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#and as if i won't have problems 1 week from now
tsuntsunfangirl · 11 months
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@elen-aranel
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LoWho: *is busy filing data and reports in the office in between client meetings, allowing her evil queue to just crank out the Anson Mount NSFW photos as if she has no care in the world*
Post in question.
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blackpearlblast · 5 months
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a rundown on the listed e-sim platforms from this tweet from mirna el helbawi. visit esimsforgaza to learn about this effort. (they also have a tutorial on how to purchase an esim and send it to them)
update v10 (4/9/24) nomad (regional middle east), holafly (israel and egypt), simly (palestine and middle east), and airalo (discover) are currently in the highest in demand. platforms. if it has been more than 3 weeks since you initially sent your esim and your esim has not been activated, you can reforward your original email with the expiration date in the subject line. you can see gothhabiba’s guide for how to tell if your esims have been activated. if your esim has expired without use, you can contact customer service to renew or replace it.
troubleshooting hint 1: if you are trying to pay through paypal, make sure you have pop-ups enabled! otherwise the payment window won't be able to appear. (this issue most frequently seems to occur with nomad)
troubleshooting hint 2: if you are trying to purchase an esim using the provider's app, it may block you from purchasing if your phone does not fit the requirements to install and use their esims. use their website in your browser instead and this problem should go away.
nomad
you can use a referral code to get $3 off your first purchase and also make it so the person whose code you used can buy more esims for gaza. many people have been leaving their referral codes in the replies of this post and supposedly a referral code may eventually reach capacity so just keep trying until you find one that works! BACKPACKNOMAD is another code to get $3 off your first purchase, it's been working for some people but not others so try out a referral code instead if you can't get it to work. NOMADCNG is a code for 5% off any middle east region nomad esims posted by connecting gaza. it can be used on any purchase, not just your first but is generally going to give less off than the first-purchase only codes, so use those first. it can be used in combination with nomad points. (nomad promo codes do not work on plans that are already on sale, unlimited plans, and plans under $5)
weekly tuesdays only code on nomad web, PST timezone! it gives 10% off plans 10gb and above. NOMADTUE
nomad also seems to be kind of sluggish sometimes when it comes to sending out emails with the codes. you can look for them manually by going to manage -> manage plans -> the plan you purchased -> installation instruction and scroll down to install esim via QR code or manual input then select QR code to find the QR code which you can screenshot and email to them. often just the act of logging back into your nomad account after purchase seems to cause the email with the code to come through though.
mogo
mogo's website is fucking annoying to navigate and i couldn't find any promo codes, but their prices are massively on sale anyway. you have to pick if you want your esim to be for iphone, ipad, or android for some reason. according to statcounter, android makes up approx. 75% of mobile markets in palestine while iphone represents approx. 25%. so i would probably recommend prioritizing donations of android esims but if you can afford multiple, try buying an iphone one too? if i can find any official direction from the connecting gaza crew on this i will update with it.
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a good referral code to use for mogo is 8R29F9. the way things are worded are confusing but as far as i can tell, if you use it we both get a 10% discount on your first purchase. (the referrer gets a 10% voucher that allows them to top up in use esims, they are someone who i know has bought a lot of esims and will be able to make good use of the top-up discount vouchers!) also upon signing up it automatically generates a password for you which you can change by downloading the app. (check your email to find your account's current password)
holafly (also looking for holafly esims for egypt now)
holafly is pricier than the others and the only promo code i could find was ESIMNOW for 7% off. someone in the tags mentioned GETESIM7 as another 7% off code they had received, so if you have already used ESIMNOW or can't seem to get it to work, try GETESIM7. referral codes only seem to give 5% off and they don't stack. (i don't remember the source, it was on some sketchy coupon site i don't want to link to and only can recommend because i tried it myself) you can also use my referral link for 5% off if you can afford the 2% worse deal on your end, it will give me $5 credit which i can put towards buying more esims. connecting gaza has also posted the promo code HOLACNG for 5% off but since it is less than the 7% off codes and as far as i can tell does not give credit towards others to buy esims like the referral links, i would consider it lower priority for use.
simly (note: simly must be downloaded as an app to be used, the website link is to help people confirm they are downloading the right app)
i have not personally used simly so i am going to be going off of the sixth slide of mirna el helbawi's instagram guide, with some corrections from someone who has successfully purchased an esim from simly. after downloading the app and making an account, search for palestine or middle east and purchase your preferred package. the page the app takes you to after your purchase should have the QR code to send to the esimsforgaza email, it won't show up in your email receipt. someone kindly left her referral code in the tags of this post, it gives $3 off your first purchase and will give her $3 credit to put towards purchasing more esims for gaza. the code is CIWA2. (if this referral code doesn't work, try one from the notes of this post!) according to someone in the notes, ARB is a simly promo code for 25% off esims that is still working as of march 3rd.
airalo
some people have noted issues trying to sign up for airalo using the browser version of the website, it worked for me but if you are struggling you can give the mobile app a try and that should work. you can use a referral code to get $3 off your first purchase and give the code suppler a $3 credit for buying more esims. KARINA9661 is a code sourced from this post which is also a wonderful example of how using people's referral codes can really make a difference. if for some reason that referral code isn't working, you can find more in the notes of the original esim post i made here.
@/fairuzfan also has a tag of esim referral codes for various platforms!
(note: mogo and holafly both link to israel esims as there are no general regional packages for the middle east like on nomad and the esims for gaza website specifically linked to the israel package on mogo, so i linked to the equivalent on holafly.)
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tkbrokkoli · 11 months
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aaaaaahhhh guys!!!
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wineauntie · 2 months
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IT ISN’T THE END OF THE WORLD— q.hughes x hughes sister!reader
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summary: three times that Quinn comforted you and one of the times you returned the favour.
notes: big brother Quinn is my Roman Empire, I can’t lie! You are five years younger than Quinn.
warnings: literally the fluffiest of fluffs, use of y/n and y/n/n, fem!reader.
word count: 3.5k+
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1. being left out – aged six and eleven
You sat on the grass outside of your home, your knees tucked into your chest as tears dripped down your face. Ahead of you, Jack and Luke were skating around in rollerblades with a singular net set up on the tarmac as they played a game of hockey. You'd tried to join them, even going as far as strapping up your purple rollerskates but when you'd asked your two older brothers to join them, they'd outright told you that you weren't allowed.
"Y/n/n, this is boys only game," Jack had explained, half lifting you towards the grass and away from the road. "You can't play!"
"Yeah, you can't play," Luke piped up, fidgeting with his stick, his curls peeking out from beneath his helmet.
"But-" You'd tried to wiggle out of Jack's grasp as you reached the grass.
"Stay on the grass," Jack had urged, patting your head before he skated back towards Luke.
Your bottom lip trembled as you collapsed onto the grass beneath you, being forced to watch rather than partake. You couldn't understand why you couldn't just play with them. And as you cried, neither of the two boys noticed your tears or your splotchy face.
"Mom said dinner will be ready in an hour!"
Quinn's voice called out from the front door, in shock, you turned just in time for him to glance towards you. His face fell at the sight of your miserable eyes and he quickly shut the front door before making his way towards you.
"What's wrong?" His worried voice caused your lower lip to tremble once more. Even at eleven years old, Quinn was your protector. He was the one you ran to with every small problem, the one who'd sit you down and explain things and the one who you secretly favoured the most.
You cast a look over to Luke and Jack who continued their game, before you dropped your head between your knees. Quinn sighed and carefully sat beside you, his legs stretching out far beyond your own.
"What's wrong, y/n/n?"
That was what made you burst into tears again. A very startled Quinn rapidly put his arm around you, hugging you into his side. Your tears began to stain his shirt as he awkwardly patted your head.
"Jack and Luke won't let me play!" You wailed, as a small scowl crossed Quinn's face. "They said I have to stay here...I hate here!"
"C'mon now," Quinn tried to calm you. "We don't need to play with those two stupids." You let out a sniffly laugh as you rested against his shoulder.
"Mom said you can't call them stupid anymore," you croaked out, and now it was Quinn's turn to laugh.
"I know but I'll tell you a secret–they are!"
You smiled and looked towards your two brothers who were now fighting, pushing one another back and forth.
"How about you and me go in and have a tea party?" He suggested, scrunching his nose up as he watched Jack and Luke battle it out. "We can even dress up?" You jumped to your feet excitedly, dragging Quinn up with you.
"Please!" You giggled, pulling Quinn towards the house, your tears long forgotten. "I have a tiara for you!" Quinn painted an excited expression across his face, but very real happiness spread through his body at the sight of your joy.
2. the nightmares – aged eight and thirteen
You shot awake with a startled gasp, your small hands clutching your childhood teddy. You'd been getting nightmares for weeks yet you couldn't pinpoint where they'd begun— in reality, Jack had told you countless ghost stories about a small evil ghost lurking in your room, and you seemed to have taken that story to heart.
Tears welled in your eyes as you glanced around your room in terror, the light of a pink wall flower illuminated the majority of the room...yet the shadows that lingered left your body shaking. The horrors from your nightmares, which couldn't be remembered, haunted you and the thought of going back to sleep was virtually impossible.
Your bottom lip trembled as you clutched your teddy to your chest, and jumped out of the bed towards the hallway, not daring to look behind you. The light from the bathroom down the hall illuminated the darkness, as you stood dead centre with your head tilted slightly.
You didn't know where to go.
You'd already run to your mom and dad multiple times during the night and your little self felt rather guilty. You knew they needed their sleep– everyone did.
You stifled a whimper, your tears dripping down your face as you glanced down the hall, noticing a door slightly open. Without another thought, you rushed down the hall, your bare feet slapping against the wooden flooring as you entered the open door.
You slipped into the dark room, your teddy close to your chest as you approached the lump beneath the covers on the bed by the window. Soft snores echoed through the room as you crept towards the bed as quietly as possible. Your tears were still falling, as you sniffled and carefully tapped the lump's shoulder.
You watched as he stirred, and then a familiar voice broke through the darkness, "What time is it?" The voice was groggy with sleep, but the concern was evident.
"I had a nightmare again, Q," you whispered with bleary eyes, your voice trembling with pure fear and exhaustion. "I can't sleep. I'm sorry..."
Quinn sat up, rubbing his eyes before reaching out to pull you into a comforting embrace. "Shh, it's okay. C'mere," he yawned while reassuring you, his arms enveloping you in warmth and security. He lifted you onto the bed, his half-lidded eyes glancing towards his digital clock that blinked the time 3:45 am.
You buried your face into his chest, clinging to him as if he were your lifeline. His steady heartbeat beneath your ear offered a soothing rhythm, calming your racing thoughts.
"Want me to go tell Mom?" He asked, earning him a rapid shake of the head from you.
"Okay...do you want to stay here?" Quinn hesitantly offered with as soft of a voice as he could muster so early in the morning. He pulled you away from his ever so slightly so that he could look down at you. With a half-nod, you cuddled closer to him, letting him drape half of his blanket over your body.
"Just don't hog the covers," he grumbled, lying back down on the bed, his head burying itself in his pillow. "And don't wake up early."
You smiled and melted into the comfort of Quinn's bed, your head on the edge of the pillow you were being forced to share. The feeling of the weight of exhaustion finally pulled you under and as you drifted off to sleep, the nightmares seemed to fade away, replaced by the comforting presence of your older brother by your side.
The next morning, your mom had woken up, ready to bring you to practice, only to find your bed empty. A flare of panic shot through her body, all those horror stories of child abduction running through her mind as she exited the room with pursed lips.
Ellen peered into Luke's room first, her head sticking around the wooden frame. For a mere second, she allowed herself to stifle a smile at the sight of Luke sprawled across the bed like a starfish, his covers abandoned on the floor as soft breath escaped his mouth. She nodded slowly and closed the door before checking the room beside his.
Jack's room was messy. That was the first thing she noticed. Clothes were strewn across any furniture left in sight, with muddy shoes thrown into the corner. Ellen covered her mouth to stop herself from laughing at the sight of Jack sleeping. Jack, like Luke, was sprawled across his bed, only instead of actually being on the bed– Jack was hanging half off of it. His head was almost touching the rug on his floor — his toes the same. His head was thrown back with snores periodically escaping his mouth.
She shook her head lightly before closing the door quietly and moving towards the last bedroom in the hall. Quinn's door was ajar, allowing Ellen to silently slip in. She paused in her steps at the sight ahead of her. You curled up around Quinn, your teddy snug between you two, as his arm wrapped around your head protectively. The two of you were fast asleep, oblivious to the utter relief Ellen was feeling.
She watched the two of you for a few seconds before taking a quick picture and sending it to Jim with a soft smile. Ellen looked down at you two once more and fixed the cover over the both of you. She backed away slowly and slipped out of the room leaving the two of you to sleep in for the day.
3. sickness – aged 10 and fifteen
"Are you sure you'll be okay looking after her?"
Ellen grabbed a bag from the floor beside the couch Quinn sat on, a bowl of cereal in his hands as he watched a game. You had fallen sick two days prior due to the flu and were currently bed-bound. Your dad was out of state, and your mom had to take Luke and Jack to a hockey match in the next town over.
"Yeah, Mom, don't worry," Quinn answered through muffled words as he swallowed a spoonful of food. "I can take care of her for a few hours, it'll be fine."
Ellen bit her lip in worry glancing towards the stairs before ruffling Quinn's hair. "Don't start a fire or kill either yourself or y/n," she instructed, "she might wake up soon and might want food, only give her toast and water or she'll throw it all up."
"Mom, I got it," Quinn reassured her, standing up and gathering Luke's hockey bag in his arms. "I'll help you bring these out."
Your mom had left ten minutes after with Jack and Luke, leaving Quinn in charge of the house. You had woken up to the sound of Luke yelling and the door slamming behind him. Your throat felt raw from the amount of coughing you were doing combined with the fact you could only breathe from your mouth as your nose was blocked up.
