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#i wrote a part of this at 3am
halcyonfawn · 5 months
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the meaning behind "face the raven" theme in "wild blue yonder" and more
a continuation of this post. i need to talk about this otherwise i'll explode.
some people have also said that this theme is playing in "last christmas" and "hell bent" (thank you for pointing that out, i'm going to die) which makes it all even worse (better). therefore, this post is, more or less, destined to turn into capaldi's era brainrot. but not all of it, i promise.
you've been warned.
first of all, allow me to refresh your memory. let's look into the context of the scenes where we heard this music theme before.
"last christmas"
according to series 8 official soundtrack, this theme is a part of "every christmas is last christmas" and is heard quite clearly two times. they're both important scenes for the doctor and clara.
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too late.
a moment full of regrets and nostalgia. the doctor thinking he's lost clara again, wishing he would have come back sooner. clara reminicing her life without the doctor in it.
"so no one matched up to danny, eh?" "there was one other man, but that would never have worked out." "why not?" "he was impossible."
it is (heavily) implied that "one other man" is the doctor. does the doctor himself realise that she's talking about him? open for interpretation. but what this small exchange truly does is showing a game of saying something without actually saying it.
"can you really see no difference in me?" "clara oswald, you will never look any different to me."
yet another way of dancing around words. there's something special and touching about this last line. it is sort of a confession of unconditional love. but the word itself - love - is never spoken out loud.
then again, twelfth might be face blind.
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second chances.
now, this scene is a complete opposite of the one mentioned above. it's full of hope, anticipation, happiness. a beginning of a new arc. he is given a second chance and he takes it. the doctor asks clara to run away with him once again. and she says "yes" without hesitation, takes his hand, kisses him on the cheek.
conclusion? these two scenes are focused entirely on the doctor and clara's relationship. it is there to show their strong connection, how much they mean to one another. utter devastation at the thought of their time ending and the absolute joy of reuniting after being separated. a chance at a happy ending. which also makes the music that plays on the background their theme.
"face the raven"
"every christmas is last christmas" is now turned into "face the raven" and is asocciated with clara's death. it also makes the previous name even more heartwrenching since last christmas was literally clara and doctor's last hurrah. we can hear this piece of music appear in two scenes as well.
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clara's monologue about facing the raven.
"if danny pink can do it so can i. die right. die like i mean it, face the raven. maybe this is what i wanted. maybe this is it. maybe this is why i kept running. maybe this is why i kept taking all those stupid risks, kept pushing it."
she's accepting her fate and aknowleges her recklesness all the way throught the season 9. it was meant to be. there wasn't enough space for two doctors in the tardis.
"i let you get reckless" "why? why shouldn't i be reckless? you're reckless all the bloody time! why can't i be like you?" "clara, there's nothing special about me. i'm nothing but less breakable than you. i should've taken care of you."
this scene is also about how a human life can be so very short compared to the time lord's and how easily it can end. it's fragile. and it's the doctor's curse: bearing the pain of losing his loved ones.
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clara meeting her fate.
as she approaches the raven, ever so brave, the doctor watches her. he hears clara scream, then witness her collapsing onto the ground. it is extremely painful, but this is, i repeat, the doctor's curse: watching his companions leave. there's no use in running away from that pain, it haunts him every step of the way.
"hell bent"
next time, "face the raven" theme can be heard during the memory wipe sequence. there is no name given for the background music in this particular moment, but it's quite obvious it represents loss and... letting go?
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the doctor is about to make clara forget their time together (does that ring a bell, anyone?).
it is worth pointing out that the music becomes the loudest at the exact moment the doctor says:
"look how far i went for fear of losing you. this has to stop. one of us has to go."
it is the culmination of their relationship. companions that push each other to extremes. together they might destroy the whole universe in order to keep each other safe. there's no other way but to separate. they've formed such a strong connection than one is ought to forget the other.
even though at first the doctor is determined to wipe clara's memories, he then admits she is right: it is unfair to take away all that wonderful time they had from her. so he gives her a choice. or, more like, an offer to play a russian roulette. it's either you or me. i'm not going to press that button. we will do this together.
to summarise: all of these moments featured a strong connection between clara and the doctor. it also tells us a story about how hard it is to lose someone you care about deeply, especially for the doctor.
how is it all connected to the doctor and donna?
memory wipe
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the doctor has to make donna and clara forget about him in order to keep them safe. expect that he doesn't give donna a choice, wiping her memory almost instantly, without saying a proper goodbye to her. obviously, he didn't have enough time to think of a better way to solve the problem since donna wouldn't have lasted long. however, it is still a decision he regrets making.
from "the star beast":
"i'm so glad you're back, donna. it killed me, it killed me, it killed me."
if we take a look at clara's situation, it's a bit different. i've already mentioned it above: at first, the doctor wants to do the same thing to clara that he did to donna. make her forget. expect, this time he is confronted for doing so (even threatened, at some point).
"these have been the best years of my life and they're mine."
i think this line triggers something in the doctor. because this is when he realises that this is not the right thing to do. not exactly. he'd already done it once and he regretted it. so this time, he offers a slightly different solution. someone still has to forget, but they'll press that button together. it's a mutual choice.
now, i know it's not entirely related to the dialogue in "wild blue yonder", but i think it's worth mentioning that donna and clara's stories are somewhat similar. i'm sure it's been said before, but it's still important.
donna's story was incomplete because she wasn't given a choice. now, that she remembers, 14th doctor makes sure their time together is worth-while. a second chance just like in "last christams".
too alike
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another similarity between these two stories is that clara and donna are not entirely humans. not anymore.
donna's half timelord. even though her head is still not big enough to fit all the doctor's memories, she still has a part of the doctor in her.
clara's frozen in time, that makes her practically immortal. she risks her life, she reverses the polarity of the neuroblock, she gets her own tardis, she's even reffered to as "clara who" at the end of "hell bent". she has become the doctor in a sense.
but there can only be one doctor. so where's the story heading to at this point, i wonder? but we'll come back to this question later.
"but what really happened?"
before i say anything, it is obvious that the doctor's silence before and after he says "a lot" is him reminicing all that'd happened to him during the 11th, 12th and 13th reincarnations. all of the loss and pain he went through.
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but why "face the raven" theme of all things? it could be a general theme of grief/nostalgia/painful memories, nothing else implied.
but please let me be delusional for a bit longer!
just as that scene in "hell bent" brought the doctor back to the moment he made donna forget him, could it be that bringing back his best friend's memories in a whole universe that "he absolutely loves", also reminded him of another important person in his life with similar story? just like "hell bent" mirrored "the journey's end", "wild blue younder" gave us a reference to "hell bent".
this is where we get back to the question about the current story direction.
foreshadowing?
donna's story is not over. and there are a lot of possibilities how it can end.
say, there is a connection to clara's story here, i wonder if that's where the plot's heading. in one of the trailers, the doctor does say "i'm not sure if i can save you this time" to donna. and it worries me. then again, maybe they're just tricking us into thinking something bad will happen (oh the drama).
i'd say it's unlikely donna's going to die because that would be absolutely devastating after just bringing her back. at the very least, the ending wouldn't be completely "happily ever after". perhaps, sacrifices will be made in order to prevent something truly horrible from happening.
why did this face come back?
in "the girl who died" twelfth doctor finally realises why he got his face. it is a call-back to "the fires of pompei" (don't even get me started on its being the episode with 10th and donna).
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the message the doctor was giving to himself turned out to be:
"i'm the doctor and i save people!"
but what is 14th trying to tell himself?
i think it's about donna and more.
he's fixing his mistake of erasing her memories and depriving her of the right to remember amazing things that'd happened to her.
it's a reminder to actually tell people how much they mean to him. as we can see, 14th's more open with his feelings and constantly shows signs of affection towards his loved ones, even breaking the "never say i love you" rule.
it's about being honest and open with people because they deserve to hear it from him and he deserves to hear it back. because "things happen and then it's too late".
again, take 12th doctor, for instance. he constantly represses his feelings. but in my humble opinion, the reason why he's changed by season 10 was clara. she pulled him out of the dark place. and even though her death almost threw him back to that state again, he is still a better man by season 10.
but there were things left unsaid. love and care were always there but it was never said out loud. kind of the same thing happened with 13th.
i strongly believe that donna is that person for 14th. they're best friends who love each other deeply. and after the doctor lost her and got a second chance to fix everything, he does, he's being affectione. he's finally open with his feelings.
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conslusion: why did you make us read all fo this?
to answer the question in the title: it's all tied with how memories are important and priceless, fixing past mistakes, moving on and learning to treasure every moment with people you care about like it's your last.
it can also be a foreshadowing for something terrible, but i choose to hope for the better.
