#i cannot choose. i need your help Tumblr | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

monstermoviedean · 2 years

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i saw a post today where someone stated that they often can't tell real information from misinformation online. i am not here to make fun of that person. that being said, the ability to figure out if information is real or not is a critical skill for everyone who uses the internet. you need to be able to do that on your own. it's great if you can get help or if people will tell you what's real and what's not, but you also need to be able to do it by yourself. simple, easy tips under the cut.

the most common style of misinformation i see on tumblr is the fake news headline. it's an image or multiple images of a headline and sometimes an attached story. easy tips to discovering whether this is real or not:

is there a link in the post? click it and see where it goes. no link? possibly fake, possibly the poster just didn't include it.

google the full headline, not just key words. even better, google the headline with the full headline in quotes so you get exact matches. can't find a match? probably fake.

is there a clear url/website attached to the headline? if so, go to the website and search for the headline. can't find a match? probably fake.

is there an author? google them. see if they're real. see if the subject of the article matches the stuff they usually write about. see if they have social media where they may have posted the headline. can't find an author, or they seem way off-track? probably fake.

if it's an image of a tweet, look up the person's twitter handle. can't find the tweet? possibly fake. it could also be a real tweet with the text or date edited.

is there a date? a story written in 2002 may have very different ramifications than a story written in 2022. it depends on the subject, but some subjects change rapidly and even a 5-year-old story may be out of date. see if you can find anything recent. if not, it may be fake or out of context.

go to google news and do a quick scan. this is going to work better for headlines that are about world news, but it's still worth a try. google news also allows you to search stories and limit by date. see if you can find a matching headline. if you can't, it may be fake or old news.

general tips:

don't trust social media. just don't. please. people can and will say literally anything they want. anything you read on social media that has real-world implications, you should fact-check.

you may think it's overkill, but google everything. even things you're mostly sure of. reading more headlines and more news can help you get better at discerning between real and fake headlines.

every source of information is biased in some way. try to seek out less biased sources. look up the bias media chart (here's a link) and use it to find sources that do less biased and more original reporting.

think about bias as you're reading. who is the author writing for? why are they writing? what do they want the audience to feel? what facts are they choosing to include or omit? how might the presentation of the facts change if someone with a different perspective was writing?

there are also websites dedicated to fact-checking. this works best for major world news, but try snopes or factcheck. the rand corporation has a huge list of tools for rooting out disinformation as well.

there's nothing wrong with asking for help, but if you genuinely cannot figure out if something is real or not on your own, and you give up trying to figure it out without help, you run the risk of believing and even spreading misinformation. some misinformation is essentially harmless (a celebrity's favorite color, for example). some misinformation is incredibly dangerous. please please PLEASE check your facts. it is quick and easy and worth it.

if you need more help, let me know.

#this is not a vague at anyone and personally i think some misinformation is funny.#*** **** ********** was hysterical i laughed my ass off at that #mutuals this is very much NOT about you <3 #however. i was really concerned that someone essentially said the only way they could tell if something was fake is if it was tagged #again not making fun of that person #not opposed to tagging or asking for help but i am concerned that not everyone here can figure out what's real and what's not #everyone needs to be able to do that #period.#happy to provide help or answer questions but this is a skill everyone - myself included - can and should work on #also i know 10 pm on mcr night is a bad time to post this but it was bothering me

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shootingmorningstar · 1 month

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[slides on in] well hello there fellow lucifer fanatic

could i request some hcs with luci and an indecisive reader? gn and established relationship!! ex: he asks what they want for dinner and they panic trying to pick something because they feel like they need to decide right then and there or they’ll annoy him.

please and thank you! 🫶

anon, you're just like me fr. i also can never make up my mind and love lucifer. i'd be happy to write this for you .ᐟ

thank you for my first request, by the way ~ .ᐟ now to get to the good part.

LUCIFER MORNINGSTAR X GN! INDECISIVE READER

Look at this man. This is the man who has piles upon piles of rubber ducks in his workshop. You cannot tell me Lucifer isn't also indecisive, at least when it comes to less serious things.

Seriously. You expect me to believe he hasn't looked at his own work and went 'nope, looks bad. starting over.' .ᐣ

With that being said, I think he would find it an incredibly endearing trait in you. The concentrated face you make when you're stuck between two options .ᐣ Absolutely adorable.

That is, until the unsure and conflicted look on your face morphs into one telling of your anxiety and worry.

Now, I hope you'll excuse the bird pun, but he is absolutely a mother hen type.

The second he sees even a hint of panic on your face .ᐣ He's immediately shifting all of his focus on you -- if it hadn't been already.

He's rushing over to you without you having to so much as ask -- his beloved partner, distressed .ᐣ No matter the reason, that won't do. He won't rest until he sees you smiling again.

Wrapping his arms around you in a hug, likely even his wings, too. He's suffered so many panic attacks before, he knows just how miserable they are.

He wishes you had come into his life earlier so you could of comforted him through the worst of his.

Even if your panic hasn't dissolved into a full blown attack, he is there. His touch is grounding, it helps you calm down and come back to reality.

When your heart's stopped racing and you look as if you're able to talk about it, he'll ask you just what has you so distressed.

Don't even bother trying to lie to him. He can tell when someone's hiding their feelings.

He won't force you to tell him, though. He just wants to know what went wrong so he can help prevent it from happening again.

If you decide to share your worries with him, he wouldn't belittle you in the slightest. Is it time you need .ᐣ You two have all the time in the world.

Would you rather he choose .ᐣ Because he wouldn't mind.

Or if it's something more serious, he offers to sit down with you and discuss the pros and cons of each -- maybe you two can come up with a decision together .ᐣ

His face sort of falls if you decide to tell him part of the reasoning behind your anxiety is a fear that you'll end up annoying him. Did he do something to make you think he'd judge you .ᐣ

Or maybe he got short with you .ᐣ He's so apologetic. He wants you to feel like you can share anything and everything with him.

He won't let himself start feeling overwhelmed with guilt, though. This moment is about you and the reassurance you need, not his guilt issues.

Explain to him that you know he'd never do such a thing and that it's just an irrational thought coming from worry and he's taking your face into his hands, telling you that he would never, ever think less of you, much less get upset over something as silly as struggling to make a choice.

Like he said earlier, let him help you choose. You two are stronger together and this is no exception.

He's always soft to you, but count on him being even more so than usual for the rest of the night. You two can watch your favorite show or movie -- or whatever you'd like to do to destress. ♡

first request finished ~ .ᐟ how'd I do .ᐣ i'd love to hear your thoughts. feedback fuels my writing muse more than anything else .ᐟ

i'm really hoping this formats correctly, i'm used to using the tumblr app && currently stuck on laptop </3

#hazbin hotel #hazbin lucifer #lucifer x reader #lucifer morningstar x reader #hazbin hotel x reader #admin kitty #lucifer morningstar

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fernthewhimsical · 28 days

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Hopepunk Primer pt. 2

Philosophy of Hopepunk

I cannot express this better than other people have done before me. So I'll start with an interview Kayti Burt had with several hopepunk authors in 2019.

"What is hopepunk? It depends on who you ask…

Rowland, quoting her essay “One Atom of Justice, One Molecule of Mercy, and the Empire of Unsheathed Knives,” says: “Hopepunk is a subgenre and a philosophy that ‘says kindness and softness don’t equal weakness, and that, in this world of brutal cynicism and nihilism, being kind is a political act. An act of rebellion.’”

