#hero deserves to be happy

[hero-deserves-to-be-happy]

Under The Weather (A Hero-Centric Sick Fic)

When Hero has to cancel his visit home due to illness, Kel gets worried and calls in some reinforcements to take care of him. Kel knows there is nothing that upsets his brother more than being fussed over and worried about, but maybe he'll let himself be taken care of just this once...

Genre: Sick Fic, Slice of Life and Hurt/Comfort. Friendship and Kel & Hero's Brotherly Love. Post-Good Ending. Self-Indulgent. Hero Deserves To Be Happy.

Characters: Hero (POV Character), Kel (POV Character), and Zoey (OC). Sally and the parents make brief appearances. Mari and Sunny are mentioned.

Relationships: Hero and Kel's Brotherly Bond. Kel and Zoey (OC) Friendship. Hero and Zoey (OC) Friendship [Could be Hero/OC if you really wanted, but this story take place mid-extremely slow burn so they'd swear they're just friends here]. Past Hero/Mari is implied, referenced, and mentioned.

Word Count: 11,886

Rating: G

Warnings: Some hurt/comfort. Some mentions of grief. Mentioned flu and flu-like symptoms. Sick Character. Referenced Canonical Character Death. OMORI SPOILERS. There is a little angst, but it wraps up with brotherly love and Hero actually being happy and taken care of after the good ending (who knew we'd live to see the day...)

⛅This story is part of the "When Sun Shines Again" universe & includes specific references to "Am I Ready For Love? Or Maybe Just A Best Friend" but it should stand-alone and make sense without reading any of that. 

A/N: It's my birthday and this is my (Acacia's) self-indulgent present to myself. 😁Thank you for indulging me!

Link to work on AO3. Full text below the cut.

Thank you for reading! 🧡💙☂️

Kel glanced over at the clock, watching as the second hand barely ticked away. He generally wasn’t this distracted or antsy at basketball practice, even when his coach called an emergency practice after school on a Friday when everyone was naturally jittery with anticipation for the weekend. But he couldn’t seem to focus on anything today—found himself zoning out until something collided with the back of his head.

“Ouch!” he yelped, rubbing his hand across the spot the basketball had just bounced off of him. That was definitely going to leave a mark. Some of his teammates snickered while a few offered shrugs of apologies. His coach huffed, crossing his arms clearly unamused.

“What is going on with you today?”

“Sorry, coach,” he mumbled sheepishly—scratching the back of his neck. “My brother’s coming home from college for the weekend, so I guess I’ve been a little distracted.”

His coach frowned. “Well you can run out that distraction by running laps around this gym. 10 laps—go!”

Kel sighed, but he sprinted off for his laps. If he was being perfectly honest, he didn’t mind. If he was lucky, maybe running laps would help time pass faster. He’d try anything that would help time pass faster. Hero was coming home, and he couldn’t wait to see him.

When practice finally wrapped up, he practically sprinted out to his car and, though it likely would have worried his mother, he sped home at, at least, a solid 10 mph above the speed limit. He hoped he hadn’t missed Hero’s arrival—though he knew he had a class this morning and wouldn’t have been able to leave until later in the day, then he had what was probably a 3-hour drive taking traffic into account, so maybe time was on his side.

When he pulled onto his street, he was relieved to see that Hero’s car was not in the driveway, and as he ran through the doorway into the house, he called, “Have you heard from Hero at all?” Do you know what time he’s coming?”

With an affectionate chuckle, his mom looked up from the block structure she had been building with Sally. “Well, welcome home to you too, Kel. Did you have a good day at school? How was basketball practice?”

“It was fine,” he said with a shrug, trying to ignore that lump on the back of his head. “But have you—?”

“Wanna play ‘zoo,’ Kel?” Sally interrupted with a bright smile as she held up some of the colorful, plastic animals he and Hero had bought her for her birthday. “You can have any ammimals you want.” She stared up at him with wide, expectant eyes as she handed him an elephant. Kel smiled, patting his little sister on the head.

“Thanks, Sally. We’ll play in a minute, okay?” He paused, turning back to his mother. “Mom—”

“I haven’t heard from him since this morning. He was supposed to call before he left, but maybe he got busy or forgot,” she cut him off with a slight shake of her head. “I hope he’ll make it back in time for dinner.”

“I’ll call him,” exclaimed Kel reaching for the telephone receiver. As Kel began to dial the number he knew by heart, he stopped—wondering if it would be better to call Hero’s cell phone. They were all still adjusting to the fact that he had gotten one. It made their mother feel safer and more secure, knowing that Hero had a way to call for help in an emergency, but since he had limited, prepaid minutes, they all still usually communicated with him by calling the landline at the fraternity house where he lived. In this case, however, Kel was hoping that Hero was already on his way, in which case, his cell phone would be the best way to get ahold of him.

“What if he’s driving?” sighed Mom as Kel began to flip through the address book they kept near the phone. When he found the number, Kel shrugged.  

“Then he won’t answer, and I’ll just leave a message.”

“Tell him about my zoo,” giggled Sally, and Kel nodded. As he held the phone to his ear, the ringing of the telephone mingled with Sally’s best impression of a lion. A smile tugged at his mouth as he watched as his sister began to set her animal toys in the block zoo she had been building with their mother.

He was so distracted he almost didn’t hear the slow, heavy breath followed by a hoarse, groggy, “Hello?”

Kel’s brow furrowed. “Hero? Uh…it’s Kel…” He stumbled over his words, worried he had dialed the wrong number. The person on the other line barely sounded like his brother at all. There was more wheezy breathing as if Hero couldn’t catch his breath, followed by an audible gasp and a stumbling, almost panicky, “Kel? Oh my gosh—what time is it?”

“Um…around 6:00, I think.”

“I’m so sorry,” apologized Hero, sounding like himself again besides the hoarse breathiness of his voice. “I wasn’t feeling well so I lied down to take a nap before I left, and I must have completely lost track of time.” His voice cracked and hitched—raspy and wheezy before he finally burst into a fit of nasty, phlegmy coughing.

“You sound terrible. Are you sick?”

“He’s sick?” interjected their mother bustling around him in a fidgety panic. “What’s wrong? Did he see a doctor? Does he have a fever?”

“I don’t know, Mom,” huffed Kel, but he was promptly cut off by Hero.

“Mom’s there?” There was something concerned and guilty in his already weary voice. “Tell her not to worry. I’m fine. My friends have been passing this bug around. I’m the last one to catch it. I’ll probably be better in a couple days.”

Kel nodded before he realized his brother couldn’t see him; then, he turned to his mom giving her a reassuring pat on the shoulder. “He says all his friends have had this bug. It only lasts a day or two. He’s gonna be fine.”

“Tell him to take medicine, get lots of rest, and drink plenty of water and to keep checking his temperature,” his mother began rambling. “If it reaches 103, he needs to call a doctor or go to urgent care.”

“Mom,” sighed Kel. “Hero’s gonna be a doctor. I’m sure he knows all that.”

“You can hand the phone off to Mom If you want. I’ll talk to her,” Hero weakly interjected before he started coughing again. “I’m really sorry I’ll have to postpone my visit, but I’m not well enough to drive and I wouldn’t want to get you sick.”

“It’s fine, okay? Don’t worry about it. Are you sure you’re alright? That’s a really nasty cough.” Kel bit his lip, trying not to sound nearly as concerned as he felt. His fingers trembled as they gripped onto the receiver. As he looked in his mother’s face, he knew she was worried too and likely for the same reason: Hero never got sick.

“I’m fine,” he insisted but his raspy voice and coughing fit seemed to imply otherwise. “Don’t worry about me. I’m probably just going to make some instant ramen and go to bed.”

“But you hate instant ramen…”

“He’s making instant ramen,” interjected their mother. “Tell him to try to eat something healthier—more hearty like soup.”

“Mom—” Kel began to protest before Hero cut him off with a weary sigh.

“I just didn’t have the energy to make anything else…” Hero’s voice trailed, and Kel swallowed hard.

“Is there someone there who can take care of you?” he asked, and Hero sighed again.

“I don’t want to bother anyone or get them sick. Besides they’re all heading out to this party tonight.” He paused, coughing again. “But it’s fine. I’m really okay, Kel, just a little under the weather.”

Kel sighed heavily. He wished he could believe him, but Hero had always had this way of deflecting and belittling his own problems because he didn’t want people to worry. This had gotten especially bad over the past couple of years. Ever since their fight, it seemed like Hero would never tell him that anything was wrong ever again. Kel’s chest ached. His brother could be dying right now, and he’d have no idea.

“Hero—” He stopped abruptly, unsure of what he even wanted to say. It would probably just be the wrong thing anyway, so it might be better if he just didn’t say anything at all.

“I’m okay, Kel,” Hero gently insisted again. “And I’m sorry…but we’ll see each other another time. Maybe next weekend or the weekend after? Whenever I’m not contagious anymore.”

Kel sighed, but he finally answered, “Yeah…You just take care, okay? Do you want me to put Mom on now?”

Hero hummed, and Kel handed the phone off to their mother who started blustering and prattling away about cold medicine, sponge baths, and electrolytes. Kel didn’t catch most of it, but he did clearly hear, “I wish you had someone up there to take care of you.” Kel let out a long, heavy sigh. He certainly felt the same way, but that definitely wasn’t going to happen. Hero hated asking for help more than he hated instant ramen.

“Is Hero gonna be, okay?” asked Sally, tugging on his arm. Kel gave her a reassuring smile.

“Yeah. He’s just a little sick right now, but he’ll be fine. Then he’ll come visit and see your zoo.” He took Sally’s hand and led her back to the blocks and toys. “Here, I’ll help you with it.”

Helping Sally with her zoo project did not distract Kel nearly as much as he hoped. He was constantly distracted by worries about Hero and how bad his health was—if he was really telling them the whole story. He didn’t usually get sick after all, and he sounded horrible. What if he had a flu or something and needed medical attention? He could at least use someone who could check in on him and make sure he was getting water and enough to eat that wasn’t instant ramen. But Kel wasn’t sure who that would even be. Unless…

Impulsively, Kel raced upstairs to his room to grab the notecard where he had written Hero’s friend Zoey’s phone number after she had offered to let him call her whenever he got stuck on his math homework. Kel had used to call Hero with all his homework trouble, but after Hero himself was stumped by a particularly difficult math problem, his brother had suggested they ask his friend who was an engineering major and, Hero insisted, a math genius. Best of all, she had just so happened to be hanging out with him when Kel had called. Zoey had quickly solved and walked him through the problem, then several others. Then she generously offered that he could call her with any other questions—which he had multiple times. Honestly, he’d probably be failing math right now if it wasn’t for her.

He talked to her all the time, sometimes it seemed, even more than Hero, though Kel often thought he probably got a more accurate account of how Hero was actually doing from her than if he had just asked his brother himself. He could only be told ‘I’m fine, just busy’ so many times before it started sounding automatic and rehearsed. Zoey at least told him the truth: he’s stressed about upcoming exams, busy cooking food for a party his fraternity was hosting, or groggy from staying up all night studying. Kel sighed. He understood if his brother wanted to keep a lot of his life private, but, he’d be lying if he said it didn’t hurt a little to be cut off from his reality by dismissive ‘I’m fine’s. He knew Hero didn’t want him to worry and was likely just trying to protect him from that, but still…he couldn’t shake the feeling that it was his own fault. Hero probably didn’t want to tell him he was stressed out, overwhelmed, or sick because he was worried Kel would just say the wrong thing, just like he had when Hero had gotten so depressed after Mari had died.

Neither of them ever wanted that to happen again so they just didn’t really say much of anything anymore—at least not much of anything that mattered. Sure, they still talked—so much and so often that Kel knew the phone number to Hero’s fraternity house by heart, but it barely scratched the surface, never touched anything deep or meaningful. In a way, it felt hollow, distant—like Hero was only showing him a hazy impression of his life, enough to reassure Kel he was doing okay but not enough that he could feel like he actually knew him anymore, at least not like he had when they were younger and Hero had told him everything. It was getting better—had been over the past two years since they had learned the truth, but…Kel knew things would never go back to the way they were. He should probably be used to that by now. His brother was a very private person, and he probably always would be.

And by the time Kel had dialed the number and listened to two rings of the telephone, he realized with a somewhat sheepish sigh that he probably should have been a little more respectful of that. His hands began to tremble as he clutched onto the receiver—genuinely starting to worry he was crossing a line. Zoey was one of Hero’s best friends, and Hero might be embarrassed to know his younger brother had been calling her to ask if she’d check up on him.

Before he could even begin to consider hanging up, however, someone answered the phone with a “Hello?”

“Hey, uh, this is Kel. Is Zoey there?”

The young woman on the other line laughed. “Scotty, how are you?”  she asked, and Kel’s mouth curved into a bright smile. He knew immediately it was her. She was the only person in the world who called him ‘Scotty.’ Zoey had explained to him once it had to do with his talent for fixing things, just like “Scotty the Miracle Man,” a reference to some old tv show Zoey said she had used to watch with her dad. It didn’t bother Kel that he didn’t get the reference. He was honestly just kind of excited to have a nickname. After all, he had never really had one besides ‘Kel’ before and that was just a shortened version of his name. He had always kind of wanted one, just like Hero, but he had never told anyone that before.

“I’m good,” he replied with a chuckle. “You?”

Zoey hummed. “I’m doing okay—been kind of busy. You stuck on your math homework again?”

“Well yeah,” Kel admitted with a shrug. “But that wasn’t why I was calling. Is this a bad time?”

“Nope. Most of my sorority sisters are headed out to this party, so that’s probably what you’re hearing in the background.”

Kel’s brow furrowed. He heard some background chatter and rustling noises, but it was all kind of faint—nothing he would have thought was worth mentioning if Zoey hadn’t brought it up herself. “You’re not going to the party?”

“I have a project due next week, and honestly, parties aren’t really my scene. Don’t tell your brother, but I really don’t think I’d have a good time without him there anyway. We’re usually the only sober ones, and drunk company’s really not all it’s cracked up to be,” she replied dryly, and Kel laughed but shrugged his shoulders.

“Have you talked to Hero at all?”

“Not since yesterday. Did he make it home okay?”

Kel sighed. “He’s not coming. He’s sick.” Kel paused—sighing again and trying not to sound too disappointed. “He called like 45 minutes ago—has this terrible cough. He says he caught some bug or something and isn’t well enough to drive.”

“I knew this would happen,” huffed Zoey though she sounded more guilty than upset. “We’ve all been passing this flu around, and Hero’s been trying to take care of everyone so, of course, he got sick himself.”

“A flu?” interrupted Kel. He shook his head. So Hero had been underexaggerating again…? He should’ve known.

“I’m sure he’s going to be okay,” Zoey reassured him. “He has a really strong immune system—barely ever gets sick. It’s one of the reasons he’s going to be a great doctor. Don’t worry. I had this flu too—got over it in a couple days.”

“He got it from you?” teased Kel, and Zoey laughed.

“Probably from Kyle. They are roommates. But we’ve all had it. Hero’s the last one.” Zoey paused, sighed. “We really didn’t think he was going to get sick.”

“Yeah he uh…usually doesn’t, but he sounded pretty miserable when I talked to him earlier today. Said the only thing he could eat was instant ramen.”

“He hates instant ramen,” Zoey interjected, and Kel shook his head with a sigh.

“I know.” He paused thoughtfully then tried to ask as nonchalantly as he could manage, “Hey…uh…do you think you could bring him over some food or something? Just so he wouldn’t have to keep eating instant ramen. I wouldn’t want you to get sick or anything, but since you already had it, maybe you could just drop it off and maybe check in to make sure he’s doing okay…?” His voice trailed, and he bit his lip as he waited for her answer.

“I’m not much of a cook, Scotty,” chuckled Zoey. “But I could stop by a restaurant or Other Mart to pick up a couple things and drop them off for him. You know it’s only going to make him feel guilty though. He’ll help anybody that needs him without batting an eye, but the minute you try to turn it around and return the favor, it’s suddenly a big deal.”

Shaking his head slightly, Kel sighed. “Yeah…that’s just Hero for you.”

When Zoey sighed herself, Kel imagined she was shaking her head with the same somewhat affectionate exasperation, but she hummed thoughtfully. “I’m sure he’s feeling pretty miserable right now, and not just because he’s sick. He’s been so excited to see you—talked about practically nothing else for the past couple weeks.”

“Really?” The question slipped out before Kel could stop it, and his face flushed. Luckily, she couldn’t see him.

“Yeah, of course,” Zoey chuckled like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “I don’t know if I’ve ever known anyone who’s so excited to see his brother. I mean, I love my brother, but the way Hero talks about you—it’s like you’re the most important person in the whole world, his best friend.”

“I don’t think I’m his best friend anymore,” mumbled Kel without thinking.

“Hey…” Zoey’s tone of voice softened—something gentle and sympathetic in it. “If you’re talking about me or Kyle or Brandi, C.J., Lorraine, Tamra…yeah, we’re all Hero’s friends and we all care about him, but none of us are you. And we’re never going to be you, Scotty. You’ll always be number one.”

“I dunno,” sighed Kel. He was pretty sure he lost that spot when he was insensitive, said all the wrong things after Mari died—when he hurt his brother, broke him.

“I don’t really know if it’s my place to say but…” Zoey began tentatively, but she let out a conceding sigh. “You know the only time I ever really see Hero happy is when he talks about you—about how amazing you are and how proud he is. His face just lights up, and he smiles for real—it actually reaches his eyes.”

Kel’s face grew warm, but he stifled a chuckle. It was funny to hear her say that considering he would have said the exact same thing about her. They all would have. It was Sunny who had noticed it first, actually, on account of the fact he lived in the city and Hero often invited him to hang out with him and his friends. Kel would never forget how he had excitedly told him, Aubrey, and Basil all about what it had been like to see Hero smile again. They almost hadn’t believed him, but then Hero had come home on a break and told him about how he got caught in the rain with some friend of his, a spunky engineering major who thankfully had a red umbrella. In the middle of his story, Hero’s face had lit up and he had smiled just like Sunny had said, a real smile that actually reached his eyes. Kel’s chest ached just thinking about it—about how much he wished his brother would smile like that all time, about how much he wished he would be happy again.

Kel took a long, deep breath. Could it really be possible that Hero smiled like that when he talked about him too? He couldn’t really believe that. Not after everything that had happened.

“He really loves you, you know?” Zoey continued quietly, and Kel fidgeted. Could she read his mind or something? “If the situation was reversed and you were sick and he was hours away, he’d be calling your friends too—having Aubrey and Basil go check up on you and make sure you’re doing okay. He’d probably be calling your parents all the time for updates too. Everyone in Faraway Town would be keeping an eye on you for him.”

