#so it’s like ah fuck I’ve got a whole life ahead of me what do I do with that
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Thank you for all the kind comments! I always get a little bit existential when I can’t sleep but it genuinely made me feel a lot better to see what you all had to say.
There’s this sense of “falling behind” that haunts me—in my second year of college and I’ve never kissed anyone, I’m shy and I haven’t found my people yet, I don’t go to parties or do any of the fun things that college is “about.”
I really needed the reminder that it’s NORMAL to not have things figured out. I’m 20 years old that’s young!! That’s still in the beginning stages of my life. Sometimes I feel like my life is already over so it’s nice to be reminded that life goes on. Older people take years to find their place in the world—and that’s okay! Really this sense of a ticking clock is absolutely ridiculous. I have all of adulthood to look forward to, how the FUCK could I already be “falling behind.”
Finally, to those of you who are in similar situations, thank you. It helps to know I’m not alone. We’re gonna get through this. It’s gonna suck and it’ll take work but at the end of the day we’re gonna get through this. Anyways early adulthood SUCKS! My god. Who on earth has things figured out when they’re just barely an adult?? Anyways love you all. We’re going through this together and, goddamn, we are gonna get through it.
#personal#gonna get dark for a sec but tbh I didn’t think I’d live this long??#so it’s like ah fuck I’ve got a whole life ahead of me what do I do with that#sometimes it feels like it’s already over and I’m like no that’s the 16 year old who thought her life was irrevocably broken#that’s not me!!#things will get better it just takes time and some effort#lea talks
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Could you write a fic with a writer who’s just found out that the guy she’s seeing really isn’t what she thought he was and she’s feeling really down about it/him and Jamie comforts her?
hope this is what you were looking for😊 thanks for the ask!!
we could be so good
It’s a sad drive from the restaurant to Jamie’s house. You walk straight in and crash on the couch.
“That bad, huh?” Jamie says.
You nod. “We’ve been going out for over a month, and it’s like a switch flipped. He’s a complete prick.”
Jamie awkwardly pats your head. “I’m sorry love.”
“How could I be so- so- blind?” you continue. “I should’ve known he was too good to be true. I fucking hate dating and I never want to fucking do it again.”
“You’ve been with a lot of shit blokes,” Jamie muses. You’re both silent, thinking back on all the guys you’ve dated over the past eight years.
He snaps his fingers. “Ronald Spencer.”
You sigh. “Ah yes. Ronald Spencer. The absolute love of my life. Fuckin’ shame we met so early in life.”
Jamie shrugs. “You were pretty mature for a pair of five year olds. ‘Course, I’d already had two girlfriends at that point, so I was way ahead of you.”
You wrinkle your forehead. “Okay, you were eight. You had three years on us and he broke up with me because you scared him away.”
“It’s my job to take care of you, and I think you could’ve done better. Speaking of-” Jamie gets up off the couch. “You want a snack?”
“Ooh, yes please.” You follow Jamie to the kitchen and hop up on the counter. He rummages through his cupboard and pulls out two bags of crisps and a chocolate bar.
“Told Roy these were for you so he wouldn’t throw them away,” he tells you. “Fucking mental, that one. Went through me whole house and got rid of so much shit.”
Jamie hands you the prawn cocktail chips, keeping cheddar for himself. “Don’t tell Coach.”
You zip your lips as he sits on the counter next to you.
“Oi.” He knocks his shoulder against yours. “Forget about that fucking nutter, yeah? You can do better.”
You shrug and say, “Don’t really think so at this point. Maybe I’ll just move back to Manchester.”
Jamie whips his head around to look at you. “Fuck. No. This house is too fucking big and too fucking quiet. Plus, I save so much money on house sitters.”
“Like you need to save money,” you snort.
“I’m serious,” Jamie insists. “The fuck would I do all alone here?”
You give him a strange look. “Um, I don’t know, bring a girl ‘round? Go out at night instead of watching telly with me? Not listen to me complain about shit dates?”
“Or,” he suggests, “I could not do any of that and we could go on un-shit dates together.”
You laugh. “Un-shit? That’s the best you could come up with? Wait- what?”
Jamie’s words finally register.
It’s silent except for the crinkle of the chocolate wrapper. Jamie hands you half and you snap it into smaller pieces.
“Yeah, I mean, might as well shoot my shot now, right? Not to be fucking weird, but I’ve had a crush on you for ages. Since we were kids. Like I said, didn’t want to make it weird ‘cause, like, we live together. Didn’t want things to be awkward. Or for you to fucking move back home. I mean c’mon love, with your mum? Wouldn’t do that to you.”
You smile. “Okay.”
“Okay?” Jamie parrots.
“Yeah, okay. I guess- I think I always figured we’d end up here. I liked you since I was six and you kicked a football through the window, then picked all those flowers to apologize. I kept every article that was ever written about you. I dunno, I thought either we’d figure it out in our thirties or maybe just be weirdly platonic for the rest of our lives.”
Jamie cocks his head. “That’s weirdly specific.”
You shrug. “Am I wrong?”
You’re not.
Jamie says, “So…��� as he swings his legs.
You turn to look at him. “Yes?”
“Can we like, kiss? Because I’ve been thinking about it for fucking years.”
“My breath smells like crisps,” you warn.
“Don’t care,” Jamie replies as he hops down from the counter. He pulls your legs to hook around his waist as he tilts your chin downward.
“Is it too early to say I love you?” he murmurs.
You wrap your arms around his neck and smile. “I think it’s the perfect time.”
#jamie tartt x reader#jamie tartt fanfiction#jamie tartt imagine#jamie tartt x y/n#jamie tartt x you#jamie tartt#ted lasso
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Snucius Being A Perfect Match — A gift for my wifey @halfblood-princes-crown
GUYS!!!!!!! It’s the love of my life aka @halfblood-princes-crown’s birthday today! As my birthday gift to him, and because I know Snucius is his OTP, this is a “Snucius + Narcissa (with a side of Bellatrix and Regulus) being a chaotic duo/trio” post <3
Enjoy:
******
Snape: Petition to remove the ‘d’ from Wednesday
Lucius: Wednesay
Snape: Not what I had in mind, but I’m flexible
******
Snape: Why are you on the floor?
Lucius: I’m depressed.
Lucius: Also I was stabbed, can you get Narcissa, please?
******
Lucius: I love you guys, you’re the best thing that’s happened to me.
Snape: We’re the best thing that’s ever happened to you?
Lucius: Yes!
Narcissa: I’m starting to feel a little sorry for you.
******
Bellatrix: *Screams*
Narcissa: *Screams louder to establish dominance*
Lucius: Should we do something?
Snape: No, I want to see who wins.
******
Snape: How have none of you people hear what I just said?
Lucius: I’ve been zoned out for the past two and a half hours.
Narcissa: I got distracted about halfway through.
Bellatrix: Ignoring you was a conscious decision.
******
Bellatrix: I just ended a four year relationship.
Narcissa: Oh, I’m so sorry. Are you okay?
Bellatrix: Hm? Oh yes, I’m fine. It wasn’t my relationship.
*Snape and Lucius fighting from across the room*
******
Snape: There is no future. There is no past. Do you see? Time is simultaneous — an intricately structured jewel that humans insist on viewing one edge at a time, when the whole design is visible in every facet.
Lucius:
Narcissa:
Regulus:
Bellatrix:
Rosier:
Everyone Else At Snape’s Surprise Birthday Party:
Lucius: Severus… all I asked was if you wanted to cut your birthday cake first.
******
Snape: What did you guys get in your yearbook?
Lucius: ‘Prettiest Smile’
Narcissa: ‘Nicest Personality’
Bellatrix: ‘Most likely to start a bar fight’
Regulus: ‘Least likely to start a bar fight, but most likely to win one’
******
Lucius: If there’s going to be a big dramatic scene, wait until I get back.
Snape: Of course, Lucius. I cannot flip this table by myself.
******
Snape: I think I’m having a mid-life crisis.
Lucius: You’re 19 years old
Snape: I MIGHT DIE AT LIKE 38
******
Lucius: You love me, right, Severus?
Snape: Normally, I’d answer yes without hesitation, but I feel like this is going somewhere and I don’t like it.
******
Snape: Lucius and I have the kind of easy chemistry where we finish each other’s-
Lucius: -sentences.
Snape: Do not interrupt me.
******
Lucius: So that’s my plan.
Snape: Are you alright with constructive criticism? I don’t want to sound mean.
Lucius: No, go ahead, I want to hear it.
Snape: It fucking sucks.
Lucius: First of all, that’s not constructive criticism.
******
Lucius: Severus, I only ever see you awake, do you ever take a nap or stop running?
Snape: Oh, I’m always running
Snape: The question is… (*dramatic Movie!Snape pause*) from what.
******
Snape: I’m a reverse necromancer.
Lucius: Isn’t that just killing people?
Snape: Ah yes, technicality.
******
Lucius: Severus, love, it’s your turn to wash dishes.
Snape: I’LL WASH THE WALLS RED WITH YOUR BLOOD.
Lucius: Fine, but before that, wash the dishes, also use soap this time?
******
Lucius: You know, Narcissa and I are starting to regret showing you how that blender works.
Snape, drinking toast: Why do you say that?
******
Lucius: Okay, help me please!
Snape: I have two words for you
Lucius: I bet they won’t be helpful.
Snape: Your problem.
Lucius: I was right
******
Lucius: Aw Severus! Look at you, getting all romantic with these candles!
Snape: Who said anything about being romantic?
Snape: Maybe I’m going to sacrifice you.
******
Lucius: You know, Severus, I can never tell if you’re insulting me or flirting with me.
Snape: If it makes you feel any better, me neither.
******
Narcissa: This is a catastrophe! The printer messed up the invitation! It was supposed to say “Lucius’s birthday!”
Snape: What does it say instead?
Narcissa: Lucius’s bi.
Snape:
Snape: Still works.
******
Lucius: *pretends to stretch*
Lucius: *puts arm around Snape’s shoulder*
Snape:
Snape: *pretends to stretch*
Snape: *smacks Lucius in the face*
******
Snape: Are you seeing someone?
Lucius, blushing: No, why?
Snape: I don’t know, I simply thought that perhaps you would benefit from seeing a therapist or something.
******
Snape: So, Lucius sent me an owl saying “your adorable” and I sent him one back saying “no, YOU’RE adorable.”
Narcissa: And?
Snape: And now we’re dating.
Narcissa:
Snape: We’ve been on six dates thus far and I have yet to tell him I was merely correcting a spelling mistake but I kind of like him so...
******
Narcissa to Lucius and Snape: This is such a bad idea.
Snape: Then why are you coming along?
Narcissa: One of us needs to be able to talk the aurors out of arresting us when this inevitably goes wrong.
#also one of these quotes is a disguised sad one#i’ll give a cookie to whoever guesses it right 🍪#snucius#also i know that some of these are obvs out of character/not in touch with canon#but this is a wholesome joke post so just enjoy 😙#sephtoony#sephtoony fam#severus snape#lucius malfoy#bellatrix lestrange#narcissa malfoy#pro snape#pro severus snape#snape#harry potter#hp#shitpost
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Steady Heart
Chapter 11: Meet Me in the Morning
* Pairing: Slow-burn Kayce Dutton x OFC Stella Daniels
* Rating: M? (Still figuring out the rating system) (might eventually be M anyhow)
* Warnings: language, death, shooting a bear
* Word count: 3,305ish
I would love to give credits to @dameronscopilot and @deanscroissant for being sounding boards for me during this whole process, giving outsider insight, being cheerleaders, and allowing me to screech at them about things that have happened during the writing process. I seriously couldn't have gotten this far without y'all
Author's note: I hope everyone is enjoying so far! I hope you love this chapter as well!
Stella sat quietly with Tate, waiting for him to be able to see his mom. The doctors were explaining things to the family about Monica’s prognosis and the outlook of her motor function. Tate would go in and visit afterward.
Motion at the corner of the hallway grabbed her attention. John came around the bend only to be stopped short at the sight of his grandson and ranch hand sitting there. His heart stopped and he struggled to catch his breath. “Tate? Stella? What are you doing here?”
“I’m babysitting until they’re ready for Tate here to visit his mom.”
Tate objected. “Hey I’m not a baby!”
Stella and John shared a laugh. “Okay, I’m sitting with Tate until they’re ready for him.” She leaned toward the boy, “was that better?”
Tate nodded. “Yes. I like that a lot more.”
John smirked as he watched the scene play out in front of him.
Stella gave her attention to her boss. “What’re you doing here, sir?”
“Just a check up for that previous subject you heard about.”
She raised a suspicious eyebrow. A feeling familiar to her from 15 years prior clenched in her stomach. It made her feel like she was 11 years old sitting in the hospital waiting for Ryan to show up. “Everything good?”
“Yeah. I was given an A plus on my record. I’m gonna go in and see what’s going on.”
She gave her boss a nonchalant salute and relaxed back in her chair. Tate started to fidget next to her. “What’s going on, bud?”
“I wanna see my mom.”
“We’ll be able to go in soon, okay? Gotta wait for the go ahead.” Her phone buzzed in her pocket.
Where the fuck are you
A heavy sigh escaped her lips at the angry text from Rip. The hand with her phone dropped into her lap. She placed her glasses on top of her head and pinched the bridge of her nose. She was tired of looking at things in focus.
“Aunt Stella? Are you okay?”
“Yeah, buddy. Just annoyed.”
“What happened?”
“Ah, just someone being a jerk. That’s all.”
“You want me to take care of ‘em?”
Stella laughed. “No it’s okay. I can handle even the worst of bullies. Thank you though.”
The door opened next to them. Kayce poked his head out and called for his son to come into the room. He glanced back out at Stella, still leaning on the door, and could see the tension rolling through her. Her glasses on top of her head gave it away. “Hey Stell, you good?”
She stood and took a few steps over to Kayce. She held out her phone with the text from Rip ready to display. “I was supposed to be there early this morning. It’s all hands on deck to find that bear.”
Kayce’s face dropped. “Why didn’t you tell me? I would’ve been fine with Tate here.”
“Kayce you know me. I have a penchant for helping people. And I’m currently aggravated at the other option. So fuck him.”
He straightened himself and stepped out into the hallway. “Listen, I’ve caused enough hell for you the last few days. You go. I’m gonna send Tate home with my dad anyhow. It’ll make things easier to take care of Monica the first couple days.”
“What’s the outlook by the way?”
“Not exactly great, but not life threatening anymore. Just gonna be a long road from here.”
“You guys got this, I believe in you.” She looked into the room and locked eyes with Monica. “I’m gonna go say hi to her and then I’ll head out to my doom.”
Stella let a soft smile fall into place when she walked across the threshold. “Hey you.” Monica gave a side smile back.
“Thank you for helping Kayce with Tate. And for making sure he brushed his teeth.”
Stella looked at Tate jokingly. “You ratted me out!”
“Oh I’ve heard all about it in the last five minutes.” Monica chuckled weakly.
Both of the grandfathers in the room watched the women silently joke and felt a sense of peace. Kayce smiled softly from the door.
“Well, I just wanted to tell you that I’m sure you’re gonna get better in no time, and that whatever help you guys need, don’t hesitate to ask me. I’m here for whatever y’all need.”
“Thank you, Stella. Really.”
“Of course miss ma’am. You get better now, ya hear?” Monica nodded in response. Stella turned to face the men. “Now I’ve got an appointment with a foreman and a bear. Both angry, but in different ways.”
She chuckled at their faces and made her way out. She almost got to the corner of the hallway before she heard Kayce shout be careful. Smiling over her shoulder Stella shouted back, “Never cowboy!”
Her shoulders tensed while she put her car in park. Looking through her windshield, she witnessed Rip stomp a trail to her. ‘Get ready for the bitching now.’ Her eyes rolled and she got out of the car with a huff leaving everything in there.
“Where the fuck have you been?! I told you early this morning! It’s almost noon!”
“Rip,” she let out a harsh huff, "I had something important that needed to be taken care of.”
“Oh really? And what was so important that you had to fall back on your word? I told you all hands on deck.”
“You know, I really don’t have to tell you. Just because you’re my boss, doesn’t mean my personal life is your business.”
“When it interferes with your performance, it is my business.”
“Oh go tell it on the mountain somewhere else.” Stella rolled her eyes and walked to the barn to get Abigail.
Rip watched her stalk away to the barn. His blood pressure rose to the stratosphere. This girl was giving him a hell of a time and was being too stubborn to learn. Lloyd chuckled from his left.
“She’s sure giving you one hell of a run for your money, ain’t she?”
“She’s being hardheaded and refuses to acknowledge the problem. She won’t listen, Lloyd.”
Lloyd’s bushy eyebrows pulled together in a frown. “What brought all this on?”
Rip looked around to make sure no one was within earshot. “I’m getting tired of burying Kayce’s secrets, and I don’t want her to end up being one of the secrets I have to put in the ground.”
Lloyd’s face hardened. “You and I both know that boy would sacrifice himself if it meant she came out safe. He wouldn’t let anything happen to her.”