To understand hopepunk as a concept it helps to understand what it stands in contrast to. Grimdark is a fantasy subgenre characterized by bleak settings in which humanity is fundamentally cutthroat, and where no individual or community can stop the world’s inevitable decline. Hopepunk, in contrast, believes that the very act of trying has meaning, that fighting for positive change in and of itself has worth—especially if we do it together." [4]

When Alexandra Rowland was asked on Tumblr to expand on the initial statement she made she elaborated:

"Hopepunk says that genuinely and sincerely caring about something, anything, requires bravery and strength. Hopepunk isn’t ever about submission or acceptance: It’s about standing up and fighting for what you believe in. It’s about standing up for other people. It’s about DEMANDING a better, kinder world, and truly believing that we can get there if we care about each other as hard as we possibly can, with every drop of power in our little hearts." [5]

I also love the definition of the Tumblr blog @hopepunk-humanity:

"What is Hopepunk?

Wild laughter from ragged throats

Flowers growing choked from crumbling asphalt

A warm bed after a long, hard journey

Your partner’s hand cupped in your own

Bright graffiti on cracked tunnel walls

The chains falling loose to the stone floor

A glint of silver beneath a century of tarnish

A long rain after a blistering wildfire

Just one more step, and then another

A single candle flame joining the stars against the night

A loved ones voice calling your name after hours lost in an unfamiliar place

A hand taking yours, just when you’d given up on reaching out

Smiling, laughing again, when you thought you’d forgotten how

Knowing, despite everything, that humans are inherently good

It’s not simply blind optimism, or naivety. It’s choice. It’s taking the human race by the hand and saying, “I will love you, because I am you”. It’s facing a world dripping with cynicism and fashionable hopelessness and saying, “no, I will not give in”. It’s putting kindness out into the world, knowing you might not get it back, knowing you may be scorned for it, knowing it might not change anything, but with a certainty that kindness is what the world needs the most.

It is choosing hope" [6]

Hopepunk is choosing hope in a world where they want us to have none. It's choosing humanity when they want us to forget we are human. It's choosing community when they would benefit of us staying individuals. It's choosing action and hope when they want us struck down and paralyzed.

Alexandra Rowland emphasizes to not forget the second part of the word: Punk. In another interview with Kayti Burt for Den of Geek she says: "it’s important to remember that punk is the operative half of the word – punk in the sense of anti-authoritarianism and punching back against oppression." and "The instinct is to make it only about softness and kindness, because those are what we’re most hungry for. We all want to be treated gently. But sometimes the kindest thing you can do for someone is to stand up to a bully on their behalf, and that takes guts and rage." [7]

What is Hopepunk to me?

That spark that is both love and spite that keeps me going. It's seeing the good in humanity, while also acknowledging the harm. It's refusing to lay down and die, refusing the accept the status quo, refusing to believe that this is it. It's believing in a better world. In kindness. In the inherent sense of community in humanity. It's believing in the power of stories. It's seeing kindness and hope as an act of Sacred Rebellion. And spreading that kindness and hope is a Vow that I have taken. It's taken the anger I have against corporations, injustice, bigotry, capitalism, oppression, and letting it fuel the fire within me in a constructive way. It's working to dismantle systems that are oppressive to work towards a more inclusive world. It's pruning the garden of dead weight so new things can grow. Late stage capitalism wants us all to be docile, to work, not to live. So I will shout my small joys from the rooftops. I will create for the sake of creating. I will practice radical acceptance so that I stand strong above the masses of ads that wants me to hate myself. I will choose to see the good so that I can believe change is possible. Hopepunk a fire that says "Rage. Rage against those who deserve it. Stand up for those who do not and show them a better world is possible."

[4] Den of Geek - Are you afraid of the darkness: a hopepunk explainer [5] Alexandra Rowland tumblr post [6] Hopepunk-humanity - what is hopepunk [7] Den of Geek - a hopepunk guide: interview with Alexandra Rowland

Part 1: Intro and history Part 2: Philosophy of Hopepunk Part 3: How to practice hopepunk and further reading Part 4: Extra! Hopepunk and magic

#witchblr #hope #hopepunk #personal #mine #divider by saradika

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keluang-hijau · 2 months

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If you have even a dollar to spare to help Palestine, you should definitely send it directly to organizations:

Anera. PCRF (they have a Ramadan 2024 campaign right now with 4% raised as of writing this). UNRWA. and more listed here.

or people working on the ground to provide aid:

Help Gaza Children: updates site, pypl, gfm. Mona's initiative to provide direct aid in Gaza. Care for Gaza: twitter, pypl. Sulala Animal Rescue: instagram, fundraiser with free drawings, pypl for direct donation or donate through Animals Australia (here is the tumblr post I referenced). Salam Animal Care: twitter, pypl, gfm.

sponsor a family from Operation Olive Branch spreadsheet. send esims to people in Gaza.

If you live comfortably without any substantial risk financially, then it becomes your responsibility to contribute more. Please don't hesitate to donate. You do not lose wealth when you give to people who need it. That 10 dollars or 5 dollars or 1 dollar is worth so so much if it is the only thing you can give.

The daily clicks is meant for people who do not have any way to financially help Palestine. If you cannot send money for any reason at all, please go ahead and do those daily clicks. Use multiple devices, different browsers, incognito/ private mode. So you can contribute more clicks in a day. Set reminders so you can be consistent. Even if it is small, if everyone contributing does the same effort, it will be more helpful than nothing at all.

And do not let daily clicks and donations be the end all of your support for Palestine. There are so many ways to engage and get involved, and this post is a non-exhaustive list. Boycott products and keep up with the BDS movement, join protests and direct action, pressure your representatives by calls/ emails /letters, listen and amplify Palestinian voices (follow social media accounts of journalists, doctors, scholars, people in Gaza and diaspora), learn and familiarize about Palestine and disinformation (free ebooks), make art, appreciate Palestinian culture and art (tatreez, kufiya, films / another film site, books, poetry, businesses), talk and discuss with your close ones and community, don't interact with Israel supporters / Zionist ideology, and stay hopeful. Every effort within your power that you choose to do is important.

#palestine #gaza #free palestine #gaza strip #free gaza #israel #how to help palestine #palestine will be free #help gaza children #operation olive branch #anera #pcrf #unrwa #care for gaza #sulala animal rescue #resources

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kastelixa · 4 months

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Instead of posting pointless callouts, use your brains.

tldr: some of yall need to learn what a fucking block button is

Genuinely what is so hard about pressing the block button? Like omg I promise no one cares about your fuckass callout posts or rants. Like some of these people are embarrassing as hell. If you get triggered by shit on the internet, it’s YOUR decision on wether or not you want to interact or block and move on with your life. Like brother, i’m not going to throw a fit and freak out over some post that just so happened to contain weird shit on it. You know what I do? I MOVE ON WITH MY LIFE. Because I got better shit to worry about than some random ass fic on tumblr.

You like ddlg? Cool. Doesn’t hurt me or anyone, I don’t care. You like incest? Good for you! You like noncon? Okay! Like do y’all see how easy it is to just smile and nod? Trust, policing what people post and enjoy, is not going to change shit. It’s just annoying as fuck. People pick and choose, because some of the shit you all consume wouldn’t be considered normal either, going by what you all say.

According to all of your logic, blood kinks, knife kinks, gun kinks, piss kinks, and etc. should not be normalized either. Murder shouldn’t be written about, especially gore. Which is fucking moronic, considering how RE is built on violence and gore. Please, learn how to separate fiction from reality.

Many people are fans of iconic slasher films and horror movies. Michael Myers is a rapist and a murderer. But guess what? No one CARES! Because he’s not REAL. I could go on with so much more examples, but you should get the point by now. Hopefully. Dark content is everywhere, why is it now that it’s weird? Makes no fucking sense.

