#Who would win in a fight? | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

glow-in-the-dark-death · 2 months

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Hunger

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Okay hear me out!

We have all talked about how Jason gets pit rage because of the Lazarus waters being gross ecto, or how his obssession is the Joker and needing to kill him and a bunch of other things,

Yes?

With me so far?

Okay!

Let me give that a twist,

That Pit Rage Jason feels is hunger, specifically a ghosts hunger.

Jason came back from the dead not fully, he's a starving ghost with a malnourished proto-core, until he properly eats it will stay weak and hungry.

How does the Joker fit in all this?

Easy, With the lack of good ecto for Jason to feed and stabilize from the next best option is his murderer.

Consuming that who killed you is very nourishing for a new ghost.

So Jason getting angry with the bats and others when they tell him not to kill the Joker or actively prevent him from even getting near him is like putting all his favourite foods right in front of him and then taking it away from him,

Each time getting worse for Jason, only getting hungrier and hungrier each time it happens.

How would you feel if you were starving and people kept offering you food and then pulling it away before you could eat it?

Confused?

Desperate?

Anger?

It doesn't count as cannibalism if you're not the same

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Jason biting the bars of his holding cell like a dog

Dick: "Is it just me or where his teeth always that sharp?"

~

Oracle: "I lost sight of the Joker!"

Jason hunched over with glowing green eyes while drooling: "No worries he's nearby I can smell him."

Other Bats listening on the comms: " ...What the hell do you mean smell ! Are you drooling ?!"

~

Bats: "Wow Jason sure is getting creative trying to get the Joker!"

Jason:

~

Check tags for some funny extras

~

Just an Idea

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gleefully-macabre · 5 months

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Sam Vimes, you absolute legend. Assassins Guild has his price set at $600,000 in a world where one person could live modestly on $30 a month. I believe, on the Roundworld, that’d be comparable to John Wick’s highest bounty of $40 million.

However unlike in John Wick, that’s still not enough for anyone to make the attempt.

#Sam vimes #the fifth elephant #discworld #John wick #I’m not saying Sam Vimes is more badass than John Wick #I’m saying Discworld assassins are faster learners than Roundworld’s #who would win in a fight?#they wouldn’t fight #they’d chill over cigars and maybe show pics of their kid/dog #gnu terry pratchett

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flannelepicurean · 5 months

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A Hannigram, a Lawrusso, and a Kakavege walk into a bar...

Okay so I was over on reddit going HAM in a thread about what would happen if your three fave OTPs were stuck in a room together for 24 hours. And I had SO MUCH FUN thinking about it, and writing up an absolutely crack-tastical summary, and I wanna share it with you mellifluous organisms.

The dynamic duos are Johnny Lawrence/Danny LaRusso (Lawrusso), of Cobra Kai; Hannibal Lecter and Will Graham (Hannigram), of NBC's Hannibal; and Goku/Vegeta (Kakavege) of Dragon Ball Z.

The room itself is... I'm picturing like, not quite a middle-school gymnasium, not quite a "this is definitely not a psychological experiment, just trust us on this," vibe.

Anyway, here's how it goes down:

Johnny and Goku become best friends almost immediately. Johnny offers him some slightly-expired sandwich meats from a random pocket while they're chillin' on some folding chairs, and Goku is like BOY HOWDY, WOULD I EVER!!!

Hannibal is disgusted by this. Danny is disgusted by this. Vegeta is just generally annoyed. They become The Mean Girls, they are a clique, now.

Will gets jealous and pouts in the corner. And starts scheming.

Johnny and Goku are insufferable. Two class clowns with "Wanna go ride bikes?!" energy, except middle-aged men who do martial arts. They CANNOT calm down. They CANNOT be tamed.

Will wanders by the Mean Girls table and suggests that Hannibal could easily outdo that fucking pocket ham, that's not even food, Hannibal knows food. And then he wanders away.

Hannibal preps a dinner party. Don't ask me how he got all this stuff. He probably just...found it in a closet. Don't anyone ask too many questions. Shh.

