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#BUT STILL yea im going to write smth one day that will get everyone to be like wtf mille u good?
majestyjun · 6 months
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very unhinged thoughts abt yandere kai rn—
literally 2 brain cells away from writing unhinged yandere kidnapper kai ok like no one gets it BUT I have such a crazy idea like dark romance and it’s kai so it has to be rlly sweet too but also really crazy like really need him crazy and deranged and insane but really romantic and i !! im going to be in trouble lol
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thedivineflowers · 7 months
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hi!!! Love you works they’re so silly and good😜but sad😔 anyway I hope you’re doing well! I wanted to ask for when the boys (idk how many you’ll take but I think if you need a limited amount go with the first years😭) but yea when the boys say something plain ass bitchy and mean to middleschool!reader, like how were magic-less useless kid (looking at you Ace😡) saying some shit about our family or babying us too much till it become insufferable or smth and then when we get rightfully upset and cry or get upset (leaning on crying for more drama, angst and guilt😘) they realize how bad they fucked up and apologize, I feel like we would be a little stubborn about the apology depended on who it is to😭 but yea my goofy ahh request take your time and you can switch up the characters it’s your writing I don’t care! Love you works<333
YEHAHAHAHAHAH I LOVE THIS IDEA SM AND I LIKE DONT REALLY HAVE A LIMIT UNLESS I COULDNT REALLY THINK OF SOMETHING SO EYEYEYEY
OKAY IMA ETART IM SOMEZCIYED
I ONLY DID THE FIRST YEARS BECAUSE IT WAS GONNA TAKE SOME TIME AND I DIDNT WANT TO KEEP YOU WAITING SO HERE 😆
Ace: he’d always tease you. And during the first few weeks when he was warming up to you he’d diss you by saying that you were nothing without magic. He even referred to you as the useless and magicless kid for some time. Even after months he still referred to you as that and one day you just bursted. “Why can’t you shut up about me being magicless?! I know I’m at a disadvantage but I’m tired of it! The jokes dead now why can’t you get it!? If I could I’d just make a portal by myself to go back to my world so I don’t have to listen to you all damn day but guess what?! Im just some useless and magicless kid!!” You shouted at tears ran down your face. You stormed away and he tried running after you but you quickly maneuvered away from him. Because of his pride he didn’t apologize for days and stayed quiet when around you. One day after he was given a reality check by Deuce he apologized because guilt was really eating away at him. You still avoided him for a bit just to make sure but your friendship came back together.
Deuce: he kinda has a temper (to me he does) and he’ll let it out sometimes making him call you shit like Ace. But because he is trying to be a good student (and a good friend) he’d be very quiet if he’d call you things but you always manage to him whisper it to himself. One day you two were alone in the classroom doing detention because you two got into a fight when a guy mocked you. “Hey, Deuce.” You called him with an empty tone. “Do you really wish that I had magic. That I had someone to look after me so you didn’t have to stick around me all the time?” You asked as you eyes were glued to the table in front of you. Barely managing to answer the first question on your math homework. “I see how you look at me when I mess something up because I lack magic. I just wanna know.” You said as there was a pressure on your throat. Like you wanted to throw up and let out a yell at the same time. His answer only made the pressure worse as your breathing became short. Did he really think that it’d been better if the magic mirror didn’t pick you? That you’d only stay as the schools janitor? You quickly walked out leaving everything behind to go to the teachers bathroom that you had access to. Everyone thought the same thing about you so why were you throwing up in the sink and crying your eyes out? Because you thought of him as different? No. Deuce came to your dorm later that evening with your completed math homework and backpack. He sighed before apologizing about what he said earlier and the things he’s called you. After some talking your friendship was alright but with rockiness
Jack: At first because you were obviously magicless he’d be very overbearing to you when it comes to things like flying your broom three feet off the ground. He’d chastise you when you used simple spells by waking you up the morning and running with him. He’s trying to protect you but it seems that he underestimates what you know you can and can’t do. You’d get frustrated and try to express that you didn’t need to be babied but the words would just stay stuck in your throat because you knew that he was just trying to look after you. “I can do this Jack! You need to stop worrying about me with small things like having the damn ladle stir itself in the pot! I’m not gonna get hurt with it and I know you’re looking after me but you’re making me uneasy like I could die from just touching a book about small spells! You’ve seen me fly a broom around and be perfectly fine in Mr. Crewels class so what is it that makes you think that I need you breathing down my neck all the time?! Is it because I’m magicless and from another world? Is it because I’m still a kid?” You bubbles over and spewed at him one day while you were making yourself dinner. Jack stood there as he awkwardly looked to the side trying to find an excuse. “I-“ “Im not as fragile as you think. If I was I would’ve been dead.” He’d been contemplating how much magic you could handle and he knows you know that he’s watching over you but he doesn’t know that it was getting overwhelming for you. He avoided you for a bit before apologizing and admitting that he had protected you because he feared you were weak because you were still a kid. You nodded in understanding and forgave him.
Epel: he had a small ego boost because he heard that you were magicless and a child who still knew nothing. He’d also heard Vil chatting away about you and saying mean things even when you were around. So he thought that you wouldn’t mind if he did too. You tried getting along with him at one point but he just pushed you away. “Is there something wrong with me that makes you stay away from me? I know that Im nothing like you but I’m trying to make an effort to get along with you!” You cornered him one day in the hall with small tears about to well over. He had almost nothing to say but a small peep “Does me being magicless and from another world disgust you? If it does then just say it already so I can leave you the hell alone and stop wasting my time trying to make an effort!” You demanded “I- no, not at all! I just…” He cleared his throat away of his country accent. “I thought that a kid like you couldn’t go through so many things and not have anything to hold onto yourself, ‘thought it was silly and that everyone and you were bluffin’ so I pushed you away because I thought you were way over yourself before I even got the chance to talk you properly…” he trailed off as you wiped your eyes and looked at him in understanding. Over time you both tried holding conversations to get to know each other and get warmed up so the same mistake doesn’t happen again. (It is hot in my damn room help 😭)
(The ones from diasomnia don’t really know you here)
Sebek 😈: He’d always talk about it was ‘impossible for a child with nothing to their name’ to even do anything in a world where they didn’t belong when he wasn’t stuffing his mouth with praises for Malleus. How ‘Their parents clearly made a mistake in raising them’ because you couldn’t cast a spell in class without needing help or looking at the instructions again. He’d even insult you in front of Malleus when you do someone like walk past their table “That child has no grace when they walk! Even in the presence of my lord himself! Utterly disgusting!” He’d say and the other three wouldn’t really respond because they hardly know you. One day Mr. Crewel had you two paired in a project so you two went to a secluded place to start (I mean he walked away while you followed after him.). “For the hundredth time that species will poison you! Can’t you understand?! Sevens I don’t know how you’re alive when you can’t even memorize stuff like this.” He muttered as he pinched the space between his eyes. You then slammed your fists in the table with tears of Frustration boiling up. “Can’t you understand that I can’t get a grasp of things here?! I’m only (age) and I’m in the (grade) grade! No sebek I cant understand anything because I’m not from here! I’m not supposed to be here making spells or talking to you because I’m supposed to be in a world where I get shut out like you have done to me because of shit like this! I don’t have an identity but only my face as proof of my existence! I don’t care about this project anymore you can blame me all you want I’m leaving.” You concluded before shoving papers in your bag and hastily walking away before he could even speak. After he had complained of what you said to him to Lilia he suggested that he look at it from your view and apologize. So he did. Which earned him nothing more than a smack on the face and a door to his nose. It’s up to you if you forgive him.
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hanakihan · 10 months
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man you have no idea the sheer DESIRE to write something about Titanic esque chulwoo AU
The main drill is that Sungs come from a rather wealthy old noble family (courtesy of Ashborn as their predecessor being royal knight or smth), Jin-Woo is a next heir while Jin-Ah studies to become a doctor (or a nurse depending on timeline it happens im not even completely sure with setting but probably og titanic vibe mixed with Korean Idek wheeze) and parents send them on a cruise ship for vacation (and in hopes jinwoo will meet nice noblewoman or any woman since sungs are pretty chill about bloodline)
Then there’s Jin-Chul who’s a ship engineer/captain in training courtesy of navy captain on pension Gun-Hee. Gun-Hee comes from rather humble background but managed to reach rather prestigious position of first navy and then civil ship captain but now he’s on pension, and this man is an example to Jin-Chul that you can reach your dream despite your upbringing. Jin-Chul himself also comes from rather humble background on verge of poverty but money and fame never fascinated him, but ships and sailing did. When Jin-Chul was assigned on Gun-Hee’s ship as a new engineer, Gun-Hee saw talent in boy and unofficially took him under his wing teaching him to be a captain. Then Gun-Hee left (or honestly more likely was forcefully dismissed) and Jin-Chul got assigned as one of engineers/coal workers on this giant ship, but Gun-Hee still sails under his own name as a trader or smth like that.
Cue sailing day and at evening Jin-Woo excused himself since noble parties bore him to death and anyway, evening is beautiful and sea is calm. Wandering around he stumbles upon Jin-Chul doing small repairs and who nearly hit Jin-Woo in nose with his elbow because he came too close without announcement. Jin-Chul stiffly apologizing because he knows how annoying nobles can be but is surprised when Jin-Woo is the one to apologize for being so careless and invites him for an apology tea or coffee since compared to other choices Jin-Chul seems as a perfect company thanks to his sharp tongue, wits and knowledge.
Some day of cruise pass and they become rather close friends, Jin-Woo visits Jin-Chul in lowest decks which surprises everyone here and they have a rather nice drinking and dancing session, while in turn Jin-Woo helps Jin-Chul to sneak in 1st class deck so they can chat and play chess in peace of room (and so he can introduce Jin-Chul to Jin-Ah). Jin-Woo even tries to gift Jin-Chul his sapphire brooch so he can sell it for nice sum of money and get his own ship or even open his own company or smth, but Jin-Chul politely refuses, satisfied with their friendship.
Cue disaster night. Now think about captain being an incompetent prick (maybe even on levels of Costa Concordia captain damn) and fucking up entire probably miss into sure hit (even if Jin-Chul risked it and asked people to follow his instructions despite it being a big ass discipline insubordination but no one really minded because people saw that captain gives shit orders) but since bridge was still under captains command, instructions contradicted, but it still allowed a graze hit rather than direct one. So yea this gets worse, Jin-Chul was in section that suffered from impact and got tore, barely got out of here along with most of his men. Seeing how fast water fills decks he tells people to go higher and himself runs to find Sungs or other people he knows. Apparently he finds panicking Jin-Ah and through dangers of ice cold water and falling construction manages to cross paths with Jin-Woo until they got separated again. They manage to get out of sinking shell that nearly becomes their coffin (because he promised Jin-Woo to take care of and save Jin-Ah no matter what goddamnit), Jin-Chul manages to place Jin-Ah on some drifting wood before starting to sink because of cold water.
Now, I’m a sucker for happy endings despite shit looking really bad, so let’s say Jin-Woo with others on safe boat manages to find shell shocked Jin-Ah wrapped in Jin-Chul’s coat, pointing at water and trying to say something with her teeth chattering and managing to say that he’s drowning, Jin-Woo saying ‘not on my fucking watch’ and jumps after, managing to grab him and drag on surface, man is absolutely freezing with lips blue and not really conscious but still weakly breathing.
ANYWAY they safely get back on shore, they all get medical treatment, Jin-Chul earns himself pneumonia (well fuck his sailing dreams ig), Sungs’ gratitude for saving their children and a fucking trial because captain blamed entire catastrophe on lower deck crew defying his orders and following engineer’s ones and that’s a big ass crime in navy. Things ain’t looking good because they want to prosecute him in shortest time to give people answers who’s the guilty one, Jin-Woo is really ready to throw hands with people, Jin-Chul’s patient explanations through coughs ain’t helping because no one can confirm accuracy of his words and that’s when Gun-Hee himself enters court saying smth like ‘maybe you should interrogate deck staff too to hear what commands captain was giving’ and then our sir proceeds to destroy this captain‘s whole career. Jin-Chul is cleaned of accusations and becomes a sort of a good example semi-legend, but thanks to extreme colds diving he now can’t sail on long distances but fear not Gun-Hee invites him to work for him since Jin-Chul is out of commission and Jin-Woo once again gifts Jin-Chul a sapphire brooch but this time asking if Jin-Chul will share future with him. Jin-Chul honestly having ??? reaction while Jin-Woo with the most deadpan face asks ‘You seriously think I’ll dive into cold waters of ocean at night to drag you on surface and then using my body warmth to keep you alive if i didn’t cared about you???’
