#so many reasons to finally start it actually

[whatsk-poppinhomies]

Pairing : Hwang Hyunjin x F!Reader TW : reader is pregnant ; Hyunjin is stressed ; small argument ; reader breaks up with Hyunjin ; Hyunjin regret ; it's mainly angst ; no happy ending ; Word Count : 7.4k A/N : I'm back! Gonna try to write as much as I can before my new job starts!! Request : Anonny : Can you do an angsty Hyunjin Drabble we’re Hyunjin snaps at her because he’s stressed and she’s pregnant but she thinks he snapped because he knows about her pregnancy so she leaves him and he regrets everything and grovels a lot

“Hey baby…” Hyunjin murmured as he walked through the front door, the dark circles under his eyes evident in the bright fluorescent light that hung above the landing. His schedule was grueling nowadays and the jet lag that he experienced had him in so many different time zones you didn’t know how his body was able to handle it. He didn’t even have time to adjust to different sleep schedules before he was being whisked away once again. “Gonna go wash up…” He trudged to the bathroom, the sound of water rushing through the pipes filled the otherwise empty house. 

It was always like this, you barely even talked to him anymore other than the short greeting when he walked through the front door. You knew he loved you though, he just didn’t have the energy to really act on the feeling anymore like he used to. You still loved him too, and you’d be there for him no matter what. There was one small… well… Small right now problem… Well, not actually a problem, but it was something that had you slightly on edge. 

You had found out you were pregnant, and it’s not like you didn’t want to tell Hyunjin, it just felt like there was never a right time to tell him. He was always gone, and when he came home you didn’t want to bother him with something this big when he already had so much to worry about. It had only been 2 weeks since you took the test, and while you weren’t a fan of hiding things like this, you were still in that timeframe where anything could happen… So it would be unnecessary to even tell him right now when anything could go wrong. 

The more you thought about it, it became very evident to you that the trashcan in the bathroom hadn’t needed to be cleared since you took the test. He had been gone for so long, you hadn’t even thought to hide the evidence. It completely slipped your mind, and now you were thinking way too hard, you were panicking. You couldn’t just run in there and take the trash out, he’d question what you were doing. What if he had already seen it? What if he had seen the boxes? What if he looked in the trashcan and saw the positive tests? 

Everything might have been quiet in the house, but your thoughts were so loud, and when the water finally shut off and the shower curtain slid open you had barely heard it. It wasn’t until his damp feet padded across the hardwood floors that you lifted your head and saw him coming closer, a towel hanging around his neck to catch the droplets of water that fell from the ends of his hair. 

He moved right past the couch that you were sitting on and dropped down into the chair on the other side of the room. It’s not like there wasn’t any room right next to you though… It’s like he didn’t want to sit next to you. Did he find out? Was he mad? He seemed alright when he came through the front door, sure, maybe a bit tired, but that wouldn’t make him want to sit on the complete opposite side of the room… right? 

“How was your-” You started, but he let out a loud groan, his fingers coming up to pinch the bridge of his nose. Was he annoyed? Was it because you hadn’t told him? He had to have found out, that’s the only reason you could think of. Your top teeth came down into your bottom lip, a sharp breath shooting in between your teeth as you stared at him. 

“I’m not ready.” He muttered, and while you didn’t let on outwardly, those three words had your stomach twisting into the tightest knots. Your mouth opened, not even to speak, just to breathe, but his eyes rolled and your lips quickly snapped shut. “Just, don’t talk please. I’m not ready. There’s just too much going on.” 

Your head nodded slowly until you were looking straight down at your lap, your fingers twirling around themselves as nervousness and panic completely took over. He found out, he knew, and he didn’t want to know anything about it… He didn’t want anything to do with you or the life growing inside of you right now. He was too busy. “Sorry…” You mumbled, holding your breath to keep yourself from crying right then and there. 

“Maybe I should just stay with the guys tonight…” He proposed, and it’s not like you were going to tell him not to. It’s not like you even had time to try to talk him out of it if you wanted to, he was getting up already, tossing his towel into the hamper next to the washer and then going back to the front door, grabbing his keys off the hook and walking out. Not a goodbye, not an “I love you”... nothing. He just… left. 

///

“It’s just overwhelming being home after so long…” Hyunjin explained to Chan as he fell onto the couch, his hands running over his face as he let out a loud sigh. “And I know she misses me, and I miss her too… I just can’t sleep, I’m not hungry yet and my schedule is so messed up, I don’t want to bother her with all of that.” 

Chans head nodded slowly in agreement, but then he stopped, his eyes narrowed and his eyebrows lowered to cast shadows over his already darkened eyes. “You… did tell her that… right? You told her all of that… Right?” He questioned, and Hyunjins head fell as he let out a dejected sigh. Of course he didn’t tell you that. If he did, you’d just give up more of your time to try to help him. “So you just left… For no reason? And you think that when you return home, everything will be fine?” 

“I’m not stupid, hyung. I know that things won’t be fine.” Hyunjin muttered, letting out an even heavier sigh which turned to a yawn. “But I have another out of country promotion thing coming up, so I’m thinking that I’ll just stay here until I leave for that, and then I’ll have a break when I get back to talk to her. It’ll give me time to get back on a schedule that lines up with hers and I’ll be able to actually be with her.” 

He could read on Chans face that he wasn’t on board with the plan at all, but he didn’t speak a word about it, instead just shaking his head as he pushed himself up off the couch. “If that’s what you think will work, fine. I won’t interfere with your relationship, you know her best. I’m just hoping that you make the right decision, for your sake, and for hers.” There wasn’t much else to say anyway, deep down Hyunjin knew that his decision making was flawed in some way or another, it’s just that he didn’t know what else to do. 

Leaving the way he did left no room for error, the way he left was an error in itself. He might not let on that he knows it was a mistake, but it was, he knew it was. There would undoubtedly be an argument once he did come home, and the time that he was giving the both of you between then and now was mainly to prepare himself for that argument. He hated fighting with you, but being as busy as he always was had him constantly on edge. It’s not like he meant to take it out on you either, he really tried not to, that’s why he left as well. He was just so damn tired. He hoped that you’d understand. 

///

“So you’re… pregnant… and you left? You just walked out?” Your friend asked as you sat in her living room, your eyes burning from the tears that you had cried earlier whilst explaining everything to her. “You’re sure that he knows? Like, 100% sure? This seems like… And I’m not disregarding your feelings at all… But, your hormones are most likely surging and, I don’t want you to make this kind of decision based on a whim… You know?” 

You knew where she was coming from, she always thought more logically than most, and that’s why you had gone to her specifically to talk to her about what was going on. “Why else would he say that? Why else would he just walk out the way that he did? He didn’t even tell me that he loved me… It’s like… Like he realized he doesn’t love me now that he found out I’m having his kid.” And you crumbled once again, a blubbering mess curled up into yourself on her couch, and no amount of back rubs or consolations were going to make you feel any better. “I mean… I know that we never really talked about having children… And he’s been so busy lately… I just didn’t think he’d react like this…” 

She let out a slow breath, she was clearly thinking, but she also knew that right now, you didn’t need realistic thoughts or “what ifs”, you just needed her to be there for you, and that’s what she’d be. “Everything will be okay… I’ll help you no matter what you decide to do.” You fell against her shoulder, letting yourself cry to the point of your eyes feeling so heavy that you could barely keep them open, and you eventually fell asleep. At least in your dreams, this hadn’t happened. Your subconscious mind hadn’t fully come to terms with the events of the day, and in your mind, you and Hyunjin were still happy, and your vivid imagination played out a reality where he and you raised your child together, in a loving home, one where he wasn’t so busy, one where he was actually excited to be a father. 

Upon awakening, you immediately checked your phone. A thin sliver of hope that maybe he had messaged you, maybe he’d want to talk about what had happened and why he reacted the way he did. Maybe he’d apologize, maybe he’d explain things… but there was nothing. There were no calls or texts, hell, you even checked your email just in case… It’s like he walked out and completely forgot that you existed. 

“Sleep well?” Your friend asked as she turned the corner from the kitchen, her head tilted as she watched you look through your phone, and the cheerful smile she had been wearing just a millisecond before faded to a frown as she walked to sit beside you. “Let’s not worry about that, yeah? We can order in tonight, watch some movies, really get your mind off of things?” 

You nodded in agreement, mainly because she was trying so hard, you weren’t going to shoot down her attempts at trying to cheer you up. She was doing the best she could as your friend, and she couldn’t just bring Hyunjin to you or force him to explain… That was something he had to decide to do on his own. 

There was nothing though, nothing that could be done to actually get your mind off of what was happening. You couldn’t stop thinking about the fact that you’d most likely be a single mother, that Hyunjin wanted nothing to do with you or his child. He wasn’t ready, he didn’t have the time to be around for things like that. He was responsible for so many other things, he had so much on his shoulders, how was he possibly supposed to juggle everything that he was already dealing with and being a father on top of that? 

“You pick the movie and I’ll order the food, okay?” She patted your knee after passing you the remote, giving you a smile, but it felt more apologetic. She felt sorry for you. Everyone would pity you… Or maybe they’d pity him. They wouldn’t listen to your side of the story, especially the fans. They’d take his side regardless of what you say. He was perfect, and you had essentially stolen him from them in the first place. They hated you from the beginning, they would find any reason to break you down further. 

Or, maybe they’d be happy that you made this decision. They could go back to their delusional thoughts, their dreams that they’d actually have a chance with him now that you were out of the picture. You didn’t want to deal with all of that though. You didn’t want any of this to be made public, you wanted to disappear. That’s exactly what you’d do… You didn’t need him to message you, you didn’t need an explanation…. It would be better for you and your child to be free of him. Maybe… Hopefully, he’d avoid you long enough and just forget about you, forget about the baby, forget about everything. 

///

“She hasn’t texted you back yet?” Felix asked Hyunjin who was doubled over the kitchen counter, visibly shaking from crying, yet no sound was coming out, not anymore. “Look, I’m sure there’s a reason… What was the last thing you said to her?” Felix, who hadn’t been told of everything that had happened prior to Hyunjins return for his promotions, was just trying to help as much as he could. 

“Nothing… I didn’t say anything to her…” Hyunjin gasped out, finally lifting his head to reveal his eyes that were puffy and red, but underneath the redness was a darker purple from lack of sleep. “She took… Everything. All of her stuff is gone. She left.” And with that reflection came another round of tears. “Chan hyung was right… I know he thought I was stupid… my plan was stupid…” 

Felix was baffled to say the least, and on top of that, quite disappointed in his friend who had spent the last 3 years gushing over how much he loved you and how he couldn’t wait to spend the rest of his life with you. How could Hyunjin have fumbled so badly? “Let me get this straight… You haven’t talked to her at all? What happened?” Now, Felix was no expert on relationships, but he was sure that he could help in some way. There had to be something he could do to help Hyunjin get you back. Things couldn’t be so bad that there was no hope. 

“I left… I walked out… And and… It wasn’t her fault… But I did it wrong. I didn’t say goodbye and I didn’t tell her I loved her…” There was still hope though, it’s not like Hyunjin would have ghosted you while he was gone… It was almost a whole month of traveling. He couldn’t go that long without talking to you. Hell, he couldn’t even go that long without talking about you. “I knew I messed up, and I thought… Maybe a little bit of time would make things better. I thought I’d be able to talk to her when I got back because now I have a break… But she’s gone.” 

“So you just… Nothing? No communication at all…?” Felixs teeth gritted together, all thoughts of being able to help had been thrown out the window as Hyunjin shamefully nodded his head. “So this… this might be fixable still… you know… with a lot of work. A lot of communication and explanations… This could still work.” But even Hyunjin knew that Felix was just trying to take away some of the sting, give him just a bit of false hope so he could at least sleep easier tonight, but none of it would work. Hyunjin knew the mistakes he had made had cost him an entire 3 year relationship. He fucked up, and there was no coming back from it. 

“I’m not stupid, Felix…” The words came out as an exasperated sigh, he didn’t need false hope, he needed you back, and that was the one thing he wasn’t going to get. “I’ve tried to call her, it goes straight to voicemail. My texts won’t even go through. She blocked me. She wants nothing to do with me. I can’t fix things, I don’t even know where she’s at.” He ran his hands rather roughly through his hair, strands getting stuck and yanked out between his fingers, only worrying Felix more. Hyunjin was beyond stressed at this point, he was stressed and depressed, and those two are a very bad combination. 

“How about you just not think about it for a bit. Just… Focus on literally anything else.” At this point Felix was pleading. Seeing Hyunjin like this, although it was solely Hyunjins fault, was devastating and beyond worrisome. He didn’t know what Hyunjin would do, he didn’t know how bad Hyunjin could get, he didn’t even know if this was the worst of it. He didn’t like seeing his best friend like this. 

Hyunjin scoffed, an unamused smirk stretching across his face. “Oh? Focus on something else, like I’ve been doing? That’s the reason I lost her in the first place. I’m tired of having to focus on so much other shit that I can’t even focus on my own girlfriend!” His voice continued to rise in volume and pitch, and now Felix was downright scared. “I lost the love of my life because I put everything else in front of her! I made everything else my priority! You see where that gets me!” 

Felix stumbled back, scared to even attempt to make eye contact at this point. “Look, I get that you’re mad at yourself right now, and that’s fair… But you need to calm down…” Hyunjin wouldn’t do anything to hurt him, he was sure of that, but his hands instinctively moved out in front of him to keep some space between himself and Hyunjin, just in case his words upset Hyunjin even more. “Maybe she needs some time… Maybe she’ll come back to you. You can't just… You can’t be going off like this…”

A laugh, almost maniacal, escaped Hyunjins lips, his head falling back as the sound seemed to vibrate the whole room. “Calm down… Calm down?! How?! How am I supposed to calm down!? Would you stay calm during a situation like this?! If you ruined your entire relationship would you just be calm!?” He continued shouting, and Felix knew that at this point there was no use. He would either descend completely into madness, or he’d come to his senses and realize that he’s acting absolutely crazy right now. “I need to go out, I need a drink or something.” Hyunjin mumbled, and while Felix knew that a drink was the last thing that Hyunjin needed, there was no use trying to stop him, there was no use trying to talk to him, there was no use trying to do anything to help right now. 

///

“You’re in a good mood today. What’s got you so happy?” Your friend asked, noticing that you were smiling at your phone for the last 15 minutes at least. “Did you get a new boyfriend or something?” You whipped your head up long enough to scowl at her, and she laughed lightly as she leaned back against the couch. “Okay, no boyfriend… So, what is it?” 

You turned your phone in her direction and waved it back and forth as you exclaimed. “I got the apartment that I’ve been looking at. It’s affordable and big enough for myself and the baby.” You dropped your hand down to your lap, clicking off your phone and letting out a soft sigh. “I’ll miss staying with you though… You’ll have to visit me a lot.” 

She snorted loudly, leaning forward and reaching over to grab your hand. “I know that you felt like you needed to do this, but I wouldn’t have minded you staying here. The company was nice…” The corners of your mouth pulled down into a frown at the sentiment, it was too late to go back now that you had already agreed and the landlord was in the process of getting the leasing papers. “Hey, no pouting. I’ll be over your place so much that it’ll be like I live there.” 

Maybe it was the hormones that had tears prickling at the corners of your eyes, or maybe it was just the fact that you had become so comfortable staying at your friend's apartment that you know how you’d actually do this on your own. Now you wouldn’t have anyone, not Hyunjin, and not even her. “Promise?” You whimpered, and a sympathetic smile spread across her face as she dabbed at your tears with the sleeve of her hoodie. 

“I promise. I’m gonna be like the second mom that the baby never asked for.” You laughed weakly at the joke before finally taking a deep breath and getting up, your friend moving right alongside you. “So when is the next appointment? I wanna know what our baby is gonna be, hmm!” You rolled your eyes, but it felt nice to hear someone, anyone, call the baby ours and not just yours… 

“Next week…” You murmured as you walked into the kitchen to grab a drink and she followed right behind you. “Is it okay to be scared? I mean… Once I find out… that makes it more real. I still feel alone… And I know that you’re here and I’m so happy that you are… I don’t know what I would have done without you here… But he’s… I still have dreams about him… What it would be like to have him as a part of the baby’s life.” 

“That’s normal…” She reassured you, stepping around the counter to rub your back in soothing circles. “Just because you got rid of him doesn’t mean that your heart or your mind can or will get rid of him. He’s the father of that baby, regardless of whether he wants to act the part or not, and you won’t forget that.” And once again you were sniffling, your head falling against her shoulder as she consoled you. She put up with a lot for you, and for that you felt awful, even if she said she didn’t mind. You truly didn’t know what you’d do without her. 

///

Hyunjin had slowly begun to get back to his normal routine, although he still missed you, at least during the day he was able to act like he was okay. The same couldn’t be said about nighttime though, he’d lay in bed scrolling through his pictures of you and just cry. 6 months was a long time to be away from someone, and most people would think that it was enough time to get over someone… But it was hard to get over a person if that person was the one that you were in love with. 

Daylight hours though, he was the Hyunjin that everyone knew and loved. The only thing that was different was that he didn’t talk about you anymore, and it’s not that he didn’t try to, it’s just that the guys would stop him before he could even get a word out. 

It had been weeks now since he had last tried to even bring you up, and all of the guys really thought they were beginning to get somewhere. Sure, they’d still hear him crying at night, but they were really hoping that soon he’d be able to move on, maybe not to another girl, but move on from his mistakes, use them as a lesson in the future for what not to do. 

“We should go to the cafe since we’ve got a break, yeah?” Felix suggested as he sat against the mirrored wall beside Hyunjin in the practice room. “I think we deserve to reward ourselves after all of our practice. Plus, I know your ass would never turn down an iced americano, so let’s go.” Hyunjin chuckled as he and Felix both got up off the floor, heading to the door. 

“We should go to my favorite place, they’ve got the best pastries and I’m so hungry.” Felix nodded along to the suggestion, anything to make Hyunjin happy and keep him happy. What both of the guys didn’t know though, was that Hyunjins favorite cafe had become your favorite cafe as well. It’s not like you could help the cravings that seemed to come almost overnight the further along you got in your pregnancy. 

The walk was short, it was within a block of the building, and maybe that’s why Hyunjin had come to like it so much. It wasn’t just the taste of the beverages and the treats, it was the convenience of it as well. Not just that, but there were memories there, memories that he tried to keep at the back of his mind, but just the sight of the familiar storefront sign had the memories flooding in. He couldn’t help but think back on all the days that he’d meet you there during your lunch breaks, holding hands with you across the table as you both talked about your days. Where did it all go wrong? 

“Oh look!” Felix announced, breaking the silence of the otherwise quiet walk. “It must be the anniversary of the cafe opening or something. They’ve got balloons all out front.” Hyunjins eyes were drawn to the pink and white orbs that floated in the front of the shop. Over the five years that he had been going there, he had never seen them do anything like that before for anniversaries, but maybe this one was important. 

“That’s cute… Maybe they’ll have some specials or something.” Hyunjin joked, his pace picking up slightly at the thought of a discounted treat. Things were starting to get a little weird now though as he and Felix got closer. There had never been so many cars parked out front of the cafe at once, and as he glanced through the window, he could see pink and white streamers hanging from the ceiling. “Is someone having a party?” He questioned, and Felix peaked in as well, but ultimately shrugged his shoulders. 

“I’m sure they’re not using the whole cafe, come on. We can probably still get a seat.” Felix pushed through the door, the chime above the door ringing out and letting the employees and everyone else in the cafe know they were there. “Looks like a baby shower… I’ve never known of people having baby showers at cafes… That’s new.” He mused, pointing to the banner that hung above the counter. 

“Is it just me… or did it get like… really awkward in here…” Hyunjin whispered, noticing the way the entire cafe seemed to go silent upon their entrance. He couldn’t help but feel antsy under the gazes of so many people. “Maybe we should just go back after we order…” 

“Or it could just be because we’re famous… Come on… Don’t make me walk back yet. My feet are tired.” Felix playfully whined, and Hyunjin relented. He was sure that Felix was right, sometimes it was easy to forget that he was an idol, especially when he was out doing normal things like getting coffee with his best friend. “Maybe if the parents know of us, they’ll ask us to take pictures. I wouldn’t mind doing that. That would be so cool actually.” Felix continued to think out loud after ordering the drinks and the pastries, Hyunjin following along as they walked to a table closer to the back. 

By that time, it seemed like the people that had already been there for the baby shower were talking amongst themselves, quieter now, and Hyunjin was trying so hard not to be pessimistic, he was trying to truly believe what Felix had said, but there was just this feeling in his stomach that these people weren’t shocked or in awe at the fact that the two of them had shown up. They were angry. Then, the chime above the door rang out, and a unified chorus of “surprise” was cheered. That’s when Felix almost choked on his drink, his eyes widening as he set his eyes upon the new “customer”. 

“There is no fucking way…” Felix muttered, and it’s not like he’d be able to keep Hyunjin from looking, it’s not like they wouldn’t pass by the party anyway on the way out. If something were to happen, it was bound to happen, regardless of how much Felix tried to keep it from happening, so he decided not to try at all. All he could do was hold his breath as he watched Hyunjin turn around in his seat and then completely freeze when his eyes landed on you. 

It wasn’t just you though, there was someone else… Although they weren’t visible right now, they weren’t standing beside you… They were growing inside of you. You had to be 6… maybe 7 months pregnant by now… And it was all starting to make sense to Hyunjin now… At least in his head. That’s why you left. You had gotten pregnant by someone else while he was away, that had to be the reason. What other reason was there for you to just leave the way you did without saying a single word. This whole time he had thought that it had been his fault… But you had cheated on him. You cheated and you didn’t even have the common decency to tell him before you left. 

“Wow! Congratulations!” Hyunjin cheered snarkily as he loudly pushed his chair back and got up, clapping his hands together so hard that it almost echoed off the walls. “Crazy that of all places I finally get to see you again, it’s at your baby shower! Is that why you left, huh? You just couldn’t stay faithful while I was away and you managed to get knocked up! Where’s the father? Where is he, hmm!? I just wanna talk to him!” His voice started rising in pitch and getting louder and louder, something that Felix had seen before, and even though he was upset as well, he didn’t want Hyunjin to do something that he might end up regretting. 

“What are you talking about?” You managed to say through tears and sobs, your arms seeming to instinctively wrap around your stomach to protect it from Hyunjins anger. “Stop trying to act so innocent just because you’re out in public! Or did you not even tell Felix?! Or maybe you just conveniently forgot that you’re the one that walked out on me because you found out I was pregnant and you didn’t want to deal with it!” 

“WHAT?!” Both Hyunjin and Felix said the word at the same time, both of their expressions mirrored right beside each other as they stared at you, their mouths agape and their eyes so wide it looked like they might fall out. “Wait… Just.. Hold on a second!” Hyunjin stammered, his arms going up in defense as everyone in the room started to get more angry. “You’re… You’re saying… The baby is mine?!” 

You let out a sigh of disbelief, your hand running shakily through your hair, but Hyunjin couldn’t seem to take his eyes off your stomach that was rounded out, like a volleyball was placed under your shirt. It’s not like he had never seen a pregnant woman before, but to see the woman that he was head over heels in love with, pregnant… it was something that he couldn’t wrap his mind around, especially now that he knew the baby was his. “I just want to go… I want to go home…” You whimpered to your best friend who had her arm wrapped protectively around your waist. 

“No! No wait!” Hyunjin practically screamed when you started to turn around, his hand reaching out to grab your upper arm and keep you from moving any further. “Why didn’t you tell me? Why would you just walk out? Were you just going to… hide it… from me?” His voice got softer, wavering a little as his eyes glassed over, finally looking at you, and the prominent frown on your face had his heart aching even more. 

“Stop pretending… Stop… Hyunjin, you already knew.” The words came out as a single breath, exhausted already from the back and forth of it all. “You didn’t have to tell me… I knew why you left. You saw the test in the bin… You didn’t even want to talk about it. You left… You didn’t tell me you loved me, and it doesn’t matter how long it’s been… It still hurts…” You never turned around to face him, but he didn’t need to see your face to know that you were holding your breath, your cheeks slightly puffed out, something that he always found to be adorable, but now that it was because of him, he was devastated. You didn’t want him to see you cry, you didn’t want him to hear that you were choked up, but he knew… 

It wasn’t making sense though. “Y/N…” He whispered your name, stepping closer, feeling the glares of everyone around him, but it didn’t stop him. He wouldn’t hesitate. Even if you didn’t want to get back with him, even if nothing was fixed by this conversation… “I would never leave… Not because of this. If I knew… I would have sat down and talked to you about it… I would have… I would have done things differently. I was stupid, but not because I found out you were pregnant. I was stupid because I was stressed, I was so tired from work and… I thought that I had made a mistake before… But now I can see how big that mistake was. I didn’t just lose you… I lost you and… and my baby…” He needed you to know that everything, every thought that had been filling your head about what you thought had happened, that it was wrong. 

Even still, you didn’t turn around, but your shoulders slumped and he could see the deep breath that you took when they raised back up. “You didn’t even call me… I tried to call you, but you didn’t answer. You don’t know the hell that I went through… To try to get over you… And I still haven’t. I don’t think I ever will because… I’ll always have her as a constant reminder of you… And I hate that, but I’d never hate her for being born by a father who couldn’t have cared less.” 

