#there are sad songs about heartbreak on the album and i think his statement was more pointed at those | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

zukkaart · 7 months

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zukka + Lover album!!

I am SO excited for this one because it gave meeee

"Miss Americana and the Heartbreak Prince" !!! Let's get right down to it for the prompt game!

(Sorry these prompts are taking so long for me to get through school has been crazy)

**** long post ****

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Highschool AU, Zuko is captain of the volleyball team, Sokka is the head of the drama club

"So sad we paint the town blue, voted most likely to run away with you"

Sokka sang quietly to himself as he pressed the piano keys slowly. He was becoming increasingly more frustrated. He'd been stuck on this song he was writing for weeks now. He had the middle and the end but the beginning was eluding him in the most frustrating way.

The eighteen year old boy looked up at the clock hung crookedly against the far wall of the rehearsal room. Nearly five o'clock. His last class had ended hours ago. Sokka had loaded up his classes his junior year so now, as a senior he only had half days.

He usually stayed an hour or so to take advantage of the free instruments in the practice room, but today he was biding his time until the mens homecoming volleyball game. Usually he didn't bother with sports events -maybe a soccer game here and there- but that was mainly because he enjoyed being outside.

But today, his friend Yue had practically begged him to go with her because she was supposed to be meeting someone from another school on a date and she was nervous. He reluctantly agreed to her delight. In reality, he didn't mind. He liked volleyball but he liked the captain of the team much more. It's why he typically didn't go to those games.

That might not make sense to most people, but to Sokka it made perfect sense. The further away from Zuko he stayed, the less likely he was to make a fool of himself, and the more likely it would be that his crush would pass. Although, over the course of the last two years that hadn't seemed to work.

"Sokka! You ready to go?" Yue burst through the door of the practice room wearing her favorite purple mom jeans and blue crop top, her white hair in a flowing fishtail braid that hit her lower back.

"Yeah yeah I'm ready," He closed the lid of the piano and stood.| "How do I look?" She spun in a circle with her arms out. "Perfect as always," He gave her a quick kiss on her temple, "Let's go"

They won the game three sets to one.

The next morning Sokka was shoving his books into his locker when an almost unfamiliar voice came from behind him.

"Hey Sokka," He jumped and spun around, startled. To find Zuko standing close enough to lean over him slightly, smirking the same way he did on the court.

"Hey, uh- hey me?" Sokka pointed at his own chest dumbly, "Yeah, hey you. I saw you at my game last night." "Oh! Yeah," Sokka blushed, "Homecoming you know? I went to the soccer game after too,"

Zuko's brow furrowed slightly at that, but only for a moment.

"I see. Well, did you enjoy it at least?" "What part?" Sokka flirted, with more confidence than he felt, and immediately regretted it.

"Any of it. All of it." Zuko entertained him, seemingly amused by his question. "Well, you almost missed you serve in the first set." Sokka spoke before he could think.

But Zuko didn't look insulted at all. In fact, a small but honest smile broke out across his features.

"You were watching me that closely?" He asked, leaning in closer.

Sokka said nothing, just stared at him so long that Zuko had to break the awkwards silence himself.

"Well, I've got class, but maybe you can meet me later and tell me about more of my mistakes." He said it as a statement. Not a question. As if he already knew that Sokka would say yes.

"It wasn't a mistake really I didn't mean to-" "At six. The coffee shop around the corner." Zuko interrupted, and brought his thumb up to brush Sokka's jawline. Sokka regained his nerve then.

"No," Zuko's smile dropped "No? Why? Did I do something?"

Sokka scoffed. "Are you even aware of your own reputation?" To Zuko's credit, he looked genuinely confused.

"No not really, I don't listen to gossip. What do they say?" "They call you the heartbreak prince." Sokka clarified matter-of-factly.

The taller boy let out a short but genuine laugh and covered his mouth with one hand.

"Are you being serious?" "Unfortunately," "Unfortunately?" "Yes" "Why unfortunately?" "Because it means that anyone associated with you has nothing short of a storm coming their way," Sokka closed his locker and made to turn back towards his next class, but an arm shot out in front of him blocking the way.

"Oh come on, you know that's ridiculous. I'm just a guy," Zuko didn't drop his arm even as Sokka turned to face him again, holding his books tight to his chest.

"You play stupid games, you win stupid prizes Zuko." "What's that supposed to mean?" "It means that you shouldn't start a fight you can't win,"

That easy smirk returned to the taller boys features

"Are you saying that there's someone I'll have to fight for you?" "No." Sokka said too quickly. "But I can't be the center of gossip," "Well that's my whole world. You know what they say about you?"

It was Sokka's turn to be shocked. He wasn't anyone. He composed his music and directed his plays in near anonymity. Sure he partied a lot, but it was usually because one of his friends insisted he come.

"They say you're a bad boy, that you're trouble, and that I shouldn't take a gamble on you."

Sokka's mouth dropped open slightly in shock.

"What? I've never done anything that could even remotely warrant that!" "Sokka, at Jet's party last week you basically imploded his entire clique," "He deserved it! They deserved to know the kind of person they were hanging out with," "Hey, I'm not disagreeing, but you also can't say you haven't earned it" "What about you then?" He poked Zuko in the chest sharply, "What makes you so perfect? You're on the cover of the school newspaper every week," "What can I say? They like a pageant smile, but I promise that being amazing at volleyball and smiling for a camera isn't all there is to me"

Sokka rolled his eyes at the arrogance, but couldn't help himself

"Prove it" "Let me. I'll pick you up at seven,"

"Fine. But if you're late I'm not opening the door." "Deal." A more genuine smile graced Zuko's features then. He leaned down and placed a kiss on Sokka's cheek. "See you then," And strode off in the opposite direction.

Sokka didn't bother going to his next class. He practically sprinted to the practice room

You know I adore you, I'm crazier for you Than I was at 16, lost in a film scene Waving homecoming queens, marching band playing I'm lost in the lights...

#avatar the last airbender #sokka #atla #sokka avatar the last airbender #zuko #zukka nation #zuko x sokka #zukka au #prompt #zukka fic #zukka one shot #asks #prompt game

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binderclipdocs · 3 years

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Hello! I’m wondering what your take is on Dear Friend (and especially “I’m in love with a friend of mine”?) I find the song a little confusing, and I’ve read a lot of different interpretations. I really love your films and I know you’ve done a lot of research, would love to know what you think. Thanks!

Thanks for your appreciation, anon! I love Dear Friend and am happy to share my thoughts on this haunting, mournful, mysterious song!

I’ll be the first to admit the lyrics are confusing (like so many McCartney songs!), mostly by virtue of the fact that Paul uses “friend” twice in a row. Are there two friends, or only one? By using the word “friend” on top of each other as he does, it suggests either a single friend (the titular “Dear Friend”) in two situations OR two friends, in separate/competing situations.

Dear Friend, throw the wine

I’m in love with a friend of mine

Really, truly, young and newlywed

Of course, everyone is entitled to their own opinion, interpretation, fantasy, etc. and no one but McCartney himself can definitively declare precisely what he meant with this song. But it’s my opinion that Paul was saying the latter; that he is in love with his friend and new wife, Linda. This is my conclusion after having deeply researched this period extensively for TWO documentary series (McCartney (2020) and Understanding Lennon/McCartney), an opinion that obviously no one is required to entertain and anyone is free to discard. But for those who are interested, I’ll share my reasoning below.

Firstly, this is NOT an attempt to disprove that Paul was ever in love with John or vice verse. They both used this term publicly and therefore probably/possibly did privately with each other as well. But Paul’s statements in April, 1970 pretty clearly spell out the situation:

“Personally, I don’t think John could do the Beatles thing now. I don’t think it would be good for him.

John’s in love with Yoko, and he’s no longer in love with the other three of us. And let’s face it, we were in love with the Beatles as much as anyone.”

So John and Paul were “in love” (with each other as people, or the Beatles as a concept, or Lennon/McCartney as a team, etc) for a long time. But by 1970, they both have new spouses and new lives and are following different paths. Here’s a brief recap of the events that led to this statement:

In a now-famous meeting in September 1969, John told Paul that he was leaving the Beatles and wanted a divorce. Whether this was an idle threat designed to scare/hurt Paul, or a real desire on John’s part is open to interpretation, but Paul, for his part, took it seriously.

Allen Klein asked John not to go public with his decision to leave the group and John happily and uncharacteristically agreed to sit on this “news” indefinitely. Paul subsequently disappeared for 6-8 weeks, mourned the loss of the band privately in Scotland, and then began working on his first solo album. Communication between John and Paul fell apart at that point, and John began a campaign of maneuvers - possibly engineered or facilitated by Klein - to bring Paul back into the Beatles’ fold and force him to submit to Klein’s management and John’s leadership. Backed into a proverbial corner by John, George, Ringo, Yoko and Klein, Paul played the last card he had: he quit.

In April 1970, Paul made the split official (deliberately or accidentally? YMMV) with the release of his first solo LP, and attempted to finalize the divorce with an uncooperative John for the remainder of the year. As is pretty well-documented, Paul tried for a quick and amicable split, requesting a release from the Beatles’ contract. But after John was unresponsive and Allen Klein advised him to set duplicitous legal traps that would prevent Paul from separating from the Beatles, Paul (as advised by his lawyers) decided to sue for divorce by the end of 1970.

By 2020, even the most casual Beatles fans know two basic truisms: 1) that Paul loved John always and 2) that Paul didn’t want the band to break up. Of course there’s more to the story than just that. We have also been told repeatedly that John “left Paul,” but this is not the whole truth either.

Essentially what John did was yell “I’m breaking up with you!” and then block the door every time Paul tried to leave.

As late as September, 1971 John is still saying publicly that he hopes Paul will return.

Int.: Let's talk a bit about Paul's aversion to Klein. From what we've read it seemed as if this wasn't there in the beginning, even though Paul wanted the Eastmans to run things. But it came on later as things progressed. And yet despite this, we gather that Klein was still hoping that Paul would return to the group.

John: Oh, he'd love it if Paul would come back. I think he was hoping he would for years and years. He thought that if he did something, to show Paul that he could do it, Paul would come around. But no chance. I mean, I want him to come out of it, too, you know. He will one day. I give him five years, I've said that. In five years he'll wake up.

[Narrator voice: Paul did not came back.]

Yes, Paul loved John. No, Paul didn’t want the Beatles to break up.

But when John said he wanted out, Paul took him seriously, respected his decision, never made a single attempt to woo John back and showed up 6 months later with a moving van and divorce papers.

When you hear Dear Friend out of context -knowing only that Paul loved John and was sad after the breakup- it’s not wholly unreasonable to think maybe Paul was declaring his eternal love for John here:

I’m in love with a friend of mine really, truly, young and newlywed

But when you experience Dear Friend in the proper context, that interpretation sounds less and less likely. Here’s Paul:

April 21, 1970

“I’m not blaming her. I’m blaming me. You can’t blame John for falling in love with Yoko any more than you can blame me for falling in love with Linda.

We tried writing together a few more times, but I think we both decided it would be easier to work separately. I told John on the phone the other day that at the beginning of last year I was annoyed with him. I was jealous because of Yoko, and afraid about the break-up of a great musical partnership. It’s taken me a year to realise that they were in love. Just like Linda and me."

Summer 1970

Paul writes John a 12-page letter requesting that they “let each other out of the trap.” John’s response was a picture of himself and Yoko with a balloon drawn above his head saying “How and Why?”

Paul responded: “How? By singing a paper that says we hereby dissolve our partnership. Why? Because there is no partnership.”

April 16, 1971

PAUL: “We used to get asked at press conferences, 'What are you going to do when the bubble bursts?' When I talked to John just the other day, he said something about, 'Well, the bubble's going to burst.' And I said, 'It has burst. That's the point. That's why I've had to do this, why l had to apply to the court. You don't think I really enjoy doing that kind of stuff. I had to do it because the bubble has burst-- everywhere but on paper.' That's the only place we're tied now.”

Nov 11, 1971

MM: But John said to me that what you’d done in bringing the [court] trials up and everything was what they all wanted, that you’d just done it a lot earlier than they would have done.

PAUL: Well if that’s true, well… well, come on! That’s – see, I’ve told you… The joke is, though, that we don’t have to do trials. It’s not necessary. If the four Beatles signed a bit of paper, or even ripped the old contract up and said, “This contract is no longer valid, we all hereby said it, we all legally direct the shareholders…” the whole thing, to wind it all up, we could do it. And if that’s really what he wants, he could do it this minute. [snaps fingers]

Furthermore, Paul was deeply in love with Linda during this period, as reflected by: the songs on both McCartney and RAM, the testimony of those around them at the time and by Paul’s own recollections. The first few years of Paul and Linda’s marriage was their honeymoon period, their era as newlyweds. It was certainly an awful time for Paul in many respects: the business battles of the Beatles were excruciating and extremely stressful and the loss of his three best friends was heartbreaking. Furthermore, the rock press had largely turned against him (sometimes viciously so), and John & Yoko (and Allen Klein) were painting him as a traitor to the counterculture and a villain for destroying the Beatles with his granny music, giant ego and overbearing personality. Paul and Linda were extremely isolated, partially by choice and partially by force.

But even though this was a terrible time for Paul in many respects, he was extremely happy with his new family. He later described this period with Linda as one of the happiest periods of their life. Paul has said numerous times Linda (along with nature and horse-riding) brought him out of depression after the Beatles ended and gave him the strength to push forward with his solo career, at a time when many were rooting against him (and a literal cult was forming that claimed he was DEAD and had been replaced by an inferior imposter- let that sink in for a moment!). He has been consistent about it over the years, and reiterated it as recently as 2020:

UNCUT: Tell me about the guy in the photo n the McCartney sleeve. He looks happy.

PAUL: I was really happy, yeah. The Beatles had become such a business machine, and with the arrival of Allen Klein the whole thing, every day was very unpleasant.

UNCUT: So there you were on the farm, finding solace in a new family...

PAUL: Yes. I had a little place in Scotland. So we just went out there. “It’s so remote, no one can be bothered trekking all the way up here for a meeting.” It was a good period. We grabbed our freedom- you know what, we seized the day! Also, I had a new baby; I’d not been a father before, so I was very happy.

