#I was waiting for her to finally be vulnerable so when that amazing scene came and she was able to CRY and let herself break. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

lightlycareless · 9 months

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CHAPTER 35 IS HITTING LIKE ALL MY FAVORITE TROPES,, the ao3 outage earlier this week KILLED me right during my standard "rereading the latest chapter over and over" frenzy,,,

this one had me throwing my phone on my bed and covering my face w my hands like a flustered maiden. losing my fucking shit the entire time

the sudden "theres something going on that all the staff are whispering about" had me like,, what the fuck is going on,, is someone DEAD? and a momentary "HOW MANY MONTHS HAS IT BEEN SINCE THAT ULTIMATUM" and then its naoya's dumb ass getting himself sick. i'd be annoyed at him if it weren't for the incredible scenes this grants us later in the chapter

(and its also SO FUNNY *how* he got sick-- literally stranded in some cursed energy zone all pathetic and alone. just like my sad kicked dog description i keep using for him. he is embodying it fully and truly.)

when naoya's staff came up to y/n like "its about naoya's health we need you" i was like "ohh the drama is he gonna die without her there or something" and,, turns out thats exactly it he probably would've died from refusing to take medicine if she weren't there. glorious. hes so pathetic its unreal (affectionate)

THEYRE FINALLY ALONE TOGETHER AGAIN,, it feels like its been so long and it apparently has been for him-- feeling like its been centuries since hes seen her. ME TOO MF MAYBE IF YOU WERE LESS OF AN ASSHOLE WE COULDVE BEEN HERE EARLIER

"it feels like you could literally do just about anything with him and he wouldn't be able to stop it" - "you were sure you could control him" Y/N,, GIRL,, YOU WANNA TOP HIM SO BAD OOO YOU WANT TO DOM HIM SO BAD. IM CHEERING FOR YOU (she might've been thinking more about murder. but i know what i was thinking) that followed by the "holding the cup directly to his lips to make him drink" scene is killing me. im going insane for them.

she FINALLY gets to interrogate his ass and he CAN'T go anywhere or do anything about it this whole scene was AMAZING. we get so much added dimension to both of them with y/n finally getting to snap on him somewhat and say/ask all the things she's been hiding, and naoya finally showing a little bit of that vulnerability with the discussion about the records and his mother. there's SO much going on here and i can't WAIT to see how that's gonna unfold in the next chapter ft. all sorts of flashbacks

i would read like 35 more chapters of just these sick shenanigans going on tbh. naoya's pov during this kinda thing would be so interesting too-- how deliriously out of it is he actually? is he gonna be absolutely mortified at this behavior when he's more lucid? i could also imagine him pretending to be sick for wayyy longer than he really is just so y/n won't leave,,,

outstanding showstopping amazing. i cant wait to see whats next!

Hi!!!! AAAA sorry for taking a while to get back to your ask, however I must say that when I saw this pop up on my inbox I was going through somewhat of a sad moment, and this made me very happy :’) So thank you!! 😭❤️❤️❤️❤️

Now onto the juicy details…

I’m 100% aware that I’ve been writing nothing less than indulging tropes… AND I’M GLAD ABOUT IT HAHAHAH I’M NEVER GONNA STOP

I think I might’ve been a bit dramatic when writing the reaction from the staff. But after everything that happened… there’s no other way for them to react 😂 The never-ending drama in the Naoya-Y/N soap opera has them on edge, they saw this coming and was only a matter of waiting when it would occur.

It makes me wonder what Naobito’s opinion about this whole charade was 🤔 From disappointment towards his son, to amusement when hearing that Naoya has been incessantly calling for Y/N. He probably lurked around as close as he could to get a better look of what was happening, maybe even bringing some popcorn to enjoy the show. Y/N was right to assume that his family would’ve intervened to force her into aiding Naoya, although… not because they cared but rather because Naobito was tired of things being boring.

Omg… who does he ship Y/N with? Naoya or Naoaki? WTF am I even saying lmao 😂 I need to log off.

As for the timeline… please don’t ask me about it AHAHAH I feel like after all the things that happened, if I were to sit down and determine how much time has passed since the beginning of the story… it would probably be like 5 years or so lol —well, it certainly feels like it anyways. But I will set a time frame in the following chapters to give you an example of how long it’s been, if it’s believable anyways 😂 Thank god it’s fiction AMIRITE? (excuse my lazy writing 😭)

Anyways, the way he got sick is exactly as you described: overall pathetic. There really is no better words to say, serves to show how he’s slowly losing himself 💀😂 ah, poor Naoya, but can’t say he doesn’t deserve it. I wonder what he actually did in those missing days?

I’m very surprised y/n was involved at all for there’s no way the staff didn’t know of their tumultuous relationship. This more likely than not could’ve worsened his situation… and if she was truly vengeful she could’ve taken this chance to kill him and yet, they still had faith on her, believed she would somehow ignore all the horrible things he had done to her and do the right thing. And in that matter, they don’t deserve Y/N lol. Once again if she were a bit more unhinged, she could easily be a Tomie-type of character… but where’s the fun in that? (at least for what I have in mind, not gonna say that writing that kind of story isn’t intriguing hehe)

Well, the threat of her being forced by her in-laws lingered in the back of her mind, perhaps even her main motivator, but all things considered she decided to do so because, well, she’s not completely evil. She should’ve been a bit harsher… but well, that doesn’t really align to the values she was taught with.

Talking about the alone part… wow. It has been a while since we saw them together like that; like what, 10 chapters? Lol Still, if Y/N had been that unhinged she could’ve been like “I’m taking my ladies with me AND Naoaki for my well-being” and that would’ve murdered Naoya and his staff immediately. HAHAHAH Can you imagine that though? Still, I won’t say that doesn’t sound a bit ridiculous 😂 the whole family reunited in his room lol.

But yeah!! It’s been so long, and it’s finally happening… under relatively normal conditions where Naoya isn’t terrorizing her. It does make me wonder how their time at the ryokan during their honeymoon was like… I might write about it… some snippets here and there (or if someone wants to send in an ask of what they think happened heheh) anyways, her being in this position of power is a bit unnerving to her, and within reason. From being berated almost daily, to being in a situation where she can literally do anything and who’s gonna stop her?????

Well, Y/N isn’t that crazy like Naoya, but I’m sure she’ll make the most out of this situation anyways.

AS FOR THE TOPPING IMPLICATION…. Damn. I didn’t even think about it like that hahah I was out here imagining how “Y/N wants to beat him up, make him suffer, so he can get a taste of what she’s been through………….” And then you show me the other side of the coin where she might want to top him DAMN that’s an interesting perspective of something that might happen further down the road…. AHAHAHHAHA I won’t say anything more.

Either way, not that the aspect of “intimacy” has been brought up, for me those moments that Y/N was taking care of Naoya felt… well, intimate, if that makes sense. Probably a delusion from my side, but it’s the kind of domestic things I want to see happening between the two 😭 no more drama or fighting, just the two being in a healthy, happy relationship. Like Naoya coming back injured from a mission and Y/N tending for him because she cares for him, not because she’s being forced or because Naoya was acting stupid or whatever.

But we shall see, we’re getting somewhere after all :>

The highlights of this chapter would definitely be Naoya opening up to Y/N (although a bit, and when he’s not 100% him, but it’s something…) and Y/N talking (or more like demanding) to know about the records and why he’s acting like that… even though she doesn’t believe him that much lol.

NGL I’m excited for the next chapter, it’s going to be flashbacks that will certainly affect their relationship—something I’ve been wanting to write too! Like, I hadn’t said anything about Tomoko outside of Naoaki’s perspective, but what about Naoya?! What’s his relationship with her like? How was she during her last days at the Estate? And for Y/N, HOW DID MINAKO DIE? Oof, very interesting indeed.

The following chapter, whether for the worse or for the better, is necessary for their marriage. As well as his sickness :> We’re finally getting development for the two yall!!

Anyways, thank you so much for your patience and support! We’re slowly moving forward to the “good stuff” that I cannot WAIT to post!!! There’s also a few more tropes (I guess) that I want to introduce… some that I think are very obvious (of course, because I know what’s happening lmao) 😂 but I can’t help but indulge on them!!!! It’s like an addiction, I must… have… it.

Once again, thank you so much for being patient with me during this short break 🥺❤️ I hope you like the next chapters!! Take care, have a wonderful week, and hope to see you soon!!

#ask #ask series: first it hurts—#naoya zenin #naoya zen'in #naoya x reader #naoya zenin x reader #naoya zenin x your #jjk naoya #naoya zen'in x reader

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tamlinrose · 9 months

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Good Omen 2 Spoilers

Needless to say I’m devastated, obviously. The season was amazing, the writing, the acting, everything, and I was SO sure it was going to end with a drunken breakfast at the Ritz like Crowley. I was SO SURE they were going to kiss and happy music would swell and it was going to be all fine and dandy.

And of course I’m heartbroken for how It turned out, of COURSE I’m devastated that Aziraphale fundamentally missed the point that Crowley doesn’t want to be an Angel again, he doesn’t want to be a demon, he wants to be AZIRAPHALE’S.

Of course I’m so fucking sad that Crowley finally was vulnerable, and it came at just the wrong moment, the wrong time, the wrong wording to convince Aziraphale heaven can’t be fixed, because the thing is, Aziraphale is still brainwashed by the idea of Good. He is SO used to heaven being unkind that the second they throw him a bone he jumps, thinks “this is a chance for things to be different!” And is completely blinded by his own need to feel like a part of something bigger that he can’t see the truth, that they are manipulative and always will be, that if he didn’t have respect before he certainly won’t now, and most importantly That CROWLEY has never treated him like that, not once.

On the other hand, for all the people who are devastated and saying that they won’t rewatch, that they’re burning the bridge of their interest in good omens, that this is queerbait, it’s NOT. That’s your prerogative to stop watching of course, but the point is this is an UNFINISHED TALE. 6 episodes couldn’t cover the story, the overarching story, and this season didn’t have what would have been essential to Crowley and Aziraphale truly ending up together.

Crowley said it himself, Aziraphale WASNT THERE when they told him to shut up and die. He doesn’t believe heaven is as bad as it is because he hasn’t witnessed the true coldness up there in so long, and he’s NORMALIZED to the neglect and abuse he faces up there in a way many abused people are. He thinks that one bone is enough, that he can fix them, and he always would have felt that, which is why He NEEDS a personal arc where he realizes this on his own and stands up for himself AGAINST HEAVEN. THIS is his opportunity to do that. THAT is why the writers made him go back, he needs to know for himself before he can accept it.

THATS why Neil Gaiman is saying on his blog that he needs a season 3 to complete the arc. The writing timing of this falling out is intentional to keep the show alive to get to that point. If this tragic moment was left for Season 3 Ep 1 and they dined at the ritz like normal for Season 2 finale, there wouldn’t be any development we need for Aziraphale, and more importantly, if would feel like there was no need for a season 3. This tension is the writing worlds way of PRESERVING this show, and it’s frustrating yes, but that’s how things get renewed, that’s how Aziraphale gets the arc he needs, that’s how we get happy endgame Aziracrow, that’s how you rev up anticipation for the Second Coming, THATS how you write a story.

Also, it’s not queerbait. It never has been. They’ve always been in love, not even TALKING about the kiss here but about their complete trust in each other, their inside jokes, the DANCE SCENE, Crowley comforting Aziraphale after he lied to heaven. The symbolism between them and Maggie and Nina. (Nina also being in an abusive relationship like Aziraphale with heaven and needing TIME TO PROCESS before getting with Maggie, who will wait for her is totally mirroring the arc Aziraphale needs to have btw. Abused people don’t often just fall into healthy new relationships while still being entangled in their old ones mentally). My point is that if your argument for hating the ending is this was pulling the rug out from under queer fan base, think about all the creators who shoe in a gay relationship, kiss at the last second on the shows last episode, think about all the shows where subtext had to be enough, or where showrunners weren’t brave or allowed enough to make a relationship canon until the last second. This is the MIDDLE of the show (if everything goes well with Amazon which is out of Neil’s control). This has been explicit from the creators mouth and frankly the show itself for ages, even without a kiss. This is not queerbait, and sometimes relationships need space to be able to come back together in a truly fulfilled way, even queer ones.

Anyway that’s my rant, I have more, per usual, but this post is already long

#good omens season 3 #good omens season 2 #good omens season 1 #good omens spoilers #aziracrow #aziraphale #crowley #neil gaiman

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smkkbert · 1 year

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Time for a story - Sacrifice

“They are here!”

As soon as Emmy had called that, her younger siblings came running from wherever they had waited for the arrival of their father and youngest sister. Emmy jumped down from the kitchen counter and ran towards the door like the other kids. She was beaten in the race for the door by Millie though. She had reached it just a second earlier and tore open the door.

“Daddy!”

She leaped at him. Thanks to Oliver’s good reflexes and his strong arms, he caught her easily without letting go of the car seat that Mia was in. He even lifted her with just his one arm to kiss the back of her head before he set her back to the floor.

“And Mia!” Addie yelled and spread her arms widely while she was running towards her like she wanted to hug her. “Mia! Mia! Mia!”

“Pssst,” Oliver hushed her gently and pulled Mia’s baby seat behind him al little, so Addie couldn’t cuddle her baby sister, “Mia’s asleep, and she needs some rest.”

Addie stilled immediately, put her finger to her lips and imitated her father. “Pssst.”

Oliver winked at her, and Addie smiled back at him. She tiptoed a step closer and looked at Mia. Her hands stayed behind her back. She didn’t want to wake up her baby sister.

“She looks fine,” Addie said and lifted her gaze to look at Oliver, “right?”

“She is fine.” Oliver smiled. “She just needs a little rest, so we want her to sleep a little more, don’t we?”

“But won’t she be awake all night?” Tommy asked, frowning. “That’s why Raisa says we shouldn’t take naps.”

“That’s true.” Oliver tapped the tip of his finger against Tommy’s nose. “But Mia has had some exhausting days. She needs more sleep than she usually does. She will probably wake up later because she’s hungry, but she will also fall asleep again soon. Let’s grant her that sleep.”

Felicity, who had watched the scene from the door, smiled. Her entire body tingled. Finally, her family was reunited under their roof. It felt weirdly wrong when they weren’t coming together again for the night. With the two weeks that she and Oliver had spent at the hospital with Mia – Felicity the first, Oliver the second – it had been a while since they had all been together like that.

