when the batboys get broken bones or other things that can't be fixed in the batcave, and have to go to an actual hospital, they make up the most outlandish sounding excuses for their injuries:
dick (with a broken leg): "well you see, i was actually trying to jump over a river on a pair of rollerskates"
jason (with broken ribs): "i was volunteering at the zoo... feeding the alligators. i fell backwards with the meat in my hands, and one pounced on me. funny how much damage they can do."
tim (with the worst concussion man has ever seen): "oh that? i was walking outside.. and my brothers were playing basketball on the top floor of the house, and one of them accidentally threw the ball out the window, and it landed on my head"
(bruce hears that one and has to reconsider whether or not the version of the story tim told him (getting hit by condiment king's mustard launcher) was the truth or not)
damian (with fingers twisted in every direction): "i play the piano... very violently"
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@homestuckss pinch hit for @topfsecret !!
Reluctant face of the Alternian revolution Karkat is NOT quite used to having an entire security detail yet, and isn't sure why they're all dressed like sci fi adventure movie characters??
to which I would say, if you're gonna be planning an underground revolution against a spacefaring despot why WOULDN'T you dress for the occasion. c'mon.
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Lazarus Pits were foul.
There was no nicer way to put it.
They were supposed to be cracks inbetween the 2 realms where ectoplasm, truly dead and rotten ectoplasm, sank to the bottom of the Ghost Zone and seeped through into the living realm to become apart of the earth, the water, the air. To gather energy and be renewed in order to seep back into the zone to contribute to the everlasting exchange of energies between the 2 realms.
That's what they were supposed to be. Until they were stopped up.
The dead ectoplasm never stopped leaking through, but it never returned back to the zone. It got stuck, held in place with old magics whispered in lost tongues that forced it to stay. To stagnate. To ooze over souls that were supposed to pass over and draw them back into their earthly bodies.
The Pits were a literal crime against nature and those who bathed in it came out with the stench of rotting magic clinging to them like a thick sludge as a marker to the dead and those blessed with the sight that there was something very wrong with the person.
Which is why when Phantom met the Red Hood for the first time, he instantly recoiled with his nose scrunched up in disgust and said 'Oh god ew, what the fuck.'
This happened in front of everyone.
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There are already jokes circulating around that the Red Hood is just like a rabid dog
Despite that everyone is surprised when he shoes up wearing a collar with Red Robins symbold dangling from it, clearly showing who he belongs to
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practice batfam portraits except idk what im doing
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it's 1am and i'm currently confronting the fact we have not had an on-panel jayroy interaction in five wholeass years
afaik last time jason and roy were actually in the same page together was for rhato annual #2 in 2018
they've mentioned each other in passing since then yeah, but omfg i don't think they've even been in the same vicinity since roy went to sanctuary?????
someone PLEASE prove me wrong bc it cannot have been 5 actual years
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the way the Under the Red Hood arc retroactively makes Batman: The Cult read like its prologue makes me feel insaaaaane (and is also a big part of why i'm so attached to the idea of native jason)
the final issue of Batman: The Cult came out in november of 1988, making it, alongside the garzonas arc, the last thing jason appeared in before A Death in the Family in december 1988, and Under the Red Hood mirrors it so perfectly in so many ways, i have a genuinely hard time believing it wasn't intentional and that post-resurrection jason wasn't inspired at least in part by deacon backfire
they both set out to take gotham under the pretense of "saving" it, both go about it by seizing control of gotham's "underworld," and the way their respective plans unfold & unravel as the story plays out is incredibly similar
they both end up having another, less selfless motivation. blackfire wants to be killed so he'll be revered as a martyr, jason wants to punish bruce, and the endings of both their arcs are nearly identical, with both of their plans culminating in an attempt to goad bruce into killing them (albeit with wildly different tones lol)
in both, bruce's reason for refusing is exactly the same
and the narration in Batman Annual #25 is such a perfect mirror of bruce's ending monologue in Batman: The Cult, it actually makes me want to screaaam
like... if this wasn't on purpose, it's maybe one of the wildest coincidences in human history
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