In December of 1970, John gave his infamous Lennon Remembers interview to Rolling Stone. According to the liner notes of the Wildlife reissue from 2018 (and confirmed by the timing of the demo), Paul composed Dear Friend in reaction to John’s comments in that interview (not How Do You Sleep, as is commonly believed). But he sat on the song for awhile and didn’t record it until late 1971 (for inclusion on Wildlife). Judging from the tone of Too Many People and other songs on RAM, Paul’s initial sadness, confusion and disappointment gradually morphed into (or perhaps swung back and forth between) anger and defiance, accompanied by a taunting and/or gloating tone. Having gotten Dear Friend out of his system, it seems it simply didn’t fit thematically on RAM. Perhaps after the release of HDYS, Paul was deflated and despondent enough to return to Dear Friend? Perhaps Jealous Guy tempered or calmed Paul’s anger?

Or maybe it was just a genuine attempt to turn the heat down. We know that immediately following its release, John and Paul agreed (seemingly at Paul’s insistence) to quit bickering in public.

In any case, Dear Friend is a complex songs with a spectrum of emotions. Unlike Jealous Guy it is not apologetic; it’s mournful but also incredulous and slightly accusatory. Paul appears to be calling John’s bluff: Do you really believe all the bullshit you’re spewing?

Are you a fool, or is it true?

The John Lennon of Lennon Remembers is without hope or faith, denouncing everything he ever believed in and everyone he ever trusted -with the notable exceptions of Allen Klein, Phil Spector and Yoko. Paul clearly loves John and hopes to salvage their relationship, but Dear Friend was written at a time when John was being manipulated and exploited by people he later admitted were misplaced “daddy figures.” While Klein and Spector turned out to not be the most reliable friends to John, Paul certainly seems to know and understand John’s vulnerabilities and motivations better than most. As he sings in the demo:

Are you afraid? Or are you blue?

So why does Paul mention that he’s newlywed and in love with Linda? Firstly, because he is, and he wants to celebrate with his best friend. We know Paul’s desire was for the two couples to make peace and be friends. Pour the Wine. Clink glasses and celebrate their new marriages together.

PAUL: Dear Friend was to do with John, a bit of longing about John. Let’s have a glass of wine and forget about it. A making up song. (July 2001).

This is precisely what the two couples did in December of 1971, immediately following the release of Wildlife.

JOHN: We were both nervous, the four of us were nervous. I hadn’t seen him for a long time. I’d spoken on the phone [with him]. Uh, it was alright, you know. It was alright.

This is precisely what happened again throughout 1974 (with John & May Pang this time around), which John affectionately called their “Beaujolais evenings.”

Admittedly, It may seem odd for Paul to mention that he is happily married (and in love with another “friend”) in a make up song to John. Until you think about the romantic tension between John and Paul and Paul’s bold public recognition of it with this statement: “It’s taken me a year to realise that they were in love. Just like Linda and me.” Paul acknowledges here that John is in love with Yoko and wants John to acknowledge his love for Linda as well.

In Dear Friend he’s communicating that there is nothing to fear; they are secure in their respective marriages, there is no need to be hurt or angry or jealous anymore. We’re no longer partners, but we can still be friends. “Let’s have a glass of wine and forget about it.” A softer, gentler version of: Wake up, John. It’s over. Sign the fucking papers already.

So I think of Dear Friend as an olive branch, but not the groveling type some apparently do. And I most definitely do not think it was a signal to John that Paul was still in love with him, despite being newlywed to Linda.

I suppose it might seem a bit brutal for Paul to be singing about loving someone else in a song to John (although he’s done it before and I think John has done the same). But I honestly think it is something Paul believes John needs to hear and accept at this point; that he is “really, truly” in love with Linda and that he’s not about to divorce her or run after the first “blonde with big tits” as Allen Klein so charmingly suggested.

By September 1971, John still hasn’t seemed to accept Linda, or Paul’s relationship with her:

John: Paul always wanted the home life, you see. [... long, rambling story about being terrified when Paul got a job in 1961 and for a second looked as if he might abandon John and the group]

All the other girls were just groupies mainly. And with Linda not only did he have a ready-made family, but she knows what he wants, obviously, and has given it to him. The complete family life. He's in Scotland. He told me he doesn't like English cities anymore. So that's how it is.

Int.: So you think with Linda he's found what he wanted?

John: I guess so. I guess so. I just don't understand . . . I never knew what he wanted in a woman because I never knew what I wanted.

With comments like this John seems (IMO) to be twisting himself into knots trying to rationalize Paul’s choice of Linda, practically wondering aloud what could she give him that I couldn’t? He still seems unwilling to face or accept what Paul begrudgingly accepted and admitted years before: that his partner fell in love with someone else.

Here’s 76 year old Paul reminiscing about this tender, bittersweet time in his life, happy and in love with his wife and young family and simultaneously in deep pain over losing his dearly beloved best friend:

I remember when I heard the song recently, listening to the roughs in the car. And I thought, ‘Oh God’. That lyric: ‘Really truly, young and newly wed’. Listening to that was like, ‘Oh my God, it’s true!’ I’m trying to say to John, ‘Look, you know, it’s all cool. Have a glass of wine. Let’s be cool.’

“Let’s be cool.” Not “Please take me back,” not “Ignore my just-for-show marriage, I’m still in love with YOU.” To me, Paul is saying “I’m really, truly in love with my friend and new wife, can we please just be happy for each other? It’s all cool.” And for the record, I don’t find this sentiment any less loving on Paul’s part because I don’t think Paul being in love with his own wife (which he was), detracts from his love for John in any way. Again, I agree that the lyrics are slightly ambiguous, and perhaps this is meaningful too. It could be that the lack of hard boundary between the two friends (John and Linda) reflects how much Paul loves them both; they certainly aren’t positioned as opposites (i.e. I love her but I hate you). Instead they’re both part of the imagined celebration; Paul wants them all to share the wine together- and he wants them to tolerate (love) each other.

I think the traditional narrative doesn’t account for all of this because the traditional narrative does not acknowledge that John has any feelings for Paul in the first place. How in the world could Paul be asking John to “be cool” and accept the new situation when John didn’t even care about Paul in the first place and had been trying to get rid of him for years? This perception - of John gleefully blasting Paul with HDYS and Paul replying that he’s in love with John - has taken hold in many minds and has picked up a lot of steam in recent years with so-called “jean jackets” because they fundamentally believe that Paul’s love for John was one-sided. They cannot comprehend that Paul would ever tell John to “cool it” or back off in any way (even in 70-71) because they take the surface story at face value: John dumped Paul for Yoko and heartbroken Paul spent the rest of his life desperately trying to win John back. This is the narrative depicted in virtually every book I’ve read. My analysis is based on my own research, not this narrative.

I would invite readers of this post to watch (or re-watch) ULM (particularly volume 3 ) for a more comprehensive study of John and Paul’s relationship.

Lastly, after doing my own independent research for McCartney (2020), I found that the Paul McCartney described by the musicians and collaborators in Paul’s life was dramatically different from the person depicted in books like Man on the Run. My films are free from narration and commentary; I rely on first-hand interviews and information from the people involved, and in my opinion there is a great deal to be learned about Paul from the way he relates to others, especially through music. And although the McCartney series is about his solo career as opposed to his Beatle career, I would definitely recommend it to anyone who is interested in Lennon/McCartney for the insights they could gain.

Thank you very much for this ask- hopefully there aren’t too many typos!

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dreamescapeswriting · 4 years

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The Writing Game ~ KNJ [Request]

↬↬↬Word Count: 3.3K

↬↬↬Pairing: Namjoon x Fem!Reader

↬↬↬Genre: Producer AU, fluffy, cute, first kiss, first I love you, confessions

"Are you willing to put money on that?" That's all you'd heard when you walked into the lounge in the BigHit building that night, it had been a super long day and you were ready to sleep but you'd heard Jimin first and wondered what he was talking about. Your eyes left your phone to see Jimin, Jungkook and Namjoon all staring at one another,

"Are you placing bets on Jin and his girlfriend again?" They'd been placing bets on how long it would take for Jin or his girlfriend to call off the wedding that they had been planning for months, your hand came into contact with the back of Jimin's head and Jungkook ducked so you couldn't get to him.

"No! We're betting on something else." You smirked dropping down between Jimin and Jungkook,

"Let's hear it then," You waited for a response but it was clear none of them were going to tell you what it was so you got up from the seat and walked over to Namjoon. He had been one of your best friends at BigHit, you'd been writing and producing music with him for years.

"Joonie, what is it they're doing?" You put out your bottom lip putting on the sweetest act you could while trailing your hands over his shoulders.

"T-They're placing bets on who could make the best song for the album." Jimin frowned hearing Namjoon stutter, he had no idea that you had that effect on his leader but now he'd seen it he wanted to see it again.

"We know you're the best team but when we put our heads together, we're better." You scoffed at Jimin's comment rubbing Namjoon's shoulders, you had no idea the things you did to Namjoon. He'd had a huge crush on you when you first started working there but he never did anything about it because of the company rules. ''No dating other staff members'' It was a simple rule to follow but not for Namjoon, he felt himself falling harder for you every day you spent time together.

"That's the biggest lie, me and Namjoon could kick your ass with our eyes closed." You scoffed moving away from Namjoon and sitting back down with the boys, Jimin smirked. It was going to be easier than ever to make you work together so closely. Namjoon caught on pretty quick to what Jimin was hinting at,

"Jimin we're busy Y/n doesn't want to bother herself-"

"Sure I do, Namjoon we're the best and we'll win in no time." Your confidence was boosting any other time Namjoon would have jumped at the chance but he could tell there was a catch from Jimin coming,

"We have until Friday to finish a song each and then we'll present it to Bang PD at the end of the week." Jimin clapped his hands together before Namjoon could even say no you were already shaking on it and writing up the rules to make sure there would be no cheating going on.

"Namjoon come on, we've worked on things together a million times I thought it would be fun...Are you mad at me?" The thought of Namjoon being mad at you made your heart hurt, he'd always been one of your many inspirations at work and also the guy you'd been madly in love with for the last six years....No one was ever going to know that though, not when you could hide your love for him in songs that he and the boys would sing to.

"I'm not mad I'm just tired Y/n," You could tell by the tone of his voice it wasn't true, that he was clearly mad about something but wasn't about to sit and tell you all of his problems.

"Then let's call it a night, we've been here all day and we both know we can write a banger in a couple of days anyway." It was true, you'd done it before. Writing hit songs with Namjoon by your side was one of the easiest things, you could bounce ideas off one another easily, nothing was ever off-limits to talk, rap or sing about together.

"Why don't we use one of our drafts and just say we wrote it?" He grumbled at you, he didn't want to be sat in a room with you all week, having his emotions run high whenever you sat close to him or smiled at him. His eyes landed on your face and he saw you tearing up, he instantly realised how much of a dick he was sounding and he felt bad,

"It's not that I don't want to Y/n it's just-"

"It's whatever, just tell Jimin we lose." He took hold of your wrist promising you that he would take it seriously tomorrow after he'd gone home and gotten some rest.

"Go home, get rested and come back tomorrow okay?" He questioned looking deep into your eyes he wanted to make sure he hadn't hurt your feelings, it was one of the last things he'd ever want to do.

"Sure." You smiled reassuringly at him and grabbed your car keys,

"Do you want a ride back?" He shook his head at the question, he'd ridden his bike that morning so he would just ride that home instead.

Tuesday:

The whole morning you and Namjoon had been sat in his studio trying to decide if it was going to be a classic love song or if he wanted to do something completely different. Deciding that both of you wanted to write about love,

"Who do you think about when you're writing?" You questioned looking away from your piece of paper, you had pages full of small lyrical paragraphs all about the guy sitting right across from you on the sofa inside of his office. You had your legs resting against his while he had his resting against the sofa hiding the pad from you which, much like yours, was covered in small paragraphs about you.

"Just someone I hold dear, you?" You looked down at the page, you don't know why you'd expected him to say you. You'd always hoped he liked you but as the years went by you realised there was nothing there between you except friendship.

"Same really," He frowned looking at you, you were scribbling things down like crazy and you had the look of sadness across your face.

"Did they hurt you?" You laughed softly, you felt pathetic telling him all of this since it was him you were truly talking about.

"No, he doesn't even know I like him." His hands clutched onto the pen he was holding, you liked someone- You loved someone? He wasn't angry with you he was angry at whoever was taking you away from him...Not that you were his but someone else held you close to them and hurt you with it.

"Why don't you tell him?" You scoffed loudly and started laughing at the statement almost forgetting that it was him you were talking about,

"He's not interested in me like that, I just need to deal with it and move on." Namjoon nodded along to what you were saying feeling slightly hopeful that you were willing to move on from whoever was hurting you like this,

"What if we channelled that?" You frowned not following along with what he was asking of you,

"Wrote a song about moving on? Or feeling heartbreak?" You nodded a little trying to think of ways you could work it out, you didn't want to move on from Namjoon but getting the feelings of your heart being broken up would help a little, it was a genre of song you weren't exactly good in though.

"I've never tried heartbreak songs-"

"I'll help," He rushed his sentence a little too much but he was desperate to help you move on, he didn't like seeing you hurt he wanted to do something he knew would help, channelling emotions helped him and he knew for a fact that he helped you a lot as well.

Wednesday:

The whole Tuesday was spent writing lyrics together while Namjoon went onto the piano, you were going to have a slow song. Heartbreak was meant to be about channelling all of your emotions and effort into the one song and feeling each lyric that you were going to be singing. Namjoon had decided to add a small rap into the song as a verse, writing about how he felt about you. All of the heartbreak he felt around you and how he could never be with you, how you could never truly be his when you were in love with someone else. Today had been a long day and you hadn't had time to come and produce some of the song with Namjoon. You were supposed to be working on it together but he knew how busy you got when you came into work. It wasn't just BTS that you worked with, you worked with a lot of the other groups in the building along with your own work that you never let anyone see or hear.

"I've been with Soobin and the boys all day I'm sorry." You said to Namjoon when you saw him coming out of his office, he shook his head promising you that it was fine but it didn't feel fine to you,

"I finished putting the backing onto a track it's fine-"

"No, Namjoon we're supposed to work together." He placed his hand on your wrist, he knew for a fact that you had been in the big hit building from 5 am that morning because he'd checked the staff sign-in sheet when he came in. You were always pulling those, coming in super early and not leaving until really late, Namjoon hated that you pushed yourself like this but he also adored how dedicated to it you were that you were willing to do all of the overtime if it meant it would pay off.

