just as blissfully unaware as they had been previously.

Once your legs felt steady enough you grabbed Finnick´s hand and practically ran back to his bedroom, not being able to wait a minute longer. He had chuckled whilst you dragged him along behind you, finding your eagerness very amusing.

The second both of you were through the door and Finnick had shut it behind him you grabbed his sweater, bunching it up in your fist as you pulled his lips to yours; keeping him as close to you as possible. Walking backwards as you kissed him, you used your hold on his sweater to pull him with you to the bed.

Finnick however stopped moving, using his strength advantage over you to force you to stop as well. He carefully removed your hands from his sweater, letting them drop to your sides, making you look up at him.

“You're such a needy little slut aren't you princess?” He chuckled, playing with a stray lock of your hair.

“Only for you” you grinned playfully, hoping that his choice of words meant that you'd get your way.

“Are you sure about that? I saw how Castor looked at you during that meeting. Thinking he could touch what isn't his” His eyes hardened, along with his grip around the strand of hair.

“W-what?” you spluttered, your eyes widening in shock and your brows furrowing in confusion.

“Don´t play dumb baby, you know how irresisteble you are.” His eyes darkened as he scanned your face in thought “I think I need to remind you who you really belong to”

“Oh god…” you gulped, earning a small chuckle from him.

He leaned in closer, his lips and raspy voice mere inches from your ear "Let me show you who your real god is"

And with that he pushed you down on the bed and got down on his knees in front of you. Finnick used his wide shoulders to push your legs apart before he buried himself between your legs. Your fingers instinctively tangled into his hair as he started kissing and marking your inner thighs. You couldn't help but let out a scream when his tongue curled around your clit, the ball of nerves shooting electricity through your body.

Normally you were better at containing the sounds he got out of you but all the buildup and edging had you nearly combusting from just his tongue barely touching you. You mewled as he licked a long stripe up your slit, his nose brushing against your clit before his mouth found its way back to it. He continued to suck on your clit with such vigor it made your hips buck.

Tugging on his hair you ground yourself against his face, needing him as close as possible as you felt yourself already approaching your high.

“Who does this tight pussy belong to?” he grunted from between your legs.

“F-fuck, it belongs to you Finnick” you barely managed to get out between whimpers as you rode his face. A particularly loud moan leaving your lips as he moved from your clit and dipped his tongue inside of your entrance; his thumb moving to your clit to replace his tongue. As his tongue moved inside of you, his thumb rubbed tight circles on your clit; making you arch your back to meet his mouth.

“That's right baby. Fuck, you taste incredible. I could have my tongue buried in you like this all day” He cursed, pressing open-mouth kisses to your throbbing cunt before burying himself inside of you again.

You were seeing stars and knew you wouldn't last much longer, even though you desperately wished to prolong it all and for the euphoric feeling to not fade away.

“I can't wait to feel your delicious cum on my tongue before I bury my cock deep inside of you” Finnick moaned against you, sending ripples through your body.

His words made something snap inside of your brain. Using all the self restraint you could muster you used your grip on his hair to move his face out from between your legs. Exploiting the confusion he was feeling you got up on your legs and started walking towards the bathroom before he had time to stop you. As you walked you desperately tried to hide the fact that your legs almost buckled under you and once you reached the bathroom door you clung to the handle for support.

“Where are you going?” He panted, his breath heavy as he looked at you in shock.

Ignoring him you slowly started pushing down the handle.

“Come back over here baby” he pushed out between breaths, the phrase coming out as almost a whine.

“Hmm” you pretended to consider his words “No”.

“Y/n, I´m not joking get the fuck over here” he growled, growing annoyed with your antics.

“Make me” you spat back, wanting to get back at him for how much he teased you earlier.

“Okay, that's it you little brat” He quickly got on his legs and stalked over to you, roughly grabbing your sides. Before you had time to react he had lifted you up and thrown you from the bathroom door and onto the bed.

Your back bounced against the mattress and you felt your head start to spin. As you laid on the bed almost paralyzed in shock he walked over to the dresser and rifled through one of the drawers.

“I've had it up to here with you-” he mumbled as he stopped rifling through the clothes when he found what he was looking for.

Pulling out some rope he started chuckling as he continued “- thinking you can tease me and walk away… acting like you make the rules here- but you're oh so wrong” His eyes were pitch black as they bore into yours.

He walked slowly over to you, eying you like you were his prey. “Hold out your hands for me” he demanded. You eyed him wearily, not knowing if you had heard him correctly. “I believe I told you to do something” he pointed out, sending you a warning and impatient look.

Not wanting to tempt fate you did as he said, putting your hands against each other and holding them out in front of you. He roughly grabbed your hands and started wrapping the rope around them, tying it into a tight knot; leaving no room for you to protest. He pulled your hands above your head and tied the rope to the bedpost. Tugging the rope to make sure it was properly in place he hummed satisfied. He then pulled your socks and skirt off before grabbing your blouse and tearing it in half, discarding it somewhere else in the room. Once he was pleased with his work his eyes found yours again.

“If you want this, you’re gonna have to ask me. Nicely.”

“And what if I don't want this?” You challenged, even though it was hard to make it sound like you meant it as the words held no real merit behind them. You also didn´t have the upper hand in the situation seeing as you were half naked and tied up.

He chuckled darkly, his fingers starting to stroke between your folds almost making you spasm as a result “You sure about that sweetheart? Because your body is telling me otherwise”

You whimpered, tugging on the restraints as you tried to use your body to rub his fingers against your cunt. “Please baby, I´m sorry okay? I´ll make it up to you, just.. I need you” you pleaded.

“Save your sorrys, I want to hear you beg for it” he answered plainly, walking away from the bed as he started undressing. You watched his movements closely, almost drooling when his back muscles were revealed to you. Once he had shed all his clothes and put them in a neat little pile, he sat down in the armchair in the corner of the room.

Watching your exposed form he started stroking his large cock. “Well?” He raised an eyebrow, waiting for you to start begging.

Watching him stroke himself as he silently moaned your name was making it hard for you to form a coherent sentence.

“Please baby” you groaned.

He laughed a hearty laugh “I'm sure you can do better than that”

You sighed, your mind not finding the words he wanted to hear. “Finnick” you whined, dragging out his name “I need you”.

No reaction.

If you wanted him, you really needed to show him how desperate you were. “Finnick, baby, please get over here. I want you. You´re the only one that can make me feel this way and I really need you inside of me right now. I don't know what I´d do without you and I need you close to me, always.” You looked at him with the biggest doe eyes you could muster, you knew you were laying it on ridiculously thick; but you had to.

He didn't say anything but your words still seemed to do the trick because his hand stilled and he rose from the chair. Reaching the bed in just a few steps he climbed on top of you, easily covering your body with his. He trailed kisses from your shoulder and all the way down to your mound. Reaching your underwear he took the thong in his mouth and used his teeth to rip it off. Once it was off he opened his mouth and let the dripping thong drop into his hand. He reached the hand holding the thong out in front of your mouth.

“Open” he commanded.

You did as told and opened your mouth, letting him place the ripped thong in your mouth to muffle the sounds you'd soon be making.

“Good girl” He praised, pressing a kiss to your stomach. “Now I think it's time for that taste I didn't get earlier”

Quickly burying his face in your cunt again, he cursed “Fucking hell you´re soaked baby” pressing a kiss to your mound he admired your dripping cunt “All this just for me huh?” He smirked, biting your inner thighs lovingly.

You whined but the sound, as expected, came out muffled. You once again tried to move your cunt closer to his face, wanting more pleasure, the action making the rope dig uncomfortably into your skin.

“Don´t worry pretty girl, I´m going to take good care of you” Finnick hummed, grinning at your impatience as he pressed his hand down against your stomach to keep you from moving. Once he was sure you were completely still he moved his face to your slit again, pressing the thumb on his free hand to your clit and burying his tongue inside of you.

You bit down harshly on the thong as his thumb rubbed and pinched your clit and his tongue curled inside of you. The heat pooling in your stomach grew quickly and you didn't know how long you´d be able to last.

“Now I know you´re already riled up from earlier but I don't want you to come before I allow you to okay?” he looked up at you, awaiting your response.

You meekly nodded, not wanting to tempt fate any longer.

His tongue moved in and out of you at a steady pace as he added more pressure to your clit. You tried to buck against his face, but his hand on your stomach made it impossible to move. Pulling his tongue out of you abruptly, Finnick let two fingers scissor into you instead - his mouth going back to your clit again. He sucked again and again as his fingers moved rapidly inside of you.

As he ate you out his eyes looked up at you, finding your eyes shut in pleasure he cleared his throat. Your eyes opened slowly and drifted down to his.

“I want your eyes on me at all times baby” he explained before enveloping your clit with his mouth and picking up the pace with his fingers.

You screamed against the gag and roughly pulled on the restraints as he pumped his fingers in and out of you; the pressure in your stomach became unbearable. You felt like you were going blind, your body feeling numb as you tried to keep yourself from orgasming. Sensing your struggle Finnick stopped his movement on your clit and pulled his fingers out of you. He licked your slit and tasted your juices before he moved his mouth closer to your entrance so you could spill on his tongue. His thumb started roughly pinching your pulsing clit as he awaited the salty liquid to spill out of you.

“It's okay. Come for me beautiful” Finnick rasped out, letting his tongue slip inside of you again. At his words you came violently all over his tongue and face as you bit down on the panties still in your mouth. He kept rubbing your clit and eating you out throughout your high.

Your chest was heaving and your legs shook as you tried to steady your breath. Finnick hummed and moaned at the taste of you on his lips before moving his face to yours.

“For this next part I want to hear all your pretty sounds” He smiled, pulling the gag out of your mouth before pressing a sweet kiss to your lips so you could taste yourself on his tongue. He cupped your face with his free hand, softly rubbing your cheek as he pressed his lips against yours over and over again- the salty taste coating the inside of your mouth.

“Feel how good you taste baby? Now do you understand why I can´t get enough of you?”

You were unable to give him a proper answer so you settled for a hum, still too out of breath and your mind too mushy to form coherent thoughts. As Finnick tossed the destroyed thong somewhere in the room and moved away from you, you let your focus drift to calming your breath. You slowly inhaled through your nose and softly exhaled through your mouth a few times, the action steadying your breath and normalizing your breathing pattern quickly.

Your eyes drifted down Finnick´s chest and to his cock, following your eyes Finnick let out a small chuckle before he turned stern. “Before you get my cock inside of you, I want you to earn it”

Your face looked like a question mark, what did he even mean? Thanks to the rope you couldn't touch him and it also made it so you could hardly move at all. Finnick noticing your confusion chuckled again “Don´t worry, love, I´m going to help you”

Moving closer, Finnick grabbed your hips and lifted you up, placing you softly down on his thigh “Now, I want you to imagine that you're riding my cock, okay?”

You meekly nodded, the restraints still making it difficult since you couldn't hold Finnick´s chest. You tried as best you could to roll your hips against his thigh, Finnick using his hands on your hips to help move and guide you. It was a foreign feeling but it felt good and you could feel the butterflies erupting in your stomach.

“Fuck, that´s it my love. A little faster for daddy now”

You let out a loud moan as you picked up your pace, your juices spreading all over his thigh. Finnick grunted before grabbing your face with one hand and pulling you into a deep kiss.

The body hair on his thigh slightly tickled your mound, his thigh pressing deeper into your slit with each movement. Finnick slowly moved the hand that was cupping your face down to your chest as his other hand continued helping you move. You groaned as he cupped your breast, gently massaging it as he matched your pace.

“You´re doing so well for me darling”

You whimpered into the kiss, the passion burning feeling inside of your stomach threatening to burst at any moment. Finnick moved his hand over to your other breast, wanting to give it the same attention he had given to the other one. With some help from Finnick you picked up your pace once again, moving as fast as you could as you rapidly approached your high.

“Fuck, baby this feels amazing” you moaned, the pleasure overtaking you.

The more you moved, the more you could hear yourself hit the juices you had already left on his thigh. Your breathing picked up, coming out ragged as you tried your best to keep from coming too fast. Goosebumps spread over your body as Finnick moved his hand down your stomach and to your slit, coating two of his fingers with your juices. Once he was happy with the amount he moved his fingers to your lips. You quickly covered them with your mouth, snaking your tongue around them and licking them clean before starting to move your head up and down. Finnick´s breathing hitched as your head moved up and down on his fingers, your eyes in deep eye contact with his. You bobbed your head around his fingers as you struggled to keep up the pace of your hips.

“Come on my thigh angel” Finnick grunted, moving his fingers out of your mouth and wrapping them around your throat.

He gently squeezed your throat, pushing you over the edge. As you came once again, Finnick helped keep moving as you rode out your high - his name spilling from your lips over and over again. As you calmed down, Finnick moved his chest closer to you, letting you rest against it. He gave you some time to settle before he lifted you off of him and gently leaned you against the headboard.

As your breathing calmed again your eyes drifted to Finnick, finding him standing on his knees as he pumped himself in his hand. Finnick, catching your eyes on him, reached his hand forward to you.

“Spit” he commanded. You did as told and watched in bewilderment as he rubbed the spit over his hardened dick.

“N-no Finnick, no more, I´m too sensitive” your voice shook as you spoke and you anxiously eyed his every move. You wanted his cock inside of you, you had wanted it all day but now you didn't think you could handle it. Your legs closed themselves out of instinct, still shaking from coming twice. Finnick didn't answer you and made no comment on the action before moving your legs apart, his cock sliding against your thigh as he moved closer to you.

He used his head to tease your entrance whilst both of his hands cupped your breasts, massaging them and occasionally pinching your nipples. He groaned at the sounds you let out, his lips kissing your neck and biting your sweet spot with just enough pressure to not draw blood. Flicking your nipples with his thumbs he started marking the parts of your neck that weren't already covered in hickeys.

As he pressed himself against you, you could feel the head of his cock just nearly dipping inside of you before it moved away again; his shaft slipping between your folds. His lips found yours, his tongue sliding against your bottom lip in a silent plea for entrance. You opened your lips for him, letting him devour you as his cock slowly slipped inside of you.

“Oh fucking christ you´re tight” he moaned, his large cock filling you to the brim and stretching your walls “God baby, if you get any more perfect I don´t know how long I´m going to last”

You moaned into his mouth, your fingers gripping the ends of his hair. “If anyone here is perfect it's you” you praised.

At that he groaned and pushed deeper inside of you. Moving his hand to press against your stomach he whimpered “Fuck baby, I can literally feel how deep I am inside of you”.

Taking your hand in his he moved it to your stomach, pressing it down softly and putting his on top of yours before moving his cock deep inside of you “Feel that?”

You let out a mix between a loud whine and a moan, making Finnick groan and bury his head in your neck as he continued his steady pace inside of you. “Fuck baby if you keep making those sounds I won’t be able to stop myself”

You whimpered before lightly biting down on his shoulder, wanting to bury the animalistic sounds that were spilling from your lips. The action made a sound erupt from Finnick that you'd never heard before

“Fuck” he moaned, picking up his pace inside of you and going even deeper “Bite me harder. Really sink your teeth into my flesh.”

You were a bit hesitant, not wanting to hurt him, but complied anyway. Putting some more pressure on his shoulder with your teeth you quickly felt a metallic taste coating your lips. Blood. Easing the pressure and swiping your tongue over the small wound you noted how you actually liked the taste of it, Finnick was clearly enjoying it too as he moaned and pounded even harder into you.

“Again” he ordered with a panting breath. This time you didn´t hesitate as you moved your head to his neck, leaving soft kisses on your way there. You slowly licked his sweet spot before kissing it and biting down until you once again felt his blood mix with your tongue. “Fuck you´re hot” he moaned, making you whimper. You loved hearing the sounds he made on account of you, if it spurred you on normally you had to be drenched right now.

Easing your pressure on his neck, you lapped up the remaining blood, pressing sweet kisses to the wound. Exploiting your closeness to his neck you started marking it with hickeys so it soon was matching yours.