“Can we be so sure? He’s a changed man now, and isn’t just the wild eyed boy we remember him as.”
“I’m sure he wouldn’t let any harm come to her. If anything, there would be more to bury from him stopping them.”
Rip remained silent and still, thinking. He knew that Stella and Kayce had become a package deal at this point, but he just wanted what was best for her. He didn’t want Kayce to be the reason her back broke from carrying the weight of troubles he brought on.
“I can see the wheels spinning. You know you can’t be aggressive with trying to get her to understand. She bucks back twice as hard.” Rip knew that. Everyone knew that. “Maybe your temper that she’s not listening is getting the better of you?” Lloyd suggested. “I think you two are more similar than either of you would like to admit.”
He nodded at Lloyd and looked at the ground. Stella had spent plenty of time around him in her very impressionable teenage years. It would make sense that she had picked up some of his mannerisms. “Which makes sense for why she’s responding the way she is.”
“Why's that?”
“Because I would do the same thing.” Rip admitted.
Lloyd smirked under his mustache. Rip would learn one of these days. He was getting closer. Lloyd hoped that the foreman and the woman of the gang could iron out the wrinkles soon.
When Stella crossed the threshold Abigail was standing in the cross ties. Ryan moved around the mare fixing her saddle the way Stella always had it set. Stella cleared her throat.
Her brother whipped his head to where she was standing with her arms crossed. He admitted quickly, “we fucked up this morning.”
“So did I. He’s double pissed then.” She rolled her eyes and took a few strides forward grabbing Abigail’s reins and unhooked her from the cross ties. Stella felt Ryan’s presence come up behind her. She looked over her shoulder at him and asked, “so what did y’all do?”
“We all forgot a rifle, Jimmy’s horse spooked and he almost got eaten, Walker and I had to rope the bear and run it off.”
Her eyes widened. “Jesus Christ. Well he’s making me go with him now. So wish me luck.” Rip bellowed her name from outside the barn. “I’m gonna need it.” Ryan squeezed her shoulder. She gracefully stepped into her saddle. As she ascended she felt her brother’s hand immediately grab her foot like when she was younger to help her hike it over. She smiled fondly at the muscle memory. Stella gently nudged her hips forward causing Abigail to walk out the door.
Stella ducked her head when they went through the door. It was a large barn door, it was plenty high enough. She could never break the habit from the smaller door at one of the first ranches she and Ryan had been at. That ranch had been a much smaller operation than the Dutton legacy.
Rip waited on Stella up on his gelding. Oddly patient. Something had changed in his demeanor and it gave Stella whiplash. He asked, “ready to go?”
Her face scrunched and she pulled her head back, suspicious. “Uh, yeah. You got the rifle?”
“You heard, huh?”
“Yeah. Glad it didn’t turn out worse. I’ve got a rope and my knife. You want me to get my pistol from my car?”
“Nah I’ve got the rifle. It’s all we’ll need.”
“Let’s go then.” She nudged Abigail into motion.
“Be careful Stella!” She heard Ryan yell at her.
She smirked over her shoulder for the second time that day. “Never Ry!”
Both Rip and Stella had been silent for 30 minutes. It would take a good chunk of time to get out to the far pasture Walker had run it off in. Rip rode ahead of her, but never far enough to be out of hearing distance. Stella knew he hoped to run into the bear first to keep her away from it.
“So,” she called out and Rip slowed his gelding to a walk for her to catch up. “We’re caught up in another bear problem. Seems to be a theme here.”
“Yeah, one we gotta break after today.” His answer was short. He had to remember that he was still upset with her.
Stella bit her bottom lip and took the leap. “I’m sorry.” She could feel his gaze on her. She couldn’t bring herself to look at him. “I just don’t understand why you’re so angry about a friendship that’s been over half my life at this point.”
“It’s not the friendship I’m worried about, Stella. It’s your safety. Kayce has been different since he came back from the service. Unhinged almost.”
“But here’s the thing Rip… he’s always been a little unhinged. Monica and myself are the ones that help ground him.”
“But it’s not your responsibility to ground him.”
Stella broke and chanced to look at him. Her shoulders dropped. “I know it’s not, but I’m not gonna sit by and watch someone I care about destroy themselves.” They were coming up on a cliff. She gave Abigail direction to stop. “You know me. I’m a helper. And I’d follow him to hell and back.”
“Sometimes to a fault, Stella-belle. And I wish he would stop going there with you following.”
The trees became silent. It was like every noise around them stopped. It weighed heavily on Stella’s shoulders and made the air thick and hard to breathe. Her forehead crinkled in uncertainty. Looking to Rip for silent direction, eyes wide with concern. Typically when the forest went silent, it was time to leave. That’s what everyone in the bunkhouse had taught her growing up. It meant your invitation had been revoked and something weird or dangerous was about to happen.
Rip hopped down off his gelding and quickly tied him to a tree. Pulling out the rifle, he walked forward. His head tracked back and forth on a swivel, keeping an eye out in almost every direction. Stella wasn’t about to get off of her mode of fast transportation. Abigail was solid through nearly everything, but Stella didn’t want to take the chance of losing her way out if the bear came around and decided to get funky. Stella slowly walked Abigail behind Rip. Alarmed at every noise that broke the eerie dead air.
A cracking branch caught their attention. They looked to the left and the bear they were looking for ran through some skinny trees growling. It knew they were there and it was letting them know it wasn’t happy about it. Rip pulled up the rifle to aim at the rogue bear. Stella made Abigail stand. It felt like the mare was dancing on her tiptoes. The bear ran farther to the right and let out another warning growl as it trotted along.
Abigail and Stella tracked the bear, but both whipped their heads in the direction of the cliff. Rip started to charge after the bear. “Wait! Shh!” Rip stopped short at her warning. There were noises coming from over the side. Stella and Rip locked eyes, worry took over them both. In motion that looked like a choreographed dance Stella swung down off of her horse, sure to keep the reins tight in her grasp.
They rushed up the hill and around the corner to the cliff side searching for where the commotion of mumbling voices was coming from. Stella let Abigail stand ground tied and they came to the cliff's edge and saw a couple hanging onto the side of the cliff face for dear life.
“You’ve gotta be fuckin’ kidding me.” Rip let out an exasperated sigh. “Stella, get your rope!” He ordered.
She took off to Abigail. In the background she could hear Rip shouting directions to the couple and asking questions to keep them distracted. She took the loose end of her lasso and tied it to Abigail’s saddle horn tight.
“Stella, tie it and bring the other end over here!”
“Already on it!” She ran back over to Rip and carefully leaned over the edge of the cliff face. Abigail followed, close enough so the rope would reach the couple, but a good distance away from the edge.
“Okay okay! Look at me! Calmly wrap this around you one at a time!” She started to lower the rope. When it reached them, they started to scramble to get it wrapped around both of them.
“No no one at a time!” Rip hollered. The woman slipped and grabbed onto her partner’s legs. She was struggling to hold on.
Stella could hear Abigail struggling in the background to hold the weight of both people.
Rip yelled again. “That’s too heavy! We can’t pull both of you up at the same time! Explain to him we can’t fuckin’ lift both of you!”
The couple screamed and flailed around. Within seconds they witnessed the woman lose her grip and fall to her death. Stella screamed. “No!” The man looked up at her and Rip. He sobbed, destroyed at losing his loved one. Stella flung the rope toward him. “Please put this under your arms.” She pleaded with him, motioning what she wanted him to do.
“Hey! Grab this with both hands!” Rip yelled. The man continued to sob and looked below him to the forest floor. Rip called out again. “Listen to me! Grab it with both hands!”
The man took one last look at the pair and let go. Stella’s stomach dropped. She and Rip fell back against the ground. Her mouth opened in shock and disbelief. There was a jerk from the back of her jacket and she flew back from the cliff face and landed against the tree next to her.
“I don’t need you to fall either, Jesus!” Rip exclaimed.
“Fuck what do we do?” Stella asked breathlessly.
A frighteningly close bellow came from behind them. Abigail whinnied and squealed before she bolted. To their dismay, the bear had found them with all the noise. The bear stomped a few times and then charged. Stella scrambled backward past the tree and the rifle. She passed it off to Rip’s searching hand. He wasn’t taking his eyes off that bear. Rip grabbed the rifle with lightning speed, took a knee and let a shot ring out; hitting the bear square in the forehead. Their huffing and puffing loud the alarming hush that fell over the forest.
“What do we do?” Stella asked in a high pitch. Her heart pounded in her chest so hard she thought it would fly out.
They found their horses banded together not too far from where they had left Rip’s bay. They got on and galloped back to the ranch. They came through the main gate from the opening to the pastures and ground to a halt by the round pen. Rip dismounted and looked up at Stella as he handed her his reins.
“You stay here. I gotta make a couple calls. Don’t say anything to anyone.” He pulled out his phone and called Jamie first. He didn’t pick up, but Rip left him a voicemail. He proceeded to make his way to the barn leaving Stella there in silent fear.
Once he was in the barn he called John, who also didn’t pick up. Another voicemail would have to suffice. “Sorry to bother you again sir, but we need the sheriff out here asap. So when you get this, give me a call will you?” He hung up and went to the bunkhouse.
It sounded lively inside. Walker could be heard strumming and singing, and the other men of the house talked animatedly to each other. When he crossed into the house, he saw Tate sitting at the table and Beth in a chair at the end.
She turned and looked over her shoulder pleased to see him. “Looks like you brought the music festival to me!”
He stared at her, conflicted. Ryan noticed his sister wasn’t with him and he stood from the back of the room.
Ryan took in the distraught look on Rip’s usually emotionless face. His stomach sank. “Where’s Stella? Is she okay?”
“Everything is fine Ryan. Your sister included. Go back to what y’all were doing. I need to borrow her for a little bit longer.” Rip directed and immediately turned on his heel to leave.
Stella jumped at every noise the ranch made, thinking that someone was coming up on her. She wasn’t sure how the events of today were going to unfold, and she really wasn’t enjoying being stuck in this position to find out.
Rip came from around a different corner and it startled her. Her hand flew to her chest. “My god, I can’t stop jumping.”
“Everything will be okay Stella, but I need you to stay with me and stay calm. We’re gonna get this figured out.” He reached out for his reins. “C’mon. Let’s get these horses put up and come with me to the lodge. You’ll be staying here tonight.”
She slipped down off of Abigail and followed in his shadow to the barn.
#yellowstone#kayce dutton#yellowstonetv#luke grimes#ian bohen#ryan#kayce dutton fan fiction#yellowstone fanfic#yellowstone fanfiction#kayce dutton fanfic#rip wheeler
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DIABOLIK LOVERS LOST EDEN Imajin Webshop Tokuten Drama CD “Goldfish Paradise: The Disaster of the Magic Goldfish” Part 2
Original title: ゴールドフィッシュパラダイス★魔金魚の災い」後篇
Source: Diabolik Lovers LOST EDEN Imajin Webshop Tokuten Drama CD
Audio: Here
Seiyuu: Hirakawa Daisuke, Tatsuhisa Suzuki & Tomoaki Maeno
Translator’s note: I honestly felt so bad for Yuma throughout most of this CD. The poor guy was so serious and genuine about the competition, but he’s over there with barely any fish biting while the two guys just fucking around are getting one after the other. Sometimes it’d be like that in life though. The Magic Goldfish showing up was so random though, but tokuten CDs are known for being quite chaotic and unpredictable, so I can’t complain.
→ LIKE MY TRANSLATIONS? SUPPORT ME ON KO-FI!
*Plop*
Laito: Aha~ Seems like the strawberry flavored ones are more effective than the lemon ones. They just keep on coming!
Kino: Honestly, fishing is proving to be quite the effective strategy to vent off any pent-up stress.
Laito: Kino-kun! How many do you have so far?
Kino: Good question. I haven’t been counting, but I’m pretty sure I’ve got at least more than twenty right now. At this rate, I’ll easily win this thing. …So, how many has Mr. Big Talk caught so far~?
Yuma: Only…three.
Laito: Eeh~? I can’t believe you’ve only caught three when a whole thirty minutes has passed already~
Yuma: Shut up! …Fuck! At this rate, these fuckers will run away with my prize money! I have to avoid that at all costs…!!
Laito: You say that, but I can’t picture you walking around with any sweets on you, so what will you use as bait?
Yuma: Actually…I do have somethin’ sweet on me…
Laito: Eh? Really?
*Rustle*
Yuma: This thing from the packed lunch Ruki made me take with meー It’s sweet, isn’t it?
Kino: Eh? What’s that? Could it be…warabi mochi? (1)
Laito: Pfftー! Geez, Yuma~ I can’t believe you’ve got warabi mochi in your packed lunch. Talk about lame!
Yuma: S-Shut up! Ruki’s been really into traditional Japanese cuisine as of late, includin’ sweets and such as well…It’s not like I’m the one who asked him to put that shit in there!
Kino: I don’t really care about the backstory but…I doubt any fish will want a bite of that. Well, I’ll watch closely as all of your hopes shatter into a million pieces, so go ahead and use it.
Yuma: Fuck off! Run yer mouth all ya want!
*Plop*
Laito: Nfu~ You’re not getting a bite at all.
Kino: I don’t even see any ripples in the water. I guess these fish aren’t particularly fond of sweets.
Yuma: Why…!? Come on, can’t some random-ass miracle happen to me as well!?
Laito: I can’t believe he’s trying to threaten these goldfish…Fufu, how embarrassing.
Kino: Haha! This is painful to watch. Honestly, I feel for the guy.
*Ding ding ding*
Kino: Woah there, seems like now isn’t the time to be distracted by some guy trying to pray to the God of all Goldfish. I suppose it’s time for the final spurt to victory!
Laito: I shall do that too~ Actually, fishing is surprisingly easy, don’t you think?
Yuma: Ya bastards…Ya really think ya can just say whatever ya want, huh? Hah! Just watch me! The true battle starts now!
*Rustle rustle*
Laito: Oh~? What are you going to use as bait next? A rice cake filled with red bean paste, perhaps?
Yuma: Hell nah! I’m bringin’ out the big guns this time! Imma throw in Sugar-chan! This one’s special, straight from the Demon World as well so it should be super effective!
*Plop*
Yuma: Oh come on…Why won’t any of these fuckers bite!?
Laito: You know…Maybe it doesn’t work on regular animals because it’s a product from the Demon World?
Kino: I mean…using a sugar cube as bait is just bad taste, don’t you think?
Yuma: Why didn’t ya stop me then if ya knew that!? I totally wasted it now!!
Kino: Ahー Sorry, my bad. I didn’t think you were that stupid, you wouldn’t even be able to figure out such an obvious thing.
Yuma: Fuck…My Sugar-chan…
*Bubble bubble bubble*
Laito: Huh? I think I saw a shadow in the water just now?
*Bubble bubble bubble*
Kino: I think you’re right. But…It didn’t look tiny like a goldfish…
*SPLASH*
Yuma: O-Oi…What was that huge, black fin just now…? It was two meters long, at least.
Laito: I don’t know but…Since this place is called ‘Goldfish Paradise’, it must be a goldfish as well, right…?
Kino: Haah!? No way there’s a goldfish so ridiculously big! It has to be a mistake of some sort.
*Creaak*
Laito: Hey! Something’s tugging strongly onto Yuma’s rod! Could it be that he has that monstrous Goldfish from earlier on the hook!?
Kino: I’m pretty sure he does. Since it went for the sugar cube from the Demon World…Perhaps it’s a goldfish native to that world as well?
Yuma: Haah!? And what is that monster doin’ inside this run-down-the-mill fishin’ pond!? Ugh…
Laito: Don’t tell me…Could this place be connected to the Demon World somehow? …Anyway, now that you’ve got it on the hook, you better do something about it!
Yuma tries to reel in the goldfish.
Yuma: That’s…easier than said…It’s seriously strong…I’m pretty sure I’ll end up in the water with it if I dare loosen my grip for even a split second…!
Kino: Hah…? I mean, can’t you hurry up and either reel it in or let it pull you in instead. That’ll fix the problem, right?
Yuma: Ugh…What do you mean…let it pull me in…!? We’re talkin’ ‘bout a freakin’ monster over here!
Laito: I doubt one sugar cube is enough to satisfy something of such a size! But if it gobbles you up whole, it might just still its hunger for now!
Yuma: Fuck off…! But seriously, it’s no joke how strong this thing is! Damnit…Oi! Help me out!!
Kino: Haah…?
Yuma: I can’t do this on my own, but if we combine our forces, we might just be able to reel it in! Now quit yappin’ and grab hold of my fishin’ rod!
Laito: Eeh!? Ah, god, guess I have no other choice!
Kino: And why exactly should I get close to this sweaty, smelly guy? I can’t believe this.
*Rustle*
Yuma: ‘Kay, don’t let go now, got it? We’ll pull at the count of three! Three, two…one!!
They start pulling the fish in.
Laito, Yuma & Kino: Ughーー!
*Creaaak*
Yuma: We’ve almost got him! Give it everythin’ you’ve got, fuckers! Aaaahーーー!
