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#this concept that everyone has One True Love waiting for them
the-everqueen · 11 months
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17 + 24 for violence ask game pwease :3 perhaps both sandyman and sucksession
17. there should be more of this type of fic/art para mansand: i want more Lucienne art in general. Viv's insta features some fucking cute fits that would be great fanart inspo. for fic...i'm going to continue preaching the gospel of Coco/Luce. i'm currently writing the Coco/Rose fic i wanted, because the people who write that pairing turned me onto it and i owe them my life.
para succshow: i have many many arts in my likes after the finale, pero if anyone has Roman Roy in that cage with a dog collar...that would be highkey relevant to my interests. idk if anyone is doing the cosmic horrors/waystar crossover but i do sometimes think about the kids' monstrosity being literal.
24. topic that brings up the most rancid discourse already answered but just for you, shall answer again 😘
para mansand: "here's why h*b/dream are actually soulmates" inevitably leads to some incredibly misogynist (and occasionally biphobic) takes. i'm not sure why, in the year of our lord 2023, we continue to find "person you are inextricably bound to" as anything other than horrifying (and if someone has a horror fic based on that premise, lmk), but then again, i'm also not sure why the very normal stance "i like [this] ship" nearly always becomes an excuse to shit on fictional women. (that's a rhetorical statement, i know why.) the actors already gave us the lovely line "Dream is the cast bicycle" so i think people should run with that and diversify the ecosystem.
para succshow: i should say Shiv, because no one can be normal about the one woman, pero sometimes i do a great job curating my experiences on the margins of fandom, and i've actually seen some really good nuanced takes on the finale. so instead i'm going to say tom/greg discourse is, imho, Bad. these men don't secretly love each other. no one loves each other on this show. no one on this show knows what love is. that line "i'd castrate you and marry you in a heartbeat" is not fucking romantic, it's about ownership and dominance because that's the framework of all relations under capitalism. and that's the only framework the Roys have for anything.
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il-miele-che-scrive · 2 months
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Can I request something similar to your latest Lewis smau except y/n is Toto's daughter? It's controversial because she's younger, you know the drill
Sure!! <3 For this one I made Y/n a singer
Btw the song in this fic is made up lol
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username1 She's PRECIOUS
username2 Y/n is so me
username3 Honestly that's so reletable
username4 I swear this girl will pet any creature she can, how isn't she scared of catching some disease?
↳username1 Have you ever heard of water? Is the concept of washing your hands familiar to you?
username5 Oh to be a cat pet by Y/n Wolff...
username6 A rich girl petting strays... Imagine how much of a better place the world would be if she put the same energy into some charity work
↳username7 Y/n is known for doing charity work when it comes to animals. Pretty sure some % of her earnings goes to several pet charities, organizations. Not to mention she's been vegan for a few years now
↳username8 Wow immagine if you did your research before commenting
↳username9 i love how Y/n was born into the rich life but has always been humble and used her money to help others
username10 Literally she gets a lot of hate for being a daughter of a billionaire like okay next time she'll choose to be born poor lmao
username11 exactly!! there's a difference between flexing on daddy's money and using your daddy's money for good causes
username9 pretty sure she makes her own money now;)
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y/n_wolff Busy day at work 😋 look who I bumped into on the way to the studio!!
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georgerussell63 Look at you finally doing some work
↳y/n_wolff Don't worry, soon I'm back at my 2nd job (I just hang around the paddock looking all pretty and stuff)
georgerussell63 No, thank you ❤️ we don't miss you
lewishamilton Speak for yourself George, Roscoe likes when Y/n babysits him
y/n_wolff Roscoe is the only one who understands me for real 😭
roscoelovescoco Petition for an invitation next time you go to the studio
↳y/n_wolff I swear I sent one, it must've got lost on the way 🥹 the pigeon dropped it or something
roscoelovescoco Still using pigeons? That's not very vegan of you...
y/n_wolff Hey! I pay them, alright? If they didn't want to, they wouldn't do this job...
y/n_wolff (hey everyone this is a joke obv)
username3 Imagine what will happen when the haters see this comment section lol
mercedesamgf1 Can't wait to hear it ❤️
↳y/n_wolff 🫶
oscarpiastri Look at that last pic of Y/n with Lando
↳landonorris fuck you if I was an animal i wouldn't be a cat
y/n_wolff Right, you'd be a worm.
landonorris would you guys still love me if I was a worm?
oscarpiastri No
y/n_wolff No
username1 May this be a love song 🤞I need to her one from Y/n after her terrible breakup last year
↳username2 She had a boyfriend last year??
username1 Yeah, we don't know anything about him besides the fact that he broke her heart... Poor girl deserves some true love
username2 Was it a driver?
username1 I highly doubt it, they wouldn't be able to keep it so private
alex_albon Pls make it singable on track
↳y/n_wolff 😬 well...
alex_albon Y/n...
y/n_wolff It's a love song...
username4 SHE ADMITTED!! IT'S A LOVE SONG!!
↳username5 Our girl is in love again 😭
username4 I just hope he treats her better than her ex. Otherwise imma need to talk to him
maxverstappen1 If you like cats so much you should come over sometime
↳username4 Cats rizz 💀
↳username2 No cuz Max has had a crush on Y/n for so long now and I'd love to see them together
↳y/n_wolff You're a few weeks too late 😂🙈
username3 EXCUSE ME I NEED TO KNOW WHO THE MAN IS
username5 Me too, I just wanna talk... *cracking fingers*
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y/n_wolff The one I prayed for out now, let me know your thoughts 🩷🕊️
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georgerussell63 Since when are you so religious?🤨
↳y/n_wolff He changed me ❤️
oscarpiastri Great, another song Lando will make me unwillingly listen to
↳y/n_wolff You love my music, don't lie
landonorris yes he does
oscarpiastri Alright, I know a few songs
y/n_wolff A few songs my ass, I saw that iconic interview where you and Lando sing my songs
landonorris he will never admit it but he was a fan YEARS before he got into f1 and met you
y/n_wolff Not like I stalk his Twitter but I saw a post from 2019 about me, it had like 5 likes and Oscar was one of them lmao
landonorris i knew you had daddy issues but are you okay?
↳y/n_wolff Yeah why?? Wtf??
landonorris well after hearing this song I'm not
username1 "They may judge the age we are, the differences they see, but love knows not of boundaries, it only seeks to be free" MY GIRL IS A POET 😭
username2 I'm not ready to meet this man after hearing "He's walked through fire, faced his fears, but in his heart, there's room for tears" 😭
carmenmmundt Truly in love with the lyrics, they're out of this world, out of this century
↳y/n_wolff Thank you love 🥹
lewishamilton The chorus got me in a chokehold💜
↳y/n_wolff He's the one I prayed for, in the dead of night, a love like ours, hidden from sight. If people knew, they'd say it's wrong, but in his arms I belong🥹
↳username4 What is Lewis doing here...?
username5 Chill, he drives for Mercedes. George also commented in case you didn't notice
username3 Lyrics so beautiful miss girl was born in the wrong generation
↳username2 fr it sounds straight from 20th century poetry, she's too pure for the age of quick tinder hookups
username6 I knew what her father was like but damn...that song screams daddy issues...
↳username7 Y/n said music is her therapy, that's just how she chooses to express her emotions
username8 When are we going to talk about this part of the lyrics?? "In his eyes, reflections of victory, every triumph and mystery. He's raced through life, faced every curve"?? THIS HAS TO BE ABOUT A DRIVER
↳username9 Y/N AND MAX???
username10 me when I'm delusional
↳username11 I wish it was about Max, but it's certainly about an older guy. I mean, Max is a few years older than Y/n, but the song feels like the guy is in his 30s
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lewishamilton Summer break = days spent at the beach
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username1 Sir Lewis Hamilton casually adding his boss' daughter to his vacation pics 🤨
↳username2 fr did he think we wouldn't notice?
georgerussell63 Blink twice if Y/n forced you to post the last photo
↳lewishamilton She kindly asked and I agreed.
y/n_wolff Exactly. That's what I do. I ask. Kindly.
username3 SO HER SONG IS ABOUT HIM??
↳username4 Seems like it 🥹
username3 idk how I feel about it tbh... she's too young for him
username5 Yeah imo she'd be better with Max
username4 Shut the hell up guys, let them be happy, there must be a reason they're together
landonorris that's called soft launching, did you know that?
↳y/n_wolff Wdym?? We're just team bonding during the summer break
georgerussell63 Then why wasn't I at the team bonding?
y/n_wolff Uhhhh I'll call you back later, I'm driving through a tunnel 😬
username6 She's too young for him, will have her fun and move onto the next guy (Max?)
↳username7 You're the reason why so many celebs prefer to keep their relationships a secret
username8 WHAT DID TOTO SAY??
↳username6 Does he even know? 💀 AFAIK he doesn't have social media
username8 But it's impossible that he wouldn't know, right...?
y/n_wolff I love you but what is this basic caption?😭
↳lewishamilton I'd rather like to focus on how pretty you look
y/n_wolff I LOVE YOU 😭
landonorris simp
y/n_wolff Stfu Lando, you wish you could hang out with us at the beach
username3 Lmao didn't expect Lando calling the 7 times world champion a simp but here we are
username9 Okay guys but... The girlfriend effect? How will the girlfriend effect work in this case if Lewis is a fashion icon already?
↳username10 There must be a way for an upgrade, there always is
y/n_wolff Sorry, he's all perfect already🫶I guess the gf effect only applies to boys and my man is a real man🗡
maxverstappen1 Have fun ☀️ see you back on track soon
↳username6 Something doesn't feels right seeing Max in this comment section...
username10 Get your shit together, him and Y/n never had a thing, y'all made it all up based on one interview Max gave years ago
mercedesamgf1 🌞😎
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y/n_wolff He's the one I prayed for
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lewishamilton I love you babe but what is this basic caption?
↳y/n_wolff You're learning from the best, I see
georgerussell63 Good to know you're still team bonding 👍
↳y/n_wolff Yeah, we bonded really hard last night😌
georgerussell63 TMI
oscarpiastri The last pic 🤓
↳landonorris she's getting bold isn't she
y/n_wolff I don't have reasons to be shy tho, do I?
landonorris girl made one good song and made it her whole personality
↳y/n_wolff This is girlhood, you'd never get it
landonorris btw this is hard launching but in a 'we don't give a fuck' way
↳y/n_wolff Well, we don't 🤷‍♀️
username1 WHAT HAPPENED TO THE LITTLE Y/N😭
↳username2 She grew up 😭
username3 I love how nonchalant they're about it
carmenmmundt Someone's been working out🤭
↳y/n_wolff Now I have a personal trainer 😌
username4 WHAT DID TOTO SAY??
↳username5 Bet we're gonna see much more of smashing his headset after the break
username6 How is she so casual about it? We just found out she's dating LEWIS MF HAMILTON and she's acting like that's nothing
↳username3 I guess it is 'nothing' for her, she's known Lewis since she was really young
username7 That's what's giving me the biggest ick because this man has known her since she was an early teen and suddenly decided to date her?
username3 Yeah but she's in her 20s now, she's a consenting adult
username7 That's not normal, this is the definition of grooming
username3 I'm sorry I'm too european for your bullshit
username8 Lewis said fuck it I'm going to Ferrari next year anyway, might as well shoot my shot 💀
username9 Max Verstappen has been really silent
↳username10 Now he'll compete with Lewis not only for the championship but also for Y/n 😂
username9 It would be such a win
username11 Can y'all MaxY/n shippers shut up? I swear y'all are worse than Lestappen shippers
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y/n_wolff Roscoe working hard while his dad socializes with his grandpaw 🥳
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username1 I didn't even realize now that Y/n and Lewis are together it means Toto is Roscoe's grandpaw 😭
georgerussell63 Working hard or hardly working?
↳y/n_wolff No comment...
landonorris really shocked to see toto still gets along with lew
↳username2 Lando saying what we all think lol
↳y/n_wolff Dad was actually happy!!
landonorris does he hope you'll convince lew to stay in mercedes?
y/n_wolff How am I supposed to know 🤷‍♀️ you go talk to him
oscarpiastri New songs when?
↳y/n_wolff Soon!! (I haven't started working on them)
username2 I'm actually happy to see them happy and that Toto accepts Lewis as Y/n's boyfriend
↳username3 It's still weird 💀 imagine calling a 40 year old your 'boyfriend'
username2 People are allowed to find love at any age
username3 Lewis is closer in age to Toto than to Y/n
username2 And? Y/n isn't a child, she's a grown woman, if Lewis is what she wants, who are we to judge?
username3 It's just icky... It's not gonna last long
username4 I still can't stop thinking what could be if Y/n was dating Max 🥹
↳username5 fr my dream couple
username6 Y'all see how Y/n predicted people's reaction in her song? "If people knew, they'd say it's wrong" and y'all can't stop yapping about imaginary grooming or what her and Max could've been
↳username7 Girl should've kept it a secret, I feel sorry for them 🥲
↳username8 But in his arms I belong
y/n_wolff Okay everybody, I didn't want to talk about it, but you give me no choice. Lewis and I are in love, there was no grooming involved, I make my own decisions. I really wanted to cherish our love with my new music, but you make me re-think it. I don't feel excited to share our love with you anymore.
↳lewishamilton Don't worry about them darling ❤️
↳danielricciardo FEA
↳landonorris You have our support guys
↳oscarpiastri Don't let these comments get to you, they don't matter
↳georgerussell63 I know I usually act like a snappy older brother, but I love to see you happy (even if Lewis is the reason)
↳maxverstappen1 Haters are always gonna hate, but they don't deserve your attention
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ja3hwa · 6 months
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♡ 𝐃𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐲 𝐖𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐀𝐥𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐅𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐔𝐬, 𝐄𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐎𝐮𝐫𝐬 ♡
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Day 31 : Trick Or Teat
【Synopsis】 : The dead of night, creatures hide. In the light of a fire, those same creatures can become more.
『Word count』 :  7.01k
-> Genre: Supernatural. Smut. Angst. Fluff.
Paring: Yungi x Reader | Seonghwa x Reader [Eventual ot8 x Reader] 
[Warnings] : Self hatred. Abusive family. toxic family. Cult-like religon. Myths and supernatural concepts. The reader is giving off Genderfluid in some parts [not me projecting whoops]. hints of sexual abuse. Blood. Gore. Dark themes. Blood drinking. Kissing. Swearing. All the boys have a corruption kink cause why not. Fingering. Seonghw has a bit of a superiority complex. Details of torture and killing people. Unprotected sex. Yunho and Mingi are little shits. Eheh
HAPPY HALLOWEEN! Surprise!! This is the very first chapter and introduction to my new mini series I'll be writing. I know a lot of you have been wanting Vampire Ateez ot8x reader for a while, and I've been trying to find a good story, and i finally got one, hehe. Also, I wanted to make this fic extra long as well to say thank you for 4k followers. I still want to do an event, but I'm taking a little break first, so I hope this is okay for now.
I LOVE YOU ALL ♡♡♡
Check out the mini series masterlist -> [coming soon]
Masterlist | Navigation | Kinktober List | Part Two
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The Destiny Castle was filled with darkness and death. Guard dogs, the size of cows and strange beastly noises echoing in the forest surrounding. And warnings to anyone that enters the ground will never be seen again. Well, that's what the priest of your village says over time and time again. Blabbering about how god left the family that lived in the castle many centuries ago when they invited night-crawling creatures inside. Ones that drink blood and care little for the human race.
Vampires.
You sighed under your breath for the fifth or sixth time this evening as the sermon read on the large dusted book in front of him. Your hands were beginning to ache from having them clasped together for so long. Why were you even praying? It's not like you believe any of this bullshit. Yes, granted, some of it might sound true, and you had doubts on multiple occasions whether this man in the sky was, in fact, real or not. But did you really want to stick around and find out? When you die and you go to hell, so be it. You weren't scared of where you ended up. You were more scared of wasting your life away. Not finding the adventure you so desperately craved. But your picture-perfect parents with their picture-perfect kids shall have no such dreams. No such idea of living other than to tend to the market stall and be married to yet another picture-perfect family.