Finnick groaned, pounding into you even faster. “I should've killed Castor for the way he looked at you during that meeting. If you weren't placed so nicely on my cock I don´t know if I would´ve been able to control myself”

You had never heard Finnick talk like this, it was shocking and a bit scary but it made the warm feeling pooling in your stomach even more apparent and you could feel even more of your juices run down your inner thighs.

"I own your mind, body and soul darling, remember who makes you scream." Without warning he removed himself from inside of you before slamming into you again, entering you fully all at once. You loudly screamed and clung to him for dear life as your nails scratched all over his back. You could hear your juices squelch around his cock as he buried his cock deep inside of you.

You let your head fall back against the headboard, your eyes roll into your head in ecstasy

“Eyes on me, pretty girl” Finnick grunted, tilting your head back towards him “I want you to look at me as I come inside of you”

You whimpered as he spilled inside of you, his warm seed coating your walls. Finnick kept pounding into you helping you reach your own release, whilst murmuring “My perfect goddess” over and over again.

“F-fuck Finn” You moaned as your cum mixed with his, covering both of you as it spilled out of your entrance.

Finnick started gently moving himself out of you. Once he was fully pulled out you sunk down into the mattress, completely exhausted. He started pressing soft kisses all over your body as he repeated how good you had been. He caressed your skin as he kissed a long trail down your chest and to your thighs. Slowly he let his tongue slide over the cum that was still covering your skin. He hummed as he lapped it up, his tongue moving closer to your cunt and teasing your entrance; making you involuntarily moan his name.

“N-no more” you panted, your chest heaving.

“You keep saying that honey but the sounds you´re making are telling me something completely different” he pointed out “I know what you want, baby, better than anyone else - even yourself. I know you´ve got one more round in you..”

You whined but didn't protest when he buried his face in your cunt once again. His nose tickled your clit as his tongue delved deep inside of you. He lapped and lapped as if he was starved of your taste, even though he had devoured it earlier this evening.

Your thighs clamped around him as he ate you out, shaking due to the exhaustion. Your fingers were gripping his hair so tightly you were sure you were almost ripping it out, but Finnick made no complaints. He just kept moaning your name as your taste coated every inch of his mouth and your juices spread all over the lower half of his face.

He licked and licked, making all kinds of sounds erupt from you. He loved the sounds you made and the power he held over your body. His warm breath fanning your cunt, as he devoured every inch of you, made shivers run down your spine. The heat inside of you felt like the lava inside of a volcano ready to erupt.

“Fuck Finnick, keep going” you moaned, pulling his face even closer to your cunt.

At your words he gripped your thighs and buried himself deeper in you. It didn't take you long to reach your high and you were teetering at the edge waiting for permission to fall off it.

“Finnick-” You whined, letting him know how close you were.

“Come on, let me taste you beautiful” he hummed, eating you out with even more passion than before.

Your cum flowed out of you at a great pace and the parts that didn't go directly into Finnick´s mouth covered his face. Removing himself from your slit he let you get a good look at him before he dragged his hand across it, getting all of it on his hand before he licked it up; groaning in pleasure as he did.

Once his fingers were clean Finnick climbed off the bed and walked over to the headboard. He gently untied the rope from your wrists, tracing the marks in your skin softly before kissing all over them.

“Wait here” he said softly before disappearing off into the bathroom. When he remerged he was carrying a wet rag in his hands. He gently washed your thighs, looking up every once in a while to make sure you were comfortable. You were exhausted and in a state of euphoria unlike any other. As you laid with your head on the pillow, looking up into the ceiling you swore you could still see stars cloud your gaze.

Once he was finished cleaning you up and had discarded the rag in the laundry basket, Finnick climbed back into bed with you. Wrapping his arms around you, he pulled you close to his chest and started kissing you gently all over.

“You did so well for me” he praised as he moved his hands up to your face again, combing his fingers gently through your hair.

“I love you” you mumbled as you felt your eyes drift shut.

“I love you too honey. Fuck I never tire of hearing you say that” he replied, kissing your temple as his free hand started tracing circles on your cheek.

“Me neither” you murmured happily.

The hand that was cupping your cheek suddenly started trailing down the rest of your body before it started gently swiping over and caressing your ass. “Baby?” Finnick asked softly.

“Hmm?” you hummed to show you were still listening, even as you buried your face deeper into his chest - ready to drift off to sleep.

“Are you too sore for round two?”

#finnick odair #popcornpoppin #finnick odair smut #finnick odair x reader #finnick odair x you #finnick odair imagine #finnick x reader #finnick x you #finnick x y/n #finnick odair x y/n #finnick imagines #thg #thg imagine #thg imagines #thg smut #hunger games imagine #thg catching fire #thg mockingjay

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dearestxiao · 2 months

Text

the color blue: neon [part 2] | yandere xiao x reader, yandere venti x reader

synopsis: the days until you finally meet your penpal has been ticking by so quickly, but with a new tutor, a clingy roommate, and a professor who seems to only want the worst for you, it's hard to keep track of time. WARNINGS: DARK CONTENT, yandere characters, creepy xiao is creepy (lots of potentially uncomfortable thoughts from his perspective), heavily implied stalking, possessiveness, manipulation, dub-con touching, student-teacher dynamic, age gap (reader is 21+ and zhongli is 27+, feel free to adjust as need be). let me know if I need to add anything! reader is gender neutral.

wc: 10.7k

author notes: I wanted to first say thank you for the wait, and I hope that everybody is able to enjoy the changes and edits I’ve made to the story. I also wanted to say thank you to the mutuals who had helped me create the original version of the story. it has been a long time since then, and I’m not entirely sure if they’re still active (OTZ), so I’m not sure if they would still like to be tagged but I am forever grateful to them. this is the last exposition heavy chapter, as well as my last read edit/re-upload of a chapter, so the next few chapters will be much meatier with new content!!! again, thank you so much for the wait. love you all! as always, reblogs are very appreciated if enjoyed and if possible!

ᡕᠵ᠊ᡃ່࡚ࠢ࠘ ⸝່ࠡࠣ᠊߯᠆ࠣ࠘ᡁࠣ࠘᠊᠊ࠢ࠘𐡏” ♡♡♡ [part 1]

dark content. minors do not interact. do not repost/link.

from xiao's room, there's a perfect view of the town a bit away from campus that greets him everytime he steps inside. it's a gorgeous sight, which is something he could admit, even though he didn’t choose the place himself, one anyone would be grateful for. the town is bright and bustling even still, and it’s only now starting to dim down. it’s getting late into the night, with flashy lights and beautiful architecture and homey buildings, and so many people, people, people.

there are still families on an outing, and cute couples going on dates. shop owners sweeping around their store. he can see as the everyday salaryman walks back home, accompanying the students on their own way home from classes; he can see so many lives being lived from his isolated little tower.

and yet, on nights like these, no matter how enchanting the view, xiao usually prefers to keep his blinds tightly shutー out of sight, out of mind. jealousy is a vile thing, isn't it? it's nasty, tainting your view of the world, of the things you love. after the first few weeks after xiao had moved in, the view quickly lost the charm it once had. because at the end of the day, to him, the view only serves as a cruel reminder of just how alone xiao is and always has been.

it dangles around a painful reminder of the things xiao can never have. it's so close, yet so far out of reach.

but despite his usual bitterness, xiao doesn’t bother closing the blinds tonight, because tonight, he has hope, hope that he could one day be like the many walks of life he sees everyday from his apartment window. hope that he’ll have something worth wondering about.

xiao sits himself on his bed, the second biggest source of comfort in his life right now. for some reason, he feels awfully nervous. he knows why, but he can’t help but wish that awful feeling away. for a split second, he can’t help but wish he was as confident and fearless as... no. he won’t think like that, not right now, at least. he shakes away the thought. butterflies jitter all up and around his stomach as his shaky hands picks up his phone and dials numbers, your numbers. the digits are already memorized by heart.

he tries to calm his nerves as he presses the phone up to his ear after hitting the call button, nails digging into the pajamas he changed into when he got home. he thickly swallows, waiting as patiently as he can, like usual.

ring. rinnng. rinnnnnggg.

it doesn't take too long for you to pick up.

"hello?" he finally hears.

it's only one word (and a pretty basic one at that), but xiao can already hear the soft underlying shyness of your voice. his mouth naturally opens a little agape. you've always been nervous around those you weren't close to. your voice sends him into a state of bliss, so much so his brain is too foggy to reply until you coo out another hello, questioning if anyone is there on the other line due to the silence.

he almost has to force himself to speak "It's… xiao," he blinks, not even saying hello back, "from professor zhongli's class," xiao almost slips up by saying the name you know him much better by. “you… we spoke on the train. I don’t know if you remember,” he manages to stutter out.

you had seemed pretty out of it when you two talked earlier that very same day. you must’ve been so exhausted to have fallen asleep like that, right next to him. he’s still replaying the site of it over and over, the way you were struggling so hard to stay awake, head bobbing back and forth. it was probably embarrassing for you, but it was a pleasant sight for him. the soft puff of your cheeks and the furrow of your brows, the shallowness of your breath and how relaxed you looked. it made him feel like a creep, staring at you in that state, such an intimate state, a vulnerable state.

it’s why he had held back as long as he could before finally tapping you awake, wanting to bask in the precious sight for longer.

he snaps back to finally finish his explanation, “…you gave me your number earlier today," he says it less as a reminder to you, but instead as a reminder to himself. he bites his lip, waiting for you to respond, wishing he could see what you looked like right now.

in the meantime, he remembers how your eyes had begrudgingly opened back up at the feeling of him touching you. he remembers the warmth of your body that felt like it could melt his finger tips from the heat. he wishes he could see and feel both much more often, but xiao is patient. lord, is he patient.

he remembers how embarrassed you looked as you sat up in your seat, trying to reorient yourself. “sorry, what did you say?” you finally had spoken after getting settled. you must’ve been too frazzled to hear him the first time. he cleared his throat before he repeated himself, this time a little louder, a little less shy than the first time around.

“I asked which stop you get off at.” you looked at him with eyes big with confusion. he hoped, desperately (he’s always so desperate), that he hadn’t made you feel anything negative.

he made sure to explain the question in hopes that it made you feel more comfortable and not as confused. “…I can wake you up before you get there, if you’d like.”

despite his wants, he needed to make sure you were safe, and were able to actually get home. if he didn’t ‘protect’ you, who would? definitely not that roommate of yours.

to his (would be short-lived) disappointment you had shaken your head. “no, it’s fine. I really shouldn’t have fallen asleep in the first place.” you had paused for a short second before saying, “thank you, though, xiao.” he doesn’t like to remember how he almost shivered at the sound of his name coming from your lips, nor how he had to turn his head as he nodded because he could feel heat creep up it.

"oh, yes, xiao! sorry, I wasn't expecting you to call so soon. what can I do for you?"

“you asked on the train if I could tutor you. I wanted to set something up.”

it’s true, even if xiao can’t believe it himself. he knew this day would come, but didn’t expect it to be this soon. after several minutes of silence between you two, (or at least as silent as it could be on a train), you had turned to him, as if remembering something, getting his attention before you asked him something.

“sorry if this is coming out of nowhere. I was wondering if…” you took a breath, and xiao had almost sworn you were bordering scared as you finished your question. “I was wondering if you could possibly tutor me for zhonglis class? I don’t know if you’d be able to, but I spoke to him earlier today, and he recommended asking you for help.”

and of course he had said yes, to your surprise. he remembers thinking, silently, that maybe the universe was rewarding him for being so patient, and he had to keep his cool the best he could.

now here he is, actually setting something up. “would tomorrow with you?”

"yes!," you let out a nervous little laugh at your uncontrollable excitement. xiao can just picture the smile you have on your face, all shy and awkward and cute. "that would work great, I think. I really wasn't expecting you to set something up so quickly. I'm grateful though."

xiao would make the tutoring session today during the dead of night if he could. of course he would set something up so quickly.

you don't need to know that, though.

xiao hums at your words. "we… we can have our first session at my place, if you're comfortable with that." he realizes he might be coming off too strong, so he adds, "but we can have it somewhere else too." he hopes you agree to the first suggestion though.

"t-that'd be great, yeah. whatever works for you, works for me."

"I'll text you the address and the time, then… and we can discuss more sessions or a schedule and stuff further.”

"that sounds good. thank you so much again." you repeat, and he can hear the relief in your voice. it should be him thanking you, really.

"of course. goodnight."

“goodnight!” you repeat before you both hang up. a wave of bliss strikes his body.

but he isn’t going to sleep, not yet, atleast. Instead, he’s going to stay up all night, right in front of his window, thinking of all the possible lives he’s about to live.

he’ll make sure to thank zhongli for that in the morning.

ーーー NEW MESSAGE ーーー ☆

[name]: I don't think you understand how nervous I am right now

[name]: my hands are shaking and everything

alatus: why? is something wrong?

[name]: you know how I told you how I wasn't doing the greatest in one of my courses?

alatus: of course. did something happen?

[name]: the most intimidating guy I've ever met in my life is my tutor now

[name]: and I have no idea how this first session is gonna go

alatus: I think you’ll be fine. you shouldn’t worry yourself

alatus: you should let me know how everything goes.

ーーー☆

xiao's home is, to put it simply, unique.

you were left awestruck as soon as you stepped into the small but gorgeous studio apartment, shocked by both the feeling of jealousy creeping up your spine and the thought of how someone could possibly afford such an apartment, especially as a college student. no matter how xiao manages to afford his place, though, his home daunts over you.

there's a large window that lines the wall his bed and desk are propped up against and you can't help but imagine just how xiao would look as he looked out of it and at the bustling city. the glass is frosted and wet from the pitter pattering rain that seems to persist in the cool weather of october. it's a little messy, books scattered about here and there and takeout bags littering the table, and the amount of lighting in this room seems to be as minimal (and as cold) as can be, but it's nothing too bad at all. nothing that you could complain about, at least.

there's so many things inside his house, so many things your eyes are drawn to, like his big bookcase and comfy bed and his expensive computer setup, and yet it feels so... lonely. devoid of life, even. maybe it's the look of the gloomy black walls and the fact that the only lighting xiao has is a tall floor lamp and the light that comes through his window, but you've never seen such a full home feel so empty. no plants except for one little succulent that's looking worse for wear, no photos of friends or family, no bright colors, no pets to breathe life into the place, no companion to help make this house a home. nothing.

you're suddenly grateful you have such a lively roommate.

it's been a few minutes since xiao had let you in, greeting you in his comfy hoodie and baggy pants, hair put up into a messy bun, before attending to something on his computer (an important email you think, or at least something along those likes, something urgent), telling you to sit wherever you'd like and that he'll be with you shortly. you had nodded while leaving your shoes at the door, asking him if his bed would be a seat he's okay with you being on, garnering a hum in response from him.

"...I'll sit here then, since it'll be close to you and stuff," you murmur, admittedly a bit more nervous and unconfident sounding than you'd like. you plop yourself onto xiao's bed, placing your bag at your feet in front of the bed for easy access. xiao takes what's meant to be a quick glance at you, but he's unable to look away.

he knows it's creepy to say, especially when you're just sitting down so innocently, but the sight is better than what he's fantasized about. he's thought of you so many times in his bed, cuddling with him and running your hands through his hair and letting him press kisses into your face and collar bones. he's thought about waking you up with breakfast and how you'd smile and thank him even if he can't cook very well, but he's willing to learn a couple recipes for you. he's thought about laying there with you after a long day, letting you ramble as he listened like he does as alatus. he's thought about how he'd great you once he comes home like you probably do with venti, watching your form as he wait on his bed for him.

and, most of all, he's thought about the way you'd cry and sob and call him a monster once the day that you find out that his bed is now yours and that this apartment is now your home, trapped forever with him, finally comes.

one day you'll be here permanently, he's sure of it. baby steps first, though.

xiao doesn't realize that in the midst of his thinking, he's been absolutely staring you down, and considering that xiao has a naturally viscous (bitchy) looking resting face, you can't help but squirm under his gaze. "xiao? I can... move, if you'd like."