Something twisted in Kel’s chest, and his eyes fluttered closed as he took a deep breath. “Please don’t tell him I’m worried.” His voice hitched over his words—quiet, small, like he was that little boy cowering in the corner watching Hero break again.

“You can tell him yourself,” Zoey gently encouraged. “I’m sure he—”

“You know about our fight, right?” Kel interrupted without thinking. He swallowed hard—the only sound during the long, heavy pause which followed. It probably crossed a line to ask that. He didn’t even know if she knew, but Hero had told him he had told Zoey about Mari, had told her a lot of things that he didn’t think he’d ever tell anyone. It wouldn’t have surprised Kel if their fight was one of them.

“Yes,” Zoey finally admitted—quiet, matter-of-fact. “He told me.”

Kel huffed lightly, breathily almost a disbelieving laugh. “Then you know why I can’t just call him up and tell him I’m—” His voice hitched, and he stopped abruptly.  

“Kel—” she began to protest, but he cut her off.

“And you also know that it’s all my fault that we’re not—” He stopped abruptly—the words getting caught in the back of his throat. He shut his eyes tightly and swallowed hard.

“That’s not the story he told me.”

Something twisted in Kel’s chest. He couldn’t imagine what else his brother could have possibly said. Even if Hero had tried his best to protect him with his account and paint him in a better light so Zoey wouldn’t hate him, he couldn’t change the fact that it was his pushy and insensitive words that had broken him, right? He was the one who had made him feel guilty, made him feel like it was his fault he was so depressed, like he could just snap out of it somehow, like he wasn’t doing enough, and worst of all, like he was disrespecting Mari. He was the one who had said all the wrong things, who hadn’t been sensitive or kind enough like Hero himself would have been if the situation had been reversed. He was the one who said this wasn’t what Mari would have wanted, and he was the one who watched while those words broke his brother. He was the one who had broken him.

No version of the story Hero could have possibly told anyone could have changed that, but he supposed it was really none of his business.

“You know, Kel,” Zoey continued with a heavy sigh. “Sometimes we put up walls between ourselves and the people we love because we’re afraid of hurting them. It doesn’t mean we don’t love them—it just means we don’t know how.”

Kel’s chest ached, but he swallowed hard. “And you’re saying Hero’s like that?” He paused, and the words slipped out before he could stop them. “With you?”

“With everyone.” She hadn’t missed a beat. Kel supposed he admired that about her. She could be so honest but so kind too, and she knew Hero so well. Kel could tell that she cared about him and was a good friend. Both she and Hero vehemently insisted they were nothing more than that, and Kel believed them—which is why his question probably crossed a line, why Zoey felt compelled to add, “Not just me. You know that we’re not—”

“Yeah, sorry,” stumbled Kel interrupting as he shifted and fumbled around with the phone in his hands. “I didn’t mean anything by that. I just—”

“It’s okay,” she thankfully cut him off. “Just wanted to make sure you weren’t getting the wrong idea. We get teased enough as it is by our friends—I can tell it bothers him. He won’t say, but I know it’s a touchy subject…”

“Do you think he’ll ever…uh…you know…?” he stumbled over the question, feeling guilty for even asking though he was desperate to hear another opinion that wasn’t the dismal ones he, Aubrey, Basil, and Sunny could generally come up with. Given the way he had tripped over his words, he wasn’t sure she’d even understand what he was trying to say, but she sighed.

“Honestly…I don’t know.” She paused thoughtfully. “But I do know that he’s not ready right now.”

Kel’s brow furrowed. That wasn’t exactly the answer he was expecting. “He told you that?” he asked before he could stop himself.

There was a long pause before Zoey answered, “Yes.” Her voice was matter-of-fact, pragmatic, and unreadable, but she sighed heavily. “Scotty, if you want to talk to Hero I feel like you should. He’s your brother. You should be hearing all this stuff from him—not me. It’s really none of my business.”

“He won’t talk to me.” Kel’s face flushed. He hadn’t meant to say that out loud. Zoey sighed.

“Kel…”

“It’s fine. It’s just…the way it is, you know?” he shrugged, swallowing hard. “He wouldn’t even tell me how sick he was.”

“He didn’t want you to worry.”

Kel huffed. “Well, I did anyway.”

“I’ll go check on him, okay?” Her voice softened—kind and sympathetic, almost reassuring. “But he’s going to be fine. Don’t worry. Then, I’ll call you later and tell you all about how he’s feeling better already.” She paused chuckling. “Okay?”

Kel sighed, but he shrugged his shoulders conceding, “Okay.”

“Good. Now what’s that math problem you’re stuck on?”

Kel snorted a laugh in spite of himself. “You think we have time for that?”

“Unless you want me to tell your brother you called specifically to ask me to check up on him, then yeah—I’m gonna have to actually help you with your homework,” she quipped dryly. “I think there’s a special place in hell for the kind of person who’d lie to Hero.”

Reaching for his math textbook, Kel laughed. “Alright…Well in that case, it’s another one of those functions…”

*-*-*

Wearily rubbing his eyes, Hero groaned. He was so exhausted it took all of his strength just to roll over onto his side so he could reach his bottle of water. He knew it was important for him to stay hydrated, even without his mother reminding him, and was truthfully desperate for something to drink given how hoarse and sore his throat was after he had just woken up.

Coughing, he managed to take a few sips before he sunk back down into his bed. Sunny had once rated it a 9 out of 10, but now Hero would probably rate it an 11, the most comfortable bed on earth. He never wanted to leave it ever, ever again—but that was probably just the flu talking.

Hero couldn’t remember the last time he had had the flu. He rarely ever got sick. Contracting what he had originally thought was a cold was a surprise enough, but he had just chalked it up to being a little under the weather and tried to push through it—until he had crashed that afternoon after a coughing fit—chilled, aching, and too tired to even move. By the time he woke up to answer Kel’s call, he was honestly miserable—phlegmy, wheezy, shivering, and so feverish he could barely put a sentence together. Even now, his head throbbed, and his thoughts were cloudy and muddled. He felt disoriented and too exhausted to even think too hard.

Hero sighed. He should probably take his temperature again—make sure it wasn’t too dangerously high. It barely took any time at all for the thermometer to ding—flashing a whopping 102.2 degrees Fahrenheit. Hero took a long, deep breath, or at least as deep as he could manage given his nasty cough. A fever that high certainly explained why he felt so crummy. He reached for some tissues and blew his nose before he coughed again. It would probably be best if he just went back to sleep.

His eyelids grew heavier and heavier until they finally started drooping closed, but Hero was distracted by rustling noises he heard downstairs. His brow furrowed. He thought his entire fraternity was out at a party. Had someone come back early?

The sound of footsteps walking up the stairs echoed through the hallway, followed by a knock on the door to his room.

“Uh…Come in…?” Hero mumbled unsurely in a hoarse voice before he coughed again. He tilted his head at the door as it swung open, and Zoey walked in with two bags—one paper, one plastic.

“You look terrible,” she teased dryly, but her freckled nose wrinkled as she smiled at him brightly enough that it reached her green eyes.

“Zoey?” Hero stumbled slowly, breathily. He rubbed his head—unsure if he was seeing things. “What are you doing here?”

“I heard you were sick so I brought you some soup and a Hero sandwich but I put that in the refrigerator since I thought you probably weren’t up for solid food yet.” She reached into the paper bag and took out a plastic spoon and a to-go container of soup from his favorite soup and sandwich place in the city.

“Thank you…” Hero’s voice trailed as he struggled to catch his breath.

“It was nothing, especially compared to the homemade soup you made me when I was sick.” With a thoughtful hum, she ran her hand through her short, red hair and began fumbling around in the plastic bag. “I’ve also got you some sports drinks, water, cough drops, tissues, tea, and VapoRub.”

 “You really didn’t have to do that…” Hero insisted in a raspy whisper. “How much do I owe you?”

Zoey waved her hand dismissively. “Don’t worry about it. It’s my co-op semester so I’m basically rolling in money.” She chuckled lightly. “Plus, I wanted to do this for you. What are friends for, right? And I mean, I’m the reason you got sick.”

Hero shook his head weakly as he took a long breath. “No, you’re not.”

“Right. Sorry. It was all of us,” Zoey corrected with a lopsided twitch of her mouth. “And your lack of boundaries.”

Hero chuckled lightly in spite of himself, but it quickly turned into coughing. As Zoey scrambled to get him some water, he managed to choke out, “Sorry…”

Zoey tilted her head handing him the water to drink. “For what?”

Hero shrugged, but he took a few sips. “I don’t want to get you sick.”

“I’ve already had it. I’ll be fine.” She sighed with a pointed tilt of her head. “You take this ‘hero’ stuff way too seriously, you know? It’s not gonna kill you to let someone take care of you every once and awhile.” She pushed his desk chair next to his bedside and took a seat. “Now you just sit back, relax, and take easy, okay? Mama’s here.”

“I thought I was ‘Mama’,” he teased—dry and breathy. He wouldn’t have had the energy to argue with Zoey on the best day but especially not when he was so rundown and miserably ill like this, so instead he chose to banter. Mama was the nickname his roommate and Zoey’s long-time best friend Kyle had given him back in their freshman year, after all, so it seemed appropriate.

A smile tugged at Hero’s chapped lips as he watched Zoey laugh. Something warm spread through his aching chest knowing he had made her smile.

“Hey, I was ‘Mama’ before you were,” she bantered back. “But don’t worry I won’t tell Kyle.” She twisted her mouth to the side, but her expression softened as she reached out to take his hand. Frowning, she shook her head. “Your hands are so clammy.”

“Sorry…” mumbled Hero as she pushed some sweaty hair out of his face—pressing her palm to his forehead.

“You’re burning up. You have a thermometer?”

Hero nodded—then weaky motioned to his bedside table where his thermometer was sitting amongst a bunch of tissues. “I just took it. It’s 102.2.”

Zoey’s brow furrowed. “When do we call a doctor?”

Hero shrugged. “Probably if it’s over 103…” His breathy voice trailed wearily. “But there’s things you can try to bring it down before then.”

“Like a cold sponge bath like in a movie?” asked Zoey, her mouth quirking to the side. Hero shook his head.

“You want it lukewarm—not cold. If it’s cold, the blood vessels will constrict, and the body will hold onto heat…” He sighed then coughed into his elbow. After he managed to catch his breath, he added, “But tepid water is good. You can take a wet rag and use it to sponge the back of the neck or the forehead—the arms and torso would help too.”

“You want me to go get one?”

Hero’s face flushed, finally realizing what he had said and that it had come out in a way he hadn’t intended. “No, uh… I meant ‘you’ in the impersonal sense. I couldn’t ask you to do that.”

Her mouth curved into a slight smile. “I’m happy to help.”

“I know,” he said, but he fidgeted, something almost bashful in his expression. “But I uh…I wouldn’t want you to have to see me…uh…”—his voice cracked and he mumbled—“shirtless.”

Zoey chuckled. “You’re adorable, you know that?” she teased. “It’s nothing I haven’t seen before. We’ve been to the beach how many times and you’re a lifeguard for goodness sakes. You can’t possibly be that self-conscious.”

“That’s different. That was the beach or the pool—this is…” He could feel his ears burning. “my room. We’re alone here, and—”

“And you’re sick. It’s all medical. Surely, I don’t need to explain that to you, future doctor.” She crossed her arms with a pointed look, before she clicked her tongue and bantered, “Yes, we all know you’re very attractive, Mr. Prince, but you kind of look like death warmed over right now. It’s nothing to get worked up over.”

Hero choked, then coughed repeatedly—phlegmy and guttural, definitely not attractive in the slightest. As he hacked and lurched forward, Zoey patted him on the back, firm but gentle before she rubbed her hand across his shoulders.

“Woah. Woah. Take it easy. I was just teasing you.” Her voice was soft and kind, and there was something so gentle in her eyes as she met his and apologized. “Sorry.”

Hero’s insides twisted. He could tell he had worried her, and he couldn’t stand it. He never wanted anyone to worry about him—especially not his friends.

“No. It’s okay,” he insisted when he finally caught his breath, but his words got jumbled and muddled in his foggy brain and scratchy throat. “I…I know you were... It’s just…that’s not what I meant. I was just…embarrassed. I mean you’ve already had to see me in my pajamas.” Hero stared down at his pajama shirt and pulled on the collar as his face burned and not just from the fever.

“Your grandpa pajamas?” Zoey teased dryly. His face flushed, but he nodded. Chuckling lightly, Zoey shook her head. “You do realize I’ve seen Kyle in his underwear more times than I’d care to admit, right? This is nothing. And besides, I’ve already seen them before.”

“You’ve”—Hero’s voice cracked—“seen my pajamas?”

“Well not in person, but Sunny drew me a picture of you in them.”

“Sunny drew you a picture of me in my pajamas?” Hero repeated incredulously in a disbelieving, hoarse voice.

Zoey shrugged but answered matter-of-factly. “He only draws you in your pajamas. He draws everybody in pajamas. You know, the last time I saw him he asked me about my pajamas so he could draw me in pajamas too.”

“Why—?” Hero’s voice hitched—cut off by an awkward laugh and wheezy coughing. “Why would he do that?”

“No idea. You tell me.” She paused, but Hero could only shrug his shoulders. Sunny was a talented artist, but Hero would be lying if he said he understood a lot of his abstract pieces or the reasoning behind them. Zoey’s guess as to why Sunny wanted to draw everyone in pajamas was as good as his, he supposed. “But I’m pretty sure he always draws you in these exact pajamas—long sleeves, button down shirt, stripes. I remember thinking ‘why does Sunny think Hero wears grandpa pajamas?’ but clearly it’s because you do.”

Hero chuckled lightly but tilted his head at her. “What’s wrong with my pajamas?”

“Nothing—if you’re over the age of 70,” bantered Zoey. “If you’re not, I don’t think anyone’s worn pajamas like these since the 1950s, but I guess you were always a Wally Cleaver type, huh?”

As his face burned, Hero sighed. “I don’t think I’m as charming as Wally Cleaver, and I’m definitely not as athletic as him. And he had all those girlfriends…”

“That’s a moot point,” Zoey interrupted, waving her hand at him. “Wally wanted all those girlfriends—you don’t. If you did, you absolutely could have them.”

“I’m sure that’s not—” Hero began as his blush deepened, but Zoey cut him off again.

“No, it is. Every girl in my sorority house would date you in a heartbeat,” she replied bluntly—pragmatic as if it was a well-known fact, but her mouth curved into a lopsided grin as she dryly teased. “You are Mr. Prince, after all.”

“Tamra has a boyfriend…” Hero protested—weak but somewhat playful.  

Zoey sighed, rolling her eyes. “Well okay…not Tamra then...”

“Or you,” he quietly added, but Zoey’s mouth twitched into a lopsided smile.

“I don’t know, Mr. Prince. If you were actually interested in me, I think I’d have to seriously consider it—especially now that I’ve seen you in your grandpa pajamas.” She beamed at him with a bright, teasing grin before she let out a short, playful whistle.

Hero blushed before he buried his burning face in his hands. “Zoey…”

Before either of them could say anything more, however, they were interrupted by a distant, shrill whistling sound.

“That’s the kettle,” said Zoey. “I’ll be right back with some tea for you.”

“You really don’t have to—” Hero began to weakly protest, but she cut him off with a pointed stare.

“I don’t want to hear it, Henry.”

Hero paused. It still caught him off guard every time she used his real name. It wasn’t too often that she did—only when she wanted to tell him to stop being a ‘hero.’ It was her way of reminding him to take care of himself, reminding him that it was okay if he was just ‘Henry’ for a while. If Hero was being honest, it meant a lot to him to know someone cared enough to tell him that. Zoey had been telling him that for years now, but she only started calling him ‘Henry’ to do it after he had told her about Mari.

To this day he wasn’t sure why exactly he had told her in the first place besides the fact she had sort of figured it out on her own, but he was grateful that he had told her the truth, had finally been able to share that with someone. He would never forget the way she had cried for him—held him, told him that she wished he and Mari had gotten their forever. He had been so stunned, so moved by her empathy and kindness, that he had just panicked—trying to apologize for making her sad, for making her cry. After a lot of back and forth of him apologizing profusely and her gentle reassurances that it was okay, she had finally just cut him off in that spunky little way of hers. “No. None of that, Henry,” she had said with a pointed emphasis on his real name, trying her best not to smile as she said it for possibly the first time. Even so, she had insisted, “I’m serious. I’m going to keep calling you that until you stop that. Stop being a ‘Hero’—stop worrying about everybody else for just a second. It won’t kill you to be a little selfish for once…and it’ll honestly make the rest of us look better.”

Hero chuckled lightly to himself just thinking about it. She certainly kept her word—pulled his real name out for that reason whenever she felt he needed reminding of that. There was always a certain warmth and a flutter in his chest whenever he heard her say it.

A smile tugged at his mouth as he stifled a laugh, and the way her lips twitched in the corners made him realize she was trying not to laugh now too. Could it be that even after all this time, it still felt a little unnatural, a little awkward for her to call him that? After all, she generally called him ‘Hero’ or if she was feeling playful or cheeky ‘Mr. Prince.’

Hero’s chuckling was soon drowned out by coughing again, and Zoey patted his back and handed him tissues, water, and a cough drop until he finally calmed again.

“Still think you don’t need me?” she quipped, quirking an eyebrow at him.

“I’m glad you’re here,” he admitted quietly.

Her smile widened before she gave him one final pat on the back then took off down the stairs. “I’ll be right back with the tea.”

Hero took a long, shaky breath, trying his best to stay awake as he waited for her to return. His mind was feeling hazy again—sluggish and foggy from fever and exhaustion, but a question nagged at him. How had Zoey known he was sick? Yes, she was very perceptive, and there had certainly been times he was almost convinced she had to be a mind reader but…he hadn’t been that ill when he talked to her last. He supposed Kyle could have said something, but as far as Hero knew, Kyle had just assumed he was napping not battling with a flu.

“Here’s your tea,” said Zoey, swiftly reappearing with a warm mug, a gift from his fraternity brothers that read ‘World’s Best Mama.’ Hero laughed every time he saw it, though this time it came out more like a breathy wheeze then a cough. “It’s lemon and echinacea since you’re sick. I put a little honey in it for you too.”

Hero smiled as she handed him the cup. He probably shouldn’t have been surprised. Zoey was one of his best friends. She probably knew more about him than anyone else—of course, that would extend to knowing how he took his tea. But it wouldn’t extend to knowing he was sick, would it?

