#i'd write a whole fic 🤩
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reader whose ex is shinsou n had a long-term serious relationship with him, but is now dating bakugo. but then bakugo constantly makes a big deal out of him saying that you're not totally over shinsou yet and you're just dating him to move on. and then it turns into a big fight, taking turns w hurtful jabs at each other until you reach your limit and just burst out, "shinsou had a whole brainwashing quirk for god's sake and yet i felt much safer when i was with him than when i am with you"
#ex!shinsou and ex!bakugo are so interesting for me 🤩#if angst was my forte#and if my angst fics didn't flop 💀 (ppl make it v clear that angst isn't what they came to my blog for 😔)#i'd write a whole fic 🤩#this is by far my weirdest shinsou brainrot#( 💬 ) chats#reader didn't mean that btw they're just feeling a little silly 🤣🤣
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I'm so in love with your stories, especially the Grumpy Sunshine Series got me🤩 so I got a request for it, hope like it.
Could you write a sick Sunshine fic, with Bucky being his grumpy self :D after a mission went not as good as planed, leaving Sunshine being thrown into a nearly frozen lake, they are now back at home. Bucky is pissed making Sunshine responsible for the difficulties they had at the mission, when in fact he's only pissed that got thrown into thr cold lake being hurt. Sunshine is slowly feeling ill, getting worse with the hours. Deathly pale with a raging fever she stumbles out of her bedroom searching for help in her semi conscious state...
She ends up having a severe pneumonia and Bucky and the guys worriedly taking care of her. Bucky regretting is cruel behavior towards to and not noticing you feeling this sick.
I really hope you like it, you wonderful writer
If I had a nickel for every time that Sunshine gets hypothermia in this series, I'd have two nickels, which isn't a lot, but it is strange that it happened twice. 😂
Listen, I love this. I love this so much. I'm very sorry that this took so long, but I wanted to get it right. I hope you love it and thank you so, so much for the request! 💛
(seriously guys, never stop sending me requests, they're so much fun)
Pairing: Grumpy!Bucky Barnes x Sunshine!Reader
Part of The Grumpy x Sunshine Series
Bleeding Time
Hours.
Minutes.
Seconds.
Bucky knew how important every one of them was.
Time was a commodity, the most valuable of resources. A luxury not offered to many.
It was so fleeting.
He knew that. He knew it well.
Bleeding time was the most fatal of injuries. Hemorrhaging seconds was lethal. Allowing minutes to slip through your fingers like the sands of time was deadly.
So there he stands, raking through his mind, trying to figure out how long he'd left you to bleed?
As he stands in a hospital room, listening to the doctor talk and overwhelm him with questions, he can't help but wonder how he squandered so much of that precious time.
"Mr. Barnes?"
"Yes," Bucky immediately responds, his eyes snapping back to the doctor. "Yes, I was with her the whole day. I can tell you what happened."
"The more we know, the better we can determine what course of action to take."
"Of course," Bucky agrees, a hollow look on his face as he stands at the foot of your hospital bed. "I remember every minute of it."
He remembers every hour, every minute, every second of it.
And he remembers wasting every single one of them.
--
The first minute was probably the most terrifying minute of his life. He'd faced life and death before, but this wasn't his life hanging in the balance.
It was yours.
"I regret everything!" you shout, holding onto the landing bar of the helicopter for dear life. "I regret it all!"
"Tell me you are not on that helicopter!" Bucky demands, hearing the commotion from your unmuted comms.
"Joke's on you, I'm not on the helicopter!" you triumphantly exclaim, dangling from the landing bar hundreds of feet in the air.
Before Bucky can breathe a sigh of relief that you weren't aboard an enemy helicopter, you finish your sentence, "I'm hanging from the helicopter."
"What?" Bucky bellows. "That was not part of the plan! What were you thinking?"
"I was thinking, hey, the files that we needed are on the helicopter. I'm watching it take off," you audibly walk him through your impulsive thought process. "Hey, I should go after it. And now, I'm winging everything else."
From there, all Bucky can hear is a chaotic cacophony of sounds. He assumes it's a general struggle as you try to pull yourself aboard a helicopter full of HYDRA agents who probably wouldn't be the most welcoming to you.
"Sam? Do you have visual?" Bucky curtly asks.
"Every time I try I keep getting coming under heavy fire. Can't get up there long enough to see what's happening," Sam explains, doing his best to weave through the thick forest surrounding the HYDRA base. Every time he soared high, bullets were immediately trying to shoot him down.
"I need someone to take out those guns," Bucky orders whatever available SHIELD agent is closest. "We need to see what's happening!"
"On it, Sergeant," an agent whose name keeps evading Bucky's mind responds.
"She's on the helicopter, Buck!" Sam calls, only able to pop up from the tree line for a short moment before he has to duck back down for cover.
Bucky hears your muffled voice come through the comms again, "If I'm going down, I'm taking you with me!"
"I'm trying to get down to the shoreline as quickly as I can," Bucky states, sprinting as quickly as he can from the base.
It was five miles, but even as a super soldier, that meant it would take at least another five minutes before anyone could even try to help you.
"Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry!" you prattle to the HYDRA agent. "Did not mean to do -"
"Doll?" Bucky shouts when your voice cuts out.
Sam, without much regard for his own safety, pops up from the tree line again, "Oh my God..."
"What?" Bucky frantically demands.
"They're both hanging now. She's holding on and he's got her leg," Sam quickly rattles off. Before whispering in horror, "He's gonna take her down with him."
"Let go," you yell, your words punctuated by desperate thrashing of your legs as you once again dangle from the helicopter. "I don't have the upper body strength for this!"
"Just hang on!" Sam shouts, dodging the bullets that rain down on him. "I'm on my way!"
"I'm trying!" you cry.
Sam immediately sees that you're fighting a losing battle. Your grip is slipping from the landing bar, your fingertips straining to hold both yourself and a tenacious HYDRA agent up.
Bucky didn't really know what it was from: Sam getting clipped in the arm from another flurry of bullets or the fact that Sam had a front row seat to his best friend fall hundreds of feet into a icy lake, but Bucky had never heard such a bloodcurdling scream come from Sam until the moment your grip failed you and you fell.
Minute 1
"What just happened?!" Bucky desperately screams. "Sam, what just happened?!"
"She fell, they both fell into the lake," Sam panics, still soaring through the sky to get to you as quickly as he can.
"Do you see her? Sam, tell me you see her!" Bucky demands.
"No! No! I can't see anything. The water isn't clear enough, there's ice everywhere!" Sam scans over the lake, looking through the general area of where you fell as quickly as you can.
The dark blue, murky waters are unforgiving.
Thin sheets of ice float along the restless waves.
There's no sign of you anywhere.
"Sam!" Bucky screams.
Minute 2
That second minute started much like the first one. His heart raced as ice flowed through his veins. He pushed himself to run even faster, faster than he'd ever ran in his life and it still wasn't enough.
"Sam!"
"I'm trying! I can't see anything!"
Bucky feels like he can't breathe, his heart aches, yet races faster than he's ever felt it.
He couldn't imagine this being the end for you. He wouldn't accept that. He'd search every inch of that lake until you were found if he had to.
This couldn't be it.
He can almost see the shoreline through the forest. He's almost there.
But it's been over a minute. You've gone more than an entire minute without oxygen. That's the average a person could last underwater, he knows.
He pushes himself even harder, his muscles on fire as he forces himself to run faster and faster.
Just as you hit that two minute mark, Sam shouts, "She broke through. I see her!"
Minute 4
There was so much commotion happening over the next two minutes that it all just felt like static in Bucky's ear.
"I've got her," Sam exhaustedly pants, "She's alright. I got her."
