#(at least until he goes a bit nuts and they all die anyway)

[sherifftillman]

can you do a steve x reader (drabble headcannon anything really) where the reader faints on steve unexpectedly? thank u babes <3

Genre: Fluff

Word count: 899

A/N: me, sitting with my beetlejuice build-a-bear by my side: anything for you, tumblr user lydiadeetzstan <3

"Alright, go nuts," you say to your younger siblings as you open the door to the arcade. While it may be air conditioned in here, which you were hoping for, you forget that other hot, sweaty kids would have packed the building with the same intentions. Trying super hard not to breathe the air in too much, you yell after them, "Remember, hydrate or die-drate!"

They run to some shooting game, and you try to find the coolest spot in the building. Turns out, the coolest guy in the building has had the same idea.

You and Steve had a bit of a repertoire going. You'd go to Family Video to pick out a movie to watch with your friends. He'd roast your choice, then choose one for you, you'd take them both for your friends to watch and write down their reviews of both movies, usually to rub in Steve's face that your friends did prefer your choice all along. You're very aware that you're not the only customer who comes in to have some one-on-one conversation with Steve, but you take what you can get.

He spots you and waves you over to join him, which you do. "Hey! Didn't know this was your scene."

"Not mine. Siblings," you gesture in... A direction. Who knows where they are. "I never knew you had any."

Steve scrunches his face. "I dunno if you can call them tha- hey!" He snaps his fingers up high as he shouts across the room. A pale, gaunt boy with a mullet flips him off. Steve rolls his eyes. "Anyway. Do I get a sneak peek at this week's reviews?"

"Oh, you mean that Taxi Driver was boring, and therefore sucked?" you smile, and Steve pretends to hold his heart in shocked offence.

"You would say that about Taxi Driver?! Okay, okay, don't tell me you're going to say that Airplane! was actually bett-"

"It had us all laughing the whole time, start to finish. At least it made us feel something," you shrug, and Steve shakes his head, taking a sip of his drink. You think to go and get one, but then he makes a hum of realisation and points out the air hockey table as he swallows his sip. "Wanna play? I've been waiting for it to clear."

You accept, trying to keep your cool. You even beat him. He insists on best two out of three. You deliberately slack off in the second game, but his gloating earns him a second loss in the final game. He pulls a face and looks for another game he can beat you at.

Every time you finish a game, regardless of who wins, Steve immediately looks for another. You make a point of making sure you can still see your siblings from wherever you are, though you do keep forgetting to get a drink. The air conditioning is really starting to struggle to keep the building full, with more and more people piling in.

One of the only games left that you haven't tried is a claw machine. Steve grins, "Oh, you know I'm a pro at these."

"Oh yeah?" you ask, scanning the plush toys inside. You point at one of your favourite animal. "Get me that one, then."

"You got it," he smirks, putting money in. "See, the trick is, you gotta really get the claw swinging..." His voice goes quiet, as does all the background noise around you. Everything looks blurry, until -

Next thing you know, you're on the floor, feeling as though you've just woken up from a terrible sleep. Everything is hazy, including the figure hovering over you. You finally make out what he's saying, "Oh god, I can't just go - yes, you, hello! Water, your coldest water bottles, as many as you can bring over, now!"

"Steve?" you ask groggily. He comes into focus, sitting on the floor with you, holding your head in his lap.

"Yeah! Don't panic, take it easy, okay?" You start looking over and pointing, trying to locate your siblings. Steve picks up on that, "Don't sweat it, I got my team distracting them, okay? They're not gonna see you like this." He helps you to sit up, using his body to prop you up as well. The employee returns with several bottles, which Steve takes off their hands easily. "Can you..." Steve makes a gesture with his hands as though he's waving somebody away, then points around the room. More starts coming into focus. All the people staring at you. Great. The employee starts herding them away as Steve hands you a water bottle and presses two more to your forehead. "Drink up, 'kay?"

You nod, gulping half the bottle down in one sip. "God, at least hopefully I've taught my siblings what not to do."

"Shit, you had me worried. I'm so sorry, I should have picked up that you weren't drinking anything," Steve apologises, but you shake your head.

"I'm a big girl, I should have spoken up. Having too much fun, I guess," you laugh.

"Can I make it up to you sometime, at least?" Steve asks.

You tilt your head up to look at him. "Are you going to try to make me like your shooty-shooty movies?"

He laughs, "Not on the first date, no. Maybe like... Third or fourth."

"I'll take those odds," you smile.

#steve harrington x reader #steve harrington imagine #stranger things x reader #stranger things imagine #steve harrington x you #steve harrington fluff #steve harrington fanfic #*myfics

[incorrect-hell-above]

Baby Daryn: can we go out for ice cream?

Lucifer: what did Lily say?

Daryn: she said no

Lucifer: then why are you asking me?

Daryn: because she's not the boss of you

Lucifer, internally: this is a trap this is a trap this is a trap

#incorrect quotes #source: unknown #he would he loves his wife but he loves his kids more #and he is soft for them #(at least until he goes a bit nuts and they all die anyway)

[junicai]

Aria + Periods + 127 = Chaos

Taeil

taeil has a younger sister, so he didn’t need her to explain anything to her

honestly, he’s one of the members she’ll go to first if she needs anything

the least likely to make a big deal out of it

just kinda

shrugs

and does what is needed of him

sometimes pain meds don’t do anything for aria’s cramps they get so bad

and on those days, she’ll slid into his bed and either

A: snuggle with him and let him cuddle her

or B: just curl up underneath his sheets until he gets back from wherever he was and then do option A

he really hates her periods

like, more than she does

because she’s always a little deflated in the upcoming days, and for the first two of the actual periods

and he hates seeing her in pain or be sad

even if the thing she’s sad at is the advertisement of the cute dog

definitely chuckles at her when she comes to him with slightly teary eyes and whines that she misses her dog now

but opens his arms willingly anyway, letting his maknae plonk herself in his lap and rest her head on his chest

Johnny

there is no better man to try and make aria feel better

that’s actually a lie

aria will point blank avoid him on her periods

he read once

once

in an article that physical exercise helps with cramps and the other pms-ing symptoms

and now every single time she opens her mouth to complain about her uterus trying to eject itself from her body

johnny’s right there with an invitation to the gym

he’s literally packed and changed, they can go right now

truth be told aria took him up on the offer once

never again

she couldn’t walk afterwards

he had to carry her out

asides from that though

he’s pretty okay with everything?

like obviously, he doesn’t really get it all too much, but if she wants someone to massage her back, then he’ll offer without too many questions

but when she’s crying about something?

oh ho ho ho

bear hugs

just a big ol’ swaddling hug that makes aria feel warm n safe n content

they heal everything

it’s aria’s life philosophy

Taeyong

totally understanding

she needs pads? he’s either already bought them, or will go out to buy them for her

doesn’t have a tracker for her, but somehow knows when she’s cramping the week before its due

once came up with the innovative idea of using their handwarmers as a makeshift hot water bottle when they were on a schedule and aria was suffering :(

aria gets really bad lower back cramps, and its super common to just see him gently pushing her onto the couch

so he can try and massage some of the tension

keeps pads in his travelling bags

completely unprompted - it just started being something he’d pack

like heat packs and pain patches and bandages;

period supplies just eventually got added to the list

was a little uncomfy with the whole thing at the start

but his older sister yelled at him

told him to stop “being a baby” and “she’s your responsibility, act like it.”

aria felt really bad for burdening him with it all

lowkey wished she was a boy for inconveniencing everyone with it

and taeyong had to sit her down and tell her no baby

it was natural and it didn’t bother anybody

that she didn’t have to hide it

that she could come to them if she was in pain because of it

Yuta

oh this man

when he found out that aria was getting lightheaded on her periods

when he found out that she passed out once on her period

did so much research on why that might have happened and how to help

literally stayed up all night and came to aria the next morning like

“are you eating enough iron?”

the answer was no, btw

made it his mission to make sure aria did after that

always has a little bag of nuts or something else in a side pocket of his bag if he knows aria’s on her period

gets concerned asf when she misses her periods

because he knows it’s because of unnecessary diets or her putting in extra time in the practice room

aria loves going to his room when she’s feeling miserable

he’s always down to watch a movie or just lay down with her

he’ll plait her hair or just lay together and press a lil kiss to her forehead when she whines about the cramps

hates hates hates when she cries

he knows it’s because of hormones, he has two sisters

but that doesn’t make it easier

will do absolutely anything to get her to stop crying

once went out at 3am to get her ice-cream

which actually made her cry harder

bc she felt bad that she couldn’t eat it because she’s lactose-intolerant

he just felt worse

that was not a good night

now the freezer in the dorms has a little tub of non-dairy ice-cream with aria’s name on it

curtesy of yuta

Doyoung

when aria first moved into the 127 dorms

he bought a little pink box with a lid that he then proceeded to fill with tampons and pads; the whole shebang

which he then put in the locker beneath the sink

and told anyone that if they made a big deal out if it, he’d kill them :)

incredibly perceptive

knows when aria’s on her period before aria knows

“hey do u need a pad?” “ why do i need a pad?”

*an hour later*

“oppa do u have any pads”

he’s less of a come here and i’ll comfort you type

and more of a, i’m going to help you from the sidelines without ever actually acknowledging it’s existence

like perceiving it makes it worse

honestly aria’s pretty thankful he’s like this

she loves that the other members take care of her like they do, don’t get her wrong

but its like, for five days - she can do no wrong, she’s accommodated, and sometimes walked on eggshells around

it’s nice to have someone who’s going to treat her like normal

to balance it out

does that stop her pulling the “i’m in pain” card when she’s about to get scolded?

no

Jaehyun

jaehyun doesn’t have any siblings, so he was really learning from scratch with aria

however

that was actually a good thing

because it meant that whatever aria told him; he did

if she needed a heating pack - he’d go find one for her

if she needed to just lie down for a bit - he’d take her into her room and close the curtains to let her take a nap

now, she didn’t take advantage of this

much

but she just thought it was really sweet of him

and tells him as much

and every time, he’ll just pat her head

maybe a lil kiss on the forehead

and pull the blanket up to her chin before leaving and flicking off the lights

that’s kind of the extent of what he’ll do

mainly because the other members have a lot of it covered already

but it’s pretty common for him to give her a piggyback ride somewhere

if her back is cramping a lot and she doesn’t/can’t walk

no complaints

he just kneels down and aria asks him is he sure

like she’s heavy or something

and he’ll just carry her to wherever they’re going

there’s a lot of fantaken pictures from these moments

people speculate that she’s injured or sick

it happens so regularly that nctzens are genuinely convinced that aria just doesn’t possess an immune system

Jungwoo

jungwoo was surprisingly well prepared when aria first bent over from a sudden onset of cramps

man was ready and knew what to do

he had hyuck going out of the room for water

and had a hand placed on her lower back rubbing gently

never really makes a big deal out of it all

although has told her to play it up once or twice because he wanted to go to bed and practice was running late

she did, and they did end practice almost immediately after

honestly, aria’s pretty convinced that all of jungwoo’s information on how to deal with girls on their periods came from a wikihow article

but that did mean that he had taken the time to look up a wikihow article

so she guesses she can forgive him

and honestly, the fact that he takes it upon himself to do a little of her chores?

she’s not complaining

after the first three times she felt bad enough to tell him to stop though

he didn’t

and now it’s just normal

is very conversational about it all

has no problem with asking her what she needs, instead of hovering around and guessing

which makes it easier on aria as well

the first few times, she felt quite burdensome

and jungwoo levelled her with a look when she told him this

“the only way you’d be burdensome, is if you didn’t talk to the rest of us and suffered silently - in pain.”

that was the end of that really

Mark

unfortunately for mark

aria got her first period when she was with him

poor boy thought she was going to die

“ohmygod you’re bleeding - you’re BLEEDING-”

aria had to calm him down before going to the bathroom

he is pretty oblivious as to what exactly goes on

aria complained once that she missed her last two periods because of the stupid diet she was on

mark literally thought she was going to die

very concerned

she had to sit him down and tell him that no, she wasn’t going to die  

he’s gotten better over the years

as a topic, he’s still pretty uncomfortable with discussing it

but its less of a “i’m a man and this isn’t a manly topic” and more of a “i don’t know anything about this subject and i don’t want to offend somebody, help”

he did by her her first hot water bottle cover though

up until then, she had been using hot water bottles wrapped in towels to prevent her skin from burning

but mark showed up one morning

with a yellow fuzzy thing hidden behind her back

it was a winnie the pooh cover :(

Donghyuck

cuddle buddies

that’s his main role

aria on her period? donghyuck’s pulling out the fluffy blankets and making a pile of her plushies on his bed

time to pull out netflix and cuddle

aria could cry every single time she walks into his room and he’s just opening the covers for her to slip underneath

he does it every time

and somehow she’s still not expecting it

it’s been five years bestie

has accidentally made her cry on more than once occasion though

he doesn’t mean to!

sometimes he’ll say something in passing

and aria will get upset but won’t show it

because she knows she’s not actually upset - it’s just hormones

so she doesn’t tell him she’s upset

and just leaves to go to her own room

does that stop doyoung telling hyuck off for being insensitive?

no

not at all

but he’s normally really good! especially after the first few times

living together has generally made him more preceptive

also just growing up in general

if her cramps are really bad she’ll wake up during the night

and if she had slept in hyuck’s bed the night before

then he usually takes it upon himself to go get her pain meds and a hot water bottle

he’ll rub her back and help her fall back asleep

and then he’ll make sure to write down in his phone that she took x brand of pain meds, so in the morning she’ll have to take y instead

#*aria.writings #nct 24th member #nct #nct dream #nct imagines #kpop addition #nct extra member #nct female member #nct female member au #superm #kpop additions #kpop!oc #kpop #nct female oc #nct additional member #nct additions #nct addition #this is reposted bc tumblr hates me #there was a rant about the patriarchy in the notes before #but a re-typed rant doesn't hit the same #*sigh*

[cheeriecherry]

Reactions to our boi finding out that not only were you a fan before meeting but you were fan who wrote smut about them? A secret you've kept hidden but now... Aizawa, Mic, Nighteye

I’m still sick but i need to do something before i go nuts lol, but I’m sorry if it’s a little questionable, I’m like, half awake oof

Warnings: some mentions of smut but nothing super explicit

AIZAWA SHOUTA

-So he’s not necessarily a well known hero, or at least he isn’t usually in the running with the media. So he probably doesn’t have that much merch, or it’s really hard to find.

-So he notices the first time you let him into your room that you have an adorable tsumtsum of him. He doesn’t say anything, doesn’t even let on that he saw it, but he knows that it was probably hard for you to get. He figures out right then that you’re some kind of fan.

-But he thinks it’s pretty casual, and he’s actually (secretly) a little bit pleased that you admire him so much, especially if you don’t have any other hero merch.

-He doesn’t catch on until much later that you write smut about him.

-Like, he knows that such things exist. It’s just how people are, we all love our fanfic. 

-He doesn’t think much of your writing habits at first, always assumes you’re working on papers or other things for your job. He only starts to get suspicious when he walks in on you one night and you get flustered and slap your laptop closed.

-He’s not gonna pry into your business, but he’s definitely curious. 

-After that incident, you start writing less around him, and he starts to to worry. Like, all he did was walk into the room, but he didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. He’s also a little perturbed that you feel like you have to hide things from him.

-He’ll probably ask you about it within a couple weeks, or rather he’ll tell you that you don’t have to be ashamed of the things you’re working on, no matter what it is.

-And you appreciate the sentiment, but you seriously don’t know what you’d do if your boyfriend realized you write porn about him. Most of it’s fantasies you’ve had about him, but written to cater to all his fans.

-You’re not super possessive of him, so like, you don’t mind that people thirst over him. You know that at the end of the day, you’re the only one who’s got his attention.

-But then you fall asleep on the couch one night. You had intended to just shut your eyes for a moment to give them a break, so you’d left your laptop open and leaned back on the sofa. Shouta wasn’t supposed to be home for another couple hours, so you figured you’d be safe.

-But you end up falling asleep, and he ends up coming home early.

-He thinks you’re cute when he sees you cozied up on the cushions, but he sees that your laptop is about to die. He has no idea where you usually keep the cord, so he...well, his intention is to save whatever documents you were so hard on, so you didn’t lose your progress. But his eyes scan a few lines without thinking, and before long he’s reading through the whole thing.