*SPLASH*
*Boing*
Yuma: Uwah…What’s this enormous, disgustin’ thing? I guess it’s a creature from the Demon World after all…?
Laito: I think it’s about as big as our entire manor? Also…Its stench is out of this world… (hurls)
Kino: I believe this could be a…a Magic Goldfish like the ones at Rotigenberg.
Yuma: Ya know ‘bout these!?
Kino: They’re infamous in the Demon World for causing disaster. Never heard of them? You’ll often see them at goldfish scooping games at festivals and such. …The only downside to them is that they have a huge appetite, causing them to quickly grow incredibly large.
Laito: Heeh…Well, if they only grow large without much more, I guess we can just let it do its thing?
Yuma: Yeah.
Kino: Ah, right. I forgot to mention but…Its favorite food is humans.
Yuma: Ah…? …Which means… ーー !! This is bad…!!
The fish starts cracking its teeth.
Laito: Uwah…This guy is ready to chow down…What are we going to do about this?
The people in the shop start freaking out.
Yuma: Oi! Doesn’t it have a weakness or somethin’...!?
Kino: Let me think…It’s highly resistant to fire and hitting it from the outside won’t have much effect either.
Yuma: Which means we gotta hit from the inside, huh? …Oi, Mr. Fedora! Go and get yerself swallowed by it!
Laito: Eh!? Why me!? No way! Besides, I’m not a human, so it won’t eat me, will it?
Kino: Then why not randomly pick one of those humans running around over there to feed it?
Yuma: You can’t do that! The competition will get canceled!
Laito: Eh!? You still haven’t given up on taking that prize money home!?
Yuma: ‘Course not! Not only the prize money either, but the 10 kg of salt given as a bonus prize will be mine as well!
Kino: Ah. …That’s it!
Laito: Eh?
Kino: I’m pretty sure…salt is the Magic Goldfish’ greatest enemy…? I’ve heard that if you sprinkle it on top, it’ll shrink down just like a sea slug does.
Laito: Then we can just use the salt over there, right? Well then, Yuma…You’re our man when it comes to physical work!
Yuma: …No.
Laito: Eh?
Yuma: I refuse to give up the prize! That salt is mine!!
*Wriggle wriggle*
*Thud thud*
Laito: Uwah! Could it be…Is it reacting to the word ‘salt’...!?
*THUD*
Yuma: Uwah! Hey! Don’t run away towards the prize money! …Ah, fine!! I really want that salt but I guess I’ve got no other choice, I’ll do it!!
Yuma runs up to the salt.
Yuma: Aaaaah…!!
*Rustle*
Yuma: Take this…!!
Yuma sprinkles the salt on top of the giant goldfish.
*Woosh*
Laito: Wow! Amazing! It shrunk in the blink of an eye!
Kino: Haah…My amazing memory saved lives this time.
Yuma: But the competition is completely ruined…With everythin’ thrown ‘round, we can’t even tell who caught how many goldfish…Ahー …Which means, just fuck it, right?
Laito: Eh? What do you mean?
Yuma: I’ll be claimin’ the prize money in return for takin’ care of the Magic Goldfish. See ya!
Yuma runs off.
Kino: Hah!? Excuse me!? How am I supposed to pay for my microtransactions then!?
Kino chases after him.
*Wriggle wriggle*
Laito: Ahー Oh well, I guess this helped me kill some time. Besides, it could be quite interesting to take this Magic Goldfish home and let it free in the bathtub. …Nfu~ With that settled, I better head home right away!
ーー THE END ーー
#diabolik lovers#dialovers#laito sakamaki#yuma mukami#kino#diabolik lovers translation#diabolik lovers drama cd#drama cd
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cuz I’m curious and these are questions I like asking to get to know people better :3 so here ya go ^^
1. What got you into doing some of your favorite hobbies? Did you just think you were good and start doing it? Or was it something you were told you should try?
2. What are some of your favorite things?(food, colors, characters, smells, etc.)
3. what’s your favorite video game? Or are they not your thing? do you recommend people playing it?
4. Have you ever listened to a vocaloid song?(Project Sekai/Hatsune Miku colorful stage)
5. Thoughts on Renee Rapp and Bebe Wood? Or just the new Mean Girls in general(this is VITAL)
6. Do you like musicals at all? If so, which is one of your favorites? And please share the soundtrack
7. Who was your first childhood crush?
8. If you’re queer, who was your gay awakening?(ik you are but like😭)
UH YEAH- HOPE YOU ENJOYED MY QUESTIONS :D
omg omg omg omg
1. if we’re talking about writing then i guess when i was little i wanted to write down all of the dialogue of some of mlp episodes but my mom said no😭😭 and i did throw a whole tantrum then and she was like “child get over yourself” and i was all putty and decided screw you people, i’ll do it myself >:[ (spoiler ahead: i didn’t) and then after some years i guess i watched some series and me and my friend made up a world there and i wanted to write down some scenes with me so i literally wrote my own fanfiction then?? (i literally don’t remember what was happening to writing in my life between the ages like 8-13💀)(i mean i remember i was writing a silly story once and planning a book but like??? when exactly??)
and as for writing i literally came out of the womb with a marker in my hand so i was doing it for as long as i remember and i always loved mlp so it started there and well… here we are
2. oh my, my favourites? my favourite colors are defo: red, bottle green and purple but like… a deep one, and a hot pink lately. my fav food is just pasta. i don’t care how or with what, PASTA!! my favourite flower is an orichid:) my favourite characters oh my: fizzarolli (defo), violet from ahs, monica from friends, twilight from mlp, narcissa from harry potter, lady lesso from sfgae, catwoman/poison ivy/harley from dc (still can’t decide on one) and batman, peggy from marvel, aubrey from pitch perfect, celia from tshoev, and darcy from written in the starts:) (there’s a lot more but these are the few from the top of my head)
3. I LOVE VIDEO GAMES THEY WERE MY SPECIAL INTEREST AS A CHILD!! right now my favourite must be the batman i’m currently playing (i have no idea what is that game called) and probably minecraft and little big planet
4. i have not! or i don’t think i have at least, must check it out:)
5. RENEE RAPP>>>> i must still watch the new means girls so bear with me, but i want to watch it in cinema and it just came out in my country so i need to get my friends to go with me
6. I FUCKING LOVE MUSICALS I LIVE FOR THEM!!! my two favourites are mamma mia and pitch perfect (and a special place for sweeney todd) JUST UGH ABBA AND A MOVIE??? CMON!!! AND PITCH PERFECT HAS THIS OERFECT PERFOMANCES LIKE UGHHHH
7. rose from titanic. i said what i said. it was the first movie with people i’ve ever watched and the first lady my brain went “i want to be like her she’s so pretty:)” (you didn’t want to be like her camila, you wanted to be WITH her)
8. oh god good question. i think the person i accepted myself with my sexuality was cheryl from riverdale (when i thought i was bi and then omni and all of those different things) and then robin from stranger things, they both have a special place in my heart. but like just a gay awakening i must also it was also rose? it’s just the kate winslet effect
I LOVED THEM!!!>:]
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ARB Birthday Special: Makina Setsukura
~ September 1st ~
“Lost is a lovely place to find yourself.”
Login Lines
“Happy Birthday to myself and everyone else celebrating their birthday today. What a time to be alive, am I right?”
“Part of me is excited to eventually become an adult with all the adulty perks. But at the same time, I don’t feel like I’m ready to grow up… so while I still can, I just wanna feel like I’m alive with the people I care about the most.”
Voice Lines
“Hellooo. A whole fucking year’s passed, isn’t that wild? It really just zoomed on by. I’ll say it again and again, but it’s shocking how much time’s passed. Like, slow down… please? I want time to just slow down.”
“I think my viewers left presents and fan mail in my P.O. Box. I planned for a big birthday stream for the majority of the day, just to spend some fun time with chat and thank them for the gifts. We’ll look through all the cute fanart on social media, play some games together, and I’ll have a couple of collabs with some streamer friends, too. Aaaaand I’ve got some fun surprises for chat, too.”
“Oh, Anika… thank you… Yeah, we couldn’t celebrate last year… ‘cuz of… Right… different… What the… stop sounding so cheesy… Urgh, today’s not the day for me to cry, dammit, I have makeup on…”
“You got me a present? Can I see it now? Isn’t this one of those ccomo mini fridges? It’s the brown bear fridge… I mean it’s really cute… and it’s got a lot of storage space… It’ll be good when I stream so I don’t have to leave my room to get snacks… What the fuck, why was that so backhanded… Ah shut up… and thanks…”
“Oh hey, Shian… thanks. Oh… was that two years ago? Oh yeah, it was… It felt like yesterday but it also felt like so long ago. I can’t thank you enough… really… Ah, shit, I didn’t want you to hear that… Ugh… thanks…”
“A pink…handheld carousel…? With pink bunnies? It’s a projector? How… Oh, ok, I see how it works now. That’s cool. And it’s really cute. A gift for kids? … I can’t even be mad about that…”
Anika Lines
“Hey, Happy Birthday, kiddo! This is my first celebrating your birthday with you. Right… But this year is different! There’s nothing I wish more than for you to live your life to the fullest. I’ll make sure of it. Haha! Oh no! We don’t want you to cry all that mascara off haha!”
“While we’re still here, you gotta open your present. Yeah! Go ahead! Exactly! This way, you can keep it and your snacks, strawberry milk, other energy drinks in your room and you don’t have to leave your snack rubbish in the kitchen and you can at least keep the mess within your own room! Really, looking at you hugging that thing, it’s almost half your height. That’s so cute! Oh, but still please throw away your rubbish, even if you do keep them within the confines of your room.”
Shian Lines
“Yo, Makina. It’s your birthday today, isn’t it? Damn, where has all the time gone? I swear it felt like yesterday when I first met you, but that was just barely two years ago. I heard that. No need to thank me. It was two years ago and it was the right thing to do. You deserve a good life.”
“Enjoy your present. It’s a device that projects moons and stars on your ceiling, walls, pretty much anything. It also works as a music box. It’s supposed to be a gift for kids, but I think it’ll look cute in your room and it’ll be fun to show your viewers.”
#hypnosis mic#hypnosis mic oc#hypmic#hypmic oc#hypnosis mic arb#hypmic arb#akihabara division#pixel syndicate#makina setsukura#anika kiyozaki#shian meizono#birthday 2023#makina birthday 2023
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Who's There?
Sometimes Crowley has to do awful things for Hell. TW for suicide in this one. Also on AO3.
Someone was watching Crowley and he was pretty sure he knew who it was. It was Hell it had to be Hell. Perhaps he had been seen drinking with Aziraphale. He knew he shouldn’t have done it only a year after the last time. Or maybe, and this was more likely, they had seen him turn wine into water to save a person from dying in a fiery crash. Or maybe he hadn’t collected enough souls. Surely he had come up with enough ingenious ideas that he really hadn’t done that collected enough souls. That was what usually happened.
Something was following him as Crowley walked. He could feel it but he couldn’t see what it was. It couldn’t be something moral could it? It had to be Hell.
What were they playing at? Hell wasn’t usually so patient. They would just come up and grab him if he had done something wrong. They wouldn’t stalk him down the road in the middle of the night. Or had they come up with something new.
“Crowley.”
“Ah fuck. Er…sorry Lord Beelzebub. What can I do for you?”
“You can stop staring off into space and realize that someone is trying to contact you.”
“What?”
“At the crossroads there.”
“Oh are we still doing the crossroads thing?”
“Yes. So go over there and get that soul, it’s an important one.”
“Right. Will do,” Crowley said. He started walking toward the crossroad ahead and focused more and realized that yes it was in fact a human trying to summon him ahead. The human was…something was different about them. He couldn’t really figure out what.
“Who’s there?” the person called out.
“Aren’t you looking for me?”
“Maybe?”
“What can I do for you?” Crowley asked.
“Don’t you know?”
“Oh I know what you want to trade but what do you want?”
“I want it over with, life, I want to die.”
Crowley frowned, “Why do you need my help with that. There are many ways that one can die…”
“I have to go to Hell!”
“Why is that?”
“My…my child. I need to be in the same place and she killed herself and went to Hell and I have to go there. I can’t seem to do the deed myself. I’ve tried. So…I just need you to take my soul and kill my body so I can get this done and over with.”
Crowley looked at the man. He didn’t really want to take his soul and kill him. He didn’t like killing but if Beelzebub was watching him so he supposed that he had to do it. He had to take the soul and kill the man.
He wanted to stop the man and tell him how much life was worth living through the pain and the loss. He couldn’t imagine what it felt like to lose a child, especially to suicide, but Crowley knew about loss. He wanted to tell the man that there was life worth living that even if you suffered a loss you could find things that were worth living for. The pain might not go away, Crowley knew that for certain, but there were so many beautiful things on the Earth. And humans! Humans were there for such a brief amount of time. The man would die eventually and he might indeed end up in Hell but he didn’t have to rush the whole thing did he?
For all the moments he wanted Aziraphale to pop up and thwart him he really needed the Angel to come and stop this. Even if he got in trouble he could blame it on Heaven and they wouldn’t torture him too badly. But he didn’t have any way of getting Aziraphale there. Just thinking about him wouldn’t work. And Crowley wasn’t even sure where the Angel was.
Crowley sighed.
“What do I have to do?”
“Do you have any specifications as to how I kill your body?” Crowley asked.
“Oh. Uh, just, just do it quick I suppose.”
“And you are absolutely sure,” Crowley said. He wanted to stop the man he really hated when humans did this and he didn’t want to be the one to do this but…he had to, he was being watched.
“I am,” the man said.
“Alright, one soul for one quick death,” Crowley said. Crowley didn’t want to do it but he had too. He was a demon and someone was offering up their soul. Nice and easy.
Crowley touched the man’s chest and stopped his heart. The body fell to the ground and the soul went to Hell. Job done. Crowley felt bad about it but. Well fuck it was his job. With a job well done Hell would be off his back and he could go about his business.
Crowley figured it was time for a drink.
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so my brain is trying to do that thing where it takes something and turns my whole week into shit and i’m trying my best not to let that happen, but i’m...struggling
i’ve mentioned lately how stressed out and overwhelmed i’ve felt, largely due to work-related stuff but it’s also just life in general, and i’ve been trying to manage that as best as i feel like i can at the moment but it’s really tough
and yet for some reason the other night my dad decides he wants us to plan an big, extravagant party for my mom’s birthday which is less than two months away
supposedly years back my mom had mentioned wanting a big party for this particular birthday to him and i dunno if he just forgot until recently or just doesn’t have any idea of how long it takes to plan things like this, but i...don’t know how i’m going to make this happen
first and foremost, i don’t even know if i should be making this happen because there’s a good chance she’s changed her mind since several years ago, not to mention she already has plans for her birthday!!! (she’s going to a concert, the tickets for which...he bought!!!)
if i had any idea this was even a possibility i would have been putting this together months ago, but now april is just around the corner and i don’t even know where to begin because i’ve never done anything like this before.
it’s not to say that i can’t learn or that i can’t ask for some help from people who do have experience with this but like...this is a massive task to drop in my lap this close to her actual birthday and again, while i’ve already been pretty vocal about the fact that i feel incredibly stressed out and overwhelmed
i understand he’s just trying to do something nice, something that shows he cares and is listening and again, he may genuinely just have no idea how complicated this really is, but this has been an ongoing thing where like...i don’t think he fully understands that i’m not just a proxy of him who can do stuff he can’t or doesn’t know how to, i’m my own separate person who needs time to be able to do things, especially things i’ve never done before and would want to make sure i do them well
i don’t think that’s how he actually thinks of me, but that’s how it feels.
one of the biggest things (and maybe this is my fault, maybe i haven’t communicated this enough to him specifically because i know i have with my mom and she’s gotten a little bit better about it) is that it helps me a lot with stress if i can just...have a heads up
if there’s something you need me to do or something big is going to be happening and i’ll be involved someway, just...please, if at all possible because i know it’s not always the case, but please, please, please just try to give me enough time to wrap my head around it
i will be happy to do whatever it is if you just let me having a fucking moment to look at everything before going, “ah, okay that’s where i’ll fit it in” but if i feel like i’m already drowning and am saying, “hey, i’m drowning” and you just keep handing me tasks to complete, especially time-consuming ones or super stressful ones like this i’m going to breakdown and it’s going to be ten times harder for me to accomplish what i need to
i tried to hold it together yesterday as best as i could even though i got into work and immediately felt overwhelmed again, but after barely sleeping last night trying to think of how on earth anyone is going to have enough time to plan for this party when i’ll only have maybe a month to send out invitations, i went ahead and got up super early to try to catch up on work and just as i was starting to make a tiny bit of headway the power went out for a while so i kinda fell apart and now i’m having trouble focusing enough to just finish out what i need to do
and that’s the thing, i’m not trying to be someone who has all these rules and barriers around me to ever ask me to do something or to even approach me or whatever. i hate having to ask for accommodations, even for shit i genuinely need, but especially when it’s just...life and i know we’re all just doing the best we can and we’re all going through shit right now, i really don’t want to make anyone’s life harder by unfurling some long list of demands for my mental health, that’s not what i’m trying to do
i know nobody can tell me exactly what’s going to happen in the future and i know i can’t predict setbacks like the power outage earlier, but it’s like...because those are already so stressful on their own as is and because there’s a whole list of shit over here that is actually avoidable or at least warn-able, i’m just asking for that, that’s it
maybe that’s still too much or again, maybe i just haven’t actually articulated this the way i thought i had, but i just would fucking kill to be able to go like...a week without feeling like there’s something massive hanging over my head that’s just barely holding on by a thread
i want to be able to do nice things for the people i love and care about, i’d love to just be able to be more present in my own life instead of every other day feeling like i need to retreat back into myself, but i just need a little understanding that just because i don’t live a grueling life pulling 48 hours shifts and raising kids doesn’t mean that my time isn’t valuable or that i have all the free time in the world
i’m still a person and one who, shamefully, is not that good at managing stress, but i’m at least aware of it and am trying to ask for what i need so that i can be better at managing it. i still need a realistic amount of time to do certain things and i still need to feel like my time is just as valuable as anyone else’s. If it’s not possible or just too cumbersome to try to work with me when i’m having a hard time then fine, i’ll find some way to manage, i always do, but just...fuck,
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Am I the only one that thought Sweet Magnolias season two was reaaaally bad writing? Like really bad? (Spoilers ahead)
I really like characters like Annie and Tyler, but this is what I don’t like:
- The whole first scene. Everyone is mad at each other from 0 to a 100 just for plot reasons. The only thing I liked was Annie making contact with Jackson (because Annie honestly is amazing).
