#and chuck's an insecure little bastard

[apolloanddaphnis]

Poppies in October

Part III

Disclaimer: Lots of angst, mention of eating disorders, mentions of rape. Queer pairing and not proofread.

James POV

Everyone saw the breakup.

It was like a broom accident during a Quidditch match, ugly and horrible but you couldn't find it in yourself to look away.

Seeing Marlene McKinnon disrespect Lily Evans like that, seeing the proud look on Dorcas's face who was supposed to be a good friend of Lily's….Lily, who is kind to everyone who never says a bad thing to anyone, even when she was trying to be mean to me to soothe Marlene's insecurities, she still looked apologetic and secretly left me a box of red chuck Taylor's, a muggle shoe I love. My favorite shoes I wear everyday. How could anyone treat someone that sweet like that? 

I couldn't look away, Remus was fuming, he's so close to Lily and he ran over to Marlene fuming. I never liked Marlene, partially because of my crush on Lily but also because I know her well as my teammate.  She's a seeker and the youngest captain to ever be on Gryffindor. She's good, so fucking good. Like lightning, so fast you'd think you imagined seeing her, that's why we call her Bolt. It makes her cocky, she gets any girl she wants, likes to play the field, not just Quidditch. She's strong and has a masculine beauty, and treated Lily like she was replaceable.

Now they're over. I don't know where Lily went that night but she was gone for a long time, didn't come back until 3, and strangely didn't alert anyone she missed curfew. Lily has her secrets and I understand that better than anyone, her talents surpass her just making high marks.

I stayed up until she made it safe, and when she returned she wasn't crying anymore.

The next day was weird.

Regulus Black was acting so strange in the bathroom.

He snapped at me, stared at me, and made a comment about my lip gloss.

I think he found me attractive and didn't like it.

I'm aware of how handsome I am. Tall and lean with svelte muscles, ideal for being a chaser, like a cheetah almost. I tried out for seeker but Marlene just happened to be better.

My olive skin tans beautifully, I'm grateful for my mother's Persian heritage. I have high cheekbones and lips attractively full for it that naturally come in a red raspberry color, which compliments my hooded amber-cognac colored eyes. Girls envy my lashes and my shoulder length black ringlets that are cut in a wolf cut.

It didn't surprise me that my best friend's little brother checked me out, but it did surprise me that I liked it….a lot.

When did he get so hot?

I swore off Slytherins, not only because most of them are junior death eaters, but also because I intimately understand what happens when you get too close to one.

I wish I didn't lose my virginity to Severus, I wish it was my choice to lose it. But he seemed so shy at first, I fell for the backstory, his life isn't the easiest. But that was no excuse…I took a deep breath, I won't waste any tears on that slimy little bastard, not anymore.

But Regulus, he is so…Merlin, I want to get down on my knees and suck him off in the stall.

But he's Sirius's little brother, and Sirius warned me about him. I know how unsympathetic Slytherins are, how they prioritize duty and expectation over what's right. Besides he seemed very upset that he found me attractive anyway, Snape probably told him all about how I was whore for him.

Well if he believes that he can go fuck himself. 

I finished up fixing my makeup, I love this lip gloss from Rusalka Budapest Cosmetics, it's cherry red and called Dragoness, and the enchanted lip gloss never smudge or come off unless you utter a cleaning charming, and it tastes like cherries jubilee and amaretto. I fluffed my curls and sprayed on my perfume called Enchantress before getting up from my vanity table. "Padfoot I know you stole my other lip gloss."

He was hitching his skirt higher, he got away with wearing the Hogwarts uniform skirt by calling it a kilt claiming his Scottish heritage from his gross father's side, and yes he did say gross to McGonagall.  Well one Scot to another, he got the approval. "Which one?" He asked as he bent over our shared vanity to fluffy his mid back long, dark hair. He smells good, like he stole Mary's gardenia perfume good. Sirius Black is a major clepto, but I love the slag. Even though he is prettier than me.

Someone else seems to love him too, more than brotherly bond. I watched Remus from the bed, reading his thriller novel, jaw clenching as he watched our friend parade around in school girl skirts. I smirked, they're so into each other, when will they both admit it?

I plopped down next to Remus and sighed playfully, faking looking properly annoyed. "What are you reading, Mooney?"

"Have a look, you nosy little tosser." He smiled and handed me a muggle Novel called A Clockwork Orange. I prefer muggle writers, not having the genuine knowledge of the magical world makes you more imaginative. "Can I read it when you're done? What's it about?"

"No abso-fookin- no, and don't give me those doe eyes, you always steal my books and n'er give them back, where is 1984?"

I looked down with a suspicious smile and Remus snatched his book with the screaming mouth and fire back. "Exactly, no Prongs I'm dead serious, every time you're gaggin' for one o' me books- one of my books…no!"

Remus is from Manchester, he's got a strong Mancunian accent that he tries to get rid of to sound proper for you know who, but when he gets comfortable and upset he slips in. 

"But Mooney!"

"Touch it and I'll give you a right hook in the newtons!"

"Bitch, what does that even mean?" I laughed.

He tossed a pillow at me with his face turning red. "Are you going to eat tonight, Pads?" Remus asked, trying to sound casual, but his dark eyes filled with concern. If Sirius thinks he can get anything pass that boy he's dreaming.

"I do eat mum." Sirius bit back as he added his tenth coat of mascara .

"Hekate, I do hope I'm not Walburga, I swear I shaved this morning." Remus teased.

I saw Sirius's red lipped smile in the mirror. "I had salad and soup."

"S'not enough. You need protein, you love the smoked honey chicken rotisserie. You love the hot cross rolls and the Yorkie pudding and–"

"All things that make me look like a right cow."

I frowned, I noticed Sirius had been eating less but I didn't realize how far it's gotten. Before I could respond to the madness, Remus cut in. "Dammit, Sirius-"

"Let's drop it, yeah? Don't worry Moonman, pumpkin soup has plenty of carbs." He didn't let any of us respond, just walked out just like that.

Peter then entered and looked around at us as he read the tension. "What did I miss?"

With a growl of frustration I never seen on my mature friend, he got up and shoved past Peter so hard he fell to the ground, his white-blue eyes widened in fright at Remus' lethal snarl that is usually reserved just for one night a month. "Everything as usual, you're never here when it matters!" He raged before leaving the dorms with a thunderous slamming of the door.

I rushed over to help Peter up. "He didn't mean it sweetheart, he's just worried about Padfoot that's all."

Peter glared at the door. "He's always worried JUST about Padfoot, like they're bloody married or something, I expect rough behavior from his kind though." He muttered Darkly.

My blood froze, I couldn't believe what one of my closest friends just said. "Peter, what did you say that for what exactly did you mean by his kind?" I asked weakly.

My friend looked worried before composing himself. "Just he's, just an unfunny joke. I'm sorry Prongs I didn't mean it." He clung to my tie and gently stroked it looking into my eyes. "I didn't mean it, honest." He said softly and breathy. 

Of course he didn't, he's little Wormy, so I hugged him close. "It's okay Wormy, I know you're just hurt, it's okay. Now, let's go eat. I'm starving!" We headed down together.

On our way to the Great Hall, Peter excused himself to use the loo, I waited outside of it. I'm the kind of friend that accompanies you on all bathroom trips, it's an absolute must. To pass time, I looked at the map, and it looked like Xenophilius and Pandora had been in that broom closet far too long. 

Suddenly I saw none other than the footsteps of Regulus Arcturus Black approaching. I folded the map away quickly and tucked it into the pocket of my robe. I spun around to look unsurprised at the walking talking personification of sex. I wanted to lick his jawline and find out what that big bulge in his pants really looks like. And those curls… I leaned against the wall and bit my lip, fluttering my lashes.  "Working your corner, Potter?"

I laughed humorlessly before smiling flirtatiously and played with his silver and emerald tie. "Why, interested in the price?"

His nostrils flared and pupils dilated, I smirked as he looked down at my red painted nails. "You can't have me like you've HAD everyone else Potter! You can't have everybody!"

I flinched, I thought I saw a twinge of regret in his eyes but I probably imagined it.

Oh no, no, no…he knows, Snape told him! That evil little snake, that cruel pathetic little imp! I tried my best to push back those tears but it was so hard. "No, I– I'm– what did he tell you?" I was shaking.

His cruel snarl disappeared, his silver-green eyes widened. "James? James, calm down, breathe, who told me what?" He gently moved closer. 

"Snape! I swear it wasn't like how he said I swear!"

His eyebrows furrowed and he gently took my hands to bring me back. "James focus right now" his voice was stern but tender and soft. "James, I need you to focus, this is very important, okay?"

I sniffled and looked at him with hesitancy, I felt so small even though I was taller. 

The way Regulus looked at me right now made me want to cry. He gently stroked my hand and I could breathe a bit. He smells nice and snuggly like snow, wintergreen, and hot chocolate, he smells like Christmas and the warm flames from a fireplace. His long fingers stroked my chin and I looked down into his eyes. "James, did Severus make you…did he force you–" he choked the last part out.

I didn't want to remember, I didn't want to think of how helpless I was. I wanted to forget, he said it was all my fault for being so handsome and cocky, I needed to be put into my place.

I crumpled into his arms and his arms were around me. He was surprisingly strong and he pulled me under an alcove.  I buried my face in his chest, if he wasn't wearing a jumper I'd soak his shirt. He didn't make fun of me, just stroked my hair and eventually rubbed the nape of my neck, a weak spot I wasn't even aware I had.

I was embarrassed by the pathetic little noise I made but all I could do was nuzzle more. "You're like a puppy Potter." He remarked softly, he rubbed behind my ear and I moaned.

"What, no dirty retort?"

I know he was joking but I still couldn't help but whimper with tears. "Fuck, James I didn't mean it." He lifted my face from his jumper and gingerly wiped away the tears. He stared down into my eyes with such a soft look I didn't even know I needed so badly.  "You are not dirty, Snape is…fuck, there's been too much tears this week." He stroked more tears away and I leaned into his touch, I watched his  eyes lowered to my lips and his Adam's apple bobbed. 

I leaned forward and kissed him, his hand lowered to my back before pulling away and I felt cold without his lips on mine. "I'm not going to take advantage of you."

"You aren't, you're making it better."

He pressed his forehead against mine and sighed. "Let's go to the hall, you need to eat." With that he had us stand up and when we walked in together, no one could look away, especially Lily Evans.

@meetmyothersouls @sufferingstarlight

#timothee chamalet #timothée chalamet #james potter #james x lily x regulus #regulily #regulus black #james x regulus #lily evans

[sweeney-bell]

Mentor chucky x Reader

Wow, guess who’s actually writing again! I've actually got a lot of fics saved in my drafts but insecurities Anyway...Thanks for reading! Sorry in advance for any weird spacing/ grammatical errors. To be honest I have no idea where I wanted to go with this so it's a bit messy <3

Y/n —> your name

You had been dreading coming back to Hackensack for what feels like an eternity, truthfully it had only been a couple days since your last visit but having to pack up the rest of your recently deceased grandmother's house was not something you were looking forward to. You let out another sigh as you pulled into the driveway. As you walked up the porch steps barely being able to hold all your packing essentials in your hand you opened the front door. Walking in felt off, the once happy warm feeling in the air was now stale. You felt uncomfortable like you were invading someone else’s home but that just gave you the incentive to hurry it up. Thinking of a plan on how to pack everything up quickly you decided to start off in your grandmother's room

“Nope! No! Nope! Fuck this! And fuck you!” Y/n shouted out at the good guy doll wallowing in pain on the floor. They looked terrified mixed with some sort of confusion . “What the fuckkkkk”

“Shut the hell up. God you almost break my fucking head open now you won’t stop whining!” The doll finally stood back up looking pissed off as he ‘dusted off’ his overalls. “ all I said was hi and you fucking kick me across the damn room” Y/n opened their mouth but closed it as no words seem to come out, they were gapping like a fish. As the doll approached them, Y/n started to back up against the doll. Being unable to speak they just started

Chucky continued “Wait a fucking second” he squinted his eyes as if he was trying to figure you out. “Are you related to that old broad?”. With a quick nod, you ended up rambling about the last hour giving way too many details. The doll just sighed shaking his head as he muttered "I'm going to regret this big time"

Sooo here you are a couple weeks later, still staying in your grandmother's house with this damn doll. Surprising yourself and even Chucky after one last comical screaming fit between you and him. You ended up just going along with it and helping him.

After getting to know him you'd silently tease yourself about being scared of him. He's not scary at all just a damn gremlin... well a fast, cursing, quick to anger gremlin but eh it's Chucky what's the worst he could.

For some reason, Chucky constantly wanted to be at your side. It really bugged you at first. Didn't matter where you went Chucky had to come. Whenever you brought it up he'd have two reactions either straight up flip you off and yell curses at you or say ts cause he doesn't want you going to the cops; wanting to keep an eye on you.

Before you had your first kill every little inconvenience this man will randomly pull out an oversized knife from his overalls (every time you just look over like "Chucky...how...where did that come from") and just slowly slide it over and just whistling. Doesn't matter what it was he just wanted you to do it. Delivery guy forgot your utensils? "y/n skin the bastard". Lady at the store staring at you funny for carrying him around "Y/n... I've got a knife in my overalls just chuck it at her and book it out of the store". "Chucky no' "Chucky yes"

But god the moment you actually snapped and killed your first guy my man loses his mind. First, he's pissed he wasn't there to see it. "What the hell kid?!?! I wanted to see your first time and give pointers!" Second, he needs every detail. Why did you decide to kill this one? Was it fun? Was it merciful? Or was it like some intense shit where they wouldn't be able to identify him?

#slasher x reader #charles lee ray #charles lee ray x reader #chucky x reader #childs play #horror x reader #chucky tv series #slasher movies #horror

[aurumacadicus]

Sgsdhgksjgs y’all a no-powers concept:

Sam is used to Bucky razzing him. It’s basically the core of their relationship. It’s not like he doesn’t give as good as he gets, and he secretly enjoys every new insult that Bucky comes up with. (His favorite so far is when he blue-shelled Bucky in Mario Kart and Bucky screamed that he was a bubble-headed blue vested bastard with no taste and less intelligence. It had honestly been beautiful.)

So he’s very confused when Bucky comes storming into the apartment one day snarling, “Sam is the most beautiful, charming, smart man I’ve ever met, and you can go fuck yourself.”

“Babe,” Sam says, stunned, after Bucky has hung up and chucked his phone across the room. “What the fuck?”

“Can you believe that Steve thinks that he has a better boyfriend than me?!” Bucky exclaims angrily.

Sam blinks at him. “Ste--Steve? Your best friend Steve? Like-your-brother Steve? That Steve?”

“He started dating some twink and he thinks he’s hot shit,” Bucky complains. “He’s bringing him to our meeting tonight.”

“Maybe he wants support so he doesn’t feel awkward meeting his brother-friend’s long-term boyfriend after just being discharged from the army,” Sam says slowly.

“You’re not fucking intimidating!” Bucky bursts out, then pauses, frowning. “Well. Maybe when I eat the last of your Jell-O cups and forget to buy more. I didn’t know an empty container could be so scary.”

