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#idk i may continue this story later

i-luvsang · 2 years

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` , >. far too pretty — kang yeosang

¿ ｡′ gn!reader , fluff & hint of angst , cw: reader is described as pretty , wc: 0.4K ！！

kang yeosang is far too pretty. especially when he smiles.

and you? well, you are far too shameless.

especially when he smiles.

you’re aware that you’re staring at him with heart eyes, you gaze so full of shining adoration that it’s almost sickening. you can’t help it though, who wouldn’t fall for a smile like that?

but god, at this point you can’t tell whether or not you’re lucky yeosang hasn’t noticed a thing. it gives you the room to admire his face, and quite literally everything else about him the same shameless way that you are now. but sometimes it starts to feel a bit… lonely.

the same way it does now.

so, you force your face back to an expression of neutrality and allow your mind to wander, away from the same conversation that made him smile in the way that sparks the odd sensation of desire, adoration, and loneliness in your chest all at once. but it seems you let your mind wander a bit too far, because you don’t even notice everyone drift away until you and yeosang are the only two left in the living room. only his voice calling out your name brings you back to the present.

you tilt your head up to look at him and fight the heat rising to your face from the way he looks at you with a hint of concern in your features.

“huh? sorry, did you say something?” you internally cringe at the way your voice isn’t quite itself when you speak to him, cursing the way you start to lose your confidence under only his gaze.

“oh, uh. i was just asking if you were staying for dinner tonight. you didn’t say goodbye to anyone as they left so i figured…”

you glance around the room, only now processing the absence of the other boys.

“right! um, yeah. yeah, i’ll stay for dinner. i just spaced out, i guess,” you explain, trying to sound like you won’t melt into a puddle if he looks at you like that any longer.

to your relief, he does tear his gaze away from your face as his hand makes its way to rub the back of his neck, and, as per usual, you take the opportunity to drink in his gorgeous features.

“cool,” he says simply, clearing his throat and obviously at a loss for what to say next. he usually leans towards being speachless when he’s around you.

he just finds you far too pretty.

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ro-sso · 4 months

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thinking about all the forms of magic MC has used, just suddenly as if they are fully trained. also the lack of magical tools used feels weird? Like we got a rune ward for rune carving, and a shadow seeker vacuum, a fragment of aideens light and a bottle of aideens tears but these all do... nothing? We dont use the rune wand to help channel energy, or rune-work outside of that one questline.

idk if it's just me but with some of the more recent late-game quests it feels as though MC has suddenly become adept in magic after training in the Sun circle (& doing minor work in the lightning and moon circle). It feels quite... offputting but that could just be me being weird

#sso #sso critical #(kinda)#idk it just strikes me as odd. the amount of training MC was put through in the sun circle and then there was not as much put into any othe #circle. we did rune running (again with no rune wand) with rhiannon.#idk SSO feels very... patchworked atm and i get that its an 11 year old game so writers and other workers will have joined/left #but there's not much continuity in mind. it feels like no one has kept track of the storyline #or what they want the storyline to be. so as soon as you get past the opening scenes they now have (which for all we know could get retcon #you're in the wild west of lore. one thing mentioned may end up being incorrect later.#'For a long time' Anne was missing and Lisa after a tour with her band. we know Linda is missing for about a week or two [depending on how #long it takes for the player to get to that quest. for SSORidethrough that was on day 9 and if we add in the new opening of all soul riders #being there then thats roughly what you get i reckon.]#but yeah. sso story is inconsistent at best

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echos-gal · 13 days

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ok i'm rapidly losing hope that Tech is still alive, and this sucks because it was basically the top thing i desperately wanted from this season. i wanted to see him survive. so here's my exhaustive and embarrassingly long list of reasons why he SHOULD still be alive, and if he isn't, why it was a missed opportunity. obviously no hate to the writers or anything, i love them dearly for creating this show!!!

(if you're a "Tech should stay dead for the stakes/so someone in SW stays dead for once/i hate delusional Tech stans" person, kindly keep scrolling, this ain't for you)

SEASON 2:

right from the start, Romar connects with Tech and calls himself "a survivor." HELLO???

in this same arc, Tech breaks his leg in a fall which he survives. he continues to walk on it, fighting off troopers to save Echo & Omega, showcasing his persistence and grit.

one of Phee's first lines is "better late than dead," and we know she shares a connection with Tech. she flirts with him later in this scene. it would be a shame not to reuse this line, i'm just saying....

Cid still owes Tech for racing for her in Faster. we see Cid looking miserable as she betrays the batch in Plan 99, so her playing a part in his rescue/comeback would be a nice way to show her growth. (i'm afraid there isn't enough time for this, though- as much as i thought a Cid redemption was on the horizon!)

Phee and Tech's departure is awkward, and although we have some context from season 3 (they talked more than we realized), the scene would do best if reconciled in person imo. it felt like it was setting up for something, and feels weird to leave hanging.

"don't go running off with any pirates or smugglers" could not have just been a throw away line. it set up for him to do exactly that. how fitting would it be if pirates or smugglers actually did manage to pick him up before the empire made it to the railcar crash site?

Hemlock's retrieval of the goggles shows that he sent a team to look through the wreckage. he thought there was a chance Tech survived, and may have him.

i won't go into the logistics, but big falls ARE survivable. in star wars especially. we have no idea what was below the layer of clouds/mist Tech fell through.

SEASON 3:

this is mostly CX-2 centric. their armor is very similar: the jaw/mouth shape, the hexagons over the ears, the rectangles on the chest, and the pouches/pockets.

"domicile." that is all.

CX-2 uses technology more than the other operatives we've seen, and he gets past the encryption on Phee's ship with ease.

"who are you?" was enunciated in the exact same way Tech says it to Trace and Rafa, which i definitely think was intentional.

CX-2 stops to use his rifle scope in the exact same spot where Tech and Phee stood to let down the ladders in the sea surge on Pabu.

he survives a waterfall plunge on Teth, which appears to have fooled Rex's group into thinking he'd died. the writers could have killed him off there and sent a new operative, but they chose to stick with CX-2 pursuing them to Pabu.

it's worth noting that while this CX is designated as "2," Tech's CT number is CT-9902. he is associated with the number even on a visual level: he's a dual-wielder, he wears goggles, he salutes with two fingers.

FROM A STORY PERSPECTIVE:

firstly, i am sorry and i LOVE the writers, but if you want people to accept a character's death, you've got to show his family and friends' grief. we saw no reaction from Crosshair or Phee, no tears from Hunter or Echo. it feels like fans were sadder about Tech's death than the characters in the story.

Tech seems to have been mentioned more in the second half of season 3 than the first half, which works if they want to bring him back in the finale.

the finale is called "The Cavalry Has Arrived." i really don't think you can have the cavalry (aka the bad batch) arrive without every member present. i also don't think it would feel right to play their theme without Tech there. idk, that feels incomplete!

we saw no body, and Hunter received Tech's goggles not from a trusted ally or friend, but from Hemlock. this calls into question the legitimacy of his claim that the goggles were "all he could salvage."

Tech alive and being held on Tantiss would provide a nice parallel to Echo in the first mission where we meet the batch, in TCW. and [ep 14 SPOILERS] we see that Echo is currently looking more like his TCW self, with his earpiece removed.

feels kinda sour that a character who a lot of people related to as neurodivergent representation would die just a few episodes after having a deep conversation with his sister about it.

likewise (and as a white woman i can't speak for WOC), from what i have seen, Black women are rarely the main love interest of a series! Phee is the ONLY love interest in this whole show, and it would suck to just cut off that romance before it could really become something. a lot of people wanted to see TechPhee become canon.

CX-2 is the one who destroys the marauder. it works well storywise for its pilot to have been the one to do that- the person who worked so hard modifying it, flying it, and teaching his sister to fly it. i'll be lowkey pissed if it turns out some random dude blew it up.

it's also CX-2 who invades and sets fire to Pabu. this is emotionally gripping on its own, but if he is Tech, it's even more so.

we have no idea what the operatives go through. Crosshair isn't telling, but it clearly put him in a really bad place. if Tech underwent this conditioning in his post-fall injured state, there's a chance he could come back from it. Emerie is probably the key to this, if they take the CX-2 route.

this show is all about a family trying to stay together as the Empire desperately tries to rip them apart. seeing the whole family together again - even if not everyone survives - in the finale is the satisfaction that the show ideally would go for. the last time they were all together was the season 1 finale. that was about 2 years ago in the show's timeline.

leaving Crosshair and Tech's final interactions be where they parted on the Kamino platform also feels off. Tech was the one who really vocalized the need to rescue Crosshair in season 2's finale. Crosshair, in the meantime, has changed significantly as a person. Tech's comment about Crosshair being "severe and unyielding," and unable to change this facet of his nature, is incorrect. leaving Tech dead would mean that he never gets to see this change in Crosshair, which makes me feel like a deflated balloon.

FROM MY SELFISH PERSPECTIVE!!!

give me Tech with cool scars and slightly disheveled longer hair. this is such a good opportunity for the creators to give him a sweet new look!

we never got to see Tech without his goggles on, despite Phee constantly referring to his eyes. he definitely doesn't have them right now (they're in the Archium), so we could get Mister Big Brown Eyes if he's alive. it's another missed opportunity if not, imo!

the goggles being placed in the Archium was a beautiful scene that makes me tear up whenever i think about it. it's symbolic, it's bittersweet, and it's exactly where the goggles belong. but was it closure for me? not really.

Tech is a character who became a LOT of people's favorite in season 2, including my own. why kill off a fan-favorite with an entire season to go?

yes, i desperately want a Rex and Echo series. yes, i want the batch to cameo in it, and yes... that includes Tech. making up for lost season 3 Tech content 😎

the finale will feature the zillo beast, and Tech loves the zillo beast. FREE HER! REUNITE THEM! he would love to witness her rampage.

FROM A "SURPRISE!!!!!" PERSPECTIVE

it seems like most people think Tech is either CX-2 or dead. it would be a great finale twist if we DID get CX-2's identity, it's NOT Tech, the audience loses hope, and then he shows up. i think this is actually plausible given the other assassin schematics Hemlock was looking at in Point of No Return. Tech might be in Hemlock's grasp, but not an active operative. having an enhanced clone to toy with is something Hemlock would want to keep under wraps. we see him step out of the assassin chamber at the start of that episode - if Tech is anywhere on Tantiss, i think it's here.

i think the writers have expected us to have all lost hope by now, so his finale reappearance would ideally come as a shock. the finale is almost guaranteed to be a very long episode, so we really might have quite a bit of time to explore his return, if it happens.

secret 16th episode: i know, i'm putting my clown makeup on as i type this. but the previous 2 seasons each had 16 episodes, with a two-parter finale. season 3 is just 15, with a single episode finale. TBB formally ends may 1st, so what if we get a may 4th surprise episode detailing how Tech survived? (that or an epilogue leading into a new series, which i think is more likely actually!)

#i definitely forgot some points but i just need to post this and be done with it #feel free to add your own observations 👀#tbb tech #the bad batch #tech lives #techphee #tbb spoilers #the bad batch spoilers

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chaoticbardlady99 · 3 months

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Maryë (Astarion x GN! AFAB Reader) MDNI 18 +

Synopsis: Astarion left to explore the world and himself following the death of the Netherbrain. You remain in Baldur’s Gate with your brother, Gale, resigning yourself to your fate as Astarion’s friend until you die. Until one day, you and Astarion begin to write letters back and forth. Except there is one letter in particular that you suspect isn’t from Astarion…

CW: minimal mentions of violence, smut, Oral (Female Receiving), PIV, Tav’s also just an oblivious idiot who apparently doesn’t think very hard about words (it’s me, I’m Tav the idiot and this is like my Fiancé and I’s friendship prior to ya know, dating lmfao)

Author note- I might also write this in AMAB! Format, but I need to do some… research first for accuracy. This is lightly edited and just some silly little thought I had. I wanted to write something not so detailed for once while I work on my drafts for Lethal Woman and She’s Not Acid Nor Alkaline. Also def stole a line from Tolkien and added to it at the end (this is me crediting).

You’ll either love this or hate this idk.

The title literally translates to Home in Elvish.

Photo belongs to idk who so please reach out if it’s yours!

As always- likes, comments, and reblogs are always appreciated, I am just terrible at responding.

Tav,

As much as I enjoy our current form of communication- I was wondering if I could come to see you in person.

I have so much I need to say to you and I want to be able to do it in person- the proper way.

I hope to hear from you soon.

Yours,

Astarion

You sit and stare at the letter like you have been doing for the last week since you received it. Unlike your half-brother, Gale, you are not one for words. It was hard to respond to Astarion’s letters initially until Gale “doctored” your responses- often putting whatever silly accomplishment you have achieved lately or stories Gale found interesting from your recent solo adventures.

“Are you going to write the letter or are you hoping it’s going to write itself?” Gale teases.

You scowl at him and shake your head.

“I don’t know what to write back.”

“I could come up with a couple things!” Gale clears his throat, “‘ Oh Astarion- I’ve missed you terribly this whole time! I regret telling you that we should be friends until you figure things out! Despite my VERY WISE BROTHER’S ADVICE TO NOT DO THAT! I wait like a lovesick puppy at the mailbox every week hoping a letter may arrive!’”

You roll your eyes at him and throw one of his many decorative couch pillows at his head. He certainly has your mother’s flair for the dramatic. However, you can’t necessarily say he’s wrong- you have been nothing less than a smitten school girl waiting for letters non-stop.

Astarion had gone back to the Underdark after the last battle with the Netherbrain. He told you that he wanted to go and explore who he is- the world too.

You had been as enthusiastic as you could about the decision considering you had come up to him at the party with a letter in your hands asking if he would like to continue traveling with you after this- you had been too scared to say it outloud. A part of you hoped it may allow your romance to blossom without the impending threat of death at every corner. Well, if he still harbored any feelings for you at all.

You had merely smiled and told him how excited you are for him. It answered the silent question that had been there- was there still room in Astarion’s heart for you after you said you should just be friends and try again later?

The answer was ‘no’, despite Gale’s perplexed face and lecture when he found out you gave the spawn a send off with a ‘long’ hug (he made you describe it in detail). You refuse to give yourself any hope- you will remain a dutiful friend since you resigned yourself to this fate.

Then you received a Sending spell with him requesting your address and the letters began. You squealed like a schoolgirl when the first one came in and ripped it open enthusiastically. You didn’t realize Gale was home, otherwise you wouldn’t have read it out in the open- Tara snitched on you!

You had only truly met Gale around a couple months prior to your mutual abduction. Your mother had asked you to assist a brother you never knew about in finding magical artifacts- you quickly learned it was because the man was becoming a damn recluse.

You had worried he’d slam the door in your face or turn you into a sheep for all of eternity- the minute you told him your name was Tav Dekarios, he pulled you in for a hug and told you he had been awaiting your arrival. Gale was thrilled to know that, like him, you were also a prodigy in your craft.

You are a virtuoso master with any instrument you touch and you cast spells that are almost far too good to be true. You became Oghma’s Chosen in your teen years after spending many years practicing under his mentorship (which is why you and Gale had a very weird, serious talk one night about how Mystra is kind of a fucking pedophile) and that allowed you to do incredible things.

Your notes could create shimmery images and tell stories- Arabella and the other tiefling children (even the very tough Mol) enjoy coming over and watching war tales be told with nothing but a drum and a rain stick. Sometimes you let them tell tales and you come up with a tune to match it- eventually finding a rhythm to put your mind into and create the picture.

It was one of the many things Astarion mentioned in his note- he stated that none of the other Bards even begin to hold a candle to your talent. You blushed deeply when you read the line.

He told you about everything he had seen, everyone he had met, what he’s found out about himself, and shockingly enough- how much he misses you. It had taken you by total surprise, but you responded saying you missed him too.

Pet names began to flow easily into inked lines and it felt like you had a tiny part of him back in your life- your friendship is still as strong as it was before he left.

The letters have quickly become the best part of your week and occasionally you’ll read them with Arabella. She ooos and awwws, then attempts to bully you into tell Astarion your feelings. You cast a mini rain shower over her head with a few poetic words for the suggestion. You don’t want to ruin what you have and there is always the possibility that he found someone else.

However, you weren’t unsure of this particular note because you didn’t want to see Astarion- you would love that. The issue is that it doesn’t look like his handwriting, it isn’t the paper he uses (he’s ridiculously particular), and it doesn’t flow. Gale thinks you are over analyzing it, but you are pretty sure that this isn’t Astarion’s writing. He also addresses you as “Darling” not Tav and signs the letter of with “‘Órenya ná órelya” (my heart is your heart) not “Yours”.

You’ve waited for another note to come in since, but nothing has. You are beginning to wonder if Gale is right and you really are just being paranoid.

“I already told you, Gale,” you say with annoyance, “something isn’t right about this note. I don’t think this is from him which is worrisome because that means I haven’t heard from him in two weeks WHICH could MEAN-“

“For the love of Gods- TAV,” Gale yells, effectively shutting you up, “my young, oblivious little sibling. Just say yes and let him come visit.”

*********************************************************

It had been two days since you sent the sending stone and there was no response. Not that it would have mattered anyway considering you are somewhere in the Underdark in a very beautifully lit cave. Neon, blue veins of magic run through the rock. The pathway is lit with glowing flowers and…. Benches?

It had all happened so fast. One moment you were walking home from the market and the next- Astarion had come up to you from an alleyway and said he needed help. He had told you that he would love to catch up, but there is an injured child around the corner and since he can only stay in the shadows, he needs you to help them. Before you knew it- someone hit you with a sleep spell and the last thing you remember seeing is stars as your head slammed into the pavement. Oh and a, “oooooffff my bad” before you blacked out.

You blink your eyes a few more times, trying to figure out what in the wretched hells is going on.

“Oh for the love of- I told you to talk to Oghma’s Chosen! Not kidnap her and give her a serious concussion!”

A hazy, short figure comes into your vision. Is that…. a Deep Gnome?

“You told us it was imperative for the wedding! We intercepted the real letter and wrote this one,” another Gnome says, “and it worked! They showed up and everything! We’ve been watching since you told us to talk to her two weeks ago! We were running out of time for talking and bargaining so we just-“

“Kidnapped them!” the man yells, “you kidnapped them!? You- you imbeciles! They are supposed to want to perform for the wedding- you had at least six more hours! AND I GAVE YOU TWO WEEKS!”

“But Walby-“

Walby.

You know Walby! He and Barcus have been dating for a while now and the two are over the moon smitten. You are very happy for Barcus- this man is everything Wulbern could never be.

“No! I have had enough of your silliness! Leave me at once!”

You hear the three Gnomes that supposedly ambushed you walk off in angry huffs. A flash of healing magic fills the air and your head is finally clear- your ears no longer ringing like a triangle.

“My apologies, Ms.Dekarios,” Walby, says, “I wanted them to give you an invitation to come to Barcus’ and I’s wedding this afternoon, but as you heard, they are not the brightest bunch.

“It’s a very last minute ceremony- my mother is ill and she wants to see her ‘baby’ get married before she goes. We wanted to wait another year to plan, but oh you know how it goes!”

Walby looks at you sheepishly as you blink a few more times and let his words sink in. You look at the man and try not to throw up from sitting upright. You must have been out for a while, but not in a “oh that was a wonderful beauty nap” kind of way. You are pretty sure you have a decent amount of blood caked to the side of your head and neck right now.

“Oh, well in that case,” you offer a good natured smile, “I’ll consider this the most unique wedding invitation I’ve ever received and one I may not even have the privilege of remembering.”

The man laughs heartily as you stand up and brush your clothing off. You’re glad you wore a nicer outfit today and decided to bring your violin along- Oghma must have wanted to make sure you were prepared.

“I also wanted to ask a favor,” he says meekly, “if I haven’t fallen out of your good graces before I even stepped foot in them- that is.”

You smile and just roll your eyes.

“Consider it water under the bridge. How can I be of service?”

“Well, you see- we had asked an acquaintance of ours to play music and uh. There’s no easy way to put this, but he was run over by a herd of Deep Rothé.”

“Hmm,” you say with a snort, “tough crowd- Deep Rothés.”

Ultimately, you agreed to perform for the ceremony and the little dinner party afterwards. Your music decorated the air with golds and silvers. Barcus was thrilled to have you there and thanked you immensely for allowing his mother-in-law to “witness true magic” before she leaves this plane.

By the time you were finally leaving- you hear two very familiar voices scream your name and come barreling towards you.

*****************************************

Astarion and Gale are practically sprinting as they try to track your location through the streets of Baldur’s Gate. They had just found a large spot of your blood sticking to the cobblestone and leading to the sewer. Astarion feels sick when he notices the path leads back into the Crimson Palace. Thankfully it was through the sewer and straight to the tunnel of the Underdark.

He had sent you a letter a few days ago and he had confessed his feelings. Instead of waiting for you to respond like a sane person, Astarion got the hell out of the inn he was staying at and began the four day trek to Baldur’s Gate. The nice part about traveling alone and not needing to breath is that Astarion could run from place to place if he was in a hurry or was just fed up with traveling already.