Bucky clutches his chest, practically doubling over in relief. He stands on the shoreline, watching as Sam fishes you from an icy lake.
"She's okay," Sam repeats, wincing as you violently cough and sputter out lake water. "I got her."
It didn't take much more than the visual of Sam pulling you out of a frozen lake for Bucky to call this mission an epic failure.
The flash drive containing the names of HYDRA operatives was gone with the man who'd fallen into the lake with you.
The computers were all destroyed.
The base was in ruins with any and all records completely destroyed.
The love of his life had almost died for nothing, a life nearly thrown away in complete vain.
It was a disaster.
It was his disaster.
As mission leader, this was Bucky's mess.
The warm relief that overtook him, steeled itself, burning to a degree far beyond comfort, boiling over into white hot rage.
Minute 14
It took an almost ten minute trek in the icy Siberian forest to get back to the Quinjet.
In that time, Bucky's rage took over.
With each passing minute, he ruminated, allowing his anger to stew just above a raging boil. You always were so careless with your life. So willing to push past your limits, so willing to put yourself in danger.
But this, this was too much. This time you'd gone too far.
How long before your antics became more than even you could handle?
And what was he supposed to do when that day came? How could he ever come to accept a world without you because of you? What would he ever do if he had to live in a world where there was no you? You weren't tempting fate in Bucky's mind, you were taunting it, begging fate to take you away from him.
Bucky doesn't stop to remind himself that you're okay or that he was working himself into a blind rage over hypotheticals and worse case scenarios.
He barked orders at anyone that had the displeasure of getting in his way.
You kept quiet, still soaking wet in your mission gear. You and Sam walked side by side, uncharacteristically quiet as you fled the enemy territory without a single victory.
A part of you felt awful, you knew you were part of the reason things became so chaotic with the way you strayed so far from the plan.
"I cannot fucking believe this!" Bucky fumes in the Quinjet, pacing back and forth as your team, batter, bruised, and some pretty seriously injured, slink up the ramp. "What the hell happened out there?"
Everyone remains quiet, tensed and ready for the ugly lecture you were all going to get for today's disaster.
It was always difficult when a mission went awry, but with Bucky acting as mission leader today, you knew he was going to be even more upset.
You knew this assignment meant a lot to him. This one was high risk, but also high reward.
The names of old HYDRA operatives that were allegedly living amongst the general population.
It meant a lot to him, still, you really didn't expect him to take it out on everyone aboard.
Especially not when everyone was still tending to their wounds, not while everyone was still rattled, battered and bruised.
Apparently, that didn't matter.
Apparently, it didn't change that Bucky was on a warpath.
Minute 16
"Here, let me wrap this for you. It looks pretty bad," you offer to Sam, sitting down on the seat next to him to fix the nasty bullet graze down his arm.
"Maybe you should change first," Sam suggests, shying away from the frosty feeling of your fingertips on his skin, "It was a long walk back, you've got to be freezing."
You were, but as you look around the jet to your other team mates, you decide that you're the least injured of everyone.
At least, the least visibly injured.
After all, what were some wet clothes when your best friend was clipped by a bullet, when your team mates were nursing broken bones, knife wounds, and other awful injuries.
"I didn't bring a change of clothes, I wasn't exactly planning on going for a swim today," you dryly remark, opening the first aid kit.
"You really should go change out of those wet clothes," Sam insists.
"I'm fine, Sam. You're the one dripping blood everywhere," you remind him, a hint of a chuckle threaded in your words, ignoring the involuntary shivers now wracking up and down your arms.
"Don't even get me started on you two," Bucky suddenly lectures you and Sam, startling both of you. You mostly ignore Bucky as you wry to clean Sam's wound. You tried not to take his anger personally, he had every right to be upset. You just never thought he would be so casually cruel about it, "You were both irresponsible, reckless, impulsive. I don't have enough adjectives to describe the shit you two pulled today- "
"Will you ease up?" you shoot back, fed up with the name calling. "We did our best!"
"Your best?" Bucky dismissively scoffs. He angrily fumes, "That was your best? Getting dumped into a freezing lake and needing Sam to rescue you is your best?"
There was often this misconception about you and Bucky. It wasn't entirely unfounded and not entirely untrue.
The misconception was that you didn't fight.
It was somewhat true.
In your personal lives, you two rarely fought. You were both very well suited to each other. You both balanced each other out.
But working with your significant other was hard.
And working with your significant other when you were both working high risk missions and assignments that constantly put your lives on the line, paired with completely different personalities was even harder.
There was an agreement between the two of you that your work and personal lives had to remain separate.
Your work and personal lives were neatly compartmentalized and mostly left at the door.
But, that also meant, that on an occasion or two, you and Bucky would get into a fight or two at work.
Sometimes, you felt like Bucky was too harsh, too abrasive, too unwilling to compromise or make amendments to his stringent plans.
Sometimes, Bucky thought that you were too impulsive, too willing to march to the beat of your own drum.
Unlike some of your team mates, you weren't scared of Bucky. You weren't afraid to stand up to him when you felt like his temper was getting the best of him. Sometimes, it worked and it would snap Bucky out of his mood.
Today, it made things much worse.
"Oh, no," Sam worriedly sighs.
You abruptly stand up, bitterly chuckling in disbelief, "Are you implying that what happened was my fault?"
"Maybe we should all just -" Sam tries to interject, holding the gauze to his arm.
"Stay out of it!" you both shout at Sam.
With wide eyes, Sam slumps down in his seat, "Alrighty, then."
"I wasn't implying it," Bucky snarks back.
You scoff, "Please tell me you're joking!"
"If the shoe fits," Bucky retorts. "Funny, how you're the only one that didn't stick to the plan."
"Don't say it, don't say it,' Sam whispers to himself.
"Maybe if you hadn't rushed into today, we would have known what was waiting for us!" you accuse.
"And you said it," Sam quietly groans, pinching the bridge of his nose as he further shrinks down in his seat.
"I'm done with this conversation," Bucky seethes. "You can take it up with Tony and Fury."
"Fine!"
"Fine," Bucky grimaces, storming away from you.
Minute 18
"You're shaking," Sam worriedly comments as you finish bandaging up the gash on his arm.
"With rage."
Sam rolls his eyes as you glare at the back of Bucky's head, "I'm serious. That lake was practically frozen. It's been almost twenty minutes, you're gonna get sick."
"I'm fine, Sam."
"If you're not going to go change, can you at least go sit with Bucky? He's like a human furnace."
You cross your arms over your chest, "I'm not sitting with him after he blamed me for today."
"You're being stubborn," Sam points out. "Please don't make me call him back here."
"Just let me finish this bandage and I'll go find something to change into."
It takes less than a minute for you to finish tying the bandage around Sam's bullet wound.
Minute 20
"You don't look so good," Sam warns when you amble back over to the seat beside him, "I thought you went to go find clothes!"
"I did. I only found this - this thermal blanket," you explain through chattering teeth.
"Those only work if you're still producing body heat!" Sam frantically states. He snatches your hand taking note of the blueish hue forming on the very tips of your fingers and the purplish hue of your lips. "Bucky!"
"Wha-" Bucky's word falters as he watches you huddled up under the thermal blanket. "Jesus, why haven't you changed yet?"
Your breath catches in your throat as you try to speak. The words he's saying go over your head.
You blink up at him, confused.
You keen at the feeling of Bucky's searing hand on your pulse point. You shake your head, trying to focus on why he looks so distressed. You don't like the look on his face. Your eyebrows pull together, upset that you can't pinpoint why he's so upset.
"Why didn't you say anything?"
Suddenly, it feels like you're back in that lake. With water encasing your ears, you can hardly hear Bucky's frantic pleas to you. As you sink further and further, the light slowly fades away.