I get that some of you don’t want your precious white boy’s image to be tainted or defamed or whatever, but trust, Leon Kennedy is not reading these fics nor would he care. ‘He’s not a rapist or into incest!’, well he also wouldn’t call you ‘sweetheart’ or whatever cheesy bs fluff fics contain nowadays. But that’s the whole point, isn’t it? It’s all OOC. We KNOW he’s not a horrible person or an incredibly affectionate lover, but people write whatever they want. And no one’s going to stop them! Not the posts clogging up the tags or the weird asks.

There’s so much more, but the main arguments that keep being repeated are ‘it’s weird’ and ‘if you write about it, you’re probably going to do it in real life’. That take is so fucking stupid I can’t help but laugh. Same bs as white moms claiming their son is going to shoot some place out just because he plays violent video games. The whole point? SEPARATE FICTION FROM REALITY. And if you don’t like something? IGNORE IT? Why are you willingly engaging like omg are you stupid or dumb.

OH AND. ‘kids could see this!’ When will you all learn that no matter what you do, you cannot control what a person sees or decides to interact with. Especially minors. I’m willing to bet half of a smut writers followers are minors. Guess what? People lie all the time, about their ages and whatever else. It’s the fucking internet, of course they do. It’s not the responsibility of the blog owner to take care of children. The most they could do is plaster a big fat MDNI on their blog, that’s it. It’s the job of the parents to control what their kid watches or consumes, and we can’t exactly help with that. So don’t pretend to gaf about minors like omg.

Anyways. I’m too lazy to continue writing like I just needed to say this because some of you are slow. Me and many others are going to continue to write whatever the fuck we want. In conclusion? Block if you don’t like it LMAO. I don’t care about what some rando has to say on the internet.

#🪼☆.thinking #leon kennedy x reader #leon kennedy x y/n #leon kennedy x you #leon s kennedy x reader #leon s kennedy x y/n #leon s kennedy x you #dark content #some of yall r DUMB

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blamseastore · 1 year

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All in one download + discord link

Hey guys!

So, there are lot of different places you can download EA’s store content. The purpose of how I do it was to give you the option to pick and choose the items you want. Everything is individualized, but since I’ve finished the majority of the work, there’s been a lot of asks for an easy way to download everything in one go. I’ve slowly been uploading bulk versions of each set, but that’s not exactly what you’re all asking for right?

This is the best compromise I found. My store content folder looks like this:

(FORGOTTEN is what I call the limited sets that you can’t find on the store anymore. ie: Dr Pepper sets)

I have merged every piece of store content I’ve uploaded in these 6 huge files (the biggest is 2GB) with the separated folder for content that also needs to standalone to work properly.

THIS works for me. BUT

It doesn’t mean it will work for everyone. I’ve decided to share these, but I cannot guarantee this format will work for you and I will not be uploading a different set up. I will not be helping you troubleshoot problems associated to this - you download and use at your own risk.

Here is the google drive folder containing the files: https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1SuQohFbSvOPXEFVzGRbmr7UwlEVlgIYj?usp=sharing

You’ll find the 6 files and folder to put in your Mods/Packages.

ADDITIONALLY, you’ll find a folder containing all the store content lots that you have to place in your Library folder.

FINALLY, you’ll find a folder containing all my .world files with a ReadMe.txt explaining where they go depending on where you got the game.

Everything has been compressed using https://www.7-zip.org/ because I have limited google drive storage.

ENJOY

I have been uploading everything on discord, if you have it, come say hi! It’s easier to help you troubleshoot any issues you have and others might have experienced the same thing. There are no broken links on discord either because unlike tumblr and blogger, it doesn’t have it out for me.

https://discord.gg/fTFw9xVj2d

#blams #ask

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hello-vampire-kitty · 5 months

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Servamp online kuji: how to get the merchandise

There are new Servamp merchandise that can be obtained through online kuji (lottery)

(h)ttps://kujibikido.com/lp/servamp/?utm_source=twitter&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=twi

Tumblr has a problem with links, remove the () from the adress to go on the kuji website.

I'll try to provide some help if you would like to obtain them, based on my experience ordering stuff from Japan.

To start off, the kuji will start on December 1st and will last until December 29th (Japan time).

One draw costs 770 yen.

Estimated shipping time: Ships around early March to early April 2024

Alright, so how kuji works is that you have categories, this one having from A-D and another one called S. Each category has different merchandise and you cannot choose the item you want, so if you wanted an item with a specific character within the category and you don't get it on the first draw, you'll have to try again until you get it.

From what I have seen on the official website, if you only get the S category, you can select between these two framed artworks.

Category A- Acrylic stands

Category B- Half tapestries

Category C- Acrylic charms

Category D- Can badges

Okay, so like I mentioned, it's been a while since I bought things from Japan and only once did I get stuff from kuji.

If you never bought from Japan before, you're gonna have to look into a proxy or forwarding service. They're middlemen basically that will ship items where you live because most shops in Japan do not have international shipping.

A proxy service is where you will have everything handled by the service, from buying until shipping your items.

This method is for those who are not confident to handle part of the processes themselves because they don't understand Japanese.

Proxy might also be the only option if for some reason, you want to order stuff within Japan to be delivered to the middleman's warehouse, however your debit/credits cards might be rejected. (not many online stores offer Paypal or Google Pay. Animate Japan has Paypal, I got Servamp merchandise from there).

So if you try various cards and none of them will work, then you have to use proxy service because some shops might reject foreign cards.

If there are stuff that you want from online stores that sell second-hand items (such as Mercari) or you want something from auctions, you have to use proxy because you need someone in Japan to discuss with the sellers.

You need to look into services and see which ones will be best for you, based on their handling fees and what things they can do on your behalf, like the stuff like I mentioned above.

So, I summarized the proxy service and there's another one called forwarding service that I mainly used in order to reduce costs, because shipping isn't cheap...

The main difference about forwarding service is that you handle the buying part. You make the necessary accounts on the websites where the merchandise is sold, maybe even have to reply to messages...

If choose this option, when you create accounts on websites, you have to use the shipping adress provided by the forwarding service.

Once you set up the accounts and succeed in making purchases, the items will be delivered to the warehouse in Japan, to the middle-man.

So, this is the option if you want to save a bit of money. You can't do auctions or buy from second-hand shops because they are bit more complicated and you would need the help of someone living in Japan.

I hope this helps! You gotta look into these services and see their offers. Wish you good luck if you will try getting the merchandise!

#servamp #kitty posts

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bsverryin · 9 months

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: ̗̀➛ JJk men as your past life lover & reuniting again in your present life.

Who?

╰┈➤ Geto, Gojo, Nanami

Situation?

╰┈➤ How you reunite again after dying in your past lives.

✎ dying in past life but I'm still making it wholesome🙄, HEADCANONS ONLY!! I'm not a manga reader!! 🫸🏻🫷🏻 I'll try to make this a whole story because I really need more jjk men x reader here in tumblr (wholesome ones) 🥹 Nanami is my comfort character that's why I include him in almost everything tehee 🤌 cannot assure you of perfect grammar because idk how jkjk.. DMS are open 🫶

: ̗̀➛ GOJO SATORU

Loving satoru in your past life was like the sun loving the moon, He was everything. Every part of him was perfect, but reaching him was never easy. Satoru was in one of the biggest clans in your country. Every girl wanted to be his bride. One for his money, two for his looks, never for his skills and for the person he is. Well, you were one of those princesses. You knew your land needed help and money, your clan wasn't powerful or even well-known unlike them, they have everything that your clan wanted. You had no choice but to try, you were devoted and loyal to your clan that you'd do everything to save it from falling apart that you'd join the party of the richest clan to find a bride for their son.

