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#alfred pennyworth is the boss
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Work Time
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Alfred: "Master Bruce it is time for your board meeting."
Bruce: "I'm working on... Do I absolutely have to go?"
A: "Yes!"
*30 minutes later*
A: "Haven't you forgotten something, Master Bruce?"
B: "No, I didn't."
A: "The suit!"
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bruciemilf · 9 months
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"Alfred is way too chill with what Bruce is doing" my good bitch it's probably because Thomas and Martha were 10x worse. Bruce is like a sundae ice cream compared to those two
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frownyalfred · 1 year
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I 100% believe Bruce runs around playing undercover boss at all of the Wayne Foundation services. He’s too curious and too good at undercover work not to try. They’ll be serving dinner at a soup kitchen and he’s just in the corner, sipping on broth, watching Larry from management scream at the workers and mentally drafting the email to the executive director.
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Alfred has an army of roombas under his control (he can't vacuum all of Wayne Manor on his own, he's good but he's not that good). When someone is foolish enough to invade the manor, he unleashes Stabby the Bat-Roomba. What was initially Duke and Steph being silly has now racked up two dozen severed Achilles' Tendons of those who would be stupid enough to threaten the family.
One time Bruce got injured and was out on bedrest. He got up to do some light detective work, as you do, walked out of his room, saw a dozen roombas coming his way being led by a roomba with a mask and a knife and wisely chose to go back to bed because it’s not good to Detective while hallucinating. Down the hall and around the corner Alfred gave a sharp nod of satisfaction.
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to-the-stars8 · 1 month
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The Waynes' Nanny Chapters
Batfamily and Reader, Bruce Wayne x Reader
Ao3
Summary: One day, after getting fired from your job by your ex, you somehow ended up in Wayne Manor as the family's new nanny. Working with six kids is tough enough, but the handsome, rich, and emotionally confused father, billionaire Bruce Wayne, who is just too charming makes it a bit more difficult as your feelings for him confuse you. Nonetheless, you love the job and the kids, but soon enough you realize that maybe you're falling in love with the boss, too.
The Pilot Pt. 1 The Pilot Pt. 2
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human-space-heater · 6 months
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Incorrect Batam Quotes Part 4
Bruce: Tim, please calm down. Tim: I asked for two large fries! Tim: dumps fries onto table Tim: But all they did was give me a MILLION FUCKING LITTLE ONES!
Dick: You look like a corpse that was just pulled out of the river. Jason: Wrong. I look like a cool rock star who just OD'd in their own pool. Big difference.
Steph: How would you like your coffee? Cass: As dark and as bitter as my soul. Steph, shouting to someone behind the counter: I need one vanilla latte with extra cream and sugar!
Dick: Does immaturely insulting me make you feel better about your sad single life? Jason: It actually does.
Dick: If you got arrested what would be the charges? Tim: Theft. Steph: Disturbing the peace. Damian: Aggravated assault. Babs: Arson. Jason: All of the above. In that order, probably.
Steph: FIGHT ME, YOU NERD ASS SLUT! Alfred: At least try to sound slightly more sophisticated when you threaten someone. Steph: Oh, I'm sorry. I should ask; dost thou want to engage in a duel, my good bitch? Alfred: Somehow that's worse.
Jason: Thank you for not saying "I told you so." Cass: When you’re as right as I am, you don’t have to say it.
