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b0bthebuilder35 · 8 months

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yea-baiyi · 1 year

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ok but like imagine being hua cheng. and when you were a teenager you were trapped in a cave with your god when he got hit with sex pollen and you already felt ugly and unlovable but he stabbed himself through the gut rather than touch you and you saw him shirtless and horrifyingly that’s how you found out you were gay

and then you meet him again centuries later when you’ve grown up and become comfortable in your own skin, and you think you might be in love with him except a part of you still feels terrified that he’ll look at you and find you hideous again. but you want to trust him so you show him your real face. and. turns out he finds your adult self so hot that you make him horny for the first time in his life and he keeps doing and saying absolutely deranged things because he does not know how to cope. he panics and tries to give you, a ghost, mouth-to-mouth resuscitation and while you’re lying there trying not to freak out he is beside you acting out his one man humiliation-style comedy show because he has never wanted to kiss someone before let alone fuck. he agrees to get locked in a coffin together because he never even considered the possibility that he might pop a boner except he does pop a boner and now you are stuck under him while he squirms and you are trying very hard not to think about your own boner

i don’t know how to end this post i just think that’s so funny. and they live happily ever after and have lots of gay sex. hua cheng keeps winning. slay king

#tgcf #hua cheng #hualian #xie lian #aroace mxtx analysis #tgcf meta #meta stuff #my hyperfixation demon #grey ace xie lian #does this count as meta #i’m sorry i’m still on this train #funnies #i wrote this post last night and i still don’t know how to end it but god. it’s just so funny #hua cheng deserves to get railed after all that. king #i swear to god this all started as me trying to articulate hua cheng’s devotion and instead i just keep running into #how hua cheng is just here vibing and then xie lian is all skdhgshdkdhb and he’s just like. well this might as well happen i guess

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atopvisenyashill · 3 months

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Thoughts on the Alysanne is Maegor's daughter AU? I feel like it has some interesting potential, and it vastly recontextualizes different parts of Jaehaehae (I do not like him sjsjsjs) and Alysanne's relationship (such as Jaehaehae's treatment of their daughters) but I wanna hear what you think about it!

I’ve touched on this a bit before but since you actually want to hear my thoughts, allow me to present to you my Jaehaerys Is The Goddamn Worst, And Alysanne Annoys Me Too: An Essay lmao but my answer is basically “yeah all of what you just said.”

I think it makes Alysanne much more palatable (to me) as a character because as she stands, she just fixates on forcing her daughters through these fucked up marriages at too young an age bc it traumatized her to be married and pregnant at 15 too but she’d never admit that being a willing participant in her own kidnapping by her brother-husband was the single worst thing that ever happened to her, and because Alysanne doesn’t want to admit it (and Jaehaerys would never see it as wrong or a mistake) F&B really shies away from delving into the fact that Alysanne is as deranged of a mother as Cersei is. So as she stands, she’s very flat to me because she’s presented very flatly and inconsistently. She’s so in love with Jaehaerys, she’s maritally raped by Jaehaerys, she’s a loving and doting mother, she forces her daughters into marriages when they’re the same too young age she was, she accuses her teenage girls of being scheming whores then gets angry when her husband accuses their teenage girls of being scheming whores, and worst of all we are just told “Maegelle tells them to make up so they do” so we don’t know why Alysanne gets over all of this. What is the point of riding a dragon when you never use that dragon to protect your daughters from unwanted teen marriages? We’re just not given a good enough justification for why her behavior is so weird and frustrating towards her daughters.

Make her Maegor’s daughter though…most of her behavior as an adult makes more sense. Like a worse version of Rhaenyra’s childhood almost - a father desperate for a son, but lowkey obsessed with his daughter, who makes all his hang ups about his parents the problems of every woman around him, except Maegor is out here blood sacrificing and torturing and starting wars and forcing babies on wives he discards quickly and brutally. Then here comes Jaehaerys on a white horse green dragon to save her from the horror her life has become, and he loves her so much he runs away with her even though Alyssa says they shouldn’t marry because people won’t like it. And they have beautiful children, and a beautiful marriage, and build a beautiful kingdom.

