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stxrvel · 3 months

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the cliff (1)

hi guys! this is the first azriel fic i post here. i mainly do marvel but i just couln't stop thinking about this so i decided to take it forward. i hope you guys like this! see u next time <;33

summary: you never thought that the road to your mate could bring so much suffering… pairing: azriel x f!reader words: +4k warnings: briefly descriptions of torture, bad words, descriptions of sorrow¿?, angst but a happy ending, i think. also, English is not my first language and i actually read acotar in another language, so sorry for any mistakes! and also!! i haven't read a court of silver flames, so probably the facts around cassian and nesta's bond and feyre's pregnancy aren't accurate, sorry for that!

part 2: the house

part 3: the court

part 4: the routine

You were sure that the decisions you had made shouldn't have led you to that place. With your limp legs dragging against the grass, the wet feel of the mud drying coldly on your skin with each gale, increasing the chills that ran through your body, not only because of the dread and fear you had for your life, but because of the scorching frost on the top of that cliff.

There was something magical about wishing upon a shooting star. You knew it, your parents were living proof that it worked. They had met just after your mother had wished upon a dying star. Mates. And they promised you it would be the same for you. You hoped it would be the same for you when, encouraged by your same parents, you wandered Prythian in search of meeting the other end of the bond that you knew connected you to someone beyond, in search of a connection greater than you could ever understand.

You firmly believed in that magic one night, in the midst of the lonely and almost desolate journey from end to end, when lying watching the night sky you saw it pass by. A helpless shooting star.

You made your wish with your heart in your hand, closing your eyes and whispering as if it were a prayer. Maybe it was. You didn't know if that was what had gone wrong.

All you knew was that, the next day, your journey was over.

You hadn't finished waking up when you found yourself being dragged across the ground of the Day Court, right at the border it shared with the Night Court, from the hands of Ilyrian soldiers who wouldn't listen to your shouted words. Or simply preferred to ignore them.

You weren't sure how much you had screamed at them, even as they took you in the most savage way possible and furrowed you through the wind, the cold gusts of the Nightmare Court piercing your skin. But it had to have been a good while, because the next time you were above ground your throat was so dry you could barely breathe.

You didn't know what was going on, not even when days later, after feeding yourself with only mush and water, you met the first person willing to tell you something and not turn his face away from you. It was a man, Ilyrian too, with gigantic black wings that covered almost all the light in the small room where you were held captive. His constant presence invoked darkness.

He never introduced himself. He would only ask “who sent you?”, waiting for a sane answer from you, one that you couldn't give because every time you tried to say something that was not remotely like what he wanted to hear, he would move two fingers of his left hand and two more soldiers would enter the room and grab you roughly by the arms, pulling you closer to a barrel with water that was in the corner of the room. That was the water you usually drank, and it was never as cold as when they entered the room.

Needless to say, after a couple of days, you couldn't even go near the water anymore.

It could've been a couple of days, weeks or months… you weren't sure anymore. Time had become an insignificant concept compared to your desire for freedom. You had explained countless times to the Ilyrian the reasons why they had found you wandering near the Court, but that wasn't enough. Not even when you told him that they could confirm it with your family in the Summer Court. No excuse was good enough, the Ilyrian seemed to simply want to find a culprit, whatever he had to do, whoever he had to point the finger at.

And then, one day, you thought you saw a glimmer of hope. Another lone shooting star, which you barely caught through the bars the room had for windows. The memory of your parents flooded your memory, a dark cloud settling over you and drowning out any sense of calm you were able to collect after the ilyrians left. Through tears and sobs you begged the star for a way out, hoping its magic was powerful enough to fight the savage soldiers.

The next day more ilyrians than usual appeared, but they did not enter the room. Not after the High Lord of the Night Court did so first.

And you thought the star had heard you.

“She didn't say anything?”

His dismissive, indifferent tone almost made you shudder on the icy floor, but you didn't let that take away your hope, kneeling in front of him with dried tears and dirt on your face. With your hands clasped in front of you, as if he were a deity personified, you begged him to listen to you, but you had to watch him send you a disinterested glance before he turned in the direction of the entrance.

“Take her away.”

You didn't know why you had expected the high lord to intercede on your behalf, knowing the stories that brimmed through the Courts in Prythian. Your parents had warned you. They encouraged you to pursue the bond on your chest, but begged you to go no further than Court Day if the bond demanded it. They made you promise to return, and that they would then seek a way to find your mate if he or she was beyond the Night Court. You should've heeded, of course you did. When you saw the cold, emotionless eyes of the high lord's face, you regretted every decision you had made.

Even though you knew it shouldn't have been that way, because you had never done anything wrong. You had never tried to harm someone. Maybe that made it harder. Wondering every night why. Why did you deserve to go through that? What evil was it that you were paying for?

There was something magical about wishing on a shooting star, but that magic wasn't guarded for you.

Azriel had been spending sleepless nights for weeks now, without explanation. Things were quiet in Velaris, even in the Court of Nightmares. But when he entered the darkness of his room at night, when he tried to close his eyes with his wings spread across the bed, a knot stirred in his chest. Tears would well up behind his eyes and a sadness would engulf him from head to toe. It was so overwhelming that there were few nights when Azriel could contain the feelings and despair of his shadows.

He tried not to let that deficiency interrupt his work, but it was difficult when his eyes would close at the table during breakfast, or in the middle of the room when Rhys talked about the weekly goals. Several times his friends would start asking questions, but it was easy for Azriel to say he had trouble sleeping because that was never an uncommon occurrence over the course of his long life.

It was once Rhys told him that he had told Madja about his problem and she had sent him some herbs that it all started to get weirder.

Yes, Azriel was able to fall asleep. But every night he had strange dreams. Dreams of a life that was not his own. Memories of someone else he didn't even know. Another woman's life, somewhere Azriel could barely remember when he woke up, with more people who must have been close to her, but not to him, who shared her day to day life, who celebrated together with her, who were happy. Azriel didn't wake up much better in the mornings than when he spent the whole night without sleep.

Now he not only had to deal with the heaviness of lack of sleep, but with the questions. He could never think they were random dreams because he heard the same laughter every time, the same voice, the same place. He felt the same tranquility before waking up.

Azriel believed Madja would be his source of answers then.

“Your mate is looking for you,” the old woman answered him, one sunny day in Velaris when he chased her through her tent hoping she would answer his one question. That stopped him abruptly on his feet, his body from the abdomen upward leaning forward a bit from the suddenness of the movement.

“Mate?”

Madja barely hissed in response, a sound of affirmation that would haunt Azriel for several days afterward.

“How is that possible?”

“What?”

Madja was turning her back to him, her small body hunched over as she inspected the medicinal plants she kept for sale. Azriel watched them along with her, his mind moving through the threads of thoughts, between every memory of his dreams and every memory…of her.

“How can she do that?”

Azriel heard Madja sigh and the sound of metal followed as she dropped the gray watering can she had kept for years into place. Azriel could still remember the first time it had been seen, shiny and pompous in the Velaris sunlight. Madja's brown eyes roamed over his face and Azriel hadn't felt this way since the time when Rhys's mom had looked at him with loving motherly eyes.

“Don't ask me how the bond works, Shadowsinger. The Cauldron knows how it does things.”

Azriel could sleep less after that. Madja had left him with more questions than answers. And, on that note, Azriel began to fly over Velaris more often. For some reason, he felt she was close. The bond hadn't snapped into place yet, but he knew that the time was near when that would happen. He didn't even know if it had snapped for her yet, all he knew was that he had a mate over there, too far away from him, and too scared for him to stand idly by.

Eventually, Azriel had to talk to Rhysand. Rhys, his high lord, his best friend, his brother. Probably the only person in the Inner Circle who could fully understand how he felt at those moments. Because Azriel felt he was going to lose his mind if he didn't find his mate and end whatever suffering she was going through. The uncertainty was eating him alive and the hours of hopelessness and fear that were going on inside him, around that emptiness in his chest, did not ease things at all. If he felt this way from the comfort of his home, he didn't want to imagine what she was going through.

Rhysand agreed to allow him more outings to enlarge the perimeter of his search, but the passing days proved his effort fruitless.

“Everything okay, brother?”

Cassian had met his mate. Nesta, Feyre's sister. Azriel was very happy for him, very happy that his brothers had found their life mates and that he could realize the good they brought into their lives. But there was a huge shadow that haunted him, beyond the darkness he carried with him, and it had much to do with the guilt of not being able to find and deliver his mate from suffering. He no longer knew how much time had passed. His shadows stirred restlessly every day, with every memory, with every gale.

Azriel sighed when he felt Cassian's hand on his left shoulder, as they both stood watching Velaris from the top of a mountain.

“I don't know what to do anymore, Cassian,” Azriel let out, his shoulders slumping under the pressure and stress.

He usually didn't talk about the subject of his mate with his brothers, not as often as someone would think to be so close. It was something Azriel held close to his heart and wanted to resolve on his own, but so many failures were beginning to weigh him down.

Cassian patted his shoulder and then gave it a squeeze, trying to silently comfort him, though he knew that would do little to soothe the clamor in his soul. Because, though the bond hadn't snapped for Azriel, he could well believe that he had had it tugging at his chest in an unfamiliar direction for months now. Even if he didn't feel the bond, the mere acknowledgement of its existence was agony, especially when it didn't help him find his mate.

Cassian sighed beside him, letting a few seconds pass in silence before speaking again, his gaze fixed on Velaris' expanse and his heart shrinking at the visible suffering on his brother's face.

“Rhysand is traveling to the camp, will you accompany us?”

Azriel lately had little desire for anything other than touring Velaris and the surrounding area of the Court of Nightmares looking for his mate, but this time he decided to accept. For some reason, Azriel decided to accompany them.

The Night had been feuding with the Summer for a couple of years. Tarquin and Rhysand… were not on the best of terms. The last time Feyre had traveled to the Summer, pregnant with Nyx, Tarquin and his army had held her captive because of a misunderstanding in the information they had obtained from the Spring Court and the Mortal Lands. Rhysand almost destroyed the entire Summer Court with his bare hands if not for Cassian and Azriel, who were able to broker a deal between the two as mediators. It was a very tense time at the beginning.

Mind you, Rhysand did not leave without letting Tarquin know that it would be years before they would return to the same trade, diplomatic and friendly relations as before, if they could ever speak of forgiveness. Azriel remembered how the only person from the Night Court who could cross Tarquin's lands, for a time, was Mor. They were all warned and the meetings of the high lords were suspended, at least with respect to attendance.

For that reason, Rhysand became extremely wary of anyone connected with the Summer Court and for him, being the high lord, it was not too much work to know who wandered near his lands. They had already captured a handful of Summer Court spies in recent years and held them captive in camp with the Ilyrian soldiers.

Of course, the Night Court was much more careful with their spying, having Shadowsinger himself on their side. Azriel had visited the Summer Court a couple of times by stealth, handing Rhysand reports and any strategic breakthroughs he could decipher.

There was one, however, that they could not foresee. Someone Azriel never knew was coming out of the Summer Court. It had been a couple of years since then and it seemed the Ilyrians had been unable to break the spy's stone will.

“Are you going all the way to the mountain?” Rhysand had stopped in front of Azriel as soon as his feet touched the grassy ground, a few feet from the entrance to the camp. His eyes flicked briefly to the bustle behind his high lord, his shoulders tensing unconsciously as he took slow steps towards Rhysand with his hands in the pockets of his tunic and his wings tucked neatly behind his back. Cassian landed behind him, kicking up a layer of wet grass and mud that soiled his boots.

“Argh.”

“I think I'll be at a distance this time.”

Rhysand nodded, with no intention of convincing Azriel to accompany him to give the imprisoned spies of the Summer a death scare.

“I hope the screams are worth this mudslinging,” Cassian spoke up, moving closer to his two friends, forming a small circle. Rhysand barely gave him a glance before turning on his heels and beginning to make his way to the entrance of the camp, where some of the soldiers were clustered to see the high lord. “You're going to be in the bay?”

“Yes,” Azriel walked alongside Cassian, scowling at the entrance through which Rhysand had just crossed, the Ilyrian soldiers freezing in front of their high lord. “I'll watch from afar. Right now I don't have the stomach for anything.”

“I understand, brother,” Cassian squeezed his shoulder again amicably, sending him a tight-lipped look. Cassian was quite good with words, despite many labeling him as insensitive for being Ilyrian, but he knew Azriel well enough to know when he wanted to talk about something and when he preferred not to. “See you then.”

Cassian followed in Rhysand's footsteps, approaching in long strides, while Azriel paused watching his companions disappear into the distance.

Sighing, the knot in his chest tightened. It was so strange to have a void that could feel so many things. Azriel often wondered how it was possible that he still didn't feel the bond, when his emotions had expanded out of his head and there was no longer a feeling he didn't sense inside his bones.

Flapping his wings to take flight, Azriel set off towards the bay, close to the cliff where Rhysand planned to take the Summer Court spies. He was a few yards away, close enough to make out figures, but not too far away that he couldn't hear the screams.

As soon as his feet touched the ground, damp despite the early rising sun, his shadows began to stir around him, restless. They must've sensed his nervousness, the anxiety that ran through his chest like electric currents to his fingertips, causing him to spasm and break out in a cold sweat. Azriel could barely see them moving around him, separating from his body and stirring on the ground just a few centimeters before turning back.

At the top of the cliff he could already make out the figures of Rhysand and Cassian, walking menacingly towards the inmates, leaving them no choice but to keep walking backwards until they fell into the void, where Cassian would then land them, one by one. Azriel could hear them if he wanted to, but his mind and his shadows kept him a bit distracted.

He barely made out the first screams and the sound of Cassian's wings when his shadows began to whisper, much more restless.

Close.

Help.

Fear.

Help.

Azriel raised his head and his eyes stopped just short of Rhysand's figure in front of about three spies. At that moment, Azriel's shadows took off, moving at great speed across the grass and stones, with the Shadowsinger unable to do anything to stop them, though he tried. His confused gaze swept over the small figures on the cliff, with such speed that his head was beginning to ache, but he couldn't recognize anything.

He was about to fly in the direction his shadows had gone, when a strange, overwhelming sensation, somewhere between irrational fear and deep sadness, sent his back to the ground moving across his chest, as one of the figures slipped and fell into the void. Azriel felt all the air stolen from his lungs, opening his mouth to try to catch his breath, as those sensations coursed through his entire body and settled in his chest, taking strong root as if they belonged there. They were so overwhelming that they caused him physical pain. The ache he must've been feeling for months.

The bond.

The few remaining shadows beside him whispered endlessly.

Help.

Azriel raised his head, breathing hard. He felt his chest split open, as if with great force they were breaking his sternum to pull out his heart. It was such an overwhelming and painful sensation that, but for his strong will, he would surely have lost consciousness.

Help.

Mate.

Azriel thought afterwards that he had never moved so fast or with such force as that moment, when he realized what was happening. The adrenaline that coursed through his body, even feeling electric currents run through him from head to toe from the precise moment he felt the bond, didn't allow him to think too much about how the air hurt his eyes because he already knew exactly where he had to go. He had spent so much time flying without direction, walking the wrong paths and searching in empty places. At that moment, when he had a reason and a direction, Azriel couldn't think of anything else. He didn't want to.

He could only look at the figure falling off the cliff from the moment he raised his head. He could only head blindly towards it. The overwhelming fear that threw him backwards was the fear she felt as under her feet she felt the void, her hands moving forward trying to hold on to something that would allow her to live.

Azriel felt like he was about to die with her.

He met Cassian halfway from afar, who seemed to be about to fly in her direction to catch her when he ran into his friend, but Azriel moved too quickly and with anticipation without losing sight of his mate. The chill that ran through his body could've paralyzed him with fear, but how could he stand by and do nothing when his mate was falling to her undisputed death.

He thought he heard Rhysand's scream. Surely it was so, but in his mind there hovered only the thought that he must reach her, he must get there in time. Her hands were outstretched and Azriel stretched out his hands, hoping that would help him move faster.

Mind blank, Azriel felt like he had just pulled his head out of the water, his chest opening in an unfamiliar thrill as his body felt the warmth of his mate's body crashing against him and his arms wrapped around her in a promise to never let go again. His wings wrapped around her immediately after his arms, impacting a few seconds later against the muddy ground.

He was too close to not catch her. The thought left him breathless.

For a moment, he only heard his and her labored breathing, with the whistling of the wind through the trees and the movement of the water of a stream a few feet away. For a moment, Azriel went completely blank. Whether he was there or dreaming, he didn't know.

His hands clamped tightly around her arms, encircling her entire back, feeling the reality of what had happened sink in on him bit by bit. Fear gripped him once more then, considering that there was a chance he hadn't been there to stop that. To prevent it.

He didn't want to move. Still adrenaline coursed through his body and he was so alert that he could clearly hear the voices of his friends in the distance. Seconds later, when he heard their wings, he finally moved.

Azriel met your eyes and with that look alone he knew you had felt the bond as well.

“I'm sorry,” was all Azriel could think of, his eyes crystallizing, voice breaking. “I'm so sorry.”

You were transfixed. Azriel felt you looking at him with fear and that motivated him to move away from your body, but you gripped his arms tightly to hold him in place.

Azriel felt a great heaviness in his chest as he examined your face and what he saw did not please him at all. Guilt swelled on his shoulders, a great weight that ascended with each passing second and he could hardly imagine all that you had had to go through in that camp. You were right under his nose and he couldn't find you. What kind of a partner was he to let all that happen?

When he heard the footsteps of his friends, his shoulders tensed. But it didn't go unnoticed the way you also became aware of their presence and let go of his arms, rushing to hug yourself as you moved to sit behind Azriel. scared. Still breathing rapidly, Azriel sent a warning look. Cassian and Rhysand stopped a short distance away, noticing the obvious hostility emanating from their friend's body, but Rhysand just stopped for a second.

“Azriel, what the fuck?”

Rhysand was so angry that he seemed to have a little red tinge over his face. Good, he was angry, maybe then Azriel wouldn't feel so bad about breaking his face.

“Rhys,” Cassian frowned, quickly picking up on the tense and hostile atmosphere around him. He grabbed the arm of his high lord, who jerked angrily and turned his gaze back to the Shadowsinger.

“What the fuck is wrong with you? Are you aware of what you just fucking did?”

“Rhysand,” Cassian stopped his high lord, raising his voice and holding his arm tightly this time.

Rhysand turned to look at him with a frown and it seemed that, through his mind, Cassian spoke to him. The next time Rhysand looked back at him, his expression was unclenching, but Azriel stood stone-faced in front of you, his hands clasped at his sides and ready to face anything.

“No way,” was all Rhysand muttered, moving to run his hands through his hair.

Azriel felt one of your hands on his back, his senses splitting in half to try and attend to you as he kept an eye on his brothers on the other side. He moved his head to look at you, your frightened expression trying to hide you from Cassian's curious eyes.

“Is this real?”

Azriel felt his heart crumple. Tears welled behind his eyes and burning hurted the back of his throat. He wanted to say so many things, apologize for a million other things, but in that moment he only responded, moving to squeeze your hand:

“It's real.”

#azriel #azriel x reader #azriel shadowsinger #acotar #azriel acotar #acotar fanfiction #azriel x you #acotar x reader #acotar imagine #rhysand #cassian #the cliff

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stranger-nightmare · 2 years

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𝐑𝐨𝐜𝐤 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐍𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭

Pairing: Steve Harrington x (female) Reader x Eddie Munson

Summary: hooking up with your boyfriend Steve at a party when Eddie accidentally walks in and, well, one thing leads to another…

Warnings: alcohol consumption but everyone’s still aware enough to consent, smut, mean dom Steve, soft dom Eddie, semi-public sex I guess?, fingering, threesome (m+m+f), penetrative sex (m+f), anal sex (m+f), degradation kink / name-calling, one mildly sexist dirty talk comment??, praise kink, manhandling, hair pulling, choking, orgasm denial / delay, minors DNI

A/N: title is from Rock the Night by Europe bc I was listening to it whilst I wrote this lmao! anyways yeah I hope you guys have fun with this one, I certainly did writing it <33

p.s. just to forewarn you this is kinda long, but I promise it’s worth it!!

This is for people 18+ only. Minors do not read on. By clicking ‘keep reading’ you are hereby agreeing that you are 18 or older.

You moan into Steve’s mouth as his hands run up your thighs, edging towards the hem of your skirt. Your hands tangle into the soft curls of hair at the back of his neck, pulling lightly. Steve chuckles softly against your lips.

“So needy” he teases as he moves his lips to kiss across your jaw. “So desperate you wanna get off right here, on the floor of this random bedroom, where anyone from this lame party could walk in and see at any moment?” He teases you as his hands slide further up your thighs, moving to cup your ass and pull you closer to him.

You were both currently sat on the floor at the foot of the bed, lounging on a pile of cushions that had been left there. It hadn’t taken two seconds for you and your boyfriend to take your seats and begin making out heavily once you’d found the empty room, not even bothering to lock the door behind you.

You just moan and pull his hair again to answer his question. You arch your back, pushing your tits closer to his face as his lips trail down your neck. You gasp lightly when you feel one of Steve fingers run across your panties, pushing lightly into your slit, not enough for you to really feel anything, but enough to tease you and get your head spinning from more than just the alcohol you’d consumed. You buck your hips forward, pushing against Steve’s hand.

It’s then that you hear the sound of the door opening.

“Oh shit, sorry! My bad” someone slurs as they stumble through the door, beer spilling onto the floor.

You look up only to be met with the dark round eyes of your best friend. Eddie.

Eddie stares wide eyed, taking in the scene in front of him. You and Steve on the floor, your skirt hitched up, with Steve’s hand beneath it, between your legs.

You and Eddie both open your mouths to say something. But your speech is cut short when another loud moan escapes you, caused by Steve brazenly pushing his fingers against your clit. You gasp and mewl as your hips involuntarily rut against Steve’s hand as he rubs your clit through your panties, your wetness soaking through the thin fabric.

Steve just continues his movements, watching as you pathetically hump his hand, unable to help yourself. All the while you and Eddie keep your eyes locked on each other. Eddie stares at you with his mouth hanging open, completely mesmerised by the scene in front of him. The view of you rutting and humping, so desperate for friction you didn’t even care that your friend was there watching as this all went down.

“You like what you see?” Steve taunts Eddie darkly.

Eddie stammers awkwardly. Of course he liked what he saw. It was only his dream every single night, to see you like this. Granted in his dreams it was usually his hand between your legs, but he guessed this was the next best thing.

“Dude, if you think she looks good you should see how fucking good she feels” Steve carries on, seemingly unfazed by the fact that there was another man watching as he touched you. “So wet and warm, always so tight no matter how many times I’ve fucked her” Steve smirks.

