#two high achievers fighting each other over who will confess first | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

balsamfir-fics · 2 years

Text

a hope at risk (part 1)

Genres: angst, 99% canon (eps 6-9), more angst, eventual smut, established childhood crushes to strangers to lovers, post-pining, becoming machine herald (sort of)

Pairing: Viktor/Female Reader

Warnings: series will have eventual smut. none in this preview.

Summary: For nearly two decades after you waltzed out of Viktor's life as the childhood friend who broke his heart, he hoped to forget you. Now that you're back, firmly settled in his life and his arms, he wants nothing more than to live, to love, to dream. With a terminal diagnosis you've yet to learn about in a city waiting to erupt into war, however, Viktor realizes this is a fight for survival against all odds. But he can't lose you again. He won't. He hopes.

Chapters: Prelude | Part 1 | Part 2 [M] | Part 3 | Part 4 [FINAL]

Chapter Word Count: ~4.7k

Author Notes: Unedited. Sequel to a hope never forgotten. This work can be read independently of its predecessor – though reading that first will more thoroughly contextualize Viktor and YN’s relationship. Prequel summarized below for those who don’t have time to read it!

Prequel summary: If you are reading this without having seen the previous work, this is the debrief: YN is Heimerdinger’s adopted daughter; YN and Viktor are childhood friends who grew up together between the ages of 10-16 and separated at 16 immediately after an unspoken confession of love. The uncertainty and cowardice of youth prevent YN from keeping contact until twelve years pass. Over the next five years the two keep orbiting each other, gravity pulling them closer, until Viktor’s hospital stint as per Episode 5 forces YN to reckon with their lifetime of love. The end of A Hope Never Forgotten sees Viktor’s seventeen-year-long hope and longing fulfilled.

A Hope Never Forgotten follows Arcane canon up to Episode 5; this work will follow Arcane canon until the end of all currently available content (Episode 9). This piece borrows themes from prior League of Legends lore, but following the events of Episode 9 it will become an imagined ‘what comes next’ as we wait for the events of Season 2.

The prior work deals primarily with holding onto hope; this one deals with themes of loss and survival. Both are about decisions made and avoided.

-------------------------------------------------------

He’ll never forget today, his sixteenth birthday. (Or so he thinks; months later, he’ll do everything he can to forget it when you leave him confused and aroused without so much as a word, never to return until over a decade later). But today, today he thinks that this is birthday is unforgettable. The past three years had been nothing if not tumultuous, but Viktor wouldn’t trade those ups and downs for the world. Alright, maybe he’d trade some of those downs; they had been quite terrible indeed.

Yet the highs had been worth it. You were now his best friend, someone who he considered part of his world for live. If he were honest with himself, he would admit that you had become something more in his heart. For now, though, he commits himself to the promise of science and the achievements he’s accomplished therein. And right in this moment, with an alarmingly sparkly party hat affixed above his is unruly hair and an outrageously loudly-colored cake half smushed into his face, he’s achieved the pinnacle of happiness in his life thus far.

This was the second cake of the day, baked by the Heimerdinger Estate kitchen staff (though the colors were certainly your doing) and intended solely for a large group of students from Heimerdinger’s network that he barely knew and you cared little for. He didn’t mind the public birthday party; while it certainly wasn’t his style, he thought it wise to indulge his surrogate father for just this one day out of the year. Instead, it was the first cake that mattered most to him. You’d barreled into his room (just two doors down from yours) at an ungodly hour that morning; with luck he had been awake at his desk, absently scribbling lines into a piece of parchment, thoughts of you preventing him from achieving fitful sleep. He’d been startled, but pleasantly surprised, when you triumphantly dropped a mangled-looking personal cake onto his desk and stabbed a candle into it. The dessert itself was an odd shape and frosted in an odd color. (The first educated guess that came to his mind was more than inappropriate, but perhaps it was the panicked look on his face that gave it away. You’d hastily explained that it was, in fact, not a penis, but rather a bungled attempt at making a scientific beaker shape, and he’d gone red at your language almost immediately). It was, additionally, not the most ideal breakfast foods, but Viktor didn’t mind. You’d made it yourself, just for him, and that was what mattered. You’d bossily ordered him to make a wish, in part because you were fed up with how selfless he tended to be and how little he asked for while living in a house full of riches and opportunity. When he obliged you, you grinned, and resisted the itching temptation to smash the cake into his face—you had designs to do so later in the formal party, anyway. He closed his eyes then, long and dark eyelashes fluttering shut elegantly. And as soon as his eyes opened to those brilliantly-shining amber irises, you’d blurted out your burning question (“so, what did you wish for?”) despite the societal conventions and unspoken rules that you should never have done so. To his own surprise, Viktor’s wish left his lips immediately, as if obedience to your command were more important than old wives’ tales. Months later, sitting in your empty bedroom, he would curse his lips, wondering if he’d jinxed his wish by whispering it into the world. “I wished that you would call me Vitya,” he exhaled quickly, words almost tumbling over each other. He thought your face flushed, but you turned away before he could deduce anything further. “…Okay,” you’d said, and his heart swelled in his chest. “I’m not going to do it now, but… soon. Someday. When I’m brave enough.” He’d reached out for your hand then, brushing warm strokes over the back of your knuckles, and then you cleared your throat to order him to take a bite. That cake wasn’t quite as delicious or well-baked as the one half-smeared on his face, but he cherished it nonetheless. Now, as he sits with that hat still haphazardly perched atop his head, he smiles at nobody in particular, because you’ve just grabbed him by the face and planted a loud, exuberant kiss to his cheek as you crowed “happy birthday, Vik!” He knows you’re caught up in the excitement and your pride in him, your best friend (as well as the giddy glee that comes with shoving cake into a loved one’s face), but that matters not. The warmth your lips leave behind contrast the cold frosting, and it makes all of the cake’s insults to his bodily fastidiousness more than bearable. It’s in that moment that he resolves to square up, sort out his feelings for you, and finally tell you. He never gets that chance later on, but for now, he is happiest. —-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- There’s something in the air in Runeterra. It has to be, you think. Something is not right. You can feel it in your bones; a storm is brewing and you can’t tell quite what kind of storm it will be – all you know is that it is on it’s way. You shiver as the crisp autumnal breeze swerves around your shoulders, and you pull at the edges of your shawl to drag them back over your skin. Seasons are changing, and it doesn’t feel good. It feels like there are other monumental shifts in the world, ones that you don’t imagine lead to happiness and prosperity. It’s your work that clues you in first; after moving back home to Piltover permanently in the past two years, you have never been away from the City of Progress for long – your trips overseas to assist with the charities you help fund have been few and far between thanks to the rapid speeds of Hexgate travel carrying your instructions to satellite workers. But in the past few months you have been asked to help in other regions – dragged off and mandated to orchestrate last-minute fundraising events for your employers’ clients. You don’t particularly mind the trips – nor the work; while it’s odd to have an uptick in hob-nobbing among the rich and powerful, the trips allow you to check in on the various social businesses and charities you helped establish. Truth be told, you’re now grateful for the requirements of the wealthy – without their demands for your physical presence, you wouldn’t have been allowed the opportunity to see the deterioration of these cities in person. Things are… falling apart. The shining beacons of hope you fought so hard to plant are doing their best, but your boots-on-the-ground collaborators tell you that something is amiss. Unrest is just one bar fight away from exploding; the hurt and in need everywhere you go are suffering more than usual; more fearful, more tense, more on edge than you’ve ever seen them. “There might be war imminent,” warns a local leader in Demacia. “Something is brewing in Noxus,” intones a bar owner in Bilgewater. Everyone points fingers at someone else, and some fingers are pointed towards Piltover. But while you’re grateful for the chance to see the truth with your own eyes – to know that the whisperings of the commonfolk are not trickling upwards to the diplomats that supposedly represent them – there is one thing you are not happy about regarding your absences away from home. To your dismay, it's Viktor. Mere months ago, the man who’d held your heart for seventeen years (unbeknownst to him) slipped into this place in your life in the real world – out of the fantasy and longing you’d allowed to fester over those years of guilt and misguidedness, and into your real, physical arms. And while it had been a joy to reunite as lovers, not only as friends, after so long a hiatus between your first kiss and your next, there was much to discuss and work through together. Neither of you were prepared; both had resigned yourselves to the idea that your relationship would never be – that you would permanently exist out of the purview of the other’s life. When the you moved back home two years ago, you both had been merely grateful for the slightest chance to share each other’s company as friends – this newfound relationship was something that only existed in dreams, and as such often failed the idealistic visions either you or Viktor conjured during those seventeen years. You both tried your best, trying to learn about the new adult versions of each other you were unfamiliar with while reconciling them against the memories of the past. But years of silence and neglect did not fade away easily, especially for Viktor, who had been on the receiving end of virtually no information. Heimerdinger, your adoptive father, had kept you up-to-date in his letters and during your visits – he hadn’t known you were not in contact with his protege Viktor, you vowed for him to never learn of your deception to one of his most cherished friends. It was hard (at best) on the days you argued over something silly, like either one of you forgetting to honor a date due to late hours at work. At worst after an argument, Viktor closed himself off, more familiar with your abandonment than your embrace — no matter how much he wanted to run to you, he still had his own pride, and there was something to be said about the comfort of the familiar. He would only emerge after the n-th time re-reading your letters, reminding himself that you did in fact love him terribly, instead of villainizing you in his mind. You knew he didn’t withdraw because he felt unlovable, but rather because he felt you were incapable of truly reciprocating his efforts – this was something you didn’t hold against him, usually. You understood what your years of silence had done. . Still, you were making progress. You were trying harder than ever to be more transparent, to be more available; it was the least you could do to move forward from the way you hid for so long. But you knew he was still frustrated with you, and you with him. Couldn’t he understand that you were committed, that you should be trusted? But no, he couldn’t, not easily, not when your work took you away from him for days at a time. And you needed to understand that you needed patience – as much patience as he’d had with you. Hurtful memories did not fade easily. With each of these recent excursions, you had also been unable to send word. In your first few work trips, you sent letters that inspired Viktor to put in more overtime at the lab in your absence, bolstered by the evidence that you did mean to commit to your relationship. But when more cities revealed more problems with the strange static in the air, your letters dwindled to a trickle as you spent more time away from your desk at whatever inn, and each time you knocked on his door after arriving at the port, his eyes narrowed a bit more, mouth pulled a bit tighter. Truth be told, he was looking worse for wear every time you returned – as if the weariness of the world fell upon his own shoulders. He knew you loved him. You knew he loved you. And while neither of you expected this second chance at togetherness to be easy, you hadn’t expected it to be so hard. —-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Vitya, What did I tell you about overworking yourself? Jayce and Father both sent word that you’re doing poorly, and it makes me worry whenever I’m away. I’m sorry I’ve not been able to write as much as I thought, but hopefully me being home for most of the week is enough. Speaking of that, the past two nights I’ve been holed up in a women’s shelter in Bilgewater trying to help the locals. It’s absolutely terrible here, Vik, and you know it’s never been that nice in this accursed town of lowlives. I’ve never seen this level of desperation; these women and some children are so scared, so beaten, so downtrodden, that I’m doing the best I can to find ways to get them out. You know Bilgewater is unfortunately a hotbed for human smuggling; trying to get someone out is proving much more difficult than trafficking someone IN because there are more enforcers of immoral law in this town than there are otherwise. Hence, holed up, with time to write. One of the new mothers urged me to do so after I told her about you; she said that life is fleeting and love should always be reminded, so in this downtime I’m scribbling this down. Funny she said that, right? It took us over seventeen years to come back to each other and I’ve thought we’d have just as long going forward, but her words spooked me a little bit. Just in case, I thought I’d let you know that I miss you sorely even though it’s been only two days since I last saw you. I’ll be home in two more days, I think; this trip was supposed to be just a supplies drop-off and check-in, but since we had to move to this new shelter location last-minute, it seemed better to help the staff get everyone settled in. I hope you’re not too lonely without me, because I also hope you’re not obsessing over your experiments when you’ve only just regained some energy. I told Jayce to barricade you from the lab outside of normal work hours, but I know he’s weak for you and probably didn’t do as I asked. Love, Sparrow —-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- On Viktor’s end, a sense of urgency exacerbated his stressors. He was beyond worried that he might not find a viable solution to his rapidly eroding lifespan – every time you were called away to run another gala for some far-away baron or to help establish aide centers, his attempts at serious discussion were put on pause. Viktor still hadn’t found a way to reveal to you that his days were numbered, though he was certain you were beginning to suspect that something was horribly, horribly wrong. He knew that every time you came to his apartment, whether it be for the second time that week after two back-to-back trips, or after a longer journey, you noticed the changes in his pallor. He’d told you it was simply the stress of trying to manage the lab during a period of tension with the undercity; he’d told you that he was trying to get through to Jayce, who seemed very hard of hearing for anyone but Mel’s advice in recent weeks. You were not convinced, but before you could object and sit Viktor down for a real conversation about his health, you would be whisked away again. You’d tried to contact Jayce, who seemed to avoid your eyes whenever you met, but he was incredibly busy as Councilor, and you figured if Viktor could barely get a hold of him, you certainly wouldn’t. With Jayce preoccupied was just Viktor now, for the most part – one man, toiling in a lab, with no-one to witness. And on the days you were home, the lab was completely empty. It was better, in Viktor’s eyes, to spend those precious hours with you in case, one day soon, there would be no more. He coughs now, a hideous sound that rattles his own bones. His handkerchief is at his mouth before a single drop of fluid can spray elsewhere; he’s practiced now, for better or for worse, and he hunches over as his body attempts to expunge itself of bloody sputum. Viktor has never cursed his lot before. Born and raised with his bum leg, it was as much a part of him as was his intelligence, his dry humor, and the dept of his ability to love. It simply was. But this? The permanent cold that seemed to settle in his joints? The aching pain that remained after each hacking-up? This was not him. This was Zaun’s curse, a byproduct of ‘progress,’ a poison that plagued the waters of the undercity and polluted its air. This was why Viktor pulled aside a promising, if misguided young researcher and defied his own mentor’s advice, putting the two men on a career trajectory that would change their lives… Well, life, Viktor thinks wryly. Not much has changed for him; he’s still a researcher, though now a professor in his own right, still assistant to a dean who would (now, certainly) outlive him, still far behind on the projects he so longed to create. At least the Hexclaw was useful; or would be, rather, if only the Council could stop bickering for one moment and start implementing technologies where they would improve lives most. Jayce words from mere months ago, spoken hours away from the Progress Day speech that widened the differences between them further, ring in Viktor’s ears still: “we stabilized the crystal, like they asked. Built the hexgates, like they asked. It’s our turn to decide the future of Hextech.” The future had been bright, then. It had been bright for all of a few hours, the future taken from them in the blink of an eye when an act of terrorism took not only a Gemstone and some of their research, but the lives of people as well. Since then, everything had gone to shit. He stares at his workbench, sitting a few feet away from the table, eyes gazing into the abyss if the abyss were a small, lively rune matrix that glowed in indigo light. His breathing is heavy; it hasn’t been fantastic ever since his fainting spell, though at least he experienced a small recovery (if he can call it that) and his lungs and heart stabilized enough for his doctors to lift his bed rest. (As far as you knew; Viktor, on the other hand, knew the truth – he’d cajoled his medical team to let him ‘live his last months a free man,’ if only to give you the illusion that he was getting better). The gemstone’s rune matrix almost chirps under the attention, runes shifting and sliding, repositioning themselves as the core gives a little frisson of movement. Viktor finds himself unable to pull away, mesmerized and compelled by the thing. There had to be a way to crack it; there must have been something that made it change colors from sapphire blue to dark amethyst a few weeks ago. He stands, the action winding him more than he’d like to admit. His lungs let out an unwilling grunt as he sags his weight into his crutch and makes his way towards his workbench. His eyes are heavy – they have been since his stint at the hospital; he wants to close them oh so desperately but he knows he risks never opening them again if he gives in to the exhaustion that strikes him at random. With tentative fingers, he reaches out to the rune matrix, wondering if – maybe – there was a more intimate way to connect with its magic. But a small part of him knows it’s not really his own inquiry; something about the rune matrix allures him now, draws him in, commands for Viktor to come close. A smaller part of his brain screams in warning, but he’s already moved his arm and he doesn’t have the spare energy to recoil. He thinks of you, of the future he wants to have, of the past he wished he could rewrite, of all the time wasted that he never got to have with you. The matrix hums appreciatively, twisting this way and that, and the light surrounding it intensifies. Viktor feels a pull of raw energy at his fingers. Then it hits him. It wants him. Or at least it wants something. He looks down, seeing the remainder of the stains from his blood on the table, and it occurs to him that the rune matrix can be connected with – it is compatible with bio-organic matter. He extends one fingertip, touching a corner of the faceted stone, and it expands in response. A pulse of something radiates from the gemstone’s matrix, and Viktor feels himself losing consciousness. When he comes to, slumped over his workbench with his leg brace stuck in a bent position, he coughs again – this time taking care to not contaminate the rune matrix for now. He looks down at his trembling hand – it’s intact, thankfully, so whatever ordeal must have happened, he survived it. Now, he has an answer. But like any good scientist, he wants a better dataset. Viktor stalks over to his chair, then jams the heel of his leg brace into the ground to release the bent joint and straighten his leg. He pushes off with this motion, wheeling himself towards the other side of the lab where a chalkboard has been half dusted-off. Sliding his fingers under the wood, he tilts the board a bit so he can write in the bottom half without vacating his seat. He twirls a nearly-gone stub of chalk between slender fingers, mind racing with a million theories. When he settles on one that seems to work, he strikes the board and begins to scribble. —-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Dearest Sparrow, How many weeks ago had your last letter been? A while now, it seems, because you’ve mostly been home — a fact I am grateful for. When you’re home, at least, I do make an effort to peel myself away from the lab. However, I must apologize for pulling the third of a few late nights running experiments while you’re orchestrating Madame Medarda’s gala in Noxus. (Transparency is preferred, correct)? Hopefully you won’t be too cross with me. It was important, I promise. I’ve simply needed to collect more data on a small revelation I had with the Hex crystal; it’s changed and I think I’m quite close to cracking the key. I know, I know— I’ll cut back my hours when you’re back home in a few days. But I thought it best to ask for forgiveness rather than to allow scientific discovery to pass me by. Jayce, for what it’s worth, hovers around me like a moth to a flame, and he’s gotten Mel to join in on a collective mothering. It does remind me to eat when I forget, though I’m proud to report that I’m much more diligent about it these days (I set an alarm with a small clock I’ve fashioned out of a scrap of Hex crystal. The noise is really quite annoying, so it’s hard to ignore). Let’s go out for some noodles at that little fateful shop after I come pick you up. I’ve been feeling much better as of late; I think it’s all the promise of nearly getting this rune matrix right. Don’t worry about me, Sparrow— focus on all the good you’re doing for this broken world. Your Love, Vitya —-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Viktor didn’t want to tell you about his diagnosis until he’d tested every possibility; he’d spent months now fiddling with the Hexcore (as he now called it), changing the rune functions and trying to come up with new ones – especially after it changed colors after his stint at the hispital. But the list of all possible permutations was starting to thin, and Viktor was starting to prepare himself for the thought that there might not be a way to utilize Hextech for augmentation or life extension after all. He kept trying, all this in spite of Heimerdinger’s fearful warning – all this, in direct rebellion to Heimerdinger’s orders to destroy the Hexcore. Jayce stepping in on his behalf had been unexpected, but strangely pleasing. It was reminiscent of their old days, tinkering together before he’d had his brace, back when a mere cane had been enough to support him. But the maelstrom that followed perplexed Viktor; he hadn’t anticipated Jayce to help oust the Head of the Council, much less a Head who had directly changed the course of both Hextech founders’ lives over a decade ago. Viktor saw his partner much less after that fateful demonstration, and Heimerdinger even less so. Without the Yordle at the helm, Jayce had more work to do – though, frankly, Viktor privately wondered if his good friend might be drowning in uncharted waters he had been ill-prepared to navigate. It was not that Jayce was unsupportive; in fact, with the revelation that the Hexcore responded to organic matter, Jayce had more of a bounce in his step – Viktor imagined it was because the prospect of possibly saving his life might have given the taller man a hope to latch onto. He knew Jayce struggled to make decisions, often making wildly impulsive ones after seemingly thorough rumination (the blockade at the bridge came bitterly to Viktor’s mind), but he still saw flashes of his friend’s younger, earnest self. It was nice to see his glimpses of this version of Jayce when the younger man stood up to Heimerdinger once more, refusing to destroy the Hexcore at the professor’s behest, then proclaiming that they’d go back to the drawing board to find a solution. Looking back, Viktor thinks he could see the same in his own past – sees his mid-twenties self brimming with enthusiasm. He remembers when there was more life to his face, more plumpness beneath his eyes and cheeks. He recalls days without his brace, dropping in on a crime scene and highly unregulated, unsanctioned science. He thinks back to a troubled researcher Talis almost ready to throw it all away, standing at a precipice before Viktor raised his voice with an innocent question of interruption. Viktor coughs now, ready with a handkerchief to catch his bloody phlegm, and wonders where it all went wrong – the research, his health, the cities’ futures… all of it. He leans back now, staring into the indigo light of the Hexcore, biting his lip as if doing so might lead to an answer. One arm slings over the back of his wooden, rolling stool; his long legs are stretched out in front of him. The weaker leg aches today. It tends to do that more when his mood is low and his mind is tired, especially on days when you’re far from him and the laboratory inbox is void of a letter from you for another day. The Hexcore hums and spins, the runes seemingly flighty and taunting, showing Viktor configurations that don’t result in any successes. His eyes drag over to where a thick stack of papers rustles slightly with every twist and shake the Hexcore makes; on these, lines and lines of handwritten rune functions are crossed out. Only a few sheets with to-be-tested permutations remain, and Viktor estimates that those will run out in a matter of days. He’ll have his answer then, he thinks, on whether he has any sort of chance at a life with you. But a part of him wonders if he already has his answer now; you’ve been his for only a few months, and they’ve been fraught with tension that perforates your happiness, or lined by absences that keep you apart when you’ve already wasted so many years not indulging in the other’s love. Did the two of you really ever have a future together? Viktor is not so sure, not with the struggle of overcoming the mountain between you that you started building seventeen years ago. But he knows you both want one, despite it all – your letters verify your stance, and his own conviction supports his. Armed with these two things, he continues to forge forward, with test after test, until his fingers are cramping from clutching at his workbench’ Hexcore controls, and until he’s down to his last few permutations.