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quotidian-oblivion · 6 months
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I remember way back around October, I was in irl Mrs. Barah's English class, opening up the word document which held a rant I had typed the night before. This was the rant:
Jason blinked. “Who’s Tim Drake?” Jackie shook her head, eyes wide. “He’s only the legend and leader of the school. You know, a lot of people compare him to the likes of a mafia boss?” “Like, here’s a freshman who is an actual 12-year-old. Easy bait, right?” a student piped up. “Wrong. The so-called “12-year-old” is not only academically smart, but also politically smart.” Another student nodded, saying, “It had been barely three months and he already had blackmail on half the bullies in the school. He made deals and truces with the other half of the bullies. The minor ones cower before him, because in a span of three months, he’s managed to become all chummy-chummy with the big guys, when they’ve been trying for three years.” “No one has met a single person in the history of the school who is friends with the bullies, the students, and the teachers,” Jackie added. “Plus, he’s offering homework help and occasionally accepting candy as payment? Well, sign me up. Actually, I did sign up. I’m almost getting all grades above B on my final report card.” Alexander added ominously, “Majority of the girls think he’s adorable. The majority of the boys think he’s cool. The mean girls bend to his every will. The jocks give him hi-fives and fist bumps in the corridors and stick up for him in P.E. Not that he needs much, he’s so smart that he used freaking science to defeat everyone in dodgeball. Something about velocity reducing when standing at the very back? I don’t know, man.” One of the other students said, “The nerds ask him for tips on how to play chess and dungeons and dragons. The older theater kids ask him out for group milkshake parties. The prom queen and king asked him to be a chaperone on their first date. The teachers think he's a charm.“ “And all the janitors keep him up to date on new facilities and latest gossip,” a janitor walking by said. “We even made a copy of every key at the school for him, don’t tell the staff though.” Jackie turned back to Jason, “The kid is a legend. A real legend known under the name of Timothy Jackson Drake."
Obviously it's edited to be more comprehensible and integrated in the fic, but that was the gist of it. And from that rant, I wrote two series (and some fics in the Mafia Files and Packages that other cool writers co-wrote).
Two series that has been going on for a full year now.
But today, they both end. The whole AU ends. And it does so, with this fic:
Thanks for being here
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felidacy · 26 days
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Rambles and small ideas for a Batfamily Bloodborne AU
(It is not that cohesive I am sorry and I was forced to make some lore changes. Especially with how it begins. Don't beat me up about it.)
Gotham gets enveloped by a dark shroud that covers the whole city and makes it near imperishable, let alone letting people pass through. The city is forever shrouded in a dark loom with merely a everlasting full moon shining upon them. With no sun and the isolation, it soon takes a tool on the people. They grow sickly and depressed, if not that they become near deranged and highly irritable. Crime rates in the already vicious city steadily increase.
There is a sudden shift then - for the worse. A blood moon occurs and people begin to change. Their bodies twist, grow and even rot away. Meanwhile their humanity seems to decrease. A few attempt to research the phenomenon and hold them captive in facilities like Arkham Asylum or Blackgate Prison, however those are halted when the victims fully cease being humans and transform into eldritch monsters that lash out when the old blood gets overused by the Healing Church. A mass outbreak occurs and the monsters roam the city from then on.
Tim Drake is still in the position of the CEO Wayne Enterprise after the mysterious disappearance of the Gotham Prince (Bruce Wayne) and openly funding doctors and scholars in his tower to research their Gotham phenomenon and the monsters. He takes over the Role of Provost Willem and does not shy away from finding out the truth by any means necessary. He isolates himself because of his hunger for knowledge and shuts people out.
Researchers of his discover the tombs/Labyrinth and the usage of the old blood when coming across Ebrietas, some desperately trying to change his opinion and use blood healing to attain a new beginning. Tim is forced into a position where he needs to give up on his constant desire of evolution and progress, which goes against his nature, for the sake of the people and instead how far he can go sacrificing himself in order to attain knowledge that makes him look beyond the "now". His good-hearted start for the peace of humans turns into a obsession to achieve something which is beyond the capability of a mere human.
Damian has been put in a dire position, a child that hears and dreams of the voices of those beyond that nobody else can comprehend. With his artistic skills he puts down the words after transcribing them, he holds the Role of Runesmith Caryll. He desperately attempts to hold on to sanity as he hides himself away from all prying eyes despite the praise of those around him. He only ever hears the words of the Great Ones now.