You felt your mother's god-awful stare as she clearly heard you sigh yet again. You hated her the most. Always finding new and improved ways to punish you for "your sins." Like rolling your eyes or talking back to a man. Or worse, not showing any signs of being a good future housewife so when she's finally ready to sell you off—oh I'm sorry, give you away—to some rich Christian suitor to be your husband. You could be the perfect version of yourself for her.
Perfect. Perfect. Perfect.
You hated that fucking word. A loud bell chime caught your attention, signalling that Sept was finished with his blabberings for the evening. So you stood up straight, your annoyingly over-layered dress before turning on your heels to leave.
"Oh wait, Dove. Come here, please." Your mother's overfaked and sugary sweet tone rattled in your ears. The use of the nickname Dove also annoyed you. Dove, meaning white pure bird that is trapped in a golden cage. Everyone had called you that since you were born, most people in the village not even knowing your real name, only know this nickname.
Why, you may ask?
Simple, your mother hated your name. You were named after your father's mother, who she hated. But it was tradition to name your firstborn after the father's mother, so here you were. Not only were you a disappointment to your mother, but you also bore a name that resembles hatred. Lucky you.
"This is Lucas Wheeler. He's Mary and Robert's Eldest son." Your mother's voice buttered up the introduction, leaning in with an absolutely disturbingly fake smile that everyone seemed to fall for. You turned your lip slightly, making a poor attempt to smile, which your mother did not approve of. "Luca, darling, this is my daughter."
His grin was wide and overexaggerated. His tunic was buttoned all the way up to his Adams apple, looking as if it was constricting his airflow. And his hair was perfectly brushed back. He was the definition of a good pure religious boy. A book nerd. You couldn't hide your disgust as he licked his lips, eyeing you like some piece of flesh. You knew what he was hiding. That filthy lust that men seemed to only be forgiven for. He has probably dreamed about shoving his cock in every woman that passes him and he was definitely only thinking about his needs while staring at you. Not marriage, not husband duty. No, the sole idea of finally getting his little dick wet was driving him crazy. And it made you want to chuck your guts up all over his clean shoes.
"You seem to have such a um, polite daughter here, Christine. She seems shy?" Lucas's mother, Mary spoke up trying to take a look at you but you kept your face pointed to the ground. You didn’t want to be there and you weren't about to fake a smile for a family you did not need to know. you wanted nothing more than to slip away and become invisible like you always did in these types of situations. But turning twenty has now made you in the public eye. Twenty and without a husband was rare. Normally women in your village were betrothed at sixteen and married at eighteen. But you have managed to wheezle your way out of it from your parents being too worried about your younger sisters. But you’ll be twenty-one soon and your mother, Christine was becoming impatient.
“She is a shy one. Sweet too. Micheal and I have been trying to find the perfect man for her, but her shyness seems to not be a lucky charm.” Your mother battered, throwing a sweet chuckle making Lucas’s parents laugh.
“Well, how about you both come over? Bring all your kids, for dinner. I’m sure my Luca would love to get to know her.” Mary pinched Lucas’s cheek making him push away slightly.
“Yes. I’d love to know more about your daughter. I’m sure we will be able to entertain one another while you get dinner ready.” his dark words made your stomach turn and flip. Now you were definitely going to be sick.
“It’s settled then. We will see you at sundown.” Your mother bid goodbye tugging you away by your arm out of the church, not letting you go for a second. Knowing you’d just run off the first chance you got.
-
Night came quicker than you would have liked and no matter how hard to tried to slip away your mother made sure that one of your sisters was always with you, ready to shout if you tried to bail. What was this some type of house imprisonment? You didn’t want to go, that was more than clear. But your mother couldn’t care less and your father well it was ‘whatever mother says goes’. so you were alone in the more honest terms. Your brothers were too young to know any different, your sister who is only two years younger than you was a cutout of your mother. And your little sister was daddy's little girl. She didn’t care about anything but her daddy.
What a perfect family you seem to have. Everyone fitted in somewhere but you. You were the experiment. The first batch of cookies to come out of the oven that no one touches cause they were too burned or not fully cooked.
“Come on we are going to be late.” Your mother's voice rang through the house, your sister's eyes not leaving you. She had muttered something before heading for the door. You had told her you just needed to put on some garments before meeting her downstairs. She was hesitant for a moment thinking this was a plan to escape but you had said that there was no time now and what would be the point. Sensing your defeat she left you alone. Finally.
You pull on some pants under your dress, hating having to wear such feminine clothing. It wasn’t that you were against wearing dresses or lace or even frills. It was more that sometimes you wanted pants. Was that so bad? You sighed putting all the clothes your sister had pulled out for you to try on, on the end of your bed. That was later you’s problem. You noticed your book laying on your pillow making you swear under your breath. Tucking it back under the sheets you wonder if your sister saw it. You hopped not, if she saw what you wrote or worse what you drew, she’d be telling the church to burn you at the stake.
You ran down the stairs quickly, not wanting to waste any more time, hoping that if you go over and get this night over with you can come back home and hide away in your room, wishing you were anywhere other than with this family.
-
This night seemed okay as far as talking about our lord and saviour over supper was. Mary was busy finishing up the final dish, letting Lucas and your parents laugh over a blessed bottle of wine. They had sent you and Lucas away to, get to know one another and Lucas had to perfect idea to show you his barn. A place where ‘he could be himself’. God, everything he says annoys you. Climbing the old rusty ladder, you stand in an empty hay loft. Your gut felt strange, like your body was warning you of something but you couldn’t quite put your finger on it. Until you felt a hand grip your shoulder softly but tight enough to make you freeze.
His breath was so close, pooling on your neck. fingers were ghosting along your corset strings making tears build in your eyes. Even though he was a little boy in your mind. He was much bigger than you and he could easily take advantage of you if you didn’t play your cards right. So you had to act. “And what might we get up to here hmm…”
His chuckle sickened you. “Well, we have some time before mother calls. So I thought we get to know each other. Just like our families wanted.” he pulled away, making a grunting sound behind you. You turned slowly to see he was sitting on a blanket that had been laid out on some hay. Was this disgusting excuse of a man really thinking he could charm you into sleeping with him? God, his ego was bigger than you thought. You giggled, waltzing around the small room pretending to think but in truth, you were looking for an exit. You could go down the ladder but he’d probably grab you before getting that low. Maybe over the side onto the beams. He won't be able to get to you then. But then you’d be trapped until you eventually have to climb back over. And you know he’s the type to wait you out.
A window. Probably leads onto the roof. Not practical but if you recall you did see a bunch of hay bails just outside so if you jump you’d be able to land on them. And a broken ankle or wrist was better than….”Where is your mind wondering, baby? Do I scare you?”
Your head snaps back to him, giving him a small smile. “Oh, no…no…” You step closer, looking him deep in his eyes. “you don’t scare me…baby…” You stood right above his laying figure, his legs spread, enough for you to place a foot in between them. A grim smirk painted his unpleasant features. he went to sit up and you used this as your now or never, kicking him right in the balls without another thought. His groan was loud, knowing if it weren't for how far you were from the house. Everyone would have heard.
“You little bitch!” You ran for the window, crawling out as quickly as you could. The top of your dress got caught on a nail ripping the fabric. But you didn’t waste any time to cry about broken material, looking for the hay bails. It wasn’t as high of a jump as you thought, sliding down the straw, making some of it get caught in your dress. You could hear Lucas groaning in the distance as you started to run. Run fast and run far.
You needed to go home. Quickest route is through the forestry back towards the centre of the village before turning off from the church. Jump Mr Smith's fence and climb the vines into your room. Simple enough. But it's dark, a little too dark and all you could hear was your heartbeat in your ears and rabid footsteps in the distance. The forest was thick. Trees tightly snug together. You almost tripped several times over branches and roots. Your heart was racing now, panting as your mind was becoming hazy. Need to get home. Need to get home.
“Ohhhh Little Dove, where are you.” Lucas’s deep sinister voice echoed through the dark forest. He was too close, you needed to stop. Hide. Maybe he’d go past you or head back. “Come out, baby. We were just having some fun.”
Quiet. Be silent. don’t move. Not a mucsle.
He called your name this time your real one making you gulp. His voice was maybe two or three trees away from where you stood. A twig snaps and you feel tears in the corners of your eyes. He was so close it was like you could still feel his breath. “Come on princess...” His hand wrapped the tree you were standing against and everything stopped. You closed your eyes thinking for a moment, trying to play thousands of scenarios of how you could get away. But nothing would work. He caught you. He danced the bend, slipping right into your view. Before you could run his hand gripped your throat making you freeze. “Don’t worry baby. I don’t bite.”
His words were short... sinister, like he had achieved his ultimate goal of capturing his prey. Your eyes widened going to spit back a comment but your words caught in your throat as you saw a figure suddenly appear behind Lucas. Tall, dark. Red eyes glowing through the night. Everything happened so quickly, the beast grasped Lucas the same way he had you, pulling him back with fright. “But I do…”
The creature's fangs pierced the disgusting man's neck making him scream out a noise that would make your blood curdle. His grip dropped from you, trying to scratch and fight off the larger figure. You took this moment to run, not even caring if the creature was going to kill him or not. All you knew was you needed to run. But you couldn’t run home anymore. There’s blood on your hands literally, Lucas’s blood splattered on you. If this wasn’t a perfect situation the priest was looking for to burn you at the stake you don’t know what is. “Hey, this way.”
You physically jump hearing a high-pitched voice cooe at you through the wind. It was a hooded figure, and normally you would of not gone with a stranger but in this case it seemed fair. You followed the person who seemed to be always a few steps ahead of you at all times no matter how hard you tried to catch up. It was only then, when you stopped focusing on the person to look around you noticed they were leading you to the castle grounds. Where myth reads vampires inhabit. That must have been what got Lucas.
A blood sucking vampire.
You stopped in your tracks not knowing to go back or forward. It’s not like vampires scared you per se. It was just. You were human and they are beasts. They would certainly eat you before you could plead your case. But one of them saved you right? That’s what it was doing? Not just finding two humans and deciding to have a late-night snack right….
“Hey over here.” The figure called for you again but when you looked up everything suddenly went black.
-
Your head was ringing. Heartbeat thumping slowly in your ears. Black splotches clouded your vision as you tried to look around. You were in a room. A Billiard room, to be exact. You have never seen a room of such a size. The bottom of your house most definitely fitting in this room alone. The leather under your fingers felt expensive, seeing the brown with bubbled texture. It was lavish, elegant—
"Beautiful, isn't it." A smooth voice swayed your attention, having caught you admiring the fine fabrics of the furniture. Your eyes locked with deep crimson ones. He was like nothing you've ever seen before. He was stunning, tall, and broad. You had to gulp at the sheer beauty of the man. But you knew he wasn't just a man. From his eyes, you knew he was a beast, a night crawler.
"Are you going to respond? Or are you more of a staring type?" Another voice scared you slightly. Looking to your left, you see another man, but he was sitting on the couch next to you. His black undercut fitted his features perfectly. He kind of sounded like the hooded figure that was helping you get away before...
"Definitely the quiet, staring type." A cheeky tone to your right. He was leaning on the pool table, his Cheshire cat grin painting his features smugly.
So there's three of them that live here?
"Now now, Woo, San. She's probably just scared." A shorter but beefier male suddenly stood next to the first one that spoke. He wasn't even looking at you, mostly paying attention to the two he called Woo and San. You were now sitting straight up, moving your gaze from each of them. As they were all in their own worlds arguing about why you might not be talking.
"You're bleeding, Tiny?" A voice growled behind you, startling you. You turned to see two very big men standing behind the couch. "When did you cut yourself?" He dragged his two fingers through your wound, making you hiss, pulling away from him.
He put one of his fingers in his mouth, closing his eyes as if he were savouring the taste. Once he was done, he placed his other bloody finger in the male next to him, mouth. The other man groaned his eyes, glowing a harsher red as he stared you down. "You taste delicious, Sugar."
You went to stand, trying to get away from them, but your legs gave out, making you fall forward in front of the high-pitched boy who still sat on the other couch. "Be careful, Dollface. Don’t want ya gettin hurt."
"Okay, let's give her some space. Wooyoung, take San down to the kitchens and see if dinner is ready yet. Mingi and Yunho can go set the table." The one that stood at the door, the first man directed all the men with ease. They will followed without another word, heading for the door. "And for the love of Lillith, Jongho, can you please find your lover and Hongjoong. I think they were still cleaning up from..." He looked at you briefly. "Dealing with that disgusting human."
You knew he was talking about Lucas, and that meant this Lover boy or Hongjoong had been the one you saw ripping through Lucas's neck. They all left soon after, leaving you alone with the dominant man. You managed to sit back on the couch, but you wanted, needed to stand. So you tried your luck again, and your knees buckled, making you slip forward, but instead of making an impact with the ground, two large arms were wrapped around your waist. Your hands gripped the creature's biceps, feeling his muscles taught and tense. "You do need to be careful, Darling."
Unlike Lucas's or any man, you've ever met really. These creatures don't seem to set off any of your alarms. You didn’t know if that was a bad thing or not, but you chose to brush it off, ‘cause in the end, you had never felt such kindness from anyone in the village. You were out-casted, unloved. You might as well be the witch they all wanted you to be. The kind smile that painted his features made your heart skip. He was indeed handsome. You finally spoke up saying who you were and the man looked at you with surprise before laughing. “Oh, I’m sorry. My name is Seonghwa. It’s nice to meet you…”
Your name rolled off his tongue so beautifully. No one had ever used it to address you before. It was almost strange, foreign even. “Honestly you could call me anything. I was never called that name sadly.”
Seonghwa hummed in response, still holding tight on you. In truth, he knows much more about you than he leads on. When he and the others go on hunts he had found you a year ago. Ironically you were having your nineteenth birthday. On your own of course. He remembers the way you spoke to yourself, wishing yourself a happy birthday while you drew in your book. Your feet were in the cool water of the watering hole in the forestry just outside the village. You went there almost every second day. And so did he.
There was something about you that caught his eye. Caught all of the boy's eyes. You were special but none of them could put their finger on it. So of course when they found you running for your life from a disgusting man. They couldn’t stand by and let anything happen to their precious little human.
-
Dinner was quick as you just sat there and ate in silence. The others were loud though, making it seem almost normal. Like everything that was happening was something you all were used to already. Seonghwa had told you about all the boys and what all their names were. It took you a moment to put names to faces but once you got it. It was easy. Seonghwa never left your side. Making sure you were safe and comfortable. You appreciated it, understanding it must have been weird to have a human walking around. But you quickly learnt that all the maids and butlers were human. They got paid and some even lived on the estate.
Everything the village said about vampires and creatures in general was so wrong. And secretly you always wanted it to be wrong. So you were glad they weren't purely just bloodsucking beasts. But every now and then that face you saw popped into your head. You still didn’t know which one killed Lucas. And on top of it, this Hongjoong and Yeosang—Seonghwa had told you his name—were nowhere to be found.
“Okay well, sun will be up soon. Let’s get ready for bed.” Seonghwa again spoke up, dying down the chatter. It was like he took on a motherly role in the house. It was cute.
“Come Sugarcube. Yunho and I will show you to your room.” The one named Mingi flashed you a smile making you smile in response. Bidding Seonghwa goodnight or would It be morning now? Mental note to look out for a clock. The halls were lavish and carpeted, matching all the rooms you’ve seen thus far. Everything was perfect, vintage and beautiful. Yunho and Mingi had caught onto your mind wandering and had stopped for a moment, seeing how far you’d walk without them near you. You were very cute to them. Like a clueless bunny, with wide innocent eyes.
“Hey, Tiny. Your room is over here.” Yunho’s far voice snapped you out of your thoughts making you turn around to see both large men. Their arms crossed, with big grins. Your face was redder than a tomato in seconds making them both groan at how you waddle back quickly. Cute. Too cute. “This is where you’ll be saying. We’ll try and get some of your personal things tomorrow.”
“Yeah, Hongjoong had said something about grabbing some stuff while your family are out tomorrow.” Mingi rubbed the back of his neck as you slipped past both men to look into the huge spacious room. Only hours ago you were about to be married off to some pig and live on his farm until your death to now staying with not one but eight vampires.
