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#remember to drink water and take your medication and eat when you’re hungry
shibaraki · 9 months
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STATUS UPDATES: GOING INTO 2024
2023 has been rough for me in all manner of ways but I will say it has been very fruitful with regards to my writing. I managed surpass my goal of 100k words, reaching an unfathomable 150k at present, and I’ve even managed to hit a big milestone when it comes to my following! I’m extremely grateful to all my readers, both those that have stuck with me and those who are new, and I wish I had adequate words to really express that. but going into 2024 I will likely be writing less frequently than I did this year. this is due to my own health, and a multitude of other problems that I can no longer keep on the back burner.
plenty of you have seen mentions of hospital visits and procedures on my blog, and while I’m not very comfortable oversharing about medical stuff I do want to be transparent about the fact that I will be posting fics less because of it. I’ve been in and out of semi hiatus for the better part of 4 months but I was always awful at sticking to it. next year I want to actually give myself grace, and take care of my body.
please do not fear!!! this resolution actually aligns perfectly with my writing goals for 2024. I want to focus on lengthening my word counts. I’d love to post fewer fics, but to have said fics be 25 to 50k respectively, rather than to post a lot of 1 to 15k fics. mostly I want to work on my own impatience when it comes to writing, and berate myself less for what I think I should be doing writing-wise. I will still be around on here, and I always want to talk with you guys (and read whenever the mood strikes!!), the biggest difference is I’ll have longer projects, and you’ll have to wait for them (though if I’m honest I will likely still post a shorter fic here and there lol).
I appreciate the patience a lot of you have already shown me this year, what with my random breaks and gaps between posting. you have all been so so kind and generous with your praise and I wouldn’t be here, writing and sharing, without that support. I love you all and wish you well going into the new year!!!!!
edited: 18/12/23
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moatazboucetta · 4 months
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During the pandemic, we all were trapped inside our homes and had easy and quick access to leisure and food. This has added some extra pounds, and now that the pandemic is over, we wish to lose these extra pounds hanging. Or you have an essential occasion coming up for which you wish to lose weight in less than a month.
If your clothes from last year don’t fit you anymore, you aren’t alone. We all can easily relate. Now that you’ve finally decided to lose weight, time is not helping.
So, just like many others, you’re also here to find secrets to losing 10kgs in a month without exercising.
How To Lose 10kg In 1 Month Without Exercise
These are excellent methods for losing weight and preventing future weight gain.
Take Time to Chew Your Food
We’re always hurrying to finish our food and return to food. Therefore, our brain doesn’t get enough time to process that our stomach is full. Hence, we eat more than our body needs without even realizing it.
Chewing your food thoroughly gives your brain time to realize your stomach is full. This method leads to smaller portions and decreased food intake. There are many studies to prove that people who eat slowly have relatively lower body mass index (BMI).
Pro Tip: Count how many times you chew each bite, as this strategy will keep your mind busy.
Control Your Portion Size
The best way to do this is to carry a small plate when you take out food to eat. We’re so used to eating on a big plate that we must remember how much we’ve eaten. Smaller plates mean less food, which helps you feel full within this much.
When we use a big plate but take out a small quantity of food, it makes us think that we have not eaten enough and that there’s still space left to fill.
The best way to start practicing this habit is by putting nutrient-dense food in larger quantities and high-caloric food in smaller quantities.
Eat at Home
When you prepare your meals at home, it’s up to you to add as many nutrients to your food as you want. Many believe this is the only way to lose 10kg in less time as you decide what goes in your body.
Studies have proven that people who eat at home more than eat out lose more weight than usual. Stock up on nutrient-dense products and try a few dishes each week.
Eat Plenty of Protein
We all know how incredibly significant protein is for our appetite as it makes us feel full quickly. Not only does it reduce hunger, but you also eat fewer calories than usual. Our hormones, like ghrelin and glucagon-like peptide-1, are affected by protein as they can make you feel less hungry.
Consider boosting the protein amount of your meals if you have a grain-based breakfast. Since breakfast is the first meal of your day, focus on eating a higher amount of protein so you can keep your lunch super light.
Drink More Water
People who drink a glass of water before meals eat less food than those who don’t. Studies have shown that people who drink excess water throughout the day, especially before a meal, consume less food, significantly affecting satiety.
Bonus Tip: Replace your energy drinks and sodas with water to cut down on sugar. It will greatly impact your weight.
Cut Down on Sugar
Sugar can be your biggest enemy if you need to control its intake. It can also be one of the major causes of gaining excess weight. So, to lose extra pounds from your body in less time cut down on sugar as much as you can. It can be challenging initially as sugar can be very addictive to eliminate from your diet.
Stay far away from sugar-processed foods such as ice cream, cake pops, sodas, energy drinks, chocolates, etc.
FAQs
Is it safe to lose 10kg in one month without exercise?
If done correctly and in moderation, losing 10kg in a month is safe. We suggest not to take unadvised steps that can harm your health. We advise you to consult with a healthcare professional for weight management.
Is it safe to use medications for weight loss?
Weight loss medications are unsafe to use without medical supervision and are usually recommended to treat particular medical concerns.
Can pregnant women lose 10kgs in a month?
It is possible to lose weight being pregnant when you eat smaller portions of food and exercise daily. However, it can vary from woman to woman and their medical condition, so it’s essential to consult a women’s healthcare professional.
How to lose 1,000 calories a day?
Cycle around 1 hour at a rate of 15 mph with short breaks daily to lose approximately 1,000 calories daily. Increase the intensity of your workout and focus more on thigh fat.
Conclusion
We don’t even realize that making minor adjustments to our everyday life and eating habits can impact our weight and overall health. It doesn’t have anything to do with a particular diet plan and high-intensity workout. However, it’s beneficial to include that in your routine.
Follow these tips and notice a major difference in your weight by the end of the month.
we also suggest a good and natural product supported by many clinical studies
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swagfanland · 8 months
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Top 20 Best Weight Loss Tips for a Healthy Lifestyle
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There can be a lot of reasons for weight loss in today’s world, like any problem, a medical condition, or just the fact one needs to adapt to a healthy lifestyle. And they all are valid. And in this journey, you are not alone. Most common reasons for weight gain include stress, overreacting, and more, but you can take some important steps to overcome this stage of your life as well. If you’re looking for weight loss tips for a healthy lifestyle, then you are at the right place.
Following, you’ll find the best lifestyle tips for weight loss! Remember that you shouldn’t solely focus on weight loss, but on making sustainable lifestyle choices that will get you to healthy well-being. It is recommended to consult with your dietitian before using any new things in your daily schedule. Now, let’s get to the top lifestyle tips for weight loss!
Best Weight Loss Tips –
Drink Plenty of Water
It is recommended by doctors to drink eight- nine glasses of water a day by an average human. This is said so because drinking water can help one stay hydrated. If there is a lack of it, then one can suffer from dehydration and other problems. Among the best lifestyle tips for weight loss would be to interchange other beverages like alcohol, soda, etc. with water as a more productive item.
Do not skip meals
Skipping meals can help in weight loss is a myth. Many people do it because they think it will help them in the process by ending up hurting their bodies. Since one doesn’t eat proper timely meals or skip breakfast, they will later overeat during the day which will not only disturb the body systems but also slow down the metabolism making the body not lose weight but gain and slow down the process of shedding weight.
Get enough sleep
It is seen that an average human being should get at least seven to eight hours of sleep per night for a healthy lifestyle. If they sleep less than this amount, then it can affect their hormones, and metabolism, and affect the body more badly. It can also lead to cravings for unhealthy foods.
Include fruits and vegetables in your diet
One of the healthiest and most nutritious foods in the world includes fruits and vegetables. Both are low in calories and fulfilling for the stomach side by side. One of the most common lifestyle tips for weight loss would be to include them in your meals or eat them as a snack. They make great additions to most of the diet plans that dietitians create for their patients.
Eating high-fiber-filled food
Fiber is important for the body, and it can be found in oats, and bananas, it can help the person feel full. When a person feels they are not hungry, it will then reduce the overall calorie intake.
Do regular exercise
There are a lot of exercises like running, swimming, etc. that a person can choose from and add to their workout schedule. Regular exercises can help in boosting the metabolism, which helps in losing weight.
Find a workout friend(s)
This is a subpart of regular exercise. You can try to add a friend or family member to your workout schedule because it not only makes the whole experience of doing the exercise interesting but helps motivate you in your journey of leading a healthy lifestyle
Avoid intake of processed foods
In today’s world, it is quite difficult to totally cut processed and junk food in our fast and active life, but we can try our best to avoid them as much as we can and eat them only once in a while. These food items are high in calories and fat, while containing a very small quotient of nutrients. Many people recommend these lifestyle tips for weight loss to include whole foods in your diet instead.
Eat more protein
Proteins are just as important as other nutrients for the body. Eating proteins like eggs, chicken, etc. is not only good for the body, but it can help maintain muscle mass when you are losing weight. They are part of a balanced diet and keep a person full for a long period.
Reduce the alcohol intake
It is seen that Alcoholic beverages taken daily are not harmful to health like for kidneys, digestive system, and other parts but are often high in calories that can get between your process of shedding weight. Thus, take these drinks once in a while, if necessary, even then.
Plan your meals and advice from professionals
Have a proper appointment with your dietitian as every person’s body type is different and thus, taking a professional’s opinion and diet chart and following that will help in the process of losing weight. After following the chart, you can plan your meals according to that and in advance if you want to save time and also, avoid impulse eating.
Control portion sizes
It is recommended by a lot of people that one should have a small plate of food and small portion sizes in their meals as it helps in decreasing the chances of overeating. Lifestyle tips for weight loss would be to make food and meals at home so that you can control your portion and utensil sizes yourself.
Having a healthy breakfast
Breakfast is said to be the most important meal of the day, as it readies you for the whole day. Eat a nutritional breakfast that includes oats, proteins, fibers, fruits, etc. that help kick-start your day. Adding these food items can help in making you feel full throughout the day.
Avoid food items with added sugars
This can also be seen as a subpart of avoiding junk food as added sugars products like different desserts, pastries, and more have a high chance of contributing to health problems like gaining weight, feeling heavy, sleepiness, and more.
Join some offline or online fitness communities
Once you join these communities, you’ll meet similar people who are on the journey of a healthy lifestyle and are looking for lifestyle tips for weight loss as well, this will provide you with extra support for overall healthy growth.
Try to track your progress
Nowadays, keeping a gratitude or daily account of your activities has been seen to help calm the person. You can track your progress and write thoughts through the use of a notebook, journal, an app, or any other way that makes you feel the most comfortable expressing your feelings.
Avoid midnight snacking
Midnight snacking or Late-night snacking means after midnight after you’ve had dinner. Even if people have found healthy alternatives for this time, you should try to avoid this as midnight eating does not only come between one’s sleep schedule but adds unnecessary calories to their lifestyle.
Snack on healthy options
Have healthy snacks ready in your homes and other places where you usually have a snack at. Popular healthy snacks include fruits, nuts, and more. If you have these snacks ready at a time, then you will be able to avoid other options of unhealthy snacking
Avoid phones and TVs while eating
It is said that if you eat while using any electronic device or watching TV, you may eat more than what you want as they are distracting. Pay attention to your food and avoid these distractions, as you may overeat. This practice is called Mindful eating.
Transform to healthy lifestyle changes
Though we’ve talked about a healthy lifestyle and in terms of losing weight specifically, you must keep in mind that it won’t happen if you also don’t make other lifestyle changes that affect your overall well-being. Other processes of having a balanced diet, doing regular exercise, and other activities are just as important. Follow these Healthy lifestyle choices for weight loss, that can go a long way and improve health.
Just remember that following a healthy lifestyle may sound like a lot and requires a lot of input from the person, but it is not impossible, and it can help you today and in the future. With enough water, sleep, a balanced diet, and support from friends and family, anyone can follow a healthy lifestyle and lose weight.
These were the top 20 Best Weight Loss Tips for a Healthy Lifestyle. Save and bookmark this list, or share with your family and friends this list and follow us for more information and interesting lists and articles.
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random drabble #3
When you're throwing your guts up in the bathroom from having too many shots, and she's there to hold your hair and roast you the whole night through.
When you're staying up late to finish three entire art exam pieces but go to bed disappointed because you could barely keep your eyes open, to find your exhausted parents greeting you with finished pieces the next morning.
When you're out and about the town and the group makes sure they're not leaving you behind.
When you're staying in class during lunch cus you're never hungry these days, and he skips pizza day just to hang with you and make sure you're okay and at least drink some water or eat a banana.
When they drive to your house in the middle of the night and buy you mcdonalds after hearing how your heart got broken into a million pieces by some boy who didn't deserve you.
When they say "Congratulations" and "I'm so proud of you" and they really mean it, without malice or envy in their hearts.
When they ask if you've eaten anything today or tell you to keep warm cus the forecast said it was going to be cold later.
When she lets you have the last cheese fry even though she's obsessed with cheese fries but genuinely wants to enjoy them with you.
When they trust you with a secret.
When you mentioned you don’t remember the last time you had chocolate chip cookies in passing and they get you cookies the next day without you even asking them.
When he brings you your favorite drink and reminds you to take a break when you're too busy working.
When they get you exactly what you've always wanted but were too afraid to ask for your birthday.
When they know you hate birthday parties and celebrate by staying in and watching movies in your pjs.
When they text to ask if you got home safely.
When she remembered that specific detail you mentioned about yourself that one time and thought nobody would remember something so insignificant, but she did.
When he asks you for your opinion on something.
When they remind you to hydrate or to take your medication.
When you communicate what your love languages are and respect and validate each others' boundaries ♥️
Title: Different Love Languages I asked followers to send me prompts and I wrote the first things that came to mind in the form of short drabbles  🌻 ig: deesdoodleswastaken
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anilguptablog · 2 years
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panergy · 2 years
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6 Things I Do to Prepare for a Day Hike
In other words, don’t try to scramble in seconds to pack all your gear after reading a text that your friend has arrived to pick you up for the hike.