"Go home, we're done for the day I promise." You nodded along not planning on listening to him,

"Want a ride?" You asked you knew for a fact that he didn't need one because you could see the keys to his bike lock in his hand and the helmet in his bag

"No I'm okay, come on." You walked towards the elevator together you were trying to act a though you were really going to leave and not come back into the building when you knew he wasn't going to be there.

The moment you knew Namjoon was gone you rushed back up to his studio, removing the spare key from your bag and making your way inside. Everything was still on his three monitors and you smiled walking over to them and sitting down in the huge chair he liked to use. You just wanted to hear what he had done with the track and then maybe improve on it a little, it had to be perfect since it was about him and he didn't even know it. You wanted it to sound so good that Jimin would cry the moment he heard you both singing on the track, you hit play and the song began to come in from the speakers. None of the singing you had recorded was there yet but the piano playing along to the tune you'd written was.

Clicking the space bar again you tried to pause it but somehow - even though you'd been using the system for years - it deleted the entire piano section, along with the singing piece you'd recorded for the song.

"What?! No!" You yelled trying to undo it but the computer kept crashing the system,

"Fuck he's going to kill me." You whimpered pulling up a new project and going to input the singing back on only to see that it was deleted from the entire system. Everything except for the piano which was within a different folder was gone. You were going to be in for a long night of rerecording the lyrics and the producing it all before you went home.

Thursday:

Namjoon came in early that morning, he wanted to make sure you hadn't done what he thought you were going to do - sneak back inside and do some extra work.

"You have a present in your studio," Jimin smirked as he came out of the elevator on the ground floor, JImin had walked in and saw you asleep wearing one of Namjoon's hoodies and a pair of leggings it must have been cold there last night.

"What are you-" Namjoon cut himself short when he remembered that Jimin knew about the crush he had on you and was doing this to force Namjoon to face his feelings about it.

"She's up there?" Jimin nodded frowning when he saw a look of annoyance spread across Namjoon's face,

"What's wrong? I thought you liked Y/n?" Namjoon groaned trying to push his floor button but Jimin slapped his hand away wanting to get answers,

"I do and you know that which is why you're doing this but I told her not to come in last night, she's exhausted Jimin." He pushed the younger boy out of his lift and waited for the doors to clothes. He couldn't help but think about how tired you must be since you'd been there possibly all day.

Opening the door to his studio he was surprised to see you with your head resting on the table, he walked further into the room and sighed when he saw that you were asleep.

"I told you not to come back in here," He whispered scooping you up from the chair being careful so that he wouldn't wake you up, you clearly needed the sleep if you were asleep at the desk. As he laid you down on his sofa you let out a moan before mumbling something and turning over, he smiled hearing you like that and went to get a blanket. He knew that you were in his hoodie, it was one of the favourites he owed and kept at the studio - truth be told he kept it there hoping that you would borrow it whenever you got too cold around him.

"Namjoon-ah." You mumbled in your sleep as he laid the blanket over your body. You snuggled against it waking up but not opening your eyes.

"You're cute when you're asleep," You heard him whisper, you kept your eyes shut trying not to flicker them or give any clue to the fact that you were now awake and listening to everything he was saying,

"I wish I could tell you how I feel you know...Even if it wasn't for this whole staff members aren't allowed to date I don't think I could ever tell you." His hand pushed some hair out of your face but he smiled looking at you,

"I don't think I'd have the confidence to tell you how I feel about you." Your heart clenched at the thought fo Namjoon having any kind of feelings about you, all of this time you'd thought he just saw you as nothing but an annoying sister or something.

"Being in love with you has helped me write so many songs I think I could produce 16 albums all with 22 tracks each." He chuckled at himself before leaving a small kiss on your forehead,

"Get some sleep darling," As soon as the door clicked your sat up and looked around the small office trying to gather your thoughts together.

Friday:

You went home Thursday without seeing Namjoon, you could see him while you were trying to process everything he had said to you, it was a lot. That he was in love with you and wasn't even planning on telling you? Now that you knew you had no idea what to do with yourself if you were supposed to face him knowing that the guy you loved loved you back.

"Y/n?!" You dropped the bag you were carrying, you had been attempting to sneak into the lounge without being seen but Jimin was stood behind you wondering what you were doing.

"What are you doing?" He questioned watching as you bent down to pick up the bag and stand up to him again,

"I was going to wor-"

"You have presentations with Namjoon, we're about to show Bang PD the songs-"

"He finished it?!" You hadn't expected Namjoon to do all of the work so you followed along with Jimin towards one of the conference rooms. They were really taking this seriously, the conference rooms weren't normally available to you or any of the boys for that matter.

"Nice of you to join us," Jungkook smirked at you - standing at the front of the conference room getting ready to show their boss their work. PD smiled at you as you bowed to him before sitting down on a chair next to Namjoon.

"You finished it without me?" You whispered looking at him, he was avoiding looking at you but he nodded watching Jimin and Jungkook as they explained what their song was about and began playing it. It was a great song and something that they were used to writing about,

"Namjoon." PD said pointing at you both, you both got up and began explaining the meanings behind it all.

"We decided to go for a heartbreak song, Y/n did the main vocals and I added a rap in for a verse." The music began to play and instantly you felt insecure, the night you'd spent recording came rushing back to you as you poured every emotion you felt for Namjoon into each lyric.

"I think it's clear who the winner is," Bang PD said as he looked over at Jimin and Jungkook who were now crying together, he slid a box of tissues over to them and turned to look at you.

"I can see I made a big mistake hiring you though Miss Y/l/n." Your heart fell out of your chest hitting the floor and smashing into a million pieces,

"I should have signed you, your voice is incredible." Namjoon held onto you as you stumbled backwards a little bit.

"We will be talking soon, I have another meeting." You nodded and watched as he walked out of the room as if he hadn't just proposed hiring you to be one of his employees instead of someone that worked behind the scenes.

"Y/n! That's incredible news!" Namjoon screamed you jumped up and down turning around and throwing your arms around him wanting to celebrate.

"Namjoon-ah!" You giggled pulling away from him slowly but you locked eyes. After that it was like there was no one else in the room with you, Jimin and Jungkook weren't sitting there staring at you anymore you were just looking at one another.

"What?" Namjoon asked as you turned your head to the side, he frowned wondering what you were doing. His heart was racing having you this close to his face but he wasn't about to push you away.

"I love you too." You whispered before smashing your lips against his. His eyes widened as he heard you say the four words he'd been dying to hear but as soon as he came to reality his eyes fluttered shut. Wrapping his arms around your waist he drew you closer to him wanting to keep this kiss going for as long as possible, he was too afraid he would wake up and it would have all bee some kind of ultra-realistic dream he was having about it.

"We...We're just going to leave." Jimin cleared his throat but neither of you heard him and Jungkook getting up and leaving the room together, you were too busy getting lost in your own worlds to bother with them.

Tagline:

@writingdreamsnottragedies @snowy-meowl @jooniesdarlingdimples @lynnthevirgo @lyoongx @mitzwinchester @fan-ati--c @callingmyangel @rjsmochii @kneel-begyourpardon @taestannie @innersooya

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fmdminaharchive · 3 years

Text

❧ you’re like spring.

date(s): february-march 2021 mentions of: daisuke (briefly for happening reasons), jiah (extensively for gay reasons) word count: 1,712 (475 words composition, 748 words songwriting without the lyrics) warnings: none details: partial composition and full lyric verification for ‘the spring’. minah makes music again, it’s more of the same yet different. she’s also grossly in love, though she’s well aware there has been a time she wasn’t. also little extra bits of the whole Process because i can and they’re cute

“how about another spring song?” the creative director suggests and minah is quick to agree.

sure, she has some thoughts on that statement. the expected release date they gave her is late may, pushing near the end of spring but she can’t say she’s surprised. sure, these songs usually do best around early to mid april, when spring is fresh and the temperatures are slowly creeping up together with the bloom of flowers but she wagers that either bc doesn’t give her solo comeback enough priority over whatever else is planned earlier in the year or they’re aiming to recreate the same effect ‘hopefully sky’ had.

it’s kind of ironic, minah thinks, the implied image of a late bloomer bc throws in her lap.

she doesn’t mind it, it kind of suits her in ways.

➽───────────────❥

being informed that she will be working with the same producer she worked on for ‘hopefully sky’ and ‘being there’ only further confirms minah’s suspicions, they’re fully intending to let her stick to her niche. it’s not a bad thing persé, she likes her music, she likes the producer, the whole process will undoubtedly be a delight. but paired with the fact she had been purposely left out of writing for her debut album last fall, minah can’t help but feel bc doesn’t yet trust her quite enough. not enough to write on something important as an album, not enough to write on something she hasn’t done before.

which just means she has to prove herself.

when minah shows up for their first studio session, she shows up prepared, reaching for the acoustic guitar kept in one of the corners of the room

one eyebrow of the producer quirks up. “were you asked to compose it yourself? i thought i was, that’s why i prepared some things-”

minah just shakes her head, smiling serenely. “i wasn’t. but i have something i want to let you hear regardless.”

the guitar parts aren’t all that much, no bells or whistles. but minah likes to think that’s their charm. her instrumentals never are too flashy, not taking the foreground but instead serving as a gentle, guiding hand. the strums and chords are meant to be a base, to frame and support her voice rather than to be the main attraction.

the simple melody reminds her a lot of her busking days back in busan. sure, for the most parts she played and sang popular songs, ones that would be recognized by passersby and hopefully bring a smile to her face. but when things were slower, wen there weren’t as many people around, minah could spend stretches and stretches of time playing around with chords, improvising their structure as she went, their gentle hum to fill the silence until people came by again. it was a comforting sound, a comforting feeling.

of course, this time it’s not mere improvising, not tangent of chords that escape her memory the moment they fade out into the air around them but it still feels that way as she plays the song for the producer, a light-hearted, warm feeling teaching from her fingertips to her chest.

when she finishes the song, minah puts the guitar beside her again, looking expectantly at the producer. “it’s not a full song-” she starts, sentence trailing off, searching for some sign of approval or dismissal, whatever comes first, whatever will tell her if she was right to go out on a limb.

“it’s not.” the producer agrees with a nod. “but it could be.” another beat of silence. “it will be when i turn it into one.”

the excited squeal that escapes minah is one of victory.

➽───────────────❥

“you know, i already wrote lyrics to go with it too.” minah brings up a little while later, by now both of them with a cup of coffee in their hands, having spent the last hour or so properly writing down the guitar part she had played earlier and fiddling with ideas how to expand on it.

“well why didn’t you say so earlier, go ahead, i’m listening.”

so minah quickly pulls out the piece of paper the lyrics are written down on. they’re her words, she has sung them a few times but she doesn’t feel confident enough in her memory to do it entirely by heart just yet.

she picks the guitar up again from where she had left it, leaning against the side of the table, placing her fingers against the fingerboard and strumming the strings, playing the same chords she had played before but this time accompanied by her voice.

i think spring is coming again almost sick of the cherry blossoms once again, i face a lonely season as the wind blows

in terms of sound, the song sounds as warm and comforting as it’s spiritual predecessors ‘hopefully sky’ and ‘being there’ had, the sweet, family-girl charm minah had initially wrapped the general public around her finger with. lyrically, however, the tone is a bit more somber, lonely and longing for the happiness her surroundings seem to have found. it puts it smack in the middle of both her self-written songs from last summer and the tone of her first album and her portal collab with daisuke from last winter. a pretty clever way to bring together the two sides of her sound she has released so far if she says so herself.

that flower is so pretty, it makes me lonely that couple is smiling so brightly making me so sad why is it so beautiful? why am i jealous? everything’s spring spring spring but me

of course, the lyrics are hardly relevant for minah in the moment. she is entering her second spring together with jiah, their relationship having started roughly a year ago, when spring was creeping up on them much like it is now.

but feelings didn’t need to be lived to write about them right, to be able to convey them all the same. minah’s entire ‘epilogue’ had been drenched in the sorrow of heartbreak while she was on cloud nine. much the same applied to this song, there is none of the longing for a spring romance, not when she has all of that right in the palm of her hands already, not when she gets to wake up stroking the messy strands of hair out of jiah’s face and kiss the tip of her nose.

you’re spring, spring spring spring you, where did you go? you’re spring, spring spring spring the spring wind is blowing

minah gets it, she really does, why spring is generally seen as a romantic season, the slow bloom of the world stirring awake after the winter. cherry blossoms showers during walks in the parks, couples huddled together due to the last remnants of cold wind. spring is romantic in it’s very existence. it’s soft, it’s comforting, a gentle welcome after the slumber of winter.

and because of that, jiah is spring too. the pink hues of her flushed cheeks and the radiance of her smile, the tingling sparks of heat left across minah’s skin. she’s warm without ever being overwhelming, like the slowly rising temperatures giving the flowers time to adjust and bloom.

i’m dreaming of a fun love will my sweet love ever come? after another lonely day the wind blows

it hasn’t always been like that though, minah has been familiar enough with the bittersweetness of cherry blossoms. she’s a notorious workaholic after all. for as long as she can remember, she’s always been busy with something, be it her career or her family. it had left ample time for epic romances when she had been far too all over the place to open up her heart and whatever sparks did fly quickly fizzled solely due to the fact minah didn’t have the capacity to nurse a budding romance among everything.

so it isn’t like she doesn’t understand, it wasn’t like she has never kicked the ground scoffing watching the loved-up couples in springtime. minah knows the feeling all too well. so she knows how cathartic songs like this can be. sometimes you just need to be bitter for a bit before carrying on with life.

when the warm spring wind brushes my cheeks will spring come into my frozen heart as well? is it love?

minah has found her own love in the spring, only just a year ago, after watching the seasons slip by so often without much romance of her own.

so minah hopes. she hopes that anyone who will relate to the song hearing it now will find their own spring love eventually. maybe not this season but possibly next, or the one after that.

even if not for many more springs, with every passing year, they’ll be one spring closer to that, and isn’t that enough reason to keep waiting?

➽───────────────❥

a few weeks pass after that, minah doesn’t really keep track of the time where is so much she’s doing anyway but sooner or later, she finds the same producer waiting for her after she leaves vocal practice for lipstick’s upcoming comeback.