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
aaaand that is the end of my doctor who rant. thank you for getting this far, if you did!
my feelings about all of this can be described with this one meme:
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jamsandsuch · 2 months
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i'll be honest i've been having a little of an existential crisis since getting my graduate school acceptance.
in the opening to teaching to transgress, bell hooks talks about how when she was offered tenure she fell into a spiral. and for me, i thought that getting my acceptance to my master's program would help but if anything it's only made me feel terrified that i'm doing the wrong thing with my life.
i'm a budding sociologist and kind of by nature of that my work is tied up in activism; even moreso when my entire body of research is about my diasporic community and ways to improve our standing, the histories that brought us here, the future trajectory of our community. growing up with crippling anxiety, i've strayed away from having strong opinions, from upsetting anyone too much. growing up as a southeast asian immigrant, i strayed away from being noticed too much at all. academica offered me that space to form those opinions, and i think there was some power in that: for once i was encouraged and even rewarded for my years of quiet observation and the pent up rage and injustice i've locked away in response. naturally, academia became my safe space and i decided to pursue grad school and a career in academia. but as i see myself moving forward, i increasingly realize that as a person of color in academia, especially with the particular subject matter i've chosen for myself, i kind of need to step into that spotlight i've been so afraid of. and especially when those opinions will carry so much political weight, so much responsibility, those anxieties i've carried with me since i was little, that unfamiliarity with being seen is weighing down on me so much and i feel like i'm suffocating.
a few months ago i attended an event in my diasporic community hosted by a local activist group. they were extremely supportive and interested in my research and asked for more insight into what research like mine looks like. at the time my study was still in ethics board purgatory so i didn't have much progress to share with them, which i understandably lamented about. one of the members, who shared with me previously how they had been disillusioned by academia and thus dropped out, remarked as I outlined all the bureaucratic barriers that exist in academia: "You see that's the problem - I could go out into the neighbourhood and ask people those questions right now, put them together, distribute leaflets or organize a rally, and it would all happen so much faster and without this red tape." at the time i only agreed - mostly because i first read this as sympathizing with my academic exhaustion - but recently i've been revisiting those words as a question about if i'm really doing the right thing with my life, bigger questions about the purpose of my work more generally.
last week i attended an incredible talk by a journalist visiting from my home country who documents the human rights abuses happening domestically. as a qualitative researcher, and particularly as an urban/community sociologist, i was interested in the subject of her talk which was pertaining to building community through journalism. i was wondering if i may be able to 1) learn more about my country's politics and 2) learn more about how my work might facilitating community building. but what i walked away with was a growing discomfort in my stomach as that activist's words returned to me during that talk - this journalist was doing admirable, incredibly valuable work. the work was timely. it was immediate. it was influential. then what of my work? i've been working on my undergraduate thesis for eight months. this week alone i've spent over twelve hours hunched at my desk painstakingly transcribing interviews for analysis. and for what? to present at an undergraduate conference? to have it tossed into a sea of uncited papers? at the end of the talk a professor raises her hand to ask how academia and journalism can partner together to work towards a common goal. the speaker's response was geared towards the support they've received from quantitative researchers' data. as a qualitative researcher, what makes me different from a journalist besides a fancy university title and years' worth of institutional bureaucratic barriers my work must pass before publication? and beyond that, will it ever even be cited at all? i hoped to speak to the speaker afterward with my question, but they promptly had to leave. i walked back home and stared at my wall for a while.
two weeks ago one of my classes i teach for hosted a panel with activists from various diaspora. one student raises their hand and asks if one panelist, an iranian woman, feels afraid about the possibility of being targeted and killed for her activist work to which she calmly responds that she is expecting it. i feel a chill go down my spine as i wonder if i should be that selfless too. later during office hours a student shares with me that he's starting a project in partnership with an activist group to make critical race theory and asian diasporic history accessible beyond the ivory tower to laypeople. i wonder if i should be doing that too. with every moment i stand in front of these folks i feel like i'm standing up against everything that my work is not doing. i should be making this work accessible. i should be making this work faster. i should be ready to die in defense of my work. this guilt chokes me like a noose and with every moment i spend lying awake in bed thinking about it i string myself up higher like a flag for the world to laugh at. look at me, another useless scholar with impostor syndrome.
when it comes to the kind of work i do, i recognize that academia without activism is nothing short of ego boosting and extraction. and yet at the same time we're asked to somehow distance ourselves from political opinions so as to maintain the objectivity of our work. when i see the advocacy work done by fellow students on campus, i increasingly feel like a phoney intellectualizing work that's happening in real time on the ground that myself and my colleagues are removed from. this and my years of anxiety, and the fear around activism generated by being raised by parents from a country that has targeted academics for their politically provocative work have concocted the perfect storm of existential crisis, paranoia, guilt, and a deep seated desire to disappear. i feel useless in my work, helpless in my desire to be a part of an activist scene, and hopeless about my impact as a human being all at once. cue a pathetic image of some tortured scholar locked away in an ivory tower wiping their tears with sheets of gold leaf or something while the world burns outside. woe is me.
i brought these thoughts (or at least these thoughts as they were half baked) to one of my professors previously and he told me that i need to stop thinking. that i need to focus on what's immediately important to me: finish my thesis. get my bachelors degree. so this week during my midterm break i tried, i really did. i dove back into my old hobbies. engaged in some self care by spending time with my friends, exploring the city. and as i've done so i've realized - i'm so happy. so, so happy to be doing my hobbies. and that's just left me increasingly wondering if i'll ever claw my way out of this hole i've dug for myself: when I look at my instructors around me i see their work life balance wrecked. i see their unsustainable salaries despite all the incredible work they do and all the extra time they sank into their extra years of education (i recently learned that the published faculty salaries in our university's financial report are actually inflated, so the salaries are in fact much worse than I was led to believe and believe me, my expectations were already low - and this is at a T40). i wish i was kidding when i say that there are instructors i've known that began teaching during my first year and who i've slowly watched have the light drained out of their eyes over the last three years.
is this my destiny? to forever feel this way? to sink years of my life earning poverty wages as a TA and RA, delaying when i will finally settle down, sinking my family's money into a education for a job that won't make that money back unless by some miracle i land a tenure track position out of my phd? and all that knowing that there's a shortage of jobs for the number of phds in my field? and all of this knowing that there are folks out there doing work that's actually on the pulse of what's going on, more timely, and without the hierarchical nature of academic research?
do i think i'm going to find any of the answers i'm looking for right now? probably not. but i just feel the shadow of my future looming over me as i'm committing to grad school and i don't know what to do about it. i wake up every morning with a weight on my chest and when i think about it i can't breathe. maybe bell hooks really is a lot more relatable than i thought.
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thelastwalkingsoul · 1 year
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steddie mianite au - part 1
Sunrise has always felt like the calm before the storm to Eddie. Sure, there were the monsters, but most tended to slink back to caves and anywhere dark before the sun rose. Being up at sunrise meant that there was a high chance that none of the other inhabitants of the island would be awake. It was just Eddie and the sky.
Every morning, just as the sky was lightening, Eddie walks the same loop. From his house on the east side of the island, Eddie walks half of the perimeter of the south side and cuts back across from the west when he’s finished. He’s out for said morning walk, shoes in hand and enjoying the feeling of sand between his toes when he sees a figure lying on the beach. Worried for a moment, (though he’d furiously deny it), that it’s one of the girls, he rushes forward.
It’s not either of the girls, not even close. Lying on his stomach on the sand, face sideways in the opposite direction to Eddie is a man. A stranger, perhaps? He pokes the guy in the back with his bare foot. 
Nothing.
Sighing, Eddie puts his shoes down and kneels on the sand because despite what the others say, he cares about people, damn it! He reaches over the prone body and rolls him over by the shoulder. The man’s head flops in Eddie’s direction, allowing him to see the guy’s face. Eddie takes a sharp breath in.
The man is gorgeous. Eddie’s sure he’s a stranger now cause he would have remembered that face. His hair, while stiff from the salt, flops over his forehead and frames his perfect face. He has a spattering of freckles on his face which continue down to his neck. Eddie briefly wonders how far they continue before mentally smacking himself. If this stranger is in the same boat as the rest of them, Eddie refuses to leave him alone. No one deserves to wake up alone in a place they didn’t recognise. Not like Eddie.
So he gets to work, struggling as he drags the stranger up the beach and onto some grass in the shade of a tree. He checks that the man is breathing and presses a finger to his wrist to feel his pulse. It’s there, beating steadily. Eddie breathes a sigh of relief, checking he still had his water flask in his belt, knowing the man would want a drink when he wakes. He places his palm on the guy’s forehead, ensuring he isn’t burning up. 
Satisfied that he’s checked all he can, Eddie carefully lifts the stranger’s head up, shifting underneath and crossing his legs, laying the man’s head in his lap. Eddie leans back against the tree trunk, his hands finding the stranger's hair. It’s salty and full of sand as he observed before, dried in stiff peaks. Eddie smooths it out of his face before continuing to run with his fingers through it. He isn’t sure how long he sits there, admiring the stranger’s face while periodically checking his pulse. Eddie’s watching the waves roll in when he feels some movement beneath him. Looking down, he sees the man blinking up at him, eyes squinted against the sun. “Morning, sweetheart.”
The man blinks once more. “Hi,” he croaks out. He’s suddenly hit with a coughing fit. Eddie gently pushes him upright, rubbing his back until the coughs subside. The stranger’s head falls back into Eddie’s lap, who valiantly fights back a blush. Eddie shakes his head, remembering the water flask he’d put away earlier. He opens the top and brings it to the man’s lips, tilting his head up as he drinks. The water must do its job to soothe the stranger’s throat because he pulls back, head going back into Eddie’s lap, and thanks Eddie softly.
Eddie fails not to blush this time. The man’s voice was hot. God, why did it have to be hot? Eddie was already struggling to keep thinking normal thoughts and hearing his voice properly for the first time was not helping.
Oblivious to Eddie’s internal panic, the stranger clears his throat, bringing Eddie back to the problem at hand. He’s still worried that this man is like the rest of them, washed up with no memory of their past. So he decides to test it. “What’s your name?”
He’s quiet for a second. “Steve. It’s Steve.”
Eddie smiles down at him, fingers tingling as the guy, Steve, speaks. “Hi there, Steve.” Everyone else knew their names when they woke, Eddie included. He digs deeper. “How’d you get here?”
This seems to stump Steve, his brow furrowing as he thinks. Eddie expected this. He hadn’t been able to answer that. Still can’t. 
Eddie lets Steve think for a little longer, stroking a thumb across Steve’s forehead when the silence stretches on for too long. “It’s ok, you don’t need to answer,” Eddie assures. He goes back to stroking Steve’s hair as the man beneath him hums.