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zhuhongs · 3 years
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Upon rereading tgcf, one of the biggest complaints I have is how lackluster all the extra chapters were. literally none of them were good and all contained rlly gross and harmful sentiments (like the amnesia one which.. yea.. or all the things implying xl should get pregnant for hc thus equating gay relationships with hetero ones and playing into the wife thing and just GOD I HATE MXTX) 
There were a lot of little plot points i wish that had been further elaborated on more in the extras as opposed to hualian being ... like that. I had enough. Like mdzs had actaully good extras (minus the incense burners) that were nice side stories that elaborated more on the characters. Like the hook one with the juniors was so cute and i loved seeing them grow more. Or the lotus pod extras omg.. im such a lotus pod extra stan. those were so cute and gave us a lot of good insight into just how lovestruck lwj was during the times when he didn’t see wwx. mxtx should've stuck to those sorta extras in tgcf but NOOO. SO I have a list of so many other more interesting things those chapters couldve been spent on like:
A resolution on He Xuan’s revenge and his character arc. Bc its implied He Xuan is still hanging out and watching over sqx and that taking revenge didn’t fully satisfy him bc ok.. yea shi wudu is dead but he xuans family will never come back. Now what does he have to live for?? i wish we couldve seen a look into his life during the entire ordeal. like a chapter from his perspective while he was posing as Ming Yi  and maybe a look at a conversation btw he xuan and the real ming yi or a chapter after SQX was banished to see what he’s doing now. Also what did he xuan owe hua cheng money for anyways?? Like ik not every little thing has to be explained but I Want to Know. PLEASE more goth boyfriend content now I just wanna see him :,((
a better resolution of yin yu and quan yizhens storyline. im still mad abt how that plot point was split btw books 3 and 5  when it was rlly out of place and  there were other more pressing plot matters and it just rlly deserved more time. Also i thought yin yu died!?!?!? but apparently one of the extras says he’s alive and man... i;m not reading any more of the extras to see that, give me a full yin yu and quan yizhen chapter.. fuck.
a day in the life of the guoshi fangxin or general hua PLEASE especially like one where hua cheng was SO CLOSE to meeting xie lian but had no clue that xie lian was there at the time but the two did smth that inadvertantly helped the other and they still were connected even though they hadnt met omg pls that’d be so nice. like imagine Hua cheng catching a glimpse of the guoshi in public in yong’an while he’s trying to follow some lead that points to xie lian or maybe following a lead to capture qi rong bc he said he knew qi rong was a part of the yong’an stuff and originally thought the guoshi was one of qi rongs pawns. like can you IMAGINE him getting so close. but at the last second he did smth small that impacted xie lian. like they bumped into eachother on the street or smth. god i’d go crazy
OR vice versa.. like a day in the life of the young ghost king hua cheng. Like again, one of my biggest issues was that hua cheng just knew everything and its never really explained how he got all of that info. like yes he’s been alive very long and has eyes and ppl working for him everywhere but like... how did he build that network?? I’d love to see a chapter of young ghost king hua cheng travelling around trying to learn as much as he can abt the world and how it can help bring him to xie lian. and the two maybe are in the same kingdom for a bit and they don’t meet exactly but hua cheng stops some fight or something and helps xie lian indirectly or maybe xie lian is performing on the street in some costume and hua cheng doesn’t recognize him and smiles and gives him a coin or smth. idk i’m just dying for any sorta extra chapter or fic like that. i’m honestly so tempted to write my own but i cant write
also!! we’ve seen how xie lian picks up people down on their luck near him and show them kindness (like banyue, lang ying, xiao ying, he tried to with san lang but we know how that ended lmao) so i’d love to see another little vignette of him doing that on his travels and how every person he meets teaches him smth about life and being a good person and idk, i just think it’d be rlly sweet. i love this facet of his character and feel like we didn’t see enough of it towards the end.
ALSO hua cheng only seems to respect one heavenly official besides xie lian and thats yushi huang.. i assume thats mostly bc she was the only one to help xie lian and let him use the rain master hat to bring water to yong’an. I was thinking maybe when he was a new supreme he had run into trouble and maybe was picked up by the rain master and helped him heal and in return he promised to help protect her village from harm in the future. Like i know a heavenly official wouldn’t cooperate with a ghost like that but yushi huang is different and doesn’t really care about the heavens so i think she would protect him if he could do something to benefit her village. ik this is kinda far fetched but when he first became a supreme I’m sure a bunch of ppl probably tried to mess with him and didn’t rlly believe him to be undefeatable bc he hadn’t proved himself yet also i doubt all his power came overnight. he had to learn how to use it once he escaped the kiln. and some group probably thought they could weaken him somehow. I’m thinking maybe a rlly well formed group of ghosts actually caught him off guard once and he had to retreat and was picked up by the rain master and stayed with her and learned from her a bit. i think it’d be a cool concept also i just rlly want more yushi huang content and i’m on their friendship agenda bc he rlly did seem to actually respect her when she first appeared and i think it’d be cool if the two had some history together.
Also idrc if this was addressed I couldve missed it But!! Did xie lian ever tell Hua cheng that the reason he got the curse shackles and was banished again in the first place wasnt bc jun wu wanted to punish him, but because he requested it. And specifically requested it bc he felt guilty abt letting wu ming take the human face disease and disperse for his sake. So he took the shackles and descended to atone for that?? Bc I dont recall hua cheng learning that bc his soul was already dispersed at that point so it didnt follow him and xie lian didnt say anything so uhhh... someone should tell hua cheng that. Like I dont think xie lian rlly said how much hua cheng meant to him and didnt show him he was loved in grand ways. Like xie lian did always care for bc in other ways but I think if hua cheng learned abt this on screen it wouldve been such a great moment and I'm rlly surprised mxtx didnt address this iirc!?!? Like imagine jun wu telling Hua cheng this in the kiln bc xie lian wouldnt say it himself. Imagine how cool that would be.
Also a small thing adding into the whole young ghost king Hua cheng stuff. Its implied and p much stated that hua cheng isnt his real name. That he likely doesnt have a real name bc his parents died? (It's not clear. I'm still mad at mxtx for not making his childhood clearer). So I'd like to see when and why hua cheng chose that name for himself. The new tgcf ending song kinda hints at its meaning with the lyrics "for you I'd fill a city of flowers" as xie lian is the flower wielding martial god so it's probably inspired by that. Also xie lian saved hua cheng from leaping off the city walls but I'd love to hear him say it bc the implication of his name didnt dawn on me for quite a bit and I dont know if everyone made the connection. Again I sure as hell didnt. So itd be cool to see a chapter that takes place in his past after just ascending as a supreme
Overall I rlly think tgcf had a lot more potential to be even better and a lot of that comes down to fleshing out the side characters and letting hualian have more of a storyline independent of one another. like i know the appeal and message of tgcf is that through love, people can overcome anything, but fuck man. i just wanna see what these two (mostly hua cheng) where like in the absence of each others presence. Part of what I really liked abt mdzs is that we got to see that longing develop btw wangxian when the two weren’t together and how they thought about each other and did things in thei others spirit bc they knew the other wouldve done the same thing. but whatever, mxtx was too consumed by her own unhealthy idea of what devotion and true love looks like but still. i rlly think the extras couldve helped the story be better rather than be fujoshi fuel that i try to bleach from my mind -_-
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okay im going to be real vage rn (for the second time because tumblr fucked up)
i get major anxiety form certain things i see on social media or when i think about it.
ik certain things cant happen in (my) life and i want and can accept that but my brain still goes back to painful thoughts which make me feel miserable and anxious again. idk how the properly say it, it just hurts me in general.
i also know that taking a social media break could help, but there is also a part of me that gets anxiety because im not active. im already less active, but i will not go on a full sm break because i have no life (most of the times im looking at memes and stuff and im too tired or drained to do smth else). however im not going to be very interactive. i want to but it takes energy to do so and sometimes i dont even have enough energy to be alive or do other things. ik this sounds like im down bad, but trust me i aint, sometimes its just one (or many) of 'those' days yk. i am trying though because i want and need to be more social, if i dont im going to feel more down
well now that im writing this, ill say this too:
this additionally applies to fics too. to everyone who tags me in their stuff (tagging some of those blogs @soft-haz @uglypastels @fanficparker @starlight-loki @in-a-lot-of-fandoms-tbh @its-a-leap-of-faith-kid) thank you for tagging me in your works, i really appreciate it. idk when ill read it (or interact) but i will eventually. ill also try to comment and all. still, i takes me a lot of energy. so i wont interact soon after you post it (unfortunately). i apologise though for not admiring your works like i used to do so.
i know (lol i say this a lot) that my blog is not popular and very known, but i still want this to be clear. maybe this is just for me because yea getting thoughts about whats really going on out of your head if too damn difficult and randomly happens
okay wow that was a lot and i hope that i wrote everything that i wanted to say probably not lol idk why i wanted to say this now and actually post it, anyway this has been on my mind lately
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sincerelydavina · 3 years
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I saw DAVINA SHAUGHNESSY at a coffee shop in QUEENS today. I forgot how much SHE looks like HUNTER SCHAFER. She is a TWENTY ONE year old FREELANCE ARTIST & STUDENT who’s been in NYC for TWO YEARS now. Every time we run into each other, they are always ROMANTIC & PHILOSOPHICAL but I’ve heard people say they can also be MALLEABLE & NAIVE. SUMMER HEAT BY HAYDEN JONES reminds me of them every time it comes on the radio. — [g, she / her, 24, aest]
laughs eternally until a steel beam falls on top of me and i d*e . sorry i guess im just in a silly goofy mood
its me again. u already know what it is .
more importantly, let me introduce u to kwangel davina shaughnessy !
inspiration : jules vaughan ( euphoria ) , sutton brady ( the bold type ) , cher horowitz ( clueless ) , elle woods ( legally blonde ) , 
fashion design major and a fashion designer and artist in general !
always covered in paints or oils or crayons / marker
always dressed 10000/10 great ( and willing to take wild fashion choices like dying her hair bc she feels like it . colouring her lashes . wearing smth outrageous n bold etc )
will sketch anyone , anytime . everytime . she loves sketching people in varying places and positions 
sees Art in everything . a bird shitting ? that’s art baby !
Literal Ray of Sunshine
so easy to get along with, trust me
she will be anyone and everyone’s best friend
friendly, non-judgemental, fun. what more could u want? davina is the whole package ok, I love her.
will do your makeup and be ur therapist as she does it.  a lot of ‘mhmm’ and ‘you don’t say’ and ‘GASP. HE DID WHAT???’.
deeply philosophical . every convo with davina is that convo at 3am , wondering the streets , spilling your guts to each other 
 will try anything once. literally. is the friend u go to who will almost always say ‘yes!’ or ‘hell yea !’ 
definitely Soft, but also .. not gullible or naive or anything. like sure, she knows she’s nice and trusting, but u can’t just treat her like shit, bc she has her Own Back and Loves Herself greatly 
you know those people that peel clementines and fruit and always offer u some silently ? thats davina . she loves people . 
she’s a touchy person , too . if she has a friend near her , she’ll always be stroking their hair or patting their back . she is such a LOVER 
bisexual as heck  .
trans , and has known she’s been trans since basically when she started high school . she worked hard to slowly transition and introduce herself as davina . she still works every day to be herself and be 1000% unapologetically so that person .
definitely is shy  / nervous upon first meeting people but masks it by being outgoing . she is good at hiding certain parts of herself when she needs to .
will fall in love 1000000 times a day , but honestly she just loves everything all the time . she sees romance in everything . unlike jonah who just LIKES the world , davina LOVES the world . she is an artist in that everything can and will be her muse 
matches ur energy pretty much all of the time and id like to think she’s generally quite likeable and easy to get along with bc she can read ppl well 
can sometimes give too much of herself to others and forget to take care of herself and put herself first , too . if she loves u / is ur friend . . man , she’ll fight TOOTH AND NAIL for u and ur happiness
pls plot with her
pls write with her
she’s cute i promise
love u
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jimimn · 3 years
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HI ITS ME WHO'S NOT OVER JJK BLONDE SELFIE AND WILL NEVER BE -💫
HELLLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO <33333333
HONESTLY ITS THE WAY YOH SAY SUCH NICE THINGS AND I DISAPPEAR FOR DAYS ON END BECAUSE INCONSISTENCY BLEEDS INTO EVERY CORNER OF MY LIFE FNEKALKD BUT I'M GETTING DONE WITH MY FIRST LEG OF EXAMS ON MONDAY SO YAY TO THAT!! OKAY I THINK WE'LL MOVE SLOWLY WITH BABY STEPS JUNGKOOK DROPPED SOME SELCAS JIMIN DROPPED SOME SELCAS IN THE WORDS OF THE LEGENDARY JEON JUNGKOOK ALL WE NEED NOW IS "together..BAM!" (THAT'S LITERALLY ONE OF MY FAVORITE MOMENTS EVER THE WAY HE SAYS IT 🤧)
YES IN THIS HOUSE WE SCREAM OVER JIMIN'S DISRESPECT HE IS THE PARAGON OF A MULTI-FACETED MAN THAT HAS US WRAPPED AROUND HIS FINGER. THE AUDACITY 😤
CHANEL X JIMIN LETS MAKE IT HAPPEN AND OMG THAT SELFIE THAT DROPPED?? SIR???? WHAT THE ACTUAL HELL?? I MEAN YES BH SAID LET'S DROP SELFIES IN BULK BUT THAT ONE PICTURE OF HIM IN BLACK(GREY? I DONT KNOW FHSKKAJF) WITH THE SHIRTS UNBUTTONED!!! THEM COLLARBONES ARE FREE AND THEY'RE THRIVING IN THE OPEN IN THAT ONE. ALSO HIS LIPS ARE SO PRETTY. OH GOD LITERALLY HE HAS THAT COCKY SMIRK ON HIS FACE WHEN HE KNOWS HE DOES HOT BOY SHIT LIKE SHUT UP OK YOU CANT DO THAT JAIL FOR U NDNSLSKAJJW
SUCH A FUCKING TEASE THATS RIGHT!! EVEN STRAIGHT MEN?? BRO LIKE HOW DO YOU HAVE ALL GENDERS JUST TRIPPING OVER THEMSELVES FOR YOU IT'S INSANE AND OMG MISS SHIVI HAVE YOU SEEN THAT ONE CLIP IN WHICH JIMIN HOLDS HIS GAZE WITH THESE MEN WHO LOOK AT HIM (i think it was bon voyage?) and when they cross each other he JUST SMIRKS AND RUNS HIS HAND THROUGH HIS HAIR LIKE YEAH OK ALEXA PLAY I'M SEXY AND I KNOW IT. AND YES I'LL LISTEN TO EVERYTHING YOU HAVE TO SAY ANYTIME 💗💗
12PM KST IS THE HOLY HOUR I TELL YOU ALTHOUGH I REMEMBER WAITING THE NIGHT BEFORE BE CAME OUT WAITING FOR SOMETHING TO COME AND BH WAS JUST LIKE "yea...no" OMG THAT'S AWESOME YOUR COUSIN'S VISITING YOU
HHFJDOSO YEAH IT'S BEEN A WHILE SINCE THEY DID THE JUMP ALTHOUGHHHH I'M POSITIVE THEY'LL DO SMTH COOL LIKE THAT IN THEIR CONCERTS BECAUSE THEIR PERFORMANCE QUALITY IS JUST.. THROUGH THE ROOF IT'S CRAZY!! WHEN THE PERFORM WINGS?? LIKE HOLY SHIT NO CHOREO NO POSITIONS JUST BTS RUNNING AROUND THE STAGE MAKING THE CROWD GO FERAL I LOVE EVERY WINGS PERFORMANCE SO MUCH MY SEROTONIN LEVELS ARE ALWAYS AT A HIGH THEN. OOHH MY GODDD BS&T IS REALLY THAT BITCH!!!! WHO'S DOING IT LIKE HER TODAY NO ONE IS EXACTLY. AND NOOOO I TOTALLY GET IT WE THINK ON THE SAME WAVELENGTH THAT ACCIDENT HAS THE SAME EFFECT ON ME. IF ONLY YOU'D TOLD ME THEN IN 2016 THAT THAT ACCIDENT WAS THE START OF SO MANY I'D BE PREPARED FOR EVERYTHING THAT FOLLOWED (see: him basically stripping himself that one serendipity performance. holy shit.)