“c’mon, i need to steal you away for a second, there is something i want you to listen to.” he explains briefly and minah is quick to follow the familiar path to one of bc’s in-house recording studios.

of course, she knows this is about her solo comeback. she however doesn’t know if her draft got the bc stamp of approval. she might just as well be faced with an entirely different song.

as she takes a seat in one of the office chairs, the producer pulling up a file on his computer gracefully named ‘the spring’ minah feels pretty sure of her case though.

“i finished your song.” he simply says before pressing play.

it’s her song indeed, both of those parts are true. it’s hers, the familiar guitar strums in the background and a demo of her lyrics on top of it. it’s also a song, a full song this time, the blanks that were still missing from her rough draft filled in.

minah really likes it.

when the song comes to an end, she turns to the producer and smiles. “i like the accordion.” she laughs. “it’s a nice touch.”

#fmdverification #*:･ﾟ♔– «am i the only one who remembers» // solos.#«the spring // era.»

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nearlynorth · 3 years

Text

we can’t even be in the same room

The breaking of Luke Patterson and Julie Molina.

Or the fic that shows the aftermath of heartbreak.

Notes:

Now you may be thinking, Nicole, you've never been in a relationship or been broken up with, why are you writing a breakup fic? That's a good question that I don't have an answer to. This is the first of a three part series that I'm working on. The next part will be Julie.

I highly recommend listening to Same Room by JP Saxe when you are reading this. I listened to it on repeat while writing this. If anyone wants the playlist that I so creatively titled "Juke Breakup Fic" it's at this link. Link to spotify playlist

This is technically an au because the boys were never ghosts, but that isn't really something that is addressed or is needed to be known.

Also cross-posted on ao3. This is the first in a three part series that I will eventually manage to get the other two saved into a masterlist on here when I write them.

Disclaimer: I don't own any italicized lyrics or the Julie and the Phantoms characters. I'm also not the first person to write a breakup fic.

I watched a TED Talk on heartbreak

He had a smart person accent

He said, "Don't look through the photos"

Then I looked through our photos

Luke doesn't even know how he does it. How he resists looking through the camera gallery on his phone, the memories documented in photos. How when his heart is pulling itself apart he resists looking at the very things that could sew it back and then tear it apart again.

Luke does know a few things. He knows the post-breakup rules. He's watched a TedTalk, the man speaking with an accent that he knows that she would've loved. And he's already breaking them.

One.

He knows that he isn't supposed to look at the photos. He puts his phone in the car, pretends like it is just a normal day. He lasts two hours. Two hours spent staring blankly at the wall, wondering where they went wrong. He knows, he knows. Two hours and then he breaks. He unlocks his phone and pulls up the photos, the videos, all of what they recorded. Their history was in front of the camera, well-documented and heart-breaking. He lasts two hours and he breaks his first rule.

Two.

He knows that he's not supposed to think about her, to not let himself wallow in his self-pity. But it's hard. It's hard to block her from his mind when their apartment, his apartment, feels like her. Everything reminds her of him.

He will see the wilting dahlias on the counter, their petals falling to the marble. His last-ditch effort, when words failed and he just wasn't enough. Yet he can't bring himself to get rid of them, to finally toss them into the trash. He sees the looks that his friends shoot them when they come over to make sure that he isn't dead. He lets the blossoms rot just like what was supposed to be his great love.

He will see the empty drawers on the other side of their (cross this out) his bedroom and he will remember. It will all come flooding back to him, of how she tore through like a hurricane, pulling clothes out of hidden places and taking it all. She left him nothing, in a million pieces, with nothing left to pull himself together again.

But no, that's not true. He will see a shirt that she forgot, lying alone in a closet. It still smells like her. It's from their first tour, when they were still fumbling teenagers, sneaking glances at each other and pretending like they didn't see the chemistry between them. What he would give to go back to that time, when they were still young. It becomes stained with tears.

He breaks all the rules that he put into place for himself, watching his face in the mirror when he breaks.

I'm tempted to distract myself

I'm trying not to

Cuz I'll make myself feel all of this

If it's all that I got left of you

He debates whether or not he should drown out his sorrows with noise. To fill his days with as many activities as he can, leave no time for his brain to reflect. But his pain is all that he has left of her. All that he has are his wilting memories and his rotting heart.

When the pain goes away she will be gone forever. He will only have half-concocted dreams and plans that have holes as gaping as their bond. He will only have her from the eyes of others, never through the intimate lens of knowing someone so wholly that you know them better than they know themselves.

He will never have a connection that deep, not when they both brought each other back from the brink. He will never love like that again, never be loved like that again. It breaks him.

He takes his pain and he keeps it close to him, his last bitter remnants of something so good.

You came to Portugal in 2014

Just to spend a couple days with me

You flew halfway 'round the world for me

It's a week after she left that he thinks about how they got there. How they got to the point of breaking. He skirts around the bad memories, the ones that he sees now climbing the stairs to the final plateau. He doesn't want to feel the pain but maybe happy memories will make it worse. He doesn't care.

He thinks about a time where everything felt high, long before everything dipped so low. He thinks about a time that he was in Portugal, for a reason that he can't even remember now. He knows what she was doing, shooting her first movie halfway around the world. He remembers how it felt to be apart from her that long, and he remembers how he vowed to never do it again.

She flew half-way around the world just to see him, to make good memories. He remembers the way that her eyes crinkled at the corners when she got off the plane, her smile growing and growing. He remembers the way that he rushed to her, the way that they felt like two puzzle pieces clicking back together as cameras flashed around them.

That separation was only temporary. Now they made the final cut, he broke his promise. They closed the pages of their book, snuffed out their flame. They lost the pieces of their puzzle. He remembers the times when they burned bright, feeling like they would never go down. What he would give to go back.

I swear I'm knocking out the next guy

Who says, "At least you'll get some breakup songs"

'Cause it ain't nearly been enough time

He loves all of the fans. Those that knew him from Sunset Curve and those that found him through Julie and the Phantoms. He loves them, he really does, but sometimes it gets to be too much.

They were public with their relationship, and that only made it so much harder when it came crashing down. Julie and the Phantoms broke up. There was nothing that they could do about that, when it was impossible for the two of them to be in the same place without a shouting match, words being hurled like daggers back and forth. And Reggie didn't need that.

So they had to tell the fans, a bland statement crafted by PR that they posted to Instagram. And then they went silent. They refused to say anything, and the two biggest stars in the music industry dropped off the face of the planet.

Even though he wasn't speaking, it didn't mean that he wasn't listening. He read the comments, saw the direct messages, fans flooding him with praise and support. He appreciated some of it, but some of it only hurt. The messages about songs were his least favorite.

He didn't want to write songs about her, at least not now. Not when the wounds are still bleeding fresh. Not when his heart still beats for her. Not when he hasn't moved on.

They promised each other, when they first started, that they wouldn't write sad songs about each other, at least not at first. They also promised to never leave each other. He is a man of broken promises.

He ignores everyone who says things about breakup songs, even as he listens to a playlist full of them. His Spotify knows him too well. He starts crafting lyrics in his head.

For two weeks, he is silent. No notes slip from his lips, from his fingers. No music comes out of him. He only lasts two weeks. Music comes pouring out of him, lyrics in chicken-scratch inscribed onto paper.

The music is personal, painful, not for him to sing in public. It's not for the band, not for whatever solo album his record label wants him to put out. It's been so long since he's written music just for himself, not because someone told him to. He imagines her doing the same thing, her curls hiding the paper from view. He remembers how she bit her lip while thinking about a song lyric, how she looked up through her eyes lashes when she asked him what he thought.

He remembers it all and he turns it into a song. He sings it to himself and it doesn't make him feel any better, but it's a start.

It's a start down the path of healing, the start of his wounds knitting together. It's a start as he sings himself to sleep, tears collecting in his eyes.

It's hard to summarize three years

More like four years

Depends where you start counting

It don't matter

He doesn't know when they first started. He doubts that she knew either.

If he goes from when they first met, their story starts a lot differently.

She was sixteen, he was seventeen. They were young and naive and bright and starry-eyed. They were two chemicals mixed together in the same beaker, begging to combust. They had a chemistry that they couldn't deny, that everyone could see. They were so high, floating on the clouds. They were performing and they were singing and they were friends.

If he goes from when they became something else, the story changes again.

She was seventeen, he was eighteen. They had been a band for a year, been playing and writing and singing for a year. The time flew by, each day long and full and good. They were so, so good. They finally gave in to the chemistry, let themselves combine and combust.

Their first kiss was electric, the start of something new. Something new grew and twisted between them, green and young and alive.

They lasted for three years like that. For three years, everything was happy. For three years it felt like nothing could ever pull them down from the sky. They were young and they thought that they would be together forever.

She was twenty, he was twenty-one. He could tell that they were heading down the road of breaking. And he knew that she knew and that the band knew.

It was in the glances that used to be light and were now just dark. It was in the songs that used to be perfect harmonies and were now dissonance. It was in the shows that used to be played smoothly and now were peppered with mistakes. They gave each other so many signs.

The signs were what saved them in the end. The signs were what prevented the massive blowout, instead letting them down into a field of heartbreak gently. The signs let them leave each other silently, quiet tears and half-baked apologies.

My friends are making sure I don't see you

I strategize a path to the bathroom

So I don't walk past you

He knows that they put Alex and Reggie in an awkward spot. He knows that they are still friends with her, how could they not be, when she is who she is.

He sees the texts when he takes their phones for some silly reason, feels the pang in his heart when he sees Jules 💗.

It takes seven months until the two of them are in the same place at the same time. It's some awards show, where he can check out and people watch, not up for any trophies or shiny things.

It's all going well until he hears her name be called, sees her walk up onto the stage. It's the first time that he's seen her, really seen her. Whenever she comes up on the tv or his phone he always swipes away, hiding from it. He doesn't know what she's winning (he is a liar) and he doesn't care (liar, liar).

She looks stunning and it hurts because he knows that she isn't thinking about him as much as he is thinking about her. She talks and she smiles and she laughs on stage until he can't take it anymore.

He can't take it and he feels himself spiraling. He plots his way to the restroom, making sure he doesn't pass her or any of their old friends. He knows that the paparazzi are snapping photos of his face, of the way that he flees instead of confronting his emotions. He doesn't care, in the moment, what they get. They will get him, his raw version, not the polished PR perfect version. Good. Let the world see someone in pain.

He hides in the bathroom for the rest of the show, until he can't anymore, and then he leaves. They are screaming out his name, cameras blinding him as he rushes to his car. He ignores them all. He turns his phone off, makes the driver drive in silence, the only sounds his breathing. He almost breaks down there again, not the first time that he would've cried in a car. But he pulls it together, catching the eye of the driver in the mirror.

When he is at his apartment that still feels too big and too quiet, even all these months later, he has texts from Alex and Reggie. He responds and he catches the Daily Mail already reporting on his abrupt exit. They get everything wrong and he's not sure how much more of it he can bear.

You leave before the concert is finished

It takes a year before he is ready to perform again. If he knew that their last performance together was going to be their final goodbye on the stage, he wonders if he would have done it differently. He wonders and it eats at him but he pushes through. He swims through the acid to the other side.

It's not a proper concert, more of an opening act than the main show, but it's something. It's a step in the right direction. And she just happens to be there. He wasn't warned, he wasn't given a sign. He wanted one, so he could have prepared himself to look at her. When she looks so happy, her arm slung around Flynn.

And he knows that she doesn't know that he is here, because otherwise there would be sour lemon puckered lips on what is a sweet lemonade smile. He knows because otherwise, she wouldn't be here.

He only has a few songs, classic covers chosen by his PR team. It feels like they choose everything that he does now, they monitor his every move. He wants to be raw, to be honest. He is not a perfect man.

He gets up on stage. She isn't looking at him, still hasn't glanced his way. Flynn sees him, and she gives him a bittersweet smile.

He starts singing. It feels like him but not, the backing band roaring to life. It's so different from performing with Julie and the Phantoms, as he sees her recognize his voice and turn around. He sees her smile drop and he feels his heart break again. She watches him and he feels like his body is collapsing. But he keeps going, keeps singing, just like she did, just like they did right before the end.

There's one song left when he makes his decision. What comes out of his mouth is not the pop-punk song that his PR picked out for him. It’s a song that he listened to all those months ago, in the aftermath of the tragedy. He watches her face as the lyrics pour out of him, watches her leave before he is finished.

Because they can’t even be in the same room.

#luke #luke patterson #julie #julie molina #breakup fic #julie and the phantoms #fanfic #part one #jatp #flynn jatp #reggie jatp #alex jatp

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becausegoodbye · 3 years

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a few of my favourite albums of 2020

Jogging House - Be ... (plus Morimoto Naoki - Hibi) (plus Green-House - Six Songs for Invisible Gardens ...) (plus Denis Tremblay - SLEEP BETTER IN NOISY CLASSROOMS ...)

2020 was the year I got super into ambient music. There've always been albums I felt worked best nestled into the background, and Brian Eno's 'Ambient 1' has been a favourite for almost a decade, but this year the search took on a different energy. I approach ambient music with an extremely indulgent kind of simplicity — "Are these pretty sounds that make my ears feel good?" — and there's something really gratifying about setting yourself a question simple enough that you know you'll always be able to answer it. The ambient albums I loved this year I discovered almost entirely through Bandcamp, which is replete with so many tiny cassette labels that you can find ones that cater to every possible sub-calibration of ambient vibe (my personal favourites are Seil, Constellation Tatsu, Aural Canyon, Dauw, Global Patterns, and 梅レコード). It feels a little rude to combine several different albums into the same entry here, but for me, my unwillingness to analyse them is part of their strength. I just put them on and sink into my chair. They feel good the same way a fluffy dressing gown feels good against your skin, or a cat feels good pressing itself against your shin. This year, I decided that it didn't need to be any more complicated than that.

Dan Deacon - Mystic Familiar For a microfiction competition late last year, I wrote a short story about everyone in the world simultaneously deciding to lie down permanently and let the bugs eat us. The idea was to try and describe something intuitively repulsive to us (beetles licking your eyeballs, ants carrying off your flesh) in a way that made it feel meditative and beautiful. Then not even a week later, the video for ‘Sat By a Tree’ came out, which was about almost the exact same thing. This album doesn’t seem to have struck a chord with very many people, and I can get why: the vocals are still too shyly buried for lyrics people, and too nakedly earnest for folks who just want to bliss out. Even I can’t deny that I’d probably like this album more if the vocals were treated differently, or if it were reworked as a totally instrumental piece. But there’s a pursuit in all of Dan’s music that resonates with me on a subdermal level, and it’s carried through on this album beautifully. It’s the quest for density, for something maximal and full enough to approximate the teeming microscopic and macroscopic busyness of life. When I listen to Dan Deacon, I always think about microbes: about how each of us is a teeming metropolis more than a singular being. It’s the missing perspective that allows a person to see that being eaten by bugs isn’t so bad; it’s the most appropriate possible thing that could happen to us. (Emphasis on the ‘us’.)

