Tumgik
#it takes a minimum of 2 tries before they actually FIX it
brehaaorgana · 4 months
Text
What if I just become an annoying ADHD money blogger sometimes
#adhd adult money liveblogging
If you have problems saving money (especially emergency savings money) because you always spend it on too many impulse purchases, or take money out of your savings to cover your fun money:
you need to open a savings account with a new bank. The more impulsive you are, the more I recommend a small credit union or online only bank, or a really local bank. Someone whose online fund transfers to other banks takes three whole business days, so you literally can't just instant transfer money from savings to your checking account to spur of the moment buy things. If you're afraid this defeats the point of an emergency savings fund in the case of, well, an emergency, set up a small checking account with a minimal amount at this bank too, and just set aside the debit card somewhere you won't frequently use because it won't have much money until you pull it from emergency savings and put it in the checking account.
Look for one with a high APY relative to having basically no deposit minimum (mine is like 3%) and no minimum deposit or monthly fees. The APY is basically when bank sometimes pays you money for not spending money. It will be like, cents at first. Change in the sofa cushions. But over time, it will be more. Don't worry about it. It's just surprise money for later. Not a lot, mind you. But you're a competitive winner and every cent they give you FREE is a success to zap your brain with dopamine. (Eventually if you have enough money you can do this by like, investing in shit or buying CDs and they just give you MORE MONEY. BUT!!! BABY STEPS.)
This is crucial: if you have some kind of direct deposit paycheck set up, see if you can SPLIT the direct deposit between multiple accounts. The company my job uses to pay people allows us to choose between depositing a fixed dollar amount to certain accounts (with "remainder of paycheck balance" being automatic for one account), OR depositing a percentage of my paycheck to certain accounts. (Percents of a paycheck tend to be higher to start). If you don't get paid this way, figure out a good date to set a recurring transfer from your checking to your savings for an amount so it won't sit in your spendy account long. The goal is to pretend like you just actually never had the savings money in that paycheck. Poof. Gone. Disappeared. It got saved before you became aware of the money.
Feel free to start with a small amount. It can be $5 or whatever. Once you start doing this for a few paychecks look at your money. If you're not genuinely struggling to stay afloat after 2-3 months and are still comfortable, try increasing the number a little. Repeat as needed.
Now you've saved money. 🎉
This is genuinely how I managed to save money more consistently than anything else I've ever tried. Savings money goes in the secret money account. 🤷🏽‍♀️ Incredibly silly but it works.
29 notes · View notes
lucero-is-here · 10 months
Text
Headcanons: Celine Georges
Requested by:
Tumblr media
Celine:
Tumblr media
Don’t know the most about her but anyways:
1 - she has thus one instinct where if someone approaches her from behind, she instantly turns around and punches them either in the face or gut. When she first met Arthur Wright, he had approached her when she was working on something. She turned back and instinctively punched him in the nose out of fear. She is still sorry about it and still apologises to him about it if they talk.
2 - she’s not scared of anything! Except for spiders. A spider laid eggs in one of her creations once and she began to fear spiders and hate them from that moment onwards
3 - dress? NAH SHE’S WEARING PANTS EVERYTIME- She’d show you a dress she has, only to reveal that it’s actually a pair of pants .
4 - she eats sandwiches a lot- they are easy to make to her, and are really easy to eat. So sandwiches are kinda her favourite food.
5 - she has oil stains on a lot of her clothes- at one point she simply gave up trying to prevent getting more oil stains on her clothes since she knew someway somehow oil stains would appear.
6 - she burns any bug she sees. She saw a cockroach? BURN IT. She saw a spider? BURN IT. A maggot? BURN IT. Butterfly? Oh they can go free-
7 - fear of bugs. She is horrified of bugs, which explains the previous headcanon. She doesn’t mind butterflies as much though.
8 - AMAZING SPICE TOLERANCE- I DON’T NEED TO SAY MORE-
9 - okay she’s bisexual…But also asexual and I forgot how to say it- but she likes woman more, she has a girlfriend.
10 - tools are always on hand. She has a lot of her tools with her in case of anything. She’s very fast to fix everything.
11 - does a lot of inspections on her inventions. She wants to make sure her inventions are working and won’t break.
12 - has a lot of pride in her inventions. She spends a minimum of a few days on small projects, while big projects can take up more than a few months to make sure they are in the best condition she can possibly get them too.
13 - she can’t swim- she has tried swimming before, and the most she can do is find ways to stay afloat as long ad possible- she’s trying to learn how to swim though.
14 - she hates heels. She hated everything about them. She never understands how people can walk or even run in heels. She’s tried wearing heels before, and absolutely hated it. It made her feet hurt so much and she fell down so many times-
15 - she can be a bit reckless sometimes. She sometimes speaks or acts without thinking. She usually doesn’t regret it since she gets her point through though, but she does regret it if the other party is hurt by her words.
16 - what’s sleep? She only sleeps when she gets time. She just passes out onto her sofa and goes to sleep, wakes up a few hours later and goes back to work. Few hours meaning at most 5 hours.
17 - really short nails. She doesn’t bother caring for them, she just cuts them. Her hands are always bound to get dirty, and something is always finding it’s way under her nails. So the shorter her nails, the better. But not too short-
18 - really rough hands…some people compared her hands to sandpaper before. She personally thinks it’s worth it, since they’ve only become so rough with how much time she spends working on inventions.
19 - she reads a lot of books. A lot of books. She also reads the newspaper daily. The books is to either learn more or gain inspiration for more inventions. While for newspaper, to see if there are any issues she can make an invention to solve said issue, and sometimes to catch up with what’s happening and any kind of gossip going on.
20 - she tried making her own jetpack once. That failed. She made the straps too weak, and they broke and the jetpack had flown off into the sky.
21 - she likes staring at the night sky. After a really really hard day of work, she sometimes climbs to the roof of her home and just stares up into the night sky. She tries counting the stars, but always runs out of time or patience. She considered breaking off part of the roof and replacing it with tempered glass so she can see the night sky from her room, and ended up doing it. But she still climbs onto the roof a lot.
22 - sweet foods? Sign her up. She eats a lot of sugar sometimes- it gives her the energy she needs to work on inventions and do the necessary designs and math for them. She likes hard candy the most. She likes jawbreakers, because they always last the longest.
23 - she’s strong. She has a lot of strength- used to carry her materials for inventions. She has lifted people up before with no issues too!
24 - solo worker. She doesn’t like having anyone work with her, and prefers to be by herself. She hates the idea of someone stealing her ideas, or someone messing up her workplace. Hence working alone is her favourite.
25 - if she lets you into her workshop, you are not allowed to touch anything. Everything is where it is for a reason and Celine has a pattern behind everything she has placed. They are all organised in someway or another so do not touch, or move anything.
That’s all for now- if I can think of more a part 2 will come up.
13 notes · View notes
nonkosherian · 11 months
Text
Off With His Head!
So I put that I am a game designer in my Bio and then never actually post about game design 😅
Well I have a game coming out soon so let's change that!
This is about my game soon to be on Kickstarter (the plan is to have the preorder started before the end of the year). It’s called “Off with His Head!” and is set during the French Revolution. A fully cooperative game where you conspire to throw King Louis to the angry mob outside before he gets the idea to do the same to you. 
But it wasn't always a historical game. In the beginning it wasn't even a cooperative game. Heck it barely had a theme in the first iteration! This is going to be a story about how it got from being a goofy little idea in my head to the point where it was polished enough to be spotted in the wild by a publisher and it became a game you can (soon) buy.
This story started when I was looking at a game design contest. It was held by Button Shy, and the goal was to make a game that did not use a table and had 18 cards or less as the only components. 
I started thinking about a game where you stand in a circle and pass cards from hand to hand. Each player would always end up with the same number of cards after any given passing of cards. Then working from that mindset I tried to think of a reason for people to be passing cards around. I settled on the Players needing to collect 3 of the same card in hand at the same time to win. And I called it “Here Have This.” A Friendly take that game.
Tumblr media
This is one of my first cards. This whole game was thrown together in Google Draw in an afternoon. Always remember “MVP, Minimum Viable Product” it doesn't have to be pretty, it just needs to work.
This game was in the final 10 or so of that contest but did not make it to the finish line. I was a little put out by that at the time, but looking back on it even a few weeks later I had to admit this game had some major flaws.
For starters LOOK AT HOW MUCH TEXT IS ON THAT CARD! That’s waaaaaaay to much to read and keep in your head. Funnily enough this first problem would not be corrected until the update after next. I think I was like “I will find a more concise way to say this later, the card is fine.” then the Narrator said “He didn't find a more concise way to say it.” 
The bigger problems were that 1) it was very possible given the structure of the game that one player could be completely ignored for the entire game. And 2) it felt entirely random who won because it was almost impossible to plan ahead in any meaningful way.
Tumblr media
This is King Maker!
So the next big update would fix those 2 issues. Because I was no longer under the restrictions of the contest I could use the table again! And I was no longer limited to using 18 cards or less. So I added a new card called a “Door” that sat in front of each player. If the door was on the “open” side, you could pass a card to that player. Once they got a card they flipped the door to the “Closed” side. If all doors were closed then everyone flipped the doors back to “open.” This was clunky but it did fixt the issue where players were being skipped/ignored all game. 
Now to solve the planning problem I changed the victory condition so that 2 players won. The “King” and the person who made them King or “KIng Maker.” The idea would be that players can now “collude” with each other in order to win the game.
This version had lots of issues in general. Top among them being that it was still a little too random feeling for most players. I can’t remember who suggested it but someone put the idea in my head for a “robot” player at the table that everyone was trying to make “win.” And so the next big update was born!
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Oh look! I finally split this card in half! I remember splitting lots of cards that got too complicated, not just this one. (Heck I’m not showing you that the Assassin used to be more complex than what you see here, and half of that card’s text got split off into its own thing.)
The “Door” in the last version were way to fiddly, so I replaced them with “Chairs” the idea being that everyone was pushing people (cards) into chairs around the table, trying to influence the hand of the “Prince” (the Robot player I added to the game) so that he could be the winner of the game. The way Chairs helped improve the experience was that you would put the card passed to that player on the Chair card. Then when all the Chairs were full everyone would take the card in their chair into hand. This had the positive side effect of leaving a few cards in play in the middle of the round, so people could see how the cards were moving around the table a bit more clearly but it still left most information hidden.
This bit with the Robot and Chairs was a real game changer! It finally felt like I had something that (for the most part) worked and that I could tinker with and improve. Not just “rip the guts out and try something new” as is often the case in game design. 
This also added a “Clock” to the game. After each round the clock would tick closer to midnight, if the Prince did not become King by then the Players would lose. Some cards gave you more time, and others moved time forward faster.
There was a problem that was spotted with this iteration of the game that I was about to fix. The issue was that when it came time for the Prince (the robot) to play a card he would always play to the person on his left. This made things predictable in a not fun way. I had a plan to fix it but just before I made the change I had a moment of total blind luck! A publisher happened to be at a testing event and liked the game! After talking with him I added my “Prince Fix” and got to work on a version that I could sell.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
This was now “Off With His Head!” The basic rules and goals were still the same, but how it was framed was totally flipped. Now the Robot was the King of France, and the goal was to have the angry mob kill him while you and your friends snuck away. The “Clock” was replaced with a “Guillotine,” and once the “test cut” is done someone is going to die!
The “Prince Fix” is the little numbers and arrows you see on the cards. They dictate how far and in what direction the King will try to play the card. This makes how the king plays cards less predictable.
Honestly it was a lot of fun having 20+ tabs open on Wikipedia trying to find people and organizations that mapped onto the game mechanics I had already built. I also tried to include as many women as I could because I feel they get left out of most historic narratives. (also fun French Revolution fact, lots of lady Spies in France at the time.)
Tumblr media
And now here is a little preview of how the final cards look in the hands of an actual artist! 
Feel free to ask me anything about this design. It’s been a long road but I hope I’ve shown you that a game can fall on its face a dozen times before it finally starts to walk and run on its own.
5 notes · View notes
eroticcannibal · 1 year
Note
I got a medical question and if u got time love your opinion on it. for years I’ve had nausea and something I’ve been able to do to fix it is to not eat in the mornings until 11. (I went to the doctors and nothing was helping/figuring out why but this genuinely took me from getting nauseous everyday to almost once a week. And not just nauseous in mornings if I ate when I first woke up I was more likely to get a stomach even at like 3. Why? Who knows) But recently I started a medication for something entirely different and the meds are an appetite suppressant. I don’t have to take it with food (at first I was on meds that I had to take with food and not only did they not work as well I had to eat a ton of food or id get all loopy). I still have the thing where if I eat before 11 I’ll get a stomachache either right away or later but I keep accidentally skipping my first meal and it’ll be close to 2pm and all I have to eat that day is a couple of apples. It’s been really fucking with me actually because all of a sudden I’ll be starving and kinda useless for a while until I eat and digest some. I’m going to try and just eat smaller meals through out the day. My question is do u have any other recommendations for making sure I eat enough and do u know how much a person is supposed to eat? I’m only asking because for a couple days I was eating around 2 meals per day by accident and then it all hit me at ounce and I had a terrible day that only got better after I ate literally everything in my sight. When I tried to google this all I got was dieting tips lmao
Ok yes I can help here! So first rip I am also dealing with eating nausea and lack of appetite and it sucks.
MEAL REPLACEMENT DRINKS. or any kind of fancy supplement drink. Just anything that's got Something Extra in it. Drinking your calories counts you don't *have* to eat. Even milk will do. I swear by milkshakes if someone is ill and can't keep food down.
Also nibly snacks. Stuff you can keep in your pocket and mindlessly munch on. Cus then its more a habit than intentionally eating.
As for how much you need to eat, thats maths, and maths sucks. 2000 calories should be your absolute minimum if you do fuck all all day like my cripple ass does. I like my new fitbit cus it does the maths for me and then if I like, go out, it tells me how much extra I need to eat. I'm sure there's a way of actually working out how much you need yourself but! Thats maths! So I dont know!
5 notes · View notes
todoscript · 3 years
Photo
Tumblr media
SEQUEL TO  “don’t forget it”
SYNOPSIS: One week after accidentally blowing you off on your date, Bakugou Katsuki seeks your forgiveness.
pairing: bakugou katsuki x fem!reader
genre: fluff, very little angst
word count: 5.4k+
warnings: none really accept maybe a character sustaining an injury
author’s note: hellooooo this is a very very very late part 2 of my don’t forget it drabble that many people asked for! i hope this lived up to your expectations and was worth the wait!
Tumblr media
Since the events that led you to leave Bakugou’s room in a fit of bitterness after attempting to penetrate that thick head of his, he hadn’t been able to speak to you for a week.