Astarion quickly learned that it was boring to be alone and it’s far more fun to share adventures with you. He also learned that he might be a semi-decent person on his own because, in spite of being without your physical presence, he continues to fucking help people. Astarion is really over this whole moral compass thing (it only extends so far though, he’s still a proud Bastard at heart).

When he arrived at your home about an hour and a half ago, Gale had informed him that you had gone out to the Market and was confused when Astarion said his letter shouldn’t have arrived yet. It took longer than usual to write for… reasons.

Gale showed him the note you received and the two of them pieced together that someone had definitely set up a trap- just not a very good one. Astarion pinched the bridge of his nose when Gale told him that you definitely figured out the letter wasn’t from him, but Gale encouraged you to respond anyway.

A part of him is incredibly worried that some of the remaining Bhaal cultists have taken you since they are the only people he could think of that would be able to mimic his form. His stomach still turns when he thinks about the time they realized Orin had taken you. This is giving him the same queasy feeling.

So imagine his and Gale’s surprise when you are walking away from some random spot seemingly unscathed. Except Astarion won’t believe that until he has inspected you for injuries himself.

You look positively shell-shocked to see him and even more surprised when he’s taking your face gently in his hands and begins to check for injuries.

“Are you alright, Darling?” He says in a far more panicked voice than he means to, “we found blood- I thought the worst and your idiot brother! Of course that letter wasn’t from me! I have class, my Dear! I would never use that paper and WHY IN THE HELLS WOULD YOU FOLLOW ME OF ALL PEOPLE!?”

He knows his ‘rage’ doesn’t sound like rage- it sounds like a man who thought his only love had been on the brink of death only moments ago. Astarion is trying to keep a serious face, but the adoration and love in your eyes when you look at him is making him want to dissolve. He’s thrilled to see that after a whole year of not being together that your feelings haven’t waivered. Neither have his, obviously, but that’s why he’s here.

“I will say, Tav,” Gale says with exasperation, “you even gave Tara a fright- you should be expecting a very long lecture when we get home.”

“Oh I’m sure I will,” you say with a beaming smile, your eyes never leaving Astarion’s, “but I do have quite the story if you would like to hear it?”

Astarion’s grin stretches across his entire face.

“I think a good story, better company, and some wine would make for a fine evening, my Dear.”

“Gross!” Gale says, “but I’ll tag along for some wine.”

Oh dammit.

****************************

If Astarion wasn’t so busy feasting upon you- then he probably would have already hunted down those stupid Gnomes that gave him a fright and found a windmill to fling them from. Gale had left only 15 minutes ago, but Astarion had made quick work in getting you up to his room and having his way with you.

The minute Gale left, the conversation became flirty and teasing- all the want that has been pooling in his body is finally getting the release it needs. You, like always, are a sight to behold.

Your back arches when his tongue drags along your clit and Astarion pushes your hips down into the mattress as your arousal paints his lips. Your moans and desperate cries of pleasure are so delicious and his cock is painfully hard, straining against his leather pants.. He is fighting between taking his time and being selfish- chasing his own pleasure inside of you.

The moment you clench around his fingers is the same moment he unlaces his own pants and begins to remove them. You keen and whine underneath him- Astarion’s name sounds the best coming from you in this state.

Astarion should be a gentleman, hypothetically, and maybe give you a half a second to be a little less dazed from your orgasm. Except Astarion isn’t a gentleman and he isn’t patient- at all.

Astarion lifts your hips up to his until the head of his cock is aligned with your entrance and he thrusts himself inside of you. You immediately wrap your legs around his hips with a yelp of pleasure and your eyes flutter wildly as you take his whole length. Astarion smiles down at you as he slowly rocks in and out of you.

Your fingers find their way to his hair and you pull Astarion’s face down to yours- stunning him with a mind numbing kiss. He snaps his hips at the sensation and the moan you let out causes whatever resolve he had to break. Astarion releases the hold you have on his lips and kisses along your jaw up to your ear.

“Did you like that, my Love?”

You hum in approval and try to pull his mouth back to yours. He interrupts you by thrusting into you two more times with more power than the first one.

“Asta-,,” you attempt to say his name between thrusts, “Astarion please.”

“You didn’t answer my question, Pet,” he teases, “I don’t even know if I know what you like anymore- maybe you don’t even like thi-“

Your legs tighten around his hips as he goes to pull completely out of you. Astarion quirks his eyebrow at you with a smirk as you look at him with desperation.

“I more than liked it- I loved it,” you whisper with your cheeks burning from your shyness.

Oh and how Astarion loves your shyness. His hands fist the sheets as he starts his agonizingly slow rhythm inside of you again- whimpers falling from deep within your chest.

“See, Darling,” Astarion says as his face falls into the crook of your neck, “that wasn’t so difficult, now was it?”

He doesn’t even give you a chance to respond before Astarion’s hips begin to pick up speed and his mouth covers yours. As much as he loves to hear you moan- he doesn’t care to share that experience with any of the patrons that had been obviously checking you out while you were catching up.

Astarion groans against your lips as he continues to fuck you relentlessly- his fangs nip at your lower lip and lap at the tiny droplets of blood that seep from the punctures.

You are a mess underneath him and you feel incredible in every way possible. Astarion never wanted this to stop in the first place- back when he had told you his feelings and you said it would be best to be friends for the time being.

Perhaps that’s what causes him to slow down and kiss you deeply- making up for the lack of speed with more force. One of his hands trails along your chest and begins to tease your sensitive nipples- your walls clench around him hard when he begins to pinch and roll the right one and your orgasm coats him as he moves to play with the left.

You kiss him sloppily and he’s lazily thrusting into you- his own Little Death following yours within seconds. Astarion collapses on top of you as he begins to soften inside of you. The smell of you and him mixed together is intoxicating and your heartbeat is hammering from the pleasure- your eyes glassy and tired with bliss. He laughs breathily before placing a kiss on your swollen lips.

Astarion lifts you up ever so slightly so that he can pull the blanket down and over you, then he adjusts himself and you so that you are curled up with your ear pressed against his chest. He strokes your hair absentmindedly and you lightly draw shapes on his chest.

“I’m so glad you’re back,” you say sleepily, “I’ve missed you so much.”

I’ve missed you too, Darling,” Astarion says while pressing a kiss to your forehead, “I’m happy to be home.”

“Oh I’m sure Baldur’s Gate is-“

“You are my home,” Astarion interrupts you, “I’ve come to realize that wherever you are is where I want to be.”

You look up at him with tears in your eyes and happiness in your heart.

“But what about exploring your new life and all of that jazz?”

“Darling, I wouldn’t have a life if it weren’t for you,” Astarion states, “you helped me kill Cazador and break the cycle of ongoing abuse. You gave me life so I could live it and I want to live it with you. I’m tired of pretending I’m okay with just being friends and holding back my feelings. I want to share my life with you.

“I know this may all seem very fast, but” Astarion grabs his pants off the ground and he feels his stomach turn as he pulls the box out of his pocket, “I know I love you- that’s probably the only thing I’ve ever been sure of in my entire 239 years of existence. I- I wanted to know if you would… marry me?”

Your lips are on his within seconds and the two of you become entangled in soft kisses until you have to pull back for air. You lean your forehead against his and meet his gaze.

“I love you so much, Astarion. Yes- yes I will marry you,” you say tearfully, “I want to share my life with you too.”

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ahgasegotarmy116 · 4 months

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He Doesn't Deserve You | A Jeon Jungkook Series | Chapter One

Summary: Life didn't turn out the way you wanted. You got the guy, and the job but everything else you had ever wanted has been crumbling around you. Pairing: Noona reader x Jeon Jungkook (She's 28 and he's 22) Word Count: 2.1k~ Warnings: yändere, manipulation, domestic violence, self harm, cheating, explicit language, hints at smut, angst, idk what else lol a/n: Ahh thank you so much for all of the love so far on the intro and even all the notes on the masterlist hehe. I'm really loving the direction this story is going in so I hope you guys will too! And thanks again to @kkusadmirer for the request!

Opening my laptop I pull up the most recent edit I had done on the next chapter I was working on.

I'm a writer, not an incredibly famous one but a writer nonetheless. I make enough to get by and I'm able to work from home so that's all I ever really wanted. Just a silly girl, writing her silly stories, living her silly life.

But unfortunately things don't always turn out the way you want them to.

I thought I had it all, perfect grades and a perfect boyfriend with a loving family and a bright bright future. Now looking back at it all and seeing all of the stuff in the background that I somehow missed just makes me feel foolish.

How could I not notice Taehyung wondering eye? Why did I not listen to what my friends used to say about him? Why did I leave all of my friends behind for him?

Being so wrapped up and so in love with him I didn't even notice the fact that my family was falling apart. My mom cheated on my dad and I never knew until they told me they were getting a divorce.

While my brother was struggling in high school while being around all of their screaming and fighting and finally got committed to a mental institution when he had a psychotic break.

I never knew anything about that. It's not like I didn't care, but I just never really reached out or gave them enough time to reach out to me.

I was always like 'Oh Tae just got home I have to go' or 'Tae is expecting me so I need to get going'. My world has revolved around him for so long that my family and friends feel like strangers.

How could I have been so stupid and neglected them, all for one guy?

The one that I wanted to build a future with and promised to do the same with me. Now here I am, 24 with student loans up to my neck and a sorry excuse for a marriage with a husband that is never home.

I don't know what I managed to do in my past life that ended up royally fucking me up in this one but I'm sorry. Why couldn't I have done better so I would be saved from having my spirit broken and my heart ripped to shreds.

The only positive thing is that this has given me is the inspiration to come up with an even more fucked up series of books that has been my only source of income for the past few years.

Years, wow.

Thinking about how much time has passed and how things went to shit so quickly helped me continue down this downward spiral and I don't know how to make it stop. Although the sound of keys jingling outside the front door is my rude awakening, my brain knowing I need to be conscious of what may happen next.

I quickly wipe off the tears that I didn't even realized had started to fall and clear my throat. Moments later I'm met with the sight of Taehyung walking in wearing the same shirt I had seen him in yesterday but sports a brand new hickey near the collar, just barely noticeable but he makes no effort to hide it.

"Y/n" I hear him call out, breaking me out of my train of thought. "Yes?" I question, hating that I've been caught off guard even though I was staring right at him. "I asked if we have anything to eat" he says, making his way over to the refrigerator, now going to see if he can answer his own question before I'm even given another second to speak up.

"Um yeah I think there's some left over pizza from last night" I say and get up to walk towards him. "So how was work yesterday?" I ask tentatively, still not sure what kind of mood he's in. "Exhausting but it is what it is I guess" he says while stuffing his face full of a cold slice of pepperoni pizza.

I turn to walk away while nodding my head, not bothering to ask anything else since it seems from his vague answers that he's not in the mood to talk.

"Hey" he says, gently grabbing my wrist with the hand that wasn't occupied with the pizza, leaving me frozen in place. I know better than to walk away from him. Even if he's not mad at the moment doesn't mean that he won't be in the next.

"Where are you running off to?" he asks pulling me close by that same wrist. Still doing so carefully but pressing on the bruises that he had left there from the last fight we had.

He sees my slight look of discomfort and how my vision is trained on the wrist he's still holding and rolls up my sleeve, taking a quick look and seeing the evidence of his past transgressions.

"It left a mark huh?" he says examining the spot further and then bringing it up to his face where he places a few featherlight kisses on it, making a flash of heat run through my system when he looks back up at me with those eyes.

Those bedroom eyes that never fail to put me in a trance. He lifts his hand up towards my face and I flinch not knowing what to expect and see him stopping for a second, surprised by my reaction.

"Don't be afraid baby, it's just me" he says and keeps going, hooking his finger on the collar of my turtleneck to pull it to the side, no doubt searching for other marks.

"There's marks here too. I guess it's a good thing you stay home. Don't want to have to make up excuses for those now would you?" he says tapping under my chin twice, a slight lilt in his tone, enjoying my clear discomfort in showing them to someone, even if it's the person that's caused them.

"What did you do today baby?" he asks, letting go of me and going back to grab a few other things out of the fridge to complete his meal. "Oh you know, just some writing" I say, trailing off and giving him the same answer that I've given him time and time again.

"You almost done with it?" he questions, only really asking so he knows when my next big payday will be.

I shake my head "No, not yet. I think I'm only about halfway though" I say, giving simple answers to his simple questions. "Well you better get it out soon. I bet your readers are dying to know what happens next" he says giving me a quick wink before taking everything he has in his hands and carrying it over to the couch.

"Do you think you could grab me a beer?" he asks, but I know it's more of a courtesy than anything phrasing it like I actually had an option. I respond with a quiet yeah and bring it over to him, placing it on the coffee table.

"Thanks babe" he says and grabs a ahold of my hand and angles his head up, clearly asking for a kiss to which I oblige. Again something I don't really have an option in doing. "I missed you" he says and rubs his nose against mine cutely, or at least it used to be cute. Now it just makes me sad thinking of all of those times when we were happy.

"Are you gonna watch the game with me?" this time giving me something that I actually have a choice in. "I think I've got some more writing I'd like to do" I say and he nods his head not even bothering to look at me or give me a verbal sign of acknowledgment before turning on said game and slumping back into the couch to watch.

I walk over to my desk that happens to unfortunately be in the living room so I'm forced to grab my headphones to drown out the sound so I can hopefully get another chapter or two in before I call it a night.

~~~~~~

"Baby" I hear him call for me through my headphones after some time, that's something that I've had to fine tune. Making sure I can hear him when he talks to me no matter what so it's one less thing I have to worry about him getting upset about.

I pull out my headphones and turn my attention towards him, half expecting him to ask me to get him a beer. "Yes?" I reply, waiting to see what he needs. "Come here" he says holding his hand out to me and spreading his legs, showing me where he wants me.

I get up and walk towards him, straddling him once I get close enough and putting my arms around his neck. "Hi" he says in a deep voice sending a shockwave through my nervous system. "Hi" I respond quietly, intimidated at the thought of what he might do next. "How was the game?" I ask tentatively, hoping for my own sake that there was a favorable result.

"We won" he says, mindlessly tracing his hands up and down my curves. "How's your book?" he asks leaning into my neck, placing kisses over the bruises he had noticed from before. "

It's going" I whisper, starting to feel breathless from his warm breath fanning the sensitive parts of my skin. "Ready for a break?" he asks, question laced with a mischievous tone. I hum in acknowledgment, tilting my head to the side so he can have his fun.

~~~~~~

"I'm gonna head out but I'll be back later" Taehyung says while getting dressed with me still laying there with only a sheet to cover my body. "You're leaving?" I question, knowing he just said that but hoping he'll give me some sort of explanation.

"The guys wanted to meet up for a couple of drinks to talk about the game. Get some rest okay? I'll be back in a few hours" he says planting a soft kiss on my lips and one on my forehead.

I nod as he pulls the comforter over me as well, starting to already to drift off to sleep. "Stay safe" I mumble and flip over to the other side to try and get more comfortable.

He looks down at me for a second and chuckles at my fucked out and sleepy state before walking out of our bedroom and soon I'm left with the sound of him closing and locking the door behind him.

Although this night was bittersweet I'm thankful that it ended up like this. He's not a selfish lover when it comes to sex so I'm always left sleepy and satisfied except for the times that he's more rough, rough is putting it lightly so I guess I should say when he's more violent.

I hate thinking about those nights and I refuse to let those dark thoughts cloud this physical euphoric feeling I have but I can't help but worry about what he might actually be going out to do.

Would having a drink with the guys really make him want to leave his naked and freshly fucked wife alone in his bed? I just don't get it. If he's already been with me tonight could there be a possibility that he would wake up in another woman's bed and leave me waking up alone again tomorrow?

There's no use worrying about it though. It's not like it hasn't happened before, but why do I always let it get to me? Yes he's my husband but our marriage isn't like other ones in anyway shape or form. I'm here when he wants or needs me and that's it. I'm not allowed to want or need him because I'm just left disappointed every single time.

He doesn't love me, he just loves what I can give him and I need to come to terms with that. But it's nights like these where he's gentle and whispers sweet nothings in my ear that make me second guess things.

Maybe he's changed? Maybe he's realized what actually matters? And maybe I'm just getting my hopes up. I can't keep lying to myself but I don't know what else to do. I feel alone most days but these little glimmers of hope are what keep me holding on and unfortunately that's all I have left.

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kuromochimi · 5 months

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Pros and Cons

Rin Itoshi x F!Reader

If you’ve seen friends or if you want to see where I got the prompt from, it’s from when ross had to choose between two girls and made a pros and cons list to help him decide.

Content: angst to fluff, aged up characters (18+), not proof read

Rin didn’t think he’d ever end up in such a situation. See, despite there being a long line of women willing to climb mountains just to have a chance at being with rin, he very rarely entertained any of them… mostly because he already had his eyes set on someone else. You. But life’s circumstances never really gave you two any way to work on what you both knew could happen. He was mostly having away games or training and you were too busy with a blooming career somewhere far from where he usually wad. “It’s not the time”. The line rin would always tell himself. The right time just never seemed to present itself.

Unfortunately, time won’t always be friendly to continuously missed chances. After years of not having anything happen, rin came to the conclusion that maybe it just wasn’t meant to be. Besides, you’ve had a few boyfriends and situationships here and there and rin, being surrounded by his team mates and their stories about how good it feels to have someone supporting them from the stands, he got impatient so he decided to give someone a try. Mai. One of the team’s PR managers. She always was nice to rin, pretty, soft spoken, understanding, basically what most men would want. Fortunately for rin, she also seemed to harbor some sort of attraction towards him. Nothing serious at the moment but definitely something to start with. A few dates here and there. Hang outs at home and all. Mai was aware that rin couldn’t commit yet and neither was she. The arrangement they had worked for both. But boy, was timing a bitch to rin. Roughly 3 months into dating mai, rin was rendered frozen in place when he received a message from you.

You: Rin! I’ve been assigned to work near your home stadium. Did I get that right? idk if that’s what you call it but yeah. I just moved in yesterday. Want to meet up? :)

As rin was mindlessly staring and repeatedly reading your message, reo passed by and “accidentally” saw the message. “dude, who’s that? isn’t mai going to get jealous?” Rin snapped back into reality after realizing his friends had seen what was going on. Isagi looked as well and as he read the contact name, a bulb went up his head “oh wait isn’t that the girl you used to like before you started dating mai?” A few banters here and there about the team invading rin’s privacy, shidou chimed in out of nowhere “Know what? Why don’t you make a pros and cons list for the girls? I know damn well you still like that one but you also seem smitten as fuck for mai so.. pros and cons man” and most of the time, only bullshit comes out of shidou’s mouth but god, rin was at such a crossroads, he gave in. With the help of his teammates, a list was made.

Later that day, rin agreed to meet with you. It’s not that he had already decided or that he was confident you still had feelings for him but he thought it wouldn’t hurt. Besides, he had already asked mai about it and she was more than okay with it. She even half joked half meant said that if things work out between you and rin, she should at least be invited to the wedding. When rin arrived at the meet up place and he saw you sitting and looking around, there was no doubt in his heart. It was still you and he was a big fool for ever thinking that dating someone else would ever work. Not to deny that mai was a great girl and that they matched pretty well.. it’s just that you were it for him. At that moment, he thanked the heavens that his arrangement with mai wasn’t serious yet. He felt bad having to end or because the relationship had its fair share of ups but, god, seeing you again just locked him in and it would feel wrong dating anyone else when he was this crazy for you. Rin walked up to you and gently tapped your shoulder. You immediately looked back to see him and as if on instinct, you jumped up to hug him. “Rin! How have you been?!” You exclaimed while still hugging him. “Hello to you too, yn” he calmly replied back while hugging back, cradling your head gently in his hand.

The meet up went as well as you had hoped. Lots of catching up, rin touring you around, trying out different food places. It was a fun welcome to the city. In the evening, as rin was about to drive you home, he realized that he left his phone at the restaurant. “Sorry yn, can you wait a bit, I think I left my phone” you gave him a gentle nod as he left the car. You let out a heavy sigh because god were you nervous. You wanted to finally try it out with rin since you were close by and distance wouldn’t be an issue anymore. As you were thinking of ways to tell him what you wanted to do, a piece of paper with your name on it caught your attention. It was at the little compartment in between the driver’s seat and your seat. Not meaning to be nosy but also being extremely curious, you picked it up and unfolded. You were half expecting a cute note but you were met with a pros and cons list. Specifically the cons list which had “unstable” and “needs career” which you immediately interpreted as him conveying that you looked to have no stability and that you had a career he deemed insufficient to consider as a relevant enough career. And it hurt. It hurt because he was right. Compared to him, your career was small and you couldn’t exactly blame him but you didn’t think he’d see it as something bad enough to consider it a “con”. You didn’t even realize you were crying and you didn’t realize that rin had just opened the door to his seat. “Yn? Hey what’s the matter?” He sounded so worried and caring but that didn’t matter. “I- I’m taking a cab, rin I’m sorry” his eyes darted to the piece of paper in your grasp and his face fell pale. “yn listen, wait” he gently grabbed your wrist and you let him. “I know this looks bad. Fuck, it is bad. But it’s not what you think. I don’t think you’re unstable or any of that. It’s just.. what I’m trying to say is that you being busy with your career, we wouldn’t be stable is what I’m trying to say there. And that you wouldn’t want to pick anything over your career at the moment. I swear I just.. I’m not good with words please believe me. And the other girl on the list, I tried dating someone else but when I saw you today, everything just fell into place. I like you still, I know you know that. She knows it too” and he was telling the truth. It just wasn’t sinking into your head that he was saying that he wanted a relationship? The person you’ve loved since senior year of high school likes you back. You always had a guy feel but he never acted on it so you brushed it off but now he just confessed. “Let me make it up to you and all the years we missed?” Rin asked with a smile.