-Ngl he’s flustered as hell. He’ll never admit it, but the things you’ve written are absolutely filthy. It’s nothing like anything you’ve ever done in the bedroom, which he’s actually grateful for (he doesn’t want his sex life being broadcasted on the internet, even if you do work under an alias), but reading your work is giving him ideas.

-Do you actually want to do things like this with him? Or is it really just a fantasy, a story written to appease other people.

-Of course, he’s also a teacher so he finds himself critiquing your writing style and use of language. It’s actually pretty good writing, however sinful the subject matter.

-He quickly goes to save the document, but right as he does, you stir awake.

-He looks at you, you look at him. You’re sleepy as hell, and he’s pink in the cheeks, and you just know right off the bat that he’s figured you out.

-You immediately hide your face in your hands and mumble out an ‘oh god im sorry you were never supposed to find out’ and he’s like ‘how the hell do i approach this’ because it’s such an embarrassing situation when it’s happening.

-He tells you that it’s okay, he really doesn’t mind that you write stuff like that. And truthfully he doesn’t. Lots of people write works directed at adults, and there’s nothing wrong with it. He’s just....it’s the fact that you’re writing about him. Of all the heroes you could have chosen from, you chose him. To write about, to appreciate, to pursue romantically.

-It’s turns into a mushy moment, because of course you chose him?? He’s kind and smart and loving and he cares a lot about you and other people. Plus he’s handsome as heck.

-You’re both still a little shy about it when you head to bed a few minutes later, but you still cuddle up to him in the dark and rest your head on his chest.

-But right when you think all is said and done, he asks ‘Is any of that stuff something you’d ever want to try?’ and a whole new wave of embarrassment washes over you. Like jesus christ have some tact Shouta.

-Whether or not you guys end up experimenting a little more is up to you, but it definitely feels nice to not have to hide it so much. You’re still a little iffy about actually showing him what you write, but that’s mostly because you’re worried your skills won’t be up to his standards.

YAMADA HIZASHI

-Definitely didn’t know you were a fan of his the first few times you met. You acted so normal around him, like he was just another guy, so he figured he wasn’t on your radar. Which is fine by him, he tries not to pursue fans simply because that attraction might not be genuine, y’know?

-Like, ‘is this person with me because they like the idea of me, or because they actually like me’ sort of thing.

-And you’re not an overzealous fan by any means, but the first time he visits your house he realizes he was mistaken. You have a couple of his collectibles; the nice ones that are tasteful, not the corny ones that are a quick cash grab for companies.

-He’s like ??? you didn’t tell me???

-And you’re like ???no???

-Honest to god you didn’t recognize him at first. You’d been in a dimly lit, high-end club, he’d had his hair down, you’d both had a couple of drinks. He just happened to be a guy that you had some things in common with, who was nice to talk to and who made you laugh.

-It relaxes him a little, knowing that you would have been into him even if he wasn’t a hero and a super popular DJ with a radio show. And by the time he’s coming over to your house, you guys probably know each other pretty well anyways. He’s let you into his life, but you’ve also let him into yours.

-He teasingly asks you if you’ve got any more little secrets (even though this was hardly a secret), and he doesn’t expect when you get flustered af and squeak out a ‘nope, not a single one, no secrets’. But he doesn’t think more of it until much later.

-Like, several months later. After you guys move in together.

-He knows that smut about heroes exists, he knows that there is smut about him, and if I’m being honest he probably reads it for shits and giggles. Never to make fun of anyone, but he’s honestly just curious about what people are writing.

-He notices that you write a lot, too. You never show him anything, and whenever he asks about it you tell him it’s ‘just work’. He wonders what kinds of projects you’re taking on that involve so much typing and concentration, and ngl he’s a little sad that you don’t tell him about it.

-Like, sure maybe it’s just work and you’re not particularly invested in it, but he always talks about his students, and his shows, and the ongoings at his job, he just wants to know more about what you do.

-He is a smart man, but sometimes he has stupid ideas.

-He concocts the wise plan to sneak onto your laptop while you’re in the shower and read your most recent document. Not being wholly nosey, just enough so he can do a little research on the subject and learn more about it. He just wants to know.

-Throws him for one bigass loop when he sees what you are actually working on. He’s no stranger to kinky shit, but his entire face goes beet red, redder than any fanfiction has ever made him.

-Something about that fact that it’s you who wrote this, and you who’re thinking those things about him, entertaining ideas like that. Like yeah, y’all have slept together but he had absolutely no clue you’d even be into stuff like that.

-And sure, you could just be writing things for your fans, but you also seem pretty knowledgeable on the subject so like. You had to have some interest in it, right?

-And now he’s thinking about trying those things out with you, and his pants are just a tad bit tighter than could be considered comfortable.

-He’s so distracted he doesn’t notice the shower turn off, nor does he hear you walk into the room. He does, however, catch your hideously embarrassed squawk.

-Which then makes him flustered, because he got caught, and you’d better pat yourself on the back for that one because you’re one of the only people that can make him embarrassed like that.

-But then he’s trying to explain himself, and you’re trying to explain yourself, and it’s a whole mess of words and burning cheeks and somehow you end up both admitting that the things you write about would be real fun to try.

-Lol you guys probably just end up in bed together after that,

-But despite the initial awkwardness, he’s pretty cool with it. He likes your writing, and how involved you are with the community. It’s also handy for him because it lets him keep an ear to his fans without digging too deep, you always let him know what kind of stuff everyone is up to.

-best use it to your advantage, tell him all kinds of filthy things that you’ve come across, especially if it something you know he’ll like. It’s a sure way to get him in the mood >u>

SASAKI MIRAI|SIR NIGHTEYE

-He’s nonplussed about whether or not you’re a fan at first. He doesn’t pay you much mind until he scopes out your sense of humour, or until you say something offhandedly and it makes him laugh.

-Fan or not, if you’re funny and you vibe with each other, then he’ll show some kind of interest in you. It’ll take a little while to progress to something romantic, but in the meantime you’ve got a nice friend.

-He’s kinda busy, so you probably don’t invite him over to your place until a couple months in. Your schedules are conflicting, and you’ve both got important jobs to do, so it’s probably been pushed back a couple times. But he finally makes it over one evening for a night of relaxing socialization.

-You know him well enough to know that it wouldn’t bug him that you were a fan of him before you met him. He’s not the kind of person to make a big deal about it, not really. He sees a couple pieces of merch around your apartment, just small things -some of which he’s surprised to managed to get a hold of- and he’s like ‘okay’

-Like, he really doesn’t care. As long as you treat him like a person and you’re not using him for anything, then hes just.  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

-It’s only afteryou start dating and getting close that he teases you a little bit for it. Not in a rude way, just in an ‘aw you sleep with a plushie of me’ way. He does it so he can fluster you and ruffle your feathers in a loving manner.

-After you move in with him, he notes that you’re on your computer a lot. He figures it’s just an overbearing workload that requires a lot of time, so he reminds you whenever he can to take a break and stretch and give your eyes a rest.

-He’d leave it alone mostly, so in order for him to find out that you’re actually writing smut, he’d have to catch you in the act. He comes home early one evening to get a little extra time with you, and he follows the tapping of the keyboard into your office. You haven’t noticed that he’s even there, that’s how focused you are.

-So he sneaks up behind you with the intent to startle you and wrap you up in a hug, but looking over your shoulder he gets a good view of your screen...and the words on the screen...and his name on the screen...

-It takes you a couple seconds to figure out he’s there, which is dumb because he’s literally just frozen over your shoulder going over the sentences you’ve written as his face gets redder and redder.

-Anyways, he still manages to scare you, and you leap out of your seat and fall onto the floor, but instead of hugging you and saying hello like he originally intended, he’s just kind of frozen on the spot with the pinkest cheeks you’ve seen him have.

-He’s a pretty stoic guy most of the time, at least on the outside. It’s really hard to fluster him, because most of your attempts either make him laugh because you’re cute, or result in some really nice romantic time. He’s just. Not really shy about stuff?

-But this is a whole different thing.

-You’re on the floor dying of embarrassment and telling him not to read, but he is Looking and Not Listening. You just seem so innocent and chill about things, he never would have expect something like this from you. It’s not a bad thing, it’s just really surprising.

-Secretly he’s a little bit pleased that you’re writing this kind of stuff about him, and not some other heroes, but he probably won’t say it out loud. Not to mention your writing is actually really good? Like, it flows perfectly and the descriptions are easy to imagine but not super complicated or convoluted.

-He’s a smart guy, and he knows that fans of heroes are into all kind of things, fanfiction included. He’s not offended by it, by any means. He just never supposed that he’d be popular enough to warrant fanfic about him, let alone written by his own partner.

-He tries to be chill about it, asking you if you’re into that kind of stuff and if you should switch it up in the bedroom a bit. It’s pretty obvious he’s flustered tho. 

-It would probably lead to a good long talk about what sort of stuff you’re both into, after the initial embarrassment dies down. And honestly, he’s home early to spend time with you, so why not just try some stuff out right now?  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

-He would definitely read your fics if you want him to, hell, even if you don’t outright ask him he might seek them out out of curiosity. He’s usually busy in the day, but he’ll find time to read through things and give you honest feedback.

-Lol tho if you’re still shy about it, he might make an account with an alias just so he can give you nice comments. It doesn’t take very long for you to figure him out though. He’s got a very specific typing style and his personality shines through, but only people who know him would recognize it.

-I headcanon this guy as a kinky mf ngl, but also as someone who can go without hardcore stuff, y’know? So whether or not you actually want to try out some of your fantasies is up to you, but he’s 100% down for it.

#aizawa x reader #aizawa shouta x reader #eraserhead x reader #present mic x reader #yamada hizashi x reader #sir nighteye x reader #sasaki mirai x reader #bnha x reader #mha x reader #bnha headcanons #mha headcanons #deadlyelixir

[gavin-plz-call-me]

Can I have the WC boys reacting to MC who cracks dark jokes and generally has a dark sense of humor?

First things first I'd like to apologize for the delay in answering this ask for you. My computer is being fixed right now, and I'm actually at the library finishing up this prompt 😅 Anyways, thanks for the ask!!

TW: Mentions of Suicide and bodily harm against one's self and others, nothing too graphic though, just baseless threats.

There's also a brief mention of periods, but everything is gender neutral besides that.

Yooha

Is the most likely of the boys to laugh along with you.

When he was still in the painting he heard you crack a few dark jokes, most of them at your own expense "I didn't find that fortune teller and all I got was this dumb-ass painting, that's it, I'm jumping in front of a bus."

And he's just like, lmao same also tf is a bus?

Until he realizes you need to free him, then he's yelling like a madman knowing full well that you can't hear a word he's saying, begging you to at least wait until he's free to die.

I'm getting serious Beetlejuice (the musical, I've never seen the movie 😅) vibes from the two of you.

When he's finally free from the painting and he grows a bit more attached to you he'll be a bit concerned for you, but as long as you assure him they're jokes and you don't ever sound too serious about it, then he'll mostly laugh along with you.

He also eggs you on when you're making dark jokes directed at other people.

"Hansol, I swear to god if you don't turn down your music I'll smash in your kneecaps." Yooha's already handing you a bat to do the deed and Hansol is terrified

All in all, the two of you are a chaotic duo.

Taehee

Taehee finds out about your habit while you're on your period one day.

"Taehee, how much do you think I'd get if I sold my uterus on the black market?"

"Well, you'd probably get a couple t- why do you want to know?"

"Well I was thinking of cutting my uterus out and I might as well get a few bucks from it."

He sort of just awkwardly laughs it off, but he definitely talks to his therapist coworkers to see if there's anything he should be doing for you.

In all honesty, though, he feels terrible and sort of blames himself for your constant dark jokes, I mean the dark jokes are probably a coping mechanism for your awful childhood, and in his mind your bad luck is entirely his fault.

He won't say much to get you to stop saying them though, but don't you dare joke about killing yourself in front of him.

You will bring this man to tears before you can get your entire joke out, and he won't leave your side for the rest of the day in fear of you actually doing something.

On the other hand, as long as Yooha is on the receiving end of your jokes, Taehee will egg you on occasionally.

"Yooha! If you leave the toilet seat up one more time, I'm cutting your balls off!"

"So what you're gonna want to do is make a small incision at the base of the scrotum..." Will give you full, medically accurate, instructions.

Yooha is currently looking into athletic cups to protect his baby makers.

Hansol

Idk why, but Hansol gives me major car-boy vibes, and I like to imagine him pointing cool cars out to you when he's bored.

"Wow! Look at that one MC! It's so cool!"

"Damn, that thing looks expensive. Imagine how much money I'd get if they ran me over. I could pay off my debts and still have enough money to buy a jacuzzi." You then stand up, and take a few steps towards the car, all in a joking matter of course, but Hansol doesn't get that.

He literally attaches himself to your torso, dragging you away from the street, tears in his eyes "You can have all my money, MC, just please don't hurt yourself like that."

You're gonna have to assure him you're joking.

After that incident, he understands your jokes a little more, but still gets anxious when you jokingly say you're gonna hurt yourself.

Doesn't like it much when you're jokes attack other people as well.

"Biho, if you don't wake up right now I'm gonna eat your goldfish alive."

"MC! Biho's a baby, he can't help that he sleeps too much, and his poor goldfish have nothing to do with this."

Maybe lay off on the dark humor in front of Hansol.

Biho

Please don't make dark jokes in front of him, he will cry.

You make your first dark joke to Biho some time after Taehee re-ties your fates.

"Biho, can you hand me that knife? My pinky hurts so bad, I'm just gonna cut it off."

Biho's first instinct is to steer you into his and Hansol's room so he can keep an eye on you, all while you're trying to explain to him that you were 100% okay maybe 99% joking, but he's not having it.

After he puts you in Hansol's care, he goes straight to Taehee to beg him to untie your fates so you don't cut your finger off.

It takes you and Taehee a considerable amount of time to convince him you were joking.

Does not like when you make jokes concerning yourself, and takes every single one seriously.

He's a little more relaxed when you make jokes at the expense of others, but he's very logical about your threats.

"Taehee, if you don't promise not to put some health-nut herbs in our dinner tomorrow, I'm shoving my spaghetti up your ass!"

"That might be a bit difficult to do. First of all, spaghetti is very flimsily and probably wouldn't go into Tahee's butt very well, secondly Taehee is much stronger than you so I don't think you'd be able to get to his butt very well, third..." and on and on and on.

Biho is a very practical goblin, so unless you want a very well meaning lecture about the insertablility of spaghetti, I suggest you don't make dark jokes in front of him.

#wannabe challenge #wannabe challenge yooha #wannabe challenge taehee #wannabe challenge hansol #wannabe challenge biho #wannabe challenge headcanon #wannabe challenge headcanons #com2us #wannabe challenge fic #wannabe challenge fanfic #sorry this was a bit late #my keyboard stopped working #and the library keyboard sucks too #sad face

[the-acid-pear]

Tumblr is ready to kick me in the nuts, so to avoid that, regulatory second post of this dumb liveblog! Let's go-

Chapter 211

Oh that's an insane coincidence

I'm gonna lose my fucking shit

Yujiro's fucked up anatomy is so fucking funny

He's just built different y'all let him be :/

I like how he's talking alone

Chapter 212

Erect 😳 (sorry I'm 5)

It's been so long since i saw someone open a bottle normally lol

Hehe hairy. Reminds me of Garland in a way, i miss him.

God i would fucking die out of embarrassment if i was on Retsu's place 😐

4001 🥺

Utterly obsessed with mfs being able to recognize the real ppl in this manga lmao

Chapter 213

I don't know if that's a real proverb but if Retsu says it I'll buy it

GOD I LOVE THIS MAN AUGH

Get his ass Retsu 😍

Chapter 214

What is a "rule"? 🤨

I keep forgetting he's missing a leg, están todos mochos estos protagonistas

Retsu be looking like a wet puppy all of the sudden mf went 🥺

Haha i wish i could squish an arm like that ☺️

This is so damn boxing like YESSS this is how every boxing movie goes so true!!! 😍

Which makes the dramatism funny bc we know Retsu can kill

OYDIRAITWOUROYE

Someone in the comments mentioned how if feels like reading with friends and honestly that's so true 🥰

Chapter 215

I love how he has some fans already

RIGHT THESE MFS FIGHT FOR NO ONE AND FOR NOTHING JUST FOR HONOR

Yeah no if a guy like that appeared irl i too would cheer for him

Retsu is having a crisis did he really not know this was all a farse? Like dude, c'mon.