"no, I just..." he clears his throat before looking back at the work in front of him. "sorry, I zoned out for a second. you can stay there if it feels comfortable. whatever you want." the words come out as a sort of awkward, almost inaudible mumble.

is this supposed to be as awkward and tense feeling as it is?

you nod at his words, albeit a little hesitant, further settling into the soft plush of his bed. your brain is still convinced that he might want you to move, but you decide to just stay where you are. you reach down from your seat, pulling out everything you would need from your bag, waiting patiently for any instructions. the soft clicking of xiao's keyboard and the sound of rain hitting against the window fill the otherwise silent room, and honestly, given the atmosphere and the way xiao's room is so dark and cozy and how warm and inviting his bed is, you're tempted to fall asleep.

xiao's presence, though nerve-wracking, makes you feel at home. it feels familiar. you wouldn't mind falling asleep near him again.

but today's (sadly) not the day for resting. xiao finishes whatever he's working on, closing out of the tab and turning his chair to face your spot on the bed. he brushes a piece of his hair back and out of the way, uncovering the eyebrow piercing the bothersome piece had previously hid. his eyes look dead, tired dark circles laying underneath, and yet he still forces himself to speak, like a zombie who simply refuses to just give up and die.

"did you have anything specific in mind that you want to go over?"

you take a second to think, humming in response. zhongli never truly specified what you needed to brush up upon, only that the last few assignments weren't up to his standards, whatever that means. "I don't know. maybe everything from the last few weeks? I'm not so sure."

he too lets out a soft little hum as he thinks for a moment. he's never tutored before, and he's pretty sure he doesn't even have the qualifications to actually be of any sort of help. he makes it up as he goes.

“on the back of your textbook, there's a study guide that covers all the chapters inside." he gently motions for you to give him the book sitting on your lap, flipping to the page before handing it back to you. "I want you to do the questions of the study guide that cover the chapters we've already read in class. then I'll... assess you from there, and we can come up with a plan.”

it seems like a lot of work, and that's because it is. the longer you spend here (the more he can milk this session for everything it's worth), the better.

you nod, moving to get to work immediately, putting your full effort into the task at hand. you both work silently, xiao clicking at his keys alongside the noise of you flipping through the pages of your textbook and jotting answers down. the noises compliment one another well, creating a lingering sense of peace and calm in the air. you find yourself getting stuck on one or two of the questions, but… surprisingly breezing through the rest, and after a while of working, you gently speak his name, alerting him that you've finished. he’s quick to take your work, starting his inspection of it.

your hands can’t help but get a little clammy as you watch as he reads through your answers, analyzing each and every single written word. in the meantime, you’re doing a little analysis of your own, trying to distract your mind from feeling any more nervous than you realistically should.

your eyes flick from his messy hair, to the beauty mark almost right in the middle of his forehead, then to the soft dusting of red eyeshadow under his eyes. you look at how he runs a finger against the words on the page, too, almost subconsciously, and though you can’t really tell from this angle what he’s doing, you think he’s more so tracing the letters you’ve written than using it as a means to follow along. he almost looks entranced. you don’t know what to expect from xiao, can’t even guess what he’s thinking, and the furrowed eyebrows on his face definitely don’t make you feel any better.

you sit there, idley, awkwardly, fidgeting for what seemed like more than just a few minutes, before xiao finally speaks up.

you can barely hear him as he speaks, his words hushed and muffled. "you... need a lot of brushing up on the content, and your answers… lack good explanations and reasoning." he hands you back your work, sending you an almost sympathetic look. "I can see why zhongli believes you need help,” he adds.

it's a lie, of course, but you don't need to know that, not when zhongli had so delicately laid down the groundwork for all of this to happen in the first place. most of your answers were just fine as is, at least from what he lightly skimmed through.

still, he can't help but feel guilty when that look of embarrassment washes over your face.

for some reason you feel yourself get overwhelmed with emotion. you thought that maybe, just maybe, zhongli was simply just messing with you, as was notorious with the man and his teaching methods. but there's a stark sense of embarrassment that comes from xiao reaffirming what zhongli had said, an embarrassment so strong it sends your entire body ablaze with heat.

you can't help but awkwardly shift in your seat as you nod along to his words despite the way your head almost feels too heavy to lift, avoiding eye contact lest he sees you so embarrassed over something so... silly, a miniscule problem at best, something fixable with a bit of elbow grease and time, and yet it means way more than it should to you.

you've worked so hard in this class already. why aren't you improving?

he doesn’t let you really catch your breath before he speaks again. "I think we'll need a couple more sessions than we discussed earlier," he mumbles, again, as though too ashamed to speak up, flipping through his own textbook, face in his hand as he thinks. "I want to make sure we can get as much content covered as possible before the end of the semester and catch you back up, since you seem to be..." xiao takes a quick glance at you, and for a moment, just a split second, he sees you, sees inside of you, sees every little thing you've been keeping bottled up, your fear. he looks away, breath hitching out of complete and utter guilt. he forces himself to continue though.

"...behind," he finishes, the single word said notably softer than the rest of the sentence.

xiao forces himself to swallow down his guilt. truly, he feels terrible about lying about this, because you clearly seem to be doing just fine on you own and lord knows how much stress this entire ordeal is causing you, but what's the use of being presented and blessed by the gods themselves with such an amazing opportunity if his sinning hands can't take it out of greed? xiao hates it, but he's always been more of a taker than a giver, taking all he can from people and leaving nothing left of them.

the simple pure utter bliss at the thought of spending hours and hours with you, in his room, alone, intimately and in person instead of just being with you through a phone screen, extinguishes any guilt he could possibly feel.

you, on the other hand, do allow yourself to feel guilt, though it's a feeling that has much more innocent roots than what xiao feels. it's a feeling that pokes and stabs at you as you fumble for words to say. you're a much better person than xiao is in that regard. you can't help but to feel ashamed, ashamed that you were doing so terrible at a course that goes directly into your major that you would have to force xiaoー a man renowned for being a lonerー who surely would rather spend his free time by himself and not tutoring someone so out of your realm and element as you are.

maybe it's not too late after all to consider switching majors, you think.

"you seriously don't have to do that, I don't want to take more time from you than I'm already taking. honestly, I think I'm a bit of a lost cause at this point if I can't even do the simpler questions."

the truth is, not even xiao knows how scared you are. fear and dread soars through your body at the thought of ending up in the same spot you were in last year.

xiao lets out a sigh through his nose at your words, a noise that does nothing other than make you feel worse, especially when you can't read his emotions and tell what's going on in that labyrinth of a brain he has. maybe he's realized that you're not worth spending his time. maybe you really are a loss cause. maybe you really should change your major. maybe you should call it quits and drop out. maybe you should move countries, marry a rich doctor or a lawyer and spend the rest of your days as a glorified housespー

xiao doesn't let you finish your thoughts (plans), instead getting up from his chair slowly. "let's take a break." he says, and while you feel a break is a little undeserved after you haven't done much studying, you nod, thinking it might be best to just relax before jumping back into things. "taking things slowly is the better way to do things," you nod, although the words just barely register themselves in your head. you're surprisingly vulnerable with him.

"I'm... going to step out for a moment to get some air. I'll give you some time for yourself to think." you nod, giving him a small and meek thank you, genuinely so utterly grateful for all the time xiao has given you. you can't help yourself from bothering him just once more before he leaves, though.

"xiao?" you don't look up at him, eyes fixated on your answers and what must've been so wrong with them. you hear him hum, beckoning you to continue.

“do you think I'll be able to pass?”

"of course you will," he answers, and it's the first truth he's said all day.

"of course," he mumbles, this time lower, a reminder to himself of how you'd be completely fine on your own, and that he should never, ever take this opportunity for granted.

he makes a promise to himself that he won't.

----- NEW TEXT MESSAGE -----☆

zhongli: hello, [name]. xiao informed me earlier today that you two will be conducting your first study session today. I'm glad you spoke to him about tutoring like I had advised you to. how are things going?

[name]: it's going fine, he mostly just reaffirmed what you already told me though. but he's been really kind about it all, I'm grateful that he agreed to help me out.

zhongli: I see. I hope that he could give you a new perspective on things and aid you in your weak spots. xiao is an amazing student in his own right, and I'm sure that together, you two will make an amazing team. I'm glad you two are getting along.

zhongli: I'd like to give you a little heads up for a future assignment, but there will be a project upcoming where I'll be sure to partner you two up. I'm sure you two will impress me on what you come up with.

zhongli: I believe in you, [name], and I expect good things coming forward.

zhongli: I'm sure that xiao is grateful as well.

[name]: thank you.

[name]: I hope to meet your standards as best as I can.

-----☆

the apartment is even quieter than it was before without xiao.

it's lonely, too.

in a way, you used this little moment to yourself as a justification and way to figure out just what exactly is the enigma that is xiao. now that you're by yourself, you find yourself looking around at his walls, glancing over at one of the two of his cork boards that seems to have a bunch of what looks to be memorabilia of all sorts, stuff like old music concert tickets of local bands you've never heard of, polaroids with some familiar places and even some of his friends, post-it note scribbles of different tasks he has to get done, among other things.

you visualize yourself looking at the corkboard as though it's those ones in those crime movies, where you're using red yarn to connect the pieces of a story together, figuring out with all the clues you have at your disposal who xiao is.

there's other things, too. posters lining the wall and a singular cat shaped plushie on his bed, a wilted bouquet of flowers in a vase on his kitchen countertop meant for decoration, various little knick knacks on his desk, but the part of his room that catches your eye most, though, is his large, expansive bookshelf filled (a little messily) with a variety of different things, almost all of it stuff you actually recognize.

you’re halfway through looking around before you hear the door open back up again. you instinctually freeze, as of you’re a kid who’s been caught with their hand in the cookie jar. you shift your head, locking eyes with him as he steps back inside. to your surprise, he doesn’t look upset, not even annoyed, just intrigued as he watches you awkwardly shuffle away a little from the bookshelves.

you try to apologize with hast. “sorry, I wasn’t trying to snoop or anything, I swear, I was just–“

xiaos quick to interject as he walks right past you over to sit, this time on his bed instead of at his desk. “it’s fine. I don’t mind. you don’t have to apologize.” he crosses his arms once he’s situated in his seat. “do whatever you’d like.” he adds in an attempt to comfort you.

it sounds sarcastic, but you somehow can tell that it’s not. you nod, taking it as (hoping that it’s) permission to keep going. your eyes move over to the other corkboard near the bookshelves, hoping that you’re not stepping over any boundaries by doing so. this board is filled more with many different photos pinned up onto it. there’s all sorts of sites and places, things like concerts or shops or restaurants or nature– the list goes on– with a rare one or two photos with him actually in it. even rarer seemed to be other people that didn’t look like strangers in the background.

you subconsciously speak a thought aloud. “you seem to go out a lot. to really cool places, too.”

the only thing he really says in response is, “all of those aren’t recent.”

you hum in response, eyebrows furrowing a little as you nod in understanding. “oh, I see.” xiao takes it as an opportunity to ask you something even though he knows the answer already. “what about you? do you go out a lot?”

the question takes you a little aback. “I haven’t gotten out a lot recently either.” you try to think about all you’ve done recently, before realizing there’s nothing much to think about at all. you add, in truth, “…you’re honestly the first person I’ve spent time with in a while that wasn’t my roommate, but I don’t think that really counts.”

he cocks his head to the side at that answer, golden eyes staring at you (almost straight through your soul), intrigued. “why haven’t you spent time with anyone else?

a soft pang hits your heart as you think about the reason. the breakup. despite how much time has gone by, you’re still tender about the topic, and would rather not think about everything it’s caused as a result. would rather not think about him, either.

you let out a nervous laugh. “that’s a long story, I guess.”

xiao seems dissatisfied with that answer. he’s never responded so quickly, without hesitating before.

“I have time.”

you send a look of slight confusion his way. “I thought we were going to study some more today?”

“right…” xiao let’s a lot of dead air slip in whenever he speaks, pausing and hanging onto words as if he’s doing mental calculations to figure out what the right thing to say next. “…in the future, then.”

you nod as your eye continues it’s adventure through the board before another photo catches your attention fully. it’s a pretty photo of a bunch of people standing near the docks, holding up and letting go of lanterns. it looks like, judging from the date scribbled on the bottom of the photo and the contents of the photo itself, the annual lantern rite from a few years back. you remember that day, almost vividly, too. that was your first year at the school. you and venti had gone together that year. it was magical. it seems like xiao really was never too far from you. seriously, you’re surprised you two haven’t talked sooner.

you can’t help but smile as you reminisce on that day. “I remember this exact lantern rite. there was so many people, and the lanterns were so beautiful. they always are.”

you turn around to face him, again. “how long has it been since you’ve gone to the harbor? if I lived as close as you do, I think I’d go to the harbor whenever I have time.”

it takes awhile for xiao to respond, not because he’s thinking of an answer, but because he’s transfixed on your expression right now. you seem so happy that it naturally just pulls on his heart strings. he’s glad you still remember that particular lantern rite, even though he knows you’ve gone to more since then. xiao remembers that day visibly too, but probably (definitely) not for the same you do. he wonders if you remember that part of it deep inside.

“um… since the day of that photo, probably.”

you’re a little taken aback from that answer. xiao lives on the outskirts of the harbor. how could he have not gone back in years? everything you learn about xiao makes you more and more curious as to who he is. “really?” you can’t help but ask. he can’t help but shrug.

you speak without even thinking twice once more. “would you want to go again sometime then?” your eyes dart away from his face. you can’t help but look away before you finish the question, unable to look him in the eye as you clarify, “with me, I mean.” you stumble out the words more confidently than you exprcted.

he lets out a sigh. “there’s nothing I want from there…” it’s the truth. he hasn’t been very fond of the harbor for what has felt like centuries, especially not the memories he’s tethered to. he can’t help but to regret the accidental roughness of his words, though, when he looks up to see a flash of embarrassment paint across your face. it feels like he picked the wrong answer, but he wants to say the right one, desperately. xiao has never been great at talking, but he’s trying, for you. “but if you’d like… I’d like to go with you.”

you try to hide the way your heart picks up the pace a little at his words. “let’s go soon, then. I can tell you about myself, and you can tell me about you, too.”

he nods, and for a split second you think you’ve gone insane, because you swear, swear, that for a few seconds, the corner of xiao’s lips curve softly into a smile. a smile! smiling at the thought of you two ‘hanging out’ in the future! for all the times you’ve seen xiao, you can maybe only count on one hand how many times you’ve seen him smile.

“you want to learn about me?” he asks, earnestly, shocked, and it definitely wasn’t a question you were expecting.

“yeah, I mean I've always seen you around. I think we've even been in the same classes before this year, too, and now I’m getting tutored by you and I still know pretty much nothing about you.” you pause before adding on, “I’d love to learn more. I hope that’s not weird, or anything.”

he shakes his head, the ghost of a smile still etched onto his lips. and if you looked closely (which luckily for him, you weren’t), you’d see the faint dust of blush decorating his cheeks, too. “I don’t have much to tell you, but… that sounds good.”

he feels embarrassed at the fact he can’t control how warm his cheeks feel and how he can’t help but crack a smile at you. he clears his throat, trying to reset himself, suddenly ready to move on, going back to his desk.

“let’s keep working, I want to make the most out of the time we have together.” he doesn’t look at you as he speaks. you mentally brace yourself for another study session with him.

it’s gonna be a long night.

ーーー NEW MESSAGE ーーー ☆

ven: where have you been?

ven: haven’t seen you all day……….. ):

ven: my flower, the house is so empty without you……….. ))):

ven: are you with somebody? you never tell me these things anymore.

ven: talk to me soon, please.

ーーー ☆

it's late into the night when you're awakened rudely with a few desperate knocks against your bedroom door.

you can't help but groan as you stir awake, upset to be forced out of your dream state, although that irritation is soon replaced with guilt once you realize just why you were being awakened with such urgency in the first place. after whining out a loud, 'come in,' you peak your eyes open to see your best friend standing in your doorway, tears staining his face so much that they're visible even in the darkness.

shit. it's been so long since you've seen venti like this. you thought all of that was over ages ago.

