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#THEY'RE MAKING ME SUFFER WITH THEIR SILENCE
bat-the-misfit · 9 months
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half of the world talking about the barbie movie, the other half talking about nimona and then there's me, Uncle Bat, still waiting for the goofiest teen mystery movie brazil will ever make
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dootplusone · 3 months
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(OG post has Reblogs turned off. You can find it here!)
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(OG post has Reblogs turned off. You can find it here!)
(If the OP would prefer this post not link back to the OG post or is otherwise is not okay w/ this post in reference to theirs, please let me know in some form so I can delete/edit it as needed.)
Thinking. Abt this but with Bones. Like. Post-Tholian Web? Post-Mirror Mirror?
For AOS, could be after Into Darkness and/or Beyond.
A Bones who's just. So anxious. So stressed. So overwhelmed that it starts taking a toll on his health. Maybe he doesn't even realise - or maybe he does and tries his best to push through it until it knocks him on his ass. Kind of in the vein of "You don't actually know how tired you are until you stop. And then you just physically cannot start again." It becomes his new baseline, a problem that just brews and storms in the distance.
And he just carries on. And keeps going and going and going until one day he realises that 'Oh fuck, I'm not okay' and has about 5 seconds of warning before he straight up collapses, doesn't matter if it's on the bridge, in the madbay, on a planet - he's going down. (Maybe a repeat of Tholian Web where he just straight up faints into Spock's arms? Full whammy, why not)
Maybe it's a high-tension situation getting resolved that does it. The pure relief of it reminds him of how tired he is. How tired he's been for a while. His body sees that momentary rest and goes "More of that, please. And I'm not asking."
And he's so rendered by it that he doesn't grumble about being coddled like he normally would when he wakes up. He knows not to fuck with the medbay staff - they're just as firm as he is on recovery, and that's not by accident - and he knows that Spock and Kirk will be hovering, because they see any problem as something they, too, should shoulder the burden of.
...And because they're some of the most protective people in the damned universe. And that goes for pretty much all the people on board the Enterprise.
In some scenarios, it's just a case of letting his body and mind rest properly. In others, there's a lot more recovery involved than anyone initially expects. Luckily for him, he has a found family who are determined to be there with him at every step. It just takes a couple reminders, every once in a while.
#leonard bones mccoy#star trek tos#star trek aos#whump#back on my bullshit#aos bones fretting over Jim and Spock and their injuries; completely forgetting that hes also a little worse for wear#thinking back to dustykneed's post abt him being fucked up and grieving after ST:ID and. Lets just make it even more physical#After the issues they face from that; Spirk are more aware of Bones' tendency to brush things off. are more equipped to take care of him#when he needs it; just as he does for them. He's so stubbornly self sufficient and it worries them. But they're equally as stubborn and#loving. Unstoppable Force meets Immovable Object. I feel like post ST:ID is where they kind of Learn that Bones keeps shit on the down low#Because like. Bones will complain. Unless it's smth that's just affecting him. And then he suddenly keeps it to himself. When he complains#abt that whole fiasco he complains abt Jim dying. Abt Spock almost dying on that planet. About how they all almost died. But he doesn't tal#about how HE almost died from that fucking torpedo almost blowing up on him. Not a word. Jim forgot it had even happened until like. Carol#brings it up in passing. Maybe she has nightmares on the incident. But he realises Bones has just NEVER fucking mentioned it despite him#being the master complainer. That sets off the first alarm bells. And then maybe Uhura asks Jim how Bones is doing bc she knows that Bones#would just say he's fine. But Jim is like ??? Bc why wouldn't Bones be okay. And then she realises that HE HASN'T realised that Bones is th#kind of motherfucker to suffer in silence. and she's like Jim. Jim he literally ran himself to the ground trying to revive you. Jim. Are yo#kidding me have you NOT TALKED ABOUT THAT??? ANY OF IT??? Thus... Jim realises or maybe even Remembers what Bones is like#bc maybe at some point he DID know Bones well enough to know when he's fucking himself over. But all the Bullshit that theyve gone through#and the fact they work in entirely different parts of the ship kind of. Alienated them a bit. And suddenly hes like. Oh. Oh No. Oh FUCK.#because Jesus how the FUCK does he even approach this. But he manages it. And Spock gets in on it too as he slowly gets to know the doctor#And then post-beyond its like. Yeah. All three of them gang up on each other. That includes Spock and Kirk making sure Bones is as Fine as#he always says he is.#anyway. Yeah. I just think Bones probably stresses and overthinks too much but god forbid anyone comfort him. Self sacrificing bastard#wow this is a lot of alphabet soup im so sorry AHAHA
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opens-up-4-nobody · 2 months
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...
#its sort of funny. i think my medication is working pretty well. i feel stable in a way i never really have before#is it the dopamine stablizer or is it my ion channels? whos to say. it doesn't matter. but it also doesnt change some things#the ways i think and react negativly to change. but it makes it easier to deal with. i still experience this strange dispaire on the#weekends or anytime im not working. i think the oddest thing is thst i dont think ive ever been this consistenly sad#not in a depressed sort of way. just a passing thoughts make me tear up sort of way. it doesnt feel out of control. it just feels like a#prelude to grief i guess. bc my mum is still in the hospital and its so hard to kno what that means from halfway across the country#my sisters are both home right now. they both live within 3hrs of where we grew up. one sister lives in the city my mom goes to for#treatment. so they have the opportunity to see her more than me. i dunno if they do tho. we dont really talk. i dont kno if they're as sad#as i am. if im overreacting bc i cant physically see what's happening. what the feeling is in the room. not that she would probably complain#shes the suffer in silence type. my dad keeps texting us pics of our shitty lil sunroom that hes redoing#to make my mum a lil sanctuary. he must be sad too. its his wife. hes staying with her in the hospital rn. i dunno its so weird#when i talk to my counselor she assumes i find out info thru calls or talk to my sisters abt it and i gotta b like nah we dont really talk#i get my info thru text. i havent talked to my parents on the phone in like a month. i dunno we just dont talk. so i dont kno how to reach#out and be like yo so whats up? shoulf i plan on coming home this summer for a bit?? like???#this is the disadvantage of leaving thr place where you grew up. probably when i finish my phd i should move closer to home#somewhere in the Appalachian mountains maybe. somewere in the eastern deciduous forrest. somewhere with thunderstorms.#but thats years from now. who knows what ill b doing. for now im just sad and tired and i dont quite kno what to do in the short or long#term bc im feeling the weight of my mental limitations rather intensely. but maybe im just being self limiting#whatever. i dont have a dead mum yet. shes not even on hospice care. things are just uncertain and dont look so hot#i just dont see how it can get better from here when chemo gave her secondary blood cancer and shes still full of tumors#i dont think im being that dramatic. it just objectively seems not great for survival#unrelated
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emmafallsinlove · 1 year
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today i listened to atw 10 minutes version in my office and it was me and just two of my coworkers and anyways. i sang along and i didn’t listen to atw with my airpods as i usually do when i listen to taylor. and i put all my heart and soul into it literally screaming and after 5 minutes a coworker of mine was like “god is this over” and i was like “nope it’s a 10 minutes song” and then i kept singing kind of screaming until the 10 minutes were over and i think they hate me now.
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emotargaryen · 2 months
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the fact that migraines can just spread for no reason like why does my neck hurt now... im so jealous of people who dont get migraines you guys dont know how good you have it
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omiiuvz · 2 months
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𝐬𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐢𝐧’ ; 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐧
msby boys being lovestricken (╹◡╹)♡ (pt.1)
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note!! fluff, slightly suggestive, gen!reader, timeskip hq boys , not proof-read
hinata shoyo , sakusa kiyoomi x gen!reader (seperate)
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SAKUSA KIYOOMI ★彡
"you are burning lasers into my back." despite saying so in feigned annoyance, it doesn't affect you. instead you respond to his remark with a slight chuckle, meanwhile kiyoomi only peeks behind him to look at what new thing has bombarded your little brain.
he's busy washing the dishes while you're sat on the counter admiring from behind— eyes scanning at how his tone muscles are being enhanced through his tight shirt. he's wearing a white gym tee, and it's hugging every inch of those back muscles you can't help from oggling at. his waist is being perfectly defined as well, god you want to touch him. obviously you'd stare him down.
"omi." he sucks in a breath, anticipating what stupid question will leave your mouth this time.
of course he truly does not care, he loves your stupid questions and rambles. loves your goofy side as it allows him to embrace a little silliness in him too! loves it when you smother him in affection, you are the only exception to touching him as you please.
"I love your back muscles." he chokes. now that, he wasn't expecting. the glass plate almost flew out of his gloves hands from your sudden confession.
"what?" is all he can say, completely baffled. kiyoomi is only met with the sound of your slippers hitting the wooden floor. then its your hands slipping onto his waist— they're feeling his sides and it's causing him to flush strawberry red— the fabric is so smooth that it makes it much more easier to snake your hands all over him.
before he could even take in a breath, he feels your hands now suddenly rubbing along the broadness of his back. you are driving him insane.
"y/n, quit it. m'trying to wash the dishes." but he's far from washing them now. the plate in his hand is long gone, only sitting in the secondary sink waiting to be rinsed off.
"mm, but you look so good omi~" you're pawing on his waist again, pulling him closer causing him to jolt a bit.
the sound of those pink rubber gloves hitting the sink in frustration signals you that he's given up. finally he's fully looking at you, pointedly albeit, but you grin at him with success.
he's turned himself around with a huff, leaning against the countertop looking down at you cordially.
"you're such a puppy aren't you?" you were about to talk back, however your words are sucked back in as you feel his lips abruptly on your own.
now it was your turn to turn red, you could almost feel yourself fall though his hand are quick to wrap around your waist— you swear you could feel him smile with pride by getting back at you.
he's pushing himself more against you, the proximity between you both is long gone. he allows another hand to caress your cheek, his thumb gliding a slight under your eye. — lips moving skillfully on yours, your grasp around his body is now gripping tightly on the cloth. the tips of his dark curls are touching your forehead, the pressure of your intimate action only increasing.
it's only when you push him away, desperate for oxygen that the kiss breaks. the distance between you both though still ever so close. the feeling of each others hot breaths and the small silence is cut off with a small chuckle leaving those soft lips of his.
"are you happy now?" a small pinch on your cheek is followed with his teasing, making you pout. still you're again left blushing.
he's stupidly in love with you.
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HINATA SHOYO ☆彡
he swears its been centuries. no maybe even longer than that, whatever is longer than centuries that's what it felt like for hinata. he felt like he was on death's door, because fuck he missed you so much.
muscular arms are wrapped around you so tightly, you're basically suffering from his overwhelming (but wondrous) affection.
"sho, you're gonna kill me with your hugs," exasperating with giggles, you try to push him a little as your stuck planted on his lap. he's been like this ever since he arrived home from an overseas MSBY tournament, dragging you off your feet and encasing you on your couch. he just missed you. your body. your warmth, your love.
"mm little longer baby I promise. 'just missed you so much... n'your scent." lips are tickling the crook of your neck, now your giggles were out of fluster, face beet red.
hands incased between his biceps, while his were gripping your hips and lower back like its last life. his hot breath is making yourself feel warmer than usual, thank god you were at home. you could feel the heat rising up to your ears, his clinginess has gotten you in an blushing mess.
yet now you really needed to push him off before you die of his intimacy. so with no other option with every last bit of strength you tilted your head up just enough to place small loving kisses along his neck. he's letting out small shriek then its followed with a low groan, begging for you to stop.
"mmf! stop baby- tickles!" finally he backed away from you, however that doesn't mean you're not off his lap and his arms still embracing your figure. he is though finally away from your very much hot face.
"wow you're red." is all he says once composed, face completely oblivious to the reasons on why you are oh so red. his remark makes you cower, face falling to hide in his chest. you send him a small light punches, muttering words of protest.
"that's because of you, you idiot!"
he admires this cute side of you. rubbing his hand along your back he apologizes, leaning in to shower you in kisses as an apology.
he starts from your shoulders, then up to your neck— it tickles but you love it when he kisses you like this. full of so much of love that it's radiating off of him. the way each peck is gently being placed as if you're made of glass. his grasp on you still tight but not too much that it hurts— then his lips meet your cheeks. not long before he's asking you to look up at him so his lips can meet your own.
"look at me baby, wanna kiss your pretty lips."
he's never felt more at home than now.
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@omiiuvz | 02.24.24
©️ all rights reserved. do not copy / plagiarize my work.
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woso-dreamzzz · 2 months
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Injured VII
Alexia Putellas x Child!Reader
Jenni Hermoso x Child!Reader
Summary: Alexia tries to get her act together
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For as long as she will ever live, Alexia will never forget her mother's face that day at Alba's door.
She will never forget the genuine horror on her mother's face even as she took control of the situation. She will never forget that night when Alba slammed her against the wall after the final of the Copa de la Reina. She will never forget the way you hid behind Jenni's legs after your ballet lesson.
It's all she thinks about even as she sits in the rocking chair with a sleeping Jaume in her arms.
"Ale?" Olga says sleepily," It's three in the morning. Come back to bed."
Alexia doesn't want to. She doesn't want to let Jaume go but she doesn't want to look at him either.
He was so perfect. His birth had been quick and easy unlike yours. Alexia had felt an instant connection to him, unlike when she suffered a bought of post-partum depression with you. He was so soft and so perfect and yet...
Alexia couldn't believe that she has pushed you away in favour of him.
She had a beautiful son and daughter. Two children, not one.
She thought having a sibling would be the best thing for you. She wanted to build a family with Olga. She never considered that she hadn't actually included you in that family.
"Alexia," Olga says, a bit more awake now," Come on. He's due for a feed soon. I'd like some sleep before that."
Mechanically, Alexia places her son back in his crib, wiping away some of the drool on his face as she allows Olga to lead her back to bed.
A sense of numbness follows her now and it's clear to everyone.
Word has spread amongst the team now about what has happened. They know the bare minimum, only that Alba took Bambi and that Jenni has dropped everything to fly across the world for you.
No one knows why, officially. It's clear that Mapi and Ingrid have informed a few team members. Paredes, in particular, cannot look Alexia in the eye anymore and some of the younger players are wary seeing that.
Her life is falling apart. She had no idea you were the linchpin holding it all together.
Olga lays next to her, head pillowed on Alexia's chest.
"You're so tense," She says," Relax. Everything's going to be fine."
Alexia scoffs. "Is it?"
Her question hangs in the air for several minutes. Neither of them speak. Neither of them move.
"Yes," Olga says eventually," You need to stay positive, Alexia. If not for yourself then for your daughter-"
"Your daughter?" Alexia echoes Olga's words perfectly," My daughter? Is she not ours?"
The silence is telling and Olga rolls over and away.
"Is she? Jaume is ours. y/n is yours."
Alexia sits up in bed, reaching over to flick a lamp on. This wasn't a conversation she could have in the dark.
"We have a son together. We're going to get married. In what world is Bambi just mine?!"
"In every world!" Olga sits up too. "She has always been yours, Alexia! I am just the woman her Mami is marrying! Nothing more, nothing less!"
"How can you say that?! We're making a family together! Bambi is included in that family!"
"Of course she is but when have I ever taken that role in her life?! You took her to football! You take her to ballet!"
"She stays home with you all day!" Alexia bites back, standing now until they're both yelling at each other over the bed. "You make her lunch! You keep her occupied!"
"And you do her baths and her bedtime routine! You do her morning routine too! God, Alexia, I am essentially her glorified babysitter! You have never once let me take over those things!"
"You didn't ask?! Olga, if you wanted to do that stuff just ask me!"
"And be rejected? No! You've never given any indication that I was even allowed to try!"
"Because I thought you didn't want to! Bambi has always been mine! Forgive me for not knowing how much to put on your plate. I was trying to make this transition easy!"
"An easy transition?! Alexia, I was pregnant! I was already thrown in the deep end! Adding a self-sufficient kid wouldn't have been much worse!"
They're both screaming at each other now and Jaume clearly hears the noise because he cries from down the hall.
Alexia takes a deep breath, eyes shutting briefly as she counts to ten to calm herself.
Olga goes to get Jaume, moving out the door.
"If we're going to get Bambi back," Alexia calls after her," Then we have to both want her!"
The forms about your ballet class lay on the kitchen table when Alexia gets up the next day. Things were frosty last night when Olga came back to bed with Jaume but they seemed to be looking up when Olga said that they would have a mature conversation about the Bambi situation when Alexia got home.
Alexia picks it up as she eats her breakfast, skimming through it. It's for an extra class on Thursday nights (five until seven) on top of your usual ones. Apparently, it's for those little kids that have real potential. As in, the potential to be great.
Alexia had been one of those kids but for football instead of ballet. She had excelled. She was one of the greatest in the world now all because her father saw the potential in her and signed her up for a team.
She had tried to do the same with you. She took you to the under-fives Barcelona team but it hadn't turned out how she want it to. The other children had left you in the dust. Alexia had hoped that it would be a one time thing, that the first session was a fluke.
You were already so different to her and even back then, she knew that when Jaume arrived things would be different.
She'd tried to get you into football so you would have something to bond over together, at least until Jaume was big enough to play with you.
But it wasn't meant to be and her Mama had insisted in signing you up for something else.
Originally, Alexia had planned on it being another team sport, desperate to have something at least similar to football that she could cling to.
Instead, her Mama had reminded her of last Christmas when the family went to go see the Nutcracker and how enamoured you had been.
Ale's Mama had pushed and pushed for ballet and Alexia was glad that she had.
The forms sat signed on the kitchen table as Alexia washed up her bowl and dialled a number on her phone.
"Hola, Mama," She says," It's about Bambi..."
It's after training that Alexia goes to see her Mama and sister. They meet up at Eli's house and all crowd around the kitchen table.
Jenni is there too and when Alexia asks who is looking after you, she's told that Mapi and Ingrid have taken you for ice cream.
"I don't like this," Alba mutters from where she's leaning against the wall. She's the only one not sat, arms crossed over her chest. "How do we know that she's not going to take Bambi home and neglect her again, huh?"
It's the hardest words Alexia has ever had to say but she pushes them out of her mouth. "I don't want you to give me Bambi back, not now at least."
"What do you mean, Alexia?" Her Mama asks.
"I...I have a lot of making up to do," Alexia admits," I broke her trust and that is not an easy thing to get back. If I want Bambi to come home then she has to want it to. I don't want her to be unhappy again."
"What are you saying?"
"Let me visit her, please. Let me earn back her trust, please."
Everyone knows Eli is in charge here. She is the head of the family and everyone defers to her on big decisions like this. This is a family matter. This is about her granddaughter's happiness and her daughter's peace of mind.
"Bambi is very fragile right now," Eli says quietly but the house is so silent everyone can hear her clearly," This is a serious matter, Alexia and if it was anyone else's daughter, child services will have already been called."
Alexia looks down at the table, the same table she would be scolded at when she was young.
"Your father would be ashamed of you." Eli's words are hard and biting and it's exactly what Alexia wants, even if it causes a sharp pain in her chest. "This is not how we raised you. That little girl is so beloved by everyone and what you have done...I love you, Ale, but it is unacceptable."
"I know, Mama. Please, let me make this right."
"Bambi coming home is her choice. It is not a when...it is an if. If I decide that you are doing more harm than good then there will be other actions we can take."
She looks at Jenni, who up until this point has been silent and Alexia's eyes dart to her too.
"Mama, what are you talking about?"
"Eli," Jenni says," She is trying. We don't need to-"
"Jenni still has adoption papers," Alba says from her corner of the room," All they're missing is your signature. Mama is saying that if this cannot be resolved and Bambi doesn't want to come home..."
She lets the idea hang in the air. She doesn't need to say it out loud. They all know what she means.