Waxahatchee - Saint Cloud

Nobody needs me to tell them that Katie Crutchfield is a great songwriter. This is a classic album of heartbreak, of regret, of sobering up: a splint on an arm that’s still holding onto what it’s lost. The lyrics are pitched at this particular allegorical intensity – hells, landslides, scientific cryptograms – and the country-inflected indie-rock instrumentation largely has the sense to simply get out of the way. There’s a sympathetic wisdom to the songs here, focused less on the worst intensities of grief than on the life you figure out how to live afterwards. It’s an arm on your shoulder and an eye to the horizon.

“You might mourn all that you wasted That's just part of the haul Tangling up all your good fortune Bearing the heart of the fall You won't break it after all”

Dirty Projectors - 5EPs This is silly, incautious conjecture on my part, but Dave Longstreth feels like he's putting in the work of redemption. I was close to writing him off after the arch bitterness of 2017's self-titled record (a break-up album that was nauseatingly heavy on the arrogant self-righteousness), but 2018's Lamp Lit Prose did a lot to re-interest me. Its smile felt forced at times, but its melodies and rhythms were undeniable: reminders of why I was invested in this asshole in the first place. This year, Dirty Projectors put out five separate EPs, the first four each with different lead singers, then everyone coming together on the fifth. It feels as though Longstreth is making a conscious effort to bite his tongue, to clutch his micromanaging hand under the table, so that everyone else can have a chance to breathe and actually enjoy being in this band. The result is a collection of songs with a really pleasurable lightness: not the tortured and perfectionistic Artistic Statements that Longstreth's been prone to over the years, but a pigeon's glide, a coin's flash -- a less ponderous engagement with Longstreth's peculiar musical gravity. It's a lovely bunch of songs even without this projected-on story about Longstreth's personal growth, but try as I might, I can't not hear that story.

Phoebe Bridgers - Punisher

Ambient soothing aside, life's complications still exist, and Phoebe Bridgers is the queen of them. She's the only musician who seems like she thrived in quarantine, somehow cotton-candy-swirling all this loneliness and introspection and yearning and 'fuck it' into an album that feels miraculous and inexhaustible. Punisher is without doubt my favourite album of the year. It's anxious, funny, miserable, and sly. It's a dog-shaped helium balloon majestically floating into the stratosphere. I can't say enough good things about the production side of it, which maintains this perfect illuminated-manuscript balance of enhancing the text/song/scripture without ever overshadowing it. At the centre of it, though, is a songwriter who's figured out how to make every song its own entire world, keening and quaking in resonance with whatever you're going through. This has been a shit sad year, and it’s been a lot better facing that with this album than without it. No question, Phoebe was the year’s MVP.

#these get harder to do every year #but I always regret it if I don't at least write *something* I can go back to later #there are a lot of other albums I've really liked this year but I'm not sure I really have much cogent to say about them #things are really shit right now #but music #...#music's still really good

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popmusicu · 3 years

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Music Recommendation: Mitski

Today I want to recommend an artist who I think does not have the recognition she deserves: Mitski Miyawaki. She is a Japanese-American indie musician and has been active since 2012, serving as the opening act for bands and musicians such as Pixies and Lorde.

Mitski's music recalls something of the 90s vibe, very powerful and emo, as if it framed us in an eternal adolescence, but in a more intimate and mature way, while reinventing his musical proposals.

Her first studio album Lush, transits between lo-fi, folktronics and chamber pop. This album was Mitski's debut, although it was released while he was still studying at college. This work was recognized mainly for its poetry-laden lyrics. From this album I recommend Eric, a song full of seduction and eroticism, but at the same time loaded with a very sinister atmosphere.

Eric: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kRPI6JSCOK0

Her second work, Retired from Sad, New Career in Business, was also done while she was still in college, serving as her degree project.

This album is more experimental, and mixes a student orchestra with electric sounds and not so conventional elements. The album features a music video for each of its 9 songs, with an intertwined story forming a kind of movie. While the videos are quite “amateur” and student-level, it is interesting to see the evolution between this and his previous album, noting a great exploration not only in music but also in Mitski's writing. From this album I recommend Goodbye, My Danish Sweetheart.

Goodbye, My Danish Sweetheart: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ohxu-pA7o64

Her third studio album, and my favorite, is Bury Me At Makeout Creek. It is named after the phrase that Milhouse, from The Simpsons, says after being run over by a truck. This album is perhaps the most "conventional" in his career, but at the same time one of the best, surprising with indie-rock and punk-rock full of energy, guitars and basses with dirty sounds and lyrics full of fury, love and frustration. With this album Mitski begins to gain more notoriety within the industry, being recognized mainly for the lyrics of her songs (For this album Mitski wrote all the songs completely alone).

From this album I recommend First Love / Late Spring. Starting as a complete harmony, it evolves with distorted and aggressive electric sounds and guitars, with lyrics that could be cloying at first, but ends up being completely heartbreaking, like a last love poem.

First Love / Late Spring.: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WCphVz0ZGns

I also recommend Francis Forever, my favorite Mitski song. With a fairly simple structure, the bass line guides Mitski's voice that becomes more and more energetic, who seems to make a statement not so much for someone, but for herself: “I don´t need the world to see, that I've been the best I can be ”.

Francis Forever: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UMJm_97QXHA

His fourth album Puberty 2 continues with a formula similar to the previous one, exploring indie-rock and punk-rock again. Again she receives the favor of the critic, and her great emotional capacity to write poetic and profound lyrics on topics as diverse as depression, alienation, anxiety and also racial identity is highlighted. This album has a much more hopeful and cheerful sound despite the themes that its lyrics deal with, because it also tries to reflect the internal conflicts about how to overcome oneself and be at peace with oneself, despite all the obstacles that we may encounter.

From this album I recommend Thursday Girl. It is a song with an extremely simple structure, but through repetition and as if it were a prayer, along with the harmony between an electric guitar and synthesizer sounds, Mitski manages to engross the listener and immerse her in a state of reflection.

Thursday Girl: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LpH31xY6Mx4

Finally, in 2018 she releases her latest studio album (so far) titled Be The Cowboy. In this album she incorporates elements from all her past works, returning to her songs the more orchestral sounds and pianos, but maintaining her already emblematic distorted electric guitar. In addition, it includes elements of art-pop, funk, disco, synth pop, country rock, euro disco, among others. It is a much more conceptual album compared to the previous one that was extremely personal, and manages to impose itself as Mitski's most successful to date, positioning itself on the charts of the best albums of that year, reaching No. 11 in Billboard’s Top 50, No. 14 in the New York Times Top 50 and No. 2 in Rolling Stone's Top 28.

From this album I recommend Nobody. With a disco style, Mitski tells us about loneliness and love, but with a melody that inevitably keeps us from being depressed, and motivates us to think about our relationships with others.

Nobody: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qooWnw5rEcI

“Venus, planet of love,

was destroyed by global warming.

Did its people want too much too?”

I look forward to her new album, and I also recommend for those who do not know her to give it a try, as she really is a talented artist who still has a lot to offer.

-Rodrigo Silva

#Music Video #Albums #I love this #submission

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berniedette · 4 years

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Walls by Louis Tomlinson First Listen Album Reaction

Alright, I have my good earphones plugged in and I will be listening to the whole album in order, no skipping. Let the Brit come and invade my ears and mind. Here we go...

Track 1: Kill My Mind

I’ve heard this before. Upbeat. Devil in my brain. Ease the pain. I really love the bridge to this. The energy. Yessssssss

Track 2: Don’t Let It Break Your Heart

I’ve heard this before. This is the track version now. Little bit longer intro than the single version. I love the lyrics to this a lot. It’s already helped me in my personal life. It’s just so so nice and comforting and reassuring, but it never crosses the line to cheesy. I think it’s cuz it’s sincere. It’s saying yeah it fuckin hurts and you feel like it’s killing you… but DON’T. LET. IT. Also, the guitar towards the end is just magnificent.

Track 3: Two Of Us

I’ve heard this before. The keyboard on this song is absolutely killing me. The swells in this song is just heartbreaking. The chorus is just so passionate. One Life For The Two Of Us. It’s sad, yet hopeful. OH MY GOD the outro. That might be my favorite part. It makes me want to give him a hug, not because I think he needs it but I think he just deserves it for being so strong.

Track 4: We Made It

I’ve heard this before, but it’s hitting me so hard right now. The melody of this song is something special. The big pop chorus swells aren’t there, and without it, the song just has a flow and a tempo and a rhythm that kinda says, “yeah, we made it,” We’re here. We’re not stopping. We’ll keep going. We’re “never coming down.” SO. WHAT. The almost spoken-word style of this song just makes one need to listen to the lyrics all that intently. It’s a statement. Some of the verses talk about a relationship with somebody, yet the chorus and feel of the whole song makes me think that he’s just talking about himself. He could also be talking to his fans, but I like my idea that he’s talking about himself. Maybe to the person in the mirror, idk. And the quip about the “singing something poppy in the same 4 chords” lyric is hilarious when compared to the style of pop of this song. I really like this song. Favorite so far.

Track 5: Too Young

Oh wow okay. Echos. This style seems so familiar to me, like a songwriter or a producer I’m familiar with made this. I don’t know what I feel about this song. I’m not getting sadness, it seems like it’s just so matter of fact. And that’s weird cuz Louis’ voice normally (and so far in this album) have been so expressive and emotional. This is weird. It might be how much echo there is…. this is weird. His voice kinda sounds distorted, like it’s been edited to sound even more soft and tender. Creeps me out a little, like listening to asmr. Maybe it’ll be better if I didn’t have earphones in.

Track 6: Walls

The title track of this album. This was released a few days or weeks ago. I might have listened to it once, but I haven’t even watched the music video yet. This vocal is so much better than the last one. “Nothing wakes you up like walking up alone.” I hear that. That’s happened to me once or twice lol. There are a LOT of instruments in this already, and I haven’t even gotten to the first chorus yet. I like the vocals in the chorus actually. Up and down, and up and down. Okay, I’m sorry did this man just rhyme lost and because???? I love that! That’s a quote right there. I really like the melody of this chorus. Oh wow. End with the opening line. Okay, Mr. Tomlinson, I see you.

Track 7: Habit

He really likes the combo of acoustic and electric guitars huh? OH MY GOD excuse me mister baritone wtfffffffff. Where did that come from??? LEMME START OVER. THAT THREW ME OFF lmfaooo. Aw, this is so sad. Aw, he misses crack cocaine. KIDDING!!! I like this song. Yeah, compare that person to a drug. I love that. I love this song, wow. “I was better with you”? Oh honey nooooo. Awww, I usually love bridges and Louis writes really good ones, but the lyrics in this song’s bridge is not okay with me. :( This is a fantastic song tho. Second favorite so far.

Track 8: Always You

Damn okay. Uptempo it after my heart just broke with the last one. I like the opening chords. OH WAIT, are these even chords? Whoah hold up. It went SUPER POP rn. Sounds kinda dance-y. Is there gonna be a bass drop in this song? I’m calling it now lol. What the fuck?? Bro. Wtf. This is SO POP I cannot even. I can’t focus on the lyrics cuz my head in is spinning. Is there a fuckin feature on this???? What the fuck is this. Okay, it’s over. What. The. Fuck. Was. That. Why the fuck was that song in this album??????? That’s so weird. Who let that happen??????? It’s so out of place!! I can’t. I have to move on.

Track 9: Fearless

Are those sounds of children? Ew. Wait a sec, is that shade? OMG These lyrics are soooooo shady. Yesssss I love this sound for him!!! It’s anger. YESSS. YELL BABY!! Claps. Who is this song for??? Who is the umbrella under?? Who are we shading, honey? I NEED TO KNOW omg. “Tell me do you still remember feeling young” YES BABY ROAST THEM. This is fuckin hilarious and this just knocked down Habit as my 2nd fave.

Track 10: Perfect Now

Strumming an acoustic. Awww, the lyrics of this song is so sweet. This would be a great song for him to sing by himself on stage in concert, him playing the guitar. That would be so sweet. I know there’s some violins, but the song don’t need that live. “I guess some queens don’t need a crown” It’s true hun, but it’s obviously the perfect accessory. “You make me feel like being someone” is such a fantastic line.

Track 11: Defenceless

Ugh, the British spelling, I guess lol. Okay lyrics, you’re strong. Okay kickdrum, you’re working overtime. I really like this. Nice drums on this one too. It felt kinda busy at first, but it works. “By YooOoUuUu.” I feel like I’m getting attacked. And I’m fucking defenseless (that’s not the British spelling lol).

Track 12: Only The Brave

The title sounds like an army thing lol. Okay, is this the 60s? I like the sound actually, it’s pretty cool. Retro. Wait, it’s over already?!?! I gotta listen again wtf. I didn’t even understand a word. I just heard that he went up to head voice thrice. Okay, again. “I’m breaking all my rules, I’m crying like a fool.” Wow. I get the sound now. I appreciate this a lot. I gotta read these lyrics. Seems to me he sang “it’s a solo song and it’s only for the brave” which wow. Amazing end of album line.

Final thoughts:

Louis Tomlinson is a very talented singer and songwriter. He has his sound and he’s not floundering about. This album proves it. I’m not mad at it at all. I liked almost every single song at first listen and I’m sure the only one I have a problem with will grow on me. I thought ending on Only the Brave was absolutely perfect. It is a very strong song to end on. Lastly, if you’d excuse the lame metaphor, this debut album is a strong wall which he can build more onto (with tours and more singles and more albums) so that in no time, he’d have a very tall building that can touch the sky.