#viktor arcane #viktor x reader #viktor arcane x reader #viktor x you #viktor arcane x you #viktor smut #viktor arcane smut #viktor arcane angst #viktor angst

75 notes · View notes

recentanimenews · 2 years

Text

Kaguya-sama: Love Is War – Ultra Romantic – 04 – The Eyes that Propelled Him

YUU CAN’T DIE

No sooner is Yuu shooting death lasers at Kashiwagi and her bae once they leave the office and talking about how students should be focused on their studies (stated while playing video games) than he’s melting into a puddle of goo when his crush, third-year Koyasu Tsubame stops by to drop off some foreshadowing…er, an application for the upcoming cultural festival.

I’m pleased as punch Tsubame is back, she and Yuu had great chemistry, and it was only near the end of that momentous sports fest arc that we even saw her eyes. But is Yuu simply infatuated with her because she’s nice to him, or does he have an actual chance? Ever the pessimist, he’s certain it’s the latter.

Kaguya won’t suffer Yuu’s moping about what can and can’t be done; she’s been in a slog of a romantic stalemate with her crush for over two damn cours, it’s as much sage advice as a warning that it’s best to come out and confess sooner rather than later. Unfortunately, Yuu’s “innate creepiness” has him imagining a flower-a-day at Tsubame’s desk or an album of himself with a note are good ways to do it.

Kaguya, as inept as she’d been with her own romance, continues to prove her value as an advisor to Yuu, steering him away from certain disaster and putting him on a long but doable path to not only making his feelings known to Tsubame, but realizing his potential to be someone Tsubame likes.

Since Yuu is neither strong, rich, or popular, Kaguya sends him on the path of academic achievement, assisting him in studying for the lofty goal of scoring in the top 50 of his grade in the upcoming exams. The next segment is tied to the first, as each of the other four StuCo members agree with Miyuki’s suggestion that they go on hiatus so that everyone can study from home.

Everyone is hiding ulterior motives (and A-1 faces): Miyuki can’t study in the office because he’s too distracted by Kaguya’s beauty; Kaguya can’t study at home because she’s too distracted by her new smartphone; Iino, like Kaguya, wants to keep her #1 ranking, and Chika…Chika already gets double allowance so she stands to lose the least here.

As for Yuu? No lies and no face; he’s already hard at work studying at home. But when the exams come and go and the rankings are posted, he doesn’t make it to the Top 50. Kaguya suspects he rose about 20 spots from his previous position near the bottom of his class. A tremendous improvement, but also a crushing defeat too.

Yuu pretends he’s not bitter about it to Kaguya and shuffles off to the boy’s room to stew in abject bitterness. Fortunately, Kaguya didn’t buy his act, and brazenly violates the bathroom rule to confirm that, indeed, Yuu is super pissed-off, and that he’ll take this small step forward as merely the loss of a battle for which expectations were naturally high. If love is war, losing this first battle can, and must, motivate him to keep fighting on.

Super Butler Herthaka-kun

With the show showering so much darma and character love on Yuu, who now has two potential love interests (like Miyuki with Kaguya and Ai), Chika is now, by default, the least developed and most mysterious member of the StuCo. Maybe that’s on purpose due to her simplistic nature, but one wonders if there will be room for her to have a major character-defining arc this season.

For now, she presents an open dinner invitation to Kaguya, Miyuki, and Kei in appreciation for their help and friendship. With exams out of the way, Kaguya is pumped up for a dinner party and sleepover, if for no other reason than the opportunity for Miyuki to nod off on her shoulder. She wants to do it that night, but Chika’s dad is out of town.

Chika suggests an alternate site for the sleepover: Kaguya’s place! There, Chika is met by “Herthaka-kun”, Ai’s…(deep breath) gay-male-crybaby-war orphan-Harvard graduate butler persona. While Kaguya scolds Ai for weaving such rococo lies, Chika simply stands in awe of “Super Butler Herthaka-kun”…yet another potentially awesome Kaguya spin-off.

Kaguya and Chika proceed to have a lovely girls night together, and while Miyuki and Kei can’t make it to the sleepover, they are offered a window into it when Chika calls him up. She’s able to do this not only without Kaguya’s objection but her encouragement because Kaguya rarely stays up past 11, and Chika’s prattle has now kept her up past midnight.

This has the effect of rendering Kaguya into a state not dissimilar from drunkenness, where her usual inhibitions drop and her judgment is compromised. She’s in full Go-with-the-Flow Mode, so Chika FaceTimes Miyuki and asks him straight-up if he’s in love with someone.

Kei happens to be in the room when Miyuki receives the call, and becomes fully engaged in the conversation when she spots Kaguya and Chika-nee on his screen. After adorably picking up the place even though they’re not there, Kei confirms to Chika that her brother is definitely in love, because he’s always LINEing with “someone named “Herthaka.”

When Chika hears this name, and she turns to face Herthaka-kun the butler, who is presently texting, her nose bleeds and she excuses herself from the segment.

That leaves Kaguya and Miyuki on the call together. Kaguya sleepily declares her furiousness at him right now for sending texts to someone else, but says she’ll forgive him if he tells her who he’s in love with. When he hesitates, she says she’ll go first…only to fall asleep before saying the name.

Miyuki is left with female Herthaka on his screen telling him Kaguya is asleep and she’s hanging up, but not before Kei gets a good look at the girl her bro is apparently courting. Kaguya wins the round because despite her fatigue she doesn’t let slip who she loves, but in my book both she and Miyuki lose the round because they’re still stuck in an endless slog.

Maybe the cultural festival will progress things further. I’m not saying I need a confession from either or both of them for this season to be a success—it’s the ride, not the destination that counts, and this is the Rolls-Royce of rides—but it would be nice for these two to join Takagi and Nishikata in the “Official-At-Last” corner.

By: sesameacrylic

#Anime #News #RABUJOI – An Anime Blog

1 note · View note

sunsetbois · 2 years

Text

YB stands for your baby

In which the horny man himself is dead set on achieving his dream... whether you like it or not.

Warnings: Peter it dark af, forced pregnancy and of course non con with a dash of gore also some dissasociation.

---

You had made a mistake in the beginning by admitting you didn’t want children- his, none the less. From that day forward you paid the price in the form of two imprecise stumps where your arms had been. He had said “for your own good,” but you really know that your fighting had been the breaking point. Now you couldn't fight back, nor push him away.

Now, your mouth seemed to get you into more trouble. “I'll find a way to abort it, you asshole!”

“I'd like to see you fucking try, Darling.” He spat from above your folded over form on the dirty mattress.

Sweat rolled down your sore spine hovering in the air as his vicious grip on your hovering hips brought you back down to meet his relentless hips. A brutal slap met the air each time.

It wasn't the first time he had came inside- at least to your knowledge.

A clean funnel remained in its new home on the bedside table for when you were actively being a brat towards him. Countless times he had punished you by refusing you an orgasm as he spilled his contents into your funnel filled pussy.

The cold of his bony hips dug deep into your elevated ass cheeks, still burning from the spanking he delivered earlier. You whimpered when he used his thumb to stimulate your clit. It was not a coincidence that he knew just how to please you, shamelessly admitting to you one night how he liked to “play,” with you in your sleep. After that confession, you soon learned that nothing was ever coincidence on his part.

Now here he was, making you a reluctant moany mess bellow him as he buried himself back inside your warm and quivering cunt. You didn't want this.

Peter moaned loudly as you screamed once more, unloading his warm, thick cum as deep as your body would allow him. It was useless to try and push him out, not when he overwhelmed your tired body entirely. The squeezing did nothing but add to the lewd cacophony rolling out from his monstrous mouth as he called you all of the sweetest names in the book, like you were sugar personified.

Coming down from his high, he painted softly before smiling down at you gently, with a warmth you didn't quite find so adorable anymore.

“Now you can never leave me darling.” His wandering palm pressed softly over where your uterus would be and rubbed gently. “Not with my bun in your oven.” He leaned down, giving your numb lower half a little relief as he buried his face in your exposed neck. “Just mine, all mine, completely and utterly mine. Oh how I can't wait to see your tummy grow for me.” He cooed in his sickly sweet tone.

Tears ran down your cheeks when he lowered you back down completely. You begged whatever deity you could that he would never succeed. He may have you forcefully here in body, but if he were to get his wish... he may be able to steal your carefully hidden mental state for himself. There was no where else you'd rather be and with a dependant to look out for- an innocent dependant you had no other choice than to give up your delusions of reality.

That you were stuck in a lonely basement of the man who had been stalking you for longer than you cared to ask him. And not...

The crumbly yet homely apartment with Lulu...

Taking a walk..

In the park, watching your favourite view of the baby ducks... oh how soft they looked as they waddled with their mother.

Your bedroom, with the heart wallpaper, the nice rug you had gotten from the local thrift store that seemed oh so soft after every shift your returned. The lone flower that you were able to maintain for a short while before needing to replace with the exact same type. Your books all lined up neatly by your bed. Classicals, childish horrors and self help books from where you felt motivated but forgot entirely to read them.

You were broken from your dreams as the heavy footsteps approached once more.

“Now~ to seal the deal.” He chuckled darkly, returning with a thick heavy cushion, a rather large penis shaped plug and a long, scratchy length of rope.

Fuck.

You wept harder as he approached to “seal the deal,” knowing full well what it meant in his vague implication. There was not much fighting to be done with your arms being useless, tender, and bandaged stumps that could not move without the blossoming pain of healing skin. Instead you tried to push yourself away with the trembling weight of your legs. You failed drastically as he was quick to yank you back down the mattress by your ankle.

“Now be good for me darling, and I'll give you a reward.” The cushion met your backside, allowing gravity to aid the depraved dreams of the depraved man tying your legs and hips in a way to keep the cushion there. He ducked out of the way just in time as you tried to wiggle out of your restraints.

“Maybe some fresh air, perhaps? Or perhaps, those snacks, you've been craving so recently~”

#your boyfriend #peter your boyfriend #yourboyfriendgame #your boyfriend peter #yb fandom #yb y/n #yb peter #peter yb #your boyfriend game #your boyfriend visual game #your boyfriend visual novel #This one is dark folks #minors dni #no minors allowed #minors do not interact #Peter is the warning

78 notes · View notes

shiraishi-mai · 3 years

Text

[10:00pm]

"I will still always love you."

'I didn't say anything," you said, leaning against the brick wall. Your eyes were focused on the orange and red leaves that crunched under your shoes.

"I think I know how you feel. I know how I would feel."

You ignored the stinging in your eyes. How could he know when even you didn't know how you felt? There was a strange something bubbling in your chest. Why did you feel this way? Why did it feel as though your breath was knocked out of you when you saw the invitation with curly silver writing beautifully written on the white envelope. You were happy for him. He deserved the best the world had to offer and you always knew that this was bound to happen. After all, he was never yours to begin with.

"I'm happy for you." You tried to keep the hurt out of your voice and gave him a small smile. Suga walked over to lean against the wall beside you. His lips were pursed and you knew he saw right through you. After all, he was probably the only person who knew you inside out.

"You know, I imagined it before. Whenever you dated someone new, I thought about how it would feel if you got married." He exhaled.

"And it bothered me more than I thought it would. More than it should have. I think I would still mind, even now, in some awful, possessive way." He sighed and looked up at the night sky. "We've never been with each other in that way and it's not like we made any promises."

We both heard the 'but'.

"We knew this would happen," you finally said. "We chose different paths a long time ago."

There was silence. You thought about all the years Suga stood by your side. Always looking out for you, always supporting you. He was your first kiss, the shoulder you cried on many times, and the first face you looked for when you achieved something. He was your best friend and at one point in your life, he was home.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

A familiar figure walked up to them.

"Y/n?" The boy wore a light, pale sweater with brown khakis and white shoes. His grey hair was a bit tousled and his confused expression mirrored yours.

You whipped around with an accusing glance at your friend who flinched a little under your gaze.

"So it turns out the guy's friend couldn't come...and you and Aera wouldn't come out unless we all went on a date together." Your friend had complained she would leave high school without ever getting a boyfriend and somehow organised this mess that you only agreed to to get her to stop begging.

"SO YOU CALLED SUGA?" you exclaimed.

"Standing right here," he said, putting his hand up. "I am also shocked, thanks for asking."

"You could have just told me he canceled," you muttered, "It's not like I was super excited to do this." Your friend's face was sheepish and her eyes slid over to Suga who had an odd expression on his face. He walked over in front of you and lowered his face, an impish grin replacing the expression.

"Aw come on, is going on one date with your best friend so bad? It'll be the same as hanging out, plus I'm a perfect gentleman." His tone was light and teasing. You rolled your eyes and let out a breath in relief that he wouldn't take this seriously.

Though, you still felt your heart skip a beat when his grinned widened as you agreed.

"Just this one time."

[later]

The girls stared at their respective boys, unimpressed. Your friend's date punched the air and they high-fived each other while Suga and Asahi stared at the ground in shame.

"How can you two of all people be bad at this?" You said flatly.

The scoreboard of the basketball hoop arcade game flashed a 60 while Asahi and Suga had made a measly 10 and 15.

"We're volleyball players, not basketball!" Suga exclaimed.

"I don't think your hand eye coordination should be THAT bad."

The boys grumbled and you and your friends giggled. Suga refused to look at you as you all walked outside of the building into the park after that. Exasperated at his silent treatment, you dragged him over to the ice cream cart as an apology for making fun of him.

"What did you get?"

"Chocolate. What about you?"

"Strawberry," you said happily. "It's really good! Do you want to try?" You held out your cone. He leaned down to take a bite and found himself with ice cream on his face instead.

"First you make fun of me, and then you attack me with ice cream." He shook his head. "Some date you are."

"That's what they always do on dates on TV. It looked fun so I wanted to try."

He gave her a sly grin. "You know, the guy usually gets her back."

You yelped as you attempted to scamper away but a strong arm caught your waist and you struggled to escape. You saw the cone get closer to your face and shrank back - closing your eyes and scrunching up your face.

But the cold sensation never came. Instead, you felt a soft pair of lips peck your cheek and your eyes widened as you turned to look at him.

"You scared me! I thought-" Ice cream was suddenly on your nose. Suga laughed, clutching his stomach. "Your face, oh my god."

You couldn't help but smile at the delight on his face.

When he finally straightened up, your eyes locked and he looked at you with a soft expression. You didn't know when he had started to make your heart pound and your face burn. Maybe it was when he had gently put on a bandaid on the scrape on your knee (he claims to carry a few since you're so clumsy) and briefly swiped his thumb over the plastic, or rubbed your hands and blew on them in the winter, or carried you to your bed when you fell asleep studying together.

He had confessed to you in your second year. You had frozen, unsure of what to do, before blurting out that you didn't feel the same before you could process his words. You had slid down your locker after he waved bye with a smile on his face, saying "no hard feelings", and went to practice. Your thoughts raced. You knew him for such a long time, it would ruin your friendship to date him, right? You couldn't bear to hurt him or end up fighting with him. And besides, when both of you discussed your futures, he had been surprised that you wanted to move out of Miyagi while you were surprised he wanted to stay.

Is this what it would have been like? You thought, as you both sat with your head on his shoulder and his on top of yours. You relished in his warmth and he had a faint smell of laundry detergent. Both of you stared out at the river, enjoying the quiet of the night.

Your hands were intertwined and placed on your lap. Every time you opened your mouth to say something, you found you didn't have the words.

"I made my decision. I'm going to leave after graduation." You finally said.

"Okay," he said softly.

"Like leaving the country."

"Okay." He repeated.

"I don't know when I'll come back."

"Okay."

You squeezed his hand tighter as your eyes suddenly filled with moisture. You peeked at his face to see he was staring at the bright bridge lights with a neutral face and you turned back to look at them too. You heard him quietly take a breath.

"I love you."

You pressed your lips together to keep them from trembling.

"Okay," you said.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"In the next life?" You finally turned to look at him. His grey eyes twinkled with humour and mischief. He may have grown taller and changed throughout the years, but his eyes always stayed the same. You both had joked about what you would do if you were born again and agreed that you would meet again.

"In the next life," you replied. "I promise I won't leave you. Ever." You clenched your jaw.

He chuckled. "I'll hold you to it."

The silence between you two as you stared at each other lasted for a brief few seconds but felt so heavy and your nails dug into your palms.

"Come on," he finally said, holding out his hand, "let's go back inside."

#haikyuu angst #haikyuu x reader #sugawara angst #sugawara x reader #hq sugawara #sugawara kōshi #sugawara fic #haikyuu #hq angst #hq x reader #idkwhatthisis #notproofread #iuseokayalot #allicanaskfor

82 notes · View notes

myafterlifeisbetterthenyours · 3 years

Note

How about a part two of Stella x owl reader? Fights between Stolas and Stella have become increasingly rare and his mood is improving, Stolas decides to ask about, unlike Stolas, Stella knows very well how to keep her piece of paradise a secret for now. Until one day y/n decides to visit Stella under the guise of business and to give his dear little owl a "luxury massage session", but things get a little out of hand when Stolas is caught with Blitzo. (you can ignore it if you want)

Stella with her Secret Owl demon S/O

Stella, for the first time in weeks, was having a good day.

They had actually become far more common in the weeks since your confession.

She had found herself being far less stressed as of late. So much so, she had only hadn't had a fight with Stolas in a full week.

She was relaxing in her study, enjoying a good cup of tea.

She was reminiscing on your night together, the next morning you had given her a small stack of letters.

They were all addressed to her, the condition of some of them implied they were written many years ago.

It only took a single letter for her to realise they were love letters.

Dozens of them.

She took her time, pouring over each letter. Taking in every word and detail. Emotions swelling in her chest as she read each one.

It was perhaps the most romantic thing she had ever seen.

The letters acted much like a record of your feeling for her.

It started from your more innocent affection for her as a child, all the way into your growing feeling for her in your youth, when you realised your feelings for her were beyond friendship.

And into your discovery of her betrothal to Stolas.

You poured your heart into each letter, telling her everything. Everytime you thought of her, how much you missed her, berating yourself for not just telling her how much you loved her.

You wrote about how much it pained you to remember you'd never get to tell her how much he loved her.

It was a roller-coaster of emotions. Some letters made her laugh. Others brought her to tears.

And by the end, she was clutching the letters to her chest. Her chest swollen with emotion as she experienced so many emotions all at once.

Her marriage with Stolas was... less than voluntary. The whole union being mostly political, arranged by there parents.

She had hoped love would bloom after Octavia's birth. But it hadn't, and after that she knew love was not meant to be.

But you, you genuinely loved her, for her.

You dedicated your life to being worthy of her.

You didn't want her for her status or wealth, you wanted her, for her.

She cood to herself dreamily, fantasising about your time together.

Her fantasising was cut short when there was a neck on her study door.

She quickly placed the letters into her draw before asking who it was.

Much to her surprise, it was none other then Stolas who entered her office. Her 'husband' looked about nervously, rightfully so, she supposed as he stepped in.

'Hello, uh, Stella.' He said nervously 'may I talk to you for a moment.'

Stella had a colourful collection of words she wanted to use at him. But instead she simply asked 'What do you want?'

Stolas cleared his throat, clearly not surprised by her callous tone.

Taking a few steps he began 'I've noticed this past few weeks you've been less... confrontation.' Stella's eyes narrowed, but she held her tongue.

'And I was just thinking, if perhaps we could come to an agreement.'

That actually peaked her interest. 'What kind of agreement?' She asked warily.

Stolas looked thrilled she hadn't thrown him out yet. 'Well, I was thinking we could put our differences aside, put the whole incident between us behind us. FOr Octavias sake.' He quickly cut in. 'Our constant arguing has taken quite the toll on her.'

Stella clenched her hands, he claws digging into her palm. 'For octavias sake...?' she asked incredulously.

Rage swelled in her chest 'How fucking dare you!' She told him through a scowl.

She pointed an angry finger at him. 'You, YOU! Cheat on me! Betray our marriage. Betray our family. And you want me to act like nothing happened. "For Octavia's sake"?'

She stood up, she couldn't even look at him. 'You disgust me. Tell me, would you give up your little fucking Imp? If it would make everything like it was, would you give him up?'

Stolas didn't answer, instead opting to look off to the side. Stella just sighed, shaking her head.

'Your a selfish, pathetic coward. Hiding behind your own daughter, what a disgrace.'

Before she could tell him to get out, there was a knock at the door. 'Who is it?' She shouted.

The door opened slowly, revealing one of the palace Imps. 'What do you want?' She asked harshly.

'T-theres a Lord (Y/N) here to see you. They say it's a business matter.'

Stella instantly perked up, holding back a smile as she rose to her feet. 'Thank you. I shall greet them personally.'

Getting up she walked past Stolas, not even bothering to give him a second glance.

She made her way to the entrance, and much to her annoyance, Stolas had seemingly decided to follow her, for some reason.

She quickly made it to the entrance, you were waiting there, anxiously adjusting your attire.

Hearing her approach you turned, your face lit up when your eyes layed apon her, Only for it to instantly dull upon seeing Stolas.

Still wearing a smile, you reached forward and took her hand before planted a gentle kiss upon it.

'Lady Stella. Its a pleasure to see you after so long. You still look as enchanting as when we were children.' You tell her, sending butterfly's through her stomach.

The moment was sullied when Stolas but in, 'Children?' The butterflies in her stomich instantly falling dead. 'Do you know each other?' He asked.

Before Stella could speak, you cut in 'Me and Stella were childhood friends.' You told him extending your hand. 'Its been some time since we've met in person.'

Stolas took your hand, giving it a firm shake. 'Is that so? Stella never mentioned you.'

'Well until recently' you rolled your head, your smile just holding back a scowl. 'I was beneath notice. I've only achieving my status relatively recently.'

'I was from a lower house, you see, a vassel of her family. And through that, me and Stella became friends.' You gave her a warm look, staring for several moments.

Stolas went to ask another question but Stella cut him off. 'You had business to discuss, did you not (Y/N)?' She asked.

You snapped to her, delighted to not have to talk to Stolas any further.

'Yes, i do' you said happily 'I believe a mutually beneficial arrangement could be made, between our houses.

'Excellent' she proclaims happily. 'It been so long since we've had any real business. And perhaps we could use the chance to catch up. It has been far too long.'

You looked at her fondly, before Stella turned, signalling for you to follow.

You did, turning to Stolas as you left 'It was a pleasure to meet you, your highness.' You told him, the slightest hint of disdain in your voice.