FOR REAL THO CHRISTMAS LOVE DROPPED OUT OF NOWHERE AND DO YOU REMEMBER JIMIN SAYINF uUH iM nOt wORkInG oN a SoLo SoNg aT ThE mOmEnT heHe LIKE ALL MEN DO IS LIE OK AT THIS POINT. BYE. YES TAEHYUNG DID WARN US BUT ARMYS (LIKE MYSELF) PUT THEIR CLOWN WIGS ON AND THOUGHT IT WAS KTH1 LMAO. OMG I HOPE YOU DON'T SLEEP THROUGH ANY OF THEIR UPCOMING SONG RELEASES BUT I'M SURE IT'S THE BEST FEELING TO WAKE UP TO CHECK YOUR NOTIFS AND SEE "Big Hit Labels" BECAUSE THAT'S HOW YOU KNOW IT'S GOING TO BE FIREEE. DUDE SERIOUSLY I NEED JIMIN TO GO LIVE AGAIN (although we've been well fed by namjoon for now🤧😌💗) LIKE THAT ONE YT LIVE WHERE HE SAID "O...M...G" SHUT UP STOP BEING SO CUTE I'M DHJSWLIFJWKALS
LMAO OKAY YEAH THAT'S VALID YOUR BLOG THEME IS BASICALLY ✨jimin✨ AND I LOVE THAT IT REALLY GRAVITATED ME AND YOUR URL OH MY GODDDDDDDDDDD YOUR BRAINNN 💆‍♀️💆‍♀️💆‍♀️💆‍♀️💆‍♀️
YES YES YES JIMIN IS SO PERFECT AND THE SOCK DOODLESSS 😭😭😭 oooo so when did you get into giffing? how did you start? BROOOOO YOUR URL'S ORIGIN STORY. I LOVE IT WOW YES IT'S DEFINITELY GOT THE REQUIRED ✨pazzaz✨
NOOO OMG THIS URL IS YOUR BRAND LIKE YOU'RE A LEGEND ON ARMYBLR I LOVE IT SO MUCH. BUT STILL!! IT'S YOUR CHOICE AT THE END 💖
OMG QUARANTINE DID IT'S ONE GOOD JOB AND GOT YOU INTO BANGTAN YAY. OMG YOU AND MISS LIFEGOESMON ARE FRIENDSS??? LEGENDS INTERACTING THIS IS SO COOL. LMAO THE PARADIGM SHIFT YOU MUST'VE FELT FROM LISTENING TO STAY GOLD (WHICH BTW THE MV...THE LITERAL CUTEST OH GOD THE LITTLE DOG AND JIMIN'S LITTLE SMILES DHSJAOWO) TO THEN GOING TO BST IN WHICH JIMIN IS BASICALLY STRIPPING AND JUNGKOOK IS UPSIDE DOWN LMAOOO. YES BS&T HAS EVERYONE HOOKED THE POWERRRR. YOU FALLING DOWN THE RABBIT HOLE WITH YOUR FRIEND'S ASSISTANCE OH GOD THIS IS SO CUTE 💓 EVERYTHING ABOUT THEM 🥺🥺🥺
AAAAH OKAY MY STORY ISN'T AS INTERESTING AS YOURS IS BUT IN 2016 BASICALLY ALL I KNEW OF KPOP WAS GANGNAM STYLE AND WASNT WILLING TO CUANGE THAT PERCEPTION (FOOL BEHAVIOUR I TELL YOU) AND WAS TOO BUSY OBSESSING OVER ONE DIRECTION'S REUNION AND SO ONE NIGHT (THE NIGHT BEFORE JIMIN'S BIRTHDAY 🤧🤧) I JUST STUMBLED UPON THEIR BS&T TEARS MV AND I HEARD IT AND I WAS LIKE OMG!! THIS IS THAT SUPER ADDICTIVE SONG THAT I'D HEARD SOMEWHERE AND IT JUST SPIRALLED FROM THERE I REMEMBER SEEING JIMIN AND BEING LIKE 👀👀👀👀 WHO IS HE I LIKE HIM AND JUST HIS AURA DREW ME IN SOOO MUCH AND WHEN I WAS GETTING INTO THEM I REMEMBER WRITING THEIR NAMES IN MY NOTES TO SEE IF I COULD REMEMBER 🤧 AND I STILL HAVE THAT NOTE FROM 4+ YEARS AGO 💓 AND YEAH BASICALLY SEEING THEM DO ALL THE MUSIC SHOWS AND STUFF AT THE TIME WAS SO COOOL AND MIND YOU BH DIDN'T HAVE SUBS FOR BANGTAN BOMBS THEN SO WENT ON THESE SKETCHY DAILYMOTION TYPE SITES LOOKING FOR ALL THE CONTENT I COULD CHURN OUT LMAO
AND YES!! COURTESY OF YOU I DID WATCH SOME RUN EPS!! I WATCHED THEIR CANADA ONES SPEAKING OF WHICH I LOOOVE THAT PART WHERE THEY'RE DOING THAT SONG GUESSING THING IN THE MORNING AND JIMIN SAYS "are you cold?" 🥺🥺 TO TAE AND HUGS HIM URRHRHEHSJSJSH AND I ALSO SAW THE ONES WITH THE PUPPIES GODDDDD I LOVE THE PUPPIES ONE SO MUCH LITERALLY JUNGKOOK AND HIS DOG (MIRI?) OH MY GOD THAT LIL FLUFFER AND ADAM IS MY ICON WITH HOW HE JUST DID HIS OWN THING LMAO.
BUT ANYWAY!! DO YOU HAVE A FAVE ERA?? LIKE DO YOU EVER LOOK AT THEM AND GO "Damn I wish I was a fan then" BECAUSE HONESTLY I WISH I HAD STANNED THEM IN THEIR DOPE ERA BUT I DON'T THINK I WOULD HAVE SURVIVED JIMIN THEN DHKSOWID-💫
FOR THE UMPTEENTH TIME!!!!!!! ITS OKAY!!!!!!!! I TOTALLY TOTALLY UNDERSTAND!!!!! AND YAYYYYY CONGRATS I HOPE THE FIRST LEG OF EXAMS WENT WELL <333333 AND OH MY GOD you’re gonna make me cry with the together baam goddddddd same one of my fave moments and jimin’s giggles after that 😭😭😭😭 my babies <3 :((((
that..... black suit selca....... that opened button...... like open one more dear sir who’s stopping you... just do it <33333 YEAH he totally needs to shut up with his i know im hot side it just kills me every single time 😭😭😭😭😭
LISTEN THAT BV3 MOMENT  S H O O K  ME OKAY????? THOSE GUYS LOOKED AT HIM AND HE WAS SO FUCKING SMUG ABOUT IT (AND HE SHOULD BE) AND THE WAY HE LICKED HIS LIPS AND RAN HIS HANDS THROUGH HIS HAIR????? LIKE HE KNOWS HE HAS EVERY SINGLE PERSON; NO MATTER WHAT GENDER; WRAPPED AROUND HIS LIL PINKY LIKE THAT???????
OH MY GOD ME TOO I LOVEEEEEEEEEEE THE WINGS STAGE AND WATCHING THEM HAVE SO MUCH FUN IS JUST SO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND I ALSO ABSOLUTELY LOVVVEEE THEIR ENERGY DURING THE SY TOUR MEDLEY WITH IDOL AND BAEPSAE AND FIRE AND DOPE ZSXDFGFCHGVJBHJN THEY JUST LOSE THEMSELVES IN THE CROWD AND THE MUSIC AND ITS JUST SO FUCKING SURREAL TO WATCH HOW MUCH THEY ENJOY DOING WHAT THEY DO!!!!! kinda makes me want to find that happiness and passion in whatever i do in my professional life <3 and LISTEN jimin said the break the soul commentary THAT HE COULD DO SERENDIPITY SHIRTLESS TOO. THE AUDACITY. HE SAID THAT WITH HIS WHOLE CHEST. 
YOU KNWO WHAT I THINK JIMIN WON’T GIVE US A HINT BEFORE DROPPING PJM1. HE’LL JUST DROP IT ONE FINE DAY OUT OF NOWHERE LIKE HE DROPPED PROMISE AND CHRISTMAS LOVE (i wasn’t here when he dropped promise but i read that on twitter sdfghjkl) AND NO PLS NO I DO N O T WANT TO SLEEP THROUGH JJK1 OR KTH1 OR PJM1 OR KSJ1 OR NAMGI MIXTAPE 3 OR HOBI MIXTAPE 2 OR ANYTHING BASICALLY YOU GET IT i had slept through dynamite cb because i had NO CLUE that they were gonna drop it at 1pm kst rather than 12 am kst. i was under the impression that since they dropped all the teaser pictures and the teaser itself as 12 am kst, the mv will drop at 12 am kst too. and I woke up like two hours after the mv dropped (which was almost noon my time) and i felt like A FUCKING FOOL AND I JUST 😭😭😭😭 NEVER WANT TO FEEL LIKE THAT EVER AGAIN 😭😭😭 
AND YES BABIE NEEDS TO COME LIVE SOON PLS I MISS HIM SO FUCKING MUCH :((((( AND HIS O...M.....G HAD MADE ME FUCKING SOBBBBBBBBBBB his yt live god he looked sooooooo fluffy with his hair and his tiny hands and his puppy eyes and soft voice im just so 😭😭😭😭😭😭
NO NONNONONONO PLEASE IM NO LEGEND DON’T SAY THAT IM EMBARRASSED im just a normal fangirl who makes okayish gifs 😭😭 and ok yes so i started giffing LONNNGGGGGG time back on a different public fan forum from my country but i never knew the right process and stuff so obviously the gifs were shitty lmao BUT ANYWAY i got into gifmaking PROPERLY this in july last year and obviously struggled a lot in the beginning because i didn’t know shit about colouring and stuff lmao but i kept practicing and even though im not perfect rn i do think that i got better. i love giffing tho. its such a nice creative outlet and whenever i gif the boys it brings me so much happiness :( <33
AND YES ASDFGHJKL ME AND HER ARE FRIENDS SINCE A VERY LONG TIME SDFGHJK LIKE LONG BEFORE BOTH OF US GOT INTO BTS SDFGHJ and ah yes the whiplash lmaooooooo and you’re right god the stay gold mv is SO FUCKING PRETTY THE COLOURS IN THAT ENTIRE MV HELLLOOOOOOOOOOOOOO AND JIMIN AND TAE AND JOON WITH THE DOGGO JUST EVERYTHING SDFGHJK <3333333 AND BS&T DUDE I GIFFED THE MV YESTERDAY AND IM 💀💀💀💀💀 (like i just giffed jimin from the mv but i did watch the whole thing 5647589 times <333333) AND GUESS WHAT!!!!!! I WAS A LILLY SINGH FAN (IDK IF YOU KNOW HER SHE’S A YOUTUBER) BACK IN 2016 AND PEOPLE BACK THEN HAD REQUESTED HER TO REACT TO BS&T MV AND I HAD WATCHED HER REACTION VIDEO AND (although it didn’t stick with me back then because i was a fucking fool) I DID SOMEHOW REMEMBERED THE JIN AND STATUE KISSING MOMENT AND WHEN IN 2020 I SAW THE MV AND SAW THE KISSING MOMENT MY BRAIN JUST!!!!!!!!!!! I WAS LIKE HOLY SHIT I HAVE SEEN THIS BEFORE SOMEWHERE AND THEN I REMEMBERED I HAD SEEN THIS IN THE REACTION VIDEO LMAOOOOO i wish i hadn’t been a fool and gotten into them back then :((((
AH NO OMG YOUR STORY IS SOOOOOOO CUTEEEEEEEEEE ATLEAST YOU WEREN’T A FOOL LIKE ME TO NOT GET ATTRACTED TO BS&T THE FIRST TIME OF SEEING IT!!!! I WANNA HIT MY 2016 SELF LIKE DAMN YOU YOU FOOLISH ASSHOLE AND yes omg how did y’all do the subs thing damnnnnn i can’t imagine
AND YES THE CANADA RUN EPIS ARE LOOOVVVEEEE and that vmin moment plsssssss i cry everytime 😭😭😭😭😭 it is just so soft and innocent and tae’s little smile after jimin just turns around and hugs him 😔😔😔😔 i love soulmates 😔😔😔😔 AND MIRI YES OMG EVERYONE WAS SO IMPRESSED BY THE LITTLE CUTIE AND THE WAY JUNGKOOK JUST KEPT ADORING HER THROUGHOUT MADE ME SO SO SOFTTTT and bro adam is me. i am like that. lazy and un-motivated AF. although if i were a dog and jin were to be my owner i would listen to him so well and jump on him every chance i’d get 😌😌😌
GOD YES RED HAIR DOPE ERA JIMIN 💀 BABIE BUT MAKE IT SEXY 🥵🥵 AND OMG YESDGFHG MY FAVE ERA IS HYYH. ORANGE HAIRED JIMIN. PLS. HE’S EVERYTHING. I WISH I HAD GOTTEN INTO THEM DURING THAT. LIKE THAT ERA IS ..... SOMEHOW SO FUCKING WILD AND STILL SO ASSURING AND CALMING ????? KEEPS ME ROOTED LIKE IDK HOW TO EXPLAIN DFGHJKL AND WINGS TOO DAMN I WISH I WAS HERE TO LIVE ALL THOSE AMAZING ERAS. but even though i wish i had gotten into them earlier... i think i found them when i needed them the most. I was going through a very difficult time last year and they somehow they made me feel so fucking safe and at home that the connection was instant. honestly i’ve never stanned or felt a connection with any celebrity as strong as the one i feel with bangtan. its like... they don’t know i exist but they still know EXACTLY what im feeling and what to say or do at that time to make me feel comforted. Its weird god but its true :((( SORRY I GOT EMO I JUST LOVE THEM A LOT SDFGHJKL
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piplupod · 4 years
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"i have adhd and forget whats in my fridge"
DOES THIS SOUND LIKE YOU? even if u don't have adhd and just forget abt what you have in ur fridge, this guide might help you!!!