It goes without saying he did his best to chase you down the hallway from his room and toward the elevator the moment he realized his faults. But at the stink eye you shot him through the minimizing slit of the elevator doors sliding into place, he knew he had no right to reconcile with you after pulling a stunt like that. Nor did he think you’d want to spare him any more words to begin with. It was clear you were done arguing with him.
“C’mon man, it’s probably best to let her cool down before you try to make up with her,” was the advice Kirishima offered when Bakugou returned to his room, disgruntled as he heavily fell back into his seat next to the desk. He did the bare minimum to acknowledge his friend’s words with a grunt before resuming tutoring the redhead, his method of teaching suddenly harsher than how it began thanks to his soured mood. He lapsed the day away by pounding Kirishima with problems upon problems against that hard noggin of his, both literally and figuratively.
At the very least, Kirishima earned himself a passing grade on their exam as a result of his hard work and their rigorous tutoring sessions. But what followed Bakugou’s and your relationship was still undetermined.
Days later and you were relentless in giving him the cold shoulder.
Bakugou was met with nothing but empty glances and blatant disinterest whenever he crossed your path. It felt like the wall you slotted between him grew another layer at each encounter, your defenses so impenetrable, it could give Kirishima’s quirk a run for its money. He couldn’t so much as utter a word in your direction without you effectively dodging every possible interaction in favor of joining another conversation nearby.
At first, Bakugou shrugged it off, calling your “childish attitude” unwarranted for something he thought was incredibly trivial. In his eyes, it was just an ordinary date at some run-of-the-mill restaurant he just happened to suggest to you because he took a liking to their spicy food. Not like it was some fancy dinner reservation serving caviar on dry toast beside a pretty, city night skyline. To him, it was nothing special.
However, as the week continued to roll by, it became clear to him how much he hurt you due to his selfishness. In a hangout with the Bakusquad, he learned that you apparently told Mina, along with the rest of the girls, everything during one of your girls’ nights. Which included the events prior to your heated argument in Bakugou’s dorm. And Mina, being just as peeved as you were at how Bakugou stood you up that day, had to let the blond know of the damage he’d done.
.
.
“I swear, Bakugou Katsuki, I know you can be an asshole sometimes—”
“Make that all the time,” Sero quietly adds in the middle of Mina’s rant while he lounges backward on Kaminari’s bed. If it wasn’t for his current dilemma, Bakugou would have elbowed him in the back of the head.
“—but this is crossing the line!” she finishes. Her arms are thrown exaggeratedly over her chest. The amber surrounded by the black scleras of her eyes points a beady look at the ash-blond crisscrossed on the floor between Kirishima and Kaminari.
“Poor girl sat there for hours waiting for you, only to find out she got blown off because you couldn’t even properly check your reminders!” She paces back and forth in the room, feet excessively stepping across the floor as she’s engulfed by the emotions she feels for her friend. “What’s worse? She comes back and finds out you’ve been doing your own thing with Kirishima the whole time!”
“Hey! It’s not like we were playing around! We were actually having a very serious study grind, thank you very much,” the redhead immediately clarifies. Though his explanation doesn’t alleviate Bakugou’s case in the slightest, who pounds his palms against the surface of the table they’ve gathered around.
“Look. I fucking get it, Ashido. I screwed up, okay?! Now what the fuck do you want me to do about it?!” he exclaims, anger overpowering his voice, but it does little to deter Mina.
“Fix it, obviously!” she quips back with equal fierceness, leaning in eye level with Bakugou.
“And how do you propose I do that, Raccoon Eyes? Hah?” Repositioning his elbow to rest on the table, he leans his cheek against his hand. “Y/n won’t even let me within five fucking feet in front of her and you still expect me ‘fix this’?”
Despite the situation weighing heavily on his shoulders, no immediate answer is bestowed upon him. That is, except the obnoxiously loud crinkle of a chip bag popping open next to Bakugou that cleaves into the scene like a record scratch. As if unable to read the mood in his own room, Kaminari fishes a chip to throw in his mouth, stirring the awkward silence into tension.
“Wow, Bakugou. I know you’re bad with girls and all, but you really messed up this time,” he remarks. His voice is slightly muffled as he munches his chips, continuing to wrinkle the bag for more. It incites a vein to swell on Bakugou’s forehead. He amasses all the willpower within him not to blast the bag of chips to ash, and the boy alongside it.
“If you dunce faces are just gonna sit here and throw salt in my wound then I’m outta here.”
“No, wait!” Kirishima catches Bakugou’s wrist before he fully lifts himself off the floor. “Come on, Bakugou, I’m sure we can think of something! We just need to put our heads together! Right, guys?” he assures. Finding it hard to deny his friend’s hardened conviction, Bakugou gives Kirishima the benefit of the doubt, albeit with slumped shoulders and a tentative raise of his brow as he slowly sits back down.
“Right! Everyone, let’s get some brainstorming done!” Mina yells encouragingly.
The atmosphere of Kaminari’s room is consumed by moderately thoughtful silence for the next ensuing minutes. A few hums pass, followed by an exchange of contemplative looks as four of the five rack their heads together to uncover a solution. The one in need of help only hunches in his seat, waiting with mild disinterest.
“Oh hey, don’t we have hero training with All Might tomorrow?” Sero is the first to comment, scooting to the edge of the blond’s bed.
“Yeah. So?”
“He said we were going to work on group exercises this time around. You know, teamwork and stuff,” he explains further.
At that, Mina snaps her fingers, the work of a brilliant idea flickering in her head. “Sero, that’s it! Tomorrow, during training, we’ll just form a group together with Y/n! After all, she’ll have to talk to Bakugou if you two are on the same team!” She claps her hands in front of her, her enthusiasm rippling through her body and shown energetically with each raise of her voice. “Then, while the rest of us ‘split up’ to cover more ground, that will be your chance to make everything better with Y/n! It’s genius!”
“You missed one fucking crucial detail, Pinky,” Bakugou gruffs. “That will only work if Y/n doesn’t join another group. The moment she sees I’m on yours, she’s not even going to hesitate making a u-turn.”
“Worry not~ I’ll just text all the girls except Y/n about the plan later and ask them to help sort everyone out!” She solves the problem with relative ease—quick as a click of her phone lighting up and finger sliding open to her messages.
“Uh, another thing though.” Kirishima raises his hand to spare his concern. “All Might says we’ll be splitting into groups of five at most, but there’s already five of us here.”
There’s a brief moment of deadpanning until Mina speaks casually. “Oh, that’s right. Kaminari. Take one for the team and make sure to join another group, ‘kay?” She settles without batting a lash.
Kaminari almost chokes on a mouthful of chips. “H-Huh?! What?! Why me?!!” he sputters.
“Because you’ve been eating chips this entire time and haven’t contributed to anything.”
“Hey, I offered the room, didn’t I?!” He tries justifying but is inevitably rejected by Mina’s wagging finger.
“Ah-ah, no complaints! Besides, it’s only one day of training. If we want this dilemma between Bakugou and Y/n fixed then we all have to play our part, got it?” Mina finalizes with a firm point of her finger nearly grazing the tip of the blond’s nose as he leans back to avoid it, eyebrows scrunched in discontent at the role he’s been reduced to.
“Alllllright!” Kirishima springs from his seat with outstretched arms and tightened fists. “Operation: Get Y/n to Forgive Explosion Boy is underway!”
“Dude, that’s a terrible name!” Sero laughs but rises from the bed to join the redhead’s cheer alongside Mina, the group already in high spirits.
Despite rolling his eyes at their swell of confidence, Bakugou does not object to the state of things. As crazy as it sounds, one could almost decipher the cusp of a grin pulling the seams of his lips as a possible sign he’s actually all for this extravagant little plan. Quite a first for Bakugou, but then again, there’s not much else he can do in this situation except rely on his pack of chumps.
Meanwhile, Kaminari grumbles something beneath the salty grit between his teeth.
“Alright, can you all get out of my room now?”
.
.
The scowl etched on your face carries a strong air of disdain that dampens the mood around your teammates considerably. Well, no one should be surprised. With Bakugou standing across from you, staring into the void of your expression, it’s to be expected that you wouldn’t be happy with this outcome.
No, “unhappy” doesn’t quite do your circumstance justice. You are beyond livid.
You feel your eyebrow twitch as you try quivering your lips to form a tinge of a smile. Unfortunately, all that quickly falls apart when you suddenly recall the disaster of last week, triggered by an accidental glance at Bakugou’s mug.
Trying to simmer down, you release a mental sigh amidst the turmoil boiling inside you.
Okay, maybe you’re over-exaggerating. Maybe you’re still just a bit too bitter for your own good and letting your emotions get to you. But in a class of twenty or some students, how did you end up in a group with the one person you were actively trying to avoid?
The moment All Might gave everyone the go-ahead to form their teams for today’s training exercise, you swiftly made a beeline toward two particular star students. Midoriya and Todoroki.
It was simple really. Your experiences throughout the school year told you Bakugou planned on staying away from his rivals when it came to teamwork, regardless of whether you’re there or not. He’s a competitive ass whose goal is to beat anyone he deems a threat in his climb to be the number one hero. It’s only logical you partner with people he adamantly dislikes to evade him.
Yet it seems fate has other plans for you today. By the time you found yourself pacing over to the two students you had in mind, they’d already gone and picked their own group members, forming teams before you could even ask.
Your nose wrinkles like you’ve taken a whiff of something rancid. Or, to be more specific, something fishy. Hooking an arm around Mina’s elbow, you drag the pink-haired girl off to a corner somewhere while tilting your head back at the three other boys.
“Ex. Cuse. Us.” Your words sound as stiff as cardboard. It comes out in practically a hiss when your eyes cross Bakugou. Once you’re positive you’re out of earshot, you whip your head at Mina.
“Mina, what the hell? When you dragged me over here to form a group with you you didn’t tell me he’d be there,” you groan. Childish and petty as you may sound, you just couldn’t fathom the idea of confronting the boy so soon.
Mina holds her hands out, ready to rationalize the whole ordeal. “C’mon Y/n, this is actually an advantage for us! With us four plus you on our team, we’re sure to knock the rest of the other guys out during training today! I mean we showed pretty good teamwork together at the sports festival, didn’t we?”
Steadying your gaze, you hold a finger below your chin as you slowly buy into the explanation. The reasoning is there. It’s hard to argue against a case like that, fully aware that being on the same team as explosion boy will easily snag good results for you and your party. ‘Cause as much of an arrogant jerk as he is, you have to admit Bakugou Katsuki knows his way around hero action like the back of his grenade gauntlets.
“Besides it’s not like you could avoid him for the entire school year. I mean, you two are in the same class. It was only a matter of time before you had to—”
“I know, Mina,” you interject, not wanting the rest of her sentence about the inevitable fall to your ear. “I just… Agh, you know what I mean!” You ruffle your hands through your hair in confliction, unsure how to piece your thoughts together.
Tilting your head over Mina’s shoulder, you sneak a glimpse at Bakugou, watching him as he’s cast to the side with the others. He’s fending himself from Kirishima and Sero’s combined jokes, that usual look on his face sending glares at the two and yelling something you could almost pick up on if you honed your ears a bit more. Surprisingly, when his eyes meet yours for a split second, he stands there looking nonchalant again. Both of you immediately avert your gazes.
Mina pats your shoulder, bringing you back to the conversation at hand. “I know, I know, but after this, I’m sure you can go back to ignoring his ass. After all, it’s just one training exercise, right?” she says. As her words deliver some relief to your ill-timed situation, you give in with a sigh.
Unbeknownst to you, turning your back to Mina and striding toward the rest of your teammates again, you miss the small glint in her yellow eyes, along with the subtle gestures she aims at the three boys, waving her pointed thumbs over your head secretively.
“So I take it you’re on the team with us, Y/n?” Sero asks when the two of you return. You nod in reply and the boy flashes his pearly whites in a wide grin that Kirishima mirrors. He nudges Bakugou at his sides which you subtly catch in the far corner of your eye.
You raise a brow suspiciously at their fidgeting, wondering why having you on their team warrants such enthusiasm, but you’re thankful for their energy at least. Someone has to lift the atmosphere for this not to be a complete drag and Bakugou surely isn’t going to be the mood maker of the group.
The blond scoffs. “Yeah, well, if you dumbasses are going to form a team with me, you’ll follow under my leadership, got it?”
The three readily agree. Though you roll your eyes, you don’t challenge his position, considering no one else is that much up to the task as he is. You’ll simply have to deal with the fact that you’re forced to tread through the day under his leadership. So with no objections, the five of you walk back to the class, gathering around the entrance of today’s battlefield.
Jumping into the activity, All Might goes about explaining today’s lesson to the four sets of teams—consisting of a group exercise to heighten teamwork. The name of the game? Capture the flag.
In short, each team will be split off into different sections of the labyrinth where their assigned flag is stationed. The objective is to not only protect your flag from being stolen but also try and steal an opposing team’s flag from their base and escort it safely to your home field. Nice and simple.
Not long after All Might’s explanation, the gate to the training grounds opens and you all scatter off into your teams, navigating through the twists of the maze to locate your flags. Once your group situated themselves onto your home base, you assemble in a huddle to devise a strategy before the game starts.
“So what’s the plan?” Kirishima asks, eyes darting around his teammates until they rest on Bakugou—the team leader. The ash-blond crosses his arms, a confident sneer plastered on his face as he’s already thought of his plan of action the moment All Might announced the mission.
“Easy. I’m going straight to the front-lines to swipe one of those dumbasses’ flags. You lot are gonna stay here and guard ours until I come back.” He delivers the strategy in a matter-of-fact tone that you quickly don’t take a liking to. Your fist curls in irritation.
“What kind of a plan is that?” you question audaciously, your voice louder than you intended. “So you’re just going to do all the work while we sit around and wait for you?”
Bakugou grits his teeth, leaning further into the huddle to direct his senseless logic. “Look, it’s the fastest and most surefire way to snag our victory without sacrificing anyone,” he says. Playing over his words again, he finds it surprising he even chooses to offer his reasoning. Because if it were anyone other than you he was arguing with, he’s certain he’d leave it at that.
Knowing the current tension between you was a result of his misjudgment, it feels only right for Bakugou to make an effort in communication. He ignores the antsy expressions belonging to the others who signal from behind you to follow along with their original plan.
You don’t seem to catch the hint, nor do you buy into his ridiculous strategy. “Oh, so you’re that confident you won’t get taken out by the other team then?” you quip. As a result, Bakugou’s brows tighten at your noncompliance.
“I know how to take care of myself. You of all people should realize by now that no other nerd in this whole damn class can outmatch me.”
“And what about an ambush? How do you know they simply won’t anticipate your strategy and see you coming?” You fire another counterargument and the boy purses his lips, beginning to find this quarrel spiraling into a headache rather than a step in the direction of reconciliation.
While Sero and Kirishima stand there, shifting their heads back and forth throughout the fiery exchange, Mina speedily reacts. The gears of that cunning mind of hers click into place again.