When Oliver’s gaze met Felicity’s, they both smiled at each other. The time at the hospital had been hard on them both. Seeing their baby that vulnerable was never easy. With Mia’s fear of strangers and her fear of abandonment, it had been impossible to leave her alone for even an hour. She’s sense if she was left and started crying until Oliver or Felicity were back. They had needed to split, so one was there for Mia, while the other was holding everything else together.

Nobody ever said it was easy.

“Now, let’s come in. Dinner is ready in ten minutes.”

“Can I take Mia to the crib in the living room?” Emmy asked.

“You can carry her there,” Oliver suggested, holding out the baby seat for her to take it, “but don’t take her out of the seat.”

“Alright.”

Emmy took the seat and turned towards the living room slowly. She carried the seat so carefully that it looked like she was holding a dozen of raw eggs.

“Make sure Hawk’s not too excited.” Felicity brushed her fingers through Emmy’s hair briefly. “Mia really needs some rest.”

“We will take care,” Tommy promised and followed his older sister alongside his younger siblings to the living room.

Felicity looked after them for a moment, feeling her heart fill with warmth. It was amazing how much the kids liked to take care of each other. They loved each other so much. It was a great gift.

Once the kids had disappeared in the living room, Felicity turned towards Oliver. He had closed the door behind him and approached Felicity now. He came to stand right in front of her and wrapped his arms around her waist. He lowered his face to touch Felicity’s forehead with his.

“I’ve missed you,” he whispered.

They had seen each other every day at the hospital, but it wasn’t the same as being home together. They hadn’t had much time with each other.

“I’ve missed you too.” Felicity leaned against Oliver and let her hands move over his chest. “And I can’t wait to fall asleep with you by my side tonight.”

Sleeping alone had been the worst of their separation. She had taken Hawk to bed with her. He had filled the space on the mattress, but the bed had still felt empty without Oliver. They weren’t sleeping apart a lot of times, so it had been a terrible feeling.

Oliver leaned his head down and brushed his lips against Felicity’s. What she had thought would be a gentle kiss turned into something more though. Oliver moved his tongue against hers gently and tightened his arms around her waist. Felicity hummed against his lips, straightened up onto the tips of her toes and moved a hand into her hair.

“You know what I can’t wait for?” Oliver asked as soon as their lips had parted.

Felicity smiled and moved her nose against his. She used her arms around his shoulders to pull herself even closer against him. She watched his face and enjoyed the way he smiled at her. His smile was soft and sweet, but there was something lewd in it.

“I have an idea what you mean which, coincidentally, works with what I had in mind.” Felicity angled her head, so her lips rested against Oliver’s ear. “Last night, I dreamed about what exactly we would do. We’d start with my lips wrapped around you and your hands in my hair. We will continue joint together with-“

“Okay, you need to stop,” Oliver said, taking a step back, “or I will not be able to wait until after dinner.”

Felicity chuckled, satisfied with the result of letting Oliver know about her latest fantasy. It was good to know that she could still turn him on just by verbally drawing an erotic picture in his head.

“I have to check on our dinner anyway.”

She winked at him and walked past him to the kitchen. Glancing at the timer, she saw that there were still seven minutes left for the pasta to bake in the oven. Since she trusted her eyes and nose more than a timer when it came to pasta bake, she opened the oven door a bit and sneaked a peek inside.

“Looks delicious,” Oliver said out loud what was on Felicity’s mind, “is that the pasta bake with salmon and spinach that the kids liked so much?”

“No, it’s a Caprese pasta bake with chicken and pesto.” Felicity closed the door of the oven, turned around and leaned back against the kitchen counter. “I handed Millie some recipes and asked her to choose. She wanted this one.”

Oliver nodded. “Sounds yummy which is good because I feel like I am starving. The food at the hospital is terrible.”

“Sounds like a cliché.”

“There’s usually something true about clichés, so I am not that surprised.”

Felicity cocked her head. “But I guess you already have something in mind to change that?”

“You know me well.” Oliver grinned and sat down on one of the bar stools at the kitchen island. “I used my time at Mia’s bedside well and worked out a concept to enhance the quality of the food that is offered at the cafeteria without an increasement of price. With some changes, I think the concept can also be used for schools.”

“You’ve been very productive.”

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “I guess that I just used my experience there as inspiration just like you used Mia’s issues as inspiration for your next project with Wayne Enterprise. Speaking of, how is that one going?”

“Surprisingly well to be honest.” Felicity went to the fridge, took a bottle of wine and poured each of them a glass. “Bruce has talked to some important doctors and medical engineers that we want to hire or involve in the project. He managed to make more of them commit than I thought he would which means that we can go into the next stage.”

“Which is?”

“We will meet our core team and discuss what direction exactly we need to take. With the bio-stimulant we knew what we wanted and how to achieve that. The concept was rather easy. This time it’s different though. We know what we want to achieve, but we don’t really know how. Neuro surgery and cardiac surgery are two very different things.”

Sipping at her glass of wine, Felicity realized how much she had missed this. Sharing what had happened during the day had always been an important part of their lives. They had texted and called each other, but it wasn’t the same. It was different when they were sitting here together and were able to look at each other.

Oliver cocked his head and smiled at Felicity. “What are you thinking about?”

“How much I have missed this.”

“So did I.” Oliver reached out his hand on the counter top and squeezed Felicity’s fingers. “I have missed this house and being here with you and the kids and just everything.”

“Which is why I guess that we should delay our plans for the night a little and maybe watch a movie with the kids before we put them to bed. I think a movie night together would be good for all of us.”

“I am in. One hundred per-“

When his phone started buzzing in the pocket of his jeans, Oliver stopped. He scrunched up his nose and sucked in a deep breath. Felicity knew that Oliver longed for a calm night at home with his family. It was what he needed, and it was what everyone else needed.

Unfortunately, life didn’t always give them what they needed.

“Heavy’s the head that wears the crown.” Felicity chuckled quietly and put her hand to his chest. “You should take the call.”

Taking a sip of her wine, Felicity watched Oliver pulling the phone from the pocket of his jeans and checking the name on the display. He frowned slightly and mouthed “Barry” towards her before he took the call.

“Barry, hey.”

Felicity continued watching Oliver’s face while he was talking to Barry. The way his frown deepened, and he looked at a spot at the wall with quite some focus told Felicity that Barry hadn’t just called to check how everyone was. He probably had work for Oliver to do.

“Mama?”

Seeing Addie coming into the kitchen, Felicity got up and approached her.

“What’s going on, Sweetie?” she asked with lowered voice and kneeled down in front of Addie.

“I’m hungry.”

“Dinner’s ready in a minute.” She winked at her. “Why don’t you get your siblings, so we can start as soon as the timer goes off.”

“Mia’s not in her crib.”

“Right.” Felicity tapped the tip of her finger against the tip of Addie’s nose and winked once more. “Tell Emmy to bring Mia with her. I think she should be with us while we are having dinner. That way she can listen to our voices.”

“Okay.”

Pleased with the answer she had gotten, Addie tripped back into the living room to get her siblings. Felicity got back up and turned to Oliver.

“I’m on my way.”

He hung up the phone and released a deep sigh that mixed with a growl. When his eyes met Felicity’s, he softened instantly though.

“Problems?”

“With some supervillain.” Oliver rubbed his hands over his face. “He asked for the team.”

Felicity perked up her eyebrows. “The entire team?”

Oliver shook his head. “No, I don’t think that’s necessary. I will go, and I will ask Tommy to come with me. I’d ask John, but he needs to take care of City Hall.”

John and Oliver were a great team at City Hall, and they were a great team in the field. When the team had grown and everyone had started their families, they had already worked in the field together less. They had both been the leader of their sub-teams. With the responsibility they shared at City Hall, it was even harder for them to go into the field together.

Still, Felicity could see that it wasn’t the only thing that bothered Oliver.

“We all have to make sacrifices for the things we try to achieve.”

“But it’s not fair that our kids have to make sacrifices for it.” Oliver shook his head. “We haven’t been together for almost two weeks. They need a normal night with us.”

“They understand why you have to be away so often.” Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “They understand it, and they accept it. You won’t have time tonight, but we can still do a movie night next week and even order pizza and buy all kind of sweets to make it even more special for them.”

Oliver might not be completely convinced, but he released a sigh of defeat and nodded his head in agreement. He knew he had to go and help their friend. If he didn’t and something happened to Barry, he wouldn’t be able to forgive himself.

“I’ll go upstairs and get my bag.”

“Are you leaving?” Emmy frowned, entering the room while still walking like she was carrying raw eggs. “Already?”

“Yeah.” Oliver sighed, walked towards her and kissed the top of her head. “Uncle Barry needs my help. Is that okay?”

Emmy nodded her head. “If someone needs help, you need to go. We will help mommy.”

“I’ll set the table!” Tommy exclaimed immediately, taking Millie’s hand. “You can help me.”

“I’ll feed Hawk.”

Addie walked towards the cupboards, and Hawk followed her immediately. If there was something he could understand, it was when he was about to be fed.

“I’ll carry Mia around some more.” Emmy smiled. “So she won’t wake up.”

Felicity chuckled about how busy their children were all of a sudden. She took a step closer to Oliver and wrapped both of her arms around his middle, so they could watch the kids together for a moment. They all had to make their sacrifices and given what was at stake they all did so happily.

* * *

@fannaz @promiseyoullbepatientwithme @bytemegeekette @felicity-said-just-in-case @phanseptiic @orangeisorange @mspotatohead14 @whentheheavenfades @emmaamelia95 @smoakingskye @seaolicity @ourwritinginvein @1022bridgetp @felicityqueenforever @leagueofolicity17 @yryssss @myhauntedblacksoul @sherlock44 @sinceriouslybea @olivyflavescentdeer @olicitys-castle @ofnothingcharming @vaelisamaza @smoakedandcharmed @alexisa1206 @florence-bubbles @addictiontelly @queens-of-arrows-blog @memcjo @hysterical-for-joshifer-blog @oswinelevenforever @olicitylovemaking @bandanab310 @mymusiclove101 @lynslogic @scarletqueen23 @olicityshipper19-blog @alex-wesley @unabashedlynerdypatrol @louehmysoul-blog @ligiapimenta @chattyyana @charlie-leau @coal000 @samcrowleys @ishippolivia @julianegomesqueen @malafle @miriam1779 @charlinert @melaux @ontheolicityship @myshipperlife @wrightainsley @lexi9515 @ladygreenwood @multi-fandom-crazy-fangirl @morinamel @mje-thomas @kebarry @canadianheartgirl @nannett2307 @almondblossomme @kathrynelizabeth89 @imdfabulous @mrt2501 @arsipaci14 @salasvia @brandis91 @cainc3 @morganmiguess @pr0fessi0nal-fangurl @iamisalima @nessafrancis-blog @jonhdiggle @niki-is-amazing @universed-posts @hopeful-warrior @senoritaswiftie @bellemmie @green-arrows-of-karamel @iheartarrow @olicityovereverything @oliverfel4 @olicity-in-the-heart @fullychippedcreation @geemarie @everything-but-normal-cat @myarroworld @tjmartinez @pleasantfanandstudent @j69confessional2 @scentedcolorpirate @icanica74 @tjmartinez98 @certainmentality50 @tatianadamaceno @ryelew @wildwillowzepplin @missafairy @letsplaymurde-r @lipizette @positivepiper @nuttymilkshakehologram @laksagirl-blog @turnupthemusicandscream @pumpernickle93 @onceuponanolicity @1106angel @jaspertown @fadinglands @morganashimi83 @mochababychristy @omglovechrissie @mariejr88-blog @thetaufactor @onceuponanolicity @speakandseethetruth @bri206 @aglasgo @geemarie @pineprincess @nerdgirljen @eternal-olicity14 @allyouhadtodowas-stay-stay-stay @lovelycssefan @tsseract @flowerandsunshine @dcnmarvelgamergeek @blondeeoneexox @monetsmark @bb-olicity @mashamarty @rulerofsilence @erika-amber @nothingmorethanmyotps @kayleenyc @tonto16 @olicityfluv @olicitea1990 @haahaaa2408 @pattid1 @faegal04 @24karatgem @wrldtravler @readerkas @olicity-beliver @greencoffeecups @snorlaxishere @sonothappening118 @rhizoneill @emeraldbutterfly16

(If you want to be tagged or untagged, just let me know. :))

#arrow #olicity #olicity fic #olicity fanfic #time for a story

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letsgofoletsgo · 1 year

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Gift for @jade-green-butterfly ! I think you’re really cool, and I felt inspired by your ship with Busker!

🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵

It was a warm, calm evening. The sun had begun to set, painting orangey hues across the sky. Birds chipped from the treetops, calling to each other in light, singsong notes. There was a slight breeze, causing the leaves to rustle gently.

This was such a scene that Jadie enjoyed relaxing in. After the bustle of the day, all the things she had to worry about running her sweet shop, she often came out to her backyard to unwind, sitting in the old porch swing on her lawn. She took a deep breath, feeling the fresh air in her lungs as she looked up to the sky. The clouds spiraled in different directions, now a lemon-like color against the sun. She felt a sense of peace, admiring the beauty of the sky above her. It felt like the world around her slowed, allowing her to just exist, to take in everything around her slowly. Finally allowed to collect her thoughts, she closed her eyes, thinking of nothing but the serenity around her.

“Hey there, love.” A voice spoke behind her.

Turning around, Jadie was met with Busker standing near the swing. He had his guitar around his torso, and a soft expression.

“Busker! I didn’t think you’d be done this early.” Jadie exclaimed.

“Me either, but it's such a lovely evening, I figured I’d enjoy it.” He explained. “I ain’t buggin’ ya, am I?”

“Of course not.” She smiled. “Come and sit with me.”

Busker did as so, heaving slightly as he sat on the swing. He took a moment to take in the scenery as she did, Jade admiring his expression as he did.

“So, how was your day?” He asked after a moment.

“Busy. I love working at the sweet shop, but it gets hectic sometimes, you know?” Jadie said.

“I hear ya. Must be tough managing all that shop stuff.” He commented.

“Yeah.” She shrugged. “But hey, it's worth it to do what I enjoy.”