“Thank you,” he mumbled, taking a sip of his cup of tea before he took a long, shaky breath. “Hey…Zoey?”

“Yeah?”

“How did you know I was sick?” Hero swallowed hard—then coughed again. Zoey tilted her head pointedly at him.

“It’s kind of obvious,” she quipped—deflecting. Hero sighed. He knew a lot about that himself.

“Yeah…but did someone tell you? Ask you to check up on me?”

Zoey sighed heavily, but she finally admitted. “Yes. Scotty mentioned it when he called me earlier. He said you were too sick to drive home this weekend so you had to cancel your trip.”

Hero blinked at her. It took a minute for the words she had said to register. Scotty was her nickname for Kel, some reference he had never quite gotten himself, but it seemed to make his brother happy to have a nickname. Hero’s head ached. His brother…? “Kel?” he asked in a weary confusion. “Kel called you?”

Zoey nodded. “I helped him with his math homework.”

Hero swallowed hard. Somehow he knew that wasn’t the entire truth. The thought made something twist in his chest. He bit his lip as he quietly asked, “Is he worried about me?”

“What do you think?” Zoey paused, but from the look she was giving him now, Hero knew the answer, if he hadn’t already. “You two are a lot alike you know—you both worry about each other but won’t really say.”

“I don’t want Kel to worry...” The words slipped out without him really thinking about them—honest, vulnerable, real. The feverish haze was loosening his tongue, it seemed. Hero’s brow furrowed. He didn’t like it for the same reasons he didn’t like drinking. It felt like losing control—only this time, he didn’t have the energy to care too much.  

“Then I don’t think not telling him anything is the answer,” Zoey replied. “Kel’s pretty smart, you know? He knows something’s wrong even when you won’t say—knew you were way sicker than you let on. He asked if I could stop by and check on you.”

Hero’s face flushed. He couldn’t really process what she was saying, “Kel did that?”

“Why do you sound so surprised?”

Hero swallowed hard. He met her eyes—hoping the look in them would say louder than any words that she already knew why. Ever since their fight, he had felt Kel slipping away—walking on eggshells around him like he was scared he was fragile and would snap again. No matter what he did to try to reassure Kel that he was okay and that he would never lash out at him like that ever again, Hero couldn’t shake the feeling that he was losing his brother. He tried his best to stay connected—talking to him all the time, planning trips home to visit him, even letting him stay with him in the city, and even though things had been getting better since they had learned the truth two years ago, Hero knew that they would never be the same. They could never be the same, not anymore. Not after…

“I really hurt him…” Hero’s voice cracked—breathy, dazed, but heart-wrenchingly guilty even all these years later.

He hadn’t realized he had said that aloud, until Zoey gently reassured him, “And you apologized and moved on. That’s all, in the past now. I don’t think Kel holds it against you at all.” She paused, sighed. “What if he’s sitting around, saying the same thing—worrying the same thing…?”

Hero’s chest ached, but he shook his head. “No, I…”

“Hero,” Zoey sighed, cutting him off. “If there’s distance between you and Kel, it’s only because the two of you won’t just talk to each other. If you did, maybe you’d realize you’re both scared of the exact same thing, and that it’s not worth being worried about. You had one fight. It doesn’t mean your relationship is just broken forever.”   

“It was a really big fight,” Hero gently protested, swallowing hard before he tried to catch his breath. “There are some things you just can’t come back from.”

“And I can promise you, this is not one of them.” She reached out and took his hand again, holding it tightly until he looked up at her and her reassuring green eyes. “You should hear the way Kel talks about you. It’s constant—all the time, no matter what we’re talking about. We’ll be working on polynomial functions and suddenly he’ll just start going on and on about how you always got all As on your report card or how you jumped into a lake to save Sunny and Basil or how you won some hot dog eating contest. He polishes all your trophies while you’re away at school. He’d be the first to tell you that you are the kindest, most amazing person he’s ever known, and he wants to be just like you. You’re his hero—no pun intended. And nothing you could possibly say could change that—could change how much he looks up to you.”

Hero’s face flushed red—he could feel the tips of his ears burning as he turned away from her staring down at his duvet. “He…he said all that?”

“He didn’t have to. Scotty wears his heart on his sleeve. It’s obvious, and honestly you only have to talk to him for five minutes to know how important you are to him. It honestly makes me wonder a little about what Jared and Lorraine say about me—probably nothing nice,” she chuckled teasingly with an affectionate roll of her eyes. “I can almost guarantee you; most people are not talking about their siblings like they’re actual saints behind their backs.”

Hero chuckled lightly, but his expression softened—something warm spreading through his chest as he thought about Kel. Could that really be true?

He sighed, pushing the thought away—grateful for the opportunity Zoey had given him to change the subject to her own family. Hero knew that wasn’t her intention, but he was taking the opportunity anyway. No matter how easy Zoey was to talk to and how many private and difficult things he had told her about himself, he still didn’t like to be the center of conversation and would never enjoy talking about himself. Zoey didn’t enjoy that either, so he wouldn’t want to put her on the spot, but this was about her siblings, right?

Hero didn’t know Zoey’s younger brother Jared very well, but he didn’t really seem like the type to have many nice things to say about anyone, but her twin sister, Lorraine, was also a good friend of his. They often knitted or did arts and crafts together during which time Lorraine tended to gush about her sister in a way Hero found very sweet and endearing. He hoped Lorraine wouldn’t mind if he told her that.  

“Lorraine has nothing but nice things to say about you,” he admitted with a slight smile. “She’s always telling me how smart, driven, and beautiful you are. How you’re strong and honest but so kind, so much softer than you want people to know. She says you’d make a great girlfriend.” Hero blushed. That last part had just slipped out—he probably wouldn’t have said it, if he wasn’t so feverish, but Zoey just laughed.

“Lorraine said that to you?” She sighed, rolling her eyes somewhat affectionately but the look in them was genuinely guilty. “Sorry. I’ll talk to her.”

As he coughed, Hero shook his head. “No, it’s…it’s okay. She’s right…” His voice trailed, distant and breathy, but he couldn’t stop the words that tumbled out of his mouth, “You are all of those things, and if you did ever want to date someone, that person would be very lucky…”

“Not nearly as lucky as the person who gets your heart, Mr. Prince.”

Even though Hero was sure she was only teasing him, his face flushed anyway—burning to the tips of his ears. He pursed his lips together, then stared down at his hands on the duvet. “It’s pretty broken…I’m not sure it’s much of a prize anymore,” he mumbled, trying his best to play along despite the sadness that crept into his words.

He bit his lip, but he felt her warm, gentle hand reach out to take his. He couldn’t look at her face, but he felt her squeeze his hand, heard her voice—quiet but sincere. “I don’t think that’s true.”

As he took a long, shallow breath, Hero shivered, but he wasn’t sure it was from the fever. Zoey let go of his hand immediately.

“You’re trembling. Let’s get you another blanket,” she said, turning towards Kyle’s bed. “You can have Kyle’s. He won’t mind.”

“It’s okay. I have a quilt…It’s under the bed.” Hero struggled to catch his breath as he leaned forward, trying to pull himself out of bed to look for it, but Zoey gently reached out her hand to stop him.

“I’ll get it,” she insisted; then she pulled the quilt out of one of the plastic bins under Hero’s bed—unfurling it then tucking it around him, all the way up to his chin. With a sigh, she ran her hand across the carefully stitched pattern of bright orange and yellow marigolds. “It’s beautiful.”

“My Tía Gloria made it for me after Mari died.” The words just slipped out—automatic, unfiltered. Hero flushed. He hadn’t meant to say that—probably wouldn’t have to anyone else, maybe not even to her if he was a better state.

“Oh Hero…” Zoey began quietly, but Hero cut her off with a fit of coughing that upset his blankets. Zoey pat his back again, but he could feel her tender hand running across his shoulders long after he had stopped coughing.

“Zoey…I…” he began, hoping the words would come to him if he just started talking, but thankfully she cut him off.

“It’s okay. You don’t have to explain anything—unless of course, you want to,” she paused, blinking at him with a soft expression in her eyes. “But I don’t need explanations, especially not now when you’re sick.”

Hero sighed in relief, and hoped the look in his eyes would convey the gratitude he didn’t quite have the strength to express at the moment. “Thank you...”

“Don’t mention it,” shrugged Zoey. “You look tired. You want me to go?”

“You can stay if you want—maybe watch a movie…?”  

Zoey smiled, but as she glanced over at the tv and shelves of tapes which, naturally almost all belonged to Kyle, she teased. “Let me guess: the choices are raunchy comedy or sports biopic?” 

Hero chuckled, lightly, breathily. Zoey certainly knew Kyle and his movie collection very well. He supposed he would expect that given how long the two of them had been friends. “We rented The Godfather from Blockbuster.”

“That’s not bad,” hummed Zoey. “But if we’re talking about Brando’s mob movies, On The Waterfront is better.”

A smile twitched in the corners of Hero’s mouth. “I have that one.”

“Really?” Zoey asked, her brow furrowing, and Hero nodded. “So you really do like old black-and-white movies after all, huh? Here I was thinking you were all talk.”

Hero let out a few chuckling heavy breaths, then swallowed hard. Finally, he took a sip of water trying to cool the burning of his hoarse throat. “I only have a few tapes. Most are in color, but I have some black-and-white.” He paused—shutting his eyes as he tried to clear his head—sifting through the fogginess to focus on his tape collection until he could picture it in the feverish haze of his mind. “Casablanca, Roman Holiday, It’s A Wonderful Life, 12 Angry Men, Christmas in Connecticut…”

“You do not have Christmas in Connecticut over there,” Zoey interrupted in disbelief.

Hero took a deep breath, but he nodded. “It’s on the bottom shelf.”

“I’ve never met another person who has even heard of that movie,” laughed Zoey, but Hero just shrugged, pulling the quilt up around his shoulders again.

“It’s one of my favorites. Always makes me laugh. I love the scene where she tries to flip the flapjacks and the pancake sticks to the ceiling.” Hero laughed then, par for the course, coughed.

“It’s one of my mom’s favorite movies too,” Zoey said as he handed him his water, giving him a firm but gentle pat on the back for good measure. “I used to wonder if that was because the main character falls in love with a navy guy.”

“Like your dad…?” asked Hero, worrying only after the fact that it was a prying question. He didn’t know much about Zoey’s father except that he was an admiral in the navy, and, according to Kyle, particularly stern, serious, and somewhat frightening. Zoey, however, only shrugged.

“I don’t know. I think my dad is a lot rougher around the edges than Jefferson Jones.” Her lips curved into a smile. “Jefferson’s pretty soft—quite the catch actually: sincere, generous, kind, domestic…and he can play piano.”

Hero’s brow furrowed, and he stumbled in confusion, “Is…that a…?”

“Perk?” Zoey finished for him. Then she chuckled dryly and nodded. “Yeah, I think so.”

“Are you just saying that because you know I can play?” asked Hero dryly, but his mouth twitched in the corners.

“You know I’ve never actually heard you play before,” she teased back. “You could be terrible. In which case, it wouldn’t be a perk at all—more like a deterrent.”

Hero chuckled lightly. “I probably am terrible. I’m really rusty, and out of practice.”

“Well, we’ll never know for sure will we.” Her mouth curved into a lopsided grin before her expression softened. “Though Scotty told me you used to be quite the pianist—had a lot of fun with it. What did you used to play when you were in practice?”

“Nothing too complicated. I…I think my favorite song to play was ‘Vienna.’”

“Billy Joel?” asked Zoey, and Hero hummed. “That has a great piano part.”

“Yeah it’s pretty fun. I’ve always been a fan.”

“I can see that…” teased Zoey glancing over at the stack of CDs on Hero’s bedside table. Cold Spring Harbor was on the top—probably because Hero had been listening to a particular song on it on repeat. His face flushed as he thought about why, but he swallowed hard and shrugged his shoulders, trying his best to push the thought away.

“I used to annoy Kel with it a little, I think,” he admitted. “I played it over and over. He once threw a pillow at me while I was practicing and yelled ‘Don’t you know any other songs?’” Hero chuckled breathily, and Zoey laughed.

“When was the last time you played it?”

“I dunno. It’s been years…had to have been before Mari died.” He paused—catching his breath, but he kept talking, almost like he couldn’t stop. “I haven’t really played anything since then. I played a few bars on her piano before her family moved away, but…” His voice hitched, and his chest ached—panging in that all too familiar space in his heart that Mari had left behind. “You know I…honestly I learned to play piano because she loved it. I enjoyed it sure—it was fun, but Mari…Mari was the one who had real passion for music and I guess…I just wanted to be part of that. After she died, I just…I didn’t want to play anymore—didn’t want to play without her.”

Hero stopped—his face flushing. He hadn’t meant to say all of that. Talking about Mari with Zoey was getting easier—clearly, but he wasn’t sure if that was a good thing, just like he wasn’t sure if he would have even said all of that if he hadn’t been sick or feverish. He couldn’t bring himself to look at her, to know that he made the smile disappear from her face, made something sad pass over her eyes.

“I’m sorry…” he began to apologize. “I keep talking about her…” Swallowing hard, he stared down intently at his quilt—running his hands over the thoughtfully embroidered orange and yellow marigolds—a symbol of hope, remembrance, a connection that endures even after death.

“It’s okay, Hero…” said Zoey, quiet, gentle as she reached out to pat his hand. “And it’s okay if you never want to play piano again either. You don’t have to. It’s nothing to feel guilty about.”

Hero took a long breath, watching as Zoey’s fingers slipped between his. He curled his hand catching hers—intertwining their fingers, holding on tightly to her. “I’d play for you if you wanted…”

“I know you would,” Zoey replied with a tilt of her head and a kind smile. “And as much as I would love to hear you play piano, I’d only want you to play because that’s what you wanted—not because you felt obligated. Someday if you see a piano and you just feel like playing, I hope you will and then you can call me and play for me, but don’t force yourself. It should be something that makes you happy, like it used to.”

Hero’s chest ached, but he managed the twitch of a bantering smile as he asked dryly, “How else will I pay you back for taking care of me when I was sick?”

“Oh, don’t worry about that. Our debts are paid,” she insisted with a dismissive wave of her hand. “You took care of me first remember, and besides I’ve already gotten my reward which is getting to see you in your grandpa pajamas,” she teased winking playfully at him.

“Zoey!” Hero burst into a fit of laughter mixed with intense, nasty coughing.

“If you’re going to have a coughing fit every time you laugh, do you really think we should watch this movie?” she quipped, but Hero shrugged.

“It’s fine. I’m probably just going to fall asleep anyway.”

Chuckling, Zoey got up from her seat and put the tape into the VCR with a “Okay. Whatever you say” then she curled up on the edge of Kyle’s bed—pulling her knees to her chest as she leaned back into his mountain of throw pillows.

Hero chuckled a little himself before his weary eyes started drooping again. He had been right, of course. He started nodding off during the opening credits and was sound asleep before he even got anywhere close to his favorite flapjack scene. He wasn’t sure if he had dreamed it or imagined it in a half-asleep daze, but he could have sworn that once the movie had ended, he had felt gentle fingers tangling in his hair as it was pushed out of his forehead and Zoey’s voice whispering, “C.J.’s back now and will keep an eye on you, so I’m going to head out. You take care of yourself, Henry…”

*-*-*

Two Weeks Later…

“You made it!” exclaimed Kel excitedly as Hero walked through the front door with his suitcase. Kel threw his arms around him, hugging him tightly.

“Sorry it took so long,” Hero chuckled lightly as he scratched the back of his neck somewhat sheepishly.

“Are you feeling better at least?” asked Kel with a kind smile, and Hero nodded.

“Yeah…I was only sick for a couple of days, and my friends looked after me.” Hero paused, meeting Kel’s eyes with an expression that said more than his words, “Thanks for that, Kel.”

Kel flushed a little, but he laughed. So Hero had figured that out after all? He should’ve expected that from his brother. He was always so smart. Luckily, he didn’t seem to mind too much that Kel had meddled, not that he’d really tell him if he had. Still Kel smiled and teased, “Hey, no problem. You’re lucky I didn’t drive up there myself.”  

“Your father and I almost drove up too,” said their mom before she pulled Hero into another hug herself. “It was horrible thinking of you so sick in the city all alone.”

Hero’s face softened, as he pulled away from their mother to look her in the eyes. “I was fine, Mom. Please don’t worry.”

“Hero! Hero! Wanna play zoo?” exclaimed Sally, twirling around him with her favorite plastic animal toys until he scooped her up into a hug.

“Of course, Sally, but uh…”

“Give him a minute,” Kel interjected with a good-natured laugh. “He hasn’t even taken his coat off yet.

“Oh let me take that,” said their dad—patting Hero heartily on the back as he slipped his arms out of his coat. “It’s good to have you home.”

“Good to be home, Dad,” Hero replied with a kind smile.

“Let me take your bag upstairs,” exclaimed Kel reaching for the suitcase Hero had brought with him, but his brother reached out a hand to stop him.

“Oh…you don’t have to do that. I can get it.”

Kel waved his hand at him. “Don’t be silly. It’s just upstairs. Come on. You can freshen up for dinner too.”

“I made all your favorites,” said Mom. “And I even ordered a hero sandwich for you from Gino’s.”

Hero scratched the back of his neck—the slightest tint of pink in his cheeks. “Thanks, Mom, but you really didn’t have to go through all that trouble.”

Kel snickered and was still snickering as Hero followed him up the stairs. “You know Mom’s just going to make a big deal out of every time you visit even if you tell her not to, right?”

Hero sighed conceding, “Yeah…”

As Kel opened the door to their room, he set Hero’s suitcase down on his bed—still perfectly made from the last time he had visited, but as he turned back to his brother he paused, tilting his head curiously as he watched Hero staring wide-eyed at their old keyboard, pushed up against the wall next to the door.

“Oh uh…yeah…we found that when we were cleaning out the garage—” Kel shrugged, scratching the nape of his neck. “Thought we might as well set it up again.”

“Are you going to start playing again?” Hero asked, and Kel laughed.

“Nah. I don’t think I can even read music anymore, but maybe Sally will want to. She likes to come in here and bang on it sometimes—doesn’t sound much like music though.”

Hero chuckled, but before he could say anything, Kel said, “Or you could…if you wanted. I found a bunch of your old books and sheet music and stuff.” He motioned to a box on the ground near the keyboard, but he twisted his mouth to the side. He didn’t want to seem pushy. He knew Hero hadn’t played since Mari had died, and he probably wouldn’t want to ever again. Kel supposed, it was just one of those things his brother just couldn’t bring himself to do without Mari.