His warm hands grip your chin, once again, you sink into his touch, smiling up at him. Your eyelids flutter shut at the comforting feeling surrounding you. He gently shakes your head, tapping at your cheek, "Hey, hey, your heart rate is slowing down, whatever you do, I need you to keep your eyes open, okay?"
Each time you reach out for the surface, it slips just out of your grasp. Bucky's voice pleads with you, but you just keep sinking. Further and further until it's nothing more than a distant echo.
The darkness wraps around you life a warm blanket, it feels so good, so right.
It doesn't matter how much you fight it, it was always a losing battle.
There's no escape as it all goes dark.
Hour 94
The whole time, he refuses to leave your side. His comfort, his well being, it all takes a backseat.
Not because he feels himself drowning in guilt, though that was very much the case, but because fear had not loosened its grip on his heart.
He uses this time sitting beside your motionless body as an opportunity to torment himself. He thinks about all the mistakes he made, all the things he said.
All he can think is that if this was really it, if you didn't make it, his last real words to you would be him shouting at you, blaming you for what happened.
You must've been scared out of your mind. Falling out of a helicopter like that, you must've been terrified. Getting trapped underneath the ice for two minutes. On the trek back to the jet.
And he didn't once ask you if you were okay.
He didn't make sure that you'd changed out of your soaked clothing. He didn't check to make sure you were properly warming up. What kind of partner was that, he asks himself. What kind of boyfriend would let his concern turn into rage and frustration aimed at the person he almost lost?
And now, now, he really was losing you.
You lie there, he holds your hand. It's been that way for almost four days. It felt like his entire world, his entire heart had been torn to shreds.
Your temperature was finally back to normal. When they first brought you in, it was too low. Then, once they'd brought it up, a respiratory infection sent your temperature soaring.
Now, it was back to normal. Bucky could hold your hand and feel your normal warmth. The nurses mostly left him alone, usually tip toeing around him as they checked your vitals over and over again.
The nurses keep looking at him with a growing pity in their eyes. It's been four days, you've yet to wake up.
Bucky knows what they're thinking. He knows that they see him as the delusional boyfriend convinced that you'll make a miraculous recovery.
He reconciles that there was some truth to that. He did think there was going to be a miraculous recovery.
Those nurses didn't know you. He did. He knew you were a fighter. He internally curses himself for that cliche. He can't bring himself to care. If cliches were all he had, then he would take it.
So he tends to you, all in anticipation for the moment that you wake. Because you will, you will wake up. You'll wake up and he'll beg for forgiveness. He'll beg forever if that's what you want, he just needs you to wake up.
So he does it all, everything he can and more.
Reads you that book that you've been trying to finish for weeks now.
Fresh flowers by your bedside.
Plays your favorite songs over and over again.
He even made Sam go get your lucky shirt from the Compound. He's never believed that an inanimate object could be lucky, but you did, so he will for you too.
His head rests in your lap, slowly dozing off with your book in his hand, still unfinished.
After days without sleep, he drifts off quickly to a dreamland where you are awake, where you're still holding him, laughing with him. It's a nice reprieve after four days of hell.
Hour 95
You eyelids flutter, still heavy from exhaustion. Your eyes still closed, you take a breath though your aching lungs beg you not to. You creak open a bleary eye at the incessant beeping from beside you.
The fluorescent lights above you startle you, forcing both eyes open. You immediately look down to Bucky, fast asleep with his light snores filling the room. You smile down at him, resting your head back down on your pillow to avoid waking him.
Sore muscles and exhaustion still bog you down, but you can't resist gently carding your fingers through Bucky's unruly hair. You quietly chuckle as he keens at the affection, sleepily groaning with a tired smile, "Hmm..."
His eyes whirl open at the sound of your laugh. His head snaps up off your lap and he just stares at you for a moment, not entirely convinced that he isn't still dreaming.
You sleepily sigh, head still back against your pillow, "Are you still mad?"
"Oh my God," he whispers. He surprises you by immediately standing up, sending the backwards. He bends down, carefully avoiding your IV, he kisses your temple, murmuring against your skin, "You're awake. Thank God, you're awake. I'm sorry, so, so, sorry."
You raise your hand, running it over Bucky's stubbly jaw, "Hi."
A laugh of relief bubbles out of his mouth, relishing in the feeling of your warm hand caressing his face, "Hi."
"How long was I out?" you wonder, surprised at Bucky's reaction.
"Four days."
"Four days?" you squawk.
"You hit the water pretty hard according to the doctor," Bucky begins to explain. "There was some bruising on your ribs and lungs. By the time we got you here, you were severely hypothermic and for the last few days they've been treating you for a respiratory infection."
You humorously snort, "Well, now no one can ever say that I never took one for the team."
"That's not funny," Bucky deadpans, a frown pulling at the corner of his mouth. "You could've died out there. I - You - You almost died out there."
You take his hand, pressing the palm of his hand to your lips, "It's alright. I'm okay."
"No, it's not alright." He fervently shakes his head, anger once again seeps into his words. This time, he's careful to direct that anger at the person that deserves it: himself. He was to blame for this whole mess. "You got hurt, which is bad enough. Even worse, it was all for nothing. You got hurt for nothing."
"It wasn't for nothing," you interject.
Bucky's eyebrows furrow, "What?"
"Do you have the sweater I was wearing?"
"It's right here," Bucky grabs the sweater, all your mission gear in a bag set beside him. "Are you cold? I can get you another blanket, or I can call the nurse - I should call the nurse actually."
You grab his hand, halting him. "I'm fine. Promise."
He hands you your jacket with a puzzled expression, "Then, why-"
You stick your hand in your pocket, fumbling around for a moment, "Here it is."
"What?"
You take your hand out of your pocket, revealing the flash drive to Bucky, "It wasn't for nothing, James."
You truly never ceased to surprise him, Bucky softly gasps, "How did you get that?"
"The HYDRA agent, he dropped it when we hit the water," you sheepishly shrug. "I saw it sinking so I swam down to get it."
Bucky can hardly fathom it.
From what the doctor said, the way you hit the water was enough to do incredible amounts of physical damage. From the amount of time you were down there, they deduced that you'd gotten stuck under a sheet of ice or the hit had rendered you momentarily unconscious.
Then, there was the icy lake, he knew every second of swimming in that water must've felt like daggers against your skin.
Risking getting caught underneath thick ice, you swam down to save the mission. He can't believe that you actually swam down, “You swam down?”
“I knew how much it meant to you. I saw it and I went for it.”
You extend the thumb drive out to him, “I didn't say anything because I didn’t want to get your hopes up if it didn’t work anymore, but it wasn't for nothing. It was for you.”
He pushes your extended hand away. Instead, pulling you into his crushing embrace, “You mean more to me. So much more.”
Grumpy Sunshine Series
AnonymityIsFun Masterlist
Reblogs and comments are always appreciated 💛
Taglist: @marianita195 @meli18gonzalez@ludicbouquetfromearth@matchat3a@famousbreadcherryblossomsstuff@valoraxx@blue786sworld@buckyandgeraltsupremacy@geminigengar@ansaturn@ecolle@lexhalstead3@ybflkmj@mediocre-daydreams@shanye1112@thegirlnextdoorssister@toomanyfanficsbruh@moonlightreader649@breathtaking-cynthia@mirikusashes@beans-and-toast@niyahcoca@katiechikin@elxvrr@antiheroxsblog@infamouslyclumsy@krissydclayton93@buckysbarne@deadheadwbedhead @qualitygiantshoepsychic@whitexwolfxx310@buckysbarne
#anonymityisfunwriter#anonymityisfun#grumpy sunshine#grumpy x sunshine#grumpy sunshine trope#james buchanan barnes#james bucky barnes#bucky barnes#bucky barnes x reader#bucky x female reader#bucky x reader#bucky barnes x you#bucky x y/n#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky barnes one shot#bucky angst#bucky fanfic#bucky barnes fanfiction#marvel fanfiction#reader insert#x reader#fanfic#sam wilson#bucky#bucky fic#bucky fluff#a request#request
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20 Questions Game
Thanks for tagging me, @bronzeagepizzeria & @quite-right-too 🤩
How many works do you have on AO3?