#blue lock x y/n #blue lock #rin itoshi #itoshi rin x reader #rin itoshi x reader #blue lock fluff #blue lock angst #itoshi rin fluff #itoshi rin angst #rin itoshi fluff #rin itoshi angst

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bewitchedme-body-and-soul · 10 months

Text

all sides of you

a/n: this came to me late at night and i had to write it; shout out to @humanalien01 for helping me and supporting my simping. idk how i feel abt the ending tbh :/

summary: a night at josies bar leads to you admitting your thoughts about the devil of hell's kitchen, and a few months later your words come back to haunt you.

word count:2427

warnings: swearing, canon typical violence, reader is victim in an attempted mugging & fights back, cursing, reader is called a bitch

Standing around the pool table at Josie's bar with the Nelson and Murdock team, playful banter spewn between the four of you. Each of you taking turns shooting while also trying to make the others mess up. The laughter coming from the four of you carrying throughout the bar, the three deserved this after a hard case, and you being Matt's partner were happily invited. Foggy happily uses you as a means to try to embarrass Matt with silly stories from their college years. You and Karen, doubling over in laughter as Foggy finishes his current story, Matt's cheeks tinted pink. Upon noticing you move closer to him, pressing a quick kiss against his cheek, then resting your head against his shoulder, his arm wrapping around your middle.

It's not until Foggy scoffs begrudgingly that your attention and Matts is pulled away to look at what Foggy's upset about. On one of the Tvs hanging around the bar you notice a news story about The Devil Of Hell's Kitchen. Foggy going on a rant about how he thought the man was bad news while you stared at the grainy footage someone caught of the man decked out in all black, as he beat up a group of gang members. You slowly zoned out as you watched how the man in the mask’s body contorted as he flipped and took the bad men out.

“Y/n!” Foggy's voice pulled you out of your daydream, your head snapping to look in his direction, giving him a hum in acknowledgement. “What do you think? What's your opinion on the masked man?” he asks, you know he's hoping you'll take his side.

Your cheeks tint a slight pink at the question, aware of the two pairs of eyes locked on you and Matt's head tilting, obviously also looking forward to your answer. “Um, i don't really have one” you lie, moving to lean over the pool table and shoot one of the balls. Karen's giggle goes in tandem with the clack of the cue ball hitting one of the stripped balls.

“You're lying!” Foggy calls out pointing an accusatory finger at you, “did you know lying is a sin? I can't believe you would do such a thing while dating our good Catholic Matt Murdock” he gasps a hand over his heart like you wounded him deeply with your tiny fib. The smile on Matt’s face tells you he did not care and he finds Foggy's dramatics hilarious.

“Oh no, however will you forgive me, my love?” you gasp dramatically leaning against Matt. “But seriously my opinion on the man in the mask isn't that important.” you say trying to move on.

Karen laughs before speaking “oh, trust me, too foggy it is very important, and honestly now I’m interested cause it's been just me vs foggy about this since Matt tries to stay out of these conversations” after she's done speaking the attention turns back to you. You sigh as Matt moves to take his turn, now seeing you have no way out of this conversation.

“I don't know, I don't think he has bad intentions or anything” you shrug before continuing “He’s also kinda hot” you say the second part quieter. The other three members of your party all have varying reactions, Karen laughing, Matt giving an awkward chuckle, and Foggy with his over the top dramatics acting as if you’ve insulted his mother. You watch Matt out of the corner of your eye worrying you may have upset him, you’d only been dating a month and a half, the relationship still new, you're still learning things about the other. What if you hurt him?

Foggy's voice pulls you out of your anxiety fueled downward spiral. “I can't believe you would do this to me” he speaks with a voice obviously trying to make you feel bad for not agreeing with him. He puts his head in his hand as he begins to fake cry. You and Karen look at each other before you both double over laughing, Matt joining in as Foggy's fake cries ramp up at your laughing.

You spend another few hours at Josies before you all decide to part ways, you going home with Matt after deciding to spend the night. Once you're in his apartment your anxiety returns from the prior conversation. You both make your way to his bedroom and change into clothes you can sleep in. It's only when you're both in bed, your head on his chest as he rubs your back, that you decide to broach the subject. “Hey Matty, can I ask you a question?” he hums in response. “Earlier at Josies, did I upset you?” you question, heart rate picking up slightly.

Matt feels your heart rate pick up so he quickly leans forward to kiss your forehead before he smiles at you with a soft chuckle, “no, not at all, I trust you, it’s no different than the people who have a crush on the avengers.” you sigh at his words. Anxiety subsiding, you know Matt well enough he wouldn’t lie to you about something like this. You nestle closer to him before grabbing his other hand and kissing his knuckles, ignoring the cracks and healed over abrasions. “Besides, I know I’m your favorite” he says and you don't need to look at him to know he's wearing that cocky grin of his.