“Stop eating my fucking Jell-O cups. You don’t even like lime,” Sam retorts. “Anything we should know about your friend’s boyfriend?

“They met on base, their relationship is relatively new, and I need to be nice,” Bucky mutters petulantly.

Sam nods a little. That’s the word all of Bucky’s friends had come up with to say ‘we know your love language is making fun of people but this person is sensitive and needs to be eased into it.’ “So what was with your impassioned speech about how great I am then?”

“He told me that his boyfriend was pretty hot stuff and not to freak out when I met him,” Bucky thunders, incensed again. “As if I’m not already dating the world’s most excellent specimen of a man!”

“Thanks, babe. I think you’re cool too,” Sam says. “Maybe don’t be so aggressive in person.”

Bucky sucks in a deep breath, trying to calm himself down. “I’ll try,” he mutters. “‘Don’t freak out when you meet him, Buck,’ can’t fuckin’ believe the audacity. Just ‘cause I’m a flirt doesn’t mean I’m out for everyone’s boyfriend. Asshole.”

“It’s normal to be insecure in a new relationship,” Sam reminds him. “Steve isn’t normally like this, right?”

Bucky crosses his arms petulantly, then sighs in defeat. “No. Not really.”

“See? He’s just worried. You’re a handsome, charismatic guy. If I wasn’t so sure no one else could stand your dumbass long-term, I might be a little insecure too,” Sam adds. “But I’m sure. You cry every time you get drunk and start swiping through Natasha’s Instagram.”

“She finds so many cats!” Bucky answers defensively.

.-.

Steve stands up to pull Bucky into a hug, showing that the person left in the booth is Tony fucking Stark. “You called Tony Stark a twink?!” Sam sputters before anyone else can say anything.

“You called my boyfriend a twink?!” Steve exclaims, offended, and the hug he’d been going for turns into a chokehold.

“Fuck,” Bucky yelps, before dragging Steve down to the floor with a snarl. Sam and Tony watch, silent, as they begin wrestling.

Then Tony looks up at Sam. Somehow he seems delighted. “I pass for a twink?”

Sam gives him the courtesy of a long onceover before saying, “I mean. Not really. With the beard and all.”

“Oh,” Tony says, sagging in disappointment. “Okay.”

“Sorry,” Sam replies, unable to help feeling guilty for some reason. “If it helps, you grew out of your twink phase beautifully.”

Tony brightens again. “Oh! Thank you!”

“I’m guessing Steve told Bucky not to freak out because you’re Tony Stark and not because Bucky can’t help but be a flirt,” Sam surmises.

“Yeah,” Tony answers. “Most people tend to freak out when they see me in person and I wanted to make a good first impression, since he’s Steve’s best friend.” He frowns, uncertain. “Um. Was this a bad impression? And... should we stop them?”

Sam looks over at Steve and Bucky, who are still wrestling on the ground, then looks back at Tony. “I think it’s a perfectly fine impression. And no, I figure I deserve this for the bubble-headed insult he gave me after I blue-shelled him.”

“Excellent. I ordered a pitcher of margaritas,” Tony says, pouring him a glass. “Have a seat. You tell me stories about Bucky being a dumbass, and I’ll tell you stories about Steve being a dumbass.”

“Deal,” Sam says, sitting down across from him. “I have a lot. Where should I start?”

.-.

Sam and Tony get along thick as thieves and Bucky and Steve are miserable about it because suddenly their boyfriends know about all the stupid shit they got up to before and in the army. Somehow they aren’t prepared for the absolutely appalled expressions they receive about the cyclone and then the ziplining stories.

#ideas #winterfalcon #stony #sam/bucky #tony/steve #crack

[me4ml]

Why don't you like Maribat? Why do you think it's a spite or salt ship?

This is presumably because of my Adrigaminette post or the whole Maribat being on the ship list thing.

Quick disclaimer: if you read/ship/write/like Maribat, cool! This is not an attack. This is me answering why I, personally, do not like it. It’s tagged anti, and salt, so it should be filtered. Please don’t harass me over it.

Another note before we start: a lot of what I’m about to write is based on what I’ve read, fic wise or meta, and I blocked off the Maribat tag and fandom a long time ago. It may have changed over there-I doubt it, and I have zero desire to go and look-but this is based on what I’ve seen and read about.

There are, principally, three reasons I can’t stand Maribat, why I think it’s a spite/salt ship.

1). I don’t like Damian Wayne.

2). I don’t like how Damian and the DCU are written in Maribat.

3). Maribat is a mutated salt fic.

If you want to see my reasons why, the rest is under the read more.

1). I don’t like Damian Wayne.

Damian’s not just my least favorite Robin, ranking behind any of the others who have born the name. He’s my least favorite Batfam sidekick overall.

Part of this is his introduction, where he’s a violent, murderous, arrogant, entitled, snotty little brat of a thug. Lest we forget, one of his first acts is to go out, kill a guy, cut off his head, stuff a grenade into the decapitated head’s mouth, and try to blow up Tim. This is his introduction! There are a number of other occasions, including how he treats Jon, his best friend, and the rest of his siblings.

Another part is that he believes that he deserves to be Robin simply because he’s Bruce’s son, and therefore has the blood right to be Robin, to become Batman, and damn anyone else, who are all pretenders. Doesn’t matter that those characters might have a right to become Robin, or the future Batman, he’s the bio son, he deserves it!

Additionally, Damian feels.....not unnecessary, but repetitive, in his actions/characterization. There are other characters who can perform pretty much the same way for whatever storyline is necessary, without including Damian.

Trained by an abusive family to be the best, as an assassin and warrior? Cassandra.

A killer who breaks the main rule of his mentor, which causes tension and strain in the family? Jason.

Incredibly intelligent and talented? Tim.

Damian isn’t unique in what he does, and while that can make him an interesting character, it can also make the focus on him unnecessary.

As well, so much of Damian’s actions and motivations feels like he gets away with stuff, in-universe, because he’s Bruce’s biological son, and so Bruce gives him too much slack, and out-universe, because the writers let him/the fans will defend him. He gets woobified, or leather pantsed. Which leads to:

2). I don’t like how Damian and the DCU are written for Maribat.

For all his (numerous) faults, when written well, Damian can be an interesting character. For example: How does he deal with being deeply insecure? By putting on a mask of arrogance and overconfidence.

Some more examples: How does Damian act like an actual child, when he’s never had a childhood? How can he be a hero, if he’s been trained to be a killer? Can he ever catch up to his siblings, or will he feel like they’re always better than him?

Damian’s sense of being Batman’s son, of being the heir to the Cowl, slams right up against the idea of the Batfam: that there are people who have just as much of a right to call Batman their father/father figure, people who are just as talented and skilled and capable as Damian himself is, if not more. Watching Damian develop, when he’s written right, is actually enjoyable; mainly because when it’s done right, it shows Damian actually progressing and growing, becoming more of a person, with friends and interests. Most times, seeing Damian with his pets can be adorable, same with when he hangs out with Jon.

Is he still a brat? Still sometimes a bit too much of a Demon, an al-Ghul? Yes, but that’s always going to be part of him, and as long as he’s shown to try and grow, or gets called out on that, it’s less of an issue (There’s a completely different rant to be written about how DC likes to chuck character development or backstory into the trash when it suits them for a new run. Damian gets hit with this, as does Tim, or they get handed the idiot/conflict ball, but not the space for it).

Maribat hurls this all out the window. Damian’s bad traits are all “fixed” offscreen-he’s developed, matured, gotten better, whatever you want to call it. It’s basically a writer’s hand wave to make Damian into the character who will be the lead of the story, perfectly suited for his main role of being Marinette’s boyfriend and utterly devoted to her every whim and will. He’s enchanted by her at first glimpse, and defends her against everyone who hates her, because no one can understand her like he can!

Uh, what? This is not Damian Wayne. Even at his best, he’s no broody boy, pulled from his “dark path” by the love of a gentle girl. He’s a Jerk with a Heart of Gold-emphasis on the Jerk. There’s a reason his nickname usually involves “Demon.” Is Damian trying to get better? Yes. But even then, he’s not the type to immediately fall in love. He takes a while to warm up to people, for them to earn his trust, and Marinette would not be like that?

Let’s say that Robin is in Paris for a case, he runs into Ladybug and Chat, and after they explains what’s going on, Robin gives them a stare over his mask, and goes “TT! What a worthless hero, I would have caught him already.” LB and Chat would probably want to deck him, and that’s before he keeps talking.

Same with if Damian transfers to the class, or they meet on a field trip to Gotham. Damian’s not gonna care about some random French teenagers on a tour, or if he was transferred he’s gonna be trying to figure out why his father sent him to Paris, and be focused on the mission, not making friends.

Of all of the Robins, the ones that would be the most likely to capture Marinette’s interest would be Dick or Tim, not Damian. He would remind her too much of Chloe, as Damian, and as Robin, he would be dismissive of Ladybug’s abilities, which would absolutely piss her, and Chat Noir, off.

In characters that aren’t Damian, no one seems to be written properly over in Maribatland. One huge example is that Marinette is so beloved, so pure, that she can make any character fall in love with her, and reform by her pure goodness, including a fic where the Joker-THE JOKER!-becomes her “Uncle J,” and pranks Lila on her behalf.

Uh-huh. Sure. Completely and totally something that one of the biggest, most sadistic twisted, notorious villains in pop culture would do. Maribat winds up worshipping the ground that Marinette walks on, cause she’s “Teh best evar!”

Which then leads to my third and final point:

3). The whole Maribat concept is a mutated salt fic.

Most of the themes you’ll find in Maribat? You will find in nearly every salt fic.

Maybe my biggest issue with the whole Maribat idea is that it doesn’t feel like a proper crossover, which, at their best, explore how characters from one universe and their rules would interact with characters from another universe, and the rules of that one. Putting ML and DC together is a rich opportunity to play with concepts in both worlds!

And yet, it’s mainly used to bash ML characters who the writers despise, predominantly Adrien, Alya, and Lila, with members of the class thrown in depending on feeling, and potentially even Marinette’s parents! The only “good” ML characters are the ones who are on Marinette’s side, usually Luka, Kagami, a Chloe who for some reason has been redeemed and is now Marinette’s best friend, and whatever members of the class the writer decides to throw in there.

You’ll notice it’s not called “MiracuBat”, or LadyBat and Bat Noir-it’s MariBat. It’s meant as a focus on Marinette, making her-the hero of the Miraculous Ladybug franchise, someone in-story in story who is incredibly smart and talented and the leader of her team, future Guardian-even more awesome.....by beating down everyone else around her.

Marinette is simultaneously treated as an beaten-up, beaten-down walked-on carpet, and the best person to ever exist ever, go who only needs a group of new, different, better people to recognize that and save her from the clutches of those greedy and ungrateful assholes! That doesn’t include the fics where she’s the unknown child of a superhero or supervillain, making her even more special.

It’s Chameleon salt, class salt, with pointy ears and a cape on.

Some specific examples.

Adrien: Adrien is a spineless doormat who prioritizes Lila over Marinette, or an entitled bastard sexual harasser, only fixated on Ladybug, or even both. Sometimes it’ll get worse, as Adrien will threaten or abandon Marinette if she steps off of his “high road,” and Chat will be a budding rapist, stalking or capturing Marinette after he’s learned she’s Ladybug, while ignoring her prior to that. He will, of course, have his ring stripped and handed off to Damian, who is the “true” soul of Destruction and so therefore a “perfect match” to Marinette’s Creation soul. Occasionally it will be Jason, or Tim, or Dick, but the key thing is that it’s not Adrien!

While Damian’s issues are magically fixed, Adrien gets no such courtesy. Adrien has been abused, just like Damian, and while Damian’s abuse is more extensive and extreme, abuse is abuse. If anything, if Damian met Adrien, he would probably see another abused kid, and want to be his friend/have his “adopt stray person!” Instincts go off. I can much more imagine Damian dragging a bewildered Adrien into the Batcave and yelling “Father I’ve found another one for you to adopt!” than I can Damian immediately hating Adrien, or Chat, simply for breathing.

We never see Clark taking Adrien under his wing, or Bruce, or any of the other Batfam; nor any of the other Justice Leaguers. We never see Selina try to fight Bruce over the kid, because he’s cat-themed, and Selina can train him, this one’s hers Bat, get off!

Adrien’s never treated as a kid, or given actual development. A major complaint among salters is that Adrien is treated as perfect and never develops, and in fic, rather than developing him, Adrien either remains static, with his flaws narratively exploded, or is developed negatively. He’s there to be beaten up on and punished by the writers, if not actually physically beaten up by characters in the fic.

Alya: the not-so-good friend, the cheap excuse for a journalist, the awful person who abandons Marinette for Lila and her “connections.” Never mind that Alya was Marinette’s friend from the beginning, or that Marinette’s chosen her multiple times for a Miraculous. One instance of questioning Marinette about Lila, and Alya’s a backstabbing bitch.

Maribat treats Alya as neglectful, bossy, domineering and submissive at the same time to Marinette and Lila respectively, and as a journalist, the worst of the worst. She’s played as a two-bit paparazzo, and once again, the DCU is used to punish her. We don’t see Alya get mentored by Lois or Clark-indeed, if they notice her, it’s with disdain or disappointment. Often, they’re crushing her under their heel, calling her not only a bad journalist, but a bad friend/person. This forgetting, of course, that Alya runs her blog as a hobby so far, she’s only a teenager, and that she’s had Marinette’s back against Chloe and Lila.

The Class: the dupes or allies as needed. Class salt levels depend on what the writer needs. If they’re pro-class, they’re all on Marinette’s side, aside from Alya Adrien and Lila. Chloe, for some ungodly reason, is “redeemed” nigh instantaneously, and often will become Marinette’s best friend, if that isn’t Kagami already. Kagami will drop Adrien like a wet tissue, never trying to reconcile him with the clas, or encourage him to stand up for himself, or if she does, Adrien, of course, will not listen.

If the writer is anti-class, whoo boy. Openly mentally, emotionally, physically abusive to Marinette, the worst gang of people you would ever have the displeasure of meeting, they all need to be in Arkham.

We never see any of the class make friends with the Batfam, the Titans, Young Justice-unless they’re on Marinette’s side, of course. There’s no Alix stopping Selina at the Louvre, for instance, or Max hanging out with Babs. It’s all based on how Marinette is treated as to whether or not the class is portrayed as being worse than the worst of the Rogues Gallery.

Wrapping it all up, Maribat has made me dislike the entire concept of a DC/ML crossover.

Even if someone had written an non-salt, in-character crossover, I don’t know if I would read it, simply because the well has been that poisoned.

#anti maribat #anti maridami #anti daminette #maribat salt #daminette salt #maridami salt #anti damian wayne #Damian Wayne salt #ml fandom salt #anonymous #ask answered #long post

[brokutosan]

Title. Oikawa Toruu Is Not A Genius, But He Is A Jackass

Pairings. Oikawa Toruu x Fem!Reader

Summary. In which Oikawa doesn’t always tell his girlfriend things. She finds out anyways.

