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usersanon · 3 months

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Please be aware of the user @/saintsugu also known as Ezra.

Past pseudonyms include (but are not limited to: @/aces_high

I never thought that I would have to create a post like this. In my near 12 years on the internet, I never thought I would have to write down the words I am about to type, especially about a fellow fanfic creator, one I used to enjoy before I found out about the type of person he really is. I apologise for the long post, however I want to make sure I am as thorough as possible so I can bring this person to justice.

Before opening the read more/ continuing with this post, please read the trigger warnings. This will deal with heavy topics, ones that make me sick to my stomach. I apologise for all of the censoring in this post as well.

TW: P*DOPHILIA, UNDER*GE, SEXUALIZATION OF EDS AND SH

I would just like to start off by saying how difficult this post is for me to write. I have had to take multiple breaks while typing this out. I have felt disgusted since I first saw the posts on his twitter. Like I need to take a shower and scrub myself clean, however, at the same time I feel like I cannot sit idly by while Ezra still has a platform.

The posts I have seen on his twitter, what he actively endorses is just disgusting and predatory in nature. I have done my best to censor them so as to not continue the spread of such material. As of the time of this post, his twitter is still public.

HIS TWITTER (X) IS CURRENTLY UNDER THE NAME @/ezr_ace

First, I’ll give evidence I have to prove that the twitter account stated above is in fact his. I was wary at first as well, however, I believe this evidence in fact proves that beyond reasonable doubt that the account is his.

The obvious reasoning is as follows: Ezra goes by the pseudonym Ezra currently, and has gone by the pseudonym Ace in the past. Both the twitter account and his tumblr state that he is 21. Both twitter and tumblr themes are the same in nature, featuring manga panels of Suguru edited in the same way.

If you’re familiar with Ezra at all, you would know that they are very close with another user, Flora, also known as @/fyogasm. Previously known as @/pussydrunkfyodor on tumblr. When going through the followers of this twitter account, I noticed someone by the name of Flora following him (one of about 34 followers), with the user @/floratumblr. This account had their tumblr linked in the bio of the profile, and it led straight to Flora’s tumblr. Screen recording is posted below:

UPDATE: since Ezra has been called out, Flora has unfollowed Ezra’s Twitter as well as deleted her account. I can only assume it is to try and dodge the backlash of being associated with him. Here are screenshots proving they are moots/ interacting with each other.

Note: I do not know what this means for the content of Flora’s character. All I can say for certain is that she is close friends with him (to the point they have each others numbers), and that she follows his Twitter. I did not dive deep into her Twitter before she deleted it. But I can say that I do believe she knew the content he was posting about, otherwise she wouldn’t have deleted her Twitter the second he was called out while remaining mutuals with him on tumblr.

UPDATE 1/19/24 1:50 pm: Since creating this post, Flora has reached out and stated that they have broken all contact with Ezra. They state that they are not frequently on twitter, and was completely unaware of the type of content he was posting on the account. They state that the content found on the account has made them feel sick and that they are no longer friends anymore.

Back to the main point, this only adds to the similarities listed above. A close mutual that he has been seen actively talking to on his tumblr also follows him on twitter, endorsing his behavior. This alone was too much for me to ignore. However, one final factor came into play that solidifies that user ezr_ace and user saintsugu are the same Ezra.

He not only posted to his tumblr about hateful anon messages, but also his twitter at the same time. Right after the messages were sent, he tweeted the following, as well as posted the following messages on his tumblr. Screenshots with time stamps posted below:

This for me, confirms that the two accounts are the same. There are simply too many coincidences for me to ignore. I feel that there is no argument about the validity of the accounts, as there are just too many similarities to ignore. Now, I can delve into what the post is really about. The content of the Twitter account.

P*DOPHILLIC ACTIONS AND UNDRE*GE CONTENT.

To put it simply, I was horrified when I first opened the profile to be greeted with Shotacon artwork. Full on artwork of an adult Toji a*saulting a child Gojo. In this artwork, Gojo looks as if he can be no older than 10. Most of the image is censored for obvious reasons, however, part of the screenshot appears in the video above as well. Proving that it cannot have been doctored in any way.

As you can see, the post is tagged with tw sh*ta. For anyone unaware, the definition of Sh*ta is as follows: “Sh*ta is a term used in manga and anime fandoms to indicate sex involving an under*ge boy.” (Fanlore.org) Aka, CP.

It is disgusting to see someone who I once enjoyed, once trusted, interact with literal cp. Drawing or not, the effect of it is still massive. Viewing children (ANYONE UNDER*GE) in a sexual nature is harmful to everyone. It breaches past dark content into something horrible. Something dangerous.

I felt sick seeing someone be as brazen as to repost a picture of a child being a*saulted. To get off on it. It is p*dophilic. That is the only way it can be put.

Further on this, he has written smut of, in his words, “not necessarily under*ge” Suguru in highschool. There is a whole thread on it on his profile, however, I will not be showing it here. The screenshot below describes the nature of the whole post from his own words.

When I first read “not necessarily under*ge”, my first and only question was literally, what the fuck does that mean? Either he is under*ge or not. There is not some fuzzy grey area coating the world between adults and children.

But sure, give him the benefit of the doubt. That does not excuse him liking multiple posts tagged with under*ge content. The most recent being less than an hour ago. Posts censored to the best of my ability below.

These posts all point to the same thing. The disgusting, undeniable truth that this man is attracted to under*ge content. Content depicting minors in sexual scenarios. Content that no member of society should ever consume. He is a p*dophile. For viewing this content of his own accord. For liking it, for reblogging it. For creating it on his own. He is a disgusting person.

FOLLOWING MINORS.

Him interacting with content like that above, consuming it in any capacity at all makes him unsafe to be around. For anyone. Especially minors.

Even though his blog is 18+, even though he preaches that minors should stay away from his blog. He still found himself following a 16 year old. Becoming mutuals with them. The fact this person is 16 is clearly displayed on their blog as well (in their pinned post).

Screenshots shown below. The individual’s user is censored out as, once again, they are a minor and I don’t feel they should have to be wrapped up in this mess.

Once again, Ezra is someone who preaches about minors staying out of adult spaces. Multiple times he has complained on his blog about minors following him and having to block them. You would think he does the same and would be more careful about curating his online spaces, however it he fails to do that.

I don’t believe this can be boiled down to a simple case of missing the age in their bio— this user has their age in their pinned post, as well as their about me. Along with the sexualisation of minors prevalent on his Twitter, it makes me extremely uncomfortable to know that he is following a minor in any capacity. I’m sure it would make anyone.

SEXUALIZING EDS AND SH.

To end the laundry list of posts on his twitter, we have him writing smut glorifying eds, as well as liking posts depicting sh in a sexual light. As always, screenshots are shown below, censored to the best of my ability.

In the post listed above, Suguru is described in a way that is hard to stomach. While it is not nearly as bad as everything else stated above, I feel it is still necessary to include, especially because in this pairing he has often described and implied Suguru to be a minor. There is a line and he has crossed it several times, this is just another example of such. Serving as the cherry on top to further demonstrate his mindset.

Dark content and discussion of these subjects in fiction are not the problem. The disturbing part of this is that Ezra often uses these tropes within his min*r/adult sexual fantasies, and when paired with the sh*ta and under*ge content, leaves a very poor taste in the mouth. It comes across as not only a gross f*tishization, but a gross f*tishization of taking advantage of a minor that way.

A DISCUSSION ON THE LIMITS OF DARK CONTENT.

In this section, I feel that it is important to touch on how dark content plays into all of this. I’d like to expressly state that this is NOT a condemnation of dark content or its consumption.

Dark fiction and dark content are a fine line. It’s a fantastic tool for exploring taboos and emotions or experiences that aren’t often talked about openly. DC creates what is essentially a safe space for exploring things that are not typically done or seen in the real world, with the knowledge that writing or engaging with it does not necessarily mean condoning it. That being said, this callout post is NOT about being anti-dc. Dark content is a literary or artistic tool. Keeping all of this in mind, to actively engage with sh*ta content in which a character is depicted sexually not only as a minor, but as a child, and to be sexually aroused by that image is the definition of p*dophilia. Writing or drawing children and engaging with that content in a sexual capacity is p*dophilia and at the very least, has p*dophilic tendencies. This is not dark content, this is p*dophilia.

It is one thing to write or create dark fiction between adults for the purpose of gratification or exploration of social dynamics and it is entirely another to engage with art of a child engaging in sexual acts with an adult for (seemingly) the intent purpose of sexual gratification. Everyone draws their own line, but it is also important to acknowledge that there are some depictions of taboo subjects that border (if not fully step-into) harmful, p*dophilic content that perpetuates behavior and mental tendencies that truly are dangerous.

To engage with a drawing of a child and a full grown adult in sexual acts for the purpose of sexual gratification is incredibly fucked up. And the fact that minor and adult p*rnography are not just common, but dominating Ezra's twitter page, should be an absolute red flag. It’s okay to acknowledge that dark content is a medium for fiction while also acknowledging that there are some ways of engaging with it that are harmful, especially when it is so glaringly obvious that the content is between a child and an adult (the art I am talking about specifically really is a child. I don’t urge anyone to look at it, but it is gojo depicted as a child of maybe 8 - 10 years old. I’m not using the term child as an umbrella term for minors here).

The problem, stated very plainly, is that the post/s he is engaging with are sexual depictions of a child with the purpose of sexual gratification. That’s the point here. It’s not the dark content, but rather that he is retweeting posts depicting a child of about 8-10 engaged in sexual acts and created for the purpose of sexual gratification.

Once again, this is not a condemnation of dark content. Dark content can be used in so many valuable ways— facing trauma, dealing with taboo subjects, exploring the literary world in a safe and healthy way. As someone who actively consumes dark content, I will be the first to tell you this. However there should always be limits to the types of content produced. Gaining any kind of gratification from looking at a child being a*saulted is disgusting. It is p*dophillic. Especially when he actively engages with minors on his platform.

This is not a conversation of morals— which side is right and wrong. But rather a conversation about the safety of children. This is not a conversation about ageing up as that is not what he is doing. The characters being depicted here are not being aged up, rather are being depicted as minors, or literal children being used for the sexual gratification of adults.

The issue here is a p*dophile. Not dark content. Not anything else.

CONCLUSION.

I’ll be honest, post was extremely hard for me to create. Discovering that someone I once thought was close to me is this kind of person feels disgusting and abhorrent. I honestly wish I never had the displeasure of meeting them in the first place.

Hopefully, by the end of this post you are able to see the kind of person Ezra really is. I could not be silent about this. I knew that the moment all I found all of this out. This post has been very difficult for me to write, but I hope by the end of it some good will come. Some people will be able to avoid interacting with this man.

I believe Ezra needs professional help, and truly hope that he is able to get it some day soon.

Please be careful with who you interact with on the Internet. Adults and minors alike, there are predators everywhere. Please try your best to stay safe in your own online spaces. All of the love in my heart goes out to anyone who has survived child expl*itation. I hope for nothing but the best for you in the future.

Thank you all for taking the time to read this post. I know it is long and triggering for most people. I hope you all have wonderful days and try your best to take care of yourself.

Listed below are some important numbers I would like to bring awareness to before this post is over.

National Child Ab*se Hotline (USA): 1-800-422-4453

National Center for Missing and Exploited Children (USA): 1-800-843-5678

The National Sexual A*sault Hotline (USA): 1-800-656-4673

Childline (UK): 0800-1111

International Child Helpline: 116-111

TLDR: Ezra has a Twitter account where he retweeted artwork of a child gojo being a*saulted by an adult toji. He liked as well as created posts depicting under*ge characters (literally tagged with ‘under*ge’). All while being mutuals with a 16 year old on tumblr.

Tags used to try and spread awareness. I tried to mostly include fandoms that he is in.

UPDATE: lmfao, he has since deleted the retweet of sh*ta gojo after he was called out. Literally proving that it was him.

2K notes · View notes

viennakarma · 5 months

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Everything I Wanted II.

LESTAPPEN X READER (PART 2)

Summary: Your journey to become a Motorsport legend wasn't easy, especially when your path clashed with your greatest rivals, Max Verstappen and Charles Leclerc.

Word count: 8.9k

Tags: Driver reader, mentions of crash, angst, abusive parent, daddy issues, trust issues, character death (not reader), cursing, strong rivalry, misogyny in motorsport, invasive media, aggressive fans, reader suffers with cyberbullying and hate, smut, female reader, +18, unprotected sex, voyeurism, exhibtionism, edging, filthy, porn with plot, queer! everyone, polyamory lestappen, bit of dirty talking, pet names, not beta read

Relationships: Lestappen x Reader

Mentor!Kimi Raikkonen x Reader

Sebastian Vettel, Fernando Alonso, Lewis Hamilton x Platonic!Reader

Notes: this is full of motorsport categories inaccuracies, just go with the vibes please. There are a few inaccuracies regarding other drivers' lives, but they are just to fit the story. This chapter is very angsty and none of it is an attack at the drivers nor their fans and personalities, please.

I know I KNOW, this got out of hand, AGAIN. I promise next part (and hopefully last) is more focused on the romance, and the happy ending reader deserves.

Find me on Twitter!

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

You spent Christmas with your mom, sharing a lot of presents and watching a bunch of stupid Christmas movies. New Year’s was now a tradition to spend with the Raikkonen Family, joined with the closest friends for a little get together. It was a good opportunity to reconnect with Kimi’s kids who missed you a lot during the season.

Charles never contacted you during winter break, which you were sure was the best after that mistake. You hated each other too much and the only thing that could come out of that was toxicity from the both of you. You refused to even acknowledge what had happened and its implications, that wouldn’t and couldn’t mean anything.

During the pre-season testing in Bahrain, you and Charles were back to whatever your relationship was before that one lapse in judgment months before.

Nobody noticed anything.

One day, Fernando pulled you aside for a little chat. You two sat side by side on big moving boxes, sipping on energy drinks.

“There’s something I have been wanting to talk to you about since last year,” he started, seemingly pensive, distant.

“Is everything ok?”

“Yeah, yeah. Remember after we first met when you asked me if I had advice for you regarding your career?” Fernando said, and you remembered.

Right after you had gotten close, you asked him for advice, you always did, especially about racing. But one day, you were chatting about his career, and you asked if had any lessons you should never forget. He had laughed joking about read all your contracts then asking if you were calling him old, but he said if he ever had any advice, he would tell you.

“Yes, have you got my answer yet?”

“Sí, Nena,” he paused, looking deep into your eyes, “enjoy.”

You frowned and he saw the confusion on your face.

“I see much of my younger self in you, you know? The same passion, this fiery desire to win, your goal for the championship, to conquer the world…” Fernando paused, looking up to the clear sky, the sunset coming around, “And I did. But I wish I had enjoyed it more. I should’ve gone to parties, I should’ve visited the countries we went to and tried the food, I should’ve made more friends, I should’ve had more lovers… I was so focused on winning, on getting my hands on that trophy of champion of the world, that I missed out on a lot.”

You felt your eyes tear up, and you wiped it before the tears came down. Putting your hand on his shoulder, you smiled at him.

“It’s such an honor race with you. And an even greater honor to have you as a friend, Nano” you whispered to him, you two laughed as his eyes watered too, and slapping his shoulder you laughed, “don’t make me cry, you old softie!”

You took his advice to your heart.

You went to the parties, you met new people, and that’s how after two entire seasons, you managed to befriend Lando, your teammate. You two had to open your hearts a little bit and meet in the middle. Which proved to be great, the whole team loved the change in your dynamic. You still weren’t besties, but you were close colleagues, and that was great. Everyone noticed the change and it reflected on how you started racing as a team instead of individually.

The car was even better than the year before, and the first race of the season you got a promising win.

That win, Lando’s pestering, and Fernando’s advice was how you ended up in a party after the Bahrain GP. Wearing a skimpy mini dress and 5 tequila shots deep, swaying your hips to the sound of Rihanna. You were dancing and singing with Lando and a few of his friends, loudly screaming the lyrics.

When it was way too hot for you, you grabbed a water bottle and beelined your way out of the crowded dance floor. You found a corner of the VIP section where the AC seemed to be working better, and as you stumbled inside the small space, you ran chest first into someone.

“Sorry,” you said, taking a step back and pressing your back against the cold wall.

“Enjoying your win?” Your head snapped up as you recognised Max’s voice. You had run into him.

Lando had mentioned inviting Max to the party, he had gotten a P2 in the race but you doubted he would go to a party he knew you would attend. You were obviously wrong.

“You know I am,” the victory was so good that nothing could ruin your mood.

“Well, then enjoy it. I’m coming for the win, again.” He warned you but his voice was devoid of anything, just sounded like he was casually telling you about the weather. But you knew that he was implying his championship the year before, rubbing it in your face.

“Don’t be so confident, Max,” you finished your water, smirking at him, “Enjoy the view of my rear!”

You flipped your hair, feeling his eyes on you the whole walk back to the dance floor.

And yet-

Somehow-

You ended up back at that small corner, dancing with your body pressed between Verstappen’s and the wall, his hand holding your jaw firmly, you rolled your hips against him, feeling the way his body responded to yours.

“We can’t-” he said to you, still, his eyes hadn’t left your lips, like he was so oh so tempted.

You rolled your eyes, annoyed. Sober you would never do that, but then, that was a problem for later. Checking to see if anyone was looking at you, you hooked a finger around his waistband and pulled him towards the bathroom.

As soon as the two of you were inside, you locked the door and Max pressed your back against the door, latching his lips to yours in a very desperate open mouthed kiss. You hugged his shoulders, opening your lips to him, his hands went down your sides and he grabbed your ass, pulling you into him. But that wasn’t enough, so he held your thighs and pulled up, carrying you. You locked your legs around his waist, and he stopped the kiss to walk, sitting you on the marble side of the sink, still between your legs, forcing his bulge against your panties, and eliciting a moan from you.

He took a half step back to hike your dress up, palming your cunt over your panties feeling the dampness of it, he tried to press his hand under your panties, but the lacy fabric didn’t leave much space, so he simply tore the bottom of them, exposing you to him. He just ran a finger over your slit, collecting your wetness for a brief moment before pushing a finger into you. Max watched your face with concentration, studying your body’s responses. Your hips shaking at the movement of his finger, and when the second one joined, you got louder. He curled his fingers up, his thumb pressing your clit, and you had to use both hands to hold onto him, your head lolling back against the mirror.

“Take it and shut the fuck up,” he grunted between clenched teeth.

He was pressing your insides so good, the slick sound of his fingers going in and out, his heavy breathing, the loud music outside and his laser focused fingers had you coming against his fingers in minutes. When he noticed you close, cunt spasming against his fingers, he pressed the other hand against your mouth, covering your moans when your toes curled and you orgasmed on his hand.

Max barely let you recover as he opened his jeans and stroked himself twice before pushing his cock into you in one swift move, making you gasp at the sudden intrusion.

“That’s what you wanted, right? Fucking teasing me all night,” He pushed particularly hard, hitting your g-spot, making you see stars, “you’re a fucking menace, y’know that? Fucking insufferable,” then his words became a mumbling of something dutch you couldn’t quite catch anymore with the way his hips snapped against yours, taking all your focus away and turning you into a mess of moaning.

Max fucked like he raced, focused and relentless, brutal. He hugged you with one arm around your waist to keep you in place and the other held you face, tilting your head so he could kiss you, or whatever that mess of saliva, tongues and teeth was. Your orgasm crashed through you unexpectedly, and you only hugged him tighter, pressing your face against his chest, biting into his skin through the fabric of his T-shirt to silence yourself, your teeth sinking into him was enough to send him also over the edge, coming with moans against your ear.

That night, you went home with shaking legs and an incoming headache, as Max left with the scraps of your panties in his pocket and your lipstick stain on his shirt, above his chest.

It was the seventh race of the year, Monaco, and you absolutely hated that specific track since your years of F2. During your two first years in F1 you had awful experiences, the rookie year you DNF and the year prior you had barely managed a P7. You were trying to keep your head up, be hopeful that you could at least try for top 5.

But since you couldn’t catch a fucking break, an old video of your teenage years resurfaced.

You were walking to your first round of interviews when Amanda, your PR manager, started walking by your side.

“There’s something. An old video of a karting competition resurfaced, where Max and Charles pretty much call you stupid,” Amanda was always direct, you could give it to her.

“Let me see the video” you asked, offering your hand for her phone.

“We don’t have time, but everyone will ask you about it. I need you to be the bigger person and act like it isn’t important, yes? They will try to taunt you and get a bad reaction from you, I need you to dismiss everything they throw at you. Agreed?”

You sighed. You knew the stuff from your teens were pretty bad, you rarely badmouthed Max or Charles, but they always felt threatened by you, so there were lots of instances they attacked you. Honestly, you just didn’t want to come out of this victimized. So as you entered the first round of interviews, you decided you were going to downplay anything they asked you.

“Y/N, have you seen the footage of you, Max and Charles from your teenage years that resurfaced recently?”

“No, uh, I haven’t.”

Someone pushed an iPad in your hands because of course, they wanted a live reaction from you. You pressed play, reading the subtitles someone put on the video. It was an amateur recording like a post race interview made by another teenage guy. First as Max walked out of the track, the guy asked what he thought of your win.

“It was luck, she’s not bright enough to think of a strategy,” Max said, walking away, clearly pissed having lost to you.

There was a cut and the camera was turned on again when Charles walked toward the guy asking the question. He repeated exactly the same question he had asked Max.

“Y/N, I don’t worry about her long term. She’s not going very far in this sport anyway,” Charles shrugged, seemingly unbothered.

As the video cut again, it showed your face, you remembered when that was. You were 14, and your dad had dropped you a few months earlier, so you were working your ass off balancing school, work and karting.

“Hey, Y/N. What do you think of your result today?”

“Uh, I tried a new strategy I learned earlier this week, thankfully it worked in my favor,” teen-You dried your forehead with your coat’s sleeve.

“What are your plans for this competition?”

“Well, I hope to be good enough to get into F4 next year, and work my way up into Formula 1,” you smiled softly and walked away after a quick bye.

The video ended and you still spent a few seconds staring at the black screen of the iPad. This interview didn’t come to your mind in more than a decade, but it was nice seeing how you made your 14-year-old dream come true.

“So, what do you say?” The reporter extended his mic to you.

“I guess I proved them wrong, right?” You giggled a little, “don’t take it to heart, really. We were all hormonal teenagers, I’m sure if someone digs, they will find a video of me saying the same stuff about them,” you shrugged, despite that being a lie, sounded dismissive enough.

“So it doesn’t upset you?” The reporter insisted, and you knew he wanted a scandal you weren’t willing to give.

“Of course not. I’ve always known my worth, and I’m P1 in the driver’s championship as of right now. So I don’t really care.”

The interviewers soon let the video go, when they realized you didn’t care about it. You weren’t sure if anyone would also approach Charles or Max with questions about the same video, but you couldn’t care less, you wanted to avoid drama for the time being so you could focus on the championship instead of this bullshit.

On the morning of qualifying, you were in your room, trying to meditate and clear your mind, when a knock interrupted you.

“Guys, I asked for twenty minutes so I could-” you stop yourself when you realize it isn’t anyone from your team, but it’s Max and Charles, “what are you doing here?”

“We came to apologize about the video,” Max started.

“Did your PR teams send you here?” You looked around, trying to catch a camera or even a phone recording.

“No uh, we realized we were very immature with you, and this video is just proof of how silly that was,” Charles sighed, seemingly embarrassed.

“You don’t need to apologize, I mean- the two of you really had it out for me, you called me dumb a lot,” you pointed to Max, then Charles, “and you called me ugly countless times. I don’t know why it would make any difference now.”

You were just so used to being defensive, to protect yourself from hatred you found it hard to believe them, to give them a chance to apologize because you couldn’t believe it to be genuine.

“Even if you don’t take it, or believe it, I would like to apologize for that behavior. I was just a stupid kid.” Max looked deep into your eyes, which could’ve made you uncomfortable if he didn’t seem so honest.

“I’m really sorry, Y/N. It was too idiotic to be like that to you, growing up. You were just a kid too.” Charles added.