You roll your eyes at him “i suppose” You tease him, no matter who came to you and professed their love, you knew you’d always choose Matt. You feel his chest vibrate under your cheek as he laughs. Eventually the two of you fall asleep in eachothers arms.

~~~

A month passes and you forget the aforementioned conversation ever happened. So many things happening that small moments get buried and forgotten about so easily. It's not till you're walking home one night that the conversation gets catapulted back to the forefront of your mind.

On your way home from a girl date with Karen you get yanked into an alley and thrown against one of the brick walls of a building. The bricks sharp and your head immediately begins to throb as your head smacks against it. A hand goes over your mouth and fight or flight takes over as you feel your heart rate pick up and the rush of adrenaline pumping through your veins. You struggle before biting down with all your might on the hand, the taste of copper coats your tongue. The man who grabbed you yanks his hand back and you spit the blood out onto his face before screaming, hoping you’d be lucky enough for someone to be close enough to hear you. You knew basic self defense but you’d rather be safe and hope someone would at least call emergency services.

“You bitch” the man yells before slapping you across the face. You bring your knee up in an attempt to connect it with his groin. His hand shoots down, your knee still connects but not with as much force as you hoped. As you attempt to shove him off you hear a thud to the side of you and you can only hope that it’s some good samaritan here to save you. It's only a few seconds later your attacker is yanked off of you and thrown to the ground.

You watch with bated breath as the man in the mask repeatedly punches the guy in the face and head. Once he finishes he makes his way over to you, you can hear him speaking to you, asking if you're alright, but you're distracted by the shape of his jaw and the way his lips move. A sense of familiarity washes over you and you're unsure as to why.

“I’m fine, thank you, I just need to get home.” You quickly rush out before speed walking away. Wanting to be in the safety of yours and Matt's home as quickly as possible, and wanting to scrub your mouth to rid it of the copper taste. A part of you hoping Matt is home so you can just crash into his arms and sleep.

You arrive home to an empty apartment, the billboard on the building across the alley lighting up the living room. You drop your jacket and bag on the counter before moving to the bathroom and brushing your teeth for far longer than the usual two minutes. Afterwards moving to your shared bedroom and changing into the clothes you'd be sleeping in.

As you're changing you spot a picture of you and Matt on top of your dresser. You pause, taking a moment to admire your partner, that's when it hits you. The sense of familiarity, why the bottom half of the devil of hell's kitchen face looked so familiar. You'd kissed those lips hundreds of times, it's no wonder your body recognized them. Everything begins falling into place in your head, like placing the last puzzle pieces in a puzzle and seeing the finale picture.

Matt's injuries always lined up with when you'd see the man in the mask on the new fighting bad guys. How a part of you always believed there was more to the story than him just falling or whatever excuse he’d give you. He was always so careful, far too careful to just take a tumble as often as he’d tell everyone. You never called him out cause even if a part of you believed he was lying you trusted him enough that you never questioned. Your thoughts are interrupted by the sound of the door opening and Matt's voice calling out for you.

“In the bedroom!” you call back, wondering if he’ll tell you or if you'd have to call him out and question him. You hear him approach and turn to look at him, he looks relatively unharmed, ‘that's good’ you think. “Hey baby.” you can't help the small smile that graces your features, he moves closer to where your voice came from, reaching a hand out towards you. Once he reaches you he wraps his arms around you pressing a kiss against the top of your head. You hear and feel him take a deep breath, you wouldn't be surprised if he was also a little shaken up, he’d just saved his partner from being mugged, you wouldn’t blame him if he was. The two of you sit in silence for a few minutes before you decide you can't take it anymore.

“Baby?” you begin, he hums in response. You take a deep breath before you continue, turning in his arms and wrapping your arms around his neck. “When were you gonna tell me?” you question, you figure it's best to just rip the bandaid off.

“Tell you what sweetheart?” he questions tilting his head, eyebrows furrowing. He looked like a puppy, confused by the trick its owner is trying to teach it. You understand why he’d try and play this off but you also wish he’d just be honest. Your face morphs into a deadpan expression.

“Matty, seriously, you know what I’m talking about.” You cross your arms over your chest. “When were you going to tell me youre daredevil?” you question. He huffs out a small laugh.

“What? Honey what are you talking about? I’m not the daredevil.” he lies through his teeth.

“I know you can’t see my face but just know it's a look of disappointment cause you should really be better at lying if you're gonna be a vigilante.” you speak before moving just out of matts reach. Deciding he could touch you again when he confessed. A defeated sigh leaves him, you assume he's come to the conclusion that there’s no way of getting out of this without being honest.

“I don't know, honestly.” he begins “I always wanted to tell you, I hated lying to you, especially after seeing how worried you’d get.” he takes his glasses off sitting them on your dresser. “I was waiting for the right moment I guess. I was worried how you’d react, I didn’t want to lose you.” he finishes looking in your direction. He looks like a puppy that just got scolded and was trying to look cute to get out of punishment.

“First of all, low blow, you know your puppy eyes work way too well on me” you speak trying not to giggle. “Second, Matt I’m literally so in love with you, it’d take a lot more than you running around at night in a mask beating up criminals to lose me.” Now the laugh escapes you, a smile making its way to his face as well at your laugh. He moves closer to you again, hands landing on your waist, before he leans in to kiss you.

“You handled this a lot better than Foggy did,” he laughs. “Also, if you were wondering, yes, i am actually blind”

“I wasn’t, but good to know.” you laugh “and to be fair, foggy did hate your alter ego.” you lean up to kiss his cheek, “lets go to bed baby” you whisper before crawling into your shared bed as he moves to change into pajamas. Once he joins you in the bed you snuggle into his arms, resting your head over his heart. Thinking over everything as you trace shapes against his chest, it’s then you sit up quickly realizing something. “You little shit!” you yell with a laugh as you playfully hit him in the chest.

“What? What’d I do?” he asks shock and confusion taking his features

“A few months ago, at Josies with Foggy and Karen” you begin, you can tell by the look his face morphs to that he's beginning to understand. His cocky smile finding his face again. “I confessed that I thought the daredevil was hot and you just let me?” you ask incredulously “no wonder you were so unphased by it” you playfully shove his shoulder

“Would it help if I said I found it very flattering that you did?” he laughed “but seriously, that was when I started seriously thinking about telling you. It made me feel a little bit better about it.” he speaks, moving his hand to rub against your knee.

“Maybe, it does a little,” you confess. “You're still a little shit though.” you laugh moving to kiss him. “My little shit though” you whisper. The rest of the night is spent full of soft touches and laughter as the two of you bask in your love of the other.

#they have bewitched me #daredevil x reader #daredevil imagine #matt murdock #matt murdock x reader #matt murdock imagine #matt murdock fluff #matt murdock x you #matt murdock x y/n #matt murdock x original character #matt murdock x oc

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judysxnd · 8 months

Text

Proofs that Pedro Pascal & Y/n Y/l/n are dating, (part 4)

I didn’t know you wanted more of those! Someone left a comment they wanted to have more of those so, you asked and you shall receive! (Idk how to answer to someone when it’s a repost, so I didn’t answer, sorry!) I sound like an old person 😂

I struggle a little to keep a good schedule when it comes to writings, because I was very focused on doing the requests more than writing my own ideas.

Also I think I didn’t really keep doing them because it was becoming the same things, like I don’t have a lot of imagination when it comes to going out and stuff. It was always going to a coffee shop, simple tasks (it shows how bad my life is)

I think this one will be related to the request I got about Pedro x reader on a beach vacation. I will follow that one. The dates here are the same ones of my beach vacation. I follow reality too much!! Ok byyyyye

———————————————————————————

21.08.2023, at 1:07pm

Y/n posted an Instagram story of her in the car, and then she showed Pedro driving, but more dancing behind the wheel. They had music playing rather loudly. She captioned “6th hours on the road but it’s going pretty good”. They seemed to be headed somewhere together, somewhere far, or they had traffic. We can’t know for sure. But we missed seeing them together!

22.08.2023, during the day

They were seen multiple times walking around in a small city, which yes is far away from where they are usually seen. They were also spotted eating at a restaurant. It looks like they are on a vacation. But.. friendly vacation? Hm, to be continued..

23.08.2023, around 4pm

Pedro and Y/n were seen at a beach. They seemed to be there alone together, no one else with them. They were in a spot where there weren’t many people, but they were still spotted. Not like they were trying to hide. Pedro stayed a lot in the water, Y/n eventually joined him. She seemed a little scared but the movement of the waves, so she stayed ver closed to Pedro, holding his arms. At some point they got out of the water, laying on their towels. This is where we suspect they are together because as they were both laying on their stomach, Pedro kept his arm around Y/n’s waist. We think they were about to kiss but a fan interrupted them, asking for a picture. So close!!!!

25.08.2023, around 10am

Two days later they were seen in a port going on a small boat together. A romantic little trip? A fan from afar posted a video of Pedro helping Y/n climbing by holding her hand when then to help steady her, putting his hands on her waist. The fan filming was ecstatic! They seemed to be on this vacation just together, it really seems like it’s romantic! But when are we going to get an official statement?

26.08.2023, at 9:13am

Pedro posted a few pictures of his vacation. The beach, a video of Y/n falling because of a big wave, the port, a picture of the two of them that she took on the boat and some food. It’s giving boyfriend vibes. But.. he. did. not. caption. anything. Especially since the picture of them together on the boat is Y/n, on her knees on a couch, Pedro in front of her sitting normally, and her having her arms around his neck. We may not get anything, but still, we’re happy they’re having a good time. They seem genuinely happy.

(Y/n reposted the post on her story, choosing the picture of them together, and she just put a heart. They are driving us crazy!!!!)

27.08.2023, at 8:36am

Y/n posted a video on her story that was actually taken by Pedro. They were in the car again, this time Y/n was driving, still music in the background. At first we can see them and then Pedro turned the camera to show the view. The ocean, a beautiful blue sky a bridge at some point. It seems like they were leaving. There was a caption “one week is too short 🥺”, yeah they’re definitely leaving. She identified Pedro on it this time.

#pedro pascal #fanfic #imagine #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro pascal x reader #oneshot #pedro pascal imagine #pedro pascal preferences #pedro pascal x y/n #pedro pascal x you #pedro pascal fic #pedro pascal x female reader #pedro x reader #pedrostories #pedro pascal one shot #pedro pascal fanfic #pedro pascal fluff #pedro pascal x famous!reader

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joels-shitty-puns · 8 months

Text

The Key To Your Heart - Track 2

Pairing: Pedro Pascal x Musician!Reader

Series Summary: After writing your feelings for Pedro into a song, it gains a lot more popularity than expected. Ultimately it brings both criticism and support, with new possibilities around the corner.

Series Warnings: 18+ only (MDNI). Potential for puns/dad jokes (name of my blog, and the fic) should give that away. This is my first fic which should be its own warning, lol. Also some cursing. Mentions of masturbation (f) maybe more smut later idk. Sadness, reader is pretty depressed. Poor body image. Rude people. Bullying-ish and just lack of support? Anxiety. Age gap! Reader is in her mid 20's, Pedro is current age (48).

Other stuff: Reader is plus sized. AFAB. Inexperienced. Also has a dog, but you can pretend it is another creature probably. Further, in case it isn't clear, italics almost always are the reader's inner thoughts!

Word Count: 2.8K

Series List: Here!

Miss last chapter? Here!

I had a real rough time figuring out the proper voice for Pedro's dialogue and I hope I did him justice. Either way, the support I received for part 1 is astounding and completely unexpected! Thank you all for reading and let me know what you think :) I plan to continue until the story wraps up, but I don't know how many parts that will be. I hope to post every couple days, but with my work schedule it may be less speedy. Here we go!

You walk in the door, unclipping Skip's leash, slipping off your shoes, and dropping your keys on the countertop before flopping onto the couch and unlocking your phone. No. Fucking. Way.

Pedro Pascal (pascalispunk) replied to your message.

You dissected each letter of the username, assuming it couldn't possibly be THE Pedro Pascal… but it was. It really, really was. You clicked the message, holding your breath.

Pedro Pascal replied to you: "Hey, you don't need to thank me. I didn't say anything that wasn't true. That guy was out of line. You deserve happiness and I'm sorry for the harsh words you've been hearing. I appreciate you sharing your vulnerability with the world and hope that you will continue to be your genuine self and ignore the comments trying to make you be someone else. Don't listen to those people."

You stared in disbelief at his words, once again wondering why he would ever be so kind to someone he doesn't even know. Someone so childish and stupid to write a song about a man she doesn't know. I can't imagine he'd think these things if he knew it was about him…

You: "Thank you Mr. Pascal. I'm a big fan of yours and hearing that you're in my corner has me completely at a loss. I can't imagine why you would risk damaging your image by defending a girl…" No… don't say girl, it makes you sound like a child. You want this guy to like you! You backspace with a slight feeling of ridiculousness over the whole scenario. Ugh it's all wrong… calm down... calm down… it's just a conversation. He doesn't know you. He doesn't like you. Don't make it weird like you always do.

You try again.

You: "Thank you Mr. Pascal. I really admire your work and for you to say such kind things to me… to think that you're in my corner, has me completely at a loss for words. I don't know what I did to deserve this treatment when you don't even know me, especially when coming to my defense could potentially harm your image… but thank you."

He read it almost immediately. Your heart was beating out of your chest and you felt like you could throw up from the anxiety and adrenaline. After a few seconds, those stress-inducing dot-dot-dots appeared to show you he was typing.

He's actually replying to me?? Again? Doesn't he have better things to do?

Your mind wandered to what he might be doing while he's messaging you. Sitting at his home, relaxing, taking the time to reply to you? Why? Maybe he's on a plane or waiting for something and killing time. Maybe he's- *ping*

Pedro Pascal replied to your message:

"Please, you can call me Pedro.. and as far as defending you, it doesn't matter to me that we don't know each other personally. You seem like a woman with a good heart, and all you did was share your true self. Nobody deserves to be talked poorly about for something harmless that they feel. If something like that hurts my image… then my true self wasn't being represented. I think we all just want to be seen, and I hope that you will feel comfortable to be yourself and show yourself more."

You don't know when you started crying, but you hiccupped with the overwhelming wave of emotions. He sees me.. you had just scrolled to the bottom of the long reply, when you noticed the "..." of typing again. He has more to say?!

Pedro Pascal: "As far as the subject of your song.. whether you choose to reveal that to him, or the world, you deserve love and respect. Being vulnerable and putting yourself out there is a terrifying thing to do, and I myself tend to close myself off from relationships to avoid that potential for getting hurt. But if that's what you want, you've already taken a big step and you should go for it. I hope that whoever he is gives you the respect and love you deserve."

Holy crap…

He doesn't… he doesn't know it's him right?? No. There's no way. He's just being nice… he's too nice. He's too genuine..??

Your thumbs hover over the keyboard, doing a little dance in the air, pondering what to say. How much can I share with this man? Between this crush and his kind words, it's feeling tricky to hold back from spilling too much information.

You: "Thank you Pedro. You're too kind and I can't properly explain how much I really appreciate it. I'm having trouble coming to terms with all the sudden attention, and finding it hard to ground myself. But your words are helping me a lot. I - "

You hesitated over your next words, wondering if you should open up or just leave it. Don't be weird… don't scare him away like you always have with everyone else. As much as you think of disclosing your hesitation and lack of experience with relationships, as well as your reasons for trepidation, you decide to spare him of your self-hatred. Instead, you delete that last letter and hit send.

Then you send another message, like he did. "And as far as the guy… I know I don't know him personally, we've never met, but I can already tell he would treat me right. I just hope maybe someday he will love me back."

Immediately after sending it you regretted it. That felt way too open and vulnerable. What are you thinking!?! Shit… what if he sees through you!?

You hold your finger down on the message, ready to hit unsend before he sees it. But it's too late. He's already replying.

Pedro: "He would be stupid not to love you back."

What the fuck what the fuck what the fuck

You: "Thank you, Pedro. 🥺" Play it cool… Play it cool…

Pedro: "Of course, sweetheart. Feel free to message me if anyone else gives you trouble or you just want to chat. I enjoyed talking with you."

???!!!!!?????!!!!! SweetheartSweetheartSweetheart

You grabbed your nearest pillow and screamed into it. "SKIPPPPPEERRRRRRR!!!!!! I JUST HAD A CONVERSATION WITH PEDRO AND IT WAS MAGICAL AND AAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!" You squealed.

Skipper lifted his head at you and sighed before setting his head back down. He was no stranger to your shenanigans. Napping after a good walk was a better use of his energy than to deal with your drama. He closed his little brown eyes again.

You lay back on the couch, kicking your feet and squeezing your pillow to your body.

Fuck, this is going to hit me like a truck if it goes sour. If he even realizes it's about him, probably. Crap… what am I going to do?

The next day, you woke up and checked your emails before work. Thankfully nobody at your workplace has seemed to place your singing voice to your speaking voice, or pieced together the fact that several people know you have a crush on a certain celebrity and are a musician. Thank goodness. That’s the last thing you need.

You closed your eyes for a few minutes, trying to calm your breathing, your nerves, and your heart rate, before relaxing and shaking out your body. Finally, you decided to get ready for bed and see what tomorrow brings.

Your emails come in, one by one, with one intriguing email at the top, from a well known pop-culture show called The Jazz & Ally-Kat Show. They want to do an interview with you, live, as soon as possible.

Great. They probably just want to see what I look like or have me spill my guts about my crush. You roll your eyes, and you can’t help but feel like the Mandalorian with his lack of face reveals. If only you had a cute little space baby to accompany you. I guess Skip is my own precious cargo in a way, you think, while looking at your still sleeping pup. You're being silly… Not everything needs to relate back to Pedro, you think with a sigh to yourself.

Yet despite your anxiety, you agreed to their interview, with the exception that it was done as a podcast style interview, where simply your voices are featured. Surprisingly, they agreed. I guess everyone likes some drama, and what better way to get views than by having a little mystery.

The interview was scheduled for three days from then, and in the meantime you focused on work and your album, which was mostly finished after years of writing songs. All it needed was some editing.

As the days went by, you wanted desperately to message Pedro again. You wanted to tell him your feelings. Have him confess that he loves you too. Ask him about his family, his friends, his favorite things. Meet him, kiss him, fall in love, and finally be happy. But ultimately you knew that was silly. You had one little conversation, and although it was nice, you still didn't know each other. There was no way he loved you back. Yet…? you asked yourself, hopeful, almost asking for permission to let yourself try and earn his love.

Despite Instagram drawing you in like a magnet, you held back from messaging him. You didn't want to come on too strong. You messaged him first last time. He doesn't know you. Literally… he doesn't even know your real name, or what you look like. But maybe that's a good thing…

_____The day of the interview:_____

You woke up around 9:30 in the morning; nervous, slightly nauseated, restless, and jittery. Why did I agree to this??!

You decided to pass on the coffee this morning, figuring it would make things worse, and instead decided to take Skipper for a walk. After some fresh air followed by a refreshing shower, you looked at the clock. 11:30 AM. With the interview at 1PM, you still had some time to kill and sat down at the piano, letting your mind wander to Pedro while you plunked chords out with nimble fingers. I wonder if Pedro has ever wanted to learn any instruments… I could teach him, you daydream.

Your hands dance across the piano while he reads through a script in the other room, eyebrows furrowed as he highlights another line. You look up over the grand piano and see his soft brown curls blowing under the fan haphazardly. The sun is shining in through the window, which Skip bathes under, and reflects a golden brown undertone with gray streaks in Pedro's hair. He really is beautiful, you think. His tongue swipes across his lips as he makes notes and erases, before finally feeling your eyes on him. He glances up from the script, giving you a soft smile and a wink; with those chocolate brown eyes that frequently cause you to lose your train of thought. Your eyes drift down to the keys again, feeling a soft blush creep over your cheeks.

"That music sounds beautiful, baby.." he says softly while padding up to you behind the piano. He places his large hands on your shoulders, sweeping them down over both your arms before settling on your hands, still resting over the black and white keys. You look over your shoulder and he leans in, closing his eyes as he presses a gentle kiss to your lips. Just like that scene in Narcos… you think. Yikes, I really am obsessed… anyway… you think back to your daydream…

He sits down at the chair next to your piano bench, kissing your lips again gently, then the corner of your mouth, your cheek, and your jaw. Your stomach gives a wave of butterflies and you lean in more to kiss him deeper, tugging on his hair while his hands find the small of your back, gently running his palms up your spine. A chill overcomes you and he-

~Beep beep. Beep beep. Beep beep.~

Fuck. You snap out of your fantasy and turn off the alarm you set to go off ten minutes before the interview. At least I gave myself time to use the restroom and wash my face, you think, hoping to clear your head a bit now that you're slightly frazzled.

Unfortunately the feeling that replaced it was nerves as you sat down at your desk, typing into your keyboard, turning on your mic, and hoping that Skipper doesn't throw a fit over the wind or something while you're on this call.

Jazz: "Hi there listeners! We're joined by the artist of the moment, our favorite lovesick lady, the singer responsible for "Imaginary Love!"

Both women on the other end of the call applaud.

Well… not sure I like being called a lovesick lady but what else did I expect, really?

You: "Thank you guys for having me, I appreciate you wanting to get to know me better."

Despite the rough start, the ladies turned out to be really respectful and fun. You think that if the circumstances were different, you could actually be friends with them. You discuss casual things like your dog, your favorite activities and favorite pop culture topics (careful to avoid mentioning Pedro or any other actor that could be perceived as your lyrical subject), and they even mention celebrity crushes they've had growing up.

At the mention of their celebrity crushes, you can feel the interview funnel into a dangerous alley with little to no escape. Jazz was the first to broach the subject. "So… we've just discussed our celebrity crushes, and I think I speak for all of us here when I say we're all very curious to know who-"

-an air horn blares-

What the hell is that? You wonder, both thankful for the interruption, yet startled by the disruption.

They both chime in: "Viewers!!! Do you all know what that sound is!?! We have reached 1 million listeners!!!!"

To say you were astounded is an understatement.

You: "You're kidding!? 1 million people are listening to us right now?"

Ally: "You bet they are! And listeners… I don't know about you guys… but I can't help but wonder if our celebrity heartthrob is one of those million?"

They turn their attention to you again. "What do you think? Think he's listening?"

You're thankful for the lack of a camera, because you can't help but blush at the thought. You'd be lying if you hadn't already considered (hoped) that he was listening too.

Jazz: "So as we were saying… I think we all are in agreement that we want to know who he is. You sound like a nice enough girl, so what's holding you back? You've made it. You can contact him now and he'll probably reply."

I already have… you thought with a smirk.

Jazz continues: "Which brings me to the next point... I know you've had a lot of attention lately. You were signed to a record company, you were contacted by us, you've been mentioned by a few talk shows and celebrities. Pedro Pascal even publicly defended you. The radio has been playing your song nonstop and people can't get enough. What do you think of all this attention?"

You: "I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a bit surprised and maybe a little scared," you answered with a nervous laugh. "But I am so thankful for the kind words that I receive and I love hearing from people who can relate to my music."

Ally: "You've certainly received your fair share of criticism too. It sounds like you received that before your song was ever published as well."

You: "I have, and it's been challenging to try and not let it get me down. But I'm trying my best, and the positives seem to be greatly outweighing the negatives," you state, your mind thinking of Pedro and how his messages were really the only positive you needed to get you through the dark storm of criticism.

Ally: "I guess what I'm wondering is.. among all these people contacting you.. has he?"

You try to play dumb: "Has who?"

Both interviewers laugh before Ally continues. "Nice try. You know who we're trying to find out about. Has he, the man of your dreams and star of your lyrics, contacted you at all? Will we see a romance blooming?"

Your stomach flipped. You were not expecting this question. Should you tell the truth??? It's not like they could know who has contacted you, short of hacking your account. You have had a lot of people contact you, after all.

You take a deep breath before answering. "I uh… I have received a lot of messages, some of them from celebrities."

They reply, and you can practically feel them leaning in. "Yeeeeaaaah?????"

You consider your next move, your heart really working overtime since this whole thing started. Finally you decide your answer.

"Yes. We've talked."

Looking for Track 1? Read it here!

Next chapter: Here!

~Thanks for reading! Stay ~tuned~ for more!

Taglist: Let me know if you want in :)

@pedrotonin @starcrossed02

#pedro pascal #pedro pascal fanfic #pedro pascal x you #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro pascal smut #pedro pascal x afab!reader #pedro pascal x y/n #pedro pascal x musician!reader #pedro pascal fluff #pedro pascal x plus sized! reader #pedro pascal fic #A! wrote a fic #rpf #pedro pascal rpf #key to your heart