"It won't get that far," Jenni says, looking at Alexia for the first time since all of this became real," Bambi loves you."
Alexia pushes through the lump in her throat and the tears pricking in her eyes. "If I cannot make this better then she will have the best chance with you."
Jenni looks away first. "She has ballet on Saturday until one. We can do a visit then."
"Thank you."
Olga is sitting with Jaume when Alexia gets home. It's an almost perfect image. All it's missing is you at Olga's feet, playing with your trains.
She can imagine it, your trainsets spread all over the floor and your ballet bag left abandoned on a chair. You will smile when you see her and Alexia will litter your face with kisses before doing the same to Olga and Jaume.
It will be perfect, Alexia promises herself.
"Hey, little man," She coos to her son, hefting him up into her arms and pressing a kiss to his forehead.
Jaume giggles at the affection, lips smacking together as his hand whips out to grab at Alexia's nose curiously. He's been a little fussy recently and extremely sensitive to changes in light but he seems a little happier now.
"That's my nose," Alexia says. She wiggles it. "Is it really funny? Huh? Is my nose funny?"
"Jaume seems to think so." Olga rises from the sofa and pecks Alexia's lips. "How was your mother?"
"Helpful."
"And Alba?"
"She was...Alba."
"And Jenni?"
"How did you-?"
"I am not blind or deaf, Ale. Your team gossips. Jenni has comes back to Spain for y/n."
"Amor-"
"I'm not threatened," Olga laughs," You broke up for a reason but even I know that a meeting of y/n would involve her. How was it? What did they say?"
Alexia manages a smile. "I can see her on Saturday, after ballet. There's a place where you can paint pottery nearby. I think I'll take her there."
"That's nice," Olga says.
"I..." Alexia's been floating in a happy bubble ever since she started to drive home. She doesn't want to ruin it but she has to know. "Did you have a think about what we talked about?"
Olga sighs. "I love Jaume," She says after several beats of quiet," Because he is mine, yes, but mostly because he is yours as well. And I love you so much."
Alexia doesn't like where this is going. "And Bambi?"
"I'm sorry, Ale, but I do not love y/n but...I think I could learn to because she is so much like you and I love you. I do not know y/n like I know you and Jaume. I want to though. I want her home with us so I can love her like I love Jaume. I am sorry if it is not what you want to hear but it is my truth and I hope that is enough."
Tears fall down Alexia's cheeks.
"It's enough. It's enough, amor."
Alexia spends all week waiting for Saturday. There are matches to prepare for and media commitments to do but you're all she can think about.
She wonders if she should bring you a new train to mark the occasion but the model train store has finally shut down and Alexia cannot get one for you in time.
Next time though, she promises herself that she'll got you a new train for your collection. Her palms are sweaty and she's nervous when she spots you and Jenni walking down the street hand-in-hand.
You're still in your ballet clothes but you've got one of Jennie's jackets on and it's dragging on the ground behind you because it's too big. Your hair is still done up in a bun and a few wisps fall down to frame your face.
"Bambi," Alexia says, suddenly breathless when you look up at her.
"Hola, Mami," You reply, ducking a little bit behind Jenni as you greet her.
"Your Mami and you are going to paint some pottery," Jenni says," And I'll be right here to pick you up when you're done."
"You won't be late?"
"Of course I won't be! You're my most favourite little girl in the whole wide world! I'd never be late to pick you up!"
You smile and giggle when Jenni peppers kisses all over your face before gently moving you towards Alexia.
"Hola, Mami," You say again.
Alexia smiles and takes your hand. "Hola, Bambi."
You look very nervous and your hand is unusually warm in Alexia's, though she puts that down to you coming straight from ballet.
There's a big wall where you can choose what to make. Alexia gets a mug and, unsurprisingly, you want the train. It's at the very top of the shelf and you can't reach and you don't want Mami to get upset at you for asking when you could easily get something that's closer to your height.
But Alexia notices.
She's making sure to pay a lot of attention to you now. To the way that your ballet pumps are wearing a bit at the soles and the way you play with the sleeves of Jenni's jacket.
"Do you want the train, Bambi?" She asks," Do you want me to pick you up so you can grab it? Can I touch you?"
You nervously nod and Alexia pretends to not notice the way that you don't breath until you're safely back on the ground.
The little shop is quaint and fairly quiet and Alexia lets you choose the table at the very back.
Very gently, she telegraphs her every move to you as she rolls up the sleeves of Jenni's jacket so you don't get paint on it.
You're both quiet as you paint.
Your little tongue is stuck out in concentration as you dip your paintbrush into the paint and move it to cover your train.
"You moved up in ballet," Alexia says eventually," How was that?"
"Was good," Is the response from your tiny voice," It is harder now but still fun." You blink a few times as the overhead light buzzes and you scratch at you neck. It's been a little itchy since you last saw Mami and you don't like.
You haven't told anyone because you're scared they're going to get angry at you. You're a big girl now. Big girl don't complain about something as silly as itchy skin.
"I'm very proud of you," Alexia says," And I'm glad that you're enjoying ballet so much."
Your watery little smile back makes Alexia nearly cry herself. "Really, Mami?"
"Of course. I am so proud of my Bambi. You make me proud everyday."
"Are you sure, Mami?"
"Yes. I am very proud of you."
You sniffle a little and duck your head back down to continue painting. It hurts to move your head though. It's all stiff and tight so you have to hold it at an odd angle so you don't cry - though you're not sure if it's because of the pain or the fact that Mami is acting like this is the Before.
The Mami from the Before never got angry when you asked silly questions. The Mama from the Now got angry at you once when you asked a silly questions when Jaume was crying.
You hope that this Mami won't be mad because you ask a silly question.
"Mami," You ask softly, the memory plaguing you ever since your Jenni returned to you," Jenni says she wanted me when I was little. Did you want me?"
Whatever bubble Alexia was in before pops and it's like icy cold water has been dumped on her.
"What do you mean, Bambi?"
"You and Miss Olga wanted Jaume," You say," And my Jenni says she wanted me. Did you want me too?"
"Bambi..." Alexia doesn't want to think about those first few months of having you. The post-partum depression had hit hard and Alexia could do little but deal with yours and hers basic needs.
She had loved you and resented you all at the same time and the guilt had weighed on her for months.
"I always want you."
You shake your head before wincing and returning your head back to its awkward resting position. "But did you want me then? When I was little like Baby Jaume and when I was in your belly?"
Alexia moves from her chair to kneel in front of you. Her hand comes up to cradle you. Either her hands are big or your face is tiny because they cover your entire cheek.
"I love you," Alexia says," You're my Bambi and I've always loved you."
"But did you want me?"
"Bambi..."
"Mami...Mami, I..."
Alexia doesn't want to lie but she also doesn't want to tell you either. There were moments, that first week she found out she was pregnant when she didn't want you. She hadn't been overjoyed at the prospective of you. She hadn't wanted her career to be derailed by something as silly as a child.
She doesn't want to tell you the truth because she knows that it will be damaging to you. You're not old enough to be told things like this. You're not mature enough to be told this kind of information and not have it linger and fester within you for years.
But Alexia's always valued honesty. She doesn't like lying but she had lied to you all your life. She doesn't want to lie again now even if it's about something like this. Adults cannot fault other adults for telling their truth but you are neither an adult nor can you understand what this means for you.
"I want you now," Alexia says instead," I want you when I go to bed every night. I want you when I wake up every morning. I want you when I score a goal and when I win trophies. I want you, Bambi."
You sniffle and scratch more insistently at your skin, your wrists this time.
"I miss you sometimes, Mami," You say," But coming back to your house is scary."
"Thank you for being honest, Bambi. You don't have to come home if you don't want to." Alexia forces down tears. "When I next see you, we should go and see Abuela and we'll explain things to you, okay?"
"Okay, Mami."
"Is your train done?"
Your train actually is done so Mami gives it and her mug to the lady who works there to finish off and you both walk outside.
"They should be done in a few days," Mami tells you," And then when I next see you, I'll give you your new train."
"Okay, Mami." Her hand is in yours and you think that is enough for today, pulling your hand away as Jenni turns the corner and lets you run to her.
"Hey," She laughs, swinging you up into her arms," How did it go? Was it fun?"
You don't answer, burying your face into Jenni's neck.
"I..." Alexia says," I think next time when should go to my Mama's...Conversations are...difficult sometimes."
Jenni nods. "I see," She says," Next week, maybe?"
The words are complete autopilot. Alexia hates what she's said the moment they're out of her mouth but they're completely out of habit and she doesn't even think before she speaks.
"We'll see," She says," I'll have to check my schedule." She clamps her mouth shut the moment she says them. "I mean- No, I meant-"
You look resigned, like you are so used to this that it barely effects you but Jenni looks furious. She hefts you up higher in her arms.
"Say goodbye to your Mami, Bambi."
"Bye, Mami."
"Hey...Wait, no, Jenni. I didn't mean-"
"Bambi needs to have a nap," Jenni says," She takes one right after ballet. We changed her schedule for painting today. I should get her home."
Alexia wilts, slouching her shoulders and curling in on herself. "Adios, Bambi. I love you!"
Jenni is already walking around and you don't offer your own I love you in return.
Jenni's steady steps feel nice as she walks you back to Tia Alba's. Your itchiness increases and you scratch more harshly at your neck.
"Ma-Jenni?"
"Yes, Bambi?"
"Can we have cuddles tonight?"
"Of course we can. I love cuddles with my favourite little girl. Are we having them on the sofa after bathtime or in bed together?"
Before Ma-Jenni came home, you slept with your Tia Alba. Now you sleep in the same bed as Ma-Jenni. She's big and strong and she holds you just right. She doesn't let you go the whole night. You go to sleep in her arms and you wake up in her arms.
"Bed cuddles please."
"I love bed cuddles."
You grin. "I love bed cuddles too!"
You scratch at your neck again and Jenni gently pulls your hand away. She frowns, swiping at your skin with her thumb a few times.
"You've got a bit of a rash there, Bambi," She says," We'll have to keep an eye on that."
897 notes · View notes
toshidou · 1 year
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lighthouse for a lost comrade . . .
Pairing // Simon 'Ghost' Riley x Reader
Word count // 4.9k
Tags // 18+ ONLY, AFAB reader, soft simon riley, written from simon's perspective, mild descriptions of injury and blood, hurt and comfort, aka simon finally allows himself to be looked after <3, he is a big boy with a heart that yearns to be loved you cannot convince me otherwise, the softest of smut, praise, you accidentally give ghost a 'sir' kink, reader calls ghost sir a couple of times because they're hot like that, unprotected sex (tut tut), creampie, a whole lot of swearing
AN // i love this man a ridiculous amount, so me writing nearly 5k about how much i love him was inevitable
AO3 link here
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Simon Riley is not a man who cares about his own health. In fact, his wellbeing never has, and never will be a priority to him. He has work to do, gruelling, gritty, gruesome work, it is beyond pointless wasting time even thinking about when he last had more than 3 hours sleep, or how long it’s been since he consumed anything other than cold military rations. In his defence, he’s never really had a reason to give a shit, he sees the hourglass whenever he allows himself to close his eyes; watches the sand slip rapidly through the cracks, counting down until his inevitable, most likely painful death. He’s living life on a timer, and he’s never had a reason to change that.
Until he met you.
You were a wide-eyed rookie, Laswell bringing you into the fold as a technician, a skilled hacker and mechanic who despite your innocent doe eyes, held lethal talents. He remembers so vividly, the way your head had cocked to the side as Laswell introduced you to the peculiar members of task force 141, remembers the way your eyes stopped on him. You showed not a single ounce of fear or hesitance, just pure unbridled curiosity. That same curiosity led you to asking him far too many questions, relentlessly prying to see more of the man behind the mask, to see Simon Riley, rather than ‘Ghost’. It should have pissed him off, he should have reprimanded you for your callousness towards your Lieutenant, but somehow you knew exactly which questions to ask, knew exactly when to stop and move on to other subjects.
Contrary to popular belief, Simon doesn’t hide his past, doesn’t try to use it to fuel the mysterious and mythical reputation he’s unwittingly built. It’s just that no one ever asks. Maybe it’s something about the skull mask, or the egregiously high kill count he sits so casually on top of that has people wary of ever approaching him. But you—you had no hesitation. You read him like a goddamn book every single time, and it simultaneously terrified and relieved him.
One glance and every secret he shoved behind his balaclava is left bare before you, leaving him with a vulnerable, gaping wound in the shape of a lifetime of trauma and tales that Simon knows no person should ever have to experience. And yet, your eyes hold not an ounce of pity, no awkward silences attempting to be alleviated with an awkward pat on the back and a “that sounds rough, buddy”. You see his past, his pain, his suffering, his bad habits, without him ever having to explicitly say anything. And in return, you say nothing. You don’t try and mollify him about circumstances he’s moved on from long ago, you make no effort to coddle him, to sit him down and patronisingly ask him if he’s doing well, or when the last time he slept was.
Instead, you leave him cutely packaged leftovers on his doorstep, easy meals he can throw in the microwave when he’s too tired to even comprehend making food. You buy him a multitude of jigsaws and puzzles for when sleep evades him as it so often does. You never once try to change him, never force yourself into his life just so you can claim that you’re some selfless martyr. To Simon Riley, you are nothing short of a blessing, and falling in love with you was quite frankly the easiest thing he’s ever done.
He takes off the mask for the first time when neither of you were prepared, nor expecting it. The mission had been so fucking rough, camped out in the middle of nowhere on the hunt for someone he was sure had long since gone. Weeks spent trudging through thick mud, swimming upriver, tracking footprints that led nowhere, steered them to no one. His bone-deep exhaustion finally caught up with him after being shot in the leg and falling nearly 75 metres off of a cliff, plunging into the water below. Price had insisted he go straight to the medic tent back at basecamp, but then simply sighed and shook his head, resigned, as he watched Simon limp off the chopper, and in the exact opposite direction.
To most, this would be the latest example of Simon Riley once again disregarding his health for the sake of keeping up the stoic, strong mask he never let slip. Yet this time, Simon Riley was not disregarding his health, he was, for maybe the first time, trying to preserve what little of it he had left. His leg was near numb by the time he made it to your tent, his foggy mind quickly soothed by the sound of you humming along to the radio, accompanied by the rapid clicking of keys as you worked on some coding. It takes him hissing in discomfort as he attempts to remove his military boots for you to turn around, eyes going impossibly wide as you watch an alarmingly large pool of red grow at his feet.
“Jesus Christ Ghost, are you trying to redecorate my floor?” He kept his mouth shut, using the last dregs of his energy to keep his gaze pinned on you, dark brown irises following your every move as you usher him into the chair you occupied merely seconds before, gingerly hovering your hands over the drenched material that clings to his thigh, soaked in blood and water.
“I’m going to cut the material above the wound, okay? I need to see what I’m working with here.” Your eyes connect with his unwavering gaze, translating his silence into a language that has taken you an eerily short period of time to become fluent in. He watches you nod to yourself, can pinpoint the cogs turning in your mind, can practically see you write the list of how best to deal with this situation as you unpack your first aid kit. Somehow, despite his leg stinging like a bitch, despite how utterly worn he feels, so raw and rough around the edges, he feels at peace.
Price may think he was a stupid bastard for not seeing one of their trained medics, but Simon knows without a doubt that you will always be the best thing for him, you will always be the first port of call, the lighthouse that guides him oh so safely to shore, to home. Even when your stitches are a little uneven, even when you dab a little too much alcohol disinfectant onto his wound, even when you wince every time the muscle in his leg twitches involuntarily, he watches you pour every ounce of care and tenderness into every touch, watches you take care of him in a way no one else ever could, not that he’d let them.
You’re finishing off wrapping up the wound on his thigh when Simon realises he doesn’t want this moment to be over. He selfishly craves more of your delicate, gentle care, unsure if he could ever have this again after tonight, if he deserved it.
So, he waits. He waits for you to lean back on your haunches, bending back to check your handiwork with a satisfied smile tugging at your pretty lips. He waits for your eyes to drift to his, as they so often do, and then he speaks.
“I uh, I got hurt here too,” The words grate against his throat like sandpaper, rough and unsure as he lifts his hand to prod at his cheek, “think I hit a rock in the water after falling.” You stand immediately, eyebrows furrowed together as your fingers gently brush the small rip in his mask.
“I can’t see much with this in the way, Ghost, though I think you’ll live.”
Simon couldn't pinpoint exactly what had his fingers hooking under his mask, couldn’t single it down to any particular moment or word that had him pulling the black material over his chin, and up past his nose, he just knew it felt right. All he focused on was the way your lips fell agape, how your hands lifted automatically towards his wrists, whether to stop them or encourage them further he didn’t know, but he sure as fuck clocked the slight tilt to your head, taking him immediately back to when you first laid eyes on him.
You were looking at Simon in a way he can’t say he’s ever experienced. Like a complicated mixture of guilt and awe. But he feels no fear, no regret as he throws the skull balaclava unceremoniously onto the floor, and directly into the pool of blood he’d left by the door.
“Should be a little easier to see now, don’t you think?”
All he gets in return is a small huff of a laugh, the ghost of your breath fanning across his exposed face, he swears he’s never felt anything as sweet. That is until your hand comes to cup his face, shudders erupting down his spine when the pads of your impossibly soft fingers brush just under the superficial cut on his cheek.
“I don’t know Si, I think we might have to amputate.” You murmur, an overly dramatic lilt to your voice as you pretend to further examine the ‘wound’. And Jesus fucking Christ, if he isn’t so impossibly, incredibly fond of you.
“That bad, huh doc?” He leans forward, just enough to catch the way your pupils dilate, the slight hitch to your usually even breath, “Are you sure there’s nothing you can do to save it? I’m particularly fond of that cheek.” He drinks in the soft hum you give in response, watches you with rapt attention as you lean further forward, and nearly passes the fuck out when you press your lips to his upper cheekbone, because what the fuck.
Before this, Simon Riley could say with absolute certainty that he’d never once blushed in his life, but now? He could feel the blood rushing to his face, knowing without a doubt that you could feel the heat radiating from where your fingers and lips remain connected to his skin. His wide eyes, blackened around the sockets from a mixture of paint and week-long exhaustion, remain firmly fixed on you, hardly hesitating before he secures your hand against his face the second he feels you pulling away.
There are no words exchanged, nothing but shallow breaths and searching eyes before Simon allows himself to be selfish just this once and pulls you onto his uninjured thigh, guiding you to sit with his other hand, fingers digging ever so slightly into the meat of your hip. And now he has you here, right where he’s always wanted you, there’s not a chance in hell he’s ever letting you go.
“Please kiss me, Simon.”
As if he could ever say no to you.
“Since you asked so nicely.”
He removes his hand from your wrist, dragging his scarred knuckles as delicately as he possibly can across your cheek, fanning out his fingers around the side of your face, using the leverage to guide you impossibly closer. He allows himself one last look, tracing his gaze from your lidded eyes to your lips before he lets his eyelids fall shut, and loses himself in you. Loses every ounce of tension and exhaustion under the ministrations of your fingers as they tangle into his hair, and finally, fucking finally, he feels his once cold, dead heart thrum to life as you sigh contentedly against his lips. Kiss of life in-fucking-deed.
He's lost in every inch of you, can’t get over how soft and warm the plush of your waist is under his fingers, how responsive you are when he slides his hand ever so slightly under your oversized t-shirt. He wants more, he needs more, can’t help himself as he moves his kisses from your lips, down your jaw, until he reaches the base of your throat, sucking deep purple bruises into your supple skin.