And what was worse. You couldn’t go back. Not that you’d want to that is. But still, all your life you’ve known one thing and now… “You okay Tiny? Not the style you like? We have like ten other rooms if you want to-No it’s okay it’s just…�� You cut Yunho off before taking a seat on the olive green and black silk sheets that lay on the large king bed.
“Did…Did Lucas die?” You don’t understand why you were asking about that pig but you needed to know. You needed to know would your parents found his mangled body and thought the beast that did that also killed you. Or would they think you did it? Yunho sat on his knees in front of you, placing his large hands on your thighs in a comforting manner. His smile was soft and his fingers grazing on your exposed skin was gentle.
“No. Yeosang left him alive. But he won't be wanting to live with the way he looks now.” You don’t know if Yunho’s words made you feel better or worse.
“Hongjoong helped him drag him back to that barn. His parents found him and they are looking for you at the moment.” Mingi revealed, knowing you’ll just keep asking questions so there was no reason to hide anything from you.
“Do my parents think I’m dead?” Deep down you knew they’d be happy either way. Dead, alive. Murderer or innocent. Your family would plead their sob story about the monster you were regardless of the truth.
“No…Lucas told them you ran. They think you were a part of it. Luring him out there for your vampire lover to have a meal.” Yunho felt disgusted with himself for repeating what Hongjoong had told them your parents said. But what else should they do?
“Vampire lover….hmm.” You smiled, starting to laugh. That’s what they probably thought you were sneaking off to at random hours of the day or night. Both of the men looked at one another with confusion, letting Mingi sit down next to you.
“Something funny with that Sugarcube?” Mingi’s voice was so deep, velvety. It made your core tingle and heart race. You looked up at him with tears in your eyes, but still giving him a smile.
“My mother has wanted nothing but to pin some devilish thing on me and now she gets it. Something that said I did not serve the lord. Argh…” Tears ran down your cheeks “Fuck the lord. Why should I have to care what an old man did for humanity?! I just wanted to paint. Find adventure. Not marry and be a baby maker for some lowlife pig.” All your pent-up anger. All your disappointment. Every single thing you wished to say to your mother was pouring out, in front of two vampires you had only met hours ago now. It felt like a weight being pushed off your chest and you were no longer drowning. Mingi’s hand rubbed circles on your lower back making you fall into his embrace, letting him hold you while Yunho straightened up so he could hold you as well. They were beasts that could drain you in seconds yet they held you like they’ve known you for years. They listened as if they cared. They spoke as if you were the most important person in the world. why?
“There, there baby. It’s okay. You’re free now. You can do anything you want.” Yunho’s voice was quiet almost barely above a whisper. But still still heard him. You pulled away letting them still hold you but you could wipe your face. You can do anything? No one has ever said that to you.
“Well...I guess since this my first time of freedom…” You had both the vampire's attention now with your words. “I want a bath. One with lots of bubbles.” You’ve never had such a thing in your life only settling for quick showers or sharing bathing pools with your siblings. Not something lavish. Mingi laughed a deep hearty laugh. As if you couldn't get any more cute, there you went.
“I think that’s a perfect idea Sugar. We’ll get one of the maids to fix one up for you. And…” He placed his hands on either shoulder pushing you towards Yunho. Your face inches from him. Mingi inspected the wound of your shoulder blade noticing it was already closing but blood was still pooling out of it slowly. “Get this wound cleaned up…”
His tongue licked a strip upwards, following the wound. You hiccuped feeling a slight sting from him. Yunho however distracted you by giving you a kiss. Your eyes were wide and confused. He… he was kissing you. His soft lips moved slowly against yours. His tongue dipped around your bottom lip, testing the waters. Perfectly distracting you from Mingi cleaning your cut with his mouth. Your blood tasted unlike anything he had ever tasted before.
“You taste amazing… fuck.” Mingi mumbled against you while Yunho’s tongue slipped into your mouth as you groaned. Your mind was spinning like crazy, your hand finding place on Yunho biceps, digging your nails in his cold flesh.
“Y…Yuyu..” You tried to speak, finally making both men pull away, leaving you to gasp for air.
“Sorry tiny. Your lips were just too kissable not to.” Yunho chuckled licking his lips of the saliva you left behind on them. Your heart was pounding, feeling such excitement but also a tinge of fear…
“Tha… that was my first kiss..” You felt embarrassed to say so but you felt compelled to tell them. Which made both of them growl. Mingi’s fingers wrapped in your tattered dress hem while Yunho rubbed his hand over his face.
“Fuck. I was your first kiss baby?” Yunho felt so proud of himself.
“Damn Yunho the others aren't gonna be happy when they find out,” Mingi spoke as if you were no longer there.
“Wait why would the others care?” You suddenly felt small, seeing hunger in both their eyes. You had no idea what these men were planning, nor what they all wanted from you. It frightened you. But not as much as it excited you.
-
The bath was filled with bubbles, vanilla scent soap and soft music from a vinyl. You could have stayed in there for hours but when one of the maids came in to help you dress your wound you knew it was time to get out. The nice maid named Minnie had brought you some sleepwear, soft silk sleep shorts and a singlet. You have never felt such soft fabric before always getting hand-me-downs or second/third hand clothing.
“You look cute.” A gentle voice echoed from the door of your room. You hummed, blush burning your cheeks. Turning you see Seonghwa leaning against the door frame, bottom lip between his teeth as he eyed you, not even trying to hide that he was checking you out.
“Thanks…” You played with your fingers, standing there awkwardly as you watched Seonghwa close the door, slowly moving towards you. Like he was stalking you. No doubt Yunho and Mingi had run off bragging what they had done when you were busy bathing. God, if this was going to become a new normal you were going to develop a headache from your head spinning.
“I wanted to check on you.” For every step he took, you took one back, like a little dance until your back was firmly against the wall and his body almost flushed against you. “I heard Min and Yun had some fun with you.”
“I-..Yunho kissed me…Mingi he uh…” You felt so flustered, fanatically looking around the room feeling embarrassed about spilling what you had done even though you knew the two giants would have told everyone by now. He put his fingers on your chin, running his thumb along your bottom lip, pulling on it slightly.
“I was kinda hoping to be the first to taste you. But then again, none of the boys tend to listen.” His eyes were hooded, looking at you with such hunger. He could feel your heart race against the pad of his thumb. He can hear your blood pumping quicker than normal. And your eyes never left his. His face inched closer, and then some. Seeing just how close he could get to you before you’d pull away but you didn’t, not even flinch. “Have you done anything like this before?”
You shook your head no slightly. “Have you ever touched yourself, Bunny?” his question made your face become redder. This was filthy, dirty, something you were supposed to be sworn away. And man did defying god feel intoxicating. You whispered no, making him close his eyes with a sigh for a moment. So innocent, so cute… So his to taint. “Do you want me to touch you, Bunny?”
“Yes…” You whisper… He tucked a piece of damp hair behind your ear making you shiver as his fingers grazed your skin. His cold tips slide along your cheek, down to your neck, before pushing gently on your man artery feeling your hot blood pump under his digits.
“I could drain you dry right now. Or fuck you full? Maybe both? Hmm?” His lips brushed against yours but not enough to seal his lips on yours. No, he wanted you to do it, he needed you to do the first move. So he knows you do in fact want it. And you gave him exactly what he wanted, leaning up to lock your lips to his. His one hand cupped your face to deepen the kiss while his other, snaked down to play with the hem of your shorts. Your legs spread instinctively, giving him access to do whatever he pleases. His wet tongue danced with you making you feel all kinds of filthy.
You had almost gotten a man killed, ran away from home. Most likely been shunned for life from your village and on top of that kissed two men that both happened to be undead creatures you only just met, while another drank from one of your open wounds. If was indeed sins, you might as well be sent down to Lillith herself on a golden platter.
“Come on Bunny, let’s get you comfortable.” He pulled away picking you up by your thighs before walking over to your bed and laying you down on the plump mattress. His lips trail down your cheeks, then your jaw until he stops at your neck for a moment rubbing his nose along your jugular. “God I can smell your blood through your soft skin.” he sighs, drawing his fangs out.
“H-Hwa p-please…” You bucked your hips against his hardening length, spreading your legs further so he could get closer if that was possible. He chuckled, darkly. Fang pressing just hard enough to pierce your skin a little bit so a few drops of blood would spill out. He licked your blood up, trying not to get any on the bed sheets. Your whimpers were music to his ears, and your taste was heavenly. Now he’s wondering how else you taste in other places. “Fuuckk.”
The feeling of his fangs and the was his fingers play with your short made your head cloudy. His hand slipped into your shorts cupping your core making you suddenly aware what was happening. His mouth finally left your neck, kissing down the exposed parts of your chest. He was worshiping every part of your body sending your skin on fire. “Such a pretty bunny. I can feel heat pooling out of you. Do you find my devilish charms that intoxicating bunny?”
You squirmed, needed more. His index finger slide along your slit making your mouth open into an ‘o’ shape. Your eyes shut tightly, finally feeling some kind of relief that you were searching for. The pleasure was new, and strange, making you feel like you were in a whole another world. Seonghwa kept whispering sweet nothings to you as he slowly pushes a finger inside your drenched cunt. It was steady at first until he found a rhythm, inching yet another finger inside making your brows knot together. His name fell from your lips on repeat like some kind of broken vinyl, he knew he could get you close to your high without much effort given you have never felt such a feeling before. And with only a few more moments you were clenching around his digits, coming underdone while he stared at you intensely, watching every one of your features move and contort in the pure ecstasy he was gifting you. “Did that feel good baby? I can make you feel even better, all you got to do is say yes.”
“Yes, please Seonghwa. Please. Make me feel like that again. I wanna feel good.” You don’t know why your mouth started spilling such filth but you couldn’t care, not when you were so close to feeling a pleasure you have only wondered about in those lewd novels Miss Smith had down the path. She had let you borrow one and it had changed your life forever. Seonghwa got to work, pulling your shirt off above your head and tugging down the rest until it slipped off your ankles in one swoop of his wrists. You were completely bare for him. He could see all the sun-kissed spots. All the scars, and beauty marks. He could see the bruises of a handprint on your collarbone and other smaller ones littering your legs and arms.
Pathetic human. Digusting pig.
Fuck, does he wish that Yeosang and Hongjoong hadn’t kept him alive now. But then again giving him a swift death would have been too merciful. No, Seonghwa would want to keep Lucas in a cell, locked away for weeks. No food, barely any water. Watching him starve. Watch him beg for death. But Seonghwa would never give it to him. Lucas would welter away in the dungeon, cold, scared, and alone. Just as you felt when you were being chased by him. Just as you felt when he had put his hands on you. Seonghwa would make him pay.
“H-Hwa…” You sat on your elbows having seen the vampire's mind wander. Was he okay? Was he second-guessing his actions? Seonghwa was quick to disregard any of your fears as he shed himself off his shirt, before sliding off the bed to pull his pants down. They dropped to the floor with an audible ‘oof’. You didn't mean for your eyes to immediately gaze down at his fully grown erection but its angry red tip had caught your attention. Seonghwa didn’t mind one bit though, he admired your body in the meantime, letting you get a good look at him while he did the same to you. “That can’t fit inside me….”
Seonghwa laughed, physically laughed at your abrupt statement. “Oh don’t worry. It will.”  he yanked one of your legs making you gasp. He stood tall at the end of your bed, letting you wrap your legs around his waist. He rubbed the tip of his cock along your slit, gathering up some of your cum to use as lubricant. The whole time his eyes never left yours. He wanted to see the pleasure pooling in your eyes when he entered you inch by inch. And as you bit your bottom lip, you tried your damned hardest to keep your gaze open. “That’s it, baby. Breath…”
The stretch was painful, to say the least. Even though Seonghwa had used his fingers on you, it still wasn’t enough to fully prep you for his girth. He rubbed circles in your hips, trying to settle the pain as much as he could, noticing your fingers had entangled in the silk sheets, with your knuckles turning lightly white.
“Ffuckk, hngmm Seong.” you mumbled, finally feeling him enter you fully, his groin flush against you. He stayed still for a moment, letting you catch your breath but man was it hard. The way you clamped around him, sucked him in for more. It made him want nothing more than to pound the living shit out of you. But patience. He needed patience. And luckily out of all the boys, he owned the most patience.
“Can I move Darling?” His words were a stutter, laying with groans and sighs. You nodded your head before responding with a quick and quiet ‘please’ letting him draw his cock until only the tip was inside you then smashing back in, knocking the wind out of you. You could no longer hold yourself up, falling onto your back. Seonghwa watched as your breasts bounced in time with his thrusts and how your thighs were clamped snugly around him. You felt amazing, looked eternal. And you were finally his.
He dreamed about what your cunt might feel like wrapped around his cock. Or how might your blood taste when you are in the middle of being fucked. Firty thoughts had always seemed to riddle his mind whenever he saw you and now he could finally get the answers. But one thing is for sure. He has no idea how he is possibly going to share you with the others. When he is going to be craving you permanently.
-♥︎
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wttcsms · 4 months
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when you know, you know, atsumu miya ;
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pairing atsumu miya x f!reader word count 1k synopsis atsumu considers marriage to be a trap, until he realizes that even a lifetime commitment to you isn't long enough content contains fluff, talks of marriage!!!! he's a softie
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It starts off like this: nobody sees Atsumu Miya getting married — not now, not ever, not in the foreseeable future, nor in any of the millions of alternate and parallel universes that may or may not exist.
You’re just not the type of person we see settling down. 
Yeah, that might be true, but it still stings a little. It stings when he sees the white picket fences, and the cars with the MY KID’S AN HONOR STUDENT bumper stickers. It stings when he happens to accidentally catch a rerun of those family-centered sitcoms; the ones where they argue during the day and make up at night, with some cliche moral to the over dramatic situations that have occurred onscreen fifteen minutes ago. It stings when he watches his teammates get engaged and he has to congratulate them — he’s genuinely happy for them, don’t get him wrong — but still… 
It doesn’t matter. Atsumu Miya has long since held the firm belief that he’s just not the type of person the whole “fall in love, get married, have a family, cue the domesticity cuteness overload” schtick is meant for. Besides, it’s not like it’s something he’s spent years obsessing over (maybe months, at most). 
He rationalizes his bachelor status (that’s been a part of him for so long that it’s getting to become somewhat of a red flag for potential girlfriends) as him being the only one left with his priorities straight. After all, he doesn't have to worry about things like parent-teacher conferences or crayon drawings on the wall or trying to buy flowers to make sure the wife isn’t too mad when he comes home late. 
After all, he tells everyone, settling down is still settling. 
And Atsumu Miya, under no circumstances, ever settles.
Which is an ideal he clings to with such a tight grip, if it were flesh and blood, it would be suffocating. He doesn’t, he decides after a while, believe in marriage. 
(That is to say: he doesn’t believe that it’s possible for him. 
It’s not what he says explicitly, but it’s what he truly means.) 
So, when he tells you this on your second date, you’re a little stunned, but you’re quick to recover. Okay… So that’s the explanation you’ve been waiting for. The reason why this six feet two inches tall professional athlete with a bank account he generously withdraws money from has been single for so long is because he doesn’t believe in marriage. 
Other than that, he’s been nothing but great. Near perfect. So, all you do is nod and continue on with the original topic of the conversation. Eventually, your budding romance blooms into something much bigger than either of you ever anticipated or saw coming, and while you yourself have never mentioned the M-word after that date, it’s all Atsumu can think about right now. 
Marriage.
The concept of it looms over your relationship; a perpetual gray cloud that threatens to flood this perfect little relationship and have it all go down the drain. You never brought it up after he basically told you he would never marry anyone, and he never brought it up purely because — well — he’s a bit of a coward. 
He’s the type of person who’s set on his own convictions, by the way. If his balls ever drop, and he decides to Man Up, he figures he’ll start the conversation just like that. His stubbornness is nothing new to you, but him figuring out that he might be wrong makes his stomach feel funny. It’s sick and twisted. 
“Hey, what do you want for dinner tonight? I’m at the store right now, and I’m in the mood to cook.” He can picture it clearly: you, standing in one of the grocery store aisles, phone balanced in between your ear and shoulder as you compare the ingredients of the name brand and generic cereal. 