Those words hurt, they hurt more than anything else you had said, because you truly thought that low of him. “You think I don’t care?” He questioned, and you finally turned around, your mascara running down your cheeks with every tear that spilled over, and you simply nodded. “You’re wrong… I care more than you know. I can’t sleep at night… Because I fucked up so bad… And now I have… I have a daughter…” His voice broke, his head falling back and his adams apple bobbing as he swallowed thickly, trying to remove the lump from his throat. “Now that I know… I don’t… What am I supposed to do? I’m not just going to… Move on and… And act like I don’t have a child… Like I’m not still in love with you…” 

“Hyunjin stop…” You muttered, your head shaking as your eyes dropped to the ground. “What do you think saying all this is going to do, huh? If it wasn’t for Chae… I don’t know what I would have done. I would have had to do all this by myself… Because… Because fine, you didn’t know I was pregnant… But you still walked out on me. You put your job before me, above me… You always have…” 

“I know…” Hyunjins head solemnly nodded, you were right, it had been one of the constant arguments that the two of you would have been he still had you, but he had been too blind to see that it would be his biggest downfall. “I know I did, and I regret it, and I’ll regret it even more now. I’ve changed though… And I don’t know what’s going to happen, but I know what I want to happen. I want to be a part of her life… Whether what I want happens or not… Can I at least have that…?” 

///

“So… You’re still single… I’m still single… I don’t know what you’re holding off for…” Hyunjin teased as he helped you hang the banner across the wall. “We’re great at coparenting… I mean, can you imagine what it would be like if we were one unit? We’d be unstoppable. We’d be the coolest parents ever! Not to mention, the hottest parents at school pickup when she’s older.” 

You rolled your eyes. He always managed to find a way to have some sort of variation of the same conversation every single time he came over. He was relentless. “Mm… Don’t fix what’s not broken, haven’t you heard that saying before?” You chimed, stretching up on your toes to try to even out the banner that he seemed to put just high enough for you not to reach on purpose. He stepped behind you, his breath hitting your neck and sending shivers down your spine as he grabbed your end and hung it for you. “You’re such a dork…” You mumbled as you turned around, your breath catching in your throat when you realized just how close his face was to yours. 

“And I’m once again asking if I could be your dork… again…” He smiled hopefully, his head tilted to the side, and although you had admitted to yourself multiple times already that you still loved him, that he was the only man that you’d ever be able to love, that you wanted nothing more than to get back with him… There was always going to be that part of you that worried about him going back to the way he used to be. Going through it once was enough, and you had come to terms that yeah, maybe part of it was your fault for jumping to conclusions and leaving the way you had, but he had been in the wrong as well, and you refused to go through that again, especially now that you had a child to protect as well. 

“But you are my dork…” His eyes lit up momentarily, and you giggled lightly, taking the momentary lapse of attention as a way to slip away. “I still have to put up with your antics almost daily, and you’re over my apartment every day.” He was following you around now as you straightened the decorations that had already been resituated a million times today. “Did you get the cake?” You turned to look at him, his pursed lips and the already guilty look on his face had you groaning loudly. 

“Calm down, baby.” He cooed, and you hated how much you missed hearing him call you that. “I already got it, it’s in the fridge. Have more faith in me… I’m not an absolute pabo.” Your lips pulled into a straight line as you stared at him, but when he remained silent you snorted loudly. “What? What?! Would a pabo make such a beautiful, intelligent, silly, baby girl? Hmm? Would he?” 

“Yes, yes he would.” You retorted with a giggle. “Because the pabo is very handsome, and very silly. She got her smarts from me though.” His lips pulled down into an overly dramatic pout and you playfully pushed against his chest as you shook your head. “Let me take credit for her intelligence, she’s only pretty and silly because you’re her dad. Luckily she looks a lot like you. Although we’re gonna have our work cut out for ourselves when she gets to school.” 

You went to step around him, but his hands landed on your hips, stopping you from any further as he looked you in your eyes, his gaze becoming more serious. “You’re beautiful…” Everything that came out of his mouth before this could have been taken as a joke, and maybe it was all meant to be taken as a joke, but the light tone that he had been carrying the whole afternoon was gone now. “You’re so beautiful, so smart, so perfect and… and every single day I wonder if it’s going to be the last chance I have to even try to get you back… but until that day comes, I’m going to keep trying because if I’m not with you, I don’t want to be with anyone.” He took a deep breath, his arms dropping to his sides as he took a step back. “But if you ever do find someone else… Can you give me a heads up, just so I can prepare myself for the heartbreak of seeing the love of my life with some other man… Please.” 

“You’re so dramatic…” You muttered, taking a step to close the space that he made between the two of you. “You don’t have to worry about that ever happening… There’s no one that can ever make me feel the way you did…” Hesitantly, you reached out to grab his hands, your thumbs brushing along his knuckles. “I’ll never want anyone but you.” Was it really smart to be admitting these things to him? Probably not. Who knew what would happen now that he knew, and you still weren’t ready for anything with him, at least not anything where it felt like your entire life was on the line. “You’re everything to me… and-“ 

His hands pulled away from yours, and for the split second where you couldn’t feel his touch, you panicked. Was he mad at you? No… His hands moved to cup your cheeks as he placed the softest, sweetest, most bittersweet kiss to your lips. It was everything, the sparks once again unleashed in the pits of your stomach just like the first kiss all over again. “You don’t have to explain… I know that you’re not ready… I’m just happy to hear that there’s no one else. And I’ll wait, I’ll keep waiting until you think that I’m deserving enough to be with you again.” His thumbs brushed your cheek before his hand slipped to the back of your head, his fingers tangling in your hair as his forehead rested against yours. “I love you though, only you, it’ll only ever be you…” 

“The birthday girl has arrived!” Changbin announced as him and the rest of the guys walked through the front door, your daughter waddling in infront of them all, her tiny feet carrying her fast over to where you and Hyunjin stood, her tiny hands grabbing at the air in front of her until she reached the both of you. “Are we… interrupting?” Changbin questioned, eyeing you and Hyunjin suspiciously, but you both shook your heads, and you quickly wiped the few tears that had fallen before giving the guys a smile. 

“Nope, you’re just in time!” You clapped your hands together, taking a deep breath to calm your nerves and looking around. Everything was perfect. “Thanks for watching her while we decorated. Was she good?” The guys all nodded, but they still looked between you and Hyunjin, the assumptions and suspicions that they had were obvious. You were just glad that at the end of the day, Hyunjin would be the one faced with the questions, not you. 

“Ah! Look at my big girl! Dada missed you bunches!” Hyunjin squealed as he scooped up his daughter, spinning around with her as he peppered kisses across her face, eliciting a chorus of giggles to pour out. “Do you like? Is it pretty?” He asked as he pointed at all the decorations, walking over to all the places she pointed to and letting her grab at the balloons and the streamers. 

Your heart swelled whenever you watched him with your daughter. He was a great father, he was a wonderful boyfriend when he wanted to be, and you wished that you could get rid of all the doubt and fears and hesitations that you had about him. He truly was perfect, he’s everything that you wanted. He said that he’d wait, but was it fair to keep him waiting? You didn’t even know how long it would take… Maybe someday… Someday soon… You’d be able to give him the answer he wanted, the answer that you want… But for now… For now you both could be happy like this, and for today, you’d let yourselves forget about everything and focus on your daughter and celebrate her 2nd birthday together, as parents, as a family, surrounded by all the people she loves and all the people that love her. 

Perm Taglist :

@whatudowhennooneseesyou @duchesskaren @mytherapisttoldmenotto @lovesunshinefelix @moon0fthenight @kurolils @maruskz @hello-2-u-from-me @mrswolfiechan @bunnychangbin

@his-angell @if-spearb @yomomma104 @lanatheawesome @facelesswrittes @grannyindehouse @cutie-wooyo @felixmainacc @syuuji @jiisungllvr @yukichan67

@randomwimp @silentreadersthings @cutiespaghetti @furiousheartpoetry @lixpixstix

@felixluvr915 @wordsofkpop @kayleigh-28 @szkstay @spnwinchestersd @fleatree @yehsehneeah @vampcharxter @iloveksmohsomuch @lvlnijiro @neteyamsmate4life @futuristicpalacegardenpsychic @delululi @insertsomethingaboutanimehere @karlitaburrito @laylasbunbunny @chimicurri-a @bandolls

@syuuji @moonlight-the-writer @smutdumpskz @extrhotjne @manuosorioh @yeonjunsfox @jazziwritesthings @itshannjisung

#stray kids #skz #skz x reader #skz x you #stray kids x reader #stray kids x you #skz headcanons #skz imagines #skz scenarios #skz drabbles #skz fic #skz angst #stray kids imagines #stray kids headcanons #stray kids scenarios #stray kids drabbles #stray kids fic #stray kids angst #hwang hyunjin #hyunjin #hwang hyunjin x you #hwang hyunjin x reader #hyunjin x you #hyunjin x reader #hyunjin imagines #hyunjin headcanons #hyunjin scenarios #hyunjin drabble #hyunjin drabbles #hyunjin fic

[essektheylyss]

One thing that I feel is really interesting and often forgotten about Essek is that fundamentally, his characterization has been from the start based upon his desperation for external perspectives and connection, which, along with much of his narrative and mechanical positioning, means that he actually has an extraordinary and almost (but not actually, as I'll show) counterintuitive capacity for both growth and trust.

(Buckle in. This is a long one.)

In particular, I would argue, knowing now that many places where the plot touches Ludinus have long been marked for connecting back into the current plot, that he was quite possibly built as a prime candidate for radicalization by the Ruby Vanguard. He felt isolated from his culture, he was desperate for other connection, and he was certainly of the type to believe he was too smart to be drawn into such a thing, given his initial belief that he could control the situation and the fallout. If things had gone any other way, he easily could've been on the other side by now.

As such, he has been hallmarked by being fairly open to suggestion, perhaps for this reason, but the thing about that kind of trait is that it is both how people are radicalized and deradicalized. This is certainly true of Essek, who experienced genuine kindness and quite frankly strangeness from the Nein and was able to move from the isolation the Assembly had engendered to meaningful and genuine connection, largely propelled by his own internal reflection. By the time Nein are aware of his crimes, he's already begun to express regret to an extent and, furthermore, doubt in the Assembly, including explicitly drawing a line against Ludinus, even in a position where he was on his own and probably quite vulnerable.

Similarly, when the Nein reach the Vurmas Outpost some weeks later, he has moved from regret for the position he's ended up carrying a heavy remorse. This makes sense! He's fairly introspective, seems used to spending a lot of time in his own head, and was left with plenty to mull over. It's not some kind of retcon for him to have progressed well past where the Nein left him; it just means he's an active participant in the world who has done his own work in the meantime.

This is another interesting aspect to him. I've talked about this a bit before but I cannot find the post so I'll recap here: antagonists in D&D have significantly more agency than allied NPCs. Antagonists are active forces, against which the party is meant to struggle; allies are meant to support the PCs, which means they tend to be more passive in both their actions and their character growth. Essek was both built as an antagonist, in a position that gives him significant agency, and also was then given significant opportunity to grow specifically to act as a narrative mirror for Caleb's arc. Even when he becomes a more traditional D&D ally, he still retains much of that, though he occupies a supporting role.

I believe that this is especially true because of the nature of Caleb's arc, which I've already written on; the tl;dr of this post is that Caleb is both convinced that he is permanently ruined and also desperate to prove that change is possible. Essek is that proof, because he is simply the character in a position to do so. But this also means that his propensity for introspection and openness is accentuated! He has to do the legwork on his own, for the most part, because that's where he is in the meantime.

But he still ends the campaign necessarily constricted; he is under significant scrutiny, he's at risk from the Assembly, and he goes on the run fairly soon after the story ends. He spends most of the final arc anxious and paranoid, which is valid given the crushing reality of his situation. It would be very easy to extrapolate that seven years into this reality, he would be insular, closed off, and suspicious of strangers, even in spite of the lessons he's learned from the Nein and their long term exposure.

So seeing his openness and lightness now is surprising, but at the same time, given this combination of factors in his position in the narrative over time and his defining traits, it's not by any means unreasonable.

But one thing that I found so delightful is how much trust he exhibits, which is obviously a wild thing to say about Essek in particular, given much of what he learns is both earning and offering trust, which was something he says explicitly in 2x124 that he's never really experienced: "I've never really been trusted and so I did not trust." It makes up much of the progression of his relationship with Caleb, and the trust that he is offered by the Nein in walking off the ship is the impetus he needs to grow.

But I think it's easy to talk about trust when it comes to people who have proven themselves to you or to whom you've ingratiated yourself, and that's really the most we can say about Essek by the time he leaves the Blooming Grove. There is this sense in a lot of discussion of trust (not solely in this fandom) that it is only related to either naivete or love, but there's far more to it. Trust at its best is deliberate—cultivating an openness to the world at large is a great way to combat cynicism and beget connection instead. It allows a person to maintain curiosity and be open to experience, but it can be incredibly difficult to hold onto.

It is clear that the Essek we meet now is a very pointedly and intentionally trusting individual. He trusts Caleb and by extension Caleb's trust in Keyleth, as he shows up and picks up a group of strangers from a foreign military encampment and walks in without issue. He trusts the Hells to follow his lead moving through Zadash and to exhibit enough discretion so as to avoid bringing suspicion upon all of them. He trusts that Astrid will respond well to his entrance, but he also trusts himself and the Hells enough to execute a back-up plan in the case that she doesn't. In the end, he even trusts them enough to give them his name and identity.

He doesn't scan as someone who has spent half a dozen years living like a prey animal, afraid of any shadow he runs across in an alley, withdrawn into himself and an insular family, which would've been an easy route for him to take. He scans as someone who has learned the kind of trust borne of learned confidence and a trained eye for good will and kindness, which are crucial weapons one would need for staving off cynicism in his circumstances—as if he has survived thanks more to connection and kindness than paranoia and isolation. (If we want to be saccharine about it, he scans quite poignantly as a member of the Mighty Nein.)

So it is easy to imagine this trust and openness as a natural progression of his initial search for perspectives external to his own cultural knowledge. Though he makes those first connections with the Assembly to try to vindicate his personal hypotheses, he finds in them exposure to the deepest corruption among Exandrian mortals, which could've—and did, for a time—turned him further down that same dark path.

But it's also this same openness to exposure from the wider world that allows the Nein to influence him for the better, and in spite of the challenges he's certainly faced simply surviving over the past seven years, he seems to have held onto this openness enough to move through the world with self-assurance and a willingness to extend the kinds of trust and good will that he has been shown.

(I would be remiss not to mention that I was reminded about my thoughts on this by this lovely post from sky-scribbles and their use in the tags of 'light' to describe Essek's demeanor this episode, which is really such an apt word for it.)

#something something hope is a weapon hope is a discipline hope is a garden to cultivate!!! #HE'S SO GOOD HE IS TRULY EXEMPLAR OF THE WHOLE PHILOSOPHY OF THE NEIN AND I DO NOT THINK THAT'S AN ACCIDENT #truly just like. enormous proponent of letting trust and curiosity into your heart regardless of the horrors. #it's hard and it makes you more vulnerable and sometimes it hurts so so much but it will also save your fucking life! #cr spoilers #critical role #essek thelyss #cr meta #I was gonna apologize for the length but I'm not sorry. I'm also not sorry for being insane about him but he's so special to me. #head in my hands he's so GOOD HE'S BEST BOI! GUIDING LIGHT NORTH STAR!!! LOOK AT HIM!!! #also truly if i had two nickels for a span of time with no essek sightings where I wrote a lot of fic #with deliberate personal acknowledgment that I was writing some pretty maximal arcs for him in terms of character growth #and then end up getting essek for half an episode and having to go OH WE'RE GOING THAT FAR ACTUALLY. FUCKING INCREDIBLE. #yanno. two nickels. but good lord I am thriving that it's happened twice #augh this is ONE of the pieces I need to write this week. we're not gonna talk about it

[pin-k-ink]

mania // hinata shoyo

tw ⇢ childhood friends to lovers, possessive!hinata, borderline obsessive behavior, teasing, squirting, cunnilingus, manhandling, dirty talk, unprotected sex, grinding, hinata takes a picture of you while you’re covered in cum

wc ⇢ 8.5k

The blaring of your alarm jolted you awake, the last wisps of a strange dream quickly dissipating. Groaning, you reached over to silence the incessant beeping. Another day, another monotonous routine to slog through.

As you raised yourself up on your elbows, you noticed a moving truck parked outside your window. Huh, someone new must be moving into the apartment next door that had been vacant for months. You supposed you should introduce yourself as the neighbor at some point.

You watched with detached interest as a figure emerged from the truck, hoisting a box into their arms with ease despite its considerable size. They wore a baseball cap pulled low, shielding most of their face from view. Suddenly, the person paused, turning to look in your direction. Even obscured by the cap's brim, you registered a pair of distinctly familiar bright eyes that sparked an old warmth within you.

Could it be...? No, it couldn't possibly...

As if hearing your internal questioning, the figure reached up with their free hand to remove the cap. Instantly, you gasped softly in recognition at the sunlight catching on his tousled orange locks and the gentle, friendly features - those of your childhood friend and neighbor Hinata Shoyo whom you hadn't seen in nearly a decade since his family moved away.

But as you drank in the rest of him, you realized this was not the Hinata you remembered. His compact frame had broadened substantially into toned, powerful muscles that rippled beneath his shirt as he moved. Faint tan lines gave a glimpse of the athlete's build lying underneath. Your gaze lingered perhaps a moment too long, feasting on the sight.

It was then that a myriad of conflicting emotions welled up - shock at his unexpected return after so many years, happiness to see your dear friend again, but also a growing flutter of something else in the pit of your stomach you couldn't quite identify. The tiny, energetic boy you fondly recalled was gone, unmistakably.

When Hinata's penetrating stare met yours once more, the intensity simmering there rattled you to your core. It was as if he were seeing straight through you, into you, assessing your reaction to his transformation in minute detail. You looked away sharply, heat creeping up your neck as your heartbeat quickened for reasons you didn't fully understand.

One thing was for certain - the reunion with your long lost friend was about to make your life anything but monotonous...

You stood there, still trying to process that the tall, chiseled man before you was actually little Hinata Shoyo, when he suddenly broke into a blinding smile and started bounding towards your door. Before you could even react, your front door burst open and powerful arms were enveloping you in a bone-crushing hug.

"(Y/N)! I can't believe it's really you!" Hinata's deep voice reverberated through you.

As he squeezed you tight against his firm body, his large hands splayed across your back, one slipping perhaps a little too low without meaning to. You gasped at the unbidden thrill the innocent contact sent through you. Get a grip! This was your childhood friend, for god's sake.

Pulling back finally, you drank in Hinata's features again up close - the sharpened jawline, intense eyes that seemed to glitter with unrestrained joy and something else you couldn't quite place, kiss-swollen lips quirked into a roguish grin.

"Shoyo! I...wow, you've really..." Your voice trailed off as heat flooded your cheeks.

His grin widened mischievously, as if he knew exactly what you were flustered about. "Yeah, I've changed a bit since we were kids, huh? The big leagues will do that."

There was a self-assured cockiness there that the old Hinata definitely lacked. His hands were still planted firmly on you, his thumbs tracing maddeningly slow circles against your sides that had you struggling not to squirm.

"Hey, why don't you come over in a bit after I get settled?" he asked, that molten gaze boring into you. "We have a decade to catch up on, after all."

You couldn't be imagined the darker undercurrent, the subtle heat behind his words and body language. This reunited friend dynamic was quickly veering into dangerous territory. Still, you found yourself nodding dumbly in agreement before he released you finally.

As you watched Hinata retreat back towards the moving truck, you realized with a start that he moved with the same fiery confidence and intensity he always radiated on the court - except this time, it was directed solely at you. A shiver ran down your spine at the implications.

What had once been an innocent reunion between childhood friends was rapidly becoming anything but. You didn't have the slightest clue just how obsessively Hinata's desires had been simmering underneath the surface for you all these years.

A few hours later, you found yourself standing at Hinata's door, your nerves a bundled mess of anticipation and trepidation. You had changed outfits twice, uncertain why you felt the need to put in any extra effort for hanging out with an old friend. But the simmering tension from earlier had you feeling uncharacteristically self-conscious.

Taking a steadying breath, you rapped your knuckles against the door. It opened almost immediately, as if Hinata had been waiting right on the other side. He greeted you with that same earth-shatteringly warm smile and ushered you inside.

"Make yourself at home! I just put the kettle on for some tea if you'd like."

You nodded, drinking in the neat but still half-unpacked surroundings. Pictures were already hung up - most showcasing Hinata's impressive volleyball accolades, but a few candid shots of the two of you together as kids. A pang of nostalgia hit you seeing your grinning young selves, so blissfully ignorant of what the years would bring.

"Those were the days, huh?" Hinata's deep voice rumbled beside your ear, sending a shiver down your spine.

You jumped slightly, not realizing how close he had gotten without you noticing. He was radiating warmth like a furnace, his clean, crisp scent enveloping you and cranking up your pulse.

"Y-yeah, I can't believe how long it's been," you managed, hating how flustered you sounded.

Hinata held your gaze a beat too long, as if studying you, before thankfully the tea kettle's whistle pierced the tension. He flashed you another knee-weakening grin before brushing past you towards the kitchen, his arm grazing your side ever so lightly.

You sank onto the couch, trying to collect yourself as Hinata pottered about preparing the tea, seemingly oblivious to the effect he was having on you. This was just Hinata, your innocent best friend growing up...right? You had to be misreading the heated looks, the weighted silences, the proximity.

By the time he returned with two steaming mugs, placing one in your shaking hands, you had mostly regained your composure. Hinata took a seat beside you, his broad shoulders bumping against yours in the tight quarters. The smell of his intoxicating cologne clouded your senses again.

"So..." He took a long sip, those hauntingly amber eyes flickering over you from beneath his lashes. "What did I miss while I was gone?"

And so the two of you fell back into familiar banter and catching up, the years seeming to slip away with every laugh and anecdote shared. But you couldn't shake the feeling there was an underlying current of tension just beneath the surface - a raging storm of want and obsession Hinata could barely contain, no matter how friendly his words.

He hung on your every word, body angled towards you eagerly as you recounted pieces of your life since he'd been gone. You tried not to stare too openly at the way his toned forearms flexed as he gesticulated or how his shirt stretched deliciously across his muscular chest with each breath. This was torture in the sweetest way.

At one point, Hinata reached over to tuck a stray strand of hair behind your ear, his fingers lingering a beat too long and sending sparks ricocheting through you. His gaze had darkened an unmistakable few shades, pupils blown wide. You realized with a start your faces were mere inches apart, close enough for you to taste the lingering tea on his lips if you just...

The afternoon drifted by in a warm haze as you and Hinata continued catching up, swapping stories and reminiscing about old times. With each anecdote and laugh shared, you felt the lingering awkwardness dissipate as the familiar comfort and ease of your childhood friendship reasserted itself.

"Oh my god, do you remember the time we tried to camp out in your backyard?" Hinata chuckled, his eyes crinkling in that achingly nostalgic way. "We didn't even make it past 10 pm before you were crying because you thought you heard a bear!"

You gasped in mock indignation, swatting his arm. "I was 8 years old! Of course I was terrified! You're the one who insisted we could survive in the wilderness by ourselves."

"Hey, I still maintain we were doing pretty well until your dad came out and dragged us inside," he countered with a smirk.

Shaking your head at the memory, you couldn't stop the fond smile from stretching across your face. Those careless days of wandering the neighborhood and dreaming up adventures seemed like an entire lifetime ago now. An unexpected pang of wistfulness tugged at your heart seeing how much had changed - how much Hinata himself had changed into this ruggedly handsome man oozing quiet confidence.

As if reading your melancholic turn of thought, Hinata's expression softened almost imperceptibly. Reaching out, his thumb gently grazed your cheek, lingering on the cusp of something more intimate. You fought the urge to turn into his touch, to chase that fleeting connection.

"I missed you, you know," he murmured, molten eyes roving your features as if mapping every curve, every laugh line. "After we moved away, not a day went by I didn't think about you."

The raw honesty, the undisguised yearning in his voice made your breath hitch in your throat. What did he mean by that? You wanted to ask, suddenly hyperaware of the searing heat building between your bodies where your legs were pressed together on the couch.

Before you could find your words, Hinata dropped his hand, the moment breaking. He flashed you a brilliant smile, but you could have sworn you detected a fleeting look of frustration, of wanting more. But the instant was gone in a blink.

"Anyway," he said, clearing his throat. "Tell me more about what you've been up to recently! Any relationships I need to intimidate the guy over?"

And just like that, you found yourself diverted onto a new conversational path, the flirtatious tension fizzling out into easy banter once more. But you couldn't quite shake the feeling that something deeper, something hungrier lurked behind Hinata's every glance, every casual brush of contact between you two.

Part of you was afraid to give in and explore where this was leading, this dizzying chemical pull between you and your newly reformed friend. Another part wondered if you were imagining things, projecting some deeper meaning onto innocent friendliness.

But the largest part of you, the part that recognized the same blazing intensity from Hinata that used to set gymnasiums alight when he took the court...that part was purely intrigued to see just how far this obsession could go if you fanned the flames rather than backing away.

As the conversation continued to flow naturally between you two, you started to relax more into the familiar camaraderie. Hinata's boisterous energy and lack of filter were still very much intact, to your amusement.

"So then this rookie on the team tries to mess with me during practice," Hinata was saying animatedly, "Acting all cocky because he's some hotshot striker right out of university. But he doesn't realize who he's messing with!"

His eyes flashed with a competitive fire that made something stir low in your belly. You could easily envision the intimidating aura he must command on the court these days.