“Agreed. I sorta know how that is, it ain’t all sunshine and rainbows being a musician, especially when you’re indie like I am.”

“Well, I know my talented guitarist is always up for the task.” Jadie smiled, causing Busker to blush. “Speaking of which, how is your songwork going?”

“Still smoothing the edges with my buddy, we’ve got a couple more songs to workshop before we can record.” He explained. “Overall though, I’d say we’re making good progress!”

“Good! I can’t wait to hear them when you’re done.”

“Heheh, I’d be happy to show you. In fact, I’ll let you hear them before we release them.”

“Awww, you’d do that just for me?”

“Of course! Anything for my sweetheart.”

Jadie giggled, feeling her heart flutter at the nickname. Busker felt his own heart skip a beat, a sense of warmness coming over him at her reaction.

“Er… You know Jadie, there’s this one song I’ve been working on by myself that I finished recently, and I was thinking I could show you?” He asked, a rare gentleness in his voice.

This made Jadie rather curious. “Sure.”

Busker moved his guitar so it was sitting on his lap. Jadie observed him adjust the tuning pegs, and noticed an uncharacteristic nervousness of his movements. What could have him acting like this? She looked at him gently, not wanting to make him more nervous with overbearing curiosity.

He took a breath, and began.

The smell of flowers in the Spring

The new beginnings that it brings

I see

The wonder in your eyes

The way your soul is so carefree

The way you shine effortlessly

I know

That you’re one of a kind

And I count my blessings everyday

That I was ever sent your way

Cause I look back at our history

And everything is clear to me

Cause I realize what you mean to me

One question remains to me

What would I be without you?

Don’t know what I'd be without you

The last strum reverberated with tenderness, Busker shifting his gaze to Jadie with vulnerability in his eyes.

“Busker, that… That was beautiful.” She said, voice awash with amazement.

“Heh, well, I suppose inspiration comes easy when… My muse is as wonderful as you are.”

Jadie’s eyes widened, repeating his words in her head. “You… You wrote that for me?”

“I did. I know it may seem like I’m always caught up in my music, but I mean it when I say I don’t know what I’d be without you, Jadie.”

Jadie didn’t speak for a moment; she felt overwhelmed with so much emotion. To some, it may have been seen as a small gesture, but she could feel the love and care put into the song, the passion in his voice as he sang. No one had ever done something like this for her.

“I uh, I’m glad you liked it. I know it was rather short, but I still put effort into it.” He admitted sheepishly.

“Are you kidding? I loved it!” she beamed. “It was so wonderful, I don’t know what else to say.” An elated, almost giggly tone about her.

He. smiled. “Well, that’s all that matters to me.”

With a flood of warmth and love in her core, Jadie leaned against Busker, wrapping her arms around him. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” He returned the embrace.

Once again, the two found themselves admiring the nature around them. But instead of doing so alone, they enjoyed the moment at each other’s side, grateful that they had the other in their lives. As nice as the world around them was, they felt complete when they had each other.

🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵

(Also, I did a cover of Buskers song! I’m not e best singer, but I hope it helps you visualize it ^^. If it doesn’t show up, dm me and I’ll show ya)

#writing #selfship writing #gift writing

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gurugirl · 9 months

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Part 5! Can we talk about the roller coaster you took us on from part 1 to the final part (and so fucking glad you're not gonna just leave us with that ending - I need more of these two like I need air)??

I'm sick over how much I love these two. Harry is so hot and so sweet and so - what? What is he in this story that's so appealing? I just need him. If I could have a man that was this vulnerable, so available, so kind hearted, so eager, not afraid to put himself out there. This man doesn't exist. We want a man that is so sure of himself that he doesn't mind looking like a fool and he knows he's right the whole time and doesn't give up.

The smut was delicious as always - guru your smut excels in just about every way. The way you describe not only the actions but the scene around them, the smells the sounds, the feelings, internal thoughts. It's so immersive.

I was gonna come here off anon to tell you what I'm about to say (I normally don't go on anon) but I don't want any other blogs seeing me say this and knowing who I am when I say this...

No one. And I mean no one does smut and feelings like you. I mean I've read some really good smut and some amazing well-written stories but your ability to write a scene while making it dirty and hot is unmatched by anyone. I just needed you to know this.

In part 4 I was so upset that it ended the way it did. The angst was exactly what was needed in the story, though. How could they actually have a sweet and ideal little story that was all rainbows and smiles the whole time? They couldn't! So you did the story right by making part 4 so angsty.

And then starting of 5 with the angst, moving into the club scene and more angst with a touch of a moment I thought things would turn around but Marla to the rescue 😅 The vacation in Greece was needed and I love the jealousy that came out. Love that Harry was determined and the way you ended it with the two of them at the villa while Leo was passed out and Tyler was out with that girl he met. Phew. That whole thing with the songs you picked to showcase some of the emotions. The way he grabbed her and told her she needed to tell him she wasn't into him and she couldn't 😩 My heart. The emotions and the feelings were tangible.

Then of course their I LOVE YOUs??? The sex? Getting "caught" sort of!! I wonder if Leo heard? I cannot wait to know more. I want to see some follow up on that and just more of A Good Boy Harry and YN so bad.

My favorite couple ever. My favorite story. My favorite Harry. My favorite blog. I love you, guru.

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

I read this over and over again last night (was not a good night for me last night and this made me feel better seeing your thoughts on the series).

Honey, you really went all out with this feedback. I loved writing this series and to have anyone enjoying it this much just means the world to me. You are fabulous and kind to come here and share with me this kind of feedback.

AND?? I love that you feel that way about my smut scenes and writing but I have to say, I am most definitely not the best there is but if you insist that I am who am I to argue with your opinion? I've seen better writing for sure but it is something that is subjective so I'm highly flattered and feeling so warm and bright all over after hearing this.

I cannot even tell you enough what this means to me. This is so special to me and I will not soon forget this feedback and your kind words to me and about my writing in general. Literally over the moon reading this.

Thank you so much, baby. Thank you for reading and taking the time out of your day to type this love letter to me and give me your opinion and thoughts. I'm flabbergasted. Totally in shock from reading this.

Thank you 💕

xoxo

#ask #a good boy feedback

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spideyspeaches · 3 years

Text

Heart made of glass ↬ t.h

A/N: Beta read by the lovely @hollandcrush !! <3<3

Request (Summary): can you please write one about Tom, who is on the filming process of cherry and has some emotional problems because he feels that his character is already part of his life, so he comes home very angry and in a bad mood, so he just snaps and creates a big fight with the reader and just says things that he obviously didn't meant, you know very angst, and at the end just very fluff.

Hope you like this anon! Lemme know your thoughts heh <3<3

Warnings: breakdowns, slight vomiting but it’s not graphic. I’m not in any way romanticizing or sexualising breakdowns.

WC: 2k+

Pairing: Tom Holland x Reader

Masterlist || Taglist

Tom was an ambitious guy. He took his roles seriously, no matter what his character was and who he played. It was an admirable trait, the way he both enjoyed his work and worked hard to earn a high place in such a place as Hollywood.

You always took pride in how amazing and accomplished your boyfriend was, your heart swelling whenever you heard his name being mentioned in events and interviews. You enjoyed how he tried to diversify the movies he worked in.

("I've been playing the friendly neighbourhood Spider-Man for so long, it's about time I play someone different now." He once said in a Jimmy Kimmel interview. You were watching from the audience, smiling as the audience roared in affirmation.

"Well looks like you took quite a big leap from playing a superhero." Jimmy said, smiling at the audience with his paparazzi smile.

You knew the question was scripted, quite harmless, but you still noticed how his shoulder stiffened, his smile not wavering once.

"Well yeah, I used to be a superhero and now I'm a heroin addict." He joked, winking at the audience as he ran a hand through his nearly hairless head.

He cried himself to sleep that night, burying his face in your chest as you shushed him. )

It always worked in his favour, with the incredible support his family and fan base provided. And he was always so humble about it.

Filming Cherry, however, was way different than he thought it would. With filming Cherry came consequences that he didn't necessarily like. He knew what he was bringing on himself and his family when he was first introduced with the script.

(Contrary to popular belief, he didn't actually give out spoilers, it was just small promotional stunts that kind of took over as his reputation to spoil minor details.)

The process was intense, getting into the mindset of "Cherry" was taxing, and people were beginning to notice it in him. He was more restless, tugging at his non existent curls when he thought no one would notice.

He was more clingy, more appreciative of your body and you, letting you know that there was no sexual intent behind his acts of caressing your waist at random times. You didn't notice the change in his behaviour.

He had always been like this, watching you with the most gratifying gaze a man could muster, his pretty brown eyes like globes of whiskey, staring at you with a muffled expression. You didn't notice.

There had always been a cutting edge to his voice, you knew and adored it. Behind the British actor who played Spider-Man, he was your Tom. Your Tom who gave you forehead kisses and baked cakes with you and made silly playlists that reminded him of you and you of him, your Tom who worshiped the ground you walked on, your Tom, your Tom and your Tom.

(Sometimes you envied that he was an actor, so good at hiding any emotions he felt, it came easy to him, just another fake emotion like he was a face behind the camera.)

He was never aggressive towards you. Never. Even on tough days, he was soft, caring and understanding to the point where it made you mad, immediately making you feel guilty. He worked so hard and yet here you were, blaming him for being nice, never standing up for himself.

"Uh, Tom, Tom stop, wait." You grunted, pushing his shoulders as he scrambled away from you at your discontent.

You held his face, his breath hitching, hyperventilating as he tried to get himself together.

Ever since he had started filming Cherry, he had been away from you. And now that you were finally here, he had been all over you, making love to every inch of your skin, like it was a holy grail he had to find, caressing your warm skin under his fingers making you shiver as his nimble fingers wandered. It was the intimacy, sexual and quasi-sexual, that made you realise, that there was something wrong.

Sex- it had been a constant in your life other than Tom. But of course, you didn't live on it. It was but a fuel that strengthened your relationship, it was about discovery and showing your vulnerable sides. It was a reminder of the coffee dates and baseball matches. It was loving, gentle and raw, like a gentle breeze caressing your face.

But this, this was different. And you noticed. This, what you had been doing, it was fucking. It was aggressive and needy and it felt good, but at the same time, it felt different.

"Baby?" You asked softly, trying to meet his eyes in the dark lit trailer. It was late, way past filming times, the only time you got to see his vulnerable side.

You should have been in his hotel room, but you were in his trailer instead. All alone in the all encompassing darkness, it made your heart stutter beats.

"Baby speak to me. What's happening, who's doing this to you?" You ask once again, holding onto him firmly this time, his squirming frame making you loosen your hold. You didn't care that you were naked, he had already seen it all.

Fiddling with the rough sheets, he huffed a heavy breath. And that was all it took for the dam to break.

"Tell me how do you feel baby, you're starting to scare me." You urged. All you got in response was his muffled sobs. Pulling him forward, you let his head rest on your bare chest, rivulets of tears sliding down your warm skin, almost burning you like acid, his tiny hair tickling you, a very contrasting feeling.

"I can't do it. I can't take it anymore." He sniffed, wrapping his strong arms around you, shivering at the contact. It was a cold night in Cleveland, and you were naked and he was crying. You were berating yourself for not noticing.

"What can't you take anymore?" You hold him, tracing circles on his buzz cut hair, just the way you did when he had his curls.

"I feel like I'm becoming him. I don't like it at all, I try and try but I can't." He sobs, shoulders hitching with each sob. You felt your heart break, the sounds of his cries sending daggers into your skin.

How could you have not noticed? The lively sunshine of a man was almost an empty shell. The interviews with former drug addicts had been excruciating for you, pity, disgust, sympathy and every other sinful emotion swirling in your mind.

You couldn't believe that you hadn't thought about Tom, of what an effect it would have on him.

"Bub, listen to me, carefully," you said, shushing him as he continued to look at you, teary eyed and red nosed, snot dripping out of his nose,"you listen to me. You're strong and resilient and nothing like him okay? He's not you. You're Tom Holland. You're brilliant and brave and amazing okay?"

"But I don't feel that way!" He said, his aggressive stance surprising you, "he's- he's…"

"He's what?" You asked, a little too impatient. Muttering a sorry, you rub your palm on his cheek, kissing the soft, moist skin.

"I don't feel so good." He croaked, getting up suddenly, making a run for the washroom. You rushed after him, watching him as he heaved into the toilet. Rubbing his back, you muttered affirmations, curling besides him as he sat on the ground, his back to the cold wall.

You got up to switch on the lights, feeling his hands tugging yours, a soft "stay" coming out of him.

"Better?" You asked, feeling him now against your collarbone.

"I shouldn't be this affected, this- this isn't fair. I'm overreacting, I'm sorry I worried you baby I swear I didn't mean to-"

"Shh, Tom first of all, you're not overreacting okay?" You smiled, kissing his nose, moving towards his brows and his forehead, "It's perfectly reasonable. The role you're playing...It's not exactly picking daisies. Fuck you're playing a heroin addict Tommy, a broken soldier with PTSD, a breakdown was inevitable. It only shows that you're human."

"Really?" He smiled, it looked more like a grimace, a plea for reassurance.

"Yes, really." You said, booping his nose, eliciting a giggle from him,"now, you better go to bed mister, you have an early shoot don't you?" You playfully scolded, kissing his lips, laughing as he carried you bridal style.

"Tomorrow will be better." You whispered, kissing his eyelids, already closed, chest moving rhythmically as you counted his pulse, making sure he was completely asleep before slipping on your clothes, covering him with the thin quilt.

***

"Is everything okay on set?" You asked casually, watching the crewmates work tirelessly in the daylight.

You were standing next to Ciara on a prop jeep, fiddling with the water bottle held in your hand.

"Hmm, as okay it can be with two people playing drug addicts." She shrugged, looking at you with a small smile.

"Are you okay?" You asked, turning to give her your full attention, remembering your boyfriend's breakdown yesterday.

"It gets… intense at times. Some scenes are hard to play, but we're okay. Mostly." She answered, taking your water bottle and chugging the water.

"I'm not a therapist, but you can talk to me, you know?" You smiled, holding her shoulder as she gave you a bashful smile.

"It's been tough on Tom. He's more aggressive, nearly had a breakdown during a scene." She said.