Steve’s eyes slip shut as they sit in silence; the sounds of the early morning birds and the waves breaking on the shore surround them. Eddie’s surprised Steve trusts him. He’s essentially being held in the arms of a stranger. Eddie’s enjoying every moment, so he keeps quiet. It’s Steve who breaks the silence, asking for Eddie’s name. 
“Eddie,” he says with a smile, thumb now stroking Steve’s cheek. “How are you feeling, sweetheart?”
Steve’s eyes flutter open, staring directly into Eddie’s. “Thirsty. And hungry too.”
“I think we can fix that. Anything else?”
“My head hurts,” Steve admits.
“Well,” Eddie says sweetly. “I promise to try and fix that too.”
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bulbtree · 1 year
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How did Sal manage to join the Sea of Death when Meikai's seal hadn't broken yet? I don't think Deep-Sea Prisoner had given any explanation.
That's a bit of a tricky question that needs to be answered by Funa; timeline starts being pretty wonky when your only reference are immortals
Personally, i'm leaning more on a 'prophecy was a red herring all along' side nowdays--as in, they already met before the seal and there was no visionary prophecy by Mikotsu: she simply hinted they already have a plan for next thusands of years
It's probably a bit of a hot take but some details from manga rub me that way. For example, he not only already knew the princess and spoke casually with her, but Old, Sheep and the rest, as well.
He eagerly explained the "way of the Sea of Death" with every player encounter after the reveal as if he already knows what to expect and what are their plans
And how did exactly runaway teen end up at the very top of the palace chain, right next to the ruler, all by himself? You know whats most interesting about it? Samekichi can't read. Who taught Sal?
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sunglassesmish · 2 years
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castiel + wings 1/?
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echotunes · 4 months
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am i fucking insane did the summary i wrote last night NOT SAVE. WHAT IF I STARTED KILLING
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Romance Drabble - Festival Kiss - Introducing my OC's
Also I wrote this randomly because the scene was stuck in my head so this is kinda taking place mid-plot but ya know just enjoy the writing and the fluff!
Context because this is very out of context to the whole lore of the world I'm writing 😭:
Galbana is a country in this universe (They're not actually from there tho)
Opal is Neo’s (the narrator’s) cousin
Mia and Neo are roommates and also coworkers and also vigilante idiots (:
This is a fantasy world so magic is a thing but its not really talked about here-
Obviously, I was a little tipsy. What's a festival for if not to try the various colourful ales random merchants hand you while dancing. Mia seemed to think the same, as soon as I was done talking to my brother I saw her with Opal across the field, holding a glass of a bubbly liquid such a bright yellow it almost glowed against the darkness of the night. She was smiling wider than I had ever seen her do so before. It was either the booze or Opal’s delightful sense of humour, but considering my cousin's depressed demeanour tonight I assumed it was the booze.
The band sped up to the tempo of abnormally fast folk music, urging us to dance. I couldn’t bring myself to move from my spot, leaning against the buffet table, looking at Mia. I watched as Opal and her interlocked arms and approached the dancing, both swaying a little as they walked. The purple dress the festival organisers somehow forced Mia into twirled as she moved, the fabric reflecting the fairy lights illuminating the field, it was like she was wearing a skirt made of starlight. Even without her drunken smiles, I had never seen her like this, partying in a dress, laughing with girlfriends, or relaxing at all really. It was pretty, it made me feel like relaxing too. Not that I wasn’t, after all I make it a sport to be pretty much unbothered all the time. But at this particular moment I was bothered, I was bothered because instead of dancing with the girl I love I was standing there gawking at her like an idiot.
I approached the cultish- I mean jolly- circle of frolicking losers from behind and I waited until Mia and Opal danced themselves into the direction of where I was standing. I tapped my cousin on the shoulder to swap out and she gave me the dirtiest look I’d ever received. I waited for 2 more spins until I tapped her out again. Opal groaned and stepped out of the circle. Mia looked confused and as she found an awfully handsome gentleman next to her.
She giggled, “Neo I thought you were getting pissed.”
Oh man, the impressions I give to people...
“No, actually I was bonding with my brother.” I said with dismay but I couldn’t help but grin at how in awe she looked at me, usually it was the other way around.
“Okay.” She said softly as she looped her arm through mine.
We continued dancing like this for a while. A while, until my back reminded me that it was still fractured only a month ago. Before I could escape back to the buffet table of peace Mia tugged on my sleeve.
“Neo,” she said, “my leg’s starting to hurt again, let's chill somewhere.”
And so we did. I took her hand and led her to a clearing in the field where the music was a bit quieter and the people were a bit sparser, but the lights shone just as brightly.
The band in the distance was beginning to slow down, the tempo was now at a lazy waltz. Unfortunately for my two left feet and broken back, Mia seemed to have heard the new music and looked at me expectantly. But of course, she knew me like the back of her hand so before I could speak she had her arms over my neck and said,
“Just sway with me.”
And so I did. My heart was pounding in my chest like it was going to pop out and kiss her for me.
Why was I even being like this? Did my flirty ballsy act officially die?
We lived together, spent every waking moment together, and yet that night more than ever I wanted her to be mine. I suppose it was special since she was the one holding onto me, just for a second it didn’t feel like an empty pursuit. I knew that when the morning fell, things would be the same again, and then we’d go home into our apartment and keep going about our business as if I don’t love her more than anyone else in this world.
“So, how are you liking Galbana?” I asked quietly, in awe of how magical this stupid country can be sometimes.
“I love it. It’s beautiful.” She said, but when she did she never once looked away from my eyes.
I gazed into hers with the same severity and chuckled.
“Thank you for taking me here.” She crooned.
Before I even had the chance to melt at her sweetness, her head shot up and she pecked me softly on the lips, standing on tiptoes. She exploded into giggles and I just stood there, stunned.
“Mia did you just kiss me?” I asked in disbelief.
“Yeah~” She replied with a sing-songy voice, still holding on to me. It’s a good thing she was since I felt as if I was going to drop dead from shock, and probably sheer joy.
My cheeks hurt from the, probably ludicrous, expression I was making.
“Why, how bold of you.” I teased as I caressed her cheek with my hand. She didn’t flinch away from this touch which I counted as a win. We swayed for a few more seconds until the flirt in me finally got the memo.
“May I return the favour?” I suggested cheekily.
Mia nodded, also smiling massively. I rested my other hand on her face as well.
She gave a little hiccup.
And then it hit me,
“Mia, are you drunk?”
“ Hic - probably…” She replied guiltily.
I dropped my hands from her face immediately. When this passed she was going to kill me.
“Have you even drunk before? Woman, you just kissed me?!? How are you this shit-faced?” I demanded, while also imagining how tomorrow I’m somehow going to get kicked out of an apartment signed under my name.
She looked at the ground in embarrassment, “I don’t really drink…”
I frowned, “Well, how much did you have?”
“Dunno” She replied.
“Oh boy,” I grabbed her by the shoulders and spun her in the direction of the boarding house we were staying in, “that’s it we’re going to bed.”
“No!” Mia whined.
“Come on.” I pushed her gently away from the site of the festival.
“I wanna party.” She moaned some more.
Never thought I would live to hear her say that. I sighed, as cute as she was, she was not in her right mind.
“Trust me, you’re gonna thank me in the morning…”
Somebody please let me know if u like these characters and wanna know more about them and their world because I will make that happen!
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...I love how I'm working on my WIP and it's supposed to be "canon compliant" or at least "canon compatible." But like... 15×18 except Michael's confirmed to be wearing a vacation t-shirt he got with Adam, and most likely pajama pants (or it could be jeans).
So I guess that's how the Winchesters find him.
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If you're writing fanfiction, and lately you just feel like, well, maybe your writing is well-constructed, and logical, and it has plot twists and cool action and tropes and the language is alright, but you just feel like it's just missing something, let me remind you: feeling.
A story lives and dies on feeling, on soul. All the technical skill in the world doesn't matter if there's no soul it can bring out. Remember what you felt about what you wrote and let that bleed through, or shine through, even if that means it's unpolished or unrefined or leaves a plothole.
Don't be afraid to put bits of mirrors into it in which you can see yourself; that's what makes it come alive.
Obviously, this works from the other side as well. If it has soul, if you're letting the things that matter to you matter, if you're pouring your heart into the story itself and not just into making it, it will shine through. And it won't matter if your words are a little rough around the edges or there's a plothole or if the pacing is off. If a subject matters to you, there's no guarantee it will matter to the reader; but what's universal to reading is not that you agree with someone, but that you instinctively feel with them. If you feel it, and you allow it to matter, they will feel with you. If you don't feel with the kid with the shattered dreams waiting for something, anything to happen and spur them into action, then the most eloquent writing technique will make it seem empty and lifeless, unimportant.
If you feel strongly with what you're writing, technique usually pales in comparison because your instinct of expressing yourself takes over what you would usually have to construct diligently.
Just. Allow yourself to pour life into your story, and it will come alive.
#long post#It's not 3am but I'm still tired enough to have these sorts of thoughts#Just. I feel like at some point the stories I read and wrote in MHA stopped being about what the authors felt about the show and more about#what they thought about the show#which isn't bad but if you're going to write a 100k analysis of what would have happened if ... then maybe trying#to make it into a story and stopping halfway through because you forgot to add in the feeling#is not the best course of action#Sure Izuku is devastated after the rooftop#but we've all seen so many takes of that scene it has gotten really tough to still ... feel something about it#so it's kind of like saying this is a major emotional moment for the character so I'll try to make it matter#but I can't bring myself to care#But I want to get to the parts I'm interested in!#Well yes but like. If you don't have the patience to write the build-up#then don't force yourself to write it out#We all know what happened. Gloss over it with five sentences that tell us something new#sentences that evoke emotions. Or hold them#Which is the same thing.#Basically what I'm saying is#The best writing is when you're emotional and when you don't care about what you write the reader won't either#I'm not nearly coherent enough for this.#Just. Care#Yes I'm bitter I nearly planned one of my stories to death again bc I nailed every detail down in advance and then lost interest#How could you tell#But as soon as I noticed - I don't think I'm the only one with that problem#So many plot points seem to happen bc the author feels they have to happen and it has no emotional impact bc they don't care#On the other hand. They are writing and I am currently not so who's really clowning themselves here?