In addition to packing ahead of time, also take that time to make sure all of your gear is working properly.
For example, I carry a water filter on every single hike. This is something that I make sure is working properly.
I also make sure my med kit is stocked and none of the medications are expired. If they are, I will change them out for new ones.
If you’re using a GPS, make sure the batteries are charged and extras are packed.
While preparing my gear, I also make sure that there’s redundancy in my gear/safety.
For example, if I’m using a GPS, I will also pack a map and compass as a backup in case my GPS fails or gets lost.
Remember, “one is none and two is one”.
I take the time at home to organize and pack my gear so when I do hit the trail, I’m confident in what’s in my backpack.
Further Reading >> Learn all about trekking poles for hikers!
Day hiking in southern Utah. 2. Tell Someone Where I’m Going And When I’ll Be Back. This is a really simple thing to do.
It can be a note or a text, but I always make sure that a few people back home know exactly where I am going, what I’m doing, how long, who I’m going with, and when I’m expected to be back.
The more details, the better.
Hiking in the summer in Utah. 3. Make Sure I Have A High-Level Awareness Of The Landscape. When I’m at home, I like to look at a topo map and the satellite view of the area I’m going to be hiking.
I’m trying to get a general sense of the landscape as a whole.
Which way is the ridgeline running? What general direction are the streams or rivers flowing? Are there any prominent landmarks or features? Where are they relative to where I'll be hiking?
Getting this high-level birds-eye view of the landscape will help me better orient myself when I’m on the hike.
It’s also a good habit to take note of landmarks and points of interest as you are hiking.
Hiking with a friend in rainy conditions. 4. Check The Weather. This is a pretty obvious one, but it's important.
I make sure that I pack and prepare for the weather, but at the same time, I also try to be ready and able to adapt to changing weather conditions.
For example, the weather in the mountains is often unpredictable, so making sure that I have the appropriate hiking clothing and layers will help me be prepared and able to adapt if an unexpected storm rolls in.
This tropical trail mix is the perfect hiking snack! 5. Start Hydrating And Fueling My Body. I start drinking water and getting my body hydrated first thing in the morning.
I don't claim to be a nutrition expert, but I know for me personally, if I start a hike dehydrated and hungry, that's not going to be a fun day.
Making sure that I start a hike hydrated and with a solid breakfast will set me up for a successful hike.
My favorite breakfast, you ask?
Right now I’m loving a couple of scrambled eggs and a side of Kodiak Cakes power pancakes! That breakfast really fills me up and gives me energy all morning.
Of course, I also pack lots of delicious hiking snacks to eat along the hike.
Hiking with my day hiking gear in Utah. 6. Mentally Prepare For The Length, Duration, And Elevation Gain. I do research on the hike I’m planning to go on.
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misskatebishop · 2 years
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Through the lows and the highs
Word count: 800
Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x T1D!Reader
Warning: Some medical concepts and devices for blood sugar monitoring. Hyperglycemia.
Summary: Natasha gets home and finds out her girlfriend is not well. Nothing better than cuddling and waiting until her meds kick in.
A/N: This is more of a personal ficlet. Sort of venting. As usual, based on my experience living with Type 1 Diabetes.
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You couldn’t move to get yourself out of the bed. You were feeling exhausted, and the sickness hasn’t gone away since you woke. You weren’t sure what caused that, but you’re feeling like shit. You slept most of the morning, and you haven’t eaten anything because you could feel your stomach churning, threatening to vomit at the smell of food.
You knew one thing for sure: you were not pregnant.
You blink, groaning in bed to reach for your phone’s charge. Why were you feeling so bad? It was almost dinner time and you needed to eat, and… Oh God, you forgot Natasha was coming home tonight. Holy crap. You didn’t want your girlfriend to see you this way. You curse under your breath when you find out that your water bottle was empty. Again. How many times have you refilled it today? Two? Three? You weren’t sure. It was annoying, you must’ve peed at least three times in the last hour. What could you do? It’s summer, the weather is hot, it’s natural to feel more thirsty.
You stand up in an immense effort, your muscles feel like jelly. You walk into the kitchen, refilling your bottle and taking a long sip since your lips are dry. You feel the hint of a headache to add to your state. Ugh. You throw your helpless body on the couch, turning the TV on a random channel, you rub your blurry.
The effort of coming down the stairs makes you short of breath, unbelievable how out of shape you were. You’re sipping the water again when Natasha arrives. Your girlfriend smiles, coming to sit next to you.
“Hey, baby,” Natasha kisses you. “How was your day?” She asks, wrapping an arm around your shoulders and pulling you close.
“I feel like shit, Nat,” you admit.
Natasha shifts to stare at you.
“What’s wrong?” She asks, a frown of concern stamping on her features.
“I don’t know,” you shrug, clinging on her side. “Stay here, maybe it goes away soon.” Natasha nods.
“I’m not going anywhere.”
You pass the channel on TV until you find something nice for you and Natasha to listen to. Occasionally Natasha stands up and goes to the kitchen, asking if you are hungry, and even though your stomach rumbles you don’t think you’re capable of keeping anything in. So Natasha orders something on, you don’t argue about her choice. All you want is to lay down and sleep.
“Baby, I ordered–” Natasha stops all of sudden, looking down at the floor where your empty water bottle was. It was almost full when the red-haired got home, how was someone capable of drinking 500ml of water in minutes? “Baby, how high are you?”
“Uh?” You frown.
“Have you checked your blood sugar today?” Natasha asks, already getting a glucometer and fitting the test strip in it. “You said you were feeling sick. Did you eat something high in carbs or anything?”
“I didn’t eat today, I’m feeling sick since morning and–” You stop, remembering the whole day until– “Oh fuck, I forgot to take my background insulin! I–” You take the glucometer from Natasha’s hand, pricking your finger.
358 mg/dl.
Holy shit. You must’ve woken up with high blood sugar and the fact that you forgot your 24 hours insulin just added up to worsen your state. That’s why you were feeling sick, your levels of ketones must be higher than they should be.
You don’t even realize Natasha went upstairs to get your insulin case until she’s handing it to you and your phone. You sigh, calculating the dose for correction, then change the pen needle and sting it in your belly. You should’ve thought about hyperglycemia sooner. The signs were there: frequent urination, thirsty, sickness, and hunger. Damn, even the blurry vision.
You put the fast-acting insulin pen back in the case, and get the slow-acting you should’ve taken sooner. You roll the pen to your daily dose and sting it in your leg before you put it in the case with the other.
“Baby, did you deactivate the daily alarm in your phone?” Natasha asks.
“I didn’t. I just forgot to do it at the time,” you sigh, reaching for the empty bottle. “Can you refill, please? I have to pee.”
Natasha shakes her head, smirking, before getting the bottle to refill while you run to the bathroom. When you get back, your girlfriend is sitting on the couch, checking Netflix. You snuggle close to her, cuddling. Everything will be fine.
You will feel better when the insulin reaches its peak, then in two hours, you have to check your sugars again. Thankfully, you have a supportive, cuddler girlfriend. Everything will be fine.
It’s just another day going through the lows and the highs.
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wannabe-fic-writer · 3 years
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Moment In Time
Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x Reader
Summary: Just when you've gotten out, you’re given a reason to come back.
Warnings: Might be some mild language.
Chapter 2
* * * * * * *
“Oh no one is judging you ya big doofus.” You trail a finger along the shiny metal surface, looking at your tinted and distorted reflection.“ Just think it’s a little unnecessary.” Looking up at Tony, you smile.
His brown eyes roll, a hand grabbing onto the roof of the sports car to assist in pulling himself out.“ There’s nothing unnecessary about having options.”
A snort of a laugh falls from your lips as you walk to the next car.“ Yeah sure. If that’s what you want to call this.” 
“Half of these aren’t even mine.” He defends himself, hanging the keys up along with the other sets.
Pursing your lips you point to the car you’re in front of,“ who does this belong to then?” 
“Natasha.” He answers, taking far too much delight in the way your challengingly cocky attitude drops.
So you decided to hang out for a while, see a couple floors and let Tony explain some things to you as he liked to do, then head home. But you’d found a reason to stick around. Or, better put, Tony found reasons for you to stick around. 
You’d go to a floor, take in the sights, the tech, and listen to the man ramble on about the functionality of the floor. Around floor five you were ready to head out but Tony claimed you couldn’t see the medical floor and not go to the labs. And you couldn’t see the labs without seeing his workshop. 
This reasoning went on and on until you found yourself in the garage. The sun had set a few hours ago, lights automatically flicked on inside the tower and the seemingly day to day sounds of the tower went away. 
It’s quiet now, save for you and Tony talking and him occasionally starting up the cars.
You can’t lie and say you don’t enjoy hanging out with Tony. You’d always enjoyed your time with him, his actions and ideas unpredictable and so genius from the moment he learned to talk. But you also can’t lie and say you weren’t getting tired. A low, dull, rumbling started in your stomach not too long ago from the lack of food since this morning.
Making a bit of a show of looking at the last car, a sleep silver Audi that you know belongs to Tony, you check out the interior and make comments on the exterior. Then over exaggeratedly, you yawn and stretch your arms out. 
“Alright T. It’s gettin late. Think it’s about time I head home.” You tell him, walking over and gently dropping your hand onto his shoulder. 
He chuckles softly,“ Y/n, what kind of friend would I be if I let you go all the way back to Brooklyn while you’re tired and clearly hungry?” He pats your hand on his shoulder,“ you know Maria didn’t raise me that way.” 
It takes every ounce of willpower to not toss him somewhere so you could leave. But you know it’s been some time since you and Tony actually hung out and while he definitely has some ulterior motive to this, his persistence gave it away, you oblige him. Your reasoning is that you know the food will be good. 
What you aren’t expecting, however, is to find the entirety of the Avengers sitting around the living room on the main floor. Unlike the other floors that were quiet, a low chatter fills the space and a clanking of cutlery to ceramic plates. 
With Tony’s arm around your shoulders, you’re guided to the tables lined with food that looks delicious. Tony obviously has some private chefs around here. 
“Um, am I crashing some type of party or bonding time?” You ask him as he starts to pile food onto his plate.
“No,” he smacks his lips and waves you off,“ not really. We just eat together. Cap says it strengthens the team and all and I pay for the food so everyone comes. I’m sure they’ll be glad to have you.” With an almost devilish smile, he puts a bread roll on his plate and turns away. 
Your narrowed eyes follow his retreating form. Sighing and shaking your head, you grab a plate, put a little of everything on it, then head over to the unoccupied bar. 
Before you sit down to eat, you grab one of Tony’s expensive bottles of liquor off the top shelf. Pouring yourself a glass, you walk around the bar, catching the eyes of a couple members of the team before you sit down. 
As you eat and drink, the laughter and banter of the team behind you erasing the silence of the room, you can’t help but remember the numerous times you’d had the privilege of being around your friends like that.
* * * * Flashback * * * * 
With a friendly smile you push your chair out and stand up, walking over to the kitchen doorway. Reaching forward you grab the glass dish from the woman’s hands.
“Careful it’s-”
You nod and smile,“ I know. I’m fine.” 
Marie’s eyes squint at you and she nods in understanding as she remembers. Patting your arm she turns back to the kitchen right before Jarvis comes out and follows you to the table. 
Whispering a quiet ‘excuse me’ to Ana, you reach around her to place the dish on the table, then refind your seat across from her. The second your butt touches the seat two sets of eyes are on you. 
“Y/n please tell this buffoon how ludicrous his invention sounds.” The angelically accented voice of your close friends says. You swear you can feel her gaze burning into your temple. 
You look over at her, opening your mouth to speak when Howard cuts in. 
“No Y/nn, tell Margaret that this is genius. It’s revolutionary!” He exclaims and your eyes widen a little. 
Face morphing into an expression of offense, Peggy turns to look at Howard and they start bickering again. 
Smiling amusedly, you lean back into the chair, making eye contact with Jarvis’ wife An from across the table.
Both of you shake your heads, An chuckling softly just before Jarvis comes to sit beside her. 
“Howard,” the man looks up at the stern but sweet tone of his wife.“ That’s enough honey.” She gives a smile that matches the sweetness of her tone. 
The Brit beside you snickers and you lightly smack the side of her leg with the bag of your hand, muttering a quiet,“ relax.” Which results in her huffing and crossing her arms, sending a glare at Howard that she fixes just as Marie sits down across from her. 
Despite having been bickering since long before now, the Agent and Philanthropist waste no time in playing nice over dinner. Alongside them, Marie, An, Jarvis, and yourself have one of many very entertaining dinners. Laughs exchanged between all of you. 
* * * * Flashback End * * * * 
You’re yanked from the memory when a heavy weight lands on your shoulder. 
Tensing up, you prepare yourself to fight whoever it is but you quickly remember that you’re in the Avengers tower with earth’s mightiest heroes. The chances of this being an attack are slim.
Still slightly tense, you look over your shoulder at the owner of the hand on your body. To find America’s golden boy looking down at you. 
“Everything alright?” He asks, seemingly concerned. . 
You give him a small smile and chuckle softly,“ all good Captain.” You give a playfully mocking salute and he sighs instantly afterwards.
Walking around the bar, he leans on top of it with his fingers laced in front of him.“ Listen I- I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have reacted the way I did on the jet earlier.”
“That’s one way to put it.” You take a bite of your food, staying silent until you swallow, then sipping your drink.“ We’re good. I know my unexpected bombing was, well, unexpected.” He chuckles lightly at your words and shakes his head. 
When he reaches up  to almost nervously rub the back of his neck, you know he isn’t completely sure that everything is good.
“Have a drink with me Cap.” You tell him, nodding to the shelf of alcohol behind him. 
Looking from you to the drinks, he nods.“ You can call me Steve.” He tells you, putting some ice in his glass then pouring his drink. 
“Well Steve,” you raise your glass to him and he gently taps his against yours.“ Feel free to call me Y/n.” You tell him, sipping your drink.