Retsu got up in this ring ready to kill lmao

IYSITITSTSIIT nahhh i trust Retsu ~

"so hairy... but so elegant."

I just realized i got the song inexplicable stuck in my head bc that was the name of the chapter lol

Chapter 216

God i love Retsu so much i have so much hope placed on him

I think Retsu has one of the best character developments in this entire franchise (at least judging by so far)

YESSSSSS KINGGG 😍😍😍

Chapter 217

God i was looking like 👁️👁️ until i realized that was a mouthguard

I just came from the hospital and I'm a bit out of the loop lol

King shit i think I'm super out of it but that was badass i think

Jgzuggdlityfoh the drivers face 😭

I wonder what he will do with 2 million dollars tho

Chapter 218

Bruh his hair got cut by thin air

Did his hair get longer?

Baki really became a "well done, son!" guy

This conversation feels so fucking weird

Oh no one understands shit in the comments either, fair

Chapter 219

Yujiro legitimately surprised by kindness 😧

HE'S SO LEGITIMATELY SURPRISED, i mean considering how Baki had been since he's 13 it makes sense

I'm losing my fucking mind, yujiro i love you but i hate you

I like how most think this Yujiro is fake, i think he isn't <3

Someone called Yujiro autistic and i can't tell if they mean it literally or as an insult, like he IS a very picky guy who always wears the same clothes and has a mad low empathy... Murder is his special interest 🥰 /j

Chapter 220

I honestly feel happy for Baki, he's so euphoric over his dad hanging out with him lmao

I miss Kureha's bangs :/

Tokugawa please stop killing urself

Obsessed this man will literally die, unironically wondering why Itagaki would do that

Mfs speaking shit of Retsu's boxer arc... Stfu it's so fun :/

Chapter 221

Isn't 36 a big number for a boxer?

I really wonder what Retsu wants the money for, dude doesn't live a wild life, he doesn't often drink, he doesn't fuck, he doesn't do drugs...

KWHWKDHSUS THE FIRST TIME SOMEONE ACKNOWLEDGES THESE MEN'S GAY ASSES

ALI SR!?

Kinda sweet how he's doing this for Baki i guess

There is a guy defending Retsu with teeth and nail n like all true bestie <3

Chapter 222

Tf is that foot? Who owns it?

OOOOH SHIBA!!! MY BELOVED 🥺

Shiba against Baki?! Iit surely can't be, he must just be taking him to Hanayama, right?

TF SHIBA? YOU KNOW NOT EVEN YOUR BOSS CAN WIN AGAINST HIM!

GET HIS ASS RETSU PLEASE

Chapter 223

We are all wondering the same, Baki <:/

Yeah it is kinda badass

Shiba please, at least Baki won't kill him so it's ok but STILL BRO PLS-

Rip Retsu 😔💔

Chapter 224

Slender?! Bro this mf mad buff

I'm so obsessed with this like Shiba didn't show up in how many chapters then randomly decides to fight Baki. Also, Hanayama is gonna die of cirrhosis :/

WITH OPEN HAND TO THE CHIN...

Chapter 225

I wonder how this will affect Shiba

Crying and shaking Retsu get up 😭

Retsu i love your monologue and analysis but you are sort of in a fight?

Holy fuck Retsu is tripping balls

Chapter 226

Shiba please

>:<

OHDIRSISTDOYHD BAKI JUST WANTS TO CHILL PLEASEEE

FUCKING BITCH SLAPPED

A gentler devil... I like that

IYDOYDITSUSITURSDUT

On god is this how Yujiro feels? Thought tbf Yujiro used to make ppl hate him on purpose ;/

Chapter 227

"i will teach you something" *breaks your jaw*

Obsessed with who i assume is young Kaku btw

SPIN?

Chapter 228

Dude the shoes :/

Aw he's so nice ☺️

"that last panel looking like he bout to drop some beats but knowing the situation he's going to ve dropping a body"

Chapter 229

Poor coach lmao

He DID move lol

OBSESSED HE'S SPINNING ON HIS PEG LEG 😭

Retsu don't lose 😢

Chapter 230

"what did he get???" OUFOOYDOTSUEAIRW 😭😭😭

Shiba... Baby, you will die.

I love how nicely he's taking it lmao

This is LITERALLY Katsumi vs Doyle

SOMEONE ELSE MENTIONED IT LMAO

Anyways good luck on Shiba and wanting to taste defeat

Reality is my phone reset on its own and i lost the last 4 chapters but that's fine, i need to take a nap anyway

#luly talks #baki liveblog #im enjoying this saga its so chill :] #its pretty slow but its ok bc its fun #you know its like kidna silly even like #i knowww its baki and all but this story makes no sense. when tf are baki and yujiro fighting? they keep hyping it up and then going sike! #like ffs Mitsunari is literally dying can you guys just leet that old man die happy?! /hj #i AM starting to miss doppo and my grandpa and the others like its fun seeing Shiba but :\ you know? wjwgjwgs #WE NEED ANOTHER TOURNAMENT SO BAD FFS... #im tired of street fights i want to see a proper fight again!!! #i mean i guess thats what retsu is currently doing but still :/ (?

[blitzturtles]

Title: Adjustments

Rating: Teen and Up (Johnny's got a bit of a mouth.)

Fandom: JoJo's Bizarre Adventure: Steel Ball Run

Pairing(s): GyJo

Summary: Gyro doesn’t know what he'd expected walking in through the front door of his and Johnny’s apartment, but he’s pretty sure that it hadn’t been this. What, with Johnny on the floor, wheelchair tilted sideways, and an irritated look on his face.

Notes: Modern AU with modern wheelchairs, and all the fun times that brings about.

-

Gyro doesn’t know what he'd expected walking in through the front door of his and Johnny’s apartment, but he’s pretty sure that it hadn’t been this. What, with Johnny on the floor, wheelchair tilted sideways, and an irritated look on his face.

“What are you doing?”

“Trying to adjust my footplate,” Johnny says like it’s the most obvious thing in the world, and maybe it is, given the drill in one of his hands and the wrench in the other, both of which are affixed to the footplate in question.

Gyro squints at him anyway, “Why?”

“Because it’s bothering me.”

“You- can’t feel it?”

“No shit?" Johnny asks with a raised brow, and Gyro has to admit that he could have phrased that better. "Look, I just- don't like it," Johnny says with a huff before turning his attention back to his chair. There’s a can of lubricating spray and a collection of paper towels waded up underneath the chair, and there’s even an old toothbrush with what looks to be a decent amount of dirt and grime on it. It's clear to Gyro that Johnny's tried multiple solutions already, and, judging by the scrunched up look on his face, he's still not getting anywhere.

“Did you talk to your PT?” Gyro asks without thinking, because it’s in his training to question these things and in his DNA to be concerned for those he cares about, patient or not. Johnny’s chair is set up the way it is for a reason, though Gyro will admit that his specialty isn’t in spinal cord injuries. Or the aftermath. He rarely gets the privilege of seeing a patient weeks down the line, much less months and years later. But Johnny's different, because he's more than a patient. More than a brief moment on Gyro's radar. Johnny's his boyfriend, and he can't help worrying.

At least not until Johnny gives him one of the worst eat-shit-and-die looks that’s ever graced his features.

“Alright, alright,” Gyro raises his hands in surrender, “Just- let me see.” He holds out his hand for the drill and moves to take a seat beside Johnny. He takes the hex wrench once he’s settled and uses it to hold the bolt in place while the drill bit goes on the nut. The lubricating spray is a good sign that it’s stuck, or at least giving Johnny problems, so he expects some difficulty.

“You ain’t gonna get it. I‘ve been trying all fuckin’ day,” Johnny bitches beside him, but Gyro focuses on the task at hand.

It takes some work, and the drill torques his wrist painfully twice before Gyro gets an idea of what needs to be done. After that, it’s fairly simple, and he has both nut and bolt free in a matter of a minute or two. The other three come off in much the same fashion, and it’s not until he turns to deposit all the loose pieces into Johnny’s hand that he realizes the Johnny’s staring at him.

“You loosened it up for me,” Gyro says quickly.

“Bullshit, I did!”

Gyro tries to bite back a laugh, but he’s only somewhat successful. “I’m serious, without the lubricating stuff, this probably wouldn’t have worked. You would have gotten it.”

Johnny says nothing, only stares at him with wide, blue eyes before he’s grabbing Gyro's face with his free-- though greasy-- hand and tugging him forward into a rather aggressive kiss. Their noses bump together, but Johnny doesn’t slow down until he’s pulling back and gasping for air. His fingers stay tangled in Gyro’s hair (which Gyro’s going to have to wash again, dammit; not that he’s really that upset about it.)

“You’re welcome?”

“Fuck you,” Johnny shoots back and leans in to kiss Gyro a second time.

#gyjo #gyro zeppeli #johnny joestar #sbr #steel ball run #jjba #jjba part 7 #jojo's bizarre adventure #blitzwrites #look some random person #came in and did this for me #wasn't actually tempted to kiss him but man #was i so fucking grateful #blitz

[thebibliomancer]

Essential Avengers: Avengers #248: “To Save the ETERNALS!”

October, 1984

Scarlet Witch: “It’s raining ETERNALS!”

Hallelujah?

This is a pretty striking cover. The white background is what sells it. Having an actual background would busify the cover too much.

So last times on Avengers: Bored after giving the chairman role to Vision, Wasp takes Starfox’s invitation to crash a party hosted by Sersi, a truant Eternal. Some other Eternals come to fetch Sersi for a Big, Important Eternal Thing and Wasp and Starfox end up getting dragged along when they try to stop the kidnapping.

After Sersi and Ikaris recap the Eternals’ ENTIRE HISTORY, Starfox realizes hey he’s an Eternal too! So he gets invited to the big, important Eternal Thing. Which is turning into a giant flying brain. As ya do.

But jerk fiend and eventual Great Lakes Avengers punchline Maelstrom takes advantage of all the Eternals being a giant brain and attacks, knocking out spectating Avengers Wasp and Captain Monica Marvel.

So thats a lot.

Vision and Scarlet Witch arrive in Greece after seeing Maelstrom on the video phone.

While Vision flies off in a big hurry, Scarlet Witch goes back into the Quinjet for some good exposition.

She continues to be worried about how Vision has been acting lately. Because after seeing Maelstrom, Vision barely said a word during the flight to Greece and kept pushing the engines until Wanda was afraid they’d blow up. But since he just took off and she can’t fly, she calls up what files the Avengers have on Maelstrom.

Which is Benn Grimm, the Thing, reporting on Marvel Two-in-One #72, where he teamed up with Black Bolt to fight Maelstrom who claimed to be the son of a renegade Inhuman. In the end, the Thing tossed a tube of anti-terrigen gas in his face and then Maelstrom appeared to die in an underwater cave-in.

Vision returns from his reconnaissance and does Wanda a startle so she finally unloads on him for how he’s been acting.

Scarlet Witch: “You don’t seem to be thinking at all these days! We haven’t had a real conversation since you became Avengers chairman! Half of our trip to Washington was taken up by a private meeting you had with the president! Afterwards, you didn’t even have the decency to tell me what you talked about! I had to hear from a reported that you’d discussed making the Avengers chairmanship a cabinet level post! We used to be so open with one another! What is happening to us? What is the matter? Is it me?”

Vision says ‘its not you, its me’ although in the context of him being at fault and not breaking up with her.

But he promises to do better and that she’s important to him.

Which would be heart-warming and romantic if he wasn’t making this face over her shoulder.

Why.

Anyway, with uh whatever that is handled, Vision reports what he found on his scouting nyoom.

He found the Eternal city on the side of Mount Olympus because of course its there.

Although. Wait. Where do the Olympians live? Are they neighbors? Do the Olympians live in another dimension or something? I vaguely remember something like that.

And Vision found Maelstrom who’s wearing a silly techno-harness connected to a big machine and has Captain Marvel and Wasp chained up at his feet.

You have problems, Maelstrom.

Not least of which is that his big scheme is to absorb the giant brain to make himself more powerful.

He blabs his plan to the Wasp who woke up when she sensed the opportunity to sass.

Wasp: “You seem awfully sure of yourself, Maelstrom.”

Maelstrom: “Ah, the Wasp! Back among the conscious, I see! Yes, I am quite confident... Supremely confident, you might say.”

Wasp: “But not so confident that you felt you could keep us here untied!”

Maelstrom: “If you are trying to shame me, it will not work. I am quite without shame!”

Curses, he’s immune to petty ego games.

Wasp also assumes he’s an Eternal which he’s quick to correct. No, see, his mom was a Deviant. And I guess his dad was an Inhuman, based on the Thing’s report on him. But its not like he wants revenge for all the Deviants being compressed into a giant cube.

After all, the Deviants killed his mom and raised Maelstrom in their slave pits.

In fact, after Maelstrom absorbs the giant brain, his next plan is to release the Deviants from the giant Deviant cube one by one and then do harm to them.

But, yeah, no. He does look like an Eternal. Easy mistake to make. The Eternals have been making that mistake as Maelstrom has just been hanging around for days with all the Eternals assuming he’s just some Eternal.

He’s actually maybe a little bit regretful that he has to kill them all to absorb the giant brain since the Eternals have actually been nice to him?

Maelstrom: “But power belongs to those who are willing to seize it!”

Interesting guy, Maelstrom.

He starts absorbing the Uni-Mind and totally spaces out doing that. But unfortunately, Wasp is in no position to capitalize on it because he put some leech manacles on her which are preventing her from shrinking. And Captain Marvel is completely out cold.

But Vision sneaks up intangible through the ground as he do like to do and intangibles his fingers into Maelstrom’s harness, shorting it out.

The energy discharge knocks Vision on his ass unconscious but Maelstrom just has to take a knee.

He yells up at an ominous figure standing up on a tower for not telling him that Vision was sneakign up on him. Maelstrom obviously thinks that this Deathurge is his minion but Deathurge has differing opinions.

Deathurge: For so long have I been with Maelstrom, yet still he does not understand! Still he thinks of me as his lackey! When will he learn... it is a darker power I truly serve!

Kinda wonder why he’s here. He doesn’t seem to be helping Maelstrom’s great brain heist and mostly just seems to... stand on a tower and look ominous.

But while Maelstrom was distracted yelling at a guy, the Uni-Mind breaks free of Maelstrom’s siphon and then explodes into a bunch of Eternals again.

Because it would be very improbable if that happened.

Your plan scheme just got Wanda’d, Maelstrom.

Huh. When I saw the cover, I wouldn’t have guessed that Wanda is the reason why its raining Eternals, hallelujah.

Goes to shows.

But since it was very improbable indeed that the Uni-Mind would explode into peoples, Wanda is wiped out.

Captain Marvel starts waking up and Wasp orders her to bust the chains, don’t even think about just go go go.

And Monica Marvel CHOOOMs the leech manacles.

It’s probably a testament to her power that she can bust right through the power dampening handcuffs but Maelstrom immediately hits her with some pink with kirby krackle which apparently is an energy field for sapping strength and down goes Captain Marvel again.

>=|

Wasp dodges the pink energy and gets out of the way so Vision can shoot his forehead laser at Maelstrom.

I sometimes forget he has that thing.

Vision: “Yes, Maelstrom, I have found your weakness! you are vulnerable to energy that is not purely kinetic! That is why you required the power siphon to absorb the psionic energy of the Uni-Mind!”

Maelstrom insists that he’ll still kick Vision’s ass except we’ll never know if he was talking out his ass or not.

Starfox wakes up from being a giant brain and decides to go punch the bad guy.

Except except except.

Punches is kinetic energy. Fool that he is, Starfox just recharged Maelstrom.

Starfox: “I am Eros, called the Starfox... son of Mentor! The blood of the Eternals flows in my veins... and I am an Avenger! Thus I have the greatest stake in seeing you fall!”

Maelstrom: “No doubt! But you’ll not accomplish it this way!”

And then suddenly giant Maelstrom just picks up Starfox and hurls him at Vision who is forced to super-dense catch Starfox instead of intangible out of the way and let the idiot hit a wall head first.

Hm. Guy absorbs kinetic energy and gets beefier? So he’s like a less stylish Sebastian Shaw?

That’s not a flattering comparison for you, Maelstrom.

Makarri, Thena, and Ikaris of the Eternals wake up and also try to jump on and pummel Maelstrom.