You groaned into your pillow, your clammy hands clutching your uneasy stomach as you buried yourself beneath your covers. Quinn cautiously peeked into your room at the noise of you moving around, his eyes wide and careful as they landed on your paled face and shaking body.
Quinn hesitated for a moment, unsure of what to do. He had never been in charge of taking care of you while you were sick before. But seeing you there, looking so vulnerable and unwell, he knew he had to step up.
Taking a deep breath, Quinn quietly approached your bed, trying not to startle you. "Hey, it's just me," he said softly, his voice filled with concern. "How are you feeling?"
You managed to croak out a weak response, your voice barely audible. Quinn frowned and his eyebrows furrowed upon seeing how much you were struggling. Without another word, he hurried downstairs to grab a glass of water and a slice of bread for toast, just as your mom had instructed.
Returning to your room, Quinn carefully placed the items on your bedside table, as he helped you sit up, propping pillows behind your back for support. You moaned in discontent at the feeling of sickness that continued to roll through your body as he handed you the glass of water and a piece of toast.
"Drink slowly," he spoke carefully, watching anxiously as you took small sips and nibbled on the food. "You don't feel like getting sick, do you?!"
You shook your head weakly, placing the leftover crusts on your plate. You felt a tickle grow in your throat as another cough wracked through your body. Quinn jumped into action, running your back as he'd seen Mom do countlessly over the past two days. His warm hand lent you comfort as your body contorted.
Once the coughing subsided, you leaned back against the pillows, feeling exhausted but a little better with Quinn by your side. He stayed with you, chatting softly and making sure you were comfortable until you drifted off to sleep again, knowing that you were in good hands.
As you rested, Quinn kept a watchful eye on you, ready to spring into action at any sign of distress. Halfway through your unrestful nap, your body shook violently, yet your forehead was beaded with sweat. Quinn gulped in worry as he covered you with a blanket and wiped your forehead with a cool cloth.
He hated seeing you like this, it made him want to kick whoever had passed the sickness onto you.
Throughout the day, Quinn checked in on you regularly, making sure you were comfortable and had everything you needed. He even brought up some of your favourite books and movies to help pass the time when you woke, staying by your side until you drifted off to sleep again.
When your mom finally returned home with Jack and Luke– both elated from their win, she was relieved to find you resting peacefully, thanks to Quinn's attentive care.
"You did well, Quinn," Your mom smiled, pressing a kiss to his forehead as he scrunched up his nose. "Thank you."
Quinn simply shrugged it off as he looked towards your sleeping figure. Despite his nonchalant expression, deep down, he felt a sense of pride erupt inside of him knowing that he had been there for you when you needed him most.
"Let's hope you don't get sick now," Ellen hummed, brushing a hand through his hair. Quinn pushed a smile onto his face, getting sick would be worth it as long as you were better.
4. moving away – aged 16 and 20
The morning sunlight filtered through the curtains, casting a warm glow into Quinn's room, illuminating the chaos of packing strewn across the floor. Hockey jerseys, equipment, and mementoes from his years of playing for the local team adorned his walls, each item holding memories of victories, defeats, and the camaraderie of teammates. But today, there was a sense of bittersweetness in the air, a mixture of excitement and sadness, as Quinn prepared to completely leave Michigan behind and embark on a new chapter of his life in Vancouver. He had been offered the opportunity to play for the Vancouver Canucks, a dream come true for any aspiring hockey player. But with it came the prospect of leaving behind everything he had ever known – our family, our home, our tight-knit community.
You sat on the edge of his bed, watching him carefully fold his clothes, a furrow of worry etched on his brow. "Are you okay, Quinn?" you asked softly, reaching out to place a comforting hand on his shoulder.
He sighed, setting down the hoodie he was folding and meeting your gaze with a mix of apprehension and sadness in his eyes. "I don't know," he eventually admitted, his voice tinged with uncertainty. He ran a hand through his tousled hair. "I mean, Vancouver is such an incredible opportunity, but... I'm going to miss everyone and don't you dare tell that to the idiots out back."
You let a small smile grace your face at the thought of Jack and Luke catching wind of Quinn's unease. You found yourself nodding understandingly, feeling a pang of sadness yourself at the thought of Quinn leaving. He was not only your older brother but also one of your best friends, someone you had always looked up to and relied on for guidance and support. The idea of him being thousands of miles away was daunting, to say the least.
Even when he was in college he was only one measly phone call away and then another forty-minute drive. He was never thousands of miles away in a different country.
You nodded sympathetically, understanding the weight of his dilemma. Quinn had always been fiercely devoted to our family and friends, and the thought of leaving them behind was undoubtedly terrifying. But deep down, You knew he couldn't let this opportunity slip away – not when it was his chance to shine on the ice and pursue his passion for hockey at the highest level.
"Quinn, listen to me," I said, stepping closer to him and placing a reassuring hand on his arm. "I know it's scary to leave, but this is your dream we're talking about. You've worked so hard for this moment, and you can't let fear hold you back."
"You'll do great, Quinn," you continued to reassure him, with a cracked smile. "And we'll still be here for you, no matter how far away you are. Plus, Vancouver should be nice, and I've only been there twice, maybe I can visit with Mom and Dad?"
Quinn managed a small smile at your words, though you could tell the worry still lingered in his eyes. "I know," he said softly. "But it won't be the same without having you all there with me." He looked at you, his eyes searching yours for reassurance. "I don't want to leave you all behind."
I smiled softly, feeling a swell of pride for my big brother. "We'll be okay, Quinn. Mom and Dad are proud of you, and so are Luke, Jack, and I. Hell, before you know it, Jack might be up there playing with you, who knows!"
A sense of calm washed over Quinn as your words sank in, his tense shoulders relaxing ever so slightly. He knew that no matter where his hockey career took him, your family would always be his anchor, his support system through thick and thin. You scooted closer to him, wrapping your arms around him in a tight hug.
"We'll always be here for you, Quinn," you whispered, feeling the weight of the impending separation settling over you both. "And we'll be cheering you no matter where you are, no matter what happens, every step of the way."
You sat there in silence for a moment, clinging to each other as if afraid to let go. But eventually, Quinn pulled away, a determined look in his eyes as he resumed packing his belongings.
"You're right," he sighed, his voice steady with newfound resolve.
"As always," you beamed with a laugh, as Quinn elbowed you playfully. You bowed your head glancing at Quinn briefly. "I'm gonna miss you, y'know?"
"I know," he hummed, "but like you said, you can come visit whenever you want and you can call or text me whenever you need to." You nodded silently, swallowing the lump in your throat.
You smiled, feeling a surge of pride welling up inside you. Your brother may be leaving Michigan behind, but you knew that he was destined for great things in Vancouver. And no matter where life took you, you would always be there for each other, bound by the unbreakable bond of family.
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actual-lea · 5 months
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So who wants to hear about the stupid stupid way I'm playing Baldur's Gate 3?
I made it to Act 3 on my first (original character) playthrough like a week before Patch 5 came out, and after finding it absolutely unplayable (on the PS5) decided it was time to go ahead and start an origin character run for the funsies while waiting on the new patch to fix the Lag Hell. Naturally, I picked Gale. Since this was mostly just for fun/to hold me over until I could continue my other file, I decided it would be a nice time to see what happens if you just refuse to consume any magic items. Of course, if you are not playing as Gale and ignore his Orb Problem, he will apparently eventually leave your party, but what if you ARE Gale? I couldn't find an answer with a minimal amount of Googling SO
There are three stages to his Arcane Hunger, each of which give you increasingly debilitating debuffs: Arcane Hunger, Greater Arcane Hunger, and Severe Arcane Hunger. It seems the triggers for progressing to the next stage are the same as the triggers where he would start needing an item in my other file (i.e. that bridge next to the Blighted Village, entering the temple at the Goblin Camp, the Hag's Lair, etc.) which obviously makes sense. I figure with the amount of contingencies in this game for incredibly specific situations, surely there is some kind of unique dialog or fun cutscene that will play if I ignore the Arcane Hunger long enough and just play through the debuffs.
I played Act 1 completely normally, doing a lil quicksave every time I was about to Long Rest just in case the game gave me a cutscene of the big explosion upon waking up (I thought maybe it would be time-based, similar to the game over you get if Gale dies and you leave him for 3 days (? I think?) which does not seem to be the case). I made it through basically everything without anything odd happening besides the aforementioned debuffs. The Severe Arcane Hunger is where things get really sloggy, because Gale can only move at half speed.
I have been slowly trudging EVERYWHERE since the Goblin Camp.
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I eventually started going out of my way to make sure I hit all the Arcane Hunger triggers I know about, to see what would happen, and the answer is nothing, aside from Gale occasionally reminding me that he's wracked with terrible pain.
So, surely, the game will certainly not let me into the Mountain Pass without SOMETHING happening, right?
WELL
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That's surprising, but whatever, at least now I have the chance to see what happens if you go meet Elminster without having consumed any magic items,
Except
He wasn't there.
I went to the area in the Mountain Pass where the cutscene is supposed to start, and it just. Didn't happen. Nothing happened. I could walk right up to the entrance to the next area.
But SURELY, the game won't let me into the gotdamn Shadow-Cursed Lands without saying SOMETHING about the fact that the orb has been starving for several weeks at this point, right? The game isn't going to let me into Act Freaking 2 without at the very least giving me a game over to tell me I'm not allowed to do this and make me reload and actually feed this poor starving wizard, right?
RIGHT?
WELL
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WELL
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Here we are. I'm at the Last Light Inn, I'm at the Taco Bell, I'm at the combination Last Light Inn Taco Bell with a bag full of delicious Cheesy Gordita Magic Boots that I refuse to eat.
SO LIKE. How far does this go??? Am I gonna be able to infiltrate Moonrise Towers without ever speaking to Elminster? Am I gonna trudge all the way to Ketheric at half freaking speed and fight him with Disadvantage on everything?? Am I gonna make it all the way to goddang Baldur's Gate with a Netherese orb that is long overdue to explode???
Like I said, I did not find an answer on what happens if you do this on a Gale Origin playthrough, and at this point, I don't even want to, I just want to see how far I can take this.
I already know I'll have to do another normal Gale playthrough where I actually FEED HIM after this, because I'm sure I've missed out on a ton of dialogue and whatnot, especially from Tara who only ever has this to say when I speak with her in camp:
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I am genuinely beginning to wonder if there is actually nothing in place to stop me from doing this. I am wondering what the dialogue options will look like when I get to the "Heart of the Absolute" where Gale would ordinarily want to blow himself up, if Elminster had ever shown up to tell him to do so. Maybe the devs just didn't bother, and figured that no one would be stupid and stubborn enough to play through the whole dang thing while so severely debuffed.
Joke's on them, Disadvantage means NOTHING to Magic Missile Machine Gale Dekarios.
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deonsx · 4 months
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If They Become A Girl Dad
Feat: Dazai, Chuuya, Fyodor, Nikolai, Atsushi, Akutagawa
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Dazai Osamu
God! I can imagine him in complete joy. Being the father of a girl made him much more exciting than being the father of a boy. The reason is that he always wants to protect his little princess. Father and daughter dress the same and often go shopping for his daughter
He will definitely spoil your daughter and if you try to stop him, you will be the bad cop.. He will be the one who gets her ready for school in the morning, while you will prepare her bag. While braiding your daughter's hair, you laugh when you realize how complex Dazai's mind is, "Honey! Braiding hair, I need help with this!" "Yes, mom and dad can't do it, my hair is tangled, please" While your daughter is complaining about her father, poor dazai is only trying to communicate with him more
"My beautiful daughters, I am lucky to have you... I have a duty to protect you”
Chuuya Nakahara
He shows off his Cooking skills to your daughter and manages to impress your daughter every time. He is a hero in your daughter's eyes, but the problem is that your daughter...is in love with your husband much more than you. "Dad, I love you more than my mother~!" Chuuya laughs and looks at you, "Look, your mother says she loves me more, even though~" Your boyfriend kisses his daughter as if he's teasing you
he takes your daughter out on trips all the time, and to be honest, he is a real trick when it comes to mothering her. he can take care of your child for hours, days, weeks, even when you are not around and working overtime at work. He will try to entertain her with his powers. I can imagine him rocking your daughter to sleep on his lap. He buys your daughter clothes from the most expensive brands and dresses her like Barbie. Your daughter and Chuu look so much alike that there would never even be a possibility of suspicion
“You can't understand how it feels to have two angels belong to me”
Fyodor Dostoyevski
He is definitely a difficult person and the fact that he now has a daughter really makes him a more difficult father figure. His daughter is a complete copy of him, her hair and eyes are purple, I know that Fyodor will not be a very careless father, on the contrary, he really cares about her very much, mostly the fact that he does not have time to care does not make him a careless father. He always has his eyes on his daughter and is busy protecting her.
If you leave them alone, it is possible, although very rare, to witness them playing games with their daughter. Usually, they play the Barbie house game together as a result of her daughter's insistence. Fyodor agrees not to talk because instead of these games, he prefers to teach her new hobbies such as chess, piano and violin. He is a very disciplined father, he is still with his daughter during her high school years. he stays (to keep her away from men) he's a jealous father he just can't say it
"I'm the only man in your life, your father, you won't need anyone else"
Nikolai Gogol
He is a total entertainer, he does his best to entertain his daughter. Your daughter has long white hair and deep blue eyes, a snow-white skin, and it is certain that she inherited all her genes from Nikolay. She starts braiding your daughter's hair at the very beginning of the morning and they spend hours together. Even your daughter's first word is "pa~pa!~" You and Nikolai looked at each other and were shocked. "My dear girl!!!!~~" Your lover is capable of being both a mother and a father to him and you didn't realize this until you had a child
Your child loves to do magic tricks! You don't have to wake up at night because Nikolai gives your child all the sleep back in 1 minute with his talent, you don't even have to get out of bed, he always dresses his daughter like a royal princess when shopping for clothes, he buys the most expensive jewels (even though she is still small, she has a lot of diamonds), her daughter's taste attracted her father and They eat their favorite meals together. Whatever her father wants to eat, she wants it too
"You're not jealous of us spending so much time with my daughter, are you? Remember...I'm yours."