Warnings. Contains manga spoliers! Oikawa’s inferiority complex is mentioned a lot, as well as his anxieties over it. The title and the summary are misleading, sorry. This is a fluffy imagine (sort of).

“Honey, I’m home!” Oikawa Toruu calls out to a silent apartment. Also, it’s three in the morning, but he’s Oikawa Toruu and Oikawa Toruu could care less if he’s bothering the whole building, so long as he could finally take her in his embrace again (he’s up for a treat when she does wake up though, and not the one he’s expecting).

Oikawa takes note of the subtle changes from when he was last here. For instance, the old hand-me-down couch they got from his mom is replaced by a new, clean, and sleek black couch. There’s also some new additions of little knick knacks here and there, but it still felt like home to him. Kicking off his worn out sneakers by the door, not even bothering to check if it knocked over some of her things, Oikawa heads straight to the bedroom, where he’s welcomed by her sleeping form.

She’s dressed in one of his old Seijoh shirt along with white shorts and her arms are clinging onto a pillow. Oikawa gushes at the sight before snapping a quick picture and taking slow, careful, steps towards the bed.

“If you were gonna sneak around you shouldn’t have announced to the whole fucking neighborhood you were home.” She snorts with her eyes still closed. Oikawa stops dead in his tracks like a deer caught in headlights and remains frozen as if not moving would erase his presence all together.

“Hmph!” Oikawa lets out as his face catches a pillow that was chucked at him by his still sleeping girlfriend. “Nice throw babe. Ever thought of a career switch? I can see you making it big in softball.”

“Stop dicking around and just come here.” She mumbles. Oikawa smiles at the adorable sound of her sleep-induced voice. “As you wish my darling.” He says before throwing all his weight onto her sleeping form.

“Toruu, you jackass!” Oikawa lets out a boisterous laugh at her feeble attempts of freeing herself from his arms. The more she wiggles the tighter his hold gets, before she gives in to his embrace.

“I missed you so much.” Oikawa mumbles into her hair once they’ve settled in. He flips them over so they’re now laying side by side, with one arm slung over her form rubbing soothing circles on her back and the other placed under her head.

“Sorry I couldn’t pick you up from the airport. My boss wouldn’t push back the deadline.” Oikawa shakes his head ‘no’ and mumbles out, “It’s fine. This makes up for it.”

“Good, cus you’ll feel my wrath tomorrow morning.” Oikawa gulps down, knowing she’s totally serious.

-

Oikawa wakes up after the first good night’s sleep he’s had in a few months to an empty bed. He catches a whiff of miso soup which leads him into the kitchen, to a sight he’s been missing after all those years in Argentina.

Hunched over the stove is his girlfriend, clad in an oversized t-shirt while mixing something in the pot. The sight makes him smile, before her voice snaps him out of his daydream. “Oi, don’t just stand there, go set the table.” He salutes and scoops up two bowls of rice and places them down on the table alongside various side dishes.

Y/N sets down the pot she was stirring on the stove, letting Oikawa catch another whiff of her familiar cooking. “Thank you for the meal.” He says with a huge smile on his face. Y/N sits down across from him on table, where she then proceeds to stare him down.

The sight reminds Oikawa of his mom, who’s an expert at chastising him with looks alone. She bites down on a spoonful of rice, not once breaking eye contact with him. Oikawa racks his head for anything that he could’ve done wrong to deserve this mental beating. Their anniversary? No, it’s coming up in two months. Her birthday? Like Oikawa could ever forget. Then -

“Mind telling me why exactly you’re here on a vacation?” Oikawa feels the hairs at the back of his neck shoot up. Of course he couldn’t. If she found out he got sent home from over exerting himself again, she’ll rip his head off.

“I mean, there’s no anniversaries coming up, no birthday, and I doubt you’re here willingly where your team ain’t.” She lists off the facts with her fingers. Oikawa can feel the storm coming, this was only the calm before it.

“If you wanted to hide the fact that you’ve gone and practiced yourself ‘til you collapsed, maybe don’t have me listed as your emergency contact!” There it is. The ‘wrath’ she had mentioned the night before. “I mean seriously, Toruu! Did Hajime not tear your ass apart in highschool enough for practicing too hard?! You want me to do it too?! I’m scarier than that beefy bastard!” Yes, yes she is. Oikawa silently tells himself.

He clears the table of anything she could use against him as a weapon. Her chopsticks, fork, and empty mug, to name a few things.

“Oops?” Oikawa flinches as her palms make contact with the table. “Oops?!” She screeches. Oikawa gulps down a spoonful of miso soup, trying his best to avoid her gaze. He’s expecting more yelling, but is met with a soft look and a teary girlfriend over miso soup and rice. Fuck. He’d prefer the yelling girlfriend.

“Did you know how useless I felt when your coach called me saying you were bedridden for a week because you just didn’t know when to stop?” She lets out a deep breathe and continues, “Like what the fuck was I supposed to do from across the world? Fucking pray you weren’t out there dying? You didn’t even have the decency to call and let me know!”

Despite her larger than life personality that Oikawa has grown to love over the years, the sight of his girlfriend looking so small makes his heart burst from guilt. He fucked up. That much he could admit. His tendency to push higher and relentlessly practice until he felt his lungs begging for a break was always something that worried her, especially now that she’s not exactly within reach to stop him from pushing himself too hard.

“Toruu, I support your dream one hundred percent, even if it’s taking you thousands of miles away from me, but please,” The anger laced in her voice is replaced with desperation, making Oikawa want to reach out and hold her close, “take care of yourself too. If not for yourself, then do it for me.”

He doesn’t know whether it’s the fact that someone cares about him so much to the point it brings her to tears, or the fact that she is in tears, but he feels himself trembling from the burst of affection. Oikawa doesn’t have the best track record of handling his insecurities well, but knowing that that makes her sad makes him want to do better.

Oikawa crosses over the table and gently places her head on his chest, rubbing soothing circles on her back. Though she’s still a bit shaky from yelling and crying, Y/N eventually calms herself down to sniffles and tiny whimpers.

“I’m sorry.” Oikawa decides to speak first.

“I wasn’t looking for an apology.”

“But I’m sorry either way.” He lets his body fall into her embrace, noting this as another thing he’s missed since moving to Argentina. “For not taking care of myself. For not letting you know I collapsed. For always worrying you, but never stopping to check in on you.”

“And I’m sure this’ll happen again in the future,” he earns a light smack on his chest for that, “but I’ll just say sorry for that too.”

“And,” Oikawa mumbles, his face burrowed deep into the crook of her heck, “thank you, for looking out for me even though I don’t deserve it. You can’t understand how much I appreciate knowing you’re there for me, even if it’s not always physical.”

Y/N feels herself relaxing in his embrace, arms finally wrapping themselves around his waist. Her eyes are slightly watery as she looks up and says, “Promise you won’t hide these kinds of things from me anymore?”

Oikawa opens his mouth to respond, but is interrupted,

“And I don’t just mean when you pass out. I mean like if it ever gets hard living alone in Argentina. If you miss home, if you think you’re working too hard and need a break, I want to know everything, Toruu.”

Oikawa simply hums in response, placing a kiss on her forehead. “I promise.”

-

A little while later, after they’ve both calmed down and are cuddling on the couch watching some old movie, Oikawa perks up, suddenly remembering something.

“I brought you a gift, by the way.” He skips off into the bedroom, unzipping one of his many suitcases. (He packed four, plus his carry ons. He’s only staying for two weeks). Y/N is visibly nervous at the fact that this ‘gift’ has a whole suitcase designated for it. Turns out she had a good reason to be.

“What the fuck am I looking at.”

“It’s me!” Oikawa exlaims, one hand forming a peace sign brought up to his face, and the other holding up a horrendous life sized body pillow complete with his face and team uniform. Y/N could only blink, wishing to Christen her eyes from the terrible sight. Or maybe turn back time to before she even saw it. After a long moment of silence, in which Oikawa did not move an inch from his previous position, Y/N finally gathers enough sanity to say,

“Alright, get the fuck out of my house.”

Oikawa decides to dig his own grave by cheekily calling out, “Oh come on babe! Think of it as a coping mechanism for when you’re missing your totally awesome boyfriend-”

A throw pillow makes it’s way to Oikawa’s face. They’re called throw pillows for a reason, because now Oikawa’s forehead is red, tears brimming in his eyes from the loud smack! that met his face hard. But apparently not hard enough seeing as how he still manages to let out a, “nice throw,” over teary eyes and two thumbs up. Y/N thinks her boyfriend might be an idiot.

A/N. Very very very short, I know. I haven’t been writing as much bc I don’t have inspiration for anything??? But I’ll get back into it soon. For now, thank you for reading!! I AM working on the two requests I got, but those might take some time!! Sorry for the wait lol. - chuu

#haikyuu #haikyuu!! #hq #hq!! #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu scenarios #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu oneshots #hq imagines #hq scenarios #hq x reader #hq oneshots #oikawa toru #oikawa toru imagine #oikawa toru scenario #oikawa toru x reader #oikawa toru oneshot #aoba johsai #seijoh

[chasingforeverandaday]

lost and insecure, you found me

A continent away from the place they were forced apart, two lost souls find each other and learn to live a life worth living.

Unable to bear living in the land that saw his best friend's murder, Gendry flees to the Free City of Braavos, nightmares of a red witch and her touch still haunt him, as do the memories of a gray-eyed girl left behind. Little does he know that Arya was only a few alleys away, blind and confused as she tried to forget the passion that once howled through her icy veins. Happenstance and divine intervention throw the last Baratheon bastard and his Stark not quite a lady back together after years apart, both so very different yet so very much the same.

Part one of my contribution to the @gendryabigbang, this monster is my baby and I love it almost as much as I want to chuck it out a window. Thank you to @go-catch-a-chickn for her amazing moodboards, and I can’t wait to share what comes next!

#gendrya #gendrya bigbang #lost and insecure you found me #arya stark #gendry waters #arya x gendry #my writing

[thedreammweaver]

You Are My Destiny (Burton-schumachervers riddlebird, angst, hurt/comfort)

Warnings: blood, murder, violence, arkham stuff, insecurities mention, poor self image mention

“Are you sure we should be putting him in here with...you know.”

“Who? Nygma? C’mon, he’s harmless. Poor son of a bitch can’t even talk anymore I doubt he’ll be any help to this one.”

Ed listened attentively to the orderlies outside his cell from where he was laying on his bed where he always was. He was aware that Arkham was facing an issue where they had more patients then cells and were cramming two or three into one cell despite regulations. Ed figured he was about to get a new cell mate, he didn’t very much care though. He’d given up caring about things months ago, at least now he’d have something to watch. He didn’t look up as he heard his cell door open and something being shoved in before the door was closed very quickly.

Oswald growled angrily as he worked at ripping off the muzzle that had been forced on him,?once it was off he chucked it into the wall. Ed just watched the other man look around the room, presumably for anything he could use to escape. He knew who Oswald was and Oswald had heard of the riddler but they’d never crossed paths before now, what an odd way to meet. Oswald immediately ruled out the vent as a way to escape, knowing very well that he would never fit through even if he could reach. It was the same with the high window, even if he could get the bars off of the it was too small for him to fit through as well. He cursed his ample form and decided to instead inspect the ginger man laying on one of the beds. “So you’re the infamous Riddler, huh?” Ed only looked through Oswald, not making eye contact. “Damn, they really did a number on you..poor bastard.”

    Over the next few days Ed payed close attention to Oswald though nobody was aware that Ed could pay close attention to anything anymore. He listened to Oswald rant about how it took a lot of care to properly make clothes for someone of his unique proportions otherwise there’s problems like the ones the hastily made striped jumpsuit he was in presented. Some of the seams had already started to give in places where it hugged his frame. He also complained about how the wide stripes made him look bigger, Ed didn’t think that but he’d gathered Oswald’s perception of his own appearance wasn’t the best. Ed wanted to tell the other man he was beautiful...but he couldn’t , that was a weird thing to think about a stranger and yet Ed thought it and thought it again. He always watched with great interest when the orderlies came to take Oswald for ‘therapy’. It took nearly five of them to do it, one of them almost always got bitten before they could force the muzzle on. Sedatives only seemed to make Oswald angrier, for someone of his short stature he could surprisingly hold his own in a fight. Ed missed Oswald when he was gone and was excited when he heard him being brought back down the hallway, he hadn’t felt excitement for the year and a half he’d been in Arkham besides when Chase Meridian came to see him...but that felt like decades ago. Ed was so intrigued by the shorter man’s habits, how he snored, how he twitched so much in his sleep, how he was a perfect mix of refined and crass. He was funny too, Ed forgot what funny felt like. Oswald must’ve felt comfortable around Ed cause he told him a lot. About his childhood, about himself, just a lot. Ed had started imagining they were best friends until it progressed to something more. When Oswald told stories of past romantic or sexual escapades Ed always imagined the person Oswald was speaking about was him, that’s when he realized he’d already started thinking of Oswald as a lover. The thought of Oswald being his made Ed feel and care and want, he never wanted that to stop.

     It was night now, Oswald couldn’t sleep. He lined his flippers up with the moonlight coming through the small window and made a shadow puppet of a bat on the wall. Ed made the effort to turn his head to the wall to look. “Oh, you like that, huh?” He chuckled as he made the bat flap it’s wings and started mimicking bat noises. “I see without seeing...to me darkness is as clear as daylight...” Ed recalled to himself so quietly it barely qualified as a whisper, his voice weak from disuse. Oswald didn’t hear him over his self entertainment. Ed smiled softly, that was it, he had to make Oswald his, he couldn’t stand not to. While still watching the other man he reached under his bed and felt for the screw that held the leg of the bed to the metal frame. He began turning it with his fingers, it was difficult as due him being catatonic for so long and Arkham’s failure to administer frequent physical therapy Ed’s strength had somewhat deteriorated. He felt the screw dig and cut into his fingers but he kept turning as he watched Oswald get bored of the shadow puppetry and turn over to try and sleep.

“Alright, up we go, Nygma.” One of the orderlies said as they pulled Ed to his feet. “Fuck, why is he bleeding?” The other one said in disgust as he noticed the blood dripping from Ed’s fingers.

“I don’t know, must be biting himself or something, who cares.”

Ed was slumped down in the chair as the doctor ‘evaluated’ him. Really it was just routine, he didn’t actually care how Ed was doing. “How do you like you’re new cell mate, Edward?” He asked rhetorically, knowing Ed wouldn’t answer. “I hope, for your sake, that you won’t miss him when he’s gone tonight.” The doctor said, looking through files on his desk “Since I know you can keep a secret and I’ve been just dying to tell someone about this little project, I’m going to let you in on something very exciting.” There was evil in the man’s smile as he continued “You see, our dear Mr. Cobblepot is not insane. Disturbed? Most definitely, however, not crazy so there’s no reason for him to be here.....but being a man of science I can’t just release him.” He got up to look through a file cabinet on the other side of the room “I mean, the man is a medical anomaly. The syndactyly alone would be enough but there is so much more....anyways, I’ve decided I must dissect him. I’m afraid that means you’ll be back to being alone by tomorrow morning, dear Edward.” It was easy for Ed to hide his distress but inside his mind was racing. They were going to dissect Oswald? Take him away? Take Ed’s Oswald away? No...they weren’t, Ed wouldn’t let them.