Danny's a teensy bit put off; for all his pretense to being almost high-society now, this is...really avant-garde. He's really boxed macaroni at heart, regardless of his quinoa. Before Johnny can even get a full, "WHAT THE FUCK," out, Goku and Vegeta are horfing down fish jello and unsavory Bostonians and the floral arrangements and everything like they've never been fed once in their entire lives.

Hannibal's pupils shrink. His stabbin' hand gets a little tense. Will smugs into his wine glass. Danny and Johnny hold very still. Then exchange a glance. Then hold very still some more.

The Saiyans, however, are fairly complimentary of the food, and Hannibal is a little torn. Goku’s like, “DO YOU HAVE MORE? IS THERE GONNA BE DINNER?” Hannibal sneaks a glance at Johnny, at the very edge of his peripheral vision, and gives a polite smile. Will sips wine.

Hannibal does his best to get Johnny alone so he can turn him into the main course. But he’s always running wild with Goku or hanging all over Danny when Goku decides to go bother Vegeta.

Goku keeps randomly asking about dinner. Not necessarily to Hannibal, just generally like, “Boy, I wonder when dinner’s gonna be,” and, “Man, I can’t wait for dinner!” and, “I wonder where he got the jiggly fish. I hope there’s jiggly fish again. The jiggly fish was good. Man, I hope we have dinner soon.”

Eventually Hannibal deputizes Will to try and get Johnny away from Danny, which Will agrees to with full spousal support appropriate of a murder husband.

Will asks if the Lawrussos can help them with the wine selection? They’re gonna need a really sophisticated palate to properly pair the beverages for the evening, with the many intricate courses, and they’re not serving beer, can’t get it for some reason, so if they can go over a very detailed list of notes on the flavor profiles of— And Johnny’s like NOT IT. But Danny gladly follows Will to the cellar (other corner of the room) for the Amontillado. There's a wine rack there, now.

Hannibal asks Vegeta if he could kindly guide Goku in setting the table, in preparation for dinner? Goku just about does a backflip. Hannibal provides an EXTREMELY complex diagram for the table setting that includes some entirely made-up utensils that he assures them are somewhere in the very extensive utensil kit. Or the credenza. Or several other pieces of cabinetry which now reside in the room.

Finally isolated with Johnny, Hannibal attempts some banter before going in for the kill. Johnny rags on him for being a nerd who dresses like a weirdo and talks like a book with no pictures on the cover and doesn’t even serve beer at a dinner party. Hannibal makes one packaged ham/long pig quip and leaps into action.

Johnny, however, is not exactly a stranger to knife fights, and he knows KARATE. So they have an instantaneous realization about each other, and one full-chested, “HEY, FUCK YOU, PAL!!!” later, we’ve got a Situation.

Danny and Will both immediately assess the Situation and rush in; Danny goes classic feral purse chihuahua, and Will goes rabid mongoose.

Goku and Vegeta turn away from their imminent crime of passion about where the goddamn ostrich spoons are, and fly over and hover above the situation for like… two seconds. They exchange a perplexed glance.

The Saiyans land on the periphery of the melee, and Vegeta fires one good blast into the ceiling, and everything screeches to a halt.

Goku starts making an impassioned speech in the “Have you forgotten the true meaning of Christmas?” genre. Except the point is that they were all supposed to be MAKING DINNER TOGETHER.

Hannibal’s pocket square nearly ignites from pure Had Enough of This Shit, but at the first twitch of that chef’s knife, Vegeta raises a hand like, “Bitch, don’t even try me.”

Goku summons a figurative Spirit Bomb onto the conflict to ask if they can please, please stop fighting…and just make dinner. He’s really hungry.

Danny realizes that, hey…he’s actually really hungry, too. And sometimes he gets a little hot-headed when he’s—

Will finally snaps and says, okay, enough is enough. You all think you’re so cute and adorable and interesting, but he does NOT find you that interesting, you are LOUD, and RUDE, and WEIRD, and he just wants to go home and spend some quality time with his HUSBAND. And his dogs!

Hannibal has a breakthrough realization, because Will didn’t say “dogs” first, and is like, Babe, I would never, I love you so much, OMG, you’re right, I’ll spend less time with my weird new friends and pay more attention to you. GASP! HOLY SHIT, WAS THIS A SCHEME, DID YOU SCHEME ME?! That's so romantic, I LOVE YOU, MONGOOSE!!!