(sorry for the low quality pics, i was lazy)
first! find a whiteboard! i was using this one for outlining a novel but im done w it now!
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clean that sucker off! now find some whiteboard/dry erase markers!
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excellent! you've got what u need now!
NOW. u know t-charts? the kind that teachers love to make u draw and everyone would freak out bc they didnt have a ruler and it wouldn't be perfectly straight? yea we're gonna draw one of those on our whiteboards!
mark one side as "Fridge" and the other with "Freezer" (assuming you have a freezer!)
and then over towards the center line on the right, write down "Expiry Date" or something along those lines
(i wrote ExD)
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this is the hard part :(
go thru EVERYTHING in your fridge and write down every single item! leave the veggies + fruit until last!
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(i wrote down chopped garlic bc it's in a jar and lasts a long time)
now at the bottom put the veggies and fruit!
write down "purchased" instead of expiry date! fruit+veg go bad quite quickly (and sometimes dont have best before dates written on them) so thats why i do it differently!
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now go down your top list of food products and find the expiry dates on all your items! write those down to the right!
if the date is passed, decide whether it is still good. if it is no good, toss it :( if it's still edible, write down the due date and make sure you know it's from THIS year. (i put a little /20 to show it's from 2020)
if the due date is like two years from now, just write down the year lol (ex. maple syrup - 2022)
if the due date is next year, make sure u know that but still write down the proper due date w month + day! (i write mar 08/21 for example (march 8, 2021))
next step is to write down when you bought those veggies (or at least a good guess)
ur board should look smth like this (probably MUCH longer, i just did this as an example lol)
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good? alright NEXT STEP. which due dates are past? mark those with a RED chunky line!
which due dates are this month/soon? mark those with an ORANGE thin line!
which veggies were bought a couple weeks ago? mark those w a RED line! (depends on the veg/fruit! know how long ur stuff is good for!)
which veggies were bought a week ago? mark those w an ORANGE line! (same bracketed sentence as above lol)
here's my example! (today is Sept 6, 2020)
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OKAY GOOD? GOOD!!! im proud of you!!! look at u go getting ur life in order!!! WOO!!! 💗
next we're going to do the freezer!
unpack that babey especially if she's FULL!! we want to see every piece of her!! no items hidden!
write down EVERYTHING you have in there! i dont worry too much about expiry dates because it's frozen and i usually use everything up within a couple months of the initial freezing LOL
instead of expiry dates, i write amount! for instance, if i have three english muffins frozen up in there, I'll write "English Muffins x3"
if I have one and a half pounds of ground beef, I'll write down "Gr Beef 1 1/2 lbs" and maybe also a purchase date since meat does go bad faster :(
if the amount isnt important or I don't really know it (like a bag of berries) then I'll just leave it blank! no big dealio! 😊
then I'll put a red or orange mark next to whatever i need to use up soon bc it's been sitting in the freezer for a while!
here's an example pic in case u need it!!
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(the 1/2 lb of gr beef is circled bc i have two packages that need to be used, one is 1 lb and the other is a half pound, and i know the half pound needs to be used soon but not the 1 pound!)
The reason I do this on a whiteboard is bc it's easier for multiple colours PLUS the biggest thing: ERASING! changing! and if i make a mistake? just erase and write it again LOL
~~~
ALRIGHT THATS IT LADS!! GOOD LUCK!!! hmu if u need help or have a question!! if u have any organization issues u want help with lemme know and I'll try to come up w something!! 💗💪😤 get out there and punch life in the gut!!!
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x-useobwa-x · 5 years
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༄ are you mad? | 너 화났어?
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Jungkook x Reader
➺ Word count: + 1k
╰Due to his PC being broken, Jungkook finds himself visiting the internet cafe daily for hours to play Overwatch. He's an outstanding player, by far better than many of his teammates and he carries his games, but there's one player he always encounters over and over again.
a/n: yooo! I've been itching to write this short thing for a while already! It's nothing special or anything, but I really enjoyed it! It was a nice change from my usual stuff! 🤧👌🏼
Start reading!
⇣ ⇣ ⇣ ⇣ ⇣ ⇣
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Jesus fucking christ.
„Fuck!“ he curses under his breath.
This is the seventh time he got sniped down out of the blue and everytime he peeks at the kill-feed, he's burning with rage.
It's the same name. All over again, he's getting killed by the same goddamn player. This has been going on since the day his PC broke.
How it broke in the first place? Well, in his opinion it was because of said player. Even while he was playing at home, he already got hunted down by that one person behind the screen somewhere in the world, making him question all the talent he actually has. At some point he got so angry that he lost his control and kept kicking his computer, loaded with rage.
This is now two weeks ago, and he can't get over the fact that this guy is better than him. Usually he would look up to these better than him, but with this goddamn little shit he just can't get any clear thoughts.
He's so fixated on finding the enemies' Widowmaker that he got too careless and- shoot.
„What the FUCK,“ he yells into his headset, having the majority of the internet cafe turning around and giving him looks.
This damn guy.
Venom. Once again, it was Venom that shot him down.
‚I'm so sick and tired of this dude. Jesus fucking christ.‘
Jungkook is far beyond reaching his limit. This has to be settled, once and for good. He's furiously typing something down in the game-chat.
[Seagull: yo venom, after this game, let's go 1vs1 and lets put an end to this. Its been weeks and you can't seem to fucking stop.]
[Venom: lol what you so triggered for. its just a game bro.]
‚It's just a game? Jesus christ. This... this dude really is something.‘
[Seagull: are you scared?]
[Venom: nope. just not serious about this game. but if you insist, lol sure.]
Jungkook is evily grinning to himself.
This will be the last time he'll get his ass whooped by Venom. That dude might be good with 5 other players on his team that distract Jungkook, but on a 1vs1 battle he definitely will have the upper hand.
„Kook are you sure you want to do that?“ Seokjin calls out to him through the voice chat.
„Yeah I am. I am so sick of getting my ass beaten by that kid, I have to.“
„Well, good luck, because the game's ending now.“
Jungkook doesn't fucking care. He just wants to settle this. He has to show off that he's better, he has to-
‚What the actual fuck?‘
Now he's really pissed. As soon as the game finishes and the ‚Play of the game‘ comes up, he has to fight the urge to throw away the keyboard.
The recap shows one of the many times Venom has shot him down, and it wasn't even a good one in Jungkooks opinion.
[Seagull: wow kinda sad that you got the POTG with that.]
[Venom: you butthurt or smth?]
„B-butthurt??“ he scoffs. „This little...“
„Well. See you, Kook. Good luck with Venom.“ Seokjin says and leaves the group.
He's waiting. He's waiting for Venom to invite him into a private game so he can restore his pride. He is butthurt, but that doesn't mean that he has to admit that to everyone.
[GROUP INVITATION FROM VENOM]
,Finally. Took him long enough.‘ is all he thinks as he clicks ,accept‘.
[Venom: widowmaker 1vs1?]
[Seagull: yes ofc]
[Venom: lol aight]
As both of them enter the game, Jungkooks fingers are itching to turn this around.
‚5...4...3...2...1...go!‘ the game counts down and both of them rush out of their bases to hide.
Jungkook is concentrating with all he has while he zooms into his scope as he tries to track down Venom.
„There you are,“ he whispers as he finds the hated enemy and slowly moves his cursor to steady his aim on Venoms head.
‚Gotcha!‘
Jungkook immediately takes the lead. He's feeling so content right now- they're roughly 20 seconds in and he already shot him down. Using the time until Venom respawns, he repositions himself and hides, scope fixated in the direction of the enemy's base.
‚Come out, come on, show yourself.‘
Just as he finished his thought, he gets shot, and Jungkook can‘t help but stare in disbelief. Where the fuck did he hide? Why didn't he see him? He hates to admit it, but that was a very good play.
[Seagull: yo wtf. that was actually sick,,,]
[Venom: thx broski]
[Seagull: nah we aint bros man. but still, that was dope as fuck.]
The game keeps going like this; both are pretty much equally good, and Jungkook hates that he realizes that. Well, at least he isn't worse. But what actually is worse, is that he starts enjoying playing with Venom. It has been ages that Jungkook met someone that could keep up with his skill.
It stands 29-29 right now, the game limit being 30 kills. This is now going to decide things.
[Venom: this is actually pretty fun. i mean, i have my cursor on your head for the past 2 minutes but i don't want to shoot, i'on want this to be over yet]
[Seagull: ikr, tbh i even feel bad for all the hate and the tons of reports i sent in because of you lmao]
[Venom: EXCUSE ME WHAT CNXND YOU REPORTED ME??? YOU ASSHAT I GOT EXP PENALTY BECAUSE OF YOU I—]
[Seagull: ,,,sOrry??? idk man you really pissed me off ajfksk i hated that you were better its not even that you were better its just that you were always so cOckY OOF i hated it but ur actually?? pretty fun??]
[Venom: lol i'm sorry but your reactions always were gold kfkdls]
[Seagull: yea i,,, i can see that LOL i got pretty worked up. I even crushed my computer in anger oops]
[Venom: you did wHat]
[Seagull: HFKDKDL LET ME BE]
Jungkook is smiling to himself. This guy isn't all too bad after all. Not even half as cocky as he thought. Maybe he'd even end up teaming up with him some time. That thought is immediately cancelled again, though.
Suddenly, his character falls, shot down by the person he just praised for not being as bad as he initially thought. Fuck that.
[Seagull: WHAT THE FUCK BRUH??]
[Venom: lol i thought i'm not your bro]
[Seagull: yEah NOT ANYMORE NOW,,,]
[Venom: are you mad?]
[Seagull: uhh y e s ?? I thought we didn't want to finish this fkdkls]
[Venom: IM SORRY BUT YOUR REACTIONS REALLY JUST ARE SO GOOD I CANT HELP IT-]
Jungkook sighs. He wants to be pissed, but he can't really. He knows it was just meant as a joke, but still, that means the game is over now, and he's kind of feeling sad.
[Seagull: yo... you maybe wanna stay in the group and keep talking a bit? y'know, just being on the title screen and ,,, t a l k]
[Venom: u mean voice chat?]
[Seagull: yea i mean if you want to,,,]
[Venom: uhh sure why not]
Jungkook enables the voice chat and waits for Venom to do the same.
As soon as he gets the notification that his new mate joined the voice chat, there's some sort of awkward silence; it seems like neither of them wants to go first, but then they happen to start talking at the same time.
„Uhh hello?“
„Uhm, hi?“
Silence. Jungkooks eyes widen an unreal amount and his mouth slightly falls open.
There are two things that he would like to point out. First, the voice belongs to a girl, which he didn't expect at all. But the second thing is, that the voice came from nowhere else than the booth right next to him.
He jumps out of his chair and watches as you do the exact same- and there you both are, looking at each other like two idiots.
„You- you're Venom??“
„You are Seagull? Dude we've been both coming here everyday sitting in the same damn places??“
„As if I didn't figure that yet. What the- so you are the person that keeps hunting me down?“ he says as if he's just figured out all the mysteries of the world.
„What do you mean ‚hunting you down‘? YOU are hunting me down!“
The both of you stare at each other, pouts on your faces before you burst into laughter.
What the actual fuck is happening right now? An hour ago he wished to rip the gamer that goes by the name Venom into pieces, and now he's standing infront of you and your smile and the melody of your laughter is sending his stomach tingling. Is this what people call ‚love at the first sight‘? Because if so, that's definitely what's happening right now. A girl? Not to mention a very beautiful one? Playing his favorite game almost better than he himself does? And on top of that she's funny and seems nice so far? He'd be damned if he'd let this opportunity slide. He could be living the dream of many, many men and he's not one to pass a chance he'd like to take.
„You know, what do you think about us just logging out for now and grab a coffee together? Getting to know each other and continuing our talk offline?“ he smirks, eyes big and full of hope.
„Hmm, I guess that does sound fair, I mean, I owe you one for all the teasing and for your broken computer, huh?“
„You totally do,“ he says as a wide smile starts spreading across his lips.