     Ed waited patiently that night for the orderlies to come busting in, Oswald’s snoring soothed him for now as he worked at the screw under his bed. It felt like it had started digging into his bone now, Ed didn’t care he kept turning. The door opened quietly, only one orderly came in. He was holding a syringe, Ed deduced that it had to be something lethal as they quickly stopped bothering with sedatives on Oswald in the first day. Ed finally got the screw out, seething as he watched the orderly walk over to Oswald. Filled with a determination only love could bring about, Ed ripped the leg from the bed frame and forced his tired body over to the syringe armed man. “MINE!” he yelled as he brought the metal stick down on the man’s head, the feral declaration of ownership startled Oswald awake but Ed didn’t stop, he brought the metal down on the man’s head over and over again, how dare he try to take his Oswald away. Spotting the syringe in the orderlies hand Oswald quickly worked out that Ed must be protecting him. Ed stopped once the orderly’s face was just a puddle of viscera “Mine..” he asserted quietly once more, his throat already hurting from yelling.

    Oswald stopped to catch his breath once he and Ed hadn’t heard the alarms from Arkham for a few miles. “Thanks,” Oswald said sincerely “I guess we can go our separate ways now-“ he was cut off by Ed suddenly hugging him and shaking his head in disapproval of that idea, almost in a panic. It took Oswald only a second to realize that Ed didn’t save him because he just needed someone to escape with, he saved him simply because he was in danger. “O-Oh,” Oswald was a bit flustered as the ginger man bear hugged him as if he meant everything to him “So it’s like that, is it?” he smirked, gently pushing Ed off. “Hmm, you’re cute,” he mumbled while studying the taller man’s face “I guess we can stick together for a while.” He grabbed Ed’s hand and they kept moving. Ed was grinning ear to ear as Oswald led him. ‘A while?’ He thought ‘I think you mean forever.’

#oswald cobblepot #edward nygma #the penguin #the riddler #riddlebird

[angry-birds-imagines]

Birds comforting their s/o (AB headcanons)

Anon asks: How would the birds comfort their s/o when they are crying or just feeling sad?

*It’s an interesting request. I’ve put a little twist, adding about bullying. Never bully each other especially the ones who are different. It’ll end up so much worse in your life, having anxiety, self conscious about themselves, depressed etc.

If you’re suffering any of these, you are wonderful just the way you are, you matter, you deserve so much happiness just like everyone else. And even though it’s hard, there’s a reason, or someone to fight for and live.

Allright, here we go!

-----------------------------------------------------------

Red: Whenever Red sees his s/o feel sad or crying, he gets worried and ask them what’s wrong. He respects it if his partner doesn’t want to talk about it yet, so instead gives them a long hug, so his s/o can let it all out. Red would gently hold them and not letting go until his partner calms down a bit. He would also take you a not fully or a not crowded place, where you two can enjoy the silence or talk about it, or play together, so his s/o would feel better. Even better, cuddle, because it’s always relaxing. If Red’s s/o is insecure about themselves, he tells them how he feels about them, the reasons why he loves them and they count on him and the flock. If someone bullies his partner, Red get furious, like 0 to 100; even after he comforts them, he goes alone or get Chuck and Bomb and find the bullies and confront them.

Chuck: „What happened?”; „Who hurt my princess?”; Whoever hurt you, I’ll get them, and make a sweet, sweet revenge!” etc. If his s/o got hurt, being bulllied, Chuck won’t hesitate to find those bastards, using his speedy skills and pranks them, then he comes back right after to his s/o. If his partner had or having a bad day, Chuck immediately comforts them, and say sweet things that would make them feel better. He even takes them to a small party, or going to the beach or spend time with the flock, whatever his princess would love to go or do. He just wants to brighten their day and not care about the bad times.

Bomb: Whatever problem his s/o has, he stops any activities he’s doing and turns into a cuddle support bird, so he can hold his partner, comforting them. He might not have the best advices, but he does his best to make them smile and brighten their day. He’s goes with cool jokes, reading comics, go swimming, having ice cream and chill. Bomb might make a tickle fight with his s/o, he can’t help it, but loves his partner laugh and feel better after a bad day. He listens whatever his s/o has on their mind and again, he does his best to give some advices and tell them how much he loves them.

The Blues (Jim, Jake and Jay): Even though they think of their soon to be s/o as a friend, if they are having a bad day, or someone bullies them, the triplets won’t hesitate to avange them. Jim, Jake and Jay would probably set up some plans to prank that person who hurt their friend or just pulling pranks around the birds or pigs, just make their friend’s they better. If their friends just want to chill, that’s fine, so the triplets take them to skating, swimming, hanging around with Bomb, or Hal (whenever he visits the flock), so they forget about the bad day

Matilda: Matilda goes into mother hen mode, she makes some tea/hot chocolate/cocoa, even cook some soup, or her s/o’s favourite meal. (I headcanon that Matilda cooks well, but there are some time when she accidentally ruins the meal, just like in the Toons episode called Cordon Bleugh). Matilda always listens and gives her partner some advice. She even takes her s/o to her zen garden, meditate with relaxing music, give them a comforting back massage. If someone mocks or bullies her partner while taking a walk around the island, Matilda would ignore them, but if the bullies continue, she would go straight to them, and teach them some manners

Terence: Whoever hurt his s/o, he’ll make sure that the bullies would never return or leave you alone. He’s everywhere, so they don’t have a place to hide, because one sec later, Terence would scare them. If his s/o had a bad day, Terence surpises his partner in a sweet way, make gifts, go some quiet place where no one disturbs them. Terence would even nudge them gently, even let them cuddle on top of him, listening to his heartbeat and comforting hummings.

Hal: Hal is probably use violence against the bullies, but he still tells those bastards some manners, with a few rekt comebacks when he doesn’t feel that shy. Overall Hal does his best to make his s/o feel better. If they need comforting hugs, words, cuddles, go camping, sing for them, he’ll give them. Seeing his partner feel better and happy makes him feel happy. One of the best thing Hal would do is taking his s/o to camp with him, cooking their favourite meal, enjoy the peace and quiet, his campfire songs, and the stargazing.

Stella: She gets annoyed when someone mock and bullies her s/o, so she goes straight to the bullies and teach them a lesson. Even if it’s a bad day, Stella always comforts her partner, with true love and kind words. She makes sure that her s/o think about something else, so she makes a lot of activities with them, especially dress up in style and fashion. At the end of the day, Stella would even make a blanket fort for each other, enjoying the lights, the stars, the peace and the lots of comfort. She would even cuddle them and if her partner falls asleep, she would totally hold them all night.

#angry birds #angry birds imagines #angry birds headcanons #angry birds headcanon #headcanon #angry birds red #angry birds chuck #angry birds bomb #angry birds blues #angry birds matilda #angry birds terence #angry birds hal #angry birds stella

[misha-moose-dean-burger-lover]

First Line Game

Rules: List 10 of your published fics and their first sentences, and then tag other writers to do it. I had decided to do this in the first place but then I got tagged by @petrichoravellichor and @moderatelypanickedbisexual (whose, and other’s amazing lists you’ll find when you scroll further down on my blog, and I totally recommend you to read everything on it!) 

I know most of us are pasting the links too, to make it easier, but I do not have all the links in one place, and I have a really inefficient tagging system, so I’m just gonna do all the titles and first sentences (and if someone is interested in reading a particular work, they are welcome to ask me for it in my inbox, and I’ll get back to them as soon as I can, personally.) Also hey, I might do a couple of sentences, is that okay with y’all?

***

1. Baby: (crack!fic, human!impala, Destiel) “What!? You’re what, now?”

2. A Walk: (domestic destiel fluff, inspired by @a-mess-of-many-fandoms‘s prompt, holding hands) For all they’ve been through, for all Dean’s ever thought - it’s really very simple, in the end.

3. Pushing A Few Limits: (destiel college AU, ohmygod-they-were-roommates, borderline smut) Of - fucking - course, the bastard was doing it on purpose.

4. Good Luck Charms: (drabble-ish, canon divergence, mentions of the Impala) After it happened, Dean hadn’t known that so many little and large things would follow. That they’d all make him so much happier, with the mess that was his life. But it was all about the little things; and sometimes the large ones, such as when it happened.

5. Movie Night: (s14 coda, domestic destiel, LOTR, background Samwena) “Ahh,” Dean let out a perfect sound of exhaustion meeting the plush comfort of his couch. “It’s finally Tuesday.”

6. Babysitting and Pizzamanning: (destiel college AU, the babysitter and the pizzaman, there’s a baby in this one) ‘Calm down, calm down, calm down!’ Who was that even directed to? Castiel - or the infant in his arms?

6. Picking You Up: (destiel college AU, nerd Cas, domestic fluff, drabble-y but very long) The first time he does it, he has a very valid reason to. Cas has a broken femur, and a cast to show for it.

7. Apps, Boundaries and Carriages: (dating app, sexuality crisis, destiel college AU, homophobia, John Winchester’s A+ Parenting) Dean Winchester doesn’t do ‘online dating’. But what he can agree to, while sufficiently drunk and not thinking, is Charlie Bradbury setting up a profile on one of those sites - as long as the Impala is his profile picture.

8. The Supernatural Series: (canon divergence, Chuck Shurley, destiel reading husbands, lots of callbacks to previous episodes, finally destiel) Some buzzed the door to the Bunker. The footsteps inside the bunker drained it out, familiar voices all muffled.

9. In Between: (destiel college AU, not explicit but smut, insecurities, fluffy in the middle) Castiel remembered why he made the decision to walk to the kitchen to get water, himself; instead of letting Dean get it for him - seeing Dean Winchester, all 6'2 of his glorious freckled nakedness in his bed, tangled in his bedsheets was one thing - seeing the gorgeous man walking around in his kitchen nude was another. Cas would never be able to boil another ramen unaroused.

10. Once Upon A Time At Hogwarts: (harry potter/spn crossover, slytherin!dean, hufflepuff!Cas, Yule Ball, very long) Michael, Castiel’s brother and Prefect of Gryffindor, had been perfectly correct in his opinion of Slytherins.

I’m all done! But this was fun, and I did get tagged more than once, so what would y’all think if I produce another list like this? I think I’ve missed a few, and I’ve certainly missed a couple of my personal favorites. Anyways, for this post, this is enough. Hope you had fun.

Everyone I wanna tag has already been tagged, but since I’m supposed to tag, I’m just gonna tag y’all again! If you wanna do it again, you’re more than welcome to!! If you don’t, feel free to ignore. @all-or-nothing-baby @a-mess-of-many-fandoms @iamcharliebradburylevelperfect @adventurous-blob @wolveswingsandwrenches @telefunkies @styggtroll @crack--attack @dammitsammy @suckerfordeansfreckles @ain-t-bovvered @impala-dreamer 

#sheya shall deliver #writing #fanfictions #destiel #mostly #I got to post none of the sabriel ones #i DID not think this through #I could've done a balanced thing of all my ships #I have a secret sabriel stash #mwuahaha #destiel fanfictions #spn

[bugheadfamily]

This week the spotlight is on Anna ( @writeradamanteve )! Click the read more link below to get to know our member!

Spotlight by Mila, @jughead-jones | Graphic by Katie, @betty-cooper

Anna | @writeradamanteve

Name: Anna 

Age: 40

Location: New Jersey

Any other languages aside from English people can contact you in?: Filipino.

Favourite Riverdale characters and ships?: Aside from Betty and Jughead, I do love the awfulness of Cheryl Blossom and spitfire that is season 1 Veronica.

Cheryl Blossom is unapologetically terrible, and in real life, I would absolutely HATE her, but there’s something to be said about a woman who just goes all in. I get that hardness in her, and I like it that she admires others for it, too. That Toni brings out her soft side is a plus, but I would prefer that she stays true to her character outside of her romantic relationship. 

Season 1 Veronica Lodge was a champion of women. I loved that about her. I may not have bought the whole “Betty is my best friend” assertion, but I did like that she was doing it to make amends for her past. S1!Veronica wanted to do better and she looked at Betty and thought Betty was a good person to hang out with to further that. Veronica as a person is methodical. Deliberate. And those are characteristics that can be both good and bad. I like it that Veronica can go both ways. I also mean that in a very gay way. No amount of her sleeping with Archie will convince me that her character can’t be bi. I can’t even say I hate her in season 2. She seemed a little lost there, but she was deciding between her family and her principles. For a while she thought that both could coexist, but when she realized in the end that it couldn’t, she broke away. That’s badass. 

As for Betty and Jughead, I have at least 500K worth of words in fanfic that expresses the many ways I love them. But to be clear: 

I love Betty for being so steadfast in her beliefs. She may have her insecurities when it comes to how she looks and what her mother may think of her, but when it comes injustice and friends endangering themselves for sex, she isn’t going to let anyone prevent her from doing the right thing. She is a go-getter, from saving Pop’s to saving her relationship (especially when Jughead was pulling away from her). She is a master at wielding household items — a skill, we learned, she got from Alice, who’s clearly handy with a lamp. She’s kinky, and she can be scary stone cold — forcing Cheryl to testify the truth with blackmail, watching Jughead punch Chic in the face without flinching, drowning a man to get him to confess to his sins (although ask me some other time about the morality and racial undertones of that, as that is an entirely different conversation). But she also deeply values her relationships. She cares for her loved ones so much, friend or family. That makes her so strong.

Let me tell you the many Jugheads I love: Soft!Jughead, Smughead Jones, Curious Jones, Snowflake!Jughead, ProudBF!Juggie, and even HaplessSerpent!Jughead. I like him best when he’s writing and when he’s making literary references in regular conversation. I love how sarcastic he could be and how his transition from loner weird kid in Riverdale High to popular serpent prince in Southside High tugs at my heartstrings and makes me mad, too. Like Betty, he cares fiercely for the people he loves. His need to belong becomes real to him, after he tried to deny it for so long. As much as we all have our issues with Season 2 Jughead, it added certain dimensions to Jughead that I love to write about in fanfic.

Favourite moments from S1 & S2?: I think I loved most of season 1, but the moments that stood out to me most were these: When Betty was dancing happily in her Cheerleading uniform, when Betty and Jughead were searching Jason’s room and got caught, when Jughead and Betty went to the Sisters of Quiet Mercy together, when Betty rushed to SSH to save Jughead only to find him laughing at the lunch tables with his newfound friends, when Veronica stood up for Betty at the tryouts, when Veronica showed Cheryl compassion, when the girls all banded together to make Chuck suffer the consequences of his misogyny (again, I have words for this, but mostly — why only him? His wasn’t the only name on that playbook), when Cheryl calls people names, when Jughead protected Betty from her vandalized locker, and of course, when Jughead climbed Betty’s bedroom window.  While I can’t get enough of Jughead throwing Betty against the kitchen counter, I have to admit I still loved those other scenes a whole lot more. That said, I will still hope for what I mention in question #7.