"Well, what happened next?" you prompted, leaning forward with rapt attention.

Hinata flashed you a wicked grin. "Let's just say he learned very quickly not to underestimate the flight patterns of my freak quick strikes."

There was an edge of cockiness, of arrogance coloring his deep voice that you had definitely never heard from him before. This supreme self-assuredness, this awareness of his own prowess was utterly intoxicating coming from the usually humble, sometimes bumbling boy you remembered.

"You should have seen the way he was gaping at me after I spiked that ball right past his face," Hinata continued, leaning back to throw an arm over the back of the couch behind you. "The look on his face was priceless."

His movement brought you two even closer together, close enough for the heady scent of his aftershave to cloud your senses. You tried not to visibly react as the back of his hand came to rest against the nape of your neck, sending tingles down your spine.

"I'll have to take you to one of my games sometime," he murmured, eyes darkening in a way that had nothing to do with the story he'd been telling. "I think you'd enjoy watching me hit the court...get a taste for my stamina and power up close."

The words seemed loaded with innuendo, dropping into the silence like lead weights strangling the air from the room. You swallowed thickly, frozen under the banked intensity of his stare. Was this really still just playful banter to him or was there an undeniable heat simmering behind those amber eyes?

Hinata leaned in a few hateful inches closer, his lips brushing the shell of your ear as he spoke in a low rumble. "I have a feeling you'd appreciate the view, among other things."

The implication in his tone was clear, setting your already heated skin aflame. This was not the innocent boy you had once played pretend with in your backyard. The man sitting before you now was all bravado and unrestrained desire barely contained beneath the surface.

Just as your mind began to reel, Hinata pulled back abruptly with a laugh, the spellbinding tension shattering. "But enough about me, what about you? Any hot dates or romantic prospects I should know about as your best friend?"

You could only gape at him, utterly thrown by theiplodic shift as he regarded you expectantly. Clearly this new Hinata was a master at skirting the line between propriety and inappropriate suggestion, holding you in a constant state of off-kilter want.

Part of you was uncomfortable with wherever this was leading, fearful of crossing boundaries you could never uncross with your childhood friend. But the other part, the growing part, was undeniably intrigued to call his bluff and finally unravel the obsessive beast you saw lurking beneath his careful words and heated stares.

Licking your lips, you managed to find your voice at last. "No, no one serious at the moment. But I'll be sure to let you know if that changes."

The blatant challenge glittered in your eyes, tossing the ball back into Hinata's court now. His pupils flared, a muscle feathering in his jaw as he studied you. It was clear the gauntlet had been thrown between you two - the only question was which of you would be the first to stop playing games and give in.

The charged tension continued to build between you and Hinata over the next few hours, every casual touch and weighted look laden with the promise of something more simmering just beneath.

His words became more boldly suggestive, clearly testing the boundaries to see how you would react. "You know, sometimes at night I still get flashes of the games we used to play as kids in your backyard," he mused at one point, amber eyes burning into you. "Except in my dreams, we were a little...older and the games became much more physical in nature."

You nearly choked on your drink, warmth flooding your cheeks. The blatant innuendo hung heavy in the air, daring you to either deflect or match his energy. Holding his heated stare, you replied evenly, "Is that so? I don't recall those kinds of games, but I'm certainly intrigued to learn the rules now."

A muscle flexed in Hinata's toned forearm where it rested on the back of the couch, the only visible sign of your words affecting him. His gaze darkened further, a low growl sounding in his throat that had your heartbeat thundering. For a moment, it seemed like the dam of restraint was about to break and he would finally act on the smoldering obsession written across every part of him.

But then the moment passed, that infuriatingly placid mask of friendly interest slipping back into place as if nothing had happened. "Well, maybe I'll have to show you sometime and refresh your memory," he said with a wink, so achingly casual.

The back and forth continued like this, each salacious comment and heated look slowly unraveling your nerves until finally you realized with a start that evening had begun creeping in through the windows.

"Oh wow, I didn't realize how late it had gotten," you murmured, disappointment and relief pooling in your chest. Part of you was grateful for the reprieve from the exquisite torture, while the other part ached to keep pushing to see how far Hinata would eventually take this.

"I should probably get going," you continued, standing up from the couch and trying not to look too affected. "But we'll have to do this again really soon, Shoyo. I've missed you."

You realized the truth in your own words as you said them. Despite the simmering tension and undercurrent of something darker lurking within Hinata, it felt so refreshingly wonderful to have your oldest friend back in your life again after all this time.

Hinata's expression softened at your parting words, something painfully tender flickering across his features before the hungry gaze returned. "Count on it. In fact..."

He rose as well, following you towards the door with those powerful, assured strides. You felt dwarfed beneath his towering height, pinned by the smoldering look he swept over your body. Reaching out, his calloused fingers grazed your arm, tracing upwards to curl around the back of your neck with unrestrained possessiveness.

Your breath hitched in your throat, trapped by the unyielding heat in his stare. He pulled you flush against the solid wall of his chest with a gentleness that somehow felt more frightening than outright aggression. You could feel every shuddering inhale, every thump of his hammering heart against your own ribcage.

"How about I walk you home?" Hinata husked, his lips a hair's breadth from yours now. "Make sure you get there safe?"

You could only mutely nod in acquiescence, all power of speech robbed by the delirious tension rapidly crescendoing around you both. His grip tightened ever so slightly against your nape, a clear undercurrent of possession in the deceptively simple request.

The walk back to your apartment building passed in a heated daze, the only sound your shaky breaths and the white noise roaring in your ears. Every nerve ending felt electrified under the weight of Hinata's domineering presence beside you. He was so close, the scent of his cologne and body heat making your head swim with visceral awareness of him.

When at last you reached your doorstep, you started to turn and bid him goodnight, but your words died on your lips as Hinata suddenly crowded you back against the door. His large palm slammed against the wood by your head with a bang, face ducking down to crash his lips against yours in a heated, untamed kiss.

A shocked gasp parted your lips, allowing his insistent tongue to delve deeper, staking its claim as he devoured you. You clutched the hard planes of his chest, knees turning to liquid at the unbridled desire, the feral obsession driving his fevered movements. This was not the chaste affection of childhood friends - this was a man's unyielding passion finding its voice at last.

Then, as abruptly as the searing kiss began, Hinata tore himself away. You slumped back against the door, chest heaving as if you'd just run a marathon, lips still tingling from the lingering heat of him. When you finally managed to pry your eyes open, Hinata was watching you with hooded eyes, body tense like a lion poised to pounce again.

But instead, he simply retreated a step backwards, the briefest flicker of a satisfied smirk playing across his swollen lips. "Goodnight, (Y/N)," he murmured in that deep, rasping timbre that had become your undoing. "Sleep well."

And with that, he turned and started back towards his apartment, leaving you a gasping, disheveled mess still slumped against your door in disbelief.

The next morning, you awoke feeling groggy and disoriented, as if emerging from some fevered dream. Fleeting fragments of memory ricocheted through your mind - the blazing heat of Hinata's kiss, the undeniable hunger in his touch, the gravelly timbre of his parting words that had you squirming restlessly through the night.

Surely that couldn't have been real...could it? Your fingers drifted up to ghost across your still-tingling lips, the phantom taste of him making a shiver chase down your spine. No, it was too visceral, too branded into your very bones to be anything but reality.

Which made Hinata's complete nonchalance when you finally ventured next door all the more confounding.

"Morning, sleepyhead!" he greeted you cheerfully after pulling open the door, seemingly oblivious to your rattled state. Not a single hair was out of place, every inch of him the picture of friendly affability, as if he hadn't ravaged you against that same door just hours before.

"I, uh, made some coffee if you want a cup?" he continued when you failed to respond, holding up the steaming mug in front of you. "Cream and sugar's on the counter."

You blinked dumbly, struggling to find your footing as Hinata brushed past you towards the kitchen, jostling your shoulder with his warmth. The familiar citrus notes of his body wash and subtle musk wafted over you, conspiring to make your head spin anew with half-remembered sensations.

Clearly seeing your frozen, flustered state, Hinata's brow furrowed slightly in concern as he regarded you. "You okay? You're looking a little...flushed."

His eyes slowly trailed down your body in an unhurried once-over, like a physical caress raising goosebumps across your heated skin. You fought not to squirm beneath that smoldering amber gaze, dark memories of its intensity looming over you threatening to unravel you completely.

Somewhere beneath the indifferent veil, you caught the brief flash of a knowing smirk playing across Hinata's full lips before it disappeared just as quickly.

"Sorry, I'm just...still waking up I guess," you managed to stammer out at last, averting your eyes.

"Well, wake up quickly then!" Hinata clapped you lightly on the shoulder, the innocent touch somehow loaded with suggestion. "I was thinking we could go on a hike together later and explore some of the old trails? For old time's sake."

His brilliant, sly grin was daring you to read between the lines. What fresh depravities might await you two alone on those "old trails"? The question hung unspoken but heavy between you as your tongue slicked unconsciously across your lower lip.

Hinata's eyes followed the movement hungrily, pupils flaring for the barest hint of a moment before regaining their innocuous sheen. Every part of him screamed he was a master at this game of plausible deniability.

"Only if you're feeling up for it, that is," he added smoothly, stepping close enough for his clean, heady scent to cloud your senses anew. A heavy-lidded look was cast your way, not quite a challenge but definitely dangling an unspoken promise of something more if you were brave enough to agree.

Your throat clicked in a dry swallow as you held his piercing gaze, vividly recalling the taste of his tongue in your mouth, the scorching brand of his hands on your body. There would be no going back once you stepped over this line with him, of that you were certain.

"You know what?" you murmured, leaning in until your lips were a hairsbreadth from brushing against the heated skin of his neck. You felt Hinata's pulse kick up in response, a low rumble vibrating from deep in his chest. "I think a nice long hike is exactly what I need to...clear my head."

As you pulled back, you allowed your eyes to trail brazenly down the corded lines of his throat, across the broad expanse of his chest, daring him to stop playing coy and claim what was rightfully his.

Hinata's eyes were molten fire, burning straight through what little restraint still remained between you two. There would be no more childish pining from afar or hollow games of making you wonder - this day in the wilderness would be about finally indulging the ravenous obsession that had simmered too long unchecked.

This time, there would be no going back to how things used to be. One way or another, you were about to get a firsthand taste of just how far Hinata's hunger for you could go when given the chance.

The hike started out innocuously enough, just two old friends exploring familiar trails and reminiscing about days gone by. The warm spring air and lush greenery surrounding you was almost enough to make you forget the raging wildfire of tension simmering between you and Hinata.

Almost, but not quite.

No matter how casual and lighthearted the conversation flowed, you were hyper-aware of every loaded glance, every "accidental" brush of contact searing straight through you. The memory of Hinata's searing kiss was branded into your very cells, stoking an insatiable yearning you hadn't felt in years.

You found yourself unable to meet his eyes for too long without getting lost in their molten depths, breath hitching at the banked intensity that promised so much more if you let it unfurl fully. Hinata seemed to revel in reducing you to a flustered wreck with little more than a heated stare or casual touch skating along your arm.

The atmosphere grew thicker the deeper you ventured into the secluded trails, a heavy silence blanketing you both as words fell away in favor of something else entirely. You could feel the obsessive pull between you cresting towards its inevitable peak.

It happened so fast when it finally snapped - one moment you were walking slightly ahead of Hinata on the narrow path, the next you felt a solid weight slamming into your back as he crowded you up against the nearest tree trunk. The breath punched from your lungs in a harsh gasp, but any noise was swallowed by Hinata's scorching kiss.

His large hands cradled your face in a punishingly tight grip, angling you backwards as he devoured you with the same unrestrained hunger from last night. You clutched the solid plates of his back as he pressed closer, the hard ridge of his cock grinding shamelessly against you.

There would be no preamble, no questioning what was happening between you two this time. The dam had finally burst and Hinata was claiming you as his obsession laid bare at last. When he finally wrenched his lips away with a guttural groan, you were both panting harshly.

"About damn time," was all he rasped out in that ruined timbre before crashing his mouth back against yours.

No more words needed to be exchanged after that. You simply gave yourself over to the onslaught of sensations - his calloused hands roaming hungrily, his hips rutting against you in primal undulations, his harsh pants scorching your neck as he blazed a trail of opened-mouth kisses downward.

Restraint and uncertainty shattered, nothing existed in this moment except for slaking the ravenous cravings that had smoldered between you both for far too long. Years of repressed obsession, of dark desires aching to be indulged, all came pouring out in a frenzy of tangled limbs and desperate caresses.

There would be no going back after this. You had awoken the unrestrained beast in Hinata and he was never letting you go again. But as his skilled fingers deftly divested you of your top and his solid weight pinned you to the forest floor, you found you had no single regret about succumbing so completely to his smoldering hunger.

The frenzied make-out rapidly descended into uncharted territory, hands grasping and exploring with reckless abandon as you both surrendered fully to the raging obsession. Hinata's broad frame was splayed over you, caging you against the forest floor as he rutted shamelessly into the cradle of your thighs.

You arched off the ground with a keening whine, nails raking down the corded muscles of his back as wet heat pooled between your legs. This was really happening - years of repressed yearning were about to finally find their release. Hinata growled deep in his chest, the scorching brand of his tongue searing its path along the slender column of your neck.

Just as you reached up to tug insistently at the hem of his shirt, desperate to divest the offending barrier and feel his searing skin against yours, Hinata suddenly froze. His harsh pants fanned across your flushed cheek as he drew back slightly, eyes glittering with some emotion you couldn't quite decipher.

Before you could even process what was happening, he rolled off of you in one abrupt, fluid movement. The sudden lack of his solid weight crushed you with its absence, leaving you splayed out and utterly wrecked on the forest floor as he rose to tower over you.

You could only gape up at him, chest heaving rapidly from your entwined state moments before. Hinata simply stood there drinking in the sight of you so thoroughly disheveled, eyes blazing with something that looked a lot like triumph etched across his sharp features.

After allowing the weighted silence to stretch tortuously, he bent down to retrieve your discarded top, holding it out to you without a single word. It was like emerging from a fever dream, the abrupt shift disorienting you even further.

You felt heat prickling across your skin as you shakily accepted the offered garment, struggling to cover your breasts with shaking hands. Hinata didn't so much as bat an eyelash, merely turning on his heel and continuing along the trail as if nothing had happened.

"You coming?" he tossed over his nonchalant shoulder after a few paces, as casual as could be.

Still sprawled there in stunned disbelief, you could only stare after him, mouth agape at the whiplash shift. Part of you was mortified at being left utterly debauched on the forest floor. But the larger part, the part that recognized a deliciously depraved game when you saw one, felt a reckless thrill starting to build.

So that was how Hinata wanted to play things - all heated frenzy one moment only to leave you aching and unfulfilled the next with that stoic nonchalance. Well, two could undoubtedly play at that game if that was the case.

Scrambling the rest of the way into a standing position, you hastened to follow after his retreating form. If Hinata thought he could get away with teasing you to the brink like that without some delightfully torturous form of retaliation, he had another thing coming.

By the time you managed to catch up, his expression was a mask of polite obliviousness, the smoldering heat from earlier carefully banked once more. Only the slightest quirk at the corner of his lips hinted that he was well aware of the effect he'd had on you.

"Lovely day for a hike, isn't it?" was all he said, smiling beatifically as you fell into step beside him.

You shot him a sidelong look, letting your eyes deliberately trail down the distinct bulge still tenting the front of his shorts. That innocent facade wouldn't last long once you decided to enact your vengeance, of that you were certain.

"The perfect day," you agreed lightly, gaze skating back up to meet his heavy-lidded stare.

Let the games begin.

The thick tension lingered heavily between you and Hinata in the days following your hike, neither of you acknowledging or discussing what had transpired on the secluded trail. You went about your routines and conversations as normal, but the undercurrent of unresolved desire simmered with every lingering glance and casual touch that felt electric.

Finally, you decided to invite Hinata over for a home-cooked dinner at your place a few nights later, hoping to find some release from the maddening tension. He arrived with that same nonchalant ease, not a hair out of place, as if he hadn't ravaged you against a tree trunk just days prior.

Dinner itself flowed smoothly, the two of you slipping back into familiar banter and catching up. But you didn't miss the way Hinata's piercing stare trailed over your body when he thought you weren't looking, or how his large hands seemed to linger whenever he passed you something.

"You know, I haven't stopped thinking about what happened on that trail," Hinata said abruptly during a lull in conversation. His tone was conversational, but the smoldering look he fixed you with was anything but casual.

You felt your throat go dry under his heated appraisal. "Oh? And what's there to think about?" you managed to reply, keeping your expression carefully neutral despite your rabbiting pulse.

Hinata's lips curved into the barest hint of a smirk, clearly seeing through your nonchalance. He leaned in closer, braced forearms on the table bringing his face mere inches from yours as he lowered his voice to an intimate rumble.

"Don't play coy, you know exactly what I mean. I meant it when I said I've been waiting years for that moment, to finally get my hands on you like I've craved."

His words struck you like a physical caress, raising goosebumps along your heated skin as you fought not to squirm. The raw honesty, the undisguised obsession burning in Hinata's molten gaze made your head spin.

"I've fantasized about you more times than I can count," he continued in that same low timbre laden with promise. "Imagining what you'd look like splayed out underneath me, writhing and whimpering for more while I took you apart piece by piece."

You swallowed hard, suddenly regretting trying to maintain pretenses of normalcy between you two. This clearly was anything but a normal situation – the powerful, athletic man before you was practically vibrating with years' worth of repressed hunger and fixation.

"So no, I haven't stopped thinking about finally claiming what's mine," Hinata concluded, holding your stare captive with smoldering intensity. "And I won't stop until I've had my fill, until you recognize you've belonged to me all along whether you realized it yet or not."

There was no questioning his blunt words, no interpreting the blatant obsession and dark undercurrents driving him now. Hinata had been pushed to the brink, and he was done with subtlety. You were his all-consuming fixation, the object of his ultimate hunger.

And from the way his hooded eyes trailed over your lips, he was making it abundantly clear he had no intentions of stopping until that appetite was finally sated, no matter how long it took.

The heavy silence stretched between you and Hinata, the weight of his ardent confession hanging thick in the air. His burning stare pinned you in place, demanding a reaction even as your brain struggled to process his blunt words and undeniable obsession.

Before you could formulate a response, Hinata abruptly shoved away from the table and closed the distance between you in two long strides. Powerful arms encircled your waist, hauling you flush against the searing wall of his chest as he captured your lips in a scorching, desperate kiss.

You made a muffled noise of surprise against his mouth, but it quickly melted into undisguised want as the dizzying heat of him overwhelmed your senses. This time there was no restraint, no coy suggestion - just Hinata taking with the same unrestrained obsession he had promised.

His large hands roamed hungrily over your curves, bunching the fabric of your top as he angled your head to deepen the frenzied kiss. You clutched at the straining muscles of his back, whimpering at the solid planes you could feel flexing beneath your palms with each roll of his hips grinding shamelessly against you.

Hinata's harsh growl of approval vibrated against your lips before he seized the opportunity to lick inside, tasting and claiming you with fervent sweeps of his tongue. You melted helplessly back against the solid oak of the table digging into your lower back, utterly at his mercy.

There would be no more feigned nonchalance, no more skirting the issue driving this raging obsession between you two. Not when you could feel the undeniable ridge of Hinata's arousal rutting against your pelvis, or the wet heat of him leaving a searing trail down the vulnerable column of your neck.

"Hinata...we shouldn't—ah!" Whatever feeble protest you tried to voice was swallowed by his searing mouth devouring you once more.

"Don't try to deny this, don't try to pretend this hasn't been leading here all along," he all but growled when he finally tore his lips away, pinning you captive with eyes blazing like molten amber. "I'm done with games and holding back. You're mine, whether you can admit it to yourself yet or not."

His calloused fingers deftly worked at the buttons of your top, divesting you of the garment in one smooth tug as he bared your tingling flesh to his smoldering gaze. You shuddered, suddenly hyper-aware of how exposed and vulnerable you were beneath his ravenous stare.

But any shred of self-consciousness was forgotten the next instant as Hinata dipped his head, fevered mouth searing a path downwards across your flushed chest. Your breath stuttered in your lungs as he reached the peak of your breast, suckling hard enough to leave a mark before soothing the sting with his tongue.

You couldn't contain the moan that spilled from your lips, the visceral pleasure and aching heat too intense to remain silent. Hinata rumbled his approval, calloused hands gripping your hips in a punishing hold as he continued his relentless onslaught.

The searing trail he blazed over your trembling body was unrelenting, leaving a map of open-mouthed kisses and love bites in his wake. His teeth nipped at the soft flesh of your stomach, followed by the soothing swipe of his tongue and then the graze of his nose as he inhaled your scent.

Every sense was drowning in him - the searing heat of his palms, the heady citrus notes of his cologne, the low growls emanating from deep in his chest as he slowly drove you mad with sensation.

You could feel the throbbing ache growing between your thighs, the telltale dampness soaking your panties. There was no disguising your arousal from him now, no pretending the raw desire coursing through your veins was anything less than the truth.

Hinata was a man possessed, his fixation driving him onward as he dropped to his knees, yanking down your leggings and underwear in one smooth movement. You felt a rush of cool air hit your exposed center, the sudden vulnerability sending a shockwave of goosebumps rippling across your heated skin.

The breath punched from your lungs as Hinata surged forward, burying his face between your legs without warning. You cried out, head dropping back with a thunk against the unforgiving wood of the table as pleasure jolted through you.

He wasted no time, licking a broad stripe up your center before suckling on your clit, making your knees buckle beneath you. All you could do was clutch the short strands of his hair for purchase, gasping and keening with every sweep of his talented tongue.

Hinata seemed just as lost in the frenzy as you, grunts of pleasure reverberating through your very core as he devoured you whole. You could feel his strong arms gripping your hips, pinning you in place while his thumbs rubbed soothing circles over your hipbones.

The sight of him kneeling before you, head buried between your thighs and feasting on your wet cunt with single-minded determination was too much. The white-hot pleasure rapidly crested, threatening to send you hurtling over the edge at any moment.

Your moans grew louder, fingers tightening in Hinata's hair as your climax neared. You felt his lips curve into a smirk against your slick flesh, clearly recognizing how close you were. Then, just as your entire body was coiled tight as a bowstring, poised to snap, Hinata withdrew.

"Wha—why did you stop?" you panted out in a whine, hips canting forward in desperation.

You were so achingly close, could feel the phantom pressure of his tongue where it had just been. You were right on the cusp, teetering on the edge. One more swipe of his skilled tongue and you would have tumbled over.

"Because," Hinata purred, his warm breath ghosting over your throbbing cunt and making you shudder, "there’s no way in hell I'm letting you come unless it's on my cock."

With that, he rose from his knees, dragging his tongue along the column of your throat. You whimpered, the loss of contact making you ache even worse than before. Then Hinata's lips were back against yours, hot and insistent, and you tasted yourself on his tongue.

You groaned, fingers fumbling to tear at the buttons of his shirt and push the offending garment off his shoulders. Hinata made a rumbling noise of approval deep in his chest, calloused fingers tangling in your hair and tilting your head back to deepen the kiss.

The moment his shirt fell away, exposing the hard planes of his sculpted torso, you were clawing at the waistband of his jeans. You wanted him, needed him, craved the feeling of his throbbing cock splitting you open.

Your frenzied movements had him chuckling, the deep sound sending another shiver racing down your spine. But Hinata was just as far gone, his large hands grasping yours and helping to yank down his pants and boxers in one smooth motion.

The sight of his erect cock, swollen and throbbing with precum glistening at the tip, had your mouth going dry. Your eyes trailed down the hard lines of his stomach, taking in the rest of his powerful body. The faint trail of hair leading downwards, the sculpted v-lines that were a roadmap to the most delicious places on earth, and his thick cock standing proud and ready for you.

Hinata growled deep in his throat, seizing your hips in a punishing grip and hoisting you onto the edge of the table. Your thighs parted automatically, a whimper falling from your lips at the rough manhandling.

Then the thick head of his cock was nudging against your slick folds, not quite pushing in but still driving you wild with anticipation. His thumb guided the fat tip along your slit, rubbing it in small circles as he let it dip slightly inside, teasing you with the promise of what was to come.

He was watching your face with such rapt intensity, his pupils blown wide and nostrils flaring with every shaky inhale. His chest was rising and falling rapidly, the corded muscles of his stomach twitching and flexing. He was just as lost in the sensation as you were, his self-control slipping the more his cock slid through your folds.

You could feel your arousal coating his thick length, slicking him up with each pass. Hinata's breaths were coming quicker now, his eyelids fluttering and his head dropping forward as he ground his cock along your aching center.

He was right on the cusp, his hips moving erratically. He was trying to hold back, to maintain his composure and tease you even longer. But you could see the cracks starting to show in his mask of restraint, could see how much he was struggling to hold himself back.

Just when the tension was about to snap, Hinata reached down, grasping his cock at the base and giving it a few rough pumps. His eyes rolled back in his head, a deep groan of pleasure rumbling through his chest as he came.

Thick ropes of cum painted your stomach and breasts, dripping down his fist as his cock pulsed and twitched in his grip.

It was so fucking hot, so depraved, to have Hinata's release marking your body, to know you had driven him to this level of ecstasy.

He gave a shuddering gasp, eyelids fluttering open as the last dregs of his orgasm washed over him. The look of utter satisfaction on his face as he took in the mess he'd made of you, the possessive gleam in his eye as he raked his gaze over your body, was enough to have you aching and needy all over again.