“You know what, Y/n’s right. Why don’t you two go together then?” she proposes boldly. Her suggestion catches you by complete surprise. You veer in her direction with an incredulous look blown in your eyes.
Before you can open your mouth to protest, the two boys standing beside her immediately back her up.
“Hm, Mina has a point. The chances of you falling into a trap wouldn’t be much if you two work together,” Sero remarks.
Kirishima follows, “Yeah, you guys can watch each other’s backs while going to collect the flag! It’s safer to go in a pair than by yourselves I’d say.”
The three seem adamant about the idea, sharing equally content expressions, and with all that said, you find it hard to dig yourself out of this situation. In a way, you practically volunteered yourself after questioning Bakugou’s plan and doubting his abilities. The group only feels it’s right you come along as his support since you clearly must be worried about his well-being.
Pushing your objections down your throat, you reluctantly agree to tag along with the blond. What you find exceptionally shocking is how Bakugou doesn’t oppose these new conditions. Given his hard-headed temperament, you thought he would’ve scoffed and turned his back at being paired without notice, but no such things were happening here.
...Odd.
“Tch, whatever. Let’s get going then,” is all he gives, starting in the direction into the urban area of the training course.
You trail behind him. “Coming, Boom-Boy…” you mutter the last bit but don’t suppress the urge to let your words be known. Bakugou turns his head and gives you a look akin to an uptight six-year-old you just offended at your local playground. You shrug in response, a corner of your lip pinched upward. He doesn’t pick a fight over the nickname, but his eyebrows remain fiercely slanted, and coupled with his heavy steps and the excessive swinging of his gauntlet-clad arms, it tells you of his emotional constipation plain as day.
.
.
The journey toward the other teams’ flags is cloaked in strained silence and the physical gap between you two does not encourage any of you to speak up. At this point, both of your levels of annoyance for each other have mellowed out. Now it just feels... awkward—strange. You don’t see his expression, nor does he see yours. It feels like you’re being left in the dark, having only the back of Bakugou’s head to stare at the entirety of the way, and though you supposedly have his back, Bakugou feels precarious in this state as he trudges along at the front, not daring to turn his head to cross your eyes.
The ambiance is reminiscent of the ancient Greek legend of Orpheus and Eurydice. Where Bakugou walks through the depths of the underworld, seeking you out in hopes you’d join his side once again. If he turns around now and spills his thoughts to you too soon, he fears that your forgiveness would be whisked away, thoroughly beyond his reach, and replaced with your promises of retribution.
That was the eloquent version of the situation anyway. To put it bluntly, Bakugou was just impatient as hell to say something to you. The silence suffocates him to the point where the words are nearly about to be squeezed out of his throat, but he bites his lip to snuff out the urges.
The more he keeps them in, the more fidgety he becomes, hands itchy and mouth trembling with grit between his teeth. The idea of not letting his voice be heard was something Bakugou detested. Mainly because it was already such a challenge to even keep his mouth shut, given his fiery attitude and lack of patience.
Man, what the hell am I hesitating for? he asks himself, that outspoken side of him spurring him on.
Ah, screw the uncertainty, he thinks. If he doesn’t say anything now, then he won’t get to say anything ever.
Bakugou stops in his tracks, turning his head. Here goes nothing,
“Hey, Y/n, I–”
“Katsuki–”
Words collide into each other, jumbled and incoherent, which take you two by surprise as you meet each other’s furrowed gazes. It’s quiet as you both piece your way through this, eyes trained like you haven’t seen each other in months when the reality is that a week of bitterness has somehow made you act like strangers. The bewildered look crossing his features is foreign to you; you’ve never quite seen Bakugou as taken aback as he is now.
“You first,” you grant before Bakugou could mix up your words again. Even being given permission, the blond still isn’t sure what to say, his thoughts lost on him the moment his voice clashed with yours. He takes a deep breath, calming his senses and steadying his mind for what he wants to convey.
“Look, Y/n, I don’t know how to put this as nicely as I can,” he begins, tone consistent yet wary, assessing your expression, “but I know I fucked up and I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have left you there all by yourself. I shouldn’t… have blown you off like that and forgotten about you.” He delivers this bluntly—honestly—as open as a boy of his nature can muster with arms spread out, willingly exposing him to his faults and your reprisals.
Looking at you, he finds your eyes are cast to the floor, assuming to be reflecting on his words carefully. After some deliberation, you come across the vermillion in his eyes.
“Frankly, I haven’t entirely forgiven you just yet. But I will say that despite how I’ve been acting, I’m not as mad at you as you think,” is what you give, and Bakugou would be lying to himself if he didn’t achieve relief at your statement. He mentally releases a breath he hadn’t realized he was holding throughout the exchange. However, you aren’t done yet.
“I just want you to understand what moments like those mean to me. It’s during that time where I can share my feelings and learn more about you—understand who you are,” you say. Bakugou latches onto every word. “And it goes both ways, you know. It’s hard to want to stay in a relationship with someone who doesn’t make an effort to make time for you.” It’s obvious you aim that comment at him as Bakugou’s eyes soften slightly hearing it. His calloused, glove-clad hands wrap into his palms. Man, he really was a jerk.
“Still… I know you’re making an effort to be sincere and that you’re genuinely sorry for what happened, especially considering how the others seem to have set this whole conversation up, right?” Bakugou winces over the Bakusquad’s ploy coming to light and makes a note not to follow along next time unless those dummies can scrape up a more elaborate plan.
Despite that, he presses on, “So, what does this mean?” A smile settles on the curve of your lips, sensing his impatience as his voice hastens you along.
“Well…” you begin, speech drawn out in anticipation as you step toward him to where Bakugou follows your movements. That is until he catches a few shadowy figures shifting around atop the small building behind you. Before you can open your mouth to continue, his instincts flare to life.
“Hey, look out!” he exclaims, already acting on his warnings by lunging forward to push you out of the way. Your breaths draw back into your lungs, your body thrust abruptly into the opposite direction. Landing on your butt, you wince at both the shock and the pain, but your whines desist when you witness Bakugou taking a force to the head as a result of coming to your aid.
“Katsuki!” you yell, immediately getting off the ground to rush to his side, but he can’t find it in himself to respond. Afflicted with a substantial blow to the crown of his head, his whole being throbs and his vision spins.
Fuck, is Y/n, okay? is the first thing on his mind, ignoring the liquid trickling down his forehead. His question is answered upon turning his head to meet your anxious expression—your eyes wide and lips quivering as they move to say words he can’t exactly make out beneath the pounding sensations consuming his mind. As he feels a set of arms wrap around him, he tries discerning his surroundings to form a reply, but can only capture bits and pieces.
“—tsuki! ...old… n!”
“...god—! I’m so dead!”
A sputter of words tangling together is the last he hears before his vision fades to black.
.
.
The next time Bakugou awakes, his eyes slowly sever open to come face-to-face with a blurry white ceiling. The lights assault his vision as his senses take time to adjust, unraveling the environment to realize he’s laying on a bed—a hospital bed to be precise.
He attempts lifting himself but is met with retaliation in the form of his pulsating head which he immediately flinches at. His hand goes to rub his scalp to soothe the ache and he finds bandages wrapped tightly around him. “What the hell happened?” The last he remembers is traversing the urban area with you for the capture the flag mission before finally confronting the subject that had been plaguing your minds for a week now. After that, he caught sight of some object descending toward you and before he had even realized it, his feet had moved on their own. Next thing he knows, he’s waking up in the nurse’s office with a headache from hell.
Wait, what about you? Were you okay? Surely, he had to have pushed you out of the way in time, right?
His head moves quicker than it should’ve, revealing the other hospital bed in the room to be unoccupied, vacant. He sighs and his relief is further bolstered by the door to the nurse’s room opening to unveil you unharmed with only your heavy look of concern troubling him.
“Katsuki, oh thank god, you’re okay!” you say, quickly pacing over to his side with a glass of water in hand. You leave it at his bedside, sitting before him. Gauging your appearance up and down, Bakugou tries making out even the smallest details.
“You aren’t hurt?”
You’re appalled he would ask this despite clearly being the one patched up in a hospital bed right now, and likely sporting some serious head trauma.
“Of course I am, you’re the one that lunged forward to protect me,” you tell him. Bakugou looks down at his lap, figuring that was what happened, but hearing it from you comforted him more than he thought. However, his comfort is wretched from him by the intense pressure persisting in his skull. Seeing him in pain, you urge him to lay down and rest.
“How the hell did I end up here anyway?”
You fidget with your fingers, hesitating on answering. At that, the blond lifts a brow, suspicious.
“Mineta… accidentally dropped a rock on your head.”
“...You gotta be joking, right?”
Bakugou leers hard, finding the reason he was out of commission to be a damn pebble hitting his head a detriment to his pride. And because of Mineta of all fucking people. Still, if he hadn’t acted as quickly as he did, you would’ve been the one to meet his fate instead, and he weighed this outcome to better than the former.
Then you explain how the teachers had temporarily intervened to bring his unconscious body to the nurse’s, where the old lady went about tending to his injury. Said she did her job and all he needed was to rest and let her quirk take fuller effect within that time.
“So did we win the game?” He switches the topic to today’s mission of capture the flag that was cut short on his end.
You shake your head, but at least grant him the benefit of knowing Mineta’s team ended up placing last. At that, his eyelids shut and he crosses his arms behind his bandaged head. “Yeah, well, it wasn’t my intention to win anyway.”
You give him a look. “...Liar.”
Bakugou cracks an eye open at you. “Hah? What do you mean I’m a fucking liar?”
“I know you, Katsuki. I dated you, after all. And the Katsuki that I dated is an arrogant, competitive jerk who thinks of being the best above all else.” Bakugou scrunches his nose, wondering what you’re implying through your... overly frank descriptions. “Still… he’s sweet and caring at times… and reliable when he needs to be,” you continue, tone softening that draws Bakugou in, “And the kind of guy I want to give a second chance to.”
Absorbing your words, Bakugou blinks. “S-Seriously?” He doesn’t mean to stutter, but the offer catches him off-guard. He replays what you just said. That’s what he heard, right? A second chance?
You giggle at how uncharacteristically astonished he sounds. “Yes, seriously.”
“Does that mean you forgive me for what happened last week?”
You hum between pursed lips in playful contemplation. “Well, maybe you can redeem yourself by going on another date with me then?”
Hearing your proposal, a wide grin arcs his lips, edging into a smirk.
“That’s it? Well, I can definitely fucking do that,” he states, confidence rejuvenating his body at the new, hopeful chance before him.
“Oh, just one more thing though,” you suddenly add.
“What?”
“We are not going to that Chinese Restaurant again.”
876 notes · View notes
ozarkthedog · 3 years
Text
Learning Curve | S. Rogers
Tumblr media
summary: Sam explains what the "marble" actually is to Steve and Bucky.
warnings: Swearing. Talk of a Sex Toy.
word count: 889
author's note: Part 2 of Daydreaming. This was so fun to write. Also, this is my first time writing for Sam, I hope I did him justice! There will be a smut filled third part!
Read Part 1 : Daydreaming | Read Part 3: Balls Deep
📖 Master List
This work has Adult Content. If you click “Keep Reading” you have agreed that you are over the age of 18 and are willing to view such content.
Tumblr media
Sam Wilson was headed towards the gym when he spotted Steve and Bucky huddled close together and talking quietly.
“Why're we being all secretive over here?” Sam joked, somehow sneaking up on the super soldiers and making them jump. Sam noticed Bucky’s hand disappear rather quickly behind his back.
“Hey! He-Sam. Hi. Sam.” Rushing the words too fast, Steve’s face began turning red. Bucky said nothing as Sam quirked an eyebrow at him instead looking off in different directions very much unlike the stealth fighter he was known to be.
“You headed to the gym?” Steve steadied his voice this time around but he couldn’t hide the tell-tale sign of embarrassment at being caught red handed. Barnes was still silent, looking intently down the hall.
Sam’s eyes flicked back to Steve, “Uh, yeah. Want to do some sparring later?”
“Sure, definitely. Later. Let’s do that. Later.” Steve padded Bucky’s back pushing his longtime friend forward, forcing the man out of his statuesque state. “Buck and I will be back later.”
Steve wound his arm around Bucky’s head and started dragging him away when Sam spun on his heels. “Ok, who’s going to tell me what’s going on?” Sam stood like a mother with his hands on his hips.
Bucky and Steve exchanged a look before swiftly walking over to Sam and creating a tiny huddle.
“Steve found a marble earlier, but it's unlike any we’ve played with.” Bucky confessed, holding up the small round object.
“I was so excited to show Buck I didn’t notice the smell until he said something.” Steve adds, nudging his head in Bucky’s direction.
Confused, Sam leaned over and took a whiff of the tiny ball only to rear back in disbelief. “That ain’t no marble.”
“Why would it smell like that?!” Steve said rather loudly, causing agents passing by to turn their heads curiously.
Sam pulled the huddle in closer. “Where did you find it exactly?” he pressed, fixing his stare on a bewildered Steve.
“I found it on the floor after the meeting. I was turning a corner too fast and bumped into Y/N.” His face pinched with remorse, still feeling bad about taking off so suddenly.
The hallway filled with laughter as Sam tried to cover his face, amused with the fact that the super soldiers had no idea what they were carrying.
“You going to tell us what’s so funny.” Bucky grumbled, rolling the ball around in his left hand. The metal of his hand clinking as he played with the ball.
“First of all, you’re going to both want to wash your hands.” Sam gestured, pointing to the soldiers.
“Second of all” Sam said with a hushed tone, pulling the pair back into a huddle, “What you have in your possession is a Ben Wa Ball.”
He received puzzled looks making him plainly state, “It’s a sex toy.”
“WHAT!?” both Bucky and Steve exclaimed in astonishment. Bucky dropped the toy suddenly like it was burning him, a sharp clanging sound echoed in the hallway as it bounced out of the huddle.
“Shit!” Steve bounded after the ball, quickly scooping it up safely before returning to the huddle.
“Why would this be in the building?!” Steve hissed, trying to keep his spirited voice to a minimum.
Sam shrugged, “Perhaps it’s Y/N’s?”
“But why?” Bucky pressed.
Sam clapped a hand on the men's shoulders, “As strange as it seems, that little ball is beneficial for women.” He rubbed a hand over his face in disbelief realizing he was the one explaining this to the duo.
“They’re meant to help strengthen the muscles down there.” His eyes drifted to the ground for a second before returning back to the sets of blue orbs.
“I’ve also heard they feel really good for the person using them.” He sent them both a wink before backing out of the huddle and turning to leave.
“Hey, wait. What’re we supposed to do with it?” Steve raised his hand up showing off the ball before shamefully making a fist and hiding the evidence.