- The fight between Tyler and Jackson was sooo fake in the beginning and totally unnecessary. Everyone just is looking for fights in this season out of nowhere. But ofcourse he had to break his arm to give him a story line, sigh. I must admit, I did like to see him finding himself more.
- Everyone saying that the ‘sweet magnolias’ are so so sweet, even tho Dana Sue is really nasty towards her daughter and Maddie is trying to do her best but is also neglecting her children in the first part. The only one I really see contributing to other people, is Helen.
- Trotter be like “without you I couldn’t have done it” to Maddie. What?! What have they done for him except just decency? TROTTER RUNS THE WHOLE FUCKING SPA. They honestly do NOT pay him enough.
- I first thought the ‘pouring out’ was cute, but when its every other scene talking about the scenes you just saw - COME ON!
- In the pouring out everyone is like fake ‘oh don’t ask me but also I want to talk about me’
- I like Helen, I like her acting, but she’s really going through some unnecessary shit. I actually thought her and Ryan having other life goals was really realistic, only for him to come back like ‘jk our big major differences based on good talks were just silly’ ?!! Also, I’ve shipped Eric and her since the beginning but this season it felt like they lost their spark…
- Coach Cal suddenly having anger problems… it is plausible, that he’s changed, but right now it just seemed to be trown in the mix to give him a story line and fuck shit up.
- Meaningless inbetween scenes. A boy that wants dinosaur nuggets and oh he’s poor, Dana Sue gets him the nuggets. Ah, Dana Sue, such a saint! Like… what!? If you are poor you are already happy with the free food, right? Like ofcourse I want the dino nuggets for him, but this whole thing seemed just written only for Dana Sue to prove that she is not as bad as she behaves.
- Im invested into the kids more than the adults. Mostly in Annie. She is such a sweet girl. Why is Dana Sue taking away so much from her? I am happy that Dana Sue at least starts thinking about her own behaviour later in the season, but come on, be nicer to your child please :( let her live.
- Okay the whole Isaac thing is just outrageous. It’s funny and Bill is the bud of the joke, but it’s just insane. This is a soap opera now.
- I like Noreen but she didn’t really have interesting things this season. I liked in season 1 that she was ‘the other woman’ (that you often kinda dislike) but she was very naïeve and therefore likeable. And building that bound with Kyle was also cute.
- The whole miss Frances things was also so dramatic. She suddenly appeared more so you could care about her more. I didn’t. I do however care about Maddies mom. Frances is just a random side character, there weren’t really touching scenes with her.
- Jackson was kinda intens with all the staring but him and Annie were kinda cute okay.
- Go Cece! With her career. Although the breakup was a bit forced also.
- I couldn’t care less about Mary Vaughn or whats her name.
- Im only invested in the teens and Helen at this point.
If you enjoyed this season, I’m so happy for you! For me it just got too soap opera-y. I’m invested in the characters and the writing felt just kinda lazy and that frustrates me :(
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I note with some dismay that the whole affair over Azhar Ali is being broadly categorised as an ‘antisemitic row’ or just generally something based on antisemitism, when what he did pretty obviously and unequivocally was criticise Israel. You know? The state of Israel? The state? We’re still tussling on the whole “Is criticising Israel the same as criticising all Jews?” issue and that’s kind of depressing.
Because there’s people out there who will use Israel as an ever-so-clever and ever-so-subtle way of sneaking in some antisemitic nonsense because there are people out there who seem to spend every hour of every day feverishly working out some new, secret way of rolling out the same tired, aggravatingly stupid cannards against Jews. That’s just life, apparently, even in the future. That’s also depressing.
(Seriously, it never fails to knock the wind out of my sails whenever I get some peek into the endless arms race between those who hate the Jews (and really need a better hobby) and those who have to keep track of those who hate the Jews and have to keep track of their ever-expanding list of weirdo secret signals and code words. “Ah! He’s turned around three times and tapped his foot and glanced at the moon! We all know what that means! It means he thinks Hitler was alright!” No! No we didn’t know that! And I’m annoyed now that I do!
Also, as a further aside, that that whole fourteen words and double-H thing remains popular is mind-numbing. It is the dumbest shit. The bar is so low.)
But Israel is also, you know, a state. It takes up physical space. It is a thing. It does stuff. That stuff sometimes impacts places that are not Israel. And if you police people’s opinions on this in a way that’s set up to instantly brand any negative stances as just inherently anti-jew, well, that’s not helpful, is it? Were the protests they were having against judicial reform in Israel also antisemitic because those people were criticising Israeli policy? That seems to be the logic you’re using.
That said, Azhar’s actual statement – that Israel let October Seventh go ahead to serve as an excuse to roll into Gaza – is stupid. Antisemitic? Eh, you can argue the toss on that and I’m sure you’ll find people who’ll go to their graves insisting it is, but I’m less sure. The insinuation that the present administration of Israel, being as it is mostly rightwing nutbags, would want an excuse to go into Gaza? Not crazy. That they’d let an attack like that happen so they could have an excuse? No, sorry. Not buying that.
It sits alongside “Nine-eleven was an inside job”, it’s that kind of thinking. Both attacks were “Allowed to happen” in the sense that in both cases there was fairly obvious information relayed that something was about to go down and then nothing was done about it. So the problem here is complacency more than actual malice. It wasn’t “Muwhahaha I’m going to let people die so I can do a thing!” it was “Yeah yeah sure warnings whatever look I got problems of my own right now oh shit oh fuck what is happening” followed by, you know, a lot of airstrikes.
But that’s me.
And this is all leaving aside of course Labour continuing to cover itself in glory by, for once, standing by someone only to then give up. Why they’d stand by this and not the people, oh, calling for a ceasefire or saying something like “From the river to the sea” or, oh, going on a picket line I’ve no idea given that this was a non-starter from the, er, start.
As said, what he said was fucking dumb. Just really dumb.
Sigh.
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I’m back to cause more chaos! :D (You did my Savage MC so well, how could I not return?)
My idea for this request shall be head cannons of the Brothers reacting to an Mc that’s just over everything. Threats from other demons (including the brothers) don’t phase her. She’ll either have a blank expression or say something like:
Demon: I could kill you right now! 👿
MC:*smiles and raises eyebrows* Then do it. Put me out of my misery right now 😃
Since MC’s died before, she’s just not concerned about her life anymore and would say concerning things like:
“How messy do you think my corpse would leave the ground if I jumped from this ledge? 🤔”
“Go ahead and kill me, you’re making things easier for both of us ☺️”
“I’m pretty sure if it wasn’t for my relation with Lilith, I would still be dead....So close *pouts* ”
When someone asks why she’s like this she just explains with a soft smile and empty eyes about the shit she went through in the Devildom and that she’ll never be the same person she was before she was forced there. “You can’t blame me for being fucked up. I’m just accepting it 😀”
(This is only if you feel comfortable doing this, I understand if you’re not since this can be touchy to other readers)
Oh my god. I was literally thinking about writing something like this three days ago but I got stupid college assignments and completely forgot. I relate to this so much I feel like you and I share a good amount of brain cells thank you so much for this ❣️❣️
Warning: Mention of death, suicidal thoughts
Lucifer: MC, you're late again. How many times do I have to tell you to maintain curfew?
MC: I was busy helping Solomon, Lucifer so lay off me and go scare someone else.
Lucifer: You dare talk to me in that tone of voice?! Is that how you're supposed to talk to me?!
MC: Oh great Sir Lucifer, I've seen death, you see. You will have to do more than just threaten me now.
Lucifer: *shocked* MC... I wasn't....
_______________________________________
Mammon: *seeing MC in a scuffle with a lower demon*
Mammon: MC! How many times do I have to tell ya to not pick fights with other demons!?
MC: *laughs* Why? Cause they aren't related to Lilith and so won't spare my life?
Mammon: MC...no...
MC: Honestly I'd rather be killed for being me than be kept alive in someone else's memory so go away Mammon.
Mammon: *tearing up* MC don't say that... *Holds your hand tight while taking you back home*
_______________________________________
Levi: MC for the last time, stop killing your character within 5 minutes of playing!!
MC: Sorry I can't help it. It's not like I can die that easy in real life!
Levi: ...what?
MC: Ah man these characters are lucky! Look just one little bomb and dead! *kills character again*
Levi: *quitting the game, hanging his head low* Let's a play a different game, okay?
________________________________________
Asmo: MC, would you like to join me in bed tonight? ;)
MC: Sure only if you choke me.
Asmo: Ah that's kinda kinky-
MC: Choke me like Belphie did.
Asmo: *horrified* MC, honey, no!
MC: Come on! Think of it as a kink!
Asmo: *distraught* Stop it MC! We're going to cuddle and kiss and you'll stop talking about this! *drags you and cuddles you tight to himself, softly sobbing*
_____________________________________
Beel: MC, you're standing too close to the edge there!
MC: How messy do you think my corpse will be if I drop from here, Beel?
Beel: *wide eyed* MC what-
MC: Oh my bad, can't have you watch your sister die in front of you again, can we? Ah man *pouts* why did I have to have her bloodline... You could have eaten me so long ago!
Beel: *breaking down in tears* MC no... please...MC just come back inside...*picks you and holds you tight to safety*... MC I would never eat you...
______________________________________
Belphie: MC what's wrong? Why won't you hug me back?
MC: *dry laugh* Sorry Belphie, it's just not the same without you berating my worth and choking me to death.
Belphie: *looks away hurt* ... I'm sorry.
MC: Maybe you can do me a favour instead of half assed apologies.
Belphie: Favour? Sure I can do that.
MC: Do us both a favour and kill me, will you? No more apologies for you, no more worthless living for me, how about that?
Belphie: *buries his head into his pillow* I'm sorry MC... I'm sorry...
________________________________________
Simeon: MC this is the third day you've eaten Solomon's cooking.
MC: Well it's not death, but it's close enough.
Solomon: Wait what?
Simeon: MC...
Luke: *crying and screaming* IM GOING TO KILL THOSE DEMONS! LOOK WHAT THEY DID TO MC!
MC: *pats Luke's head* It's okay Luke, I'm safe here with you guys right?
Luke: YES! THOSE DEMONS WON'T SEE YOU AGAIN!
______________________________________
Satan: MC I'm worried about the books you've been borrowing from the library lately.
MC: *sitting in the middle of books about lethal poisons and easy killing methods* Ah I wonder why~
Satan: Do you think I didn't notice how much you changed after your ressurection?
MC: Well good for you Sherlock. Say have you ever rage killed anyone? Cause I would love to volunteer.
Satan: MC stop. *Holds their hand* Don't be this way.
MC: *lifeless eyes and softly smiling* Try being brought to a whole new world without warning, getting ridiculed and threatened and made to feel weak by people you clearly you want to cherish, and then getting manipulated and killed by the person you only wanted to save.
Satan: *runs his fingers on your palm, listening*
MC: And then! Being brought back to life and told that you were spared for the sake of a dead stranger, who you have to replace.
Satan: *smiles sadly* Does being thrust into existence with a head full of memories and a heart of full anger and pain that isn't yours come close enough?
MC: ... Well a little. *holds his hand back*
Satan: You and I are more similar than you think. Our voices are but echoes of someone else's call. But it doesn't have to be that way always. Don't let it damage you like this.
MC: Ah well the damage is done. And I'm too tired to fix it, so I accept it instead. *dry laugh*
Satan: Well let me watch over this damaged soul then. *Brings out their favourite book* And for now let's read this instead.
MC: Can we go play with the cats later?
Satan: Of course, MC.
Hope this was okay! :') Really loved writing this thank you for the asks 😭😭😭😊😊😊😊
#obey me ask#obey me angst#obey me lucifer#obey me satan#obey me asmo#obey me belphie#obey me beel#obey me levi#obey me mammon#obey me imagine
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Shocking!
18+, minors DNI
Tags: Smut, Sapnap x GN!Reader, Sub!Sapnap, shock collar, heavy degradation, dumbification, self-bondage, blowjobs, ~2k words, this is my first fanfiction in a very long time.
Masterlist and Info
Sapnap has to postpone his shock stream for “personal reasons”. That reason was definitely NOT because it turned him on. Noticing his problem, you decide to take advantage.
“I’ll put that shock collar around my neck, I don’t care.” Or at least that’s what he claimed. Yet, here he was, whining like a baby scared it would hurt.
“Come on babe, it can’t hurt that much. Just stop being a pussy and shock yourself already.” You said as you watched your boyfriend babble like a baby. “Here, give it to me and I’ll do it for you. The sooner you get this over the better.”
Sapnap reluctantly handed over the collar and remote to you before closing his eyes, “I don’t want to know when you’re going to shock me.”
You laughed at him a little as you got down on your knees to strap the collar to his thigh. The metal prongs poked into his skin, and his soft thighs pillowed over the collar a bit as you tightened it.
“Relax a bit baby, tensing will only make it hurt more,” you tried to calm your boyfriend, putting a hand on his other thigh. Sapnap took a deep breathe, and as he exhaled you quickly pushed the button on the remote, sending electricity through Sapnap’s thigh.
He let out a high pitched scream and jumped, then quickly relaxed again. “What? That wasn’t even that bad. Dream and George are such pussies. I can take this.”
You would be lying if you said that the split second before he screamed like a school girl where his face contorted to pain didn’t do something to you. You would also be lying if you said you didn’t want to see it again. “Why don’t we try it more? It might hurt more as you go along, wouldn't you like to be ready for that?” Yes, this will definitely work. Sound reasoning that was definitely not related to you being slightly horny.
“What? You think I’m going to take that much damage? I’m cracked at the craft babe that won’t happen.” To be completely honest, Sapnap didn’t want to admit that the shock straight to his inner thigh did something for him. His ego was to big for him to be giving up power, and sporting a semi from you hurting him wasn’t going to get him ramming into you any time soon.
“Oh come on, just a few more. Better to find out how bad it can get now than live in front of a hundred thousand people.” You said, taking the initiative to go ahead and give him one more shock. His school girl scream dropping a few octaves to his normal yelling. “Just take three more, I know you can do it,”
“F-fine...”
And so he did take it, like the good boy he was. As he got shocked more and more his screams turned into breathy whines. While the pain was still there, each shock sent an additional shock of pleasure straight to his dick. The final shock forced out an almost pornographic moan from your boyfriend, his hands gripping his armrests for dear life. “Aw baby, you did so good! I knew you could do it, you liked this a whole lot more than I thought you would.”
Sapnap did like this a lot, and he didn’t want to stop, in fact he wanted more. More pain, more pleasure, more anything, more you. His dick was aching in his sweat shorts, a small patch of wetness forming where he was starting to leak.
“Ahh, look at you. All hot and bothered from me hurting you. Why don’t we play a small game?” It was more of a statement than a question, and you knew he would say yes. “I want you to strip and lay down on the bed. I’ll be right back.”
Sapnap quickly stood up and began taking off his clothes as you went to go get some water, doing this more so to make him wait than because you were thirsty. You heard him throw himself down on the bed in the other room, and you laughed quietly to yourself at his eagerness. Looking down at the remote in your hand, you wondered how far the signal on the thing reached. Far enough, apparently, as when you pushed the shock button a loud yelp and moan could be heard from your bedroom.
“Baaaaabbbbbyyyyyyyy~ Come back!” Sapnap yelled from across the house, wanting your body on his. You decided to be nice to him and not make him wait any longer, taking off your own shirt as you walking into the bedroom.