You watched on curiously as he reached over to grab his phone, aiming the camera at you. Your mouth went dry at the realization of what he was doing, a jolt of pleasure rushing through you at the thought.

"Don't move," Hinata murmured, voice heavy with satisfaction and desire. "I want to remember this moment for the rest of my life. You don’t know how many times I've fantasized about this, how often I've jerked myself raw thinking of you covered in my cum."

The click of the camera captured the moment forever, the proof of your mutual debauchery immortalized on the screen. His lips curved into a sinful smirk, eyes flicking up to meet yours.

"My turn," he growled.

In the next instant, he had you pinned back against the table, his weight settling on top of you as his tongue dragged through the mess on your stomach. You whimpered, fingers tangling in his hair and hips canting upwards to seek out some kind of relief.

Hinata hummed his approval, lapping up every last drop of his release before shifting further upward, licking and nipping his way across your heaving chest.

His cock was already hard again, pulsing and grinding against your soaked folds. The heat of him was searing, setting your body ablaze with pleasure. He was teasing you, torturing you, his lips sucking a dark bruise along the sensitive skin of your neck.

"You know," he murmured, hips rolling in an unhurried pace, his words a rumble against your ear, "I could get used to this view."

A strangled moan escaped your lips as his cockhead notched against your entrance, the heady promise of release just within reach. Hinata was still teasing you, dragging his shaft along your soaked slit as his lips grazed the shell of your ear.

"But if I'm going to keep fucking you on this table, I need to make sure you won't spill any leftovers."

You could feel his lips curve into a smirk, the barest hint of a chuckle vibrating through his chest. But you were too far gone, too lost in the sensation of his thick cock sliding through your folds and grazing your throbbing clit.

Your entire body was tensed like a bowstring, wound up so tightly that the slightest movement would snap it. And when Hinata finally, finally, pushed his thick cock inside you, the string snapped.

You cried out, arching off the table as stars exploded behind your eyelids. Pleasure unlike anything you'd ever experienced washed over you in waves, your cunt spasming around the solid girth stretching you open. You felt the foreign sensation of something liquid gushing from your pussy, coating Hinata's cock and your inner thighs.

"Fuck," Hinata hissed, his head dropping to your shoulder. "Did you just squirt? You didn’t tell me you were a squirter, fuck, that's so fucking hot."

He sounded almost drunk, his words slurred as he started thrusting into you. Each pump of his hips had another wave of pleasure crashing over you, your body convulsing and clenching around his cock.

Hinata fucked you through the aftershocks, his hips slamming into you and driving his cock impossibly deep. Your hands scrabbled at his shoulders, fingernails digging into the straining muscles as you held on for dear life.

He was relentless, pounding into you and chasing his own release. The wet sounds of his cock sliding in and out of your cunt, the harsh slap of his balls against your ass, the groans and grunts escaping his throat – all of it only heightened the sensations overwhelming your body.

Your eyes rolled back in your head, a string of curses falling from your lips as the pressure built once again. This time you knew you wouldn't be able to hold back, wouldn't be able to keep from exploding into a million pieces.

The tension was coiling tighter, your body trembling as Hinata fucked you harder. It was too much, the pleasure was too intense, it was almost painful. You were so close, you were almost there, you just needed a little more, a little—

"Oh god," you cried, your body arching off the table as your cunt clenched around his cock, gushing another flood of liquid.

Hinata let out a growl, his thrusts becoming more erratic. You could feel his cock pulsing and twitching, his breathing ragged and uneven. He was right there with you, his own climax building.

"That's it," he rasped, his grip on your hips bruising as he slammed into you. "Fuck, I can feel your cunt milking my cock, fuck, fuck, fuck—"

With a final cry, his hips stuttered and he came, his cock spurting ropes of cum deep inside you. The sensation of his hot release filling you up, the feeling of his cock pulsing and twitching as he emptied himself, was enough to send you over the edge again.

Your orgasm tore through you, your body convulsing and gushing around his cock. The pleasure was so intense, it was almost painful. You could feel his cum leaking out of you, running down your thighs and soaking the table beneath you.

"God, I love watching you squirt," Hinata growled, his eyes half-lidded as he watched his release leak from your cunt. "I could do this all day, watch you cream all over my cock and soak this table. You're so fucking hot."

You could only moan, your body completely spent and limp from the intensity of your orgasms. Hinata pulled out, his softening cock slipping from your pussy with a wet squelch. More cum leaked from your cunt, dribbling down your thighs.

He scooped some up with his fingers, pushing it back inside you with a satisfied smirk. You shuddered, the feeling of his cum inside you making your cunt clench around his digits.

"Mmm, we're gonna need to do a lot more work to make sure none of this leaks," he purred, his other hand trailing over your stomach and smearing the remnants of his release into your skin. "We can't let any of this go to waste, now can we?"

You whimpered, his words and touch sending sparks of pleasure through you. He chuckled, his fingers slowly pumping in and out of your cum-filled pussy.

"That's right," he murmured, leaning down to capture your lips in a scorching kiss. "Let's see just how many times I can make you squirt before the night's over."

#haikyuu smut #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x reader smut #hinata smut #hinata x reader #hinata x reader smut #hinata shouyou #hinata shoyuo #hinata shoyo x reader #hinata shoyo smut

[royaltozaki]

you can kiss a hundred boys in bars

synopsis: good luck, babe! - inspired fic (essentially sana left 6 years ago and you still can't stop thinking about her even though you're married to another man)

warnings: cheating, internalised homophobia, not chronological, implied sex, cursing

w/c: 6.4k

a/n: hi 😀 this one may not hit as many of the audiences but it was interesting to write. i zon't think i like it toooo much for how much time i spent on it (edit: the moots have made my day i do like this one a lot actually) but just one of those things i needed to get out before i was able to move on to the next thing :P weeeEEEEHHEEEE i love angst!!!!!!!

ok this one's going to be a bit different guys pls READ THIS or you'll be like what the fuck. purple text is the present. ty enjoy, that was it LOL.

▂▂⌇

you wake up with a migraine. it came not long after you married frank and it’s stayed ever since. you sit up on the bed, careful not to make too much movement or sound to wake your husband next to you. although that was pretty unlikely anyway considering how he slept.

you sigh lightly, holding your head in your hands trying to mitigate the damage.

your head starts drifting off, as it did on most nights these days. it seemed the only thing that ever worked to stop the pounding in your head was thinking about her.

▂▂⌇

funnily enough, sana was actually the reason you and frank had met.

it had happened when the both of you were at a bar after class celebrating the end of exams. sana being sana had made a whole group of friends 10 minutes upon entering the establishment. you were sitting back watching her challenge someone to down the most shots in one minute. you would have stopped her on another day but after the hell week she's been through with her finals, you figured she deserved it. and you'd be there to take her home afterwards anyway.

she's whooping and jumping around, turning back to you with a grin when she wins. the poor loser skulking away back to his friends.

frank goes up to her then. introducing himself with that kind voice of his, just making sure she had someone to go home with and look after her.

and sana adored the attention. she's flirting with that charm of hers that no one could resist. but strangely enough, frank resisted. he was a gentleman, not wanting to pursue anything while sana was intoxicated, instead, he asked who could look after her, and sana points to you.

▂▂⌇

you're not getting back to sleep. instead you silently step out of bed, grabbing your phone and the hidden pack of cigarettes you kept in the second drawer of your bedside cupboard.

you step outside onto the balcony, breathing in the cool night air, shivering a little as you wrap the blanket you left on the balcony chair around you.

you click the lighter on, the small flame illuminating the darkness of the night, the only other light source aside from the moon. you're thinking if sana's somewhere she can see the moon right now while you put the lighter to the end of your cigarette. is it night for her? was she asleep? did she ever think about you?

you bring the stick to your mouth, inhaling, feeling the roughness of the nicotine hit your lungs, and exhaling softly, watching the wisps of smoke dissolve into the night sky.

sana hated when you smoked. frank didn't like it too much either, but he was never able to stop you.

▂▂⌇

"do you have to do that here?" sana's frowning when you release a puff of smoke into the air.

"sorry. stressed." you mumble in response, cig still stuck between your lips.

"you know i can help with that. just not when you taste like an ashtray." sana's still staring at the cancer stick you're sucking on with contempt, she never hated anything but if you had to place your money on something it'd be your bad habit.

you're smiling sheepishly, taking the cigarette out of your mouth and smooshing the end until it's not burning anymore.

the frown on her face is gone immediately, she's charmed you listen to her so easily. and she sticks to her word, stepping closer and leaning in.

your lips meet lazily, she's got a hand on your cheek, the other at your waist. you're wrapping your arms around her hips, holding her against you as your lips slot against each other.

sana was an attractive woman. there was no doubt about that. the two of you had met during high school. she had caught you sneaking off for a smoke during P.E. and had somehow convinced you to go and get your nails done with her instead. ever since then you two had been inseperable.

it was after you broke up with your first boyfriend in college that you started sleeping together. you remember he had decided to call it off because he was going all mormon and was ashamed of having had sex already, calling you a 'sex-addicted whore who was sent by the devil to tempt him into the flames of hell'. sana despised that he made you feel unwanted, and even more that he blamed you for the break up. she needed you to know just how valued you were, just how wanted you were, and in her drunk dazed mind that meant worshipping you until you came crying under her. and in your drunk dazed, heartbroken, self-pitying mind, you let her.

when it happened again, and again, and again, and then not under any alcoholic influence, the both of you decided to continue seeking each other out for sexual relief whenever you were stressed, or in any sort of mood that called for sex. you stopped every time one of you started a new relationship, but you always found your way back into each other's arms eventually.

▂▂⌇

you curse lightly when you reach the end of your cigarette.

picking out another one, you’re repeating your actions, lighting it up, bringing it between your lips, inhaling, feeling it fill your lungs, and then pushing it back out.

there hasn’t been a single day that’s gone by where you hadn’t thought about sana. frank didn’t get it at first. he asked you why you couldn’t just call her, you two were the best of friends, surely it wouldn’t be that difficult to reconnect?

he didn’t know you slept with sana on the night of you and frank’s wedding. doesn’t know the countless times you’ve slept with her before that. doesn’t know sana woke up earlier than you the next day, disappearing into the early morning, no note, no text, nothing. you were too ashamed to try and contact her for weeks after that, it wasn’t until you came back from your honeymoon that you realised you were knocking on an empty door when you tried to find her at her apartment. it was cleaned out, no furniture, no remnants of her, nothing to prove she even existed. you had called her over and over, tears of desperation spilling over, holding back choked sobs that only grew stronger with each voicemail message.

it wasn't until sana's old landlord holding a 'for lease' sign in his hand comes and kicks you out that you finally realise you'd lost her.

after that, your relationship with frank started to deteriorate. what did you expect though? was it sana's fault? if sana hadn't left would you have lived happily ever after, the three of you together?

it took a long time to realise the answer to that was no. you spent years blaming sana for leaving, and when you finally came to the terms that you were the one who drove her away, it was too much to bear.

▂▂⌇

"y/n!"

you smile at the sound of sana calling you in the corridor, turning to meet her hug as she crashes into you.

she starts talking your ear off and you nod along enthusiastically, but suddenly she stops, looks down to your hand, intertwined with someone else's.

"oh. who's this y/n?"

you look over at your newest boyfriend in surprise, almost forgetting he was holding your hand and standing next to you. you tended to forget a lot of things when sana was around.

"oh this is danny. we met at that bar i told you about last week remember?"

"hmm..." she's looking up at him in scrutiny, eyes squinted and eyebrows furrowed. you can feel danny's palms start to sweat under her gaze.

"one week huh? not bad, let's see how long you last, if you go longer than a month then i'll introduce myself to you." sana says then.

"sana!" you're hitting her lightly, flabbergasted at her insinuation.

"what? your last one was like 3 days. you just keep breaking these guys' hearts y/n." she places a hand over her heart dramatically.

danny's tightening his grip around your hand, speaking up, "excuse me, i don’t appreciate you wishing doom on our relationship even before its started. and i wouldn’t want to be introduced to a slut who’s never had a real relationship before anyway.”

sana’s speechless for a second but her face morphs into a scowl quickly after, “okay danny,” spitting out his name, “first rule of being a decent boyfriend? don’t talk shit about your girlfriend’s best friends. let’s see you last another hour after that comment.” she turns to you, raising an eyebrow, “you gonna let him off with that y/n?”

you’re stuck, and danny’s looking at you expectantly.

“sana… that comment was a little uncalled for y’know… you did kinda start this…”

danny’s smirking, looking smugly back towards sana.

“what?! are you serious right now y/n? y’know what? i don’t care. your life and whatever. see you later.” she’s stomping off, your heart sinking as you watch her.

“c’mon babe, forget her. let’s go get sushi.” danny doesn’t wait for a response before he’s pulling you in the other direction.

▂▂⌇

when you wake up again the next day, frank’s gone.

you stumble to your feet, clumsily making your way to the bathroom.

it’s almost late afternoon already. you’re lucky you didn’t have work today.

sana always used to scold you if you woke up past noon. she said you'd waste the whole day sleeping when you could have been spending it with her.

these days the second option wasn't exactly viable.

you cringe a little when you catch sight of yourself in the mirror. unkempt hair, dark circles under your eyes, visible signs of ageing. you'd bet sana still looked as radiant as she was all those years ago.

your phone starts buzzing when you turn on your electric toothbrush. it couldn't be anyone else other than frank. you didn't really talk to anyone else anyway. after sana left, you became a social recluse, and a lot of your friends were technically sana's friends so without that mutual connection anymore, you drifted from them very quickly.

“hello?”

“hey y/n, is my white button-up back from the dry cleaners yet? i need it tonight for this work event.”

“… no you didn’t tell me to pick anything up.”

“what? i left a note for you on the fridge did you not see it?”

“i just woke up frank.”

“it’s 2pm.”

“yeah.”

you can hear him sigh over the phone, “alright it’s fine i’ll pick it up after work.” he hangs up abruptly after he says that.

no goodbye, no i love you, he doesn’t call you by any pet names anymore either, just y/n. well it’s not like you did any of those things for him so you suppose it’s fair. he did do a lot of those things when you were dating and early in your marriage but eventually, when you stopped responding and got more and more tired of being with him, he stopped trying as well. you can’t even remember the last time you were intimate together.

frank had suggested the both of you try out marriage counselling but you were strongly against the idea. you didn’t feel particularly excited about disclosing everything that went on with sana with frank let alone with a complete stranger. you remember that week you fought about it and you ran away and didn’t come back until a month later. frank only tried to call you once during that time.

▂▂⌇

you were standing in front of an apartment door in japan.

you weren’t really thinking when you stood at the front desk of the airport, demanding a ticket for the next flight to osaka with only a small backpack and some essentials you were able to grab after your fight with frank.

it wasn’t until you were physically in the plane that you realised you didn’t actually know anyone but sana there. and you had made that unconscious decision because being with frank was simply too… nothing, and being with sana was… everything. it had been over 6 years since you had seen her last, when she left you that quiet night in may.

though it seems fate was on your side this time. sana’s cousin just happened to be working at the airport the night you arrived, when she recognised you, she was waving excitedly, ushering you over.

“y/n right? oh my goodness i haven’t seen you in so long! not since that time sana brought you here 7 years ago right?” her accent is a little thick but you’re grateful she can speak korean regardless, you could only understand very basic japanese picked up from sana.

you’re nervously rubbing the back of your neck, “ahaha yeah… do you actually happen to have sana’s address?”

she frowns a little, “she didn’t give it to you when she found out you were coming?”

it seems like sana hasn’t told many people about your relationship with her either.

“u-um ahaha no she must have forgotten. you know how she gets… too excited she forgets the important little details.”

the cousin laughs a little in response, agreeing and quickly typing in sana’s address on your phone. internally you’re thanking all the gods and deities you know of for this stroke of luck or you’d really be stranded in osaka with no knowledge of the language and nowhere to stay.

“i have to get back to work but say hi to sana for me! we haven’t seen her much since she came back a few years ago, she’s been really busy with work i think.”

you nod, heart pounding at the tidbits of information you’re getting about sana. anything to fill in the 6 year gap you’ve been apart.

you wave goodbye, thanking her again and then you’re hailing down a taxi and showing the driver the destination on your phone.

so now you’re standing in front of her apartment door, hands sweaty and nervous, just praying she wouldn’t kick you out or worse.

you’ve been standing here stupidly, deliberating when, how, if you should even knock. when there’s a slight commotion to your left, the sound of a bag of groceries dropping and a light gasp.

“y/n?”

it’s very cinematic when you turn, sana coming into view for the first time in so long is like finding water in a desert. you’re drinking her in hungrily, her darker hair, smile lines, perfect nose, she looks just as beautiful as you remember.

“sana…” you’re voice is hoarse with emotion.

she’s taking slow steps towards you after picking up her groceries. one… two…

“what are you doing here?”

“i-i- u-um i-“

“how did you get my address?”

“u-um i saw y-your cousin at the airport and she recognised me and i- i may have asked her for your address... i'm sorry! i would have called or like let you know but... y'know... i-i couldn't really do that..."

she considers you for a little bit, looking you up and down, her face stoic.

"...did you come here for something then?"

"i- um- well not really it was k-kinda an impulse decision. u-um frank and i fought and i just- i don't know i went to the airport and i found myself here i guess..."

you notice how her hand tightens at the mention of frank's name, the slight sound of the crinkling of her grocery bag.

"and what did you want me to do about that?" she's pushing past you now, taking out her keys and starting to unlock her door. you begin to panic, scrambling for words.

"i- sana please! i- i'm sorry! i'm sorry okay?"

the jingling of her keys stops, but she doesn't look back at you.

"what are you sorry for? i'm the one who left remember?" her voice is bitter and a little shaky, you realise she's not facing you because she's trying not to cry. you ache to hold her.

"i… i’m the reason you left though. right? it took me a long time to realise but i’m sorry i wasn’t able to be true to myself and i’m sorry you were a casualty to that. i missed you sana…." your voice is quiet, you feel your own tears welling up in your eyes.

“… what weren’t you true to yourself about?”

you take a big inhale, breath shaky when you let it back out. “that i love you.” your voice is tiny, you just confessed your love for the woman you’ve spent most of your life with, the woman that’s occupied your mind every second of every minute since she’s entered your life. the woman you were too scared to admit you loved, who waited for you to do exactly that only for you to enter a loveless marriage with someone else. you can only imagine the pain you’ve put her through. it would be nothing compared to the last 6 years without her. and the last 6 years without sana were undoubtedly the worst of your life.

sana’s sniffling now, unable to hold back her cries.

you inch forward and tentatively place a hand on her shoulder. when she doesn’t move it, you shift closer again to wrap your arms around her loosely.

suddenly sana’s turning and burrowing her face in your neck, you feel her wet tears stain your skin, but also your own start to run down your face. you're surrounded with sana sana sana, her smell, her sounds, the feel of her against you when you tighten your arms around her. you missed this so fucking much. you missed her. and for the first time in 6 years, you finally felt like you were home again.

▂▂⌇

after you've finished your morning routine, you lazily trudge into the kitchen, discarding the small note frank had told you about, and pouring yourself a bowl of cereal.

you sigh into the empty house. frank wanted kids of course, that's why you bought such a large house in the first place. he had dreamt of the whole white-picket fence family and you were excited to share that with him and sana. she had helped you design the place, decorate it when you first moved in, she was meant to move across the street and you were going to grow old together and watch as your kids played around and became the best of friends, just like the two of you were.

now though? you hated this house. it just felt so much more empty. you and frank had tried for kids, although that only really drove you further apart. sex just became more of a chore than something you enjoyed, and when people know you're trying to get pregnant? suddenly everyone has their 2 cents on what you should eat, what types of exercise you should do, the latest superfood that was meant to make you more fertile. everyone seemed to have more control over your own relationship, over your own body than you did.

eventually, the small amounts of love you and frank had for each other, fizzled out. and you decided you didn't want to raise a child in a loveless marriage, that wouldn't be fair to them. frank, even with his endless optimism and kind soul, agreed.

▂▂⌇

that night in japan, for the first time in six years since you saw sana, you were able to kiss her again, to feel her bare skin against yours, to taste her as she writhed and cried out your name above you.

you woke up before her the next day, sun sluggishly making its way past the horizon. you watched as her breaths came in and out, soft, her expression at peace, not clouded with anger or sadness at you. you traced the lines of her face, recollecting every single hair, every mole, every perfection and imperfection on her, so she'd always be with you in your memory.

she stirred after a while, blinking softly and you wait for her to come to, fingers tracing soft lines over her side.

you feel her freeze under you, breathing picking up, just barely noticeable but you were sharing the same airspace. her eyes meet yours for the first time that morning and you're committing the brown irises to memory now as well.

"you didn't leave." her voice is laced with morning fatigue.

you only hum in response, continuing to trace random shapes into her skin.

"why?"

you take a moment to think about your answer. years ago, you would've been terrified with the idea that someone would've found out about the two of you. that someone would know your dirty little secret. and that secret was that you were in love with your best friend. it was different for sana. sana was flamboyant, and proud, and happy. it wouldn't matter who sana liked because that didn't take away from her personality. she was still valuable as a person. you weren't like that though. you were always just sana's best friend or danny's girlfriend or frank's girlfriend or whoever else you dated at the time. the moment you deviated from that, a new label would be stuck on you, and people would pity sana, talk about how she could do so much better, how you were a witch who lured sana in. so you were selfish. you took from sana, and you never gave back. because sana was perfect in your mind, and she didn't need anything else.

"i'm sorry. there's a lot to be sorry for and a lot i need to make up to you. but at the core of it all, i love you sana. these six years without you have been hell. and i'm sorry it took that long for me to realise this, but i love you, not frank, not anyone else, just you."

you feel your eyes begin to tear up, heavy with emotions, sana's mirroring you, her bottom lip slightly quivering.

"what happened with frank?" her voice is a little shaky.

"we fought. i didn't want to deal with him anymore, my feet took me to the airport, and i ended up here."

sana sighs then, turning away from you and lying on her back. "so you're still together?"

"well... i- no but-"

"how is this time any different then y/n?"

"i- i- it's over, me and him. seeing you again has affirmed that for me. there hasn't been love between frank and i for a long time. i never loved him the way i love you. i'm ending things as soon as i get back. i promise sana. please- please believe me." you're scrambling a little, you couldn't afford to lose sana again. not after you had just gotten her back.

you can see tears running down the side of her face. you hate yourself for making her cry. that seems to be all you ever made her do.

"okay."

"okay?"

she turns to you again, wiping at her eyes, "okay. i really shouldn't but i love you too much and i've missed you too much to say no."

"really?" your perking up, disbelief clear.

"you keep asking me that and i'll change my mind." she teases, smiling for the first time.

you're overjoyed. rolling onto her and sweeping her up in a kiss, hoping your actions convey your feelings for her better than your words do. she's laughing into you and god have you missed that sound. you attack her sides immediately, almost desperate to hear it again, to make her feel something other than the sadness you've caused her. you make a promise to yourself in that moment, that you'd never, never make sana cry again.

it took you only a month to break that promise.

▂▂⌇

"hi, frank's wife right?"

you resist the very strong urge to roll your eyes, instead nodding politely and listening as the woman who approached you launches into a conversation about her husband and how he and frank got along at work and really you couldn't care less.

you were at the work event frank had mentioned in the morning. he did end up picking up his own dry cleaning and you saw him briefly at the event when you first showed up, only saying a quick hello and kissing your cheek before he was off again mingling and entertaining guests.

you had intended on just sticking to the bar and making use of the free-flow alcohol but now this woman was talking to you about her kids, and whatever else and you really just want to throw your drink in her face and yell at her about how to read a room.

you spot frank in the corner of your eye, surrounded by a group of women. you knew he had slept with other people ever since you stopped accepting his advances and affection. you're honestly surprised he hasn't asked for a divorce yet.

but frank was kinder than you. you were still his friend before you were his wife. he still cared about you and didn't want you to be left alone. you couldn't seem to convince him you were fine alone. you learnt to be fine when sana left. although lately, even he seemed to see you less as a friend and more and more, just as his wife.

▂▂⌇

"i still can't believe that time you thought danny was a good choice for you. and you defended him too!" sana was laughing, slapping your arm playfully.

you whine in response, "i told you i was sorry for that alright!!"

she's still laughing when frank comes back to the two of you, looking at you inquisitively and gesturing vaguely towards sana. you shrug, helping him set the food he had ordered for the three of you on the table.

"what's funny sana?" he asks, sliding into the booth with you and picking up a burger.

sana's waving a chip around now, pointing at you, "just talking about y/n's shitty taste in men."

frank fakes shock, looking at you with an exaggerated look of hurt, "me?"

you laugh, hitting him lightly, "not you dummy."

"yeah you're one of the good ones franky. probably the only good one out there."

"aww thanks sana."

sana grins, digging into her food.

you smile at the two of them. your two favourite people in the world. when you first met frank, you were skeptical of him. you were sure he was only trying to be friends with you to get with sana. so imagine your surprise when he had actually been plotting with sana behind your back to ask you out. you had said yes of course, he was a sweet guy, attractive too, and most importantly, sana liked him.

you ended up hitting it off, and the three of you were almost inseparable after that.

it wasn't until about 7 months into your relationship that sana started distancing herself. she would say she was busy, turn down more offers to go out, start hanging around a new group of people.

you heard from frank later that they had some sort of disagreement, which was why sana had started avoiding you. you were hurt by this though, because sana was still your friend. she was yours before you were frank's, and even when you were frank's you were still hers. didn't she know that? she had to.

you intended for her to know that when you cornered her, a late afternoon on a friday when the three of you used to go out for ice-cream as a reward for the week's end, but she had been staying behind to study or always had something else on instead.