"can I sleep with you tonight?" his voice is shakey yet gentle, filled with fear and something that you can only label as... need, as if he needs you more than he ever has. just his voice alone, paired with the way he looks so in the doorway while he's shivering and fiddling with his pajamas, hair looking almost as distraught as he's feeling, is enough to have you too stunned to speak.

"please?" he adds on when you don't reply immediately.

you nod, scooting over to make room for him as he slowly trudges to your bed like he's done many times before. he's quick to settle in under the covers with you, laying against the plush pillow underneath him. you move closer to him as though it's instinct, an action done out of retained muscle memory from the many nights you've spent doing this exact thing. your eyes, though half lidded and heavy, trace over his face over and over again, noting how his eyes look back at you and you can't help but think that venti is such an expressive person. even if he's so silent right now, his eyes are cloudy and storming, speaking a thousand words with the thunder that rings out within them.

he looks like he's trying to think of what to say, but he doesn't need to say a single thing. you already know why he's here.

his face is contorted in a way that almost showcases utter agony, and it hurts, hurts to see your best friend suffering, especially when the best you can do is guide your hand softly against the smooth the skin of his cheek and brushing away any tears in pity. if nothing else, you truly do hope that, at the very least, your presence can help.

“do you maybe want to talk about it?” you run your hand through his soft, pretty dyed blue locks that seem to almost glow in the moonlight, feeling the light moisture of his skin from his sweat. you’ve forgotten just how easy it always has been to brush your hand through his locks. your voice is gentle and low as if not to startle him, as if not to shatter him more than he already is. “you know you don’t have to, but you can always talk to me if you need to.”

“no, it’s okay... I just want to be with you right now.” his voice is meek as he chooses his words carefully as though they're meticulously chosen to pull at your heartstrings (they do), and he sounds like he’s on the brink of tears once more.

“is it the same dream as before?” you ask, remembering how many nights you've spent with venti just like this when he began getting frequent ‘nightmares’ awhile back, nightmares that till this day you don't know the contents of.

he nods, although hesitantly, as though it’s some sort of secret. and in a way, it is.

he could never, ever, ever tell you that you’re the cause of all of his nightmares after all.

“are you sure you don’t want to talk about it? you look really upset. you've never told me what makes you like this.”

“no, I just want to… I just want to stay like this for a while.”

“okay, ven,” you whisper, soft and quiet, as if your voice could shatter him whole. you pause, thinking of what to say, before you decide that you won’t prode any further, instead bidding him a goodnight. “I love you, venti. get some rest.”

for the first time in maybe months, venti doesn’t tell you he loves you back.

instead he burrows himself as deep as humanly possible, as if being torn away from you would kill him, just like the way his dreams pulled and tugged ruthlessly at his heart strings, shoving images of you with your new 'tutor' down his throat, like they had with him months and months ago.

how cruel is it that he's forced to see you being ripped away from him both in real life and in his dreams?

-----☆

you're half asleep when you feel him mumble into your skin.

"I miss you. I miss this." he whispers, but you can barely hear him. he misses the way you feel, how comforting you smell, how his hands connect with your body like they're puzzle pieces. he misses having all your attention on him like this, so quick to coo and ask if he's okay. everything’s changed from how it used to be.

"what?"

you feel venti's hands slip under your shirt, feeling the warm skin of your back as he slowly trails his hands up and down, basking in the way that you feel. "I miss you, cecilia. especially today." his voice isn't shakey anymore. instead it's much more fluid, as though he never had the night terrors that brought him into your room to begin with. you can't help but frown at his words even in your sleepy state.

"venti..." you mumble out, feeling his hands start to dig themselves into your skin. his grip on your waist is tightー not enough for it to hurt, but just enough that it keeps you from pushing him away if you really wanted to, trapping and suffocating you, bordering the lines of sucking the air out of your lungs.

part of you wishes he wouldn't keep things so bottled up from you, because clearly, your constant 'absence' in his life is hurting him more than you'll ever be able to understand, but the more selfish part of you is shamefully grateful that he is. you love venti, but for a man who constantly champions for freedom, he's always been so dead set on taking away yours.

you know deep down that if you gave venti an inch, he'd take a mile, and you don't have many miles left to give. you could spend twenty-four hours of a day with venti and he would still want you to somehow spend twenty-five on him. as much as you love ventiー truly, you love him more than anything else in the worldー, you know it'd be better if you didn't indulge him as much as you want him to. lord knows how quick venti would be to turn you into a hollow, empty shell of yourself by taking every second you have all for himself if he could.

besides, this whole thing will blow over eventually after the party, right?

right?

"I know that I've already whined and complained about it, but god, I miss you. you were gone for so long today with someone I don't even know… seeing you occasionally here and there isn't enough for me. I..." venti somehow manages to pull his body even closer to you, your chest and his chest plush against each other, so close that you can feel the way it rises as he breathes slowly. "I know I'm selfish, but I need you."

he says the word 'need' as if he'd die without you.

you don't think this is a conversation you two should be having when you're so... out of it, exhausted.

"venti, can we talk about this in the morning?"

his grip slowly loosens. "...okay." he says the word slowly and hesitantly, as if he's a child saying a cuss word for the first time, as if agreeing to put his feelings aside until you're in a much more lucid and conscious state is a sin. "I'm... I'm sorry for bothering you and being so clingy and... I just..." venti swallows thickly. "goodnight," venti mumbles, choosing not to finish his thought.

your eyebrows furrow, something about this whole conversation feeling off to you. never in a million years would venti have been so... upfront, apart from the day he invited you to the party. it's like venti's slowly unraveling like a string, just one little tug away from snapping.

it wouldn't be the first time venti's snapped on you though. you need to mend things and shut off the ticking time bomb before things blow up in your face again, like when you...

like when you...

ugh. you'll think about all of this later when you're actually well-rested and capable of forming cohesive thoughts. you softly mumble out a goodnight to venti as well, praying that the storm will blow off soon enough.

it doesn't, though. the winds only get stronger and louder.

ーーー☆

venti wasn't in your room by the time you woke up. infact, he wasn't in the apartment at all. not in his room, not in the kitchen or in the bathroom getting ready, nowhere. he didn't even leave a text telling you where he went.

you guess that venti needs time to think after last night, and you decide that it's probably for the best.

you'll see him again later anyways.

ーーー☆

it's cold out today, october's chill punishing you for wearing too light of a sweater for the weather, but the freezing temperature of the classroom during today's lecture isn't the cause of the way you squirm in your seat out of discomfort. no, you have professor zhongli to take credit for that.

you're convinced that zhongli gets a kick out of giving you borderline heart attacks.

honestly, that isn't exactly far from the truth. there's something about the way your eyes flicker in complete, utter fear just by him saying, "[name], may you please see me after class? there's something I'd like to discuss with you," that sends shivers down his spine, as egregious as that may sound. it's a shameful feeling for a professor to have, but at least he has much more innocent intentions this time as opposed to the last time he's asked you to stay behind.

the request was given to you right at the start of class (which you were actually on time to, thank god) before he began with his lecture. and once again, you couldn't help but think about just what exactly zhongli wanted to discuss with you throughout the entire lecture, almost too busy coming up with theories to focus. all you can think is, did you do something wrong again? was the assignment you turned in last night bad? all that studying you did with xiao couldn’t have been for nothing, right? you're going to fail the semester at this rate.

you wish zhongli was more dead set on helping you pass like last year than assuring that you failed.

you can’t help but call back to that time. you had been much worse off back then. you were visibly behind everyone else, but it hadn't started that way. so much was happening back then. and that breakup, oh that fucking break up, really made focusing on your school work beyond difficult. you truly did put up a fight, tried to make sure you stayed afloat, and it did work at first. but your responsibilities drowned you completely, and you never really learned how to swim.

it was a rough semester, and one of your classes had been taught by the very same man taking great pleasure in ruining you today. your one saving grace? once again, the very same man, who had seemed to take enough pity onto you that he took matters into his own hands to make sure you did well.

you stood out back then, not because you shone bright, but because you didn't shine at all.

zhongli wanted to light that fire back in you that you had at the start of the year. and he had.

zhongli had took you under his wing, struck you with passion and drive, made you fall in love all over again with the topic you were studying through his ramblings and stories and sheer utter knowledge; he revitalized you, filled a hole. he had kept you after class and in his office on weekends, making time to make sure that you succeeded and through his gentle nurturing that was the hot to his own cold. you had succeeded, to your surprise. and he had looked after you ever since.

it was silly for you to believe that he would grace you with the same mercy this course.

but things are different now. so much more different. you were grateful back then for him striving to push you to do better, but now it's overwhelming. back then, his standards were achievableー finish your assignments on time as often as you could, study a little when you can, at least attempt to attend every class you had. it was doable. but now, now you're almost convinced he wants you to become borderline perfectー no, perfect is an understatement. he wants you to be better than perfect.

perfect, and vulnerable.

back then it felt as though he was trying to help you but now, the back of your mind can't help but tell you that he's always been helping himself, benefiting himself, not you.

it was at the start of this school year that you let yourself fall right into the dragon's lair.

either way, maybe it's the fact that your mind was so occupied, or maybe time simply just decided to speed up, but the class flew by in no time. you had practically tuned out all of zhongli's ramblings and teachings today. you watched zhongli dismiss the class, staying seated despite the way everyone else shuffled out of the door as quickly as possible. once again, it was just you and zhongli in the empty room.

fuck.

zhongli walks to the front of your desk, running a hand through his hair before letting out a long sigh, and you never knew how such a little harmless action could strike so much fear into your heart. could you just combust already? you're not at all ready for whatever zhongli has to say.

"what a long class we had today, hm? I hope I didn't bore you too much. you looked particularly distracted." zhongli says, smiling gently at you as he attempts to brighten the gloomy mood you're clearly in. "luckily, though, I've been excited to talk to you all class. you truly were my saving grace today."

is this some kind of sick joke? you were kidding when you thought zhongli must get pleasure out of your failure, but you might actually be right.

gross.

"don't worry, though, I didn't keep you after class just to complain. I'll get to the point, since I know you hate pointless chatter."

"I know it's far too early to say this, but I'm proud of you, [name]."

that caring nature still shines through, the strict professor he's supposed to be eroded and washed away by time itself.

your eyebrows furrow. "what?" you can’t help but let the word slip out of your mouth in the midst of your confusion.

"the assignment you gave in last night, truly one of your best works this semester. you never fail to amaze me with how fast you manage to make a turnaround when you put your mind to it, [name]."

the assignment? the one you worked on last night at the last second despite having over a week to do it after studying with xiao that you had to keep your eyes pried open to complete? the one xiao had borderline picked apart a dozen times as though trying to break you down even more? that assignment?

what?

"but I... what? if it was any good, it's likely only because xiao was there to help me." you mumble, unsure of your words.

"so? are you really diminishing your accomplishments just because you got a little aid?" zhongli plants a hand on your cheek like he has a dozen times in the past before guiding your face to look up at him. "or are you trying to say that it was xiao who had done your assignment, not you?"

"o-of course he didn't, but-" zhongli is quick to shush you, pressing a gloved thumb against your lips with a soft smile.

"shh. you did well, and that's final. I hope this pattern continues. you know I want nothing but the best for you after seeing what you can achieve." his gloved hand caresses your cheek and you're convinced he can feel the heat your face is producing out of embarrassment even through the layer of fabric. "my little star, you're doing well again." he adds quietly, so quietly that you can just barely make it out, though the nickname is far less shocking than the praise that your brain is still trying to make sense of.

"before I let you go, I just wanted to reiterate that should you ever need my assistance with anythingー and I mean anything at all, whether it's related to your academics or notー know that I am and always will be here."

"I... thank you." it's the only words you can come up with as zhongli leaves you alone with your thoughts. "thank you," you repeat, speaking the words much more quietly. in a hushed whisper.

in the back of your mind, you realize that you should be thinking about how odd it is for zhongli to suddenly be so sugary sweet, how he's touched you so much more intimately than a professor should, how his little nickname for you is weird at best, and yet all you can think about is how he's proud of you.

for some reason, that's all that really matters to you in the moment. you can think about... all that other stuff, later.

ーーー☆

it's almost pitch dark out by the time you finally get home.

"I'm home!" you shout out as soon as you step through the front door, voice a little breathy after having to climb up a few flights of stairs to get up to your apartment, alerting venti that you've arrived in a way akin to how married couples do. you're quick to lock the door behind you, stripping yourself of your shoes that feel more like weights before placing them in the shoe rack near the door and putting your heavy bag down next to venti's violin case, deciding you'll bother with getting whatever you need out of there when you feel like it. you wince a little at the cold tiles of the floor underneath your feet.

maybe one day you'll move into a place with an actual heater, you think.

"I'll be there in just a second!" venti's voice rings out from what you assume is the bathroom down the hall, likely showering given the pitter-pattering sound of running water. you nod, as though responding to him despite the fact he can't see you, flicking on the light switch to the kitchen as you do so. the kitchen table immediately grabs your attention with how different it looks compared to how you left it this morning. two orange pumpkins sit at the center, and alongside it lays an unopened package of carving tools and another package of tea lights, a brown bag filled with what looks to be some house decor and knick knacks (venti truly does love trying to make your run-down apartment as much of a true home as possible), and a bag of groceries yet to be put away.

you sit down at the medium sized wooden table, allowing yourself to rest and bask in the day as you look through everything infront of you. it's been awhile since you've just sat in silence and thought, and even longer since you let yourself really live in this home without just heading straight to your room. your nails drill against the table, pushing one of the two pumpkins closer to you with a soft hum. you trace a finger against it, imaginging what'd you want to carve on it and how it'd glow after you put a candle inside.

this year you should do something new, get a little more fancier with the design that you have in the previous years that you craved a pumpkin. maybe you and venti will carve matching jack-o-laterns this year. you can't help but smile at the thought.

"they're cute, aren't they?"

you tense up when you feel a hand on your shoulder, but you instantly relax when you turn your head to see venti. you guess you were so lost in thought you hadn't heard him come out of the bathroom. you drink in his presence, giving him a glance over out of instinct. the smell of his apple-cinnamon bodywash assault your senses in an oddly comforting way, a scent that makes you feel right at home. he's in a pair pajamas and cute bunny slippers, and his hair is clipped up in a pretty half up, half down ponytail. the blue dyed tips of his hair are losing their signature color (which is odd, considering that despite his inherit laziness, venti's always been one to make sure those tips stay bright blue at all costs) and his skin looks a little damp.

a gummy smile paints his face, and he has a bit of a playful glint in his eye, but he looks notably tired, and a sense of worry pings at your heart at the sight. you were the roommate notorious for having bags under your eyes afterall, not him, so to see him look so exhausted, especially when venti's always been one for getting his 'beauty sleep,' tells you that venti internally isn't feeling his best. it sounds shallow, judging someone's mental health based on their appearance, but you know venti like the back of your hand, and you know that something's wrong.

even moreso, you know exactly what that wrong thing is, given last night's conversation.

"I got them at the grocery store today. thought it might be fun to carve them together before they go bad. that is, if you want to grace me with your undivided time and attention, of course." venti pretends he's joking, but you know deep down he means the sentiment of wanting you to give him your time for once, and you honestly feel awful at his words. nonetheless, you suck it up, smiling up at him. it's a genuine smile.

"why wouldn't I? it is tradition after all. I'm going to make mine extra scary this year."

venti laughs at your words, his heart internally flutter at the thought of how determined your face would look as you try to create the spookiest jack-o-latern he's ever seen. he leans down, pressing a soft, platonic peck to your forehead, finally giving you a welcome home.

"you're home later than usual again, everything go okay?"

you can't help but notice that venti is acting as if he had never said what he said last night, though the air between you is still awkward and tense, and his face does little to hide the fact that deep down, he's still quelling on the things he spoke about. nonetheless, you decide that that conversation is to be had when venti wants it to happen, knowing full well from years of being his best friend that venti prefers keeping a lighter mood at all costs, so you leave things at that until he's ready to speak about it again.

"yeah, I just thought that I'd try to get some work done while I could at campus," you answer, watching as he nods slowly at your words. you can tell he's fighting back the urge to interrogate you, to ask you if you were with anybody and if you really needed to stay at campus, and anything else he can use as a way to rationalize the fact that he's so clingy. he looks around the room, thinking about what else he could say to make sure the conversation doesn't end prematurely.