“You taste like heaven,” He’s all too aware of how raspy his voice has become, desire only deepening his tone further as he drags his lips back up the expanse of your throat, a deep groan pulled from his throat when he feels you shift on his lap, highlighting the growing pressure of his cock straining against his pants. “Driving me fuckin’ wild already. Look what you’ve done to me, gorgeous.” His fingers come to curl under your jaw, directing your gaze down to the prominent tenting of his trousers, ensuring his eyes don’t dare drift away from your face as he watches you take in the view before you.
“Mine.”
The noise Simon makes in response is nothing short of primal, it wasn’t a sound he was even aware he could make, near guttural, but of course you would be the one to pull it out of him.
“That’s right baby, all yours, fucking hell,” he’s powerless to stop his eyes squeezing shut when he feels your fingers curl around his clothed cock, mustering every ounce of strength he has left not to cum in his pants there and then, because he’ll be fucking damned if he lets anything get in the way of giving you the pleasure you deserve.
“Come on Si, look at me.” He takes a deep, shuddering breath before he finally opens his eyes again, instantly zeroing in on your fingers as they begin to unfasten his pants, before flicking back up to meet your gaze, “Is this okay?”, your voice tentative.
“More than okay, Jesus,” Simon wastes little time after that, hands sliding under your shirt and shifting further up your torso, muscles freezing when his hand contacts nothing but bare skin, grazing the flesh of your breasts.
“No bra? Lucky me.” You laugh, arching your back further into his touch.
“More like lucky me, those things are basically torture devices, Simon, I’d like to see you try and work with metal wire and straps digging into your boobs and back,” He grins, pinching one of your nipples between two of his calloused fingers and revelling in the way your smirk twists into a moan, hips twitching against the rough material of his cargo pants.
“I think it’s about time you took these off,” He mutters, one hand dropping to thumb under the waistband of your sweatpants, “Can’t tell you the number of times I’ve thought about how pretty you’d look getting yourself off on my lap.” Apparently, Simon doesn’t need to say anymore, watching with intense eyes as you pull away from his grip, and begin undressing. Your top joins his mask on the floor, soon followed by your pants and underwear until you’re stood in all your naked glory, mere inches away from him. Simon must be the luckiest son of a bitch on this entire fucking planet.
He takes advantage of your absence by lifting his hips, cocking an eyebrow at you as he gestures towards his trousers, “Give an injured soldier a hand, would you doll?” Truthfully, Simon knows he would have no issues removing them himself, but why would he do that when he can have this instead? When he can have your body pressed in between his thighs, your deft hands undoing his buttons and sliding the material of his military pants slowly over his wrapped-up leg, when he can watch your eyes drink in every inch of new skin revealed with barely contained desire. No, he would much rather have this, especially when your dainty hands peel away his boxers, leaving him only in his top and vest plate.
“Simon…” You whine, your lips so perfectly pouted, a cute little furrow between your brows as you pull and tug at various parts of his vest, “help me take this shit off. It’s not fair that I’m the only one naked here.” He hums, schools his face to show careful contemplation, reaching up a hand to rest on your bare upper thigh.
“What’s the magic word, sweetheart?”
“Please, sir.”
Well fuck. That awakened something within him.
With military precision, he unsecured the armoured vest from his body, wasting no time in pulling his shirt over his head, joining the now large pile of clothes left scattered across the floor of your tent. For a brief second, Simon feels so incredibly vulnerable under your intense gaze, wondering if maybe this is how people feel when he fixes his stare upon them, bare and defenceless. But then you lower yourself back into his lap, settling across both his legs with such gentle care, wrapping both your arms around the back of his head and pinning him with a look he thinks most likely reflects his own.
“You’re so beautiful, Simon,” It’s almost too much, the sincerity in your voice mixed with the way the words were uttered so softly into the air, as though they were a secret only to be shared between the two of you.
“I’m nothing compared to you.” You shake your head, smiling, leaning forward until your nose brushes his.
“Just take the compliment, Lieutenant.” He tries his best not to shiver as he feels your hand trace down his spine, instead shifts his focus onto how close your lips are to his, or the quiet noise you make in the back of your throat as his hands come to grip the meat of your thighs.
“Yes, ma’am.”
Something in the air changes, as though the collective patience between the two of you could stretch no further, so taut it had no choice but to snap. His lips crash into yours, desperation surging through Simon’s veins like wildfire. Fuck, what are you doing to him?
“Can I touch you?” he mumbles against your lips, large hands aching from where they rest, yearning the feeling of your wet heat against his fingertips.
“God, yes, please.”
With newfound strength, he lifts you from his lap and twists you until your back is flush to his chest, uncaring of the twinge of pain he feels from his leg as he settles you fully on his lap. Now, Simon has full access to every inch of your perfect body, nuzzling his face into the side of your neck as he litters the skin with open mouthed kisses, humming contentedly at the way you arch into his hands as he cups your breasts with both hands, fingers toying with your nipples until they’re perked and firm under his touch.
“No teasing, please,” Your pleading breaks him from a momentary stupor, bringing his head up to watch as you place one of your hands over his, guiding it further down, sweeping over your sternum, past your belly button, until his palm rests over your cunt, “I need you here, Simon.”
Fucking hell.
He couldn't find the words, couldn’t articulate them even if he had any. So, instead of speaking, he presses his hand over the curve of your cunt, groans when he feels just how hot and wet you are, all for him.
“Mine.” He repeats your words from earlier into the shell of your ear, a smirk stretching onto his lips at the full body shiver you give in response, growing near predatory when he feels your pussy twitch under his hand. God, how the fuck are you so wet? His fingers glide over your folds with ease, teasing your clit on every upwards swipe of his fingers, and when he finally dips his index finger into your cunt, he’s rewarded with the sweetest symphony. Breathy whines and whispered pleas of “more”, “deeper, Simon, please”, every request he happily indulges, now curling two fingers against your velvet walls, searching for the spot he knows will have you keening against his body. It takes a shift of his palm, the angle changing just enough to have you choking on a gasp, his other hand remains fixed to your breasts, pushing your chest down until you’re pinned against his body.
“Atta girl, feels good huh?” He slips a third digit in, cursing under his breath as he feels your pussy clamp down, twitching helplessly around his fingers as they continue to stroke relentlessly at your g-spot, “Gonna need you to cum at least once on my fingers before I give you anything else, baby.” He dares to steal a glance at your face, and is met with closed eyes, your mouth agape, and head thrown back onto his shoulder, you’re nothing short of a masterpiece. Your hands desperately grip onto his arms, nails digging sweet red crescents into Simon’s inked skin, as though the hold you have on him is the only thing keeping you grounded, and he feels positively fucking drunk on it.
You’re close, that much he can tell, and as much as he could absolutely keep you like this on his lap for another good few hours, he takes pity on your furrowed eyebrows and soft whimpers, removing his hand from your chest and placing his thumb into your open mouth. He doesn’t even need to instruct you as you close your lips around his digit and suck, your tongue eagerly lapping at the rough pad of his finger. He doesn’t have the strength to leave it there for much longer, overly aware of the way his cock desperately twitches from where it’s trapped between your bodies, instead focusing on the way you react the second his spit slicked thumb begins to rub tight circles around your clit.
“Si-, fuck, Simon ‘m close, so close, wanna cum,” There was never any other option for him than to watch you fall apart on his lap, but if he somehow needed further encouragement, “Please Sir, please make me cum.” It would be entirely impossible for him to stop the moan your words drag from his throat, to think of anything other than giving you your release. It’s obvious when your orgasm hits, having to stop toying with your now engorged clit to instead pin your hips down, worried there was a chance you might fall to the side if he didn’t keep you grounded.
“Good girl, such a good fucking girl, made such a mess of my fingers baby,” Simon hums against the side of your head, slowing his ministrations until he’s lazily fingering your still spasming pussy, drawing out the sweet sounds of post-orgasm sensitivity from your spit-shining lips. He waits until you finally regain some form of lucidity, waits until your neck straightens, no longer lolled against his collarbone to finally withdraw his fingers, soothing your whines at his absence with kisses to your jaw. But he makes sure your eyes are locked with his when he brings his fingers to his own lips, ensures you’re watching with nothing less than rapt attention as he cleans every drop of your arousal from his skin.
“Taste fuckin’ divine, princess.” Your head tips forward into your hands with a groan, and Simon couldn’t hide his pleased grin even if he tried.
“You’re not allowed to be this hot,” Your words muffled into your palm, the Ghost’s heart rate spiking when you looked at him shyly through your fingers, affection surging through his bloodstream like a shot of pure adrenaline. “Especially when I can feel your cock pressed against my ass.” As if he needed the reminder, as if that singular thought hasn’t been plaguing him for the past 10 minutes.
“And what exactly are you going to do about that, darling?”
His words were meant to make you shy, were said to watch those sweet eyes of yours widen. Except, Simon realises, he must have awoken something within you, something bold, something utterly fucking debauched, because instead of shying away, you lock your eyes with his, rising to the challenge he set. You stand up, turn yourself around, climb back onto his lap and sink down onto his cock in one fluid motion.
“Fucking-, shit, what the fuck,”
“I think that works for both of us, right, Simon?” You need to stop, or you at least need to give him some time to adjust to whatever the fuck it is you’re doing right now. He can tell you’re far from unaffected, however. The slight quiver to your voice, and the way the slick walls of your pussy clench greedily around him show at least that much. And yet, you’re pinning him with a fierce gaze, your fingers forming an iron grip on loose brown hair at the base of his skull, using him as leverage to grind your hips in circular motions. “Let me take care of you, handsome.” His response cut off by a groan as you begin to fuck yourself on his cock, his eyes frantically flicking from where your cunt swallows every inch of his shaft, back up to your heavy-lidded gaze, locked onto his as you effortlessly ride his cock.
So instead of trying to take the lead, to lift his hips to meet yours, for the first time ever, Simon Riley does as he’s told. He allows you to control the pace, lets you direct his hands to your waist, but doesn’t use it as a point of control. Instead he caresses your skin with rough fingers. He lets you take care of him. And God, does it feel good.
He lets his head fall back, lets his eyes slip closed, and allows himself to just exist in this moment with you. A luxury he hasn’t been able to afford for far too long. Instead, he focuses on the sounds dissipating into the air around your joined bodies, the soft pants and moans that spill from both his mouth and yours, the rhythmic slap of skin on skin combined with the slick noise of his cock fucking into your heat, and if he focuses hard enough, he swears he can hear the rapid beating of your heart where your chest is pressed flush to his.
“C’mon Simon, baby, look at me.” It takes an embarrassing amount of energy for Simon to lift his neck up, refocusing his gaze onto you, “You’re doing so well, letting me look after you like this.” And fuck, he doesn’t want to cry, can’t remember the last time he allowed himself the comfort of crying, but he feels so unequivocally safe around you. Still, the time for tears will come later, right now, Simon wants nothing more than to feel you lose yourself on his cock. He secures his hands on your ass, and stands, ignoring your surprised cries and worried scolding, and walks as best he can towards the mattress near your desk. He doesn’t want to admit that lowering you both down onto the cheap material nearly left him breathless, and he definitely won’t admit that you were right, he didn’t have the strength to do that. But now that he has you lying on top of him, cock still buried deep inside of you, he knows the pain was more than worth it. Because in this position, he can ground his feet into the mattress and focus on fucking you like you deserve.
He ignores the sting of pain in his thigh, no doubt ruining some of the stitching you had done earlier, but he couldn’t give less of a shit. Not when you’re mewling into his chest, nails scratching long, thin pink lines down the expanse of his chest as he fucks his hips ruthlessly up to meet yours. He knows he won’t last much longer, you feel too fucking good, and he has no strength to hold back, praying that you’re as close as he is as he snakes one hand down to toy with your clit once again. Relief washing over him when he feels your cunt clench like a vice around his length, allows himself one, two more thrusts of his hips before he finally reaches his peak, cock twitching like a heartbeat from where it’s buried within you, not moving until the last weak spurts of cum finish painting your cervix white.
“Fucking hell,” with his energy long since depleted, his body slumps into the mattress below, dragging you down with him, his arms still wrapped securely around your form.
“That good, huh?” You grin up at him, eyes glinting in the low light. You look positively stunning.
“You know it, sweetheart,” Simon pauses, looks down at where you’re still sprawled against his chest, and silently thanks the motherfucker who decided to shoot him in the first place, he’s not sure if he would have ever gathered the strength to have you like this, in the way he always craved. “C’mere, I want cuddles.” He grunts, choosing to ignore the surprised laugh you give in response, says nothing at your incessant teasing and light threats to tell Soap that “oh my god, Ghost likes cuddles”.
He does none of that, instead, he holds you close, stares up at the ceiling as you bury your face into his neck, whispering sweet confessions into his skin, words he soaks up and saves for a rainy day. Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley has never been a man to care about his own health, even now he still sees that damn hourglass, unsure of how much sand remains. But now he has a reason to change that.
Now, he has you.
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11K notes · View notes
shiplessoceans · 8 months
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Good Omens S2 Episode 6 confession scene speculation:
Aziraphale didn't respond to the love confession from Crowley because he didn't realise it was one until Crowley mentioned the Nightingale and kissed him.
Allow me to explain.
---
Aziraphale interrupted Crowley to give him the news from Metatron, so when Crowley starts his spiel:
"We've been together a long time, I could always rely on you...we're a group....we've spent our existence pretending we aren't...if Gabriel and Beelzebub can go off together then we can...we don't need heaven/hell they're toxic...you and me whatya say?"
Aziraphale interprets everything Crowley is saying as his rebuttal to the 'good news', not a separate declaration of his feelings.
What Aziraphale just told him shaped Crowley's confession, instead of finally telling Aziraphale how he feels about him, he's now backed into a corner and trying to change Aziraphales mind. Offering to run off with him as the alternative to the Metatron's offer.
The repetition of the phrase: "go off together" from the bandstand fight in season one feels very intentional here. It would be easy for Aziraphale to think 'this is just Crowley's response when the divine plan interferes, he always wants to run away'.
Aziraphale believes that he just needs to make Crowley understand the situation and opportunity that this is and everything will be alright:
"Come with me! To heaven, I can run it, you can be my second in command. We can make a difference!"
Crowley is looking defeated already, in his mind he's bared his soul and Aziraphale is a brick wall. So if he can't tempt the angel into staying with the love he has for him (which Crowley thinks he's declared but he really hasn't), he'll get him to change his mind by evoking something else he loves:
"You can't leave this bookshop."
Aziraphale scoffs fondly. 'Silly demon, you were just suggesting we run off together and abandon it only a moment ago!' He thinks Crowley is trying to 'work' him here and the old serpent might even be selflessly trying to spare the angel the loss of his beloved bookshop in order to restore Crowley and help the world, which would be just like him to be so covertly protective. So Aziraphale reassures him, a bookshop doesn't matter to him as much as Crowley and the world. It's just a collection of objects really. Humanity is more important. Crowley is far more important.
"Oh Crowley, nothing lasts forever."
Crowley is crushed. Nothing lasts forever. Not even the two of them. So he covers his sadness with his glasses, walls back up, and he tries to leave.
Aziraphale is baffled. He just reassured Crowley that he was alright with change if it means things could be better. Why is Crowley leaving? Is he worried that they won't spend time together anymore? That he won't have time for his friend as a supreme archangel?
"Crowley come back!....we can be together, angels!...I need you!"
Crowley can't even look at him in that moment. Why would Aziraphale say that? The two of them together only if he accepts heaven again? Conditional love? That's not fair. It hurts.
Aziraphale meanwhile is hurt by Crowley's turning away, his silence and a bit incensed at what he perceives as ingratitude. Aziraphale didn't really want to go back to heaven, but he'd do it if it meant Crowley could be happy and safe and Crowley doesn't seem to appreciate that:
"I don't think you understand what I'm offering you."
Crowley went through the fall. He asked the questions. Did his best to protect humanity and it has brought him nothing but suffering. He's well aware what's on offer. He's seen heavens cruelty and capriciousness firsthand and been burned by it repeatedly. How can Aziraphale choose them over him and still think everything will work out?
"I understand. I think I understand a whole lot better than you do."
Crowley loves Aziraphale's big foolish optimism and kind heart and he thinks it's the very thing taking the angel away from him. This isn't how it was supposed to go. It's all slipping away from him.
"Listen. You hear that?"
Aziraphale can't even keep up at this point.
This is what comes of thousands of years of 'not talking about it' and living under threat of holy retribution if they are discovered. They're talking past each other, having two different conversations. Obfuscation and code has become their communication medium by necessity and it's failing them.
It's frustrating Aziraphale that he can't get a grip on this conversation:
"I don't hear anything!"
And Crowley drops the bomb.
"That's the point. No Nightingale's."
Oh. Suddenly we're on the same page. You can see from Aziraphale's face that he understands to what Crowley's referring. The Nightingale in Berkely square. Angels dining at the Ritz...
"You idiot! We could have been... us."
Crowley's talking about the big unspoken thing between them. Their relationship, thousands of years of dancing around each other like binary stars gravitationally and inexorably drawn together over and over. The thing Aziraphale was beginning to be bold about, (dancing notwithstanding) before Metatron came along and distracted him.
And it seems to Aziraphale that gut-wrenchingly, Crowley is finally acknowledging their mutual love only to point out that it's gone. Lost. They could have finally been together, an us, but Aziraphale ruined it because he's an 'idiot'.
After being quietly in love with Crowley for years, for Aziraphale to have his offer to return to heaven together and his unspoken love rejected in one fell swoop is devastating.
Overcome, he begins to cry and turns away, not wanting Crowley to see how hurt he is.
Crowley for his part is desperate. He has to do something. Maybe Aziraphale doesn't understand what Crowley is offering him! One fabulous kiss and va-voom right?
In a final desperate act, he kisses Aziraphale. Tries for passionate. Tries to show him that he loves him and show him what they could be because his words clearly aren't working.
Aziraphale is shocked and angry. He wants to kiss Crowley of course. But not like this. Not as a taunt. Crowley just told him their chance is over so what else could this be but a final insult. A kiss to punish the angel. It's a cruelty he didn't believe Crowley capable of.
And despite how mean it is. It's also what Aziraphale has wanted for so long he can't help but melt into it for a brief moment. Allow himself to feel what it would have been like to be that close before losing it forever.
Then Crowley lets go and Aziraphale breaks away on a sob, feeling wounded. Hurt beyond words that Crowley would use his feelings against him like this, gutted to be losing the man he loves and not understanding why.
The worst part is that Aziraphale doesn't have it in him to hate Crowley, even if he thinks the kiss was a cruel gesture. He still loves him. So he gathers himself and does what Aziraphale does when someone hurts him.
He forgives.
"I forgive you."
I forgive you for rejecting my attempt to restore you and make you happy, I forgive you for rejecting God and heaven yet again, I forgive you for acknowledging our love and then rejecting it. I forgive you for kissing me, giving me a fleeting glimpse of what we could have been to each other. I love you and I forgive you all that.
Crowley is done. Breath knocked out of him on a last sigh. He tried. And the Angel forgave him yet again for something he never asked or wanted forgiveness for. He doesn't want to be penitent for loving Aziraphale. Shouldn't have to apologise or regret wanting them to be together.
"Don't bother."
Aziraphale looks surprised Crowley is leaving because he genuinely is. He can't understand how it's all gone so horribly wrong. He gasps, shocked and can't even call out to him to stop, come back.
He cries, touches his lips where Crowley had kissed him. Tries to gather himself and barely has 10 seconds before Metatron is back.
At the end of that scene:
Crowley thinks he confessed his love and Aziraphale chose heaven over him because he didn't want to stop being a demon.
Aziraphale thinks Crowley rejected heaven, then rejected Aziraphale and threw their love back in his face as a final unkindness.