“I’d get it back to the owner if I were you.” Sam said with a rich laugh before heading into the gym.
The 2 soldiers stared at one another in disbelief until Bucky cleared his throat and smacked Steve on the chest, “Good Luck, Punk. Let me know how it goes.”
Steve swore under his breath as he watched Bucky head into the gym.
Contemplating how to return the toy, he started walking in the direction he left you. Should he pretend he doesn’t know what it is and never talk to you again? Or should he drop a hint and see if you were interested?
He noticed how you’d gaze at him whenever you were in the room together and he’d be lying if he didn’t find himself being distracted by you as well.
He rolled his tongue over his gums as he considered his options, planning what he’d say and how not to make a fool of himself.
A rush of footfalls bounced off the walls stirring him from his thoughts when, suddenly, you appeared around the corner, sweaty and breathless. You looked relieved and yet mortified to see him, “Uh, hi, Steve.”
917 notes · View notes
the-winter-spider · 3 years
Text
Element: Part 2
Characters: Bucky x Reader
Warnings: Hints around possible suicide attempt, angst
A/N: Got this out a lot faster than i thought, once again i didnt read thru it lol so please excuse if there is any errors!
Word count: 2.1k
Part one
****
Bucky reached into the water pulling you out with his right arm, he let a gasp out when the temperature of the water touched his skin it was ice cold sending goosebumps all throughout his body. You were fully clothed, limp, cold to the touch, skin pale, lips blue. Not like he was used to, this wasn't the you he grew to love. You were radiant, your eyes were the most beautiful colour they reminded him of the night sky the way they shined like the stars, your lips were plump and filled with colour, looking at them now he almost couldn’t remember if they were more red or pink, he could feel his palms getting clammy, panic was running through him, when was the last time he saw the sparkle in your eyes? You were his sun, you were warmth, in this moment he felt regret he never got to kiss your lips.
He set you gently down on the tiled floor, you laid there lifeless, Steve was already kneeling down getting ready to start chest compressions, anything to bring you back, to Bucky, to him, to the team.
“No no no” Bucky mumbled.
“Vitals?” Tony frantically asked the AI
“No heartbeat detected”
Bucky didn’t know but tears were streaming down his face, so much regret was running through his veins, he didn't try hard enough and he knew that now but he didn't want to push you, he hated when Steve or Sam tried to push him. He wanted to hold you more and not like this, he wanted to feel life in your body, not this, all Bucky had ever known was death after being used by HYDRA for all those years and when they were finally out his head, everyone he knew before HYDRA were dead, except Steve of course but you brought life back into the super soldier something he was almost positive would never happened and Bucky was barely ever wrong but with you it felt so right.
The water surrounding them slowly started to evaporate, they realized it wasn’t coming from the tap in the tub, you made all the water and the fact it was disappearing, panic set in. “Where's medical?!” Tony frantically shouted.
“They are on there way” FRIDAY announced
Bucky couldn’t wait; he waited his whole life and it was a long one to finally be free and find someone like you, it felt like hours had passed since he busted down your door but he knew it had only been seconds, if not minutes. He scooped you up off the floor holding you in his arms as tightly as he could, he felt like they were wasting time sitting here doing what felt like the bare minimum when he knew the kind of medicine Tony had, he was a Stark after all and from being in the war he knew every second counted, he had a small hope that if he started running towards the medic wing your chances would be better rather than waiting around. He couldn’t take his eyes off of you fearing that this would be one of the last times he saw you and he wasn't prepared for that. You were so limp in his arms, water no longer dripping off of you. As he passed the rest of the team, all he could hear was gasps. He met the medical team half way, setting you on the stretcher before they ran off with you to med bay, Tony and Bruce trailing close behind them.
Bucky was frozen in place, he couldn’t feel anything, he felt like he was in a dream, a bad one, not like the nightmares he was used to this felt much worse, he kept hoping that he would wake up and leave his room to find you in the kitchen eating your morning cereal with Steve and you would give him the most beautiful smile he’s ever seen in all his years, the way he felt your eyes light up and the sun got a little brighter when you were near him, you thought he didn’t notice but Bucky noticed everything with you, or he thought he did. He doesn't even know when he stopped noticing things with you, or when you started to ignore the team, especially him. Part of him didn't even want to think about how long ago it started happening, how long you were truly alone.
Steve placed his hand on his best friends shoulder giving in a gentle squeeze “they’re gonna do everything in their power to get her back Buck”
Bucky couldn’t stop but replaying the last couple weeks or was it months? In his mind, did you do this on purpose? Was it an accident? Why did you do it? He remembers the first time he decided not to ask you to come with them. Sam, Steve, Natasha and him were going to try out this new chinese restaurant as they were coming up to your door, he was hoping for a miracle and you would open the door already ready to come with them and it would sort of be like a date but not really but he would pretend it was, but it didn't happen and he wasn’t sure how much more his heart could take of being shot down all the time so he decided he wasn't going to ask you tonight, when they finally reached your door, Steve stopped “Buck, aren't you going to ask y/n if she wants to come?”
Bucky's eyes went to your door, he doesn't remember the last time he was in your room, laying in your bed with you talking about anything and everything. He felt a pain in his chest and he mumbled out “No point” shrugging his shoulders leaving the 3 of his friends behind him making his way to the elevator. He heard them laughing, probably at him he felt pathetic he was a super soldier for christ sake but he couldn’t muster up all the strength in the world to ask you on a real date just him and you, or to admit his ever growing feelings for you, so he did what he knew best, kept quiet and to himself, he just wish he knew then he was hurting you in the process too, not just himself.
Everyone was patiently waiting in the common room just outside med bay. Bucky couldn't take his attention away from the plum tree just outside the window, when you grew it for him he swore his heart skipped a beat, that was one of the nicest things anyone has ever done for him, he still remembers that day like it only just happened. He had just left the gym and was heading back to his room when he saw you laying down in front of his door reading whatever book you were reading, you must have been deep into the book because you didn't notice him standing directly above you, he whispered “Good book?” making you jump and drop the book on your face, he couldn’t help but chuckle, he threw his towel over his shoulder offering you a hand up.
“It was a good book till i lost my place” You huffed
“Sorry doll” he smiled, something he only ever did around you, the real kind of smile, the kind that made his cheeks hurts not the fake kind he did around everyone else, he watched you dust yourself off and run your fingers through your hair, fixing yourself up, he didn't understand why you already looked perfect “So what do i owe the pleasure of having a beautiful girl like you waiting on a guy like me?”
Giggling “Well i have something for you, a gift” you blushed, he watched you rock back and forth on your feet, he was getting that feeling in his stomach again he wasn't sure what it was but it was warm, something he didn't think he deserved to feel again let it actually happening but here it was, with you.
He quickly showered and changed, when he stepped out of the bathroom you hadn’t moved you were still sitting on the edge of his bed, flipping through your book, trying to figure out where you left off, when you felt his presence you looked up, your eyes meeting his “You ready to go Buck?”
He nodded making his way to the door “after you doll”
It was silent when the two of you were making your way wherever you were leading him, he didn't ask any questions he would follow you anywhere, anytime no questions asked. You made your way outside to a tree he doesnt think he seen before, because it was the only tree there, he watched you start moving your hands with elegance, he was and always has been in complete awe of your abilities, with a doubt in his mind you were the most amazing person to have ever come from HYDRA. He had no idea what the gift was but he knew he would love it, whatever it was because it was from you, but when Bucky saw something start growing on the tree his eyes went wide “How did you know?”
“I overheard you talking to Steve about them the other day, how you missed them and the ones from the store didn't taste the same” You spoke softly, folding your hands behind your back looking down shyly. Bucky made his way to the plum tree picking one before he made his way over to you, he used his right arm to put a strand of hair behind your ear, his fingertips lightly touching your cheek while doing so it sent shivers down your spine and butterflies in your stomach, you lifted your gaze to meet his. He took your hand in his, giving it a light squeeze “this is my favourite gift”.
“The tree or that one plum?” you giggled, pointing at the perfect plum in his hand.
He took a moment before responding to you, really taking everything in, the view, his feelings because he was feeling a lot of them, some new some old, the emotions he could see in your eyes, how perfect you truly were but also how right it felt having your hand in his, his tongue ran over his lips “You” he breathed out, you kept your gaze on him for a few more seconds before you felt heat rising to your cheeks, looking back down, his thumb rubbing circles on your hand, he wasn't sure if you felt what he was feeling but when a single butterfly landed on the plum in his hand, he knew.
Bucky wasn't the best with time, after being in and out of cryo for so long he didn't care to tell time, so he wasn't sure how long he was standing here staring at the window lost in thought till he was finally pulled away from it, he felt Steve come up from behind him, he cleared his throat, placing another hand on his friends shoulder looking out the window to see what Bucky was staring at for the last hour.
“Y’know she grew that for me?”
Steve smiled “I know because you wouldn’t shut up about it” Bucky let out a soft chuckle, turning to face his friend “I messed up Steve”
Steve didn’t say anything he didn’t know what to say and Steve almost always knew what to say but he couldn’t comfort his friend because it was unknown if you were alive or not, he knew you were a fighter but what he saw, you were lifeless, FRIDAY even confirmed there was no heartbeat, he wasn't trying to give his oldest friend false hope, so in the meantime he decided that just being there was enough.
“I don’t understand, she can breathe underwater can't she?” Natasha finally spoke to no one in particular, turning all heads towards her before anyone could respond when the door opened. Tony walked in “She can” all eyes were on him, something he usually loved but it made him feel uneasy today. It was quiet, Tony sat down took off his glasses, he rubbed the bridge of his nose with his fingers before looking Bucky dead in the eye “they found a heart beat, its shallow but its there”
***
TAGS: @majo240820 @vicmc624 @jessyballet @jhiddles03 @mggpleasedontlookhere @smallangryandpink @lilxberry @thisisnotangel @hereforalongtime512 @austynparksandpizza
251 notes · View notes
tearsofellen · 3 years
Text
One Way or Another (yandere!Dabi x f!Reader)
Tumblr media
Pairing: Yandere!Dabi x f!Reader, Hawks x f!Reader
Synopsis: Being a doctor at the hero hospital is stressful enough. However, what happens when your beloved friend Hawks begins to take a liking to you? And what if he isn’t the only one who has his eye on you? An evil Dabi starts to fall for you immensely after one dark night. Nothing can hold him back from his urge to have you.
Part 1 / ?
Words: 3.5k
Warning: This story will eventually have mentions of stalking, violence, gore, language, and hard smut. Viewer’s discretion is advised.
________________________________________________________________
The sounds of birds tweeting filled your ears. Today your bed seemed just that more comfortable as the sunlight dripped though your curtains. The sound of the traffic in your city was at a minimum as you sighed into your pillow. Finally, a day off from work. This week had kicked your ass hard. Your job at the Hero hospital was a privilege and a burden. While you were one of a very small group who could treat and aid the top heroes, it was a very stressful job. The hours weren’t exactly nine to five and some nights you were heading home with your head low in complete exhaustion. However, you still loved your job. You had a great sense of pride knowing that you could give back to the heroes who protected you and everyone around you. 
But today is your day off.  You knew how to separate your job and your personal life.  You lay in bed thinking of what you planned to do with your free time.  Your kitchen could do with a cleaning, but the idea of sitting on the couch watching bad reality television sounded more appeasing to you. You smiled into your pillow, finally a day to relax and do absolutely nothing.
Then your phone buzzed.
You opened one eye to see your boss’ caller ID on your screen. You grabbed the phone from your nightstand and reluctantly answered. Before you could even say hello, the sound of your boss yelling over the phone broke the silence in your room.
"_______ get in here now we need you!"
 With your shoelaces undone and a piece of toast in your mouth, you dashed outside of your apartment with your work bag tossed on your back. Your boss informed you of a villain attack in the city centre which caused some heroes to be injured. Fire injuries were your specialty, so you were called immediately. Your legs were running to the train station, hoping not to miss the train to the hospital and having to wait another ten minutes for the next train.
While you were fixing your tie around your neck, your eyes caught sight of a small red object flying across in front of you. After a small moment of confusion, you heard the sound of wings flapping behind you and immediately knew who it was.
"Hey hey hey, didn’t know you were into running these days ______?"
You scoffed, swallowing the last bit of your toast as you dodged hitting into a random person in the street.
"Not now Hawks" You yelled up at him. "I’m running late."
Hawks. Number 2 Hero. You both met each other when he had only just graduated from this hero training. He survived a nasty attack from a villain, resulting in his feathers being pretty damaged. You were the one who took care of him and patched him up.  He was in the hospital for two days straight and most of that time was spent with you monitoring his health. His determination to become a top hero and his snarky charisma allow you two to immediately have a connection. After he was discharged, he still kept in contact with you and now he could consider you one of his closest friends. Till this day, he is forever grateful for you helping him, but these days teasing you seems more fun to him.
The man was now gliding alongside you, clearly mocking your lack of speed.
"Why am I not surprised?" He chuckled, eyeing you.
You sent him a stern glare. Unfortunately, you could not argue with him and run at the same time without losing your breath.
"You know, sweetheart, the train is about to leave in a minute, and unless you just gained a speed quirk, chances are you're not going to make it," he teased.
You held your tongue at his words. When you first told him you didn’t have a quirk, he thought you were joking and laughed in your face. Needless to say, you weren’t too happy about that. So whenever he sees the chance, he always enjoys pointing it out.
Hawks continued to fly beside you, now sighing and crossing his arms behind his head.
"Only if you knew someone who could get you to the hospital in time." He groaned.
He raised his eyebrow at you. You knew what he was trying to imply. Your stomach immediately started to do flips at the thought of it. You hated heights and Hawks knew this about you. But he also knows about how much your work matters to you.
You eyed your watch on your wrist, already you were ten minutes late. You glanced down to see Hawks’ red feathers tying your shoelaces. You finally stopped running and stood trying to catch your breath.  You ignored the rational thoughts in your head and returned back to glare at Hawks.
"I swear Hawks if you do anything funny." You sneered at him.
His face immediately lit up with glee and a smirk spread across his face.
"Trust me _____. It will be like floating on a cloud. " He reassured you by putting his hand on his heart.
"Just don’t throw up on me again." He hushed quickly. 
Before you even had time to swear at him, he whooshed behind you and lifted you up in his arms. You immediately let out a squeak in fear, earning a laugh from Hawks. Your hands gripped his neck and your body tensed up as you both started to rise to the sky. You both were now above the skyscrapers and the whole city seemed so small. It was truly breath taking and you wondered if Hawks ever just spent his days looking down at the city.  
You cast a quick glance down at the people who had turned into ants. Your stomach dropped and you turned your face into hawks’ chest for the rest of the journey to avoid throwing up.
"You can look up now doll."
You cranked your head to see if Hawks was telling the truth. You were relieved to see that his feet were touching the ground. He had landed on the hospital roof, a perfect spot.