Then her pregnancies start getting dangerous. Gaemon, then Valerion, die. Alysanne thinks of the shriveled up mutants she called brothers, if Maegor’s taint has passed to her. Her perfect husband ignores her no, and forces Gael on her. Alysanne remembers that he said nothing to Rogar when Alyssa died, merely wept. Then her daughters start to die. Daella, Alyssa, Viserra, all within a few years. Then Jaehaerys makes Saera watch as he murders her boyfriend, calls her a whore, and says Alysanne cannot follow Saera to Lys. Alysanne thinks of Maegor torturing the Harroways over Alys’ presumed infidelity. Jaehaerys says he’s sorry, and her daughter badgers her into forgiving him, and she remembers how she helped Jaehaerys badger Alyssa into forgiving Rogar. Not two years later, Jaehaerys passes over Rhaenys. Alysanne thinks of how she was never enough for her father, how she felt so superior to Rhaena banished to Dragonstone and resented by Aerea, yet there she is dragging Gael away from court because she can’t stand to be with Jaehaerys. How her father was surrounded by dead women and dead babies and how Jaehaerys is surrounded by his own dead daughters, but surely she did the right thing, surely Maegor was worse, surely the realm is better off? Is he right to pass over Rhaenys? Is she enabling a man just as monstrous as her father? She will never decide, because Maegelle will guilt her about keeping Gael isolated at Dragonstone, and Alysanne will do as she’s told, just like Rhaena, and Alyssa, and Jeyne, Elinor, Ceryse, Alys, and Tyanna, just like every one of her daughters.

I do get why Alysanne is Alyssa & Aenys’ and not Maegor’s. The weird Targ babies, the line not descending from Visenya, Jaehaerys and Alysanne being held up as the perfect Targaryen couple specifically because they are brother and sister and dragon riders. I do even think canon Alysanne is likely traumatized by her time as a hostage on Dragonstone, and the ensuing war, and the trauma bond that caused with Jaehaerys, and it makes her idolize Jaehaerys, and then he isolates her at Dragonstone so he can swiftly and safely marry, groom, and knock her up. It’s not like,,,, a fun time, and it’s enough to make anyone crazy and weird about their daughters, but I think having her father be Maegor makes Alysanne herself much deeper because it gives her, as the most beloved Targaryen queen, a blood tie to the most hated Targaryen king, and a marriage to the most beloved Targaryen king. It fits better with a lot of the themes of the main series (again, imo) - forcing the spotlight on the outsiders to see how the affect the story from behind the scenes. The fall of Aegon’s sons, and The Long Reign, not told from the PoV or to serve the PoV of any of the kings or princes, but of the queen that tied them all together.

#anti jaehaerys i targaryen #f&b critical #fire and blood critical #asks #thesadboy #like he kind of does this with aenys & maegor by focusing on alyssa and rhaena and the wives and visenya.#but the Moment jaehaerys enters the scene he completely dominates it. the same way daemon and aemond do actually.#but this is not. it should not!! be their story. that’s not how the main series is told anyway!!#if f&b isn’t told by a dornish maester than it should have been written by a septa!!!#nuns wrote books!!!!!#rich noblewomen wrote novels and poetry!!!!!!!#GEORGE DO YOU READ WOMEN. I AM NO LONGER ASKING POLITELY.#i went to look for her mother and apparently this was just a mistake elio made and i’m even more depressed. i can’t believe i’m saying this #but elio damn your mind.#i bet he saw that and went ‘wait which one is her fucjing mother’ and george was like what in the goddamn hell are you talking about.#idk who would be her mother in this au. if we want to keep her within 3 ish years of jaehaerys it Has to be alys or ceryse. ceryse hightowe #is the hilarious and obvious choice. but don’t count out alys harroway second wife here either.#then there’s rhaena as her mother which with the canon timeline makes him 12 years older and isn’t THAT horrible let’s stop here actually.

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curi0uscreature · 7 months

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* Vampire Helmut mayhaps? A little bit of Fullbat anyone??

#fulfilling my want of more nonhuman Helmut AUs. Bob only deserves the best #psychonauts 2 #psychonauts #psychonauts au #Count Fullbat AU #< If I ever keep this. slightly doubting #helmut fullbear #bob zanotto #viking vines #don’t know what to tag the joke as in case but! see it as you wish #curi0us artworks

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spadesmain · 8 months

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Silly doodle dabbles of my favorite skeleton before another art :0

#next time I might or might not draw papyrus again #mehhh don’t count on it I’m bad at keeping my word XD #papyrus #the great papyrus #papyrus the skeleton #papyrus undertale #undertale papyrus #papyrus ut #ut papyrus #flowey the flower [ kinda? ]#undertale #utdr #spades art

