something i think about too often is when Merlin in episode one asked Gaius if he were a monster.
another thing i think about too often is how Merlin was never good at healing magic.
so now i present you: Merlin thinking of himself as someone that can only destroy and hurt, and not heal. he knows he uses his magic for a good cause, to protect Arthur, but it is always about hurting people, about killing. whenever he needs his magic for healing, he fails. whoever learns about his magic, dies and gets hurt. freya. will. lancelot. gaius almost died multiple times.
i think that, at the end of the day, a part of Merlin is scared of people knowing he has magic not because of what those people will do to him, but because of what what will happen to those people.
i think that a part of Merlin is scared that he is a monster. Merlin knows magic can be good. he isn't sure if he is good.
Just saw a video like "um actually rocky horror isn't good queer representation because frank sexually assaults janet" girl he kills and eats people. It's called the rocky HORROR picture show not the rocky cute gay rep tw t-slur picture show
sometimes. i just have to remind myself that percy took annabeth to paris. like, canonically. he forgot their one-month anniversary. and took his girl to paris to make up for it. the standards are in elysium.
In universe, Dick Grayson's equivalent of Bruce dropping out of med school is absolutely everyone demanding to know why he didn't go to the Olympics with his gymnastics abilities.