Season 2 — ah, my goodness. I don’t need to explain how S2 broke my heart in so many good and bad ways. While there were some golden moments, I think most of us are in agreement that there were so many things that could’ve been done better. However, I STILL do have favorite scenes in this Hell Season: Jughead running the gauntlet was amazing, Betty working on Reggie’s car, the entire street race sequence, every time Betty uses a household object to save people (a shovel, a rolling pin, a poker), Jughead and Betty disposing of the car--from her house to the swamp, that entire episode of “The Wicked and the Divine”, Cheryl and Toni finding one another, and the hunger strike scenes.

What are your hopes for S3?:

Bughead summer sex montage. 

MOAR Bughead Detective Agency. 

A slammin’ Riverdale Parents Flashback episode. 

Joaquin stays and Kevin gets better with love and BDE.  

Kevin and Josie becoming step-siblings.

Reggie and Sweetpea being half-brothers.

Veronica being the Speakeasy Queen.

Cheryl stirring trouble (even if I know I’ll hate her for it).

Archie getting a clue.

Other fandoms you’re into?: My thing is that I don’t usually fan hard on more than one thing. My past fandoms were Harry Potter, Teen Titans, Anime (many of them at once), Cowboy Bebop, X-Files, Star Trek Voyager, and Firefly. At present, I love Star Wars (all of them — eh, except maybe for Episodes 1, 2, and 3), Wonder Woman, and all the Marvel movies.  

What are some of your favourite movies/TV?: Classics: Galaxy Quest, Tropic Thunder, Labyrinth, The Princess Bride, Forest Gump, The Matrix, Constantine, Clueless, The Breakfast Club, Transformers: The Animated Movie, Snatch, Firefly, Veronica Mars, Supernatural (Seasons 1 - 5), X-Files; 

Most Recent: Pacific Rim, Black Panther, Wonder Woman, Rogue One, Ready Player One, Anne with an E, Daredevil, Luke Cage, Jessica Jones, Anthony Bourdaine’s old and new series. 

Favourite books?: There are so many, fam, but here are the ones that first come to mind:

Harry Potter 1 - 6 (yeah, sorry, not a huge fan of the 7th)

Emma by Jane Austen

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen

All of Louisa May Alcott’s books

All of Sharon Shinn

All of L.M. Montgomery

Anne Marston’s Rune Blade Trilogy

Barb and J.C. Hendee’s Noble Dead Saga

The Infernal Devices Trilogy (Cassandra Clare)

A Great and Terrible Beauty by Libba Bray

All of Zilpha Keatley Snyder books

All of Paula Danziger books

Juliet Naked by Nick Hornby

Eating Animals by Jonathan Safran Foer

The Unlikely Disciple by Kevin Roose

The Monster of Florence by Douglas Preston and Mario Spezi

The Terror by Dan Simmons

Good Omens by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett

The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

Misery by Stephen King

Favourite bands/musicians?: I shall date myself, thanks:

Queen

Guns & Roses

Metallica

Nikki Minaj

Cardi B

Imagine Dragons

One Republic

The Killers

Lily Allen

Cake

Eminem

Amy Winehouse

U2

Sting

If you could live in any fictional world which one would you choose and why?: Harry Potter, no doubt. I would like to live in a world that relies on magic. I would like to go to a magical school like Hogwarts. I would love to fight in a resistance to overthrow an evil sorcerer. Plus, I would really, really love to meet Hermione.

Favourite food?:

Ramen (the real stuff, not the dried instant ones)

Banh Mi

Bun bo Hue

Sushi

Filipino Food — particularly Adobo

Tacos

Mangos and strawberries

Favourite season?: Summer.

Favourite plant?: This is an odd question to me as I don’t have a favorite plant. They are just there and sometimes they give me grief when I have to tend to the outside of my house because they’ve gotten unruly on some level (like — Fall, why do you have to discard your leaves all over my grounds?)

Favourite scent?: Baby’s breath, food, and freshly changed bed sheets.

Favourite colour?: Victorian pink.

Favourite animal?: Cats and Owls (I am definitely a witch by heart).

Are you a night owl, an early bird, or a vampire?: I sleep late and wake up early. I am an old person who can go on 5 hours of sleep.

Place you want to visit?: Portugal or Prague is next on my list.

Do you have pets? If you do, tell us a little about them: I have two pets. Pootie is a cat. He is a gray tuxedo. He loves me best, but he also hangs around my eldest child a lot. Every once in a while, he bothers my husband. Bob is a hermit crab. Bob bores the hell out of me and I am equal parts terrified that I will find him dead in his cage and tired that I am still taking care of him. His previous companions, Larry and Curly, have perished. When I found them dead, I screamed. Hermit crabs are creepy as fuck when they leave their shells, like I can’t stand them that way. I don’t know why I am stuck taking care of Bob, but he’s here, he is under my care, and God help me, he’s a stubborn bastard.

Tell us a little about yourself?: 

For work, I’m a web producer/web developer, and I maintain about 20 sites for my company.  

I used to work in publishing.

I went to law school and quit.

I eventually married my high school sweetheart and now we have 3 children.

I was always attracted to women, too, but growing up, I was too afraid to come out as bi. It still intimidates me, coming out to new people now. Most times, I just let them draw their own conclusions.

Fun or weird fact about you?: There’s nothing weird about me that you don’t already know. Fun fact: I kickbox in the nearby UFC gym, and one time, I was practicing with Tai pads with a dude who kicked me in the leg by accident — he just “grazed” me, really. I TRIED VERY HARD to pretend that I was alright. That night, my leg was swollen, and three months later, I saw that same dude fighting in the octagon on TV.

Asks for fanfic authors:

How long have you been writing?: 20 years.

Which is your favourite of the fics you’ve written?: That is impossible to answer. Truly. So I’m going to close my eyes over a list of my stories and where my finger lands, that’s my fave. It’s Drive.

Favourite fic/chapter/plot-point/character you’ve ever written?: This is even harder. 

Polly’s character arc in Wicked. I really love how I fleshed her out in that story

The development of Kevin and Jughead’s friendship in Harvest to Home

Jughead’s relationship with Archie and Jellybean in Drive.

Betty’s story arc in Drive.

The twists and turns of Wicked.

The rich ambience of Harvest to Home.

Betty and Cheryl’s friendship in Harvest to Home.

The text conversation in Drive.

Sweet Pea’s background character in Drive.

Cheryl’s character in Wicked.

The car chase scene in Drive.

The hotel scene in Cowboy Jones.

The Peitho kitchen scene in Cowboy Jones.

Which was the hardest to write, and why?: Wicked was hard to write. I had set out to write this story with the twists and turns in mind, and those twists were interlaced. I had to set stuff up all throughout the beginning and middle so that the end would make sense. It was also harder because of Season 2. The background of those episodes in contrast with what I had in mind tended to make me nervous about reader expectations. Like when Hal was suddenly the Black Hood on Riverdale, it felt odd to not make him so terrible in Wicked. 

One of the hardest chapters I had to write was a chapter written in Cheryl’s POV. Delving into her psyche was a difficult switch to turn on and at some point, I was doubting whether I can do it, but I did it and there it was. And I don’t regret it at all.

How do you come up with the ideas for you fic(s)? (examples: Do you draw inspiration from real life? Listen to music? Get inspired by TV/movies?) Do you have an process to your writing?: Inspiration is different every time. 

For Harvest to Home, I wanted to write a fic about a very domestic Betty who made beautiful things. While I was writing that fic, I was deeply into the show Fixer Upper because we had just moved into our own new home. I was absolutely inspired by the designs I saw on TV and our need to decorate our home. I wanted Betty to be so good at it that she wrote a blog about home making. I had a lot of inspiration for that as well, since in the publishing company I used to work for, I worked with a lot of chefs and homemakers who published books. 

For Drive, I was inspired by images of Mechanic!Betty at the start of Season 2. I think I may have seen a couple of fics inspired by the movie Baby Driver, where Jughead drove the getaway cars, and honestly, I got a little mad that Betty was never the driver. So I wrote the damn thing, and suddenly, Jughead was drag racing in Season 2. I wrote that fic with a lot of alternative music in the background. I usually started my chapters with the lyrics of those songs that inspired me.

For Wicked, I started writing it for Halloween and it basically grew too large of an idea to make it to Halloween of that year. I was also hesitant about how the fandom would receive a fic where Betty was a witch. Then there came that article about how Alice was possibly a Spellman. WELL THEN. 

Cowboy Jones was absolutely inspired by the Camp Bughead prompts. I figured since I hadn’t been driven out of the fandom by torches and pitchforks because of Wicked, I’d try for some sci-fi, a genre I really love. I aimed to misbehave with Cowboy Jones, so I told myself that this was going to be my smuttiest work yet. I had also put out an X-Files inspired bughead short called The Truth is Here for that same prompt. 

I answered the question about my writing process here and some more about character development here. 

Idea that you always wanted to write?: Kitchen Confidential type story, where Jughead is an asshole chef who is determined to make his restaurant succeed. Betty becomes his sous chef and shows him a thing or two about cooking and about life.

Favourite character to write?: Betty and Jughead, no doubt.

Best comment/review you’ve ever received?: Well, there are so many commenters who have been so fantastic, but my favorite comments come from those who want to have a discussion with me, mostly because I like to reply to all commenters to express my gratitude and it’s easier to reply when I can pick up a conversation.

Best and worst parts of being a writer?: Best part is finishing a chapter and posting it. Worst part is getting flamed. I have been fortunate enough to have a welcoming group of readers here, but I’ve had my share of flames in other fandoms. I always try to dig deep for something constructive in them — there always is something that can be so useful to my writing, but man, those are TOUGH to handle sometimes.

Do you have any advice to offer?: Few things:

Don’t let fear rule your life. Embrace that fear and get to know it. Find out what makes it frightening, then overcome it. 

Practice. That is the only thing that will make you better at anything. 

Learn from failure. It’s a bitch of a teacher but it’s the best lesson you’ll ever have.

Find work that you love. It always pays.

.

.

This is the eleventh installment of Bughead Family’s Member Spotlight series. Each week, a member’s url is selected through a randomizer and they will be featured in a spotlight post. In order to participate, please join the Bughead Discord (more information found here). Thank you.

#bughead #riverdale #bughead fanfiction #bughead family discord #bugheadfamily #member spotlight

[greenteafiend]

Sorting Lance

I did this according to @sortinghatchats way of doing things so check out their tumblr if you aren’t familiar with it here.

In a nutshell, your primary house explains why you do things, while your secondary house explains how. 

So Lance is a tricky bastard, I feel like there’s a lot going on under the surface that he conceals behind a flirty, irreverent façade, but here’s my 2 cents:

Primary Ravenclaw and Secondary Slytherin

Hear me out!

It was easy to decide Lance’s secondary, and more difficult to decide his primary.

I think Ravenclaw for a primary because that is the constructed system. They create, modify, and outright adopt systems that give them frames and guidance for interacting with the world, and I think Lance has done this. According to the sorting hat chat page - they value truth. They want to find the correct, best way to look at the world and to interact with morality and the people around them. The systems can vary widely, and their inspiration can be taken from many sources. For Lance, I’m imagining his is based largely on his family’s morality. He values togetherness and friendship and companionship, things you would expect coming from a large family, but he also has this idea of heroism stuck in his brain. He desperately wants to be like Keith, but their reasons for doing things are just inherently different.  

Lance is fighting the Galra because he has decided that it is the right thing to do according to the moral system he has created. I don’t think it’s out of loyalty and obligation like Shiro, or an innate moral compass like Keith (not saying Lance doesn’t have morals, just that he and his morals have a different relationship compared to Keith and his), I think he’s constructed his belief system based on evidence and information available to him, and on the system imparted to him by his family, and saving the world by flying a blue robot is just one thing that falls within his constructed purview. He sees that objectively Galra are bad, and that he needs to protect earth and the universe, so that’s what he does. Fighting in the war is a lot more of a personal decision for Keith, Pidge and Shiro. Pidge wants her family, Shiro was taken prisoner for a year, and Keith spent a year looking for Blue in the desert. Lance doesn’t really have as much of a reason for being there as the others so I think the driving force, or rather is motivation for being there is pinned up by his constructed framework.

I think he could be given different data about the world that could possibly convince him to change his beliefs. (Not super drastically change as in side with the Galra, change as in realize that he doesn’t have to measure himself and his achievements against Keith’s or that he isn’t the 7th wheel). A good example of this is during season 3 when he supported Keith being the leader and the Black Paladin. At first he was so dead set against it, but then Black chose Keith so Lance changed his framework to accommodate this new truth and ultimately embraced Keith as Black Paladin and leader. 

Lance’s constructed system resembles Gryffindor quite a bit with the confident swagger and forced heroism, and but he is more willing to push boundaries which is probably why him and Keith argue and butt heads so much. Look at Lance bending the rules to take the alien chick he was flirting with on a ride on Blue? To Keith, his morality is mostly black and white. He feels right and wrong in his bones, whereas Lance is more willing to push boundaries and Keith just doesn’t get it so they argue. On the other hand, when they’re on the same page they work really well together.  

Whew. That was hard to articulate, hope it made sense?

For his secondary, Slytherin because that is the secondary of constant change. Lance is adaptable and resourceful. He goes with the flow and takes advantage of opportunities when they come. Slytherin secondaries are good at spotting unexpected opportunities and rapidly shifting their aim and approach in order to snatch up the possibilities in front of them, and that’s exactly what Lance did when him and Keith were in the Balmera and he stopped Keith from running in guns blazing. He thought of a more clever plan twice that episode, closing the hangar instead of destroying the ships and teaming up with Keith to take out the soldiers by drawing their fire to himself to protect the Balmera while Keith went in for the kill. You also see his resourcefulness and flexibility when he and Hunk were stuck on the mermaid planet. Same in the first episode where he just rolls with the punches with Pidge when they run in to save Shiro.

Something else about Lance: he presents the face he wants the world to see, singing a different tune as the situation requires, code-switching with ease. In contrast, Keith and Shiro can’t really be anything other than themselves. Lance hardly ever let’s all the artifice go to just be himself because that would leave him vulnerable, but I think we got a see a hint of his neutral state when he opened up a little about his insecurities at the end of S2 and when he confides in Keith during the infamous bedroom scene of S3.

When he and Keith are arguing, Keith is being genuine, he isn’t being anything other than himself, the way he said ‘but I cradled you in my arms!’ is painfully honest and genuine. Lance on the other hand is never just himself during those same interactions. He’s protecting himself and reacting defensively to the environment with layers of charm and contrivance. He’s sort of like a social chameleon, sampling the social climate before calibrating his responses (even though some of his chosen responses are pretty douchy *cough* flirting outrageously *cough* bickering with Keith *cough*)  Lance only lets you see what he wants you to, and I think requires trust before he is willing to properly open up.

Overall Verdict: Chuck him in SLYTHERIN!!