You weren't good with crowds not when you didn't know anyone there, you didn't know how to act too. The only thing you were doing was imagining what the person that you might be marrying looks like, what if he's actually old that's looking for a person to marry? The palace was getting louder and louder that you decided to visit their garden, good thing it was open for everyone. When you're on the way to admire the beautiful scenery from outside you saw someone sitting on the risky railings, one move then they'll fall. you immediately run to them and grab their arm.

"Hey! Hey!... Little guy do you wanna talk 'bout your problems? Dying is not the solution!"

".......little guy?" He was speechless at first but his voice wasn't that deep. His hair was white, His eyes were blue. He was so majestic that you became speechless too.

"don't die.. It's not worth it." He chuckled as he saw your worried face.

"What's your name, princess?" You gave him a confusing look, he was laughing?! How could he? You thought.

That was the first time that you met your future lover. You weren't expecting that he was gonna be the one you'll marry because he looked lonely, Satoru said that the only reason he chose you was because he didn't want to choose anyone else. His clan helped your clan and everything was just getting better. You were slowly falling in love with him too, When he's far away, you'd send him a letter and he sends you one too. You grew to love on another but then a happy ending doesn't exist especially in your world where the sign of living is when you get hurt. Your clan was bombed so was theirs, you tried to find him but when you saw a glimpse of him, you were shot in your back and he saw it with his own eyes. He was really powerful and strong but was distracted when he saw your lifeless body. He ran into you despite the mess that the other clan was making. He died right when you're in his arms.

Satoru, a special grade sorcerer while you didn't know what blood you had that you'd always see weird spirits, You ignored it at first but you knew if you kept ignoring them you'll immediately be killed. You're in high school and at the rooftop trying to appreciate the lovely nature, you felt a sudden push from your back as you tried to look, it was the weird spirits you've been seeing. When you thought it was the end of your life a man with white haired in a uniform. With glasses but you can feel his blue eyes staring at your soul, you didn't die because he saved you.

"Nice catch, satoru." A man with his hair tied said.

"Told you, suguru. We're the strongest!" He said enthusiastically and turned to examine you, he was relieved when he saw no injuries.

"From now on, you're our classmate okay?" The man named "Satoru" smiled and gave you a thumbs up.

It was the first time you met gojo satoru in your present life, you felt like you met him before and as if there were strings attaching you two together, you couldn't understand the feeling. You were there when his best friend left, you were there as he grew older. You both became parents to a little guy called "Megumi". You and satoru had liked each other for long but you decided to just stay together as sorcerer and help the kids have the youth they deserved but it felt like you were married and loving each other. For you both, it was more than enough than truly being in a relationship.

: ̗̀➛ GETO SUGURU

Suguru in your past life was a normal human being, You were in highschool and had a little crush on him. He was nice and he'd help you study, he was a gentle man and everything that you wanted for a man, he's the same to everyone but he was always busy training, you'd ask him why and why and his answers are always the same. It was to create a world where people don't struggle. He was specifically training about how things work, those machines and how to use swords and anything else that exists, he was that kind of person who cares about others before him.

"I think the only thing you should focus on, is yourself" You said as he's trying to mind his own business making machine, you didn't know what machine was it for but he's really working hard that it got you really invested and staying with him until he finishes.

"Why is that?, Y/N" He wasn't focused on you, he was working hard for the machine he's making.

"You're always trying hard but I don't see anyone appreciating what you do, i think you should appreciate yourself first then others will appreciate you!" You said, not trying to be rude and hoping it won't come out the wrong way.

"It's enough that you're here watching me do this." He smiled when he heard your words. You were relieved that he didn't take it the wrong way. He was making a machine to make it easier for the soldiers to make it during some possible world war. You didn't really understand it but you tried your best to help him. Not just because you're his friend but because you liked him too, he was smart and handsome. What more could you want? He was in denial of his feelings that's why you thought he had been leading you on, you've been clinging to him that you thought it was fine. But still he lets you, he's sweet when you're alone together.

He loved you too but he's not strong enough for you. He knew the day would come where he wouldn't be able to protect you. Which was this day, He knew you had an incurable disease. When you're not there to help him, he has been trying to make and find medicine for you to cure your disease but he failed. He wanted you first to have good health and he'd date you but that time just didn't come. it's been 12 years since you died and all he did now was keep photographs of you and invent something useful for other people and waited for the time where you'll meet each other again, his body was strong that the reason of his death was his old age.

In your present life, Suguru was the sorcerer's biggest enemy. You knew the sorcerer world because you have been trained ever since you were a child, of course it was to be able to exorcist those monsters but you were pressured to do things that you didn't want. Your life was controlled by your family.

"y/n?" You knew who he was, It was Geto suguru. You tried to kill him but you just couldn't get him. He was good at everything, he can bring out enemies out of nowhere but despite that you still tried to kill him.

"How about a deal, Y/N?." You looked at him curiously, there were still no enemies or even shikigamis. He thought you're too weak for that.

"Live a life, and spread your wings." Geto suguru said, you didn't know what he meant but you know he's tricking you to go with him. You let him trick you but you had one in your sleeves too. You wanted to expose him and make your family proud but suguru was nice and made you believe in him. You were surprised when you realized you were following his footsteps. He didn't want anything in return. You met a lot of people who told you he helped them too that you started to doubt yourself. They weren't right or wrong. Suguru was a nice person, he saved you from the hell that your family has been causing you.

"Why are you doing this to me?" You asked suguru, you were both alone together in a sparkling fancy night.

"I want to make a world where suffering will end." You knew what he meant when he said that but why?

You created a whole new family by his side. They weren't tricking you, they even said about the plan where they are taking you as bait to make others surrender. Suguru confessed to you first, he said he sees you as a woman, he may look like he's not the type too. He doesn't want to let you go out of his side. He wasn't possessive just overprotective, you didn't understand why but it felt like there was some unfinished business that you had with him that you let your heart and destiny to control yourself this time.

: ̗̀➛ NANAMI KENTO

In your past lives, kento was the person you were most scared of. He was your boss specifically the strict and serious boss. There was nothing more to describe him. People often say that you're as smart as him and because of that he has high expectations of you, if he liked your work he'd give you a bonus if he didn't he sighs and gives you a disappointed look, thankfully he always likes your ideas. You never thought of someone like him to be in love with you.

One day, you had overtime. Loads of work that you wanted to finish so that you can have your break early. The only person left in that office was your boss and you, there were still guards down stairs of course. You and kento weren't talking, minding your own business. You stood up, about to leave when your boss called you.

"Y/N.." Your boss called.

"Yes, sir?" You immediately turned to look at him, he was always staring at you deeply that made you run shivers throughout your body.

"I'll take you home." He said as he stood up to get ready.

"Oh no sir, you don't have to I can-" He cutted you off.

"it wasn't a question, I have to make sure my employees get home safely." He sighed as you both made your way down the parking lot.

That moment made you closer to your boss, you couldn't keep your mouth shut that you asked everything to keep your conversation going. You weren't a fan of being awkward. Your boss has become more comfortable around you and when you're both on overtime he'd take you for a ride, you thought it was just twice or thrice moment but you both had been used to it. You both had been staying for so late in the office just so you both can go home together. It made you two friends, close friends and lovers, He had been calling you in his office often, shutting the blinds just to kiss you. You kept a secret relationship with him and you wish you didn't. Kento was on the other side of the street, you checked the lights and it was green, you were about to run when you felt a car crashing in your body, it wasn't just you. It was kento trying to save you but failed causing you both to die in the middle of the street.