Kel sighed—blinking at Hero’s unreadable expression. Had it made him sad? He couldn’t tell. Maybe he should have given him a heads up about the keyboard or hidden it in the garage or something while he was visiting?

“Yeah. Thanks, Kel,” shrugged Hero, clearly putting this conversation to rest.

“Well uh…” Kel began to stumble before his mother’s voice called for him.

“Kel, can you come give me a hand for a minute?”

“Sure, Mom!” he yelled before turning back to Hero with a somewhat helpless shrug of his shoulders. “Hey, uh…I’ll be right back okay?”

Hero nodded, and Kel disappeared through the doorway. He shook his head. Why did everything have to be so awkward?

Kel sighed, and his chest ached. He knew why. But he swallowed hard—pushing the thought away, focusing instead on helping his mom set the table. As he was setting out some silverware, he stopped abruptly—his ears perking up at the sound of distant music, a familiar progression of notes he recognized.

“Do you hear that?” gasped Kel in disbelief, but it seemed his mom could only blink at him with wide, surprised eyes as Sally gushed and giggled.

“So pretty!”

Kel nearly dropped the silverware he was holding—fumbling around with the forks and spoons until he finally dropped them in a disorganized heap on the table and raced up the stairs—that all-too-familiar song growing louder and louder. As he burst through the door of his room, he could scarcely believe his eyes. Hero was sitting at the keyboard—his hands gliding across the keys playing music again.

“Hero?” Kel choked in a breathy disbelief which must have startled his brother because he stopped playing abruptly—clearly bumping the wrong keys in surprise creating a dissonant chord.

“Oh uh…sorry…” he mumbled, his face flushing somewhat sheepishly as he fidgeted—recoiling his hands away from the keyboard. “I just uh…I saw the keyboard and…wanted to play…”

Kel could only blink at him with wide, dark eyes. “You wanted to play piano?”

Hero’s blush deepened, but he nodded. “Yeah…uh…” He scratched the back of his neck. “I know you don’t really like that song but the music was on the top of the stack and…”

His voice trailed, and Kel’s expression softened, brightening into a wide smile. He supposed Hero was right. Once, what felt like a lifetime ago, he had given his brother all kinds of grief for playing that particular song over and over, but in the years that had followed, he would have given anything to hear him play it one more time, would have given anything to hear him play again. And now that he hadn’t heard it in so long—now that their room, their home had been quiet and empty for so long…

“I…I can try to play something else…” Hero chuckled awkwardly, but Kel cut him off.  

“No, I’ve never been happier to hear anything in my whole life.”

Hero laughed lightly, and his mouth curved into a smile—a real one that reached his eyes.

Kel’s chest ached. He had missed that even more than the music. He rushed forward—throwing his arms around his brother and hugging him tightly, hoping that gesture would say more than his words ever could.

“Kel!” Hero gasped quietly, leaning backward in surprise, his shoulders stiffening a little before he relaxed. He wrapped his arms around his brother, running his hand across his back as Kel pressed his chin to his shoulder.

Kel shut his eyes tightly, but he whispered with the brightest smile on his face, “It’s so good to have you back.”

He could feel the chuckle reverberating in Hero’s chest before his brother patted him on the head and whispered, “It’s good to be back.”

#ah yes suffering favs...my favorite #omori hero #hero omori #kel omori #omori kel #hero and kel's brotherly bond #it's the brothers 💙🧡 #i really just want the brothers to hug okay? #let the brothers hug!!! #hero deserves to be happy #kel also deserves to be happy #omori oc: zoey #omori spoilers #hero friendships #when sun shines again⛅ #hero fic #our content #thanks for reading #self indulgence at its finest #happy birthday to me

[acacia-may]

Do you have any songs for Hero from Omori for the game? Thanks

Oh my goodness I have so many songs for Hero from OMORI that it'll honestly be hard to narrow it down 😅, but I'll share a couple of my favorites plus some related Hero post-"Truth" headcanons! Thanks for playing my song + headcanon game and for the chance for some Hero appreciation (he really deserves it 💙).

I've put your songs and headcanons below the cut because of MAJOR OMORI spoilers (and warnings for the heavy themes & subject matter (i.e. grief, death, mental health issues) that go along with that).

There really are so many songs out there that remind me of Hero (who is probably tied for the title of my favorite OMORI character), and honestly, I didn't know how angsty you wanted to go with this ask so I've chosen two songs: a sad one and a less sad one.

Sad Song Choice: "Older Than I Am" by Lennon Stella

I feel like this just might be the ultimate Hero song. I mean with opening lines like "My heart's seen things I wish it didn't/Somewhere I lost some of my innocence, and I miss it" how could it not be? There's something so hauntingly tragic about this song, and I think it just fits Hero so well given how he has been through so much in his life and how he has had to grow up far too quickly. He prides himself on doing everything right, on taking care of everyone else around him and never wanting to be a burden on anyone ("I do all my own healing/Manage all of my feelings/I don't ask for help, no/'Cause I don't need it"), but sometimes it does get to be a lot for him: leaves him faking happiness and contentment while really he is breaking inside and feeling lonely and listless as he tries to keep up this charade of being "fine" ("Why am I always the one making decisions?/How do I handle the pressure?/I do my best to fake it, but honestly I hate it").

There are probably times when he wishes he "could do something stupid" and "be kinda reckless." There is probably a part of him that wishes he could "just say to hell with all [his] plans"--could "say I don't give a damn," but the problem is he does give a damn--he cares too much. He's too responsible, too dutiful, too conflict-avoidant, and too worried about hurting and burdening everyone else. Ultimately, he would never do those any of those things because just like the singer in the song, he would stop himself and be forced to admit that no matter how much he wishes he could just throw in the towel, set aside this "perfect" facade for just a minute, he won't--he can't because he's Hero and there is always that voice in the back of his head reminding him "But I'm older than I am" and stopping him.

Lennon Stella - Older Than I Am (Lyrics) - YouTube

Less Sad Song Choice: "Two" by Sleeping At Last (A/N: it’s not really that sad of a song but the Hero context makes everything sadder)

I'm not even sure where to start with this song since there are so many lines that make me think of Hero starting not least of all with the very first: "sweetheart, you look a little tired--when did you last eat?" Beyond just his penchant for cooking for his loved ones, Hero really wants nothing more than to take care of people. He has such a genuine generosity and selflessness that he truly "will love you without a single string attached" and would not hesitate to put someone else and their needs in front of his own--bending over backwards to help them or make them happy, even if it is at his own expense or to his own detriment ("you know I’ll take my heart clean apart, if it helps yours beat" and "you can take the oxygen straight out of my own chest.").

While he would be the first to offer help, support, even the shirt off his back to someone who needed it, he struggles with asking for help himself, can't stand being the center of attention, and does not like talking about himself or his own problems because he deeply fears being a burden to others ("no, I don’t want to talk about myself—tell me where it hurts."). After he begins to heal from that period of deep depression he experienced immediately following the loss of Mari, Hero consistently buries his own pain, grief, and sadness--deeply afraid of hurting or burdening his family, friends, or any of his loved ones like that again (even though, of course, the ones who love him want to be there to support him, no matter what he's going through).

He knows he's wounded and hurting, but he pushes it aside in favor of helping others. When Sunny finds him at Mari's piano in the middle of the night, for instance, Hero is "fine"—immediately jumping into trying to support and comfort Sunny, but if you go back into the room immediately afterwards, Hero is crying by himself, just unwilling and unable to express his own pain and sadness to someone else. It's absolutely that "I just want to build you up, build you up ’til you’re good as new, and maybe one day I will get around to fixing myself too" sentiment.

Finally, the line "I just want to love you, to love you, to love you well. I just want to learn how, somehow, to be loved myself" in the bridge just gives me chills when I think about in the context of Hero. He is such a big-hearted, empathetic, and sincerely loving person, but he deeply struggles to accept the love and support from others that he gives away so generously.

Sleeping At Last - "Two" (Official Lyric Video) - YouTube

Here Are Some Hero Post-"The Truth" Headcanons Inspired by These Songs:

When Hero learns "The Truth," he quietly excuses himself from the room to deal with and process his emotions alone. He feels overwhelmed, hurt, upset, angry, heartbroken and so many other stormy, complicated emotions, and despite (perhaps) wishing he could unleash that whole internal turmoil, he stops himself--recalling with a painful regret that one (1) time he lashed out at Kel after Mari's death and knowing that he is not that 15 (or 16) year old boy anymore. He is an adult (albeit a 19-year-old adult but still an adult), and he will act like one, regardless of how he feels on the inside because he really is older than he is.

After crying bitterly alone and trying his best to make sense of the Truth and of everything he is feeling, Hero experiences a moment in which it really just "clicks" in his head that even if he has complex feelings about Sunny and Basil right now, Sunny and Basil are suffering in a similar way to how Hero himself suffered for years. Hero has blamed himself for what happened to Mari all this time--mentally beating himself up for not even knowing she was depressed and driving himself in painful circles wondering if he had just reached out to her, had made sure she understood she could aways open up to him, had been more of a support to her, had better expressed how much he cared about her, had held onto her tighter, had loved her better--had loved her more would things have been different? He has carried that weight around for 4 years--blaming himself for her death, and now he sees Sunny and Basil doing the same thing--granted under wildly different (more culpable despite it being an accident) circumstances but the feelings & pain of that overwhelming guilt are very similar, and Hero knows how painful and what a heavy burden that is.

In the end, it's almost like the complicated feelings he might have about Sunny and Basil due to the truth get overshadowed by Hero’s empathy and the fact that he cares for them deeply as if they were his own little brothers, and that is what finally gives him some clarity.

He returns to the room and actually apologizes himself both for suddenly disappearing and for the fact that this has all happened the way it did. He starts to tear up again as he hugs Sunny then Basil, reassuring them that Mari would want them to forgive themselves.

This is not to say that Hero doesn't still have some serious inner turmoil and angst surrounding "The Truth" and all the pain it and its cover up has caused. He does wrestle with complicated feelings towards both Basil and Sunny for some time afterwards (he is only human after all); however, this remains internal turmoil, as Hero absolutely sees it as something he needs to work through on his own with time (and hopefully, eventually, some desperately needed therapy). Additionally, having matured and learned from his one (1) fight with Kel after Mari's death, he does not take this out on Sunny or Basil--not wanting to have to repeat what is one of the greatest regrets of his life (lashing out at his brother).

Even if it takes him a little time, Hero ultimately is one of the most empathetic to Sunny and Basil's feelings surrounding Mari’s death—particularly their guilt, and it is in recognizing a lot of himself and his own grief, pain and guilt in Sunny & Basil that he finally reaches a place of healing and forgiveness with them.

Additionally, in reconciling himself to the situation and making peace with that happened, Hero ultimately blames Mari’s “bad knee”/knee injury for her death more than Sunny, choosing to believe that Sunny didn’t push her that hard so it was really the fact that her bad knee gave out that made her fall down the stairs, whereas an uninjured person wouldn’t have fallen. This inspires him to take a Physical Medicine and Rehabilitation (PM&R) residency when he graduates from medical school, and he becomes a pediatric physiatrist: treating injured children and coordinating rehabilitative medicine after their injuries. He sees it as his way to give back (in a healthy way, of course) and finds a sense of purpose in trying to prevent another tragedy like that from happening by helping other injured children in their recovery.

#hero omori #omori hero #hero omori headcanons #hero headcanons #hero character analysis #hero deserves to be happy #poor hero #he needs a hug #i love him so much it breaks my heart #hero appreciation 💙 #this is so self indulgent ngl #song + headcanon game #omori spoilers

[wehadabondingmoment]

Ok so I finished beau by @buggachat and Adrinette dancing made me think about how at home they must have felt, dancing in their partner's arms asdjkds

#the hero parts of the outfit have no lineart because they're not actually heroes #but this scene killed me #the way they looked at each other #aaaaa #so the hero outfit thingy us more in their imagination #because that last part just once again made me think about how they finally finally found their home #“happy heroes day” sobbing #the symbolism #it's heroes day and they've found each other and god #ladynoir #beau #bakery enemies au #buggachat fanart #because you deserve it #miraculous #love square #adrinette #ladybug #chat noir

[upperranktwo]

☆Tomura Shigaraki☆

Happy Birthday Adrienne ♡ @tenkoushimura​

#bnhaedit #bnhasource #dailyanime #fyanimegifs #boku no academia #my hero academia #shigaraki tomura #sky gifs #usergojoana #usermica #tuserelena #usergokalp #useraki #userokkottsus #happy birthday bestie <3333 I hope you like this <3333 #had to gif your URL namesake just for youuuu!!!! #I don't gif bnha enough I need to change that!!! I love shigaraki he is so cute!!!! #he was so small I cry!!! #middle gif was so hard to colour but it's there to break things up! Wanted to do almost a timeline set if you get me!!! #I love youuuu you deserve the best in the world <3 #Hope this looks okay to everyone else <3333

[spicassis]

❤️

#solangelo #Will solace #Nico di Angelo #the sun and the star #tsats #loves #PJO #pjo fanart #hoo #Heroes of Olympus #toa #trials of apollo #they deserve love #let them be cringe and happy #do not separate them #DO NOT REPOST

[sapphicsparkles]

My Bo-Katan piece for the @forcefatalezine !!! Absolutely loved this project! Everything was beautifully done and the mods were a joy to work with!

#I am almost never happy with my finished work #but i'm satisfied with this one #my art #but I think my work of Bo tends to come out the best because I love her with my entire being #put my entire Bo-Katussy into this #fuck that jetpack though #bo-katan kryze #ex terrorist of my heart #dyke of my dreams #if you don't love her as a vicious and bitchy terrorist you don't deserve her as a hero and Mand'alor #star wars #the mandalorian #fanart #force fatale zine #zine art #illustration

[kynamo]

HAPPY (late) BIRTHDAY IZUKU!!

i was listening to see you again the day before his birthday and this came to me like a vision

#bkdk #bakudeku #bkdk art #my art #my hero academia #boku no hero acedamia #bnha midoriya #bnha bakugou #bnha deku #bnha kacchan #happy birthday deku #love him #they deserve to hold hands and reach the stars <3 #their rings say “win to save” and “save to win” #you know how it is

[ferahntics]

Deliver Him

#crystals hard to draw #galacta knight #morpho knight #aeon hero #mine #my art #kirby #kirby fan art #perspective hard but funnn #let him rest #or let him be happy pls he deserves it

[kelin-is-writing]

Dabi looks so done with Endeavor and honestly same hubby, same 😭💜

#boku no hero academia #my hero academia #bnha #mha #dabi #touya todoroki #bnha dabi #mha dabi #HE CAME 4TH THIS TIME AND I’M SO DAMN HAPPY FOR REAL BECAUSE HE THE BEST CHARACTER IN BNHA BUT GETS PAID DUST— #like— he literally deserves to be 1st but whatever because of course bakugou midoriya and shoto will be the top3 so duh lmfao #BUT HIM BEING 4TH????? FUCKING DESERVE. GO OFF KING. #ACTUALLY he looks done with pretty much everyone and tbh it can happen #still yeah he has shoto there with him so at least he has someone 🤧💜

[epickiya722]

Thinking about all those posts and fics and whatnot about Midoriya losing his arm(s). Hey, how does it feel TO BREAK MY HEART?!

AND ALL THOSE TIMES HIS ARMS WERE WRECKED, THAT SHIT WAS FORESHADOWED, HUH?!

#WHAT DID HE DO TO DESERVE THAT?! HUH?! #Y'ALL HAPPY?! I'M NOT!! #just kiya's thoughts #bnha #mha #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #bnha 419 #bnha manga spoilers #bnha spoilers #midoriya izuku #izuku midoriya #deku

[theteapotofdoom]

Okay but the thing is!!! The thing is!!! No matter what happens to Tomura at the end of MHA!!! We absolutely HAVE to be funny about it!!! For real even if we get the worst possible outcome we simply MUST clown, we must make memes this is so important!!!!

#this post doesn’t make sense I don’t know how to exprès this property #but it’s important to me #we need to be funny about Tomura no matter what #because he brought us all so much joy for almost ten years #so no matter what Horikoshi decides for him Tomura deserves a happy send off #my hero academia #mha #bnha #boku no hero academia #shigaraki tomura #tomura shigaraki #shimura tenko

[hero-deserves-to-be-happy]

When Sun Shines Again Chapter 4: "To Lead A Better Life:" Part 3

⛅CHAPTER 4⛅ "To Lead A Better Life" Part 3

Chapter Description: When Hero visits Basil one last time before returning to college for the fall semester, Basil gives him a letter that forces him to confront bittersweet memories, painful truths, and the complicated feelings that Hero had tried so hard to bury.

This Chapter is Hero & Basil's Friendship-Centric.

Chapter Word Count: 6700. Link to Chapter 4 on AO3.

Description (for the entire work): When tragedy struck, Hero lost not only his dearest friend but also his dreams for the future. Even years later, Hero doesn't know what his "forever" looks like without Mari in it, but somehow he finds the strength to carry on and build a new life for himself. With his family and friends both old and new by his side, Hero struggles through life's ups and downs--the joys and sorrows he faces in a world without Mari. In the beginning, he's only looking to survive it all, but somewhere along the way, he might find a purpose, a reason he's still here. Maybe there really is a way he can learn to be happy again, and maybe, just maybe, when he's least expecting it, he might even find himself slowly opening his heart to love again--he might even find himself believing that even the darkest, stormiest of times will eventually pass and the sun will shine again.

A Hero-Centric story spanning 15 years of his life post-good end. Focuses on Hero finding healing & building a life for himself after the loss of Mari. Eventually includes him learning to love again after an extremely slow burn. All pairings are tagged upfront. Rated T for heavy themes & some language. Reading the prequel is recommended.

⛅Tags For The Story As A Whole (So A Lot Of These Are "Eventual" Tags):

Romantic Relationships: Main Ships: (Past) Hero/Mari and (Eventual) Hero/OC. Side Ships: Brandi/OC and a brief mention of Mikhael/Bebe are the only side ships involving canon characters.

Platonic Relationships: Hero & Brandi Friendship, Hero & Original Characters Friendship. Some Hero & Kel Siblings Relationship & Brotherly Friendship. Hero & Aubrey Friendship. Hero & Basil Friendship. Hero & Sunny Friendship. Hero & His Family.