28
2. What's your total AO3 words count?
892,591
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Doctor Who
4. What are your top five fics by kudos?
Bloodstream (Ten x Rose multi-chap)
Tiny Lights Below (Ten x Rose - Tentoo x Rose OT3)
For All We're Worth (Ten x Rose multi-chap)
Mending (Ten x Rose multi-chap)
The Doctor's Brilliant Idea (Ten x Rose multi-chap)
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
Always always always, but I have a horrible habit of getting behind on replying to them - usually because I'm busy when I get a comment and consistently forget to come back... Then suddenly there's a ton of them. This is a reminder to sit down and tackle my neglected comments, so thanks, thing.
6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
Ordinary Gifts for sure.
7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
I meannnn, all of my fics have at least mostly happy endings, as I'm a baby. But I'd probably say Bloodstream - just considering the odds that have to be overcome to get there.
8. Do you get hate on fics?
Never had until my goddamn Martha fic. But thankfully, the hate was on the latter pairing, not my writing. That's the only solace I took from that (along with some badass readers who defended me to a handful of lunatics).
9. Do you write smut? If so what kind?
I write all of the smut! Lengthy, graphic, emotional 'first time' scenes, as well as all subsequent smut. I have a very, very difficult time skipping over sex (have only done it once to date, and intend to write a separate fic to cover the smut I skipped 💀) and will never skip the first time.
10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?
No, never have.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Nope, thank god.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
Somebody translated Bloodstream into Russian, which was fucking cool.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
I'm doing it right now with @bronzeagepizzeria and my excitement knows no bounds.
14. What's your all-time favourite ship?
TenRose/TentooRose, of course.
15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?
Had an idea for a fic inspired by To Have and Not Hold by mtemplar, but have never opened the lil WIP again, and that was over a year ago.
16. What are your writing strengths?
Smut?
Also, not sure if this counts - but I'm a perfectionist about my writing. I'm constantly, obsessively rereading, which I do both as I go and when everything is finished. Making alterations, amending this or that, punching up, rewriting/removing whole scenes etc... But I still, of course, make some mistakes here and there.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
I write way too goddamn much. Way too much positive reinforcement in the comments of my first fic gave me a weird perma-complex where I don't even feel like a chapter is complete until it's around 10k, which is insane. Somebody save me. This is a serious problem.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?
I personally don't do it - I'd rather allude to it. For example, from my fic Exposure, since I guess I'm just going all in with this goddamn questionnaire:
He murmurs something soft, something gorgeous, but Rose has got no idea what it is— only that it's far too structured to be sleepy gibberish. There's an almost-Italian-but-also-sort-of-Arabic resonance to it, yet entirely unique; something she can't even pretend to know how to accurately describe.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
The first actual fic I ever wrote was for the Russian girl group t.A.T.u in either 2003 or 2004, but I wrote it at school during 'reading time' in Language Arts. It never saw the light of day anywhere.
The first proper fic I actually wrote, finished, and posted completely was for my first feral fixation ship, Inu/Kag (Inuyasha) back in 2005.
20. Favourite fic you've ever written?
I fucking hate this question, but probably For All We're Worth or The Purpose of Repose
Tagging: @demdifferentstories @badxwolfxrising @mulderscully @aintfraidanoghosts @deardiary17 @naaer No pressure!
#Ignore my stupid formatting#I went to my laptop to copy/paste the whole post and its all kinds of jacked up#20 questions#Ao3#fanfiction#fic#dw fic#tenrose#tentoorose
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please excuse my word vomit but I shortened the hell out of my caption to avoid being annoying and your tags on my art sent me into a frenzy haha
so my favorite pre relationship dynamic for convin (and in my current fic) they start out as enemies with benefits who accidentally develop feelings but are in denial and know the smart thing to do is to stop and so every time they hook up is the last time (until the next time). and you’re right I drew gavin with the pained expression bc he’s the first one to realize his feelings are feelings but he doesn’t think he deserves connor and he thinks connor wants this to stay physical and that hurts but 1. he thinks he deserves the hurt and 2. he’ll take what he can get for as long as he can get it (hahaha ow). I’m allergic to happy endings in my own writing but I wholly support your happily ever after 😄
also no pressure at all just floating the idea but I’d be so down if you ever wanted to do a collab :] anyways yeah I’m happy you liked my pic and your comments always bring me joy, keep on being wonderful
Omggggggg, what a great ask to get!!! Thank you so much for sending this! 🤩🤩🤩
So, one, your idea behind your art is wonderful and fits them both perfectly. Two idiots getting in over their heads and catching feelings? Yep, that's them, lol. Although, I'm already imagining a happy ending for the two of them, even in that scenario, so whoops! XD
I know for me, when I saw your art I was thinking that they were set to be separated. Specific scenarios were still up in the air (i.e. investigation gone awry, some sort of terminal condition, human!AU college fling, historical!AU, etc), but there would be some sort of circumstance that would drive the two of them apart. And this would be the scene of them making the most of their last days together, with Connor throwing his whole self into it while Gavin, in an effort to make the inevitable separation hurt less, begins to withdraw, even though it hurts him. And it would lead to a really messy breakup where they both say hurtful things and are just left with so many regrets.
But then... there would be some sort of timeskip and they would meet again, both very changed now but never forgetting the impact the other had on their life. And again, something would force them together, whether it's work or some sort of mystery or even just running into each other over and over again. And they would both realize that the other hasn't really changed as much as they initially thought. That he's still the man they fell in love with. And that those feelings are far from dead. And eventually, things would rekindle in a burst of passion and long-held feelings and it would be terrible and beautiful and cathartic and so, so painful all at once. They'd wake to a morning of regrets and, in their fear, again try to sever ties. But they'd be miserable about it and all the life would drain from their days. That burst of brightness they'd slowly brought back to each other has once again vanished and they're both left in the dark. And then, idk, the plot would pull them together one final time and they'd get to have their moments of peril and heroics and emotional confessions. And finally, finally they'd confess their feelings for each other. The feelings they've had for so, so long. And they'd both realize what absolute dipshits they've both been, that they've both felt the same way for years and were just too emotionally constipated to do anything about it.
And then I'd probably undercut it with some sort of big BLAMO moment where one of them gets taken out by the bad guy (I've decided that there's a bad guy now XD) and they'd be dying in the other's arms. And you'd think that that's it! That, after so much build up and them finally getting on the same page with each other, that they won't get their happily ever after after all.
But then idk, there'd be some clever deus ex machina I seeded into the story early on that comes through for them and they both live and the bad guy goes to jail and everything is GOOD!
And then sappy epilogue. XD
...Ugh, see? Look what you're making me consider here with your beautiful art?! I'm plotting. Multi-chapter plotting! UGH! 😫😫😫
No, but seriously, I adore that art and felt so damn inspired when I saw it? I wish I'd had more energy to do something with that, but alas! I was just getting off work and it was very late. 😓😓😓
BUT THEN YOU SENT THIS AND MENTIONED A COLLAB AND NOW IT'S ALSO VERY LATE HERE BUT I'M JUST 👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀 BECAUSE DAMN SON, I WOULD LOVE TO COLLAB?! Like, I legit cannot make any promises, I've had the worst case of writer's block ever now for a couple years and counting. But even if it's just, idk, discussing ideas or chatting about these idiots or something, I'd so be down for it! Definitely feel free to hmu whenever!!! I'd love to chat!!! :D
#asks#dang what an honor!#you made my freaking day dude!#been giddy about this since I saw it at work earlier! :D#bless
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for fanfic emoji ask:
😅, 🥺, 🤡, 😈, 🛒, ❌, 💞, 🧠, 🤩?