He’d make such a slick super charming Slytherin, and he is pretty super ambitious. Makes him a perfect foil to Keith’s Griffindor, they could still be rivals at Hogwarts haha. Lance’s adaptability and resourcefulness are his greatest strengths and that comes from Slytherin, plus a lot of what he does is driven by fierce ambition so let’s go with that.  

#lance mcclain #slytherin lance #sorting hat #hogwarts #voltron #vld #sorting lance into hogwarts #sortinghatchats

[pilawforhire-archived]

Once Sanji is home alone, he takes the blow-up doll and monster dildo that Law has given him and takes them to his roommate's chamber. There he puts the sex doll on Law's chair and drapes one of his friend's coats over her rubbery shoulders after he has decided that she looks a bit pitiful. He does not know where to put the ridiculous dildo, so he just places it on the table. Thanks to the suction cups on the base it stays upright perfectly. Sanji leaves it at that and returns to his own room.

Law’s face turns black upon entering his room to see that someone is sitting at his desk, in his favourite fur coat! How dare anyone intrude into his chamber and put on his clothes? Sanji?! Law chucks his backpack aside to his bed and rushes into the room to snatch back his coat, when he realises it’s only Rosie the sex doll which Sanji has ungratefully returned. Law huffs to himself and glowers at the sight of the monster dildo that Rosie is gazing at longingly with her 2D plastic eyes. Talk about a lack of hygiene! Did Sanji expect Law to touch the dildo after it had been up in his ass? Please! Law curls his lip in disgust and steps back. If Sanji had wished to annoy him, though, Sanji could have at least set up the scene a little better? Put in some effort and arrange the doll on Law’s bed in a suggestive pose? With the monster dildo in one of her holes?

Law lets out a dramatic sigh and sinks down onto his bed. He stares at Rosie the sex doll and scrutinises her assets or lack thereof.

Now, that was a lot of cash Law blew out of goodwill to make Sanji happier. How dare Sanji return it? What was wrong with Rosie? Did Sanji hate blondes? Or were her orifices too large to accommodate his girth nicely? Did Rosie make Sanji feel insecure? Was the monster dildo too small? Did Sanji not like the design?

Goodness gracious, Sanji is, without a doubt, the most difficult person Law has ever met. Law had tried time and time, many times, to get Sanji to answer his questions, to learn more about Sanji, besides that Sanji could cook very well. But Sanji remained tight-lipped throughout it all. A spy would have been more forthcoming with information than Sanji the tight-lipped tight-ass, for real! Why couldn’t Sanji just answer his questions? Law truly wished to know what Sanji felt about waking with breasts on his chest. It weighed on Law’s mind day and night. And what did Sanji think about women with cows’ udders? Bizarre questions they were, but in the future, cow’s udders might become a thing. Scientific research and development could be incredible like that. Perhaps, for women with breast cancer or men who wish to have breasts, cow’s udders could be a possible alternative option.

Mostly, Law did want to know more about Sanji but he couldn’t find it in himself to ask normal, ordinary questions because those sounded like Law actually wanted to become friends. And no, he could not risk that. Law needed to keep up his asshole act and thus, he would persist in bombarding Sanji with the most asinine and ridiculous questions his brain could think up. Already, Law had a tremendously long list he wished to spring on Sanji soon when Sanji least expected it. But first…

Law stomps to Sanji’s room and bangs open the door without knocking or calling out to announce his presence beforehand.

“You fucked her and then you dumped her to me?” Law crosses his arms to look more menacing. “Excuse me. I will not take your exes and your discards. First, you cheat on granny with Rosie, and now, she’s useless to you, all because her mouth is too big?” Law feigns utter disappointment in Sanji’s life choices.

“You don’t return presents,” Law continues. “Maybe I should’ve given them to granny instead, you ungrateful bastard. So, what should I do with Rosie and the toy?” Law taps his fingers on his arm in a moment of thought.

“You should take them to the old-age home,” Law suggests, deadpan. “I like to do some charity from time to time since you sin enough for the both of us and we gotta repent somehow. Go get the dildo off my desk now, I am very busy and have a lot of work to finish.” Of course, Law doubts Sanji would take the toys back, but he had to say something.

@blackleg5932

#thank you for sending! #long post #queued #blackleg5932 #asks

[twopointthreeninetoone]

(I’ll warn you up front: This shit is long. Because I wrote it while I was watching it, all those many years ago. Also, although I grew up on the movies and love them to death, 1) this is still pretty irreverent, so if you’re a mega-Star Wars fan and want to read nothing but praise for the movies, uh, don’t read this; and 2) I don’t know the official names for a lot of the characters and ships and weapons and so on. So don’t send my nasty anon messages about how I spelled sarlaac wrong. Because I honestly don’t give a fuck how many a’s are in that bloody word. But yeah. We’ll start at the end. That’s a very good place to start.

Revenge Return of the Jedi  (1983)

So, it’s been three years since The Empire Strikes Back.  We imagine that Luke & Co. were knocking around the galaxy—Luke finishing his Jedi training, Leia undoubtedly trying to figure out a way to get her boyfriend back, and oh yeah, there’s that whole rebellion thing going on as well.  Or maybe this takes places shortly after The Empire Strikes Back, with Luke & Co. stopping long enough for a cuppa before heading off to Jabba the Hut’s pad to rescue poor Han.  In any case, here we are, and we’re at Jabba the Hut’s place, and some weird shit is about to go down (read: metal bikini).

It’s apparently a three-pronged attack—initially R2D2 and C3PO lead the first wave of attack, pouncing upon Jabba’s compound with the grace and ferocity of black jaguars.  Or, they go there and are instantly given to Jabba by Luke as a sign of friendship.  It should be noted that Luke (or Mark Hamill) looks wrecked by now…and he’s wearing black.  The Fuck-Up Luke of the Past is no more, my friends.  We now have a calmer, more Stable Jedi Luke, who wears black and talks in a monotone voice and drops his friends at the slightest chance of getting to be in with the cool Jabba the Hut.  It’s just not cool, Luke.

After this scene, George Lucas injected a musical number for the special edition DVD.  Because we needed it.  We really did.  It didn’t stop the story at all.  It wasn’t weird.  And I didn’t fast forward through it.  Nope.  Because it was necessary, damn it.  A green alien dancer also gets eaten by a monster.  It should be noted that Lucas put in a few more shots of the dancer, twenty-one years after the fact.  What’s even more amazing is the fact that he doesn’t use CGI—oh no, not him.  He uses the same actress from the original movie, and what’s more amazing is that she looks the same.  If I hadn’t known all this, I would have thought it was old footage.  I just have to hope and pray that I look like her when I’m forty or fifty.

Second phase of the attack: Chewbacca and a strange alien bounty hunter guy stop by and the bounty hunter sells Chewbacca to Jabba.  You notice a pattern starting here.  Jabba thinks this is all pretty cool.  What he would do with Chewbacca, I really don’t know; although one imagines those Wookiee-skin rugs on the walls don’t bode well for him.  Either that, or…metal bikini.  Oh, and all this time you can see poor Han in his carbonite slab, a very interesting (if mean-spirited) wall decoration for Jabba’s lair.  I can imagine Jabba showing his partygoers around.  “…And this is Han Solo, a bounty hunter who crossed me way back when, so I had him encased in carbonite.  Would you like some punch?”  The Strange Alien Bounty Hunter gets to stick around, I guess.  They don’t much care what he does now.  It’s a bit like the Kennedy compound in that respect. 

That night the Strange Alien Bounty Hunter sneaks through Jabba’s dance room.  It sneaks around sneakily, and satisfactorily knocks over a lamp, runs into some wind chimes, steps on a cat, triggers an alarm, trips on another cat, steps on a rake, breaks a window, starts a fire, gets the dog barking, sets fire to a cat, and sneezes.  It’s still able to reach Han Solo and free him from the carbonite (in one of those cool eighties graphics like the kind you see in Ghostbusters and Labyrinth).  When he hits the ground, it sounds like a freighter was dropped off the Empire State Building.  That’s probably what woke Jabba up, but we’ll never know.  In any case, hey, Han is blind.  Can’t see a thing, and his hair is slicked back in that eighties manner.  And he’s really cold, poor guy.  So he can’t see the Strange Alien Bounty Hunter take him into its arms and cuddle him.  This was the first Star Wars movie I saw, and I distinctly remember thinking that was really, really weird.  As the Strange Alien Bounty Hunter soothes him, Han asks, “Who are you?”  The Strange Alien Bounty Hunter takes off its helmet to reveal that it is actually—Martin Landau!  Actually, it’s Leia.  “Someone who loves you,” she tells him.  “Calista?” he asks.  It’s not.  It’s Leia.  They kiss.  It’s sweet.  There’s laughing.  It’s Jabba the Hut and his entire Crazy dance party.  They were waiting in the shadows the whole time.  Jabba’s Crazy Dance Party is actually a lot like those high-profile cocaine parties from the eighties.  I think George Lucas was trying to say something.

Han tries to bargain with Jabba—and sounds like a used-car dealer in the process—but it’s no use.  He’s chucked into prison while Jabba takes Leia and…well…metal bikini.  It’s interesting to note that the metal bikini has become the fuel to the fire of countless fanboys’ fantasies.  I guess it’s a boy thing.  It doesn’t look comfortable at all, Carrie Fisher looks mortified, and the whole idea of being a sex slave to a huge slug shows that George Lucas was one sick motherfucker.  He really is.  Freudians will analyze this trilogy and officially announce that George Lucas probably should have been locked up long ago (preferably before he made the Star Wars prequels).

In the last wave of the attack, everybody stupidly decides to go banco on Luke Skywalker.  Because if the past two movies have taught us anything, it’s that Luke Skywalker gets things done, damn it.  He comes in, says a lot of things in a sage-like manner, and is ultimately thrown into the cage of that big monster that ate the Alien Dancing Girl.  This scene is really sad, because a hog-like guard is thrown in as well, and as he tries desperately to crawl up the walls of the cave, the big monster picks him up and eats him as he squeals like the hog creature that he is.  George Lucas, you are a sick bastard.  In any case, Luke gets out of it with his Jedi Skillz, and as a reward for his obvious prowess, Jabba sends him, Han, and Chewie into the Living Pit Thing (a pit with a thing that eats other things). 

Before this, Han and Luke have a funny exchange:

Luke: You’re not missing much.  I used to live here, you know.

Han: You’re going to die here, you know.  Convenient.

Han says shit like this the entire time.  I love him.  So a lot of things happen at the Living Pit Thing.  Because that’s the kind of happening place it is.  Luke has a Master Plan and gets them all out of trouble, but not before Lando Calrissian (who was there as well) almost gets eaten by the monster.  When I saw this for the first time, I was very worried about Lando, despite the fact that I had no idea who he was.  My thoughts were more or less, “Won’t someone please help that poor black man!  He’s the only black man in the galaxy!”  And it was true.  During the whole big fracas, Leia (still a sex slave in a metal bikini) strangles Jabba with her chains.  Typical sex slave/pimp-related murder.  George, I said it once and I’ll say it again—you are one sick son of a bitch.

So after everyone is saved, Luke goes to finish his training with Yoda, and I guess the others just fuck around the galaxy a little more.  Yoda dies.  Why does one of the most beloved characters in the trilogy die?  I can only guess it’s because Lucas is a sick man, hates all that is good in the world, and didn’t want to pay Frank Oz any more than he had to.  The thing is, Yoda looks kind of funny before he dies.  His eyes are kind of crossed, and his ears are bent, and damn it if he’s making any sense to me.  Kind of like Ronald Reagan, I guess.  Yep, I went there. 

Obi-Wan Kenobe doesn’t know when he’s licked, and his spirit won’t go away.  Luke doesn’t let the fact that Obi’s dead stop him from bothering him with questions.  Yoda does mention that “there is another” right before he dies.  Another?  Wasn’t the Darth-Vader-Is-Luke’s-Father thing big enough?  And, hey, it turns out to be Leia!  What kind of galaxy is this, where everyone turns out to be related to one another?  Is this galaxy located in the Deep South part of the universe?  Luke is shocked, shocked to learn not only that Leia is his sister, but also that: 1) he kissed—and probably had romantic feelings for—his sister, and 2) he saw his sister in a metal bikini.  George, you sick fuck…

Hey, guess what!  Remember when we thought that the Death Star had exploded to teeny tiny bits and would never ever be a threat, ever again?  Well we were wrong!  Because it’s back!  And they have to blow it up real good again!  Han, Luke, & Co. resolve to destroy it, and while they’re at it, they should probably just destroy the Empire while they’re at it.  Because, you know, it’s getting to be a nuisance.  They go to the forest moon of Endor, where the power station of the Death Star’s force field is located, while everyone else (including Lando, who gets to fly in the Millenium Falcon) waits in space so they can blow up the Death Star II and all the other Imperial fleets.  Han’s a greater person than I am; I won’t let anyone drive my PT Cruiser to the grocery store.  Just goes to show you how much he’s matured (and how immature and insecure I am). 

Carrie Fisher has a cigarette-laden voice.  Just wanted to point that out.  And Harrison Ford is still hot (even if he does just seem to be here for laughs).

Cool Endor hover-bike chase scene!  The price of admission is worth it.  I’d recreate this scene whenever I was biking through the forest when I was younger.  And the part where Leia wrecks her hover-bike and is thrown to the ground?  That scene was recreated a lot.  I never found myself approached by Ewoks though.  More like rabid raccoons.  In any case, Luke succeeds in losing his sister and wrecking his own bike.  My own sister was like him in that respect. 

Another funny line—just after Luke & Co. realize that Leia is missing, R2D2 beeps a bit and C3PO says to him, “And you said it was pretty here.”

Ewoks.  Ewoks are funny little things.  I’m thinking that Lucas put them in the movie just to appease the li’l kiddies (the metal bikini probably placed a lot of odd, uncomfortable questions in their fragile little minds).  Twenty years later, a good deal of these li’l kiddies will loathe those little teddy bear creatures with a passion.  I don’t care about them one way or another—they’re all right and they move the story along.  I remember knowing of them, and liking them, as a little kid—about six years before I’d even seen the movie.  Insane.  The Ewoks are somehow able to capture Han & Co.  How they’re able to do this, I have no idea.  They might be smarter than you think.  And, they have spears.  Funnily enough, they accept C3PO as their god.  No kidding.  Methinks they would have accepted the McDonald’s Golden Arch as their god if the situation had presented itself.  They take them all back to their tree-top living arrangement, with C3PO enthroned, and everyone else (even poor R2D2) tied up to be roasted over flames, slowly.  These li’l guys are the cutest.  And hey, there’s Leia!  She’s up there in the Tree Top Compound as well!  She looks like a hippie folk singer!  Luke is a fucking tool, to the point where I actually kind of miss the whiny Luke of the Past.  They’re saved when Luke uses his Skillz to make everything all right.  Why he didn’t fucking do this in the first place, I have no idea.  Luke and Leia manage to have a heart-to-heart, wherein Luke tells her that she’s his sister and, uh, Darth Vader is their dad.  Leia is shocked, shocked not only by this, but also by the realization that: 1) she kissed (and probably had romantic feelings for) her brother, 2) her father tried to kill her numerous times, 3) her father destroyed her entire home planet, 4) her father froze her boyfriend in carbonite, and 5) her brother saw her in a metal bikini.  Tough times.  Han’s confused by the fact that everyone looks really shocked, but no one will tell him anything.  Welcome to my world, buddy.  He thinks Luke and Leia are in love.  Dude, you don’t want to know what you’ve gotten yourself into.