"why are you avoiding me?"

sana's eyes are everywhere, her movements skittish as she tries to look for an escape before giving up and huffing. "i don't know what you're talking about."

"yes you do."

"no i don't."

"stop this sana. frank told me the two of you fought. if you don't want to be around him fine. that's your choice. but that doesn't mean you get to avoid me too."

she looks at you then, eyes fiery, "is that what he told you?"

you nod, "i don't understand sana. i don't care that you fought. i can seperate us and my relationship with frank. you're still my best friend."

"we fought because he told me he felt like i was stealing you from him."

"what?"

"yeah. he said he never got to spend any time with you. i was always there. he felt like he was the one who was third-wheeling our relationship."

the words third-wheel and our relationship swim around in your mind, "w-what? that's impossible!"

"is it really though y/n?" sana's voice is soft now.

"what do you mean?"

"i mean, is it really impossible for you to see us that way? frank obviously did, and he felt threatened by that."

"w-what- sana what are you talking about?"

she sighs a little in frustration, and then suddenly she's yanking you forward by the collar and planting her lips against yours. you react automatically, kissing her back, hands immediately going to her waist as you revel in the feeling of her soft lips against yours. it was always so different kissing sana compared to all the other guys you've been with. you chalked it up to the fact that sana took care of her skin, her lips, the way she smelled, all of that made kissing her that much sweeter.

but then you remember frank and you're pulling away, breaths heavier than they were mere seconds ago. "what the fuck sana?!" you're whipping your head around, looking to see if anyone had seen the two of you. it seemed to be clear.

sana's chuckling lowly, wiping at her lips, face downcast.

"what were you thinking?! i'm with frank! you set me up with frank!"

her eyes meet yours again, and you're taken back by the glassy look on her face. she's whispering, "i know. i know and i hate myself for it. i thought- i thought if- i thought i could get over this if i saw you happy with someone else. and then you were! and i just felt worse y/n. and then frank could tell and that was the last straw i guess. i needed to be away, away from you so i could get make these stupid feelings go away. i'm sorry y/n i'm so so sorry."

you're dumbfounded, staring at her blankly when she starts sobbing, hands coming to wipe at tears falling faster than she could catch them.

you don't understand what this means, what you felt, all you knew in that moment was sana was crying. the person you cared about most in the world was crying and you were the reason for it. so you do the one thing to make her stop. you tilt her chin up, heart breaking at the sniffles and the watery eyes, and you press your lips against hers again.

you end up where you've ended up so many times. legs entangled, sweaty bodies on sheets, heavy breathing, and minds lost.

▂▂⌇

you couldn't stand being inside anymore. it was suffocating.

you breathe out smoke as you exhale, the cigarette end still burning.

you watch as someone makes their way outside, shuffling around a little in their pockets and cursing when they realise they don't have a lighter.

the person looks towards you and you hold out yours. you help them light the end of their cigarette and nod when they mutter their thanks, inhaling the smoke into their lungs and standing awkwardly to the side.

it's a few minutes here in the cold, and you're almost finished your cigarette, about to throw it away when the stranger speaks up.

"do i know you from somewhere?"

you pause, looking back, you don't think you recognise this person. "you must have me confused for someone else, i'm sorry."

"wait... no you're sana's best friend right!?"

you drop the cigarette in your hand in shock. it had been a long time since someone had said that name out loud. she only ever lived in your head, it was hard to believe she was someone to other people too.

"right yes of course i remember now! i'm momo i was sana's roommate in college. although you probably don't remember i think we only really met like once. sana was always with you around campus and posted you a lot though so i remember you."

you vaguely recall the woman as she chatters away excitedly.

"right... momo... it's nice to meet you. i'm y/n."

momo grins, "have you spoken to sana lately? i don't think i saw you at the wedding, although i may have just been drunk." she chuckles a little at herself, not realising the way your face drops.

"wedding?"

momo looks at you a little in confusion, "yeah. last month? sana got married in sapporo."

your head is spinning with the new information. sana was married?

“woah you feeling okay?” momo’s reaching out for your shoulder, steadying you. you didn’t even realise you had lost your balance.

“i-i- yeah sorry.”

“you sure? are you here with anyone? anyone i can call?”

“no. it’s okay, thank you though.”

“yeah no problem.”

she’s shuffling back again, sucking on her cigarette.

“sana and i haven’t spoken in years. i was just a little surprised is all.” you speak up when you feel a little steadier on your feet.

“oh shit! i’m so sorry y/n i had no idea!”

“it’s okay, it seems no one really does.” you laugh a little bitterly.

momo doesn’t know how to respond to this, flicking her eyes between you and the door.

“it’s fine though. i’m happy for her.” the words taste vile on your tongue. is this what sana felt when she watched you walk down the aisle on your wedding day?

momo softens a little, “she is happy.” she offers you a kind smile, tapping out her cigarette and mumbling a quick thanks before heading back inside.

once you're sure she's gone you let yourself break down. sobs wrack your body as you hold your hands over your mouth trying to quiet them. you can barely see through the tears streaming out of your eyes. this was it. you'd finally lost her. you couldn't cling to the delusion that somewhere out there, some of her still belonged to you, some of her happiness, her memories, her love. you'd lost all of that now.

▂▂⌇

"what was that y/n?"

"what?"

"don't fuck with me right now. that was frank wasn't it? on the phone just then?"

you sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose, "what do you want me to say sana?"

"that you're keeping your promise. that you're going to return to him, break up with him, and then you're going to come back here to me. and then we can finally start our lives together."

"it's not that easy sana."

she explodes, "what do you mean?! it is that easy y/n! you told me when you came here that you and frank were over. have been for years. and now you can't tell me that same thing?"

"i don't- no sana-"

"what? what y/n? what’s your excuse now? do you have to make sure your job is secure? after you've spent a whole fucking month here you expect me to think you still care about that? do you have a child with him? is that it? is he sick? what other possible excuse is there for 'it's not that easy sana'?!"

"you don't get it! you can't say that to me sana!"

"what?! what don't i get?! tell me y/n, let's sort this shit out right fucking now. tell me why you can't be with me."

"it's not- that's just the way i am sana! i can't-"

"you told me you loved me. was that a lie then?" her eyes are brimming with tears, anger evident and your heart breaks again. you promised, you promised her and you promised yourself that this wouldn't happen again.

you're quick to step in again, trying to stop her from crying the one way you know how, brushing her cheeks with your thumbs and kissing her.

she doesn't let you get away with it this time though. she rips away from you, placing a hand on your chest and pushing you back lightly, keeping you literally at arm's length.

"don't do that." she's chuckling, her laughs mixed in with quiet sobs, "don't think you can just kiss away your problems. that's not how real life works y/n."

"please sana, please just-"

"what? you want me to be okay being your secret again? you want to be able to go around in public with frank only to come home to me? you can't have both y/n! i'm not going to do that again for you!"

you’re both crying now, standing across from each other in sana’s apartment, a place that’s felt more like home to you in a month than your place with frank has felt for you in six years.

your voice comes out in a hoarse whisper when you speak up, “i can’t- i can’t feel like this sana.”

sana’s wiping at her eyes with the sleeve of her sweater. then she’s turning on her heel and heading into the bedroom.

you follow her, you’d follow her anywhere, but your heart sinks when you realise she’s going around the room picking up your belongings and shoving them into your bag.

“w-wait s-sana, what- what are you doing? stop please-“

you’re almost begging, scrambling after her trying to pull her back but she’s stubborn, she’s able to fill the bag within a minute and then she’s pushing it into you, and out the door.

“please! sana please i can’t lose you again don’t do this please- you’re my best friend sana.”

she’s managed to successfully push you out the front door now, still crying. “but you’re not mine y/n. you were never my best friend. you were always the love of my life. and you can’t be that for me anymore. so leave. please. don’t try and find me again.”

“n-no sana please d-don’t-“

“you’d have to stop the world just to stop what you feel for me y/n. but you don’t realise that. and i’m sick of loving someone who can’t give me all of that love back.”

and then she’s slamming her door shut in your face, the both of you sobbing on opposite sides of the door, hearts shattered a second time, and later, when it happens a third time, it’s only the sound of yours breaking.

#sana #minatozaki sana #twice sana #sana x reader #twice sana x reader #sana x fem!reader #sana x f!reader #twice x reader #twice x fem!reader #twice x f!reader #twice imagines #sana imagines #royaltozaki

[sxcret-garden]

4th Desire ღ Hush, My Dear [M]

ღ Aspects of Desire series ღ Ateez Jongho x fem!reader ღ words: ~5.8k ღ genre: established relationship, college AU, fluff, some humor, slice of life, a bit of angst, smut (dom!Jongho, sub!reader, semi-public (they have to keep quiet cause reader’s family is literally in the other room), quickie, clothed sex, fingering, unprotected sex, pain kink, biting (idol receiving), he’s lowkey mean… again askjfkljas, orgasm denial, praise) ღ warnings: reader has a difficult relationship with her family, mentions of her mother trying to convince her to wear a dress to an event even though reader doesn’t like wearing them, mentions of a bad experience Jongho had in his past relationship, (him running his fingers through reader’s hair)

Desc.: Dinner with your family goes about as you expected - you’re slightly uncomfortable because of their choices in conversation topics and very much bored. Luckily, your boyfriend tagged along and knows just how to make you feel better, and in the process he too seems to be able to finally let go of his worries.

Author's note: This has a bit of a different pacing than the chapters so far... fun fact! It's also the first chapter I wrote for this fic... no I don't write them in order, that would be way too simple kalsdjflksda

← prev chapter ღ next chapter →

“Necklace or no necklace?” you ask, raising your voice a little so your boyfriend would hear you in the other room. You hear footsteps, and not much later his figure appears in the doorframe to his room, where you’re looking yourself in the big mirror next to his wardrobe, trying to decide what to wear.

“Y/N…” he mutters your name, and as you shoot his reflection behind you a look, you immediately respond,

“I know…”

“It’s just your family,” he says it nevertheless and he walks over to you. Coming to a halt right behind you, his palms find your waist as he lets his gaze take in your figure through the mirror. “You don’t have to dress up for them.”

“I know,” you say once again, peeling yourself out of his hold in order to walk over to the far end of the closet, pulling out yet another different necklace. “This one?” you ask and Jongho gives you a huff, a sympathetic smile showing on his face.

“Did you hear what I said?” he questions, coming closer to put his hand above yours. “Wear what’s comfortable. Your parents won’t expect you to look like you’re going to some big event.”

“Well you’re the one talking…” You shoot his outfit a look - neat black pants paired with a knitted sweater in dark colors and a button-up shirt underneath it. You can tell he put at least some thought behind it.

“Hey,” his gums show as he smiles at you. “I’m trying to leave a good impression on your parents, okay? You’re their daughter, not the boyfriend who needs to make sure they like him,” he chuckles.

“They already love you. You could show up in pajamas and they’d be fine with it,” you retort.

“I wouldn’t take it that far.” You put the necklaces back to their assigned space in your boyfriend’s wardrobe, before closing its doors. You decide against wearing one after all.

“Actually… we still have time, so I want to ask you something,” you start, turning towards him. “Let’s sit down first?”

“Sure.” You notice by the way his stance changes ever so slightly that your partner can sense you have a more or less serious question. Really, you’re just curious about something that’s been on your mind for a while now. Making yourselves comfortable in the living room, you clear your throat and pose your question.

“You’re being very careful… ever since we started experimenting more while having sex,” you state. “And I appreciate that! It’s just making me wonder if there’s a reason to that, other than for general safety’s sake? Because I feel like you really don’t have to check in with me as many times as you do.” You were afraid he might not share your opinion on this, and feel criticized for something that seems perfectly reasonable to him. But to your relief he seems to know what you’re trying to say.

“Ah… you’re right,” Jongho responds, and then he thinks for a while. “There is a reason for that, actually,” he then says. You guess it might have something to do with his previous girlfriend, and it looks like you’re correct in that assumption. “I told you about how me and my ex tried going in that direction too, right?”

“Right.” The way he suddenly becomes very serious makes you tense up as well - it’s like a barely noticeable darkness reflecting in his gaze.

“So we didn’t want the same things… a lot of the time. There was this one specific thing - I’ll spare you the details here - that she kept wanting to try out but I always said no because it felt too risky for me.”

“Makes sense.”

“And one day we were out with friends, drinking.” You have a hunch what his story might lead up to, and you furrow your eyebrows as you listen on. “And we came home tipsy. Not totally drunk, we were still aware of what we were doing, but also not sober. And this time I gave in, thinking if it’s something that will give my partner pleasure, it will be fine.”

“It wasn’t fine…?” you guess, and a short and regretful laugh escapes him.

“No…”

“Oh,” you breathe.

“I hurt her that day. Not seriously, and not permanently. But it could’ve been avoided… and I think that’s why I’m being so extra careful with you. I swore to myself after that, that I wouldn’t do certain things if I’ve had something to drink or I’m too tired.” He glances up at you now, one finger swiping his hair covering his face to the side as his features soften, and he looks at you as if you were the most precious thing he’s ever laid eyes on. “But I guess I’m more afraid of hurting you than I thought I was.”

“So that’s why…” you respond. “I thought you were overdoing it a bit,” you admit. “But now I get why you’re so focused on making sure I’m okay at all times… thank you.” Grasping his hands in yours now, you look him right in the face. “I mean it. Thank you for keeping me safe.” He can only watch and blush when you bring your joint hands up, brushing a kiss onto his knuckles with your lips. “But now I’m wondering… can you enjoy it like that? I mean.. it must be stressful to always carry that fear with you.” There’s a complicated expression on his face now, and he hesitates for a second before he speaks.

“Yes and no,” he answers honestly. “I am enjoying it, please don’t misunderstand! But… yeah, I think you noticed that overall I’m not letting go as much as I might be able to without those fears. Except for last time…”

“When I called you-”

“Yeah.” He doesn’t let you say it out loud, and you wonder why. Does it really affect him that much?

“Then…” You give him a reassuring smile. “When you’re ready to let go of that fear, you can. I trust that you won’t hurt me. And I promise I will say something if you’ve overstepped a boundary or I feel unsure about something. Okay?”

“Okay,” he mouths. You get up to take a step towards him, closing the distance between the two of you, and you put your arms around him, bringing your hand up into his hair as he leans into your embrace. “Sorry for overcomplicating things and not telling you sooner,” he mutters, but you shake your head.

“No, it’s okay,” you reassure him, fingers combing through his locks. “You have a very good reason. Don’t feel pressured to go against your gut feeling, okay?”

“Okay. Thank you too for understanding.”

You remain like this for a while, and the longer you stay in this position, the harder it becomes to tear yourself away from the warmth of the hug. However, eventually you force yourself to step back anyway, because it is soon time to make your way to your parent’s place.

It’s half past 6 on this Saturday when the two of you arrive at your destination to have dinner with your parents and your grandparents. The invitation had come suddenly, and not completely unrelated to your cousin revealing that she and her long-time boyfriend would get married soon. Your mother had already warned you over the phone that she wanted to discuss some “details” with you, and that you and Jongho should come over for dinner on the weekend. You could only guess that those details would be mostly about trying to convince you what you should wear for the occasion according to her, and once you arrive at your childhood home, it doesn’t take long for that fear to come true. 

“Oh my, who do we have here?” your mother greets you and, mostly, your boyfriend, who she seems to like a lot. It’s really no secret that ever since you first introduced him to her, she too wishes her daughter would get married soon. Though you’re nowhere near ready for taking such a huge step, so whenever the topic arises, you do your best to quickly switch to a different one. However, today her concerns aren’t of your marital status, but of - as you had guessed - your planned outfit for your cousin’s wedding. 

Pulling you aside after making sure everyone else is seated at the dinner table, entertaining themselves with a conversation about who knows what, her demeanor immediately changes and she becomes serious.

“So, Y/N…” The moment she calls you by your name, you startle just a little bit. “I’ve been thinking.” Whenever she uses that line, you know something uncomfortable is about to go down.

“What is it?” you reply, acting as if you didn’t already know the answer.

“For your cousin’s wedding… you’re not gonna show up in that suit again, right?” Memories of the last occasion you decided to go with neat dark blue dress pants and a fitting blazer instead of the dress that multiple people apparently expected you to wear come back to you and you gulp. 

“I was going to,” you say, and your mother sighs. It’s a condescending sigh, one that’s supposed to tell you how naive and young you are and how you should trust your mother’s words, who surely knows better. 

“You should wear a dress at least for her wedding,” she says. “Don’t you think? I mean… every young woman there is going to wear one!”

“How do you know that?” you dare to talk back at her, but she raises her eyebrows at you in response. Evading your question, she continues,

“You’re so young and such a pretty girl! It would be a waste if you went in pants.” With a bitter taste in your mouth and a glance towards the living room where the conversation seems to be dying down a bit, you retort,

“Mom, can we talk about this another time? I think everyone’s waiting for us to join…” Not expecting your attempt at getting out of this uncomfortable conversation to work, you’re surprised when she gives in and you find her agreeing with you. 

“Okay, I’ll call you about it during the week. Don’t even think about not picking up!” she adds, lifting a finger as a silent warning, and then she lets you off the hook, walking into the living room where everyone else is gathered. Letting out a deep sigh, you too follow.

Eventually you reach the part of the evening where the conversations of your family members are starting to bore you. Just because you've moved past the uncomfortable questions (at least you know your mother won’t bother you about your outfit for the wedding in front of the others) doesn't mean you feel particularly up for engaging in their small talk and occasional political debate. If you're being completely honest, you just might've been fine if it was only the small talk.

Yet here you are, watching your parents and grandparents argue about economics and politicians, and from the way Jongho is reaching over to place his hand on your thigh and gives it a gentle squeeze as he tries not to frown too much at what's unfolding at the table, you can tell he notices your discomfort too. And it's not like you didn't warn him, it's not like he didn't assure you multiple times that it's fine, he doesn't mind, he wants to come to your family dinner anyway. But now you can't help but feel apologetic to him. 

As if he knew what's going through your head when you shoot him a look, your eyebrows furrowed, he shakes his head and leans in to whisper in your ear,

"Are you okay?" Frankly, you're not okay per se. Used to this is what you are, and equating one with the other in your mind, you give him a weak nod.

"They'll stop... eventually," you whisper back, so the people in question wouldn't hear. And they really do stop a mere moment later. To your dismay, they pause their noise only to comment on you and your boyfriend instead.

"The two lovebirds... look at how they can't wait until they're alone." It's your grandma of all people who makes the comment, a knowing grin sitting on her face and you feel uncomfortable. You know it's just how people act when they see a young couple - they tease. But that doesn't mean you particularly appreciate what's probably just an expression of them being happy for you.

"Mom!" your mother exclaims and everyone laughs. You glance over at Jongho, and you see him smiling along to their bickering. It's a polite smile, nothing more, because he knows how much you hate receiving this kind of attention.

"Well it's true, isn't it?" your grandma defends herself, the creases around her eyes deepening with mischief. "We were like this too when we were their age." Now she shoots your grandpa a look, one filled with warmth as he gives her a somewhat awkward laugh because of her straightforwardness, and then puts his arm around her frame to pull her in close for a moment. You can't help but wonder if you too will still be as in love with your partner once you've reached their age, and your gaze naturally wanders over to your boyfriend sitting next to you. The familiar sight of his smile, the way he lowers his head ever so slightly because after all he's still a little shy around your family, and the way he sits up straight the exact moment your father asks him a question to start a conversation all fill your chest with warmth. Without thinking, he lets his palm glide up and down your thigh once as he answers, and just as you're about to put your hand above his, he deprives you of his touch, gesturing along with the way he talks instead. You listen to them chat as the rest of the family returns to political debates, and in your father's face you can unmistakably see that, just like your mother, he's taking a liking to your boyfriend, and it fills you with relief. And yet you soon find your mind drifting off again, wondering what would happen if your boyfriend put his hand back on your thigh, letting it wander just a bit higher. Wondering how far he could technically go without anyone else at the table noticing - though you know he’d never cross the line in front of other people. And so instead you fantasize about how he would continue unknowingly riling you up, or maybe he’d be aware of it, he is Jongho after all. He’d tease you and keep an eye on you all while making sure to keep the conversation going naturally, so that not a single soul would even guess that you’re craving for him to touch you, and he’s craving for you to beg for it. And then, after dinner is finally over, he’d pull you to another room, and-

Jongho’s hand actually returning to your thigh pulls you out of your thoughts, and as he glances over to you, noticing how your mind is drifting off further and further from the conversation at the dinner table, he moves his palms a little more towards the inside of your leg. You almost startle at the sensation, and at what it inevitably stirs up inside of you, and so you turn to look at him. As soon as you do, you find him already staring back at you, the expression on his face having changed almost unnoticeably. He leans in to mutter something in your ear again, and with it, his fingertips move towards your middle just a bit, sparking desire deep inside you once again.

"Shall we get out of here for a minute?" Thankful for his suggestion, you nod, and with the excuse of you having a headache along with assuring everyone that you'll be fine, you just need some quiet, so as to prevent anyone from following you two, he leads you out of the living room and towards the bathroom at the other end of the corridor. As soon as you close the door behind you, locking up as well, he pulls you towards him by the hand he's already holding.

"You okay?" he asks, his eyes wandering to your lips instinctively, and with his free hand he captures your chin.

"Whatever..." you breathe.

"Don't say that," your boyfriend retorts, tilting his head to the side a little, now looking you in the eyes instead. "I can tell you kept zoning out in the middle of their conversations."

"Can you blame me?" You give him a huff and a weak smile as you look away and he lets go of your chin to comb his fingers through your hair instead.

"No, to be honest." Now he as well shows you an apologetic smile. "What were you thinking about when trying to drown out the sound of their arguing?" 

"Just... nothing much," you answer, suddenly worried about whether he saw right through you or if his question didn't have so much meaning behind it after all.

"You sure? I noticed that you were upset when I took my hand away earlier... you sure it was nothing much?" You gulp at his tone, the way his voice alone reveals that he very much has a pretty good guess about what you've been fantasizing about for most of the evening. And at the same time he's now taking a step towards you, forcing you to back away and eventually your behind hits the edge of the sink, with your boyfriend now towering above you.

"I..." you try to say something, but it seems your body language already tells him everything he needs to know, because now he's placing one hand on the small of your back as he leans in, his lips hovering just beside your ear.

"Cause I've been thinking about dragging you off to somewhere else and putting you in a better mood for a whole while now." You swallow thickly, and when he takes a proper look at your face to see your reaction to his words, all you can do is part your lips and whisper a confession.

"Me too." He retrieves his hand from behind you, his palm wandering to your sides and then to your front, dragging it up across your chest and letting his fingertips graze your throat on its journey to finally cupping your face. Your eyelids flutter shut almost instantly as his thumb brushes across your bottom lip, and then he leans in, coming to a halt a mere inch apart from you.

"Want me to entertain you for a bit?" His enticing offer leaves you unable to do anything but nod, and when you take a glance at his face you don't miss the look he’s giving you, knowing he already has you under his spell. However, Jongho doesn't leave you much time to think about it as he kisses you slowly, a pace meant solely to make you crave for more. You throw your arms around his shoulders as you let him part your lips to deepen the kiss, and still it ends too soon. The pleading expression in your eyes only makes him chuckle, but for now he gives you what you undeniably want and he kisses you again. 

His hands wander towards your hips eventually, and after pulling down your pants and underwear just enough for comfortable access, one of his hands keeps you in place while the other finds your core. A mere finger, dragged up and down your folds painfully slowly, is enough to have you moan into his kiss, and next thing you know he pulls back and ceases all motions. Shaking his head at you, he mutters,

"They might hear us."

"R-right..." you whisper an answer, already having forgotten all about your family still chatting merrily not too far away from you. 

"Let's be careful," Jongho says, shushing you while momentarily removing his hand from your side. Not letting you wait, he continues his teasing motions, and you bite your bottom lip as you try not to make a sound under his touch and his more than curious gaze scanning even the tiniest of your reactions. "What?" he whispers, a somewhat mocking tone in his voice. "Didn't think you'd already be that wet just from thinking about me all evening." And before you can even come up with anything to say in your defense, he dips a finger inside you quite effortlessly, and your hips instinctively buck into his hand. The act makes him smirk, and he pushes you back into the edge of the sink to keep you from moving around. Clicking his tongue at you as quietly as he possibly can while the amusement in his gaze is apparent, he says,

"So impatient." Furrowing your brows, you shoot him a pleading expression that causes his features to soften, and he adds another finger. "That what you want?" Nodding, you can see his eyes growing darker, and you squeeze yours tightly shut as he watches on, slowly pumping his fingers in and out of you. "Feels so good, hm?" he keeps talking, his voice low and quiet, and you dig your fingertips into the fabric of his shirt where it covers his shoulders.

"Y-yeah..." you answer, doing everything in your might to keep your volume at a whisper.

"Shh," he, however, shushes you. "Don't talk. You don't wanna risk getting caught, do you?" And so you do as he says, merely shaking your head vigorously, and earning yourself a kiss brushed against your lips.

"Good girl." And then he picks up the pace just a bit, thumb now pressed against your clit, and the way he curls his fingers against that perfect spot deep inside you makes your head spin.

