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greenglowinspooks · 6 months

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(DCxDP) The obligations of a rogue versus those of a parent (Pt. 4)

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Tw: descriptions of body horror, Dr. Crane has PTSD and Does Not Realize, Crane has an actual panic attack and just doesn’t care, the Riddler makes one (1) sex joke about Batman

Will be crossposted to AO3 eventually

(Pt. 1 here) (Prev here) - (Pt. 5 here)

(Masterlist here)

—

Dr. Jonathan Crane is in his lab, the acrid scent of chemicals filling the air, and his hands are shaking.

Danny’s health, for the first week that he had him, had been steadily improving at an extremely quick rate. However, his healing had begun to stagnate. Danny said that it was because his body had run out of ectoplasm, and that while there was a lot of ambient ectoplasm in Gotham, he needed a stronger type in order to heal.

And so, that led Dr. Crane here.

He had stolen the research notes from the Penguin years ago regarding his experimentation on him.

(He quite vividly remembers the sound of bone creaking and groaning as it twisted, lengthened. The squelching of shifting tendons and muscles, the strange fabric-like tightening of skin. The feeling of going from man to monster, of losing all claim to his humanity.)

Danny had called him Liminal, part ghost. He had said that he was transformed by, among other things, a kind of synthetic ectoplasm.

Danny needed ectoplasm.

Crane had the research notes. He had every ingredient necessary. And yet, attempt after attempt failed.

The chemical smell burns his nose. His hands tremble.

Dr. Crane is not afraid.

He doesn’t feel fear anymore. He’s tried to, many, many times, but nothing has worked. And yet, his hands are shaking still.

(The horrifying sensation of vertebrae pop-pop-popping along his spine, growing and lengthening. The unbearable itching beneath his skin as toxin glands begin to form. The feeling of his teeth sharpening and elongating, of his skull growing, of his vision changing and brightening. The awful stench of chemicals. The awful stench of ectoplasm.)

Jonathan takes careful note of his shaking hands, his blurring vision, his accelerated heart-rate and shallow breathing.

(Human hands. Human vision. Human heart and lungs and organs.)

He takes note of them, but he does not let that distract him from the task at hand. Danny is not a chemist, but Jonathan is.

The boy knows enough about chemistry in theory, but he won’t go anywhere near Crane’s equipment. He seems to have some sort of intense fear of laboratory settings, probably developed during his stay with the GiW, and Crane is willing to respect that, if only because he cannot afford to lose him.

As such, Crane is the only one qualified to do this. And, unfortunately, if he isn’t successful the boy may very well die.

He heats the chemicals to precisely the right temperatures, adding each one to its correct container.

Dr. Crane thinks of the Scarebeast, that creature born of cruelty and greed and a sense of superiority. That creature which he tries to ignore is a part of him, that can never be removed. A damage which cannot be undone.

He pours the contents of a small beaker into a larger flask, watching the liquids swirl together. The stench in the air is becoming closer and closer to the one burned into his memory.

Crane’s whole body is wracked with unpleasant sensations. It’s truly unfortunate, he thinks, that despite his mind’s lack of fear, his body still reacts so harshly.

Jonathan’s eyes wander, eventually settling on a purple and green card sitting innocently on the corner of the table.

Right.

Even if they wiped out the GiW tomorrow, and even if Danny could survive without ectoplasm, he would still be in danger.

Crane has to get him back to good health. It’s the only way he can be sure that the boy can defend himself properly.

The solution in the flask begins to foam, and Jonathan does not hesitate as he adds the final ingredient. He pours the mixture into a new container, capping it and placing it into a freezer set to -40 degrees.

Hopefully this time he got the timing right.

Jonathan tries to relax, the ventilation in the room slowly but surely clearing the familiar smell from the air.

He thinks of the letter.

Surely, he thinks, that man can come up with some better material for his jokes. Or, at least something new.

Same old threats, same old attempted poisoning.

Aiming his threats at Danny, though, that was new. New and utterly unacceptable.

Scarecrow did what he had to.

He doubted that his solution would last forever, of course, as with that man it never did. As such, he would prepare both himself and Danny for the inevitable moment that his choices came back to bite them.

However, for the moment, they were safe. Danny could rest and recover, and Jonathan could figure out a plan to minimize possible damages.

Jonathan is no longer shaking.

He’s exhausted. This is his fifth attempt today, and each one leaves an unfortunate strain on his mind and body.

With a sigh, he settles himself into his seat at a nearby desk, opening up his computer and logging his most recent attempt. He still has to wait for it to chill to know if it was successful, but he can always update the logs later.

Once he’s done, he stretches, joints popping loudly as he walks to the freezer.

When he sees the results of his tireless work, the ghost of a smile flits across his face.

Success.

Jonathan picks up the jug of ectoplasm and leaves the lab, which is in all actuality the basement of the new apartment that he moved himself and Danny into after receiving the note. The scrappy old woman who was his landlord had told him that as long as he paid her five hundred dollars up front, she would let him set up in the basement without any questions or cop calls.

And so, the most expensive apartment in the Narrows was his.

At least, he thought, the distance between the basement and the apartment was short enough that Danny didn’t have to sit in while he was doing his labwork.

Jonathan knew that he didn’t exactly have a strong grasp on the concept of ‘lab safety,’ proven by his built-up immunity to almost every toxic chemical he’d ever encountered, and he doubted that Danny should be around such an environment.

He was back to the apartment quickly, not bothering to hide the self-satisfied smile on his face. Danny is sitting in his armchair, trying to read one of his books. Danny looks up, ready to greet him, when he sees the jug in his hands and pauses.

“Is that..?”