"Nice landing" you jerked at him.
"You’re welcome Miss." He said, rolling his eyes.
You hopped out of his arms and stood attempting to fix yourself up before you entered the hospital. You could tell the wind messed up your hair quite a bit.
"You look fine ____."
Now you were the one to roll your eyes. Last time he said that you walked into your meeting with your lipstick smeared across your face.
"Shouldn’t you have been helping save your colleagues from that villain attack?"
"Had to make sure my _____ was safe first." Hawks was always skilled at avoiding questions he didn’t want to answer. You chalked it up to his media training.
You made your way to the door leading down to the hospital as soon as you felt you had put yourself together decently. Hawks' mouth dropped at your actions. He flew to block the door to prevent you from leaving.
"Nothing else you want to say?" He pestered at you. "No thank you, hawks or hawks; you are my hero; you are incredible?"
He really made a poor impression of you.
"Thank you, Hawks. Now shove it. " You snapped thinking of the time you are wasting with him up here. Your words, however, did not convince the young hero.
"How about takeaway and a movie at your place?" He questioned.
"Did you just invite yourself over to my place?" You sneered at him; your arms now crossed.
"Is it a deal?" He spoke. You were beginning to realise that there was no way hawks was going to let you though unless you said yes. You both haven’t done anything together in a while, you thought to yourself.
"Deal." You nodded.
Hawks’ feathers fluttered and he busted into a sing-song voice.
"Perfect! I’ll buy the food and you can pick the movie. Bye _____! " He yelled, tossing himself over the building as he flew away into the clouds.
Your mouth dropped at how he was able to make you agree to invite him over to your house within a minute. You sighed, rolling your eyes as you pushed the door open to enter the hospital.
As you entered your unit of the hospital, your boss was stood there waiting for you and your co-workers busily hurrying around.
"Look who finally decided to turn up."
You did your best not to glare at him.  You apologised profusely about being late to him and how it wouldn’t happen again.
"I heard she was seen with her boyfriend Hawks" A staff member piped up with a sneer.
You cringed at her words and her attempt to cause drama in front of your boss. Hawks is many things, but your boyfriend is definitely not one of them. 
"He is not my boyfriend. He was helping me to work. " You defended yourself. 
"I don’t want to hear anymore of the bird boy. Get working now _____. " Your boss yelled. 
You gave a low nod and immediately jumped into work, making your way over to your first patient.
 _______________________________________________________________
When you actually finished with the last patient, you had no idea what time it was. You gathered your belongings and exited the building, only to find the city engulfed in darkness. You sighed, your shoulders heavy from fatigue. The thought of a relaxing bath and a comfortable bed appealed to you. You checked your phone to find that the train station had closed long ago. Your eyes darted across the street for a taxi, but you had no luck. Walking it was, you thought.
You tried your best to stick to bright lit areas of the city. It was one of the disadvantages of being quirkless, you were practically defenceless. If a villain wanted to kill you, they would have no problem with doing it. That is why you prefer to work behind the scenes helping the heroes rather than being at the front of the violence.
Your walking stopped as you reached an alleyway. You debated or not if you should enter it. If you stuck to the bright areas, you wouldn’t reach your apartment for another fifteen minutes. However, if you went down this dark alleyway it would only take you five minutes. You stood listening for any noise to indicate if there was anyone down the dark path. After standing in silence, you made the decision to chance it. You took a breath and made your way down the narrow street.
All was well and you finally started to calm down as you walked. You thought of what leftovers you had in your fridge to eat when you heard the noise of glass breaking behind you. Your blood turned to ice as your body froze into place. When you looked to the source of the racket, a single drop of sweat ran down your brow.
A man with his head hanging low sat beside one of the big trash bins. You quickly realised the man wasn't all there when he didn't acknowledge you as you walked by. Your brain was screaming at you to keep walking. Your heart and morals, on the other hand, told you to check on the man's safety. You bit your lower lip, carefully weighing your options. Your morals came out on top.
"Sir?" you asked.
You were met with silence since the man did not respond. As you got closer, it became clear that the man was in pain. When you were within arm’s reach, you cautiously put your hand on the individual's neck to check for a pulse. Fortunately, it was at a consistent rate. You now knelt beside him. You tapped his shoulder lightly. Finally, the man let out a groan. You breathed a sigh of relief.
You gently pushed his head back, allowing you to see his face in the moonlight. You immediately noticed the faulty stitching and staples all around his face and body. The damaged deep purpled skin contrasted sharply with his pale skin. His eyelids hung low, but the brightness of the moon resulted in the stranger opening his eyes halfway. You were almost in shock at his bright blue eyes as they stared into yours.
"Am I dreaming?" He mumbled painfully.
You shook your head as you examined his body.
"What is the problem sir?" You questioned.
He sent a sly grin at you. Your concern was able to amuse the man. His finger weakly pointed at his opposite arm. One of the stitches on his arm had obviously ripped open and blood was steadily pouring out and onto the dirty ground.
You stared at the wound for a moment and considered if he needed to be taken to the hospital.
Almost as if he were reading your mind, he said, "No hospitals."
You chose not to question him and began to act on your feet. You removed your bag from your back and pulled out your first aid kit and some tools you used at work. You began to place a thread into your incision needle and prepared the medical stapler for use.
You could sense his apprehensiveness as he eyed your needle.
"Trust me sir, I’m a doctor." You explained to him.
"You'd better cut the sir crap; you're making me feel like an old man." He laughed lightly,
Feeling like you were getting somewhere with him, you continued the conversation. 
"Do you have a name?" You asked, hoping to distract him from the pain about to happen.
The man had a slight hesitation as his name fell from his mouth.
"Dabi."
You placed some hydrogen peroxide onto a cotton ball as you continued to talk to him.
"You have a lovely name, Dabi."
"I bet you say that to all your patients."
You smiled at his words and you placed the cotton on his wound. He immediately tensed up and hissed in pain as the alcohol did its job.
"I can promise you I don’t, Dabi." His name fell off your lips with such ease.
After you felt the wound was disinfected, you grabbed the needle and began to stitch his skin together. Dabi was now sat up straight admiring your concentration with the needle. He couldn’t remember the last time someone had cared for him like this.
"Did you get caught up in that villain attack this morning? “You asked him.
Dabi's mouth turned into a smirk, "I guess you can say I was."
"I bet it was scary," you said.
Dabi raised his eyebrow at you. "Do I look like the sort of person who gets scared?"
You took your attention from his wound and looked at his unamused face. You giggled slightly at his expression.
"You can tell me. I promise I won’t tell anyone. " You teased him.
He chuckled at your humour. You really did do a good job at distracting him from the pain.
"Those villains are pieces of shit, aren’t they?" He said, hoping for your opinion.
As you took the stapler in your hand, you moved on to the staples of the wound.
"Hmm, I don’t know if I would say that." You mentioned focusing on placing the stapler in the right position on his skin.
"What? You side with the League of Villains? " Dabi pried at you, staring at you with interest.
"Not exactly." You explained, "I believe a lot of the villains didn’t exactly have a choice of which side they wanted to be on. Also, working with Heroes, you begin to see that quirks determine what society thinks of you. If you don’t have a quirk, then you must be useless. If you have a dangerous quirk, then you are destined to be a villain. I find it all very frustrating if I am honest. "
Dabi listened intently to your rambling. It was nice to see someone agree with some of his opinions. You were obviously very intelligent. As you continued to work on his arm, he made note of your face and its beauty.
As you had just finished the last staple, you asked him, "Did you patch your skin up yourself?"
"Yeah, I did. I prefer to do it my own way because the majority of my skin is brunt to a crisp.” He explained.
"You have a fire quirk?"
He nodded as your eyes moved across his body to look at his skin. Your eyes finally meet his face. Without even thinking, you reached your hand out to cup in check and brushed your thumb along the staples in his face.
Dabi let out a small gasp. It had been a while since someone had touched him. You finally realised what you did and immediately yanked your hand away from him and stood up, hoping he wouldn’t see you blush in embarrassment.
"I’m really sorry Dabi" you said, putting your face in your hand, "I’ve just never seen anyone with a fire quirk like this."
He smiled at your embarrassment.
"Don’t worry. There is no need to be sorry. I didn’t mind it. " He reassured you.
You sighed and reached a hand out to help him up off the ground.
As he towered over your frame, you suddenly realised how tall he was in comparison to you. As soon as you realised your work was done, you let his hand out of yours.
"Well Dabi" you said, "I guess I better be heading home."
"Thank you" was all he said.
While your arms hugged you around your stomach, his deep blue gaze on you made you feel even more insecure.
"Are you going to be okay?" You asked him.
A small smile was on his face.
"Don’t worry about me."
You nodded to let him know you understood.
"Then I better go." You said, turning away from him.
Before Dabi could open his mouth to say anything to you, a black car drove into the alleyway with a large honk of its horn.  The tinted window rolled down the slightest bit and a voice called out Dabi’s name.
"That’s my ride," Dabi explained.
He didn't want to abandon you in the dark, but he also knew that you getting into the car would be impossible.
"Well take care Dabi", You said your last words and turned the corner away from him and the car.
You knew that it wouldn’t have been a good idea if you stayed any longer. You did your duty and left without anything else occurring. You had visions of the man’s blue eyes and face. You could tell from his body and face he was probably conventionally attractive before his burn scars. You ignored the flutters you had in your stomach as you took the stairs up to your apartment floor.
After entering the code to your apartment, you quickly tossed your bag to the floor and threw your jacket off. You sighed with relief to finally be home alone. Peace and quiet was the thing you needed after your long day.
"Finally home sweetheart?"
When you saw the man behind you holding a plate of takeaway sushi, you shrieked and nearly fell to the floor in shock.
"Hawks you little-!"
________________________________________________________________
Dabi threw up his hands in frustration as he approached the LOV's hideout. He completely forgot to ask for your name. After you had taken care of his injuries, the very least he could do was ask for your name.
He sighed and sat on the grimy couch. His thoughts returned to the events of your and his meeting. He was still bewildered that you chose to help a random stranger in the dark. Dabi knew that if it hadn't been for you, he would have bled out until he passed out and died. His fingertips traced the stitching on his arm that you had done. It was noticeably better done than his own work.
"What are you smiling about?" Toga spoke up, breaking Dabi of his thoughts.
His face immediately dropped, and he muttered a nothing. Toga shrugged off his reply and reached for the TV remote. The sound of the TV made Dabi’s head throb, so he stood up and headed out of the room to find somewhere more peaceful to rest for the night.
"What was the situation like in the hospital tonight Doctor?" the interviewer asked.
"Well, I would personally like to thank the heroes who were able to transport the citizens and other heroes who were harmed in the attack to the hospital so quickly."
The sound of your voice echoing throughout the room made Dabi freeze in place. He turned around to face the TV and ordered Toga to turn up the volume.
Dabi barely heard your voice as he continued to stare in a trance at your lovely face.
"We would like to thank you and your unit for all your help today. We are all grateful. " The interview told you.
You nodded and smiled at the camera as you wished everyone well.
Your name suddenly appeared at the bottom of the screen.
"Doctor _____ ______"
Dabi's face lit up with a big grin, and he couldn't help but laugh. He figured it wouldn't be that difficult to find you after all.
411 notes · View notes
purpleyellow · 3 years
Text
The audacity
Seventeen 14th member
Hayun’s masterlist
“Seventeen won’t take bs when it comes to Hayun”
Requested by: two (2) anons    
cw: offensive language
a/n: Feel free to share your thoughts with me. Requests are open! 💙
(to my brazilians around, this gif is svt’s version of ninguem solta a mão de ninguem)
Tumblr media
The arrival of dancers made the practice room even more crowded and noisy than usual. It was one of the few times Seventeen worked with an outside dance team, and they happened to have a lot of new faces around, who needed time to figure out the staging and how things were working so far.
After they ran through the choreography a couple of times, the choreographer called in a break, allowing the huge group to instantly clear the middle space and separate themselves into small circles of conversations.
Seungcheol, Jeonghan, and Joshua instantly met each other and began chatting about dinner plans and whatnot. Slowly approaching Jun and Wonwoo, the oldest filled them in on what they're deciding until he starts searching for someone.
“So, we could order it on the next break and have someone grab it for us. Anyway, did anyone see Hayun?”
“Making friends, as usual,” Wonwoo comments, pointing at the other corner of the room where the girl was surrounded by four dancers.
“Hayun-ah” The leader waves her over and waits as she jogs to his side “We're talking about dinner, what do you think about-”
“Oh, those guys were talking about this new restaurant that opened downtown, I was thinking of tagging along with them” She points back at the group and watches as her members nod “But I can cancel, of course”
“No, go ahead. It's just a meal” Joshua goes to wave her off when Seungkwan approaches them with crossed arms.
“Yeah. Just a meal. Until she's suddenly ditching us during the holidays and moving out with her new friends” The boy pouts, turning his face away from the group. Hayun reaches up to ruffle his hair before landing a soft slap.
“Says the dude who is friends with half of the entertainment industry” Ignoring his eye roll, she turns back to the rest of their little huddle “Well, if nobody else will feel betrayed”
“I was kidding” Seungkwan whines and Scoups pushes her away from them “Stop being dramatic and go do your mingling”
Going back to the group of dancers, Hayun resumes chatting with them for a couple of minutes before the break is over.
After more hours of running over every tiny detail for the stage, the rehearsal finally ends and the scattering of people begins. Hayun takes a couple of minutes talking about minor adjustments with the members and just checking up on them before searching for the four friends she had made that evening.
“Hey, how do you guys plan on heading there?” She asks, taking a sip from her water bottle and missing the glances between the two boys and two girls.
“Actually, we might have to do it another day,” The girl closest to her says and flips a hair strand off of Hayun's shoulder. “We got pretty tired from this last session”
“And work tomorrow it's going to start pretty early, you know. It's best to let this go for today,” The boy nods to her before pulling out his phone from his pocket and slightly turning away from the idol.
“Yeah, I get it. That's okay, we'll reschedule it then” Hayun smiles and gives them a thumbs up “I'll head to the dorms, then. Have a good rest, and tomorrow we'll talk more”.
Sending her some quick waves and small smiles, the four dancers waited for Hayun to turn around before sharing an annoyed look and sighing.
The practice room slowly grows empty, only leaving Wonwoo and Vernon who lost an incredible game of rock, paper, scissors, and had to stay behind to clean up everything. Finally turning off the lights, the two boys head out into the hallway and spot a group of four people standing by the entrance.
“Aren't those the people Hayun was talking to earlier,” Vernon asks quietly before a voice from the group reaches them.
“Why is this damn cab taking so long? We should have let that airhead tag along”.
“Agreed. She would have talked our ears off, but at least we would have made it to the club already”.
Sharing a look, the two idols stop walking and listen closely to understand if the dancers are talking about what the boys think they're talking about.