Both you and Eddie moan softly at Steve’s words.

“You wanna come see for yourself, Munson? Feel for yourself?” Steve removes his hand from you, leaning back casually against the foot of the bed.

You whine and look at Eddie desperately, saddened by the loss of touch, your aching pussy grinding against nothing.

Eddie looks rapidly back and forth between you and Steve, unsure of the proposition. You knew Eddie liked you; you’d been friends forever and you could just sense it. And honestly, if it wasn’t for Steve, you probably would be with Eddie. You couldn’t deny that you’d thought about similar scenarios with him on quite a few occasions, despite dating Steve.

“I- are you sure man?” Eddie narrows his eyes at Steve.

Steve looks over to you; “if she’s okay with it.”

You look back at Eddie, at how his eyes were drinking in the sight of you. You were fairly certain you could see the beginning of a tent in his ripped jeans. You keep your eyes on Eddie as you sit up on your knees. You then slowly drag your hands down your body, over your breasts, pulling your tight shirt down until there was very little left to the imagination. You trail your fingers down your thighs until you reach the hem of your skirt. You grab the hem and slowly pull it up your body, flashing your panties at Eddie, who’s eyes remain completely transfixed by your every move.

“Please” you whisper.

And that was all the motivation Eddie needed. He slams the door behind him, locking it quickly. He puts his beer bottle down on the desk and practically knee slides over to you on the floor.

One of his hands cups the back of your neck, the warmth of your flushed skin contrasting against the cold metal of Eddie’s rings. Eddie’s other hand goes to cup your throbbing pussy, rubbing over your mound teasingly. You moan pathetically again.

“Eddie please” you whimper. “Touch me.”

“Needy little thing, isn’t she?” Steve taunts.

“Mmm” Eddie hums his agreement as he palms your pussy a little harder, causing you to whine and pout your lips.

Eddie smirks as he takes his hand and finally tucks it under your panties, two of his fingers finding their way between your folds. You shiver and gasp softly as his fingers run along your slit.

“Oh fuck, she’s so wet” Eddie groans.

Steve lets out cocky scoff.

“I know, she’s been fucking needy all night” Steve leans towards you as he speaks, uttering the last line right against your earlobe; “it’s pathetic.”

Eddie just groans again as he gathers your slick. Your body arched forwards, your hands landing on Eddie’s shoulders to steady yourself. Your eyes almost roll into the back of your head when you feel Eddie’s finger breach your entrance, pushing inside you gently. You moan again and focus your lust-blown eyes on Eddie’s.

“Yeah, you feeling a lil needy sweetheart?” Eddie coos softly as he continues to watch your face. “This what you’ve been wanting?” He tilts his head at you as his finger pushes deeper inside you, his knuckle brushing against your entrance.

You pout your lips and nod. You certainly had been needy all night, pestering Steve until he’d finally snapped and slammed you into the nearest empty room. You’d thought you’d be spending the night with Steve’s fingers inside you. You’d never imagined your secret wet dream of having Eddie fuck you would ever actually come true. And yet here you were, with Eddie’s finger so deep in your pussy you could feel the kiss of his rings against your hole.

You let out another moan as you revel in the moment, your literal wet dream coming true. Your thighs tremble as they hold you up, your hips bucking as you grind against Eddie’s hand. Eddie clocks your desperation and decides to take mercy on you.

“Don’t worry sweetheart, I’ve got you” he hums, pushing another finger inside you.

You lurch forward at the sensation, your legs almost buckling, but Eddie holds you steady by the back of your neck.

“This feel good baby?” Eddie asks just as he brings his thumb to brush against your clit.

You gasp at the extra sensation, biting your lip to stop yourself from moaning loud enough for the rest of the party to hear you. Your hips start to hump Eddie’s hand even faster, racing your way towards a climax which you’d been so desperately chasing all evening.

You chance a look over to Steve to see him watching you intently. You moan and almost cum right then when you notice Steve palming himself through his jeans as he watches Eddie finger-fuck you.

“You’re close, huh, princess?” Steve questions as he keeps palming himself. “Eddie making you feel good with his fingers hmm?”

There’s a wicked edge in Steve’s voice that almost unnerves you. You just stare at Steve, nodding lightly as you carry on fucking yourself onto Eddie’s expert fingers, your body so close to release.

“Good” Steve smirks evilly. “Stop” he says flatly.

Both your hips and Eddie’s fingers falter in their motions as you both whip your heads to look at Steve.

“I said, stop” Steve commands slowly, emphasising each word.

Eddie obeys swiftly, his fingers stopping their motions and pulling out of you. Your climax retreats, your body feeling empty and aching with need. You whine, something akin to a cry, tears almost welling your eyes as you’re left feeling even more needy and desperate than you were to begin with.

Steve sits up to lean his face close to yours.

“You’re not getting off that easy baby, not after you’ve been bugging me all evening” he taunts. “You wanna whine and beg like a slut all evening? Well now you’re gonna get exactly what you want princess; you’re gonna get fucked like the little slut you are” he seethes through his teeth.

Your pussy clenches over nothing at the promise.

“We’re gonna show Eddie here just what a filthy whore you are” Steve adds savagely as he begins to undo his jeans, opening the zip but not freeing himself just yet.

“You sure about this man?” Eddie questions.

“You’ve been wanting to fuck her for ages, right?” Steve shrugs. “Well, now’s your chance.”

Steve grabs the back of his shirt and pulls it off him in one fluid motion, in the way he knows drives you wild.

Eddie looks to you quickly; “are you sure about this baby?”

Instead of answering him you just close the gap between the two of you and push your lips against his. You both moan into the kiss, your mouths opening up to each other almost immediately. Your hands paw at the hem of his shirt, signalling to him you wanted it off. He obliges quickly and tosses it to the side. You moan again as you feel his soft skin underneath your hands as they wondered all over his torso. Eddie’s hands cup your neck, his fingers caressing the back of your head, leaving you no room to move. Eddie almost didn’t care about anything or anyone else, in this moment he simply wished to keep your lips on his forever.

You then feel another pair of hands snake around your waist. Steve’s hands tug on your shirt, pulling it up and untucking it from your skirt. A small whine escapes you as you have to part ways with Eddie’s lips when Steve lifts your shirt over your head.

“Holy shit” Eddie groans quietly.

It’s then that you remember you hadn’t worn a bra tonight and it was your bare chest that was now staring Eddie in the face.

“She’s got nice tits huh?” Steve says almost proudly.

“Hell yeah man” Eddie practically grins.

“Go on, feel them. They’re fucking perfect” Steve smirks.

Eddie dives towards you again, his lips recapturing yours. But now his hands palm your tits, kneading and pinching them, learning their shape. You whine into Eddie’s mouth when he pinches your nipples between his fingers. You can feel the smirk on his lips.

“You’re so fucking beautiful” Eddie moans into your mouth.

You grip Eddie’s hair, your body arching up against his chest. Behind you you feel the rough fabric of Steve’s jeans rubbing against your ass. His hands on your hips pull you back against the tent at his crotch. Steve’s hands then hike up your skirt, his fingers hooking into the waistband of your panties. You have to pull away from Eddie momentarily as Steve pulls your panties down your legs. Eddie helps to support your torso as you shift your weight on each leg, letting Steve pull the underwear completely off you and tossing them aside to where their two shirts were.

Your hands rake down Eddie’s stomach, leaving red marks in their wake. You undo his belt and the zip to his jeans, palming him through his boxers, feeling how hard he already was for you. Eddie smirks softly at you as you look up at him doe-eyed. He pushes his jeans and boxers down his thighs, freeing his already leaking cock. You instinctively moan at the sight of it. You subconsciously noted that he was similar in size to Steve, if not a bit thicker. You were about to reach for him when Eddie’s hands grab your hips and pull you forwards, your body ending up flush against his. You gasp at the sudden move, but your gasp is quick to turn into a moan when you feel Eddie's cock between your thighs, resting just below where you were so desperately craving him.

Behind you Steve continues to let his hands roam over your body, just letting Eddie have his moment with you first. Eddie slides a hand around your back, keeping you steady. His other hand grabs his cock, guiding it through your folds to gather the wetness that and gathered there. Eddie moans softly as he feels your warmth and your wetness. You buck your hips again, grinding along his cock, overwhelmed with the absolute dizzying need for your pussy to be touched, to be filled.

Finally, Eddie’s tip lines up with your entrance. A high pitched whimper escapes your throat as he slowly sinks inside you. There’s a small burn that mixes with the deep ache inside your cunt as his girth stretches you out.

“Oh fuck. Shit” Eddie whimpers as he pushes in further. “Shit, she’s so tight” he pants, he’s eyes screwing shut, his head tossed back as he revels in the feeling of you.

“Told ya” Steve scoffs as he moves his hand to palm your ass cheek roughly. "No matter how many times I fuck her like the whore she is she still feels tight as a virgin. Like fucking heaven huh?” Steve looks over your shoulder at Eddie.

“Yes, fuck” Eddie groans again as he slowly starts to move his hips, building up a thrusting motion.

Your nails dig into his bare shoulders as you fight to keep yourself upright. Just as you’d managed to steady yourself you feel the head of Steve’s cock brush against your ass, his tip just pushing in between your cheeks. You whimper, feeling Steve’s pre-cum spread over your tight hole as he rubs against it. You hear Steve spit before you feel the warmth of it between your cheeks as he lubricates himself and your ass. The next thing you feel is Steve’s hand pulling open your cheeks, the head of his cock pushing slightly harder against your hole as he prepares to enter you. You crash forwards with the force of Steve pushing you from behind, falling into Eddie’s chest.

“Shhh it’s okay. You can take him sweetheart” Eddie hums softly against your head, his hands rubbing over your back soothingly.

You cry out, your fingers digging painfully into Eddie’s flesh as Steve finally breaches your hole. Your body shakes, both pain and pleasure flaring through you, as Steve slowly pushes himself as deep as he could inside you. He grunts as he sinks himself into you to the hilt.

“You’re doing so good baby” Eddie murmurs against your head. “Just relax, we’ve got you” he continues to stroke your back, rubbing small circles into your skin.

Eddie keeps still for a moment, letting you adjust as Steve slowly starts to thrust into you. He grunts with each thrust, his hands palming your ass cheeks roughly. After a few thrusts the pain starts to subside and you feel your body become alight with pleasure again, feeling so deliciously full having both men inside you.

You let out a choked gasp when you feel Steve’s hand wrap around your throat, pulling you off Eddie’s chest and into his. Your back arches awkwardly as Steve holds you against him. Eddie finally takes the opportunity to pick up his thrusts again, pushing in and out of you in time with Steve. Steve’s hand cups your throat, his index finger pushing against your chin, tilting it up towards the ceiling.

“How’d you feel now princess? Stuffed full of cock like the slut you are. Is this what you so desperately wanted, hmm?” Steve seethes against your earlobe.

You just whimper in response, your lower lip trembling. Steve barks a harsh laugh.

“Look at you, so cock drunk you can’t even answer me.”

You cry out as Steve slams hard into you, both him and Eddie starting to pick up the pace. Your body practically goes slack between them, their arms and their bodies being the only things holding you up as they both fuck into you. Steve grunts and groans loudly as he pounds you. It was sounds you’d heard a thousand times before but still never tired of.

But Eddie... Eddie on the other hand... He was whimpering and moaning; soft noises you’d never have imagined would leave the mouth of your metalhead best friend. Let alone the fact that those soft sweet noises were because he was balls deep inside your aching pussy.

Eddie leans forward, his head dipping so he could latch his lips to your neck. You sigh contently at the gentle feeling of his lips kissing all over your neck and your shoulders, your collarbones, anywhere he could get around where Steve’s hand still held your throat.

“Mmmm you’re being so good for us sweetheart, taking both our cocks like a good girl” Eddie murmurs against your skin as he kisses along your shoulder and across your left collarbone.

“More like a good little slut” Steve hisses sharply, moving his hand up to grab your jaw between his fingers.

Steve twists your head to the side, forcing you to look back at him. His fingers dug painfully into your cheeks, your lips pursed awkwardly as he looked down at you with a wicked gleam in his eyes.

“Hmm?” Steve taunts you dangerously. “One cock just wasn’t gonna to be enough for you huh? You needed both of us to fill you up, greedy little thing aren’t you?” His fingers squeeze your cheeks on his last sentence.

You whimper pitifully as you look up at him with pleading eyes.

“I didn’t quite catch that” Steve mocks. “I said,” he seethes through gritted teeth, “you’re a greedy little thing, aren’t you?”

For emphasis he slams his hips against your ass with extra force, causing your legs to almost buckle as you whimper again. Thank gods you were so securely wedged between the boys’ bodies that there was no way you could fall. You were fairly certain your legs weren’t holding your own weight up at this point anyway.

You manage to nod your head lightly, despite Steve’s hand still cupping your jaw like a vice.

“Y-y-yes” is all you manage to whisper with a shaky breath.

Steve just huffs a satisfied grunt at your answer, roughly letting go of your jaw. With Steve’s hand no longer there to support your head you let yourself fall forwards against Eddie, your face resting on his chest, your fingers clinging desperately to his shoulders again as you tried to keep yourself upright. You knew Eddie would have scratch marks lasting a week down his back after this as you clawed at him.

Eddie’s arm that’s wrapped around your torso holds you tighter, pulling you closer against his chest, leaving you no room to slip. Eddie’s other hand gripped your hip, his thumb stroking small, reassuring circles against your skin. Eddie’s hands were soft and comforting against your body, they were steadying and grounding whilst your mind and body was spinning from all the sensations. Alternatively, Steve’s hands were as rough and as brutal as his thrusts as he gripped your body.

Steve then grabs the back of your neck again. He lifts your head up off Eddie’s shoulders, getting your attention back on him, your head twisted awkwardly as you try to look back at Steve. His eyes are aflame with wickedness as you feel his other hand slowly snake it’s way up your body, trailing from your hips, to your belly button, then up the centre of your stomach, up to just below your breasts. Steve’s hand then travels even higher, up your chest, until eventually he finds his mark at your neck.

Steve’s fingers wrap around your throat. You wheeze a small moan before you feel him start to apply pressure, his fingers squeezing your neck.

“Look at me” Steve commands, pulling harshly on your hair, tilting your face up to look at him. “I want you to look at Eddie as you cum. I want him to see your face as you cum over both our cocks like the dirty whore you are” he smiles wickedly.

Your mouth opens in a silent cry as his other hand tightens even further around your throat. At the same time Eddie’s hand moves from your hip, sliding down your body until his fingers found your clit. A shuddering whimper bubbles in your throat as your body reels with pleasure, the sensations almost becoming overwhelming. Your whimper almost sounds like more like a sob, tears stinging your eyes as you look up to ceiling, as if you’d find help there.

“Come on baby, cum for us” Eddie leans forward to nose your cheek, his breath fanning over your face.

“I can’t- it’s too- too much” you cry, your entire body on fire.

Steve yanks your hair again, forcing your eyes back to him.

“Too bad” he whispers wickedly. “You will cum for us” he grunts even as his own thrusts start to falter.

“Yes you can, you can do it sweetheart” Eddie whispers against your cheek. “Cum for us, baby.”

Eddie’s fingers moved faster against your clit as he spoke, bringing you right to the precipice of pleasure. Steve looks at your face and knows you’re right there, right about to tip over into your climax.

“That’s it baby, show Eddie here how fucking hot you look when you cum. Let him hear how good you sound” Steve growls.

At the last second Steve releases the grip on your neck, oxygen finally flowing back through you. He carries on holding the back of your head with his other hand, holding your head up, like you were a doll on display; keeping your head in place so Eddie would have the perfect view of your face as you fell apart.

“Oh fuck” your barely manage to choke out as the waves of pleasure finally crash through your body.

Your entire body shakes and convulses, your pussy and your thighs clenching with each roll of pleasure. Your eyes look pleadingly at Eddie as you completely unravel, your mouth open, jaw slack, pathetic gurgled moaning being the only sound leaving your lips.

“Doesn’t she look fucking perfect?” Steve grunts as he keeps rutting into you. “Feels so fucking good when her pussy squeezes you doesn’t it?” He taunts Eddie.

“Shit, man” Eddie’s eyes screw shut as his hips stutter. “Oh fuck, she feels fucking incredible” Eddie moans, his eyes heavily lidded as he tries desperately to keep looking at you.

The feeling of your pussy tightening around him paired with Steve’s filthy words were finally enough to tip Eddie over the edge too. Your pussy continues to clench around Eddie as you feel his cock twitch. You moan again as you feel Eddie’s warmth flood inside you, a loud grunt falling from his lips. Eddie’s hips push hard against you, pushing as deep as he could inside you. The position has you rutting your hips back further against Steve, whose hips slowly start to stutter as he approaches his own climax.

Steve gives a final loud grunt as he too finally climaxes. His fingers dig roughly into your skin and you knew you’d have bruises to show for it the next day. You lift one arm up and wrap it around Steve’s head, twisting your fingers in his hair as he ruts through his orgasm.

Their paces may have slowed but both boys continue to slowly thrust into you, even as they both came inside you. You could feel your cunt get sticky as Eddie essentially fucks his cum back out of you with long and deep thrusts. You can feel a mixture of both yours and Eddie’s fluids leak down your thighs.

Once everyone had ridden out their highs the boys finally stop their movements, just staying still for a moment as you all caught your breath. Eddie’s hands go back to stroking your back as you slump against him again.

“Good girl” he whispers. “You did so well for us.”

Steve scoffs harshly and places a slap to your ass, causing your body to jolt.

“You satisfied now hmm?” He teases. “Feeling all good and fucked out?”

You just nod your head pathetically in response.

“Good” he smirks.

It’s then that you feel Steve placing soft kisses up your back. You should be taken aback by the sudden tenderness but you knew that this is just what Steve was like. He could be mean and cruel whilst fucking you, but afterwards he was always soft and sweet with you. It was one of the many things you loved about him.

“Come on baby, let Eddie and I clean you up hmm?” Steve kisses the back of your right shoulder.

You again just nod, not having the energy or strength to do much else.

“Don’t worry sweetheart, we’ll take care of you. We’ve got you” Eddie reassures you gently.

Masterlist

A/N: hehe sorry for how long it is but also not sorry bc I hope you enjoyed it!! <33

Taglist // Join My Nightmare Realm // Ko-fi

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lmao-liz · 5 days

Text

long distance video calls with soap

my first time writing anything and it’s smut ish. i’m usually a reader and recommender but god do I love this concept

cw: phone sex, mutual masterbation, vibrator use, voyeurism. (let me know if I missed anything)

you and johnny are in a new relationship. it’s your first relationship where the guys got an actual career. he’s someone important, he can’t tell you the details just that it’s demanding and can be dangerous at times.

you embrace the long distance phone calls and rare video chats. it’s worth it because when he’s home it's unlike anything you’ve ever felt before. you know he’s military or something along those lines, the time differences and crazy schedules make it obvious.

after a few months together he opens up. tells you about the team, his cap, gaz, and of course simon. how the long hours and being away all the time gets to the team, he’s pissed none of them ever talk about it.

him having someone to come home to, it changed his mindset, he feels bad for them. it’s empathy, a bit of pity. he’s having such a good time with you, it’s not new for him to want to share the things he loves with his teammates.

the team just got settled into bed, working for almost two days straight in some random country, everyone was out as soon as they hit their pillows, deployment’s running too long. it feels like an eternity since he’s seen you, felt you. he knows he has to keep external contact as low as possible, but the thought of seeing you. it’s his forbidden fruit.

he’s a catholic, in hindsight not a great one, he kills, does unspeakable things for his job. so what’s another tally? one that he knows he deserves, because he’s been working so hard, it would be worth it.

the video call only rings twice before you pick up.

5:33 am.

he should be sorry for waking you up, but he needs you. you answer in the darkness of your room face illuminated by your phone screen. the lights are off in the barracks but you can see him in his bunk, shirtless, an arm tucked behind his head.

he looks like the product of a wet dream. one of which you’ve had too many of to be relaxed seeing him like this. he asks you what you’re wearing, tells you he needs you. he’s desperate, working long hours, going through all kinds of shitty situations. he says he’ll return the favour once he’s home. you know he will, he always does.

you don’t resist when he asks you to lift your shirt. you know he’s been working so hard, it’s the least you could do. he tells you to grab the vibrator he got you just before he left. knows how sometimes you need it quick and strong, not afraid of you liking it more than him, he knows how desperate you get while he’s gone for long periods of time.

he’s whispering praise to you, you can see the movement of his arm behind the screen. the laptop propped up on his drool worthy abs. it’s quick, the vibrator hitting in just the right spot, johnnys not the only desperate one. you haven’t seen him in months.

johnny knows he should turn his volume down. the sounds of your pleasure are bouncing off the walls of the small barracks. he just can’t help himself, too focused on your contorted face, your sounds, the quiet hum of your vibrator.

it should be embarrassing how fast he comes, but seeing you, even through a screen, it's more than he’s had, his imagination can’t compare to seeing the real thing. his grunts and heavy breathing are enough to push you over the edge. you both writhe in pleasure, thousands of miles between you too, but it’s not enough to keep you apart. you’re even more tired, a good orgasm and seeing johnny, you know he can’t stay on the line longer, but you want nothing more than to actually get a chance to talk.

he tells you he’ll be home soon, make up for him being gone longer than he said he would be. he wishes you a good night saying he's got another busy day tomorrow. you blow him a kiss goodbye, making him promise to come home safe.

“alweys dae lass”

the call ends, you set the vibrator and your phone back on your nightstand, rolling over and drifting back into dreamland.

johnny sets the laptop to his side, wondering how he’s going to clean himself up without waking everyone up. just when he’s about to say fuck it and sacrifice his boxers, a box of tissues hits his shoulder. he catches it before it hits the ground and looks to the bunk across the small room, he can see the outline of the infamous skull mask staring back at him.

“didn't know you had such a pretty bird waiting for you back home johnny”

he swears he sees simon adjusting himself beneath his blankets. but it’s dark, he hasn’t slept in almost 40 hours. it’s just his mind playing tricks on him right?

is this actually good? I like it but it’s a word vomit of my thoughts so i’m insanely biased. do I continue writing or stick to recommendations…

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martiniblues · 7 months

Text

what a feeling ; 이민형

pairing idol!mark x female!reader

synopsis it’s not easy keeping your relationship with your idol boyfriend a secret, especially when he’s halfway across the country and would do anything to hop on a plane and get you in an instant. but little does he know that you’ve already beat him to that idea.

genre established relationship, a teeny tiny bit of angst, reader uses she!her pronouns and is described in a feminine way, so so so much fluff, mutual comfort, slightly suggestive.

wc 1.6k

song : what a feeling by one direction

mark: i would do anything in this world to be w you baby :(((

you: i knowwww but these next few weeks will go by so quick!!! we will be back together in no time<33

you quickly turned off your phone and adjusted your outfit for the hundredth time in the bathroom mirror. “i feel like i’m going to puke out my breakfast!” you leaned your back against the sink, facing one of mark’s staff members you had grown to befriend over your time as being mark’s girlfriend.