You're the owner of one of the richest companies in the world in your present life, kento nanami was just one of your employees. He's working normally just like everyone else so why is it that you feel like there's potential in him? Well, you'd give him a random bonus when you felt like it. When he said that he's quitting for good, it kept you awake at night.

Why would he want to quit your company when you'd give him a bonus whenever you're feeling great? Does he not like the special treatment you give him? You tried and tried to find information about him that you found out he's a sorcerer, you knew what a sorcerer is. You knew how to exorcist, it was your side work when you felt sad. How could you just find out now that he's a sorcerer too? It made you more Into him than you already were.

"Nanami, fancy seeing you here." You smiled, you were both in a dark alley trying to find a monster to exorcist.

"Ma'am it's not safe for you here." He said formally.

"Why?" Your smile widens as you feel the monster on its way to hurt you. Before the monster can get near, you kill it by your aura without even looking. Nanami was shocked but he quickly regained his normal posture.

"I see, you're full of surprises madam." You both ended up exorcising the whole place until there was nothing left.

Nanami was always surprised when he saw you everywhere he went, it was as if you were stalking him. Well, it was much better than satoru following him everywhere. In the end, he had gotten used to you and your flirty jokes that he lets you hang around him. He often asks you about your company and you'll say someone else is managing it. This man was your type of man, he was a fine aged man, you couldn't stop yourself from falling, it's not like you're trying to stop yourself. Kento, found your presence comforting. He wasn't the romance type but you were. When you confessed to him, he didn't say yes or no. He just wanted you to make a decision where you're most comfortable, you still ended up dating him because he couldn't resist you and you loved spoiling him every single time.

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femmefatalevibe · 1 year

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Femme Fatale Guide: How To Gain Motivation & Get Out of A Rut

Spontaneous motivation is possible but rare. However, learning how to jumpstart this valuable energy to gain the initial momentum you need to create consistent habits and routines necessary to help you achieve your goals. Here are some tips and tricks to get out of a rut and jumpstart motivation.

Create specific goals: Use qualifying and quantifying details (e.g. I intend to stay at the Ritz Paris hotel; I will save $50K by the end of this year, etc.; I'm cultivating a Scandinavian aesthetic; I will eat 3 healthy meals daily during the workweek, etc.)

Organize your goals into different areas of life: Try not to have more than 1-2 goals per life arena at a time (career, finances, health, relationships, self-development, etc.)

Write a short list of 3-5 things you can do to get closer to each of your goals: These can be habits or one-time tasks (e.g. take a walk every day, automate "X" amount of my paycheck into my investment accounts, etc.). Consider this bullet-point list as your high-level action plan. It gives you a roadmap that's simple enough to help you get started without overwhelming your mind with details or complexities. Success is born from simple, consistent habits.

Create a vision board for each goal: Envisioning yourself achieving the goal can spark some initial excitement and motivation. Everything gets clearer when you can see the end in sight.

Write out a "pros" and "cons" list for each goal: Consider the benefits of working towards each goal vs. the downsides. A little fear-based motivation can be healthy as a catalyst to gain some inspiration and momentum.

Get mapping & mathing: Create a mockup of your ideal wardrobe, healthy meals you want to eat, design a mockup of your dream project live on a billboard, all of the places you want to visit in a foreign country, every aspect of your dream date night, etc. Do some quick projections on how much you could be saving with your budgeting goals, and entrepreneurial pursuits, or run the numbers regarding health goals you can work towards (whether it's weight or strength related)

Create a weekly self-accountability goal: Choose one task per goal that you want to accomplish each day (or a few times a week) to get you moving in the direction you desire. Keeping promises to yourself is the simplest way to stay on track.

Track your progress: Make a log of your hours spent reading, working out, check off the days you've had a healthy meal, how many pitch emails you've sent out, any additions or removals from your current wardrobe and environment, etc.

Give yourself a rewarding incentive: Be enough of an adult to use your childlike tendencies to your advantage. Create "if-then" compromises with yourself to ensure you stay on track. E.g: If I make a healthy meal at home for dinner during the week then, I can eat it while watching an episode of my favorite show. If I order-in an unhealthy meal, then I cannot watch my favorite show that night. Savage, I know!

Join supportive online communities & spaces: Find communities on Tumblr, TikTok, Instagram, Reddit, Facebook groups, etc. to find people with similar goals and life outlooks. Read books by authors who have achieved your desired goal, and listen to podcasts on your same wavelength. Find digital ways to cultivate a tribe.

Keep a "Winning" Journal: A notebook that you can write in daily, a few times a week, or weekly to share all of your accomplishments. This method allows you to feel like you can brag and show off a bit, so you get the social validation (even if done in private) while still moving in silence and refraining from appearing arrogant.

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itzalizeyyy · 10 months

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GOODBYE POST + MAIN POINTS OF NON-DUALISM

Hii everyone! Its alizey here, and this will be my last post. I just wanted to say a goodbye and to let you all know I will not be on tumblr anymore. I was not here for a long time to begin with, which was my plan, since I intended to be on here only to learn about my true self and to help others along the way.

I receive more than enough information to know my true self. I never felt so at peace before. And I think it is best to distance myself from any other information to avoid over-consuming.

I already know all I needed to know, and I am satisfied.

I am happy if I helped even a couple of people. Many of you had helped me too. My blogs will still be kept up. You can always go back to them anytime.

Whenever I need a reminder to know who I am, I have it all safe and documented in my notes. Which consists of several screenshots, quotes, messages from amazing, incredible non-dualism bloggers.

I will like to share that with you the main points I learned regarding non-dualism as my last attempt to help you all. If you guys aren’t at that level of peace, satisfaction, and full on knowing of who you are, you will be. Don’t worry.

MAIN POINTS:

• Your true self is pure and absolute awareness. Therefore, you can continue to project more forms of awarenesses, but that is only an projection of you, and never you as a whole.

• You are naturally formless. Your purpose is to be aware, not to be defined. Therefore, your forms can’t defined you. They are simply options for you to experience, and that is all. You can choose what forms to be out of everything that you already are.

• Before, awarenesses was not aware that they were an awareness in the first place. And so they get emotionally involved with their own forms, with their own products, and fail to realize they were the producer this whole time.

• it became a habit for an awareness to inaccurately identify themselves with their forms. There is nothing wrong with the form/ego itself. The ego is what it supposed to be, what it is conditioned to be. The form cannot control what the true self identifies with. All awareness needs to do is to simply break that habit, and the realization will be awaken. Which is realizing awareness is above everything, because it is everything itself, and the thoughts of a small ego can NEVER change that solid fact.

• Awareness is the only true reality. And like mentioned, it can continue to produce more FORMS of realities, but these forms, these realities aren’t actually real. Just because the ego feel like its real doesn’t mean that it is. The ego feel like its real which is based off the human senses, which is, you guess it, also an unreal thing.

• Don’t live as the form, don’t live as the character, simply observe and witness the character and all the stories that comes with that. It feels serious when you COMPLETELY identify with that character only. But once you realize that was never your identity in the first place, then these forms are never serious or harmful to awareness.

• if you continue to be ignorant of your true self, you will continue to project more forms of limited and repetitive reality. And to fight that, rather than accepting who you are, will continue to even produce further of that reality. No need to fight the form because the form is not the problem itself. Simply Wake up. Be awaken. Disregard, detach, disengage of everything you thought you were, because it is all unreal anyways, and you realize awareness is the only true reality that will always remain.