... God, its like they weren’t even paying attention.

Good thing they’re immortal because they have no survival instinct among them.

Maelstrom throws them off and then whips out the pink bio-kinetic energy again, using it to crowd control the Eternals.

Then he announces that yeah, sure, the brain thing was foiled. But he absorbed enough information while he was draining the Uni-Mind that he has an even cooler plan for even greater power now.

So his new plan is to just leave. And go do something else.

‘Walk away with no further conflict you say? Nuts to that!’ - Scarlet Witch, presumably.

In fairness. This isn’t really a no harm, no foul situation.

I wouldn’t give Maelstrom over to the Eternals to add to the Deviant cube but he’s just going to do more asshole things if he walks away.

Starfox wants to go over and start punching Maelstrom again because. I DUNNO! The man is supposed to be smarter than this!

Vision stops him and tells him that instead he’ll need to use his pleasure power on Vision’s mark.

Starfox is startled that Vision knows about his secret weirdo power but this isn’t the time for a conversation.

Instead its time for microwaves.

Vision signals Captain Marvel to do her thing and she flies at Maelstrom, turning into infrared and microwave radiation, toasting Maelstrom up.

Then Wasp pew pews with her pew pew, while staying ten feet away so he can’t absorb any kinetic energy. That’s apparently why her stings sucked when she tried shooting him before. She got too close.

Well, her stings are bio-electrical so him absorbing her bio-kinetic energy would probably weaken them? Probably?

Maelstrom actually panics a little because the Avengers aren’t being dumb. They’re pelting him with energy attacks from a distance, wearing him down and not giving him a chance to build up his energy stores again.

I’m proud of you, guys. I knew you could fight smart if you put your minds to it.

Then with Maelstrom weakened, Starfox tries to use his PLEASURE BEAMS and tells him that actually we’re all friends here, won’t you be our friend?

Starfox: “The others will tell you I’m not one to hold a grudge! Besides, you really don’t want to hurt anyone! You’ll be much happier giving yourself up!”

Maelstrom: “Giving... up? Y-yes, that does sound nice. I... No!! What are you doing to me?!?”

So since Maelstrom succeeds his will save against the persuasion check, or something, Scarlet Witch just casts a spell of ‘on your knees, asshole’ and makes Maelstrom fall to his knees.

Realizing that he might actually be defeated, in the city of his mother’s enemies no less!, Maelstrom calls out for Deathurge to attend him.

Deathurge: “At last, the call I have longed for!”

Hmmmm. Maybe Maelstrom should have been more specific.

I admit that its very possible that this is exactly what Maelstrom wanted Deathurge hanging around for. But having a guy standing by to kill you so you don’t have to tally an L sure is an interesting way of going about things.

Also, the narration says spear but Deathurge’s weapon is clearly a very anime scythe. A dude in Bleach had two of this exact weapon.

Captain Marvel, as the nyoomiest of the Avengers, flies at Deathurge as the “spear” returns to his hand. He tries to hit her with the “spear” but it goes right through her and then she goes right through him when she tries to tackle him.

Since they can both be intangible, Deathurge declares this a stalemate and drops down into the ground. Captain Marvel tries to follow as x-rays but loses the ominous weirdo.

So that was a thing that happened.

Maelstrom sure folded like nothing once people who knew how his powers work actually started fighting back.

And I can’t even ding him for explaining his powers because he didn’t. Vision just did his research.

Anyway, even though the Uni-Mind ritual was interrupted, the Eternals still learned what they should be doing. Since the Eternals have grown stagnant on Earth, THEY’RE GOING TO SPAAAAACE!

Most of them anyway.

Ikaris, Sersi, Thena, Valkin... Lets just say the main Eternals are going to stay on Earth.

The Eternals chosen to go out into space form a Uni-Mind again, grabs the Deviant cube, hurls it out of the solar system, and then takes off into space.

“So does the Uni-Mind, in all its wisdom, protect its native world from the Deviant menace.”

Eeeesh.

I thought squeezing them all into a cube was bad enough, now you’re sending them into space forever? You couldn’t find a planet where they can’t hurt anyone and just dunk them there?

Back down on Earth, the Avengers and Eternals watch a giant brain fly into space.

Wasp: “To think, this all started with Starfox and me crashing Sersi’s party! I certainly never expected to be in Greece at day’s end, watching the Eternals leave Earth!”

Really makes you think. That its a good thing that most Avengers’ day job is being an Avenger.

Captain Marvel asks Starfox if he’s sorry that he didn’t go with the giant brain and he says participating in one Uni-Mind thing was an incredible experience that he wouldn’t have missed but he’s a free spirit and there’s a bunch of stuff he still wants to do on Earth.

Which Sersi certainly agrees with.

The Avengers offer her a lift back home and she has perhaps the greatest of attitudes about everything that went down.

Sersi: “I hope my friends in the city have kept the party going! If they haven’t... well, we’ll just have to start one of our own!”

That’s the spirit!

But meanwhile, halfway around the world in a secret underground lair, Deathurge pops out of the floor.

Villains are villainous and all but you can’t beat the class of “secret underground lair.” Step up, heroes.

Deathurge struts over to some tubes and goes Everything Has Transpired According to Plan.

Because inside one of the tubes (or maybe all of the tubes??) is a fresh new Maelstrom body!

Deathurge: If all goes as you have planned, you shall soon awaken within this newly prepared body, ready to live again. And, as ever, I will stand by... ready to attend... Until all your lives have been lived!

Well!

No wonder Maelstrom has a dude standing by to pop him. He’s got extra lives!

Anyway, that was the unexpected Eternals three-parter nobody called for. But Avengers is the place to go to tie up loose ends from other books and concepts.

Avengers’ll accommodate you, they have room in their hearts and publishing schedule.

Follow @essential-avengers​ because there’s more Maelstrom coming! Wait, is that anything people want? There’s also Hercules! I know people like Hercules! He gives the best hugs! Also like and reblog if you like to reblog.

#avengers #Maelstrom #Deathurge #Eternals #Starfox #the Vision #Scarlet Witch #captain marvel #Monica Rambeau #the Wasp #essential avengers #essential marvel liveblogging #just another one of those days for the avengers #the eternals have a really galaxy brain idea

[iwillhaveamoonbase]

Love at First Bite

Rayla is taken by a client to eat at the Italian-Korean fusion place in town and falls in love with the food, and later, the chef.

-------------------------------------------------

Rayla smiled at her client as they waited for their server to come.  Her boss had told her that they had to keep the contract with the client’s company no matter what, and if that meant going to a Korean-Italian fusion restaurant that would probably be too spicy for Rayla’s Scottish, fried-food-loving taste buds, so be it.  The client, Ms. Danvers, had been hyping the restaurant up all evening.  “You said you like potatoes?  This place as amazing kimchi-style potatoes and potato pancakes.”

Rayla nodded.  “My grandmother is Irish and there are always potatoes cooking in her house.”  Rayla subtly looked around the dining room. The walls were mostly white with a few panels a beautiful red.  There was artwork on the walls, ranging from sceneries to portraits.  They all looked to be done by the same artist but Rayla couldn’t place a name to them.  The air was warm and smelled of spices and herbs and cheese.  Rayla could see a row of cheeses on one of the shelves.  “Do they use a lot of cheese here?”

“Korean food pairs wonderfully with cheese.  There’s a rumor that all the vegetables here are from the local farmer’s market as are most of the cheeses.  It’s fusion, but it’s as domestic as possible, too.”

“You’ve really been talking this place up.”

Ms. Danvers flushed.  “It’s my favorite restaurant.  I come here for lunch once a week and get take-away whenever I’m having a bad day.  This place is known for Korean-Italian fusion, but they make a delicious Thai laksa and a vegetarian Tom Yum that is to die for.”

“Really?”  Rayla didn’t know that much about Asian food, but she knew that Tom Yum was common in Thai eateries.

“The chef is a quarter-Thai and a quarter-Korean, his grandparents being from Thailand and South Korea.  He knows the flavors well and plays with them, but when he goes authentic, he’s the best in town.  He will also make almost any dish vegetarian if you request it.”

“How accommodating.”

A server came up, a smile on their face.  “Good evening and welcome to Sarai’s Place.  Any wine to start this evening?”  Rayla shook her head, surprised when Ms. Danvers asked for Thai iced tea for the both of them.  “And what can I get started for you?”

“Ms. Burrows?”

Rayla looked down at the menu again.  “Hmm.  I’m not sure what to get.  I don’t have a very high spice tolerance.”

The server nodded.  “Scale of 1 to 10?”

“Maybe a three.”

“Do you like kimchi?”

“Never had it.”

“Then I recommend trying the kimchi potatoes, if you like potatoes, or the risotto, which features chopped kimchi, sesame oil, and garlic.  The chef makes two kinds of kimchi, one mild and one spicy, so he’ll use the mild for you.  For the main dish, if you enjoy cheese, a pasta dish that has mussels, a Korean chili paste and tomato sauce, and fresh parmesan.  Everything that can be local, is local and if you eat vegetarian, the mussels will be taken out and instead you will get mushrooms.”

“My grandmother is Irish so I’m very snobbish with my potatoes.”

“I would rate his potato pancakes a ten.  He takes the traditional Korean recipe and adds parmesan cheese and some rosemary and its cooked with the house chili oil, so when you cut into it, it’s cheesy and subtly spicy.  The house chili oil is made with both gochugaru and the type of dried chilis usually used to make olio di peperocino.”

“I’ll go with the pancakes and the mussels pasta you suggested.”

“Excellent choice.  And for you?”

Ms. Danvers smiled.  “Did he make Tom Yum or laksa today?”

“Laksa.”

“I will take a bowl of laksa while Ms. Burrows is eating her pancakes and I will also take the mussels pasta.  Can we also get an order of garlic bread?”

“Of course.  I’ll get your Thai iced teas ready.  Anything else today?”

“What’s the dessert of the week?”

“Since it’s summer, mango pudding, Thai coconut pudding, and strawberry-lime cheesecake.”

“We’ll each take a slice of the strawberry-lime cheesecake.”  The server nodded and walked away after reading back the list.  “I hope you don’t mind me ordering dessert for you, but he only makes that cheesecake when the strawberries are in their peak season and it’s worth it.”

Rayla nodded.  “No problem, Ms. Danvers.  I wouldn’t really know what to order otherwise.”

They chatted while they waited, pausing when the garlic bread came to the table.  Rayla had been expecting the kind of garlic bread Americans seemed to adore, buttery and almost artificially garlic-y.  Instead, they got small, fresh loaves that had pieces of roasted garlic and thyme baked into it, served with the house chili oil and garlic that had been cooked until it spread like butter on the bread.  Rayla was impressed with the flavor and how the pieces of garlic were not overpowering.

When the potato pancakes came, Rayla could smell the spice but trusted the server had not led her astray, eyeing her glass of Thai iced tea just in case.  One bite and she was in heaven.  The cheese and the heat from the chili only enhanced the potato flavor as did the light smattering of soy sauce and vinegar-based sauce.  Rayla almost ignored Ms. Danvers when the pasta came, inhaling the dish.  At the end of the meal, once the excellent cheesecake had been finished, Rayla was in love with the food.  “Well, Ms. Danvers, I suppose I should be thanking you for introducing me to my new favorite restaurant.”

Ms. Danvers chuckled.  “It’s good, isn’t it?”

“I would marry the chef in a heartbeat if I got to eat like this every day for the rest of my life.”

-----------------------------

Rayla brought all her clients and her coworkers to Sarai’s Place in the following months.  She tried almost everything on the menu, though she was still mildly terrified of the spiciness of the laksa if the smell alone was anything to go by.  Every Monday and Thursday, she got take-away and ordered the dessert whenever she ate in on Saturdays.  She was thankful she was single or else she would have to come here every week with someone and she liked dining alone in the quiet restaurant.

Sometimes, they played classical music, other times K-pop, and Rayla would always remember the night they had played an opera medley when several people with the Katolis Opera Company had dined that night.  The chef seemed keenly aware of who came to his restaurants at what dates and times and played music to fit their tastes but also made sense with the theme.

It was a popular spot with not only Foodies and high school kids, but a lot of Asian-Americans dined there.  Rayla had looked up the reviews and had seen it was highly recommended by the Katolis Korean and Thai communities, the Katolis restaurant circles, and the Commission for the Promotion of Local Ingredients and Farmer’s Markets.  No one said anything bad about Sarai’s Place without at least ten people defending the restaurant’s choices.

And now Rayla was sitting with her boss, Ahling Patel, and having to stop herself from inhaling the food in front of her.  The risotto was so satisfying and paired with chicken breast stuffed with kimchi, perilla, and ricotta.  “What do you think, Mr. Ahling?”

“It’s delicious.  I’ve always felt that fusion was a gimmick, but I’m sold by this young man’s food.  Young lady,” Ahling called the server, smiling good-naturedly when she nodded at him and finished up with her current customer.  When she came up to their table, she greeted them again.  “Is there anyway we can speak to the chef?”

The server blinked before nodding.  “I’m sure I can arrange it.  Dinner service is almost over and there are only you and two other tables.  Can I bring you dessert while I’m talking to him?”

“What do you recommend?”

“Our pastry chef made yakgwa, which are little honey pastries made with pine nuts, ginger, and sesame oil and they also made a yuja polenta cake and a play on Italian lemon cake, but with yuja.”

Rayla ordered the yakgwa and Ahling got the polenta cake and waited for the news.  Rayla couldn’t recall having ever seen the chef even though she came there at least twice a week, closer to three.  She hadn’t seen any pictures of him, either, surprisingly enough.  He was said to keep to himself and shunned the limelight, which is why he never made TV appearances.

A few minutes later, it wasn’t their server, but a man who looked be about 26 arriving with their desserts.  His green eyes were striking, as were his cheekbones and sharp jawline.  He gave them both an awkward smile as Rayla noticed his ring finger was bare and didn’t seem to have a tan line.  Was this the chef?  His coat would seem to say so.  “Nice to meet you both.  I’m Callum Evans, the owner and executive chef here at Sarai’s Place.”

Ahling smiled.  “It’s nice to meet you, young man.  I’m Ahling Patel and this is my employee, Rayla Burrows.”  Rayla nodded her head in acknowledgement.  “Your food is delicious.  How on Earth do you even think of this?”

The young man flushed, looking down at his feet.  “Um, I’m not that special.  Many people before me found that Korean and Italian food go well together.  Most of my recipes are riffs on family recipes and all my Thai dishes are family recipes.  I was originally going to go traditional Korean or Thai but there were no fusion places in the area and I’m part Irish and German on top of being a quarter-Thai and a quarter-Korean.  It felt…right, I guess.  I’m mixed and grew up with a variety of food cultures in my house, so why not do fusion?  Korean and Italian just made the most sense, so…”  He looked embarrassed at the praise, rubbing the back of his neck.

Rayla leaned forward a bit.  “I’ve eaten here at least twice week for the past six months.  I can tell you, without a doubt, it’s my favorite place to eat.”

“Thank you.”

Ahling cleared his throat.  “Are you single, Mr. Evans?”

Callum flushed even deeper.  “Ah.  Yes.  Being a chef requires long hours and running a restraint requires even more.”

“You need a good partner to help you find balance in your life!”

Rayla remained quiet as she watched them talk.  The only thing going through her mind was ‘I’m going to marry this man for his food.  I’ll eat well for the rest of my life.’  She stayed when Ahling said good night and while the restaurant emptied out.  Callum stayed at the table, fidgeting under her gaze.  “Is there anything else I can help you with?”

“A date.”

Callum blinked.  “We have a sticky rice made with dates-”

“No.  A romantic excursion.  An outing.”

He gulped, looking her up and down.  “A date?  Really?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“Because I fell in love with your food almost immediately after I tasted it and would like the chance to know the man who cooks it.”

Callum blushed.  “OK.”  They exchanged info and Rayla smirked as she left with his number in her cellphone.  There was no way she would be letting this one go.

------------------------------------------

After four months of dating, Rayla could confidently say that she was now just as in love with Callum the man as she was with his cooking.  Learning that his restaurant was named after his mother who died when he was in high school had endeared him to her, as had the knowledge that all the art on the walls were his paintings.  Was there anything he couldn’t do?

They were currently in Callum’s kitchen, him developing a new recipe while Rayla took down notes for him.  Even on his days off, he was always thinking about what he would do next and Rayla admired his passion to his craft.  When he brought her up to try the dish, she groaned.  “I will marry this man if it’s the last thing I do,” she muttered.