“it’s going to be fine. i promise you, he’s been doing nothing but talking about how much he misses you and begs his manager every chance he gets to let him fly out to you.” the words made you drop your head to avoid anyone seeing your flushed cheeks.

you and mark had been dating for awhile now, but it was your first time flying out to see him and see him perform outside of your home city.

what if he doesn’t want to see you?

what if he’s too stressed to see you?

“what if-“ you’re quickly cut off with multiple dings chiming from your friend’s phone. she quickly read the notifications and grabbed your arm.

“okay, they’re almost done running this last set, and then they’ll be back here.” she quickly drags you out of the hallway bathroom and into a new room.

a big white table sat against the wall with various foods, makeup, hair tools, and pieces of clothing scattered about. you noticed an oversized black and gray stripped hoodie that belonged to none other than your boyfriend. resisting the urge to grab it to warm your cold body, you hid behind the big white door, listening for any sound of the boys.

your heart began to race once you heard the hoots and hollers from the very familiar voices of mark’s members. talks of dinner and after-rehearsal plans hung in the air with no notice of mark’s voice.

the guys had already been informed of your plan, so when they greeted you with small hugs and smiles, you shouldn’t have been shocked. but there was no sign of your boyfriend anywhere among the eight men in front of you.

reading the puzzled look on your face, johnny answered, “he’s still working on his solo stage. the dumbass insisted he do it again, even though it’s perfect."

“if only he knew she was back here… man, he would forget all about being a perfectionist then.” yuta laughed as he joined johnny next to you.

“can you take me to him? i cant deal with the wait anymore.” you pouted, leaning against the wall, as you felt the wave of clattering butterflies begin to build in your stomach.

without a word, the two boys led you to the side of the stage where you could see mark sitting in a black chair, mic in hand, and body slouched back as he rapped smoothly.

it took everything in you to not run across the stage and pounce on him that instant, but something about the words coming out of his mouth and the vibe he carried in his subtle but sharp moves made you become entranced by him, as he always did to you.

“okay that was good, mark. we can rehearse more tomorrow!” a deep voice came over the speakers as the song stopped, leaving mark exhausted against his chair. your heart broke into a million little pieces, seeing the evident distress and exhaustion stitched in his figure.

“i think it looked perfect.” your mouth moved before your brain, not able to resist your boyfriend anymore. his head quickly snapped to your figure, which emerged into the stage lights only a few feet away from him.

“oh my god…” his voice came out quickly as his face pulled into an expression nothing less than shock, shooting up from his chair and bolting his body to yours.

his body slammed into yours before picking you up and spinning you around as his hands gripped onto you for dear life. “oh my fucking god” he let out again into your neck as you giggled and weaved your hands into his sweaty, messy hair.

“surpise!” you smiled so hard that you felt like your face might get stuck as you pulled back to look at mark, only to find him with the same expression.

“h-how… what? when did-“ his stuttering was quickly cut off by your lips on his. he slowly let your feet touch the ground and arched your body slightly as the kiss deepened quickly due to all the pent-up feelings the two of you shared for each other.

you couldn’t help your smile, teeth clanking slightly, before you pulled back to look at mark once again. “i couldn’t do the distance anymore. i had to see you.” your breathing came out ragged due to mark practically taking your breath away.

“you have no idea how close i was to flying out to you, baby” he said, swaying your bodies slightly, forgetting about the fact that you two were in the middle of a giant stage and had many people observing you.

“beat you to it though,” you sassed before a small ‘whatever’ left your boyfriend’s lips right as his fell onto yours again.

“this is so cute and everything, but can we please go eat?" haechan whined from one of the wings. the words made you two pull back in giggles, lacing your fingers together before following the guys off the stage.

“see you two lovebirds later!” johnny waved while you and mark got out of his car. “and be safe!” haechan added quickly. before mark was able to slap him for his suggestive comment, the brunette locked his passenger side door swiftly.

after the last few goodbyes, you and mark made way to his airbnb he rented for this multi-day show.

“i can't believe this,” you breathed, swinging your joined hands enthusiastically. “believe what?”

mark turned his body, quickly switching his hands so that he was still interlocked with you, but was now walking backwards facing you. a dopey smirk grew on his lips as you visibly reddened.

“this. us being here together finally.” you pulled him closer by his forearm, stopping the two of you directly in front of his door. not even reaching for his key, mark leaned down and kissed your lips for the thousandth time that night, but this one held a much greater weight than the rest.

his free hand perched itself on your lower back, warming the cool, exposed skin between your top and jeans. no matter how many times you and mark kissed (and maybe it was the prolonged distance causing this effect), this felt like the very first time.

chills blooming through every pore, heat taking over your body, brain melting into a mark-shaped puddle. he took over every sense, and you did the same to him.

“i love you so fucking much. i don’t think i can take this distance anymore.” he pulled back, lacking breath from your lips moving feverishly with his.

you two stood for a few heavy seconds, just staring at each other. if it weren’t for the dim light perched by the door, you wouldn’t have noticed the way mark’s eyes glossed over and how his lips pulled together into a straight line.

“i don’t think i can either.” you choked out, reaching for him again and pulling his body flush with yours. your hand raked itself in his hair, and the other wrapped its way around his broad shoulders. soft sniffles filled the now silent night, aside from the crickets chirping in the grass.

“i love you too.” you wiped his tears running down his soft cheeks and kissed them quickly before deciding to head inside.

the events following were slow and thoughtful. even if you both didn’t want to face the distance again, you knew it was inevitable.

you and mark were entangled in his bed. his head rested on your chest as he drew random swirls on your forearm while your other arm fell beneath his head. hand scratching his scalp repeatedly.

“i’ve never had this feeling before.” mark spoke into the silence. you moved your hand to tilt his head up level with yours. “what feeling?” you asked, assuming he was on the verge of falling asleep.

“just being beside you right now, holding you in my arms. it has me on fire. i’ve never felt this way about someone before."his eyes searched your face in a way that made you want to duck under the covers, but with his body practically on top of yours, that became undoable.

“me too. you make me feel things i didn’t even know were possible.” your words came out softly, embarrassed to be so vulnerable. "well, you could just say i’m amazing in bed but… i’ll take the more poetic version i guess.” you pushed his head away from you in annoyance at his dirty words.

“not like that, you freak!” the both of you giggled. mark pulled his body up to trap you beneath his arms. before you could even recover, he began littering your face with kisses.

“what a feeling!” he pulled away with a big smile on his face, teeth and all. it made you want to squeeze his cheeks from the sweetness of it all, but you resisted the urge.

“what a feeling!” you echoed, a smile pulling its way on your face in the same fashion as mark’s.

a few more kisses and loving gestures were exchanged before you two eventually fell asleep. consumed with this indescribable feeling rushing through your body, making you fall more and more in love.

if that was even possible.

note: 1D x nctdream is TOO GOOD. i’m seriously debating on making this a little series w the dreamies (let me know what songs you think of with what member!!!) anyway, love you lots and please leave a like or reblog if you enjoyed!!

#nct #nct dream #nct dream fic #nct fluff #mark lee #mark lee fic #mark lee fluff #mark lee imagines #nct 127 #nct 127 fic #mark lee x reader #mark lee scenarios #mark lee angst #mark lee x you #nct mark lee #nct mark

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chaotic-mystery · 8 months

Text

Pairing: dbf!joel x f!reader

Summary: The next morning you wake up confused about the previous night. You have to start making your life better, and doing tequila shots the first night home didn’t help.

Content warnings: eventual smut, 18+ only mdni!, eventual smut, mean Joel, enemies to lovers, daddy issues galore, swearing, hangovers, red thongs trying to be stolen, reader tried to smack Joel but that didn’t end good, Joel was nice for like 2 seconds, then mean Joel came out.

Word Count: 3.3K

A/N: Thank you all for the patience with me on this! I’m so ready to continue and show you were this is going. I love you. Enjoy 🖤

With the morning sun pouring into your small bedroom window, you felt a leg under yours, brows furrowed at the spare body parts. Fuck. What did I do last night? You lift your head and turn it to the right, noticing the messy head of black curls and suddenly your eyes go wide. Tommy. Did I fuck Tommy last night? Soft snores came from his body while he lay there completely unaware of your internal panicking.

Tucking in your arms under you to give you a boost up and out of bed, Tommy rolls over and grabs the pillow, suffocating it between his arms and chest. As you stand there with your hand covering your mouth, you wondered just how you got yourself into this mess. Maybe it was the tequila shots, maybe it wasn’t. Who’s to say?

It was in fact, the tequila shots.

How could you have been so careless, having sex with the second good looking guy you laid eyes on the moment you got back home. First, first good looking guy you laid your eyes on.

The bathroom door closes behind you and you press your back against it, mind racing at how to handle this whole situation. Your feet tapped against the cold tile as you paced back and forth.

What were you going to tell Tommy when he woke up thinking you wanted to be something, expecting to be a regular sleeper in your bed?

Your hand covers your mouth in disbelief. What the fuck am I gonna do?

A deep breath enters your lungs as a boost of confidence that you can be straightforward with him about this. I’ve got this. You grab the doorknob and turn it to open the door, head poking out first to find Tommy still snoring away. He didn’t move one bit. Lightly tapping his shoulder, you grew impatient at the efforts going to waste. This wouldn’t be so bad if you didn’t have to go job hunting today, like you promised yourself you would.

With your bunny slippers trampling through the damp grass to Joel’s front door, you adjusted and tightened your robe only about a million times to make sure nothing was showing or sticking out. It was already 9:33 A.M, surely Joel has been awake for hours, right? He’s an older man and they are always up early for who fucking knows what. With your hand switching from beating on the door and ringing the doorbell, someone was bound to answer. The front door flies open to a very grumpy looking Joel, yanking down the rest of his shirt to cover his abdomen.

“Can you please come get your brother from my bed? I need to go job hunting today and he isn’t waking up. It may have something to do with the tequila shots.” You scratched the back of your neck, too embarrassed to look at him.

A scoff leaves his lips and he shakes his head slowly. “Gotta be fuckin’ kidding me. Talk to me all crazy n’ shit last night but now you need my help for your benefit? And for the record, I don’t doubt he’s still sleeping. I fuckin’ heard you two going at it all night after I specifically told you not to keep me up all night. So no, I’m not helping. See ya.” The door was just about closed when you put your hand between it and the door frame to make Joel choose whether or not he wanted to crush your hand.

“Move. Your hand.” His nostrils flared slightly, his eyes shooting daggers into you.

“No. Come get your brother or I’ll make being my neighbor a living hell for you.” No more jokes, no more bullshit was coming from you. If you didn’t find a job soon, you’d just be giving your dad more ammunition to use in the future when he talks about how disappointed he is with you.

Joel’s fingers tapped against the door while he contemplated if he wanted to get roped into this or not. “I swear to fuckin’ god little girl, this better be the first and last time I’m gonna have to do this. Don’t drag him into your shit.” With one swift move he was walking down the porch steps on his way to your bedroom, muttering some bullshit under his breath. When he reaches your room he notices the door slightly shut and he looks to you to tell him to go in. “He’s not..naked…is he?” He whispers to you.

“Not that I’m aware of…but now that you mention it I don't remember honestly.” You whispered back, staring at the ground.

The amount of restraint Joel had to use to not shout at you right then and there for not remembering was astronomical. His calloused palm flies to his forehead and smacks it roughly. “You are a pain in my fuckin’ ass and you haven’t even been here a week!” He whispers louder at you as he shoves the door open and takes a few steps inside. With his hand covering his eyes in case his younger brother's bare ass was out, he stopped where he felt was the middle of your room.

“Tommy, get up. Cmon. Get dressed. Up, let’s go.” His foot reached out until it stopped on the box spring and he nudged it a few times to get Tommy moving. Soon enough Tommy rolled over and took the sheet with him, his black boxers poking out slightly.

“Would you stop, he’s not naked.” You hiss and yank Joel’s hand off his face. A small gasp came from him as he opened his eyes and was met with a still half asleep Tommy.

“Tommy, let’s go man; wake your ass up!” Joel groans and shakes the hell out of his shoulder, obtaining groans from his brother.

He turns his head upwards to look at Joel, eyes slowly blinking open. “Joel? What’re you doin’- wait, did we tag team her like we did that one g-” His words were immediately ceased with Joel’s hand covering Tommy’s lips quickly, loud shushing drowning out his voice. “Get up, we’re leaving so Miss princess can go find a job and be a productive member of society like the rest of us common folk.” Joel bent down and threw whatever clothes were in a pile by his feet at Tommy, hoping and praying he’d get dressed and they can get the hell outta there and Joel can get on with his day.

“This isn’t mine, but I’d love to keep it..” Tommy held up your red thong from the previous night's escapades and your face got feverish to the touch, your hands covering your face to shield you from the embarrassment.

Joel smacks the back of his head and tells him to knock it off. “Hurry up, I’ll be back at the house. He turns to look at you who still had your face covered. With a firm bump of his forearm against yours, you lowered them and sighed.

“For your sake and mine, don’t invite him over again. Next time he’s your problem to deal with.” Surprisingly to you his tone wasn’t harsh for once, more of a sympathetic ring to it this time.

“Ye-yeah I won’t. Thanks again.” Taken aback by his semi sweet piece of advice, you nodded towards the door. “I should let you out so you can get back to your day.” With your hands in your back pockets as you walked him to the front door, you could still hear Tommy stomping around upstairs, trying what sounded like putting on his shoes. You looked at your phone to see if you missed any new texts from your dad, not a single message. You told him you’d be finding a job today but did he care to respond, tell you good luck, anything? No. Why would he? Joel must’ve been able to tell something was wrong because his frame softened along with his face, brows unfurrowed.

“You uh..you okay?” He asked, cocking his head to the side just a tad to see your face while you looked at your phone.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Thanks.” you coldly answer, pushing the front screen door open for him. He wanted to press the situation further but stopped himself. It was no secret you were bothered by something but he couldn't guess what it was. “I’m going to your dads here in a bit to talk about where he wants this fuckin’ pool for Janet.” His brown eyes rolled slightly as he let out a breathy chuckle. With his hand pressed against the screen door to prop it open and walk out to the porch, Joel stops and stands still for a moment before turning back around to look at you.

“You sure nothin’ is wron-”

He was cut off by Tommy marching down your stairs to the front door, stopping in front of you. “You, little lady. No more tequila shots for me, ever again.” He laughs, his gorgeous smile playing to his lips. Your stomach started to turn and have a funny feeling inside. Maybe it was the fact you really weren’t all that interested in Tommy. Yeah you banged him last night, but before that happened you two sat up for hours and talked while pouring sloppy shots of more tequila. He told you about him and how he worked so closely with Joel, his beautiful niece Sarah and how she was like the daughter he never had.

“So maybe I’ll see you later?” The eagerness in his voice was so prominent it hurt that much more. “Uhh..maybe. We’ll talk soon, promise.”

You kiss his cheek and send him and Joel on their way back across the grass to Joel’s house.

Frustration and confusion course through your veins while you press your back against the front door, trying to make sense of what’s happened within the last 48 hours. It was almost 10:30 when you realized you should probably wash yourself before you go out all afternoon.

With just enough time to spare to smoke a cigarette to calm your nerves before leaving the house, you look over to Joel’s driveway and see his truck is gone. He was probably at your dads house by now, telling him all about this morning and how you’re the worst neighbor already. Who cares what your dad has to say to that though, you’re a grown ass adult and you can do what you want.

You smooth your hair down one last time in the reflection of the window before you flick the half smoked cigarette and blow the smoke from your mouth. Reaching into your purse you pull out the squashed packet of gum that was half gone. The sweet notes of mint dance to your nose as you unwrap the piece and toss it in your mouth, discarding the paper back into the package. Still no message from your dad the last time you checked. You probably should’ve never messaged him about it, he was never going to care like he pretends. Getting in your car and cranking the air and still painfully getting used to the heat once again, you put on your music and begin driving around all over town to find a decent job somewhere in this hellhole.

With the afternoon sun slowly going down, you huffed as you sunk back into your car after being denied from the seventh business to get a job. You could feel your luck fading with every declining response, the fear of being more of a disappointment creeping up on you like a scary shadow in the dark. The warm steering wheel held your head as you leaned forward to take a breath.

Back at your dad’s house, Joel’s putting his things away back in his little tool bag he carries in his truck for shit like this. He hates being unprepared, it’s not a good look for himself.

“So have you talked to your daughter recently?” Joel casually brings up as he puts away his tape measure.

“Yeah, she texted me earlier this morning about finding a job but I don’t know about all that. She’s not what these people are lookin’ for. She’s always late and she flakes, she can never amount to anything and she doesn’t put her mind to it. She quits when the going gets tough, s’why she ran away from here all those years ago to follow her mother across the country. Told her it was a stupid idea and she’d regret it and now look where she’s at. Back here in Texas with me.” Your dad laughs like anything he just said was remotely funny. Joel stopped putting tools away the moment your dad started to talk shit about his own flesh and blood, the only one of his kids that continues to acknowledge his existence. Even though Joel was still very pissed about last night and this morning, he didn’t think it was right for your dad to be talking about you like that, especially to him, a complete stranger to you.

He had to bite the inside of his cheek as he thought long and hard about what to say next.

“But you did respond and tell her good luck or somethin’ right? Sure she’s nervous and it sounds like she wants to get it right this time.” He looks over at your dad who was watching the birds fly away from the trees, his red polarized sunglasses he got from the gas station years ago shielding his eyes from Joel’s.

“No, I didn’t. She’ll be fine. Can’t hold her hand forever Joel. Plus I don’t know if they’d want her to work for them. They all heard the same thing I told you, can’t help that I know everyone in town and they wanna know my life.” He laughs again and Joel can feel his jaw clench together.

“Alan, man cmon that’s messed up. You just said you can’t hold her hand forever but you aren’t helping her grow up either by doin’ that.”

Your dad just waves Joel off and chuckles, turning to look at him, “She’ll be fine.” Something told Joel you wouldn’t be though.

On your drive home you skipped going back to your cozy hideaway and opted for the bar from last night, just having a taste for a beer. A single beer, no more tequila shots…for now. You sit down on the stool and turn yourself until you’re facing the bartender who just happened to be Michelle. There was a gnawing feeling at you, like you needed to apologize for putting Joel in a funk last night.

“What can I getcha sweeth-” Her words silenced when she was face to face with you. Giving her a small wave, you took a deep breath, trying not to mix up your words. “I think we got off on the wrong foot and I’d really like to start over. I didn’t mean to step on your toes last night about your bar. I think it’s cute and for the record, Joel isn’t watching over me, he’s my dads best friend and yes we’re neighbors but I don’t want to fuck him and he doesn’t want to fuck me- he actually can’t even stand to be around me and that’s mutual so I-”

“Okay, enough- stop it!” Michelle raises her voice and looks at you closely.

“What do you care if I like you or not darlin’?”

Your fingers comb your hair back and fall to the bar top, smoothing over an imperfection you managed to find. “I don’t want bad blood with anyone, that’s all. I’m already having a tough time finding a job and my dad- I’m sorry. I don’t mean to dump my problems onto you. I just don’t want the list of people wishing to see me fall on my ass grow. She was pouring you a diet coke and tossed a little straw in it, setting it down in front of you before leaning on her hands that were on the curve of the bar top.

“You said you needed a job?” The fizzy drink rolls down your throat and you nod fast. You can see she’s thinking of something in her head, the way she's biting at her fingernail slightly and her eyes are scanning back and forth.

“Come back tonight for training and wear something sexy but nothing too crazy..it’s a bar not a porno.” Michelle raises an eyebrow at you and walks to the back with empty bottles, leaving you sitting in the stool alone and your half drank coke dripping with condensation. With your lips fishing for the straw, you sucked the rest of the liquid down and left a ten dollar bill under the cup and immediately got into your car to drive home.

As you pull up to your house, you notice Joel’s truck is still gone, and no Sarah in sight. Wonder where she is…

Almost all of your clothes were tossed onto the floor while you tried to piece together a cute outfit. You landed on a black pleather halter top with laces in the front and black skin tight pleather pants. The black cowgirl boots your mom got you as a joke were finally making their way out of the box and onto some concrete. As you curled your hair and put it in a messy Pam Anderson inspired bun, you felt sexier than ever in weeks, maybe months. Bartending was all new to you but you’d like to think you learned new stuff quickly. With all of your touchup makeup packed away and about ten sprays of body spray, you were ready.

The gravel in Joel’s driveway crunched under his tires and he put it in park. You peaked from the bathroom window so he wouldn’t see you, it looked like he was on the phone.

Your chunky boot heels thump against the stairs and off you were out the door, ready to go to the first job you’ve been scared of doing. You cover your eyes from the warm setting sun and look at Joel through his truck window. He sighed and got out, immediately growing and looking away. “Where in the hell are you going? You better not be goin’ to Tommy’s I swe-”

“Uuugh nooo I’m not and if I was, who are you to stop me?” You fire back, your purse dangling slightly.

“Hey! I’m just trying- you know what? Forget it. How did the um..job hunting go?” Still not looking directly at you but in your direction, you told him how shitty it was. “Well um ya see..”

“But it’s totally okay because I stopped at Michelle's bar on the way home and she offered me a job. That’s where I’m going right now actually!” The excitement dripping from your words was like nails on a chalkboard to him considering how wide his eyes got.

“You’ve got to be fuckin’ jokin’. You can’t seriously be working there?” He rubs his eyes out of frustration and groans loudly. Your smile slowly faded and you could feel the fiery ball of anger growing inside you.

“What is the fucking issue?”

“Do you have to be everywhere in my life every damn time I turn around, Jesus christ! I mean, the first night you’re here you’re dumped on me and then you bang my brother, insult my girl’s bar and then turn around and work there? What goes through your fucking head sometimes?”

He puts his hand on his hips and stares at you, waiting for some sort of answer. You meet him halfway in the grass right on the property line and raise your hand to smack him for talking to you like that when he catches your wrist in midair, shoving it back down to your side.

“Fuck you! I didn’t ask for him to dump me on you! Newsflash, you’re friends with a dickhead! Michelle was the one who hired me and last time I checked it’s her bar, old man. Not yours. See you fucking never, asshole.” Just when you felt a sliver of hope of maybe ever mending this weird thing with Joel, he shoves his foot in his mouth and misspeaks, taking you right back to square one of not liking him.