“Spread your legs for me cutie.” You said as you climbed up onto the bed, Sapnap immediately doing as he was told. “You’re going to listen to me and follow my directions, if you don’t, this will happen” You send another shock through Sapnap’s thigh and he moans, dick twitching. “I’m going to be nice and suck you off. You must keep your hands above your head, no touching me or yourself. If you thrust into me you get shocked. If you cum without permission you get shocked. If you beak any of my rules in general you get shocked, do you understand?”
Sapnap threw his hands above his head, ‘Y-yes. I’ll listen, I’ll be good. I promise.”
“Good boy.” You shocked him once more just to be mean, his hips raising up from the bed. You decided to ignore it this one, time as he technically didn’t thrust into you. You move your hand towards his leaking dick, already soaking from his precum. Sapnap lets out a loud moan just as the slightest touch, already oversensitive from waiting.
Laughing at his eagerness, you slowly kiss his dick, going up from his base before giving the head a few small licks. Sapnap was almost crying from the pleasure, his soft stomach tensing as he tried his best not to move, his hands gripping at the air wishing to be lost in your hair.
You moved your head down to lick a long stripe, starting from the base once more before taking his tip into your mouth and sucking, hard. Sapnap couldn’t stay still anymore, his hips going up trying to get his dick farther down your throat. You quickly pulled off of his and gave him two shocks, his entire body tensing as pain seared through his upper leg.
“What did I say about following the rules?”
“I-I’m sorry! I didn’t me-AH!” Sapnap was cut off with another shock, more precum leaking from his tip from the mix of pleasure and pain.
“I don’t want excuses, I want you to listen. I’m turning up the collar now, if you fuck up again you’re getting even more pain.” You knew Sapnap would break your rules again, to be completely honest you wanted him too. Seeing him liked this turned you on so much that it was starting to hurt, but you have to take care of your baby before yourself.
Reaching back down you take one of Sapnap’s balls into your mouth, using your hand to work his dick. The noises coming out of Sapnap’s mouth would make a whore blush. You go back up to continue sucking on his tip, before slowly lowering your head down to take him farther down your throat.
You went on bobbing your head, using your hand to cover what you couldn’t fit in your mouth. You decided to test your limits and take the rest of him, forcing his dick all the way down your throat as you choked a bit. All of it was too much for Sapnap to handle, his hands flying to your head and his hips pushing up to push his dick against your throat. You quickly press the shock button and hold it down. The pain so much worse for him than last time.
You push his hands off you and come back up, glaring at him. “What. Did. I. Tell. You. To. Do.” You asked, punctuating each word with a shock to his leg. “You’re such a fucking slut that you can’t keep your hands off me? I only gave you a few rules to following and you can’t even do that, whore.”
Sapnap whined at the degradation as you continued to shock him, the pain causing tears to fall down his cheeks. Babbles of “I’m sorry,” and “Please don’t stop,” falling from his mouth.
“I won’t stop baby, but I’m going to keep shocking you as I do. I don’t care how good you are anymore, do what you want, I can see you’re too dumb and desperate to follow rules anyways. But I swear to god if you cum without permission I’ll strap this shock collar to your cock and watch as you scream.”
Sapnap just nodded, twitching as you shocked him once more before going back down on his dick, taking him all the way down. His hands gripped your bare shoulders, nails digging into your skin every time you shocked him.
He was close and you knew it, he was close before you even started to be honest, but you weren’t going to let him cum. You wanted to see him broken and crying.
“AH! God, baby I need to cum. Can I? Ple-AH!” Sapnap called out as you continued deep throating him while shocking his thigh.
You pulled off more a moment, pretending to think about it. “mmm, no.” You sent another strong shock. Going back down to what you were doing, as Sapnap continues to babble and crying. His nails were starting to leaving red welts on your back and shoulders. All he wanted was to cum down your warm throat.
“Please, please baby ple-AH! Let me cum, I’ll b-be good. I promise! Please babeE~! Let me cum I’ll do anything. I’ve been so good. Please, please, please.” Sapnap’s begging continued, but you just ignored him, happily sucking him off, his salty precum sliding down your throat.
Sapnap was full on sobbing down, one hand in your hair, the other in his mouth, biting down as he focused all his energy in trying not to cum. All he wanted was to be a good boy for you. Follow the one rule you left him. But the pleasure of your warm mouth on his dick and the pain from the shock collar was beginning to get to much. We was bursting at the seems, and the only thing he could think about was your mouth and that damned shock collar.
You took pity on him, his crying and drooling form a pathetic sight to see. You pulled off him for just a second, immediately replacing your mouth with your hand. “You can cum now baby, you’ve been such a good little whore for me.” You said before giving him one more good shock and going back down on his cock.
He let out more babbles of “Thank you” and other incoherent moans as his warm cum filled your mouth, sobbing as you gave a few more shocks before you swallowing around him.
You pulled off him with an audible pop, gently taking the shock collar off his thigh. You give a soft kiss to the two small red marks left by it. Crawling up the bed, you quickly pull his head into your chest, feeling his hot breath and tears on your skin.
“You did so good sweetheart, I’m so proud of you. So, so good for me.” You gave Sapnap praise and gently rubbed his back has he came down from his high. Before long his breathing evened out and his post-orgasmic shaking stopped as he fell asleep in your arms.
“I love you baby,” you whispered as you gently kissed his forehead, drifting off to dream land with him.
#sapnap smut#sapnap x reader#sapnap x gn!reader#mcyt smut#mcyt x reader#mcyt x gn!reader#dteam smut#sapnap x you#sapnap x reader smut#mcyt x reader smut#this is so dirty#i havent written fanfiction in almost two years and i come back with this#I did not proof read this#this took me like three hours#simpnap#my writing#s thoughts#h knee
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ATEEZ San- Back to you (oneshot)
Genre: angst, fluff, suggestive, university au.
Pairing: badboy!San x reader (fem)
Word Count: 7.3K
Warnings: profanities, alcohol consumption, smoking, mentions of bullying and cheating, drink spiking, and attempted sexual assault.
Except Ateez, all other names are fictional.
"I don't understand how these stupid people party here when we've got exams in two weeks," your bestfriend, Doyeon, muttered under her breath while scribbling down some notes. You both were at a café in your university, studying for the upcoming exams.
You chuckled, glancing up at her from your notebook. "Your boyfriend is one of those stupid people who are partying right now."
She rolled her eyes. "Believe me, I want to smack Yunho with this," she held up her notebook, making you snort. "I'm surprised you don't get frustrated when San is literally doing the same thing."
"Well, it's his life," you said. "I'm not his parent who can nag at him to study."
San and you have been dating for a little over eight months now; other than Doyeon and San's friends, no one else knew about your relationship. Doyeon and Yunho were also dating for a while now. You both didn't really know why the boys didn't want other people to know about your relationship, but you both just went with the flow despite witnessing girls throwing themselves at them everyday. Doyeon was really calm about the whole situation, but you actually weren't even though you never let it show; you were quite worried about San leaving you for other women who were like him. You never understood why he's dating someone like you: the type who rarely parties, rarely drinks, never smokes, decently studies and gets good grades, never gets involved in fights; the opposite of him, basically.
Doyeon was about to say something, but your conversation was interrupted by someone who suddenly sat beside you in your booth, placing a textbook on the table. "Don't mind me, ladies," one of your university's badboys, Kangmin, said. "There was no place to sit, so here I am."
Ji Kangmin was handsome, and a typical badboy from what you've heard. You didn't really know much about him personally, but you knew his friend group and your boyfriend's group were rivals and often got into fights.
"I'm surprised you're here," Doyeon stated, raising an eyebrow. "Shouldn't you be at some party?"
"I don't party when exams are near," he said with a small smile. "I know I don't have a good reputation, but unlike other people here who have the same reputation as me, I actually want to score well and decently graduate." You were stunned, not expecting to hear that from someone like him. Well, maybe all badboys aren't the same.
-
"Babe!" San whined sleepily when you pulled his blanket off his body. "God, my head fucking hurts."
"Serves you right for drinking all night," you said, running a hand through his messy black hair.
"But the party was epic," he mumbled, eyes closing at the way you played with his hair.
After a few minutes, San took some painkillers and got up to take a shower. When he finished, he immediately pulled you into a hug. "I missed you," he said, burying his face in the crook of your neck.
You chuckled. "You saw me yesterday morning."
"But that was in class," he murmured, placing soft kisses on your neck, making your heart race. "I didn't get to talk to you."
"Then maybe you should start talking to me in class," you said and immediately regretted it when you felt San tense up.
San moved a step back to look at you. "Babe, you know I can't do that," he stated. "I don't want people to know about us or start—"
"Yeah, I know," you cut him off with a small smile, hiding your disappointment. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that."
"It's fine," he said, kissing your forehead. "Let's go have breakfast, yeah?"
"Um, actually, I have to go back to my dorm," you said, making San frown and ask why. "I've got a study session with Doyeon," you lied; you just didn't feel like being here at the moment.
San sighed, cupping your cheeks. "Babe, you study so much. These exams don't matter much."
Your eyebrows furrowed. "San, these are end of the first semester exams. They're extremely important."
San didn't say anything; he only leaned down to capture your lips with his own. "Stay for a little while, please," he murmured against your lips. Before you could protest, he kissed you again, this time more passionately. He gently pushed you onto his bed, hovering above you before reconnecting your lips. Your hands wrapped around his neck, playing with the hair at his nape. One of San's hands slipped under your blouse, moving to cup your breast, giving it a squeeze. You gasped due to his actions and he took the opportunity to slide his tongue into your mouth, deepening the kiss. Your phone began ringing but both of you ignored it. You were getting wetter by the second and you could feel San's growing bulge pressing against you. When your phone rang for the fourth time, San pulled away with an annoyed sigh. You chuckled, getting up from his bed to get your phone from your bag.
"Hello?" you answered.
"Where are you?! Class is gonna start in ten minutes!" Doyeon exclaimed.
"What? What class? All our classes were canceled for today."
"Mr. Byun said he's gonna take class today. Didn't you check your email?"
"Fuck. I'll be there in five." You hung up and quickly checked your reflection in San's mirror, reapplying your lip balm and tying your hair into a ponytail. San's eyes were on you the entire time.
"Are you ditching your lovely boyfriend for a class?" San asked with a pout. "Especially when you made him get all hard?"
"Yes," you replied with a small giggle. "I'll make it up to you when I'm done, I promise." you placed a quick kiss on his lips before rushing to your dorm to collect your stuff.
-
"Can I sit here?" you heard someone ask, making you look up from your notebook. Ji Kangmin was giving you a small smirk. "Seats are full."
"Go ahead," you said, returning your attention back onto your books. Fortunately, Kangmin studied quietly, not disturbing you even once.
"Why is this so hard?" you muttered under your breath, eyebrows furrowing in irritation due to the differentiation problem you've been breaking your head for.
"Need help?" Kangmin asked.
"Are you good at calculus?"
He snorted, showing you the cover of his textbook. "I'm a math major, darling." Your eyes widened, not expecting that at all. "I thought you knew but you clearly don't," he said with a chuckle. "But I know you're a computer science major." He reached for your notebook, scanning through what you've written. "Ah, so this is where you went wrong," he murmured before explaining everything to you.
After a good three hours of studying, you got up and stretched your arms. Kangmin helped you with a few sums and told you many tricks and tips to save time and make the problems easier to solve. He walked with you to your dorm building since his was right opposite yours. You caught a few people staring at the two of you, but you brushed it off; Kangmin was popular, so obviously they would stare. You had to admit, it felt quite weird to see people staring at you. You were sure they all would react the same way if you were with San.
"I'll see you tomorrow," Kangmin grinned, running his hand through his brown hair. You nodded with a smile before entering your dorm building.
-
You spent the entire week studying with Kangmin and sometimes Doyeon joined the two of you. You were really anxious about the exams, but Kangmin managed to make you calm down a little; you were really grateful for his company.
"So Jihoon asked me out and I said yes!" Hyewon said, making you and Doyeon squeal.
"Girl! I told you this day would come!" Doyeon exclaimed, making Hyewon blush. You and Doyeon teased her for blushing, laughing at how her cheeks got even pinker.
San secretly glanced at you from across the classroom, smiling at the sight of you laughing; he thought you were absolutely beautiful.
"What's he doing here?" Jongho muttered, making San and Mingi follow his line of sight.
"Probably here to find someone to fuck," Mingi said in an unbothered tone.
San focused his attention back on you until that very person tapped your shoulder. "Why the fuck is he talking to my girl?!"
You turned to look at the person who tapped your shoulder. "Oh, hey, Kangmin! What are you doing here?" you asked.
He pulled a notebook from his bag, handing it over to you. "I accidentally took your notebook yesterday, so I came to return it," he said. "Sorry about that."
"Oh no, it's okay, don't worry about it," you smiled. He was about to say something, but your professor arrived, so he had to leave and go to his own class.
After the lecture ended, you had lunch with Doyeon, Hyewon, and Jihoon at your dorm's dining hall. You couldn't help but gush about how great Hyewon and Jihoon's chemistry was; they were the cutest couple you have ever seen.
Your phone rang and you picked it up as it was San. "Hello?"
"Where are you?" San asked, sounding a little annoyed.
"At my dorm's dining hall," you replied. "Why?"
"Come to your room right now," he said and hung up before you could say anything. You quickly had the last few bites of your food before excusing yourself, telling your friends you had some work to do.
You made your way over to your room, spotting San right outside your door, wearing a blue hoodie with the hood up and a black mask. You unlocked your door with your key-card, feeling a little anxious due the serious look in your boyfriend's eyes. He closed the door before moving to sit on your bed.
"Sannie, what's wrong?" you asked, moving to stand in front of him. He stared up at you, staying silent for a while before he took off his mask, tossing it on your desk.
"Why did Ji Kangmin talk to you today?"
"He accidentally took my notebook yesterday so he came to return it," you answered honestly.
San raised an eyebrow. "Yesterday? Why were you with him yesterday?" he asked in a stern tone.
"We were studying. He was helping me with calculus."
San scoffed, getting off your bed. "I'm sure that's not what his true intentions are. Stay away from him." San's words annoyed you.
"And how do you know what his true intentions are?" you asked. "We were literally just studying, that's all."
"I don't fucking like him, Y/N. He isn't a good person and I don't want him anywhere near you. So please just stay away from him."
You sighed, glancing at the tiny cat tattoo on San's finger. "Fine..."
San gently cupped your cheek, making you look at him. He didn't like how disappointed you looked and he couldn't help but think about Kangmin stealing you away from him. "Baby... please trust me, he's just trying to get into your pants." You wanted to tell him that all those girls who flirt with him wanted the same, but you knew he already knew that and he liked the attention he got.
"Okay..." You moved away from him, picking up your textbook from your desk and placing it on your bed. "Do you wanna study with me?" you asked San.
"Nah, I'm not in the mood to study."
"You never are," you snorted, earning a wink from him.
"You study, I'll just take a nap here beside you," he said, placing a kiss on your forehead, lying down on your bed.
"Don't try anything, San," you warned him, lying down beside him. He chuckled, placing an arm around your waist, pulling you closer to his body.
San fell asleep while you studied. When you took a small break, you couldn't help but admire your sleeping boyfriend; he looked so angelic... ethereal, even. You placed a light kiss on his cheek before slowly getting off the bed to go to the bathroom.
When you came back, San was awake. "How long did I sleep?" he asked in a raspy voice.
"Almost two hours," you said, returning to your bed.
"Oh... oh crap! I should get ready. I've got a party to go to tonight," he said, stretching his arms. "Do you wanna come?"
You raised an eyebrow. "You already know my answer to that."
He chuckled, kissing your head. "Have fun studying, babe."
---
"Finally!" Doyeon yelled in happiness. "We're finally done after two weeks of torture!"
"Thank god we have an entire week off," you said, gently massaging your aching wrist.
"These exams were way harder than I expected," Hyewon said and you agreed. "You both are coming for Kang Hyunsuk's party tonight, right?"
"Of course! It's in a huge mansion, you know? Besides, I need to get drunk and laid in luxury," Doyeon said, making you and Hyewon laugh.
You quickly got ready at Doyeon's dorm in the evening before taking a cab to Kang Hyunsuk's mansion that was fortunately not too far away.
The mansion was decorated with LED lights inside and out. The large hall was converted into a dance floor and he even hired a DJ. You were sure more than half of the students at your college was here, and there were certainly a lot of people from the neighboring colleges as well.
Doyeon grabbed your hand, pulling you to the large kitchen where the drinks and snacks were. You both took two shots of vodka each before you greeted some of your classmates. Doyeon was already really tipsy due to her poor alcohol tolerance. On the other hand, you took another shot and you were still quite sober.
"Wow, Y/N, you look so hot!" Hyewon said, approaching you with Jihoon.
You were wearing a lacy dusty-rose bralette with black ripped jeans and combat boots. The bralette showed off more cleavage than you'd usually show, but you were feeling a little extra today.
You noticed Yunho approaching the kitchen with Seonghwa and Hongjoong, his eyes scanning Doyeon from head to toe. You nudged Doyeon with your elbow, gesturing to Yunho with your eyes. She glanced around, eyes landing on Yunho who gave her a smirk. She smiled at him before moving towards him. She whispered something in his ears, making him drag her away immediately. You weren't expecting your bestfriend to ditch you this early, but oh well.