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jooheongif · 6 years
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it's theory anon,hi!!how are YOU?i'm really good rn thanks:)) thank you for your kindness again,i'm really happy i could somehow help to help you feel even a tiny bit better and hope you're doing well now,too(and it's ok to not rest on your day off but it's also ok to do so if that's what you feel is right for you atm!).about the mf(ilm), i thought the same thing, it felt like a parallel universe type of story!i also really love plotlines about friendship, (again cont.i'll try to be briefer!)
(i’m so sorry i wrote a rly long reply so i’m gonna put this under read more !!)
2. friendship is beautiful and i feel oftentimes underappreciated(but not mx!there they go again being amazing) so i love the concept. personally i like not knowing what exactly the producers were thinking because having my own interpretation of something and seeing other ppl have their own fills me with wonder,like,that's art!so many people think so many different things and no one's wrong i love it!!your thoughts about them appreciating everything they've done so far,you're absolutely right(cont) 3. i hope they are able to bc everything's so hectic for the.i get lost just looking at their official schedule,i don't know how they do it but i also hope they are aware of all these things bc those are all mindblowingly huge accomplishments in my opinion and i just want them to feel like their hard work is worth it,yknow?(is this comprehensible?)and i know they feel pressure because as you said the business is nasty but yea i hope at the end of the day they can feel like (cont.???again 4. everything they've put so much of themselves into is worth it,i love their energy and fierce determination and i just don't want them to lose it but maybe as you said feel less pressured..but then the only way would realistically be to make sure they get awarded in the Real World so we're all doing our best in the system&hating it as you said:/ they just mean so much to so many people i want them to feel that too!i try to contain myself but here i go again! sorry it's so long AND i have more(con 5. also!thank you for your big reply and sharing your thoughts i mostly just agreed with (but you're right so what else can i do),i don't have mbb friends to vent to and fanperson(is there a gender neutral term for fanboy/fangirl?) over mx with and this is really nice and fulfilling(again,if i'm boring you,you can just delete the messages and not reply!) so THANKS!it's great to strive to be a better person but i feel like one(you) should also acknowledge the good things they're already doing(cont?) 6. you showed such pure kindness and really melted someone's(my) heart and that's a Big Deal!djkghddgwe can agree that we both inspired each other :') also please i feel like you're such a wonderful soul and you really deserve every bit of gratitude and appreciation i managed to express(i feel a lot moreprobably) so!yeah!reminder that you're lovely and deserve to be appreciated and i'm also very,very happy you're here!you made my day brighter for the 2nd time now wow!thanks! i hope you and(cont.:() 7. your gorgeous heart are taking good care and enjoying your day/night! and this cb!i really like it i haven't had time to listen to the entire album but jealousy!is a bop honestly it's my type of jam and the choreo is stunning and so are their voices!iwas so skeptical about the lyrics(they could've been like hero or stuck and those made me a bit >:/ honestly) but i really should've known they wouldn't fail me in any way ever!i can't wait to hear the rest of the songs i hope you enjoy them too!bye
hi theory anon, it's nice to hear from u again ! firstly, i am so sorry for the slow reply to this ! but im rly glad to know that u are doing good :-) i'm doing ok too thank u !! how are u ? kfjjfdsjfdf sorry that u had to read my tags but thank u for saying that !! i just feel so guilty when i do nothing bc im absolutely terrified of time passing too quickly ? just the thought of letting a few minutes go to waste is overwhelming ? even though i know it's not rational to think like this but ??? theres just this constant feeling that im running out of time so i try to get rid of it by always doing smth ?? and feel bad when i dont ? idk ?? but anyway im working on it and ill be ok ! sorry..not to be dramatic and tmi and all that kjdfdj istg this blog gives me too much freedom to say...too much :( (hope the internet folks that collect metadata never read the garbage i write bc..yikes they aren't gonna hav the best time) anyway..yea. what a paragraph to start off this reply :( sorry for the honesty and saying so much all the time btw :( not that being honest is necessarily a bad thing but ! idk every time i write smth i suddenly feel extra self conscious and feel like deleting it bc im rly embarrassed and always end up having big regret later when i reread anything ive typed up !! but i just keep writing them anyway bc...idk ?? i'd rly hate it if someone got discouraged from sharing their thoughts/worries/feelings which i think is a rly important human thing :( so  yea im rly embarrassed w anything i write but i'll keep doing it anyway bc i'm all for that kind of stuff and sometimes i know its not easy and it takes someone a lot to share that and its a good thing and i dont ever want anyone to feel discouraged from doing that ! anyway i just felt like i rly needed to say all of this..but pls dont feel obliged to reply to this mess !! anyway back to mx ! you are right :( i also hope mx feel like what they've done is worth smth w/e their definition or standard of that is :( like.. all of the hard work they've put into being mx it certainly means so much to fans but i hope all the hard work they've put into being mx also means smth to them at the end of the day and they are happy w what they're doing and what they've achieved so far :( and yes we'd love mx to always be rewarded in the real world :( though we love them and we want to get them a win, i know that everyone has their commitments, means and different circumstances and we can only do so much :( but even if u think its just a small contribution, everything adds up and counts and i know that all mbb hav contributed in some way in helping them get another win for this cb ! there are some mbb who can't buy albums or streaming passes and things and i hope they don't feel bad for this :( even if all you can do is watch the mv once or twice, even if you could only vote, i hope you know that it all counts and matters !! abt mx's schedule, i get tired just by looking at their weekly one idk how they can even put up w it all ?? after this they'll hav their japanese album and things and then they'll have their concerts and on top of all that apparently [some of them are also studying] ????? they are so hardworking :( HOW do they do it !! just..thinking abt their schedule is overwhelming !!! also pls dont think that you're boring me or anything like that :( im so thankful for any msg i receive and the fact that u actually took the time to type out smth to send to me ?? im so grateful ?? u are never boring !! honestly even if u sent me a stainless steel dishwasher manual w the page length of like..23 bibles, i'd still love u for it and i'd prob read all of it :( btw thank u sm for saying all those kind things !!! receiving kindness for the 3rd time is rly !!!!!!! and once again i've done nothing to deserve it :( i dont even know what i can say to you that will ever be enough to thank u again or to top what u hav already said ! if there was like a...maslows hierarchy of kindness of smth, ur at the very top of that triangle and anything i say will never be as kind as what you have said !! for you, i can agree that we both inspired each other :-) but really thank u so much from the bottom of my heart :( i hope you know how kind and lovely u are too ! if nobody told u this today, i wanted to say that im rly grateful to know u and i'm happy that you're here !! thank u again for being so kind and thoughtful and for making me smile !! :( same, i havent properly listened to the whole album either bc ive just been letting it stream in the background (but i dont count that as a proper listen unless i listen w headphones tbh) ill give it a good listen one day ! also im a repeat 1 kind of garbage person until i feel the need to listen to a new song ?? and rn jealousy to me is a song that gets better w every listen ??? shes too powerful atm :( one day ill listen to another song but today is not that day ! Actually.....I think jealousy is my fav mx song ???? before this cb i didnt hav a fav bc i couldnt pick the song i liked most out of blue moon/blind/fighter/incomparable. i was just gonna base it off the one w the most play count out of those 4 but now i know its jealousy ! what are ur fav mx songs ?? btw i know im always saying that anything mx releases is always a masterpiece no matter what, but in all seriousness its ok if u didn't like smth they released. i don't think it makes u any less of a mbb if u didn't enjoy a certain release or if u only liked one aspect of a thing but not so much the rest of the thing. anyway not to sound so...stale and commonplace but for lack of a better word/sentence, at the end of the day your own reactions and feelings to a piece of art like music...it's all just subjective isnt it ?? not liking that thing doesnt mean that its not a masterpiece or its any less of a masterpiece to someone else either so !! it's ok !! anyway this is rly....ive written a lot and its all over the place and incoherent probably :( i'm sorry !! feel free to reply whenever u feel like it, or no pressure on never replying at all btw ! also feel free to disagree w anything i say ! thank u sm for talking to me abt mx bc ive also got no mbb friends so !!! thank you :( theres so many times where i rly want to start a conversation w someone but im too scared and also i've got no clue abt how to initiate conversation ! and the times when i do manage to...i get stuck on how to keep the conversation going ? but when i figure smth out then im coming for u @ friendship !! i hope u had a good weekend and that you got some rest and that ur doing ok wherever u are !! until next time, take care ❤️❤️❤️
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sunnysidewrites · 7 years
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Enemies to Lovers!Subin
Requested by anon: enemies to lovers au with subin from victon??? thank u!!! 
here you go sunflower anon pt 2 LOL!!! YOUR REQUEST BLEW THROUGH THE ROOF SO MANY PPL WANTED THIS WOW STAN TALENT STAN KINGS AKA VICTON!!! WE NEED MORE WRITERS FOR VICTON AND I WILL DO IT MYSELF!!!!!! i also really love other victon writers you guys are the mvps i love u!!!! AND JUST LIKE I PROMISED THIS IS THE 2ND IMAGINE I’M DROPPING TODAY!!!!!! HAPPY READING MY CHILDREN!!!!!
warnings: cUTE BABY SUBIN V V CUTE SUBIN!!!!
wHAT A CONCEPT
THIS IS GONNA BE MY FIRST PUBLISHED VICTON IMAGINE AAAAAAAA
STAN ROOKIE KINGS YALL PLS STOP SLEEPING ON THEM
THIS GOT MORE VOTES THAN I THOUGHT TOO YOU GUYS ARE #WOKE
You’ve always been gr8 at school
You exceed in academics, sports, extracurriculars you are the Full Package
But you might have just met your match when a Jung Subin came into your life
He has literally only been at your school for 3 hours and everyone’s already fawning over him
“Omg did you meet the new kid?? He is sO CUTE AND NICE”
“That subin guy is really nice”
“I wanna keep him in my pocket” LMAO SAME
And he just sounds like a freaking angel
You’re like well i didn’t meet the guy yet so i can’t judge him based off of these
Turns out he’s in your writing class
Writing class is your fav bc it’s your strongest suit and you’re just super confident no one is gonna take your place as #1
Welp hahahah
Subin waltzes in and just kinda does that
likE GDI SUBIN FIRST YOU’RE AN ANGEL AND NOW YOU TAKE MY SPOT SMH
He seems to have a nice smile but,,, when he makes eye contact with you,,,, you  could feel the ice
And you’re like this boi doesn’t even know me??? What is his deal???
He knows you’re gonna be his competition bc he has already been informed about you
Well actually your friend was telling him about you but whatever
And he’s like wO WZERZ SHE IS PRETTY AND CUTE BUT MOVE ASIDE HONEY THERE’S A NEW SHERIFF IN TOWN
As class resumes after his introduction, you’re like ok whatevz i won’t let this weirdo get in the way of My Happiness™
When you get your assignments back a few classes later, your teacher is all gushing about someone’s work
And you’re like lmao!! I know thank you!!
“What a real piece of work!! Subin have you considered joining our school newspaper?”
aND YOU’RE FLIPPING OUT LIKE W HA T SU B I N????????????
And your classmates are like ooo shhiiiitttttt y/n has been replaced
And yoU’RE LIKE UM EXCUSE U i WILL NoT have my pride destroyed like this
And subin is just smirking like lmao ye that’s right boi i snatched it
And you’re like ??????????? get out u wish honey??????????
And from that point on you’re like this b is gonna go down i am gonna pull out all the sTOPS WA T C H ME
Your teacher and your classmates are just like pl s,,, chill,,,, it’s literally just creative writing,,,,,
You & subin: nO I WANNA BE THE VERY BEST gotta go
“tHIS AIN’T POKEMON IT’S AN ELECTIVE”
You guys are just at each other’s throats and you both try to one-up the other so hard but it always results in the both of you tied
Your teacher is like ok u kno wat
“Class, we’ll be mixing things up a little for this assignment. You’re gonna get into pairs or groups!! And don’t even pick your partners i already have them picked lmao”
You & subin: w HA T
The rest of the class: …….yikes
Your teacher and the rest of the class lowkey ship yall
And ofc,,,, you ended up with the one person you didn’t want,,,,,
“Ugh ok let’s just try to get this over with”
“Fine whatever”
the prompt involves writing a short story where person A and person B meet under the most unlikely circumstances and take a disliking at first sight but they grow closer and actually start falling love
And one partner writes person A’s perspective and the other writes person B’s
And you and subin are like jesus christ
So you’re like ok i’ll do person A then and subin is like sure whatevz
And you guys start brainstorming for the core of the plot
Class ends but you still haven’t gotten too far in brainstorming so you’re like sigh,,, ok well,,, we’re gonna have to meet up outside of school to work on this,,,,, we don’t have much time to work on this in class
And he’s like ugh,,,,, you’re right,,,,,
So you guys plan to meet a local cafe later that week to crank it out
As you’re getting dressed you’re like what should i wear
Would this be too casual
Is this dressing up too much
And you’re like wa i t lmao it’s just subin what am i doing!! :)))
But you’re also like im gonna wear that cute skirt
When you get there, subin has already picked out a table and spread out his things
“Sorry were you waiting that long?”
And he kINDA JUMPS LIKE O JESUS
You’re like why are you so jumpy??? It’s not like you weren’t expecting me to come????
And he’s like it’s no t h in g let’s just get started!!
You just shrug it off and start taking out your materials too
And you’re like ok wait i probably need to buy a drink so that we can stay here for longer do u want anything
And he’s like ya sure get me a mocha frappe or smth
And you’re like w h a t,,,,, i love that drink,,,,,,,
“With whipped cream?”
“yES O M G”
You’re literally bonding over a coffee drink i just???