#joel miller smut #joel miller x reader #pedro pascal #joel miller #joel miller x you #the last of us #joel miller angst #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller fic #daddy joel #dbf!joel #dbf! joel miller #dbf joel miller x f reader #joel the last of us #pedro pascal joel miller #code red #chaotic mystery

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deathmetalunicorn1 · 4 months

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omg hiiii love, happy new year <33 🫶🎉

it's so fun reading about the protective fatherly and motherly figures scolding the reader for either reckless reasons or just them overreacting. but what if we… ahem… uno reverse card the situation? so it’s teen reader staying up late and scolding them for their unpunctuality when the gods or humans come home later than expected, ands teen gives them long talks and speeches when they mess up, or don’t answer their phone calls.

let’s not forget the typical “I am not mad, just disappointed” with the gods sitting with shame on the couch while the teen huffs like a tired parent, because a teenager berating people who are hundreds, thousands and billion times their age is so hilarious imo 😭🤣

-When presented with a chance like this- of course you were going to take it!

-Your family told you that they would be home by ten, all of them going to an adult only restaurant, but they promised to bring you a slice of cake which cheered you up, as you had comically pouted when they told you where they were going, “I didn’t want to go anyway!” which made most of them laugh.

-Here it was, almost midnight, when they finally came home, several of them smelling like booze, as they had enjoyed their night out.

-You flipped on the light of the living room, “And just where have you all been? Do you know what time it is?!”

-Several were quickly grinning, as some have had this exact conversation with you a few times when you stayed out a little bit later than you were supposed to.

-Qin Shi Haung, deciding to play the role of the naughty teenager, along with Loki, quickly tried to come up with an excuse, “This isn’t what it looks like Y/N!”

-A few like Odin and Leonidas rolled their eyes, exasperated at the antics as you pointed at the clock, “You told me ten! It’s almost two hours later! What do you all have to say for yourself?!”

-Loki kneeled before you, trying not to laugh, “We didn’t mean to Y/N! We were just having so much fun!”

-You sighed deeply, turning your face from him, “I’m not mad- just disappointed~” he quickly broke and started roaring with laughter and you quickly fell into laughter as well and soon, most of the room was laughing loudly, seeing how comical it was to have the roles reversed.

-You cheered as Poseidon held up a slice of cake for you, wrapping in a to go container in a bag, thanking him before he held it away from you, “It’s too late for sweets- go to bed.”

-You were quickly whining, hugging him, still trying to grab at the bag, “It’s not my fault it’s late~~ you guys are the ones who are late!!”

-He couldn’t help but grin down at you, amused to see you whining, “Go to bed, you can have it for breakfast.” Your eyes felt like they had stars in them, “Really?! Night everyone!” before you ran upstairs as more laughter filled the room as Hades scolded Poseidon, “Y/N does not need to have cake for breakfast.”

-Poseidon didn’t really care, “Y/N’s young only once- something like this once in a while is okay.” Hades sighed deeply, agreeing with him as they all headed back to their own rooms to clean up and to sleep off their hangover, whoever had one.

#record of ragnarok #ror x reader #ror poseidon #ror loki #ror qin shi huang #ror odin #ror leonidas

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midnightmayhem13 · 8 months

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Hi lovely! Could I request giving the marvel ladies the silent treatment plsss <33

I just want it back the way it was before

i feel like being sad girl today😔 so you guys are gonna do it with me🩶❕ thank you lovely anon

carol danvers

first carol thinks you're playing a joke on her. but when she tells you you're favorite joke or pickup line, and you don't giggle the way you usually, carol literally has a panic attack. she freaks out and thinks if everything she might've done to puss you off. she'll then forget about it and just try to apologize. she'll buy you flowers and set up a date. if you still ignore her gesture she'll literally get on her knees and start freaking out, begging you to forgive her. when you do she'll hold you close and plead you to talk to her next time.

sharon carter

first of all she gets a little pissy herself. cmon you two are adults and capable of talking it out. but then she'll realize, you love her to pieces, you're the sweetest person ever, she definitely did something. she'd leave you alone for a little, let you cool down. then she'd want to talk about it. "what's going on baby?" and she'll sit there and wait until you're ready to confess. and if you're not she'll reassure it's okay and apologize for anything she might've done. she'll wait until you're ready.

darcy lewis

when the love of her life gives her the silent treatment, darcy definitely has a breakdown. she'll start spiraling and wondering if you're gonna end things. she'll blame herself, even if it's not her fault and you're just going through things. her smile would fade so fast when she realized what was happening. she'll be asking so many, which you do not respond you, and will freak out when you just walk away. when you're asleep that night, she stroke her hair and silently beg for you to forgive her. if it takes a while she'll back off and might get a little mad. but ultimately she'll be so relieved when you speak to her again. you two both apologize and yk make up;)

nevula

nebula will be confused asf. she'll ask if you have been silenced by some sort of spell or something. when you don't respond she'll leave you alone. then when she tries to talk to you again and you don't respond, she'll try to ply the answer out of you. you have to speak to her again at some point. when that doesn't work, she resorts to her expertise. she'll corner you and ask you why you aren't speaking to her, she might get mad but wouldn't hurt you out of her anger. if you say it's bc of something she did she'll apologize and hold you close. "i am sorry my love".

maria hill

first maria will chuckle. "what's going on babe?" then when you turn and walk away she'll get confused. okay? she'll follow you and watch you from afar. watching you live you're life in silence. she'll ask a simple question of what happened. when you don't respond she'll get more specific asking if something happened on a mission or if someone said something. when you stay silent she'll come close and force you in a hug. you don't push, but don't say anything. she'll hold you close and try to sooth any anger or sadness she may have caused. "was it me baby?" if you don't respond she'll leave it alone and just hold you. if you nod she'll nod back and promise to do better and make it up.

kate bishop

when you walk away and ignore kate when she says something to you she'll go wide eyed and give you a suprised puppy look. she'll scramble to get to you. she'll grab you by the shoulder and stare into youre eyes. questioning what she did, it doesn't come out smoothly, she stutters it out. she definitely follows you like a desperate dog begging you to explain. was it her? "princess did i do something?" then she'll give you a moment. but she won't leave youre side. you could sit for hours ignoring her presence but she wouldn't leave you for a second, not until you talk it out.

#carol danvers x reader #sharon carter x reader #darcy lewis x reader #nebula x reader #maria hill x reader #kate bishop x reader #marvel x reader #marvel imagine #wlw

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lolamarlowe65 · 1 year

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just spent 10 minutes blasting cola (cause lana gets it) and imagining the lotus position with james…

OH FUCK anon you just gave me an idea

James Hetfield x reader

“𝓐𝓵𝓵 𝓱𝓮 𝔀𝓪𝓷𝓽𝓼 𝓽𝓸 𝓭𝓸 𝓲𝓼 𝓹𝓪𝓻𝓽𝔂 𝔀𝓲𝓽𝓱 𝓱𝓲𝓼 𝓹𝓻𝓮𝓽𝓽𝔂 𝓫𝓪𝓫𝔂.”

“It’s not just two horny humans anymore, it’s two hearts.”

one shot x reader

disclaimers : age gap (modern day james), smut, fluff, unprotected sex, cursing, smoking, for my romantic (but horny) james lovers, kids go back to ur parents <33

4.3k words

AO3 link

༄♡. 𖧹⋆✰

It’s a late Saturday night and my friend asked me to join him at the bar he sent me the address of. I don’t know this town very well. To be honest, I just came here because of him. I needed an excuse to move out from my old town and see something new and this guy I was talking with seemed like a good exit door. Truth is, this man is not as nice and good as he seemed. I’m the typical case of a woman manipulated and lied to just for sex. And even, I used him too in a way so if the sex is good what’s so wrong? But even this is bad. He only thinks for himself and himself only, not caring if I finish nor if I like it. He calls me, we hook up, he comes and then leaves telling me he’ll take me on a nice date next time. It never happened, and it will never do. I don’t even want to. I don’t even know if I want to stay here. So what am I doing here still running after him to be treated like shit? Here’s the answer, I just don’t have anything better to do. I don’t know anybody and I’ve got no idea how the people in this city are. So I go to every single one of his so-called “dates” waiting for a new day to start. When I find something better to do I promise that it will be passionate and most importantly; fulfilling. Fuck.

Standing in front of the bar I light myself a cigarette waiting for him. We usually have a drink and then go straight to it. Saying I’d need a drink to be able to hook up with him would almost sound like unconscious rape so I will not say that, I consent to this bullshit. But I definitely need something to drink to be able to listen to him and his tremendous fucking ego.

While I’m waiting I see this group of guys enter the bar. They look older than me, around their 50s maybe even if they definitely look younger than that. There’s four of them, one of them has long black hair nicely put back in a braid, another one has grey hair and wears a hat. To be honest, I just heard the third guy call him a “dumbass” so that’s how I’d describe him. This third guy has a very beautiful face, I must admit, with long curly salt and pepper hair. But this is nothing compared to the fourth guy. I think I have never seen a man that attractive, he’s quite tall and he’s got short white hair. He wears a black shirt that exposes his heavily tattooed arms. My fucking god he is hot. I can’t see clearly because it’s nighttime but I’m pretty sure he’s got ocean blue eyes. Which would be the cherry on the cake for my heart. I feel like I know them from somewhere but that might just be me. They’re all laughing and joking around and the fourth guy I was talking about notices me and says hello with a smile from afar. He must have noticed me creeping over them, shit. At least his smile is beautiful. I say hello back and leave them to enter the bar.

I can’t believe it! While I was lost watching over those guys I didn’t notice this fucking asshole was 30 minutes late! Fuck it! I’ve had enough! I call him twice before getting him over the phone.

*”- Yeah baby I’m sorry I’m late.” he says in an unbothered voice. “I had something more urgent to do.” he adds.

“- Something? That’s what I am? Something? You fucking asshole! Could you at least have the fucking decency to tell me you will not come?” i answer, obviously pissed.

“- Hehe sorry!” he laughs slightly. “It’s okay, you agreed it was nothing serious between us so just go home and next time I’ll take you on a nice date.” he dares to say.

“- What the fuck? You think I want to see you again? Get fucked!” i yell.

“- Do whatever you want, it's not gonna change my life much, you’re too frigid for me anyway.”

“- Too frigid?? Maybe if you knew how to use your dick properly instead of shaking it around in my pussy to come after 30 seconds I would be more expressive! What the fuck do you know anyway? You probably don’t know what pleasure on a woman looks like since you’ve never been able to give it to them!”

“- Bit-” i hang up before he can say anything else.*

I also block his number, he already sent me a few messages. What the fuck? I know I was not thinking too much about this but I won’t accept to be treated like property. I don’t want to waste this time I spent alone outside so I decide to go inside for a drink before going back to the shitty place I’m renting. That’s decided, fuck this town, I don’t wanna stay here. I’ll go fool around the west coast or lose myself in some mountains. I’m an artist, I don’t have money so I’ll see what I can do.

Sitting at the bar drinking my vodka I notice the guys from earlier in the booth on the corner. The light is still pretty dark so I can’t seem to really catch their expressions. Whatever man. My time at the bar is just me looking at those guys while talking to the waitress who’s also been with a lot of assholes that just wanted to play with her. Her name is Hailey, we got along so well she gave me her number. I don’t wanna get drunk so I just sip my drink slowly to retard the moment I’ll have to go.

“- Hey girl, stop looking over they must have enough!” Hailey commands with a laugh.

“- What do you mean? Can’t even see them well from here.” i answer, taking a sip of my drink.

“- They’re the guys from Metallica! They had some shooting for a video to do around here that’s why they’re here. I can’t believe they’d choose to come to this bar out of all the ones in town. I must admit that they’re actually pretty normal humans!” she explains.

“- What did you think, they were aliens?” i say, completely unbothered.

“- When your band is that orgasmic, yes. Like I’d love to meet a human man that could make me feel like they do.” she laughs.

“- I’ll drink to that!” i say taking another sip of my drink.

“- You look completely out of this? You not into metal?”

“- Oh.. I very much am. It’s just… I don’t even know what to think anymore with all that happened tonight. And I mean.. It’s cool that they’re here and all but what do you want me to do. It’s not like I’m gonna become their best friend. Here they’re just four guys sharing a drink after work.” i chuckle.

“- I guess you’re right.” Hailey tilts her head.

Hailey takes the tray and goes in the back of the bar to serve some drinks. I’m left alone for some time trying to think about what’s next for me to come. I can’t believe I didn’t recognize Metallica before, I guess I can’t see very well in the dark. So the first one was Rob I think, then the “dumbass” was Lars, the fourth with the beautiful face Kirk and of course James. The tall tattooed one with the black shirt, no wonder I thought he was hot. I always thought so. Whatever era of his, I think he’s my ideal type. If you saw the guy I was supposed to meet with tonight you’d laugh at me for lowering my standards so much. But listen. A girl like me could never get a guy like him. Plus, to him I’m surely a young chick who doesn’t know what she wants. It’s wrong though, I know what I want. Something deep and passionate with somebody that’s not afraid of telling me they care about me. Something adult. It’s 2023 and I can’t believe guys like this asshole I was supposed to hook up with still exist. Okay if you want casual sex but be honest about it and get sex education for Christ’s sake. Now I want a man like James. At least a man that’s like how I would imagine him to be. I laugh by myself thinking about how dumb I am to think about this.

“- What’s so funny?” a deep voice asks me.

I almost choke at the surprise. Here he is, sitting next to me. James fucking Hetfield. I also see the other guys leaving the bar saying bye to me and James with a wave of hand. I turn my head to look at James clearly saying it all with my face. What the fuck is going on.

“- Nothing.” i cough. “Just silly thoughts.” i smile.

He is so beautiful. His face in the light is even more satisfying to look at.

“- Seems interesting.” he answers playfully.

I chuckle slightly. But I can’t wrap my head around why he would talk to me. I should be the one here all “stars in my eyes” asking him how he’s doing. Wait? Is he flirting with me? I turn my head to look at him in the eyes and go straight to the point.

“- James? What exactly do you want?” i ask, trying my best to stay composed.

“- I don’t know.” he holds my gaze. “What do you think I want?” he smiles.

“- A bouncy young chick you’ll never see again to blow you tonight?” i sarcastically answer. “If you want just that from me you can get fucked.” i continue.

I had my quota of assholes for the night and I don’t want to have the beautiful image I have of James to get broken too. Now that would really piss me off. I deeply hope it’s not the case. That he does want to fuck me but also to care about me. That he wants to be this passionate and deep relation I was thinking about. Or at least hear he wants to fuck me good and well and respect me. Just that. Just this would turn me on. Just this I would be willing to risk. I can hear James laugh at my raw words. At least he isn’t the type of guy to get his ego crushed because I talked coldly to him.

“- Not at all.” he stands up and puts himself behind me while approaching my ear. “I mean, I would love to make love to such a beautiful woman but certainly not use her and leave. I see things in a deeper way.” he whispers.

My eyes got bigger instantly. That’s all I needed to hear. I look into my pockets for the dollars I need to pay for my drink. I put them on the bar and stand up, taking James’s hand and dragging him out of the bar. His hand feels so good I can’t even explain the feeling. It’s rough but soft and the way he presses my hand into his to be sure he is not mistaking my gesture turns me on even more. It’s not just lust. There’s something so romantic about this.

Once outside the bar I stop, realising I don’t know where the fuck I’m going.

“- Where’s your hotel?” i ask, pressed.

“- Just at the end of the street.” he answers.

“- Kay, let’s go.”

I start walking confidently but James stops me and makes me look at him.

“- Are you sure about this?” James asks.

How thoughtful. I mean, it’s the bare minimum but I’ve never been asked that before. The guys I have been with didn’t give a shit. They could fuck and so they did without asking me if I was completely okay with it.

“- And you? Are you?” i answer.

“- More than anything.” he cups my face with hands.

He’s taller than me by a good head but I don’t feel threatened by his height. His hands feel so good and his eyes give me so much admiration, I just can’t resist.

“- James…” i almost whisper.

“- Tell me your name so I can beg for you. Because this doesn’t seem real.”

“- Y/n…”

“- So fucking beautiful.” he lets out. “Prove me it’s me real and I’m not just dreaming that the hottest chick in this town wants to go back to my room with me.”

I know what to do. I slowly put my hand on the back of his neck to pull him to me and just like that I kiss him. His lips are so soft and hot, I never felt such a thing while kissing somebody. It’s so overwhelming that my heart starts beating at an unhealthy beat. But also, it’s so peaceful, it’s exactly what I want to feel for the rest of my life.

I let my lips go from him and look at him, studying the blue of his eyes. Something changed. It’s not just two horny humans anymore, it’s two hearts.

“- Shit.” i hear James say.

He takes my hand back and this time, he is the one leading the way, being careful with every step I take for me not to be lost. I don’t know what he’s thinking and that makes me feel a mix of excitement and fear.

When we arrive in front of his hotel my heart starts to pound again. What is about to happen? Is he really in for it? If I mistook what he wanted from me I could at least say that I fucked Metallica’s singer. At least. That’s what I repeat myself. But the other part of my brain tells me to let go and see what’s gonna happen without any questions.

Waiting for the elevator to come he holds my hand tightly, like I am about to disappear into space.

The elevator comes and I am left here with him, just the two of us standing next to each other. The hotel is very big, so the elevator takes time and every minute feels longer than the other. Because I can’t touch him, because I can’t feel him. This highway to whatever is going to happen is the longest road I’ve ever had to take. But the best one yet.

As a way of waiting, I let my head rest on his arm next to me. His beautiful tattooed arm. But before I could really settle my head here James turns me around to kiss me.

“- I’m sorry, I can’t wait.” James almost whispers.

I moan into his mouth as a way to give my approval and he grabs me by the back of my thighs and wraps my legs around his waist, my arms going straight to hold the back of his neck. His lips derive from my lips to fall into my neck, biting the skin he leaves trails of kisses on. Fuck I didn’t knew I was that sensitive here. I need his lips on mine, I need his tongue to play with mine so I turn his head around with one of my hands, my lips practically begging at this point. As I deepen the kiss, I let his tongue enter my mouth and play with mine. God, it’s like he’s trying to look for all the places that make me feel good.

“- Wait wait James!” i exclaim.

“- What?” he answers, kissing my neck.

“- There’s cameras in elevators? Right?” i ask, afraid we might have been seen.

“- I couldn’t give less of a shit baby.” he responds immediately, letting a laugh out of me. “They can see a beautiful woman they’ll never have if they want.”

“A beautiful woman they’ll never have” what does he mean by that? What do you mean never have? I have no more time to be lost in my thoughts because the elevator just opened. James carries me through the hallway in the same position as we were in, my legs wrapped around his waist and my arms around his neck. One of his hands is on my ass, which makes me weaker than I would admit and the other is around my waist. I’m so glad that it’s late, nobody is walking around the hotel. I can also feel the hardness in his pants, teasing me just enough for me to get wet. I know what is gonna happen now, he’s gonna fuck me, and he’s gonna do it good. I’ve been waiting for this. And I can’t believe that none other than James Hetfield will do it. I’m so horny just thinking of it.

Opening his hotel room door he wastes no time to close the door and he drops me on the bed. Towering over me, he goes back to where he was before, kissing me, my neck and now the birth of my breasts. I push James's head slightly to have room to remove my shirt, which, when he understands my attention, does for me. My bra goes away at the same time as my shirt and here I am, topless, in front of a man that makes me feel so confused about my feelings.

“- Perfect. So perfect.” i hear him groan.

I moan at the touch of his soft lips sucking on my nipples. He bites them and sucks on them like he found a new instrument to play. I could come just because of this, this new feeling is incredible.

“- I want to make you feel so good.” James tells me, smiling.

I freeze and moan at his desire. Nobody has cared enough for me to do that. To want that. To care about my pleasure. James’s voice is so low and rough that it almost vibrates through my body, sending shivers to my heart and pussy. There’s nothing I can do. I want him. Whatever if he throws me out of his room after, I want him.

“- Can I?” he asks, his hands on the border of my pants.

“- Yes, but remove this before.” i answer, grabbing the end of his shirt.

He gets the message and lets me remove his shirt from him. What a beautiful sight. His body can tower over me easily, with his muscular back and broad shoulders. His tattoos I think are the best thing about this. It makes him look even more like a piece of art, and it contrasts his fit chest and stomach in the most beautiful way there is. He smiles at the way I look at his body. This smile, his tremendously beautiful smile.

James slides down on his knees right in front of the bed. He grabs my foot and removes my shoe, and does the same for the other. He then removes my pants to leave me only with my panties, my pussy throbbing at his gaze.

“- Even your legs are perfect. How have I not found you before?” he says, slowly kissing my legs.

I can’t think straight with James lips now kissing the interior of my thighs, getting dangerously close to my pussy at every one of his pecks. I slid my hand in his hair, avid for his touch.

“- James, please.” i beg.

“- Don’t beg darling. What you want I shall do. Tell me. What do you want?” James answers, languidly.

Breathing hard and shortly, I try to gather my words. I can’t believe this is happening.

“- Mmh…” i moan, trying to remove my underwear. “I want your lips…” i breath heavily. “Right here.” i finally say, resting my hand on my pussy.

James eyes glimmer as his gaze is fixed on mine. He doesn’t say anything but grunts in approval and removes my hands away from my panties, removing them by himself, leaving me fully exposed to him. His head dives instantly in between my legs like he’s been starving for it. Oh my god! That’s good! My hand in his hair, I keep him in between my legs, not wanting it to stop.

“- What a pretty cunt… what a pretty sight.” he whispers, latching on my clitoris.

This is the first time somebody eats me out. This is the first time I am feeling this and yet I know he’s better at it than average. His tongue alternates between my clitoris and my slit and my legs start to shake. But here’s the thing. I don’t want to come right now. I want to come with him. While he’s in me.

“- Ja..James!” i exclaim, lifting his head up with my hands. “I want you.”

James puts himself on his knees and kisses my lips softly. So desperate for him I open his belt and pants. James puts his fingers under my chin and locks his gaze into mine.

“- Look at you. So desperate for my cock. I’m such an asshole making you beg for me. I should be the one doing that. I should be the one begging for you to even deserve the desire you have for such an old man.” he says.

He finishes removing his pants and underwear and only now I realise how big he is. I have never had something like that. His cock is thick and big with a vein poking along the shaft. It looks more than ready to be in me. And this makes me even more horny.

I raise myself on my knees too and put my hands on both sides of his face.

“- I think I’ve got a taste for men who are older. Or maybe just for you. Because no man has ever made me feel what you make me feel. Just in an hour, you’ve made me more fulfilled than I have ever been.” i admit, kissing him.

Sitting on the mattress, James grabs the back of my thighs so I can sit on him and wrap my legs around him. I wrap my arms around his neck, again. This position we’re in, the lotus, is so intimate, like something you would do with your partner, not an unknown chick you’ve met an hour ago. My tits press against his chest and both our hearts beat at the same pace. His cock is teasing my entrance and his gaze is locked in mine.