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imthursdaysyme · 10 months

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Sleepover shenanigans

#drawing #steve harrington #stranger things #robin buckley #stobin #they were in her room arguing like old married couple #listen steve just doesn’t understand how she can’t do it bc he thinks she can do anything #he said what tf do you mean you don’t have abs and rob was like bestie I don’t work out they aren’t strong I’m a limo noodle #and he was like well girl get on that I don’t want you to die bc you didn’t keep your body healthy istg your worse than Henderson #and she was like HEY I do plenty of things such as ride my bike and he said ok then why are your thighs the size of my forearm #and he keeps yelling at her to use her core and she’s screaming at him that she’s trying #and he’s holding her leg #but we’ll rob flails and her heel whacked him in the eye so he feel back #hit the wall thought he was dead #dropped rob to the ground and shes cursing like an d man that had to get up from his chair #and she’s like why’d you drop me and he doesn’t respond so she looks over #and my man is out for the count with another black eye #she thinks she killed him and worries that after years of demogorgons and Russians the thing that kills Steve Harrington is #Robs sharp ass heel #she pushes him under the bed and covers him with blankets and then goes to sleep #except he wakes up at like 2am and she screams worse than when she saw a ud creature for the 1st time and whacks him back down and BAM #he is out again and now Robin is freaking out more bc omg she killed her platonic soulmate and he came back to life only for her to kill him #AGAIN #she wonders if she can be tried for double manslaughter on one man but how would they know? then rob realized she can’t testify bc #she’ll tell everything if she gets up on the stand and she won’t just be sentenced for life she’ll be sentence for TWO lives #but then she’s like omg I deserve two life sentences to honor Steve even though he wouldn’t be in jail she just assumes he goes with her #even her own prison sentence for his murder #the next time Steve wakes up he inches out and flips on her to tame her flailing limbs and she starts crying saying #I killed you twice but my love for you is so strong it brought you back a third time and steve is like you knocked me out shithead you didnt #murder me Jesus Christ and she’s like how do you k ow and he’s like omg how do I know

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padawansuggest · 10 months

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I’m writing a fic where Obi-Wan gets bit by a feral cat (they have never seen a cat in Star Wars they think it’s just a really fucked up tooka) and instead of getting rabies shots, like a normal person, he’s on campaign with the 212th, and ends up mutantly growing cat ears and a tail. But wait, there’s more. Since he’s already got fangies and purrs super hard and has glow in the dark eyes, the 212th sorta just accepts it. He’s not much different than normal. Likes to crash in their cuddle puddles more, plays with feathers sometimes, accidentally dragged Dooku and Ventress back to the light side through purring hard and meowing at them till they followed him home, normal Kenobi stuff. So the clones are like ‘yeah, this is his new normal’ and accept it.

But then. One day, he’s laying on Cody’s chest and tummy, and maybe biting him a little, and suddenly he’s nursing on Cody’s chest…!!?! Okay??? So Cody, not wanting to get a rash, takes off his backs so his general can nurse in peace, like ‘yeah this isn’t normal or humanoid but at least he’s content and sleepy and DID YOU SEE THAT HE SLOW BLINKED AT ME WAXER IT WAS SO PRECIOUS- and he’s being a good boy yes he is yes he is he’s the goodest little orange boy in the whole world-!’ And so now that’s normal for them.

But then one day Cody is cleaning his blasters with The Boys (Rex and Fox and Wolffe are there this is sooooooo embarrassing he’s gonna kill someone) when one of them points out that his shirt is wet. Well, after some panicked (he was fine he just wanted the ground to open up and swallow him whole but getting sucked on was how we got into this mess in the first place so maaaaaaaybe no) checks with Kix and Helix (they are arguing and no one can figure out what about) it turns out he’s just a big milkie maker good lad so this is absolutely normal too.

Well, their precious No braincells orange cat General quickly realizes his normal nursing buddy is making special treats for him!!!! How kind!!! So obviously the others of Ghost company get hella jealous and start inducing lactation too so he’ll come cuddle up to them too. He will also take that.

At first the Jedi are like ‘wtf are they all doing’ till Bant frantically spreads the news that Kenobi gained four pounds and it’s not much but the numbers lately have been CONSISTENTLY down and she’s so excited she’s passing out lactation inducers like candy it’s so weird.

Anyways. Palpatine has a heart attack a month later (poor guy, someone shit on his headstone at the funeral, how sad) and now Obi-Wan lives in a big compound of happy Jedi and gets milkies whenever he wants. What a great ending. Have you seen his favorite toy spring??? He could have sworn he was playing with it in front of the refractory unit. He’ll go ask Alpha to help rescue it.

#star wars #obi wan kenobi #catboy obi wan #cat obi wan #clone wars #catboy #cringe is dead #male lactation #codywan #obiclone #212th attack battalion #212th shenanigans #who the fuck let me keep the 501st typo that long #y’all should know I don’t know numbers I can’t count and sometimes I forget phone numbers

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fireyartccoon · 29 days

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By the power of April Fools, I bring you this.

Princess Nine of Grimtopia and his trusty right hand knight, Sir Blue Screen of Death.