You understood where that apology came from, it was stupid and embarrassing for all three of you this teenage rivalry when you all were barely mid racers back in the day. Sighing, you looked around, dropping your façade for a second, allowing yourself to display the same honesty they showed you.

It was hard and required some sort of deprogramming because you could only see them as rivals, like your dad had whispered in your brain so many times before, like their actions towards you had cemented dad’s words. They had said things that were on your mind for so long, that had made you defensive and deflective.

“Look, don’t worry about it. Whatever happened back then, it’s water under the bridge,” You shifted on your feet. As they started walking away, you added “this doesn’t mean we’re friends.”

They only nodded before leaving. Your routine went back to the same, and as the next scandal went on, people forgot about the silly video, but a very specific part of the fans started shipping you and both your rivals.

The rivalry never died down though.

Then, out of nowhere, Sebastian pulled you and Lewis aside to a conversation. Then he told you that he was going to retire by the end of the season. It was the first time the two of them saw you cry, and Sebastian hugged you tight, shushing your crying softly.

“I’m so sorry, I’m sorry,” he whispered, petting your head.

“No, don’t apologize,” you let him go, drying your face, “I have listened to you talking countless times about how you missed the kids. Don’t apologize for choosing to be a great dad. I know Hanna and the kiddos will be ecstatic.”

“You two are my closest friends here, that’s why I wanted to tell you first, before my announcement.”

“Thank you, Seb,” you said, eyes still watering, “I’m going to miss having you around.”

“Thank you for telling us beforehand,” Lewis said, also visibly emotional.

The season was writing itself to be just as close as the year prior, but now you were slightly better at keeping the lead most.

That is until Zandvoort. This GP was always a nightmare to you, because it was full of Max’s fans, and they absolutely hated you for being his rival. You had been booed when you were on the podium the year before, so now, you and Amanda decided it was best to keep your head down during the whole week. Not out of shame, but more of a matter of safety, you didn’t know how far the crowd could go in antagonizing you. When you were booed the other year, Max had said it was part of the sport and dismissed the conversation.

The morning of free practice, you went into the paddock very low-key and kept to yourself. You arrived with a little cup of coffee and got mentally ready for a hostile environment the whole weekend. That, until you spotted a small group of people dressed with your color and wearing your number, waving wildly to you.

In a spur of the moment decision, you went there, getting close to the barrier to sign a few caps and take a few selfies. In retrospect, you knew you shouldn’t have done that, especially with only two bodyguards accompanying you.

You were finishing chatting with your fans when you felt something heavy hit the side of your head and the impact made you stumble backwards, you were confused as you heard the screams and felt one of the bodyguards pull you back, as the other jumped the barrier and started running. You patted your temple and something wet and sticky was dripping down the side of your face. You stared at the small group of fans who were looking at you horrified. Staring at the hand, you saw the red staining your fingers, and as the bodyguard kept pulling you away to somewhere safer, the thing flowed even more and got into your left eye.

You wondered if it was blood as you touched your temple but felt nothing, not a gash nor small cut. You covered your left eye as it started to sting from what you supposed smelt like paint.

“Hey, hey, what happened? You’re bleeding!” Max jogged up to you.

“Not blood, just paint” you muttered, trying to use your coat to clean your face.

“Someone threw a paint ball at her,” the bodyguard said.

“Fuck, it’s burning!” You exclaimed, feeling tears in your left eye.

“Come here, the RB hospitality is close,” Max said, holding your wrist, he stopped shortly pointing to your bodyguard, “and you, sort this and find the person who did it.”

You let yourself be taken by Max into the RB territory, the burning so annoying that you rather take whatever solution he was thinking of. He held your waist and placed you sitting on a sink, and then you felt water streaming down your face.

“Stay still,” Max commanded, holding a hose over your head, pouring water down your face, “now blink slowly, let the water wash it,” his voice soft as you did what he told you to. Slowly but surely, it washed the paint away, relieving your left eye from the stinging. Max held the hose up and held your chin, tilting your head up so he could check your eye, still letting the water stream down your face.

You took a few minutes, breathing and regulating your heartbeat from that scare, trying to come back to normal and understand fully what was going on. From what you gathered, you were chatting with fans when someone else came and threw something with paint at you.

“How does it feel?”

“It’s better, already stopped burning,” you told him, feeling your heart miss a beat at the close proximity you found yourself to him. You were sitting on a sink, Max standing between your legs pretty much like you two had done months before for entirely different reasons.

“Open your eye, let me see,” he asked, and you tried to blink it open, “can you see?”

“It’s a little blurry but I believe it will get better,” you explained, and he didn’t let go of your chin. Suddenly, he covered your right eye with the other hand, leaving you only with your left eye sight.

“How many fingers am I putting up?” He showed it to your left eye. The vision was a bit blurry but you still could make out the shapes very clearly.

“Four, Max. It’s just a little bit blurry, probably will get better in a few minutes” you sounded annoyed, you tried to move but he pressed a hand against your waist, keeping you in place.

“Now, what happened?” He asked finally. You ignored the proximity, and the hand still on your body.

“We’re in Zandvoort, that’s what happened,” you shrugged, really annoyed about it.

“What do you mean?” He was visibly confused. You scoffed because you knew it wasn’t something he didn’t know, since the year before he has dismissed the importance of how hostile people were to you.

“We’re massively surrounded by your fans, Max.”

“I don’t understand.”

“They hate me because you hate me, and they think because you hate me they’re justified in their hostility towards me,” You explained, with a sigh, you pushed away from Max, “this GP has been like this for me ever since Rookie year.”

“I don’t hate you,” he said, brows furrowed.

“You do. And they do too,” you pointed down at the paint that had also stained your shirt as proof.

“I don’t,” he insisted and you rolled your eyes, jumping off the sink, but he didn’t give you space, which made you stand chest to chest with him, “I promise.”

You stared at him, breathless. That wasn’t part of the game you played, being kind, sounding worried and making promises. None of that was part of this whole rivalry. Pushing his chest, you tried getting away but he caged you against the sink, body flush against yours.

“Do you believe me?” He asked and your eyes fell to his lips, and you allowed yourself to remember the desperate and chaotic kisses you had shared in a dimly lit bathroom, “I don’t support any of this behavior.”

You heard voices and steps approaching, which made you finally push him away, walking towards the door. Whatever little magic had been happening between those walls was undone the moment you remembered none of that would’ve happened if he had politely put a stop to it earlier.

“It’s part of the sport and I have to deal with it, right?” You returned the very same words he had said about you when you were booed by the crowd the year prior.

As you opened the door, you were faced with Sebastian. He stopped, taking you in and then pulling you in a hug.

“Are you ok? We just heard what happened!” He murmured, guiding you out of the bathroom. He held your shoulders and looked at your face, checking how your left eye was still a little red, “we should take you to see a doctor, come on.”

Lewis soon arrived at the entrance of the RBR station, he warned about the reporters crowding outside, waiting for a glimpse of you after the attack. The British man gave you a Mercedes coat so you put it over your head and avoid the cameras waiting outside. With the bodyguards and both Lewis and Sebastian leading you away, you ended up at the medical center, and after a quick examination, the doctor gave you eye drops to put throughout the day.

Your Principal suggested you sit the FP1 out, letting the reserve driver take your place while you recovered. By the middle of FP1, your eyesight was 100% and you went to get ready for FP2. The whole day you felt like everyone was being extra careful, tiptoeing around you. You hated feeling like you were being pitied, so when the inevitable round of interviews came, you knew what you had to do.

“We heard about your incident earlier today, how are you feeling about it?” Someone asked.

“I’m pretty upset, to be honest. Formula 1 is a sport loved around the whole world, and the paddock overall is supposed to be a safe place not only for the fans, but also the workers and drivers. What happened today is unacceptable and could’ve been much worse. I’m voicing my dissatisfaction and I intend to, through legal means, take this complaint to the FIA.”

Later that night, as you laid awake on your bed, scrolling through the repercussions of the day, you stopped when you saw a snippet of Max's interview.

“What happened today was dangerous and unacceptable, I don’t support this behavior and I stand with Y/N,” that was all he said, but Max usually was a man of few words, always knowing when it was enough.

You knew he should’ve voiced that much earlier in your career, specifically after the booing the year before, but still- He also could have opted to not say anything at all, and he didn’t.

Amanda also sent you the news that the fan who had attacked you was found and banned for life from Formula 1.

After calling Sebastian, you managed to get ahold of Max’s phone number and texted him a simple message.

Thank you. Twice. - Lioness

The text went to read almost immediately, and the three dots appeared from his side of the screen. You wait, and wait, and wait. And then the dots disappeared, and an answer never came.

After a solid P2 that weekend in Zandvoort, you went home for the summer break. You and your mom had planned to go to Monaco for a little while since you were planning on buying a place there. From there, you and your mom would go all around the French Riviera to enjoy the sea and spend a few days in a spa resort. Then, you would go back home and relax before going to Ibiza for a weekend to meet Lando and his friends to enjoy some partying.

Everything went according to plan, but one day when you came back home after the trip to the French Riviera, you found your mom passed out on the living room floor.

You called an ambulance, quickly taking her into the hospital. Everything was a blur, the tests and scans, your mom still unconscious on a hospital bed, and the results. The results that pulled the floor from under your feet.

Your brain couldn’t fully compute what was said. Cancer Stage 4. Surgery. Palliative care.

The world was muted around you as you sat on a chair in the waiting room, hands shaking when you tried to understand what was happening. You somehow ended up calling the one other person you trust.

“Y/N? What happened?”

“I don’t understand- she just- she just passed out and I thought- but- but they said- palliative care” you try to come up with words.

“Talk to me. Are you sick?” Kimi’s voice is so focused and a little soothing.

“It’s mom”

“Send your location, I’m going there,” that’s all he said.

Waiting for Kimi gave you some sense of purpose, because it’s Kimi. He could fix anything. He fixed your life when you were 14, he can do it again. He would get there and find a way to help. Your mind got so clouded when the word cancer was thrown in the conversation, that you probably missed the part about treatments and- and surgery and stuff.

In your mother’s room there was a comfortable couch where you tried to settle to sleep, but you only spent countless hours awake. You hoped to see the doctor again to try and get him to explain everything for a second time.

You wished you were smart and quick, but no, you just sat there holding onto the hope that Kimi had a way to fix this.

Kimi arrived early the next morning, knocking on the door before entering. You stood up, hugging him tight.

“What happened?”

“It’s pancreatic cancer, they said. We need to see more about surgery and- and treatments.”

You and Kimi found the doctor, who explained again, and in that moment you finally understood what he meant the first time around. She was in a late stage of pancreatic cancer, which was usually a very difficult illness to find before it is too late, due to the placement of the organ in the body and late symptoms. The only options were either to try a very risky surgery and chemo so she could extend her life for around 8 months to a year. Or she could go home to live her last few months the way she wanted.

You begged and cried and bribed and offered every single solution your brain could muster to try and save her. Kimi held you when you fell to the floor, sobbing.

When your mom woke up and you and Kimi told her the diagnosis, she cried too, sobbing in your arms as you tried to hold it together for her sake. It took a couple of days for her to choose to go home. The two of you spent the last days of summer break traveling around the world a bit more, visiting temples and statues, and seeing nature and everything good the world had to offer, going to places motorsport hadn’t taken you to.

Your mom went to every race week from there on, even when she felt especially weak, even when you had to hire a full time medical team for her.

Your focus on the season was solely on the moment between entering the car and leaving the car. You still managed to race like you’ve done before, calm and controlled, with the help of your engineers and team, you still could put the car where you wanted it, paving your way for a solid world championship that year. It was like your brain was seeing racing as the one thing in your life you had full control over, so sometimes you even felt like you and the car were one.

You didn’t tell anyone about her. Though every driver noticed how distant you were, even Charles and Max and the ones that weren’t very close to you noticed how you were only fulfilling your obligations and leaving, you weren’t even celebrating your wins, leaving the fastest you could after a race.

The Singapore GP was tough for you, having to leave your mom home alone with the medical staff and a couple of friends from her book club, since she wasn’t strong enough to travel anymore. Your attention was failing all throughout media day and free practices. Qualifying was shit compared to your performance the rest of the season.

In Q3 you did a reasonable sector 1 and 2 but you messed up sector 3 completely. It was a complete accident when you got in the way of a Ferrari when he was doing his fast lap, and you ended up messing his qualy too. Jace let you know it was none other than Charles Leclerc, who was setting the pace for a pole position. Out of 19 drivers, you had to ruin his lap. In the end, Max got pole, Charles qualified P3 and you qualified P5.

You went through the motions during the post qualifying press. You were about to leave after debriefing, when Charles Leclerc found you on the way to the parking lot. You pulled your coat tighter around yourself protectively as he walked up to you. You were hoping to escape his fury at least until after the race the next day. Before he could even get a word in, you started.

“Look, I know I messed up your pole. I know you won’t believe me, but it wasn’t intentional. I really thought there was no one doing fast laps on the track, I thought everyone was either still doing out laps or in the pits, so when you-”

“Calm down, breathe,” he interrupted you, “I’m not here to fight.”

“No?” You frowned, confused with the kindness in his eyes.

“We know you’re going through something, and I’m sure I’m the last person you want to hear this from, but you’re not alone. And you should really consider talking with someone on the grid. They’re all- we’re all worried about you.”

The words felt alien coming from his mouth, but the gentleness was so comforting you felt a lump in your throat.

“Why do you think I’m not ok?” You muttered trying to sound confident, but your voice failed, betraying you.

“You’re skinny and you look sleep deprived for a few weeks now,” Charles said directly.

“Damn, thanks.”

“I don’t mean it like that, you know it,” he paused, putting both hands on his pockets, “have you been eating?” Your lack of response made him press further, “have you eaten today?”

You pressed your lips together, not wanting to answer that.

“Let’s go, I’ll drive you to the hotel, we’ll stop on the way to grab some food,” Charles gestured to his car, a few meters away. You stood there, shocked as he started walking away, then he stopped looking over his shoulder, “come on, I don’t have all the time in the world.”

As you sat in his Ferrari, Charles put music on and you didn’t do much talking, but it was tranquil. He called the restaurant to order take out on the way, and 30 minutes later he dropped you off at the hotel with a bag full of food.

“Thank you, Charles.” You whispered before leaving the car.

You ate the food while on a video call with your mom.

You recovered well during the race, finishing P2, behind Max and ahead of Charles.

Your mom passed away a few days after the Japanese Grand Prix, the one you had won and dedicated it to her from the top step of the podium, even if she wasn’t there, just watching from home. You went home and stayed with her, holding her hands and hugging her as much as you could.

Some part of you knew she was somehow fighting, because she had promised you the year before she would be there when you became world champion. You could see she was hoping to make it to the end of the season, but you also knew she wouldn’t, and you rather she didn’t have to endure any more pain just for your sake.

“You don’t need to fight anymore, ma,” you whispered before she went to sleep, “you raised a strong woman, too. I will see you on the other side, ok? You can rest now, I love you.”

“I’m so proud of you, honey. I love you to the moon and back.”

You made it through her small funeral, following what she had written down before passing. An intimate funeral, full of flowers and a toast to her life. You cried the whole time, with Kimi and Minttu taking turns at comforting you as they could. Coming back to an empty home smelling of cleaning products made you almost lose your mind, and the sight of you in such despair was enough for Kimi to convince you to stay with them until you had to travel for the next race, in almost seven days.

The days passed in a crying blur, you let part of your team know about your mom’s passing. Only Amanda, Jace and your Principal. Jace tried to convince you to take a break and not go to the next race in Austin, but you quickly shut it off. Not only because racing was the one thing keeping you sane amidst the chaos, but because you were so close to the championship, and it was still close competition with Max and Charles, so you couldn’t afford to lose a race and the points that could come with it.

You had to honor your mom in some way.

That’s how you ended up on a plane to Austin with Kimi and Amanda. You knew Kimi had convinced you to let him go because he was sure you’d have a mental breakdown anytime along the weekend, but deep down you appreciated the company. Arriving there, Jace was the first to hug you and whisper his condolences, as well as your TP too.

You survived the entire weekend without breaking down crying in public, but that was your worst race in a few months, the first time out of a podium since Spa. You ended up P5, which luckily wasn’t too bad because Max finished P4 which you were grateful for as he was the one who was P2 in the driver’s championship close behind you.

After that week, you packed your stuff and moved to the new condo in Monaco you had bought during summer break. Despite loving your mom to pieces, you couldn’t manage to live alone in the house you bought for her a couple of years before, it was lonely and it hit you with overwhelming waves of sadness all the time. You distracted yourself a lot with buying furniture and decorations for the new place, and discovering Monte Carlo in a whole new way. The one comfort in all that, was knowing your mom wasn’t suffering anymore.

Then you went straight to Mexico for the next Grand Prix, this time, Kimi left you because he had to come home to Minttu and the kids. Amanda had been such a support for you, that you knew you had to give her something special for the holidays, out of gratitude.

Everything was going as expected until the press conference. You were there with Charles, Max, Sebastian and Lando. You suspected they were putting you always in the same group as Max and Charles because, as the season nearing the end, only three races left, they were your close competition.

While someone asked something of Charles, you were whispering with Sebastian, chatting about Mexican foods you wanted to try after the race. Then, something bizarre happened, and phones started to ping all around the room, between reporters, cameras and everyone else started checking their phones. It seemed like something out of a black mirror nightmare.

You reached for your phone but then remembered you left it to charge in your room.

“This question is for Y/N,” a reporter asked, reading something from his phone, “there’s a new article that just came out saying your mom passed away a couple of weeks ago, is that true?”

Your blood ran cold, and every sound felt like it was muted inside the room. Wide eyed, you searched for Amanda, who was somewhere on the opposite side of the room, and when you found her, she was pale. Then, there was a cacophony of voices and cameras and questions, that made you suddenly overwhelmed.

Swallowing, trying to reassess, you found Sebastian already standing, holding your shoulders. Looking around you noticed how the other three drivers had stood up, making some sort of shield around you, protecting you from the cameras and reporters swarming around.

“We can go, ok? Come on,” Sebastian was saying when Amanda caught up to you, leaning beside Sebastian.

“We can leave, right now,” she said, holding your hand.

Still a little confused, you nodded and let them both guide you back to your room.

“I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry for your loss,” Sebastian hugged you, running his hands on your back for comfort.

“How- how did they find out?” You ask Amanda.

“An article came out, I’m not sure. Someone was probably digging into your life, but don’t worry, I put the team on it already.”

“How do- how we diffuse this? How do we proceed? We need to address this, right?” You started blabbering, trying to wrap your head around everything.

“That was very disrespectful of them to ask like that!” Sebastian exclaimed, making you two jolt.

“We’ll do whatever you’re comfortable with. Do you want me to release a note asking for privacy?” Amanda suggested.

“Can I write something and then run it by you?” You asked, she only nodded.

After a moment, both Amanda and Seb left you alone as you typed a note on your phone. You rewrote and deleted a few times before settling on something heartfelt and respectful but also, calling out the invasion of privacy.

My mom passed away a few days ago after battling with cancer for the past few months.

She had requested of me to keep it a secret until after the season was over, so I could mourn her without the weight of racing over my shoulders.

But obviously someone went digging and disrespected not only one of her last wishes but also disrespected my grief and my right to privacy. I love my mom but I’ll not be answering any more questions about her illness or death, please respect me and respect her memory.

All the love, Y/N

Nobody asked anything over the weekend, but again, it felt like everyone was tiptoeing around you. As soon as you first saw Nano the next day, he held you tight for almost a minute whispering his condolences, and it made you almost cry again. Lewis also spared you a hug, saying if you ever needed anything, to contact him.

You survived that weekend, and decided to go straight to Brazil for the next GP instead of going back to Monaco. In São Paulo you mostly slept your worries and fears away. You had promised yourself to try and focus on the season only, to make your dream come true, to fulfill your mom’s promise in some way.

With Ferrari’s bad strategy in Mexico, they had ruined Charles’ chance at the championship. Now your only competition was Max and the Red Bull rocketship.

You rewatched the race a couple of times as you usually did, to try and catch any mistakes you or your team may have made, to fix it for the next one. But also to try and notice any weaknesses of your rivals, if it was something you could use in your own favor.

You noticed right away in the FP1 that your car wasn’t adhering to the track, you were losing balance and needed more force than usual to keep yourself in place. By FP2, you managed to control your car better, but that caused your tyres to wear off way more quickly.

Quali was one of the shittiest you’ve ever done in your career, taking you out in Q2 for the first time that year, placing you for a start at P12.

“Listen, we’ll do better tomorrow, ok?” Jace told you as soon as you entered the garage, seeing Max still out with a shot at pole position.

“Give me a few minutes to unwind, please,” you asked, dropping your helmet, balaclava and gloves at a nearby table.

You went straight to your room, searching for your phone. Immediately calling Kimi, you waited for him to pick up.

“I watched it,” he said first and foremost.

“If I do bad in the race tomorrow, and Max does well, then I’m gonna lose the championship, Kimi,” saying that out loud made you shiver in horror, “FUCK!” You screamed, kicking a chair.

“First of all, even if you did bad tomorrow, you’d still have a chance to fight for the championship in Abu Dhabi. You know that,” Kimi warned you as if he was scolding a little kid, “second of all, I never taught you this loser mindset. You’ll have to find a way to work around the problems in your car tomorrow.”

“Shit, I’m so fucked! How? How could I even-”

“Remember when I first met you? Your kart was with almost this same problem, yeah? Remember you got P2? You went ahead and fixed it. That’s what I need you to do tomorrow, don’t focus on what you can’t do, only focus on what you can do.”

“I’ll try my best.”

“No trying. Do it.”

After spending the entire night crafting plan A, B, C and Z with you strategists and engineers, you barely got any sleep, but you forced yourself to rest. In the morning, you went to the track early to meet with your team again, to run your strategies one more time, when you had an idea. You’d still follow the plans you had carefully crafted with the team, but you decided to make a Plan Star, as you had called. Interlagos didn’t have any safety car in the last two years, so it was dangerous to fully count on one. But your plan star consisted in the case of a safety car in this one specific window of laps, you’d go to the pits for hards, counting on everyone else being on old softs or mediums at that specific point in the race. But for it to work, you had to be the first of the front field to go in.

As the lights went out and you accelerated, you got already three positions up, landing in P9, and luckily, the points zone. Jace was worried in your ears, talking about the car and the tyres management. With controlled calm and Kimi’s voice in your head, you managed a few more positions in the first 14 laps, landing P7. You lost a bit of time there, since Nando was P6 and everyone knew how tough it always is to overtake him. But you eventually managed to get the position. Unfortunately, it was the moment you had to go to your first pitstop. Due to the problems in your car wearing off your tyres, you would have to go for a two-stop, which ended up costing you three positions again. But you were patient and you were rewarded when the other cars had to pit, which gave you back the four places you had lost.

The race you went on and you barely moved up or down from your P5, but you managed to concentrate.

Jace, on the other hand was sounding more and more worried about your second pit stop, about the difficulty in get closer to P4, about the P6 trying to enter DRS zone behind you, with your tyres wearing off, with the-

“Jace, I love you but please shut the fuck up, I know what to do,” you were praying for a miracle when suddenly, there was a yellow flag, and the safety car went out during the perfect window of laps, “fuck, Jace, this is plan star.”

“Copy,” he paused, his voice sounding secure, “Box, box.”

You changed into hards, no one else went to the pits, and the race restarted after three more laps. The safety car had closed the gap between you and the P4, which made you overtake him easily.

Jace was still keeping quiet to help your concentration, he only interrupted to warn you about overheating your tyres, and your velocity per lap compared to the next position. You started overtaking like a madwoman as much as your tyres allowed.

“That’s P1, Lioness,” Jace told you.

“Copy that.” You said with your voice shaken.

As you managed your P1, you went back to be aware of your surroundings, seeing a Red Bull right behind you, trying to overtake but you managed to hold position.

When you took the checkered flag, you sighed with relief, Kimi was right.

“Congratulations, Y/N! That’s a brilliant, brilliant win!” Jace’s voice was sounding shaken too.