And you can see his eyes forming into little crescents cause he’s smILING I’M SO SOFT OMG
And your heart is doing some somersaults and you’re like aahahhahsjdffljdljd i’ll be back bye
When you return with both of your drinks he’s like :)))!!!
“Thanks!! So for the part when they meet --”
And you guys spend literally hours and you’re just like ok,,, let’s,,, just take a breather,,,, and get some lunch or smth
And he’s like yea my brain is fried
You guys start packing your things and move to a little restaurant down the block 
You & subin: is this,, like,,, a date,,,, wth,,,,
And you guys spend your lunch laughing and making jokes while adding more ideas to your story
You finish your meal and you’re like ok well,,,, i think we practically laid out all the necessary details now we just gotta work on our own part
And he’s like yea,,,, i guess this is where we go,,,,
And you’re both reluctant to leave bc,,, hanging out with the other wasn’t the most horrible thing ever,,,,,
You’re unsure of whether to hug him goodbye or just leave so you hesitate for a second more and just decide to wave him goodbye
And he waVES BACK HOW CUTE SLDFJFJDF
You go home and you’re like ,,,,,,,,,,,,oh my god did that just happen
Subin at home: that really happened wow
You sit yourself down at your desk and you’re ready to go into Writing Mode this assignment is due in a day it’s time to go hAM
And you get so caught up in working that by the time you finish you’re like oMG I NEED TO GO TO BED
You sleep quite soundly that night bc you’re very satisfied with your product
Can’t relate lol :)))
The following day you and subin turn it into your teacher and your teacher is like i hope there were no complications!!!
And you and subin are like nope,,,, it went pretty smoothly actually,,,
Teacher + class: w HA T
“O-oh okay that’s good to hear! Anyways let’s take a quick break before launching into our work today. I’ll read some of these stories out loud!”
When she reaches your story, she pauses as she scans through it
And you and subin are lowkey holding your breath
Her mouth and eyes are a little wide open
She starts reading it and you can see your classmates being sh O OK
And your classmates can already tell who wrote it bc it’s just so obvious
She gets near the end of your short story and it talks about a cafe date
And when she reads person B’s perspective IT ALSO HAS A CAFE D A TE
*eyes emoji*
“His company wasn’t bad. Not bad at all.” -- the last sentence of yours
“She turned around and went on her way, and all I could think about was how many more times I would see that same back walking.” -- the last sentence of his
I AM SHOOK BY THIS FAKE SHORT STORY LMAO
Everyone is just like holy crap pls don’t read the rest of ours we are ashAMED
When class ends, you’re about to leave and go to the parking lot but subin stops you
“Hey,,, so,,,,,”
“So,,,,,”
“Would you,,, wanna have another cafe date,,,,,,,,,,,”
“,,,,,,,,if you want,,,,,,,”
And you’re both so shy and start blushing and giggling a little here and there OSJLFLJDSJL SO CUTE
“Well, your company really isn’t bad at all” you say with a wink
And just like that you turn around, leaving a starstruck Subin
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fmchiwon · 7 years
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hello babies !!! i’m jin and this is the loml ryu chiwon aka c.won ( nineteen, model / child actor, elite’s lead dancer & vocal, and the sweetest boy to ever exist ) nD I RLY SHOULDN’T BE JOINING bc school n exams are a goddamn mess thnx ***………..but i still love u dw anw i��m here and i’m super hyped!!! u can find me on discord or twt (u can ask me for either!!) but i’ll mostly be on the im’s jsghfhdj . like this post pls and i’ll (v eagerly) come to you to plot!!! meanwhile u can find chiwon’s bio here and plots here (wip!) for ur viewing pleasure but w/o further ado here is some stuff abt him under the cut!
#1
just clearing stuff up bc his bio wasn’t that explicit and detailed! 
has been in the industry since he was five unfortunately n started out as a child model / actor
his family wasn’t that well-off but his parents had big dreams!!!! big hopes!!!! just……. not for themselves but for him…… mostly bc they missed their chance to shine a long time ago so now they’re projecting their aspirations onto him aka using him as an outlet to fulfil their dreams smh
he signed on with hjh ent at first but he found it so ?? stifling ???? esp since he had to grow up under the limelight and it was altogether just Tiring
modelling n stuff rlly took a toll on him bc he was expected to manage himself even at a young age and it stressed him out ??? ? ? ? so much, altho he got to hang out w the #starz but yea not enough compensation
it was kinda expected that along the way he discovered a passion for dance?? like i mean he was surrounded by idols…. and he often skipped modelling / acting lessons just to watch the sunbaes in the practice rooms
so he was more than happy when his contract was set to expire when he was 15,, he got the fuck out of that hellhole even tho his mom disapproved
their relationship has been tense ever since, mostly bc they lost their main source of income and she doesnt rly talk to him unless for him to send money back to their family
kinda has beef with hjh now, doesn’t make a habit of associating w them much. as a result, there have been like…….. wild rumors abt his absence and leave from the company
but in aug/sept of 2012, he secretly went for an audition that worldwide media was having, and entered as a trainee in october with dance
yeh now he’s here anxiously waiting for elite’s debut
#2
if u knew him, u’d be surprised at how much on-camera chiwon = off-camera chiwon
the only difference that on camera chiwon is calmer and kinda intimidating bc his stage presence is off the charts?? 
but his smile is one of the first things people notice simply bc of how prominent and bright it is, n he’s vvvvv charismatic and always makes u feel like the most important person in the world whenever he talks to u bc he focuses all his attention on u
he’s literally always the epitome of bubbly and affable, whether u know him personally or not!! v playful friendly and energetic and always tries to see the best in people, it’s almost to the point which it’s unrealistic
never seen without a smile on his face, he always has enough love to go around. constantly the moodmaker!!! he’s super perceptive to his surroundings so once he senses the atmosphere going down he’s immediately there to bring it up
doesn’t seem forced at all, 100% genuine and ppl actually doubt him for it bc how has the cruelty of the industry not wear you down?
but ha it actually has, he’s actually hella insecure about a lot of things except that he doesn’t let anyone in on his feelings, cries a lot into his pillow when he thinks no one’s around and makes sure that he’s always bright and happy the next day
he never lets anyone even think for a second that he’s upset or smth though, whatever he does feels really genuine
on a s/n Drop Dead Gorgeous is he even real
LIKE FOR REAL HE’S SO FUCKIN HANDSOME 2017 adonis @ his finest
knows how to make everyone happy (except for himself…..) and in a way its a substitute for him to fill up on his own deprivation of love n happiness
but he has the biggest heart, tries to take time out to help everyone when he can, and is super affectionate and can come off as overbearing / overwhelming at times
but he’s also a Heartbreaker ; /  mostly bc he’s super nice n flirty to everyone and it can be kinda misleading at times? BUT ITS NOT INTENTIONAL especially since he doesn’t seem to understand that it’s not ok to go around dropping random kisses on people and proclaiming his love for them all the time
once secretly dated a female trainee to protect her from the company finding out that she was gay
but that quickly turned into rumors wherein he dated another male trainee which….. may not be entirely false
a good friend, will always make time to listen to u and offer comfort
in a lot of ways he’s like a shelter and has been described as such by a lot of people that are close to him? mostly bc of how reliable and sturdy he is and how much he’s willing to take just about everyone in
haha but when he gets angry thats a whole different story
has the ability to stand up for others and will never hesitate to do so, esp if he doesn’t like what ur doing. he’s v stubborn and strongly-opinionated, however he’s almost always unable to stand up for himself, and instead he absorbs all the criticism he hears and takes it to heart
humble to the point of demeaning. he doesn’t believe that he would even be here without his members and (family…..ish)
gets a lot of hate for his singing bc when knetz heard his voice in one of their earlier releases they were like uhhhhhhhhh whomst and got a lot of criticism, mostly bc they think he’s just another untalented pretty face and that’s it
like but he’s constantly improving? and he rlly rlly works super hard to be better, and now he even drops small covers sometimes
ok but dance is the goddamn love of his life )-: posts a lot of dance covers and choreographs some dances too!
tries to contribute by learning how to compose and write lyrics, he’s constantly learning n experimenting w the help of the staff and his group members
SPEAKING OF WHICH he’s a total softie 4 them ok like to the level where he would give anything up for his members they’re his FAMILY n literally the only ppl who he’s ever seen him down
v loud, makes his presence known almost immediately
also he’s so!!!!! boyfriend!!!!!! icb
a TREE he’s so tall smh (perfect 4 u to lean on, cuddle, and be the small spoon to)
fashion is another passion of his, his entire wardrobe = fashion week all year long
a little hard to get super, seriously close to though bc of how much he bottles up inside himself. but he’s a little way too trusting and that fact gets taken advantage of a lot
has pet names for everyone
looks like he cant be taken srsly but he’s really observant and sharp, listens and watches his surroundings and hence he can AND will use ur words against u if u go against them
HE’S JUST A SWEETHEART TRYING 2 MAKE IT IN THIS JUNGLE OK thank u <3
if u read till here u deserve a gold medal
#3
i’m rly just here to develop my chara so i’m definitely open to any kind of plots at all! i mean it when i say that so plsplspls hmu w any ideas u may have whatsoever!!! or at least until i sort out a proper plots page or smth yikes…
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likeawildthing · 7 years
Text
one week since u looked at me
James and LIly fight and it’s 100% the other person’s fault, and everyone is just a little bit unhinged. 
3371 Words
For @expressopatronum​, who requested a jily fic based on the Barenaked Ladies song. :D
tues.
James Potter to M8S B4 D8S: well. Fuck.
James Potter: im broken up
James Potter: literally
James Potter: and metaphorically
James Potter: and every other kind of shitty ally tbh
James Potter: hello?????
James Potter: im in Crisis here
Peter Pettigrew: we know, mate. You ok?
James Potter: how??
Peter Pettigrew: well…
James Potter: she texted u???
Remus Lupin: she texted me
Peter Pettigrew: then he told us
Remus Lupin: wtf, Prongs
James Potter: u believe her???
Remus Lupin: didn’t say that, mate. Just a weird situation, yeah??
James Potter: Weird = shitty, then yea. her fault tho for being so dramatic!! And do u arseholes have a group chat w/out me???
Sirius Black: nah. y would we do smth like that to u prongs. go chill @ mine. AND i for one am being a good mate and withholding judgment. (except on evans cos shes clearly at fault here)
James Potter: damn straight she is. 100%!!! and im already @ urs, actually. where r u tho?
Sirius Black: alcohol
James Potter: Good Man
Remus Lupin: I’m getting pizza
James Potter: don’t bother?? never eating again
James Potter: PS no more talking to evans unless its for espionage
Peter Pettigrew: this should be fun
 - - -
 James Potter to Not Lovely Lily: ready for ur apology, like, whenever, babe
James Potter: no?
James Potter: sirius’s sofa is super fucking cosy, btw
James Potter: PS whatever the current differences between us, pls dont stoop so low as to eat Mums biscuits
wed.
 Lily Evans to StupidHair BigMouth: the biscuits were fucking delicious.
James Potter: WOW
- - -
Sirius Black to squatter potter: BABE. u know i theoretically want to be sympathetic to ur emo angst. or whatever. but y the FUCK r u watching x-files at half volume at 3:37 fucking am
James Potter: go back to sleep??
Sirius Black: fucking difficult w the light coming in under my door
Sirius Black: AND u mess up my recs w that shit
James Potter: ill tell pete u think x-files is shit
James Potter: PS dana Scully is /not shit
Sirius Black: the redhead???
Sirius Black: fuckall, prongs, if ur watching the show bc she has red hair
James Potter: im NOT. watching bc it’s a Good show.
Sirius Black: is not
James Potter: it holds up!!
Sirius Black: fine. im not arguing w u bc u cant take the blow of being wrong. i get it. but if u wank to sculley on my sofa, potter, ill end you.
James Potter: u wldnt
Sirius Black: imported velvet. vintage. custom ticking. turned legs. u know how i feel abt that lounge, Babe.
James Potter: /i wldnt
Sirius Black: …
James Potter: k. ill stop
Sirius Black: damn straight. uve been broken up for a day??
James Potter: 31.25 hrs. n we ARENT broken up
Sirius Potter: whatever. make up with evans or im kicking you out
James Potter: what happened to being a good mate????
Sirius Black: making up w evans is whats good for u
James Potter: u know its not that simple.
Sirius Black: if ur waiting for me to ask u WHY its not simple….dont. shldve done that when lupin was here.
James Potter: i /did. i still need to process tho.
Sirius Black: process alone, w the volume below 12 & ur prick IN your pants!
Sirius Black: and reset xfiles to s6e4
- - -
James Potter to #1 MUM <333: mum…you up?
Euphemia Potter: no
James Potter: …wow
James Potter: Good to know whose side ur on???
Euphemia Potter: I’m staying neutral.
James Potter: can you at least make me more biscuits?
Euphemia Potter: no. I gave her permission to eat them. James Potter: p sure that’s taking sides!!!
James Potter: are u talking to her right now???
Euphemia Potter: Her mother has passed, dear. She relies on me for situations like this.
James Potter: WOW
Euphemia Potter: weren’t you just here asking for your grandmother’s engagement ring last week?
James Potter: yes!!
Euphemia Potter: Perhaps you should come over for breakfast tomorrow.
James Potter: no
James Potter: …ill think about it
- - -
Sirius Black to squatter potter: DID I JUST HEAR U FUCKING GROAN
thurs.
James Potter to Babe: listen…sorry abt the sofa thing
James Potter: maybe outta line a bit. I wont watch xfiles tonight tho
James Potter: i can come over tonight, right???
Sirius Black: imported vintage italian velvet lounges b4 m8s
- - -
James Potter to sailor moony: and fuck, like. she deadass looked at me and said ‘im angry’ what does that even mean??? How can she be angry at an accident??