Aziraphale leaves and goes to heaven anyway because in his mind he's already lost Crowley and there is nothing left to stay for. If he doesn't have Crowley he needs a new purpose and it's going to be saving the world. He'll convince himself of it. And he'll push that broken heart down and the pain will fade if he just smiles through it. It will be enough, to make heaven better. It has to be. Maybe if he proves that he can make a difference Crowley might see the error of his ways and speak to him again? Surely. Hopefully.
---
Both of them are hurt and confused and lost and oh dear hell I really feel for them.
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feyascorner · 4 months
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blurry eyes
summary. Orin takes Astarion as a hostage and you nearly lose your mind trying to get him back. Even when you do, things aren't the way they used to be.
warnings. angst/comfort
pairing. Astarion x GN!Reader
a/n. fluffier break from TFBU bec it's draining the soul out of me🧍‍♀️ this is kinda messy but for me orin always kidnaps lae’zel and Im glad it’s never astarion but what if;;;
You're not yourself. Everyone knows it. Not since Orin showed up at camp wearing Astarion's face, his own blood smeared on the poor imitation of the cheeks you love so deeply. She taunted you, smiling wickedly in a way that made your stomach churn before you lunged at her with a blade, only for her to vanish into a mist of red.
You usually prefer to use your silver tongue to get out of a dangerous situation. But now, all you want to see is her blood sprayed across a wall.
There are bags under your eyes, going days without sleep. You hadn't realized how accustomed you'd become to his arms cradling you in the dead of night, his cold hands wrapped around your shoulders and your cheek pressed against the crook of his neck. You hadn't realized how attached you'd gotten to him.
The fight is quick. Despite your companion's warnings to get some rest, you charged into Bhaal's temple the moment you had access to it, and rightfully so, because she didn't stand a chance against your wrath.
And now, even with him at your fingertips, laying so peacefully on a stone slab with his eyes shut, all you can feel is the adrenaline coursing through your veins. You gently touch his cheek, and you find that it's cold, as it's always been. There's a slice of a knife, surely to leave a scar if it's not treated well. You smile a bit, the first time in days, thinking of how he'd complain about the blemish a few weeks from now.
He finally stirs, and when his eyes peel open to your face, his face falls.
"Gods above," he whispers. "Stop with the damn tricks, Orin. I'm no fool."
Your heart breaks. And while all you want to do is wrap him in your arms and wipe away his frown, the adrenaline holding you together is long gone. You're exhausted, you realize, only managing to grab the edge of the stone slab before you crumple onto your knees, vision going blurry.
Ah, maybe you should have rested.
No, not when he'd been here to suffer alone, forced to face Orin's blood-thirst. Not when you'd smelled his blood on her blade.
You want to comfort him, but nothing comes through your throat.
The two of you don't speak much. He doesn't speak much to anyone, for that matter, for a few days. You can sense the uneasiness of your other companions, who don't dare ask what Orin did to him while you'd nearly lost yourself trying to get to him. You don't approach him, fearing he might recoil away.
The only thing you can do is watch over him while he writhes in his bed, drenched with sweat and nightmares you cannot take away. You're not even sure if they're about Cazador or Orin anymore, but you can't bring yourself to touch him or the healing scar on his cheek in hopes of soothing him.
It's only two weeks later when most of your companions have gone out, and it's just the two of you on opposite sides of the room. You rub at your blade with a cloth, numbly focused on sharpening it for a bigger foe while he's still reading his book in a silence that should feel comfortable but only makes your mouth dry.
"Hells, I can't do this anymore."
You blink as he strides across the room, and he's suddenly sitting next to you while you continue staring at him like he grew a mushroom from his head. "Do what?"
"We must talk about---well, you know, darling."
Even in this brittle stage of your relationship, the way he says your nickname is loving. It makes your heart squeeze.
You place the blade on the ground. "Okay. We can talk."
There's a silence that hangs in the air before he sighs. "Torture is not a foreign concept to me, my dear. If my years under Cazador's palace did anything for me, it's made my pain tolerance impossibly high."
You frown. This does not make you feel better.
He eyes you from the side, leaning back on both his hands. "What I'm trying to say is, you don't have to worry so much about me. Even if I were to perish, I'm sure there are other vampires willing to help you with your cause to defeat the Elder Brain, though they'd be considerably less charming."
You're immediately on your feet. "Of course, I was worried about you! And I don't care if you've gone through hell and back, pain is still pain, and I don't want to see or think about you even stepping foot into something like that, much less the temple of the Lord of Murder!"
He stands after you. "I didn't mean it like that."
"Other vampires?" you say in disbelief. "Well, I don't want other vampires, I want the one that I can't even sleep without."
Your eyes are glossy now, and you hate yourself for it. You should be consoling him, not becoming emotional over the torture that he experienced. But the words come out like vomit, and you can't stop yourself.
"Love, please don’t ruin your pretty face with tears,” he tries, hands awkwardly hanging in the air as he struggles to find what to do.
“Don't act like getting kidnapped isn't a big deal," you swipe at your eyes. "You won't even talk to us."
He blinks. "Me? Avoid speaking with you?"
"Yes!"
"Well, forgive me for giving you space. You looked positively demented after you were done stabbing that vile woman to the death, I assumed you needed time to recover before I could approach you."
"What? I was giving you space."
"I assure you it was the other way around.”
“You were avoiding me!”
“Because you were avoiding me!”
You're both just staring at each other now, at a loss of words for what turned out to be a miscommunication that should have been resolved days ago. The silence hangs thickly in the air, and a rush of emotions runs between you two, expressions shifting every few moments before they simultaneously become one.
He purses his lips to refrain from smiling. You stifle a laugh.
Then you're both laughing and while the topic of discussion does not warrant as such, you can't help yourself when days of ignoring one another have come down to such a minor bump between you. When both of you calm, you sigh again, this time in utter relief. "This was anticlimactic."
"It was," he confirms. "But this one time, I don't mind."
Wordlessly, you wrap your arms around his torso, burying your face into his chest while he returns the gesture by holding you tighter. You stand there a bit, quietly, until he clears his throat.
"For the record, I don't want you to go around searching for other vampires."
"Wouldn't dream of it."
You decide he can tell you more about what happened when the time comes, but now, you're more than happy the way you are.
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Text
They're Mates - with Y/N Pt 2
Summary - Feyre learns about Azriel and Y/N's story as she and Rhysand make their way to the prison
Warnings/Other Notes - Blood, injury, and physical abuse mentioned in this part. None of it graphic but please proceed with caution; 1.3k words; Again, these lines/plot points are inspired by, or directly quoted from, ACOMAF.
Part One
✨💫
Even days after the dinner, Feyre still had questions about Rhysand and his Inner Circle. Specifically questions about the spymaster, about the emissary. What was Azriel’s story? What was Y/N’s story? What were those burns from? If Y/N was Illyrian, why did she still have her wings? And the shadows…? Feyre shuddered at the thought. She fell asleep repeating those questions in the back of her mind.
The following morning, Feyre jolted awake to find Amren standing at the foot of her bed. She rubbed her temples as Amren made some comment about vomiting her guts up before throwing something onto the bed. “That got me out of prison. You wear it in––they can’t keep you.”
Feyre didn’t so much as move.
Amren leaned forward slightly. “Let me be very clear. This is not some toy. I do not give it lightly, but I’ll allow you to have it while you go to the prison and do what must be done. When you are finished,” Amren took a breath, “return it or suffer the very unpleasant consequences.” Amren was gone the moment Feyre had her fingers against the cool metal.
Feyre quickly dressed for her visit with Rhys to the prison. The questions still mingled in the back of Feyre’s mind, but the prospect of the prisoner dulled the curiosity.
“What?” Feyre asked when she noticed the High Lord looking at the amulet around her neck for the tenth time.
“She gave you that amulet,” Rhys stated.
“It’s serious, I suppose,” Feyre responded. “I, well, the risk––”
“You don’t want to say something you don’t want the others hearing,” Rhysand warned. “Those inmates have nothing to do but listen through the earth for information to trade for food or sex or even some air.”
Feyre didn’t respond as he offered his hand to her to help with a particular steep bit of rock. “I’m sorry about yesterday,” Feyre said as she took Rhysand’s hand. She referred to the inability to get out of bed after seeing the prison for the first time.
The High Lord shook his head. “There is nothing to be sorry about, Feyre. You are here now. And don’t worry.” He winked. “Your pay won’t be docked.”
They continued their climb until the upper face of the mountain was a wall before the pair. Below, Feyre and Rhysand could see the flow of the grass. Feyre’s gaze quickly shifted to Rhys when he pulled out a sword. He noted the look on Feyre’s face.
“Oh, don’t look so surprised,” he said.
“I’ve just never seen you with a weapon before,” Feyre responded.
“Cassian would laugh until he couldn’t talk if he heard that. Then make me spar with him.”
“Could you beat him?” Feyre asked. “Cassian I mean.”
“Hand-to-hand combat? Certainly not.” Feyre noticed the lack of pride and arrogance in Rhys’s tone. “He wouldn’t win easily, but he would win. He is the best warrior I’ve ever met, ever. The reason I’ve entrusted him to lead my armies.”
There were a few short moments of silence as Feyre thought. The other two. Azriel and Y/N. “Azriel, his hands,” Feyre questioned. “The scars, I mean. How did he get them?”
Rhys’s face darkened, a flicker of pain in his eyes as silence stretched for a moment. “His father, a lord, had two legitimate sons who were both older than Azriel. Spoiled. Cruel. Learned traits from their mother, the lord’s wife. For the first eleven years of his life, he lived under his father’s keep. The lord’s wife saw to it that Azriel was kept in a cell with no window or light. They let him out for an hour every day…only let him see his mother for an hour once a week. He was not allowed to train, fly, or doing anything else his Illyrian instincts screamed at him to do.” 
Another pause and Rhys’s voice softened. “When Azriel was eight, his brothers thought it would be fun if they mixed an Illyrian’s quick healing oil and…and fire. His father’s warriors heard his screams, but they found him too late. He was left with the scars from the burns.”
The image of Y/N gently kissing Azriel’s hand when she had met everyone flashed through Feyre’s mind, the action having a whole new meaning to her. But Y/N. She said she was Illyrian, but she also said Illyrians have a habit of ridding females of their wings. “And Y/N, her wings.” Feyre searched for the right words for a moment. “She is Illyrian, but still has her wings?”
The most subtle sigh escaped Rhys. “She is, she does. Her story is intimately tied with Azriel’s. She was born to an Illyrian family, who trained her from a young age to attract the attention of males to be able to produce another generation of warriors. When they were both eight, a few months before Azriel’s hands were burned, she was out and about when he was having his allotted time with his mother. His shadows took it upon themselves to go and say hello to the young girl. In hindsight, they likely realized the connection between Azriel and Y/N before either of them even considered it. Y/N interacted with his shadows before they returned to their master, whispering what she had shared with them.”
The image of the his shadows weaving through the edges of Y/N’s hair came into her mind’s eye.
“At some point his shadows starting sharing secrets about Azriel to Y/N. The shadows became a lifeline for the both of them, using his shadows to share messages with each other. She was the one to keep him company during those last three years of confinement. Despite there being no windows or light, the shadows found a way. When he was brought to the training camp where Cassian and I were, I suspect their messages to each other continued. Soon after my mother took Cassian and Azriel under her care too, Azriel’s shadows informed him that Y/N was in distress, in danger during the night. He didn’t have to think twice, he was flying out of our home in an instant.” Rhys shuddered at the next thought, the image of Y/N, bloodied and injured in Azriel’s arms that was long since buried came rising to the surface. “Azriel walked in to see her father in the beginning moments of cutting her wings up, to permanently destroy them. It wasn’t enough for her father to just clip them.”    
The thought setting a nauseating feeling into the pit of Feyre’s stomach.    
“I suspect that if Y/N was not so badly injured, Azriel might have had a go at her father, maybe even tried to kill him. My mother took her in too and by miracle saved Y/N’s wings. Azriel helped her learn to fly again after she healed. One of his shadows was always with her if he couldn’t be with Y/N himself. He taught her to how to defend herself. He adopted the name Y/N after she declared she did not want the name her father had given her. Y/N after the name of a bakery in Velaris she adored. Their mating bond snapped about a year later. Neither of them hesitated to accept it. During the war they rarely saw each other, using the bond to communicate, to ensure the other was alive. She managed a few short, brief meetings. Azriel is my spymaster because he can infiltrate courts undetected, gather information, keep tabs on our allies and enemies. Y/N is my emissary because her ability to take the information Azriel has gathered and use that charm she has to gather allies is, invaluable.”   
The truth that Rhys would not share, at least not yet, was Azriel and Y/N’s story was the one that gave him an inkling of hope with Feyre. Both Azriel and Y/N were scarred, beaten down by the world, torn apart, but they always found their way to back to each other. All Rhysand could do was hope that the same would eventually be true for himself and Feyre.
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joonsytip · 3 months
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Say Don't Go || Wonwoo
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Synopsis: You say you love him but Wonwoo says nothing back.
Word Count: 0.7k
A/N: Just one of my self indulging thoughts.
Sequels : So It Goes | All Too Well
[ SVT Masterlist ] [ SVT Flick - Fic Masterlist ]
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"I like you, a lot. I have had feelings for you since the university days. Been quite a few years."
Silence looms upon the atmosphere. There's a very neutral expression on Wonwoo's face, he isn't surprised.
Your grip on the clutch tightens, "Seems like you already know and you're not gonna say anything now?"
Wonwoo stares at you unwavering. He asks, "What do you expect me to say? That I like you as well?"
"Don't you?", you step forward, closing the gap between you two, "Tell me I read the signs wrong."
There's a slight change in his demeanor, his eyes flash something you should never witness so he looks down in the pretense of fixing the tie.
"Your family consists of conglomerates including yourself. I'm just a secretary who works for Seungcheol. Both him and his wife are your friends. You all belong to the same circle, I don't.", Wonwoo painfully narrates.
"It doesn't matter, as long as you reciprocate my feelings.", your voice falters, "Please think through."
"Easy for you to say. Do you even know how hard it is for people like me who aren't born rich? People already think I'm leaching off Seungcheol and if we get together there's no end to it. I'm used to it but you won't be able to take it even for a day because you're sensitive."
"If you know that I'm sensitive then why are you hurting me now?"
"It's better to get hurt now then to regret it later. You're not a teenager anymore, stop acting like one.", his words cut sharp at you.
"If all that matters to you then what about my feelings? It seems that they're the only ones those doesn't matter.", you wipe the tears streaming down your face, "Do you even know how hard it was for me to muster up the courage to be here. I am so used to liking you in silence that it made me back out every time I thought of confessing to you."
There's nothing Wonwoo wants but to run to you, engulfing you in his embrace. He wants to kiss away your tears, he wants to murmur sweet nothings in your ears.
He has always been wary of his financial background, more because he only has a brother who's sick and hospitalized. He's scared because he's seen the conspiracy Seungcheol's father plotted against his wife making them part ways back then even though she herself is a heiress. He has seen his friends suffering to no extent. To him rich people are selfish and wicked.
He couldn't afford to hurt you, doesn't want to fall prey to the rich and influential when there's already a lot on his plate. So he resorts to holding himself back, like he always has.
"Don't you like me? I know you do..."
Wonwoo exhales heavily, "No, I don't like you. Sorry if I have ever given you mixed signals but that was never my intention."
"Don't do this please because I'm serious, I might be in love with you--"
"You should leave.", he speaks not looking in your eyes, "There's no point having a baseless conversation."
"Are you sure? Because I'd stay forever if you say don't go."
"Just go Y/N. And please don't do this ever again. It was very uncomfortable for me."
You sniffle and nod your head understanding, "I'm sorry, just forget that this ever happened."
Just as you turn and make way to head out, all the memories flashes. The butterflies in his stomach when you both had teamed up for a fest event in university. When you smiled so bright at him always making his heart flutter. When at every party he searched for you because you're the reason he attended those in first place . When your drunk self bravely clung on his arm pulling him close and leaning on his shoulder at the seashore in comfortable silence while others drenched themselves in the waters at a spontaneous trip. You're his serotonin boast, you're his paradise in gloom. But he would never say the truth, never say out loud that it's not only you but he might love you as well.
After he ensures you're out of his sight, faraway, he collapses on the ground, gasps in pain. The glass falls from his face breaking in pieces like his heart is, filled with sheeting cracks. He has become a terrible mess.
"I like you too, Y/N.", he confesses in tears to the void which you had occupied till few moments earlier.
But you're not there to listen.
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seospicybin · 6 months
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DON'T THEY KNOW IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD?
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PART I
Lee know x reader. (s,a)
Chapters: Part II
Synopsis: Making a contact with an ancient object, you meet a demon who takes form of the man you desired and forces you to commit terrible acts to stop the world from ending. (14k words)
Author's note: I indulge myself with a spooky fic and demon Minho in it. Read with cautions and enjoy x
Based on an episode of Black Mirror. Content warnings: Violence, gore, mentions of abuse, assaults and graphic imagery. Reader's discretion is advised!
"Carving is easy. You just go down to the skin and stop." - Michelangelo
-
Oh, no! You're doing it again.
When you think you're talking in your head, you're actually talking loud enough for everyone in the room to hear. It's even worse that your voice is echoing in the big chamber of the empty gallery.
They seem to not care about it or pretend to because Kim has just walked in to check everyone's work. She's your friend from art school turns an art dealer and she has a way to control everyone around her.
"I told you to let us do it for you," she says, clicking her tongue at you and crossing her arms in front of her chest.
The gallery is having some of your pieces of art displayed for the exhibition tonight and you want to make sure that they're presented the way you envisioned it.
You carefully step down the ladder and stand next to Kim, looking at the sculpture you made of a man holding an arrow with an apple stuck at the end of the arrow.
You hear Kim dreamily sigh then look at you, "You're going to sell..." She pauses to emphasize the word she's going to say next, "Big!"
Money isn't the reason why you create these sculptures but you need it in order to keep being able to do this. You have no idea how expensive a block of stone is!
The reason why you made these sculptures is because this is what you love doing: envision your imagination onto a block of stone and you carve it to bring it to life.
Why did you choose stone as the medium? Because they're durable, stubborn yet resilient. It takes time to create one sculpture but once you've seen the result, you forget about the hard work behind it.
Kim puts her hand on your shoulder and snaps you out of your reverie, "Stop worrying about your sculptures," she says.
She turns you around to force you to face her and puts her other hand on your shoulder, "Go home. Get dressed. Put some color on those cheeks. Have a pre-party with a glass of wine or two."
Dressing up sounds like a lot of work, you'd rather stay in your dungarees and striped top, "Can I just wear these?"
It's like she has just heard someone dies, Kim's hand flies to her temple and screws her eyes shut for a second, "Trust me when I say that the people coming tonight wouldn't expect the artist behind these magnificent sculptures to look like Chucky," she says with a sneering smile.
She squeezes your shoulder and tilts her head to the side, "And that's me putting it the nicest way possible because you're my friend."
It's still a mystery how you ended up friends with someone like Kim, she's the opposite of what you are, an extrovert, a tolerable narcissist, she likes attention and is forthright to the point it's borderline insolent. You're so used to her audacious way of treating you and the blunt words that come out of her red-lipped mouth.
She's been like this even before you met her and you are the friend who likes to suffer in silence, you think that's why you became friends. Nevertheless, Kim treats you better than she treats anyone else for that matter.
That explains why the gallery staff are so afraid of her. It's always best to get out of her way unless she wants you to be there. You pick up your bag from the floor along with your jacket.
"I'll go then," you meekly say.
She grabs your elbow before leaving, "Go home," she says with a glare.
"Home. Not your studio," she says again, making it clear to you.
She knows you well enough to know that you like spending your days in your studio instead of your apartment. You sling the strap of your bag on one shoulder, "Go home. Get dressed. Come to the exhibition late," you repeat the things she wanted you to do.