He’s in the locker room, about to pack up his gym bag (that you’ll complain reeks) and head back to his apartment (that’s starting to feel a lot more like yours, with the way your skincare products dominate the bathroom counter), and it hits him so suddenly, he has to sit back down on the bench. 
Atsumu Miya thinks that marriage isn’t for him, and as a defense mechanism, he decides that marriage sucks anyway. But through the tinny speakers of his phone, he can hear you toss something in the shopping cart. He hears the faint crying of a toddler in the background, and then he starts to think about what it would be like to walk around the store with a baby that takes after you. Right now, you’re already sleeping in the same bed with him at least four times out of the week, but it would be perfect, he thinks, to get the privilege to wake up to you every morning.
“Atsumu?” You try to get his attention, and Atsumu tries to ignore the warm and fuzzy feeling he gets when he considers a future with you. Settling down is still settling, he tells himself, and then he thinks of the way you looked when you caught the bouquet at a friend’s wedding. The pleased smile on your face, the triumphant way you held the flowers over your head, head thrown back in glee; you looked absolutely radiant. You caught his eye, and you quickly lowered your hands, giving him a sheepish grin. 
He realizes now that if anyone is settling, it’s you. You don’t know that he notices the way you tear up at weddings, or how excited you sound when you get back from dress shopping with one of your friends. You want to get married, and the only thing stopping you is him.
He’s spent ages deluding himself into thinking that he’s somehow losing if he decides to trap himself into a marriage with someone, but no one can accuse him of settling when it’s you he’s marrying. You’re the prize. You’re the only person in the world he wants to give his last name and an obnoxiously big ring to. 
“Make whatever you want, baby. I’ll eat anything.” He’s checking the locations for the nearest jewelers in his immediate vicinity. “I might be a little late, though. I have to check on something.” 
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prettieinpink · 6 months
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MAKING FRIENDS ♡
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Friends add so much value to your life. Especially ones that you like, and there is a positive healthy exchange of support and love in between. However, some of us do struggle to create meaningful friendships that last. To start this post, I will start by talking about how friendships are essential to becoming the best versions of ourselves. 
Friends help us in many ways, even if they don’t even do it directly. We discover new things about ourselves just by talking to them, we have a sense of belonging and build our self-esteem. It’s not impossible to have these things and be alone, though being alone for extended periods can fester feelings of social isolation & loneliness. 
As someone who’s experienced both, usually, these feelings can make us spiral deeper as it is just the tip of the iceberg. Humans need daily communication to feel sane, which has been proven again and again. 
If you decide to invest a lot more time, effort, and energy in friends, there’s bound to be an overflowing amount of rewards. Hanging around the right people can open up new opportunities for yourself drive you closer to achieving your goals and help advance your skills. 
This being said, if you invest in the wrong people or neglect your friends, the opposite will more than likely happen. Remember that the people you allow in your life can influence you, whether for better or worse. 
REDEFINING YOUR MINDSET TOWARDS MAKING FRIENDS 
Your mindset is so crucial to making friends. It can either help you or not. Another thing is that your mindset towards life, in general, can either repel or attract people to be around you. 
Firstly and importantly, do not get attached to people you barely know. Don’t overthink about them, change yourself for them or get anxious waiting for a reply. Seriously, detach. Little things like replies or if they’ll like you, should not bother you. The concept of it bothering you should not even exist in your mind. 
Secondly, do not think of humans as assets to support your growth. This is just so icky and once you get that materialistic perspective on friendships, it just becomes harder to create meaningful ones. While friends can help you grow and achieve your goals, they will drop you once they realise they’re being taken advantage of. 
Thirdly, stay true to yourself. A bit of common advice, yet not widely followed. Never, ever, make the effort to change yourself for someone to like you a bit better. If someone doesn’t like you for just who you are, they’re not meant to be in your life, forcing it causes unnecessary & avoidable circumstances.
Fourthly, quality over quantity always. When you get older especially, it shouldn’t be your priority to gain masses of friends. Most likely, not all of your friends like you because it’s harder to invest in all of them and causes you to neglect them. 
However, having quality friends who help you grow and succeed will never stop serving you in life even if that friendship falls out. Plus, you are too busy achieving your goals every day to entertain everyone you know. 
Lastly, do not allow disrespect just because you’re friends. They will test the waters to see how much you can tolerate, then you allow them to, they’re just going to get more extreme with it. Identify disrespect in ‘jokes’ or casual conservation and call it out. These people are praying for your downfall. 
That being said, just because it is not happening to you, don’t allow it. Once you establish yourself as only wanting respect, you’re going to get treated like it. 
DEFINING YOUR INNER AND OUTER CIRCLE 
Your inner circle consists of people whom you are close to, and have healthy and positive relations with them. These are the kind of people who you’d go to for emotional support or to celebrate great successes in your life. 
Then, you have your outer circle. These can be people who you’re close to, but they’re not the closest. It consists of people who you talk to regularly, but there’s still that distance. Distance is not a bad thing at all in friendships, not everyone is meant to be your closest friend.
Now those two terms are established, I want you to visualise how you want those two circles to look. These can be people who you want to be friends with, wanting to cut anyone off or just people who you hope to meet one day. 
Then define how you want to feel with those two circles, like a loving or caring circle, or a growth and learning circle. This is completely up to you, about how those circles feel and look like as it is for you. 
I recommend writing your visualisations down and putting them somewhere you can see regularly. This is just to help us get into the energy of making meaningful friendships every day.
STANDARDS + CRITERIA IN FRIENDS 
The heading is a little bit off-putting, I understand. However, it is essential to establish a set of standards once you start making friends. This is to make sure you’re making quality friendships, and not attaching to just anyone. 
This is a bit of individual advice, you have to curate your standards by yourself. A personal example is that I’m Christian myself, I believe in God and I’m devoted to him. 
So, in that case, I won’t allow other religions or non-religious people into my inner circle. While they can be in my outer circle, I would prefer having most of my friends believe in God and uphold his values. 
Standards and criteria in friends can either be a must quality (they must have this quality) or a preferred quality (I prefer if they did, don’t mind if they don’t). You decide which qualities are which, and if they apply to your inner or outer circle. 
Can’t say much, but to help you, I advise looking into yourself internally and once again, visualising what those friendships look like daily. To help, I’ve gathered a few journaling prompts!
 What do you think are the responsibilities of friendship?
What is the nicest thing a friend could ever do for you? 
What do you think friendship is?
How do you expect the aftermath to be after an argument with a friend?
How can someone become a part of your inner circle? 
What behaviour makes you want to cut someone off?
Who were your favourite friends in the past? What did they do to become your favourite?
How would you like to be shown appreciation daily? 
Do you like banter or prefer showering each other with compliments? 
Then, extract from your responses to these prompts, some characteristics or traits that you look for in friendships. 
BECOMING SOCIALLY ELOQUENT The first tip i’m going to give to you is to read. Not just in your head, but out loud reading. Read, and see if you’re going too fast or too slow, you’re pronouncing words clearly and know when to pause. Bonus points if you record yourself reading, then rewatch it to see your progress. 
Search up any words you don’t know and how to pronounce them, and to test yourself, think of a way to use those words in an everyday sentence. 
While this helps to expand your vocabulary as well, really keep in mind the setting of the conservation. If you’re at a science and math invention fair, more advanced language is suited. However, you wouldn’t use that same way of speaking casually at a party. 
The second tip is to get rid of all filler words in your vocabulary. 
Like
Um
Uh
so
Unnecessary when speaking and it can make you an unengaging conservationist. Just take a pause when thinking, and if you forget what you were talking about, tell your listener or just change the topic. Sometimes, these words are needed when speaking, but not all the time. 
The third tip is just to do everything slower, while speaking. Move your hands slower, don’t dart your eyes around and take deep breaths before speaking. If not, you seem anxious and jittery, in which your words will not be clear. 
The fourth tip is to pay attention to the listener. Make eye contact with them and ask questions about them too. This makes it a lot more engaging and therefore, easier for the listener to listen. 
My fifth tip, and the most important, is to practice speaking. Whether it is in front of a mirror or with a partner. Use notes as reminders while practising to help you remember what to do. There are even videos on YouTube where you can pretend you’re having a conversation with someone, or you could just make your own. 
However, practice yourself to speak without preparation. Like for example, you strike up a conservation with your classmate and apply the things you’ve learnt. 
Bear in mind, that the whole point of becoming socially eloquent isn’t to make people listen to you, but to make it easier for people to listen to you. 
MAKING FRIENDS + KEEPING THEM
Now everything else is out of the way, let’s talk about what you probably came here for. How to make friends and keep them. Better said than done. 
The settings where you meet someone are important. It allows you to easily connect with people who are similar to you in any way, without actually having to state it. Here are a few places to meet people.
Church/any religious site (same beliefs)
Sports club (like that sport/exercise) 
Any classes (people who like learning/that hobby) 
School or university (you’ve got something to connect over) 
These are just a few examples of where to meet people, however, you do not have to go somewhere else just to meet someone. Sometimes, I go to my nearest shopping mall or supermarket either after school or on the weekend and talk to any girls who look around my age, with whom I’ve gained so many friends. 
While going to a particular setting helps to find people with similarities, it’s not the essential piece to meet people. 
If you struggle to make friends just by striking up a conversation, just make yourself known to others first. Help them when needed, compliment them or greet them daily. They will most likely approach you first and talk to you first as you’ve deemed yourself approachable. Do not rely on this method though, not everyone is willing to approach you. 
Once you find a potential friend and you’re talking to them, make sure it’s an engaging conversation. First, ask open-ended questions. Open-ended questions are ones that someone can expand on, basically not yes or no answers. 
Do you own any cats? -> What’s your favourite cat breed? 
Do you enjoy *activity*? -> What’s your favourite thing to do after school? 
When can we hang out? -> Where’s your favourite place to hang out?
These are the kinds of questions that you get to know someone and are engaging. Remember, do not be overbearing with questions, it can come off as kinda odd. 
Secondly, find any similarities and talk about them. For example, a sport, a favourite book, a hobby, religion. It is so easy for people to connect over their favourite things. 
Thirdly, have open and friendly body language. Smile when they’re talking, maintain eye contact, avoid crossing your arms and legs, and lean in to show you’re listening. People love love, good listeners. 
My fourth point which refers back to being good listeners, is remembering what they say. If they said, oh I love going to the beach, maybe suggest going to the beach together. Or, they said, I hate studying, then the next time they have a test, help them study. 
Lastly, avoid small talk. It becomes awkward and the answers are always the same. If you must, ask them about things that happened in their life. Like, how’s that boy you’re talking to or did you do well on that test? 
Most people also hate small talk. So, if every single conservation is just small talk, they would not want to talk to you. 
These little things that you remember can make people like you and therefore, want to be your friend. I remember stuff about people by just writing it down and occasionally referring back to it. 
Now, let’s say you’ve got your friend now. However, you don’t have a way of talking to them every day. They don’t live close by nor do they attend your school/uni/any place. So, how do we keep them?
Easy, invest in those friendships. Talk to them via messages or phone, schedule days to hang out, check up on them to make sure they’re doing well, be honest with them, remember important dates of their lives etc. 
Keeping friends is just about being a good friend to them. Just think about how you would like to get treated by your friends and treat them like that. Even if they don’t reciprocate, putting out those positive actions, will come back to you one day. 
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haunted-xander · 2 months
Text
Shadowbringers is about learning how to live.
Your enemy is stasis- everything and everyone is stagnant, they wait and wait for something to happen, but don't do anything to make it so (because the ones who tried before failed, because they don't know what to do/how to do it). People don't change, they don't try, not really. The crystarium is doing well, it's independent and sustainable, but it doesn't have the reach or power to do much outside of Lakeland. The Exarch is more-or-less confined to the city (because of the tower, because he's waiting for you), so even if he had power elsewhere, he'd be limited with how much he, personally, can do.
Eulemore is filled with mindless indulgence, there's no hardships or labour or anything but luxury for the free citizens, and the bonded only have to worry about fulfilling the task(s) they were brought for. The outside world doesn't matter, hard work doesn't matter, personal fulfillment beyond indulgence doesn't matter, everything exist solely in the moment. The people out in Kholusia have pretty much given up, they stay close to the city in the hopes that this time they will be picked, this time they will be saved. They wait and wait and do nothing but wait. The ones who try to live on are dying out or eventually give up and join the rest in waiting.
Ahm Areang, Rak'tika, even Il Mheg are all just waiting for something, anything to happen. They go day to day, surviving simply because it's all they can. Nothing changes.
Until, of course, you should up. You, who causes a ripple of change simply by existing, who can move the immovable by sheer will. You showed them that things can change, that things can, and will happen, if they just try. You show them that they can make things better, that there is an option besides waiting for a slow death, if they'd just grab fate by the neck and tell it "No. We are doing this my way".
And they do. They rally up together and do what they thought impossible. Not all their efforts succeed(not immediately), but they tried. They tried, they failed, and they got up and tried again and again until it did work. They take the chances, not knowing how it'll turn out (because it's not about whether it fails or succeeds, it's about having tried).
They learn how to try, little by little, and every step they learn what it means to really live.
Endwalker is about learning how to love life.
Your enemy is nihilism- the idea that nothing matters, that there is no real joy to be found that isn't snuffed out by misery. A concept that denounces greys in favor of a black-and-white view where black is all encompassing. Everywhere you go, people are doing what they can to survive, but refuses (or maybe are afraid to, or maybe never knew they could) try to actually save themselves. The Forum plans for escape, to leave their homeworld behind and take whatever they can afford. They will live on, but they won't be saved, no one is saved(and even with escape they aren't safe, Despair is everywhere and She will not stop until all has become Nothing).
The Loporrits love Etheirys, but in the way Winter loves Spring. They know about it, they are so close to it, but they are distant. They're strangers, they've never met. It's love, and it's pure and true, but it's also just love. It's surface-level(because the surface is all they had). Their love is pure but it's instinctual. Programmed. They love because they don't know how to not love. They want to save it's people, save us, but they don't know what it really means to save, so they create refuge instead(because that's what She told them to, because this is how love works for them).
The people of Garlemald are terrified, they are victims of extreme indoctrination, the (deserved) push-back their army got proved them "right"(that we are savage beasts to fear, that they are but prey in the maws of rabid dogs). They want to be build-up again, but what's left for them now? The world hates them(and it's all their fault, the ones who see past the propaganda know this, but who will listen to them?) and they are dying. It's so cold and the fuel is running out. They won't accept help, because they've been filled with the idea that there is no such thing as pure kindness from "savages"(and they are too prideful to question it, to break apart from the illusion that they are surperior, because they're terrified to face the truth).
The sky screams, the earth wheeps and the foundation of existence is overtaken by Despair, misery is around every corner and who knows what will happen now? Where do we go? What do we do? We live and live but for what?
What's the point of it all?
That's the question, and the answer is everything. We live because there is joy to be found. Because there is beauty in the world. Because there are stars in the sky. Because flowers bloom in spring. Because cats purr. Because waves crash against the shore. Because of every single little thing we can see, hear or feel. Because we love and are loved. Because there are things to do and discover. Because why not?
And you tell them this, by letting them see that there is more to life than the little they have seen. The Forum has closed it's eyes to anything but it's own kith and kin, everything outside of Old Sharlayan is irrelevant(non-intervention, always non-intervention) and it takes the entire world coming and telling them "We are here. We are alive, and we will make tomorrow happen." for them to realize they have slowly been killing themselves and what they stand for(you pride yourself on knowledge, but where is your wisdom? What do you truly know of things outside your own bubble? You do not know that which is lived because you refuse to aknowledge anything but the written word).
The Loporrits see Etheirys itself, they experience it's corners and valleys and learn what love can really be. They want to save it, truly save it, because they love and this time it's informed, it's personal(I love you, I love you, and I want you to know I love your loves too).
In Garlemald everything is slow, unsteady and complicated, but it's changing. They're changing. With every person who accepts help the illusion of supremacy and "purity" melts away just a bit, and the wall standing between them and us breaks a little(it will never vanish completely, years upon years of oppression and subjugation and conquest don't disappear like that, but it's a start).