Two people Tim trusted most "betrayed" him, Tam and Cass that take on the Role of Laurence as his trusted students that end up leaving him. Cass knew that Stephanie must secretly be alive and after having grown immensely close to her not-sister-not-lover, she could not live with herself if she didn't rescue one she loved. She had lost too many already and followed Tam, along with others. Tam had noble intentions much like Cass, although Tam held more resentment for Tim. Her father was affected by a terrible illness that was since then called the Ashen Blood and even after dozens of years where he was loyal to the Wayne family he did not wish to use the old blood to heal him. He actively even discouraged her. Tam gave her goodbyes one day to never see Tim again and began the Healing Church. To her disappointment Dr. Leslie Thompkins was not one of those that followed after them and when the blood failed to heal her father, instead actively killing him, it were Tim and Leslie that got blamed. Since then Tam began desiring evolving into something greater through the use of the blood in order to bring him back. While Cass worked as a blood minister (later on white Church hunter), Tam focused later on at the work of seeking contact with the Great Ones and became the leading figure of the Choir.
Leslie Thompkins suffers a cruel fate. Her loyalty to save the people and towards Tim cost her greatly and when Tim gets the epiphany that more eyes are needed to understand the Great Ones and evolve, she is one of those that get affected and turn into one of the many hundred eyed monsters roaming the tower and trapping Tim there.
The Healing Church grows in power as their influence in Gotham rises because of their special infected blood that heals those in dire need should they come to them. Gotham citizen began to practically worship the Healing Church when gods they previously believed them did not act and show mercy, others turned away out of fear and that soon enough began to rule the city. The Healing Church becomes a belief, a bloody beacon of hope in their endless night...a cult.
When the sickness of the Ashen Blood spreads the people falsely believe in The Healing Church and that they will save them. Instead the bridges connecting the lands to each other get torn down when they least expect it and watch on as the other half gets overrun by beasts and the ravaging sickness alike. To make sure nobody ever passes through the remains get bordered up. Tim remains on the other half in his Tower overlooking the raging City with a faraway gaze.
They mainly reside in the abandoned underground of Gotham and at the edge of the Bowery, planted right at the opposite site of the Wayne Tower, and gets called the Labyrinth as the layout changed under the influence of the shroud. In time the Healing Church began to change and it split into various branches, the Choir, the school of Mensis and the Hunters of the Workshop that evolve into the Church Hunters.
Jason and Dick had been getting Damian out of old Gotham when the great fire happened and they were unable to return to their left behind sibling. They desired to hid Damian from the Healing Church because of his connection to the Great Ones and there was no better hiding spot than directly under their nose. As such they've become hunters for the Church.
One faithful day Barbara after a long search discovers Damian when he is having one of his seizures, when he dreams of the Great Ones, and she desires to help him. She has been kept in the dark as she had been stuck in the Clocktower until the Healing Church came to free her, which causes her to make unwise decisions by mistakingly trusting Tam and Cass. Unknowing of what occurred with the lack of still functioning technology she was part of the School of Mensis. However upon touching the Great Ones overwhelm her mind and her sanity crumbles. Barbara holds the Role of Micolash. After she becomes aware of herself again she causes the School of Mensis to break away from the Church and just like Tim to find and use an unbiblical cord of the Great Ones.
Stephanie was one of the few that broke through the shroud even when nobody knows why she was permitted through. Trusting her idol and not-lover her ignorance of the state of matter makes her join Barbara. The use of the Cord brings blocked memories back to Stephanie as she recalls that she faked her death because of her pregnancy, just shortly before the shroud fell over Gotham. In fact she does not recall what she had done those months outside of Gotham, neither were the supposed baby was. That is when the Great Ones enlighten her when she connects to Mergo. That child was never born as she went through horrible complications early on and lost it, although there was no body. The child was not of human descent, but of a Great One. Broken apart by this knowledge the Cord pulls Stephanie, Barbara and others of the School into a nightmare state where they remain forever trapped while their physical bodies die. She is the Queen of Yharnam.