He smiles softly at you, your invitation seemingly having done the job of calming his nerves slightly. Light conversation flows between the two of you, a back and forth of questions that answers don’t hold much consequence but still shed some light on the types of people yourself and Steve are. 
By the time the sun has disappeared beyond the horizon and the sky is littered with stars and the lights of every skyscraper you and Steve are well through one of Tony’s more expensive bottles of liquor. Loud laughs sound from the two of you as you joke with one another. 
While the alcohol doesn’t affect either of your systems as it would someone else, the other occupants of the living space would assume you were drunk.
It intrigued more than a few of them how loose and easy going Steve is. It wasn’t as if he never had fun with them or drank, but there seemed to be something about you that brought an even lighter aura to the older man.
“It was incredible. I’m telling you,” you shake your head with a small smile of excitement.“ I wasn’t inclined to be excited about it since I was there to see the Yankees kick ass, but the Dodgers played exceptionally well.”
Steve has a small smirk on his face, nodding approvingly as he sips his drink.“ Well I can’t say I’m surprised.” 
Once again you laugh, finishing your drink and leaning off of the bar top.“ Ever proud, Mister America.” You say teasingly, bringing yet another laugh from the tall blonde. 
He finishes off his drink and you take a deep breath and release it.“ Welp Cap,” pushing up out of your chair, you smile at him,“ it was a pleasure chatting with you. Ever want to talk about the good ole days-”
“I’ll give you a ring.” He holds his hand out to you and you shake it firmly.
As you take up the glasses and your plate you nod a goodbye to Steve and go your separate ways, you to the kitchen and Steve to the elevators. 
Setting the dishes in the sink, you turn the water on and lean against the counter as you wait for it to get hot. Just before your mind can begin to wander you catch sight of movement in your peripherals. 
A smirk almost instantly pulls onto your face at the sight of the red head walking in. Her green eyes are already trained on you with a look in them that you can’t describe. 
“Agent Romanoff,” you nod to her, smirk still in place. 
She takes small purposeful steps closer, stopping a few feet away from you,“ you lied to us. Member of SHIELD for a while?” She raises her eyebrows and shakes her head with an overly sweet smirk,“ you founded SHIELD.”
You hiss in a breath of air through your teeth, turning to face away from her as you chuckle.“ I didn’t lie, actually. Withholding all of the truth is a different thing.” Drying the plates off, you set them on the rack to dry, the forks and cups following afterwards.“ And let’s make something very clear, I am not a founder of SHIELD.” You dry your hands and turn to her.
“Really? Cause SHIELD records say otherwise” She reasons, stepping closer. 
Eyebrows raising at her further approach, you do the same. You smile softly at her and close the distance between you two, leaving just under a foot of space.“ I understand you aren’t happy with the redacted details of my history Agent Romanoff so let me clear it up for you.”
Natasha tilts her head at your words and listens intently as you continue.“ I didn’t found SHIELD. I was the first ever agent. Agent Carter and Howard Stark saved me and administered me an enhanced version of the same serum Steve took. I owed them my life and I made sure to protect them,” you falter at that, jaw clenching as a horrible memory flashes through your mind.
“That’s how you met Tony?” She asks. It wasn’t missed by Natasha. The ex-assassin could read anyone. The second she noticed the distant look in your eyes she knew something was wrong and while she was curious, something told her not to ask about that. 
You shake your head to clear your thoughts and look at her.“ Was in the hospital the night he was born. Watched him grow up.” You smile fondly,“ he’s family.”
For a moment it’s quiet. Still you watch Natasha, unsure if she’s finished or not. Just when you think she’s done, you nod and head towards the door, only to stop when she speaks. 
“Why did you come for us?”
Turning from the door, you look over your shoulder at her,“ I owed Nick a favor.”
Her eyes narrow at you and you give a small nod before leaving out. 
Neither you or Natasha would’ve guessed that would be your last conversation for the span of the next week. While you were at the tower a few times, to drop off something you’d talked about with Steve or pick up Tony before the two of you went and hung out somewhere, you hadn’t gone inside. 
She wouldn’t admit it to you but Natasha had started to wonder when you’d come back. Not only does your reputation precede itself, something about your personality intrigues her more than she’d ever been before. She wanted to see you again, talk to you again. 
Green eyes look through the clear blue glass, brows slightly pinched together at the sight of you and Tony hugging. Natasha debated with herself whether or not she was going to go speak to you as Steve jogged out of the front doors and over to you, sharing a handshake and a hug. 
The last thing the ex-assassin expects to feel is the little flutter in her stomach when you smile brightly. 
She tears her gaze away from you, frown deeper than before. Her thoughts running a mile a minute. 
When a weight drops onto her shoulder she almost flinches. Grabbing the hand on her, she twists it and forces the person to stand in front of her, slamming them into the window. 
“Well damn.” You curse, using your hand on the window to push yourself off the window. A chuckle falls from your lips as Natasha let’s you go.“ Guess it wasn’t a good idea to approach a trained agent without speaking.” You say jokingly, green eyes snapping down to the smile on your lips and back up.
There’s an incredibly short pause from Natasha before she channels her usually straight expression.“ What’d you want Y/Ln?”
“How bout a smile Romanoff.” When a beat passes without her expression changing you sigh.“ I want a cup of coffee. And I want you to come get one with me.”
“Come again?” Her expression cracks slightly as her eyebrows raise slightly. 
You tilt your head and smile softly at her.“ You were practically shooting lasers at me through the window. Figured either you wanted to get out of the tower or you were jealous Tony and Steve were taking up all my time.” A teasing tone wraps around all your words and Natasha instantly scoffs. 
“I have no reason to be jealous of Stark or Rogers.” She says and you nod.
“I figured as much. Which means you want to get out of the tower.” You nod for her to follow you.“ Cup of coffee does everyone some good.” 
Natasha watches the confident stride you make towards the door, not once looking back as you just know she’s going to follow. And she does, despite her pride telling her not to.
The coffee shop isn’t too far away from the tower so you walk. Unlike your walks with Steve, it’s silent. The redhead stays two steps behind you, not saying a word as she follows. 
A burst of cool air rushes past the two of you with your first step into the coffee shop to the sound of the bell jingling above you. Smiling softly at the familiar building you walk further in.
Natasha takes into account that there are no more than ten customers inside. For a New York coffee shop it was incredibly quiet and quaint. 
“Love it here,” she hears you mumble as you step up to the counter.“ Hi, can I get one medium black coffee and a large iced coffee with two creams and two sugars.” The woman rings you up and you pay. Pocketing your wallet as you turn to face Natasha. 
You smile at her lack of emotion. There is no reason for you to be as grumpy and blank as she is.“ I’ve been to a lot of places but here, they have the best coffee.” You tell her. 
Her head tilts slightly and you purse your lips and nod. Once again it’s silent as you wait, then you grab the coffees when your name is called, turning to hand the black coffee to Natasha. 
With things going the way they are, you have an internal battle on staying here or just going back to the tower. Taking one last chance, you nod to an empty table and sit down. Natasha coming over and sitting as well.
“Look, Natasha, you can’t hate me so much that we can’t even have a coffee together.” Your tone of voice is one of confusion and slight sadness. 
Frowning once again at the emotions in your voice, Natasha watches you. Green, calculating eyes and a blank expression are the only signs of how hard she’s thinking right now. 
With a huff of a sigh she says,“ I don’t hate you.” She admits, face finally giving way to emotion.“ I- I barely know you.”
“Well maybe we should change that.” Holding up your cup of coffee you take a sip and tell her,“ I think if you give me a chance, I might not be as bad as you think.”
Her eyes narrow and for the first time ever, you see her crack the smallest of smiles.“ We’ll see about that.”
* * * * * * *
Taglist: @owloftheshadows @natasha-danvers @blackxwidowsxwife @yumusak-yastik
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wing-ed-thing · 3 years
Text
Mob Wife (Kakuzu x Reader, ft. Hidan) Part IV
Synopsis: The Akatsuki are in emergency mode. Kakuzu leads Hidan to the only place he knows for sure is safe to regroup.
Word Count: 
Warnings/Tags: Violence, Blackmail, Language, Fem!Reader, HouseWife!Reader, Moll!Reader, Attempt at Humor, Ceremonial Drinking of Sake, Traditional Wedding
Part I Part II Part III Part IV Finale
Notes: It’s back. Writing Hidan has got me feeling a certain way rn
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It rained on your wedding day: weather fitting for, and not minded by, a criminal and a deserter. As you approached the temple, he tried to tell you many times that you were going to be turned away, but as you spoke to the shrine masters, you were greeted warmly and welcomed. You were young with a warm face that offset Kakuzu’s intimidating exterior. Everyone always loved you right away, a way about you that Kakuzu could never begin to consider replicating. With your open heart, you brought a foreign concept into his world: acceptance. The few priests and priestesses at the temple on the border of the Land of Stone looked upon you kindly, a kindness that you and Kakuzu continued to repay years later. The small village of a few hundred that housed that shrine would never see a shinobi attack. Now, only you continue to repay years later.
You could tell that Kakuzu didn’t like being in the temple in the slightest. He had never been one for religion or structure or ceremonies, so you tried not to laugh the first time you saw him in his montsuki haori hakama. You wondered how much grumbling went into getting Kakuzu in such formal attire with a goofy, lopsided grin. Even as he gazed upon your amused, upturned lips, his infamous temper laid unusually dormant. Kakuzu never thought that he would see his own wedding day. Being the kind of man he was, he never thought that he’d have one. He didn’t think that he deserved it, but for once as you stood in front of him in your shiromuku, all of his jaded thoughts seemed to fade. Of course with you, all doors opened.
Kakuzu knelt next to you at the shrine, ever stoic. He put his hair up before the ceremony and secured it neatly behind his head. You remembered it when it was short. As the priest announced your marriage to the gods, you couldn’t help but glance at Kakuzu out of the corner of your eye. He held himself together better than you imagined he would.
“Well, yes. I am an adult,” he would tell you later.
But at that moment, he received the first sakazuki. The priest's vessel tipped over the small cup two times before pouring. Kakuzu brought the dish up to his lips and took three sips: pointless seeing that neither of you had parents, but traditional nonetheless. You were taught to always honor your ancestors, but you doubted that Kakuzu felt the same. You received your cup and the same sake, taking the same three sips and the ceremony went on. The second sakazuki represented your vow to care for each other. You received a slightly larger cup and once again, you each touched the sake to your lips three times. The third represented fortune and fertility.
The Heavens, the Earth, and the People.
You offered Kakuzu a light smile as you moved to the next part of the ceremony, a gesture to assure him that it was almost over. He would have rolled his eyes in any other setting, but Kakuzu didn’t even have to speak for you to know exactly what he meant. You knew that more than anything, he was happy to be with you. Out of all the things that he had done as a shinobi, he could handle a stuffy ceremony.
“I thought you liked stuffy things,” you teased him later, parts of your robes slung over forearms and shoulders for better mobility as you walked through the gardens. Your hand rested in his as you balanced yourself on some raised, rock ledges. His expression could have easily been mistaken for exasperation as he scoffed, but you knew better. He looked happy. “You’re a shinobi. Now that’s stuffy!”
The priest had you stand and you received a flowering branch to offer to the gods. As you held the sprig in your hand, you glanced at Kakuzu. His eyes met your own and you quietly prayed over your offerings before presenting them together, stem first. You bowed together, the rituals vaguely familiar to you as you performed them.
With the blessings of the gods, you had received your rings. Your thumb ran over the skin of Kakuzu’s hand. They had a familiar gruffness to them and held smooth bumps from old scars. His fingernails were short. You slid the band onto his ring finger. The black suited him. He squeezed the fingers of your other hand. The space behind your eyes stung as you held back tears watching as he placed the ring on your hand.
Neither of you had family, so you thanked the shrine priests and priestesses and enjoyed their hospitality. You took a single picture. It was the same frame that you held in your hands now.
Kakuzu walked out a few hours ago, taking Hidan with him. Your kitchen was, for the most part, wrecked. Your doing. Your tears had since dried up and your trembling was beginning to fade. With a shaky breath, you brought yourself to your feet. You placed the picture face-down on the counter and reached for the broom in the corner. Your heart hurt, but the world continued on. And if the world continued on, so should you.
***
You didn’t want to eat, you didn’t feel hungry, but you stood over the sink anyway biting into whatever you could pull from your fridge. You cleaned up the kitchen to the best of your ability. Trash piled up in neat bins outside: splintered wood, broken plates, and any other particles of dust that you managed to sweep up. You could handle it later. At least the rest of the kitchen was spotless. You glanced down at the thick wedding band that sat in your hand. Twirling it between your fingers, you bit into your bell pepper like an apple. That was the kind of night you were having.
A harsh pounding came from the front door and for a split second you wondered if your husband came back. Ex-husband. You didn’t think so. You kept your eyes on the kitchen window but the pounding continued adamantly. A slight shiver went down the back of your neck. The next farm wasn’t for miles. That was definitely not Kakuzu.
You put down your pepper and rolled out your utensil drawer. Your fingers danced across the kunai strapped to the bottom as you silently hoped that your training hadn’t worn off too horribly. The banging ceased as the doorknob began to rattle. The door swung open and you launched your kunai with immense velocity and precision. It was snatched out of the air.
“Fuck! That hurts like a bitch!”
Hidan stood in the entryway with his hand still held up and wrapped around your weapon. Blood dripped onto your floors as the kunai clattered to the ground. He shook out his palm, now sporting a deep gash. All you could do was stand and blink, wondering why he was there and if Kakuzu was with him. Hidan threw his cloak onto the rack. It slid, hardly staying on as he marched over to you. The door didn’t fit into its frame the same as it did before and there was no sign of Kakuzu.
“Can you patch me up, lady?” He looked around your kitchen for somewhere to sit, but found none. He dripped more onto your floors. You quickly guided his wrist over your sink and looked up at him. Beads of water fell down his face. You didn’t even hear the rain outside.
“What happened?” you asked sternly, your voice cracking a bit with worry. Hidan groaned.