“- I should find those boys and teach them a lesson. How dare they have the audacity not to make you feel fulfilled.” he kisses my neck. “This will never happen again as long as you’re with me.” he adds, his head buried in my neck.

Did he just ask me to stay with him? Did he just say that he wanted to be with me? I can’t even think about it more as I feel his cock entering me. It’s stretching me out. And it feels so good.

“- Fuck, this is so big!” i bite my lower lip.

I moan and he starts to move into me slowly, he’s so deep and I can barely hold it together.

“- That’s it babygirl, you’re doing good.” he tells me, removing the hair out of my face.

The way he talks to me makes me crazy. The way he holds me makes me weak. The way he looks at me makes me feel alive. This is what I meant when I said I wanted something passionate and deep. Talking about deep, the connection we have as his cock moves in and out of me is incredible. You can probably see the stars in my eyes. And I can see the fire in his.

“- Mhhh… James! AAahh!” i scream, feeling numb.

“- Oh y/n. Mmmh…” he grunts. “You are so beautiful bouncing on my cock like this.”

“- Stop… mmmh… stop telling me those things…” i let out in between whimpers. “Or I’ll be sad… mmh… when I have to go.” i add, hearing him groan as an answer.

I feel my release coming. I’ve never felt that good. The only times I have come before were when I was touching myself, it’s the first time a man will do it. And what a man. I will be sad when I have to go, I wish I could have sex with him everyday, I wish I could kiss him every minute. It might sound cliché to feel such things towards a man like him in such a short time. I said he’d fuck me and fuck me good. But he’s making love to me.

I see his face flinch and he kisses me.

“- I can feel you tighten around my cock...mmmh..” he says. “Come. Come for me baby.”

I can also feel his cock twitch in me. I know he’s about to come too.

“- James… mmmhh… please! Come in me! Please! Aaahh!” i tighten my arms around his neck, throwing my head into his neck, coming as i implore.

“- Fuck… you are so amazing.” he says, out of breath, coming deep into me, letting little whimpers out of me.

I can hear his heartbeat through his chest as his cock softens into me. This feeling is so peaceful and makes me forget about what is to come next. It makes me feel so important and cared for. It’s two hearts. And I don’t wanna leave. He’s making me crazy. Here, in his arms, in this position, I don’t want this to end.

“- Y/n.” he calls. “Stay with me.” he demands, his hands falling on my waist. “Stay with me. I’ll take you anywhere you want, give you everything you want. I know it’s selfish to ask you to leave everything so I can be with you but I need you. I don’t know how, I don’t know why. But I do.” he begs.

“- Oh James. I fucking hate this town. Take me anywhere you want.” i answer.

I was the loneliest and most bored woman on earth some hours ago. Now I’m the happiest and most fulfilled. I think, while James locks his promise with a passionate kiss on my lips.

༄♡. 𖧹⋆✰

A/N : the lotus like man i just want to do that with james it feels so deep! thank you anon because this gave me an idea for this oneshot, i wrote this with of course, cola in my mind because lana does gets it. i usually write stuff with rough sex and all but something more soft from time to time doesn’t hurt, hope you’ll love this anon, and everybody else (james you can take me anywhere) <33

#like james i just want to lotus with you #take me i'm yours #metallica #james hetfield #james hetfield smut #metallica fanfiction #james hetfield fanfiction #metallica smut #james hetfield x reader #lola’s delusions

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tojisun · 9 months

Text

real enough to touch

atwow!jake sully x fem avatar reader

!! angst; there are references to a1; hinted age gap between jake and reader; use of "kid" as platonic pet name // 2.1k words

: based of this prompt; hope you guys would luv it <33; title from blue banisters - lana

you watch as they gather their things, packing up whatever else they could hoist onto their ikrans without the beasts buckling underneath all the weight that they are not used to carrying. the sully’s are silent for a change, their lips pinched close, their eyes refusing to meet each other in an act of full avoidance, hoping that the silence would blanket their breaking hearts.

your hands twitch, muscle memory kicking in when jake stalked away and left the rest of his family for a short moment. neytiri finds your eyes, tipping her head to wherever jake headed and you send her a short nod before turning around to follow the trail that your friend left.

you find him standing before the opening of high camp, alone, his eyes looking far away and his mind lost in thought. not even your loud footfalls could coax him out so you wait, taking your space beside him, basking in the silence as you count down the minutes you have left with him.

“i’m sorry,” he says after a while, his voice thick and only then do you realize that he slipped into english – a pretence of privacy.

“you shouldn’t be,” you tell him, tipping your head up and smiling when you meet his already-waiting eyes. “i get it the most, you know?”

“i know,” he breathes. “i’d love nothin’ more than for you t’come… but the people, they need you more.”

“‘course. they’re still gon’ need the remaining warrior of the jarhead clan, now that y’r leavin’,” you tease, hoping to ease the tension.

he chuckles, shaking his head at your words. your heart stutters at the sound, the realization that this is the last you’ll ever hear from and see of jake has you biting the inside of your cheeks, willing yourself to not cry yet. not when he needs you – strong heart.

he licks his lips, parting them, hesitating, until he finally mutters, “thanks for always being with me: back in hell’s gate ‘till now.”

you roll your eyes at him this time, a huff of short laugh escaping your lips. “i promised, didn’t i?”

(“on me?” he asked, tall and blue and free. he stood beside neytiri, their eyes pleading, waiting, but hardened – if you were going to stand against them, then so be it.

but how could you ever? you would follow him to hell if he asked.

“always, corporal,” you replied, laughing as you shook your head, watching as your answer was rewarded with twin and fanged smiles.

yeah, you thought, i have no regrets.)

but that might have been the wrong thing to say; you watch as jake’s face falls, his body drooping along, making him look older than he is. he reaches out for you, patting your head the way you see him do with his kids – familial. platonic.

your heart bursts at seeing what you are to him. it is love, sure it is not in the way you want, but it is still love. jake’s love.

you shuffle to his side, patting him on the back. “i’m fine, jake.”

“i know y’are,” he says, his hand still resting on your head. “but i want you to live for y’rself, kid. y’ve always been here f’r me and now i want you to be here for y’rself.”

“and what exactly does living for myself mean?” your tone is jovial, light.

“…well, i see the way you are with my kids and i know you’ll be a great mother.”

his words strike you, your mind racing as you stare up at him with wide eyes. no.

“no,” you repeat out loud, chuckles spilling from your lips. “you- no. jake. i, uh, i don’t think i can.”

his brows crease, worry lining his face. “you can’t? why?”

“it’s not like i’ll like anyone else to the point of marriage and mating.” you shrug, hiding your wince with a cough, your tail coiling around your leg as you duck your head away, breaking eye contact.

he holds your arm, quiet, urging you to look at him again. you refuse, hoping he would not insist, not when it’s him.

“anyone else?” jake’s voice pierces through your silence and your lungs burn at hearing him repeat your slip up.

you clench your jaw, biting back anything that can clue him in because jake’s smart. no amount of augustine’s curt dismissal could say otherwise. hell, even spellman had begrudgingly admitted that there’s something good going on in jake’s head. ‘something’ that could easily bite your ass right now.

“oh,” he says.

fuck.

“kid-”

you shrug out of his hold, jake easily letting go of your arm, and you shuffle away, your back turned to him. you rub the back of your neck, chuckling, not minding the fact that you and him could hear just how fake it sounds.

“it’s nothing, jake. don’t. don’t worry about it.” you do not meet his eyes, ashamed of having your feelings unearthed, laid down at his feet for him to see.

he is quiet, unmoving, but you can feel his stare pinning you, tracking the way you shuffle or how you fiddle with your fingers to keep your eyes busy.

you wonder what he thinks, but fear seizes your heart, squeezing, filling you with pinpricks. you are afraid. afraid that if he does give word to what you have always avoided – his rejection, his apologies, his pity – then there’s no turning back. no bridge to salvage. and you would be left with nothing of jake, not even his friendship.

then, amidst your silence, jake finally speaks.

“since when?” he asks. his curiosity is gentle, kind, and you turn to look at him, seeing the beginnings of apologies shadowing his weary eyes.

another dismissal sits on your tongue, ready for you to just move past this because what good would it do to talk about things that could never be?

but-

but how long have you been unkind to yourself? how long have you carried this love? before the war and even now at its return, was it not him who you fought for? was it not jake who gave you the strength to just be?

you feel him step close to you, close but not enough – it would never be enough. you study the contours of his face, every line and every freckle. eywa, he is so beautiful, your heart burns.

“that day before you were gon’ go scouting with augustine and spellman.” the words spill from your lips. “just after you caused so many issues by just running away once your first link was established.”

you laugh, heart easing up when you see jake’s lips tug up in a soft smile at the memory.

“i just finished unlinking from my own when you wheeled towards my open pod, grinning ear to ear, asking how it was. i told you it felt weird, in a good way, and you did this laugh. it was- it came from deep in your belly.” you lick your lips, ignoring the choked up feeling lodged in your throat.

“you were always so detached from everyone, keeping to yourself even on the days we were allowed to let loose and have fun, but it all changed that day. you looked so much happier, lighter. calmer, even. jake, you were – are – so beautiful. and i, well, you know.”

jake’s eyes gloss over like he can see the memory play out before his eyes. “that long?” his voice is vulnerable.

“yeah.”

you take a moment, a quiet breath, then, “it’s always been you, jake.”

tears trickle from the corners of your eyes, spilling onto flushed cheeks. your heart caves as the last of your secrets are laid bare for him to see. the pieces fall from your palms and you know jake could never pick them up for you. you don’t even expect him to.

because this love that you carry is not meant to be reciprocated, you know that at least. not when jake’s heart has finally found its home in the loving arms of neytiri. because while you are in love with jake, you love neytiri just as strongly. and just how you will do anything to make jake happy, you will do just as much to protect neytiri’s joy.

“i’m sorry,” jake whispers, the simple words loaded with so much emotion. you look into his eyes, see the storm raging, and you laugh.

the giggles spill from your lips like your trickling tears – soft, unexpected, and surprising.

jake looks up, astonished and confused at your reaction. you shake your head at him, moving close, reaching to hold his wrists with your smaller hands.

“jake, i know,” you say, smiling up at him. “i’m not hurt or lamenting. i’ve had years to make do, and many more years to realize that us being friends – that’s just as good. i don’t need anything more from you jake. i’m happy as we are.”

jake studies you, his eyes tracking your tears and the soft smile gracing your lips, memorizing the white freckles on your face and the patterns running along your cheeks. he gazes into you, seeing, not for the first time, how much you mean to him and his heart calms. because despite the tears and the heartbreaking confession, jake sees the serenity lining your face, and that is all that he could wish for.

he twists his hands so that he is holding onto yours, your fingers tangled with his. amber eyes gaze at you, heavy with sincere care directed at you. you giggle, a heartbreaking hiccupped sound, as he draws you close and pulls you into an embrace.

the last one, you think to yourself, burrowing your head onto his chest. and then he’ll be gone.

“thank you,” jake murmurs, his voice muted from where it’s pressed onto your forehead. “i- i’m sorry for not noticing. for not realizing, but thank you. thank you for still being with me. for choosing me and the clan. for fighting for us. i wouldn’t have gone far without you so thank you, kid.”

you nod, no longer trusting your voice, your lips wobbling as you stifle a sob. his fingers run along your braids, tickling the base of your ears, before pressing a kiss on the top of your head. then, he is pulling away, his warm embrace leaving you for the cool air to caress.

time has slipped past your fingers, it seems, and now it’s time for him to go.

“take care, jake.” you hold his eyes, willing yourself to be strong in front of him for the last time.

he nods, unable to leave with a pretence of a smile amidst his own teary eyes. but that’s alright. he’s given you enough of his kindness and love to last you a lifetime.

you both return to the edge of the cliff, the clan watching as the sullys prepare to mount their ikrans. neytiri offers you a tight hug, her sobs pressed on the side of your face and you hold her with weak arms, crying as your sister takes her leave.

the children squeeze you as they hug you goodbye. tuk promises to tell you the stories of her journey and you do not tell her that they might not return to the clan anymore, not when jake’s doing this to protect them from the humans, so you nod and tell her that you will wait.

because you will. you will wait for their return. for your friend’s return.

jake meets your eyes once more, raising his hand and waving goodbye, and then they’re all gone.

the clan members return to their tents, quiet and solemn, but you stay at the edge of the cliff, watching as they go smaller and smaller, until they’re engulfed by the colours of the vast sky.

mo’at stands beside you. waiting. silent. then, “come, child. you no longer need to hide.”

your knees buckle as you turn to her, unable to stop yourself from hugging her as you sob, not minding the fact that she is the tsahik as you seek comfort in her embrace. your lungs burn at the weight of your sorrow, and she holds you close, her aged arms holding you up as you weep.

because now, truly, jake is gone. he has left you behind, unable to follow him.

you had been fine not being his beloved as long as he was in your life. but now, you have nothing of him. just memories of him – his ghost.

#suns.f #jake sully x reader #jake sully x you #jake sully x y/n #jake sully x human!reader #jake sully #jake sully angst #atwow jake #atwow angst #avatar the way of water #i truly wanted to gut myself so here it iss #suns

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sivyera · 2 months

Text

stolen bride

avatar 2 neytiri te tskaha mo'at'ite x fem!metkayina!reader

warnings: age gap (neytiri is 33 and you are 19), someone can find this as a slight angst same with part 2 (part 2 is also more from neytiri's pov) but it's not i promise! part 3 is rotten tooth fluff :)

pt. 2 , pt. 3 here

༺☆༻

You, the eldest daughter of Tonowari and Ronal, are currently sitting alongside Neytiri, mother to Neteyam te Suli Tsyeyk'itan, her eldest son. She was suppost to talk with you about yours and Neteyam's marrige, as your future mother-in-law while Tonowari mirrors the familiar connection as he spends time with Neteyam.

"what do you want to talk about?" You asked her calmly while you were looking at her with neutral face.

Neytiri's gaze flicked over to you. Her eyes went from your wet feet, because you were swimming earlier with Kiri, to your hand-made skirt and top which was beautifully decorated with some small shells and corals. She took your whole beauty and after that she locked eyes with you.

''About you and Neteyam. After speaking with your parents about it, we agreed on the proposal. You two will be married.'' Neytiri answered while looking at you.

That took you off guard. You and Neteyam were good friends, he's a great guy and it's fun with him, but that's all. You don't love him nor want to marry him.

''But I don't want to marry him, I don't love him.'' You said still little shocked from this announcement.

Neytiri shifted in her seat, it was clear she hated this conversation but why? It made her feel weird when she just thought about the idea of you marrying her son. It made her feel mix of anger, envy, sadness and fear and it was just too much chaos on her, with Quaritch looking for them.

''But you are both of age now.. Why would you not want to marry him?" She said as she leaned forward you slightly.

You just sighed. You knew that Neteyam is a good guy and a great warrior. He was your good friend but nothing more. It was fun spending time with him but nothing more, no hard feelings.

"I just don't love him, he's a good guy and my good friend but... I cannot feel love towards him so I won't marry him." You answered her question calmly with stoic face.

You knew that your parents wanted to best for both of you but your heart already belong to someone else without them even knowing it. You noticed how her ear flicked when you were answering which made you shift in your seat.

You felt the sunlight getting warmer and warmer on your skin which signalized sunset.

Neytiri studied you for a moment before looking away. She hated this even more then before but she kept a calm demeanor.

"I see.. What is it about Neteyam that is making you not want to marry him? Is it his looks or something else? She asked as he gaze shifted back at you.

It was a real mess inside of her. She wanted you to marry Neteyam and have a beautiful future with him but at the same time she hated the though of you marrying him.

You looked down at your feet before speaking. "No! He's a pretty guy and a good guy like I said but.."

You choked on your own words. You felt a cold chill ran down through your spine. You couldn't say it out loud. It was forbidden. It could ruin everything so you got scared and didn't finish your sentence.

Neytiri's gaze stayed fixed on you as you were looking down at your feet. "But... what?" She asked calmly but you could see right through her calm demeanor.

You swallowed the anxiety that was building inside of you and looked into her eyes. "I-... I love someone else..." You said as you looked up at her, feeling her intense gaze on you which again made you shift in your seat.

This took her off guard. She was prepared for everything like that you want to be free or something like that but this?! This was something she hadn't expected in the slightest.

"Who? Who is that you love?" Neytiri asked while trying to sound calm and soft yet you could hear the hint of anger or sadness in her voice, it was just weird; you couldn't put your finger on it.

Once again you looked at your feet and stayed quiet for extra few minutes. You knew that if you say it out loud; you can never take it back, never. You wanted to keep your mouth shut, yet your body didn't listen. "It's you..." You whispered.

Her eyes widened and her tail flicked as you revealed your love for her. There were so many thoughts forming inside her head, so needed a minute to process what you just said.

Finally, she spoke. "...you love me?" She asked quietly, making sure she heard you correctly while her tail flicked once again.

You knew this was forbidden but you couldn't control your emotions and who you fell in love with. She caught your eyes the first moment her and the other Sully's arrived.

You just nodded as an answer due to the large lump forming in your throat. You knew it was forbidden but you just couldn't help it!

You felt the lump in your throat getting bigger and bigger, same as your anxiety and without even realizing your body moved without thinking.

You stood up then almost ran outside of her marui and jumped in the sea while you quickly called your ilu. And you swam away as far as possible. You swam far, far to your safe place which you found few years ago. No one knew about this place, only you and your ilu, you were safe there and you could sort out your thoughts nicely in peace.

Neytiri on the other hand froze at place while her head was filled with thoughts. When she came out of her trance you were long gone. You didn't even let her answer you but to be honest she didn't know what to say.

All she knew was that this, this marriage was wrong. And that maybe her heart was calling for you just as much as yours were calling for hers...

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pablitogavii · 10 months

Note

Can u do a fic where reader and Aurora are bestfriends and hang out a lot and Aurora teases her brother about how his girlfriend likes her more than him, maybe like, innocent reader

You're my girl, baby!!

Pablo loved your close relationship with his older sister because he knew that when he couldn't spend much time with you, Aurora was always there to keep you company.

Part of him felt blessed that he knew you were safe as long as you're with his sister, but another part started to worry that you might love her more than him.

Obviously those were silly fears, because you love her as a sister and him as a lover but still made him a little jealous of your strong bond.

"Amor, do you want to go to the water with me??" Pablo asked during one of the days you've spent at the boat in Formentera wishing to hold you close and just spend some time with you alone.

"I'm sunbathing with Rora cariño.." you answered and Pablo just shrugged although deep down he hated that you chose her over him again...it felt so annoying to feel like he is competing with his own sister for your attention!

aurorapaezg

Formentera, Spain

a brunette to my blond! te amo!! <33 tagged: y.n.bebe

comments:

y.n.bebe: te amo hermanaaa! <33

aurorafanclub: THIS bond!!!! Queens!!

gavirafamfanclub: love to see them together!!

mario_rzs: cheers to the best photographer!!

aurorapaezg: forever thankful to you JAJA

y.n.bebe: not to mention this was the very first try!!

barcawaggzz: she loves rora more than pablo JAJAJA

Obviously that comment was a joke and it was clear to Pablo but he still felt his jaw clench when he read it knowing that deep down he did feel jealous.

During the evening, Pablo didn't join the rest outside like usual where they would make some grill and listen to music while hanging out by the pool. You noticed that he was missing, going to check up on him in your shared bedroom.

There he was laying on the bed on his phone looking absolutely fine.

"Everyone is wondering where you are at cariño..why don't you join us?" you ask but he just shrugged his shoulder looking very disinterested about your request.

"Did your get sunburned today at the boat??" you ask wondering if that's maybe why he was moody and exhausted but it was clear that wasn't the case..something was definitely bothering him tho.

"Pablo, que pasa? Why don't you talk to me about it??" you sat down besides him and he put his phone away about to open up when he heard his sister calling your name groaning in annoyance and grabbing his phone again. "I promised to tell her if I like the dress she got recently..I'll be right back cariño" you said walking out of the room for a few moments but Pablo was no longer in the mood to talk so he just laid down and closed his eyes pretending to sleep when you returned

A few days after we got back to Sevilla, Pablo's mood have changed a little but he still seemed gloomy whenever his sister would spend time at home with the two of you.

The moment she comes, she just snatches you away and Pablo is left observing you from afar laughing and enjoying time with his sister instead of him. He was starting to grow frustrated from jealousy! You were his girl!!

"Can you move?" Pablo said but in more rude way that he should of making Aurora give him an 'are you serious rn face!?' to which he didn't respond.

"I want to sit next to my girlfriend if you don't mind!" he repeated again with the very rude tone and you were looking at him in surprise. Why was he being so cold and mean all of the sudden towards his sister??

"What if I do mind!?" Aurora smirked wanting to tease her younger brother but he was in no mood to entertain her for much longer.

"Well, I don't fucking care! She is mine so move!" he spat and that really made both of you stunned. Was Pablo really ready to fight his own sister like she is some guy trying to steal you away!?

"Well, she is MY best friend!" Aurora said smirking that he was getting so worked up over it.

"Pablo!" you said in a warning tone and he looked towards you his eyes softening when they met you dark ones before he just groaned shrugging his shoulders in annoyance that you weren't backing him up. It felt like you were siding with her against him despite how crazy that sounds...

"You're just jealous she loves me more cabrón!" Aurora said not thinking that her brother would really take that seriously but those words really hurt Pablo's feelings.

He looked at you and when you didn't say anything he just turned around and stomped into your shared bedroom sadly. You sighed telling Rora that you need to talk to your boy about whatever is going on with him and she of course understood.

"Pablo? Amor, can we talk about it please.." you sat on the bed besides him where he had his head buried in a pillow.

"Are you sure you have time to talk to me?? Maybe Aurora wants to talk to you now too" Pablo said sarcastically and you really tried your best not to burst out in laughter that he was really jealous of his own sister.

"You're cute when you're jealous.." you said really enjoying him acting like a child whenever he got moody about something. It was one of the most adorable things about him to you.

"I'm not jealous!" he said turning to look at you warningly and you smile making his eyes soften when he looked at you.

"Do you really love her more than me??" he whispered like he was ashamed of the question and you moved to lay on top of him kissing his lips lovingly.

"Of course not Pablito! It's a different kind of love altogether. She is my best friend and my sister. But you..you are my lover..my soulmate..my home. I don't love anyone like I love you cariño" you said after pulling away smiling when you saw that his cheeks got pink in response.

"Maybe I was a little silly..but you're my girl baby <3" he said and you chuckled nodding your head and kissing his lips again while his strong arms wrapped around your waist to pull you even closer to him.