"Hey Y/N," Seonghwa greeted you. "Have you seen San or Jongho?"
"Nope, I came to the kitchen as soon as I got here," you replied, pouring yourself another shot.
"Ah, all right." Seonghwa and Hongjoong took a drink before they disappeared into the crowd.
One of your friends dragged you outside to the area beside the swimming pool; she wanted to introduce you to some people from another university. You spotted San, Jongho, Wooyoung, Mingi, and Yeosang on the other of the pool, surrounded by girls as usual. There were a few guys there and they were all playing a game of spin the bottle. There was a girl sitting on your boyfriend's lap, and that annoyed you a lot. You couldn't do anything about it since San didn't want anyone to know about your relationship. When you got to see the girl's face, your eyes widened; it was your ex-bestfriend, Park Hyejoo. You scoffed in disbelief; San knew who she was and what she did to you in high school, yet he let her sit on his lap. You tried not to pay attention to them by focusing on the conversation your friend was having with the people she had introduced you to. It somewhat worked... until you heard cheers and whistles which caught everyone's attention.
Hyejoo's face was buried in San's neck, no doubt giving him a hickey. He wasn't even pushing her away. You felt your eyes tear up, but you blinked it away. You couldn't look away until she pulled away. And then she kissed him, causing you to gasp.
"Why are you so surprised?" your drunk friend asked you. "She fucks around as much as Choi San does. I even heard they're fuck buddies."
San pulled away from Hyejoo, but he only smirked at her, making no effort to push her off his lap. Yeosang—who was sitting beside San—noticed you watching, and he immediately elbowed San. "You fucked up big time, bro," Yeosang murmured in his ear.
"What do you mean?" San asked.
"Y/N's over there. She saw everything."
San glanced around until his eyes found your disappointed and sad ones. He wasn't even expecting you to attend the party. He scanned you from head to toe, eyes darkening due to the way you looked in that outfit.
"You dumb fuck," Yeosang muttered, low enough for only San to hear. "Are you seriously eye-fucking her right now? Put your damn reputation aside and go talk to her before you fuck shit up more, idiot!"
San excused himself, pushing your ex-bestfriend off his lap, making his way over to you. But of course, he couldn't be seen with you, so he just gestured with his head for you to follow him. Even though you were so upset, you followed him a few seconds later. He stopped at the garden where there was no one; you could still hear the blasting music from here.
San was dressed in all black and he looked absolutely irresistible. You would've asked him to fuck you right here against the wall, but you were damn pissed at the moment.
"Damn, babe," he said, lips pulling into a smirk. "My girl's looking so hot." He reached out to pull you into his arms, but you took a step back. San frowned. "Babe..."
"You knew what Hyejoo did to me," you said with a bitter chuckle. "And you let her sit on your lap." You pointed at the hickey on his neck. "You let her do that to you despite the fact that you have a girlfriend, who is in fact, standing right in front of you!" You would never lash out like this if it wasn't for the alcohol in your system. Hyejoo bullied you a lot in high school to the point where you had to change schools. San knew every little detail of what Hyejoo did, and you remembered how angry he was when you told him about it.
"Babe, calm down, please," San said softly.
"Calm down? You want me to calm down?! That fucking bitch was sitting on your fucking lap the entire time and she gave you a damn hickey! You didn't even stop her!"
"It was just a dare and—"
You scoffed. "And what about the kiss?"
"She kissed me. I didn't kiss back, I swear!"
"And you made no effort to push her off your damn lap even after that, right?"
San sighed; he really didn't want to fight with you right now. "I think you're overreacting, Y/N. Like I said, it was only a dare."
"Yeah, how about I go sit on another man's lap and suck his neck, hmm? I fucking bet you would love that," you chuckled bitterly. San clenched his jaw at your words; if that were to ever happen, he wouldn't hesitate to punch that guy.
"That's not going to happen," he placed his hands on your bare waist, pulling you against his body. "Let's not fight, okay?" he murmured, kissing your head.
You moved away from him, eyeing the hickey on his neck with disgust. "Fuck off, San," you mumbled. "I need a damn drink." Before San could could say anything, you made your way to the table of drinks beside the pool. You quickly downed three shots, eyes closing at the way the liquid burned your throat.
"Woah, woah, slow down there. You'll choke," you heard someone say from behind you.
"Who gives a fuck?" you muttered.
"Well, I certainly do, darling," Kangmin said, moving to stand in front of you. "You look really nice, even though you look like you could murder someone right now."
You glanced at San who returned back to where he was sitting before. Hyejoo started clinging to him, and he made no effort to do anything about it again. You rolled your eyes, not even surprised that your words went into San's ears and left just as fast. "Believe me, I want to," you said, feeling the alcohol starting to hit you harder.
"I don't know who pissed you off, but loosen up, yeah?" Kangmin said, pouring himself a drink. You noticed the tattoos all over his arms, one of them catching your eye. You grabbed his arm, trying to get a better look. "It's a... squirting dick?" you tried to control yourself from laughing.
"My friend's a tattoo artist and he tattooed it on me without telling me," he said with a chuckle.
"I want one too," you whined. "I want one now."
"What? A squirting dick?"
You lightly punched his bicep, swaying a little due to the effect of the alcohol in your system. "No, a good tattoo!"
"You're drunk right now, darling," he chuckled. "It's never a good idea to get a tattoo when you're drunk, trust me."
You pouted. "But I want a tattoo."
He placed his cup on the table and moved his hands to cup your cheeks. "I promise I'll take you to get a tattoo this week, okay? Now, let's go dance, hmm?" You nodded, letting him drag you inside to the dance floor.
San saw everything and his hands clenched into fists. He was so tempted to punch Kangmin and yell at him to stay away from you, but he couldn't risk his reputation like that; he didn't want anyone to know about your relationship no matter what. San went to where you were standing before, taking a tequila shot while he wondered what to do.
"Ji Kangmin and Y/N? Damn!" San overheard someone say.
"I didn't expect him to make a move on her," the other person said. "She's a goody two shoes and he's far from that."
"Kangmin likes women like that actually," the first person said. "And Y/N is very pretty. I'm not very surprised that he went for her."
"Hmm. They do look great together. He seems to like her a lot, no? I saw him walk her to her dorm last week." San's jaw clenched and he quickly made his way inside, searching for you. The dance floor was so crowded, he couldn't even get a glimpse of you anywhere. He tried calling you, but you didn't pick up. He tried calling Doyeon, but she didn't pick up as well.
"Fucking hell," he muttered under his breath, moving through tons of drunk, sweaty people, trying to find you.
After nearly fifteen minutes, he found you sitting alone on of the sofas, head resting on the armrest. "Y/N!"
"Kangmin...?" you lifted your head. "Oh, it's you."
"We're leaving," San said, grabbing your hand.
"No, f-fuck you," you hiccupped. "Go fuck off to Hyejoo." San ignored your words, taking his phone out to book a cab to his apartment. He helped you stand up and pulled you along with him. You wanted to protest, but your body was aching and you really just wanted to sleep.
You fell asleep on San's shoulder in the cab. He carried you bridal style and unlocked his door with the passcode, moving to his bedroom. He gently placed you on the bed and removed your boots. You opened your eyes due to the movement, feeling quite sick. "San..." you murmured. "I think I'm gonna throw up." San quickly lifted you up and took you to the bathroom, holding your hair back while you threw up in his toilet. He gently rubbed your back until you were done.
You brushed your teeth with the toothbrush you kept at San's place, and you took a quick hot shower, sobering a little. San gave you one of his t-shirts to wear and he dried your hair for you.
As soon as your head landed on the pillow, you fell asleep.
-
When you woke up, your head was pounding terribly. You slowly opened your eyes, immediately recognizing that you were in San's apartment; you couldn't remember much of what happened last night. You moved to his bathroom to take a painkiller and finish your morning routine. After you took a shower, you wore one of his black hoodies with one of your shorts that you usually kept at his place.
You felt a pair of muscly arms wrap around you. "You look so good in my clothes," San murmured, placing a kiss on your head. You turned around in his arms, titling your head back to look at him. You were about to wrap your arms around his neck, but your eyes landed on the hickey on his neck, reminding you of the events that happened last night, making you immediately pull yourself away from his embrace.
San frowned. "Babe—"
"San," you start. "Is your reputation that important that you can't even push another girl away when she's throwing herself at you? Especially when you know just how terrible that girl is?" you asked.
San took your hands in his. "Y/N, I'm sorry. I know I shouldn't have let—"
"But you still did," you argued. "Why don't you want to tell people about us, San? Is it because I'm not like you or your friends? Do you think I'm not attractive enough to be next to you?" He didn't say anything. "I feel like you're just using me," you continued, remembering the amount of times you've heard people say San only screws around. "Do you even love me?" The last question made San freeze. You had fallen in love with San months ago, but he didn't know and probably wouldn't have even noticed.
You waited for him to say something, but he only kept quiet, eyes fixated to the floor. "San, I think we should just," you gulped, eyes tearing up again. "We should b-break up. I really can't tolerate this anymore..." Your words felt like knifes were constantly slicing his heart. "Don't you have anything to say?" you asked, hoping he would fight for you or convince you that continuing this relationship is worth it. You wished he would change.
"How can I when you've already made up your mind?" San murmured, avoiding your eyes. "If you think breaking up is what's best then okay..." he wanted to say much more. He wanted to beg you to not leave him. He wanted to tell you just how much he loved you. But he couldn't. Even if he tried, he just couldn't.
"I'll collect my stuff from here tomorrow," you mumbled, putting your boots on. San could only nod as he watched you.
Before you could leave, San stopped you. "I... I just wanted to ask you... if you ever," he took a deep breath. "If you ever loved me."
You smiled sadly. "It doesn't matter," you whispered, but it was loud enough for him to hear you. "Take care, San," you mumbled before walking out the door, shattering his heart.
-
"You fucked up even more," Yeosang said, watching San smoke a cigarette.
"That's very helpful. Makes me feel great," San stated sarcastically, blowing the smoke to the air.
"No offense, Sannie, but I agree with Yeosang," Hongjoong said. "You should've told her how you felt instead of keeping quiet."
"I know," San sighed. "But she already made up her mind."
"Dude, you're really dense," Wooyoung stated. "She asked you if you had something to say. That translates to 'fight for me.' I don't think you've noticed, but Y/N is definitely in love with you."
San's head shot up. "She wouldn't have broken up with me if she really loved me, Woo."
Seonghwa groaned in frustration. "If I was in Y/N's place, I would dump your stupid ass too."
"Agreed," Yeosang said. "I told you before, San, your reputation is going to fuck up everything. You need to let go of your past as well before it's too late."
"Ji Kangmin's got his eyes on her," Mingi stated. "I heard his friends talking about it."
"Yeah, I heard that too. Y/N is close to him," Jongho added.
San rolled his eyes, taking a drag from the cigarette. "He has nothing else to do other than stealing the girls I like."
"Exactly, and you're letting him do it again," Yunho said, taking the cigarette away from San and crushing it with his shoes. "You have to make a decision Sannie. Either you sort things out with Y/N, or you lose the woman you love to that very bastard again."
---
"So you had the hots for Y/N, huh?" Kangmin asked San while he waited in line to order his drink.
"That's none of your business," San said in a cold tone to his ex-bestfriend.
"I saw you talking to her privately that day," he said, referring to the party you attended almost two weeks ago. San ignored his words. "I don't know what was going on between the two of you," Kangmin continued. "But whatever it was, I'm glad it didn't last long. I want to make her mine."
San scoffed. "You just want to get into her pants."
Kangmin snorted. "Obviously. But after spending two weeks with her, without you around, I'm quite interested. Y/N is gorgeous and has a great personality. She's a rare gem, you know? I bet she'd be just as wonderful in bed and tastes as sweet as she loo—"
San took a step towards Kangmin, grabbing the collar of his shirt. "If you don't shut the fuck up, I'll break your damn face!" San warned.
"Ohhh, I'm so scared," he teased, pushing San away. "Fuck off, Choi San. Someone like Y/N doesn't deserve a bastard like you. You weren't and will never be good enough for her." San chose to ignore him, not wanting to cause a big scene at the café. Kangmin's words stabbed him in the heart. San always thought he wasn't good enough for you, but he never expected to hear anyone say it out loud.
Kangmin's phone started ringing and he couldn't help the smirk that formed on his face. "Hey, gorgeous," he answered, loud and clear. "I'm at the café near your building, getting you your favorite drink and some cupcakes. I'll pick you up from class."
"That won't be necessary," you replied, pushing the door of the café to enter. You instantly spotted Kangmin and made your way towards him, unaware of San who was standing right behind him. "Hi!" you said to Kangmin who hung up once he saw you.
"Hey, beautiful! How was class?" he asked, secretly glancing at San; you still hadn't noticed San as your back was facing him.
"Ugh, tiring. I hate extra classes. I couldn't understand any—" your phone started ringing, interrupting your sentence. You answered the call as it was from your bestfriend.
"Where are you?" Doyeon asked.
"At the café near our dorm," you replied.
"Come over fast, we have to get ready for Hyewon's party. She wants us to come early cause she needs help."
"I'll be there in a bit."
-
"I didn't expect any of them to be here," you said to Doyeon while drinking some whiskey and coke from a red cup, watching your ex-boyfriend converse with his infamous group of friends; they usually went clubbing on Saturday nights. "Aren't you gonna go over to Yunho?"
"I don't wanna ditch you," she answered. You gently pushed her in Yunho's direction.
"Go, I'll be fine."
Before she could reply, Kangmin wrapped his arms around you, startling you a little. Doyeon gave you a wink before making her way towards her boyfriend, leaving you with Kangmin.
"Can we talk?" he whispered in your ear, making sure to move closer to your body once he noticed San watching. You nodded, letting him pull you upstairs. You had gotten quite close to Kangmin these last two weeks; you were really glad to have a friend like him. He distracted you from the pain you felt from not being with San anymore.
Kangmin gently pushed against the wall, trapping you between his arms. You gasped. "What are you doing?"
"I like you, Y/N," he confessed with a smile. "I wanna date you." Before you could say anything, he kissed you. You were a little too shocked, so you let him kiss you for a few seconds. When you regained your senses, you pushed him away. He stared at you, confused by your actions.
"Kangmin, I'm sorry, but I don't feel the same way..."
Kangmin rolled his eyes. "It's cause of Choi San, isn't it?"
"No," you lied. Of course it's cause of San. You were still in love with him. You didn't want to date anyone until you got over him. "I only see us as friends, Kangmin," you stated honestly. "You're a really good friend and I don't want to lose you."
Kangmin sighed. "Okay, let's just forget about this. Let's have a drink, hmm?" You nodded, following him downstairs to the kitchen.
You were talking to one of your friends while Kangmin got a drink for you.
"Thanks," you said, taking the cup from him. You took a sip of your drink. It tasted a little salty, but you didn't mind. You felt yourself relaxing a little while you nodded your head to the music. By the time you finished your drink, you felt pretty lightheaded. You clinged to Kangmin's arm. "Hey, could you take me to the couch?" you requested, words slurred. "I don't feel very good..."
"Of course," Kangmin lifted you into his arms, bridal style. He carried you upstairs into one of the rooms, shutting the door behind him with his foot. He placed you on the bed. "You don't know how long I've waited for this," he said, licking his lips while he took your crop-top off. You didn't know what was happening and your vision was really blurry. Kangmin pushed you onto your back before hovering above you. The sudden movement made your head spin even more, causing you to pass out. "Oh, too bad she couldn't stay conscious for this..." he murmured to himself. He ran his hands up from your jean-clad legs to the soft skin of your abdomen before reaching behind your body to unclasp your bra. Before he could pull the piece of clothing away from your body, the door swung open.
"You fucking bastard!" San yelled, pushing Kangmin off of you. Jongho and Hongjoong were right behind San.
"What the fuck, dude?!" Kangmin yelled. "Get out! Can't you see we're busy?!" His words pissed Jongho off. He immediately grabbed Kangmin by the collar and punched him twice in the nose. Kangmin fell to the floor, holding his broken, bloody nose in pain. Jongho wanted to punch him one more time, but Hongjoong held him back. "Don't. You'll end up killing him."
San started crying when he saw your passed out form; he couldn't even think about what would've happened if his friends didn't overhear Kangmin's friends talking about him spiking your drink. San clasped your bra back and put your crop-top on you before he lifted you into his arms. "I'm taking her to my apartment," he said to his friends.
"I'll drive you," Hongjoong offered.
-
When you woke up, you immediately recognized your surroundings. You had absolutely no idea of how you ended up in your ex-boyfriend's bedroom.
Your head was pounding and you wondered what time it was as it was really sunny outside. Before you could get off San's bed, he entered the room.
"You're awake," he said softly, relief clear in his eyes. "Take a shower and come eat. You must be really hungry."
"What happened? What's the time right now?" you questioned, your heart racing at the mere sight of him in a lilac hoodie and black sweatpants.