“You fucked up my hand, can you at least fix me? I’m traumatized over here.” You sighed, yanking him forward before turning the running water on over his hand. You held it there for a second as if telling him to keep it there before running off to get your medical kit.
“Hidan, you have to tell me if there is an emergency,” you said as you heaved the box onto the counter from your spare room. You cleaned his palm with soap and disinfectant before applying pressure. While you didn’t have to worry about blood loss with Hidan, you also didn’t want him passing out on your kitchen floor either. That would make one more thing to clean up. “Hidan—” You pulled the gauze extra tight. He didn’t seem to be listening to you. —“Is there an emergency?”
“No, lady, it was just cold as fuck and Kakuzu’s got a stick up his ass that’s worse than usual. But you already know what that’s like.” The atmosphere stood still at the mention of Kakuzu’s name.
You knew that you shouldn’t worry about him. As far as you were concerned, he had just divorced you a few hours ago, and even if he hadn’t, you were certain that he could take care of himself. You apparently didn’t do a great job at masking your worry.
He usually didn’t care about the effect of his words, but as you frowned to yourself, Hidan couldn’t help but consider how sad you looked. He pursed his lips, never one for comforting others. For a split second, he wondered whether or not he should have brought up his partner at all. Two fingers gently bumped the bottom of your chin and you looked up at Hidan.
“Don’t look so down. It doesn’t look good on you.” He hesitated. “He’ll come back.”
You dropped his wrapped hand, not noticing that you’ve been drawing loops around his knuckles with your finger.
“I don’t know. He’s usually pretty certain about things and I can’t dwell on that.” You shook your head, turning the water back on to wash your own hands. “You have to go. I know that you have things to do and my— and Kakuzu won’t like that you’re here.” He pouted as you moved around him. You had blood to clean up.
“But it’s raining…” he pouted, expression falling in your peripheral. “And he’s miserable right now which means I’m miserable. C’mon let me stay, I’m miserable.”
“Hidan.” You turned to him and leaned on the doorway from your kitchen to your small living area. “Your partner doesn’t live here anymore.” You flicked on the entryway light, your bucket in hand. Hidan followed behind you, now taking your spot in the doorframe.
“But that doesn’t mean that I have to leave. You know he’s being stupid, but that doesn’t mean that I need to suffer out in the rain because Kakuzu’s a crotchety, old bastard.” You sighed, resting on the handle of your mop. You shook your head.
“I’m sure by the time you get to town the two of you can find somewhere to stay.”
A silence overtook the house again, full of raging, but unspoken thoughts. You squeezed out the yarns and tended to the floors. It, at the very least, gave you something to do. Hidan’s blood already dried part way and you scrubbed harder, but not before it was snatched out of your grip. Hidan shoved you over to take your place. The backs of your knees hit the armrest of the modest couch that you almost toppled down onto. He took to scrubbing.
“So what happened?” he asked.
“Sorry?” Hidan peered at you with his bright violet irises.
“I’m trying to be nice and ask you about your problems, so you better start chatting before I lose interest.” The mop splashed back into the bucket. “Who else do you get to talk to?” You pursed your lips. You knew that he was biding his time to wait out the rain, but his words weren’t wrong. The hurt still felt fresh and perhaps you were feeling a bit desperate to get it out of your system.
“I’m not sure what happened. I asked, but, well, you know how my… how Kakuzu is.” And you found yourself retelling the entirety of what happened: the argument, the ring, Kakuzu’s misplaced comments about children. You left out the part about the wrecked kitchen. “And then he said something about ‘now letting this happen’ which had to be the last straw for me.”
“Did you want brats?” Hidan had since stopped his cleaning. Surprisingly, he listened intently to your rambling as he propped himself against the wall. You swung your feet back and forth over the side of the couch.
“I never really thought about it before and Kakuzu and I never talked about it, so I don’t know why he brought it up.”
“Because he’s a dumbass who thinks too much. I never know what’s going on in that fucked up head of his. If I had a home to come to like this with a cute little thing in an apron—” Hidan scoffed. —“Fuck the Akatsuki. I wouldn’t be hiding you out here because of some band of losers in capes.” That made you laugh.
“You’re in the Akatsuki,” you giggled and Hidan raised a slender eyebrow.
“So? I’m the best one out of all those guys.”
“The best out of some band of losers?” The corners of Hidan’s lips turned upwards into a brief smile as he rolled his pretty irises.
“Listen, I got my devilish charms going for me which is better than Ragdoll. He looks like a fucking pin cushion.” Your hand came over your mouth as you laughed. Hidan looked down at where you sat, pride swelling in his chest at the prospect of cheering you up. But your face quickly morphed into something sentimental.
“Aw, but he’s a cute pin cushion…” Your bottom lip curled into a pout, but at least you didn’t look quite as sad as before. Hidan leaned a bit forward.
“He’s a little over a hundred-eight centimeters tall and has a big-ass nose.” You let out an amused breath. “I’d hardly consider that ‘cute’.”
“But it’s a cute nose. It’s slender and has that cute little bump in the middle.” Your voice grew quieter. Another silence, the third of Hidan’s visit.
It all felt too confusing for you. Maybe Kakuzu was never that interested in you in the first place. You shook your head then and there, much to Hidan’s confusion. Despite Kakuzu’s attitude towards most everything, you knew that he cared deeply about you. Perhaps he had grown bored. Despite ninja work not being of interest to you, you knew that many found the profession very exciting. You ran many profitable operations in the surrounding area, but more money could be made elsewhere, you knew that much. Your lifespan was nothing compared to Kakuzu’s nearly a century of living. He had done everything in life that he had wanted to do and all you had little to show for your existence.
You kept replaying his words about the time that you had. That you had enough time to do more. But if you really thought about it, you were content living the way you had been. You were happy and for a split second you considered whether or not Kakuzu actually saw himself as worthy of you. You shook your head for the second time. No, if anything, you considered it the other way around. You’d imagine that you would come off as boring and childlike to an immortal.
“That’s a lot of thinking.” Hidan had taken to wandering around the room. You hadn’t noticed. “Fuck thinking. You deserve better than taking care of some place in the middle of nowhere and running numbers on boring-ass shit.” You smiled again to yourself, something else that you didn’t notice.
“I actually like it here,” you mumbled. Hidan yawned.
“Can I stay now?” You deliberated to yourself before grabbing the bucket and the mop away from him. He didn’t do a great job, but you found yourself relatively uncaring at the moment.
“Yes, you can stay,” you sighed. Hidan was already halfway down the hall by the time you finished your sentence.
“Good because I was going to crash here anyway.”
@brokennerdalert @unsatisfiedanddisappointed @krispypotato @meme-queen-1999​
Notes: Reader and Kakuzu had a Shinto wedding if anyone’s interested. 
Thank you to all who liked, reblogged, followed and otherwise supported. Your support means so much and is greatly appreciated.
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slasherpegger · 3 years
Text
Going To The Mall With The Sawyers
Characters: Bubba, Chop Top, Nubbins, and Drayton
Word count: 0.6k
A/N: I’m open for requests!
Bubba Sawyer
Obviously you can’t bring Bubba with his skin mask, so you two have to think up ways he could cover his face. There are numerous ways to go out; sunglasses and a medical mask, halloween masks, even maybe a masquerade mask. You settle on a ski mask.
Bubba isn’t used to social interaction as he’s a homebody. He’s definitely anxious, fidgeting with his bracelet and whimpering nervously. Make sure to hold his hand to calm him down and keep him close.
Clothing stores are a must. Bubba loves to dress up and it doesn’t matter what gender the clothes are-- he’s going all out. Tuxedos? Definitely. Dresses? Yes please. He isn’t just dressing himself up, you’re a part of this too. It’s impossible to leave the store without bags and bags of clothes.
Chop Top Sawyer
Wears his Sonny wig and encourages you to dress up with him.
The moment he sees a FYE he’s running over to it, dragging you behind with him. He’ll go absolutely feral in the vinyl records section, throwing the ones he doesn’t like on the ground and hoarding his favorites.
He brought his shoulder bag just to steal an unhealthy amount of vinyls. Mall security is called after five minutes of him trying to play tetris in his bag with how much he stole.
The two of you are running out of the store the moment security arrives and Chop is still pocketing random items as he runs out.
The two of you are hiding in the back of his truck trying to catch your breath when he pulls out a palm sized pink bunny plushie. 
“F-for my Cher… ehehe.. I-it’s as c--cute as you.”
Nubbins Sawyer
Undoubtedly you need to hold this man’s hand or else he runs away by himself. You remember stories of Drayton putting the twins on child leashes and you can never blame him.
If there’s a fountain, Nubbins is drinking out of it and stealing the coins. Who’d leave all of this free money at the bottom of this tasty water?
You’ve learned the hard way not to take him clothes shopping. The moment he gets bored he’ll wander off into the dressing rooms, set off a fire, and scream you need to get out. 
Nubbins has no awareness of personal boundaries. He takes pictures of everybody and everything he thinks is cool. It took a bit of convincing, but he takes pictures of the two of you together. 
All of this chaos made you hungry so the two of you decided to get a soft pretzel. As you reach into your bag to pay, Nubbins takes a photo of the employee and hands it to him with a shit eating grin. 
The two of you are escorted out of the mall after a fight with a soft pretzel stand employee, photographs, and coins being thrown.
Drayton Sawyer
First, you need to convince this grumpy old man to even leave the house. By some miracle you do, here’s how it’d go.
He’s the most “normal” out of the Sawyers so he doesn’t need any supervision, no disguises, no hand holding, no child leashes.
He complains the entire time you’re out about how much of a waste of time and money this is, particularly if you go clothes shopping.
If the mall you go to has rest areas with couches, he’ll fall asleep once sitting there. If you let him, he’d be out for hours.
Getting food is a difficult task with Drayton, he’ll pull a “we have food at home” the moment you offer anything. If you manage to get something to eat, he’ll complain about how it’s not quality and as good as home cooking.
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allyouneedisbuck · 3 years
Text
keep you warm and safe
summary // bonus part to my arms will hold you; bucky and his wife as she goes through the twelve hours of labor. stories, pain, games, jello and lots of love. [established bucky barnes x fem! reader]
words // 3.2k
warnings // depiction of labor, epidural usage, hospital birth & excessive use of nickname pretty girl
notes // eeeeeeeeeek i was so excited for this request! i love bucky + the mrs + this dynamic so much. note this is written in a similar style as the first piece; snippets of each hour.
》* 。 • ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ • 。* 。° 。* 。 • ˚《
Hour One 
Bucky doesn’t know what to do to help you, that much is obvious to you. It might even make you laugh, if it hadn’t been for the pain that was coming and going. Dr. O had apologetically explained that you were only six centimeters dilated and would have to wait until you were at ten, which you knew, but it still sucked to hear.
You groan, a mixture of pain and annoyance, as Bucky looks at your doctor sadly. “How long will that take?” He asks curiously. 
She shrugs before pulling up your chart on the tablet at the end of your bed. “It really depends. It could be anywhere from an hour to more than twelve. Every woman goes through the stages of labor differently.” 
Bucky’s hand is still rubbing your stomach gently as he continues to ask questions. “But her water broke. Her contractions are only a few minutes apart. How can it take another, like, ten hours?” 
Your hand grips him tightly. “Buck, it doesn’t matter.” You say in a tired voice. 
He turns to you a little apologetically. “Sorry, I’m just curious.” He admits sheepishly. Dr. O takes her leave with a kind smile and a gentle pat on your shin. Bucky looks down at you again. “Dads didn’t really go in the room with their wives when I was younger. My dad and I sat out in the waiting room when Becca was born.” 
You look at him with curious eyes. “Really? Your mom was all alone?” 
“I think my grandma was with her for a while, but yeah, pretty much.” He shrugs. “We were let in after Rebecca was cleaned and wrapped up. It’s nice being able to be with you. I just want to help.” 
Your heart swells at his admission. “That’s so sweet, Bucky.” You whisper resting your head against his shoulder. “Tell me about that day.” You demand quietly, hoping a story would help distract you. 
“I don’t really remember much of it.” Bucky starts. “But I remember my dad and I sitting in the waiting room and you know, we lived in such a gloomy time. Before the depression we weren’t too well off, so I know my parents were a little stressed about having two of us hooligans.” He laughs gently and you smile. You feel yourself relax at his voice and although there’s still pain, you’re not struggling to breathe anymore. “But when my dad saw Becca and the nurse let him hold her I saw it all go away. My mom let me crawl into the bed with her. Nothing like this one, mind you. It was smaller and way less comfortable, but she still wrapped her arm around me and kissed my head and my dad introduced me to Becca.” He hastily wipes a tear away. “It’s one of the few good memories I have of back then.”
“I’m so sorry, Bucky.” You say, a little guilty. You hadn’t meant to make him sad by bringing up his family. “I wish they could meet me and our babies.” 
Bucky smiles down at you then presses a kiss to your cheek. “Me too, but I know they’re proud of me. I know they would’ve loved you. That’s all I need.” 
You groan as another contraction hits and Bucky sits up a little straighter, his hand immediately rubbing up and down your back. “You’re so strong. I love you so much.” He murmurs as you breathe deeply. 
“I’m so proud of you.” You say a moment later when the sharp pain has passed and you have a second to breathe. 
Bucky snorts and looks you over with his eyes. “Not prouder than I am of you. Nothing I’ve done in this lifetime can compare to what you’re doing right now.” 
And - well - a small part of you wants to argue that Bucky saved lives daily, but the rest of you agreed. Bucky would never do this and his support and pure adoration made it a little easier. 
Hour Three
“I’m hungry.” You complain. Dr. O had left a little over twenty minutes ago after declaring you were still only dilated six centimeters, which felt impossible but who were you to argue with her? “What can I eat?” 
Bucky’s begun pulling out some of the stuff you had packed in the go bag and organizing it in the small hospital dresser. 