"Yeah, that.. that happened yesterday too."

"It was time, a person can only hold so much right?"

"Yeah."

You pondered her words, wondering if you could do anything to curb this.

"I think I need help." He said one day while you were eating dinner. Harry, who was sitting next to you, looked up from his plate, giving you a knowing look before clearing his throat.

"I'm gonna get some water." He said, waving awkwardly at you and getting up. You took that as a cue to scoot closer to Tom, running your hands through his camel hair.

"That's very brave of you hun, asking for help." You smiled, kissing his cheek softly. You felt him smile, sliding closer to you, holding you by your waist.

"I learnt from the best." He muttered in your hair, kissing your forehead.

You felt his love that day, felt the way he ran his smooth fingers on your waistline, sliding across your thighs with care and softness you hadn't felt in a while. He was healing. It was a process, it took time but it happened.

***

You were walking across the library, his hand in yours, your hearts beating in silence.

"How was your appointment?" You asked, shivering in the cold air. You rubbed your palms together, bringing your jacket closer to your chest, huffing the cold air.

"It was good, much different from what the media portrays. She even showed me this meme she thinks you would like, look." He said, bringing out his phone to show you the saved meme.

You laughed at his eagerness, kissing his lips as a final gratification.

"Well it looks like you're having a great time. You have another scene left to do today in the evening so we better scram." You reminded him.

You always did that, remind him of his schedule, reminded him to take a breath when he felt like he was drowning. You reminded him of home and what he had to look forward to.

"Why can't we have a lazy day today?" He whined, kissing your neck, making you giggle as it tickled.

"You know you can't do that hun, you already took three days off." You snickered, poking his sides.

"Well that sucks. I just want to spend my day with my girl, is that too much to ask?" He smiled, kissing your forehead, one hand holding yours, swinging back and forth, the other holding a large cup of coffee in a tight grip.

You reached to loosen his fingers, taking a sip, slurping loudly, making him laugh. You decided you liked this laugh much better, it was breathy and free, a melody to your ears.

You noticed how he was more relaxed and back to being that ray of sunshine. Back to being your Tom.

Thanks for reading! also as a side note- here’s a similar fic @itsallyscorner !!

#tom holland x reader #tom holland x reader fluff #tom holland smut #tom holland x reader smut #tom holland x actress!reader #tom holland x you #tom holland fluff #tom holland angst #spideygirl writes

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peterbarnes · 3 years

Note

For the blurbs I saw you were open! So a angel!reader x Natasha Romanoff would be nice :) thanks even if you don’t do it! Have a nice day!!

Masterlist

The floor rumbled underneath your feet. You would've thought it was an earthquake had you not been in a building thousands of miles above the ground. You had always imagined the Red Room to be underground, as secretive as possible, not a huge institution floating in the sky.

It's a wonder these idiots haven't been caught yet. But I guess being a man with a lot of money does that.

On the more positive side, it had made it easier for you to slip in undetected. You flew in under the jet Melina was piloting, your large, white wings brushing against the bottom of it every now and then.

Now, you were trying to stay upright as half of the building exploded and rapidly catapulted towards the ground. But as the floor crumbled beneath you until all you saw was the white of the clouds, you were forced to resort to your wings. You glided down the hallway until spotting a large window at the end. You picked up speed, feeling the harsh wind against your wind, before colliding with the window. The glass shattered into various pieces and, miraculously, you came out unscathed.

The scene before you looked as if it was out of a nightmare. The once bright, bold, and blue sky was now ruined with dark debris.

"Where are you, Nat?" You mumbled under your breath, scanning the surrounding area for the redhead.

Eventually, you spotted her above you, on a part of the Red Room that had not yet collapse. It was a tarmac, holding just a single helicopter. You spotted Dreykov in his navy suit being ushered onto the vehicle by several of his male guards. And not far behind him was your girlfriend, her vibrant red hair flowing behind her, braids slapping against the side of her face as she ran.

You quickly started to fly over to where she was as she climbed up the side of the helicopter towards the blades.

"Nat! What are you doing?!" You exclaimed.

She held her staff in her hands, watching as you flew closer to her with each coming second.

"I love you!" She shouted back. You could have sworn you saw tears leaking from her eyes. But Natasha rarely showed vulnerability, let alone on missions. Usually, those moments were saved for quiet and private spaces where you were the only person around.

"I love you too! What are you doing? Wait- Nat, don't!!"

Before you could stop her, Nat had jammed her staff into the blades, causing them to malfunction and explode. She was blown back by the impact and hurtled over the edge of the tarmac, joining all the debris in their journey towards the grass below.

It's odd, how the worst moment of someone's life can occur in a matter of seconds. Too short for someone to react effectively, long enough to traumatize all the people involved.

She had already fallen a good few meters below the tarmac before you kicked into action, flying as fast as you could towards her flailing figure.

You briefly felt a piece of debris, a wire, scrape against your face, but adrenaline was rushing so heavily through your bloodstream that it didn't phase you. Your only concern was saving the girl that you loved.

You were closer to the ground than you wished when you had finally caught up to her. You scanned her face, trying to see if she was okay, but she never looked back at you. Her eyes were shut closed, fully unconscious. Behind her, you saw the ground grow larger as you came closer and closer to it. You would survive the fall, you were an angel, after all, a being of supernatural origins. But Nat couldn't. And it was too close for you to break effectively- the impact would be the same. So instead, you wrapped your wings around the girl you were holding, not a patch of her skin showing, and you braced yourself.

You and Natasha hit the ground with a large thud, the grass scratching against your body, even causing feathers to fall off. When you finally stopped rolling, you took in a deep breath, trying to gain back what had been knocked out of your lungs. You started coughing as well, trying to grasp onto any air you could find.

"Easy, easy. Breathe" you heard behind you, as a soft hand rubbed down your back.

Once you had calmed down and regained your breath, you turned your head to where the voice had come from. Dark brown eyes stared back at you, boring into your own. You gave her body the once over to make sure she didn't have any injuries other than a few minor crashes. And of course, she didn't have any. It always amazes you how Natasha manages to come out of potentially life-ending fights without needing anything other than a few Ibuprofen.

"Your okay," you wheezed, wrapping your arms around your girlfriend. She squeezed back, and your wings slowly wrapped around her. She always loved when that happened, she said it felt like two hugs in one.

"That was so stupid, Natasha," you continued. "You should've let me done that. I don't have to worry about falling to my death, unlike you."

"No," she whispered, refusing to break eye contact with you. "Dreykov's my past. I had to do that... face my own demons."

You nodded softly, rubbing your hands gently up and down her arms for comfort.

"I know. And I'm proud of you- I just got scared."

Natasha pressed a soft kiss to your cheek before resting her forehead against yours.

"Fly us out of here, my angel?”

"You got it, darling."

#natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff #black widow x reader #black widow #scarlet johansson #natasha romanoff fluff #natasha romonova #black widow x you #natasha romanoff x you #natasha romanoff x y/n #natasha romanoff imagine #black widow imagine #florence pugh #yelena belova

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riddlecrux · 3 years

Text

Why rejection leads to the endgame: Rowaelin and Elriel comparison.

This meta is based solely on textual pieces of evidence that can be found through the whole ACTOAR and TOG series written by SJM. My observations come from the text and what was given to us, the audience, by the author of the book. This post is going to be about two very prominent scenes that occur to the main characters and how they are played in the books, setting-wise but also plot-wise. Of course, a small warning: this is strictly pro-Elriel meta, so if it isn't your cup of tea you are in the wrong place. Also: SPOILERS FOR TOG!

I would like to start this meta with a short preface about how I am going to approach the subject. The things I will be looking into are setting, wording, and emotional attachments. (With a sprinkle of speculations).

We will begin with Rowaelin and how the rejection scene developed. The plotline setting is after a very tense situation, which was confronting Arobynn.

Queen of Shadows, pg. 321

Rowan was done waiting. (...) The lamplight glinted off the combs in her hair and along the golden dragon on the dress.

Emphasis on: - hair - light, and how it glides across combs of Aelin hair - "glinted"

Also worth mentioning is how Rowan finally overcame his inner battle. He became impatient.

Azriel POV, pg. 1

Azriel couldn't stop it. (...) he found himself leaving the room. Entering the foyer. (...) and there she was. The faelights gilded Elain's unbound hair, making her glow like the sun at dawn.

Emphasis on: - hair - light, and how it lightens Elain hair - "gilded"

Again, we have a male who is questioning his inner feelings and after an imminent mind battle, he decides to move and goes towards a place when he meets up with a female.

Queen Of Shadows, pg. 321-322

She half turned toward him. (...) The look in her eyes—guilt, anger, agony—hit him like a blow to the gut.

(...) and though she tried to hide it, he could see the fear in her gaze, and the guilt.

Rowan can read Aelin without words. Just one look and he knows exactly what she feels or what hides behind her words - which often are laced with lies. Yet, he, Rowan was able to always see beneath the false facade - even before they were told about them being true mates.

Azriel POV, pg. 2

Lie. Well, the second part was a lie. He didn't need his shadows to read her tone, the slight tightening of her face.

Elain's large brown eyes flickered, well aware of all that. Just as he knew she was well aware of why Azriel so rarely came to family dinners these days.

Azriel, just as Rowan can easily deduct lies underneath Elain's words. Him being a shadowsinger and spymaster could help him in knowing the truth, yet we have an emphasis on the fact that he didn't need his powers to realize and catch Elain's lie based on her tone and facial expressions.

Queen Of Shadows, pg. 322

He watched her throat bob as she swallowed.

Azriel POV, pg. 2

He watched her swallow.

The same imagery, similar wording. Both males are focused on the females' emotions and their nervousness/trepidation.

Queen Of Shadows, pg. 322

She rested her head against his chest, the tips of the bat-wing combs digging into him enough that he eased them one at a time from her hair. The gold was slick and cold in his hands (...)

Emphasis on: - Aelin initiating physical contact - piece of jewelry - golden color - Aelin's hair

Azriel POV, pg. 2-3

"Put it on me?" His head went quiet. But he took the necklace, opening the clasp as she exposed her back, sweeping her hair up in one hand to bare her long, creamy neck.

The golden necklace seemed ordinary -- its chain unremarkable.

Emphasis on: - Elain initiating physical contact - piece of jewelry - golden color - Elain's hair

Queen Of Shadows, pg. 323

She huffed a laugh that might have been a sob and wrapped her arms around his waist as if trying to steal his warmth.

He flattened his hand against her waist, his fingers contracting once as if debating letting her go.

We have Aelin seeking Rowan's touch, she is the one who pushes on the physical line between them. It's important to note that it's her constantly assessing Rowan, trying to close the distance between them. She's acting on her feelings and a need for closure.

Emphasis on the wording used by SJM: - "flattened his hand (...)"

Azriel POV pg. 3

Elain shivered, and he took a damn long time fastening the clasp.

Slowly, Elain pivoted into his touch. Until his palm lay flat against her neck.

Emphasis on: - "until his palm lay flat (...)"

In this setting, we have Elain who, once again, closes on the distance between her and Azriel. Just like Aelin she chooses to move along her feelings - which are obstructed from the reader's point of view due to the text being singular POV. It is her who slowly builds up the courage and makes Azriel touch her. Settle on her skin.

Queen Of Shadows, pg. 323

She waited for him to pull back, but he just stared at her—stared into her in that way he always did. Friends, but more. So much more, and she’d known it longer than she wanted to admit.

Carefully, she stroked her thumb across his cheekbone, his face slick with the rain.

Aelin realizes her feelings. She comes with the terms of their friendship and its possible development - both she and Rowan started out on the wrong foot, yet they formed an amazing friendship. They built their relation slowly, surely with many heartful moments that bordered on the line of friendship and something more.

Emphasis on: - Aelin "stroking" Rowan's face

Azriel POV pg. 3

It had never gone this far. They'd exchanged looks, the occasional brush of their fingers, but never this. Never blatant, unrestricted touching.

Azriel's fingers lingered at her nape, atop the first knob of her spine.

Letting them brush the side of her throat, savoring the velvet-soft texture.

As in the Rowaelin case, Elain and Azriel also built their relationship from a friendship. It was formed during the very dark period of time on Elain's behalf - just like it was for Aelin's. Both Azriel and Elain found comfort with each other, they both started to enjoy the company of the other - sitting in comfortable silence. Yet, we have an idea that this friendship slowly started to bloom into something riskier, more emotional. Both, Azriel and Elain already had their first love ripped away, never fulfilled, and ending in a painful manner. And for the first time when we are inside Azriel POV, it confirms that they balanced on this thin line for a while.

Emphasis on: - Azriel "brushing" Elain's throat and nape

Queen Of Shadows, pg. 323

It hit her like a stone—the wanting. She was a fool to have dodged it, denied it, even when a part of her had screamed it every morning that she’d blindly reached for the empty half of the bed.

Emphasis on: - realization of desire - mornings in the bed - desperate search for Rowan in the sheets

Azriel POV, pg. 2-3

Prayed she didn't understand the shift in his scent. He had only allowed himself these thoughts in the dead of night.

(...) a headache powder he kept on his nightstand at the House of Wind. Not to use, but just to look at. Which he'd done every night he’d slept there. Or attempted to sleep there.

Emphasis on: - desire - night and bed - looking at the gift from Elain on his nightstand

Both scenes and paragraphs signalize that both Aelin and Azriel fought with their newfound feelings. They were realizing that the friendship was slowly turning into something more - a feeling of desire to not only be close to the other person but also a desire to close the distance between friends and lovers.

Queen Of Shadows, pg. 324

She lifted her other hand to his face and his eyes locked onto hers, his breathing ragged as she traced the lines of the tattoo along his temple.

His hands tightened slightly on her waist, his thumbs grazing the bottom of her ribcage. It was an effort not to arch into his touch.

Azriel POV, pg. 3

(...) his thumb sweeping in long strokes along the side of her throat.

But Azriel just stroked her neck again. Elain shuddered, drifting closer.

Emphasis on: - constant engaging in physical contact - touching vulnerable parts of the other person - answering to the touch

Queen Of Shadows, pg. 324

“Rowan,” she breathed, his name a plea and a prayer. She slid her fingers down the side of his tattooed cheek, and—

Azriel POV pg. 4

“Yes" Elain breathed, like she read the decision. Just this taste in the dead of the longest night of the year, where only the Mother might witness them.