Shadobringers is about learning how to live, but Endwalker is about learning how to love life.
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goddessofmischief · 6 months
Note
Hey, thanks for tagging :) I am 34, so the "old men" are not so old to me and quite frankly, watching Shanks, Buggy and Mihawk in OPLA is feeling like coming home to old friends back from 20 years ago. (I was crushing on Shanks and Buggy so much...😅) So I thought, maybe you could write something where fem!reader already knows them and has a soft spot for each of them, since back when they were flirting and making fun when they were young. Now as adults they meet again and the chemistry is still there.
I remember one of my stories from back then. I was jealous of mermaids, because all the pirates got stupid once they're around, and a drunk Shanks said: "nah, you wouldn't like to be one; You'd be missing slamming doors and Buggy would drown on daily basis just to say hi-." Both Buggy and Reader: "shut up! So not true!". Just like young stupids are... :)
Anyways, thanks for your writing and I can't wait to read more about the "get-shit-done"-squad Mihawk, Shanks and Buggy
     — MERMAIDS (YOUNG SHANKS X READER, YOUNG BUGGY X READER)
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A/N: Hope this is alright: since your formal request was so in line with what the theme of the series will be anyway, I used the excerpt of your line as basis for this particular fic. All credit of course goes to you for coming up with the lines and the idea. On a personal note, I just want to say how much I respect that you were an OG fic writer and still have interest in and love for these characters. Welcome home.
...
You would have believed that you had been at sea for years, until Buggy reminded you that it had only been weeks.
Granted, this is how he reminded you:
"It's been wee-eks," Buggy whined, stretching out on his hammock. Shanks was collapsed against the wall, fingers knotted together, eyes not really focused on any particular place.
And you? You were lying on the floor, gazing up at the wooden ceiling, wondering if it would be a good idea to leave the cabin and see the stars.
Being on the ship for weeks was highly irregular for your crew. Great captain he was, Roger knew he could only keep this ragtag group sane if they stepped onto shore and ate an orange every once in awhile. This concern was triply inflated by the fact that he had three young adults onboard who became very antsy if they had to stay in one place for too long. Your patience certainly rivaled Buggy's or even Shanks', but even you had your limit, and you had met it long ago.
The ship would have planned to make port nearly a week before, but the World Government was closer to finding you than ever. It was simply too dangerous.
You soon learned how your friends reacted to a situation such as this. Shanks had retreated mostly into silence, with exception of the odd joke or attempt at conversation, and Buggy had decided he blamed you both somehow for this situation and that any words exchanged with either of you would only be of the complaining nature.
"I know, Bugs," said Shanks, and you were surprised to hear him answer Buggy's complaint. You exchanged glances with him, then turned back to Buggy.
"Let's go outside, yeah?" you suggested. "Do something fun."
"Everyone's outside," Buggy complained. "They've been yelling over something for hours."
"And you didn't think that was important to mention, Bugs?" Shanks asked, irritably. Buggy shrugged.
...
The thing that had sparked such interest in the crew was simply that, as your ship had sailed very far into the deepest waters, much farther than usual, you had sailed into a home of mermaids. Extremely dangerous, and the crew knew it.
It did not negate their interest whatsoever, though.
Pirates get stupid when mermaids are around. It is a core trait of pirates and no less than a sacred tenet of piracy itself. More than a few decent men have been seduced to the sea by the very concept of mermaids, and to that end, the idea of finding one.
Shanks and Buggy were no exception.
You had never really taken the care to notice how they behaved with girls. Their flirting was of no interest to you, and so you didn't bother to surveil it. But it came to your attention now that they had terribly different styles: namely, that Buggy was mostly content to sit and watch from the edge of the deck, and Shanks was more interested in yelling, waving, and nearly falling off the boat.
Granted, by this time, alcohol had become involved, and all bets were off.
Despite all the excitement, the first in weeks, Shanks had begun to notice how quiet you'd become. He approached you, somewhat cautiously, hoping you wouldn't react with a retort or a threat.
"You okay?"
You nodded, staring at the drink you held.
"You sure?"
You shrugged, whispering something under your breath that Shanks struggled to hear.
"What's that?"
You spoke again, slightly more than a whisper, but Shanks heard it all the same.
"...I wish I was a mermaid."
"You wish you were a mermaid?" He repeated loudly, almost outraged. You shushed him, and he just laughed.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, it's just... nah, you wouldn't like to be one. You'd be missing... slamming doors, and Buggy would drown himself on a daily basis just to say hi-"
"Shut up!" you giggled. "So not true!"
"And then, of course, there'd be all the pirates. I wouldn't like sharing you with them."
"I'm a pirate. You're a pirate."
"I'm a different sort of pirate. And you're barely a pirate at all."
You shrank back, inexplicably hurt by Shanks' drunken offhand insult.
"I'm as much of a pirate as you."
"Of course you are. I didn't mean that. Not like that. I mean, you're just... you're very careful, you're much too good for us. You're not messy or mean like the rest of us are."
"What do you think I am, then?"
"A princess," he blurted out, and you tried not to laugh. "I've always thought so."
"Always?"
"Mhm. The whole time."
You studied Shanks' face, seeing him in a new light that you'd never glimpsed anyone in before. Had he always been this cute, or charming, or kind?
Well, it didn't matter if he always had been, because he was now, and before you had given much thought to it at all you were pushing his straw hat back and he was meeting your lips in a kiss, your first, his first.
"You're a terribly nice pirate," you mumbled.
"You're a terribly beautiful princess," he replied.
You both parted awkwardly, staring at each other with confused half-smiles and resigning to focusing your attentions back on the ocean. For now, it was merely a strange evening, a shooting star, but later on, you would remember that night as the precise moment you began to love Red-Haired Shanks.
And Buggy, watching from across the ship, would remember that night as the second time a deep knot of resentment grew in his chest, one that would only become larger with time. The first time had been as a child, when Shanks had done something exceptionally well where Buggy had failed, and Roger placed his famous straw hat onto his head.
The second time was tonight, because of you.
taglist: @sawendel @twinklesnake
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nebulousbrainsoup · 11 months
Text
business attire
PAIRING: fashion designer/director!kim hongjoong x assistant!reader GENRE: smut with feelings, lil bit of fluff TAGS/WARNINGS: non idol au, neutral pronouns used for reader, reader wears a dress (but in true joong fashion clothes have no gender), balmain!joong AND strawberry!joong, mentions of anxiety, hongjoong is a simp, pov shifts a lil, ash's questionable editing; lmk if you find anything else! WORD COUNT: 4.5k A/N: so, we were trying to figure out when the outlaw red hair concept photos may have been taken and sky might've mentioned that the cut looks like what he had before the european leg of tour and paris and balmain and... things escalated. tagging my enablers: @hwaightme @jaehunnyy @justhere4kpop
nsfw tags under the cut ; masterlist | join my taglist | buy me a coffee?
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NSFW TAGS/WARNINGS: language, they're both switches, reader has female anatomy, mildly public sex (locked conference room), brief dom/sub undertones, sex with your boss is kind of its own form of power play, mentions of punishment, use of pet/nicknames (babe, Balmain Boy, sweetheart, love), hair pulling, marking, joong is possessive, dirty talk, lil bit of degradation, oral (fem receiving), unprotected sex (wrap it b4 u tap it homies), piv, finger sucking/fingers as a gag, creampie; lmk what i missed
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You were so late. It wasn’t like you in the slightest, so you were hoping against hope that your boss would let it slide this once, but… fifteen minutes behind and counting for the monthly investors’ meeting was certainly pushing your luck and probably his patience. You wish you could say it was entirely not your fault, but you were the one who had both forgotten to set your alarm last night and postponed laundry long enough that, when you spilled your coffee down the front of you this morning, you were left with only two options; either your pyjamas, or the unreleased piece currently hanging on the back of your door, reserved for S(e)oul Monde’s summer release show next week. The wave of anxiety over Hongjoong’s reaction took an extra five minutes to tamp down, and by the time you’d finally figured out the clasps and sashes—having been reminded why models had dressers—you had five minutes to get out the door if you were going to catch your train. You managed it, if barely, yanking on your boots and snagging your workbag from by the door, barely stopping to lock it behind you. 
And, of course, you’d made it into the station in time to watch the damned thing pull away. Of all the days for it to be actually on time, of course it was today. Fantastic. The bus had been the only option, and between the walk back up to the street and the distance between the nearest stop and S(e)oul Monde headquarters… You’d known this would be the outcome. It didn’t stop you from trying to close as much of the gap in time as possible, though. The moment you were seated, leg bouncing feverishly, you’d sent a message to your boss, apologizing and letting him know you were on your way. 
You’d known it would go unread, but that didn’t stop the irritation that bubbled up at the sight as the bus pulled into your stop. Flying through the doors and up the stairs as quickly as you could, you gave tight smiles and murmured apologies to the coworkers you nearly trampled in your rush to the elevator. The disgruntled sounds of its occupants and those waiting echoed as you wormed your way in, a quick, scathing glare around quietling them as you pressed the button for the tenth floor. With only two stops between you and your destination, you were slipping into the conference room seventeen minutes behind schedule, tablet clutched to your chest as all eyes turned from the man speaking to the door. You immediately dropped into a ninety degree bow, apologizing profusely as you shuffled toward your seat, dropping your bag into it and taking your place. 
Hongjoong, like everyone else in the room, had looked at you the moment you entered the room, but unlike the investors, he couldn’t seem to drag his gaze away from you. His surroundings faded to a blur as you made your way to stand next to him, the breath having been knocked from his lungs. The dress was perfect, exactly as he knew it would be—a little short for a traditional office, certainly; he’d seen a few eyebrows raise at your entrance—and on you, of all people, it looked immaculate, like it had been designed specifically with you in mind. Which, well…
Every artist has a muse. Hongjoong wouldn’t be apologizing, especially not when you looked that good in his work. 
It was your voice that pulled Hongjoong out of his stupor. 
“I’m sorry for my lateness and the interruption, sir. Please, continue.”
He snapped back into himself, blinking rapidly and offering you a soft smile. “Right.”
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When he had finished with his presentation and you both sat back down, Hongjoong at the head of the table and you to his left, you finally let yourself relax. The way he’d stared you down over the tops of his glasses as you made your whirlwind entrance hadn’t slipped past your notice, leaving anxiety coiling in your gut, alongside something entirely more exciting. It was no secret to either you or your boss that you each found the other wildly attractive, and the combination of his intense gaze on you earlier and the way he looked today had memories flashing through your mind that were entirely inappropriate for the workplace. He always dressed up a bit more for these meetings, but today, he’d really gone above and beyond. The custom, black velvet Balmain suit he wore made his freshly dyed red hair look even brighter, and it took a stunning amount of self-control to keep from leaning over and taking the chain connecting his lip ring to one of his many earrings between your teeth. All in good time, you supposed, if the way he was looking at you earlier was any indication. Sure enough, as he slid his chair under the conference table, a warm hand settled on your knee, and the chill of the various rings adorning it nearly made you jump. Feeling you twitch, Hongjoong peeled his eyes from the man speaking to flash you a slightly worried glance. You returned it with a slight smile and a nearly imperceptible nod, earning a quick squeeze to your leg. The touch had your shoulders relaxing further, a silent sigh passing your lips—he wasn’t mad at you. Wearing the dress had been a gamble, and if the intensity in his gaze hadn’t been anger, then it was something not entirely different but far more fun. You smiled to yourself as you turned back to face the man speaking once more. All of that anxiety, for nothing.
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Or, maybe not, because the second your eyes left the woman who had, at this point, been speaking for fifteen minutes straight, running an increasingly frustrated Hongjoong in circles, you felt his grip tighten. Your jaw twitched, and you carefully brought your gaze back to hers, feigning interest to the best of your ability as his fingers danced lightly up the inside of your thigh. 
“Y/N, could you run Ms. Lim through the timeline one more time, please,” he sighed, a tight smile on his face. 
“Of course,” you agreed with a similar look, only slightly less obvious in your annoyance, once again flipping your tablet open. Clicking through a few things, you cast your sceen to the TV on the wall and stood, making your way to stand beside it. Hongjoong’s eyes followed you the whole way, eyes wandering over the bits of skin his work left deliciously exposed. He couldn’t wait to kiss his way up your thighs, to tug the sashes criss-crossing over your back free and run his hands across the plane of it, to sink his teeth into the curve of your shoulder and make you look that much more his. You once again caught his narrowed gaze over the invisible frames of his glasses, a smirk tugging at his lips that nearly had you weak in the knees. You knew that look all too well; it was both a threat and a promise. 
Maintaining an air of complete professionalism with Hongjoong staring at you like he was ready to devour you was a feat you’d be thanking some god or another for later, but right now, you simply bowed and took your seat once more as you finished your quick presentation and returned to your place next to your boss, standing over his shoulder rather than taking your seat. 
“If something is still unclear, feel free to send me an email, but we are a bit over time and Mr. Kim has another appointment over his lunch,” you stated with a polite smile, pointedly ignoring the confused look Hongjoong momentarily shot you. “I think it would be best if we wrapped up for the day, in interest of everyone’s time.”
God, he could kiss you. He would kiss you, he decided; he’d kiss you breathless the moment he got you alone for this.
Ms. Lim pursed her lips, but the look in your eyes left no room for argument. After all, who knew the S(e)oul Monde director’s schedule better than his assistant? She nodded, pushing her chair back, and the rest of your restless company followed. “I certainly will.”
“As always, thank you all for your continued support of S(e)oul Monde, and I hope my work continues to exceed your lofty expectations,” Hongjoong offered as he stood. “Thank you for your time. I hope to see you all at our showcase next week.”
The men and women in the room murmured their own parting pleasantries, phones returning to hands and bluetooths returning to ears as they filed into the hall, leaving you and your boss alone. Only a beat of silence passed before he turned to you, heat burning behind his eyes as they flicked over you hungrily. 
“Lock the door and close the blinds.” Your low-burning nerves and arousal were both lit ablaze again at his direction, and you stuttered. He raised an eyebrow, tongue darting out to toy with the lip ring you so desperately wanted a taste of. “Don’t make me ask twice.”
The warning snapped you out of your stupor in a moment, and you paused only to set your tablet on the table before rushing to comply. His gaze was warm on the back of your neck as you moved through the room, first clicking the lock shut, then moving to drop the shades on the frosted windows that faced the hall, and finally crossing the room to do the same with the exterior windows. When you reached for the controls, Hongjoong clicked his tongue disapprovingly, the noise pinning you in place. 
“Leave those. Look at me, Y/N.” 
Swallowing thickly, you did as you were told, chin held high. “Yes?”
“You were late this morning,” he commented off-handedly as he stood, and you dropped your eyes to the floor.
“I’m sorry, everything just—” you started, only to be cut off.
“Was this little number,” he gestured to the dress, using the chance to give you another once-over, “the reason?”
“Part of it, but—”
This time, it wasn’t his words that cut you off, but his lips as he lifted your chin and dragged you into a kiss that told you exactly how long he'd been waiting to do this. You squeaked in surprise and quickly melted into him, one hand clutching at the asymmetrical neckline of his suit tightly as the other grasped at the base of his skull in an attempt to pull him impossibly closer. With a sigh, your lips parted against his, tongue darting out to finally get a taste of the brand new jewelry you'd been eyeing the entire meeting. The metallic tang pulled a pleased hum from you as you took it between your teeth, shifting to catch more of his lip than the jewelry itself as you pulled away.
“This is so not business attire, babe,” he breathed against your lips, and you laughed quietly into his mouth as he captured them again.
“Are you telling me I can’t—mm—wear your designs to the office?” You teased between kisses, finally pressing him away from you. 
Hongjoong rolled his eyes heartily, his own half-smile giving away the feigned nature of his annoyance. “Not all of them, no,” he sighed, hands coming to rest over your ass, pulling you into him and groping at it lightly. “You know better than that. And one that isn’t even released yet?” He clicked his tongue again. “I was going to forgive you for being late since you look this good, but maybe I should punish you after all.”