My Top 3

3. Habit

2. Fearless

1. We Made It

Special Recognition to Only The Brave for being hauntingly raw and honest

#walls #walls by louis tomlinson #louis tomlinson #music reviews #album reviews #I'm gonna listen to Only The Brave on repeat

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amoveablejake · 4 years

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Album Of The Week: ‘In The Wee Small Hours’ by Frank Sinatra

Stand out song: In the wee small hours

Frank Sinatra cursed himself by having quite a few iconic songs. Tracks like ‘My Way’ and ‘That’s Life’ didn’t do Ol’ Blue Eyes any favours. Now, let’s clarify that statement. That is not an attack on Sinatra’s best known songs, they are iconic for a reason and do deserve their place as being great songs. Songs that helped to make his career. But they are far from being his best work. No, Frank’s best work came in the form of a concept album released in 1955 that showed the world that Frank Sinatra was not just a hit singer but could create an album that is truly a masterpiece. It is an incredibly intimate and personal look at an artist the world thought they knew.

Easily in my top ten favourite albums of all time, ‘In The Wee Small Hours’ remains enchanting every time I listen to it and infact always brings something new to the table that I hadn’t noticed before. From the outset with the title track Sinatra establishes a tone for the record, it is heartbreak and that is why I love it so. His work is often so full of life, and so full of love and this album, it’s full of those same exact things but in a very different way. This isn’t singing in Vegas and being a movie star with Dean Martin. No, this is being Frank Sinatra, not the icon but rather the man, alone in bed in the dead of night thinking of what he’s lost. It is at times a painful album, you can hear his voice falter, it’s luxuriously smooth treble dipping with a small break in the armour. It’s a vulnerable album that bears all and in doing so brings its listeners in to a degree that a lot of albums fail to do. I think to listen to ‘In The Wee Small Hours’ and to not draw something out of it, that might just be impossible.

As I mentioned up top, Frank cursed himself with ‘My Way.’ When he passed away it played everywhere, you can’t find a compilation of his greatest hits without it being one of the final songs. And that’s fine. But also, it’s not. Because by having ‘My Way’ being THE Frank song it disregards this album. And I’m not saying this album is the real Frank, I won’t even pretend to know who that was but this album is his most personal and I think the one that will stand the test of time. If it was up to me and I had to choose one song to memorialise Frank from this album, it would be ‘I Get Along Without You Very Well’. Although ‘In The Wee Small Hours’ is my favourite song and holds a very dear place in my heart, I get along feels like the song that should accompany Sinatra’s memory. We can move on without him, but hearing his voice, brings back all those memories associated with it. I get along is fundamentally about living a life without someone but finding them in everything you do. In a lot of ways, Frank Sinatra is one of those artists for me, I can remember listening to him for as long as I can recall and above all I remember finding ‘In The Wee Small Hours’ and feeling that I was coming home. As I’ve said time and time again it is a sad album, but you know what, I’m glad to be unhappy.

- Jake, a man who is starting to pride himself a little too much on working a song title into the sign offs for these pieces, 07/09/2020

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nerds4life · 4 years

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2 winners and 3 losers from One Direction’s solo albums

The boys have all gone in different … directions … since their indefinite hiatus in 2016. Some are better than others.

By Alexa Lee (Jan 31, 2020, 9:00am EST)

A decade — yes, a decade — ago, a teenage boy band by the name of One Direction was formed. After auditioning as individual singers on the British musical competition The X Factor, Niall Horan, Liam Payne, Harry Styles, Louis Tomlinson, and Zayn Malik were thrown together into a group by TV personality Simon Cowell in 2010. And thus, One Direction was born.

While the group only placed third on The X Factor, their time on the reality show was just the beginning of their global takeover. Over a span of five years, the group released five albums, did four world tours, broke numerous Billboard 100 music records (including ones previously only held by the Beatles), recorded a documentary, and even released a perfume.

At the same time, the five members also became the basis of adolescent crushes and fervor for many years to come. Thanks to their individual quirks and calculated branding ploys, each boy quickly became an archetype for a different high school crush: Niall was the adorable friend, Harry the artistic boy next door. Zayn was quietly mysterious, while Liam was extroverted and jockish. And Louis? Hmm, well — Louis was also there.

For those five years, the One Direction boys seemed like they were untouchable. That is, until Zayn left the group in 2015 to embark on a solo career, and, a year later, the remaining band members announced an “indefinite hiatus.”

Four years after One Direction announced its hiatus, each of the One Direction-ers have begun their own solo careers. It’s the first time any of them have recorded without each other, and the first time they’ve performed solo in front of an audience since being on The X Factor as teens. Their solo albums, good or bad, reveal how each individual wants to reintroduce themselves to the public, and how they’re attempting the complicated leap from adolescent pop star to independent adult artist.

Now that Louis Tomlinson has dropped his first solo album, every former One Direction member has released at least one solo project. (Harry and Zayn have each released two.) And there are some very clear winners and losers among them. Here’s how they stack up against each other and what each one tells us about who these boys are now that they’ve spent some time apart.

Winner: Fine Line by Harry Styles

Watching Harry emerge triumphantly, hair and culottes billowing, with the title of Most Popular and Critically Acclaimed Ex-One Direction Member is not unlike watching a long-awaited prophecy finally fall into place. Ever since One Direction first stepped into the international limelight, interviews and press circuits saw that Harry was different from his fellow bandmates. He was offbeat but cool, disheveled but sexy.

And in 2017, when he released his debut album named — what else? — Harry Styles, Harry established himself as worthy of all the hype from his years in the band. A brooding rock record filled with anecdotes about all the sex he has and heartbreak he’s felt, Harry Styles reintroduced Harry to the world as an indie songwriter, David Bowie fanboy, and charismatic lover. And with his next, more experimental 2019 album, Harry takes all these elements of his identity a step further, securing his spot in the popular music landscape as a modern rock star.

Harry released Fine Line at the end of last year, interrupting winter’s dreariness with bright, dancey songs about all-consuming yearning. The lyrics of “Adore You” and “Watermelon Sugar” conjure images of summer fruits and summer loves, and both songs set the perfect soundtrack for encountering a crush at a party, or at least fending off seasonal depression. And on “Cherry,” his transportive and melancholy ode to an ex, listeners get a glimpse at genuine heartache from Harry. Despite having built a career out of belting love songs, Harry has never before sounded this vulnerable in his music before. “Cherry” shines a light on the vulnerabilities of a seemingly invulnerable star and brings a touching depth to Harry’s music that was previously absent. Fine Line is the most adventurous and enjoyable of the One Direction members’ solo efforts, and it’s sure to convert even the most crotchety boy band skeptics into believers.

Winner: Flicker by Niall Horan

As a member of One Direction, Niall was beloved — but not for being the band’s breakout star or its scene-stealing performer or even its biggest personality. Niall’s greatest charm, and the primary allure of his 2017 album Flicker, is instead seeming like an ordinary, likable guy. The human embodiment of a chill night in, Niall projects affable, regular-guy energy, but in a more palatable way than, say, Ed Sheeran. He’s a man who, after being part of the most popular boy band this side of the millennia, can still convincingly seem like he’s bemused by his fame and wealth. Niall likes Nando’s, and he likes to golf on the weekends. It’s easy to imagine him as one of those people with the uncanny ability to put horses at ease simply by murmuring the dulcet opening bars of his hit single “This Town” and running his guitar-worn hands over their hides.

Niall brings this same aura of safety and coziness to Flicker, where he strums his acoustic guitar and sings earnestly about the mundane highs and lows of falling in love. His songs are emotionally and musically safe — the most upbeat tracks, “On the Loose” and “Slow Hands,” still retain a mellow, unhurried cadence, and sad songs like “Paper Houses” veer away from raw grief or anguish, opting instead for lyrics that just barely skim the surface of sorrow.

Is it always good when an artist’s best quality is being inoffensive and never taking risks? No, but perhaps in the swirling political and social chaos of 2020, it’s what we need. Niall is a calming lighthouse in the stormy sea of life, and we would be fools to let him out of our sight.

Loser: Icarus Falls by Zayn Malik

Writer Allison P. Davis once described Zayn as someone who “sings about sex like it’s this thing he just heard about on a Jodeci song.” It’s this image of Zayn that echoes in my mind whenever I think about his couple’s photoshoot with model Gigi Hadid, or the boyish pirate-themed pub in his backyard, or his many, many selfies featuring a tortured grimace and 5 o’clock shadow. Despite his reputation for being the quiet, mysterious band member, in his post-One Direction career, Zayn has revealed both his passion for sensual R&B, as well as a powerful lack of convincing sexual energy.

Davis’s one-sentence character study is also a devastatingly apt summary of Zayn’s second album, which came out in 2018. At nearly an hour and a half, Icarus Falls is a boring, corny exploration of what happens when a too-handsome man ensconces himself in cologne and longing. Chock full of weak lyrics (e.g. “That’s how I feel the soul inside her body”) and dull, forgettable beats, the album has neither the playfulness nor sufficient melancholy to breathe life into Zayn’s sensual aspirations, and the end result is unrewarding.

The disappointment of Icarus Falls is worsened by the fact that Zayn’s debut album, Mind of Mine, was so much better. Mind of Mine’s intriguing blasé attitude was an exciting change of pace from Zayn’s demeanor in One Direction, when he was obligated to sing very un-blasé songs like “What Makes You Beautiful.” Although the 2016 record also frequently stumbled when it intended to seduce, it showed signs of artistic promise that make Icarus Falls seem like dull anticlimax, with a mere two exceptions. “Let Me” and “Entertainer” are soothing tracks in which Zayn vows to shower his lover in devotion and luxury items, and they’re the only songs that come close to the groovy fun of his last album. For listeners who are unable to let go of Zayn’s undeniable vocal chops and moody flair (me), these quality songs are exasperating reminders that Zayn is wasting his potential as well as everyone else’s time.

Loser: LP1 by Liam Payne

For many years, Liam seemed poised to stay in the “normal guy” lane with Niall, often playing the band’s cheerful jokester in music videos and interviews. Because of his jovial stage presence and photogenic, symmetrical face, many people — Liam included — thought he would follow the footsteps of another boy band pop mogul, Justin Timberlake. Recently, however, Liam’s public personality has begun to curdle slightly, in the form of controversial Instagram posts about his personal wealth, dating and impregnating the judge at his X Factor audition, and regrettable jewelry he calls the “Payne Chain.” Today, Liam seems less like a new Timberlake and more like a second-rate Bieber.

Liam’s debut album LP1, released in December 2019, follows a similarly cringy trajectory. Boosted by Chainsmoker-esque beats and sleazy lines about “[doing] your ass in the car,” Liam’s music is a bold statement separating himself from the sound of One Direction, but it’s not for the better. At one particularly low point, he leers at and fetishizes his partner’s bisexuality in the song “Both Ways.” But even on tracks without pointedly offensive lyrics, Liam’s bravado comes off as corny, and he fails to utilize his sonorous voice’s full strength. Each song on LP1 sounds like a mishmash assembly of smash hit ingredients, but the final product can’t quite stick the landing, and songs blur together in a haze of tropical synth and repetitive melody.

It’s not all bad, though. Tasteless songs aside, it’s hard not to listen to LP1 without admiring Liam’s unwavering audacity. Not everyone has the bulwark of confidence required to sing lyrics like, “I just wanna have fun and get rowdy / One Coke and Bacardi, sipping lightly,” or release a song called “Hips Don’t Lie” that’s neither a Shakira cover nor good. While this album is not the radio-ready bop collection that Liam was perhaps hoping it would be, LP1 is, above all else, unapologetic about what it is.

Loser: Walls by Louis Tomlinson

In a recent interview with the Guardian, Louis says, “[Niall’s] the most lovely guy in the world … Zayn has a fantastic voice … Harry comes across very cool. Liam’s all about getting the crowd going, doing a bit of dancing … And then there’s me.”

Louis’s self-deprecating remarks reflect the popular perception of him as the forgettable, “other” member of One Direction. Sadly, his same failure to assert himself as a unique public figure and musician is the downfall of his album Walls, which struggles to sound memorable despite being the solo album that most closely resembles One Direction’s former sound.

Louis is the last member of One Direction to release a solo album, largely because he put off recording music for an extended amount of time after the death of his mother and sister in 2016 and 2019, respectively. Given this context, it’s not surprising that Louis’s music is steeped in solemnity, whether he’s nostalgic for an old relationship on “Too Young,” or openly grieving the loss of his family on “Two of Us.”

Unfortunately, Walls feels like a confessional series of diary entries set to drums and tinny acoustic guitar, and while the frank intimacy is a refreshing contrast to, say, Liam, ultimately the album feels lackluster and sonically generic. Soft guitar and even softer vocals accompany lyrics about longing — for someone, a feeling, a moment in the past — making Walls feel like a pale imitation of One Direction’s booming rock-inspired pop rather than an entity of its own. In his first attempt to separate himself musically from the group, Louis once again blends into the background.

Not everyone is better off alone [insert pun about One Direction becoming Many Directions].

The transition from boy band member to adult man solo artist is not an easy one. The scramble to assert oneself as a legitimate, relevant musician can be full of pressure, and not everyone walks away with equal amounts of fame and success. In the case of One Direction, the majority of these underwhelming solo efforts suggest that, as much as the members have striven to express their individuality, their biggest legacy will probably be being part of a group. (Unless we’re talking about Harry Styles, that is.)

#mine #ot5 #ride or die together #and discuss #ot5 reunion

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durazno-dulce · 5 years

Text

All I Want

A/N: This is kinda bad?? My first time posting writing on here, this follows the song All I Want by Kodaline. Sorry if it’s terrible.

Word Count: 1.5k+

(Part 2)

(Masterlist)

All I want is nothing more

To hear you knocking at my door

(Y/N) sat on her couch in an empty house wrapped in a blanket staring off into the void, her mind lost in thought. Her thoughts lingered to the night she had last seen Roger.

“I love you, I promise I do.” He said pleading with her, his eyes puffy with tears streaming down.

“You may love me,” she said voice quivering and stifling her cries,”but you’re not in love with me and it’s okay, I understand but I can’t hold onto somebody whose found that in somebody else.”

“Please don’t do this, it’s not like that.” He protested as though he were trying to make himself believe the words that were coming out of his mouth.

“I will always love you, but it time to let go of this, it’s not fair to hold onto me when I’m preventing you from being with someone you truly love.” She sobbed, her voice was somber but firm on her decision. Roger opened his mouth to say something but his mind was trying to process everything not allowing him to get any words out. (Y/N) picked up her bags and walked to the door.

“I wish-“ she started before a lump in her throat stopped her from continuing.