“You’re crying, Jace?” You laughed softly.

“It’s an honor to tell you that you, Y/N Y/L/N, are a Formula 1 world champion!” Jace shouts, and behind him you can hear more people screaming.

“What? Jace you’re fucking with me!”

“No, Lioness, you’re the 2022 champion of the world!”

“But- but how? There’s one race left? And Max was right behind me!”

“No, Verstappen DNFed during that one yellow flag. Behind you was Perez.”

You made the calculations quickly in your head. Max was P2 in the championship, but this DNF meant no points, and even if he managed to win the last race in Abu Dhabi, he wouldn’t be able to equal you in points. So-

“OH MY GOD, oh my god!” You screamed your lungs out, feeling the tears streaming down into your balaclava, “Fuck yes! I’m Formula 1 World Champion! Thank you, thank you so much guys! Jace, holy shit, I’m the champion!”

“You’re the champion!” Jace confirmed.

You felt joy in a way you hadn’t felt in a long, long time, as you stopped your car on the number one spot. Still a little dizzy from the thrill, you left the car, going straight to your team, heavily waiting for you. They all hugged you, hitting your helmet, saying congratulations and everything. You took a moment to hug Jace and Amanda, who had been of great support throughout the year.

After getting weighted and being congratulated by the other two on the podium, Perez and Hamilton, the latter hugging you tight as he took you off the floor, you drank water as you waited for the post race interview with Nico Rosberg.

You were giddy, barely holding yourself together with how happy you were feeling, how you wanted to hold the trophy, how grateful you were and more importantly, how you felt a great weight being lifted off your shoulders.

“Y/N, congratulations on becoming a World Champion! I have to say, as a girl dad, it is great to see you become the first woman ever to win this title. How do you feel? What do you want to say?” Nico offered, with a kind smile.

“To be honest, I can barely contain myself. It’s such an honor to be here and be the world champion. I look at the past and see my younger self who never thought would make it to Formula 1. It’s such a dream come true, after this year’s hardships, I’m glad to achieve the greatest dream of them all!” You said, kinda quickly, rambling as you tried to put into words all the emotions mixed with the happiness, “I’m sorry, I know I’m taking up all your time, I just want to dedicated this win, and this championship to three people who saved my life: Kimi, thank you for being the salvation of my career when we first met; And my mom, who’s not here anymore, thank you for being the light in my darkest days. And lastly, I want to thank myself for working my ass off and never giving up.”

You muttered a thank you as Nico only laughed at your rambling. Before you moved to the cooldown, you grabbed the mic back again.

“May I add one last thing?” You asked for Nico, who only nodded, pointing to the camera again, “This is to my father: I made it, you asshole.”

You wanted to send the middle finger too, but you knew you couldn’t because of the FIA’s guidelines, and you were already risking a penalty for cursing on live TV. In the cooldown room, you sat beside Lewis, watching a few highlights of the race on the screen. It showed a couple of your overtakes.

“Damn, you overtook like crazy,” Lewis muttered, seemingly amazed.

“I pulled a Lewis Hamilton in Interlagos last year,” you joked, and he laughed.

That podium felt like the culmination of everything you had worked for your whole life, felt like recovering your love for the sport for what it was, for the fast cars and the adrenaline. Being on that podium in Brazil as a World Champion shifted something inside you forever. During your anthem, you laughed, and when you got the trophy, you cried, pointing the trophy to the sunny sky with a silent prayer to your mom. You barely noticed, but you felt the champagne raining on you, and opened your arms to shower in it. Putting the trophy down, you splashed the other bottle, laughing and wetting everyone that was close to you, Lewis, Checo, Jace, who had gone up representing the team.

When the celebration ended, you stayed behind a little more, watching the crowd from the podium, and they started chanting. It took you a few seconds to realize they were chanting your name.

You raised your trophy at them, and they cheered even louder. Then you pointed it to the sky again.

“Look, ma, I made it” you whispered to yourself, feeling the tears streaming down your face.

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lqvesoph · 6 months

Text

Is it over now - LN4

lando norris x fem!reader

summary: your situationship with lando ended 10 months ago… or did it? based on taylor swift’s "is it over now"

warnings: toxic behavior, cheating, smut, p in v, dirty talk, handjob, fingering, edging, overstimulation, multiple orgasms, praise (with slight degradation)

a/n: you have no idea how long it took me to finish this and idk the word count but its long and filthy. Also this gif does things to me… just the way he looked that day🤌🏻 the curls the beard the cheekbones

masterlist | taglist

You knew he was gone. He left exactly 113 minutes ago. His flight had taken off 44 minutes ago. Angrily you turned around in your bed, kicking off the blanket and staring at the blank spot next to you where only three hours ago, Lando’s curly head had laid.

Since then you slept with each other. Again. And had a terrible screaming match. Again.

You knew it was for the better to let him go, you were toxic, your relationship, if you can call it that, had been from the very start two years ago when you drunkenly slept with each other after a celebration party.

Since then it’s been one hell of a ride. Neither of you were very good at the whole relationship and communication thing, so naturally your relationship was based on an endless circle of being somehow happy, until one of you screwed up, you fought, left and ended up in each others bed minimum three days later.

Some might say this behavior exhausts but for the two of you it was what made things exciting and addicting.

His touch, his lips, his body, HE was addictive.

But since the last time you broke up, things had changed. Lando had gotten a new girlfriend, something that made you mad as hell.

He knocked on your door last night, storming in and pinning you to the wall before violently attacking your lips with his.

But that wasn’t what made you mad, this was a rather regular occurrence any time one of you got a new partner. What made you mad was that when he woke up the next morning he didn’t stay like he usually would. He jumped out of bed, calling the previous night a 'mistake' and something that 'shouldn’t have happened'. On top of that he blamed you.

Naturally that resulted in your neighbors, once again, hearing a thirty minute screaming match which ended in you kicking Lando out of your door with the words "Don‘t ever call me or knock on my door again, especially not when you realize she can’t give you what you want!!" "I promise I won’t!!" "Oh you are a lying traitor!!".

You hated that even though he was gone for good now, he still wouldn’t leave your mind.

*~*~*~*~*~*

Fast forward to almost 10 months later. Mason, your very nice colleague picked you up from your office. You met on one of your threehundreds of awkward blind dates your friend had arranged, finding out that you actually worked for the same company. However that didn’t make the date any less awkward, because you mostly talked about work. But at least you kind of found a good friend now. You haven’t spoken to Lando since that night. To be perfectly honest, you didn’t think he actually wouldn’t come back.

"Hey, ready for that coffee?", he smiled.

You grabbed your bag and joined Mason. Together you walked to the cafe you‘ve been going to ever since the first time. You noticed he was a bit nervous for some reason, but you didn’t dare ask why, deep down you didn’t care but you wouldn’t admit that to yourself of anyone.

"Two latte‘s to go, please", Mason placed your order. While you waited you pulled out your phone to check some new messages from your friends.

"Lando Norris spotted with yet another model", Mason read the most recent headline when he opened twitter. "Can you believe that guy, huh?", he huffed.

"I bet she’s got blue eyes", you huffed and shook your head when Mason showed you a picture of the blonde girl with blue eyes who basically looked like your clone. "Predictable." "What?", Mason asked confused. "Oh nothing, I happen to know all his girls literally look the same", you fake smiled but thankfully Mason didn’t notice. For some reason he didn’t know about Lando and you when you met and you were rather happy about keeping it that way.

Sure Lando and you never paraded each other around on Instagram, you never actually were together long enough to feel comfortable with announcing your situationship, but you have been spotted together multiple times in the paddock or at parties.

Mason didn’t need to know about the boy who still kept you up some nights.

Your coffees were placed in front of you, making you look up and hesitate for a second. "Here you go", the waiter smiled and for a few seconds you saw Lando in front of you.

The dark brown curls, the green eyes and lord that smile, it reminded you of him.

"Thanks", Mason replied on your part and grabbed the coffees. "You good?", he asked. You simply nodded, still a little in your thoughts.

"Okay good because I’ve been wanting to ask you something", he said, glancing to you. "Hmm?"

"We‘ve been going on these take out coffee dates for almost 10 months now, and I remember how beautiful our first one was, the blind date. So I’ve been wondering, would you like to be my girlfriend?", Mason asked, glancing down at you to catch your reaction.

You looked at him with a blank face and simply nodded. "Uh-hmm", you muttered, your mind still some place elsewhere, more specifically at one of yours and Lando‘s good nights, with his head between your thighs.

"That’s great!", Mason called happily and brought you into a hug.

"Uh-hmm."

"I think we should go out tonight and celebrate this!", Mason spoke excitedly, pressing a kiss to your temple.

*~*~*~*~*~*

Mason told you to invite a few friends as he did the same so you decided to ask your two best friends to come. And same as you, they were never one to turn down an invitation to a night out.

"So, you’ve been acting a little weird ever since we’ve been here", Mia pointed out, taking a sip from her drink. "Mason asked me to be his girlfriend", you dryly replied, making Mia almost spit out her drink again and Laura shockingly turn her head towards you.

"What?!!", they called in unison. You nodded, taking another sip of your drink. "Well, did you say yes?", Laura pressed, both hers and Mia’s eyes staring you down intensely.

"Uh-hmm", you gave the same answer as to Mason a few hours prior. "That’s- uh great", Mia stuttered over her words for a bit. Her and Laura look each other before Mia looked away.

"Fine, if you won’t say it I will. Finally!!! I’m so damn happy you finally completely moved on from Lando and found someone who treats you better than that piece of junk", Laura started rambling and just in that moment your eyes locked with the devil Laura has been talking and you’ve been thinking about.

No fucking hell. That couldn’t be true.

How can it happen that after 10 months of not running into Lando once while clubbing, toady was the day where it happened?

"We both weren’t great in that relationship", you muttered, slightly defending Lando without even meaning to, your eyes still locked with his.

An arm wrapping around your waist pulled you out of the staring contest. "Hey babe", Mason whispered in your ear and placed a sweet kiss to your temple. You internally cringed at the nickname and the rotting sweet gesture.

Laura’s eyes sparkled at the sight of you, while Mia caught your annoyed looking gaze. She was always the one who understood you and Lando the most out of all of your friends. Maybe because she was such a sweet and genuine human that she believed both of you could change for each other or probably she simply understood how attached you grew to each other that no matter what, that bond wouldn’t break.

And judging from the fact how Lando and you captivated each other just moments ago, that bond also didn’t break in the last 10 months apart.

"We’ll go take a smoke, you wanna come?", Laura asked but you shook your head. Ever since the whole thing with Lando started you never touched a cigarette again. He didn’t like it, it was unhealthy and being with someone who doesn’t smoke made you smoke less as well, until you stopped completely.

"You should really enjoy life a little again", Laura replied, knowing your reasons to quit smoking.

"Maybe I’ve just come to the realization that I don’t need to poison my lungs to enjoy life", you simply answered, rolled your eyes and turned away.

"Can you get me something to drink?", you asked Mason who was still gently rubbing your waist, actually only wanting to bring some distance between the two of you. "Uh yeah sure, what do you want?", he asked. "Just bring me anything", you replied, stepping out of his embrace as a sign for him to get going.

He nodded and turned around but not before placing a gentle kiss to your forehead. You cringed internally.

"Y/n?", his voice suddenly spoke behind you, making your whole body freeze. Lando’s hand wrapped around your waist and pulled you in, something he did quite often when you were 'together'. "What are you doing here?", he whispered and you immediately felt your legs weakening. You had no idea why your body immediately reacted to him and you hated yourself for it.

Lando only smirked when he noticed you wobbling a little and gripped your waist tighter. "Missed me?", he muttered, placing a gentle kiss on your exposed shoulder, making your eyes flutter and your body lean back into his.

"300 days later and you still react to my touch like that", he smirked.

"He really can’t give it to you properly, I can see that from the way he was holding you", Lando snorted, making fun of Mason and you didn’t feel the slightest need to defend your boyfriend because you knew Lando was right.

"You shouldn’t", you warned Lando before hearing someone clear their throat behind you.

Lando dropped his hand from your waist and his gaze darkened when he saw Mason standing behind you

Said boy pulled you into a possessive hug.

"Hey, babe", he smiled, pressing a kiss to your temple before handing you your drink.

You sniffed before realizing it was Vodka Coke. A smirk made its way on Lando’s face when he saw your drink and your reaction. You knew he knew that you hated Coke.

"And you are?", Mason let his eyes wander to the curly headed boy in front of you. "Lando", he muttered, ignoring Mason who held out a hand for him to shake. "Okayyy", Mason whispered. "You wanna dance?", he then turned to you. You simply nodded and accepted his hand that led you into the crowd of people.

Mason pulled you in, wrapping his arms around your waist. "Isn’t that the guy with all of those girls?", he asked, leaning closer to your ear so you’d understand his words over to loud music.

"Lando Norris, yes", you nodded, interwinding your fingers behind Mason’s head. "Do you know each other?"

Flashbacks of Lando and you floated your mind. Driving along the French Riviera in his McLaren, the occasional stop to get in a quickie, or the sneaking away from his engineers to meet in his drivers room. And finally, him peacefully sleeping next to you on that one damned night, his curls a mess on his head, his torso bare with a few red marks on his back from your activities before and his beautiful eyes shut.

"No", you simply replied before placing your lips on Mason’s to get him to stop asking questions.

Mason more than happily gave in, letting his hand wander down to your ass, gently rubbing it. You kissed him harder, wanting him to be a little bit rougher as well, to firmly grab you and not just delicately touch you.

But instead he backed off.

"Woah, what’s gotten into you today? This is totally not like you!", he stated with a confused smile, which made you even angrier. Of course this was like you, he just didn’t know you well enough.

"I’ll be in the restroom for a second", you rolled your eyes before leaving him standing alone in the middle of the dance floor.

You pushed open the heavy door to the women’s restroom, being thankful that no one was there before putting your hands on the marble counter and leaving your head hanging.

Until the locking of the main door made your head shoot up. And to be perfectly honest, you half expect him to follow you in here.

"What happened to your newest toy?", Lando smirked, leaning against the now closed door. You rolled your eyes and didn’t reply.

Lando pushed himself off the door and walked closer to you until he stood directly behind you, looking at you through the mirror. "Don’t roll your eyes at me, baby", he warned.

"Now tell me what happened to that guy? Realized he couldn’t give you want you want?", Lando smirked, quoting your words from the night you last saw each other. You shook your head, not wanting to give into him.

"Come on baby, I saw your face. You didn’t like the gentle touches in the middle of a club dance floor, admit it!", he dared you.

"'Newest toy', what do you think of me? That I slept around with everyone that was in a 1 mile radius of me?", you ignored his words and stared at him through the mirror.

"Did you think I didn’t see you? There were flashing lights", you huffed. "Maybe I wanted you to see me and please baby, don’t play all innocent", he whispered, still standing behind you but coming dangerously close now.

"At least I had the decency to keep my nights out of sight unlike you!!", you called.

"Oh baby, don’t you think I‘ve heard the rumors? About your hips…", Lando stepped forward and let his hands trailed over your hips, "and thighs…", he let them wander further down to your thighs, gently rubbing the exposed skin. You let out a sigh at the familiar feeling and closed your eyes in pleasure, "and those whispered sighs", he smirked and quickly turned you around before lifting you up on the bathroom counter.

"Exactly rumors", you breathed, before he smashed his lips on yours.

Lando’s hands immediately grabbed your legs, opening them so he could stand between them. Then they went to your waist to pull you in closer.

Lando groaned at the feeling of you finally back in his arms.

His hands kept scanning over your body, squeezing your boobs which made you throw your head back and let out a deep moan.

"Been waiting to get my hands on you again for so long, baby," he breathed heavily, speaking into your skin as his fingers fumbled open the top of your blouse. His lips trailed over your exposed chest and stopped just under your collarbone, sucking the fragile skin between his lips.

"You’re saying you missed me?", you teased, trying hard to push the words out before another moan interrupted you. Lando grinned and ripped open the buttons of the white silk blouse, allowing your tits to spill out.

Lando swore he could come from that sight alone. "You're so gorgeous," he muttered, more to himself than to you, before looking back into your eyes.

His lips attacked yours again while his large hand worked your bra covered boobs.

Your eyes fluttered, feeling that all too familiar ache in your core while the large size of his palm against you, made you think of those thick, veiny fingers between your thighs.

Your hips pressed against his, feeling his hard cock against you, making you smirk.

Lando's eyes darkened as you ground yourself against him, faster, harder. His one hand tightening around your waist and his head falling forward on your shoulder.

"Admit it, darling", you whispered into his ear. You could tell me was holding back a moan, his restraint hanging by a thread, and every move you made threatened to break that thread.

You wanted to make him snap, an evil smirk brightening on your face as you moved your hips faster.

While he closed his eyes, you took the opportunity to fiddle with the metal belt around his hips, opening it along with the button and zipper of his jeans.

"Can’t wait, can you, you desperate little whore", Lando smirked, watching you push down his jeans and slide your hands inside his boxers to grab his cock.

Lando's head fell back with a groan as you started pumping his hard cock.

"Missed your hands, darling", he groaned, holding on to your waist tighter when you trailed your finger over his swollen tip before pulling your hand back, tracing them down his abdomen.

"Please, Lan", you begged, knowing your whispered words would make him weak. But he’s been playing this game just as long as you were.

His fingers slipped under the hem of your skirt, quickly stroking up to your clothed core. A heavy moan escaped your mouth.

Lando caressed the inside of your thighs while his lips traced down your neck, leaving a few marks here and there.

His finger pushed your laced thong to the side before lightly gracing your pussy, making your hips buckle into his hands. "Lan-", you moaned. An evil smirk spread on his face. "Now who’s desperate?", Lando whispered, repeating the action twice, pulling away way too quickly.

"I hate you", you breathed, throwing your head back before grabbing his wrist and holding it in place.

Lando shook his head but finally gave in and dipped the tip of his finger inside you. Your grip on his wrist tightening. "M-more", you slightly pleaded, trying your best not to sound too desperate but failing miserably.

"I’ve missed watching you react to me like this, still the very same as the first day", he said, pushing a second finger inside you to stretch you out. A high pitched moan left your throat and your hand let go of his wrist to grip the edge of the marble counter.

His lips were still traveling along your half exposed upper body, one hand pulling down your left bra cup, making your boob spill out before he took your nipple between his lips.

"Lando- I-", you moaned loudly, thanking heaven that he locked the door when he came in and gripping the counter tighter, your knuckles almost turning white.

He pulled his fingers out of you, making you whine at the feeling of emptiness, before you felt his hand trying to get your thong off. You lifted your hips a little to help him, watching as he pushed your underwear in the back pocket of his trousers.

"You should see yourself, darling", Lando smirked mockingly, his fingers being welcomed by her glistening pussy as he traced them along your slit.

"So desperate for me", he cooed, watching your eyes close and a frown forming on your forehead as you moaned.

"It’s funny how eager you are for everything I give you, baby", he chuckled humorless. "You won't call for months and now you want my cock inside of you?"

You whimpered at his words, all while he slowly inserted his finger inside you again.

"Lando- oh my- please", you continued whimpering and pleading, making Lando smirk. "What is it, baby? You're gonna have to tell me exactly what you want, you know how this works", he cooed into your ear.

He was teasing and you knew that, you have experienced it multiple times before. You didn’t want to give into him but damn his long thick fingers and how they felt inside you. You mind already playing images of him fucking you till you’re nothing but a whimpering mess.

"C’mon", Lando demanded firmly. "You've always been mouthy with me, even earlier, so why are you being quiet now, huh?"

"Lan- lando please, more", you whined, while moving your hips on his finger to get some sort of relief. "I just need more, please", you begged slightly, your eyes closed and not wanting to look at the winning smirk on Lando’s face.

"But you already have a boyfriend, mylady", Lando reminded you with an evil grin. You shook your head, the mess of your hair whipping around. "N-no", you tried to deny as he added a second finger.

"Just wanna cum, please- fuck!", you muttered as Lando curled his fingers inside you.

Lando, completely ignoring you, continued with his question. "What more could you possibly want?"

"I want your cock- so bad, just fill me up- fuck, Lando- fuck me, please- I-", you begged, your eyes tired but glistening in desperation and lust. "Jus’ wanna- want you to fuck me hard and fill- uhh- I wanna be full with you please, please Lando", at this point you didn’t even care anymore that you sounded like a desperate slut.

You’ve gone 10 months without seeing Lando in person, of course you had your fair share of fucks but you couldn’t pretend that any of them came even close to pleasuring you the way Lando was able to.

"Such a needy girl", he tsked before wiping you tears away, that you didn’t even notice had started falling down your cheeks. You clenched around Lando’s fingers, loving the way his voice sounded in your ear.

"Oh you want to cum?", Lando looked at you with a devious smile. "Do you think you deserve that?" Before you could reply, you felt his lips pressing against yours, his tongue gliding between your lips without being met with a lot of resistance.

He hummed in satisfaction, tasting the alcohol from the drink you previously had on your mouth before he pulled away, only to let his tongue trail from your lips, over your neck and down to your chest as he sucked on your skin, leaving a dark purple mark on your breast. You were too far gone to realize anything until the sudden bite of Lando's teeth on your nipple shocked you out of your daydream.

"I asked you a question, baby", Lando hummed, licking over your hardened nipple. You blinked down at him, seeing a little blurry. "W-what?"

His grin was wickedly evil as he looked up at you. "Aw, poor baby's already going cock dumb and I haven't even fucked you yet." Your cheeks heated but didn’t give you time to reply before slamming his cock inside you.

You gasped loudly, grabbing the back of his neck for leverage and letting out a strangled cry as Lando continued to fuck into you at high speed.

There was truly no one who could fill you up like he did.

The sound of his hips clashing against yours and both of your strangled moans were the only thing left to hear in the restroom. You felt your pussy clench around Lando’s cock, making him moan into your shoulder. He moved his fingers from rubbing the side of your waist to your clit, touching the already sensitive bundle of nerves and rubbing it as you cried out.

"God! Fuckin- hell- ohh!"

"I think God is the last person to help you right now, darling", Lando chuckled but got interrupted by a moan as your walls clenched around him again. You felt yourself nearing your orgasm with every rock of his hips.

"Fuck, baby you’re so tight", he moaned. "You have no idea how much I missed this tight fucking hole, perfectly clenching around my cock like this- ohh", Lando spoke in a light whisper, rubbing eight figures on your clit.

Your legs shook as you felt your orgasm approaching, your walls tightening. "Fuck, Lando, I- shit, I- I’m cumming!", you let out a breathy moan once more before clenching one last time. Your vision going blurry while your pussy kept throbbing around his cock.

"Lando, please I need-", you winced at the oversensitivity when he kept pounding into you. "Time", you breathed through a moan, gripping the back of his neck tighter as you felt another orgasm approaching. All while Lando never stopped fucking into you even when you came for a second time in a row.

The overstimulation leaving you as a sobbing mess. "Lan- lando, it’s too much! I- I can’t- fuck! 'm cumming, Lando-", you cried, tears streaming down your face, you head falling forward on his chest, not having the ability to keep it upright anymore.

"Yeah? You’re cumming again?", Lando mocked you, rocking his hips a bit slower.

"But I missed you so much, haven’t you missed me?"

"I- missed you- fuck! So much- so fucking much", you cried, your walls repeatedly clenched around his cock.

"Fuck! Lando!", you called pathetically when he started to pick up his pace again and relentlessly started hammering inside you, chasing his own orgasm.

You couldn’t do anything apart from moan, cry and clench around him, feeling another orgasm approaching as well.

"Shit- I’m so close", Lando groaned as a whisper, pulling you closer to him and placing his lips on yours. "I’m cumming- baby- I’m-", he whispered against your lips. Your body already going limp against his as you felt him filling you up with his cum.

A deep and breathy moan left his lips as he slowed down his pace. You felt the sticky liquid dropping out of you and running down the inner side of your leg.

Lando whipped it up with his finger and held it in front of your mouth. Without hesitation you took his finger inside your mouth, swirling your tongue around it and closing your eyes at the taste of his cum on your lips.