"Fuck," you mouth, and you earn a sharp look from your boyfriend, but he keeps going nonetheless. You can feel your knees getting weak as you melt under his touch, heatwaves rushing through your body with every time he pulls out and pushes back inside. And then, just as your high starts building up in your stomach and you throw your head back, he pulls out just as slowly as he started. For a second you stare at him blankly, but when he takes a step back, you immediately find yourself protesting.

"Don't do this... not now, please..." You can tell exactly how satisfied he is with himself for riling you up like that and then withdrawing just as you were about to find your sweet release by the cocky grin he's giving you, head leaned back ever so slightly so he could triumphantly look down at you even better.

"Why?" he asks. "It's far too risky to let you lose control. Remember?" He leans in closer now, his fingers that have just been inside your pussy merely a few seconds ago now brushing against your lips just before he leans in, the tip of his tongue licking your juices off your mouth. "They might hear us." Unable to say a word, all you can do is reach out for him, cling to him as he tries to walk backwards.

"No, please... baby... need you so bad..." You press your thighs together tightly as you speak those words, his gaze immediately dropping down to your legs as he registers the movement, and as his pupils darken, he slowly lets his eyes wander back up to your face.

"Then what do you want?" 

"Just fuck me please... do whatever you want but please fuck me..." 

"Love..." he calls out to you rather softly now, quite in contrast to the firm grip on your ass that he pulls you towards him with. You suck in a breath as you can unmistakably feel his bulge against your lower stomach, but Jongho doesn't waver. "I don't think you can keep quiet if I do whatever I want with you."

"I can... please..." you push him, and he seems to ponder on your plea for a moment. Just when he lets go of you, you think this is it, you're not getting what you want tonight, but then you see him unzip his own pants, and before you can think any further, he orders, 

"Turn around." You don't hesitate. All you do is do as he says, facing yourself in the mirror as you bend over the sink as far as the insufficient space between its edge and the glass surface in front of you lets you. You can see his eyes being glued to you from behind, one hand moving to your back and pulling your shirt up as your boyfriend moves it towards your shoulders, while he's giving himself a few strokes with the other. His palm wanders back down, fingertips tracing your spine, and you arch your back for him as he follows your shape, eventually letting his hand rest on your ass.

"That's right," he mutters, rubbing circles onto your skin before squeezing the flesh. For a second there you prepare yourself for impact, but he's already steadying your hips, aligning himself with your cunt. Even just his tip parting your folds makes you shudder, and so he leans forward, until he can comfortably place his hand over your mouth.

"Is it okay if I do that?" he asks, whispering, and you nod your head in desperation. At this point you think you'd comply with almost anything if only he finally filled you up, and at the same time you feel warmth spreading in your chest as he checks in on you and makes sure you're comfortable. And then he pushes up into you, forcing you to bite down a moan that would've almost escaped, and you find yourself agreeing with his earlier words. There really is no way in hell you could keep quiet when he has his way with you. And yet you manage to keep it down as he settles inside you with his full size.

"One sound and I won't let you cum, got that?" he warns, and you can barely nod as he begins rolling his hips into you. Though he starts slow, he too seems close to losing his composure as he picks up speed, using you to chase his own high as well. And even though the pleasure keeps gradually building up deep inside of you, you can keep it together so far. However, when his other hand lets go of your hips so he could rub circles against your clit instead, you know he's about to drive you insane. And so, as a moan threatens to escape your throat, you do the only other thing you can think of as an alternative - you sink your teeth into the palm of his hand. With him bringing you closer to the edge with every repetition of his movements, you don't pay attention to the impact of your actions, but when you bite down harder you can suddenly hear your boyfriend hissing a curse above you.

"Fuck..." Finding the reflection of his face in the mirror and the way his features distort in pleasure as he fucks you harder only causes you to apply even more force to how you’re biting down on his palm, and in turn he tightens his grip on your face. Squeezing your eyes shut as you're about to roll them back from all the sensations coursing through your body, your orgasm comes crashing down on you, shaking you whole. Only a mere second later, a strained grunt escapes your boyfriend as he cums inside you, halting at once to allow for you both to come down from your highs.

He pulls out carefully as you release his hand, and grabbing a few paper towels, he begins cleaning you up. With one arm around your waist he helps you stand, the other wiping clean the insides of your thighs, making you shake whenever he grazes your still sensitive core. 

"You okay?" he asks finally, placing a kiss just below your ear as he holds you close, letting you rest with your back against his chest.

"Yeah..." you whisper, before remembering his hand. "What about you?" You turn around, reaching for his wrist to take a closer look at his palm, only to find very apparent bite marks there. You can't help but snort at the situation, remarking, "Well, I guess it's not the noise we need to worry about now." 

"Ah... right..." Taking a look at the mark himself, an embarrassed smile now graces his face, gums showing as his ears take on a soft shade of pink. You take a hold of his hand again, bringing it up to your mouth now.

"It's okay," you say, blowing some cool air onto it, before placing gentle kisses all over the mark. "I'll make it better."

You return to the table significantly later than what would’ve been a timespan where you could be sure nobody would get suspicious, but thankfully the only question you receive is whether your “headache” is better now or not as everyone’s busy cleaning up the table. Your boyfriend immediately takes a heavy looking stack of dirty plates from your mother’s hands and carries them to the kitchen instead, and once again it makes you happy to see what a good impression your parents have of him. 

“You really picked a good guy, Y/N,” your mother tells you as she moves over closer to you, and you agree silently as you glance over to where his back is disappearing in the kitchen. Caught up in your feelings, you startle as she claps her hands together next to you, the loud sound immediately makes you look at her. “You get to work too! You’re gonna have to be a good wife to him!”

“Mom!” you call out, finding several things that bother you about that sentence, but in the end only addressing one. “We haven’t even been dating for that long!”

“Oh,” she throws one hand over her mouth, before smiling with a hint of mischief in her eyes, just like your grandma had done earlier. “Sorry, I got ahead of myself. But can you blame me?” Now putting her hand on your shoulder, she points in the direction of the kitchen, and following her movement with your eyes, your gaze soon comes to rest on your boyfriend, who gives you a smile upon noticing.

“Jongho,” you call out to him to make him come over to you. “Can you tell my mom to stop simping over you?”

“What?” they ask, in unison, but very much for different reasons, as your boyfriend can’t help but smile in amusement, whereas your mother adds, “What’s simping…?” And before you can explain, your boyfriend chimes in,

“It’s a good thing, I promise.” 

“Ah, well,... either way, someone’s gonna have to get dessert ready, and I assume it’s not your father,” your mother switches topic, shooting you a look. And then, glancing at Jongho and then back to you, she adds, “But that won’t be a problem you’re gonna have, right?” Walking away with that, she leaves you to protest in vain and to internally die of embarrassment, and when you see your boyfriend merely laughing at the situation, you’re not sure if that makes it better or worse. 

“God, I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t have brought you here…” you mutter, but he shakes his head, one arm snaking around your body loosely.

“Don’t worry, I’m okay,” he tries to reassure you, and yet your mood won’t change.

“But I’m not… I hate it when they are like this. They act like we’re already married…”

“Hey…” He pulls you aside, fingertips dancing down your arms until he takes a hold of your hands. “They like me. That’s a good thing, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, I guess…” you say, averting your gaze because you really don’t want to keep discussing this, but at the same time you can’t shake the feeling that they’re taking this too far too quickly. And instead of dwelling on the topic, your boyfriend now finds reason to complain about something entirely different.

“You guess?” he asks, his tone making it sound like he’s upset, but the playful spark in his gaze as he raises his eyebrows at you tells you he’s just fooling around. 

“I mean… no, it’s a good thing,” you correct yourself, shooting him a thankful smile for attempting to cheer you up and then letting him pull you into a quick hug, before your mother starts calling everyone to the dinner table again in order to have dessert. It’s self-made chocolate cake, sweet just as you like it, and even though you know it couldn’t possibly match your boyfriend’s tastes, he still finishes his entire plate.

“This is why they like you so much,” you mutter eventually, when people start moving again to get ready for bed. “You’re risking a tummy ache just to make them happy.” He can’t say anything to that, having been caught red-handed by you, who wouldn’t not know his ulterior motive behind forcing himself through sugary hell. So instead, you get up, touching his shoulder lightly as you do. “Let’s get ready for bed too?”

You help your mother put the remaining plates and cutlery into the dishwasher before brushing your teeth and eventually moving to your old room with your boyfriend. Making yourselves comfortable under your blanket which is that much fluffier than the one you’re using at his place, you immediately feel sleep tugging at your bones and you let out a content sigh.

“Say…” you mumble, facing him as you’re both rolled over onto your sides. “You didn’t seem so anxious about possibly hurting me today.”

“Oh, you’re right,” he whispers a response, sounding as if he hadn’t really noticed that fact himself.

“Is it because we didn’t have much time?” you ask, grinning at the thought of your dirty little secret that you’re keeping from everyone else in the house. Jongho thinks for a short while, but then he shakes his head along with an “mh-mh” coming from his side.

“Because I trust you.” Your smile widens at his words. “I think the trust that you’ll say no if you want me to stop is finally bigger than the fear of accidentally hurting you…”

“That’s good,” you respond, reaching out to place your palm onto his cheek, squishing it lightly between your fingers and contrary to the expected reaction, Jongho merely raises his eyebrows at you slowly, as if he couldn’t properly process what you just did. Letting go of him, you move your hand towards the back of his head instead and your partner shows you a delayed shy smile. “I’m really glad for that,” you whisper, before you roll onto your back and he reaches out for your hand in order to place a goodnight kiss onto the back of it.

“Me too.”

#ateez smut #jongho smut #ateez x reader #ateez x fem reader #ateez x you #ateez scenarios #ateez imagines #ateez series #ateez drabbles #jongho imagines #jongho x reader #smut

[notmyneighbor]

sway | female doppel reader x francis mosses

rating | explicit

words | 4.2k

alcohol, cigarettes, sexual content

ao3 link

The hotel cocktail lounge is like an open buffet for doppelgangers.

You’d really lucked out cloning that young, attractive, newly hired lounge singer, disposing of the original before she could cause any trouble. While so many of your brethren struggled to get into the heavily guarded, overcrowded apartments for shelter (and food, of course) you had the better fortune of landing a job at the swanky city hotel with the added bonus of a room upstairs to reside in. Working smarter, not harder.

Sure, you might not enjoy the aftertaste of all that alcohol that’s saturated the humans’ systems but hey, it’s still easy pickings for a hungry invader like yourself. You have a set of genuine documents that verify your identity, pilfered from your victim. No one even bothers to screen in the lounge, because if you’ve made it that far inside, it was too late to worry about it. The identification cards are still required, though, ensuring you’re the legal age to drink. Funny, what humans thought important, when their world was being devoured right out from under them.

Perhaps the most impressive feature of your stolen life is the fact that you actually like your new employment.

At first you’d balked at the idea of working for the humans, but you’ve really started to warm to it lately. You enjoy the music. The pretty gowns you get to wear. The admiring stares which you return easily. Meat regarding meat, right? The ones you liked the least became your next meal, lured to the parking lot, the side alley, hell, you’d even snacked on one in a housekeeping closet. You were careful to space feedings apart, though. Discreet. You’re not going to fuck up a good thing like this.

There’s a new customer at the bar tonight. You’ve been here long enough now to recognize who’s a local and who’s passing through, the regulars and the fleeting visitors. Another reason this was such a good place to hunt for prey—so many people coming and going. You tried to leave the locals alone and fix your sights more on the traveling folks instead. Their absences could be more readily explained. No one would notice them missing right away, and by the time they did, well, it was much too late.

In spite of the fact that he’s a newcomer to the establishment, you recognize the milkman that’s seated at the far end of the bar as a local. He looks as if he’s come straight from his job, with undereyes so smudged it seems as if he’s been working in a coal mine, not delivering dairy products. The bowtie around his neck is loosened and draped in careless wrinkles, the top button of his shirt undone. His cap is on the counter, next to a pack of cigarettes and a book of matches. After a few rounds the man serving alcohol had finally just left the bottle. You’ve been served free vodka between sets, clear like water but damn, that taste. You’d have to be pretty desperate to force that down straight on the regular.

Still, you nod your thanks and glance at the stranger again. He’s completely focused on the drink. Shame that, because the more you look at him, the more you find yourself appreciating his appearance. As wretchedly exhausted as his features are, there’s still something oddly appealing about his face. You study the way he swirls the liquid in the glass before taking a contemplative sip, the movement of the pronounced arch of his throat as he swallows it down. You’ve never thought of the humans as attractive before, but this one…

It wasn’t completely unheard of for doppels to have some fun with the inhabitants of this planet. It wasn’t always just copying, killing, eating. You yourself have never indulged. No one has captured your attention like this. Maybe it’s because he disregards you so strongly. Immune to the charms you’ve replicated. What was it he liked in a girl? You could make yourself look like anyone he might desire. The ideal lover, really. A new face and body to suit every mood.

There are other customers already gathering at your elbows, praising your singing talents, your beauty. You smile and murmur polite gratitude but you’re not interested in any of them. It’s that milkman you want.

Your target polishes off the last of the glass in front of him, dragging the back of his wrist across his mouth. He reaches for the sealed pack of cigarettes now, tapping the box against his palm to pack the tobacco tighter before peeling off the plastic wrapper and flipping the cardboard top open. He withdraws one of the cylinders inside and tucks it between his lips, next seeking out the book of matches. Red phosphorous struck, you can detect the faintest scent of it as the match is lit, the end of the cigarette now aflame, the match shaken violently until it’s extinguished, then tossed into the ash tray nearby.

Now your eyes follow the path of that lit paper roll, tucked between the middle and index fingers, brought to his mouth, the deep inhale and then exhale, a thin white stream of smoke clouding the air in front of him.

For a moment you allow yourself to indulge in imagining yourself sitting next to him. Lifting that cap off the counter and placing it on your own head, teasing him to retrieve it, staying just out of reach. Getting closer. Walking your fingers up his sleeve. Playfully tugging the cigarette free from his fingers and slotting it into your own mouth. You don’t truly understand the humans’ fondness for the nicotine laced tubes. You’ve never tried one yourself, only in a second hand kind of way after you’ve chomped on someone who indulges in the habit. But this man made it look appealing. You’re wondering at the taste. At the way it feels to breathe those substances inside.

Your name is called—not your real name, of course, but the identity you’d stolen. The manager, reminding you it’s time you retook the stage, break time over. There is some polite clapping, some whistles. The lighting changes as you take up your position behind the microphone on the stand, nodding to the musicians behind you. You have copies of all of the artist’s whose songs you’re covering in your room, an extensive selection of records. You’d learned the lyrics easily, and if you messed up during performance, no one seemed to mind much. The place was more about a feeling. A relaxed, languid kind of atmosphere. Unwinding after a long day of work. Taking a respite during travel. It’s Dean Martin’s sultry crooning you adopt now, your fingers stroking the stand as gently as if you might caress a lover.

When marimba rhythms start to play

Dance with me, make me sway

Like a lazy ocean hugs the shore

Hold me close, sway me more

You move your hips gently in time to the music. The light catches on the sequins of your emerald gown, making them sparkle. It’s low cut, molded to the curves of your body. You glance over at the man still seated with his back to you. You’re going to get this man to turn around and pay attention, one way or another.

Like a flower bending in the breeze

Bend with me, sway with ease

When we dance you have a way with me

Stay with me, sway with me

You’ve descended the stage, bringing the microphone with you. Each table is draped in a white cloth, with a candle centerpiece. You move around the room, gifting attention to patrons at random, batting your eyelashes or blowing kisses from your painted lips. It’s all for show, all smoke and mirrors, concealing what your true intentions are.

Other dancers may be on the floor

Dear, but my eyes will see only you

Only you have the magic technique

When we sway I go weak

The range for the wireless mic is limited, so you can only travel so far. Your milkman is frustratingly out of reach, for the moment.

I can hear the sounds of violins

Long before it begins

Make me thrill as only you know how

Sway me smooth, sway me now

You return to the stage, and the tired looking human has finally turned on the bar stool to regard your performance. He hadn’t been here during your first set. It seems you’ve finally made him take notice. Your eyes lock with his as you sing the chorus.

Other dancers may be on the floor

Dear, but my eyes will see only you

Only you have the magic technique

When we sway I go weak

The stage lights snap off in time to the music, your fellow artists pausing for a dramatic effect before resuming playing as you reach the final verse, the lights now focused solely on you.

I can hear the sounds of violins

Long before it begins

Make me thrill as only you know how

Sway me smooth, sway me now

Applause. More wolf whistles and cat calls. You smile and thank the patrons, your gaze once again flicking toward the man at the bar. The cigarette in his mouth has been forgotten, the charred end lengthening, threatening to drop off on its own. He hasn’t touched the glass that he’d poured before you began singing.

You’ve got him.

***

If there’s one thing you’ve learned about the males of any species, it’s that the more you ignore them, the more they pursue you.

So you don’t follow up on the progress you’ve made with the milkman that first evening. Truth be told, you’re starting to get hungry, and the sweating man with the shifty eyes at the rear of the lounge looks like he’ll keep you satisfied for a couple of days, at least. It’s all too easy to convince the human male to follow you into the recesses of the alley between the hotel building and the warehouse next door, your actions concealed by the rows of dumpsters when your impromptu ‘date’ turns into a meeting with teeth and claws.

You get a night off from work in between sessions, allowing other acts the chance to perform, but word of mouth is quickly spreading your borrowed name as the favorite. It’s you the customers really want to see.

Wednesday evening arrives and your milkman is back. A beer in front of him now. No cigarettes today. He looks a little less rumpled. Bowtie fastened. His eyes are still bruised looking, though. Did the man ever sleep?

You’ve got a little time before you’re due to begin. You’re not supposed to favor any one particular patron, but you figure you’re a big enough attraction now that you’ve earned a little autonomy. You saunter to the bar—he’s chosen the same seat again—and lean against the counter. Today you’re clad in ebony. Same shape as the dress you’d worn previously, hugging your figure and leaving little to the imagination with its tight fit, the teasing bits of skin exposed through the slit of the skirt, the low dip of the bodice and the narrow straps keeping the sparkling garment hooked on your otherwise bare shoulders daring anyone to resist that offered temptation.

This delivery driver doesn’t look. He’s too polite for that, apparently, even though the way you’re leaning would allow him a great view of your décolletage. Or maybe he’s too shy. There’s a nice bit of color in his cheeks, blossoming after you’d approached, and you don’t think alcohol is solely responsible for that effect.

You reach for the ID card he’s left beside his cap, dropped there after entering the lounge. “Francis Mosses,” you read out loud, thumb smoothing over the DDD logo in the corner, eyes roving over the expiration date. The cards and the entry requests were tricky to get just right, especially if you didn’t know your target well enough or if the doorman was too astute. Or just plain overzealous. You wonder how many innocent humans had been unintentionally eradicated by the very person that was supposed to be screening for invaders and protecting them from harm.

“You go by Frankie? Or Frank?”

“My…my mom used to call me that. Frankie,” he adds for clarification. His cheeks are scarlet now.

You smirk, tapping the card on the counter. “Hmmm. But you’re not a little boy anymore, are you, Francis? All grown up now.” You boldly reach for the beer on the counter, taking a swig directly from the bottle. It tastes as putrid as all the alcohol you’ve sampled thus far, but that’s not why you’re imbibing it. The milkman stares at you, transfixed by your every movement.

“Better keep this somewhere safe. Wouldn’t want this to fall into the wrong hands—or claws—would we?” You rest a hand on one shoulder, tucking the card into the pocket of his work shirt. You see the nervous gulp of his throat, feel the warmth radiating from his body in that brief touch.

You complete your first set—five songs, running your total time performing just under a half hour—and begin making your rounds again, schmoozing with the attendees. Saving Francis for last.

“Wait for me by the elevators after I’m done. You know where they are?” Your lips are close to his ear. You can still smell his aftershave from what must have been early that morning. You hate rising before dawn. You much prefer the nights. Easier to hide. Take what you want. Feast.

“Yes,” he manages to croak out softly.

“Good. See you then, honey,” you purr into his ear, making him shiver.

***

The man sticks out like a sore thumb.

Francis is pacing restlessly back and forth in front of the elevator doors when you arrive later that evening after your last set, rubbing the back of his neck, looking uncomfortable until you approach and then he freezes, standing rigid. Maybe a little of his natural instincts were kicking in, prey sensing predator. You’re not going to harm him; at least not unless that’s what he wanted. Maybe shy boy liked it rough. You would soon find out.

Wordlessly you push the button for the elevator and step into the carriage, gesturing for him to join you when it seems as if he is truly welded in place, forever stuck to the hotel’s carpets. You reside on the third floor, at the rear of the building. The room is generously sized and nicely furnished. You step out of your high heels gratefully as soon as you’ve cleared the door, one of the nuances of fashion that you don’t appreciate quite as much. They were really quite uncomfortable to walk in.

The human male hovers just inside the doorway, his nervousness radiating from him. You’re starting to wonder how much experience he has with females in general. Maybe you should have waited for a night when he’d been a little more intoxicated, when his inhibitions had been a little lower. But you’d been impatient. Careful about all those other details when it came to consumption, but this type of hunger, this lust, is a demanding mistress you aren’t accustomed to dealing with.

“Have a seat. Get comfortable.” You switch on the living room lamp and gesture towards the plush white couch and he sits stiffly at one end, his cap clutched by the brim in his fidgeting fingers.

You pull the hat away gently and toss it onto the coffee table, then sink down at the opposite end, not wanting to intimidate him too much just yet. You can see the pulse jumping in his neck. Such a lovely throat. You’re willing to bet the blood inside would be sugar sweet.

“You got a girl?”

“Uh…no. I’m single. I live alone. I have a daughter. Her mother and I…we all live in the same apartment building.”

“Hmmm.” Your polished nails drum on the arm rest. “That delivery job of yours stresses you out, huh?”

“It’s just the hours. Longer days. A lot of people don’t want to leave the house anymore, now that…” His voice trails off.

“Now that the doppelgangers have invaded,” you finish for him.

“Right.”

“You ever see one?”

“No. I mean, not that I know of. Kind of seems like the last thing you’d ever see if you did. That’s another part of what makes the job difficult. You don’t really know what’s on the other side of the door. Have you ever…?”

Every day when I look in the mirror, you think. You merely shake your head for his benefit.

“You know how to give a massage? My feet are killing me.”

“I, uh…”

“It doesn’t take much skill. You’re just rubbing.” You lift the train of your dress and shift positions so your nylon clad feet rest on his lap, stretching out across the length of the couch. You see the slightly alarmed look on his features and your voice is soothing, patient. “It’s okay, Francis. You’ve got this.”

His hands reach tentatively for one foot, placing one over the top and the other underneath. His movement are stiff, brisk, awkward, until you begin to hum that Dean Martin song he’d seemed to enjoy, making his hands slacker, softer, caressing the sore areas. You interrupt the melody to groan appreciatively, stretching further, letting your heels grind against his thighs. It’s starting to feel good. He has nice hands. You want them on you in other places.

You slide one foot closer to his crotch, gently stroking. He’s gone immobile again, startled. You drag both feet back and stand, now moving in front of the seated man, lifting your dress so you can straddle his lap. His hands reflexively reach for your waist. You dig your hands into his thick russet hair, tugging his head back slightly.

“You ever have any of those lonely housewives ask you to come in? Make a special delivery?”

“N…no. It’s just business. No one notices…”

“You sure about that? Maybe you’re just too polite to notice when a woman is hungry.” Your free hand tugs on the bow tie, loosening it. You undo the first two buttons of his shirt. You want a taste of that gorgeous throat of his, even if it’s only the top layer and not the succulent fluids below that you’re after.

The pleasant scent of that aftershave assaults you again as soon as your face bends to sample the arch. His skin is slightly rough, the facial hair he’d scraped away reclaiming its territory at this late hour. You lick from the base all the way up to his jaw, and the fingers on your waist tighten.

“You think maybe you’ve got one more batch you need to deliver, honey?” Your hand dives straight for the fly of his pants, pleased to feel he’s already becoming aroused.

A choked sound escapes the man’s lips. Maybe an attempt at a word that becomes garbled with incoherent pleasure. Your impatience is growing. Too many layers. Earthlings insisted on wearing so many. Your species didn’t care about that, in your natural habitat. You could shred them to pieces so easily with your claws, but that would mean revealing what you truly are, and you don’t want to do that just yet. The man is anxious enough as it is.

So you settle for using the human hands you’ve replicated to unfasten the belt and zipper and undo the button, reaching beneath the waistband of his underwear and dragging his cock free. Ample. Leaking. You stroke over it and he hisses, a feral sound not unlike one a male of your species might make. Your teeth nip his earlobe, tease his bottom lip before you finally sink your tongue inside his mouth. There’s the faint, lingering taste of alcohol, but you ignore that and instead concentrate on the feeling of that wet maw, stroking cheeks and tongue and teeth and palate, exploring thoroughly. You don’t even have to guide him to the straps of your dress, feeling them slid over your shoulders, then moving to the front of your dress to knead the further exposed globes of flesh there.

“That’s good, doll. That’s really, really good.” His fingers are beneath the fabric, pinching and rolling your nipples, making them erect. You like it, but it’s not where you need him most. There’s a wet heat between your legs that’s throbbing. A hollow space waiting to be filled, and the prick in your hands is perfect for the job.