Remus Lupin: Prongs. uve told me this 12 times 
James Potter: seven. my soul splits every time I tell it, so id know
James Potter: fuck
James Potter: LUPIN
James Potter: if u dont answer ill stop supplying ur Weetabix Habit
Remus Lupin: You wouldn’t. You know why??? its 3 in the morning. I didn’t sleep bc two nights ago u were making us listed to the Lily Playlist. Last night Padfoot wldnt stop texting me abt u watching x-files (???) and tonight…I NEED SLEEP 
James Potter: ur right. im not heartless.
James Potter: unlike evans
James Potter: i /am desperate tho
James Potter: if u answer, i wont come over and bug u in person.
Remus Lupin: Deal. So what else did she say?
James Potter: thats it!
Remus Lupin: normal voice, or scary quiet rage voice?
James Potter: wld i be texting u @3am if it was the normal one?
Remus Lupin: fair point…just surprised that’s all she said, considering you killed her pet
James Potter: first mum, now u?? i went to breakfast w/ her this morning and she AMUSHED ME!! ddnt even make bacon! a two hr lecture and No Bacon.
James Potter: over a fish! Remus Lupin: lily’s fish. which u killed. James Potter: it was a tragic, unavoidable accident!!
James Potter: ac·ci·dent 1. an unfortunate incident that happens unexpectedly and unintentionally, typically resulting in damage or injury. google does not lie.
James Potter:  anyway thts what i get for doing Chores and trying to help around the flat
James Potter: i can feel ur disapproval, lupin
James Potter: she LOATHED that fish. she called it fish! how attached can u rlly be against smth u havent named. petunia pawned it off on her! she made Flushing jokes on the regular?? rly… was doing her a favor
Remus Lupin: please for the love of god tell me u didn’t tell her that
James Potter: which part
Remus Lupin: all of it. Any of it.
James Potter: well.
Remus Lupin: fuck
James Potter: so can i come over? 
Remus Lupin: …
James Potter: can i come in?
Remus Lupin: where are you?
James Potter: ur front steps
James Potter: i need Emotional Support, lupin
Remus Lupin: fine
fri.
James Potter to grlFIEND: still cant believe you tackled me to the ground this afternoon??? I should report u??
Lily Evans: I should report you??? trespassing? it’s how I’d treat any common burglar!
James Potter: 1. u know I’d be an Excellent burglar. don’t be harsh.
James Potter: 2. its not trespassing when i pay ½ rent
Lily Evans: Technically yes, but morally??? NOT ur flat
James Potter: you know how skeevy my teeth feel w/out my water flosser? which i still don’t have btw??
Lily Evans: I was so mad I threw ur attachments out, so
James Potter: Wow
James Potter: my rug burns are FINE, btw
Lily Evans: I had to buy a black dress, sew a veil, host a FUNERAL, write a EULOGY, send petunia a video of the whole thing, and ur whining about rug burns and a water flosser??? Lmao ok.
James Potter: lmao IM the dramatic one? OK
Lily Evans: Read 1:35:10 AM
James Potter: u actually have to, like, turn on the function for it to be a burn
Lily Evans: Read 1:36:14 AM
James Potter: …
Lily Evans: Read 1:36:25 AM
- - -
James Potter to Babe: u talking to me yet???
James Potter: it was an Accident
Sirius Black: Read 1:45:15 AM
Sirius Black: go to petes
- - -
James Potter: to pumpkin eater: PETE. My dude.
Peter Pettigrew: no.
James Potter: listen. black + lupin have fallen into dishonor
Peter Pettigrew: they haven’t
James Potter: they HAVE in collusion w/ one another and on their own, betrayed and disowned me. whts Dishonor if not that??
Peter Pettigrew: sirius told me u were wanking on his velvet sofa
James Potter: SCULLEY
Peter Pettigrew: i get it, but u know how he feels about that. second only to his motorbike.
James Potter: …
Peter Pettigrew: and u, ofc.
James Potter: he and remus both think x-files is shit
Peter Pettigrew: fuckers
James Potter: so can i come over?
Peter Pettigrew: go HOME, prongs. to ur girlfriend.
James Potter: p sure she dumped me???
Peter Pettigrew: 1. she LOVES ur fucking face. she nearly snogged it off in FRONT OF ME just last week?? shes just as miserable as u are.
Peter Pettigrew: 2. I live w/ my mum
Peter Pettigrew: 3. U rlly have a wanking problem.
Peter Pettigrew: 4. My mum has never seen a penis and I wont let the first one she sees be URS
James Potter: idk how to tell u this, pete, but shes a MUM, so…shes had kids…
James Potter: we can smoke
Peter Pettigrew: come in thru the back
 - - -
 James Potter to sailor moony: fuck
Remus Lupin: …you know my name isn’t actually ‘fuck’ … right? 
James Potter: Remus. Fuck.
Remus Lupin: isn’t pete watching you?
James Potter: he passed out.
Remus Lupin: dammit. where are you now??
James Potter: in a tree. like…u want to do a thought experiment with me?
Remus Lupin: …
James Potter: sorry, shldnt have phrased that as a question. Emotional Support.
Remus Lupin: you aren’t allowed to use that anymore.
James Potter: k, so like, if a person, however well-intentioned, right? like if they did something that hurt someone else. even if they didn’t Mean to. like maybe it’d be decent of them to say sorry??
Remus Lupin: you think???
James Potter: yea
James Potter: i mean…im Not saying that person shld. cos shes still bang out of order w/ the toothbrush. + the biscuits. + poisoning u and my mum against me.
James Potter: *their mate and their mum against them
Remus Lupin: you were saying…about the thought experiment?
James Potter: oh, like, well that person might owe the other person an apology
James Potter: *might. maybe. like 5% maybe
Remus Lupin: i would agree, but more like 95%
James Potter: just smth to Think about. Ya know??
James Potter: OK, heres the thing. its not hypothetical. talking abt evans ofc. cos like, i laughed, right? at her. while shes…crying. But!!! i smiled because it is kind of fucking funny??? shes overreacting + SOBBING. but, like, also cos shes so Cute and she did that elbow thing she always does when shes mad?? cannot convey how cute she was!! its so funny? that was, like, sure, the Wrong thing to do, because it just set her off More, and. ANYWAY, I could kind of…maybe…see how she would be upset by my laughing. or think I was laughing at her pain when really it was her anger. which doesn’t Sound like a good distinction, but it is a Solid distinction. ANYWAY, like, u know I have No Poker face, right?
Remus Lupin: you do wear your heart on you sleeve 
James Potter: we both know ive a LONG history of taking off my shirt
Remus Lupin: really? you, james fleamont potter, have a history of overreacting and making poor decisions and have impulse control problems? i had no. fucking. idea. completely shocked.
James Potter: imma ignore that u used my middle name + the bit abt the impulse control
Remus Lupin: apologize to her??
Remus Lupin: actually…get your thoughts together a little bit more than this, maybe? then apologize
James Potter: gotta figure how to get down from this tree first
James Potter: thx for the talk lupin
Remus Lupin: night, prongs
sat. 
James Potter to Maybe Lovely Lily: can I come home yet???
Lily Evans: lmao
Lily Evans: when u get ur shite together, yeah?
James Potter: u have all of my shite at OUR flat???
Lily Evans: delivered it to remus
 - - -
 James Potter to lupin, fuck: u have my stuff????
Remus Lupin: this pile of shite in my living room? yes.
Remus Lupin: come collect immediately pls.
James Potter: shove it in the spare closet
Remus Lupin: spare closet is full of pete’s contraband he doesn’t want his mum to see.
James Potter: right. well, go through and take what you want as payment.
Remus Lupin: already did. btw why do you have a sumo suit?
James Potter: she brought over the sumo suit???
Remus Lupin: yes.
James Potter: FUCKING WOW
James Potter: btw…how did she look? what all did she say? (not that I care!!!) but is she despondent w/out? dark circles? facial blemishes b/c she’s been too distracted to adhere to her rigorous skincare regime? did she even have the energy to contour??
Remus Lupin: she looked ok .
James Potter: whts that mean
Remus Lupin: i mean she looked fine.
James Potter: no tear tracks?
Remus Lupin: no.
James Potter: damn
Remus Lupin: she didn’t look great though? honestly, prongs, i think she’s just waiting for you to apologize.
James Potter: not a chance????
Remus Lupin: dammit. you were almost there last night
James Potter: ????
Remus Lupin: the thought experiment?
James Potter: i got high with pete last night
Remus Lupin: should’ve known.
James Potter: and I might have, except she gave back the sumo suit which is an act of war????
Remus Lupin: james…do not blow this…more out of proportion. ok?
James Potter: id never
Remus Lupin: BLOCKED
- - -
James Potter to #1 MUM: can i at least have the biscuit recipe???
Euphemia Potter: sent
- - -
James Potter to DEFO NOT LOVELY LILY: the sumo suit??? really???? u know how to cut deep, evans
James Potter: i thought this was going to blow over quickly but apparently no???
James Potter: PS I hope u like The Pic I posted on Instagram (dnt pretend like u arnt stalking me)
Lily Evans: u wldnt
James Potter: …already did
Lily Evans: btw I had to throw ur fave Tupperware away. contaminated w/ dead fish germs.
Lily Evans: like, I almost kept it and dint tell you, but my Conscience (a lil voice that tells u right from wrong) smote me, so….
James Potter: W O W. you kept a dead body in my fave Tupperware???? the one that keeps my soup warm???
Lily Evans: Read 11:13:09 PM
 - - -
 James Potter to Pete McGeet: listen: Chickity China the Chinese chicken
James Potter: and u…have a drumstick and your brain stops tickin’
James Potter: or smth
James Potter: anyway…wanna go to KFC???
Peter Pettigrew: what in the ever loving hell, prongs
James Potter: i think im cracking up
James Potter: defo pissed.
Peter Pettigrew: its sad. And a little bit pathetic.
James Potter: pathetic enough to stay at urs again tonight??? U know abt the others. And Mom wont let me on account of the principle.
Peter Pettigrew: if u bring KFC, yes
James Potter: me + the colonel are in a taxi now…
sun.
James Potter to Rude Remus: MATE
James Potter: got a burner phone
James Potter: PS imma pretend u ddnt block me
James Potter: anyway coming to go through my stuff, ok?
James Potter: Promise ill avoid ur sofa
Remus Lupin: sure thing.
- - -
James Potter to Lovely Lily: babe
James Potter: see u typing. u can pull that Read shit or whatever, but, like, I was sorting thru my stuff @ remus’s??? + I shldve done it yesterday….
James Potter: (dont tell him was here PLS bc hes pissed at me abt smth stupid)
James Potter: ANYWAY underneath the sumo suit – nice diversion btw, that super pissed me off – was a pack of brand new flosser attachments. + my flosser. u even rinsed it???
James Potter: like, Thanks
James Potter: coming home bc u obviously dnt Hate Me Eternally like u said before Lily Evans: i never said that! v frustrated w/ u but i don’t Hate u.
Lily Evans: listen. I know uve wanked (and cried??? oh yes. Pete told me.) urself out of all your friends’ good graces, so
Lily Evans: u can come back to the flat
Lily Evans: its, like, on a conditional basis
Lily Evans: we aren’t shagging
Lily Evans: u live on the couch
James Potter: we have a guest room???
Lily Evans: couch or bust
Lily Evans: you can use the guest bath tho
Lily Evans: and the kitchen…if you cook enough for me, too James Potter: cool
Lily Evans: cool
- - -
James Potter to M8S B4 D8S: fuck yessssssssssss
James Potter: have won!
James Potter: maybe technically it started as my fault? like 15%
James Potter: shes all but apologized!
James Potter: not formally ofc, but i know what she meant
James Potter: knew if I held out long enough, shed come around
James Potter: lupin…have been living in ur car btw….i owe u for crisps detailing
Remus Lupin: ew. Happy for u prongs. Gtfo of my car.
Peter Pettigrew: go home n wait for her to apologize
Sirius Black: wait before u apologize tho 2
James Potter: obvs (+ sorry abt ur velvet sofa Babe. ill pay to get it cleaned)
Remus Lupin: literally going to murder u all
mon.
 James Potter to #1 MUM: I know ur asleep, but I made u middle of the night biscuits.
James Potter: they r UTTER shit but I did Try
James Potter: thing is…u might have been a little (tiny bit!!) right about some of the things you said. Maybe. 
James Potter: anyway, am Home and will probably apologize to lily…soon
James Potter: and i love u and sorry i was so pissy abt no bacon
  - - -
James Potter to Lovely Lily: evans
Lily Evans: potter.
Lily Evans: how did u sleep?
James Potter: ok. u?
Lily Evans: meh
James Potter: i know id mentally said i wldnt do this for another day, on Principle, but Mum guilted me into it even tho she is still sleeping. Except she has a Point. So heres the thing ….
James Potter: and also moony said…
James Potter: i kind of, like,
James Potter: its like this, lil…
James Potter: well
Lily Evans: jfc babe don’t strain yourself, yea?
James Potter: u know what im saying tho 
Lily Evans: i do
Lily Evans: and same. (ish.))))
Lily Evans: it’s like this, james. i….
Lily Evans: fuck
Lily Evans: we rlly have to get better @ this.
Lily Evans: I KNOW it was an accident. and also, like, I sort of apparently overloaded the aquarium power cord in the first place w my hair dryer??? so…yeah
James Potter: fuck
Lily Evans: yeah….and I shouldn’t have, like, tackled u
James Potter: it wldve been hot if not for the rug burns
James Potter: and also i was insensitive w/ the laughing thing
Lily Evans: wait!! We hve to STOP
Lily Evans: can u not apologize yet. not fully to the point where I want to bone u??