The two of you made your way to her study, you opening the door for her, giving a slight bow as she entered.

She giggled at your antics, before you followed her in, shutting the door behind you.

As soon as the door shut Stella instantly spun around and pinned you to the door, locking you in a heavy kiss.

'You have no idea how much I've wanted to do that.' Stella told you, after breaking the kiss.

You just chuckled before raising an eyebrow, 'oh, i think I do.' You told her playfully.

Stella just giggled, giving you a peck on the cheek. Pulling away she got up and went over to her desk.

You followed close behind, wrapping her in a hug. 'Now, now (Y/N), we have business to attend to.' She told you, patting your arm.

You just chuckled, 'Stella, I didn't really come here for business. I came to spend time with you.'

Stella was a little taken aback, mostly for not seeing it, as on reflection it was quite obvious.

Kissing her neck you slid your hands onto her shoulders, gently rubbing the muscles around her muscle.

Stella moaned at your touch, this only emboldened you, as your hands rubbed deeper and rougher.

Digging your fingers into her shoulder muscles. Stella released a flurry of moans, gripping her desk as you worked over her shoulder blades.

You moved down her spine, slowly undoing her dress as you went.

Reaching the bottom she turned to you, moving her shoulders, her dress fell, leaving her in all her natural glory.

You took her then and there, the two of you wrapped in passion, you held nothing back, releasing years of passion.

When stella became more vocal, you tried to get her quiet down, in fear ztolas might catch you.

As you got rougher, she just cried out 'I want him to hear!'

You went on for a while, after you finished, you held Stella close, the Owl demon curled up on your lap.

You preened your lover, running your hands all across her body before gently plucking any feather you didn't deem worthy to stay on your perfect mate. Afterwards the two of you got dressed.

You meticulously inspecting Stella, head to toe, ensuring she was perfectly groomed from head to toe.

The two of you leaft her study, ensuring no evidence of your little escapade was left behind.

The small collection of Stella's feathers, were delicately placed in your coat pocket.

You followed her into the garden, strolling through the large hedges that sat behind the Goetia palace.

Confident you where alone, you held Stella close, sharing a public display of affection.

You made it deep into the hedges, finding yourself beneath a large tree. It was a beautiful reminder that there was still life in hell.

You took her hand, you lead her beneath the trees majesty.

You pushed your body against hers, pinning her to the tree as you locked your lips with her's.

As you deepened the kiss, The distinct sound of snaping twigs drew your attention.

Snapping your head to face the noise, you found its source.

An Imp had fallen through the hedge, leaving a large hole in his stead.

You locked eyes with the Imp and sighed, 'well, this won't end well' you thought.

The Imp seem to think the same thing, before you both exclaimed 'Well, Fuck!'

Thanks for the request. I really love writing for both Stolas and Stella, as I feel there just isn't enough story centred around them as individuals. It always about there family or Stolas and Blitzø. But I really enjoyed the request. I hope you enjoyed.

#helluva boss #helluva boss headcanon #x reader #headcanon #helluva stolas #helluva boss x reader #helluva stella

168 notes · View notes

trimisu · 3 years

Text

Inseparable (Sugawara x reader)

Summary: You and Sugawara were best friends since middle school, everyone says that you two are inseparable, always in your own little worlds that the both of you only understands. But a day will come when life will separate you two from each other, will you two still be inseparable?

Warnings: I guess angst? And fluff?

A/n: first time writing a fanfic here in Tumblr ( ╹▽╹ ) so forgive me because this one will be a long one lol. This was supposed to be an angst about you and sugawara's arguing but I couldn't think why you were both fighting so I just write whatever comes to my head.

Adds: (f/d) - favorite dessert

Masterlist

✧◝(⁰▿⁰)◜✧

You met Sugawara in middle school, you don't remember how Sugawara became your best friend, consider the fact you're not very talkative. Maybe because of his kind nature that made you comfortable being around him? Or the fact that he doesn't seem intimidating like the other kids were?

All you remember was that this boy, this handsome, smart silver-haired boy, always sat next to you in class, and in just a blink of an eye, he became part of one of the most important people in your life.

You two are practically inseparable, there's not a single day that both of you didn't cling to each other after each class. Sugawara's and your family know that, even the whole class knows that. Because of this, his mother and your mother thought that there might be a chance that you two might become a thing.

As for your classmates, many amounts of girls will come and hand you a bunch of gifts and love letters, asking you to give them to Sugawara and ask him about his feelings about them. You got so fed up that you always rejected to help them and say the same thing all over again.

"How about you try to approach and confess your feelings to him than making me do all the work?" Your eye twitched at them.

"I-I can't do that! You're the only one I know that can help me!"

"Sorry, but I can't help you, if you want to confess your feelings to Sugawara, then gather up the courage and just do it," you cross your arms, and tap your index finger to your arm, wishing that this will end quickly.

"I-I heard you like (f/d)! If you help me bring this to–"

"No means no!"

After many persuasions from them and rejections from you, they gave up and just stomp away.

Meanwhile, Sugawara also experiences the same thing, but just a few. He helps them deliver the letters or gifts, knowing in the end, you'll reject them.

"Hm? A love letter? From who?" You grabbed the love letter and inspect the envelope.

"A guy from our class asked me to deliver this to you, he also asked me to tell him what you think about him," He said as he stared at your blank expression. He knows that you will reject it due to your parents. They don't permit you and your siblings to enter into a relationship while studying. They wanted you to finish your schooling and achieve your dreams before jumping into a relationship.

"Tell them the same thing I told you last time," you sighed as you threw away the letter to a nearby trash can, without considering opening and reading the letter. Oh, you should've noticed the look on your best friend's face; pure happiness.

The next day when Sugawara and the boy, who made him send the love letter, meet, Sugawara will tell him what exactly you said, he even felt proud inside his heart when he saw the boy slumped down, feeling heartbroken.

As time went on, you two graduated middle school with proud smiles on both of your faces. Sadly, both of you won't be entering the same high school due to your parents persuade you to enroll in Aoba Johsai instead. Sugawara felt heartbroken after hearing that you wouldn't be in the same school as he is, but still wish you good luck in your new school.

You two are just hanging out in his room, just playing UNO. Though the original plan was to hang out in your house, but, because your dog just gave birth to her puppies, your mom was scared that your dog might see Sugawara as a threat to her puppies and might bite him. So, both of you agreed to hang out at his place.

"K-Koushi...?" You stuttered after you place down a color red 7 to the large stack on the floor.

"Hm?" He looked up wondering why you stuttered and noticed the sad look on your eyes, "what's wrong (N/n)? Why'd you look sad?"

"What school are you going to...?" You asked, not wanting to meet his eyes.

"Karasuno High, why?"

"I might not go to the same high school as you..." Sugawara felt heartbroken after hearing that his best friend won't attend the same school as him, his mouth was agape and just stared at you as you continue, "My family persuades me to go to Aoba Johsai because both of my siblings study there..."

You held the cards a little tight unknowingly, as you look at him, "I-I told them that I don't wanna go there and I want to attend the same school as you... but–"

Sugawara placed his hand on your knee, gently caressing your skin, he looked at you with a reassuring smile and said, "Hey, it's alright... Maybe your parents made you enroll there because they saw how the school took care of your siblings and helped them to get them where they are today. Plus, maybe they saw how they teach that's why they wanted you to study there," you just stay quiet a bit before opening your mouth to speak.

"I'm scared Koushi..."

"About what?"

"What if the moment we enter high school, our friendship will slowly drift away...? You know, like not talking to each other anymore, no calls, no texts, nothing at all! And... And if we meet each other again, what if things become awkward between us? Just simple greetings and being engulfed by the uncomfortable atmosphere after because we have nothing to talk about!" You were scared of losing him, what if your assumptions are all correct? Then you'll be feeling lonely because you and Sugawara aren't the same as before.

He stared at you with concern, "I know it's scary to think of that but..." His hand makes his way up to your cheek caressing it the same way how he caressed your knee, "don't worry, that won't happen... You will always and forever be my best friend because we're like two peas in a pod that can't be separated!" He held up two fingers and gave you a cheeky grin, which made you giggle a little.

"Plus, if that ever happens, I will gladly let you whack my brain because I let my best friend down," he pouts like a child with his arms cross as you laugh.

"Stop that, you look cuter than me!"

"Why, don't lie! You look cuter than me!" He exclaimed, "Oh, and by the way," you stopped laughing as you watched him place down a +4 wild card and raised his last card at you with a smirk,

"Uno!"

The first day of school rolled around, and the first day that you and Sugawara weren't clinging to each other like the old days. You were sad by that fact, yes, but you also remember that there will be a day that you have to let him go as he moves forward and achieves the things he dreams in his life. You look at the window, one seat away from you, as you daydream just by the thought of your best friend.

His smile, his kind nature, and every little thing he does for you, like sharing with you his lunch when your dad was too lazy to cook, or the time when he closed all the windows and curtains inside his room as he covers your ears with earphones and his pillow, giving you one of his warm hugs, every time there's a thunderstorm going on outside.

You snapped back to reality when you felt your cheek hurt from all that smiling, you even felt your heart beats faster and your face was burning when you were just thinking of your best friend. Then something clicked into your head.

'Is it like one of those romance shows...? Am I in love with my best friend?' You shook your head until a chocolate brown-haired boy came into your view, waving his hands at your eyes.

"Miss? Are you alright?"

Sugawara Koushi fell for his best friend in their 2nd year of middle school. It surprised him at first, he thought it was just a small crush that will go away eventually, but the moment their 2nd year ended, it made it clear that he was actually in love with you.

He loves the way you laugh, even if you think you sound like a dying seal, he thinks it's beautiful because he knows you were having fun. He also loves the way you smile, and the way your eyes sparkle every time you guys talk, like how your voice sounds so excited when you mention to him about the romance thriller comic you recommended him to read, and giving out one of your theories about the characters in the story. He loves the way you trusted him completely, not hesitating for a second to tell him your thoughts that you tend to have every time you overthink. It made him believe that you are very important to him.

But what Sugawara truly loves about you is that you are just you. Just (Y/n) (L/n). The smart, loving, and wonderful best friend he always cherishes since the start of middle school. Every single thing you do to him sends warmth inside his heart, it made him smile.

He wanted to call you his, waking up every single morning to see your beautiful face and the last thing he'll see before sleeping. He wanted to be with you and call him yours forever.

He remembers that he would always have the happiest smile plastered on his face every time you turn down a confession. It made him feel that he might have a chance to be with you, but another thought came to mind every time that maybe you did this because you aren't allowed to have a relationship while studying, or maybe you aren't ready at all.

Even worse, he thinks that you only see him as a best friend that you completely trust.

But the memory that is always stuck to his head is the one conversation before the first day of high school. The time where you were so scared to lose him. He would be lying if he said it doesn't bother him at all, it scared him too. Still, after that conversation, it did make him realize that you can't be with him forever. Clinging to him as you used to when you feel scared or uncomfortable with something, dropping to his house uninvited, and hanging out with him at every random day of the week.

Yes, many people would say both of you are inseparable, always inside of your own little worlds that the both of you would only understand. But the day will come when life will separate you both, whether because of your jobs, lovers, or going somewhere far away from where the both of you wouldn't be able to feel each other's warmth.

He pushed those negative thoughts away and focused on the present relationship you both have. Being best friends with you, or having a relationship with you doesn't change the fact that he still loves you and will support you every step of the way.

He looked at the stage of the auditorium in front of him, where the principal gave his speech to all of the students of Karasuno and whispered to himself the words he told you, "Because we're two peas on a pod..." We're inseparable.

Years went by, and you two are now in your last year of high school. Things are getting hard, you and Sugawara couldn't hang out like before due to the amount of homework you both received, not to mention the clubs you both joined. The only day you two could relax from the workload is Saturday, sometimes Monday if your best friend's workload lessened a bit.

You both are just chilling in his room, yet changed again due to your uncle coming home from abroad and you don't want your uncle to bombard you with any questions, and you are not in the mood to experience your uncle's attitude. So you and Sugawara agreed to hang out in his instead.

"How's your team holding up?" Sugawara asks as you spin his wheelchair around to face him. He remembered that day when he was so ecstatic when he saw you in the gymnasium.

"(N/n)!!" He ran up to you and gave you a tight hug. You hugged back, giving the same tight hug.

Oh man, both of you missed this so much.

His team had a dumbfounded look on their faces when he saw their vice-captain hugging a random girl. Tanaka and Nishinoya even whispered to each other that you might be Sugawara's girlfriend.

"What are you doing here? Wait, are you here to support me?" The giddy silver-haired boy's eyes sparkled at the sight when he heard you laugh. His hands went to your cheeks and gave it a light pinch, "Aww~ (N/n), I feel so happy~"

You giggled, "Well, you're half right," he stops pinching you and looks at you in confusion, "What?" You raised an eyebrow as you chuckle.

"What do you–" he noticed the clothes you were wearing, it's a tracksuit of Seijoh, "Are you... A manager?"

"I didn't tell you? Whoops," you laughed at his shock reaction.

"(L/n)-san!" You turn back your head to the source of the voice, which belongs to Iwaizumi. He signals you that he needed help, assuming that Oikawa went somewhere, so you sighed.

"That bastard of a captain..." You muttered to yourself as you exhaled again, "Sorry Kou, I need to cut our conversation short."

"Oh no, it's fine! Good luck with your team, (N/n)!" He scratched the back of his head.

"Thanks, and good luck with yours also!" You ran off in Iwaizumi's direction, helping him finding Oikawa.

He still remembers that his whole team, mostly Tanaka, Nishinoya, and Hinata, bombarded him with questions about you.

"Bumped out," you sighed, "But, you know, it's kinda sad to see them like this, mostly the 3rd years... Even from Oikawa..." You frowned at the memory when your whole volleyball team had the look of defeat and disbelief on their faces after being beaten by Karasuno's volleyball team.

"But hey, when I saw you guys defeated Shiratorizawa, I feel so happy for you guys," You chuckled at the last part.

"Well, we did our best after all," he smiled at you, "plus, we could finally play in the nationals for the first time in years!" You giggled at his behavior.

'He's like a child, showing his mother one of his accomplishments in the game,' your smile grew wider at that thought.

"You can do it, Koushi! You have my full support!" You fist-bumped the air as he did the same.

"Yeah! Oh, will you be watching us play?"

"I will, but I'll just watch the live broadcast. So, better kick their asses before I kick yours!"

"Of course," he teased as you both laugh.

And you did watch him, you watched the live broadcast through your phone. You actually watched them with Iwaizumi in the gym while Oikawa was busy improving his volleyball skills.

"Oi, Captain-kawa! Take a break for a while and watch this match!" You called for the chocolate-haired boy, practicing his serves.

The only response you receive was the ball bouncing off the floor and his shoes squeaking.

"Don't you want to see your kouhai play against Kamomedai?"

The name of that school perked his ears. The Kamomedai High School? He heard that the school was known for its blocking skills and it was the best among the nation. Oikawa quickly stops what he was doing and plopped down to your side as he watched the match.

"Concern about your kouhai?" You teased him as he growled lightly.

"No... I wanna see how this match plays out!" He scorned as he watched intently, before muttering, "Kamomedai High is known for their blocking skills, so I wonder how they will pull that off," You stared at him, anxiety creeping inside of you.

'What happens if they lose?' You shook your head and drive those thoughts away, 'Stop thinking of that... Koushi's team will win... Have faith in them!'

"Hm? Tobio's partner isn't there?" Oikawa blinks as he didn't see any sight of Hinata.

"Partner? Oh! The orange-haired kid! I wonder why too..."

"You didn't watch the beginning of this match?"

"No, I was–" you were cut off by the announcer's voice. Your thoughts were correct. They've lost.

After you heard from your best friend's mother that her son is already home, you make sure to cheer him up. You brought some card games and his favorite food.

Sugawara was surprised to see you barging in to his room with his favorite food and some games at your hands, shouting, "Operation: Cheer up Kou-kun begins!". He was planning to tell you that he arrived home but looks like his mother beats him to it. Nevertheless, he was thankful to have you by his side.

You gave the silver-haired boy his favorite food with a reassuring smile on your face, "here you go, Koushi, you did amazing," you watched his eyes sparkle in delight when he saw what you gave him.

"Super Spicy Mapo Tofu?! Gee, thanks a bunch (N/n)!" He quickly opened the package and grabbed the chopsticks you gave to him, and quickly ate down the food.

"Anything for you, Koushi~" You blushed when you look at his facial expression. He's so adorable.

A few words exchange here and there, but still surrounded by the comfortable silence you both know and love. After he devoured the food completely, you two lay down on his bed and enjoy the silence surrounded by his room.

Not until Sugawara spoke up, "Just a blink of an eye, we're already graduating" You hummed in response.

"What are you going to do after graduation?" You asked as you shifted your body to face Sugawara. You examined his face, his beautiful, shiny, hazel eyes filled with so full of life. His mole is perfectly placed under his left eye.

The silver hair that you always love to play with, you love the feeling of his soft hair brushes against your fingers.

"Hmm, I was thinking of going to college to pursue education," his lips formed into his signature gentle smile, and chuckled. The smile you always love, the one that never fails to make your heart flutter. His angelic voice filling the whole room, "What about you? What will you do after graduation?"

"I was thinking of pursuing related to arts..." You muttered, which he heard it. He hummed in response as he carefully examines you.

Your (e/c) eyes sparkle as he gets lost by staring at them. The way your (h/l) (h/c) hair bounces every time you walk, how it smells like strawberries every time he gave you one of his warmest hugs that you love. The way it felt soft on his fingers every time you allow him to touch it. Your rosy lips always form the smile he fell in love with, that he always wanted to lean in and feel your lips against his.

Silence engulfed the whole room when two hearts began beating faster at each others' chests as you both realize your faces are close to each other.

Both of your faces felt hot and slowly turned to deep shades of red. Sugawara slowly leaned in, but due to the panic from the closure of your both faces, you quickly back away. Your heart is beating so fast that you could feel it would explode at any moment.

"I-I-I'm so, so sorry! I didn't notice that my face was so close a-and... and..." You began to ramble on and on as Sugawara stared at you.

He sighs, and calms you down, "It's alright, I also apologize since I didn't notice that my face was also close to yours," but he didn't mind it though.

You exhaled the air you held in in relief. You look at the clock on his nightstand and noticed it was getting late, "I guess it was getting late, I should get going."

Your best friend looked at the clock on his nightstand, "Oh right, it is! Your mom might be worried about you if you don't hurry..." You hummed in agreement.

"Well, I'm glad to see you alright after what happened," you gave him a small smile as you open his bedroom door, "B–"

"Y-you'll be coming to my graduation, r-right?" Of all times, why does he have to stutter now? But he can't blame himself, he was nervous.

You look at him and smirk, "Of course, I'll try to go there as fast as I can!" You clicked your tongue at him, following with a giggle. He chuckled and you both bid farewell to each other.

Leaving him alone in his room, he opened his phone to reveal a picture of you and him in a festival, wearing a kimono, you both held a candy apple together. He smiled at the picture and turned off his phone and slowly drifted off to dreamland.

The day of graduation has arrived. The whole auditorium was filled with many students who're ready to take the next step in their lives and parents who are overwhelmed with happiness that their children finally accomplished their high school stage. They sat down, listen to the teachers and representative students giving out their speeches to every graduate inside the auditorium.

After the ceremony and giving out of diplomas, the atmosphere was filled with joy and a sense of accomplishment with a mix of sadness that the students will be separated from one of their friends, but they will all carry those wonderful memories they made the moment they set foot outside the school inside their hearts.

"Smile at the camera!" With a flash of the camera, Sugawara and his 3 fellow friends, Daichi, Asahi, and Kiyoko, from his club took a picture showing their diploma, with proud faces.

"Congratulations on your graduation guys!" Hinata came up to them, followed by the rest of the volleyball club members giving their congratulations.

"Thank you for everything!" They all bowed to their now graduated seniors, who are holding their tears (mainly Sugawara), and wishing them good luck.

While the others are conversing with one another, Sugawara began to scan the crowd if there is any sign of you, but you were nowhere to be seen.

Did you forget about his graduation?

No, that's impossible! You texted him to remind him about his graduation and even told him that you'll catch up. Whatever was holding you back must've been hard for you.

He sighed, but still hoping and praying that you'll at least come.

Minutes has passed, and there is still no sign of you. He couldn't help but feel sad, Asahi and Daichi noticed that their friend is in low spirit.

They slung their arms over their silver-haired friend, following by Asahi's voice, "Hey, don't feel too gloomy on your graduation day."

Daichi agreeing with Asahi and added, "Yeah, how about let's hang out tomorrow to celebrate our brand new page in life?"

"Sure, tha—" he was cut off by his phone starts ringing, he checked the caller id to know who was calling, and to his surprise, it's you! Excitingly, he quickly answered the call.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Koushi! Where are you?" His spirit was filled with happiness the moment he heard your voice. Daichi and Asahi let him go after seeing their friend in high spirits now, they looked at each other when they heard a girl's voice.

'Oh, that's right... That must be his best friend from middle school he was talking about...' They remembered that they first met you in the Spring Inter-high, the day you revealed to him that you were a manager of Seijoh. You three officially met after they won from Shiratorizawa, thus a friendship bloomed between the three of you.

"I can't see you anywhere," You scanned your eyes to see any silver-haired boy holding a phone to his ears, much to your dismay, there's none. "Oh wait! I think I saw one of your club members, that orange-hair kid, Hinata, right?" You exclaimed when you see Hinata from the distance.

You were about to grab his attention when Sugawara stops you, "No, wait! Let me go there!"

"Uh, sure! Yeah!" You were taken back when he stops you. Maybe he was so eager to see you? Or maybe...

He has something to tell you? A confession of love, maybe?

You blushed at that thought of him confessing to you. You snapped back to reality when he spoke,

"Where are you?"

"At the entrance..." He started to dash towards the entrance as quickly as possible, he wanted to be by your side and wrapped you up into a big hug, and pepper you up with kisses because you finally came.

You noticed a certain silver boy dashing up to you at the corner of your eye, "I see you!" You wave your arms up to signal him that you were there, "Did you see me waving my arms at you?"

He saw you waving your arms and stop right in front of you, "Yeah, I sure did," he smiled at you gently, as he hung up the call.

You blush at how beautiful his smile is, and smiled back, "Congratulations on your graduation Koushi," you gave him a bundle of yellow flowers, "You did amazing... I'm so proud of you!"