Characters: Major Canon Characters: Hero (POV Character), Brandi [Intimidating Girl], Mari and Mari's Memory, & Kel. Major Original Characters (Hero's college friends): Kyle, C.J., Zoey, Tamra, and Lorraine. Other Included Canon Characters: Sunny, Basil, Aubrey, Sally, Hero's Parents, Bebe (Short Haired Girl/Fountain Girl) & Mikhael (The Maverick).

Genre: Hero-Centric Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Slice of Life, College Life, Lost Love, Finding Love Again, Finding Healing After Grief, Slow Burn, Developing Friendship, Developing Relationship, Greiving, Catharsis, Heart-To-Heart Chats, Hopeful/Happy Ending, Post-Good Ending, Hero Needs A Hug, Hero Deserves To Be Happy

Rating: T for some heavy themes and thematic elements (i.e. grief & healing from grief and trauma. Implied/Referenced Canonical Character Death & Implied/Referenced Mental Health Issues including depression & suicide. Mentions of Underage Drinking & Partying). Some language.

Warnings: Major Spoilers for OMORI! Heavy themes and thematic elements (i.e. grief & healing from grief and trauma. Implied/Referenced Canonical Character Death & Implied/Referenced Mental Health Issues including depression & suicide. Mentions of Underage Drinking & Partying). Some Language.

Link to Entire work on AO3.

⛅ Link to the "When Sun Shines Again" Masterlist. ⛅

Full chapter text below the cut. Thank you for reading! ⛅

“Do you have any sevens?” asked Kel.

Twisting her mouth to one side, Aubrey frowned at her cards, but she shrugged her shoulders. “No. Go fish.”

Curiously, Hero glanced down at his own hand, then at a nearby clock on the wall. They had been playing Go Fish for nearly an hour, and Hero couldn’t for the life of him understand how no one had managed to win yet. Even thinking back on the many rounds of Go Fish he and his friends had played in their youth, he couldn’t remember a game that lasted more than half an hour, at the most, but it seemed that ever since they had started playing cards with Basil whenever they visited him in the hospital the games were growing longer and longer.

Hero wondered if that was on purpose—if his companions were somehow purposely dragging the games out so they would have something to do, something to keep Basil distracted so he wouldn’t start crying again. After all, their first couple of visits had mostly consisted of Basil weeping in tearful apologies, and Hero was certain he was not the only one who wanted to avoid that going forward.

Something ached in Hero’s chest whenever he thought of how emotional things had been in the beginning—how fragile Basil had been and that heartbreaking look on his face like he was always on the verge of tears. If Hero was being honest, it scared him, and though it made him feel overwhelmingly guilty to admit it, somehow he couldn’t help but wonder if that’s what his family had seen every time they had looked at him after Mari had died: a shaking, shivering shell of a person they had once known and loved. It was painful to watch, and as much as his heart ached seeing Basil suffer, he could only imagine that his family had suffered even more in watching Hero, himself, suffer in the same way. Knowing he had put his family through that… It was nearly enough to make Hero not want to get out of bed in the morning.

There was something surreal in being on this side of it all. Even having gone through a similar period of deep depression himself—even knowing firsthand how painful and hopeless that darkness and numbness could be, Hero felt completely helpless when it came to Basil and his suffering. He had no idea what to do—if there was even anything he could do to make Basil feel better. This feeling of helplessness coupled with the sickening, twisting feeling in his gut whenever Basil burst into tears at the mere sight of him had given Hero a new and incredibly painful appreciation for Kel and what his brother must have been through these last couple of years stuck on the periphery of his loved ones’ collapsing world. But maybe that was Kel’s strength. He could be so supportive and attentive to the needs of the other people around him, and he just had this way of knowing what might help someone, even someone at their lowest, feel better. It had been his idea to start playing cards to cheer up Basil, after all.

After a long and ongoing debate about whether or not the three of them should just stop visiting Basil altogether, Hero, Kel, and Aubrey had sat down with Polly to discuss whether or not their visits were actually helpful or were just hindering Basil’s recovery, which, Hero knew, was the last thing any of them wanted. When Polly had told them that she thought that it would be much more hurtful to Basil if his friends never came around, Kel had suggested that they try to think of activities to do when they visited so Basil would be too busy to think about being sad.

It turned out Kel was right. They soon found that their visits with Basil at the hospital went much more smoothly if they all did an activity together—sometimes a puzzle, other times arts and crafts. They quickly settled into playing board games or, more frequently, cards just like they used to when they were kids.

As time went on, Basil seemed much happier, especially when he was distracted. The color slowly returned to his face. He started tending some flowers in the hospital’s garden and even started taking some photos again. Most promising of all, the last time they had visited, Hero saw Basil laugh for the first time in possibly years at a silly joke Kel had told them about a pirate’s pet parrot of all things. It was good to see Basil beginning to heal and come back to his old self again. Still, they didn’t want to undo any progress so they kept playing infinite games of cards which, if Hero had to guess, they probably did drag out on purpose, at least on a subconscious level.

“Are you sure you don’t have any sevens?” asked Kel, pulling Hero out of his thoughts. His brow furrowed as he glanced over at Aubrey with narrowed eyes.

“No,” she huffed, growing more exasperated. “I don’t have any sevens, Kel.”

 “I—I have sevens,” sniffled Basil “You—you can have my sevens…”

“Sweet!” exclaimed Kel, reaching across the table to take Basil’s cards, but Hero gently stopped him with a pat on the arm.

“Kel, that’s not fair. You can ask Basil for sevens on your next turn.”

Basil sniffled again, pulling his sweater tightly around his shoulders. “It…It’s okay. I don’t mind. Kel can—”

“You’re ruining the game!” Aubrey interrupted with a huff. “It’s just Go Fish. There’s no reason to get so competitive about it!”

“Competitive?” Kel repeated so loudly that Basil practically jumped. “If anyone’s getting competitive, it’s you!”

As Kel and Aubrey began to bicker, Hero looked over at Basil with a certain concern in his eyes. Hero had always known that Basil was almost as conflict avoidant as him, and it was obvious from the way he cowered at Kel and Aubrey’s bickering—twisting his hands and biting his lip—that he would give just about anything for this fight to be over, including an entire hand full of sevens, if he’d had them. If Hero was being honest, he felt the same way.

“C-c’mon now,” Hero gently interrupted, trying to keep the peace “This is just supposed to be fun. We’re here to visit Basil and spend time with him. There’s no reason to start fighting.”

Kel and Aubrey stopped—each letting out a heavy sigh as they stared down at their hands of cards. “Hero’s right,” said Kel “Who cares about this stupid card game—we’re just happy to see you Basil. We can even do something else if you want.”

Basil’s eyes widened, but a smile twitched in the corners of his mouth. “I don’t care what we do—I’m just glad you’re here. It’s really good to see you guys.” Basil paused and sighed. “It gets…kind of lonely here sometimes.”

Something ached in Hero’s chest, and his expression softened. He couldn’t help but feel sorry for Basil all alone in the hospital far away from his family and friends. Even if he knew it was the best thing for him and was glad that he was getting the help that he needed, it made Hero sad to think that Basil was going through such a difficult time alone.

Hero sighed. He supposed Basil had been suffering alone for a very, very long time, and regardless of the complicated feelings that Hero himself may have been feeling towards Basil and everything that had happened, it was more important to him that Basil wouldn’t have to suffer by himself anymore—that he would never have to suffer by himself again.

He supposed Aubrey had eventually realized she felt this way too. It wasn’t long after their conversation about Basil and her complicated feelings towards him a couple of weeks ago that Aubrey had started visiting Basil again. She had never talked to Hero about it, but he could only assume that, like him, ultimately the love, friendship, and concern she had for Basil far outweighed her own hurts and feelings.

It meant a lot to Hero to see Aubrey offer Basil forgiveness, even when it was hard, and he knew how much it meant to Basil that she was there for him—that they were all there for him, even after everything that had happened. These days, it felt like the only person who hadn’t forgiven Basil was Basil himself, but Hero knew that would be the hardest part of all.

“Don’t worry, Basil,” Kel reassured him, patting his arm. “I’m sure you’ll get to come home really soon.”

Basil bit his lip but nodded as he quietly admitted, “I hope so…I uh…I’ve been really worried…about my flowers.”

“Oh you don’t have to worry about those. Hero has been taking care of them for you!” Kel beamed at Basil, giving him a pat on the back.

Basil’s eyes widened, but his hands began to tremble as he turned towards Hero. “Oh…you didn’t have to do that.”

“It’s no trouble at all,” Hero gently insisted with a slight smile. “Your house is on my way home from the pool, so I stop by on my way home from work. It barely takes any time at all, and it’s nice to have a hobby. Besides, Polly has been doing most of the work.”

“Aubrey and I have been helping out too,” added Kel. “But we’re not as good at gardening as you or Hero.”

Basil cleared his throat. “Well, thank you—all of you. I really appreciate it. I just…”  He paused, biting his lip and staring at his twisting hands. “I just…hope it’s not ruining your summer or taking up too much of your time.”

Aubrey, Kel and Hero quickly glanced at each other with somewhat awkward smiles—silently agreeing not to tell Basil that this had probably been one of the worst summers of their entire lives even without having to look after his garden for him. Hero had spent most of it working long hours at the community pool, cleaning his house, tending Basil’s garden, going for runs around the neighborhood, and desperately looking for anything else that would take his mind off of things. He craved being busy, but more than that he craved a distraction from his crumbling world. Sunny had moved. Basil was in the hospital. Kel and Aubrey were struggling. Everything in Hero’s life seemed to fall apart again this summer—collapsing under the weight of the truth. He could only imagine that Aubrey and Kel felt the same way. They couldn’t wait for this summer to finally be over…but they could never say that to Basil who stared up at them with frightened but hopeful eyes.

“How—how are you all doing?” Basil stumbled, in what Hero could only guess was a desperate attempt to fill the silence. “Is there…anything new and exciting in Faraway Town?”

Hero wracked his brain, but he couldn’t think of even one piece of good news to tell Basil. From the look on Aubrey’s face, it seemed she couldn’t think of one either. They both turned to Kel, who twisted his mouth to one side—his brow furrowing thoughtfully as if he, too, was scrounging to think of something positive to say.

“Uhhh… Hero got a postcard all the way from Venice, Italy.”

“Well…that’s pretty cool” said Basil with a slight smile.

Hero shrugged his shoulders. He supposed it was kind of sad that the most exciting thing that had happened all summer was that he had gotten a postcard from Italy, but his family, Kel especially, had been very fascinated by it. They had never gotten something in the mail from somewhere so far away before.

“It was really cool!” exclaimed Kel “It had a bridge on it.”

“Who was it from?” asked Basil.

“My friend from college, Kyle, sent it to me while his family was on vacation there,” said Hero. “It has the Bridge of Sighs on it. Kyle said he always buys postcards with bridges on them because one of his best friends is a civil engineering major and wants to build bridges someday. He gets her postcards of local bridges from all of his vacation destinations, but he had an extra one this time so he sent it to me.”

Basil smiled. “That was really nice of him. I think my parents went to Venice once. I saw pictures of it, and it was really pretty. I’ve always wanted to go someday”

“Then you should!” interjected Kel “We should all go. Someday when you get out of this place and we’re all grown up and stuff, we should all go to Venice—and then we can ride on those cool boats they have there!”

“They’re called gondolas, Kel,” Aubrey corrected with a huff.  

Kel rolled his eyes, but he beamed at Basil. “Sunny can come too. It’ll be an adventure!”

Aubrey sighed. “It’ll be years before we’ll be able to go to Venice, Kel. We might not ever be able to go there.”

“Well…” said Kel. “In the meantime, maybe Hero can bring his postcard to show Basil the next time we come to visit.”

“Oh wow!” Basil’s face seemed to light up as he smiled at his friends. “I’d love to see it.”

With a shrug of his shoulders, Hero tilted his head and gave Basil a bittersweet smile. “I’d love to show you my postcard, Basil. I’m sorry I didn’t bring it. I didn’t know that you wanted to see it. Unfortunately, I don’t think I’ll be able to come visit you again because I have to go back to college next week.”

Basil’s face fell, but Hero could tell he tried his best to smile at him. “That’s okay” he said. “The doctor doesn’t think I’ll have to stay in the hospital for too much longer anyway. He hopes I’ll get to go home by the time school starts again.”

“That’s awesome Basil!” exclaimed Kel, and Aubrey nodded in agreement.

“I’m so happy to hear that,” said Hero. “I’m sure Kel and Aubrey will take really good care of you and help you get settled back in when school starts.”

“Yeah,” agreed Kel “And if anyone gives you weird looks or something, Aubrey will just beat them up with her nail bat.”

“Kel!” huffed Aubrey.

Before anybody could say anything more, however, the nurse came by to tell them that visiting hours were almost over and that they would have to leave soon. Aubrey and Kel both got up from the table to go to the bathroom before their long drive back to Faraway Town, leaving Hero and Basil alone.

“Are you excited—to be going back to college?” asked Basil.

Hero bit his lip. The honest answer was yes. In fact, he had never been happier to go back to anywhere in his entire life—though he supposed that wasn’t an entirely fair statement. It wasn’t going back to college that Hero was looking forward to—it was the idea of this long, horrible summer finally being over.

He didn’t want to upset Basil by telling him that, however, so he merely shrugged with half a smile and said “A little. It’ll be hard to leave my family again but…I missed school and my friends in the city. Plus, I made plans to see Sunny”

“Really?” asked Basil.

“Yeah. I called him last week and asked if I could take him to one of my favorite coffee places near campus. It’ll be nice to see him again and see how he’s settling in after the move.”

Basil’s expression softened, and he smiled. “I’m so glad to hear that. I’m sure it will mean a lot to Sunny that you want to visit him.” He paused, fumbling around for something in the pocket of his sweater. “That reminds me, I have a letter for Sunny. Do you think you could give it to him for me?”

Hero nodded. “Of course”

“I have one for you too,” Basil continued, handing Hero two envelopes. They were both heavy and lumpy like two small packages rather than letters. Whatever letters were inside must be several pages long.

Hero swallowed hard—trying his best to calm himself with a deep breath. He could only imagine what his letter said, but the truth was, he didn’t want to imagine it. He wasn’t sure he even wanted to read it.

For the entire summer, Hero had been trying his absolute best not to think about what Basil had done. He hadn’t lied to Aubrey when he told her he wasn’t angry with Basil, but he knew there were still complicated feelings, hurts, there under the surface. He supposed he had been running from them—pushing them aside like a kind of self-preservation or, perhaps more accurately, a somewhat desperate attempt at triage.

Triage, Hero thought. That certainly seemed like a good word for it.

In a medical ethics class he had taken last semester, Hero had learned about disaster triage or how to prioritize individual emergencies during a large-scale disaster. It was the best metaphor he could think of for how this summer had felt, especially as far as Basil was concerned. Whatever Hero may have felt or may have been dealing with on his own—it was small and inconsequential compared to Basil’s well-being when he was so fragile and such a danger to himself. Hero knew that he, himself, was hurting. He accepted that, but he couldn’t accept that that mattered, so he had buried his own complicated feelings so deep that he wasn’t even sure what he felt anymore. As he stared at the envelope in his hands, however, his stomach coiled and twisted with the sickening, sinking feeling that as soon as he opened that letter, he wouldn’t be able to run from it anymore.

“Do you…uh…want me to read this now?” Hero stumbled with a crack in his voice. He tried not to sigh too loudly in relief as Basil shook his head.

“It’s kind of long… You should probably read it when you get home. Or uh…”—his voice hitched—“you don’t have to read it at all, if you…”

As Basil’s voice tapered off, Hero reached out to gently pat his twisting hands. “No, um…I will. I’ll try to read it tonight. Thank you.”

“I have letters for Kel and Aubrey too, but I’ll see them when I get to come home so…” Basil’s voice trailed, but Hero nodded.

“I’m really glad that you’re going to get to come home soon, Basil. I’m sure Aubrey and Kel will look after you, but I’m always here too. If you need anything, just call” He reached for a nearby pad of paper and a pen, which Aubrey had been using to keep score during their card game and wrote down his phone number “This is my phone number at college. Feel free to call me anytime.”

As he handed the piece of paper to Basil, Basil smiled and muttered a quiet but grateful, “Thank you.”

Hero sighed. From the look on Basil’s face, he knew that Basil was never going to call him. If Hero had to guess, Basil was probably thinking that as soon as Hero read whatever he had written in that letter, he would regret giving him his phone number and would never want to speak to him again. Hero wished there was a way to reassure Basil that this wasn’t the case, that there was nothing that Basil could possibly say that would ever make Hero abandon him, especially when he needed him most. But as it was now, Hero just didn’t have the words…so he hugged Basil goodbye, wished him well and headed back home to Faraway Town, where he spent the rest of the evening staring at that thick envelope wondering when he would ever have the strength to open it.

When the clock at the bottom of the stairs chimed 8:00 PM, Hero, finally, tentatively reached towards the letter. He held his breath—biting his lip as he carefully opened the seal with trembling hands, bracing himself for whatever might be inside. He pulled out a dense stack of notebook paper which he slowly unfolded counting not two or three but ten pages filled with small, delicate script on both the front and back sides. Thankfully, the pages were numbered.

Hero swallowed hard and staring down at the paper in front of him, began to read.

Dear Hero,

This is the fourth time I have tried to write this letter. My doctor suggested that it would be good for me to be honest with you about my regrets to try to make amends and move forward. I don’t think I’ve been doing a very good job of that, and I’m really sorry if I, or this letter, am a burden to you.

I want to start by saying that I have always looked up to and admired you. I’m sure you know that my family wasn’t ever really around. For a long time, it was just me and my grandma. I never had any brothers or sisters, but I had you and the rest of our friends. You were all like a family to me, especially you, Hero. If I ever had a big brother, I imagine he would be a lot like you—always looking out for me.

You are one of the kindest people I have ever met in my whole life. You always think of everyone else before yourself and try to take care of everybody. Even now, when I know that you’re really hurting, you’ve still come to visit me. You still talk to me and take care of my garden. That really means a lot to me, more than I have the words to say, but I want you to know it’s okay if you’re angry with me. I know I would be. I really hurt you—hurt everybody with what I did, and I am so, so sorry.

I know there’s nothing I can say or do to make amends for what I’ve done, and I’m not writing you this letter to make any justifications or excuses. I only want you to know that you mean so much to me—that my whole life all I ever wanted was to be like you. I never meant to hurt you and knowing that what I did hurt you in ways that I can’t even imagine breaks my heart. But what hurts even more is knowing that even now, even after everything I did, you’re still trying to protect me like you always have.