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9w1ft · 20 days

Text

fam…. wow, what a year.

in the summer, i went to karlie’s birthday show, and on the way back i stopped through santa monica and pacific palisades just to soak in the rich kid ambiance, and well, no, actually, i wanted to check out jennifer meyer! because, well, idk. inspiration struck. it’s such a fun kaylorverse brand! and i thought, if enamored enough, i might be convinced into buying a tiny heart ring or charm or something, but they had just gotten in one of something recently and when i saw it i immediately knew i would be talked into it.

…so i picked up this tiny necklace from jen meyer. for obvious reasons.. i couldn’t help it! it spoke to me!!

fast forward to a handful of weeks later and taylor is… wearing evil eye jewelry! several pieces! more than several pieces!! even an evil eye stud!! and i come to deduce later on that the first time she wore the bracelet was the day before karlie’s birthday concert. which is a true coincidence that i love, because, it’s the day @taylorrepdetective and i happened to arrive in LA. and so today, reflecting on the eye theory as i do, i was thinking today about how my life changed shape, because of all of these things.

for april 18th is, as you may know, eye theory day! the day @swift-79 and i finalized and i posted the og eye theory post, back in 2019. also known as the eyepocalypse, discovereye, the start of many things.

today marks the four five year anniversary. it’s pretty wild that we’re still kickin it five years in! and it’s become a sort of tradition for me where i like to post a little something personal in honor of the day. so allow me to continue this one gratis.

second part of my story is that a little over a year ago now, i went to opening night of the eras tour with @theprologues and the day after the concert, on my way back, i stopped through scottsdale and walked through all the boutique shops and souvenir shops and picked up a trinket. a ring that called out to me, for…obvious reasons.

i mean, how could i not?? to commemorate a wonderful trip to meet a dear friend, and for all the eye theory things that happened on opening night!

and it’s been a year since then and i’m one of those people that just doesn’t take jewelry off, so it’s been on my finger for all this time. it was a snug fit, and silver, so it both wasn’t coming off easily and wouldn’t be leaving a green ring on my hand or anything, so i have kept it there. for a little over a year now.

but the other day someone was asking me about it. and i was like oh, i got this in arizona and so i went to adjust it to show it off because the center stone was off to the side and when i twisted it i noticed a mark on my finger, an indent, for having worn it so long.. and i sorta laughed to myself because, you know, there is an indentation. in the shape of an eye.

so i decided to take the thing off for a sec and let my finger breathe and so i take off the ring and notice— the shape of the ring has changed.

what once was centered, has now fully to morphed and warped the right side. 🙈🙈 c’est la vie.

i only write this out to say that, it had me thinking. about all the fun we had for this fourth turn around the theory, all the dear friends i have met, all the tour outfits, the accessories and merch?!… all of the little connections we have made over this… thing 😆 it had me thinking about how there are always going to be these fun little moments in life where the universe winks at you and, and how if you can manage it, it’s a charmed way to live, really. reminded me of the time i lost karlie’s gem on my swarovski evil eye bracelet at rep tour tokyo! that is to say, when the going gets tough, it can still be fun. if you work to give yourself permission. as one might say…there are cathedrals everywhere for those with the eyes to see 🥴

it didn’t really occur to me until this week just how close the release date is to the eye theory anniversareye ☺️ and i’m not sure what this countdown is for but it’s running out so close to when the op was posted five years ago so i decided to post around now :) not to say any of it was anything more than accidental. but hey, laughter is the best medicine, is it not?

so omnom, i say! omnom!

and so today, on ts11 album release eve,

i implore all of you (and myself) to open our hearts juuust a crack,

and keep on the lookout for the gold nuggets that are going to be there. assume taylor will perjure herself a bit during this trial, relax, allow yourself the enjoy what we get, like nobody else truly can.

and so eye enter into evidence…

literally a bajillion things let’s be real like oh my god

our tarnished post of eyes, my indentations, shaped like…occulations,

our talismans and charms.

the tap, tap, tap of me selecting bert memes, my veins of bloodshot pink.

all’s fair in love and…

poetreye.

#all eyes on us #happy anniversareye 🫶

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tmntxthings · 2 months

Note

hiii could i request some headcanons for a touch starved!casey jr with a reader who their love language is physical touch [romantic/fluff]? idk i just want to give to my baby a hug, he deserves so much better😭

一∑ Tender Connections

author’s note: i agree this boi needs all the hugs c:

warnings: fluff, hurt/comfort themes, touchstarved!casey jr. x gn reader, unedited

—————————————————————————

Ever since Kraang was defeated Casey never stopped training. It was ingrained in him since birth that he always needed to be ready for the next catastrophe.

But those were few and far between even with the weird magnet company of the turtles + April! Despite everyone’s attempts at wanting to show Casey the new world he was now in, he would go back to the lair and train until he was sore.

One time Leo tried to keep him out all night which was quite possible in New York since the city never slept. There was an endless amount of possibilities to get into some fun and maybe a little mischief if it involved the blue turtle.

But Casey’s stamina and resilience was equivalent if not better than all of the turtles due to his upbringing. He wouldn’t have survived the apocalypse otherwise. So when Leo finally portaled them back to the lair, barely having enough energy to do so without passing out seconds later, he didn’t get to see Casey’s knowing smile.

The boy from the future easily picked up his younger sensei and got him to bed. Then it was off to the dojo, where he continued to stay up until he felt like he had gotten a good enough training session in. What he wasn’t expecting, was you to be leaning against the circular doorway.

“You know, you may have the worst sleeping habits out of all of them if Leo’s passed out.” You quipped and Casey could only offer a shy smile as he picked up the last of the equipment he had used. “I told him it wouldn’t work… to be fair” Casey muttered.

You didn’t know what to say. Things like, “Kraang is defeated now! And we can’t take some time to relax” didn’t really compute with Casey even if he agreed. His body just was wired a certain way and he didn’t know if it would ever relax. Even now his muscles which were exceedingly sore, ached for a different reason. He felt restless. He didn’t want to sleep. He felt like fighting. He felt like defending and protecting the city from some new unknown source of danger that was surely building up its forces now

Thoughts like these were driving him crazy. And you could see it. “Why don’t we go out?” You asked and watched as his mouth dropped open, about to refute that such methods didn’t work as Leo had literally just tried all evening to wear him down.

But you stopped him before he could refuse. “Just to a rooftop! It’ll only be a few minutes,” and how could he deny you? As he took you in, it was obvious that you had forced yourself to stay up. Had you been waiting for them to get back? You were in comfy pjs and your hair was a bit disheveled from what he could only guess was tossing and turning in bed. “Alright,” he sighed, shaking his head but continued to follow a step behind with a slight grin.

It was nice to know how much you cared. How much everyone cared about him! But something about you in particular made him feel a tad warmer.

So up to a rooftop you went. The sky was dark and there were blinking satellites that mimicked stars. The city still alive and thriving just as he had left it, but the rooftop was calmer than the sidewalks. It was quieter. He didn’t know if that was a good thing for a person like him. The quiet invited in thoughts that he’d rather not think about. Like his endless worries and paranoia.

He had been sitting on the low rise ledge that bordered the entire rooftop. One foot started to tap anxiously just to offer any kind of distraction when you had sat down next to him, carefully since past the ledge was a seven story drop to pavement. Your proximity eased those nerves somehow and with knees almost knocking, you faced Casey and started talking

About anything and everything! About yourself and your hopes and dreams. You asked about his now that he was here and didn’t have to live day by day. Talking like that made it sound like the future wasn’t always in peril. As if maybe he would have enough time to do other things, like try every restaurant in NYC. And travel outside of the city, even New Jersey which he still didn’t understand why the guys all disliked the place.

The conversation ebbed and flowed naturally until silence overtook once more and this time Casey didn’t have the overwhelming urge to distract himself. Instead he just took a deep breath in and out, letting it go in a long sigh. Then his breath caught in his throat because he hadn’t realized how close the two of you had gotten while talking. Your hand finding his in that moment and your fingers intertwining with his as if it was the most natural thing in the world.

He couldn’t stop himself from looking down at your connected hands, and he shivered all over as you started to trace patterns on the back of his hand. The pressure he had unknowingly been carrying around released from his shoulders. His eyes darted up to yours, finding that you were already there, waiting for his gaze.

In the moonlight he tried to convey his gratitude, because what could he say in this moment that wouldn’t ruin it? He squeezed your hand, comforted by the pressure. Grounded by the gentle hold that you had on him.

The two of you stayed like that for a while. Until your eyelids started to flutter and your body couldn’t stay upright. He of course more than welcomed you to lean on him, but he didn’t want to push his luck and didn’t want to keep you awake any longer when it was obvious both of you needed sleep. “C’mon,” Casey spoke softly, rousing you to try and get you to stand.

But it seemed you were either already out of your wits or maybe just trusted him wholeheartedly because you only scooted closer to him, allowing him to pick you up in his arms and carrying you back down to your bed. Which of course was done easily enough by him since he always had his grappling hook at the ready. It all ended quite too soon for his liking as he carefully let you go so you could snuggle under your covers, rasping out a goodnight to him with your eyes closed.

Would it be horrible of him to admit he had wanted to kiss your forehead so badly in that moment?

After that night, Casey was in for much more than handholding. While that still happened often, hugs became second nature between the two of you. He reveled in your hold, a days worth of stress releasing as soon as your arms encircled around him. Your hands at his back, going up and down in soothing strokes had him holding on tighter when it was time to let go. “Just a little longer?”

He’d shyly ask. If you didn’t want to he would immediately let go. But you always indulged him with a bright smile. So don’t get too mad when he starts to become greedy! With this revelation of him wanting and seeking out your gentle touch, he’d pull you into quiet corners like a true ninja.

One second you’d be in the middle of a Mario kart game and as soon as it was over you found yourself being tugged up and away because Casey had a really important thing to show you or a question that only you could answer! It got more and more ridiculous until Mikey called the both of you out and said you didn’t have to sneak around to hug!

Once PDA was on the table Casey never looked back. He was stuck to your side and honestly, you wouldn’t rather it any other way! <3

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221bshrlocked · 2 years

Text

where it wasn’t

Pairing: Obi-Wan Kenobi/Ben x Fem!Reader (post-Kenobi Series era)

Words: 18,763 (can you tell I’m unwell?)

Warnings: 18+ only. Angsty Smut. Mutual Pining/Porn with some plot. Touch-Starved Obi-Wan. Lots of Kissing. Some form of competency kink? Marking Kink (again idk). Dirty/Sweet Talk. Slight Choking. Overstimulation. Penetrative, Unprotected Sex. Slight Breeding Kink. Some tears here and there because Obi-Wan just needs a fucking hug.

Summary: “I- I am most flattered by your a-admiration but-” Ben grunts when you accidentally graze one of his nipples, his mind instantly going into hyperdrive and making him lose his train of thoughts. “But I highly doubt this is the most impressive form you’ve ever come across.” His voice is strained, that you’re certain of, and you want to see how far you can take it with him before he can no longer hold back. You’re close to thinking against it, but as you continue to knead his tight muscles, you notice a dark blush creeping down his neck to his chest and decide to tease him just a little bit more.

A/N: Yes, it is a massage au. Yes, the trope is basic as fuck. Yes, this fic is just an excuse to write porn. Yes, it is very much a self-indulgent story because I deal with trauma by reading or writing angsty smut. No, I am not okay after this week’s episode. This is completely inspired by the scene in episode 4 though...you know, the bacta tank one. Please don’t judge me. Enjoy and please be kind in the comments. I have never written for our beloved General before. Also, this is not beta’d...

He should not be here, it was neither safe nor necessary. But the bit of him that longed for another’s touch, a stranger’s kindness if you will, forced him to come out of his shell and go out of his way to come here again. He would regret it later of course, and the guilt would last for weeks before he no longer felt traces of her touch on his skin. Only then would he reevaluate his decisions and come to the conclusion that perhaps it was not as selfish or as dangerous as he deemed it to be.

An obnoxious string of laughter snaps him out of his haze, and he rubs his palms together to familiarize himself with the calmness he once walked hand-in-hand with. Pushing the hood higher upon his head, he crosses his arms together and approaches the dingy doors of the establishment he’s grown to seek out ever since he returned to Tatooine once more. A lump of anxiety forms in his dry throat all of a sudden and he barely manages to swallow it down as he enters the rather quiet building.

As soon as he steps past the threshold of the dimly lit entrance, he’s bombarded with a variety of scents, ones which he prayed to the Maker he would get to memorize again. He looks around as if this is his first time requesting the services the establishment offers, hoping that someone could put him out of his misery and recognize how difficult it was for him to come here. When he sees several others waiting to be led into one of the private rooms, he takes a deep breath and slowly moves towards one of the corners of the room.

However, before he has a chance to muster up the courage to ask when the next available appointment is, he hears his name uttered softly from behind him. He reluctantly turns around and feels his chest collapse at the sight of you. The weeks may have taken a toll on him, but the absence of your eyes pushed him to grow more fond of you than the last time he was here. He parts his lips to say something but the words die in his throat when he allows his focus to trail down your form. Somehow, you looked more mesmerizing in the old fabrics hugging your body than anyone ever had the right to. He cannot remember the last time he was so starstruck by the mere presence of another, but as he stands here, looking at you as if you were the rarest of flowers on this desert planet, he can’t help himself from smiling at you and bowing his head.

“I thought I would never see you again.” Your voice pulls him from the trance he’s under, and he walks towards you slowly, his hands remaining steadfast at his sides to remind himself that he cannot reach for you no matter how much he needs to.

“I- I hate to admit this, dear one, but I did not think you would ever see me again either.” Were it not for the hesitation veiling his words, you would have grown more offended at the rather sudden and somewhat rude exclamation. Neither of you say anything for a few moments though, and it’s only when you smile and look at your feet that he finally takes those last few steps towards you. Ringing your fingers nervously, you clear your throat and turn your attention to his light blue ones again, wishing you could find some bit of honesty that would let you know he missed you as much as you missed him.

“I see. Well, if you’re looking for someone else’s services, I will gladly recommend one or two that-” You try to change the subject but he cuts you off abruptly, and reaches out to rest his hand on your shoulder.

“No, please no.” When he sees the way you flinch at the touch of his hand, the subtle smirk gracing his handsome features drops and turns into an even more beautiful pout.

“My apologies, it was never my intention to make you uncomfortable.” It’s his turn to play with his hands to distract himself, and it takes you longer than necessary to put yourself together and not think of how large and firm his hand felt atop your skin.

“You never make me uncomfortable, Ben. In fact, you’re the only client I have that makes me look forward to coming into work every day.” It’s a longshot, that you are certain of, but the slight widening of his eyes and the way his shoulders tense let you know that, although he didn’t expect you to be so forthright with him after such a long time of not seeing or speaking together, he wasn’t opposed to the true meaning behind your words.

“You- you flatter me with your kind words.” He can’t bear to hold your gaze, afraid that if he looks for too long, you’d come to realize why he was so desperate to see you again. Some part of him longed to tell you how much cared for you ever since that first time you invited him into the parlor to ease his aches, but he knew there would be no going back once you were aware of the hidden thoughts and rather inappropriate dreams which plagued him for weeks on end.

“Not at all. Flattering implies I don’t mean what I’m saying. I’m just being honest Ben, and- well, I hope you can see that because…” You trail off when you notice him actively avoiding your eyes, and as you’re about to apologize for being too forward, a rather impatient trandoshan struts by and bumps into you on his way out. You trip and fall right into Ben’s arms, but before you can turn around and give the customer a piece of your mind, you hear Ben grunt in pain as he readjusts his hold on your waist.

“Oh Ben, you didn’t tell me you’re hurt!” You let go of him and step away, quickly trailing your eyes down his form to try and figure out where exactly he was wounded. He always wore those ripped, dirty clothes that hid him from prying eyes, and you wished he could finally be comfortable enough with you to allow you to give him a massage without his clothes. You got the sense early on that he was a man who relied on staying hidden, both physically and emotionally, so the idea of him stripping for you set your mind into overdrive. But as you stare at the pained expression on his tired features, you shake your thoughts away and reach for his hand.

Ben finally dares to look at you, furrowed eyebrows slowly coming to rest easily when he sees the loving and patient look swimming in your eyes. A year ago, he would have snatched his hand away and stormed out of the city to the comfort of his cave. He would have refused to return to this side of the planet out of fear of seeing whomever dared to touch him so intimately. But as he stands there in the middle of your parlor, with the warmth of your skin engulfing him so sweetly and lovingly, he can’t bring himself to let go of you, not because you might be offended, but because he can’t stand not feeling you close to him any longer.

“Ben, come with me. Please.” You wait until his shoulders sag in relief and acceptance before you pull him behind you and into the hallway. If anyone attempts to ask why he got priority over the others, you simply stare at them and narrow your eyes sternly to prevent them from thinking of breathing his way. As you lead Ben through the narrow and rather hot establishment, you feel a sense of unnerving peace wash over you. Here was a man that you knew, for certain, did not enjoy the company of others and yet followed you blindly and without question towards an unknown. Granted he came here a few times before, but you always led him to one of the more public rooms, knowing that he probably felt more comfortable seeing others being taken care of like him.

You look back once and bite into your lower lip when you see the hazed look upon his face. If you didn’t know any better, you’d think that his pupils were dilated simply from the mere touch of your fingers against his coarse skin.

“Where are you taking me?” His voice, laced with a hint of anxious desperation, makes you stop in your tracks, and you turn around to face him immediately, knowing that he may have still felt uncomfortable at the prospect of being alone with you.

“My room. It’s more private and…safe. I’m sorry, I- I should have asked you before I led you here. We can go back if you want.” You leave the sentiment open-ended, but you hope that he can see through the offer and notice how much you really didn’t want to be around anyone else but him.

“N-no. Perhaps it is better if you attend to me in more private quarters.” As soon as the words leave his lips, Ben catches onto the double-meaning in between the agreement, and he frantically shakes his head to make sure you didn’t think he expected anything more from you.

“Relax, it’s only me.” You rub his wrist and smile at him before you continue down the hallway, and Ben rolls his eyes at his idiocy as you look forward and lead him to your room. He doesn’t know what to expect from the night, but he hopes that you muster up the courage to cross the invisible line he’s planted in the sand ever since he came to you because he knew well enough that he wouldn’t be able to move past it himself.

When you finally reach your room, Ben squeezes your hand for a moment to remain grounded, his heart finally accepting to return to a normal heartbeat when you return the flex and keep your attention on him. He waits patiently as you push in the code to your doors, and when the heavy metal swishes open, he blinks slowly to remember his self-control before he steps into your room.

Whatever he thought he would find in your private chambers is somehow similar and different from reality. The room is not as spacious as the others you’ve taken him to but it certainly holds many more things, the most surprising of which was a large bacta tank right below one of the windows. It’s also more homey than the others, which is not surprising to him considering you did let him know that this was your personal room and not one occupied by the others during the hours of the parlor.

“Is it…pleasing to you?” Ben is surprised by the question, and he lets go of your hand to cross his arms and wander around the chambers. He notices a large bed at the opposite end of the room and regrets where his mind wanders to instantly. Ben is sure his beard is hiding a deep blush heating through his cheeks, and he clears his throat when he turns around and looks at you. He means to offer you a vague answer, but as soon as he takes in a deep breath and the natural scent of the room hits his senses, his heart skips a beat because-

Maker, if he thought your scent was maddening before, it was driving him crazy with lust and need for you now.

“You will find that I will never disagree with anything your hands caressed.”

It is far from the response he wanted to offer you, but the reaction he gets out of you from those simple words shoots straight to his cock and makes him clench his fists tightly to try and remain in control. He can see the visible shiver that courses through your body and the way your chest rises and falls rapidly at such a bold exclamation, and against his better judgment, Ben uncrosses his arms and approaches you with careful steps.

“You f-flatter me Ben.” He can tell you’re embarrassed by the attention he’s freely showering you with all of a sudden, and the shy reaction makes it more difficult for him to keep himself in check, not because of how submissive he’s sure you would be willing to be for him, but because he wants, more than anything, to see that same expression etched on your beautiful features as you came undone around his cock and marked him as yours.

“Never, little one. I only speak the truth.” Again, whereas he only wished to put you at ease, his body reacts of its own volition and Ben reaches to caress your cheek with his hand. If you’re surprised by the familiarity of the touch, you hide it quickly and choose to close your eyes to commit this moment to memory.

“B-Ben,” it’s your turn to reach for him, but as soon as you place your hand atop his right shoulder, Ben flinches away and grabs for his side. The reaction is enough to bring you back to reality, and you remember why you brought him to your room in the first place.

“Kriffing hell, are you trying to distract me on purpose?” You frown and move past him swiftly, not bothering to give him a chance to say anything as you prep the bacta tank.

“This will not be necessary, I assure you I am-” Ben follows closely behind you to get you to calm down and face him, but you brush him aside and shake your head as the tank fills with water. As you wait for it to be ready, you clear your throat and turn to him again, gaze more stern than Ben ever thought you capable of.

“I have never been overbearing with you Ben, and I think you can tell that it never bothered me to be quiet and patient with you. But I’m sorry I can’t be either of those things right now. You- you’re hurt and I am sure you neglected to take care of your wounds due to whatever sort of justification you thought up. So, please, if you ever valued our friendship, get in the tank. I can leave if you want some privacy, but just- maker, please let me take care of you.” You choose your words carefully and refuse to back down from Ben’s intense stare as he rubs his beard and visibly thinks over your proposition. He’s quiet for too long to your liking, but when he looks to the bacta tank behind you, he shakes his head and purses his lips tightly.

“I…cannot afford this, darling. Surely you know that.” Had you not known him, you would have been offended by his words. You almost snap at him but when you notice the ear-to-ear smile breaking across his face, you barely hold back from returning the expression and instead narrow your eyes at him.

“If you think me cruel enough to charge you for something so important, then I suggest you pack your things and leave…after you use the bacta tank of course.” You know he’s not buying your act one bit, and the idea that you’ve come to a point in your relationship with Ben where the two of you don’t mind teasing each other makes your stomach flutter with warmth.

“I brought nothing with me except the clothes on my back sweetheart.” His words light a flame across your chest then, and you swallow the lump in your throat as you keep his gaze and notice the curious eyebrow he was aiming at you. Surely he wasn’t flirting with you…was he?

“L-like I said, I can give you privacy if you-” You step back and aimlessly point to a door beside you to let him know that you don’t mind leaving him alone. But Ben shakes his head and moves into your space, ignoring the shocked look on your face when he pushes a few strands of hair away from your eyes to take a better look at you.

“You and I have known each other long enough, have we not? Unless it is you who wishes to leave, in which case, I will not force you to be here.” There is a hint of humor in his tone that makes you more flustered by the second and you don’t have the mind to form so much as a coherent thought to respond to him. Ben turns around and removes the longer robe covering his form, and it is only when he throws it gently on top of one of the chairs that he notices you not budging from your place.

“You are not leaving then?”

“It is my room…so no.” You hate how you trip over your words as you try to answer him, but from the looks of it, Ben doesn’t mind your embarrassed reaction one bit. In fact, he seems to have taken a liking to your more shy demeanor when he openly teases you.

“Very well. Would you be so kind as to help me out of these robes then? The wound is…it’s severe and limits my movement. I’d hate to irritate it any further.” He points to his right shoulder and side all the while studying your body language to ensure your comfort. The last thing he wants is to push you too far and cause you to run away from him. Ben expects to stand in silence for a while, but when you rub your hands together and approach him, he allows himself to relax further into the intimate and warm space.

“Sure, yes…I can do that. Just- just tell me if I make you uncomfortable. I’ll leave right away.” You reiterate once more as you lay your hands on top of his shoulders and rub the harsh fabric in between your fingers. Surely he didn’t remain in these robes all the time? His skin looked too soft to be covered with such coarse material, and before you dwell too long on how warm and inviting the skin of his clavicle felt beneath the tips of your fingers, Ben breaks the silence and rests his hands around your waist. He doesn’t try to pull you in closer, but he does squeeze you a little tightly as he returns your own words to you again.