Emphasis on: - how the last word before the almost kiss is breathed - "religious" themes such as comparison to Rowan's name to the prayer - Mother (a "religious" figure) being present during this intimate scene between Elain and Azriel

Queen Of Shadows, pg. 324

Faster than she could see, he grabbed one wrist and then the other, yanking them away from his face and snarling softly. The world yawned open around her, cold and still.

He dropped her hands as if they were on fire, stepping away, those green eyes flat and dull in a way she hadn’t seen for some time now. Her throat closed up even before he said, “Don’t do that. Don’t—touch me like that.”

Rowan rejected Aelin in a brusque manner - and it wasn't necessarily because he didn't want to engage in expanding their relationship past the friendship. Rowan at this moment still lacks self-reassurance about how he should feel after Lyria. He is scared. It is something different than the feelings that restrained him from the kiss.

Azriel POV, pg. 4

Rhys's voice thundered through him, halting him mere inches from Elain's sweet mouth.

His stomach twisted as he pulled his hand from her hair and stepped back. Forced himself to say, "This was a mistake.”

We have Azriel who rejects the kiss because of Rhysand. It was not on his own terms. It was an order of his High Lord that involuntarily stopped him from kissing Elain.

Queen Of Shadows, pg. 324

There was a roaring in her ears, a burning in her face, and she swallowed hard. “I’m sorry.”

“I didn’t mean—” She backed away a step, toward the door on the other side of the roof. “I’m sorry,” she repeated. “It was nothing.”

Azriel POV pg. 4

She opened her eyes, hurt and confusion warring there before she whispered, "I’m sorry."

He shook his head, unable to stand the bleakness he'd brought to her expression.

In both scenes, it's the female that apologizes. The one who initiated physical contact. Aelin apologizes twice, meanwhile, Elain is rendered speechless and hurt - and it's Azriel who assures her that it is she doesn't need to apologize. However, Elain is left alone without an explanation and Azriel can't stand seeing her like that.

Both scenes are built in a similar manner - we have friendships border lining on a thin line of something more. Both Elain and Aelin are the ones who initiate physical contact and are the ones who are "rejected", left hurt, and confused. Rowan and Azriel are battling their self-hatred and feeling of unworthiness that is very sound in both of their POVS. There is a lot of things that contribute to the rejection - especially their feelings. Rowan and Azriel feel the romantic pull towards their loved ones - they know that desire and their feelings are reciprocated. Yet, their inner struggles are in the way of fully accepting the fact that the female they yearn for is able to accept them.

More parallels:

Queen Of Shadows, pg. 322

He’d almost fallen to his knees when he’d first seen her earlier tonight.

Azriel POV, pg. 3

He'd beg on his knees for a chance to taste it.

Both males are on the verge of falling to their knees in front of Aelin/Elain. They are ready to submit to their loved ones.

Queen Of Shadows, pg. 324

(...) understood that though she’d seen his eyes shine with hunger—hunger for her—it didn’t mean he wanted to act on it. Didn’t mean he might not hate himself for it.

In this chapter in Queen Of Shadows, we are presented with dual POV, both from Rowan and Aelin so it's easier to see what Aelin had felt when she was rejected. She tells the audience that she was aware of the fact that Rowan exhibited a desire for her. Furthermore, we have another instance of Aelin being able to understand Rowan without words. She knows that Rowan feeling lust for her might have resulted in him hating himself for that because of what had happened with Lyria.

Azriel POV, pg. 2

Just as he knew she was well aware of why Azriel so rarely came to family dinners these days.

We are obstructed from Elain's point of view and her understanding is explained by Azriel. He knows that Elain understands him. It's an important thing to remember since their friendship was built on the comfortable silence in which both of them bask. Elain and Azriel, just like Aelin and Rowan understand each other without words.

Queen Of Shadows, pg. 337

He hated it. Hated that he couldn’t reach her when she was that person. Hated that he’d snapped at her last night, had panicked at the touch of her hands. Now she’d shut him out entirely. This person she’d become today had no kindness, no joy.

Azriel POV, pg. 2-4

(...) Azriel had needed to stay by the door the whole time because he couldn't stand the sight of it, the scent of their mating bond, and needed to have the option of leaving if it became too much.

He shook his head, unable to stand the bleakness he'd brought to her expression.

Both Rowan and Azriel don't want to hurt their significant other. They battle their inner demons, their inner self-worth problems while trying not to put the weight of it on Aelin and Elain. Rowan has his mind troubled because he, at this moment in the books, is still burdened with what had happened to his "mate". On the other hand, we have Azriel who can't bring himself to be in the same room as Elain and Lucien due to their bond. A mate that Elain doesn't want. Azriel's reaction to the mating bond is also very strange - he can see it and scent it. Which I believe should be very telling if we're taking true mate/second mate theories into consideration. So, overall the problem of both males stems from the notion of "mate".

Queen Of Shadows, pg. 345

Even now, he honestly couldn’t decide if he was amused or enraged by Rowan’s words—Don’t touch me like that—when it was obvious the warrior-prince felt quite the opposite.

Azriel POV, pg. 3

He needed to know what the skin of her neck tasted like. What those perfect lips tasted like. Her breasts. Her sex. He needed her coming on his tongue --

Rowan and Azriel want to indulge in their desire for Aelin and Elain. Both of them weren't able to do so because of the "rejection", yet we are presented with the fact that even the rejection doesn't mean anything as long as both males feel completely opposite to what they had told during the refusal scenes.

Queen Of Shadows, pg. 348

Her scent hit him as she unbound her hair and nestled into the pile of pillows. That scent had always struck him, had always been a call and a challenge. It had shaken him so thoroughly from centuries encased in ice that he’d hated her at first. And now … now that scent drove him out of his mind.

Azriel POV, pg. 3

Her arousal drifted up to him, and his eyes nearly rolled back in his head at the sweet scent. He'd beg on his knees for a chance to taste it.

Emphasis on: - the scent - how it affects the male

Queen Of Shadows, pg. 348

They were both really damn lucky that she currently couldn’t shift into her Fae form and smell what was pounding through his blood. It had been hard enough to conceal it from her until now.

Azriel POV, pg. 3

Azriel's cock strained behind his pants, aching so fiercely he could hardly think. He prayed she didn't peer down. Prayed she didn't understand the shift in his scent.

Both males explain to the audience that their desire and lust were and are something they are battling as well. Rowan and Azriel are anxious because of their own problems with self-worth that they are struggling to keep as a secret.

Queen Of Shadows, pg. 348

He’d seen her naked before—a few times. And gods, yes, there had been moments when he’d considered it, but he’d mastered himself. He’d learned to keep those useless thoughts on a short, short leash. Like that time she’d moaned at the breeze he sent her way on Beltane—the arch of her neck, the parting of that mouth of hers, the sound that came out of her—

Azriel POV, pg. 3

He had only allowed himself these thoughts in the dead of night. Had only allowed his hand to fist his cock and think about her then, when even his shadows had gone to sleep. How that beautiful face might appear as he entered her, what sounds she'd make.

Emphasis on: - keeping the desire to himself - imagery of the female body - the sounds/moans

Queen Of Shadows, pg. 348

She was now lying on her side, her back to him. “About last night,” he said through his teeth. “It’s fine. It was a mistake.”

Azriel POV, pg. 4

His stomach twisted as he pulled his hand from her hair and stepped back. Forced himself to say, "This was a mistake.”

I think this is self-explanatory. The same words, similar situation. Rejection followed by a declaration of it being a mistake when the truth is that both couples are yearning for each other and want to be with one another.

Queen Of Shadows, pg. 349

The desire hadn’t been what shook him at all. It was just … Aelin had driven him insane these past few weeks, and yet he hadn’t considered what it would be like to have her look at him with interest.

Azriel POV, pg. 3

Her arousal drifted up to him, and his eyes nearly rolled back in his head at the sweet scent.

So close one deep breath would brush her breasts against his chest. She looked up at him, her face so trusting and hopeful and open (...)

Rowan and Azriel didn't even think about the fact that their desire could be reciprocated- and more than lust they were shocked that Aelin/Elain would look at them with interest, longing, hope. They weren't ready to acknowledge the fact that they weren't alone in this spiral of emotions and feelings.

Moving forward we have the acceptance stage and romantic moments for Rowaelin in Queen Of Shadows. Of course in the case of Elriel we are limited to an extra chapter, however, there are still very prominent similarities in setting and wording.

Queen Of Shadows, pg. 378

“Aelin,” he breathed. Not in reprimand or warning, but … a plea. It sounded like a plea. He lowered his head to her exposed neck and hovered a hair’s breadth away. She arched her neck farther, a silent invitation. Rowan let out a soft groan and grazed his teeth against her skin.

He let out another low groan, answer and confirmation and request, and the rumble echoed inside her

Azriel POV, pg. 4

“Yes" Elain breathed, like she read the decision.

Azriel's hand slid up her neck, burying in her thick hair. Tilting her face the way he wanted it. Elain's mouth parted slightly, her eyes scanning his before fluttering shut. Offer and permission. He nearly groaned with relief and need as he lowered his head toward hers.

Both couples operate without words. In the case of Rowaelin we have: - a plea - a silent invitation - an answer - a confirmation - a request

In the case of Elriel we have: - an offer - a permission - a decision - a relief - a need

The same setting, very similar description, and usage of words. As I was saying, in the case of Elain and Azriel relationship we are obstructed from Elain's point of view due to the content being a bonus chapter. Yet, we can draw a comparison between both couples. Why? Because SJM structured both rejections in the same way. Rowaeiln's rejection leads to a relationship, later to a discovery of being true mates. Is it a coincidence? From a writer's point of view and an avid reader - I don't believe so. She structured both rejections, in the same manner, using very similar vocabulary and even the familiar setting. In the case of Elriel - Azriel's "rejection" is what essentially builds a start for their relationship in the next book. We also have to remember that in Elain and Azriel situation we have:

- a mate - political background - forbidden romance - compatible powers - blood duel - connection to Koschei SJM gave us a setup for the premise of the next book which we know is Elain's. Azriel and Feyre's POV focus on her, but we know that it's one couple per book. Which perfectly aligns with Elriel and their rejection and pining. In SJM universe such rejections as the ones presented are used to further develop a couple, not to bring it down. The parallels are evident and if you are thinking that she doesn't use foreshadowing and she doesn't focus on details I would recommend rereading both series and see that SJM is an expert in foreshadowing - even the tiniest bits of it come out through the series.

That's why in the cases of her HEA couples rejection means endgame.

Queen Of Shadows, pg. 379

“This changes things,” she said, hardly able to get the words out. “Things have been changing for a while already. We’ll deal with it.”

#elriel #pro elriel #elriel meta #pro elain archeron #elain and azriel #azriel x elain #acotar meta #rowaelin #tog

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hanoella · 3 years

Text

A Matter of Time (2/2)

Pairing: Bucky x healer!Reader

Word Count: yikes 7.3k

Warnings: Angst Angst Angst. Mentions of death. Reference to Eternals 👀

A/N: Wow! I'm so happy everyone likes it! I like to get gorgeous with it haha. Hopefully, I'm not overdoing it.

Prompt: Believing they're about to die, Character A confesses their feelings for Character B before they pass out.

Tag list? I guess this is where I would put it? :) - @mischief-siriusly-managed @itsthemaree

@skyewardolicitycloisdelena91

---

You opened your eyes to a black room. No, not a room. There were no walls. You glanced down at your hands. You could still see them, so it wasn’t dark, just… black.

“Well, hello.”

You spun around and saw the source of the voice.

A serene, beautiful woman who had long dark hair and dressed in a green tunic addressed you.

“What has brought you here, young one?”

You took a moment to process your surroundings before you answered.

“I’m not even sure where ‘here’ is. The last I remember is…”

You trailed off, furrowing your brows, and blinking slowly as the memories start to flood back in.

“Ah… Am I dead?”

“Not quite. Though it does look like you are very close.” The woman says, peering to the side.

You followed her gaze and suddenly you were looking upon your own body, wrapped in Bucky’s arms. Startled, you gasp and step back. Looking around, you were back in the mountains by the Quinjet. Nobody seemed to notice you, even though you were right next to… yourself. Bucky was kneeling on the ground, holding your listless body to his chest. You looked away from him to take in your surroundings. Steve was kneeling next to him while the rest of the team was standing. Vision was comforting an anxious Wanda, while Sam and Natasha were getting a stretcher out of the jet. Clint was warming up the engine. Next to him was Tony, who was radioing into the compound’s medical center.

You turned your head back to Steve as he set a hand on Bucky’s shoulder and started speaking.

“Buck. Buck. You have to let her go. We have to get her somewhere where they can help her.”

Bucky only held onto you tighter, tears still dripping onto your face, leaving clear streaks in the blood.

“She’s dead Steve. There’s no pulse. I can’t find a pulse.” His voice hoarse, barely there.

“Friday said there was still brain activity. You know her body’s different, she could still survive. But only if we get her help. Helen’s on her way to meet us at the compound. She’ll be in good hands.” Steve said, gently loosening Bucky’s grip on you. As Nat and Sam came over, he gently lifted you out of Bucky’s arms and set you on the stretcher. They took you back to the jet, Bucky eyes trailing after you, the rest of his body unmoving.

“C’mon Buck. Let’s get going.” Steve said, offering his hand.

Bucky said nothing but accepted his help, hoisting himself up and walking slowly towards the ship with Steve’s arm on his back, guiding his soulless body.

You watched the jet take off before turning back to the woman. She was standing in the same place, watching you curiously.

“What’s happening here?” You asked, shock wearing off and confusion growing ever stronger.

“Well,” She started, clasping her hands together, and pondering the best way to put it.

“I’ve been alive long enough to see many generations of life go by. I have seen the same tragedies, wars, and evils repeat themselves endlessly through history. One thing that never fails to amaze me, though, is the beauty that manages to survive and thrive amongst it.”

Suddenly, you were in a charred landscape. Looking around, you recognized it as one of the first missions you took with Bucky. It was on the coastal countryside of Japan. You were both sent to follow up on a lead for a major weapons dealer. The mission had been simple: find the hideout and report back.