“That was so stupid. Why would you invite her in the first place? She's so annoying”.
“I mean, having an idol considering you a friend would be fun, right? Especially with the Christmas season coming up. Can you imagine the gifts she would buy us?”
“Yeah, dude. We wouldn't even need to worry about paying for stuff anymore. Just have Hayun tag along anywhere and, boom, no more tabs to pay.”
“But also, no more functioning eardrums”
“No, you have a point. She seems like she'd give us her credit card password on the third time we hung out. Not to mention, looking at her position in contrast with ours. You don't even have to befriend her, but be on her good side, and she'll make sure to give us more gigs within Pledis”.
Standing frozen, Wonwoo and Vernon listened to everything they were saying and shared looks of disbelief. Having enough of it, the oldest cleared his throat and slung his bag, making it hit his own back with enough force to make a thumping sound.
“Let's go, Vernon,” He ignored the four people standing before them with wide eyes and resumed walking. Once shoulder to shoulder with one of the dancers, Wonwoo stopped again and said while looking ahead, “Next time, be careful of whom you're talking about”.
Vernon, on the other hand, made eye contact with each dancer before raising one eyebrow and following the oldest. After closing the car door, he groaned annoyed, “Can you believe they had… ”
“… the fucking audacity” Jeonghan places his cup on the table, face showcasing utter disgust after Wonwoo told him what they had listened before leaving the Pledis building.
“Show me who those people are again tomorrow. I'll make sure they never step inside our practice room, ever again,” Hoshi points out.
“Is there a way of not having them tomorrow? I'm afraid Scoups Hyung might commit murder” Dokyeom brought attention to the leader standing on the corner of the kitchen.
Looking like he was plotting an illegal act, Seungcheol scoffs and pushed himself away from the cabinets. “The bare minimum you would expect from someone is that they can be professional. I swear, those people are getting an earful for talking about Hayun within a billion-meter ratio from where I work”.
“It's best to let it rest until tomorrow's performance is done. After we'll probably never see them again, so there's not much point causing any visible disturbance.” Laying a hand on the leader's arm, Woozi tried to make some sort of sense, but all it did was cause Scoups to roll his eyes.
“We can't just act like nothing happened”
“We also can't change anything about the choreography until then” Hoshi butts in and takes a breath trying not to jump in the 'let's hunt them down' train.
“They already know Wonwoo and Vernon heard them trash-talking her, so I'm not letting them have it easy tomorrow.” Jeonghan rolls his eyes and pointed to both Woozi and Hoshi, “I'm speaking my mind the first moment I see those sons of bitches, you're free to wait until the show's over”.
“About that, I don't think we should tell Hayun what happened” Joshua, who had been quiet the entire time, speaks, drawing attention to him. “Not until, as you said, the show is over, and we won't see them again. You know that she's probably going to get disappointed about it”.
“And you expect her to not go running to meet her new 'friends' once we arrive at the venue?” Wonwoo raises an eyebrow, but Mingyu shakes his head and backs the older up.
“We just have to keep her entertained around us. Fill in Dino, Seungkwan, and Myungho later, and have them help with making sure the group doesn't run into her”.
Raising his hand, Vernon casually mumbles “Maybe don't tell Seungkwan, he won't be able to hide his feelings about the whole thing”
“Myungho won't either” Jun comments and the room falls silent at the sound of the remaining members chatting and approaching the kitchen.
“Wow, you make a meeting and forget to call in the main characters” Hayun laughs walking through the room and opening the fridge for a beer “So, when's the food arriving?”
~
Hayun is sitting on the makeup chair, casually watching Scoups and Jeonghan whispering to each other from the mirror's reflection, when a hand lands on her shoulder and another holds out a smoothie for her.
“Whatcha thinking about?” Joshua sits on the chair next to her while Mingyu punctures the drink's lid with a straw.
Without taking her eyes off the mirror, she nods with her head to it. “Those two are up to something”
“Scoups and Jeonghan Hyung? Nah, they're always like that. Sharing secrets and stuff,” Mingyu giggles, shoving the straw inside her mouth and shifting to stand in front of the mirror. “Cute nail polish, when did you have time to get it done?”
“Oh, these are acrylics. This lady was just putting them on” Hayun falls into his trap and began analyzing the design with some occasional comments from the boys.
Peace has seemingly set inside the dressing room, yet it doesn't last long until Dino's loud “Uh?” caught the attention of the members, who turned to see what he and Vernon were doing.
Trying to shut the youngest up, Vernon makes it very obvious to the guys that he had just filled Dino in with the “frenemies” situation. Most of them try to brush it off and not bring more attention to it. Seungkwan, however, approaches them by, very loudly, asking what's up.
“What are you talking about?” He boringly fixes up his outfit. Vernon can feel the burning eyes of Jeonghan on his skull as he tries to deviate the conversation to another topic.
“Did you go see catering already? I heard they had a coffee machine”.
“Wait. Does he not know what happened?” Dino fails to read the room properly and instigates the older boy.
“What happened? Why is everyone sharing secrets all of a sudden? Is the thing you're discussing why Scoups Hyung seems ready to jump someone”.
The timing of events can't be worse, as the makeup artist taps Hayun's shoulder to let her know they were done. Within seconds, the girl gets up and turns to where the three youngest were standing.
“What's with the gossiping? Did Vernon lose his airpods again?” She brushes away from Joshua as he tried to hold her in place and waves off Mingyu when, in a panic, he suggests they should check out the pigeons outside.
“What? No! I mean, yeah! How unfortunate, isn't it?” Vernon jumps around his answers and tries looking for anyone willing to help him out.
“Just tell her about it” Approaching them from the door, Jeonghan, now without the leader's company, shrugs his shoulders, making Hayun raise an eyebrow.
“Jeonghan, at least wait until the day is over,” Joshua speaks through his teeth and the boy rolls his eyes.
“Well, she already knows something is up, and to be fair I don't know what good hiding this will bring. At least, if she feels like doing something about it, she'll have the chance right now”.
“Do something about it? Hadn't we agreed that the best is to wait until the performance is over and just never see them again?”
“What even are you talking about?” Hayun shuts them both up and Jeonghan and Joshua turned to her with annoyed expressions, “Don't even look at me like that. You're the ones mentioning me as if I'm not in the room”.
Placing a hand on her shoulder, Joshua tilts his head a little and speaks softly, “Trust me for a moment here, it's best if you brush it aside. Until later at least, and then we can settle it as you wish”.
“Wha- Just spill it out for fucks sake. I'm going to combust if you don't tell me right now whatever this all means,” Hayun puffs, punching his shoulder. Just as Joshua opens his mouth to say the same thing again, Jeonghan beats him and shoves himself in front of the girl.
“Do you recall those dancers you were planning to go out with yesterday? Yeah, well, turns out they're all little shits who were trash-talking you, and just overall talking crap, yesterday”
“Jeonghan” Joshua repressed the older who does nothing but wave him off.
“Doesn't matter what they said because you're nothing of it, and-” Adverting his eyes for a second, Jeonghan stares to the side, where half of Scoups' body is waving for him through the door. “And, and, you're amazing and all of that. So now go rest your awesome self while I go teach those punks a lesson”.
Zooming past her, Jeonghan runs to the door, where the leader is already back outside. Hoshi, Jun, Woozi, and DK, scream for him before also going out of the door. A very lost, Seungkwan, simultaneously tries to get Vernon to tell him what exactly the dancer said before while shouting for the older to wait for him to also speak his mind.
“I didn't want you to know about this before the performance, but-”
“Whatever, let's make sure nobody dies today” Hayun rolls her eyes and turns around, Wonwoo running from where he was watching everything and holding her by the shoulder.
“Do you want us to go fix that up? It's okay to give them the cold shoulder or just go off if you want to” Nodding, she keeps silent and walks out, bringing the rest of the guys behind her.
The8, who also had just found out about the situation, whispers to Vernon, “Can you believe they had the audacity?”
“I know, right?” The youngest whisper-yelled at him as they made it to the hallway and assessed the situation.
“The next time you even think about opening your mouth to talk about her-” Scoups had his finger pointing at the tallest dancer -who ironically had a few centimeters on him-, while the rest of the members stood next to him nodding and calmly listening to what the leader was saying.
“Oppa, just drop it,” Hayun shouts, walking past them and holding his shoulder.
Annoyingly, Scoups rolled his eyes and turned to her, “What do you mean, drop it?” Thinking for a second, he blinked and turned even more bothered, “Who even told you about this?”
The leader looked around until he found Mingyu, offending the tall guy who made an X in front of his body.
“Doesn't matter who told me. Let's just not lose time doing this” Brushing past him, Hayun now faced the dancers “Look, I'll teach you something right now, so grab it or drop it okay? I don't give a shit that you don't like me, or whatever, but at least be professional because all this situation did was teach me that none of you care about your careers. It's pretty clear by the angry puppy beside me that you just lost any chance of growing inside our brand, so keep this as a lesson and respect the artists you're working with. Also, once we're on stage put on a smile, so my fans won't be able to sense your shit”
“It should be pretty clear by what she said but you definitely don't have a chance to work with any Pledis artist again” Hoshi came from the end of the hallway alongside their manager and choreographer. The latter nodded and added.
“For the sake of the performance, you should all go back to your dressing rooms. You all said whatever was on your mind, so try to refocus during the last few minutes you have”.
“I didn't get to say what was on my mind” While the group was dispersing, DK mumbles on the side and Jun snorts.
“You had a chance, but all you did was stare at them and scowl until Scoups Hyung took the lead”
“I don't care about who said and who didn't say what they wanted” Hayun rolled her eyes, turning to the boys as they arrived in the room. Clasping her hands together, she brings them to her face and smiles, “You all care about me”.
“The fact you still doubted about it after years hurts me” Dokyeom held his chest and frowned, the girl laughs and goes to hug him.
“Group hug?” Seungkwan says uncertainly and Hoshi nods, dragging Woozi with him, “Group hug!”
288 notes · View notes
takaraphoenix · 3 years
Note
Ship game!! What about Nico and Will?? It’s pretty popular, but I don’t think I’ve seen you write much of it…
That's an interesting one in that I have vocalized my reasons for disliking it way back when it first became popular but instead of just linking that, it has been years so I think it's time for an updated version.
Firstly: This post is gonna be properly tagged and not crosstagged so if any shipper comes across it and feels the need to bitch about it, just don't; your lack of curating your own tumblr experience is not my problem! ;D
Now, there are three key factors that play into my dislike of this ship: How it was written, what it represents, how the fandom around it acts.
1. It’s rushed and uncomfortable
In BoO, it was incredibly rushed. They had literally five sentences of interactions before they walked into the literal sunset together. Five. It was just entirely born from Riordan's Noah's Ark Complex, where he just can't let people be single. The series was ending and he needed Nico to have an endgame so he rushed into some random romance with zero build-up.
The way their interactions went down was also severely uncomfortable for me. Will was acting so offended by Nico not wanting to go to camp and be friends in an entitled way that he had no right to be, he downright guilt-tripped Nico about how he had wanted to be friends. Nico has been just so severely traumatized at such a young age and his coping mechanism, as unhealthy as it was, was to run away and hide. Will acted like Nico not wanting to form attachments to people who could potentially leave him again was somehow just an Edgy Emo Decision and not a direct reaction to his trauma. His entire approach to Nico was basically all these hippie posts of "Don't have depression!! Just go out into the sun and stop being depressed!", which is already a bad take with non-medical people but he's supposed to be a doctor (and let's not get into the shadiness of him technically being Nico's doctor).
There is also an inherent "I can fix him" angle to this ship and to me, only few ship dynamics are more uncomfortable than that. If you want to fundamentally change a person's behavior and personality, you... don't actually want to be with this person.
Now, here's where my points overlap, because the following parts of their writing that bothers me also stand for what this ship fundamentally represents.
2. Solangelo is a queer ship written by and for straights
I'm a queer woman and as a queer woman, I want queer wish-fulfillment, not what straights want out of queerness. I'm kind of tired of that, I've been sitting through it for enough decades now. That's, of course, not to say that no straight writer can give proper queer representation, but far too often do straight writers - even the most well-meaning ones - project straight desires of queerness into their queer representation.
Let me explain that closer through this ship.
Nico's been in love with Percy for years and I'm going to do my best to not hijack this post with some Percico agenda; that's not what this his about, this isn't some "my ship is better than your ship" ship-war nonsense. It's simply a canonical fact that Nico has had romantic feelings for another character for years.
A character who, in this medium, is heterosexual. And if you're queer, you've been there. In love with your straight best friend. It's a cliche, but it's a cliche for a reason.
We have also all been well-meaningly rejected by said straight friend.
And here's the straight desires for you: The queer person who was in love with a straight person just immediately stops having those feelings and will then as quickly as possible fall in love with the next queer person they meet to be happy and no longer uncomfortably in love with a straight person, because that thought makes the straights uncomfortable.
Queer wish-fulfillment would be for Percy to return those feelings, for the queer character to get his first love, to not be rejected. That thing queer teens always dreamed about for themselves.
Aside from the wish-fulfillment angle, the pacing is another problem. Let me repeat, Nico was in love for years. But a five sentence conversation with Will once causes a crush on Will and we see him physically turn away from Percy and toward Will just immediately to rebound and actually fall out of love with Percy and in love with Will. Anyone who's ever been unlucky in love will attest to just how unrealistic and ridiculous the pacing here is.
It's also straight queerness in another respect; Nico has been the first ever queer character we meet in that world. He loves a straight guy - and to get over that, we introduce the second queer character. Because heaven forbid there are multiple queers to pick from. No, in straight-written queer romances, there is always that one main queer and then they introduce a second one and the two just immediately hit it off and develop a romance like all a queer person needs to form attraction to someone is the confirmation that the other person shares your sexuality.
Also the notable gay guy on gay guy ship here, whereas the more queer-wish-fulfillment option would have also included more nuance to the queer experience, because Percy doesn't have to be heterosexual just because he has only been with girls so far. It's a very old-fashioned - think 90s and early 2000s - kind of straight-written queerness that there are only exactly two homosexuals and that those two homosexuals then pair up.
And, listen, I'm not immune to these outdated straight-written queers entirely, I have many such ships that I grew up with that I am still fond of because they were groundbreaking at that time and they weren't outdated yet back when they happened in said 90s and early 2000s. I am however a grown woman now and just like I have grown, so has queer rep so I am not as easily baited into falling onto my knees in gratitude for canon rep. You have to go with the times. And this ship, by all that is given to us, is just entirely outdated straight-written rep.
Which, I mention earlier that even straight-written rep can be good. If the author tries. Riordan doesn't really try though; he does the bare minimum when he writes any of his rep - and there have been many, many more qualified voices being very vocal about his depiction of people of color and, as a woman, I've been vocal about his depiction of women. I don't want to derail this post with all of that, but I do think that it bears mentioning that Riordan doing rep but only doing a bare minimum and not putting in the necessary work to deepen the representation he wants to give is a repeating pattern that has been pointed out many times by now.