Alfred was thought to have died that night when the Great fire happened as he had been away from the Wayne Tower, yet neither with Damian in the Manor. However, as it turns out Alfred had gone to seek out Tam and Cass in hopes to change their minds. When he thought all his wards dead when the land was burning there was no other way than to stay with his last remaining: Cass. And as someone who only ever knew how to work through grief by helping others, he had become the leader of the old Hunters Workshop. He was Gehrmann. Still caught in his own grief the purpose was ripped from him again and he was left alone, a mistake. Like many he called upon the Great Ones and as such started the dream, the start of it all with a promise that needed to be fulfilled.
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thatthirdtriplet · 2 months
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Relationships:
Jason Todd & Bruce Wayne Tim Drake & Dick Grayson & Jason Todd & Bruce Wayne Dick Grayson & Jason Todd Tim Drake & Jason Todd
Characters:
Jason Todd Tim Drake Bruce Wayne Dick Grayson Alfred Pennyworth Original Characters
Additional Tags:
First Meetings alternate Universe - Different First Meeting kid Tim Drake Kid Jason Todd teen Jason Todd High School alternate Universe - School protective Jason Todd Jason Todd is Robin hurt Jason Todd POV Jason Todd Jason Todd Feels good Sibling Jason Todd brotherly Bonding brotherly Love Tim Drake-centric Tim Drake Needs a Hug Jason Todd Needs A Hug hurt Tim Drake good Sibling Tim Drake protective Tim Drake BAMF Tim Drake Tim Drake Has Issues Tim Drake Gets a Hug Jason Todd Gets A Hug child Abuse Good Sibling Dick Grayson Bruce Wayne is a Good Parent bullying not for the whole fic Abusive Parents absent Parents child Neglect abusive teacher angst fluff/Comfort emotional Hurt/Comfort Tags Are hard auther Is Sleep Deprived theater Nerd Jason Todd theater Nerd Tim Drake sadly i knew that wasnt going to be a tag rated for Jason's Language rated For Violence POV Tim Drake POV Alternating Genius Tim Drake manipulative Tim Drake crime Boss Tim Drake mafia Boss Tim Drake case Fic only some chapters bad Parents Jack and Janet Drake bad Parent Janet Drake bad Parent Jack Drake bad Parent Willis Todd Tim Drake Lacks Self-Preservation Instincts Tim Drake Joins the Batfamily Early corporal Punishment Alfred Pennyworth is the Best Jason Todd Loves Classic Literature accidental Baby Acquisition accidental Sibling Acquisition
Summary:
I think the title really explains it all? But anyway:
Jason knew that attending a rich ass school was going to be the toughest and most mind-grating thing ever. His beliefs were confirmed when he got cornered by bullies on his first day. The only thing he was surprised about was that it took them so long to find the school's new street rat. Just as he's about to be punched, a fucking 10 year old (he's actually 12) steps in and... starts threatening the bullies? And they actually listen?? What the fuck???
And that isn't the only surprise that's waiting for him.
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brokenbrds · 3 months
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twistedtummies2 · 4 months
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Year of the Bat - Number 19
Welcome to Year of the Bat! In honor of Kevin Conroy, Arleen Sorkin, and Richard Moll, I’m counting down my Top 31 Favorite Episodes of “Batman: The Animated Series” throughout this January. TODAY’S EPISODE QUOTE: “Hit me, Riley! Maybe I’ll wake up and be a millionaire, too!” Number 19 is…The Forgotten.