"Thank you, (N/n)," he grabbed the bundle of flowers as he hugs you.

"Sorry for being late, my mom pestered me to search for a place to stay in Kyoto," you laughed nervously as you scratch your cheek with your index finger lightly.

Wait, what?

"Huh?" Sugawara's face is filled with confusion.

"What?" You raised an eyebrow, "Didn't I tell you that I am going to Kyoto for college?" His shocked expression says it all and all he could let out is,

"Eh?"

"Eh?" You copied but more surprised, "W-wh– I forgot to tell you, didn't I?" He nodded.

"Oops... Well, now you know," you chuckled nervously as thoughts like 'Wow, you are already an idiot, but I didn't expect that your idiocy is in another level' swirled into your head.

"Did your parents persuade you to go to Kyoto?" He couldn't believe his best friend, the person with who he shared many memories, the person he fell for since middle school, is going someplace far away, a place that is out of his reach.

Well, he should've expected this anyway, you two are going to be adults, so there will come a day that one of you will move to somewhere far. He knows you wouldn't be by his side forever physically, he knows that, but he couldn't help it.

"Nope," You said, popping the 'p', "I decided this on my own! Despite my family's protests, I thought maybe studying in Kyoto will be a good idea to pursue my passion for arts. Since, you know, Kyoto has many art galleries and the well-known art studio, Kyoto Animation is there..."

"Oh, I see..." That's right, you wanted to pursue your dreams as an artist. Who was he to stop you from doing that? He would feel guilty and miserable if he stops you from moving to Kyoto, stopping you to pursue your passion. He should look at the bright side and think more of your happiness. He wants you to succeed every step of the way, like how you wanted that for him too.

He ruffled your hair gently and said, "Good luck (N/n), make sure when you become famous, mention me as your number one supporter!" He proudly jokes, which made you smile.

"One more thing, I planned to tell you this before the day I leave for Kyoto arrives," He looks at you. You're staring at his hazel eyes, you feel nervous, you wanted to tell him how you feel, you have to tell him before you go, you need to tell him.

"I want to thank you... For everything..." He was about to speak until you stop him, "Hear me out! I wanted to thank you for everything, for putting a smile on my face, for supporting me along the way, for your kind and understanding nature. Being there for me when I needed someone the most, saying the things I wanted to hear, helping me when I am having conflict about myself. Every single thing you do, I am truly grateful for, and every time I remember the way you smile, laugh, the way your eyes show your utmost sincere care for me, and all those little things I mentioned, it made me so happy... It made my heart flutter so much..." You trailed off.

You clench your hands together and continued speaking, "When I thought about moving to Kyoto, my mind reminded me of you, they reminded me the feeling that I don't want to leave you and that I wanted to stay by your side forever... I wanted to be with you for the rest of my life..." you look up and notice him removing his top second button.

"Open your hands," you did what he said and placed his second button to your palm.

"What is this for?"

"Remember a saying back in middle school that if a guy gave his second button to a girl, that means he is confessing his love for her?" You nodded, as your eyes grew big from realization, your heart starts racing from happiness, "I love you, (Y/n) (L/n), ever since middle school, and I, too, wanted to thank you for everything you've done for me," he placed his forehead against yours, as he closes his eyes.

You did the same and smiled, "Me too, Sugawara Koushi... I love you too..." You held the button he gave to you close to your heart.

You pulled away and cups his cheeks, "Koushi, are you willing to wait for me until I finish college?"

He held your hand on his cheek and gave you the smile you always adore, "Of course." Your eyes gleam in delight as you both giggled in sheer happiness.

In the end, whether you two are best friends or together as a couple, whether the distance is far away from each other or not, as long as you two are there for each other, supporting each other along the way even through the hardest times, your bond with one another is inseparable.

✧◝(⁰▿⁰)◜✧

#haikyuu!!#haikyuu x reader #sugawara x reader #sugawara kōshi #haikyuu sugawara #sugawara x y/n #sugawara x you #sugawara koushi #sugawara fluff #sugawara angst #sugawara fanfiction #haikyu x reader #hq!! x reader #sugawara koshi x you #sugawara koushi x you #sugawara koushi x reader

113 notes · View notes

issaxcharlie · 3 years

Text

Always You

Pairing: Charlie Gillespie x Fem Reader

Summary: {We Play Pretend Series} Charlie decides to stop overthinking and finally proposes to his best friend at his very own way.

Songs Used: Black and White by Niall Horan and I’ll Follow You by Echosmith

Word Count: +2k

Charlie finally finishes preparing the fire as Y/N comes out of the tent in his orange hoodie, one of his bandanas adorning her high ponytail. Her dazzling smile blanks him for a few seconds, and the day he asked her to be his girlfriend for the first time appeared on the back of his head.

He was maybe even more nervous than he is right now, and he blurted out the question without realizing it. It wasn't until Y/N jumped into his arms and pressed her lips against his that he finally understood what was happening. That day was the happiest day of his life, but then it was overcome by the day their paths crossed again, then by the day they became a couple again, then by the day they moved in together, and if everything goes well, now it will be overcome by this one. He smiles fondly at the memories. One thing is for sure, with Y/N everything always gets better.

She sits next to him, reaching out to sink her face into her boyfriend's neck. When he suggested for them to take a little camping trip before they returned to Canada for the holidays, she said yes without hesitation. First of all, because she loves to experience moments like this with him. Memories of all the times they camped in the Gillespie's backyard when they were children lighting up her heart. And secondly, because she knows that he needs the peace and calm that being here gives him, after all, she has no doubt that Charlie has planned to propose to her during the trip back home.

“Did you enjoy the day? I know you wanted to rest before the trip, it means a lot to me that you agreed to come.” He confessed while wrapping his arm around her, lifting the hoodie slightly to caress the sensitive skin on her waist.

“Char, we spent hours blasting our favorite albums, we elegantly ate ridiculously delicious gas station hotdogs, you spilled the soda down your pants which was quite entertaining, and now I'm under the stars by your side on a beautiful night. If you ask me, this is the perfect day.” She declares without hesitation, raising her head a little to give him a soft kiss in his jawline.

Charlie blushes, happiness flooding his soul just as always with his precious girl. “I couldn’t agree more. Everyday I get to spend with you is a perfect one.” She smirks at his words, her raised eyebrow indicates she's ready to fight him.

"Oh yeah? Even the time I convinced you that Santa was obviously born in Canada and we searched for his house all over the city?" He snorts thinking about two really small ten year olds doing mischief around the town.

"You had very convincing arguments. Shame our parents didn’t think the same and punished us for a month."

“It’s not really punishment if we get to spend it together anyways.” Y/N added, remembering all the hours of fun they managed to have in the Gillespie’s leaving room.

"They had no other choice, we were attached by the hips. I mean, we tried to elope and live in the park a year earlier just because we were sick of saying goodbye every night.” Charlie reminds her while breaking into laughter.

“Mom had to convince us to come back, telling us that one day we could get married and be together in a way nicer place than the park. And you didn’t believe her because what could be nicer than the park?” Y/N recalls, the image of their 9 year old selves swinging with their backpacks full of important prized possessions like Charlie's collection of rocks or Y/N’s toy microphone making them laugh.

“She had to explain to me everything about that marriage thing she was talking about on the way home.” Charlie says with a smile.

“And then you propose a few days later in your backyard, with a red ring pop and a beautiful original song you played on your guitar.” She hugs him tightly, giving him a sweet kiss on the cheek.

“I was nine, I'm sure it wasn’t beautiful. It probably didn't even make sense. But, I wrote it with a lot of love, just for you to eat the ring five minutes later.” He calls her out, sticking out his tongue in a playful way.

“And I’ll do it again.” He pretends to be offended but Y/N just needs to kiss him and whisper that she loves him against his lips for him to smile again. “We were quite intense children, huh?”

His eyes light up, and he winks cheekily. “We still are.”

Charlie gently kisses her hair and gets up to take his guitar, meanwhile she sits a little further away from him to give him enough room to play, and he tries to control the shaking of his hand while playing a soft sound he has been working on.

Once he finally calmed down a little, he starts to play the song he drove so far away to play, deciding it’s time. “That first night we were standing at your door, fumbling for your keys, then I kissed you. Ask me if I want to come inside, 'cause we didn't want to end the night. Then you took my hand, and I followed you.” Y/N had never heard that song before, which immediately surprises her because they live together, how come she never heard it? She puts attention to the lyrics and realizes he is talking about the night they became a couple again, after the Stand Tall presentation.

“Yeah, I see us in black and white, crystal clear on a star lit night, In all your gorgeous colors, I promise that I'll love you for the rest of my life. See you standing in your dress, swear in front of all our friends there'll never be another. I promise that I'll love you for the rest of my life.” Then everything clicks. How nervous he has been all day, his "sudden" desire to camp before the holidays, the eyes full of emotion with which he has looked at her all night. And suddenly this day is even more perfect than she ever believed it could be.

“Now, we're sitting here in your living room, telling stories while we share a drink or two. And there's a vision I've been holding in my mind, we're 65 and you ask when did I first know?" Tears begin to fall down her cheeks, the purest smile she has ever had stuck on her face. “I always knew.” They whisper at the same time in a broken voice, Charlie trying very hard not to cry at their matched answer so he can finish the song.

“I want the world to witness, when we finally say I do. It's the way you love, I gotta give it back to you. I see us in black and white, crystal clear on a star lit night, In all your gorgeous colors. I promise that I'll love you for the rest of my life.”

He finishes the song, puts down the guitar while taking a deep breath and kneels carefully in front of her. “It has always been you. It was you when we were 8 years old and only you could borrow my best crayons, It was you when we were 16 and I learned to drive because you had no one to take you to your auditions, and It was you when we were 22 and I asked you to move in with me because I couldn’t stand be apart from you again. You are the only one with whom I feel as ecstatic as when I jump into the sea, and all you have to do is look at me to achieve it. You are light, Y/N. This beautiful bright star that for some reason, always chooses me. I love you so much, beautiful. You are the love of my life, It will always be you.”

She can't stop the tears falling down her face, her hand lovingly caressing the cheek of the man in front of her. "Y/N Y/L, will you marry me?" She doesn’t give him time to react and joins their lips hard, trying desperately to make him feel everything she is feeling in those moments. He responds fervently, taking her with one hand firmly by the thigh while with the other caresses her neck, confidently putting his hand inside the hoodie.

She bites his pouty lower lip to smoothly slide her tongue, and he strokes her breasts gently before removing his hand from the collar of her clothing. When they finally separate to breathe, Y/N's eyes move to what Charlie is holding in front of her, a precious ring dangling from a golden chain that she has apparently been wearing as a necklace for who knows how many hours.

“Yes, yes, yes. I would always choose you Char.” Y/N gets up and helps Charlie to his feet, only to pull him close and bring his body against hers, her hands entwining in his hair while his arms wrap around her hips. His face shining with happiness. “The necklace was a smart move. Since when have I been wearing it?” She asks while staring deeply at his dazzling green eyes.

“You are unable to keep a ring on your finger for more than three days, there was no other option. I put it on after you fell asleep on the road.”

"This is the first time you managed to fool me. I totally thought you were going to propose in Canada."

“I know it wasn't glamorous but-”

“Shh, it was perfect. The song is beautiful, the ring looks just as I always dreamed of and you are all I want and more. I have never been happier. Heck, you could have asked me this morning while we were in our pajamas watching cartoons and I would have cried with joy anyway. Char, you're everything I need.” He kisses her deeply, releasing all the emotions that had had him stressed throughout the day, enjoying the company of his future wife and the way that only she knows how to melt him.

He lets go briefly to search something in his phone, and the melody he just played starts to fill the comfortable silence.

“It’s my favorite song already.” She whispers against his lips, a small smile in the corner of her mouth.

“It’s all yours, just like me.” Both laugh at how cheesy it sounded, dancing in each other's arms under the stars. Silently thanking God for having found their soulmate in this life.

Although he swears he has enough energy to dance the night away, after an hour Y/N notices just how tired Charlie actually is, and drags him to the tent to get some rest.

“Baby, I’m okay. I want to celebrate all night with you.” He whispers in her ear, catching her by the waist the moment she leans his head against the pillow to prevent her from getting up.

“Easy there, tiger. You can't even keep your eyes open. You drove nonstop for hours without complaining once just because you know I don't like driving. You did the hardest work with the tent and the fire, plus all the time we spent hiking. You need to rest.” His grasp on her loosens and she moves quickly to his side. He turns over his shoulder and leans on her chest, wrapping his arm around her waist.

She smiles at the sight and starts to softly play with his curls while singing him to sleep. “I fell in love at first sight, green eyes that fix it all. Your heart, it feels it all.” All the times she seeked the comfort in his beautiful eyes during the years replaying in her head. The way they shined with love and confusion that first day at the jatp bootcamp replaying in her mind.

“And I, I can't believe that you're mine.” She lets go of his hair to admire the ring around her neck with more attention, but his hand instantly reaches for hers and puts it back on his hair, making her chuckle. “You take away every breath. I can't believe I'm still speechless.” She whispers, planting small kisses on his hair, inhaling the scent of his shampoo as she wraps him in her arms.

“Charles Gillespie, It will always be you.”

Thanks for reading ✨

Taglist: @writerinlearning @strangerthanfanfiction713, @thebloodthirstyvampress @kinda-really-lost, @kcd15 @magnet-girl @aliandthephantoms, @stxrkspidey, @pinkrockstar19, @s0uz4s, @shycupcakealissa @cookiebuba, @fangirlangioma, @sageellsworth05 @twist3dtinkerbell @sunsetcurvenotsunsetswerve @caitsymichelle13, @ifilwtmfc, @bibliophilewednesday, @totomoshi, @siennanoelle01 @lunashadow6955 @bookfrog247, @morganayennefertyrell, @kiss-themoongoodbye, @rachelle3musicals, @imsydneywalker @really-dont-forget-it @agentstarkid @talksoprettyjjx @kaitieskidmore1 @lukeys-giggle @katie-navarro @crybabyddl @cocopuffs0211 @marvel-ousnesss @blackhood5sos @dpaccione @tuttigunner @calamitykaty @owensgoathat @magicalxdaydream @sunsetcurvej @ss-tipton @rangerelik @badwolf00593 @fobobozobo @justalittleweirdoo

#charlie gillespie x reader #charlie gillespie x y/n #charlie gillespie fic #charlie gillespie imagine #charlie gillespie fanfic #charlie gillespie imagines #luke jatp #luke patterson imagine #luke patterson x reader #luke patterson x y/n #luke patterson fic

338 notes · View notes

queenoftheworldisdead · 3 years

Text

Cupid

Note: This is for @afriendlyblackhottie Brat and Birthday challenge. Happy Bday Month 🎉🎈🎊🎂🍰! I chose Cupid by 112. Chris art work by @nix-akimbo she is amazing here is the original.

Summery: Ransom likes a bridesmaid.

Warning: Daddy Kink, gag, oral (reader receives), sex

Groomsman Band member Ransom x Black Reader, Knives out Alternative Universe

Leaning in the archway of the reception hall you sighed watching the newlyweds dance their first dance. You didn't want to be here. Not after all the shit he put Courtney, the bride, through.

But your bestie was the kind of girl that could not function without a man in her life. He had cheated on her five times, that you knew of. You were sure there was more, but she as well as you were tired of the berating.

It was always the same. He cheated, she cried, you picked up the pieces and then when he was ready she would go back. Pathetic.

"Aw don't pout princess your day will come" your eyes rolled at the sound of his voice. You had the misfortune to be linked with Ransom, the cousin of the groom. All the other bridesmaids drooled over him, but you weren't impressed. This rich boy was looking to add to his body count so you only interacted with him only when you needed to.

Their family had paid for this whole affair. You nearly punched one of the grooms relatives when she made a remark on Courtney's color choices. They were all on your shit list.

Just ignore him. Its almost over and you will never have to see him again.

As the song ended everyone applauded while you made your way over to the open bar. Your wrist was snagged as you crossed his path. Snatching it back you looked at him as if he grew another head.

"Look you don't want to be here I don't want to be here. Let's be miserable together." He held up his hands in surrender. You were stuck on this island and you were smart enough not to fall for dumb shit so you gave yourself permission to relax.

You both took over an empty table in the back of the massive hall. Ransom disappeared for a bit, then returned with two bottles of champagne and two glasses. The bar was an open bar, but you were sure they weren't handing out bottles left and right.

"OK let's play a game to pass the time." Ransom proposed as he approached.

"Game? What kind of game?" You waited curiously. Sitting the glasses and bottles down Ransom proceeded to pop the cork on one of the bottles of Champaign.

"We both take turns pointing out people we think the other would fuck."your mouth fell open with his boldness as he spoke. "If you guess wrong you have to take a sip. Yatta yatta you get it."

"Are you just trying to get me drunk?" You squint at him playfully suspicious.

"Nah, just bored. So come on let's play."

You watched as he poured the glasses to the brim, when he handed you the bubbling glass you thanked him. Ransom moved his chair next to you, sitting shoulder to shoulder so you both were sure to have the same view of the people on the floor.

"Ladies first" he held his glass high. You clinked your glass with his signaling ‘good game’.

"What about her?" You pointed to Courtney's great aunt. The lovely woman was at least eighty-seven, you knew this would be a 'no', but why not start off with a softball.

He gave you a look that made you snort.

"Wow was that a laugh? I seriously didn't think the ice queen was capable. You didn't even smile for the wedding photos. Achievement unlocked." Ransom was full of himself.

"No one is gonna believe I got the frost queen to crack a smile." Ransom boasted.

You took a sip from your glass so you didn't have to reply. There was nothing to smile about. You didn't approve of this wedding so you weren't going to act like you were. Courtney was lucky you even agreed to be a bridesmaid.

"OK my turn." He observed the crowded floor, before finding his mark. "Glasses two o'clock."

You searched out 'Glasses' and scoped him out. Tall, put together nicely. "Yep."

"Really?" He gave you a look, that made it hard to fight back the curl of your lip.

"Yep..I have particular taste." You say casually with a shrug.

"Well all right to each his own I guess."

"My turn" you stopped for a beat then found her. " Oh what about her?" you pointed to a tall slender blonde.

"Ugh no...That's my aunt."

"Oooops....My bad... let me see who else, umm" you looked around the room, but he only looked at you.

"Oh! Oh! Her" you pointed to Stephani, a younger cousin of Courtney's. Thick thighed, uber fit college student.

"You can't go twice. Take your sip."

"What that was your aunt that cant count" you argued back.

"A no is a no" he tutted.

"Fine" you gulped from your glass and waited your turn.

"OK my turn. Hmm...What about him" he pointed to an older man that was chatting up a bridesmaid that was way to young for him.

"Eww nah not my type, but he might have gotten a yes back in the day." You tilted your head with a smirk.

"Oh thank gawd. That's my dad."

"What the fuck? Dude gross" you slapped at his shoulder and laughed. Ransom rubbed it fanning pain.

"Hey you picked my aunt" he chuckled with you.

"Yeah but I didn't know she was your aunt!"

After finishing the first bottle you started to feel loose. Ransom's arm stretched out along the back of your chair, slyly rubbing circles on your bare arm, while you leaned snuggled into his side as you both continue to people watch.

"So what do you do?" You asked him.

Ransom was silent for a moment. Taking a long swig from the glass before looking over at you and sighing.

"I'm in a band."

"Oh really, is that your little hobby you do before you take over the board seat at your grand-papa's company?" you bit back a laugh. Ransom frowned at you, but you didn't care.

You knew of the older Thrombey, the famous author and owner of a publishing house. Through rehearsal you watched the interactions between the two and you knew that Ransom was the favorite of the acclaimed writer's brood.

"I don't want anything to do with that company believe it or not. I love music always have."

"Must be nice to play in a band bankrolled by a publishing house. What are y'all called 'Blood and Rock'" you laughed at the ridiculousness of it.

"Ha wrong again. We're called 'Coffee and Roses'. And I've been cut of financially ever since I got these bad boys" Ransom shimmed out of his blazer and rolled up his sleeves. His well toned arms were completely covered in ink. When he pulled down his collar you were able to see the massive art work that encompassed his neck, you bit into your bottom lip as he allowed you to ogle him. "This art work was not board approved " he joked. The booze mixed with Ransom's rocker bod was starting to lower your inhibitions and you needed to put a stop to it.

"Your cousin is a piece of shit." You changed the subject before taking a pull from your glass.

"Yeah well he gets that from his dad, he's always been an asshole."

"Apples don't fall far do they?" You snipped. When Ransom didn't respond you looked over, he was looking at his father who had now moved on to another pretty young thing.

"He made a mistake and he is fixing it." Ransom replied, suddenly in defense of his cousin.

The mistake in question was a child, by another woman. That baby you thought would be the final straw to break the camels back.

"Diamonds don't fix problems." You didn't come from money, but you knew that this wedding was a band-aid. And once it got wet you wondered what would be the gift for the next 'mistake'.

The groom had always bought his way out of his binds. The more he fucked up the more money he poured on it. This wedding you couldn't even fathom the cost. The wedding ring alone looked like it could choke a horse. And this destination wedding on his dime made you think on what happened in the interim leading up to this event.

"You're a really good friend. She's lucky that she has someone that cares so much." You both stared into the distance at the couple. They danced and smiled at each other so happy, but you felt sick. Ransom's sweet words made you immediately suspicious of his intent, his cousin had a habit of talking sweet, but he was a fucking snake. You weren't going to end up like Courtney.

"Look don't think that just because we got all chummy that all of a sudden I am gonna want to bang one out." You hit your glass on the table harder than you meant to, it tipped over and spilled out the rest of your drink.

When a little bit of the liquid trickled off the table and hit your dress you pushed away from the table. Just a tiny bit, nothing major to fuss about, but you had hit your limit. You'd done the wedding, you took the pictures and you stuck around for the reception. It was time to go.

You weren't about to be some random rich kids one night stand. So you stormed off. Thankfully the ball room was not far from the adjoining hotel. Marching you fumed and you cursed your friend for being this dumb, yourself for not doing more to stop this and almost falling for Ransom's charm. Mashing the buttons you thought of changing your number, wiping your hands from this friendship and looking into an overnight flight back home.

How much worse would it be now that she was legally married to that douche bag. The thought of them having kids only served to further irked you.

Before the elevator door could close a hand sliced down the middle, halting the closure.

You stood stunned as Ransom appeared out of breath and in-between the open doors.