"oh! I ordered some takeout a bit before you came home. it's still hot, if you want to eat."

you nod, thanking him, and you can tell he's trying to read you, to figure out just how exactly he can stay with you longer without him bringing up anything you two talked about last night. he stands there, presence lingering as though he has something to say, and yet he chooses not to say whatever's on his mind, instead preferring to pick up the unopened bottle of dandelion wine on the nearby kitchen counter.

"you seem all set. I'll get going now, then. I have an urgent date with a bottle of wine that I can't miss for the world." venti moves quickly to leave as though trying to make sure you don't see through to him, turning his back to you without another word, but he doesn't get too far before he's freezing up at your words.

"you're not gonna stay and chat?" you say instinctively, a little surprised by the fact he was so quick to come and go today. you don't know what it is about today, but the thought of venti forcing himself to go when he clearly doesn't want to pains you. maybe it was last night's conversation, or maybe it's how venti radiates warmth that fights against the biting cold that nips at your skin, or maybe you just miss venti, but you want him here with you.

venti turns around slowly, his voice low as he speaks. "oh..." he starts off, "I thought you would've wanted to eat alone like all the other nights," you almost let out a wince at his words. how long has it really been since you last simply hung out with venti? "do you... want me to stay?" you let out a gentle hum.

"I want you here tonight. I want to talk to you."

"about what?"

you think about everything you'd want to tell venti, and you realize that that's exactly it; you want to tell him everything and anything you can. you want to tell him about your new tutor who turned out to be a lot less scary than you were expecting him to be, or that new coffee shop a friend had told you about that opened up near by that you'd love to tell him about, or how zhongli was actually kind to you today. but you also want venti to tell you everything too, about any escapades he's had recently while drunk or new songs he's written, or even how his classes are going and if he's thinking of going to any other parties soon.

you realize that, as much as you'd hate to admit it to yourself, you miss just being with venti a lot too.

"everything," you finally reply after thinking, grinning up at his hesitant form.

"everything? really? this isn't a ploy to tell me horrific news or to try to get out of going to that party, is it?"

"no, I promise. I'm honestly a bit offended you'd think I'd ever be so cruel as to try to get out of going to such an amazing party," you joke.

venti playfully rolls his eyes at your words, but he can't help the smile that creeps up his face. his smile is bright like a star, warm enough for a planet to survive off of, eyelids crinkling at the corners of his eyes as he puts the bottle in his hand down befofe he pulls up one of the kitchen chairs, the legs screeching against the floor so that he's sitting infront of you. he leans in close to you as though you were about to tell him the greatest story known to man. you can't help but feel warm and fuzzy inside. venti's smile, his real and genuine smile, gives you a feeling like no other. it makes you feel whole, like none of your problems neither exist nor matter and that everything in this world is perfect.

"okay then, dove, tell me everything."

ーーー NEW TEXT MESSAGE ーーー☆

alatus: can you believe it's almost sunday already?

[name]: holy shit, time is going by so fast

[name]: I'm so excited to meet you in person

alatus: I'm excited too.

[name]: I can't believe I've known you for over a year and I'm only going to get to see your face now

[name]: I swear, if you're just some creep...

alatus: I promise I'm not.

alatus: well, maybe.

[name]: ha ha, very funny.

[name]: but seriously, it honestly feels like I've known you for forever.

alatus: maybe you have and you just never noticed

#tw stalking #tw age gap #tw possession #tw student teacher relationship #tw yandere #tw manipulation #yandere xiao x reader #yandere venti x reader #yandere zhongli x reader #yandere Genshin impact x reader

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secfics · 9 months

Text

my favourite starker fics, part 1

hi. for my first reclist in this blog, i put together my personal favourite starker fanfics that i re-read again and again. in no particular order and with some cw/dark themes here and there, here they come:

• maybe different, but remember; by RoamingSignals (@spider-mancan), E, 18k, 2/2 chapters

Peter is working at Delmar’s, sorting out tabloids on the rack in the front, and he sees Tony’s face plastered everywhere and then Peter is reading words and then he can’t read anything because he’s crying and his shaking hands rip the magazine in half.

Tony Stark…alive.

He saved the world, saved Peter, and Peter never even got to thank him. Not that it matters now. If Peter was a factor in Tony's decision to snap his fingers, Peter will never know. No one will ever know, because Peter fucked up and now he doesn’t exist.

• touchpoint; by RoamingSignals (@spider-mancan), M, 57’6k, 2/2 chapters

Peter lost a lot of things in Boston. When he lists them out, they fit in the margins of his napkin; his career, his degree, his motivation, his boyfriend, and himself. Not in that order. Not all by mistake.

“You’re just a secretary.” Tony tuts.

“There’s nothing wrong with being a secretary,” Peter says. “Your old secretary is the CEO of SI, these days.”

“Pepper Potts is the smartest woman I’ve ever met,” Tony agrees. “And she never let anyone call her ‘just a secretary.’”

• scaling the walls; by Starker1975 (@starker1975), E, 42’6k, 13/13 chapters

Peter is tired of crushing hopelessly on Tony, so he decides to create an online dating profile to meet someone new. Neither Peter (Webster01) or his strange beau (Mark70) have pictures on their bio. They decide to keep it that way so they can focus on bonding over things besides appearance.

Meanwhile, Tony decides to start spending more time with Peter because people always become interested as soon as you try to move on...

• fucking if; by Graceful_Starker (@graceful-starker), M, 9’7k, 2/2 chapters - cw: implied non-con, not between starker

Peter and Tony in a beginning phases relationship. Then the snap. Peter coming back to Tony, Pepper and Morgan.

• revelations; by Anonymous (#author has already arranged a ride to church trust me), E, 126’8k, 19/19 chapters

“I still don’t get it,” Ned says. “How you just... keep being ordinary in spite of all the craziness you’ve lived through. You were in space. You helped Iron Man save the universe. And nobody knows it was you.” His tone softens, becomes almost sad. As though he realizes that what he’s saying is so completely alien to him that he will never be able to understand this part of Peter’s life. “Peter, don’t you want people to know you for who you are?”

An AU where they get the Gauntlet off of Thanos that first time, on Titan.

• closer to a prayer; by LearnedFoot (@learned-foot), E, 17’4k, oneshot

“I think I’m dying.”

Peter stares at his reflection in the bathroom mirror, blinking. It feels weird to say it out loud.

In which Peter's powers turn against him, Mr. Stark is back and suddenly acting kind of weird (and by weird he means flirtatious), and it’s all a lot to handle at once.

• stuck; by Heathertastic (@heathertastic), E, 5’4k, oneshot - cw: Accidental Penetration

Tony and Peter get stuck together in a closet the size of Peter himself- and yeah, it’s basically porn without plot.

• Give Me Your Wallet (And Your Watch); by airebellah (@airebellah), M, 30’5k, 10/10 chapters

It was pushing midnight when Peter sent a text to his friend Ned asking for help with a chemistry problem. I know I'm doing something wrong but I can't figure it out, he wrote. He received a text with a picture of the solution. The elegant script should have been the first clue; the fact that it was on the back of a napkin the second. But he was tired, and failed to notice such details.

You misplaced your decimal when converting degrees to Kelvin, came the reply. Rookie mistake.

Gee, thanks, Peter replied with a roll of his eyes. Anything you need help with?

Yeah, who the fuck am I talking to, exactly?

• covet; by Anonymous (#author has already arranged a ride to church trust me), E, 33’9k, 5/5 chapters

Peter has a new boyfriend. Tony starts drinking again, for unrelated reasons.

• uranium heart; by spqr, M, 11´3k, oneshot

It’s probably better, Peter thinks, that he doesn’t know who his soulmate is. He wouldn’t want to lie to them about Spider-Man, but he doesn’t think he’d be able to tell them the truth, either. Not when he knows it would make them a target for every villain who wants a piece of him.

When he has enough free time to feel sorry for himself, he thinks about how lonely he is and how much he wants someone to talk to--just talk to. But he doesn’t really have that much free time. And anyways, there are thousands of lonely people in New York. Peter’s nothing special.

• another life; by InColor (@incolorwrites), E, 9’3k, oneshot

Tony comes back to a world where everyone's moved on without him.

Peter helps.

• secret santa, baby; by orphan_account, E, 17´3k, 5/5 chapters

Tony never intended to become Peter's Secret Santa. He just sort of stumbles into it. But now that he is, he's going to take advantage of it. Tony's got one week to spoil the kid, one week until Christmas. He just has to make sure that his secret stays secret.

• your thoughts are my desires; by Sparcina (@zsparz), E, 6’2k, 4/4 chapters

Peter doesn't know that Tony can read his thoughts.

Alternatively: Tony gets intimately acquainted with Peter's fantasies feelings.

• peter parker, sexter extraodinaire; by Sparcina (@zsparz), E, 7’5k, 4/4 chapters

Apparently, sexting Mr. Stark by accident is a thing Peter does now. While touching himself. And Tony... Well, he probably shouldn't fantasize about Peter, but the kid's just too damn attractive and brilliant for his own good.

• just for tonight; by keenwonderlandcollector, M, 31’1k, 10/10 - cw: incest/father-son incest

While out at an exhibit, Peter gets into an awkward situation and pretends that Tony, his father, is actually his boyfriend. Tony goes along with it, and Peter soon finds himself enjoying it a little too much…

• from the bounty; by feyrelay (@feyrelay) & natureboy, E, 31’8k, 3/3 chapters

Tony’s eyes are always dark, but now there's almost no iris left. He looks hollowed out. There’s something terribly hungry there, despite the feast they've filled themselves on.

(20k words of food erotica foreplay and 13k words of porn)

• better than; by unsettled (@unsettledink), M, 40’6k, oneshot

Maybe there isn't really a fixed point where it starts, where any of it starts, nothing Tony can point to and say, there, there is where I made my mistake, there is where I could have stopped this, there is where I can stop it from happening again.

Maybe it shouldn’t have been something Tony tried to stop.

(or: the one where Tony is going to be responsible for once, okay? He is!)

• worth the word; by unsettled (@unsettledink), teen and up, 5’4k, oneshot

Valentine’s Day is not Peter’s favorite holiday by a long shot. And it’s not just because he’s a little jealous of everyone else showing off gifts from their partners.

But it’s still really nice that an unknown someone sent him a gift this year. Or two. Or— okay, this is getting out of hand.

• above and beyond; by unsettled (@unsettledink), E, 12’8k, oneshot - cw: incest/father-son incest

Trans Peter telling his dad that he’s never had an orgasm. And Tony eating Peter out until the boy’s oversensitive and crying out “dad” as he comes.

• still use work; by LearnedFoot (@learned-foot), E, 6’5k, oneshot

“In the spirit of scientific discovery,” Tony adds.

“Yeah, the spirit of scientific discovery, exactly.”

Or: Peter has a problem. Tony attempts to solve it. To be helpful, obviously. That’s the only reason.

• a familiar stranger; by Starker1975 (@starker1975), E, 132,1k, 21/21 chapters - cw: incest/father-son incest

Peter's tired of being single, but online dating scares him, so he creates a fake profile to scope out the playing field before fully committing. He isn't sure what to think when he sees his dad's profile on the app.

hope you like them as much as i did!

#starker reclist #check the tags #starker #starker fic #starker fic rec #starker fic recs #favourite starker fanfics

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the-au-thor · 5 months

Note

Holaaa

3ra pt al best friend blurb con spencer?

Fue re lindo 😭😭

Gracias!!

Awww! Que bueno que te gustó. Hoy me di un tiempo para escribir otra parte del Blurb. Espero que te guste!

We have another Spencer Reid x Bestfriend! Reader blurb. I hope you like it. Remember this is connected with #1 and #2 blurb. I didn't plan to do a whole story line about this but you know if you ask, you shall receive!

Bestfriend Blurb #3

Summary: You and Spencer are colleagues and best friends. Also you are super in love, you are just fools and don't know it yet.

Words: 1k

Warning: go to this link!

Spencer moved through the sea of people thickening at the entrance of the mall, consciously or unconsciously trying to avoid any physical contact. Going to a crowded mall after work wasn't exactly his idea of fun, but he had been craving the ice cream they sold at that italian ice-cream shop both of you had discovered in a secluded corner of the mall. Like him, you also had a problem with sugar that you didn't want to solve. He had invited you a little before leaving Quantico (The team had to work on a Saturday to submit the case they had finished the day before), but with a disappointed look, you had said you already had plans but promised to pick him up tomorrow at his apartment and go for ice cream. Of course, Spencer happily accepted, but that plan didn't mean he wouldn't go to the mall for his three-scoop ice cream today. No, it meant he would have his three-scoop chocolate chip ice cream today and tomorrow, and it would taste even better.

He climbed the escalators, enjoying the fact that he wasn't in a hurry to get anywhere or chasing something urgently. He buried his hands in his pants pockets and took a few steps on the mall's second floor, observing the crowd engrossed in their own affairs, carrying shopping bags, looking at shop windows, and being lured by some perfume sellers. Then, out of the corner of his eye, he saw a couple; he had his arm around the other person's neck as they laughed and carried bags. At that moment, he didn't know why he turned his gaze for a better view, but then he recognized you. He could recognize you with just a blur in his peripheral vision, and maybe just your presence tingling at the back of his neck.

When he saw you, you were smiling from ear to ear, and with your elbow, you playfully hit the man hugging you. He laughed and playfully stepped away from you. You shook your head, but you kept smiling. That scene hurt him more knowing that it wasn't just any man, but Derek.

That pain was accompanied by a pressure in his lower abdomen; he felt small pins digging into his temples and behind his ears. He wanted to run and separate you from Derek. But he also felt stressed; he wanted to run and leave. Suddenly, the good day he had had, along with his desire to eat that delicious ice cream, had vanished. He only saw you, laughing, with the person you had preferred to spend time with instead of Spencer. You had told Spencer that you would pick him up at his house in the morning to eat that ice cream and then go to the park for a walk and maybe kidnap J.J.'s kids to spend the afternoon with them. The prospect of spending a Sunday with you was enough to make Spencer happy his whole Saturday.

He loosened his fists and shook his hands gently in the air, trying to make the sudden sweat on his skin disappear. With a heavy breath and a tense body, he started walking towards the stairs leading to the first floor. He had no right to feel this way; you were his friend, his best friend. He loved you, and you loved him, but as best friends. However, an irrational voice inside him hated the fact that you were laughing with someone else, and someone else had you in their arms, and that person didn't know that you would prefer to eat ice cream from your favorite ice cream shop and go to a video game store to see which Funko Pop you could buy or where you would get inspiration for your costume for the next comic con, than spending your time strolling through the clothing and perfume area carrying Hugo Boss shopping bags. He hated himself because he should have said something to you that afternoon, he should have convinced you to go with him for that ice cream, and you should have thought that ice cream with Spencer was a thousand times better than laughing with Derek in front of a shop window. He just should have...

"Spencer?" he heard your voice behind him, addressing him with a smile. He turned to find you right behind him, lips curved and eyes playful. "I thought you were coming for your ice cream right after work," you added, turning to look at Derek, who was approaching with his bags. "Derek asked me to accompany him shopping. I didn't think I'd come here," you rolled your eyes when you felt Morgan giving your shoulder a playful shove.

"Hey, kid, what are you doing here alone?"

Spencer observed him seriously, trying to fake a relaxed expression so they wouldn't notice the growing anger boiling inside him. Then, his eyes landed on yours. Part of him wanted you to feel guilty, but guilty about what? You weren't doing anything wrong.

"I... came for ice cream," was his succinct response.

Derek looked at him carefully, and his gaze softened when he seemed to understand something that you, of course, were oblivious to.

"Boy, listen, I need your opinion. This young lady next to me says I shouldn't try any of my moves on my date tonight, but the hugging technique is foolproof, you know?"

"Date tonight?" Spencer's heart raced, not understanding. So, this wasn't an official date? Would they both have one tonight...? He was your friend! And this wasn't an exhibition of your photographs; this was a date with a colleague. Why hadn't you wanted to mention that detail to him?