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Much like an earlier entry, “Christmas With the Joker,” I’ve always been surprised by how little appreciation this episode gets. For a long time, all the reviews and responses I found for this particular episode were typically negative ones. It hasn’t been till more recently that more positive reactions have started cropping up, as far as I can tell. Interesting, because this has honestly been one of my favorite episodes since I was still a kid. It’s a great example of a story where the power of it comes not from Batman fighting some supervillain, but more from the internal and external struggles of the characters, in a more unnervingly real kind of adventure than most. The story begins with Bruce going undercover as a down-on-his luck thug by the name of Gaff Morgan. Why is he doing this? Well, it turns out that all across Gotham, various poor and homeless people have been disappearing. Batman wants to find out why, so he figures the best way to do this is to make himself into bait. The plan works too well, however: in a battle with some ne’er-do-wells, he’s knocked unconscious and ends up getting amnesia. “Gaff Morgan” wakes up and finds himself working at a forced labor camp in a remote gold mine. The kidnapped people all act effectively as a slaves, serving under a cruel and slobbish gold baron known as Boss Biggis. Morgan must find a way to save his newfound friends in the camp, and bring the disgusting Biggis to justice…but in order to do that, he must first remember who he really is. This episode plays out less like a typical Batman story, and more like a prison film. Bruce/Gaff makes allies in the mining camp, and has to get by through the trials and tribulations working in harsh conditions, with horrible punishment hanging over his head if he displeases his superiors. As the episode goes on, Bruce starts to have flashbacks and regain memories, and the dream sequences that result from this are both surreal and at times deeply unnerving. My favorite is a scene where Bruce has a vision of his old self, laughing inside of a mirror…then, as he gets closer, the reflection transforms into the Joker, who grabs hold of Bruce and drags him through the looking-glass, the pair plummeting through space. It’s a haunting moment, and by far the most memorable scene in the story. Once Batman regains his memories, we get all the action-packed shenanigans we’d hope for, as he chases Biggis and his cronies through the mines and ruins the camp. While much of the story is either bleak or bizarre, there is some humor to it, as well. Most of it comes from Alfred: there’s this wonderful subplot where Alfred has to play detective a bit himself, to try and figure out where Bruce has gone, and it’s easily one of the character’s best moments in the show. The scene where Alfred has to fly the Batwing is particularly entertaining, and another major highlight of the episode for me. Again, this isn’t one that a lot of people talk about or seem to consider with great acclaim, but it’s definitely a personal favorite for me. I’ll confess it has dropped somewhat on my rankings than where it would have stood, say, ten years ago, but it’s still worth watching if you haven’t seen it. And if you have, give it another look; it may be better than you remember.
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Tomorrow we move on to Number 18! Hint: “Some thought I had gone mad. Others thought I always had been, until they put me where I belonged.”
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ALFRED THE SPIRIRT OF VENGEANCE
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the STACHE tho
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bruciemilf · 3 months
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Any hot takes or opinions about Leslie, Alfred and Jim Grodon?
OH!!
Alfred listens to gangster rap in his free time, but, he listens to female artists exclusively. In all genres. “Men speak enough, don’t you think?”
He can mimic any accent under the sun. EXCEPT for the “Jersey girl buying energy drinks at a gas station” one.
He just can’t bring himself to. Tim has this theory that their beloved shotgun grandpa isn’t even British and he’s faking it. He’s willing to die on the cross for it.
Leslie used to write Jason’s gym passes when he had to skip. Either because some rogue got a little too rowdy (and by God, she feels just a minuscule bit worse for them after Bruce is done with them)
I don’t know if this is feasible at all, but she somehow convinced his gym teacher he can’t participate cause he’s on his period. “…Well, this is Gotham, I guess. “
I think Jim gets into fights with the moms from his Facebook group, — specifically, his PTA group. (It truly depends on what version of Barbara you prefer, — but I love her in The Batman 2004)
Alfred keeps Martha’s wedding ring on his left hand and Thomas’ on his right. He only takes them off when he patches Bruce up. And he has their last words tattooed on his back ^^
Jim is sick and tired of Bruce dipping in the middle of their conversations, so he handcuffs them together until they’re done.
Maybe even a bit after. They should get to spend time together. (Harley Quinn series I see you and I hear you
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dcxdpdabbles · 8 months
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DC x DP: Dog Walker
Danny needs someone to walk his dog.
He had been in Gotham for about five months when it became apparent he needed companionship.