You gently push on his forearm and he takes over from there, snaking beneath the slit of your dress, the seam ripping a bit as it’s still partially tucked beneath you. He pauses. “Shit, sorry…”

“I have plenty of other dresses. I don’t care. Touch me, Francis.” The lingerie you’re wearing is skimpy. Nearly indecent. Clinging, and he tears more fabric in his urgency to work beneath the pair of panties. His digits find moisture and you moan into his mouth. That was what you needed. The pads of his fingers rolling across your clit. Parting your lips. Digging into your entrance. He’s becoming bolder now. The desire coded into DNA so long ago to ensure the propagation of the species continues taking over.

Your head tips back as you gently ride a pair of his fingers. You’re still stroking him, keeping him slick and hard. Back at his mouth again. You like kissing him. A lot. It makes your insides flutter. You’re getting even wetter.

Eventually you move away. You have to, if you’re ever going to get what you need. You lift your dress and bend over the armrest of the couch, your panties dragged down just past the lace edge of your thigh high stockings. The milkman’s dick finds your opening and slides in smooth, straight to the hilt, stretching and filling you. Your nails dig into the fabric of the couch. You’re so tempted to let the natural claws peak out, to allow the gentle incisors lining the front of your mouth shift to the genuine, sharper cuspids. It takes tremendous effort to keep the monster within restrained. The bloodlust mingles with the other, surprising you with its intensity. You’d fed so well. You shouldn’t be this hungry again so soon.

The man’s hands grip your hips, aiding him as he thrusts in and out. He’s still holding back, still gentler than what you’d like. “Fuck me harder, Francis. I want that cock in as deep as it can go.”

He grunts, maybe a little surprised with how aggressive your words are. Nice young women didn’t talk like this. Then again, you’re not a nice young woman. Not really. You just look like one, bent over with your ass cheeks spread, letting a virtual stranger violate you. You fucking love it.

His hips slap against you a little faster now, a little rougher. You push back to meet him, matching his rhythm, driving him in even further. So good. He’s hitting a tender spot inside just right. You’re getting close to achieving orgasm.

Francis is, too. You feel it in the tremors that make his hands shake on your body, the breath that stutters in rasping pants.

“Fill me up, honey. I want every drop of that milk.”

Spurred on by this last request, he moans and you feel the wet heat of his release painting your insides. You tip over the edge at that exact moment, the walls of your canal contracting and squeezing his cock, making sure to extract every bit of his seed.

If the man had looked tired before, he looked absolutely exhausted now. Spent. Drained. He flops wearily onto the couch after pulling out. You drag your panties back into place and let your hem fall down, sliding the straps of your gown back over your shoulders as you join him. You’re a little tired yourself, after that brief, intense session.

“What time do you have to get up in the morning?”

“Four.”

You clench your tongue with your teeth, sucking in a sympathetic draft of air. “It’s midnight now.”

“Yeah.”

“You want to stay? I’ll make sure to wake you up on time. Set the alarm.”

“No. It’s too far from work. I still have to load up the truck in the morning. I’m better off going home.”

“Alright.” You’re not particularly upset at him declining your offer. You are curious about something else, though. “Are you coming back to the hotel on Friday? That will be my last performance of the week.”

He looks over at you. “Yes, I will.”

“Maybe you could stay over that night. You don’t work on the weekend, do you?”

“No. Someone else has that shift.” He reaches out tentatively to touch your cheek, his thumb stroking your bottom lip. “I’ll stay that night, if you want.”

“Yes. I want.” You lean over to kiss him, the gesture gentle this time. Soothing, like the song you’d hummed earlier. “Go get some sleep, doll. You’re going to need the energy for Friday night.” For just the briefest, fleeting moment, the glamour shielding your true eyes from view slips, and the milkman’s own flare in alarm. But then you’re disguised again, so swiftly you know he’s questioning if he’d really seen what he thought he’d seen, or if it’s just fatigue that’s making his eyes play tricks on him.

You couldn’t possibly be a doppelganger.

#francis mosses x you #francis mosses x reader #francis mosses #milkman #thats not my neighbor #milkman x reader #milkman x you #the milkman #that’s not my neighbor #tnmn francis mosses #tnmn smut #divider @saradikagraphics

[plate2]

Honestly I'm thinking and this season of dimension 20 has so many plot lines that are all needing to be tied up fairly quickly. It makes me a little concerned for the finale in terms of how rushed it may feel or how little pc-pc or pc-npc interaction there may be. But I am wondering, right-

There's so much to do. They're in their junior year, and we're hopefully presuming there will be a senior year. Some of the combats so far (ex. Night Yorb, rage mall, grix) have happened with some kind of help throughout it (the curse, Connor counterspell, the vulture king) and they end up succeeding (at least partially because of it). In the finale, it's very very reasonable that they get through it and everything works out.

BUT what if it doesn't. What if it starts going well and then drops like those other combats have gone. What if there's no kind of help this time. What if something actually goes terribly dangerously wrong and they can't fix it. What if senior year has a continuation of the same very intruiging plot?

This is mainly just ramblings before the finale episodes (and I don't think this will likely happen) but I am thinking about it. I'm thinking very much about it

#this is just me denying the fact they're likely going to kill the ratgrinders #and I'm head in hands about the ratgrinders if no one can tell (I love them and think about them way too often) #dimension 20 #d20 fantasy high #fhjy spoilers #the bad kids #the ratgrinders #like I said I don't think this is likely but apocalyptic senior year or something similar is sitting in the back of my mind #(it's just me hoping for more ratgrinders content) #this is so rambly I'm so sorry #plate2posts #also don't get me wrong I absolutly love this season so so much and no matter how the finale goes I will still love it

[vierss-herondale]

Please tell me your favourite thing(s) about Clace! I'm rereading TMI and I just am falling in love with them all over again. I'm at CoFA, they're FINALLY officially together, and their banter is ON POINT (they come by it honestly. Wessa, yk yk.) But YEAH . And also ramble about Sizzy too if you're into it, they're hitting SO hard this time and I'm in love in love in love with them.

Bestie, I don’t even know where to start 😂

The fact that during TMI most of the people saw Clary as this tiny little girl and they underestimated her but Jace realized very quickly how STRONG she really was! Like, he kicks her ass for real during training! He knows she can take it! And she’s the bravest person he knows!

And how everyone sees Jace as this strong warrior but Clary knows the fragility that lays underneath his tough exterior. Most of the people describes Jace as "hot/sexy" but Clary almost always thinks about him as ✨beautiful✨

Don’t even get me started on how Jace lacked love for so long in his life, even thinking that his heart was broken and he was incapable of falling in love… and then he met Clary, someone with such a big heart and with SO MUCH LOVE to give, and then they fell in love! ♥️

It makes me so sad that during TMI Jace had such a low faith in himself because of the way Valentine raised him. That he thought he had to be perfect or the Lightwoods would kick him out. Can you imagine that? Living with such fear of losing the love of the only family you ever know? 🥺🥺 That's why I love the fact that Clary's faith in Jace is so big and it NEVER lacks! And she makes sure he KNOWS it. That he can always count on her and her love for him.

And the fact that even when Jace was taught that love destroys you, he was never afraid of loving Clary! He said that loving her was the best feeling he ever felt. In many other books you see the male protagonist keep the girl away because they are afraid to fall in love but Jace never did that, quite the contrary actually.

I love how they complete each other, and how they helped each other to be better! Jace learned so much from Clary, and became a better version of himself, but Clary also growth so much after meeting him!

I also love how they pick on each other so much! They know how to have fun!

Listen, I know it's SUCH a big cliche and judge me all you want but I LOOOVE how Jace was mean to everyone but Clary lol In my defense I was a teenager when Wattpad was a hit and the bad boy trope was on every story 😂 So yeah, I like that he’s such a sweetheart with her and ONLY her 🫶🏻

How Jace looks at Clary as if she's his personal miracle 🥹♥️

I love that she NEVER slut shamed Jace! I have seen that some part of the fandom judge Jace for sleeping with other girls BEFORE HE MET CLARY. Like bro? It's his body and he was single, I don't see the problem and I love that Clary never judged him for that. She always knew that what they have is different from anything Jace could have had with other girls. I love a secure female character 🫶🏻

Also girl the way he's SO OBSESSED with her! He worships her so hard! I love those kind of male protagonist!!!

There's LOTS of things I love about Clace but I might never finish listing them so let's just cut it here lol

Now about Sizzy... I love that couple because they always seem like such a REAL LIFE couple to me.

Look I'm such a sucker for love at first sight couples like Clace BUT the reason why I love Simon and Izzy is because they are so real about the way their relationship developed.

In real life most people falls in love more than once in life and that's normal and it's okay. You can go through heart break and be hurt but that doesn't mean that you can't fall in love again and it be even MORE stronger than before! Simon represents that so well. He loved Clary so much for many years but then he realized they didn't work like that, and his love transformed into friendship love.

And then he fell in love with Izzy and it was a stronger feeling! This time he knew he belonged with her. That's just like real life is, you can fall in love more than once but it doesn’t mean that your previous love was less valid.

And Izzy is such an amazing character, she was the one that taught teenage me that you can wear makeup, dresses and high hills AND STILL KICK ASSES while doing so!

I think she's such a brave character because she carried the pain of her father's betrayal on her mom for so long... But she overcame it and she was brave enough to open up her heart to Simon. This comes from someone who went through something similar at a similar age and believe me, I KNOW by first hand how brave and strong Izzy had to be to let herself trust someone else with her heart. She’s so special to me.

And she opened her heart to Simon TWICE! They are a couple that went through a LOT and it makes me so happy to know that they are engaged now ♥️

#ask #clace #clary fairchild #jace herondale #clary fray #jace wayland #jace lightwood #Jace lightwood herondale #sizzy #izzy lightwood #isabelle lightwood #simon lewis #simon lovelace #tmi #the mortal instruments #tsc #the shadowhunter chronicles #cds #vierssherondale

[prythiansfavoritefox]

Lucien held the pot carefully, afraid that he might smash it. An irrational fear, but one borne of centuries of disappointments combined with his own failures. It was a lovely pot, glazed in the same pink as the eyes of his lost lover. Orange flames had been painted in a lattice pattern across the pot too. Overall, it was quite lovely artwork.

But Lucien had hated it on sight. His feelings  of hatred had lessened now, but…that pot represented cruelty. It represented a bitter bitter end. Although the pot was not large or filled with bone-crushing weights, it felt awfully heavy in Lucien’s arms.

His eldest brother had given it to him. His first gift in a good century or so. He and Eris had once been thick as thieves; Eris was far more a father to him than Beron had ever been, and his true father had not even been aware of his existence. But Beron had driven them apart. Lucien had seen far too much of Beron in him. He hadn’t truly seen Eris. He hadn’t understood.

He had lost faith in the people close to him so many times that Lucien had not dared to believe better of his brother. That hadn’t ended well for him in the past. 

The pot trembled in Lucien’s hands.

An indigo-gloved hand came to cover his own, steadying the shakiness. Lucien instantly eased up at her comforting touch even through the fabric. 

“Thank you,” Lucien whispered. Elain just squeezed his hand before letting her own slide away so that she could loop her arm through his. “I am here for you always,” she answered. Lucien didn’t have words to express the gratitude within him. Her presence beside him made him feel stronger, and finally, he walked out of the doors of the Forest House.

Thought he abhorred the place, it seemed only fitting to start the journey where it had all ended. And now, it would end in a much better place.

They could just winnow to their intended location, but the journey was important. To remember her. To honor her.

“What is your favorite memory of her?” Elain asked as they strode barefoot through the tall grasses of Autumn. Lucien blinked. “I am not sure you wish to hear of me with somebody else,” he muttered. His mate only smiled, her golden brown hair shimmering in the sun. “I am not threatened by your past, Lucien. I only wish to hear of more times you were happy. Your life is marred by so much trauma…I wish to treasure your joy.”

It was times like these that reminded Lucien that he was not the only charmer in this relationship. Elain Archeron: his mate, his wife, his equal. A seer who also possessed doe-brown eyes that could stare into your soul. 

He thought a moment. What was his favorite memory with the pixie? “When we were dancing at a ball once,” Lucien recalled, “That troublemaker dragged me out of the ball and into a celebration with her community amongst the farmers. She taught me traditional folk dances, brought me to their open market, and took me to one of their live comedy performances on the streets. I picked up some bansuri while helping herd cows too. I can still play; do you want to listen?”

Elain’s lips quirked and her brown eyes sparkled. “Perhaps when we get home, adventurer.” Home. Lucien hadn’t had a real one in a while. He tamped down on the tears knowing that once he started, he would take forever to stop. “As the lady wishes.”

Elain snorted delicately but said nothing. The conversation had been a nice way to pass the time; Lucien hadn’t even noticed that they were already halfway to their destination. 

“I can’t believe Eris actually saved it,” Lucien added after a beat of silence. “I thought…it was lost forever. I have had to live with it for centuries. Not just her death, but…the fact that she wouldn’t be able to rest in peace.” 

“I know,” Elain said quietly. “But nothing that happened was your fault.” Lucien nodded, throat too tight to speak. He knew that now. He’d always known it, but his own self-loathing had prevented him from seeing it. But he had learned to love himself again. Elain was a huge reason for that.

It was so difficult to believe that he was actually here, back in his home, and it was a safe place to be. He savored the crisp Autumn air, the strength that flooded into his veins by being in this court. 

At last they reached their destination: the Phlegethon river. “Don’t touch the water,” Lucien warned his mate as they both knelt before it. “It may look lovely, but it’s not ordinary water. The water is so hot that it feels cold to the touch. At least for those without fireborn immunity.”

Elain blinked. “So…only Autumn Court faeries can touch it?”

“Only Autumn Court gifted High Fae,” Lucien amended. Slowly, he lifted the top of the urn.

His hands shook slightly again. “I am here,” Elain murmured, placing her hand on his shoulder. Lucien closed his eyes, savoring that touch, his one tether to this land. Then he opened his eyes and turned the pot over. Ashes began to pour into the river. Lucien watched as the ashes blended with the water and began to flow downstream.

“Goodbye Jesminda,” Lucien whispered. “May your spirit and soul finally be at peace in the afterlife.”

Lucien could’ve sworn he felt a gentle hand tousle his crimson waves, as Jesminda used to do long ago. Perhaps it was her spirit. Perhaps it was the Mother herself. It felt as though a thousand pounds of steel had just been removed from his chest. At last he could breathe again, live again. He turned to the love of his life, whose arms were already open, waiting for him.

Lucien pulled Elain into his arms and squeezed her tightly, one hand going into her hair, the other firmly on her back. She had come here for him. Had helped him mourn Jesminda. She was his strength, his beacon, his light.

“I love you more than anything,” Lucien whispered against her ear. He felt her smile against him before she pulled away. Elain stood up, green vines twirling around her palms. Lucien watched, transfixed, as she waved her hands and began to form a tree. The trunk was tall and narrow, but what was truly impressive was the branches, covered head-to-toe with seemingly hundreds of drooping lavender flowers. “A wisteria,” Elain  answered his unspoken question. “To mark the spot where Jesminda attained salvation.”

Tears began to well in Lucien’s eyes. Everything- all the pain and suffering had been worth it to find her. He would endure it all again should she be waiting at the end of it all. He was a man of many words, yet there were none pretty enough to describe the depth of his feelings for her, for what she’d just done. “You are my everything,” Lucien said simply. “You are the reason why I wake up every morning, who I dream of when I go sleep. It is you who gave me the courage to walk here today, and you…I cannot imagine anyone more perfect.”

Elain beamed, tears forming in her eyes too. “And I cannot imagine anyone more perfect than you. I am simply returning the kindness you showed me in mourning my father by my side. You need not thank me for this. I would do anything for you.”

Lucien stood up and walked over to her. He picked her up by the waist and spun her out. She squealed delightfully, and Lucien finally placed her down, getting on his knees before her. “I will thank you for this, as I will thank you for every little thing you do, because you deserve the appreciation for all the important work you’ve been doing behind the scenes that never got appreciated. You will never be ignored, or shunted to the side, or underestimated, or coddled. I vow to love you and support you in all of your endeavors forevermore.”

Elain covered her face with her hands and began to sob, and Lucien gently pried her hands off of her face, a small smirk on his face. “I thought I’d be the one crying today, but look at you, bawling your eyes out.” Elain gasped and swatted at him. “You rascal!” Lucien grinned before standing up and giving a mocking bow. “I know not what you speak of, m’lady. I am a perfect gentleman.”

Elain rolled her eyes, and Lucien only laughed and pulled her into an embrace in response. After a long moment, they turned around and began to walk back.

Jesminda would never be forgotten. Her memories would live in the hearts of all those who knew her, including Lucien. He would choose to recall the best of her, the joy and good times they had together, a part of his past that he loved. In doing so, Lucien finally allowed himself to be happy again, to live laugh and love again, to start a new chapter of his life with his mate, Elain Archeron.

#elucien #lucien vanserra #elain archeron #jesminda #fanfic

[inthedarknessofnight]

well, well, well… here we go again… didn’t think I’d manage to get through more than one fic last week because I was busy dying of the plague (aka covid), but I basically did nothing but read fics the whole weekend so here we are

KAYA’S STEDDIE-FIC WEEK PART 3 ✨

1. Skull Rock Era by @chattre-kisses

sue me but I’m actually a sucker for fics that have Eddie and Steve meet before the shitshow that is S4… this fic mingles the Steddie plot with the actual plot of the show so masterfully and so beautifully and I think every time that I get to experience Steve’s reaction to Eddie nearly dying in the Upside Down is a blessing from the ao3 gods… so many beautiful Steddie moments in this one and when I tell you, WHEN I FINALLY REALIZED WHAT THE TITLE OF THE FIC IS REFERRING TO… besties I started bawling

2. The Edification of Steve Harrington by ChronicRabbit

realized while reading this one that I’ve read a bunch of ‘Eddie takes care of Steve’ fics, but virtually no fics where it’s the other way around… after this one, you can rest assured I will be reading every single one out there because WHAT IN THE ACTUAL FUCK 😭 also, anyone else out there weak for protective Steve? like, I want that mf to obliterate anyone who so much as looks at Eddie the wrong way… also Steve forgetting he’s got a date with a girl because he’s too distracted by Eddie might be my new favourite Steddie trope phaha… anyways, loved this

3. To Be Loved For No Reason At All by @beetlesandstarss

another ‘Steve takes care of Eddie’ fic… idk but there’s something so hauntingly sentimental about reading fics that were being written as S4 was still coming out… we were different humans back then fr… anyways, this fic… WOW… the song recs at the beginning of every chapter, *chef’s kiss* (tbh I’m sold anytime I see Sex by The 1975 phaha, easily convinced and all that)… also, I love me a slightly angsty Eddie, can you blame me… also, HE BROUGHT HIM FLOWERS, NO ONE SPEAK TO ME FOR A WEEK AHSGSFXAHSG… the smut in this is so gorgeously intimately written, the characterization is on point… and don’t even get me started on “CAN I KISS YOU?” “WILL YOU STILL WANT ME IN THE MORNING?”… yeah, I need to go touch some grass 🥲

all in all, another great week of Steddie fics, may have cried more during this one than any of the previous ones but like I’m on my period so don’t take me too seriously lol

#steddie #fanfic #fanfiction #stranger things #eddiemunson #steveharrington #ao3 #ao3 writer #writing #steddie fic rec #fic rec #fic recommendation #weekly fic recs #fic roundup #steddie fanfiction #ao3 fanfic #fanfic rec

[britt-kageryuu]

The audience of the stream is watching Leo move about the set checking a laptop, tablet, and his phone all sitting on a desk with a blue gaming chair. He was also swapping his models outfit, not sure which would fit with whatever he was about to talk about.

He finally chose a full Lou Jitsu jumpsuit, with gloves, platform shoes, and shield glasses worn over his usual mask. He plopped back into the chair and poses with his one of his ligs crossed over the other, and leaning onto his left hand.

"Sorry 'bout starting the stream while I wasn't ready. I found some amazing news, and wanted to track down as much actual facts, to make sure I had everything correct." He leans over to the laptop to set something up. Once he was satisfied he turns back to facing the camera.

"So, it's fairly obvious we're big Lou Jitsu fans here, so imagine our surprise to hear about someone attempting to claim his supposed left behind fortune. Because people for some reason think he's dead, and not just trying to live peacefully somewhere." Leo clicks on something, and a news article pops up.

"Woman claims to be Lou Jitsus 'long lost' Daughter/Granddaughter."

"Either the Lady couldn't keep her story straight, or whoever wrote this kept getting conflicting evidence. Part of why I wasn't quite ready. Had to check is with my journalist sis to see if she could help get things straight." He clicks over to something else and a different article takes the place of the previous one.

"Woman attempts to steal fortune of Lou Jitsu with faulty Scam. Surprised by the results!"

"So to set the scene better, this lady shows up out of nowhere, claiming she's, let's see by age... Daughter! Of Lou Jitsu. I don't know how she planned to have this work with modern DNA matching and everything, but she apparently refused to do a DNA test to prove this. If this was literally 30 years earlier she wouldn't have to worry, but I guess she didn't bank on people asking so many questions." He gets rid of the article, and brings up a badly edited birth certificate. "Seems she believed she could just wave around a doctored Birth Certificate, and some flimsy 'photographic evidence' that looked like they were put together in a bootleg photoshop program."

A couple of pictures appear on screen, they were obviously edited pictures of Lou Jitsu "holding" a baby, or child. Then a couple with a little girl that looked very off, the lighting didn't match between the girl, and Lou.

"Yeah, this didn't fly with the people at the banks, or whichever government offices, she had attempted go to, especially since there was a different thing blocking her from succeeding in this sham of a scam." Leo looks proud of himself for that slight word play. Something is thrown at him from off screen, and he glares at whoever threw it before continuing.

"You see, Lou Jitsu had set up an interesting set of security questions and or tests for getting access his bank accounts. He did include a DNA matching test as a last ditch security, but it never got that far. No she got caught at a slightly obscure set of security questions that required you to answer a random on set inside joke from one of Lou Jitsus first movies!" Leo laughs and spins in his chair a couple times. He stops and brings up a new document.

"Okay, so this is a copy of the security tests list we got ahold of, as you can see," He points at a spot near the top that's highlighted, "Lady didn't get very far into the security tests. Yeah there are alot of them, he apparently set this up not long before completely disappearing from the limelight. Though why there's so many tests is anyone's guess! Maybe it's just to annoy whoever attempts to fake their way into his accounts?"

Leo thinks it over a bit before muting the mic and shouting off to the side, then waiting for an answer, where he nods his head, and talks to whoever's off screen, with a couple of odd gestures and head tilts. After a couple minutes he unmutes the mic.

"So, just asked Dee a couple questions, and while we can only speculate why Lou make such a complicated set of tests, what we do know is that the tests were actually updated a few years back. So Lou is still out there, and he knows the Lady made this attempt. And has filed a lawsuit against her! That will be an interesting day in court!!" He quickly stands up and throws his arms up in the air with jazz hands.

After sitting back down he swaps out the documents still on screen with a couple of pictures of the Lady's headshots from getting arrested for attempted fraud, and scam. Her name is blurred out.

"This is the Lady, we don't want to give out her name since she either has a very unfortunate name, or she would only give them a very crude name instead of her actual name. Plus some places can't legally tell the names of people who were arrested, so let's go with that." Leo reads some notes on the laptop then added, "And she might have a record already, but we can't read or find any legal documents that confirm or deny this."

The pictures are taken off the screen, and the lighting changes.

"Well, there's not much more of that incident that's public, so let's move on to something else Lou Jitsu related! They've announced a new special anniversary movie bundle! And we have some info on the special bonus features!" Leo announces, and brings up some graphics for this movie bundle.

The stream continues from there, and even though some people in chat are still shouting questions about the scammer lady segment, they get ignored and buried under other things spammed in the chat. Especially since donation notifications were disabled for the stream.

-------------------

Masterpost

#VTurtles! #vtuber au #rottmnt au #tmnt au #rottmnt leonardo #rottmnt leo #rise leonardo #rise leo #lou jitsu #rottmnt fanfiction #tmnt fanfiction #rottmnt #tmnt #teenage mutant ninja turtles #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #tmnt 2018 #rise tmnt #rise of the tmnt #rottmnt lou jitsu

[mindstriker]

pspspsps I have not played BG3 but I’d listen to you get on the soapbox about Astarion and Gale and Lae’zel. :] I love the vampire…twink(?) and hearing good things about that Gale guy and the frog(?) lady who makes my gender kinda start buzzing like a cicada <3

THE PEOPLE HAVE SPOKEN, AND HOW NOW SO SHALL I.

Seriously though, thanks for giving me an excuse to yap. As much as I am an enjoyer of fandom shipping, I am also a friendmaxxing visitorpilled individual and while I'm a strong proponent of pretty much every Baldur's Gate 3 Origin character being friends to some degree, I have my favourites, and Lae'zel, Gale, and Astarion are a trio I find particularly compelling. Maybe just because my first playthrough I exclusively travelled with them and loved their shared dialogue. So! THE DYNAMIC (as I see it.)

This is gonna be a long post. Oops.

Gale + Astarion

The one that I like equally as a romantic and platonic venture. I'm gonna be real, I tend to like these two as an actual romantic pairing- but that's irrelevant here. I've been over the lighter reasons why I think they'd be the ultimate pompous wine aunts of the group before, but there's a bit more to it than that.