Kim smiles and gently cups your cheek, "Good girl. Now go!"
Once you get home though, you spend hours just sitting in the emptiness that lingers in your apartment that is too big for one person to live in it.
This is why you prefer to stay in your studio, you like to keep your head occupied rather than being alone with your thoughts like this.
And your thoughts, they're mostly of unkind things and...
Your phone rings from inside your bag and steers your mind back to your head. Without having to look at it, you can tell who it is. There are no other people who call you daily except, well, if it's an emergency call.
"Are you getting ready yet?" Kim goes straight to the point.
"Uh... yeah, I just showered, I—" you jolt awake from lying down on the sofa.
"I'm having problems picking what to wear," you add a laugh in the hope of sounding convincing.
There's a wave of laughter from her end of the phone call before Kim talks to the phone, "Stop joking. Do you like it?"
You get completely confused because she suddenly compliments herself out of the blue, "Huh? What?"
You can hear her dramatic, low sigh and you can imagine her subtle eye roll as she's doing it, "The dress. The one I hung in your closet," she tells you.
You quietly trudge your way to the closet and open it to find the said dress.
"Yes, it's beautiful!" You hurriedly say, not wanting to let her get suspicious as she waits for a response.
"Aren't you lucky to have me as your friend?" she exclaims, sounding so confident with her words.
"I am the luckiest," you tell her as you observe the dress and already regretting hastily approving the dress as you notice it has a plunging neckline.
"I know," she brags and her smirk flashes through your head.
In the background, you hear something is calling her and Kim answers with a shout, "I'm coming."
She dramatically sighs before talking to you, "Work is calling. I'll see you tonight, okay?"
"Yeah, sure, see you tonight!" You're more than relieved to end the phone call with her.
It's too early to celebrate as she hasn't ended the call yet and she always ends the call first. You have an inkling that she'll call your name.
Indeed, she is.
"Hey, don't forget to take your meds, okay?" She says.
That's probably the only yet the most endearing thing she does to you and what makes her your friend.
"Yeah, don't worry about it," you tell her.
It's time to fully assess the dress and you're in awe of how much skin you'll show if you're wearing this. Of course, you have the option not to wear but it all comes down to wearing the dress or facing Kim's wrath.
The former seems to be the safer choice and also because you're not a confrontational person, you like to avoid conflict.
Not wearing the dress means you're going straight into conflict and you don't want that.
With a defeated spirit, you put the dress on even though you have no idea how to move in such a tight dress. You summon up your below-average make-up skill for tonight and put some colors on you.
Not forgetting Kim's words, you take your medicine and wash it down with a long gulp of water. You give yourself a few minutes as you wait for the medicine to work while you sit on the couch holding a glass of water in both hands, staring out at the view from your apartment.
Kim insisted you take this apartment when you're okay with living in the studio. Not only that it's too expensive of a place to live on your own but a big place only makes you inexplicably lonely.
However, after seeing the view from up here, you feel like you're not part of this world in the most humbling way. Seeing the city and the buildings look like pieces of block makes you realize that they don't matter that much. They're all just... material things.
You sigh as you get hit by a wave of melancholia and you take it that the medicine is working.
-
Uncomfortable walking out of your apartment in your dress, you put on a coat as you leave the apartment with the sounds of your heels clicking against the floor.
The owner of the building passed away yesterday, there are so many guests visiting the penthouse where he lived. The first elevator that arrives on your floor is crowded so you skip on getting on that one. You patiently wait for the next one to arrive while clutching your purse in front of you.
A minute later, the other elevator arrives and the doors slide open, you see there's someone else inside. You believe he's been from the penthouse from how he dressed in all black.
You look down to avoid eye contact and step inside, standing at the back of the limited space while trying not to look at the man's face on the reflection from the mirror that walled the elevator.
Arrived in the main lobby, the elevator dings open and the man doesn't waste time but walks out with hands shoved inside his coat pocket.
You fix your coat before stepping out and you feel your feet kicking on something, it's clattering across the floor. You bend down to pick it up, something that you guess is a pocket watch.
Your first thought is that it belongs to the man and you look around to see if he's still around to give it to him, but he's nowhere. It's as if he's gone with the wind.
"Miss, your driver has been waiting outside!" The concierge informs you from behind his desk the second he sees you.
"Yes. I'm coming!" You hurriedly shove the pocket watch inside your purse.
As Kim instructed, you come late to the exhibition and it's already filled with people dressed so impeccably for the occasion. You take a deep breath before entering the scene that is the least you wanted to be.
You take your coat off and hand it to the girl handling the coat check, along with your purse. You feel naked even though you're not, but it's not just the dress, being in the crowd is not your forte.
The first thing to do in a situation like this is to find Kim. You avoid making contact with everyone you're walking past as you look for her in the crowd. It's not hard to spot her when she's always the center of attention anywhere she is.
"There she is!" She gasps the moment she sees you're coming her way.
She puts away her champagne flute and walks up to you, embracing you like the trophy you are, "My rising star!"
Kim puts her hand on the small of your back and smiles brightly while discreetly judging your look.
"Isn't she amazing?" She brags you off to the group of people she's talking to.
You can only sheepishly smile next to her and avoid everyone's eyes.
"She is the artist behind those magnificent sculptures," she adds with that saccharine smile of hers.
They're starting to throw praises at you and you can hear all of them talking at once, making you more uncomfortable staying in there.
You take a step back but Kim's hand does not allow you to escape, she glances at you and takes the cue.
"Excuse us," Kim says to everyone, "Enjoy the exhibition!"
Kim steers you away and pulls you aside, before you can comment on her choice of dress, she snatches the chance from you.
"You could've picked nicker shoes," she whispers through her gritted teeth at you.
You automatically look down to see your heeled shoes which you think match the dress you're wearing.
"I–I think it's—"
She cuts through your words, not giving you a chance to explain. She grabs you by the elbow, "We have no time to change it," she says, then steers you somewhere.
As Kim continues to brag you around like you're the art piece instead of the artist, you start to get that feeling that she's using you.
As a matter of fact, she used you to propel her career as an art dealer. Ever since you agreed to let her sell your art for you, her career took off.
You're more than happy to be of help but she does everything extra and she's been taking you to meet a lot of people that their faces started to blur and it's getting overwhelming that you need to get out of it.
"I'll just—" You barely finish your sentence when you walk away and find somewhere to gain some composure.
You keep walking until you find the restroom and push yourself inside, lock yourself in one of the stalls just sit on the toilet, and just breathe.
You hear the ruckus outside the stall and someone probably needs to use the toilet, you reluctantly get up to start heading outside.
The plan to leave unnoticed comes to a failure when Kim is already there right outside the restroom, "Where have you been?"
You take a deep breath to calm yourself and try to explain, "Kim, I don't think I can do this anymore. I—"
Then again, she never let you finish your sentence, "One more. I need you to meet your new potential buyer."
You grip the side of your dress and you feel like tearing it apart, "No, Kim. You know how I do with people, I don't— I just want to go home," you desperately tell her just to let you go when you're an adult and can do whatever you want.
Kim lets out an exaggerated huff and sends her fringe flying off her forehead, crossing her arms in front of her and you know what's coming for you.
"You think I'm doing this for me?" She asks.
Actually, yes. The initial plan is to sell your art but in the end, she makes it all about her.
"I'm doing it for you!" She says, turning it all on to you. She always finds a way to turn it all on to you, making you feel guilty and defeated.
Talking back to her means that you're saying yes to war and you don't want to fight a losing fight. You fist the fabric of your dress trying to suppress the anger brewing inside you.
"Just one more person," you meekly say.
Her face softens at the sign that you're once again giving her the power, "That's right. Just one more and I'll let you go."
You finally let go of your dress and you wipe your sweaty palm down the back of your dress as she guides you back to the gallery.
"All you have to do is stand next to me, smiling and explaining your art to people," Kim instructed like that wasn't what you've been doing all night.
Except that she forgot that you need to fake all of that.
Kim takes you to one of your sculpture displays and three people in suits have been waiting, talking with drinks in their hands.
"Hello, gentlemen," Kim says with an extra polite voice that makes you shudder at how fake she sounded.
"Heard you're looking for the amazing artist behind these beautiful sculptures?" She continues, presenting you like you're the one who's about to get sold, not the sculpture.
One of the three seems to be the one in charge with a stance that oozes confidence and power, a smirk that only someone who grew up with a silver spoon stuck to his mouth can master. He looks years older than you but his face shows no fine lines but that's just because he never had to frown in his life.
"I adore your art so much," he praises with a teeth-baring smile.
Kim turns at you and introduces him, "This is Nicholas de Ville from the de Ville family."
The way she enunciated his last name only means that this person holds importance and she expects you to impress him.
He holds his hand out next with an expensive, shining wristwatch decorated his wrist, "I'm Nicholas de Ville. You can call me Nick."
He may seem nice and polite because all privileged people learn manners but they only apply that lesson in real life occasionally.
You take his hand or else Kim will force you to do it. You shake his hand for a while and accidentally meet his gaze as you try to take your hand back.
"It's a pleasure to meet you, Mr. de Ville!" You say as politely as you can.
"Nick, please!" He insists with a smile.
"And the pleasure is all mine." He adds with a smile that says so many things and they send a chill down your spine.
Kim lets go of her hand and lightly touches you on your arm, "Mr. de Ville wants to know more about your sculptures so..." she quietly pushes you his way.
Nick courteously laughs and says, "Would you be kind enough to give me the tour?"
You consider it for a moment but seeing Kim's glare, you know you have no option.
"Yes, sure, I would love to," you answer with a strained smile.
"Great! Please, lead the way!" Nick says.
When you think the other two are coming with you, it's just you and Nick, walking through your sculptures and you explain each one without trying to bore him like Kim has taught you a few times.
"... it's inspired by the Greek mythology. The apple in the arrow means that when it comes to love, we know no rules, we follow our desires—"
Nick is too busy looking at you instead of looking at the sculpture you're tirelessly explaining to him. Guessing that he isn't interested, you stop talking altogether.
"I'm sorry if I'm rambling," you sheepishly say to him and keep looking at the sculpture.
"No, no, that's okay," Nick says with a smile and takes a stand close to you, also looking at the sculpture.
"Your art is as beautiful as you," he says.
You're getting uncomfortable at how close he is with his elbow brushing yours. You nervously swallow air and lowly mutter, "Thank you."
Nick takes it the wrong way. He takes it that you're replying to his flirtation when you thought he was earnestly complimenting you, he starts to place his hand on your shoulder.
You reflexively shrug his hand away but that only sends his hand down to your back where he can touch your exposed skin. As his fingers make contact with your skin, you take a step back until his hand drops.
"I'm sorry," you regret apologizing for something that you didn't do wrong.
He looks at you as if he didn't just do something wrong or touch you without your consent. You feel repulsed by yourself and take another step back, "I'm sorry, I just need to—"
You keep walking away, away and never looking back.
-
The musty smell and dust that hang in the air welcome you to the studio.
You take your dress off the first thing you do when you get there and put on any clothes you can find in the dresser, a black T-shirt and worn-out jeans.
You put your earrings inside your purse and the pocket watch you collected earlier spills out of it, falling onto the couch.
You're intrigued to see inside the locket to get a hint on who the owner is, you're trying so hard to open it with the strength you have but it won't budge.
Exhausted from trying to open the antique-looking object, you give up and walk over to the sculpture you're working on. You put the pocket watch down on the table next to your carving tools, then pick up a chisel and a hammer.
For every hit of the hammer, you feel like unleashing something that makes you feel lighter and lighter and makes you hit the chisel harder and harder.
You eventually get exhausted and take a step back, leaning against the table while looking at the unshapen block of stone in front of you.
You grope around for a bottle of water and take a sip, putting it down as you wipe your mouth after. Your fingers nudge something as you place your hand on the table, it's the pocket watch blinking under the fluorescent light.
It seems to be calling for you, inviting you to try and uncover the mystery inside.
Looking at the small chisel next to it, you decide to give it another try by prying it open with the chisel. You slip the sharp end in the crack and use your strength to push it open only for the chisel to slide to the slide, cutting the side of your finger.
You drop the pocket watch as blood drops from the wound onto the table. It's not the first time you injured yourself, you know what to do. You go to the bathroom, wash your finger under the running water then grab your first aid kit from the drawer.
After tending to your small injury, you decide to not continue working when you're angry. You take another sip of water and lie down on the couch.
With the quiet that hangs in the room, you slowly drift into sleep.
-
SEVEN DAYS TO THE END OF THE WORLD.
The darkness greets you even though you have opened your eyes.
Pretty sure you kept one of the lights on when you went to sleep but it's all dark now in the room, you can't see anything but lights that shine through the cracks of the blinds.
You slowly get up from the couch to turn the light on, carefully walking to where the switch is, and once you flip it, lights flood the room.
The first thing you see is the pocket watch that is now open, you walk over to the table and pick it up to see inside that it's just a normal watch but it doesn't have numbers on it like all watches have.
You close it and see that your blood tainted the lid, this time, you can easily open it without a hassle.
"Hello!" A voice says.
Surprised to hear a voice coming from it, you drop it back onto the table. A moment later, you laugh it off, thinking that you misheard it considering that you just woke up from sleep.
With hesitancy, you pick the pocket watch again and look at it. Your thumb wipes the glass cover of the watch.
"Hi, Hello, I'm Minho. I'm a demon. You anointed this talisman with your blood so now we're bound together and—"
It speaks again and in response, you hurl it across the room until it hits the wall and drops onto the floor. You stand there, frozen on your feet, and wonder...
"Look, I've got a whole introductory speech here," the voice says again, coming from the part of the room where the pocket watch is.
For protection, you stand behind the open bathroom door and look at the pocket watch talking like a lunatic you are.
"We got to work together," it says.
You whimper hearing the voice again and you know that it's real, you're not making this up.
"Can you pick me up? Just pick me up. Come on, pick me up! Please?" It demands.
You take cautious steps to get to where the pocket watch lies on the floor.
"That's it, come on. Come on. I won't bite, I promise. Come on," it says as if it could see that you're coming to pick it up.
You swallow air and slowly bend down to pick it up from the floor, holding the pocket watch in your hand.
"As I was saying, you anointed the talisman and the rules are you've got to carry out three human sacrifices over the next seven days or else the world is going to end," it speaks again.
That's a lot of information to take in, not to mention that you're already having a hard time wrapping your head around the fact that the pocket watch is talking to you.
"W-what?" You breathlessly say.
"If you want me to help you, you need to permit me entry."
Entry? That sounds like a bad idea. You just stand there and look at the pocket watch.
"Do you permit me entry? Yes or no?" It asks.
You shake your head and convince yourself that maybe it is not real.
"You have to say yes. Just say the word yes."
This is not real, you tell yourself out loud.
"Or let's do this, if you say yes, I'll... I'll stop, okay? I'll go away. You'll never hear from me again like this didn't happen." It persuades.
This is not real, this is not real, you chant in your head.
"Just say yes. Say it! Say it. Say it. Say it," it chants louder and it starts to fill your head, endlessly echoing.
You want it to stop so you impulsively say, "Yes."
The chants stop and the light flickers off, filling the room with darkness again. You whimper in fear as the pocket watch starts ticking in your hand.
You hear something deeply breathing a few feet from behind you. Curious, you spin around on your feet to see what it is, but you can't see it as it's lurking in the dark
However, you feel good about not being able to see it as fear creeping up inside you. You walk backward until you hit the wall behind you.
"Hey, come on, what's the matter?" The thing says as he takes a step forward, revealing his form to you.
The first thing you can make out the shape of that thing is two long horns on his head and two red eyes.
"All right. I lied about going away," he says in a deep, growling voice.
"My regular appearance is a bit too much for this realm."
He takes a step back and disappears in the dark. After a while, he takes another step to the front and has already taken a different shape. He looks normal now, as in looking like a human and not just any human, he looks like...
"I peered into your soul and apparently, this is a physical look you find appealing so..." he says with his arms spread out and a proud grin on his face.
"I don't know. Let me have a look!" He walks over to the mirror hung on the wall next to you.
He looks just like the sculpture you made, he has a sharp nose, chiseled jaws, and a hair color as intense as red roses go. You feel a mix of fear, awe, and confusion inside and it's getting overwhelming.
He leans close to the mirror and fixes his hair, "Wow!"
He seems impressed by how he looks, "Okay, isn't it what you want?" He turns to you.
Not getting an answer from you, he smiles, then says, "Uh... I mean, I can work with this."
You can only whimper with your mouth parted open, having a hard time wrapping your head around this situation. If it's happening or not, is he real or not, did you take your meds or not?
"You have to calm down so we can talk. Just talk to me!" Minho says, noticing that you're in a state of panic.
For a split second, you see his eyes flash like those belonging to feline creatures, gleaming like two marbles in the dark. You can feel cold sweat on your back as you slump down against the wall until you're sitting down on the floor.
He squats down in front of you and reaches for your head but you're quick to dodge away from it.
"You know, we have got to work together," he assures you.
It's not fair that he has a face that came from your imagination, it gives you a sense of familiarity that lures you to give in. However, you're not sure if you should be giving in to him.
You bang the back of your head to the wall, close your eyes, and repeatedly chant like it's a mantra, "You're not real. You're not real. You're not real."
But that is not enough to expel him. You open your eyes and still find him there. hand and a grin.
"Like I said, we have got to work together," he tells you again.
To give you the space to gather your thoughts, he walks around the studio while talking, "You marked the talisman. I don't make the rules."
With the lights turning back on, your eyes can easily follow his figure going around the room and looking at the sculpture you're working on.
His fingers slowly graze the rough surface of the carved stone and then he turns his head at you.
"Basically, we need to deliver three human sacrifices by next Friday or else it's..." he informs you again as if you haven't heard him the first time, "burning skies time."
You can feel anxiety rising inside you and your throat is closing up, making it harder for you to breathe.
"I sense you need convincing. Uh..." Minho walks up to you again and offers his hands to you.
You look at his hands for a moment before letting him help you to get up from the floor. You imagine your hands reaching for fragments of your imagination but instead of that, you feel his warm skin and firm grip as he hoists you up until you're standing on your feet.
If he's not real then how can you hold him?
He looks at you for a second to make sure you're okay then nods, "Let me show you how this will play out, alright? What will happen if we don't succeed," he says.
He walks to stand behind you and puts a hand in front of your eyes, "You ready?" He asks, his hot breath fans your neck as he speaks.
You're not sure what he's asking you to get ready for. You're not even sure if you're living the reality right now.
"Ready?" He asks again and once again his breath tickles your ear.
"3, 2, 1!"
As if you're being transported to another time and place, you open your eyes to see fire. It's the studio but it is on fire.
"This is what we're dealing with!" Minho says but you can't see him anywhere.
Fire is everywhere and you can feel the heat of it burning your skin and thick smoke filling your lungs that you start coughing, retching for air.
"Scorching wall of flame. It's agonizing death for all and so on," he continues.
You're flailing around to get air, walking to the window to open it only to find it hot to touch and you see that the whole city burns with you. You hear people screaming and sirens blaring everywhere but anywhere you look, it's just blazing fire.
You get away from the window until your back hits the table behind you and snaps you back to reality. Your head turns to the side and see Minho there, leaning against the table next to you.
"See, burning people they smell like... a burnt slice of meat on a griddle. It's better if you dissociate from it," he coyly says.
The images are so vivid that you feel the need to escape it, run away from here and so you do. You make a run to the door and he's already standing there next to it.
"If we're being honest, I don't want the apocalypse to come about any more than you do," he says.
You turn the knob and open it, running through the hall that leads to the exit door. Yet Minho is already there too.
"So let's stop it happening, you and me, mmh?" He says to you.