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axolot-of-ideas · 2 years
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tw: descriptions of blood, gore, violence and death
~~~~
Bad wasn’t supposed to be here
His knees rooted firmly against the ground as he kneeled.
He hurt
Every part of him hurt
He wasn’t supposed to be here
He wasn’t supposed to ever be here.
Bad was not meant to win.
Bad was not meant to play.
-
But here he was.
Knees on blood-soaked stone.
Skin coated in deep purple and reds,
Stained in bruises, blood, and omens.
He could not tell you if it was his own
His body torn by blades and arrows.
Mangled by traps and explosions.
His ribcage a cavern, victim to the backend of an axe
His back was tattered cloth from an axe that should’ve respawned him
Bad has always preferred swords
He collapsed on to himself
His forearms against the stone warm with lungs and hearts
His own straining for something
The pain that pulsed across his back, every breath and every beat tearing him from his dying breaths to memories long forgot
-
Losing his wings were almost as painful as gaining them
The surgical slits across his skin as hands reached between to tug them out from his flesh
The agony from before anyone realized
The agony of his bones pulsing and trying to tear their way out of his skin
He would compare the two now
except for now he is alone
Collapsed against the snow as his back convulsed in pain
Every breath, every beat pulsing more pain from the limbs trying to tear from under his skin
-
He wasn’t meant to be here.
He won.
He should be able to leave now.
He can leave now he realized in bittersweet thought.
Grasping at the floor around him, he searched for something.
His hands grabbing past his long discarded mask until his hand wrapped around a hilt.
He plunged his blade through his torso, running past healing wounds from the arrow before
His hands were stained in blood as they stayed limply around the handle of his swordy
How much blood was his own or other’s, he didn’t want to know.
He grinned to the moon.
Teeth stained in sadness and coughed up blood
Lips smiling, stained red and in relief.
He’s won.
He’s won the game he never asked to play.
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awkwardsmileyy · 3 months
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She is under the salt water, she sees the blurry fire that is on the thin surface, it comes from her beloved boat, did anyone survive? Probably not, her lungs struggle not to release the rest of the oxygen that still keeps her body alive. The fire path is obstructed by something, a piece of wood she thinks at first, but when her eyes, burning from the salt, finally focus she realizes, that wood was what she wished it to be while the dismembered and burned body of one of her companions goes towards the depth with her. their eyes were still open, they were looking at each other, they shared a meal yesterday, a bottle of rum at night hidden from the Captain on their watch shifts, now they are both lost, never to have their names remembered, next to a heart damned at the bottom of the sea.
Her lungs were begging for rest, and for the last time of her adventure she looked up at the sky. The light was no longer seen, the shadows of the fire almost like hallucinations appeared in the distance, The only records that there ever was a great Leviathan ship were the pieces of iron, wood and bodies that now reached the bottom of the endless sea. So this world that was so cruel, that took away so many things from her, will also take away her last view of the sky, the salty pirate thought. But she was never one to put her head down and let people dictate rules to her, so she closed her eyes and thought about a beautiful, starry night with her brothers singing some stupid sea shanty and let all the oxygen in her lungs be released.
The only person who dictates her death is herself.
The pirate wakes up, why does she wake up? Her throat is burning and her legs don't work, the water is so heavy around her, her entire chest spasms. There's no air, there's no air, there's no-
This this second? the third? no, definitely the second time she's been back…right?
The fifth time, she doesn't try. She doesn't move, she asks the sea why this torture, and then she begs.
The sea does not answer to her.
But something, something deeper than the sea, something that was there before she was there, before she was born, not something…but someone, answers. A laugh, so thick that makes your spine hurt and your nose bleed, that has the same feeling as being stabbed by a blunt knife with a good layer of rust. That what answers her. With just a few seconds of his laughter in her skull, the pirate's remaining sanity is gone, what did she do so bad? She killed, stole and lied, but does she really deserve the tortures of the sea devil himself as purgatory? she proclaimed to the god that did not have the courage to descend so deep into the sea, so close to Jones's domain.
"no, no, my little child, your body still has use…" the voice spoke calmly in the pirate's mind as if trying to calm her down, but the voice was reflected by all parts of her skull, it was as if Millions of horrified voices spoke at the same time, begging her to escape, for her to help them, and all the pirate managed to do was once again have a beautiful encounter with Lady Death"
"You mortals are so…how can I say this? sensitive to water." the voice says with a humorous tone and every time the voice touched the pirate's mind, she had horrendous and grotesque visions of all the people who had been in this same situation, all those voices, she will became one of them."You are mine now, and as I am a benevolent god, I will give you two years on the surface, you died, you understand that, yes? I am saving you." Something is happening, the pirate's heart is hurting so much, was she headed for darkness once again? No, this is different, she saw the disgusting green light coming out of her chest, with a scream of agony and the salt water entering her lungs again, Jones continues to speak.
"I will beneficially give these two years of life back to this corpse of yours, and after that you will travel under my flag for eternity." The pirate has already been stabbed several times, but none of these pains hurt as much as James' strange magic in her chest. "You will hear the call, just be careful, if you fall into the waters again, even before my call, you will be mine." The pain rises through her chest, through her throat and into her face, and the pirate feels the pain, the scorching pain, of something being dug into her cheeks and pulling, pulling, up to her ears. a grotesque, bloody smile carved into her skin by nothing, but thoughts of a monster who considers himself a god. "You are special I feel, I needed to mark you, so that my eyes up there can find you when the time comes." The cuts burned as the salt water entered the wound, every minute a faint horrifying green light flashed from within the wound and with it brought a horrible pain to her chest, a reminder of the curse.
"now, entertain me, let's see how far can you run, my beautiful, beautiful child."
The pirate takes a deep breath.
And then she starts coughing. Sea water pouring from her lips, then the sweet kiss of mercy, air flows into her lungs when she inhales. She takes even deeper breaths, digging her gloved hands into the dry sand? The pirate blinks against the blinding sunlight, her eyes sore from the salt water. She is on a beach, the water of a light wave comes close to her sand-covered boots, and with terror and despair, she gets away from that cursed water as quickly as possible. After this movement she stood still, a pirate afraid of the sea? Is this what she was now? Was she doomed to flee from something she loved so much forever?
She was a coward, to be a pirate you can be anything but a coward, she gets up and starts her new journey walking as far away from the sea as possible. The screams of despair still echoed in her mind, if to avoid becoming one of those voices she has to run, hide and disappear with her name, she will be the first cowardly pirate then.
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tortademaracuya · 9 months
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Im like 5 seconds away from verbally vomiting how the whole soulmates thingy works in-universe but like very shittily
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dakotalun · 9 months
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"Oops" | Eddie Munson
pairing: Eddie Munson X Fem Reader
summary: Part 1--Eddie "accidentally" sends a tasteful pic to his best friend.
warnings: mutual pining, pet names (sweetheart), strong language, description of naked Eddie
word count: 3.4k
Part 2
a/n: went a little crazy at 3am the other night and wrote this. Part two will be up later this week!! Luv y'all <3
*******NOT MY GIF, CREDIT TO OWNERS*******
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Eddie is your best friend of many years, the two of you being inseparable from the moment you met. So when you got a text from him tonight you don’t think much of it, figuring it was just a dumb meme he saw or a random thing from today.
What you didn’t expect to see was a picture of Eddie standing in his bathroom, towel slung over his shoulders with a prominent boner happening.
His hair is wet as if he just got out of the shower and hadn’t bothered to dry it yet. The long dark brown locks stick to his neck and chest in a way that can only be described as godly. The tattoos on his skin are glistening but covered by the towel around his neck and as you move your eyes downward the path of hair that leads to his dick is delicious.
And talking about his dick it is, mag-fucking-nificent! The way that it hangs there, the tip swollen and red, leaking the smallest bit of precum. It has your mouth watering.
You nearly choked on your own spit when you saw it. Never in a million years did you think that Eddie would be sending you of all people nudes. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t wonder what he was packing but you never really indulged in those thoughts, until now. You couldn’t tear your eyes away from the screen, memorizing every little detail in the photo.
Eddie sends another text but you’re too distracted to see what it is. Then a stream of texts start flooding in from him.
‘SHIT!’
‘I DID NOT NMEAN TO SNED YIU THAT!’
‘IGNORE THE PICTUREA’
‘HOW THE HELL DO I DELETE THE PIC?!?!?!’
‘GOD I AM SOSOSOSOSOSOSSOO SOORRY!!’
You giggle at his frantic typing, noting all the typos. Curiosity gets the better of you and you scroll up a little to see what he had said after he sent the picture. You’re eyes go wide at the words displayed on your screen.
‘Couldn’t stop thinkin’ about you. Jerked off twice while in the shower and I’m still hard. Wish you were here with me right now ;)’
You had no clue who this was really meant for but if it was meant for you you would 100 percent be on your way to him right now. The bottom half of the picture stares back at you as your eyes acan over the text again and again. You can’t deny the small hint of wetness that you feel on your underwear while looking at the two.
Twice? He came twice and is still hard. Whoever he thought about must be really hot if he can go 3 rounds without breaking a sweat. Could he go more?
Your thoughts were interrupted by your phone receiving a call, from none other than Eddie himself. You sit up in bed and pull your knees towards you as you answer his call.