“I can hear you, you know,” Callum chuckled.

Rayla raised a brow.  “Then why haven’t you accepted my proposal?”

“Because you proposed to my food?”

“I hardly see the difference.”  Callum laughed at her, shaking his head.  “Hey, move in with me.”

“We’ve been together for four months.”

“Is that a problem?  Too short?”

Callum stared at her.  “You’re serious.”

“I told you; I fully plan on marrying you to eat your cooking ‘til the day I die.”

“So, it’s my cooking you love?”

“When have I hidden this?”  Rayla reached for his hand, pulling him closer.  “I’m serious.  Move in with me.”

“Why?”

Rayla shrugged.  “I’m happy when we wake up next to each other.  I like the idea of coming home to you or you coming home to me.  I don’t like sleeping alone, and, for the past month, the two of us have been alternating sleeping at each other’s places and it doesn’t make sense to pay rent on two places when we could be happy together?”

“That and I’m the only person willing to put up with your stubborn ass.”

Rayla gave him a mock offended looking, giving his arm a playful smack.  “You love my stubborn ass.”

“I do.”  Callum leaned down and captured her lips, letting her taste the dish he had been working on for the past hour.  When they pulled apart, he looked down into her eyes with his bright green ones.  “I think I love you.”

“That’s good, because I think I love you, too.”

Rayla would take that for now.  And in two years, when she would be standing next to him in front of their new house, matching rings on their fingers, and a very pregnant belly, she would remind him that he had his food to thank for their relationship.  “I fell in love with your food first.”

“I’m glad you did, because you kept coming back.”

“Lucky you.”

“Lucky me.”        

#moonbase fanfics #rayllum #rayllum fanfic #the dragon prince #au #love at first bite #this was just for fun

[imo-chan-imagines]

『 Haikyuu!! Week 2020 | Day 3 』

· Sept. 27th → Irresistible Force ·

Characters: Karasuno team

Prompts: A. favourite team + B. crossover/AU

Tags/warnings: Haikyuu!! (anime), PG, fluff, crack, a teensy bit of angst (because who doesn't love a sad superhero backstory), headcanons, AU, superheroes, HaikyuuWeek2020

A/N: Again, I love all the teams and didn't want to pick, but life is cruel, so here I am. This is headcanons about my fav team (Karasuno) in an AU (superheroes). I was thinking of a Hero Association, kind of like in 'The Boys'? But less corrupt... Maybe more like in 'One Punch'? I think you get me.

All of my Haikyuu Week 2020 posts will be SFW, but I have NFSW content on my blog if that butters your biscuit. Feel free to check it out! Thanks for reading! Please enjoy ♡ Imo~

Karasuno / Superhero Association AU

×

☆ Sawamura Daichi ☆

Powers: nigh invulnerability, super strength, enhanced healing

If he's not the ordinary cop that somehow befriends the heroes I was tempted then he's definitely the leader of the superhero group

Kind of like Superman in the old-school Justice League, just not as OP lol

Looks damn good is spandex those thighs *sweats*

Cape!! so ✨majestic✨

Probably wears dark-ish, neutral colours with a dash of blue

A bit serious. Not the kind of hero to go around making quips all the time, but will make light of his own suffering like Captain America

Takes younger heroes under his wing like the true Dadchi he is

Strong moral compass. Unbreakable

Won't hesitate to lay down his life for others

Who am I kidding. He's basically Captain America with a cape

Poster-boy for the Hero Association

×

☆ Sugawara Koushi ☆

Powers: telekinesis

A soft, pearly aesthetic with his suit, hair and skin. Lots of white and silver

A favourite among the ladies he's just too pretty, damm it T T

Very plucky and adorable

People in the vicinity will literally faint when he goes all serious to concentrate and use his powers

Has a duo move with Daichi where he literally throws him like a missle YEET

Has the most followers on Twitter and TikTok and his fans can be pretty nuts

Has a perfume line named after him and models for the adverts

Will smile like an angel right before bringing a building down on top of you fuck, I find this one really funny

×

☆ Azumane Asahi ☆

Powers: regeneration, enhanced stength

Kind of like Wolverine or Deapool but, like, much, much softer on the inside uwu

Wears green and black

Messed up big time back in the day and dropped off the grid out of guilt some people died :(

Was convinced to come back when his old teammates finally found him again because they needed his help in a crisis

Literally shed tears of relief when heroes and citizens alike welcomed him back instead of hating him mah heart *sniffs*

Can withstand seemingly anything and fully heal within a matter of days

Doesn't know the full extent of his powers himself. How exactly do one test it? 🤔

Still has to psych himself up for a fight, though big softy, really

×

☆ Shimizu Kiyoko ☆

Powers: electrokinesis, flight

Powers like Storm from X-Men, and kicks ass like Wonder Woman

Refuses to wear a revealing suit, but looks bomb af anyway

Kiyoko = absolute queen

One of the most powerful heroes, but doesn't throw her weight around unless she's kicking bady-guy booty

Stella gynamast, and has mastered several martial arts

Can literally throw a guy three times her size, all without any strength powers Tanaka: 👁👄👁

Somehow has perfect hair all the time secret superpower??

Is active on the political stage as a human rights activist, headlining women's rights yes, yes yes

Will strike you with lightning for sexual harassment

Comes up with really good mission plans

Is a soothing balm for Tanaka when he loses it

Black and gold aesthetic✨

Asymmetrical cape! super fashionable

Poster-girl for the Hero Association

☆ Tanaka Ryuunosuke ☆

Powers: fire generation and manipulation

Tanaka brings the heat literally

A bit of a chaotic-good, but what's new there?

Can get out of control if he loses his focus, so his friends have to keep him grounded Kiyoko is a literal angel when that happens

Kiyoko: Sun's getting real low...

Bonus points if you get the reference

Is terrified of hurting innocents if he gets out of control

It rarely happens, but if he loses his self confidence, his powers don't seem to work

Shouts cringy lines at the villains before roasting their asses lmfao

Wears a black and orange flame-retardant suit, and actually looks pretty fine in it 😌👌

Literally head over heels for Kiyoko just imagine it. Biggest hype man

×

☆ Nishinoya Yuu ☆

Powers: animal metamorphosis, enhanced speed

Think Beast Boy from 'Teen Titans', but less green he's more likely to be yellow or orange, lmao

Handy in lots of different situations. Very versatile

Incredibly cheeky and joins in with Tanaka's cheesy jokes and one-liners

Absolute maniac, but the people love him, especially schoolkids lmao

Has his own energy drink flavour, and he's STOKED about it

Yellow and black suit, kind of like his hair

Has a surprisingly large following of fans

Laps up the attention, but it doesn't really go to his head

Quiet and serious when he's on a mission/fighting

☆ Hinata Shouyou ☆

Powers: self replication, super speed, levitation

His powers took a while to properly manifest, which left him feeling isolated as a teen

Was pretty lost until Ukai helped train him

Got into a fight with Kageyama in an alleyway when he first met him MET HIM IN THE STREET, LMAO

Argues with Kageyama a lot at headquarters, but they work together like a dream when taking down bad guys

Has a heart of literal gold precious baby

Is contantly amazed when he helps significantly

Was inspired to become a hero by his idol, the Little Giant and it's his dream to inspire someone else 😭😭

Uses his replication ability to confuse the bad guys ULTIMATE DECOY

Levitates around the room when he's excited like Aang from ATLA, hahaha

Wears an orange, white and yellow suit with little wings on his heels cuuuute

×

☆ Kageyama Tobio ☆

Powers: water/ice generation and manipulation, breathing underwater, superhuman reflexes

I was tempted to give him fire/ice powers like Todoroki, but I didn't want to detract from Tanaka

Has problems focusing his powers, and can be quite turbulent in the heat of battle

Finds it hard to work well with others initially, but really makes an effort

Has hurt people close to him by accident before and never wants to do it again it would tear him apart

Becomes a power duo with Hinata when Ukai helps train them, even though they don't seem to get on well at first

Broody boi on the surface, but a cinnamon roll deep down

Wears a dark blue and deep purple suit that has fins to assist in underwater escapades which are his forte

Freezes Hinata's feet to the floor when he pisses him off or anybody's feet, tbh

Can dodge almost anything because of his reflexes don't ever try to punch him. You'll look stupid

Is surprised by the number of people in his fan club especially the number of women asking to marry him??

×

☆ Tsukishima Kei ☆

Powers: telepathy, superhuman intellect, mind control on weak-willed individuals

Prefers to outwit his enemies rather than getting into a brawl

But his self-designed gadgets and tech help him out if he has to a bit like Tony Stark, wink wonk

Sometimes makes you question if he's really a hero or not Tsukki, please

Doesn't take orders well

Baits villains by insulting them and getting the better of them with his words it's hilarious

Comes up with good plans, but improvises well with whatever he's got

Probably wears suits over his spandex most of the time fancy shmancy

Is prepared to die to protect Yamaguchi waahhh

×

☆ Yamaguchi Tadashi ☆

Powers: invisibility, force fields, teleportation

Susan Storm with added teleportation, lol

Often finds it hard to value his powers because they're not as visually strong and impressive as other people's

Rather than squaring up to a battle, he often has to 'hide' from it by literally going invisible

But he gradually becomes aware of how vital his powers can be, and learns to control them and make them as advantageous as possible

Is a highly important and valued member of the team

Soft bean that gets nervous and throws up before a fight

But he's hella determined and won't back down

Honestly, just wants to protect Tsukki and make him proud PROTECT HIM

×

☆ Yachi Hitoka ☆

Powers: size manipulation

She can shrink and enlarge herself and objects she touches at will, including other people

Sometimes shrinks really small to avoid social situations she doesn't want to be in samez, honey

The clumsiest and least experienced on the team

But she tries her best, gradually getting to grips with her powers

Sometimes uses her powers by accident, like when she's nervous

Once touched a watermelon slice on the refreshment table and accidentally blew it up to the size of a car Hinata, Kageyama and Noya fully dug in with their faces 😭😭

Nearly passed out when Daichi, the literal god of the Hero Association, told her she had great potential

Don't worry, Yams teleported and caught her

☆ Ukai Keishin ☆

Powers: laser vision, metal mimicry

The has-been hero who lost his enthusiasm for hero-ing and retired some years ago

Was really cool back in his hayday. Big hot-shot with a fan club

Has been working as a convenience store attendant to pay the bills and is bored out of his mind but refuses to admit it

Was convinced to get back in the game when he found Hinata and Kageyama fighting, both struggling with their abilities. He broke up the fight and agreed to coach them

Doesn't do much of the flashy hero stuff anymore, but will occasionally get stuck in when he's needed must protecc his children

Is only, like, ten years older than the other heroes, but they treat him like some fossilised sensei out of Natuto, or some shit

Tbf, he has the back problems of one 😭😭

×

☆ Takeda Ittetsu ☆

Powers: power absorption

Transferred from being a hero to hero management after having having issues with the effects of his powers he has a conscience :(

He felt guilty and responsible for permanently taking the powers of others, even if they were criminals

It was like removing a piece of their souls it kind of broke him

These days, he makes sure nobody knows about his powers, so it can't be used against him

He helps in any other way possible

He would only use his powers again in dire circumstances he knows he'll eventually have to

Is generally chipper and good natured, though

If he was ever captured by a villain, they'd probably send him back because he talks too much omg, hahaha

Helps gather info for the team and direct them on missions and in fights

Gives bomb inspirational speeches ✊

© imo-chan-imagines 2020

#imo chan imagines #haikyuuweek2020 #karasuno #haikyuu!! #hq! #headcanons #haikyuu headcanons #sawamura daichi #sugawara koushi #azumane asahi #shimizu kiyoko #tanaka ryuunosuke #nishinoya yuu #hinata shouyou #kageyama tobio #tsukishima kei #yamaguchi tadashi #yachi hitoka #ukai keishin #takeda ittestu

[dangerouseggwolfangel]

I got all the new spirits and... I know this is old news and all but... I can't thank Sakurai enough for what he has done with this game and with the spirits. I understand the people who miss the trophies, they were really cool.

But the sheer amount of characters you can actually put into the game by using existing art and all the lovely references that the developers put into the spirit battles are so much cooler than what the trophy and the stickers were. Okay, trophies have nice descriptions which makes them more useful for people that are unfamiliar with the characters. But for people that are familiar with the characters, nothing beats KNOWING why the Aerith spirit battle is at the Fountain of Dreams and Cloud is trying to protect her. Nothing beats knowing why the Cait Sith spirit battle has 3 Mr. Game & Watch spamming Judge. Even if you got the plot of FFVII spoiled you won't get the reference. You need to play the actual game.

The part that really warms my heart is that Sakurai didn't need to try so hard to make bonus battles that are so perfect for the characters. He didn't need to constantly update the game with more spirits and he certainly didn't need to give us so many. Most people would have been 100% satisfied with just the playable characters from 7. But no, he gave us Shiva, who was sadly missing from the game despite being the most popular summon (or is Bahamut more popular?). He gave us the Turks. They have many fans, sure but not enough to get in Kingdom Hearts or Dissidia apperently, so nobody would have been surprised if they were skipped.

Elena (or Irina if you are japanese) is one of my favorite characters ever, and my first videogame crush. And she is now in the best game of all time. This really feels like a Chistmas gift from Sakurai. I am so happy. I was so happy when Shantae was a spirit at launch. I was so happy when Igor from Persona was added as a spirit, when Leon S. Kennedy from RE4 was added (and his Spirit Battle references that game perfectly too), when Sans got a costume, when music from the Metal Slug games got in with Terry.

I understand that Smash hype and discourse will always be about playable characters, but sometimes we all really need to take a minute to appreciate all that Smash Ultimate is OUTSIDE its massive roster. I am mostly a fan of minor characters who have no realistic chance of getting in the game at all, which is why I mostly give support to characters who wouldn't make me cry tears of joy, or would become my mains, but have a good chance of bringing with them spirits (or background characters if Sakurai pulls another Terry) that would make me so happy.

Ryu Hayabusa, a pretty boring ninja if you ask me, but one of the most important recurring characters in Ninja Gaiden is my beloved Ayane who would get in as a spirit, so come on Ryu supporters WE GOTTA MAKE HIM HAPPEN!

Someone from Soul Calibur? Sure, anything to get a Voldo spirit.

Someone from Tekken? I love Xiaoyu, King, Yoshimitsu, Nina, Anna and Paul so fricking much, and at least a couple of them are guaranteed if we get Jin or something.

Crash Bandicoot? YES! A Cortex spirit would be the best.

Sora? Only worth it for the Roxas spirit.

Byleth? Not my first choice, but I don't get all the people who are mad because they wanted the house leaders. I'm too busy smiling because the house leaders got wondeful spirit battles (and also Seteth for some reason).

When smash speculation and wishlists are involed, you guys seem to care about who gets in as a playable character, the bonus stuff you don't care about (unless it's missing, like FF music until now. Then you suddenly care). I care about the bonus content and who gets in as playable matters just a little bit to me. Which makes me weird. But to me the spirits are what makes Smash Ultimate the best smash game and I'm willing to die on this hill.

Imagine being a Mallow fan. Barely anyone discusses or even remembers him. Everyone goes nuts about that stupid puppet who is literally just as important as your Mallow but he gets to appear in cameos and stuff, while Mallow is left in the dust. Then Ultimate comes out and Mallow is a spirit. It's not a Geno & Mallow spirit, Geno doesn't get to intrude in anyway. It's just a simple spirit battle who references your favorite game. A little detail. But you have never felt so seen and cared for as a Mallow fan.

The devil is in the details, and the masterpiece is in the details too. If Smash Ultimate had exactly the same roster, with the same gameplay, but no care and love for details in the background, in the victory screens and its approach to single player content was more on the level of Smash 4...

It would still be an 8.5/10 game at minimum, but it would also be so much worse at what its trying to do.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that it's been two years and Smash Ultimate is still such a beautiful game that keeps being given attention and players keep going back to it not just because it's a really pretty games with good gameplay mechanics. But because every inch of it has been crafted with love, care and attention to details.