The longer you kissed the harder it got not to just rip each other's clothes off but when Pablo caught his breath whispering in your ear "maybe we should go to the beach alone tonight..I really need you amor" and you felt your panties get wet and your cheeks flushed. You wanted the same thing as him..but you just couldn't help yourself but to tease him a little bit.

"I think Rora wanted to do something tonight.." you said and he raised his brows at you with a disappointed face but when he saw you crack a smile he knew you were just messing with him.

"Amor!!" he said pulling you down and kissing all over your face while you giggled at his adorable reaction. Not jealous!? Yeah right!!

"I'm kidding Pablito!!! I'm all yours!" you said and he nodded liking that answer a lot better than previous one!

A few days later when Pablo finally realized how silly his little 'non jealous jealousy' was he of course apologized to Rora who called him a massive simp for you which he didn't deny.

He was a proud simp for the girl he loved more than anybody or anything else in this world!!

pablogavi

Sevilla, Spain

You're my girl, baby!! <33 tagged: y.n.bebe

comments:

y.n.bebe: forever yours bebé <3

pablogavi: te amo princesa!!

ansufati: too adorable for this world!! liked by pablogavi

ferrantorres: hermano living his best life!!

pablogavi: si señor!

fcbarcelona: love to see it!!

pablogavi: <3

aurorapaezg: best photographer ;)) but she's still MINE!! JAJA

pablogavi: shut up!! she's MINE!!

y.n.bebe: hehe <33

gavirafanclub: not him being jealous of his sister JAJAJA

pablitoosgirls: him being possessive of his girl ;)) so hot!!

aurorapaezlove: forever team rora!! hahaha

gavigavifan: idk if i'm jealous or in awe!!!!

I hope you enjoyed :))

#pablo gavi #pablo gavi icons #pablo gavi x reader #pablo gavi x y/n #pablo gavi x you #fc barca #fc barcelona #fc barça #gavi #gavigif #gavira #pablo martín páez gavira #pablo gavira #pablogavixreaderfluff #pablogavixreadersmut #gavi x reader #gavi x yn #gavi x you

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fairyyeo · 1 year

Text

christmas (baby please come home) ❅ seo changbin

pairing — bf!changbin x reader

genre — fluff

tw — alcohol consumption

wc — 1.9k

a/n — im so happy with this fic!! enjoy guys !! reblogs always appreciated <33

————

you hadn't seen changbin for a long while. 47 days to be exact—not that you were counting... work was getting the best of him, as always. in between touring and making new music and doing interviews he often struggled to find the time to call you.

changbin, ever the gentleman, thoroughly explained to you before agreeing to make your relationship official that he would constantly have work obligations that might make you feel like less than a priority. he assured you however, that despite what you may feel at times, you would always be his number one.

yet a week before christmas, you couldn't help but feel a little blue about the whole thing. you were out at a local cafe enjoying a nice hot chocolate. actually, enjoying was a bit of a reach. sure, it tasted good and had a few cute little marshmallows on top, but as you looked around at all the happy families and couples in the cafe, your heart ached.

a part of you (your entire being) wished changbin was here, with you, enjoying his own hot chocolate with holiday themed latte art. the snow was falling heavily when your phone began ringing and interrupted your miserable train of thought.

it was changbin.

you answered it immediately, a grin appearing on your face.

"hi changbin!" you said a little too excitedly, and loudly. it earned you a few annoyed glances from cafe goers.

"it's so good to hear your voice, baby." you could see his smile over the phone.

hearing changbin's voice after a week without a phone call from him was enough to make your heart race these days.

"yours too." you were grinning like a fool.

"hey listen," that meant bad news, "i've got something to tell you." you sensed his smile fade to a frown now.

"what is it?" your own smile wavered a bit too.

"i know we talked about the possibility of me coming home for christmas but," he sighed deeply before he spoke again, "it's not looking like i'll be able to make it. i'm really sorry, baby."

a frown replaced your grin and a few tears pricked your eyes, "that's okay, we can celebrate whenever you come home."

"hey, don't cry, please." changbin pleaded through the phone, his own heart breaking just a bit.

was it that obvious?

"i just miss you so much, bin." your voice cracked ever so slightly.

"i miss you too, baby. you're always on my mind. i wonder what you get up to. what you ate for breakfast. if you had a good day, things like that." changbin explained.

you sniffled, "i do the same for you."

"please don't be too sad, i'll be home as soon as i can." he promised.

"okay," you frowned, "i love you."

"bye baby, i love you too."

it's not like changbin found it easy to lie to you. in fact, that was probably the hardest thing he's ever had to do. but he wanted to surprise you, and this was the best way he could think of.

————

christmas eve rolled around just a week later and you'd secretly hoped changbin was just pulling your leg about the whole thing.

after finishing off some last minute gift wrapping in the morning, changbin wasn't there.

and after doing some baking for christmas day, changbin wasn't there.

and as you got into bed just before midnight on christmas eve, changbin still wasn't there.

so he wasn't joking, you thought as you teared up again.

see, you'd really hoped changbin was going to be home for christmas. your family were yet to meet him, of course because of his busy schedule, and they were all coming to your house for christmas lunch. you'd told them so much about him, they were almost more excited than you to see him. almost.

there's always next year.

————

christmas morning you woke up feeling blue as the LED lights on your tree. you had to remind yourself that you knew there'd be times like this when you first started dating him. pushing the feeling aside, you began preparing for your family's lunchtime arrival.

you laid the table neatly, began cooking all the food, and put your family's and changbin's gifts under the tree.

you'd still gotten him something even if he wasn't going to be there. you'd actually bought it before he even told you he wouldn't be there. it was a new set of headphones, he mentioned a while ago that he'd lost his other pair and how much he depends on them to do pretty much everything; work, sleep, exercise, all that stuff, and you doubted he'd had the time to get new ones.

an excited knock at the front door pulled you from your train of thought and to the front door. you wiped your hands on your apron before turning the doorknob.

your family stood happily on the front door step (your family being everyone—extended family included. your mother, father, two siblings, grandmother, aunt and uncle, and your three cousins. that was ten people, eleven including yourself.)

"merry christmas!" they all exclaimed.

you smiled, glad to see them, "merry christmas!" you repeated as you welcomed them inside.

it didn't take long for everyone to take off their jackets and warm up in the living room. your brother wooyoung and sister haewon helped you out with lunch in the kitchen, simultaneously comforting you as you explained how changbin wasn't coming home for christmas. it was nice to catch up with your family, especially your siblings since you'd been feeling a little lonelier than usual lately.

they helped you bring all the food and bottles of wine to the table. you announced that lunch was ready and everyone filtered over to their chosen seats at the table and began to eat.

just as you were about to help yourself there was a solid knock at the door.

"excuse me for a moment." your brows furrowed, "i'm not expecting anyone else." you mumbled to yourself as you made your way to the front door.

you once again wiped your hands on your apron, which, after making lunch, was now covered in various marks from cooking.

when you opened and saw who it was you honestly thought you were dreaming.

"hope i'm not too late?" changbin grinned, a neatly wrapped gift under one arm and a bag of smaller gifts in his opposite hand. "i had to stop by my parent's house." ever the family man.

"changbin!" you exclaimed, practically leaping into his arms despite their preoccupation. "i missed you so much." you squeezed him tight.

"i missed you more, baby." he kissed your cheek as you let go of him.

but then it hit you.

"you asshole!" you whacked his chest with a smile, "i've been glum all week because of you!"

"i didn't want to lie to you, trust me, but chan and jisung thought it would be a good idea to surprise you." he said with a hearty laugh. "so are you surprised?"

god you'd missed that laugh.

"i really am." you couldn't stop smiling as you pulled him inside, "my whole family is here, are you ready to meet them? it's okay if you aren't, i'll kick them out." you were only being semi-serious as you peered up at him.

"what? no! i'm eager to meet them, i even brought these." he held up the bag of gifts.

"you brought them presents?" you were even more surprised now. he hadn't met your family yet.

"i remember you mentioning that you were cooking christmas lunch for your whole family." he shrugged. "this one is for you anyway." he tried his best to wiggle his shoulder that the gift was wedged under.

you took the bag of gifts from him, allowing him to properly hold your gift. "we can put these under the tree for now, then you have to come eat lunch and meet everyone." you were positively beaming.

you helped him put the presents under the tree before pulling up a spare chair next to your own at the dining table. you introduced him to everyone, and as most families do, they began bombarding your poor boyfriend with excited questions. changbin, ever the gentlemen as you always say, gladly answered them all as he dug into his lunch.

he'd really missed your cooking, he thought as he continued answering questions about himself and your relationship.

after everyone was totally full from lunch, you all began exchanging gifts. your family was just as surprised as you had been to recieve gifts from changbin. they felt so bad for not getting him anything, but he only joked and said that they'd have to get him twice as much next year.

your family really liked him.

changbin adored his gift. "i can't believe you remembered i said that!" he said as he opened it. "i can't thank you enough, baby. headphones are just after you on the list of things i can't live without." he leaned in to pepper your cheek with kisses.

from changbin you received something truly special that he knew you'd love. it was a mixtape of demo songs he'd written about you since he met you—including those he'd written before you were dating. he'd felt really awful spending more time away from you than with you, and he knew that you liked romantic gestures such as this. it was the only other way besides surprising you that he could think of to start making up for lost time.

"hey, no crying." changbin wiped a few of your tears as you read the titles of the songs, you'd listen to them later, you knew you'd bawl your eyes out.

luckily your family were too busy with their own gift giving to notice your happy tears, wooyoung and haewon would definitely tease you if they saw.

after gift exchanging came drinking wine into the evening. especially you, changbin, your siblings, and your cousins. it was fun having a laugh and catching up with everyone. you heart felt full as you saw wooyoung and haewon getting along really well with changbin, almost too well, you thought as wooyoung began an unmatched tackle with changbin.

but soon, your family were saying their goodbyes, giving hugs, and wishing happy new years to you and changbin, as you wouldn't see them until after the new year.

wooyoung and haewon drunkenly whispered things like, "marry him." and, "he's a keeper." as you laughed and shoved them off the front door step towards your parent's car.

"c'mon, let's clean up." you dragged changbin to the dining table but he protested.

"can't we tidy up tomorrow?" he pouted. "i've missed you."

you jokingly narrowed your eyes at him, "don't try and guilt trip me."

"fine, fine." he raised his hands in surrender and began to stack plates with you. "you know, i'm not finished making it up to you." changbin side eyed you to catch your reaction.

you put down your handful of empty wine glasses, "we are cleaning up first thing tomorrow morning."

his head snapped up as he smiled in success, "i promise."

you weren't usually this easily swayed by anything, but to be fair, you'd really missed the feeling of being in his arms. and the feeling of, well, other things.

changbin hastily began untying your apron and pulling you closer to the bedroom. "merry christmas, baby." he whispered against your lips.

your bed needed a little warming up anyway.

#stray kids ff #stray kids fanfic #stray kids reactions #stray kids angst #stray kids fluff #stray kids x reader #stray kids scenarios #stray kids imagines #stray kids #changbin fluff #changbin angst #changbin x reader #changbin ff #changbin fanfic #changbin reactions #changbin scenarios #changbin imagines #changbin #seo changbin

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sukirichi · 2 years

Text

[ DUSK ‘TILL DAWN : 007 ]

“we who bear the burden of the crown do not need to love. you only need to stay here, with me, in power, in greed, in lust – in victory.”

c/w. modern royal au. infidelity. angst. gaslighting. toxic characters. suggestive. toxic relationships. mentions of neglect and abuse. hurt and comfort. it’s cringy when suna calls us ‘my love.’ half heartedly edited.

notes. this chapter is dedicated to all my fellow oikawa fuckers, enjoy <33 i’m really in love with how deep his character can be like lowkey he has more personality (as of now) than rintaro lol

series masterlist | next

[ SEVEN ] i know you don’t really see my worth. you think you’re the last guy on earth, well, i’ve got news for you. i know i’m not that strong, but it won’t take long

“Would you stop pacing?” Prince Tooru reprimanded. His wife, the ever-so-sweet Maiko, jumped a little at the sting of his voice. She was no longer an alien to his harshness, nor was it anything new for her the way he sent daggers her direction. “It’s an eyesore.”

“My apologies, Your Highness. I just... I’m extremely worried for the Princess.”

The Prince kept flicking through the television. However, behind his uncaring facade, he shared the same sentiments as her. Everyone would be lying if they said the entire manor hadn’t been deadly quiet the entire night, save for the hushed whispers between your servants appalled by Rintaro’s display. Tooru was actually impressed they hadn’t called your parents by now. Your servants watched you grow up and had been loyal to your family for years, yet not a single one of them stopped the Crown Prince from dragging their precious Princess like she was nothing but prey. Then again, Tooru mused, maids from a noble family would never go against the crown.

“You heard what Kiyoomi said. The Princess wants space, and Suna will not let us step a foot outside either. We have no choice but to await her return.”

“Would she even return?”

Hearing the scuffle of her feet rubbing against the carpet one more time, Tooru dragged a palm down his face. “Look. I cannot answer your questions, so can we please just go to sleep?” Sleep, of course, meaning that Prince Tooru enjoyed the luxury of your guest room’s king-sized bed while his wife remained on the couch. Hell, he was kind enough to share the same room as her.

Unbothered by the Prince’s nonchalance, Maiko gazed at her feet and fiddled with her fingers.

“Your Highness, I-I know this sounds far-fetched of me, but would you grant me a small favour? I promise I would repay you generously—”

“If you offer to leave me the fuck alone for a month, I might consider it.”

Maiko’s head snapped up. Her husband held no trace of remorse on his face as he pulled the blankets under his chin, handsome as usual—as all the Princes were—even with his eyes peacefully closed. Such a sight made him look unbelievably gentle with the way soft, brown strands of hair brushed over his forehead. And Maiko, poor Maiko who never learned, had no choice but to swallow her pride and give in to the Prince’s request. Whether it was because she had been in love him with him for the longest time and this was the first, possibly last, chance he would ever hear out, Maiko prioritized your well-being over anything else.

“I...Of course, Your Highness. If it is what you wish.”

Tooru raised a brow in disbelief, eyes narrowed at his wife’s sagging shoulders. Just like that? Ah, but he wasn’t complaining. “Fine. What do you want?”

“Please find the Princess. O-Or at least check up on her, talk to her or something. Anything would be of great help as long as she knew she does not have to face this alone. The Princess is having a hard time and it breaks my heart to imagine she is all by herself—”

“Why don’t you go yourself if you care so badly?”

“Because...” Maiko frowned, “If the Crown Prince catches me, I am done for. He might be far more merciful to you considering you are his brother.”

“That is hilarious,” Tooru couldn’t hold back a guffaw. “You think Rintaro would be less bothered if his brother sought out his damsel in distress of a wife? Oh, how gold. Has it not crossed your mind that Rintaro is oddly possessive over his wife? He thinks either Kiyoomi and I will snag her up.”

“But you will not, so—”

“What if I did, hm?” he challenged. Instantly, Maiko held her breath, awaiting the threat—or rather the possibility—that Tooru didn’t jester. He had always made it clear how he didn’t want her. Expressing at any opportunity he could take about his desire to have had the privilege to choose who he could have been married to, and Maiko knew exactly what he was doing. The Prince, just like now, was simply reminding her the consequences of her actions. But she must have been a true masochist as she remained mum in her spot the longer he continued, sitting up now and tilting his head with a smirk. “The Princess is gorgeous. I could easily choose her over you any day, so let me ask—would you still want me to find her and lend her a shoulder to cry on?”

Be strong, Maiko—was what she must be thinking. And honestly? Tooru thought it was complete, utter bullshit. She could plant her feet on the ground as solidly as she could, but he refused to have his bones buried next to hers.

Maiko had already taken his life.

He should choose his own death now, and if that meant slowly driving a dagger deep into her heart and carving out his to place into the mercy of your hands—because god forbid, you would be death of everyone someday—then Tooru would have no regrets. To have his fate intertwined with yours, whether the outcome may be bitter or would shatter him to pieces, would be honourable. A heaven in comparison to the hell bowing his head at him right now.

“We are family now, Your Highness. She needs us.”

“I take that as a yes?” Tooru mocked. He didn’t wait for her response as he was swiping his car keys off the counter the next second, his jacket shrugged on and halfway out the door before he sang, “As you wish, my dear.”

There are some things Tooru would never admit out loud. One, how he grew up closest to Kiyoomi and Keiji out of their shared love for literature, and that those two brothers of his held one of his most embarrassing secrets on how Tooru loved romantic novels. Jane Austen? He personally booked a theatre all for himself just to watch the film adaptations of her works. Margaret Mitchell? Tooru had handmade notebooks buried deep within his study filled with his favourite lines from her in perfect cursive; the younger version of him fantasizing about what it felt like to yearn for somebody your being felt incomplete without them. Two, how grateful he was deep down that Maiko had asked him to find you, because truth be told, only Rintaro got in his way. He would have ran after you hours ago the moment his bastard brother returned to the manor without his wife in tow. But appearances must be kept, trouble must be avoided if it provided more conflict than entertainment, and looking at it now, Tooru didn’t quite regret his previous actions.

The pitch-black sky felt more comforting than haunting as he pulled out of the driveway and headed to town. Maiko informed him you were at your family’s bed and breakfast, quite possibly asleep, but fuck it, right? Tooru convinced himself he wasn’t doing this for his wife. Never for Maiko, but not quite for you, either. Other than having a miserably pretty face that wasn’t as adored as it should be, and a heart bigger than Maiko was capable of, Tooru came to a conclusion he was doing it for himself.

Yes, he was simply a bored prince. Dragged into the edge of the country with no phones to use since Maiko would just snoop around, and Rintaro didn’t help with the situation by driving everybody apart. Even Kiyoomi seemed more of a bore than usual. So yes, Tooru was fetching you for his own gain, because surely listening to a broken hearted woman weep about her woes sounded far more entertaining than pretending to be asleep back at the manor.

No. He did not care about you at all.

He does not care one bit as he found you minutes later, sulking like a little child on the swings under an old sycamore tree whose leaves danced amongst the wind. He would admit, however, that you were undeniably beautiful. You always had been.

With a fresh face that granted him the luxury of seeing how crestfallen, forlorn eyes could remain dull under the moonlight’s gleam, Tooru tightened his grip on the scotch bottle. He wondered how sadness could look so beguiling on someone—whatnot with the lines of your frown and the absence of light you usually emanated. You sat there unaware of his presence looming overhead of you before you kicked and up high you flew. Skirt flowing at the same time you finally turned your head to look up at the sky, eyes glistening with tears and kissable lips quivering with slow, shuddered breaths he knew held back a sob. Tooru couldn’t help but find it befitting how you would one day hold power over everyone, because you were capable of breaking hearts. You could ruin kingdoms and tear everything apart. Yet, Tooru also knew how gentle you could be. He had shared enough family dinners with you to grow envious—no matter if he was aware they were all a sham—with the way you and Rintaro would share knowing smiles with each other like you both spoke a secret language exclusive only for those who had experienced falling in love.

Was this why Rintaro was so adamant in keeping you?

Had his brother even looked at you this way?

You made princes like him who grew up skilled in the arts of swordsmanship and combat weak in the knees. All you had to do was keep kicking your feet and fly higher up in the air and Tooru wouldn’t have argued if somebody told him he saw a fairy that night. A fairy who shed tears for a man unworthy of it. A fairy who mourned for a love that was never hers and whose cries were as muted as the dumbfounded Prince tracing the shape of your lips with his eyes and wonders, what would his name sound like if you whispered it to his ears? Would it feel biblical if Tooru could also share a secret language with you and murmur it into the crevices of your palm in a promising kiss, or would your words curse him into a thoughtless follower who walked into his own demise? You would be his Queen, after all. You would be the one he would fight for his life with, and whose wishes would become his command—his only good reason for living.

“Fuck,” Tooru muttered under his breath as he leant against his car. He could already feel his heart pounding. And for what? The spine-chilling realization of—or more like could no longer deny—that he found his brother’s wife mesmerizing? “Fuck you, Rintaro. I don’t wanna be like you. I’m not stealing anybody’s wife.”

Tooru chanted those words in his head like a mantra.

He needed more than a bottle of alcohol to get him through the night without accidentally blurting anything stupid, which he was certain was the last thing you needed. Tonight, you needed a friend. You needed someone with genuine intentions after being cruelly dragged into a make believe story of Prince meets Beauty, only to wake up with an unfortunate twist of Beauty and the Beast where happy endings didn’t exist when Rintaro was the Beast through and through.

Tonight, you would not be Prince and Princess.

Tooru would come as himself, and with a clear of his throat, plastered on his infamous smirk. “The night is too good to spend alone, Your Highness. I am quite certain no lovely woman would envision their honeymoon to turn out this way.”

You halted your body from swinging up.

Eyes widening at the sight of the Fifth Prince in nothing but sleepwear and a coat, your mouth falls open. You must have remembered you were now a Princess and had to act properly in front of a royal blood that you sat up straight. The action had Tooru sucking in a sharp breath before making himself comfortable on the swing beside you, opting to stare out in the vast fields because his chest was fluttering at the look on your face. How relieved you seemed upon seeing him. Like he was your hero even if he was far from having heroic attributes, and Tooru bit the insides of his cheeks.

He loathed how that passing moment made him feel important and brought a tint to his cheeks.

“Your Highness,” you began, “Wh-What brings you here?”

“To comfort a certain lonely Princess,” he winked, and you respond with a surprised squeak. “What? Can’t believe that the most handsome Prince is now your knight in shining armour? Don’t flatter yourself, though. This will not be a daily occurrence and—”

“Thank you.” Ducking your head, you stare at your lap, and Tooru patiently waited for you to continue speaking. He could see your eyes water as you swallow audibly, “I...I did not think anyone would bother to come find me, much less you, my Prince. Out of everybody, I thought you might have cared the least, but forgive me for I was mistaken.”

“Well,” he shrugged, “Not everyone is as heartless as Rintaro. Not your fault too that you thought of me that way.”

The both of you share a knowing smile—his telling you that you would be alright, and you reciprocating a thankful one. A comfortable silence settled after that. None of you found the need to talk about anything when Tooru wasn’t the best at comforting, and you were more than satisfied for the company. It shocked him, though, how he unexpectedly ended up playing in the swings with his brother’s wife at three in the morning, surrounded by nothing but grass and the faint sounds of crickets chirping. The wind would occasionally hum, and so did you.