“Sweetheart I am so so so sorry I sent you that. It was clearly meant for someone else. If I had known it was your contact that I was on I would have never sent that at all. I want you to know that I don’t go around sending nudes to everyone or anything, I’m not a slut I was just-”
“Eddie it’s fine. No need to apologize. I figured it wasn’t meant for me anyways.” It pains you a little at the thought that someone else was supposed to receive that message from your best friend.
“I’m still sorry. Is there any way I can make it up to you?” His voice sounds smooth like spreading butter onto fresh pancakes.
“Hmm,” You fake thinking about what you want even though you know exactly what it is you want, “You’ve gotta tell me who that text was really meant for.” Silence. For a whole minute there is just silence on Eddie’s end, you’d think he was dead if it weren’t for the fast pace of his breathing.
“Sweetheart,” The nickname is not helping the situation you have going on right now, “You don’t mean that. Can’t I just take you to breakfast or buy you a new outfit?”
“Nope.” You respond popping the ‘p’ as you say it. “Either tell me who it was meant for or I send it to the groupchat.” You were bluffing. You couldn’t let the others see him like that, that was for your eyes only. Not that anyone needed to know that.
“You wouldn’t dare,” His voice turned deep and threatening.
“Try. Me.” You challenge back.
Eddie groans, “Fine. You win,” A smile spreads across your face, “It was meant for Callie. This girl in my chem class, we’ve been talking for a little bit.”
You’re a mix of emotions right now; happy that Eddie found someone he’s interested in and took his shot, confused because he never told you about it, sad because you thought he trusted you with things like that, and slightly jealous because you want to be the one Eddie sent nudes to, purposefully.
“Sweetheart? You still there?” You completely forget that you’re still on the phone with Eddie until he says something.
“Uh yeah yeah I’m here. I’m um happy for you Ed. Glad you found someone. Look I gotta go to sleep, big test tomorrow, talk later. Bye.” You hang up before he can say anything else. 
Why did you feel this way about all this? You shouldn’t be thinking of Eddie in this way, he was your best friend. Best friends don’t think about going down on each other, or the way it would feel to have his cock inside you, or the moans he would release when he finally cums in you.
You shake it off and lay back down, setting your phone on your nightstand to charge. You try for half an hour to fall asleep but your mind can’t stop thinking about that damn picture. So you unlock your phone and go back to your messages with Eddie, looking to see if he deleted the picture or not. And to your luck it was the latter, the picture and text below still there for your viewing pleasure.
You’re still horny from the initial thought of him so it doesn’t take long for your hand to wander under your shorts and underwear to your clit. The thought that your fingers were his and the way he would whisper in your ear egging you on to finish.
The images of him jerking himself off in the shower flood you, his hand on the cold tiles, water hitting his back as he fists his cock, rubbing it slowly at first but becoming impatient and going faster until he cums all over the wall and his hand.
The image of his face when he does and the moans that would leave his mouth is what throws you over the edge yourself. Wishing it were him between your legs pulling it from you not your own fingers. Finally your body is tired enough to let you go to sleep, dreaming of Eddie once more.
---
You’re sitting with Eddie and the rest of Hellfire at lunch a week later. Neither of you have talked about what happened that night, both too embarrassed to say anything.
Things were normal though, Eddie would pick you up and drop you off to and from school. You’d talk on the phone every night about whatever happened that day that the other wasn’t there for. You liked the thought that the text didn’t hinder your friendship but you can’t help but be a little jealous about Eddie fucking someone else. It’s not like you were expecting him to confess his hidden undying love for you the next day but the realization that Eddie really did send you that accidentally; hurt.
The freshman are talking about some video game coming out when Eddie lean over to you.
“Whatcha’ thinking about?” There’s a smile on his face, one that you always loved seeing.
“Nothing,” You go back to eating your fruit.
“Alrighty then. Hey I was wondering what time you wanted to come over tonight?”
Your eyes grow wide, mind going back to the text, “Why?”
“Um it’s Wednesday. Horror movie marathon night, remember?” His head cocks to the side a little, his hair falling into his face. It reminds you of a dog questioning what it’s owner has in their hand.
“Oh right yeah. Um I don’t know if I can make it tonight.” That was a lie, you had nothing going on. But being in the trailer alone with Eddie after knowing what he looks like naked is not what you need right now.
“Awe come on! I rented Scream, Saw, and Halloween for tonight. You can’t make me watch them all alone,” He lowers his voice and leans closer, “What if I need protection from the bad guys?” His big doe eyes large and pleading with you.
You roll your eyes and push his face away from you, “Ugh fine. I’ll be there, how’s 8?”
“Perfect! I’ll order the pizzas, do you think you could make those amazing cookies for us?”
“You mean for you?”
“No. I mean for us, I would never eat all the cookies myself.”
“You did like 3 weeks ago! There were 30 cookies there and I had none of them.” You stare at him as he thinks back to then.
“Nope don’t remember which means it didn’t happen. So will you?” There are those puppy dog eyes again.
“Whatever but I swear if you eat all of them again I’ll castrate you.”
Eddie’s hands fly to his groin, protecting it from your threat. “Ouch, sweetheart. Didn’t know you hated my dick that much.”
I don’t. Just hate that it’s not mine. You thought, but you just rolled your eyes and continued on eating lunch until the bell rang.
---
Eddie rushed around his room looking for his favorite shirt when you showed up for movie night. You let yourself in, per usual and set the cookies down on the coffee table before heading to Eddie’s room. He was squating in front of his closet when you come in, you don’t announce yourself just stand there staring at his back.
He got a few new tattoos since last summer, two of which on his back. A skull and crossbones along with a knife wrapped in barbed wire. You haven’t seen them in person yet, it still being too cold to sit out in the sun. But looking at them now was a pleasure, the detail popping out as his muscles flex.
Eddie huffs and stands, defeated about not finding the shirt he wanted. He turns around and finds you standing in his doorway.
“Jesus! Why didn’t you say you were here?” His hand is over his heart as he catches his breath from the unintentional jump scare.
“I texted you like 20 minutes ago that I was on my way. Figured you knew I’d be here soon,” You say as you enter his room fully to sit on his bed.
“I did not see the text, I was in the shower,” The mention of this brought back memories of the photo, and what you did whilst looking at it, “Anyways pizza should be here soon and I’ve got beers and soda in the fridge.”
Eddie walks around you to his dresser, grabbing a random shirt and throwing it on. You’re sad at the loss of his bare skin but quickly shake the thought away. You get up from his bed and head to his living room, Eddie following in toe.
“So what are we watching first? I’ve seen Scream a few times but the other two I haven’t seen,” Eddie remarks as he grabs two beers from the fridge, opening them before handing you one.
You mumble a thanks before taking a sip, the bitter liquid coating your tastebuds. “I’ve seen Scream and Saw but not Halloween. Heard good things about it though, at least that’s what Robin said, Steve had other opinions.”
“Lemme guess pretty boy hated it and wished he never saw it?” Eddie laughs as he sets up Halloween on the tv.
“Yeah pretty much,” You laugh along. The thought of your friend sitting there watching the movie curled up in a blanket next to Robin bringing a smile to your face.
Eddie finishes setting up the movie and walks back the kitchen. He grabs a bag of chips and some dip before returning to your side on the couch. He opens the chips and pops one in his mouth, crunching it loudly.
You smile at the normalcy of everything right now, it’s as if nothing ever happened between the two of you. Which if we’re being honest nothing really did happen, Eddie just sent you a nude on accident. It’s not like you kissed or anything. Not that you’d hate it if you did.
You snack on the chips and dip with him while waiting for the pizza to show up, never starting the movie without it. The two of you talk about nothing in particular while you sit there. Eddie tells you about the upcoming DnD campaign he’s been working on.
His eyes lighting up and hands flying around erratically as he explains what he planned, the animation in his character brings an even bigger smile to your face.
Just as Eddie concludes his explanation, inviting you to come sit in and watch it at the end, the doorbell rings notifying the both of you that the pizza was here and it was now time for movie night to begin.
Eddie pays the guy and happily walks over to the couch and sets the food on the table in front of the two of you, he can’t even wait til the movie starts playing to begin eating. You laugh at him as he opens and closes his mouth quickly trying to cool the hot pizza in his mouth, you just hit play and start watching the movie.
The pizza is gone, same with half the bag of chips and the cookies. Eddie actually let you eat  a few of them before he scarfed down the others. You’re nearing the end of Scream, the third and final movie of the night when you look at your phone for the time. 12:25 stares back at you, you groan knowing that your parents are going to kill you for coming home so late on a school night.
Eddie hears you and turns to see why you made that noise. You just wave him off and go back to watching the movie, watching as Skeet Ulrich gets shot for the final time in the head. A few minutes later the credits roll and Eddie turns off the tv, letting the trailer fade into silence.
“Wanna tell me what that groaning was about?” Eddie asks turning to face you completely.
“Nothing, just didn’t realize that it had gotten so late. Parents are gonna kill me if I go home at this hour.”
“So just stay here,” He says with no hesitation, “You still have a few clothes here after last movie night. They’re just siting in my drawer.”
You think about it for a minute. You and Eddie have had sleepovers in the past, nothing special about them, just two people sharing a bed, occasionally cuddling because of the small size of it. But now the thought of it made you nervous, having him so close to you, so near yet not being able to touch him. It killed you, but it’s better than going back home right now and having your mom and dad rip you a new one.
“Alright, I’m gonna need to shower though. Coach had us run the mile today at practice and I still feel disgusting.”
“Yeah no problem, you go ahead and shower, I’ll clean up here.” He stands and starts clearing the trash from the table. You get up too and head into his bathroom, but no matter how hot the water is or how long you stand under it you can't get the thought of the picture and the words under it out of your mind.
He was right here, jerking off to the thought of someone. You scold yourself for thinking about him like that, again. But you couldn’t help it.