You frowned, pulling away from him slightly as your earlier anxiety washed over you again, and Hongjoong wanted nothing more than to take his words back. “It… This was the only thing I had clean, I spilled coffee on myself this morning and I—”
“Y/N, it’s okay, I promise,” he soothed, shifting closer to you and squeezing at your hips in a way he hoped was reassuring. “If it weren’t, I could’ve asked you to change. It’s not like we don’t have clothes in every size you could ever need.” 
“That’s… true,” you muttered, tugging your lower lip between your teeth.
Hongjoong hummed in distaste of the action, reaching up with one hand to pull the skin free and immediately planting a chaste kiss where his thumb had just been. “You just look… too good,” he murmured, grip on you tightening. “This may be my best work yet.” It was your turn to roll your eyes, scoffing as you tried and failed to push him away from you. “And yours may be getting me out of that meeting.”
“How do you know you don’t have an appointment over lunch?” You grinned, ever unable to pass up a chance to tease him. “I know you haven’t checked your schedule since this morning and—mmph!” 
For the second time in the past five minutes, he cut you off with a heated kiss. “Oh, I know I have a lunch appointment,” he shot back, spinning you and guiding you backward until your hips hit the edge of the table. “And we both know it’s with you. Up,” he directed, tapping your thigh twice. 
With a little hop and loose guidance from Hongjoong’s hands, you boosted yourself up onto the edge of the table, your boss following behind quickly to spread your knees with his own body. He couldn’t get enough of your lips today, it seemed, wrapping one arm around your waist as the other came to rest on the surface behind you, forcing an arch into your back. You let out a pleased hum against him, reaching up to card a hand up over his scalp and give his hair a light tug. The action pulled a groan from his lips as he leaned back into the contact, and when his eyes blinked back open, the predatory look he pinned you with sent electricity coursing through your veins. 
You met his fire with a burning challenge of your own, tugging harsher on your fistful of red and grinning wickedly as a throaty groan left the man’s mouth. “You,” he hissed, grabbing ahold of your wrist and tugging it free from its home, “drive me fucking insane.”
“Ditto, Balmain Boy,” you shot back, and you reveled for a moment in the shine of the smirk on his face, before it disappeared into the crook of your neck.
Little pleased sounds fell freely from your mouth as his worked its way down your throat, kissing and nipping at the skin, never enough to mark—although, you knew if you let him, Hongjoong would jump at the opportunity, jealous as he was—and he closed his eyes, basking in every single one. The hand around your waist shifted to splay out against your back, the warmth of his palm in contrast to the cool metal of his rings making you shiver again, and you felt him grinning against your skin for a beat before sinking his teeth into your shoulder. You choked back a sharp cry at the sudden action, grasping at his velvet suit.
“Hongjoong,” you hissed in warning, the last syllable coming out whinier than you would have liked. In your regular attire, anything below the neck was fair game for him to mar as he pleased. But between the safety pins holding together the strap on the side he was currently working over and the mesh of the other, you were working with far less coverage than usual. He let out a low noise akin to a growl at your protest, pulling a choked-off yelp from you, before soothing over the angry skin with his tongue. 
“Joong,” you tried again, and this time let it be a whimper. “Careful.”
“Who cares,” he muttered, pressing a quick kiss to the blooming mark before letting his lips trail across the collar of your dress. “Let them know.”
You squirmed, a quiet whine leaving you as heat struck through you at his words. “We… we can’t,” you protested weakly.
Hongjoong let out a low, dark giggle. “You don’t sound sure, sweetheart. You want people to know you’re fucking your boss?” Another whine, this one more frustrated than the last. “Nasty,” he chastised, but you could hear the grin in his voice. He got off on the thought more than you did, the possessive shit.
Straightening up, he pressed one more quick kiss to your lips before just as abruptly dropping to his knees in front of you. The action made you wince—not for the man in front of you, but for the pants he was wearing. You carded a hand into his hair again as you groaned in protest, tugging on it to force him to look up at you. “You’re gonna wear out the knees on th—”
“Worth it,” he shrugged, fingers immediately sliding under the hem of your skirt, kneading at your thighs. The moment they found the hem of your underwear, his hands slid smoothly from the outside of them in, fingertips dancing teasingly over your clothed core. He smiled up at you as you squirmed under his attention, the expression spreading to his signature smirk as he pressed harder and pulled a low moan from you.
“Get on with it, we don’t have all day,” you breathed, tugging lightly on his hair again. The sight of his eyes rolling back in his head—an exaggeration, sure, but you wouldn’t be complaining—sent heat rushing to your core again, the muscles in your thighs twitching as they tried to close around Hongjoong’s hands. 
The look he gave you was one you immediately wanted to wipe off of his face. “We do if you’ll clear my schedule,” he quipped back, earning a harsher yank to his hair, this time in the direction of your body.
“Put your mouth to better use, Kim Hongjoong.”
The second the words left your mouth, his fingers were hooking into the waistband of your underwear, and you lifted your hips off the table. In one fluid motion, he’d tugged the fabric free from your legs and left your skirt bunched around your waist, exposing you to his increasingly hungry gaze. Tossing his glasses onto the table beside you and throwing your legs over his shoulders, he pressed kisses up the inside of one of your thighs, breath barely ghosting over your center as he switched to the other. Annoyed, you tried to pull him where you wanted him, earning a breathy little laugh for your efforts. 
“Ask nicely, babe,” he muttered, pausing his work just long enough to properly look up at you.
His dick twitched in his pants at the sight. You stared down at him with half-lidded, pleading eyes and parted lips, lust clouding over your face. The neckline of your dress was still askew from where he’d pulled it aside, the skirt hiked up and now balled in your hand to give you a better view of him. And just as his eyes drifted lower, landing on your glistening heat, you breathed out a quiet, breathless, “Please.”
Who was he to deny his muse when they looked so breathtaking?
A weak, weak man. Weak for you, for everything you gave him and everything you let him take from you. Weak for the way you looked in his designs, in your own clothes, in a burlap sack, probably. Weak for the way you looked commanding the office—the whole operation would fall apart without you, and if Hongjoong were being honest with himself, he’d go with it. Weak for the way you tasted—your lips, your skin, your cunt; he’d drown in you if you would let him. 
And now, mere minutes after you’d saved him from the most boring meeting of his life; a few short hours after you’d strutted into the office in the piece he’d made for you, he was going to try whether you let him or not.
Biting back your moans while he ate you out like a starved man was a feat you didn’t think possible until you achieved it, muffling all but the quietest little whimpers and gasps as your orgasm coiled in your core. The closer you got, the harder it became, and the hand in Hongjoong’s hair left it in favor of clamping over your mouth. He growled against you in protest, the sensation making your thighs twitch, and wrapped his lips around your clit. With a few harsh sucks and practiced flicks of his tongue, you were clamping down around him, muffling the squeaks of pleasure he so desperately wished to hear.
You tugged him up off of the ground and he was weak for you, so of course he followed, palms hitting the table on either side of you as your lips crashed against his. When you pulled away again, he could only hope—fruitlessly—that you didn’t hear the way he whined.
Smiling softly, you tugged him in again briefly, gracing his lips with a chaste kiss before breathing a quiet “Fuck me,” against them.
Hongjoong was so, unbelievably, undeniably weak for you. Weak for the way you felt pressed up against him, the way he knew you would feel around him—and with that thought, he was scrambling to unfasten his pants, suddenly desperate and so, so weak. He hadn’t noticed how constricting the fabric had become until you shoved his pants and boxers down to his knees in one go, the release of pressure pulling a low moan from him. 
Reaching between your bodies, you wrapped your fingers around his length, delighting in the way it twitched in your hand at the same time his breath hitched. He shifted forward, bracing his hands further behind you and crowding into your personal space, slowly guiding you back down onto the table. You stroked him slowly for as long as you could reach, until finally, with a whine of protest, he pressed your shoulder back against the wood. Bracing himself with an arm beside you, he leaned down to catch your lips in a heated kiss, his free hand busying itself with lining his cock up at your entrance. His tip brushed your folds once, twice, before he pushed into you in one fluid thrust, hips falling flush with your own. 
The feeling of him filling you and the sound of the breathy moan that left Hongjoong had your walls fluttering around him, and the pause he took was as much for himself as it was for you, you could tell. So, you gave him his moment, taking the opportunity to drink in his form above you. He looked as desperate as you felt, so before he’d opened his eyes, you rolled your hips, pride swelling in your chest as his eyes shot open and he cursed under his breath. 
“You’re not the only one who doesn’t like repeating themself. Fuck. Me,” you demanded, punctuating it with another grind of your hips against his.
His gaze darkened, and electric arousal warmed your body. You saw him fight for words for a split second and quickly give up, electing instead to drape your knees over his arms and start fucking into you at a brutal pace. The suddenness punched a small yelp out of you at first, and you clapped a hand over your mouth, turning to look anywhere but at the man grinning devilishly down at you. He clicked his tongue and the rough grip he had on one of your thighs disappeared, his hand shifting instead to your chin. You were nearly folded in half as he reached for you, and the shift in angle had his length dragging over all the right places.
Securing your face between his fingers, he yanked you back toward him, forcing eye contact as he pounded into you. “Watch me, sweetheart. Watch me make you come undone again. I want you to remember this.” His rough handling had dislodged your hand from your mouth, and as a drawn out keen began to bubble up from your throat, he shoved two fingers past your lips to silence you. 
Some combination of the intimacy of looking into his eyes and the way he knew your body so well—shifting and adjusting until your legs were shaking—had your high building rapidly, and your teeth closed lightly around his knuckles as you felt the coil tightening in your gut. He tilted his head at you, a weak grin gracing his sweat-coated face as you sucked at the digits, pulling a breathy sigh from him. 
“Close?” he uttered, and you nodded rapidly, one hand snaking between your bodies to rub tight circles over your clit. “Cum with me then, love.” 
Whether it was the pet name or his permission that sent you over the edge, you weren’t quite sure, but just like that, the tension lacing your body snapped, and you clamped down around his cock. Hongjoong did his best to fuck you through it, quickly toppling from his own height and pressing his hips flush you yours as he spilled into you.
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When you had both caught your breath, he leaned down, pressing his lips to yours in a soft kiss and lowering your hips back onto the table. You whined as he slipped out of you, pouting at the low chuckle your reaction received. Before he could walk away to search aimlessly for paper towels or a tissue box you knew weren’t there, you kicked him lightly and pointed to your workbag. “Tissues in there.”
“Mind reader,” he hummed, a lilt of faux annoyance in his tone. 
“‘S why you hired me, Joongie.”
Another quiet laugh and a private smile graced your eyes and ears as he cleaned you both up, tucked himself back into his pants and handed you back your underwear. 
Most days, this was it—he’d be waiting by the door to make a clean exit and you’d see each other when you finally made it back to your desk. So today, when you finished dressing yourself and found him still staring at you, you turned your eyes to the ground bashfully. “Don’t you have work to do?”
Most days, he’d quip back something along the lines of “I don’t know, do I?” Today, he tilted his head at you and smiled.
“That piece was made for you. I think I should work that way more often.”
With another quick kiss to your lips and one to your cheek, he left the room, and you with it, heat rising to your cheeks. “And maybe I should wear ‘not business attire’ more often.”
You weren’t sure what had just happened, exactly, or why, or how serious he was about the dress being made for you—but one thing was certain; you were as weak for Kim Hongjoong as he was for you.
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© June 2023 nebulousbrainsoup | all rights reserved. reposting and translating of author’s work is prohibited.
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signed-sapphire · 25 days
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Okayyyy rewatched Wish
Here are my notes
Valentino wasn’t as annoying as people say. Sure, he did nothing for the plot and could’ve been removed entirely, but he didn’t make near as many butt jokes as people say he did
The lead-ins for all the songs were great. Certain media (Hazbin, for example) just jump into the songs
Magnifico??? Didn’t touch the pages??? So why would he be corrupted? Why does Amaya know of obsidian oil? Don’t you just skim the pages to release the evil?
Dahlia was amazing
“At the very least break the hold it has on him” Amaya? Didn’t you found this kingdom with thin? Wouldn’t you know?
Also Amaya was very sidelined. Where’s her backstory?
Asha’s magic wand mishaps were… corny at best
Why did they make Dario high all the time? He’s not stupid. I feel like they made him try to be like Fred from Big Hero 6 but failed
“Nine zillyboo, twenty alphabet!” Val, buddy. No.
DAHLIA. MATE. TRUE LOVE’S KISS CAN BRUNG HIM BACK I swear, it feels like the directors were switched
The spider-carriage thing. I feel like that could’ve been a Disney reference instead
Gabo was still my favorite out of the teens. Bazeema was sweet too
Also. Halzeema moments were actually in canon.
Sabino did not act 100 at all.
Crushing wishes did nothing to people except make them sad for .2 seconds
Asha’s drawing, her magic wand, none of that was important to the actual plot
I feel like the horses could’ve been Disney references too
Why did the roof open? That was never explained
Mag’s hair needed to be messier. Evil Magnifico? Crazy hair
How did he hear them from all the way down there
Mag’s really out there beating up a minor
The curse rope green things were not scary at all
Was Simon just in the forest the entire time?
The Magnifico getting sucked inside his staff… I feel that could’ve been a play to Dr. Facilier somehow
The stars raining down were beautiful
Was Star’s nose tap a reference to something?
The people’s talking… idk how I felt about that
WE 👏 SHOULD’VE 👏 SEEN 👏 SAKINA’S 👏 WISH
Another half-assed apology. First Namaari, now you. At least Simon’s was an actual apology. Wait. More of it goes on.
Ok his apology isn’t too bad
How did the staff get all the way down there?
Changed my opinion, Amaya deserved to tell Mag off
Did Mag’s curse break once he was in the mirror? Why did he act sad all of a sudden?
I’ve heard Asha’s movements weren’t finalized until later, but her movements seem pretty fluent
Clumsy and energetic, sure, but besides from the mouth drooping part, she wasn’t that quirky
Which. Could be a bad thing. She didn’t really have much of a personality
I like the Peter Pan building a flying machine idea
Zootopia ref
DARIO. SHUT UP
Why does everyone suddenly understand Star
But off-topic they were so cute
“It” I guess
Why refer to Star as an it
“They” was too woke for the Disney execs? Why, you had a one-second offhand comment about a water cousin who’s nonbinary!
That Cinderella-reference thing… wasn’t slow enough to be a dress transformation. So I’m fine with her not having a different dress. I mean obviously I would’ve loved it but idk
SHOW DON’T TELL, DISNEY
STOP TELLING
“I understand you well enough” I DON’T! HOW ARE THEY TELLING YOU
Some of Valentino’s jokes were funny. Sue me
I liked the Tinkerbell and Mikey Mouse reference at the end
The storybook was a nice callback
The credits should’ve been moving. Also CHOOSE BAYMAX TO REPRESENT BIG HERO 6. WHY HAVE VILLAINS LIKE MALEFICENT THERE
Overall. Not as bad as people are making it out to be. But definitely not worthy to be Disney’s 100
I’d say… 7/10. The backgrounds did look watercolor, but the shading seemed off in places. Especially Sakina. There was major improvement to be done, but with the hell the execs were giving (and the proven creativity of the concept art) I feel this movie is getting too much hate. Critiques and criticism are fine. But don’t blame the writers for getting rid of Starboy. Yes, it could’ve been better. But it’s Disney. And the creators tried their best to pour their love into a movie that they didn’t have a full say in.
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wheredidhiseyebrowsgo · 9 months
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Hi! Sorry to bother you, but I'm wondering if you could help me? Do you know of any (Sterek) fics where Scott joins Derek's pack? I just really want to see Stiles and Scott interacting w Hale Pack 2.0! Thank you.
Hi anon! @kevaaronday made this list for us.
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Turn back time by A _pretty_good_pair (23/23 | 49,715 | Teen | Sterek) There's no one left. No one. Stiles decides in his grief to try and fix everything he did wrong the first time around. Will he be able to save everyone or will he relive the pain of losing them all once again?
True by inatshej (1/1 | 38,760 | Explicit | Sterek) The point is, anything can be believed to be true now. If magic can convince Stiles that he loves Derek – weird, angry, too-many-issues Derek – then how is he supposed to know what is actually true, and what is him being mind-screwed?