Atsushi Nakajima
He is a really worried father, sometimes he even forgets that he is a father and becomes a child, it is possible that you will feel like you have 2 children because you cannot get out of this cycle in the general period of time... Atsushi really likes to introduce everything to your daughter, he takes her to the agency on the days when you are busy and tired. It mostly saves you from a tiring day. He spends all his time with her in the mornings and your daughter doesn't look like you, she is a complete copy of her father, her eyes are a mixture of sain and purple, she reminds of autumn, her hair shifts from white to blonde and her naughty mistakes are the same as her father's.
He is always protecting you and your daughter. Now he has 2 lives to protect. He cried the first time when he learned that your baby would be a girl. I can imagine him kneeling down on his knees and crying with happiness, thinking about what kind of a daughter he will be. "I-I will be a father! And the father of a girl!!" There was a huge celebration when he shouted this news to the agency, "My father is a tiger!" Your daughter was constantly bragging about her father and trying to convince her friends that he was a tiger
"Oh, did my darling daughter and wife miss me? Because I missed them”
Akutagawa Ryunosuke
He is a father who really has a hard time showing his emotions, but when it comes to his daughter, everything disappears for him. If you see him talking to his daughter, you will feel like you don't know him at all. He likes to play with your little daughter and teach her new words. His first word is "rasomon" He entertains your daughter by showing her his talent. rasomon is at your daughter's disposal. They go on shopping trips with his father but of course his father can't take care of him alone, so he can't help but call you. "I think I still have a lot to learn from you, s/o" Unlike other fathers, Akutagawa is uneasy and is still trying to overcome his inferiority complex left over from Dazai. Of course, everything is better with you painted too white
Even though he had a hard time expressing his feelings when he found out you were going to have a daughter, he gave you a reassuring smile and held your hand "I'm with you" he always reassured you and as you now rocked your daughter in his arms these memories ran through your mind, Akutagawa definitely described his child about Dazai, your daughter strangely doesn't like dazai
"You're the one who helped me erase the darkness in my heart... don't leave me s/o..."
Enjoy!
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bossbtch1 · 5 months
Note
Hi there 🫶🏻
I read Shadow of the past and it was awesome oh my god!!!
If you are taking requests, I have actually two prompts that I would love to see it, written by you 🥹
1- just a smut, pure smut, lovely smut. Bucky being an angry dom, frustrated coming to home and giving his frustration on female reader
and he's to obsessed and rough that reader need to you safe word, and then its a bit angst, cause Bucky feels terrible, but fem Reader reassures him that everything is okay 🥰
2th prompt in next ask 👁️
A Bad Day
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Summary : Basically "you pissed me out, I'm going to fuck the shit out of you."
Pairings : Bucky x F!Reader
Words : 5,7k
General Tags : NSFW, Smut, 18+
Tags : Angst, Hurt, Comfort, P in V, Unprotected Sex, Safe Word, Bucky is a dom, Choking, Spanking, Angry sex, After care, Make up sex, Shower sex, Slight Handjob, Fingering, Playful Banter, Fluff at the end
A/N : Hi, thank you for the request. While this still leans into the smutty side, I've woven in some plot and fluff to enhance the overall experience. Enjoy!
My masterlist
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It was one of those days. When you could tell Bucky was stressed about something, but wouldn't tell you what it was. You knew not to push him, but you wished he'd talk to you instead of keeping it bottled up.
You were sitting at home watching a show on Netflix, while you waited for him to get back. It was almost 10 o'clock. You'd made dinner earlier, but since he hadn't eaten it yet, you had put the plate of food in the microwave. It was probably cold by now, but you were sure he was hungry and would eat it anyway.
It had been days since he talked to you. You missed his voice and his touch. But the way he had been treating you lately was making you angry. You knew he was stressed and needed to be left alone, but you needed attention too. You couldn't remember the last time he'd kissed you. The last time he'd told you he loved you.
When you heard the front door open and shut, you stood from the couch and walked to the kitchen. He was just taking his coat off.
"Welcome home," you greeted, leaning against the counter.
"Hey," he mumbled, hanging his coat up and walking past you to the microwave. He grabbed the plate of food and pulled it out, before grabbing a fork. "Thank you for dinner."
"You're welcome." You watched as he sat down at the table and started eating. "Are you okay?"
Pausing mid-bite, he raised an eyebrow and met your gaze. "Why do you ask?"
"I was just wondering. You've been a little distant lately," you mentioned, making your way over to the table and taking a seat across from him.
"I'm fine," he replied, before shoving another forkful into his mouth.
"Are you sure? Because you've been acting differently," you pointed out, as you looked at him, studying his expressions.
He put his fork down and let out a deep breath. "Look, I'm not really in the mood for this. Can we just drop it?"
"Drop what? I'm worried about you," you expressed, leaning in slightly.
"I'm fine," he said with a hint of irritation in his tone. "I don't want to talk about it."
A moment of silence hung between you two as you looked at him. "Do you want to talk about us? About how you've barely talked to me for the past week? Or about how I haven't gotten so much as a kiss or an 'I love you' from you?” You paused, your words lingering in the space between you. "Is that something you'd like to talk about?"
"Jesus Christ, what's your problem?" he asked, running his fingers through his hair in frustration.
"I don't have a problem. I just miss my boyfriend," you said, trying to keep the hurt from your voice. "I don't even know what's going on with you anymore. You won't tell me. It's like I don't matter to you."
"I said I don't want to talk about it," he muttered.
"Well, I want to," you shot back, crossing your arms.
"What do you want me to say? That I'm stressed? That I don't have time for anything other than work right now?” He looked at you with frustration. “Do you want me to admit that I'm a fucking failure? That I'm a piece of shit for not being able to give you the life you deserve?"
You blinked at him, stunned at his action. "Bucky-"
"Don't," he snapped, standing up. His fork clattered as it hit the table, the sound echoing through the apartment. "Don't give me the sad eyes."
"I'm not-"
"Yes, you are! You're pitying me," he yelled, the frustration in his voice escalating. "Why don't you just step away so I can have some damn peace during my dinner?" His outburst echoed in the space.
"Fine," you declared, rising from your seat. "If that's how you want to be, then I'll leave you alone."
"Fine." He crossed his arms defiantly as you walked past him, heading toward the bedroom.
You slammed the door behind you and flopped down on the bed. You felt tears welling up in your eyes and you tried not to cry. You were pissed off at him.  You started scrolling through your Instagram feed, hoping to take your mind off of Bucky and whatever he was going through. You'd never seen him act like this before. Normally he would vent to you or you would talk him through it. He'd never completely shut you out before.
After a few minutes, you heard the microwave again. Bucky was heating up more food. You continued looking through your phone, until you heard him walk into the bedroom. You locked your phone and set it down, sitting up. You were expecting him to start undressing and getting ready for bed, but instead he walked over to you and grabbed you by the arm.
"Buck," you exclaimed, surprised by his actions. "What are you doing?"
"You want me to act like myself?" he asked, his hand tightening around your arm. "You want me to talk to you and be affectionate?"
"Yes," you answered, not knowing where this was going.
With an abrupt pull, he brought you to your feet. "Well, this is how I'm going to treat you."
Before you could ask what he meant, he threw you down onto the bed, causing you to let out a squeal. "Buck, what the hell?"
He didn’t answer and got on top of you. His hands held your wrists against the bed and he leaned in to kiss you. The kiss was hard and demanding. He forced his tongue into your mouth and began exploring.
When he finally pulled away, he looked into your eyes. "Bucky... we can talk about this..."
"No, Y/N. I want to fuck. I want to take my anger out on you. Will you let me do that? Will you let me fuck you like an animal?" he asked. He had never been this rough. But you couldn't deny how aroused it made you. You could feel your panties getting wet. “I’ll show you the real me.”
"Yes," you breathed out and braced yourself.
He grabbed your wrists and pinned them down above your head. His body was hovering over yours. "I'll give you a safe word. How about 'peach'? Say it and I'll stop."
"Peach?" you questioned.
"Say the word and I'll stop," he repeated, before crashing his lips onto yours.
The kiss was sloppy and harsh. He bit your bottom lip hard, pulling a cry from your lips. It felt like he was trying to suck the breath out of you. You felt out of breath when he finally pulled away. He moved his hands away from your wrists, but you kept them in place.
He brought his right hand down to your throat and lightly pressed his fingers into your flesh. You moaned at the feeling and he began to squeeze. It wasn't enough to hurt, but it was definitely making it harder to breathe. You could feel the pleasure building in your lower stomach.
You had never explored breath play. You didn't think it would do much for you, but this was incredible. He knew exactly how to make it feel amazing. Your eyes fluttered shut and your body started to writhe against the bed.
He finally released you and you sucked in a deep breath. He sat up and grabbed the waistband with both hands. With a quick yank, he ripped them right off of your body, revealing your bra underneath. Your eyes widened in shock. "Buck, what the -"
"Shut up," he growled, as he moved his hand and began unbuttoning your pants. He yanked them down, along with your panties.
He quickly pulled off his shirt, pants, and boxers. His hard cock sprung free, precum leaking out of the tip. "Hands and knees, now," he commanded.
"Bucky -"
He gripped your chin tightly. "What did I say? I said hands and knees," he ordered, voice thick with arousal. "Don't make me repeat myself."
You swallowed hard, and nodded, doing as he said. You raised yourself on all fours as he moved behind you and grabbed your hips. He smacked your ass, causing you to jump. "Don't move," he said, his metal hand moving to wrap in your hair and tug making you cried out, and he pushed your face into the mattress.
You could feel his hand rubbing your pussy. Then his fingers were pushing inside you. "Look at you, all ready for me. So wet. I'm going to fuck you so hard. I'm not gonna hold back. I'm going to fuck you like you deserve to be fucked. Do you understand me?"
You could hear him spitting and then he was thrusting inside of you. "Ah, fuck," he groaned, as he bottomed out. He held onto your hips tightly, and didn't give you a moment to adjust. His fingers dug into your hips and he began pounding into you. "Is this what you wanted, Y/N?"
"Yes, yes," you moaned. He began fucking you harder, his hand leaving your hair and moving to your back. He pushed down, arching your back as his cock filled you again and again.
His flesh hand left your hip and he slapped your ass, hard. You whimpered at the pain, the sting of the slap turning to pleasure. Your eyes closed as his cock stretched you over and over. He slapped your ass again, his flesh hand gripping your hip again. He was pounding into you relentlessly now, his pace unrelenting. You gripped the bed sheets, his cock hitting that perfect spot.
"I can feel your pussy getting wetter. You're enjoying this, aren't you?" he asked. He was thrusting in and out of you hard. He was rougher than he'd ever been before. It almost hurt, but there was something else there. It was pleasure and lust. You liked the way he was using your body. "Such a tight little pussy," he grunted, as he rammed into you.
He held you still as he fucked you hard. You could hear him grunting and moaning, and the sound was so erotic, it made your pussy throb. You tried to keep your voice down, but you couldn't stop yourself from crying out.
"That's it, baby. Let me hear you. You want me to fuck you like this? You want me to make you scream? You like when I pound your little pussy?"
"Yes! Please!"
He wrapped his hand around your neck and started pulling you up against his chest. You could feel his cock slamming inside you, and it felt amazing. "Remember to use the safe word, if it's too much."
You looked at him over your shoulder. His face was flushed, and his pupils were dilated. He had a wild look in his eyes, and the sight made your heart beat faster. His pace was relentless. He was like a wild animal, his body slamming against yours. You could feel the pressure building up inside of you.
Your fingers curled around the sheets and you whimpered. He reached around, and pressed his metal fingers against your clit. You jolted and gasped. He didn't stop moving, even as he rubbed circles against your bundle of nerves.
He was thrusting harder and faster, and the feeling was so incredible, you started screaming. You were getting louder and louder, and the sounds coming out of you were animalistic. "Are you close, baby?" he asked.
"Yessss," you hissed.
"Come on, baby. Cum all over my cock. I want to feel your pussy clenching around me." he demanded, his voice gravelly.
His words sent you over the edge, you could feel the tension in your lower stomach and then the flood gates were open. Your orgasm hit you hard, your pussy clenching around him. He gripped your hips and kept pounding you until you were a trembling mess.
You collapsed onto your forearms, unable to hold yourself up anymore. Your orgasm had made you weak.
"Turn over," he ordered, pulling out. You obeyed, moving so that you were lying on your back, legs spread for him. He moved back in, pushing your knees up until they were almost to your shoulders. He entered you again and began pounding into you, his hips slamming against yours. You could feel him hitting all the right places.
He was groaning and moaning. He grabbed your throat and squeezed. You gasped for air and the lack of oxygen heightened your pleasure. "I love this. You're so beautiful when you're gasping for air," he groaned.
He didn't stop thrusting, his hips rocking in a steady rhythm. Your pussy was clenching around him, and he grunted in pleasure. "Your pussy feels so fucking good."
You were starting to get light-headed, and he finally released your throat. He moved his hands to your thighs and spread your legs open wide. You were panting heavily, and he leaned down and kissed you. The kiss was softer than the previous ones, and his tongue gently slid into your mouth.
Bucky kept fucking you harder and harder. He was like an animal. He was using you for his own pleasure. You closed your eyes, the sensation was overwhelming. Your mind was swimming with thoughts and feelings. You were completely at his mercy.
"Look at me." he ordered while cupping your cheek.
You opened your eyes and gazed up at him. He was looking down at you with a mixture of lust and admiration, his pupils dilated and his eyes dark. “Keep your eyes on me while I'm fucking you." he grunted, as he thrust into you again.