You can have the best gameplay, and the nicest graphics but if you don't care to put all your passion into polishing your game as much as possible nobody will care (coughcoughMarvelVsCapcomInfinitecough)

#super smash bros #super smash bros ultimate #final fantasy vii #smash trophies #smash spirits #sephiroth smash bros #ff7 #ff7 turks #can you tell that I'm really enjoying the DLC? #the final fantasy stuff was the only thing that didn't feel polished in this game #now the game is perfect #Sakurai the madlad even fixed the Cloud spirit with actual FF7 artwork #and I guess this screenshot is how you'll find out I'm italian

[fireproofheart]

Endgame Speculation

So I accidentally wrote a three page essay.

Tldr:

Caleb is consecuted,

the city(tm) is full of evil mages doing blood sport who want to unlease the chained oblivion,

Molly and Lucien are totally separate souls,

The empire knows more than it should about the beacons and the city

Ok so I decided about ten years ago that the astral city was actually where the souls that are stored in the beacon exist while they’re waiting to be reborn. Initially, I’d thought that they’d find Molly there, but clearly his body is already up and running. Anyways I think the city is some kind of phantasmal double of Aeor that they created to store the souls of mages who had reached umavi. Now I know there’s been lots of talk of a god killing weapon, but what if it’s that all these super powerful mages souls are in the city waiting to be unleashed. And then if you take to alpha and alpha to be a reference to the rebirth cycle (I go into that in this post) “We trek 'til homeward bound we be” makes sense as something like we drag ourselves through life after life through the rebirth cycle until we reach enlightenment and head back to the city and I think Lucien has figured this out, but Vess hadn’t (remember she was so close to figuring out the book).

I also think it’d be fun if the mages do actually have a god killing weapon up there but what they have is that they think they’ll be able to control the chained oblivion (I don’t think they actually can) but like what if they want to set it free so that it will destroy the divine gate and go kill a bunch of gods so that they can ascend? They might not even think that they can control it, they might just be banking on becoming gods and being able to defeat it.

So like what if there’s all this talk about umavi and perfecting your soul in the Dynasty, but that’s not it at all. What if it’s actually go through lives until you get powerful enough that the mages in the city are like oh hey come on in. We also know sometimes if you go through too many of these cycles you can go nuts. So like I wonder if the black city mages are just nerfing people who get too powerful and who aren’t good candidates to join them, or if they’re like trying to shape a world they want to come back to.

Like maybe ‘umavi’ is really just a shitty club running around hunting shit, like Halas had dreadnaught chained up in his basement essentially and also was messing around with using astral projection to achieve immortality, so why wouldn’t other mages be doing similar bullshit? We know something related to the city is hunting through the planes like Vokodo was Terrified. And if these beings are so enlightened why would they be sitting on top of like some kind of literal hell and engaging in blood sport??  Also what if the wizards knew it would be a hell city so they're all asleep and everyone who wasnt prepared to go is having a miserable time being hunted through an otherwise empty city? And this also works with Matt’s themes about false gods and blind faith!!

So, If we follow the line of thought about the city, it makes sense that the beacons are ancient Zemnian artifacts, created by the mages to ensure their immortal life. Halas was obsessed with immortality, so I think this tracks. I also have a suspicion that nine eyes is related to the governing structure that the mages used pre-calamity, possibly like a Cerberus Assembly type deal, like one for every school of magic.

Anyways! I think at least one of the assembly members possibly more have figured that out and that’s what they’re actually trying to do with the beacon. I think that initially, the assembly thought that the beacon was the ancient weapon, but I think they’ve realized it isn’t. So I think Trent is trying to recreate the consecution process so that they can continue using the rebirth cycle. That man has made some weird comments that hint about immortality, like how he doesn’t ever plan to leave his office, how he wants caleb to kill him etc. I think this raises the possibility that he’s already figured out consecution I also think it’s an interesting possibility that Trent himself is consecuted and has the memories of a pre calamity wizard, but probably the only way that’s possible is if he wasn’t that powerful, otherwise he’d know all these secrets the Empire is trying to decode.

I think what he is doing is looking for Zemnian kids who might be consecuted souls. We all know Trent loves to fuck with memories, he does this shit constantly. So he’s picking up kids he thinks might be cycling souls and trying to extract or trigger their memories while he trains them to be loyal to the empire, so he can command some real powerful mages. I think it’s also very possible that some of the experiments he ran on them were to try and discover or recreate this consecution process. We know he was up to some Bullshit, but not what exactly. We also know that he’s doing all this when they’re teenagers, which is when their memories are supposed to be returning.  

My guess is that only Caleb is actually one of the souls from the city. Also it’d be super fun if he was the soul of Mr. Destruction council member because I think that’d be a fun motive for Trent to be beating destruction magic into him (aside from the practicalities of course). But if Caleb is consecuted, it explains his dream when he slept near the beacon. Where he saw a dark sphere, which I think was the city, and multiple versions of himself. Matt  also  particularly said there were 17 selves which is a high number of rebirths (the bright queen has like 8 and shes starting to lose it) which goes to my theory that he has a super powerful soul. Also aligns with Trent telling him that ‘he has unlimited potential, unlike Astrid and Eodwulf’. And another thing he saw which tends to get overlooked, is a flame and when he looked at it, it felt familiar and overwhelming and he had to stop focusing on it bc he could feel all of his selves pulling at him. Which brings me to my next point.

Trent said that he traumatized Caleb to help him grow and that man basically never lies, he just talks around the truth. He also said that he thinks Caleb could be an assembly member and that other assembly members have been through similar situations. In the Dynasty, the memories don’t come back automatically, it’s just little flashes and then you have to have someone train you to remember your past lives. But the Empire doesn’t know about that process bc its super secret, so they have this other one that uses trauma to trigger the memories.

So I have two thoughts, one that maybe this works for some of the other souls that have gone through it, but if Caleb is one of the Pre Calamity assembly members who had reached a state of ‘umavi’, there was too much information coming through and his mind broke. And now he can’t access those memories at all, not because they’re magically supressed, but because they’re too wrapped up in his trauma. He started freaking out a bit in the dream when he felt the souls pull at him and looked into the fire and I think until he deals with allll that, he’s not going to be able to remember, if he ever can.

Or! I think it’s also possible If his soul was up there in the party part of the city and was like oh hi I don’t feel like hunting people for spORt anymore and got reborn on purpose and actively doesn’t want to remember.  Who really knows.

But if this is the case and Trent was trying to run that process, it would also makes sense as to why he would keep Caleb around for that long in the asylum if he was still trying to dig them memories out. If the second possibility is right it also provides an interesting possibility that the woman in the asylum went nuts when she healed his mind, because if she tried to heal the second part and his soul was actively resisting and lashed out… like heyooo. Caleb being secretly super powerful and evil in his soul, but choosing to act against that also is a nice tie in with the themes around identity that we’ve seen so far.

Where do Vess and Lucien come into this?

I think Vess is trying to release the souls from the city and hadn’t quite figured out how. I think that she used Lucien as a test run for being the nonagon and sent his soul to the astral plane to go into the city using the book and then as part of the ritual, cut the tether to his body so he could go off and do whatever. So it tracks that he killed Vess if he thought that she tried to kill him/did kill him/didn’t tell him that he could die or whatever. It also wouldn’t surprise me if she was prepared to be the nonagon herself even at that point, but wanted to use Lucien because the risk of death was so high.

So anyways, the ritual failed technically, because an ‘umavi’ mage didn’t pop into Lucien’s body to come tell her how to release the souls (possibly by unleashing the chained oblivion lmao) When you cut someone’s tether, they die instantly so I think she did that, a soul didn’t appear and she went fuck ok so that didn’t work. They tried to resurrect him, didn’t work, so they left. But I think the ritual did work in a way. I think they called a soul from the city, just not the one they  wanted and it took longer than they’d expected.

So Molly wakes up, has no memories of this nonsense, because as he said the entire time he was alive, whoever he was before isn’t him. And if the souls can’t interact with other souls there and they think it’s an empty hell city what if that’s why Molly came back saying empty because that’s how it seemed to him??

So Lucien accidentally gets stuck wandering around with all the other trapped souls. And what if that speaks to Lucien’s motivation to try and bring them all back. Like he’s been wandering around the shitty part of the city for years while Molly was up and running and the black city mages have promised him that he won’t have to go back there if he brings them back to the material plane. So I think Lucien mostly knows how to do this and like maybe needs that book for the technicalities, but I also think he’s going to Aeor to go find another beacon to use for the ritual. And obvi when Kree resurrected Lucien, he actually came back this time because his soul was willing and Molly’s wasn’t.

So I think Vess was trying to figure out how the ritual had failed, but I think after the nein told her about Molly and shit, she’s probably figured out that really the only piece she was missing was how to get the soul she wanted.  I think that missing piece is probably a beacon and that you could possibly use them to communicate in a way or draw the specific souls from the city. But I think it took her too long to figure it out because the beacons are super important to the peace effort, and I don’t think she’d be able to sneak off with one right now, so I think she was going to Aeor hoping to find another one. I think if she had, she would have become a vessel for an umavi mage and she would have learned how to bring back the city and I think right now, we’re in danger of Lucien doing exactly that.

My final point is that a lot of people have been saying it feels like we’re getting into the endgame of the campaign with the stuff that’s happening now. I agree. I also think it would be very tidy if Matt had wrapped Molly and Caleb’s story arcs around each other to end the campaign. Also having them defeat the literal past, the assembly and possibly a god would be a baller way to end it.

#critical role #critical role speculation #critical role conspiracy theory #cr speculation #cr meta #meta #cr conspiracy theories #caleb widogast #mollymauk tealeaf #vess derogna #trent ikithon #the astral sea #cr spoilers #c2e114 #me #criticalrole #critrole #c2 #end spec #caleb #molly #vess #lucien #npc2

[chubbymoongoddess]

Minjoon|| Hybrid AU||

    The day had started out dreary for Namjoon. The sky was filled with dark rain clouds and it had been pouring since he had woken up. With a sigh, he had rolled out of bed and made his way to the bathroom to brush his teeth before he got dressed for work. Upon checking the time, he realized he was running a little late so he decided to skip breakfast and instead grabbed his keys, umbrella and suitcase and left his home, making his way as fast as he could to work. Thankfully, he had made it with just a few minutes to spare, causing him to release a deep sigh he had been holding in since he left his house. He already knew this was going to be a long day.

  Unfortunately for Namjoon, the day was in fact, a long one. Meeting after meeting was attended and frankly, he had a migraine because of them. So, he quickly packed up his things, say his goodbyes to his  coworkers for the day and headed out of the office. 

  “At least the rain stopped.” He thought.

    Taking his usual route home, the tall, young man sighed once more. Maybe he’d stop to get something to eat on the way home? That way he could take a shower as soon as he got home and then crawl into bed for the rest of the night. Maybe he’d even read a little before he passed out. His thoughts were quickly interupped by a weak crying noise coming from the alley he was passing.

   Now, Namjoon usually didn’t pay any heed to strange noises like this. He’d usually keep walking. But this? This cry? Sounded like something or someone needed help. It sounded pained. So, carefully, Namjoon made his way down the alley, peeking around trash bins and dumpsters to see if he could find what was making the noise. The closer he got, the louder the crying got. It was behind a few large boxes that Namjoon finally found what has been crying.

  A small samyoyed hybrid, curled in on himself and whimpering, peeking up at Namjoon once he moved the boxes. Wait.. a hybrid? Those were rare and you were lucky if you were even able to get a glimpse of one walking around the city, so why was there one abandoned like this in an alley? It was unfortunately still pouring, but Namjoon didn’t want to startle the poor hybrid so, he carefully moved the boxes to the side and crouched down, offering his hand, palm down to the pup.

  “Hey there. I’m Namjoon.. what are you doing out here all alone, little one?”

   The hybrid’s eyes widened slightly, though he tentatively sniffed and nosed at the taller man’s hand.  

“M’Jimin..” He mumbled softly. “Owner didnt want me anymore.. Was called useless and dropped off here so I-”

 Jimin’s eyes filled with tears at the thought of being abandoned and how long he had been living in that alley. How long he’s had to go without food. Namjoon, upon hearing the hybrid’s voice quivering, calming tried to sooth him, hand reaching out to pet gently through his blond hair. He doesn’t know what compelled him to say his next words or what he was even thinking, but this hybrid was way underweight. His face was gaunt and he was sure that he’d be able to see his ribs if he were to take his tattered shirt off.

  “Do you want to come and live with me? I can take care of you, I promise you’ll never have to worry about living on the street again.”

  It took Jimin a few moments to think it over but, this man seemed genuine. There wasn’t a bad smell or ill intention coming from him. So, after a minute or two of thinking, the hybrid reached a shaky, thin hand out to the taller man, accepting his offer of a new home.

--------------------

    It had been a few months since Namjoon had brought Jimin home. For a few weeks it was going well. He had Jimin eating his special hybrid food, had made him up his own room in one of Namjoon’s spare bedrooms and had grown closer with the smaller man and on top of that, Jimin had filled out to a healthier weight. No longer was he able to see the samyoyed’s ribs. His cheeks had filled out beautifully as well. That is, until Jimin had begged to try a little piece of Namjoon’s steak one night and it had gone downhill from there.

   After that, Jimin refused to eat his own food and begged Namjoon to let him eat human food too and how could he resist with Jimin pouting at him like that? So, from then on, Jimin ate the same things as Namjoon did. Now, human food wasn’t meant for hybrids to eat. It caused them to gain weight rather quickly which, is what happened to Jimin.

 The clothes that Namjoon had boughten him were slowly getting way too tight, his chubby, swollen tummy pushing against the fabric of his shirts. His ass has started swelling out more as well, causing his pants to be uncomfortably tight on him and not to mention he was now sporting a softer chest, not quite moobs but a few more weaks of eating would fix that. Jimin’s cheeks had gotten chubbier as well as his thighs and arms, not that he himself minded. He was more worried about what Namjoon would say to him.

  Along with Jimin’s expanding waistline, his apetite also grew. He used to be stuffed after half a plate of food but now he was having Namjoon make him at least two. Three on a day he was super hungry. This worried the older male and since he didn’t want to hurt Jimin’s feelings with bringing up his new found hunger and weight, he dicided to just stay quiet about it. Besides, Jimin looked happy and healthy right? He himself was beginning to enjoy watching him grow softer too. A few more pounds couldn’t hurt, right?

  Wrong. The more time that passed, the more Jimin ate and snacked and the bigger he got. He had gotten used to being pampered by Namjoon, to the point of getting whiny if he didn’t get his way. He’d stomp his foot and cross his arms, causing his belly to jiggle and sway. “Hyung I said I’m hungy! Please! I’m gonna die!” Namjoon would just sigh and get him his food so he’d stop pouting. It eventually got to the point where Namjoon had to make more that one trip a day to the grocery store because Jimin would clean them out of everything within a few hours.

-------------------

 Over the next few years, Jimin’s eating habits continued as well as his weight gain. It had gotten to the point where Namjoon needed to help him out of bed in the mornings as he couldn’t do it himself. Was the hybrid embarrassed by this? Not at all. He enjoyed it. Enjoyed the fact that he had to have his Joonie’s help for the simplest tasks. He enjoyed his owner turned boyfriend giving him all of the attention in the world when he got home from work. He reveled in all of the belly rubs and touched Namjoon would give him, enjoyed every single kiss and not once did the older male ever critisize Jimin’s weight or how much he ate... alright, except for the times where Jimin goes on binges and eats everything in the house, but he can’t help it!

  It’s not like Namjoon doesn’t enjoy it anyway. Whenever Jimin cleans out the kitchen and he can’t move, he begs and whines for the older man to rub his belly, to which, he happily obliges. Namjoon especially loves it when Jimin rolls over him when they’re sleeping and he get’s pinned under Jimin’s enormous gut and the mattress. Jimin always profusely apologizes in the morning, but Namjoon is never angry with him. How could he be?

  Unfortunately today, Namjoon has to work. He’s got an important meeting that he absolutely cannot be late for and as much as he wants to stay home and love on his massive, jiggly boyfriend, he can’t. While he straightens his tie, he peeks over at Jimin, humming softly.

    “Angel, can you try your best not to eat everything in the kitchen for me today? Just until I get home? If you’re good for me I’ll make sure to buy you extra treats when I go back out to the store.”

   Jimin huffs and pouts at this, but the promise of extra treats has him willing to try. With a small nod and another little whine, he agrees.

 “Okay but, you gotta promise you’ll get the extra treat! You know it’s really hard for me to not eat.”

 Namjoon chuckles and makes his way over to lean over, giving the hybrid a few kisses on his puffy cheeks and giving a small pat to his belly, making it wobble slightly.