She let out a sob before continuing. “I wish it were different, I wish you could’ve found love in me, but I know you can’t control that.” She blurted out before breaking down.

That had been weeks ago, the sting of heartbreak seemed endless and her thoughts added salt to the wound. She gazed at the door longing for the sound of a knock. (Y/N) longed to see the beautifully disheveled hair and serene blue eyes staring back at her with an embrace as though nothing had happened. Instead she was only met with a deafening silence, only the soft crackling of the fireplace and soft pattering of rain could be heard making her feel more alone then before.

'Cause if I could see your face once more

I could die as a happy man I'm sure

Roger sat at the dining table of his flat, messy hair and dried tears lingered on the features of his face. His breakfast now seemingly unappetizing as he messed with the piece of toast in his hand. He got up from his table and threw it in the bin before walking into the living room void of (Y/N)’s personable items leaving it bare of any reminders of her.

Some of Audrey’s things lingered in his flat, she was the girl that he fell for, it was a small innocent crush that escalated. (Y/N) caught on and was quick to end things with Roger when she found out about the nature of their relationship, but he knew the connection with Audrey was nothing that compared to the one with (Y/N).

While Roger searches for a drumstick he had lost days prior he found a photo album, one that (Y/N) had made him for prior to the American tour so he could see her everyday and they both made sure to fill the book with everything they did. He opened up the album looking at each picture (Y/N)’s loving gaze as he laughed at something idiotic or more intimate moments where they each took time taking candid photos of one another.

His heart fluttered at each picture, before remembering his current state. His heart ached to see her, a picture couldn’t do justice to the beauty that his heart fell for the first time he saw her.

When you said your last goodbye

I died a little bit inside

(Y/N) regained her composure as she fiddled with the ring on her finger. Her chest felt tight as she struggled on each breath, her crying feeling endless. Her heart broke as she slipped the ring off her finger watching Rogers face fall, emotions getting to the best of him. He turned away, he couldn’t bare to watch his promise of a future being broken in a second.

She placed the ring on the small table by the door, she once again grabbed her things. She walked up to him looking flustered, but he still saw her beauty beyond the mess. She gave him one last kiss on the cheek before opening the door.

“I love you.” She said giving him one last sad smile before closing the door behind her and walking out of Rogers life.

I lay in tears in bed all night

Alone without you by my side

(Y/N) finally got up from her spot on the couch and walked into the restroom, she looked at herself in the mirror as she looked in disgust. Her lack of self care was starting to show after the past couple of weeks. She slipped into the shower taking some extra time to lather her body and clean herself up. Upon exiting the shower she felt more refreshed, her eyes less puffy and skin less dull. She slipped into an old T-shirt and some underwear before walking to her room and sat on the edge of her bed looking at the empty spot next to her.

She slipped under the covers turning off her light and turning on her side to observe the side of her that held Rogers body but now void of anything. The moonlight just slightly cascaded in through the window illuminating and emphasizing the void that haunted the space beside her. She lost sleep every night with a mind that refused to let go and imagining what life would have been like had things turned out differently.

She couldn’t help but pass the thought that maybe, just maybe, he was thinking of her too.

But If you loved me

Why did you leave me

Not a day went by that Roger didn’t think of (Y/N), he knew that her leaving was his fault but he couldn’t help but think that she would burst through those doors with a boisterous laugh and a story of how her day at work was.

He could still remember her voice so clearly as though you were still in the room with him. Roger wished she’d never let him go, he wished he’d fought harder to keep her, but he knew that it was not fair to blame her for his own issues.

Roger eventually walked to the kitchen and looked at the phone, his mind was deep in thought before he dialed a number.

Cause you brought out the best of me

A part of me I'd never seen

You took my soul wiped it clean

Our love was made for movie screens

“Roger!” (Y/N) yelled as she ran into Rogers arms following her arrival into the studio.

“Hello love.” Roger said smiling back at her giving her a peck on the top of your head as the other boys laughed at the two of you.Roger let go as you walked over to Freddie giving him a nudge on the shoulder before being pulled into a hug.

“How are you darling?” He said pulling up your hand emphasizing the new ring on your finger.“I’ve never been better Fred.” She said softly with nothing but happiness behind her statement

“You’re the only girl I’d ever seen that brought out the best in Roger, I’m so happy he found you (Y/N).” Freddie said with a smile as the rest of the boys caught on giving you each a congrats and hug.

To find somebody

I'll find somebody

The phone rang and rang, finally Brian answered.

“What are you doing tonight?” He asked with the intent to block out anything in his mind.

(Y/N) had finally gotten the courage to call Freddie on the phone after several weeks, he answered almost immediately.

“Love I’ve been waiting for this call, I knew you needed your time.” He said, you could hear the empathetic tone in his voice.

“May I ask? Roger has refused to tell me anything.” He murmured almost fearful of the result. She knew what he was hinting at, you hadn’t told anyone as to why you and roger called it quits and obviously he had the same idea.

You gave a small painful laugh, “One day, I was the love of his life, the next I wasn’t. Crazy how quickly feelings can change, but you can do nothing but accept what comes at you.” You said sadness in your voice.

“Come out with me tonight, you need some fun,” Freddie said a soft tone in his voice. “I promise you won’t regret it.”

Roger sat at the bar ordering a pint, as Brian excused himself to talk to someone in the pub when he feels a presence next to him.

He turns to see the long hair he could recognize in an instant and a lovely dress he’d never thought he’d see again. A sad smile appeared on the girls lips.

“It’s nice to see you stranger.”

#bohemian rhapsody #bohemian rhapsody fanfic #roger taylor x reader #roger taylor imagine #roger taylor fanfic #angst #ben hardy #queen #queen imagines #fanfic #ben hardy imagine #duraznofics

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930club · 5 years

Audio

ALBUM REVIEW: AJR – Neotheater

In the opening track to AJR’s Neotheater, lead singer Jack Met sings about the band’s fear of reaching their peak and wanting to stay “…next up forever.” While that may be an honest anxiety for artists to have in today’s music world, AJR has nothing to fear. Fresh off of the success of their second studio record, The Click (2017), AJR (comprised of Adam, Jack, and Ryan Met) seemed to reach their peak creating one of the best alt pop records ever. But with Neotheater, the band surpassed all expectations in the best way possible. Neotheater took a different direction from all their previous works, diving into the minds of all three brothers and commenting on things happening in the world today. As said in a recent Instagram post made by the band, “To anyone who writes to us saying stuff like ‘stick to music, stay out of politics…’ we write our truth.” I believe that statement sums up the beauty of their newest album.

Neotheater takes a personal approach when it comes to lyrics, discussing screw-ups members of the band had in the past and the uncertainty of growing up. Their previous two albums had more upbeat party songs like “Weak,” which was an anthem about owning your insecurities and not caring about what others think. Neotheater feels like a theatrical production, with an intro track full of soaring violins and hard-hitting drums, and a finale that sounds like the perfect end to a Broadway show. Throughout the entire 44 minutes, listeners are shown that everyone has their own problems and no matter how big or how small, they affect every individual differently. While this entire album is brilliant from start to end, I want to focus on three songs specifically: “Don’t Throw Out My Legos,” “The Entertainment’s Here,” and “Dear Winter.” I previously wrote reviews on the album’s two lead singles “100 Bad Days” and “Birthday Party” that you can check out here.

“Don’t Throw Out My Legos” is the fourth track on the album and talks about something that really hit home with me and most likely with all college students listening. The song tackles the feeling of moving out of your childhood home and facing the world on your own for the first time. While most move out songs have lyrics centered around saying goodbye to friends and family, AJR talks about Legos. Specifically, Jack sings about their parents throwing out their Legos after they moved, symbolizing that they are not children anymore. To further capture that feeling, the song is full of glitched samples in the beginning, making the verses feel overwhelming and happy. But once the chorus comes around, the song shrinks down to just two voices in harmony and a piano. It’s a powerful moment and made even more emotional with the lyric “Can we keep my Legos at home? / Cause I wanna move out / I don’t wanna move on.”

The second song, “The Entertainment’s Here,” is almost an ode to the modern-day band. It acts as a nice emotional palate cleanser after a couple more personable and sad songs. The song is full of high hats and snares with a chorus of trumpets and miscellaneous sounds helping to fill the space. The pre-chorus has a brilliant moment where Jack sings, “I’ve been thinking / That too much thinking / Can probably get me down.” These lyrics capture the feeling of slowly sinking into sadness but snapping back to reality, which is how the chorus quickly changes the mood from that moment in the song. It’s one of my favorite parts about the band: their ability to sneak in clever wordplay and lyrical moments that can almost go unnoticed at first listen but offer a new look to the song.

The last song I want to touch on is the third single from the record, “Dear Winter.” The song is about Ryan Met’s future child sung by Jack. The song also takes the form of a letter, with Jack introducing each verse (letter) with “Dear Winter.” It’s a heartbreaking song about all the amazing things that Winter will experience when she is born and as she grows up, but the feeling that sometimes Jack won’t get to be there for her or grow up with her. The song further captures this emotion with it being the only acoustic guitar song on the record. With just Jack and his guitar, the song tugs on all the heart strings in all the right ways.

Neotheater is a beautiful work of art full of personal lyrics, outrageous orchestrations, and relatable themes. Since all three brothers still attend Columbia College when they are on break, hearing these words and songs sung by people in this age range adds to the experience of the album, giving you a glimpse of what’s to come, what is happening now, or a deeper look into the past. Another bonus is the fact that a lot of songs have Easter eggs referencing other songs on the album. So, go ahead and give Neotheater a couple listens — I promise you will not regret it.

- Jacob Tracey

#Album Review #New Music #New Album #AJR #Neotheater #Jack Met #Ryan Met #Adam Met #Weak #Don't Throw Out My Legos #The Entertainment's Here #Dear Winter #100 Bad Days #Birthday Party #Jacob Tracey

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thesinglesjukebox · 4 years

Video

youtube

SELENA GOMEZ - LOSE YOU TO LOVE ME

[6.17]

We like it like a lose song, maybe...

Alex Clifton: I'm fascinated by songs where singers air their grievances and fans all know which specific people they are calling out. It's one of the reasons I fell in love with Taylor Swift's music way back in the day; I love a good gossip. Over the past eight years, I've worried about Selena with relation to Justin Bieber constantly. Not my relationship, I know, but he seemed like an immature asswipe when Selena could do much better. She's avoided discussing Bieber in much of her previous music. Even the songs that were definitely about him ("Love Will Remember," "The Heart Wants What It Wants") were written in abstract terms so you'd only really know the subject if you spent time following the Selena/Justin drama. Cut to "Lose You to Love Me," where she goes for the kill: "in two months you replaced us," a clear reference to Justin suddenly moving onto his now-wife Hailey. Such a vulnerable and specific track is a strong statement from Selena, who in the past two years has stayed relatively out of the public eye and is now ready to share parts of her story. There's no red scarf here, not that level of minutiae, but frankly she doesn't need it when much of her toxic and turbulent relationship with Bieber played out in the tabloids. And god it's so cathartic. It's an acknowledgement of hurt and anger but a phoenix move for Selena; she's rising from the debris stronger than before, and she wants you to know it. I'm so pleased for her. In the immortal words of her friend Taylor, "she lost him but she found herself and somehow that was everything." [8]

Wayne Weizhen Zhang: A decade into her career as one of the world's most popular artists, it's worth noting that Selena Gomez's ascent to fame was improbable. She didn't have the most powerful voice, dance skills, or even a number one hit -- but especially early in her career, she was able to leverage her very public personal life to fuel interest in her music: a Disney fan base, a feud with Demi Lovato which the media loved to cover, membership in Taylor Swift's entourage, and, of course, most significantly, an infamous on-and-off-again relationship. But over the past four years, Selena has developed an effective signature vocal style -- hushed, controlled whispers which burst into moments of pop brilliance -- which makes it clear that her music is more than capable of standing on her own. So it's all the more frustrating then, that after seeing how stellar her music can be removed from celebrity context, that the first song we get off her long awaited third solo album is yet another song about Justin Bieber. But while I initially rejected "Lose You to Love Me" as a regression into formulaic pop balladry, there's a surprising amount of depth. The song sounds like genuine healing, coming from an artist singing her truth. Her voice is soft but powerful, emotive but not overwrought, reflective but not nostalgic. A line like "now the chapter is closed and done" could land cliché and hollow, but Selena sings it like someone who finally took a breath of fresh air for the first time in years. This is all to say: if we have to listen to this one last song about Justin Bieber, at least it's the first genuinely compelling one, and a step in seeing her evolution as an artist and celebrity. [7]

Leah Isobel: When Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake broke up, he got to project his messy breakup feelings outward; he produced imagery about spying on her doppelganger and fantasizing about her death. But for Selena -- Timberlake's 2010s tabloid counterpart -- unrepentant sleaze is a much riskier proposition, at least on the charts. Instead, she sublimates her anger, returning to the baby-voiced Julia Michaels wheelhouse. The mass of vocal effects on the chorus is surprisingly effective, but for an artist who was briefly one of the more progressive voices on Top 40 radio, this defanged "Everytime" is a little disappointing. [4]

Katherine St Asaph: Piano ballads are to music what Joseph Campbell is to narratives. Not a song but a beat on a storyboard -- barely a storyboard, even, but tabloid kerfuffle. [1]

Michael Hong: Selena Gomez's career has long mirrored Demi Lovato's, from child acting stints on Barney & Friends to the release of their fifth studio albums within a week of each other in 2015. Here she goes for something similar to Lovato's "Sober," released last year as a sort of song-as-a-statement -- though Gomez's statement is more uplifting than heartbreaking. "Sober" was a rare instance where Lovato never pushed her voice too far, with its statement made more effective by the events that followed; her confession came across as authentically personal as it unfolded in real-time. "Lose You to Love Me," like "Sober," is stripped down to its bare bones for a more intimate feeling, but here, it's questionable whether the quiet dynamic is one of Gomez's stylistic choices or a symptom of her limited vocal range. There are interesting touches, like the echo-chamber effect on her voice for the line "in two months, you replaced us," which makes the following lines about being broken all the more devastating. But there are also moments like the choir vocals on the final chorus that are predictably overwrought. While "Lose You to Love Me" is a delicately gorgeous and uplifting track, its statement is diminished by how tiresome the Gomez-Bieber narrative feels. We're no longer watching her relationship end in the present, but instead seeing Selena Gomez finally claim closure on a relationship that has long since run its course (at least in the public eye). More interesting is the single released the following day, which features the offbeat personality she's carved out for herself over the past few years and is equally effective at demonstrating that Selena Gomez has moved on. [6]