You nodded, your breath catching in your throat. He had such control over your body. He knew just how to move his hips, how to angle himself so he was hitting the spot that would make you see stars.
His hand then was squeezing your breast. You moaned and arched your back. He squeezed and massaged your breasts, and you felt your nipples hardening. You moaned as he pinched your nipple.
"Your tits are so perfect, baby. I could play with them all day." he said as he lowered his head and took your nipple in his mouth. He flicked his tongue over it, and you gasped. He sucked on it, his teeth grazing over it. You felt your pussy tighten around his cock making him groaned.
"Gonna come for me again?", He continued touching and teasing your breasts, and the sensation was incredible. He pinched your nipple between his teeth, and the pain mixed with pleasure, was so intense, you screamed.
You nodded. You were close. So close.
He grabbed your chin, holding you still as his hips moved against yours. "I can't hear you."
"Yes, I'm gonna come again," you cried, your body arching against his.
"Good," he breathed. His fingers moved to rub against your clit.
You moaned loudly, your hips moving against his hand. "Oh god, baby, I'm so close. Please make me come, please," you begged.
He rubbed your clit in slow circles, his cock pumping into you. You could feel your orgasm approaching and you closed your eyes. "Look at me," he growled, his voice harsh. Your eyes flew open and you stared at him, panting.
"I'm gonna -" you broke off as your orgasm hit. You screamed, your body arching against his as he continued his relentless pace, drawing it out as long as he could.
He moaned, his hips jerking erratically. He was close. You could feel it. You wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him closer. "Oh fuck." he groaned, and with one last thrust, he came. You could feel him filling you up, and you cried out in pleasure. He kept thrusting into you, as you both came down from your high. He collapsed on top of you, and you could feel him softening inside you.
He collapsed on top of you, his breathing ragged. Your heart was pounding, and you were pretty sure your soul had just left your body. He pressed a soft kiss to your lips before he rolled off of you and lay down beside you. "Shit, doll, I've missed that," he sighed.
You laughed, as Bucky slowly moving to lay your head on his chest. His flesh hand stroked your hair. "So have I, Buck."
You both lay in comfortable silence for a few minutes. You could feel his heartbeat begin to return to normal, as yours finally did. "Are you okay, doll? Was I too rough?" he asked.
"No." you said breathlessly, kissing his chest. "You were perfect."
“Are you really okay? I’m sorry if I was being too rough, I-”
Cutting off his words with a lingering kiss, you pulled away with a smile. "I have a safe word, remember? If I didn't like it, I would have used it," you assured him.
He sighed. "I'm sorry, doll. You know I’d never hurt you right?”
"I know," you whispered, your fingers tracing patterns on his skin. You felt another sigh escape him, and you could sense his relief. "It's okay. You don't need to apologize. I'm the one who wanted you to act like yourself."
"But I shouldn't have taken it out on you." He sat up, cupping your cheek with a gentleness that contrasted with the intensity of moments ago. "You deserve better than that."
"Hey," you whispered, placing your hand over his. "You were just frustrated. It's okay. I know you'd never hurt me."
"But -"
You silenced him by pressing a finger to his lips. "I'm fine, Buck. And we're okay," you reassured him, looking him straight in the eyes, making sure he could see you were telling the truth.
"Thank you. For everything." He kissed you softly.
You pulled him back down onto the bed and cuddled up to him. You laid there, enjoying each other's warmth. You felt like things were finally going to be okay, as if the storm had passed and left a calm in its wake. Bucky then broke the silence. "It was a rough mission.”
"I can tell. Wanna talk about it?" you asked, your fingers playing with his hair.
He sighed, and you could feel him tense up slightly. "Hydra." He said the word like it felt a bitter taste in his mouth. "There was a group of Hydra agents. I recognized one of them."
"One of the agents?"
"He was my handler, for a while." He looked at you, and you saw pain and fear in his eyes. "He was a bastard. He was always the one to do the worst experiments on me."
"That explains the anger," you sighed. "I'm sorry. It must have been hard to see them again."
"It was. It still is." He closed his eyes. "I hate that he's out there. And it's my fault. I should have captured him. But instead, I let him get away."
"How did that happen?” You tried to comfort him, but you didn't really know how to help him with his emotional pain.
"He managed to escape, and I couldn't let him get away. I had to bring him in. So I chased him." He took a deep breath, and you could feel him trembling slightly. "We fought, and I was winning. Then, I got a call from Sam. The team was under attack."
"And you had to choose between saving the team and capturing that son of a bitch?" You felt bad for him.
He nodded. "I chose the team. The Hydra agents escaped, but the team is safe."
You kissed him, gently. "Bucky, that was the right thing to do. The team needed your help, and I'm glad you were there for them. That man, he's not worth your guilt."
"But I let him get away. And if he gets away, he'll be able to continue his work." You could tell Bucky regretted that a lot, his eyes were filled with pain and regret.
"It's not your fault. You chose to save your team, and that's what matters." You sat up and put your hand on his chest. “Buck, I promise. I know you can't forget what happened, and I would never want you to, but don't let the past ruin your future. He may be free now, but that's only temporary. We'll catch him, and all the other bastards. You're the most capable person I know. I trust you."
He didn't look convinced, he played with your hair not looking straight to your eyes, "Hey, look at me." you cupped his face. "I know me just being beside you won’t help much, but let me try to help ease your worry… talk to me whenever you’re facing hardship. We’re a team remember?”
He smiled at you, "I know, sweetheart.” He went up to pulled you into a kiss, his hand slowly went to your neck as he deepened the kiss. "Thank you, doll. You always know what to say to make me feel better."
"I try." You smiled and kissed his nose.
"I'm gonna get a shower. Do you wanna come with me?" He asked.
You nodded and let him lead you to the bathroom, he was still holding your hand from when he had been dragging you out of bed.
Bucky pulled you into the shower as he turned the shower on, but the surprise of cold water made you yelp. "Cold!" you complained.
"Sorry, doll." He quickly adjusted the temperature, and as the warmth enveloped you both, he stepped under the spray, pulling you in with him.
You giggled. "We should have checked the temperature first."
He chuckled. "Yeah, we should have." You both laughed as the water warmed you up. "Better?"
"Mhmm, a lot better." You smiled and affectionately kissed his cheek.
He grinned and you went to grabbed the shampoo. "Here, let me help."
"Sure." You let him take the shampoo bottle.
Bucky squeezed some onto his hands and gently rubbed his hands in your hair, his fingers were massaging your scalp as he washed your hair. "How's that feel?"
"Really nice. You can do my hair every day." You grinned.
"I'll keep that in mind." He smirked and kept washing your hair. His hands moved gently, and you relaxed under his touch. You moaned as your eyes fluttered close. Bucky chuckled, "I think someone likes her scalp massaged." He teased, his fingers moving across your head.
"You're really good at this." You murmured, you were in heaven.
"Does it?" He asked, his fingers working on getting the soap out.
"Yeah, I love your hands." You moaned. "You're so good with your hands."
He laughed. "I've been told that many times."
Opening your eyes, you caught the cheeky grin on his face. "I'm sure there are other things that your hands are good at."
He grinned wider. "Why don't you tell me about those?" His playful tone invited your banter.
"Well," you started. "If I recall correctly. Those hands can make a girl orgasm like nothing else." You purred.
"Really? I thought it was my cock that did that." He smirked and rinsed the shampoo out.
You moaned, his fingers were still working their magic. "Oh no, it's definitely the hands."
"Maybe I need to check your theory," he mused. "Is it just the hands or is it something else that could be done to you?" He asked with a playful glint in his eye.
"I don't know." You moaned as his fingers found their way further down. "But you might have to experiment. For science."
"I might just have to do that." Bucky's hand wrapped around the back of your neck and pulled you into a hungry kiss. Your hands tangled in his hair, and you kissed him back. He pushed you up against the wall and ground his hips against yours, his hardening length sliding over your clit.
"Fuck, I need you, Bucky." You whimpered.
"Not yet, doll" He smirked. "I need to wash your body first." He grabbed the soap and rubbed it between his hands to create a lather. His hands started rubbing all over your body.
You sighed in bliss as his hands glided over you. The soap made it even more enjoyable as his hands slid across your body. "Turn around." He murmured and you did as he asked.
"Good girl." He said as his hands glided over your shoulders, he slowly massaged the soap into your skin and moved down your back. His hands moved further down and gripped your ass, his fingers digging into your soft skin.
"Your ass is so amazing." He said.
"Why, thank you." You grinned. "Yours is pretty spectacular too." You looked over your shoulder and winked.
He smirked. "You like my ass?"
"Hell yeah, it's gorgeous." You smiled.
He laughed. "Good, I like yours more."
He moved his hands to the front of you and cupped your breasts. He squeezed them and his thumb and forefinger rolled your nipples. You arched your back and pressed your ass against him, feeling his hard cock between your ass cheeks.
"So responsive." He chuckled and moved his hands down. "Lean against the wall."
You did as he asked and leaned against the wall. He moved one hand around your waist and the other went down your body and rubbed between your thighs. "Fuck, Bucky. I need you." You moaned.
"Hmm, you're so wet already, doll." He asked as his finger slid between your folds and rubbed over your clit.
"Always wet for you." You replied, his fingers rubbing against your clit making your breath hitch.
"Damn right." He added another finger and his thumb found your clit. He circled the bundle of nerves as his fingers pumped in and out of you.
You moaned and rocked your hips, trying to get him to go faster. "Please, Bucky."
He kissed your shoulder and then bit down, his teeth grazing over your skin. His fingers pumped harder and faster, hitting that perfect spot. "Fuck, Bucky. You're going to make me cum." You cried out.
His other hand left your breast and moved up to grip your throat, squeezing slightly. "That's the idea, doll." He said in your ear.
Your breathing became erratic, and you felt yourself getting close. "Bucky..." You whimpered.
"Yeah, I've got you, doll." He said, his fingers still pumping. "Come for me."
Your hips bucked as his fingers continued their assault. "Ah, fuck! Fuck, Bucky!" You screamed as your orgasm ripped through you. Your legs almost gave out, but Bucky's arms kept you upright.
"That's my good girl." He cooed, his fingers slowing their movements.
"Bucky..." You moaned, trying to catch your breath. Your hand went down to stroke his cock making him groan. You turned your head and looked at him closing his eyes and moaning at the feeling of your hands on him.
"You're gonna be the death of me, Y/N." He said as you pumped him.
You chuckled. "You know you love it."
He groaned. "Yes, I do." He looked down and watched as your hand moved up and down his length. "Fuck." He stopped your hand, "You're going to make me cum, and I want to be inside of you when I do."
"Well, what are you waiting for then?" You grinned and turned to face him.
"I was being a gentleman." He smirked. He pulled you into a searing kiss and you wrapped your arms around his neck. Your fingers were tangling in his hair and his hands were on your waist, he lifted you up and pushed you up against the tiled wall. You gasped and broke the kiss. "Fuck, yes." You moaned.
"Hold on to me." He said, and you wrapped your legs around his waist. He grabbed his cock and lined himself up with your entrance. He slowly slid into you, his eyes never leaving yours. You moaned and threw your head back, enjoying the feeling of him inside of you.
"You feel so good, doll." He said.
"So do you, baby." You whimpered.
He began thrusting his hips and you cried out. "Harder!" You moaned. His hands held you up and he started to thrust into you. "Is this what you wanted?" He asked, his voice low and husky.
"Yes! Oh god, yes!" You moaned, he was hitting all the right spots and it was driving you crazy.
"That's my good girl. Let me hear you, doll." He grunted.
You were panting and moaning loudly as he thrust into you. Your eyes closed as you focused on the feeling of him inside you. His cock was hitting the spot that made your toes curl.
"Fuck, Bucky! Right there!" You screamed.
"That's it, baby. Take my cock." He growled. His hands tightened around your waist as he slammed into you. You put your hands around his neck and held on as he fucked you.
"Shit, I'm close, baby." He said, his hips were still moving and his cock was slamming into you. "Come with me, Y/N."
Your walls started to flutter and you felt yourself coming undone. "Oh fuck! I'm gonna cum!" You cried out.
Bucky groaned. "That's it, doll. Cum for me."
You screamed his name as you came hard. Your walls clamped down on him and your nails dug into his skin. He cursed and followed after you. "Fuck, Y/N." He thrust into you a few more times and came inside of you. His hips still moving as he rode out his orgasm.
He gently put you down, but kept his arms around you to hold you up. You were panting, trying to catch your breath.
"I fucking love shower sex." You grinned.
Bucky laughed. "I can tell. That was fucking hot." He kissed you, his tongue slipping into your mouth and dominating the kiss.
"Mmm, that was so good." You sighed, resting your head against his chest.
"Yeah, it was." He smiled and stroked your hair. You closed your eyes and relaxed against him. "You okay, doll?"
"Hmmm, yeah." You said. "I'm all clean, but you aren't. Come here."
You grabbed the shampoo and squeezed some into your hand. You massaged the shampoo into his hair and he groaned. "That feels so good, doll."
You giggled and continued to wash his hair. "I'm glad."
"Give my back some attention," he requested, and you eagerly complied, taking your time to wash his back, relishing the tactile pleasure of the soap meeting his skin. You enjoyed the feel of his muscles under your fingertips.
"There. All clean." You beamed with satisfaction at the completion of the task.
"Thanks, doll." His smirk reflected a playful appreciation for your efforts.
"Anytime, baby." You responded with a teasing affection.
"Let's get out of here before we get cold," he suggested, breaking the cozy spell of the shower. You agreed, the warmth of the water now juxtaposed with the cooler air outside the shower enclosure. You stepped out of the shower and grabbed a towel, wrapping it around your body.
"I love it when you're all wet." Bucky said, coming up behind you and wrapping his arms around you.
"You're so corny." You giggled.