“The nurse said I can get you ice chips or jello, but that’s really it.” He answers apologetically. You sigh mournfully. All you really wanted was something to fill you up. “Want me to grab some?” 
“Jello, please.” You shrug. “Are you sure I can’t eat anything? I want, like, mashed potatoes.” You tap your fingers against your stomach as you adjust your pillow behind you with one arm. 
Bucky laughs as he comes over to you. “I’m sure, pretty girl.” His hand cups your cheek gently and you look up at him with a pout. “I’ll bring you some jello.” 
“Thank you.” You smile up at him. Dr. O enters as he leaves and he pauses. “Go! I’ll be fine.” You wave him away as she comes to your bedside. He waits for a moment before finally stepping out of the room. You look at Dr. O with a tired smile. “Checking me again?” You ask.” 
“I will in a little while. I came to talk to you about an epidural. You’ve already been in labor for a few hours and it looks like you’ll be one of the women who is in labor for a tough amount of time.” She explains gently. “It’s completely up to you. You have some time to think.” 
You nod. Your contractions still hurt and they took the wind out of you when they came every few minutes, so it didn’t feel like the worst idea. “Come back in half an hour? Can I have some time to think?” 
“Of course!” She nods. “Take your time. Remember nobody is here to judge you, it’s your body and your choice entirely.” 
You smile. “Thank you.” You relax against your pillow as you wait for Bucky to return with your jello. You think of Dr. O’s advice torn between having a natural birth and the gruelling pain it could leave you in for hours. 
“I come bearing jello.” Bucky pushes the door open softly and smiles at you with two cups of jello in his hand. You frown at their small size and Bucky chuckles. “I know they’re small, that's why I brought you two.” 
You smile gratefully when he peels one open and hands it to you along with a small spoon. You moan at the taste of it and the feeling of being able to eat something even though it’s something small like jello. 
“Dr. O asked if I wanted an epidural.” You murmur in between bites. Bucky nods. “What will that do?” He asks curiously. 
You take a deep breath as pain shoots through you. “Help with these contractions in case labor goes on for hours. I don’t know some women just go entirely natural, I’m torn.” 
“Well is it unsafe?” He asks before handing you the second cup. You shake your head. “There are risks to every medical procedure. It’s not like, bad for the babies but it can have some risky side effects.” You explain. 
Bucky looks at you with intent, like he doesn’t want to miss a word that comes out of your mouth. “You know it’s up to you. Nobody else's opinion should matter, it’s not their body.” 
You take a deep breath. “I know… I just don’t want people to think I’m like, not woman enough or-“
“Stop.” Bucky cuts you off harshly. You look at him with wide eyes. “Pretty girl, nobody can tell you anything about your choices. Got that?” He tilts his head so you’re forced to look him in the eyes. 
You’ve always loved Bucky’s eyes. His emotions reflected in the blue that held your own stare until you nod slowly. 
He smiles then flexes his vibranium arm. “And if they do, they can deal with me.” 
Hour Five 
“Call them back!” You laugh as you sit up in bed. The pain has lessened considerably after the epidural at hour four, when you had only been dilated around seven centimeters. “I’m fine, Buck!” 
Bucky looks hesitant as he pulls the phone out. “Are you sure, pretty girl? If you’re tired you can take a nap or-“
“Bucky.” You whine a little. “I want to talk to my friend! Call Sam back!” He sighs as he pulls out his phone and sets it up on your little tray for food. 
It rings for a few moments before Sam’s face appears on the screen with a wide smile. “My favorite people!” He cheers when he sees you two both in frame. “Man, has anybody told you how beautiful you look right now?” He says sweetly. 
You roll your eyes. “Only every hour. Bucky won’t stop saying it.” You nudge his side playfully. “I look like a disaster, but I appreciate it.” 
Sam and Bucky both shake their heads. “Not true at all. You look like a goddess.” Bucky says sternly. You giggle as Sam snorts. 
“How far along are you?” He asks. You shrug. “About three more centimeters to go, but the doctor said it could take awhile.” 
“Should Steve and I come camp out in the waiting room?” He smirks. “I’m about to buy out the whole gift store.” 
You laugh. “Not necessary! Bucky will text you when we get closer if you want to come down.” 
Sam rolls his eyes good naturedly. “Of course we do. Life gets so boring here at the compound. Steve!” He yells out. You and Bucky flinch at the drastic change in tone. “Steve! Come here!” He looks back at the camera. “He came to help with training today, that worked out great, didn’t it? We can carpool.” 
You both nod as Steve forces his face into the camera view. You and Bucky smile brightly at him and wave. “Hey! You guys look great! I can’t believe you’re gonna have two babies soon.” 
“I can!” You shake your head. “Almost nine months of these babies inside of me, I can’t wait to have them in my arms. I want to drink coffee again and have wine!” 
The three men laugh and Bucky presses a kiss to your forehead. There’s a knock at your door and you two look up to see one of the nurses quietly coming in. “We’ve gotta go! Bucky will text you when you can come down.” You wave goodbye before Bucky grabs his phone and sits up. 
“Hi!” She smiles brightly. “I wanted to come in and say hi, there’s a shift change right now so you'll be seeing me for the next twelve hours.” 
You frown. “Is Dr. O still here?” 
She nods. “Dr. O is on call for you! We’ll be doing regular checks and then we’ll call her back when we believe it’s time to start.” You nod gratefully as she moves towards your bed. 
Hour Seven 
“D1?” You look behind Bucky’s shoulder quickly before back down at your small model ocean. He lets out a defeated sigh and nods. 
“Hit.” You smile victoriously as you place the red pin on your screen. You had sunk his carrier, cruiser and submarine. There were only two left. “A11?” He guesses.
You shake your head. “Miss.” He places yet another white pin on his screen. “E1?” 
Bucky looks up at you suspiciously. “How are you so good at this?” 
“I just know you, my love.” You smile a little too big and Bucky’s eyes narrow. “What?”
“You’re lying.” He looks your face over. “How are you cheating? Can you see over here?” 
You let out an offended gasp. “I would never cheat!” Your tone is a little over dramatic, so you’re not really selling it, but it makes both of you dissolve into laughter. 
Bucky turns around and catches the reflection of his board in the wall mounted television. He nods in an impressed manner before turning back to look at you. “Nice. I’ll let slide because you’re about to push out our children but any other time…” He trails off wagging a finger at you. 
You laugh softly as he begins to pack away the game. “I love you, Buck.” You say sweetly. 
He smiles at you. “I love you too, pretty girl.” 
Hour Nine
“You’re at eight!” The nurse cheers. “Two more, mama! We’re so close!” You look over at her with a tired smile. You had been in and out of sleep since Bucky had packed away the Battleship game. 
Bucky runs his fingers up and down your arm. His fingertips offer some cooling comfort, but you’re exhausted. Nine hours of sitting in the room, getting hourly checks and not being able to move around besides small walks has taken a toll. 
“What do you need from me, pretty girl?” Bucky murmurs. 
You shrug. “I want this to be over with. I want to have them in our arms. Why is it taking so long?” You mumble in a trembling voice. You hadn’t realized how emotionally exhausted you were too. 
Bucky sighs sadly as he stares down at you. “I’m not sure, pretty girl. The doctor said every woman goes through labor differently.” 
“That does nothing to help me.” You snap at him. Bucky’s eyes widen and you squeeze your eyes shut willing the tears gathering in them to go away. 
You feel Bucky rub his hand up and down your arm. “You’re okay.” He whispers. “You can cry, pretty girl. Nobody is gonna judge you.” He says quietly, his other hand coming up to cup your cheek. 
You open your eyes to look at him apologetically. “I’m sorry.” You whisper, but he shakes his head. 
“Nothing you say or do while going through this is going to offend me.” He explains gently. “If you wanna yell at me, yell at me. Just let me help.” 
You laugh wetly. “I’m not gonna emotionally abuse you.” You rest your hand over his on your cheek. “I just need you here to listen to me complain and say I know it sucks.”
“That’s it?” He chuckles and you shrug. “And maybe get back in bed with me for a couple minutes.” He smiles and you scoot over a little bit. 
Bucky presses himself to your side and wraps a careful arm around you. You take a deep breath and rest your head against his shoulder. You don’t even notice the tears until Bucky begins to wipe them silently off your cheeks while pressing kisses to your forehead. 
“You got this, pretty girl. Just a little while longer.” 
You nod. “Get more jello for me, please?” You ask quietly. Bucky laughs, but moves to stand up. “The cherry flavor this time!” You call out as he opens the door, his laughter echoes in the hall and it makes you smile.
Hour Ten
“Nine! You’re doing so well! Your babies are almost here.” You smile brightly at the words and turn your head to look at Bucky. 
“You know you can sleep a little? You’ve been awake this entire time.” You urge. Bucky had been with you every minute you were awake. He ate when you were asleep so you wouldn’t be jealous of the food. Finished unpacking your go bag and talking to nurses, you couldn’t imagine that he had found the time to rest. “I don’t want you passing out when you see what happens when I push these kids out.” 
Bucky lets out a loud laugh. “I promise you I’ve seen worse.” He pulls one of the chairs up to sit beside you. Squeezing both of you on there had just become too hot and uncomfortable for you. “Besides, I slept for a little while you napped.” 
“For how long?” You cross your arms over your stomach. 
Bucky rubs the back of his neck. “Like twenty minutes? I’m fine, pretty girl. I used to go days without more than an hour of sleep. You don’t have to worry about me.” 
“That’s why I worry about you.” Your hand finds his resting beside you on the bed. “I know you’ll play it off until you pass out from exhaustion.” 
Bucky smiles like he’s surprised by your love for him. Maybe he still is, even after all this time together. You smile back. “I’m supposed to be the one comforting you, pretty girl. Not the other way around.” He teases. 
You shake your head. “I think we’ve always been good at comforting each other. Doesn’t matter when.” Bucky smiles brightly at you with a nod. 
“You’re always right.” He murmurs. “What would I do without you?” You open your mouth to respond. “Don’t answer. I don’t even like thinking about it.” 
Hour Eleven
“God. Fuck.” You groan. The pressure you feel mixed with the dulled contractions was awful. “Can I push? Please?” You look down at Dr. O. 
Your room has been set up with incubators, medical tools and you felt exposed to the group in front of you. She nods. “When you start, we’re gonna count to eight, okay? Then a rest period.” She looks between you and Bucky.
Bucky presses a quick kiss to your forehead before wrapping one of your hands between both of his. “Ready, mama?” You nod hastily as Dr. O begins to count out loud. 
“Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.” You squeeze your eyes shut and focus on her counting only letting out a breath when she says stop. “You look amazing right now.” Bucky whispers and you scoff.
“Just need you to breathe with her, Mr. Barnes.” Dr. O urges gently and he nods, breathing in with you before breathing out.
The routine breathing helps relax you for your small rest break before Dr. O begins counting again for another push. “You’re doing so well, pretty girl.” 
Bucky’s got his left hand interlocked with yours. “Breathe.” Dr. O lets out. “You’re so close.” She cheers you on.
“I can’t do this. I can’t.” You shake your head with teary eyes. After hours and hours of restlessness, you’re exhausted. You can’t help but feel this will take you out. You can hear your heart monitor spike a little. Bucky’s eyes frantically look around the room which does little to quell your worry. “Bucky.” You cry.
“We need to push, Mrs. Barnes.” Dr. O urges. You shake your head but stop when Bucky’s hand grips your chin and forces you to look at him. 
“You can do this.” His voice is stern. “You know you can. What did I say? This isn’t gonna be what takes you out, pretty girl.” You sniffle as you watch him talk. “You gotta push for me, okay?”
You take in a deep, shuddering breath before nodding. “Okay.” You say quietly before turning your attention back to Dr. O. “Okay.” 
Hour Twelve 
“A boy and a girl.” You murmur tiredly as Bucky pushes back stray hairs and wipes the sweat off your forehead. “Our babies.” 
“Our babies.” He agrees a little wetly. “You did amazing, pretty girl. I’m so fucking proud of you.” 
“Did you call the boys?” You ask. You can hear the cries echo in the room as nurses perform necessary checks. Bucky laughs. “I did. They’re in the waiting room.” He answers. 
“Are they okay?” You ask, unable to move and check yourself. Bucky looks over his shoulder before looking back down at you. “They are. They’re perfect, just getting cleaned up. A boy and a girl.” Bucky murmurs in awe. 
“Eleanor and Steven.” You whisper. “Can I hold them?”
“Soon.” Bucky smiles before leaning down to press a gentle kiss to your lips. “A couple more minutes.” 
》* 。 • ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ • 。* 。° 。* 。 • ˚《
notes // i’m so glad someone liked my arms will hold you enough to want more of it! i love family bucky, he has my heart. 
replies and reblogs are appreictaed if you enjoyed this! 💞
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thevirgodoll · 4 years
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hi! i was wondering if you have any tips to stay organized and stay on task? i’ve been doing a short online course this year and have really struggled to ACTUALLY bring myself to do the work, as assignments and lessons are not under any time constraints i just don’t do it. i also have adhd so get bored or distracted easily. do you have any tips for me?
This is really close to me because I also have ADHD. I have both inattentive and hyperactive type. *As a result, this academic tip guide will be a guide for people with ADHD and not neurotypical people, without disability. There is a difference.*
I am doing online as well this semester.
1. I create a schedule. If I do not create a schedule, I will be unproductive the entire day. So, what will help you is to do things in orderly fashion.
For example, at 12p - I will do this assignment/watch this lecture. You have to dictate what time you’re doing everything. Then, you also have to block out technology distractions while you are working. 
-> Even if you’ve gotten halfway through the day with no schedule, write down or block off times on your digital calendar for what you are going to do at each time. ADHD is easier to tackle if you break things down into smaller tasks.
*Pro tip that I almost forgot: before you do anything, wear your day clothes. Don’t wear pajamas. Actually getting dressed or even doing hair/makeup changes things.
2. Download the Forest app after you have created your schedule. I consistently recommend this because it works in increasing productivity. It allows you to set it for however long you’re doing this task, say 30 minutes.