Ever since Clockwork and Frostbite came to the same decision to move Danny to a new universe for his health- his core was deteriorating due to his obsession being fulfilled as Amity Park was safe, and everyone was ready to grow up and move on.
So Danny moved to a rough city in a harsh universe so that the danger could help his core restart his obsession.
The first few weeks were fine; he even found work as a computer program designer that allowed him to work from home thanks to his universe's advanced technology, but soon, he struggled with loneliness and homesickness—that was where his dog came into the picture.
He adopted Equinox- Nox for short- from the local shelter, and while Nox was a mutt with unknown parents, Danny had no trouble taking care of him.
That was until he accepted a job offer at Wayne Enterprise, and his work hours shifted from remote work seven days a week to four days. He wasn't stimulating Equinox properly by keeping him inside the three days he was out and his poor boy was suffering from it.
This could have easily be solved with a pet sitter or just a dog walker but this is Gotham. Danny knows he picked this place for its constant danger to keep his obsession active but he just wasn't expecting Gotham to be so...much.
He had a panic attack just thinking about what would happened to Nox if he trusted just anyone to take care of him.
Nox is the only living being that is under his Protection. It went against his very Instincts to not find someone he trusted utterly to walk him.
Danny checks his phone to see Nox peaceful sleeping in his doggy bed and sighs. His boy has been sleeping more and more lately, losing his bright spark.
"Whats wrong Danny?" Karla, one of the Office interns, asks from where she is walking along side him.
"Nothing, it's just my dog needs to go for a walk, and I'm not there to give him one." He says, turning the screen. "I wish I can have some one walk hin for me-"
"Understood. I shall pick up your dog tomorrow, Fenton," a tiny voice cuts in. The two turn around only to look down at the green eyes of Damian Wayne. His bosses' son and brother. Oh boy.
"Ugh, I'm sorry?" He blinks as the youngest, Wayne thrusts a piece of paper at him. Danny has no choice but to hesitantly takes the paper. On it is a professional if short resume belonging to Damian that highlights his skillset and community service.
"Father has informed me of the family tradition started by our Pennyworth. Every Wayne gets a part-time job from twelve to grow character." The boy says, hands behind him and back straight, appearing every bit his status. Also, it is like a little kid trying to appear as an adult. Danny found it kind of cute, and it reminded him of Jazz. "I have multiple experiences with animals, as you can see from volunteering at the local shelters. My fees for my services are also meager and would surely not be difficult to cover."
Danny's core turned cold, but not in the wrong way. It was a cooling sensation he had associated with a fun day of either a snowball fight or the fresh first fall. He knew he could trust the boy.
"You know what? Yeah I love it if you walked my dog. In fact would you be interested in being a dog sitter?"
The boy's green eyes brightened with childish glee, but he tried to remain serious. Danny's heart melted at the sight. Oh, he should call Jazz soon. "That would be most acceptable."
Unknown to Danny, Karla, or Damian, Dick Grayson watched the trio as his brother handed one of the most mysterious employees a resume. Now, why would Fenton want to be close to Damian?
Over the last few months, people have been trying to take advantage of Damian because they thought his brother stupid for his mixed blood, just as they did when Bruce first took him in.
Danny doesn't mind Alfred's rule to find a part-time job to help teach them values, but he finds people aren't as kind as they should be. He'll have to keep an eye on this Danny Fenton.
Maybe he can help co-sit his dog.
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Alfred keeps Green Lantern AND Green Arrow themed bandaids, hospital gowns, and slippers among other things in the med bay portion of the Cave for special occasions, also known as Bruce doing stupid things on patrol. Alfred got a few of the things as special commissions. The Batman themed pajamas are only for Batmen that arrive back at a reasonable hour with no easily avoidable injuries.
After one particularly terrible evening Alfred acquires an adult-sized Superman bed (like those race car beds except superman) and a Constantine-themed duvet set that he designed himself because his point will be made.