😅 whats a story or a scene you're a smidge embarrassed exists?
iugh.... good question..... OH!!! my first big wip, a wolf's magic- the LI, mountain, and MC, sky (this was BEFORE i started calling myself sky 🔫) had a simba and nala tumble down a hill which is both cute and makes me wanna explode. like... that whole chapter, kind of. ^^
🥺 is there a certain type of moment or common interaction between your characters that never fail to put you in your feels?
when the layers are pulled away and youre left being vulnerable with someone youre close to- a rival, a friend, a lover, a sibling, anyone you could be arguably close to. that and whenever i write my characters being playful/catty with each other!
🤡 funny scene:
I FORGOT TO ANSWER THIS ONE!!! MAH BAD!!!!!
sfdm is such. a god damn blast to read and write. specifically there's one back and forth where Mikey is holding the kids and Donnie immediately assumes he somehow procreated. cracked me tf up
i have a future scene in tsos where grimmkid sets someone on fire and everyone freaks out (karen complaining and 'omg im so sorry about my kid' to 'flare set them on fire again')
😈 has there ever been a moment in one of your stories where you've been playfully mean?
heh. yeah. sfdm, tsos, and warmblood have moments like this? in defense of warmblood, though, its alllllll gonna lead somewhere eventually :]
🛒 what are some common themes you incorporate into your fics?
I lost a lot of my family members in really quick succession so a lot of my works now are often tinged with grief and regret, I've noticed. In all of them, there's some interpersonal conflict between characters that I always plan on resolving at some point. I like character studies!
❌ whats a trope you will never write?
Misunderstandings, the kind that last an entire fic :| simply Speak to the Person you Imbecile.
💞 who's your comfort character?
great question! wish i knew! honestly ik what a blorbo is but im nooot 100% sure on a comfort character - do you just think about them when youre sad?? or do you squish and squeeze them like a blorbo?
🧠 give me a character and I'll give you a headcanon.
where's the character silly?
Hm. HMMMM. From the HK fandom: ghost (the character you play as) has a secret name they refer to themselves as, but they also roll with ghost because honestly? so many ppl already call them that. sure. why not
🤩 what's your favorite character to write?
Grimmchild (to be renamed), because they think like I do (jumping from topic to topic and going on tangents), Raph from ROTTMNT (eldest child 🤜🤛 with not bad but not great parents), annnnnnd I think I'd really like to write Shae since she's like. a butch nerd. (im butch leaning nerd)
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Hi :D For the ask game: 🤩, 🙌, 🟥, 💻, 🦗, 😱, 🎵
Hiiii Wild thank you for the ask < 3
I already answered the first two questions here!
🟥How long do you spend in edits?
Way longer than I want to but probably less than I should lol. I read the whole chapter/fic through once out loud to myself and depending on the length it usually takes me an hour or two. I can rarely be assed to do more than that lol
💻What do you write your stories on? Laptop, phone, paper, etc.
I write my stories themselves solely on my laptop (excluding a few quotes I might have hurriedly typed on my phone after getting a brilliant idea while walking my dog) and for the most part I outline on my computer as well, though recently I hit a bit of a wall with an outline on my computer and had to move the whole thing to paper lol. I also keep all of my ideas in a little notebook where I sometimes write dialogue bits in so I can add them to fics later.
🦗Do you write in sequence or jump around?
Usually, I write in sequence, but if I get really stuck I sometimes jump around a bit. I find my writing makes more sense when I write in sequence tho, if I jump around too much I end up having to edit more in the end and I don't love that lol
😱What's your greatest fear as a fanfic writer?
Losing interest in the characters I'm writing about is a big one, especially because I have a lot of longer stories I want to tell and they obviously take time to write. Other than that (and perhaps more unlikely to happen) I'd hate it if someone bound and sold my fics. I don't even know what I'd do if that happened but the whole selling fics thing makes me so angry and the fact that it can happen to literally anyone if you write something that ends up big enough is terrifying.
🎵Do you make playlists for your fics?
Sometimes! I have some general character playlists, but I do also make actual playlists for fics sometimes, especially if they're longer. A Very Merry Christmas Cliché has a playlist where the songs on there match with the names of the songs I chose for the chapters!
Ask game :)
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Hello there! I just want to say how much I have been enjoying Beast in the Beauty series! 😍 I think I have yet to seen someone write a tbz x jack the ripper au (or maybe I have yet to find properly 😅) so this made me all excited and I absolutely can't wait for the next chapter!! 🤩
Also I was wondering, do you have any of your favorite tbz authors to recommend? I'd love to explore some new works & series 🥰
Have a lovely day! 🖤
hiya!! :DD OMG PLS THIS MAKES ME SO HAPPY LIKE??? 😭😭😭 i just started my hyunjae series not too long ago so i wasn't expecting people to actually find and read them hahahaksdjd but i really appreciate your kind words i really do! that motivates me to release the upcoming chapters as quick as i possibly can 😤🥰
oh man. i have wayyyy to many favourite tbz authors but here are the ones that comes up to mind for now! (they are also the reason that i took the chance to began writing actually!! 🩵🩵🩵)
@sungbeam bruh she is amazing. period. she has given me the encouragement and so fun to talk to tbh 😩 i personally highly recommend her love in unity series & simple gifts ❤️
@biaswreckingfics she was the very first tbz author i came across actually when i returned from my tumblr slumber lmao blurred lines was my very first tbz fic i've read and it holds a special place in my heart 💚 oh. i highly recommend checking out her new series business or pleasure because it NEEDS 👏 MORE 👏 RECOGNITION 👏
@daisyvisions i randomly came across return the favor one day when i was in my deep sangyeon fic hunt and sis. this fic HUNTS me till this day 🥹🩷 if you're over 18 and are in need of some hot steamy fics then yes she's the one to go to 👀
@sunlightwoo the very first smau fic i've read!! i absolutely love her under the spotlight series (changmin's one is my fav! 💛) and i can't tell you how many times i've reread them and it always cracks me up 😂 she has a lot of other works that are SO WORTH checking out too!
@viastro daisies was my very first fic from her and WHEN I TELL YOU I BAWLED MY EYES OUT READING THIS I ABSOLUTELY DID. 🤧🤧🤧 all good boys is also another one of my fav from her!! 💙
@sankyeom tattle-tale is SOO CUTEE like omg i was feeling all jolly like a kiddo with an ice-cream while finishing this whole fic in one sitting 😭 her other fics are bomb too so pls check them out!! 💜
@jeongjaebae her fics are sooo cute and fluffy omg 🥹🥹🥹🤍🤍🤍 (and some angst as well haha) you look hideous on me and if the lipstick matches are my personal favs! 🧡
that is all for now but i'm sure there are plenty more of amazing authors out there! i'll most probably create a tbz fic rec post in the future for easier navigation! (and for me too as i go back reread them from time to time HAHA)
thank you so much for the lovely ask anon and i wish you the same!! 🩵🩵🩵
#🖤 anon#beast in the beauty#beast in the beauty series#readers feedback!#fics recs#please send these authors love!!#tbz x reader#the boyz x reader
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NIKKI YOUR TEASER 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹 icb i opened the app to this 🤩 i can't wait to read all that u have in your drafts fr but goodness me jae's one sided love rly hits differently 🫢 sometimes i just wonder if he's the kind to uk approach his feelings for s/o proactively or keep it lowkey and just be the kind to take care of them from the side esp in these situations where he knows it's one sided 🧐
and r u feeling better now? gosh it's so uncomfy to be sick and i absolutely dislike being sick :"( please remember to rest well and take care of urself!! there's a whole new wave of covid cases on the rise where i am recently and im tryna avoid the crowds as much as possible considering ive already had covid 3 times 🤡🤡🤡 covid surely loves me more than life does 😕
omy masters is definitely a goal of mine that i'd love to achieve especially before i have kids! can't imagine having to take care of my children while doing masters fr it's going to be so tiring!! 🫣 but i guess i'll take it step by step and see where life takes me! especially cuz financially, masters is gonna take up a bulk of my pay esp as a fresh grad in the industry, so i shall see how i can plan my route out! hehehehe
oh oh do you have any recos for fics these days? i've exhausted my list of stuff to read and shows to watch lately 🥲 so commuting arnd has been kinda boring hehehe
hope this week will be an enjoyable week for u!!!!