"Yeah. You see, this male specimen is all confident because this new girl he met at a bar a few weeks ago fell for his charms." you added with a sarcastic smile.

"If she did it once, she can fall again, I'm just saying..." Derek tried to defend himself, but you interrupted him.

"I'm just saying that this girl is special and that he shouldn't use the techniques he used before with other girls" you emphasized, looking at Derek beside you, and then your face softened when your eyes returned to Spencer. "Savannah is the sweetest; Derek has been stalking her for days, and I managed to see her LinkedIn profile along with Penelope because he has refused to give much information," you laughed, crossing your arms. "So we proposed to advise him with an attractive outfit and an elegant perfume. Pen used her skills to get him a good table at a quiet restaurant, and this guy must promise to keep his hands to himself and leave the beautiful girl safe and sound in her apartment to ensure another date."

Spencer hesitated, somewhat stunned. He didn't know what to do with those wild jealousy that had taken over his body a minute ago. He had been a fundamental idiot.

"We proposed...?"

You opened your mouth to answer just as a shout from Penelope sounded from one of the perfume stands. The woman was walking on her huge heels with a smile on her face, holding a perfume sample between her fingers.

"This is it! It's perfect! Believe it, darling, you'll smell like some kind of luxury chocolate. She'll want to try it but still won't have enough space on her credit card to afford it. Believe me; she'll want more," Penelope stopped talking when she stood next to Derek and rubbed the perfume sample on Derek's neck, carrying the bags of her purchases in her arms. She stood on her toes to smell it and nodded excitedly. "Oh, this is it; I didn't know you could be more attractive until this perfume."

Derek and you watched her silently, amused, until Penelope became aware of Spencer's presence.

"Oh, Spencer," she murmured. "Have you joined our crusade?"

"No, we just ran into each other," Spencer tried to smile. "I just found out about Derek's date."

"And she's a good girl, dedicated to her work. We need to make this guy shine," Penelope affectionately tapped Derek's shoulder just in time for him to stretch his arm and make the same move he had done minutes before with you, precisely getting the same response; a playful laugh, a denial, and an elbow bumping him away disapprovingly. "Once again; nope. Let's go buy the perfume." Penelope dragged him along with her, looking at you. "Are you coming, sweetheart?"

You took a step towards Spencer and stood by his side, watching them with a smile.

"I think my job here is done. Can you handle it from here?" you asked Pen, who stretched a smile and nodded enthusiastically, bidding you farewell with a wave alongside Derek.

"Thanks, honey!"

You gave Derek a small military salute and smiled at Spencer. You buried your hands in the pockets of your flared jeans and played with the tips of your shoes. For a moment, he thought you would ask about his strange attitude from a few seconds ago, but you wouldn't put him in that kind of tight spot.

"You know? I really want ice cream. Shall we?" you shrugged, waiting for Spencer's response.

He observed you, finally being able to see you for real and not just what his jealousy had allowed him to see. He saw that smile that drove him crazy, and he also saw your cheeks slightly flushed. He saw your colorful sneakers, and he felt the happiness he had felt when he knew he would go for his favorite ice cream and this time wouldn't have to wait until Saturday to spend time with his favorite person. As both walked in comfortable silence, and your arm brushed against Spencer's, he smiled. The green jealousy that had filled his stomach had been replaced by another kind of creatures; these tickled him inside with a feeling of anticipation, but he didn't know why. You gave him a little nudge, which he returned, and after a moment of small courage, Spencer raised his arm behind your back and then pulled your body close to his, hugging your neck, imitating Derek. He made you laugh too; you also shook, but this time you didn't step away.

You continued walking beside him, and Spencer could have sworn you snuggled up.

Part 4

#spencer reid #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid x reader #criminal minds fanfic #criminal minds #dr spencer reid #spencer reid x bestfriend!reader #bestfriend blurb #jealous! spencer reid #friends to lovers #mutual pining

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theywhowriteandknowthings · 6 months

Text

Murder Daddy Kinktober 2023 Masterlist.

A full accounting of my work this Kinktober! I think I wrote over 50k! Wow! Please share and let me know what you thought of Kinktober this year! More parts below the cut! Warnings in RED, Please heed them. Pairings in PURPLE.

Day 1 - Trying something new – You’re a desperate Pharma Rep looking for an easy win. Doctor Joel Miller is anything but. [Doctor!Joel Miller x Pharma Rep!Reader. Fingering, degradation, power play, public sex/voyeurism]

Day 2 - Degradation – Fancisco Morales and Santiago Garcia have you right where they want you. [Frankie x You x Santi. Set in the Shore Leave Universe, MMF threesome, DP, degradation(obv), established relationship, PiV sex, no barrier protection(but reader is on undisclosed BC).]

Day 3 - “Daddy please?” – Your stepdad Dave York catches you in the act of making money through online sex work. The fic that inspired “The Princess and The Duke”. [Stepdad!Dave York x Reader. Cam work, sex work, blowjob, exhibitionism, sex on camera, taboo, stepcest, PiV sex, no barrier protection(but reader is on undisclosed BC).]

Day 4 - Outdoor sex/risk of being caught – You and Dave have been fooling around for some time now, and you try and push his buttons at a 4th of July party. “The Princess and The Duke” Universe. [Stepdad!Dave York x Reader. Angst, fluff, smut, risk of getting caught, PiV sex, no barrier protection(but reader is on undisclosed BC) heavy references to PTSD/Trauma.]

Day 5 - “Who does this belong to?” Javi crosses a line in your relationship and you make him pay for it. [Javier Peña x Reader. Bondage, orgasm denial, male masturbation, Javi is a brat, fluff and angst. [Bonus from @lucyeyelesbarrow]

Day 6 - Taboo – You get caught watching your stepdad going for a swim, and it gets you way too hot and bothered. Set in “The Princess and The Duke” Universe. [Stepdad!Dave York x Reader. Female masturbation, spying on Dave, almost getting caught.]

Day 7 - What happens in “x” stays in “x” (add your own

context) You get way too drunk in an unfriendly town, but Silva wants to look after you. Set in the “Walk Away” Universe (Sort of a prologue). [Silva x TransMasc!Reader, heavy angst, body dysmorphia, self-hatred, drinking, Silva being way too sweet, pigs?]

Day 8 - Bondage – Joel loves having you tied up and at his mercy. [No Outbreak!Joel Miller x Reader, Overstimulation, Bondage, mild sub/dom dynamics, ass play, anal sex, double penetration (fingers and dick), unproteted PiV (established relationship BS used), degradation/use of slut/whore)]

Day 9 - Ass play [I cheated and re-used a fic!] You move into a dilapidated mansion after inheriting it from a family member. Joel and Tommy offer to fix it up for you. [Vampire!Joel x You x Vampire!Tommy. DDNI, Dead Dove Do not Eat, This is a dark fic, it’s twisted af, Joel and Tommy are vampires, that murder people, reader is their next victim, threat of death to reader, Joel is mean and fucking nasty in this, so is Tommy, drug use, dubcon(reader is drugged/high on pheremones), coercion, mouth fucking, unprotected PiV, Creampie, anal sex, rimming, throat fucking, ass play, double penetration, reader begs for her life, mind-fuck, mind-break, seriously dubcon/bordering on non-con, degredation, blood play, vampire biting, swallowing dacryphilia, let me know if I missed anything! Enjoy you beautiful THOTs.]

Day 10 - Toys Javi gets you back for the events of “Who does this belong to?” – [Javier Peña x Reader. Overstimulation, wand vibrator, unprotected PiV(Do Better), Papi Kink, Dom!Javi, Sub!reader, spanking, choking(mild), degradation (lots of it, Javi has a filthy mouth), come play(sort of??), bratty reader. Mentions of Infidelity and male masturbation]

Day 11 - Boss/employee (dubcon??) You dress up specially for Max at the office Halloween party. [Max Phillips x Reader. Failed SA on Reader, followed by a swift kick to the balls, Vampires, blood drinking, vampire bites, unprotected PiV(Please wrap it up), slight dubcon(reader isn't drunk but has been drinking), mild threat to reader (vampire sex yo.), blood loss, Max is a softdom,]

Day 12 - CNC (roleplay) You get caught out by a Raider, Joel Miller, in an old grocery store. He takes what he wants, as always. [Raider!Joel Miller x Reader. DDDNI, This is pretty Dark, Roleplay, It's all consensual but it is CNC(Consensual Non-Consent), Vaginal Fingering, gun play, knife play, struggle, threat of r*pe, threat around anal, Joel Miller's fucking mouth, degradation, slut shaming.]

Day 13 - Facial Set in the “Rendezvous in Reno” universe. Dieter gets to try something he’s been dying to do for months, fuck your tits. [Dieter Brave x Erotica Writer!Reader. Face-sitting, face-riding, tit-job/tit-wank/tit-fucking, established relationships, Dieter being a menace, Dieter is a tit man, fluff and plot, fluff and feelings, Dieter is technically a murder daddy because he murders that pussy.]

Day 14 - Phone sex – Set in “The Princess and The Duke” Universe. [Dave York x Reader. Phone sex/dirty talk, Daddy kink, angst, catching feelings, really fucking angsty]

Day 15 - Cousin’s husband’s maid’s brother (wildcard prompt

so have fun/go wild with weird ideas) – The neighbour’s gardener is a no-show, but his brother turns up instead. [No Outbreak!Joel Miller x Reader. Degradation, rough blowjob, no real prep for reader, Joel's mouth, panty sniffing, dirty talk.]

Day 16 - Aphrodisiac/sex pollen You and your least-favourite, but hot as fuck, patrol partner get stuck in an old FEDRA testing site, but you’re not alone. [Jackson!Joel x Reader Dead Dove Do Not Eat/DDDNI, noncon/heavy dubcon, body horror, tentacles, mouth r*pe, double/triple penetration, bondage, non-consensual bondage, choking, deep throating, pheromones, sex pollen, tentacles, mind fuck/mind break, brainwashing, guilt, trauma, trauma bonding.]

Day 17 - “Why do you run, only to let me catch you?” You’ve been on the run from Din Djarin for years but just over a year ago he stopped chasing you… Until tonight. [Din Djarin x Fugitive!Reader. PiV sex, unprotected sex, mutual pining, grogu being a sessy bitch, blood, addiction mentions, addiction, oral F&M recieving, Whiny Din Supremacy.]

Day 18 - Knife Play [ @Clawdeewritesfanfic Subbed in to save the day!]

Day 19 - “So much cum, fuck!” [@Clawdeewritesfanfic Subbed in to save the day! (Again!)]

Day 20 - Breeding kink – Dave York has a breeding kink. [Duke!Dave York x Princess!Reader Daddy Kink, Breeding Kink, creampie, sub/dom dynamics, Dirty Talk, PiV sex (no barrier protection), Carol is mentioned but relationship is amiable.]

Day 21 - Shuffle for a Kesha/Dua Lipa/Charlotte Cardin song

& use the title as inspo – Dave and you finally get round to fucking. (Technically a remix of Daddy Please, but set in “The Princess and The Duke” Universe. [Duke!Dave York x Princess!Reader - Daddy Kink, Sex Work, Cam work, Infidelity, Step-Cest, Dave York(he always needs his own warning), Possessive!Dave, Men being sexist dicks on the internet, choking, degradation, rough sex, rough oral sex, exhibitionism.]

Day 22 - Thigh riding You and Javi have some fun with those deliciously thick thighs of his. [Javier Peña x Reader. Nipple play, spanking, sub/dom dynamics, thigh riding, reader is a brat, degradation.]

Day 23 - Drunk sex Set after “Hurt so Good” Frankie helps you out of your shoes when you’re struggling after a night our drinking. [Vampire!Frankie x Reader. Drunk Reader (dubcon but established relationship), Twilight references (to piss off Frankie) Vampire sex, Vampire bites, Unprotected PiV (sort of), vampire vibes, oral F receiving, biting, vampire bites.]

Day 24 - Safeword – A collection of the various Safewords our PPCU boys use.

Day 25 - Pegging – Joel agrees to let you peg him, because it’s something you want. It doesn’t go quite to plan. [No Outbreak!Joel Miller x Reader. Pegging, anal fingering, handjobs, implied female oral, Joel Miller’s ego, Joel Miller’s Lack of communication skills, hurt/comfort, angst (happy ending heheh), insecurities around masculinity (implied), self-hatred/shame, sub!Joel, dom!reader, strap-on use, butt plug use, lots of lube, SO MUCH CUM! ]

Day 26 - Somnophilia – Javi wakes up to you humping your pillow in your sleep, it awakens something dark inside him. [Javi G x Reader. Warnings: Somnophilia, sleep sex, consensual somnophilia, Javi having dark thoughts, cnc, consensual non-consent (if you squint), Javi being a bad boy, dry humping/pillow humping, wet dreams, unprotected PiV (wrap it up folks)].

Day 27 - Costumes – Fluffy drabbles for our PPCU boys in costume.

Day 28 - “You trying to get me fired?” – You finally get Miguel to give in and just fuck you already. [Office/Lawyer AU!Miguel x Reader. Warnings: Office AU/Lawyer AU, Office romance/sex, co-workers, sexual tension, voyeurism, fingering, dirty talk, the whole office definitely heard, unprotected PiV (wrap it up folks).]

Day 29 - Picture perfect – Part 2/3 of “Creep”. You get sick and tired of waiting for your creepy neighbour to make an appearance, so you take matters into your own hands. [Creepy Neighbour!Joel Miller x Twisted!Reader. This is a dark fic, it’s twisted af, Joel is a creep, Joel is mean and fucking nasty in this, dubcon(Reader touching Joel in his sleep), coercion, degredation(lots of Joel calling Reader a slut/whore etc.), (heavy)stalker vibes.]

Day 30 - Pumpkin Spice [Combining with the below fic for release sometime this week]. Day 31 - Freaky Love (fluff with a monster I know I’m sappy - Combined fluffy smut with Max.

And nce again - big shout out to @pr0ximamidnight @beskarandblasters @wannab-urs @patti7dc @beefrobeefcal @pastelnap @reaperofmen @jksprincess10 @clawdee @covetyou @strang3lov3 @lucyeyelesbarrow @gasolinerainbowpuddles @king-simp and the rest of my wonderful moots (sorry if I missed y’all my brain is soup) for being top tier in supporting me in this crazy as fuck endeavour.

Join my taglist here

@ktheunready @harriedandharassed @survivingandenduring @neverwheremoonchild @noisynightmarepoetry @casa-boiardi @xoxabs88xox @guelyury @its-nebuleuse @deadly-femme-bimbo @christinamadsen @mirandablue1 @clawdee @youandmeand5bucks-blog @hiddenbabynyc @stevie75 @star017 @vabeachazn @darkheartgatita @anoverwhelmingdin @pedroshotwifey @bitchwitch1981 @dameron-grant-spector @livingdeadmaria @cantbenameds-blog @nashja @robertpattinsoninthetracksuit

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gentlebeardsbarngrill · 15 days

Text

04/10/2024 Daily OFMD Recap

TLDR; Ruibo Qian; Kristian Nairn; Gypsy Taylor/Big Gay Energy Podcast; GlaadForOFMD; Daily Calendar; Watch Party Reminders; Fan Spotlight: Cast Cards; Never Left; Our Flag Means Fanfiction: Re: Izzy's Ring; Stede Quotes Twitter Polls; Mini Love Notes; Daily Darby; Today's Taika.

= Ruibo Qian =

Just a cute pic from our favorite Pirate queen. That hair <3 Img Src: Ruibo Qian's IG

= Kristian Nairn =

Wanna check out the new music? Visit: Kristian's Linktr.ee

Kristian also confirmed he'll be joining @/comicconnordics May 3-5 in Stockholm! For more info, visit Comic Con Nordic

== Gypsy Taylor / Big Gay Energy Pod ==

@adoptourcrew Was kind enough to do a much bigger breakdown of the Gypsy Taylor interview on @biggayenergypod's Podcast. If you haven't given it a listen already, please visit: If you're a reader as opposed to a listener, here's AdoptOurCrew's IG stills regarding it. (Read from left image to right, down, left to right, etc)

== GLAAD For OFMD ==

If you haven't voted for OFMD on the GLAAD fan favorites, please do! Did you know you can vote with multiple emails or even the same email? Well you can! Please click here!