Lando gently rocked his hips again, making you whine. "Not again, Lando- please I- I need a minute", you winced, feeling way too overstimulated after cumming so many times in a row.

"Shh, baby it’s okay, just tryna fuck my cum back into you, to make sure it stays there until I can go back inside you again", he reassured you, before slowly pulling out, making you gasp and wince at the feeling of emptiness.

Exhausted you placed your head on his chest and closed your eyes while he held your waist.

"So did you find something greater in all those models’ beds?", you said with a dumbfound smirk forming on your lips, your mind still hazy while trailing your fingers over his bare chest. You felt his chest vibrating as he laughed and shook his head with a smirk. "Oh baby, I think you know exactly that nothing compares to you!"

You chuckled and lifted your head as he reached over to the paper towels and started cleaning your inner leg up a little. "What do we do now?", you asked, a hint of insecurity in your voice, as the reality of your situation came crushing down on you. "Well, I for damn hope you won’t go back to that milk boy", Lando chuckled, reaching for his belt to close his trousers again after tucking his cock away.

You stayed silent, your blouse still halfway open, your body too tired to move. Lando looked into your eyes before reaching to cover you up again. "You wanna come to mine?", he asked while closing the last button of your blouse.

*~*~*~*~*~*

Getting out of the club without Mason seeing you turned out easier than expected, however something you didn’t expect were people hanging around in front of the monegasque nightclub.

As soon as you opened the door, you already heard yours and Lando’s name being called and saw at least ten phones recording you.

Well, now Mason knows anyway, you thought while Lando grabbed your hand tighter and pulled you to his car quickly. Both of you waved a few times while passing the fans but stayed silent for the short walk. Lando opened the door for you before jogging around to get to the drivers side.

You snuggled into the seat of his familiar car, that wore his familiar scent and when Lando started up the car, he put his familiar hand on your thigh. You took a deep breath, you might be toxic but how damn good does this familiarity feel? It might just cancel the bad parts out.

Lando’s fingers drew circles on your thigh and he smirked when he noticed you opening your legs a little bit wider, an invitation to move his fingers up further.

His hand scooted up, pushing the material of your tight miniskirt away and gently tracing along your inner thighs.

"Baby careful or you’ll ruin the seat", he whispered sarcastically. He didn’t give a damn if you actually did and you knew that because this wouldn’t be the first time it happened.

"Lando-", you quietly whimpered when you felt his fingers come dangerously close to your core, still feeling the sensitivity of the multiple orgasms he had given you merely twenty minutes ago, but backed off just before touching you. "Shhh, baby", he spoke, keeping his eyes on the road while entering the tip of his finger.

Your eyes fluttered shut and you sunk down the seat a little. Without having to see, you knew Lando was smiling.

He pushed his finger further inside and immediately followed up with a second one. You quietly moaned at the pleasure.

"Already so fucking wet for me, baby", he spoke. "My good girl", he purred moving his finger faster inside you.

You moaned at his words and the way his fingers stretched you, making you see stars. "L-lando-", you whispered but got interrupted by another moan when he scissored his fingers. Your eyes shot open and you grabbed his arm tighter, your fingers most likely leaving marks on his skin.

You started moving your hips up to meet his fingers, chasing your own release in the passenger seat of Lando’s sports car.

But Lando suddenly slowed down and almost pulled his fingers out of you completely leaving you empty and whining. "L-lando - plea - ahh- please, baby", you couldn’t form proper sentences while his fingers traced your clit.

"Shh, no baby, you’re not coming until we’re home", he gently whispered, making you furrow your brows. He slid both fingers back inside you and picked his pace up again, making you gasp before an idea came to your head.

You let go of his arm and reached over the middle console and started palming the slight bulge in his trousers.

Now it was his turn to let out a surprised gasp. "You are playing a dangerous game, baby", he muttered, gripping the steering wheel tighter. You simply giggled and squeezed his clothed cock through his pants.

Lando twisted his fingers inside you, making you stop your movements and close your eyes. You hectically tried opening up his belt and trousers before sliding your hand inside his boxers, stroking over his tip that was already leaking pre cum.

"Baby-, I’m driving remember", he rasped, his finger still moving inside you but your main focus now laid on his cock in your hands. "It’s not like this is the first time", you breathed and started pumping his cock.

You could see how much he was fighting to close his eyes, which made a sadistic smirk form on your lips.

Because you were too focused on him, you didn’t see that you were already in front of Lando’s apartment.

He slid his fingers out of you and pushed your hands off him as well. "Let’s go!", he sternly said, getting out of the car and walking towards the entrance of his apartment building already, his trousers still opened.

You smirked and left the car as well, hurrying behind him. As soon as you got to the elevator, Lando reached for your hips and smashed his lips on yours again.

His hands moved to your ass and squeezed it playfully.

When you heard the familiar bling of his apartment elevator, he didn’t even look. Lando just moved you backwards out of the elevator, still kissing you. You fumbled his key out of the back pocket of his jeans and opened the door as soon as you got there.

Lando grinned and pushed you against the door to open it up completely before attacking your lips once again, kicking the door shut with his foot.

"Where you wanna go?", he muttered between kisses and moans. "Here is fine", you said breathlessly and pointed to the couch. Lando smirked, remembering what had happened on this couch, remembering catching you making out with a random dude after one of your fights.

"Was it over when he unbottoned your blouse?", Lando smirked, opening your blouse button for button, before pushing it off your body.

You smirked when you realized where he was getting at. But two could play that game, you had also caught him with a random girl on his exact couch.

"Was it over when she laid down on your couch?", you replied with the same smirk, only standing in your lace underwear and walking backwards to sit down on his couch.

Lando moved closer in only his trousers. He placed his strong arms on either side of your head and leaned down so his lips were almost touching yours.

"Was it ever really over?"

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lemonlover1110 · 3 months

Note

So I binged your entire Dad series and I love it so much! I was cleaning and couldn’t help but feel giddy about the prospect of Gojo being the type of dad who threatens boyfriends, so could you write a scenario where Geto & Gojo are having a play date and the two precious babies walk up to them holding hands and announces they’re dating? (Like how we grew up in elementary school saying we have a bf/gf)

dad!Satoru Gojo & dad!Suguru Geto

Warnings: Fluff

Discord +18 - Twitter - Ko-Fi

Satoru and Suguru having kids at the same time meant that their kids would grow up to be best friends. At least that’s what the two expected, and so far as they grow, it seems that way.

Satoru’s daughter and Suguru’s son are both six which means that they both have too much energy for their little bodies. Both of their wives arrange playdates so that the kids can get the energy out, but this time around they arranged it so their husbands would keep an eye on the kids. Both were mildly annoyed when their wives made plans without consulting them, but they assured that they could handle it.

Satoru and Suguru sit on the couch, watching as their kids play together. They talk to each other about the plans they have coming up, briefly watching that their kids aren’t killing each other. Luckily enough, the pair seems inseparable, so much so that it reminds the dads of their own friendship. The kids are just mini versions of their parents, it’s no surprise that they get along so well.

“Daddy.” Satoru’s daughter calls out, and the man is so engrossed in a conversation that he holds up his index finger. He needs one second before tending to his daughter’s needs. Suguru glances over, and he blocks out whatever Satoru says, his eyes slowly going wide.

When Satoru notices the reaction of his best friend, he stops mid sentence. His head turns as if in slow motion to look down at his daughter, his eyes shooting wide open when he notices that his daughter’s precious hand is holding that of Suguru’s son. He tells himself that it’s nothing weird, kids hold hands all the time with no meaning whatsoever. Satoru clears his throat before asking, “What did you need to say, honey?”

“Katashi is now my boyfriend.” She announces with the prettiest smile on her lips. Yet, Satoru’s hand goes over his heart and he gasps. Boyfriend? At six? No way, absolutely not.

“Oh, c’mon bro, they’re just six. It’s nothing serious.” Suguru can’t help but laugh, lightly tapping Satoru’s shoulder to comfort him. It’s not working all that much since Satoru is certainly not happy with the news. He thought he would have at least ten more years before this happened. Satoru makes eye contact with Suguru, and his friend is clearly amused.

It’s nothing serious, he shouldn’t be taking it so hard. Satoru sighs before looking at the kids that still hold hands. It’s nothing bad, just two kids playing around. Right now, boyfriend or girlfriend holds no meaning so Satoru’s reaction shouldn’t be so serious.

Satoru still wants to scare him. How will that happen though?

“Honey, go play with your barbies, let me talk to him.” Satoru orders, giving her a serious look. She knows he isn’t playing around. She lets go of her boyfriend’s hand, and runs to her dolls. Once she’s gone, he’s left staring at a six-year-old kid, wondering what the hell he is going to say next.

“Easy on him.” Suguru warns because that’s his six-year-old. Maybe he would help if it was someone else’s son. The kid already looks terrified so Satoru can’t go overboard.

“Look, if you ever hurt her in any way, I’ll…” What would he do? He can’t threaten to beat up a literal child. “Call paw patrol on you.”

Suguru laughs, while his son nods, completely terrified of Satoru. Good enough.

#jjk #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen gojo #gojo saturo #satoru gojo #gojo satoru #getou suguru #suguru geto #geto suguru #jujutsu kaisen geto #getou #jjk geto #jjk satoru #jujutsu gojo #jujutsu geto #dad gojo #dad geto

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alessiasfreckles · 2 months

Text

amnesia - part 6 (ona batlle x reader, alexia putellas x reader, ona batlle x alexia putellas)

part 1 / part 2 / part 3 / part 4 / part 5

a/n: this is a short one, sorry! but the next chapter is coming and will be a lot longer x

-------

“We can’t tell her,” Alexia said after a moment of silence. “She’s only just started getting her memories back, I don’t want to overwhelm her. She’s already had to deal with so much in the past few weeks.”

“Fuck,” Ona repeated. “I should never have come here. I just got her to forgive me, to trust me again, and now this, fuck!”

“It’s okay,” Alexia said, trying to soothe the younger player. “It’ll be okay. We’ll figure it out.”

“How? I promised her, no more lying! She’ll never forgive us.”

“It’s not… lying, necessarily. It’s just not telling her something,” Alexia said, sounding like she was trying to convince herself of that fact just as much as she was trying to convince Ona. “Not telling isn’t the same as lying.”

“Mierda,” the brunette dragged her hands down her face. “This can’t happen again.”

---

You hadn’t heard anything from Alexia or Ona all day, which was a little odd, but you supposed that they were at training and it was to be expected that they couldn’t be on their phones 24/7. Still, you found yourself missing them, both of them.

Plus, you were bored, and started to feel frustrated about all of the hazy spots in your memory. So, you did what anyone in your position would do and googled yourself. First you read through your wikipedia page, which, to be fair, you’d already done a couple of times since waking up. Nothing really stood out there, except for some lines under ‘Personal life’ that detailed your involvement in the LGBTQ+ community.

Where else could you find out more about yourself? You deliberated for a minute before going on Twitter and searching your name - you had a hunch that you’d been told not to look yourself up on social media before, that it was something most players tried to avoid. Still, you figured that social media would probably give you some more information, even if it was just about what people thought of you.

Once the search loaded, your laptop was flooded with posts about your accident, people theorising about what had happened, how you were doing. Scrolling back a little, you found posts with pictures of you and Alexia at the café you’d gone to together, with captions talking about the two of you. Some of them speculated what you were doing, if you were dating - you had gathered that your relationship with Ona wasn’t public knowledge, although a lot of people liked to talk about whether or not you were together.

As you kept scrolling, you realised that there was a fairly large amount of people who were convinced that it was Alexia you were dating, not Ona. You looked at photos posted of the two of you, people gushing over the way you were looking at each other, the way Alexia would touch you, her hand on your shoulder, your arm. You saw countless edits of the two of you, snippets of videos where you were deep in conversation or laughing together, Alexia’s smile always directed at you.

For a brief moment you wondered why the two of you weren’t dating, why it was you and Ona, and then felt guilty for even having that thought. You loved Ona, you knew that, you could feel it throughout your body, permeating your bones. Still, the thought remained at the back of your mind, no matter how hard you tried to ignore it.

By the time 4pm rolled around and Ona finally rang your doorbell, you were so bored and sick of your own thoughts you could scream.

“Thank god you’re here,” you said as she came in. “I’m so bored I’m going to rip my hair out.”

“Oh, so you just want me around to keep you entertained?” Ona asked, a mischievous grin on her face. “I see how it is.”

“Yep,” you shrugged. “Gotta keep things interesting somehow, you know?”

Ona swallowed down the guilt rising in her throat as she thought about that morning. She couldn’t let you know anything had happened. It wasn’t going to happen again. It was a one-off, a mistake. “What have you been up to today?” she asked brightly.

Your stomach twisted as you thought about the videos of you and Alexia. “Not much,” you quickly said. “I looked myself up online a bit, but there’s only so many times I can read my own wikipedia page before I start to feel like a narcissist.”

Ona laughed, not questioning your day’s activities any further, and the wave of relief you felt was tinged with shame.

#hannah writes fics #ona batlle x reader #ona batlle #ona batlle fanfic #ona batlle imagine #alexia putellas x reader #alexia x reader #alexia putellas imagine #alexia putellas fanfic #ona batlle x alexia putellas #woso x reader #woso #woso fanfics #woso imagine

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banggyu0308 · 10 months

Text

genre: internet strangers to lovers, idol au, smut

warnings: nsfw under the cut, not very coherent, slutty yeonjun, dom!yeonjun, sexting, choking kink, pet names (baby), praise, drinking (they don't get THAT drunk, alright guys?), one night stand-ish, degradation, unprotected sex, breeding kink, handholding, cursing, dacryphilia, yeonjun lurks on social media TT, reader is bold ASF, not proofread

wc: 2.5k+

an: tysm for the username help @itgirlgyu TT + this is just for the delulus + @beomsl MEL YOU REMEMBER WHEN WE TALKED ABT PART OF THIS???? + i might title this later but who knows!!

taglist: @full-sunnies , @agustdiv1ne

yeonjun who likes to wear his tank tops to show off, loves heading onto moa twitter and tumblr after lives just to see the fandom having a meltdown... especially hard stan social media, watching all the comments and photos of himself show up. he likes being in control like this, having the power to make everyone else go crazy just by wearing something else that day.

he scrolls and scrolls and one specific post pops up, it's community labeled and when he clicks 'keep reading', he can see why; pretty tits on display from the original poster, comments in the tags all about how she's all his, and he's not very surprised to feel himself growing hard in his pants. yeonjun eyes the username, ready to click the blue-fonted 'follow' button, but it's already gone, and his eyes widen to see that it's an account he's been following and interacting with for a while. that fact only makes it better, and he's clicking to his chat with you before he can even think it through what he's about to do.

yawnchoi you look really pretty in that new post...

yn what can i say? yeonjun brings out a special part of me 😭

yawnchoi im very sure he feels the exact same

yn in my dreams 😭 don't fuel my deluluness

yawnchoi i'm being very serious right now

yn mhm mhm sureeee and how would YOU know? 😑

yawnchoi ajksdbwsjdhbw maybe this wasn't a good idea

yn WHAT wasn't a good idea, hm? 🤨

yawnchoi baby all i'm trying to do is figure out how to word that i'm yeonjun 😭

yn i do not believe you for one moment

yawnchoi i'll send a pic that i would never, ever post and you can even reverse image search it or whatever or i could send a video, im not messing around baby

yn go ahead then ;-;

yawnchoi [sent a photo]

yn alright so yeonjun would definitely never post a photo of him in his boxers in bed so imma need that video 🙏

yawnchoi [sent a video]

yn oh. oh holy shit choi yeonjun has seen my tits- NOT ONLY HAS HE SEEN MY TITS HE LIKES THEM- one sec imma need to process haha im totally not hyperventilating haha

yn alright im back hi haha

yawnchoi helloooo 👋

yn wow. alright. so. uh. how do i ask this- you wanna see more tit pics?

yawnchoi THAT WAS SO BOLD HELP ME- but yes pleaseeee

yn [sent a photo]

yawnchoi oh baby- holy shit you're so pretty 🥺

yn thanks jjunie kwsnbdwjkd im still like- going crazy rn yawnchoi thats cute baby :((

yn wjhbswhjdhj so- since you've seen my tits i wanna see you again :(( preferably your dick but haha

yawnchoi yeah? pretty baby wants to see my dick?

yn kjwbshwjdbhe yes please?

yawnchoi asking so nicely... alright baby~ [sent a photo]

yn oh 😳 oh fuck alright sjbdsewjh wanna touch :((

yawnchoi me or yourself, baby?

yn well, both, but only one can happen, right? so me-

yawnchoi go ahead, can i see? yn alright 😳 [sent a video]

yawnchoi baby's so pretty :(( wanna see you cum for me <3

yn [sent a video] would be better if you were here :( want you to touch me so bad wjbwjhdbe

yawnchoi can fly you into korea if you want...

yn YOU'RE KISSING *KIDDING

yawnchoi i'm notttttttt dekjbdekj pretty cunt's got me all horny :((

yn i don't even care if it's a one night stand choi fucking yeonjun's gonna fly me out to korea to fuck me heck yeah

---------------------------------

and he does. books a flight last minute for the next day, from your country to seoul, puts on a pair of sunglasses and his least conspicuous outfit, and drives to the airport. he isn't THAT nervous- it's not like he thinks you're gonna murder him.

and when you walk out of the airport building with nothing but a backpack with you, looking around and waving slightly when you see him, his heart quickens just a little. (and NOT just because he's seen you naked).

you decide to sit in the back of his car for no reason other than you want to, and maybe a little bit because you can't exactly handle looking at him straight on quite yet.

to your surprise, there's no awkward small talk, just him getting straight to the point and saying all the members are out of the dorm currently, but, ever the gentleman, he says since you flew a long way, you can sleep a little bit first and he won't bother you.

your whole body is on alert and you find yourself thinking that there's no way you'd be able to sleep now. it's one thing to sext someone knowing they're an idol- another to actually be in the car with them, on your way to where they live, and knowing you're going to actually fuck them.

yeonjun politely takes your bag when you get out of the car, and when his fingers wrap around the strap, his hand brushes yours slightly. you internally feel like you might faint- you hadn't actually prepared yourself for this, and now he was touching you and he feels real and you knew he was real but now it just feels extra.

holding your bag, he opens the door to the dorm, leading you in before following, taking you into his room and placing your bag down on the floor next to his bed. every single action that takes him closer to you makes your face grow hot, the bed dipping slightly under your weight when you sit down. the sheets are soft, but your mind barely registers it, focusing instead on the fact that you are in yeonjun's bed.

he opens his mouth to say something, and you panic, cutting him off quickly with a wry grin and a statement. "i might need some alcohol in my system before we do anything else."

yeonjun raises his eyebrows in the slightest, a little surprised, but he also gets it. he's pretty sure both his body and his mind want you way too much right now, but he's so nervous he might not do anything. his hands are twisted in his lap and he quickly realizes and sits on them instead before standing.

he leads you to the kitchen, getting himself a can of beer and letting you pour yourself a couple shots of vodka. you know your limits- it's just enough for you to get a little tipsy and stop overthinking everything.

knocking one back, you enjoy the burn in your throat before taking the second. the slight buzz under your skin makes you smile slightly, leaning against the counter while he takes long sips of his own drink. it's obvious he wants this to pick up, so you busy yourself messing with his shirt just a little while he drinks. you slip your fingers under his sleeve, mindlessly rubbing your fingertips back and forth over his skin. you can tell he remembered your comments the previous day about his arms, basing his outfit around that.

he has another tank top on today, arms flexing when he brings the can to his lips to take another sip, and you move your hands a little farther down to rest on his chest. this time, when he lowers the can, his lips are a little wet from the drink and you can't help but press a messy kiss to them, licking the liquid off. yeonjun lets out a slight hiss when your tongues meet, left hand reaching behind him to place the can on the counter.

the alcohol must really be working already because you're both stumbling to his room, messily tugging each other's clothes off, and yeonjun leaves a line of wet hickeys up your neck. each and every touch of his skin on yours makes you feel fire burn a trail across your body, but it's in a way that makes you almost absolutely sure that it's not just because he's one of your celebrity crushes, or because you're a little drunk.

yeonjun's movements are so rushed that in seconds he's on top of you, his own shirt off, pants quick to follow once you tug at them. your hands find way to his newly-lightened hair when his lips and tongue meet yours again, a different kind of intoxication weaving itself up and over each of your limbs, the kind of intoxication that makes you want to live and breathe this man.

"want you," he whispers, cheeks pink from the alcohol, his eyes slightly glazed when he looks into yours, and the way he says it makes your cheeks grow hot again.

"go ahead then, 'm all yours," you exhale in response, trying to ignore the way your heart twinges at your own words. this is just a one time thing, you have to remind yourself.

but yeonjun's eyes light up and he presses another kiss to your lower lip, one hand moving between your legs to part them. his eyes lower to your cunt, and you can feel the way your underwear are sticking to your pussy. you'd chosen to wear white underwear today and you're pretty sure they're see-through by now, drenched completely from all the feelings yeonjun's touch is sending through you.

"all mine?" yeonjun mumbles, eyes wide. and when you nod, he smirks slightly. "love your cunt so much, i might just take you right now." your own eyes widen and yeonjun can feel your breath hitch. "but you'd like that, wouldn't you? pretty slut would love her jjunie taking her raw, would love to have me cum inside..."

you suck in a breath through your teeth at his words, nodding quickly, spread out on the bed beneath him. your mouth tastes like alcohol and yeonjun, and your brain tries to forget how he so flippantly called himself your jjunie.

"jjun, just, just fuck me, please?" you whimper out when he rubs a fingertip over your clothed cunt.

"baby asked so nicely, might as well give her what she wants," he coos, tugging off his boxers only once he slides your underwear down your legs. "promise you'll let me taste you next time?"

you nod, too distracted by the fact that he's already planning a 'next time' in his head to realize that he wants to eat you out, but by the time you understand, he has the tip of his cock pressed to your entrance, other hand holding yours as he slowly pushes in. the gesture feels sweet, romantic even, and you let your eyes fall shut when he pauses his movements.

yeonjun's body is pressed flush to yours in a way that allows him to brush his fingers over your neck, skin smooth against you. his hand wraps loosely around your neck and his breath is hot on your cheek when he whispers, "is this okay?"

you nod once more, only because the combination of the alcohol and his body on you is making your brain so fuzzy you can't think clear enough to speak. yeonjun hums lightly and experiments with his grip, making you gasp a little when he also hits your g-spot. he lets out a hiss when your already-tight walls tighten further around him.

he'd had a feeling that you'd feel like heaven around him, just because of the fact you had stated you were only able to fit two fingers inside yourself, but he had obviously underestimated all the sensations that were going to overwhelm him like they are now. every movement of his hips towards yours makes him fight to control the tremble of his body. your hand is linked with the one he doesn't have around your neck and every time he buries himself completely inside you, your hand tightens just a little around his.

he's losing himself just a little, hand still laced with yours, pace quickening until jolty, broken, high pitched moans are the only sound leaving you. yeonjun can't help but smirk at that, hoisting one leg over his shoulder. "fucking pussy is so perfect, almost like it's made for me, taking me so well... might just keep you here, my personal little cumslut, could bring you on tour with us, fuck you every night in the hotel room, how'd you like that, hm?"

his rhythm is so brutal you're choking on your words by now, broken sobs slipping through your parted lips, tears filling your waterline and then slipping down your cheeks, mixing with the slight mascara you'd put on this morning and making your face a mess. yeonjun likes it too, the way he's so easily able to get you like this, just a few words from his lips and you're crying.

he can't help but tell you this with a mocking pout on his lips that turns into yet another smirk, chuckling when all you can do is whimper incoherently. yeonjun kisses you gentle enough to make up for his harsh words though, he's only trying to make you feel good, and he knows you like it when he talks down to you.

one hand still around your neck, the other moves from your hand to your waist, and he's only fucking into you harder when you whine out that you're close. his lips catch yours again when you gasp out his name, gummy walls fluttering around his dick as your whole body shakes from the force of your orgasm, yeonjun's fingertip rubbing at your clit making you convulse under him.

yeonjun bites back a little moan and lowers his lips to your ear again. "can i cum in you, baby? let me make you mine?"

you can't tell if he's just saying it in the heat of the moment, but you nod, wanting nothing more than to feel him inside you.

he bites his lip slightly, only losing control completely when you lick up the side of his neck and bite a splotchy hickey onto his neck. his warm cum fills you as he mumbles out a string of curses mixed with your name against your neck.

yeonjun practically collapses on you once he pulls out but lets himself take a second to marvel at how pretty you look right now, mascara leaking down your cheeks and neck, his cum and yours leaking from your swollen, abused cunt.

you let him wrap his arms around your form, cheek against his chest, both your bodies hot and sweaty, his bangs plastered to his forehead. there's a question on the tip of your tongue but he answers it for you, mumbling in your ear, "will you stay? for longer than just today?" yeonjun pauses slightly, then continues. "i'm not sure if i want you to be just one time. i know that this part of our relationship is new but we've been talking for so long and yeah, i don't want you to go back home and for this never to happen again."

you purse your lips, alcohol fogging up your brain and making you a little too sleepy to respond. "we'll talk tomorrow, hm? it's late and i had a long flight and i'm tired, jjunie..."

he nods slightly, running a hand through his hair, and presses a kiss to your forehead. "goodnight, yn."