“Nothing you will do will ever cause me discomfort, little one.”

“Oh.” It’s quite pathetic how easily Ben can cause your mental capabilities to decrease down to nothing, and you hope he doesn’t think less of you the longer the night stretches because you are sure you will melt into his arms if he so much as whispers a quick ‘thank you’ to you.

“May I?” Even though he has just given you permission to help him undress, you ask him anyway, knowing that it is better to receive affirmation from him than to accidentally make him wish he never came to you tonight.

“Please.” The way Ben pleads with you so willingly sends a ripple of lightning down your spine, and your breath hitches when you look up and see how focused he is on you. Knowing that things would only get more intense going forward, you sink your teeth into your lower lip and softly trail your hands down his chest to his stomach. You know you shouldn’t touch him more than necessary but seeing how open and almost inviting he seems to be with you now makes you tiptoe over that line of friendship a little. You say nothing as you rest your palms on top of his stomach, reminding yourself to breathe every couple of seconds when you notice Ben’s own body rising and falling beneath your touch.

If Ben is affected by your actions, he does a very good job at hiding it, making you wish he was comfortable enough with you to show you how much your intimate and rather lewd caresses are affecting him. For a moment, you swear his chest ceases moving when you finger the buckle of the belt holding his tunic tightly to his torso, but it resumes to the slightest of movement again when you unbuckle it and wrap your hands around his back to remove it carefully without hurting him.

As soon as you lean into his space, Ben forgets how to breathe, and he shuts his eyes tightly to refrain from closing his arms around you and smothering your lips with his own in a heated kiss. He can smell you much better now, and the flowery almost spicy scent of you is more potent than before. If he parts his lips now, he swears he can taste you on his tongue, but he chooses to keep them shut tightly to avoid any temptations.

You don’t notice the struggle Ben lives through for those brief moments, too busy wanting to make him as calm and comfortable as possible within your space. There’s a mutual understanding between the two of you as you reach for the bottom of his brown shirt and slowly tug it across his body. Only then does Ben break your gaze, and you hope it isn’t because he’s growing self-conscious in your presence. Your thoughts are answered in an instant when he chuckles embarrassingly and breaks the deep silence that befell you.

“I am afraid I may smell unpleasant to you. Forgive me, dear one. I cannot always afford bathwater where I live.”

The sad, broken tone of his voice wraps around your heart and clenches it painfully, making you wish you had the right to ask him to come and bathe here whenever he likes. But you know that he might misunderstand your kindness for something else, and you opt to shaking your head and continuing to raise the shirt until he could slip his left arm from its confines.

“It may be unpleasant to others, but your scent reminds me of…tenderness, compassion even.” You’re only speaking the truth to him but the honest sentiment must be too much for Ben because he lets out a shaky breath as soon as he wraps his mind around the words you just uttered. As much as you want to continue, you decide to keep quiet again, mostly because you are sure the sight of his skin will make you lose all coherent thought.

As you expected, your mind unravels haphazardly when you catch sight of the firm yet soft skin of his waist and stomach. Taking advantage of the few seconds of blindness as you remove his shirt from around his neck, you meditate on the trail of hair adorning his navel and hiding beneath his pants before you remember your mission and snap your attention back to his face. Ben looks to the side as soon as he is free of the shirt, and you mentally slap yourself for whatever shameless expression he may have written on your features as you tried to rid him of his clothes.

Right, his wounded right side. Focus on his wounded side and shoulder.

“Don’t try to raise your hand with me, I’ll do this slowly.” Ben doesn’t bother to offer you any response, and you get the sense that it might be because he is not used to showing so much skin to another being. As carefully as possible, you drag the tunic down his shoulder a few inches only to stop and gasp when you catch sight of the scarred flesh of his muscles.

“Oh sweetheart, what happened to you?” You don’t realize what you say until you meet Ben’s eyes and see the heartbroken look taking over his soul. The term of endearment must be a bit too much for him because in a matter of seconds, his blue orbs are a sea of unshed tears begging to be released from their confinement.

“It- it wasn’t…I didn’t-” The way he trips over his words lets you know that he couldn’t try to tell you how he came to own these horrid wounds even if he tried, so instead of pushing him any further, you blink away the tears forming in your own eyes and lean into his space. Without thinking much of what you’re doing, you hover over the top of his right side and lay the softest of kisses on his clavicle, barely managing to hold back from turning your head to the side and giving the same attention to his neck. You don’t give him a chance to say anything else as you continue to leave a trail of kisses down each inch of skin you reveal to the warm air. Once you’ve completely removed his shirt from his body, you take a step back and bring his right arm closer to your face. Making certain that he was focusing only on you, you lift his hand to your lips and kiss across his wrist to his forearm, hoping that the gentle touches weren’t making matters worse. When you’ve left your mark over the skin that wasn’t too sensitive or too inflamed, you lay his arm down to his side and muster up the courage to meet his eyes once more.

The look he gives you is both heartwarming and heartbreaking, and you can tell that he was trying his hardest to not break down completely in your presence.

Ben wants to say so much. He wants to thank you for your unusual kindness and caring touches. He wants to beg you to keep leaving your mark on him because the searing heat your lips left across his skin is better than the burning pins and needle sensations he’s felt for weeks now. He wants to repay your patience by kissing away all doubts from your mind, doubts he saw from the first time he came to you. He wants to shower you with pleasant words, whispers of his affections and dreams that he was now certain you would not be opposed to.

But all that manages to leave his mouth are two quiet, unsure words.

“Thank you.”

You smile at him then, and Ben thanks the maker that you don’t say anything else because he’s sure he would collapse then and there if he heard your voice purr more reassuring compliments to him.

The moment evaporates into thin air, however, when all of a sudden, you get down on your knees in front of him and look up into his tear-stained eyes just as you grab his shoes. A hint of panic washes over his entire body and you gulp nervously when he reaches down and grabs hold of both of your shoulders to prevent you from doing anything. You’re not sure what he thought you were about to do, but when you notice the soft muscles of his chest flex tightly, you realize his mind was racing towards a more inappropriate link of thinking.

“I’m just going to take your shoes off.” Even though your voice is barely louder than a whisper, you flinch at how harsh and gravely it comes out, not because of how unpleasant it might be but because Ben twitches when he hears it fill the silent air. When he doesn’t say anything back, you let go of his legs and keep your hands clasped in your lap. Ben’s attention shifts down to look at your hands, and you almost frown in question when you notice the tight clench of his jaws as he continues to look at your stance.

“Is this still okay?” You follow up shortly after, praying to the maker that he doesn’t collect his belongings and walk out the door.

“Y-yes.” He lets go of your shoulders and stands up to his height again soon after, and it takes every ounce of control in your body to not beg him to have his way with you. Ben may not appear menacing and dominant when he walks around with his hunched back and inviting body language, but as you look at him now, without the multitude of clothes often hiding him from your hungry gaze, you can’t help but find his presence commanding, more so than anyone else you’ve ever met.

Taking in a deep breath, you nod in return and lift his ankle off the ground, biting into the inside of your cheek when you feel the warm skin erupt in goosebumps underneath your touch.

Maker, he was more touch-starved than you thought.

As you remove his shoes and socks, your train of thought takes a turn for the worse when it comes to your attention that you might be the first person Ben has revealed himself to in a long time. A part of you hopes that you are the first to ever lay eyes on him, but you knew that, with the Coruscant accent he tried his best to hide whenever he spoke, this was highly unlikely. Ben was one of the most handsome men you’ve ever had the pleasure of seeing, and this was now. You smile to yourself when you think of all the hearts he broke in his younger days, and you quickly thank the maker for not being one of them because you very much liked him as he was in this moment.

Reserved but engaging.

Even though Ben isn’t in touch with the Force as he used to be, he can still see through the dazed veil that overtook you as soon as you began removing his shoes. He wants to break through that blanket of doubt and assure you that you are the first who’s seen him this vulnerable in decades, but he thinks against it, not knowing how you would react to such a sudden confession.

He composes himself as you stand again, but that composure falters when he feels your fingers rest at the top of his pants. He looks down and notices how still you’ve become, and he gulps rather loudly when he realizes what you were silently asking him. Shifting his attention back to you once more, Ben doesn’t bother hiding the rapid rise and fall of his chest as his heart rate elevates, and before you can ask him if what you’re doing is acceptable, he nods at you and braces himself for what’s to follow.

You’re not sure if it’s better for him if you avoided his gaze or kept contact with his anxiety-filled blue orbs, but you opt for the latter, knowing that he probably wouldn’t appreciate you devouring him as you pulled down his pants. Without missing a beat, you unclasp the button keeping the fabric tightly hugged around his hips, slowly lowering the zipper to give him time to remove your hands from him. When he doesn’t push your fingers away, you continue lowering the zipper until his pants are hanging loosely around his waist.

“Is this still okay Ben?”

You’re not sure what sort of response you expected to receive from him, but the low groan he graces you with is certainly the last thing you expected to hear. Ben must notice the shock of the noise he just made etched on your features because he nods frantically soon after and bites into his lower lip as you let his pants fall down his legs. As much as you want to take in every bit of his skin, you keep your gaze sternly above his neck, and say nothing more as you take his hands in yours and pull him towards you. Ben doesn’t dare look elsewhere, and as he steps out of his pants, he does everything in his power to distract himself from his body’s reaction to your touches.

He prays that you aren’t offended by the natural reflex currently plaguing his mind, and it’s only when he sees how respectful you’re trying to be that he forgets his worries and looks away to the bacta tank.

“Ben, I can see how nervous you are. Like I said, I can leave to give you more privacy. If you wish to take off your…umm, the rest of your clothes, I will move to the next room and wait for you until you’re done.” You squeeze his hands tightly to let him know that you meant every word you uttered, and you’re surprised when he clutches your palms in return.

“Don’t leave, please. I- I want you here, but I do not think I am ready to take this off just yet.”

“That’s okay. If you want, I have something else you can wear so you don’t get these wet? I’ll have them washed for you too so they could be ready by the time we’re done.” Again, you don’t realize the innuendo until you’ve spoken the last few words. If Ben notices, he says nothing and instead agrees to your offer. You let go of his hands and move towards one of your dressers, quickly grabbing a pair of loose shorts before returning to his side.

“I- I’ll just turn around until you’re done.” You hand him the softer fabric and smile when he nods again and shoots you a bashful smile. Before he can take his underclothes off, you lean down and snatch his pants and socks from the floor, not bothering to look at him again as you turn around and take his shirt and robe from the chair you laid them on. You throw them over your arm and wait patiently for Ben to tell you when you can turn around. There’s quiet shuffling behind you for a few moments, and you decide to study the corner of your wall to avoid thinking of Ben looks like completely nude.

Ben clears his throat as loudly as possible to let you know that he’s dressed again, and you hope that he can see how much you’re trying to accommodate him. When you turn around, you gasp at the site of him standing in front of the bacta tank. As hard as you try not to stare at him, you can’t help but let your eyes wander down his broad form to his thick thighs and firm legs.

“Maker Ben, you’re beautiful.”

It’s not what you planned on telling him, but it is what comes out, and you apologize quickly when you look up at him and see the blush creeping down his neck to his chest.

“T-thank you darling.”

Not knowing where to go from here, you pretend he didn’t just call you another personal term of endearment and reach to grab his undergarments from him. Ben hands it to you and waits patiently until you leave to the other room before he allows his shoulders to relax. He takes those few moments to collect his bearings, looking down at his almost nude form to see if there was anything wrong with him. It’s been so long since another saw him so exposed and vulnerable, and he hopes that you like what he has to offer even a little bit. He is not as lean and muscular as he once was, and those doubts from earlier in the day come creeping back into his mind when he sees all the imperfections littering his skin. Before he can dwell too much on them though, you’re back in the room with two flasks in your hands.

“Umm, I wasn’t sure if you wanted to receive your usual massage so I brought these out in case you decided on one after you’re done with the bacta tank.” When Ben says nothing in return, you place the two flasks down onto the table and approach him slowly.

“Ben, I want you to know that you’re in charge here. I won’t ever do anything you don’t want. But…I do need you to tell me if I am. I know this might be all new to you but I won’t know if I’m doing anything wrong unless you tell me.” You speak as gently as possible, wanting him to know that you’re not angry with him but that you really did need him to give you even the shortest of responses.

“Forgive me, you’re right. I- I merely cannot trust my own voice at the moment, hence my reluctance to respond to your kindness. If you are not otherwise occupied for the evening, I would very much like to receive one after.” His voice is hoarse and if you didn’t know any better, you’d think he was a little turned on from this entire situation. You couldn’t blame him though. You’ve been turned on ever since you walked out and saw him waiting at the corner of the parlor.

“No need to apologize, a simple yes or no would be enough. Although, I won’t oppose hearing your voice more often.” You try to ease the anxiety floating around him, and you giggle when he raises a curious eyebrow and shoots you an actual, deep smile.

“Is that so? You enjoy listening to my voice, little one?” The teasing remark, along with the flirtatious petname, are almost enough to have you begging for him to fuck you against the wall, but you hold yourself back from saying what you really want to tell him.

“Y-yes, I do. It’s very gentle and soothing. You could read a manual on how to shut down a droid and I would consider it poetry.” You respond instead and move around him to get the bacta tank ready for him. Ben hums lowly and it’s only when you turn around and look at him that you see the same struggle you were experiencing taking hold of him as well.

“Good to know.”

Although it’s an open-ended comment, you know better than to keep the conversation going down that road. As much as you want to continue flirting with him, you don’t want to be distracted from taking care of wounds.

“Whenever you’re ready then,” you hold the mask up to him, but Ben shakes his head and walks around to get into the tank.

“That won’t be necessary. I do not intend on remaining in there long enough to fall asleep.” His tone is more assertive than before so you don’t try to argue with him, knowing that this was already difficult for him to do.

“Whatever makes you comfortable.” You say as you put the breathing mask away and stand aside to give him enough room to lower himself into the tank. He’s slow and careful in his movements, and you watch him closely to see if he needs your help with anything. He sits down into the tank and looks towards you again.

“You will not leave?”

The question surprises you, and you take a step towards him, reaching out for his left hand and taking it in between your own softly to reassure him.

“I won’t, I promise.” Ben sighs in relief at your response and he turns away as he slowly descends his body below the warm, healing waters. You quickly grab a towel and place it at the edge of the tank in time for him to lower his neck down and rest on it.

“You know, you might be the first person to ever use the bacta tank as a bathtub and I think it’s hilarious.” You break the silence after a while, and watch as he chuckles at your words.

“I am glad I can be amusing to you sweetheart.” You shut your eyes and meditate on his voice for a few moments, thankful that he was already finding this relaxing. You stand next to him in silence for a few minutes, and when his breathing looks constant, you think that he may have fallen asleep out of fatigue. As soon as you try to move away to bring another towel for after he finishes, his hand leaves the waters of the bacta tank and take hold of your wrist.

“You said you would not leave.” His eyes are much more intense than before, and you blink at him in confusion before you reach for his wrist and massage his skin.

“I’m not. I was just going to bring you a towel.” You don’t dare look away from him, knowing that he might misunderstand your behavior and think that he made you uncomfortable. Instead of letting go of your hand, he shuts his eyes and rests his head back against the edge of the tank before he lowers his arm into the water again. You don’t bother asking him why he was so afraid of remaining in the bacta tank by himself, and instead shift closer to him so your own hand can hold onto him better. Pushing your arm deeper into the water, you grab hold of his forearm and rest your head against the side of the glass, all the while studying his calm and relaxed features as the medicinal components of the liquid began to work through his wounds.

Time passes easily as Ben relaxes further in the water, and you trace small shapes across his forearm to help ease his anxiety. You notice the occasional eyebrow twitch whenever the water gets warmer and bubbles around his arm. You study him closely and try your best to think less of what his skin would feel like sliding against your own as he coaxes pleasure from your body, but then his upper thigh touches the back of your hand suddenly and your attention shifts from his features to the expanse of his legs.

You lick your lips when you see old scars littering his light, golden muscles and the thought that he could manhandle you any minute if he wished to causes you to clench your thighs tightly. Looking up at his face one last time, you make sure his eyes are still closed and serene before you allow yourself to memorize his broad form. Your breathing becomes erratic as you trail your gaze down his torso, fingers itching to reach over and rub across the blonde, reddish hair adorning his chest and stomach. There’s nothing you want more than to ask him what he used to do before he came to Tatooine, but you know that it would only make him feel worse for not opening up to you any further.

Stars, he must have been someone important if there are this many scars across his body.

As you descend your focus down his body, you fixate on his hips and the dip of skin below the edge of the shorts. It was such a shame he hid his body from the world. You knew many who would pay good money just to look at a specimen like Ben. He was hard and soft in all the right places, and from the looks of the slowly forming bulge straining against the fabric, you got the sense that he could have anyone he wanted. He would only say a word and they would come.

Literally.

“Do you always stare at your wounded clients as if they are exotic delicacies?” Ben’s deep voice makes you jump from your place, and you try to remove your hand from him but he holds onto your arm tightly and keeps you close to the bacta tank.

“I- I’m sorry…I shouldn’t have-” You try to think of a believable reason behind you openly and shamelessly gawking at his nudity but words fail you when you meet his eyes and notice just how dilated and almost hungry his pupils are.

“I was not complaining, my darling.” It’s soothing to hear that he doesn’t mind the way you’re staring at him, but you turn away with a smile on your face when he tilts his head to the side and mirrors your own actions. You can tell he’s also raking his eyes over your body from your periphery, and you hope he likes whatever he sees.

“If you must know…no, I don’t.” You pretend to pick at something on your dress when you finally manage to utter a grammatically correct sentence. The little hum Ben throws at you is somehow in response to your words as well as his own actions, and you wish he didn’t have such an intense effect on you.

“Hmm.”

“Only those I find interesting.” You look back at him, and feel your heart skip a beat when you see the way he’s staring at the skin peeking from underneath the thin fabric of the dress.

“You find me interesting?” His hand slithers further up your arm until he’s grasping your shoulder, and your breathing grows erratic when the dampness of his palm drips down your exposed shoulders and wets the top of the dress. His eyes are becoming more difficult to hold contact with but you remain steadfast, wanting him to know of the effect he’s having on you, wanting him to see how easily can have you, how quickly you’d submit to him if he so much as touches your cheek again.

“Y-yes, amongst other things.” Against your better judgment, you reach for his hair with your hand and comb it away from his face, wanting to take a better look at him in case he decided to take this a step further. What you don’t expect is for Ben to take hold of the edge of the tank and push himself up until he’s only a few inches away from you. You can feel the heat of the water radiating off of his body, and you wish he could just drag you to your bed and fuck you until you couldn’t remember anything but the sound of his name falling from your lips.

“Enlighten me then.” Ben breathes against the corner of your mouth, and you part your lips in hopes of tasting his smile on your tongue. His scent overwhelms you in the best way possible, and you hate how it will soon become the same as the oils you’ve set aside for him.

A strange thought breaks through the spell you’ve fallen under, and you realize too late that your expression is reflecting the worry taking hold of your heart when Ben’s smile falters for a moment, and sits back in the water as he makes note of the reluctant look aimed at him.

“I…don’t want to lose you.” It’s perhaps the most vague sentiment you can ever tell anyone during such a moment, mostly because it wasn’t prefaced by a related question. You don’t know what else to say though and you know nothing else will come close to explaining the fear of never seeing Ben again. Thinking that he might get weirded out by the rather general statement, you turn away from him to prepare for whatever cold, uncommitted response you’ll receive from him.

But like before, Ben surprises you and takes hold of your chin in between his fingers. As much as you don’t want to look at him, you obey his soft yet assertive motion and slowly face him. His expression switches to a more welcoming and teasing smile when he finally looks into your eyes and you can’t control your own muscles as you focus on his inviting body language. Against your better judgment, you reach for him and place one hand on his chest while the other grabs his upper arm, wanting to keep yourself grounded so you don’t run away from him as soon as he speaks.

“You will not lose me, little one. I only ask that you speak in truths.” Ben grows bold with his touches, waiting until you slip your hand a little lower across his stomach before he traces your lower lip with his thumb. His gaze shifts to your parted lips and he licks his own when he notices your tongue peak out and almost wrap around his fingers.

“I- I could never lie to you Ben. Never.” You shut your eyes and whisper to him as he continues to draw patterns over your heated flesh. When you feel his hand descend lower and rest on top of your neck, you squeeze his arm and urge him to do as he wishes freely and without worry. He doesn’t flex one finger and you come close to pulling him into your space, but before you can do that, you feel the hold he has on your neck tighten a bit, forcing you to open your eyes and look straight into his.

“Promise?” Ben asks as he moves out of the water closer to you, not caring a single bit for how wet you’re becoming the more he touches you. His palm is now firmly encompassing your neck like a necklace, and you trail your hand from his biceps down his arm slowly until you have a firm grip on his wrist. A sigh of relief escapes both of your mouths in unison as you come to the same conclusion seconds apart.

Ben came to your parlor tonight with no hope of ever becoming brave enough to tell you how deeply he cares for you, and as soon as you saw him, you prayed to the maker that it wouldn’t be the last time he’d visit you.

As you now stare deeply into each others’ eyes, you come to understand that your desires have always mirrored each other, and that you are more than willing to give into the weeks and months of desperate need, even if you were uncertain of what would happen after tonight.

“Please.”

You plead against his cheek and hold your breath when you feel his other arm slowly wrap around your waist. He’s about to pull you towards him when the bacta tank shuts down and causes the waters to remain still. Ben clenches his jaw tightly as a new silence fills the room, and he reluctantly pulls away from you when he opens his eyes and sees a similar expression of irritation etched on your features. He can’t help but chuckle though as you roll your eyes at the timing of the sound.

“Hmm, I do believe you owe me a massage.” He lets go of you and maneuvers himself around until he’s kneeling in the large glass tub. Ben says nothing as he slowly stands in the bacta tank and stares down at you, and it’s only when he tilts his head to the side and raises an eyebrow that you realize he’s waiting for you to bring him a towel so he doesn’t make a mess of your floors.

“S-sorry, yes. I uhh- I did say that.” You shake your head and run towards one of your dressers, instantly reaching for the softer towels you reserved for yourself without a thought. You bring it back to him and try your best to avoid looking at the way the fabric of the long shorts hug his skin. You ignore the prominent bulge begging for your attention as you hand him the towel, not waiting for him to dry himself before you walk to the massage table near the window and prepare it for him.

Ben doesn’t pull his attention away from you for a second, and a new amusement takes over him when he sees how hard you’re trying to remain respectful when a moment ago, you were practically presenting yourself to him on a golden platter. He takes advantage of your sudden shyness and slips out of the shorts you handed him earlier. Hanging them on the edge of the bacta tank, Ben wraps the towel around his waist and fastens it at the corner before he slowly walks towards you.

He wants nothing more than to push himself flush against your back, but he reminds himself that this back and forth teasing would be well worth it once you finally told him what you truly wanted.

“It’s up to you whether you want to keep the shorts on or-” The words die in your throat when you turn around and see Ben standing a few feet away from you wrapped in a towel. Your eyes shift to the bacta tank behind, and when you realize that he’s wearing nothing underneath the soft fabric slowly clinging tighter to his body, you gulp nervously and move aside so he could climb onto the bed.

“The last thing I intend is to make a mess of your room. If you mind of course, I will gladly put them on again.” Ben teases as he approaches you, only to chuckle at you when you cut him off with a rather quick and enthusiastic response.