Luke surrenders himself to Darth Vader (that sounded dirty) thinking that Darth would show some compassion for the first time in, oh, six years.  He’s wrong.  His punk ass gets owned by Darth, who takes him to the Emperor.  Luke doesn’t want to give up the hope that his dad might actually be a nice guy, and will let him by, just this once.  Kid, I’ve had the same problem with just about a million teachers.  It won’t work.  Your ass is toast.  Although I will admit, I was never given the chance to fight-to-the-death with any of my teachers.  Unfortunately.

More stuff happens.  For the rest of the movie, Han & Co. try to get into that power station and turn off the force field of the Death Star II.  Ewoks are involved.  It is both cute and sad, as little Ewok soldiers lay down their lives for a cause that I’m fairly sure none of them have ever heard about until now, or can never ever really comprehend, no less.  Imagine going into the woods outside your house, gathering up all the squirrels in the forest, and explaining to them that we’re at war right now, and would really like their help in fighting, because you see we have all these intergalactic congresses and councils and things went to hell and an Empire sprang up, etc.  They’ll be sure to help you out.

Luke meets the Emperor.  It doesn’t go well.  Darth Vader refers to Luke as “my son” a bit too much in front of the boss.  Luke, Darth, and the Emperor spend the rest of the movie in a deadly game of cat-and-mouse, as Luke realizes that if he doesn’t fight Vader, then his friends will die and the rebellion will be crushed, but if he gives into his anger, then the Dark Side will win.  It’s a bit of a pickle.  And, Lando and the rest of the Rebels pick a dogfight against the Empire’s big-ass ships.  I mention this because some of John Williams’ best music in the trilogy comes from these scenes.  Han & Co. continue to fight on Endor—first getting caught (“You rebel scum”, a Storm Trooper says when he catches them, which led me to believe for a very long time that all rebels were cool, until I learned about all that Civil War stuff.  Some rebels really aren’t cool.)   In the end, they’re saved by the Ewoks.  See, aren’t you surprised that even though they seem small and powerless, they actually play a huge part in aiding the heroes of the movie?  Doesn’t this make you feel a bit better about being short and weak?  Those li’l guys are dangerous though.  Never forget that.  They viciously take out an entire battalion of Storm Troopers and their Evil Chicken-Like Tank Things.  They could tear you apart, given the chance, and still seem adorable as your bloodied entrails are dangling from their fangs.  R2D2 gets shot and explodes (poor thing).  An Ewok dies on-screen.  It is Sad.  Hundreds of rebel fighters are killed when the Death Star II blows up their ships.  It’s not as Sad.  The only other black guy in the galaxy (an X-wing fighter pilot) dies.  So does an Asian guy.  It’s Weird.

At one point in the light saber duel, Darth Vader picks apart Luke’s mind and discovers that Leia is his daughter.  He actually doesn’t seem too shocked at this, probably because: 1) he’s evil.  I just wanted to mention this part (where Darth threatens to get Leia and Luke gets angry and fights him full-force) because the music in it is really cool.  It’s probably my favorite part of the movie.  Ironically enough, just when Han & Co. get things straight on Endor and turn off the force field, and Lando & Co. fly into the Death Star II and try to blow it up, the Emperor decides that Luke isn’t going to give in and proceeds to slowly torture and kill him, as Darth watches.  Luke pleads for his father to help him, once again showing that he really hasn’t learned anything.  You need to fight your own battles, son.  You can’t go running off to Daddy whenever you need help.  Vader shows that he really hasn’t learned anything about being a father by picking up the Emperor and tossing him down a very deep cavern, thus killing himself in the process.  Before he dies he asks for Luke to take his mask off, so that he can look on his son “with my own eyes”.  This is surprisingly sad, not least of all because this is the end of James Earl Jones’ cool Evil Darth Vader voice.  He takes off the helmet to reveal—Humpty Dumpty!  Yes, his dad has a face that looks like an egg.  Darth Vader dies.  Luke gets out of the Death Star II before Lando & Co. blows it up.  Back on Endor, Han & Co. celebrate the destruction of the Death Star II (the explosion is pretty).  He tells Leia that, when Luke comes back, “I won’t get in your way.”  He’s so cute when he’s emotionally destroyed.  Leia laughs at him and tells him that it’s not like that, that Luke’s not heavy, he’s her brother.  Funny part: you can see that fact slowly register on Han’s face, and he grins and kisses her. 

So there are several CGI-produced shots of various planets celebrating the end of the Empire, and then we go back to Endor, where everyone involved is partying with the Ewoks.  The original sickeningly-sweet Ewok song of the original movie is gone on the DVD, replaced by a much-nicer instrumental.  Luke decides to delay his partying so he can burn his dead dad on pyre (I hate parties too, Luke).  Then he joins his friends and everybody hugs and dances and it’s cute.  Luke looks out into the distance and sees—dear God—the spirits of Obi-Wan Kenobe, Yoda, and his Dad!  The schizophrenia has finally set in!  In the DVD version, we see not the original actor who played Egg-Faced-Dad Anakin Skywalker, but Hayden Christensen, who plays Anakin in the prequels.  This is terrible.  He’s considerably bigger than Obi-Wan, and he looks evil and displaced.  In any case, Luke waves and runs off to join his friends.  The last shot of the movie is of them all—Luke, Leia, Chewbacca, R2D2 and C3PO, Lando, and the Real Hero Han—sitting together and laughing and stuff.  The Empire has been crushed, the Dark Side has been defeated, and one thing is for certain: everyone is going to need a lot of therapy.

[Photo is from ScreenFish]

#Star Wars #Return of the Jedi #Billy Dee Williams #Carrie Fisher #Richard Marquand

[persorene]

in the festival of bonds dlc (that never got localized -sob sob-) dwyer says that jakob talks his ears off about how happy he is to be married to be corrin and nobody loves her more than he does, to the point where he's just become immune to it. do you think you could write about that?

“Dwyer…” Jakob sighed as he took in the sight of the disheveled manor. As per usual, his son had left the house to fall to ruin. Jakob cleaned it every time he visited but the point seemed rather moot.

“What? I like it this way.” Dwyer grumbled, shoving a crate out of his way with his foot as he walked into the foyer.

Jakob pinched the bridge of his nose, fighting back the urge to gripe at his son. Corrin hadn’t been able to come along for their visit today, if she found out he’d snapped at their boy again…

“Let’s get this over with.” The teenager mumbled as he bent over to scoop up a pile of papers he’d left lying on the floor.

“No, just- just leave it alone.”

Dwyer’s eyes widened “What’s wrong pop, you sick?” he teased, laying the back of his hand across his father’s forehead as if to feel for the warmth of a fever.

“I just think you and I could do something fun instead.”

“Do you- do you know what fun is? I assumed you were like allergic to it or something.”

“Oh ha ha. Are you certain you haven’t been wasting your time on comedy lessons?” Jakob taunted “Besides, I can be fun. Have I ever told you about the time your mother and I-”

“I’m pretty sure you’ve told me every story about mom.” Dwyer grumbled. He knew he should appreciate how much his parents loved one another, the fact that he was a product of such an intense love should’ve been a point he was proud of, but his father had a tendency to speak only of his mother and little else. It could become quite tiresome, especially for an apathetic teenager.

“I doubt it, but clearly you aren’t interested in hearing this one.” Jakob folded his arms, rolling his eyes at his child in process.

“Alright, oh Captain of Fun Times, what are we doing today?”

Jakob exhaled deeply, placing his hands on his hips in a bold pose “Well. We… we can take a walk!”

“Really? That’s your fun idea?”

“Would you rather I go back to cleaning your messes?” The butler snapped.

“No.” The boy sighed.

“Good, I never get to see much of your realm anyway. Let’s go.”

_______________________________________

“You know, I really am positive that you don’t know what fun means.” Dwyer panted as he dropped down onto the ground. The pair had stopped at the top of a hill, perched high above a crystalline lake and hedged by thick forests on all sides.

“You aren’t really that tired are you?” Jakob teased as he fell back onto the grass beside his son “Must I insist on more walks to prevent you from becoming sedentary?”

“Dad!”

Jakob’s laughter filled the air. His laughed quickly proved infectious as his son began to cackle along with him, laughing even harder as his father flung a pile of leaves at him in an uncharacteristically playful display of affection. Dwyer fervently reached for another pile, chucking them at his father who still lay on the ground howling with laughter. The exchange quickly devolved into a small war, each one rushing to pile more of the dying foliage on the other.  Jakob began to wheeze, his chest heaving as he flopped back down onto the ground, a bright orange leaf clinging to his hair as the white locks fell loose from their usually pristine pony tail.

“I guess you are capable of having fun.” Dwyer taunted as he fell back into place at his father’s side.

“I told you I was.”

“Yes, well, it was hard to believe until I saw it. That answers one question I’ve always had.”

“And what question is that?” Jakob muttered, he had let his eyes drift closed as he lay in the warm autumn sun.

“Don’t get your feelings hurt, but, what mom saw in you.”

There was a pause, Jakob’s eyes drifted open and scanned the sky, his chest rose and fell in heavy succession as he worked on an answer “I’ll be honest Dwyer, I don’t know what she sees in me.”

“Dad, I didn’t mean to-”

“No, it’s already out in the open, we should talk about it. My feelings aren’t hurt, I’ve wondered the same thing for years. I know I talk your ear off about how much I love your mum and how lucky I am to have her, but, I do that because it’s true. I love her with every ounce of my being and I am so, so very lucky that she chose to love me back… but I don’t know why she did. I’m not worthy of her, I never was. I am the penniless bastard of an awful nobleman, her servant, a man with an awful temper and no happiness besides that which she has brought me… so what on Earth made her love me?” his voice was soft and distant as he thought over his insecurities once again.

He lay in silence again, relieving his moments with the princess “I know you insist I’ve told you every story about your mother, but did I ever tell you about the time we tried to run away?”

Dwyer shook his head in response. His father had never mentioned it before and it came as quite a shock to the boy. Jakob was as straight laced and proper as a butler could be, his father was obedient to fault and certainly didn’t seem like the type of man who’d run away with a princess in tow.

“Well.” Jakob smirked, a soft laugh leaving his lips “Guess I haven’t told you everything then. Your mother hated being a prisoner, she hated being trapped with no access to the outside world. She yearned to explore and travel. I had taken her outside on occasion, but never far and always with permission. As we grew, she became more and more depressed about her confinement, to the point that I was concerned for her. Of course, I was always concerned for her, I loved her. And because I loved her, I agreed to accompany her when she told me she was going to leave.

We waited until after dinner, Gunter would be off working and the staff would be cleaning the mess from dinner. We packed a few belongings and slipped out unnoticed, I was honestly surprised how easy it was. She laughed as she ran, the wind rushing through her hair, her feet dancing across the cool grass. She was free and so, so lovely. I knew  how mad this plan was, but I would have done anything for her.

We made it into the next village over by nightfall, the streets were empty, the street lamps were lit and the fountain in the town center was bubbling. Your mother grabbed my hands and pulled me into the circle, in an instant she was holding my hands and spinning me around in an erratic pattern that somewhat resembled a dance. We were laughing and I was felt my stomach fluttering, she and I had done it, we were free and together and all of my dreams were within reach.

Then we heard the guards. And we ran. We didn’t know where to go, so we fled into the forest hoping to avoid capture. But they had hounds with them, it didn’t take long for them to locate us. We were pulled from the brush and separated, your mother was thrown onto a horse and carried back home before we could make sense of what had happened. I was left alone, I stood calm and still but inside I was a disaster. What I had done was treason and I could, and likely would, be tried and executed for it.

Gunter stepped forward, glaring at me… I was prepared for him to unleash hell, but he shocked me and called off the guards. He sent them home and swore them to silence, then he and I remained. His eyes never left me and I wasn’t stupid enough to look away. ‘Where have you been?’ he asked me. I told him we’d run away because she couldn’t take this life anymore. He told me what I had done was the stupidest thing he’d ever seen. However, he admired me and my devotion to her. I dare not tell him my reason was a stupid and senseless love for her, though I’m sure he knew. We walked back to the castle, I was lectured the entire way but he assured me Corrin was in just as much trouble, however, it would stay our secret and no one would ever know it.

That stood true, until just now. You are the first person I’ve ever shared that story with.”

“… That’s incredible.” Dwyer whispered “Grandpa really saved you guys didn’t he?”

“He isn’t as awful as I act like he is.”

“Dad… Do you have any more stories?”

“I thought you were sick of my old stories?” Jakob teased.

“Well, maybe if you’d tell more interesting ones sometimes.”

“Okay, okay…” The butler laughed heartily “I suppose if you’re interested I can tell a few more.”

[toastiel]

Never An Option

This was written as an entry to the Louden Swain Bang, courtesy of @mrswhozeewhatsis. Hope this is alright. If you love it, leave a comment?

Title: Never An Option Author: Toastiel Word Count: 1201 Genre: General Pairing: Chuck/Donna (Chonna) Rating:T Song: Change the Locks Summary: He ruins everything he touches. Everything except her.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

It was always nice when things went according to plan, when there were no bumps in the road or hiccups to worry about.

Not that Chuck would know what that felt like. He was used to setbacks. Hell, a bump in the road would be nice once in awhile compared to the catastrophic failure that had become so commonplace. His entire existence was one failure after another. He’d failed at being God, he’d sure as hell failed at being a father figure. He’d failed as a writer, and he’d kinda failed at creation (though he did place part of that blame on his conniving, vindictive twin). Then, to make it all come full circle, he’d failed at being a failure and returned to being God. Most days he wasn’t even sure if he was winning or losing or just standing out in left field waiting for the ball to smack him in the face.

The only exception, he thought, was her. He hadn’t failed with her, at least not yet. He prayed to himself that he never would, because losing her would be it for him. For someone that was supposed to be omnipotent, Chuck had been completely blindsided when Donna Hanscum had sauntered into his life, all smiles and sunshine. Maybe it was the fact that she was so opposite him, so optimistic and full of energy. Maybe it was her constant reassurance to everyone around her that things would work out, or maybe it was the fact that, despite all of this, she was just as broken inside as he was. She just did a better job of hiding it.

Regardless of why, Donna had situated herself firmly in his life and in his heart, and Chuck would be damned if he gave her up without a fight. He’d given up too much already.

Not her. Never her.

~

He wanted to scream, to rage, to make the entire universe quake with the power of his fury.

It was ruined. All of it, ruined. Weeks of planning the perfect evening, of prepping, of making sure that every last detail was as perfect as it could possibly be (because she deserved nothing less for her birthday), all down the drain, and for what? 