“Synthetic ectoplasm,” Jonathan says proudly, “I found the Penguin’s research notes and decided to recreate it, since you said that you needed it to heal properly. I’m not sure if it’ll work the same as what you usually have, but I hope it’s helpful all the same.”

Danny is standing, now, and looking at Jonathan with a strange look in his eyes. He looks, Jon thinks, like he’s about to cry.

Then Danny is rushing forward and wrapping his arms around Jonathan, his scrawny form shaking.

Jonathan is, for a moment, horrified. Did he do something wrong somehow? Why is this child, who’s so afraid of touch, hugging him?

And then he hears Danny’s voice, and he knows that it was all worth it.

“Thank you,” he’s mumbling, over and over, “thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you so much.”

“Of course,” Jonathan says softly, because what else can he say?

The boy cries in his arms for a while, and Jonathan briefly wonders what his life must have been like before, if a person like him can be seen as a comforting figure.

Then, Danny pours himself a small glass of the synthetic ectoplasm, putting the rest into the small fridge which had come with the apartment, and he settles back down, sitting in the armchair once again.

Jonathan sits opposite of him, and they chat with one another as Danny drinks.

Danny talks to him about the stars and tells him about different spaceships, and Jonathan makes sure to pay attention and ask the boy questions.

He doesn’t miss the way that Danny lights up every time he asks him something about his interests. He’s so passionate, so smart, a trait that he seldom sees outside of his fellow rogues, and Jonathan wants to encourage that.

It’s…nice. Peaceful, almost.

And then the front door flies open, because Jonathan isn’t allowed to have nice things.

“Jon,” a familiar voice rings out, “what the hell?!”

Danny is frozen in place, clearly terrified.

Jonathan heaves a sigh, turning to face the nuisance who’s entered his apartment.

“Eddie,” he drawls, “to what do I owe the pleasure?”

Edward’s face is red with anger as he invades Jonathan’s apartment.

“Oh, I don’t know! Maybe it’s the fact that you sent a bunch of rogues a cryptic message and then dropped off the face of the earth for two weeks! I was worried, Jon!”

Jonathan hums in acknowledgement.

“I didn’t think it was that cryptic,” he says, picking up a book in order to pointedly ignore the Riddler.

“Oh, of course you didn’t, you straw-stuffed hickory dickory dickhead. I swear, you’re always—” he pauses, finally having noticed Danny sitting opposite of Jonathan, “—who is this?”

“My apprentice,” Jonathan replies, dreading the upcoming headache he was no doubt going to develop from Edward’s company, “he’s helping me hunt down the GiW. His name is Danny.”

Edward gasps dramatically.

“You—an apprentice?! And you’re letting him sit in the old man chair?! You don’t even let me sit in the old man chair,” he wails, draping himself over the headrest of the couch with a flourish, “Jonathan, I thought I knew you!”

“Edward,” Jonathan says, “get out of my apartment.”

“Oh my goodness, this is incredible. You’re becoming the bat!”

“I am not becoming the bat, Eddie, now get out.”

Edward has a shit-eating grin on his face as he waltzes over to Danny. Danny, who seemed terrified when he first appeared, is now looking at him with obvious amusement written all over his face.

“I mean, look at him! The hair, the eyes, the scrappy build. If you put him in one of those traffic light vigilante costumes, he could easily pass as a Robin!”

“I’m not doing this with you today, Eddie.”

“Riddle me this, Jon: I am a treasure hidden inside of a chest. You can break me, or steal me, or give me a rest. I can flutter, or pound, or attack, or drop, but if you don’t have me, you’re certainly fucked. What am I?”

Jonathan pauses for a moment before he groans, dropping his head into his hands.

“Eddie.”

Danny sits still, a confused look on his face as he repeats the riddle silently. Then, his face lights up in delight.

“A heart!”

“Jon, I like this one,” Edward says with a smile, ruffling Danny’s hair, “you are correct! A heart, something that I wasn’t aware that our dear Jonathan had!”

“Eddie, stop.”

“No, no,” Edward says, “I was worried about you, you deserve this. I mean, you even missed girls night! You never miss girls night!”

“Girls night?” Danny asks, absolutely delighted.

“Oh, of course,” Edward says, sprawling over on the couch, dangerously close to just laying in Jonathan’s lap, “we have it once a week. I’m invited because of Selina and Jon’s invited because Harley likes him.”

“And what does girls night entail, exactly?”

“Eddie,” Jonathan groans, “please.”

“Well,” Edward hums, “we usually paint our nails, or watch a movie, or gossip about the other rogues, and occasionally, we tell each other about any ‘encounters’ we have with Batman,” he says, raising his eyebrows up and down.

Danny’s jaw drops.

“Edward, shut up,” Jonathan says, an irritated tone in his voice that wasn’t there before.

“No way,” Danny says, “I thought that Batman, like, hated you guys or something. You mean he actually..?”

“Oh, the Bat is much like a bottle of liquor or a cheap cigarette, in that he was made to be passed around.”

Danny chokes on air.

“Edward Nygma,” Jonathan hisses, getting out of his seat and looming over the man, “get the hell out.”

Edward pales.

“Leaving, leaving!” Edward says, dashing away from Jonathan. He pauses, turning to flash Danny a quick smile.

“Remember Danny, I’m your favorite uncle! Not any of the other rogues, me!”

With that, he leaves, the room falling completely silent.

And, as per usual, that silence does not last.

“You full-named him?” Danny asks gleefully, “and it worked?”

Jonathan just sighs, sitting down on the couch and rubbing at his temples.

“Please, don’t take anything Eddie says seriously. He’s a moron.”