But you don’t have to do that anymore, Hero. If after you read this letter, you never want to forgive me and never want to talk to me again, I completely understand. There are certain things that can’t be fixed with apologies and regrets. I have a lot of regrets—one of the biggest is hurting the one person in the world I knew would always be there for me. I am so, so sorry…

Hero’s breath got caught in his throat. His eyes burned. He couldn’t read anymore.

“I’m going on a run,” he choked out—frantically reaching for his running shoes. Kel looked up from the video game he had been playing with a confused tilt of his head.

“You’d better bring a jacket. It’s cold out there. I heard on the radio that there’s supposed to be a cold snap tonight.”

Hero nodded, but he couldn’t say Kel’s words really registered with him until he was running against the chilly wind. He wished he had listened to his brother and grabbed his jacket, but at the time he had just been so desperate to get out of there—or, he supposed, more accurately to get away from that letter. There was perhaps something poetic in literally running away from it, but Hero hadn’t really been thinking of that at the time. His jogs were his one lifeline—sometimes the only thing that kept him sane, kept him together when he was about to fall apart. It seemed like the only thing he could cling to now.

As Hero turned the corner out onto the main street again, a cold gust of wind blew past. He shivered. It was far too cold for this time of year. Cold snaps weren’t particularly common in Faraway Town, but they generally happened in the spring rather than the fall, at least as far as Hero could remember. He couldn’t recall a lot of cold snaps. As much as it pained him to admit it, a lot of his memories from before Mari had passed away were becoming hazier and hazier, but he could remember a particularly nasty cold snap from about five years ago…

*-*-*

“And watch out for that unexpected cold front,” said the disc jockey on the radio. “Temperatures will drop to the low 30s and below tonight, so you’ll want to get your coats and sweaters back out for the morning.”

“So much for that spring weather…” huffed Aubrey shaking her head as she stared at her hand of cards. “Also, go fish.” 

Kel groaned seemingly upset about both the upcoming cold snap and the fact he was losing at cards. “I don’t even know where my coat is.” 

“I’ll help you look for it,” said Hero patting his brother on the arm. “I think I just saw it hanging up in the closet.”

As Kel just shrugged and reached to draw some cards from the pile in the middle of the table, Hero felt a hand tugging at his shirt sleeve. Sunny blinked at him then motioned to his coat in the corner where he had left it weeks earlier, back when the weather had finally started warming up.

“That’s very nice, Sunny, but you don’t have to loan Kel your coat. He has one at home, and you’ll need it yourself tomorrow.”

Sunny nodded though his eyes widened in surprise as Mari snuck up behind him wearing his coat and wrapped her arms around him. She giggled as she playfully waved the sleeves around, and Hero stifled a laugh as she teased, “This coat is a little heavier than usual, isn’t it?” 

A slight smile tugged at the corners of Sunny’s mouth, and he let out two quick, heavy breaths—which Hero knew meant he was laughing. Seemingly pleased with herself, Mari’s smile widened, and she ruffled her brother’s hair before slipping out of the coat and handing it to him.

“I already boxed up my coat,” said Basil, nervously twisting his hands. “I think it’s under my bed. I’ll have to go home and check.”

Hero tilted his head at him. Somehow Basil seemed more nervous than usual. Mari seemed to notice as well as her face softened, and she gave him a reassuring smile.

“How about I walk you home?” she suggested. “So I can help you look for your coat.”

“Thank you, but you don’t have to do that, Mari,” sniffled Basil. “I’m sure it’ll be okay.”

“I don’t mind at all. It’ll be easier to look for it with several people helping.”

“I can help too,” said Hero. “After I walk Aubrey home, I’ll stop by and help you look for your coat.”

Basil’s eyes widened, and he held up his hands. “Oh no. You don’t have to do that. It’s really not a big deal at all.”

“And you don’t have to walk me home either,” huffed Aubrey with a slight frown. “I just live a street away.”

“But it’s dark out. I just want to make sure you get home safely.”

Aubrey rolled her eyes, but her mouth twitched in the corners as she shrugged her shoulders. “Alright, fine, but we should probably get going, huh? It’s getting late.”

As they all started to say their goodbyes for the evening, Hero watched as Mari gave him a reassuring smile and a look that said, “Don’t worry. I’ll find out what’s bothering, Basil.”

Hero sighed. Of course she had noticed there was something bothering him beyond just his lost coat. Mari was so good at reading people. She always knew when something was wrong and what to do to make someone happy again. It meant a lot to Hero to know that Basil was in such good hands—though he was sure he would feel a lot better once Aubrey was home safely and Mari had helped Basil work through whatever was troubling him.

After dropping Aubrey off at her house, Hero headed to Basil’s house where he was surprised to see Mari and Basil, who was now wearing his winter coat, out in the yard.

“Basil is worried that his plants will get too cold overnight so we’re going to cover them with some tarps and old picnic blankets,” Mari explained. How she had managed to get Basil to tell her this in such a short amount of time amazed Hero, but he supposed that was just Mari’s way with people. He always admired that about her.

Hero reached for one of the tarps and covered a nearby flowerbed. The cold wind biting at them, loosening the coverings as soon as they had been placed, made the task more difficult than it needed to be, but eventually every flowerbed in Basil’s garden was properly covered, warm enough to survive the cold night.

As the three of them surveyed their work, Basil sniffled. “Thank you so much for helping me. You really didn’t have to do that, but it means a lot.”

Hero smiled as Mari threw her arms around Basil and hugged him tightly.

“It was no trouble, Basil,” she said. “We’re always happy to help. That’s what family’s for.”

Tears pooled in Basil’s eyes as he choked out, “Family?”

“Of course. You’re like our little brother.” Giggling, Mari beamed at him and gently ruffled her hand through his hair. “If you ever need anything, we’ll always be here to help you—no matter what.”

Hero nodded in agreement and patted Basil’s shoulder before giving him a hug himself. Wiping the tears from his eyes, Basil sniffled again before saying his final thanks and goodbyes and heading back into his house.

As Hero and Mari started to walk home, Mari reached for Hero’s hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. Hero smiled at her, but watching her shiver in the wind, he immediately let go of her hand and tried to disentangle himself from his jacket.

“Here, you can take this…” he said holding out his coat to her.

Chuckling, Mari wrapped the jacket around her shoulders and playfully teased, “What a gentleman! Thank you.” She took his hand again—intertwining their fingers. “You’re always so sweet, Hero.”

Hero blushed. He watched his feet shuffling on the sidewalk as his face grew warm. “You’re sweeter,” he gently insisted. “What you said to Basil back there was so kind. I could tell it really meant a lot to him.”

Mari’s expression softened, and something bittersweet passed over her eyes. “I feel so sorry for Basil. It’s just him and his grandma. He must be so lonely…and he’s such a gentle-hearted person. I…” She paused. “I worry about him sometimes. He needs somebody to look out for him.”  

Hero nodded solemnly, but he gave Mari’s hand a reassuring squeeze.

“Hero?” As Mari looked up with him with wide, kind eyes, Hero’s heart could have melted. A smile twitched in the corners of her mouth as she quietly continued, “Promise me…that we’ll always take care of Basil…?”

As Hero nodded, a bright smile once again spread across Mari’s face. “Of course, Mari. We’ll always take care of Basil…and his flowers too.”

*-*-*

Hero stopped. Basil’s flowers. What if it got too cold for them and they froze before Basil even got to come home and see them?

Rubbing his hands together for warmth, he took off running towards Basil’s house where he found Polly out in the yard putting tarps over some of Basil’s flowerbeds.

“Hi Polly. Can I help?” asked Hero with a slight smile. “I was out on a run when I remembered Basil’s flowers and…with this cold snap coming in…” His voice trailed, but Polly smiled.

“Oh that’s so sweet of you, Hero,” she replied. “I’m just about finished, but if you want to cover that flowerbed over there”—she paused, motioning to her left—“that would be a big help.”

Hero nodded, and he reached for a nearby tarp. His brow furrowed as he turned towards the flowerbed—his chest aching at the sight of the clusters of lilies. Lilies had been Mari’s favorite flower, and Basil had always used to say they reminded him of her. When they were kids, Basil had had flowers that reminded him of all of his friends. If Hero was remembering correctly, his flower had been roses—though he had never felt he deserved it.  

Hero’s eyes narrowed, and he tilted his head. There were rose bushes in this flowerbed too. When had Basil planted these?

“This is one of Basil’s favorite flowerbeds, you know?” Polly said quietly. “When I first came to work here, I once found him curled up in it in the middle of the night during a cold snap like this. He had covered the plants but was worried they still weren’t going to be warm enough, so he took the blanket off of his bed and dragged it out here and curled up next to them himself.”

Polly sighed. “When I tried to tell him that they were probably warm enough now and he could come back inside, he wouldn’t. He said he planted these flowers for his big brother and sister, and he wasn’t going to leave them. I was so confused because Basil is an only child, but…after everything that happened this summer…I started thinking…”

Polly stopped and turned to look at Hero. She didn’t say anything more, but she didn’t have to—Hero knew what she was thinking. He was thinking the same thing.

With a heavy sigh, he sunk to the ground. Something coiled and twisted in his chest as he thought about what these last four years must have been like for Basil. Not only was he grieving the loss of Mari, blaming himself for her death and everything that had come after, but he was grieving the loss of his family too, worrying that as soon as they knew the truth, they would see him as he saw himself: unredeemable, unforgivable, and unlovable. Hero could picture him shivering in the garden, desperately clinging to his few remaining memories of the only family he had ever known—waiting for the other shoe to drop, for them to learn the truth and leave him behind forever.

As Hero stared at the flowerbed, the carefully tended roses and lilies that had always reminded Basil of him and Mari, Hero’s eyes burned and his vision grew blurred and misty. He could hear Mari’s words, “Promise me…that we’ll always take care of Basil…?”

Hero watched as Polly’s eyes widened in concern. As she leaned forward with an outstretched hand, his brow furrowed. He reached up and touched his cheek—cold from the chilly wind and damp from the tears that had finally struggled free.

*-*-*

“H—Hero?” stammered Basil in surprise as he walked into the hospital’s common area.

Hero gave him a slight smile. “Hey, Basil. How’s it going?”

“I…I thought you were going back to school.”

“Yeah…I…I leave Thursday, but I…” He paused—twisting his hands around the handles of the gift bag he had brought with him. “I wanted to see you one more time. I hope that’s okay…?”

As Hero’s voice trailed, Basil blinked at him with wide eyes, but he managed a brisk nod.

“I brought this for you,” Hero continued, handing Basil the bag. “They’re from your garden.”

Basil pulled out a jar filled with roses and lilies that Hero had carefully picked from his garden with Polly’s permission of course. Hero stared down at his hands and took a deep breath. “Polly told me that flowerbed was one of your favorites. It’s still in bloom and really pretty. I hope you’ll make it home in time to see it before the Fall.”

Basil nodded again but sniffled. “You…you didn’t have to do this. And you didn’t have to come either. I…I know you’re really busy.”

“I always have time for you,” said Hero with a smile. “And after I read your letter, I just…I wanted to come see you because…there’s…something really important that I have to tell you.” He swallowed hard with a slight shrug of his shoulders. “I tried writing it down, but I just couldn’t find the right words and I—”

“It’s okay,” Basil quietly interrupted him with a wavering voice. “You can…say whatever you need to say. I’m ready.”

“No. Uh…um…Basil…I—” Hero stopped abruptly. As he watched Basil tremble, watched the tears pooling in his eyes as he braced himself for the worst, his heart ached. He completely forgot all the words of reassurance he had planned to say and practically leapt forward, wrapping his arms around Basil and holding him tightly. He could feel Basil’s shoulders stiffen—could feel him gasp in surprise.

“He—Hero?” choked Basil—his voice cut off by a strangled, garbled sob in the back of his throat. As he started to shake, Hero knew he was crying, and it broke his heart but not as much as his whispered, “I’m so sorry…”  

Hero pressed his chin to Basil’s shoulder as tears began to prickle in his own eyes. He hugged him tighter—hoping that simple gesture would say everything he didn’t have the words to until finally, at long last, he took a deep breath and said, “I forgive you.”

“What?”

“I forgive you, Basil,” Hero repeated in a trembling voice—taking a deep breath to brace himself for the next part, the hardest part, of what he knew he had to say. “I…what happened…it…it hurt me.” He paused—suddenly struck by the weight of those words and of finally saying them aloud. “But…but that doesn’t make you unforgiveable and that…that doesn’t mean I don’t care about you anymore. I forgive you, and I know it’s probably not my place to say this but…I think…Mari would forgive you too and…she’d want you to forgive yourself. It’s…it’s what I want too.”

Hero’s throat grew dry and burned, but he took a long, shaky breath and continued, “You’ve suffered enough, Basil—punished yourself enough. I know you think that’s what you deserve, but that’s not what Mari would want for you. She really loved you, and all she ever wanted was to take care of you. Beating yourself up about what happened, only hurts you…It’s not going to bring her back. I…I”—his voice hitched— “I know that better than anyone. Believe me…if it did, she’d be here.”

Hero stopped—a lump forming in the back of his throat as his eyes burned with tears. “Mari—Mari isn’t…here…anymore…” he stumbled over his words, until finally he pulled away from Basil, placed both hands on his shoulders and met his teary eyes. “But I am, and I will always be here for you.”

At these words, tears began to pour down Basil’s cheeks as if he had never needed to hear something more in his entire life. He threw his arms around Hero and broke down sobbing. Hero’s face softened, and he pulled Basil close. As he gently patted his back, as he often did whenever he comforted any of his siblings, he caught sight of the jar of flowers on the table: the much loved lilies and roses. Hero sniffled, wiping a tear from his eye, as he thought of Mari and her wish: “Promise me…that we’ll always take care of Basil…?”

“I will always take care of you,” Hero gently whispered. “For both of us…”

#omori hero #hero omori #basil omori #omori basil #hero and basil friendship #hero needs a hug #poor hero 🥺 we only want good things for him #hero deserves to be happy #omori spoilers #hero friendships #when sun shines again⛅ #hero fic #our content #thanks for reading

[acacia-may]

Am I Ready For Love? Or Maybe Just A Best Friend (HERO-Centric OMORI fanfiction)

Description: While playing "Mom Friend" to his college buddies' shenanigans, Hero is shocked to learn that he is widely considered the "Prince" of their campus. Though flattered, he doesn't feel he deserves the praise, especially seeing as his heart still missed the best friend and childhood love he had lost far too soon. He would always miss her and simply couldn't imagine being with anyone else...but that didn't mean he wasn't lonely. Even self-imposed loneliness wasn't free from sadness. When an unexpected conversation drudges up bittersweet memories for him, however, Hero begins to wonder if he doesn't have to be nearly as lonely anymore. He might not be ready for love, but a best friend didn't sound too bad...

Relationships: Hero & Brandi [Intimidating Girl] Friendship, Hero & Original Characters Friendship, Past Romantic Hero/Mari, Romantic Brandi/OC, Could be Hero/OC if you really wanted to see it/imagine it happening after the slowest of slow burns, but this is more about their platonic friendship and is very heavy on the past Hero/Mari angst. Mentioned Hero & Kel and Brandi & Bebe's sibling relationships and Bebe/Mikhael.

Characters: Hero (POV Character), Brandi [Intimidating Girl], Original Characters, Mari's Memory, Mentioned Kel, Bebe (Short Haired Girl/Fountain Girl) & Mikhael (The Maverick).

Genre: Hero-Centric Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Slice of Life, College Life, Lost Love, Developing Friendship, Developing Relationship, Greiving, Catharsis, Heart-To-Heart Chats, Hopeful Ending, Post-Good Ending, Hero Needs A Hug, Hero Deserves To Be Happy

Word Count: 7,779

Rating: T for some heavy themes and thematic elements (i.e. grief & healing from grief and trauma. Implied/Referenced Canonical Character Death & Implied/Referenced Mental Health Issues including depression & suicide. Mentions of Underage Drinking & Partying) Some language.

Warnings: Major Spoilers for OMORI! Heavy themes and thematic elements (i.e. grief & healing from grief and trauma. Implied/Referenced Canonical Character Death & Implied/Referenced Mental Health Issues including depression & suicide. Mentions of Underage Drinking & Partying). Some Language.

Link to original post on AO3. Please do not repost to another website. All other interaction (likes, reblogs ect.) appreciated!

A/N: This story (including it's title) was heavily inspired by the song "Turning Out" by AJR (which is just a shot to the heart when thinking of poor Hero 🥺❤️ Highly recommend), and this "Hero's Life After Mari" Universe was co-created by @randomsprinkles. Full story text below the cut.

Thank you so much for reading and cheers to good & happy things for Hero in the future! 💕

“You know, sometimes I think Kel is fine, but then yesterday he called to tell me he ate a whole can of spray cheese”—Hero sighed and shook his head—"nothing with it just the spray cheese…” He shrugged his shoulders, and Brandi laughed. Swapping stories about their siblings was one of their favorite activities—especially at these wilder college parties where they tended to gravitate towards each other in want of a familiar face and company that wasn’t completely wasted. Even though Faraway Town was small, and he had known Brandi nearly his entire life, they hadn’t really become friends until college and the hours they spent together reminiscing about home or making each other laugh with stories about Bebe’s hopeless lovesickness or Kel’s well-meaning but often silly antics. It was a relief to have a friend and a familiar face around, and Hero could never quite tell her how much that meant to him.

“Well, that’s nothing. Bebe is still lovesick over that moron who wears that ridiculous wig and calls himself ‘The Maverick,’” huffed Brandi. “How many times do you think he’s seen Top Gun? I’m guessing at least fifty, possibly a hundred.” As Hero stifled a chuckle, Brandi rolled her eyes as she leaned her elbows on the kitchen counter and poured herself another glass of something, Hero wasn’t entirely sure what and he didn’t ask. He had learned it was better not to.

“Well…his family does run the best bakery in Faraway Town, and—” Hero stopped. He was going to mention how Aubrey had been good friends with Mikhael for quite a while, but then he realized she probably had even less positive things to say about him than Brandi did. 

“I guess, but that’s just his family, and even if they’re great, he’s just…”—she paused as if searching for the right word—“a bozo. I just can’t believe she’d throw away her future for some guy like that. She says she wants to go to pastry school now so she can work in the bakery. She doesn’t even bake! You just wait until Kel starts dating,” she warned with a heavy sigh. “He’ll be driving you up the wall.”

With a shrug of his shoulders, Hero chuckled. Truthfully, he was a little surprised that hadn’t happened yet, but Kel didn’t seem particularly interested in a romantic relationship right now, which Hero could respect. He certainly felt the same way himself, though for different reasons, but he quickly pushed those thoughts away and buried them, changing the subject. “Speaking of dating, how are things going with you and C.J.?”