Doug fucking Kantos.

Chuck should have known things couldn’t just go smoothly, he should have be prepared for the conniving little snake to appear (it always did, after all). Still, he let out a heavy sigh of bone deep wariness, nothing could have ever prepared him for this, which was saying something because, hell, he’d raised Lucifer and Gabriel.

He should have smote the smug bastard where he stood, he fumed as he paced the library of the bunker. He should have just reached out and smote the shit out of him. One look at the man had told Chuck all he needed to know, and the look in Donna’s eyes had cemented the notion that he was a vile, repugnant, little cockroach. He should have spared the world (and the poor woman on his arm) some trouble and wiped the jackass from existence.

Instead, he’d taken Donna’s hand and turned her around, whisking them back home.

‘You ran,’ he chastised himself as he shook his head. ‘You ran like you always do, because you're a coward. No wonder she doesn’t want to look at you. I don’t want to look at you. 

The mirror over on one of the lower bookcases he’d been glaring into shattered, the tinkling of glass falling to the concrete floor echoing throughout the suddenly too quiet room. He’d never heard a sound that perfectly resembled his life before, but if one existed, that was it; the sound of bitter disappointment, despair, and self-loathing.

“Aaaaargh!” Chuck roared, the entire building trembling from the force of it. He pointedly ignored the Winchesters as they appeared to assess the problem. He chose instead to slam his fist into the nearest wall, the pain radiating up his arm and helping to dull the ache in his chest.

It was all his fault. He was losing her because he wasn’t good enough to keep her, and they both knew it. With a huff of irritation, he vanished. He needed to calm down, to think, and he couldn’t risk hurting the few people that cared about him in the process.

He never saw her watch him leave.

~

He sure as hell hadn’t been expecting her to be there waiting when he came back either, but there she was, sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of tea, wrapped up in her fuzzy pink bathrobe with her bunny slippered feet tucked up underneath her. It almost looked normal.

“Feel better?” Something was off about her tone and it tore at something deep inside him.

“Not really.” He sighed, running one hand through his already mussed curls.

She sighed and stood, taking slow, shuffling steps toward him. He could see she’d been crying. Her eyes were puffy, her cheeks were blotchy, and her nose was red. Even so, she was still one of the most beautiful things in existence. His heart clenched at the realization that he was the reason for her tears. He’d hurt her. He’d made her cry, and he couldn’t forgive himself for that.

“Donna, I-”

“Stop,” she whispered, pressing one warm finger to his lips. “Stop thinking so loud. Stop beating yourself up. Stop blaming yourself. Just...stop, Chuck.”

He let out a whoosh of air, his entire body deflating as the anger he’d been carrying just slipped away.

“Let’s go to bed.” She smiled warmly at him, her brown eyes glimmering in the florescent lighting.

“But I-”

“Shush.” Donna sat her cup on the island and took one of his hands between both of hers, still warm from the cup. “There’s plenty of time to talk tomorrow. Now, bed.”

“Just like that? You’re not...I left and...I ran...I’m…”He didn’t know how to actually voice his fears.

“Oh, no, I am. I ate half a bag of Dean’s powdered doughnuts, and two of Gabriel’s chocolate bars he thinks I don’t know about. That’s on you, so you betcha I’m not a happy camper, Charles Shurley, but I’m tired, so we’ll talk about it in the morning.”

“Bu-”

“Bed. Now.”

Feeling for all the world like a scolded child, Chuck hung his head, letting her lead him by the hand to the room they shared. He supposed it could have been worse, and come morning he could very well be spending the next month in the dog house, but he had her. Even with all his self-pitying and his temper tantrums and his insecurities, he still had her. If she could weather the storm that was Chuck Shurley, he had hope that losing her would never be an issue.

“Hey,” he whispered as they snuggled down beneath the blankets, his nose pressed into her hair.

“Hmm?”

“Thank you.”

“For?”

“For being here.”

“Here is right where I want to be, silly.” Donna muttered sleepily, fighting back a yawn. “Now, for the last time, shush and go to bed.”

He pulled her flush against him, the warmth of her seeping into his flesh and bones and chasing away the cold that had taken over. He’d be better, fight harder, prove he deserved her. He had to.

Losing her wasn't an option.

#Louden Swain Mini Bang 2017 #Louden Swain #Rob Benedict #Supernatural #Oneshot #Fic #Chonna #fuckyeahchonna #introspection #Donna Hanscum #Chuck Shurley #relationshipfic #established relationship #Change The Locks #No Time Like The Present

[artificialqueens]

You Belong To Me Ch.2 (Trixya) - Red

A/N- Thank you all so much for reading again. I"m still getting to grip the terms of writing, I used to write a lot (fanfiction) and I would appreciate feedback! Negative or positive say anything! Thank you again!

T/W- Swearing as per usual

“Last night you were in my room, and now my bedsheets smell like you” Trixie sang at the top of her lungs, whilst scrubbing her silk-like skin in the fresh shower.

Trixie loved to sing, she loved to express her voice and showcase that. There was no denying Trixie was talented but she still had her insecurities of course. Her weight, her face and her social skills. Katya had always convinced her she had beautiful curves and not every girl was stick thin. She had also told her every day she was pretty or cute, usually through a pun or some sort.

There was also no denying Katya was her number one fan, and vise versa. Trixie had a massive crush on her in the past. Trixie was still young, still discovering herself. Katya could probably do better than her, she just wished things had turned out differently, no one could make Trixie happier than Katya. Not even Taylor.

“Every day discovering something brand new, I’m in love with your body” Trixie sang, her strong voice wavering as she washed her hair with Strawberry shampoo. Trixie thought more in depth about her relationship with Taylor. Sure he was nice, and kept her warm. She had almost convinced herself she was straight. That is something that’ll never happen.

She was interrupted from her thoughts when Katya bust in the door wearing her short sweatpants and a cotton vest. Katya headed to the sink, grabbing her toothbrush.

“Katya! Fuck off” Trixie covered her innocence as Katya laughed menacingly. “Not like I havent seen it all before, cunt” Katya managed to get out from all the minty foam in her mouth.

Trixie shook her head and turned her back to her, washing her shoulders. Katya stolen a look at Trixies bare back, but quickly turned away, blushing furiously.

“Taylors coming over,” Trixie spoke after silence. Katya groaned and splashed water in her face. Trixie giggled. “He’s not that bad, Kat, we’re supposed to be going to a drive-in-movie tonight.” Trixie smiled to herself, finally a night off. Katya shook her head. “So I’ll be the lonely widow tonight” Katya washed her hands, looking at her bare face in the mirror. Trixie laughed loudly. “Go out tonight, get yourself a woman.”

Katya rolled her eyes and walked out. She picked out a nice red and black dress, a perfect fit to her petit body and tied her hair up. After 15 minutes, Trixie walked out in pink tartan shorts and top, looking like a body suit. “Looking good, Tracey.” Katya complimented. “You look not so bad yourself.” They both giggled and walked out to get breakfast.

“What movie are you going to see, Trix?” Katya asked as they both walked into the kitchen. “I’m not too sure yet, I’m looking forward to getting shitty snacks from 7/11 that is sure to give me diabetes.” Katya laughed at Trixies joke, pushing her lightly. The 2 cups of coffee sat at the worktop with freshly with Trixies newly bought jeans ironed and folded up. Katya grabbed her coffee a bit too quick and spilled all over Trixies gorgeous pair of jeans. “Shit, Trix i’m sorry!” Katya ran over to the kitchen roll and panicked. Trixie leaned on the counter and giggled. Katya gave Trixie the evil eye and shoved her towards the window where it was painted with raindrops. “Rains beautiful” Trixie stated. Whilst Trixie was staring at her beauty, Katya was staring at her.

-

The doorbell went. Katya rushed to get it after discussing about the show they were watching, Shameless, and talking who they would be. Trixie said she’d more likely to be Fiona Gallagher, caring but also a bit of a slut. Katya said she’d be Frank Gallagher. Enough said.

Katya opened the door with a bright smile but immediately dropped when she seen the deformed fuck face that was Taylor. “Oh, its you. Come in” Katya opened the door and walked in, sitting next to Trixie. Almost protecting her territory. Taylor came in and kissed Trixie. Katya looked at them. Why was that bastard but not her? He was a complete ass. His views were shitty, he said gay people made him feel uncomfortable and that women should be in the kitchen. Katya was almost convinced he voted for Trump. Katyas heart eventually sank when the kiss was held for more than 5 seconds. Katya in no way was self pitying herself, she just felt shitty. Well wouldn’t you if someone you loved for years on end kissed another man. Watching someone she couldn’t have was crushing her, thats why she had always turned on alcohol, but cut down now. Thankfully.

“How’re you Trix?” Taylor asled, leaning back on the leather seat. Katya stared at the TV screen, flicking through channels when she spotted the music channel playing the song Trixie was singing earlier. She smiled to herself whilst Trixie and Taylor made small chat.

“Babe, I can’t make it tonight, I’m sorry.” Taylor apologised. Katya looked over at a disappointed Trixie. “It’s alright, I’ll just work on a new song or something.” she mumbled. That bastard! Katya looked at him, he looked almost guilty.

That boy was too fishy for her liking, he was always up to something.

After 2 hours of them talking and Katya growling, Taylor left, claiming he had to run some errands. Bullshit. Katya had tried to cheer Trixie up afterwards. With her Barbara voice and horrific dancing which resulted in Katya nearly breaking her actual leg trying to death drop.

Katya understood Trixies sadness and let her be. Trixie claimed she wanted to start writing a new song. That is when the big stupid-ass lightbulb appeared at the top of her head.

“Trix, I’ll be 20 minutes, I need to get some groceries, mainly milk. Do you need anything?” Katya peered from Trixies door, seeing Trixie lie on her bed, guiatr on the other side of the bed, and it all covered in paper.

“Don’t think so.” Trixie shook her head. Trixie was about to walk away when she seen the drive-in movie poster and snatched it from the desk quickly and ran to the car.

Drive-In-Movie - Juliette park -

7.30pm-10.00pm - Admission fee $9

Showing - Me Before You

Katya started the car up and headed to the nearest supermarket., stuffing the poster in the cup holder. Katyas short heels clicked as she passed through the bright isles looking at stuff to get. She picked up milk and looked over to her left, looking down at a pair of heels and a pair of coverse. Katya looked up more and seen a younger woman, with big lips and nice eyebrows chatting to a little bit older woman with a big smile and a good sense of fashion. They actually looked in love. Katya smiled at them. The younger one looked at Katya and gasped and ran over to her. Katya was about to oiss her panties because what the fuck.

“Hey! You might not know me but I’m Adore! I’m a friend of Violets! I recognised you!” Adore smiled widely, touching the cling-film wrapped around her red arm.

The older woman chuckled at Adores actions and approached. “Don’t mind this bitch, she just wants to pretend to know a lot of people. I’m Bianca” Bianca held her hand out to shake it, Katya obliged, smiling. “Nice to meet you, I’m Katya if you didn’t hear.” They all giggled. “Whats up with your arm, Adore?” Katya asked curiously.

Adore turned her arm, revealing a beautiful flower with ‘Mia Bella’ under it. “I got it today, stings like a fucker but yea.” She held Biancas hand.

“Why 'my beautiful’?” Katya clicked her heels, looking up. Katya was basically a translator and knew shit. Adores tattoo was quite cheesy but at the same time, adorable.

Bianca held Adores waist. “This little cunt wanted a tattoo to remind herself of me, she wouldnt get the devil on her arm but would get some sappy shit like this.” Adore shoved her, smiling.

“Thats-thats fucking cute!” Katya was snatched. “How long have you been together?”

Bianca answered. “Secretly, a year or something.” Adore nodded.

“Secretly?"

"Well, she is my lecturer after all.”

Katya was really fucking snatched bald.

“I know right?” Bianca laughed. “Scandal waiting to happen.”

Katya shook her head, laughing along. “Your secrets safe with me."

"Hey dude, whats your number? We should all hang out sometime, Violet told me you have a crush thats your roommate, right?” Adore got her phone out, snatching Katyas from her hand filling in the numbers.

Katya stuttered, coughing slightly. “Um, Yeah Trixie. She doesnt know though, she’s taken."

Adore and Bianca looked up at her. Shit.

"Not for any longer, bitch.” Bianca smirked at Katya, then grabbed Adores hand when Adore passed to phone to Katya.

“I’ll text ya later, Katya, bye!” Adore waved.

“Bye Katya.” Bianca smiled and walked with Adore.

Katya waved and sighed happily. They were nice.

Katya smiled at the possibility of nice friends, she was sure Trixie would like them. She proceeded to walk around the supermarket, picking up stuff like bread, milk and tampons. Then she picked up crisps, ready made pizza, chocolate, candy. Making sure everything was pink. Pink lemonade, pink smarties, pink popcorn. Who knew right? Pink popcorn.

Katya made sure everything was perfect, she even got a cute little basket to put stuff in. When everything was paid for, Katya stuffed the basket in the boot and the groceries in the front seat.

Juilette park was only half an hour drive away so she had 1 or 2 to get ready and tell Trixie to get ready. Trixie definitely needed the 2 hours.

When Katya got home she sighed and looked into Trixies room door. Trixie had a pen in her mouth, ink running down her h=chin as she played a few cords.

“Hey bitch,you been sucking off a Smurf?” Katya greeted, laughing slightly.

Trixie gasped as she touched her mouth and ran into the bathroom, looking down at the ink stained fingers and attempted to frantically rub the ink off.

Katya stood and chucked at her friend. What a ditz. “Be ready at 6.50pm please” Katya asked, smiling a little bit. Trixie furrowed her eyebrows. “Why?" Katya tapped her nose and walked out the room leaving an ink stained Trixie confused.

-

6.45pm, Katya was excited. She had redone her makeup, the bold red lipstick complimented her darker eyes. Her dress looked beautiful, hugging her in all the right places. She stepped out with her wallet, keys and phone. Leaning on the breakfast bar, Katya sorted her dress, smoothing it out. Earlier she put the basket in the front seat and reminded herself to stop into a gas station.

Trixie walked out, wearing a beautiful pale pink dress with lace all over. It was beautiful. Her hair curly but loose and her makeup making her look the even more irresistible. Katya muttered under her breathe how gorgeous she looked but Trixie stood there smiling.

"Uh- Um lets go! Yeah lets go to the car” Katya laughed and walked out the apartment, Trixie following after. Katya was smiling herself becoming very excited.

Katya entered the car and let Trixie wonder for a minute what a basket was doing there. “Katya, what is this?” She held the basket in her lap, smiling confused.

“WE’RE GOING TO THE DRIVE-IN MOVIE THINGY CINEMAS BITCH!” Katya jumped up in her car seat, starting the car and blasting the music. Trixie gasped and hugged her.

“Thank you! Thank you Kat!” She beamed, leaving Katya pleased with herself, starting up the car.

“Well lets go then.”

#trixya #trixie mattel #katya zamolodchikova #fluff #biadore #rpdr fanfiction #submission #you belong to me