“Dr. Crane, please let me come to girls night with you,” Danny pleads, his eyes sparkling, “I promise I won’t embarrass you.”

Jonathan groans.

“Of course you won’t, Eddie will do it for you.”

“Come on, please?”

“I think we’re a bit busy with the GiW at the moment,” Jonathan snaps. He pauses as he notices the crestfallen expression on Danny’s face.

This boy is going to be the death of him.

“Perhaps, though, when all that is taken care of…”

Danny cheers, grinning wildly, and Jonathan is not at all relieved to see him happy again. Certainly not.

The rest of the day is relatively normal.

Danny works on trying to get information from the GiW database while Crane refines his his fear toxin, both preparing for a raid on the GiW base they located in Gotham.

It was only a temporary base, nothing of note, but there was a chance of discovering more bases through it, and that wasn’t something either of them were willing to give up.

Still, something like this would take time. Rushing would only lead to failure.

…

Late in the night, long after Danny is fast asleep in his room, Jonathan pauses.

The GiW are not the only threat out there. They aren’t the only threat to him or to Danny. Perhaps it could be helpful to reach out to someone with greater resources than himself.

He sends a quick message to Red Hood.

Hopefully, he thinks, everything will go smoothly.

—

#dcxdp #dc x dp #dp x dc #dpxdc #dp x dc crossover #dc x dp fic #liminal scarecrow #Jon’s PTSD is triggered by the smell of ectoplasm because his life is a nightmare #HDJFNDNDNFKDJF #I am the master of emotional whiplash #rip Jon just trying to have some peace in this fucking house #never gonna happen king 🫡#oh also Eddie is not lying that bat can manwhore #and like half the rogues in Gotham know this from experience #and also most of the JL #and some of JL dark #btw Eddie and Jon are besties #they’re both awful but they make it work #when Jon full-names Eddie that just means that if he doesn’t stop whatever he’s doing he’s gonna get a dose of fear toxin #Eddie isn’t intimidating enough to full-name anyone so if he gets mad he just bashes whoever in the head with his cane #Jon is the living embodiment of ‘me and my girl don’t argue she bash me in the head with a rock and I walk it off like a man’#also side note I’m not doing any ships in this #because I don’t want to #they are just Like That #if you wanna read it that way though it’s completely fine #also shoutout 2 that one scriddler fic on ao3 that helped inspire that riddle LMAO

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uncanny-tranny · 7 months

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I think it would really benefit people to internalize that mental illnesses are often chronic and not acute. Some of us will never be able to jump the hurdle of managing illness, much less sustaining a sense of normalcy. Many of us will never "recover," will never manage symptoms, will never even come close to appearing normal - and this is for any condition, even the ones labeled as "simple" disorders or "easy-to-manage" disorders.

It isn't a failure if you cannot manage your symptoms. It isn't a moral failure, and you aren't an awful person. You are human. There's only so much you can do before recognizing that you cannot lift the world. Give yourself the space to be ill because, functionally, you are.

#mental health #mental health advocacy #like... anxiety and depression are often concieved of as simple and easy to manage...#...but that isn't the case for so many of us. anxiety and depression just have a lot more research invested into them...#...and while i wish this were the case for literally every other condition it does alter people's perception of you to some extent...#...so while this is NOT solely about anxiety or depression it includes us...#...my anxiety and depression and PTSD have *destroyed* my life. this is chronic and will probably be life-long...#...and that isn't my fault. i've done the fucking work but guess what? that doesn't account for the fact that I Am Just ILL #the least we can do for each other is to be compassionate #be compassionate to those who cannot heal. be compassionate to the people who can't manage their lives. this world is scary enough #recognize that management of symptoms is something not all of us can do - even IF their condition is labeled as 'easy to manage'#i allowed myself to feel angry that i can't heal 'normally' and that was unfair as fuck toward myself #and i NEED people to internalize this so that MAYBE this could help somebody else who is where i was #i NEED them to understand that it's okay that they are where they are - sometimes shit just doesn't turn out how you expect or want #don't beat yourself over you being a person. you are struggling enough. you deserve to rest. just rest please #and just... give yourself space

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moonlit-positivity · 11 days

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You don't need everyone to like you. I understand this can be an overwhelming trauma response to being neglected and otherwise hurt as a kid without the comfort and reassurance of our parents. But please try to remember that your worth is not dependent on how many people can love you. You have something much more important and worth protecting-- your heart and soul and mind and spirit. Not everyone you meet in this world is gonna resonate and vibe with you on those same levels. You've got to get comfortable with the concept of being misunderstood or feeling out of place-- and, rather than fawn to fit in, take that as a sign to find the spaces and people who can better appreciate you for it.

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gros-chat-fait · 4 months

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Just six normal teens hanging out in the woods. --

100th post and final drawing of the year. Happy holidays and new year, everyone <3!