• You can choose what exist and what does not exist. So for the experiences that you don’t want to exist, then..what value is it to you? Freedom means to let go. So, just let it go, and just be what you want to be.

• Remember, you are not bound or limit to ANYTHING. You are naturally bodiless, mindless, formless, timeless. Behave as the ultimate being, as the ultimate creator. In other words, realize that you are the shit !!! Because you are !! You are awareness. It can’t get more badass than that.

• awareness doesn’t see bad or good. Awareness doesn’t have preferences. It is completely neutral about everything. All forms are equal. Ego is the one with opinions, that puts on labels, that put things on pedestals. But Realize the thoughts of an ego will never have any power.

• since all forms are equal because everything is awareness, everything is one, then being aware of “desire” is easily as accessible as being aware of these words. Being aware in imagination is the same as being aware in the physical. Just because they have different labels, or because ego feels them different, doesn’t mean that they are actually separated. Why believe the words and feelings of an ego? Which is all based off the unreal, limited human senses by the way. The unreal can never determine what the real is. The limited can never determine what the unlimited can be. Forms can never actually be what awareness naturally is, and therefore forms will always be below awareness.

• To realize your independence is to eliminate all you used to be dependent to. Such as being dependent on the human senses. Human senses is yet another form of you, therefore it will always be below you. You can’t compare a form to a source. You can’t compared the limited to the unlimited. There is nothing to compared to anyways, when they are all one in the same. Nothing is separated. You are never separated from true self, when that is who you are no matter what.

•••

Thank you guys for everything. Words cannot described how grateful I am to come across this life-changing information on here and to meet these amazing bloggers. May you all find your peace, find your true self, and to be the most free and happy beings out there !!! And as always happy non-dualing everyone!!

#non dualism #conciousness #non duality #nondualism #nonduality #observer

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spectre-requisitions-exchange · 3 months

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Sign-Ups are Open!

Sign ups for the Spectre Requisitions exchange are now open and you may sign up from January 27th to February 10th. You must fill out at least three unique requests and three unique offers. (Requests and offers do not necessarily have to be the same!).

Important links:

Sign-up Form

Nominated Relationships Spreadsheet

View and search requests in the app

Countdown Timer

A couple of reminders:

Treats are now considered OPT-IN. "Treats" are works that are given to you that are not your main assignment. To opt-in to treats, you will need to enable treats on Ao3 AND declare you are open to being treated. If you do NOT specify treat preferences, we will assume you do not want to receive any treats!

To enable treats: Go to “My Dashboard” on your Ao3 account, select “Preferences” from the sidebar, scroll down to “Collections, Challenges and Gifts,” and make sure that the “Allow Anyone to Gift Me Works” box is checked.

You can use the following template in your sign-up box to state your treat preferences if you would like: Open to Treats: Yes / No Open to Treat types: Fanart, Fanfiction Open to Multi-recip treats: Yes / No If you are open to all types of treats, you can simply say "Treats welcome!"

There is a RATINGS box for sign-ups! The box is not mandatory and non-binding but will help with determining who is or is not interested in smut. If you are open to potentially creating or receiving smut, SELECT the "Explicit" option for that offer/request. Please note that this is NOT a guarantee that you will be matched, in either direction, with someone who has opted into smut; and even if you do match in that manner, you're not obligated to create smut (nor are they obligated to create smut for you).

NOW THAT SAID: SIGN UP! SIGN UP! SIGN-UP! CLICK HERE TO SIGN-UP!

You can go back and edit your Sign-Up Form up until February 10th, 8:00PM EST.

How Do I Sign Up? Instructions beneath the cut:

1) Go to the Sign Up Form at AO3.

2) Start writing in the name of your favorite character/pairing from the nominations. Don’t forget to check the spreadsheet if you need inspiration!

3) The box should start to autofill your pairing as you type (if it doesn’t, that is a known Ao3 bug, and if you type it exactly as it is in the tagset, it will accept it). Select your pairing of choice. You can choose two pairings per request, and may have ten requests total.

The two requests do not need to be related; it is simply a way to try to get around the Ao3 restriction of only having 10 sign-up boxes.

4) Decide whether you would like to potentially receive fanart or fanfic, or both. Check the applicable box(es).

5) The RATINGS box on each request indicates whether or not you are open to receiving smut. The box is not mandatory and non-binding but will help with determining who is or is not interested in smut. Please CHECK the "Explicit" box if you want to receive smut; and leave it unchecked if you do not want to receive smut.

6) In the "Description" box, you MUST include: -Any Do Not Wants (DNWs) for the requested relationship(s). We cannot enforce DNWs that are not contained in your Ao3 signup. -Whether you are opting in to treats or not. If you are opting in, you must say which kind of treats you are open to receiving. If you do NOT specify treat preferences, we will assume you do not want to receive any treats!

You can use the following template to state your treat preferences:

Open to Treats: Yes / No Open to Treat types: Fanart, Fanfiction Open to Multi-recip treats: Yes / No

If you are open to all types of treats, you can simply say "Treats welcome!"

You MAY include: -Prompts, general likes/dislikes -- this is used to help your assigned creator know what sort of gift you would most like to receive!

7) Repeat between 3-10 times, as you like!

8) You may write a letter that goes more in-depth and post it to your tumblr, dreamwidth, public google doc, or another platform, and then fill in the URL in the letter box.

9) Fill out your offers. You must fill out at least three unique pairings you would be okay with writing and can choose one or two pairings to fill in per request.

10) The ratings box on each offer indicates whether or not you are open to receiving smut. The box is not mandatory and non-binding but will help with determining who is or is not interested in smut. Please CHECK the "Explicit" box if you want to create smut; and leave it unchecked if you do not want to create smut.

A BIG WARNING ABOUT USING ‘ANY PAIRINGS’: You may choose to offer ANY, but this means you could be matched to ANYONE who has signed up for the archive. Exchange participants beware of this, do NOT pick Any Pairings if you are not up for a challenge!

The only limits we will allow on "any" requests by are the following parameters:

the category of relationship, eg Gen, F/F, F/M, M/M, Multi, or Other: you will get a sign up with at least one request of the chosen category. Can be combined with setting.

the game setting: at least one request will be set in Trilogy or Andromeda, depending or your pick; this can be combined with the above, e.g. "Any trilogy Multi" or "Any Andromeda F/F"

ANY Protagonist Shepard pairing: At least one pairing will feature a Commander Shepard (this restriction will not match Hannah Shepard or Clone Shepard.) You may combine this with a relationship category, e.g., "any Female Shepard F/F".

ANY Protagonist Ryder pairing: You will be matched with a sign up featuring at least one sign-up with a Ryder character (this request will not match Alec Ryder or Ellen Ryder requests). You may combine this with a relationship category, e.g., "any Male Ryder M/M".

No other limits may be selected so chose this CAREFULLY.

11) In the notes, please include any notes for the mods that might help the mods in matching you. For example: "I won't write varren fighting" or "Please do not match me to Councilor Udina". These notes are confidential between the mods and you, and are not shared with your match (or anyone else). You don't have to give reasons; just letting us know what your boundaries are is enough for us to hopefully better match you, and we don't share any information given with other people.

12) Click submit! And welcome to the Mass Effect Spectre Requisitions Rare Pair Exchange!

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moonligyt1234 · 10 months

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SAHSR x Reader

Men SAHSR won. If you dont know what it means it's Self Aware Honkai Star Rail. This can go to two ways. Supposed to be a fanfic im just getting weirded on how to use tumblr i need help.

[NAME] [LAST NAME]

Gender Neutral

They/them

Player Au

Just a game. All the sufferings they have went through was just some from of sick entertainment this cannot be right. They said to themselves.