"night night, yeonjun," you exhale.

you're almost half asleep when you hear him whisper, "the others'll be home soon, if they see us like this, i'm blaming you..."

#ada speaks :)#adas hard hours #txt hard hours #txt hard thoughts #txt smut #yeonjun smut #yeonjun hard thoughts #yeonjun hard hours #yeonjun fic #txt fic #txt x reader #yeonjun x reader #this yeonjun reminds me of yeonjun in one of my fics and i LOVE it #may add this to the list of things to write part 2's too #not my fav endings but i had to #its IMPORTANT

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iluvmattsbeard · 7 days

Text

on the phone (c.s)

master list

chris sturniolo x reader

warnings: nothing! just a little angst.

preview: you knew with Chris being famous there would be constant obstacles in the way of your guys relationship. recently, you’ve been having doubts with your relationship since Chris and his brothers left for tour. you wouldn’t be able to see him for almost two months. you couldn’t handle the distance but Chris reassures you everything will be okay.

a/n: big time rush + chris sturniolo. my two favorites at once. masterpiece. - L 🤍

you stand there as you watch the boys load the bus with their luggage. they were leaving for their first tour ever. it was a bitter sweet moment. as happy as you were for the boys, you couldn't help but feel sad at the same time. you and Chris haven't been separated for so long. now he's going to be gone for almost two whole months. Chris asked if you wanted to come along, but you were so busy with college. you and Chris have been dating since high school. so him gaining so much popularity to the point people are paying to see him, has you feeling proud and worried.

you snap out of your thoughts when you hear Nick speak, "well, that was the last bag." you pout slightly as he embraces you in a hug. "I hope you have fun Nick." you say rubbing his back. it was also bitter sweet for you to see Nick and Matt gain so much attention as well. Nick and Matt were like the siblings you never had. you basically grew up with them. "thank you y/n. we wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you." he says with a smile, pulling away. you were always there by their side no matter what, supporting them. you gave them ideas for videos and you helped film them. when they were doubting themselves, you were there to encourage them to keep pushing. now look, they finally got the recognition they deserve.

Matt embraces you in a hug as he speaks, "we'll update you okay?" you nod and smile. now, the moment you've been dreading. you pull away from Matt when you meet eyes with Chris. you cover your mouth slightly as you try to hold in your tears with a smile. he walks up to you and pulls you in for a big hug, holding you. "hey, don't cry okay? I'll be back soon." he says with his face in the crook of your neck. you sniffle with a soft laugh before speaking, "I know. i’m just so proud of you three." he pulls away a bit still holding onto you. he looks into your eyes as he wipes your tears away. "i'll be fine!" you say with a weak smile. "I'll text and call you every day okay?" he says reassuringly. you nod as he holds your face, bringing you both into a soft passionate kiss. "I love you y/n." he whispers after pulling away. "I love you too Chris." you say wiping your left over tears. you hug one last time before he turns around and gets on the bus.

you stand there as you see the three of them look out the window towards you. you laugh softly as you wave good bye, with them doing the same. when they leave, you walk to your car and sit in there bawling your eyes out right away. you really hoped Chris would keep his words.

the next day, you wake up to seeing a text from Chris.

Chris

hey baby! we're preparing for our show today. can't stop thinking about you already!

you smile before texting back.

Y/N

hi handsome! I hope you have a good show. I know you'll do amazing!

Chris

thank you! you're my motivation.

you let out a small laugh as you get up and start off your day. day 1 without him starts now. you do your morning routine and head to your kitchen. you made yourself a bowl of cereal and sat down scrolling on your phone. when on Twitter, you were seeing fans of the triplets talk about how excited they were to see them. you saw some fans talk about how attractive Chris was and how even more attractive he would look in person. your heart tightens a bit at the comments. you knew you were all his but, sometimes you couldn't help but imagine all these girls all over him. you just shrug off the thoughts that popped up into your head.

as it got later in the day, you continued to scroll through Twitter again as you see the meet and greet pics fans posted. it was weird seeing Chris have his hands on some other girl. but what did you expect? you sigh as a call comes through. it was Chris. you pick it up and answer, "hey Chris" "hey baby. we just got finished with the first show! as nervous as I was, it actually went great. everyone was so nice!" he says happily. "that's awesome Chris. i've seen many meet and greet pics already." you say. "what's wrong y/n?" he asks. your eyes widen a bit as you respond, "what? nothing. why do you think something is wrong?" you say lying through your teeth.

he lets out a small chuckle before responding, "i'm pretty sure I know you. we've been together for how long now? I think I know the way you act." you stay quiet for a bit. he wasn’t wrong. "okay fine, i'm just being a little jealous. you look so cute posing with the fans. a little too cute." you respond. "you? jealous?" he questions with a soft laugh, "well i’ll have you know, you’re all i’m thinking about the whole time." he says. you smile a bit before responding, "okay well still! they get to be in your arms while I have to sit here and suffer." "well like I said, we'll be together after and you'll have me all to yourself when all of this is over okay?" he reassures you. "okay i'm sorry. I know this is your big moment. i don’t want to spoil it by being like this." you say letting out a small nervous laugh. "yeah but your feelings are valid baby." he says.

you both talk for the rest of the night before falling asleep on the phone. as time goes by, it's already the 7th show of the tour. Chris has been progressively getting busier and you had to focus on school. so, your conversations were kept short recently. it was late in the night already as you laid there sniffling. you were left on delivered for a while. yeah you knew he was busy but, this is what you were afraid of. your biggest fear was Chris getting caught up in the limelight that he just has no time for you. you shut your eyes and cry yourself to sleep.

Chris

hey baby! I'm sorry I didn't call you last night. I was so tired out.

all you did was look at it and not respond. you didn't want him to think he had to text you or call you. he should just focus on himself you thought. you didn't want him to think you wanted to be his number 1 priority. you just shut your phone and start off your daily routine.

Chris

hey what are you up to? show is about to start. the weather is nice here in St Louis. I miss you.

you read the text but don't respond again. you were too caught up in your studying to send back a text anyways. you just needed to be distracted.

later in the night, you laid in bed as you see another text.

Chris

is everything okay? are you mad at me?

again, you shut off your phone and drifted off to sleep. after about a hour, your phone buzzes. you groan and pick it up to read the contact name. it was Chris again. you answer and talk tiredly, "hello Chris?" you hear him sniffle before talking, "hey y/n. did I wake you up?" his voice sound raspy. was he crying? "yes but it's okay. what's wrong?" you say sitting up in your bed. "I just missed your voice that's all. I'm sorry I can't be able to talk as much and when shows are over, I just get so tired out." he says. "that's alright." you say feeling terrible. you were so caught up in your feelings that you didn't realize Chris felt the same way. "I know this is all hard right now. just know i'm thinking about you everywhere I go. when I go from city to city, you're always on my mind and there's nothing more that I want but to have you here with me." he says making a tear drop slide down your face.

"I just didn't realize it would be this hard." you say wiping your tear away, letting out a soft laugh. "trust me, I know. we just have to be strong okay?" he says. "soon we'll be together." he adds on. you smile at his words as you whisper, "I love you" "I love you too beautiful." he says. but you still couldn’t shake off the thought. he’s only getting more famous. next thing you know, he’ll just be even busier. it had you doubting everything.

*time skip*

a few days later, you came home from work bawling your eyes out. you were feeling overwhelmed by everything. you have a terrible boss and he would use his power against everybody. you laid down on your bed with your dirty clothes as you pick up your phone to call Chris. there was no answer. you threw your phone across the bed as you pressed your face against your mattress crying some more. is this how it'll be from now on? when you need him, he's too busy? you felt selfish thinking that. Chris worked hard for where he's at now. but what about you?

you just shut your eyes and drifted off to sleep. you felt like everyday was just a constant replay. nothing was new. you were either at home doing school, actually going to school to take exams, or at work being treated terribly. while Chris was having the time of his life.

*time skip*

even though Chris reassured you everything will be fine, you couldn't help but feel disappointed still. when you called, he wouldn't answer. when you texted, he texted hours later. it was making you more upset. you only asked for one thing. it was for him to communicate, but he didn't. you always felt like he was leaving you hanging. you scroll on your phone as you see posts from the tour and sigh.

Y/N

Chris I don't know if I could do this.

Chris

what are you talking about baby?

Y/N

this. I can't stand this. I know this is your first tour but, now I can't even imagine more in the future.

again, you felt guilty for feeling this way. you see him type but eventually it stops. you suddenly get an incoming call from him. you pick up about to speak but he cuts you off, "y/n please. listen to me." "this tour will be over soon. once it's over, we'll pick up right where we left off. I know it's hard but, you're not alone. do you think i just let you slip off my mind?" he says. "Chris, I understand you feel the same and trust me I feel terrible even feeling this way but, you're only getting more noticed. who knows how many more tours you'll be on. what am I supposed to do? because even when you are here, you're so caught up with You tube and I just don't want to get in between that." you say. "and when I needed you? you didn't answer me. then you didn't even apologize the next day for it."

Chris stays quiet as he gulps. "I don't know Chris. how will this all work out if this is what you do? this is your job, and I just don't fit in." you finish. "well i'm not the only one whose said this, my brothers also agree that I wouldn't even be here with these opportunities if it weren't for you. all I ask is for you to support me no matter where I am. just because we aren't near each other, doesn't mean this won't work. you do fit in my life. just because I have all this recognition, doesn't mean i'm just going to give up on us. you're the only one who truly knows. you knew me from the start. you do fit in." he says as you let out a sigh, "I can't do this i'm sorry." you say before hanging up.

Chris was left standing there slowly pulling his phone away from his ear. you shut off your phone while hugging one of the stuffed animals Chris got you back in high school. you look at it as you thought to yourself. you missed how simple things use to be.

Chris POV

it's been a while ever since I last heard from y/n. every show has been a struggle for me. we were slowly getting towards the end, but was it worth it? was this all worth it without y/n? our Boston show is our last stop. that was coming up in a few days.

Chris

we can work this out.

i've been texting her and all she does is read them. why couldn't she realize this was hard for me too? "Chris?" I hear Nick call out for me. all I do is look up at him. "we have to set up for today." he says. "yeah i'll be there." I respond looking back at my phone. "Chris, everything will be okay. she'll come around." he says putting a hand on my shoulder. I sigh before responding, "I understand where she comes from. this is all so new. but even when we aren't touring, we let filming get in the way too." "well, don't think about it too hard. I know she'll come around." Nick says before walking away. I really hope so. my heart aches every time i think about her.

End of Chris POV

time passes by as it's now the last show. the triplets finally arrive back to Boston and the first thing Chris wants to do is see you.

Chris

y/n we just got to Boston. please let me see you.

read.

Chris

please i’m back. this is what we’ve been waiting for.

read.

Chris puts his face into his hands as he groans. "come on Chris. lets go stop by the house and say hi to mom and dad." Matt says patting his back. Chris sits up, “have you heard from y/n?” he asks. Matt just looks at him and shakes his head, “nope.” Chris just sighs and nods, “well if she texts, tell her to answer me.” he says.

later during the day, after visiting their parents, the triplets finally arrive at the venue. Chris was washing his face real quick before putting on his outfit. he looks in the mirror shaking his head, "here we go." he whispers out. the time comes and the crowd can be heard chanting. the triplets come out running onto stage as the crowd cheers louder. their show then starts. the show was hilarious. it was obvious the triplets were meant to be up on stage. the fans were really loving them.

after a bit, something catches Chris' eyes. it was a big sign that read 'I love Chris!". "that's a pretty big sign." Chris says into the mic. "is that even allowed?" he continues with a small laugh. "your right. nobody else has signs." Matt says joining with a laugh.

"show yourself!" Nick shouts out into the mic. the sign moves revealing a face. "i'm sorry! I didn't get the memo!" you shout out. Chris locks eyes with you as his mouth is left agape in shock. you smile at him as you hear the crowd cheer. the fans obviously knew about you from the start. they adored your guys' relationship.

"hello y/n!" Nick shouts out with a smile. "surprise!" Matt says shaking Chris. Chris then gets off the stage as he pushes through the crowd to get to you. you drop the sign onto the ground as he embraces you in a hug, nearly lifting you up.

"you scared me y/n." he says hiding his face in the crook of your neck. the crowd was going crazy. Marylou and Jimmy were standing there next to you guys, clapping and smiling. you pull away from him as you look into his eyes, "I'm sorry for ever doubting us." you say. he shakes his head before responding, "don't even apologize y/n. i'm just happy you're here." you let out a small laugh as you push him away softly, "okay we'll talk after the show! get back up there." he nods as he kisses you on the cheek, running back up onto stage.

when the show ends, you meet Chris backstage and he embraces you in the same big hug from earlier. "I can't handle another goodbye." Chris whispers. "next time, you're coming with me you understand?" he says. you let out a giggle and kiss his cheek, "okay I will.” you say. “we have lots to talk about.” he says pulling away, planting a soft kiss on your lips. you smile and nod as you both sit down with him talking about the whole experience. even though you doubted this whole thing, you don't regret being in this moment right now. you'll go through what you went through over again if it means you'll be in his arms in the end. no matter what, world wide.

a/n: if you know the iconic sign scene from the show, you know what’s up. LIKES AND REBLOGS ARE HIGHLY APPRECIATED! THANK YOU! - L 🤍

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lex-loudestwoman · 9 months

Text

The Whole Story

Before we begin, a disclaimer: I believe that Taylor Swift and Karlie Kloss are in a romantic relationship together. I've come to this conclusion carefully by reading all the signs Taylor has given us through her lyrics, media presence, clothing & jewelry choices, marketing, visuals, and interviews. This is all a theory of what I think has gone down between Karlie and Taylor since 2013.

2013 & Earlier - The Beginning

VS Fashion Show 2013: The first official meeting of Karlie & Taylor was at the 2013 VS Fashion Show.

This may not have been their true first encounter (s/o @sophietv for her amazing work about this, she outlines all the times Kaylor interacted prior to the fashion show in 2013!).

According to a Teen Vogue interview in 2014, Taylor and Karlie were introduced to each other at the same time that Taylor met Emma Stone by Andrew Bevan of Teen Vogue. That was in 2008 at the Young Hollywood Awards.

After that first meeting in 2008, Taylor attended a number of fashion shows that Karlie walked in: Tommy Hilfiger Spring Show (9/16/2009); Rodarte Spring 2012 show in NYC (9/13/2011); Jean-Paul Gauthier in Paris (9/30/2012), Elie Saab Spring/Summer 2013 Show (10/3/2012).

Karlie & Taylor also both attended Roberto Cavalli's 40th Anniversary Party (9/30/2010) and the Met Gala in 2011. Teen Vogue included a quote from Karlie about the Met: "Taylor Swift. I was introduced to her at the Met Gala, and we joked about having a baking date!"

January 17th, 2012: The iconic Twitter interaction between Kaylor finally happens! Taylor's cover story with Vogue includes a quote about Karlie: "I love Karlie Kloss, I want to bake cookies with her!" Karlie tweets at her the same day the cover releases.

2013 Victoria's Secret Fashion Show

By the time the 2013 VS Show rolled around, I think they were already dating in some capacity, and the fashion show was a PR move. If Taylor & Karlie were going to become "close friends" in the public eye, they needed a high-profile, highly documented story about how they met to avoid questions about the nature of their close relationship.

Taylor performed I Knew You Were Trouble (Red) for the show, and she danced with Karlie on stage while 'snow' fell.

"So it goes, you two are dancing in a snow globe round and round." - You Are in Love, 1989

Karlie later revealed in an interview that she had gotten a dramatic haircut during a Vogue shoot just before the VS Fashion Show began. This haircut was a big deal- she changed her look completely without talking to anyone about it, and Vogue asked her to keep it a secret until the shoot dropped. So she showed the VS Fashion Show like "surprise! New hair!" which drew up quite a buzz. Taylor's hair was pretty blonde and long at the time, not fully bleached but certainly lightened up in comparison to her natural hair color.

"flashback when you met me, your buzz cut & my hair bleached" - Dress, reputation

Karlie posted a ton of pictures from this event (most of which were of her and Taylor) on her Instagram. She also starts posting really sappy Instagram posts about being in love.

I think that the November 14th, 2013 post about receiving your favorite flowers from the person you love is about Taylor Swift, but who's to say!

Then, on Friday, December 13th, 2013 (Taylor's 21st birthday, which I think she references in an interview sometime when she's talking about why she loves the number 13) Karlie posts two sugarplum fairy-related photos, capturing the scene in The Nutcracker where snow falls from the sky as delicate performers dressed in white dance along the stage. This is super Taylor-coded, giving YAIL, dancing in the damn snowglobe again.

Interesting caption there, Kar. "#flashbackfriday to the good old days as a sugarplum fairy myself (aka the day I peaked)"

On December 14th, Karlie posts a solo shot on instagram and tags Josh with photo credit (this is hilarious that we let them just tell us whoever took their picture with absolutely no questioning whether they might be lying???). For some reason, I get the feeling that Taylor took this photo for Karlie the morning after her birthday when they were still together from celebrating the night before.

2014 - You're My Best Friend

Taylor buys her massive Tribeca, NY Penthouse apartment in April 2014. The home was actually TWO penthouse apartments next door to each other, and then she bought a third townhouse unit next door in 2017, and in 2018 she bought an additional 3-bedroom unit in the same building. Go off NYC Real Estate Queen! Taylor moved into her iconic Cornelia Street apartment during a round of renovations at her Tribeca home in 2016.

Big Sur Trip

VS Fashion Show 2014

Vogue Cover

BEST Best Friends

1989 - October 27, 2014

"The inspiration that I found in that [New York] city is kind of hard to describe and hard to compare to any other force of inspiration I've ever experienced in my life." - Taylor Swift, discussing the importance of NYC in an interview with ABC News given on 10/20/2014 ahead of a 1989 promo single release for Welcome to New York (1989). That quote actually reminds me of a lyric from 1989: you understand now why they lost their minds & fought the wars, and why I've spent my whole life trying to put it into words (You Are in Love, 1989).

2015 - Hiding in Plain Sight

1989 era so many public appearances blah blah blah they were girlfriends in public kissgate gay whatever, everyone agrees that Karlie & Taylor were dating in 2015 during 1989 World Tour etc

2016 - Beards or Bust

Politics and Jared Kushner

The unfortunate reality of 2016 was that Donald Trump really did get elected president, and then he really did take office and become the President of the United States from January 2017 - January 2021. (Sadly, none of it was a nightmare or even a collective hallucination, all of this actually happened in the good old U.S. of A., yeehaw!!) The sociopolitical climate in the US is charged, fraught, uncertain, and divided. Even worse for Taylor & Karlie is their closeness to Jared Kushner, Josh's older brother who is married to Ivanka Trump. Jared served as a senior advisor to Donnie Boy for his entire term, and he did such a good job being Don's accomplice in negligent, ethnocentric, homophobic, misogynistic leadership from the White House that he was made the Director of the Office of American Innovation (this entire office was created by Trump in March 2017 and dissolved by Biden in January 2021).

I think (and this is JUST speculating, I have no real evidence compiled yet to back this up, but I'll look for it eventually) Jared Kushner & Ivanka Trump are also in a queer-bearding relationship contract. I'm not going too far into it now, but there's stuff out there for both Jared and Ivanka, like former Trump staffer Noel Casler's allegations that Jared is gay and in an "arranged marriage" with Ivanka, who doesn't care about his sexuality due to her own sexual opportunism and likely queer identity.

If Jared and Ivanka really are queer and in a non-monogamous, mutually beneficial public relationship that allows them to co-parent their three children, then their involvement in the Trump administration makes things pretty damn unsafe if they ever were found out. So, I think that when Trump was elected, the entire Kushner family had to be super locked down to keep both Jared & Ivanka AND Josh & Karlie (and Mikey and Taylor) safe from any unwanted allegations.

Since the Kushner and Hess families hold international influence, wealth, and power, if all these billionaire men were suddenly outed as gay there could be serious economic and political consequences across the globe.

Not so coincidentally, Karlie and Taylor's last public event together was Lorde's birthday on Monday, November 7th, 2016. The 2016 Presidential Election took place on Tuesday, November 8th, 2016, which sealed the fate of the Kushner name to be attached to Donald Trump's Presidency. I believe that if Trump had not won (which no one expected him to do) Karlie & Taylor would not have started this Love Blackout.

This photo is the end of Kaylor's public friendship, and the start of their Love Blackout (shout out to @sophietv again for being the BEST!!)

Joe Alwyn - A Perfectly Palatable Person

I'm sure when the team realized Trump might actually win the election, they started looking for an acceptable beard. Joe really was a great choice for Taylor's life: he had features similar to Karlie's (light eyes, tall, blonde hair), he didn't have much going on with his own reputation, he had a sparkling clean dating history - because Taylor was his first ever girlfriend, he was a fellow artist and was already media trained, and he was gay, too!

Met at the Met - May 2016

red herring lyric (tied to VS 2013 show)

First Reports - May 16, 2017

The Sun broke the news of Taylor Swift and Joe Alwyn dating on May 16, 2017. According to Tree Paine a source, they had been secretly dating for months. It's later assumed that they started dating a few months before January 1, 2017, (revealed in a Lover journal released in 2019). Some sleuthing swifties connect a lyrical swap in the acoustic cover of "September" by Earth, Wind, and Fire as performed by our girl Taylor (Friday, April 13, 2018) to the diary entry and determine their anniversary was probably September 28, 2016.

Supportive Boyfriend Award? - December 8, 2017

Joe does something of heroic power. He goes to a concert with his popstar girlfriend. He apparently attended Taylor's performance in the iHeartRadio JingleBall in NYC and "stayed for the whole show and they later left together as well." lmao wut, okay, lots of people stayed for the whole show, this is such a boring relationship roll out, especially for Miss Extra!! (lovingly)

Toe is Officially Official - May 8th, 2018

Joe finally takes his instagram off private mode and posts a picture of himself, alone, next to a big cactus. Taylor also posts a picture of herself, alone, near the same big cactus. Alright, I guess that *technically* counts as giving the public some confirmation that you two know each other, but I bet Tree was mad as hell when that was their "official instagram announcement."

Then, Joe joins Taylor at the opening night of the Reputation Stadium tour in Glendale, AZ. He wore a baseball cap low to cover his face and "stay incognito" (Joe, babe, no one knows who you are...but like okay i guess, be weird about your fame that you literally wanted and signed up for). But during the song Gorgeous apparently Taylor pointed at Joe in the VIP tent, while he proudly filmed her.

Taylor travels around the country for the Reputation Stadium Tour from May-November 2018. The Rep tour is SO, SO GAY, like Jesus Christ Lesbian Jesus save us from all the rainbow and bisexual flagging!! Check my twitter thread for a full analysis of how gay the Dress performance is.