Everyone kinda stares at them in horror. Danny’s like, “…Okay, that’s toxic.” And Johnny’s like, “Wait, were you gonna eat me?!” But Hannibal’s like, “Gentlemen, who here can say that we have not done something banana-butter-bonkersauce for the man we love?” And everybody just kinda looks away from each other extremely uncomfortably for a second. But then they grin at their partner a little.

And Danny’s like, “…You know, I bet I could make a mac and cheese in here…” And Hannibal’s like, “I think I saw some white truffles…”

✨And it’s a dinnertime miracle.✨

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fatherfigurefusion · 1 year

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Considering that Touya Aoyagi and Shoto Todoroki have a similar appearance and personality, I'm currently imagining Touya saying the following to a bunch of bratty kids:

"My name is not Four Layers. I am Touya Aoyagi from Vivid BAD SQUAD, and I want to surpass RAD WEEKEND. My father Harumichi is a well-known classical musician, but to be frank, I've always hated him and wanted to forge my own path in the world of music-"

#fusion's thoughts #project sekai #pjsekai #touya aoyagi #five weenies vs four layers #who would win in a fight?

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nerdpoe · 7 months

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When Danny decides to reincarnate, centuries after his adventures, he chooses a random Dimension of Heroes and Villains.

He's expecting adventure! Heroics! A life worth bragging about in the Afterlife!

He wakes up in a tube, staring down at surprised teen heroes as they release him and another person.

Later, he finds out that he's a clone of Batman and Superman, and the other clone is of Superman and Lex Luthor.

He came into this world expecting adventures, not a weird custody battle about him and his brother (because that's what Conner is) between two A-List superheroes.

#dpxdc #dcxdp #dp x dc #story prompt #dc x dp #phanfic #superman wants nothing to do with both of them #batman wins custody no problem #bruce now give clark a deathglare if the super even mentions one of the boys #constant sniping between superman and batman #until it eventually degrades their relationship so much they can't work together #culminates in one big verbal fight after another attempted planetary invasion #that ends with batman just losing it and #in a very calm voice that's totally out of place from his earlier growling #“if i'd known my best friend was the type of man who would target a child for the sins of their parents i might have chosen to be alone.”#verbally slaps clark #and that's how clark agrees to go to therapy

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silvercrane14 · 2 years

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Shimazaki >>>> Gojo I said what I said

No you’re right and you should say it

#crane answers #floof 👻#who would win in a fight?

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liauditore · 5 months

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it's gotta be you.

#bdoubleo fanart #bdoubleo100 #bdubs #trafficblr #secret life spoilers #traffic spoilers #my art #DON'T THINK ABOUT PEARL WANTING BDUBS TO WIN!!#DON'T THINK ABOUT PEARL HANDING OFF THE CLOAK TO BDUBS BECAUSE SHE NO LONGER HAS ANY NEED FOR IT!!#DON'T THINK ABOUT HOW BDUBS WHO HAS NEVER TRUSTED HIS ALLIES FULLY FINALLY HAS SOMEONE HE FULLY BELIEVES IN #TO THE POINT OF REFUSING TO BETRAY HER BECAUSE I QUOTE “SHE WANTS ME TO WIN”#DON'T THINK ABOUT PEARL WHO'S BEEN ISOLATED IN THE PAST FINALLY HAVING ALLIES WHO CARE FOR HER #DON'T THINK ABOUT HER TRYING TO RUN AWAY FROM BDUBS AND JOEL ONLY FOR THEM TO ASSURE HER THEY'RE NOT GONNA BETRAY HER #DON'T THINK ABOUT BDUBS TELLING PEARL AND IMPULSE HE DIDN'T THINK THEY WOULD FIGHT THE DRAGON WITH HIM.#DON'T THINK ABOUT BDUBS TELLING PEARL NO. SHE HAS TO WIN. BECAUSE HE CAN'T DO IT.#im so normal im so sorry #cw caps

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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 19 days

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Who will deal the most damage?