James Potter: ….was kind of on a roll here tho
Lily Evans: yeah but we have to stop James Potter: y???
Lily Evans: the longer we fight..the better the make-up sex is going to be, yea? science
James Potter: tru…but id argue good make-up sex now is better than Great, theoretical make-up sex
Lily Evans: that WLD be true, but i, like, ordered something online… James Potter: something. or. like. Something.
Lily Evans: the Something u had bookmarked in ur private amazon wishlist hoping I’d find it
James Potter: stalker
James Potter: i love u….but i still think we should make up properly???? 
Lily Evans: no!!!! it’ll be here on Friday.
James Potter: i got u a new fish & everything!! named him eddie.
Lily Evans: nice!! but u know i hate fish. sold the aquarium to pay for the Something.
James Potter: well. Fuck.
Lily Evans: love you too
487 notes · View notes
chikotos · 7 years
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speaking of That my mom is finally recognizing that when I say “i dont feel good” it doesnt mean i have a cold or sth its that Uh, im probably experiencing suicidal thoughts and cant express it well (or at least smth along those lines) and my house has been dirty cuz i havent cleaned in a while or i cant keep it clean and she n my sister cleaned an area and i repeatedly told her not to bc shes always using my sister to do things im not adequate enough to do on time and its rlly not fair to her even if she doesnt realize it cuz like shes only 12 & we dont ever even talk so she shouldnt have to take care of someone 5 years older than her.. and i was gonna clean but I basically slept all day so i could just clean alone at night when I feel safe to walk around the house . i wasnt even tired idk why i slept but now im eerily awake and maybe will be umless i force myself to sleep
its so lonely here and thats only hit me like this year cuz all the time before I would go through periods of hanging out after school maybe.. twice a year? and only hanging out with one person whod have many friends but theyd b my only friend which is a problem i tend to have. but it jst got to the point where im realizing, i think cuz i was in my schools drama program n exposed to lots of friendships, that im jst like ,really fucking lonely. Which is unfortunate because ive always been such an internal person at home and have been able to work creatively but thats all like leaving me? art doesnt make me happy anymore because i dislike my art so much and havent had a platform to share it in so long and i guess I thrive on other ppls opinions of it? and I definitely cant write anymore. I havent been able to zone in on an interest in MONTHS and thats left me creatively drained, a lot. 
I think im starting to rlly, RLLY redirect my complete attention from interests to ppl (which always ends well am i right lads) and it isnt fair to ppl who like, have others and need space and time etc or Uh, dont even know me. but its like a switch like , I can either be creative or i can feel loved and Boy Howdy, do i need both,
its just weird cuz im the only one in my family thats emoitonal like this and I think thats why i feel so isolated. like im not exxagerating when I say my dad has 0 friends tht arent family. my mom has work friends she will hang out with maybe 4 times a year not for work, but shes always complaining abt social situations which I can understand. maybe my siblings r like that too but my sisters young n focuses on minecraft n stuff n hangs out w friends more than me n we barely know each other so its not like id know, maybe my half brother is but whens the last time hes wanted to talk to me right. like i cry all the time and all it does is make my dad angry at memfor being incompetent and make my mom think its her fault and my sister confused and jst takes up everyones time
and its jst all v strange. like i was kinda raised 2 not have friends, inadvertantly i guess. i can remember my mom trying to make me feel better about something along the lines of u can b okay w/out friends if u have family but she jst told me friends dont matter and im never gonna talk to ppl i meet at my age as an adult, so it stuck w/ me and i started to make moral judgements on ppl on small things we could talk out like say, they use homophobic language sometimes but im sure theyd respect me enough to stop, but id make those judgements before we could befriend each other n take a chance, kinda to protect myself from attachments? but later in life ive found ppl who dont do stuff like that, and thats when i focus in on them im an unfair way to them and they r the only person/group of ppl in my life, etc etc and idk how to stop because im so scared of hanging out w/ most ppl alone i guess? but ill still be here, thinking about like example (namedrop bc he doesnt have me tumblr anyways) my friend jacob tht never hung out w/ me outside of school but i fuccin loved that kid n he just stopped talking to me over the summer n ignored my text i send first day of summer and now we see each other and talk briefly but its like he wont let us be friends anymore and smth like this always happens and its So
and tbh how can i expect it to not happen when i limit myself so much n they will have plenty of other close close friends when i dont? and i think ive gotten better but idk anymore. 
and uh, unrelated. I think my dog ive had for 12 years may have to end up being put down this year. hes got cataracts in both eyes and skin diseases and back problems and teeth problems (hes inbred) and hes losing his hearing too and for the past two weeks hes been peeing everywhere and we can let him out but he cant climb stairs anymore n he has to walk them to get to our yard and im the only one w/ the patience to pick him up (hes only 8 pounds) n put him in the yard bc my parents will jst scream at him n my sister doesnt like dogs and hes got seperation issues w me and whines when he cant be in my room which is the farthest from the door out n stuff. and its like rlly stressful my mom will scream at him in front of my sister n brother n me and the other day she said my dad grabbed him by the neck and threw him out on the concrete cuz he peed inside and hes so tiny that thats just gonna make everyting worse and its notmlike i can stop them bc why would anyone listen to me and hed prob b fine for s few more years if he lived in a patient house with ppl who would take him to the vet but theyre prob gonna put him down early snd its gonna b so weird w/out him
when i showered earlier i took s razor with me w/ the intent to cut my thighs, and i did a little, but i never ever draw blood wnd its strange. why am i given these urges when im so fucking terrified of blood. itll still leave marks n stuff but it makes me feel weak ? n ill bruise myself up instead but its never the same. and im such an advocate for help w self harm but i cant for myself. its like i subconsciously want 2 get caught ? idk. i did throw my razor away though and the others i have r rusty and im not THAT much of a dumbass so i dont have options to self harm anymore unless i get new ones. lifehack
and uh lol, having no schedule n it being summer my eating habits r SHIT. it always hurts to eat p much, its at different times n most of the time i just snck only or i dont eat for hours n see black spots n stuff. and when i dont eat its not a body image thing (im nt rlly happy w my nody but its not sth not eating will help with) its cuz i dknt wanna go upstairs for food where my dad is n the snacks r downstairs so its easier, or cuz i forget or cuz i like, want to punish myself? but im too lazy to self harm. its weird
n since ive stopped id’ing as ace officially my internalized lesbophobia has gotten so much worse . im so repressed and lost ans sad, nothinng rly makes sense? I either fall in love w/ anyone who flirts with me or i focus on someone who ill never fucking talk to or see again and imagine countless scenarios n set myself up to b sad. i seek validation from ppl on it but nothhing comes out right or i just cant say it, because other than when i make myself the butt of gay jokes i just cant sven get the words out of my throat that im gay cuz im jst so ashamed and disgusted with myself. ive been looking at pictures of guys lately cuz ive been trying to force myself to like them. back when i thought i was pan it always felt safer bc i could always just love a cis guy or whatever and everything would b okay for my family ykno. and its such a shameful thing for me bc my irl friends who im out to, most see me as v confident abt it at least a little bc im loud abt it u kno, and make all sorts of jokes, and i jst know so many would b surprised or like sad abt that
i want to stop liking girls so much. like holy shit. i have so many straight girl friends and i hate it when they flirt with me because lik, none r my type so i feel nothing but then i feel like i shiuld then feel like No i shouldnt then feel like i shouldnt even be around them bc im a gross disgusting creepo dyke predator. n they always use the excuse of me having a gf so its fine id never hit on them well like, now im single so i have to be DOUBLE careful not to b affectionate w them as im w all my friends and itsssssssssssssmjshfjhdjfhsjdhjshdjshdjhsjdhsjhdjshdk
and i like, think abt this girl alot n yea its romantic even thomwe never fucking talked n rlly i do that w lots of girls and its making me lose out on friendships bc i wanna b their friends somehow bc i think theyre very cool n stuff but i cant stop hodling on to stupid daydreams n idealizations i get to distract me when im sad n its jst stupid like i know its dumb but guess whos boutta keeeeeeppppp doin it??!!!!! boy!!!
and i try so damn hard to talk feeling out, n talk abt who im attracted to n stuff w ppl, n i try so hard to gush but i cant cuz smth comes outta my mouth and then i cant speak past that and no one ends up rlly knowing how i feel, bc ANY time i talk abt anytingngay related abt me its what happens. and i listen to others talking abt tht stuff and i jsut get so god damn JEALOUS bc idk how to express myself 
all these inadequacies n shit is making it rlly hard to see how,im gonna b on my own n its always been like this. at TWELVE YEARS OLD i came to fhe fucking conclusion that i was just gonna kill myself when i turned 18 so i didnt have to deal with all this and i was OKAY WITH IT and i just went through life knowing that and hiding it and so rarely questioning my inevitable suicide as a childc so instead of dealing with all that n my problems n getting better i let myself get worse cuz uh, fuck it right
idk its all just occured to me how im not a fully functioning human being, in seberal if not all aspects of my life, its weird. now that I actively want to live and realize i uh Kinda have to simce ill b the legal guardian of my brother its all very scary
sorr i was all over the place and all the typos i didnt mean anyof them n im not crytyping like, i cried a bit but i jst hate typing kn thsi shitty tablet keyboard, n dont wanna spellcheck. if u read through comgratulations also please dont message me abt like the self harm junk n my dog n stuff like, whatever ur abt to say. I Know my guy 
time to go uhhhhhhhhhhh daydream about impossible gay shit with guilt in the back of my mind
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epcain · 7 years
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* ☾˙ ˖ HEY hi hello!!! i’m jin ( s/her, nineteen, gmt+9 ) and i’m super duper excited for this rp !! it’s my first rp in a while and my first hp rp ever haha :”) and i don’t really know much abt hp so pls forgive my ignorant self im srry!!!! anyway here’s my bby cain, and here are his profile and bio ! there’s more stuff under the cut so if you wanna plot like this ( bc i wanna write with Everyone ) and i’ll come @ u!!
xu minghao, but he usually goes by cain ( pronounced cane / kayn ) so call him that unless u hella close to him
his mom died in childbirth so he was left an orphan since his dad Vanished even before he was born
retained his surname from his biological parents!
eighteen, but in sixth year bc he missed a year of school
halfblood, but doesn’t rly care lbr like how he didn’t really care what house he got sorted into but obv he was made for gryffindor ,,
grew up in an orphanage in china where he was born
when he was like five he got adopted into this super wealthy korean pureblood family who lived in the uk ?? and so he moved halfway across the world for them
he has like some elder siblings and some younger ones from his adoptive family so .. u should def hmu if anything :-)
speaks english , chinese and korean, effectively trilingual
even since he was in the orphanage, he’d been causing trouble since day 1 tbh and it didn’t stop even after he got adopted
is rly mischievous, did a lot of shit in school and accidentally used his magic a lot
ofc his parents weren’t rly .. pleased about it and he got disciplined A Lot and yet he never learned??
when he got into hogwarts it didn’t get better at all tbh but to be honest .. cain was really happy when he saw how proud his parents were
i mean he’s always been a lil insecure about it bc like ? adopted halfblood in a pureblood family and still constantly disappointing them ? altho he would never ever mention it but still
played a lot of harmless pranks in school, but never really harmed anyone until he like Actually Did by accident
also he promised that he would be good and he stuck to that until one day he found a student being bullied ?? and he immediately sprung into action bc .. he’s Cain it’s in his nature
so um yea he got kinda suspended for a year or smth like he took a break from hogwarts for an entire year
anyway apparently now he’s a whole changed person but Um .. he’s still really playful and adventurous and loves loves loves doing stupid shit
like if u dared him to do smth chances are he’d probably do it
PERSONA ! 
excited 99% of the time, his energy is probably endless. u gotta work to keep up w him
almost always a human puppy ??
while he seems playful and hyper all the time underneath all that sweetness he’s actually really tough at heart
also kinda impatient and hotheaded, he’s usually really sweet but when he’s mad u wouldn’t wanna ?? get that
also he’s deadly loyal to those he loves, cross them and u’ll find yourself dead within two seconds
10/10 would stand up for what he thinks is right, would even get into a fight for it ok, literally just wants justice for everyone
is also very passionate about the things he does!! whatever he does he does it to the best of his ability
extremely stubborn and persistent, especially if he sets his mind to do smth and he’ll definitely complete it even if he has to go an extra mile and step out of his comfort zone
very outspoken and bold!! if there was a debate team he would definitely be on it and could honestly argue for ten hours straight
which also leads to him being kinda blunt sometimes … and kinda tactless 
pretty confident and self-assured !!! is just out here to have a good time tbh
like i said earlier altho he seems like he only sticks around for the lighthearted stuff he actually will also stick around for the serious stuff and will comfort you and assure you if you’re down
is very analytical and observant. think he’s dumb ? think again
sensitive and perceptive too, if you’ve had a bad day or have something that’s bothering you chances are cain is the first one to notice
will give you all the love in his hearT!!! 
sometimes he gets into those Moments where he thinks about what a disappointment he is .. h Ah but he knows his parents love him so its ok
is kinda clumsy and really prone to injuries and accidents, especially since he does so many stupid things .. he prolly visits the infirmary so often that he’s probably friends w the staff there
i mean he’s a genuinely really nice and caring person but you really wouldn’t wanna mess w/ him OR the people he cares for bc he will show No Mercy
parties ? a good time ? cain is ur answer 
kind of a romantic at heart ???? but for now he does one night stands a lot, kinda really a f*ckboy come to think of it
is really extra too ?? lmao
also very athletic!!!! ofc with those long noodly legs of his..
super !! duper !!! nice !!!!! but not a pushover never a pushover 
just has a lot of love for everyone and is a softie but also not!!! just love my energetic cute son ok ok any questions pls ask!!!
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ayyponine · 7 years
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