**"Baby, I'm so tired of the way you turn my words into deception and lies"**

Ransom consumed the space between you two. Your ass hit the hand rail as the doors closed.

"I am not my father, I am not my cousin. I liked you." His confession made your heart flutter.

Don't be stupid. He is the same as the rest of his family. Don't fall for his game.

His hands rested on the bar on either side of your hips as he stood toe to toe with you. You rolled your eyes and scoffed turning away from him, unable to keep staring into those eyes.

**Don't misunderstand me when I try to speak my mind I'm only saying what's in my heart**

With one finger he brought your focus back to him. You frowned at him, you weren't weak. You weren't falling for him no matter how much your body wanted to throw in the towel.

**Cupid doesn't lie** He leaned in close and you held your breath as your heart raced.

**But you won't know unless you give it a try** Ransom whispered over your lips before kissing you gently. You broke down allowing him to invade your mouth. His lips felt soft and his firm arms a welcome feeling as they wrapped around you.

The elevator dinged loudly and you pulled back. Your lipstick smeared on his mouth made for a funny sight. Looking at the number it was your floor then back at him.

**Give it a try** Ransom pleaded.

A switch flipped inside you. Angry at yourself you pushed past him and marched to your hotel room.

He is just a spoiled rich kid trying to have fun. Don't fall for it. You try and convince yourself.

He shouted as the doors closed and you tried to ignore him.

**Cupid doesn't lie**

He shouted again. You halted, but refused to look.

"All men lie" You stopped as you replied back at him. There wasn't a woman in your life that wasn't hurt and you didn't want to join that club. You wanted to protect yourself at all cost. You heard the elevator doors close so you let out a sigh of relief.

What if you were wrong. What if he was right? A nagging thought bubbled in your mind. He was fun, you felt at easy around him. Some part of you yearned for him to come back.

You were so lost in your own head that you hadn't heard him rush up behind you. Ransom quickly spun you around, his eyes boring into your soul. The sight of which made it hard to stay angry.

**"Oh baby, true love won't lie...But we won't know unless we give it a try"**

He kissed you again. This time more hungry than before, so much so it took your breath away as he pulled back.

**"Give it a try"** he pleaded yet again.

It was hard to get the door open with Ransom latched onto your face. Fumbling with the key you tried blindly several times to get the card in the slot with your back pressed hard against the door.

Frustrated Ransom snatched the card and opened the door for you.

"Thanks Daddy" you teased, looking up through your lashes at him.

"Daddy huh?" The grin that grew on his face was devilish indeed. "So that's it...You act all bratty to get Daddy to react. Huh?"

Scooping you off your feet he carried you across the threshold. You were so surprised that he was able to handle your weight with ease, as he walked you over to the bed, before tossing you.

"Keep the dress on and pull your tits out" he command as he furiously unbuttoned his shirt.

You marveled at the fit rocker. He revealed more tats as he opened his shirt. Pushing down your off the shoulder strap you yanked your top down. Your half bra going down with it, allowing your breast to bounce free.

"Stand up."

Without a word you rose to your feet.

"Turn around."

Again you followed his orders. The way he commanded you made your need soak through your panties.

"Gonna come deep in that pretty pussy, show you who you belong to" Ransom taunted into the shell of your ear. "Say ahh."

The neck tie that had long since come undone was now being wrapped around your open mouth, wrapping it quickly then knotting the fabric.

Once secure Ransom proceeded to massage your breast from behind. As he tweaked your nipples you felt his cock, hard and stiff pressed into your ass.

You pushed and rubbed against it toying with him, the hum that buzzed from his lips almost sounded primal. "Nothing but a big tease huh? Daddy's going to show you what he thinks about teases."

Pushing you over on the bed you yelped through your gag. Looking over your shoulder you watched as Ransom bunched up the fabric of your dress, tossing it over your hips to expose your ass.

Feeling cocky you twerked your ass before him, the look in his eye showed that he approved of the sight. Ransom palmed your cheeks with both his hands, kneading the soft tissue as he rubbed his erection on you.

One hand moved around your hips and on the outer-lining of your panties.

"Fuck baby girl is that all for me?" Ransom's finger pulled at the elastic that touched your bud. He felt the drenched panties and pulled them back until they snapped back in place.

"Fuck baby girl" he purred.

Ransom lowered himself onto his hunches, pulling your panties down with them. You felt his tongue lapping gently at your folds. The sensation sending shivers throughout your body.

His tongue separated your lips, you knees wanted to cave at the tantalizing feel of him. Through your gag you moaned, the slow torture of his feasting was bringing you close to the finish line.

Ransom sucked hard on your bare mound adding a finger as he rose to his feet. "You taste so sweet baby." He praised as he curled his fingers inside of you.

"Do you want to come on my cock or my fingers?" He asked as your cunt tensed around his digits. Ransom knew you were getting close and you hoped he would choose the former.

"I cant hear you" he added another digit as you begged through your gag. You wanted to feel him all of him, but there was no way to make your answer clear through the fabric.

"Well, if you are not going to answer I will pick for you."

Ransom knew what you wanted, even with your desperate mumbling. Kicking your legs father apart he then removed his fingers. You whimpered at the lack of touch, but you were also thrilled to finally get what you really wanted.

The sound of his zipper going down made you antsy. You danced on the heels of your feet with anticipation of his next move.

Ransom took his cock in one hand while he spread one of your cheeks with the other. He rubbed his cock against the deep pink within your folds.

Toying with you as you mumbled through the tie. His pre-cum mixed with your juices as he pressed his tip hard against your opening.

"Are you gonna be a good girl from me?" He teased. You furiously nodded 'yes'.

You felt the pressure of him entering you as drool seeped past your gag. "Do you belong to me?" He halted, the sudden stop drove you crazy. Again you nod and shouted 'yes' through your restraint.

"Good girl."

Ransom filled you to your core, only stopping when you sheathed him completely. You gripped the fabric of the hotel duvet, you hadn't expected him to be so big.

The slapping of flesh on flesh filled the room. His moans mixed with the sounds of your sloppy sex were enough to send you over the edge.

Ransom controlled the pace, his length undeterred by your lack of space to take him in. You cried through your gag as he sent jolts through your body. "You were made for me" he proclaimed as he snapped his hips into you.

Your mewls were muffled by the tie, but you were sure whoever was in the room next to you could still make out what was happening here.

"Fuck" he growled as he fucked you into the bed. "I'm gonna fill you up."

"Gonna make you nice and round" he slapped your ass as he thrusted. You felt your core tighten.

"Fuck Daddy I want to come on your cock!" You finally shouted as the gag finally slipped from your lips.

"Come in me Daddy!" You felt him twitch inside you at your desperate pleading.

"Oh baby girl your tempting me."

"Please!" You panted.

"Fuck" Ransom shouted as he shot his load inside you. You felt him coat you as you milked him dry.

Ransom fell on-top of you and your knees buckled, causing you both to fall forward onto the bed. Ransom moved off you, sweaty and exhausted. "Don't think that I'm done with you yet."

#Ransom x black reader #Ransom x Black!reader #Ransom x reader

171 notes · View notes

egcdeath · 3 years

Text

checkmate

summary: you’ve always refused to lose, and love was no exception. (gone girl-ish au)

pairing(s): ransom drysdale x dark!reader, a special mystery guest ;)

word count: 3.7k

warnings: 18+ because of heavy themes! faked death, framing of crimes, manipulation, alluding to sex, alluding to cheating, terrible relationship dynamic, very loose usage of the word crazy/psychotic, implied mention of self harm, brief choking & slapping (in a non sexual way lol), pregnancy trapping (idk if thats the right term), the reader is a very bad human being, overuse of italics *please let me know if i’m missing any warnings!

author’s note: this is my 2nd submission for @stargazingfangirl18’s 5k soft dark challenge, i decided to make the reader dark >:) but ransom is also not a good person. I used these prompts: “I’ve waited a long time for this, sweetheart.” & The town golden *girl isn’t as sweet as everyone thinks.

this is definitely the most unhinged thing i’ve ever written, but blame @literate-lamb for making me write this because when i pitched this to her and said that i’d probably never write it, she enabled me.

okay that's enough from me. join my taglist if you want :D

“I know women whose entire personas are woven from a benign mediocrity. Their lives are a list of shortcomings: the unappreciative boyfriend, the extra ten pounds, the dismissive boss, the conniving sister, the straying husband. I've always hovered above their stories, nodding in sympathy and thinking how foolish they are, these women, to let these things happen, how undisciplined. And now to be one of them! One of the women with the endless stories that make people nod sympathetically and think: Poor dumb bitch.” Gillian Flynn, Gone Girl

Your whole life, you’d considered yourself a competitive person. Constantly overcompensating for one thing or another, whether it was the chronic desire to achieve perfection that had been installed in you since you were a little girl, or your persistent internalized sense of inadequacy. You realized early on that it was much better for you to win than for you to lose, no matter the physical, emotional, or mental cost of the prize of perfection.

For the most part, this mindset worked out for you. You graduated as Valedictorian from your high school, neared the top of your graduating class at Harvard. God knew you earned it, all those tears you shed into overpriced textbooks, all the popping of unprescribed Adderall, and robbing yourself of the parties and social events that the rest of your peers gladly indulged in.

You were just different, which was why you gained a job nearly immediately after your exit from school, quickly climbing to the top at the Blood Like Wine publishing company after only a few years of being there.

And one night, at the party celebrating the release of A Thousand Knives when you laid your eyes on Hugh Ransom Drysdale, the grandson of your boss, you knew that you needed to have him. Rich, hot, a bit of an asshole. You deserved to finally complete your image, and that socialite flavored eye candy seemed to fit the part perfectly. Luckily for you, he was desperate. It only took a few tugs on your dress’ V-line, and a number of knowing smirks to find yourself being finger-banged in his family manor’s bathroom.

From there, you wormed your way into his life. Leaving belongings at his place as an excuse to come back, and offering booty calls in the middle of the night. Ransom must’ve been much more desperate than you originally thought, as it really only seemed to take one night of stroking his hair while he vented about his family to make him want to be with you. Men with mommy issues were always so easy.

Except, he wasn’t that easy. The longer you got to know Ransom, the more fucked up you realized he really was. He had no boundaries at all, became jealous and enraged at the drop of a pin, and occasionally told you things that made the hairs on your arms rise.

This of course all came to a head after the night of Harlan’s 85th birthday party. When the news broke of his tragic death, you’d immediately known it was the works of your Hugh. If your intuition wasn’t enough, his confession in the shower, where he’d demanded you take off your clothes to display that you were without a bug, certainly was.

You were completely devastated. The man that you’d invested so much into for years had thrown both his and your reputations down the drain in just a matter of hours. Of course, you felt bad for Harlan too. He was a good guy (when he wasn’t instigating a family fight).

Still, you showed up during the funeral in your best mourning clothes and dawning your biggest crocodile tears. You rubbed Linda’s back while she mourned the loss of her father, and the new truth about her husband. You played dumb when interrogated by some Southern private investigator, even giving Ransom an airtight alibi. You testified on his behalf in court with enough conviction to grant you an Emmy.

You’d gotten so far, devoted so much energy into him, that you simply refused to lose now.

To your friends, you’d seemed to lead a near perfect life. Dream job, dreamy boyfriend, dream bank account, but it wasn’t enough. You wanted more, you just didn’t know what.

It dawned on you while sipping mimosas at the country club, Ransom playing tennis with his friends just a few yards away from you while Danielle showed off her brand new engagement ring, a .59 Carat Asscher Diamond, that if you heard her speak of again, would probably make you lose your shit.

You zoned out as she droned on and on about the shape, and how Matt proposed to her in their own private room in one of the most exclusive Parisian restaurants, instead focusing on how you could find yourself in the same position as that airhead next to you. In all honesty, you couldn’t stand the idea that someone was doing better than you, let alone someone in your own social circle. Dani got all the bragging rights of being engaged to the heir of some tech giant, being the first in your friend group to get eloped, and worst of all, Matt wasn’t even making her sign a prenup.

You blankly watched Ransom from afar, taking occasional sips from your sweet drink, while you thought of how you deserved all of that and more, and you were going to get it one way or another.

——

It didn’t take much to come up with something, your first and most obvious plan being to simply ask Ransom when he was going to propose to you. Of course, this wasn’t the first time you’d tried to approach him about this subject, you just wondered if maybe this time things would be different.

Panting heavily after a rather rough night in bed, you rolled off of your boyfriend’s chest and gave him a messy, yet sincere kiss. You knew your man well, and if there was any time to pop the question, it was in his post-nut haze.

“Baby,” you said breathily, “I wanna ask you something.”

“Shoot,” he responded casually, glancing over at you.

“When’re you gonna propose to me?” you hummed.

Ransom groaned and shook his head, rolling his eyes, “this is about Matt and Dani, huh?” he tutted, then extended a hand out to your warm cheeks so he could gently caress one with his thumb. “Thought we agreed marriage is just a piece of paper and it’s stupid.”

You huffed in response.

Of fucking course.

“I never said that,” you muttered, setting a hand on his broad chest. “Besides, it’ll be good if you get pissed and decide to like, kill your dad or something. Y’know, spouses don’t have to testify against each other in court.”

Ransom chuckled as if this whole thing was funny, like your feelings were some kind of sick joke to him. “You know my lawyers, babe. They could prove that bees don’t make honey. That bears don’t shit in the forest. I appreciate your attempt, though. This has been some really nice pillow talk.”

“Whatever,” you muttered, pinching his nipple in retaliation before turning your back to him and yanking the blanket onto your side.

You weren’t sure why you were so surprised that he was being stubborn, most of the time you felt like you were pulling teeth from the man. But that’s why you had a backup plan! You always had a backup plan. That’s what separated you from your boyfriend. Where Ransom was extemporized and impulsive, you were calculating and prudent.

Although you devised your plan that very afternoon while watching your partner backhand small green balls, you were going to need some time to get everything in order, to prove Murphy and his stupid law wrong in making sure that everything that could go wrong wouldn’t.

After all, love was a game. And you sure as hell weren’t losing to Hugh Drysdale.

——

You sacrificed too much to have your plans ruined by some trust fund baby with impulsivity issues. You deserved your dream marriage, the stability you wished you had as a child. You wanted the white picket fence, and everything that came along with it. Your desire to be the best, to be perfect was what drove you to poke holes in every condom in the box, what led you to draw liters of your own blood in hopes of staging a fake crime scene, to buy a cheap getaway car and burner phone off of Craigslist, and reach out to a high school boyfriend who you knew was in a position as desperate as you.

You planted seeds of doubt in your friends throughout the following weeks, feeding them lies about Ransom’s behavior, how you were afraid of telling him that you did in fact see two faint red lines on that damn plastic stick– only half of the statement truly being false–, telling them that he was behaving erratically lately.

It all was going without a hitch. Ransom didn’t seem to notice anything was off, despite your frequent visits to the bathroom and newfound affinity for true crime documentaries.

You almost felt guilty, knowing the world of pain you were about to throw the man into. Granted, he deserved the pain. You were in a relationship with a genuinely terrible person, and that person had made a conscious effort not to commit to you. You tried to make this easy for him, give him a chance to say a few words to you and slide a ring on your finger, but no, he always seemed to take the hard route.

You slept like a baby the night before you were setting your plan in action. You made sure to uphold the facade of everything being fine, making Ransom a nice breakfast before sending him halfway across town to the hardware store with an oddly incriminating list.

Once he was out of the house, you hurried off to the fridge in the garage where you’d been keeping a small stash of your own blood. It wasn’t pretty, but it had to be done. You poured the blood throughout the kitchen, splattering bits of it on the counters and cupboards. You poorly cleaned the mess, just as he would.

You put your next move in motion, falsifying a home invasion. You tossed over a table and some chairs, throwing books and photos onto the floor, but left some aspects slightly untouched, like an upright picture frame to give yet another hint that things were not exactly what they appeared.

You left a tiny blue post-it note on the nightstand of Ransom’s side of the bed, a quick and simple doodle of a ring along with the first initial of your name inked onto the tiny piece of paper.

With that, you were off. Technically missing, soon-to-be presumed dead.

----

The days following your disappearance had gone even better than you’d initially planned. Local news coverage had been all over you, search and rescue groups were assiduously looking for you, your parents had opened a tip line, and begged for you to get home safe on news segments. But the best part of it all was that Ransom had been briefly found himself in police custody, only to be released shortly thereafter. His past of an accused murder quickly made your disappearance even more of a national story, and you watched the whole thing unravel from the safety and comfort of your high school boyfriend, Andy Barber’s Newton home.

Of course, you fed him the same lies you’d given to your friends, and seeing the rather lonely position he was in, he gladly let you stay with him. You were absolutely having a hay-day with it all, dedicating hours of your day to watching Ransom slowly unravel. Maybe it was a bit sadistic of you to enjoy torturing your partner so much, but he needed to learn his lesson. You deserved better. You needed Ransom to rise up to your level, allowing you to finally complete your image. To let you two appear to be the perfect couple. Really, this was all on him.

Andy, for the most part, had been a good host. He was gone for the majority of the day, dedicating himself to his work while you lounged around on his dangerously cozy couch. Around two weeks into your stay, you were sharing a box of pizza in the living room with your old lover when something interesting on the television caught your eye.

Ransom, broadcasted on CBS, being interviewed on your disappearance.

You watched with wide eyes as Ransom begged for your return on national television. It was one thing seeing your mother plead for you to come back, the same woman who had installed such toxic behavior in you sob for your return, but Ransom. You’d never loved him more than in that moment.

“Hugh, if you could tell Y/N one thing, what would it be?” the interviewer asked.

Ransom turned, looking straight at the camera, directly into your soul, “Y/N, I love you so much. More than you’ll ever know. I need you to come back safely, to see you, to hold you again. I’d give anything in the world for that right now,” he looked down, a tear falling down his cheek. “I can’t live without you in my life, I-”

His sentence was cut off by Andy grabbing the remote, and turning off the TV. You turned your head and frowned deeply at him.

“Why’d you do that?” you asked with a bit of a pout.

“I just couldn’t stand listening to him talk about you like he hasn’t treated you like shit for the past few years. C’mon, let’s get ready for bed.”

Your blood boiled. Andy was once a means to an end, but now he was interfering. He was clearly much too selfish to see that you and Ransom were quite obviously soulmates. A match made in hell.

You followed him to bed regardless, curling up on what had been your side of the bed for the past few days, and staring at the wall until Andy’s breaths moved from a soft and rhythmic pattern to loud snores. God, those snores were obnoxious.

You slipped out of bed and to his dresser, grabbing two soft ties from the drawer, and daintily tying his wrists to each side of the bedpost.

“What‘re you doing?” he mumbled, instinctively yanking both of his wrists as he awoke.

“I’m going back home,” you whispered.

“You can’t be serious,” Andy huffed, tugging on the restraint attached to the headboard.

You shook your head, “I am.”

“I should’ve known. Why would you do something like this? Do you know how much trouble you’ll be in with the law?”

“Do you know how much trouble you’ll be in when the world finds out that you kidnapped me?” you retorted.

This threat seemed to wake him up right away, “what about this was kidnapping? I gave you a nice home, fed you, I didn’t even make a pass at you. I didn’t do shit to you,” he hissed. “You think I can’t prove that? I’m a lawyer, for god's sake!”

You nearly laughed, “Okay, Andy,” you paused for a moment, “As a lawyer, who do you think everyone’ll believe? Someone who the world was on a wild goose chase for in the last two weeks? Or the man with a family history of violence? Must I remind you that your father and your son have killed people?”

Andy shook his head, face pinched in sorrow at the mention of his deceased son, clearly a low blow. “You’re insane,” he muttered.

“Swear to god that you won’t tell a soul what happened here,” you leaned over him, getting right in his face. “Or I promise, Andrew Barber, I will ruin you. You’ll spend the rest of your life behind bars, or disbarred, or whatever the hell I decide to do with you. So keep your goddamn lips shut.”

You pulled away and he solemnly nodded, not bothering to put up a fight. You loosened the fabric around his left wrist and walked out of the room. You picked up the keys to Andy’s Audi on your way out, checking the time as you adjusted the driver's seat.

9:45 PM. Fatherhood really changed the man.

You pushed that thought aside and began your drive home, which turned out to be a surprisingly short trip. When you pulled up in front of your home, you were met with a slew of reporters outside of the house, along with a police car that seemed to be permanently camped there.

As you slowly got out of the car, a gasp, followed by a loud silence fell across the crowd. You limped for dramatic effect up the driveway as cameras followed you, and glanced back at them pathetically. From your peripheral view, you noticed the officers get out of their vehicle.

You finally got to your door, ringing the doorbell and waiting. You blinked harshly a few times, conjuring up the tears you needed to really make a spectacle of the event. After a few minutes, Ransom opened the door, eyes widening as he looked at you. He stepped out, and you wrapped him in as big of a hug as you could manage, genuinely missing his embrace. It was possible that you even let out a few real tears in the moment.

Your emotional embrace was interrupted by the man you recognized as Lieutenant Elliott, the same officer who’d been assigned to Harlan’s case.

“Ma’am,” he began, only to be shut down by you.

“Please, just let me be with my boyfriend,” you pleaded, crocodile tears streaming down your face as you spoke with the officer. You still needed time to get your story straight.

“Just give us the night, Lieutenant. We’ll come in first thing tomorrow morning,” Ransom added, furrowing his brows at the officer that he’d come into contact with far too many times.

He looked to his partner, who shrugged, then to you, “enjoy your night.”

Cameras flashed around you as civilians, journalists, and newscasters alike attempted to catch your attention. You grabbed Ransom’s hand and dramatically pulled him inside, insincerely attempting to hide your face by ducking and covering half of your face with your arm.

As soon as you were in the privacy of your own home, Ransom threw you against a wall.

“Why. The fuck. Would you pull a stunt like that,” he hissed through gritted teeth, eyes wild, and a hand around your throat.

You whimpered as he tightened his grip, rage clearly flowing through his system uncontrollably.

“Do you know what you did to me? You almost had me thrown in fucking jail. Do you understand that?”

You nodded weakly, “Ran,” you whispered, “the baby,” you glanced down at your stomach.

He paused, dropping his grip on your neck and staring at you in awe, “no…”

You nodded again.

“How…? You told me you were on the pill… You- you made me use protection…”

“Surprise?” you said weakly.

“You’re a psychotic bitch.”

“I’m your psychotic bitch. And no child of mine will be born out of wedlock,” you taunted.