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #lan wangji #yu ziyuan #poll #Please note this is not a 'who would win in a battle if they fought each other'.#This is a 'who would be the scariest person to see on the other side of fighting ring.'#Yu Ziyuan knows how to do the bend and snap (a spine).#Lan Wangji has 20+ years of biting and scratching stored in his bones.#I missed the opportunity to give YZY sandals in pd-MDZS so I could properly say 'Yu Ziyuan con la chancla'.#However she's most likely wielding a heeled designer shoes. Steel tipped in the front and back.#As always there will be a follow up to the results of this poll. Who knows what that will be!#(I did make a 'bloodied up' version - but I didn't like it as much. Take this version as them *just before* they start the bloodshed.)#I'll post the alt on my twitter later on. For the fun!

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aprill-99 · 6 months

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Rhys: “So let’s see if I’ve got this; you have immense shadow power, incredible combat skills, height, tattoos, secrets, dead parents, a thirst for vengeance, the weight of the world on your shoulders, a rebellion to lead, and a dragon?”

Xaden: “Yeah? I mean, there’s also my girlfriend who I’m completely in love with and 107 people under my protection but-”

Rhys: *frantically flipping through papers* “this is the hyper-intelligent girlfriend with unprecedented lightning powers? The one you speak to with your mind and call a nickname permanently?”

Xaden: “I do only have the one girlfriend. Kinda offended you’d think otherwise.”

Rhys: *signs a paper* “Adopted. The rebellion thing is handled. Me and your aunts and uncles have got this. Your new mom is going to need some time to add you and your mate to the family portrait gallery. Your bedroom is upstairs, knives are in the training ring, family dinner is every Thursday, your allowance is infinity and your curfew is never.”

Xaden: “I am…. Older than your wife?”

Rhys: “Did I fucking stutter?”

#incorrect quotes #fourth wing incorrect quotes #fourth wing #incorrect acotar quotes #acotar #crossover #who wants to write it?#bat boys #xaden riorson #rhysand #you cannot tell me im wrong #Xaden would be adopted in 0.8 seconds flat #Violet and gwyn can hang out #Rhys and Azriel might have to fight over custody #Violet would have a lot of fun with the valkyries #Brennan has things to say about Night Court medical practices #Tairn Sgaeyl and Andarna have a lot of thoughts about Byraxis #if Xaden is 23 than he is factually at least 2 years older than the oldest we’ve seen Feyre and that’s objectively fucking funny #Rhys is in his Dad era and even if he weren’t Xaden is everything he looks for in adoptive family and IC members #Rhys thinks Xaden is baby brother shaped and Xaden thinks Rhys is a weird powerful guy who might be able to help him win the rebellion #Xaden needs a nap #Xaden is adaptable and he’ll roll with this #but damnit all if he’s not bringing Violet with him #Violet is sure something about this is funny #crack fic #crossover fic

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red-rover-au · 1 year

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@dianagj-art I feel like RR Leo would accidentally portal into One’s dimension and then disrespect him in his own house idk

Since RR Leo is a bitch, plz consider him making the following statement after he learned about One's whole deal regarding Draxum:

"Number one? That's hilarious. Draxum picked me between both of my brothers. You? He didn't have any other options. Number one as opposed to what? Zero? Wooow so impressive, you should be real proud, buddy."

He's only talking shit cuz the idea that there could be other Leo's who are better than him shakes him to his core lmao

#If our Draxum's knew about each other i think they would absolutely make One and RR Leo fight #who do u think would win???#i am so normal about both of our separated au's ddjsksb #rottmnt #rottmnt fanart #rottmnt separated au #au #separated au #red rover au #red rover art #art #my art #Leonardo #rottmnt leo

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notebooks-and-laptops · 1 year

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Dragon Age Ultimate Showdown: Who Would Win in a Fight?

#dragon age who would win in a fight #dragon age #cullen #merrill #da2 #dai #dao

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yardsards · 1 year

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what's this? there's a fight going on in the parking lot outside the tumblrwoman competition? well folks, it seems that the two finalists' girlfriends are fighting; place your votes now!