Unfortunately, they must have been tipped off to the fact that you were looking for them and burned their hideout, along with the surrounding plant life. You watched as Bucky and your past-self walked out from behind you. Startled again, you could only watch as the memory played out.

---

“Ah, what a shame. He didn’t have to burn down the trees with him.” You said sorrowfully as you picked up a charred ginkgo branch.

“It looks old. Burned down before we set foot in the country.” Bucky said, assessing the scene.

You stayed silent, putting down the branch and picking up the remnants of a bird’s nest that was underneath. Bucky watched you from several feet back. It took him a while to warm up to people and he had only ever seen you in passing. He knew that your apartment was down the hall from his in the compound but that was it. The only reason you were even on this mission together was that he spoke enough Japanese to get by while you knew the area from visiting previously.

“There’s nothing here. We should go back to the city and check in,” he said, looking around to double check the area before settling his gaze back on you.

You half-heartedly hummed in response, now putting your palm down on the ground. Bucky look at you quizzically as you paused, seemingly focusing on something.

“Some of these tree roots are still alive.” You said, perking up.

You set down the bird’s nest in your other hand before also placing that palm on the ground. Taking a deep breath, you slowly exhaled as a ring of soft light formed around you. You breathed in again, the light becoming brighter. Bucky took a step back and shielded his eyes. You exhaled, sending the ring of white light out from you. It went several meters before dissipating. When Bucky lowered his hand, he saw that several trees that had been scorched were growing back to perfect health. The white bark and bright yellow leaves stood out sharply against the ash and soot. You got up, slightly out of breath, and looked up at the tree in front of you. Slowly, a smile came upon your face. You closed your eyes for moment, taking it in before turning your head towards him.

Just then, the wind picked up and pushed the clouds out from in front of the sun. A ray of light filtered through the trees onto your face and suddenly Bucky was breathless. He watched as your chest rose and fell, the strain outlining your clavicle where a sheen of perspiration had developed. You were still smiling in accomplishment, the irises of your eyes shimmering in the sunlight. Gingko leaves that had been shaken off in the wind floated gently down, some landing on your gleaming hair before sliding off the silky strands.

You watched yourself walk back over to the bird’s nest and bury it in the fresh fallen gingko leaves. After taking a moment to honor the lost life, you stood, brushed the dirt from your knees and continued on. Bucky broke from his trance-like state and cleared his throat before walking in the direction you went in.

---

Seeing something in your peripheral vision, you turned to see the woman crouching to pick up a stray gingko leaf in the ash.

“One thing I’ve noticed amongst the ash,” she said in her light English accent before standing up and twirling the leaf slowly by the stem, “-is you.”

---

Bucky felt as if he was drifting through the actions. The jet was unbearably silent during the never-ending trip back to the compound. At some point Steve had put his hand on Bucky’s shoulder but he didn’t notice until it was gone. Endless possibilities were running through his head and yet he could not focus on a single one. It was agonizing.

When the jet landed, emergency medical staff, as well as Helen, met them on the runway. Helen relayed orders in Korean while her staff whisked her out of Bucky’s sight. He tried to follow after them, but Nat grabbed his arm and slowly shook her head no. When she spoke, her voice sounded more vulnerable than he had expected.

“Let them do their work.”

Bucky swallowed and looked over at Steve. Steve nodded in agreement and Bucky felt his shoulders drop.

“You need some rest, Buck. C’mon.” Steve said, patting him on the back and walking him to his lodging.

When Bucky closed the door behind him, he put his back against it and sank to the floor. He was exhausted. Everything had happened so fast, and he felt it to be overwhelming. He was starting to fixate on the stickiness of the blood and sweat, the exhaustion in his muscles. Taking a deep breath to center himself, he got up and walked to the bathroom, turning on the water to warm it up. He chucked his clothes directly into the washer before stepping under the warm water. He let it wash over him. He closed his eyes and moved so that the stream of water ran over his face.

In the darkness of his own mind, he relived holding you in his arms. Suddenly, the warm water felt like your blood against his skin and he snapped his eyes open, bracing himself with one hand against the wall, the other wiping his face off. He tried to slow down his breathing and counted the breaths, trying not to hyperventilate. Finally, calming down a little, he turned the hot water knob back to its original position, waiting for the water to reach freezing before quickly finishing the shower.

Dressing in a plain tee and sweats, he sat on his bed. No matter how firm the mattress was, he always ended up on the floor. He hadn’t chucked it for two reasons, the first being that he hardly had any possessions. The second reason was that you had come by once with a book you had mentioned.

---

Hearing the soft knock on his door, Bucky was hesitant to answer. The footsteps leading up to the door hadn’t been heavy enough to be Steve. He slowly walked over to the door and cracked the door open. It was you. You met his eyes and then lowered your gaze nervously, adjusting your grip on the book in your hand.

“Bucky? Hey, sorry to drop by unannounced. I just had that second book I was talking about. You finished the first one right?”

“Uh… Yeah I did. Come, on in.” He said, opening the door completely. He palmed through his hair nervously as you walked tentatively in.

“Sorry about the mess.”

“Oh, it’s no problem. Sorry for the intrusion.” You say, glancing around.

Your eyes brushed over the empty apartment. It was furnished with the standard set that it came with. Aside from a set of keys on the counter and a stray plum on the coffee table, there were no signs of life.

“I don’t think you can have a mess if you don’t have stuff to make a mess with.” You said bemused. Behind you Bucky chuckled nervously.

“Haha… Ah. Yeah.”

There was silence before you turned around.

“I’m sorry. This is weird. I should’ve just waited to give you the book at the next mission or something.” You apologized. Yet, you didn’t move.

Bucky backpedaled.

“Oh no, it’s not that. I’m sorry. I just don’t get a lot of… visitors.” He trailed off.

You met his gaze before your lip twitched upwards. A bubble of laughter escaped your mouth before he started chuckling as well. The tension was broken.

“Well, I’ll just leave this here.” You said, starting to leave the book on the coffee table.

“That’s fine. Uh, did you want the first one back?”

“There’s no rush-”

“I don’t mind. It’s just on my shelf.” He pointed down the hall. “I’ll grab it real quick.”

You watched as he walked down the short hall into his room. Still holding the book, you waited a moment before slowly following walking down the hall as well. When you peered into his room, you saw him standing in front of a bookshelf with several rows filled. You took a step inside.

“Ah, so this is where you keep your stuff. You might live here after all.” You joked.

Bucky chuckled as he moved aside to make room next to him for you in front of the shelf. He was still scanning the shelves for your book. You let your gaze drift across the titles, most of which were classics.

“Making up for lost time?” You asked, glancing up at the side of his face.

“Something like that.” He responded, bending down to check a lower shelf before pulling your book off of it.

He handed it to you, and you exchanged it for the new one.

“So,” you said, leaning against the side of his bed, “How did you like it?”

“I liked it.” He responded.

Bucky looked at you and saw your slight head tilt asking for more details. He cleared his throat and thought for a moment.

“Well… There was this one part that reminded me of the time I went with Steve to…” He started, sitting on the bed next to you. You hopped up next to him.

You listened to him as he retold his experience at the world fair. Going back and forth, your conversation flowed smoothly until it had gotten later than either of you had realized. At some point you had convinced him to read the first chapter of the second book.

“No pressure.” You said, flopping back so you were laying down across the bed, holding up your phone to scroll through the news to pass the time.

Bucky started reading the book, overly conscious of the fact that you were waiting on him. When he sent a quick glance your way though, you were nonchalantly scrolling. Eventually, he got absorbed into the chapter. Quite some time passed before he realized he was just reading the rest of the book. When that happened, he looked over at you.

You had dozed off waiting for him. At some point, you had taken your shoes off and grabbed the blanket he used off of the floor where he normally slept. You were curled up on your side, feet tucked away and mouth slightly open. Bucky stared for a few moments before closing the book and looking at his watch.

12:47 AM.

He blinked in surprise. You guys had talked for a while he guessed. Leaning over, he gently nudged you awake.

“Hey, I’m sorry. I got caught up reading. It’s almost 1 AM.”

You hummed groggily in response, rubbing your eye with one hand while pushing yourself up with the other. You squinted at the light of your phone as you checked it.

“It’s totally fine. I’m sorry I fell asleep. I am such a terrible guest.” You chuckled sleepily, standing up from the bed and picking up your shoes.

“Nah, you weren’t so bad.” Bucky joked.

You just smiled at him.

“Well, thanks for having me. I’ll get out of your hair now.” You said, shoes in hand as you walked started walking towards the door to his room.

He got up and followed you to the door. He held it open for you as you stepped out. Turning around you smiled sleepily at him.

“Goodnight.”

“Goodnight.” He replied.

He watched as you walked down the hall in your socks. You reached your door and punched in the code to your apartment. Looking down the hall at him, you waved as you opened your door. He waved back and you smiled one more time before you disappeared into your room. Pausing a moment, he looked around to see if anyone saw you leaving his room so late. With nobody around, he was in the clear. He sighed in relief and closed the door, walking back to his room. He noticed the first book that you were supposed to take back sitting on his nightstand. He touched the cover gently, pausing a moment before picking the second book back up, starting right where he left off.

---

Bucky reached over to pull the book you had left off of his shelf. He ran his hands over the indents of the golden lettering in the leather-bound book. Opening it, he looked at the sticky note that you left inside the cover.

Here’s that book I was talking about. First edition. Enjoy! :)

While looking at the crooked smile you had drawn, a knock on his door interrupted his thoughts and he stalled a moment before getting up to answer it. Opening the door, he was met with Steve, freshly showered and holding a bottle of Buck’s favorite whiskey.

“Thought you might want some company.” He said with his classic side grin.

Bucky wordlessly moved from the doorway and let him in. Steve walked past and sat on the couch, setting the whiskey down on the coffee table. Grabbing two glasses from the kitchen, Bucky settled down next to him. Steve poured a healthy portion into one of the glasses, handing one over before sitting back with his own. Swishing the liquid in the glass, Steve breathed in the aroma before sipping on it. Bucky decided on downing the entire drink in one go.

“Woah slow down there, the night is young.” Steve joked.

“C’mon Stevie. You know it doesn’t do a thing.” Bucky said wistfully, examining the empty glass in his hands. “I wish it did.”

Steve scanned his eyes over Bucky’s expression before turning back to his drink. A beat passed as he sipped once more before speaking.

“You care for her.” More of a statement than a question.

Bucky paused before admitting it out loud for the first time.

“… Yeah.”

They sat in silence before Steve sat forward, resting one arm on his knee while using the other to grab the bottle.

“In that case, let’s get you another drink.”

---

The night inched by; The amber liquid slowly drainin from the bottle until the last of it was in their glasses. Wordless, yet comforting. The sky brightened as the first rays of the sun kissed the morning dew, turning the landscape a stunning orange. Steve’s mind wandered as he watched the sky change color. Many a morning, he watched the sun rise on a battlefield as if nothing had disturbed it the day before. It’s what sustained him through sickness, war, and losing Bucky. It sustained him through his sacrifice as he plunged into the sea. It sustained him when he learned that he woke up in a new era, missing his dance with his best girl.

Clearing his throat, he set down his empty glass.

“What’re you going to say when she wakes up?”

“You mean if she wakes up.” Bucky said, his focus still on the drink in his hand.

“You should tell her how you feel. Life is unpredictable, especially in our line of work. I’ve never seen you care so much for anyone, Buck. Not back then, and not since you came back. When she wakes up, and you get this second chance, tell her. She cares about you too. Be with her. Enjoy it. You deserve to be happy.” Steve said, ending his speech quietly as he tried to remember the shade of red Peggy’s lipstick was when he last saw her on that runway.

Bucky glanced at Steve from the side, feeling the regret that had emanated from his voice. He stayed silent a moment longer before nodding his head slightly.

“I will. Thanks Steve.” He replied, laying his hand on Steve’s shoulder.

“Always. ‘Til the end of the line, pal.”

“The end of the line.” Bucky echoed.

Steve’s phone chirped, breaking the solemnity. He reached into his pocket and checked the message on his home screen.

“Helen has an update. C’mon.” Steve said, as he stood up from the couch.

---

“This has been a particularly unique situation.” Helen stated, swiping her tablet screen to look at more information. Bucky and Steve stood in front of her, outside of the room they were keeping you in.

“We ran many tests, including an EEG, which shows massive amounts of brain activity, much more than normal. We also took some blood and saw that the cells are still… alive. We don’t know how since there is no pulse or heartbeat, but they’re still drawing energy from her. I’m not sure how great of an extent the serum has changed her body, but I think there’s still a chance she’ll wake up. Until then, we have her connected to machines that will continue to monitor her brain activity, as well as alert us when there’s a pulse.”

She then opened the room for them to see you. Bucky walked in slowly, taking in the sight of you. You were lying on the bed in a hospital gown. Attached to your head were the wires sensing your brain activity. The monitor above showed one set of waves that were constantly fluctuating. The other set of waves were flat, showing that the wires on your chest were not sensing anything. It was strange how still you were. No tell-tale rise and fall of your chest, no twitching or turning; Completely still. Bucky walked over to the bedside and touched your arm. He was surprised to feel the heat and softness against his fingertips.

“She’s still warm?” He asked without taking his eyes off of you.

“Yes. We can’t explain it.” Helen replied, hugging the clipboard to her chest as she watched him brush a piece of hair tenderly to the side of your face.

Suddenly, the waves on the screen fluctuated, setting off a light dinging. Bucky turned his head quickly to the screen and then back at Helen, alarm etched into his face. Helen walked over to reset the alarm, taking a moment to analyze the situation.

“It seems as if she’s registering your voice, Sergeant Barnes. Perhaps it would be of benefit if you visited and spoke to her often.” She said tactfully while adjusting one more setting on the screen.

Bucky said nothing in return, letting Helen return to the doorway.

“If you need anything, please don’t hesitate to ask.” She said, letting a moment pass before exiting the room.

Steve let a moment pass, watching Bucky as he pulled up a chair next to the bed.

“I’m gonna go grab you something to eat.” Steve said as he walked out of the room, closing the door gently behind him, leaving Bucky alone with you.

He sat in silence for a few moments before gently placing his hand atop yours, willing you to move, even just a centimeter, so he knew you were there.

Your body stayed as it was. Devoid of life.