“That’s what this is about?” Ransom laughed manically. “You did this all because I won’t fucking marry you?”

You didn’t even have to respond.

“I should send you to the loony bin right fucking now.”

“What happened to all those things you said to me on TV?”

“You’re fucking delusional. I can’t do this.”

“Yes, you can. And you will. I’ve had to put up with you and your stupid little antics for way too long. How do you think I felt when you killed your own grandfather?”

Ransom scoffed, throwing his hands up in exasperation, “you are so fucked up.”

“I’m the fucked up one? You killed your own blood in cold blood! You’re unhinged!”

“You faked your own death for attention, and got pregnant while doing it! Is that baby even mine?”

“The fuck are you trying to say, Hugh?”

“I asked if it’s even mine.”

“Really. You’re accusing me of cheating on you. That’s rich considering Mia, Layla, and whoever the fuck else. You’re being ridiculous.”

“I’m being ridiculous? You couldn’t have a normal adult conversation with me!”

“Are you kidding me? I asked you time after time to marry me and it was always some bullshit excuse!” you wagged a finger in his face as you spoke. “Oh, commitment scares me, oh, marriage is just a piece of paper, oh-“ you mocked his voice in a deeper tone before you were cut off by the sting of his hand against your cheek.

“Can you shut the hell up?” he growled at you as you held your own cheek, before you reached out and slapped him back, “I can’t believe that I’m stuck with such a deranged bitch for the rest of my life.”

“Maybe work on your vows a little, dear. I don’t think that those words are as charming to me as they’d be to the rest of our family and friends.”

“You can’t be serious,” he groaned.

“But I am,” you hummed, rubbing your cheek softly once again. “Look at how fast your life fell apart without me here. How quickly the public turned on you. Imagine how upset they’d be if you left me. I love you, Ran. I really do. You and I are perfect for each other, can’t you see that now?”

Ransom took a step away from you, pacing slowly in front of you. He ran a stressed hand through his hair, and took a long and drawn out breath, clearly at a loss for words.

“So when should we have the wedding? I’ve always wanted a Spring wedding, and I know it’s a little short notice, but I don’t want to be showing too much in my wedding dress,” you grabbed Ransom’s bicep gently, as if you were just having a regular old day with him, as if you hadn’t been choked and slapped moments ago. “But we can make it work. We always make it work, right?”

Your now fiancé stared vacantly at the wall ahead of him, giving you a slow, empty nod of agreement.

“It’s settled then,” you smirked. “I’ll start looking at venues. You find me a nice ring, okay Honey? One that puts all those other bitches’ rings to shame,” you sighed pleasantly to yourself, “I’ve waited a long time for this, sweetheart.”

You pressed a soft kiss to his cheek before hurrying up the stairs and into your bedroom. You heard a distant shriek of “fuck,” from Ransom, but you truly could not care less.

You hopped into bed, grabbing your laptop from its charger and promptly opening it. You couldn’t help but to smile at your own reflection on the empty black screen. This wasn’t how you imagined your engagement, but you did the impossible. You tied yourself down to Hugh Ransom Drysdale, he went down kicking in screaming, and you were likely in for a lifetime of cheating and resentment, but you did it nonetheless.

You finally won.

#ransom drysdale x reader #ransom drysdale x you #dark!reader #ransom drysdale x dark!reader #ransom thrombey x reader #ransom thrombey x you #knives out #knives out fanfic #siris5ksoftdarkchallenge

275 notes · View notes

blu-joons · 3 years

Text

DATING SEVENTEEN A⇴Z HEADCANON ⇴ Kwon Soonyoung

A ⇴ AFFECTION

Soonyoung is always incredibly soft with any affection that he gives you, he loves to have his arms around you, whether it’s your waist, neck, or shoulders, he’ll take whatever he can get when it comes to being close to you.

B ⇴ BEFORE DATING

You were instantly drawn the charming smile he had when the two of you first went to the same coffee store. He caught your eye in the queue, and you could only manage a smile back at him before the waitress called you forwards and took your order, aware that Soonyoung’s eyes were firmly watching you.

C ⇴ CONFESSION

The two of you coincidentally kept bumping into each other at the store most mornings, almost as if it was fate. You never said a word to each other until one time you went to give your order only to be told it was already sorted. Soonyoung had learnt your order off by heart and paid for your coffee when he saw you walking into the store on the promise that you’d let him take you out for dinner whenever you had the time.

D ⇴ DATES

You’re both fond of adventuring on your dates and exploring plenty of new places. Soonyoung will drive you around for hours to find hotspots for dates and quiet places. Sometimes just driving around is enough for the two of you, especially at night. You’ll stop by a drive-thru and order yourselves from food, turn the speakers up high in the car and just go in whichever direction you decide, making the most of the peace and quiet from it all and also the time that you get to spend with each other and just be able to talk.

E ⇴ EXPERIENCE

Soonyoung had zero dating experience before he met you, and so he relied on those around him to give him a lot of tips when it first came to impressing you. You could tell that he was nervous when your relationship first began, he often mumbled apologies out of fear that he was doing something wrong or had perhaps missed a trick. It took a lot of reassurance from you to allow him to settle and trust that what he was doing was alright, but as he learned more about dating, he definitely began to settle in your relationship more too.

F ⇴ FIGHTING

If there’s ever something that has upset you or angered you, Soonyoung is always very understanding and willing to help to make a change. He’s not someone who gets upset if you find yourself wanting to argue, he’s the first to admit that he’s not perfect, and if he can do something to make your life easier, then he’ll definitely do it. Similarly, with you, if something frustrates him about you, he’ll understand that the two of you are different people and at sometimes differences can appear, it’s just about working through it and moving forwards. It takes a lot to argue with him, or at least try and create a disagreement between you both.

G ⇴ GETTING TO KNOW HIS FAMILY

Finding the time in Soonyoung’s busy schedule is hard to be able to meet his family, but whenever he has the chance, he’ll take you to visit his family. They’ve heard enough about you from Soonyoung to know that they’ll love you but meeting you in person far exceeds all of their expectations for the person that you are.

H ⇴ HOME

He often spends more time at the studio then his home anyway, so Soonyoung won’t be too fussed wherever he settles. If it’s easier for him to head back to the dorm at night, then he will, or if yours is better, he’ll arrive there. Soonyoung is in no rush to find a place together, which you’re understanding of when he’s so busy.

I ⇴ “I LOVE YOU”

When he came home from tour and reunited with you, Soonyoung couldn’t help but tell you that he loved you. He never imagined that he’d struggle as much as he did with not being able to see you, but as he thought about it, the emotions that he felt of not being able to be around you added up to one answer, that he loved you.

J ⇴ JEALOUSY

Soonyoung is someone who is full of confidence, so he’ll pit himself against any other guy quite happily and know that you’d pick him, therefore he doesn’t tend to get jealous too often. He also appreciates that you have other people in your life who aren’t him, and so if you want to spend your time with someone else, then he’ll understand that and won’t allow himself to get jealous. Although he can’t hide the fact that he’ll be relieved when you get home to him, and answer all of his questions about how your day was.

K ⇴ KIDS

The two of you talked about your future from time to time, finding it important to see if you were on the same trajectories. Soonyoung loved to tell you all about how he hoped to be able to teach his children dancing in the future, having kids was a huge deal to him, but having children that would hopefully follow in his footsteps was a thought that made him very happy, and very excited for a future with you too.

L ⇴ LAUGHTER

There is never a bad day whenever you’re in Soonyoung’s company, he’s one of the main members who can help to create a light and happy atmosphere. He also hates whenever you’ve had a bad day and come home sad, he always works hard to pick up anyone when they’re feeling down, but especially you. He’ll work tirelessly to try and make you smile again, no matter how long it takes or how down you’re feeling. He cares a lot about making sure that you live a happy life with him, and will put all his efforts into making you laugh, cracking joke after joke and forever making cheeky remarks that will make you grin.

M ⇴ MISSING

The true sign that the other members need to know that Soonyoung is missing you is when his own mood drops, and he becomes quiet. He’s always the one to pick the others up, so they’ll be the first ones there to pick him up whenever he needs it too. He’ll force a smile onto his face whenever he calls you, because he knows that you miss him. and he doesn’t want to make things worse for you. Not having him around to brighten the mood will be hard on all of the boys, they rely on him too, so they’ll try desperately to pick him up, not just for his own sake, but for keeping the moral of the rest of the group high as well.

N ⇴ NICKNAMES

You often end up calling Soonyoung, ‘energiser,’ because he just never stops. If he’s not dancing or singing, he’s talking or running around the place looking after you, he never seems to take a moment to breathe.

O ⇴ OBSESSION

He’s obsessed with your smile and making sure that you’re happy. Just the thought of you being down is heart breaking for him, so he’ll do whatever he can to make you smile.

P ⇴ PDA

Soonyoung is confident in your relationship, so he definitely doesn’t mind about being affectionate with you in public. Whilst he doesn’t do anything to draw attention to the two of you, the way he holds you in public sends a clear message to those watching you both that he’s in love with you and a very happy guy too.

Q ⇴ QUESTIONS

Whenever he comes up with a new routine or sequence, Soonyoung will often ask you about it and see what you think. Your opinion means a lot to him, and so any steps that get approval from you instantly go towards the group too.

R ⇴ RANDOM FACTS

His phone album is full of random photos of you that he’s taken over the years. Quite a few of them are unflattering and taken from the worst angles, but those ones are also Soonyoung’s favourites because even though you’re at your worst, he still loves the way you look. Every single photo goes a long way to helping him when he’s on tour and picking his mood up whenever he’s missing you, bringing a smile back to his face.

S ⇴ SEX

Soonyoung has a lot of energy when it comes to getting intimate with you, he never tires, and never complains either. He’s always very physical around you, he loves to keep you nice and close and guide you into positions that he loves to get you in. There’s never too much distance between the two of you, and if you start to tire, then Soonyoung will encourage you to relax and let him do all the work to make you feel good.

T ⇴ TEXTS

If he’s not able to see you throughout the day, then he’ll often send you videos of the things that he’s getting up to so you can still feel as if you’re there with him and take note of the places he’s visits for your future date nights too.

U ⇴ UNIVERSE

Your support is by far the thing that means the most to Soonyoung, knowing that he has someone who is permanently backing him and pushing him to achieve his dreams is the boost he needs to make sure that he keeps going.

V ⇴ VACATION

Going on holiday is a treat for you both regardless of where you are in the world. The two of you will often decide on a place, and if you can’t, you’ll take a globe and drop a pin in it, wherever it lands, the two of you go. As long as you’re adventuring then you’re both happy no matter where you are in the world.

W ⇴ WHINING

Soonyoung tends to lean towards liking your attention, and whilst he can deal without it for a while, if you leave it too long, he’ll let you know about it.

X ⇴ XXXXX

Kisses from Soonyoung are always soft and sweet, whenever he has you in his hold it becomes an instinct for him to press a kiss against your cheek or against the side of your head. For him, your kisses are another form of support, almost as if you’re sealing your approval that he’s doing well and reminding him that you’re right there with him. They’re incredibly comforting and reassuring for him to know that you’re there.

Y ⇴ YOU

You’re his number one fan, always his cheerleader on the side-lines supporting him.

Z ⇴ ZZZ

He loves to be close to you at night, it’s comforting for him to be able to feel the quiet sounds of your breath and the feeling of you wriggling beside him as you try to get comfortable, settling eventually in his arms.

---

Masterlist

182 notes · View notes

urlocalnctstan · 3 years

Text

𝚆𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝙻𝚎𝚏𝚝 𝚄𝚗𝚜𝚊𝚒𝚍 - 𝙹.𝚂𝙶

• Candy Hearts Collab - @127-mile

Prompt : “I came to say goodbye.”

Genre : Angst, Fluff, kinda Slow-burnish?, Slice of life, highschool + college AU

Pairing : Sungchan X Reader (Ft. Jeno)

Warning(s) : mentions of bullying and injury (like one scene only), unrequited love, mentions of slight anxiety, hormonal shifts, language, minor character death

Writing nets : @kdiarynet @k-dinernet @kpopscape @czennienet @neoturtles

Taglist : @eh-ovo-nctu

WC : 9.7k

Summary : What people hated the most is the very word ‘goodbye’. However, it’s the very word that becomes something that you yearn to hear from Sungchan for years.

→ Playlist [recommended]

The sound of the rain was supposed to calm you down, not make you even more anxious and sweaty and you sat with your legs firmly pressed against each other, hoping to fill in the lack of company you were feeling amongst the swarm of people who perhaps shared the same dreams, same aim as yours. Public places as trains, trams, bus stops; you always thought they portrayed as the perfect definition for the word ‘sonder.’ Each individual having a life pretty much as complex as yours — sometimes a little less or sometimes a little more. It fascinated you.

“Do you think the trip is worth it?” Lee Jeno, your best friend of quite a few years puffs his cheeks as he stared dubiously at the red and white poster he held. You took a peek at it, the amount of times Jeno had been pestering you if he should really give up the money he had saved for PS5 as a sacrifice for this trip, it was safe enough for you to say that you had every words printed on it memorized. Well, maybe not every words but the main stuff at least.

“Lee Jeno,” You sharply gawked at the male sitting beside you, earning an ugly grimace from him. “Stop it already. I don’t know about you but I ain’t passing this chance.”

“Wah, what a nice friend I got.” You failed to notice the dramatic eye roll he makes before shoving the poster in his backpack, the one he had been using since the first day you had befriended him. Was it 5 years? 6 years?

“Are we five years or six years?” But I met him on that bookstore down my neighborhood, that was like spring of 2017 and now it’s 2021.

The male let out a snort. “If I am a five year-old then you are definitely still inside the womb.” Even though he was smiling with that ‘innocent eye smile’ the evil smirk sheathed beneath went unnoticed by you. No sooner had he opened his mouth, a fresh harsh smack landed on his arms that were clad in a filmsy material of cotton and thus a silent yelp of pain escaping from him as he grabbed the area which was starting to sting with each passing second. The smack, albeit meant for him, you were unable to ignore the similar stinging pain in your palm, tears pricking in the corners of your eyes. But you made sure to show absolutely no signs of distress; it was somewhat a matter of childish pride for you.

“Change your career aim from a perfumist to an assassinator will you?” If it were the campus grounds, you two would have already been latched at one another throats; both metaphorically and literally.

“I will gladly not.” You huffed at the male whose eyes held a scornful gaze, now even more annoyed or perhaps, as you would think most of the times, he was just exaggerating. You found yourself mindlessly scrolling through your gallery in search of the recent notes from Mr. Kim’s classes. Until you stumble across something you had been long avoiding, a forlorn fragment from the former days of your high school.

“Here lies the proof of my utmost love and affection, always devoted to my only Y/N.”

It was a picture of you smiling way too bright, cheeks and nose flushed red while being squished by the only male in the frame as he pressed a peck against your cheek. His neck was craned to the side, ripe ears clearly visible in the small Polaroid film. As much as you hated to admit, your heart would still make flips and turns whenever you run into something that reminded you of him, your very first love and first heart break—Jung Sungchan.

Jeno was too busy in his dreamland as he dozed off with his head resting peacefully against your shoulder. It was no new news that the lad had been immensely in love with you ever since the first time you saved him from getting bullied back in 9th grade. However, you were always too busy with your academics and extra-curricular activities and thus clearly drawing a line of only being friends. Nothing else. It happened when Jeno had finally mustered up the courage after excelling in his Maths Olympiad, where he made a bet that if he indeed secures a place in the top 5, you have to abide by anything he wishes for. But he wished for your love, something you were not really capable of doing so; especially at that time. You did not have the heart to say no when Jeno jogged up to you, his eyes transforming into crescents as he smiled wide. “I did it!” His words came out rather breathy, possibly because of him running to you, and maybe because how hard he could feel his heart thump against his ribs when he noticed the proud grin on your face. Without wasting any moment further, Jeno lets go of the white banner of achievement he had been holding, his hands now focusing on yours. You could almost feel the slight tremble and the wetness of his sweaty palms, but before you could even say anything he beat to you by saying, “Go out on a date with me. Only one.”

There were numerous times when you felt guilty about turning down Jeno. At times it had you baffled that why a guy like him would ever bother liking you so much. Jeno was incredibly talented; gifted with unfair boon of genius traits in both academics and athletics. His little version of him always demeaned his abilities, often failing to notice that how much more he was rather than just a quiet kid who loved coding and maths. Maybe perhaps that was the very reason for him to face the bullying, at least that’s what you thought when you first noticed him getting cornered by some stupid idiot dipshits from your class during recess. Jeno’s ID card lay discarded on the ground, as Kihyun grabbed its owner by the collar. You could not understand his reason for not fighting back, and thus being a silent spectator was never your thing so you decided to butt in. As much as you equally hated and liked one thing, boys seemed to get kinda wary of your presence. Especially boys like these who were already in the blacklist of the teachers. It did not take them long to pick their asses and run from the site when you glared them with a threatening gaze, a single word from the class president and they would get suspended yet again for the umpteenth time in the year. You crouched down to Jeno’s level, carefully handing him his ID. You did not bother asking him if he was okay, of course he wasn’t. His face showed signs of previous injuries, the purple hues of bruises slightly fading beside his jaws. You still don’t know why but you felt the need to protect him from his solace, thus leading to this inseparable bond of yours.

But that was a version of him that was long forgotten. Jeno had become the star and face of the school in the last years of your highschool. Acing various quiz competitions, Olympiads, getting highest grades, being the captain of the soccer and basketball team; you were sure God really had His favorites.

You were not surprised when Jeno brought you to your usual favourite—candle shop. It was a hidden gem in your hometown, a small secluded shop located just a few miles away from the metropolitan. Not everyone was aware of its existence until that one day you decided to act rebellious for once in your school life. Of course dragging Jeno into this so called rebel act with you. The date was rather casual, just two friends messing around with wax and chemically named perfume essences. The shop was owned by a lady close to your grandma’s age, and it still makes you wonder how on earth was she able to keep up with the hollering you two were making. No matter how much you convinced yourself that maybe you could give the boy a chance, and perhaps feelings might grow on you later on; you could not make yourself cloud your rationality with the uncertain possibilities. You confessed every single thing that had been on your mind and Jeno just calmly listened to everything you uttered. You could clearly see the expression of hurt washing over his face, but he knew you. He knew that once you had made up your mind, there was no going back. The night did not cause any indifference in your friendship; it bloomed with each passing years of your middle school and then highschool. You two had become the infamous bestfriends, the once timid boy then all buff and handsome and the once spotlight lover girl then buried in her textbooks to pass the college entrance exams.

Throughout these years of teen, the candle shop had become a constant place for anything to you both; sadness, comfort or just enjoyable times. Until that one day when you met the grandson of the lady who owned the shop. Make a guess who it was.

When people spoke of their first heartbreak, you always cringed at how they exaggerated. Technically you never experienced one, so it seemed ridiculous to you that how was it possible to a simple break to cause others this much pain. You were shocked, no scratch that. Using fancy words, you were utterly bewildered when you saw the new transfer student—Jung Sungchan was the name, standing on the makeshift podium of your classroom. Thank God the architects decided to stick to keeping the height of the room above eight feet. You had changed drastically, contrasting your previous bubbly persona, you had become more reserved. It was just you being ambitious about something you had grown to like, and after some backstabs from your friends, you did not feel the need to have so many around you. Just Jeno being there for you was more than enough.

It would be a lie if Jeno did not sense the subtle looks you had been sending over to the new guy, but he was in no place to object you. It had only been a few moments of Sungchan’s arrival and Jeno already sensed his position in your life being threatened. He knew you were a saint who always looked out for others, and something about his presence made Jeno feel wary. Jeno did not need any of the privileges he had, all of it he owed to you after all. It was you who brought the best out of him, and in the end if he has them all but not you, it wasn’t clearly worth it to him. You preferred unpredictable things; it was what he learned about you in all your years of friendship. How you would always choose mystery thrillers over typical rom-coms, how you would always vouch for the new dish in the menu every time you both visited the local barbecue house. And he knew it was impossible to be one like that, it was just typical Taurus things (as he would like to blame) that made him too practical, too predictable for you. But, you never thought like that. It was just that even though you wanted to, you couldn’t make yourself grow romantic towards the boy you always shared your oreos and ramen with. He held a dear place in your heart and life.

Sungchan was immediately welcomed to the family, the girls already swooning over his good looks and amazing grades. Plus icing on the top, he was the half-brother of the infamous Jung Yoonoh, the heartthrob of the whole school, from juniors to seniors. While Jaehyun was the typical definition of being that one dude we always see in rom-coms who is loved and admired by all for his too humble personality and ethics, Sungchan on the other hand was more of a quiet one, often too shy properly open up his orginal self around new environment. Despite that, he was naturally amiable just like his brother, a trait that perhaps ran in the Jung household. Unlike Jaehyun who was presumably born with good brains, Sungchan was a hardworking one. Sungchan tried to settle down the queasy feeling he had been feeling ever since he moved back here, now that Jaehyun was always busy in Seoul with his medical degree someone had to look after their aging grandma. Sungchan was never really a part of any group, so leaving behind his school back in the city was not that painful for him. The atmosphere of the whole campus was pretty soothing; the bushes of neatly trimmed trees, big huge playground and the ochre shaded building. He liked all of it, and to top it all the uniform was really his style: solid crème and dark maroon combination.

When Sungchan stood awkwardly in the middle of the classroom, clearly clueless as to where he would be seating since all the seats were occupied, a soft voice called out his name rather eagerly. His eyes scanned for a while until he saw you; dark hair tied up neatly into a ponytail with a pencil in your hand as you waved him to notice the empty seat beside yours. Sungchan smiled at your sweet gesture, his out of place feeling now subsiding into the warmth of the possible blooming friendship.

“Hi there, I am Y/N.” You chirped, wiping your left hand before bringing it out for him to shake. Sungchan froze for a while before he realized what he was supposed to be doing. “Oh! And this is Jeno!” You turned slightly towards your best friend sitting just behind you with his famous eye smile.

“Hello, I am Jung Sungchan.” He returned the gesture shaking both your and Jeno’s hand. Whilst Jeno had the feeling of roughness and athleticism in his, your hands were warm and soft; it felt nice he thought. That was the first impression of yours to him: ball of sunshine. And your impression of him? Reserved and unpredictable; a combination that only meant chaos and imbalance.

Sungchan side-glanced at your fumbling state. Seating next to him you in the front row, you skimmed over your not so pleasant looking notes that you had scribbled anxiously in the prior night. Public speaking had never been a big deal for you once you get adjusted to the audience after going up on stage. However, it is the pre anxiety session that just always riles you up.