#animorphs #just some normal teens who don't have ptsd or have ever killed or lost a family member to an alien invasive army #me: i'm gonna put everyone in shoes so i don't have to draw feet #also me: anyway here's human!ax and it wouldn't make sense for him to wear shoes here...... oh #they said ax lived in a shack in the woods right? anyway my headcanon is they found this bushcraft shelter and commandeered it #been practicing backgrounds because i wanna start working on a graphic novel next year #so this style might pop up more from now on #less characters floating in white voids yay #art du chat

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wibble-wobbegong · 2 years

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will byers literally went to hell, redecorated it, came back to life, got possessed, and his biggest problem is some guy named Mike

#bro stand up PLEASE #HE’S SO FAR GONE DUDE #HE COULD BE HAVING PTSD NIGHTMARES BUT I BET HE’S DREAMING ABOUT HOLDING MIKE’S HAND OR SOME SHIT #coping through the power of being gay and really sad works i GUESS #byler

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horreurscopes · 3 days

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thirty & flirty & thriving / shower drains HATE them

#horreurart #death note #spent an hour slapping some color on this several months old sketch because i really like it but i don't think it's ever getting finished 💀#anyway where's morgan's Mello Is Fine posting. because he is. fine. look at him. he works out #also please note i tried to give mello stubble but i hated it so much i got rid of it. sorry im too much of a lesbian. i'm sure he'd #look properly rugged but i can't pull it off #anyway local hot goth who is aging like milk due to severe substance abuse in his youth + his ethereal elfin boyfriend of confusing gender #because mello is Fine near's hair gets done because in this universe he is not grievously depressed (: it's yaoi so i get to decide the #complex ptsd's been [REDACTED] out of him (it has not)#thanks for coming to my ted talk #meronia #near #mello #near dn #mello dn #mihael keehl #nate river #near death note #mello death note

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aethersea · 6 months

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it is funny though how kids' shows are so so so careful about death, no one's ever killed except MAYYYYBE the big bad, all those random side characters are fine, here have a quick shot of them before we leave just so you know they really did survive that 50-foot drop into a stormy sea,

and meanwhile kids' books nearly all agree that it's not an adventure until it has a body count.

#to be clear I don't mean the heroes killing people #that's frankly a separate question #but bad guys come with collateral damage #even if they're nameless extras who are never described as more than a body in the street #and quite often the friends the hero meets along the way #will not all make it to the end #edit: actually I do also mean the heroes killing people #atla being so so so careful to show random mooks surviving and having the fire nation take prisoners all the time #vs animorphs going 'yeah we kill people. yeah we've got ptsd. what of it'#vs that one vivian vande velde book I read where the protagonist is really really stressed #about creeping up on a mook with a rock to bash him on the head #bc *what if she kills him?* she's just a teenager she doesn't know how brain trauma works she doesn't want to be a killer #to be clear animorphs and this book are on the same page

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mellowwillowy · 8 months

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Yan! Emperor x GN Empress! Reader

CW: General Yandere warnings. Another warning on the second cut.

"𝑯𝒆 𝒘𝒉𝒐 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒐𝒏𝒄𝒆 𝒂 𝒑𝒖𝒑𝒑𝒆𝒕 𝒂𝒔𝒄𝒆𝒏𝒅𝒆𝒅 𝒊𝒏𝒕𝒐 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝑯𝒆𝒂𝒗𝒆𝒏𝒍𝒚 𝑹𝒆𝒂𝒍𝒎 𝒂𝒔 𝒂 𝒑𝒖𝒑𝒑𝒆𝒕𝒆𝒆𝒓."

Yan! Emperor who schemed against the Empress to have her resigned from her position or even better, executed. He wouldn't want this wench to take the position of his love after all.

Yan! Emperor who secured your position as the next Empress. Hm? It didn't matter what your gender was. Whether you were a woman or a man or neither, for as long as you kept up with the facade, no one would ever notice it.

Yan! Emperor who secured a place for you in the palace, he would never allow anyone to drive you out of it even if it was the Empress or his puppeteers.

Yan! Emperor whose love was only reserved for you and you. The image of you on his bed embracing his tired body would always live in his head rent-free.

Yan! Emperor who felt the need to protect you despite your capabilities of protecting yourself. The two of you may be strong but he knew well the two of you were the exact contrasity of each other. He was the Sin while you were the Virtue itself.

Yan! Emperor who would not hesitate to drag the people who insulted or even caused the slightest inconvenience toward you by their broken and twisted limbs.

Yan! Emperor who secretly worshipped you as though you were his God all along. He couldn't care less about the God his puppeteer worshipped.

Yan! Emperor who knew you hated how both of your lives were controlled like a puppet. But even so, he knew you hated how he had to use force to break free from the strings they used to tug on the two of you.

Yan! Emperor who devised a plan to break free of himself first before saving you. Killing every one of the higher-ups who were using him as a puppet figuratively and literally.

"Then do pray forgive but my dear, what would be left of me, of us, if I didn't kill them all?"

Yan! Emperor who knew you had always been trying to break free from their grasp in a virtuous way, you had always been so naive... no matter how red your armories were painted, that little head of yours had always been so naive.

Yan! Emperor who started to cut the strings that were controlling you one by one so that it wasn't that noticeable that he was involved in this. He knew you'd be devastated if you knew they were all killed just to free you.

Yan! Emperor who started to frame the Empress, forging pieces of evidence and crimes that were all pointed to her neck. It took a lot of time and preparation but he was a patient man. A price to pay to have you sitting next to him on the throne.

Yan! Emperor who stole your journal that detailed all the wrongdoings of everyone in the imperial palace. This way, you wouldn't question the credibility of the accusations thrown at them. Ah, where did you put your diary again?

Yan! Emperor who couldn't wait to fit all the missing puzzles into place, executing all his plans into motion while watching everyone fall from their haven. When the Empress had finally lost all her backing and support, he decided to strike her down with a final hit.

Yan! Emperor who made you watch everything unravel from the front row, how rain fell as the Empress cursed him and you while the guards held her in place.

"YOU WILL SUFFER THE SAME FATE AS I DO, UWAAAAAAAAAAHHH"

Yan! Emperor who watched how your grip on the umbrella tightened, tears wetting your cheek along with the raindrops.

"It's finally over, my dearest."

Yan! Emperor who held no remorse for the deceased as he viewed them as nothing but hindrances to the both of you.