(I’d also like to point out that no, it is not just the ship and not just the listed instances that make it straight-written rep for straights. It’s Nico’s entire queer arc, starting with his forced coming out. A severely traumatizing event that is completely brushed over because the straight author doesn’t understand the impact this has on queer people. Not to mention the framework; Nico’s coming out isn’t Nico’s story, it happens in Jason’s POV, it is given to us through the POV of the straight bystander who gets to be Best Ally by assuring Nico that being gay is okay. This kind of coming out is not a queer wish-fulfillment, it’s a straight wish-fulfillment of getting to be the straight savior, the ally to show the gay the light of acceptance. And, additional to the ridiculous pacing of how fast Nico gets over his love for Percy, Nico also gets over years of internalized homophobia just because of, I don’t know, Jason’s few encouraging words and the fact that Will paid attention to him? For a gay kid who was in the closet all his life, the nonchalant way in which he publicly confessed his crush to Percy at the end made absolutely no sense and was written as basically a joke, finished off with Nico literally high-fiving Percy’s girlfriend despite those two never having seen eye to eye before but this is straight wish-fulfillment so all straights are Super Allies, because that’s the way straights want to see themselves, even though Annabeth has shown before just how jealous she can be and she most definitely wouldn’t go around high-fiving people who confess to her boyfriend. Nothing about Nico’s queer arc in HoO felt natural or queer or satisfying.)
Sure, Solangelo on a surface level is big because it's a canon queer couple in a YA book-series and kudos for that and yay for the kids who get to grow up seeing queers in YA books, but I actually do think that kids growing up with books written in the 2010s shouldn't grow up with 1990s levels of representation, because the 2010s overall are actually at a far more nuanced and better level of representation when it comes to queerness. And I do reserve the right to quit on too straight-written and too outdated queer rep in a landscape where I can get more satisfying representation elsewhere; we don’t live in times anymore where you necessarily have to love every bit of rep because it’s the only one you get.
Now that we've gone through my first two gripes, let's wrap this up with the final point, because it also directly ties into this.
3. The new wave of antis hiding behind this ship
A huge part of the fandom is so busy kissing Riordan's ass solely for giving them queer rep at all they think that both the author and the ship are beyond flawless and that kind of attitude is not good. Just because an author includes rep doesn't make either perfect. Absolutely no one is beyond critique - especially not when said critique comes from the very people the author is representing. And even beyond any "valid" critique on the ship, quite frankly, someone should also be allowed to just not like it, without any reasons given at all.
But there is a certain... protective obsessiveness about this ship that doesn't allow a not liking. Very similar to how PJO bore this mindset around Perc/abeth already. It's okay to have OTPs, even OTPs that you have a blindspot for and just don't want to see any flaws in. It is however not okay to then go around attacking people who don't like the thing and mind their own business.
Solangelo's bred a new generation of antis in this fandom. And, particularly with the fact that this post too receives an "anti" tag, I feel like there needs to be a clarification (because tumblr likes to forget what actually makes an anti). Not liking something doesn't make you an anti, venting in properly tagged posts doesn't either; it's the people who harass others, who seek out the content they dislike to then complain that it even exists and who actively try to make others stop creating for it - those are antis.
And with Solangelo's popularity, there was a high rise in Percico antis, who sought it out, were unnecessarily nasty about it, harrassed creators and tried to enforce some kind of "Solangelo supremacy" that won't allow other ships for the characters.
I've been in fandom long enough to be perfectly aware that not all Solangelo shippers count into this category and that there are completely normal and nice Solangelo shippers, but this is a Venn diagram where the overlap between Solangelo shippers and antis is too large to not widely associate the nasty people with the ship itself. (I've been there myself, shipping the very ship behind which a fandom's antis all hid. The second-hand embarrassment of having these people give the ship a bad name is horrendous and I do feel bad for all the normal Solangelo shippers.)
The more often I encountered these people, who made Percico bad (sometimes in wildly ridiculous manners that bent and deliberately misinterpreted canon) and who in the same breath praised Solangelo high, the more tired I grew of that ship. It's a simple game of association, really. You see that linked to the gross and nasty behavior and you start associating the ship itself with that gross and nasty behavior - and with all the things I said before that already weighed into my dislike of the ship, this just was the final tipping point, really.
And that's it. That sums up why I dislike Solangelo. It was hastily rushed, uncomfortable in its execution, it is outdated rep that very much feels as straight-written as it factually is and it does not feel aimed at me as a queer person but rather at the straight audience and it has gathered a cult following of quite uncomfortable people who on their own would be reason enough to avoid it so you can avoid them.
Send me a ship and I will explain why I do or don't ship it
261 notes · View notes
Text
Say That Again? Pt. 2
After the door slammed shut, you all turned to fix Josh with a stare. He gingerly touched his eye and winced before huffing through his nose and closing his eyes.
“So, was that worth it, Josh? He was walking away,” Danny finally exclaimed breaking the silence. 
The atmosphere around you guys felt like it was pressing down on your shoulders and your own anger was brewing at Josh for not knowing when to shut up and Jake for not knowing how to settle an argument in a more mature way. 
‘He’s not just your brother Josh. He’s your fucking twin and we all know you pulled out all the stops that would hurt his feelings, so I hope your fucking face hurts,” Sammy yelled as he stomped to the door finally pursuing the younger twin. 
You wanted to go after Jake, but the fight had affected both of them and it couldn’t be ignored that Josh’s feelings were hurt too. Without saying anything, Josh sat down in the middle of the floor while bringing his knees up to rest his elbows on. With a sigh of your own, you sat next to him on one side while Danny sat on the other while all of you waited to see who would speak first. Josh clearly wasn’t going to when he put his forehead on his forearms. 
“So, what was that fight really over, Josh,” you asked gently while putting your hand on his back. 
‘I-I don’t know. I just felt so angry and it felt like Jake wasn’t listening to me and-I just lost it,” He rushed out while his chin trembled slightly. You and Danny didn’t really know how to respond. You rubbed your hand gently up and down his back while it became apparent Josh was trying not to cry.
“God. What have I done? All of this is Jake’s dream. The band and the music is Jake’s dream and I literally just took that away from him,” Josh said sadly as the first tears began to fall.
It was the next day before you had gotten to talk to Jake, but he was avoiding his brother like the plague. None of you had ever seen him so angry at any of his siblings before. Every time any of you tried to talk to him about the fight, band be damned, Jake would shut all of you down with a nasty look that made it clear he wasn’t in the mood to talk whatsoever. When Sam called Karen for advice, she was even at a loss for words other than they would figure it out eventually.
You were sitting next to Jake on the couch while he lazily flipped through a book. When Sam finally found him after he stormed off, Jake had been packing his bags to leave and it took the youngest Kiszka nearly crying himself to make him stop, but from what you had heard, it seemed like Jake’s mind may have been made up either way.
“Jake-“ you started, but he quickly cut you off.
“I don’t want to talk about it. I thought I had made that crystal clear by this point,” he said dismissively as he flipped to the next page in his book. After a couple minutes, you yanked the book out of his hand forcing him to give you his full attention. Jake shot you a death glare and clenched his jaw out of frustration.
“You can’t ignore it. Josh has been trying to talk to you all morning and if you’re so hell bent on leaving the band, then you owe him and the rest of the boys the minimum of having that conversation,” you spat out fuming.
“Why do I owe Josh anything? I started this band. He didn’t even want to be in it,” Jake said with exasperation and threw his hands in the air.
“Exactly. Josh gave up his dream for yours. At least hear what he has to say, Jacob.”
Much like before, Jake got up and left the room. Once again walking away from the problem.
Almost three days had passed since the fight and Jake still hadn’t spoken to his twin brother. By this point, management had begun to notice, and Sam and Danny told them it would best for the twins to reconcile on their own. Thankfully, they listened for the time being, but Greta Van Fleet was still expected to perform and make public appearances, even if some of the members weren’t speaking to each other.
Especially since they had an incredibly important interview coming up.
Not wanting to rub salt in the wound or force the twins together and potentially make matters worse, management decided it would be best to make them individual interviews to avoid any awkward tension that followed the twins these days.
It didn’t take the boys long to get ready. Like usual, Sam answered the questions he wanted with honesty and deflected others with humor. Danny always played the mystery card, but it just made him more endearing to the two interviewers.
Josh was up to bat and you stood off to the side and watched. Knowing them well, you could see how nervous he was not doing an interview with Jake. He could do it, but it wasn’t his preference. It all started out pretty normal. Josh gave long winded answers, offered kind smiles while remaining cryptic when he was asked about the new album.
“So, what’s it like being the front man of Greta Van Fleet? I mean, you basically are Greta Van Fleet,” one of the interviewers asked. Josh nodded his head and licked his lips as he began to formulate a response. He let out a small of puff of air and his cheeks flushed in slight irritation.
“I’m not the front man of the band. I might be the vocalist, but there’s a reason I don’t call myself the lead singer,” Josh chuckled out awkwardly. “Actually, Jake is the reason there even is a Greta Van Fleet and he’s the mastermind behind it all. At the end of the day, Jake doesn’t even need to have me in the band. He’s not only a phenomenal musician, but he’s a great singer too. I’m here because this is Jake’s dream and that makes it my dream too.”
The interviewers seemed shock at this revelation and you’re heart felt warmed at Josh’s confession. Sam nudged Jake’s shoulder as if to non-verbally say “I told you so, asshole.”
Jake chewed on his bottom lip as he watched his twin continue to fidget slightly uncomfortably. You watched his resolve melt away entirely as Jake quickly stepped forward, interrupting the interview and taking a seat next to Josh who looked at him gratefully for the intervention.
“Well, in opposition to his opinion…” Jake started and the interviewers rolled with the sudden change and laughed at the Jake’s phrasing. The natural energy between the twins was unmatched and you, Danny and Sam felt relief rush through your bodies as you all watched them interact as if the fight had never happened. Your heart was truly warmed when Jake reached over, grabbing Josh’s hand and squeezed his fingers quickly before pulling away.
All was forgiven. At least for now.
95 notes · View notes
cobrakaisb · 3 years
Text
modern day romeo and juliet part 2
Tumblr media
read part one here!
a/n: here is the largely anticpated part two of the imagine! after getting numerous asks begging for a part two, i decided to finally publish it. sorry it took me so long besties but school and softball have been kicking my ass lately. love you all!!! 
summary: you and hawk are going strong but your friendship with sam and demetri has fallen apart, or has it. (also warning: reader gets a bloddy nose in this imagine if that bothers you in anyway don’t read)
word count: 1,711
“so are you and hawk like together now?” moon asked as the two of you walked to the cafeteria. “yeah,” you answered, a light blush coating your cheeks. “oh my gosh yes! i’m so happy for you!” she shouted, wrapping her arms around your shoulders, squeezing tightly. “thanks moon,” you replied half-heartedly. moon immediately picked up on your sad demeanor, “what's wrong?” “nothing,” you answered, giving her a fake smile. moon was going to call your bluff, but she was interrupted by hawk. “hey guys,” he greeted, pulling you into a tight hug. 
“hi hawk,” you replied, arms wrapped around his waist as he swayed you back and forth. “are you sitting with us at lunch?” he asked, looking at you. “yeah probably. your friends won’t mind right?” you asked. hawk immediately shook his head no, the two of you just staring at each other intensely. “you guys are so cute! i’ll see you later y/n,” moon announced, walking away from you and hawk. the two of you pulled apart, hands intertwined as he led you over to the cobra kai table. 
“anything from sam?” hawk asked quietly. you gently shook your head, causing hawk to frown. he placed a gentle kiss on your forehead, “she’ll come around,” he assured. “i hope so,” you mumbled as the two of you sat down at the cobra kai table. your sad mood was immediately lifted however when doug and big red started throwing napkins at you. 
“i can’t believe she’s actually sitting with him,” demetri said, appalled at the fact that you were sitting with hawk at lunch. “why wouldn’t she be sitting with hawk? they’re together now,” moon said, a happy smile on her face as she watched you laugh from your spot next to him at the cobra kai table. “i still can’t believe that. how could y/n even like someone like him?” sam asked, angrily stabbing at her lunch with a fork. moon’s eyes widened as she watched sam. “aren’t you happy for her?” moon asked, confusion clear in her voice. 
sam scoffed at moon’s words. “why would i be happy that she’s fraternizing with the enemy?” sam asked. “the enemy? do you even hear yourself?” moon asked sam, and even demetri looked surprised by sam’s words. sam was silent, shooting a sad look your way. “you regret it don’t you?” demetri accused sam, but she just remained silent, looking down at her lunch. “regret what? what did you guys do?” moon asked. 
“when we caught y/n and hawk kissing at your party a while back, we may have kicked her out of miyagi-do,” demetri mumbled, feeling ashamed by their actions. “are you kidding me!” moon yelled, causing some heads to turn, but she just shooed them off with a wave of her hand. “that’s why y/n has been so down lately? because you kicked her out of karate?” moon asked, while demetri and sam just nodded. “you guys are the worst,” she continued. “thanks for reminding us,” sam mumbled, sparing a glance at you. 
you were laughing at something that doug had said. “that’s too funny,” you mumbled between laughs. the boys just laughed at how funny you found doug’s joke, when in reality it wasn’t meant to be that funny. “i can’t believe that you’re in miyagi-do y/n. you’re nothing like those dorks,” doug said. you tensed up at his words, and hawk took immediate notice. he glared at doug, ready to tell him off, but you beat him to it. “i’m actually not in miyagi-do any more. they kicked me out,” you said sadly. the boys all looked around in embarrassment. “but it’s whatever because i have a boyfriend and all the children we adopted now,” you joked, holding up peace signs.
“what kids did we adopt?” hawk asked, confusion clear in his voice. “literally everyone here. they are all out children,” you explained, gesturing to the table full of boys. the boys all burst into laughter while hawk just wrapped his arm around your shoulders, pulling you into his side. you rest your head on his shoulder, placing a small kiss on his neck. “ew! imagine having to watch your parents do that!” doug shouted jokingly, throwing a fruit snack your way. everyone laughed at him, and soon lunch was over.        