“NO! I mean…uhh, no that’s- that’s okay. Whatever makes you comfortable.” You mentally kick yourself when you hear him hum at you, rolling your eyes at the grin that appears on his handsome features as he begins climbing onto the massage bed.

“Like I said earlier, please tell me if I do something you don’t like.” You say as Ben maneuvers himself around until he’s laying on his stomach, wanting him to remember that he was still completely in charge. When he settles down and fixes the towel around his hips, you take a deep breath and will yourself to think of anything but how inviting his skin looks.

“Judging by the number of times you’ve spoken similar words to me, I suspect it is I who is making you uncomfortable.” Ben glances to the side and smirks at you when he sees you nervously clutching the different flasks of oil near your chest.

“Uncomfortable wouldn’t be the word I’d use.” You whisper to him as you set one flask down and tilt the other in your hand until enough is poured in your palm. You move around to begin at his upper back when Ben sits up and silently stares at you. You know what he’s asking and you hate how it only takes one simple look for you to be at his mercy.

“Nervous perhaps…or umm, overwhelmed. Whichever you find more pleasing.” You blink away and take another step towards him, hoping he’d get the idea and drop the subject before you knelt down and pleaded for him to claim you.

“It is not my intention to inspire such feelings within you, little one.” Ben says firmly, and you realize he probably assumed the negative connotations behind those words, not the ones you actually felt. He doesn’t bother to lay back down again and you dread having to clarify what you meant when you said he made you nervous.

“It’s you so I- I don’t mind it.” You smile shyly at him, and look down at your hands when you see the second he catches on to what you’re saying. Ben hums lowly as he settles down again and you sigh in relief at managing to convince him to move on without you embarrassing yourself any further. Before the warm oil trickles down your wrist any further, you softly begin to rub it across his upper back and bite into your lower lip when you feel Ben relax at your touch as soon as you dig your thumbs into the muscles across his shoulders. He tenses for a few seconds when you trail your palms all the way up to his neck, and you almost stop when you see the way he’s reacting to you. But when he groans deeply and stretches his neck down so you can have more access to his skin, you continue to stroke his shoulders until he visibly melts into the bed.

You want to ask him if he wants you to do anything different, but as you pour more oil on his back and rub it until his skin is glistening like the golden suns, you forget how to form a coherent sentence. The longer you knead those knots, the louder Ben’s moans grow, so much so that you vaguely hear him apologizing for the inappropriate sounds he was conveying to you.

It’s only when you focus on his biceps and triceps that he finally breaks the silence and snaps you out of your haze again.

“Tell me.” Ben demands all of a sudden and you halt in your movement when you sweep your eyes over to his face and see them wide open and staring right at you.

“W-what?”

“I think you know,” he grins at you, raising a curious eyebrow when you blink at him knowingly before you return to massaging his left arm, purposely avoiding the right one in case he still felt pain coursing through it.

“This is hardly the time to-” For the first time since you’ve met him, Ben cuts you off mid-sentence and raises his head far enough to take a proper look at you. You ignore the way he’s looking at you and focus on his forearm, praying to the maker that he doesn’t notice your skin crawling with goosebumps every time you feel the hair on his arms tickle your fingers.

“Do not attempt to distract me, darling. On the contrary, I believe this is the perfect time to tell me what you think of me.” He rests his cheek against the pillow once more, but you knew he wouldn’t drop this anytime soon. You move around to stand at the head of the bed, and as you reach for the other flask of oil, you feel Ben’s hands reach down and grip your upper thighs to pull you closer.

“B-Ben…”

“I only wished to bring you closer, nothing more.” He whispers to you as he returns his hands to his sides again, making you wish he wasn’t so respectful of whatever boundaries remained between the two of you. Shaking those filthy thoughts from your head, you don’t care how intimate you’re nearing him as you lean down and push your hands down the center of his back until you’ve reached the edge of the towel. Ben moans shamelessly when you slip your fingers beneath the towel and push your thumbs harshly into the round muscles of his butt. You continue to apply pressure up and down his back, occasionally loosening the towel to get better access to his backside. You almost giggle when you see Ben raising his hips off of the bed to allow you to pull on the towel, but you hold yourself back, afraid he might think you’re laughing at him.

Without giving him a warning, you take the oil and move to the opposite end of the bed, choosing to ignore the way he spreads his legs wider to get more comfortable. Mirroring your actions from before, you pour the oil on one leg and dig your knuckles into his calves until you hear him sigh in relief again. Ben says nothing else for a while and you suspect it is due to how close you’re beginning to get to the more sensitive areas. Even though you slip your hands underneath the towel again, you make sure to only reach the lower skin of his upper thighs and no further, not wanting him to think you want to force him through distraction. As you turn to the other leg, you can’t help but admire the numerous dips and scars across his entire body. Again, there was nothing necessarily attractive about a body mapped with different types of scars, especially when you could tell that some of them weren’t left behind by a simple blaster but by something that ran much hotter.

A strange thought enters your mind all of a sudden at a particularly nasty gash you saw on his side earlier, but you brush it aside when you realize how pathetic it must be. There’s no way this man ever came in contact with something like a lightsaber. He mostly kept to himself. Besides, if he did ever meet the end of such a weapon, there was no chance he could live and tell the tale.

“You’re drifting again.”

“Sorry, I was just…I was admiring your body.” You decide to stick as close to the truth as possible without making a fool out of yourself.

“There is nothing to admire about an old man’s beaten body.” You know he meant to pass his comment off as a joke, but the self-deprecating, almost sad tone of his voice makes you think he probably thought you were bluffing to avoid answering any of his questions.

“Turn around for me.” You tap his leg twice and pretend to distract yourself with something on your dress so you don’t accidentally get an eyeful of what’s below the towel should it slip by accident from him. It takes him a little longer than usual to settle down again, and when you turn around to look at him, you realize it’s because of the not-so-subtle reaction his body was having in response to your touch.

“I told you I’d never lie to you Ben, and I meant it.” Ben’s eyes flutter open at your words, and he watches you closely as you pour oil on his chest and slowly rub it across his scarred skin. His gaze is more intense than ever, and you don’t dare break contact with his eyes out of fear of making him think you are lying to him.

“I’ve seen many through the years, almost every type of shape and color and size…but none compare to yours. You’re…unique, in the most beautiful way possible.” You swear his chest rumbles with a growl at your confession, and you bite into your cheek when you see it rise and fall at a quicker pace. Looking down at his hands, you barely manage to hold back from digging your nails into his chest when you see the way he’s clenching his fists tightly at your comment.

“I- I am most flattered by your a-admiration but-” Ben grunts when you accidentally graze one of his nipples, his mind instantly going into hyperdrive and making him lose his train of thoughts. “But I highly doubt this is the most impressive form you’ve ever come across.” His voice is strained, that you’re certain of, and you want to see how far you can take it with him before he can no longer hold back. You’re close to thinking against it, but as you continue to knead his tight muscles, you notice a dark blush creeping down his neck to his chest and decide to tease him just a little bit more.

“Are you seriously going to mansplain to me who I find attractive?” You ask in what you hope is your most stern tone, and it must be more assertive than you think because Ben turns away from your hands and focuses on you again with a slight hint of panic coloring his cheeks.

“No, I- I would never presume to tell you h-” Ben falters when he notices a dangerous glint in your eyes, and he drops his head against the pillow once he understands you were only trying to get on his nerves.

“You minx,” he whispers beneath his breath and shuts his eyes again, allowing you a moment of respite to pay more attention to his tired muscles. A different silence falls over the room soon after, and you finally manage to take your mind away from the many things you wish to do to Ben. There’s an occasional sigh that falls from his lips every time you dig your knuckles into a particularly knotted muscle.

Making your way around the bed, you clear your throat softly as you work your way down his stomach, and Ben becomes more vocal as he feels your hands descend beneath the edge of the towel again. Unlike earlier, when you kept your touches right at the top of the soft fabric, you become more bold with him and bring your fingers right where his waist dips and creates that faint v-line. He hisses as soon as your nails pass across the coarse hair peppering his navel at the top of his crotch, and his eyes flutter open instantly, only to see you already staring at him with a fire he’s never seen on another’s features before.

“Sweet one,” Ben bites into his lower lip as you shiver at the endearment, and he reaches for your wrist slowly to hold onto it, afraid that he won’t be able to say what he really wants if you continued to map his skin as if you already claimed it.

“Ben,” you sigh his name as you slip from his grip and move on to his legs. He watches you closely and furrows his eyebrows when you pour more oil on your palms and begin to rub his legs. He sits up on his elbows and gulps nervously as you move beneath the towel and move the warm viscous liquid up his thighs. Almost on instinct, Ben spreads his thighs to give you more access, and he somehow finds the will to continue breathing even as you stare straight into his eyes the higher you go up his thighs.

“Believe me when I tell you, I’ve never met anyone I wanted to worship this much. You’re more beautiful than any star, and I want nothing more than to ease your pain, perhaps even your loneliness.” You coo at him, and watch as he struggles to find a proper response to your revelation. When he takes too long to say anything, you bring your body as close to his own as possible and drive your nails deeper into the skin of his thick thighs. Ben groans deeply and you can’t help but smile at him when you see the prominent tent forming underneath the towel flex slightly before it rests again.

“You- you find me attractive?” The disbelief in his voice almost causes you to double over in laughter because not an hour ago, he had his hand wrapped around your throat like he had every right to touch you so intimately and here he was still questioning, not only your behavior, but your words as well.

“Oh come on baby, I said that ages ago. Catch up and I promise to make you feel good.” Your fingers trail a little higher again, making Ben jolt all of a sudden and fist his hands against the bedsheets.

“Dear one…do not think you need to do this for my sake. I hold the utmost respect towards you and I cannot bear the thought of ever forcing you to-” The rest of the sentiment dies in his throat as soon as you lean over him and rest your cheek against his hip. Ben ceases to breathe when you flutter your eyelashes at him as you turn to the knot on the side of the towel and bite into it. You don’t move another muscle though, wanting to give him the chance to push you away or apologize for not wanting to do this. When he inches his hand slowly to your neck and nods at you, you give his waist a quick kiss before you take the fabric of the towel between your teeth and pull on it.

Ben grips your neck tightly as you raise your head and bring the towel away from his skin. He tries to sit up on his elbows again but he realizes too soon he doesn’t have the strength to do anything apart from stare at you as you worshiped him.

You, on the other hand, don’t look down at the newly exposed skin, wanting Ben to see that you are willing to take things slow for his sake. Your palms remain planted on his inner and outer thigh, and when the knot comes undone, you push the fabric across his hips until it falls on either side of him.

“Darling I-” He starts to say something but you cut him off instantly, wanting to tell him everything you’ve felt for him ever since he bid you a shy ‘hello’ that fateful time.

“Tell me what you want Ben, please. I’ll do anything to please you, anything. You- you’ve been on my mind for so long, and I just want to make you feel good. Do what you want with me…use me, my hands, my mouth…my-”

The only warning you have before Ben drags you on top of him is a deep growl conveying nothing but absolute desperation and anguish. You’re shocked by the sudden display of power Ben exhibits all of a sudden, not because you didn’t think he was capable of pulling you into his lap with ease, but because you didn’t think he’d ever grow so bold with you. Up until now, he’s been nothing but a gentleman, always asking you in his own way if you were still comfortable with whatever was going on between the two of you. But to see him lose his self-control to the point where he had to bring you on top of him without a care for his own fatigued muscles sets your chest on fire.

“S-stars…Ben-” You moan his name when he twists his fingers into your hair and tugs on it until your throat is on full display for him. No sooner than that do you feel his mouth kissing and nipping at the juncture of your neck, and don’t dare push him away for even a second. It’s Ben’s turn to grunt against you as you dig your fingers into his chest, and without putting much thought into it, he wraps his other arm around your back and forces your chest flush against his own. He can feel your pert nipples rub deliciously against his chest, and he reminds himself that he still has to ask for permission before he rips your flimsy dress to bits.

“Have you any idea of the effect you have on me?”

You sigh heavily as you gyrate your hips against his hard cock, giggling to yourself when the action distracts him from leaving his mark on every bit of your skin.

“I- I think I have a small idea actually…well, it’s not that small actually. More like a- oh fuck, oh my stars…it’s a hard, thick, delicious idea.” Your jumbled words earn you a chuckle from the man beneath you, and you open your eyes to look down at him when he lays back down against the pillow and brings you along with him.

“It is you who deserves to be worshiped, sweet one. Believe me, I want nothing more than to take my time with you, relish in the way I coax pleasure from every bit of this lovely body of yours, mark you with kisses that rival the stars in this galaxy…but I can bear it no longer.” His unabashed confessions send a strike of lightning down your spine, making you arch your back against him to feel his lips on your heated skin again. You sink your fingers into his hair the harder he pulls you against him, and only when his palm grabs at your ass and pushes it against his cock do you dare to pull on his sun-kissed strands. Ben thrusts his hips into your stomach, the sensation of his hard and heavy length reminding you of how full you will feel in a matter of minutes.

Pleading words slowly form on your lips in response to his rather needy requests, but you can’t find the will to part with them due to the sheer hold Ben has on you, physically and emotionally. His arms tighten around you when he notices you trying to remove yourself from him. You look down to try and put his mind at ease, tell him that you’d never think of letting him go now that he was touching you so sweetly. But as soon as you set your eyes on his own dilated ones, you forget how to breathe and pray that he puts you out of your misery. Thankfully, Ben doesn’t take too long to notice the hungry way in which you continue to eye his lips, and before either of you say anything else, he’s pulling you down by the neck and meeting you halfway with what you would later describe as the most breathtaking kiss you’d ever been gifted in your entire life.

You always thought Ben would kiss you softly, perhaps slip his tongue reluctantly into your mouth if you parted your lips for him. And perhaps he does savor such soft touches, you pray you can find out later if he prefers them. This moment, however, reminds you that this man was very much capable of bringing you to your knees with a simple look if he so wished. The thought of being at his mercy forces you closer to him, and you tilt your head to the side as he deepens the kiss, his tongue working magic against you and allowing you to look forward to where else it can leave its mark.

Judging from the hungry and aggressive control Ben displays, you don’t bother trying to take control of the moment. The hum of approval he graces you with when he feels you completely melt against him coaxes a moan from your throat, and you manage to break the kiss for one second to breathe before Ben shoves his mouth against yours again. You almost sob at how much he wants you, and you almost do as well. But when you feel his fingers slowly tug on the ends of your long clothes, you forget everything else and raise yourself above him a few inches to give him more access to your clothes. It’s his turn to break the kiss, and you nuzzle into his neck and whimper when he bunches your dress all the way across your hips.

“Love, will you let me have you? I promise to pleasure you later with nothing but my lips, kiss every inch of your skin until you beg me to stop. But right now, I- Force help me, I will surely die if I do not feel the heat of your cunt around my cock.” Ben pleads against your ear, kissing and nipping across the heated skin of your cheek as he keeps the dress around your waist with one hand while the other squeezes your ass. The soft material of your panties makes him slam his head against the pillow twice to control himself until you give him a proper answer.

“Maker…please just-” You cry his name once he slips his fingers beneath the flimsy article of clothing and pulls on it until it’s perfectly nestled across your aching clit. It strains against his ministrations, and you wish he can just rid you of it so you can feel his cock slide against your cunt. Not knowing what else to do, you turn to him a little and leave a trail of wet kisses from his beard down to the clenched muscles of his neck and shoulders. When you slowly begin to suck your mark on his jugular, Ben thrusts his cock hard against you again, almost causing you to slip from his lap at the sudden and aggressive reaction. He can feel your dress still keeping you from him and in an effort to maneuver you better so he can slip it off, his fingers slip below the front of your panties and pass deliciously against your wet cunt. Both of you cease all movement instantly, but the warmth of his hand feels too good against your pulsating clit so you throw all caution aside and push yourself harder against him. His fingers pass perfectly across your slit and forces an obscene moan deep from your throat.

“Let me have you. Let me make love to you sweetheart. Let me mark you as mine…claim you so the stars know whom you belong to.” Ben pleads one last time as he expertly rubs your clit and grips your hair tightly to have some semblance of control until you consent to his needs.

“Please Ben, I- I want you so fucking badly. Do whatever you want with me. I don’t care what you do, just don’t stop touching me. Make me yours…oh fuck, take me now, and don’t be gentle.” You were never one to beg for anything from a man, but as Ben tilts his head to the side and whispers the faintest promises to you, you throw all self-consciousness and respect aside for the sake of meeting the end of those confessions.

“Anything for you, love.” Ben promises against your lips, not wasting another precious second as he lets go of your ass and brings his hand to his mouth. You watch as he spits on his fingers and shoves those same digits into your mouth to collect your own essence before he reaches for his cock. You try to throw your head back to savor the moment but Ben keeps a firm grip on your hair, silently letting you know that he wanted to watch as he filled you with his dick for the first time. You furrow your eyebrows at the vague sensation of Ben’s hands rubbing his cock to with your combined spit, and when you can’t take it any longer, you cry his name again to urge him on.

“Fuck me…please Ben.”

The request washes over Ben like a prayer, and he leans up to capture your lips in another heated kiss just as he shoves your panties to the side and teases your clit with the head of his cock. You can feel how warm and hard he is against your slit, and you shove your hips forward to try and catch his length in between your wet lips. Ben is quicker though, and he holds you back with a simple pull to your strands, a small warning to ensure that you understand who was in control.

“Little one, I want to hear you beg for my cock. Beg me to fill your cunt.” The filthy command sends a shiver down your spine, and you begin to shake in his arms the more he teases your clit with his length.

“Ben, I can’t- maker, it hurts. It hurts not having you inside me. I can’t take it anymore, I want you to fill me with your cock. Fuck me the way you’ve always wanted, I- I promise to be good for you. Please…please give me y- ahhh…”

He almost panics at the first few words you sob as you stare deep into his eyes, and it’s only when you continue that Ben finally understands just how much you want him. He was planning on teasing you until the whole planet knew who was making you feel so needy, but the way you moan to him your craving for his cock sends him over the edge. Without warning, Ben pulls you until your chest is flush against his own, and before you can say anything else, he slowly inches his cock into your pussy, halting every few seconds to give you a chance to get used to the intrusion.

“Fuck me Ben, I n-need you to…fu-uck me.” Your voice barely comes out as a whisper, and it takes every ounce of focus and control in Ben’s system to not thrust into your heat quickly and fill you over and over again.

“I don’t wish to hurt you.” He lets go of your hair and wraps both of his arms around your back in an attempt to comfort you. But you can’t find it in yourself to care for whether he will leave you bruised and hurt. All you seem to want is to feel him everywhere, and you do so by wrapping your arms around his neck and shoving your face into the crook of his neck again.

“I want it to hurt…I want to feel you for days. I- I need it Ben.” You hope that he understands how truthful you are, but Ben remains still for a few seconds more, making you shake with desperate need for more. More of his kisses, his gaze, his touch, his thick cock carving your cunt to fit you perfectly.

“Please.” You plead one last time, and it must be all he needs to hear because in an instant, Ben is spreading his legs wider until his feet are planted firmly against the bed.

“I feel you will be the death of me, my darling.” You part your lips to respond to him but the world seems to fade away all of a sudden as Ben snaps his hips up against you and fills you completely. The force of his action sends you over the edge easily, coaxing the quickest of pleasures from your body in such a way that makes it difficult to hold onto that last sliver of control you had left over your mind and soul. You sigh heavily against his skin, not sure of relief or pain, but the moment is cut short when Ben is forcibly shoved out of your cunt with a strange sensation. Neither of you know what just happened, but you soon realize the response of your body to Ben’s desperate ministrations when he takes hold of his cock again to push into your cunt and feels just how wet his navel and your thighs now were.

“Did- did you just…” The shock on Ben’s features embarrasses you to no end, and you try to find an excuse to convey to him so he doesn’t think you’re as pathetic as a loth cat in heat, but all words fail you when you meet his eyes and see how far dilated they are. He must see worry etched on your features because he doesn’t give you a chance to think more of what just transpired and pushes his cock past your wet slit again. Whatever you’re about to say evaporates into thin air as you clench your core to get used to his size again, and before you know it, he’s fully sheathed in your tight walls, hard and hot as you always thought he would be.

“Maker…your cunt knows to whom it belongs already, doesn’t it sweetheart? It knows me…and I barely touched you.” Ben asks without looking away from you, arms slowly roaming the expanse of your body until you completely melt against him. He slips a hand around your upper back until he’s tugging the hair on the nape of your neck, his other arm circling your waist perfectly and holding you flush against him. When he ensures the tight grasp he has around you, he repositions himself again until his feet are flat against the sheets. Before you can respond to his question, which you noticed was laced with nothing but pride at having mastered your body in the span of only a few minutes, he snaps his hips against you once to give you a taste of what’s to come.

“Yes, I- I’m yours Ben. All yours…e-ever since I met you, I-” You’re searching for the proper words to whisper to him, but you come to the realization that he never intended for you to actually respond to him. With every syllable you manage to breathe against his neck, Ben thrusts his cock deep into your cunt, filling you deliciously time and again until you memorize the feeling of him as he brought you pleasure.

“Hmm?” A cocky smirk breaks out on his handsome features, and you wish with all your heart you can smack it away. Instead, you relish in the fact that Ben—sweet, quiet, and shy Ben—didn’t mind showing you this side of him. You never thought you’d ever come to the point in your relationship where you could hear such filthy declarations from him, let alone see him teasing you so openly. You snap out of the momentary spell he’s put you under when he slows down and brings you impossibly close to him until you can feel nothing but his cock hitting that sweet spot inside you that makes you see stars. Your thighs begin to shake when he doesn’t move, and as you attempt to sit up so you can take over, Ben shakes his head and tightens his hold around you.

“Please just-” You plead with him, praying to the maker that he can put you out of your misery and fuck you into the next moon already. He drags his fingers down your back and pushes your ass down against him, forcing you to roll your hips around his cock until your legs continue to violently shake. You can feel every ridge and protruding vein swipe deliciously across your walls, and you fight to take a deep breath so you don’t lose your mind over the feeling of him marking every inch of your heat with the wet, hard skin of his tip.

“I won’t ask again, sweet one. Tell me.” His voice is hoarse, unlike all the other times throughout the night when he whispered sweet nothings into your ear. You can’t help the shiver that runs across your skin at the sound of his tone, mostly because you never thought that your Ben would be this vocal and dirty during such an intimate moment. You thought he would be too shy to tell you what he desires, but the harder he pushes you down on him while thrusting his hips up into you, the more you understand that this was always the Ben you spoke with, he just needed a little bit of patience and love to return to whom he once was.

“Ever since I met you, I knew that…oh fuck, I knew that I could never be with anyone else. You- stars, please move Ben. I’m so full of you but- fuck…need to feel you everywhere. ‘Ve dreamt of giving you everything…and now I- I just…I can’t take it anymore.” When he doesn’t give any inclination of letting you go, you give into his embrace and wrap your arms around his shoulders, slowly leaving a trail of wet kisses across his neck and clavicle to urge him on. He squeezes your ass as he rolls your hips around, tilting his head to the opposite side to give you more access to the expanse of his skin. You sink your teeth into the juncture between his neck and shoulder, making him shove his cock harshly into your cunt unintentionally and sending you closer into his arms.

It’s in this moment that Ben wants nothing more than to reach out to your Force signature and feel you envelop him fully. But he’s reluctant to do so, not only because it’s been a decade since he’s done something so intimate, but also because he didn’t think he could share this part of himself with you just yet. You’ve been nothing but understanding ever since you welcomed him into your room, before then even, but he doesn’t want to test his luck. Something about the way you wrap yourself around him though sets his mind at ease. He may not be able to tell you now, but he got the sense that he would eventually reach a level of comfort with you where he wouldn’t worry about your reaction to such a secret.

For now, the knowledge that he only needed to kiss you to feel you melt into his arms would have to be enough. He’s been alone for so long, spent decades without feeling the touch of another. The last thing he wished to do was to complain about the limited way he can be with you. This was more than enough.