love, 🍑
HEHEHEHE I TOLD U IT WAS GOOD !!! idk i'm so attached to this fic even tho it's nowhere near finished but i'm so proud of that intro alone, i couldn't keep it to myself anymore ;;; it's a good standalone AND a good opener, people can take it as either!
i feel like the characters in this are well-developed too. like jae and johnny are complete opposites--sunshine, flirty child who gets around but is secretly in love with his bestie and then there's the more silent and broody but will always take care of you, dreamboat. idk i love writing one sided loves!!! and with jae, idk why but it always hits diff!!!
definitely not feeling better but i went to work :( i've been blowing my nose all day. pretty sure imma get a rash from all the tissues i've been using. OH GOD 3 TIMES??? thankful i only got it once!
yes take it step by step. a masters program is really time and energy consuming but i still think it is worth it! there's just a lot of things you need to consider.
uuuh fic recs??? all the ones in @sehunniepotrecs, here are the ones that really stick out to me:
fics by @taelme
state of grace (photographer!johnny, my ult comfort fic, i literally read this and cry every month)
enchanted (regency!au, jaehyun)
treacherous (regency!au, johnny, enchanted spin-off)
make me move by @yutaholic
tis the damn season by @najaemism (celeb ex!mark, social media!au, another comfort read and i die of laughter every time)
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okay I’ve been wanting to ask you stuff for ur…ask game things but I genuinely cannot find the post to know what to ask. does that make sense?
So uh *slams random emojis and numbers on the counter* whatever these will get me.
32??? 1? 12….52?
🐢🧍♂️❤️🩹💕🤲🤩
I have to at least get one of those right…hopefully.
((also side note I’ve been meaning to say I like ur new username! very nice 👍))
Ember, I tried my very best to find old ask games I reblogged with these emojis, sadly I could not. I found this one for the numbers. I already answered 1 and 32 here. I answer 12 and 52 below and have a few other fun treats for you.
12. How does receiving or not receiving feedback/support help you?
Feedback helps me so much. It lets me know that my writing is good and that I’m doing something right. Originally, fanfic was just supposed to be me getting my brain bees™️ out of my head so I could focus. I didn’t expect people to actually enjoy them to such a degree. I mean, I figured someone else who liked TMBS might like them a little, but I did not expect such incredible feedback.
I got a tumblr in September of last year to release my thoughts on TMBS, including my SOS fan theory, but I never intended to write any fic about it, because it was a super specific head canon (and also I'd never even read fanfic before at that point, though I'd heard of the concept), I wasn't sure people would like it, I'd never done any serious creative writing before, and at the time, I had no idea how much season 2 canon would continue to support it's plausibility. But, for better or for worse, eventually I was inspired enough to write the fic. And if you told me in January of this year, before SOS was published, when it was just a little idea in my head that I’d have people drawing fan art based on my fics, doing elaborate analyses call out posts based on my fics (thank you @sophieswundergarten and @itsgoghtime🥰), making a whole personality quiz based on my fic (again thank you Sophie), getting a tumblr to compliment my on my fic and share headcanons, and, the latest of the fandom's beautiful compliments, someone doing a whole podcast episode based on one of my fics (thanks @heyitsthatonesmolgay), I would not have believed you.
This feedback means the world to me, and it's also taught me the importance of leaving feedback on other fics as well. Part of the rational in writing SOS was releasing the thoughts that are inside my head about my hyperfixation, since I'd be thinking about it constantly anyway. Writing it out is certainly more rewarded than daydreaming alone, but it's also more time consuming. Knowing that someone out there is not only listening to what I'm saying, but enjoying it to such a degree lets me know that this is a hobby that's worth the time and energy. Obviously, it's fine to do hobbies only for yourself, I did that for years, but being able to do something you enjoy in such a way that it makes someone else happier and brings joy to someone's life is incredibly rewarding. And if I didn't receive any feedback, I would assume no one was listening. I'd release my ideas into the void to get the brain bees out, and then when the hyperfixation died, I'd just delete them. But now I know that I'm not just talking to the void anymore, I'm talking to a group of people that are invested in the stories I have to share. Feedback on fics lets authors know that they're good at writing, because they might not know it. I certainly never thought so. Sure, I thought my ideas were cool, but has everyone else I've ranted to about mbs irl thought that? Not exactly. So leave feedback on your favorite fics, go crazy about them. Don't burn yourself out, obviously, but trust me, it will not go unappreciated, especially in a smaller fandom.
52. Do you respond to comments why or why not?
I always try to respond with something. They make me so happy; someone took the time out of their day to say they liked my fic, my ideas, and comment or ask questions about them! It’s a great honor, and thank you all for your lovely comments and feedback!
Finally, the emojis you sent didn't correspond to an ask game, however, I do have one little treat I think you'll like.
As you may be aware, I am writing a secret fan fic for Curio's secret fic gift exchange. I can't promise the fic is at the level of my usual work (as you may have suspected from my lack of SOS updates, I've been quite busy), but I shall try my best. However, what I can promise you is that A) more SOS is coming, and B) regardless of who my gift fic is for, it will include a brief reference or mention of the book "The Little Prince", which I know you are a big fan of. Unfortunately, I can't give any more context beyond that.
Oh, and thank you! I'm glad you like the new username!
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Gonna send a small amount, but there are multiple lol
🤩 What's the most meaningful comment you've ever received?
🎵Do you make playlists for your fics?
🎭What genre of writing comes easiest to you?
🙌What's a line or paragraph of yours that you're proud of?
1. I'd unironically, say that yours are some of the best I got! You analyzing my pieces of media is something I'll always hold dear.
2. Not really! I'd do for AUs as a whole but not fics.
3. Hurt/Confort!
4.
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Hi! For the ask game:
24 and 44 for F1
7 and 43 for Motogp
Thank you ❤️
(carlosheinz from her main blog)
Thanks for the ask @carlosheinz
24. Underrated ship you like?
I'd say Michael Italiano/Lando Norris. It's a bit harder to ship them now. But I liked the different dynamic here. Like driver/not his trainer.
Also, I'm writing a Charles/Oscar fic at the moment and... they could make sense!
44. if you were in f1 which team would you rather race for?
I'm into F1 nearly since I've been born (Thanks to my Mummy) and I've always been a Ferrari fan (even if it's getting harder and harder). So I'd say Ferrari. For the aura and the story. 🤩
That being said, I'm not sure I'd like the atmosphere there. I feel they want to make us think they are a familly but it's all business now!
McLaren gives me more familly vibes! So I'd say McLaren!
And Haas. Because working with Guenther must be fun! 😂
7. if you were in motogp who would like as a teammate?
Hard choice.
Enea because he's cute and look like a very nice and normal guy.
Aleix for the hugs!
Marc to learn from the best!
43. favourite bromance?