"All we have to do is deliver three sacrifices in seven days," he pops at the end of the hall.
You yank the door open and find him standing outside the door.
"It's only three killings," he says with a malicious laugh.
You rush to climb down the steps trying to escape what you know is like trying to get out of your head, it's inescapable.
"Animals don't count. You have to do humans," Minho informs at the base of the stairs.
You hurriedly unlock the iron gate and pull it open, running into the street in the middle of the night but of course, he's already there too.
"We can do like one kill a day but I'm good with one kill in two days and—"
You decide to go the other way from where Minho is standing and just aimlessly walking to avoid him. You know the neighborhood but not as good as when it's at night.
You walk down the stairs that lead to the riverbank, feeling more afraid of Minho instead of being mugged at night.
"That is fewer people than die falling off ladders in the same time period," Minho magically appears on the stairs, leaning against the railing.
"You'd be less lethal than a ladder," he adds with a sly smirk.
Your eyes are watery either from the cold wind or the anxiety taking over you. You sniffle before talking to him, "If I talk to you, you're real so I'm not going—"
You walk away before you can finish your sentence and walk along the riverbank, hugging yourself.
"Well, we started conversing already so that ship has sailed."
You can't believe that he's still following you when he knows exactly why you are trying to get away.
"No, it hasn't," you persist when you know he's right.
"Oh, oh yes it has," he talks back with a mocking tone.
You stop on your track and grunt in frustration, bending down to pick whatever is close to you.
Minho stops walking as well and says, "Don't worry. We're a team. I'm on your side, you know?"
He takes a step forward and keeps talking, ignoring that he's the reason why you're so frustrated.
"Let's just get kill number one under your belt, mmh?" He says in a softer tone.
You turn at him, your finger pointing right at his sharp nose and sternly tell him, "You can stop it because I am not killing anyone!"
You take a deep breath to calm yourself down and try to face him again, "You're not real so I don't why you keep talking to me," you snarl.
Minho coyly smiles at you and calmly responds, "That's what I'm here for. Moral support!"
He takes even a closer step to you and lowers his voice, "So, just hold on to that rock and hit someone with it!"
You get confused by what he said, "What rock?"
He eyes your hand on your side, "The one in your hand, love!" He answers.
You don't even realize you've been holding it until he pointed it out. The moment you know, you can feel its weight in your hand.
You gasp in surprise and glare at Minho, "I'm not doing what you say."
You hear footsteps coming from under the bridge and turn around to see a middle-aged man, "Are you alright, Miss?"
But Minho sees it as an opportunity, he stands and looms behind you, whispering evil things into your head.
"Mmmh... yeah," he hums in victory.
"He's perfect. No witnesses. Talk about beginner's luck," he whispers to you so close that it feels like he's living inside your head.
You feel his hand resting on your shoulder as he further persuades you, "Just one quick pop to the head and you're done."
For a second, you wanted to do what he said just so he could stop bothering you. However, the conscience in you is talking you out of it.
You walk toward the man and try to seek help from him, "Please, make him stop!" You say, gesturing to Minho who's standing right next to you.
The man looks confused by what you said and asks, "Make who stop?"
Disoriented by what's real or not, you keep looking back at Minho, then at the man, getting pushed to where you hit your limit.
The man walks up to you, feeling more concerned for you that he asks again, "Is everything alright?"
The relentless demon he is, Minho stands close next to you and whispers, "Would it help if I told you I can see into this man's soul and he absolutely deserves to die?"
This time you know it's his way to get what he wants, to get you to do the deed. You look away and hastily shout, "Shut up!"
Yet Minho keeps talking about the man as he's giving you a stare, one that you're way too familiar with, and convinces you that he thinks you're crazy.
"He has a wife and a daughter, you want to know what he does to them?" Minho's words hold intense hatred in them like you can feel the bitterness of it on your tongue.
You look at him to see if he's just tricking you to kill the man, "Don't trust me? Well, get a load of this!"
Minho covers your eyes with his hand again and this time, images of the man abusing his wife and daughter over and over again that you can't bear to watch anymore.
He snaps you back to reality again and says, "You'll save them both from years of pain, shame, and guilt."
Fueled by the rage from what you've seen through Minho's vision, you launch yourself at the man and hit him hard on the head, sending him tumbling to the side and into the river.
You stand there watching his body sinking into the water until the air stops bubbling to the surface of water and that's when you're certain that he's dead.
The man is dead.
Despite the shock, you manage to walk away while still carrying the rock in your hand, and once you realize you've been holding to it long enough. You throw it into the river then break into a run back to the studio.
You vomit everything into the toilet bowl once you're back in the studio, retching nothing but saliva and air.
Minho is standing at the doorway of the bathroom as he says, "It takes some used to but a couple more of that and I'll be out of your hair," he says.
You flush the toilet and sit on the bathroom floor, looking at him with teary eyes and the shock that hasn't left your body yet.
He pulls out the pocket watch and shows you that the Roman number written inside has gone one line, "See? One line has gone which means one sacrifice registered. Two to go."
You get up from the floor and drag yourself to the couch, feeling so drained by whatever has driven you to do unimaginable things, one that you thought you'd never done in your life.
-
Morning has passed but you can't find the energy to live for the day.
You're lying down on the couch watching the sky turn brighter with every hour passed. It hasn't sunk in yet what you did last night. It feels like a dream but at the same time, you can still feel the weight of the rock in your hand.
Minho has been quiet but you know he's lurking in the room and he decides to interfere by standing in front of you.
He tips his head to the side and asks, "How long are you going to stay like this?"
He then sits on the other end of the couch and says, "Well, you have to, at least, do whatever it is you do as a sculptor. You can't have people getting suspicious."
How come he takes it lightly? How did he get so calm after telling you to kill a man and watch you doing it?
"Fucking shut up!" You shout at him.
Talking to him makes everything unbearably real and it makes you recollect what happened last night. The guilt, the disgust you feel for yourself, the blood on your hands, you can see everything now under the daylight.
"I killed a man," you croak, saying it hurts that tears start to crawl out of you.
"I've killed someone," you meekly say with a tear rolling down from the corner of your eyes.
"Yeah, but that was hours ago," Minho nonchalantly says.
"I keep feeling the crack of his skull on the rock," you pause to sniffle and turn to look at Minho, "I did that."
But he wouldn't get what you feel because he's not a human in the first place. Minho is a demon.
"It's your fault. You're not even—" You stop talking because it's no use to talk to an entity that knows no compassion.
You brush your hair to the back and deeply sigh. Turning your head at Minho again to ask, "Why is this happening to me?"
You use the heel of your hand to press on your eye to stop crying, "I'm not a bad person."
"No, no, no," Minho quickly denies.
He moves to stand behind the couch and leans close to you, "It wouldn't work if you were. It has to be someone corruptible," he explains.
Your forehead wrinkles and forms a questioning look on your face, trying to make sense of what he said.
"If you think about it, what's happening here, it reflects really well on your character," he says with a smile.
What he said only assures you that you are a bad person. What you did is the reflection of what you truly are, a bad person.
You nod and wipe your wet cheek with the back of your hand. You get up to sit on the couch and grab your purse, rummaging inside to pull out your phone.
"What are you doing?" Minho asks with a panicked voice.
You dial the police line on your phone and show it to him, "Calling the police."
He jolts on his feet and sits next to you on the couch as you hit the call button.
"But why?" He asks.
You can hear the dialing tone ringing so close to your ear, "So they'll arrest me," you simply answer.
Minho nervously chuckles, "Then you won't be able to do the other sacrifices," he reminds you to rethink your choices.
"Good!" You shortly respond, trying to stay in your right mind this time.
"Then the Apocalypse will happen and billions will die. I know, I know, I get it. You don't want blood on your hand but if it saves billions..." He's babbling, desperately trying to stop you from turning yourself in.
The way he puts it that way, he makes you choose the lesser between the two evils. 
"Hello, police department, may I help you?" The operator speaks on the phone.
Kill three people who deserve it or save billions of innocent people?
You find yourself hanging up the call and putting your phone away, once again failing to do the right thing.
"See? You're a good person!" Minho says as he exhales in relief.
To be honest, you don't know what's good or bad, right or wrong anymore. It's one big blur to you.
You feel frustrated once again, you feel like a failure but on the bigger picture, you're trying to stop the world from ending.
But can you really save everyone?
-
You can't wait to dwell on everything in the comfort of your apartment. Before you can do all that, you need to set boundaries with him. You face him and look him right in the eyes, "I have six days to kill two more so please, give me a break for now."
Minho gets quiet for a moment before nodding in agreement, "That's fair."
Feeling the need to wash yourself from whatever it is clinging to your body, you get a shower and take your meds to help you decompress while sitting on the end of your bed in your bathrobe.
"I don't know why you take those pills," Minho says as he enters your room.
You quietly sigh at him and say, "Can you at least give me a few minutes until it's working?"
"Want to wash it down with wine?" He offers, showing the bottle of red in his hand.
You shake your head, "I can't drink alcohol after taking antidepressants," you answer, not sure why bother answering him.
"That sucks!" He says and puts the wine bottle down on top of your dresser, "I was thinking we could celebrate our first kill."
You feel a little faint at the mention of the word kill and celebrate being put in one sentence. You climb onto the bed and pull your duvet, "I need to rest."
Minho appears at the end of your bed, looking down at you with his dark, wide eyes, "That's right. We have a lot to do tomorrow."
"Can you turn the lights out for me?"
"Certainly."
The room turns dark but you get a newfound comfort in it.
"Goodnight," Minho's voice caresses your ears like a spring breeze.
You don't want to get used to this but you feel inexplicably at ease that there's someone else with you in this vast emptiness.
"Goodnight, Minho."
-
SIX DAYS TO THE END OF THE WORLD
You jolt awake to the sounds of your phone ringing on your bedside table and you know who it is without having to look at the contact name. Your fingers are tapping the phone screen as you squint your eyes to make sure you hit the accept call button.
"Yeah?" You ask as you put the phone on the side of your face while you're lying on your side with your eyes closed.
"You're still sleeping?" Kim asks, noticing the sleep in your voice.
"Mm-mmh," you hum in answer.
"You know what time it is?"
"I don't know. Nine or ten?" You wildly guess by how badly you want to go back to sleep.
You hear her sighing from the other line of the call, "It's almost 2 in the afternoon," she says.
You force your eyes to open to check the time yourself and see that it is indeed two in the afternoon.
"Oh?" You innocently gasp.
Realizing that may piss her off, you hurried to shift the conversation elsewhere, "Yeah, uh... why are you calling again?"
You fear that she's going to be mad about you abruptly leaving the exhibition or worse if she knew about Nick. You hold your breath, anticipating her answer.
"Oh, yes, I have good news," she says with a smile that you can feel from your end of the line.
"You sold four sculptures, darling!" She squeals.
That's exciting news but you don't have it in you to participate in that excitement, yet you feel relieved you can properly breathe at ease.
"That's... That's great!" You meekly say while raking your hair to the back with your fingers.
"I've been calling you since yesterday, you know that?"
"Oh? I, uhm..." You take a moment to think of an answer.
Summoned a demon? Found out that you have seven days to the end of the world? Killed someone to stop it?
"I needed—"
"Never mind!" She rudely cuts you off, "Guessing from how tired you sounded, you must be going straight back to work, huh?"
The sculpture is still a chunk of unshapen stone but yeah, you worked on it just a bit. Well, a work is a work.
"Yeah, I-I did," you sputter your answer yet thankful that all of her guesses are off the mark.
"I'll come with the paperwork tomorrow. For now, you can rest now or work some more, knock yourself out," she says, couldn't care less about what you're doing now that you've made money and she got to feed on a few percent of it.
"Thanks, Kim!" You say, because it's better to always be on her good side.
"Oh, come on! We both working hard," she kindly refuses but you know she feels entitled to this.
"Let's have a dinner to celebrate," she suggests.
"Yeah, yeah," you half-heartedly answer.
"Talk to you later, okay?"
"Okay."
"Bye!"
You don't even bother to say it back knowing that she'll hang up right after she said her bye. Since you've woken up already, you sit up on the bed and pull your knees up, hugging your feet as you gather your thoughts.
In your peripheral vision, you see a flash of red from the doorway of your room. You turn to look and see Minho standing with the side of his body leaning against the doorframe.
The all-black outfit he's wearing makes his honey skin glow and his hair look like a blazing fire under the sunlight. He smiles once he notices your eyes are on him.
"Morning, sunshine!" He sweetly greets you with a smile that is a little unsettling but a whole lot attractive.
He crosses his arms in front of him, exposing the veins coiling his forearms, "Oh, wait, it's way past noon," he says with a grin.
Looking at him only reminds you of the responsibility you're carrying on your shoulders: saving billions of people from being incinerated.
"Are you always like this or...?" Minho asks, breaking the silence that hung in the room as you think of the dire situation you're in.
Minho approaches you and stands at the end of the bed, "You can't stay in all day. We only have five and a half days left," he reminds you of the time-sensitive quest you're in.
The only way to save those billions is by killing three people. That's the only thing on the pro list, there are just too many cons, mainly on the killing part. The only good thing that comes out of it so far is that you only need to do two more killings.
God! What have you become?
"What should I do?" You hopelessly ask him even though it's a bad idea to ask a demon such a question.
"Just carry on as usual so the people around you don't get spooked," he answers.
It's you and him, him and you, there's no one else you can seek help from.
Minho is right. You can't just sit here and watch the day goes by or else the thing you've done would come to a waste.
You slowly scoot over to sit on the edge of the bed and rub the sleep of your eyes, not ready to face the day when you know you only have six days left to stop the end of the world.
"And while we're going on about the day we can decide who to kill next," Minho adds.
The devilish grin looks beautiful on his sculpted face but everything he says sending a chill down your spine.
-
"Oh, an old lady!" Minho exclaims as an elderly lady enters the elevator.
You silently watch as he scoots closer to her and smells her head, "She smells like... oh! She's sweet."
You silently groan in the corner watching what he's doing.
He places his hand on the lady's shoulder and says, "She can't stop thinking about the end though. She can't wait for it to come."
He looks at you with that wild grin plastered on his face, "You'd be doing her a favor."
You lightly shake your head at him to make him stop playing around the poor lady but he doesn't get the clues.
"She dreams of death. Even now—"
"Shut up!" You say through your gritted teeth.
The old lady turns to look at you, "What is it, my dear?"
You quickly put on a smile for her, "Oh, nothing," you politely say.
Minho walks up to stand next to you again and whispers in your ear, "Just do it. No one will miss her."
"Shut up!" You whisper back while throwing daggers with your eyes at him.
"She's nearly dead already!"
Thankfully, the elevator dings open and shoots his idea down as you step out of the elevator.
"We need to start to pick someone!" He persists as he follows you walking in the lobby.
Minho is such a nuisance.
It's hard to ignore him when he keeps talking, making remarks about everyone he sees, and constantly around you the whole time.
It's when you're working on your sculpture that you get to immerse yourself in your work and disassociate from reality.
All you hear is the slamming sound of your hammer on the chisel and pieces of stone falling onto the floor. Looking down at the mess you made, you spot one particular piece of stone lying close to your feet. You stare at it for too long you get the recollection of that night.
The weight of the rock in your hand, how you bashed someone's head with it, and the splashing sound of the man falling into the water, all of that vividly playing in the back of your head.
You stagger backward and drop your chisel onto the floor, the clattering sound echoing in the spacious studio.
"I've been meaning to tell you this," Minho appears from behind the sculpture, startling you.
"We should order food," he suggests.
You put away your hammer and take off your mask, walking to the mini fridge to get a bottle of water.
"You're a demon. You feed on..." You think for a moment to finish your sentence as you unscrew the cap of the bottle.
He snatches the flyer stuck to the fridge door and asks, "Pizza?"
You close the fridge and walk over to the couch, plopping yourself down before chugging some water into your system.
"You need to eat so you can—"
"Kill?" You finish his sentence.
Minho scrunches his nose and sits on the armrest of the couch next to you, "I was about to say think but yeah, that too," he says.
You untie your pinafore and throw it aside, he isn't wrong to say that you need to eat. What's the point of saving the world if you're going to die of starvation?
You let out a sigh and grab the flyer from his hand, typing the numbers on your phone screen.
"Cheese pizza, please? With a lot of pepperoni!"
How can you believe that he's a demon when his choice of pizza topping is like a toddler's?
-
"Good evening, Miss!" The concierge greets you as he sees you enter the door.
"Hi," you greet back, impatiently wanting to get back to your apartment to dwell on your fate again.
"Miss Kim came by and dropped something for you," he informs, taking out a big envelope from your mailing box.
There's a faint sound coming from the small TV tuned to a news broadcast when you come to the desk to collect it.
"Here it is, Miss," he slides the big brown envelope across the shiny surface of the desk. There's a note on top of it which you immediately recognize as Kim's.
You open to do a quick check on what's inside when you hear a glimpse of the news from the TV.
"...man found dead in the river has been identified as Ben Watson, a financial officer of a bank company, leaving a wife and a seven-year-old daughter who has been notified about his tragic death..."
You glance at the small screen and see the photograph of the man you killed that night. You can't possibly be wrong about this when you remember the horror on his face as you lifted the rock before swinging it hard to his head.
"Is there anything wrong, Miss?" The concierge asks.
You snap yourself out of your daze and put the envelope close to your chest as if someone about to steal it from you.
"No, no," your voice is quivering in panic at the sight of the man you killed.
"Thank you," you abruptly the conversation with gratitude and walking fast to the elevator.
The warm water doesn't work to calm you down when you're tainted inside. You feel filthy, inside and out. You feel sick seeing your reflection in the mirror.
You've been holding your medicine in your hand but you need something stronger, you ditch the pill and run to the kitchen.
You pull out the wine you have in the kitchen cabinet and drink it straight from the bottle, chugging it like it's water. You gasp when you stop drinking, taking the bottle with you as you sit on the sofa while you're still in your bathrobe.
"This is how you're going to end the day?" Minho asks, taking the bottle of wine from you to take a sip.
"Can you stop talking about killing for just—" You choke on air as anger bubbles up inside you.
Minho holds his hands up in defeat and leans back on the sofa next to you, "I'm just saying..." he meekly says.
The silence only resides for a minute until he speaks again, "Look, the earlier you get it done—" he stops talking when you shoot him a glare.
You take the bottle of wine from him and take a long gulp, a drop of wine escapes the corner of your mouth, dripping down your chin.
You aggressively wipe it with the sleeve of your bathrobe and recline on the sofa, looking out at the city lights that look like pinpricks in the dark of the night.
"I'm crazy..." you sadly remark.
Those words remind you of a sobering fact that what people think of you: crazy.
Ever since you were still an art student, people often found you talking to yourself in class, always in your little world with your imaginary friend. That leads you to this solitary life because normal people avoid crazy.
"People are right about me. I'm crazy," you state again, and saying it out loud makes your heart aches.
Minho turns his head and looks at you with his dark eyes that weirdly provide you warmth, "You're not crazy."
But why would a normal person kill a person because a demon told him to? You don't even know if he's real and not a product of your imagination.
"I'm a murderer..." you say with a heavy sigh and an even heavier heart.
He scoots closer until he sits close next to you, his shoulder bumps with yours on the big sofa that could fit five people. He looks at you and gently says, "Yeah, but not a crazy one."
Minho has a way of looking at bad things positively. You chuckle at the irony of his words. You can't tell if you should be happy that you're not crazy or sad that you're indeed a murderer.
He slumps down on the sofa to be on the same level as you, also turning his head to look at the view, "Want to know something?"
Instead of answering, you take a sip of the wine. You know he'll keep talking even if you refuse him.
"This is actually my first assignment," he shares.