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to-the-stars8 · 1 month
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The Waynes' Nanny
Batfamily and Reader/ Bruce Wayne x Reader Chapters Ao3
The Pilot Pt. 2
Walking into the dining room, your bunny slippers pink and prominent, you stretched and yawned out a ‘hello’. It was wonderful falling asleep in a mansion, and even more so when you spent some time in the lavish bathtub attached to your room. It almost made you not want to leave to go downstairs. Yet, you knew there was a job to be done. The children commented on your colorful robe and slippers, astounded that you showed up to breakfast in such attire. Mr. Wayne seemed amused and commented as such, playfully saying that he wished he owned the same bunny slippers you did. You offered to lend them to him, and he rejected the idea. 
Sitting at the table, you playfully scolded Alfred, “You should tell me these things. A simple dress for breakfast would have been fine.”
“Forgive me, Miss, I assumed you knew,” He said, slightly smiling, as he set a breakfast plate in front of you. 
You shook your head, smiling at the plate of food. “I’m from downtown Gotham, Alfred. You have to assume I know nothing.” You looked around the table, watching as they looked at you with surprise. “What? I got something on my face?”
“You’re sitting at the table,” Duke said shyly. 
You looked to Bruce, expecting him to say something, but he didn’t as he continued to eat his food. “Where else am I supposed to sit?”
“The kitchen,” Dick replied bluntly. 
You blew him off. “That’s so old-fashioned, and I’m too social for that. Now, what’re we doing today?” 
The kids told you they would need to leave the house since Mr. Wayne would be holding a charity dinner party that the children were not invited to. Not that you said it aloud, you were less than impressed by Bruce’s lack of involvement with the kids in things. So, you offered to take them to buy clothes and other things, and Mr. Wayne was happy enough to lend you his credit card. You marveled at the black American Express card, never thinking you’d see one in person—Let alone hold one. 
Suddenly, Alfred re-entered the dining room to tell Mr. Wayne that Lucius Fox was on the phone for him. You got up soon after, taking your plate full of food, and told the kids that you were leaving to get dressed, happy as a clam with your new position.
Dick was reserved, openly hostile toward you, and didn’t like the idea that now there was even more of a reason for Bruce not to be involved. You automatically made a note to force Bruce to be more active in his kids' lives and shake the eldest's rough exterior. 
So, when you arrived at the clothes shop, one your friend owned, of course, you spent more time picking out his clothes. Dick seemed like, well, a dick. He was as clever as he was spiteful and attempted to attack you at every angle. You persisted, though, while managing the other kids' wardrobes. 
Dick huffed and went to sit in one of the waiting chairs on the other end of the small boutique, seething in silence. You left him there for a bit, doting on the other children who were pretty well-behaved, albeit a bit odd. Tim had been looking under the mannequins’ skirts to see if they were anatomically correct—and, you knew instantly that would be a conversation with his father. 
As Duke and Jason were trying on ties, you finally looked over to the teenager brooding in the corner. You went over to him, holding up a red tie to his neck before taking the blue one from Damian’s small hands, who was on your hip, and doing the same. Dick was less than impressed. 
“Blue, it compliments your eyes,” You said. 
Dick huffed. “Why’re you doing this?” 
“Because I think you guys should go to that dinner tonight.” 
Before Dick could say that wouldn’t happen Cassandra stumbled over holding out a dress that she wanted to wear, but he wasn’t too dissuaded by that. He insisted that they wouldn’t be going to the dinner party.
Cassandra, even more clever than her older brother, nicely said, “I think the blue tie would suit you, Dickie. It brings out your eyes. It makes you super, super handsome.” 
He stared at her for a moment before saying, “You’re a bitch, you know that?”
Cass smiled, turning on her heel to walk off, leaving you to scold Dick as Damian slowly became more and more irritated with your arm. 
Dick only snapped at you again.
Usually, you could keep your cool, when it didn’t involve your boyfriend, but this was the last straw. “Listen here, I do not care how you feel about Bruce or anything of the sort, but I do know this; you are under my care, and you will be polite, respectful, and cut that language out when I am around.”