The VR46 whole Academy! You can't top that!
#f1#formula 1#mclaren#ferrari#ask game#ask me stuff#ask me things#haas f1 team#lando norris#michael italiano#charles leclerc#oscar piastri#enea bastianini#aleix espargaro#marc marquez#vr46 riders academy
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🥺🎢🎶🤩🤲 for the ask game, if you're still doing it! :3
Ah, it's never too late to send me ask questions!
-Is there a certain type of moment or common interaction between your characters that never fails to put you in your feels?
I adore building out the complicated feelings between Nemesis and Jill. A common interaction is where their minds do this 'mind bleed' between the two where their thoughts blend in this trippy way that reveals them at both their most vulnerable and their deeper thoughts, usually in mid-argument. Every time I do this it feels like a gut punch. I love it where you aren't certain who is speaking anymore, and how because of this thoughts that they wouldn't address normally with each other are forced to be. For example:
Jill remembered punching him, screaming at him in her pain, and he sat palms up and looked downwards please let me…let me sleep…please don’t steal my words, you monster! please let me…let me sleep…please, Father, we can’t if we kneel hard enough, will you, will it end
This little bit shows the way their thoughts, memories and fears blend with her recalling the first night where she broke down hitting him them sleeping with him, to his own traumatized memory bubbling, her confused thinking he was making her remember a bad thing he did to her to then realize he was referring to himself packing so much in so little. It's like writing little nuggets of character/lore building and pain that at times is soul crushing to me (which tells me I did it right).
-Which of your fics would you call your wildest ride?
I'd say my main one On a Devil's Wings is because you get a complete deconstruction of the whole Devil's Saga storyline, with both Jill and Nemesis deconstructed as characters, their motivations and internal selves broken down revealing so much unchecked baggage both from themselves and towards each other.
You also get:
4+ overlapping storylines including backstory
conspiracies involving the BSAA, Umbrella and society at large
explanation on what makes up a NE-T Tyrant biologically (and Sia)
filling RE3/5 plot holes
Ada and Carlos just being hot
Zeus. Just Zeus.
A lot of 4th wall riding/surrealism
A situation happens at a rave. I am not kidding.
It's my most ambitious story ever and is a genuine novel in how dense it is plotwise.
-Do you listen to music while you write? What song have you been playing on loop lately?
I am an intensely musical person (guess the times my word rhyming and alliteration goes into interesting 'patterns' lol) and am known for nearly always having a music rec linked in each fic. Lately, I've had this on loop
youtube
This gives me Jill vibes in her rise from the murky fall of her own fears and in demanding Nemesis to truly accept the role he keeps saying he wants with her and yet never fully submits to. I also have GODS by League of Legends and NewJeans on sometimes. I just like LoL music lately okay I don't even play LoL XD
-Who is your favorite character to write?
Hands down, Nemesis with Zeus a very close second. He's such a complicated traumatized monsterboy who painfully knows he is a tool and is so deeply angry at knowing that fact. While he keeps trying in ways to rebel finds every attempt - refusal to cooperate, sinking into his role as a ruthless killer letting black hate and rage guide him, to trying so hard to have his 'happy ending' at Jill's expense - painfully futile. Writing him trying to cope with all this on top of him trying to understand what intimacy (and no, sex does not inherently equal intimacy) is through a nonhuman filter is such a fun mindset to play with.
-Would you please share a snippet of a wip?
Sure! Snip from OaDWs:
“Seeing that my deceased co-conspirator had done work with live humans before, but he never thought to slow down the infestation rates in his subjects to engender a better bonding process. The idea I admittedly gleaned from that detestable Ashford woman; sometimes a bit of time to let an introduced vector rest in one’s subject is warranted. You Jillian made that a possibility even though you had the added protection of prior infestation.
“I wanted to see if I could expand on previous work…yet your sample didn’t seem all that operational at the time. Not until ‘patient zero’ awoke. It’s almost as if your suitor put himself on pause for you as your DNA caught up to his parameters! What a kindly gent. Sort of like with my other ‘sibling’, putting his life on pause for a greater cause than ‘survival’. Downside is he began to go over time ‘off the rails;’ so needing to meet out violence and evolve a world for an old man that gave him little thought!”
Wesker laughs, the cold lilt hinting of privileged upbringing lacing the braying sound.
Jill could only restrain the cold chill that ran up her spine as his words sank in. “That person…wasn’t you?”
“Didn’t you in your desperate and blind observations of me during our Africa tour not notice? You wanted me gone that badly? Or was it you wanted badly for my ‘death’ be true? I’m hurt, Jill.”
“Fuck you,” slid out of her mouth in a venomous hiss.
“Ah ah ah, that wasn’t part of our agreement. I did in fact honor that restriction unlike what you tell yourself with Christopher.”
Thanks for the ask as I sure had a lot to say!
(refers to this ask game post)
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For the Fanfic Wrapped Ask Game:
🤩,💖, 📚 and 😍 !
🤩 What's your favorite fic you posted this year?
I love all of them, but looking back at this year, I think I like My Best Enemy the most (although Never Let Me Go is probably the most well-written one). I had loads of fun writing it; I still think the idea of Jean staying behind in Marley is awesome, the plot came to me with no effort at all, and it was my first attempt at writing smut as well. Also, I was working on the last chapter at a tattoo studio while waiting for my appointment – which is very funny in retrospect.
💖 Was there a comment or another piece of feedback that made you feel all the warm and fuzzies?
Honestly, I'm blown away by the feedback I've gotten. I would probably have to mention each and every comment here because they all made my heart flutter. Every time someone told me I had turned them into a ReiJean fan, every time someone mentioned that my fic had made them feel better after a shitty day, every time someone confessed I had made them cry, every time someone took their precious time to write a whole chapter analysis, going over all the little details... I appreciate it so, so much.
📚 How many wips are you taking into 2024?
So... many. Battle Tendency is my main project at the moment, but I really want to write five short stories for the upcoming ReiJean Week (I hope I will be able to do that, I've already started working on them). Aside from those, I have that one dark WIP centered around the idea of the Alliance failing to stop Eren. I also want to write a longer post-Rumbling fic about Jean and Reiner slowly getting together (while trying not to get killed by assassins from Paradis). Last week I came up with an idea of a canon divergence AU where Eren and Mikasa escape from Marley together, and Paradis gets destroyed as a result (Jean survives thanks to my magic, obviously). I've already promised someone I'd write a sequel to One Night in Marley. I also had a request for an ABO-themed fic, although I'd like to take a rather unusual approach to it. And then there are several smaller WIPs I have mentioned on the blog before (the mafia/coffee shop AU, the Attack on School Castes-inspired one etc.). Basically, I have outlines for those stories, but I'm afraid I won't have enough time for all of them in 2024.
😍 What's one of your favorite lines or exchanges you wrote this year?
I'm fond of quite a few exchanges between Jean and Reiner, but the one that came to my mind now is from My Best Enemy – when Reiner and Jean are fighting for the first time, and Reiner berates Jean for his involvement in the Raid on Liberio:
“I don’t care if guilty conscience drives you mad or if you drown in your grief, but I will make sure that you don’t give your life for Eren.” Reiner keeps talking over him, all collected again. “I want you to live long enough to see past all of this. I will not let go of that kid who showed mercy to a monster in Shiganshina. I will not forsake the kid who had a heart big enough to save my life even when death was all I deserved. I want that kid back.”