Reputation Promo:

Taylor Swift socials

Karlie Kloss socials

Reputation, The Album

Reputation was released on November 10, 2017.I consider Reputation to be Taylor & Karlie's "I'm so in love that I might stop breathing" album. This is the honeymoon, this is the up all night, can't stop, won't stop, I need you more than air kind of love.

This album is all about the pining and desperately waiting, hiding their anticipation, hands shaking from holding back from touching each other where anyone might see them. Much like Taylor's own media presence & public interactions in the Reputation era, Kaylor had gone dark, nobody heard from them for months, but they're doing better than they ever were.

2018 - Desperate Measures

The honeymoon phase ends in 2018 as shit in America gets worse for queer folks. The sociopolitical climate is getting more dangerous now, and Trump's constant attacks on LGBTQIA+ rights & safety is making matters much worse. Jared Kushner & Ivanka Trump are in the media a lot now, which means all eyes are on Josh, too.

Toe is Officially Official - May 8, 2018

youtube

Instead of hosting her usual big 4th of July Party at the Holiday House in RI, Toe goes on vacation to Turks & Caicos to celebrate the holiday. They call Backgrid to take a few pictures of them "frolicking" at the beach together. I'm so convinced, they're in LOVE!! Can't get enough of each other!! They totally hold hands all the time, this feels so natural and not weird at all!

Karlie posts a few photos in a row about the 4th of July this year. First, she's in her Anti-Hero colored pajamas with her left eye closed in a wink, sitting on a few suitcases, captioned "Kissin Paris Goodbye. *kissy face emoji*"

Then, another post on the 4th itself is of a WMAG stylized photoshoot where Karlie is a cowboy, for the Wild West with Cowboy Karlie campaign. It's captioned "Going into the 4th like *cowboy emoji* @/wmag" EXCUSE ME. "You're a cowboy like me, perched in the dark, telling all the rich folks anything they wanna hear like it could be love I could be the way forward only if they pay for it"

The implications of a Cowboy Like Me reference and this photo's timing has on their engagement story has me dead. I'll do a whole lyrical analysis and tie in of it soon.

And then she posts this pic of her swimming in an unidentifiable body of water. Could it be Turks & Caicos? Maybe!

Joshlie announces their engagement on July 24, 2018 while the two are on a vacation in XYZ? People Magazine reports that the proposal "took place a few weeks ago during a romantic weekend together in upstate New York." So they got engaged sometime in the beginning of July, right?

On July 10th, she posts a video of herself voguing down the runway with "This Kiki is Marvelous" playing in the background during Paris Fashion Week in September 2013. Her performance was considered one of the highlights of Paris Fashion Week. She captioned the video: Mood. @/jpgaultierofficial.

Quick question for Karlie, why do you feel the same way you felt before you went on stage for a make or break performance out of your comfort zone? You performed incredibly but it could have easily turned out very differently. Why would you be feeling like that right around the time of your engagement to Josh Kushner?

youtube

Karlie's instagram post on July 16, 2018 captioned "bestest of weekends with my bestest of friends" included group photos and a video of her & four girlfriends from her childhood.

So she got engaged and then spent a weekend with her friends, who then commented on instagram pictures from the weekend saying "remember, there's nothing better than old friends!" Why the heck are they talking about friends so much!? She literally just got engaged to Jo- ohhh.... Oh, right, he's gay, and she's gay. Old friends. Ahhhh.

Taylor responds to the engagement news breaking by having special guest, Haley Kiyoko aka Lesbian Jesus, join her for the Rep show at Gillette Stadium on July 27, 2018. Taylor specifically requests to sing Curious with Haley, which is a song about a lesbian woman singing to her ex-lover who is now dating a man, asking her ex if she lets him touch her the way she used to. So gay, so timely, Taylor is a petty bitch & I love her.

Do the girls back home touch you like I do? Delicate (Reputation)

The Wedding, October 18, 2018

Karlie wears her custom Dior gown and very amicably marries Joshua in someone's backyard, it looks like. Things seem perfectly pleasant, almost like watching a wedding scene featuring two actors with no sexual chemistry whatsoever.

2019 - Every Time I Don't, I Almost Do

Lover Promo is all very gay, very loud, very comingoutlor.

ME! out now! on Lesbian visibility day, April 26, 2019.

YNTCD music video out on June 16, 2019.

The Wedding, Part Two: Cowboy Karlie and Her Cowboy, Her Man

Karlie Kloss and Joshua Kushner celebrate their wedding again with a private group of friends from June 20-23rd, 2019 in Wyoming. It's cowboy themed, for whatever reason.

This wedding into a honeymoon in Africa would have been a wonderful strategy to keep the spotlight off of Karlie in Taylor Swift's immediately impending plan to come out on June 30th, 2019. Go read @sophietv's incredible post that details the failed coming out (fuck Scooter Braun).

2020: The Great War

January:

February: Karlie is in Paris, Taylor is advertising The Man MV (out February 27).

March: Quarantine begins March 16th & Taylor starts writing folklore almost immediately, which means that the events in folklore have already happened before COVID begins.

MORE ON THE WAY! I've got:

What happens when Karlie gets back to the US?

How does the Lover era go?

Lover social media & marketing presence

8.24.2019 - Blue

9.9.2019 - Lover in Paris performance

10.7.2019 - Sad Girl SNL

10.11.2019 - Sad Girl TinyDesk (& ring)

Continued sus social media from TSwift

Miss Americana

2020: The Great War (3.16.2020, Quarantine begins)

Lonely Millennial Woman Covered in Cat Hair

folklore

evermore

Karlie's Pregnancy

2022: Go Viral (Midnights, Red TV)

2023: Midnights, Eras, Speak Now TV, Broken Toe, 1989 TV, Kaylor Renaissance

My Predictions

#kaylor #lsk #taylor and karlie #gaylor #lgbetty #taylor swift #1989 taylor's version #reputation #lover #folklore #evermore #the eras tour #karlie kloss #Youtube

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st4rwon · 2 months

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enhypen followed you !

3) not you hypnotizing yourself - wc: 0.6k

synopsis - jake, being the clumsy guy he is, accidentally follows you from the official enhypen account on twitter. this leads to your life taking a full 180 and having to deal with being in the public eye.

you carefully walked up to the receptionist’s desk, your steps were shaky since you were beyond anxious.

“you must be yn, you can sit in the lobby, there will be someone to escort you shortly” said the receptionist kindly.

you took a seat in one of the chairs and looked around, damn this building was huge. as you were gazing you felt someone staring at you. as you turned around you noticed two men quickly hiding behind a pillar. you couldn’t help but be a bit weirded out, but decided it was best to just let it go.

you scrolled on your phone, trying to calm your nerves, but it didn’t work well. you were still nervous as hell. the amount of attention you had been getting online hadn’t really hit you yet, but you’ve been steering clear from looking at tweets, apart from your friends.

you were satisfied with the outcome of the meeting and truly were feeling a lot better. though you were still a bit confused as to how this all happened in the first place, as it was never explained. the team you were talking to allowed for you to just private the account and remove all your followers instead of getting rid of it completely, which had you overjoyed that your memories wouldn’t be gone.

you were about to leave the building, but suddenly you felt someone tapping your shoulder. you looked over and noticed a tall man, dressed quite fashionably. it took a second for you to register who it was, but once you looked at his face your jaw dropped. he noticed how your eyes widened and before you could speak he made a shushing gesture. he motioned you to follow him into one of the rooms, and you hesitantly did.

the second the door closed you couldn’t help but blurt out, “niki?!”

“sorry for scaring you earlier. you’re probably a bit shocked, but i just need a moment of your time.” he spoke, oddly gently.

you just nodded your head, not being able to utter another word. the next thing you know another man pokes out from behind, and you are about to lose it. it was sim fucking jake. your mouth quickly formed an o, and it took a second for you to snap out of it.

“hi…you must be yn, i hope im pronouncing I that right.” jake said, nervously.

“yeah, that’s right” you replied, blushing slightly.

“i heard you were coming here and just wanted to apologize for causing all of this. i bet this has made your daily life more complicated than it usually is, so sorry for causing the inconvenience.”

even after listening to jake’s apology, you just stood there taking it all in. your bias, the person who you admired ever so greatly, was apologizing to you?! this had to be a dream.

jake notices the way you were just staring, eyes wide and mouth still parted a bit. he smiled to himself for a second before asking, “yn…? you good?”

“oh sorry! im just still a bit surprised. its not everyday you see members of your favorite group. i admire you so much and now you’re right in front of me! sorry for rambling…”

jake smiled at the girl, she sure was cute as hell. he couldn’t help but stare into her beautiful eyes, but then riki kicked him. jake quickly shot him a stare, but realized he shouldn’t make the poor girl more uncomfortable than she already was.

“haha you’re fine! i hope you can forgive me though”

“of course! it hasn’t made my life too much more challenging than it already is” you said lying through your teeth. though things hadn’t been horrible, this new attention had definitely raised your anxiety levels to the max.

there was a bit of silence as you both just stared at each other. jake was surprised to see how pretty you were in real life, and you were amazed that jake and niki were standing right in front of you.

“ahem, hate to break this up, but we have a scheduled to get to, and im sure yn has plans as well.” riki said, bringing you both back to the moment.

“yeah, ill be on my way. i forgive you, by the way. not saying there was much to forgive in the first place, but-“

“yn, you’re fine. seriously. and thanks for accepting my apology. ill hopefully see you around, maybe at a concert or event of some sort?”

“hopefully! bye jake. bye niki.”

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their-pebble-bear · 11 months

Text

Housewife (KiriBaku X Reader)

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Notes: Okay as you guys know, I mainly write for KiriBaku.

My requests are OPEN! - Requests

__________________

Masterlist

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Summary: KiriBaku's wife was an underground hero before a mission gone wrong left her unable to work. The media starts harassing her as she doesn't work neither "contribute" to the household (aka. kids). They defend her publicly.

Warnings: Social Media bullying, minor depression and anxiety, breakdown, minor anxiety attack, cussing, threat of violence, harsh words such as whore and like so used (If I missed anything please tell me)

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Scrolling through twitter, tiktok and various other social medias, you filled your day. Ever since a mission left you unable to work without risking your entire body you couldn't do much. You've tried working receptionist jobs but the frequent headaches left you unfit for any position. You mostly ended up lounging around the house, cleaning, doing laundry. You always made sure there was food for your husbands to come home to be it in the fridge or the table.

You found a post talking about how pro heroes Dynamite and Red Riot were married with a wife and you instantly thought it was someone just hating on the poly aspect of your relationship but no, it was much worse. It was someone saying how they never saw you work, how you must be nothing more than a gold digger with two rich top 5 hero husbands to provide for you. It was degrading as they put you down to nothing more than a status seeking trophy wife. You tried to ignore it, it was common to see such people but the more posts you saw the more your felt your mind slip.

You stared at the TV, where your husbands were both in an interview at the moment and they pulled up the posts on a TV screen in front of them.

"What the fuck is this?!" Katsuki snarled as he glared at the screen.

"Who wrote this?" Eiji shivered in anger, hiding better than your short fused husband.

"A person on Twitter wrote a series of posts regarding your wife. I would like to ask, is it true the marriage was arranged by your PR team?" The interview asked hoping for a big scoop.

Kats shook in anger as Eiji was ready to get up and leave the interview.

"As you knuckleheads know, we have been married for 6 years. 3 years after we opened our agency. Our WIFE is nobody's business and if she wants to speak publicly that's on her to do so BUT nobody else DARE pry in her business." Kats spat as he got up and left.

"She always make sure our house is clean when we get home, she always makes sure we come to a homemade meal leaving it in the fridge or ready on the table. She helps us with our wounds, makes sure we always have what we need, our clothes are always clean. This for her is more than what we ask her to do and it's way above the 'bare minimum'. Please refrain from prying into our lives." Eiji says as he gets up and leaves aswell.

The PR team will not be happy but if it made it's way into an interview, it sure as hell reached you. They sped home hoping that maybe it wasn't too late, despite them knowing it definitely was.

They found you curled up on the couch, your favourite plushie under your chin and tucked close to your chest and scrolling trying to find jobs. All your head was saying was to find a job, contribute, stop being worthless, stop being a leech.

Kats grabbed your phone and threw it on the couch next to you as Eiji scooped you up into his arms and cradled you.

"Gold digger, status seeking trophy wife, whore...." Your voice kept trailing off softly as you cuddled your plushie closer to your chest shoving yourself deeper into the blanket while Eiji softly ran a hand through your hair.

"Pebble, you are NOTHING like they are saying. Please believe me darling. You have no choice in the matter and work just as hard as us." Eiji said softly as he held you.

Kats bent down by your side, placing a kiss on both you and your plushie. "He's right baby. You always make sure we come home to a nice meal, go on grocery runs, wash our clothes and everything else. We're grateful to have you here."

Kats isn't always like this, he is soft and caring but only when he needs to be or something tough is happening. You knew he never lied, something you fell for back when you met in UA. You sniffled as you slowly came back to your senses and hugged the plushie harder.

"I'm sorry. I promise I try." You said softly as they both shushed you and kissed your head.

"Baby you don't have to try. You already do so much for us." Kats said rubbing his thumb over your covered knee.

"Hey I have an idea darling, how about we get a puppy? It can keep you company when we have long missions and it can help you take care of someone." Eiji suggested smiling as he cradled you.

Your eyes shone in happiness and you nodded your head excited.

Maybe you weren't able to contribute financially to the household, but you were the one making sure they came back home to a safe place, where they knew they could remove their masks and be themselves.

-------------------

Please note! This is all my original work! I do not give permission to repost, credit yourself or steal my ideas. Reblogs are appreciated! The picture is not to be saved and used! That is originally made by my fiancé!

#bakugo x reader #kiribaku x reader #kirishima x reader #mha #anime

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princkleeatscookies · 28 days

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before anyone asks me

I said this in my other socials but yes, I'm still keeping my Strawberry Shortcake Cookie oc. (Though will be referring to her as OC!Strawberry Shortcake Cookie for now on while talking about the OC herself) MORE INFO IN THE KEEP READING!!

I created OC!Strawberry Shortcake Cookie around when I was in middle school (back when I was started out cookie run) and since then she became a main staple for my identity her design was a lot different compared to now and I developed her character since then, I couldn't exactly really change her nor I'll abandon her outright just bc of an existing character of the same name was released recently

Instead of abandoning her, I decided to let these two co-exist at the same time because, at the end of the day their similarities are just their names and nothing else Remember:

OC!Strawberry Shortcake Cookie I'm referring to a 19 year old lovable idiot photographer who's in a relationship with her childhood friend who's the fuckass consul, and is currently in college (uses she/her btw)

CANON Strawberry Shortcake Cookie is a puppy cakehound who the witch turn into a cookie in hopes of finding their lost owner (afaik, the pupper uses they/them and is also a puppy so..) PLEASE DO NOT CONFUSE THE TWO!!

-- with a vast world like Cookie Run, there's bound to have cookies sharing the same name BUT aren't the same ones like we know (like there could be a Cherry Blossom Cookie that's entirely different from the Cherry Blossom Cookie we knew, they literally just share the same name) It's really upsetting for me to see Cookie Run OC Creators outright abandoning their character they love and put a lot of work into just because of a mere "canon" version of their oc the stories and potential just gone to waste, and I wouldn't want anyone to feel that way. Your OC is your OC!! and you can do anything you want with them (as long as it's not.. y'know- weird) can't have a simple name/ingredient be getting out of your way of creating!! after all:

I'll be making a separate post about a little trend/movement I had posted in both my twitter and instagram to basically having to draw cookies with the same ingredient as the canon ones shown in the game~! the main purpose of the trend is to encourage oc creators to keep their ocs and to show that it's okay (if they already change their name, I think you can still participate in it since their origins still there!!) here's an example

I wanted to spread positivity out of this common problem within the oc creator side of the Cookie Run community and I hope you'll be encourage too, thank you all for reading this far into the post

#cookie run #cookie run kingdom #cookie run fanart #cookie run kingdom fanart #cookie run oc #oc!strawberry shortcake cookie #cookie run kakao #strawberry shortcake cookie #cake hound cookie #princkle's art #there's no such thing as 1 #there's always a second one!! bahahaha!!#(kill me-)#also oc!ssc adopts strawberry shortcake cookie as her pet hehe

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sc0tters · 8 months

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Out of It | Mat Barzal

summary: as your relationship with Tito finally hits a breaking point, what happens when Mat is there to pick up your pieces?

request: yes/no

warnings: cheating, failed relationship, drinking, allusions to sex, swearing.

word count: 3.2k

authors note: Kei said I could use the chaotic ending so I did, probably means we’re gonna have to have a part 2 (let me know if you want it). Request said something sad for Tito but happy for Mat and this is what my mind came up with. I actually enjoyed writing this one a lot so I hope you all enjoy reading it! But also don’t cheat on your partners, that’s very fucked up!

part two | part three

Things hadn’t been good for months.

When Anthony was first traded to the Canucks your boyfriend of three years always just assumed that you would join him. But you didn’t, your entire working career was spent in New York building up the your name and you weren’t ready to leave it for some city in Vancouver without the guarantee of a job waiting for you.

That seemed to be the first sign that things were changing as the boy took it as you not loving him.

Tito slammed his hands against your kitchen counter “do you ever support me in this move?” The man groaned in frustration making you taken aback by his outburst.

The accusation hurt you “of course I do.” You yelled back making his irritated tone “the fact that you think I’m gonna pack my life up at the drop of a hat makes me question how you feel about me though.” You crossed your arms sending him a glare.

This argument had gone on for the last fifteen minutes and there was still no clear sign of the end of this argument “look I can’t live in Vancouver but I can split my time between the two cities.” You offered growing tired of the way this was continuing to drag on.

But Anthony didn’t like that offer, in fact that almost felt worse than you just staying in New York “don’t bother.” He sighed pushing past you.

The hockey player moved towards the door “where are you going?” You croaked feeling your throat grow tight “I’ll spend the night with Mat.” Anthony sighed grabbing his shoes from the rack.

Your feet pulled you to the door “we don’t go to bed angry,” you reminded him “you promise.” Tears began rolling down your cheeks as you felt like you were loosing the love of your life “I’ll be back in the morning.” The boy mumbled kissing your forehead.

His lips left their print on your skin before he walked out of the apartment leaving you alone.

You two never actually spoke about that argument again, instead just choosing to ignore the fact that for the first time since you two moved in together Anthony didn’t sleep at home when he was in New York.

It felt like it was meant to be the one anomaly in your relationship or at least until February hit. Valentine’s Day you were meant to be in Vancouver with flights booked and everything but when a last minute meeting came up you had to pull out. Much to the annoyance of Anthony though.

Thinking you were doing the right thing you told him to go enjoy the dinner reservations he made. But after your long day of work when you came home the last thing you expected to see was the rumour mill that twitter made talking about how Anthony had a new girlfriend.

She was taller than you and looked like a blonde supermodel. Through frustration you grumbled something to yourself before you dialled in your boyfriends number “hey y/n!” Anthony was always good about picking up on the first or second ring “yeah I’ll be done in a sec,” he added clearly talking to someone on his side of the call.

You never liked admitting that you felt insecure in your relationship, but how could you not when you were with some hotshot hockey player? It also wasn’t helped by the fact that he lived 3 hours behind you and in a different country “don’t tell me she’s there,” you choked on the words as tears formed in your eyes.

Anthony clicked his tongue hearing the soft whimper you let out “who baby?” His nickname always had you melting into his hand but now you felt repulsed by it “that girl-“ your eyebrows knitted together as you thought the boy was playing tricks on you acting all oblivious.

The hockey player cut you off “told you that Twitter isn’t good for you.” His reminder felt condescending as you sat down feeing like you were having his lecture in person “why are they all talking about it?” Your voice was soft as you wiped your cheek with the back of your hand to clean the tears away from you.

He almost forgot he was on the phone to you as he stared at the girl who was on his couch pointing at her watch to signal that they were late “when she realised that we both had no plans tonight I said she should come with me.” Tito explained leaving you silent as he wasn’t denying that he spent the night with this bombshell of a girl “she’s just a friend though baby you got nothing to worry about.” Somehow his attempt to comfort you only made your nerves stick out more.

You tried to formulate a coherent sentence as you felt stupid for getting all upset “look I’ve got a few days off next week, why don’t I come see you?” He proposed causing that stupid love drunk smile to form on your face “I’d like that a lot.” You nodded missing your boyfriend now more than ever.

From the moment he arrived in New York you two could feel that something was different. As you invited some of his favourite old teammates over for dinner you felt relieved that you weren’t having to spend the night alone with him.

But of course that sense of peace had to be disturbed “baby why don’t you leave those for the morning?” You asked seeing Anthony’s back towards you as you entered the kitchen.

If there was one thing that usually fixed your problems it was sex. Sure that sounded stupid and like you were both teenagers, but as a couple your favourite way to end even the smallest of fights as with sex.

Which is why you thought it was the fix this problem needed “I want to wake up to a clean kitchen.” The Canadian always felt this rewarding feeling whenever he got to see an empty set of sinks in the morning.

You decided to try a little harder as you walked over to him “think I’ve got something a little more fun for you to do before that though.” You mumbled letting your hands slide up the front of his shirt.

That only seemed to piss him off “Jesus y/n let me finish the fucking-” the moment he began lashing out you stepped back keeping your lips shut until he spun around to look at you.

It didn’t take his eyes long to make their way down your body as you tied the string around your robe up clearly deciding that it wasn’t right for tonight “oh,” Anthony’s voice was soft as he realised that you were wearing his favourite lingerie.

The set was something you bought when he was on a long road trip once and you sent him pictures of each set you tried on in the store and when he picked the blue set you went to the airport to pick him up in a coat with nothing on underneath besides for that new set “forget it.” You rolled your eyes now feeling embarrassed as you turned around heading back to your bedroom where you sat on your bed for fifteen minutes waiting for him to come after you.

But he never did and you felt like an idiot.

April came around and you were now onto month four of feeling like something was wrong but you never felt confident enough to talk to Anthony about it so instead you let your relationship get to the worst it had ever been. Excuses were made each time one of you was meant to see the other and as the time between phone calls grew, the amount of fight you put up to see the other person decreased.

Tonight you were going out with some of the guys from the Islanders team. Mat invited you along as they were celebrating their place in the playoff “I know they are your friends.” You rolled your eyes at the phone call as Anthony couldn’t understand how his best friend invited you along.

It was somewhat amusing because Mat was the one who introduced you to your boyfriend “I’m going to support the boys okay?” You heard a knock at the door making you open it.

A smile formed on your face seeing older Canadian as you ushered him inside motioning to him to keep quiet as you were on the phone “yes I’ll let you know when I’m home.” It sounded like you were talking to a parent rather than your boyfriend.

Mat made himself comfortable on your couch as his spread his legs leaning into the soft fabric “I’m going to go now.” And with that you hung up. It irritated you how the first time he called you in over a month was because one of his old teammates mentioned that he was seeing you tonight “you okay kid?” Mat asked furrowing his eyebrows.

Despite the fact that there was only a two year age gap between you both when he met you, you were a freshman in college in your Maple Leafs jersey as you willingly spent your morning in a cafe arguing with the Islander player about how the Canadian team was better. Mat would never admit this to you or Anthony but he thought you were hot, that’s why he invited you to the game when the Maple Leafs came to visit. Why he scored a goal and pointed right up to the box where you sat, but even more so why he scored three goals. But no matter how hard Mat tried to impress you, it was no match against Anthony’s soft smile that he sent you making you weak in the knees.

You sighed sitting next to him “Tito is mad at me again.” You mumbled fiddling with the bracelet that the older boy gave you for your twenty first, the piece of jewellery that you now never take off.

Mat slipped his hand onto your knee giving it a squeeze “don’t worry about him.” The Canadian wanted to act like his crush on you had diminished over the years but when you called him in tears because you realised that you were drowning your sorrows in too much Chinese food for one person to ear during Anthony’s first night in Vancouver. The speed Mat drove across the city going through each red light told him otherwise.