“Or what?”
You smiled smugly, stepping closer to Dick as you told him exactly what would happen if he did not behave.  
The children had come home happy, Dick noticeably more so than when he left that morning, and they all boasted about the fun they had with you. Bruce found himself excited at just how well they got on with you, and surprised when the seven of you seemed to be in cahoots. This suspicion rose when he asked you about what the kids bought, but you only brushed him off—heading upstairs in a hurry as you giggled along with the little ones. Fortunately for you, Bruce didn’t dwell much on the thought as his attentions were pulled toward making the evening perfect. 
And so had the party gone. It was starting perfectly. The guests were happy, dinner was being served on time, and, most importantly, the money was rolling in for the charities. Bruce stood in the doorway of the foyer and salon, where the guests were because Alfred had informed him that you needed something. Harvey, who had been in the middle of telling him something, followed him. 
To his surprise, you were standing on the last landing of the staircase in a classy red dress, and he would be lying to himself as well as you if he didn’t admit that you looked stunning. Proudly looking down at him, you grinned before turning to see the kids, all dressed up, behind you. 
“Who is that,” Harvey mumbled to Bruce, grinning from ear to ear. 
Bruce answered, “My nanny.” When you approached, he said in a hushed tone, “I told you the children couldn’t attend.”
You acted shocked, hand going to your cheek, and said sarcastically, “Oh, my! I must be blushing.”
“You’re a dirty player,” He commented before going to his children. Bruce admired how well they all cleaned up, doting on them like he always did, before telling them to be on their most perfect behavior. 
Harvey took this chance to introduce himself, and you seemed charmed. “Pleasure to meet you, Mr. DA. Say, I’ve got some parking tickets that I think are pretty bogus, you think you fix those for…”
You trailed off when Bruce came back up to you, motioning all of you toward the salon, and whispering in your ear, “We’re discussing this later.”
You rolled your eyes, you would rather have fun than stress what your boss would say. The children were a hit amongst the party-goers, all of them cooing and awing at the children. You, too, were an intrigue to the guests since you were the mysterious latercomer who also happened to be beautiful. Bruce was surprised by just how well, with your downtown Gotham charms, you ran in the circles of the rich. You enthralled them with little tales of the children, some he was sure you made up, as well as wise outlooks on life (according to yourself, but the people listening took it up like catnip). 
Bruce also found himself having the time of his life with his kids, joking with them, and sharing the bits of business to the best of his ability. Dick was happy that he was paying more attention to them rather than the party, even going as far as to call him ‘Dad’ rather than Bruce. And, when you had left to put Damian to bed, Dickie had told him to keep you around along with something about wanting to keep his social life intact another day. 
That certainly would be something else he would need to speak to you about. 
“Goodbye, Harvey! I’ll call you about those parking tickets,” You called out the front door as you put the small piece of paper with his number into your bra. When you turned around there was Bruce, standing there with his hands on his hips, and you thought for sure you were going to get sacked. 
Before you could explain, Bruce said, “Don’t pull a stunt like that again.”
You were shocked, but not undeterred from your original task. “All I want to do is show those kids that you care about them.”
“I do care about them, and don’t need you to show that.”
You stepped forward, snickering. “I seriously doubt that. I mean, look how happy they were tonight. Why would you want to exclude them like that, Mr. Wayne?”
Bruce thinned his lips, thinking for a moment before relenting. He wasn’t sure if it was the fact that you were right or that he found the courageous glint in your eyes fairly pretty that he gave up so easily. Reluctantly, he agreed that maybe you were right and mentioned how much the kids liked you, even going as far as to offhandedly mention what Dick said. 
“You can stay,” He said. 
You grinned, “Good. I think you’d have a hard time getting rid of me now. I think the masses in this house might revolt.”
Bruce looked at you again before smiling. No matter how he felt, Bruce couldn’t deny one thing; That you were the perfect addition to the household.
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