Thank you!! 💜💜
Fanfic Wrapped Ask Game
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Fun fact I went through a breakup recently that was really jarring and left me feeling super alone and one of the coping strategies I found was to pretend that the previous versions of myself were there to comfort me. So I'd literally imagine different younger versions of myself from like 6 months, 1 year, etc ago being there and being like "hey, the fact that you were around the see the breakup means that you survived the pain we were going through, right? So that's good. And you'll survive this one." Sometimes I imagine them all sitting around my room and having a council, or I imagine them walking behind me when I feel unsure of myself. I also imagine them embracing me or bandaging my wounds when I really need it. Anyways, I support the Nico x Nico fic you're talking about writing-- self-love can hit the hardest, especially when it's the only kind of love currently within your reach.
Oh my god... I'm so sorry you have to go through such a horrible thing, and your coping mechanism is making me tear up. 😭😔 I hope you would feel better soon, pal.
And I really, really appreciate your support for the Nico selfcest AU! 😭 Fun fact for you too! I'm also an enthusiastic resident of a selfcest-based (?) fandom, and ofc, selfcest is a whole thing in there. It's my sanctuary and I have been the priest for as long as I can.
And Selflove Nico has been my religion since the first day I set foot into this fandom.
So yeah, I know what I'm doing. 😘🤩 I can't guarantee that I'd articulate it into a fully written fanfic - just bc I don't have the patience nor the willpower to come up with a multi-chaptered plot - but I'll try my best to deliver it the best way I can!
I would be glad if my crazy ideas make you feel better somehow.🥰 Wish you all the best, and please, keep loving yourself like that. You're doing great, friend.
#Tbh I have... not quite an issue but more like conflicting opinions ig?? about myself too LOL. it just makes this even more exhilarating#the selfcest fandom is Elsword btw. it's a Korean RPG game#pjo#nico di angelo#hoo#toa#yone rambling#percy jackson and the olympians#heroes of olympus#fanfic talk again bc what’s new anw?#trials of apollo#selfcest#selfcest au#selflove nico#selflove nico my religion
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Hello bestie!! Let’s have some fun 🤩
What fic do you want to ramble about? Tell me everything you love about it and all the behind the scenes stuff that we didn’t get to see.
If you could write an AU of one of your fics, what would it be?
What’s a story that you wrote that pushed you out of your comfort zone?
Fun! Reward for finishing grading! No longer having to look at the hopelessness of my students' assignment!!!!!
Ah, this is a mistake because I can (and have) gone on for several pages with behind the scenes stuff. Alas! The fic I want to talk about hasn't been published yet so I will find something else to talk about instead.
Let's go with the high school AU hmm? Firstly, the amount of background information that went into this series is extensive. Most of it never even makes it into the fics, but I have the class schedules and clubs for every single student in the AU, teacher schedules for all of the classes, and miniature biographies for all of the main characters tucked away in a folder.
All of this is worldbuilding that I worked on for close to three months before finally sitting down to write Invisible in January. The high school AU is one that has been sitting in the back of my mind since I first started thinking about the Alle's version series because it was so obvious to me what I was going to write with the cardigan/august/betty song cycle right from the start. At the same time, though, there was Miss Americana, which felt like a high school AU as well, but I feel like it's a concept I've already seen over and over again in the stevetony fandom, so I wasn't sure I wanted to write it. Then I was thinking about Natasha as a background character in the high school AU, maybe as Tony's sister, while I was watching CATFA, happened to look up while Bucky was talking about taking the girls out dancing and immediately went there's my Miss Americana and the Heartbreak Prince. And from there, the idea of twelve fics spanning ten relationships and four years just fell into place.
The hardest fic to come up with was the one from the Evermore album. Thor and Bruce had just kind of... landed in that spot because everyone else fit an album so perfectly from Peter/Harley/MJ fitting into Debut to Pepper/Rhodey fitting Midnights. I felt kind of bad honestly about Thor and Bruce being slotted into Evermore just because it was the last album, but I didn't know where else to put them! And then it was even worse because I kept listening to the album multiple times, hoping to find a song that would jump out at me like this is the song for Thor and Bruce, but nothing was coming to mind other than gold rush, which I wasn't 100% sold on since I felt like it was also a very stevetony song. I did eventually come up with a plot that made me happy enough with gold rush that I no longer felt like I was just cramming them together, but it was definitely a process.
Alright, so straight up AU, I'm gonna go alllllll the way back to one of the very first fics I ever posted and say Brewed Awakening because I'd love to see a version of this fic where almost everything is the same but Tony is also secretly Iron Man and so there's some bonus identity porn thrown into the mix on top of Steve being secretly Captain America.
So far as a different POV, I'd love to go back and do Steve's POV of All Too Well. It's a rough fic, and we only get Tony's perspective of the whole thing, and I think getting to explore what Steve was thinking during both his first relationship with Tony and then during his second when they had both matured would be a lot of fun.
I write a lot of things that push me out of my comfort zone, but this time I'm gonna go with Your Darkened Eyes. At the time, I'd never really written dark characters before. I had Hoist the Colors and Spoils of War, but those were both more dark-ish than they were actually dark characters. But with Your Darkened Eyes, I introduced this much darker version of Steve, who saw nothing wrong with seducing an underage Tony and then seducing his married counterpart as well, along with heavily implying that he had originally shown up with the intention of killing MCU Steve, and it was just a lot of fun for me to experiment with and step out of my comfort zone from my usual fluff and misunderstandings.
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Ok now I need to know the deranged details of your Modern AU Mat and Tuon please 🤩
I have a vague concept myself, where they meet in military school. Mat’s got real bad ADHD, medical trauma from a stint in rehab, and issues with authority figures. He got thrown into military school as a last-ditch tactic to straighten him out. Tuon is basically just Tulsi Gabbard; raised in a cult, going to military school still under full parental & cult control, heiress to a fascist political machine and very much bought in to the whole thing.
So ages ago I started a modern re-telling with the concept of 'What if the Dark One was so salty he recreated the "original" scenario where he lost several turnings later, only tweaked so the deck was super stacked again the Hero' and. Well. I abandoned it because there wasn't much interest and I got disheartened. I may pick it up again but who knows.
I am still very pleased with myself that the 'prophecies' were video games in the modern world.
(I guess this counts as a fanfic spoiler, idk.)
In the AU Mat was now Natalie "Mat" (never assigned a surname), a computer programmer/hacker/amateur musician. Typical bisexual disaster with bottle-red hair and hearing aids because she screwed around with too many fireworks. Known to mute said hearing aids when she was getting lectured. Dated the Rand-type character in the past. In major trouble with the law when the story begins which is not uncommon for her.
She's the type of person who dabbles in trouble as a hobby, from housebreaking to stealing a fox from the zoo. Unable to resist mischief. It's just impossible.
Has a little Scotty dog and an obnoxiously overweight corgi who wears sweaters.
Her first appearance was going to be at a bar being attacked by trollocs.
If I ever reached the point of the Seanchan I didn't have a ton of solid plans but I was very drawn to the idea of making Seanchan the same as it was, almost exactly as a slap in the face because I know there are people who get upset that Rand in the series doesn't "do something" and since actual Rand is in my fic we can traumatize him a little.
They'd be more modern, but Tuon was going to be similar to who she was with a nice added dose of No Homo. Only she's still got that knife kink and Nat is very Knife Positive so there'd be a nice Holy Shit I Am Very Gay For That Chaotic Woman dynamic. I wanted to give the modern Tuon more than just her potential to channel as a way to challenge her and her beliefs, and gay realizations are fun to write.
Also at some point I'd watched Black Panther so the Seanchan empire in hiding and only appearing to take over with crazy technology meanwhile actual fantasy monsters are running wild and the Seanchan would not be prepared for that at all Pleased Me.
Like. Imagine you bring your gun to a knife fight, and then somebody pulls out Treebeard who decks you. Exactly like that.
#wheel of time#wheel of time fanfiction#wheel of time book spoilers#matrim cauthon#Fortuona Athaem Devi Paendrag
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