"Yeah, but you love it." He smirked.
You rolled your eyes and walked out of the bathroom, grabbing a fresh pair of clothes from your dresser. You put the towel back and dressed in your new clothes.
He led you back to the bedroom, and you got dressed. "I'm really sorry, doll for snapping at you earlier."
"It's okay, Bucky." You smiled and gave him a kiss.
He frowned. "No, I was a dick."
"Well, that's not new." You playfully teased, giving a bit of humor into the moment.
He chuckled. "True, but I was an extra big dick."
"So, I should have you measured?" You quipped, a mischievous smirk gracing your face.
"You've been spending too much time with me." He shook his head, appreciating the banter.
"You say that like it's a bad thing." You teased.
"No, not at all. It's just you're becoming more like me." He laughed, but the levity faded as he grew serious. "I don't ever want you to be like me. You're a good person, Y/N, and I don't want you to become jaded and bitter."
"Bucky, it's okay. I know you're trying to be better. You're changing for the better. And if we're both together, I'm sure that we'll keep each other on the right path." You told him.
He gave you a smile and a kiss. "That's my girl."
A blush tinted your cheeks. Despite the time you'd spent together, compliments from Bucky still sent butterflies fluttering in your stomach.
"I'm sorry for keeping all of this from you," he admitted, his gaze carrying the weight of his confession.
"I get why you did. But it's not easy for me to see you like this and not be able to help. You are the person I care most about, and I don't like seeing you hurt," you confessed.
"I know. And I hate to see you hurt. It kills me." He replied.
"I think you're forgetting that I'm a badass." You winked, injecting a moment of playfulness into the serious conversation.
"That's true. You're my tough cookie." He grinned, appreciating the effort to lighten the mood.
"And don't you forget it." You pointed at him.
"I never could." He kissed you softly. "I love you, Y/N."
You felt your cheeks heat up. No matter how many times he told you, the impact of those three words never faded, and you couldn't help but feel a flutter in your chest. "I love you, Bucky."
You climbed onto the bed and Bucky wrapped his arms around you. He sighed, contently. "I think this is where I belong."
"Where?" You asked, confused.
"In bed with you. It's like I'm home when I'm with you." He told you, his fingers traced absentminded patterns on your back.
A small smile played on your lips. "You are home, Bucky," you gently reminded him, your touch tracing along his arm.
Bucky pressed a tender kiss to the top of your head, "You're right. You're my home, Y/N."
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Hi, just wanted to let you know that I'm open to requests. However, due to my ongoing commitments with school, work, and my own projects, it might take a while for me to get to them. I appreciate your understanding and am truly grateful for all the requests I've received! Thank you! xx
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dinanikto · 3 months
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Spoilers: Episode 4 of the Walten Files
I think people misunderstood Felix as a character?
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I've seen so many fans WISHING that Felix would actually die?? Like, "if I was Jack, I would beat the shit out of Felix" or "Felix, do a flip".
I thought it was shown pretty well that he is not in the right state of mind.
Before reading this, please, gather all of your compassion and sympathy, and listen to what I'm about to say with a clear mind.
Let's speak chronologically:
1) Felix and Jack meet in college and decide to create animatronic-based restaurant. They are teens/young adults in the year 1958-1964 (not truly canon, but close to). According to Martin, they're very close, they love and trust each other.
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2) Jack meets Rosemary, they start dating. She creates designs for Bon and other characters.
Felix is, presumably, left alone to himself, as he doesn't have anyone else.
3) They graduate and contact CyberFun Tech.
Felix meets and marries Linda, while Jack and Rosemary have their first kid.
4) october 30th, 1964.
Linda notes Felix's heavy drinking and his poor self image. She's stressed and scared.
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Felix is close with the Walten family. Jack and Rose get two more kids, and they all call him uncle!
And yet, he doesn't feel welcome. He uses alcohol as a coping mechanism. "He drinks for the sole purpose of drinking!"
Please note, the year is 1964!! Even nowadays not many people can get help and cure their addictions. Not many people believe that they can, or that they deserve it.
5) december 25th, 1970.
Krankens and Waltens are so close they spend Christmas together. And yet, Felix is burdened with something.
Jack and Rose are lovey dovey, Felix and Linda are not. Waltens have three kids that love their parents deeply, Krankens do not. Jack is happy, and Felix is not.
He's still using alcohol to calm himself down.
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He can't control himself anymore.
Linda tries to talk to him, but Felix doesn't respond. Or rather, it's how Linda frames it.
"He feels bad about it, but doesn't try to change."
Honestly? Sounds like he tries to communicate, but his depression isn't letting him do it well. Again, it's 1970, and I don't think anyone has ever truly tried to help him.
He's a man. Why can't he man up? Jack is doing fine, why can't you, Felix?
Or why won't you just tell everyone how you feel? It's not like men have been bottling their emotions for decades now, right?
6) april 1974.
The Bon's Burgers is about to be open in a few weeks.
Felix and Linda have a fight (verbal). He hurts her feelings.
Jack asks Felix to pick up kids from a school party. Felix says no at first, but Jack won't listen.
Eventually, Felix says yes.
7) morning of may 2nd, 1974.
Linda leaves Felix. Only thing left after her is a note.
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No talking, no nothing. His wife of 10+ years left him.
Have you ever gone through a breakup? A breakup with your spouse? Were you in an intoxicated state of mind when your wife left you? Were you depressed when seemingly everyone have left you?
Wait, right, he has Waltens. So of course he's gonna get those kids home, that's the only thing left for him! Everyone are asking him of it.
7) evening of may 2nd, 1974.
The car crash happens.
8) may 3rd, 1974.
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He's awfully drunk. He's depressed. He got almost killed. He tried to kill himself twice. He has no one to talk about this with.
He has killed two children. Children that he loved.
Jack is going to hate him. And he does! Jack DOES want to kill him, Felix knows it even before speaking to him.
Note that he's not afraid of Rosemary.
9) may 3-6th, 1974.
He hides. He doesn't sleep for three days, and gets hallucinations.
He's scared. But the fact he actually faced Waltens is surprising. He's trying to fix things as best as he can.
10) may 6th, 1974
He lies. What else can he do?
Jack disappears. Susan disappears. Rosemary and Charles disappear. Brian and Ashley disappear.
And THIS is noway near his fault.
Bon's Burgers close. He has no money, several murder cases. Everybody is dead.
_____________________________________________
And after all of this, people don't find Felix even a little bit likeable? But support an agressive, irrational Jack, who was blind to his brother's struggling and pain? Who was the only person to not notice Felix's drinking problem?!? I'm confused.
I feel like Felix almost constantly. The mentally ill guy with no support system, that has no one to talk to. Never the one to get any help, even when having a "family".
And it's not like he thinks that he deserves love and attention. He never goes searching for Linda. He tries to end his life multiple times. He's masking as a nice corporate guy, while suffering internally.
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He suffers more than anybody else in the series. And why? What did he do? Did anyone teach him how to deal with these situations?
In conclusion: don't hate people. Never ever wish the worst for them, especially publicly.
And if you associate yourself with Kranken? Try to get help. Again, and again, and again. We live in a scary, but wonderful world. Your life is worth living, you deserve to be happy. Don't give up.
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lixzey · 6 months
Text
the name of the game
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Sirius Orion Black has, for the first time in history, lost.
Sirius was known to be a bit of a daredevil, always betting with his friends for things he knew he could do no matter what. However, he had just suffered his first ever loss in a bet. He agreed to a bet against James, that he could get five detentions within a week. He was sure it would be easy, and that he would win. But when the end of the week came, he had only gotten four detentions. James had won the bet, and Sirius couldn't believe it.
Now, because of the terms of the bet, he had to do whatever James wanted him to do.
One would think that since they were best friends, it would be easy and all that, but it wasn't.
Yes, Sirius Black and James Potter were the best of mates, but that doesn't mean they'd go easy on one another. Others would think it's pathetic, but Sirius and James enjoy making their lives a little bit harder. But above all, they have been through all the good and bad together—well, mostly the bad.
Sirius knew James like the back of his hand. It was James' first time winning a bet; naturally, he'd take his time picking a dare for Sirius. The possibilities were endless, and knowing his friend, it was bound to be either humiliating or disgusting—like how Sirius always dared James.
“I know what to do with you.” James smirked, his eyes gleaming with mischief.
Sirius rolled his eyes. “Let's get this done and over with.”
“For the love of Merlin, don't make Sirius show his arse in the Great Hall, James.” Peter groaned from beside Sirius, leaning over the wall behind him.
"Oh, I won't, Pete.” James grinned, turning to face Sirius. “I dare you to go on a date with someone.”
Sirius cocked an eyebrow at him, a smug smile gracing his lips. James wanted him to date someone. It was too easy! Here he was thinking that James would dare him to punch Snape or any other Slytherin, for that matter. Sirius has no problem getting a girl. It was too bloody easy. All he had to do was smile, and a girl would be on her knees, begging for him.
As if reading Sirius' mind, James smirked. “Oh, I'm not done yet, Pads.”
Sirius rolled his eyes. “Go on then, Prongsie.”
“I dare you to go on a date with someone,” James repeated. “And you have to ask her to be your girlfriend.”
Sirius nearly choked on his own saliva. James wanted him to go on a date with someone and ask her to be his girlfriend. What kind of sick joke was that? Sirius has never asked anyone to be his girlfriend in all of his eighteen years of existence. He'd hook up with girls and forget about it the next morning. Sirius Black never commits, even if it's only for a dare.
“I'm not doing that, James.” Sirius crossed his arms over his chest.
“You have to!” James said indignantly. “I did everything you wanted each time I lost a bet!”
Sirius thought back to the last thing he had James do when he lost against him. Sirius had told James to ask Lily Evans out in the most exaggerated way possible. He made James sing and dance in front of everyone in the Great Hall. It was hilarious seeing James proclaim his love for Lily Evans wearing dress robes only to get hit in the head by a dictionary-sized book.
Remus sighed and shook his head. “It's a terrible idea, James.”
“Oh, please, Moony. I deserve this! Padfoot always wins, and this may be the first and last time I get to win and dare him to do shit.”
Remus raised a brow at James. “You want to drag an innocent girl into this just because Sirius always wins?”
“Don't be such a buzzkill, Moony.” James rolled his eyes, playfully shoving Remus to the side. “So what do you say, Padfoot? You game?”
“I'm in,” Sirius said without thinking. “It's not that hard; I mean, how bad could it be?”
James' grin widened. “Glad to hear it, my good friend.” James then started to elaborate on his dare.
1. Sirius has to court a girl of James' choosing.
2. Date her for a year, and when she's completely head over heels for him,
3. He has to break her heart and tell her it was all an act, all part of a dare.
“I bet you can't do this, Pads,” James teased, wrapping his arm around Sirius.
Sirius scoffed. “I can and I will do this. You're on, Potter.”
James and Sirius shook hands, marking the start of the dare. Remus sighed in annoyance, while Peter had no choice but to support Sirius. Unlike the past bets the Marauders made, this was a secret; no one else could know about it.
“So, which girl is Sirius going to date?” Peter asked. James' eyes scanned around the courtyard, choosing between the girls scattered around.
“Her.” James declared after a while, pointing to a girl clad in gryffindor robes who sat alone by the large fountain. She had long (y/h/c) hair that fell over her shoulders in soft waves and bright (y/e/c) eyes that were glued to the book in her hands.
Sirius stared at the girl, confused. “Who is she? I don't know her.”
James snorted. “She's in our year, you dolt.”
“You were far too busy flirting with every other girl here at Hogwarts to even notice her.” Peter shrugged.
“Honestly, Sirius. You've spent nearly seven years at this bloody castle.” James tutted mockingly.
Sirius continued to stare at the girl. How come he has never seen her before? She was in the same house as him, and yet he never noticed her.
Of course you don't know her, a voice in the back of Sirius' head whispered. You hardly notice anyone who's not worthy of your attention.
“Who is she, then?”
“That's Y/N L/N.” Remus said matter-of-factly. “I've sat with her once in Arithmancy.”
“She's perfect!” James exclaimed. “You two can get to know each other.” he teased, wiggling his eyebrows.
Sirius rolled his eyes before breaking into a mischievous grin. “Game on.”
“You'll start tomorrow, Pads.” James said, patting him on the back. “You have until graduation.”
Sirius smirked confidently. “This is going to be fun.” This was going to be a piece of cake. He won't need a whole year to make Y/N L/N fall in love with him.
“Give me a week, and Y/N L/N will be mine. Mark my words.’’
Remus rolled his eyes, sighing in defeat. This was a bad idea, and he knew it would backfire in the worst way possible. But Sirius was too stubborn to listen. This was only the start of another one of Sirius' stupidity, and knowing Sirius, there would be more to follow.
@helens3amstuff @gatoenlaciudad @thebetawolfgirl @lovemelikecrazyiloveyoucrazy @tchalamss @lilmaymayy @ashlynnmalfoy @crazycat-ladys-blog @michakune @mxltifxnd0m @spencerr3idd @dangelnleif @sthkate @ferrjulie @imnotoverlyobsessive @mel-vaz @elsagreeer @lovely-maryj @meowmeowmau @bobthe-turmpetman29 @saintcosette
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elliesmistress · 22 days
Text
EPISODE 1: PILOT
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WARNINGS: 18+, heavy drug usage (cocaine, weed, alcohol, etc), oral sex (R, E, D, A, ETC), tribbing, overdoses (reader), mentions of overdoses, angst, EVERYONE WILL BE IN COLLEGE AS EUPHORIA IS SET IN HIGHSCHOOL!, mentions of self harm, Jules will be transgender (same in the show, except sex won't be with her), shoplifting, mentions of death, NATE and his family will most likely be left out of this completely and set with new characters that are less toxic, dealer!ellie (sometimes), drug deals, swearing, less abusive relationships but still toxic, mentions of rehab, rehab (detox), death, degradation, toxic sex, rough sex, strap usage, strap sucking, mentioning of 9/11, lmk if I missed anything please!
a/n: this will be VERY similar to Euphoria, you will be RUE (Due to it being "your" story I will be writing it with 'I' as Rue talks). I just need to figure out where abby, dina, jesse, etc will fit into the story. I do know abby will be CAT very likely all the characters will be the exact same (besides from Nate and his parents) I've struggled with a few of the problems in Euphoria and I've written my own fic about MY addictions but I figured I'd do Euphoria too hehe, I will be removing the SA parts of the story because that's just something I don't want to have on my page. Please let me know if you want to be on the taglist whilst I actually have inspo to write :) 3.8K WORDS, spell checked and shit idk man it's like 4 hours past my bed time and 1am
I WILL BE MAKING A EUPHRIA PLAYLIST FOR EACH CHAPTER!