Brandi’s mouth twitched into a slight smile. “Checking up on your handiwork, matchmaker?” she teased dryly.

Hero’s face felt a bit flushed. That hadn’t been his intention, but he fidgeted.  “Are you upset that I set you up?”

“You didn’t set us up. You just…talked him up to me until I finally agreed to go out with him, there’s a difference,” Brandi insisted, and Hero chuckled. He supposed that was true. C.J. was one of Hero’s friends from his fraternity, and he had had the most obvious yet sincere interest in Brandi ever since they were paired up for a legal research course project. Hero had thought they had a lot in common—spirited personalities, strong sense of justice, same Pre-Law major and aspirations to become attorneys someday, and, though he usually tried to stay out of his friends’ business especially their love lives, C.J. had begged him to put in a good word for him so she wouldn’t see him as just another dumb, partying frat boy.

Hero couldn’t blame Brandi for her trepidation around fraternity guys. They didn’t have the best reputation, and if Hero was being honest, he likely would have tried to avoid them himself if he hadn’t been forcibly dragged…er…recruited into a fraternity last pledge term. He would say it was a long story, but it really wasn’t. They needed someone to cook and to clean around their garbage heap of a frat house—a “Mama,” as they quickly deemed him—and Hero was too polite and conflict-avoidant to refuse when Kyle, a sports medicine major in his organic chemistry class, practically begged him to pledge for his frat. His harrowing tale of how they had eaten practically nothing but instant ramen every day for the past year was really the final straw. Now he cooked not only for the fraternity but also for all their guests when they had parties since keeping everyone fed and hydrated with water when they were binge drinking resulted in less vomiting on the carpet and less passing out on the living room rug or in the yard.

That was what he was doing now, after all, making sandwiches on the stove, handing out glasses of water, and keeping an eye on the dwindling bottles of booze. He handed Brandi the grilled cheese he had been making for her with a smile, and Brandi hummed. “Thank you. And thank you for setting me up too, I guess. It’s nice not to be hit on all the time anymore. It was getting pretty annoying.” She laughed, playing with the red glow stick bracelet on her wrist, and Hero chuckled in spite of himself before she quickly added, “I’m really just teasing. C.J.’s a great guy, and we are very happy, so I really do owe you one.”

Hero smiled and shrugged his shoulders. He was glad to help, and it was honestly really nice having Brandi around more often. She cleaned up after herself at least.

“If you ever want me to return the favor, just let me know. I know a ton of girls who would kill to go out with you.”—she laughed as Hero blushed—“I’m pretty sure you’re like the prince of our campus.”

Hero’s face burned. He was sure it must be bright red by now. It wasn’t the first time he had heard that, and it probably wouldn’t be the last, but he never could take a good compliment, even a joking one. “I’m sure that’s not…” he mumbled, but his voice trailed off as he grew suddenly interested in the spatula in his hands. He shook his head and ignored the heat in his cheeks as he changed directions. “Thank you…that’s very flattering, but um…I’m just…I’m not…It’s…” He began to trip over his words, unsure of what exactly he wanted to say, but Brandi thankfully cut him off with a tilt of her head and a knowing, sympathetic smile.

“It’s complicated?” She finished for him, pointing at the yellow glow stick on his wrist. He always picked ‘It’s Complicated’ yellow for these kinds of traffic light parties. It was just the easiest—saved him from the awkwardness of being flirted with and having to turn people down while also not lying that he was in a relationship already.

Hero nodded, and Brandi patted his hand with a soft, bittersweet expression and a knowing smile. She leaned closer to him so no one would hear her whisper, “Your heart’s still with her, isn’t it?”

Something panged in that all too familiar ache in Hero’s chest. He supposed that was one way of putting it. It wasn’t something he ever really talked about, but he supposed it was no secret that he had not had a relationship with anyone since Mari. The truth was, even if he had wanted one—even if he could move on from her, he didn’t think it would be fair—not to Mari’s memory or to whoever he could be with. He had already had a beautiful love story and, even though it was cut short, he felt that to even wish for anything more would be greedy and ungrateful for the time that he and Mari did have together. That said, doubt occasionally set in that that was a bit of an unreasonable notion all things considered—he had been only fifteen when she had passed and had his whole life ahead of him. In the deepest corners of his mind, he knew she would probably want him to move on and be happy again, but at the same time even if he could someday be ready to open up his heart again, he worried that he would never be able to give that other person the love she deserved. He would never be able to say that she was the one and only love of his life and would never be able to tell her that he had never felt this way about anyone. He would always miss Mari, and, now, the only heart he had to give had already been broken and painfully pieced back together. It was so busted and bruised that, if he was being perfectly honest, he had trouble believing that anyone would even want it.

“Hero…”

“It’s okay,” he cut her off with a slight, reassuring smile, and Brandi smiled back. “I’m okay.”

Brandi nodded. “I understand,” she said with a sigh before taking a sip of her drink. “But if you ever change your mind…if you’re ever ready…you know where to find me, and I know where to find a ton of girls who would definitely be interested.” She winked at him, and he playfully rolled his eyes though he scratched the back of his neck when he felt an arm drape around his shoulders.

“What’s going on?” exclaimed Kyle, his voice already starting to slur from too much liquor.

“Brandi’s trying to set me up,” sighed Hero in a dry, somewhat joking way.

Kyle burst into raucous laughter. “Good luck with that. We’ve been trying too—since I’m pretty sure there’s not a girl on this campus who wouldn’t date our very own ‘Prince Charming,’ here, but he’s practicing to be a monk or something.”

“Well, you know, Kyle, it is possible not to have a relationship—it won’t kill you,” bantered Brandi with a frown.

“Ha. Ha. Very funny.” Kyle stuck his tongue out at her. “I know you think I’m a serial optometrist.”

“Monogamist,” corrected Brandi, as Hero covered his mouth with his hand and tried not to laugh. “How drunk are you?”

Kyle hummed, kind of teetering in place. “I dunno.” He turned to Hero. “Mama, how drunk am I?”

Hero sighed, reaching to pour Kyle what was clearly a much needed glass of water. “Here,” he said, avoiding the question. “Drink this. You’ll feel better.”

Kyle nodded and gulped down the water. Hero must have refilled his glass at least twice more, before Kyle leaned his elbows on the counter and asked for a BLT which Hero promptly went to work making. “Thanks. Look, I love my relationships. I just don’t want my friends missing out, you know? And hell, if I was that popular, I’d probably be taking full advantage of it—most guys would. Mama here is an actual saint.”

Hero’s face flushed red, but before he could begin to protest, Brandi interjected with a huffy, “I’m sure you would Kyle” conveniently ignoring his comments about Hero’s supposed sainthood. Her brow furrowed—her eyes narrowing at the green glow stick bracelet on Kyle’s wrist. “I see you’re on the market again. What happened to Tiffany?”

“Eh, didn’t work out,” shrugged Kyle. “We were too different.”

“Realized you didn’t have anything in common besides your love of sucking face?” quipped Brandi sarcastically. Kyle rolled his eyes.

“No,” he insisted, but then sighed. “Alright…sort of…but there were more problems than that.” He sighed. “You know…never mind. I didn’t come over here to talk about Tiffany.” He waved his hand dismissively before his face lit up like a little kid on Christmas. “I wanted to tell you guys, there’s this whole group of girls hanging out in the living room, and they think I look like Nick Carter.”

“How drunk are they?” scoffed Brandi.

Kyle rolled his eyes. “Oh come on, I’ve always thought I looked like him. You think so, don’t you, Hero?”

Hero tilted his head. He supposed he could kind of see it. They had similarly shaped noses, heart-shaped faces, pale skin, light eyes, and blonde hair; however, the trait they had most in common was that curtain bangs haircut, and Hero was fairly certain Kyle had purposely styled his hair that way just to look like he could be in a boy band. Even so, he shrugged and said, “Yeah. You’re practically the sixth Backstreet Boy.”

“See,” he turned to Brandi with a triumphant huff, almost like the satisfied taunt a young boy might give his little sister. Hero chuckled lightly to himself. It reminded him a bit of Kel.

“That doesn’t mean anything,” Brandi insisted. “Hero would say anything just to be nice.”

Hero’s face flushed. He hoped he wouldn’t get pulled back into this argument, but luckily Kyle didn’t seem to hear her, instead insisting, “And here I was going to say I think you look like Celine Dion, but now that you’ve been so rude to me, I don’t think I’ll say anything.”

“I don’t look like Celine Dion, Kyle.” Brandi shook her head before taking a sip of her drink.

“Aw, I think you kinda look like Celine Dion, babe,” C.J. interjected draping an arm around his girlfriend.

“Thanks, but I really don’t…” Brandi sighed, but C.J. cut her off.

“And I always thought I kinda look like Usher but with glasses.”

“Not you too…” she teased though there was a certain affection in her eyes and a twitch in the corners of her mouth. “What is it with guys comparing themselves to celebrities? I honestly thought that was just a girl thing.”

C.J. pouted playfully. “What? You don’t think I look like Usher?”

Once again, Hero could kind of see the similarities—oval shaped faces, wide cheekbones, warm eyes, dark skin, and bright, beaming smiles. They looked about as much alike as Kyle and Nick Carter though he wasn’t sure that was saying much, especially coming from him. Brandi, it seemed, was unconvinced.

“I think you look like C.J.” she said quirking an eyebrow at him.

“I’m not sure I know that celebrity,” he teased wrapping his arms around her neck. “Is he handsome?”

Brandi stifled a chuckle but playfully, pretended to ponder the question before finally meeting his gaze. “Yes.”

C.J.’s face lit up into that beaming, 100-watt smile as he looked into her eyes. Hero recognized that look, like Brandi was the only one in the room and they were lost in their own little corner of the world. She ruffled her hand through his tight curls, and he leaned in and kissed her.

“Get a room you two,” teased Kyle sticking his tongue out at them. With a flick of his finger, C.J. promptly told Kyle exactly what he thought of his comments before he cupped Brandi’s face in his hands.

With a bantering shake of his head, Kyle stared down at his green glow stick bracelet like it was watch. Hero turned away abruptly, his face feeling warm as if he had intruded on what should be a very private moment.

Truthfully, despite the awkwardness he currently felt at their extremely public display of affection, he really was happy for them—for all of his friends who wanted relationships and had found them. If he was being honest with himself, however, it did bring up some complicated feelings for him sometimes—made him feel lonely. It was a self-imposed loneliness, but that didn’t mean it was always free from sadness. He glanced down at the yellow glow stick on his wrist. The truth was it wasn’t all that complicated. Even after all these years, he still missed Mari, and he knew he would always miss her. It wouldn’t be fair to pursue anyone else while he felt this way—to put his new love in a situation where she’d feel like a second choice or a last resort, so he contented himself with being alone, probably forever. A bittersweet smile tugged at his mouth. Maybe he’d get a cat… he thought before turning his focus to making Kyle’s sandwich.  

As he added the finishing touches to Kyle’s BLT, Brandi finally disentangled herself from her boyfriend. “We’re making Kyle and Hero uncomfortable,” she said, but C.J. shrugged, draping an arm around her shoulders.

“Eh, they’re just jealous.” He stuck out his tongue at Kyle, who stuck his tongue out back. Hero sighed. It was very juvenile, but he still chuckled in spite of himself.

“Hey! I’m glad I’m not tied down,” Kyle insisted with a dismissive wave of his hand as he took a bite out of the sandwich Hero gave him.

Brandi frowned. “Tell me, Kyle. Have you ever had a relationship with a woman that lasted more than two weeks?”

“Yes!” He nodded emphatically. “With Zuzu.” He paused then called as loudly as he could out onto the patio. “Hey, Zuzu! Come tell these morons how long we’ve been friends.”

A redheaded girl in an oversized sweater whipped around with a somewhat affectionate if bantering roll of her green eyes. “Too long,” she quipped, wrinkling her lightly freckled nose at them, as she walked through the sliding door back into the kitchen.

“You wound me, Zuzu,” Kyle gasped in teasing melodrama, clutching his chest. “What were you doing outside anyway? Aren’t you usually glued to Mama at these things?”

“Because he’s the only sober person here,” she teased, but she smiled at him.  Hero’s face flushed. It was true that Zuzu, or Zoey as she was called by everyone who wasn’t Kyle, was generally his ‘partner in crime’ at all parties hosted by his fraternity or her sorority—spending the night helping him in the kitchen or passing out cups of water to the groups of plastered college students mingling around the house, and often helping with cleanup and dishes afterwards. Truthfully, he enjoyed her company and the conversations they had—talking and laughing for hours while making food, cleaning up or doing dishes together. Though he always felt guilty about putting a guest to work at his party, she always insisted she had a much better time spending the evening with a friend than she would have getting drunk and partying. A smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. He felt the same way. 

“Like you haven’t had a thing to drink,” retorted Kyle, wrapping an arm around her shoulder and staring down into her cup. Zoey merely blinked at him.

“I haven’t. I have a thermodynamics exam on Monday and need to study tomorrow.” She always blamed her aversion to drinking on her difficult civil engineering major, but Hero knew she just didn’t care for drunk partying. Now that Hero was thinking about it, Zoey blamed a lot of things on her difficult civil engineering major—not least of all the red glow stick on her wrist despite being contentedly single. “Married to school,” she always joked, and Hero often joked the same thing.

“But that’s tomorrow,” Kyle whined.“You and Mama are both such old people.” He stuck his tongue out at them, but Zoey just shrugged with a lopsided smile.

“Old people have more fun. You’ll understand someday, Kyle.”

Hero stifled a chuckle behind his hand, before turning his attention back to the stove.

“Brandi and C.J., back me up here,” Kyle sighed, but when he turned around he realized they had gone, probably to continue their PDA somewhere a little more private, if Hero had to guess, but he didn’t really want to think about it. Kyle huffed. “Whatever. Be boring old grandparents together, I don’t care. You’re the ones missing out.” He grabbed his cup, a beer, and the rest of his sandwich, leaving them in the kitchen alone.

“Don’t mind Kyle,” said Zoey with a shake of her head. “He can be such a moron sometimes, but he’s a nice guy, even if he acts like a kid especially when he’s drunk…But I’m sure I don’t need to tell you that.”

A slight smile tugged at Hero’s mouth. He had been roommates with Kyle for over a year now, and he could definitely attest to that.

“We’ve already hit ‘Touchy-Feely Drunk Kyle’”—Zoey tilted her head at him—“How hungover do you think he’ll be tomorrow?”

Hero quickly stifled a breathy chuckle, but he sighed. “I don’t know. He always thinks he can drink a lot more than he can handle.”

Zoey’s mouth twitched into a dry smile. “I bet you’re an expert on nursing hangovers now. It’s a shame that can’t go on your med school application.”

Hero laughed but immediately felt guilty for it.

“Give him one of those sports drinks with breakfast tomorrow—it’ll help. I keep a ton of them in our fridge back at the sorority house for when the girls go out partying or bar hopping.”

“You really are the mom, huh?” Hero replied dryly, and though Zoey smiled, she raised an eyebrow at him.

“You’re one to talk.”  

Hero shrugged. He supposed she had a point and not just because she was currently holding his “World’s Best Mama” mug with a dry yet triumphant smile.

“Well,” sighed Zoey gathering up some more of the dirty dishes scattered around the kitchen. “Since you’ll probably be pretty busy playing nurse tomorrow, we should probably get started on the clean-up tonight.” She looked around the room with narrowed green eyes. “It looks like a tornado stormed through here.”

With a weary sigh, Hero rubbed his forehead. Unfortunately, she was right. Given the sorry state of the kitchen alone, to say that the party had trashed their place would be a bit of an understatement. It would probably take hours to clean everything up—to say nothing of the several hours of cleaning Hero had already done to prepare for the party in the first place. Hero supposed he could do most of the deep cleaning in the morning when some of his fraternity brothers might be awake to help out, if they weren’t too hungover that is, but, truthfully, he wouldn’t mind cleaning up on his own—after all, he did most of the cleaning around here anyway.

With a sigh, Hero conceded that Zoey was probably right and he might as well start cleaning now. He reached out to take the mug and the rest of the dishes from Zoey and turned on the sink to begin to rinse them out. Hero shook his head. If he had a nickel for every minute he spent doing dishes in this house…

He felt a nudge on his elbow as Zoey joined him, rinsing off some of the plates she had gathered from the table.

“You really don’t have to do that,” he insisted.

“And leave you to clean everything up by yourself?” She paused but not long enough for him to even begin to protest. “I’ve been there—it’s no fun at all.”

“We got our dishwasher fixed,” Hero sighed with a slight shrug of his shoulders.

“Then this won’t take that long,” she continued. “All we’ll have to do is rinse them off.” She pointed a sponge at him with a certain determination in her green eyes that said this sorry excuse for an argument was over, and Hero knew she was right. 

No matter how guilty he may have felt about putting a guest and a friend to work cleaning up his house, he was compliant and conflict avoidant by nature and had no stamina for arguing. She had insisted she wanted to help, and goodness knows he could use an extra set of hands. He would ultimately concede and even though she would insist it was unnecessary, later this week, he’d send her a thank you card with a plate of her favorite cookies or some flowers—or a more thoughtful gift if he could think of one. The last time she had helped him clean up after a party, he had bought her a set of Papa Chip coasters since, while they were doing dishes for hours by hand on account of the then broken dishwasher, they had somehow started talking about how they had both loved Papa Chip back when they were kids.

“And you don’t have to send me any coasters this time,” she teased, and Hero’s cheeks felt suddenly warm, wondering if she could somehow read his mind. “Not that they’re not great,” she added hurriedly. “You’re very thoughtful, but you really don’t have to do that.”

Hero’s face flushed red—he never could take a compliment—but a smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. “I know, but I felt bad and…”

“Well don’t,” she interrupted. “We’re friends, and I don’t mind helping you out. Besides, a bunch of my sorority sisters were giving me dirty looks for about a week until I lied and told everyone they were from Jared. I don’t know if they really bought it or just got over it.”  

Hero’s brow furrowed. He supposed those coaters could be a gift someone’s younger brother would get for them—after all, Kel had gotten him a Papa Chip cookbook “just because,” once—but he wasn’t sure why Zoey had felt the need to lie to the other girls in the sorority house. “I’m sorry if I upset the other girls or made them angry with you.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Zoey shrugged it off with a dismissive wave of her hand. “They’re just jealous that we’re actually friends.” She sighed. “I’ve tried to tell them that you’re actually pretty friendly and nice, so they could be friends with you too if they started treating you like an actual person instead of some kind of ‘Campus Prince.’”—she shook her head—“But I don’t think it’s been working.”