“You know,” Your head whipped a bit too fast to your liking at the voice belonging to the only male that sat beside you. “I’ll show you a trick. Here.” Sungchan proceeded to softly place your trembling hands on his, cautiousness apparent with every move he made. Even though you both had been seatmates for the last three months, you never found yourself involved in any sort of skinship with him; something that was really common for you and Jeno. The look of fluster was way too obvious when Sungchan softly rubbed various shapes on the back of your hand with his thumb, you were unsure if he was actually helping you ease from nervousness or just increasing it further. It had quite been a while since you had your hands caged in his, both of you completely unaware of the looks you had been getting from your senior teachers seated in the neighboring row. The moment was cut off when your name was announced from the stage by a senior, requesting your presence to commence your speech. Sungchan slowly lets go of your hands, mumbling a soft ‘best of luck!’ with his hands now fisted as an act of verbal encouragement. You eyes wandered around the crowd for a while before locating your best friend who sat miserably beside the homeroom teacher, really closing to dozing off before noticing your presence and copying Sungchan’s gestures.

The bus paused, Jeno still deep in his slumber despite the harsh jerk of the vehicle stopping in its tracks. You sighed, he must have probably been gaming the whole night with his roommate Donghyuck again. You nudged softly at first, the lack of response later than causing you to shake him vigorously by his toned arms that barely fit in your palms. Jeno instantly sprinted up with wide eyes before softly muttering a curse at your cruel way of waking him up.

“I was definitely right about you being a torturer in your previous life.”

“Sure you were. Get your ass off the bus now.”

You parted your ways with Jeno on the campus ground, him heading to his coding facult while you headed towards the chemistry club room. Apparently a newbie was supposed to come today from the US. It was odd you assumed since US had much better facilities for students majoring in chemistry. You glanced at your figure on your way to the room, wondering if the ripped jeans were a good choice as a first impression. You just disliked the idea of leaving off bad impressions, even if you are never going to meet the person again until your next life. Jaemin, another close friend of both you and Jeno smiled widely at your entrance, waving his hand as he pointed the seat next to him enthusiastically. Jaemin and you were basically clones of each other, the leos inside of you both shinig at its best whenever you two are together.

“I don’t understand why move back here from THE United States.” Jaemin dragged out the word, scoffing silently as he handed you a cup of iced Americano. You were about to sip before pausing. You could not have possibly risked your stomach again after that one fateful day when you tasted ‘his type’ of iced Americano. This dude legit gulped down eight espresso shots with a satisfied hum, horrified looks painted on your and Jeno’s features as you both just stared at him in utter shock.

“Please not the poisonous drink.” You eyed the male suspiciously, who scoffed at the nickname.

“Of couse not little baby.” Jaemin cooed with his lips puckered and an annoying high pitched voice, purposefully pinching your cheeks a bit harder than he usually does.

“You little moth-”

“Hello guys, I am Sungchan. Nice to meet you all.” Your heart dropped at the familiar tone of voice. He isn’t possibly back again after leaving without any traces, without a single goodbye, is he? You did not dare to look at his figure standing in front of the table, awkwardly shifting in your seat while Jaemin furrowed his eyebrows in confusion.

“Hello, Sungchan.” Sulli, your senior by 2 years and also the president of the club greeted him warmly. “I hope you like it here because adjusting to a new place might be hard at times. Oh, these are your classmates; Y/N and Jaemin.”

Sungchan immediately looked in your direction at the mention of your name, his eyes equally wide in surprise mirroring your previous reaction.

“Y/N?” He called out in a rather unsure tone, just like his movements the cautiousness was also present there. “It’s been……a while….”

“Yeah, indeed.” You had a visible change in demeanor, Jaemin finally grasping the tense situation before jogging up to the male.

“Hi there, I am Na Jaemin. You can call me Nana if you want.” Jaemin put his hand out as a formality, to which Sungchan politely complied. “There’s a seat there you can sit.” Jaemin was luckily wise enough to occupy the empty seat beside yours without knowing the turn of events. He motioned Sungchan towards the seat diagonal to you, sensing the discomfort in your posture he assumed it was best if Sungchan sat somewhat further.

Concentrating on the yearly planning for the club was harder with his presence; Sungchan unable to hide his obvious lingering gaze on you. Jaemin would cough every now and then, signaling the male to focus on the club president’s instructions instead of you. But as his usual self, Sungchan pretended to not notice the clear hints, continuing keep his eyes locked on yours. You were barely able to note down some important events, knowing that Jaemin certainly cannot be trusted with his short time memory. After that president bids her farewell to everyone present in the room, you take it as your cue to just flee as soon as possible from his reach.

“Y/N, wait!” Sungchan was quick to grab you just as you were about to exit by the door, the sudden halt in movement causing you to stumble back into his embrace awkwardly. You were definitely embarrassed, your back pressed against his chest in a weird manner as you straighten yourself again. You scrunched you nose to hide your embarrassment before asking him.

“What is it now Jung Sungchan?” You were not meaning to snap at him, but the bitter memories of the past seemed to get the best of you.

Sungchan slightly winced at your cold tone, but what else could have expected after all the pain he had caused you. “I…I do..I mean like I..”

“Sungchan, I have my classes. Gather up your thoughts and then talk.” With that you turned on your heels, not even bothering to take your bag that you left on the seat you were prior sitting. Jaemin observed the scene quietly, his minds finally connecting the dots. Jung Sungchan, the boy you would always cry about whenever you got drunk, the boy who left you with nothing but memories of him. Jaemin thought it was best to not let out his inner frustration towards the guy who was now standing motionless in his tracks, lost in his trance as he gaped towards the door you had just left. Jaemin passed by Sungchan without a word, instinctively grabbing your bag as he made his way to his next class.

Sungchan stood dumbfounded, numerous thoughts racing in his mind. Why did I have to be so foolish? He thought. How can I blame her when I was the one who broke the promise first?

Summer 2017

It was getting pretty boring for you at the library; usually some of the classmates bickering would give you some sort of silent company as you scribble down the notes. But for some unfound reason you seemed to be extremely distracted. You let out a long annoyed huffed, hands stretching in weird directions as you rested your head on the wooden table. It struck your mind there might be butts of nails pointed out and you didn’t want to get yourself a shot of tetanus, so you lazily glided your hands across the surface before returning back to your half laying position. It didn’t take long for you to zone out, mind running through various scenarios of university life, jobs and perhaps marriage? You blushed at the thought, just like any other teen you were also low-key always looking forward to your wedding.

“Are you asleep?” You shot up startled at the sudden voice, eyes immediately widening as you realized the owner. Sungchan had a smile with his lips pressed into a thin line, casually pulling out the empty seat beside yours as he made himself comfortable on it.

“Good to know you’re not. I need your help.” Sungchan wasted no time rummaging out a stack of sheets from his backpack, pressing them against the wood with a loud thump. You slightly winced at the loudness since the library was extra quiet today, the sound thus bouncing off more.

“You know if it’s literature, I suck at it.” Your mind took you back at that one time when you almost got yourself a C on the mentioned subject, chills running down at the memory.

“No, no.” Sungchan waved his hands softly chuckling. “It’s actually chemistry. Judging as a seatmate, I believe it’s your best sport.”

You happily nodded at the male, pleased that you get to help him with something that was under your specialty. Sungchan took a notice of your happy state, equally pleased that it was you that would be helping him.

“Tell me, what can I help you with.” You took the fat book from his hold, skimming over the contents page before highlighting the topics that were extremely important for the semester.

“I think hybridization? I just can’t seem to get how it works!” Sungchan’s voice levitated suddenly out of frustration, momentarily catching you off guard. Sungchan seemed to notice your amused look, shyly rubbing the nape of his neck with a little shrug.

“You know this is the first time I’ve seen you frustrated.” You commented, eyes fixated on the pages even though they were being extremely reluctant to rather focus on the fussy male. “It’s pretty easy you know. Look.” You explained him cautiously and slowly, how the overlapping of the orbitals occurred not realizing the proximity that seemed to lessen drastically. You whipped at his direction to see any signs of confusion, only to be met with a pair of dark orbs that stared at you intently. As embarrassing as it may sound, you gulped loudly. A bit too loud than you had intended to.

Sunghcan took notice of the situation you both blanketed in as a wave of déjà vu washed over him. He cleared his throat loud and awkward, half to lessen the embarrassment you were feeling and to poorly hide his own. You both were looking everywhere but each other, too dumb to maximize the close distance instead of acting like awkward cats.

“What are you both doing?” a deep male voice jerked you back to reality, upon turning you saw it belonged to Jeno. When did he come here?

“She was explaining the hybridization shits.” Sungchan huffed, slowly settling back to his orginal position. “I asked you so many times though…”

“You know chemistry is not my cup of tea.” Jeno shrugged at the male, a lazy smile playing on his face. “You wanna stay for b-ball practice today?”

“Not sure, I’ll see to it mate.” Sungchan did that fist-bump with Jeno, the two casually mingling like old friends as you stared idiotically at the scene unfolding in front of you.

“Since when did you both become Damon and Pythias?”

“Y/N, please not again your alien languages.” Jeno rolled his eyes before taking the seat beside, sandwiching you between both the males. “Since you happen to be tutoring a clown, an addition of another clown won’t do you any harm.” Jeno smiled at you, his doe eyes disappearing in the process.

Sungchan held back his snort, looking over both of you, he was happy. Though he was not as close to you as he had become to Jeno, he still considered you somewhat a close friend of his. Being seatmates with you and Jeno, it was inevitable that he soon became a constant in your life. Did I tell you that the candle shop was owned by his grandma? The shop if anything, had become this secret spot for you three. Study dates, random chills or just lazying around, the candle shop would be the first name that would pop up in your mind.

With a blink of an eye perhaps junior year passes. Maybe that was how last years of highschool were. At one moment you barely just got promoted to a new class, and at another, you’re yet again getting promoted to higher one. You sat under the dull moonlight, a thin cardigan that was gifted to you by your dearest friend’s grandma. When Sungchan invited you and Jeno at his, his grandma had knitted this cardigan for you and a beanie for Jeno. The gesture was so sweet that it completely melted your heart, she was the living definition of wholesome for you.

It was maybe that one day when you three decided to stroll the spring fair of your neighborhood, when you both finally came clean to your feelings. Jeno was always the one pointing you out that how you should just be a woman and confess. “It doesn’t always have to be the guy that says I LIKE YOU!” This what we he said before disappearing into the hives of crowds, leaving you waiting for Sungchan at the front of the public toilet he was finishing his business in. Pretty awkward right? Where else does anyone get to see a girl waiting for her crush in front of a public restroom. Sungchan came back outside, shuffling out his handphone before furrowing his brows at the text he just received. You immediately understood it was from Jeno. You had no idea what came over you, it felt like the adrenaline in your system decided to flood your nervous system, not even aware of yourself just launching at the dude with a chaste kiss on his lips. He was completely taken aback by the sudden feeling of your lips on his, it took him a while before responding you back with the same enthusiasm. You broke first from the kiss, not realising your fists crunching his prior perfectly ironed shirt. But he did not mind it all, a shy smile playing on both of your faces. The rest of the night was spent with your hands laced in his, just like another high school sweethearts of the time.

You smiled at the memory. Sungchan had a cigarette lit between the tips of his fingers, the tobacco smoke slowly poking your nose but not strong enough to bother you. With a deep sigh, he took a puff before blowing it own again in the air, a cloud of smog dancing around his figure.

“You should quit it, it’s not healthy.” It had already been a year since you became friends and six months since you became more than it, but there were times like this when you still found yourself nervous and wary whenever you are talking to him. You snuggled yourself into the cardigan, hugging yourself to minimize the tinges of frostbites. Sungchan was considerate of your discomfort, whenever he smoked, he made sure the cigarette was at least 2 feet away from you.

“Take this.” Sungchan handed you another thick layer of clothing from his bag, his initials “J.SG” written big and bold. Without much thought, you accepted his kindness, and Sungchan had high tolerance to cold anyways unlike you who would shiver to death in the most usual temperatures. You figured Sungchan decided to dodge the topic you brought it, and you figured it would be better to not bring it up for a while.

“Where do you plan on going for college.” Sungchan spoke while rubbing the shortened cigarette on the bricks of the roof, swallowing the remaining water from his bottle throwing a strawberry gum inside his mouth. You figured he was now free from the reek of tobacco as you scoot closer to his form, opening your arms within the jacket for his to snuggle in as well. Just like Jeno, skinship was no new news for you both too, however; it always had your heart racing like crazy. You both remained cozy under the warm embrace of the jacket, and you prayed Sungchan would never listen how your pulse was acting up.

“I don’t know. Perhaps SNU? I mean only if I get accepted...” You trailed off, propping your chin against your bent knees before glancing at the boy. Then it struck you, what made him ask this sudden question, what made him smoke three cigarettes straight despite having yearly break for a whole month. “Will you be going to the US as well?”

“I don’t know...” Sungchan deeply sighed, his lips forming a small pout as he indulged in deep thought. What if he actually happens to leave for America? Your heart clenched at the thought, mimicking his sighs you rested your head against his shoulder.

“You know,” You stared at the sky, it was dark and clear with no signs of stars. The feeling was unsettling. “Wherever you go, we’ll always be there for you.” Your eyes shifted to the illuminating lights from numerous buildings that replaced the absence of the twinkling stars in the sky. The ominous feeling soon dissipated into relief. It was as if the universe telling you, we just have to look out for the good sides instead of dwelling on the bad.

“I know.” Sungchan smiled, one that was both happy and sad. He rested his head on yours, joining your company of gazing at the scenery. “I know.”

“Just...” there was hesitation laced in your tone, Sungchan was quick to notice it as he looked at you, nodding for you to continue. “Please don’t leave...not without a goodbye. Promise me that.”

“I promise you.” Sungchan held your cold hands in his warmer ones, a firm assurance making your heart swell in both hurt and adoration as you kissed him again.

You both never really made it official, despite the kiss at the fair. It was perhaps the uncertainty that held you both back. Sungchan’s future was not in his hands but his family’s; just like his brother, he is supposed to make his family shine bright. It was one of the major reasons why his parents let both the brothers two years of freedom on their remaining bits of high school. ‘All parents want the best for their kids,’ that’s what you would always say to him whenever you meet him at his roof; him smoking while you offered his physical comfort.

The senior year passed within a whim, the fright of entering into adulthood descending upon all the students as they remained buried in their textbooks. Maybe it wasn’t the case for everyone, but it did apply to you and your friends. You remained occupied with you daily extra classes for chemistry while Sungchan had biology and Jeno had mathematics. You three would meet up in periodic breaks, catching up with small talks before returning back to your respective schedules. It was nothing but hectic, and soon, the candle shop returned back to being just another isolated shop in your hometown.

Graduation day was filled with smiles and congratulatory phrases from different individuals, throwing your grad caps in the air felt like as if you were throwing away a significant part of your life, ready to embrace a new version of you. All the parents stood their with proud grins, delighted at their children’s achievement to their dreams.

“Congratulations!” You chirped, receiving bone crushing hugs from both your males before an elderly voice called for you.

“Y/N! Jeno! Sungchan!” It was your mom, waving excitedly to grab you and the males’ attention. “Say cheese!”

“Cheese!” You all resonated together, happy and delighted.

A series of furious knocks jolted you awake from your sleep. You figured it might have been your younger brother, probably wanting your help in his homework.

“I swear to god Y/b/n!” You let out an ear piercing shout, groggily rubbing your eyes from deep slumber.

“It’s me. Jeno.” You heard how breathy his voice sounded, it was coated with urgency and hurt. You heart dropped but you prayed to the Heavens and God, you prayed that it should not be the very thing that you had been dreading so much. You shot up from your bed, not even bothering to make yourself look presentable before whipping the door open to meet with an equally dazed and riled Jeno.

“It’s Sungchan. He...” Jeno beathed out a deep sigh, before handing you a lilac envelope, the initials J.SG written in bold. You failed to feel the tears pooling up, threatening to fall anytime. Jeno glanced over you sympathetically, with shaky trembling hands, you took the the paper.

You don’t bother to closer the door, Jeno soon taking his leave as he thought it would be best to give you some space to absorb it all in. The tears had started to stream uncontrollably when you saw the picture that came with the letter. It was one of the many pictures that you took on the night of the fair; the day you had confessed, the you had your first kiss. It was a polaroid of you holding him lovingly in an embrace, him shyly placing a kiss on your cheeks with the words ‘Here lies the proof of my utmost love and affection, always devoted to my only Y/N’ scribbled on the white frame. Your hands fished for your cellphone, frantically dialing his number as you waited for him to pick up, hoping that he’ll soothe your anxiety by saying he did not leave, that he was still in town and you were just being delusional.

But every time you dialed his contact, you were being forwarded to the monotonous tone saying that the number was currently unreachable. Your chest squeezed in pain, he had promised you. He promised you that he will come for a goodbye at least. He had promised you that he would never leave you clueless and hurting. All you ever asked for him, was just a goodbye; perhaps a source assurance for you to wait for his return.

You wiped the tears with the edge of your sleeves, opening the the piece of folded paper.

‘Dear lovely Y/N,

You might resent me when you receive this letter, and I certainly don’t blame you for that. I am not the best with words, I am clumsy and unexpressive but I hope that this piece of scribblings makes you understand all my feelings, my thoughts and emotions that have been haunting me from the day I first saw you.

You know I that I am very much aware that I do....hold some handsome genes.’ You couldn’t help but snicker at this.

‘However, unlike all, as typical as it may sound, you stood out. You lazily laid sprawling across your desk in deep slumber, completely unaware of the chaos of classroom. I wish I was that carefree like you, indulged in her own world and comfort bubble. It attracted me a lot.’ You got up from the floor, eyes still glued to the piece of paper as you shut your door locked. Your hands still went to dial his contact, but only to be forwarded to that damned robotic voice.

‘I wanted to be like you, not bothered by the constant pressures of coming from a prestigious family. Did I ever tell you my dad is the Director of Myeongsu Hospital?’ You gasped at the sudden information. His dad was the director of the one of the most prestigious and renowned hospitals of South Korea. It was too overwhelming for you to process, but you still found yourself continuing.

‘It was inevitable for me to act like just another teenager, not for me but for my brother too. I always blamed him for being so selfish when he just left me alone when he came to grandma, I failed to realize that it was some sort of comfort gift from our parents so that we’ll devote ourselves to build the family’s name for the rest of our lives.

Even though I wanna blame them, I don’t think I can because they had the same fate. It comes with a price when you’re born with a silver spoon, and I guess I had to pay mine when I left your doorstep last night. I...I was a coward. I know I should have just come up, hug you and kiss you for the last time. But I just couldn’t. I was too scared.

I was scared that the moment I’ll see you, my guards will crash down. These two days were really hectic for me, I made up excuses when you invited me at yours because I was afraid of losing my balance. I knew that only a glance at you would be enough to make me change my mind and revolt against my parents, my fate. And you have no idea how much I wanted to do so, you have no idea how I’ve spent endless of sleepless night where it is the only thing that would run on my mind. But you tell me, would it be really worth it? I did not want you spending the rest of your lives with swarming paps and reporters, publishing reports and articles of how you managed to tarnish the heir-in-line of the prestigious hospital. No I could never do to that someone I love so dearly. I could never in a thousand years do that.

You know every time I picture you in your grown-up self, I can only see a strong and confident woman thriving in her career, a woman that is so powerful but still has a heart of gold. I know that you’ll be an amazing person, inside and out. I wasn’t really planning to express my love and admiration for you like this, I hoped to do it in person, but perhaps, maybe that’s how the stars planned it out for us. Fate is extra cruel in my case don’t you think?

It would be extremely selfish of me to ask you to wait; I am not even sure if I would ever return because my father would be opening another branch in US. And well, I am not sure what plans he has for me.

So please, if you ever find it in your heart, I hope you will forgive me. And even if you don’t, please don’t ever feel guilty about it. You have all the right to do so and I most certainly deserve your hatred. I love you so much, Y/N. You’re my first kiss, my first love, and you’ll always hold this irreplaceable place in my heart.

With Love,

Jung Sungchan.

You felt your world crashing down, a part of you wished that this letter never ended. The only remain from him had also come to an end, and you were not sure how you would be able to cope with his absence for the next years of your life.

Present

“Sungchan is back?” Jeno widened his eyes in shock, the information seemingly unbelievable to him. “He really is?”

“Yes.” You monotonously replied, numerous thoughts battling at the back of your head. Jaemin cleared his throat, a sign for Jeno to not bring up the topic for a while. Jeno eyed the male in confusion before finally getting the hint.

“You’re lucky you don’t get to have Mr.Suh’s classes, he’s just hot and it’s frustrating. And that’s coming from a straight dude like me.” Jeno slurped on his smoothie loud and sound, probably to annoy the other male as he was well aware his distaste to people making sounds while eating.

“Y/N.” a voiced called out from behind, and you instantly knew who it belonged to.

“Sungchan. Oh my god!” Jeno shot up from his seat, immediately embracing the old face from his past. “How have you been man? You just disappeared...”

“I am so sorry.” Sungchan looked at Jeno with pleading eyes. “I know I have absolutely no excuse for my act and I am just so sorry, Jeno and Y/N.” Sungchan looked at Jeno who silently urged him to talk to you.

“Y/N, please talk to me. I don’t expect your forgiveness but please. Atleast curse me, hit me just do anything. Please.”

You whipped your head to find Sungchan crouching down to match your seat level, a sigh escaping from you as you stood straight from your seat.

“Guys, I’ll be back.” You gripped his hands before dragging him alongside the canteen corridor.

Jaemin looked over his friend who stood staring at the way you just took. And expressionless look was painted on his features, causing Jaemin to shake his head and sigh. “You know man,” Jeno changed his attention to the male speaking, fixing his glasses. “If I were you, I would have just held her back. You’re extremely strong, I could have never done that.” With that Jaemin patted his friend’s back, a silent assurance that if he needed a shoulder to cry or to simply lean on for comfort, he’ll be there for him.

A mixture of feelings were erupting inside you, you were furious but happy. Sad but grateful. You scanned the halls for signs of any empty classroom and upon finding one you just shoved the male inside it.

“What’s so funny about messing with my feelings?” You already tears welling up, your vision blurry as you sharply glance at the male with a frown on his face.