Recently you’ve thought about him more and more; his smile, the dimples that show when he’s really happy, how animatedly he talks, the way his hair is always unkempt but still looks so damn soft. You thought about him in ways you never did before seeing that picture; his arms, his muscles, his hands, his rings. Everything about him turned you on and you needed it to go away.
Eddie finished up cleaning and sat down on his bed, beer in hand while he took out his metal lunchbox for a joint. You walk into his room, towel wrapped around yourself, hair dripping wet from the shower. He stops his actions to just stare at you, the same way you did earlier that night.
“Uh could I borrow some clothes? I don’t have anything to sleep in,” You say wrapping your arms under your boobs, pushing them up ever so slightly.
Eddie clears his throat, “Yeah, sure.” He gets up and walks over to his dresser, rummaging through it to look for something you can wear tonight. He pulls out a pair on your underwear that you “left” there a while back and one of his Hellfire shirts. You denied his offer of some pants, saying they would be way to big on you and you’d rather just sleep in the shirt.
Eddie’s mind went straight to the gutter at that thought, you sleeping next to him, in just his Hellfire shirt and a pair of underwear he stole from you. His dick was growing hard just thinking about it. He quickly got back to looking for his joint and lighting it upon it’s appearance. He took a few hits while you changed in the bathroom, his mind slowly fogging over.
You return, hair still slightly wet with the towel in your hand. You toss it into his hamper before laying on his bed, grabbing his beer and taking a sip. You lay back and close your eyes, letting the serenity of this moment wash over you. Eddie offers you a hit but you decline, being that you don’t ever mix weed and booze together.
He finishes the joint while you finish his beer. The two of you just sitting there with the light sound of whatever record Eddie has playing. Your thoughts are quiet for the most part, just soaking in the time with your best friend, until you think of something. A question you’ve been meaning to ask for a little bit.
“Eddie?”
“Hmm?” He responds head leaning back onto the wall where a headboard should be.
“Can I ask you a question?”
“Sure, hit me.” You reach your hand out and hit him in the thigh.
“Ouch! Not literally, I meant with the question, sweetheart.”
“I know,” You giggle.
“Brat,” He mumbles back.
“Anyways, I was gonna ask -and you don’t have to answer this if you don’t want to it’s just something I’ve been thinking about- but did you really not know it was me you were sending that picture to?” The words lay heavy on your tongue as you say them aloud. You’ve been thinking about this for a while, it’s hard not to.
How did he not know it was you he was texting, your name was right there at the top of the screen. And if he was sending it to someone else how could he not double-check to make sure he wasn’t sending it to someone like Wayne or Robin.
He’s quiet for a moment, thinking about the best way to tell you that, yes he did know it was you he was sending it to. And yes he knew it was stupid but he wanted to try something to see if you felt the same way about him that he does you. Eddie’s loved you for about a year and a half now, never saying anything to anyone in fear of running your friendship.
But that night he was watching a show and one of the characters did this thing where they pretended to send a text to someone “they didn’t mean to”, to see how they’d respond. He thought that maybe this was an easy way of figuring out how you felt about him. But when you didn’t respond to his photo or texts he got scared and called you. Needing to clarify what he sent, and why.
Eddie Taglist: @ali-r3n @dixontardis
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kakujis · 11 months
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do you love me?;
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tokrev ver.
synopsis: you/they wake them/you up at 3am.
ft + wc: isagi yoichi, michael kaiser, oliver aiku. around 2k
warnings: gn!reader, no set timelines, pet names, situationship (oliver) extremely! soft! oliver!!, slightly angsty (oliver), slight jealousy (kaiser), kaiser's is suggestive, none really for isagi! aaand that should be it!
a/n: i finally finished something!! i've been in such a rut not only with writing but with reading. TnT. hopefully i can write more once my semester is finished! anyways, i wrote oliver's in basically one sitting kicking my feet n screaming. also ily to zen cus i dropped like the entire fic in their dms LMFAOO. and ily to su for proofreading for me!! hope u enjoy ♡.
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isagi:
you always saw the twinkle in isagi yoichi’s eyes when he talked about soccer. it was cute, charming, and part of what attracted you to him. when the two of you finally started dating, soccer was very much a part of your lives. you’d pop in at practice whenever you could and much to his delight, you’d even try to learn about his idols and the game. 
when you studied it on your own, it was fine, you could go at your own pace. but when isagi was there, it was a little different. he always had so much to say, so many techniques and teams to go over. he was like a walking soccer encyclopedia and you appreciated it, even when it got a little overwhelming. 
but tonight, as he talked your ear off about noel noa for the nth time, you found yourself dozing off. the black haired striker’s eyes were glued to the match he was playing on the tv, every so often rewinding or slowing down a play to explain it. you tried your best, really, to stay awake but it was nearing 3am and soon enough yoichi was speaking to himself. 
“man, that was sick!” he exclaims. he’s about to ask your opinion when he finally looks back to see your head in your arms, asleep. “…oh.” 
he rouses you out of sleep, shaking your shoulder gently. when you awaken you’re met with his pouting face. you blink off the drowsiness, rubbing your eyes. “sorry i dozed off…” you reach for the remote, but he stops you. “yoichi?” 
“do you love me?” you’re caught off guard by the seriousness in his voice and the intensity of his gaze. 
you nod, “of course i do.” 
“say it.” it’s not uncharacteristic for him to be intense at times, but the glint in his eye is something you usually only see when he’s playing. you didn’t think you’d see it now and it’s a bit amusing. 
“i love you, yoichi.” you say, a smug grin on your face as you poke at his pouty cheeks. “aww, are you upset?” 
snapping out of it, he waves your hand away, slightly turning while his cheeks blush bright red. “…no.” 
“my baby,” you coo, continuing to reach over and squish his cheeks, “i’m sorry for falling asleep, yoi.”
“it’s okay…” he mumbles, enjoying the attention, “i didn’t realize you were so sleepy.” 
“well, it is 3am…” you giggle, pointing to his alarm clock. 
it’s cute how fast his head whips around to look. “oh… my bad.” he apologizes, sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck. 
“don’t worry about it,” you shrug, before getting up and pulling at his hands. “let’s go to sleep, yeah?” 
but isagi pauses, conflicted, before glancing back at the tv. “… just one more play?” 
“yoichi!” you whine, the idea of cuddling with your boyfriend in bed being extremely appealing. 
“please?” he pleads, hands clasped, and you sigh, giving in to his doe eyes. 
“fine. one more. that’s it and then we’re going to bed.” you say, settling down next to him. but if you’re being honest, you’re never immune to isagi yoichi.
the light in his eyes as he rambles and talks to you about his favorite thing always overwhelms anything else. you love him, wholly and fully. and maybe that’s why you don’t mention anything as one play turns to two, which then turns into the entire match. not a single word escapes you as he loads up the next game, telling you “this next one is insane.” 
it’s isagi’s turn to fall asleep and as the sun peeks over the horizon, you press a peck to his cheek as you wrap a blanket over his shoulders. 
“good night, yoichi.” 
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kaiser:
michael kaiser was many things, first and foremost a soccer player, secondly, a striker with a god complex and most importantly, your boyfriend. well, perhaps most important to you and although you’re mostly able to cast aside that doubt to love him fully, there are still moments when you just have to hear it. 
it’s 3am and kaiser’s in deep sleep, evident by the subtle snores coming from him. in contrast, you’re fully awake and sitting next to him, one finger trailing the expanse of his skin, from the curve of his cheek to the line of his jaw. he stirs slightly, but nonetheless stays asleep and that annoys you. 
“michael,” you whine, prodding at his cheek, “do you love me?” his eyelids flutter, face contorting to the singsong of your voice. 
“huh?” he responds, eyes opening and brows furrowing into a scowl you continue to prod. he grabs your hand, pulling it away from him. “what is it?” 
“do you love me?” you repeat, happily humming at his pretty face. 
he tsks before grumbling out a “nein.” he huffs before turning over. 
you pause, before scowling yourself. “what did you just say?” 
“nein.” he reiterates, closing his eyes. “goodnight.” 
you scoff, before shaking him again. “hey… seriously!” but it’s useless. kaiser’s decided it’s time for bed. truth be told, you should probably get some sleep too. but it’s annoying when you do feel like a side character in his story and not his co-lead. fine, you can be petty too. 
you round up your pillows, sighing and making sure to climb over him as you get off the bed. he catches your wrist as you try to leave, brow arched. 
“where are you going?” he asks, confused.
“the couch.” you deadpan. 
“why?” 
“i don’t wanna sleep next to someone who doesn’t love me.” you pout, hugging your pillow tightly. 
“it was a joke, liebe.” he sighs, pulling you down back into bed. “of course, i love you.” 
“hmm… you’re just pacifying me.” you say, hoping he’ll get the hint and finally give you some of the affection you’ve been craving. 
and he does, rolling his eyes before pressing a deep kiss to your lips. he makes sure to give you a few more afterwards, your giggle floating around his ears. “happy now?” 
“very.” you smile and he smiles back, but you can’t let him think he’s won just yet. “hey, i have a joke too.” 
“yeah? and you think it’s better than mine?” he teases and you grin even wider, nodding excitedly. “i’m all ears.” 
“okay. make sure you listen and like, really listen.” you command and he nods, moving his ear closer to your lips. “you’re a better player than isagi yoichi.” 
his face falls immediately and you burst out laughing, pushing off of him and grabbing your pillow again. you figure after your little stint, you’ll seriously be sleeping on the couch. 
“super funny, right? i should be a comedian.” you muse, before leaning down and giving him a peck on the cheek. “good night, emperor.” 
you turn to leave again, but kaiser’s quick to pull you down and underneath him. you yelp as he straddles you, pinning your wrists above your head. he’s frighteningly close, the tips of his blonde and blue hair hovering over your skin. 
there’s one thing about him that you don't know and it’s that he’ll never admit how soft you make him, how it’s actually he who melts at the sound of your voice. how it’s him who wants to hear nothing but endless praise from you, so maybe he did get a little mad at that joke.