"I'll tell you after you eat," he said with a smile that didn't reach his eyes. "It's three in the afternoon. Doyeon got some clothes for you. There's a spare toothbrush in the bathroom."
"Thanks," you mumbled, getting up to go to the bathroom.
After you took a shower, you made your way to San's kitchen. You took a seat at the dining table, looking at all the different dishes on the table.
"You made all this?"
San shook his head. "I wasn't able to cook today. Wooyoung and Seonghwa made it. They left a few minutes ago." You noticed how tensed and sad he was; you wanted to ask him what was bothering him, but you knew he wouldn't answer your question until you ate.
You both ate in a comfortable silence. You tried to recall the events from last night, but you weren't able to. You frowned, wondering if you really drank that much.
"Are you all right, San?" you asked, settling on his couch after you both finished eating.
He took a deep breath and you noticed the slight dark circles beneath his eyes. "Can I hug y-you?" he asked, voice cracking while his eyes teared up.
You immediately scooted closer to him on the couch, wrapping your arms around him. He buried his face in the crook of your neck while he held you tightly. His body shook convulsively while he cried, his tears wetting your neck. You ran a hand through his soft hair, knowing it would help calm him down a little.
San pulled away from you, wiping his tears with the sleeve of his lilac hoodie. "I'm sorry..."
You grabbed his hand, intertwining it with yours. "What happened, Sannie?"
Hearing you call him by his nickname brought another set of fresh tears to his eyes. Your other hand reached up to wipe his tears away.
"I love you, Y/N," he confessed, more tears rolling down his cheeks. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you that before. I'm so sorry for being a jerk to you and prioritizing my reputation. I fucked up and I regret it so much." You took a deep breath, trying to control your rapid heartbeat while you listened to every word he said. "I felt like dying after what happened last night. I'm so sorry, this is all my fault," he sobbed.
Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "What happened last night?"
"O-Oh you don't remember...?" You shook your head. San cleared his throat, trying his best to not to break down again. "Wooyoung and Hongjoong overhead Ji Kangmin's friends say that he spiked your drink after you rejected him." you froze in shock. "They immediately told us about it, and me, Hongjoong, and Jongho rushed over to you. You weren't conscious when we found you. Your top was off and he was about to take your bra off as well, but I pushed him away. Then Jongho punched him. I brought you here after that."
You stared at San in disbelief. "Kangmin s-spiked my drink...?"
San nodded. "He had it all planned. I'm sorry, Y/N... none of this would've happened if he didn't see us together." You were too shocked to say anything; you couldn't believe Kangmin would go this low just cause you rejected him. "Ji Kangmin was my bestfriend in high school. After I got a girlfriend, he acted like a bitch to me cause he wanted her. I really loved her, and she cheated on me with him. He spread a lot of false shit about me after I ended our friendship. When I tried to move on with another girl, he took her away from me too. I didn't want other people to know about us only because he would find out. I didn't want him anywhere near you because I knew he would try to take you away from me. I didn't push Hyejoo away that day because he was watching me and would get suspicious of my actions if I pushed her away. I tried my best to do everything that would keep him away from you, but I still failed..."
You burst into tears, wrapping your arms around San; you had no idea he went through all this. "I'm sorry, San. I should've listened to you when you told me he wasn't a good person," you managed to say through sobs.
"No, Y/N, I'm the one who should say sorry for not telling you all of this before." He held you, gently rocking you back and forth while he cried with you. "Thank you for rejecting him..."
You pulled away, cupping his cheek. "How could I ever date someone else when I'm love with you, San?"
His heart raced in his chest due to your words. "That's why you rejected him?"
You nodded. "And I'm glad I did."
San smiled, leaning his forehead against yours. "Can I..." he hesitated "Can I kiss you?"
"Yes, please."
San immediately captured your lips with his own, kissing you oh so gently. You wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him closer. He smiled, causing you to smile as well while you kissed him; you both missed this so much. The kiss was slow and soft, the two of you just wanting to savor this moment. Your hands played with his hair while his hands lazily ran down the expanse of your back. San pulled away, holding you tight against his chest.
"I know I hurt you a lot and I don't even deserve to speak to you right now... but I want to start over, Y/N," San said honestly. "I want to treat you the way you deserve... show you off to the world... I want to make things right between us. These two weeks were pure torture without you, and I realized that I can't... I can't live without you, Y/N. I really need you, baby."
You rested your head on his chest and you could hear his fast heartbeat. "I need some time, Sannie." you noticed him tense up a little and you knew exactly what he was thinking. "And no, this isn't me indirectly rejecting you or anything. I want to be with you, San. I always have and that isn't gonna change. I just need a little time, considering everything that happened." San nodded in understanding. "I promise that I will come back to you."
"I love you and I'll wait for you," San said, placing a kiss on your head.
"Thank you... I love you too, Sannie." He giggled, loving the way you say those three heart-fluttering words. He cupped your cheek to pull you into another sweet kiss, making your heart race again.
The two of you knew that no matter what, you both would always find your way back to each other.
#ateez#san#seonghwa#yeosang#choi san#mingi#wooyoung#hongjoong#jongho#yunho#ateez imagines#ateez san#san ateez#ateez university au#ateez badboy au#badboy!ateez#badboy!san#ateez san imagines#ateez smut#ateez suggestive#ateez angst#ateez fluff#ateez oneshots#ateez scenarios#park seonghwa#jeong yunho#kang yeosang#jung wooyoung#choi jongho#kim hongjoong
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can u do a part 2 if 'hate is a strong word' maybe with some nsfw
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Title: Hate Is A Strong Word P2
Warning(s): cursing, NSFW, arguing, fighting etc.., praising, degrading, maybe a bit of humiliation? Idk. , unprotected sex
Pronouns: They/them, afab
Synopsis: You and Karl end up arguing after you get jealous, resulting in sex between the two of you.
Pairing: c!Karl X Dom! Reader
Word count: 1.7k
Part 1: Hate is A Strong Word (sfw)
Note: unedited*
- If some words don't make sense or spelling is wrong than sorry, I'm too lazy to proof read and edit my fics.
- written in my notes app
╰──────────────────⋞╯
Karl put his hands up in defeat “I don’t understand why you’re so angry about this! I promise to you that nothing else happened!” Karl shouted “oh yeah? Then where’d you get that love bite from??” You pointed out a red mark on his neck “it’s a mosquito bite!” Karl argued back, you took a step towards him “oh? You’re calling Sapnap a mosquito now?”
“No! It really is just a mosquito bite! Please trust me on this!” Karl moved away from you “you know why I don’t like you seeing Sapnap!” You were on the verge of tears “holy shit- are you crying? Babe, I’m sorry I made you feel like this..” Karl approached you.
You got ready to fight and put your hands up “I’m not trying to hurt you, can I please just give you a hug? You’re not in the right headspace right now..” Karl reached his arms out to you. You lowered your defenses and looked away as you allowed Karl to embrace you.
“Why would you go out of your way to ignore my feelings? I told you to leave Sapnap alone for a reason!” You exclaimed “I know! I tried to avoid him but I couldn’t help running into him” Karl apologized “if I go to Las Nevada’s and talk with Slime boy- will he be able to truthfully tell me that nothing happened between you and Sapnap?” You started to cry.
“I wish you could just trust what I’m saying! Of course Sapnap and I did nothing!” Karl frowned “prove it! Kill him or something! Burn his house down!” You were hysterical “you know I can’t do that! Look- let me just make it up to you, do you want me to get you something to eat?” Karl caressed your cheek.
You slapped his hand away “if you want my forgiveness than you better listen good!” Karl’s ears perked up and he started listening right away “I’m gonna go to the kitchen and get a glass of water and when I come back I want you to be stripped naked on that fucking bed, alright?” You crossed your arms.
“W-what? Of course!” Karl’s cheeks heated up and he was quick to follow your instructions, struggling to pull off his clothes as you left the room. You walked down the stairs and slowly made your way to the kitchen, maybe you had just been overreacting but you wouldn’t let Karl know that he was right.
You grabbed a glass and poured yourself some water, sipping from it slowly while thinking about the whole situation. Sapnap was 100% trying to make you jealous so you knew you’d have to work harder to get him back!
You returned upstairs, opening the door and being met with Karl’s naked body spread on the bed. He opened his legs up shyly to you, revealing his hard erection he had gotten “oh baby.. look at you, you’re so gorgeous..” your lips pursed into a small smile.
“T-thank you Y/n..” Karl glanced away from you timidly, you walked over and crawled onto the bed. You began to slowly strip yourself of your clothes, pulling your blouse over your head and shimmying your pants to the floor.
Karl looked up at you, mesmerized by the way your body looked in the lighting “oh you’re so handsome..” Karl mouthed out to you quietly. Karl reached out to touch you but you slapped his hand away “no touching, this is supposed to be your punishment” you told him off for it.
You got between his legs and stared up at him intently, he looked down at you and puffed his cheeks out “well- are you gonna do anything?” He asked. “Not if my out keep being impatient, Karl!” You furrowed your eyebrows “okay okay- sorry darling..” he kept quiet and shut his mouth.
“Good boy, now stay still and keep your hips on the bed” you instructed him as you slowly leaned forward and licked a line up his shaft. He gasped and whines softly, covering his face up in embarrassment “you look so fucking pretty like this, why are you hiding from me?” You took his hands off his face.
His face was a pure red colour, sweat dripping down his forehead “I’m so embarrassed..” he mumbled. You brought your hand up and groped his balls for a moment, relishing in the way his body reacts to you “s-stop that feels weird!” Karl pleaded for a moment “do you really want me to stop?” You asked him again.
He kept quiet for a few seconds “n-no..” you smiled in delight and continued your actions. Karl bucked his hips up against your hand which resulted in you pinning his hips down “if you can’t stay still then I’m gonna have to tie you down- would you like that?” You threatened him “n-no please.. I can be good for you!” He gasped.
You nipped on the soft skin of his thighs, leaving a large bite on one of them. It started to bleed a bit so you just licked it up, Karl winced and closed his legs around your head “that feels weird!” He said out loud.
You rubbed and caressed his thighs gently “sorry baby..” you cooed, you got on top of him and straddled his lap. You grabbed the back of his head and brought him closer to you so you could have better access to his neck, kissing and sucking the light skin.
You tried not to give in to your thoughts but you couldn’t help but take a bite, ripping a loud moan from Karl’s mouth “ah!” He moaned. You pulled away and the both of you just stared at each other awkwardly for a moment “t-that felt good..” Karl admitted.
You went back to your work, marking up Karl and biting him whenever you felt like it. When you leaned back and admired him is when you saw how red his neck was now, you clenched your thighs together and gulped nervously as you realized you may have liked this more than you thought.
“P-please..” Karl begged “hm? Please what?” You asked “please ride me- or let me fuck you!” His hips rutted away against the air desperately “why should I give you anything you want? You were being so bad today!” You reminded him “please? I can be so good for you! I-if you let me touch you than I can prove it!” He pleaded.
You sighed and gave in to his demands, getting off him and laying down on the bed so he could touch you. Your skin was bare and the gust of cold air coming from the window every so often would make your nipples harden, you held onto a pillow gently as you felt Karl part your legs for you.
Karl licked his lips “this looks like the best meal I’ve ever seen in my entire life..” he commented as he stared at your wet folds, his fingers opening you up. Karl slid between your legs and stuck his tongue out, licking along your slit and moaning at the taste.
“Oh you taste so good.. how could I ever want to eat anything else?” Karl’s arms wrapped around your thighs to keep you glued against his face “a-ah! H-hey Karl, slow down!” You gasped, your hand grasping onto his hair which only encouraged him to go faster.
His tongue slid deep inside of you, exploring your fleshy wet cave. Your pussy clenched around him, your clit rubbing against his face as he worked hard to please you “I’m close..” you let Karl know. You released on Karl’s face and threw your head back, your legs shaking a bit as he continued to eat you out through your orgasm.
“Alright.. you earned it- come here big boy!” You invited him to fuck you, opening your legs wide enough so he could get buried deep in you. Karl quickly got to it, his cock sliding into your wet sheath and being surrounded by your warm walls.
Karl thrusted in and out with no pattern whatsoever, rutting into you harshly like an inexperienced teenage boy “y/n!” Karl moaned out your name as he started to go faster. Karl put his hand above your head to stabilize himself and keep him from falling over.
“P-please let me cum inside of you, please!” Karl begged “fuck- go ahead!” You arched your back and allowed Karl to cum inside of you. His load being shot deep inside of your vagina, coating your thick warm walls with his white semen.
Karl pulled out and flopped on the bed, panting heavily as he tried to rest “don’t go to sleep now! You still have a long day ahead of you, go get dressed you bum!” You sat up and encouraged him to get out of bed.
Karl groaned and got out of the bed, his legs shaking a bit as he stood up. He walked over to his dresser and began to get dressed, pulling his hoodie over his head and slipping on some pants. You felt lazy so you just threw a big shirt on and a pair of shorts, the two of you now dressed and ready to take on the world.
You finally got the idea to what your great genius plan to get Sapnap back was! You looked down at the ground and sighed, turning your head to face Karl and tell him what was on your mind.
“You know what, Karl baby? I want you to go see Sapnap right now and tell him how sorry I am for overreacting” you smirked. Karl had most likely thought you were turning a new leaf, being the bigger person when really you were just fulfilling your master plan.
Karl was littered with hickies and love bites all along his skin, you couldn’t miss them! Even his oversized hoodie couldn’t cover the marks up! Your plan was to expose his marks to Sapnap so he would finally see that Karl was yours and yours alone! Hopefully it’ll work.
#mcyt requests#mcyt x reader smut#mcyt smut#dsmp x reader smut#dsmp smut#dreamsmp x reader smut#dreamsmp smut#dream smp x reader smut#dream smp smut#c!karl smut#c!karl jacobs smut#karl jacobs smut#karl jacobs x reader smut#c!karl Jacobs x reader smut
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Title: pretty eyes [short story]
Pairing: Gojo Satoru x gn!reader [soulmate au; takes place eight years before the yuuji and sukuna fusion]
Genre: josei, romance, fluff, comedy, and your normal tragic angst!
Summary: in which the right eye is mine and the left eye is yours and when we meet for the first time, you see your own eyes staring back at you.
Warnings: language, blood, minor manga spoilers, mild ooc gojo and death
Notes: can we all just sit down admire satoru? Like the eyes man, the attitude omg... Ah im so sorry in advance if hes ooc here sksksk it is my first time to write about any jjk characters and I havent fully grasped them yet despite reading the manga anyways i wont be online next week and tomorrow so i decided to publish this ahead of time. ily all and again thank you for the love and support, it does mean a lot *bows down* see you all again when i’ve got time? jskskss i fucking hate college and online classes, satoru save me please
soulmate au’s [not read in any particular order nor are they
connected, they just share the same trope]
Pretty eyes [gojo vers.] || lasting blues [toji vers]
tragic soulmate au series || taglist
“Pretty.” were the very first words you uttered in complete awe as you saw yourself in the mirror and no, this wasn’t directed to your physical appearance. It was directed to your left eye, the eye of your soulmate.
Contrasting to your normal boring color on the right, your soulmate’s eyes were ethereal and unreal. How could someone have such pretty eyes? It was completely surreal at that point that you refused to believe that someone with these eyes were actually human.
You placed one hand and gently caressed the left side of your face where the pretty eye rested, “You must be an angel.” you muttered, “Only angels have pretty eyes.”
Thus like every child you gave your soulmate a nickname, ‘pretty angel’ and every night before you slept, you’d wonder out loud how your pretty angel was doing, if they were nearby, or anything like that. You wonder what type of food they like, do they like to leave the window open for a cool wind or do they like their chocolate hot or iced.
Yet as you grew older, the pretty angel faded out into your thoughts. The pretty idea of soulmates and love disappeared like the story books you read as a child. The pretty blue eyes on your left is forgotten as life takes a toll on you.
They say death was inevitable, when your mother died in middle school, you watch as your father’s left eye turn to your mother’s color. You watched as he clenched her hand, like it was some last resort of plea. You watched him cry as he passed by the mirrors and you wondered, would it hurt like that too?
It baffles you how beautiful and cruel the soulmate system was.
How every time your father would stare at his own reflection, his left eye would be nothing but a reminder of your dead mother.
You let out a second meek cough in the quiet bookstore that night, the sounds of the car passing by were nothing but quiet noise to you as you immerse yourself in the literature book you were reading, your students would surely love this one.You let out another cough as you turn around to find a small space to read since standing for too long made you tired too quickly.
You’re too enchanted by the words of the author that you don’t even notice the rather tall man in front of you.
You look up, ready to give a quiet apology but stop short when you notice how ethereal the stranger looked. Albeit he wore a pair of weird Lennon shades at this time of night, he reminded you very much of an angel with his snow white hair.
You don’t even notice how your left eye is returning back to it’s normal color, the stranger does though and it surely was odd to see his eyes on a stranger.
“Well,” the stranger has a shit-eating grin decorating his handsome features, he definitely looked like trouble for sure, “This is unexpected.”