"One must never stop oppressing for just a mere slight of a second would give them a chance to bite back."

Yan! Emperor who immediately discharged you from your position as the Grand General and made you his Empress shortly after the mourning phase had passed. The mourning phase was nothing but a joke to him as his body collided with yours, spending his nights with you.

Yan! Emperor who courted you with a show of him displaying his archery skills, piercing all pearls that were thrown at him down. It somehow reminded him how he annihilated everyone that came in his and your way.

Yan! Emperor who was really mad in love with you, someone who suffered the same fate as he did and yet remained true to self, pristine virtue and beaming in radiance. You were the light of his life despite how your white garment slowly reddened into prosperous red adorning your body. You were the Empress and you had to behave like one, strong-willed and swiftly adapt to all the scheming people in the Imperial Palace.

Yan! Emperor who was your first backing and support, right?

Yan! Emperor who loved you and only you. Forever. For eternity.

CW: Yan! Emperor against Reader (because he wanted Reader to be his lover), Reader's death. Angst no comfort (comfort came in the next lives lmfao), Yan! Emperor avenged your death though (mass slaughter of nation)...

Yan! Emperor who was not pleased with how strong-willed you were as an Empress. As much as he respected you as a former Grand General and an Empress, he did not wish for you to not express any kind of romance sparks anymore.

Yan! Emperor who hated how virtuous you were to the point it slowed down the supposed plan. From then on, the Imperial Palace was divided into two sides, your side and his side. Did he finally stop supporting you, you wondered.

Yan! Emperor who knew what you two had gone through and that you were only being considerate to those who were suffering as well. Nonetheless, he also knew what you suggested was also filled in loopholes.

Yan! Emperor who saw you took in someone under your wing, a girl who was brimming with innocence and curiosity, a reminder to him of how you used to be before you were slowly corrupted.

"It seems like they took her in because it reminded them of themselves as well."

Yan! Emperor who watched how you cared for the girl and protected her from anything that would trouble her. As much as he knew how platonic it was, it was undeniable that he was jealous of the attention that girl received.

Yan! Emperor who noticed how things started to crumble down between you and that girl sooner than you did. He noticed how her eyes were now purely brimming in Envy, green matching her eye colors.

Yan! Emperor who knew she wanted what you had. Honor, strength, intelligence, willpower, and spouse. He knew it and he used that against you.

"If only they are no longer the Empress..." He whispered into the girl's ear, "You would be the next Empress..."

Yan! Emperor who despised the idea of people thinking he really loved his current concubine, she was nothing but a pawn to him. Holding her hand alone made him frown in disgust. He wanted to hold you again and not some make-believe of you.

Yan! Emperor who watched everything by the sideline, how that girl started to consume everything you had, honor, support, intelligence but never his heart.

Yan! Emperor who witnessed everything going well just like his plans until it didn't. His heart was sunken.

"One must never stop oppressing for just a mere slight of a second would give them a chance to bite back."

Yan! Emperor who was only away for a month was informed about your death. The overthrow did not go as he expected. It was supposed to only have you exiled but not killed!

Yan! Emperor who went furious immediately, leaving the province he was in to ensure everything was false news. His horse galloped as though it was burnt alive by him, he did not stop despite the hunger and cold he had to face. YOU were his priority.

Yan! Emperor who saw the whole imperial palace was adorned in red instead of white. So it was only false news, right?

"Hao Yuchen, the traitor had finally been overthrown."

Yan! Emperor whose body failed to stand, his mind racing in horror of what he had done. Instead of surrendering to her mercy, you remained persistent as you had always been, charging toward her men instead of her despite your wounded body. The ending was clear, you died due to your wounds and lack of blood.

Yan! Emperor whose golden eyes finally lost its reflection of light, what swirled in it was only grudge and guilt.

Yan! Emperor who wished he could somehow just strangle the girl and himself to death now. That way, he might be able to meet you in Heaven right?

Yan! Emperor who knew he was bound to be sent to hell. He had committed sins in his whole life and was ready to repent for it to meet you in Heaven up there.

"But what if I ascended as a God instead?"

Yan! Emperor who had no choice but to make her the next Empress, rumors circulating around the Imperial Palace as two Empress had been overthrown. Will this girl be overthrown as well?

Yan! Emperor who wondered to himself, would you be angry if he drove this girl who you protected in your last stand to death? If so, he was ready to feel your fury, in fact, he wished he could feel anything from you.

Yan! Emperor who despised the girl that copied everything you did, he loathed the red that was once adorned your body worn by her now.

Yan! Emperor who was a patient man. A price to pay to have her body floating lifeless on a river. Yes, she would be disposed of the moment he deemed her useless to the nation.

Yan! Emperor who tricked her into drinking the poison instead of the elixir of immortality, letting her body fall into the river as her eyes never left the moon.

"... The moon looks beautiful just like them..."

Yan! Emperor who had always been jealous of the girl. He knew she adored you and yet her way of viewing things was distorted into something disturbing.

But who was he to speak like that when he himself was also at fault?

Yan! Emperor who sat by the porch, gazing into the moon while reminiscing the memories he shared with you before drinking the elixir of immortality.

Yan! Emperor who knew there were only 2 people left in the Imperial Palace, him and a nameless young man.

Yan! Emperor who let the young general cut him open with his sword, feeling a little of the pain of what you felt back then. The general pulled out a bottle of concoction from his sleeve,

"This is the real elixir of immortality." He spat as he drank the elixir.

Yan! Emperor who did not shut his eyes close, his eyes never left the moon above him. Were you residing on the moon as a rabbit? Or were you flying freely like a crane?