“m-michael?” you squeak, squirming under his hold, “what are you doing?” 
“what do you mean? i’ve gotta remind you who the best striker in the world is.” he states and you recognize that look in his eyes. you didn’t think it’d rile him up this much. 
“babe, it was a joke!” 
he barks a laugh as you squirm harder underneath him. “it’s gonna be a long night, liebe.” 
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oliver: 
“hey oliver, do you love me?” 
perhaps not the best time to ask, neon bright 3:00 AM displayed on your alarm clock lets you know that. but still, the beating of oliver aiku’s heart that drums through your ears prompts you to ask anyway. 
he’s asleep, or so you think, and shirtless, with the press of your cheek against his chest, his skin feels warm. shyly, you stay looking at the wall, sometimes trailing down to his limp hand. meanwhile, your fingers ghost over his skin, writing little “i love you”s and infinity signs like an incantation or a spell. 
“dumb question,” you continue, “i know you don’t.” you give a small smile, it’s how the situation between you two works. you can sleep together, hold hands, maybe even call each other ‘partners’, but you never breach that threshold. he’s always just out of reach.
but oliver is awake, eyes stirred open by the figure eights you’ve been writing on him. he’s been listening to you the entire time, eyes blinking up at the ceiling. 
“well… in case you were wondering, i think i love you,” you confess, your heart thumping wildly, “like a lot, actually. do you…  think i’m stupid?” you pause, before opening your mouth to say that he doesn’t have to answer, but oliver cuts you off. 
“not really.” he says, the hand that was resting on your waist, starting to stroke your skin. 
you freeze before pushing yourself up and off of him. “hey! h-how long have you been awake?” 
he smirks and you hate the way your heart flutters, “a while,” he sits up, “hey, i love myself too.” 
you deflate a little, it’s too much of the same, the same jokes and the brushing off of feelings. but you should know this by now, that he doesn’t love you. “yeah, just not me.” you look away, wishing he would lie to you just one time. “i should go-“ 
he reaches over, grabbing your chin between his fingers and leveling your gazes together. “i never said that.” 
you blink, wide-eyed and you’re not sure what to do or even what to say. and while you’re sure your heart is beating so fast you swear he can hear it, you’re also emboldened, mustering up the courage to ask, “never said what?” but your voice comes out small, whispery and featherlight. 
“that i don’t love you.” he says. he doesn’t break eye-contact, pretty two-tone eyes locked on yours. 
you can’t help your emotions, the way they swell up in you overwhelmingly, as if you’re drowning in them. 
“do you love me, oliver?” you’re too happy to be embarrassed by the break in your voice when you say his name, too fixated on the way he touches you so gently. it’s like he can’t hurt you now, no matter what he’s done before. 
he nods, the hand on your chin moving to cup your cheek as he strokes his thumb reassuringly over your skin. he catches the tears that fall, thinking that it’s much better to see you happy cry than when he does something stupid. 
“could you say it? please?” you sniffle, placing a hand over his, keening into his touch. 
he gives a breathy laugh out of nervousness, before he clears his throat and says it, loud and clear. “i love you, y/n.” 
you laugh through your tears, relieved, because all the time you spent wondering was okay and the wait was worth it. the way it rolls off his tongue is so natural and so warm it has your head spinning. 
he brings up his other hand, wiping away at the tears that continue to fall. “c’mon baby, you’re gonna cry all night?” he teases, squishing your cheeks between his hands. 
“‘m not dreaming?” you mumble, shaking your head, “this is real? you really love me?” 
maybe when you wake up in the morning it’ll be different. maybe he’ll be back to the same old oliver, the one who deflects and dodges all your questions. so maybe it is a dream. but, if this is a dream… do they always feel so good? and is it possible to stay asleep? 
he hums, before asking, “does this feel real?” as he leans in to press a kiss to your lips. it’s sincere and authentic, the kind that makes your heart bloom. he pulls away, but only slightly to rest his forehead against yours. you nod and he grins, “good.”
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plsdonttakemyname · 25 days
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Boothill x G!n Reader
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A/n ; this post is literally inspired by this post on TikTok HDHAJBDHSJSJDH 'M CRYINFFG..... I'm so sorry I haven't posted for soooo goddamn long... forgive me if my writing has gotten even worse mggggrr .. Wrote this at 3am, please let me know if I did typos... :'3
Mentions ; Boothill, Cyborg body parts, Poor bby can't feel physical affections like hugs and hand holding :(..Fluff fluff fluff grrrr...I'm trying my best not to turn this into an angst..Modern Au (I guess?), :3 Reader uses lipstick (no gender mentioned), Use of nicknames for reader (Doll,Baby,Etc...), OOC BOOTYHILL :(...
.. 𝑳𝒊𝒑𝒔𝒕𝒊𝒄𝒌 𝑺𝒕𝒂𝒊𝒏𝒔 ..
You and Boothill have been dating for almost 2 years , right now he has you on his lap. You were testing out the lipstick you got recently on him and he agreed to it. His face now covered in different shades of lipsticks.
"mm, I kinda like this shade, what do you think about it 'hun?" he wrapped his arms around your waist while supporting you on his lap " I don't mind what shade of lipstick you use doll...you'd look absolutely stunning with anything" he answered as you smiled at his reply, leaning in to kiss his cheeks "Flatterer.." He lets out a small chuckle before leaning in again for another kiss "What can I say? I love my sweetheart this much" he said as you caress his cheeks, nuzzling her nose against his slightly while knowing it brings him comfort due to being the only place he can feel any real warmth. Yet you continue to show him you care in the small ways you can, showing you love him in these simple things. The both of you are resting on the couch and enjoying each other's company before he slowly speaks up and breaks the comfortable silence "Do my cyborg body parts bother you?" You were caught off guard by his sudden question. you shook your head, planting another kiss on his lips before answering him "No..of course not..what makes you say that?" He shrugged as he pulled you in closer in his arms while he nuzzled in the crook of your neck "Nothin'..I'm just askin.." you wrapped your arms around his neck in response as you ran your fingers through his silky white long hair while he cuddled with you on the couch. Minutes have passed when you suddenly remembered that your boyfriend is still covered in your lipstick..."Baby I think we should wash the lipstick away before it stains your face" with a few moments of silence, he pulled away and looked at you "good..let it stain then."
PLEASE THIS IS HORRIBLE WRITTEN,Im so sorry if I disappoint . :( my schedule has been very packed lately and I have to drive and pick my cousin up from school whenever I get free times.. Also wrote this at 4am without any sleep. I'm so sorry again if there's a grammar error. I feel so anxious when I post because I'm scared it's gonna be bad..but I'm trying my best despite having a packed schedule. But if you have any ideas, feel free to request , I'll try my best to take them when I'm free
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© 2024 plsdonttakemyname do not repost, copy, translate, modify.
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aethelwyneleigh27 · 8 months
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Cod Characters General Dating Headcanons (part one)
+ Random and Some bits of Chubby Fem S/O Headcanons with mentions of different nationality S/O
+ What type of BF/GF they would be
Including John Price, Simon "Ghost" Riley, John "Soap" MacTavish, Kyle "Gaz" Garrick, Alejandro Vargas, Rodolfo "Rudy" Parra
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3
Fem terms and pronouns like she/her are used for the reader
ꕥ HOPE YOU ENJOY! ꕥ
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My rules for requests and characters I can write for
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Please comment if you want to be added to the taglist, the next part or cod content alone.
Taglist: @marshmallowinamess
A/n: Hi lovelies! Lia here, I'm back after a nerve-wracking week of school. This is a bit short but I hope you enjoy it otherwise. God I fucking hate school. I wrote all of this in a cold room, a heat pad on me (because period cramps) and at 3am so any mistakes will be edited out as soon as I'm aware of it.
This is divided into a multiple part thing (I think 2-3?) because God knows I can't fit them all in one post because of the limited amount of gifs and photos. I'll add more to these in the future, some are longer than others because I can't think. Also because I can't write them all at once, that's a lot to write okay 😭
Disclaimers/warnings: Typical Cod things, OOC characters???, Unrealistic, Some suggestive themes and language, I'm so sorry but English is not my first language so please don't come after me. Most of the content I've seen are on TikTok and Tumblr I don't actually play the game but I love the characters so much, same with any other content I have for other video games.
Tiny sidenote: the reader in this has been describe to be shorter than the characters and has been mentioned to have a soft body rather than the muscular type.
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John Price
ꕥ (OH MY GOD LOOK AT HIS SMILEEE) (He's such a quokka)
ꕥ Price who literally is such a father figure, doesn't matter whether the relationship between you two is romantic or platonic. He often takes the dominant caring role.
ꕥ Doesn't smoke around you, doesn't matter if you insist he doesn't. He still won't and definitely will criticize you if you try or do smoke because he doesn't want you do end up like him.
ꕥ If there's a bit of an age gap between you, I'd say he's hesitant. Definitely afraid of what the rest of the task force thinks (He can't help it, they're basically his boys)
ꕥ John Price who wants to settle down with you, maybe have kids if you want but just a white picket fence life with you without the chaos that is war and his job.
ꕥ He only ever let's you have his hat, only when he gives it to you though. Most of the time it would be while you're out, he'd put it on your head from his. (Cowboy hat rule? I heard that in more respectful terms rather than sexual, it respectfully means that you are theirs)
ꕥ John Price who rests his chin at the top of your head no matter how much he needs to crouch down whenever hugging you from behind. Love doing it whenever you're busy doing something too. (Props for the effort because you cannot tell me he doesn't have back, neck and knee pains)
ꕥ Is constantly worried if you share the same line of work, like at first it was nothing but a tiny crush and slowly he finds himself caring about your well-being more and more over time.