  “Of course I promise, love. Now, I have to get going, I’ll see you in a few hours, okay?”

   With a kiss to the lips and another tummy pat, Namjoon made his way to the front door, making sure to lock it behind him once he stepped out of the house. As soon as that lock clicked, Jimin wasted no time in pushing himself up out of the chair he was sitting in. It took him a few minutes and the chair creacked under him, due to his mass and how much he was struggling, but he made it. He waddled himself into the kitchen to see that Namjoon haid labeled the food he was allowed to eat until he got home which to other people, would be enough for a small family for four but to Jimin it was nowhere near enough to last him that long.

  A long whine escaped his puffy lips. He hated this but he was willing to try and be good so, he took the food labeled for breakfast to the table and carefully sat down on one of the chairs there. It creaked dangerously under his weight but the hybrid didn’t care one bit. His stomach rumbled as he dug into his food with fervor. You’d think with the way Jimin ate, he’d make a mess of himself, but he made sure he didn’t waste one little bit of his food. It had only taken him ten minutes to scarf everything down, leaving only a few dirty plates behind.

   Damn he really should have paced himself. With the way Namjoon had laid things out, his snack before luch was still two hours away. He was going to go nuts.. Unless.. what if he just ate a few things from his snack plates? That wouldn’t hurt, right? Grabbing onto the edge of the table, Jimin hauled himself up once more, this time, dragging the chair to the fridge so he didn’t have to keep getting up and down. That was a pain.

  Carefully opening the refridgerator door once more, he sat back down in his chair, it once again creaking in agony and once again, Jimin ignored its screams. He reached to take a few of his snacks off of the plate, eating them one by one. After the third cookie, he knew he should have stopped but he couldn’t, they were just too good. After another five minutes, his cookies were gone and they didn’t even make a dent in his stomach. He was still hungry. 

  “Fuck it.” He thought. Sure Namjoon would be upset with him but he’d eventually forgive him and Jimin would find a way to make it up to him somehow. With that thought, he reached  back into the fridge, eating what was left of the food Namjoon had labeled for him. His lunch was gone just as fast as his breakfast, causing his tummy to round out just slightly, but, he wasn’t finished. The dinner Namjoon had set out for him was next and it was absolutely delicious. He always made Jimin’s favorites, all the pork and chicken he could eat. It took him a little longer to finish his dinner as it had the most food out of all of his meals, but once the plate was empty, he pouted again, resting his hands on top of his swollen gut.

  He looks at the clock that hung in the kitchen and it had only been an hour since Namjoon had left..and his stomach was still growling. Peeking back at the fridge, he shrugged and leaned in, continuing to stuff his face with the rest of the food that was stocked in there that Namjoon hadn’t labeled for the massive hybrid. Jimin had it cleaned completely out by lunch time. Leaning back in his creaky chair, he rubbed gently over his gut, panting quietly as he massaged a few burps out of him, making room for more food. He didn’t want to have to get up again, usually he had his Joonie home to bring him food, but today he had to do things on his own for once.

   After a few minutes of massaging his stomach, Jimin forces himself back on his legs, groaning loudly with the effort. He opened the freezer to take out all of the ice cream, waddling to set it all out on the table. That’s when he looked at the cupboards and, to make this the last time he had to get up, went to clear all of the food and snacks from the cupboard, setting them out on the table as well. The hybrid then dragged his chair back over and carefully plopped back down, chair audibly groaning under his weight.

   His ears twiched just slightly at the sound, but he couldn’t be bothered as he was already digging into his ice cream, not eating too fast so he wouldn’t get a brain freeze. As time went on, Jimin’s massive pile of food slowly started to dwindle. Containers and wrappers littered the floor but there was not one speck of food on Jimin or around him. He made sure he got all of that into his mouth. By the time he was finished, he was overly stuffed, skin taut and slightly reddened from the amount of food he ate, just like it always was. Leaning back in his chair once more, he rubbed over his stomach the best he could, massaging more tiny burps out of him. Leaning back was a mistake though as the chair beneath him couldn’t take his weight any longer, the legs snapping and bringing Jimin down with it.

  The impact of him hitting the floor caused his whole body to jiggle and wobble and he made a small pained sound, cheeks flushing red from embarrassment and arousal. He had to find a way to get himself off the floor. He needed more. Him breaking the chair flipped a switch in him that he didn’t even know he had. Reaching up toward the table, Jimin gripped it as hard as he could, rocking himself back and forth to gain momentum to pull his massive ass off of the kitchen floor. It took him a few tries of him falling back onto the ground, but after a few minutes he was finally able to pull himself up into a standing position.

    There was still a cake inside of the fridge that Namjoon had baked last night (assumingly while Jimin was asleep.) Waddling back to the fridge for the last time until Namjoon bought more food, Jimin reached in to grab the cake, turning to look at the other chairs around the dining table. Surely if he sat in them, those would break too and he didn’t want to have to go through hauling himself up again, or worse, losing the cake. Instead an idea popped into his head. Taking the cake to a clean spot in the kitchen, he carefully manuvered it and himself back onto the kitchen floor. Joonie was almost home anyway so he could help him up if he needed after this.

    ------

      Namjoon hurried home as fast as he could. He worried about Jimin, especially if he listened and only ate what he laid out for him that day. He knew he was probably starving and he wanted to be there when he was finally able to pig out, just in case he needed his help. He expected to open the door to him whining and crying about how starving he was. He did not, however, expect his boyfriend to be on his hands and knees, massive tummy squished up against the floor with his face buried in the cake he baked last night. His eyes widened and he moved his briefcase in front of his crotch to hide his oviously growing erection.

    “J-Jimin!? What are you doing!? Why aren’t you eating at the table?”

   At the sound of his boyfriend’s voice, Jimin froze. He slowly lifted his head to look at the taller male, wiping as much cake off his face as he could.

    “I..I tried Joonie. I.. I tried to do what you asked but it was so hard and I got super hungry.. I..I can’t sit in the chairs anymore Joonie. I broke one.”

  Namjoon was so fixated on Jimin when he walked in, he didn’t even notice the chair until now. Looking over at the splintered pieces lying on the floor, looking like a boulder was dropped onto it, Namjoon had to bite back a moan. Fuck. He, Jimin broke a fucking chair.   The hybrid’s voice brought him out of his thoughts though, as Jimin sounded a little teary.

    “A..Are you mad at me?”

   With a quick shake of his head, Namjoon briskly made his way over to his boyfriend, helping him into a sitting position. Jimin had to spread his legs wide to let his stomach rest comfortable between them. Namjoon inhaled slightly, eyeing his stomach before quickly shaking his head and kneeling down, cupping Jimin’s plush face.

    “Honey no, I’m not mad at you. I should have never asked you to hold back on eating when I know how hungry you get. I was just worried you wouldn’t be able to help yourself if I wasn’t home. I.. mm. I have to say I’m turned on though. I never thought you’d break a chair, let alone eat on your hands and knees like this.”

   Jimin flushed at his words, squirming in his spot slightly.

   “W..Well.. when I broke the chair I.. something switched in me and.. and I just needed more? If you like it so much.. do you want to do me a favor?”

   Namjoon nodded, pressing a few soft kisses to Jimin’s messy cheeks.

   “Anything, baby.”

   Jimin smiled shyly, resting his hands over his stomach.

    “Feed me?”

   Namjoon grinned, sliding his hands over Jimin’s before giving his tummy a gently shake.

     “That I can definitely do, Minnie.”

-------------------

Hi this is my frist time actually writing something in a very long while and while I know it’s not the best, it took me awhile to finally finish it. I hope you guys enjoy it and I’ll work on getting my writing to be better the more I practice. 

#chubby jimin #chubby bts #feedee jimin #feeder namjoon #belly kink

[pinkysfaultorbrainsfault]

pinky and the brain - s1e1: das mouse

dejavu! have we been here before?

episode summary: brain concocts a hypnotic pancake recipe in order to hypnotise the surrounding population into being his loyal minions. however, one of the crucial ingredients is the meat of a specific type of crab, which can only be found in the reckage of the titanic.

the rundown:

we open with the mice attempting to blow their cage open.

SENIOR PRODUCER: TOM RUEGGER. sorry about that, y’all, but the opening credits are in the actual show, now, so nothing i can really do about it. at least they seem to have a water bottle in their cage, this time, which is good.

NEVER MIND I GUESS. IT EXPLODED. literally every frame there is a smear frame - again, nothing i can do.

poor mousie go bomp. ):

apparently, the plan was less regarding explosive force, and more to set off a rube goldberg chain of events that completely disobey the laws of physics to end up picking the lock.

PRODUCED BY RUSTY MILLS

it’s hard to convey without animation, but this spoon flies through the air and just straight up lands in the lock. it’s wild.

“ooo!” says pinky, watching this all impossibly unfold. “good one, brain!”

“they’re all good ones, pinky.” we will never be free of brain’s face, it seems.

as the mice wander along, brain tells pinky that tonight’s plan will "recieve the aid of legions of unassuming humans”, because he intends to hypnotise them all with the secretions of!

“what, a frog?”

yes, a frog. apparently the frog sweats out hypnotic fluid. it is Filled With Peptides. (pinky’s response to this is “naaaaaarf”, which is very helpful.) after they collect this fluid, brain just needs to work out how to get thousands of people to ingest it.

“like a giant pancake jambouree?”

“please, pinky, i--”

“yes.”

so pancake jambouree it is. brain cooks pinky an experimental batch before he decides to release them to the masses.

look at brain’s lil dress! and pinky has his tongue stuck out. everyone here is having a good time and it’s very cute. this is exactly what lori alexander wants marriage to be.

pinky does briefly express his concerns that he might, yknow, be hypnotised, but apparently the concoction doesn’t attain Full Potency until he adds the meat of a fancy crab, and these are just test batches so he can work out how to hide the taste of the Frog Juice.

it goes about as well as one would hope.

but never mind, eh? time for crab.

turns out all the crab is stored in the titanic.

still, brain is pretty convinced that they can just.... go down there and get it. look at his lil scheming face. pinky argues during today’s pondering segment that “there’s still a bug stuck in there from last time” (okay?) and brain cuts him off to insist that they GO DOWN TO THE DEPTHS OF THE OCEAN AND RAISE THE HULL OF THAT SORROWFUL SHIP.

he does a gay little point and everything.

so obviously, they have to steal a boat.

brain got one taste of crime from stealing that minivan, and it just never went away.

“behold the alvin, pinky. our ticket to the ocean depths.”

“look, brain! a baby sub on the front!”

“that’s the jason junior, pinky. an additional sub carried by the alvin for remote exploring.”

it’s an additional sub because there’s already one on this mission. (i sweat, watching the fbi draw their guns on me, and insist that i definitely meant submarine. what else could that be, right, guys?)

(the fbi put their guns down.)

anyway the mice steal the boat.

in they go.

the first thing brain does is swap out his hat for one that he brought with him, and demand to be referred to as “captain brain”, so he is definitely someone everyone should take seriously.

he just packed that specifically.

the second thing he does is pull out his big map of the ocean and give pinky a whole bunch of co-ordinates to follow. “bowplans at 2-2-9, on my mark!”

“um, brain?”

well that’s a bastard. brain blames “the sub club”, which i’m sure he knows a lot about BECAUSE HE’S REALLY INTO SUBMARINES, MR PRESIDENT, PLEASE WITHDRAW YOUR MEN

and pinky works out that he can dislodge the wrench-- the submarine clamp??? the county council clamped their submarine for overstaying their welcome in the library submarine park???? - enough for them to make right turns, but not left. inconvenient, but doable.

but before they can set off, brain directs pinky to the radar console.

this apparently stands for Woods Hole Oceanographic Institution, and is their special signal that they would use to trace their submarines for oceanographic purposes. brain requests that pinky randomise the signal so they’re not followed.

a difficult job? sure. good thing pinky is a trained sub operator with a good few years of experience.

.....you can literally see him operating the submarine a few pictures up. stop looking at me like that.

with a few minutes of careful handiwork, pinky successfully scrambles the sub’s internal computation, and leaves it probably a little dazed and confused.

good thing ‘narf’ doesn’t actually mean anything, in this universe, apart from being one of pinky’s verbal tics?

oh dear.

turns out that the CIA have found the submarine, and have realised that it is, for the most part, unidentified, apart from the letters NARF.

“have you ever heard of jack mcguire?”

“captain, north atlantic. cold war nut. he was discharged-- always saying that when the enemy arrived, it would be with some mythical--”

“nuclear attack readiness formation.”

“narf.”

“the old man is concerned.”

“the president?”

“no, just some... random old man.”

so dearest “jonesy” (blonde) is instructed to track down jack mcguire in hopes to get rid of the submarine. because nobody can track down a sub like jack mcguire (hm) and “the boys want that thing terminated.”

“you mean the pentagon?”

“no, my two boys, josh and aaron.”

meanwhile, at the sub club, brain plots their course for the titanic.

see they’re here,

and the titanic is there,

but they can only make right turns, so what should be a two hour journey will take, by brain’s calculation,

“seven months.”

“well. that’s a bit longer, then. isn’t it.”

“are you jack mcguire?”

“who wants to know?”

“the cia. got a job for you. there’s a sub in the water, and they want it terminated.”

“ha.”

“so the boys finally saw it my way, huh?”

“the pentagon?”

“no. josh and aaron.”

“hold onto your newtons, desk jockey. we’re going sub hunting.”

“how long have we been at sea, brain?”

“seventeen minutes.”

it turns out that pinky is so bored that if he doesn’t do something soon, he’ll die. please, brain. this is also me whenever i have to spend more than half an hour in the car.

brain suggests that he tries to improve his pancake recipe, and pinky can try it out for him.

pinky decides that actually, he’s busy, thank you very much.

no dice.

“i’ve got another reading”, says jonesy, in the meantime.

“go.”

“4-6-0-0-5, bearing 2-2-7.”

“they’re running the nautilus.”

“the what?”

“1943. german boat captain heinz grindelwald evaded destruction by running a circular course, based on--”

“a nautilus shell.”

“so we cut them off.”

“whoever these guys are, they’re good. they’re probably plotting a missile trajectory at the oval office as we speak.”

meanwhile, pinky throws up.

“well? any better?”

i hope that answers your question, brain.

“pinky! are you alright?”

cute!

he does drop him immediately after pinky confirms that he is, indeed, still alive, but it was cute while it lasted.

“why don’t you let me try making the pancakes yummy, brain? my mother fed us very well.”

“please, pinky. you’re practically the poster child for cheese whiz.”

“pleaaaaaaaaaase.”

(he gets to make the pancakes.)

because they have bigger problems now, presumably!

that can’t be good.

it wasn’t!

and neither is that. brain laments that “someone is dropping death charges,” while pinky goes and shuts down the engine.

the sub operator saves the day once again.

“THIS IS CAPTAIN JACK MCGUIRE. IDENTIFY YOURSELVES OR BE DESTROYED.”

“this is..... jacques cousteau.”

“really. can you prove that?”

“here, ze ocean is teeming with life. but everywhere, there are signs of man’s encroachment.”

“darn! it is jacques cousteau!”

unfortunately pinky decides now is a good time to chime in with a “haha, nice cousteau, brain” so jack declares that his “little ruse will cost him.”

“i must admit. i admire your skill. perhaps in another time, maybe we could have been friends. we are very much alike, you and i.”

“i doubt that.”

so mcguire fires another charge, and the mice go down. ocean mice! sink.

):

“haha! yeah! we did it!”

“i get no joy from the demise of another man.”

“....usually.”

“HAHA YEAH WE DID IT YES YES YES WE GOTTEM WE GOTTEM WE GOTTEM”

(”take the jason hr on ahead full, mr pinky.”

“aye aye, captain brain.”)

conclusion:

this is a long episode.

still, now that they have a vehicle that steers properly, the boys seem to make it okay.

“we should be approaching the hull of the titanic at any--”

DONK.

“naaaaaaarf.”

“yes, pinky. soon we will have the white crabs of the titanic, and then,”

WE SHALL HAVE THE WORLD

“about that recipe, brain, and, um, getting rid of that bad taste--”

“not now, pinky.”

“but brain?”

“just cut it out.”

“oh! aye aye.”

hm.

so the mice bodge an air pressure mechanism to yeet the titanic to the surface. as you do.

“but brain, the icky stuff--”

“i said cut it out, pinky.”

hmmmm.

the balloon expands, as balloons do, and the titanic wobbles a bit.