---

“I don’t understand.” You replied to her, confused.

“It is rare enough to find someone with a pure, good heart. Add to that fact, the power that has been bestowed upon you. You have the capability to change to world. To heal it.” The mysterious woman said.

“There is a group of us, a few with similar attributes. We walk amongst the people, generation after generation. We guide humanity forward while protecting it from disasters greater than you could ever imagine. I believe that you could aid us in that work. I just hadn’t expected for us to meet so soon.”

She walked over to you and handed you the leaf she was holding, now turned to metal. You turned it over in your hand, feeling the energy coming off of it.

“I’m… extremely flattered. But there are plenty of other extremely good-hearted people out there. Steve, for example. Why me?”

“Ah, yes. Your friend Steve.” She said thoughtfully, now walking to the middle of the ashen clearing.

“Steve has a good heart. A very honorable man. But he lacks the discernment and the wisdom necessary to use these powers. He sees the world as black and white, when really things are endlessly grey. He lacks… perspective. To be in this role, you must understand that sometimes, you need to let things happen, even the bad ones, to protect the world at a larger scale. You, however, already have some of the power that comes with this role, and have used it in a worthy manner. I’ve seen some of the choices you’ve had to make. I’ve seen how you handle incredibly difficult decisions. Your mind is quick, your wit impressive, your heart pure. But perhaps most importantly of all, you possess the wisdom to use those attributes to help further humanity.”

“I see… but I don’t have all the powers that you seem to have.” You say hesitantly.

“It does not matter. I can bestow upon you the power, and I can show you how to turn this,” she says, gesturing to the few trees that you had revived.

“-into this.”

She raises her hands slowly, golden sigils forming around her arms. A blast of light and pressure made you step back and shield your eyes. The initial pulse over, you look around as the wind blew in a circle, lifting up the fallen gingko leaves into a storm. All of the charred remains of the land started slowly coming back to life. It grew back lush and healthy, returning the area to its natural glory. She waved her hand, causing a part of the ground next to a large boulder to collapse. She gently placed her hand on the rock, emitting more gold sigils before pulling away. As she moved back, water started flowing from where she had touched the rock, filling the ground, and creating a pond at its base.

You look around with wide eyes as you heard sounds of wildlife filling the area. You heard birds fly overhead as you watched a fawn come out from the bushes to take a drink from the pond. As you walked slowly closer, the woman gently placed her hand on the fawn’s back to keep it from getting spooked. Carefully reaching your hand out in offering, the fawn sniffed your hand before allowing you to softly scratch behind its ears. Looking down at the pond, several brightly colored fish swam amongst the lilies.

“You could help me do this and more.” She said, fondly petting the fawn. With her other hand, she manipulated the wind so that it fashioned your hair into a loose bun. She stepped closer to you, taking the metal leaf from your hand, and securing your hair with it. Slowly, you felt new power travel through your veins. You turned to look at her, slowly clenching your hands. As you opened them, water flowed from your palm, slipping through your fingers before falling onto the newly invigorated earth. A golden sigil was etched into your palm, glowing brightly. As you willed the water to stop, it trickled to a stop as the sigil disappeared. It was breathtaking. Eyes filled with wonderment, you looked up at her and met her eye.

“Teach me.”

The woman grinned before turning and walking away. You were about to start following her when you thought you felt something brush across your cheek. A familiar feeling. A whisper you could barely make out echoed through your head.

… still warm…

“Come.” She called behind her.

You snapped out of your daze and started walking again.

---

It’s been a little over a month since you had passed out in Bucky’s arms. At first, he refused to leave your side, even to sleep. Steve had convinced them to bring a cot into the room so Bucky could stop sleeping slumped over the bed in the chair. But after 2 weeks, Steve insisted that he go back to his room to sleep. Take some time for himself. They would let him know if anything happened.

Since then, Bucky had taken some time to reflect. He didn’t want to accept the worst possible outcome, but it seemed to be the only outcome. After the sun had set on the day that marked a month, he laid on his bed and sobbed, first angrily, then despairingly. You weren’t coming back to him.

The next day, he woke up numb. It ended up being the first day he didn’t visit you.

---

“Wow that’s amazing!” You shouted over the wind. You were currently with the woman atop a mountain. She had redirected an avalanche so that it missed the town at its base, and youhad helped.

She smiled. She had shown you several areas that she had helped before. First was a desert oasis that she kept from disappearing, and after that was a jungle in which you stopped a wildfire from killing off the last of an endangered monkey species. She turned and you followed her gaze. Suddenly, you were back at the pond you had started at.

“That was incredible. Thank you.” You said, breathless.

“I would be honored to help you with this work. How do I wake up and find you?”

“You don’t.” She said, her expression falling a bit.

You waited for her to explain.

“I wanted to show you everything you could accomplish before you made your decision. But unfortunately, to sustain this amount of power, you must take on a new form.”

You tilted your head slowly in confusion before you spoke.

“So, I’d have to leave my body for a new one?” You asked slowly.

“Essentially, yes. You would die, so to speak.” The woman said quietly before turning.

As you turned to follow her, you found yourself staring at your body hooked up to multiple machines. The woman walked around to the other side of the bed your body was on. Looking down affectionately at your sleeping form, she spoke:

“Your brain would stop emitting thought, and this form of yours would grow cold and die. But from it, your new form would be born. Ethereal, perfect, immortal.”

You swallowed thickly as you continued to stare at the monitor showing the last signs of life in your body,

“Okay, but would I be able to come back here in this new form?”

She paused thoughtfully.

“Theoretically, you’d have the capability to. But we could not allow it. To be able to walk amongst mortals in history, you must disappear from it first. When all of the lives you’ve touched have passed on, on then is when you may reappear alongside us. Until that time, you train with us in the shadows.”

“Oh.” You said, feeling impossibly small. “That’s… not unreasonable.”

“I wish not to lie to you. Normally, when we find someone we think worthy of this job, someone we want to walk alongside us in our journey, we meet their soul at death. And technically you have died. But a foreign power still lingers inside you. You may return to your old life if you wish. But the offer only stands once.”

“I see.” You said softly.

“I wish it were easier.” She said comfortingly.

“Me too. There were somethings here that I wanted to see through first.”

She gave you a knowing, sad smile.

“I suppose the biggest trial to gain this power is the sacrifice of leaving what you love behind. Yours is just beyond that door.” She said, nodding towards the door to the room.

“What?”

---

Six weeks since you had been gone. Two since he last saw you.

Not that Bucky was trying to keep track. He sat alone on his couch, staring at a blank tv. Nothing was playing. Not that it mattered. A knock on the door came through.

“Hey, Bucky, it’s me, Sam.” He half shouted through the door.

Bucky ignored him.

“I know you’re in there. You haven’t left.”

He groaned internally before responding to him from the couch.

“Did Steve send you? Go away.”

“I will not go away, now open this door.” Sam responded, jiggling the handle.

“No.” Bucky said, making no attempt to move.

“Fine then. But you made me do this.”

Bucky snapped his head towards the door as he heard Sam punch some numbers into the pin pad. It chirped before unlocking, Sam coming through the door.

“Hey, what’s your problem, man? Bucky said, coming face to face with Sam.

“Wasn’t a hard guess. Old people use the same password for everything. Shouldn’t have made it the same as your name on the Pacman machine leaderboard downstairs. You’ve been bumped down to second place by the way, curtesy of moi.” He said with flourish.

“What do you want, Sam?” Bucky asked annoyedly, sitting back down on the couch.

“You know why I’m here man.” He said, shoving his hands into his pockets before continuing:

“You gotta go see her.”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“Because she’s not coming back!” Bucky shouted. He started getting up.

“Everyone keeps telling me to go see her, but she’s gone, Sam. Gone. Just ripped from my arms. And she died for me.She wasted her life on me of all things. I’m not gonna go just to stare at her body and replay the worst moments of my life, over and overagain. I can’t do it anymore.”

Bucky blinked and realized there were tears in his eyes. His face was flushed from shouting and his chest was heaving. Sam let a moment pass before he spoke.

“Look, I’m not here to tell you to keep seeing her so that magically she’ll wake up. I’ll level with you, there’s a chance she might not. If you believe she’s not coming back, I’m not judging you on that. I’m here to tell you that if you think that, you need to say goodbye. Get some closure. Scream, cry, whatever. But afterwards, you’ll feel better. I can’t stand watching you suffer like this, man. I’ve seen people at the VA fall apart and stay that way. I just don’t want you to end up like that.”

Bucky stared at him before letting out a noise that got caught in his throat. His legs felt weak, and he found himself sitting on the couch with his face in his hands, crying.

Sam quietly sat next to him and put his arm around him.

“It’s gonna be okay, Buck. It is.”

---

Some time after Sam had left and he had washed his face, Bucky made his way down the hall to your room. It was late and subsequently quiet. Stopping in front of the door to the room your body was lying in, he took a deep breath and opened the door.

---

You blinked as the door opened and Bucky walked through. He looked tired. His eyes were red and puffy: His facial hair was grown out more than normal. He looked… skinnier? Without taking your eyes off of him, you turned to your teacher.

“How long has it been?”

“Time moves much more quickly in the realm we’re in unless you are interacting with the one you came from. It’s been a little over a month in his time.” She answered.

“A month? Really?”

She nodded as you watched Bucky slowly walk over to the chair next to the bed. You sat on the bed with one leg folded under you, the other swinging off the edge of the bed. The woman did the same, though she kept her legs together, putting her hands together in her lap. You watched as Bucky picked up your hand, enclosing it in both of his own as he sat down. He took a deep breath before he spoke.

“You know, people keep telling me to not give up hope. But they don’t realize what it does to me to see you like this.” He started, voice scratchy and soft. It sounded like the whispers you thought you had been hearing around you while traveling with your teacher, only now that you were right by him, you could hear him clearly.

“I come in here, and I talk to you like they tell me to. I read you the books you lent me out loud. I watch the waves on the screen go nuts when I talk, and I feel that your skin is warm when I touch you. But without you replying, without you touching me back, it feels worse than any torture I’ve endured in my life.”

Tears spilled over onto your cheeks as you listened. The ache in your heart growing ever stronger.

“I wish I had gotten a chance to tell you that you made my life worth living. I was just going through the motions. Trying to make amends, trying to make up for everything I’ve done, and maybe then I’d have some peace. But I never expected to be happy. And now you’re gone. And I feel nothing. It’s worse than before I knew what being happy felt like. I’m not ready to go back. I’m not ready to lose you.”

“Please,” he whispered.

“Come back.”

He bowed his head, letting the tears drop onto the floor, clutching your hand so tightly, it surely would’ve hurt if you could feel it.

Tears still streaming, you turned to look at the woman. Time had slowed to a stop, seconds barely going by. She acknowledged you with a slight nod, letting a moment pass before asking:

“Which choice have you made, young one?”

You smiled, wiping the tears from your eyes one side at a time.

“I’m going to make the wrong decision. The selfish decision. I want to stay.” You said, happiness overflowing in your voice as more tears slip down your face.

“There is no wrong decision.” She said, placing your hand on your shoulder. Bowing her head lightly, she looked you in the eyes.

“Are you ready to go back?”

“Yes, thank you, uhm…”

“Sersi,”

“Sersi.” You repeated.

“Thank you for everything. This has been an incredible experience. I’ll remember this for the rest of my life.”

She smiled knowingly.

“When you need me, you’ll know where to find me.” She said, plucking the gingko leave out of your hair. Your hair fell out around your face as a white light grew ever brighter, soon blinding your vision.

---

Bucky raised his head at the sound of a foreign beeping in the room. Locating the source of the sound, he focused in on the red flashing on the screen.

Pulse 72

Pulse 72?

Pulse 72.

Bucky scrambled to press his fingers against your wrist. There it was.

Suddenly, your chest rose. He heard you take in an impossibly deep breath in and back out. He was stunned. While he was staring in disbelief, you turned your head slightly before opening your eyes.

“Bucky?”

He couldn’t do anything but hold you to him.

“Woah there, did you miss me?” You teased.

“Yes. So much.”

You pulled away from him and tilted your head, confused.

“Do I even want to know how long I was out?” You asked, ripping the stickies off of your head.

“Six weeks.”

“Six weeks!?”

“Do you remember anything that happened?” He asked, soaking in your voice.

“The last thing I remember is… the mountains.”

Bucky sat in silence a moment before he grabbed your hand.

“When you were gone, it made my life feel like it was over. I couldn’t stand it. It felt like I had nothing, all over again. You and I have grown really close and I just wanted you to hear all of that now that I have a second chance. I want to be by your side, through thick and thin, if you’ll have me.” He asked, gripping your hand tighter.

You stared into his eyes, the light reflecting the frosty color of his irises brilliantly. You leaned over to kiss him, and he met you halfway. Light and chaste, you pull back and rest your forehead on his.

“Of course I will, Buck. Always.”

---6 Months Later---

You trekked through the tall grass, smelling the coast and nearby sea.

“Just a little farther.” You called back to Bucky.

“I feel like you’ve said that several times now.” He joked, shielding his eyes from the glare of the sun and the bite of the wind.

You turned around, stopping in your tracks.

“Haha, very funny. But seriously, I think it’s at top of this cliff,” you said, peering up at the ledge several feet above you.

He caught up to where you were, placing a quick kiss to your nose before bracing his back against the wall and interlocking his hands.

“C’mon, I’ll give you a boost.”

You stepped into his hand and jumped up, using the extra momentum to catch the edge. Pulling yourself up, you turned around, stomach to the ground, extending your hand to him. He grunted as he climbed partway up, grabbing your hand when the soil turned sandy halfway, leaving no holds for him to grab onto.

Pulling him up, you both sit for a moment, catching your breath and taking in the view.

“So,” he started. “Is it anything like you remembered?”

“Yeah. I think. It’s kind of hazy. But I think I dreamed about this place a lot while I was out. I felt like it was an itch that I couldn’t scratch unless I came here to check it out for myself.” You said, resting back onto your hands.

“Well, let’s scratch your itch.”

Bucky got up and dusted his pants off before offering you his hand. You accepted and pulled yourself up, steadying yourself before walking through the trees into the coming clearing.

When you reached it, it felt eerily familiar. The arrangement of the trees, the water running into the pond, even the arrangement of the moss. It was like peering at your dream through a pair of glasses; It was much clearer now.