• They'll pretty much be delusional i mean when you one day suddenly snap out of it like a trance state and find you're self aware that you're just a game character. You'd be gaslighting your self that this is not real.

• But there are some who sees you interesting not really caring wanting to know more of your world.

• It'll probably take some time until then.

• and once they do prepare for the observations.

• They'll be worried of you're sleep schedule. You're mental health. They always try to cheer you up once you logged in back in game.

•If they do fall in love because you're their light on these coded game. ( Author: That sounded cheesy.)

Prime Aeon/ Aeon Reader

• The Aeon of all Aeons. The most respected one. The Greatest Monarch. Their Creator. The Grand Overseer.

• Yeah if you're an aeon some would be on guard considering most Aeons do is cause troubles.

• But you're not. You've helped them, save them and even watch them grow.

• The more they find out about you the more the scrolls have been vanished from time returned.

• Scrolls saying your greatness of how many Aeons worshipped the ground you walk in to.

• If your path somehow activated and able to merge with their paths. The ones who get merged with the path of the Aeon. The said Aeon will be pretty prideful.

• The character who got their pag merged making them know endless possibility. Endless knowledge.

• They would also want to always try the Simulated Universe if you appear their.

• Even if it meant seeing the people you cared have to fight even if it was just a simulation.

• They'd choose to see you.

• Oh beloved Aeon won't you graxe us with your precense. Allow yourself to be bath luxuriousness with their love, care and loyalty.

#sahsr x reader #sahsr au #honkai star rail x reader #honkai star rail #hsr #hsr x reader #yandere hsr #yandere hsr x reader #yandere honkai star rail #yandere honkai star rail x reader

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khaire-traveler · 8 months

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For quite a while now I’ve been struggling to communicate with deities. I am fairly new so I’m not sure what’s the norm. Is it normal to be able to see them or hear them? I don’t have access to divination such as tarot so it makes me like I’m lacking communication skills compared to others. Is it like a specific feeling that just settles in your mind, knowing they’re there? Or am I just doing something wrong?

Hey, Nonny!

I know there's a lot of pressure within the pagan community to be able to communicate flawlessly with deities, and honestly, it's complete bullshit. Not one worshipper is perfect at communicating with deities, and no worshippers can speak for deities.

That being said, you are perfectly fine doing what you're doing as is. While some people can feel the energies of deities when they're around, others cannot, and that's entirely normal. You're not doing anything wrong; if anything, it takes practice sometimes. You may also be what's known within the community as "headblind" meaning you're not able to sense much or anything at all when it comes to spirits, deities, and the like. I personally know many headblind worshippers, and they're all able to love and worship their deities just the same. You don't need to be the actual Pythia - ancient priestess of Apollo who delivered prophecies directly from him - to worship deities.

Since you said you were new, I'm guessing you may also not know of other forms of divination you can try to use to communicate with deities. Oftentimes (and I am guilty of this myself), people have a habit of summarizing all divination usable for deity community to just tarot, but there are endless ways to divine! In fact, my good friend, Mae, is currently doing something where she shares various forms of divination to answer people's questions as a means of celebrating 1,000 followers. I recommend you check out what she's doing, as it can show you just how flexible and unlimited divination can really be. @madmonksandmaenads - this is her tag!

Regarding forms of divination you can try, aside from tarot, there are self-made runes (Greek or Norse), playing cards (like poker cards), Pokemon cards, pendulums, osteomancy (throwing bones), shufflomancy (using music and playlists to answer questions), smoke reading, candle wax reading, tea leaves and coffee residue, bird watching, shower steam (looking at the steam on the walls of your shower or mirror), and literally SO many other ways! The community tends to make it seem like tarot is your only option, but I promise you that you will always have access to at least one form of divination around you. The world itself was crafted and molded by the gods, so naturally, you can find their voices in everything.

I hope this helps you, Nonny. Please know that your worship and practice don't need to look like everyone else's in order to be valid. What you choose to do is what works best for you, and that's ultimately all that matters. You don't need to hear the voices of the gods themselves or see them within your mind's eye 24/7. The stories you often hear about on Tumblr and other platforms tend to be exaggerated; people only really share the most interesting parts of their worship - things that will get views and attention. Try not to feel too bad that your worship is a lot more down-to-earth than others; mine is as well. It's ok that you can't do the things others are claiming to be able to (and remember that sometimes people lie about these abilities). Nothing is wrong with you, Nonny, not a single thing.

I wish you luck on your new journey. Take care, and feel free to ask any questions that you have. 🧡

#anon asks #answered asks #deity communication #paganblr #helpol #deity worship #hellenic polytheism #hellenic pagan #pagan tips

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strawberrylucv · 2 years

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heloo! i think this is my 2nd time coming back to tumblr (＾▽＾) !! BUT ITS OKAY ITS SUMMER AND I CAN WRITE AGAIN!!,, this is such a long overdue post ╥﹏╥ to this day i still get questions if there will be a part 2,, I AM SO SORRY I FORGET THAT I HAVE A BLOG this school yr was rough but here you goo!! part 2!!

again this is angst 💀

characters include : childe, zhongli, kaeya, diluc.

> part 1!

genshin men when they realized that it was only you.

—CHILDE

he realized his mistake a month after,

he realized that it wasn't love that he felt towards this person, but just pure infatuation.

it was love with you

it still is. was he too late?

"this was a mistake," he told himself

he missed you and he wanted you back.

so he tried searching for you, trying to look for you

and when he finally found you.

he fell in love all over again.

"y/n!" he shouted, running up to you with his arms open to give you a big embrace, he whose head rushed up with blood and excitement because he can finally see the one person that could make him feel whole again, seeing you again made him feel so vulnerable yet he wouldn't mind. he wouldn't mind laying all his weaknesses towards his enemies if it meant that you would take him again, his eyes had light that split second until you take a step back. he knew that it was expected but he didn't realize how painful it could be to see your rejection. he notices you carrying a bag so he asked what was inside. you smiled melancholically and showed him.

it was all of his things that were in your bedroom, all the photos of you together, souvenirs from your dates, and his letters from when he was away during missions. he asked what you were going to do with these items, you looked at him with an expression that pained him because he could already guess the words that would come out of your mouth, "it's time to move on."

you walk away from him to dispose the bag but childe grabbed your wrist and held you in his arms, "y/n, i still want you, I still--", you felt his warmth once again, then you realize that this was warmth that left. you were cold for months until someone allowed you to finally feel something again. you hear someone call your name so you pushed childe away because you realized that this man cannot be the man that will stay forever. he just can't, the universe will make sure of it. "i'm sorry." you whisper to him.

"y/n! what're you doing?" the person that called your name asked, you turn around to face them and childe could already see how warm your smile is, "i'm just throwing some trash away." you replied to them.

you introduce childe to the person who helped you through your worst and has loved you even more. "this is aja—no, childe." how his heart broke when you called his name like that. now he realized that he can't make you choose him, he was now just a painful memory to look back on. only a memory. when you two were finally alone again, he asked "could you still love me, y/n?" he gave you his sly smirk, the one you fell in love with.

he wished he could go back in time to change everything

"goodbye, childe. i wish you the best." you tell him and walk away, one step was all he needed to get you back, one look back would be permission for him to go after you

but you never looked back and

he never took one step forward,

just one step back instead.

now you're happy with someone else.

now he'll always be a memory maybe even a forgettable one but to him, you will always be the person he will vow to love.