RISE, LITTLE ONE, AND BE FREE

neat!

“our journey is almost at at end, my friend! we release the air and propel the ship!”

that’s a very cute happy face!

so brain does exactly that, and the titanic farts itself over to california.

i’m not exaggerating.

perhaps brain feels vaguely at home on the titanic. he has vague memories of being drunk out of his mind, and bathing in a sink. best not to unpack that.

instead, he decides to crash it into acme labs. for the lols.

“yes!”

(:

the pancakes are jamboureeing. it’s very cute.

jonesey and mcguire are here too! “nothing like a pancake jambouree after blowing up a sub, huh.”

they’re dating now, i guess. i mean, i hope they’re dating. they should be.

“as the hypnotic fluid winds itself through the minds of our friends, they shall return, happy and content to have us rule over them.”

“well isn’t that nice,” says pinky, in a very condescending manner. “narf.”

“but tell me, pinky, about your pancake batter. how did you manage to hide the taste of the hypnotic sapo?”

“well, the hypnotic stuff tasted terrible, brain. so like you said. i cut it out.”

bonk.

anyway this one goes to pinky because he is emotionally intelligent enough to A, understand sarcasm, and B, to know and/or remember what the plan was in the first place. perhaps he deliberately threw it out to make sure nobody had to eat bad pancakes? honestly, i don’t blame him. pinky, defender of the earth.

brain: 4 ½ pinky: 6 ½ outside influence: 10

“here’s our course. heading 3-2-9, depth 100 metres, bowplanes at 15 degrees. any questions?”

“um. if you could be any animal, what would it be.”

“oh, i’d have to say a hawk, pinky,”

“so i could soar through the sky,”

“and grab tiny white mice in my claws,”

“and feed them to my young.”

“that’s just... weird, brain.”

#patb #pinky and the brain #no a! tag this time! #but i can put it back if yall want #hehe

[thedegenerateasexual]

horrible stories i have about supernatural porn

this isn’t a blog that i usually post spn content on but my main blog is sfw because i have some minors following it so like  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ anyway these are stories about porn, not porn stories themselves (i do have a link for the last one, but i don’t want to post it in public, because i’m a firm believer of not making fun of fanfic in public). im putting it behind a cut because it’s absolutely gonna ruin your day. if you’re in the polycule you can reblog this bc not everyone has my sideblog but if you’re sitting there going “what’s the polycule” then you can’t

for context, i was on the kmeme for spn in early 2009 before it became nothing but extreme underage and dog porn. i watched it transform into the uh place it is now and eventually bailed. two of the worst spn porn stories i can think of are as follows:

story the first: the spn kmeme had a very strict policy of no kinkshaming. everything is allowed, even underage, bestiality, etc. there was some discourse on the kmeme once about HOW young is too young, exactly? because someone posted a request for filling involving john/sam but sam was, yes, AN INFANT. there was a lot of back and forth about whether or not the person requesting was being a troll and whether or not the people on the request thread were kinkshaming. eventually they ruled in favor of this prompt. it was filled twice.

story the second: i was long gone by the time this posted but it still made waves over to where i was and it’s like, a classic leopards ate my face moment but also it makes me want to die. the kink meme both 1. allows bestiality and 2. has a section for rpf. so obviously the kmeme being what it is there was quite a bit of j*red p*dalecki fucking his dog. i don’t know why. it’s UTTERLY cursed. anyway, the dog died (very sad) and so someone posted a combination prompt of.........rpf/bestiality/NECROPHILIA. they wanted to see the dog being given a, how can we put this, final goodbye. cue more discourse similar to the above. THIS prompt was eventually ruled as a troll prompt and was taken down (but the other one was fine?!?!?!)

stories i have that don’t involve the kink meme: the artist mythagowood. DO NOT GOOGLE “mythagowood supernatural” unless you are prepared to see truly unsettling things. this person photoshops images of the cast engaging in tentacle porn, mpreg, prolapse porn, etc etc. the most famous of all of these is “ass bees” which involves j*red p*dalecki spreading them to his prolapsed asshole covered in, well, yeah, you get the idea. there was a rumor going around that this infamously horrible art is what inspired the “bees?” card in CAH, but no one has ever been able to prove it one way or another

other things: for a christmas event i was participating in, everyone was supposed to prompt 5 things they wanted and then fill at least one prompt someone else left. i thought of four prompts, but blanked on a fifth, and then as a joke i added “draw dean like one of your french girls - wearing this one only this” and posted a picture of the samulet. lo: one of the most famous artists in the fandom actually took me up on it. full frontal. hyperrealistic. it was...incredible. i’ll always be grateful for the hard work she must have put in.

and finally, for a tamer and less cursed example: my favorite dean castiel fic is the one where cas can’t nut until dean says his full name (castiel winchester, obviously). the first time i read this and liveblogged it at @maulthots i laughed so hard i cried. we have spent an inordinate amount of time since committed to the bit:

Sam at the worst possible time: Castiel Winchester Cas: UNNGGHHH

someone: hey whats your full legal name castiel: already crossing his legs

Cas applies for a driver's license and then gets arrested for public indecency

cas goes in to sign the adoption papers for jack and the pen starts shaking in his hand social worker: and the last name? cas: HNNNNNNHGGGH

dean loses cas in a walmart and gets them to make an announcement over the pa and knows which direction to go by following the sound of the nut

cas gets pulled over for speeding and they ask for his license and he has to carefully keep his eyes off of the place where he signed his name cop: castiel winchester huh cas: HHHHHHHRRRG

dean and cas get into a pizza earing contest and cas successfully finishes the last slice. sam stands up and proclaims, "castiel wins--" "HUUOOOGGGGGH"

cas turns on the television ready to enjoy a nice relaxing evening of genre tv oh no. its the vampire diaries OH NO...HIS EYES DRIFT TO THE CORNER C W  “HRRRRRRRKKK”

anyway. it’s a really good fic. i won’t name it in public because it’s rude to make fun of fics in public but absolutely DM me if you want the link. it’ll make you cry i swear

#personal #liz watches spn #i don't know if i have that tag on this blog but in case i wanna be able to find it again later. yk.

[noire-pandora]

Letters

Another prompt from this list. Also on my AO3

Words: 2419

Warnings: none

A few of the letters Inquisitor Elluin Lavellan exchanged with her adoptive mother and her adoptive brother.

Mama,

This is the moment when you can say “I told you so”. I got in trouble. Big trouble. Have you heard about that explosion at the Conclave? Where the Templars and the mages were supposed to make peace? (like that could ever happen). Well, it seems I am the cause of it, or at least that’s what they think.

And no, before you ask me if my magic finally went nuts, it wasn’t my fire magic but a type of magic I never met until now. It got stuck to my left hand, and it’s slowly spreading in my body and only one annoying elf can understand it and keep me alive. He’s getting on my nerves and I wish I could tell him to fuck off but I might die if I do that, so here I am, stuck with an elf I can’t stand. The irony in that, huh? There are other humans here that get on my nerves, but I try to be as respectful as I can. They can kill me so easily. My only salvation is the Mark (that’s how they call it) on my hand.

Besides that, the humans are calling me the “Herald of Andraste” because I physically walked in the Fade and I have been saved by a woman. They believe it was Andraste. And I can’t remember anything. I walked in the Fade, outside a dream and I don’t remember it!! It makes me so furious! I can’t believe my mind betrayed me. It never did that!

Anyway, if you hear the humans talk about a Herald, they are talking about me. No, I don’t like it.

I’ve lost my sketchbook in the Fade. I cried for an entire hour when I realised that.

Are you well? How is everyone doing? How are they baby hallas? Have they started kicking everyone around?

With love,

Elluin.

P.S: I’m in Haven. It’s so cold in here, my bones hurt at night.

---------

Lethallan,

My instincts never failed me. Since the last time we have met, my dreams warned me about your fate every night. A vast shadow looms above you, one shaped in the form of a wolf. My dear child, this is a bad omen. Fen’Harel is testing and tricking you. Please open your eyes for any sign of his presence. The explosion at the Conclave might be his doing.

My dear, since childhood, you had a knack for trouble and your curiosity hurt you many times. I beg of you, do not get distracted. Do not forget our teachings. It worries me you do not understand this magic hurting you. Pay attention to the elf who understands it. He might know more than he shows.

The Herald of Andraste? I do not know if I should cry or laugh at this. They truly have no idea who they are giving this title to. You barely believe in our gods, the gods you were raised with, and they expect you to believe in their human prophet ? The gods have  a peculiar sense of humour. Or the humans are truly disparate.

My daughter, I do not understand what fate you have brought upon yourself, but the appearance of this hole in the sky is worrying. I wish you were not trapped in the middle of it. Stay safe, my sweet child.

I will send you two blankets made with halla’s hair. They should keep you warm at night.

The hallas are growing. They still do not know how to kick, but I imagine they will learn soon.

The soldier you have sent with this letter is becoming nervous to be in the middle of a Dalish Clan and the children are terrifying him with their curiosity. I will stop now before the poor man starts running frightened.

P.S.: This is a prayer I offer to you, child. Keep it in your thoughts every day.

“May the Dread Wolf never catch my scent,

May the Dread Wolf never hear my step,

May the Dread Wolf never feel my breath

May the Dread Wolf never steal my soul.”

----------

Mother,

Thank you for your kind words. But not all that takes place in this harsh world is the fault of the gods. Sometimes, the greed and hate of the mortals are sufficient. And please give that prayer to someone that needs it. I am no one; I am irrelevant. Usually gods like interesting people.

Thank you for the blankets! They smell and feel like home. I can sleep much better like that.

You worry too much. We already have a solution for closing the Breach (that’s how we call the hole in the sky) and in a few months, it will be done. I will come back to you after we close it. This ordeal made me realise how much I miss you. I can’t wait to be scolded by you. It’s going to be even better than your delicious food.

Please say hello to everyone in the clan and tell them I miss them.

All the care and love from your rebellious daughter, Elluin.

------------

Mother,

I guess the words of Haven’s destruction reached you. We survived it. I survived it. Barely. It was terrifying. I got lost and drifted in the snow for three days. I almost died. I don’t remember how I made it to my friends. All I can remember is the cold gnawing at my bones and the trail of blood behind me.

I am sorry it took me so much time to send this letter. I have been busy because now I own a castle! A castle, mother! I never had my room and now I have a castle! We call it Skyhold. It’s a wonderful place, but it needs a lot of repairs and I have to make certain all goes well. Many people joined the Inquisition and I am taking my time to meet every one of them.

Oh, I almost forgot. They made me the Inquisitor. A mage, the head of an organization who formerly hunted down mages. This world is going mad.

Remember that annoying elf I told you about? He saved my life, again. This is the third time he does that, and I don’t know how to thank him anymore. And I’m in love with him. I don’t know what to do with all those new feelings. I shouldn’t fall in love in times of war. But here I am, doing the stuff I am not supposed to do again. I don’t need more complications in my life right now. But my dumb heart races every time I see him because of his kindness and his intelligence. You should see him rant about anything. He will talk and talk and talk for minutes at a time, and I can’t stop listening to him. He’s wonderful.

Please don’t let Alaion about this love part. I will never hear the end of it next time I see him.

I love you, and I wish you were here to give me advice. But the clan needs you more. Please stay safe and don’t let anyone hurt you.

Send all my love to the others too.

Inquisitor Elluin.

---------------

My child,

I wish I could have seen you at Wycome. I understand why you had to remain at Skyhold, but I do miss you. I have told the Commander to send you our thanks with this letter. I do not know what we would have done without his help. He is quite the dashing young man, and he seems to have a deep respect for you.

We are well. A few of us are terrified to be close to humans, but I find this situation a perfect moment to teach the children that humans can be good too. Not only mean and dangerous as those who tried to murder us.

I apologize for the problems we have caused. I should have known people will try to hurt you by getting to us. We will be more careful from now on. After all, my wonderful daughter is the head of an important organisation now. I am proud of you, even if I would have liked to see you in a safer position.

About the previous letter. Alaion read it first. I thought he would die of laughter. He is coming to Skyhold in a few weeks. He wants to write a few words in this letter to you.

El!!!! I can’t believe it. You’re in LOVE! I can’t wait to see his face. I asked the man you sent to help us, and he had no idea you’re in love. But he said his name is Solas. Really, sister? You’re in love with a man who calls himself PRIDE? Actually, that’s not surprising, we’re talking about you. You always had peculiar tastes. I bet he’s a stuck up elf who is so boring, he makes flowers fall asleep. I can’t wait to meet him. He must have something special if he made you fall in love.

We miss you, sister!

--------------

Mother,

Alaion arrived at Skyhold in one piece.You should have seen his face when he saw Skyhold from up close. I thought he swallowed his tongue; he didn’t say anything for a few minutes. I think he might be jealous, but I wish he wasn’t. He’s the leader of his clan, and that’s much better than being here, surrounded by people I can barely understand.

Somehow, I ended up confusing my feelings to the man I love. And, to my surprise, he feels the same. It took me a bit to persuade him, but it seems we are together now. This is going to be interesting. But I am happy, he seems happy, so I guess that’s good.

Alaion was a pain in my butt, always nagging and teasing Solas. And Solas tried to be polite because he knows I care about Alaion a lot. Solas has a sharp tongue and if it wasn’t for me, he would have destroyed Alaion with his wits. But instead, he sighed and gave me a pained look every time my brother opened his mouth.

But I had a wonderful time with my brother. I am glad he likes Skyhold. Having him here gave me the strength to carry on. And he told me he thinks Solas is the best match for me, even if he has a pole stuck deep into his arse. My brother never disappoints, does he?

We are getting close to defeating Corypheus. Just a few more months and I can be done with this mess. I want to come home for a while. Rest a bit. I will invite Solas to join me. He needs to spend a bit of time with a peaceful Dalish clan and learn not everyone is there to get him.

I gave my brother a few packages with food for the Clan. Please give the sweets to the children. I’m sure they are going to love them. I have a present for you. I hope you’ll like it.

I love you, mother.

Elluin Lavellan.

-----------

Elluin,

The knitted scarf is perfect. I can see your knitting skills have improved quite a lot. I am proud of you.

Alaion talked for an entire hour about you, Skyhold, your friends and your lover. He had to stop before losing his voice. He is fascinated by your work and I believe he would have joined you if not his duty to his People. Everyone here is amazed to know you are a great leader. But I am not. Since you were a child, I knew you could move people with your words and actions. This was the reason why I asked you to be the leader of this clan. I truly wish you remained here to lead us, but it seems fate had bigger plans for you. You are the only one who can save the world. And I am proud of you.

You can come back to us at any time. We love you and we miss you. And you can bring your man, too. I am quite curious myself. His mind must be as sharp as a knife if he amazed you with his intelligence.

Fate be in your favour, my child, may the gods offer you their blessings. I will pray for your safety at night.

Mythal enansal.

-----------

Mother,

It’s done. We have won. We defeated the monster. Corypheus is dead. It was a terrible fight; it drained all of us, but we killed him. Finally, after two years of fighting for the safety world, I am done. I am so proud of my friends. They helped me get through it, without them I’d be dead.

I can’t come back just yet. There are a lot of things I need to do. A lot of stuff needs fixing. They still need a leader. Thedas is a mess right now, and it won’t get better if I leave. Now it’s time to help my People. To use my position and power to make things easier for the Elvhen. I helped the mages. Now it’s time for us to grow.

It might take a while until I will be able to do it, but I will. I promise.

I hope you are well. Please tell me if you need anything. I will send my soldiers to help you, no matter what. I love you.

P.S : he left. Without a word. I think I wasn’t good enough. But it is how it is.

------------

My dear,

I knew you would save the world. I am proud of you. You fulfilled your destiny. The world is safe now, and I know you will change and make it a much better place to live in. For everyone.

He left? Your lover? Do you know why? How peculiar. Alaion told me you two looked very in love and he could not keep his eyes off you. Are you sure you are all right? I know you do not like to speak about your feelings, but you said you loved him. I find it impossible to forget your first love that fast. I am here for you, my child. No matter what.

You are not alone in this, Elluin.

----------

Mother,

Forgive me.

Forgive me, mother, you were right.

They are real. The gods, they are real.

And Fen’Harel came. And he stole my heart and my soul.

I don’t know what to do. I am lost. Help me.

#dragon age #elluin lavellan #lavellan #noire writes