“Y/N, I would nev-”

“You left me,” you utterly hated at how pathetic you sounded at the moment, harshly wiping the tears streaming down your cheeks. “You promised me that you won’t leave without showing up one last time, but you did. You fucking did.” You knew it was not something under his control, but you couldn’t help but pour your bottled feelings.

“Please...Y/N...listen..to me...Please..” Sungchan lost his composure, his voice breaking as he stepped closer to you. Seeing how you did not flinch at his approach, Sungchan captivated you in his embrace, something that he had been yearning for ever since he parted ways. You felt the wetness of his tears on your head, melting in his longing embrace you found yourself hugging him back. You missed him so much, his scent, warmth, presence. Everything about him drove you crazy, you were still dazed to believe if he was actually back for real or is it just one of your numerous daydreams.

The rest of the days went as usual, but only with the addition of Sungchan back again in your life. Although you had long forgiven him in his heart, you decided to not vocal it out. As heartless as it may sound, you wanted him to make up for the pain he caused you, and he indeed did. Jaemin was skeptical in the beginning at the idea of another person joining you small group, he had come to liking the idea of you guys as trio and was more comfortable like that. But he saw how your eyes lit up every time you about him when you were newly friends with Jaemin, how Jeno would always drunk talk about the times they passed as seatmates bothering the hell out of you. So Jaemin broke his exterior cold composure on the fourth day, finally accepting the banana milk from the new male as a form of bribe for his addition to the group.

Sungchan worked harder than deities; always making sure to get you Americanos before your classes, taking extra notes for you whenever you felt sick, tolerating your extremely drunk self and even dropping you back at your dorms safely. He had mentioned how he finally mustered up the courage to stand up against his fathers, that he wanted to do something else rather than working in the medical field. Even though he had still yet to decided his desired career, Sungchan decided to just follow his intuitions which ended up him taking chemistry as his major and thus landing in the same institution and same class as yours. And not to mention, he was beyond grateful for it.

A month had passed with his arrival, the awkwardness amongst everyone long gone and forgotten. It was as if he never left you. You were never over him, so his all time sweet gestures was making it harder for you to maintain your cold act.

“I happened to attempt making kimbap? But I am not sure if they are edible..” Sungchan trailed off as he hesitantly hands you the small metal box. You almost laughed at how cute but messy they looked, his failed attempt at giving the rolls eyes and lips with sesame seeds and ketchup was beyond adorable. You took the box from his grasp, a smile playing on your face as you looked at him. Sungchan upon noticing your grin, rubbed the nap of his neck shyly, his ears and cheeks mirror the shade the of the ketchup. You took a bite from one of the many rolls he made, a hum of satisfaction escaping your lips as you relished the tangy sweet taste. It was perfect, just how you preferred it.

“It’s pretty good.” You licked the stain of ketchup from your fingers, failing to notice how the male blushed harder at your subtle act. “We have Mr.Lee’s class, so I believe we should hurry up before it’s too late.”

On the night of the annual university carnival, Sungchan confessed to you. At least not in front of a public washroom this time. With the constant aid of Jeno and Jaemin, Sungchan was able to plan out a pretty dramatic confession for you. You were completely surprised when Jaemin called you out of nowhere, frantically asking for your presence to a specific classroom. You feared if the dork had committed some sort of treason explaining how dramatic he sounded, so you rushed without giving any second thoughts. However, when you saw the trail of roses with candles adorning the edges, you froze. It had the same scent both you and Sungchan had invented; the sweet scent of lily with tinges of tangerine to it.

A flustered looking Sungchan steps out from the dark, his hands rest behind his back as you cautiously scanned your face. When he saw no signs of discomfort, Sungchan slowly jogged to where you stood, his hands holding a bouquet of lilies with a small note on top of it.

“I know I have made tons of mistakes, hurt you so many times. But I still want to test my luck.” Sungchan got down on his knees, holding the bouquet with his head hanging low. “Y/L/N, will you allow me to be your man? Will you be my girlfriend?”

A shit eating grin spread on your face, slightly giggling at how adorable he looked. “I thought you’d never ask.” You took the flowers, a soft smile adorning your lips as you lock eyes with an extremely surprised Sungchan. “Of course Sungchan.”

“Of course? For real?” Sungchan couldn’t believe what just happened, he was half expecting you to flat out reject him at how inconsiderate he had been. But you accepted his apology, accepted his love. Sungchan stood up, his heart squeezing in delight and adoration for you. He cupped your face gently, as if you were a porcelain doll that would just break if not handled carefully. You saw how his eyes shone with love, sparkling brightly on the soft light from the lighted candles and you swore you never felt so much before for anyone else as much as you felt for him. Sungchan closed the proximity, his nose slight touching yours as he rested his forehead against yours, the smiling never for once leaving his face.

The tension was building up with each passing second, the sounds of your heavy breathing being the only silence breaker. You got impatient, the feeling of his lush lips got you being greedy as you closed the distance standing on your tip-toes, momentarily catching him off the grid before receiving the same attention back. You gripped on his shirt, too unbothered to break the kiss despite losing your breath. He paused for a moment, panting before pulling you back under his spell. The bottled feelings and emotions of longing and pining for each other were poured into the this sweet shared moment of yours. You were grateful that the whole building had no signs of any lurking students and professors, what was supposed to be a innocent make-up kiss soon transformed into a heated one as he held you by your waist, pinning you against the wall with his lips still attached to yours.

You pulled back for the heavy make-out session, almost earning a whine from the male before you soothed him with you words that came next. “I love you.”

Sungchan felt his already beating heart pick up its pace, becoming hastier that he was low-key afraid if he might face a stroke anytime. With a loving grin, he looked back at you who was still caged in his arms. He tucked the stray of hair brushing across the sides of your face from the soft breeze entering the windows, the illuminating yellow hues from the candles making you look like a dream. A dream that seemed unattainable to him until this very moment.

“I love you so so much. Thank you. Thank you for giving me a chance to prove myself, to allow me to show you my feelings, Y/N.” He was breathless, he felt so many emotions at that moment when you glanced at him loving. He was afraid his pulse might stop any moment, so he kissed you back, but now filled with passion and desire. And let’s just say, one of your fantasies were fulfilled that night.

The news of his grandma passing away came after a few months when you both had officially started dating. Both the Jungs were extremely close to her, so when Jaehyun took her back to Myeongsu Hospital where he was currently the chief of neurology, her condition was inevitable. Jaehyun hoped that maybe she might get to spend more time on earth under his care, but he too was victim in the cruel hands of destiny. Sungchan rushed to your dorm, bloodshot eyes as he told you the news. You found yourself sobbing alongside him, tenderly keeping him embraced in your warmth as you shared his pain. You knew her personally as well, all the moments spent with her were a profound favorite part of teen years.

“I wanted to meet you before I leave for Seoul. I came to say a goodbye.” Sungchan sniffed, his hands wiping away the streams of water rolling down your face. You smiled at his concern, mimicking his actions you brushed his sweaty bangs away from his forehead before placing a soft peck against it.

“It’s okay. Don’t tell me goodbyes anymore...for I know you’ll always come back to me.”

Epilogue

Sungchan fumbled with his tie nervously, bile reaching up his throat as the worst scenarios flooded his brains. His eyes frantically looked around for help, making a bow-tie was just not his cup of his. A breath of relief escapes his lips when his eyes landed on his closest beloved friend Jeno. Jeno stood leaning against the door frame, an amused grin painting his sharp features as he walked to the struggling male.

“Bro...” Sungchan huffed pleadingly, a pout forming his eyes.

“Yes bro.” Jeno flashed him an eye roll, before having the same eye smile again as he fixed his friend’s tie. After all, it was a big event for him.

To say the least, you looked breathtaking in your white laced gown. The simplicity of the dress made you look more elegant, it enhanced your natural beauty and Sungchan couldn’t just tear his eyes away from your form. It was supposed to be the bride’s day, but to him you shone the brightest.

“You know it’s me getting married, but the new comers might assume it’s you considering how you are gaping at y/n shamelessly.” Jaehyun hissed to his best man, earning a scoff from Sungchan.

“Hyung, let me have my moment! Please.” Sungchan whined but was careful to tone it down, only to receive a slight nudge from the groom who chuckled at his antics.

The wedding was glamorous, elegant, anything that could be named as a dream wedding. Sungchan remained glued beside you the whole night, a proud grin on his face every time he was asked about the lady whose arms laid locked with his. With a smug look, he would rub on their faces that you were his girlfriend, especially exaggerating to the males who seemed to had their eyes on you. You both enjoyed the silent company of each other, the soothing sounds of the wind replacing the absence of music as Sungchan drove you back to your place, hands still intertwined. When he came in front of your shared apartment, he fidgeted in his seat nervously; fishing out something from his coat.

You figured it was another one of his endless gifts, so you just smiled with your back resting against the cushion seat of the car.

“Sungchan, you really need to-”

A throat seering stopped you in the midst of speaking, your eyes widening when you realized what the purple velvet box might contain. Sungchan let out breaths of nervousness, blowing out some air out of his lungs to lessen the feeling of anxiety as he looked at you, eyes as genuine as ever.

“Y/N, I don’t believe in fancy proposals as you know. It is an intimate moment for us so I want it to happen in the presence of only us.” Sungchan stuttered in the middle as he opened the box, revealing an extremely gorgeous but simple plated band with a small stone adorning the top perfectly.

“So will you marry me?”

You stared at the male dumbfounded. Your eyes refused to believe the scene in front of you, hearts doing numerous flips and turns and it was just hard to explain all the feelings you were feeling. Sungchan had always been the one for you, and even though not everyone gets to have a happy ending with their first love, you were beyond grateful that you had happened to fall in the rare probability.

“I...OF COURSE. OF COURSE I WILL.” You yelped in delight, shoving your hand in front of his face as he just laughed while placing the ring on your finger. It fit perfectly. You grabbed him by the collar and kissed him with your overpowering passion and love, not realizing how if continued any longer, you guys might have to pay a fine for parking on the wrong side. So without wasting any time further, you both hauled yourselves to your apartment, refusing to break the contact of your lips molded perfectly together on your way. In short, let’s just say ‘sweet innocent kiss transformed into a heated one’ yet again.

I went completely overboard with this. I am so sorry if it didn’t turn up as you had expected it to, and honestly I am not completely pleased with it either. I felt like it could’ve been better in terms of expressing emotions. However, improvement is a never ending proccess and im still learning. SO TO WHOEVER WHO HAPPENED TO MAKE THIS TILL HERE. I LOVE YOU SODIJMS YOU DONT KNOW HOW MUCH IT MEANS TO ME.

Feedbacks and criticisms are always appreciated! Please care to leave them as it may help me potentially grow as a writer. Thank you for sparing your time to read my piece of work.

with love,

Hana.

171 notes · View notes

miki-snake · 3 years

Text

loading... The Other Brother

character selected: Osamu

played for: 2.8k words

A/N: So, this is my piece for the HQHQ SFW Collab, check out the work of all the other amazing writers and with that, I hope you enjoy it!

It was planned to be a nice family dinner at Onigiri Miya. The restaurant was closed earlier that day so you and Osamu had enough time to prepare everything before the rest of the family would arrive. His parents, Atsumu, you, and Osamu, just a little get-together to catch up on everyone. It was a light mood at the dinner table, Atsumu was cracking jokes and his mother scolded him for his terrible table manners, while Osamu and his dad talked about the great development of his restaurant.

His family, especially his father, were surely proud of Osamu to take the risk and reach for his dream. Since the beginning, they were all supportive of his decision to open up Onigiri Miya and you couldn’t be more happy and proud to be a part of this journey.

You and Osamu were staying strong since the last year of high school when Osamu finally had the courage to come up to you with a homemade bento and the question if you’d like to be his girlfriend that he delivered with a light stutter and blushing cheeks. Of course, you said yes, you had a crush on the grey-haired Miya twin for over a year and everyone around you could feel the mutual, but oblivious pining the two of you had after each other.

So when he asked you out you were ecstatic to finally call him yours.

From then on, you two were an unmatched team. After high school, you followed your dreams while he continued down the road of being a chef in his own restaurant.

You were right at his side whenever he needed you, at his brightest moments but also when he was close to falling apart.

As the night went on, the attention shifted over to Atsumu and his current life. He was part of Japan’s Olympic team and he just continued to gain prominence by other athletes and sports fans but especially by his female fans. Wherever he went it was like a hoard of ladies followed him and it was really scary to see how few boundaries these women knew.

“You know Atsumu, if you’d stop going to the club every weekend, you might be able to use your free time to meet a proper woman out there.” That was what his mother would tell him almost every time they’d see each other. Somehow she was worried that Atsumu wouldn’t find the right person and well, you always had to laugh when the topic comes up. He’d get flustered and tries to change the topic but ultimately he’d fail.

Miss Miya turned over to face you with a bright smile on her face.

“I’m really happy that Osamu got you by his side y/n.”

Her eyes were shining with pride and you were sure that you had the same look on your face because you were proud to be Osamu’s girlfriend. You were proud of what he has achieved and how far you two have come.

You loved him and there was never a day when you doubt your decision to be with him.

“Yeah y/n, you’re a really good girlfriend for Osamu. If only I hadn’t pushed him to confess to you and asked you out myself.” Atsumu topped his words with a smirk and a wink but you knew that was all show to tease you. You and Atsumu had always been great friends, he was the goofball in the group and every time you’d have a good laugh with him. This situation was no different from the rest, so you just laughed about his comment, shaking your head no when he jokingly offered that it wasn’t too late to choose the “obviously better” twin. It was all taken with lighthearted laughter and you shoot back at him that you already were with the better twin.

And for you, it was simple as that, not that you could really compare the two twins like that but to you, it had always been only Osamu.

It was a great night with the people that you adored, which is why you don’t know how only two days after the meeting, you ended up on the couch in your apartment, feeling like you’d fall right off the earth.

“What did you just say?” You heard him perfectly fine but the words didn’t register in your brain. The shock was written all over your face, as your body reacted before your mind really knew what was going on.

“I said that I wanted us to break up.” Osamu’s face was wiped from any emotion, his voice strong and stern but you’ve been with him way too long to not hear the slight hesitance in his words.

You frowned at him and wondered where this was coming from.

You were already at home, the apartment that you and Osamu shared, waiting for him as you mindlessly scrolled through your phone. When you heard the familiar sound of keys jingling and the door opening with a creak, you got up to greet him. Right at the sight of him, you knew something was up, though you just assumed it was something at work. With a tug on his arm, you directed him to the couch where you sat down but he just stood there as if he was ready to turn around and leave again.

I want us to break up.

He really said that but your mind couldn’t wrap around his words. It felt like your body was burning from the inside, you wanted to scream or to punch something.

“Why?” In the end, it was all you could get out. Your voice sharp as a knife and if only you knew… if only you knew how it pierced through Osamu’s heart. Though what would it change if you knew, it wasn’t as if he didn’t just shatter yours.

“Do I have to give you a reason? It’s not like I’d need you to accept that this is over.” His words were harsh, maybe even harsher than he intended. But in his mind it was the right thing to do, in his mind his hurt was much more than yours. That’s what you don’t know though, but what you knew was that you were enraged by his words.

Your breathing picked up, nails digging holes into your palms as you stared at him with eyes full of disbelieve and anger.

“Do you have to give me a reason? If you are really that slow then yes, yes you have to give me a reason Osamu. I have every right to know why you want to end things out of nowhere.”

“I’m not asking you y/n, I am telling you that we’re done.” He seemed to get annoyed and his voice picked up in volume but you won’t back down.

“Too bad Osamu, because it’s always two in a relationship and I am the second person in this one. So, I ask you again, why do you want to break up.”

“I don’t have to tell you.”

“Stop being childish!” You were beyond frustrated. He really thought he could get away with it by just telling you that you two were done? This wasn’t just a fling or a summer flirt, you two have been together for years and you won’t give up until he told you the truth. You knew him like no other and it was clear to you, in the way that he acted towards you that he was trying to hide something.

And yes, Osamu just wanted to run away and not look back but he was rooted right in front of you just by the unforgiving look you gave him.

“Oh, now I’m childish? What else am I huh? Tell me y/n, what else bothers you.”

“What are you talking about? ‘Samu this has nothing to do with what bothers me because it is you that wants to break up with me!”

“Everything has to do with you y/n!” He yelled at you, his chest heaving as he struggled to control his breathing. He was prepared for you to yell back at him but all you did was look at him confused while you patiently waited for him to continue.

You knew there was more to it and you wouldn’t let him rest until you got to the very bottom of it.

“Tell me y/n, what would you have done if Atsumu would’ve been the one who confessed to you.” You really didn’t expect this conversation to turn that way.

“Why are you asking that? I don’t know, it didn’t happen.”

“But what if?”

“What do you mean what if? It didn’t happen, so why does it matter when the situation never occurred?”

“It matters because now you’re with me.” He sounded exasperated, but to you, it was just ridiculous. Osamu was never one to worry about the past, always looking forward to achieving his dreams, so seeing him like this was… it was challenging.

“Yes, I am with you. I am with you and I wouldn’t-“

“You’re with the other brother y/n, okay? That’s all I am right? Atsumu the shining sun and then there’s the other brother.”

His words shocked you.

Never in the entire time of your relationship did he talk about that. He looked so vulnerable, so desperate and it hurt you to see him like that. The two of you had a lot of up and downs, many fights and disagreements but in the end, you always talked it out. When something was bothering him, he never hesitated to talk to you about it, so hearing this for the first time makes you wonder how long he’s felt that way.

You never wanted him to feel like he couldn’t come to you and you never thought you did. But no matter how worried you were, his next words hit you square in the face.

“If Atsumu would’ve asked you back then, you probably wouldn’t be here.”

When did you give him the impression that it was Atsumu that you loved? Sure, he played a big role in your life. He was one of your closest friends and the brother of the man you loved. He was the brother of the man you loved but not the man you loved.

“When… when did you feel like I loved him and not you?”

“I’m not blind, everyone can see the way you two smile at each other. You laugh at everything he says and your eyes are basically glued to him y/n.”

“He makes me smile because we’re friends, but I’m not in love with the first person that I smile at.” You tried to reason with him but it didn’t seem like he’s listening to you. It was frustrating because what did he wanted to hear from you? You tell him every day how much you loved him, you’re always right by his side and you’ve always supported him so what is it that he wants?

“Don’t think I am dumb y/n. I am just a placeholder for you.”

Now that struck a nerve.

You know that his words were coming from a place of insecurities but that didn’t mean he could just say things without having to take the consequences.

“A placeholder? Do you really think that lowly of me ‘Samu?” A bitter laugh escaped your lips, your eyes burning from the tears that started to well up. Never, from the day that you’ve met him, did you think he’d say something like that. Your heart was burning, lungs struggling to keep a steady breath. It was insane, everything must’ve turned upside down because this

“So you think I am just a shallow person, using you so I could eventually get to Atsumu?” Your voice was getting louder with every word, your anger winning over the bone crushing hurt that you felt.

“I tell you what Osamu, if I would’ve wanted to be with Atsumu I could’ve gotten there without playing around with you.” He flinched at your words and you know that you’ve hurt him, but you didn’t care. He started this so he has to be ready to take your words

“You don’t understand it y/n. You know what, I can’t even blame you because everyone loves Atsumu. He’s the golden boy, the rising athlete, the older brother that I’ve, even if we’re only a few minutes apart, looked up to.

No matter where we went people always looked at him, smiled at him and wanted him.” You could see the tears in his eyes, the way his voice trembles and he bit on his lip to hold himself back. “They always chose him. I mean, I also chose him, I followed him around, did whatever he did but now our paths are changing and in the end, people still choose him first.” All this time he was avoiding your gaze, looked behind you at the wall but now his eyes were piercing right through your heart. The man in front of you, the one that you loved so dearly, he was broken into pieces.

“But when will I be someone’s first choice? Tell me, when?” It was one thing that he was questioning your love for him but for him to feel like no one would choose him? It broke you just as much because he no matter what he’d said, you loved him.

You stepped closer to him, until you were nearly chest to chest. The warmth of his body was seeping through your skin and you desperately wanted to take him into your arms, but you couldn’t. You placed your right hand on his chest and you could feel how fast his heart was beating and somehow, in a familiar way you feel as if it synced with yours.

“I don’t think you can ever really understand how much I love you. Because no matter how many times I tell you that I love you or what it is that I love about you, I know that in the back of your mind you will always question it.

And I’m not going to lie, it hurts. It hurts knowing that no matter what I do, you will never let loose of those insecurities.” Tears were now streaming freely down your cheeks. You couldn’t hold back anymore.

“But even then I will never stop to tell you how much I adore you. ‘Cause, what I feel for you is nothing but unconditional love. Do you know why it’s unconditional? Because I don’t expect anything in return. I don’t expect you to love me back or to do something to prove yourself. It’s unconditional because no matter what you’d give me and what not, I’d still love you. I would lie if I’d told you that I wouldn’t want to hear “I love you” from you. Though if you say it or not won’t change the way I feel for you. ”

His tears were trickling down his face and right onto you, both of you crying, not in each others arms but so close.

“You got me hooked on you, the moment you walked through that door with that gorgeous and calm smile on your face. I knew there was no way back for me and no other respond than yes when you asked me out.“ And through the tears you still managed to smile, you smiled because of him.

“But loving you unconditionally also means that I have to respect your decision to back out of this relationship. I’m not giving up on us without fighting, because 'Samu, I fought. I fought for us, bled and cried countless nights, hoping that this could work out whenever we had a fight.“

“I was- am ready to love you and help you to love yourself but I can’t help someone who doesn’t want me. It hurts that I couldn’t give you what you wanted, what you so desperately needed. I hope that one day you’ll find that person who’ll give you that breathtaking feeling you gave me. Someone, who can make you feel loved because that’s what you deserve Osamu. You deserve to be someone’s first choice.”

Of course you weren’t giving up, but you were waiting. You would give him his chance to think and gather his thoughts but for now you needed to step back and that’s what you did.

With that, you stood up and gathered your belongings in your bag. You got ready to walk out of the door, walk out of his life. As always you wore your heart on your sleeve, you told him what you felt and not it was his time to decide. What was his first choice?

His pride and insecurities or you?

Paralyzed by his feelings and mind still pondering about your words, he just sat there staring into the blurry world. You chose him and he decided to end it. He knew that you’ be there waiting but not forever and so now it was his time to choose.

#osamu x reader #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu angst #haikyuu!!#haikyuu osamu #HQHQ collab

123 notes · View notes