Having him around always comforted you “think I just need to let loose tonight.” You mumbled running your hand through your hair pushing it back unintentionally revealing your collar bones that were highlighted by the low cut of your dress “finally give you a reason to keep up with me.” Mat always drank faster than you as you wrote it down to his lack of a college career where he never got the chance to grow out of it.

You rolled your eyes letting out a laugh “think you’ll be keeping up with me tonight.” You mumbled looking down at your phone to see the time “we’re late,” you groaned quickly getting up. Mat followed your actions with a smile “only means we have to make up for the lost time.” He pointed out making you laugh.

Oh how pretty that sound was.

The bar was packed full of players and their partners with you being the only plus one without a romantic connection to the team. You had practically drunk your way through the bar as the wags believed that you were making up for lost time after you turned down each of their offers to join them on girls night since Anthony left. It was stupid sure, but you always felt out of place when you were with them, so you thought that you’d feel worse without your boyfriend there.

But instead you surprisingly felt like you fitted in as Mat’s arm snaked around your waist “you want another one?” He asked motioning to your empty glass.

The girls had smirks on their faces as they watched your cheeks turn pink feeling his breath on your neck “I’ll come!” You blurted out making them bite the inside of their cheeks to hold in the giggles.

Whilst everyone thought you would marry Anthony, it made all of the girls happy to see you smile and until you or Mat did anything that crossed a line. They didn’t see the point in telling Anthony that his friend was taking care of his girlfriend.

Because to them everything that Mat and you did was friendly, the touches, the smiles, the looks. But what none of them knew was how each of your heart rates increased at the mere thought of the other. Mat locked his hand into yours as he pulled you through the crowd “two refills please.” He asked the bartender with his signature smile.

When the hockey player turned to you he realised you had been staring “what are you thinking about kid?” Mat’s voice was soft as he sat you in the barstool in front of him “how bad would it be if we left?” You cocked your head staring at his Hazel orbs that seemed to be locked into your soul.

Your question made Mat laugh “you had enough?” He frowned wanting to have more of your company for longer. You were quick to shake your head “no of course not,” your cheeks turned pink as you panicked “I just want ice cream and some vodka right now.” The pairing was weird but it seemed to be the only thing going through your mind “well it’s a good thing that I have both of those in my apartment then isn’t it?” His comment made your eyes light up with excitement.

Without thinking he held his hand out to you “they’re all so drunk I don’t think they’ll notice us leave.” Mat mumbled causing you to nod as he pulled you out of the bar somehow without anyone noticing.

During the drive back to his you remained fairly quiet as the Uber driver continued to talk to Mat about what it was like being a hockey player “I’m telling you I think he loves you.” You got the words out between your fit of giggles.

Mat groaned shaking his head “was nervous to have such a pretty girl in his car.” The boy shot back shoving his spoon back into the Häagen-Dazs ice cream container as he ignored the workout he was going to have to do tomorrow.

His compliment made your stomach do flips “think he’d be more affected by you,” you shook your head taking a sip of the expensive vodka that he had given you to drink “if he was gay-“ before you could swallow you let out a laugh resulting in a cough from you.

The hockey player grew alarmed watching your face turn red “you okay?” All you could do was nod until your throat calmed down “you care about me.” You teased rubbing your elbow with his as you smiled.

As much as Mat tried to ignore how he felt about you it was no longer working “of course I do.” The Canadian wanted to scoff that you would ever even consider to think that he didn’t.

But what he didn’t expect as your eyes locked with his was that you would lean forward to kiss him. At first Mat melted into the kiss as this was something he always wanted but as you moved to his lap he was reminded of the fact that you weren’t his “what about Tito?” Mat gasped forcing himself to feel guilty about the situation. Your lips formed a frown “he doesn’t love me anymore Mat,” you shook your head as tears formed in your eyes “and I don’t love him.” It was the first time you had ever actually said that out loud.

Yet it was all true, the fire that was once burning underneath your relationship turned to an occasional spark that had gone into hiding for the last few months. Mat stared at your soft facial expression “why don’t you leave him?” He asked furrowing his brows “don’t want to be alone.” Your confession made you seem week.

Truthfully though you had grown used to Anthony’s company and you were scared to see if you could survive without a boyfriend in your life “you aren’t alone.” Mat sighed tracing his finger along your jaw letting his thumb settle on your lip.

Maybe it was the alcohol talking but if he showed you that he was here for you then maybe you’d leave Anthony for good “prove it to me then baby.” You pushed your lips back into his as the boy walked the two of you to his room letting your body hit his mattress.

Mat was finally going to have his way with you.

The next morning.

You let out a groan as you heard a loud knock at the door “baby go get it,” you grumbled wanting to go back to sleep “fine.” Hearing Mats voice from beside you had the events of last night quickly falling back into your head.

Somehow though the boy seemed calmer about it all as he sent you a smile “could get used to this.” You were wearing one of his old Islanders shirts, the first time you were wearing a piece of merch from the team that wasn’t from Anthony.

It reminded you of the fact that you still had a boyfriend but here you were in his best friends bed covered in hickies whilst he was covered in scratches “you should answer the door.” You pushed your hair out of your face as you began to feel sick. You weren’t upset about last night, you loved the reminder of feeling what it was like to be loved.

To put it simply you felt bad that you had done it to a guy like Anthony, your mother raised you better than that “I’ll send them on their way and then we can talk about last night.” Mat wasn’t an idiot, he could see that you weren’t thinking about Anthony by the way you stared at the promise ring on your finger that he gave you when he came back in February.

It only took you two months to go ahead and fuck that one up “okay,” you nodded biting the inside of your cheek as you struggled to comprehend how you would talk to Anthony after this.

Your stomach did flips as you stared at yourself in Mats bedroom mirror. In that moment you felt like a horrible person and there was honestly no denying that you were one. Your precious Anthony would never cross a line like the one that you had and you only hoped that you had enough time to fix it before everything was thrown back in your face “what took you so long dude?”

That voice sent a chill down your spine as your eyes went wide with any desire of wanting extra sleep quickly being thrown out of the window.

What the fuck was Anthony doing at Mat’s door?

#mat barzal oneshot #mat barzal x oc #mat barzal x reader #mat barzal imagine #tito beauvillier #oneshots #imagines #hockey imagine #hockey imagines #nhl imagine #nhl oneshot #hockey oneshot #amber writes fics

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ramblingoak · 6 months

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The Cardinal's Bride, Chapter 10: Revelations

~~ Please visit The Outlaw Brides Masterpost to catch up and read more stories from this world ~~

Thank you to @tasty-ribz for the wanted poster, @ghuleh-recs for the collage and @gothdaddyissues for the divider! For some more amazing fanart check out: @meowsaidmissy (1 / 2), @snail-shell2335 here, @vahvco here, @ghulehgwen here, @rabidghoul here, @nocterish here, @enjoy-my-swearing here, @blacktie-whitenoise (1 /2), @z-xmyers (1/2/3/4), @foxybouquet here, @delulluart here, _simpera_ on instagram and valkyrieinpink on twitter. Also thank you to @kissingghouls for all her help and emotional support.

Cardinal Copia x Female Reader ~ It's time to leave the only place you've been that has felt like home. With your arrival at The Ministry looming closer and an abrupt change in Copia's behavior you feel more lost than you ever have.

Warnings: angst, swearing, vaginal fingering, nsfw 18+ only, mdni, 9,200 words

The bed was cold when you woke up.

Your arm stretched out over the spot that Copia had occupied every night while you had been at the farmhouse. The blankets were cold enough that it was obvious he had been gone for some time. The room wasn’t yet fully lit up from the sun so it wasn’t that late in the morning yet. Where had he gone off too so early?

With a sigh you rolled onto your back to stare at the ceiling. Your memories were a little fuzzy after getting back to the house last night, something that could be blamed on the whiskey you imagined. But you do remember Copia reassuring you after you voiced your fears over leaving the farmhouse. They were easy words to say but they had immediately put your mind at ease. What helped the most though were the last words he had said to you before you had fallen asleep. Copia had promised to be here when you woke up.

So where the hell was he?

As if on cue the door to the room banged open and Copia came in. You grinned and sat up, about to taunt him for ditching you but the look on his face made the words freeze in your throat. It wasn’t Copia standing in front of you right now, it was The Cardinal. The only thing missing were the black circles around his eyes and the black upper lip. Your eyes were locked on each other for a number of seconds before Copia finally spoke up.

“You need to get dressed and meet us outside.”

“Is everything ok?” When he didn’t reply you swung your legs over the side of the bed and stood up, walking towards him with hesitant steps. “Copia? Did something hap–”

“Nothing happened Principessa, which is the problem.” He scoffed at the confused look on your face and walked over to where you had laid out the traveling clothes Ethel had given you. “We need to leave and you’re holding us up.”

“Oh! I’m…I’m sorry.”

“I don’t need you to be sorry, I need you to get dressed.”

What was going on with him? He hadn’t talked to you like this since…

“Copia what’s wrong? Why are you acting like this? Hey!” You jerked away when he gripped your bicep and tugged you over to the dresser. “You don’t need to manhandle me.”

“Apparently I do in order to get you moving.” He reached out towards you again but you slapped his hand away. Before you could even flinch he had moved so he was directly in front of you, close enough you could feel his body heat. “Watch it, Principessa.”

The stark change in his behavior from the last few days was jarring. You could feel tears of frustration building in your eyes and you looked down to try to hide them from him. Something had to have happened, there was no reason for him to be acting this way towards you.

“Please, tell me what’s going on.” You took a deep breath and looked up at him. For a second the expression on his face wavered, his features softening as he met your eyes. “What did I do?”

He opened his mouth as if to reply, his hand even reaching out towards yours, but almost as soon as the movement started it stopped. His hand dropped and his mouth set in a grim line. You could feel your features crumbling but you tried to stay steady. Whatever was going on you didn’t want to upset him more by crying. Copia turned around and walked towards the dresser, grabbing your clothes roughly before facing you once more.

“You didn’t do anything.” You both turned towards the door when there was a brisk knock followed by Ethel peeking in. She smiled brightly when she saw you but it wavered when she realized you were upset. Copia mumbled something in Italian under his breath before shoving the clothes into your arms. “Stop crying and get dressed.”

You gripped the clothes tightly in your hands as he stalked away. He didn’t even look at Ethel as he went by, but she sure was glaring at him. As soon as he was out the door Ethel shut it, clicking the lock securely before turning to look at you. You attempted to smile, to tell her good morning but seeing that kind, warm look on her face that she always gave you made your own face crumple.

“Oh sweetheart, it’s ok! Come here.”

Ethel took the clothes out of your hands and tossed them onto the bed before wrapping you up in her arms. You couldn’t help but let her take your weight as the tears that had been threatening finally began to spill out. She started running a hand soothingly up and down your back, continuing to tell you that it was ok, that you could cry if you needed to. It was such a sharp contrast to how your own parents treated you when you showed any emotion that you began to cry harder.

How were you supposed to leave this place? Leave Ethel? She had become so important to you in such a short time, the mother you had always wished for. Before when you worried about leaving you had at least felt better knowing you would be with Copia but with how he acted this morning that didn’t hold comfort like it had been. Would the Ghouls act the same? Would they also start pushing you away?

“Now what did that idiot say to you?” You snorted despite your tears, meeting Ethel’s eyes and feeling at ease at the kind look on her face. She reached into a pocket of her shirt and brought out a handkerchief to wipe your cheeks for you. “Do you want me to kill him?”

“No.” You managed a shake of your head, laughing softly when she wiped at your nose. “No, I’d rather not see him get hurt.”

“Hmm, well we’ll see. I’ll be talking to that cowboy of yours before you all leave.”

“I just don’t know what could have happened, what I could have done to make him act like this.” Ethel gave your hand a squeeze and you smiled at her. “Did he say anything to you this morning?”

“Mr. Emeritus tried to order me around and I’m sure you can guess how that went.” Ethel flashed you a bright grin before continuing, “Then he went to the barn to wake up the others before stomping back inside.”

Everyone was probably ready to go by now. You sighed while you stood up and went over to your clothes. There wasn’t a point in putting it off any longer, but you paused and turned back towards Ethel, your eyes filling with tears again.

“I don’t want to go.” Once more the dam broke and you found yourself overcome with emotion. Ethel rushed over, tugging you into another hug and rubbing your back. You pulled away after a moment, your eyes roaming her face to try and memorize it in case you never saw her again. “I’ve never felt like this before.”

“Like what, dear?”

“Like I have a place here, like I’m wanted.” You squeezed your eyes shut, biting your lip briefly to try and stop it from trembling. “Like I’m loved.”

“Oh, sweetheart...”

“I know it’s silly since we’ve only just met, but you’ve done so much for me. More than anyone else ever has, including my own family.” When you opened your eyes you saw a few tears fall down Ethel’s cheeks. “This is the home I’ve always wanted, always dreamed about. You're the mother I always wished I had.”

“My dear, you listen to me. I’ve felt like you were family since you showed up looking like a drowned cat that night.” She reached up and brushed the fresh tears away that had started to fall down your cheeks. “Like the daughter I never had.”

“Thank you, I won’t forget you.”

“Now why are you acting like we’ll never see each other again? You are welcome back here anytime.” Her hands grabbed yours and squeezed them while she held your gaze. “No matter what’s happening, I mean it. Promise me you’ll come here if you’re in trouble.”

Her demeanor had changed a bit, her grip tight on your hands. She was acting far more serious than you had seen her act since you had met. When she squeezed your hands again you nodded, trying to give her a firm smile.

“I will, I promise.”

“Good. I don’t care if the devil himself is on your heels, my shotgun is always loaded.” Ethel leaned in and pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead, smoothing your hair out when she pulled away. “How about you get dressed and I’ll make sure your husband leaves you alone until you’re ready.”

You nodded, giving her a quiet ‘thank you’ when she handed you your clothes. When the door clicked shut behind her you gave the room one last look around. Despite what had happened that morning you were determined to only keep good memories from here. This was where Copia had first kissed you, had first pressed himself against you. You walked over to the bed and dropped your pile of clothes onto it while you stared at the covers, remembering the first time his fingers had dipped inside of you.

Your skin startled tingling just thinking about it although it was irritating to know he still had this effect on you even when you were upset with him. Hopefully he would snap out of whatever was going on with him. Maybe he was just as scared as you were about leaving. That was the idea you were going to cling to. You needed to hope that Copia would go back to how he had been acting the last few days. The Cardinal wasn’t the man you had begun to fall in love with.

Your fingers paused at the buttons of your nightgown. The realization of what you had just admitted to yourself made your stomach flip. Love? Was that how you felt about Copia? It was something you had never experienced before but you certainly had never felt this way about anyone else in your life. No one had ever made you feel this good, this wanted. No one had ever touched you like he had.

After a deep breath you started on the buttons again, letting the gown drop to the floor. The clothes Ethel had for you were comfortable and perfect for being on the road. They definitely made you look the part, like one of the gang. You hoped that was still in your future, being able to stay with them. There needed to be something more to your life than sitting in a room in some rich man’s house, waiting for instructions.

You couldn’t bear it if there wasn’t.

Copia felt like shit.

He knew it was going to be hard, keeping you at arm's length. Pushing you away. But he didn’t realize how much it would hurt him to see you hurt. It was worse than the damned nightmare. With every word out of his mouth he had seen the light in your eyes darken more and more. It had taken all of his self control not to reach out and gather you in his arms to whisper apologies to you.

The Ghouls had been abnormally quiet when he had gone out to wake them. Copia had figured it was from the whiskey and the late night, but it had seemed there was more than that at play. It wasn’t until he had heard Dewdrop mutter to Aether about wanting to stick around even longer that he realized what was going on. What was making them all move slowly and look somberly at their surroundings.

No one wanted to leave this place.

Copia couldn’t blame them. It had been a long time since he felt at home anywhere, since any of them had. The Ministry was where their things were, where they stayed between jobs, but it had never been home. Their true home was barely recognizable anymore. The only things left were the burned out husks of buildings and a small cemetery.

His thoughts were interrupted when he heard the door to the bedroom open. Your eyes briefly met his when you came down the hallway, long enough for him to see how red they were, before you focused on Ethel. The older woman and you had built a strong bond since they’d been there. It was another reason Copia felt terrible about making you leave. You deserved to have a home like this, a family like Ethel and Harold. You didn’t need to be dragged around the countryside by someone like him.

“Go on and head out to the barn, dear. I’ll be out there in a moment to help.”

“I’ll help you Principessa.”

Copia took a step back when he was met with the force of the glares from both you and Ethel. You turned to give Ethel another smile before moving towards the door. He tried to meet your eyes when you walked by but you refused to look at him. You refused to even walk close to him, deftly giving Copia a wide berth as you went past. He found himself staring at the door after you left. The regret he was feeling like a living thing in his chest.

“She likes dandelions.”

Ethel’s words made him turn back to the older woman, a confused look on his face.

“Eh?”

“Dandelions. She likes dandelions.”

“Si, I know this.” He sighed, staring at her expectantly for a moment before waving his hand in front of him. “Is there a reason you’re telling me this?”

“You should bring her some. As an apology.” Ethel was evidently not impressed with the face Copia made because she narrowed her eyes and stalked towards him. “She deserves one.”

“Does she?” He wasn’t going to admit that he agreed with her, at least not yet. “And why is that?”

“She was crying in my arms for a reason, Mr. Emeritus. I’m imagining that reason is you.”

“I’m just trying to get out of here, we need to get on the road.”

Ethel snorted in derision and gave him a look he’d only experienced from Secondo before.

“I’m not an idiot so you best not treat me like one.”

“You don’t need to know what goes on between my wife and I.”

“Ah yes, your ‘little meatball’. I’m sure you believe I don’t need to know everything Mr. Emeritus.” She smirked when he briefly gave her an odd look. You must have told her what his endearment meant. “Unfortunately for you I’ve decided that when it comes to your Polpettina I need to make sure you are treating her right.”

“Mi scusi? I have been treating her right.”

“Not this morning you haven’t. I saw the look on her face when you ordered her around like she was nothing important.”

“I am trying to leave. We should have left hours ago!”

“Oh and is that her fault? She was the one at the bonfire demanding that a bunch of cowboys tell her stories well into the night?”

Copia almost said yes but he knew that wouldn’t go over well.

“Ethel, I know you think you know everything going on but you don’t.”

“Just like Harold, more looks than brains.”

“Hey! I am fuck—“

“Don’t you cuss at me Cardinal.”

Copia froze, his eyes widening at what Ethel had called him. How could she…? He opened and closed his mouth a few times, trying and failing to think of some way to deny it but it was obvious there was no use.

“How long have you known?”

“Since you and your Ghouls showed up during the storm.” Copia started to respond but she quickly talked over him. “I can’t wait for the day that girl starts running circles around you, but I have to say it’s probably not very far off.”

“Ethel…”

“I rode around causing trouble in these parts long before you did Cardinal.” She pointed at a nearby chair and Copia obediently sat down, still trying to process that she knew who he was. Who they were. “Now I’m not sure what you’re scheming and how she’s involved, but if any harm comes to that girl you’ll regret it. Just because I’m old doesn’t mean I’ve lost my touch.”

Copia clenched his fists and glared at Ethel.

“That is the point! I don’t want her to get hurt!”

“I don’t mean just physically, Cardinal. You’ve spent the last few days pulling her into every secluded corner you could find so whatever feelings she already might’ve had for you are now even stronger.” Ethel crossed her arms and easily met Copia’s glare. “Although she could certainly do better.”

“Si, I agree. I’m not good enough for her. I will only get her hurt and that's why I need to push her away.”

“No, what you need to do is try harder.” When Copia scoffed and shook his head Ethel closed the distance between them and forcefully grabbed his chin. “For whatever reason she’s chosen you, Cardinal Copia, as the one she wants and I think you’ve chosen her too. Am I right?”

There wasn’t any point trying to lie so he just nodded his head as much as he could with his chin still in her hand. Ethel smirked and let go, briefly patting him on the cheek before walking to the door of the house. Copia slowly got up and followed.

“What do I do now?”

Ethel snorted and opened the door, letting the morning light spill into the house.

“Now you go pick her some fucking dandelions and beg for forgiveness.” He couldn’t help but groan. Picking flowers and apologizing weren’t exactly some of his strengths. Ethel stopped him at the door and pointed a finger into his face. “Dandelions and begging, I think the feared Cardinal Copia can handle that, don’t you?”

He straightened his back and nodded, wincing when she gave him another pat on the cheek.

“I think I can manage.”

Ethel smiled and finally moved out of the way, letting Copia go by and get nearly down the steps before she called out to him.

“Mr. Emeritus!” Copia turned to meet Ethel’s steely gaze. “Keep that girl safe for me.”

“I will.”

“Good.” She smiled down at Copia as she took a few steps towards him, her eyes darkening despite the bright morning light. “Because if you don't, Lucifer himself won’t be able to protect you from me.”

“Has he always been this much of a bastard?” Brizio snorted, nudging his head against your shoulder. “Is that a yes?”

You laughed when the horse snorted again, lowering his head towards your hand that still held a few apple slices. He eagerly took them when you opened your fingers, making sure to keep them away from his teeth. When the slices were gone you wiped your hand on your pants and then reached up to start rubbing his nose. Brizio nickered while he pressed up into your fingers.

“Just as demanding as he is, you two are a perfect match.” His eyes closed when you ran your hand further up, scratching between his eyes and then around his ears. “I’m sorry I used to be scared of you, you’re not that bad I suppose.” When Brizio snorted and stamped a foot you smiled, moving your hand up and down his neck. “Wish I could say the same about him.”

“Say the same about who?”

At the sound of Copia’s voice you winced. Of course he had to walk in at that moment. You turned your head just enough to see him standing in the doorway of the barn, his hands behind his back as he watched you. He looked about to say something else but you turned back around and continued to pet Brizio. You tensed a bit when you heard Copia walk closer, the spurs on his boots jingling softly with each step.

Would he apologize? Ethel had mentioned she was going to talk to him, but you doubted anything she said would actually help. One of the first things you’d learned about him was that he was stubborn. It was doubtful that even Ethel could say anything to change his mind. You felt a hand hover over your shoulder but before you could move away to avoid the contact Brizio stepped forward with his ears pinned back, loudly snorting at his master.

“Hey!” Copia jumped back, a few words in Italian falling from his lips. “Turning my own horse against me?”

“I think he can make up his own mind about things.”

You gave the horse one final pat on his neck before turning and starting to walk out of the barn. Copia moved quickly, maneuvering himself in front of you and holding a hand out.

“Can I have a moment, Principessa?”

“You had plenty of moments inside the house.” He moved to block you again when you tried to walk around him. “Copia please, don’t make this harder.”

His frustration was obvious, but you couldn’t tell if it was with himself or you. He reached up and pulled his hat off his head, holding it against his chest and timidly looking into your eyes. After a moment he took a deep breath and pulled his other hand from behind his back. You glanced down, your mouth falling open when you noticed what he was holding.

Copia had a small bouquet of dandelions clutched in his leather glove.

They certainly weren’t in the best of shape but that wasn’t very surprising. You doubted the man had ever picked flowers before in his life. At least half of them were smashed, the yellow petals flattened and wilting. You looked back up into his eyes, remembering how he had looked the other day wearing that silly flower crown you had made him. The memory made you want to cry but instead you gritted your teeth and took a step back.

“What are those for?”

“Eh, for you.” When you didn’t move he started fidgeting, tapping his fingers on the brim of his hat. “I picked them for you.”

“Why?”

“You know why.” He held the bouquet closer to you but you took another step back. “What’s the problem?”

“What’s the problem?! Do you not remember how you treated me earlier?” He winced, opening his mouth but you didn’t let him speak. “A handful of dandelions isn’t going to get me to forgive you.”

“Then what will?”

You moved, walking around him and his dandelions. At the door you paused, looking out towards where the Ghouls were waiting. Dewdrop and Harold were carefully strapping the guitar to one of the stagecoach horses the gang was taking with them. The other Sunshine and Ethel were finishing up saddling for you, the both of them laughing together as they worked. The rest of the group was milling around, waiting for you and Copia.