He drops his hand on the space on the sofa, merely inches away from yours, "It's more of an initiation, sort of earning my wings."
You look at him and get a little taken aback by the proximity you can see yourself in his eyes. You almost forget what you were trying to say to him, "What are you trying to say?"
You look away because he looks exactly like the one you envisioned on your sculpture, divinely beautiful that it's hard to comprehend.
"I'm saying that I'm new to this too," he answers.
Again, you can't tell if you should be happy or sad to know that. Strangely though, you find comfort in his words.
You look at his hand splayed so close to yours and it evokes the curiosity in you that needs to be fed. You gently flip over his hand and gently slip your fingers on the spaces between his fingers, you can feel the warmth and the roughness of his finger pads on each finger.
Minho is real, he's real, you perpetually assure yourself.
You glance at him and he's looking at you, your eyes meet in a tender gaze.
"Are you real, Minho?"
You're aware of how much that question weighs. If the answer is no, you know the insurmountable pain you brought onto yourself.
He slowly blinks and you can see his dark lashes fanning out so beautifully. His crimson-red lips open and says, "I'm as real as you want me to be."
Words aren't enough to convince you. With the despair filling your heart, you lean in and innocently put your lips on his. It's a kiss that feels more than just a physical act, one that you didn't know you needed.
After getting the reassurance that you need, you pull away. However, the hand lingering on your jaw tells otherwise. He touches your face with just his fingertips yet it's enough to send a tingle inside.
Slowly, he leans in to kiss your closed eyelids ever so softly and before you know it, he brings your face closer to place a tender kiss on your lips. 
And for the first time in your life, you feel the warmth no one has ever given you.
-
FIVE DAYS TO THE END OF THE WORLD
"You wake up early!" Minho says as you dress up to get ready for the day.
You ignore his words, continue collecting your things around the room, and put them into your bag.
"Are you trying to match your clothes with me?" He says, looking at your all-black outfit while sitting on the headrest of the sofa.
This morning, you woke up on the sofa still in your bathrobe and a blanket covered your body. The first thing you remember is you kissed him last night and somehow, it convinces you to keep going with the quest.
However, you still feel conflicted with what you do. You need to make sure of one thing.
"How about this handsome fucker?" Minho asks, pointing to the other person riding the elevator with you.
The man looks indeed handsome, he dressed so impeccably when it's only ten in the morning. He catches you looking and smiles at you.
You politely smile back and look away only to face Minho who's standing on the other corner of the elevator.
"He'll be losing his hair at the age of 32 and spends the next 29 years taking it out on his wife," he whispers even though no one can hear him but you.
The taxi ride to the hospital only takes fifteen minutes and you know where to go right away from the array of flower arrangements outside the separate building from the main hospital.
"Please tell me you're not doing what I'm thinking?" Minho asks in a concerned voice.
You wish to be able to shut him up for a few minutes until you can find what you're looking for. The hall is packed with people in black attire to what you can safely assume are the guests of the mourning family on the two funeral services being held by two different families.
You read the sign that leads to the Watson family yet pretend to be the one visiting the other family. Before you can sneak into their funeral service, you see someone taking the daughter outside.
"This is a bad idea!" Minho panickly says.
It's kind of alarming to hear because it's the first time he sounded genuinely concerned. You follow where the little girl is being taken and turns out, she's being taken to the park outside, probably to avoid her feeling overwhelmed.
"You're not a relative. People will get suspicious of you!" Minho nervously whispers.
You come over to the two men chatting and kindly ask for a cigarette even though you don't smoke. You stand at the other side of the door and take a drag of the smoke to be seen convincing.
"I know you're worried..." Minho sighs.
He stands next to you with his head hovering close to your ear. He takes a breath before talking, "She's not in mourning. She's not not mourning," he says as you both quietly watch the girl sitting on the bench and drinking a juice box.
"Happy that it's finished but sad that he's dead. But it has finished!" He emphasizes the last word.
You take another drag and accidentally do it excessively, sending you into a coughing fit.
"You spared her another five years of it. A lifetime of therapy," Minho explains, "a lifetime!"
You look at him to see if he meant what he said. He's a demon after all, the vision he forced you to see could be misleading, a trick to make you do what he says.
He looks back at you and smiles, "She's a mom at 29. A nan at 57," he shares.
See? He knows how to comfort you even though you don't ask for it. You give up on pretending to smoke and stab the cigarette butts onto the big ashtray. You shove your hands into the pocket of your jacket and start walking away to the parking lot.
"Why are you telling me this?" You curiously ask.
He nonchalantly shrugs as he walks next to you, "I just thought you'd like to know."
-
"Did you see that?" Minho shouts as he leisurely watches TV with his feet up on the couch.
You pretend not to hear him and continue sculpting, hitting the hammer harder, louder to drown out his voice. As if he read your mind, he appears behind you and places both of his hands on your shoulders.
"You should see this!" He insists, steering your body and making you watch the TV.
It's a broadcast of night news about climate change and he magically changes the channel to show news about nuclear testing.
"It's manifesting. Do you understand?"
Minho keeps switching the channel to show you every bad there is happening in the world, everything that shows the sign that the world is close to ending.
You lightly shrug him off and say, "We got this kind of news a few years ago but—"
Minho holds you by the shoulders and shakes you awake, "This is real. We don't have much time and you're the only one who can stop it!" He reminds you of the harsh truth.
Somehow that only makes you question why you have to be the one to bear such responsibility. Billions of people on earth and they chose you?
"I'm not ready yet. I'm—"
"Don't you want to see that little girl live her peaceful future?" Minho asks.
This is where you know he's being the demon he is, using your weakness to his advantage and making you give in to the temptation.
It's not so much a temptation when you have no other options, it's killing or being engulfed in flames on Friday. You muster up your courage and think of something to do.
The first killing was what Minho said it was: a beginner's luck, the man happened to be there and an abusive bastard, even in his grave, he shall not rest in peace.
This time, you plan to do it meticulously and without mistakes. You walk to the kitchen and pull open the drawer, taking out a knife you occasionally use to cut your sandwiches.
Minho shakes his head in disapproval of your choice of weapon, "You're not a knife person," he concludes.
You look at him, demanding an explanation behind that haste conclusion.
"It's messy. You could hurt yourself," he explains.
That sounds right. You put the knife back into the drawer and look around the studio to find potential killing weapons.
Minho leans into your side and whispers, "Let's choose something that is more you!"
You look at him and see that he's eyeing the table full of your sculpting tools.
You pick up the medium chisel and show it to him to seek his approval. You meet another disapproval as he strongly shakes his head.
"It's too specific. They'll know it's you. You're the only sculptor living in the area," he gives you an insight into how the devil's mind works.
You must admit that he just saved you from making a mistake. You pick another weapon that you're familiar with but also gives you the upper hand to do the killing. You pick up the hammer and turn around to show him.
A smile rises on his face as he nods in approval, "That's you! You're a basher!"
You bring the hammer close and observe it, it feels good around your hand since it's a tool that you work with most of your life.
"You've had the practice now. It'll be easier this time," Minho says with a sinister smile.
You want to believe his words so much but the nerves get to you. Your breathing becomes erratic once you realize what you're going to do with the hammer.
Minho puts his hand on the small of your back and holds you steady, "Liquor courage! That's what you need! Booze!" He suggests.
"I don't keep any alcohol in the studio," you meekly say.
Considering that sculpting involves a lot of sharp objects, it's wise to not keep anything that would dull your focus.
"Also, I just took an antidepressant an hour ago," you inform him.
"Oh, shit!" He curses and leans his body to the back, against the table.
Minho crosses his arms in front of him, then rubs his chin as he thinks of something. He then leers at you with a smirk dancing on his face, "Well, do you want a drink?"
-
There's a bar a few blocks away from your studio.
You got here in need of liquid courage and there's plenty of them here. You plan to only consume enough alcohol just to calm the nerves but not too much to lose your focus.
It gets you anxious to step into a new environment. You decide to go straight to order drinks.
"Whiskey, please?" You say to the bartender with a handlebar mustache.
Bartenders tend to remember the faces they have seen and yours must not have registered into his memory bank. He puts away the cloth he's holding.
"You want ice with it?" He asks.
"I'll have it dry," you answer since you came here for the alcohol, not for refreshment.
"Easy, love. We have work to do," Minho reminds as he props a hand against the countertop.
Knowing that one drink wouldn't be enough and you don't want to bother the bartender again for a drink, you decide to double.
"Make that two, please!" You hurriedly say before the bartender starts making your order.
"You don't have to get one for me," Minho grins at you.
The bartender takes another glass with him to finally fill them with your choice of potion.
"I didn't," you whisper back at him.
You immediately pay for it and bring your drinks with you to the empty spot in the corner of the bar, hidden behind the pool table.
You slowly sip your drink and feel it running through your system, stripping a layer of senses off of you, making you less aware of your surroundings.
"Okay, you see anyone tasty?" Minho asks as he sits next to you.
He cranes his neck looking for the next human sacrifice among the people who are enjoying their concoctions. His finger points to the guy with a beanie and drinking a pint of beer.
"Oh, that one perfect!" He exclaims.
He stacks his hands on top of the table and leans forward as he further speaks, "Burglaries. Mostly target the elderly. What do you reckon?" He turns to you for opinions.
The alcohol is not quite there yet so you take a longer sip. You feel the alcohol burns your throat and you wince from the bitter aftertaste.
"No?" He asks as he looks at you.
You know he's asking about the human sacrifice, not the alcohol but the answer is the same, "No."
Minho moves on. His eyes are pacing around the room to study people and check their backgrounds with his evil power.
He taps your shoulder as he finds his next candidate, "See that girl with the pints?"
You can easily spot the girl with curly hair, carrying two pints of beer in her hands.
Minho leans in close to your ear to give his intel, "She went on holiday when she was 12 years old and saw her sister drown in a swimming pool."
He suddenly lowers his voice as he tells you the rest of the story, "She could have pulled her out but she just stood there and watched."
Maybe it's true that people are the scariest.
They may look ordinary and good and all yet inside, lies this darkness that they buried deep inside them. If Minho hadn't told you, you would have taken her as a pretty girl with a nice smile and nothing more.
Minho pulls at the sleeve of your shirt and points to another guy, talking to his friend by the pool table. You're about to wave him off again until the guy turns his head and you know who it is.
"How about him? He likes to secretly film girls by drug them and once he—"
"Sent a girl into overdose," you finish his sentence.
Everyone knows who Tim Shaw other than a student in our faculty and more importantly, people know what he likes to do to innocent girls yet no one dares to make him take responsibility for what he did.
Until one night, he drugged a girl and left her on the cold floor of a club, unconscious. There's no evidence that he drugged her or it was he drugged, ended up with him getting dropped off of all charges.
You have one more drink to finish and you gulp it in one go, wanting to use this opportunity to get back for what he did to that poor, innocent girl.
Minho triumphantly smiles, knowing that you have set a target on Tim's head.
"I think we have a contender," he concludes.
-
Tim is exiting the bar and you take it as an advantage.
You don't need to lure him out, you wait a minute before you follow him outside to not seem conspicuous. Once you're outside, you look side to side to see where Tim is going.
"Perfect location. No witnesses," Minho answers as you both find him turning to the back of the bar.
Tim seems to hear your rushed footsteps and turns around to see you. He seems to be taken aback and you doubt that he'll recognize you. Being crazy has its advantages, you're off the asshole's radar.
You nervously laugh as he looks at you. You quickly think of something to say, "Oh, my God! It's really you, Tim!" You say with fake enthusiasm.
"I'm sorry but who..." he gets all defensive.
"I'm—" You don't know how to explain yourself other than 'the insane one from art school'.
"Oh, wait, you're that girl, the sculptor, the... uh," he brakes before he can say the infamous title of yours.
"The freaky one?" You playfully say.
He bursts into laughter and nods, "Hey, don't get me wrong. I like freaky," he says.
Minho points to the carts of empty bottles and gestures for you to use them instead of the hammer inside your bag that weighs your shoulder the longer you're carrying it.
"I was just getting a drink but it doesn't feel good drinking alone," you lie even though that's how you prefer to enjoy your poison.
"Yeah, I bet," he says with a grin that showcases his whitened teeth and malicious intent.
"How about drinking at my place?" He offers.
"Home turf. Even better," Minho comments, appearing behind you.
You don't want to seem desperate to be with Tim because honestly, you're just stalling to find the perfect opportunity to kill him. It's time to put what you learned from Kim into practice.
"I, uhm..." you rub the back of your neck and shyly smile at him, "I don't think that's..."
As you pretend to consider his offer, he's secretly checking you out. His eyes travel up and down your body, you bet he thinks of lewd things even though you're dressed like a bible salesman with the same outfit you wore to the funeral service.
He takes a step forward and smiles at you, "I live not far from here. You can easily crawl back here if you think I'm a bad drinking partner," he seduces.
Tim must have thought you were as gullible as the other. Oh, he has no idea the surprise you have for him!
"If you don't mind, yeah," you say with a low giggle.
"Okay," he says with a triumphant smile.
His house is indeed only two blocks away from the bar and he keeps boasting about how he owns a house from his inheritance and the rising price of property these days.
"Please, come in!" He lets you into his house.
You step on a crumpled beer can as you enter the living room and are horrified at the amount of trash littering the place.
"A few friends and I watched a football match last night," he concisely explains.
He takes off his jacket and hangs it on the coat rack, "How about we drink in my room?"
You uneasily glance at Minho and he nods. You look back at Tim then put on a fake smile for him, "Yes."
He leads the way up the stairs and you follow him, climbing the steps with the hammer getting heavier and heavier inside your bag.
Tim turns around and sees you being hesitant, "There's no need to be shy now," he says with a lopsided grin.
You respond with a smile, keeping your head tilted up, and continue climbing up the stairs.
"Now!" Minho orders.
"Hit him with the hammer now!" He says again so close to your ear.
Your head snaps in his direction and hisses through your gritted teeth, "Shut the fuck up!"
Tim catches you talking and looks over his shoulder, "What's that?"
"Can't wait to see the bedroom!" You lie and add a giggle to sound convincing.
He smirks at you before pushing the door to his bedroom, "Come on in!"
His room is less messy than his living room in which he helplessly tries to make it seem tidy by flattening the pile of his duvet.
"You can sit down here," he says, patting the space next to him on the bed.
"You're not really going to have sex with him, are you?" Minho asks as he quietly watches you from across the bed.
A deadly glare is enough to answer him and he immediately refrains from pressuring you.
"I was just checking," he adds.
It's when you're in his bedroom that you start to fear Tim, not when you know what he is capable of. But at the same time, it fuels your hate fire, it reminds you of the reason why you need to eliminate scum like him.
"You keep your alcohol in your room?" You ask.
It's obvious that he took you here for different intention. He's taking you here for the sole reason that is to ruin your life.
"Oh, yeah, the drinks," he smacks his lips together and awkwardly paces in the room.
He reaches for the portable speaker on top of his dresser and turns it on, "You can wait for the drinks while listening to music," he says.
You nod, "That sounds nice!"
He gets out of his bedroom and heads back downstairs. While he's doing what you believe is spiking your drink with substance, you think of a plan on how you're going to kill him.
First, you take the hammer out of your bag and practice your swing. You get panicked with each second passed and haven't found a way to catch him off guard.
The footsteps on the stairs signal you that he's on his way here. You decide to do the classic way by hiding in the back of the door, planning to strike him from behind.
You see his figure entering the room, carrying two glasses of drinks in his hands, "It's your lucky day because I found a bottle of—"
Without thinking, you swing your hammer hard and hit him right on the side of the head. It's a weak blow and you can see that from how he's staggering backward, still conscious.
There's no turning back now that you have done it. You come charging at him, attacking him while he's still disoriented from the first blow.
He collapses onto the bed and not giving him time to recover, you keep hitting his head with the hammer with blood splattering the bed and wall with every swing of the hammer going onto his head.
You whimper as blood gets on your face and see that Tim is lying cold on the bed, dead. However, you land another blow just to make sure you've done it and leave no room for mistakes.
"You're good, you're good," Minho says from across the room.
That's when you stop and take a step back. It feels like your soul has left your body, you suddenly feel drained and the hammer drops onto the floor.
You look at the mess you made, the bloody mess and dead body, your life that is once far from all of it. Your throat suddenly closes up and you find it hard to breathe.
After a moment, Minho gets to your side to say, "You can't have that lying around," he's eyeing the bloody hammer lying on the floor.
With your mouth gaping for air, you bend down to pick it up and shove it back into your bag.
"Cleans anything you touched," Minho instructed.
You take a handkerchief from inside your jacket and use it to wipe surfaces you probably made contact with even though you're sure there aren't any.
You leave the bedroom after wiping the handle of the door and make a turn to the stairs when you hear the front door creak open.
You peek from the top of the stairs and someone is turning the lights in the kitchen.
"Get out before he sees you," Minho whispers.
It's bad when he needs to whisper like that even though no one can hear or see him, but you. The adrenaline is still pumping and you make the most of it by bracing yourself to make a run down the stairs and to the front door that is only a few meters away.
You take a deep breath before quietly descending the stairs without making any noise. You can feel your heart beating in your ear yet you keep going as the door is only a reach away.
You successfully land on the base of the stairs when your bag accidentally hits a flower pot, sending it breaking into pieces on the floor.
"Tim?" The man calls.
He looks at you with confusion drawn on his face, "Who are you?"
It's too late for you to break into a run as he sees your face and officially makes him an eyewitness. You can't leave an eyewitness, at least, not until you've done all three human sacrifices.
Is it necessary to kill him though?
You can think and consider as much as you want but it all comes down to the one question: kill or end the world?
-
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strangersteddierthings · 10 months
Text
What's Eight Plus Seven?
Part One🦇Part Two🦇Part Three🦇Part Four🦇Part Five
Alright y'all. We had the hurt, let's get some comfort started.
-
Steve leans against his door, expecting Eddie to follow him upstairs to continue their argument because Eddie's never been one to back down from an argument as far as Steve can tell, so he's using his weight to keep the door shut. It takes about five minutes of just leaning against the door before he hears a few light knocks on the door. He pretends he didn't hear them and soon starts to hear Eddie monologue-ing on the other side. He thinks he hears a 'sorry' and an 'I fucked up' but he doesn't really tune in until Eddie says something about cancelling Hellfire.
Spinning quickly, he yanks the door open and says, "You better not fucking cancel!"
"What? Don't you, like, want me out of your house?" Eddie looks startled and sounds confused.
"What I want is for the kids to get to play Dungeons and Dorks for an afternoon, just getting to be kids and fight against monsters that can't actually kill them," Steve says as he goes to put his hands on his hips (a move that Robin calls his Bitch Stance) but realizes he can't while still holding a book, so instead he folds his arms across his chest, cradling the book to his body.
He waits for Eddie to call him out for saying dorks instead of dragons, but Eddie just blinks at him, quiet for a moment before he says, "Oh. Uh, okay then. I'll just, uhh, I'll be back closer to noon, then. For the game."
"Don't you have prep to do?" Steve knows he's trying to pick a fight now but he's angry, and sad, and hurt underneath it all. Also, he doesn't understand the change in Eddie suddenly. Ten-ish minutes ago Eddie had shouted back I wasn’t exactly wrong, was I? You were a jock, a bully even! Where is that anger now?
"No. Not, uh, not really," Eddie says, avoiding meeting Steve's gaze, face turning a very light pink. "I was- I mean, yes, there was prep, but I did a majority of that already and what's left will take maybe three minutes so..."
Steve's confused now, still trying to cling to his anger. "But you called and asked if it was okay to come early specifically for that reason."