-> Why?: It will block all apps on your phone for (insert time here) to plant a tree, and if you leave the app your “tree” will die. Eventually, the more sessions you do, the more points you will gain to plant different plants, and eventually plant real trees around the world.
3. Have a list (& a planner) as well. Not only is the schedule creating structure, but the list creates even more structure so you know what you need to get done for the day. It also helps you not fall victim to the classic symptom of forgetting. Each day, you should write down what you WANT to get done and create your own times to look at lecture and assignments. Have goals for the day.
For example: complete assignment 2.
If you do not have expectations with yourself before the day begins, your ADHD will kind of take over and do something else. I have structure to my day. I set a timer to wake up at the same time. I take my ADHD medicine 90 minutes before my final wake up time, and I do my morning routine once it kicks in. Having the same routine helps.
-> Focus on your goals. Don’t be super harsh about the times.
-> Don’t overwhelm with how many things on to do list. Again, break it up into small tasks. For example, one part being: Wash dishes or fold laundry. It makes it less overwhelming to your brain and gives you a choice of which task. Typical non ADHD people just tell you to prioritize tasks but that doesn’t work for us. Do it in a random order and it gets the job done.
4. TAKE BREAKS! The other side to this is making sure that you give yourself adequate breaks.
*For hyperfocus, wait til your hyperfocus has started to wear off. Use it to your advantage for peak productivity. It is no joke.*
-> The misconception is that some people with ADHD are lazy and as a result, some ADHDers won’t take breaks. You can take a break. Healthy, long breaks do more for you long term.
-> Have a timer set. For example, after a 45 minute session or an hour session, I will take a break to do another task that has nothing to do with studying, like laundry, eating a snack, or stretching. Then after that task is done, I will go back to studying.
5. Have a workspace. Only do work at this space. I do schoolwork at my living room table and it is perfect. I do not study in my room because that is my sanctuary for relaxation and rest, not productivity. Make an effort to make the workspace clean, with your supplies - laptop, notebooks, pens, etc - readily available.
-> Once I get to my workspace, everything for the morning is already done. I’ve done my morning routine, so all there is left to do is hydrate while I study.
6. Recognize if you have adequate energy to do the task. Sometimes, with ADHD you may neglect your needs. If you are not getting enough rest, here are some tips:
•Bed should be for rest only.
•Blackout curtains
•Lavender essential oil, I have a diffuser but you can also put it on your pillow
•Background noise: pick what you want, lo fi music, rain sounds, binaural beats, singing bowls
•If all else fails, ADHD is often comorbid with other illnesses, meaning you could have a form of depression causing insomnia for example. This should be considered if you are having long term issues and symptoms.
7. Don’t overdo it. We are not neurotypical. Executive dysfunction is real - meaning our brains actually shut down when it perceives a task to be mundane.
-> You do not have to fit everything into one schedule for the sake of being “productive”. Each day should be what you know you can do, and there are different days to tackle different goals.
-> When you feel like you cannot continue, which is literally a symptom of ADHD, sit still for a few minutes.
8. Have a “What I Did Today” List. Because of how ADHD actually makes us feel, we don’t realize how much work we have put in. ADHD actually can be explained easily, we have about 2 dopamine workers showing up to work while most people are at maximum capacity. We are working overtime to do our best, even on medicine. So, acknowledging what we did today is good and encouraging, or at least reflecting in a journal.
9. Play music. It’s recommended to play study music without words because with ADHD we will submerge ourselves into the playlist of nostalgic 90s R&B. I recommend lo fi hip hop on YouTube, video game instrumentals, classical music, or jazz instrumentals. Whatever gets you going just do it!
General ADHD tips:
•Rewrite lecture notes and type the lecture notes.
•Color code with bright colors and pretty drawings or calligraphy
•Instead of telling yourself “I need to take notes” which usually leads to procrastination say “Rewrite lecture notes and emphasize main points” ... this is useful in your to do list but in everyday goals
•Generally try to get your assignments done ahead of time if there is structure to certain courses, if not, again, stick to the schedule. If you slip one day off your schedule then don’t beat yourself up. Breathe!!!
•Side effect of most ADHD meds is that you’re not hungry so buy easy things to eat like muscle milk or yogurt and granola or smoothies so you can sustain yourself
•Get a dry erase board to show what you need to do for the day and put it on the fridge with command strips
•To avoid forgetting things, put them at a table near the door where you leave your apartment/dorm/house.
•Don’t overthink the time it takes to get ready, often that’s why ADHDers are late. Better to be super early than late though - have a routine set so you know how long each task takes - for example “I know a shower takes me 15 mins, washing my face takes 60 seconds and a few more including sunscreen/moisturizer, etc...”
•In that same grain, set timers for going to the bathroom, showering, etc just in case you one day hyperfocus and push yourself too far
•Open the blinds!!!!
•Clean your room and tidy up your space. A cluttered space impacts your mental health in a really negative way. Your space reflects your mental state at times as well, so check in with yourself. Have a specific day where you know you’re going to clean, but ADHD sometimes gives us bursts of cleaning so take advantage of that as well.
•Anytime your water bottle empties refill it. Have your water bottle or mason jar next to your workspace, and drink 5-10 gulps. Seriously. ADHD depends a lot on hydration, especially if you are on medicine which naturally dehydrates you. If you do not stay hydrated, you’ll get that massive headache mid day and crash sooner. A lot of times, lack of productivity can be due to not drinking enough water.
•If you don’t take medication, then sometimes you may notice you love coffee, and that’s because it’s a stimulant. Too much of anything is not good, but balance it with water. If you’re going to use coffee to kinda “medicate” then do it close to when you’re going to be productive.
•Setting yourself up to do a task rather than envisioning the overwhelming act of doing the entire action. “Okay, lets just get up and get the first step down, such as opening the laptop or wetting the toothbrush.” Baby steps.
•Take advantage of accommodations! Your college more than likely has an Office of Disability Services. Also, email your professors...they’re actually just as stressed as you about classes being online.
•Remember that you’re already trying as hard as you can, so don’t listen to the narrative of “try harder”, “you’re *r word*”, “you’re cheating by using medication”, “just do it,” “it’s easy,” “what’s so hard about it?” or “you’re lazy”. Anyone telling you that, even yourself, is wrong. And DO NOT allow anyone to be ableist, even yourself.
•Validate yourself. Don’t let anyone to do the “I experience that too”/“I know what you mean”/“we ALL have trouble with this!” and they don’t have ADHD. No. It’s our experience, it’s valid, and unlike anything on the planet. If you’re reading this and you don’t have ADHD - no, you do not experience any of the things in my next bullet point.
•Don’t be hard on yourself if you stumble along the way getting this right. ADHD completely changes your executive functioning.
We see the task, but our brain blocks it.
We have something marked down as “important” but our brain tosses it out in the “trash”.
We watch an entire episode of a show, but our brain ignored the entire thing. Our brain picks and chooses what is stimulating, our brain changes our interests.
We have sensory overload, we have no dopamine, we have bursts of curiosity that cannot be contained (often inconvenient) and if interrupted, our brains cannot take it.
People often discount how many things ADHD actually changes because it’s widely misunderstood. I want to take the time to acknowledge that ADHD, formerly known as simply ADD, has different types: primarily inattentive, primarily hyperactive-impulsive, or combined which is what I have. So it’s not “hyper” and “relatable”. It is also not a buzzword to use to describe things. I must put stereotypes and misrepresentations of ADHD to rest.
It impacts us emotionally as well, which most people don’t know... such as rejection dysphoria — extreme sensitivity to being criticized to where our brains self destruct. Our brains don’t regulate emotions well.
ADHDers - do not fall victim to how everyone else operates and call yourself a failure. We have to work twice as hard and the results actually come out brilliant especially with our determination and imaginative ideas that are also seen in autistic individuals, honorable mention!
There’s good days and bad days. There’s literal changes in thinking that other people do not experience. We all collectively know wouldn’t be who we are without ADHD, but we all recognize the challenges. However, it makes me happy to see messages like this so that I can make a difference and hopefully help one person with ADHD, especially of color, at a time stop being so hard on themselves. 💗
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castleshadows · 3 years
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Honeydew
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Poppy and Casteel attend a banquet with several important members of court, and Casteel decides to be innapropriate at the worst time.
Written May 24, 2021
The banquet hall was filled with people from all across Atlantia, coming to celebrate the Queen’s coronation, a year after it actually happened. The War of Two Queens, as all had taken to calling it, had been brutal and had lasted what felt like forever despite the real fighting ending after a little less than three months. Apparently when you had the gods on your side, war ended much more quickly.
Poppy swept through the hall, her deep green and golden embellished gown making a delightful swishing noise as she walked. Her subjects stopped and bowed as she passed, and she nodded, still a little uncomfortable with the whole bowing thing, but too hungry to take the time to encourage all of them to stand.
Kieran walked a foot or two behind her, surveying the large room as if on guard duty. Her real guards were a couple steps behind her Royal Advisor, looking at every newcomer as if they were a potential threat. Poppy glanced at Delano, who was eyeing a blonde-haired man as if he were holding a knife to her throat. She rolled her eyes, but didn’t attempt to stop him. She’d already tried several times and it never worked.
The room had gone considerably quieter, and though her guests still murmured occasionally to one another, all eyes were on her. Poppy was rather proud of herself that she managed not to squirm under their gaze.
She eventually made it to the head table at the back of the hall, which raised on a platform, a couple feet in the air. Casteel and several other noblemen were all waiting to take their seats. Apparently, it was custom in Atlantia for the most powerful ruler to enter the room last, and no one was allowed to take their seats or start dining until the ruler announced the start of the feast. Several days ago, she’d tried to convince her husband to enter with her, finding it ridiculous that the Royal Advisor was supposed to walk by her side, but not the King. Casteel, of course, had ardently refused, saying that it was her big entrance, and she should own it or whatever. She’d agreed, only because she knew she would get nowhere no matter how much she protested, but that didn’t mean it made any sense.
Her footsteps echoed throughout the room, and Poppy inwardly cringed at how loud they sounded in the silence. She took the steps as quickly as she could without tripping in the heels she had been given to wear. She’d practiced walking up these steps in the raised shoes too many times to trip now.
When she reached her seat, Casteel pulled it backwards, the loud scrape of the wooden legs across the floor practically deafening. Her husband, sensing her anxiety, took her hand in his callused one, and gave her a supportive smile. Poppy smiled back, but even though she couldn’t see it, she could feel how strained the expression was. Cas responded with a quick kiss to her temple, and then dropped her hand stepping back towards his seat.
Poppy cleared her throat and raised her voice, “Let the feast begin.”
Immediately, much of the stress drained out of her. Having to speak to such a large crowd had always been one of her biggest anxieties, and having that part over and done with left a feeling of euphoric relief.
Casteel grasped her hand again, and Poppy realized that she was still standing. She sat down so quickly that she almost missed the chair altogether. She blushed and pulled the seat closer to the table, settling into the surprisingly comfortable cushion.
Conversation resumed again, and servants poured out from all sides of the room to uncover dishes and offer other treats that weren’t set out onto the table. Poppy reached for a plate of ham but was beaten to it by Kieran who speared the two pieces she had been going for on his fork.
“Really, Kieran?”
Kieran looked up from the piece of ham that was halfway to his mouth and raised an eyebrow.
“What?”
Poppy just shook her head, returning to her plate which had apparently already been heaped with different meats, fruits, and other assorted foods that she liked. And cheese. Lots of cheese.
“Is that enough?” Casteel asked, his plate still empty. He was probably waiting to serve himself until she was satisfied.
“How much do you think I eat?” Poppy replied, scooping some potatoes onto her fork, “Yes, Hawke, this is more than enough.”
The chocolate and berries taste swelled as it did every time Poppy called him that. And so did the smoky taste of arousal. But, that was ever-present around her, so it wasn’t much of a surprise.
He chuckled and started to serve himself, but saved the best pieces for someone else. Probably her. It was unlikely he’d bother saving anything for Kieran.
“Your Majesty?”
Poppy turned her head, quickly swallowing the chunk of cheese she’d stuffed in her mouth, and searched for the source of the voice. Her eyes landed on a rather stout man with Atlantian eyes and graying brown hair. Lord Donahue if she remembered correctly. She really hoped she did. There had been no embarrassments so far this evening, and she would’ve liked to keep it that way.
“Yes, Lord Donahue?” If she had gotten his name wrong, he didn’t correct her. “Your Majesty, I was wondering if now would be a good time to discuss the building of healing centers throughout smaller towns?”
“Yes of course,” Poppy set down her fork and turned her attention to the Atlantian, “What is it you would like to discuss.”
It was easy to get lost in the conversation, as it was something that was quite important to Poppy. She had been the one to come up with this particular project after learning that several smaller communities in Atlantia didn’t have access to the medical care that those who lived in Evaemon or any of the much bigger cities did. It was something that would be needed across the kingdom, especially after the war, with all the soldiers who had come home injured and in need of constant care. She had become rather passionate about the cause, and did most of the work herself, though she was forced to bring in Casteel or Kieran occasionally to help run numbers. Math was not one of her strong suits. Mostly though, they were a supportive presence, answering any question she had and helping with anything she needed them to.
Lord Donahue’s questions, thankfully, were ones she had answered a million times before. Repetitive, yes, but a lot easier than answering the difficult logistics questions several of the Treasurers often had.
Poppy ended up mostly tuning out of the conversation, and paying more attention to what was around her than the answers she was reciting from memory. Kieran was already through his fourth piece of ham, and was reaching for another one, but was slapped away by Casteel. Her husband was barley half-way through his plate, paying more attention to her conversation with Lord Donahue than she was.
Just then, a servant walked by carrying a bowl of assorted fruits passed by their seats. She stopped near Poppy, offering the fruit to her. Poppy absently-mindedly waved her away, and the woman continued onto Casteel.
“Would you like anything, Your Majesty,” she asked him.