--
“hawk! wait for me!” you shouted, walking out of the locker room dressed for gym class. hawk immediately stopped walking, waiting for you to catch up to him. “hi!” you said, giggling as he peppered small kisses all over your face. “hawk let’s go!” one of his friends yelled from up ahead. hawk grabbed your hand, intertwining your fingers, as he pulled you towards the front of his squad. 
together the group of you walked onto the soccer field. of course the boys were being confident, walking with their heads held high. you just rolled your eyes at them and their cocky behavior. “alright let’s remember to keep the aggression to a minimum due to the school’s new policy,” the gym teacher shouted as she blew the whistle signaling the start of the soccer game. 
almost immediately, sam and the other miyagi-do students were blatantly going for the cobra kai boys. you noticed that doug was about to retaliate but hawk held him back, mumbling something, which clearly calmed him down. the game continued, and hawk scored a goal. you cheered loudly for him, and he just winked at you, causing you to blush. the game went on, and each dojo was getting progressively more aggressive. you were running down the field when someone called you name, causing you to turn around. the next thing you knew, the soccer ball was flying towards your face. you didn’t have anytime to cover your face, and so you got hit in the face with the ball. 
“what the fuck!”  you shouted, hands flying up to your nose which was now gushing blood. “y/n!” hawk called from across the field, running over to you. “baby let me see it,” he demanded, pulling your hands away from your face. he removed your hands, and tilted your head back to help stop the flow of blood. “who did this?” hawk asked loudly, glaring at everyone around him. when nobody answered he shouted even louder, “who did it?” this time sam stepped forwards. “it was an accident, i swear,” she rushed, looking nervously between you and hawk. 
hawk rolled his eyes at sam, his jaw and fists clenching. “yeah i’m sure it was,” he growled, taking a threatening step towards her. “hawk!” you shouted, but he ignored you. “i-” sam started but she was cut off by hawk. “what? kicking her out of karate wasn’t enough? i get it that you guys don’t like me, but just because we’re together doesn’t mean that you should punish her for it. especially since we’re happy. don’t come near her again!” he finished, and you couldn’t help but swoon. he’s defending my honor. that’s so hot, you thought.  
after his conversation with sam, hawk took you to the nurse’s office. she just gave you an ice pack and some paper towels, before sending you back to class. you and hawk were walking to your next class when sam and demetri approached the two of you. “i thought i told you to stay away from her,” hawk said, stepping forward but you stopped him by placing your hand on his chest. hawk huffed, but stayed quiet. it was silent between the four of you, all of you just staring at each other. “was there something you guys needed?” you asked. 
demetri cleared his throat. “yeah we were hoping to talk to you. preferably without your boyfriend,” he said and hawk tried to step forward but you stopped him once again. “yeah that’s fine. i’ll see you in class babe,” you answered, kissing hawk’s cheek before shooing him away. once he walked down the hall, and was far enough away from you, you looked towards demetri and sam. “what was it that you wanted to talk about?” you asked, crossing your arms. 
“we wanted to invite you back to miyagi-do. it was wrong of us to kick you out,” sam said, not making eye contact with you. you scoffed at her words. “why should i even come back? you guys made it pretty clear that you didn’t want me there,” you said. “that’s because you’re dating hawk of all people!” sam shouted at you, and you glared at her. “sam! we came to make amends not cause more problems!” demetri interjected, glaring at the larusso girl. 
“look y/n, i’m sorry, for everything. i know that you really like hawk, and that the two of you are happy together. and,” demetri started, taking a deep breath, “if you’re happy then i’m happy for you. i understand if you don’t want to come back to miyagi-do or even be our friend, but i just want you to know that i’m sorry for everything, nose included.” you smiled at demetri’s apology. “thanks demetri, that means a lot. i don’t think that i’ll come back to karate, but i’d love it if we could try and fix our friendship,” you said, looking at him. “yeah, i’d like that,” demetri answered, a big smile on his face. 
the two of you turned to face sam, who remained silent the whole time. “i’m sorry too y/n. i never should’ve kicked you out of miyagi-do for being with hawk, especially since you guys are great together. and i’m sorry for your nose. i’ve been such a bitch to you, and i understand if you don’t accept my apology, but i would like to be friends again,” sam apologized, looking at you shyly. you smiled softly at the girl, “i’d like that.” sam smiled back at you. you all knew that things were going to be different now, and this isn’t something that you were just going to forgive and forget, but you were all willing to make amends and that’s all that matters. 
you walked into your next class, taking your seat next to hawk, with a smile on your face. “everything okay?” he asked, looking you over. “everything’s perfect,” you answered, kissing him softly.  
331 notes · View notes
bestworstcase · 3 years
Text
on ‘villainy’ and varian’s and cassandra’s moral codes
for all that varian’s and cassandra’s villain arcs get compared to death they’re really more different than they are similar, and i think one of the more interesting distinctions is the characters’ moral perspectives on their own actions--namely that varian recognizes his own choices as villainous and consciously self-identifies as a ‘bad guy’ and cassandra not only…doesn’t do that but appears legitimately taken aback when varian says she’s ‘become the villain.’ from this we can infer that varian is transgressing his own personal sense of right and wrong while cassandra isn’t.
and… well with varian i think it’s pretty straightforward: he’s a kid who desperately wants to make the world a better place and make his father proud, but his impulsivity and recklessness and general disregard for lab safety foil his plans and get him into trouble. then one of his accidents puts his dad into what is essentially a magical coma and varian becomes singularly focused on reviving him--and, when he realizes that the king is more invested in covering up the problem than fixing it and his only hope lies with a zealously guarded relic belonging to the kingdom, he decides that the only way to achieve this goal is to start breaking the rules.
so he asks rapunzel--his friend who promised to help him--to retrieve some information the king is trying to steal from him, and then persuades her to help him access the sundrop vault; then when she balks at stealing it he makes it clear that he no longer trusts her and escapes with the flower. at this point he’s in the morally dubious zone; being strategic about what he tells rapunzel to make sure she helps him, spiking cookies with truth serum to sow chaos and get information he needs, and doing things that are crimes on paper but also largely victimless. i think these were things varian could probably rationalize as okay--not exactly good, but no one got hurt and he got what he needed.
except the flower’s magic is gone. he drugged the palace, manipulated rapunzel and broke her trust in him, and committed treason all for something useless because the actual magic of the sundrop is in rapunzel herself. now he’s in trouble, because he needs rapunzel’s help but his desperate measures guaranteed she won’t be willing to help him again. and this is when varian realizes that his only options are 1. give up on saving his dad and turn himself in and hope rapunzel takes pity on him, or 2. accept that no one is going to help him now and do whatever it takes to free quirin himself.
so--mutating ruddiger, attacking the city, kidnapping arianna and threatening her with encasement in amber, building an automaton army to defend him while he works--these are all things that varian feels are wrong, but chooses to do anyway because he doesn’t trust that anyone else will even try to save his father. despite his anger and his rationalizations, at the end of the day varian sees himself as doing bad things for good reasons. (“Believe me, I know/I’ve sunk pretty low” & “I’m the bad guy, that’s fine”)
and when his reasons fall through--when he fails to free his dad--he falls quickly into guilt and despair over having hurt people for nothing. he stews for a year in how unforgivable and ashamed he feels, and even when he teams up with the separatists, he’s doing it in, basically, pursuit of a reset button: he wants to take back what he did. and when rapunzel shows him that he can be forgiven, he can have a second chance, he does have people who are willing to help him and trust him again, he drops the memory-wiping idea and his alliance with the separatists without a second thought--because what rapunzel actually does is give him a way to pursue his goals without sacrificing his conscience, which is what he really needed the whole time.
now, cassandra, on the other hand…
cass is an interesting character in this regard because, while she does want to be a hero, she’s not at all altruistic. she’s consumed by her lack of autonomy and she craves not only control over her own life but also respect from the people around her--her desire to be a hero is very self-interested, at its core. and moreover she has a somewhat fatalistic view of the world wherein some people (not her) matter and some… just don’t. 
moreover cassandra, despite her ambitions of becoming a guard, doesn’t so much as blink at eugene’s or the pub thugs’ criminal pasts--she is suspicious of lance at first, but on the grounds that he’s an unrepentant thief who showed up out of the blue under suspicious circumstances to ‘reconnect’ with his old partner in crime; eugene is also distrustful of lance, for the exact same reasons--and of course she doesn’t think twice about breaking the law herself. literally one of the very first things we see cassandra do is commit treason to make her friend happy. cass doesn’t care about the law, and she only wants to be a guard because she associates getting the job with having her dad’s approval and it’s also her ticket out of lifelong servitude.
on the other hand, cass does seem have a strong sense of right and wrong where people she cares about are concerned. she is constantly putting the desires and well-being of her friends ahead of not just her ambitions (e.g. in beginnings for rapunzel, or great expotations for varian) but also her own safety (e.g. risking her livelihood and home to sneak rapunzel out for the night in bea, or setting aside her misgivings about the sketchy bird people in freebird). 
which is all to say--cass isn’t exactly amoral but the moral framework through which she sees the world is… more complicated than varian’s. she doesn’t seem particularly motivated to help strangers but she’ll move mountains to help people she cares about; she doesn’t care much about rules or laws except insofar as she doesn’t want to get caught breaking them, and she has this hierarchical mindset that some people matter--meaning, they get to make decisions for themselves and have people care about what they need and want--and some don’t, and that she herself is stuck in the latter category despite her best efforts to climb out of it.
which brings us to the subject of the moonstone, and cassandra’s villain arc, and why cass, unlike varian, doesn’t consider herself a bad person.
i think what it comes down to most is this: taking the moonstone is an act of defiance against not only rapunzel but also fate itself. waiting in the wings sets up cassandra’s resigned acceptance of this hierarchical order and her own cosmic insignificance, and then in crossing the line she REJECTS that same order. she’s raging against rapunzel but also against the cultural and legal and destined systems that put rapunzel on top and forced cass into subservience. she is very literally fighting for her freedom against the universe itself.
and when cass was not an altruistic or heavily morally motivated or even particularly law-abiding person before, and when her conscience has always been predominantly oriented around taking care of her friends first and herself second, and when the thing that drove her to this breaking point was her friends spitting that back in her face… well.
it’s easy to say “cass literally tried to murder rapunzel a bunch of times, how can she possibly believe she’s the good guy?”--but rapunzel maimed cass, blamed her for it, and consistently prioritized her destiny over cassandra’s wellbeing; and rapunzel represents the cosmic order that cass is fighting to liberate herself from. and while i know that the -popular- take on be very afraid is “cass is terrified of hurting rapunzel,” i submit it’s actually “cass is terrified of having to fight rapunzel, because she still believes that fate is literally tilted in rapunzel’s favor and she can’t win a direct fight with rapunzel.” that’s why she’s so scared; that’s why rapunzel seemingly deleting the red rocks hardens her resolve; that’s why she marches into corona with maximum drama and bluster and builds a fortress and tries so hard to mess with rapunzel’s head before the battle begins. she’s trying to even the odds. and that’s why, when rapunzel stomps her into the curb, cassandra’s immediate response is “i need an army.”
cassandra isn’t scared for rapunzel. she is scared OF rapunzel.
we do also see cass trying not to harm people she considers to be innocent bystanders; she uses the truth serum on varian bc she needs the incantation, but afterwards she doesn’t even bother to restrain him until after he starts pestering her, she says flat out that she doesn’t want him to get hurt when she fights rapunzel; similarly she is willing to hurt calliope to force rapunzel to comply, but--despite her deep personal dislike of calliope--uses a minimum amount of force and again verbally expresses that she doesn’t particularly want to hurt her, that it’s a means to an end and nothing more. attacking rapunzel? that’s fine, rapunzel is her enemy. attacking eugene? of course, he’s rapunzel’s closest ally. mind controlling the brotherhood? that kills two birds with one stone--eliminating powerful enemies with a vested interest in taking the moonstone away from her and turning them into allies who can level the playing field between her and rapunzel. and when she does finally snap and raze corona to the ground? the people of corona attacked her first. i think cass ABSOLUTELY sees herself as fighting a purely defensive war against people who have or will hurt her.
and this is, of course, ultimately why varian failed to get through to her during ‘nothing left to lose’--he appealed to her sense of morality and her sense of morality shrugged. 
as for the thing that snaps her out of it? the moment that forces her to question whether she’s really as right as she thinks she is? it’s learning who her new friend really is. it’s the shock of finding out that she’s been allied with, confiding in, taking advice from a legendary villain, from a monster she likely grew up hearing stories about. cass takes it as a given that zhan tiri is evil--and if she’s friends with zhan tiri, what does that make her? and even then, cass is resistant to the idea that she might be a villain--“No, no, I’m nothing like you. Just because I’m pursuing my destiny doesn’t make me a bad person!”--which is, ultimately, very telling of her whole mindset. she’s not a bad guy, she’s fighting for her freedom. she’s not a bad guy, she’s protecting herself against people who want to exploit her. she’s not a bad guy, she’s just putting herself first for once.
and OAH generally, i’d argue, is not actually about cassandra trying to reconcile with rapunzel or redeem herself or be a better person, it’s… literally cass trying frantically to prove she’s NOT the bad guy. it’s “oh yeah? you think i’m a bad person? well could a bad guy do THIS? *lies and impersonates a former coworker and gets up on a stage to justify her own actions in front of a crowd*” it’s “a bad guy wouldn’t apologize, rapunzel never apologized for anything, and to prove i’m a better person I’M going to apologize! see? SEE!?”--and then everyone in corona attacks her and she goes “FINE, i’m the bad guy, fuck you all” and wrecks the place.
only then--only in plus est en vous--does cassandra get into a mindset similar to varian’s, of “i am the bad guy but if i can pull this off it will be worth it.” she’s not sorry. she still sees rapunzel as an enemy trying to get her under control again, and the only thing that’s really changed is cassandra acknowledging that she has in fact done bad things too.
and… i would argue that by the end of plus est cassandra… feels some guilt but isn’t sorry. “i’ve failed” and “i’ve done terrible things” and “i tried to prove i was more than everyone thought but they were right”--her anguish is not like varian’s anguish in RR, where he was consumed with despair because no one could possibly forgive him for the things he did. cassandra is upset because she did awful things and failed and she perceives that failure as proof of her own worthlessness. she’s right back to feeling how she felt in waiting in the wings but with a hefty new helping of self-disgust and shame for having been stupid enough to believe she could change anything for herself. 
she’s not sorry. she’s not pleading for forgiveness. she just wants rapunzel to give up and leave her alone--& then, after rapunzel convinces her that she’s wrong, and she does have worth as a person, and she does have a destiny of her own, cass does what’s necessary to clean up the crisis she created and then… just bounces. she gets the freedom she wanted and leaves without a backward glance.
(which. good for her.)
tl;dr: varian’s villain arc explores his moral scruples and what it takes for him to be willing to ignore them, whereas cassandra’s villain arc explores her incendiary reaction to a lifetime of injustices; she isn’t amoral but her sense of right and wrong is, unlike varian’s, very contextual and personal. varian is a pragmatic idealist who wants to be lawful good but is capable of setting his own morals aside in pursuit of a goal he considers to be important enough, and cassandra is one radicalizing incident away from realizing that her grievances are not a unique personal failing but a systemic problem and then leading a class uprising.
71 notes · View notes