Alfred Soto: In a tradition of self-reflexive love songs, she tells us she'll sing the chorus off-key (it sounds okay to me). Maybe this line represents one of Selena Gomez's contributions. If I see Julia Michaels, I think of phony uplift, of which the chorus has hints. Then Gomez counters with a slightly hoarse, un-melodramatic dropping of the line, "You promised the world and I fell for it. A performance with grandness in its bones, and it almost succeeds. [6]

Stephen Eisermann: I'm a sucker for big, cathartic choruses, but the verses really let me down here. Between Selena's weird vocal, the melodramatic strings, and the unintentionally funny lyrics (I'm not convinced that the whole singing off-key line isn't a bit that she's delivering with a wink), it's really hard to take the track seriously. But when that big booming chorus hits, backing vocals and all, you can almost feel Selena letting go of everything Bieber did to her. And that, that's lovely. It's also why the other track released after this is so much better. [5]

Joshua Copperman: A song that's perfectly in tune with 2019-type sad music yet unafraid to be huge. It doesn't have the stakes of "Praying" or the bounce of "It Ain't Me," but that's not a problem. The gang vocals that plagued so much of mid-to-late 2010s pop -- including Selena Gomez's own music -- blossom into a full choir, beautifully contrasting with her usual hushiness. It should be Real Music-y --even the lyrics are less playful and twee than Michaels and Tranter usually go, barring the "killing me softly" shoehorn and obvious title -- but because of how thin Gomez's voice sounds, it's not. (The most Michaels-y touch is the backing vocals going "to love, to love" instead of "to love me, love me" like I'd thought, as in "I needed to lose you to love again at all.") The pop most beloved non-mainstream artists are producing is proudly campy, and that's great! Gomez seems to be headed in that direction too with "Look at Her Now," but this unexpected pivot to pathos inexplicably works thanks to the strategic arrangement and lyricism. [9]

Kayla Beardslee: It's fascinatingly difficult to determine where Julia Michaels' style ends and Selena Gomez's begins, and the whispered melodies and "Issues" violins here don't help. Although Gomez's voice can sometimes be aggressively pleasant, she digs in enough to communicate real emotion here, and the choir backing vocals are surprisingly powerful. The song makes a poignant, if heavy-handed, statement about maturing and finding your identity, amplified by this being her comeback single: Ariana has "thank u, next," Miley has "Slide Away," and now Selena has "Lose You to Love Me." [7]

Jackie Powell: While Julia Michaels has commented that Selena Gomez is indeed a songwriter, I still don't believe that's the proper term to describe her contributions to music. Gomez is a storyteller first and foremost. That's the term: storyteller. Sometimes those can be interpreted as synonymous or givens of each other, but let's remember that Gomez has been telling stories since she was seven years old. Her art is most successful when she's in control of her narrative and knows exactly what story she's about to tell. When she has the opportunity to perform her stories, she goes all out and sells it exactly as someone who's been on stage since childhood can. That may sound like something Ariana Grande has done in the past year or so with "thank u, next," since both "Lose You to Love Me" and that highlight some of the most dramatic breakups in pop culture. But as Tatiana Cirisano pointed out for Billboard, Gomez's approach is the contrapositive to Grande's. Both cuts are relatable and have a commitment to empowerment and autonomy, but Gomez makes her track a moment without a teen movie pastiche. Her choice to emphasize and crescendo on the lyrics "In two months you replaced us" and "Made me think I deserved it" speak loudly. This track is all about its dynamics in its minimalistic glory. Imagine Gomez was performing a monologue. That's the type of choice a storyteller makes. Justin Tranter and Michaels provide the melody and the nuts and bolts, but the concept is clearly all Gomez. The backing vocals in each chorus from Tranter and Michaels are symbolic of what they've meant to Gomez over the years. They've been by her side every step of the way and have lifted her up. That's beautiful. What's also beautiful is if I ever wanted to learn more about Justin Bieber, the lyrics "Sang off-key in my chorus / 'Cause it wasn't yours" tell me all I need to know. [8]

Josh Buck: The Selena Gomez x Julia Michaels joints never miss. [6]

Abdullah Siddiqui: Selena Gomez's discography in the last four years has largely consisted of stylistic meandering and incomplete ideas. She hasn't quite been able to settle on a sound or a narrative. This feels like she's starting from scratch. It's a pretty solid place to start. [7]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox]

#Selena Gomez #pop #music #music review #writing

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floral-hex · 5 years

Text

To be ignored

Decent day. Cried myself to sleep last night, but still, it was a mostly decent day. Went and read at Starbucks for awhile. It’s becoming a habit. I’ve found I need to make up reasons to get myself out of the house, and coffee & books seems like a good excuse. I’m sure there are more productive ways I could be utilizing my newly single alone time, but for now this will do. So I went and sat for a couple of hours and finished my book, which I was happy with. I am mildly embarrassed to admit that I don’t read nearly enough, so any time I actually manage to finish a book is some small cause for celebration.

I bought an ex box. A box for my ex. Not FOR her, but her reminders. Pictures of us, ticket stubs, scraps of paper she’s doodled on, things she’s made or given to me that I can’t quite disassociate her memory from. I don’t think she’d want to keep any of them. I don’t know why I want to keep them. I miss her. It hurts. I guess this is my way of reconciling my need to move on and my desire not to let her go. So I’ll put our memories in a small box and hide it in the back of my closet and try not to open it again. I don’t want to lose her. I mean... I already have. She left. It’s over. But I’m sentimental. I want to keep what I can of her. I don’t know if it’s healthy. It’s always played as a joke in tv shows, the ex gf/bf box. When we started dating, she went out of her way to tear up photos of my previous ex that I still had. I understand that. My previous ex cheated on me, something I still don’t completely blame her for. It was a tumultuous and incredibly strained, unhealthy relationship. I was okay with her photos being destroyed. But with... you know, I hate called her my ex, my current ex, this latest heartbreak, this one, THE ONE... with her, I don’t want to lose these memories, these mementos. We’ll see how I feel in 6 months, or a year, or who knows how long before I “move on.”

So I picked out a box and some sad love song started playing in the store and I spent my time trying to pick out what chips I wanted while trying not to cry. It’s funny. So grumpy and sad and red eyed carrying around a small box and a big bag of funyuns. I can get over it quick enough these days. Distractions. I get in the car and I want to listen to sad music, but I don’t feed that part of my heart. This isn’t a fucking indie movie where I’ll put on a slow song and cry on the way home and it’s cathartic. No, I put on the noisiest album I have on my phone and spend the drive listening to screaming and static (thank you, Prurient). You don’t have to honor your pain. It doesn’t deserve your time. I’m not going to give my heartache a soundtrack or ambiance just so I can feel like shit all night. Thank you therapy for coping mechanisms.

But sometimes I still cry before falling asleep.

Because I miss her. And, impersonally, I miss having someone to talk to. I don’t know how to talk to new people. I tried talking to a girl the other day. Cute, but it was hard to get a conversation going. With a lot of people, it feels like pulling teeth to have a decent conversation. I worry I’m not interesting and I’m more than okay with the other party mainly talking about themselves, people seem to love talking about themselves, but god, so often it feels like I’m running the conversation. I have to move everything along. I’m the only one asking questions. People don’t want to know about my life, which is... it’s fine, but they also never seem to want to move along the conversation or actually develop a rapport. Every statement is closed at the end. There’s no discussion. There’s nothing open ended to build on or interest on their part. So I ask her if she just wants to just meet and get coffee instead. No, she would rather keep talking for awhile, to be safe, which is great, smart, a good plan, but she doesn’t talk except when I ask questions and it feels more like I’m asking questions about a job I want. “Hi, yes, tell me about yourself, what are you looking for, what kind of pets do you have?” Whatever. It happens all the time. Tinder is scary. I see I get a new match and I freak out, see who it is, and a couple of times already I’ve unmatched right away just because... I don’t know. I want something, some closeness, but I’m scared. Opening up is scary. So I invite it and then I deny it, and in the off chance I try to be brave and open up to someone, they disappoint. I don’t know. It’s hard. I miss the easiness of my ex. How easy it was to connect. We talked a lot in the beginning before even meeting. I’m worried about trying to find something like that again. I can’t rush it, I suppose. I just want to be happy. And I can’t deny, I miss being close with someone. Ok, so I’m lonely and gross. Whatever.

This is a lot. Wow. I didn’t mean to write even a quarter of this much. Sorry.

#this is a lot #text

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a-fragment · 5 years

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Best of John Mayer

John Mayer is coming to town (figuratively), and I’m not ready for that. I, as the peasant who cannot afford to go to his concert, will tell you on how to prepare yourself to meet the man; Learn his best tracks! (opinion based on my point of view). I initially planned to limit the list into five, but eventually not doing so because I swear I can’t pick out only five songs out of so many good songs of John. So, here we go.

1. John Mayer - In your Atmosphere

This is the song that introduces me to JM. I practically spent my entire 11th and 12th years of senior high school listening to this. And up until now, this is still one of my ultimate favorite songs. It’s the lyrics, the sound, the voice. Everything matches so perfectly. This song doesn’t even have the studio version, but holy crap, that what makes it more perfect.

I actually love all of the words in the lyrics but this got me;

All the street lights say never mind never mind And the canyon lines say never mind Sunset says we see this all the time, never mind, never mind

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7K2DQ8XBRbU

2. John Mayer - Stop This Train

Whoop! Dare I say you, John is the winner of making a coming-of-age song. That statement is proven by this particular song. I shouldn’t have stated before that I love In Your Atmosphere because of the lyrics, sound, voice, since, dude, John Mayer’s songs are always perfect, lyrics-wise, sound-wise and, of-freaking-course, voice-wise.

It’s real difficult to pinpoint my most favorite part. ‘Cause rather than singing, this song seems like a conversation, between him and the listener. I’ve been in his position. To hate growing up, to prefer staying home, feeling safe and sound, to keep the life as it is without wanting a change. Everyone does, I guess, at some points in their life. Somehow, this song assures me, that; Everything will change, but you will be fine; Your people will leave, but that’s life, everyone comes and goes.

Stop this train I want to get off and go home again I can't take the speed it's moving in I know I can't But, honestly, won't someone stop this train?

So scared of getting older I'm only good at being young So I play the numbers game To find a way to say that life has just begun

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sHhhTtqWcOM

3. John Mayer - Slow Dancing in a Burning Room

Now, now, from this number onward, the order of my song’s preference could be changed based on the mood lol.

I think I’m obliged to include one more song of John from the Continuum album because everyone was like, “Continuum is the greatest masterpiece of Mayer.” So, besides Stop This Train, pardon for Gravity, Slow Dancing in a Burning Room is also what I’m very fond of. I mean, just please listen to how he starts off the song. The guitar, tho!

Go cry about it - why don't you? Go cry about it - why don't you? Go cry about it - why don't you?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IfFi4Q7ueA8

4. John Mayer - 83

I've listened to this song since years ago but only later realize the worth of it. This song, similar to Stop This Train, also depicts the dislike of growing up and the longing of the past.

The passing of my granddad made the emphasis of; Yes, things have changed. Lots of things has changed. And, we get no turn-back. I was literally on my way home while listening to this, so I choked up for a bit at that time. And for the rest of ride, I just kept on romanticizing about the past.

I've these dreams of Walking home Home where it used to be

I love how 83 includes “I wish I was 6 again,” explicitly written yet still feels romantic.

And most my memories have escaped me or confused themselves with dreams

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Ep9hbz8oho

5. John Mayer - Split Screen Sadness

Well, this is the most sweetest song about separation. I just love how he sang the part below. Once again, John is a lyrical genius, also proven by these:

I called because I just Need to feel you on the line Don't hang up this time And I know it was me who called it over, but I still wish you'd fought me 'til your dying day Don't let me get away

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SPvYTx_3cOE

6. John Mayer - Born and Raised

Based on genius.com, “Through this song Mayer shares realization that he no longer has a lifetime of dreams and goals to look forward to – he is already an adult who has a passed a good chunk of his life.”

Another song about life. Can’t help it. So, basically this song tells a story about someone who has matured and become a bit more introspective with age. Very honest piece of art. It’s hard to decide which part is my favorite because everything is just too relatable. And we should also talk about the harmonica. Dayum!

So line on up and take your place Show your face to the morning Because one of these days you’ll be Born and raised and it All comes up without warning

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c8Ui2MWRyw0

7. John Mayer - Dear Marie

“Anyone who has ever had a first love when they were younger should feel touched by this song. Everyone goes back and tries to google their high school sweetheart. Thank you John for being so relatable.“ from someone on youtube.

The quotation gives justice for my feeling. This is a very sweet song from John. A song not for his first love, but for someone who used to have crush on him. The lyrics is pretty short, but c'mon, being noticed by senpai (yes, I’m trying to be funny here) is everything. Gee! Imagine John tries to find your photograph online, cute.

Dear Marie, tell me what it was I used to be Dear Marie, tell me what it was I used to be And if you’re further up the road can you show me what I still can’t see.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s0zaNpics48

8. John Mayer - I Guess I Just Feel Like

It is a wrong of me if I don't include any newest track of John. The first time I listen to this song, I was like, this is honestly what is happening in the world right now. For me, this song is showing about a person who is so done with life. But thanks for a certain someone on youtube who’s explaining about the last verse of the song, where John is changing ‘feel’ to the past tense ‘felt’. It signifies that the exhaustion is only a passing moment. We all should keep thriving.

I guess I just feel like Nobody's honest Nobody's true Everyone's lying To make it on through I guess I just feel like I'm the same way, too

I love how he didn’t try to put all the blame on other people but also himself. Because in the end, we somehow always end up becoming the person we used to hate.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CQEoLHeI0tA

So, while we are at it, do also listen to these War of My Life, Back to You, Clarity, Heartbreak Warfare, Who Says, Edge of Desire, The Age of Worry, Paper Doll, All We Ever Do is Say Goodbye, No Such Thing, Shadow Days, Queen of California, Gravity, Whiskey Whiskey Whiskey, and literally every song of The Search for Everything album.

#johnmayer #john mayer

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