Poppy was vaguely aware of nodding at something the Lord said, and lifting her glass to her mouth to take a sip of the wine.
“Some of that honeydew would be perfect, thank you.”
Poppy choked on her drink, sending her into a small coughing fit. Some of her drink splattered across her cleavage, and she grabbed a napkin to mop it up.
“Your Majesty, are you alright?” Lord Donahue looked very concerned and attempted to shove an armful of napkins towards her. She waved him away, coughing once more and then clearing her throat.
“I’m fine, thank you.” He still looked concerned, but backed off.
Poppy glanced at Casteel out of the corner of her eye and the bastard was smirking. She shot him a glare that he either didn’t see or ignored (probably the latter) and turned her attention back to Donahue.
“What were you saying, my lord?”
Casteel let the conversation continue uninterrupted for another minute at most before he picked up a piece of honeydew between two fingers and brought it to his mouth. Locking eyes with her, he slowly bit into it, the juice dribbling down his chin and fingers. He chewed slowly, almost… sensually, and ate the rest of it. Then he took his fingers, and one by one swirled his tongue across the digits, licking up every drop of the liquid.
He smiled then, showing just a hint of fang, and that damned heat in her stomach curled and twisted. She squirmed a bit and he smirked. The bastard knew exactly what he was doing.
“Your Majesty?” Lord Donahue said somewhere in the background. Poppy wasn’t able to focus on anything other than her husband bringing another piece of the green fruit up to his full lips and taking a bite, his golden gaze still connected with hers.
Casteel brought his thumb across his chin, wiping up the remaining juice and stuck it in his mouth, sucking the last bit of the flavor off of his skin.
“Delicious,” he said, and that one word made the flesh between her legs throb that much harder.
She brought her glass up to her mouth, the cup shaking in her unsteady hand, and took a long sip.
“But you’re better.”
Water spewed across the table, and the coughing fit resumed.
Several servants in the vicinity rushed to clean up the mess, shoving napkins at her at a concerning rate. This whole debacle was all but ignored by Poppy who didn’t look away from her grinning husband.
“Casteel!”
“What,” he said, speaking a piece of potato with his fork and inspecting it, “I was just commenting on how the flavor of the honeydew wasn’t nearly as lush and sweet as the flavor of your—”
Poppy snapped into action before he could say anything truly embarrassing, and slapped a hand over his mouth. This got the attention of Kieran, who up until that point, had been studiously ignoring everything that was going on to his left and continuing to eat large amounts of ham.
He looked up from his plate, rolled his eyes at the scene before him, and proceeded to usher away all the servants and make sure all eyes were averted from the King and Queen before turning to Poppy with a world-weary look.
“Poppy I swear to the gods if you and Casteel don’t let me have my dinner in peace, I don’t care that you are Meyyah Liessa, I will drag you out of this hall by the hair if I have to.”
Poppy subconsciously, gripped her hair as if she was trying to protect it, and then blushed removing her hand from Casteel’s mouth.
“Sorry,” she muttered, clearing her throat and dabbing at her now wet plate.
“Thank you,” Kieran replied dryly, shoving more ham in his mouth. Good gods, how much ham did he plan to eat.
“Your Majesty?” Lord Doanhue said nervously, looking from Poppy to Casteel and then back again, “Would there be a better time for us to talk?”
“No, not at all,” she replied, shooting Casteel a warning glance, “Now is fine.”
Her husband did not heed the warning whatsoever, taking the last remaining piece of honeydew, and in front of everyone, giving it a long, sensual lick. Poppy’s eyes went wide, and she could vaguely hear Kieran sighing behind her.
She turned back to the Lord one last time, “On second thought, why do we postpone this discussion until a later date.”
The Atlantian, nodded frantically and then dashed off, taking his plate with him.
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canyouhearthelight · 3 years
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The Miys, Ch. 129
Despite the last couple weeks of work being profoundly exhausting (think 60 hours, easily), I am proud that I’ve been able to keep writing and stay ahead! I literally could not have done that without @baelpenrose, @charlylimph-blog, @the-raven-fae, and @anotherusrname. Y’all are my real-world rocks when everything gets crazy.
***Shameless Plug: @the-raven-fae has the first episode of the podcast up now! you can find it here!! ***
The other thing that has been keeping me going is each and every one of you who has found this story and binged it from start to finish as a speed-run. I can’t even name all of you at this point, but I want you all to know that I see it, and it makes me smile so hard my face hurts.
Now, who is ready for some Charly shenanigans?
A few days later, I had just enough time to sweep dinner off the table in my quarters before Charly unceremoniously dropped a long something in the midst of us with a dull thud.  Immediately, a rusty red cloud rose up and set us all into a fit of tears and coughing.
Out in the hallway, I was eventually able to convince my lungs to at least try to breathe long enough to wheeze out, “Geezus, Charly, what the hell was that?”
“Soooo….” Uh oh. “ItmayneedsomecalibrationthecloudwasntsupposedtobethatbigandIdidntmeanforittogooffbut - “
I shook my head and typed a quick message on my datapad. “Please breathe because right now I don’t think the rest of us can and I would love to know why.”
She stopped rushing out what I think were words long enough to read the message and try again. “Chili powder arrows. I think I need to recalibrate them, though, because it shouldn’t have gone off at less than one hundred and twenty kilometers per hour, and there’s no way I set it down that hard.”
“Why?” I rasped, still swallowing as hard as I could and mentally begging Noah to bring us some water or a medical transport.
“Defensive measures,” she insisted. “Scent navigation is really common in the Galactic community, and so is sensitivity to capsaicin, so…”
“Makes sense,” Conor managed to get out as he tried to gasp for air. “Even Noah.”
“Bit much.” I pinched my fingers as closely as I could without touching - which was more difficult than expected considering that I was shaking.
Maverick was the first to get up off the floor of the corridor, just as the medical transport arrived.  He and Charly helped us on before distributing bottles of water to rinse our mouths and eyes. “It was… a good idea…” he panted once we were all seated. “Just… bit overkill…”
“The range of the cloud is only supposed to be five feet,” she insisted fretfully. “And I swear the pressure sensor is supposed to be calibrated to only go off if it’s fired from a bow or swung really, really hard.”
“Who...want...swing?”  I was honestly starting to get dizzy fighting my airways to breathe.
Once we arrived at a medbay, Charly helped a couple of Miys’ bodies get us out of the transport and lying down in berths. In a glitch-like transition, suddenly I could breathe easily and she was joined by Arthur and Coffey in sitting with us.
“Wait… when did… I’m so confused,” I admitted, my voice only slightly strained.
“Lethe field, apparently,” Arthur shrugged. “You didn’t want to be awake for that.”
Conor sat up and rubbed his sternum. “I remember chili pepper arrows - Charly, love, that was brilliant except the, you know, going off bit - and getting off the transport.”
“Respiratory lavage,” Charly winced. “You know, war crime if done incorrectly?”
I shuddered and nodded. “Yep. Didn’t want to be awake for that, thanks.  Glad I can’t remember, don’t ever want to, would rather remember the pepper bomb you set off. At point blank range?”
She snuggled further down in Coffey’s lap as he gently rubbed her scalp with his fingertips.  Arthur spoke in her defense, instead. “She’s sending the schematics to Zach and Derek to find out what went wrong.  Tactically, they were a brilliant idea - she’s right about the large amount of species who would react even worse than you did if hit with one.”
“I only inhale spices figuratively.  I would prefer not to do it literally - like, ever again.”
Maverick sat up and gave Charly a curious look. “You said they can be swung… Unless I saw something wrong, the arrow was only two feet long.  Who would want to swing something like that?”
Coffey and Arthur both held up gas masks and wiggled them. “Between my arm reach and the length of one of those, I could do it, no problem.”
“We aren’t all so fortunate,” Arthur intoned drily. “Plus, that doesn’t mean someone closer isn’t getting hit.”
Conor raised his hand politely before pointing out a potential flaw. “What if they have gas masks?”
“Noah has a topical reaction,” I answered, my mind racing. “And I assume we have other measures in the works?”
“Multiple types of sonic weaponry are being tested,” Coffey intoned with a nod. “Sub- and ultrasonics, infrasound, and just loud music.”
Still in full Devil’s Advocate mode, Conor persisted. “And if they are covered, head to toe, and none of that works?”
A deafening silence filled the medbay. The prospect of being forcibly boarded had only been a known issue for a week, and apparently this prospect hadn’t been covered yet in the defensive planning.
Finally, it was Maverick who spoke up. Had anyone else been talking, we couldn’t have heard him, but in the quiet his whisper echoed like a gunshot. “The interior hull is organic, not magnetic.”
“Mav, we know that. It doesn’t help us.” Conor’s voice was confused.
Arthur, however, looked like he had just seen a travesty occur in front him, unable to stop it. “You’re talking about blowing the airlocks.”
I scrambled to sit up, clawing at the blanket that covered my legs. “What!? Maverick, he’s wrong, right? You aren’t talking about that, right?”
“It makes logical sense,” Charly added, still laying her head against Coffey’s chest. “If someone boards the Ark by force, and they have enough gear that no amount of defense we mount even bothers them, they would be wearing enough gear to survive being blown into space.”
“And they can’t magnetize to the hull,” Maverick confirmed. “Maybe the outside, but not inside.”
“What about Noah?” I demanded. “They are a non-combatant.”
“Noah evolved in vacuum,” Charly pointed out.
“You’re talking a war strategy!” I nearly shouted. “What about Arthur? Coffey? Or Ivan? Are you seriously going to tell me they won’t be the first people charging to defend the Ark?” I pointed at the previously brandished gas masks with a damning glare.
“We are talking about a last-ditch defense to save as many people on this ship as possible,” she whispered.  “I don’t make the decisions, I just make the tools they are going to use. You know, you know I don’t want us to use any of this. And I plan to booby-trap everything within an inch of all our lives to keep us from having to use as much of it as possible.  Hence, arrows. As many kinds as I can make up.”
I started taking deep breaths, trying to calm down. At my heart of hearts, I knew she was sincere - Charly was almost as much of a pacifist as I was, at the end of the day. Even Arthur wasn’t necessarily a warmonger, just… uninhibited in what he defined as ‘the best defense is a good offense’.
Frustrated, I swung my legs over the side of the berth. “I need to go home. I want dinner, and a nap.  Probably a drink.”
Charly reached out and pushed my legs back on to the bed. “You’re under observation for another hour. Dry-drowning risk.”
I groaned and gave her a pleading look. “I’m hungry, and this isn’t my bed.  It’s honestly half the reason I’m in such a bad mood. You and Arthur probably make absolute perfect sense to less-sleepy, fed Sophia, but right now, not so much.”
“Your limey assistant is bringing a change of clothes, your sister, and some food,” Arthur smirked. “So you get to stay right there,  not die, and get some sleep.”
“But Mac…”
“Is at Derek and Sam’s, but very nice try,” he confessed.
“I wanna go home,” I grumbled sullenly.
Maverick nodded, and gulped down some water Charly handed him. “Did someone turn on the scrubbers in there yet?”
Conor and I turned wide eyes to him. The thought apparently never occurred to either of us. “Charly love,” Conor started hesitantly. “How much bigger was the cloud than you thought?”
“I’m not sure,” she confessed, sheepish. “It was pretty big.”
Rubbing my face briskly, I suppressed the urge to sob. “My blankets… the furniture… our clothes…”
“Else is working on it.”
I glanced at Coffey, confused. “Else is? They eat iron.”
Noah’s voice broke in from the ceiling. “Correction. When still a bacterium, Else fed on iron. However, as they have evolved, their needs have expanded to include a more diverse diet.”
“Are you telling me that there are faceless baby chickens flooding our quarters, eating the chili powder?”
“They do show a preference for foods more toxic to the general Galaxy.  We estimate that this is due to their origin within human beings, who share the same marked trait.”
“At least someone is appreciating my hard work,” Charly grumbled.
I strained to suppress a smile. “I’ll make you whatever you want for dinner, for a week, to make up for being ungrateful?”
“Maybe just tell Alistair it was an accident?  He gets upset when you almost die.”
“Both?”
“Both. Both is good.”
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nicosbrainrot · 3 years
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here's something I wrote after talking to @kamiart about rin's fight in round 3 because I am full of love for rin & wanted to write an interaction for them <3
~
Ikuto was watching from the seats with the rest of his classmates. It was the third round of the sports festival and Rin was going up against Taishiro, both students in Sato sensei's class. The fight was a fast paced one, and it seemed like Rin could win it, depending on how much energy she had reserved, she had the advantage seeing that Taishiro couldn't use his quirk on her projectiles. Ikuto watched diligently, knowing that her quirk required moonlight and so she was running on a limited supply. She had faked out her last opponent by pretending to run out of energy, but after two whole fights she might actually be running low. Eventually she threw a kick at her opponent, which he quickly rewound and sent her flying. She wouldn't get up close unless she had to, this meant she was out of energy. The fight now could easily turn in Taishiro's favor but they locked onto each other, caught in a struggle with neither letting up. Suddenly Taishiro said something, not quite audible to the audience, but Ikuto could make out the word "dad," and he could see, even from the stands, something change in Rin's expression.
She said something, low and quiet, before shouting, "At least you have a father to fight for!" Her voice shot through the stadium, and she said something else, though still not quite audible, before shouting again, something about being able to do this on her own, and their surroundings quickly exploded into a bright flash of blinding light, but only for a moment.
Ikuto looked back at the arena after the blinding flash and saw as Rin stood there, staggering, and almost shot up from his seat when her body collapsed to the floor. Taishiro didn't seem to have done any damage, that was the result of her quirk, the result of her energy reserves being completely depleted. He watched as Miss Me quickly rushed into the ring, declaring Taishiro the winner and announcing that he would progress to the next round, as they brought an unconscious Rin off of the field and towards Recovery Girl's office.