You can blame their existence on these two action figures I have

I stole the tiara from a local target 👍

#sonic prime #sonic prime season 3 #does this count as an AU?#No idea #tails nine #nine the fox #miles nine prower #alpha grim sonic #Sonic trooper #I didn’t feel like keeping the name so his name is now Blue screen of death.#BSOD for short #Nine is now a certified pretty princess #I don’t know where the hell im going to get knight armor for Sir BSOD #might have to make it myself #Same thing with the sword #Sadly he can’t even hold anything 😔

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fabuloustrash05 · 2 months

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The irony that Michelangelo has had the most love interests out of any of the Turtles (8 in total I believe) yet in the end, we all know who his real true love is:

✨ PIZZA ✨

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rapidhighway · 2 years

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a lil trickster fox that’s twice your size, nothing to worry about :)

#nogitsune #having soooo much fun with this brush akcneijiew #and so much fun drawing this guy its amazing #art #digital art #animal character design is HARD xdd #sis said my foxes look like wolves so I just gotta keep trying :’|#I just don’t want him to be orange he’s brown and dark red!!! >_<#does this still count as teen wolf fanart it’s barely there xdjdncidhice

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bleue-flora · 4 months

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All of these hot takes are really making me feel left out lol. So um hot take:

c!Dream is autistic and the consequential misunderstanding and miscommunication is a root of all the problems and conflicts.

(Note: I say this as someone who is autistic and after being diagnosed at the age of 20, discovered that at the heart of 90% of my conflicts, now and in the past, is a failure in communication from being misjudged and misunderstood.)

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ofliterarynature · 3 months

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tbr of doom update • January 2024

Read:

Call Down the Hawk

Mister Impossible

All the Hidden Paths

Portrait of a Thief DNF

Unhauling:

Red Rising

Golden Son

Portrait of a Thief

Truthwitch

#bec posts #book log #books #booklr #book photography #dreamer trilogy #call down the Hawk #Maggie stiefvater #all the hidden paths #portrait of a thief #I did also read Greywaren I just don’t own it lmao #so it’s not included in the count #all the hidden paths is on the fence for keeping tbh #I think I’ll like if more if I reread it though #anything being unhauled is up for grabs btw message me!#I promise I’m cheap #from instagram

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macbcth · 4 months

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my grandma won’t stop commenting on my SH scars and i kind of froze bc i didn’t realise my mum hadn’t prepared her or anything?? or talked abt my depression at all?? so my mom said they were cat scratches— just a blatant god awful lie In Front of me— and now my grandma won’t stop asking questions abt it like oh what cat! and when will they go away? and i think im going to have to sit my very Indian grandma down and explain depression and self harm to her in my broken hindi and i’m dreading it so bad

#i hate that i have to do this but im sick of her asking questions #and my mum is just going to keep lying bc ik she’s really ashamed of my SH scars #so i can’t count on my mum for support #im going to literally have to be so so brave yall im so scared #but you know what they say do it scared #hopefully she won’t make it a big deal #im just not going to talk to her if she does like lowkey i don’t need another judgemental adult in my life #aisha.txt #self harm cw

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dearreader · 3 months

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lock: broken

slur: spoke

wound: open

game: token

i didn’t know you were keeping count

#kelly babels #high infidelity #i don’t know why but seeing it laid out like this somehow made it click that her list was keeping count it a track list

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wren-kitchens · 21 days

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social anxiety can be so funny sometimes because i’ll be talking to someone and they’ll go offline for whatever reason and i’m always like ‘oh no did I say too much’ when I said probably one of the most average things i’ve ever said to that person

#me n my irls sharing Way too much and then i’ll go ‘omg that’s so cool’ and worry if i’m too forward #the irony is that I keep forgetting i’m having a conversation and accidentally leave the conversation for like half an hour and come back #way later for another unrelated reason and only then will I remember #i’m a huge hypocrite and I am aware of this #regardless #wren wrambles #social anxiety #does this count as a vent #I don’t think so cause i’m mostly just laughing at myself here HKFHD #this is queued btw #I do have a tag for that but a single q amongst all these tags would probably look accidental so I thought i’d mention it #q #see that looks like I misclicked #anyway

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falseroar · 6 months

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“Why are there so many books?”

-Things I shouldn’t whisper under my breath in horror considering I work in a library, but here we are with 9 freaking book trucks of stuff to be weeded and I am losing my mind a little.

#work vent #library #this is why you do regular weeding #instead of literally putting it off for years #only to dump it all on the one person in charge of withdrawing and taking care of all this #for the record this is just the latest count #there have been so many carts over this last year #I don’t know how there’s anything left at this point #but they keep finding more economics books from the 70s #SOMEHOW

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