He called out to you again and you took a deep breath before turning to look at him. You had to bite your lip to stop from laughing, Brizio had wandered up and was munching on the dandelions. Copia put his hat back on, relinquishing the flowers to his horse and crossed his arms.

“Principessa, what will it take?”

It was hard to tell if he felt remorse or not, but you hoped he did. You hoped he would share what he had been thinking that morning, what had made him treat you that way. Copia’s mismatched eyes met your own and you offered him a brief smile before you answered.

“An apology.”

You managed to say goodbye to Ethel again without crying, but only barely.

She and Harold had packed up lots of supplies for the final leg of your journey to The Ministry. It seemed like everyone had gotten a small token of their time there. In turn they were keeping two of the horses from the stagecoach and a promise of help if they ever needed assistance on their farm. Your eyes wandered over the land as you walked towards where Sunshine was waiting by your horse.

“Ready to go, kid?” You nodded at Sunshine, laughing when she handed you a small knife. “You can never have too many.”

“Hopefully I won’t ever have to use them.”

Sunshine grinned and then jerked her head towards the horse. You let her help you up, looking over towards the barn when Copia emerged on top of Brizio. His face was unreadable as he went past and you couldn’t help but let your shoulders fall. Maybe you should have just taken the damn dandelions. It might have made the journey a little more bearable. No matter how hard you tried you couldn’t imagine Copia ever apologizing.

“Dear.” Ethel’s voice brought you out of your thoughts and you quickly glanced down to see her smiling up at you. “Remember, you come straight here if anything happens.”

You nodded and tried to give her a brave smile. There was so much you still wanted to say to her but if you opened your mouth right now you’d only let out a sob. Ethel squeezed your leg and gave you an encouraging nod.

“Thank you. For everything.”

“There’s no need to thank me dear, that’s what mothers are for.” When the tears began to fall down your cheeks she held out her handkerchief again. You both looked over at Copia when he called out for everyone to get moving. Ethel gave your leg another squeeze before stepping back to give you room to maneuver the horse. “He’s a stubborn idiot like most cowboys, but he’ll come around.”

You nodded, silently hoping she was right. Sunshine rode up next to you, rolling her eyes when Copia called out again. Reluctantly you encouraged your horse forward, following the others as they began to make their way out of the farm. It wasn’t until everyone had made it to the top of a hill that overlooked the land that you could bring yourself to turn around.

Ethel and Harold were still standing there, watching as you all left. The farm stretched out around them, seemingly glowing in the morning sun. It was beautiful and you let yourself daydream for a moment as you looked on. Copia was there when you imagined coming back to this place, his grin both dazzling and infuriating like usual. You blinked your eyes open when Sunshine called your name and gave the farm one last look.

This was what you wanted. A home like this and someone to share it with.

You could only hope Copia wanted that too.

The first day went by in mostly silence.

Everyone seemed somber about leaving the farm, although you were sure everyone had different reasons as to why. When you stopped for lunch you had attempted to start conversations with a few of them, but no one seemed interested in talking. Even Swiss was quiet and he was usually the most boisterous out of all of them. Copia had wandered off and you assumed it was to scout a bit but when he came back he had his black makeup applied around his eyes and along his upper lip.

It had only been a few days since you’d seen him wearing it but the change was still startling. With that and how he acted yesterday morning it felt like he was a completely different person. The Cardinal seemed to be back and he had no interest in speaking with anyone. When the gang finally stopped to camp that night you found yourself feeling just like you had the first few days after being kidnapped. Lost and alone.

The next day was much better, the Ghouls more talkative as they got closer to The Ministry. Rain had been scouting ahead off and on like usual, exchanging hushed words with Copia each time he returned. No one showed any concern about it so you tried to not dwell on it, there were already enough worries running through your head as it was. You couldn’t help but feel like you had made a mistake not just accepting the dandelions from Copia and hearing him out. He hadn’t even looked at you since you had left the farm as far as you had noticed. It was like a heavy weight had settled onto your shoulders now. You found yourself imagining arriving at The Ministry and being locked into a room until Saltarian paid the ransom and took you away with him.

Copia spent most of his time at the front of the group, occasionally talking to Aether but mostly remaining silent. Sunshine and Swiss flanked you near the back. Their random banter the only thing cheering you up as your destination crept closer and closer. You still had so many questions about their life there and even more questions about what would happen once you arrived. They were currently sniping at each other over something about Montana but when there was a break in their conversation you took your chance.

“What do you all do there? At the casino?”

“Oh shit, all sorts of stuff. All the Ghouls have their own job basically.” Sunshine nodded over to Swiss with a grin on her face. “Although some of us are better at them than others.”

“Fuck you. I’m multi-talented, I can do anything.”

He looked about ready to list off everything he could do but Copia shouted his name and Swiss reluctantly rode over to him. When Copia jumped down from Brizio Sunshine let out a sigh next to you.

“Looks like we’re camping here.”

Everyone dismounted and began to set up for the night. You tried to help where you could but mostly you just stayed out of the way. To your surprise Dewdrop came over and helped you with your horse, taking her over with the others. The only response you got to your thank you was a grunt, but it was something. When he came back over he had his guitar in his hands and plopped down near the campfire with a heavy sigh.

“Hey Dew can you go fill the canteens?”

Dewdrop groaned at Aether’s request while he deftly worked his fingers over the guitar strings.

“I just sat down, man.”

“I will!” You practically ran up to Aether with your hands out. “I want to help.”

“You’re not going alone.” You frowned over at Copia as he shoved Brizio’s reins into Swiss’s hands. Thankfully he didn’t notice the hand gesture the Ghoul threw at his back as he walked over to you. “I’ll go with you.”

“It’s fine, I don’t need any help.” You held tightly to the canteens when Copia tried to take a few of them from your hands. “I’m not going to run off.”

Copia stopped and met your eyes, an unreadable look on his face.

“I know you won’t, Principessa. I just want to help.” He took a step forward, glancing around before lowering his voice. “We need to talk.”

He looked so serious you finally relented, letting him take some of the canteens from you. Copia grabbed your hand and gave it a squeeze, the action making you meet his eyes briefly before you pulled your hand away and turned towards the woods.

“Great, see you guys in a few hours.” You rolled your eyes at Dewdrop’s comment, stifling a laugh when Copia kicked his knee as you both walked by. “Have fun! Rinse your hands off before you fill mine.”

Thankfully no one else said anything as you both walked away. As the creek got closer you kept waiting for Copia to say something, anything but he remained infuriatingly quiet. The longer he remained silent the more upset you became. When the creek finally came into view you couldn’t help yourself. You threw the canteens in your hands to the ground and rounded on Copia.

“You wanted to talk, so talk!” Copia stayed still and silent as you glared at him so you moved closer. “You’ve ignored me for almost two days, why?”

“I was trying to think of what to say.”

“You’ve never been short on things to say to me before!”

“Yes, but this is important Principessa.”

It felt like someone was gripping your heart in their hand, tendrils of anxiety moving throughout your body. Copia looked so serious, so somber that whatever he was building up to couldn’t be good. You dug your fingernails into your palms and tried to control your breathing when you spoke.

“What is? Please Cop–”

“Mi dispiace. I’m sorry.” He held a hand up when you opened your mouth to respond. “I’m sorry for how I treated you the other morning. You didn’t deserve that, those things I said.”

“Then why did you say those things?” You couldn’t stop yourself from sniffling a bit, the horrible feeling that had been living in your chest since that morning finally fading away a bit. “Did I do something that night?”

“No! No, you didn’t do anything.” He took a few timid steps forward, reaching out towards you. Copia seemed worried you would pull away at first but when you remained still he gently grasped your elbows and tugged you against him. You fell into his chest with a sigh, burying your face into his neck as he rubbed his hands up and down your back. “I had a nightmare.”

“About what?”

Your voice was muffled against his skin but you couldn’t bring yourself to move. You had forgotten how good it felt to be close to him, to have his arms around you.

“I thought it was the fire at first, the night my church was destroyed, but it was something else.” He pulled his hands away from your back and brought them to your cheeks, cupping your face as he tilted it up so your eyes met. “It was your wedding.”

“To Saltarian?”

He nodded, closing his eyes for a moment. You reached up and covered his hands with your own, trying to encourage him to continue.

“He knew to use you against me, he was keeping you between us. In harm’s way.” He took a shuddering breath and lowered his head to press a kiss onto your forehead before he rested his own against it. “I can’t let you get hurt, I won’t let you get hurt.”

“Is that why you acted that way? You think pushing me away like that will keep me safe?” He stayed silent, his thumbs slowly beginning to rub back and forth across your cheeks. “You idiot.”

“Hey!” Copia pulled back to glare at you. “I was trying to keep you safe.”

“By being an asshole!” He yelped when you tried to knee him in his crotch, jerking out of the way just in time. “I can’t believe you!”

“I said I was sorry!”

"I thought I had done something, I thought you hated me!" You swiped at the tears on your cheeks, angry that he had made you cry again. "I should have let Ethel kill you."

He burst out in laughter which only made you angrier. When he tried to get close you attempted to pull away, but he was too quick and managed to get you in his arms again.

"Principessa, forgive me. It was wrong of me, I know this. I'm just..." When he trailed off you looked up at him, watching as he bit his lip in an oddly nervous gesture. Copia finally sighed, reaching up to brush the rest of your tears away. "I'm not used to having something...nice."

"Nice?"

"Si, nice. You are nice and soft, uh delicate." When you snorted he dropped his forehead against yours again. "I haven't had something nice for a very long time."

You pressed your lips to his in a firm kiss, bringing your hands up to rest on his chest. When you started to pull away he followed you, one of his hands slipping into your hair and keeping you still while he deepened the kiss. His tongue swept into your mouth and you immediately brushed your own against it. It only lasted for a few more moments before he pulled away with a groan.

"Copia, don't stop."

"We should fill the canteens and head back, Principessa."

"No, you should kiss me again."

"You sound desperate," He leaned in close, his lips brushing against your ear. "Are you desperate for me?"

"Yes, yes Copia please just kiss me."

His lips were on yours immediately, both of you clinging to each other as he licked into your mouth. The bitter taste of his black makeup was on your tongue as it quickly disappeared from his lip. Copia maneuvered his hands down to your waist and started to guide you backwards. You weren't sure what his plan was and you didn't really care just as long as he kept kissing you.

When you felt a tree against your back you pulled away from his mouth with a gasp, letting your head rest against the bark. The sun had fallen behind the trees letting the moon highlight his features. He was gorgeous and right now he was yours. You wanted him so badly you didn't care that you were in the middle of the woods.

You reached up and batted his hat away, kissing him again when he started laughing. His hands wandered from your waist to the front of your pants and he made quick work of the buttons so he could start to tug them off. As soon as they were past your hips he cupped your sex, his gloved fingers warm through your undergarments. He pulled away from your lips, a deep growl rumbling in his chest as he started to rub you through the fabric.

"Wet for me already?"

You barely managed a nod, too focused on the pleasure he was pulling from you. When he pressed a finger at your entrance your knees became weak and he slipped one arm around you to keep you steady. You whimpered when he pulled his fingers away but it was only to quickly tug his glove off with his teeth, his fingers going back to your cunt when they were free. This time he slipped them underneath the thin fabric that was covering you, both of you groaning when one finger slipped right inside of you.

“This is why I miss that dress of yours. Or one of those skirts I saw you stash in your bag.” He huffed out a laugh but it turned into a moan when his fingers slid slower and stroked at your entrance. “So wet for me.”

“Copia please I-oh!” He pushed two fingers inside, slowly beginning to pump them in and out. You moved your head off his shoulder and kissed him, trying to convey what you wanted with your lips and tongue. When the hand at your back slid up into your hair you pulled away. “Take me, make me yours.”

Copia growled and surged forward to take your lips again. He moved his hand down lower so he could press his fingers even deeper, rubbing at you at just the right angle. With a cry you broke the kiss, looking down at his hand as it moved against you.

“Aren’t you already mine, Principessa?” You looked up into his eyes, unable to look away as he continued speaking to you in a low voice. “As soon as I can get you in a bed again you’ll be mine and no one else’s.”

His voice deepened as his fingers moved faster, the heel of his hand rubbing against your clit. Your back arched as the pressure built and Copia dropped his forehead to rest on your chest. You could hear him talking still but with the roaring of your blood in your ears you didn’t understand anything he was saying. Your hips started moving in time with his thrusts and finally, with one last stroke against your inner walls you came, collapsing against Copia and trusting that he would hold you up.

You arrived back to the camp facing knowing looks from everyone.

They were easy to ignore for the most part. It wasn't until Swiss had made a comment about being glad 'mom and dad had made up' that you had blushed fiercely. Thankfully Sunshine came to your defense, easily shoving Swiss over and promptly handing you a bowl of the stew Aether had made for dinner. It was nice and warm on your stomach and you quickly found yourself settled around the fire, your blanket wrapped around your shoulders.

Dewdrop had started idly playing the guitar again and you watched with interest as his fingers danced across the strings. Sunshine had been lounging next to him, looking almost half asleep. She caught your eyes on her and smiled before sitting up and leaning over to Dew. He shook his head a few times before you saw him finally nod. The random notes he had been playing suddenly changed into something more defined. You were about to ask what song it was when Sunshine began to sing along to his playing and you froze.

Her voice was beautiful.

“Can I have this dance, Principessa?”

You jumped, turning to see Copia holding a gloved hand out towards you. Your eyes wandering from the glove up to his face, raising an eyebrow when you saw the smug little smile he was sporting.

“I didn’t think cowboys knew how.”

He laughed, lowering his head almost bashfully towards the ground. His hand remained out though and he gently shook it to encourage you to take hold. You slipped your hand into his slowly, appreciating the warm leather against your skin once more. When he reached out with his other hand you eagerly grabbed onto that one too, yelping when he quickly pulled you up off the ground. You fell against his chest with a little grunt, scoffing when you saw his pleased grin.

This man didn’t know how to be bashful.

The grin stayed as he maneuvered you where he wanted you. He held onto one of your hands, pulled it to rest against his chest. His other hand rested at the small of your back. You placed your free hand on his shoulder, your fingers idly tapping along with the music. He moved you around expertly, his smile turning smug when he could see how surprised you were.

"How's this? Better than those boys from the city you danced with before?" You tilted your head up, pretending to think about it. When you took too long to answer he dug his fingers into your side and you squealed, trying to jump away unsuccessfully. "Admit it and I'll stop."

"Ok! Ok, fine!" You fell against his chest, trying to catch your breath. "Much better than those city boys."

He chuckled, murmuring something in Italian as he held you close. You let his words and the music wash over you, focusing on just being close to him. Dewdrop played a few more songs, Swiss even joining Sunshine to swing along with one. You caught Copia humming a few times but you didn't ask him about it, trusting that one day he'd sing for you. Whenever he was ready.

His arms stayed around you when the music stopped. It was like you were both under a spell and if either of you moved it would be broken. You found yourself wishing tomorrow wouldn't come, that you could stay on the road with him forever and never have to worry about meeting his brothers or anything else that would come after. Copia's lips brushed against your ear and you shivered, sighing when he held you closer.

"Will you promise me something?"

You pulled away enough so you could look at him, the firelight dancing across his face.

"Anything, Copia."

"Will you be here when I wake up?"

Secondo did his best to keep his gaze steady as he stared at Mr. Saltarian across the poker table.

“What should I call you?”

Saltarian’s voice was calm and in control as he idly sorted his chips into neat stacks in front of him.

“Secondo is fine.”

“Are you sure?” He raised an eyebrow as he glanced his way. “Wouldn’t you rather be called Papa?”

“I haven’t been a Papa for a very long time, as you know.”

“Ah yes, how could I forget.” Saltarian gave a brief nod to Aurora when she came by to refill his drink, watching her walk away for a moment before turning to Secondo again. “Bone Daddy?”

“Is there a reason you’re here?”

“Is my money no good here? That would be a shame, I’ve been meaning to visit your establishment for many years.”

“All money is good here, but I’ll pass on the cryptic game you're trying to play.” Secondo tipped back his drink, relishing the burn in his throat. “I’ll ask again. Why are you here?”

“Well it’s a funny story actually, if you’ll indulge me. You see a long time ago I thought I had rid myself of a few pests.” He took a casual look around the casino before looking back at Secondo. “But it seems like they have come back. Ghouls as far as the eye can see.”

“This is a casino. Nothing more.” Secondo nodded at Phantom to start dealing. The Ghoul’s nimble fingers were slightly shaky as he shuffled and began to flick cards to both men. “This isn’t a place of worship.”

“Oh but it is, Secondo. Everyone here is still worshiping and indulging in sin, just like you were before.”

“And here you are, indulging with us.”

“Oh! I am, aren’t I?” Saltarian let out a loud laugh that had Secondo gritting his teeth. “Apparently even I can’t resist the lure of the devil.”

“There is no devil here, Saltarian.”

“Just his mouthpieces? I’m sorry. Former mouthpieces.” The man finally turned his attention to his cards, pondering them for a moment before tossing a few chips towards the middle of the table. “You’re right though, we should get down to business. I’m typically not one to dawdle but I have to say that you intrigue me.”

“How is that?”

“Let’s take a look at where we are, The Ministry. As you call it. A truly magnificent building.” Saltarian smiled when Secondo called his bet and added his own chips to the pile. “I have to admit I’m impressed that you built this from nothing in such a short span of time.”

“I didn’t really have a choice.”

“Oh but you did, we all have choices don’t we? Isn’t that one of the things your church likes to preach?” When Secondo opened his mouth to correct him, Saltarian waved a hand around. “Ah sorry, liked to preach.”

“We had no home and barely any supplies. You and your men made sure of that.”

“And again that’s what impresses me so much! I took everything I could away from you, away from your brothers, but yet you survived.” Saltarian held up a finger towards Phantom and accepted the card tossed his way. “You know in another life we could have been business partners.”

Secondo let out a disbelieving laugh, leaning back in his chair as Saltarian’s words soaked in.

“Partners? What makes you say that?”

“I’ve always thought you had a keen mind, Secondo. Your church truly began to prosper under your reign.” He waved a hand in a circle by his head. “And this place just proves it. Where would your brothers be if it wasn’t for you?”

“You leave my brothers out of this.”

“Unfortunately I can’t, because we both know it’s because of one of them I’m even here to begin with.”

“Then you should take up your issues with him and leave the rest of us out of it.”

“You know I can’t do that. The Emeritus’s are a packaged deal.” Saltarian turned around in his chair, seemingly searching for something. “Where are your brothers by the way?”

“I do not know, I’m not their keeper.”

“Maybe not Primo’s, but I don’t think your younger brothers sneeze without you knowing about it.” He added some more chips to the pot before leaning back in his chair. “Where is Primo by the way?”

“I thought you knew?” He tensed when Saltarian smiled. “Primo was the smart one, he moved away from this all many years ago.”

“Yes, his cozy little cabin. My men and I rode by on the way here.” He smiled cruelly when Secondo froze. “Don’t worry, your brother is still alive. I’m not concerned with that old man.”

“Then who are you worried about?”

“Worried isn’t the word I’d use. Frustrated, annoyed, bothered…those are more in line with how I feel.”

“Terzo brings out those emotions in everyone.”

Saltarian’s loud bark of laughter had the surrounding tables instantly quieting down.

“I’d worry about Primo sneaking up on me before I lost sleep over getting bested by Sheriff Terzo. From the sounds of it Terzo hasn’t spent a moment sober in the last ten years.” He shook his head as he looked down at his cards. “It’s quite poetic really, if you think about it. The Morningstar falling from such a great height, just like his namesake.”

“Of course Terzo took your attack the hardest, he was our leader when it happened.”

“I think you’re wrong there. We both know who took it the hardest, just like we both know he’s the reason I’m here.” Saltarian suddenly seemed far less interested in his cards, setting them down on the table and fixing his stare on Secondo. “By the way, where is Cardinal Copia?”

“Just like I am no longer a Papa my brother is no longer a Cardinal.”

“I’m not so sure about that. I’m fairly certain he’s known as The Cardinal. The same man that has been a thorn in my side for years now.”

“The papers are the ones that come up with these ridiculous names.”

“Ah but this is very fitting, isn’t it? However, there’s no point arguing over a nickname, right Phantom?” The Ghoul froze when he was addressed, his eyes skittering back and forth between the two men in front of him. “In fact, let's stop playing this game altogether.”

“Yes, let’s.” He caught Phantom’s eyes and jerked his head towards the bar. The Ghoul’s chair scraped loudly against the floor as he shoved it back and practically ran from the table. Secondo looked back at Saltarian with narrowed eyes. “What the fuck are you doing here?”

“I’ve let your brother get away with many things over the years. I’ve let him steal from me, destroy my property, kill my men…it was amusing, for a time. I enjoyed the idea of him feeling like he was making a difference. Like he was actually affecting my business ventures.”

“And that’s changed?”

“It has.” Saltarian idly tapped his fingers on the table as he considered his next words. “Did you hear about my engagement?”

“I saw something in the papers about it. Was I supposed to send you a gift?”

“Oh no, nothing of the sort. She’s a lovely girl, my fiancé, wouldn’t you say?”

“I suppose so, yes.” Secondo shrugged, not caring that his exasperation was showing. “She’s not really my type.”

“Nor mine. Girls like her are a dime a dozen though and considering the real reason behind our engagement I didn’t feel as bad choosing her.”

“The real reason?”

“To lure your brother out of course. To get him to make a spectacularly idiotic decision. One fueled by wrath.” He smirked at Secondo then before continuing. “Lust too, if I believe the words of a man I hired to try to get her back.”

“He wasn’t successful?”

“Not successful in the way he thought he was supposed to be. But they were able to share with me some things they saw that have actually altered my original plan.”

"Mr. Saltarian I have a business to run so if you could get to the fucking point I’d appreciate it.”

“I don’t really need a wife, nor do I want one. What I wanted to do was exert power over someone that was failing to pay back their loan as promised.” Saltarian finished his drink, setting the glass back down onto the wood with a firm thunk. “But now instead of something pretty to have on my arm at whatever boring ball I’m required to attend I have something better.”

Secondo gripped the edge of the table, his leather gloves creaking from the force of it. He knew where Saltarian was going with this. It all made sense now that it was being laid out before him. A sense of dread began to build inside of him, something he hadn’t felt sense that night ten years ago.

Something he hadn’t felt sense he had heard the screaming start.

“Which is what?” He forced his fingers to relax and tried to calm his heart down. “What is better?”

“Now I have what I wanted all those years ago.” Saltarian’s smile was the same cruel one he wore the night of the attack. “The end of the Church of Emeritus.”

He tried to keep his breathing even while he met Saltarian’s gaze, tried to keep his posture relaxed as his mind raced over what the man had said.

“You already ended it years ago.”

“No, the true end will be when you and your brothers are dead, when your Ghouls and Ghoulettes are dead and when everything your family has touched here has turned to ash.” He ran a finger around the rim of his empty glass, an almost regretful look appearing on his face. “It’s a pity that I’ll lose something in the process but I’m willing to make that sacrifice.”

At his last comment Secondo straightened up, leaning forward as he stared Saltarian down.

“What do you mean?” When Saltarian stood up Secondo followed, pushing his chair behind him and not caring that all eyes were on the two men. “What the fuck do you mean?”

“How do you think the public will react when my dear, innocent fiancé is murdered by The Cardinal? It won’t be pretty, Secondo.”

“Copia wouldn’t hurt that girl and you know it.” Secondo stalked around the table, ignoring how the men Saltarian brought with him tensed and placed their hands near their weapons. He knew his Ghouls were doing the same. “He’ll get her to you in one piece.”

“No Secondo, he won’t.” The man’s grin was unnerving, so unnerving Secondo didn’t even flinch when Saltarian reached out and slapped a hand on his shoulder. He could smell the whisky on his breath when the man leaned close so only Secondo could hear his next words. “She’s going to die in your brother’s arms and after I pin her murder on your church the rest of you will die not long after.”

Thank you for reading! I appreciate all of you so much, thank you for every like, reblog and comment 💙

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