The intimate beginning of a core memory felt like a scene straight out of a novel, but Tooru knew better. As much as he cherished this moment of sharing a silence with somebody in a world filled with people demanding for answers and explanations, Tooru understood this moment would not last. He had to remind himself he wasn’t your Prince. You weren’t his Princess. You were both just royals stripped of their titles until they were reduced to nothing but humans at their rawest form—a Princess with a disloyal husband, a broken heart and pride, and him as a Prince who didn’t quite knew where he belonged. At least, Tooru knew his place, and maybe that was why it felt a bit wrong to be the one next to you this moment. You were newly married and should be having this emotional intimacy with your husband. Not his brother. It was a constant fight of push and pull in his brain of wanting to be greedy and have more for this, whatever the fuck this was, whatever the fuck it meant now that you were smiling to yourself without saying anything, but Tooru chose to be the bigger person and stop kicking his feet.

“Say,” he scrunched his nose, “The town is dead, and you look like you have a lot to get off your chest. What do you say about a drive up the hill? You can scream as much as you want there.”

“Scream? Why would I scream?”

“Curse out Rintaro. I do that a lot when he gets on my nerves.”

When you laughed at his words, Tooru had to stop himself from getting too ahead of himself. Surely, it didn’t mean anything at all that he just made a pretty Princess laugh, even if your laugh was so airy and sounded so nice he would have taken full credit of doing a job well done for being a temporary friend.

“That does not sound too bad. In fact, I know a spot.”

The spot being a ten minute walk up the hill, far enough to be hidden from the prying gaze despite everybody being asleep but close enough that Tooru could retrace the steps back to the town in fear you would get lost again. Not that he had to worry. You were already steps ahead of him, shoes looped into your fingers as your toes dug into the bare earth—the very spitting image of a woman he couldn’t have most with sparkling hair pins keeping the strands kissed by the wind at bay.

Right. He needed to look away.

You were not his to appreciate.

“How did you find me, Prince Tooru?” you asked when you’d both settled next to each other, knees slightly brushing with every relaxed move.

Prying his eyes away from your fingers spreading to let the blades of grass peek through the spaces, Tooru raised a shoulder. Stop, he chastised himself. Do not muse about how strong the soil must be that night to carry the unspoken sorrows that weighed heavier than earth itself. Do not put yourself into the shoes birthed with a responsibility you were not man enough to step in on.

“Let’s just say that my wife and I never really went to the shop centres. That was nothing but a lame excuse we had to tell her parents. Instead, I roamed around this lovely town of yours and wished earlier that this might as well be my spot—but of course, this has always been yours, isn’t it?” he attempted to lighten the mood, “You have a lovely view from here.”

While his view from his bedroom, up north in the Inarizaki Tower, granted him the vision of a god who saw all from the citizens rising early in the morning to mill about for work to children laughing as they chased each other outside their parents’ humble, little shops, nothing could have compared to the serenity of Greenville. Miles and miles of land rich with flowers and fruitful trees laid home to rows of grapevines; its scent so addicting the Prince might as well have gotten drunk from a single whiff. The land stretched overhead until the peak of the mountains along the edge allowed room for the sun to stretch its arms out in a few hours’ time. Crickets chirped. The wind sang a lullaby that put the people to sleep, and he had you next to him. Close enough he might have plucked out the flower tempting him nearby with its dulcet beauty and humorously recite you poetry like he was your lover if that would make you smile.

Unfortunately, you didn’t share the same sentiments as him. “I doubt anything could be lovely from now on.”

“Don’t let my brother get to you.”

“That is easy for you to say,” you exhaled, “You and your brothers all the same. We, as wives, never meant anything significant to your hearts. You throw us to the side away like we are lesser than dust. I doubt you could even understand my pain when you are clearly incapable of being a good husband with the inability to feel love.”

Biting back his tongue to ask “don’t you want to prove me wrong about that?”, Tooru blew a low whistle. “You don’t pull your punches, do you? That is harsh.”

“Well, I see no need to coddle you, my Prince. You are a grown man who needs to realize his own disgusting flaws.”

At any other day, Tooru would’ve taken the unnecessary projection of your own heartbreak out to him with disdain, but today was different. For his own entertainment, he would be a little kinder. A little more patient. So he let it slide, and masked his confused heart with the one thing he had perfected—the all-too-confident smile that made men and women weak in the knees. The smile that brought him to where he is now, married and unhappy.

“Oh, there is no need, Princess. I am more than well aware of what makes me terrible,” he admitted, “What my brother did was wrong. There is no excuse for his behaviour, but you must understand—this is all very common to us now. Rintaro was able to deceive you like that because he had seen it with his own eyes; how marriages needed to be successful politically but never romantically, and once he has a goal in mind, nothing is stopping him from achieving that,” it was more of a warning than a reminder, and Tooru snuck a glance to confirm if you understood where he was going. “Do not take it personally, Princess. Rintaro would have been a liar either way whether it was you or not that he first laid his eyes on.”

“Is that supposed to comfort me?”

“I am shit at comforting others—” a laugh was pulled from him before the Prince steals the bottle from your hands and takes a swig. “—but I do sincerely hope you stop crying now.”

His words had the opposite effect. Not even past the neck of the bottle, you choked before him in a fit of sniffles and sobs. Eyes puffy and red, lips wobbly and fingers angrily wiping away at the tears you desperately tried to conceal from his stupefied gaze. “What do you care whether I cry or not?”

Out of instinct, Tooru’s arm reached out to stop you from pinching your cheeks.

Slapped by logic, on the other hand, his arm retreated by itself because he was only here to comfort, not to reassure. And bound by the foolishness that was called the never-learning vulnerable heart, Tooru found himself in the middle of heaven and hell as he sighs. “Believe it or not, Princess, but I do care,” was his confession, though before you could ponder too much about it, the Prince was already hogging the scotch. “Implausible, is it not? But I do not blame you for it. I know I seem unable to care about others when I hate my own wife, even if she has been nothing but an angel to me.”

“So you know Princess Maiko adores you. Why do you not treat her with the same kindness, then?”

Princess Maiko again. It always had to circle back to her.

“She annoys me. She clings to me like an obsessed leech and demands affection when she knows I have no interest in reciprocating it,” he scoffed, “It is for her own good, though. There is no point to fool herself we can be happy together when I never wanted to be married. It is better to break her heart from the beginning than be sweet to her and get her hopes up.” The Prince held no room for argument. Palms leaning back on the grass, he extends his leg and crosses them as he glares at the sky like the darkness caused all this trouble. “No idea what anybody told you, but Princess Maiko and I were not married under the Queen’s choice. It was Maiko’s.”

“Princess Maiko...proposed to you?”

“Something like that. Maiko is a year younger than me, and naturally, since our families had close connections to each other, I grew up treating her like my little sister. She was always clumsy and stupid that I feared she’d get into trouble if not properly watched over. Little did I know that my concern for her would grow into being lovesick, and next thing I know, she is begging with the Queen to marry me. One thing led to another, the Queen saw potential in our union, and now here we are.”

“You make it sound like you had no choice in this, yet you still let her walk down that aisle. Are you sure you are not just using the Queen as an excuse?”

“If I did not marry Maiko, the Queen would have kicked me out the palace.”

“That is legal?”

Tooru wore a face that said beats me. “When there are too many Princes in a patriarchal monarchy, there will be hierarchy among our worth. The First Prince is already worthy to remain in the family as the eldest heir, and then Rintaro is the only child of the King and Queen. Prince Shinsuke will never have to worry about not being Prince when his mother plays a large role in the Kingdom as one of their best lawyers. The twins, too, come from a wealthy mother whose chain of businesses greatly benefits the palace. The youngest, Prince Tobio, is naturally adored by everybody else. He is given everything without having to ask for it. But the rest of us? We have to fight for our place in the dinner table. My clan is not exactly on good terms with the royal family, either.”

“But did you not say you did not care about being Prince?”

“I don’t. The duties of a Prince wears me out and I hate having to put on a facade all the time, but I have no place where I belong in,” his voice grew somber, the tips of his ears tinting red at the realization he was actually being vulnerable to someone who wasn’t his brother. Hell, he didn’t even trust his brothers anymore the night titles mattered more than familial bond, yet here he was. “My mother... her family does not accept me because she was a married woman who had me after having an affair with the King, and the King never looked at me once when I was born. He merely had me to establish ties with the Oikawa Clan, but when he realized my maternal grandparents barely recognized me as their own, I was useless to him. So as much as I despise being a Prince, it is the only way I can actually live. If not for my title, I would have already been sent to the streets.”

Tooru was quietly begging whatever gods looked down on him that you wouldn’t look at him with pity. The last thing he wanted was to be pitiful.

Sneaking a glance after a split second decision dissolved his worries, because you were far from seeing him as less. No, you glanced at him more out of curiosity. Like if he allowed you to give it more thought, you could magically have a solution. “Then...if you are not that important to them despite being an heir to one of three founding clans, why could Prince Kiyoomi not be important, as well? He is the Second Prince. Is that why he married Princess Iris—to ensure his title of a Prince?”

“Nobody knows why Iris and Kiyoomi got married, and neither will anyone of them talk about it. None of us were even invited to their wedding. We just woke up the next day and found out our brother had gotten married with minimal preparations, but it was all over the news. The Kingdom ate their marriage and claimed it to be a firmer peace treaty over Inarizaki and Itachiyama.”

You hid a sniffle.

“...How long has Prince Suna and Princess Iris been together?”

Tooru believed it was best you knew less. But the look on your face begged, pleaded to have that certain itch scratched that Tooru had to give in. “They met when they were in high school,” he supplied, albeit hesitantly, “Iris was a scholar of the royal family as her mother was a loyal follower of the Queen despite being born in Itachiyama, and Iris was an intelligent girl. They hit it off ever since, but drifted apart due to obvious reasons. Then they met again right after the wedding, and have been inseparable ever since.”

God. He really shouldn’t have said it. He had barely finished speaking before you pulled your knees up to your chest, head buried between your legs and sobs stifled in the eerie silence. “Oh my god. I look like a fool, don’t I? They’ve known each other forever.”

“None of this was your fault, Princess. Don’t beat yourself up over it.”

“It was my fault, though. I-I knew all this time,” you were full on sobbing by now. “I found out the night we announced our engagement. Ever since that day, I knew whatever we had was never real, but I proceeded with the wedding anyway because I hoped he would still look at me the same way. D-Do you have any idea how much it hurts to learn that you were never loved in the first place?”

Your voice cracked with every sharp breath. Fingers lifting to dig into your scalp deep enough the skin turned raw, and Tooru was immediately peeling your hands away from yourself. “Princess, breathe. Do not hurt yourself—”

“It kills me, Your Highness. I have never felt this pathetic before.”

“Princess...”

“I can’t stop looking in the mirror and find a warped reflection of myself staring back,” you wail and flick his arm away, like the thought of being touched by someone else repulsive. “Every day, I see nothing but my flaws and insecurities and think, is this why he doesn’t love me? Am I not pretty enough? Am I not good enough? Will I never compare to Iris? I feel so horribly ugly and disgusted of my own skin.”

“Don’t think that. You’re beautiful.”

“His Highness said otherwise—”

“My brother is fucking stupid for taking you for granted. If you were mine, I would have never made you feel like you were not good enough.”

Your head slowly turns to face him, the previous sobs now dwindling into little sniffles, but Tooru was already looking away. Downing his wine before you could say anything else. Drinking fast enough his brain felt muddled and there was an ache forming at the back of his head, but anything. Anything to escape the prying eyes wet with tears as the confession settled into the air.

He either fucked it up, or started a new chapter along the way.

The sound of you crying harder again brought him no answer.

“I w-wish...he thought the same way.”

What did it all mean? This moment... when you looked at him now, clinging to whatever hope was left in your love struck heart. When you looked at him now, smile flattened upon the mutual understanding that maybe this was what it meant. Not quite friendship, not quite partnership, not quite acquaintances—but the gentle promise that when the castle and its burdens grew too suffocating, you would have the Fifth Prince to run to out of the thousand others living under the grand halls of royalty. And if you had even the slightest inkling that perhaps Tooru might be growing too warm in a cold night, he was comforted enough by the fact you and him were as impossible as him and his wife.

Whatever attraction he held for you simply had to die. Whatever happened tonight stays within this spot closest to the stars in a quiet town called Greenville.

“Let him go,” was all Tooru could offer before his hand covered yours—that silly smile returning on his face again as if to say the pain would pass. “He’s stupid, anyway.”

“Right.” Finally, fucking finally, you smile brighter than he ever could. “He is stupid.”

“What the fuck were you doing with my wife?”

No good thing ever lasted. It was a fact Tooru learned the hard way, and had to relearn once more when he brought you back ‘home.’ After an hour and a half more of sharing jokes that slowly, the both of you were forming your own secret language Rintaro would not be a part of, you decided to loosen up a bit and steal the rest of his drink. Well, he brought it for you, but he didn’t quite expect you to rummage around his own hidden stash in the car of flasks, only to be giggling and practically dead weight in his arms later on.

It was good until it lasted.

It was good until he showed up. Tooru hadn’t stopped scowling since your husband bundled you in his jacket and held you like you were a fragile woman in need of care. Sure, you could be, but if Rintaro knew it all along, why hadn’t he been more careful since the beginning? Tooru hated inconsistency. Hated lying out of everything—all of the traits his younger brother was an expert of.

It was absolutely revolting how he immediately took on the role of a concerned husband and carried you to bed when you passed out in his arms—like he hadn’t been the reason you felt the need to drink yourself to such a state.

“Only what you should have done.”

Rintaro grabbed him by the collar, their eyes levelled but neither giving in. “Don’t mess with me, Tooru. You think I don’t know what you’re doing, huh? Making my wife warm up to you so you can mess up everything I worked hard for?”

“I didn’t do shit. You ruined everything by yourself and you know it.”

“You still had no business going after her like that.”

“Are you fuckin’ serious?” gritting his teeth, Tooru shoved Rin back hard enough his back hit the doorframe. Although the impact didn’t cause too much of a sound, he still glanced your way to see if you had awoken before lowering his voice. “Your wife cried for hours. She could barely breathe well from how overwhelmed she is, and what were you doing? Oh, that’s right. Fucking your mistress while your wife wondered over and over again just what made her so unworthy of love in your eyes. It’s actually pathetic that such an amazing woman would shed these much tears over a man who can’t even tell her the truth about his malicious nature!”

Rintaro snickered, and it took all of Tooru’s patience to not punch his brother.

“Since when have you cared about the Princess?”

“Maybe we all do, Rintaro! Maybe every single one of us is tired that you and your mother are the exact same—you do nothing but manipulate people for your own gain and then wonder why your lives are so miserable! Your wife loves you, Rin. She would forgive you at the blink of an eye but it does not give you the right to abuse her kindness.”

“That is hypocritical coming from you. You talk as if you do not neglect your wife and leave her crying, too.”

“Maiko, Maiko, it’s always about stupid, fucking Maiko!” he fumed, “Don’t fucking pit me with you, asshole. You courted Princess Y/N for two years and had no intention of coming clean about your sins. Everybody knows I never wanted this marriage. It was Maiko who bound me with these shackles because she was obsessed with me!”

Rintaro was at a loss of words.

He, too, knew that in some way, Tooru had been better. Tooru had always been consistent over his disapproval of the marriage, and had no choice but to accept it in order to survive the harsh environment of the palace. But did Rintaro care?

Obviously not.

“Go back home. I don’t need you here.”

Tooru scoffed. “If it brings you any comfort—” with his back turned to his brother, he glared at him one last time on the way out. “I didn’t come here of my own volition. It was Maiko who requested me to go. Nobody’s out here stealing who isn’t theirs.” An excuse, a valid reason, a half truth—call it what you wanted. Tooru wasn’t sure himself either which one of it he truly meant when he could still smell your perfume all over him on the drive back to the manor.

At one point in your life, you became a Princess before you married a Prince.

It happened that one fateful night. Where elites, nobles, royals, and all the important figures in the world gathered in a grandiose castle in celebration of a Prince’s eighteenth birthday. Naturally, as the daughter of two of the trusted followers of the throne, you had been invited. You could still picture it all clearly—the weeks ahead of preparation despite being a guest who would most likely befriend the shadows and be accompanied by the walls until the party ended. Still, your mother insisted you be dressed to the nines. Calling out for the best dressmakers to travel to Inarizaki with the sole purpose of transforming you into—as what your mother called —“a butterfly who attracted attention, but would be out of reach.”

You were close to telling your mother she would return home from the party disappointed. Unless she could accept you were more of a moth who clung to the unknown corners.

Not that you thought lowly of yourself, but you preferred the term... realistic. Yes, realistic was what you were. You simply accepted the fact you weren’t the prettiest, the most sociable, nor the most interesting woman to ever be attending these balls. Perhaps only slightly above average all thanks to the respectable status and money you were born with, but otherwise not as dreamy as your mother painted you out to be.

See, you weren’t the best dancer. Your mother had given up halfway into dancing classes once she realized you were a lost cause. Little did the both of you know, that from that night onwards, the young woman who had two left feet would someday master the art of dancing all to impress a certain Prince who wouldn’t stop looking at her that night.

His name was Suna Rintaro—the Crown Prince by birth.

And you had caught his eye.

In fact, you must have captured his entire attention and bewitched his whole being that he was unable to take his eyes off of you and pushed through the crowd, all to ask for a dance.

You said yes. He said you made him the happiest man that night.

“Truly?” he echoed, as if a gorgeous Prince like him ever experienced his dance invitations rejected before. “You would dance with me?”

“It would be my pleasure, Your Highness. I...I am not great at dancing though,” you began to stutter, palms growing damp behind the lace gloves. “Perhaps you ought to find somebody better? I am uncertain I am the best choice to dance with tonight—”

“You are the best choice,” the Prince grinned, and your heart skipped a beat in awe at how someone could be effortlessly charming. You barely even noticed he was already leading you to the dance floor until you felt a hundred pair of eyes on you. All these people who bore more importance and held heavier money in their pockets witnessed how the Prince slid his warm hand above your waist then, his smile just as soothing as the little finger rubs to ease your nerves. “You are—” he leant closer, lips brushing against the shell of your ear. “The only one who I want to share this dance with.”

You awoke with a jolt, heart pounding a mile a minute as the memory replayed in your head. Like a film caught on tape, you could still hear the violins singing at the top of their lungs, the cello hitting deep notes that vibrated within your bones. You could still feel the warmth of the Prince’s touch as he danced the night away with you. How gentle he had been to walk you out the gardens just to shyly murmur how he found you beautiful.

Beautiful.

Until suddenly you were not—or more like, you had never been beautiful to him.

“My love,” a voice—one that used to be comforting but now only brought pain—broke you out of your reverie. “I prepared breakfast for you. We should go downstairs and eat.”

Your husband, Rintaro, sat at the edge of your bed with a pinched frown. As if he was worried. He had no right to be, yet somehow, there was still that voice at the back of your head rejoicing in delight. Because he came. He came to find you. You woke up with him, and sure, it didn’t erase yesterday’s events, but could it mean something? You so badly wanted to reach out to him when his hand snaked across the mattress to find yours. Offering you a small squeeze. Looking so concerned you would have believed it all over again.

How was it possible someone could be both your happiness and torment?

No! your inner voice screamed at you. Don’t let him get close.

Blinking back the tears you hadn’t noticed arrived, you kicked the blankets off of you and trudged to the bathroom when you felt bile rise from your throat. Right. Such great timing. You were pushing the toilet lid up the next second, knees scraping against the floor as you emptied your stomach. Your head pounded as you did so, and you winced, remembering just now how Prince Tooru had visited and you drank yourself to your limit.

Which, obviously, was a decision you regretted making.

“My love!” Rintaro was behind you in an instant. He rubbed your back, held your hair up as you retched a few more times, and whispered sweet nothings that did nothing but to intensify that sick feeling in your stomach. “How much did you drink? I was so worried for you, honey—”

You slapped his hand away.

“Don’t call me that.”

If Rintaro looked defeated, he hid it extremely well. “Please. I only worry for you,” he helped you up on your feet. Fortunately for him, you were too wobbly on your own legs to complain. You quietly let him sit you on the closed toilet and sat down before you, his knees brushing against your bare feet and his handsome face deceitfully worn. “Listen...we can talk about it later, alright? You need to eat first before you get even more sick.”

“You are concerned over my well-being?”

“I am—”

“It did not feel like that yesterday.”

“Please. Let’s stop fighting.” How rare for the Crown Prince to beg, much say please more than once in a row. Wasn’t he too prideful for that?

As much as you basked in how this man was now on his knees for you, you didn’t trust yourself to not give in to whatever he asked of you. True as it was that it hurt, love didn’t disappear in a night. It wasn’t that easy to un-love someone you planned your whole life with. Of course, going back to that same hellish place he put you in would truly paint you the ignoramus, but you currently didn’t have the power to say no to him just yet. It was two years of being wired to please him at all costs. And it would take more than that to unlearn all the habits you’d formed just to align with who he wanted you to be.

But things would change now. It would no longer be the same, and you could only hope the next chapters of your life would bring about a better change.

Today marked the beginning of you detaching from your husband.

Pushing past him, you walked out with clenched fists. You would not cry in front of him now. You would not let him feel the satisfaction of how perfectly he’d executed his plan of wrapping himself around your finger until the end crashed you both. You would not let him see that you still loved him, still craved him, still fucking wished he would be genuine in comforting you and not because he had to keep you as his pliant wife.

No matter how hard it was, you needed to turn your back on him from now.

“Wait,” he grabbed you by the wrist, and you nearly collapsed on the spot from how much you yearned for his touch. “Where did you get this?”

He was pertaining to the scratches on your palm. The ones you got when he rudely pushed you off. “It’s nothing,” was all you supplied, however, because he didn’t need to know. Rintaro would feel guilty and just feed you honey-like words to thaw the ice in your heart. Soon, you would be putty in his arms again if you weren’t careful enough. “Don’t worry about it.”

“Of course I worry.” He said it like this should be obvious to you by now, and you scoffed.

“Why? Because I’m not the perfect Princess you want me to be anymore now that I have wounds?”

Rintaro’s lips puckered out. “Because I don’t want you to get hurt.”

“You hurt me yesterday. Funny how fast your feelings change in the span of a night, no?” you grabbed your wrist before crossing your arms against your chest. “Is this how you always were? Kind one moment, ruthless the next? You put on so many faces and tell too many lies that I have no idea who I am talking to right now. So tell me—are you my husband who promised to take care of me and cherish me until death do us part, or are you the greedy Prince who manipulated me into marrying him?”

Rintaro does not respond. Instead, he manoeuvred around the cramped space of your bathroom and reaches for the first-aid kit on the top shelf. Your husband slowly unrolls the bandages before he takes your hand in his, touch butterfly like that you wondered if he was the same man who had been aggressive yesterday. Still, you waited with baited breath, unable to stop yourself from staring at him. And blessed he was with those hazel eyes who’d seen every ugly part of you yet stayed with you anyway—whether it was out of need or he actually cared sometimes to not mind—and that soft tuft of hair you loved running your hands to. Those lips who recited empty vows and kissed you like he meant it. That voice that made your legs quiver countless nights and now, these hands wrapping the bandages around your blistered palm with patience and grace you knew you had fallen in love with.