Taglist: @snowy-vee , @vqxen @pedropascalsbbg
PRESENT DAY
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"I was once happy, content, sloshing around in my own private primordial pool." I am standing in front of hundreds of people who are here listening to my story—to say the very least, I was nervous. I always have been a fucking addict, and now I'm telling my story of how I recovered from this fucking disease that ruined my fucking life.
"Then one day, for reasons beyond my control, I was repeatedly crushed." I blink my eyes, looking at the floor, struggling to find the right words: "over and over by the cruel cervix of my mother, Grace."
"I put up a good fight, but I lost, for the first time, and definitely not my last... I was born three days after 9/11."
Memories flood back to when I could hear the TV going on the day I was born.
"I can hear you; I can hear you; the rest of the world hears you; and the people who knocked these buildings down will hear all of us soon." The unknown man says on the TV that hearing the words "USA, USA!" being chanted over and over again made me cry as a baby. Those chants will forever haunt me.
"My mom and dad spent two days in the hospital, holding me under the soft glow of the television, watching the towers fall over and over again, until the feelings of grief gave way to numbness." I shift uncomfortably in the silence of the audience, glancing at my good friends Jesse and Ellie, who indicate for me to keep talking. A soft chuckle comes from my lips as I continue on with the story.
"And then," I take a deep breath, "without warning, we moved to a friendly neighborhood in the suburbs, to where a middle-class child, me to be exact, was looking up at the ceiling, counting those fucking numbers like I could fucking see them. Over and over again. 'thirteen... fourteen... fifteen... sixteen."
"My mother looked up at that ceiling like I was fucking crazy; the words she said echo through my dumb brain still: 'What are you looking at, y/n?'" "I kept counting, trying my hardest to ignore her. She said to me, 'y/n, look at me."
I chuckle. "I bet you all know where this is going. I kept counting, but from the start," and my smile dropped immediately.
"I remember breaking down and crying when my mother tried to snap me out of it. I wanted... I had nothing but to cry, so that's what I did. I sat in a doctor's office a few weeks later with my mother crying next to me as the doctor said I could be suffering from obsessive-compulsive disorder, attention deficit disorder, general anxiety disorder, and possible bipolar disorder." I put my hand up close to the mic to cup it. "But I was a little too young to tell," I said in a joking tone, cracking a laugh from the crowd. "Y'all get me; y'all fucking get me."
"With this being said, I was put on medication to treat half of the disorders I had, and to be honest, I don't remember much between the ages of 8 and 12. Just that the world moves fast and my brain moves so fucking slowly."
"I would sit my fucking ass in class every day and try my hardest to listen to what that fucking teacher was trying to teach, but sometimes I would focus on my breathing a little too hard. I'd die. That teacher held a bag to my mouth to calm my breathing, though it never really helped. I remember trying to outrun my anxiety every day, looking in the mirror and trying to push my stomach in so I wouldn't look "fat."
"I would constantly get messages from people telling me they wanted to kill me, drug me, make fun of me, and bully me. My mother knew something was up and constantly asked me what was wrong, but I always gave the same response: 'I'm just fucking exhausted."
AGE 19 (college years)
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"You said the doctor was in our network. How could he suddenly be out of network?" I hear my mother say as I walk out of my room into the kitchen, "I can't afford it" Grace says.
"did you see the beauty queen who got acid thrown in her face?" My sister says as I begin to lean on the dinning room table. "Mm, what? No" I say, turning my attention to her and out of my trance. "it's pretty fucked up." She says holding up her phone. "Hey, Mom, you got any tampons?" I turned my head to face her as she looked at the documents in her hand, I knew full well I wasn't going to be getting tampons but she didn't need to know that shit.
"in my bathroom, under the sink." She replies back, I swiftly make my way to the bathroom.
I enter her bathroom and cough as I open her medicine cabinet to take a few of her Alprazolam (XANAX) pills.
I would do this countless times, and surprisingly at some point, you make a choice about who you are and what you want in life.
I pretend to flush the toilet and I look at the picture in my mother's bathroom- it had my dad and my Mom on it on their wedding day.
I look at myself in the mirror washing my hands and putting on sunglasses to hide my pupils that are almost as big as my actual eye itself- I get out of the bathroom to go back into the kitchen
"alright, Jayda, let's roll." I say to my sister as she looks at me and frowns, probably these fucking sunglasses.
"y/n, did you eat breakfast?" Grace says, moving the phone away from her mouth. "I had coffee!" I yell out, opening the front door and making my way out.
Jayda and I begin to walk down the sidewalk, she turns her attention onto me and asks what's with the sunglasses.
"what sunglasses?" I say and chuckle, Jayda laughs with me.
We both make our way to the bus and wait for it to arrive, once it arrives we get on the bus and make our way to the back of the bus.
I guess... I showed up one day, without a map or a compass... Or to be honest, anyone capable of giving on iota of good fucking advice. And I know it all may seem sad, but guess what? I didn't build this system nor did I fuck it up.
I was sitting at a party, with a galaxy book to my knees and a line of cocaine, holding the perfectly rolled 5 dollar bill that had been rolled by some rando.
I snort the line of cocaine and immediately felt the pain in my nose, moving my hand up to my nose and applying pressure to where it is painful, making my breathing hitch, then speeding up my breathing in order to get rid of the pain.
My pupils immediately shot big, looking around��everything felt good, my mind at ease and nothing to worry about. I sit up with the most unreal experience, an out-of-body feeling as I struggle to get up.
"y/n, you good?" My friend Ellie attempts to hold my shoulders to steady me as I wobble slightly, I giggle and smile at her, escaping her grasp. "I'm good!"
I walk past people- everything is in slow motion, my body feels slow, my mind feels slow, and suddenly I no longer feel as high- I find another unknown substance and waste no time snorting it, sitting down on the couch.
I sat back up from the couch I was sitting at, getting offered yet another line of cocaine. I snort that cocaine as well, that leaves it hard for me to breathe, every time I take a breathe out. It feels like I'm breathing out all the oxygen I have.
And then it happens. That moment when your breath starts to slow, and every time you breathe, you breathe out all the oxygen you have. And everything stops: your heart, your lungs, then finally your brain. Then everything you feel, and wish, and want to forget, it all just sinks. And then suddenly... You give it air again, give it life again, and that's what leaves you needing more.
I smile at the figure I see besides me, her face is blurred but she's speaking to me, I feel scared. "I want to call an ambulance" I say in my mind, "but I don't wanna ruin everyone's time"
"dude get her fucking legs" I hear muffled voices, slowly waking up. It was Ellie and Jesse dragging my body to Ellie's bed, after I had passed out on the couch at that random frat party-
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I stand in a church with my hands behind my back, looking up at the ceiling waiting to graduate from rehab. Slowly making my way up the steps, I look at the lady and give her a smile and a nod before exiting the building.
"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference." Echoing in my mind over and over again as I make my way to Ellie's car.
"Hey!" I see Ellie running up to me. I drop my bags as she pulls me into a tight hug. I smiled at her shoulder. She squeals, letting go of me and looking at my face, pulling a hair strand behind my ear.
"I've missed you," she admits. "I've missed you too."
"What about we go back to mine and we can watch a movie?" Ellie suggests that, honestly, I wanted to get home and get out to my fucking dealer. I never had intentions of staying clean, but she didn't need to know.
"Uh yeah, sure," I say, quickly breaking myself out of my own stance. She helps me with my bag, and she puts it in Joel's old, beat-up truck, and I get into the front seat. "Everyone's missed you, dude, Abby, Dina, Jesse, and Maddie. Fucking everyone, dude."
I chuckle.
-
I cuddle up with Ellie in her dad's garage as we watch Jurassic Park. I'm on top of her, listening to her breathing—she's relaxed; she's always around me.
I find myself nuzzling into her neck. She moves her head to the side, so you have better access to her neck. I softly kiss her neck; she's always so soft.
Her eyes flutter shut as I start to suck on her neck, her hands finding their way to my ass, slowly rocking me back and forth to grind on her. Ellie let out a choked moan as she felt my clothed cunt rub against her clit.
"Y/N, fuck," she moans. I smile against her neck and make my way to Ellie's lips.
I kiss her slowly, but Ellie starts to become desperate, whining into my mouth as I refuse to give her what she wants. I move my hand underneath her hoodie to find her tits; of course she's not wearing a fucking bra or shirt under her jumper. It's Ellie.
"Wait," I say, pulling down her pants and boxers in one go. I look at her swollen cunt, slowly moving my head downward to lick up her slit, making my way to her clit.
She bucks her hips up into my tongue, I moan into her cunt, and she tangles her hand in my hair, slightly tugging upwards, making me groan loudly.
"S-sh-it," her voice is choked. "Fuck, just like that," she moans, rolling her eyes back, her toes curling in her socks. "Hmm? Feel good, baby?" I say to her, slowly lifting my head up, abandoning her swollen cunt.
"Fucking don't," she threatened, and I chuckled. I push my middle finger into her soaking pussy as I attach back to her clitoral area; her breathing gets faster, and I feel her tighten around my fingers.
"F-FUCK!" She moans loudly, and I feel her pussy conract on my finger as she cums, her fingers tugging at my hair. "A bit loud, don't you think?" I tease after letting her ride out her orgasm, and I move up to kiss her sweaty forehead. "Shut up"
"got another in you?" I smirk, taking off my pants, t-shirt, and bra. Ellie takes off her jumper, leaving us both naked. I allow Ellie to get up and let her go on top of me.
Ellie aligns her clit up with mine and moans quickly, filling the room each time Ellie moves her hips. I start to dig your nails into Ellie's back, making her groan in pain.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck," Ellie chants from the overstimulation. "C'mon, baby, I know—fuck, I know you can do it." I praise her as I feel a knot in my stomach, threatening to come undone.
Ellie moves her shoulder closer to my face. I take this as an opportunity to bite down on her shoulder, which makes her wince in pain.
"I'm going to fucking cum!" Ellie moans out. Hearing Ellie say this triggers my own orgasm, and we both cum together.
-
I sit up in bed watching Ellie sleep, and I take out my phone to look at the time.
4AM
"Fuck it," I think before opening Ellie's window slowly, climbing out her window, and making my way to my dealer's house.
-
"There's a new girl in town I think you're going to be friends with." I stand in front of my dealer, who's sitting down in his chair. "who?" I question.
"shit... I don't know, man. She came in yesterday lookin' all Sailor Moon and sh*t. I'm thinking to myself, "You look like somebody you would get along with."
"Ah, real nice, dude. Really nice, where's ash?"
"I thought you went to rehab?"
"Doesn't that mean I stayed sober?" I smiled, walking towards Ash's room with a smile. I opened his door to see him eating cereal. He puts down his bowl and looks at me.
"Shit, I thought your ass was dead."
"I thought you had Asperger's till I realized you're just a prick." I insult him. "This is a fickle industry. Y'all come and go." He chuckles.
I ask for what I want, and he hands it to me. "Sure, you don't want to try anything new?"
"Like, what?" I asked, pulling the hair out of my face.
"2-C-T-2, 2C-T-7, and 5-MeO-DIPT." "I have no idea what the fuck you just said, Ash."
"Doesn't matter, dude, this sh*t. Is fucking lit?" He holds up a bag with two unknown pills. "It's a fast-acting psychedelic. I have some similarities to LSD, but with, like, key differences. Not as visual and shit, but still a sense of distortion... I don't know what's been blowing up in Tampa, and mad people like to fuck on it."
"okay, yeah." I say, putting all the baggies in my pocket, "That'll be 120."
"Fez said he'd spot me."
"Fezco, don't spot anybody."
"Yeah, well, it's a post-rehab discount, so you should ask him." I say, pointing the middle finger at him, opening his door, and leaving.
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"Do you think my areolas look weird?" Dina says to Abby, "What the fuck, no?"
"Just the edges."
"Dina, they're fine," Abby says, taking a puff of the weed Cassie gives her.
"Fine, like, they're weird, kind of weird, or fine, like, nobody but me would ever notice what I would notice?"
"Fine, like, shut the fuck up, Dina," Cassie says, sitting up, grabbing her vape, and taking a puff. Dina scoffs, pulling up her t-shirt to cover her boobs.
"Hey ladies!" Jesse walks in. "Hey baby," Dina squeals, running to Jesse and hugging him. Abby cringes.
"Straight people, ew," she thinks to herself, looking at her phone. "Yo, you got out of rehab."
"Didn't she die?" Dina asks, and Abby shrugs.
"Yeah, I swear she died. I don't know, is Ellie coming to the party?" Jesse questions, to which Dina nods.
-
I get off my bike at home, slightly drugged up from the drugs I took earlier.
I walk into the house, softly shutting the door.
"Where were you?" My mother says, sitting at the table, Why the fuck is she up at 6 a.m.? You thought to yourself: "I went to eat," I lie. "What the fuck do you mean, you went to eat?"
"what?"
"what?" She mocks, "Don't walk away from me." She sits up from her seat, walking towards me as I walk towards my room. "You know what, y/n? I don't trust you."