ꕥ Can't help but think he's an acts of service type of guy, reaching up for things you need or better yet lifting you up so you can reach them and loves opening things for you like bottles or anything canned. (Girlies who get their nails done or wear press ons know this struggle ( I'm a press on girly)
ꕥ The kind of man who would turn on some oldies music and slow dance with you in the living room, your footsteps and breathing being the only other sounds as you smile at each other, foreheads against the other's.
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Simon "Ghost" Riley
ꕥ Ghost who is such Doberman/Black cat boyfriend. Like have you seen this man? He's so tall and intimidating, one distasteful look from him and if it was physically possible that person would drop dead.
ꕥ Ghost whose a chubby chaser through and through, he just looks for something different from what he's used to.
ꕥ Is definitely a tits kinda guy, doesn't matter how big or how small they are. He'll definitely play with them in some way during doing the you know what.
ꕥ Feels like you can take him and his size better because of your plush body. Has a size kink and likes seeing it bulge a bit when he's inside you.
ꕥ You're just so soft and warm, he wants something away from what he usually feels doing his job. Not really that touchy but he gets quite clingy within closed doors.
ꕥ Likes to squeeze your thighs, his grip on them would not falter. Doesn't matter whether it's in a sexual or domestic way.
ꕥ Thinks you deserve better than what he can offer and needs constant reassurance, never says it out loud but you pick up on what he feels. (please be patient with him)
ꕥ More often than not, he thinks you're quite fragile. Even if you can protect yourself, one of his ways of showing you he loves you is through protecting you. Hence the Doberman boyfriend scenario.
ꕥ Doesn't like PDA but knows when it's necessary, him placing his arm around your shoulder is enough to keep perverts in their places. If that rando is really that bold then they'll most likely end up with a few broken bones depending on how pissed Simon is.
ꕥ If you work alongside him, he'd constantly worry about your well-being but at the same time is conflicted because he's confident that he can protect you.
ꕥ Only you and the TF141 can call him Simon, he still feels uneasy when he gets called that but when it's you saying it, it doesn't sound as daunting to him. Still dislikes in in certain tones of voice because his name reminds him of his past.
ꕥ You've seen his face, it took a long time but after that he trusted you enough to show him. The fact that you didn't find his face revolting and even kissed his scars while cupping his face was enough for him to want to marry you.
ꕥ Isn't fully insecure about his face but has his moments. (You know like the voice line where soap asks him to take off his mask and asked him if he was ugly and Ghost said "Negative")
ꕥ Takes a little while to get him to open up and little things like letting you hold him takes him a bit of time to get used to because it makes him feel vulnerable.
ꕥ God forbid something were to happen to you and he couldn't do anything to stop it, Simon would lose his fucking mind.
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John "Soap" MacTavish
ꕥ Soap is a Golden Retriever boyfriend through and through. He's energetic, loyal and really affectionate.
ꕥ He's a lighthearted flirt at first because he doesn't wanna scare you off but damn does he gradually get bolder over time.
ꕥ Very hands on, touchy, and could be clingy at times unless you don't consent him, secretly always finding new ways to touch you.
ꕥ A sucker for cheek kisses, lips are his favorite but he can't help but break out a wide grin whenever you kiss his cheek. Can't help but feel kinda manly whenever you do.
ꕥ Adores making you laugh, no matter how stupid your sense of humor is he will absolutely say that joke if it gets a laugh out of you. Would be concerned if you had a dark sense of humor but will eventually get used to it. To describe it, hearing you laugh makes his heart feel full like in a content domestic way.
ꕥ Also, see the gif? You cannot tell me that he doesn't look at you that way because he absolutely would.
ꕥ Loves your weight against his body to the pint he's begging you to lay on him. You, him in the bed while he's shirtless with grey sweatpants on and you in your night clothes sharing each other's warmth with your head on his broad chest.
ꕥ Shows you silly and cute pet videos, especially the cat ones:
"[Name], look at this one!"
"Soap, we're not adopting a pet. Not right now at least"
ꕥ He was upset and gave you puppy eyes the whole time because the only time he had pet was when he was child, it was a hamster which was killed because it got sucked into the vacuum by his older sister.
ꕥ You're the only one allowed to tough his hair, he's very proud of his mohawk and will let you style it. Won't wear it out if you did something silly to it though.
ꕥ Soap who loves showing you off to everyone, loves light PDA but doesn't wanna potential put a target on your back.
ꕥ He definitely is the guy you want to take home to your family and friends (or found family <3), he's funny and easy to get along with. Very flirty with you but he'll straighten out because he's terrified on making a bad impression.
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Kyle "Gaz" Garrick
ꕥ (HE'S SO FREAKING UNDERRATED WITHIN THIS FANDOM)
ꕥ He gives Labrador boyfriend vibes, you can't help but want to take care of him.
ꕥ Gaz who literally had to do a double take when he first saw you, he turned to Soap with that "Are you seeing what I'm seeing?" look in a good way.
ꕥ Gaz who literally had to ask you out multiple times before you said yes thinking he's only doing it for a bet or a cruel joke.
ꕥ Constant reassurance from him because he doesn't want you to feel insecure about your looks because to him you are literally an angel.
ꕥ Loves to chill with you, cuddling and just relaxing. Maybe scrolling on TikTok occasionally and show you the funny ones he chuckled at.
ꕥ He has a sixth sense whenever you crave something, say you want chocolate or drink of some sort then he'd definitely being home whatever it is you we're craving without having to ask you.
ꕥ Kyle who has your Starbucks order memorized because he likes being the one to order things for you. Will playfully argue with you on who'll pay this time. (Don't even try anymore, he always wins anyway)
ꕥ Puts his hat on your head mostly when you're out, has done it the first time because it was hot out and the sun was in your eyes. He's picked it up from Price and once you smiled at him through the shade of his cap, he has not stopped doing it.
ꕥ Definitely a words of affirmation and acts of service kind of guy when it comes to love languages. Sometimes whenever he'd give you two thumbs up and a cheeky smile, you can't help but laugh a little.
ꕥ He's very thoughtful, so much so that he prides himself in knowing you better than anyone. Everytime you two go out to eat, when he gets something and know that you'll want to taste it (he knows damn well whether you'll like it or not when he tastes it) he'll bring it upon himself to order you one before you even say you want some.
ꕥ Soft snores when he sleeps, it's cute but you know damn well he's tired. Also I think he's very cuddly, like he just likes reminding himself that he's not alone and that his bed is warm because you're in it. Therefore at minimum always has an arm around you in bed.
ꕥ Dances in the rain with you and loves it when you pull him gently on his arm while your hands are intertwined. Takes note of how the the raindrops sometimes fall on your lashes while you look up at him smiling.
ꕥ Kyle Garrick who wants nothing more in the world to see you happy and smiling. His "this is the woman I'm going to marry" moment was when you baked his favorite cake for his birthday despite it being so hard, you nailed it perfectly. (Whether it's out of luck or skill is up to you)
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Alejandro Vargas
ꕥ (idk how to write for this angry Mexican man but I'll try my best, love him and his megamind hairline though <3)
ꕥ Alejandro is definitely a flirt, a very bold on at that. He's quite forward when it comes to liking someone so yeah.
ꕥ He lives for it when you boss him around. That being said, he isn't picky about body type or any of the sort.
ꕥ Will teach you Spanish if you don't know any, definitely prioritizes the curse words and laughs whenever you jokingly call him pendejo.
ꕥ Wouldn't mind you teaching him your own culture and mother tongue. Bonus points if it's similar to his.
ꕥ Has Spanish nicknames for you because I imagine his own culture is important to him.
ꕥ Would hate it if you had the same line of work but will never take it out on you, it's just that it's so dangerous given the people he's involved with. (It's definitely Valeria)
ꕥ Speaking of El Sinombre, I don't think they had anything romantic going on. It's mainly platonic and the "betrayal" sucked on Alejandro's side. They definitely had some rivalry and the tension was through the roof. (Mainly because I headcanon Valeria as Lesbian)
ꕥ Can be so romantic when he tries, you can't tell me this mf ain't a smooth talker because he definitely is. Can be very blunt like in a forward way with his affection too.
ꕥ Likes kissing your wrist and feeling your pulse against his lips because it reminds him you're alive. (The amount of angst this scenario carries would be something I'm up for to write)
ꕥ Is sent on a fit of rage when something happens to you, say you got kidnapped then this man would tears off the walls of every building if he had to.
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Rodolfo "Rudy" Parra
ꕥ (ANOTHER UNDERATED CHARACTER)
ꕥ Another Golden Retriever boyfriend. This man is just loving and dotting, very husband material.
ꕥ Loves chubby women, has a soft spot for them and just likes holding them.
ꕥ He's definitely used to the insecurity that comes with the body, also doesn't get why such beauty standards are even in place. Has and would fuck the insecure out of you again if he had to. (It's in a very gentle and loving manner)
ꕥ If you hold him in your arms, he'd be absolutely living for it. He already has had a long day and being honest he hasn't had many lovers that went far so having you care in this way about him would have him wrapped around your finger.
ꕥ Worships the ground you walk on. That's it.
ꕥ Would take everything to heart whenever you teach him or mention something within your culture if you aren't of Spanish origins like he is. He just loves you so much that it makes him happy knowing more about you.
ꕥ Would adore slow dancing with you, brings him back to reality where he realizes that he has you and that you're there.
ꕥ Terrified that one day you'll end up leaving him so reassurance would be much appreciated by him.
ꕥ Definitely a sucker for receiving forehead kisses, as for giving he likes to kiss the back of your hand.
ꕥ If ever danger presents itself to you too closely, he would have a heart attack like full on crying but not in public though.
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