In the Imperial Palace, the Emperor lay lifeless on the porch, his golden eyes were dead but they never left the moon above him.

"I will... forever... hold you dearly... in my heart..."

To find you again, to see you again, to hold you again.

Even if it took millenniums... even if it meant I had to destroy your life again...

In the river, the girl's body floated lifeless as her eyes never left the moon.

In the forest, the boy's body lay lifeless as butterflies and flowers surrounded him, his eyes never left the moon.

ᴀꜰᴛᴇʀɴᴏᴛᴇꜱ:

The second cut wasn't really necessary to be read but here's a summary. (The fic up there was packed into summary as well but it left lots of confusion and details out so it sounds OFF)

Hao Yuchen - Emperor

Ying Zili - Girl

Ying Qingyuan - Nameless Young Man

Reader's whereabouts remained unknown. (Nb: reader will appear as a crane next time.)

After the reader's death, the Emperor starts to plan the Empress' downfall, tricking her into making the wrong moves and framing her. The Empress was depicted as committing suicide out of the pressure of mistakes she had committed while the truth is that she was tricked into drinking the poison she thought as an elixir of immortality.

The Nameless Young Man was suspected to be either Reader or Empress' underling.

The whole nation was slaughtered by the Emperor which indirectly made him ascend as a God instead.

Empress and Nameless Young Man also ascended as Gods as well. Ps: in the original lore, the Emperor's ego was hurt so he tried to strike down the Empress and turned them into his lover.

Bonus ; Crack

#yandere male #yandere #yandere x reader #yandere scenarios #yandere x you #yandere imagines #male yandere #yandere insert #yandere oc #yandere headcanons #yandere works #yandere writing #reader insert #x reader #oc #x gn reader #XL suffering from PTSD in the corner

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system-of-a-feather · 1 month

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BTW if you think calming corners, sensory rooms, and other forms of dedicated spaces to handling overload, anxiety, or intense emotions in your house is something only for kids - or even worse - only neurodivergent kids, you are largely denying yourself a very helpful resource based on social norms.

Having a space dedicated to being safe and with easy access to things to help lower overstimulation and calm intense internal experiences is something that everyone can benefit from having

Not just kids

Not just neurodivergent kids

Not just neurodivergent adults

Not just mentally ill adults

Everyone - even the hypothetical person with no mental illness or physical disability

There is nothing "immature" about having spaces organized to make your difficult times easier to handle and I think everyone should consider dedicating maybe even just a shelf or corner in their place to having an abundance of self care resources

Self care is not a limited resource and not something that you have to be "bad enough to have"

If you think its a good thing for parents to provide their kids with rooms / spaces dedicated to different ways they can self regulate, then you should agree that if you are also dealing with any levels of difficulty self regulating, that it should be a good idea and good thing to provide yourslef with rooms / spaces dedicated to ways to help you self regulate

Children and adults both have emotions and life experiences that are hard to regulate / handle and both need ways to relax and calm down

Self care, sensory rooms, and coping / calming corners are resources that can help both children and adults with those difficult moments

#alter: fei #alter: riku #as someone who just realized that I don't need an office (ie the socially normal safe space that I used to have)#and instead could just have what all my neurodivergent kids have #and even just young kids have had in their classrooms and theraputic spaces had #and that it worked much better and there was no reason - other than the implications of mental illness and thus social stigma of having one #as to why I didnt just have one #and i am zero percent regretting it this is so much better for my mental health #actuallyautistic #autism #adhd #actuallyneurodivergent #actually neurodivergent #actually did #actuallydid #dissociative identity disorder #ptsd #self care

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idk-bruh-20 · 9 months

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Irondad fic ideas #148

You know those homework assignments where you have to interview someone in your family and then write an essay about their responses? Fic where Peter's class is told to interview their dad / a father figure in their life.

Peter decides to interview Tony. But, he doesn't want his class to accuse him of lying, and he definitely doesn't want Tony to know what the assignment is about.

So for Tony, Peter makes it seem like the assignment is just to interview anyone. Then, he carefully chooses questions to ask that are domestic and personal enough to avoid any mention of superheroes, celebrities, or so on. The few details that do slip through he just leaves out of his final essay.

For the class problem, Peter solves it by referring to Tony in the essay exclusively as "dad"

Unfortunately for Peter, the teacher then announces a part 2 to the assignment. Right after collecting the essays, the teacher says they will now need to bring the people they interviewed to school for their presentations

Peter has pretty much decided to not even mention it to Tony and just say his dad is busy. But then Flash has to open his big mouth.

He accuses Peter of just making his assignment up, loudly reminding the class that he's an orphan. Peter clarifies that this father figure thing is a new development, but now the teacher looks suspicious

Peter is going to have to ask Tony to come to his school. And he's going to have to explain why the class will be full of kids and their fathers

#irondad fic ideas #irondad and spiderson #imagine the assignment is because the class is reading a book with like toxic masculinity themes #so they have to interview the adult men in their lives about it #tony: yeah my own father never wanted me to show emotion and considered it weak. but emotions are important kid #I've been trying really hard not to pass any of that damage onto you #tony when peter reveals the purpose of the assignment: (crying) see kid. emotions #iron dad and spider son #peter parker #tony stark #in the interview tony talks about things like his ptsd and anxiety and his love for his family #peter's class when they realize the person talking about these things was freaking IRON MAN: :O !!!?!¡!!!#peter: my dad's career puts him under a lot of pressure. at home he can be himself but at work he often has to wear a mask :)#tony: u little shit #lmao #queueueueue

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syrupfog · 3 months

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AU where Sanji never actually left Germa, and Judge made him a test subject early on, successfully getting rid of his empathy after years of torture.