#eliot posts #tumblrwoman poll #homestuck #mspa #adventure time #at #terezi pyrope #princess bubblegum #vrisrezi #bubbline #idk what we're voting on here. who would win in an actual fight? who we like more? who is more of a tumblrwoman? which is the better ship?#it's up to you!

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s3znl-gr3znl · 6 months

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I saw a "who would win" post about Cooper and BT from Titanfall vs 621 and i cant stop thinking about how absolutely unfair this whole matchup is. Like what were they thinking? Do they know anything about the power scaling of either universe?

Youre asking a clunky 3m tall brick to fight something a minimum of 5 stories tall and 7x faster.

I love bt/coop but Im sorry they are not making it.

#who would win #fight #vs #jack cooper #bt 7274 #vanguard titan #titanfall 2 #armored core #handler walter #armored core 6 #augmented human c4 621 #mecha #ac6 #ayre #ac #armored core fires of rubicon

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arthursfuckinghat · 2 months

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just-null-cult · 3 months

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Kokichi, similar to Noritoshi in the sense that they're analytical and kinda tsun, but that's mostly it. This is another Megumi and Noritoshi situation where, on the surface, they appear to be very similar, but you squint and realize they're extremely different.

Whereas Noritoshi isn't as bold because he still holds remnants of pride, Kokichi is just shy about it since it's so new. He won't back down from it, just hesitate.

[Long ass rambles under the cut! + bonus doodles.]

When referring to shyness, Kokichi leans into the awkward and stiff type. There's always confusion and slight fear in his eyes when he's experiencing something new or romantic. He doesn't want to mess up, but if he does, he just hopes it works in his favor.

Being born in a body where he was under constant pain and stress, someone touching him was the last thing he wanted. He'd never known the loving touch of another because the heavens decided he wasn't allowed to.

After meeting you, that yearning to be next to you became too much. To hell with his restrictions. He'd to do whatever it takes to be able to be with you even if he had to sacrifice others to do it.

In retrospect, he feels like he should've done it sooner. Being touched or even grazed doesn't feel like his skin is falling off anymore.. Plus having both arms and working legs is always a good thing. It's new and odd, but not terrible. His mind never once wandered back and regretted those he's thrown under the bus because why would it?

Unfortunately, when his body was being healed, Mahito made him healthy.. and that's all. Knowing Mahito, he'd leave Kokichi to struggle with catching up to the rest of his peers by working for his own stamina, weight, and strength from square one. Though Kokichi isn't complaining much about it. He'd still take this rather than being stuck in that god forsaken tub for a second longer.

He used to hate being fussed over because of his illness. He prefers to do things on his own and now he can. Yet, Kokichi still gets pitiful looks on other's faces when he's too weak to carry something. It makes him want to spit at them, he can use Mechamaru to do his heavy lifting for now. He doesn't need a beefed up body to do it.

Unless you're the "beefed up" one fussing over him.. He doesn't mind it when it's you. In fact, Kokichi feels grateful when it's you, endeared even. He never feels belittled or pitiful when its you.. Only you.

Judging by how he treated panda for having the ability to interact with others in person despite being a cursed corpse, Kokichi has a number of insults and creative verbal abuse he's ready to spew out once someone tries getting a little too close to you. Scratch that, he's rude in general to those he isn't familiar with.

Kokichi has a lot of anger for those he deems ungrateful. What do you expect from someone who thought he was gonna rot in a bathtub for the rest of his life to do? Not harbor resentment? Luckily, he holds just as much, if not more, love for you who he's unbelievably grateful for!

Your affection is so odd to him, a new experience that he never knew he could grow to yearn for. It's not terrible, quite the opposite. It's so wonderful he can't get enough. Every time you're around, he wants to have at least one hand on you at all times. Doesn't matter where, just as long as he feels you're around. Safe to say, he's extremely touch starved.

Oh how Kokichi would drop everything for a walk with you. He'd use every Mechamaru he had just to make sure no one disturbs either of you. Murder is just a side effect if they get too persistent. He just wants to spend time with you!