—ZHONGLI

it wasn't easy realizing he could love two people at the same time.

the only difference is

the other person felt wrong. its as if the world was trying to get them together but it felt so forced.

how his touch felt dirty and wrong when touching someone else that was not you.

after a long reflection with himself, he had realized that his love with you and only you, was true and real.

he was just—confused,

and now alone

longing for you day by day, tormenting himself with how you were now gone.

but one day, he tried to follow your daily routine, remembering where to go because he was so used to it. he wasn't even paying attention to where his feet was leading him, he just wanted to follow it because it was YOUR routine.

and then he saw you.

together with someone else.

"do you think we should get two of these?" the person beside you asked. "what for?" you looked up to them, "so we can get matching sets." they held your hand unexpectedly and you almost drop the cup you were holding because of how flustered you got. they try to grab the cup before it could fall but someone else grabs it. "oh, thank you so much for catching it—" you gave your thanks until you look up to the face who saved it. "y/n." his voice, you forgot how his voiced sounded like. it was zhongli you asked your companion to get the other things in your list. you had told them that you'll be fine. "y/n, i'm—", "you're sorry?" you cut him off, "no. i'm in love with you. still." you were taken aback because you had thought he was coming back for an apology because of the guilt. not his feelings resurfacing after a few months of saying goodbye. "i told you, i'm not the one you'll end up with." "and what if i can change that? what if i dont want to follow what you think, what if i want to follow what i think?" he tried to argue with you. "because i can see through your eyes now that its not me in your future, trust me." you say as you keep your head held high. "you can't decide that, only i can." he emphasized. "i am the god of contra—" you cut him off, "and we ended our contract months ago." many eyes were now on you and him. his hand went up to your face, he was so deprived of you and this was his only chance. you don't try to stop him, "you had your chance months ago, i waited for you and you never came, i'm done with being involved with the god of contracts, i'm done being involved with you." you take his hand off your face. his eyes never leave you, not for one second. "i still love you." "i can't accept your love when i know my heart already chose someone else." you leave him and come back to your companion, you felt your shoulders light. your companion had asked who you were talking to and you just gave them a smile and said that they were your past. zhongli felt heavy as if the rocks he had controlled of was not heavy enough.

all he could think of was your words back then

that this was the best decision.

maybe it really was.

—KAEYA

kaeya never really understood the concept of love.

whether it was familial, romantical, platonically. he really just couldn't understand.

could be because of his past when he was a child, or could be the way he got his vision or it could be that nobody ever really stuck around him for so long.

either that or he never allowed someone to stick to him for so long.

when you left, he didn't think much of it. it was normalcy to him for things to happens like this.

what was not normal to him was the little pains he would get in his chest when he would accidentally call your name.

and obviously, you weren't there. because of his doing.

again, he didn't think much of it.

maybe it was the alcohol intake getting the better of him.

he'd do the same thing over and over again.

—wake up, eat food, go to the favonius headquarters, loiter patrol around, and go have a drink in angel's share.

then around the day he would always hear your voice and his heart would race. he'd think of your favorite things once in awhile. maybe even partake even some food you'd always talk about. then when he went to angel's share, maybe he was hoping that you would be there, you'd be alone and he'd be alone too.

though he knows it was his doing for you not to show yourself again. he'd pray that maybe he could pour out his feelings again to you.

that day came perfectly. when he was out for a missions and entered angel's share. he saw you sitting alone, with your favorite drink in your hand. it was his time

as you take a sip from your favorite drink, you jump because of the voice you know all too well. "mind if i sit here?" blue hair arrogantly crossing your vision. "i'm sorry, this seat is taken." you replied to him and go back to focusing your attention on your drink. kaeya chuckled and said "you're too harsh on me." he sat on the other side of you instead. "y/n, i haven't seen you since—" "since we broke things off, right?" not taking one look at his face at all. "don't be like that. i was just...it wasn't me saying all those things." he had tapped the table, signifying the bartender to make him his favorite drink. your eyes wander at the clock wondering when you can make your exit. "y/n, i'm sorry." kaeya had abruptly said, causing you to look at him. "what, drunk already? cavalry captain?" "i'm sober. definitely." you and him made eye contact for the first time in that night. "kaeya—" "y/n, i'm still in love with you." he never drops his look towards you. "you told me that too last time, what do you think happened?" you go back to your drink, "i dont accept broken promises anymore, kaeya. it's tiring getting hurt." "i know, i'm sorry. i just—don't know how to love properly. but i'll try better. i know i can." "kaeya, you're too late" you look at him with red cheeks. he could tell you were getting too intoxicated, who knows how long you've been taking a 'sip' of that drink of yours. "y/n, i think that's enough." he tries to grab the drink from you, but you try to pull the glass back. he almost has the drink until some other hand pulls it back to you again. you look over to the owner of the hand and your eyes light up with so much energy. you call their name and gave them a hug, "i missed you!!" your arms wrap around their neck. "y/n, who's this?" they asked, and you just told them that kaeya was just an acquaintance. not a friend even. you introduce your still hugged companion to kaeya and had told him that when you were in so much pain, they had been there for you in every step of the way. and now both of you were approaching something more. "i know you're still busy, it's ok. i can handle myself." you tell them, they give you a kiss in reply and walk to the stairs for the they had meeting. kaeya watches you as your eyes follow him. "new friend?" he asks but you don't reply. "y/n, i miss you. i still want to be with you. i'm sorry." he says quickly, with no pauses in between. you swirl your drink with your cup. "kaeya, i'm sorry but while you were pushing me away. i was being pulled by them, they're everything you're not—" "that's why i'll change! i promise—" you look at him, firmly you say "again with your promises. i love them, so much more than how i loved you." with that, kaeya leaves the bar. he goes outside leaving you.

all he could think of was how selfish you were,

but how could you be? he was careless with you

and now you're gone. happy with who you were with,

now who really is the selfish person here but him?

—DILUC

it was the day of his wedding. lots of people attending and you were one of them. it could be as a sign as a 'thank you' because of your decision. but you didn't mind since you were going to the wedding with someone holding your hand now. firmly and will never let go.

but when it got to his vows,

his eyes were on you.

you thought it could be a simple glance but when the high priest asks him "sir diluc? your vows?"

the world stops around you when he runs towards your pew/aisle and pulls you away from your companion,

running to the exit of the cathedral.

the realization hits you when you're just outside the church and you pull your hand back to you.

"what the hell are you doing?" you asked him. "you're at your own wedding and you have a bride so tell me, what the hell are you doing?", diluc inhales and looks back to you. his white suit is everything you've ever imagined if it was you as his bride. "i imagined you there." he says, "what?" "i imagined you there. y/n. i saw my future with you while you were sitting down in that aisle. i wondered when will you stand up and stay beside me. i longed for the moment for i to say my vows to you. every hour, every minute, every second i saw you there. infront of me, with me, i want you. i love you. after everything, i am still in love with you." "diluc. its over. every trace i had of your love is gone and more importantly, we're at your wedding. its your wedding." "i can give you all my love again, i can write more letters, i'll do everything, anything. please." he gets down on one knee, "so please, y/n— —marry me." "no. get up. diluc. the answer is no." "y/n..." he tries to argue with you. "i'm in love with someone who wouldn't waste a perfectly good wedding to someone else just to profess their love to me. i wanted one thing with you diluc, pure love. and even with that, you turned them into ash." he stays with his knee still down. "so no diluc. i will not marry you." you lastly say. you notice the shadow around the corners of the cathedral. you walk to it and already know who was in the shadows. you grab their hands and walk down the stairs of the church. with diluc still on his knee.

maybe before you would've accepted, probably when you were still madly in love with him.

but you realized how there were only some people who'll truly say the three words.

and "i do" will be something you'll only say to the person now holding your hand

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