But like, he has those years of bullying from his brothers first, and his empathy’s gone but his anger’s still there. Also with no Zeff, he fights with his fists and doesn’t treat women Like That. Because Zeff’s the one who instilled in him to never hit a woman (and made it weird but that’s not the point).

He’s out on some mission in the Grand Line when he runs into the Straw Hats and he sees Zoro’s green hair and associates it with Yonji and he just haaaates him on sight.

The fight is super evenly matched and Zoro manages to knock him out eventually but he’s like what’s the guy’s DEAL. Wtf is his problem.

Maybe Law’s with them when it goes down and he recognizes that costume and fanboys…

Oh actually yeah— Law’s with them! And after Zoro knocks him out, Law goes into Creepy Surgeon Mode and is like for the love of god please let me get my fingers in that chest cavity

And everyone else (bar Robin ofc) is like Σ（ﾟдﾟlll）

But Law gets a room going and finds all sort of odd Germa technology literally implanted in him and starts pulling it out and messing with it and suddenly Sanji wakes UP and he’s— he’s scared. And overwhelmed. He’s in real time having to reckon with years of torturing people.

And Law’s like oh the emotional part of this is not in my pay grade this is not my job anymore and dips.

So Sanji’s there in the Sunny’s infirmary like “I’m a monster I need to be put down oh my god” and Luffy shows up like HEY you’re cool as hell join my crew.

Zoro is not a fan of this option and also it turns out neither is Sanji BUT sanji has nowhere to go so he makes a deal to sail with them until the next habitable island. So Zoro watches him like a hawk bc he’s like “you’re definitely faking this and are gonna turn evil and try to kill people again right”

But instead he just keeps finding Sanji being really pathetic and sad and looking longingly at the kitchen (Robin doubles as the cook and her food is damn near inedible but that’s just the life of a pirate innit)

Late one night Zoro comes off watch and he sees Sanji sneaking into the kitchen and he thinks OH he’s going to try to POISON US so he sneaks in after him and confronts him, swords and all. And Sanji, who knows what an awful person he’s been and knows he deserves death, just starts crying and is like “yeah you can kill me just let me cook one thing once I just want to remember what it feels like”

So Zoro lets him cook, and is like yeah I’m killing you after this, and Sanji spends a long time sniffling as he re-familiarizes himself with pots and pans and spices and knives and ends up making something garlic-y and delicious that smells strong enough to wake up the crew, and everyone traipses in enraptured by the smell. So Sanji serves them and Zoro tries it first because if it’s poisoned he’s not letting EVERYONE go down. But it’s not poisoned and it’s really good, and anyway Zoro can’t kill him now in front of everyone.

But three nights later the same thing happens— he sees Sanji sneaking into the kitchen and follows him and Sanji says “I know you should’ve killed me last time but you couldn’t, I get that, but I’m dangerous. So let me cook just one more time and then you can kill me.”

And it doesn’t happen of course. Everyone comes in and everyone eats and Zoro watches Sanji recover a little of himself.

And so it goes. At first every few nights and then every other night, and then every single night.

And whenever Zoro comes in, Sanji says, I know I deserve to die but let me cook just one more thing.

And at some point Zoro stops thinking about killing Sanji. He’s a part of the crew now. He’s proving himself, and anyway Zoro can beat him and hold him down and Law can reverse whatever it is again if needs be.

So it’s just a thing they do. Zoro lightly threatens him and Sanji begs for his life and they move on. It’s routine but it doesn’t actually MEAN anything anymore.

That is, until one really bad night where Sanji doesn’t show up in the kitchen like he always does, and Zoro goes looking and finally finds him deep in the steerage, and Sanji says, “I can’t keep living like this, please just kill me. I can’t keep living knowing I’m going to die the next day.”

And Zoro’s like ???? You’re not gonna die the next day wtf

And Sanji says, please, just get it over with.

Zoro realizes that Sanji has continued all this time assuming Zoro really is coming to kill him every night

But it’s been MONTHS at this point. Surely he wouldn’t still think—

But Sanji’s wracked with more than a decade’s worth of guilt, is so sure he deserves the worst the world possibly has to offer.

Too bad Zoro’s a little in love with him at this point. And says anyone who wants to kill Sanji will have to go through Zoro first.

Which Sanji DOESNT UNDERSTAND and he doesn’t understand the kiss Zoro follows it up with, but he returns it. Greedily.

Because as much as he knows he deserves death, he also relishes every moment of life, every chance to feel the emotions he wasn’t allowed. And Zoro goes from jailer to protector in his mind. Slowly. Hesitantly.

He spends years working through the trauma, decades really, but the simplicity with which Zoro sees the world helps. Zoro doesn’t blame him. Zoro loves him. Sanji doesn’t know much but he knows he’ll defend this ship that saved him with his life.

And he knows Zoro wouldn’t let Sanji defend HIM with his life, because Zoro views his life as precious and important.

Which is something Sanji is still learning.

He’ll get there.