Though he likes walks, he still gets out of breath easily. Walking is nice, but he still needs time to get used to it. Offering to help will only cause him to lean against you, it's not too difficult, he doesn't weigh much for better or worse. He loves when you lend him a hand, it's just another reason to get close to you.

When you part, it's only natural that Kokichi gifts you a little trinket he made. Rejecting it will only reward you with the most devastated frown, so just accept it. If you get rid of it when coming home, it somehow always finds its way back to you? Destroying it will lead to Kokichi giving you another one.

Yes, it follows and watches you, but it's just to keep you safe! Who knows what could happen. Whether or not the little trinkets are subtle, all depends on how you reacted to him asking if it was alright to know your location at all times when he's not around. Kokichi is understanding if you're not okay with it. He'll just make his gifts extra subtle so you wont know he's watching.

He just wants to be by your side constantly, even if he's not able to be there in person. Watching you through a screen gives him a sickly familiar feeling in the pit of his stomach, but it's better than not knowing what you're doing. He can even pick up little things about you this way for when he sees you next time! This is nothing but a win-win in his mind even if others beg to differ.

Kokichi never felt blessed. Not once since the day he was born, not until he found you. You who he feels is truly a gift from the heavens. You who he would give up everything to have. In a way, Kokichi is delusional. He sees you as the reason he got a heavenly restriction. It was as if other worldly forces tried to keep him at bay from pursuing you, but you're also the reason he broke his restrictions. He now has the body he wished for thanks to you, his drive, his motivation, his purpose, his love.

[extra shit]

Kokichi’s so fucking low key about being a chuunibyou. you're telling me he named his mech after an anime he watched. half his attacks have ultimate or ultra in the name.. HE MADE A FUCKING MECH. Your ass can't tell me he didn't watch anime while growing up and got inspired to make it a reality. He probably watched Evangelion or something.. Woah, anime dates with him where he makes your favorite creature and uses it to his advantage.. woah.

[Bonus Kokichi verbal abuse]

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk #kokichi muta #muta kokichi #kokichi muta x reader #muta kokichi x reader #mechamaru #mechamaru x reader #jjk x reader #welcome mob kun to the cult.. im so sorry that you have to be our sacrificial lamb to these psycho's bullying #tl;dr kokichi is a little shy bc everythin is new but hes still open to everythin. hes just an obsessive freak for you ykyk #i love kokichi.......... dont you love him?? hes so good bro #can you see how hard im snorting copium to make up my au where hes alive #i had to put some yan into him BUT LISTEN TO ME IM NOT EVEN TRYING TO MAKE HIM A FREAK BRO #HES LITERALLY JUST LIKE THAT AND ITS SUCH A SHAME ITS NOT USED MORE #“there was someone who i loved. and i didnt care what happened to the world as long as i could be by her side and protect her”#“even if that girl didnt want me to be the one to protect her.”#HE WAS DOWN TO SACRIFICE THE WORLD?? MF HUH?? YOU WERE GONNA BETRAY EVERYONE BC YOU THOUGHT YOU COULD FIGHT. WIN. AND FIX IT??#AND YOU WOULD FR STILL BE THERE EVEN IF THE ONE YOU LOVED DIDNT LIKE YOU BACK???#DUDE?????#WHAT THE FCUK KOKICHI WHAT THE FUCKKKKK #ong idk if theres a handful of kokichi enjoyers out there or its one person asking for him specifically but i see you...#i'll feed you my starving cult member.....#THIS IS THE ONE I POSTED ON ACCIDENT SO SORRY FOR THE DELAY AND MISHAP ANON. I LOVE YOU.#shout out to salsamander who caught me slacking #im not sorry for the LowTierGod reference

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ghost-bison · 4 months

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Random thought but imagine how crazy it would be if Donna Noble met Crowley from Good Omens... They're both completely unhinged, smart with dumbass energy, and they're red heads. Aziraphale and the Tenth Doctor would have their hands full with those two

#they would probably get into an epic fight #and ten and az would sit back eating popcorn and taking bets #donna would win obviously #doctor who #good omens #donna noble #anthony j crowley #crowley #aziraphale #tenth doctor #fourteenth doctor #catherine tate #david tennant #michael sheen

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