Tears sprung once again. Chest squeezing uncomfortably as you realized you still were, and still would, be hopelessly in love with Suna Rintaro. Heart shattering all over again when you began to accept your heart would be a chamber that hung him like an oil painting that never aged through the years. How your love would remain frozen in time along with his smiles, and you loved him so much you sometimes forget he did not love you at all.

He had someone else in his heart when yours cried out no one else’s name but his.

“Why her?” you croak out weakly, nursing your bandaged palm to your chest as you leant against the wall. Feeling your knees weaken little by little. “What does she have that I do not? Why did you love her...but not me?”

“I do not want to talk about it.”

“Why her, Rintaro?”

It was the first time you called him by his first name. The shock is apparent on his face, but Rintaro opted to shake his head before wrapping an arm around your waist. “We should eat first. Then, I will you tell everything.”

Breakfast, while not entirely comfortable, wasn’t as terrible as you expected it to be. It was difficult to stay mad at him when you were greeted by the staff who wouldn’t stop gushing about how your husband stayed up the entire night to cook for you. The said man only blushed in response, seemingly embarrassed and continuously apologizing for the mess he made in the kitchen.

Now, if Rintaro was on a mission to mess with your heart even more, it definitely worked.

All your anger dissipated as you ate the rice soup. The breakfast wasn’t anything flashy, but it contained everything you needed after a hungover. Bananas, some sliced apples, a light soup and some ginger tea to help ease your nausea. Such simple food, yet seeing as how Rintaro grew up with a silver spoon and never had to cook anything in his life before, your husband took multiple attempts to perfect the soup into a plausible taste. Not that you would ever tell him since compliments seemed far and beyond in this already failing marriage. But... you supposed, you could give him some credit. You appreciated the effort, and thanked the staff generously before you both decided to just walk back home and talk.

Greeting people as you go, your husband kept trying to hold your hand. For appearance’s sake, or because he simply wanted to have you close, you didn’t ask anymore. You shoved your hands deep into your pockets and led him into a field of dandelions—one of your favourite places as a child. The bright yellows mixing in with the lush green, along with the fresh breeze, and it would have been picture perfect.

You always wanted to visit here with Rintaro. Tell him some childhood stories. It was something you had been dreaming of around the third month of your relationship, but now that you were here standing next to your husband, you didn’t quite feel the same elation.

“This place is beautiful,” he cut the silence and faces you with a soft smile. “Imagine one day, our kids would run here with us—”

“Why are you doing this to me, Your Highness? Do you take pleasure in my suffering?”

“Princess, I—” he sighed, “Let me explain.”

“Go ahead. Tell me everything from the start and I might be kind enough to understand where you come from.”

And tell you, he did. He told you everything. From how they met, to how he had always felt this ‘pull’ with her and smiled to himself dreamily because gravity pulled him to her; they had this magnetic force that they couldn’t stay away from each other. He told you about the dreams he shared with her. The plans they made. He listed down every little thing he loved about her and remained unaware that you stood there furiously blinking back tears, because you were the wife, and you had never felt so unloved at the face of someone who proclaimed his undying affection for a woman who was not his. He reminisced about how it all went downhill when Iris married Kiyoomi, how they were so lonely that they just found home in each other. He couldn’t help it, he said, I just knew I needed to do everything to make her mine.

We were meant for each other.

And you? Who were you meant for? Perhaps, you were destined for this sick, twisted fate where you felt like the outsider, the third party, the side character, in a story that was supposed to be yours? He looked so in love. And you knew, because you mirrored everything he felt about her. You knew because you looked the same way as he does now when you were in love, and it’s not you—it’s never going to be you. It was never supposed to be you. All you could do was smile bitterly when your husband uttered her name like she had cast a spell on him. Pretending with whatever strength you had left in you to be fine.

“You love her that much you were willing to sacrifice me for it?”

“...I—”

“Did you ever think about how this would make me feel? How-How I welcomed you into my home and told you about my deepest fears and-and none of that had been real? Was there a single moment where you stopped to think maybe you were hurting someone else all because you wanted to be with the woman you want?”

“I never wanted to hurt you.”

“But that is the thing, Your Highness, you already did. You cannot undo what has been done.”

“I know that,” Rintaro stepped forward, only to be greeted by you keeping the distance bigger. The crestfallen look on his face nearly made you feel bad. “I do not expect forgiveness from you, Your Highness. Absolutely not. But if we could compromise on something—”

“What would we compromise on?” you laughed without a trace of humour, “I love you. I married you because I love you, I care about you, and I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you. You married me out of greed. You still wish to proceed with your plans which shows you truly do not care about me, so tell me, what is there to compromise about? I want my husband more than anything else, but that is the one thing you cannot give me.”

Rintaro shook his head. “No, no. I am still yours, Princess. Iris is not my wife, you are. You are the one who I will wake up to every morning, the one I will spend the rest of my life with. We can still do the things you wish for. Iris, she... she is not a selfish woman. She has always been kind enough to let me be with you for the greater good—”

You raised a palm in front of his face.

“Please stop talking.”

Was he defeated? No. Rintaro needed more than this blatant rejection of yours. If he had been that weak or gave up any easily, then he wouldn’t get where he was right now. But at this moment, you could have sworn he meant it when his shoulders fell and called out your name.

“Had we met earlier, I would have loved you first.”

“That just hurts me more.”

“I was, and am genuinely happy with you, my wife,” he reassured, but it didn’t stop making you cry. It didn’t ease the pain as Rintaro slowly encaged you in his embrace. Your tears staining his shirt and fists crumpling the material as you felt yourself die little by little. “Shh, Princess. Not a part of me regrets reciting my vows to you on that day in front of the entire kingdom. Believe it or not, but I adore you. I love listening to your stories and hearing you laugh, and-and you are kind. You are strong. You are an extremely beautiful and loving woman that I am the luckiest man in the world to have been your husband.”

“But you do not love me,” you cried harder, “You will never look at me the way you look at her.” When the Prince remained silent, so did you. He didn’t deny it this time—how you would never receive the same treatment as Iris. That fact alone had you pulling back to stare at your husband’s eyes.

“Does she make you happier than I do, Your Highness?”

Ignorance was bliss, indeed. If only you could turn back time and undo this moment where you stopped curiosity from getting the best of you, perhaps you would not be twice as heartbroken when Rintaro nodded. No hesitation in his features. Just pure love, and an ounce of regret and guilt from the way you slowly crumbled before him.

“Yes, she does. The Princess is my entire universe. I would be utterly devastated and lost without her.”

It felt as if the wind had been knocked out of your body. It became a challenge to speak, to feel the tips of your fingers as you stepped back one time, two time, three times until the distance was just as big as the hole he punctured through your heart. Now, you had enough. You had reached your limit, learned your lesson, been humbled to your place—and Rintaro had no intention of taking his words back.

He meant it.

He would lose himself if Iris disappeared from his life.

With that, you had no choice but to force a smile. “I understand,” you declared, wiping your pathetic tears because it hadn’t been an hour since you promised you would be stronger now. But luck was never on your side, and you still kept tripping and wounding yourself. “I...I would like to return to the castle, Your Highness. There is no need to extend this trip any longer than it should be.”

“We don’t need to return right away, Princess. There are still plenty of things we can do—”

“Please refrain from sharing any activities with me from now on unless it is bound by duty. No eyes are looking, so you have no responsibilities with me right now,” you sent him a pointed gaze. “I wish to return to the city, and that is final. Do not question my decisions as I will not interfere with yours.”

Rintaro’s lips flattened into a thin line. You couldn’t bear yourself to look at him anymore, so you walked away from him, salty tears cascading down your cheeks, and the wedding ring heavier than the weight in your heart.

From today onwards, you might not recognize yourself anymore.

None of the Princes and their wives questioned the sudden return to Inarizaki Palace.

When they saw you and Rintaro walk in with gloom faces, everyone shuffled to their feet and quickly packed their things. No words or explanations needed. This honeymoon had already ended on a sour note, and now it was time to return to the reality of royal obligations and duties. Duties such as keeping a fake smile plastered at all times when the supportive citizens of Inarizaki waved and cheered at the couples’ arrival. Atrocious obligations such as letting your husband place a possessive hand at the small of your back when the rest of his brothers welcomed you into the lobby, the youngest Prince bouncing at his feet at the sight of you.

“Back so soon, sister? Did you guys enjoy?”

You shared a quick, affectionate glance with Rintaro. “We did. I had the time of my life, but I thought it unnecessary to dilly-dally around in my hometown when royal duties await us all.”

“As expected of my sister. You are always so adept,” praised the marvelled Prince Tobio who had taken himself to looping himself to your arm. It left Rintaro awkwardly following behind as you were guided to your shared chambers, but you weren’t complaining. The youngest Prince was lively and brightened up your bitter days. “Say, would you mind taking me to Greenville someday when we are both free? I heard you had the loveliest manor there.”

“It would be my honour, Your Highness.”

“Please,” he beamed, and instantly, you were given a reason to endure this hell even longer. “Call me brother, we are family now. But ah, it is night time! I should let the both of you rest. Take good care of her, brother!”

Rintaro offered a nod. The both of you waited as Prince Tobio left the room in high spirits when the uncomfortable silence stretched, leaving you to scurry changing into your sleepwear in opt of avoiding your husband’s gaze. Once done, you let your hands roam over the cream pillars surrounding the edges of your king sized bed with a robin egg blue and gold palette. A golden chandelier with diamonds hung from the ceiling above the bed, the bed post textured with coral shaped indents. The same shade of blue hung from the windows. A large television right across the bed with a cream coloured cabinet lined with gold outlines—a perfect room for a man who would be sleeping by himself. Who, by the way, was already comfortably settled into the left side of the bed with his arm propped behind his head.

“Where are you headed?”

“Outside?”

“In your nightgown? Absolutely not.”

“In the drawing room, my Prince. I am not stepping out of our quarters dressed like this.”

“But it is time for bed.”

“Indeed, and I do not wish to share one with you when you and your mistress must have rolled around in it already. Good night, Your Highness,” you sent him a preppy smile, bowing deep before shutting the doors shut. A baffled Rintaro about to leave his bed the last thing you saw.

Hearing the doors close behind you, you practically crashed into the couch. You were beyond exhausted and your head still pounded from your endless crying—it was now time for a good night’s sleep. Not that it would be good, no matter how soft the cushion may be, because the palatial room did nothing but echo the loneliness residing in your heart.

Unbeknownst to you, Rintaro wouldn’t stop tossing and turning in his bed. The clock ticking got to his nerves until he was cracking open every book, tossing the television to random channels, and even swiping his fingers across the countertops to check for dust. He couldn’t sleep—not when his wife wasn’t beside him. This wasn’t how he pictured his marriage out to be; sleeping alone, with his wife intent on keeping her distance. Still, Rintaro thought, shouldn’t he be happy? You were not getting in his way. You were not particularly malicious to Iris on the way back home, or anytime after that, despite his confession that he knew wounded you. You simply ignored her existence, and now it was his turn.

Did you intend on pretending he wasn’t there too? Because Rintaro wasn’t having any of it. He would rather you hit him, scream at him, even call him a monster if it meant you looked at his way.

Pinching the bridge of his nose, Rintaro walked to the doors and prepared himself to carry you back to bed when he heard it—the sounds of muffled cries and nearly inaudible whimpers.

He didn’t know why his mouth tasted sour and bitter at the same time.

Rintaro had no idea why he stepped away from the doors like what stood behind it scared him, and slowly returned to the bed. The door acted as a barrier between the two hearts who unknowingly kept themselves up and awake until the sun rose the next morning—Rintaro with a heavy chest of guilt, and your heart gradually losing the spark it once held for him.

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herdelreydear · 10 months

Text

„xo xo“

pt.1

warnings: alcohol, smoking, modern!au, drummer!abby, basist!ellie, fem!reader

summary: after moving to a small town to be there for your best friend while she needs you , you start working at a bar. The lokal band that plays there every sunday seems pretty interesting after spotting a blond haired and pretty attractive drummer

{not proofread}

notes: I promise the second part is going to be more spicy, I think this is going to be a small series maybe a bit slow burn but maybe the next chapter is going to be nsfw idk yet :.) also i’m new here so i‘d appreciate reposts, likes or even comments so so much <33

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Things were going to be different this summer, you felt it. After a long winter it finally started to get warm again, and the sun felt so good. While blasting music through your headphones you walked towards the little bar your friend mentioned, hoping to find them searching for new workers.

Since you moved here you didn't really had the time to focus on applying to a new job, all that mattered was to be there for your friend. Dina was one of the people, you would do something crazy like that for.

Moving to a small town because she had just broken up with her boyfriend and being on the edge of an identity crisis you were there to support her. But because of everything being pretty spontaneous the time and money it'd take to find a new place wasn't something you had right now. Till you'd manage to do so, Dina let you stay at hers.

„stay as long as you want cutie!" was what she told you the day you arrived at hers. But god no you didn't wanted to ruin her privacy and personal space. Her apartment wasn't big, and you knew she didn't like sharing her place (that's why she never moved in with Jesse, her Ex boyfriend).

She wasn't satisfied with you having to find a new job just to afford living here and stressing about finding a place to live just because she wasn't stable enough to be on her own right now. But Dina knew that you would do nearly anything for her because she was always there for you too, through hard and rough times she never turned her back on you. You two kind of became each others family.

The little bar she mentioned was just about 10 mins away, and while you walked there you got to know the small town. Pretty old houses and lots of greens and gardens. Where you stayed before was very different from that. Dina lived with you before she decided to move here because of Jesse, and you couldn't afford it yet to visit her and now you're moving here anyways. God, Dina is lucky that you're pretty easy when it comes to moving around, some people might would've lost a good job with moving spontaneously. Not you. After moving away from your dad, you tried to work as much as possible to afford your apartment and the food for your two cats. From being a bartender to working as a cleaning force, you did it all and you didn't mind. At least you didn’t had to share a place with anyone but Dina after moving out from you dad’s.

The bar was really sweet, Dina just knew what you liked. When you stepped in a little bell rang, and the person behind the counter bar glanced a welcoming smile at you.

"hey! you're new here right?" she nodded in your direction and you came closer while looking around.

"yeah, is that so obvious?" in this town they probably all ready knew everyone's face. You gave her a little smile.

"Kind of, yeah" she pointed at a board that showed all the drinks and prices. You thought about what to order. "Just a small coffee, please" you answered counting your money. After you gave it to her you sat down at a barstool right in front of her. "I'm Cat." she held her hand towards you and you shook it lightly. "y/n" taking a sip of the coffee she just had put right in front of you. Tilting your head to the side, unsure to ask you started: „Do you guys..perhaps..need another hand?" She looked up at you "I'm sorry i don't want to bother but I kinda really need that money right now-" you brabbel faster than your thoughts can follow. Silence. She looks at you with a little smile. "you're lucky you're talking to the chef right now."

„Dina!“ with a grin on your face you shouted her name while entering her apartment. You heard music coming from the kitchen and as you came in you saw her in front of the kitchen counter. As always she looked as if she knew what she’s doing but that was just her confidence. Sometimes you really questioned how she managed to live on her own with those cooking skills. „hey“ she smiled and turned her head over to look at you for a sec. „Guess who’s gonna start working tomorrow“ holding back a big smile you walked over to her to look at what exactly she was cooking. „No way-„ she looked surprised. „oh yeah“ with a grin on her lips she turned over to hug you. „NO WAY!“ she repeated while hugging you excited. „Oh my god tell me everything about how you managed to get the job right away!“ you started telling her about the sweet manager that was pretty young for an owner and how open she was with helping you by applying to the job at her bar. Dina was really proud of you and rewarded you with the dinner she cooked. Surprisingly it tasted better than anything she ever cooked for you. You noticed how she changed since you last met her. But that wasn’t a bad thing. Better cooking skills, and she became so independent (you were an exception). You were happy that she broke up with Jesse after she told you how off their relationship became after being together for 2 years. Since she moved here to be with him all the time they started to notice that they just didn’t fit together anymore. „maybe it‘s time for a girl again“ Dina joked. Her last relationship with a girl didn’t ended that well either. You chuckled. Summer just started and you were both single, could be worse.

Time goes by, and after two weeks of working you settled in. Working at the bar was exhausting, but fun. This sunday was your first shift while a band would play. That meant: working all day and working late. But at least they maybe would play something you’re into? Dina joked about the band members and how she thought lokal bands always consisted of some old people that had nothing to do anymore. Great. A bit downturned you got ready that Sunday. While looking into the mirror you tilted your head to look at your face from different angles. Why don’t try something new? You normally didn’t wear that much make up, but foundation, mascara and a nude lipstick were your go-to. Maybe some dark red lipstick for today would make you feel more confident (you also thought of how you could get a bigger tip if you’d do that to be honest). Working at the bar your clothes had to be subtle so you mostly wore all black but comfy. Sticking to that tonight you wore comfy black jeans and a black top with lace framing your cleavage. Putting on your silver hoops and necklaces you felt complete.

„looking hawt“ Dina approached you with a grin. „So i’ll see you tonight when the gig starts right?“ you nodded. „Should I bring some food? I mean you’ll be already working hours when it starts..“

„No thanks Dina, but very sweet of you. I’ll take something from the store for the way“ you pouched a kiss on her cheek, teasingly knowing it’d leave a red kiss stain she’d be annoyed about and waved her goodbye.

Arriving at the bar you saw the band’s equipment already built up on the little stage across from the counter you’d be working. Nice, so at least you’d see something and it wont get boring working that long.

„Sooo in the band are Manny, Owen, Ellie and Abby“ you nodded, not really knowing what you could’ve answered. „Don’t worry you’ll get to know them over time, they had a break for the last couple of weeks but now they’re back and luckily playing for the Planet.“ (The Planet = name of the bar) „So.. what genre do they play?“ you asked while starting to wash some of the used glasses in the sink.

„hmm they most of the time just cover songs, I‘d say rock and metal because they love to cover classics from the 70s“ interesting. „and some other alternative sub genre, but don’t worry you’ll enjoy if you like hot men making music“ cat grinned and leaned over to you. You started laughing and shaking your head. „No not really, i’m on the other team.“

„girls? I like that. I think you’ll love the drummer and the basist then“ you raised your brows. „I’m gonna have to work cat, not crushing on some band members that’s something i’ll leave to you“ you chuckled and she just shrugged. „Well, I’ll definitely enjoy the show. By the way, don’t underestimate us. Just because it’s a smaller town, people from elsewhere come here too when they’re playing.“ Cat left and you were alone at the counter. No visitors yet, so you could relax. Listening to the radio, you hummed quietly while focusing on getting everything ready for tonight.

„They’ll soon start, why don’t you get a small break before the bar fills?“ Cat came by to check on you after some hours of your shift and you took the opportunity and went through the back door outside.

You were about to search for your cigs in your pockets, when a group of people came closer. Before you could care to look up a girl came closer. „You want one?“ a girl with long blond hair in one braid held a pack right in front of you, now you looked up. You smiled shyly and nodded. „Uh..Thank you, and sorry i forgot mine“ you said without being asked but you were nervous and it just came out. Gosh she was so pretty.. Her little smirk, her nose covered in freckles and her whole appearance seemed to attract you. After you took a cig between your lips she immediately took out a lighter. You looked up at her to look in her eyes while she lit it for you. You inhaled and took a step backwards to fully look at her. Exhaling. „Thanks“

„You work here?“ her voice was a bit raspy and her big hoodie hid whatever was under there, you could just imagine. The other people of here group circled around you two and you started to reckon who these people were. Not bad, even Dina would find them attractive and yet she didn’t date a musician. „Yeah I do, I’m new here though“ you smiled and the others started to greet you too. „Yeah I would’ve recognized you otherwise“ she grinned and while she exhaled the smoke she respectfully tilted her head to the other side.

„Nice to have you guys here, Cat told me about you. Seems like we should be honored to have you playing at the Planet“ you jokingly exaggerated a bit and they chuckled. „I’m Abby by the way“ she looked to the right „that’s Manny,“ pointed to the other guy „Owen. And that-„ she layed her arm around the girl on her left „is my girl Ellie“ they all smiled at you and you also introduced yourself. So, she has a girlfriend? Not that you really should take the first hot girl that seemed like your type that kind of works with you. Ellie was also more masculine, a thing you were most of the time attracted to. She was a bit smaller and less talkative then the blonde. Anyways, you should focus on your work first, dating comes last. Even though you were more then desperate. You needed to get laid soon our you’d actually just grab the next best lesbian that was down to fuck.

When y’all finished the smokes you walked them back into the bar, or they walked you in there. Next to them you looked so unintimidating it was almost embarassing. You walked back to the counter while they went to the set up across from you. Staring at them you didn’t notice how full it got and had to take some orders right away. While serving the costumers one of the guys, you forgot the name, started opening their gig.

God, it got so full you became a bit stressed, but when you saw Dina coming in you relaxed a bit. People started to move away from the counter and gathered around the little stage.

„hey sexy barmaid“ she squeezed herself through a group of men that just ordered, to get to you. „So no old men band, god for you“ you rolled your eyes. „And for you too right?“ she giggled. „yeah of course“ she sat on a barstool infront of you and glanced over her shoulder. „damn, they actually are surprisingly good looking..“ pouring shots for another costumer you nodded. „i know..“ she leaned back to you. „The brown haired one seems to be your type. Tatts, short hair?“ you shrugged, she just knew you to well. But she didn’t knew that your eyes were on the other girl only. Now, while thinking about her you tried to see her through the small crowd. She was the drummer, of course. You raised your brows, she had taken her hoodie off, god…you blushed embaressed. Her arms toned, and muscles flexed from playing the drums. A view you couldn’t deny to find very appealing. Hoping Dina wouldn’t notice your red cheeks, but the lights were dimmed and drawn to the stage.

„Am I right??“ Dina tried to get your eye contact. „hello bar momma i’m talking to you“ you snapped out. „Dina gosh let me enjoy the view for a moment“ you laughed and she ordered something. While mixing her a drink you two talked about how she needed someone to get over Jesse and how you needed to get laid. And coincidentally there was a group with potential right infront of you.

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y’all are welcomed to give any tips/ideas for the next chapters! I have some ideas in mind but maybe you guys have ideas on how to make things more spicy🐇

#abby anderson #abby tlou #sapphic #ellie williams #the last of us #abby x reader #x reader #dina tlou #tlou part 2 #tlou fanfiction #tlou #ellie x dina #yn #abby x fem!reader

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