== Event Calendar ==

Today is another Vacation today-- but think about what you'd like to share for #WhyWatchOFMD tomorrow!

== Watch Party Reminders! ==

== Flight Of the Conchords ==

Today we're on Season 1 Ep 7 and 8. Join OFMD Crew, and @iamadequate1 this week for Flight of the Conchords watch parties! You can watch each day at 4pm PT, 7 pm ET, 11pm BST! If you don't have access, feel free to join us on the #RhysDarbyFaction Discord server, you can hit me up for an invite.

Hashtags:

#FlagOfTheConchords

#OurFlagMeansDeath

== Taskmaster NZ ==

*Please Note*: @ineffablecollision was kind enough to let us know of some desyncing issues! Thanks friend!

"During the TMNZ watch party, depending on where you watch, you *will* get desynced! I don't know if TVNZ kept the ad break bumpers, but Ch4 has one missing (TMNZ has four ad breaks compared to TMUK's three, so they cut to fit), and YT has them cut altogether!"

Series 1 continues Friday at 11am PT / 2 pm ET / 7 pm BST on any of the @saveofmdcrewmates socials.

#Quartermaster

#OurFlagMeansDeath

Taskmaster

== Fan Spotlight ==

= Cast Cards =

Today's cast card is Boris McGiver, aka Father Bonnet! Thanks @melvisik for making sure he gets a spotlight as well! I personally enjoyed him in Person of Interest!

== Never Left ==

New Never Left episode! Part 4 of the Beautiful Princess Disorder! Please give it a listen if you have the time! Never Left Linktr.ee

Artwork by @AmyBirdHouse

== Our Flag Means Fanfiction ==

Have you been wondering what all the buzz is about regarding Con's ring? Where it's coming from is the Our Flag Means Fanfiction podcast which was linked on a previous day.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Our Flag Means Fanfiction (@ourflagmeansfanfiction)

instagram

If you get a chance, please give it a listen, there's some interesting news. Here's a short clip if you can't listen to the full episode:

RingaSunn Twitter (if you don't have twitter and wanna give it a listen shoot me a quick dm, but if you can, listen to the podcast episode!)

== Next Round of Stede Quotes ==

@iamadequate1 Has been running a twitter poll bracket on Stede's best quotes! Wanna weigh in? Visit Twitter.

== LOVE NOTES ==

Hey lovelies, I'm still swamped. Worked really late, got up early cause kid wasn't sleeping well. Gonna send some love note images that made me smile yesterday. Hope you're all doing well an having a good week. Sending love <3

img src @ ozo.art IG

Img Src: @ positivelypresent's IG

Img Src: @MadameHalloween's IG

Img Src: @_.hurtt's IG

== Daily Darby / Today's Taika ==

No theme, just goof.

Darby Gif Courtesy of @fandomsmeantheworldtome

Taika Gif Courtesy of @gattonswood

#Instagram #daily ofmd recap #daily ofmd recaps #ofmd daily recap #ofmd daily recaps #ruibo qian #our flag means fanfiction #kristian nairn #never left podcast #gypsy taylor #big gay energy podcast #bts

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a-tiny-teez · 4 months

Text

Behind the scenes

Yandere Director OC X Fem reader

Part 1

Warning : 18+ content,MDNI, age gap, yandere themes, kidnapping,power imbalance, implied non-con, slight slow burn, reader is in her mid twenties and yandere Director is in his late thirties.

1:34 AM

The sound of the clock ticking away could be heard as you continue to type away on the keyboard.The last few scenes of the work you've been working on are going to be completed and with new inspiration you continue . Pulling all nighters , dumping strong coffee in your system and an unhealthy amount of rest has been your life for the last six months.

The purrs of your beloved cat taking your attention for a slight bit was actually quite good for your eyes as looking at a screen for a long time strained your eyes heavily. You looked at your cat with a smile. “ Just a bit left baby ”.It wasn't that you had a deadline. It's just that you loved your work. Your friends often made jokes about your intense workaholic routine but you just laughed them off.

“ At this point you're gonna have to marry your own character” , your friend Becky said laughing.

“ Wouldn't be bad you know” ,you smirked at her and she shook her head with a smile.

Being a playwright was your dream that you accomplished just a few years ago. Doing part time jobs and studying were most of the things you did during your college days. So although you were completely new to this field of work , you have gained quite a good amount of fame. Some of your work has been appreciated by the audience and the rookie playwright of the year award was a great feat of accomplishment of your whole life.

Now back to present, with the last word typed away you save your work and then send it to your beta to recheck everything. Stretching your arms out you yawned and finally stood up. Going over to your kitchen and opening a cabinet you pulled out a microwave ramen and decided to settle for it tonight. You decided tomorrow you'd go grocery shopping as you shivered watching the sorry state of fridge. After a few minutes you had your ramen while watching the tv . There was nothing much going on the tv at this time so you settled for a documentary show that was being re-broadcasted.

Oh , it's him. You thought as you slurped on the noodles. Spicey just as you liked it. The documentary was about a famous film director. You had seen him a few times during award shows. He was one of the most successful directors of the time and all of his films were successful as he got the best director awards quite a few times. It must be fate now that you came across this because you were just thinking about sending him your work. You doubted it'd be accepted but still it's worth a shot. You gotta keep trying in this field of job.

Hoping you'd at least have your work checked by him you turned off the TV and dumped the trash in the garbage can. Then after cleaning up you went to bed to get the sleep you very much needed.

____________________

“ I've finished rechecking. It's all good to send. Be assured”, said your beta, Alan .

“Alright. Done” you said clicking the send button. Now if it's accepted you'd get to meet the director and it'll be made into a film. Your genre this time matched with the kind of works he worked on so you hoped your work will get at least the recognition.

“ Man I hope I'll get accepted”

“ Don't worry. I have a good feeling about this and you worked really hard on this so don't lose hope” , reassured Alan. You smiled at him and hoped for the best.

“You wanna get lunch ? My treat.” You asked.

“Why not? Can't say no to free food”, he sheepishly smiled.

Alan was like your little brother. He's been with you ever since your first work and over the time you two bonded as if he was family. He was still a student from your alma mater and he looked up to you a lot. You were happy to have him appreciate you cause there were times when you felt despair but he was the one who always helped you get through tough times.

After eating and bidding Alan goodbye you went to the grocery store. Walking towards the aisle you remembered what you needed and put them in the cart. A carton of milk, eggs, vegetables, sausages ,Nutella oh and you were about to run out of coffee so a jar of coffee. Okay , that's all from here . Then you bought some cooking spices and other necessities. Checking everything you went to the cashier. Paying for everything you went out the store and a cold breeze passed by making you shiver. October was ending and it was getting colder. You pulled your coat closer and loaded your car then drove away to home as you planned on making dinner and having hot chocolate later.

_____________________

2 days later

The sound of luminary playing in the background could be heard as you were cleaning out your closet and filling it with warm clothes. It was one of your favourite soundtracks. It was just so beautiful and gave you lots of ideas.

You remember the earlier phone call. You still couldn't believe it. Dominic Albero read your script and he wanted to have a meeting with you. His assistant called and made you aware about the appointment which is tomorrow night. You're so happy right now. You can't believe your work got recognized by THE director everyone wants to work with. You informed Alan about this and boy was he so enthralled with the situation. He wished you best of luck for tomorrow and you decided you'd celebrate with him if your work gets adapted tomorrow.

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phlurrii · 3 months

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Hihi there!!!! I Hope You don’t mind me sending in an ask, but I’m planning on doing the glitch that allows you to transfer the glitch Mew from Red & Blue to Pokémon HOME that you talked about in this post;

https://www.tumblr.com/phlurrii/715585175997825024/okay-were-2-day-late-but

And I was wondering if you could elaborate on what you meant by them loosing their nicknames??? Do all transferred Pokémon from Red/Blue loose their nicknames, or is it just Mew???? And how did you change it back??

Again I really really hope you don’t mind this ask!!!!! I know it’s a really random one but I came across your post when researching for this glitch to make sure I had everything prepared and I’m pretty Attatched to the name I gave my Mew!!!!

Nah I don’t mind at all! Lowkey I thrive off talking about glitches, if you let me I’ll ramble for hours and refuse to let you leave. So I am much more than happy to help ;D

Okay! So regarding the nickname, sadly yes, bank will auto remove all nicknames from any Pokémon off virtual consoles. Whether it’s RBGY or SGC, that shit gets dunked upon transfer. I did not know that initially and was devastated when I found out. However, there ARE solutions to fixing it!

1) Hacked 3DS console, if you know or can find someone with a hacked 3DS you can trade them your lil guy and they can change the name. Obviously the cons of this is the person could scam you, take the mew, and dip. So I highly suggest cloning your mew through any means necessary before handing over a copy. This is what I did, I have a handful of backups of my goobers in general as well.

1.5) if you want to clone your goobers, you can buy a Power Save Pro for 3DS games and clone them there, or you can clone your mew in Pokémon Red… however this is SUPER risky and can corrupt and erase your entire save file. This happened to me once, but if you have no other choice… then I wish you luck solider.

2) transfer your goober up to switch and locate someone with a modded switch, they can do the same thing. Nickname it, send it back. Again I suggest cloning before hand, if you have a cloning egg in SWSH or know someone who does, that’s your best bet. If you don’t, you may have to risk it. However there are people on Reddit who charge like 2-3 bucks to nickname pokemon. I’ve done it before, but frankly I’m looking into just getting a modded switch lol

3) Poke Hex, this is the most complicated way, as it requires a computer, an extra device, dumping your 3DS file onto it, and going into your games code to re-nickname the mew via this lovely program called pokehex. This was originally the method I planned on, but had a nice bloke offer to help me. The good part about this method is it’s entirely just you, no trading or 3rd parties. They have a dedicated forum for assisting too ^^

In summary, there is not an easy way to do it, but if your a nut case like me you’ll find a way or hell will freeze over X3

I’ll also offer my own SWSH cloning egg to help if you can find someone with a modded switch, cuz frankly I need that hook up as well lol, anywho I wish you luck on the gameboy mew adventures ;3

#ask #mew #pokemon #mew pokemon #pokémon mew #glitch #mew glitch #long trainer glitch #mew glitch Pokémon red #legal mew #legal mew glitch #poke bank #poke transfer

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dksw0rld · 1 year

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Things I’ve Learned As A Young Woman

I’m in my (almost) mid 20s, I turn 25 in a few weeks. Since my birthday is coming up I’ve been reflecting on things I’ve learned as I always do in the weeks leading up. I want this blog to be a safe space for women to learn and grow in community so I wanted to share some of the lessons and pass them on to others.

Health

1. Consult with your doctor(s) before starting any sort of diet, no matter how good you may think it will be for you

At the end of the day, the internet is not a doctors office. You don’t know how a diet could personally affect you, as a woman and / or as a human. You don’t know if trying a certain diet will deprive you of a vitamin you’re already deficient in. You don’t know if that diet is good for your reproductive health in the long run.

2. Tying into point 1, always get your yearly check ups (blood panel, obgyn checkups, yearly physical, dental cleanings, etc.)

A lot can change in a year. You don’t know what could have developed, what you could have become deficient in, what you need less of, etc. if you don’t get your yearly checkups done. Staying informed and up to date is one of the best ways to combat anything that could come up, benign or not. Keeping up with your health is the highest form of self care!!

3. Speak to your doctor(s) extensively AND do your own medically backed research before choosing to go on birth control (and seriously consider other options first)

I know this can be a bit of a taboo topic but quite frankly I don’t care. Doctors nowadays are VERY quick to push birth control onto women without educating them on all the side effect, ways it can affect our bodies with long term use AND what can happen when you get off of the pill. I understand a lot of you want to partake in sex without having to worry (more on that in another point...) or you want to take it for other reasons not pertaining to sex but the healthiest way is to naturally keep track of your cycle and ovulation schedule. No one told me the issues I would have taking birth control for years and then getting off. I didn’t even start taking it to have safe sex, I started taking it when I as 16 because of the bad period symptoms I was having and to help control my acne. When I finally got off of it, my hormones were a wreck and I was diagnosed with PMDD thanks to the birth control wrecking my hormones. It took me literal months of research and trial and error to naturally re-balance my hormones. 9.5 times out of 10 taking birth control is just not worth it. Before you decide, please make sure you weigh all of the pros and cons and look into other options.

4. Please be careful what you are putting in AND on your body

We are in a day and age where there are chemicals in and on everything. As women, a lot of these things mess with our hormones, our reproductive health and overall health. You have to do the work of reading labels on food products, researching if anything in your household products are harmful, purchasing all natural products when possible (makeup, cleaning products, candles, air sprays, etc.), and making as many things at home as you can (air sprays, cleaning solution, food, etc.). The companies making these harmful products are not going to tell us the risks. They’re just not. The detergent company you’re using to wash your intimates is not going to tell you how the chemicals they’re putting in their detergent is going to make your hormones unbalanced when you wear the underwear you washed with it. It is up to you as a woman to watch out for anything that can be harmful to your health. I wish it wasn’t that way but it is.

Mental Health

1. Stress and Anxiety are real and can really affect your body negatively

The affects of anxiety and stress are real. They can wreck havoc on the body. Find activities that help channel it. Journal. Speak to a therapist. Let go of what you cannot control. Research if what you’re consuming is helping contribute to the issue.

2. Therapy does not make you weak

There is literally no shame in speaking to a therapist and anyone who thinks so needs to grow up. It’s actually extremely responsible and mature to make the decision to speak to someone to become a better you. You don’t even need to have gone through a traumatic experience to speak to someone. Therapy guides you in digging deep about every “why”. Why you respond the way you do, why you think the way you do, why you love that thing so much, what made you who you are today. Everyone can benefit from therapy in some way.

3. Your diet plays a part in your mental health

The mind-gut connection is real. What you put into your body has an affect on your mental health, especially as a woman. Yet another reason why it’s so crucial to know what you are putting into and on your body. Take it from someone who spent months and months naturally balancing her hormones. It matters.

Relationships

1. Stop sleeping with just anyone. That’s not being “liberated”.

I’m going to tell you right now. Stop. Your flower is extremely sacred. Letting anyone and everyone have access to it is not being a liberated woman. It’s actually trapping you into the mindset that being treated with the bare minimum (aka how you should always be treated by a man or woman) equals sex. If a man takes you out and doesn’t ask to split the bill you’re about ready to give it all to him on the first date because “he’s rare”. No. Number one, men like that are not rare, you’re just looking in the wrong places and / or entertaining low value men. Number two, men automatically see that as “oh so all I have to do is treat her with the bare minimum, she’ll eat it up and I can smash her”. Sorry, but it’s true. That type of treatment I just named is the BARE minimum. How a man or woman should treat you every single time of every single day. You have no idea how that man actually is from one or two dates. He could be putting on a show hoping to get in your pants. Honestly, that’s most likely what he is doing. And if he’s not, why give one of the most important part of yourself so soon? You’re just that easy to impress? Stop! A man worth giving time to knows how to control his sexual urges and will not ask you to have sex on the first few dates. Honestly, the men worth giving time to will wait for you to feel comfortable enough to bring it up, they won’t even mention it! Or on the other hand, if you’re sleeping with just anyone because you want to be a “liberated woman” who wants to express her sexuality freely, true liberation comes from being picky about who you choose to share yourself with and feeling safe and seen enough to share it with them. How do you feel after you have sex with someone in the name of being “liberated”? Once the hormones settle I bet you feel like crap. Let’s also mention that you don’t know who else they’ve slept with. You don’t know what someone else they slept with has. You’re genuinely putting your health at risk every time you choose to share yourself with someone you barely know. Not to mention you’re risking making another human with a man you don’t even know would be a good father, if he chooses to acknowledge he’s the father at all (harsh, I know, but unfortunately very true). And if you do know them, you should feel comfortable enough to ask them about their sexual history, when the last time they got checked was AND to show you proof they are free of any STIs. If not, then you shouldn’t be sleeping with them. If they refuse or make excuses, you definitely shouldn’t be sleeping with them!