Eddie doesn't respond right away. He turns around to walk to the wall opposite Steve's door and thump his forehead against it. Steve is perplexed by the behavior (but he's been perplexed by Eddie since finding him at Reefer Rick's) so he just watches in silence as Eddie heaves a sigh and turns around to slump against the wall, facing Steve once again. He runs a hand through his hair, then drags that hand back forward and down his face. "Yeah. I did do that."
"So, what, you lied? Why?"
"I just wanted to hang out," Eddie whispers, like it almost hurts him to say out loud, which is such a weird thing to hear because it makes Eddie seem small in a way Steve's never seen him. Even during spring break Eddie was never small or quiet; his fear manifested as shouting, for fuck's sake. It chips away at the last of Steve's anger. He's long past the days of kicking someone when they're down.
"You... wanted to hang out," Steve repeats before heaving a sigh of his own, long-suffering man that he is. Maybe it is time to bury the hatchet and actual deal with this. If nothing else, it'll result in Steve being less defensive around Eddie when everyone hangs out, like for movie night or BBQs. Also, he knows that Dustin will never let him know another day of peace once he learns that Eddie and Steve don't get along as well as he wants them to so he says, "Listen, I think we've got some shit to hash out, or whatever, so that should probably be done or, like, things are going to be weird when we all hang out, but I can't do that right now, man. So, stay or go, just make that game happen at noon. I'm going to stay up here."
Eddie nods, weirdly sullen and quiet again, as he says, "Yeah. Umm, maybe after the game? If you're feeling up to it."
"Sure. After."
Eddie raps his knuckles against the wall behind him twice before pushing off and heading back towards the stairs. He pauses to look over his shoulder and say, "If you wanna watch, or listen in, or something, I don't think anyone will mind." And then he's heading down the stairs.
Retreating back to his room, Steve tosses the book onto his bed before flopping face first next to it. He groans into his comforter before reaching for the book. He props himself up on his elbows and stares down at the cover before opening it to see Christopher's handwriting on the inside cover.
It's been years since he thought about Christopher and even longer since he's laid eyes on the books. He was so sure his mom had just gotten rid of them. All this time, they'd been right where he left them, shoved just far enough back to be out of sight on the shelf. His last link to Christopher.
That's not true, Steve scolds himself. His cousins, Amber and Robert, are still alive and in Washington. His grandparents still live on that farm in Michigan. Steve just hasn't seen them since the funeral.
He hadn't gone back to the farm the summer after freshman year, or any year since. His parents thought he was old enough to stay home for a whole month in the summer alone now, instead of paying to ship him off to his grandparents. Steve's old enough now to know that was why he'd spent a month every year out on the farm; so his parents could go off on longer work trips. Once they'd decided Steve was old enough to stay alone for the summer, that quickly reached other seasons and by the time Steve was a junior, the were gone more than they were home.
He doesn't even remember when he last spoke to them in person. He thinks the last phone call was right after Starcourt. It was just to make sure Steve got to job hunting, since his place of employment had burned down and the bills wouldn't pay themselves. Which is true. He doesn't have to pay rent, but all the utilities are in his name now.
Jesus, he doesn't want to be thinking about them.
He goes back to the book, flipping through the pages absently. Halfway through the book he finds a couple folded pieces of paper tucked close to the spine. He doesn't have to open them to know exactly what they are.
It's the character sheets he'd made.
He closes the book back atop them and rolls over to face his ceiling. He wants to call Robin, but the phones are downstairs and he doesn't want to go down there just yet. He also kinda wants to cry. To get rid of all these emotions about Christopher, and Freshman First Day, and Eddie.
Fucking Eddie. Who haunts Steve's thoughts more than he'd like because despite the grudge Steve has been holding, Eddie has been fun to be around and so good with the kids, especially Dustin. Fuck, after having watched Dustin break down when they thought he was dead- but he'd had a pulse. It was weak but it was there.
After Eddie'd been cleared of the charges and the months rolled on into summer, they'd spent lots of time together as a group. Steve will admit he tried to avoid Eddie as best he could (he knows he's petty, okay) but could still see how he blended smoothly into their group.
If this Eddie had been the one he met on Freshman First Day, instead of the dick that mocked him, they might very well be friends now.
That's the crux of it all, Steve thinks. That he wouldn't mind being friends with Eddie if not for that bottled up grudge he'd been holding onto. He can't bring himself to let it go and Steve's not even sure why. Thoughts and feelings aren't something Steve processes quickly, and it usually helps to talk it out with Robin. She lets him stumble through his thoughts, and doesn't mock him for messing up, or mixing up, words.
Goddammit, if he's really going to try talking this out with Eddie, he's going to have be open and honest and maybe a little vulnerable and he doesn't know if he can do that.
But he'll have to. For better or worse, he can't just keep Eddie at arms length. They need to either come to the conclusion that they can be friends, or not, and then go from there. (Also, he knows that Dustin will never let him know another day of peace once he learns that Eddie and Steve don't get along as well as he wants them to.)
In the end, Steve's not sure how long he just stares up at the ceiling but a sudden shout breaks him from his trance. It sounded like Dustin. Hellfire must have started.
Steve leaves his room to go lean against the half wall of the hallway, so he could look down to the dining table where everyone has gathered to play. No one notices him, so Steve sinks to the floor and turns, so he can lean against the wall, closes his eyes, and listens in.
The room below is filled with noise. Shouts of excitement, and groans of pain, and sighs of relief. Dustin yells at his dice when it rolls a Nat 1. Mike curses up a storm over a barely missed perception check that makes the party fall into a surprise round. He hears Lucas whoop happily and then what sounds like him taking several victory laps around the table.
He used to be an imaginative kid, able to easily conjure castle, and knights, and dragons in his mind's eye. Listening to Eddie describe a new location, or NPC, or monster makes it easy to bring that part of himself back. Eddie is descriptive and uses so many voices that Steve would be embarrassed to even attempt. But because Eddie is being descriptive, so is everyone else at the table. Erica has adopted an accent of some sort for her character. Dustin and Will go into great detail describing what they want their character to do. The older members of Hellfire do the same, and one of them is using an Irish accent that if he used while talking to Steve, he'd would think it was his first language.
Steve's not sure how long he sat there, long enough that they've taken a snack break and are back at it again, before he decides he might as well watch, too. He gets up and goes downstairs. There's a pause at the table when he wonders in and plops down on the couch. He makes eye contact with Eddie and offers a small half smile. Eddie grins back, and starts back into the game, pulling everyone's focus.
Watching is interesting. He gets to see the Party jab at each other, or lean over and whisper about something. It's nice, to see them being kids. Having fun.
They end around five and Steve is surprised at how quickly five hours had passed.
"So, Steve, how was watching your first DnD game?" Dustin asks, pausing on his way to the door to do so.
Steve considers teasing him, but he goes for honesty instead. "Pretty interesting. It might not be my last time observing. I gotta see you get killed sometime, right?"
"Rude, Steve. Rude," Dustin is grinning though.
"Tell your mom hi for me, and let me know when she's making pork chops again. I'd like to crash that dinner."
Dustin rolls his eyes and shakes his head but he hugs Steve before leaving. Between all the older Hellfire members, they all have rides home that aren't Steve or Eddie.
Speaking of the latter, he's slowly packing things away at the table. Clearly killing time so it won't look like he's intentionally staying after everyone's gone.
Soon, the house is empty again.
"So, I'm not sure... how to start this conversation," Eddie admits to the silence. He's still at the table, standing behind where he was previously sitting, fiddling with a die. "But, I'm sorry. For that day. You were right, you know? When you said I was lashing out at you first."
"Thanks. For the apology," Steve stands from the couch and moves to the table, toying with the tablecloth instead of looking at Eddie. "I, uhh, I'm not sure where to go from here, either? I spent such a long time angry at you. For pointing out all the things I'm bad at in front of everyone there. For making me feel like an idiot."
"I know. I'm sorry."
Now Steve looks up at Eddie. "You say that, but like, why? Are you sorry because what you did was shitty, or because you want to be my friend now?"
Eddie blinks, apparently thrown by Steve's question.
"Because, like, you were pretty dismissive of Lucas before Spring Break and he helped save your life. So, it's like, are you okay with being shitty if the people you hurt aren't people you like? 'Cause I used to be that way, and I'm not going to be friends with someone who is."
"Yeah, no, you're right," Eddie nods. "For all that I scream about conformity, and how stupid it is, I've been rather quick to dismiss everyone outside my own... group. I held rather close to that nerds verses jocks crap for too long. Lucas is a jock, but he's also a nerd, and so very loyal to his friends. And you- you're really fucking awesome."
"I am," Steve interrupts with a cheeky grin.
"Ass. But yeah, you're pretty awesome, and I've been feeling all fucked up today because, we could have been friends, couldn't we? In high school. If I'd just let you take the damn flier and kept my mouth shut."
"Hey, that's not all on you," Steve says. "I would have still joined the basketball team, and the swim team. And, like, I was so desperate for any shred of attention from my parents that I would never have picked Hellfire over sports meetups. I could have joined and still ended up a bully by sophomore year."
"Well, I didn't help-"
"I made those choices, Eddie. And it doesn't matter because it's in the past. So, like, we can just move forward. Start over, or whatever."
Eddie looks him up and down before giving one sharp nod, then breaking out into a wide grin, sticking his hand out for a handshake. "Hi. Name's Eddie Munson."
Steve laughs, reaching out to shake Eddie's hand. "Steve Harrington."
"Great, pleasure to meet you. Do you wanna hang out? We can play 20 questions. Get to know each other."
"Sure," Steve chuckles, extracting his hand from Eddie's. "Let me order some pizza first."
First time hanging out with Eddie alone. Guess they'll find out if they can be friends after all.
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sturniolowhore · 3 months
Text
☁️ to feel is to love
Tumblr media
summary ⎯ reader is on her period and matt decides to come over so he can comfort her (and basically the request)
warnings ⎯ matt x fem!reader, pure fluff
A/N ⎯ i'm sorry for how short this is but it was still fun to writee
i hope you enjoy <3
❛ ━━・❪ ִ ࣪𖤐 ❫ ・━━ ❜
matt walks into the living room where he finds his girlfriend curled into a ball on the couch, clinging onto her own body as though she has no other purpose. he smiles to himself at the sight briefly, recognising the fact that she's probably still in pain like she was when she texted him earlier that day.
"baby?" he calls out a little, making his way to sit beside her on the couch and frowning slightly when she merely groans in response.
"not feeling any better?" he continues to speak, beginning to softly stroke her back to provide her with some form of comfort because he's more than aware she ever so desperately needs it.
"no..." the word is short and simple, as well as a little muffled from her face being buried in one of the decoration cushions.
"can you sit up for me?" he asks her after a few short moments and with hesitation, she sits up, instantly clinging to his side and burying her face in the crook of his neck whilst her hands fly to grasp his lean torso.
he smiles softly at how eager she is to get close to him and the fact that she's also able to seek comfort within him. it honestly does wonders reassuring him; the way she's able to turn to him even when it seems as though she wants nothing but to suffer in silence and solitude.
"where does it hurt?" his voice is soft and welcoming as he questions her, his hands gently raking through her hair to ease the headache she undoubtedly has.
she sighs before she speaks up again, "literally everywhere but especially my back."
"have you taken any tablets?" his hands now move to her lower back, rubbing small circles as a means of trying to prevent the pain from getting any worse.
"they're not working," she groans for what feels like the millionth time, rubbing her temple with her hands and holding onto matt even tighter.
he pulls away from her a little and she frowns but quickly drops the expression when his gentle hands move to her back, kneading at the skin. she sighs out in pleasure, leaning into his touch to feel it better.
his hands are soft but rough at the same time, easing the ache in the perfect manner and she can already feel the tension in her limbs starting to dissipate. there's silence that lingers in the room but neither of them feels the need to break it. she's happy with the delicate feeling and he's beyond happy to provide it for her.
"feels so good matt, thank you," she sighs happily, making sure to let him know she's grateful for all he does for her.
"that's good, i want you to feel good," is his response and she simply can't help what she does next.
she shifts her head around a little, straining her back in the process but finding it worth it for matt. she presses a sweet kiss to his welcoming lips and smiles into the connection purely because of how appreciative she feels both now and always.
"turn around, i'm not done with you," he scolds her falsely and her grin widens as she shakes her head before following his instructions.
he removes her top so she can feel the palms of his hands better. she shudders a little when the cold air hits her directly but his warm hands are quick to replace the temperature. he continues to massage her, hitting all the right spots and kissing at her back to make her feel as best as he can.
when he's done with that, he pulls her backwards so that her bare back collides with his chest. he begins to pepper kisses all over her neck and collarbone, smiling to himself when he feels her body heating up rather than sees it. he doesn't stop though, his lips trailing across her skin in an attempt to reach every last spot he can, given the position they're currently in.
"so pretty," he mumbles against her neck and she turns around to kiss him again, her way of thanking him without having to say anything at all.
"i love you," the words are spoken against his lips and he giggles a little at the vibration he feels, making her laugh too because of how adorable it sounds.
"i love you baby," he replies once their laughter dies down and she gets the sudden overwhelming urge to cry.
he notices the slight shift in her demeanour instantly, frowning when he sees the water build up in her eyes. he pecks her forehead and then her cheek, swiping at the skin in comforting manner.
"i'm just emotional because of my period," she shakes her with a laugh before she follows, "i just love you so much."
he melts at her words whilst he rubs against her cheek tenderly. he loves the soft sound of her voice and the gentleness they can uphold without becoming uncomfortable. it's something he has grown to treasure; how easy it all is. how easy it is to be around her, to love her, to be himself. everything is easy and he can't even begin to explain in words how much he truly adores it.
"i love you so so much," he returns, beaming at her in the process before helping her put her top back on when he feels her shudder in his arms once more.
"i'm gonna go get you a hot water bottle," he tells her before standing up and making his way to the kitchen to boil some water.
she watches as he leaves, a delicate smile painted across her face at how she doesn't need to ask for him to do. things with matt feel effortless and she never wants that to stop. there's this sense of not needing to try too hard in the air to get what she wants or to feel loved and it makes her heart full beyond possibilities. she waits patiently, thoughts of her boyfriend circling her mind and a foolish smile adorning her features all at the same time.
when he's back in the room, a hot water bottle in his hand as promised, she just feels. it's a little strange that something so small makes her feel emotions so big but when it comes to matt, she doesn't know to distinguish between big or small. everything he does is so perfect and forms this big piece that settles so flawlessly in her heart.
he doesn't even hand her the bottle, simply takes a seat beside her and rests the hot water bottle in the exact position he always sees her placing it in. he doesn't let go either, merely holding it in place without so much as a simple complaint.
"i ordered waffles, i know you always crave desserts," he points out absentmindedly and she kisses his cheek immediately.
"what did i do to deserve you?" she mumbles with love cursing through her veins and he shakes his head at her fondly.
"what didn't you do?" is what he chooses to say and though the water bottle is providing an immense amount of heat, it is as though his words are sending the most heat through her.
❛ ━━・❪ ִ ࣪𖤐 ❫ ・━━ ❜
tags: @mattslolita @sturniolololover @mattsleftnipple03 @that-general-simp
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the-modern-typewriter · 10 months
Note
wgshdwgd im sorry if youre not accepting snippet reqs </333
but could i req you write abt a villain who *everyone* is genuinely terrified of. and then the hero just politely tells them to shut the fuck up. like, villain could be monologuing or smth and hero would cut them off saying that they would really appreciate it if villain could finish up in the next hour or so because they dont want to miss bargain day at the supermarket.
uwah im sorry if i broke any rules </33 stay safe its a crazy world out there <333
"-Could you please just shut up?"
There was a moment of absolute, horrified silence. One man promptly fainted. Nobody seemed to breathe for a few seconds.
The villain turned, slowly, towards the protagonist.
They were on their knees on the floor, surrounded by armed guards ready to execute the various staff still in their building. Their expression was one of exhausted long-suffering, one hand pinching the bridge of their nose as if to stave off a headache.
"Excuse me?" the villain asked, oh so softly.
"Will you please stop talking?" The protagonist dropped their hand, levelling the villain with a look. "Like, if you're going to slaughter the lot of us, just do it, don't make us listen to the spiel first. It's been forty five minutes."
"Are you so eager to die?"
"No. But if I'm going to die, I think I'd like to get it over with. Otherwise, I'd like to just go about my day. I need to buy food before the shop closes and takeaway costs a fortune. I mean, bloody hell. Forty five minutes. Do you really think anyone here is listening?"
The villain stared.
"Like, not to be rude," the protagonist said. "But they're all scared out their minds. They are not processing the finer points of your monologue. It's just so unnecessary."
"I could cut out your tongue and feed it to you."
"You don't have anything better to do?"
"I could cut out their tongues," the villain swept a hand around the room, "and feed them to you. That sorts out dinner, doesn't it?"
"I mean, I'm vegan, and not a cannibal, but I appreciate you're more concerned with being menacing than actually addressing the issue."
The villain stared some more.
The protagonist stared back.
"The data I need is still downloading," the villain said, after a long moment. "If I let you leave, someone will do something stupid like try and call the police."
"Sure, sure. But the monologue."
"You don't enjoy the sound of my voice?"
"I wouldn't take it too personally. It's been a week. Bit overstimulated, to be honest. Anyone's voice right now feels a bit like a cheese grater on my nerve endings."
"A bit like a cheese grater."
"No offense."
The villain blinked at them, slow and somewhat incredulous. "A cheese grater."
The protagonist shrugged.
"I'm assuming you didn't miss who I am in the last forty five minutes," the villain said.
"No."
"And yet."
"It's not that you're not terrifying," the protagonist said. "I just - forty five minutes. Humans aren't set up to be this stressed for forty minutes. My head is killing me. Processing all this - if you don't kill us - is going to be hard enough without having to fit in all the life admin I'm not currently getting done."
"Come here."
"...what?"
The villain crooked a finger to beckon the protagonist forward.
The protagonist swallowed, eyeing the villain warily, but didn't make them ask again. With a glance at the armed henchmen, they shuffled forwards to the spot the villain had gestured at their feet.
"You know," the villain said, "it's been a very long time since anyone has talked back to me."
"Sorry. I'm really not trying to be rude."
"No," the villain mused, head tilting with something alarmingly like curiosity as the protagonist came to a stop. "You're really not, are you? Turn."
"...turn?"
The villain gestured again, to indicate that the protagonist should face away from them.
"...You can't just give me all the orders at once? I get this is more dramatic, but I probably wouldn't be trying your patience as much if-"
The villain seized the nape of the protagonist's neck, like scruffing a kitten, making their breath catch.
Everyone watched for the inevitable torment. The punishment. The kill.
The villain's fingers dug into the knots of tension in the protagonist's neck, power sparking up the touch.
The protagonist sagged. "Holy shit," they breathed.
"Better?"
"Um. I mean - yes - but -"
"Good." The villain glanced up to the henchmen. "Shoot everyone else."
"What? Wait - no -"
The sound was deafening.
Then the silence was, once again, absolute.
"You didn't have to do that," the protagonist whispered. "I didn't mean - if I offended you -"
"Oh, you didn't, don't worry. That's why you're still alive. Tell me about yourself."
The villain's grip stayed unrelenting on the back of the protagonist's neck, holding them securely in place.
"T-tell-?"
"We still have ten minutes," the villain said, in a tone of great patience, "before the download completes. Tell me about yourself. I shouldn't be the one doing all the talking, after all. It's very rude of me, isn't it?"
Hesitantly, the protagonist talked, watching the blood pool on the floor. What else was there to do?
The computer finally gave a quiet beep to indicate that the download was complete.
"Good. Very good." The villain gave the protagonist's neck another gentle enough squeeze. "Now. Let's go grocery shopping," the villain said cheerfully. "Up you get. Dinner's on me."
1K notes · View notes