Asides from shared aesthetic and literary interests, when I say I think they like each other in a surprisingly uncomplicated way despite their personal complexities, I truly do mean it that way. I feel that Gale is the type of person Astarion could truly come to cherish as a friend, once he's in a better place personally. He's startlingly authentic, giving Astarion a space to be as well, should he wish, rather than keep up his entirely charming facade- kind to others while also being... morally flexible enough to pique Astarion's interest and to avoid making him feel like he's being monitored by someone TOO well-intentioned (because I love Astarion, but he IS a bit of a bastard and will be forever, I reckon). On Gale's front, I genuinely think a part of him would feel incredibly vindicated by having a friend in Astarion- someone who would unabashedly encourage his ambitions and wilder interests (but whom I believe would still have his best interests vaguely at heart). Obviously that can take a darker turn under some scenarios- but I like to think that Astarion's playfulness and willingness to embrace his curiosity and passion about the stranger and more... reckless side of his work could be freeing to him. Like having that one friend that finally listens to you when you say "hear me out" and only intervenes if it's a TRULY bad take. Someone he can actually be mischevious with- because Gale IS a bit of a little shit himself, when he's given the freedom to be without guilt.

Gale + Lae'zel

This is the unusual friendship that I go the hardest about. I am so normal about them and what they could mean to each other. Lae'zel is incredibly dismissive of Gale initially, as she is with most of the others- but she's incredibly soft towards him by gith standards starting from the moment he demonstrates genuine respect and curiosity towards her and her people. Assessing his physical combat skills as less-than-deal shortly after meeting him, she even goes so far as to offer to *literally* train him in gith combat tactics shortly into your journey. That is not an offer I think Lae'zel makes lightly, or out of pragmatism alone. Is it because she sees him as weak? Yes. But it's also because she sees him as capable enough to become stronger, and worth training so that he is no LONGER weak. Most githyanki would not do that for another, especially one they had not met. Lae'zel is incredibly kind and giving to the others from the get-go no matter what anyone says about her "attitude"- putting her life and the code of ethics she lives by on the ropes to help a bunch of outsiders from the very start- but she is especially so to him, someone which many of her people may have outright discarded as useless.

From there, she starts to answer some of his questions. I like to think he talks to her about Faerun in turn for every question he asks- recognizing that the earth is as alien to her as she is to it. That's a good start for any friendship, really- mutual curiosity.

And then it gets stronger, as their personal struggles are revealed. The moment Lae'zel begins to waver in her faith and her dedication to Vlaakith is right around the same moment she hotly declares Mystra a fool for "demanding that Gale place all her faith in her and giving him none in return". She defends him against a literal god, declaring him capable and part of a mighty group- a stunning turn from her initial assessment. She balks at the idea of sacrificing him when she believes so firmly that it's an unnecessary waste of a skilled man. Possibly one she now considers a friend.

They are, in many ways, similar. Groomed in different senses by gods/god-like powers that only sought to milk them for all they were worth and then discard them when convenient. Manipulators of a celestial variety- the type of people who leave you with the realization that your entire life has been wasted serving them. Both of them were even wanted for their power- Laezel for her unwavering loyalty and militant prowess, Gale for his magical ability.

So, TLDR: They have, from the beginning, connected to each other via mutual understanding. They go through shocking life changes together and find solace in finding understanding in someone whose struggle initially seemed so alien to the other. From there, I feel like they'd genuinely find more casual things to bond over as Lae'zel discovers her enjoyment of Faerun and its wonders. No one would go ham over having a friend newly excited to learn about the world than Gale "could talk at length about anything" Dekarios.

Astarion + Lae'zel

This doesn't seem right at first, right? Poncey (lovingly) vampire meets unwaveringly stoic alien warrior. Except there's something ruthless and downright STURDY about Astarion that I can see Lae'zel quietly appreciating from the beginning. She can tell that he's willing to go the distance- even if they butt heads over her revulsion concerning the tadpoles and Astarion's attempts to wheedle the group into using them for their own gain. I feel like respect is shockingly easily earned for him on her front. In turn, I feel like Astarion is quite wary of her first- but honestly? He might be vaguely assuaded by the fact that Gale, arguably the most vulnerable of them all, just seemingly wanders around chatting with her intermittently without losing any limbs or being verbally abused. He also definitely clocks right off the bat in that scheming way of his that she'd be an incredibly helpful ally to have.

Except she's not easily seduced, or swayed by charm and friendly platitudes. Instead, I think the thing Lae'zel would silently begin to appreciate about him first is the subtle ways he shows interest in the world around him- his dialogue about not remembering how much colour there was in the world, and the like. As someone who's learning to love her new surroundings bit by bit, I can see her sympathizing with his newfound adoration of the daylight and outdoors he was deprived of for so long.

Later, she wholeheartedly supports Astarion's campaign to be rid of Cazador, and he even gleefully states "good for her" when she decides to turn her back on Vlaakith- so I reckon they're another check on the front of "friends bonding over overthrowing those who have been unrighteously in charge of them for so long". The circumstances are highly different, but the sentiment is shared: fuck that guy, I won't be their puppet anymore.

Finally, in the ending where Lae'zel chooses to stay on Faerun and forge her own fate exploring a new world, I can see her and Astarion working together- both enjoying their newfound freedom from cause and control and absorbing all the joys of a *functionally* new world for the both of them. With the aid of their far more local wizard friend who's less prone to the battlefield, of course. I can see them teaming up for a glorious adventure or two easily. Battle buddies, and the like.

#this is me yelling #gale dekarios #baldurs gate 3 #bg3 #lae'zel #lae'zel bg3 #astarion ancunun #astarion bg3 #gale bg3 #long ass statement huh. i have a lot more i could say about any of them but this was already extensive as is... man...

[leonenjoyer69]

Do you got some angsty headcanons for Elias? Elias and anyone else?

Apologies that this took actual weeks to get to, but we're so fucking back (this is also an answer for @dustmint who asked the same >:3)

Okay, starting off, (I think I may have mentioned it before but who knows,) Elias is lowkey a workaholic, for many different reasons tho!!

First of all, out the gate he has that work ethic that Lanyon Sr. tried to encourage Robert to have. Elias has to keep himself busy somehow, so why not get things done? Like previously stated, he has more of an affinity for all the doctory stuff Lanyon learned, so he tends to play doctor for the society. Otherwise, he also helps Jekyll with paperwork, no matter how boring, because the light thanks he gets at the end makes it worth it.

Secondly, and back onto the keeping busy part, Elias is restless af. Being more emotional and such, he's very prone to over thinking and spiraling over things- thinking he's not enough, or that people hate him, etc.- and gets overwhelmed by his thoughts quite easily (think like Hyde in Shatter me!, when he's getting chased and such, his thoughts becoming more base and fearful.), he's generally able to hide it though. When he's around Jekyll/Hyde these thoughts tend to go away, and when he's actively working or being praised/complimented for his work, they also tend to calm. So, when Jekyll/Hyde are unavailable and Lanyon let's him take over (usually after much nagging, bribery, or pleading) he buries himself in work. Whether that be medical research, paperwork, cleaning, or anything else he can do to keep occupied, he doesn't really care.

Because of this excessive emotional instability and restlessness, Lanyon tends to snap at him a LOT when they're alone together, Especially because Elias avoids going into the subconscious as much as possible. Being outside with only the presence of his other half? Overwhelming and usually not great, but being completely alone and numb in the subconscious? 100x worse to him. After the first time Lanyon finally bullied Elias into the subconscious, he came back a couple hours later near hysterical. after that debacle, Lanyon just decided that Elias bugging him and floating around with minimal breakdowns and complaining was better than having to deal with that again.

Also, Elias is absolutely obsessed with Jekyll and Hyde. Practically codependent, he's like a puppy. He yearns to be around either of them at basically all times, and when he isn't he, of course, becomes super restless and lowkey depressed. Also, the thoughts that tend to mess him up the most are ones related to them, like Jekyll or Hyde actually hating him, or thoughts of something horrible happening to them, like getting caught or hurt, or even killed.

There are times though where he's able to sit and think without absolutely spiraling though. Usually when he feels this sort of emotional content, he'll go to a park and climb up and sit in the trees (usually at night, to watch the sky). These tend to be the nights where Lanyon and Elias have more of their heart to hearts, since Elias is more mellow and less likely to get emotional. Also, any trinkets or gifts from Jekyll/Hyde tend to soothe him a decent bit, as well as wearing or cuddling up with any stolen clothes.

Those heart to hearts don't tend to help with their constant disdain for each other though. Elias wants to constantly be in control and occupied and around Jekyll/Hyde. Lanyon, of course, also wants to be in control, because he does NOT like having that control stripped from him, especially when he's forced to watch his other half live the life that HE wants. They tend to fight for control a lot, and quite quickly have accidentally done half transformations multiple times ( I actually have a fic idea for this teehee :3). Otherwise, like previously stated, Lanyon is VERY jealous of Elias, for many reasons-- His work ethic and the praise he gets, how forward he is with Jekyll, how much more people seem to enjoy his company than Lanyon's, things like that.

Quick thing for Jekyll and Hyde too! Jekyll tends to get a bit self conscious when Elias gets touchy, mainly because he's half convinced that no part of Lanyon really loves him and that he's just gonna get used and heart broken again, despite how utterly romantic Elias acts (which Jekyll still tends to absolutely eat up). Hyde doesn't have such qualms, he absolutely thrives on all the physical contact and kissing and such. The romanticism tends to throw him off though, makes him super flustered and kinda makes him shut down a bit.

Okay! That's all I've really got for now. Once again, sorry this took so long 💀 if there's anything more specific or questions about how he would react to specific situations perhaps, feel free to send an ask, my inbox is always open, even if it takes a minute for me to get to it 💀

#answered asks #oc: elias wright #tgs #jekyll and hyde #lanyon takes the potion au #robert lanyon #my ramblings

[nevesmose]

I don't know anywhere near enough about Sanguinius to metaphorically crochet him into a little finger puppet for my primarch fics but how about a little baseless speculation about him and Fulgrim? Please note that this is all based on how I view them in the universe of my silly little stories and is in no way a claim about knowing how they are in canon / lore.

I would probably a) portray Sanguinius as a genuinely sweet adorable cinnamon roll too precious for this world and b) have Fulgrim utterly loathe him because of this.

I tend to write Fulgrim as being a pleasant and charming person who, deep down, is about 50% a deeply broken overthinking ultra-perfectionist and 50% really jealous and vindictive. Please understand that this isn't me saying he's just evil and always was because it really really isn't. It's entirely possible for someone with these traits to function perfectly well in society and not be a bad person in any meaningful sense.

However.

One of his formative experiences as a primarch was almost losing his entire legion due to the Blight corrupted geneseed that almost wiped them out right at the start.

He had to build them up himself from nothing with the constant threat of annihilation both in the sense that "if I fuck up a war and lose however-many thousand Astartes in a terrible accident on the double-ended dildo planet I have no reserves or replacements" and also "every use of our geneseed is a gamble against the horrific mutation coming back and destroying us all over again". In that context the solution he turns to, and the only one that probably makes sense based on his prior experience on Chemos, is perfection.

Make no mistakes, ever, anywhere, because the cost of failure is incalculable, even if it means committing science-treason so you can purge all weakness from your own space dudes. It's not a desire for perfection based on arrogance, although he is of course immensely arrogant in a lot of ways, but one motivated deep down by fear.

People like to clown on Fulgrim based on Jaghatai's infamous "I hear you do strange things to your warriors 😂👌" sick burn, but to be honest, viewed from his context, what Fulgrim's doing is somewhat understandable.

That is if we assume that the Khan isn't just making a cheap insult but rather is implying he knows a lot more than would be preferable about Fabius dicking around with Astartes genetics in order to detect and eliminate carriers of the corrupted gene-seed so that the III Legion, one of the smallest of all numerically, can still survive. And then a lot of other things too because, like Fabius could believably say in one of the weirder McNeill stories, forbidden science is akin to the ancient Terran delicacy known as Pringles. Once you pop you can't stop.

With that in mind it feels like a lot of Fulgrim's post-heresy actions, not just the snake orgies but the general distance and lack of care for his sons, comes from revelling in just finally being free of that level of stress and pressure weighing down on him at all times. Even Perturabo doesn't withdraw from the Iron Warriors that much and he's a dick.

Anyway, back to pre-heresy days. He has all this going on and then in comes Sanguinius with his giant fucking angel wings who everyone loves and who turned his legion into One Direction (not really but you know... perceptions vs reality and no one in this setting actually communicates with one another since they'd probably have a lot in common regarding fears of being mutants etc)

It's the kind of thing that I think would feel like a dagger in the heart to someone like Fulgrim. Directly highlighting and literally embodying all of his fears about mutation and imperfection and yet somehow appearing to get away with it while he has to exercise constant control and do horrible things simply in order for his legion to exist.

So for that reason I think he would absolutely hate Sangy and do everything he could to undermine him.

"Oh no, brother! I've accidentally spilled this entire Big Gulp cup of bright red Tizcan wine all over your beautiful white wings, and only moments before you were due to make a speech to ten million people about how wonderful the Imperium is! Let me help you clean it up."

And then he pulls out a Looney Tunes sized bottle labelled Fabius's Finest Molt-O-Matic Guaranteed Feather Remover and starts spraying it on him.

#he had the Big Gulp cup brought all the way from an ancient Terran dig site just so he could spill as much liquid as possible at one time #fulgrimposting #fulgrim #neves rambles #wh40k #warhammer 40k #warhammer 40000 #horus heresy

[journey-to-the-attic]

3rd anni req 16: lucifer, dad, aunt / home visit

ao3 link

note: finally got back to these! very quickly: lisa (aunt) has met satan and belphie but no one else, and zhao (dad) knows all the brothers already and specifically knows lucifer better at this point - the background things are stuff i intend to write in future. also i wasn't completely sure if the request wanted zhaolu, so i left it ambiguous (this would be pre- any relationship anyway, so take it as you like!)

∎ ∎ ∎ ∎ ∎

“I’m back! Where’s— huh, Lucifer?”

Lucifer lowers his glasses and polishes away the fog. “Welcome home.”

“...hi?” I dump my bag by the door and change into my slippers, then return to the kitchen door. He’s still there. “What’s the occasion?”

After all, last I checked, Lucifer had some pretty strict rules about hopping between worlds - special occasion birthday visits not counted, of course. At this, though, he just smiles mysteriously.

“Nothing in particular.” He takes a sip of his tea, then quirks an eyebrow at me. “Well? Tell me about your day.”

…sure, I decide, because as much as I’m suspicious about his reasons for being here, I’m still happy to see him. I pull up the chair opposite him.

Lucifer hasn’t been up here that many times, especially compared to Mammon or Satan (the latter who visits whenever he’s allowed, and the former who visits even when he isn’t) - but he looks completely at home in our kitchen. Oddly pleased with himself as well, though I have no idea what about.

A little smile stays on his face through one, two, three stories - he asks me to show him the pictures from a school trip to the maritime museum, and to send him the one of me sitting in a model submarine so that he can show the others. In return, he has a video of Mammon trying to teach a roc to swear.

“You can do it,” encourages the blurry Mammon on the screen, holding a little biscuit just out of reach. “C’mon, smart guy!”

The roc tucks its beak into his wing sulkily and doesn’t make a sound. Mammon tries fruitlessly for another little while, then ultimately throws up his hands and walks off.

Whoever’s behind the camera doesn’t move - they point it at the roc and wait silently. Sure enough, after barely a minute, it mumbles, “Son of a bitch.”

“He still hasn’t figured out its trick,” Lucifer says as I laugh. “It learns, but it doesn’t want him to know he taught it.”

“Does it have a name?”

“Would you like to give it one?”

“Ohh, can I?” I lean forward and peer closer at the roc in the video for a moment. “Mmm… Connie. Looks like a Connie.”

“Connie it is,” He says, smile widening.

At that moment, Dad totters unsteadily into the kitchen, lugging a cardboard box. Lucifer rises from his seat, then pauses.

“Careful— careful, mind! You’ll do your back in!”

“I have it,” Dad says through gritted teeth, and finally sets it down with a rather worrying crash. “There. Thank you.”

“You haven’t let me do anything,” Aunt Lisa says, disgruntled. A split second later, as if sensing him somehow, she turns and looks Lucifer directly in the face.

He freezes on the spot. Aunt Lisa scans him, and I can see her mentally taking notes on everything she sees - red eyes (weird, but could be contacts), extremely tall (unusual, but not impossible), and distinctly too well-dressed for having tea in someone’s kitchen.

“Hello,” She says smoothly, and if I didn’t know better I’d think she was completely unperturbed.

Lucifer clears his throat. “Hello.”

Neither of them make any move to introduce themselves. I catch Dad’s eye. He’s wearing the face of someone who completely forgot he had a guest over.

“Um,” He says. “This is Lucifer.”

Aunt Lisa barely blinks. “I see. Hello, Lucifer. Should I call you Mister?”

“No, that won’t be necessary.” He’s starting to look distinctly uncomfortable. I guess Avatar-of-Pride street cred only counts in the company of people who actually know what that means.

“I’ve heard a lot about you,” She says, folding her arms and leaning back against the counter. “From your brother. And your other brother.”

“That does not narrow it down,” He replies stiffly. She snorts.

“Tea?” I ask, then hurry to the sink without waiting for an answer. “I’ll put the kettle on.”

Dad taps the counter nervously as it begins to hiss. Then, probably a little too late, he adds, “Lucifer, this is Lisa…”

“Ms. Cassidy to you,” She tacks on sharply, and Dad and I exchange wide-eyed looks.

Neither Belphie nor Satan got the surname-only treatment. Heck, most of her clients don’t get the surname-only treatment. Then again, Satan and Belphie are quite possibly the worst demons for Aunt Lisa to have gotten her first impressions of Lucifer from, even if they didn’t just outright lie for fun.

I try to remember what I might have told her about him. It’s not like I’ve given her any horror stories, but I guess there are a lot of Lucifer traits that only become likeable once you’ve gotten used to his personality...

The kettle finishes boiling. I clear my throat and occupy myself with making the tea. Maybe I should be doing more to dissolve the tension, but I kind of don’t know how - besides, I didn’t even know Lucifer would be here today. I haven’t had any time to prepare a defence for him - no powerpoint, flashcards, anything...

Dad fiddles anxiously with his watch for a moment, then suggests (though he sounds more like he’s making a plea), “Everyone - sit down?”

Aunt Lisa gives Lucifer one more long look, then shrugs and pulls up a chair. Lucifer waits for her to sit down properly before doing the same.

“So what do you do for a living?” She asks him smoothly.

He opens his mouth and pauses. I realise that I don’t actually know the answer to that question, either - does he count as a government worker? Something teacher-adjacent? Actually, the others aren’t in employment, either. Where do they get their money from?

“I’m…” Lucifer deliberates over his words for a moment. ‘Deputy head of the student council’ probably wouldn’t sound very impressive, but technically 'second-in-command to the prince' isn't a title he officially has, and could arguably belong to Barbatos. “Ahem...”

“He works for Diavolo,” I say helpfully. “The prince.”

“The prince,” Aunt Lisa repeats. The corner of her lip twists slightly. “And what do you do - polish his shoes? Put on a jingly hat and dance?”

It isn't the 1600s anymore! Lucifer’s mouth tightens. Before he can get out a scathing reply, I interject again, “He does admin and stuff.”

“Oh, so you’re the paperwork guy,” She says with some dry amusement, pausing briefly to give me a smile as I set her tea down. “And are you busy? Managing hell, I mean.”

“...we don’t run the whole Devildom from one office.”

“No, I suppose you don’t.”

I opt to stay by the counter as the exchange continues, like a game of extremely terse ping-pong. Dad - watching all of this with a kind of slowly mounting dread - abruptly starts rifling around in the cupboard.

“Biscuits,” He says a little breathlessly, setting a plateful on the table with a loud clack!, effectively breaking the momentum of the match.

Aunt Lisa breaks eye contact with Lucifer for the first time in the last ten minutes to give Dad a fond smile. “Thanks, love.”

Lucifer shoots her a funny look - which I'm pretty sure he doesn't think anyone sees - and schools his expression straight back to neutrality when Aunt Lisa turns back to him. She pushes the plate forward a little.

“Custard cream?” She suggests sweetly.

“...thank you.”

She quirks a brow and settles back, focusing on her mug. Lucifer regards her carefully, then lifts the biscuit to his mouth.

As soon as his mouth is full, Aunt Lisa asks, “How much does the prince pay you?”

Lucifer’s face twitches. Having to hold up the illusion of courtesy is clearly beginning to get to him. He drains the last of his tea, then releases a sigh.

“Whatever it is you want to say to me, say it.” He doesn’t bother answering her question. “Say it. There’s no need to beat around the bush.”

“Alright.” Aunt Lisa fixes him with a cold look. “I don’t like you.”

A long pause. Dad dithers briefly, then sits down as well. Rather than mitigating the tension, though, it only seems to manoeuvre around him, like water around a rock in the middle of a river - no more words are said, but they’re both staring hard enough for the tension to practically become verbal. One after another, while they don't think the other's paying attention, both Aunt Lisa and Lucifer shoot him mildly apologetic looks.

“You’ve only just met him,” I decide to come to Lucifer's defence, seeing as he doesn't seem to intend to do it himself. “You don’t really know him."

“From what I’ve heard, I don’t want to.”

Lucifer’s brow creases. Then realisation dawns, and he turns to me with an unimpressed frown. “Satan and Belphie?”

“Probably Satan and Belphie,” I confirm with a mild grimace, and he gives another, longer sigh.

“Ms. Cassidy,” He starts after a moment, perfectly collected again, “I hope you realise that my younger brothers aren’t going to give you objective assessments of my character.”

She snorts. “Does Zhao think it’s cute when you use big words?”

“Have another biscuit,” Dad mutters before Lucifer can respond, shoving the plate towards her with maybe a little more force than necessary. “...A-Ke, can you let Hyde in?”

“Eh?” I listen for a moment. Sure enough, there’s a scratching from the kitchen door.

Hyde meows loudly as soon as it opens, then slips in before it can shut again. He scans the room with enormous green eyes, notes the foreign person, and immediately makes a beeline in his direction.

“...hello,” Lucifer says in mild surprise as Hyde rubs his cheek against his leg. “Where did you come from?”

He leans down to give him a scratch behind the ears. Aunt Lisa watches all of this with what can only be described as an air of betrayal. I don’t know what she was expecting - Hyde’s the friendliest old man any of us know.

Hyde’s favourite treat also happens to be cheese from our fridge, so I get him a little chunk and wave Lucifer over. He seems relieved to get away from the table (though he'd never admit it, of course). Under my whispered instruction, he crouches down and gingerly proffers the cheese in an open palm.

“You’ve met already,” Aunt Lisa notes, then turns her stare on Dad, who quickly looks in the other direction. “How many times has Lucifer been in your kitchen, Zhao?”

“I haven’t counted…”

“And you didn’t think I’d want to meet the man who kidnapped your daughter?”

“That’s not fair,” I object. “I got summoned. And it was Diavolo, not Lucifer. That’s different.”

Aunt Lisa turns to look at the two of us, still crouched beside Hyde, who’s devoured his cheese and is now sniffing at Lucifer’s sleeves for more. The look on her face is… dangerous. “Do you think that makes it any better?”

I’m just trying to make things less tense. I blink at her nervously, then reply, voice tiny, “No?”

Lucifer glances at me, then sighs and stands up straight again. Hyde lets out a dismayed meow, but immediately forgets about the non-existent cheese he was looking for as I start scratching his chin.

“Ms. Cassidy,” Lucifer says, suddenly sterner now, “I realise that we made several ill-advised choices, but IK was not involved in any of those decisions. I’d appreciate it if you left her out of this discussion.”

“Not involved? They happened to—” Aunt Lisa cuts herself off, then folds her arms. “No. Fine. I've plenty to say, mind - I just promised I wouldn’t go on about it.”

Hyde trills and flops down on his side. I run my hand down his fur as he purrs, keeping one eye on Lucifer as he crosses the room to take his seat again.

“We made the decision before we’d met IK," He says. "Now that I understand - I’d be furious if I’d been in your place, too. I don't blame you.”

“Understand what?” She asks, challenging.

Lucifer doesn’t falter. “Believe it or not - IK is an irreplaceable part of our family.”

I quickly look down at Hyde to disguise a smile. Aunt Lisa doesn’t seem to have a response for that - after a moment, I hear a crunch, and look up just in time to see her give him a begrudging nod, biscuit in mouth.

Neither of them says anything. Lucifer picks up his cup, then sets it down again.

“Mrs Prescott has a new rabbit,” Dad says a little helplessly as the silence stretches on. “Across the road. It’s very cute.”

“That’s nice, Zhao,” says Aunt Lisa.

“What’s its name?” Lucifer asks.

Panic crosses his face. “I… don’t remember.”

Hyde’s purring slows and quietens. He looks backwards at Lucifer, then twists to look at Aunt Lisa. I play idly with one of his paws, then stand up.

“Bake Off’s on tonight,” I say. “Let’s watch it together, shall we?"

#i was a little stuck on what to write so i settled on aunt lisa being an instinctive lucifer hater lol #also zhao has quite a small part in this and that's bc i've got stuff planned for him and lucifer in other things #3rd anni event #obey me #writing #obey me lucifer #jtta ik #jtta zhaoxi #jtta lisa #first time i've tagged her before dang #i still need to draw her and some other jtta side chrs actually

[jeanmoreaux]

PLEASE WATCH PUSHING DAISIES oh my gosh i love it so much

i put it at the top of my 'to watch' list, cossette, just for you <3

#i trust your taste 😌 #and your wonderful editing/gifing skills are very convincing as well #it also does look and sound like something that'd be right up my alley. #so many reasons to finally start it actually #answer