Hero blushed. Though he found it very flattering, he still couldn’t wrap his head around how he could have possibly become some sort of ‘Prince’ of their campus in the minds of so many girls.

“You should tell them I’m kind of a dork…” Hero sighed sheepishly, scratching the back of his neck.

“I tried that too,” she bantered. “But they didn’t believe me.”

Hero laughed, but his smile quickly faded. “I’m sorry. I’ll stop sending you things.”

“Don’t worry about it,” she repeated, a little more forcefully. “They need to get over themselves. I’m honestly kind of sick of the Hero fan club that goes on in our house.”

Hero’s face felt suddenly warm, and he resisted the urge to bury his face in his hands. “Fan club?” he choked.

“Yes. You, Mr. Prince, are always the hot topic of conversation,” she teased with a lopsided smile. “If you asked practically anyone, they’d say you are probably the perfect man—even my sister who has this awful obsession with bad boys thinks so, which is really saying a lot.” She paused, and Hero stifled a chuckle. Zoey’s twin sister, Lorraine, was a sweet and bubbly girl despite her terrible taste in boyfriends, a topic often bemoaned by both Zoey and Kyle. A slight tint of pink flushed in his cheeks, he supposed it really was quite the compliment coming from her. “And it doesn’t help that you’re so mysterious.”

“I don’t think I’m mysterious,” Hero chuckled sheepishly, rubbing his hand across the back of his neck.

“I know, you’re not,” Zoey cut him off with a reassuring smile. “And I’ve tried to explain that to them multiple times, but they don’t really listen to me since they’re convinced I’m trying to steal you away.”

A blush filled his cheeks, and he turned away from her abruptly. “What?”

“You know, the idea of men and women just being friends, is a little beyond them, I think,” she quipped. “It’s ridiculous, but can you blame them? I mean in their minds you’re a real life ‘Prince Charming,’ and even though you’re interested in women and could have pretty much any girl in the universe you wanted, you’re really, really single.” She chuckled, as Hero buried his face in his hands. He could almost picture that bright, cheeky grin on her face, though he wouldn’t—no, couldn’t turn to look at her again. “You’ve got to be hung up on somebody, otherwise why haven’t you chosen from the hoards of adoring women who would kill to be with you?”

Hero’s face grew hot. He was sure it must be bright red by now. “Zoey…”

“It’s a big topic of conversation is all I’m saying.”

Finally, Hero managed to pull his hands away from his face, if only because his eyes were beginning to burn from the soapy dishwater. “Can you please tell them that I’m very flattered,” he stumbled, still blushing furiously. “But I’m just so busy with school that I’m just not…really looking for a relationship right now?”

Zoey shrugged. “Tried and failed, but I’d be happy to tell them again. Don’t expect them to believe me though. At this point, everybody’s making up their own theories.”

“Theories?” Hero choked.

“You know you have your normal ones like you’re too busy for a relationship or you had a bad relationship in the past and just aren’t ready to put yourself back out there again. Then there are the ones that you actually already have a relationship, but you’re very private about it so no one has ever seen or heard of her. There are a couple of wild ones in this category like she’s a celebrity so you have to keep it a secret so the press doesn’t find out and you end up in a tabloid.” She winked at him. “Just like in a movie.”  

“You are making this up.”

Zoey shook her head. “No, I swear I’ve heard that one, and that’s not even the craziest one. I’ve also heard a rumor that you’ve been promised in an arranged marriage since birth so that you can take over as the CEO of a toaster strudel empire. And, of course, my personal favorite: that you have an eccentric billionaire uncle who wants you to inherit his vast fortune but only on the condition that you remain a reclusive bachelor just like him.”  

Hero laughed in spite of himself. “That’s—none of those are true…” He cleared his throat. “Except the first one about me being too busy.”

“I know, and that’s what I always say. Everybody keeps coming to me and asking about it like I have some secret, inside knowledge or something, but I have a theory just like everybody else,” she joked waving her hand dismissively.

“You have a theory?”

Zoey stopped but shrugged. “I mean…not one that I just sit around and think about, but you can only be asked the same question so many times before you start thinking…” Her voice trailed. “It’s not one I ever tell anyone,” she insisted. “If anyone asks me, I always tell them exactly what you just said, which is that you’re flattered but too focused on school and your future to worry about a relationship right now.”

“Then what’s your theory?” he asked half-jokingly, half-actually-interested.

“You really want to know?”

Hero put down the plate he was scrubbing and shrugged. “Kind of.”

Zoey paused, and when she sighed, Hero fidgeted. “But you don’t have to tell me, if you don’t want to,” he hurriedly added.

“No, I…” She stopped though there was the slightest tint of rose in her pale cheeks. “But it’s just a theory. I don’t want to offend you or…”

Hero’s brow furrowed. Offend him? What in the world could she possibly be thinking? His breath caught in his throat. She couldn’t…know…could she?

“I won’t be offended,” he reassured her quietly, but his heart was beginning to pound. “Do you…not believe me? Because it really is true. I’m very busy with school and—”

“No. It’s…it’s not like that,” she cut him off with a sigh as she placed her sponge on the counter. “I really do think that you are very busy with school—studying for your classes and the MCAT and all of that. You just don’t have the time or energy for a relationship right now, but…I don’t think that means you don’t want one.” Zoey paused, her voice growing quiet, and she met his eyes. “I think you do want a relationship—otherwise you wouldn’t be so lonely.”

Hero inhaled sharply—his breath getting caught in his chest. Biting his lip, he looked away from her, staring down at his trembling hands. He wanted to hide—curl in on himself—maybe figure out a way to laugh it off like Kel or Kyle might be able to do, but he was frozen, shocked. Of all the things she could have possibly…? No, that wasn’t the question. The real question gnawing at him was had it really been so obvious?

“Hero?” He could hear the concern in her voice, but he wouldn’t—couldn’t look at her. “Listen, I can just…stop there…”  

“Is there more?” The question slipped out before he could stop it.

Zoey sighed. “Yes, but I feel bad. I can…”

“Go on,” Hero squeaked, barely managing a nod.

Zoey sighed again, and Hero wasn’t sure if she was even going to continue until she finally said, “But…the thing is…you don’t just want a relationship with just anyone. You—you want a relationship with someone you can never be with. And even though you know your love is doomed…”—she paused—“you gave your heart to her a long time ago and you can’t even imagine being with anyone else.”

Something ached in Hero’s chest. Somehow he knew that was what she was going to say, but he had to hear it for himself. He wished he could sink into the floor, could hide from her, from his memories, from himself again. And yet…there was a part of him that didn’t want to.

“Wow…” he barely managed, after a long, heavy silence.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have—”

“No,” he quietly interjected, his voice hitching. “That was…pretty spot on actually…”

“Oh Hero…” Zoey sighed. “I’m sorry…I…”  

“Don’t be.” He fiddled with the sponge in his hands, and after a few intense scrubs at a particularly stubborn stain, he finally added as nonchalantly as he could manage. “I asked, and you were right…”

“I didn’t want to be right about this.”

Hero bit down hard on his lip as something burned behind his eyes. Scratching the nape of his neck, he let out a breathy, self-deprecating chuckle. “I guess I had just hoped that it wasn’t so obvious that I was so sad and pathetic...”

“I don’t think you’re pathetic.”

Truthfully, he hadn’t realized that he had even said those words aloud until she had spoken them back to him.

“And I don’t think it’s obvious—except to your close friends maybe?” She paused, sighing and placing a gentle hand on his arm. “She must have been special and very important to you. I think it’s sweet that you’re still devoted to her and there isn’t anything wrong with that, unless, you know, she’s married or something, in which case…”—she began to quip breathily, probably in an attempt to make him smile again—“but I don’t think you’re the type…”

Hero’s mouth twitched in the corners, but the ghost of his smile faded as he shook his head. “No, she…uh…” The words caught in the back of his throat. “She passed away.”

“Oh Hero, I’m so sorry.” Zoey wrapped her arms around his shoulders and pulled him into a tight hug. He took a deep shaky breath, staring up at the ceiling ignoring that prickling feeling in his eyes. When she pulled away from him, he somehow managed the slightest twitch in the corners of his mouth.

“It’s okay. It was a long time ago…” He wasn’t sure if his weak reassurances were for her or for himself. “I should probably be over it by now.”

As he couldn’t bear to look at her, he could only imagine what her face looked like right now. He shook his head. He didn’t want to think about it. “I’m—I’m sorry,” he spluttered. “I’m sorry for making you sad. I—”

“No,” Zoey cut him off. “You didn’t make me sad. Hero…if you want to talk about it, you can tell me. I’m your friend—I care about you.” She paused, and Hero bit his lip. He could feel her gentle hand running comfortingly across his shoulders. “You’re not going to hurt me. I can take it.”

Hero finally breathed—a long deep exhale of the breath he had been holding for far too long. She had no idea how reassuring those words were. Still…try as he might, he couldn’t bring himself to tell her. He opened his mouth, but the words got garbled in the back of his throat.

“Take your time,” she whispered.

After several deep breaths he finally choked out, “Her name was Mari.” His voice hitched, then the words began to tumble out of his mouth. “She lived next door for as long as I can remember, and I…I always thought she was just the most amazing person. She was smart and funny and very talented—she was wonderful at arts and crafts and gardening and a really gifted pianist. We even used to play together sometimes, and she was so kind and very generous—she was always going out of her way to help someone and make them happy. And when she smiled”—his voice cracked—”You would have thought the sun shined brighter.”

He paused, sniffled. “I think I loved her before I even knew what that was…And I couldn’t believe it when she felt the same way about me.” As a bittersweet smile tugged at his lips, his eyes grew misty. “We were high school sweethearts, until she died.” He swallowed hard—that familiar, hollow pang in his chest ached.

“We were 15. It’s kind of a long story but…at the time, we didn’t know how she died. We thought—I thought—she had ended her own life”—he inhaled sharply, shakily, unable to stop the words even if he wanted to—“It was probably the darkest time of my life. I was a wreck, and I blamed myself. I…I didn’t even know she was depressed. I thought if I had just talked to her—had just held her tighter, just loved her more—better then maybe she…” He stopped. Blinking back the tears in his eyes, he sniffled and cleared his throat. “But it was an accident. There were…witnesses…we found out later. She—she had a bad knee, you see, and…and she fell down the stairs…landed wrong and…” He stopped abruptly. “You—You’d think learning that would make the guilt go away but it…”

Hero swallowed hard, but he managed a shaky sigh. “But…But with time…eventually I just…threw myself into school and work and extra-curriculars. My parents had always wanted me to be a doctor, and all I could see was years of school, years of residency, long hours of studying and clinicals and work and I thought I could just bury myself in it—stay so busy that I wouldn’t feel it anymore, but it doesn’t ever really go away.”

He sniffled and wiped his eyes again with a shaky chuckle. “I know it doesn’t seem like it now, but I…I’m usually pretty okay. It’s been so many years now, and it doesn’t hurt like it used to. But…but sometimes I’ll see a wave of dark hair or hear a name that sounds like hers or someone playing a waltz on a piano or our song on the radio and”—his voice hitched—“I just don’t know if I’m ever really going to be over it.”  

He swallowed hard. “And you’re right. I can’t even imagine being with anyone else. It wouldn’t be fair—to her, to that person, I mean. What if—I couldn’t love her as much? And you know, I think maybe we all get that ‘once in a lifetime’ love in our lives and I’ve already had mine. It would be greedy to even want anything else. But…but mostly I think it’s just that I wanted to be with her forever, and”—there was a hitch in his voice as tears began to pool in his eyes again—“even now, all these years later, I guess I…I just still don’t know what forever looks like without her.”

A tear finally struggled free from his eye and splashed down his cheek, followed by another, then another. Hero frantically swiped at them, but they wouldn’t stop. Zoey’s arms wrapped around his shoulders again, and she pulled him close.

He wasn’t sure how long she held him. How long he listened to the sound of her steady breathing, felt her hand gently tangling in the hair at the base of his neck. How long it was until she whispered, “I wish you had gotten your forever…”

It wasn’t until he felt the tremble of her shoulders, heard the way her voice had hitched over her words that he realized she was also crying.

He pulled away from her and finally looked in her green eyes—warm and teary. Hero swallowed hard. He had never learned what to say to someone who was crying for him. “Please don’t cry.”  

“Sorry,” she said with the twitch of a bittersweet smile. “I’m not sure I can do that.”

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said anything,” he began to ramble. “I just—I…I really should be over it and I just completely dumped all of that on you and I was so…”—he struggled to find the words—“weepy and melodramatic and needy and…”

“No,” she gently cut him off. “You were real. Don’t apologize for that.” She wiped her eyes, and her expression softened. “Hero, what happened was so awful, and the idea of you having to go through something like that, it just—” She stopped. “That’s why I cried. You didn’t hurt me. I told you I can take it, and I’m okay.” She sighed. “And you know for what it’s worth, I think the whole idea of ‘getting over it’ is bullshit. There are some things in our lives that we’ll just never get over. We can get past them, but they’re still going to be there—we just have to learn to build a new life around them, so don’t beat yourself up. You’re still entitled to feel sad. Heck, you’d be entitled to never leave your room again after something like that, but here you are, out living your life, so give yourself a break, okay?” She nodded at him with a slight, reassuring smile before she patted his hand. “And for goodness sakes, stop worrying about me of all people. You don’t have to be the hero all the time. I know it’s your name, but…you don’t have to take it too literally.”  

A light chuckle reverberated in his chest, and a smile twitched in the corners of his mouth. Before he could say anything, however, Kyle burst through the patio door.

“Woah…what’s goin’ on?” He stopped abruptly, and his expression softened. “Are you okay?”

Flushing, Hero swallowed hard nodding and sniffling as he frantically wiped at his eyes. He had completely forgotten himself and couldn’t believe he had just shared what was arguably his biggest, deepest secret in the middle of a house party.

Zoey thankfully jumped to his rescue with a remarkably believable, “We were doing dishes, and poor Hero got some dish soap in his eyes. We’ve been trying to rinse them out, but they got all watery.”

Though it took a few moments, Kyle eventually nodded in understanding. “Oh. That sucks, man,” he said patting him on the back. “Is there anything I can do to help?”

Hero managed a slight smile but shook his head. “No, Kyle. Thanks, but it’s okay. I’m fine.”

Kyle nodded again, but Hero saw him glance over at Zoey as if waiting for additional reassurance or instructions. When she nodded at him, Kyle sighed. “Alright, well if you need anything let me know, okay?”

Hero nodded at him then handed him a glass of water. Kyle took it with a smile then walked off towards the living room. When he was gone, Hero sniffled again and turned back to Zoey, sheepish and embarrassed.

“Zoey, I’m sor—” he began to apologize again, but she cut him off.

“No. None of that, Henry,” she insisted with a pointed emphasis on his real name. He could tell she was trying her best not to smile as she said it, probably strange and unnatural for her, if Hero had to guess. It was strange and unnatural for him too. No one ever called him that, ever. He had, of course, told her that she could if she wanted, but she never had—not until now that is. Hero’s eyes widened. Strangely enough, he felt a smile tugging at his mouth and the light flutter of a chuckle reverberating in his chest listening to her say it.

“I’m serious. I’m going to keep calling you that until you stop that,” she insisted. “Stop being a ‘Hero’—stop worrying about everybody else for just a second. It won’t kill you to be a little selfish for once…and it’ll honestly make the rest of us look better,” she quipped with a slight smile, clearly trying to brighten his mood.

It worked. His mouth twitched into a small smile as he replied dryly, “I’m sorry. I’ll try…”

“Good,” she said, but her expression softened as she reached out her hand to him. “But really…how are you? What do you need? What makes you happy when you feel like this?”

Hero shrugged his shoulders. If he was being honest, he didn’t know—even after all these years, he didn’t know, but… just having someone there, having someone listen to him…he already felt better. His face softened, and he felt something warm spreading through his chest as he met her kind eyes.

“Maybe a hero sandwich?” he shrugged his shoulders with a gentle smile, and her face brightened.

She gently nudged him in the arm before playfully taking his spatula. “Great,” she said. “I’ll make you one.”

#hero needs a hug #poor hero 🥺 I only want good things for him #hero deserves to be happy #really inspired to write this after my will Hero find love again poll #warms my heart to know that so many people want good things for Hero #male-female friendship for the win!! #my fanfiction #thanks for reading #major spoilers for omori #reposted to my side blog

[linusbenjamin]

Happy Birthday to Terry O'Quinn 🎂 (b. July 15, 1952)

#lost #lostedit #tvedit #lost spoilers #john locke #nikolatexla #i was gonna gif his man in black scenes too but maybe next time #happy birthday to this wonderful actor 🎉🎉🎉 #absolutely loved his portrayal of john locke and especially man in black #some actors really deserve every penny of that money #'you either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the villain' and he did both :)

[upperranktwo]

☆Dabi | Blueflame☆

Happy Birthday Gab ♡ @roronoua

#bnhaedit #bnhasource #dailyanime #dailyanimatedgifs #anisource #boku no hero acedamia #bnha #my hero acedamia #sky gifs #useradrienne #usergojoana #usermemi #usermica #usergokalp #userokkottsus #useraki #userlisette #happy bday bestie <3333333 I hope you like thisss!!! #I know dabi is one of your babygirls so I wanted to gif him just for you <33333 because ilyyyy sm!!! #you're so funny and amazing gab!!! I adore you sm <3 you deserve the world!!!! #I'm sorry if this looks a little boring but I hope it looks okie!!!! #hope you're having a lovely day so far my darling beloved!!!! #the 3rd gif looks so out of place since it's not a flame based one but it's an !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! moment so it needs to be included

[iknowhowtodream]

what really fuckin does it for me about zac oyama’s killer fucking roles in the last stand is that PRIOR to this fight, and this whole season if we’re being real, his luck? honestly mid as shit.

his BEST nat 20 moment that most people remember is as lapin with sir keradin which happened FOUR FUCKING YEARS AGO (longer actually bc thats when the season aired not when they filmed it).

i think in sophomore year gorgug critted on an attack a Singular Fucking Time (row and the ruction fight if i’m not mistaken). compare that to NOW????

it just makes me so happy to see so many amazing roles from zac this season.

#gorgug thistlespring has been my favorite intrepid heroes pc since DAY ONE #so happy to see him getting so much love #it’s all he deserves!!!! #fhjy spoilers #d20 #zac oyama #gorgug thistlespring #nell speaks