#zosan #it’s always a toss up what fics to write vs what to just throw out into the void like this #uhhhhh I need a tag for this #would this go in the Zosan fanfic tag I dunno if that’s just for finished fic #my writing #I guess that works #anyway cross posted from twitter since I have like 3 followers lmao #and tbh it’s been a week I’m still thinking about this #(I’m thinking about writing omegaverse Zosan more tho)#(and ptsd law who’s scared of luffy)#(too little time in the world)

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theshitpostcalligrapher · 1 year

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news from the executive dysfunction pit: I have read all of chainsaw man in a single sitting

#sure this is like my ol' high school era's 'dont want to start thing" methodology but i guess it works #my thoughts on the series is a) wow these are well drawn exploded organs and b) ptsd for everyone! time for the high school arc!#chainsaw man

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worstloki · 3 months

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love the idea of the Avengers adding new members but being stingy about rooms so the OG Avengers each get their own but Bucky and Loki are forced to share one under the guise of it being 'healthy interaction'

#Bucky and Loki being friends but in a weird way and now Thor is concerned like 'i don't recognise my brother anymore T-T'#and Steve is grimacing and sighing like 'my chemical romance isn't that bad Thor you just have to acquire the taste'#Bucky and Loki bunking in a room together and people just forgot to give them a second bed but it's ok because they both sleep on the floor #they wake each other up from nightmares and when it's done/conscious they look at each other in slight alarm and just give '👍❓❗' '👍👍❓'#aggressive thumbs up before returning to bed still communicating with thumbs up like 'all good??' 'all good??' 'all good!' 'go sleep?!?'#they both are convinced that oily hair is a way to keep it healthy and dandruff free and like they're not WRONG bc it works for them #but people also hate listening to them corroborate such experiences with each other #like you can't deny their hair is healthy and silky when they wash up and get dressed for something. BUT. STOP TALKING LIKE THAT.#they talk about how the bath they share is so comfortable for two people and it's driving people up a wall #Natasha opens the door and sees Bucky in the dark propped against a wall looking half dead with earphones in #(he is watching a nature documentary Loki recommended)#they bond over times they were being controlled and/or suicidal in Tony's lab and Tony who was working nods along absently long used to it #Tony: ah yeah I have PTSD but im managing it okay for now with meds #Bucky and Loki: *making faces* boo 👎

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ghouljams · 9 months

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We haven’t touched on Cowboy!Ghost’s, well, ghosts before, and I literally couldn’t get this out of my head last night. I’m going to treat this like actual fic, I feel so fancy...

Warnings:

Hurt/Comfort, Graphic depictions of animal death, PTSD, Ghost going through it

Pairing:

Ghost x OC (Goose) [can be read as x reader]

Summary:

Early days of Ghost and Goose’s relationship. Ghost has always prided himself on his ability to handle any situation, no matter how bleak. So why does he find himself so ill equipped to handle something as small as a couple chickens death?

A coyote got into the henhouse last night.

You can hear its yips and snarls, the aggressive barks of your cattle dog as it darts at the chicken wire, the starling lack of clucking. You whistle for the dog, and it races to go check on the other animals. The last thing you need is for the coyote to get into it with Mav when you pull its sorry ass from the chicken pen. You yawn, trying to hold onto the hope that at least some of your ladies got somewhere safe before the carnage started. You’ll stop by the tractor supply later and grab some chicks to bolster your flock again.

You stop. Watching Ghost stand frozen in front of the pen, shoulders tight, barely breathing. His eyes a million miles away.

The pen is littered with half shredded chickens. Feather and muscle strewn about. The wild frenzy of a half starved predator laid out in front of you. The loose organs and scent of death turns your stomach, you can’t imagine what it does to a fresh soldier. Ghost’s finger twitches, beating a rapid tattoo against his thigh, his gun is still neatly holstered. You suppose that’s for the best, or maybe a signal of the worst.

You think about your first fourth of July after your Daddy’s second tour. The way he’d disappeared into the house like a ghost. The way your momma handed you off to your granny and followed after him. How your granny had told you: sometimes you see something so bad it never leaves you.

"Go wait in the house," you tell him as soft as you can, pulling at his arm to try and pull his attention. Ghost nods mutely, eyes still glued to the blood soaked earth and torn limp bodies. "Go on," you press a little more firmly, you lead him away from the henhouse, out of sight of it, "I'll be in shortly."

Ghost follows your direction, ears ringing, head stuffed with cotton. Everything feels far away and yet so brightly present. He can smell gunpowder and burnt flesh, can feel the wet warmth of blood on his clothes where he knows there isn't any. Can hear the shouting. He pushes the front door to the house open and holds the brass handle tight in his fingers for a long moment, just standing, waiting. As if he'll hear the pang of gunfire over the infinitely patient silence.

He goes to the kitchen and puts the kettle on. Stares at the black iron as it sits on the burner and waits for the yip of the coyote, the last gunshot. It doesn’t come. You take his hand in the silence and turn the burner off. Lead him to the table and sit him heavily in one of the wooden chairs. Ghost keeps his eyes forward, his shoulders rigid. He waits. He doesn't know what he's waiting for. For the memories to stop.

His hat is removed, set carefully on the table. A warm cloth touches his face, wiping gently at the crease in his forehead, at the stern set of his brow. Your fingers reach for the edge of his mask and he grabs your wrist, eyes finally darting to yours in a panic. He can't. It's too much, too hard. He can't.

Somehow you seem to understand, fingers sliding instead to cup his jaw, to rub your thumb against his cheek over the soft cotton. The washcloth wipes his brow again, still warm and soothing.

"You're safe," you murmur, "Safe and sound right here with me. And Daddy.” You tack Price on, as if you might not be enough to convince him. As if it isn’t your touch that’s bringing him back, your eyes that hold his with such kind patience it makes his heart hurt. “We won't let anything hurt you."

Ghost doesn’t say anything, can’t make his lips move or conjure a thought as to what he might say. If there is anything to say. Is there anything to say?

You tip his head forward, press the lightly damp cloth against the back of his neck. He lets his hand drop from your wrist as you move your hand from his cheek to scratch your fingers through his hair. Gentle, calming touches. Never asking more from him than his comfort.

He settles his hands on your hips, and for a moment he can pretend you’re his.

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