"I don't know what you want me to say." It's true; I didn't know why she wanted me to say it. "I want you to tell me where you were," she says, walking quickly as I walk to my room.
"I just said I went to fucking eat!" I yell at her, "Don't you talk to me like that!" Grace says as I slam the door on her face. "Don't be slamming my doors around here."
"It was a fucking accident!" I yell out, holding my body in front of the door. "I don't care. You're not leaving this house until you take a drug test."
"I just peed!" I yell out, "Slam another door."
"Shit," I say, making my way to my bed, not knowing what to do. Every option I could do is unsafe as fuck.
Niacin, maybe. I don't know fuck, I think to myself, putting out my phone to look at the side effects.
Google
Side effects: skin flushing, extreme dizziness, vomiting, rapid heartbeat, and sometimes death.
Fuck, I can't.
"No drug site recommends doing this" I whisper to myself.
The other option is to get a non drug-addicted friend to do it for me.
About 20 minutes later, I show up at Dina's door, knocking.
"y/n!" Dina says, opening the door, smiling and hugging me, "I thought you died."
I laugh. "Can you do me a favor?" Uhm, I'm serious, bro."
"Sure, what is it, y/n?"
"Can you, uh, piss in this cup for me?" I whisper to her . "You're fucking with me, right?" She responds back, and I laugh and shrug.
Dina agrees to do it, and I enter her house to see Jesse and Abby.
"Sup Jesse," I say, fist bumping Jesse, then Abby.
"We thought you fucking died, bro. How was rehab?" Jesse says it with a genuine tone. "Yeah, it was good." I turn to Abby and ask, "How's football going?"
"Yeah, good. Thanks, uh, are you coming to that party tonight?" Abby asks, "Uhm, yeah, maybe."
"y/n" Dina grabs your attention, you move away from Jesse and Abby, and she swiftly hands you the bottle. "Here's that eyeliner."
"thank you"
-
I quietly climb through my window, grabbing my baggie of crushed cocaine, tipping some out onto my shelf, grabbing my 5 dollar note, rolling it up, and snorting a line.
"Argh," I groan, feeling it hit my nose. The same pain I've always experienced with snorting was still there—just muffled out. By this point, my nose was completely fucked, and I could hear the sound of the drugs eating away at my nose.
"Mom! I have to pee."
-
"I wish we could do this in a way that wasn't a complete invasion of my privacy." I say, cup in hand, struggling not to smile at her due to the drugs I had taken earlier on.
"Well, you lost your right to privacy after your overdose," your mom says, staring at you in the eyes.
"That was an accident." I smartly talk back, "Don't be flippy, y/n."
"Could you, at least?" Your mom turns around and says, "Thank you."
I sit down, and before "peeing" in the cup, I swiftly change it with Dina's urine as she talks. I wasn't listening to whatever the fuck she was saying... I was high as fuck, and I didn't care.
I gave her the urine sample, and she put the drug test in the container, and all of them came out negative. "I'm sorry for slamming the door earlier."
"it's okay. I forgive you. Come here." My mom says, pulling me in for a hug.
I guess... Like I said before, you get to choose who you want to be and how you want to be- the way the drugs cancelled out all my emotions was what I was looking for, no person, no nothing could compare to that feeling. Besides from drugs.
"I'm gonna stay at Dina's tonight" i say to which she agrees.
It's now 7PM, I don't know how the day went by so fast- but it did and it fucking sucked. I get a text from Ellie.
Ellie: Yo, noticed you left this morning you okay?
Me: yeah, I'm good bro. You alg?
Ellie: yep! Wanna come over tonight? Dont have to if you wanna go to the party instead
Me: I'll come over around like 11?
I find myself making my way to the party that Jesse, Dina, and Abby are going to.
Jesse and Dina have fucked off somewhere else, probably making out or fucking, and you find yourself next to Abby.
"How was rehab, y/n?" She says, breaking the tension, although I can barely hear her over the music, "Yeah, it was good!" I yell over the music.
I stand up, looking for the bathroom in an attempt to snort more, but people were already in the bathroom. "Shit," I think to myself, not paying attention to where I'm walking, accidentally bumping into this lady.
"fuck!" I yell. Looking at her, she looks like the girl Faz mentioned. "Hey, sorry." I retrace my steps.
"You're good; I'm, uh, I'm Jules," she says, and I smile, holding out my hand to shake hers. She accepts and shakes my hand.
She's got one of the most beautiful smiles you have ever seen; her smile is so bright it could light up an entire dark room, filled with nothing but sadness.
"I'm y/n" I introduce myself, to which we exchange numbers, and I make my way to Ellie's place, feeling overwhelmed from the party.
I knock on her door for Joel to answer; my pupils are dilated, and obviously I've taken some sort of drug.
"y/n... Hey, Ellie's in her room." I smile stupidly. These fucking drugs, man, I can't stop smiling . I swiftly walk past Joel and see Ellie. I smile at her, and she smiles back. "Dude, are you high?" She scoffs, "I thought... I thought you quit."
"I'm not high, Ellie, mania." I giggle; she obviously doesn't want to assume, so she wants to give me the benefit of the doubt.
"Are you coming back to college this month?" She questions. "Yeah, probably." The truth was, I didn't want to. But I knew I probably had to.
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I shall leave it at this due to how many words, etc. and idk if people will like this 😭😭
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cnovelartreblogs · 1 year
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C-Novels Available in English Translation
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A few weeks ago, a few of my danmei-loving friends and I got to talking about how much there is that we want to read, but that none of us have been very organized about keeping track of titles, fantranslation links, etc.
So, we decided to make a spreadsheet.
AND to combine every link we'd each separately stashed around on that spreadsheet.
The result is a list of 102 titles (currently 96 are danmei, 5 are baihe, and 1 is gen, reflecting our personal interests/preferences) with links to translations, some complete, some not. (as of 2/20/23)
Love C-Novels? Especially danmei? Looking for something to read? Check it out!
Some notes:
This is specifically for English translations from Chinese titles. Though some of the links do include other works (for example, some translators also do Japanese, and some Carrds list fantranslations in multiple languages), we're English speakers who are interested in Chinese novels, so we focused on that.
Currently, this is mostly basic information (titles, authors, links), with no summaries, genre tags, etc. We hope to ultimately expand it but that will be a lot of work and the information is already available at the provided NovelUpdates links, so we encourage you to use those.
We make no claims that this list is exhaustive; while the first sheet lists the resources we had collectively already gathered, there's a second sheet with things we know of and intend to add.
We'll try to keep links and such up-to-date but if you spot a problem please let me know!
Know of something that's not on the main list OR on the "to add" page? Please do send the info my way! Comments or ask box stuff will help.
Note that to actually access the fantranslations, you'll often need to take additional action to read them - you may need to request access, or get a password, etc. How to get this access is usually included on the pages.
Known official translations are listed. We will not link fantranslations for titles that are out officially in English. Don't send them. Don't ask for them. We won't help you pirate these titles.
(ADDED): I have also now added carrds for works that I could find carrds for, and added a third sheet, with carrds for authors. (I looked for every title and author and added the ones I could locate; Google asked if I was a bot at least 6 times lmao). Carrds are often good for summaries, information about the characters, and especially trigger warnings, so they're worth checking out! (ADDED MORE): I also added NovelUpdates links for all authors, so people can see a full list of their other works even if they don't have Carrds.
Don't forget to thank and respect translators, and honor their wishes! Without fantranslators, we wouldn't have all this amazing stuff to read in English, so THANK YOU FANTRANSLATORS!
GO FORTH, AND FIND YOUR NEW FAVORITE BOOK!
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absolutebl · 24 days
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This Week in BL - Taiwan has one show, but that's all they need
Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.
April 2024 Wk 1
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Ongoing Series - Thai
Two Worlds (Thurs IQIYI) ep 4 of 10 - I don’t say this often but I LOVE this love triangle. The longing gazes = chef's kiss. I like that we are finally getting flashbacks to Tai’s side of the love affaire. This show remains highly engaging. So pleased for MaxNat.  
Deep Night (Thurs iQiyi) ep 5 of 8 - More lesbians! Yay! Meanwhile, when our leads make up they make out! (Yes I’m proud of myself.) I think this might be BLs first rooftop sex scene. We’ve reached new heights, BLabies. (Yes I’m proud of that too.) Anygay, basically a soap opera at this point, I'm not thrilled but I don’t mind.
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"Do you apologize for being straight?"
City of Stars (Fri iQIYI) ep 10 of 12 - It was lovely. Very well done celebrity leaving the closet ep. Nice ensemble work too. Next week is doom! As expected. 
Only Boo! (Sun YouTube) ep 1 of 12 - New main couple for GMMTV in an idol romance about a boy who dances good and a food stand vendor. It’s fine but overly very pulp feeling for something from GMMTV. I'm a little concerned.
1000 Years Old (Thurs iQIYI) ep 8 of 12 - meh.
To Be Continued (Sat C3 Thailand grey) ep 7 of 8 - Never turned up on my usual sites. So will have to wait until next week. 
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Ongoing Series - Not Thai
Unknown (Taiwan Tues YouTube & Viki) ep 7 of 11 - Qian was, indeed, the one who couldn’t let go. This show is fucking fantastic. It's the best thing I'm watching right now by a mile.
Jazz for Two (Korea Gaga/grey) eps 3-8fin - The bully and the blue-haired drummer side pairing were great. I hated the father. Hated him so much. Our main tsundere seme was a bit too tsundere for me. I was v annoyed by the time he finally softened. I'm amused by all the ways they finagled boys kissin-but-not-kissing in the first half of this show. 2024's "pan around the back of the head" has now become a "dipping of the brolly." We did, however, eventually get an okay kiss.
Honestly?
This was basically what I wanted from Given and didn’t get. So I’m pleased. The music still wasn't great, but you can skip those bits. A solid enemies to lovers BL, where the sins of brothers' past haunts the present. Great optics, decent chemistry, and a tidy script even if tsundere characterization went a bit extreme in some cases. 8/10 RECOMMENDED trigger for suicide
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Love is Better the Second Time Around AKA Koi wo Suru nara Nidome ga Joto (Japan Weds Gaga) ep 5 of 6 - We got the past betrayal in detail and it was decently bad. Bitterness understood. Too soon to live together! The BL U-Haul strikes again. I do like their weird curry passive aggressive argument. This is an interesting show. Do I LOVE it? No. But I think I like it.
On a not-really-related note: adoption, including adult adoption, is actually pretty common in Japan (comparatively). It's often tied to business scionism.
My Strawberry Film (Japan Thurs Gaga) ep 8fin - It all turned out to be a tragic GL in the end. Not BL = not my problem. No rating. I will forget its existence right about… now. 
Love is like a Cat (Korea Mon Viki) eps 1-2 of 12 - Okay, weirdly kinky with the head scratching. Not much has happened and I’m not wild about what has. 
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It's done, ready to binge, but I suck
What Did You Eat Yesterday Season 2 AKA Kinou Nani Tabeta? Season 2 (Japan Gaga) 10 eps
It's airing but...
We Are (Weds GMMTV iQIYI) ep 1 of 16 - University ensemble BL featuring PondPhuwin, WinnySatang, AouBoom, MarcPawinPoon - basically the good kind of messy gay friendship group (so more My Engineer and less Only Friends). Looks a bit like the Kiss series but everyone is queer. I'm IN but I need my other computer and I'm traveling as usual. So I'll get caught up next week and probably won't regularly be able to watch this one.
Graduation Countdown (Taiwan YouTube) - It's too much for me to keep up with 2 minute verticals, I don't have that kind of TikTok endurance training.
A Secretly Love (Thai Sat WeTV grey) 10 eps - Completed. Worth watching?
Lady Boy Friends (Thai WeTV grey) 16 eps - reminds me a bit too much of Diary of Tootsies only high school. Not my thing. DNF unless it turns a corner and is truly amazing.
Kiseki Chapter 2 (Sun iQIYI) 6 eps - It’s so boring DNFed at 2.
Close Friend Season 3: Soju Bomb! (Weds iQIYI) 6 - The problem with situational comedy BL is it must be situational, comedic and a BL. This show gets 1 of 3 claims correct. 33% is not a passing grade. Dropped at 3.
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In the news
Takumi-kun Series 6: Nagai Nagai Monogatari is getting the undeserved honor of Furritsubs. Follow them for details. Tip 'em if you like 'em. (Will I watch it? Oh, probably. Damn it.)
Then Next Prince turned out to be a trailer only. Word on the webs is we will be lucky if we get it this year. It’s BL Princess Diaries. Jimmy has a new pairing (that boy from Night Dream) which is... interesting. All in all, this show does not look good. Pretty but not good.
Next Week Looks Like This:
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4/11 Gray Shelter AKA Gray Currents (Korea ????) 4 eps - SooHyuk is only just surviving and reunites with YoonDae, an old friend. They end up living together. One of the leads is played by Choco of Choco Milk Shake.
4/12 Living With Him AKA Kare no Iru Seikatsu (Japan Gaga) 10 eps - Kindly Ryota goes off to uni only to find his new roommate is his childhood bestie, Kazuhito. Kazuhito doesn’t have a girlfriend and Ryota tries to help him figure out why, they fall in love along the way. Same director as Old Fashion Cupcake.
Still to Come in April
4/18 At 25:00, in Alaska AKA 25 Ji, Akasaka de (Japan Gaga) 10 eps - Yuki lands his first starring role in a BL drama alongside superstar Asami (previously his senior at uni). Said superstar suggests they form a sham relationship until filming concludes. As they actually begin to fall in love, the spotlight begins to burn. I think I've seen this before (joke) and also the trailer doesn't inspire confidence.