And Derek can go fuck this mates concept.
Spaz and the Sourwolf by TheRealDanniX (9/9 | 24,674 | Teen | Sterek) When Stiles comes across something he shouldn't in the Preserve he ends up on four legs. Not that anyone in the Pack knows it's him. He's just hoping they can figure it out before anything else bad happens.
clenching my jagged jaws (over the capture) by Marishna (1/1 | 21,495 | Teen | Sterek) Derek Hale was never supposed to be alpha, but he's a good one. He doesn't need any help and he definitely doesn't need an emissary. 
Stiles Stilinski is Derek Hale's emissary and come hell or high water he's going to see the Hale pack through the impending arrival of the alpha pack, even if it means he can never return to Beacon Hills after.
The Vasov Heir by neil4god (12/12 | 20,665 | Not Rated | Sterek) It was summer vacation. He was supposed to go to bed late and sleep even later, he should not be in a car at the ass crack of dawn (12:30) on his way to who know's where. That was not part of the plan, but then he hadn't planned on introducing the pack to his sort of fiance either or introducing them to his family, but his darkest secrets are being dragged into the light and Stiles may not survive it.
When the Wind Blows (the Grass Must Bend) by V1p3r_Qu33n (9/9 | 17,845 | Teen | Scallison) “Why is it a problem that he doesn’t know I’m here?” Scott was just getting more confused with every sentence she spoke and everytime he asked a question the answer just resulted in even more confusion.
She looked past him to a sleek black car that had just pulled up outside the house across from hers. “I think you’re about to find out.” - - - aka: the packs a dysfunctional family. Scott doesn't have a clue what's going on (though he's starting to figure it out), Derek's just trying to keep his betas in line (though they don't always like his methods), and Isaac's just trying to survive.
Learning Curve by Inell (1/1 | 6,050 | Explicit | Poly Pack) When Scott stops by to check on Stiles after he misses school, he isn't expecting to be introduced to the world of polyamory or to agree to become part of the Hale pack in such an unique way.
Heart Smart by Simplistically_content (1/1 | 3,578 | Teen | Sterek) Scott wasn't book smart like Stiles, he wasn't werewolf smart like Derek (was meant to be), he wasn't genius smart like Lydia, his decision making hadn't really given him the best track record where those kind of smarts mattered. No. Where Scott believed he was smartest, was in his heart, in his good nature. Sometimes he screwed up, but no one's perfect, are they?
A place you call home by TalesoftheEnchantedForest (1/1 | 771 | Gen | Sterek) Derek takes a walk through the newly built Hale house and is suddenly overcome by memories, both older and more recent ones. Then he realizes what was missing all along - his pack. Now with Stiles and his friends by his side, he has a home again.
(This is all flashbacks and feels, my dudes.)
Ice(d) Cream by LizzieLance (1/1 | 500 | Gen) “This is indoor snow, baby. Dodgeballllllll.”
“ Throw it, throw it!”
“Stiles, no!”
“Stiles, yes!”
“Over here!”
Whap!
“Ohhh shit.”
Wait, what?? By hugs4saturn (1/1 | 424 | Gen | Sterek) Scott isn't the Alpha.
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cvpitvno · 1 year
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PRINCE CHARMING (part one)
𖤐 — 1.7k
𖤐 — fem!pronouns, soulmate au, angst no comfort (in this part at least), popular!ateez, nerd!reader, one line mentioning suicide, yeosang is horrible in this
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soulmates were a well-known yet foreign concept to many people.
it was plastered all over the news, magazines, or websites; finding your soulmate 101, how to tell if someone is your soulmate, what happens when you find the one? countless (read : pointless) half-assed written columns that misguided the gullible into believing everyone had a happy ending waiting for them down the road.
one of those gullible fools happened to be her.
growing up in a household full of love, kindness, and happiness, she was no stranger to the concept of soulmates. with her parents being high school sweethearts who had the ultimate soulmate meeting, and her brother finding his true love in college, soulmates had been a big part of her life from a young age.
she remembers sleepovers with friends dreaming about the day all of them would find prince charming, and get their own sparkly carriage and pair of glass slippers to which they’d wear to their perfect wedding. it was a fairytale in her eyes at that time, but the dreams and hopefulness lived with her into high school. 
every day she woke up and got ready with the mindset that ‘today could be the day that i meet him’, as she looked at the words written delicately on her wrist.
the font was pretty, cursive and fine, as it looped and swirled to make a beautiful sight to anyone that saw it. however, she knew the minute they would read the actual words inked on her wrist, they would pout in pity at her destiny.
for how were they supposed to be happy for someone whose soulmate would ridicule and put them down with the first words they speak to them.
it was disappointing looking back on the hopeful day of her sixteenth birthday – her family and she were all waiting and watching the clock tick down to midnight on the eve of her sixteenth birthday; eyes darting between the ticking hands of the clock and the blank space on her wrist. at that point in time, untainted with her future sorrows.
her mother and father held each other close, ready to get a minute look into who their baby girl would be destined to be with in life, just as her brother and his then-fiancee sat with baited breaths to see the ink fade onto her skin.
they, like her, were left in shock at the harsh words that painted themselves on her skin at the stroke of midnight.
the girl who grew up wishing, hoping, praying, and waiting for her happily ever after and prince charming, had been let down before she had even met the man; but the child, the small and hopeful girl, was still alive deep down no matter how hard she tried to pretend she didn’t know her fate.
perhaps the words were just an ugly start to a beautiful thing. 
or perhaps the man of her dreams has problems in his life that she was dying to help him through, hoping that the venom-laced words would fade into soft kisses and whispers of love.
so while she expected disappointment, she still awaited her happy ending with a slowly breaking heart, and a newfound impatience yet dread for the day she would finally meet the man she grew up calling her ‘prince charming’.
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high school was hell on earth.
especially considering the kids she went to school with.
self-obsessed, headstrong, over-the-top, and just downright rude kids – kids that made her life a living hell the moment her teacher announced that she had the highest grade in a class all those years ago.
rich, popular, and pretty people didn’t take kindly to those who were smart – it didn’t matter their looks, social status, or situation; if you presented yourself as an academic threat, they sought out to make coming to school dreadful.
she did better than some other so-called nerds at her school – while they dealt with spilled milk, scrapes and bruises, or the confined spaces of lockers, she had been able to escape without much harm.
keeping her head down and blending in with the crowd was the ultimate way to remain unscathed, unbothered, and undetected.
what also made going unnoticed easier, was the extensive focus on the it boys of the school; upper classman park seonghwa and kim hongjoong, boys in her grade jeong yunho, kang yeosang, and choi san, and the lower classman song mingi, jung wooyoung, and choi jongho.
while her peers fawned, entertained, and followed the boys around, she had been able to keep on top of her studies, slip by the popular girls without being touched, and shimmied her way through the crowds of boys so she could start her trek home.
that at least would have been the case had she not been body checked by a certain black-haired beauty with the mark of an angle beside his eye.
be it the shock of hitting the ground harshly or the disturbance in her bubble of ease and quietness, she had realized that her time of peace was likely to end after this run-in with the one and only kang yeosang.
a beautifully handsome boy who held the hearts of many had a knack for music and spoke words laced so richly with ice and blades, that even a compliment coming from his mouth felt like it cut deep.
“jesus, why do you snobby little nobodies not pay attention to where you walk?” yeosang looked down his nose at the girl who looked up at him with wide eyes. “you made me spill my drink,” yeosang growled, turning on his heel and kicking dust towards the girl who’s jaw had long since dropped after her mind processed his words.
she knew eyes were on her, both from the growing crowd who gossiped at the sight of the ice prince, kang yeosang, snap on the clumsy girl, and the group of boys who sneered at her from their position near the picnic table in the school courtyard.
with bambi like legs, a skirt full of dust from the pavement, and red palms and knees, she had stood up and looked at the back of yeosang,
“it’s you! you’re my soulmate!” her words made her cringe as she let it sink in who exactly she was yelling out for. the same man that acted as if him stepping back into her path and knocking her to the ground was her doing.
silence washed over the courtyard as the crowd watched yeosang's back grow taught, steps faltering as he let your words ring in his head a few times.
god, she wished she could have just run away, but she was sure the people who gathered around would laugh and push her back towards the boy, desperate to see a showing of yet another embarrassed girl facing the harsh words of yeosang.
yeosang turned on his heel slowly, a half-assed smirk lining his lips, and while she might have imagined it, she could have sworn she’d seen something else in his eyes; something she couldn’t put her finger on.
“soulmate?” yeosang laughed at the word. “god, for a nerd like you, i’m surprised you're that dumb,” yeosang sneered at the look of gloss growing in her eyes. he stepped closer, keeping his voice loud so everyone could hear. “sorry to tell you, but someone else is gonna say the exact same thing i said to you one day – someone else in life is gonna see you for the nobody that you are and tell it like it is,” he huffed, looking at her shaking frame with disgust. “if i was your soulmate, i’d kill myself before i lowered my standards for someone like you.”
‘oh’s’ and ‘ah’s’ echoed through the courtyard; that paired with the whoops and hollers from the boys behind yeosang taunted her even more.
kang yeosang was a cruel boy, but never had he been as cruel as he’d been at that moment.
everything after that had been a blur; fleeting footsteps, the wind blowing harshly on her wet cheeks, and the blurriness of the sidewalk she fled on were all she remembered of her journey home. now, the darkness of her room, soaked pillowcase, and shaking hands were all she knew.
she hadn’t known how long she had laid in bed and cried, but she knew a considerable amount of time had passed since she had collapsed on her bed when she heard the voice of her mother echo from downstairs.
“y/n, darling, do you wanna run to the grocery store with me?” her voice grew louder and the sound of footsteps and the creaking of the staircase faded into the scene. “i need to grab some things for dinner-” her mother's voice halted as she opened her daughter's door and found the girl with bloodshot eyes, tear-stained cheeks, and lips bitten raw.
it was a far cry from the happy, composed, and sweet girl she had come to know.
“oh baby, what’s going on?” her mom hurried into the dark room, sitting on the edge of her bed as she laid a hand on what she presumed to be her daughter's thigh.
it was hard to speak; after all, she had sobbed and borderline screamed at the pain and sadness she had felt. voice raw from exertion. it took her several minutes to even compose herself enough to tell her mother what had conspired mere hours prior.
the boy she had hoped to be different, the words she had hoped were a misunderstanding, and the happily ever after the girl had dreamed about since a young age, had slipped through her fingertips and shattered in front of the entire school.
everything was torture – her chest hurt, her head pounded ferociously, and she felt as if she had no control over the shaking in her body. rejection was always a scary thing, but this was nightmare fuel. something she was sure would play on repeat in her mind every night and keep her up for hours. something she was sure could never be topped.
she wanted everything to disappear.
including that damned tattoo that burned her skin.
her mother held her as she choked on her sobs, fingers gripping the arms of her mother as she pulled her daughter in close and whispered sweet nothings into her ear. 
in that moment, the burning fondness she had for soulmates had been put out.
her hope, belief, and love for the idea of the universe putting two people together who would love, cherish, and care for each other had finally dimmed and turned to smoke.
all because of a boy named kang yeosang.
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am-cogitoergosum · 1 year
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random poppy war headcannons
• while she was studying for the keju, kesegi asked rin about her new scars. rin would come up with an action packed, overly exaggerated story on how she got each one. they both knew it wasn't true, but kesegi loved listening to the stories and rin loved to tell them, it took her mind off of all the stress she was under.
•ramsa would randomly ask for piggyback rides from basically anyone in the cike that could pick him up
•chaghan used to get bullied as a kid because of his weak build, and qara would protect him every time she saw it happening
•nezha loves the concept of makeup and hair-care. venka is the only person he trusts enough to express this with, and he always asks her about beauty routines. his interest in such "feminine" things is still a huge insecurity for him tho
•kitay is neurodivergent, i don't have so much evidence to back this up, but im sure he is
•kitay and rin often make jokes about kitay being rin's "right hand man"
•get it
•bcs her hand was cut off
•ramsa and baji are banned from sugar consumption for the greater good of everyone around them
•rin has the humor of a twelve year old boy and her time spent with jiang and the cike only encouraged her further
•pipaji dulin and lianhua developed a sibling relationship much like the watterson family in the amazing world of gumball
•altan has an irrational fear of arachnids. idk i just like the idea of him turning into a completely different person when there's a spider around
•rin and altan make jokes about the genocide of speer sometimes
•"rin, istg keep testing me, i will bury you in the ashes of our ancestors."
•"what are you gonna do about it altan? tell your parents? oh, wait."
•"you went there huh? see this is why i hate speerlies, mangy dirtskinned savages, all of them."
•of course, if anyone else joined in on these jokes they would get a memorable (and very painful) reminder that they do not have the right to speak that way
•kitay can waggle his eyebrows in a horrendous manner and he uses this skill to terrorize his friends
•jiang does the same thing with hanelai and the trifecta
•ppl say venka doesn't have a role in the whole trifecta reincarnated thing, but i say her role rlly fits hanelai, she was never as famous, always an outsider no matter how important of a role she played, n just like hanelai she is full of rage at the men who did her wrong
•hanelai would have been an amazing mother
•after rin tested into sinegard, tutor feyrick worked hard to quit his gambling addiction
•in a happier universe kid altan and kid chaghan would have a little treehouse with a big "NO GIRLS ALLOWED" sign on it. sometimes, they'd invite the rest of the cike over to play as well.
•of course, rin and qara are the only exceptions to this "no girls" rule
•baji does a terrifyingly accurate impression of quandale dingle and he uses this ability for the utmost evil
•nezha flirts with himself in the mirror
•vaisra never ate dumplings or anything related to the food after the whole jinzha incident
•in a modern universe jiang would purchase like 300 tiny plastic babies and leave them around the whole school for ppl to find
•rin has a distaste for sex jokes, she always responds with a "don't be disgusting" to every intercourse related joke she hears.
•venka likes giving rin mixed signals, one second she'd be throwing the most wonderful compliments ever created at her, next second she's calling her the ugliest most hotheaded stupid asshole to ever exist
•this leaves rin far too confused to feel flattered or offended
•suni cries when he sees other people cry
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darkstar225 · 1 year
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Twice’s 10th member has a solo debut
A/N: I actually got another ask on Tumblr, yaaaaay! :)
The request: Can you do something like the 10th member getting a solo and twice's reaction to her being all grown up? I imagine they'd be the type to be so motherly and shocked to see a different side of her.😂 but at the end of the day she's still their lil baby!
PS: Tysm for everyone that reads what I write, I hope I can bring a smile to your faces every time I post! I'd like to thank whoever sent me this idea 'cause I loved to write it <3 
__________________________________________________________
It's been a long time since TWICE debuted and they couldn't be happier, after many requests their dear maknae got a chance to become a soloist. What they never expected was that she would be doing such a different concept from the one the group had. 
As Y/N walked past the trainees, she finally understood how her unnies felt when they knew they'd perform alone. It was a mix of emotions she couldn't grasp how to deal with, after running along the corridors she finally found the waiting room where the staff and managers were all at. 
Y/N: I'm sorry, I got lost *bowing*
Manager oppa: Hahahah, it's okay kid. Did you forget the way here?
Y/N: Yes... Jihyo unnie always guides me here and Sana unnie is always holding my hand so *shrugs*
Manager oppa: At least you got here safe and sound!
Y/N: Thank you for waiting and my apologies again. *bowing*
Meanwhile... her sisters were at the dorm preparing for the surprise they didn't tell their youngest. Even if they had a whole day of schedules they'd cancel it to support their maknae altogether. Also, they're incredibly curious about the title of the album, regardless of the days they spend begging for a sneak peek, Y/N stood her ground and denied showing anything till the day she'd be debuting, which is today!
Sana: I can't wait to see what our baby is gonna sing!!
Nayeon: She's amazing, look at this young pic of her. I can't believe she grew up so much!
Jihyo: She will always be our maknae, even when she's 60.
Jeongyeon: That's true, I can only imagine how much more endearing she can get!