Ben throws his head back in ecstasy when you kiss the corner of his mouth and tug on his hair, silently asking him if everything was okay. One look at the pleasure engraved on your features and his mind is at ease once more. He can still feel you shaking with want above him, and it drives him mad with lust. To think that someone like you, someone who’s met others more fascinating than him, easily submitted to him pushes him over the edge and roams his hands across your back in an effort to feel you surrender to him.

“Oh sweet one, you truly have gone cockdumb for me. So good for me, so fucking exquisite.” He growls his need against your cheek, watching with fascination as you rubbed your skin against his beard the harder he shoved his cock into your wet cunt. He wants to go slow, relish in the tightness and welcoming heat of your pussy as it swallows him enthusiastically. But your desperation makes him forget his mission. Ben chuckles as you whine and whimper the rougher the hair of his beard mark your skin and neck, and he’s about to pull away to give you some respite when you reach out further to him and continue stroking him like your life depends on it.

“Yes, oh maker yes, I- I’ll be good. I promise…I’ll do anything you ask Ben.” Ben swears beneath his breath at the shameless tone of your voice as you let him do whatever he pleases with your body. Taking advantage of your momentary distraction, Ben unravels his arms from around your back and takes hold of the thin straps of your dress. You only have a second to realize you can’t feel his protective embrace around your tired form, and before you ask him why he let go of you, a loud ripping sound fills the room. Looking down, you notice that he’s pulled the top of your dress to shreds and shoved it down your chest until you were revealed to his hungry eyes.

In your line of work, you’ve grown used to the way your clients tended to eye your body as you walked by. You even thought you’d never get to feel the rush of pleasure coursing through your veins at the thought of being the object of desire for someone. But as you study Ben’s reaction to finally seeing your nude form, you suddenly feel too exposed to your liking and slowly let go of his shoulders to cover yourself. Ben is quicker though, and he drags your wrists away from your body before pushing them behind your back and holding them tightly in one of his palms.

“You beautiful star…and here I thought I- kriffing hells, I would need to kneel before you to get the faintest glimpse of…maker help me, of your desires.” Ben groans deeply as he leans forward and takes your nipple in his mouth. You can easily break free from the hold he has on your wrists, but choose against it, wanting to relish in how dominant and wanton this man has become for you. His tongue works magic on your pert nipples, and you work your hips harder onto his cock when his teeth tug softly on your hardened peak. It’s his turn to whimper beneath you, and you smile to yourself as he lets go and pays equal attention to your other breast. You look down again and watch as Ben hungrily marks your chest with his teeth, and you push yourself into his mouth to make sure he claims as much of you as possible.

“But I should have expected this, should have known you would bend to my will in an instant.” Ben whispers as he lays back down against the bed and brings you along with him. He must see the effect his voice and his words are having on you because soon after, he starts fucking up into you with abnadon, returning his other hand to your back and using your arms to control your movements more easily. He wants to come so kriffing badly but he holds back to feel you let go for him again. You can’t hold yourself up anymore and completely lose yourself to the plethora of sensations that were possible only through Ben. Nuzzling into his neck, you cry his name over and over again as you reach that familiar high once more, praying to the stars that he continues fucking you through your orgasm so you can think of nothing else but him.

“That’s it love, come for me again. Come on my cock, mark me with your sweet essence.” Ben kisses your forehead as he urges you to come for him, and even though he’s coaxed pleasure from you so easily before, he’s still surprised to feel your walls clench tightly around him soon after as your release washes over him. He fucks you through it, relishing in how violently your whole body shakes against him the more he prolongs your orgasm. When you beg and whine his name so he could at least slow down, Ben fights with himself against turning you around and fucking into you wihtout a care for anything else. He slows down to a stop but doesn’t pull out just yet, wanting to commit this moment to memory so he can return to it later as he touches himself to the thought of you giving every bit of yourself to him so freely.

His cock twitches the more your muscles spasm around him, and he hisses when you try to move off of him and sink deeper on his dick.

“B-Ben?” Your voice comes out barely louder than a whisper, and Ben worries for a moment that he may have gone a bit too far with you.

“Ahh, little one- you’re so exquisitely tight around me.” It’s not what he wants to say, but it is what escapes his lips when you fall back against his chest and your pert nipples rub against the damp hair peppering his chest.

“Keep going, don’t- don’t stop. Please.” You look into his eyes as you ask him to keep going, and Ben almost gives into your request when he locks his gaze with you and sees how genuine your pleading words are.

“But you m-must be sensitive. I don’t wish to-” The last thing he wishes to do is to stop, but he doesn’t want you to feel obligated to do anything else. When you lean down and take his lips in a heated kiss, Ben’s worries flutter away along and become replaced with a need unlike anything he’s ever felt before. You sneak your tongue into his mouth and fight to mark him as he’s done with you. Unlike before, when Ben would have pulled your hair to remind you who’s in charge, he allows you to do what you wish, knowing that he would control your body again in a few moments.

“I don’t care, ahhh I don’t. I just want to feel you, want your cock to fill me up till I- oh fuck, till I can’t feel anything but how perfect and hard and hot you feel in my pussy. Mark me, I want it Ben.” You break the kiss and gasp against his skin when you notice how pliant he’s become beneath you. Nipping at his neck, you relish the clear reddened marks slowly appearing everywhere you’ve attended to, the sudden need to see his skin glistening with your spit and teeth marks making you return to biting and licking him again.

“Have I not claimed every inch of your skin enough? Have I not already trained your body to recognize my touch…my lips…my cock?” Ben barely manages to respond, the sensation of your mouth claiming him making him impossibly hard inside your pussy. He moans in between every word he breathes out to you, fingers digging into your waist and back when you grow more bold and aggressive with your marking.

“No- it’s…that’s not- I need you to mark me. Mark me with your seed. Come inside me and claim me.”

Time seems to stop as soon as Ben registers what you’ve just asked of him. He doesn’t dare move a muscle as he watches you lean up and make contact with his shocked eyes.

“Little one, are you sure?” The question is whispered and you can’t help but think that it’s because Ben was trying to keep himself in check so he doesn’t breed you then and there. You let go of his neck to grab his hand, thanking the maker that he wasn’t fighting for dominance during such a moment. You take his fingers and trail them down your arm, and when they settle above the skin of your forearm, you push those digits and move them around until Ben feels the small chip hiding beneath heated and flushed skin. You swear you notice the faintest hint of disappointment on his features, and the thought that he truly wanted to fill you with his seed and breed you almost makes you come again.

“Gods yes…fuck your cum inside my cunt Ben, and fill me up.” You let go of his hand and tell him as you capture his lips in another searing kiss.

“Force help me, the mouth on you…it's dangerous. What a filthy fucking girl you’ve been sweetheart. And you are all mine.” Ben doesn’t give you any warning as he suddenly sits up and wraps your legs around his waist. You throw your head back and dig your nails into the hair at the nap of his neck as he roams his calloused palms up and down your back until they land on your thighs. It’s his turn to leave bruising marks on your shoulders, and when he’s satisfied with how far gone into pleasure he’s sent you, he hops off of the massage bed and makes his way towards your own bed.

“Yes.” You shut your eyes and surrender to him, excitement rushing through your veins when you feel him harden and grow heated inside your cunt with every step he takes.

“Mine to do with as I wish.” Ben commands as he holds you tightly against his chest, the need to feel every inch of you slide deliciously across him outweighing everything else.

“Please.” You plead again, wanting him to move quicker to your bed so he could fuck you like you’ve dreamt of for weeks on end.

“Mine to touch, mine to kiss, and mine to fuck when I please.” He smiles when he sees your skin erupt with goosebumps at his promising words, and he slides his hands down your back as he kneels on your bed until he softly lays you on your back. You let go of him, and stretch your arms across your sheets, looking at him through heavy-lidded eyes as he trails his hands over your glistening skin. He thrusts softly into your pussy and throws his head back when your walls flutter around his cock and pull him in deeper.

“Stars, you feel heavenly wrapped around my cock, so wet and ready to be fucked properly.” Ben sighs into the quiet room, returning his gaze to you once more when you dig your nails into the skin of his thick thighs to get his attention.

“Use me, fuck me like you’ve wanted.”

“Oh, I intend to little one.” He raises a curious eyebrow at your choice in words, knowing fully well that you were trying to get a rise out of him to get what you wanted, what both of you craved for so long. Leaning down against you until his arms rested on either side of your head, Ben mouths the softest of kisses on your forehead and down your cheeks until you’re smiling hazily at him.

“I assure you, I will not leave your bed until your cunt is drowning in my seed. Is that what you desire of me, love? You wish to be full of my cum?” Ben asks as he begins to plunge his cock harder into you, his dick growing impossibly harder when you wrap your arms around his back and pull him flush against you.

“Y-yes, gods yes Ben.” You claim against his throat, crying in pain and pleasure as that familiar heat grows in your lower stomach.

“Look at you, you're positively sinful.” His voice is strained as he picks up the pace, and he’s torn between shutting his eyes to focus on how warm you feel around him and opening them to memorize your beautiful expression as you come undone again. Looking down for a brief moment, Ben decides that he very much desires to look upon you as you let him use you, a part of him somehow still wanting to ensure that you were, in fact, writhing beneath him, and that this wasn’t another dream plaguing his lonely nights.

“Oh Ben, you're- you're so deep inside me. Your cock is stretching me so…gods, it's addicting. Can’t get enough of you…won’t ever- mhmm get enough of you.” You’re not sure if you’re making any sense to him, but you can’t find it in yourself to care when his cock hits all the right spots that force you among the stars.

“Good girl, good fucking girl…you're doing so well for me.” Again, the sound of his voice as he fights to speak turns you on way more than it should, and you mouth at whatever skin you can reach to show him how much you want him, how much you crave tasting him on your tongue every minute of every day.

“I'm so close already…please I- ahhh Ben, I want you to come with me. Need it, ohhhh so much.” You open your eyes for a second, and the sight that greets you will forever be etched in your mind’s eye.

Ben was furrowing his eyebrows, focused solely on you and nothing else as he drove his cock into your cunt so deep and fast that you could feel the tip of him hit your cervix precisely and consistently. The sound of skin slapping on skin and heavy grunts fills the room, pushing you impossibly closer to the edge faster than you thought possible. Ben bites into his lower lip when he notices the way you’re looking at him, and he swears for a moment that you were about to confess something to him he knew might pull him apart. You part your lips to breathe those three shameless words to him but hold back at the last minute, afraid it might ruin the moment and unintentionally push him away.

“I can't…can't hold back much longer, little one. Your cunt is begging for my seed, pulling me in deeper each time I sink into you. I can feel- oh sweet one, I can feel your walls fluttering around me. You are close, aren’t you?” He snaps his hips roughly against you over and over again until your body begins to shake underneath him. Ben growls into the night air when you suddenly cross your legs behind his back and push him into you until all he can feel is the sheer need you’re displaying for him.

“Ben, oh maker-”

“That's it, dear heart. Come for me, know this sensation…memorize how full you are now so you can't come without feeling my cock inside you.” Ben loses the last sliver of control he has on his mind when he looks down and sees you crying with shameless desperation for him. He wants to slow down for both of your sakes, but you fit too perfectly around him that he can’t decide whether he wants to burrow his way into your cunt or your soul.

“I- I’m…Ben-” You want to say so much. You want to tell him how long you’ve waited for this, how lonely you felt each time he walked out of your parlor with the unspoken promise of never seeing you again. You want to breathe to him how difficult it is for you to go a single day without the thought of his smile and his eyes, how you dream every night of submitting every beat of your heart to him. Instead, you pray his name like a benediction across his lips until you can’t voice your pleasure anymore, and with a particular thrust that forces the coarse hairs on his lower navel to slide perfectly across your clit, you fall apart on his cock and clench so harshly around him that he instantly falls over the edge with you.

“Oh darling, you are driving me mad with need. I- I burn for you, and now…fuck, now you will be mine.” It’s the last promise he commands on your flushed skin, and with a few more thrusts, Ben comes undone and sinks his cock as deep into your pussy as he can without hurting you. He feels you squeeze him tightly and a strike of lightning shoots down his spine when he feels you sink your teeth into his shoulder to hold back from screaming his name. He mirrors your action bites your neck as well, his balls twitching violently until he’s released his seed inside you and painted your tight walls with his cum.

The two of you remain wrapped in each other’s arms for a while after, neither of you wishing to part so much as an inch out of fear of this all becoming an extremely vivid dream. Ben pants with difficulty above you, and he remembers to hold himself above you just as his arms begin to give out. You notice what he’s doing before he gets off of you, and you twist your legs across his lower back to ensure that he remains where he is. The action accidentally pushes his cock further in your cunt, making the two of you hiss out of pain and pleasure at the oversensitivity coursing through your muscles.

When you’ve had enough time to return to yourself once more, you slowly massage his back and let go of his waist, knowing that he might not necessarily wish to cuddle with you after what you’ve done. Ben begins to pull away and you will your heart to remain silent so you don’t break apart in front of him. But instead of leaving, Ben smiles softly at you and leans down to capture your lips in a loving embrace. You part your mouth for him instantly, sighing in relief when he takes a page out of your book and roams his palms up and down your thighs to soothe you.

“Are you hurt? Was I- did I hurt you, my darling?” He asks worryingly, eyes quickly moving down your form and making note of all the bruises he’s left over your skin.

“No Ben, you- maker, you were perfect.” You shake your head and smile at him, chest clenching tightly at the thought of this man thinking that he can ever do something to make you uncomfortable.

“You are sure I didn’t-” He tries to ask again, but you don’t give him a chance and pull him down for another kiss. His body melts against you right away, and you smile when you feel his beard tickle your chin as he deepens the kiss. You’re not sure how long the two of you remain intertwined in each other, but when the need for air grows, you lay your head back against the sheets and look up at him with a teasing eyebrow.

“Yes…besides, I like it a little rough.”

“You are an incorrigible little vixen.” Ben shakes his head and chuckles when you shrug your shoulders and make a show of checking him out. He blushes a deep shade of red as soon as he feels your hand roam up and down his chest with a hungry look.

“I meant it when I said you can do whatever you want with me.” You break the silence, and pretend to ignore the small twitch of his cock at your declaration. Taking his hand into yours, you bring it up and kiss his palm to distract yourself from pushing him down on his back and riding him until he begs you to show him mercy.

“What?” You giggle when you look up and see the way Ben studies you, unable to decipher whether his expression was one of newfound interest in wanting to fuck you agian or judgement how much you crave him.

“Have you any idea of the effect those words have on me?” He asks as he twists your hand in his own and lays the softest and most loving of kisses over your knuckles.

“Maybe,” you respond cheekily with a roll of your hips, making Ben grunt and rest his forehead against your own. He meets your movement with a slow thrust and shivers once he recognizes the mess he’s made of the two of you. Mostly you…

“Hmm, I will never get enough of this…enough of you. I thought this burning would calm once I have you but,” he stops mid-sentence to nudge your nose with his own, only continuing when he looks down and sees sheer bliss written across the smile reaching your eyes.

“But now I know.” Ben doesn’t finish the rest of his thought, a part of him wanting to still tease you and see if you were actively listening to him or just humoring his words while you surrendered to his hands.

“W-what?” You don’t realize how difficult you find it to breathe until Ben’s low, gravelly voice washes over your clavicle and down your sternum with each wet kiss he leaves.

“Now I know I must have you whenever I can,” Ben declares as he sucks on one nipple, not giving you a chance to escape him and pinching the other in between his thumb and index finger. You arch your back into him, pushing your chest against his aggressive touches to relish the sensations rising across your body once more.

“And what will happen if- ahhh stars, if you don’t?” You whimper beneath him as soon as his teeth close over your hardened peak a little harsher than you expected.

“My heart may burst.” He declares those simple words with such assurance that your heart skips a beat at how terrifyingly honest he’s being with you.

“You r-really want me this much Ben?” You can’t help but ask, a part of you still afraid that he only laid with you out of loneliness and not because he only desired to be comforted and touched by you.

“I believed my desires were etched upon my face as clear as the twin suns. Clearly I was mistaken. Sweetling, not a moment goes by without the mere thought of your smile plagues my mind.” He stops his quest to kiss every inch of you in order to look into your eyes to show you that he means every word he’s said thus far. Ben notices the tears slowly forming in your eyes at his confession, and he smiles lovingly at you before leaning down and kissing the tears away.

“In that case, you can have me anytime you want. I’ll never say no to you Ben, never.” You try to set his mind at ease so he doesn’t think you’re growing too emotional to his liking, but Ben kisses you instead to set your mind at ease.

“Dearest, you know not how those words fill me with joy.”

“I’m glad I can make you happy so easily.” You turn away from him and get distracted by all the reddened marks you left across his neck and shoulders.

“To look in your eyes is to behold a whole galaxy. It is as simple as that.” Ben purrs softly against your lips, and you shudder at the ease with which he can reveal to you such intimate and vulnerable desires to you.

“Maker, you really do have a way with words, don’t you?” You giggle when he kisses the corner of your lips before nudging your nose again with a breathtaking smile that reaches his ears.

“Only for you, sweet one. Only for you.”

Ben sighs heavily as he feels you melt completely beneath him after a while, and as you slowly give yourself to sleep, he reluctantly pulls away to look upon your peaceful features again. So much has happened during the past few months, the past few years if he was being truly honest, but the longer he gazes at you, the calmer his heart feels because never in his entire life did he think he could be capable of feeling such emotions again.

Never in his entire life did he think he could find his heart again…

And in such a place where it wasn’t meant to be.

Tagging those who showed interest: @metalarmsandmanbuns @purple-mango @a-bang-for-your-bucky @zombiesnips-blog

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louroth · 11 months

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Well, well, well. Would you look at what the cat dragged in. (it's me, Lou!)

The time is here, and oh man, do I have a lot to say! Ever since this post was posted on my personal tumblr, on the fifth of may, I have been working like a machine on all things OUROBOROS. I had originally planned for this to just be a progress report/ announcement on what I will be working on now that I am free of the shackles of work, but, somehow, I managed to finish all bullet points, and more. So, let's get into it!

First off, the title. Ouroboros becomes all capitalized OUROBOROS. Idk. It's neat. Next!

Art. Whew. I didn't think I could draw like this anymore- drawing has been more of a struggle than writing has been, forever, always- it was something I really strived to become good at, for a time. And I gave up. Only to pick it up again when I started ouro, and ever since I released that pressure, something just clicked and I have been churning out art like never before. I don't know if this is a fluke, a stroke of luck or if all that hard work I once did slaving away with menial art practice… but I'm grateful nonetheless. (A note on official RO art: I lost my ipad pencil somewhere on the lawn, lmao. I haven't been able to get a new one yet, so there is a slight delay here.) I am hoping that I get to make some commissions too, in the near future. Visit the forum to see some works in progress (amongst them, Yor's RO portrait!)

Onto the hellscape that is coding! I have been growing more proficient with CSS and html with the help of the ones that run so that we can walk; I have studied and researched and tested and tinkered until my eyes crossed, finding my way into this medium with the incredible guidance of the giants of whose shoulders I stand on. I will talk about this in detail on a later date. So I think it's finally time to reveal that yes, I am working on a twine version of ouro. I will develop it in tandem with choicescript; the porting over from one to the other isn't the herculean task I thought it would be.

Why am I doing this? Because I need to have a save system. I am continuing to write the whole alpha draft in choicescript in hopes that CoG will announce the ability to have a native save/checkpoint system, but if that doesn’t happen, I can’t publish this story without one. Unfortunately, I am not willing to code in a savesystem in choicescript myself, because this will be a large game, with far too many variables for that to be sustainable. Trust me, no one is more disappointed by that fact than me. If it comes to the point that twine publishing will be what I do, I will set my sights on writing a smaller game for hosted games.

Now the meatier announcements!

New Socials!

Tumblr: You are looking at it! This is the new, exclusively OUROBOROS blog where I will share all announcements and sneak-peeks, and future updates. I worked together with the dev of the theme and made it oh, so pretty and functional. Please check out their portfolio here, if you are ever in the market for sprucing up your (desktop version) of tumblr. They were a pleasure to work with. Amongst other things, it has a gorgeous header (again, only if you visit on web and not mobile) where I am showcasing fanart and official art. Go check it out! This month, I am showcasing a truly breathtaking art from KAIRELART, and you can find the full art here, or follow the links in the “FEATURED ARTIST” tab in the top bar.

I hope you enjoy this new haven for OUROBOROS! I will be answering questions once a week (saturday) and ramping up as I adapt to this new schedule, more on that further below.

My old tumblr, honeypeabrain, will revert back to being my personal blog. Feel free to keep following me there, but know that it will be inundated with shitposts, crass humor and the occasional poetry dump and personal post. You’ve been warned!

Discord!

By the good graces, this was ROUGH to set up. Working with discord bots is akin to wrangling code, and it was well and truly, a war. But with the help of many, it is finally all done and ready for anyone to join and talk to me and others about OUROBOROS and anything else between heaven and earth.

I will also greatly appreciate if any future bugs and feedback are submitted through here, so I can keep easier track of it. Come join us! (18+ ONLY.)

Patreon & Ko-Fi

Yep! Ko-fi is just a place to toss me a coin if you wish to help me towards the goal of new PC parts to make testing easier, or to just show appreciation for those that have it to spare. Patreon however, already has a multitude of posts and will be a hub for exclusive NSFW sidestories that you get to vote on, loredives and extensive sneak peeks, Q&A’s, polls and weekly dev logs.

Right now, there are only two tiers, but I expect it to grow as my story does. I have many plans, but I am going at a steady pace.

Amongst tiered content, there is a (free) NSFW story with female MC and Idren to read there right now, if you want to check it out! I am mgoing to post it on tumblr and the adult thread here over the weekend.

NOTE: I stupidly didn't realize that patreon had a review process after I pressed launch, which I did just a few minutes ago. Sigh. I am going to post the short on tumblr and the adult forum thread as soon as I get to it.

It is not mandatory by any means, so if you do choose to support me, you have my eternal gratitude as these places will be the sole source of income for me.

Onto writing:

The best news out of this whole bunch is that I have worked so hard on editing and writing, that in the past month I have all but finished a two chapter update! I have a chunk of about 5-6 thousand words left to write, and I am going to buckle down over the weekend to see it through. I wanted to have it done so badly for today, but I lost three days of writing time last week due to still being weighed down with work. I hope it isn’t too disappointing to have to wait until monday for the demo update! I am going to post a link to an as-I-write updated demo on Patreon and Discord, if you want to see the ugly face of raw wip drafts. Otherwise I will post the demo update here on Monday with a comprehensive post!

And now! the biggest news is… from now on, I am writing full time!

This is what I have been tossing and turning about every night ever since Easter. It started as a silly idea while talking to some friends and family about how I was looking for a change in career. And then, little by little, that idea whittled down to a plan, carefully carved by my partner and his whispers of a happy future, a finished dream project, and something to be proud of until the day I wither and die.

Somewhere between then and now, I grasped a tiny sliver of bravery and held on for dear life.

I quit my job as a teacher, and instead of accepting a cushy office job, I started behaving as if OUROBOROS and writing was my work (for all the moments I could afford). I have researched and tried different methods from week to week, and although I was still tired from work, I felt like I was onto something that could build into a sustainable future.

I have no doubts that this journey will be bumpy and long, but sometimes all it takes is to take that first step, and do it with determination. It might all crash and burn and fail in a spectacular way, or with a whimper, but then I will know that I have tried. I will know that I gave myself the chance to be who I want to be, work on what means so much to me.

And that’s it. I think the hardest part of formulating this post (I’ve written about 50 versions of it!) is getting to the point; the kernel of what makes it so special to me. So, in my heart of hearts, what I'm trying to tell you is that I'm gonna give it my all- and while I know the road to having a sustainable career in writing is rough and ever winding, I do know for sure that I am ready for a challenge, to pour my heart and soul into it until the day I rush out of the office screaming IT IS DONE. IT IS DOOOOONE!!!

If you decide to join me, I will treasure your company like a lantern in the dark. Hand in lovable hand, let’s fucking go.