4/26 My Stand-In (Thai iQIYI) 12 eps - adaptation of Chinese novel "Professional Body Double" by Shui Qiang Cheng. Stars Up (Lovely Writer) and Poom (Bake Me Please) directed by the same team as KP (not a recommendation IMHO - my biggest criticism of that show was the clashing directing styles). This one looks well complicated, lemme try: Joe is a stuntman for famous actor Tong. Joe falls in love with Ming but Ming sees Joe as nothing more than a Tong-replacement. After learning this horrible truth, Joe dies. Joe then wakes up in the body of another man also named Joe. He manages to rebuild the same life as before—with the same people eventually re-meeting Ming. Ming wants Joe back but Joe doesn't understand why. But Ming seems to know what's going on and wants to give him some kind of explanation.
I'm exhausted just trying to describe the plot.
Knock-Knock Boys (Thai WeTV) - 4 college friends conspire to help their friend lose his virginity. Familiar faces like Seng (yes, Billy's previous partner) and Best, news here.
Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.
NOTE: It looks like one of my personal favorites of last year Unintentional Love Story is getting a spin off!
THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS
See City of Stars & Unknown.
(Last week)
Streaming services are listed by how I (usually) watch, which is with a USA based IP, and often offset by a day because time zones are too much work.
The tag BLigade: @doorajar @solitaryandwandering @my-rose-tinted-glasses @babymbbatinygirl @babymbbatinygirl @isisanna-blog @mmastertheone @pickletrip @aliceisathome @urikawa-miyuki @tokillamonger @rocketturtle4 @blglplus @anythinggoesintheshire
If ya wanna be tagged each week leave a comment and I will add you to the template. Easy peesy.
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crownmemes · 5 months
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Domestic Bickering Sentences, Vol. 1
(Sentences for problems - big, small, serious, and light - between muses in a relationship. Adjust phrasing where needed)
"Flattery will get you nowhere."
"I'm telling you this because I don't want to have any secrets from you. I don't want there to be any lies between us."
"I can't find my dress shoes! What have you done with them?"
"It was a rehearsal! It's not like I missed the actual wedding!"
"When you didn't come home last night, I thought the worst."
"Don't you know yet? I could forgive you anything."
"Stop being sexy."
"And what is your excuse for not telling me this until now?"
"As usual, you're overreacting."
"And what time do you call this?"
"I don't like the people you're working with."
"Are you sulking?"
"Where were you last night?"
"You could have talked to me. That's what couples are supposed to do."
"I love you, but I also hate you sometimes."
"Are you jealous? It's most unbecoming."
"You're always at work!"
"That's a good story, but I've heard a lot of good stories lately."
"I did it because I love you!"
"Whatever excuse you have, it isn't good enough. It hasn't been good enough for weeks!"
"Don't be an arse, darling."
"It's not the first time, it won't be the last, but I'm in the doghouse again."
"You feel you can lie as freely to me as to yourself."
"Please, let's not make a long night feel any longer."
"Can we talk about this over dinner? Please?"
"My whole life doesn't revolve around you, you know."
"Are you cross with me?"
"I'm sorry. Please, can we start again?"
"How dare you! I'm your wife!"
"What is it you want me to understand? The secrets or the lies?"
"I'm not even going to grace that statement with a reply."
"Oh, stop looking so cross!"
"Are you ashamed of me?"
"Don't be so stubborn. You know I'm right."
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sheisburiedhere · 4 months
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The GraveRobber
Andrew graves x reader
Warning: cursing
Chapter 2
Chapter 1
Y/n who is tired of her shitty life not knowing it's about to get a lot more interesting
Y/n who had tried breaking down the door multiple times and been flirting and trading money for food from the guards
Y/n who intelligently hidden her food all over the apartment where your stupid boyfriend Jax left for work one day and never came back
Y/n who called that stupid Jax and been told that he can't come home till the quarantine over. He thinks you didn't hear that feminine giggle next to the phone. Your eyes widen as you slam it down with anger and grind your teeth digging your nails into your thighs.
I̸̡̛̳͌̉͋͐͒̍ ȟ̸̨̯̲̝̳͓͎̭͖͊̄̔̽̓̂̋̇̋̀̕̚͜â̸̙͐͑̌̿͛̽t̵̏͛̃̍́̈̚͜͝ẹ̷͓̺̰̽̍͛̉̐̔͋̓̚͜ ȟ̸̨̯̲̝̳͓͎̭͖͊̄̔̽̓̂̋̇̋̀̕̚͜i̵̢̢̡͚̩̞̥͕̜̻̫̩̐̈͘͜m̶̥͇͈̣̏͑̿͑̃̈͛̕͠, I̸̡̛̳͌̉͋͐͒̍'l̷̢̨̨̫̼͙̞͉̗͉̖̲̖̞̿̉l̷̢̨̨̫̼͙̞͉̗͉̖̲̖̞̿̉ ḟ̴̧̧̗͍͉͔̹͎̻͓̇͊̃̒̄̈̓̉̌̈͝͝i̵̢̢̡͚̩̞̥͕̜̻̫̩̐̈͘͜️ṉ̵͓̬͈̞̥̭̥̇̓̔͋d̴̨̢̤̗̦͚̺̭̤͙̹̃̕ ȟ̸̨̯̲̝̳͓͎̭͖͊̄̔̽̓̂̋̇̋̀̕̚͜i̵̢̢̡͚̩̞̥͕̜̻̫̩̐̈͘͜m̶̥͇͈̣̏͑̿͑̃̈͛̕͠ â̸̙͐͑̌̿͛̽️ṉ̵͓̬͈̞̥̭̥̇̓̔͋d̴̨̢̤̗̦͚̺̭̤͙̹̃̕-
Y/n who turns towards the noise at the balcony and see two emo looking ,hot topic intruders*rolls eyes*
The guy holds a cleaver as he looks at you nervously and the girl looks at you with a strange bitch look
Wait. You know that bitch look , you created that bitch look ,but of course yours is much better.
You stand up and cross your arms and turns your mouth up in disgust and stare her down completely ignoring the guy. And give her your branded bitch look.
How can such a pretty person make such and ugly face , who knows.
" Well are you both just gonna stare at me or you come to get something" you scowl only watching the girl while you both have a bitch face off.
Before the guy can speak the barks out "look here we just came for your food but we can kill you if you don't stand still and behave "
(Who the hell does she feel she is huh) you smile and begin to walk up to your kitchen cabinet as you glance at her about to blow a fuse.
"Are you dense didn't you hear me to stand still?!" She yells stomping here foot before being smacked in the face with a slice of American cheese and shutting up from the shock .
She turns to look at you with eyes that can kill . As you hand her a box filled of food ,could last for a week.
( how did she reach Infront of me so fast...) You turn to the guy not smiling but still feeling threatened by the cleaver as he still looks at the cheese on the girl's face and turn back to you nervously.
"You should put her on a leash," you say smiling at her as you realise that she doesn't like you close to guy as her face darkens .
You turn back to her ,"you look beautiful when you smile so you should keep doing that okay"
You feel the guy's eyes on you with a small smile as you glance back at him raising your eyebrows.(The hell is he looking at?)
"Now get the hell out I have things to do." You see the girl leave with a scowl and begins to walk away thinking she out of sight then skipping happily with the box of food across the wooden board that connects your balconies .Well isn't that cute.
"Thank you" the guy says breaking the silence. " It's no problem all of us are suffering" you say softly. "Not just for that...um I'm Andrew and that was my little sister Ashley" he says looking at you smiling showing his teeth. How adorable.
You both walk out to the balcony as he steps onto their balcony. "I'm Y/n" you say making sure he goes over safely.
"Thank you again Y/n , you don't know how much this means to us"
He waves as he enters his apartment. You walk back into yours and realise for the first time in a long time you smiled but here you are...alone again.
Maybe you meet Ashley and Andrew soon maybe you won't be alone again....
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L'appel du Vide pt.3
Pairing- Sully! family x Sully!reader
Summary- Someone from your family finally listens to you.
Pt.1 Pt.2 Pt.3
Warnings- attemptish suicide, talk of self harm, crying I think that's it if there more lmk
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It had been officially two weeks since that night. You've isolated yourself, from everyone and everything. Jake and Neytiri were beside themselves; they didn't know what to do. And your missing presence certainly hasn't gone unnoticed by your siblings, especially by your little brother Lo'ak. He was your partner in crime, your best friend. He noticed the way Jake and Neytiri would look over to your part of the mauri, like they knew something that they didn't, and he hated it, you told him everything, absolutely everything or at least he thought.
So here he is looking at your room curtain draped and an uneaten plate of your favorite food sitting in front of it. He looked over to his parents as if they were having a conversation with their eyes, he knew it was about you, but why? He was fed up with it. First his sister doesn't come out of her room, doesn't talk, barely eats, doesn't do anything anymore after an argument with your parents. Now that dinner was over Jake and Neytiri sent the kids off to bed but Lo'ak stayed and he would have his questions answered. "What should we do? She's been in her room for two weeks-" Jake's quiet whisper was cut off by his youngest son.
"What did you guys do to her?" Lo'ak uttered, scaring his parents a little. "Lo'ak what are you doing? Go to bed." Jake said, rubbing his tired eyes. "Not until you tell me what you did, what did you say?" He asked again. "What are you talking about?" Neytiri asked. "Y/N what did you say to her? I haven't seen her ever since you two argued with her so what did you do?" He asked for a third time, getting quickly irritated with his parents' lack of answers for him. Jake huffed, "We didn't do anything-" cut off for a second time. "She won't come out of her room, she doesn't do anything with anyone anymore so you must have done something." He said quite loudly. "Lo'ak there are some things about your sister that you wouldn't understand." Jake said quiet voice not to wake anyone up and this only deepened his confusion.
"Like what?" He asked and Jake gave a look to Neytiri and she only nodded. "Y/N she has- has some problems-" Lo'ak cut him off once again. "What problems?" He asked and Jake took a deep breath. "If you let me finish." He said and his son only shook his head up and down slowly. "She has problems with herself, she," he took a deep breath before saying what he was fixing to say. "She harms herself, you know all those scars on her body she did that because of these problems." Jake said and Lo'aks face fell. He swallowed the build of spit in his mouth before running his hands over his face.
"Okay so what do we do?" Lo'ak asked his parents who looked taken back. Lo'ak wanted to help his sister, the girl he's looked up to since you were children. "We don't know what to do." Jake confessed. "Okay we'll find something to help her." Lo'ak said before standing up and walking to his room. His parents just stood there stuck not knowing what to do.
As for you, you stood up from your cot, the cot that you hadn't left for the past two weeks, it called your name as you got up from it. All you wanted to do was sink into the bed and never get up. But you couldn't for your parents sake, and for your siblings sake. You open the curtain that acts like a window and carefully slips out from it. You thought you went unnoticed but you didn't, from his room Lo'ak saw you, as you ran to the beach and the moonlight hit your skin it used to help but now you still only felt despair.
He watched as you climbed into your ikran that was still awake, curious and a little worried he followed you carefully not making any sound.
He repeated the steps he saw you do, he climbed onto his ikran and followed you many meters behind you to make sure you didn't know he was there. It was a long trip where you stopped in the middle of the ocean where a tall boulder stood from the ocean. 'Go to the top' you instructed Amhel. She went to the top, you disconnected your queue and sent her on her way, you wouldn't need her.
Lo'ak watched from afar as you looked at the deep water from top of the boulder he watched and looked at you, you didn't look like you. He watched your steps get closer, you were on the edge, he couldn't watch anymore.
He landed quickly next to you and your eyes widened as you saw your little brother. You shake your head. Tears swelled in his eyes as he realized what you were fixing to do. "Do you wanna kill yourself?" He asked and your face expression broke, no one has asked you that before, you've never thought you'd have to tell anyone this.
"Don't do it." He spoke and the tears he tried so hard to keep in his eyes fell. "Please." His voice broke as he uttered the word and you realized he needed you, you would have left him alone.
You stepped back and walked over to him bringing him to a tight hold, "It's okay I won't leave you alone, I'm gonna be right here forever." You say to him and a little bit to yourself. He sniffled in your arms, wiping his tears and pulling you into a tighter hug.
After a while you sat down on the rock, it was time to actually talk to someone. And you noticed he didn't look at you differently, he only saw his sister and his sister needed help. "So why do you do it?" He asked, pointing to the scars. You didn't feel offended in the slightest you would have the same question if you were in his position. You took a deep breath.
"Sometimes I get this feeling like I'm dead and I'm just leaving someone else's life and the voices god the voices just don't such up and seeing the blood, feeling the pain makes me feel alive." You explained and he shook his head. He didn't completely understand but he would try. "And doing all those dangerous things, like cliff diving, getting into all those fights helped with that feeling too, but it wasn't enough." You explained as you held your knees to your chest. He put his hand on your knee, "Well find something, something that makes you feel alive that doesn't involve you getting hurt or hurting yourself." He said and you shook your head side to side.
"But what if I slip up I get these urges and sometimes I need to do it-" you cried out but Lo'ak shook his head. "We all slip up on stuff we aren't supposed to do, you're a person Y/N it will be okay." And those last four words he said made you smile, he was the only one right this time it would be okay now.
He helped you stand up and onto his ikran seeing as Amhel was already probably at the village.
You flew back and peace washed over you and your mind as you rode in the wind.
You hoped off first and helped him off and Jake and Neytiri were on the beach looking for what you suspect was you and him. You walked to them Lo'ak quickly behind them. "Y/N." Jake sighed. "Where were you?" Neytiri asked. It was clear she had been crying. You wiped her face and gave her a kiss on the cheek, "It's going to be okay mama." You say giving her a hug before walking to your room.
Your parents looked at Lo'ak who had a happy smile on his lips. "How did you do?" Jake asked. "I talked to her." He replied before walking to his room leaving his parents to go to his room.
No one knows what was said between you and Lo'ak, but it was clear you were happier and even if the thoughts haven't cleared you felt better. Although you and Lo'ak haven't found something yet, you felt alive.
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