Mina: Let's hurry, Manager oppa already send the signal (찌릿 찌릿 찌릿 찌릿)
Dahyun: It's not gonna be long till she gets on stage, we need to get there asap
Tzuyu: It's not her wedding unnies, we must leave now
Momo: Fineee, come on girls!
Chaeyoung: Finally!
Momo: I heard that -_-
Jihyo: Me too, Son Chaeyoung.
Chaeyoung: Sorry unnie.
Jihyo: That's more like it...
After some -years- minutes, they're finally heading to the venue. The traffic was horrible but they got there on time (How? I guess we'll never know)
Sprinting through the halls they noticed their maknae a mile away, she was already on stage getting ready to record, not a single thought on her mind besides "You can do it, if the unnies did it, you can too" and because of that she failed to take note of her unnies eyeing her outfit and the concept of the stage (let's imagine she's the singer of Gotta Go by Chungha) and talking quietly with each other.
Mina: I mean- look at the aesthetic, it seems like she's gonna do something less cute than our songs.
Chaeyoung: Yeahhh, she's gonna rock the stage anyway ✨
Nayeon: There wasn't another option hon, she's our child.
At this moment, Y/N starts walking around the stage to check all aspects of the performance before she begins. Her members can see the change in her eyes and the confidence she carries. Her outfit is way more revealing than anything they've ever seen her use and the most surprising is how different she looks with makeup on, normally she goes for a natural look so spotting something like that makes them realize how grown up their maknae is, even if they refuse to believe it every single day. Sana: Wow, look! It's like a catwalk!
Momo: Ngl, she's looking hot.
Jihyo: HEY. I wanna oppose 'cause it's my kid we're talking about but yeah... I agree.
The youngest goes to her place and starts singing like there's no tomorrow, her members can only stare without saying a word, baffled doesn't even cover how they feel. When it gets to the chorus, her dance makes Momo think back to all the personal classes she gave the maknae when they were only a year after debuting. Jihyo starts to reflect on how much the girl has grown, from a child that followed her around to the woman that's on the stage belting and grooving to the rhythm of the song they could never see their kid doing. With tears in her eyes, Nayeon just seems to be perplexed by the changes between on-stage and off-stage Y/N, the innocent doe eyes she does when she wants some candy, the stumps when she gets frustrated about something she didn't get, the completely full of blush face she gets when her unnies annoy and fool around with her and everything else, disappeared, and TWICE didn't see it coming, they knew Y/N had already ended her teenage years however, seeing up close how adult, like she's by herself, is a shock.
Chaeyoung: Bro... Are you seeing what I'm seeing?
Dahyun: Yeah bro, she doesn't even seem like our maknae.
Sana: Where did my baby go??
Mina: Our honey seems so professional up there, I can't even explain how proud I feel.
Jeongyeon: Who let her do that? JYP didn't give us a warning!
Jihyo: A warning would be good... 
Chaeyoung: Hell yeah.
Nayeon: Language.
Dahyun: Did you actually say that? I'm the only one who heard it??
Tzuyu: I did too, made her more of a grandma than we thought. 
Nayeon: WHAT?
Sana: Shhhh, we're trying to listen to our baby singing. 
Momo: Yeah grandma, let us appreciate our maknae.
Nayeon: Fine. I'm gonna let it slide just for our maknae. 
When Y/N did some waves they couldn't help but want to close their eyes and think "This is a child, our child" but at the end of the day they understood how they should never judge the youngest for her solo, she wasn't that kid that entered the group and made their hearts melt from how much of a child she was, playing with her dolls from time to time, wanting to go to the park with her sisters, dancing to stupid songs just because. She still made them swoon in a blink of an eye but she grew up and they had to recognize that they did help on providing to create an incredible human being, their Y/N, their inspiration to be better every day.
After her stage, Y/N brighten up immediately when she saw her unnies. Running like the kid they remember each second they breathe, and that's when they started thinking the same thing: 
We love our dear maknae.
A/N: I apologise for any errors, English is not my first language. Pls, let me know if there's something wrong, ty for reading <3
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whalesandclouds · 7 months
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How can I lead a more abundant life? | PAC reading
Hi!
Please pick an image that first catches your eye. If unsure, close your eyes, breathe in and out a few times and then look again.
Just a friendly reminder that this is a general pick a card reading, so only take what resonates. Any feedback is always appreciated!
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1-2 3-4
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PILE 1
I can lead a more abundant life by releasing what no longer serves me, so my light can shine brightly. Old stories from my past are coming up to be healed. There has never been a safer time to clear these patterns then right now. What old ways of being have expired in my current life? When I acknowledge these old patterns, they lose any power over me. I am courageous and I am able to release the old with ease. I shift my perspective and look at them in the light. I think of my fears as an opportunity to expand. Perhaps I have forgotten my own strength? Then it is time I go deep within to find it again. To find in my heart what feeds my soul and makes me come alive.
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PILE 2
I can lead a more abundant life by staying balanced and patient. I take accountability for my actions. I recognise that I am enough and I am able to stop overthinking this. I am already facing the right way. The foundations have been laid and connecting with the divine feminine energy allows me to nurture the seeds I have planted. I will give them time to grow. I acknowledge that not everyone will understand my journey and that is completely okay. I embrace my true self and I let the world see who I really am! This will bring harmony into my life.
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PILE 3
I can lead a more abundant life by not getting completely consumed by employment and family commitments. Letting go of fear, anxiety and lower-based energies helps me to stay neutral and one with my true self. I feel like I want to put on my favourite songs and dance the stress away. By shifting my energy I am flowing along with the Universe, not against it. I also wish to connect with my soul family right now. How can I be open and connect more with the people, who truly matter to me? That lift me up and make me forget my need for isolation..
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PILE 4
I can lead a more abundant life by having faith. I recognise that what was previously hidden is coming to light. However, I am completely capable of purifying these areas of my life. My capacity to love and hold others is limited to my capacity to love and hold myself. I am ready to forgive myself. I am ready to let more love into my life. There are ideas, truths, concepts, books and creations waiting to be birthed into this world. I have a great gift in being able to see the potential of things before they exist. I won’t give up now!
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writing-for-life · 4 months
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Hey Dear. I highly admire your wisdom and opinions around The Sandman Universe and I’d love to come back to Morpheus’ end and his long way to his fatal fall. Even if he has chosen to go down this road, with all of these alternative exits along his way I still wonder: It all started with that wonderful allegory of „Seeking Destruction“ in Brief Lives. Maybe Neil’s quote „You cannot seek Destruction and return unscathed“ is a key or hint to the question who wanted to destroy Dream? Is it really possible that our good old endless friends Destruction is the one behind? That even when he left his realm it’s still his nature, to destroy (Morpheus) and make something new?! Loki the great manipulator talked about a higher instance that uses him. Was it Destruction? Could he has done it out of what… incomprehension towards Dreams way to rule his own realm or just because of being… destructive?!
Adding as usual: Send me your asks, everyone—I love them!
Thank you so much, friend, and such good questions!
Honest answer: No one truly wanted to destroy Dream apart from Dream himself. Even Desire, who is arguably most out to get him, didn't really in my view. Did they want to teach him a lesson? Yes. Did they want to hit him where it hurt? Also yes. They are just diametrically opposed despite being surface level similar. But when Desire notices it is truly happening, that Dream is on a path with no backing out, they are scared and fairly close to losing their bearings. And their speech during The Wake shows that they just wished they hadn't been in each others' lives and might have both been better for it. Also: They even tried to warn him at the beginning of Brief Lives. And they told Tiffany about it, too. For Desire, the A Midsummer Night's quote also comes true (and how funny is it that we get an explicit mention of both desire and dream here?:
They only see the prize, their heart's desire, their dream... But the price of getting what you want, is getting what you once wanted.
They think they want to destroy Dream (or maybe not even that. It's really cosmic level "throwing dummies out of the pram" with them. They need a get along shirt, is what I'm saying 🤣). But once Desire gets what they want, it's all not that clear-cut anymore.
Who is at fault or: The Endless as concepts
I guess to look deeper into who is at fault, it all boils down to really having to see the Endless as concepts, and I personally don't think it started only with Brief Lives--it started much, much earlier. At least (!) in "The Sound of her Wings"--I think people often misunderstand it solely as Death setting Morpheus' head straight and him being reminded of his function again. Which is true to a degree. But I firmly believe this is actually the issue where Morpheus decides death is his way out. She gave him "much to think about". He "hears her wings". His responsibilities can wait for a moment (that's the only time you'll ever hear him saying that).
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Dream has always been closest to Death--she gives him solace and comfort, he considers death a gift. I recommend reading the poem in issue #8 again.
Death is before me today:    like the recovery of a sick man,    like going forth into a garden after sickness. Death is before me today:    like the odor of myrrh,   like sitting under a sail in a good wind. Death is before me today:    like the course of a stream;   like the return of a man from the war-galley to his house. Death is before me today:   like the home that a man longs to see,   after years spent as a captive.
Then look at that last stanza. That is his takeaway. That is what it feels like to him. He is that man who spent years in captivity. He longs to see that home--he wants to die. It's already in plain sight here.
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And yes, all the other siblings are conceptual as well.
We meet Destiny the first time in #7, "Sound and Fury", and we already get a hint that he is worried to turn the pages of his book--which could be considered foreshadowing that it is possible for Morpheus to die (which shouldn't be the case from all we know up until there).
We meet Desire and Despair for the first time in issue 10, and while people focus a lot on Desire wanting to destroy Dream, I'd like to propose the following: Dream, at this stage, already desires death. Whether he does so consciously or subconsciously doesn’t really matter. So if we see the twins as purely conceptual, they just heard his call:
He is in a state of despair, and he desires to die.
It's always been in Dream to feel like that, for much longer. But this is where it gets really obvious. He made that choice two issues beforehand. Desire always meddles because that's what Desire does. They hear your call and make you want, no matter if it's good for you or not. We see this with literally everyone they are ever involved in. And sometimes giving one thing to someone takes something away from another. Plus, they flippin' saved the Universe with Dream, so they definitely have it in them to do good (even if not always for the most ethical reason). After the reset, they just remember flashes of the wrong (or shall I say right?) stuff, like using dream vortices to get to Dream.
He goes on a journey with Delirium in Brief Lives to seek Destruction. Why did Delirium choose him? Because he's the only one (unlike his siblings, who all sent Delirium away) who is receptive. One could think Dream is in a mildly delirious state after Thessaly left him. And that's why he is so on and off with Delirium. He has moments of clarity when he knows it's a shitty idea, when he knows it affects other people, when he calls it off because he feels responsible for Ruby's death, when he knows it isn't right. And then Death (!!!) tells him off because he "hurt Delirium", and he keeps going. He still seeks Death. And he finds Destruction.
That's all so deeply metaphorical, I don't even know where to start.
Is Destruction behind it?
No. If we subscribed to that thought, Death would actually be a much more likely culprit, but she isn't either. Or she is. Just like all the siblings are and aren't. Destruction is just what he is conceptually, just like all the other siblings are.
It is Dream himself who orchestrated all of it, consciously or subconsciously (both really). And when you look at when he meets what sibling, it all becomes really crystal clear (I actually have a meta about this in the making, I'll tag you when it's done).
If anything, Destruction wanted to help him, tell him to walk away. He says this to Daniel in The Wake as well--that there's basically a way out if he can't do it anymore. But Destruction's way is not Morpheus!Dream's way, neither is it likely to ever be Daniel!Dream's way.
So I guess conceptually yes, he destroys and hence creates something new (which ties in nicely with him visiting Daniel!Dream and actually being the first one who shows true care towards him). But the impulse always comes from Dream I think. Just like with all his other siblings.
Whenever he is closest to someone or meets one of his siblings, it tells us something about his state of mind. Is this a chicken and egg problem, as in: Does he make them do it or do they make him do it? Well, the Endless exist because sentient beings make it so, not the other way around. So he meets whomever he meets because he calls for them, so to speak. At least that's how I see it.
Who is that higher instance?
I am fairly certain that the higher instance Loki talks about is Dream himself. Loki transgressed majorly in Season of Mists, and Dream twisted his arm into a deal at the end of SoM. We never find out at that point what the deal is, but yeah--it's probably fairly safe to assume it's "that one".
Also: If Dream hadn't commissioned Shakespeare, Puck wouldn't have been on the loose.
And even in Dream Hunters (so even further back in time), he already "learned lessons"--especially about existential dread (the Onmyōji), but also about doing the right thing out of love (both the monk and the fox), even if it leads to your own demise (the monk).
And even in Overture, we get hints that he might have had an epiphany that there's another Dream in the future (that whole "time flies" panel, using the saeculum etc). Morpheus gets an inkling it might be a future version of himself that sends the saeculum back in time. How much of it he remembers and whether it is fragmented after the reset will of course forever stay a mystery; but it quite frankly doesn’t make sense that he doesn’t remember because we get too many hints he does.
Suffice it to say: He's been baiting the traps for a while (and even Death tells him so before she takes his hand), literally hundreds of years, but issue #8 is really where everything is starting to fall into place.
And that’s because the fishbowl changed him. He staved it off for as long as he could stay aloof and detached. But once he entered the realm of human experience, as Frank McConnell called it in his intro to the Kindly Ones, he was done for...
Now, whether he wanted it to happen exactly the way it did—that’s an entirely different question, because I don’t think he did. Maybe he had planned for a slightly more, shall we call it elegant exit, but he backed himself into a corner with his rigid sense of duty until the way it went remained the only way out if he wanted to prevent more damage to what he cared for—the Dreaming.
Woah, blabbering away as usual, thanks again for the ask!
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wumiings · 8 months
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Trying to tease out any ideas about SY’s life pre-canon is so tricky because you have to sort of choose a point on the sliding scale between the two basic reasons for SQQ completely blocking out the ‘Shen Yuan’ identity:
His previous life was bad/painful and he wants to forget it in favor of the new one
His previous life was good and it’s painful to remember what he can never have back
It’s unlikely that the truth lies at either extreme, but the little information we have makes it hard to determine which way the scale tips.
On the one hand, it’s clear that SQQ disdains SY on some level. He lacks ambition; he’s a “useless pretty boy waiting around to die.” His isolated, chronically-online lifestyle is profoundly unfulfilling, and he blames himself for it (although the audience has reason to believe this is not an entirely accurate self-assessment, hence the neurodivergence/invisible illness theories).
It makes sense that he would attach himself more strongly to the identity that he sees as having more substance; pre-canon, he mostly ‘lives’ online and therefore retains ties to the ‘Peerless Cucumber’ identity after transmigrating. So far, this all seems pretty cut and dry.
But on the other hand, there’s Shen Yuan’s family. Now, I see no reason to disbelieve the three straightforward facts we’re presented with on this subject: that one of his older brothers was warm and attentive, like YQY; that he doted on his younger sister (and read her kinky danmei); and that he didn’t have the same obligation to excel as his brothers because he didn’t have to inherit the family business.
However, if they were all as close as he claims, why doesn’t he seem to mourn them? After pushing LBH into the Abyss, SQQ “doesn’t mourn” but it’s obvious from everyone’s reactions that he really fucking does. In contrast, there aren’t many signs in the first book that he’s secretly struggling with the grief of never seeing his loved ones again.
Are these relationships so ultimately insignificant/unfulfilling that he can easily cast them off right along with the concept of ‘Shen Yuan’? Are they more fraught/bittersweet than he is willing to acknowledge (and is this related to why we get no particular details about his parents or second brother)? Or is feeling of loss so powerful that he can’t even allow himself to contemplate or allude to it, can only cling to this new identity that never had a family to lose?
SY!SQQ’s “true self” is Shen Qingqiu. And in that sense, an identity reveal really isn’t that important, because it wouldn’t change anything about how the other characters should understand him. But if you view the narrative as shaped behind the scenes by a hidden yet pervasive grief inextricably tied to Shen Yuan’s history, then that history and that self become relevant to his present and future.
As notable as it is that he opted to go by his internet handle in the mushroom body, I think it’s also somewhat symbolic that the physical form he grew for himself was a combination of Shen Yuan and Shen Qingqiu’s features. And that while these three identities (SY, SQQ, Cucumber) were integrated into a single self, he was stronger than any of them individually.
Just some food for thought.
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