2. Stop looking for love, let it find you

I won’t lie to you, this one took me a while to learn. But I’ve mastered it now. Love is not something you find. I truly believe that. Love finds you when you are ready for it. Whether that be forever love or a love that’s meant to teach you and prepare you for the next level of life and eventually the next love. I was on dating apps on and off for years. I believe dating apps can help you gain experience and help you meet new people but in my opinion I don’t think they’re conducive to finding your forever love. There are exceptions to that just like there are to everything but I believe letting love find you when it’s meant to is the best way to do it. Now if you genuinely feel like you’re being called to use dating apps to find love than by all means do so, but do the work first and make sure it’s not just because you feel lonely, left out, impatient to find your person, or are afraid to be alone. I had to be honest with myself and say that I was on dating apps because I was being impatient. And after digging deeper into that I realized it was one of the reasons I was still single. I wasn’t letting love unfold when it was supposed to, I was looking for it and forcing it. You can’t force love no matter how hard you try. Since being honest with myself, I found that I would much rather find my love interests organically. Not having to force it by swiping right solely based on how the person looks and a shallow glance into their interests. If I meet someone with potential at a bookstore, I already know we have something in common, a love of reading. Plus, there is so much more to life than a romantic relationship. Focus on you and creating your ideal life. Date yourself. Treat yourself how you want someone to treat you one day. I know we’ve all heard those so much but there’s a reason for it, they’re true! Love will find you when it’s supposed to. What’s for you will never pass you.

These are some of the many lessons I’ve learned on my journey. I truly hope at least some of these taught you something or rang true for you. If so, send me a message I’d love to hear. Or if you have any questions on any of the topics I touched on, send me a message and I’ll expand on it!

With love,

#lessons #dk #womens health #highvalueblackwoman #wellness #health and wellness

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helianthus-tarot · 2 years

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FUTURE SPOUSE: Their shadow side and how it affects romantic relationship

This can also be applied to long-term partner. For this reading, the shadow side is not only our darkest side. It can also be the parts of us we are ashamed of or see as bad, our Achilles' heel, the parts we project onto others, qualities we suppress/reject, or parts of us that subconsciously influence our actions without us realizing it. Although I expected the reading to be intense, it turns out to not be dark at all haha. So no extreme things here, just human. Take what resonates and leave what doesn’t; the message may be for someone else, or there may be no message for you in this reading.

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Instructions:

Think about your person and focus on the topic. Take your time. Choose a number/picture that you feel the most drawn to or that you can’t stop looking at. Trust your intuition. May the message resonate. Let me know which pile you choose!

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PILE 1

Their shadow side Ace of Cups, Knight of Pentacles (The Hermit), Ace of Wands

I think this person has a tendency to be... careful? conscientious? about things they start or any opportunity that comes their way. In this case, a relationship. Instead of allowing some aspects of the situation or themselves to follow the flow, they may feel like they need to be practical, structured, logical and/or studious about it. I’m getting the feeling of “it should be done in a certain way” from this person. It’s like someone who rations their favorite dessert, despite them really liking that dessert they only take a small bite every day because they think that’s the best way to have it.

There is an emotional undercurrent here, but your person has a tendency to not fully embrace their inner fire and emotions (they structure or contain these instead, in some way). They may also project this onto others and think that other people tend to follow emotions and make decisions impulsively. The funny thing is, while they don’t act rashly, they also have a tendency to over-invest their mental energy in things that haven’t started yet (or things that haven’t been properly grounded in reality?). Knight of Pentacles is earth but it’s also associated with Virgo, which is echoed by The Hermit. It’s like a person who considers the pros and cons of getting into a relationship with a single parent when they haven’t even had any conversation with that person yet. Your person may also struggle with adaptability and openness; the qualities are there, but it’s like, the qualities are not channeled healthily or with balance, something is skewed somewhere.

How it affects their romantic relationships in general 7 of Swords, King of Swords (Wheel of Fortune)

Those qualities are not bad per se; being practical, logical and measured is good. But it may cause your person to be slow in acting on opportunities and passionate encounters that come their way, despite them wanting it, because they just have to plan and think about all the ways it can possibly turn out and what is the best way to go at it. It feels like someone who wants to control their fate with all human intelligence that they have because they want things to work, to the point that it may sabotage the end goal. Maybe your person thinks that this is the only way to make a relationship or an opportunity a success.

They get very strategic and logical with their steps in relationships. They may also be skeptical of things or people who sound optimistic or “too good to be true”. This person has a tendency to not tell their partner/suitor about their moves and plans (perhaps it’s just a habit, or perhaps they think it’s something they have to deal with alone) but this will only make them look detached, distant, mysterious and/or analytical about their relationship to their partner or potential romantic suitors. So it may make the other person wonder if your person feels the passion/emotion. It may be difficult for the other person to emotionally connect with them (vice versa).

How it will affect your relationship with them Queen of Swords, The Fool

They will approach your connection from a place of logic or skepticism, at least in the early stage. Talking to them may feel like they are trying to analyze or investigate you. If you want them to immediately fall head over heels for you and follow their heart and be all romeo-and-juliet with you, they probably won’t. With the Queen here, I think they will lower their guard with you, perhaps without realizing it (so there is a chance for an emotional connection to form), but they will not be completely open either. They just need to investigate you first.

If you are more lighthearted than this person (less pedantic or not as extreme), if you are someone who is able to follow your heart or the flow, then keep being in that energy. But don’t be a doormat, respond to their method without a heavy emotional attachment on your part (tip: look at how air signs do it). Don’t be too attached to them right away because it may hurt you when they are still in their logic about it. Give them time and space, live your life, but don’t intentionally do things that can give them reasons to distrust you if this is not who you are (eg. flirting with people who give you attention just to make them jealous, when you are normally not like this). They need to understand what they are dealing with before they can take a leap, you just need to show up and stay true to yourself.

PILE 2

Their shadow side 7 of Cups, 6 of Swords, 5 of Swords, 3 of Swords

To summarize, I’m getting that this person does well in the early stage of a connection, but they may have issues with maintaining or solidifying that. It’s like... they are used to the feeling of transition– something not here and not there– being in limbo. It may give them some kind of comfort (because it’s familiar), despite it may also bring problems into their life. They may have gotten used to this feeling because of a lack of stability and consistency in their early life. I wonder if this person has never had long-term relationships, I don’t think they know how to deal with a connection once it moves past a certain stage– because a lot of their relationships didn't go that far OR whenever a relationship is about to enter that deeper stage, they sabotage it without realizing it.

I feel like this person doesn’t really know how to communicate their vulnerable thoughts (or topics that make them feel vulnerable); eg. things that make them sad, things that they are worried about, how their past experiences have influenced their current tendencies, what they need, etc– all of those things that are needed in order to form a deeper connection. It may be related to trust issues, anxiety, needing reassurance but needing space, wanting to connect but being unable to. Instead of directly talking about their situation– they may ‘attack’ the other person with words that can trigger an argument, or they distance themselves from the other person and when the other person asks about it– they get annoyed. It’s like Aquarius and Scorpio mix, desiring intimacy but at the same time being distant. They may project this onto other people as other people being too attached too soon (or seeing things that aren't there), too smothering, or other people just don’t understand them.

How it affects their romantic relationships in general 8 of Cups, Queen of Wands, Ace of Pentacles

I did talk a bit about this part in the previous paragraph. But to continue, your person may also look charming at first, very engaging and curious, they are great at starting a connection or ‘igniting the fire’ so to speak. Probably a good flirt. Receiving their attention may make people feel special. The phrase ‘loving the chase’, this person is quite similar to that. So people start to expect more or want to get into a relationship with them. But once that happens, their issues start to come out.

Whether they realize this or not, they are great at making people fall in love with them and giving the impression that a stable relationship with them is possible, yet they are probably unaware that once the relationship gets deeper and more emotional, they find it hard to maintain it. This person feels more comfortable leaving (especially when pressured) than connecting properly– where all shameful parts of themselves get exposed. They probably have a fearful-avoidant attachment style, there are combinations of avoidant and anxious tendencies.

How it will affect your relationship with them The Sun Rx, The Devil, Justice, 7 of Pentacles Rx, 2 of Swords

You can easily get addicted to their energy or their attention, or whatever opportunity and possibility they represent when you are in their presence. For many of you, your person has a knack for making it seem like they are opening their soul and connecting on a deeper level with you, with people in general– but actually they don’t. I don’t think they realize it. I think it’s just the effect they have on other people when they pay attention or when they talk about something with those people. You may sense something deeply personal or intimate from what they share with you, like you get a taste of what else is possibly there in their soul, which can make you want more of it. Like that Venus-Pluto effect. This is also probably what happens to other people who are interested in them.

I think the way to avoid being stuck in this addiction is to be logical about it. Focus on what they actually give you instead of what it feels like they are giving you. Regardless of your gender and sexuality, there is that advice that is often given to women who are interested in men. The advice is to focus on what is clear. If he hasn’t said it and hasn’t actually done it, it means it’s not there and won’t be there until the foreseeable future where he actually takes appropriate actions. Until then, do not be attached. Be clear about what you want, communicate that, and let them make the decision. Don’t wait around or else you may get stuck in limbo that they are comfortable with.

PILE 3

Their shadow side King of Wands, Ace of Wands, 9 of Wands (8 of Swords), 5 of Pentacles (The Emperor)

Your person may be the type who does extravagant or romantic things for their partner, eg. making sure there are rose petals in the room they booked for your vacation, or booking a romantic dinner for two by the beach, planning their date from morning to evening. They initiate, they make things happen. It doesn’t sound like a shadow side, does it? It is tho. Because this person internalizes rejection or things going wrong as their fault; their lack of control, their lack of determination, their inability to love properly, etc.

It’s interesting because you have strong masculine energy here (regardless of gender), but there is also fear of abandonment, anxiety. It reminds me of the ‘waiting for the other shoe to drop’ idiom, but the difference is, instead of waiting, this person goes out and tries their best to make sure the shoe– doesn’t drop. This fear is the drive behind their proactive actions. They think that in order to prevent undesirable outcomes, they need to control the situation and bend it in a way that can make their vision/dream a reality. So if they visualize a future with someone, they will do whatever it takes to make sure that future happens.

How it affects their romantic relationships in general 7 of Swords, 10 of Wands, 5 of Swords Rx

If they have a partner who does not return the same energy, the relationship can get heavily one-sided. They may be the one who takes care of everything, who manages every problem in the relationship. They are probably outwardly masculine and a go-getter, and I don’t want to use this word because it sounds kinda harsh– but they can also be a doormat. Not because of a lack of strength. It’s because they care a lot, it's because they love, it's because they are invested in the future they see and the life they want. It’s like they have an optimistic fiery inner child who gets so excited about the act of loving itself, about doing things with the other person, about experiencing life with the other person. Even if it requires them to take the blame, to carry the burden, to suppress their needs and hold back their thoughts, to not start an important conversation because their partner may turn it into an argument.

I wonder if this person has been in a toxic relationship before, with a partner who took advantage of their proactiveness and passion. I’m getting the image of someone who wants to be treated like a queen/king but instead of giving back the same energy to your person and appreciates their effort, the partner expects it and throws tantrums or makes things difficult for your person when they don’t get their way. And your person gives in as much as they can, because they want to make the future they envision happen and because they want to avoid being abandoned. That’s the submissive part of them.

But if they are put in this position too often, at some point they may lose their temper because of the stress. They most likely will regret it tho because this is not the energy they want to embrace in a relationship; they want to be the passionate and loving King of Wands, instead of the angry king. But anyone would crack under that kind of stress. So yea don’t take advantage of them.

How it will affect your relationship with them Page of Wands, The Hanged Man, Page of Cups

I don’t think it will negatively affect your relationship. Honestly this person has probably just been with the wrong people, hence their past relationship(s) fed on their wound/fear and made it worse.

Both of you are probably similar in some way, or your souls are connected in some way. Both of you will have this desire to understand and explore each other and the life you can share together. You both will learn from each other, softly and in a fun way. There will be this spiritual growth and realizations that bring a positive and motivating effect on both of you to try more, to experiment more, to experience more. So you will likely return the same energy to them, which means the relationship will not be one-sided, and it will not be harmful to them.

I feel like one person here is more emotionally soft and responsive/open, and the other is a bit more excitable and fun-loving. It’s like your inner child and theirs will be able to connect with each other, each one of you will bring your own individuality and ideas into the connection but you guys will be on the same vibration– so to speak. Instead of being heavy and burdensome, the connection will become lighthearted (like teenage love) and enlightening (like a spiritual connection).

PILE 4

Their shadow side The Hermit, 2 of Cups, 7 of Swords Rx (Page of Cups)

I don’t know whether this is a funny situation or... a serious one. With 7 of Swords in reverse and Page of Cups, I’m mostly getting immaturity and inability to properly communicate what they are thinking. I’m not getting malice. It’s like a child wanting to connect and interact with the kids in the neighborhood but they start a conversation with a snide comment. Maybe your person spent time alone quite a lot growing up, maybe they lack social skills or social interactions, or maybe they are neurodivergent.

Sometimes they don’t quite know how to act in a relationship, although they very much care about their relationships. There is that edge, but also that innocence. I feel like this person tries, but they are just awkward or “off”? about it. Something about them is not 'typical' here. So when the other person does not respond positively or does not try to connect back with them (regardless how), your person will feel rejected and feel bad about themselves, they may pull away and want to be alone with their thoughts and sulk, which doesn’t really help their case (in order to learn how to be in a connection, we need people to interact with).

How it affects their romantic relationships in general Death, Knight of Wands, 10 of Swords

Eh either the relationships your person forms crash and burn the moment they make social blunders or say some shit and unintentionally be insensitive to the other person, OR the relationships they form typically go through many stages; it may typically start fine, but then they make some comments or don’t act ‘right’ in their connection and it causes an argument, and they don’t know how to solve it, or they may unintentionally make it worse, and the fight ensues. So the relationships they have had might have been intense, exhausting, back and forth, on and off. It’s like trying to make two puzzle pieces fit each other when they don’t quite fit.

Your person does not intentionally sabotage their relationship, they want things to work. It’s just that they are… bad at it? Something is off somewhere but, like, innocently instead of maliciously. I’m not sure what placement influences this exactly, but my brother is an Aries rising and his jokes can come off insulting (he doesn't mean to be insulting, his jokes just... don’t work sometimes) which usually ends up pissing me off lmaoooo so I push back hard, he gets offended, I get offended, and we don't talk for a while before we bury the hatchet. It’s like that, it starts off innocent but then something is wrong somewhere and before you know it– everything is burning.

Different levels of seriousness and intensity for different people tho; for some of you, their previous relationships might have been toxic, for others of you their relationships were just immature. If given the chance, your person would be willing to learn, which is why their relationship may go through several stages (before the relationship cannot be saved anymore and the other person or both give up).

How it will affect your relationship with them 5 of Swords, 4 of Wands Rx, Knight of Pentacles

It will be like that. What happened in their previous relationships may happen in your relationship, although I think yours will be less intense and just… pettier. It’s like bickering about toilet paper, it can be annoying but it’s not exactly serious. It’s a relationship that requires effort and adjustment. There will be disagreements, having different desires/methods, you guys may bicker with each other and when this happens it can make the relationship feel like– it’s not ideal, or it’s not what you have been fantasizing about.

But 4 of Wands are still here. It is possible for the relationship to be a happy place for both of you. Keep working on it until you both find the right place where you both can fit well together; like having all the pieces in the right slots finally. When you both go through conflicts and find resolutions in making this work (which may involve learning about each other and finding ways that can work for both of you), this experience will make your relationship stronger, more mature, and more committed. So if there’s a conflict again, as long as there is effort and commitment, you guys will find your way out of it.

#pick a card #pick a pile #tarotblr #tarot community #future spouse #love tarot reading #pac reading #free tarot readings #let me kno what u think!1 💗#sorry kinda late bcs i kinda edited it a bit lol #pac

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