“Wow. This place has really recovered since the last time we’ve been here,” Bucky said as he watched the gingko leaves fall around him.

You walked over to the pond and crouched, washing the fish swim between the lilies. You had a nagging feeling that something else was missing from the scene. You eyed a glint in the water while responding back to him.

“Yeah, it has. I think this is how it looked in my dream.”

Bucky walked over to you, and you looked up at him lovingly. Standing up, you wrap your arms around his neck.

“I’m sorry I dragged you to the other side of the globe just to come here.”

“Hey hey hey, it’s alright,” he said, putting his hands on your waist. “Who says we won’t be touring other parts of Japan while we’re here? Besides, this is where we had our first mission. It’s like coming back to a first date spot.” He said with a grin.

You couldn’t help but smile.

“I love you.”

He blinked, before smiling wider.

“I love you too.” He replied, wrapping his arms around you to pull you close to him, kissing you deeply.

---

From further up in the air, Sersi watched from the concealed airship, a man walking up to join her at the window.

“Still think she made the right decision?” He said, holding his hands behind his back.

“Come now, Ikaris. If I had had you before this life, would you be happy at the thought of me giving you up?”

“Of course not. But you didn’t have me before, you have me now.”

“Yes, yes.” She said, smiling as she brushed him off.

“Besides,” she continued. “I don’t think I could’ve offered her anything else. Once I saw how she looked at him, I knew it was only a matter of time.”

Smiling wistfully, she flicked her finger, sending a breeze through the landing where you were.

---

The ginkgo leaves fluttered onto your faces, making you both laugh as you separated to brush them off.

“Come on,” you said, grabbing his hand and leading the way. “Let’s go see the coast.”

He smiled, looking at you with adoration, and followed you out from the clearing to wherever you would walk from then on. A ray of light shined through the trees onto the pond, the glint of the golden ginkgo leaf sparkling out from under the rocks at the bottom.

#kas9kwc #Bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x you #bucky barnes angst #bucky x y/n #bucky imagine

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lizzy-williams · 3 years

Text

𝐓𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐫’𝐬 𝐏𝐞𝐭

🍎Warnings: dark!peter parker, manipulation, innocent!reader, smut, triggering themes, oral (male receiving), HOLY FUCK THIS IS WRONG. But holy hell... is it erotic 😏

🍎Read at your own risk!!! You’ve been warned, don’t wanna see it then don’t read it.

🍎Masterlist

🍎A/N: I am kinda in love with the dark!peter genre of fanfic, so behold the first of many 🙃 THE READER IS IN COLLEGE

“Professor?”

The voice was soft, but with an empty classroom, it was heard by the only one left in the room after his last period, his eyes averting his paper that he was grading.

As her eyes met his from the doorway as she made a soft smile, her bag slung over her shoulder as she held a few books in her hand, her demeanor calm and gentle.

“Miss [l/n], what might I be able to help you with,” the young professor spoke, a genuine smile crossing his face, setting his red grading pen down on his oak desk.

The girl peeked her head past the doorframe, hoping that the classroom was truly cleared out. She was shy, and if there was even one person, she would mutter out a ‘never mind’ and go back to her dorm and settle for the evening. But luckily the room was desolate besides the one person she truly wanted to see.

But Peter was more excited to see her than he should have been. [y/n] was his favorite student, and after things fell out with MJ, he was actually quite lonely. But [y/n]... she was perfect for him. She was brilliant, stunning, but most of all she was innocent.

In the smarts department she was a genius. But when it came to everything and anything to with adult life and culture, she was naive. And a teacher was always up for teaching the inexperienced by any means.

“P-Professor, I was just wondering if you could help me with this paper. I just wanted you to proof read and tell me what I can do to improve it,” she went on, slowly walking towards Mr. Parker’s desk.

“Yes, I guess, I need a break from grading anyways,” he acted thoughtful, even though grading papers was the last thing that he wanted to do.

“Thank you,” she gave a small smile, taking a seat in front of his desk.

But what made his breath hitch made him want to shove everything off the desk and take her right there.

As she bent down to unzip her backpack and get her folder holding said assignment, Peter could see right down her shirt, her breasts on full display, the white bra she was wearing being exposed.

I wonder what color her panties are, so fucking pure, I wonder what noises she’ll make when I-

“Mr. Parker?” [y/n] spoke, visibly concerned, snapping him out of his lust-induced funk he was in, making him blink.

“Sorry,” he cleared his throat, “please, why don’t you read it to me?” He suggested, resting his chin on his knuckles, his full attention on her.

“Oh, um, okay, yeah of course,” she laughed nervously, glancing down at her almost masterpiece.

But as she began to read the words in front of her, Peter was focused on something else more... distracting.

Even though only she torso could be seen over the top of his desk, his gaze trailed up and down her body, practically undressing her with his eyes, taking in every part of her, from the way her breasts looked against her sweater, or the way her hair perfectly fit her face, but most of all her lips.

He couldn’t help but think the most sinful things about them. What it would be like to kiss them, what they would look like wrapped around his cock or sucking on his fingers, or what they would look like if he came all over them.

He watched them as they moved, pronouncing each word with ease, the words she was speaking being practically unheard as she went on. And he didn’t miss the skirt that she was wearing when she walked in, perfect and white, something that just screamed “virgin”.

Time seemed to fly by as his thoughts drifted to sinful things, thinking about taking her on every surface in his classroom. On his desk, against the wall, even on top of the desk she sat at everyday in the front of the room.

“So,” she began to speak, Peter snapping into the real world again, “how was that? I think paragraph two was a little strange sounding, but does everything else sound okay?”

She was like an anxious puppy, emotionally vulnerable to criticism. But she was willing to take help if it would make her paper better. But that was in the back of the professor’s mind.

“It sounds amazing, you’re a really good writer, [y/n].”

This was the first time that the professor had used her first name, usually addressing her formally. It was strange to her, making her shift in her seat.

“I’ll tell you what. I have a special course,” he began, and of course, [y/n] always eager to learn, she perked up, “it a special one-on-one course. I save it for the smartest in each class.”

[y/n] was now completely focused on what he was going to say next, not knowing that this was the thing that would take a toll on her life as she knew it.

“That means you get a good grade on your paper there and even extra credit. It’s a little interactive, if you’re okay with that.”

[y/n] nodded hesitantly, Peter giving a smile that was hard to read, but the red flag went over her head, thinking that it was just another one of his friendly grins.

“Well, Miss [y/n], if you’ll take a seat at your normal desk, we can get started.”

She stood, making her way to her usual desk, taking a seat, Peter giving a shake of his head.

“No, no, take a seat on top of the desk, if you will,”

Without a word, she shifted, propping herself up on the flat surface, her hands folded in her lap, her legs swinging as her ankles crossed.

The position made Peter eager to get this going.

“Alright. Now, I’m going to do something, and I need you to understand that this is for a completely educational purpose, okay?”

[y/n] nodded, letting out a gentle “uh-huh,” before Peter got closer, a comforting expression visible on his face.

He nudged her thighs apart with his hands, treating her as if she might shatter. When he was finally positioned right where he wanted to be, he placed a hand on the small of her back, pressing her against him, her breath hitching, trying to keep the whimper she wanted to let out in her throat.

“I’m going to do something else now, then we can start the lesson,”

And without a response, he leaned in, his face going into the crook of her neck, laying a soft kiss. But one kiss turned into three, and soon the kissing turned into licking and nipping, the whimper now finding its way out of her mouth.

Meanwhile, Peter was in heaven. Her skin was as soft as it looked, her scent smelling like peaches and cider, and he loved the way her neck felt under the mercy of his mouth.

“Your doing wonderful, [y/n],” he muttering into her skin, the vibration making her arms wrap around him, similar to a hug.

He continued, and just before he stopped, me stuck out his tongue and licked a strip up her throat and up to her earlobe, before mumbling, “I think you’re ready to start the lesson now...”

Before she could respond, he pulled back, beginning to speak again, her arms loosening from his torso.

“Now this is a lesson that most people learn in college, but they never learn it the right way,” he began, her anxious gaze meeting his calm and collected one, “what I’m going to give you is a gift. An opportunity not many girls your age get.”

“W-What class is this for...?” [y/n] muttered nervously, “I don’t know if I want this-,”

Peter’s eyes darkened, not liking the sudden disobedience. And she was doing so good...

“You want the extra credit right? Would hate to see what it would do to your perfect grade if you missed out on an opportunity like this,” his voice was dark as he looked into her wide and frightened eyes, “don’t you want a good grade?”

[y/n] nodded, hating to think that there was ever a chance she would get a less then satisfactory grade in her favorite class.

“Good girl,” his voice softened, his hand running up and down soothingly as she began to lose tension, “I just want what’s best for you. You are my favorite student after all.”

[y/n] whispered a small ‘thank you’ but her breath hitched as she felt his hand drift farther up her thigh, up and under her skirt. With a small whimper, he touched her covered clit, making her jump.

She had never even touched herself there, the only thing close being when she would drive over a steep hill and she felt a strange feeling in her gut.

“What are you doing?” She anxiously whispered, Peter shushing her.

“Shh, this is the first lesson. Repeat after me. Pleasure is key.”

She silently repeated. She had never really had a class about something close to this accept for the sex talk they gave whatever many years ago in high school.

She felt so dirty. But what he was doing felt so good.

His actions progressed, pulling her panties to the side, his index and pointer fingers drifting across her folds. She whimpered, her nails latching onto his shoulders, her forehead now resting on his shoulder as she tried to wrap her head around what she was feeling.

“Look at you, your so wet... virgins get wet so easily...,” he growled, finding her clit quickly, making her grasp tighter onto him.

She felt as if she was in a movie. A dirty movie that her friends would sometimes put on. And every time, [y/n] would close her eyes during the sex scenes. But now it was like she was in one.

“I need you to slip off your skirt and your panties, alright? It’s time for another part of the lesson.”

Her nod was full of reluctance, but she did as she was told, her body betraying her mind. Peter watched as her clit was exposed, and absolutely hairless.

He felt like a kid on Christmas. All that time waiting, and finally seeing his gift. And it was just what he had asked for.

“I’m going to slip off your shirt and your bra now. This part requires you to be completely nude,” he said sternly.

Before she would absorb his words, her arms were pulled up, her sweater slipping off, her bra not too soon after. And unlike any other boy would, Peter removed it with ease with no trouble at all.

He stepped away, looking at his favorite student. Her hair was ruffled, her clit swollen as she stayed with her thighs spread, her breasts looking more perfect in person then he ever thought they would.

So many nights had he stroked his cock to the thought of her. The thought of what her body would look like. What sounds she would make. And most of all what she would look like on her knees.

“Absolutely stunning. Get on your knees, princess,” he pointed in front of him.

“Why?”

As soon as it left her mouth she wanted to stuff the word back in, the look in her professor’s eyes making her stomach tense.

“Get. On. Your. Knees.” He gritted, “I won’t ask again.”

She then scrambled to the ground, on her knees and looked up at him, her eyes pleading for forgiveness.

His hand cupped her cheek, his thumb rubbing against her bottom lip, her doe eyes attached to his wandering ones.

“Pleasure is key, remember? And because you don’t have a partner, you’ll be mine. Now the first part is with your mouth. I’ll show you how to do it to me. And then I will do it to you, understand?”

“Mhm.” She nodded, his hands reaching for his belt, unbuckling it slowly, her eyes glued to his hands.

As soon as he pulled both his pants and boxers down, stepping out of them, [y/n] was transfixed at the sight of such a falic part of the male body.

She had never seen one up close and in person before. It was flushed pink and twitching as if it had its own heartbeat.

“Take it in one of your hands,” and she did as he said, “now cup my balls princess,”

The instructions were easy enough. But it was hard to do. For her at least.

The contact to his cock and the sight of his favorite girl on her knees for him was enough to get him to cum on the spot. But he would rather cum down her throat.

“Open your mouth, [y/n].” He instructed, and she did as he demanded, tears almost forming, “now stick your tongue out,”

She looked so perfect like this. He was ready to make this angel a little less holy. To teach her that this was only something he could give her.

“So good for me,” he weaved his hand through the back of her head and in her hair, pulling her in closer, “put it in your mouth, princess, I’ll do the rest, yeah?”

She couldn’t help but lick it first before putting the tip in her mouth, her tongue swirling around it, hoping that she was doing a good job.

But she was suddenly jerked foreword, his cock going into her mouth, his tip poking at the mouth while she gagged. Tears welled up in her eyes, making Peter reach for her hand, holding it as he pulled back out, before sliding right back in roughly. Soon he set a steady pace, the girl below him desperately trying to steady her breaths.

Tears streamed down her face, her mascara ruined, her lips swollen, her hands holding onto his thighs to anchor him. She whimpered and whined against him, wanting to stop but the vibrations from her protest only spurred him on, fucking her face, his perfect little toy.

This was everything he had imagined and more.

“Such a good girl, just like that, you’re doing amazing - fuck -,”

A few more thrusts and he was right on the edge, his hand gripping on her hair tighter and his pace faster.

“I’m gonna cum, fuck, I’m gonna cum down your throat, princess, just keep going-,”

When the warm liquid finally oozed out, she began to cough in her desperation for air. He pulled out, grabbing her jaw as he came on her face as she coughed up his cum, sobbing as she gasped for air.

And even though she was almost choked to death by her teacher’s cock, she still managed to let out a rough whimper: “Did I do good?”

“Yes, [y/n], you did absolutely amazing.” He panted, his face flushed, “I think you’ve learned enough for today, we’ll pick this back up tomorrow.” He sighed, grabbing his pants and slipping them back on and the girl scrambled to find her clothes.

Soon enough she was fully dressed, grabbing her bag. But she was soon pulled back by her arm, now facing Mr. Parker.

“Remember, [y/n], this club is only for my best students. Nobody else can know, or else they’ll all want to join. We can’t have that...,” he said quietly, giving a sweet kiss to her forehead as she closed her eyes.

“Yes, Mr. Parker...,” she muttered, hugging him gently, “thank you for the opportunity.”

“Of course. You are my favorite student after all.”

#dark!peter #peter parker x reader #peter parker smut #peter parker #dark!professor!peter #dark!peter x reader

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