He lowers his shades and your eyes immediately widen as you suddenly cup the left side of your face, you’d recognize those unique eyes anywhere, after all, you had those on your left eye since you were born, “Y-You.” you muttered, the shock momentarily eating you up.
“Yeah, me.” He grins, loving the sudden attention, “Wow, I was expecting something like fireworks or flowers to appear.” He suddenly teased, bending down to your level.
Now that you notice it, he was very, very tall.
“I…” You blink, trying to gain your composure, “Wow…”
“Did I pass your expectations?” it’s been a few minutes since you started talking and all he has been doing is teasing you.
“You do look like an angel.” You complimented and his eyes widened at the rather out-of-place compliment, “Your eyes are very pretty, thanks for letting me borrow them for twenty-two years.”
Gojo Satoru thought he had the upper-hand, after all, you looked quite meek but when you said those compliments, he was sure that you were going to be the teasing one in this whole-soulmate thing.
So he tries to one up you.
“I’m Satoru Gojo but you can call me tonight.” He grinned, trying to tease you once again, the corny pick up line sounds suave but your blank expression says otherwise.
“I’m Y/N L/N and think I should call you in the morning, it is quite late right now and I still have classes at eight am.” You mumbled, looking down at your watch, “How about you just walk me home, then?”
“Okay.” Satoru immediately raises his hands, signaling that he was giving up, “First off, you should be more hyper aware that I may be a serial killer.”
“Are you?”
“What?”
“Are you a serial killer?” you repeat, “That would be awfully disappointing if my soulmate was one since I’d immediately give you up on the police. I’m not interested in being in a Bonnie and Clyde type of thing and I think it’s too early for me to die.”
“You’re very upfront about these sorts of things.”
“Well, you’re very teasing for someone who just met their soulmate a few minutes ago.” you shrug, “So, are you going to walk me home or not?”
“Ah, bossy too. I love the attitude already.”
“We’re spending our whole lives together. You might as well get used to it.”
You’d think the idea of soulmates would scare you after the firsthand experience with your parents but curiosity always got the best of you and the white-haired man proved that maybe it would be different this time.
Throughout the few months you’ve spent with him, You’ve noticed that Gojo Satoru and you may be alike in some ways but in most ways, he was different.
First, he was enigmatic. You’ve known the man for a couple of months now and you’ve been going out on dates but you don’t know much about him except that like you, he’s a teacher at a good school and he tends to be conceited when he talks about his personal skills as a teacher.
“...What are you doing?” Satoru asked, peeking from behind your shoulder as you type in the grades of your student for your class.
“I’m grading my students.” You muttered, it was after dinner at your place and he was lazing around your place, the sound of faint jazz music could be heard throughout your small space and the wafting smell of freshly baked brownies filled the room, “Aren’t you supposed to be doing something since you're a teacher?”
Satoru quirks a brow as if you had said something odd then it seemed like realization had dawn upon him at that moment.
“Ah, I’m not doing much since my students are on break.”
“Didn’t you say that last time?”
Silence filled the room and Satoru breaks it off with his very famous ‘heh’ that made you inwardly roll your eyes and chunk the pillow that you’ve been hugging towards his direction, “Stop slacking off, you’re a teacher.” You scold him mildly, followed by a small cough.
“Ah, Y/N-chan. You’re so mean to me,” He frowned, handing you the mug filled with water, “...No fair.”
“You're a teacher and you’re slacking off.” You deadpanned, ignoring his sly ways of trying to get you in his arms, “How is that even fair?”
“My students can handle themselves so well that I don’t need to babysit them.” He hmphed, arms crossed and head held up high in a rather arrogant manner. You could only only scoff back a reply at his rather haughty attitude but you’ve gotten used to it to the point where you just roll your eyes.
“You’re a very bad teacher, Satoru.”
“Hey, I am considered one of the best and it’s an honor-”
You clicked your tongue and just pinched his cheek in reply to get him to stop drawling on about his achievements. You wondered if you dated a man child or something.
Second, despite his teasing nature and good looks, he’s a rather shy bean and has some insecurities about it too, maybe it was because there were moments where you couldn’t really understand your soulmate and his puzzling life. He didn’t tell and you didn’t want to pry because you technically both had your whole life to get around that subject.
Luckily, you seem to have found a remedy for moments like that.
“Satoru…” You called out to your soulmate who was staring at the nutrition content of the wafers on his hand, “Satoru!”
“Oh, sorry. What were you talking about?” he finally snapped out of his daze and turned to you who was standing there, hand on your hip. The crispy wafers on his hand are long forgotten.
Your soulmate is good looking, alright. If anyone were to pass by him they wouldn’t see the minor zilch of worry in his eyes.
“Are you alright?” You ask, walking closer to him, completely serious.
“...You aren’t going to leave me, right?”
You raise a brow at the sudden question, wasn’t he too young to have some mid-life crisis? Was this because of the soulmate movie you watched late last night about the soulmate leaving their other half to rebel against the system and because of his partner’s family?
“Why would I leave you?”
He blinks once, then twice, the only sound that could be heard was the familiar music playing throughout the grocery store, it was as if no one was there during the mid-day. Satoru proceeds to look away, “I don’t know. What if you realize that you don’t like me as your soulmate and you followed what the dude did in the movie?” he started to mumble, mouth pressed on a straight line.
“Ah, the whole rich in-laws.” you blinked, “Don’t tell me you’re a son of some huge clan in japan that’s loaded and I’m going to be a disgrace to your family name or something?”
It came out as a joke at first, it really did and you were going to laugh but when you notice the straight face he has on, you realize it was anything but a joke.
“Oh.”
“Yeah, Oh.”
“Aren’t I supposed to be the one asking that question then?”
“What?” He almost half-yelled, eyes wide behind his usual shades that he seemed to wear a lot, “That doesn’t make sense!”
“Neither does your question, Satoru.” You frowned, massaging your temples, “I should be the one asking you that, are you going to leave me?”
“Of course not.” He sputters out.
“Then there goes my answer too.” You replied, huffing out as you grab the sweet wafers on his hand to put into the cart, “You’re very weird.”
“You’re weird.”
“No, you are.”
“You seriously asked me if I’d leave you because of your rich family in the middle of the day.” You deadpanned, inching closer to him to the point where your lips are brushing against his.
“This is unfair.” He huffed, suddenly turning red, “You’re attacking me in broad daylight.”
“Oh dear.” Your beguiling eyes, enjoying his rather embarrassed state, “This isn’t attacking, Satoru.”
Then you closed the distance between you two, his eyes seemed to widen behind his shades at your forward approach, clearly you guys never did PDA. You took this as an opportunity to lick his lower lip so you could slip your tongue in and as he starts getting into it and placing his hand to cup your ass, you pull away with a big smile on your lips, “That’s attacking.” you grinned.
Satoru seemed to have regained his senses quickly after that rather heated public make-out session, he placed his hand on top of his mouth and feigned embarrassment, “My, My, I didn’t think you’d enjoy those types of things in public.” he was back to his normal teasing self.
Well, that seemed to have worked very well.
“Mhm,”
Yet unknown to you those thoughts still lingered in his head, it wasn’t just his family that he was worried about, it was also regarding his job as a jujutsu sorcerer something he has yet to mention, he’s not even sure if you’d believe him it’s a normal occurrence for people like him to die in this occupation and he’s scared that one day, you’ll see your left eye turning back to his eye color with no valid explanation.
Not only that but the amount of people who’d go after you to get to him, he clenched on the shopping cart tightly
“I’m tired.” You cut his thoughts short and Satoru turns to you, unlike him, you weren’t physically active so you tire easily, even joking around that you were a granny in a child’s body, “Can we sit down after this and get some gyudon?”
“Sure Y/N.” he grins, giving you a one-arm hug and kissing your temple.
Third, he’s terrible with kids, period, no questions asked.
Your eyes narrowed to slits as he brought in one of his students named Megumi, the boy is quiet and compared to your giant and teasing soulmate, he’s serious. In fact he was more serious than the tiny pinky of the white-haired man.
“...Are you kidnapping a third grader?”
“He’s one of my students.”
“You don’t even know the first thing of looking after kids.” You pointed out, “And didn’t you mention that you teach high school students?”
“Well,” he drawled on, “It’s kind of a long story but he’s technically a genius.”
You let out a stifling sigh, “You’re impossible.” you mutter, bending down to the small boy’s level, “Would you like something to eat in compensation for him annoying you?”
The boy nods mutely.
“I wasn’t annoying him!” He corrects.
“He looks very annoyed standing next to you.”
“That’s literally what he looks like!”
You roll your eyes in reply and turn to the young boy, handing him a pastry that you had brought earlier. You watched Megumi eat his pastry in front of the television that played some child-friendly show as you let out a soft cough and pour yourself some water
“Are you alright?” Satoru asks, resting his head on your shoulders.
“Yeah,” You replied, “Why’d you ask?”
“You’re looking quite pale these days.”
“Maybe it’s the allergy season, already.” you nonchalantly replied, taking another gulp of water, “You’re terrible with kids, by the way.”
“That’s why I’m a high school teacher, Y/N.”
This connects you to your fourth observation, he’s nonchalant and easy going but he harbors a rather deep worry for you to the point where you wonder if he was really your soulmate or your mother incarnate. Three years into the whole soulmate thing with him, you still couldn’t help but think that he’s doting nature was quite adorable.
You feel like you’re coming down with a cold these days, your head has been throbbing and your cough is worsening. Satoru’s eyes are filled with nothing but worry as he handed you some medication. Your soulmate was now a mother hen and if it were different circumstances, you’d laugh it off.
“We should go to the doctor.” He nagged you once again.
“I’m literally going to sleep it off.” You hoarsely replied, “I’ll be fine, Satoru.”
“You literally sound like you smoked a pack with your voice, are you sure?”
“I am.” You glared, “Don’t sleep-”
Before you could even finish what you were saying, he flops right next to you in the bed, “-I literally told you to not sleep next to me.” you scolded him.
“A mere cold won’t phase me.”
“I swear to god, Gojo Satoru. I’ll kick you out.” He ignores your ministrations and snuggles his head on your neck, his warm breath tickling it, “You’re impossible.”
“You love me.”
“Sadly.”
“Hey.”
“I’m kidding.” you let out a quiet chuckle, looking down at your soulmate and running your hands through his white hair, “I love you very much, you idiot.”
“Hard same.”
“Never mind, I take it back.” you giggle.
And after a rather short playful banter between you two, you find yourself sleeping and snuggling on his long limbs. You think all is well, you really do. That was until you wake up later at three am in the morning with a loud coughing fit. Satoru immediately sits upright and opens your nightlight but what he sees next, scares him more than the curses he has ever encountered.
Your sheets are now stained in blood from the coughing fit that had just happened and you're completely taken aback too, completely breathless.
“Y-Y/N…” He gulps down, quickly taking the sheets away from you, “Let’s go to the hospital now, please?”
“...L/N-san, have you been getting coughing fits before this?” the doctor asks, looking up from your chart. Satoru watches you shake your head as you clench the paws of his jacket, the doctor takes off his glasses, “How about coughs that don’t seem to go away? Getting tired too easily?”
Satoru doesn’t like where this was going, he doesn’t like where this was going at all.
“Um, just some dry coughs and I’ve always been an inactive person.” You quietly replied, contrasting to your usual bright and teasing demeanor, you looked too tired this morning and Satoru just hopes it’s because he dragged you out of bed at four am to get yourself checked asap.
“Y/N-san, has any of your family members been diagnosed with lung cancer?”
The whole room is silent and you could almost hear a pin drop, Satoru feels his knuckles suddenly turn white, “I recalled my okaasan died because of that.” You replied silently and the doctor nods feverishly.
“...Y/N-san...It pains me to say this but the reason you’ve been experiencing this is because of the tumors located in your lungs.” Satoru feels his heart drop when he hears those words, “We have to do further tests to confirm-”
“Do it.” Satoru cuts the old doctor off, his hands are visibly shaking already, he hopes that this was just a misdiagnosis, that this doctor was just a bad one or better yet whatever excuse his mind could make up at that moment, “Do all the tests needed for Y/N, please.”
Fifth, he’s very supportive towards you and your impulsive decisions. If he could join you in it, he would but you usually decide against it.
It’s another quiet night for you as you sit across from your soulmate at the dinner table. You’ve grown awfully thin and your hair was starting to fall off due to the chemoradiation, this day marked the third month since you found out that you have lung cancer just like your mother. Surgery was apparently too risky so the safest option right now was this treatment.
You don’t deny the anxiety eating you up every day, specifically the fear of death, you’re even more worried for Satoru since not only had he been paying for your treatment but he had opt to take care of you, saying that his job would be fine without him since you were going to get better soon anyways.
“Would you still love me if I shaved my hair?” You asked, your voice still quite hoarse.
“You kidding me? I’d still love you even if you turned into a roach.”
You immediately crinkle your nose in disgust, “That’s disgusting.”
“Honest reply.”
Truthfully, the man had been your rock these past three months. You knew how hard it was for him to be happy around you, how he had put on a brave front and remained positive saying that this was just going to be a rough couple of months and you’d be back in no time despite the bleak outlook.
It kept you sane amongst the tragedy.
“I wanna shave my hair.”
“Like right now?”
You nod, “Can we use your electric razor?”
“You want me.” he points to himself, “To cut your hair?”
“I wouldn’t want anyone else to do it.” You grinned.
And that’s how you ended up in your bathroom after dinner, Satoru’s shades on the side and his concentration directly on your scalp. You had literally told him that he just needed to do it the same way as he shaved his beard but he was still scared. Apparently, he had never shaved anyone’s hair before.
“...Okay, Y/N. Here goes…” He proclaimed, switching the razor on. As bits and pieces of your hair fall to the ground, you feel your cheeks getting wet and your shoulders tense, Satoru is quick to notice the switch of emotion and immediately turns the razor off before bending down in front of you, “Woah, woah… Y/N….”
“I-I…” Your lips are quivering as the tears fall faster when you see his pretty eyes staring back at yours, you try to let out a laugh but instead it comes out as a choke sob, “Sorry, this is stupid. I’m literally crying over fucking hair.”
“No, of course not…” He replies, enveloping you in a hug, “Of course not.”
Satoru feels you start to shake in his arms and he knows he should keep his emotions in check, he’s a sorcerer for crying out loud but seeing you break down for the first time in three months had him shaking too, you didn’t deserve all this, fuck, you didn’t deserve any of this at all!
“Would you like me to shave my hair so you’d feel a bit better?” he asks. After recovering from your breakdown, you had asked him to continue shaving your hair because you might as well be done with it.
“Please don’t.” You reply, wiping your tears away, “We’d look like eggs.”
“Cute eggs, you mean.” He corrects, teasing you and trying to cheer you up, this was all he could do and he hates it.
He really hates it.
What good was the title of being the strongest when he couldn’t save you from all of this?
Lastly, if you hadn’t highlighted it enough. He has pretty eyes, contrasting to your dull and boring ones, you always loved how different his eyes are. Sometimes you wondered why he dared to hide them behind his crappy and overused Lennon shades.
“Can I see them?”
Your room is dimly lit as Satoru sleeps next to you on the hospital bed, you were growing weaker and frailer by the day and you could see the toll it took on your soulmate. You were heavily reminded of your father who was sitting right next to your mother on her deathbed.
“See what?” He yawned.
“Your eyes.”
“You’re awfully in love with them, huh?”
“I’ve always been in love with them from the moment I saw it in the mirror.”
Silence envelopes the room with your statement and as requested, he takes the shades off and now you’re greeted by the most beautiful blue eyes that you love to look at in the reflection since you were a child, “Pretty.” You muttered, raising your frail hands slowly to cup his face, “Pretty eyes.”
Satoru takes in a deep breath as he places his hand on top of yours, the silence is heavy. You both know what’s about to come in the next few days, you’re lucky if you even last a night. Yet he doesn’t want to talk about it, he shuts the topic off quickly when you try to even raise it.
“Yeah.” he mumbles, staring at you, “Pretty.”
You let out a quiet laugh, “I doubt it, I’m anything but pretty now.” your voice hoarse, making him lightly squeeze your hands, “Will you be bringing Megumi tomorrow?”
“Yeah, the brat said he saved enough money to get you your favorite pastry.”
“That’s good.” you blinked, “I’m tired.”
Satoru feels his shoulder tense at your words, they were so plain yet at the same time so heavy, “Should I call the doctor?” he asks. You shake your head and just snuggle on his chest.
“No,” You mumbled, inhaling his scent and basking on his presence, “I want your warmth next to me.”
“Y/N?”
“Hm?”
“You know, you’ve always had prettier eyes.”
Yet you don’t reply and he feels your grip on his sweater lessen, he doesn’t even need to see his reflection to know that his left eye has returned back to your (e/c) ones.
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@airybnb ; @hcn421 ; @shinhiromi
#jujutsu kaisen imagines#jjk angst#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen headcanons#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen scenario#jujutsu kaisen fanfiction#jujutsu kaisen gojo#gojo saturo x reader#saturo x y/n#jjk gojo#soulmate aus#pretty eyes
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