After the crowd cheered and fell to a chatter, as it did between every round, Ikuto's thoughts began racing. Many students had been quite roughed up by the end of their fight, but none due to their own quirk. Well, some had overexerted themselves a bit, but they all ended up fine. Ikuto knew the nature of Rin's quirk, that she had an energy reserve that overlapped with her body's own natural calories, which it would cut into when her lunar energy had run out. If it was anything like he was imagining, and she was really on empty when that flash of light happened, she could be in pretty bad shape.
He quickly turned to Hoshizawa, who was sitting next to him on the bench. "I... I'm gonna go check on her, if that's okay."
"Oh yeah, sure." they said, seeming fine to be left on his own.
Ikuto got up out of his seat and headed down in the direction of Recovery Girl's office. He made his way down the hallway and peaked inside the room. Rin was now laying on the bed, still unconscious, Recovery Girl tending to her.
"Uh, excuse me." Ikuto spoke softly, and Recovery Girl turned around to face him. "I'm sorry to intrude, but..."
"You wanted to check on her?" she asked in her cheery tone.
Ikuto just nodded, stepping in from the doorway. He could see that her breathing was shaky, and his brow furrowed just slightly in worry.
"She isn't physically injured, but her body has depleted all its energy, she's overexerted herself. Sadly, I can't do anything to help her besides standard treatment." she told him.
Her quirk allowed her to help a person's body heal at a rapid pace but depleted the person's energy, which was the opposite of what Rin needed right now. He thought for a moment before turning to face the short nurse.
"I could get her something out of the vending machine." he suggested.
She smiled up at him. "Oh, that would be lovely, how sweet." she said, her chipper tone contrasting with Ikuto's monotone voice.
He nodded and quickly turned to leave, walking down the hall to one of the vending machines scattered around the building. He pulled out some money, which he kept loose in his pocket after Aito stole his wallet a few too many times and he got tired of asking for it back. He looked at all the drinks and decided on a bottle of fruit juice, it was sugary but not too processed, and he wasn't sure if she liked soda. He also got her a candy bar, the more she could eat after all this the better. He went back to the nurse's office, quietly walking inside and placing the food and drink on the table beside the bed.
Recovery Girl pulled out a bottle of medication, and Ikuto immediately remembered the bottle he saw near her bed when they were going through everyone's dorm rooms, it was heart medication. He looked over at Rin, who was still asleep on the bed, her breathing choppy. "Her heart, is it..." he started, not looking up from the bedridden girl.
"It's quick and irregular. I have this for her, but I can't give it to her until she wakes up." she said, setting the bottle down on the table.
Ikuto looked over to Recovery Girl. "Would you... like me to try and steady it?" he asked, unsure if she would trust him with that.
She was aware of his quirk, and thought for a moment. "If you're positive you know what you're doing." she said, a bit of hesitation in her voice.
"I do." Ikuto said calmly, and pulled up a chair next to her bed.
He sat down and placed his hand on her inner wrist. He could feel the irregularity in her pulse, and as he activated his quirk he could almost feel the pressure her heart was under. It wasn't unlike that of someone who was malnourished, the strain that puts on your heart. In fact, it was in that moment that Ikuto realized how thin she was, that she was underweight. His worry grew, because that only made the results of overexerting herself worse and far more dangerous. He made a mental note to check in on her eating if given the chance. However, right now he needed to focus, it wasn't difficult to slow her heart rate but steadying it took more concentration. He brought her heart rate down to a normal level, and kept it consistent. If he let go it would return to it's staggered pace, so he just sat there for a while, hand gently resting on her arm.
There was a television in the room silently playing footage of the current round, and Ikuto watched as the quiet battle took place on screen, taking note of any interesting strategies he saw. More and more times passed, and quite a few rounds came and went, but he was in no rush to leave.
After about an hour, Rin shifted slightly. Ikuto resisted his instinctual urge to pull away, not wanting to cause a jolt in her heart rate, and instead gradually let go of his quirk's hold on her, allowing her heart to return to it's irregular pace slowly. Recovery Girl quickly walked over and picked up the bottle of medication as Rin slowly woke up, and Ikuto let his hand fall down to his lap, getting a strange feeling from being disconnected after an hour sitting there holding pace for her.
Recovery Girl set her hand on Rin's shoulder as she slowly sat up, very groggy, holding a hand to her head. She blinked a few times, still exhausted, trying to reorient herself and remember what exactly happened before passing out. Recovery Girl handed her a glass of water and her medicine, which she took with a quiet "thank you" before turning to see Ikuto sitting near the bed.
His shoulders suddenly tensed up as he realized that she may think it's weird of him to have been here this whole time, seeing that they don't know each other very well, but tried his best not to let his worry show and looked up at her with as soft an expression as he could manage.
Rin's face showed a bit of surprise at the sight of someone in the room with her besides the nurse who she had seen just hours earlier. It took them both a moment of awkward silence before Ikuto finally spoke.
"How are you feeling? Are you alright?" he asked, a bit of worry in his voice.
"I... Yeah, I'm alright." she said. She felt exhausted but she wasn't horrible.
"You should eat something." he stated, reaching for the drink and candy bar to hand them to her. "Or uh, drink something... or I could get you something else, but you need something in your system after all that."
It was a bit strange to have this usually very quiet and reserved boy suddenly fussing over making sure she ate. She hesitantly reached out and took the now lukewarm drink and candy bar out of his hands.
"Th-thank you." she said quietly, not really looking him in the eyes.
She looked down at the candy bar in her hands for a moment before slowly unwrapping it and taking a bite. Ikuto just sat there, looking up at the match on the screen, but not really paying much attention to it, he just didn't want to stare at her while she ate.
When she finished the candy bar she realized just how hungry she actually was and silently wished she had another one as she opened the bottle of juice Ikuto had bought her and took a sip.
"I couldn't hear much of what you said during the match but..." he started, before turning to face her. "It was something about family, wasn't it?"
She slowly brought the bottle down from her mouth and swallowed nervously, remembering what exactly had triggered the outburst that landed her in this hospital bed. "Yeah... it was." she said, and for a moment Ikuto thought that was all she would say about it before she looked up at him and asked, "What is your family like, Maekawa-san?"
His eyebrows raised in surprise at the question, and he looked away for a moment to think. "I have a little brother." he said, not looking up from the floor. "He's a bit of a handful, really playful and likes to cause trouble, but he's a sweet kid." She could see a small smile on his face as he spoke.
"You sound like you care for him very much." she said softly, and he did, she could hear it in the way he spoke.
"I... I do." he said, looking as if he had just realized something. "I have to admit, I miss him since moving into the dorms."
There was a moment of silence, though not quite awkward, before she asked, "Y-your parents, what about them?" and there was curiosity in her voice.
He looked up at her, something in his expression that she couldn't quite place, and he hesitated before speaking. "They..." he started, before turning away from her again, looking back at the floor.
"They both have very different ways of showing that they care. My dad has... high expectations. He always says I can do better, wants me to be the best I can. And my mom, she thinks I'm more capable than I really am... and I don't want her to realize she's wrong." He looked back up at her and saw a strange expression on her face, and worried he had said something wrong. "Ah, I shouldn't be complaining. I love my family, they're not bad, I just..." He looked down for a moment before looking back up to meet Rin's gaze. "I don't want to let them down, you know?"
Rin looked him in the eyes for a moment before staring down at her hands, still holding the juice bottle she'd barely drank out of. "No... I don't know, actually." She hesitated for a moment. "I've... never had a family to disappoint."
Ikuto stiffened a bit, surprised, and his head tilted slightly to one side, questioningly, eyebrows furrowed in confusion and slight concern at what she had said.
She took this as a request to elaborate. "I... I grew up in a-an orphanage... and I never got adopted, s-so I don't have a family... and I don't think I ever will." she said in a soft voice, a hint of sadness, but mostly just a reluctant acceptance.
He let out a small sigh as he processed this, eyes not leaving Rin's tired but serious face, looking at her and suddenly realizing something. "You mean... you've done all this on your own?" he asked her, his voice slightly more gentle than usual.
Now it was Rin's turn to look confused. "W-what do you mean?" she asked.
"All of this, getting to UA, training to become a hero, you did all that... alone?" he asked, head leaning forward slightly, eyes looking up at her with a soft gaze, as if he were asking if she was okay.
"I..." she started, looking down at her hands for a moment. "I guess so..." She had never really stopped to think about it, everything that had gotten her to this point in her life. She tried to not look back.
Ikuto sat back in his seat and looked off to the side, thinking to himself. He had a great deal of respect for all of his classmates, but to get here without the support of a family was quite a feat, and he hadn't realized before just how driven Rin was. Despite her very quiet and somewhat sad demeanor, it was clear that she worked very hard to get here and was determined to achieve her goals.
Ikuto looked up at her, realizing he was lost in thought for a moment, and finally spoke. "Thank you for sharing this with me, Tsukikage-san. It's... truly admirable that you've gotten here on your own." he told her.
Rin looked over at him, surprised at the praise. "I-it's really nothing." she said, and she really didn't see it as much, it was just what she had to do, and she still had so far to go.
"But it isn't." he stated, surprised that she would say something like that. "You've done a lot, it's important to acknowledge the progress you've made."
She stared at him, thinking about his words carefully. He was right, she had done a lot, gone through so much hardship, all on her own, but it all seemed so small compared to what the future might hold for her. After all this, she wondered if she could make it the rest of the way.
He saw something shift in her expression as she looked at him. He could see worry on her face, as if she had been trying not to think about all of this and he had suddenly pulled it out of her. "I'm sorry, I- I'm sure it's been hard, but... you aren't alone anymore, you know." he started, desperately trying to comfort her but feeling very unsure of what to say. "We- if you ever need anything, anything at all, you can tell me... and I'll try my very best to help." He spoke to her with genuine care in his voice, and she knew he meant his words.
"I-" she started, but couldn't get anything out. She was touched by his kindness, but something felt bittersweet about it. She would be hesitant to reach out to her classmates for anything, but just knowing that she could, with at least one of them, was comforting. She almost felt tears stinging her eyes but held them back. She had wanted for so long to have a family, to feel loved and as though she belonged somewhere, to feel wanted. Yet here she was, after losing the third round foolishly, one of her classmates sitting by her side, worried about her. It had been so long since anyone was worried about her.
She turned away from him, almost ashamed that she didn't know what to say to him. "P-please don't worry about me, I'm fine, r-really." she muttered.
"I know." he said, causing her to look up at him in surprise. "You've made it this far, I know you're capable, but... my offer still stands." His voice softened at that last bit.
He said this so matter-of-factly, it almost puzzled her. She didn't need help, didn't want to be a burden, but... he seemed so sincere. Could this just be pity? No, she didn't hear any pity in his voice, in fact he spoke as if he were talking about something so simple. At that moment she didn't know what to feel or think.
"Do you not like the juice?" he asked, snapping her out of her spiralling thoughts before she even realized she hadn't responded. "You haven't drank much of it, I can get you something else."
"Oh…" She looked down at the bottle still in her hands. "N-no it's fine… thank you, though." she said softly. 
Ikuto just let out a quiet "hm" as he leaned back, not really believing her but figuring it's best to just let it be. The two of them sat in silence for a while, another match on the television coming to a close as Rin slowly sipped her juice.
After a while Ikuto finally cleared his throat and began to stand up. "I uh, should probably let you rest, and get back to the stands." He turned to her once he was standing. "Unless you would like me to stay."
"N-no, it's alright." she said before hesitating for a moment. "Th-thank you for coming to check on me… You really didn't have to." 
"Of course." he said, almost surprised that she would thank him. "I hope you recover quickly… Oh, I almost forgot." he said, quickly pulling out his phone. "I can give you my number, if you'd like, just in case."
She nodded, taking out her own phone, and the two exchanged information. 
"There." he said, handing her phone back to her after writing his contact info in it. "If you need anything, you can let me know. Or just…" His demeanor shifted slightly, seeming a bit more timid. "If you wanted to hang out… I don't know."
"I'd like that." Rin said with a warm smile, and she could see his shoulders relax as she said that.
Ikuto couldn't help but smile softly at her. "I'll hopefully see you soon then. Take care of yourself, okay?" 
"I… I will." she responded, and Ikuto then turned to leave.
"Also," he said, stopping in the doorway. "You can call me Ikuto, if you'd like."
"Okay, Ikuto-san." she said softly with a smile, and she could see a small smile on his lips as well as he nodded politely before turning and walking out the door.
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maerenee930 · 2 years
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hello, friends 😊 how is everyone doing?
it’s been a minute since i’ve checked in with everyone and wanted to see how you all are? i’m genuinely asking, btw. so like if you feel comfortable enough to reply (i don’t want anyone doing anything they aren’t comfortable with or anything they don’t want to do 🖤), please do! i would love to talk and catch up with you! or if you’d rather talk privately, please know you can always dm me! 💙
also, i wanted to let you know that i love you so much and am so thankful you are here! please make sure to drink some water if you haven’t today (or haven’t in a bit), please make sure you eat (if you haven’t eaten in a while and aren’t that hungry, please have something small), if you take medication and haven’t yet, please take it and please make sure to do something that’s just for you and that makes you smile and that makes you truly happy 💙☺️ remember you are loved and deserve all the happiness in the world and i’m always here for you if you ever need me!
seriously though, i don’t care if we don’t talk much or at all. if you feel comfortable enough and you need someone to talk to or to listen, for real, let me know. please dm me and i am here for you ❤️💙🫂 i don’t ever want anyone to feel like they have to go through anything alone. you wouldn’t be bothering me and even if it feels a little awkward because we don’t really talk, please try to do it anyway because you deserve to have someone be there for you when you need them.
also, even if you wanna dm to just talk to me about the most random thing(s), do it! i love talking about the most random things and would love to talk with you!
or if you wanna share something that made you happy or something exciting that’s going on and you need someone to talk to about it, message me! i’ll celebrate with you and be genuinely excited for you!
or if you need a distraction for a bit because things are just feeling rough or like they’re too much to deal with, i’m always here 💖
i love you, i hope you’re doing well, that your day is going well and i’m sending you the biggest/warmest and most loving of hugs 🫂😘
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